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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d7b82bc --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,4 @@ +*.txt text eol=lf +*.htm text eol=lf +*.html text eol=lf +*.md text eol=lf diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..637c809 --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #65755 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/65755) diff --git a/old/65755-0.txt b/old/65755-0.txt deleted file mode 100644 index faadbbd..0000000 --- a/old/65755-0.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,5679 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg eBook of Jill, by E. A. Dillwyn - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and -most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms -of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you -will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before -using this eBook. - -Title: Jill - Vol. I (of 2) - -Author: E. A. Dillwyn - -Release Date: July 3, 2021 [eBook #65755] - -Language: English - -Produced by: anonymous Project Gutenberg volunteers - -*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK JILL *** - - - - - - JILL - - - BY - - E. A. DILLWYN - - - IN TWO VOLUMES.--VOL. I. - - - London - MACMILLAN AND CO. - 1884 - - _All rights reserved._ - - - - - _Printed by_ R. & R. CLARK, _Edinburgh._ - - - - - CONTENTS. - - - CHAPTER I. - PAGE -JILL INTRODUCES HERSELF . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1 - - CHAPTER II. - -FOREIGN TRAVEL. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16 - - CHAPTER III. - -A WIDOW'S MANŒUVRES . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29 - - CHAPTER IV. - -A TIGHT CURB. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38 - - CHAPTER V. - -BREAKING LOOSE. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54 - - CHAPTER VI. - -A PHOTOGRAPH. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 71 - - CHAPTER VII. - -A FEW LONDON PRICES . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 86 - - CHAPTER VIII. - -A STREET INCIDENT . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 104 - - CHAPTER IX. - -A NERVOUS LADY. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 113 - - CHAPTER X. - -CHANGE OF SITUATION . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 129 - - CHAPTER XI. - -AN UNWELCOME ADMIRER. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 147 - - CHAPTER XII. - -THE PHOTOGRAPH AGAIN. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 166 - - CHAPTER XIII. - -LORD CLEMENT. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 178 - - CHAPTER XIV. - -AT AJACCIO. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 194 - - CHAPTER XV. - -A DRIVING EXPEDITION THROUGH CORSICA. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 205 - - CHAPTER XVI. - -ESCAPED PENITENCIERS. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 221 - - - - - CHAPTER I. - - JILL INTRODUCES HERSELF. - - -I have heard people say that men are more apt to be of an adventurous -disposition than women, but that is an opinion from which I differ. I -suppose it has arisen because timidity and sensitiveness are hostile -to the spirit of enterprise, checking its growth and development, -and not unfrequently proving altogether fatal to it; and as these -qualities are especially characteristic of the weaker sex, it follows -naturally that noted female adventurers are less common than male -ones. But that seems only to show that an unfavourable soil has -caused the plant to become blighted or smothered, and is no conclusive -proof that the seed was never sown. It is my belief that the aforesaid -spirit is distributed by nature impartially throughout the human race, -and that she implants it as freely in the breast of the female as in -that of the male. Once let it be implanted, and let it have fair -play, untrammelled by nervous, hesitating, shrinking, home-clinging -tendencies, and it will infallibly lead its possessor to some bold -departure from the everyday routine of existence that satisfies -mortals of a more hum-drum temperament. A craving for continual -change and excitement is a thing that is sure to assert itself -vigorously and insist on being gratified, provided its possessor -has also plenty of health and courage, and is unrestrained by the -fetters formed from strong domestic attachments or other affection. -Of people thus positively and negatively endowed it may be confidently -predicted--whether their gender be masculine or feminine--that -adventures will bestrew their road plentifully, meeting them at every -turn, and seeming to seek them out and be attracted to them even as -flies unto honey. I am myself an instance of this, as I can see -plainly enough in reviewing my past career. At an earlier period I -was less clear-sighted, and failed to perceive the restless spirit -that had taken possession of me and become the constraining power -of my life; but the lapse of a few years is a wonderful aid to -discerning the true motives of former actions, and reminds me in this -way of the dark blue spectacles which the man in charge of a smelting -furnace puts on when he wants to see what is going on in his furnace. -Without them he can distinguish nothing in the fiery interior; but -the spectacles have the effect of softening the fierce, blinding -glare, rendering visible what was before invisible, and enabling him -to watch the progress of the red-hot seething masses of ore and metal -undergoing fusion and transmutation under his care. And in like manner -does intervening time clear the vision towards events, so that it -is possible to estimate them far more justly some while after they -have taken place, than it was at the moment of their occurrence. A -retrospect, therefore, gives me a more correct notion of myself than -I had before. I see how often, when I imagined myself to be solely -impelled by some purely external circumstance, I was, in reality, -also obeying the dictates of a longing for adventure and impatience -of sameness, which have always had a very strong influence in -determining my conduct. I detect how love of variety manifested -itself as the principal cause of my actions, and made my course -deviate widely from that of other ladies in my rank of life, and -furnishes a reasonable explanation for behaviour which would else -seem unaccountable. To a person of this disposition, monotony, -dullness, and boredom in every shape are of course absolutely -intolerable; consequently I do not believe that any position -involving these drawbacks will ever content me for long, even -though it may, in other respects, afford every advantage that the -heart of man (or woman) can desire. And having supplied the reader -with this much clue to a comprehension of the character of the -individual whose story lies before him, I leave all further judgment -upon me to be pronounced according to what is found in the pages of -this veracious history, wherein I purpose faithfully to depict -myself exactly as I appear in my own eyes, and as my life shows -me to be. - -A person's identity is materially affected (as regards both himself -and others) by that of the immediate ancestors without whom he or -she would not have existed at all; so the first step towards my -self-introduction must obviously be to state my parentage. - -My father, Sir Anthony Trecastle, a gentleman of small fortune -serving in the Life Guards, was employed in London discharging the -not very onerous duties expected from an officer of Heavies in time -of peace, when he became acquainted and enamoured with a daughter of -Lord Gilbert's. Sir Anthony's means were not sufficiently large for -him to be reckoned anything of a matrimonial catch in that set of -society to which both he and the young lady he admired belonged. He -had enough to live upon, however, besides being a tenth baronet, -rather good-looking, and the representative of a family whose name -was to be found in the Domesday Book; therefore her relations and -friends considered him to be a respectable though not brilliant -match, made no attempt to interfere either for or against his suit, -and left her perfectly free to please herself as to the answer it -should receive. It was long before she could make up her mind in the -matter; but, after considering it for more than a year, she at last -determined to accept him. What may have moved her to do this of -course I cannot say; but all I know of her character makes me think -it more likely for the decision to have resulted from a reasonable -and deliberate consideration of matrimonial pros and cons than from -any love for her husband. Those who knew her well believed her to be -so singularly cold and indifferent as never to have warmed into real -love for any living creature during her whole life. And not only do -my own recollections of her corroborate this opinion, but also I may -say that I myself am a living argument to prove it true, inasmuch as -I, too, am unusually exempt from the affectionate, tender emotions -to which most men and women are liable; and it seems reasonable to -suppose that this extraordinary cold-heartedness of mine must have -been inherited from her. - -I am sure it is an inheritance for which I have had much reason to be -thankful; for I have no doubt it has saved me from many a folly that -I should otherwise have committed. A warm-hearted, soft, affectionate -disposition is a possession which I have never coveted. It has -generally seemed to me to be a cause of weakness rather than of -strength to its owner; and besides, it is very apt to hinder and -stunt the development of that source of delight--the spirit of -enterprise. - -This, however, is somewhat of a digression, as the extent to which -my mother may have cared for my father does not much concern this -narrative; at any rate she liked him sufficiently well to marry him, -and that is all with which we need trouble ourselves here. He sold -out of the army soon afterwards, and took his bride to reside at -Castle Manor, as his country place was called; there I, their only -child, was born. Had I been a boy it was intended to call me Gilbert, -in honour of my maternal grandfather's title; as, however, I was a -girl, and as my parents still wished to adhere as far as possible -to their original intention of naming their first-born after the -Gilbert peerage, the name was adapted to my sex by the addition of -three letters, and thus I received at my christening the somewhat -uncouth appellation of Gilbertina. As this was obviously too much of -a mouthful to be convenient for common domestic use, an abbreviation -was inevitable, and the first one bestowed upon me was Jill. But this -did not find favour with my mother. She declared it was ugly, and -objectionably suggestive of low, republican ideas, such as carrying -pails of water, rough tumbles, and cracked crowns; therefore Jill was -condemned and Ina substituted, as a more graceful and aristocratic -manner of shortening my name. - -Though I allude to this small matter, because Jill was the name to -which I afterwards returned, yet I do not purpose to dwell long upon -the history of my life up to the age of eighteen, at which period I -launched out boldly upon an independent career. Still, however, the -earlier stages cannot be left altogether unnoticed, as the events -which took place then naturally have a bearing upon subsequent ones, -and also may be thought interesting for the part they probably played -in the moulding of my character. - -Was I born destitute of the ordinary instincts of filial affection--in -which case, be it observed, that it would be most unjust to blame me -for what was simply a natural deficiency? Or is the fault of my -defect in that way to be charged to my parents for having done -nothing to develop the above-mentioned instinct? Anyhow, whatever -the cause may have been, certain it is that they and I were mutually -indifferent, and never saw more of one another than we could possibly -help. They went their way, and I went mine, and the less we came in -contact the better was I pleased. I regarded my mother as a sort of -stranger whom the accident of inhabiting the same house caused me to -see oftener than any other stranger, and who had an authority over me -and my affairs which was decidedly irksome, because our opinions as -to what it was right and fitting that I should do or not do were -always at variance with one another. She disliked untidiness, -whereas I