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+
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #66661 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/66661)
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-The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Truth about an Author, by Arnold Bennett
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you
-will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before
-using this eBook.
-
-Title: The Truth about an Author
-
-Author: Arnold Bennett
-
-Release Date: November 4, 2021 [eBook #66661]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-Produced by: Laura Natal Rodrigues
-
-*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE TRUTH ABOUT AN AUTHOR ***
-
-THE TRUTH ABOUT
-
-AN AUTHOR
-
-
-
-
-NEW EDITION WITH PREFACE
-
-
-
-
-BY
-
-ARNOLD BENNETT
-
-Author of "How to Live on 24 Hours a Day,"
-"The Old Wives' Tale," etc.
-
-
-
-
-GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY
-
-PUBLISHERS
-
-NEW YORK
-
-
-
-
-_Copyright, 1911_
-By George H. Doran Company
-
-
-
-
-CONTENTS
-PREFACE TO THE NEW EDITION
-CHAPTER I
-CHAPTER II
-CHAPTER III
-CHAPTER IV
-CHAPTER V
-CHAPTER VI
-CHAPTER VII
-CHAPTER VIII
-CHAPTER IX
-CHAPTER X
-CHAPTER XI
-CHAPTER XII
-CHAPTER XIII
-CHAPTER XIV
-CHAPTER XV
-CHAPTER XVI
-
-
-
-
-PREFACE TO THE NEW EDITION
-
-
-Sometime in the last century I was for several years one of the most
-regular contributors to "The Academy," under the editorship of Mr. Lewis
-Hind and the ownership of Mr. Morgan Richards. The work was constant;
-but the pay was bad, as it too often is where a paper has ideals. I well
-remember the day when, by dint of amicable menaces, I got the rate
-raised in my favor from ten to fifteen shillings a column, with a
-minimum of two guineas an article for exposing the fatuity of popular
-idols. One evening I met Mr. Lewis Hind at the first performance of some
-very important play, whose name I forget, in the stalls of some theatre
-whose name I forget. (However, the theatre has since been demolished.)
-We began to talk about the "Academy", and as I was an editor myself, I
-felt justified in offering a little advice to a fellow-creature. "What
-you want in the 'Academy,'" I said, "is a sensational serial." "Yes, I
-know," he replied, with that careful laziness of tone which used to mark
-his more profound utterances, "and I should like you to write your
-literary autobiography for us!" In this singular manner was the notion
-of the following book first presented to me. It was not in the least my
-own notion.
-
-I began to write the opening chapters immediately, for I was fascinated
-by this opportunity to tell the truth about the literary life, and my
-impatience would not wait. I had been earning a living by my pen for a
-number of years, and my experience of the business did not at all
-correspond with anything that I had ever read in print about the
-literary life, whether optimistic or pessimistic. I took a malicious and
-frigid pleasure, as I always do, in setting down facts which are opposed
-to accepted sentimental falsities; and certainly I did not spare myself.
-It did not occur to me, even in the midst of my immense conceit, to
-spare myself. But even had I been tempted to spare myself I should not
-have done so, because there is no surer way of damping the reader's
-interest than to spare oneself in a recital which concerns oneself.
-
-The sensational serial ran in "The Academy" for about three months, but
-I had written it all in the spare hours of a very much shorter period
-than that. It was issued anonymously, partly from discretion, and partly
-in the hope that the London world of letters would indulge in conjecture
-as to its authorship, which in theory was to be kept a dark secret. The
-London world of letters, however, did nothing of the kind. Everybody who
-had any interest in such a matter seemed to know at once the name of the
-author. Mr. Andrew Chatto, whose acquaintance I made just then, assured
-me that he was certain of the authorship of the first article, on
-stylistic evidence; and I found him tearing out the pages of the
-"Academy" and keeping them. I found also a number of other people doing
-the same. In fact I do not exaggerate in saying that the success of the
-serial was terrific--among about a hundred people. It happened to me to
-see quite sane and sober writing persons gurgle with joy over the mere
-recollection of sundry scenes in my autobiography. But Mr. Andrew
-Chatto, an expert of immense experience, gave me his opinion, with
-perhaps even more than his customary blandness, that the public would
-have no use for my autobiography. I could scarcely adopt his view. It
-seemed to me impossible that so honest a disclosure, which had caused
-such unholy joy in some of the most weary hearts that London contains,
-should pass unheeded by a more general public.
-
-Mr. Andrew Chatto did not publish this particular book of mine. I cannot
-remember if it was offered to him. But I know that it was offered to
-sundry other publishers before at last it found a sponsor. There was no
-wild competition for it, and there was no excitement in the press when
-it appeared. On the other hand, there was a great deal of excitement
-among my friends. The book divided my friends into two camps. A few were
-extraordinarily enthusiastic and delighted. But the majority were
-shocked. Some--and among these the most intimate and beloved--were so
-shocked that they could not bear to speak to me about the book, and to
-this day have never mentioned it to me. Frankly, I was startled. I
-suppose the book was too true. Many fine souls can only take the truth
-in very small doses, when it is the truth about some one or something
-they love. One of my friends--nevertheless a realistic novelist of high
-rank--declined to credit that I had been painting myself; he insisted on
-treating the central character as fictional, while admitting the events
-described were factual.
-
-The reviews varied from the flaccid indifferent to the ferocious. No
-other book of mine ever had such a bad press, or anything like such a
-bad press. Why respectable and dignified organs should have been moved
-to fury by the publication of a work whose veracity cannot be impugned,
-I have never been quite able to understand; for I attacked no financial
-interests; I did not attack any interest; I merely destroyed a few
-illusions and make-believes. Yet such organs as "The Athenaeum" and
-"Blackwood's" dragged forward their heaviest artillery against the
-anonymous author. In its most virulent days "Blackwood's" could scarcely
-have been more murderous. Its remarks upon me will bear comparison even
-with its notorious attack, by the same well-known hand, on Mr. Bernard
-Shaw. I had, of course, ample opportunities for adjusting the balance
-between myself and the well-known hand, which opportunities I did not
-entirely neglect. Also I was convinced that the time had arrived for
-avowing the authorship, and I immediately included the book in the
-official list of my publications. Till then the dark secret had only
-once been divulged in the press--by Sir W. Robertson Nicoll. But this
-journalist, whose interest in the literary life is probably unsurpassed,
-refrained from any criticism.
-
-I have purposely forgotten the number of copies sold. It was the
-smallest in my experience of infinitesimal numbers. In due season the
-publishers--to my regret, and conceivably now to theirs--'remaindered'
-the poor red-and-green volume. And The Times Book Club, having
-apparently become possessed of a large stock of the work, offered it,
-with my name but without my authority, at a really low price. I think
-the first bargain was fivepence, but later sixpence was demanded. As The
-Times Book Club steadily continued to advertise the book, I suppose that
-at sixpence it must have had quite a vogue. At any rate it has been
-quoted from with more freedom than any other book of mine, and has
-indeed obviously formed the basis of dozens of articles--especially in
-the United States--of which the writers have omitted to offer me any
-share in their remuneration. I have myself bought copies of it at as
-high as a shilling a piece, as a speculation. And now here, after about
-a dozen years, is a new edition, reproducing word for word the original
-text in all its ingenuous self-complacency.
-
-
-
-
-I
-
-
-I who now reside permanently on that curious fourth-dimensional planet
-which we call the literary world; I, who follow the incredible parasitic
-trade of talking about what people have done, who am a sort of public
-weighing-machine upon which bookish wares must halt before passing from
-the factory to the consumer; I, who habitually think in articles, who
-exist by phrases; I, who seize life at the pen's point and callously
-wrest from it the material which I torture into confections styled
-essays, short stories, novels, and plays; who perceive in passion
-chiefly a theme, and in tragedy chiefly a "situation"; who am so
-morbidly avaricious of beauty that I insist on finding it where even it
-is not; I, in short, who have been victimized to the last degree by a
-literary temperament, and glory in my victimhood, am going to trace as
-well as I can the phenomena of the development of that idiosyncrasy from
-its inception to such maturity as it has attained. To explain it, to
-explain it away, I shall make no attempt; I know that I cannot. I lived
-for a quarter of a century without guessing that I came under the
-category of Max Nordau's polysyllabic accusations; the trifling foolish
-mental discipline which stands to my credit was obtained in science
-schools, examination rooms, and law offices. I grew into a good man of
-business; and my knowledge of affairs, my faculty for the nice conduct
-of negotiations, my skill in suggesting an escape from a dilemma, were
-often employed to serve the many artists among whom, by a sheer and
-highly improbable accident, I was thrown. While sincerely admiring and
-appreciating these people, in another way I condescended to them as
-beings apart and peculiar, and unable to take care of themselves on the
-asphalt of cities; I felt towards them as a policeman at a crossing
-feels towards pedestrians. Proud of my hard, cool head, I used to twit
-them upon the disadvantages of possessing an artistic temperament. Then,
-one day, one of them retorted: "You've got it as badly as any of us, if
-you only knew it." I laughed tolerantly at the remark, but it was like a
-thunderclap in my ears, a sudden and disconcerting revelation. Was I,
-too, an artist? I lay awake at night asking myself this question.
-Something hitherto dormant stirred mysteriously in me; something
-apparently foreign awoke in my hard, cool head, and a duality henceforth
-existed there. On a certain memorable day I saw tears in the eyes of a
-woman as she read some verses which, with journalistic versatility, I
-had written to the order of a musical composer. I walked straight out
-into the street, my heart beating like a horrid metronome. Am I an
-artist? I demanded; and the egotist replied: Can you doubt it?
-
-From that moment I tacitly assumed a quite new set of possibilities, and
-deliberately ordered the old ruse self to exploit the self just born.
-And so, by encouragement and fostering, by intuition and imitation, and
-perhaps affectation, I gradually became the thing I am, the _djinn_ that
-performs tricks with, some emotions, a pen, and paper. And now, having
-shadowed forth the tale, as Browning did in the prologue to _The Ring
-and the Book_, I will proceed to amplify it.
-
-
- Let this old woe step on the stage again!
- Act itself o'er anew for men to judge.
-
-
-
-
-II
-
-
-My dealings with literature go back, I suppose, some thirty and three
-years. We came together thus, literature and I. It was in a kitchen at
-midday, and I was waiting for my dinner, hungry and clean, in a tartan
-frock with a pinafore over it. I had washed my own face, and dried it,
-and I remember that my eyes smarted with lingering soap, and my skin was
-drawn by the evaporation of moisture on a cold day. I held in my hand a
-single leaf which had escaped from a printed book. How it came into that
-chubby fist I cannot recall. The reminiscence begins with it already
-there. I gazed hard at the paper, and pretended with all my powers to be
-completely absorbed in its contents; I pretended to ignore some one who
-was rattling saucepans at the kitchen range. On my left a very long and
-mysterious passage led to a pawnshop all full of black bundles. I heard
-my brother crying at the other end of the passage, and his noisy
-naughtiness offended me. For myself, I felt excessively "good" with my
-paper; never since have I been so filled with the sense of perfect
-righteousness. Here was I, clean, quiet, sedate, studious; and there was
-my brother, the illiterate young Hooligan, disturbing the sacrosanct
-shop, and--what was worse--ignorant of his inferiority to me. Disgusted
-with him, I passed through the kitchen into another shop on the right,
-still conning the page with soapy, smarting eyes. At this point the
-light of memory is switched off. The printed matter, which sprang out of
-nothingness, vanishes back into the same.
-
-I could not read, I could not distinguish one letter from another. I
-only knew that the signs and wonders constituted print, and I played at
-reading with intense earnestness. I actually felt learned, serious,
-wise, and competently superior, something like George Meredith's "Dr.
-Middleton." Would that I could identify this my very first literature! I
-review three or four hundred books annually now;[1] out of crass,
-saccharine, sentimentality, I would give a year's harvest for the volume
-from which that leaf was torn, nay, for the leaf alone, as though it
-might be a Caxton. I remember that the paper was faintly bluish in tint,
-veined, and rather brittle. The book was probably printed in the
-eighteenth century. Perhaps it was Lavater's Physiognomy or Blair's
-Sermons, or Burnet's Own Time. One of these three, I fancy, it must
-surely have been.
-
-After the miraculous appearance and disappearance of that torn leaf, I
-remember almost nothing of literature for several years. I was six or so
-when The Ugly Duckling aroused in me the melancholy of life, gave me to
-see the deep sadness which pervades all romance, beauty, and adventure.
-I laughed heartily at the old henbird's wise remark that the world
-extended past the next field and much further; I could perceive the
-humour of that. But when the ugly duckling at last flew away on his
-strong pinions, and when he met the swans and was accepted as an equal,
-then I felt sorrowful, agreeably sorrowful. It seemed to me that nothing
-could undo, atone for, the grief and humiliations of the false
-duckling's early youth. I brooded over the injustice of his misfortunes
-for days, and the swans who welcomed him struck me as proud, cold, and
-supercilious in their politeness. I have never read The Ugly Duckling
-since those days. It survives in my memory as a long and complex
-narrative, crowded with vague and mysterious allusions, and wet with the
-tears of things. No novel--it was a prodigious novel for me--has more
-deliciously disturbed me, not even "On the Eve" or "Lost Illusions." Two
-years later I read "Hiawatha." The picture which I formed of Minnehaha
-remains vividly and crudely with me; it resembles a simpering waxen doll
-of austere habit. Nothing else can I recall of "Hiawatha," save odd
-lines, and a few names such as Gitchee-Gumee. I did not much care for
-the tale. Soon after I read it, I see a vision of a jolly-faced
-house-painter graining a door. "What do you call that?" I asked him,
-pointing to some very peculiar piece of graining, and he replied,
-gravely: "That, young sir, is a wigwam to wind the moon up with." I
-privately decided that he must have read, not "Hiawatha," but something
-similar and stranger, something even more wig-wammy. I dared not
-question him further, because he was so witty.
-
-I remember no other literature for years. But at the age of eleven I
-became an author. I was at school under a master who was entirely at the
-mercy of the new notions that daily occurred to him. He introduced games
-quite fresh to us, he taught us to fence and to do the lesser circle on
-the horizontal bar; he sailed model yachts for us on the foulest canal
-in Europe; he played us into school to a march of his own composing
-performed on a harmonium by himself; he started a debating society and
-an amateur dramatic club. He even talked about our honour, and, having
-mentioned it, audaciously left many important things to its care--with
-what frightful results I forget. Once he suffered the spell of
-literature, read us a poem of his own, and told us that any one who
-tried could write poetry. As it were to prove his statement, he ordered
-us all to write a poem on the subject of Courage within a week, and
-promised to crown the best poet with a rich gift. Having been commanded
-to produce a poem on the subject of Courage, I produced a poem on the
-subject of Courage in, what seemed to me, the most natural manner in the
-world. I thought of lifeboats and fire-engines, and decided on lifeboats
-for the mere reason that "wave" and "save" would rhyme together. A
-lifeboat, then, was to save the crew of a wrecked ship. Next, what _was_
-poetry? I desired a model structure which I might copy. Turning to a
-school hymn-book I found--
-
-
- A little ship was on the sea,
- It was a pretty sight;
- It sailed along so pleasantly
- And all was calm and bright
-
-
-That stanza I adopted, and slavishly imitated. In a brief space a poem
-of four such stanzas was accomplished. I wrote it in cold blood,
-hammered it out word after word, and was much pleased with the result.
-On the following day I read the poem aloud to myself, and was thrilled
-with emotion. The dashing cruel wave that rhymed with save appeared to
-me intensely realistic. I failed to conceive how any poem could be
-better than mine. The sequel is that only one other boy besides myself
-had even attempted verse. One after another, each sullenly said that he
-had nothing to show. (How clever _I_ felt!) Then I saw my rival's
-composition; it dealt with a fire in New York and many fire-engines; I
-did not care for it; I could not make sense of much of it; but I saw
-with painful clearness that it was as far above mine as the heaven was
-above the earth. . . .
-
-"Did you write this yourself?" The master was addressing the creator of
-New York fire-engines.
-
-"Yes, sir."
-
-"All of it?"
-
-"Yes, sir."
-
-"You lie, sir."
-
-It was magnificent for me. The fool, my rival, relying too fondly on the
-master's ignorance of modern literature, had simply transcribed entire
-the work of some great American recitation-monger. I received the
-laurel, which I fancy amounted to a shilling.
-
-Nothing dashed by the fiasco of his poetry competition, the schoolmaster
-immediately instituted a competition in prose. He told us about M.
-Jourdain, who talked prose without knowing it, and requested us each to
-write a short story upon any theme we might choose to select. I produced
-the story with the same ease and certainty as I had produced the verse.
-I had no difficulty in finding a plot which satisfied me; it was
-concerned with a drowning accident at the seaside, and it
-culminated--with a remorse--less naturalism that even thus early
-proclaimed the elective affinity between Flaubert and myself--in an
-inquest. It described the wonders of the deep, and I have reason to
-remember that it likened the gap between the fin and the side of a fish
-to a pocket. In this competition I had no competitor. I, alone, had
-achieved fiction. I watched the master as he read my work, and I could
-see from his eyes and gestures that he thought it marvellously good for
-the boy. He spoke to me about it in a tone which I had never heard from
-him before and never heard again, and then, putting the manuscript in a
-drawer, he left us to ourselves for a few minutes.
-
-"I'll just read it to you," said the big boy of the form, a daring but
-vicious rascal. He usurped the pedagogic armchair, found the manuscript,
-rapped the ruler on the desk, and began to read. I protested in vain.
-The whole class roared with laughter, and I was overcome with shame. I
-know that I, eleven, cried. Presently the reader stopped and scratched
-his head; the form waited.
-
-"Oh!" he exclaimed. "Fishes have pockets! Fishes have pockets!"
-
-The phrase was used as a missile against me for months.
-
-The master returned with his assistant, and the latter also perused the
-tale.
-
-"Very remarkable!" he sagely commented--to be sage was his foible, "very
-remarkable, indeed!"
-
-Yet I can remember no further impulse to write a story for at least ten
-years. Despite this astonishing success, martyrdom, and glory, I
-forthwith abandoned fiction and went mad on water-colours.
-
-
-[Footnote 1: Written in 1900.]
-
-
-
-
-III
-
-
-The insanity of water-colours must have continued for many years. I say
-insanity, because I can plainly perceive now that I had not the
-slightest genuine aptitude for graphic art. In the curriculum of South
-Kensington as taught at a provincial art school I never got beyond the
-stage known technically as "third-grade freehand," and even in that my
-"lining-in" was considered to be a little worse than mediocre. O floral
-forms, how laboriously I deprived you of the grace of your Hellenic
-convention! As for the "round" and the "antique," as for pigments, these
-mysteries were withheld from me by South Kensington. It was at home,
-drawn on by a futile but imperious fascination, that I practised them,
-and water-colours in particular. I never went to nature; I had not the
-skill, nor do I remember that I felt any sympathetic appreciation of
-nature. I was content to copy. I wasted the substance of uncles and
-aunts in a complicated and imposing apparatus of easels, mahlsticks,
-boards, What-man, camel-hair, and labelled tubes. I rose early, I
-cheated school and office, I outraged the sanctity of the English
-Sabbath, merely to satisfy an ardour of copying. I existed on the Grand
-Canal in Venice; at Toledo, Nuremburg, and Delft; and on slopes
-commanding a view of Turner's ruined abbeys, those abbeys through whose
-romantic windows streamed a yellow moonlight inimitable by any
-combination of ochre, lemon, and gamboge in my paint-box. Every replica
-that I produced was the history of a disillusion. With what a sanguine
-sweep I laid on the first broad washes--the pure blue of water, the
-misty rose of sun-steeped palaces, the translucent sapphire of Venetian
-and Spanish skies! And then what a horrible muddying ensued, what a
-fading-away of magic and defloriation of hopes, as in detail after
-detail the picture gradually lost tone and clarity! It is to my credit
-that I was always disgusted by the fatuity of these efforts. I have not
-yet ceased to wonder what precise part of the supreme purpose was served
-by seven or eight years of them.
-
-From fine I turned to applied art, diverted by a periodical called "The
-Girl's Own Paper." For a long period this monthly, which I now regard as
-quaint, but which I shall never despise, was my principal instrument of
-culture. It alone blew upon the spark of artistic feeling and kept it
-alive. I derived from it my first ideals of aesthetic and of etiquette.
-Under its influence my brother and myself started on a revolutionary
-campaign against all the accepted canons of house decoration. We
-invented friezes, dadoes, and panels; we cut stencils; and we carried
-out our bright designs through half a house. It was magnificent,
-glaring, and immense; it foreshadowed the modern music-hall. Visitors
-were shown through our rooms by parents who tried in vain to hide from
-us their parental complacency. The professional house-decorator was
-reduced to speechless admiration of our originality and extraordinary
-enterprise; he really was struck--he could appreciate the difficulties
-we had conquered.
-
-During all this, and with a succession of examinations continually
-looming ahead, literature never occurred to me; it was forgotten. I
-worked in a room lined with perhaps a couple of thousand volumes, but I
-seldom opened any of them. Still, I must have read a great deal,
-mechanically, and without enthusiasm: serials, and boys' books. At
-twenty-one I know that I had read almost nothing of Scott, Jane Austen,
-Dickens, Thackeray, the Brontës, and George Eliot. An adolescence
-devoted to water-colours has therefore made it forever impossible for me
-to emulate, in my functions of critic, the allusive Langism of Mr.
-Andrew Lang; but on the other hand, it has conferred on me the rare
-advantage of being in a position to approach the classics and the
-alleged classics with a mind entirely unprejudiced by early
-recollections. Thus I read David Copperfield for the first time at
-thirty, after I had written a book or two and some hundreds of articles
-myself. The one author whom as a youth I "devoured" was Ouida, creator
-of the incomparable Strathmore, the Strathmore upon whose wrath the sun
-unfortunately went down. I loved Ouida much for the impassioned nobility
-of her style, but more for the scenes of gilded vice into which she
-introduced me. She it was who inspired me with that taste for liaisons
-under pink lampshades which I shall always have, but which, owing to a
-puritanical ancestry and upbringing, I shall never be able to satisfy.
-Not even the lesson of Prince Io's martyrdom in "Friendship" could cure
-me of this predilection that I blush for. Yes, Ouida was the unique
-fountain of romance for me. Of poetry, save "Hiawatha" and the enforced
-and tedious Shakespeare of schools, I had read nothing.
-
-The principal local daily offered to buy approved short stories from
-local readers at a guinea apiece. Immediately I wrote one. What, beyond
-the chance of a guinea, made me turn so suddenly to literature I cannot
-guess; it was eight years since I had sat down as a creative artist. But
-I may mention here that I have never once produced any literary work
-without a preliminary incentive quite other than the incentive of
-ebullient imagination. I have never "wanted to write," until the
-extrinsic advantages of writing had presented themselves to me. I cannot
-recall that I found any difficulty in concocting the story. The heroine
-was named Leonora, and after having lost sight of her for years, the
-hero discovered her again as a great actress in a great play. (Miss
-Ellen Terry in "Faust" had passed disturbingly athwart my existence.) I
-remember no more. The story was refused. But I firmly believe that for a
-boy of nineteen it was something of an achievement. No one saw it except
-myself and the local editor; it was a secret, and now it is a lost
-secret. Soon afterwards another local newspaper advertised for a short
-serial of local interest. Immediately I wrote the serial, again without
-difficulty. It was a sinister narrative to illustrate the evils of
-marrying a drunken woman. (I think I had just read "L'Assommoir" in
-Vizetelly's original edition of Zola.) There was a street in our town
-named Commercial Street. I laid the scene there, and called it
-Speculation Street. I know not what satiric criticism of modern life was
-involved in that change of name. This serial too was refused; I suspect
-that it was entirely without serial interest.
-
-I had matriculated at London University three years before, and was then
-working, without heart, for a law degree (which I never won); instead of
-Ouida my nights were given to Austin's Jurisprudence, the Institutes of
-Justinian and of Gaius, and Maine's Ancient Law; the last is a great and
-simple book, but it cannot be absorbed and digested while the student is
-pre-occupied with the art of fiction. Out of an unwilling respect for
-the University of London, that august negation of the very idea of a
-University, I abandoned literature. As to water-colours, my tubes had
-dried up long since; and house-decoration was at a standstill.
-
-The editor of the second newspaper, after a considerable interval, wrote
-and asked me to call on him, for all the world as though I were the
-impossible hero of a journalistic novel. The interview between us was
-one of these plagiarisms of fiction which real life is sometimes guilty
-of. The editor informed me that he had read my sinister serial with deep
-interest, and felt convinced, his refusal of it notwithstanding, that I
-was marked out for the literary vocation. He offered me a post on his
-powerful organ as a regular weekly contributor, without salary. He said
-that he was sure I could write the sort of stuff he wanted, and I
-entirely agreed with him. My serene confidence in my ability, pen in
-hand, to do anything that I wished to do, was thus manifest in the
-beginning. Glory shone around as I left the editorial office. The
-romantic quality of this episode is somewhat impaired by the fact, which
-I shall nevertheless mention, that the editor was a friend of the
-family, and that my father was one of several optimistic persons who
-were dropping money on the powerful organ every week. The interview,
-however, was indeed that peculiar phenomenon (so well-known to all
-readers of biography) styled the "turning-point in one's career." But I
-lacked the wit to perceive this for several years.
-
-The esteemed newspaper to which I was now attached served several fairly
-large municipalities which lay so close together as to form in reality
-one very large town divided against itself. Each wilful cell in this
-organism was represented by its own special correspondent on the
-newspaper, and I was to be the correspondent for my native town. I had
-nothing to do with the news department; menial reporters attended to
-that. My task was to comment weekly upon the town's affairs to the
-extent of half a column of paragraphic notes.
-
-"Whatever you do, you must make your pars bright," said the editor, and
-he repeated the word--"Bright!"
-
-Now I was entirely ignorant of my town's affairs. I had no suspicion of
-the incessant comedy of municipal life. For two days I traversed our
-stately thoroughfares in search of material, wondering what, in the
-names of Horace Greeley, James Gordon Bennett, and Mr. Delane, my first
-contribution was going to consist of. Law went to the devil, its natural
-home. Then I happened to think of tram-lines. The tram-lines, under the
-blessing of Heaven, were badly laid, and constituted a menace to all
-wheeled traffic save trams; also the steam-engines of the trams were
-offensive. I wrote sundry paragraphs on that topic, and having thus
-acquired momentum, I arrived safely at the end of my half column by the
-aid of one or two minor trifles.
-
-In due course I called at the office to correct proof, and I
-was put into the hands of the sub-editor. It was one of those
-quarters-of-an-hour that make life worth living; for the sub-editor
-appreciated me; nay, he regarded me as something of a journalistic
-prodigy, and his adjectives as he ran through the proof were extremely
-agreeable. Presently he came to a sentence in which I had said that
-such-and-such a proceeding "smacked of red tape."
-
-"'Smacked of red tape'?" He looked up at me doubtfully. "Rather a mixed
-metaphor, isn't it?"
-
-I didn't in the least know what he meant, but I knew that sentence
-was my particular pet. "Not at all!" I answered with feeling. "Nothing
-of the sort! It _does_ smack of red tape--you must admit that."
-
-And the sentence stood. I had awed the sub-editor.
-
-My notes enjoyed a striking success. Their brightness scintillated
-beyond the brightness of the comments from any other town. People
-wondered who this caustic, cynical, and witty anonymous wag was. I
-myself was vastly well satisfied; I read the stuff over and over again;
-but at the same time I perceived that I could make my next contribution
-infinitely more brilliant. And I did. I mention this matter, less
-because it was my first appearance in print, than because it first
-disclosed to me the relation between literature and life. In writing my
-stories I had never thought for a moment of life. I had made something,
-according to a model, not dreaming that fiction was supposed to reflect
-real life. I had regarded fiction as--fiction, a concoction on the plane
-of the Grand Canal, or the Zocodover at Toledo. But in this other
-literature I was obliged to begin with life itself. The wheel of a
-dog-cart spinning off as it jammed against a projecting bit of
-tram-line; a cyclist overset: what was there in that? Nothing. Yet I had
-taken that nothing and transformed it into something--something that
-seemed important, permanent, _literary_. I did not comprehend the
-process, but I saw its result. I do not comprehend it now. The man who
-could explain it could answer the oft-repeated cry: What is Art?
-
-Soon afterwards I had a delightful illustration of the power of the
-press. That was the era of coffee-houses, when many excellent persons
-without too much humour tried all over the country to wean the populace
-from beer by the superior attractions of coffee and cocoa; possibly they
-had never tasted beer. Every town had its coffee-house company, limited.
-Our coffee-house happened to be a pretty bad one, while the coffee-house
-of the next town was conspicuously good. I said so in print, with my
-usual display of verbal pyrotechny. The paper had not been published an
-hour before the aggrieved manager of our coffee-house had seen his
-directors on the subject. He said I lied, that I was unpatriotic, and
-that he wanted my head on a charger; or words to that effect. He asked
-my father, who was a director of both newspaper and coffee-house,
-whether he could throw any light on the identity of the scurrilous and
-cowardly scribe, and my father, to his eternal credit, said that he
-could not. Again I lived vividly and fully. As for our coffee-house, it
-mended its ways.
-
-The County Council Bill had just become law, and our town enjoyed the
-diversions of electing its first County Councillor. The rival candidates
-were a brewer and a prominent lay religionist. My paper supported the
-latter, and referred to the conflict between the forces of civilization
-and the forces of barbarism. It had a magnificent heading across two
-columns: "Brains versus Beer," and expressed the most serene confidence
-as to the result. Of course, my weekly notes during the campaign were a
-shield and a buckler to the religionist, who moreover lived next door.
-
-The result of the poll was to be announced late on the night before the
-paper went to press. The editor gave me instructions that _if_ we lost,
-I was to make fun of the brewer, and in any case to deliver my copy by
-eleven o'clock next morning. We lost heavily, disastrously; the forces
-of civilization were simply nowhere. I attended the declaration of the
-poll, and as the elated brewer made his speech of ceremony in front of
-the town hall, I observed that his hat was stove-in and askew. I
-fastened on that detail, and went to bed in meditation upon the
-facetious notes which I was to write early on the morrow. In the middle
-of the night I was wakened up. My venerable grandfather, who lived at
-the other end of the town, had been taken suddenly ill and was dying. As
-his eldest grandson, my presence at the final scene was indispensable. I
-went, and talked in low tones with my elders. Upstairs the old man was
-fighting for every breath. The doctor descended at intervals and said
-that it was only a question of hours. I was absolutely obsessed by a
-delicious feeling of the tyranny of the press. Nothing domestic could be
-permitted to interfere with my duty as a journalist.
-
-"I must write those facetious comments while my grandfather is dying
-upstairs!" This thought filled my brain. It seemed to me to be fine,
-splendid. I was intensely proud of being laid under a compulsion so
-startlingly dramatic. Could I manufacture jokes while my grandfather
-expired? Certainly: I was a journalist. And never since have I been more
-ardently a journalist than I was that night and morning. With a strong
-sense of the theatrical, I wrote my notes at dawn. They delicately
-excoriated the brewer.
-
-The curious thing is that my grandfather survived not only that, but
-several other fatal attacks.
-
-A few weeks later, my newspaper was staggering under the blow of my
-migration to London.
-
-
-
-
-IV
-
-
-I came to London at the age of twenty-one, with no definite ambition,
-and no immediate object save to escape from an intellectual and artistic
-environment which had long been excessively irksome to me. Some
-achievement of literature certainly lay in the abyss of my desires, but
-I allowed it to remain there, vague and almost unnoticed. As for
-provincial journalism, without meed in coin, it had already lost the
-charm of novelty, and I had been doing it in a perfunctory manner. I
-made no attempt to storm Fleet Street. The fact is that I was too much
-engaged in making a meal off London, swallowing it, to attend to
-anything else; this repast continued for over two years. I earned a
-scanty living as shorthand clerk, at first, in a solicitor's office; but
-a natural gift for the preparation of bills of costs for taxation, that
-highly delicate and complicated craft, and an equally natural gift for
-advancing my own interests, soon put me in receipt of an income that
-many "admitted" clerks would have envied: to be exact and prosaic, two
-hundred a year. Another clerk in the office happened to be an ardent
-bibliophile. We became friends, and I owe him much. He could chatter in
-idiomatic French like a house on fire, and he knew the British Museum
-Reading Room from its centre to its periphery. He first taught me to
-regard a book, not as an instrument for obtaining information or
-emotion, but as a _book_, printed at such a place in such a year by
-so-and-so, bound by so-and-so, and carrying colophons, registers,
-water-marks, and _fautes d'impression_. He was acquainted, I think, with
-every second-hand bookstall in the metropolis; and on Saturday
-afternoons we visited most of them. We lived for bargains and rarities.
-We made it a point of honour to buy one book every day, and when
-bargains failed we used to send out the messengers for a Camelot Classic
-or so--ninepence net; this series was just then at the height of its
-vogue. We were for ever bringing into the office formidable tomes--the
-choice productions of the presses of Robert and Henry Stephen, Elzevir,
-Baskerville, Giunta, Foulis, and heaven knows whom. My discovery of the
-Greek _editio princeps_ of Plutarch, printed by Philip Giunta at
-Florence in 1517, which I bought in Whitechapel for two shillings,
-nearly placed me on a level with my preceptor. We decidedly created a
-sensation in the office. The "admitted" clerks and the articled clerks,
-whom legal etiquette forbids as a rule to fraternize with the
-"unadmitted," took a naïve and unaffected pleasure in our society. One
-day I was examining five enormous folios full-bound in yellow calf, in
-the clients' waiting-room, when the senior partner surprised me thus
-wasting the firm's time.
-
-"What's all this?" he inquired politely. He was far too polite to
-remonstrate.
-
-"This, sir? Bayle's 'Dictionaire Historique et Critique,'" I replied.
-
-"Is it yours?"
-
-"Yes, sir. I bought it in the lunch-hour at Hodgson's."
-
-"Ah!"
-
-He retired abashed. He was a gentle fellow, and professed an admiration
-for Browning; but the chief thing of which he had the right to be proud
-was his absolutely beautiful French accent.
-
-I had scarcely been in London a year when my friend and I decided to
-collaborate in a bibliographical dictionary of rare and expensive books
-in all European languages. Such a scheme sounds farcical, but we were
-perfectly serious over it; and the proof of our seriousness is that we
-worked at it every morning before breakfast. I may mention also that we
-lunched daily at the British Museum, much to the detriment of our
-official duties. For months we must have been quite mad--obsessed. We
-got about as far as the New English Dictionary travelled in the first
-twenty years of its life, that is to say, two-thirds through A; and then
-suddenly, irrationally, without warning, we dropped it. The mere
-conception of this dictionary was so splendid that there was a grandeur
-even in dropping it.
-
-Soon after this, the managing clerk of the office, a university man,
-autocratic, but kindly and sagacious, bought a country practice and left
-us. He called me into his room to say good-bye.
-
-"You'd no business to be here," he said, sharply. "You ought to be doing
-something else. If I find you here when I visit town next, I shall look
-on you as a d----d fool. Don't forget what I say."
-
-I did not. On the contrary, his curt speech made a profound impression
-on me. He was thirty, and a man of the world; I was scarcely
-twenty-three. My self-esteem, always vigorous, was flattered into all
-sorts of new developments. I gradually perceived that, quite without
-intending it, I had acquired a reputation. As what? Well, as a learned
-youth not lacking in brilliance. And this reputation had, I am
-convinced, sprung solely from the habit of buying books printed mainly
-in languages which neither myself nor my acquaintances could read. I
-owned hundreds of books, but I seldom read any of them, except the
-bibliographical manuals; I had no leisure to read. I scanned. I can only
-remember, in this period, that I really studied one book--Plato's
-"Republic," which I read because I thought I was doing the correct
-thing. Beyond this, and a working knowledge of French, and an entirely
-sterile apparatus of bibliographical technique, I had mastered nothing.
-Three qualities I did possess, and on these three qualities I have
-traded ever since. First, an omnivorous and tenacious memory (now, alas,
-effete!)--the kind of memory that remembers how much London spends per
-day in cab fares just as easily as the order of Shakespeare's plays or
-the stock anecdotes of Shelley and Byron. Second, a naturally sound
-taste in literature. And third, the invaluable, despicable, disingenuous
-journalistic faculty of seeming to know much more than one does know.
-None knew better than I that, in any exact, scholarly sense, I knew
-nothing of literature. Nevertheless, I should have been singularly blind
-not to see that I knew far more about literature than nine-tenths of the
-people around me. These people pronounced me an authority, and I
-speedily accepted myself as an authority: were not my shelves a silent
-demonstration? By insensible degrees I began to assume the pose of an
-authority. I have carried that pose into newspaper offices and the very
-arcana of literary culture, and never yet met with a disaster. Yet in
-the whole of my life I have not devoted one day to the systematic study
-of literature. In truth, it is absurdly easy to impress even persons who
-in the customary meaning of the term have the right to call themselves
-well-educated. I remember feeling very shy one night in a drawing-room
-rather new to me. My host had just returned from Venice, and was
-describing the palace where Browning lived; but he could not remember
-the name of it.
