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+This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements,
+metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be
+in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES.
+
+Procedures for determining public domain status are described in
+the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org.
+
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #66397 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/66397)
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-The Project Gutenberg eBook of Welcome to Paradise, by Allyn Donnelson
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you
-will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before
-using this eBook.
-
-Title: Welcome to Paradise
-
-Author: Allyn Donnelson
-
-Release Date: September 27, 2021 [eBook #66397]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-Produced by: Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online Distributed
- Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
-
-*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK WELCOME TO PARADISE ***
-
-
-
-
- WELCOME TO PARADISE
-
- By Allyn Donnelson
-
- A civilian like me has no business getting
- mixed up in top secret government projects. But
- this one I got into--and you should be as lucky!
-
- [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from
- Imagination Stories of Science and Fantasy
- September 1954
- Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that
- the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]
-
-
-President of the United States
-
-The White House
-
-Washington, D.C.
-
-Dear Mr. President:
-
-I don't know who else to appeal to about the fix I'm in, because I'm
-afraid I would be revealing top secret material to someone who isn't
-entitled to hear it. That's why I wouldn't tell the FBI anything and
-that's why I told them I don't want a lawyer.
-
-I know you've got lots on your mind, Mr. President, and I hope hearing
-about my blunder doesn't throw you off your game this weekend or
-anything like that, but I sure would appreciate it if you could find
-time to help me out.
-
-You see, I'm not a spy, and I sure didn't stumble into this stuff of my
-own accord, but how was I to know I was setting off a spark that had
-something to do with space travel? After all, when you stop to think
-about it, I only did what the foreman told me to, but he didn't know
-any better either, so I wouldn't want to get him in Dutch.
-
-You see, I work at the Diversified Metal Products Co. up here in
-Chicago. I'm a spot welder and one job I had to do about every six
-weeks was make six welds on a geedunk we called a "manhole cover." We
-didn't know what they were, except that they were something special for
-the Signal Corps, and they looked about as much like manhole covers as
-anything else.
-
-Well, the way the work is supposed to be scheduled, my welding job is
-the first thing after it comes off the presses, just before the little
-coils are put in. So the foreman comes over to me one night--it was
-October 10, the last day of the World Series--and shows me one of the
-covers after it's been wired up. One of the welds has come loose--maybe
-because the material was dirty or something like that--and it looks
-like the whole thing will have to be scrapped.
-
-So he says to me "Tuck" (my name is Joe Peters, but they call me Tuck
-for Kentucky where I come from)--he says, "Tuck, do you suppose you
-can save this piece by welding it again, right there between those two
-coils?"
-
-I look the geedunk over, and there isn't much room to play around, but
-I decide it's not near enough the coils to melt the wires. So if I
-spoil it, so what? It'd be scrap anyhow. How was I to know the points
-of the welder would establish an electrical contact?
-
-So I take the piece and tell him I'll try it after I finish the
-truckload of stuff I'm working on. But along about coffee time, I go
-and burn my hand kind of bad on the welder, and have to get the nurse
-to bandage it up for me, and that slows me up a good bit.
-
-Everybody else in the department had left for washup by the time I put
-the gismo in the machine. I kicked the pedal just like I always do, and
-whoosh! I was out like a rookie the first time he faces Allie Reynolds.
-Seems like I saw a flash of bluish-greenish light, but I don't know for
-sure.
-
- * * * * *
-
-Next thing I knew, a squatty guy with broad shoulders and bushy
-eyebrows was standing over me. He said, "Well, did the Yankees win the
-Series?" and his accent sounded like he should be following the Dodgers
-instead.
-
-I looked around. It was kinda dark, like just after the sun goes down.
-I was sitting on a big strip of limestone, and I could see a few trees
-and some small hills, and lots more of those limestone rocks, or
-cliffs. It wasn't like any part of the country I've ever seen before.
-
-The guy starts giving me the once over, too. "What monkey in that zoo
-they call the Pentagon picked _you_ for a job like this? I knew the
-Defense Department was hard up, but I didn't think they were _that_
-hard up!"
-
-Then I notice this geezer has a uniform sporting top sergeant's
-stripes. I jump up and back away from him.
-
-"Look," I says, "I don't know what happened, but I know I didn't
-volunteer for no army job, and I'm too old to be drafted again. I must
-have had amnesia. I wanna lawyer. Lemmee out of here--you're not giving
-me that army routine again--no siree."
-
-(Mr. President, please don't misunderstand me. I'm as patriotic as the
-next guy, and I assure you I won't shirk no duty if I'm needed, but I
-don't have to _like_ it, do I?)
-
-The guy's dumbfounded. He doesn't give me a strong-arm deal like I'd
-expect from a top-sarge--he just looks as if he can't figure it out.
-Then he grabs me by the shoulder.
-
-"Wait a minute, Mac, let's sit down and talk this over. Who the hell
-are you? Where did you come from? Who sent you?"
-
-I'm about to say "Groucho sent me," but I decide maybe I'd better be
-serious. I tell him my name, and that I ain't got the faintest idea
-where I am.
-
-"Okay, Tuck," he says. "They call me Yogi. Now let's take it from the
-beginning, slow and easy, huh?"
-
-So I tell him what happened in the plant, and before I get done Yogi is
-laughing like crazy, in fact he sits down on the rock and almost knocks
-himself out.
-
-"Well, what in Sam Hill is so all-fired funny? Who kidnapped me while I
-was knocked out and dumped me on this God-forsaken army post?"
-
-Yogi manages to stop laughing. He takes me across a strip of this
-funny-looking, bare limestone rock, where a contraption is standing
-that looks like a radio tower about ten feet high. Inside it is a
-box about the size and shape of those reducing cabinets you see in
-cartoons. The top to the box is open, and Yogi points to it.