revelled in being in a mess. Consequently she aggravated -me continually by insisting on my going off to wash my face and hands -or have my clothes put tidy, when I thought they did very well as -they were, and would have preferred staying where I was. Again, -mud-larking, and many other of my favourite occupations which -brought about a torn and dirty state of garments, were strictly -forbidden by her, to my great annoyance. Imagining the restriction -to be imposed solely in the interests of my clothes, I well remember -how rejoiced I was one day when I thought I had hit upon a plan for -enjoying myself after my own fashion without offending against her -code, and how disappointed I was when my scheme proved a failure. I -was about ten years old at the time, and was standing at the edge of -a small stream, longing with my whole heart to go and paddle about in -it, when it suddenly struck me that, as the edict against mud-larking -and similar amusements was grounded upon the harm they did to my -apparel, there could certainly be no objection to them provided -nothing suffered except my own skin--that being an article which -was surely of no consequence to any one but myself. Inspired by -this brilliant idea, I immediately took off my shoes, stockings, -gloves, and drawers, turned my sleeves back to the shoulder, wound -my petticoats round my waist, and plunged into the stream; there I -waded about with the utmost satisfaction, constructing mud-docks and -sailing bark-boats without in the least minding the cuts and bruises -inflicted on my bare feet by stones, or the numerous scratches which -my unprotected arms and legs received from overhanging bushes and -brambles. What did that matter when I was having such a glorious -mud-lark? And I enjoyed the fun all the more because I believed -fondly that I had a prospect of plenty more of the same kind in the -future, now that I had so cleverly discovered the way to get over the -objection that had hitherto interfered with it. It must be clearly -impossible for any one to find fault with a proceeding which exposed -nothing but my own flesh to risks of rents and dirt. - -Alas! however, I was destined speedily to be undeceived. My mother, -hearing how I had been engaged, gave me a tremendous scolding, -declaring that she was quite shocked at me, and that if ever I -did such a thing again I should be punished. For my part, I was -perfectly amazed at this indignation, which seemed to me totally -unreasonable, as I could not imagine what harm I had done. And the -incident, like all others connected with her, strengthened the sulky -injured feeling I had of being always wrong in her eyes. No matter -what I might wish to do, she would forbid it, I thought. - -I do not know that she was wilfully unkind to me, perhaps; but she -certainly never was actively kind; and she stands out in my memory as -a cold hard figure with which I could not come in contact without -finding myself thwarted in some way or other, and being deprived of -some pleasure. "Don't do that!" is a sentence odious in childish -ears; and as that was the sentence that I heard oftener than any -other from her lips, I naturally got into the habit of avoiding her -company as much as possible--which was all the easier to manage -because she had as little wish for my society as I had for hers, and -only endured me with her at all, I think, out of regard to the -_convenances_ of English life. Never once do I remember her to have -taken the trouble to supply me with any pleasures which she approved -of to replace those which she prohibited; nor did she ever bestow -upon me presents, indulgences, or marks of affection. Though she -never attempted to teach me anything herself, yet she had me do -lessons, and insisted on my learning needlework, which was my -especial aversion; and I knew she was the source for the tasks I -hated, even though she did not personally impose them on me. - -Such being the terms on which she and I stood to one another, is it -to be wondered at that I should have feared and disliked her? - -I was about twelve years old when she died. As I had by that time -read with great interest a large number of juvenile story-books of -the exaggerated sentimental and goody kind, I was thoroughly well -up in the behaviour to be expected from any girl-heroine on the -occurrence of such an event. I knew that her father would at once -become the great object of her life, and that she would devote -herself utterly to the task of comforting him and endeavouring to -replace Her (with a capital H) who was gone. Though the girl would -of course be herself well-nigh crushed with grief, and indulge in -paroxysms of sobs and tears whenever she was alone, yet she would -heroically repress any public manifestation of distress, lest the -knowledge and sight of it should increase that of her surviving -parent. Her zeal on his behalf would know no bounds, and lead her -to neglect the most ordinary precautions against illness for -herself. This would appear in some absurd and wholly uncalled for -act of self-devotion--such as sitting motionless for hours in a -thorough draught and wet through, lest the sound of her moving -might awake him as he slept in the next room, or something equally -ridiculous; and by a few insane performances of the same kind the way -would easily be paved for the invariably thrilling climax. A pillow -bedewed nightly with tears; knife-like stabs of pain returning with -increasing frequency; blood-spitting neglected and kept secret; pangs -mental and bodily, concealed under a cheerful exterior; there could -be but one conclusion to such symptoms as these. The overtaxed -strength would collapse suddenly; consumption, decline, heart -disease, or some other alarming illness, would ensue; and then there -would be either a few harrowing deathbed scenes, or else a miraculous -recovery and happy marriage of the heroine; in this last case her -spouse would of course be some paragon young man, who should be in -every respect ideally perfect, and thoroughly able to appreciate and -do justice to the treasure whom he had been so fortunate as to win -for a wife. - -So invariably did this style of thing take place whenever the heroine -lost her mother in the books which I had devoured greedily without -perceiving how morbid and exaggerated they were, and without doubting -their being faithful representations of human nature, that I had a -sort of hazy impression of its being the inevitable accompaniment -of that loss, whatever might have been the terms hitherto existing -between the parties concerned. The folly of supposing that I could -feel deep regret for a person whom I had always avoided as much as -possible never occurred to me, and I was disposed to believe that -what was described in the stories was an indispensable sequence of -events that came after one another as naturally as spring follows -winter, and summer follows spring. In that case, I too, must expect -to undergo the regular course of emotions like every one else. It -would be a decidedly novel and mysterious experience, and one that -I was by no means sure would be pleasant, and I looked out anxiously -for the first indications of its approach as though it had been -some kind of sickness with which I was threatened. A gush of poignant -grief for my mother, an intense yearning over and pity for my father, -sleepless nights and untasted meals, were, I knew, the correct -preliminaries to the state of affairs that I was anticipating. Two -or three days passed, however, and I found to my surprise that I had -still no inability to sleep and eat as usual; no alteration in my -former feelings about my parents, either living or deceased; nor any -other reason to think I was about to behave in the same manner as -those sentimental young ladies about whom I had read. Then I became -perplexed as to the cause of this difference between me and them. -I had taken it for granted that the stories showed exactly how -human beings in general thought, felt, and acted; but how came it -then that I, who was unquestionably a human being, should find my -own experience of a great occasion of this kind so different from -what the books depicted? The only way of accounting for it was by -supposing either that they were not as true to nature as I -had believed, or else that I must be unlike the rest of my -fellow-creatures; and as it did not at all please me to consider -myself an abnormal variety of the human species, I adopted the former -theory as the probable explanation of what puzzled me. No one, -thought I, ever dreams of judging fairy-tales by the standard of -real life; and no doubt those stories that I fancied were true are -in reality only fairy-tales in disguise. The characters are not real -men and women, but only make-believe ones; and they are really just -as impossible as if they were called ogres, gnomes, elves, magicians, -or something of that kind. - -It was a relief to me to arrive at this conclusion, and realise that -there was no likelihood of my following in the steps of the -afore-mentioned fictitious damsels, for, however attractive their -experiences might be to read about, I had had very considerable -misgivings as to whether I should find them equally pleasant to -undergo in my own person. I may add that I am sure my incapacity -for imitating them was a most fortunate circumstance for my father; -he would, I am convinced, have been at his wits ends to know what -to do with a daughter of the story-book stamp, and would have been -unutterably taken aback and annoyed at any hysterical demonstrations -of devotion or attachment on my part. - - - - - CHAPTER II. - - FOREIGN TRAVEL. - - -It is time to say a few words as to what my father was like. -Intensely selfish, and hating trouble, he was also extremely -sociable, jovially disposed, easily amused, and endowed with an -enviable facility for shaking off whatever was disagreeable. He -seemed to consider everything unpleasant, dull, sad, or gloomy, as -a sort of poisonous external application which must be got rid of -promptly, lest it should get absorbed into the system. Consequently -he never allowed anything to make a deeper impression on him than -he could help. And in order to escape at once from the depressing -influences of his wife's death he resolved to go abroad immediately -after the funeral, and stay away for a good long time, wandering from -place to place where his fancy took him, so as to distract his mind -from all possibility of melancholy by a complete change of scene and -life. - -As he did not see the use of keeping up an establishment in England -during his absence, he determined to let Castle Manor. Then came the -question of what was to be done with me under these circumstances? -His relations assured him that the best plan would be to send me to -school somewhere till he should again be settled in his own home. -After reflecting for a day on this suggestion, he considerably -astonished those who had made it by announcing that he meant to take -me abroad with him. Such a determination was certainly surprising on -the part of one who could not endure trouble, and had no affection -for me. But the fact was that since his marriage he had got so much -accustomed to the feeling that there was some one belonging to him -always within reach, that he did not now like to live quite alone -again; and therefore he thought he might as well have me handy as a -last resource to fall back upon for company when none other should be -attainable. Wherever he went, therefore, there I went also; and for -that reason we were supposed by many people to be wholly wrapped up -in one another, and a touching example of parental and filial -attachment. I accidentally overheard some remarks to that effect made -one day by a couple of compatriots staying at the same hotel as -ourselves at Naples; and, child as I was, I remember that I laughed -cynically to think how wide of the truth they were, and what fools -people were to be so ready to judge from appearances. For though he -chose to have me living under the same roof as himself, yet he never -had any wish for my society if he could pick up any one else to talk -to, and walk, ride, drive, or make expeditions with; and as his -sociability and geniality made it easy to him to make acquaintance -and fraternise with strangers, he was not often dependent upon me -for companionship; so that I was left very much to myself, and -spent the greater part of the time in solitude, or with my