-
-"Rezzonico," I said at once, and I chanced to intercept the look of
-astonishment that passed between host and hostess.
-
-I frequented that drawing-room a great deal afterwards, and was always
-expected to speak _ex cathedra_ on English literature.
-
-London the entity was at least as good as my dreams of it, but the
-general mass of the persons composing it, considered individually, were
-a sad disappointment. "What duffers!" I said to myself again and again.
-"What duffers!" I had come prepared to sit provincially at the feet of
-these Londoners! I was humble enough when I arrived, but they soon cured
-me of that--they were so ready to be impressed! What struck me was the
-extraordinary rarity of the men who really could "do their job." And
-when I found them, they were invariably provincials like me who had come
-up with the same illusions and suffered the same enlightenment. All who
-were successfully performing that feat known as "getting on" were
-provincials. I enrolled myself in their ranks. I said that I would get
-on. The "d----d fool" phrase of the Chancery clerk rang in my ears like a
-bugle to march.
-
-And for about a year I didn't move a step. I read more than I have ever
-read before or since. But I did nothing. I made no effort, nor did I
-subject myself to any mental discipline. I simply gorged on English and
-French literature for the amusement I could extract from such gluttony,
-and found physical exercise in becoming the champion of an excessively
-suburban lawn-tennis club. I wasted a year in contemplating the
-magnificence of my future doings. Happily I never spoke these dreams
-aloud! They were only the private solace of my idleness. Now it was that
-I at last decided upon the vocation of letters; not scholarship, not the
-dilettantism of belles-lettres, but sheer constructive journalism and
-possibly fiction. London, however, is chiefly populated by grey-haired
-men who for twenty years have been about to become journalists and
-authors. And but for a fortunate incident--the thumb of my Fate has
-always been turned up--I might ere this have fallen back into that
-tragic rearguard of Irresolutes.
-
-Through the good offices of my appreciative friends who had forgotten
-the name of the Palazzo Rezzonico, I was enabled to take up my quarters
-in the abode of some artists at Chelsea. I began to revolve, dazzled, in
-a circle of painters and musicians who, without the least affectation,
-spelt Art with the majuscule; indeed, it never occurred to them that
-people existed who would spell it otherwise. I was compelled to set to
-work on the reconstruction of nearly all my ideals. I had lived in a
-world where beauty was not mentioned, seldom thought of. I believe I had
-scarcely heard the adjective "beautiful" applied to anything whatever,
-save confections like Gounod's "There is a green hill far away." Modern
-oak sideboards were called handsome, and Christmas cards were called
-pretty; and that was about all. But now I found myself among souls that
-talked of beauty openly and unashamed. On the day that I arrived at the
-house in Chelsea, the drawing-room had just been papered, and the
-pattern of the frieze resembled nothing in my experience. I looked at
-it.
-
-"Don't you think our frieze is charming?" the artist said, his eyes
-glistening.
-
-It was the man's obvious sincerity that astounded me. O muse of mahogany
-and green rep! Here was a creature who took a serious interest in the
-pattern of his wall-papers! I expressed my enthusiasm for the frieze.
-
-"Yes," he replied, with simple solemnity, "_it is very beautiful_."
-
-This worship of beauty was continuous. The very teaspoons were banned or
-blessed on their curves, and as for my rare editions, they wilted under
-tests to which they were wholly unaccustomed. I possessed a _rarissime_
-illustrated copy of Manon Lescaut, of which I was very proud, and I
-showed it with pride to the artist. He remarked that it was one of the
-ugliest books he had ever seen.
-
-"But," I cried, "you've no idea how scarce it is! It's worth--"
-
-He laughed.
-
-I perceived that I must begin life again, and I began it again,
-sustained in my first efforts by the all-pervading atmosphere of ardour.
-My new intimates were not only keenly appreciative of beauty, they were
-bent on creating it. They dreamed of great art-works, lovely
-compositions, impassioned song. Music and painting they were familiar
-with, and from me they were serenely sure of literature. The glorious
-accent with which they clothed that word--literature! Aware beforehand
-of my authority, my enthusiasm, they accepted me with quick, warm
-sympathy as a fellow-idealist. Then they desired to know what I was
-engaged upon, what my aims were, and other facts exceedingly difficult
-to furnish.
-
-It happened that the most popular of all popular weeklies had recently
-given a prize of a thousand pounds for a sensational serial. When the
-serial had run its course, the editor offered another prize of twenty
-guineas for the best humorous condensation of it in two thousand words.
-I thought I might try for that, but I feared that my friends would not
-consider it "art." I was mistaken. They pointed out that caricature was
-a perfectly legitimate form of art, often leading to much original
-beauty, and they urged me to enter the lists. They read the novel in
-order the better to enjoy the caricature of it, and when, after six,
-evenings' labour, my work was done, they fiercely exulted in it. Out of
-the fulness of technical ignorance they predicted with certainty that I
-should win the prize.
-
-Here again life plagiarized the sentimental novel, for I did win the
-guineas. My friends were delighted, but they declined to admit a
-particle of surprise. Their belief in what I could do kept me awake at
-nights.
-
-This was my first pen-money, earned within two months of my change of
-air. I felt that the omen was favourable.
-
-
-
-
-V
-
-
-Now I come to the humiliating part of my literary career, the period of
-what in Fleet Street is called "free-lancing." I use the term
-"humiliating" deliberately. A false aureole of romance encircles the
-head of that miserable opportunist, the free-lance. I remember I tried
-to feel what a glorious thing it was to be a free-lance, dependent on
-none (but dependent on all), relying always on one's own invention and
-ingenuity, poised always to seize the psychological moment, and gambling
-for success with the calm (so spurious) of a dicer in the eighteenth
-century. Sometimes I deceived myself into complacency, but far more
-often I realized the true nature of the enterprise and set my teeth to
-endure the spiritual shame of it. The free-lance is a tramp touting for
-odd jobs; a pedlar crying stuff which is bought usually in default of
-better; a producer endeavouring to supply a market of whose conditions
-he is in ignorance more or less complete; a commercial traveller liable
-constantly to the insolence of an elegant West End draper's "buyer." His
-attitude is in essence a fawning attitude; it must be so; he is the poor
-relation, the doff-hat, the ready-for-anything. He picks up the crumbs
-that fall from the table of the "staff"--the salaried, jealous,
-intriguing staff--or he sits down, honoured, when the staff has
-finished. He never goes to bed; he dares not; if he did, a crumb would
-fall. His experience is as degrading as a competitive examination, and
-only less degrading than that of the black-and-white artist who trudges
-Fleet Street with a portfolio under his arm. And the shame of the
-free-lance is none the less real because he alone witnesses it--he and
-the postman, that postman with elongated missive, that herald of
-ignominy, that dismaying process-server, who raps the rap of
-apprehension and probable doom six, eight, and even twelve times per
-diem!
-
-The popular paper that had paid me twenty guineas for being facetious
-expressed a polite willingness to consider my articles, and I began to
-turn the life of a law-office into literature; my provincial experience
-had taught me the trick. Here was I engaged all day in drawing up bills
-of costs that would impose on a taxing-master to the very last
-three-and-fourpence; and there was the public in whose chaotic mind a
-lawyer's bill existed as a sort of legend, hieroglyphic and
-undecipherable. What more natural than a brief article--"How a bill of
-costs is drawn up," a trifling essay of three hundred words over which I
-laboured for a couple of evenings? It was accepted, printed, and with a
-postal order for ten shillings on the ensuing Thursday I saw the world
-opening before me like a flower. The pathos of my sanguine ignorance! I
-followed up this startling success with a careful imitation of it--"How
-a case is prepared for trial," and that too brought its ten shillings.
-But the vein suddenly ceased. My fledgling fancy could do no more with
-law, and I cast about in futile blindness for other subjects. I grew
-conscious for the first time of my lack of technical skill. My facility
-seemed to leave me, and my self-confidence. Every night I laboured dully
-and obstinately, excogitating, inventing, grinding out, bent always to
-the squalid and bizarre tastes of the million, and ever striving after
-"catchiness" and "actuality." My soul, in the arrogance of a certain
-achievement, glances back furtively, with loathing, at that period of
-emotional and intellectual dishonour. The one bright aspect of it is
-that I wrote everything with a nice regard for English; I would lavish a
-night on a few paragraphs; and years of this penal servitude left me
-with a dexterity in the handling of sentences that still surprises the
-possessor of it. I have heard of Fleet Street hacks who regularly
-produce sixty thousand words a week; but I well know that there are not
-many men who can come fresh to a pile of new books, tear the entrails
-out of them, and write a fifteen-hundred-word _causerie_ on them,
-passably stylistic, all inside sixty minutes. This means skill, and I am
-proud of it. But my confessions as a reviewer will come later.
-
-No! Free-lancing was not precisely a triumph for me. Call it my
-purgatorio. I shone sometimes with a feeble flicker, in half-crown
-paragraphs, and in jumpy articles under alliterative titles that now and
-then flared on a pink or yellow contents-bill. But I can state with some
-certainty that my earnings in the mass did not exceed threepence an
-hour. During all this time I was continually spurred by the artists
-around me, who naïvely believed in me, and who were cognizant only of my
-successes. I never spoke of defeat; I used to retire to my room with
-rejected stuff as impassive as a wounded Indian; while opening envelopes
-at breakfast I had the most perfect command of my features. Mere vanity
-always did and always will prevent me from acknowledging a reverse at
-the moment; not till I have retrieved my position can I refer to a
-discomfiture. Consequently, my small world regarded me as much more
-successful than I really was. Had I to live again, which Apollo forbid,
-I would pursue the same policy.
-
-During all this time, too, I was absorbing French fiction incessantly;
-in French fiction I include the work of Turgenev, because I read him
-always in French translations. Turgenev, the brothers de Goncourt, and
-de Maupassant were my gods. I accepted their canons, and they filled me
-with a general scorn of English fiction which I have never quite lost.
-From the composition of 'bits' articles I turned to admire "Fathers and
-Children" or "Une Vie," and the violence of the contrast never struck me
-at the time. I did not regard myself as an artist, or as emotional by
-temperament. My ambition was to be a journalist merely--cool, smart,
-ingenious, equal to every emergency. I prided myself on my impassivity.
-I was acquainted with men who wept at fine music--I felt sure that Saint
-Cecilia and the heavenly choir could not draw a single tear from my
-journalistic eye. I failed to perceive that my appreciation of French
-fiction, and the harangues on fiction which I delivered to my intimates,
-were essentially emotional in character, and I forgot that the sight of
-a successful dramatist before the curtain on a first-night always caused
-me to shake with a mysterious and profound agitation. I mention these
-facts to show how I misunderstood, or ignored, the progress of my
-spiritual development. A crisis was at hand. I suffered from insomnia
-and other intellectual complaints, and went to consult a physician who
-was also a friend.
-
-"You know," he said, in the course of talk, "you are one of the most
-highly-strung men I have ever met."
-
-When I had recovered from my stupefaction, I glowed with pride. What a
-fine thing to be highly-strung, nervously organized! I saw myself in a
-new light; I thought better of myself; I rather looked down on cool,
-ingenious journalists. Perhaps I dimly suspected that Fleet Street was
-not to be the end of all things for me. It was soon afterwards that the
-artists whom I had twitted about their temperament accused me of sharing
-it with them to the full. Another surprise! I was in a state of ferment
-then. But I had acquired such a momentum in the composition of articles
-destined to rejection that I continued throughout this crisis to produce
-them with a regularity almost stupid. My friends began to inquire into
-the nature of my ultimate purpose. They spoke of a large work, and I
-replied that I had no spare time. None could question my industry. "Why
-don't you write a novel on Sundays?" one of them suggested.
-
-The idea was grandiose. To conceive such an idea was a proof of
-imagination. And the air with which these enthusiasts said these things
-was entirely splendid and magnificent. But I was just then firmly
-convinced that I had no vocation for the novel; I had no trace of a
-desire to emulate Turgenev. Again and again my fine enthusiasts returned
-to the charge, urged on by I know not what instinct. At last, to please
-them, to quieten them, I promised to try to write a short story. Without
-too much difficulty I concocted one concerning an artist's model, and
-sent it to a weekly which gives a guinea each week for a prize story. My
-tale won the guinea.
-
-"There! We told you so!" was the chorus. And I stood convicted of
-underestimating my own powers; fault rare enough in my career!
-
-However, I insisted that the story was despicably bad, a commercial
-product, and the reply was that I ought next to write one for art's
-sake. Instead, I wrote one for morality's sake. It was a story with a
-lofty purpose, dealing with the tragedy of a courtesan's life. (No, I
-had not then read "Splendeurs et Misères des Courtisanes.") A prominent
-philanthropist with a tendency to faddism, who for morality's sake was
-running a monthly magazine, was much impressed by my tale, and after
-some trouble--the contributors were supposed to contribute _con
-amore_--I got another guinea. This story only pleased me for a few
-weeks; its crudity was too glaring. But I continued to write short
-stories, and several of them appeared in halfpenny evening papers.
-Gaining in skill, I aimed political skits in narrative form at the more
-exclusive, the consciously superior, penny evening papers, and one or
-two of these hit the mark. I admired the stuff greatly. Lo, I had risen
-from a concocter of 'bits' articles to be the scorpion-sting of cabinet
-ministers! My self-confidence began to return.
-
-Then, one day, one beneficent and adorable day, my brain was visited by
-a Plot. I had a prevision that I was about to write a truly excellent
-short story. I took incredible pains to be realistic, stylistic, and all
-the other _istics_, and the result amazed me. I knew that at last I had
-accomplished a good thing--I knew by the glow within me, the emotional
-fatigue, the vista of sweet labour behind me. What moved me to despatch
-this jewel, this bit of caviare-to-the-general, to the editor of a
-popular weekly with a circulation of a quarter of a million, I cannot
-explain. But so I did. The editor returned it with a note to say that he
-liked the plot, but the style was below his standard. I laughed, and,
-more happily inspired, sent it to the Yellow Book, where it duly
-appeared. The Yellow Book was then in apogee. Several fiercely literary
-papers singled out my beautiful story for especial praise.
-
-"By heaven!" I said, "I will write a novel." It was a tremendous
-resolution.
-
-I saw that I could _write_.
-
-
-
-
-VI
-
-
-But before continuing the narration of my adventures in fiction, I must
-proceed a little further in the dusty tracks of journalism. When I had
-laboured sordidly and for the most part ineffectively as a free-lance for
-two or three years, I became, with surprising suddenness, the
-assistant-editor of a ladies' paper. The cause of this splendid
-metamorphosis was sadly unromantic. I had not bombarded the paper, from
-the shelter of a pseudonym, with articles of unexampled brilliance. The
-editor had not invited his mysterious and talented contributor into the
-editorial sanctum, and there informed him that his exclusive services,
-at a generous salary, were deemed absolutely essential to the future
-welfare of the organ which he had hitherto assisted only on occasion. I
-had never written a line for the paper, nor for any ladies' paper. I
-obtained the situation by "influence," and that of the grossest kind.
-All that I personally did was to furnish a list of the newspapers and
-periodicals to which I had contributed, and some specimens of my printed
-work. These specimens proved rather more than satisfactory. The editor
-adored smartness; smartness was the "note" of his paper; and he
-discovered several varieties of smartness in my productions. At our
-first interview, and always afterwards, his attitude towards me was full
-of appreciation and kindness. The post was a good one, a hundred and
-fifty a year for one whole day and four half-days a week. Yet I was
-afraid to take it. I was afraid to exchange two hundred a year for a
-hundred and fifty and half my time, I who ardently wished to be a
-journalist and to have leisure for the imitation of our lady George
-Sand! In the end I was hustled into the situation. My cowardice was
-shameful; but in recording it I am not unconscious of the fact that
-truth makes for piquancy.
-
-"I am sorry to say that I shall have to leave you at Christmas, sir."
-
-"Indeed!" exclaimed the lawyer who admired Browning. "How is that?"
-
-"I am going on to the staff of a paper." Perhaps I have never felt
-prouder than when I uttered those words. My pride must have been
-disgusting. This was the last time I ever said "sir" to any man under
-the rank of a knight. The defection of a reliable clerk who combined
-cunning in the preparation of costs with a hundred and thirty words a
-minute at shorthand was decidedly a blow to my excellent; employer; good
-costs clerks are rarer than true poets; but he suffered it with
-impassive stoicism; I liked him for that.
-
-On a New Year's Day I strolled along Piccadilly to the first day's work
-on my paper. "My paper"--O the joyful sound! But the boats were burnt
-up; their ashes were even cool; and my mind, in the midst of all this
-bliss, was vexed by grave apprehensions. Suppose the paper to expire, as
-papers often did! I knew that the existence of this particular paper was
-precarious; its foundations were not fixed in the dark backward and
-abysm of time--it was two years old. Nevertheless, and indisputably and
-solely, I was at last a journalist, and entitled so to describe myself
-in parish registers, county court summonses, jury papers, and income-tax
-returns. In six months I might be a tramp sleeping in Trafalgar Square,
-but on that gorgeous day I was a journalist; nay, I was second in
-command over a cohort of women whose cleverness, I trusted, would be
-surpassed only by their charm.
-
-The office was in the West End--index of smartness; one arrived at ten
-thirty or so, and ascended to the suite in a lift. One smoked cigars and
-cigarettes incessantly. There was no discipline, and no need of
-discipline, since the indoor staff consisted only of the editor, myself,
-and the editor's lady-secretary. The contrast between this and the exact
-ritual of a solicitor's office was marked and delightful. In an
-adjoining suite on the same floor an eminent actress resided, and an
-eminent actor strolled in to us, grandiosely, during the morning,
-accepted a cigar and offered a cigarette (according to his frugal
-custom), chatted grandiosely, and grandiosely departed. Parcels were
-constantly arriving--books, proofs, process-blocks, samples of soap and
-of corsets: this continuous procession of parcels impressed me as much
-as anything. From time to time well-dressed and alert women called, to
-correct proofs, to submit drawings, or to scatter excuses. This was
-"Evadne," who wrote about the toilet; that was "Angélique," who did the
-cookery; the other was "Enid," the well-known fashion artist. In each
-case I was of course introduced as the new assistant-editor; they were
-adorable, without exception. At one o'clock, having apparently done
-little but talk and smoke, we went out, the Editor and I, to lunch at
-the Cri.
-
-"This," I said to myself quite privately, "this may be a novel by
-Balzac, but it is not my notion of journalism."
-
-The doings of the afternoon, however, bore a closer resemblance to my
-notion of journalism. That day happened to be press-day, and I perceived
-that we gradually became very busy. Messenger-boys waited while I wrote
-paragraphs to accompany portraits, or while I regularized the syntax of
-a recipe for sole _à la Normande_, or while I ornamented two naked
-lines from the "Morning Post" with four lines of embroidery. The editor
-was enchanted with my social paragraphs; he said I was born to it, and
-perhaps I was. I innocently asked in what part of the paper they were to
-shine.
-
-"Gwendolen's column," he replied.
-
-"Who is Gwendolen?" I demanded. Weeks before, I had admired Gwendolen's
-breadth of view and worldly grasp of things, qualities rare in a woman.
-
-"You are," he said, "and I am. It's only an office signature."
-
-Now, that was what I called journalism. I had been taken in, but I was
-glad to have been taken in.
-
-At four o'clock he began frantically to dictate the weekly London Letter
-which he contributed to an Indian newspaper; the copy caught the Indian
-mail at six. And this too was what I called journalism. I felt myself to
-be in my element; I lived. At an hour which I forget we departed
-together to the printers, and finished off. It was late when the paper
-"went down." The next morning the lady-secretary handed to me the first
-rough folded "pull" of the issue, and I gazed at it as a mother might
-gaze at her firstborn.
-
-"But is this all?" ran my thoughts. The fact was, I had expected some
-process of initiation. I had looked on "journalism" as a sort of temple
-of mysteries into which, duly impressed, I should be ceremoniously
-guided. I was called assistant-editor for the sake of grandiloquence,
-but of course I knew I was chiefly a mere sub-editor, and I had
-anticipated that the sub-editorial craft would be a complex technical
-business requiring long study and practice. On the contrary, there
-seemed to me to be almost nothing in its technique. The tricks of
-making-up, making-ready, measuring blocks, running-round, cutting,
-saving a line, and so on: my chief assumed in the main that I understood
-all these, and I certainly did grasp them instinctively; they appeared
-childishly simple. Years afterwards, a contributor confided to me that
-the editor had told her that he taught me nothing after the first day,
-and that I was a born journalist. I do not seriously think that I was a
-born journalist, and I mention this detail, not from any vain-glory over
-a trifle, but to show that the _arcana_ of journalism partake of the
-nature of an imposture. The same may be said of all professional
-_arcana_, even those of politics or of the swell-mob.
-
-In a word, I was a journalist--but I felt just the same as before.
-
-I vaguely indicated my feelings on this point to the chief.
-
-"Ah!" he said. "But you know you'd been through the mill before you came
-here."
-
-So I had been through the mill! Writing articles at night and getting
-them back the next morning but one, for a year or two--that was going
-through the mill! Let it be so, then. When other men envied my position,
-and expressed their opinion that I had "got on to a soft thing," I
-indicated that the present was the fruit of the past, and that I had
-been through the mill.
-
-Journalism for women, by women under the direction of men, is an affair
-at once anxious, agreeable and delicate for the men who direct. It is a
-journalism by itself, apart from other journalisms. And it is the only
-journalism that I intimately know. The commercial side of it, the queer
-financial basis of it, have a peculiar interest, but my scheme does not
-by any means include the withdrawal of those curtains. I am concerned
-with letters, and letters, I fear, have little connection with women's
-journalism. I learnt nothing of letters in that office, save a few of
-the more obvious journalistic devices, but I learnt a good deal about
-frocks, household management, and the secret nature of women, especially
-the secret nature of women. As for frocks, I have sincerely tried to
-forget that branch of human knowledge; nevertheless the habit, acquired
-then, of glancing first at a woman's skirt and her shoes, has never left
-me. My apprenticeship to frocks was studded with embarrassing
-situations, of which I will mention only one. It turns upon some designs
-for a layette. A layette, perhaps I ought to explain, is an outfit for a
-new-born babe, and naturally it is prepared in advance of the stranger's
-arrival. Underneath a page of layette illustrations I once put the
-legend, correct in nine hundred and ninety-nine cases out of a
-thousand--but this was the thousandth--_Cut-to-measure patterns
-supplied_. The solecism stands to all eternity against me on the file of
-the paper; and the recollection of it, like the recollection of a
-_gaucherie_, is persistently haunting.
-
-And here I shall quit for a time the feminine atmosphere, and the path
-which I began by calling dusty, but which is better called flowery. My
-activity in that path showed no further development until after I had
-written my first novel.
-
-
-
-
-VII
-
-
-"By heaven!" I said, "I will write a novel!"
-
-And I sat down to my oaken bureau with the air of a man who has resolved
-to commit a stupendous crime. Perhaps indeed it was a crime, this my
-first serious challenge to a neglectful and careless world. At any rate
-it was meant to be the beginning of the end, the end being twofold--fame
-and a thousand a year. You must bear well in mind that I was by no means
-the ordinary person, and my novel was by no means to be the ordinary
-novel. In these cases the very essence of the situation is always that
-one is not ordinary. I had just discovered that I could write--and
-when I use the term "write" here, I use it in a special sense,
-to be appreciated only by those elect who can themselves "write,"
-and difficult of comprehension by all others. I had had a
-_conte_--exquisitely Gallic as to spirit and form--in the "Yellow Book,"
-and that _conte_ had been lauded in the "South Audley Street Gazette" or
-some organ of destructive criticism. My friends believed in Art,
-themselves, and me. I believed in myself, Art, and them. Could any
-factor be lacking to render the scene sublime and historic?
-
-So I sat down to write my first novel, under the sweet influences of the
-de Goncourts, Turgenev, Flaubert, and de Maupassant. It was to be
-entirely unlike all English novels except those of one author, whose
-name I shall not mention now, for the reason that I have afore-time made
-my admiration of that author very public. I clearly remember that the
-purpose uppermost in my mind was to imitate what I may call the physical
-characteristics of French novels. There were to be no poetical
-quotations in my novel, no titles to the chapters; the narrative was to
-be divided irregularly into sections by Roman numerals only; and it was
-indispensable that a certain proportion of these sections should begin
-or end abruptly. As thus, for a beginning:--"Gerald suddenly changed the
-conversation, and taking the final match from his match-box at last
-agreed to light a cigar." And for an ending:--"Her tremulous eyes sought
-his; breathing a sigh she murmured . . ." O succession of dots, charged
-with significance vague but tremendous, there were to be hundreds of you
-in my novel, because you play so important a part in the literature of
-the country of Victor Hugo and M. Loubet! So much for the physical
-characteristics. To come nearer to the soul of it, my novel was to be a
-mosaic consisting exclusively of Flaubert's _mots justes_--it was to be
-_mots justes_ composed into the famous _écriture artiste_ of the de
-Goncourts. The sentences were to perform the trick of "the rise and
-fall." The adjectives were to have colour, the verbs were to have
-colour, and perhaps it was a _sine qua non_ that even the pronouns
-should be prismatic--I forget. And all these effects were to be obtained
-without the most trifling sacrifice of truth. There was to be no bowing
-in the house of the Rimmon of sentimentality. Life being grey, sinister,
-and melancholy, my novel must be grey, sinister, and melancholy. As a
-matter of strict fact, life deserved none of these epithets; I was
-having a very good time; but at twenty-seven one is captious, and liable
-to err in judgment--a liability which fortunately disappears at
-thirty-five or so. No startling events were to occur in my novel, nor
-anything out of the way that might bring the blush of shame to the
-modesty of nature; no ingenious combinations, no dramatic surprises, and
-above all no coincidences. It was to be the Usual miraculously
-transformed by Art into the Sublime.
-
-The sole liberty that I might permit myself in handling the Usual was to
-give it a rhythmic contour--a precious distinction in those Yeller-bocky
-days.
-
-All these cardinal points being settled, I passed to the business of
-choosing a subject. Need I say that I chose myself? But, in obedience to
-my philosophy, I made myself a failure. I regarded my hero with an air
-of "There, but for the grace of God, goes me!" I decided that he should
-go through most of my own experiences, but that instead of fame and a
-thousand a year he should arrive ultimately at disillusion and a
-desolating suburban domesticity. I said I would call my novel "In the
-Shadow," a title suggested to me by the motto of Balzac's "Country
-Doctor"--"For a wounded heart, shadow and silence." It was to be all
-very dolorous, this Odyssey of a London clerk who---- But I must not
-disclose any detail of the plot.
-
-So I sat down, and wrote on a fair quarto sheet, "In the Shadow," and
-under that, "I." It was a religious rite, an august and imposing
-ceremonial; and I was the officiating priest. In the few fleeting
-instants between the tracing of the "I" and the tracing of the first
-word of the narrative, I felt happy and proud; but immediately the
-fundamental brain-work began, I lost nearly all my confidence. With
-every stroke the illusion grew thinner, more remote. I perceived that I
-could not become Flaubert by taking thought, and this rather obvious
-truth rushed over me as a surprise. I knew what I wanted to do, and I
-could not do it. I felt, but I could not express. My sentences would
-persist in being damnably Mudiesque. The _mots justes_ hid themselves
-exasperatingly behind a cloud. The successions of dots looked merely
-fatuous. The charm, the poetry, the distinction, the inevitableness, the
-originality, the force, and the invaluable rhythmic contour--these were
-anywhere save on my page. All writers are familiar with the dreadful
-despair that ensues when a composition, on perusal, obstinately presents
-itself as a series of little systems of words joined by conjunctions and
-so forth, something like this--subject, predicate, object, _but_,
-subject, predicate, object. Pronoun, _however_, predicate, negative,
-infinitive verb. _Nevertheless_, participle, accusative, subject,
-predicate, etc., etc., etc., for evermore. I suffered that despair. The
-proper remedy is to go to the nearest bar and have a drink, or to read a
-bit of "Comus" or "Urn-Burial," but at that time I had no skill in
-weathering anti-cyclones, and I drove forward like a sinking steamer in
-a heavy sea.
-
-And this was what it was, in serious earnest, to be an author! For I
-reckon that in writing the first chapter of my naturalistic novel, I
-formally became an author; I had undergone a certain apprenticeship. I
-didn't feel like an author, no more than I had felt like a journalist on
-a similar occasion. Indeed, far less: I felt like a fool, an incompetent
-ass. I seemed to have an idea that there was no such thing as
-literature, that literature was a mirage, or an effect of hypnotism, or
-a concerted fraud. After all, I thought, what in the name of common
-sense is the use of telling this silly ordinary story of everyday life?
-Where is the point? What _is_ art, anyway, and all this chatter about
-truth to life, and all this rigmarole of canons?
-
-I finished the chapter that night, hurriedly, perfunctorily, and only
-because I had sworn to finish it. Then, in obedience to an instinct
-which all Grub Street has felt, I picked out the correct "Yellow Book"
-from a shelf and read my beautiful story again. That enheartened me a
-little, restored my faith in the existence of art, and suggested the
-comfortable belief that things were not perhaps as bad as they seemed.
-
-"Well, how's the novel getting on?" my friend the wall-paper enthusiast
-inquired jovially at supper.
-
-"Oh, fine!" I said. "It's going to be immense."
-
-Why one should utter these frightful and senseless lies, I cannot guess.
-I might just as well have spoken the precise truth to him, for his was a
-soul designed by providence for the encouragement of others. Still,
-having made that remark, I added in my private ear that either the novel
-must be immense or I must perish in the attempt to make it so.
-
-In six months I had written only about thirty thousand words, and I felt
-the sort of elation that probably succeeds six months on a treadmill.
-But one evening, in the midst of a chapter, a sudden and mysterious
-satisfaction began to warm my inmost being. I knew that chapter was
-good and going to be good. I experienced happiness in the very act of
-work. Emotion and technique were reconciled. It was as if I had
-surprisingly come upon the chart with the blood-red cross showing where
-the Spanish treasure was buried. I dropped my pen, and went out for a
-walk, and decided to give the book an entirely fresh start. I carefully
-read through all that I had written. It was bad, but viewed in the mass
-it produced on me a sort of culminating effect which I had not
-anticipated. Conceive the poor Usual at the bottom of a flight of
-stairs, and the region of the Sublime at the top: it seemed to me that I
-had dragged the haggard thing halfway up, and that it lay there, inert
-but safe, awaiting my second effort. The next night I braced myself to
-this second effort, and I thought that I succeeded.
-
-"We're doing the trick, Charlie," Edmund Kean whispered into the ear of
-his son during a poignant scene of "Brutus." And in the very crisis of
-my emotional chapters, while my hero was rushing fatally to the nether
-greyness of the suburbs and all the world was at its most sinister and
-most melancholy, I said to myself with glee: "We're doing the trick." My
-moods have always been a series of violent contrasts, and I was now just
-as uplifted as I had before been depressed. There were interludes of
-doubt and difficulty, but on the whole I was charmed with my novel. It
-would be a despicable affectation to disguise the fact that I deemed it
-a truly distinguished piece of literature, idiosyncratic, finely
-imaginative, and of rhythmic contour. As I approached the end, my
-self-esteem developed in a _crescendo_. I finished the tale, having
-sentenced my hero to a marriage infallibly disastrous, at three o'clock
-one morning. I had laboured for twelve hours without intermission. It
-was great, this spell; it was histrionic. It was Dumas over again, and
-the roaring French forties.
-
-Nevertheless, to myself I did not yet dare to call myself an artist. I
-lacked the courage to believe that I had the sacred fire, the inborn and
-not-to-be-acquired vision. It seemed impossible that this should be so.
-I have ridiculed the whole artist tribe, and, in the pursuit of my
-vocation, I shall doubtless ridicule them again; but never seriously.
-Nothing is more deeply rooted in me than my reverence for the artistic
-faculty. And whenever I say, "The man's an artist," I say it with an
-instinctive solemnity that so far as I am concerned ends all discussion.
-Dared I utter this great saying to my shaving-mirror? No, I repeat that
-I dared not. More than a year elapsed before the little incident
-described at the commencement of these memoirs provided me with the
-audacity to inform the author of "In the Shadow" that he too belonged to
-the weird tribe of Benjamin.
-
-When my novel had been typewritten and I read it in cold blood, I was
-absolutely unable to decide whether it was very good, good, medium, bad,
-or very bad. I could not criticize it. All I knew was that certain
-sentences, in the vein of the _écriture artiste_, persisted beautifully
-in my mind, like fine lines from a favourite poet. I loosed the brave
-poor thing into the world over a post-office counter. "What chance _has_
-it, in the fray?" I exclaimed. My novel had become nothing but a parcel.
-Thus it went in search of its fate.
-
-I have described the composition of my first book in detail as realistic
-as I can make it, partly because a few years ago the leading novelists
-of the day seemed to enter into a conspiracy to sentimentalize the
-first book episode in their brilliant careers.
-
-
-
-
-VIII
-
-
-"Will you step this way?" said the publisher's manager, and after
-coasting by many shelves loaded with scores of copies of the same book
-laid flat in piles--to an author the most depressing sight in the
-world--I was ushered into the sanctum, the star-chamber, the den, the
-web of the spider.
-
-I beheld the publisher, whose name is a household word wherever the
-English language is written for posterity. Even at that time his imprint
-flamed on the title-pages of one or two works of a deathless nature. My
-manuscript lay on an occasional table by his side, and I had the curious
-illusion that he was posing for his photograph with my manuscript. As I
-glanced at it I could not help thinking that its presence there bordered
-on the miraculous. I had parted with it at a post-office. It had been
-stamped, sorted, chucked into a van, whirled through the perilous
-traffic of London's centre, chucked out of a van, sorted again, and
-delivered with many other similar parcels at the publisher's. The
-publisher had said: "Send this to So-and-so to read." Then more perils
-by road and rail, more risks of extinction and disorientation. Then
-So-and-so, probably a curt man, with a palate cloyed by the sickliness
-of many manuscripts, and a short way with new authors, had read it or
-pretended to read it. Then finally the third ordeal of locomotion. And
-there it was, I saw it once more, safe!
-
-We discussed the weather and new reputations. I was nervous, and I think
-the publisher was nervous, too. At length, in a manner mysterious and
-inexplicable, the talk shifted to my manuscript. The publisher permitted
-himself a few compliments of the guarded sort.
-
-"But there's no money in it, you know," he said.
-
-"I suppose not," I assented. ("You are an ass for assenting to that," I
-said to myself.)
-
-"I invariably lose money over new authors," he remarked, as if I was to
-blame.
-
-"You didn't lose much over Mrs.----," I replied, naming one of his
-notorious successes.
-
-"Oh, _well_!" he said, "of course----. But I didn't make so much as you
-think, perhaps. Publishing is a very funny business." And then he added:
-"Do you think your novel will succeed like Mrs.----'s?"
-
-I said that I hoped it would.
-
-"I'll be perfectly frank with you," the publisher exclaimed, smiling
-beneficently. "My reader likes your book. I'll tell you what he says."
-He took a sheet of paper that lay on the top of the manuscript and read.
-
-I was enchanted, spell-bound. The nameless literary adviser used phrases
-of which the following are specimens (I am recording with exactitude):
-"Written with great knowledge and a good deal of insight." "Character
-delineated by a succession of rare and subtle touches." "Living,
-convincing." "Vigour and accuracy." "The style is good."
-
-I had no idea that publishers' readers were capable of such laudation.
-
-The publisher read on: "I do not think it likely to be a striking
-success!"
-
-"Oh!" I murmured, shocked by this bluntness.
-
-"There's no money in it," the publisher repeated, firmly. "First books
-are too risky. . . . I should like to publish it."
-
-"Well?" I said, and paused. I felt that he had withdrawn within himself
-in order to ponder upon the chances of this terrible risk. So as not to
-incommode him with my gaze, I examined the office, which resembled a
-small drawing-room rather than an office. I saw around me signed
-portraits of all the roaring lions on the sunny side of Grub Street.
-
-"I'll publish it," said the publisher, and I believe he made an honest
-attempt not to look like a philanthropist; however, the attempt failed.
-"I'll publish it. But of course I can only give you a small royalty."
-
-"What royalty?" I asked.
-
-"Five per cent.--on a three-and-six-penny book."
-
-"Very well. Thank you!" I said.
-
-"I'll give you fifteen per cent, after the sale of five thousand
-copies," he added kindly.