-
-"Is this the kind of doohicky you're talking about--what you call a
-manhole cover?"
-
-I look close, and sure enough, that's just what it is. I nod to Yogi,
-and he sighs real serious like.
-
-"Well, Tuck, my boy, you maybe made yourself famous tonight. One thing
-for sure--you're the first civilian to travel by HHF, and the first one
-to set foot on Lunette."
-
-"And where on God's green earth is Lunette?"
-
-"That's what's so funny, Tuck. It's not on God's green earth at all.
-Lunette is a satellite of the Earth, discovered just a few months ago.
-It's a sort of little moon--that's why we named it Lunette. It's got
-enough atmosphere so we don't need space suits, and it's about half-way
-between Earth and the moon."
-
- * * * * *
-
-I guess I was giving him a "tell me another" look. He pointed in back
-of me. "Look at the moon coming up over there, if you don't believe me.
-Did you ever see anything like that on Earth?"
-
-That convinced me. The old moon was huge, and I could see mountains and
-rivers and seas on it, and even that natural bridge I'd read about.
-Besides, I could even see the curve of the ground on Lunette!
-
-But how in blazes did I get here?
-
-"This contraption," Yogi explains, "we call a Matter BARS, short for
-Matter Broadcasting and Receiving Station. It works on HHF--hyper
-high frequency--and instead of sending out the ordinary type of
-radio wave lengths it broadcasts matter. It won't work between two
-points on Earth; it has to have a distance of at least 200,000 miles
-to bounce from. We bounce stuff off the moon, and broadcast people,
-equipment--anything of less than 250 pounds--between Earth and Lunette."
-
-"Who bounces them? Who in tarnation bounced me here?"
-
-"You bounced yourself, friend. Your spotweld machine set up a contact
-here between these two coils. Our regular operators establish contact
-by moving these two balls near each other like a Leyden jar. Your
-machine had the same effect, and whoosh, here you are."
-
-"Look, Bud, I remember a Leyden jar from high school science, but
-durned if I follow the rest of that malarky."
-
-Yogi's getting impatient with me. "It's very simple, Peters. Suppose
-you wandered into a TV studio when the circuits were open--your picture
-and voice would be broadcast over that station. Well, that Matter BARS
-cover was set at the right frequency for sending objects or people to
-Lunette and you were broadcast here. You wouldn't have been knocked out
-if you had been inside the insulating cabinet; it would have just felt
-like a sneeze."
-
-"So what are you doing here?" This guy is selling me fast.
-
-"Guess I'd probably better let the CO talk to you about that. But first
-tell me about the Series."
-
-So we bat the breeze a while about what is going on back on Earth,
-and I start to wonder how am I going to get back there. Yogi tells me
-to let the CO worry about that, and in the meantime offers to show me
-around the joint.
-
-There's not much to see on Lunette--nothing but salt water lakes,
-limestone cliffs, a few scrawny trees, and some weird bushes with round
-things dangling from them that you'd think was grapefruit, or something
-like that, until you found out they were hard as coconuts.
-
-All of the plant life looked like the chlorophyll people had been there
-already, and had taken a big haul back to their toothpaste factories.
-The grass and leaves were either a kind of chartreuse or a pale color
-like weak orangeade. Finally we take off for the CO.
-
- * * * * *
-
-The Captain turned out to be a right guy, but he sure was upset about
-the security angle. He couldn't help grinning, though, when Yogi said,
-
-"I still think it's damned funny that a civilian could stumble into a
-top secret army base 100,000 miles from home!"
-
-"Well, Peters," the Captain said, "we can't very well send you back
-tonight anyway, because both the regular station and the test station
-at your plant in Chicago are closed now. Under ordinary circumstances
-I'd have to lock you up, but I don't see how you can escape from us! Go
-bunk with Yogi and let me think it over."
-
-He stopped us as we started out of the tent. "And men, keep your lips
-buttoned."
-
-We join the fellows and talked about baseball for a couple hours. We
-organized a game for the next day, and I agreed to play shortstop,
-even though I'm hoping I won't be around for it. The Captain's remarks
-hadn't made me feel too easy on that score.
-
-I ask Yogi how come all the bicycles over by the pueblo castle and he
-explains that they can be broadcast, unassembled, where the parts to a
-jeep or any other big vehicle would be too heavy for the Matter BARS
-to handle. He says they're used by the crews assigned to surveying and
-mapping Lunette, making geological and botanical surveys, and that sort
-of thing.
-
-Yogi gets me a sleeping bag and we stretch out under the stars in front
-of the limestone castle. (Man, that thing is pretty in the moonlight,
-Mr. President.) Lanterns hanging in some of the caves made it sparkle
-here and there like a giant hunk of jewelry. And I never breathed such
-fresh, sweet air as that, anyplace.
-
-The next day the CO calls Yogi in for a conference that doesn't include
-me, so I get in on the baseball game after all. It was a lot of fun,
-too. Lunette's gravity is much less that of Earth so I made some pretty
-wild throws until I got oriented.
-
-At chow time I latched onto Yogi. "Hey, kid, when do I get out of here?
-This is a fine adventure, but after all, I got obligations back on
-Earth."
-
-"It may not be that easy, Tuck. The Captain doesn't know what to do. HQ
-is going to bust a gasket when they find out about you. After all, the
-Captain is the only one who has made any trips back since we got here,
-and the project is so secret that not more than 20 people on Earth have
-any inkling of it."
-
-I began to flip my lid. "Yogi," I said, "how much does this project
-cost?"
-
-"Plenty, Tuck, more than you'd imagine. The equipment the guys use for
-their surveys is pretty high-powered stuff. Why?"
-
-"Because it's coming out of my pocket, that's why. And me and a lot of
-my buddies who are paying the freight on these deals are getting sick
-of hearing that only two or three or twenty people in the whole USA
-knows about this or that secret project. Security is okay, but don't
-you think we ought to know something about what our money's going for?"