attendant -who was a sort of cross between nursery-governess and maid. - -We moved about from place to place for two or three years, rarely -staying long anywhere, and not once returning to England. This roving -existence had a great charm for me, notwithstanding its frequent -loneliness, and was infinitely more to my taste than would have been -the orthodox schoolroom routine that falls to the lot of most girls -between the ages of twelve and fifteen. Doubtless, too, it had a -good deal of influence on the formation of my character; for the -perpetual motion and change of scene in which I delighted could -hardly fail to foster my inborn restlessness and love of adventure, -as well as to develop whatever natural tendencies I possessed towards -self-reliance, independence, and intolerance of restraint. - -Meanwhile my education, as may be supposed, pursued a somewhat -erratic course, and my standard of attainments would, I fear, have -by no means been considered satisfactory by Mrs. Grundy. A life -passed in hotels, _pensions_, and lodgings is unfavourable to regular -studies; and, besides that, there was no one, after my mother's -death, who cared sufficiently about my intellectual or moral progress -to take the trouble of insisting on lessons being persevered with, -whether I liked them or not. Consequently I learnt anything that took -my fancy, and left alone everything else. On some out-of-the-way -subjects I was better informed than the majority of my contemporaries; -but then, on the other hand, I was ignorant of much that every -schoolgirl is expected to know. My ideas, for instance, as to -religious matters were extremely vague. I was but slightly acquainted -with the contents of either the Bible or Prayer Book; never thought -of religion as a thing with which I, personally, had to do; had not -a notion of what constituted the differences between one form of -religious belief and another; and never attended any place of worship -except when some grand function was to come off. All I cared for in -such a place was to listen to the music, and stare at the lights, -vestments, decorations, ceremonial, and crowd; therefore I only went -on great festivals, or when some especially prized relic was to be -exhibited, or other unusual attraction offered; and, of course, I -became more familiar with the interior of Roman Catholic churches -and chapels than any other. - -What accomplishments I possessed were such as would have qualified -me well enough for a courier, and I think that I could have earned -my livelihood in that line of business without much difficulty after -I had been abroad for a while. I could speak several languages -fluently, besides having a smattering of a few more, and of two or -three _patois_; I was well up in the relative values of foreign -coins, and capable of making a bargain even with such slippery -individuals as drivers, jobmasters, _laquais-de-place_, or boatmen. -Besides that, I was so thoroughly at home in railway stations that I -could find my way about in any hitherto-unvisited one almost by -instinct; I could usually tell, to within a few minutes, the exact -time when any _rapide_ or _grande-vitesse_ was due to start from -Paris for Spain, Germany, Italy, or the Mediterranean; when it ought -to reach its destination; and at about what hour it would be at the -more important towns on its route; and I had quite mastered the -intricacies of the _English and Foreign Bradshaw_, _Livret-Chaix_, -and works of a similarly perplexing kind, so as to be able to -discover easily whatever information they could afford. My expertness -in this way was chiefly owing to a happy thought that came into my -head at Bayonne one day when I happened to be left alone for the -afternoon with nothing to do, and no book whatever available except -a railway guide. The prospect till night was not an exhilarating one, -and I was disconsolately wondering how to get through the time, when -it suddenly occurred to me that I would play at being about to start -for St. Petersburg, or some other remote place, and obliged to look -out the best and fastest way of getting there. I set to work -accordingly with the railway guide, and became so engrossed in the -game I had invented that I forgot all about the passage of time, and -was quite astonished to find how quickly the afternoon slipped away -whilst I was settling various journeys to my satisfaction. Such an -easily-attainable means of amusement was a glorious discovery to me, -and one which I commend to the notice of other travellers as a -resource for wet weather and dull moments. Henceforth I had no dread -of lacking amusement, provided I had a time-table; and many a long -hour have I beguiled in planning skeleton tours to all kinds of -places--poring over the times of arrival and departure of trains, -diligences, steamers, and other public conveyances, and weighing in -my own mind the prices and comparative merits of various routes with -every bit as much care and attention as though the imaginary journey -under consideration were a reality, and I were the sole person -responsible to make arrangements for it. This employment had for me -something of the same sort of fascination that working out a problem -in algebra has for some people--indeed I do not think the two things -are greatly unlike each other in their natures. - -Besides the accomplishments I have mentioned, I had also some ideas -as to foreign cookery, which I picked up here and there on our -travels--chiefly on the rare occasions when we were in lodgings -anywhere. I do not think I ever met any mistress of a lodging-house -abroad who did not pride herself particularly upon her cooking of -some one dish (sometimes more than that, but at least one), and who -was not willing to initiate into its mysteries any lodger who evinced -a proper appreciation of its excellence. There was an old woman at -Genoa, I remember, at whose house we stayed for some weeks, who knew -several delicious ways of dressing macaroni and vegetables, and who -not only allowed me to watch her whilst she cooked, and gave me her -favourite recipes, but even stretched her good nature so far as to -let me try my own hand in the kitchen till I could join practice to -theory, and produce a tolerably successful result for my labours. She -was a kindly, motherly old soul, who was impressed with the notion -that there was something peculiarly forlorn and provocative of pity -in my condition; she generally called me _poverina_ (to my amusement), -and took me under her protection from an early stage of our -acquaintance. - -"See, _Signorina_," she said to me on the second morning of our -occupying her apartments, "you will no doubt wish to buy velvet -here--as all the English do--and many other things also. But be -guided by me, and go not to buy alone, or you will most certainly be -cheated. No! when you see the thing that you desire, come to me--take -me to where it is--point it out to me quietly. Then will I go forward -as though to buy it for myself, and so shall you procure it at a -reasonable price. You who understand not the modes of our merchants, -would pay nearly, or perhaps even altogether--for there is no saying -how far the folly of an English person may go!--the amount that they -demand for their goods. But as for me!--ah! _I_ know how to arrange -these people, and you shall see what I will do! I dare to flatter -myself that there is not a man or woman in the whole of Genoa who -can get the better of me in a bargain!" - -Experience soon showed me that this was no idle vaunt. Though--to her -great disappointment--I declined to buy any velvet, yet I gladly -availed myself of her services for other purchases, and never in my -life, either before or since, have I met with any one who was her match -in bargaining. She never bought anything at a shop or stall without -having taken a final farewell and departed from it at least twice, -and then suffered herself to be brought back by the persuasions of -the owner; I think she regarded this going away and returning as -quite a necessary part of the negotiation, without which it could not -possibly come to a proper conclusion. At all events her efforts were -invariably successful, and she forced shopkeepers, market-people, -and sellers of every sort with whom she had dealings, to accept -reductions of price which seemed to me almost incredible. Meanwhile -I, in whose behalf she was exerting herself, used merely to assist -as a passive spectator, feeling that my knowledge of mankind was -being enlarged, and that I was gaining a valuable insight into the -amount of dishonesty and cunning that was latent in human beings in -general, and Italians in particular. This was especially my feeling -when, as more than once happened, I perceived that my friend herself -was not altogether exempt from the failings of her country-people; -and that, relying on my knowledge of Italian being less than it -really was, she was making a little profit at my expense out of the -transaction she was conducting for me. This was a fresh revelation -of the depravity of human nature, and impressed upon my youthful mind -the folly of trusting absolutely to any professions of friendship, -however genuine they might appear. But, after all, it was not to be -expected that she would take a great deal of trouble for a stranger -gratuitously and out of pure love; besides that, she allowed no one -except herself to cheat me, so that in the end my pocket was saved, -notwithstanding the commissions that she managed adroitly to retain -for her own benefit; and as, furthermore, I derived much instruction -from her in the art of bargaining, I saw that on the whole I was a -gainer by her help, and had nothing to complain of. So I let her act -for me as before, chuckling inwardly at her vehement denunciations -of the roguery that surrounded us, and not telling her of what I had -discovered regarding her own. - -I remember but little of most of the innumerable people with whom my -father was continually making acquaintance; they seemed to me to come -and go in endless succession, having to do with us only for a few -days or hours, and then vanishing into space, with about as much -likelihood of our ever seeing them again as though we had all been so -many dead leaves whirled away by gales from opposite directions. But -there was one of these stray acquaintances who made more impression -on me than the rest, and whom I mention here because of the relations -which she and I were destined to have together in the future--little -as we then suspected it. - -Kitty Mervyn, the individual in question, was a girl of about a year -older than myself, clever, vivacious, and agreeable, and promising to -be very good-looking by the time she should be seventeen. She and I -were cousins in some far-off degree, because her father, Lord Mervyn, -was a cousin many times removed of my grandfather, Lord Gilbert. The -cousinship, however, was so remote that we did not know of each -other's existence; and my father and the Mervyns had never happened -to meet until they arrived one evening at the hotel at which we -were staying at Lugano. Then the distant connection served as an -introduction between us; and as the next day was a dreary wet Sunday, -the feeling of ennui and desire to kill time that was common to us -all, led to our seeing more of one another than we should probably -have done otherwise. Kitty and I paired off together naturally, as -being nearly of the same age. As far as I can recollect, we spent -most of the day in watching and laughing at the performances of -some embryo bicyclists, who were too enthusiastic to be deterred -by either rain or frequent tumbles, and who went on grinding -perseveringly on their bicycles up and down a bit of road in sight -of our windows which was their practice-ground. We did not find it -very lively, certainly; but then there was nothing else to do, unless -we had struck up a romantic friendship and exchanged sentimental -confidences--as some girls thus situated would have done--and -neither she nor I were at all disposed for that sort of thing. Our -intercourse lasted only for that one day, as next morning the Mervyns -departed south, whilst we went to Como. But in the short time I had -been with Kitty she had somehow made a stronger impression than usual -on my unimpressionable mind, and the recollection of her lingered in -my memory longer than that of any one else whom we met. Her good -looks attracted me; her cleverness and liveliness