-
-O ironist!
-
-I emerged from the web of the spider triumphant, an accepted author.
-Exactly ten days had elapsed since I had first parted with my
-manuscript. Once again life was plagiarizing fiction. I could not
-believe that this thing was true. I simply could not believe it. "Oh!" I
-reflected, incredulous, "Something's bound to happen. It can't really
-come off. The publisher might die, and then----"
-
-Protected by heaven on account of his good deeds, the publisher
-felicitously survived; and after a delay of twelve months (twelve
-centuries--during which I imagined that the universe hung motionless and
-expectant in the void!) he accomplished his destiny by really and truly
-publishing my book.
-
-The impossible had occurred. I was no longer a mere journalist; I was an
-author.
-
-"After all, it's nothing!" I said, with that intense and unoriginal
-humanity which distinguishes all of us. And in a blinding flash I saw
-that an author was in essence the same thing as a grocer or a duke.
-
-
-
-
-IX
-
-
-My novel, under a new title, was published both in England and America.
-I actually collected forty-one reviews, of it, and there must have been
-many that escaped me. Of these forty-one, four were unfavourable, eleven
-mingled praise and blame in about equal proportions, and twenty-six were
-unmistakably favourable, a few of them being enthusiastic.
-
-Yet I had practically no friends on the press. One friend I had, a man
-of power, and he reviewed my book with an appreciation far too kind; but
-his article came as a complete surprise to me. Another friend I had,
-sub-editor of a society weekly, and he asked me for a copy of my book so
-that he might "look after it" in the paper. Here is part of the result:
-
-"He has all the young novelist's faults. . . . These are glaring faults;
-for, given lack of interest, and unpleasant scenes, how can a book be
-expected to be popular?"
-
-A third friend I had, who knew the chief fiction-reviewer on a great
-morning paper. He asked me for a special copy of my book, and quite on
-his own initiative, undertook to arrange the affair. Here is part of the
-result:
-
-"There is not much to be said either for or against---- by Mr.----"
-
-I had no other friends on the press, or friends who had friends on the
-press.
-
-I might easily butcher the reviews for your amusement, but this practice
-is becoming trite. I will quote a single sentence which pleased me as
-much as any:--"What our hero's fate was let those who care to know find
-out, but let us assure them that in its discovery they will read of
-London life and labour as it is, not as the bulk of romances paint it."
-All the principal organs were surprisingly appreciative. And the
-majority of the reviewers agreed that my knowledge of human nature was
-exceptionally good, that my style was exceptionally good, that I had in
-me the makings of a novelist, and that my present subject was weak. My
-subject was not weak; but let that pass. When I reflect how my book
-flouted the accepted canons of English fiction, and how many aspects of
-it must have annoyed nine reviewers out of ten, I am compelled to the
-conclusion that reviewers are a very good-natured class of persons. I
-shall return to this interesting point later--after I have described how
-I became a reviewer myself. The fact to be asserted is that I, quite
-obscure and defenceless, was treated very well. I could afford to smile
-from a high latitude at the remark of "The New York----" that "the story
-and characters are commonplace in the extreme." I felt that I had not
-lived in vain, and that kindred spirits were abroad in the land.
-
-My profits from this book with the exceptional style and the exceptional
-knowledge of human nature, exceeded the cost of having it typewritten by
-the sum of one sovereign. Nor was I, nor am I, disposed to grumble at
-this. Many a first book has cost its author a hundred pounds. I got a
-new hat out of mine.
-
-What I did grumble at was the dishonour of the prophet in his own
-county. Here I must delicately recall that my novel was naturalistic,
-and that it described the career of a young man alone in London. It had
-no "realism" in the vulgar sense, as several critics admitted, but still
-it was desperately exact in places, and I never surrounded the head of a
-spade with the aureole of a sentimental implement. The organ of a great
-seaport remarked: "We do not consider the book a healthy one. We say no
-more." Now you must imagine this excessively modern novel put before a
-set of estimable people whose ideas on fiction had been formed under the
-influence of Dickens and Mrs. Henry Wood, and who had never changed
-those ideas. Some of them, perhaps, had not read a novel for ten years
-before they read mine. The result was appalling, frightful, tragical.
-For months I hesitated to visit the town which had the foresight to bear
-me, and which is going to be famous on that score. I was castigated in
-the local paper. My nearest and dearest played nervously with their
-bread when my novel was mentioned at dinner. A relative in a distant
-continent troubled himself to inform me that the book was fragmentary
-and absolutely worthless. The broader-minded merely wished that I had
-never written the book. The discreet received it in silence. One
-innocent person, for whom I have the warmest regard, thought that my
-novel might be a suitable birthday present for his adolescent son. By
-chance he perused the book himself on the birthday eve. I was told that
-neither on that night nor on the next did he get a wink of sleep. His
-adolescent son certainly never got my book.
-
-Most authors, I have learnt on enquiry, have to suffer from this strange
-lack of appreciation in the very circle where appreciation should be
-kindest; if one fault isn't found, another is; but they draw a veil
-across that dark aspect of the bright auctorial career. I, however, am
-trying to do without veils, and hence I refer to the matter.
-
-
-
-
-X
-
-
-My chief resigned his position on the paper with intent to enliven other
-spheres of activity. The news of his resignation was a blow to me. It
-often happens that when an editor walks out of an office in the exercise
-of free-will, the staff follows him under compulsion. In Fleet Street
-there is no security of tenure unless one is ingenious enough to be the
-proprietor of one's paper.
-
-"I shall never get on with any one as I have got on with you," I said to
-the chief.
-
-"You needn't," he answered. "I'm sure they'll have the sense to give you
-my place if you ask for it." "They" were a board of directors.
-
-And they had the sense; they even had the sense not to wait until I
-asked. I have before remarked that the thumb of my Fate has always been
-turned up. Still on the glorious side of thirty, still young,
-enthusiastic, and a prey to delightful illusions, I suddenly found
-myself the editor of a London weekly paper. It was not a leading organ,
-but it was a London weekly paper, and it had pretensions; at least I
-had. My name was inscribed in various annuals of reference. I dined as
-an editor with other editors. I remember one day sitting down to table
-in a populous haunt of journalists with no less than four editors.
-"Three years ago," I said to myself, "I should have deemed this an
-impossible fairy tale." I know now that there are hundreds of persons in
-London and elsewhere who regard even editors with gentle and
-condescending toleration. One learns.
-
-I needed a sub-editor, and my first act was to acquire one. I had the
-whole world of struggling lady-journalists to select from: to choose was
-an almost sublime function. For some months previously we had been
-receiving paragraphs and articles from an outside contributor whose
-_flair_ in the discovery of subjects, whose direct simplicity of style
-and general tidiness of "copy," had always impressed me. I had never
-seen her, and I knew nothing about her; but I decided that, if she
-pleased, this lady should be my sub-editor. I wrote desiring her to
-call, and she called. Without much preface I offered her the situation;
-she accepted it.
-
-"Who recommended me to you?" she asked.
-
-"No one," I replied, in the rôle of Joseph Pulitzer; "I liked your
-stuff."
-
-It was a romantic scene. I mention it because I derived a child-like
-enjoyment from that morning. Vanity was mixed up in it; but I argued--If
-you are an editor, be an editor imaginatively. I seemed to resemble
-Louis the Fifteenth beginning to reign after the death of the Regent,
-but with no troublesome Fleury in the background.
-
-"Now," I cried, "up goes the circulation!"
-
-But circulations are not to be bullied into ascension. They will only
-rise on the pinions of a carefully constructed policy. I thought I knew
-all about journalism for women, and I found that I knew scarcely the
-fringe of it. A man may be a sub-editor, or even an assistant-editor,
-for half a lifetime, and yet remain ignorant of the true significance of
-journalism. Those first months were months of experience in a very
-poignant sense. The proprietary desired certain modifications in the
-existing policy. O that mysterious "policy," which has to be created and
-built up out of articles, paragraphs, and pictures! That
-thrice-mysterious "public taste" which has to be aimed at in the dark
-and hit! I soon learnt the difference between legislature and executive.
-I could "execute" anything, from a eulogy of a philanthropic duchess to
-a Paris fashion letter. I could instruct a fashion-artist as though I
-knew what I was talking about. I could play Blucher at the Waterloo of
-the advertisement-manager. I could interview a beauty and make her say
-the things that a beauty must say in an interview. But to devise the
-contents of an issue, to plan them, to balance them; to sail with this
-wind and tack against that; to keep a sensitive cool finger on the
-faintly beating pulse of the terrible many-headed patron; to walk in a
-straight line through a forest black as midnight; to guess the riddle of
-the circulation-book week by week; to know by instinct why Smiths sent
-in a repeat-order, or why Simpkins' was ten quires less; to keep one eye
-on the majestic march of the world, and the other on the vagaries of a
-bazaar-reporter who has forgotten the law of libel: these things, and
-seventy-seven others, are the real journalism. It is these things that
-make editors sardonic, grey, unapproachable.
-
-Unique among all suspenses is the suspense that occupies the editorial
-mind between the moment of finally going to press and the moment of
-examining the issue on the morning of publication. Errors, appalling and
-disastrous errors, will creep in; and they are irremediable then. These
-mishaps occur to the most exalted papers, to all papers, except perhaps
-the "Voce della Verità," which, being the organ of the Pope, is
-presumably infallible. Tales circulate in Fleet Street that make the
-hair stand on end; and every editor says: "This might have happened to
-_me_." Subtle beyond all subtleties is the magic and sinister change that
-happens to your issue in the machine-room at the printers. You pass the
-final page and all seems fair, attractive, clever, well-designed. . . . Ah!
-But what you see is not what is on the paper; it is the
-reflection of the bright image in your mind of what you intended! When
-the last thousand is printed and the parcels are in the vans, then you
-gaze at the unalterable thing, and you see it coldly as it actually is.
-You see not what you intended, but what you have accomplished. And the
-difference! It is like the chill, steely dawn after the vague poetry of
-a moonlit night.
-
-There is no peace for an editor. He may act the farce of taking a
-holiday, but the worm of apprehension is always gnawing at the root of
-pleasure. I once put my organ to bed and went off by a late train in a
-perfect delirium of joyous anticipation of my holiday. I was recalled by
-a telegram that a fire with a strong sense of ironic humour had burnt
-the printing office to the ground and destroyed five-sixths of my entire
-issue. In such crises something has to be done, and done quickly. You
-cannot say to your public next week: "Kindly excuse the absence of the
-last number, as there was a fire at the printers." Your public recks not
-of fires, no more than the General Post Office, in its attitude towards
-late clerks, recognizes the existence of fogs in winter. And herein
-lies, for the true journalist, one of the principal charms of Fleet
-Street. Herein lies the reason why an editor's life is at once
-insufferable and worth living. There are no excuses. Every one knows
-that if the crater of Highgate Hill were to burst and bury London in
-lava to-morrow, the newspapers would show no trace of the disaster
-except an account of it. That thought is fine, heroic, when an editor
-thinks of it.
-
-And if an editor knows not peace, he knows power. In Fleet Street, as in
-other streets, the population divides itself into those who want
-something and those who have something to bestow; those who are anxious
-to give a lunch, and those who deign occasionally to accept a lunch;
-those who have an axe to grind and those who possess the grindstone. The
-change from the one position to the other was for me at first rather
-disconcerting; I could not understand it; there was an apparent
-unreality about it; I thought I must be mistaken; I said to myself:
-"Surely this unusual ingratiating affability has nothing to do with the
-accident that I am an editor." Then, like the rest of the owners of
-grindstones, I grew accustomed to the ownership, and cynical withal,
-cold, suspicious, and forbidding. I became bored by the excessive
-complaisance that had once tickled and flattered me. (Nevertheless,
-after I had ceased to be an editor I missed it; involuntarily I
-continued to expect it.) The situation of the editor of a ladies' paper
-is piquantly complicated, in this respect, by the fact that some women,
-not many--but a few, have an extraordinary belief in, and make
-unscrupulous use of, their feminine fascinations. The art of being "nice
-to editors" is diligently practised by these few; often, I know, with
-brilliant results. Sometimes I have sat in my office, with the charmer
-opposite, and sardonically reflected: "You think I am revolving round
-your little finger, madam, but you were never more mistaken in your
-life." And yet, breathes there the man with soul so uniformly cold that
-once or twice in such circumstances the woman was not right after all? I
-cannot tell. The whole subject, the subject of that strange, disturbing,
-distracting, emotional atmosphere of femininity which surrounds the male
-in command of a group of more or less talented women, is of a supreme
-delicacy. It could only be treated safely in a novel--one of the novels
-which it is my fixed intention never to write. This I know and affirm,
-that the average woman-journalist is the most loyal, earnest, and
-teachable person under the sun. I begin to feel sentimental when I think
-of her astounding earnestness, even in grasping the live coal of English
-syntax. Syntax, bane of writing-women, I have spent scores of
-ineffectual hours in trying to inoculate the ungrammatical sex against
-your terrors! And how seriously they frowned, and how seriously I
-talked; and all the while the eternal mystery of the origin and destiny
-of all life lay thick and unnoticed about us!
-
-These syntax-sittings led indirectly to a new development of my
-activities. One day a man called on me with a letter of introduction. He
-was a colonial of literary tastes. I asked in what manner I might serve
-him.
-
-"I want to know whether you would care to teach me journalism," he said.
-
-"Teach you journalism!" I echoed, wondering by what unperceived alchemy
-I myself, but yesterday a tyro, had been metamorphosed into a professor
-of the most comprehensive of all crafts.
-
-"I am told you are the best person to come to," he said.
-
-"Why not?" I thought. "Why shouldn't I?" I have never refused work when
-the pay has been good. I named a fee that might have frightened him, but
-it did not. And so it fell out that I taught journalism to him, and to
-others, for a year or two. This vocation suited me; I had an aptitude
-for it; and my fame spread abroad. Some of the greatest experts in
-London complimented me on my methods and my results. Other and more
-ambitious schemes, however, induced me to abandon this lucrative field,
-which was threatening to grow tiresome.
-
-
-
-
-XI
-
-
-I come now to a question only less delicate than that of the conflict of
-sexes in journalism--the question of reviewing, which, however, I shall
-treat with more freedom. If I have an aptitude for anything at all in
-letters, it is for criticism. Whenever I read a work of imagination, I
-am instantly filled with ideas concerning it; I form definite views
-about its merit or demerit, and having formed them, I hold those views
-with strong conviction. Denial of them rouses me; I must thump the table
-in support of them; I must compel people to believe that what I say is
-true; I cannot argue without getting serious in spite of myself. In
-literature, but in nothing else, I am a propagandist; I am not content
-to keep my opinion and let others keep theirs. To have a worthless book
-in my house (save in the way of business), to know that any friend of
-mine is enjoying it, actually distresses me. That book must go, the
-pretensions of that book must be exposed, if I am to enjoy peace of
-mind. Some may suspect that I am guilty here of the affectation of a
-pose. Really it is not so. I often say to myself, after the heat of an
-argument, a denunciation, or a defence: "What does it matter, fool? The
-great mundane movement will continue, the terrestrial ball will roll
-on." But will it? Something must matter, after all, or the mundane
-movement emphatically would not continue. And the triumph of a good
-book, and the ignominy of a bad book, matter to me.
-
-The criticism of imaginative prose literature, which is my speciality,
-is an over-crowded and not very remunerative field of activity. Every
-intelligent mediocrity in Fleet Street thinks he can appraise a novel,
-and most of them, judging from the papers, seem to make the attempt. And
-so quite naturally the pay is as a rule contemptible. To enter this
-field, therefore, with the intention of tilling it to a profitable
-fiscal harvest is an enterprise in the nature of a forlorn hope. I
-undertook it in innocence and high spirits, from a profound instinct. I
-had something to say. Of late years I have come to the conclusion that
-the chief characteristic of all bad reviewing is the absence of genuine
-conviction, of a message, of a clear doctrine; the incompetent reviewer
-has to invent his opinions.
-
-I succeeded at first by dint of ignoring one of the elementary laws of
-journalism, to-wit, that editors do not accept reviews from casual
-outsiders. I wrote a short review of a French work and sent it to "The
-Illustrated London News," always distinguished for its sound literary
-criticism. Any expert would have told me that I was wasting labour and
-postage. Nevertheless the review was accepted, printed, and handsomely
-paid for. I then sent a review of a new edition of Edward Carpenter's
-"Towards Democracy" to an evening paper, and this, too, achieved
-publicity. After that, for some months, I made no progress. And then I
-had the chance of a literary _causerie_ in a weekly paper: eight hundred
-words a week, thirty pounds a year. I wrote a sample article--and I well
-remember the incredible pains I took to show that Mrs. Lynn Linton's "In
-Haste and at Leisure" was thoroughly bad--but my article was too
-"literary." The editor with thirty pounds a year to spend on literary
-criticism went in search of a confection less austere than mine. But I
-was not baulked for long. The literary column of my own paper (of which
-I was then only assistant-editor) was presented to me on my assurance
-that I could liven it up: seven hundred words a week, at twelve and
-sixpence. The stuff that I wrote was entirely unsuited to the taste of
-our public; but it attracted attention from the seats of the mighty, and
-it also attracted--final triumph of the despised reviewer!--publishers'
-advertisements. I wrote this column every week for some years. And I got
-another one to do, by asking for it. Then I selected some of my best and
-wittiest reviews, and sent them to the editor of a well-known organ of
-culture with a note suggesting that my pen ought to add to the charms of
-his paper. An editor of sagacity and perspicacity, he admitted the
-soundness of my suggestion without cavil, and the result was mutually
-satisfactory. At the present time.[2] I am continually refusing critical
-work. I reckon that on an average I review a book and a fraction of a
-book every day of my life, Sundays included.
-
-"Then," says the man in the street inevitably, "you must spend a very
-large part of each day in reading new books." Not so. I fit my reviewing
-into the odd unoccupied corners of my time, the main portions of which
-are given to the manufacture of novels, plays, short stories, and longer
-literary essays. I am an author of several sorts. I have various strings
-to my bow. And I know my business. I write half a million words a year.
-That is not excessive; but it is passable industry, and nowadays I make
-a point of not working too hard. The half million words contain one or
-two books, one or two plays, and numerous trifles not connected with
-literary criticism; only about a hundred and fifty thousand words are
-left for reviewing.
-
-The sense of justice of the man in the street is revolted. "You do not
-read through all the books that you pretend to criticize?" he hints. I
-have never known a reviewer to answer this insinuation straightforwardly
-in print, but I will answer it: No, I do not.
-
-And the man in the street says, shocked: "You are unjust."
-
-And I reply: "Not at all. I am merely an expert."
-
-The performances of the expert in any craft will surprise and amaze the
-inexpert. Come with me into my study and I will surprise and amaze you.
-Have I been handling novels for bread-and-cheese all these years and not
-learnt to judge them by any process quicker than that employed by you
-who merely pick up a novel for relaxation after dinner? Assuming that
-your taste is fairly sound, let us be confronted with the same new
-novel, and I will show you, though you are a quick reader, that I can
-anticipate your judgment of that novel by a minimum of fifty-five
-minutes. The title-page--that conjunction of the title, the name of the
-author, and the name of the publisher--speaks to me, telling me all
-sorts of things. The very chapter-headings deliver a message of style.
-The narrative everywhere discloses to me the merits and defects of the
-writer; no author ever lived who could write a page without giving
-himself away. The whole book, open it where I will, is murmurous with
-indications for me. In the case of nine books of ten, to read them
-through would be not a work of supererogation--it would be a sinful
-waste of time on the part of a professional reviewer. The majority of
-novels--and all these remarks apply only to novels--hold no surprise for
-the professional reviewer. He can foretell them as the nautical almanac
-foretells astronomical phenomena. The customary established popular
-author seldom or never deviates from his appointed track, and it is the
-customary established popular author upon whom chiefly the reviewer is a
-parasite. New authors occasionally cause the reviewer to hesitate in his
-swift verdicts, especially when the verdict is inclined to be
-favourable. Certain publishers (that is to say, their "readers") have a
-knack of acquiring new authors who can imitate real excellence in an
-astonishing manner. In some cases the reviewer must needs deliberately
-"get into" the book, in order not to be deceived by appearances, in
-order to decide positively whether the author has genuine imaginative
-power, and if so, whether that power is capable of a sustained effort.
-But these difficult instances are rare. There remains the work of the
-true artist, the work that the reviewer himself admires and enjoys: say
-one book in fifty, or one in a hundred. The reviewer reads that through.
-
-Brief reflection will convince any one that it would be economically
-impossible for the reviewer to fulfil this extraordinary behest of the
-man of the street to read every book through. Take your London morning
-paper, and observe the column devoted to fiction of the day. It
-comprises some fifteen hundred words, and the reviewer receives, if he
-is well paid, three guineas for it. Five novels are discussed. Those
-novels will amount to sixteen hundred pages of printed matter. Reading
-at the rate of eight words a second, the reviewer would accomplish two
-pages a minute, and sixteen hundred pages in thirteen hours and twenty
-minutes. Add an hour and forty minutes for the composition, and we have
-fifteen hours, or two days' work. Do you imagine that the reviewer of a
-London morning paper is going to hire out his immortal soul, his
-experience, his mere skill, at the rate of thirty-one and sixpence per
-day on irregular jobs? Scarcely. He will earn his three guineas inside
-three hours, and it will be well and truly earned. As a journeyman
-author, with the ability and inclination to turn my pen in any direction
-at request, I long ago established a rule never to work for less than
-ten shillings an hour on piecework. If an editor commissioned an
-article, he received from me as much fundamental brain-power and as much
-time as the article demanded--up to the limit of his pay in terms of
-hours at ten shillings apiece. But each year I raise my price per hour.
-Of course, when I am working on my own initiative, for the sole
-advancement of my artistic reputation, I ignore finance and think of
-glory alone. It cannot, however, be too dearly understood that the
-professional author, the man who depends entirely on his pen for the
-continuance of breath, and whose income is at the mercy of an illness or
-a headache, is eternally compromising between glory and something more
-edible and warmer at nights. He labours in the first place for food,
-shelter, tailors, a woman, European travel, horses, stalls at the opera,
-good cigars, ambrosial evenings in restaurants; and he gives glory the
-best chance he can. I am not speaking of geniuses with a mania for
-posterity; I am speaking of human beings.
-
-To return and to conclude this chapter. I feel convinced--nay, I
-know--that on the whole novelists get a little more than justice at the
-hands of their critics. I can recall many instances in which my praise
-has, in the light of further consideration, exceeded the deserts of a
-book; but very, very few in which I have cast a slur on genuine merit.
-Critics usually display a tendency towards a too generous kindness,
-particularly Scottish reviewers; it is almost a rule of the vocation.
-Most authors, I think, recognize this pleasing fact. It is only the
-minority, rabid for everlasting laudation, who carp; and, carping,
-demand the scalps of multiple-reviewers as a terrible example and
-warning to the smaller fry.
-
-
-[Footnote 2: 1900.]
-
-
-
-
-XII
-
-
-Serial fiction is sold and bought just like any other fancy goods. It
-has its wholesale houses, its commercial travellers--even its trusts and
-"corners." An editor may for some reason desire the work of a particular
-author; he may dangle gold before that author or that author's agent;
-but if a corner has been established he will be met by polite regrets
-and the information that Mr. So-and-So, or the Such-and-Such Syndicate,
-is the proper quarter to apply to; then the editor is aware that he will
-get what he wants solely by one method of payment--through the nose. A
-considerable part of the fiction business is in the hand of a few large
-syndicates--syndicates in name only, and middlemen in fact. They perform
-a useful function. They will sell to the editor the entire rights of a
-serial, or they will sell him the rights for a particular district--the
-London district, the Manchester district, the John-o'-Groats
-district--the price varying in direct ratio with the size of the
-district. Many London papers are content to buy the London rights only
-of a serial, or to buy the English rights as distinct from the Scottish
-rights, or to buy the entire rights minus the rights of one or two large
-provincial districts. Thus a serial may make its original appearance in
-London only; or it may appear simultaneously in London and Manchester
-only, or in London only in England and throughout Scotland, or in fifty
-places at once in England and Scotland. And after a serial has appeared
-for the first time and run its course, the weeklies of small and obscure
-towns, the proud organs of all the little Pedlingtons, buy for a trifle
-the right to reprint it. The serials of some authors survive in this
-manner for years in the remote provinces; pick up the local sheet in a
-country inn, and you may perhaps shudder again over the excitations of a
-serial that you read in book form in the far-off nineties. So, all
-editorial purses are suited, the syndicates reap much profit, and they
-are in a position to pay their authors, both tame and wild, a just
-emolument; upon occasion they can even be generous to the verge of an
-imprudence.
-
-When I was an editor, I found it convenient, economical, and
-satisfactory to buy all my fiction from a large and powerful syndicate.
-I got important "names," the names that one sees on the title-pages of
-railway novels, at a moderate price, and it was nothing to me that my
-serial was appearing also in Killicrankie, the Knockmilly-down
-Mountains, or the Scilly Isles. The representative of the syndicate, a
-man clothed with authority, called regularly; he displayed his dainty
-novelties, his leading lines, his old favourites, his rising stars, his
-dark horses, and his dead bargains; I turned them over, like a woman on
-remnant-day at a draper's; and after the inevitable Oriental chaffering,
-we came to terms. I bought Christmas stories in March, and seaside
-fiction in December, and good solid Baring-Gould or Le Queux or L.T.
-Meade all the year round.
-
-Excellently as these ingenious narrative confections served their
-purpose, I dreamed of something better. And in my dream a sudden and
-beautiful thought accosted me: Why should all the buying be on one side?
-
-And the next time the representative of the syndicate called upon me, I
-met his overtures with another.
-
-"Why should all the buying be on one side?" I said. "You know I am an
-author." I added that if he had not seen any of my books, I must send
-him copies. They were exquisitely different from his wares, but I said
-nothing about that.
-
-"Ah!" he parried firmly. "We never buy serials from editors."
-
-I perceived that I was by no means the first astute editor who had tried
-to mingle one sort of business with another. Still it was plain to me
-that my good friend was finding it a little difficult to combine the
-affability of a seller with the lofty disinclination of one who is
-requested to buy in a crowded market.
-
-"I should have thought," I remarked, with a diplomatic touch of
-annoyance, "that you would buy wherever you could get good stuff."
-
-"Oh, yes," he said, "of course we do. But----"
-
-"Well," I continued, "I am writing a serial, and I can tell you it will
-be a good one. I merely mention it to you. If you don't care for it, I
-fancy I can discover some one who will."
-
-Then, having caused to float between us, cloud-like, the significance of
-the indisputable fact that there were other syndicates in the world, I
-proceeded nonchalantly to the matter of his visit and gave him a good
-order. He was an able merchant, but I had not moved in legal circles for
-nothing. Business is business: and he as well as I knew that arbitrary
-rules to the exclusion of editors must give way before this great and
-sublime truth, the foundation of England's glory.
-
-The next thing was to concoct the serial. I had entered into a compact
-with myself that I would never "write down" to the public in a long
-fiction. I was almost bound to pander to the vulgar taste, or at any
-rate to a taste not refined, in my editing, in my articles, and in my
-short stories, but I had sworn solemnly that I would keep the novel-form
-unsullied for the pure exercise of the artist in me. What became of this
-high compact? I merely ignored it. I tore it up and it was forgotten,
-the instant I saw a chance of earning the money of shame. I devised
-excuses, of course. I said that my drawing-room wanted new furniture; I
-said that I might lift the sensational serial to a higher place, thus
-serving the cause of art; I said--I don't know what I said, all to my
-conscience. But I began the serial.
-
-As an editor, I knew the qualities that a serial ought to possess. And I
-knew specially that what most serials lacked was a large, central,
-unifying, vivifying idea. I was very fortunate in lighting upon such an
-idea for my first serial. There are no original themes; probably no
-writer ever did invent an original theme; but my theme was a brilliant
-imposture of originality. It had, too, grandeur and passion, and
-fantasy, and it was inimical to none of the prejudices of the serial
-reader. In truth it was a theme worthy of much better treatment than I
-accorded to it. Throughout the composition of the tale, until nearly the
-end, I had the uneasy feeling, familiar to all writers, that I was
-frittering away a really good thing. But as the climax approached, the
-situa-took hold of me, and in spite of myself I wrote my best. The tale
-was divided into twelve instalments of five thousand words each, and I
-composed it in twenty-four half-days. Each morning, as I walked down the
-Thames Embankment, I contrived a chapter of two thousand five hundred
-words, and each afternoon I wrote the chapter. An instinctive sense of
-form helped me to plan the events into an imposing shape, and it needed
-no abnormal inventive faculty to provide a thrill for the conclusion of
-each section. Further, I was careful to begin the story on the first
-page, without preliminaries, and to finish it abruptly when it was
-finished. For the rest, I put in generous quantities of wealth, luxury,
-feminine beauty, surprise, catastrophe, and genial, incurable optimism.
-I was as satisfied with the result as I had been with the famous poem on
-Courage. I felt sure that the syndicate had never supplied me with a
-sensational serial half as good as mine, and I could conceive no plea
-upon which they would be justified in refusing mine.
-
-They bought it. We had a difference concerning the price. They offered
-sixty pounds; I thought I might as well as not try to get a hundred, but
-when I had lifted them up to seventy-five, the force of bluff would no
-further go, and the bargain was closed. I saw that by writing serials I
-could earn three guineas per half-day; I saw myself embarking upon a
-life of what Ebenezer Jones called "sensation and event"; I saw my
-prices increasing, even to three hundred pounds for a sixty thousand
-word yarn--my imagination stopped there.
-
-The lingering remains of an artistic conscience prompted me to sign this
-eye-smiting work with a pseudonym. The syndicate, since my name was
-quite unknown in their world, made no objection, and I invented several
-aliases, none of which they liked. Then a friend presented me with a
-gorgeous pseudonym--"Sampson Death." Surely, I thought, the syndicate
-will appreciate the subtle power of that! But no! They averred that
-their readers would be depressed by Sampson Death at the head of every
-instalment.
-
-"Why not sign your own name?" they suggested.
-
-And I signed my own name. I, apprentice of Flaubert et Cie., stood forth
-to the universe as a sensation-monger.
-
-The syndicate stated that they would like to have the refusal of another
-serial from my pen.
-
-In correcting the proofs of the first one, I perceived all the
-opportunities I had missed in it, and I had visions of a sensational
-serial absolutely sublime in those qualities that should characterize a
-sensational serial. I knew all about Eugène Sue, and something about
-Wilkie Collins; but my ecstatic contemplation of an ideal serial soared
-far beyond these. I imagined a serial decked with the profuse ornament
-of an Eastern princess, a serial at once grandiose and witty, at once
-modern and transcendental, a serial of which the interest should
-gradually close on the reader like a vice until it became intolerable. I
-saw the whole of London preoccupied with this serial instead of with
-cricket and politics. I heard the dandiacal City youths discussing in
-first-class compartments on the Underground what would happen next in
-it. I witnessed a riot in Fleet Street because I had, accidentally on
-purpose, delayed my copy for twenty-four hours, and the editor of the
-"Daily----" had been compelled to come out with an apology. Lastly, I
-heard the sigh of relief exhaled to heaven by a whole people, when in
-the final instalment I solved the mystery, untied the knot, relieved the
-cruel suspense.
-
-Suck was my dream--a dream that I never realized, but which I believe to
-be capable of realization. It is decades since even a second-class
-imaginative genius devoted itself entirely to the cult of the literary
-_frisson_. Sue excited a nation by admirable sensationalism. The feat
-might be accomplished again, and in this era so prolific in Napoleons of
-the press, it seems strange that no Napoleon has been able to organize
-the sensational serial on a Napoleonic scale.
-
-I did not realize my dream, but I was inspired by it. Once more I
-received from the gods a plot scintillating with possibilities. It was
-less fine than the previous one; it was of the earth earthly; but it
-began with a scene quite unique in the annals of syndicates, and by this
-time I knew a little better how to keep the fire burning. I lavished wit
-and style on the thing, and there is no material splendour of modern
-life that I left out. I plunged into it with all my energy and
-enthusiasm, and wrote the fifteen instalments in fifteen days; I tried
-to feel as much like Dumas _père_ as I could. But when I had done I
-felt, physically, rather more like the fragile Shelley or some wan
-curate than Dumas. I was a wreck.
-
-The syndicate were willing to buy this serial, but they offered me no
-increase of rates. I declined to accept the old terms, and then the
-syndicate invited me to lunch. I made one of the greatest financial
-mistakes of my life on that accurst day, and my only excuse is that I
-was unaccustomed to being invited out to lunch by syndicates. I ought to
-have known, with all my boasted knowledge of the world of business, that
-syndicates do not invite almost unknown authors to lunch without
-excellent reason. I had refused the syndicate's offer, and the syndicate
-asked me to name a price for the entire rights of my tale. I named a
-price; it was a good price for me, then; but the words were scarcely out
-of my mouth before I saw that I had blundered. Too late! My terms were
-quietly accepted. Let me cast no slightest aspersion upon the methods of
-the syndicate: the bargain was completed before lunch had commenced.
-
-The syndicate disposed of the whole first serial rights of my tale to a
-well-known London weekly. The proprietors of the paper engaged a
-first-class artist to illustrate it, they issued a special circular
-about it, they advertised it every week on 800 railway stations. The
-editor of the paper wrote me an extremely appreciative letter as to the
-effect of the serial from his point of view. The syndicate informed a
-friend of mine that it was the best serial they had ever had. After
-running in London it overran the provincial press like a locust-swarm.
-It was, in a word, a boom. It came out in volume form, and immediately
-went into a second edition; it still sells. It was the first of my books
-that "The Times" ever condescended to review; the "Spectator" took it
-seriously in a column and a quarter; and my friends took it seriously. I
-even received cables from foreign lands with offers to buy translation
-rights. I became known as the author of that serial. And all this, save
-for an insignificant trifle, to the profit of an exceedingly astute
-syndicate!
-
-Subsequently I wrote other serials, but never again with the same verve.
-I found an outlet for my energies more amusing and more remunerative
-than the concoction of serials; and I am a serialist no longer.
-
-
-
-
-XIII
-
-
-While yet an assistant-editor, I became a dramatic critic through the
-unwillingness of my chief to attend a theatrical matinée performance
-given, by some forlorn little society, now defunct, for the rejuvenation
-of the English drama. My notice of the performance amused him, and soon
-afterwards he suggested that I should do our dramatic column in his
-stead. Behold me a "first-nighter"! When, with my best possible air of
-nonchalance and custom, I sauntered into my stall on a Lyceum first
-night, I glanced at the first rows of the pit with cold and aloof
-disdain. "Don't you wish you were me?" I thought behind that
-supercilious mask. "You have stood for hours imprisoned between parallel
-iron railings. Many times I have stood with you. But never again,
-miserable pittites!" Nevertheless I was by no means comfortable in my
-stall. Around me were dozens of famous or notorious faces, the leading
-representatives of all that is glittering and factitious in the city of
-wealth, pleasure, and smartness. And everybody seemed to know everybody
-else. I alone seemed to be left out in the cold. My exasperated
-self-conscious fancy perceived in every haughty stare the enquiry: "Who
-is this whipper-snapper in the dress-suit that obviously cost four
-guineas in Cheapside?" I knew not a soul in that brilliant resort.
-During the intervals I went into the foyer and listened to the phrases
-which the critics tossed to each other over their liqueur-glasses. Never
-was such a genial confusion of "Old Chap," "Old Man," "Old Boy," "Dear
-Old Pal"! "Are they all blood-brothers?" I asked myself. The banality,
-the perfect lack of any sort of aesthetic culture, which characterized
-their remarks on the piece, astounded me. I said arrogantly: "If I don't
-know more about the art of the theatre than the whole crowd of you put
-together, I will go out and hang myself." Yet I was unspeakably proud to
-be among them. In a corner I caught sight of a renowned novelist whose
-work I respected. None noticed him, and he looked rather sorry for
-himself. "You and I . . .!" I thought. I had not attended many first
-nights before I discovered that the handful of theatrical critics whose
-articles it is possible to read without fatigue, made a point of never
-leaving their stalls. They were nobody's old chap, and nobody's old pal.
-I copied their behaviour.
-
-First on my own paper, and subsequently on two others, I practised
-dramatic criticism for five or six years. Although I threw it up in the
-end mainly from sheer lassitude, I enjoyed the work. It means late
-nights, and late nights are perdition; but there is a meretricious
-glamour about it that attracts the foolish moth in me, and this I am
-bound to admit. My trifling influence over the public was decidedly on
-the side of the angels. I gradually found that I possessed a coherent
-theory of the drama, definite critical standards, and all the rest of
-the apparatus; in short, that I had something to say. And my verdicts
-had a satisfactory habit of coinciding with those of the two foremost
-theatrical critics in London--perhaps in Europe (I need not name them).