-
-Boy, am I a genius at putting my foot in it! The lighter gravity on
-Lunette must of gone to my head. Yogi gave me a real funny look, got up
-from the mess table, and walked off.
-
- * * * * *
-
-I started to sweat. What the heck made me blow off like that? Now they
-really would think I was a security risk, and maybe they'd decide not
-to let me go back at all, at least not until they had a court-martial
-or something. Naturally I have plenty of respect for military secrets;
-it's just that I think voters should have a little more information and
-a little more say-so about how our money is spent. It's a sore point
-with me. But what a stupid time I pick to sound off about it!
-
-A soldier comes along and tells me the CO wants to see me. Now I know
-this is it.
-
-But Yogi and the Captain both looked as friendly as ever. "Peters," the
-CO said, "I think you can be useful to us."
-
-Oh, oh, here it comes. They're going to try to talk me into staying up
-here.
-
-"I suppose you have figured out by now what the Lunette Project is all
-about," the Captain went on. "You remember stories in the papers a few
-years ago on the possibility of creating an artificial satellite to use
-as a base for guided missiles in case of war?"
-
-I nodded.
-
-"The stories were hushed up pretty fast, and the reason was that
-Lunette was discovered just about then. They stopped talking about it
-just as they stopped talking about atomic research after the Manhattan
-project started."
-
-"Listen, Captain, please," I said. "Beg pardon for interrupting, but
-please don't tell me anything a civilian isn't supposed to know,
-because--no offense--I don't want to get roped into the Army just
-because I know too much."
-
-"No offense to _you_, Peters--I'm not trying to get you into the Army."
-He grinned, and I felt a lot better. "Let me go on. Yogi tells me that
-he explained to you something about the Matter BARS. Did you understand
-it?"
-
-"Pretty well, sir. He should have been a teacher if he could make me
-see a glimmer of light in that stuff."
-
-The Captain laughed and Yogi got red.
-
-"He was. Assistant Professor of Electronics at Columbia, before the
-Signal Corps persuaded him to become a Space Cadet."
-
-My face was red then.
-
-"Well, on the military nature of our mission we have just a few more
-wrinkles to iron out," the Captain went on, "but something else has
-come up that we think has a lot more significance than guided missiles."
-
-"I told the Captain I thought you'd help us," Yogi said, "because of
-what you said about secret projects a while ago."
-
-Now I _am_ confused. So I don't like so much secrecy, so they think I
-can help their project? I don't get it. I don't get it at all.
-
-"Yogi will explain the science part," the Captain said. "I'm just a
-publicity man myself, not a teacher. But as a publicity man, Peters, I
-think we can use you. Would you be game to try a job that could be very
-important?"
-
-I nodded, still confused but willing.
-
-Yogi started by explaining that Lunette came into existence about a
-hundred million years ago, a figure the geologists came up with by
-measuring the radioactivity of the uranium here and comparing it with
-that of uranium on Earth.
-
-"But, in studying the radioactivity of the elements here," he said, "we
-have discovered something else ... something that could change the
-whole picture of things back on Earth. We found out about it, at least
-a glimmer of it, almost as soon as we got up here, but we wanted to run
-a whole slew of experiments before we let ourselves believe that it was
-true.
-
-"Say, Tuck, what's that bandage on your hand for?"
-
- * * * * *
-
-I was surprised at his sudden change of subject, but I told him how I
-had burned my hand on the spotweld machine the night before.
-
-"Does it hurt now?"
-
-"Heck, it ain't nothing, Yogi. Let's get on with my physics lesson."
-
-"Do me a favor, please. Take off the bandage."
-
-He was real serious, so I unwound the bandage the nurse put on. There
-was just a tiny white scar where the burn had been. It looked like I
-had done it at least a couple of weeks ago!
-
-Yogi and the Captain looked at each other and grinned like they were
-real proud of something.
-
-"That's part of the lesson, Tuck. Our big discovery is that the
-increased radioactivity of the elements here on Lunette seems to have
-a miraculous healing power on any infectious or communicable disease,
-and on any injury to body tissues. Maybe you remember reading a little
-about the strange effect that the Bikini tests had on some of the
-animals used experimentally."
-
-I nodded.
-
-Yogi continued. "We don't know yet just how this radioactivity works on
-the body. In fact, we're not even sure it is the radioactivity alone.
-There may be some added effect from the Lunette climate or water. But
-we have proved, to the satisfaction of everyone here, that almost all
-Earth diseases and most injuries can be cured on Lunette.
-
-"The mess sergeant had a trick knee when he came here. The trouble
-disappeared completely when we arrived. One of the geologists had an
-ulcer. Hasn't felt a pain since the second day. Another guy had some
-bad powder burns from a lab experiment that disappeared over night,
-just like your burn did.
-
-"When we first suspected what was going on, we asked the crew at Silver
-Spring to send up white rats, guinea pigs, and dogs, with everything
-from cancer and T.B. through rabies to polio, and the results were one
-hundred per cent perfect, with complete recovery in every case inside
-of a week. _And_, this is important, they stayed cured when sent back
-to Earth."
-
-Yogi's eyes were burning like one of them gospel preachers at a
-revival, and his voice was shaking. I was catching the excitement
-myself. The Captain took over the story.
-
-"I suppose you're wondering what we want of you?"
-
-"I sure am. This is a big deal, isn't it?" I looked at the little scar
-on my hand again, to convince myself nobody was kidding.
-
-"Here's our problem, and our plan, Tuck. Yogi told me what you said
-about the taxpayers' right to know where their money is going, and it
-ties in with what a lot of us up here have been discussing.