made her very good -company. Notwithstanding an incipient haughtiness about her, which -might develop as she grew older, perhaps, she seemed at present -to have a decided capacity for being what I called jolly; and, -altogether, she had given me the idea of being remarkably likeable. I -was sorry that the chances of travel made us separate so soon, and -wondered if she was at all inclined to return the liking which I had -taken to her. But she passed out of my head after a while; and it was -only now and then that I recollected her existence, and thought how -pleasant it would be if we happened to meet again some day. - - - - - CHAPTER III. - - A WIDOW'S MANŒUVRES. - - -The life of travelling companion to my father being very much to my -taste, I was naturally disgusted at its coming to a conclusion. This -happened when I was about fifteen, and was caused by an event to -which I objected strongly, and which was destined to have a most -important effect on my subsequent existence. - -We were making a tour through Holland and Friesland, and, when at -Amsterdam, happened to make acquaintance with a Mrs. Grove, a widow, -accompanied by two daughters, who were respectively two and three -years older than me. I did not take to her at all, and thought she -seemed a flattering, lying, pushing, cringing, vulgar individual; but -having carelessly thought that much of her, I dismissed her from my -mind as a person with whom I had nothing to do, and whose character -was quite immaterial to me--little thinking what a _bête noire_ -she was to prove to me afterwards! - -She was on the look-out for a successor for the deceased Mr. Grove; -and as my father appeared to her to be a very suitable person for the -vacancy, she began at once to lay siege to his affections. She did -not, however, wish to show her hand too plainly at first, by attaching -herself to us so openly as to make it obvious that she meant to pursue -us from place to place. Therefore, the plan she adopted was, to -discover, by apparently careless questioning, whither Sir Anthony's -wayward fancy was likely to take him next; having done this, she would -direct her own course to the same district, go to some principal -town in it which we should be pretty sure to visit sooner or later, -wait for us there, and then pretend to be greatly surprised when we -arrived, and to consider the meeting a purely accidental one. For -instance, my father intended to go from Friesland to Münster, which he -considered would be good headquarters whence to go to the neighbouring -town of Soest, where he wanted to see the _Wiesen Kirche_, and other -specimens of Gothic architecture. He had spoken of this in Mrs. Grove's -presence, so that she was quite aware of his intentions in the matter. -Consequently there occurred what she called a curious coincidence, -as she also was moved by the self-same thirst for archaeological -studies at that particular time; and thus when we reached Münster from -Winschoten, we found her already installed in the former city before -us. At Cassel and at Frankfort did we again fall in with her; and on -the very first night of our being at Heidelberg she and her daughters -joined us under the walls of the old castle, as we sauntered about in -the dark and admired the brilliant fireflies. - -Sir Anthony was too much a man of the world to ascribe these -perpetually recurring meetings entirely to chance, and soon began to -have a shrewd suspicion of the widow's intentions. Then he took to -amusing himself with her, withholding information as to his movements -when she cross-questioned him about them, putting her on a wrong -scent, and otherwise baffling her curiosity. Once or twice he joked -about the matter with me (towards whom she affected extreme -friendliness), and asked me whether I thought she wanted him as a -match for herself or for one of the daughters? This behaviour of his -calmed the state of perturbation into which I had been previously -thrown; for I was most indignant at the notion of her wanting to -marry him, and was in a terrible fright lest she should succeed. For -one thing the mere idea of a stepmother was repugnant to me--be she -who she might; and besides that, I had not the slightest confidence -in the sincerity of Mrs. Grove's demonstrations of affection for me, -which were, I felt sure, only assumed in order to ingratiate herself -with my father; for I saw that she--like every one else--was misled -by appearances, and took it for granted that a man who insisted on -taking his daughter with him wherever he went, must be so devoted to -her as to be certain to entertain kindly feelings towards any one who -should appear fond of her. But my anxiety was relieved when I found -that he was by no means blind to her designs, and was quite ready to -laugh at them openly, and to take a mischievous pleasure in teasing -her. That reassured me, and made me feel satisfied that her labours -were in vain, and that I had nothing to apprehend from them. - -This easy tranquillisation of my fears just showed my youth and -inexperience. Had I been somewhat older I should have known what -irresistible power over men almost all widows possess--which is the -natural result of the insight into man's nature that they have -acquired already, during their first matrimonial experiences. Mrs. -Grove was no exception to the rule, and was as dangerous a widow as -need be--having a thorough knowledge of the weaknesses of the male -character and of the way to humour them, and understanding perfectly -how to make herself agreeable to any lord of creation whom fortune -might throw in her way. - -It was no part of her tactics to leave Sir Anthony long in doubt that -it was for herself, and not for either of her daughters, that she -desired to captivate his affections. She was certainly vulgar; but -as, also, she was a comely, well-preserved woman of little more than -forty, who looked rather less than her age, it tickled his vanity -pleasantly to find himself attractive to her; and notwithstanding -his having ridiculed her for setting her cap at him, he did not, -nevertheless, altogether dislike it in the bottom of his heart. It -was true that he had not previously contemplated marrying again; -but then that was only because he had not yet met any particular -person to suggest the thought to him since my mother's death; and -he had been sufficiently occupied and amused with his travels for -the notion not to have occurred to him of itself. Now, however, -that the idea was thus put into his head, he began to reflect upon -the matter seriously; the more he considered it--being all the while -insensibly influenced in its favour by the flattering attentions and -blandishments of the widow--the more favourably did he regard it, -and presently came to the conclusion that a wife was really almost -indispensable to his comfort. He could forgive a little vulgarity -provided she had money to gild it; and, feeling that Mrs. Grove's -pecuniary circumstances had become suddenly interesting to him, he -began putting out feelers on the subject when talking to her. He -imagined himself to be going to work most diplomatically, and to have -artfully concealed the true motive of his questions and remarks; but -the widow was more than a match for him. She at once detected his -curiosity, and guessed the reason for it; and managed cleverly to -impress him with the idea that her jointure and settlements were -considerably larger than was the actual case. Whether or not she -would have accomplished her purpose without this stratagem, it is -impossible to say; but, at any rate, it did what she intended it to -do, and brought matters to a climax. The belief that a rich wife was -to be had, and that it would be foolish of him to miss such an -opportunity, put an end to his irresolution. He proposed, and was -accepted; and within two months from the time that they were -introduced to each other at Amsterdam, she succeeded in attaining -what she desired, and became Lady Trecastle. - -Her ladyship, being a thorough John Bull at heart, had no great -fondness for foreign places and people. She had come to the continent -because she believed it to be a likely hunting-ground whereon to find -a husband; and as soon as she had secured her prey she did not care -about staying abroad any longer. Another thing that made her wish to -return to her native land was, that she was extremely proud of the -newly-acquired handle to her name, and was burning to air it amongst -those who would properly appreciate it; for what country is there in -Europe, Asia, or Africa (about America I say nothing), where a title -produces so much effect, and is so bowed down to and worshipped as in -that abode of snobs--England? Therefore, as soon as she was engaged -to Sir Anthony, she determined to endeavour to make him give up his -nomadic existence, return home, and settle there. By way of paving -the way in this direction she would reproach him, half in jest and -half in earnest, for being an absentee, and having no proper -patriotic spirit; or else she would deliver a harangue upon the -roguery of most agents, and the folly of leaving property to be -managed by them instead of looking after it in person; and with these -and similar observations, she sought to bring him to wish himself -to do the thing that she desired should be done. Finding him -more inclined to listen to her than she had expected, she grew -bolder, and passed from hints to a more direct expression of her -desires. He was evidently not greatly averse to discontinue his -foreign rambles, as I perceived with sorrow. The fact was that he had -only gone abroad because my mother's death gave him gloomy and -disagreeable associations with his house, and on that account he had -taken a temporary dislike to it; but his facility for getting rid of -whatever was unpleasant had made him quite shake off that feeling of -dislike by now. Before long Mrs. Grove had worked upon him so -far that he began even to feel eager to return home, and to look -forward with pleasurable anticipation to the idea of showing the -place to its new mistress, and introducing her to the society of -the neighbourhood. - -I said what I could to oppose going back to England whenever I had -an opportunity; but alas! what chance had I against the influence of -the widow? Of course she carried her point without difficulty; and, -to my great grief, notice to quit was sent to the tenants of Castle -Manor. It so happened that there were accidental circumstances which -made it convenient to the tenants to leave at once, without waiting -for the expiration of the term of the notice, and thus the house was -vacated at an unexpectedly early date. No sooner was this the case -than Sir Anthony and Lady Trecastle returned home and established -themselves there, accompanied by their joint families, which -consisted of Margaret Grove, aged eighteen; Jane Grove, aged -seventeen; and myself, aged rather more than fifteen. - - - - - CHAPTER IV. - - A TIGHT CURB. - - -When an indolent, easy-going, trouble-hating man, such as my father, -marries an energetic, bustling, authority-loving woman, such as Mrs. -Grove, it is not hard to foresee which of the two will bear rule in -the establishment. A very brief acquaintance with Sir Anthony -sufficed to show the widow that, with a little management on her -part, she would be able to govern the household as she liked; that as -long as he was kept amused he would not bother himself to interfere -with her arrangements; and that all she need do in order to keep the -reins entirely in her own hands, was to take care that her way and -his were identical in whatever affected his personal comfort--she -would then be free to please herself as far as all other things were -concerned. She was not, at first, altogether easy in her mind as to -how he would bear the discovery of what the real state of her money -matters was; which discovery, as she knew, he must inevitably make -soon, and might possibly cause him to be seriously angry with her. -But she need not have feared this with a man of his disposition, who -never worried himself about anything that could not be helped. Though -he was, undoubtedly, much annoyed to find how much poorer she was -than he had supposed, yet he reflected, with his usual philosophy, -that it was no use making a fuss about it, now that he had married -her, and that what could not be altered had better be made the best -of. So he gulped down the disappointment with a wry face