-It is a somewhat strange fact that I made scarcely any friends in the
-theatre. After all those years of assiduous first-nighting, I was almost
-as solitary in the auditorium on the evening when I bade a _blase_ adieu
-to the critical bench as when I originally entered it. I fancied I had
-wasted my time and impaired my constitution in emulating the
-achievements of Théophile Gautier, Hazlitt, Francisque Sarcey and M.
-Jules Lemaître, to say nothing of Dutton Cook and Mr. Clement Scott. My
-health may have suffered; but, as it happened, I had not quite wasted my
-time.
-
-"Why don't you write a play yourself?"
-
-This blunt question was put to me by a friend, an amateur actor, whom I
-had asked to get up some little piece or other for an entertainment in
-the Theatre Royal back-drawing-room of my house.
-
-"Quite out of my line," I replied, and I was absolutely sincere. I had
-no notion whatever of writing for the stage. I felt sure that I had not
-the aptitude.
-
-"Nonsense!" he Exclaimed. "It's as easy as falling off a log."
-
-We argued, and I was on the point of refusing the suggestion, when the
-spirit of wild adventure overcame me, and I gravely promised my friend
-that I would compose a duologue if he and his wife would promise to
-perform it at my party. The affair was arranged. I went to bed with the
-conviction that in the near future I stood a fair chance of looking an
-ass. However, I met with what I thought to be an amusing idea for a
-curtain-raiser the next morning, and in the afternoon I wrote the piece
-complete. I enjoyed writing it, and as I read it aloud to myself I
-laughed at it. I discovered that I had violated the great canon of
-dramatic art,--Never keep your audience in the dark, and this troubled
-me (Paul Hervieu had not then demonstrated by his "L'Enigme" that
-canon may be broken with impunity); but I could not be at the trouble of
-reconstructing the whole play for the sake of an Aristotelian maxim. I
-at once posted the original draft to my friend with this note: "Dear
-----, Here is the play which last night I undertook to write for you."
-
-The piece was admirably rendered to an audience of some thirty immortal
-souls--of course very sympathetic immortal souls. My feelings, as the
-situation which I had invented gradually developed into something alive
-on that tiny make-shift stage, were peculiar and, in a way, alarming.
-Every one who has driven a motor-car knows the uncanny sensation that
-ensues when for the first time in your life you pull the starting lever,
-and the Thing beneath you begins mysteriously and formidably to move. It
-is at once an astonishment, a terror, and a delight. I felt like that as
-I watched the progress of my first play. It was as though I had
-unwittingly liberated an energy greater than I knew, actually created
-something vital. This illusion of physical vitality is the exclusive
-possession of the dramatist; the novelist, the poet, cannot share it.
-The play was a delicious success. People laughed so much that some of my
-most subtle jocosities were drowned in the appreciative cachinnation.
-The final applause was memorable, at any rate to me. No mere good-nature
-can simulate the unique ring of genuine applause, and this applause was
-genuine. It was a microscopic triumph for me, but it was a triumph.
-Every one said to me: "But you are a dramatist!" "Oh, no!" I replied
-awkwardly; "this trifle is really nothing." But the still small voice of
-my vigorous self-confidence said: "Yes, you are, and you ought to have
-found it out years ago!" Among my audience was a publisher. He invited
-me to write for him a little book of one-act farces for amateurs; his
-terms were agreeable. I wrote three such farces, giving two days to
-each, and the volume was duly published; no book of mine has cost me
-less trouble. The reviews of it were lavish in praise of my "unfailing
-wit"; the circulation was mediocre. I was asked by companies of amateur
-actors up and down the country to assist at rehearsals of these pieces;
-but I could never find the energy to comply, save once. I hankered after
-the professional stage. By this time I could see that I was bound to
-enter seriously into the manufacture of stage-plays. My readers will
-have observed that once again in my history the inducement to embark for
-a fresh port had been quite external and adventitious.
-
-I had a young friend with an extraordinary turn for brilliant epigram
-and an equally extraordinary gift for the devising of massive themes. He
-showed me one day the manuscript of a play. My faith in my instinct for
-form, whether in drama or fiction, was complete, and I saw instantly
-that what this piece lacked was form, which means intelligibility. It
-had everything except intelligibility. "Look here!" I said to him, "we
-will write a play together, you and I. We can do something that will
-knock spots off----" etc., etc. We determined upon a grand drawing-room
-melodrama which should unite style with those qualities that make for
-financial success on the British stage. In a few days my friend produced
-a list of about a dozen "ideas" for the piece. I chose the two largest
-and amalgamated them. In the confection of the plot, and also throughout
-the entire process of manufacture, my experience as a dramatic critic
-proved valuable. I believe my friend had only seen two plays in his
-life. We accomplished our first act in a month or so, and when this was
-done and the scenario of the other three written out, we informed each
-other that the stuff was exceedingly good.
-
-Part of my share in the play was to sell it. I knew but one man of any
-importance in the theatrical world; he gave me an introduction to the
-manager of a West End theatre second to none in prestige and wealth. The
-introduction had weight; the manager intimated by letter that his sole
-object in life was to serve me, and in the meantime he suggested an
-appointment. I called one night with our first act and the scenario, and
-amid the luxuriousness of the managerial room, the aroma of coffee, the
-odour of Turkish cigarettes, I explained to that manager the true
-greatness of our play. I have never been treated with a more distinguished
-politeness; I might have been Victorien Sardou, or Ibsen . . . (no,
-not Ibsen). In quite a few days the manager telephoned to my
-office and asked me to call the same evening. He had read the
-manuscript; he thought very highly of it, very highly. "But----" Woe!
-Desolation! Dissipation of airy castles! It was preposterous on our part
-to expect that our first play should be commissioned by a leading
-theatre. But indeed we had expected this miracle. The fatal "But" arose
-from a difficulty of casting the principal part; so the manager told me.
-He was again remarkably courteous, and he assuaged the rigour of his
-refusal by informing me that he was really in need of a curtain-raiser
-with a part for a certain actress of his company; he fancied that we
-could supply him with the desired _bibelot_; but he wanted it at once,
-within a week. Within a week my partner and I had each written a one-act
-play, and in less than a fortnight I received a third invitation to
-discuss coffee, Turkish cigarettes, and plays. The manager began to talk
-about the play which was under my own signature.
-
-"Now, what is your idea of terms?" he said, walking to and fro.
-
-"Can it be true," I thought, "that I have actually sold a play to this
-famous manager?" In a moment my simple old ambitions burst like a Roman
-candle into innumerable bright stars. I had been content hitherto with
-the prospect of some fame, a thousand a year, and a few modest luxuries.
-But I knew what the earnings of successful dramatists were. My thousand
-increased tenfold; my mind dwelt on all the complex sybaritism of
-European capitals; and I saw how I could make use of the unequalled
-advertisement of theatrical renown to find a ready market for the most
-artistic fiction that I was capable of writing. This new scheme of
-things sprang into my brain instantaneously, full-grown.
-
-I left the theatre an accepted dramatist.
-
-It never rains but it pours. My kind manager mentioned our stylistic
-drawing-room melodrama to another manager with such laudation that the
-second manager was eager to see it. Having seen it, he was eager to buy
-it. He gave us a hundred down to finish it in three months, and when we
-had finished it he sealed a contract for production with another cheque
-for a hundred. At the same period, through the mediation of the friend
-who had first introduced me to this world where hundreds were thrown
-about like fivers, I was commissioned by the most powerful theatrical
-manager on earth to assist in the dramatization of a successful novel;
-and this led to another commission of a similar nature, on more
-remunerative terms. Then a certain management telegraphed for me (in the
-theatre all business is done by telegraph and cable), and offered me a
-commission to compress a five-act Old English comedy into three acts.
-
-"We might have offered this to So-and-So or So-and-So," they said,
-designating persons of importance. "But we preferred to come to you."
-
-"I assume my name is to appear?" I said.
-
-But my name was not to appear, and I begged to be allowed to decline the
-work.
-
-I suddenly found myself on terms of familiarity with some of the great
-ones of the stage. I found myself invited into the Garrick Club, and
-into the more Bohemian atmosphere of the Green Room Club. I became
-accustomed to hearing the phrase: "You are the dramatist of the future."
-One afternoon I was walking down Bedford Street when a hand was placed
-on my shoulder, and a voice noted for its rich and beautiful quality
-exclaimed: "How the d----l are you, my dear chap?" The speaker bears a
-name famous throughout the English-speaking world.
-
-"You are arriving!" I said to myself, naïvely proud of this greeting. I
-had always understood that the theatrical "ring" was impenetrable to an
-outsider; and yet I had stepped into the very middle of it without the
-least trouble.
-
-My collaborator and I then wrote a farce. "We can't expect to sell
-everything," I said to him warningly, but I sold it quite easily. Indeed
-I sold it, repurchased it, and sold it again, within the space of three
-months.
-
-Reasons of discretion prevent me from carrying my theatrical record
-beyond this point.
-
-I have not spoken of the artistic side of this play-concoction, because
-it scarcely has any. My aim in writing plays, whether alone or in
-collaboration, has always been strictly commercial.[3] I wanted money in
-heaps, and I wanted advertisement for my books. Here and there, in the
-comedies and farces in which I have been concerned, a little genuine
-dramatic art has, I fancy, been introduced; but surreptitiously, and
-quite unknown to the managers. I have never boasted of it in managerial
-apartments. That I have amused myself while constructing these
-arabesques of intrigue and epigram is indubitable, whether to my credit
-or discredit as a serious person. I laugh constantly in writing a farce.
-I have found it far easier to compose a commercial play than an artistic
-novel. How our princes of the dramatic kingdom can contrive to spend two
-years over a single piece, as they say they do, I cannot imagine. The
-average play contains from eighteen to twenty thousand words; the
-average novel contains eighty thousand; after all, writing is a question
-of words. At the rate of a thousand words a day, one could write a play
-three times over in a couple of months; prefix a month--thirty solid
-days of old Time!--for the perfecting of the plot, and you will be able
-to calculate the number of plays producible by an expert craftsman in a
-year. And unsuccessful plays are decidedly more remunerative than many
-successful novels. I am quite certain that the vast majority of failures
-produced in the West End mean to their authors a minimum remuneration of
-ten pounds per thousand words. In the fiction-mart ten pounds per
-thousand is gilded opulence. I am neither Sardou, Sudermann, nor George
-R. Sims, but I know what I am talking about, and I say that dramatic
-composition for the market is child's play compared to the writing of
-decent average fiction--provided one has an instinct for stage effect.
-
-
-[Footnote 3: Once more written in 1900.]
-
-
-
-
-XIV
-
-
-It cuts me to the heart to compare English with American publishers to
-the disadvantage, however slight, of the former; but the exigencies of a
-truthful narrative demand from me this sacrifice of personal feeling to
-the god in "the sleeping-car emblematic of British enterprise." The
-representative of a great American firm came over to England on a
-mission to cultivate personal relations with authors of repute and
-profitableness. Among other documents of a similar nature, he had an
-introduction to myself; I was not an author of repute and
-profitableness, but I was decidedly in the movement and a useful sort of
-person to know. We met and became friends, this ambassador and I; he
-liked my work, a sure avenue to my esteem; I liked his genial
-shrewdness. Shortly afterwards, there appeared in a certain paper an
-unsigned article dealing, in a broad survey alleged to be masterly, with
-the evolution of the literary market during the last thirty years. My
-American publisher read the article--he read everything--and,
-immediately deciding in his own mind that I was the author of it, he
-wrote me an enthusiastic letter of appreciation. He had not been
-deceived; I was the author of the article. Within the next few days it
-happened that he encountered an English publisher who complained that he
-could not find a satisfactory "reader." He informed the English
-publisher of my existence, referred eulogistically to my article, and
-gave his opinion that I was precisely the man whom the English publisher
-needed. The English publisher had never heard of me (I do not blame him,
-I merely record), but he was so moved by the American's oration that he
-invited me to lunch at his club. I lunched at his club, in a discreet
-street off Piccadilly (an aged and a sound wine!), and after lunch, my
-host drew me out to talk at large on the subject of authors, publishers,
-and cash, and the interplay of these three. I talked. I talked for a
-very long while, enjoying it. The experience was a new one for me. The
-publisher did not agree with all that I said, but he agreed with a good
-deal of it, and at the close of the somewhat exhausting assize, in which
-between us we had judged the value of nearly every literary reputation
-in England, he offered me the post of principal reader to his firm, and
-I accepted it.
-
-It is, I believe, an historical fact that authors seldom attend the
-funeral of a publisher's reader. They approve the sepulture, but do not,
-save sometimes in a spirit of ferocious humour, lend to the procession
-the dignity of their massive figures. Nevertheless, the publisher's
-reader is the most benevolent person on earth. He is so perforce. He may
-begin his labours in the slaughterous vein of the "Saturday Review"; but
-time and the extraordinary level mediocrity of manuscripts soon cure him
-of any such tendency. He comes to refuse but remains to accept. He must
-accept something--or where is the justification of his existence? Often,
-after a prolonged run of bad manuscripts, I have said to myself: "If I
-don't get a chance to recommend something soon I shall be asked to
-resign." I long to look on a manuscript and say that it is good, or that
-there are golden sovereigns between the lines. Instead of searching for
-faults I search for hidden excellences. No author ever had a more
-lenient audience than I. If the author would only believe it, I want, I
-actually desire, to be favourably impressed by his work. When I open the
-parcel of typescript I beam on it with kindly eyes, and I think:
-"Perhaps there is something really good here"; and in that state of mind
-I commence the perusal. But there never is anything really good there.
-In an experience not vast, but extending over some years, only one book
-with even a touch of genius has passed through my hands; that book was
-so faulty and so wilfully wild, that I could not unreservedly advise its
-publication and my firm declined it; I do not think that the book has
-been issued elsewhere. I have "discovered" only two authors of talent;
-one of these is very slowly achieving a reputation; of the other I have
-heard nothing since his first book, which resulted in a financial loss.
-Time and increasing knowledge of the two facts have dissipated for me
-the melancholy and affecting legend of literary talent going a-begging
-because of the indifference of publishers. O young author of talent,
-would that I could find you and make you understand how the publisher
-yearns for you as the lover for his love! _Qua_ publisher's reader, I am
-a sad man, a man confirmed in disappointment, a man in whom the
-phenomenon of continued hope is almost irrational. When I look back
-along the frightful vista of dull manuscripts that I have refused or
-accepted, I tremble for the future of English literature (or should
-tremble, did I not infallibly know that the future of English literature
-is perfectly safe after all)! And yet I have by no means drunk the worst
-of the cup of mediocrity. The watery milk of the manuscripts sent to my
-employer has always been skimmed for me by others; I have had only the
-cream to savour. I am asked sometimes why publishers publish so many bad
-books; and my reply is: "Because they can't get better." And this is a
-profound truth solemnly enunciated.
-
-People have said to me: "_But you are so critical; you condemn
-everything_." Such is the complaint of the laity against the initiate,
-against the person who has diligently practised the cultivation of his
-taste. And, roughly speaking, it is a well-founded and excusable
-complaint. The person of fine taste does condemn nearly everything. He
-takes his pleasure in a number of books so limited as to be almost
-nothing in comparison with the total mass of production. Out of two
-thousand novels issued in a year, he may really enjoy half-a-dozen at
-the outside. And the one thousand nine hundred and ninety-four he lumps
-together in a wholesale contempt which draws no distinctions. This is
-right. This contributes to the preservation of a high standard. But the
-laity will never be persuaded that it is just. The point I wish to make,
-however, is that when I sit down to read for my publisher I first of all
-forget my literary exclusiveness. I sink the aesthetic aristocrat and
-become a plain man. By a deliberate act of imagination, I put myself in
-the place, not of the typical average reader--for there is no such
-person--but of a composite of the various _genera_ of average reader
-known to publishing science. I _am_ that composite for the time; and,
-being so, I remain quiescent and allow f the book to produce its own
-effect on me. I employ no canons, rules, measures. Does the book bore
-me--that condemns it. Does it interest me, ever so slightly--that is
-enough to entitle it to further consideration. When I have decided that
-it interests the imaginary composite whom I represent, then I become
-myself again, and proceed scientifically to enquire why it has
-interested, and why it has not interested more intensely; I proceed to
-catalogue its good and bad qualities, to calculate its chances, to assay
-its monetary worth.
-
-The first gift of a publisher's reader should be imagination; without
-imagination, the power to put himself in a position in which actually he
-is not, fine taste is useless--indeed, it is worse than useless. The
-ideal publisher's reader should have two perfections--perfect taste and
-perfect knowledge of what the various kinds of other people deem to be
-taste. Such qualifications, even in a form far from perfect, are rare. A
-man is born with them; though they may be cultivated, they cannot either
-of them be acquired. The remuneration of the publisher's reader ought,
-therefore, to be high, lavish, princely. It it not. It has nothing
-approaching these characteristics. Instead of being regarded as the
-ultimate seat of directing energy, the brain within the publisher's
-brain, the reader often exists as a sort of offshoot, an accident, an
-external mechanism which must be employed because it is the custom to
-employ it. As one reflects upon the experience and judgment which
-readers must possess, the responsibility which weighs on them, and the
-brooding hypochondriasis engendered by their mysterious calling, one
-wonders that their salaries do not enable them to reside in Park Lane or
-Carlton House Terrace. The truth is, that they exist precariously in
-Walham Green, Camberwell, or out in the country where rents are low.
-
-I have had no piquant adventures as a publisher's reader. The vocation
-fails in piquancy: that is precisely where it does fail. Occasionally
-when a manuscript comes from some established author who has been deemed
-the private property of another house, there is the excitement of
-discovering from the internal evidence of the manuscript, or from the
-circumstantial evidence of public facts carefully collated, just why
-that manuscript has been offered to my employer; and the discovered
-reason is always either amusing or shameful. But such excitements are
-rare, and not very thrilling after all. No! Reading for a publisher does
-not foster the joy of life. I have never done it with enthusiasm; and,
-frankly, I continue to do it more from habit than from inclination. One
-learns too much in the rôle. The gilt is off the gingerbread, and the
-bloom is off the rye, for a publisher's reader. The statistics of
-circulations are before him; and no one who is aware of the actual
-figures which literary advertisements are notoriously designed to
-conceal can be called happy until he is dead.
-
-
-
-
-XV
-
-
-When I had been in London a decade, I stood aside from myself and
-reviewed my situation with the god-like and detached impartiality of a
-trained artistic observer. And what I saw was a young man who
-pre-eminently knew his way about, and who was apt to be rather too
-complacent over this fact; a young man with some brilliance but far more
-shrewdness; a young man with a highly developed faculty for making a
-little go a long way; a young man who was accustomed to be listened to
-when he thought fit to speak, and who was decidedly more inclined to
-settle questions than to raise them.
-
-This young man had invaded the town as a clerk at twenty-five shillings
-a week, paying six shillings a week for a bed-sitting room, threepence
-for his breakfast, and sixpence for his vegetarian dinner. The curtain
-falls on the prologue. Ten years elapse. The curtain rises on the figure
-of an editor, novelist, dramatist, critic, connoisseur of all arts. See
-him in his suburban residence, with its poplar-shaded garden, its
-bicycle-house at the extremity thereof, and its horizon composed of the
-District Railway Line. See the study, lined with two thousand books,
-garnished with photogravures, and furnished with a writing-bureau and a
-chair and nothing else. See the drawing-room with its artistic
-wall-paper, its Kelmscotts, its water-colours of a pallid but
-indubitable distinction, its grand piano on which are a Wagnerian score
-and Bach's Two-part Inventions. See the bachelor's bedroom, so austere
-and precise, wherein Boswell's "Johnson" and Baudelaire's "Fleurs du
-Mal" exist peaceably together on the night-table. The entire machine
-speaks with one voice, and it tells you that there are no flies on that
-young man, that young man never gives the wrong change. He is in
-the movement, he is correct; but at the same time he is not so simple as
-not to smile with contemptuous toleration at all movements and all
-correctness. He knows. He is a complete guide to art and life. His
-innocent foible is never to be at a loss, and never to be carried
-away--save now and then, because an occasional ecstasy is good for the
-soul. His knowledge of the _coulisses_ of the various arts is wonderful.
-He numbers painters, sculptors, musicians, architects, among his
-intimate friends; and no artistic manifestation can possibly occur that
-he is unable within twenty-four hours to assess at its true value. He is
-terrible against _cabotins_, no matter where he finds them, and this
-seems to be his hobby: to expose _cabotins_.
-
-He is a young man of method; young men do not arrive without method at
-the condition of being encyclopædias; his watch is as correct as his
-judgments. He breakfasts at eight sharp, and his housekeeper sets the
-kitchen clock five minutes fast, for he is a terrible Ivan at breakfast.
-He glances at a couple of newspapers, first at the list of "publications
-received," and then at the news. Of course he is not hoodwinked by
-newspapers. He will meet the foreign editor of the "Daily ----" at lunch
-and will learn the true inwardness of that exploded canard from Berlin.
-Having assessed the newspapers, he may interpret to his own satisfaction
-a movement from a Mozart piano sonata, and then he will brush his hat,
-pick up sundry books, and pass sedately to the station. The
-station-master is respectfully cordial, and quite ready to explain to
-him the secret causation of delays, for his season-ticket is a white
-one. He gets into a compartment with a stockbroker, a lawyer, or a
-tea-merchant, and immediately falls to work; he does his minor reviewing
-in the train, fostering or annihilating reputations while the antique
-engine burrows beneath the squares of the West End; but his brain is not
-so fully occupied that he cannot spare a corner of it to meditate upon
-the extraordinary ignorance and simplicity of stockbrokers, lawyers, and
-tea-merchants. He reaches his office, and for two or three hours
-practises that occupation of watching other people work which is called
-editing: a process always of ordering, of rectifying, of laying down the
-law, of being looked up to, of showing how a thing ought to be done and
-can be done, of being flattered and cajoled, of dispensing joy or
-gloom--in short, the Jupiter and Shah of Persia business. He then
-departs, as to church, to his grill-room, where for a few moments
-himself and the cook hold an anxious consultation to decide which
-particular chop or which particular steak out of a mass of chops and
-steaks shall have the honour of sustaining him till tea-time. The place
-is full of literary shahs and those about to be shahs. They are all in
-the movement; they constitute the movement. They ride the comic-opera
-whirlwinds of public opinion and direct the tea-cup storms of
-popularity. The young man classes most of them with the stockbroker, the
-lawyer, and the tea-merchant. With a few he fraternises, and these few
-save their faces by appreciating the humour of the thing. Soon
-afterwards he goes home, digging _en route_ the graves of more
-reputations, and, surrounded by the two thousand volumes, he works in
-seclusion at his various activities that he may triumph openly. He
-descends to dinner stating that he has written so many thousand words,
-and excellent words too--stylistic, dramatic, tender, witty. There may
-be a theatrical first-night toward, in which case he returns to town and
-sits in the seat of the languid for a space. Or he stays within doors
-and discusses with excessively sophisticated friends the longevity of
-illusions in ordinary people. At length he retires and reads himself to
-sleep. His last thoughts are the long, long thoughts of his perfect
-taste and tireless industry, and of the aesthetic darkness which covers
-the earth. . . .
-
-Such was the young man I inimically beheld. And I was not satisfied with
-him. He was gorgeous, but not sufficiently gorgeous. He had done much in
-ten years, and I excused his facile pride, but he had not done enough.
-The curtain had risen on the first act of the drama of life, but the
-action, the intrigue, the passion seemed to hesitate and halt. Was this
-the artistic and creative life, this daily round? Was this the reality
-of that which I had dreamed? Where was the sense of romance, the
-consciousness of felicity? I felt that I had slipped into a groove which
-wore deeper every day. It seemed to me that I was fettered and tied
-down. I had grown weary of journalism. The necessity of being at a
-certain place at a certain hour on so many days of the week grew irksome
-to me; I regarded it as invasive of my rights as a freeborn Englishman,
-as shameful and scarcely tolerable. Was I a horse that I should be
-ridden on the curb by a Board of Directors? I objected to the theory of
-proprietors. The occasional conferences with the Board, though conducted
-with all the ritual of an extreme punctilio, were an indignity. The
-suave requests of the chairman: "Will you kindly tell us----?" And my
-defensive replies, and then the dismissal: "Thank you, Mr.----, I think
-we need trouble you no further this morning." And my exit, irritated by
-the thought that I was about to be discussed with the freedom that
-Boards in conclave permit themselves. It was as bad as being bullied by
-London University at an examination. I longed to tell this Board, with
-whom I was so amicable on unofficial occasions, that they were using a
-razor to cut firewood. I longed to tell them that the nursing of their
-excellent and precious organ was seriously interfering with the
-composition of great works and the manufacture of a dazzling reputation.
-I longed to point out to them that the time would come when they would
-mention to their friends with elaborate casualness and covert pride that
-they had once employed me, the unique me, at a salary measurable in
-hundreds.
-
-Further, I was ill-pleased with literary London. "You have a literary
-life here," an American editor once said to me. "There is a literary
-circle, an atmosphere. . . . We have no such thing in New York." I
-answered that no doubt we had; but I spoke without enthusiasm. I suppose
-that if any one "moved in literary circles," I did, then. Yet I derived
-small satisfaction from my inclusion within those circumferences. To me
-there was a lack of ozone in the atmosphere which the American editor
-found so invigorating. Be it understood that when I say "literary
-circles," I do not in the least mean genteel Bohemia, the world of
-informal At-Homes that are all formality, where the little lions growl
-on their chains in a row against a drawing-room wall, and the hostess
-congratulates herself that every single captive in the salon has "done
-something." Such polite racketting, such discreet orgies of the higher
-intellectuality, may suit the elegant triflers, the authors of
-monographs on Velasquez, golf, Dante, asparagus, royalties, ping-pong,
-and Empire; but the business men who write from ten to fifty thousands
-words a week without chattering about it, have no use for the literary
-menagerie. I lived among the real business men--and even so I was
-dissatisfied. I believe too that they were dissatisfied, most of them.
-There is an infection in the air of London, a zymotic influence which is
-the mysterious cause of unnaturalness, pose, affectation, artificiality,
-moral neuritis, and satiety. One loses grasp of the essentials in an
-undue preoccupation with the vacuities which society has invented. The
-distractions are too multiform. One never gets a chance to talk
-common-sense with one's soul.
-
-Thirdly, the rate at which I was making headway did not please me. My
-reputation was growing, but only like a coral-reef. Many people had an
-eye on me, as on one for whom the future held big things. Many people
-took care to read almost all that I wrote. But my name had no
-significance for the general public. The mention of my name would have
-brought no recognizing smile to the average person who is "fond of
-reading." I wanted to do something large, arresting, and decisive. And I
-saw no chance of doing this. I had too many irons in the fire. I was
-frittering myself away in a multitude of diverse activities of the pen.
-
-I pondered upon these considerations for a long while. I saw only one
-way out, and, at last, circumstances appearing to conspire to lead me
-into that way, I wrote a letter to my Board of Directors and resigned my
-editorial post. I had decided to abandon London, that delectable
-paradise of my youthful desires. A To-let notice flourished suddenly in
-my front-garden, and my world became aware that I was going to desert
-it. The majority thought me rash and unwise, and predicted an
-ignominious return to Fleet Street. But the minority upheld my
-resolution. I reached down a map of England, and said that I must live
-on a certain main-line at a certain minimum distance from London. This
-fixed the neighbourhood of my future home. The next thing was to find
-that home, and with the aid of friends and a bicycle I soon found it.
-One fine wet day I stole out of London in a new quest of romance. No one
-seemed to be fundamentally disturbed over my exodus. I remarked to
-myself: "Either you are a far-seeing and bold fellow, or you are a fool.
-Time will show which." And that night I slept, or failed to sleep, in a
-house that was half a mile from the next house, three miles from a
-station, and three miles from a town. I had left the haunts of men with
-a vengeance, and incidentally I had left a regular income.
-
-I ran over the list of our foremost writers: they nearly all lived in
-the country.
-
-
-
-
-XVI
-
-
-When I had settled down into the landscape, bought my live-stock,
-studied manuals on horses, riding, driving, hunting, dogs, poultry, and
-wildflowers, learned to distinguish between wheat and barley and between
-a six-year-old and an aged screw, shot a sparrow on the fence only to
-find it was a redbreast, drunk the cherry-brandy of the Elizabethan inn,
-played in the village cricket team, and ceased to feel self-conscious in
-riding-breeches, I perceived with absolute certainty that I had made no
-error; I knew that, come poverty or the riches of Indian short stories,
-I should never again live permanently in London. I expanded, and in my
-expansion I felt rather sorry for Londoners. I perceived, too, that the
-country possessed commercial advantages which I had failed to appreciate
-before. When you live two and a half miles from a railway you can cut a
-dash on an income which in London spells omnibus instead of cab. For
-myself I have a profound belief in the efficacy of cutting a dash. You
-invite an influential friend down for the week-end. You meet him at the
-station with a nice little grey mare in a phaeton, and an unimpeachable
-Dalmatian running behind. The turn-out is nothing alone, but the
-pedigree printed in the pinkiness of that dog's chaps and in the
-exiguity of his tail, spotted to the last inch, would give tone to a
-coster's cart. You see that your influential friend wishes to comment,
-but as you gather up the reins you carefully begin to talk about the
-weather and prices per thousand. You rush him home in twelve minutes,
-skimming gate posts. On Monday morning, purposely running it fine, you
-hurry him into a dog-cart behind a brown cob fresh from a pottle of
-beans, and you whirl him back to the station in ten minutes, up-hill
-half the way. You fling him into the train, with ten seconds to spare.
-"This is how we do it in these parts," your studiously nonchalant face
-says to him. He thinks. In a few hours Fleet Street becomes aware that
-young So-and-so, who lately buried himself in the country, is alive and
-lusty. Your stock rises. You go up one. You extort respect. You are
-ticketed in the retentive brains of literary shahs as a success. And you
-still have the dog left for another day.
-
-In the country there is plenty of space and plenty of time, and no
-damnable fixed relation between these two; in other words, a particular
-hour does not imply a particular spot for you, and this is something to
-an author. I found my days succeeding each other with a leisurely and
-adorable monotony. I lingered over breakfast like a lord, perusing the
-previous evening's papers with as much gusto as though they were hot
-from the press. I looked sideways at my work, with a non-committal air,
-as if saying; "I may do you or I may not. I shall see how I feel." I
-went out for a walk, followed by dogs less spectacular than the
-Dalmatian, to collect ideas. I had nothing to think about but my own
-direct productiveness. I stopped to examine the progress of trees, to
-discuss meteorology with roadmenders, to wonder why lambs always waggled
-their tails during the act of taking sustenance. All was calmness,
-serenity. The embryo of the article or the chapter faintly adumbrated
-itself in my mind, assumed a form. One idea, then another; then an
-altercation with the dogs, ending in castigation, disillusion, and
-pessimism for them. Suddenly I exclaimed: "I think I've got enough to go
-on with!" And I turned back homewards. I reached my study and sat down.
-From my windows I beheld a magnificent panorama of hills. Now the
-contemplation of hills is uplifting to the soul; it leads to inspiration
-and induces nobility of character, but it has a tendency to interfere
-with actual composition. I stared long at those hills. Should I work,
-should I not work? A brief period always ensued when the odds were
-tremendous against any work being done that day. Then I seized the pen
-and wrote the title. Then another dreadful and disconcerting pause, all
-ideas having scuttled away like mice to their holes. Well, I must put
-something down, however ridiculous. I wrote a sentence, feeling first
-that it would not serve and then that it would have to serve, anyway. I
-glanced at the clock. Ten twenty-five! I watched the clock in a sort of
-hypnotism that authors know of, till it showed ten-thirty. Then with a
-horrible wrench I put the pen in the ink again . . . . Jove! Eleven
-forty-five, and I had written seven hundred words. Not bad stuff that!
-Indeed, very good! Time for a cigarette and a stroll round to hear
-wisdom from the gardener. I resumed at twelve, and then in about two
-minutes it was one o'clock and lunch time. After lunch, rest for the
-weary and the digesting; slumber; another stroll. Arrival of the second
-post on a Russian pony that cost fifty shillings. Tea, and perusal of
-the morning paper. Then another spell of work, and the day was gone,
-vanished, distilled away. And about five days made a week, and
-forty-eight weeks a year.
-
-No newspaper-proprietors, contributors, circulations, placards,
-tape-machines, theatres, operas, concerts, picture-galleries, clubs,
-restaurants, parties, Undergrounds! Nothing artificial, except myself
-and my work! And nothing, save the fear of rent-day, to come between
-myself and my work!
-
-It was dull, you will tell me. But I tell you it was magnificent.
-Monotony, solitude, are essential to the full activity of the artist.
-Just as a horse is seen best when coursing alone over a great plain, so
-the fierce and callous egotism of the artist comes to its perfection in
-a vast expanse of custom, leisure, and apparently vacuous reverie. To
-insist on forgetting his work, to keep his mind a blank until the work,
-no longer to be held in check, rushes into that emptiness and fills it
-up--that is one of the secrets of imaginative creation. Of course it is
-not a recipe for every artist. I have known artists, and genuine ones,
-who could keep their minds empty and suck in the beauty of the world for
-evermore without the slightest difficulty; who only wrote, as the early
-Britons hunted, when they were hungry and there was nothing in the pot.
-But I was not of that species. On the contrary, the incurable habit of
-industry, the itch for the pen, was my chiefest curse. To be
-unproductive for more than a couple of days or so was to be miserable.
-Like most writers I was frequently the victim of an illogical,
-indefensible and causeless melancholy; but one kind of melancholy could
-always be explained, and that was the melancholy of idleness. I could
-never divert myself with hobbies. I did not read much, except in the way
-of business. Two hours reading, even of Turgenev or Balzac or Montaigne,
-wearied me out. An author once remarked to me; "_I know enough. I don't
-read books, I write 'em_." It was a haughty and arrogant saying, but
-there is a sense in which it was true. Often I have felt like that: "I
-know enough, I feel enough. If my future is as long as my past, I shall
-still not be able to put down the tenth part of what I have already
-acquired." The consciousness of this, of what an extraordinary and
-wonderful museum of perceptions and emotions my brain was, sustained me
-many a time against the chagrins, the delays, and the defeats of the
-artistic career. Often have I said inwardly: "World, when I talk with
-you, dine with you, wrangle with you, love you, and hate you, I
-condescend!" Every artist has said that. People call it conceit; people
-may call it what they please. One of the greatest things a great man
-said, is:--
-
-
- I know I am august
- I do not trouble my spirit to indicate itself or to be
- understood . . .
- I exist as I am, that is enough.
- If no other in the world be aware I sit content.
- And if each and all be aware I sit content.
-
-
-Nevertheless, for me, the contentment of the ultimate line surpassed the
-contentment of the penultimate. And therefore it was, perhaps, that I
-descended on London from time to time like a wolf on the fold, and made
-the world aware, and snatched its feverish joys for a space, and then,
-surfeited and advertised, went back and relapsed into my long monotony.
-And sometimes I would suddenly halt and address myself:
-
-"You may be richer or you may be poorer; you may live in greater pomp
-and luxury, or in less. The point is that you will always be,
-essentially, what you are now. You have no real satisfaction to look
-forward to except the satisfaction of continually inventing, fancying,
-imagining, scribbling. Say another thirty years of these emotional
-ingenuities, these interminable variations on the theme of beauty. Is it
-good enough?"
-
-And I answered: Yes.
-
-But who knows? Who can preclude the regrets of the dying couch?
-
-
-
-
-THE END
-
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-<div style='text-align:center; font-size:1.2em; font-weight:bold'>The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Truth about an Author, by Arnold Bennett</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online
-at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you
-are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the
-country where you are located before using this eBook.