-
-"Most of our fellows are like Yogi--technicians who chose their line
-of work because they thought they could help make the world a better
-place to live in. Now that they have the chance to make the biggest
-contribution of their whole lives, they're all hemmed in by military
-rigamarole and red tape. It goes against the grain for scientists."
-
-"You mean the Army is keeping the place top secret, so it can't be used
-for a ... well, a health resort?"
-
-The Captain nodded. "I'm not arguing with the military reasons for
-security. Maybe they're right on that score. But in the meantime,
-thousands of people are dying every day of disease, needlessly, while
-the Army keeps the secret that could end those deaths. The people
-will find out about it eventually, and I don't think they'll like it.
-Suppose your mother were to die of cancer a few months from now, and
-you were to find out later that her death was unnecessary, and that
-your own government could have stopped it. What would you think? How
-about it, Peters, are you with us? What do you say?"
-
- * * * * *
-
-The Captain had been talking louder and faster till he was practically
-out of breath.
-
-"I got just one thing to say, Captain. My baby sister died of T.B.
-just before her eighteenth birthday last year. You can bet your bottom
-nickel I'm with you on this deal, right down the line. Just give me the
-scoop. I'll go along."
-
-Yogi and the CO slapped me on the back.
-
-They explained to me, Mr. President, all about this secret
-Congressional hearing to be held on the Lunette project next week, and
-how I should go to Washington and get my Congressman to spring me as a
-surprise witness--a civilian who had been to Lunette and knew the score.
-
-They knew all about what strings to pull to be sure I could get in,
-and they helped me figure out what I should say. They seemed to think
-that my word, you know, the guy on the street or something like that,
-would carry some weight and make Congress see that the health angle on
-this Lunette project is a darned sight more important than keeping the
-secret of a guided missile station. Why, for Pete's sake, Mr. President
-Uncle Sam owns Lunette, doesn't he? When the other side hears about
-this they'll want to get in on it so bad they'll be awful anxious
-to stay in our good graces. Probably turn out to be an even better
-military defense than guided missiles.
-
-Time was important now, so just at five o'clock, when I generally
-report for work, Yogi and I walked down to the Matter BARS and shook
-hands. Yogi took a polaroid picture of me standing there and gave me
-the print. You know, Mr. President, I kind of hated to leave. That
-Lunette sure is a pretty place.
-
-Yogi moved the two little balls together, and sure enough, like he had
-told me, I felt like I was catching a fit of sneezing. That was all,
-and there I was back at Diversified, in the restricted Signal Corps
-section, with the inspector staring at me.
-
-He looks ready to pull a gun on me, so I laugh at him, nervous as
-heck inside but trying not to show it. "What's the matter, you seen a
-ghost?"
-
-"How did you get in that cabinet, Peters?" He's really mad, and I'm
-wondering if I can pull it off.
-
-"Well, I know you spend all your time over here by yourself, so I
-thought maybe someone should break the monotony. I just crawled in
-there a couple of minutes ago to surprise you." (That was true in a
-way, wasn't it?)
-
-"Don't do that again, Peters. No harm done, I guess, but if I had moved
-those two little balls together without seeing you in there I don't
-know what would have happened to you!"
-
-Mebbe you don't, but I do, I thought to myself. I scrammed out of there
-as soon as I was sure I had him sold on my story.
-
-And that's all there is to the story, Mr. President, except that last
-week like a darned fool I had to drop that picture. It was one Yogi
-took of me with his Polaroid, standing by the Matter BARS with a bunch
-of Lunette coconuts (the boys call them Ikenuts, sir).
-
-So my foreman sees the manhole cover in the picture and thinks that
-something must be funny and turns it in to our personnel manager. And
-_he_ turns it over to the FBI, and I wouldn't tell em anything, and
-here I am in the clink.
-
-So it looks like I've fouled up the boys' plans to use me as a secret
-weapon, and it looks like I've fouled up my own life real good unless
-you can figure out a way to help me.
-
-I think I will close now and leave the whole mess up to you.
-
- Obediently yours,
-
- Joe Peters.
-
- * * * * *
-
-THE WHITE HOUSE
-
-Washington, D. C.
-
-Dear Mr. Peters:
-
-We are happy to learn that, in accordance with instructions from this
-office, you have been reinstated in your job and that the FBI and your
-employer are reassured as to your loyalty.
-
-The President has asked me to extend his personal invitation to you to
-have lunch at the White House next Friday when you are in Washington
-for the hearing.
-
-Your story interested him so much that he investigated it personally
-and thoroughly. As a result he has a special surprise in store for
-Congress and the American people on Friday. All I can divulge to you at
-this time is that his barber fainted this morning when he called at the
-White House to give the President his weekly trim.
-
- Very truly yours,
-
- Robert Kenwood
-
- Special Assistant to the
-
- President of the United States
-
-*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK WELCOME TO PARADISE ***
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- The Project Gutenberg eBook of Welcome to Paradise, by Allyn Donnelson.
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-
-<div style='text-align:center; font-size:1.2em; font-weight:bold'>The Project Gutenberg eBook of Welcome to Paradise, by Allyn Donnelson</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online
-at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you
-are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the
-country where you are located before using this eBook.