or two, and -did not attempt to make her suffer for her deceitfulness as she -deserved. - -As soon as she was satisfied on this head, and felt that she was -established in her seat securely, she turned her attention to me--who -would infinitely have preferred being let alone. I had never trusted -to the sincerity of the professions of affection she had lavished on -me in the early stages of our acquaintance, when she had imagined me -to be my father's especial pet; and it speedily became evident that -this distrust of mine had been well founded. She thought it quite -worth while taking trouble to keep the master of the house in good -humour, and would study and humour his likes and dislikes in the most -amiable manner possible. But she saw no reason for extending the same -consideration to a mere insignificant nobody; and when she had -discovered how little he cared for me, and that she might do as she -pleased regarding me and my affairs without danger of interference -from him, she proceeded to take my education in hand, and conduct it -according to her own notions. As her ideas on the subject and mine -were entirely different, and as the more she and I saw of one another -the more we disliked each other, the result of this meddling of hers -was fatal to my comfort. And the two or three years following my -father's second marriage were so horribly dull and tedious to me that -I cannot recall them without a shudder. - -Everything seemed to go against me from the time of that wedding. In -the first place, I resented having a stepmother, and finding myself -forced suddenly into terms of intimacy with the three strangers (her -and her two daughters) who had all at once become part of my family. -Then came the termination of the foreign wanderings that I had found -so pleasant. And now came the culminating misery of being under the -commands of a selfish, vulgar, lying, bullying, stingy, pretentious, -plausible, tyrannical woman, whom I could not endure, and who fully -returned my dislike. - -I had an unlucky knack of perpetually irritating her, and was always -sure to be in the wrong in her eyes. Either I said or did something -that was contrary to her notions of what I ought to have said or -done; or I scandalised her by displaying grievous ignorance of some -subject which she deemed an essential branch of knowledge; or else I -shocked her prejudices in some other way. She was not the woman to -put up quietly with offences of this kind in her own household, and -proceeded without delay to attempt to remedy my deficiencies. -Accordingly she informed my father that she considered my mental -condition to have been neglected terribly; that I had been allowed to -run wild till I was very nearly ruined; and that she saw no chance of -my ever becoming a properly behaved young lady and decent member of -society unless a governess were procured for me immediately, and I -were kept strictly to the schoolroom until such time as I should -come out. Should she, therefore, engage a governess? My father, -as usual, made no objection to a proposal which would in no way -interfere with his own comfort. All he said was that she could do -just as she thought best about it; that he did not himself see much -to complain of in me, and had thought I was not at all bad company, -considering my youth; but that he had no doubt she understood -better than him what was necessary for girls, and that whatever she -did was sure to be right. - -Armed with this permission, she at once took steps to carry out her -intention, and a few days afterwards announced to me the contemplated -innovation. - -"Your father and I have agreed, Ina," she said, "that it is high -time to make a change in your present mode of life--you need to be -put into harness for a bit and broken in. Therefore, I have engaged -a governess for you, and she will be here next week. What I wish -to impress upon you now is, that when she comes you must do what -she tells you, and that I shall expect you to pass your time with -her. I do not approve of your fondness for sitting in your own -room; nor yet of your habit of appearing continually amongst us -elders when there are visitors here, just as if you were grown up -and already introduced into society! The drawing-room is not the -proper place for a girl of your age. Remember that in future you -are to remain always in the schoolroom when indoors, and that, when -not at lessons, you must employ yourself there in some quiet and -ladylike pursuit--needlework perhaps, or something of that kind. And -when you go out you will walk with your governess, and not go -climbing trees, or digging out rabbits, or racing all over the place -like a wild thing, as you generally do." - -The idea of being thus hampered and restrained filled me with dismay; -and in my despair I appealed to my father, in hopes that he would -protect my cherished liberty of action. - -"Why should I have a governess at all?" I exclaimed to him; "I'm -sure I've got on very well without, for ever so long! But even if -I _am_ to have one, surely I may be free of the hateful thing out of -lesson-time, mayn't I? Just think how _horrid_ it would be to be -obliged to be always with her--sitting in the room with her all day, -and only going for stupid, straight-on-end grinds along the hard high -road with her when I go out! Do say that I'm not to be condemned to -that, at all events!" - -No doubt I was a fool for my pains, and ought to have known better -than to suppose that I could move him to oppose his wife on my -behalf. So the event proved, for he declined to interfere in the -matter, and the only effect produced by my appeal was to strengthen -Lady Trecastle's hands by increasing her conviction of the extreme -unlikelihood of my father's ever paying attention to any complaint -that I might make to him. From that time forth, therefore, she felt -more secure than ever in her authority over me, and her tyranny -increased accordingly. When the governess arrived I was kept immured -in the schoolroom the greater part of each day, and was surrounded by -a variety of petty restraints and restrictions which were enough to -have worried any girl, and were especially vexatious and irksome to -one who had had the unusual amount of independence which I had been -enjoying of recent years. I found myself deprived of freedom; always -under _surveillance_; obliged to learn uninteresting lessons; bored; -and constantly tacked on to the petticoats of an individual whose -office of governess made her necessarily hateful in my eyes, however -charming--even angelic--she might really be. Of course such an -existence was perfectly odious to me, and I do not think that I could -have anyhow managed to endure it as long as I did, if I had not -fortunately hit upon a means whereby I could to some extent relieve -its dreary monotony. This resource consisted in victimising, to the -extent of my power, any rash female who had undertaken to instruct -me, playing off upon her ill-natured pranks of all kinds, and leaving -no stone unturned to make her life a burden to her till I had fairly -driven her out of the house. - -What a dreadful confession of unamiability! some reader may, perhaps, -here exclaim. Well--I do not deny it. Be it remembered that the -purpose of this narrative is, not to set forth an imaginary picture -of virtue and excellence, but simply an accurate likeness of myself; -and I should evidently fail of accomplishing that purpose if I were -to conceal or gloss over those sentiments which I really entertained -and acted upon. But even if my behaviour _does_ lay me open to the -charge of unamiability, I do not think that that need be wondered at, -when the peculiarities of my natural disposition, of my bringing-up, -and of my whole circumstances, are taken into consideration. - -The occupation of bullying and annoying my governesses to the utmost -possible extent had a double recommendation in my eyes. Not only did -it supply an ample field for my ingenuity, and give me something -amusing to think about in the dreary walks and long hours spent in -the schoolroom, but also it afforded me the satisfaction of -retaliation. I had a savage joy in knowing that I was able to pay off -my companion for some of the vexations that she was the means of -inflicting on me; and I relished the thought that even if I _did_ -have a rough time myself, yet at all events I did not suffer alone. -Endless, therefore, were the tricks and practical jokes which I used -to devise and execute for the aggravation of whatever unlucky -individual happened to have taken charge of my education; and so -skilful was I in my operations that it was but seldom any piece of -mischief could be traced home to me, however greatly I might be -suspected of its authorship. I was an adept, too, at the art of -being extremely insulting and provoking without saying anything that -would seem a just cause of irritation if repeated to a third person. -I knew how to speak with an offensiveness of voice and manner which -gave an injurious significance to words that were in themselves -innocent; and by this method I have often succeeded in making a -governess wildly angry, although I had given her nothing tangible -that could be taken hold of and brought against me to substantiate a -charge of rudeness. If she complained that I had been impertinent, I -assumed an air of injured innocence, repeated exactly what I had -said, asked what harm there was in that? and declared that it was -very unfair to blame me because Miss so-and-so had chosen to fly -into a passion about nothing. In fact I was aggravating enough to -have provoked the patient Grizzel herself; and as governesses are -not much apt to be patient Grizzels in their relations to their -pupils (however gentle and long-suffering they may make themselves -appear to the heads of the establishment), our schoolroom was in a -constant state of turmoil and ferment, and there was a remarkable -difficulty in getting governesses to stay at Castle Manor. About a -month or six weeks was generally enough to disgust them with the -situation, and they rarely failed to give notice at the end of that -time. This was an event that always gave me a sensation of unmixed -satisfaction; as, for one thing, I then felt that I had scored a -fresh victory and routed another enemy, and also, I knew that the -arrival of her successor could not fail to bring some small amount -of variety into the monotonous routine of existence of which I was so -deadly tired. - -But this constant change of governesses over which I rejoiced, and -which was chiefly my doing, was by no means equally agreeable to Lady -Trecastle. When an instructress went, it was she who had to procure a -successor, and she did not find it at all amusing to be incessantly -answering advertisements, writing for characters, and that sort of -thing. And as, notwithstanding the difficulty of ever actually -proving a misdemeanour against me, she had strong doubts of my -innocence, therefore she considered me responsible for the bother she -continually had about governesses, and regarded me with increased -disfavour on that account. She had the sense to suspect that there -would not be such endless storms in the schoolroom if the pupil were -not unusually unmanageable and turbulent; and, acting on that -opinion, she made several efforts to induce me to be more tractable, -in order that thereby she might be saved the trouble that my conduct -entailed upon her. - -At one time she tried the effect of addressing serious rebukes and -admonitions to me; but I cared not one straw for them. Then she -increased the strictness of my confinement, and ordained that every -disturbance should always be followed by the loss of the next -half-holiday or other pleasure of which I might have a chance; but -still I remained unsubdued. Then a third method of overcoming me -suddenly struck her, and she one day wound up a lengthy scolding by -declaring that her patience was at an end, that she would _not_ stand -the perpetual commotions I caused any longer, and that the very next -time one occurred I should be packed off to some school at once. - -Now it was all very well for her to talk big of sending me to school; -but in point of fact I felt pretty sure that she would do nothing of -the kind, because it was very convenient to her to have a governess -in the house on account of her own two daughters, for whom she did -not want to go to the expense of masters, and who often needed -assistance in the