-</div>
-
-<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: The Truth about an Author</p>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: Arnold Bennett</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: November 4, 2021 [eBook #66661]</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Character set encoding: UTF-8</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Produced by: Laura Natal Rodrigues</div>
-
-<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE TRUTH ABOUT AN AUTHOR ***</div>
-
-<div class="figcenter" style="width: 500px;">
-<img src="images/author_cover.jpg" width="500" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-
-<h1>THE TRUTH ABOUT
-<br />
-AN AUTHOR</h1>
-
-
-
-
-
-<h4>NEW EDITION WITH PREFACE</h4>
-
-
-
-
-<h4>BY </h4>
-
-<h2>ARNOLD BENNETT</h2>
-
-<h4>Author of "How to Live on 24 Hours a Day,"<br />
-"The Old Wives' Tale," etc.</h4>
-
-
-
-
-<h4>GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY</h4>
-
-<h4>PUBLISHERS</h4>
-
-<h4>NEW YORK</h4>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h5><i>Copyright, 1911</i><br />
-By George H. Doran Company</h5>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4>CONTENTS</h4>
-<p class="nind"><a href="#PREFACE">PREFACE TO THE NEW EDITION</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#I">I</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#II">II</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#III">III</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#IV">IV</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#V">V</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#VI">VI</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#VII">VII</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#VIII">VIII</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#IX">IX</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#X">X</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#XI">XI</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#XII">XII</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#XIII">XIII</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#XIV">XIV</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#XV">XV</a><br />
-CHAPTER <a href="#XVI">XVI</a></p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-
-<h4><a id="PREFACE">PREFACE TO THE NEW EDITION</a></h4>
-
-<p>
-Sometime in the last century I was for several years one of the most
-regular contributors to "The Academy," under the editorship of Mr. Lewis
-Hind and the ownership of Mr. Morgan Richards. The work was constant;
-but the pay was bad, as it too often is where a paper has ideals. I well
-remember the day when, by dint of amicable menaces, I got the rate
-raised in my favor from ten to fifteen shillings a column, with a
-minimum of two guineas an article for exposing the fatuity of popular
-idols. One evening I met Mr. Lewis Hind at the first performance of some
-very important play, whose name I forget, in the stalls of some theatre
-whose name I forget. (However, the theatre has since been demolished.)
-We began to talk about the "Academy", and as I was an editor myself, I
-felt justified in offering a little advice to a fellow-creature. "What
-you want in the 'Academy,'" I said, "is a sensational serial." "Yes, I
-know," he replied, with that careful laziness of tone which used to mark
-his more profound utterances, "and I should like you to write your
-literary autobiography for us!" In this singular manner was the notion
-of the following book first presented to me. It was not in the least my
-own notion.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I began to write the opening chapters immediately, for I was fascinated
-by this opportunity to tell the truth about the literary life, and my
-impatience would not wait. I had been earning a living by my pen for a
-number of years, and my experience of the business did not at all
-correspond with anything that I had ever read in print about the
-literary life, whether optimistic or pessimistic. I took a malicious and
-frigid pleasure, as I always do, in setting down facts which are opposed
-to accepted sentimental falsities; and certainly I did not spare myself.
-It did not occur to me, even in the midst of my immense conceit, to
-spare myself. But even had I been tempted to spare myself I should not
-have done so, because there is no surer way of damping the reader's
-interest than to spare oneself in a recital which concerns oneself.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The sensational serial ran in "The Academy" for about three months, but
-I had written it all in the spare hours of a very much shorter period
-than that. It was issued anonymously, partly from discretion, and partly
-in the hope that the London world of letters would indulge in conjecture
-as to its authorship, which in theory was to be kept a dark secret. The
-London world of letters, however, did nothing of the kind. Everybody who
-had any interest in such a matter seemed to know at once the name of the
-author. Mr. Andrew Chatto, whose acquaintance I made just then, assured
-me that he was certain of the authorship of the first article, on
-stylistic evidence; and I found him tearing out the pages of the
-"Academy" and keeping them. I found also a number of other people doing
-the same. In fact I do not exaggerate in saying that the success of the
-serial was terrific&mdash;among about a hundred people. It happened to me
-to see quite sane and sober writing persons gurgle with joy over the mere
-recollection of sundry scenes in my autobiography. But Mr. Andrew
-Chatto, an expert of immense experience, gave me his opinion, with
-perhaps even more than his customary blandness, that the public would
-have no use for my autobiography. I could scarcely adopt his view. It
-seemed to me impossible that so honest a disclosure, which had caused
-such unholy joy in some of the most weary hearts that London contains,
-should pass unheeded by a more general public.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Mr. Andrew Chatto did not publish this particular book of mine. I cannot
-remember if it was offered to him. But I know that it was offered to
-sundry other publishers before at last it found a sponsor. There was no
-wild competition for it, and there was no excitement in the press when
-it appeared. On the other hand, there was a great deal of excitement
-among my friends. The book divided my friends into two camps. A few were
-extraordinarily enthusiastic and delighted. But the majority were
-shocked. Some&mdash;and among these the most intimate and
-beloved&mdash;were so shocked that they could not bear to speak to me
-about the book, and to this day have never mentioned it to me. Frankly,
-I was startled. I suppose the book was too true. Many fine souls can
-only take the truth in very small doses, when it is the truth about some
-one or something they love. One of my friends&mdash;nevertheless a
-realistic novelist of high rank&mdash;declined to credit that I had been
-painting myself; he insisted on treating the central character as
-fictional, while admitting the events described were factual.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The reviews varied from the flaccid indifferent to the ferocious. No
-other book of mine ever had such a bad press, or anything like such a
-bad press. Why respectable and dignified organs should have been moved
-to fury by the publication of a work whose veracity cannot be impugned,
-I have never been quite able to understand; for I attacked no financial
-interests; I did not attack any interest; I merely destroyed a few
-illusions and make-believes. Yet such organs as "The Athenaeum" and
-"Blackwood's" dragged forward their heaviest artillery against the
-anonymous author. In its most virulent days "Blackwood's" could scarcely
-have been more murderous. Its remarks upon me will bear comparison even
-with its notorious attack, by the same well-known hand, on Mr. Bernard
-Shaw. I had, of course, ample opportunities for adjusting the balance
-between myself and the well-known hand, which opportunities I did not
-entirely neglect. Also I was convinced that the time had arrived for
-avowing the authorship, and I immediately included the book in the
-official list of my publications. Till then the dark secret had only
-once been divulged in the press&mdash;by Sir W. Robertson Nicoll. But this
-journalist, whose interest in the literary life is probably unsurpassed,
-refrained from any criticism.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I have purposely forgotten the number of copies sold. It was the
-smallest in my experience of infinitesimal numbers. In due season the
-publishers&mdash;to my regret, and conceivably now to
-theirs&mdash;'remaindered' the poor red-and-green volume. And The Times
-Book Club, having apparently become possessed of a large stock of the
-work, offered it, with my name but without my authority, at a really low
-price. I think the first bargain was fivepence, but later sixpence was
-demanded. As The Times Book Club steadily continued to advertise the
-book, I suppose that at sixpence it must have had quite a vogue. At any
-rate it has been quoted from with more freedom than any other book of
-mine, and has indeed obviously formed the basis of dozens of
-articles&mdash;especially in the United States&mdash;of which the
-writers have omitted to offer me any share in their remuneration. I have
-myself bought copies of it at as high as a shilling a piece, as a
-speculation. And now here, after about a dozen years, is a new edition,
-reproducing word for word the original text in all its ingenuous
-self-complacency.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="I">I</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-I who now reside permanently on that curious fourth-dimensional planet
-which we call the literary world; I, who follow the incredible parasitic
-trade of talking about what people have done, who am a sort of public
-weighing-machine upon which bookish wares must halt before passing from
-the factory to the consumer; I, who habitually think in articles, who
-exist by phrases; I, who seize life at the pen's point and callously
-wrest from it the material which I torture into confections styled
-essays, short stories, novels, and plays; who perceive in passion
-chiefly a theme, and in tragedy chiefly a "situation"; who am so
-morbidly avaricious of beauty that I insist on finding it where even it
-is not; I, in short, who have been victimized to the last degree by a
-literary temperament, and glory in my victimhood, am going to trace as
-well as I can the phenomena of the development of that idiosyncrasy from
-its inception to such maturity as it has attained. To explain it, to
-explain it away, I shall make no attempt; I know that I cannot. I lived
-for a quarter of a century without guessing that I came under the
-category of Max Nordau's polysyllabic accusations; the trifling foolish
-mental discipline which stands to my credit was obtained in science
-schools, examination rooms, and law offices. I grew into a good man of
-business; and my knowledge of affairs, my faculty for the nice conduct
-of negotiations, my skill in suggesting an escape from a dilemma, were
-often employed to serve the many artists among whom, by a sheer and
-highly improbable accident, I was thrown. While sincerely admiring and
-appreciating these people, in another way I condescended to them as
-beings apart and peculiar, and unable to take care of themselves on the
-asphalt of cities; I felt towards them as a policeman at a crossing
-feels towards pedestrians. Proud of my hard, cool head, I used to twit
-them upon the disadvantages of possessing an artistic temperament. Then,
-one day, one of them retorted: "You've got it as badly as any of us, if
-you only knew it." I laughed tolerantly at the remark, but it was like a
-thunderclap in my ears, a sudden and disconcerting revelation. Was I,
-too, an artist? I lay awake at night asking myself this question.
-Something hitherto dormant stirred mysteriously in me; something
-apparently foreign awoke in my hard, cool head, and a duality henceforth
-existed there. On a certain memorable day I saw tears in the eyes of a
-woman as she read some verses which, with journalistic versatility, I
-had written to the order of a musical composer. I walked straight out
-into the street, my heart beating like a horrid metronome. Am I an
-artist? I demanded; and the egotist replied: Can you doubt it?
-</p>
-
-<p>
-From that moment I tacitly assumed a quite new set of possibilities, and
-deliberately ordered the old ruse self to exploit the self just born.
-And so, by encouragement and fostering, by intuition and imitation, and
-perhaps affectation, I gradually became the thing I am, the <i>djinn</i>
-that performs tricks with, some emotions, a pen, and paper. And now,
-having shadowed forth the tale, as Browning did in the prologue to <i>The
-Ring and the Book</i>, I will proceed to amplify it.
-</p>
-
-<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
-<span class="i2">Let this old woe step on the stage again!</span><br />
-<span class="i2">Act itself o'er anew for men to judge.</span>
-</div></div>
-
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="II">II</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-My dealings with literature go back, I suppose, some thirty and three
-years. We came together thus, literature and I. It was in a kitchen at
-midday, and I was waiting for my dinner, hungry and clean, in a tartan
-frock with a pinafore over it. I had washed my own face, and dried it,
-and I remember that my eyes smarted with lingering soap, and my skin was
-drawn by the evaporation of moisture on a cold day. I held in my hand a
-single leaf which had escaped from a printed book. How it came into that
-chubby fist I cannot recall. The reminiscence begins with it already
-there. I gazed hard at the paper, and pretended with all my powers to be
-completely absorbed in its contents; I pretended to ignore some one who
-was rattling saucepans at the kitchen range. On my left a very long and
-mysterious passage led to a pawnshop all full of black bundles. I heard
-my brother crying at the other end of the passage, and his noisy
-naughtiness offended me. For myself, I felt excessively "good" with my
-paper; never since have I been so filled with the sense of perfect
-righteousness. Here was I, clean, quiet, sedate, studious; and there was
-my brother, the illiterate young Hooligan, disturbing the sacrosanct shop,
-and&mdash;what was worse&mdash;ignorant of his inferiority to me. Disgusted
-with him, I passed through the kitchen into another shop on the right,
-still conning the page with soapy, smarting eyes. At this point the
-light of memory is switched off. The printed matter, which sprang out of
-nothingness, vanishes back into the same.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I could not read, I could not distinguish one letter from another. I
-only knew that the signs and wonders constituted print, and I played at
-reading with intense earnestness. I actually felt learned, serious,
-wise, and competently superior, something like George Meredith's "Dr.
-Middleton." Would that I could identify this my very first literature! I
-review three or four hundred books annually now;<a name="FNanchor_1_1" id="FNanchor_1_1"></a><a href="#Footnote_1_1" class="fnanchor">[1]</a> out of crass,
-saccharine, sentimentality, I would give a year's harvest for the volume
-from which that leaf was torn, nay, for the leaf alone, as though it
-might be a Caxton. I remember that the paper was faintly bluish in tint,
-veined, and rather brittle. The book was probably printed in the
-eighteenth century. Perhaps it was Lavater's Physiognomy or Blair's
-Sermons, or Burnet's Own Time. One of these three, I fancy, it must
-surely have been.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-After the miraculous appearance and disappearance of that torn leaf, I
-remember almost nothing of literature for several years. I was six or so
-when The Ugly Duckling aroused in me the melancholy of life, gave me to
-see the deep sadness which pervades all romance, beauty, and adventure.
-I laughed heartily at the old henbird's wise remark that the world
-extended past the next field and much further; I could perceive the
-humour of that. But when the ugly duckling at last flew away on his
-strong pinions, and when he met the swans and was accepted as an equal,
-then I felt sorrowful, agreeably sorrowful. It seemed to me that nothing
-could undo, atone for, the grief and humiliations of the false
-duckling's early youth. I brooded over the injustice of his misfortunes
-for days, and the swans who welcomed him struck me as proud, cold, and
-supercilious in their politeness. I have never read The Ugly Duckling
-since those days. It survives in my memory as a long and complex
-narrative, crowded with vague and mysterious allusions, and wet with the
-tears of things. No novel&mdash;it was a prodigious novel for
-me&mdash;has more deliciously disturbed me, not even "On the Eve" or
-"Lost Illusions." Two years later I read "Hiawatha." The picture which I
-formed of Minnehaha remains vividly and crudely with me; it resembles a
-simpering waxen doll of austere habit. Nothing else can I recall of
-"Hiawatha," save odd lines, and a few names such as Gitchee-Gumee. I did
-not much care for the tale. Soon after I read it, I see a vision of a
-jolly-faced house-painter graining a door. "What do you call that?" I
-asked him, pointing to some very peculiar piece of graining, and he
-replied, gravely: "That, young sir, is a wigwam to wind the moon up
-with." I privately decided that he must have read, not "Hiawatha," but
-something similar and stranger, something even more wig-wammy. I dared
-not question him further, because he was so witty.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I remember no other literature for years. But at the age of eleven I
-became an author. I was at school under a master who was entirely at the
-mercy of the new notions that daily occurred to him. He introduced games
-quite fresh to us, he taught us to fence and to do the lesser circle on
-the horizontal bar; he sailed model yachts for us on the foulest canal
-in Europe; he played us into school to a march of his own composing
-performed on a harmonium by himself; he started a debating society and
-an amateur dramatic club. He even talked about our honour, and, having
-mentioned it, audaciously left many important things to its care&mdash;with
-what frightful results I forget. Once he suffered the spell of
-literature, read us a poem of his own, and told us that any one who
-tried could write poetry. As it were to prove his statement, he ordered
-us all to write a poem on the subject of Courage within a week, and
-promised to crown the best poet with a rich gift. Having been commanded
-to produce a poem on the subject of Courage, I produced a poem on the
-subject of Courage in, what seemed to me, the most natural manner in the
-world. I thought of lifeboats and fire-engines, and decided on lifeboats
-for the mere reason that "wave" and "save" would rhyme together. A
-lifeboat, then, was to save the crew of a wrecked ship. Next, what
-<i>was</i> poetry? I desired a model structure which I might copy. Turning
-to a school hymn-book I found&mdash;
-</p>
-
-<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
-<span class="i2">A little ship was on the sea,</span><br />
-<span class="i4">It was a pretty sight;</span><br />
-<span class="i2">It sailed along so pleasantly</span><br />
-<span class="i4">And all was calm and bright</span>
-</div></div>
-
-<p>
-That stanza I adopted, and slavishly imitated. In a brief space a poem
-of four such stanzas was accomplished. I wrote it in cold blood,
-hammered it out word after word, and was much pleased with the result.
-On the following day I read the poem aloud to myself, and was thrilled
-with emotion. The dashing cruel wave that rhymed with save appeared to
-me intensely realistic. I failed to conceive how any poem could be
-better than mine. The sequel is that only one other boy besides myself
-had even attempted verse. One after another, each sullenly said that he
-had nothing to show. (How clever <i>I</i> felt!) Then I saw my rival's
-composition; it dealt with a fire in New York and many fire-engines; I
-did not care for it; I could not make sense of much of it; but I saw
-with painful clearness that it was as far above mine as the heaven was
-above the earth. . . .
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Did you write this yourself?" The master was addressing the creator of
-New York fire-engines.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Yes, sir."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"All of it?"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Yes, sir."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"You lie, sir."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-It was magnificent for me. The fool, my rival, relying too fondly on the
-master's ignorance of modern literature, had simply transcribed entire
-the work of some great American recitation-monger. I received the
-laurel, which I fancy amounted to a shilling.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Nothing dashed by the fiasco of his poetry competition, the schoolmaster
-immediately instituted a competition in prose. He told us about M.
-Jourdain, who talked prose without knowing it, and requested us each to
-write a short story upon any theme we might choose to select. I produced
-the story with the same ease and certainty as I had produced the verse.
-I had no difficulty in finding a plot which satisfied me; it was
-concerned with a drowning accident at the seaside, and it
-culminated&mdash;with a remorse&mdash;less naturalism that even thus early
-proclaimed the elective affinity between Flaubert and myself&mdash;in an
-inquest. It described the wonders of the deep, and I have reason to
-remember that it likened the gap between the fin and the side of a fish
-to a pocket. In this competition I had no competitor. I, alone, had
-achieved fiction. I watched the master as he read my work, and I could
-see from his eyes and gestures that he thought it marvellously good for
-the boy. He spoke to me about it in a tone which I had never heard from
-him before and never heard again, and then, putting the manuscript in a
-drawer, he left us to ourselves for a few minutes.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I'll just read it to you," said the big boy of the form, a daring but
-vicious rascal. He usurped the pedagogic armchair, found the manuscript,
-rapped the ruler on the desk, and began to read. I protested in vain.
-The whole class roared with laughter, and I was overcome with shame. I
-know that I, eleven, cried. Presently the reader stopped and scratched
-his head; the form waited.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Oh!" he exclaimed. "Fishes have pockets! Fishes have pockets!"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The phrase was used as a missile against me for months.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The master returned with his assistant, and the latter also perused the
-tale.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Very remarkable!" he sagely commented&mdash;to be sage was his foible,
-"very remarkable, indeed!"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Yet I can remember no further impulse to write a story for at least ten
-years. Despite this astonishing success, martyrdom, and glory, I
-forthwith abandoned fiction and went mad on water-colours.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<div class="footnote">
-
-<p class="nind"><a name="Footnote_1_1" id="Footnote_1_1"></a><a href="#FNanchor_1_1"><span class="label">[1]</span></a>Written in 1900.</p></div>
-
-
-
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="III">III</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-The insanity of water-colours must have continued for many years. I say
-insanity, because I can plainly perceive now that I had not the
-slightest genuine aptitude for graphic art. In the curriculum of South
-Kensington as taught at a provincial art school I never got beyond the
-stage known technically as "third-grade freehand," and even in that my
-"lining-in" was considered to be a little worse than mediocre. O floral
-forms, how laboriously I deprived you of the grace of your Hellenic
-convention! As for the "round" and the "antique," as for pigments, these
-mysteries were withheld from me by South Kensington. It was at home,
-drawn on by a futile but imperious fascination, that I practised them,
-and water-colours in particular. I never went to nature; I had not the
-skill, nor do I remember that I felt any sympathetic appreciation of
-nature. I was content to copy. I wasted the substance of uncles and
-aunts in a complicated and imposing apparatus of easels, mahlsticks,
-boards, What-man, camel-hair, and labelled tubes. I rose early, I
-cheated school and office, I outraged the sanctity of the English
-Sabbath, merely to satisfy an ardour of copying. I existed on the Grand
-Canal in Venice; at Toledo, Nuremburg, and Delft; and on slopes
-commanding a view of Turner's ruined abbeys, those abbeys through whose
-romantic windows streamed a yellow moonlight inimitable by any
-combination of ochre, lemon, and gamboge in my paint-box. Every replica
-that I produced was the history of a disillusion. With what a sanguine
-sweep I laid on the first broad washes&mdash;the pure blue of water, the
-misty rose of sun-steeped palaces, the translucent sapphire of Venetian
-and Spanish skies! And then what a horrible muddying ensued, what a
-fading-away of magic and defloriation of hopes, as in detail after
-detail the picture gradually lost tone and clarity! It is to my credit
-that I was always disgusted by the fatuity of these efforts. I have not
-yet ceased to wonder what precise part of the supreme purpose was served
-by seven or eight years of them.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-From fine I turned to applied art, diverted by a periodical called "The
-Girl's Own Paper." For a long period this monthly, which I now regard as
-quaint, but which I shall never despise, was my principal instrument of
-culture. It alone blew upon the spark of artistic feeling and kept it
-alive. I derived from it my first ideals of aesthetic and of etiquette.
-Under its influence my brother and myself started on a revolutionary
-campaign against all the accepted canons of house decoration. We
-invented friezes, dadoes, and panels; we cut stencils; and we carried
-out our bright designs through half a house. It was magnificent,
-glaring, and immense; it foreshadowed the modern music-hall. Visitors
-were shown through our rooms by parents who tried in vain to hide from
-us their parental complacency. The professional house-decorator was
-reduced to speechless admiration of our originality and extraordinary
-enterprise; he really was struck&mdash;he could appreciate the difficulties
-we had conquered.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-During all this, and with a succession of examinations continually
-looming ahead, literature never occurred to me; it was forgotten. I
-worked in a room lined with perhaps a couple of thousand volumes, but I
-seldom opened any of them. Still, I must have read a great deal,
-mechanically, and without enthusiasm: serials, and boys' books. At
-twenty-one I know that I had read almost nothing of Scott, Jane Austen,
-Dickens, Thackeray, the Brontës, and George Eliot. An adolescence
-devoted to water-colours has therefore made it forever impossible for me
-to emulate, in my functions of critic, the allusive Langism of Mr.
-Andrew Lang; but on the other hand, it has conferred on me the rare
-advantage of being in a position to approach the classics and the
-alleged classics with a mind entirely unprejudiced by early
-recollections. Thus I read David Copperfield for the first time at
-thirty, after I had written a book or two and some hundreds of articles
-myself. The one author whom as a youth I "devoured" was Ouida, creator
-of the incomparable Strathmore, the Strathmore upon whose wrath the sun
-unfortunately went down. I loved Ouida much for the impassioned nobility
-of her style, but more for the scenes of gilded vice into which she
-introduced me. She it was who inspired me with that taste for liaisons
-under pink lampshades which I shall always have, but which, owing to a
-puritanical ancestry and upbringing, I shall never be able to satisfy.
-Not even the lesson of Prince Io's martyrdom in "Friendship" could cure
-me of this predilection that I blush for. Yes, Ouida was the unique
-fountain of romance for me. Of poetry, save "Hiawatha" and the enforced
-and tedious Shakespeare of schools, I had read nothing.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The principal local daily offered to buy approved short stories from
-local readers at a guinea apiece. Immediately I wrote one. What, beyond
-the chance of a guinea, made me turn so suddenly to literature I cannot
-guess; it was eight years since I had sat down as a creative artist. But
-I may mention here that I have never once produced any literary work
-without a preliminary incentive quite other than the incentive of
-ebullient imagination. I have never "wanted to write," until the
-extrinsic advantages of writing had presented themselves to me. I cannot
-recall that I found any difficulty in concocting the story. The heroine
-was named Leonora, and after having lost sight of her for years, the
-hero discovered her again as a great actress in a great play. (Miss
-Ellen Terry in "Faust" had passed disturbingly athwart my existence.) I
-remember no more. The story was refused. But I firmly believe that for a
-boy of nineteen it was something of an achievement. No one saw it except
-myself and the local editor; it was a secret, and now it is a lost
-secret. Soon afterwards another local newspaper advertised for a short
-serial of local interest. Immediately I wrote the serial, again without
-difficulty. It was a sinister narrative to illustrate the evils of
-marrying a drunken woman. (I think I had just read "L'Assommoir" in
-Vizetelly's original edition of Zola.) There was a street in our town
-named Commercial Street. I laid the scene there, and called it
-Speculation Street. I know not what satiric criticism of modern life was
-involved in that change of name. This serial too was refused; I suspect
-that it was entirely without serial interest.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I had matriculated at London University three years before, and was then
-working, without heart, for a law degree (which I never won); instead of
-Ouida my nights were given to Austin's Jurisprudence, the Institutes of
-Justinian and of Gaius, and Maine's Ancient Law; the last is a great and
-simple book, but it cannot be absorbed and digested while the student is
-pre-occupied with the art of fiction. Out of an unwilling respect for
-the University of London, that august negation of the very idea of a
-University, I abandoned literature. As to water-colours, my tubes had
-dried up long since; and house-decoration was at a standstill.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The editor of the second newspaper, after a considerable interval, wrote
-and asked me to call on him, for all the world as though I were the
-impossible hero of a journalistic novel. The interview between us was
-one of these plagiarisms of fiction which real life is sometimes guilty
-of. The editor informed me that he had read my sinister serial with deep
-interest, and felt convinced, his refusal of it notwithstanding, that I
-was marked out for the literary vocation. He offered me a post on his
-powerful organ as a regular weekly contributor, without salary. He said
-that he was sure I could write the sort of stuff he wanted, and I
-entirely agreed with him. My serene confidence in my ability, pen in
-hand, to do anything that I wished to do, was thus manifest in the
-beginning. Glory shone around as I left the editorial office. The
-romantic quality of this episode is somewhat impaired by the fact, which
-I shall nevertheless mention, that the editor was a friend of the
-family, and that my father was one of several optimistic persons who
-were dropping money on the powerful organ every week. The interview,
-however, was indeed that peculiar phenomenon (so well-known to all
-readers of biography) styled the "turning-point in one's career." But I
-lacked the wit to perceive this for several years.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The esteemed newspaper to which I was now attached served several fairly
-large municipalities which lay so close together as to form in reality
-one very large town divided against itself. Each wilful cell in this
-organism was represented by its own special correspondent on the
-newspaper, and I was to be the correspondent for my native town. I had
-nothing to do with the news department; menial reporters attended to
-that. My task was to comment weekly upon the town's affairs to the
-extent of half a column of paragraphic notes.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Whatever you do, you must make your pars bright," said the editor, and
-he repeated the word&mdash;"Bright!"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Now I was entirely ignorant of my town's affairs. I had no suspicion of
-the incessant comedy of municipal life. For two days I traversed our
-stately thoroughfares in search of material, wondering what, in the
-names of Horace Greeley, James Gordon Bennett, and Mr. Delane, my first
-contribution was going to consist of. Law went to the devil, its natural
-home. Then I happened to think of tram-lines. The tram-lines, under the
-blessing of Heaven, were badly laid, and constituted a menace to all
-wheeled traffic save trams; also the steam-engines of the trams were
-offensive. I wrote sundry paragraphs on that topic, and having thus
-acquired momentum, I arrived safely at the end of my half column by the
-aid of one or two minor trifles.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-In due course I called at the office to correct proof, and I
-was put into the hands of the sub-editor. It was one of those
-quarters-of-an-hour that make life worth living; for the sub-editor
-appreciated me; nay, he regarded me as something of a journalistic
-prodigy, and his adjectives as he ran through the proof were extremely
-agreeable. Presently he came to a sentence in which I had said that
-such-and-such a proceeding "smacked of red tape."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"'Smacked of red tape'?" He looked up at me doubtfully. "Rather a mixed
-metaphor, isn't it?"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I didn't in the least know what he meant, but I knew that sentence
-was my particular pet. "Not at all!" I answered with feeling. "Nothing
-of the sort! It <i>does</i> smack of red tape&mdash;you must admit that."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And the sentence stood. I had awed the sub-editor.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-My notes enjoyed a striking success. Their brightness scintillated
-beyond the brightness of the comments from any other town. People
-wondered who this caustic, cynical, and witty anonymous wag was. I
-myself was vastly well satisfied; I read the stuff over and over again;
-but at the same time I perceived that I could make my next contribution
-infinitely more brilliant. And I did. I mention this matter, less
-because it was my first appearance in print, than because it first
-disclosed to me the relation between literature and life. In writing my
-stories I had never thought for a moment of life. I had made something,
-according to a model, not dreaming that fiction was supposed to reflect
-real life. I had regarded fiction as&mdash;fiction, a concoction on the
-plane of the Grand Canal, or the Zocodover at Toledo. But in this other
-literature I was obliged to begin with life itself. The wheel of a
-dog-cart spinning off as it jammed against a projecting bit of
-tram-line; a cyclist overset: what was there in that? Nothing. Yet I had
-taken that nothing and transformed it into something&mdash;something that
-seemed important, permanent, <i>literary</i>. I did not comprehend the
-process, but I saw its result. I do not comprehend it now. The man who
-could explain it could answer the oft-repeated cry: What is Art?
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Soon afterwards I had a delightful illustration of the power of the
-press. That was the era of coffee-houses, when many excellent persons
-without too much humour tried all over the country to wean the populace
-from beer by the superior attractions of coffee and cocoa; possibly they
-had never tasted beer. Every town had its coffee-house company, limited.
-Our coffee-house happened to be a pretty bad one, while the coffee-house
-of the next town was conspicuously good. I said so in print, with my
-usual display of verbal pyrotechny. The paper had not been published an
-hour before the aggrieved manager of our coffee-house had seen his
-directors on the subject. He said I lied, that I was unpatriotic, and
-that he wanted my head on a charger; or words to that effect. He asked
-my father, who was a director of both newspaper and coffee-house,
-whether he could throw any light on the identity of the scurrilous and
-cowardly scribe, and my father, to his eternal credit, said that he
-could not. Again I lived vividly and fully. As for our coffee-house, it
-mended its ways.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The County Council Bill had just become law, and our town enjoyed the
-diversions of electing its first County Councillor. The rival candidates
-were a brewer and a prominent lay religionist. My paper supported the
-latter, and referred to the conflict between the forces of civilization
-and the forces of barbarism. It had a magnificent heading across two
-columns: "Brains versus Beer," and expressed the most serene confidence
-as to the result. Of course, my weekly notes during the campaign were a
-shield and a buckler to the religionist, who moreover lived next door.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The result of the poll was to be announced late on the night before the
-paper went to press. The editor gave me instructions that <i>if</i> we
-lost, I was to make fun of the brewer, and in any case to deliver my
-copy by eleven o'clock next morning. We lost heavily, disastrously; the
-forces of civilization were simply nowhere. I attended the declaration
-of the poll, and as the elated brewer made his speech of ceremony in
-front of the town hall, I observed that his hat was stove-in and askew.
-I fastened on that detail, and went to bed in meditation upon the
-facetious notes which I was to write early on the morrow. In the middle
-of the night I was wakened up. My venerable grandfather, who lived at
-the other end of the town, had been taken suddenly ill and was dying. As
-his eldest grandson, my presence at the final scene was indispensable. I
-went, and talked in low tones with my elders. Upstairs the old man was
-fighting for every breath. The doctor descended at intervals and said
-that it was only a question of hours. I was absolutely obsessed by a
-delicious feeling of the tyranny of the press. Nothing domestic could be
-permitted to interfere with my duty as a journalist.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I must write those facetious comments while my grandfather is dying
-upstairs!" This thought filled my brain. It seemed to me to be fine,
-splendid. I was intensely proud of being laid under a compulsion so
-startlingly dramatic. Could I manufacture jokes while my grandfather
-expired? Certainly: I was a journalist. And never since have I been more
-ardently a journalist than I was that night and morning. With a strong
-sense of the theatrical, I wrote my notes at dawn. They delicately
-excoriated the brewer.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The curious thing is that my grandfather survived not only that, but
-several other fatal attacks.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-A few weeks later, my newspaper was staggering under the blow of my
-migration to London.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="IV">IV</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-I came to London at the age of twenty-one, with no definite ambition,
-and no immediate object save to escape from an intellectual and artistic
-environment which had long been excessively irksome to me. Some
-achievement of literature certainly lay in the abyss of my desires, but
-I allowed it to remain there, vague and almost unnoticed. As for
-provincial journalism, without meed in coin, it had already lost the
-charm of novelty, and I had been doing it in a perfunctory manner. I
-made no attempt to storm Fleet Street. The fact is that I was too much
-engaged in making a meal off London, swallowing it, to attend to
-anything else; this repast continued for over two years. I earned a
-scanty living as shorthand clerk, at first, in a solicitor's office; but
-a natural gift for the preparation of bills of costs for taxation, that
-highly delicate and complicated craft, and an equally natural gift for
-advancing my own interests, soon put me in receipt of an income that
-many "admitted" clerks would have envied: to be exact and prosaic, two
-hundred a year. Another clerk in the office happened to be an ardent
-bibliophile. We became friends, and I owe him much. He could chatter in
-idiomatic French like a house on fire, and he knew the British Museum
-Reading Room from its centre to its periphery. He first taught me to
-regard a book, not as an instrument for obtaining information or
-emotion, but as a <i>book</i>, printed at such a place in such a year by
-so-and-so, bound by so-and-so, and carrying colophons, registers,
-water-marks, and <i>fautes d'impression</i>. He was acquainted, I think,
-with every second-hand bookstall in the metropolis; and on Saturday
-afternoons we visited most of them. We lived for bargains and rarities.
-We made it a point of honour to buy one book every day, and when
-bargains failed we used to send out the messengers for a Camelot Classic
-or so&mdash;ninepence net; this series was just then at the height of its
-vogue. We were for ever bringing into the office formidable tomes&mdash;the
-choice productions of the presses of Robert and Henry Stephen, Elzevir,
-Baskerville, Giunta, Foulis, and heaven knows whom. My discovery of the
-Greek <i>editio princeps</i> of Plutarch, printed by Philip Giunta at
-Florence in 1517, which I bought in Whitechapel for two shillings,
-nearly placed me on a level with my preceptor. We decidedly created a
-sensation in the office. The "admitted" clerks and the articled clerks,
-whom legal etiquette forbids as a rule to fraternize with the
-"unadmitted," took a naïve and unaffected pleasure in our society. One
-day I was examining five enormous folios full-bound in yellow calf, in
-the clients' waiting-room, when the senior partner surprised me thus
-wasting the firm's time.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"What's all this?" he inquired politely. He was far too polite to
-remonstrate.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"This, sir? Bayle's 'Dictionaire Historique et Critique,'" I replied.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Is it yours?"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Yes, sir. I bought it in the lunch-hour at Hodgson's."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Ah!"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-He retired abashed. He was a gentle fellow, and professed an admiration
-for Browning; but the chief thing of which he had the right to be proud
-was his absolutely beautiful French accent.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I had scarcely been in London a year when my friend and I decided to
-collaborate in a bibliographical dictionary of rare and expensive books
-in all European languages. Such a scheme sounds farcical, but we were
-perfectly serious over it; and the proof of our seriousness is that we
-worked at it every morning before breakfast. I may mention also that we
-lunched daily at the British Museum, much to the detriment of our
-official duties. For months we must have been quite mad&mdash;obsessed. We
-got about as far as the New English Dictionary travelled in the first
-twenty years of its life, that is to say, two-thirds through A; and then
-suddenly, irrationally, without warning, we dropped it. The mere
-conception of this dictionary was so splendid that there was a grandeur
-even in dropping it.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Soon after this, the managing clerk of the office, a university man,
-autocratic, but kindly and sagacious, bought a country practice and left
-us. He called me into his room to say good-bye.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"You'd no business to be here," he said, sharply. "You ought to be doing
-something else. If I find you here when I visit town next, I shall look
-on you as a d&mdash;&mdash;d fool. Don't forget what I say."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I did not. On the contrary, his curt speech made a profound impression
-on me. He was thirty, and a man of the world; I was scarcely
-twenty-three. My self-esteem, always vigorous, was flattered into all
-sorts of new developments. I gradually perceived that, quite without
-intending it, I had acquired a reputation. As what? Well, as a learned
-youth not lacking in brilliance. And this reputation had, I am
-convinced, sprung solely from the habit of buying books printed mainly
-in languages which neither myself nor my acquaintances could read. I
-owned hundreds of books, but I seldom read any of them, except the
-bibliographical manuals; I had no leisure to read. I scanned. I can only
-remember, in this period, that I really studied one book&mdash;Plato's
-"Republic," which I read because I thought I was doing the correct
-thing. Beyond this, and a working knowledge of French, and an entirely
-sterile apparatus of bibliographical technique, I had mastered nothing.
-Three qualities I did possess, and on these three qualities I have
-traded ever since. First, an omnivorous and tenacious memory (now, alas,
-effete!)&mdash;the kind of memory that remembers how much London spends per
-day in cab fares just as easily as the order of Shakespeare's plays or
-the stock anecdotes of Shelley and Byron. Second, a naturally sound
-taste in literature. And third, the invaluable, despicable, disingenuous
-journalistic faculty of seeming to know much more than one does know.