-</div>
-
-<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: Welcome to Paradise</p>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: Allyn Donnelson</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: September 27, 2021 [eBook #66397]</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Character set encoding: UTF-8</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Produced by: Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net</div>
-
-<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK WELCOME TO PARADISE ***</div>
-
-<div class="titlepage">
-
-<div class="figcenter">
- <img src="images/illus.jpg" alt=""/>
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-
-<h1>WELCOME TO PARADISE</h1>
-
-<h2>By Allyn Donnelson</h2>
-
-<p>A civilian like me has no business getting<br />
-mixed up in top secret government projects. But<br />
-this one I got into&mdash;and you should be as lucky!</p>
-
-<p>[Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from<br />
-Imagination Stories of Science and Fantasy<br />
-September 1954<br />
-Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that<br />
-the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]</p>
-
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-
-<p>President of the United States<br />
-The White House<br />
-Washington, D.C.</p>
-
-<p>Dear Mr. President:</p>
-
-<p>I don't know who else to appeal to about the fix I'm in, because I'm
-afraid I would be revealing top secret material to someone who isn't
-entitled to hear it. That's why I wouldn't tell the FBI anything and
-that's why I told them I don't want a lawyer.</p>
-
-<p>I know you've got lots on your mind, Mr. President, and I hope hearing
-about my blunder doesn't throw you off your game this weekend or
-anything like that, but I sure would appreciate it if you could find
-time to help me out.</p>
-
-<p>You see, I'm not a spy, and I sure didn't stumble into this stuff of my
-own accord, but how was I to know I was setting off a spark that had
-something to do with space travel? After all, when you stop to think
-about it, I only did what the foreman told me to, but he didn't know
-any better either, so I wouldn't want to get him in Dutch.</p>
-
-<p>You see, I work at the Diversified Metal Products Co. up here in
-Chicago. I'm a spot welder and one job I had to do about every six
-weeks was make six welds on a geedunk we called a "manhole cover." We
-didn't know what they were, except that they were something special for
-the Signal Corps, and they looked about as much like manhole covers as
-anything else.</p>
-
-<p>Well, the way the work is supposed to be scheduled, my welding job is
-the first thing after it comes off the presses, just before the little
-coils are put in. So the foreman comes over to me one night&mdash;it was
-October 10, the last day of the World Series&mdash;and shows me one of the
-covers after it's been wired up. One of the welds has come loose&mdash;maybe
-because the material was dirty or something like that&mdash;and it looks
-like the whole thing will have to be scrapped.</p>
-
-<p>So he says to me "Tuck" (my name is Joe Peters, but they call me Tuck
-for Kentucky where I come from)&mdash;he says, "Tuck, do you suppose you
-can save this piece by welding it again, right there between those two
-coils?"</p>
-
-<p>I look the geedunk over, and there isn't much room to play around, but
-I decide it's not near enough the coils to melt the wires. So if I
-spoil it, so what? It'd be scrap anyhow. How was I to know the points
-of the welder would establish an electrical contact?</p>
-
-<p>So I take the piece and tell him I'll try it after I finish the
-truckload of stuff I'm working on. But along about coffee time, I go
-and burn my hand kind of bad on the welder, and have to get the nurse
-to bandage it up for me, and that slows me up a good bit.</p>
-
-<p>Everybody else in the department had left for washup by the time I put
-the gismo in the machine. I kicked the pedal just like I always do, and
-whoosh! I was out like a rookie the first time he faces Allie Reynolds.
-Seems like I saw a flash of bluish-greenish light, but I don't know for
-sure.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Next thing I knew, a squatty guy with broad shoulders and bushy
-eyebrows was standing over me. He said, "Well, did the Yankees win the
-Series?" and his accent sounded like he should be following the Dodgers
-instead.</p>
-
-<p>I looked around. It was kinda dark, like just after the sun goes down.
-I was sitting on a big strip of limestone, and I could see a few trees
-and some small hills, and lots more of those limestone rocks, or
-cliffs. It wasn't like any part of the country I've ever seen before.</p>
-
-<p>The guy starts giving me the once over, too. "What monkey in that zoo
-they call the Pentagon picked <i>you</i> for a job like this? I knew the
-Defense Department was hard up, but I didn't think they were <i>that</i>
-hard up!"</p>
-
-<p>Then I notice this geezer has a uniform sporting top sergeant's
-stripes. I jump up and back away from him.</p>
-
-<p>"Look," I says, "I don't know what happened, but I know I didn't
-volunteer for no army job, and I'm too old to be drafted again. I must
-have had amnesia. I wanna lawyer. Lemmee out of here&mdash;you're not giving
-me that army routine again&mdash;no siree."</p>
-
-<p>(Mr. President, please don't misunderstand me. I'm as patriotic as the
-next guy, and I assure you I won't shirk no duty if I'm needed, but I
-don't have to <i>like</i> it, do I?)</p>
-
-<p>The guy's dumbfounded. He doesn't give me a strong-arm deal like I'd
-expect from a top-sarge&mdash;he just looks as if he can't figure it out.
-Then he grabs me by the shoulder.</p>
-
-<p>"Wait a minute, Mac, let's sit down and talk this over. Who the hell
-are you? Where did you come from? Who sent you?"</p>
-
-<p>I'm about to say "Groucho sent me," but I decide maybe I'd better be
-serious. I tell him my name, and that I ain't got the faintest idea
-where I am.</p>
-
-<p>"Okay, Tuck," he says. "They call me Yogi. Now let's take it from the
-beginning, slow and easy, huh?"</p>
-
-<p>So I tell him what happened in the plant, and before I get done Yogi is
-laughing like crazy, in fact he sits down on the rock and almost knocks
-himself out.</p>
-
-<p>"Well, what in Sam Hill is so all-fired funny? Who kidnapped me while I
-was knocked out and dumped me on this God-forsaken army post?"</p>
-
-<p>Yogi manages to stop laughing. He takes me across a strip of this
-funny-looking, bare limestone rock, where a contraption is standing
-that looks like a radio tower about ten feet high. Inside it is a
-box about the size and shape of those reducing cabinets you see in
-cartoons. The top to the box is open, and Yogi points to it.</p>
-
-<p>"Is this the kind of doohicky you're talking about&mdash;what you call a
-manhole cover?"</p>
-
-<p>I look close, and sure enough, that's just what it is. I nod to Yogi,
-and he sighs real serious like.</p>
-
-<p>"Well, Tuck, my boy, you maybe made yourself famous tonight. One thing
-for sure&mdash;you're the first civilian to travel by HHF, and the first one
-to set foot on Lunette."</p>
-
-<p>"And where on God's green earth is Lunette?"</p>
-
-<p>"That's what's so funny, Tuck. It's not on God's green earth at all.