various accomplishments she wished them to acquire. -This assistance they were in the habit of receiving from whoever -happened to be in charge of me, though they were too old to be -regularly in the schoolroom, and as my going to school would remove -the ostensible reason for having a governess at Castle Manor, it was -not at all likely that she meant to do what she said. - -But though she knew the threat to be an empty one, that did not at -all hinder her from uttering it. Being at her wits' end for something -to hold over me _in terrorem_, it suddenly occurred to her that a -girl who had always lived with her own belongings, as I had done, -would probably dread the notion of being sent away alone amongst -strangers, and that therefore the school project stood a very good -chance of awing me into submission. - -Instead of that, however, I evinced such delight at the prospect as -took the wind out of her sails completely. I had not in reality the -slightest objection to school, because it would be a change, and -anything in the shape of a change would be welcome. And of course -my manifestations of delight were all the more exaggerated as I -perceived her annoyance at finding me look forward joyfully to the -thing she hoped I should have feared. Thus she was thoroughly -discomfited; and never again did I hear her say I was to go to -school, though I several times returned to the subject of myself, -asking to know when I was going, saying I hoped it would be soon, -etc. etc. I must say that I greatly enjoyed having triumphed over -her so completely; and I reflected with malicious pleasure on the -vexation and humiliation it must be to her to know that I had -detected the emptiness of her threat, and could henceforth look -down upon her with all the contempt which an utterer of such threats -is sure to inspire. - -But though I did what I could to procure a little change and -excitement by making myself disagreeable, and plaguing my stepmother -and teachers, yet the tedium of my life was so great as to be almost -unendurable; and again and again did I consider the expediency of -putting an end to it by running away from home, and trusting to my -own resources for getting a livelihood. I used to meditate seriously -on how the thing was to be done, arranging every detail, foreseeing -and meeting probable obstacles, providing for possible contingencies, -and working the whole scheme out from beginning to end in my own -mind. It seemed to me quite feasible; and as I was not a bit afraid -of failure, or of what might happen to me when cast upon the world by -myself, I should certainly have put my idea into practice if there -had not been one consideration which deterred me and kept me where I -was. This was the thought that I was very nearly seventeen. At that -age I was convinced that girls invariably came out, and therefore -took it for granted that I should do so also. And as the yoke under -which I groaned would be broken before long in the natural course of -events, it seemed better to resign myself for the short space during -which I should still be subject to it, rather than to anticipate the -day of emancipation by so desperate a measure as running away from -home. - -But in my calculations as to the time of my being brought out, I -had quite omitted one most important factor, viz. what might be my -stepmother's wishes in regard to that matter. These, as it happened, -were diametrically opposed to mine. She had no fancy to go about with -three young ladies in tow, nor did she feel inclined to risk spoiling -the matrimonial chances of Margaret or Jane by leaving either of them -at home, and taking me out with her instead. Therefore she intended -to keep me back in a state of pupilage as long as possible, and to -endeavour to get one or both of her own daughters married out of the -way before I should make my appearance in society. In consequence of -this private scheme of hers, the attainment of the age of seventeen, -from which I had hoped such great things, produced no amelioration in -my condition. I was astonished and disgusted to find that the days -and weeks dragged heavily on at lessons as before, and brought no -indications of the approach of that liberty to which I had looked -forward confidently. Of course, I was not going to stand this without -complaining, so I remonstrated with Lady Trecastle, declaring that -I was being treated very unfairly, that every girl came out at -seventeen, and that I ought now to be let to share equally with my -step-sisters in whatever invitations for balls, dinners, or other -gaieties might arrive at Castle Manor. My complaints were unheeded, -however, and my grievance remained unredressed. I was not fit to go -into society, she said; I was so untrained, stupid, disagreeable, and -bad-tempered, that she would be ashamed to take me out, and I must -positively remain in the schoolroom till my manners and temper should -be improved. Chafing and fretting under repeated disappointments, I -managed to get through another dreary year of monotony, but when my -eighteenth birthday arrived and found me still a prisoner in the -schoolroom, I resolved not to stand this treatment any longer. It -became evident to me that her ladyship destined me to play the part -of Cinderella. As I had no fancy for that _rôle_, and as I had not a -fairy godmother to come to my assistance, I must take the matter -into my own hands and act fairy godmother for myself. Therefore I -determined to execute the plan which I had already reflected upon -so often, and to run away from home and take my chance of what might -afterwards befall me. - - - - - CHAPTER V. - - BREAKING LOOSE. - - -Had running away from home been a brand new idea that had never -before occurred to me, I daresay I should have had to postpone -carrying it out till I had had time to mature the design and -consider how it was to be accomplished. As it was, however, there -was no need for delay on that account, for I had pondered on the -subject often enough to be thoroughly familiar with it, and to have -discovered a variety of methods for executing the project. In all -these schemes there was one point which I had always kept steadily in -view, and that was the importance of so arranging my flight as to -secure myself a long start before my absence should be discovered. I -had but little fear of managing to evade pursuit, if only I could -get a good way ahead of it at first. I saw that the best means of -ensuring this would be to have the coast clear of authorities when I -took myself off. Therefore I determined to put off my departure for -a few days longer, in order to avail myself of a particularly -favourable opportunity which would then occur, as my father, -step-mother, and two step-sisters would be going to stay away for a -ball and other gaieties at a friend's house. When once they were out -of the way, there would be no one to interfere with me except my -governess, Miss Smith, and I thought it would be odd indeed if I -could not manage to get rid of her also somehow or other. Several -expedients whereby this might be effected soon suggested themselves -to me, and after a little consideration I made up my mind to try to -impose upon her with a sham telegram. She was a somewhat colourless -individual, much given to writing letters and reading novels, -nervous, easily fussed, sentimental, and possessing a sister named -Alice who kept a school at Carlisle, and to whom it was evident that -she was very much attached. Now I felt certain that if she believed -this beloved sister to be in need of her, nothing would induce her to -stay away, and that a telegraphic summons from Miss Alice Smith would -cause my Miss Smith to rush off to Carlisle as fast as trains would -take her there. Such a summons, therefore, I must contrive that she -should receive. The only difficulty about forging the telegram I -required for my purpose was that I had not the proper paper or -envelope; the latter I might possibly contrive to do without, if -necessary, but the former was absolutely indispensable, and if I -could not get hold of a piece of it, I should have to relinquish the -telegram scheme altogether and substitute some other. - -In order to procure what I wanted I pretended to be in need -of stamps, and upon that pretext went to the post-office at -Greenlea, as our village was called. The post-office was also a -telegraph-office and sort of general emporium, and was kept by an old -man named Jones, who had been there for years, and was certain not to -dream it possible that one of the ladies from Castle Manor should -have nefarious designs upon any of the stores over which he presided. -Having bought my stamps, and made one or two friendly remarks to the -proprietor, I affected a sudden interest in the working of the -telegraph, and was, as I expected, promptly invited behind the -counter to inspect the machine more closely. The blank forms and -envelopes requisite for sending out messages were lying close by -amongst some other papers, and somehow I was awkward enough to upset -the whole lot of papers together on the ground. "Oh how very stupid -of me!" I exclaimed, penitently, kneeling down as I spoke, and -beginning to collect the scattered papers; "I'll pick them up again -in a moment, Jones; don't you trouble!" What with old age and -rheumatism, Jones' joints were somewhat stiff, and he was not sorry -to be saved from the necessity of stooping down in the rather -confined space behind the counter. - -"Well, indeed, 'tis a shame for you to be doing that, Miss, and me -looking on idle," he replied; "but I'm much obliged to you, too, and -I won't say no to a good offer. We old folks ben't quite so flippant -to move ourselves up and down as you young 'uns be; and it be a bit -narrer in here atween the wall and the counter, you see." So he -complacently received the papers from me and restored them to their -places as I handed them up in instalments; and he never missed the -telegraph form and envelope which I slipped swiftly into my pocket -whilst his eyes were turned in another direction. I left his shop in -triumph, having thus supplied myself with the means to which I -trusted for removing Miss Smith off the premises; and I was now all -ready to commence operations as soon as my stepmother and her husband -and daughters should take themselves off upon their intended visit. - -The eventful day arrived, and I stood looking at them drive away from -the house with a curious mixture of feelings--partly gloomy and -partly cheerful. There went these people who constituted my family, -and I meant never to set eyes on them again if I could help it. They -were going to lark about, dance, be jolly, and amuse themselves in -all kinds of ways, and it was a horrid shame that I was not going -too. I should have been, only that Lady Trecastle would not let me -have fair play, and had chosen to spite me and to treat me like -a child when I was not one. I considered that she had behaved -infamously to me. Other young people of my age and position could go -to balls, enjoy themselves, have lots of fun, and frolic to their -heart's content, and it was grossly unjust to debar me from doing the -same. I was an oppressed and harshly-treated victim. I was being -defrauded of my rights and ousted from my proper place through the -enmity of a malevolent step-mother and the negligence of a father, -who was too selfish and indolent to care what became of me, or any -one else, as long as he was himself happy. - -As I stood at the window watching the departing carriage, and -meditating on the wrongs that had rankled long in my breast, and had -now at last reached their culminating point, I felt a single burning -tear gather slowly in each eye and brim over on the cheek beneath. -Weeping is not a weakness to which I am given, for I am, as a rule, -one of the least tearful of mortals. But that tear was an exceptional -one, and was drawn from me solely by a feeling of bitter resentment -for past injuries, not by any foolish regrets or sentimentality -relating to my approaching separation from both home and family. - -Mingled with these disagreeable thoughts, however, there was also -present in my mind an exhilarating idea, which soon dispelled the -unpleasant ones even as the sun disperses cloud. How could I mind -anything now that liberty was so close at hand? What did it matter -that Lady Trecastle had been able to convert my home into a hateful -prison, now that I was about to break my bonds and cut myself