-None knew better than I that, in any exact, scholarly sense, I knew
-nothing of literature. Nevertheless, I should have been singularly blind
-not to see that I knew far more about literature than nine-tenths of the
-people around me. These people pronounced me an authority, and I
-speedily accepted myself as an authority: were not my shelves a silent
-demonstration? By insensible degrees I began to assume the pose of an
-authority. I have carried that pose into newspaper offices and the very
-arcana of literary culture, and never yet met with a disaster. Yet in
-the whole of my life I have not devoted one day to the systematic study
-of literature. In truth, it is absurdly easy to impress even persons who
-in the customary meaning of the term have the right to call themselves
-well-educated. I remember feeling very shy one night in a drawing-room
-rather new to me. My host had just returned from Venice, and was
-describing the palace where Browning lived; but he could not remember
-the name of it.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Rezzonico," I said at once, and I chanced to intercept the look of
-astonishment that passed between host and hostess.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I frequented that drawing-room a great deal afterwards, and was always
-expected to speak <i>ex cathedra</i> on English literature.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-London the entity was at least as good as my dreams of it, but the
-general mass of the persons composing it, considered individually, were
-a sad disappointment. "What duffers!" I said to myself again and again.
-"What duffers!" I had come prepared to sit provincially at the feet of
-these Londoners! I was humble enough when I arrived, but they soon cured
-me of that&mdash;they were so ready to be impressed! What struck me was the
-extraordinary rarity of the men who really could "do their job." And
-when I found them, they were invariably provincials like me who had come
-up with the same illusions and suffered the same enlightenment. All who
-were successfully performing that feat known as "getting on" were
-provincials. I enrolled myself in their ranks. I said that I would get
-on. The "d&mdash;&mdash;d fool" phrase of the Chancery clerk rang in my
-ears like a bugle to march.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And for about a year I didn't move a step. I read more than I have ever
-read before or since. But I did nothing. I made no effort, nor did I
-subject myself to any mental discipline. I simply gorged on English and
-French literature for the amusement I could extract from such gluttony,
-and found physical exercise in becoming the champion of an excessively
-suburban lawn-tennis club. I wasted a year in contemplating the
-magnificence of my future doings. Happily I never spoke these dreams
-aloud! They were only the private solace of my idleness. Now it was that
-I at last decided upon the vocation of letters; not scholarship, not the
-dilettantism of belles-lettres, but sheer constructive journalism and
-possibly fiction. London, however, is chiefly populated by grey-haired
-men who for twenty years have been about to become journalists and
-authors. And but for a fortunate incident&mdash;the thumb of my Fate has
-always been turned up&mdash;I might ere this have fallen back into that
-tragic rearguard of Irresolutes.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Through the good offices of my appreciative friends who had forgotten
-the name of the Palazzo Rezzonico, I was enabled to take up my quarters
-in the abode of some artists at Chelsea. I began to revolve, dazzled, in
-a circle of painters and musicians who, without the least affectation,
-spelt Art with the majuscule; indeed, it never occurred to them that
-people existed who would spell it otherwise. I was compelled to set to
-work on the reconstruction of nearly all my ideals. I had lived in a
-world where beauty was not mentioned, seldom thought of. I believe I had
-scarcely heard the adjective "beautiful" applied to anything whatever,
-save confections like Gounod's "There is a green hill far away." Modern
-oak sideboards were called handsome, and Christmas cards were called
-pretty; and that was about all. But now I found myself among souls that
-talked of beauty openly and unashamed. On the day that I arrived at the
-house in Chelsea, the drawing-room had just been papered, and the
-pattern of the frieze resembled nothing in my experience. I looked at
-it.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Don't you think our frieze is charming?" the artist said, his eyes
-glistening.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-It was the man's obvious sincerity that astounded me. O muse of mahogany
-and green rep! Here was a creature who took a serious interest in the
-pattern of his wall-papers! I expressed my enthusiasm for the frieze.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Yes," he replied, with simple solemnity, "<i>it is very beautiful</i>."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-This worship of beauty was continuous. The very teaspoons were banned or
-blessed on their curves, and as for my rare editions, they wilted under
-tests to which they were wholly unaccustomed. I possessed a
-<i>rarissime</i> illustrated copy of Manon Lescaut, of which I was very
-proud, and I showed it with pride to the artist. He remarked that it was
-one of the ugliest books he had ever seen.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"But," I cried, "you've no idea how scarce it is! It's worth&mdash;"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-He laughed.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I perceived that I must begin life again, and I began it again,
-sustained in my first efforts by the all-pervading atmosphere of ardour.
-My new intimates were not only keenly appreciative of beauty, they were
-bent on creating it. They dreamed of great art-works, lovely
-compositions, impassioned song. Music and painting they were familiar
-with, and from me they were serenely sure of literature. The glorious
-accent with which they clothed that word&mdash;literature! Aware beforehand
-of my authority, my enthusiasm, they accepted me with quick, warm
-sympathy as a fellow-idealist. Then they desired to know what I was
-engaged upon, what my aims were, and other facts exceedingly difficult
-to furnish.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-It happened that the most popular of all popular weeklies had recently
-given a prize of a thousand pounds for a sensational serial. When the
-serial had run its course, the editor offered another prize of twenty
-guineas for the best humorous condensation of it in two thousand words.
-I thought I might try for that, but I feared that my friends would not
-consider it "art." I was mistaken. They pointed out that caricature was
-a perfectly legitimate form of art, often leading to much original
-beauty, and they urged me to enter the lists. They read the novel in
-order the better to enjoy the caricature of it, and when, after six,
-evenings' labour, my work was done, they fiercely exulted in it. Out of
-the fulness of technical ignorance they predicted with certainty that I
-should win the prize.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Here again life plagiarized the sentimental novel, for I did win the
-guineas. My friends were delighted, but they declined to admit a
-particle of surprise. Their belief in what I could do kept me awake at
-nights.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-This was my first pen-money, earned within two months of my change of
-air. I felt that the omen was favourable.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="V">V</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-Now I come to the humiliating part of my literary career, the period of
-what in Fleet Street is called "free-lancing." I use the term
-"humiliating" deliberately. A false aureole of romance encircles the
-head of that miserable opportunist, the free-lance. I remember I tried
-to feel what a glorious thing it was to be a free-lance, dependent on
-none (but dependent on all), relying always on one's own invention and
-ingenuity, poised always to seize the psychological moment, and gambling
-for success with the calm (so spurious) of a dicer in the eighteenth
-century. Sometimes I deceived myself into complacency, but far more
-often I realized the true nature of the enterprise and set my teeth to
-endure the spiritual shame of it. The free-lance is a tramp touting for
-odd jobs; a pedlar crying stuff which is bought usually in default of
-better; a producer endeavouring to supply a market of whose conditions
-he is in ignorance more or less complete; a commercial traveller liable
-constantly to the insolence of an elegant West End draper's "buyer." His
-attitude is in essence a fawning attitude; it must be so; he is the poor
-relation, the doff-hat, the ready-for-anything. He picks up the crumbs
-that fall from the table of the "staff"&mdash;the salaried, jealous,
-intriguing staff&mdash;or he sits down, honoured, when the staff has
-finished. He never goes to bed; he dares not; if he did, a crumb would
-fall. His experience is as degrading as a competitive examination, and
-only less degrading than that of the black-and-white artist who trudges
-Fleet Street with a portfolio under his arm. And the shame of the
-free-lance is none the less real because he alone witnesses it&mdash;he and
-the postman, that postman with elongated missive, that herald of
-ignominy, that dismaying process-server, who raps the rap of
-apprehension and probable doom six, eight, and even twelve times per
-diem!
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The popular paper that had paid me twenty guineas for being facetious
-expressed a polite willingness to consider my articles, and I began to
-turn the life of a law-office into literature; my provincial experience
-had taught me the trick. Here was I engaged all day in drawing up bills
-of costs that would impose on a taxing-master to the very last
-three-and-fourpence; and there was the public in whose chaotic mind a
-lawyer's bill existed as a sort of legend, hieroglyphic and
-undecipherable. What more natural than a brief article&mdash;"How a bill
-of costs is drawn up," a trifling essay of three hundred words over
-which I laboured for a couple of evenings? It was accepted, printed, and
-with a postal order for ten shillings on the ensuing Thursday I saw the
-world opening before me like a flower. The pathos of my sanguine
-ignorance! I followed up this startling success with a careful imitation
-of it&mdash;"How a case is prepared for trial," and that too brought its
-ten shillings. But the vein suddenly ceased. My fledgling fancy could do
-no more with law, and I cast about in futile blindness for other
-subjects. I grew conscious for the first time of my lack of technical
-skill. My facility seemed to leave me, and my self-confidence. Every
-night I laboured dully and obstinately, excogitating, inventing,
-grinding out, bent always to the squalid and bizarre tastes of the
-million, and ever striving after "catchiness" and "actuality." My soul,
-in the arrogance of a certain achievement, glances back furtively, with
-loathing, at that period of emotional and intellectual dishonour. The
-one bright aspect of it is that I wrote everything with a nice regard
-for English; I would lavish a night on a few paragraphs; and years of
-this penal servitude left me with a dexterity in the handling of
-sentences that still surprises the possessor of it. I have heard of
-Fleet Street hacks who regularly produce sixty thousand words a week;
-but I well know that there are not many men who can come fresh to a pile
-of new books, tear the entrails out of them, and write a
-fifteen-hundred-word <i>causerie</i> on them, passably stylistic, all
-inside sixty minutes. This means skill, and I am proud of it. But my
-confessions as a reviewer will come later.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-No! Free-lancing was not precisely a triumph for me. Call it my
-purgatorio. I shone sometimes with a feeble flicker, in half-crown
-paragraphs, and in jumpy articles under alliterative titles that now and
-then flared on a pink or yellow contents-bill. But I can state with some
-certainty that my earnings in the mass did not exceed threepence an
-hour. During all this time I was continually spurred by the artists
-around me, who naïvely believed in me, and who were cognizant only of my
-successes. I never spoke of defeat; I used to retire to my room with
-rejected stuff as impassive as a wounded Indian; while opening envelopes
-at breakfast I had the most perfect command of my features. Mere vanity
-always did and always will prevent me from acknowledging a reverse at
-the moment; not till I have retrieved my position can I refer to a
-discomfiture. Consequently, my small world regarded me as much more
-successful than I really was. Had I to live again, which Apollo forbid,
-I would pursue the same policy.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-During all this time, too, I was absorbing French fiction incessantly;
-in French fiction I include the work of Turgenev, because I read him
-always in French translations. Turgenev, the brothers de Goncourt, and
-de Maupassant were my gods. I accepted their canons, and they filled me
-with a general scorn of English fiction which I have never quite lost.
-From the composition of 'bits' articles I turned to admire "Fathers and
-Children" or "Une Vie," and the violence of the contrast never struck me
-at the time. I did not regard myself as an artist, or as emotional by
-temperament. My ambition was to be a journalist merely&mdash;cool, smart,
-ingenious, equal to every emergency. I prided myself on my impassivity.
-I was acquainted with men who wept at fine music&mdash;I felt sure that
-Saint Cecilia and the heavenly choir could not draw a single tear from my
-journalistic eye. I failed to perceive that my appreciation of French
-fiction, and the harangues on fiction which I delivered to my intimates,
-were essentially emotional in character, and I forgot that the sight of
-a successful dramatist before the curtain on a first-night always caused
-me to shake with a mysterious and profound agitation. I mention these
-facts to show how I misunderstood, or ignored, the progress of my
-spiritual development. A crisis was at hand. I suffered from insomnia
-and other intellectual complaints, and went to consult a physician who
-was also a friend.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"You know," he said, in the course of talk, "you are one of the most
-highly-strung men I have ever met."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-When I had recovered from my stupefaction, I glowed with pride. What a
-fine thing to be highly-strung, nervously organized! I saw myself in a
-new light; I thought better of myself; I rather looked down on cool,
-ingenious journalists. Perhaps I dimly suspected that Fleet Street was
-not to be the end of all things for me. It was soon afterwards that the
-artists whom I had twitted about their temperament accused me of sharing
-it with them to the full. Another surprise! I was in a state of ferment
-then. But I had acquired such a momentum in the composition of articles
-destined to rejection that I continued throughout this crisis to produce
-them with a regularity almost stupid. My friends began to inquire into
-the nature of my ultimate purpose. They spoke of a large work, and I
-replied that I had no spare time. None could question my industry. "Why
-don't you write a novel on Sundays?" one of them suggested.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The idea was grandiose. To conceive such an idea was a proof of
-imagination. And the air with which these enthusiasts said these things
-was entirely splendid and magnificent. But I was just then firmly
-convinced that I had no vocation for the novel; I had no trace of a
-desire to emulate Turgenev. Again and again my fine enthusiasts returned
-to the charge, urged on by I know not what instinct. At last, to please
-them, to quieten them, I promised to try to write a short story. Without
-too much difficulty I concocted one concerning an artist's model, and
-sent it to a weekly which gives a guinea each week for a prize story. My
-tale won the guinea.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"There! We told you so!" was the chorus. And I stood convicted of
-underestimating my own powers; fault rare enough in my career!
-</p>
-
-<p>
-However, I insisted that the story was despicably bad, a commercial
-product, and the reply was that I ought next to write one for art's
-sake. Instead, I wrote one for morality's sake. It was a story with a
-lofty purpose, dealing with the tragedy of a courtesan's life. (No, I
-had not then read "Splendeurs et Misères des Courtisanes.") A prominent
-philanthropist with a tendency to faddism, who for morality's sake was
-running a monthly magazine, was much impressed by my tale, and after
-some trouble&mdash;the contributors were supposed to contribute <i>con
-amore</i>&mdash;I got another guinea. This story only pleased me for a few
-weeks; its crudity was too glaring. But I continued to write short
-stories, and several of them appeared in halfpenny evening papers.
-Gaining in skill, I aimed political skits in narrative form at the more
-exclusive, the consciously superior, penny evening papers, and one or
-two of these hit the mark. I admired the stuff greatly. Lo, I had risen
-from a concocter of 'bits' articles to be the scorpion-sting of cabinet
-ministers! My self-confidence began to return.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Then, one day, one beneficent and adorable day, my brain was visited by
-a Plot. I had a prevision that I was about to write a truly excellent
-short story. I took incredible pains to be realistic, stylistic, and all
-the other <i>istics</i>, and the result amazed me. I knew that at last I
-had accomplished a good thing&mdash;I knew by the glow within me, the
-emotional fatigue, the vista of sweet labour behind me. What moved me to
-despatch this jewel, this bit of caviare-to-the-general, to the editor
-of a popular weekly with a circulation of a quarter of a million, I
-cannot explain. But so I did. The editor returned it with a note to say
-that he liked the plot, but the style was below his standard. I laughed,
-and, more happily inspired, sent it to the Yellow Book, where it duly
-appeared. The Yellow Book was then in apogee. Several fiercely literary
-papers singled out my beautiful story for especial praise.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"By heaven!" I said, "I will write a novel." It was a tremendous
-resolution.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I saw that I could <i>write</i>.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="VI">VI</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-But before continuing the narration of my adventures in fiction, I must
-proceed a little further in the dusty tracks of journalism. When I had
-laboured sordidly and for the most part ineffectively as a free-lance for
-two or three years, I became, with surprising suddenness, the
-assistant-editor of a ladies' paper. The cause of this splendid
-metamorphosis was sadly unromantic. I had not bombarded the paper, from
-the shelter of a pseudonym, with articles of unexampled brilliance. The
-editor had not invited his mysterious and talented contributor into the
-editorial sanctum, and there informed him that his exclusive services,
-at a generous salary, were deemed absolutely essential to the future
-welfare of the organ which he had hitherto assisted only on occasion. I
-had never written a line for the paper, nor for any ladies' paper. I
-obtained the situation by "influence," and that of the grossest kind.
-All that I personally did was to furnish a list of the newspapers and
-periodicals to which I had contributed, and some specimens of my printed
-work. These specimens proved rather more than satisfactory. The editor
-adored smartness; smartness was the "note" of his paper; and he
-discovered several varieties of smartness in my productions. At our
-first interview, and always afterwards, his attitude towards me was full
-of appreciation and kindness. The post was a good one, a hundred and
-fifty a year for one whole day and four half-days a week. Yet I was
-afraid to take it. I was afraid to exchange two hundred a year for a
-hundred and fifty and half my time, I who ardently wished to be a
-journalist and to have leisure for the imitation of our lady George
-Sand! In the end I was hustled into the situation. My cowardice was
-shameful; but in recording it I am not unconscious of the fact that
-truth makes for piquancy.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I am sorry to say that I shall have to leave you at Christmas, sir."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Indeed!" exclaimed the lawyer who admired Browning. "How is that?"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I am going on to the staff of a paper." Perhaps I have never felt
-prouder than when I uttered those words. My pride must have been
-disgusting. This was the last time I ever said "sir" to any man under
-the rank of a knight. The defection of a reliable clerk who combined
-cunning in the preparation of costs with a hundred and thirty words a
-minute at shorthand was decidedly a blow to my excellent; employer; good
-costs clerks are rarer than true poets; but he suffered it with
-impassive stoicism; I liked him for that.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-On a New Year's Day I strolled along Piccadilly to the first day's work
-on my paper. "My paper"&mdash;O the joyful sound! But the boats were burnt
-up; their ashes were even cool; and my mind, in the midst of all this
-bliss, was vexed by grave apprehensions. Suppose the paper to expire, as
-papers often did! I knew that the existence of this particular paper was
-precarious; its foundations were not fixed in the dark backward and abysm
-of time&mdash;it was two years old. Nevertheless, and indisputably and
-solely, I was at last a journalist, and entitled so to describe myself
-in parish registers, county court summonses, jury papers, and income-tax
-returns. In six months I might be a tramp sleeping in Trafalgar Square,
-but on that gorgeous day I was a journalist; nay, I was second in
-command over a cohort of women whose cleverness, I trusted, would be
-surpassed only by their charm.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The office was in the West End&mdash;index of smartness; one arrived at ten
-thirty or so, and ascended to the suite in a lift. One smoked cigars and
-cigarettes incessantly. There was no discipline, and no need of
-discipline, since the indoor staff consisted only of the editor, myself,
-and the editor's lady-secretary. The contrast between this and the exact
-ritual of a solicitor's office was marked and delightful. In an
-adjoining suite on the same floor an eminent actress resided, and an
-eminent actor strolled in to us, grandiosely, during the morning,
-accepted a cigar and offered a cigarette (according to his frugal
-custom), chatted grandiosely, and grandiosely departed. Parcels were
-constantly arriving&mdash;books, proofs, process-blocks, samples of soap
-and of corsets: this continuous procession of parcels impressed me as much
-as anything. From time to time well-dressed and alert women called, to
-correct proofs, to submit drawings, or to scatter excuses. This was
-"Evadne," who wrote about the toilet; that was "Angélique," who did the
-cookery; the other was "Enid," the well-known fashion artist. In each
-case I was of course introduced as the new assistant-editor; they were
-adorable, without exception. At one o'clock, having apparently done
-little but talk and smoke, we went out, the Editor and I, to lunch at
-the Cri.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"This," I said to myself quite privately, "this may be a novel by
-Balzac, but it is not my notion of journalism."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The doings of the afternoon, however, bore a closer resemblance to my
-notion of journalism. That day happened to be press-day, and I perceived
-that we gradually became very busy. Messenger-boys waited while I wrote
-paragraphs to accompany portraits, or while I regularized the syntax of
-a recipe for sole <i>à la Normande</i>, or while I ornamented two naked
-lines from the "Morning Post" with four lines of embroidery. The editor
-was enchanted with my social paragraphs; he said I was born to it, and
-perhaps I was. I innocently asked in what part of the paper they were to
-shine.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Gwendolen's column," he replied.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Who is Gwendolen?" I demanded. Weeks before, I had admired Gwendolen's
-breadth of view and worldly grasp of things, qualities rare in a woman.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"You are," he said, "and I am. It's only an office signature."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Now, that was what I called journalism. I had been taken in, but I was
-glad to have been taken in.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-At four o'clock he began frantically to dictate the weekly London Letter
-which he contributed to an Indian newspaper; the copy caught the Indian
-mail at six. And this too was what I called journalism. I felt myself to
-be in my element; I lived. At an hour which I forget we departed
-together to the printers, and finished off. It was late when the paper
-"went down." The next morning the lady-secretary handed to me the first
-rough folded "pull" of the issue, and I gazed at it as a mother might
-gaze at her firstborn.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"But is this all?" ran my thoughts. The fact was, I had expected some
-process of initiation. I had looked on "journalism" as a sort of temple
-of mysteries into which, duly impressed, I should be ceremoniously
-guided. I was called assistant-editor for the sake of grandiloquence,
-but of course I knew I was chiefly a mere sub-editor, and I had
-anticipated that the sub-editorial craft would be a complex technical
-business requiring long study and practice. On the contrary, there
-seemed to me to be almost nothing in its technique. The tricks of
-making-up, making-ready, measuring blocks, running-round, cutting,
-saving a line, and so on: my chief assumed in the main that I understood
-all these, and I certainly did grasp them instinctively; they appeared
-childishly simple. Years afterwards, a contributor confided to me that
-the editor had told her that he taught me nothing after the first day,
-and that I was a born journalist. I do not seriously think that I was a
-born journalist, and I mention this detail, not from any vain-glory over
-a trifle, but to show that the <i>arcana</i> of journalism partake of the
-nature of an imposture. The same may be said of all professional
-<i>arcana</i>, even those of politics or of the swell-mob.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-In a word, I was a journalist&mdash;but I felt just the same as before.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I vaguely indicated my feelings on this point to the chief.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Ah!" he said. "But you know you'd been through the mill before you came
-here."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-So I had been through the mill! Writing articles at night and getting
-them back the next morning but one, for a year or two&mdash;that was going
-through the mill! Let it be so, then. When other men envied my position,
-and expressed their opinion that I had "got on to a soft thing," I
-indicated that the present was the fruit of the past, and that I had
-been through the mill.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Journalism for women, by women under the direction of men, is an affair
-at once anxious, agreeable and delicate for the men who direct. It is a
-journalism by itself, apart from other journalisms. And it is the only
-journalism that I intimately know. The commercial side of it, the queer
-financial basis of it, have a peculiar interest, but my scheme does not
-by any means include the withdrawal of those curtains. I am concerned
-with letters, and letters, I fear, have little connection with women's
-journalism. I learnt nothing of letters in that office, save a few of
-the more obvious journalistic devices, but I learnt a good deal about
-frocks, household management, and the secret nature of women, especially
-the secret nature of women. As for frocks, I have sincerely tried to
-forget that branch of human knowledge; nevertheless the habit, acquired
-then, of glancing first at a woman's skirt and her shoes, has never left
-me. My apprenticeship to frocks was studded with embarrassing
-situations, of which I will mention only one. It turns upon some designs
-for a layette. A layette, perhaps I ought to explain, is an outfit for a
-new-born babe, and naturally it is prepared in advance of the stranger's
-arrival. Underneath a page of layette illustrations I once put the
-legend, correct in nine hundred and ninety-nine cases out of a
-thousand&mdash;but this was the thousandth&mdash;<i>Cut-to-measure patterns
-supplied</i>. The solecism stands to all eternity against me on the file
-of the paper; and the recollection of it, like the recollection of a
-<i>gaucherie</i>, is persistently haunting.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And here I shall quit for a time the feminine atmosphere, and the path
-which I began by calling dusty, but which is better called flowery. My
-activity in that path showed no further development until after I had
-written my first novel.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="VII">VII</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-"By heaven!" I said, "I will write a novel!"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And I sat down to my oaken bureau with the air of a man who has resolved
-to commit a stupendous crime. Perhaps indeed it was a crime, this my
-first serious challenge to a neglectful and careless world. At any rate
-it was meant to be the beginning of the end, the end being
-twofold&mdash;fame and a thousand a year. You must bear well in mind
-that I was by no means the ordinary person, and my novel was by no means
-to be the ordinary novel. In these cases the very essence of the
-situation is always that one is not ordinary. I had just discovered that
-I could write&mdash;and when I use the term "write" here, I use it in a
-special sense, to be appreciated only by those elect who can themselves
-"write," and difficult of comprehension by all others. I had had a
-<i>conte</i>&mdash;exquisitely Gallic as to spirit and form&mdash;in the
-"Yellow Book," and that <i>conte</i> had been lauded in the "South
-Audley Street Gazette" or some organ of destructive criticism. My
-friends believed in Art, themselves, and me. I believed in myself, Art,
-and them. Could any factor be lacking to render the scene sublime and
-historic?
-</p>
-
-<p>
-So I sat down to write my first novel, under the sweet influences of the
-de Goncourts, Turgenev, Flaubert, and de Maupassant. It was to be
-entirely unlike all English novels except those of one author, whose
-name I shall not mention now, for the reason that I have afore-time made
-my admiration of that author very public. I clearly remember that the
-purpose uppermost in my mind was to imitate what I may call the physical
-characteristics of French novels. There were to be no poetical
-quotations in my novel, no titles to the chapters; the narrative was to
-be divided irregularly into sections by Roman numerals only; and it was
-indispensable that a certain proportion of these sections should begin
-or end abruptly. As thus, for a beginning:&mdash;"Gerald suddenly
-changed the conversation, and taking the final match from his match-box
-at last agreed to light a cigar." And for an ending:&mdash;"Her
-tremulous eyes sought his; breathing a sigh she murmured . . ." O
-succession of dots, charged with significance vague but tremendous,
-there were to be hundreds of you in my novel, because you play so
-important a part in the literature of the country of Victor Hugo and M.
-Loubet! So much for the physical characteristics. To come nearer to the
-soul of it, my novel was to be a mosaic consisting exclusively of
-Flaubert's <i>mots justes</i>&mdash;it was to be <i>mots justes</i>
-composed into the famous <i>écriture artiste</i> of the de Goncourts.
-The sentences were to perform the trick of "the rise and fall." The
-adjectives were to have colour, the verbs were to have colour, and
-perhaps it was a <i>sine qua non</i> that even the pronouns should be
-prismatic&mdash;I forget. And all these effects were to be obtained
-without the most trifling sacrifice of truth. There was to be no bowing
-in the house of the Rimmon of sentimentality. Life being grey, sinister,
-and melancholy, my novel must be grey, sinister, and melancholy. As a
-matter of strict fact, life deserved none of these epithets; I was
-having a very good time; but at twenty-seven one is captious, and liable
-to err in judgment&mdash;a liability which fortunately disappears at
-thirty-five or so. No startling events were to occur in my novel, nor
-anything out of the way that might bring the blush of shame to the
-modesty of nature; no ingenious combinations, no dramatic surprises, and
-above all no coincidences. It was to be the Usual miraculously
-transformed by Art into the Sublime.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The sole liberty that I might permit myself in handling the Usual was
-to give it a rhythmic contour&mdash;a precious distinction in those
-Yeller-bocky days.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-All these cardinal points being settled, I passed to the business of
-choosing a subject. Need I say that I chose myself? But, in obedience to
-my philosophy, I made myself a failure. I regarded my hero with an air
-of "There, but for the grace of God, goes me!" I decided that he should
-go through most of my own experiences, but that instead of fame and a
-thousand a year he should arrive ultimately at disillusion and a
-desolating suburban domesticity. I said I would call my novel "In the
-Shadow," a title suggested to me by the motto of Balzac's "Country
-Doctor"&mdash;"For a wounded heart, shadow and silence." It was to be all
-very dolorous, this Odyssey of a London clerk who&mdash;&mdash; But I must
-not disclose any detail of the plot.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-So I sat down, and wrote on a fair quarto sheet, "In the Shadow," and
-under that, "I." It was a religious rite, an august and imposing
-ceremonial; and I was the officiating priest. In the few fleeting
-instants between the tracing of the "I" and the tracing of the first
-word of the narrative, I felt happy and proud; but immediately the
-fundamental brain-work began, I lost nearly all my confidence. With
-every stroke the illusion grew thinner, more remote. I perceived that I
-could not become Flaubert by taking thought, and this rather obvious
-truth rushed over me as a surprise. I knew what I wanted to do, and I
-could not do it. I felt, but I could not express. My sentences would
-persist in being damnably Mudiesque. The <i>mots justes</i> hid themselves
-exasperatingly behind a cloud. The successions of dots looked merely
-fatuous. The charm, the poetry, the distinction, the inevitableness, the
-originality, the force, and the invaluable rhythmic contour&mdash;these
-were anywhere save on my page. All writers are familiar with the dreadful
-despair that ensues when a composition, on perusal, obstinately presents
-itself as a series of little systems of words joined by conjunctions and
-so forth, something like this&mdash;subject, predicate, object, <i>but</i>,
-subject, predicate, object. Pronoun, <i>however</i>, predicate, negative,
-infinitive verb. <i>Nevertheless</i>, participle, accusative, subject,
-predicate, etc., etc., etc., for evermore. I suffered that despair. The
-proper remedy is to go to the nearest bar and have a drink, or to read a
-bit of "Comus" or "Urn-Burial," but at that time I had no skill in
-weathering anti-cyclones, and I drove forward like a sinking steamer in
-a heavy sea.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And this was what it was, in serious earnest, to be an author! For I
-reckon that in writing the first chapter of my naturalistic novel, I
-formally became an author; I had undergone a certain apprenticeship. I
-didn't feel like an author, no more than I had felt like a journalist on
-a similar occasion. Indeed, far less: I felt like a fool, an incompetent
-ass. I seemed to have an idea that there was no such thing as
-literature, that literature was a mirage, or an effect of hypnotism, or
-a concerted fraud. After all, I thought, what in the name of common
-sense is the use of telling this silly ordinary story of everyday life?
-Where is the point? What <i>is</i> art, anyway, and all this chatter about
-truth to life, and all this rigmarole of canons?
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I finished the chapter that night, hurriedly, perfunctorily, and only
-because I had sworn to finish it. Then, in obedience to an instinct
-which all Grub Street has felt, I picked out the correct "Yellow Book"
-from a shelf and read my beautiful story again. That enheartened me a
-little, restored my faith in the existence of art, and suggested the
-comfortable belief that things were not perhaps as bad as they seemed.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Well, how's the novel getting on?" my friend the wall-paper enthusiast
-inquired jovially at supper.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Oh, fine!" I said. "It's going to be immense."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Why one should utter these frightful and senseless lies, I cannot guess.
-I might just as well have spoken the precise truth to him, for his was a
-soul designed by providence for the encouragement of others. Still,
-having made that remark, I added in my private ear that either the novel
-must be immense or I must perish in the attempt to make it so.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-In six months I had written only about thirty thousand words, and I felt
-the sort of elation that probably succeeds six months on a treadmill.
-But one evening, in the midst of a chapter, a sudden and mysterious
-satisfaction began to warm my inmost being. I knew that chapter was
-good and going to be good. I experienced happiness in the very act of
-work. Emotion and technique were reconciled. It was as if I had
-surprisingly come upon the chart with the blood-red cross showing where
-the Spanish treasure was buried. I dropped my pen, and went out for a
-walk, and decided to give the book an entirely fresh start. I carefully
-read through all that I had written. It was bad, but viewed in the mass
-it produced on me a sort of culminating effect which I had not
-anticipated. Conceive the poor Usual at the bottom of a flight of
-stairs, and the region of the Sublime at the top: it seemed to me that I
-had dragged the haggard thing halfway up, and that it lay there, inert
-but safe, awaiting my second effort. The next night I braced myself to
-this second effort, and I thought that I succeeded.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"We're doing the trick, Charlie," Edmund Kean whispered into the ear of
-his son during a poignant scene of "Brutus." And in the very crisis of
-my emotional chapters, while my hero was rushing fatally to the nether
-greyness of the suburbs and all the world was at its most sinister and
-most melancholy, I said to myself with glee: "We're doing the trick." My
-moods have always been a series of violent contrasts, and I was now just
-as uplifted as I had before been depressed. There were interludes of
-doubt and difficulty, but on the whole I was charmed with my novel. It
-would be a despicable affectation to disguise the fact that I deemed it
-a truly distinguished piece of literature, idiosyncratic, finely
-imaginative, and of rhythmic contour. As I approached the end, my
-self-esteem developed in a <i>crescendo</i>. I finished the tale, having
-sentenced my hero to a marriage infallibly disastrous, at three o'clock
-one morning. I had laboured for twelve hours without intermission. It
-was great, this spell; it was histrionic. It was Dumas over again, and
-the roaring French forties.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Nevertheless, to myself I did not yet dare to call myself an artist. I
-lacked the courage to believe that I had the sacred fire, the inborn and
-not-to-be-acquired vision. It seemed impossible that this should be so.
-I have ridiculed the whole artist tribe, and, in the pursuit of my
-vocation, I shall doubtless ridicule them again; but never seriously.
-Nothing is more deeply rooted in me than my reverence for the artistic
-faculty. And whenever I say, "The man's an artist," I say it with an
-instinctive solemnity that so far as I am concerned ends all discussion.
-Dared I utter this great saying to my shaving-mirror? No, I repeat that
-I dared not. More than a year elapsed before the little incident
-described at the commencement of these memoirs provided me with the
-audacity to inform the author of "In the Shadow" that he too belonged to
-the weird tribe of Benjamin.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-When my novel had been typewritten and I read it in cold blood, I was
-absolutely unable to decide whether it was very good, good, medium, bad,
-or very bad. I could not criticize it. All I knew was that certain
-sentences, in the vein of the <i>écriture artiste</i>, persisted
-beautifully in my mind, like fine lines from a favourite poet. I loosed
-the brave poor thing into the world over a post-office counter. "What
-chance <i>has</i> it, in the fray?" I exclaimed. My novel had become
-nothing but a parcel. Thus it went in search of its fate.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I have described the composition of my first book in detail as realistic
-as I can make it, partly because a few years ago the leading novelists
-of the day seemed to enter into a conspiracy to sentimentalize the
-first book episode in their brilliant careers.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="VIII">VIII</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-"Will you step this way?" said the publisher's manager, and after
-coasting by many shelves loaded with scores of copies of the same book
-laid flat in piles&mdash;to an author the most depressing sight in the
-world&mdash;I was ushered into the sanctum, the star-chamber, the den, the
-web of the spider.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I beheld the publisher, whose name is a household word wherever the
-English language is written for posterity. Even at that time his imprint
-flamed on the title-pages of one or two works of a deathless nature. My
-manuscript lay on an occasional table by his side, and I had the curious
-illusion that he was posing for his photograph with my manuscript. As I
-glanced at it I could not help thinking that its presence there bordered
-on the miraculous. I had parted with it at a post-office. It had been
-stamped, sorted, chucked into a van, whirled through the perilous
-traffic of London's centre, chucked out of a van, sorted again, and
-delivered with many other similar parcels at the publisher's. The
-publisher had said: "Send this to So-and-so to read." Then more perils
-by road and rail, more risks of extinction and disorientation. Then
-So-and-so, probably a curt man, with a palate cloyed by the sickliness
-of many manuscripts, and a short way with new authors, had read it or
-pretended to read it. Then finally the third ordeal of locomotion. And
-there it was, I saw it once more, safe!
-</p>
-
-<p>
-We discussed the weather and new reputations. I was nervous, and I think
-the publisher was nervous, too. At length, in a manner mysterious and
-inexplicable, the talk shifted to my manuscript. The publisher permitted
-himself a few compliments of the guarded sort.
-
-"But there's no money in it, you know," he said.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I suppose not," I assented. ("You are an ass for assenting to that," I
-said to myself.)
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I invariably lose money over new authors," he remarked, as if I was to
-blame.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"You didn't lose much over Mrs.&mdash;&mdash;," I replied, naming one of
-his notorious successes.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Oh, <i>well</i>!" he said, "of course&mdash;&mdash;. But I didn't make so
-much as you think, perhaps. Publishing is a very funny business." And then
-he added: "Do you think your novel will succeed like Mrs.&mdash;&mdash;'s?"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I said that I hoped it would.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I'll be perfectly frank with you," the publisher exclaimed, smiling
-beneficently. "My reader likes your book. I'll tell you what he says."
-He took a sheet of paper that lay on the top of the manuscript and read.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I was enchanted, spell-bound. The nameless literary adviser used phrases
-of which the following are specimens (I am recording with exactitude):
-"Written with great knowledge and a good deal of insight." "Character
-delineated by a succession of rare and subtle touches." "Living,
-convincing." "Vigour and accuracy." "The style is good."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I had no idea that publishers' readers were capable of such laudation.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The publisher read on: "I do not think it likely to be a striking
-success!"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Oh!" I murmured, shocked by this bluntness.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"There's no money in it," the publisher repeated, firmly. "First books
-are too risky. . . . I should like to publish it."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Well?" I said, and paused. I felt that he had withdrawn within himself
-in order to ponder upon the chances of this terrible risk. So as not to
-incommode him with my gaze, I examined the office, which resembled a
-small drawing-room rather than an office. I saw around me signed
-portraits of all the roaring lions on the sunny side of Grub Street.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I'll publish it," said the publisher, and I believe he made an honest
-attempt not to look like a philanthropist; however, the attempt failed.
-"I'll publish it. But of course I can only give you a small royalty."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"What royalty?" I asked.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Five per cent.&mdash;on a three-and-six-penny book."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Very well. Thank you!" I said.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I'll give you fifteen per cent, after the sale of five thousand
-copies," he added kindly.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-O ironist!