-Lunette is a satellite of the Earth, discovered just a few months ago.
-It's a sort of little moon&mdash;that's why we named it Lunette. It's got
-enough atmosphere so we don't need space suits, and it's about half-way
-between Earth and the moon."</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>I guess I was giving him a "tell me another" look. He pointed in back
-of me. "Look at the moon coming up over there, if you don't believe me.
-Did you ever see anything like that on Earth?"</p>
-
-<p>That convinced me. The old moon was huge, and I could see mountains and
-rivers and seas on it, and even that natural bridge I'd read about.
-Besides, I could even see the curve of the ground on Lunette!</p>
-
-<p>But how in blazes did I get here?</p>
-
-<p>"This contraption," Yogi explains, "we call a Matter BARS, short for
-Matter Broadcasting and Receiving Station. It works on HHF&mdash;hyper
-high frequency&mdash;and instead of sending out the ordinary type of
-radio wave lengths it broadcasts matter. It won't work between two
-points on Earth; it has to have a distance of at least 200,000 miles
-to bounce from. We bounce stuff off the moon, and broadcast people,
-equipment&mdash;anything of less than 250 pounds&mdash;between Earth and Lunette."</p>
-
-<p>"Who bounces them? Who in tarnation bounced me here?"</p>
-
-<p>"You bounced yourself, friend. Your spotweld machine set up a contact
-here between these two coils. Our regular operators establish contact
-by moving these two balls near each other like a Leyden jar. Your
-machine had the same effect, and whoosh, here you are."</p>
-
-<p>"Look, Bud, I remember a Leyden jar from high school science, but
-durned if I follow the rest of that malarky."</p>
-
-<p>Yogi's getting impatient with me. "It's very simple, Peters. Suppose
-you wandered into a TV studio when the circuits were open&mdash;your picture
-and voice would be broadcast over that station. Well, that Matter BARS
-cover was set at the right frequency for sending objects or people to
-Lunette and you were broadcast here. You wouldn't have been knocked out
-if you had been inside the insulating cabinet; it would have just felt
-like a sneeze."</p>
-
-<p>"So what are you doing here?" This guy is selling me fast.</p>
-
-<p>"Guess I'd probably better let the CO talk to you about that. But first
-tell me about the Series."</p>
-
-<p>So we bat the breeze a while about what is going on back on Earth,
-and I start to wonder how am I going to get back there. Yogi tells me
-to let the CO worry about that, and in the meantime offers to show me
-around the joint.</p>
-
-<p>There's not much to see on Lunette&mdash;nothing but salt water lakes,
-limestone cliffs, a few scrawny trees, and some weird bushes with round
-things dangling from them that you'd think was grapefruit, or something
-like that, until you found out they were hard as coconuts.</p>
-
-<p>All of the plant life looked like the chlorophyll people had been there
-already, and had taken a big haul back to their toothpaste factories.
-The grass and leaves were either a kind of chartreuse or a pale color
-like weak orangeade. Finally we take off for the CO.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>The Captain turned out to be a right guy, but he sure was upset about
-the security angle. He couldn't help grinning, though, when Yogi said,</p>
-
-<p>"I still think it's damned funny that a civilian could stumble into a
-top secret army base 100,000 miles from home!"</p>
-
-<p>"Well, Peters," the Captain said, "we can't very well send you back
-tonight anyway, because both the regular station and the test station
-at your plant in Chicago are closed now. Under ordinary circumstances
-I'd have to lock you up, but I don't see how you can escape from us! Go
-bunk with Yogi and let me think it over."</p>
-
-<p>He stopped us as we started out of the tent. "And men, keep your lips
-buttoned."</p>
-
-<p>We join the fellows and talked about baseball for a couple hours. We
-organized a game for the next day, and I agreed to play shortstop,
-even though I'm hoping I won't be around for it. The Captain's remarks
-hadn't made me feel too easy on that score.</p>
-
-<p>I ask Yogi how come all the bicycles over by the pueblo castle and he
-explains that they can be broadcast, unassembled, where the parts to a
-jeep or any other big vehicle would be too heavy for the Matter BARS
-to handle. He says they're used by the crews assigned to surveying and
-mapping Lunette, making geological and botanical surveys, and that sort
-of thing.</p>
-
-<p>Yogi gets me a sleeping bag and we stretch out under the stars in front
-of the limestone castle. (Man, that thing is pretty in the moonlight,
-Mr. President.) Lanterns hanging in some of the caves made it sparkle
-here and there like a giant hunk of jewelry. And I never breathed such
-fresh, sweet air as that, anyplace.</p>
-
-<p>The next day the CO calls Yogi in for a conference that doesn't include
-me, so I get in on the baseball game after all. It was a lot of fun,
-too. Lunette's gravity is much less that of Earth so I made some pretty
-wild throws until I got oriented.</p>
-
-<p>At chow time I latched onto Yogi. "Hey, kid, when do I get out of here?