adrift -from it? Those people whose departure I had just watched should find -a little surprise awaiting them on their return, in the shape of my -disappearance! Freedom, novelty, and adventures lay before me. -Without these things life was not worth having, and I was on the -brink of enjoying them. Hurrah! The wide world was going to be open -to me, and I was about to enter on an unknown future, wherein -everything would be different from the past. The thought of all -this made my pulses throb with excitement, and filled me with wild -eagerness for the first taste of the anticipated joys. - -I did not mean to deliver the forged telegram to Miss Smith till it -should be nearly time for the train, by which I expected that she -would go to Carlisle, to leave Sparkton--that being the name of our -nearest town. As that train did not start till past four o'clock -in the afternoon, and as Sir Anthony and Lady Trecastle and her -daughters had left home in the morning, I had to control my -impatience for some hours longer. Part of this time I employed in -preparing the telegram. Upon the blank form I scrawled in a feigned -hand as follows--"Alice Smith, Carlisle, to Miss Smith, Castle Manor, -Greenlea, Sparkton. _Come without losing a moment. I need your help -immediately_." Having enclosed this in the proper envelope of thin -yellow paper, and directed it to Miss Smith, I did not neglect also -to fill in the blank spaces on the outside with the requisite -information as to the time when the message was sent out, when handed -in, etc. I knew that she would probably be far too much perturbed by -the telegram to notice any little irregularity about its appearance, -but, for all that, I meant to be on the safe side, and to have -everything in order, so that there might be no possible ground -for suspicion. - -When the due time had arrived for me to spring the mine that I had -prepared for her I betook myself to the schoolroom, where she was -engaged as usual in inditing epistles to some of her numerous -correspondents. The precious telegram was in my hand, and I proceeded -to deliver it to her, and also to account for the unusual circumstance -of its being brought by me instead of by a servant, according to the -ordinary course of things. - -"Here's something for you," I said; "I went out to pick some flowers -just now, and as I was coming back towards the house I overtook a -child from Greenlea with this in its hand. Of course I saw at a -glance that it was a telegram--one can't mistake the appearance of -the article--and I asked which of the household it was for. It's for -you; and as I was coming straight in then I thought I would bring it -myself, and save the child having to come any farther." - -The mere sight of the telegram sufficed to flutter Miss Smith's -nerves, and her fingers shook visibly as she opened it. The instant -she had perused its contents she jumped up in a tremendous state of -agitation, and exclaimed: "Good gracious! it's from my sister Alice! -She wants me immediately, but doesn't say what's the matter. What -_can_ have happened? Perhaps she's ill! I must go to her at once. -What trains are there? Isn't there a _Bradshaw_ somewhere? _That's_ -not it, nor _that_, nor _that_!" - -As she spoke she hurriedly took up one after another of the books -lying near, and examined their titles to see if either of them was a -_Bradshaw_, although there was nothing in the room that bore any -resemblance whatever to the well-known work. But she was a great deal -too much upset to notice that. I, however, needed no _Bradshaw_ to -enable me to give her the information she wanted, as I had already -ascertained exactly the starting-time of the next train that would -suit her, and had it at the tip of my tongue. - -"The last train to the North from Sparkton starts at 4.20 in the -afternoon, I know," I answered; "that's the one for you to go by, and -if you go at once you'll just have time to catch it. Better go and -get ready as fast as you can, and I'll order the carriage to take you -to the station." - -"Yes, yes, that'll be the way; thank you so much," she returned, -beginning to hasten towards the door. Before she had quite reached it -a sudden thought struck her, and she turned round with a look of -consternation, exclaiming, "Oh dear! I quite forgot that you'll be -all alone! I'm afraid Lady Trecastle won't like it. How unlucky for -her just to have gone away! But really what _can_ I do? Read the -telegram yourself, Ina; you'll see it's absolutely _imperative_ I -should go at once. My poor, dear Alice! I'm sure something quite -_dreadful_ must have happened to make her send for me like this. It -can't be any _trifle_, I know, for she is one of the calmest, least -excitable mortals on the face of the earth!" - -She's not much like you, then, was my inward reflection, as I looked -at the spectacle of pitiable nervousness presented by my governess, -with her fingers twitching aimlessly to and fro, and her face -expressing feeble and helpless apprehension of evil. Indeed, I was -not altogether free from a feeling of compunction for being the means -of throwing her into such a state of distress, which must continue, -as I knew, till she should reach Carlisle, and discover that the -telegram had been a sham. But then she had to be got out of the way -somehow or other, and it would never do for a young woman who meant -to make her own way in the world, as I did, to be squeamish about -inflicting pain on other people if necessary; and after all it was -partly her own fault for having become the governess of a person who -did not want one at all. Besides that, the more miserable she was -now, the greater would be her joy and relief when she should learn -that her fears were unfounded. Really the bliss of that moment would -be so exquisite that I quite looked forward to it on her account! - -When she handed me the telegram I of course affected to have no -previous knowledge of its contents, and even made believe to have a -difficulty in making out one or two of the words. Having read it -through, I said, "Oh certainly, you're bound to go at once, there -can't be a doubt of that. Don't bother yourself about Lady Trecastle; -I'll tell her exactly how the matter was. You know she and my father -will be back in a couple of days, and I shall be all right till their -return. But you'll lose your train if you don't look sharp now." - -Reassured by this speech, she hurried off to get ready, whilst I rang -the bell to order the carriage. It was an object to me to have her -out of the room when I did this, as her absence enabled me at the -same time that I ordered the carriage to send word to the cook that -no dinner would be wanted that night. Miss Smith, I said, had been -called away suddenly, and I meant to travel with her a short -distance, to the house of one of my aunts, with whom I should stay -until Sir Anthony and Lady Trecastle returned. There was nothing -unlikely about my paying a visit to my aunt when left alone -unexpectedly; and I made this announcement to prevent the servants -from becoming alarmed at my disappearance, and bringing about a -premature discovery of my flight by communicating at once with my -father. - -I next went to Miss Smith to tell her that I was coming with her as -far as the station to see her off; I said that I knew my father -wanted to have some things mended at a shop in Sparkton, and that I -thought I might as well avail myself of this opportunity of taking -them to the town, now that the carriage was going there with her. Of -course the discrepancy between this statement and the one which I had -just made for the benefit of the household would become apparent, and -put me into an awkward position, if she and the servants should -happen to compare notes as to what I had been saying. But I felt I -could reckon confidently that no such comparison would take place; -as, for one thing, my governess was a deal too much flurried and -taken up with her own affairs to think of anything else; and, for -another thing, my precaution of not delivering the telegram till -there was only just time to catch the train, prevented her from -having time for idle conversation, even if she _had_ happened to -feel disposed for such a thing. - -I had had considerable difficulty in making up my mind what to do -about luggage. If I did not take any, that would look odd to the -servants, who believed me to be going to stay with my aunt; but then -Miss Smith, on the other hand, who fancied that I was merely going to -drive into Sparkton to see her off, would be astonished at any -appearance of boxes, bags, or portmanteaux that indicated an intended -absence from home. Besides that, it would not suit my plan of action -to be encumbered with anything that I could not manage easily to -carry through the streets with my own hands. - -I had considered this knotty point for some time before I could -determine how to settle it. What I finally resolved upon was to take -a small hand-bag which was just large enough to hold sufficient -wearing apparel for a two night's visit (so as to impose upon the -servants), and which was yet not too large for me to be able to carry -about easily. Then, if my governess should make any remarks about -its presence in the carriage, and wonder what I wanted it for, I -could tell her that it contained the things for my father that were -going to be mended. Into this hand-bag I had already packed all the -jewellery I possessed, and as many clothes and other articles likely -to come useful as there was room for. Thus all my preparations were -completed, and I was ready for a start. - -I did not wish to go away without bidding adieu to Lady Trecastle, -so I had written her a farewell letter; and whilst Miss Smith was -putting on her things, I placed it where my stepmother would be -certain to find it on her return. It ran thus-- - - "LADY TRECASTLE--In my opinion it is high time for me to see - the world and enjoy myself like other people, and as you seem - resolved that I shall do nothing of the kind, I am going to - settle the matter without asking your leave. I have timed my - departure to suit the sailing of a vessel which is going where I - wish to go, and by the time you receive this I shall be out of - England and far away. You and I have hit it off together so - badly, that I have no doubt you will regard my leaving as a - subject for sincere congratulations--which permit me to offer to - you. I fear that you will not receive them from any one else, on - account of the hypocritical appearance of grief under which you - are sure to think it necessary to conceal your real joy. I - foresee also that you will affect the utmost anxiety to recover - me; this will, of course, involve a considerable amount of - expense, since you will find it difficult to satisfy Mrs. Grundy - of the sincerity of your protestations, unless you employ - detectives, and send out far and wide in search of me. I reflect - on all this with pleasure, for I know well how you will grudge - every penny that is spent on so unworthy an object as myself; and - as I have no fear of being found, I am sure that the money will - be spent in vain. Think of that, Lady Trecastle, you who hate - waste--think of all that you'll have to throw away on _my_ - account! Sincerely trusting that you and I may never meet again, - and that Margaret and Jane may be able to continue their studies - without the assistance which they have hitherto received from - the governesses who were supposed to be engaged for my sole - benefit--Believe me to remain, yours in no sense at all, - - INA TRECASTLE." - -It is not to be supposed from this letter that I had any idea of -going straight abroad; on the contrary, I had made up my mind to get -to London as quickly as possible, and there to hide myself, and be -lost to pursuit, by the time that my flight should be known. But -I put in the bit about leaving England on the chance of Lady -Trecastle's believing it to be my real intention, and being thereby -thrown on the wrong track, and caused extra worry and expense. She -being my especial enemy, I wanted to annoy her as much as I could; -and as my father always managed to slip out of whatever was -troublesome, I knew that all the bother of the search after me would -certainly fall upon her shoulders, and that the more troublesome and -costly it was, the more my longing for revenge would be gratified. - -It cost me nothing to leave my father. Since his second marriage he -and I had seen