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I emerged from the web of the spider triumphant, an accepted author.
-Exactly ten days had elapsed since I had first parted with my
-manuscript. Once again life was plagiarizing fiction. I could not
-believe that this thing was true. I simply could not believe it. "Oh!" I
-reflected, incredulous, "Something's bound to happen. It can't really
-come off. The publisher might die, and then&mdash;&mdash;"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Protected by heaven on account of his good deeds, the publisher
-felicitously survived; and after a delay of twelve months (twelve
-centuries&mdash;during which I imagined that the universe hung motionless
-and expectant in the void!) he accomplished his destiny by really and
-truly publishing my book.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The impossible had occurred. I was no longer a mere journalist; I was an
-author.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"After all, it's nothing!" I said, with that intense and unoriginal
-humanity which distinguishes all of us. And in a blinding flash I saw
-that an author was in essence the same thing as a grocer or a duke.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="IX">IX</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-My novel, under a new title, was published both in England and America.
-I actually collected forty-one reviews, of it, and there must have been
-many that escaped me. Of these forty-one, four were unfavourable, eleven
-mingled praise and blame in about equal proportions, and twenty-six were
-unmistakably favourable, a few of them being enthusiastic.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Yet I had practically no friends on the press. One friend I had, a man
-of power, and he reviewed my book with an appreciation far too kind; but
-his article came as a complete surprise to me. Another friend I had,
-sub-editor of a society weekly, and he asked me for a copy of my book so
-that he might "look after it" in the paper. Here is part of the result:
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"He has all the young novelist's faults. . . . These are glaring faults;
-for, given lack of interest, and unpleasant scenes, how can a book be
-expected to be popular?"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-A third friend I had, who knew the chief fiction-reviewer on a great
-morning paper. He asked me for a special copy of my book, and quite on
-his own initiative, undertook to arrange the affair. Here is part of the
-result:
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"There is not much to be said either for or against&mdash;&mdash; by
-Mr.&mdash;&mdash;"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I had no other friends on the press, or friends who had friends on the
-press.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I might easily butcher the reviews for your amusement, but this practice
-is becoming trite. I will quote a single sentence which pleased me as
-much as any:&mdash;"What our hero's fate was let those who care to know
-find out, but let us assure them that in its discovery they will read of
-London life and labour as it is, not as the bulk of romances paint it."
-All the principal organs were surprisingly appreciative. And the
-majority of the reviewers agreed that my knowledge of human nature was
-exceptionally good, that my style was exceptionally good, that I had in
-me the makings of a novelist, and that my present subject was weak. My
-subject was not weak; but let that pass. When I reflect how my book
-flouted the accepted canons of English fiction, and how many aspects of
-it must have annoyed nine reviewers out of ten, I am compelled to the
-conclusion that reviewers are a very good-natured class of persons. I
-shall return to this interesting point later&mdash;after I have described
-how I became a reviewer myself. The fact to be asserted is that I, quite
-obscure and defenceless, was treated very well. I could afford to smile
-from a high latitude at the remark of "The New York&mdash;&mdash;" that
-"the story and characters are commonplace in the extreme." I felt that I
-had not lived in vain, and that kindred spirits were abroad in the land.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-My profits from this book with the exceptional style and the exceptional
-knowledge of human nature, exceeded the cost of having it typewritten by
-the sum of one sovereign. Nor was I, nor am I, disposed to grumble at
-this. Many a first book has cost its author a hundred pounds. I got a
-new hat out of mine.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-What I did grumble at was the dishonour of the prophet in his own
-county. Here I must delicately recall that my novel was naturalistic,
-and that it described the career of a young man alone in London. It had
-no "realism" in the vulgar sense, as several critics admitted, but still
-it was desperately exact in places, and I never surrounded the head of a
-spade with the aureole of a sentimental implement. The organ of a great
-seaport remarked: "We do not consider the book a healthy one. We say no
-more." Now you must imagine this excessively modern novel put before a
-set of estimable people whose ideas on fiction had been formed under the
-influence of Dickens and Mrs. Henry Wood, and who had never changed
-those ideas. Some of them, perhaps, had not read a novel for ten years
-before they read mine. The result was appalling, frightful, tragical.
-For months I hesitated to visit the town which had the foresight to bear
-me, and which is going to be famous on that score. I was castigated in
-the local paper. My nearest and dearest played nervously with their
-bread when my novel was mentioned at dinner. A relative in a distant
-continent troubled himself to inform me that the book was fragmentary
-and absolutely worthless. The broader-minded merely wished that I had
-never written the book. The discreet received it in silence. One
-innocent person, for whom I have the warmest regard, thought that my
-novel might be a suitable birthday present for his adolescent son. By
-chance he perused the book himself on the birthday eve. I was told that
-neither on that night nor on the next did he get a wink of sleep. His
-adolescent son certainly never got my book.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Most authors, I have learnt on enquiry, have to suffer from this strange
-lack of appreciation in the very circle where appreciation should be
-kindest; if one fault isn't found, another is; but they draw a veil
-across that dark aspect of the bright auctorial career. I, however, am
-trying to do without veils, and hence I refer to the matter.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="X">X</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-My chief resigned his position on the paper with intent to enliven other
-spheres of activity. The news of his resignation was a blow to me. It
-often happens that when an editor walks out of an office in the exercise
-of free-will, the staff follows him under compulsion. In Fleet Street
-there is no security of tenure unless one is ingenious enough to be the
-proprietor of one's paper.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I shall never get on with any one as I have got on with you," I said to
-the chief.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"You needn't," he answered. "I'm sure they'll have the sense to give you
-my place if you ask for it." "They" were a board of directors.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And they had the sense; they even had the sense not to wait until I
-asked. I have before remarked that the thumb of my Fate has always been
-turned up. Still on the glorious side of thirty, still young,
-enthusiastic, and a prey to delightful illusions, I suddenly found
-myself the editor of a London weekly paper. It was not a leading organ,
-but it was a London weekly paper, and it had pretensions; at least I
-had. My name was inscribed in various annuals of reference. I dined as
-an editor with other editors. I remember one day sitting down to table
-in a populous haunt of journalists with no less than four editors.
-"Three years ago," I said to myself, "I should have deemed this an
-impossible fairy tale." I know now that there are hundreds of persons in
-London and elsewhere who regard even editors with gentle and
-condescending toleration. One learns.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I needed a sub-editor, and my first act was to acquire one. I had the
-whole world of struggling lady-journalists to select from: to choose was
-an almost sublime function. For some months previously we had been
-receiving paragraphs and articles from an outside contributor whose
-<i>flair</i> in the discovery of subjects, whose direct simplicity of style
-and general tidiness of "copy," had always impressed me. I had never
-seen her, and I knew nothing about her; but I decided that, if she
-pleased, this lady should be my sub-editor. I wrote desiring her to
-call, and she called. Without much preface I offered her the situation;
-she accepted it.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Who recommended me to you?" she asked.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"No one," I replied, in the rôle of Joseph Pulitzer; "I liked your
-stuff."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-It was a romantic scene. I mention it because I derived a child-like
-enjoyment from that morning. Vanity was mixed up in it; but I
-argued&mdash;If you are an editor, be an editor imaginatively. I seemed
-to resemble Louis the Fifteenth beginning to reign after the death of
-the Regent, but with no troublesome Fleury in the background.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Now," I cried, "up goes the circulation!"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-But circulations are not to be bullied into ascension. They will only
-rise on the pinions of a carefully constructed policy. I thought I knew
-all about journalism for women, and I found that I knew scarcely the
-fringe of it. A man may be a sub-editor, or even an assistant-editor,
-for half a lifetime, and yet remain ignorant of the true significance of
-journalism. Those first months were months of experience in a very
-poignant sense. The proprietary desired certain modifications in the
-existing policy. O that mysterious "policy," which has to be created and
-built up out of articles, paragraphs, and pictures! That
-thrice-mysterious "public taste" which has to be aimed at in the dark
-and hit! I soon learnt the difference between legislature and executive.
-I could "execute" anything, from a eulogy of a philanthropic duchess to
-a Paris fashion letter. I could instruct a fashion-artist as though I
-knew what I was talking about. I could play Blucher at the Waterloo of
-the advertisement-manager. I could interview a beauty and make her say
-the things that a beauty must say in an interview. But to devise the
-contents of an issue, to plan them, to balance them; to sail with this
-wind and tack against that; to keep a sensitive cool finger on the
-faintly beating pulse of the terrible many-headed patron; to walk in a
-straight line through a forest black as midnight; to guess the riddle of
-the circulation-book week by week; to know by instinct why Smiths sent
-in a repeat-order, or why Simpkins' was ten quires less; to keep one eye
-on the majestic march of the world, and the other on the vagaries of a
-bazaar-reporter who has forgotten the law of libel: these things, and
-seventy-seven others, are the real journalism. It is these things that
-make editors sardonic, grey, unapproachable.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Unique among all suspenses is the suspense that occupies the editorial
-mind between the moment of finally going to press and the moment of
-examining the issue on the morning of publication. Errors, appalling and
-disastrous errors, will creep in; and they are irremediable then. These
-mishaps occur to the most exalted papers, to all papers, except perhaps
-the "Voce della Verità," which, being the organ of the Pope, is
-presumably infallible. Tales circulate in Fleet Street that make the
-hair stand on end; and every editor says: "This might have happened to
-<i>me</i>." Subtle beyond all subtleties is the magic and sinister change
-that happens to your issue in the machine-room at the printers.
-You pass the final page and all seems fair, attractive, clever,
-well-designed. . . . Ah! But what you see is not what is on the paper; it
-is the reflection of the bright image in your mind of what you intended!
-When the last thousand is printed and the parcels are in the vans, then you
-gaze at the unalterable thing, and you see it coldly as it actually is.
-You see not what you intended, but what you have accomplished. And the
-difference! It is like the chill, steely dawn after the vague poetry of
-a moonlit night.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-There is no peace for an editor. He may act the farce of taking a
-holiday, but the worm of apprehension is always gnawing at the root of
-pleasure. I once put my organ to bed and went off by a late train in a
-perfect delirium of joyous anticipation of my holiday. I was recalled by
-a telegram that a fire with a strong sense of ironic humour had burnt
-the printing office to the ground and destroyed five-sixths of my entire
-issue. In such crises something has to be done, and done quickly. You
-cannot say to your public next week: "Kindly excuse the absence of the
-last number, as there was a fire at the printers." Your public recks not
-of fires, no more than the General Post Office, in its attitude towards
-late clerks, recognizes the existence of fogs in winter. And herein
-lies, for the true journalist, one of the principal charms of Fleet
-Street. Herein lies the reason why an editor's life is at once
-insufferable and worth living. There are no excuses. Every one knows
-that if the crater of Highgate Hill were to burst and bury London in
-lava to-morrow, the newspapers would show no trace of the disaster
-except an account of it. That thought is fine, heroic, when an editor
-thinks of it.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And if an editor knows not peace, he knows power. In Fleet Street, as in
-other streets, the population divides itself into those who want
-something and those who have something to bestow; those who are anxious
-to give a lunch, and those who deign occasionally to accept a lunch;
-those who have an axe to grind and those who possess the grindstone. The
-change from the one position to the other was for me at first rather
-disconcerting; I could not understand it; there was an apparent
-unreality about it; I thought I must be mistaken; I said to myself:
-"Surely this unusual ingratiating affability has nothing to do with the
-accident that I am an editor." Then, like the rest of the owners of
-grindstones, I grew accustomed to the ownership, and cynical withal,
-cold, suspicious, and forbidding. I became bored by the excessive
-complaisance that had once tickled and flattered me. (Nevertheless,
-after I had ceased to be an editor I missed it; involuntarily I
-continued to expect it.) The situation of the editor of a ladies' paper
-is piquantly complicated, in this respect, by the fact that some women,
-not many&mdash;but a few, have an extraordinary belief in, and make
-unscrupulous use of, their feminine fascinations. The art of being "nice
-to editors" is diligently practised by these few; often, I know, with
-brilliant results. Sometimes I have sat in my office, with the charmer
-opposite, and sardonically reflected: "You think I am revolving round
-your little finger, madam, but you were never more mistaken in your
-life." And yet, breathes there the man with soul so uniformly cold that
-once or twice in such circumstances the woman was not right after all? I
-cannot tell. The whole subject, the subject of that strange, disturbing,
-distracting, emotional atmosphere of femininity which surrounds the male
-in command of a group of more or less talented women, is of a supreme
-delicacy. It could only be treated safely in a novel&mdash;one of the
-novels which it is my fixed intention never to write. This I know and
-affirm, that the average woman-journalist is the most loyal, earnest, and
-teachable person under the sun. I begin to feel sentimental when I think
-of her astounding earnestness, even in grasping the live coal of English
-syntax. Syntax, bane of writing-women, I have spent scores of
-ineffectual hours in trying to inoculate the ungrammatical sex against
-your terrors! And how seriously they frowned, and how seriously I
-talked; and all the while the eternal mystery of the origin and destiny
-of all life lay thick and unnoticed about us!
-</p>
-
-<p>
-These syntax-sittings led indirectly to a new development of my
-activities. One day a man called on me with a letter of introduction. He
-was a colonial of literary tastes. I asked in what manner I might serve
-him.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I want to know whether you would care to teach me journalism," he said.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Teach you journalism!" I echoed, wondering by what unperceived alchemy
-I myself, but yesterday a tyro, had been metamorphosed into a professor
-of the most comprehensive of all crafts.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I am told you are the best person to come to," he said.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Why not?" I thought. "Why shouldn't I?" I have never refused work when
-the pay has been good. I named a fee that might have frightened him, but
-it did not. And so it fell out that I taught journalism to him, and to
-others, for a year or two. This vocation suited me; I had an aptitude
-for it; and my fame spread abroad. Some of the greatest experts in
-London complimented me on my methods and my results. Other and more
-ambitious schemes, however, induced me to abandon this lucrative field,
-which was threatening to grow tiresome.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="XI">XI</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-I come now to a question only less delicate than that of the conflict of
-sexes in journalism&mdash;the question of reviewing, which, however, I
-shall treat with more freedom. If I have an aptitude for anything at all
-in letters, it is for criticism. Whenever I read a work of imagination, I
-am instantly filled with ideas concerning it; I form definite views
-about its merit or demerit, and having formed them, I hold those views
-with strong conviction. Denial of them rouses me; I must thump the table
-in support of them; I must compel people to believe that what I say is
-true; I cannot argue without getting serious in spite of myself. In
-literature, but in nothing else, I am a propagandist; I am not content
-to keep my opinion and let others keep theirs. To have a worthless book
-in my house (save in the way of business), to know that any friend of
-mine is enjoying it, actually distresses me. That book must go, the
-pretensions of that book must be exposed, if I am to enjoy peace of
-mind. Some may suspect that I am guilty here of the affectation of a
-pose. Really it is not so. I often say to myself, after the heat of an
-argument, a denunciation, or a defence: "What does it matter, fool? The
-great mundane movement will continue, the terrestrial ball will roll
-on." But will it? Something must matter, after all, or the mundane
-movement emphatically would not continue. And the triumph of a good
-book, and the ignominy of a bad book, matter to me.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The criticism of imaginative prose literature, which is my speciality,
-is an over-crowded and not very remunerative field of activity. Every
-intelligent mediocrity in Fleet Street thinks he can appraise a novel,
-and most of them, judging from the papers, seem to make the attempt. And
-so quite naturally the pay is as a rule contemptible. To enter this
-field, therefore, with the intention of tilling it to a profitable
-fiscal harvest is an enterprise in the nature of a forlorn hope. I
-undertook it in innocence and high spirits, from a profound instinct. I
-had something to say. Of late years I have come to the conclusion that
-the chief characteristic of all bad reviewing is the absence of genuine
-conviction, of a message, of a clear doctrine; the incompetent reviewer
-has to invent his opinions.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I succeeded at first by dint of ignoring one of the elementary laws of
-journalism, to-wit, that editors do not accept reviews from casual
-outsiders. I wrote a short review of a French work and sent it to "The
-Illustrated London News," always distinguished for its sound literary
-criticism. Any expert would have told me that I was wasting labour and
-postage. Nevertheless the review was accepted, printed, and handsomely
-paid for. I then sent a review of a new edition of Edward Carpenter's
-"Towards Democracy" to an evening paper, and this, too, achieved
-publicity. After that, for some months, I made no progress. And then I had
-the chance of a literary <i>causerie</i> in a weekly paper: eight hundred
-words a week, thirty pounds a year. I wrote a sample article&mdash;and I
-well remember the incredible pains I took to show that Mrs. Lynn Linton's
-"In Haste and at Leisure" was thoroughly bad&mdash;but my article was too
-"literary." The editor with thirty pounds a year to spend on literary
-criticism went in search of a confection less austere than mine. But I
-was not baulked for long. The literary column of my own paper (of which
-I was then only assistant-editor) was presented to me on my assurance
-that I could liven it up: seven hundred words a week, at twelve and
-sixpence. The stuff that I wrote was entirely unsuited to the taste of
-our public; but it attracted attention from the seats of the
-mighty, and it also attracted&mdash;final triumph of the despised
-reviewer!&mdash;publishers' advertisements. I wrote this column every week
-for some years. And I got another one to do, by asking for it.
-Then I selected some of my best and wittiest reviews, and
-sent them to the editor of a well-known organ of culture with
-a note suggesting that my pen ought to add to the charms of his
-paper. An editor of sagacity and perspicacity, he admitted the
-soundness of my suggestion without cavil, and the result was mutually
-satisfactory. At the present time.<a name="FNanchor_2_1" id="FNanchor_2_1"></a><a href="#Footnote_2_1" class="fnanchor">[2]</a> I am continually refusing critical
-work. I reckon that on an average I review a book and a fraction of a
-book every day of my life, Sundays included.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Then," says the man in the street inevitably, "you must spend a very
-large part of each day in reading new books." Not so. I fit my reviewing
-into the odd unoccupied corners of my time, the main portions of which
-are given to the manufacture of novels, plays, short stories, and longer
-literary essays. I am an author of several sorts. I have various strings
-to my bow. And I know my business. I write half a million words a year.
-That is not excessive; but it is passable industry, and nowadays I make
-a point of not working too hard. The half million words contain one or
-two books, one or two plays, and numerous trifles not connected with
-literary criticism; only about a hundred and fifty thousand words are
-left for reviewing.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The sense of justice of the man in the street is revolted. "You do not
-read through all the books that you pretend to criticize?" he hints. I
-have never known a reviewer to answer this insinuation straightforwardly
-in print, but I will answer it: No, I do not.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And the man in the street says, shocked: "You are unjust."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And I reply: "Not at all. I am merely an expert."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The performances of the expert in any craft will surprise and amaze the
-inexpert. Come with me into my study and I will surprise and amaze you.
-Have I been handling novels for bread-and-cheese all these years and not
-learnt to judge them by any process quicker than that employed by you
-who merely pick up a novel for relaxation after dinner? Assuming that
-your taste is fairly sound, let us be confronted with the same new
-novel, and I will show you, though you are a quick reader, that I can
-anticipate your judgment of that novel by a minimum of fifty-five
-minutes. The title-page&mdash;that conjunction of the title, the name of
-the author, and the name of the publisher&mdash;speaks to me, telling me
-all sorts of things. The very chapter-headings deliver a message of
-style. The narrative everywhere discloses to me the merits and defects
-of the writer; no author ever lived who could write a page without
-giving himself away. The whole book, open it where I will, is murmurous
-with indications for me. In the case of nine books of ten, to read them
-through would be not a work of supererogation&mdash;it would be a sinful
-waste of time on the part of a professional reviewer. The majority of
-novels&mdash;and all these remarks apply only to novels&mdash;hold no
-surprise for the professional reviewer. He can foretell them as the
-nautical almanac foretells astronomical phenomena. The customary
-established popular author seldom or never deviates from his appointed
-track, and it is the customary established popular author upon whom
-chiefly the reviewer is a parasite. New authors occasionally cause the
-reviewer to hesitate in his swift verdicts, especially when the verdict
-is inclined to be favourable. Certain publishers (that is to say, their
-"readers") have a knack of acquiring new authors who can imitate real
-excellence in an astonishing manner. In some cases the reviewer must
-needs deliberately "get into" the book, in order not to be deceived by
-appearances, in order to decide positively whether the author has
-genuine imaginative power, and if so, whether that power is capable of a
-sustained effort. But these difficult instances are rare. There remains
-the work of the true artist, the work that the reviewer himself admires
-and enjoys: say one book in fifty, or one in a hundred. The reviewer
-reads that through.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Brief reflection will convince any one that it would be economically
-impossible for the reviewer to fulfil this extraordinary behest of the
-man of the street to read every book through. Take your London morning
-paper, and observe the column devoted to fiction of the day. It
-comprises some fifteen hundred words, and the reviewer receives, if he
-is well paid, three guineas for it. Five novels are discussed. Those
-novels will amount to sixteen hundred pages of printed matter. Reading
-at the rate of eight words a second, the reviewer would accomplish two
-pages a minute, and sixteen hundred pages in thirteen hours and twenty
-minutes. Add an hour and forty minutes for the composition, and we have
-fifteen hours, or two days' work. Do you imagine that the reviewer of a
-London morning paper is going to hire out his immortal soul, his
-experience, his mere skill, at the rate of thirty-one and sixpence per
-day on irregular jobs? Scarcely. He will earn his three guineas inside
-three hours, and it will be well and truly earned. As a journeyman
-author, with the ability and inclination to turn my pen in any direction
-at request, I long ago established a rule never to work for less than
-ten shillings an hour on piecework. If an editor commissioned an
-article, he received from me as much fundamental brain-power and as much
-time as the article demanded&mdash;up to the limit of his pay in terms of
-hours at ten shillings apiece. But each year I raise my price per hour.
-Of course, when I am working on my own initiative, for the sole
-advancement of my artistic reputation, I ignore finance and think of
-glory alone. It cannot, however, be too dearly understood that the
-professional author, the man who depends entirely on his pen for the
-continuance of breath, and whose income is at the mercy of an illness or
-a headache, is eternally compromising between glory and something more
-edible and warmer at nights. He labours in the first place for food,
-shelter, tailors, a woman, European travel, horses, stalls at the opera,
-good cigars, ambrosial evenings in restaurants; and he gives glory the
-best chance he can. I am not speaking of geniuses with a mania for
-posterity; I am speaking of human beings.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-To return and to conclude this chapter. I feel convinced&mdash;nay, I
-know&mdash;that on the whole novelists get a little more than justice at
-the hands of their critics. I can recall many instances in which my praise
-has, in the light of further consideration, exceeded the deserts of a
-book; but very, very few in which I have cast a slur on genuine merit.
-Critics usually display a tendency towards a too generous kindness,
-particularly Scottish reviewers; it is almost a rule of the vocation.
-Most authors, I think, recognize this pleasing fact. It is only the
-minority, rabid for everlasting laudation, who carp; and, carping,
-demand the scalps of multiple-reviewers as a terrible example and
-warning to the smaller fry.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<div class="footnote">
-
-<p class="nind"><a name="Footnote_2_1" id="Footnote_2_1"></a><a href="#FNanchor_2_1"><span class="label">[2]</span></a>1900.</p></div>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="XII">XII</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-Serial fiction is sold and bought just like any other fancy goods. It
-has its wholesale houses, its commercial travellers&mdash;even its
-trusts and "corners." An editor may for some reason desire the work of a
-particular author; he may dangle gold before that author or that
-author's agent; but if a corner has been established he will be met by
-polite regrets and the information that Mr. So-and-So, or the
-Such-and-Such Syndicate, is the proper quarter to apply to; then the
-editor is aware that he will get what he wants solely by one method of
-payment&mdash;through the nose. A considerable part of the fiction
-business is in the hand of a few large syndicates&mdash;syndicates in
-name only, and middlemen in fact. They perform a useful function. They
-will sell to the editor the entire rights of a serial, or they will sell
-him the rights for a particular district&mdash;the London district, the
-Manchester district, the John-o'-Groats district&mdash;the price varying
-in direct ratio with the size of the district. Many London papers are
-content to buy the London rights only of a serial, or to buy the English
-rights as distinct from the Scottish rights, or to buy the entire rights
-minus the rights of one or two large provincial districts. Thus a serial
-may make its original appearance in London only; or it may appear
-simultaneously in London and Manchester only, or in London only in
-England and throughout Scotland, or in fifty places at once in England
-and Scotland. And after a serial has appeared for the first time and run
-its course, the weeklies of small and obscure towns, the proud organs of
-all the little Pedlingtons, buy for a trifle the right to reprint it.
-The serials of some authors survive in this manner for years in the
-remote provinces; pick up the local sheet in a country inn, and you may
-perhaps shudder again over the excitations of a serial that you read in
-book form in the far-off nineties. So, all editorial purses are suited,
-the syndicates reap much profit, and they are in a position to pay their
-authors, both tame and wild, a just emolument; upon occasion they can
-even be generous to the verge of an imprudence.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-When I was an editor, I found it convenient, economical, and
-satisfactory to buy all my fiction from a large and powerful syndicate.
-I got important "names," the names that one sees on the title-pages of
-railway novels, at a moderate price, and it was nothing to me that my
-serial was appearing also in Killicrankie, the Knockmilly-down
-Mountains, or the Scilly Isles. The representative of the syndicate, a
-man clothed with authority, called regularly; he displayed his dainty
-novelties, his leading lines, his old favourites, his rising stars, his
-dark horses, and his dead bargains; I turned them over, like a woman on
-remnant-day at a draper's; and after the inevitable Oriental chaffering,
-we came to terms. I bought Christmas stories in March, and seaside
-fiction in December, and good solid Baring-Gould or Le Queux or L.T.
-Meade all the year round.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Excellently as these ingenious narrative confections served their
-purpose, I dreamed of something better. And in my dream a sudden and
-beautiful thought accosted me: Why should all the buying be on one side?
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And the next time the representative of the syndicate called upon me, I
-met his overtures with another.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Why should all the buying be on one side?" I said. "You know I am an
-author." I added that if he had not seen any of my books, I must send
-him copies. They were exquisitely different from his wares, but I said
-nothing about that.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Ah!" he parried firmly. "We never buy serials from editors."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I perceived that I was by no means the first astute editor who had tried
-to mingle one sort of business with another. Still it was plain to me
-that my good friend was finding it a little difficult to combine the
-affability of a seller with the lofty disinclination of one who is
-requested to buy in a crowded market.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I should have thought," I remarked, with a diplomatic touch of
-annoyance, "that you would buy wherever you could get good stuff."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Oh, yes," he said, "of course we do. But&mdash;&mdash;"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Well," I continued, "I am writing a serial, and I can tell you it will
-be a good one. I merely mention it to you. If you don't care for it, I
-fancy I can discover some one who will."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Then, having caused to float between us, cloud-like, the significance of
-the indisputable fact that there were other syndicates in the world, I
-proceeded nonchalantly to the matter of his visit and gave him a good
-order. He was an able merchant, but I had not moved in legal circles for
-nothing. Business is business: and he as well as I knew that arbitrary
-rules to the exclusion of editors must give way before this great and
-sublime truth, the foundation of England's glory.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The next thing was to concoct the serial. I had entered into a compact
-with myself that I would never "write down" to the public in a long
-fiction. I was almost bound to pander to the vulgar taste, or at any
-rate to a taste not refined, in my editing, in my articles, and in my
-short stories, but I had sworn solemnly that I would keep the novel-form
-unsullied for the pure exercise of the artist in me. What became of this
-high compact? I merely ignored it. I tore it up and it was forgotten,
-the instant I saw a chance of earning the money of shame. I devised
-excuses, of course. I said that my drawing-room wanted new furniture; I
-said that I might lift the sensational serial to a higher place, thus
-serving the cause of art; I said&mdash;I don't know what I said, all to my
-conscience. But I began the serial.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-As an editor, I knew the qualities that a serial ought to possess. And I
-knew specially that what most serials lacked was a large, central,
-unifying, vivifying idea. I was very fortunate in lighting upon such an
-idea for my first serial. There are no original themes; probably no
-writer ever did invent an original theme; but my theme was a brilliant
-imposture of originality. It had, too, grandeur and passion, and
-fantasy, and it was inimical to none of the prejudices of the serial
-reader. In truth it was a theme worthy of much better treatment than I
-accorded to it. Throughout the composition of the tale, until nearly the
-end, I had the uneasy feeling, familiar to all writers, that I was
-frittering away a really good thing. But as the climax approached, the
-situa-took hold of me, and in spite of myself I wrote my best. The tale
-was divided into twelve instalments of five thousand words each, and I
-composed it in twenty-four half-days. Each morning, as I walked down the
-Thames Embankment, I contrived a chapter of two thousand five hundred
-words, and each afternoon I wrote the chapter. An instinctive sense of
-form helped me to plan the events into an imposing shape, and it needed
-no abnormal inventive faculty to provide a thrill for the conclusion of
-each section. Further, I was careful to begin the story on the first
-page, without preliminaries, and to finish it abruptly when it was
-finished. For the rest, I put in generous quantities of wealth, luxury,
-feminine beauty, surprise, catastrophe, and genial, incurable optimism.
-I was as satisfied with the result as I had been with the famous poem on
-Courage. I felt sure that the syndicate had never supplied me with a
-sensational serial half as good as mine, and I could conceive no plea
-upon which they would be justified in refusing mine.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-They bought it. We had a difference concerning the price. They offered
-sixty pounds; I thought I might as well as not try to get a hundred, but
-when I had lifted them up to seventy-five, the force of bluff would no
-further go, and the bargain was closed. I saw that by writing serials I
-could earn three guineas per half-day; I saw myself embarking upon a
-life of what Ebenezer Jones called "sensation and event"; I saw my
-prices increasing, even to three hundred pounds for a sixty thousand
-word yarn&mdash;my imagination stopped there.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The lingering remains of an artistic conscience prompted me to sign this
-eye-smiting work with a pseudonym. The syndicate, since my name was
-quite unknown in their world, made no objection, and I invented several
-aliases, none of which they liked. Then a friend presented me with a
-gorgeous pseudonym&mdash;"Sampson Death." Surely, I thought, the syndicate
-will appreciate the subtle power of that! But no! They averred that
-their readers would be depressed by Sampson Death at the head of every
-instalment.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Why not sign your own name?" they suggested.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And I signed my own name. I, apprentice of Flaubert et Cie., stood forth
-to the universe as a sensation-monger.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The syndicate stated that they would like to have the refusal of another
-serial from my pen.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-In correcting the proofs of the first one, I perceived all the
-opportunities I had missed in it, and I had visions of a sensational
-serial absolutely sublime in those qualities that should characterize a
-sensational serial. I knew all about Eugène Sue, and something about
-Wilkie Collins; but my ecstatic contemplation of an ideal serial soared
-far beyond these. I imagined a serial decked with the profuse ornament
-of an Eastern princess, a serial at once grandiose and witty, at once
-modern and transcendental, a serial of which the interest should
-gradually close on the reader like a vice until it became intolerable. I
-saw the whole of London preoccupied with this serial instead of with
-cricket and politics. I heard the dandiacal City youths discussing in
-first-class compartments on the Underground what would happen next in
-it. I witnessed a riot in Fleet Street because I had, accidentally on
-purpose, delayed my copy for twenty-four hours, and the editor of the
-"Daily&mdash;&mdash;" had been compelled to come out with an apology.
-Lastly, I heard the sigh of relief exhaled to heaven by a whole people,
-when in the final instalment I solved the mystery, untied the knot,
-relieved the cruel suspense.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Suck was my dream&mdash;a dream that I never realized, but which I believe
-to be capable of realization. It is decades since even a second-class
-imaginative genius devoted itself entirely to the cult of the literary
-<i>frisson</i>. Sue excited a nation by admirable sensationalism. The feat
-might be accomplished again, and in this era so prolific in Napoleons of
-the press, it seems strange that no Napoleon has been able to organize
-the sensational serial on a Napoleonic scale.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I did not realize my dream, but I was inspired by it. Once more I
-received from the gods a plot scintillating with possibilities. It was
-less fine than the previous one; it was of the earth earthly; but it
-began with a scene quite unique in the annals of syndicates, and by this
-time I knew a little better how to keep the fire burning. I lavished wit
-and style on the thing, and there is no material splendour of modern
-life that I left out. I plunged into it with all my energy and
-enthusiasm, and wrote the fifteen instalments in fifteen days; I tried
-to feel as much like Dumas <i>père</i> as I could. But when I had done I
-felt, physically, rather more like the fragile Shelley or some wan
-curate than Dumas. I was a wreck.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The syndicate were willing to buy this serial, but they offered me no
-increase of rates. I declined to accept the old terms, and then the
-syndicate invited me to lunch. I made one of the greatest financial
-mistakes of my life on that accurst day, and my only excuse is that I
-was unaccustomed to being invited out to lunch by syndicates. I ought to
-have known, with all my boasted knowledge of the world of business, that
-syndicates do not invite almost unknown authors to lunch without
-excellent reason. I had refused the syndicate's offer, and the syndicate
-asked me to name a price for the entire rights of my tale. I named a
-price; it was a good price for me, then; but the words were scarcely out
-of my mouth before I saw that I had blundered. Too late! My terms were
-quietly accepted. Let me cast no slightest aspersion upon the methods of
-the syndicate: the bargain was completed before lunch had commenced.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The syndicate disposed of the whole first serial rights of my tale to a
-well-known London weekly. The proprietors of the paper engaged a
-first-class artist to illustrate it, they issued a special circular
-about it, they advertised it every week on 800 railway stations. The
-editor of the paper wrote me an extremely appreciative letter as to the
-effect of the serial from his point of view. The syndicate informed a
-friend of mine that it was the best serial they had ever had. After
-running in London it overran the provincial press like a locust-swarm.
-It was, in a word, a boom. It came out in volume form, and immediately
-went into a second edition; it still sells. It was the first of my books
-that "The Times" ever condescended to review; the "Spectator" took it
-seriously in a column and a quarter; and my friends took it seriously. I
-even received cables from foreign lands with offers to buy translation
-rights. I became known as the author of that serial. And all this, save
-for an insignificant trifle, to the profit of an exceedingly astute
-syndicate!
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Subsequently I wrote other serials, but never again with the same verve.
-I found an outlet for my energies more amusing and more remunerative
-than the concoction of serials; and I am a serialist no longer.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="XIII">XIII</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-While yet an assistant-editor, I became a dramatic critic through the
-unwillingness of my chief to attend a theatrical matinée performance
-given, by some forlorn little society, now defunct, for the rejuvenation
-of the English drama. My notice of the performance amused him, and soon
-afterwards he suggested that I should do our dramatic column in his
-stead. Behold me a "first-nighter"! When, with my best possible air of
-nonchalance and custom, I sauntered into my stall on a Lyceum first
-night, I glanced at the first rows of the pit with cold and aloof
-disdain. "Don't you wish you were me?" I thought behind that
-supercilious mask. "You have stood for hours imprisoned between parallel
-iron railings. Many times I have stood with you. But never again,
-miserable pittites!" Nevertheless I was by no means comfortable in my
-stall. Around me were dozens of famous or notorious faces, the leading
-representatives of all that is glittering and factitious in the city of
-wealth, pleasure, and smartness. And everybody seemed to know everybody
-else. I alone seemed to be left out in the cold. My exasperated
-self-conscious fancy perceived in every haughty stare the enquiry: "Who
-is this whipper-snapper in the dress-suit that obviously cost four
-guineas in Cheapside?" I knew not a soul in that brilliant resort.
-During the intervals I went into the foyer and listened to the phrases
-which the critics tossed to each other over their liqueur-glasses. Never
-was such a genial confusion of "Old Chap," "Old Man," "Old Boy," "Dear
-Old Pal"! "Are they all blood-brothers?" I asked myself. The banality,
-the perfect lack of any sort of aesthetic culture, which characterized
-their remarks on the piece, astounded me. I said arrogantly: "If I don't
-know more about the art of the theatre than the whole crowd of you put
-together, I will go out and hang myself." Yet I was unspeakably proud to
-be among them. In a corner I caught sight of a renowned novelist whose
-work I respected. None noticed him, and he looked rather sorry for
-himself. "You and I . . .!" I thought. I had not attended many first
-nights before I discovered that the handful of theatrical critics whose
-articles it is possible to read without fatigue, made a point of never
-leaving their stalls. They were nobody's old chap, and nobody's old pal.