-This is a fine adventure, but after all, I got obligations back on
-Earth."</p>
-
-<p>"It may not be that easy, Tuck. The Captain doesn't know what to do. HQ
-is going to bust a gasket when they find out about you. After all, the
-Captain is the only one who has made any trips back since we got here,
-and the project is so secret that not more than 20 people on Earth have
-any inkling of it."</p>
-
-<p>I began to flip my lid. "Yogi," I said, "how much does this project
-cost?"</p>
-
-<p>"Plenty, Tuck, more than you'd imagine. The equipment the guys use for
-their surveys is pretty high-powered stuff. Why?"</p>
-
-<p>"Because it's coming out of my pocket, that's why. And me and a lot of
-my buddies who are paying the freight on these deals are getting sick
-of hearing that only two or three or twenty people in the whole USA
-knows about this or that secret project. Security is okay, but don't
-you think we ought to know something about what our money's going for?"</p>
-
-<p>Boy, am I a genius at putting my foot in it! The lighter gravity on
-Lunette must of gone to my head. Yogi gave me a real funny look, got up
-from the mess table, and walked off.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>I started to sweat. What the heck made me blow off like that? Now they
-really would think I was a security risk, and maybe they'd decide not
-to let me go back at all, at least not until they had a court-martial
-or something. Naturally I have plenty of respect for military secrets;
-it's just that I think voters should have a little more information and
-a little more say-so about how our money is spent. It's a sore point
-with me. But what a stupid time I pick to sound off about it!</p>
-
-<p>A soldier comes along and tells me the CO wants to see me. Now I know
-this is it.</p>
-
-<p>But Yogi and the Captain both looked as friendly as ever. "Peters," the
-CO said, "I think you can be useful to us."</p>
-
-<p>Oh, oh, here it comes. They're going to try to talk me into staying up
-here.</p>
-
-<p>"I suppose you have figured out by now what the Lunette Project is all
-about," the Captain went on. "You remember stories in the papers a few
-years ago on the possibility of creating an artificial satellite to use
-as a base for guided missiles in case of war?"</p>
-
-<p>I nodded.</p>
-
-<p>"The stories were hushed up pretty fast, and the reason was that
-Lunette was discovered just about then. They stopped talking about it
-just as they stopped talking about atomic research after the Manhattan
-project started."</p>
-
-<p>"Listen, Captain, please," I said. "Beg pardon for interrupting, but
-please don't tell me anything a civilian isn't supposed to know,
-because&mdash;no offense&mdash;I don't want to get roped into the Army just
-because I know too much."</p>
-
-<p>"No offense to <i>you</i>, Peters&mdash;I'm not trying to get you into the Army."
-He grinned, and I felt a lot better. "Let me go on. Yogi tells me that
-he explained to you something about the Matter BARS. Did you understand
-it?"</p>
-
-<p>"Pretty well, sir. He should have been a teacher if he could make me
-see a glimmer of light in that stuff."</p>
-
-<p>The Captain laughed and Yogi got red.</p>
-
-<p>"He was. Assistant Professor of Electronics at Columbia, before the
-Signal Corps persuaded him to become a Space Cadet."</p>
-
-<p>My face was red then.</p>
-
-<p>"Well, on the military nature of our mission we have just a few more
-wrinkles to iron out," the Captain went on, "but something else has
-come up that we think has a lot more significance than guided missiles."</p>
-
-<p>"I told the Captain I thought you'd help us," Yogi said, "because of
-what you said about secret projects a while ago."</p>
-
-<p>Now I <i>am</i> confused. So I don't like so much secrecy, so they think I
-can help their project? I don't get it. I don't get it at all.</p>
-
-<p>"Yogi will explain the science part," the Captain said. "I'm just a
-publicity man myself, not a teacher. But as a publicity man, Peters, I
-think we can use you. Would you be game to try a job that could be very
-important?"</p>
-
-<p>I nodded, still confused but willing.</p>
-
-<p>Yogi started by explaining that Lunette came into existence about a
-hundred million years ago, a figure the geologists came up with by
-measuring the radioactivity of the uranium here and comparing it with
-that of uranium on Earth.</p>
-
-<p>"But, in studying the radioactivity of the elements here," he said, "we
-have discovered something else ... something that could change the
-whole picture of things back on Earth. We found out about it, at least
-a glimmer of it, almost as soon as we got up here, but we wanted to run
-a whole slew of experiments before we let ourselves believe that it was
-true.</p>
-
-<p>"Say, Tuck, what's that bandage on your hand for?"</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>I was surprised at his sudden change of subject, but I told him how I
-had burned my hand on the spotweld machine the night before.</p>
-
-<p>"Does it hurt now?"</p>
-
-<p>"Heck, it ain't nothing, Yogi. Let's get on with my physics lesson."</p>
-
-<p>"Do me a favor, please. Take off the bandage."</p>
-
-<p>He was real serious, so I unwound the bandage the nurse put on. There
-was just a tiny white scar where the burn had been. It looked like I
-had done it at least a couple of weeks ago!</p>
-
-<p>Yogi and the Captain looked at each other and grinned like they were
-real proud of something.</p>
-
-<p>"That's part of the lesson, Tuck. Our big discovery is that the
-increased radioactivity of the elements here on Lunette seems to have
-a miraculous healing power on any infectious or communicable disease,
-and on any injury to body tissues. Maybe you remember reading a little
-about the strange effect that the Bikini tests had on some of the
-animals used experimentally."</p>
-
-<p>I nodded.</p>
-
-<p>Yogi continued. "We don't know yet just how this radioactivity works on
-the body. In fact, we're not even sure it is the radioactivity alone.