-I copied their behaviour.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-First on my own paper, and subsequently on two others, I practised
-dramatic criticism for five or six years. Although I threw it up in the
-end mainly from sheer lassitude, I enjoyed the work. It means late
-nights, and late nights are perdition; but there is a meretricious
-glamour about it that attracts the foolish moth in me, and this I am
-bound to admit. My trifling influence over the public was decidedly on
-the side of the angels. I gradually found that I possessed a coherent
-theory of the drama, definite critical standards, and all the rest of
-the apparatus; in short, that I had something to say. And my verdicts
-had a satisfactory habit of coinciding with those of the two foremost
-theatrical critics in London&mdash;perhaps in Europe (I need not name
-them). It is a somewhat strange fact that I made scarcely any friends in
-the theatre. After all those years of assiduous first-nighting, I was
-almost as solitary in the auditorium on the evening when I bade a
-<i>blase</i> adieu to the critical bench as when I originally entered
-it. I fancied I had wasted my time and impaired my constitution in
-emulating the achievements of Théophile Gautier, Hazlitt, Francisque
-Sarcey and M. Jules Lemaître, to say nothing of Dutton Cook and Mr.
-Clement Scott. My health may have suffered; but, as it happened, I had
-not quite wasted my time.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Why don't you write a play yourself?"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-This blunt question was put to me by a friend, an amateur actor, whom I
-had asked to get up some little piece or other for an entertainment in
-the Theatre Royal back-drawing-room of my house.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Quite out of my line," I replied, and I was absolutely sincere. I had
-no notion whatever of writing for the stage. I felt sure that I had not
-the aptitude.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Nonsense!" he Exclaimed. "It's as easy as falling off a log."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-We argued, and I was on the point of refusing the suggestion, when the
-spirit of wild adventure overcame me, and I gravely promised my friend
-that I would compose a duologue if he and his wife would promise to
-perform it at my party. The affair was arranged. I went to bed with the
-conviction that in the near future I stood a fair chance of looking an
-ass. However, I met with what I thought to be an amusing idea for a
-curtain-raiser the next morning, and in the afternoon I wrote the piece
-complete. I enjoyed writing it, and as I read it aloud to myself I
-laughed at it. I discovered that I had violated the great canon of
-dramatic art,&mdash;Never keep your audience in the dark, and this troubled
-me (Paul Hervieu had not then demonstrated by his "L'Enigme" that
-canon may be broken with impunity); but I could not be at the trouble of
-reconstructing the whole play for the sake of an Aristotelian maxim. I
-at once posted the original draft to my friend with this note:
-"Dear &mdash;&mdash;, Here is the play which last night I undertook to
-write for you."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The piece was admirably rendered to an audience of some thirty immortal
-souls&mdash;of course very sympathetic immortal souls. My feelings, as the
-situation which I had invented gradually developed into something alive
-on that tiny make-shift stage, were peculiar and, in a way, alarming.
-Every one who has driven a motor-car knows the uncanny sensation that
-ensues when for the first time in your life you pull the starting lever,
-and the Thing beneath you begins mysteriously and formidably to move. It
-is at once an astonishment, a terror, and a delight. I felt like that as
-I watched the progress of my first play. It was as though I had
-unwittingly liberated an energy greater than I knew, actually created
-something vital. This illusion of physical vitality is the exclusive
-possession of the dramatist; the novelist, the poet, cannot share it.
-The play was a delicious success. People laughed so much that some of my
-most subtle jocosities were drowned in the appreciative cachinnation.
-The final applause was memorable, at any rate to me. No mere good-nature
-can simulate the unique ring of genuine applause, and this applause was
-genuine. It was a microscopic triumph for me, but it was a triumph.
-Every one said to me: "But you are a dramatist!" "Oh, no!" I replied
-awkwardly; "this trifle is really nothing." But the still small voice of
-my vigorous self-confidence said: "Yes, you are, and you ought to have
-found it out years ago!" Among my audience was a publisher. He invited
-me to write for him a little book of one-act farces for amateurs; his
-terms were agreeable. I wrote three such farces, giving two days to
-each, and the volume was duly published; no book of mine has cost me
-less trouble. The reviews of it were lavish in praise of my "unfailing
-wit"; the circulation was mediocre. I was asked by companies of amateur
-actors up and down the country to assist at rehearsals of these pieces;
-but I could never find the energy to comply, save once. I hankered after
-the professional stage. By this time I could see that I was bound to
-enter seriously into the manufacture of stage-plays. My readers will
-have observed that once again in my history the inducement to embark for
-a fresh port had been quite external and adventitious.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I had a young friend with an extraordinary turn for brilliant epigram
-and an equally extraordinary gift for the devising of massive themes. He
-showed me one day the manuscript of a play. My faith in my instinct for
-form, whether in drama or fiction, was complete, and I saw instantly
-that what this piece lacked was form, which means intelligibility. It
-had everything except intelligibility. "Look here!" I said to him, "we
-will write a play together, you and I. We can do something that will
-knock spots off&mdash;&mdash;" etc., etc. We determined upon a grand
-drawing-room melodrama which should unite style with those qualities
-that make for financial success on the British stage. In a few days my
-friend produced a list of about a dozen "ideas" for the piece. I chose
-the two largest and amalgamated them. In the confection of the plot, and
-also throughout the entire process of manufacture, my experience as a
-dramatic critic proved valuable. I believe my friend had only seen two
-plays in his life. We accomplished our first act in a month or so, and
-when this was done and the scenario of the other three written out, we
-informed each other that the stuff was exceedingly good.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Part of my share in the play was to sell it. I knew but one man of any
-importance in the theatrical world; he gave me an introduction to the
-manager of a West End theatre second to none in prestige and wealth. The
-introduction had weight; the manager intimated by letter that his sole
-object in life was to serve me, and in the meantime he suggested an
-appointment. I called one night with our first act and the scenario, and
-amid the luxuriousness of the managerial room, the aroma of coffee, the
-odour of Turkish cigarettes, I explained to that manager the true
-greatness of our play. I have never been treated with a more distinguished
-politeness; I might have been Victorien Sardou, or Ibsen . . . (no,
-not Ibsen). In quite a few days the manager telephoned to my
-office and asked me to call the same evening. He had read the
-manuscript; he thought very highly of it, very highly.
-"But&mdash;&mdash;" Woe! Desolation! Dissipation of airy castles! It was
-preposterous on our part to expect that our first play should be
-commissioned by a leading theatre. But indeed we had expected this
-miracle. The fatal "But" arose from a difficulty of casting the
-principal part; so the manager told me. He was again remarkably
-courteous, and he assuaged the rigour of his refusal by informing me
-that he was really in need of a curtain-raiser with a part for a certain
-actress of his company; he fancied that we could supply him with the
-desired <i>bibelot</i>; but he wanted it at once, within a week. Within
-a week my partner and I had each written a one-act play, and in less
-than a fortnight I received a third invitation to discuss coffee,
-Turkish cigarettes, and plays. The manager began to talk about the play
-which was under my own signature.
-
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Now, what is your idea of terms?" he said, walking to and fro.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"Can it be true," I thought, "that I have actually sold a play to this
-famous manager?" In a moment my simple old ambitions burst like a Roman
-candle into innumerable bright stars. I had been content hitherto with
-the prospect of some fame, a thousand a year, and a few modest luxuries.
-But I knew what the earnings of successful dramatists were. My thousand
-increased tenfold; my mind dwelt on all the complex sybaritism of
-European capitals; and I saw how I could make use of the unequalled
-advertisement of theatrical renown to find a ready market for the most
-artistic fiction that I was capable of writing. This new scheme of
-things sprang into my brain instantaneously, full-grown.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I left the theatre an accepted dramatist.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-It never rains but it pours. My kind manager mentioned our stylistic
-drawing-room melodrama to another manager with such laudation that the
-second manager was eager to see it. Having seen it, he was eager to buy
-it. He gave us a hundred down to finish it in three months, and when we
-had finished it he sealed a contract for production with another cheque
-for a hundred. At the same period, through the mediation of the friend
-who had first introduced me to this world where hundreds were thrown
-about like fivers, I was commissioned by the most powerful theatrical
-manager on earth to assist in the dramatization of a successful novel;
-and this led to another commission of a similar nature, on more
-remunerative terms. Then a certain management telegraphed for me (in the
-theatre all business is done by telegraph and cable), and offered me a
-commission to compress a five-act Old English comedy into three acts.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"We might have offered this to So-and-So or So-and-So," they said,
-designating persons of importance. "But we preferred to come to you."
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"I assume my name is to appear?" I said.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-But my name was not to appear, and I begged to be allowed to decline the
-work.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I suddenly found myself on terms of familiarity with some of the great
-ones of the stage. I found myself invited into the Garrick Club, and
-into the more Bohemian atmosphere of the Green Room Club. I became
-accustomed to hearing the phrase: "You are the dramatist of the future."
-One afternoon I was walking down Bedford Street when a hand was placed
-on my shoulder, and a voice noted for its rich and beautiful quality
-exclaimed: "How the d&mdash;&mdash;l are you, my dear chap?" The speaker
-bears a name famous throughout the English-speaking world.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"You are arriving!" I said to myself, naïvely proud of this greeting. I
-had always understood that the theatrical "ring" was impenetrable to an
-outsider; and yet I had stepped into the very middle of it without the
-least trouble.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-My collaborator and I then wrote a farce. "We can't expect to sell
-everything," I said to him warningly, but I sold it quite easily. Indeed
-I sold it, repurchased it, and sold it again, within the space of three
-months.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Reasons of discretion prevent me from carrying my theatrical record
-beyond this point.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I have not spoken of the artistic side of this play-concoction, because
-it scarcely has any. My aim in writing plays, whether alone or in
-collaboration, has always been strictly commercial.<a name="FNanchor_3_1" id="FNanchor_3_1"></a><a href="#Footnote_3_1" class="fnanchor">[3]</a> I wanted money in
-heaps, and I wanted advertisement for my books. Here and there, in the
-comedies and farces in which I have been concerned, a little genuine
-dramatic art has, I fancy, been introduced; but surreptitiously, and
-quite unknown to the managers. I have never boasted of it in managerial
-apartments. That I have amused myself while constructing these
-arabesques of intrigue and epigram is indubitable, whether to my credit
-or discredit as a serious person. I laugh constantly in writing a farce.
-I have found it far easier to compose a commercial play than an artistic
-novel. How our princes of the dramatic kingdom can contrive to spend two
-years over a single piece, as they say they do, I cannot imagine. The
-average play contains from eighteen to twenty thousand words; the
-average novel contains eighty thousand; after all, writing is a question
-of words. At the rate of a thousand words a day, one could write a play
-three times over in a couple of months; prefix a month&mdash;thirty solid
-days of old Time!&mdash;for the perfecting of the plot, and you will be
-able to calculate the number of plays producible by an expert craftsman in
-a year. And unsuccessful plays are decidedly more remunerative than many
-successful novels. I am quite certain that the vast majority of failures
-produced in the West End mean to their authors a minimum remuneration of
-ten pounds per thousand words. In the fiction-mart ten pounds per
-thousand is gilded opulence. I am neither Sardou, Sudermann, nor George
-R. Sims, but I know what I am talking about, and I say that dramatic
-composition for the market is child's play compared to the writing of
-decent average fiction&mdash;provided one has an instinct for stage
-effect.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<div class="footnote">
-
-<p class="nind"><a name="Footnote_3_1" id="Footnote_3_1"></a><a href="#FNanchor_3_1"><span class="label">[3]</span></a>Once more written in 1900.</p></div>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="XIV">XIV</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-It cuts me to the heart to compare English with American publishers to
-the disadvantage, however slight, of the former; but the exigencies of a
-truthful narrative demand from me this sacrifice of personal feeling to
-the god in "the sleeping-car emblematic of British enterprise." The
-representative of a great American firm came over to England on a
-mission to cultivate personal relations with authors of repute and
-profitableness. Among other documents of a similar nature, he had an
-introduction to myself; I was not an author of repute and
-profitableness, but I was decidedly in the movement and a useful sort of
-person to know. We met and became friends, this ambassador and I; he
-liked my work, a sure avenue to my esteem; I liked his genial
-shrewdness. Shortly afterwards, there appeared in a certain paper an
-unsigned article dealing, in a broad survey alleged to be masterly, with
-the evolution of the literary market during the last thirty years. My
-American publisher read the article&mdash;he read everything&mdash;and,
-immediately deciding in his own mind that I was the author of it, he
-wrote me an enthusiastic letter of appreciation. He had not been
-deceived; I was the author of the article. Within the next few days it
-happened that he encountered an English publisher who complained that he
-could not find a satisfactory "reader." He informed the English
-publisher of my existence, referred eulogistically to my article, and
-gave his opinion that I was precisely the man whom the English publisher
-needed. The English publisher had never heard of me (I do not blame him,
-I merely record), but he was so moved by the American's oration that he
-invited me to lunch at his club. I lunched at his club, in a discreet
-street off Piccadilly (an aged and a sound wine!), and after lunch, my
-host drew me out to talk at large on the subject of authors, publishers,
-and cash, and the interplay of these three. I talked. I talked for a
-very long while, enjoying it. The experience was a new one for me. The
-publisher did not agree with all that I said, but he agreed with a good
-deal of it, and at the close of the somewhat exhausting assize, in which
-between us we had judged the value of nearly every literary reputation
-in England, he offered me the post of principal reader to his firm, and
-I accepted it.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-It is, I believe, an historical fact that authors seldom attend the
-funeral of a publisher's reader. They approve the sepulture, but do not,
-save sometimes in a spirit of ferocious humour, lend to the procession
-the dignity of their massive figures. Nevertheless, the publisher's
-reader is the most benevolent person on earth. He is so perforce. He may
-begin his labours in the slaughterous vein of the "Saturday Review"; but
-time and the extraordinary level mediocrity of manuscripts soon cure him
-of any such tendency. He comes to refuse but remains to accept. He must
-accept something&mdash;or where is the justification of his existence?
-Often, after a prolonged run of bad manuscripts, I have said to myself:
-"If I don't get a chance to recommend something soon I shall be asked to
-resign." I long to look on a manuscript and say that it is good, or that
-there are golden sovereigns between the lines. Instead of searching for
-faults I search for hidden excellences. No author ever had a more
-lenient audience than I. If the author would only believe it, I want, I
-actually desire, to be favourably impressed by his work. When I open the
-parcel of typescript I beam on it with kindly eyes, and I think:
-"Perhaps there is something really good here"; and in that state of mind
-I commence the perusal. But there never is anything really good there.
-In an experience not vast, but extending over some years, only one book
-with even a touch of genius has passed through my hands; that book was
-so faulty and so wilfully wild, that I could not unreservedly advise its
-publication and my firm declined it; I do not think that the book has
-been issued elsewhere. I have "discovered" only two authors of talent;
-one of these is very slowly achieving a reputation; of the other I have
-heard nothing since his first book, which resulted in a financial loss.
-Time and increasing knowledge of the two facts have dissipated for me
-the melancholy and affecting legend of literary talent going a-begging
-because of the indifference of publishers. O young author of talent,
-would that I could find you and make you understand how the publisher
-yearns for you as the lover for his love! <i>Qua</i> publisher's reader, I
-am a sad man, a man confirmed in disappointment, a man in whom the
-phenomenon of continued hope is almost irrational. When I look back
-along the frightful vista of dull manuscripts that I have refused or
-accepted, I tremble for the future of English literature (or should
-tremble, did I not infallibly know that the future of English literature
-is perfectly safe after all)! And yet I have by no means drunk the worst
-of the cup of mediocrity. The watery milk of the manuscripts sent to my
-employer has always been skimmed for me by others; I have had only the
-cream to savour. I am asked sometimes why publishers publish so many bad
-books; and my reply is: "Because they can't get better." And this is a
-profound truth solemnly enunciated.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-People have said to me: "<i>But you are so critical; you condemn
-everything</i>." Such is the complaint of the laity against the
-initiate, against the person who has diligently practised the
-cultivation of his taste. And, roughly speaking, it is a well-founded
-and excusable complaint. The person of fine taste does condemn nearly
-everything. He takes his pleasure in a number of books so limited as to
-be almost nothing in comparison with the total mass of production. Out
-of two thousand novels issued in a year, he may really enjoy
-half-a-dozen at the outside. And the one thousand nine hundred and
-ninety-four he lumps together in a wholesale contempt which draws no
-distinctions. This is right. This contributes to the preservation of a
-high standard. But the laity will never be persuaded that it is just.
-The point I wish to make, however, is that when I sit down to read for
-my publisher I first of all forget my literary exclusiveness. I sink the
-aesthetic aristocrat and become a plain man. By a deliberate act of
-imagination, I put myself in the place, not of the typical average
-reader&mdash;for there is no such person&mdash;but of a composite of the
-various <i>genera</i> of average reader known to publishing science. I
-<i>am</i> that composite for the time; and, being so, I remain quiescent
-and allow f the book to produce its own effect on me. I employ no
-canons, rules, measures. Does the book bore me&mdash;that condemns it.
-Does it interest me, ever so slightly&mdash;that is enough to entitle it
-to further consideration. When I have decided that it interests the
-imaginary composite whom I represent, then I become myself again, and
-proceed scientifically to enquire why it has interested, and why it has
-not interested more intensely; I proceed to catalogue its good and bad
-qualities, to calculate its chances, to assay its monetary worth.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-The first gift of a publisher's reader should be imagination; without
-imagination, the power to put himself in a position in which actually he
-is not, fine taste is useless&mdash;indeed, it is worse than useless. The
-ideal publisher's reader should have two perfections&mdash;perfect taste
-and perfect knowledge of what the various kinds of other people deem to be
-taste. Such qualifications, even in a form far from perfect, are rare. A
-man is born with them; though they may be cultivated, they cannot either
-of them be acquired. The remuneration of the publisher's reader ought,
-therefore, to be high, lavish, princely. It it not. It has nothing
-approaching these characteristics. Instead of being regarded as the
-ultimate seat of directing energy, the brain within the publisher's
-brain, the reader often exists as a sort of offshoot, an accident, an
-external mechanism which must be employed because it is the custom to
-employ it. As one reflects upon the experience and judgment which
-readers must possess, the responsibility which weighs on them, and the
-brooding hypochondriasis engendered by their mysterious calling, one
-wonders that their salaries do not enable them to reside in Park Lane or
-Carlton House Terrace. The truth is, that they exist precariously in
-Walham Green, Camberwell, or out in the country where rents are low.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I have had no piquant adventures as a publisher's reader. The vocation
-fails in piquancy: that is precisely where it does fail. Occasionally
-when a manuscript comes from some established author who has been deemed
-the private property of another house, there is the excitement of
-discovering from the internal evidence of the manuscript, or from the
-circumstantial evidence of public facts carefully collated, just why
-that manuscript has been offered to my employer; and the discovered
-reason is always either amusing or shameful. But such excitements are
-rare, and not very thrilling after all. No! Reading for a publisher does
-not foster the joy of life. I have never done it with enthusiasm; and,
-frankly, I continue to do it more from habit than from inclination. One
-learns too much in the rôle. The gilt is off the gingerbread, and the
-bloom is off the rye, for a publisher's reader. The statistics of
-circulations are before him; and no one who is aware of the actual
-figures which literary advertisements are notoriously designed to
-conceal can be called happy until he is dead.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="XV">XV</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-When I had been in London a decade, I stood aside from myself and
-reviewed my situation with the god-like and detached impartiality of a
-trained artistic observer. And what I saw was a young man who
-pre-eminently knew his way about, and who was apt to be rather too
-complacent over this fact; a young man with some brilliance but far more
-shrewdness; a young man with a highly developed faculty for making a
-little go a long way; a young man who was accustomed to be listened to
-when he thought fit to speak, and who was decidedly more inclined to
-settle questions than to raise them.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-This young man had invaded the town as a clerk at twenty-five shillings
-a week, paying six shillings a week for a bed-sitting room, threepence
-for his breakfast, and sixpence for his vegetarian dinner. The curtain
-falls on the prologue. Ten years elapse. The curtain rises on the figure
-of an editor, novelist, dramatist, critic, connoisseur of all arts. See
-him in his suburban residence, with its poplar-shaded garden, its
-bicycle-house at the extremity thereof, and its horizon composed of the
-District Railway Line. See the study, lined with two thousand books,
-garnished with photogravures, and furnished with a writing-bureau and a
-chair and nothing else. See the drawing-room with its artistic
-wall-paper, its Kelmscotts, its water-colours of a pallid but
-indubitable distinction, its grand piano on which are a Wagnerian score
-and Bach's Two-part Inventions. See the bachelor's bedroom, so austere
-and precise, wherein Boswell's "Johnson" and Baudelaire's "Fleurs du
-Mal" exist peaceably together on the night-table. The entire machine
-speaks with one voice, and it tells you that there are no flies on that
-young man, that young man never gives the wrong change. He is in
-the movement, he is correct; but at the same time he is not so simple as
-not to smile with contemptuous toleration at all movements and all
-correctness. He knows. He is a complete guide to art and life. His
-innocent foible is never to be at a loss, and never to be carried
-away&mdash;save now and then, because an occasional ecstasy is good for the
-soul. His knowledge of the <i>coulisses</i> of the various arts is
-wonderful. He numbers painters, sculptors, musicians, architects, among his
-intimate friends; and no artistic manifestation can possibly occur that
-he is unable within twenty-four hours to assess at its true value. He is
-terrible against <i>cabotins</i>, no matter where he finds them, and this
-seems to be his hobby: to expose <i>cabotins</i>.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-He is a young man of method; young men do not arrive without method at
-the condition of being encyclopædias; his watch is as correct as his
-judgments. He breakfasts at eight sharp, and his housekeeper sets the
-kitchen clock five minutes fast, for he is a terrible Ivan at breakfast.
-He glances at a couple of newspapers, first at the list of "publications
-received," and then at the news. Of course he is not hoodwinked by
-newspapers. He will meet the foreign editor of the "Daily
-&mdash;&mdash;" at lunch and will learn the true inwardness of that
-exploded canard from Berlin. Having assessed the newspapers, he may
-interpret to his own satisfaction a movement from a Mozart piano sonata,
-and then he will brush his hat, pick up sundry books, and pass sedately
-to the station. The station-master is respectfully cordial, and quite
-ready to explain to him the secret causation of delays, for his
-season-ticket is a white one. He gets into a compartment with a
-stockbroker, a lawyer, or a tea-merchant, and immediately falls to work;
-he does his minor reviewing in the train, fostering or annihilating
-reputations while the antique engine burrows beneath the squares of the
-West End; but his brain is not so fully occupied that he cannot spare a
-corner of it to meditate upon the extraordinary ignorance and simplicity
-of stockbrokers, lawyers, and tea-merchants. He reaches his office, and
-for two or three hours practises that occupation of watching other
-people work which is called editing: a process always of ordering, of
-rectifying, of laying down the law, of being looked up to, of showing
-how a thing ought to be done and can be done, of being flattered and
-cajoled, of dispensing joy or gloom&mdash;in short, the Jupiter and Shah
-of Persia business. He then departs, as to church, to his grill-room,
-where for a few moments himself and the cook hold an anxious
-consultation to decide which particular chop or which particular steak
-out of a mass of chops and steaks shall have the honour of sustaining
-him till tea-time. The place is full of literary shahs and those about
-to be shahs. They are all in the movement; they constitute the movement.
-They ride the comic-opera whirlwinds of public opinion and direct the
-tea-cup storms of popularity. The young man classes most of them with
-the stockbroker, the lawyer, and the tea-merchant. With a few he
-fraternises, and these few save their faces by appreciating the humour
-of the thing. Soon afterwards he goes home, digging <i>en route</i> the
-graves of more reputations, and, surrounded by the two thousand volumes,
-he works in seclusion at his various activities that he may triumph
-openly. He descends to dinner stating that he has written so many
-thousand words, and excellent words too&mdash;stylistic, dramatic,
-tender, witty. There may be a theatrical first-night toward, in which
-case he returns to town and sits in the seat of the languid for a space.
-Or he stays within doors and discusses with excessively sophisticated
-friends the longevity of illusions in ordinary people. At length he
-retires and reads himself to sleep. His last thoughts are the long, long
-thoughts of his perfect taste and tireless industry, and of the
-aesthetic darkness which covers the earth. . . .
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Such was the young man I inimically beheld. And I was not satisfied with
-him. He was gorgeous, but not sufficiently gorgeous. He had done much in
-ten years, and I excused his facile pride, but he had not done enough.
-The curtain had risen on the first act of the drama of life, but the
-action, the intrigue, the passion seemed to hesitate and halt. Was this
-the artistic and creative life, this daily round? Was this the reality
-of that which I had dreamed? Where was the sense of romance, the
-consciousness of felicity? I felt that I had slipped into a groove which
-wore deeper every day. It seemed to me that I was fettered and tied
-down. I had grown weary of journalism. The necessity of being at a
-certain place at a certain hour on so many days of the week grew irksome
-to me; I regarded it as invasive of my rights as a freeborn Englishman,
-as shameful and scarcely tolerable. Was I a horse that I should be
-ridden on the curb by a Board of Directors? I objected to the theory of
-proprietors. The occasional conferences with the Board, though conducted
-with all the ritual of an extreme punctilio, were an indignity. The
-suave requests of the chairman: "Will you kindly tell us&mdash;&mdash;?"
-And my defensive replies, and then the dismissal: "Thank you,
-Mr.&mdash;&mdash;, I think we need trouble you no further this morning."
-And my exit, irritated by the thought that I was about to be discussed
-with the freedom that Boards in conclave permit themselves. It was as
-bad as being bullied by London University at an examination. I longed to
-tell this Board, with whom I was so amicable on unofficial occasions,
-that they were using a razor to cut firewood. I longed to tell them that
-the nursing of their excellent and precious organ was seriously
-interfering with the composition of great works and the manufacture of a
-dazzling reputation. I longed to point out to them that the time would
-come when they would mention to their friends with elaborate casualness
-and covert pride that they had once employed me, the unique me, at a
-salary measurable in hundreds.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Further, I was ill-pleased with literary London. "You have a literary
-life here," an American editor once said to me. "There is a literary
-circle, an atmosphere. . . . We have no such thing in New York." I
-answered that no doubt we had; but I spoke without enthusiasm. I suppose
-that if any one "moved in literary circles," I did, then. Yet I derived
-small satisfaction from my inclusion within those circumferences. To me
-there was a lack of ozone in the atmosphere which the American editor
-found so invigorating. Be it understood that when I say "literary
-circles," I do not in the least mean genteel Bohemia, the world of
-informal At-Homes that are all formality, where the little lions growl
-on their chains in a row against a drawing-room wall, and the hostess
-congratulates herself that every single captive in the salon has "done
-something." Such polite racketting, such discreet orgies of the higher
-intellectuality, may suit the elegant triflers, the authors of
-monographs on Velasquez, golf, Dante, asparagus, royalties, ping-pong,
-and Empire; but the business men who write from ten to fifty thousands
-words a week without chattering about it, have no use for the literary
-menagerie. I lived among the real business men&mdash;and even so I was
-dissatisfied. I believe too that they were dissatisfied, most of them.
-There is an infection in the air of London, a zymotic influence which is
-the mysterious cause of unnaturalness, pose, affectation, artificiality,
-moral neuritis, and satiety. One loses grasp of the essentials in an
-undue preoccupation with the vacuities which society has invented. The
-distractions are too multiform. One never gets a chance to talk
-common-sense with one's soul.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-Thirdly, the rate at which I was making headway did not please me. My
-reputation was growing, but only like a coral-reef. Many people had an
-eye on me, as on one for whom the future held big things. Many people
-took care to read almost all that I wrote. But my name had no
-significance for the general public. The mention of my name would have
-brought no recognizing smile to the average person who is "fond of
-reading." I wanted to do something large, arresting, and decisive. And I
-saw no chance of doing this. I had too many irons in the fire. I was
-frittering myself away in a multitude of diverse activities of the pen.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I pondered upon these considerations for a long while. I saw only one
-way out, and, at last, circumstances appearing to conspire to lead me
-into that way, I wrote a letter to my Board of Directors and resigned my
-editorial post. I had decided to abandon London, that delectable
-paradise of my youthful desires. A To-let notice flourished suddenly in
-my front-garden, and my world became aware that I was going to desert
-it. The majority thought me rash and unwise, and predicted an
-ignominious return to Fleet Street. But the minority upheld my
-resolution. I reached down a map of England, and said that I must live
-on a certain main-line at a certain minimum distance from London. This
-fixed the neighbourhood of my future home. The next thing was to find
-that home, and with the aid of friends and a bicycle I soon found it.
-One fine wet day I stole out of London in a new quest of romance. No one
-seemed to be fundamentally disturbed over my exodus. I remarked to
-myself: "Either you are a far-seeing and bold fellow, or you are a fool.
-Time will show which." And that night I slept, or failed to sleep, in a
-house that was half a mile from the next house, three miles from a
-station, and three miles from a town. I had left the haunts of men with
-a vengeance, and incidentally I had left a regular income.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-I ran over the list of our foremost writers: they nearly all lived in
-the country.
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4><a id="XVI">XVI</a></h4>
-<p><br /></p>
-
-<p>
-When I had settled down into the landscape, bought my live-stock,
-studied manuals on horses, riding, driving, hunting, dogs, poultry, and
-wildflowers, learned to distinguish between wheat and barley and between
-a six-year-old and an aged screw, shot a sparrow on the fence only to
-find it was a redbreast, drunk the cherry-brandy of the Elizabethan inn,
-played in the village cricket team, and ceased to feel self-conscious in
-riding-breeches, I perceived with absolute certainty that I had made no
-error; I knew that, come poverty or the riches of Indian short stories,
-I should never again live permanently in London. I expanded, and in my
-expansion I felt rather sorry for Londoners. I perceived, too, that the
-country possessed commercial advantages which I had failed to appreciate
-before. When you live two and a half miles from a railway you can cut a
-dash on an income which in London spells omnibus instead of cab. For
-myself I have a profound belief in the efficacy of cutting a dash. You
-invite an influential friend down for the week-end. You meet him at the
-station with a nice little grey mare in a phaeton, and an unimpeachable
-Dalmatian running behind. The turn-out is nothing alone, but the
-pedigree printed in the pinkiness of that dog's chaps and in the
-exiguity of his tail, spotted to the last inch, would give tone to a
-coster's cart. You see that your influential friend wishes to comment,
-but as you gather up the reins you carefully begin to talk about the
-weather and prices per thousand. You rush him home in twelve minutes,
-skimming gate posts. On Monday morning, purposely running it fine, you
-hurry him into a dog-cart behind a brown cob fresh from a pottle of
-beans, and you whirl him back to the station in ten minutes, up-hill
-half the way. You fling him into the train, with ten seconds to spare.
-"This is how we do it in these parts," your studiously nonchalant face
-says to him. He thinks. In a few hours Fleet Street becomes aware that
-young So-and-so, who lately buried himself in the country, is alive and
-lusty. Your stock rises. You go up one. You extort respect. You are
-ticketed in the retentive brains of literary shahs as a success. And you
-still have the dog left for another day.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-In the country there is plenty of space and plenty of time, and no
-damnable fixed relation between these two; in other words, a particular
-hour does not imply a particular spot for you, and this is something to
-an author. I found my days succeeding each other with a leisurely and
-adorable monotony. I lingered over breakfast like a lord, perusing the
-previous evening's papers with as much gusto as though they were hot
-from the press. I looked sideways at my work, with a non-committal air,
-as if saying; "I may do you or I may not. I shall see how I feel." I
-went out for a walk, followed by dogs less spectacular than the
-Dalmatian, to collect ideas. I had nothing to think about but my own
-direct productiveness. I stopped to examine the progress of trees, to
-discuss meteorology with roadmenders, to wonder why lambs always waggled
-their tails during the act of taking sustenance. All was calmness,
-serenity. The embryo of the article or the chapter faintly adumbrated
-itself in my mind, assumed a form. One idea, then another; then an
-altercation with the dogs, ending in castigation, disillusion, and
-pessimism for them. Suddenly I exclaimed: "I think I've got enough to go
-on with!" And I turned back homewards. I reached my study and sat down.
-From my windows I beheld a magnificent panorama of hills. Now the
-contemplation of hills is uplifting to the soul; it leads to inspiration
-and induces nobility of character, but it has a tendency to interfere
-with actual composition. I stared long at those hills. Should I work,
-should I not work? A brief period always ensued when the odds were
-tremendous against any work being done that day. Then I seized the pen
-and wrote the title. Then another dreadful and disconcerting pause, all
-ideas having scuttled away like mice to their holes. Well, I must put
-something down, however ridiculous. I wrote a sentence, feeling first
-that it would not serve and then that it would have to serve, anyway. I
-glanced at the clock. Ten twenty-five! I watched the clock in a sort of
-hypnotism that authors know of, till it showed ten-thirty. Then with a
-horrible wrench I put the pen in the ink again . . . . Jove! Eleven
-forty-five, and I had written seven hundred words. Not bad stuff that!
-Indeed, very good! Time for a cigarette and a stroll round to hear
-wisdom from the gardener. I resumed at twelve, and then in about two
-minutes it was one o'clock and lunch time. After lunch, rest for the
-weary and the digesting; slumber; another stroll. Arrival of the second
-post on a Russian pony that cost fifty shillings. Tea, and perusal of
-the morning paper. Then another spell of work, and the day was gone,
-vanished, distilled away. And about five days made a week, and
-forty-eight weeks a year.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-No newspaper-proprietors, contributors, circulations, placards,
-tape-machines, theatres, operas, concerts, picture-galleries, clubs,
-restaurants, parties, Undergrounds! Nothing artificial, except myself
-and my work! And nothing, save the fear of rent-day, to come between
-myself and my work!
-</p>
-
-<p>
-It was dull, you will tell me. But I tell you it was magnificent.
-Monotony, solitude, are essential to the full activity of the artist.
-Just as a horse is seen best when coursing alone over a great plain, so
-the fierce and callous egotism of the artist comes to its perfection in
-a vast expanse of custom, leisure, and apparently vacuous reverie. To
-insist on forgetting his work, to keep his mind a blank until the work,
-no longer to be held in check, rushes into that emptiness and fills it
-up&mdash;that is one of the secrets of imaginative creation. Of course it
-is not a recipe for every artist. I have known artists, and genuine ones,
-who could keep their minds empty and suck in the beauty of the world for
-evermore without the slightest difficulty; who only wrote, as the early
-Britons hunted, when they were hungry and there was nothing in the pot.
-But I was not of that species. On the contrary, the incurable habit of
-industry, the itch for the pen, was my chiefest curse. To be
-unproductive for more than a couple of days or so was to be miserable.
-Like most writers I was frequently the victim of an illogical,
-indefensible and causeless melancholy; but one kind of melancholy could
-always be explained, and that was the melancholy of idleness. I could
-never divert myself with hobbies. I did not read much, except in the way
-of business. Two hours reading, even of Turgenev or Balzac or Montaigne,
-wearied me out. An author once remarked to me; "<i>I know enough. I don't
-read books, I write 'em</i>." It was a haughty and arrogant saying, but
-there is a sense in which it was true. Often I have felt like that: "I
-know enough, I feel enough. If my future is as long as my past, I shall
-still not be able to put down the tenth part of what I have already
-acquired." The consciousness of this, of what an extraordinary and
-wonderful museum of perceptions and emotions my brain was, sustained me
-many a time against the chagrins, the delays, and the defeats of the
-artistic career. Often have I said inwardly: "World, when I talk with
-you, dine with you, wrangle with you, love you, and hate you, I
-condescend!" Every artist has said that. People call it conceit; people
-may call it what they please. One of the greatest things a great man
-said, is:&mdash;
-</p>
-
-<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
-<span class="i2">I know I am august</span><br />
-<span class="i2">I do not trouble my spirit to indicate itself or to be</span><br />
-<span class="i3">understood . . .</span><br />
-<span class="i2">I exist as I am, that is enough.</span><br />
-<span class="i2">If no other in the world be aware I sit content.</span><br />
-<span class="i2">And if each and all be aware I sit content.</span>
-</div></div>
-
-<p>
-Nevertheless, for me, the contentment of the ultimate line surpassed the
-contentment of the penultimate. And therefore it was, perhaps, that I
-descended on London from time to time like a wolf on the fold, and made
-the world aware, and snatched its feverish joys for a space, and then,
-surfeited and advertised, went back and relapsed into my long monotony.
-And sometimes I would suddenly halt and address myself:
-</p>
-
-<p>
-"You may be richer or you may be poorer; you may live in greater pomp
-and luxury, or in less. The point is that you will always be,
-essentially, what you are now. You have no real satisfaction to look
-forward to except the satisfaction of continually inventing, fancying,
-imagining, scribbling. Say another thirty years of these emotional
-ingenuities, these interminable variations on the theme of beauty. Is it
-good enough?"
-</p>
-
-<p>
-And I answered: Yes.
-</p>
-
-<p>
-But who knows? Who can preclude the regrets of the dying couch?
-</p>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
-<h4>THE END</h4>
-
-<p><br /><br /><br /></p>
-
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