-There may be some added effect from the Lunette climate or water. But
-we have proved, to the satisfaction of everyone here, that almost all
-Earth diseases and most injuries can be cured on Lunette.</p>
-
-<p>"The mess sergeant had a trick knee when he came here. The trouble
-disappeared completely when we arrived. One of the geologists had an
-ulcer. Hasn't felt a pain since the second day. Another guy had some
-bad powder burns from a lab experiment that disappeared over night,
-just like your burn did.</p>
-
-<p>"When we first suspected what was going on, we asked the crew at Silver
-Spring to send up white rats, guinea pigs, and dogs, with everything
-from cancer and T.B. through rabies to polio, and the results were one
-hundred per cent perfect, with complete recovery in every case inside
-of a week. <i>And</i>, this is important, they stayed cured when sent back
-to Earth."</p>
-
-<p>Yogi's eyes were burning like one of them gospel preachers at a
-revival, and his voice was shaking. I was catching the excitement
-myself. The Captain took over the story.</p>
-
-<p>"I suppose you're wondering what we want of you?"</p>
-
-<p>"I sure am. This is a big deal, isn't it?" I looked at the little scar
-on my hand again, to convince myself nobody was kidding.</p>
-
-<p>"Here's our problem, and our plan, Tuck. Yogi told me what you said
-about the taxpayers' right to know where their money is going, and it
-ties in with what a lot of us up here have been discussing.</p>
-
-<p>"Most of our fellows are like Yogi&mdash;technicians who chose their line
-of work because they thought they could help make the world a better
-place to live in. Now that they have the chance to make the biggest
-contribution of their whole lives, they're all hemmed in by military
-rigamarole and red tape. It goes against the grain for scientists."</p>
-
-<p>"You mean the Army is keeping the place top secret, so it can't be used
-for a ... well, a health resort?"</p>
-
-<p>The Captain nodded. "I'm not arguing with the military reasons for
-security. Maybe they're right on that score. But in the meantime,
-thousands of people are dying every day of disease, needlessly, while
-the Army keeps the secret that could end those deaths. The people
-will find out about it eventually, and I don't think they'll like it.
-Suppose your mother were to die of cancer a few months from now, and
-you were to find out later that her death was unnecessary, and that
-your own government could have stopped it. What would you think? How
-about it, Peters, are you with us? What do you say?"</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>The Captain had been talking louder and faster till he was practically
-out of breath.</p>
-
-<p>"I got just one thing to say, Captain. My baby sister died of T.B.
-just before her eighteenth birthday last year. You can bet your bottom
-nickel I'm with you on this deal, right down the line. Just give me the
-scoop. I'll go along."</p>
-
-<p>Yogi and the CO slapped me on the back.</p>
-
-<p>They explained to me, Mr. President, all about this secret
-Congressional hearing to be held on the Lunette project next week, and
-how I should go to Washington and get my Congressman to spring me as a
-surprise witness&mdash;a civilian who had been to Lunette and knew the score.</p>
-
-<p>They knew all about what strings to pull to be sure I could get in,
-and they helped me figure out what I should say. They seemed to think
-that my word, you know, the guy on the street or something like that,
-would carry some weight and make Congress see that the health angle on
-this Lunette project is a darned sight more important than keeping the
-secret of a guided missile station. Why, for Pete's sake, Mr. President
-Uncle Sam owns Lunette, doesn't he? When the other side hears about
-this they'll want to get in on it so bad they'll be awful anxious
-to stay in our good graces. Probably turn out to be an even better
-military defense than guided missiles.</p>
-
-<p>Time was important now, so just at five o'clock, when I generally
-report for work, Yogi and I walked down to the Matter BARS and shook
-hands. Yogi took a polaroid picture of me standing there and gave me
-the print. You know, Mr. President, I kind of hated to leave. That
-Lunette sure is a pretty place.</p>
-
-<p>Yogi moved the two little balls together, and sure enough, like he had
-told me, I felt like I was catching a fit of sneezing. That was all,
-and there I was back at Diversified, in the restricted Signal Corps
-section, with the inspector staring at me.</p>
-
-<p>He looks ready to pull a gun on me, so I laugh at him, nervous as
-heck inside but trying not to show it. "What's the matter, you seen a
-ghost?"</p>
-
-<p>"How did you get in that cabinet, Peters?" He's really mad, and I'm
-wondering if I can pull it off.</p>
-
-<p>"Well, I know you spend all your time over here by yourself, so I
-thought maybe someone should break the monotony. I just crawled in
-there a couple of minutes ago to surprise you." (That was true in a
-way, wasn't it?)</p>
-
-<p>"Don't do that again, Peters. No harm done, I guess, but if I had moved
-those two little balls together without seeing you in there I don't
-know what would have happened to you!"</p>
-
-<p>Mebbe you don't, but I do, I thought to myself. I scrammed out of there
-as soon as I was sure I had him sold on my story.</p>
-
-<p>And that's all there is to the story, Mr. President, except that last
-week like a darned fool I had to drop that picture. It was one Yogi
-took of me with his Polaroid, standing by the Matter BARS with a bunch
-of Lunette coconuts (the boys call them Ikenuts, sir).</p>
-
-<p>So my foreman sees the manhole cover in the picture and thinks that
-something must be funny and turns it in to our personnel manager. And
-<i>he</i> turns it over to the FBI, and I wouldn't tell em anything, and
-here I am in the clink.</p>
-
-<p>So it looks like I've fouled up the boys' plans to use me as a secret
-weapon, and it looks like I've fouled up my own life real good unless
-you can figure out a way to help me.</p>
-
-<p>I think I will close now and leave the whole mess up to you.</p>
-
-<p class="ph1">Obediently yours,<br />
-Joe Peters.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>THE WHITE HOUSE<br />
-Washington, D. C.</p>
-
-<p>Dear Mr. Peters:</p>
-
-<p>We are happy to learn that, in accordance with instructions from this
-office, you have been reinstated in your job and that the FBI and your
-employer are reassured as to your loyalty.</p>
-
-<p>The President has asked me to extend his personal invitation to you to
-have lunch at the White House next Friday when you are in Washington
-for the hearing.</p>
-
-<p>Your story interested him so much that he investigated it personally
-and thoroughly. As a result he has a special surprise in store for
-Congress and the American people on Friday. All I can divulge to you at
-this time is that his barber fainted this morning when he called at the
-White House to give the President his weekly trim.</p>
-
-<p class="ph1">Very truly yours,<br />
-Robert Kenwood<br />
-Special Assistant to the<br />
-President of the United States</p>
-
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