but little of each other--I having been kept closely -in the schoolroom, and he not having troubled himself to alter -whatever arrangements his wife thought fit to make. Whether I were at -home or not would make no difference to him I knew. I cared for no -one, and no one cared for me, exactly describes the condition in -which I was on that afternoon when I drove off from Castle Manor -with my tearful and apprehensive governess, to catch the 4.20 train -at Sparkton. I was leaving a home wherein was no person or thing that -was dear to me, where there was nothing for me to regret, to which I -was bound by no sweet or tender associations, and which had no kind -of hold over me. And I was about to exchange dulness and dreary -monotony for action, adventures, excitement, and an unknown state of -existence, where I must be always on the alert, ready for everything, -and trust to no one except myself. To all this I looked forward with -a delight that was not marred by the faintest tinge of timidity, -anxiety, or fear of failing in what I had set myself to accomplish. -No wonder that I was radiant with joy, and found some difficulty in -preserving my usual demeanour sufficiently not to arouse Miss Smith's -suspicions. - - - - - CHAPTER VI. - - A PHOTOGRAPH. - - -There are two railway stations in Sparkton, which is a town of -sufficient size and importance to have two different railway -companies competing for its patronage; and this circumstance -rendered it all the easier for me to escape without leaving traces -for any pursuers to follow. The train by which I intended to go to -London would not leave until about two hours later than Miss Smith's -train to the north, and did not start from the same station. What, -therefore, I meant to do was to dismiss the coachman, John, and send -him home under the impression that I had gone away with my governess, -according to the announcement of my plans which I had made to our -Castle Manor household. Then, as soon as I had seen Miss Smith safely -off, I intended to take my bag in my hand, and proceed on foot to the -other station, there to await the departure of the London train. - -It would, of course, never do for Miss Smith to see the carriage, -which she imagined was going to take me home again, drive straight -away directly that it had deposited us at the station; so, when we -got out, I told John to wait a minute, and then accompanied her to -the ticket-office. Some other travellers who had arrived before us -were blocking up the entrance, and she had to wait her turn to take -her ticket. This delay greatly increased her nervousness, and she -began to be in a desperate fidget lest she should be too late. I -showed her, by the station-clock overhead, that she had fully ten -minutes to spare, but she was too much upset to be calmed by reason. -Pulling out her purse she commenced fumbling at it hurriedly, and -was dismayed to find that she could not open it. "Oh, Ina!" she -exclaimed, helplessly, "what _am_ I to do? Something has happened to -my purse, and I can't get it open! Dear! dear! I _know_ I shall be -too late! Can you lend me some money?" - -The purse would not open for the very excellent reason that she was -tugging at the hinges instead of at the clasp; I doubt whether she -would ever have found this out for herself in the condition in which -she then was; but I quickly saw what was the matter, and rectified it -for her. As soon as I had done so, I said, "By the by, there's a -parcel to be called for at a shop in the next street, which John will -have plenty of time to go and fetch whilst I'm waiting to see you -off. I forgot to tell him of it before I left the carriage, so I'm -just going to send him there. I won't be a minute, and shall be back -before you've got your ticket." - -The poor woman looked at me with a bewildered air at first, as though -she had hardly understood what I said to her, and felt only alarmed -at the idea of being left alone in the crowded station. Then, seeming -to realise the position of affairs all of a sudden, she answered -quickly, "Oh, but I forgot, hadn't you better go and do your shopping -at once without waiting for me to start? I'm afraid if the horses -were to catch cold or anything, Lady Trecastle would be very much -vexed; and, perhaps, she might think it was my fault. Not that I want -to lose your help, only I shouldn't like to make her angry. If these -people in front will only be quick, I _may_ still be able to catch -the train perhaps!" - -"Don't be afraid--you've heaps of time," I returned; "and I'm sure -there's no chance of the horses taking cold; besides, they'll be kept -moving by going on this errand that I'm going to send them off for. -I mean to stay and see the last of you, put you comfortably into your -carriage, get you some papers to amuse yourself with on the journey, -and see that you don't forget anything at the last moment." - -In her then condition of mental disorganisation on account of her -anxiety about her sister, she was really hardly capable of looking -after herself. She seemed to be vaguely aware of this, and to regard -me as a sort of tower of strength which she could rely upon, and her -face brightened perceptibly at the assurance that she would have the -benefit of my protecting presence until she was fairly under weigh. - -"Thank you, dear Ina," she said, gratefully. "I'm so _much_ obliged. -I can't tell you how kind and good I think it of you to give yourself -so much trouble about me." - -"Oh, it's no trouble," I replied, repressing with difficulty an -inclination to laugh at the thoroughness with which she was being -humbugged. So saying I left her, and hurried away to give John his -instructions. Though the situation struck me as being ludicrous, yet -I had an uncomfortable sense of being in a false position, and did -not feel particularly anxious to listen to her expressions of earnest -gratitude. I had, for my own purposes, deliberately thrown her into a -state of serious distress caused by what was absolutely false, and I -was now staying with her merely because it suited me to do so, and -not at all out of regard to her necessities; considering all this, it -did seem a little strong for me to be posing in the character of her -especial friend, and receiving thanks as though I were remaining to -see her off out of pure good nature! Yet, after all, I could not help -acting as I had done. I was bound to clear the course for myself -somehow or other; and if the process of being swept aside happened to -be unpleasant to any obstacle, why, that was unfortunate for the -obstacle, but no reason why the sweeping aside should be given up. - -Having told John that he need not wait any longer, I watched him -drive away, and then returned to my governess, who was, by that -time, again in need of assistance. She had paid for her ticket with -a £5 note, and received a considerable amount of change, which she -had managed to let slip through her trembling fingers as she was -transferring it to her purse, and it had rolled hither and thither on -the floor. Firmly convinced that the train was on the very point of -starting, she was, when I arrived, just about to hurry off and take -her seat, and abandon the money to its fate, though she could but ill -have afforded to lose it. Luckily I was in time to stop this folly, -and persuaded her to stay and join me in picking up the scattered -coins, which we soon accomplished. Whilst thus employed, I could not -help reflecting on how differently she and I were constituted, and -on how much the most fit I was to look after myself. - -It must be a queer sensation, thought I, to care for any one to such -a pitch as she does. Fancy being in such a state of mind as she is at -the mere idea of some other person's being ill, or in trouble of some -kind or other! Well, I thank my stars I am somewhat tougher than -that, and not _quite_ such a softy. Precious little chance I should -have, else, of shifting for myself, and fighting my own way in the -world, as I mean to do! - -It was with a sense of pity, wherein (as is often the case) there was -a strong admixture of contempt, that I escorted her to the train, -found her the right carriage, established her in it with such -travelling comforts as were to be had, repeated over and over the -names of the places where she would have to change before reaching -Carlisle, for fear of her forgetting them, and paid her whatever -other little attentions I could think of. She, poor woman, was quite -overwhelmed at such thoughtful politeness on my part, and received it -with the utmost gratitude, without dreaming for an instant of the -desire to make some kind of amends for the anxiety I had brought upon -her, which was the real motive of my unwontedly civil behaviour. - -I tried hard to raise her spirits, and when the train began to move I -walked beside it for a step or two saying cheerful parting words to -her. Faster and faster did the long line of carriages slip along by -the platform, and I stood still, watching her wave me a farewell with -her tear-besprinkled handkerchief. In a minute more she had passed -out of sight, and I felt, that now the last link of my chain was -indeed broken, that I had got rid of all the authorities whom I -detested, and that I was in very truth my own mistress. - -The first thing for me to do now was to make my way to the other -station, and there await the starting of my train for London. In -order to avoid the risk of being recognised by any one in traversing -the town, I had, before leaving home, put into my pocket a thick -veil; this I now donned, and then, with my bag in my hand, issued -out into the streets. Here I soon had cause to congratulate myself on -having taken the precaution to wear a veil, for, on turning a corner, -I suddenly found myself confronted by our own carriage, with John on -the box, drawn up close to the pavement. John was profiting by the -absence of his master's family to do some shopping on his own -account, and also to enjoy the society of a female acquaintance, who -was perched up on the seat beside him, displaying manifold and -gaudy ribbons from that point of vantage with an air of immense -complacency. Though he glanced at me as I passed, he did not -recognise me through my thick veil, and I reached my destination in -safety, without meeting any one else whom I knew. - -The train by which I was going was not due to start for some time to -come, and I could not take a ticket for it yet. As I was anxious not -to attract observation by being seen hanging about the station, I -withdrew into the waiting-room with a book in my hand, and settled -myself there quietly, as if to pass the time in reading. I was, -in truth, too much excited to fix my attention on my book, but I -wished to _appear_ to be engrossed in it all the same; and as it is -obviously impossible to read much through a thick veil, I threw mine -back when I began to pretend to study the volume which I held. - -I was undisturbed in my seclusion for a considerable while; but just -as I was beginning to think that it was getting near time for the -train to start, and that the ticket-office would soon be open, two -ladies entered the room, attended by a footman laden with their -rugs, bags, and etceteras. These he deposited on the table and then -retired, touching his hat respectfully, and saying that the tickets -would not be given out for another five minutes. - -The lady nearest me was a middle-aged person. I saw at a glance, as -she entered the room, that she was a complete stranger to me, and I -looked at her carelessly, without at first noticing her younger -companion. I had, for the moment, forgotten that my veil was up; but -then, suddenly remembering it, and also the expediency of concealing -my face before going to take my ticket, I was just about to lower the -odious stifling mass of thick gauze, when the younger lady moved -towards the table to take something out of her travelling-bag. She -looked at me in passing, and as our eyes met I felt a thrill of -alarm, and a conviction that she was some one I had met before, -though I could not recollect where or how, or what her name was. -Luckily she had evidently no recollection of me, but passed on -without a gleam of recognition in her face, got what she wanted out -of the bag, and returned to her seat. None the less, I was perfectly -certain I knew her, and all at once it flashed across me who she was. -She must be Kitty Mervyn, the girl whom I had met and taken a strong -fancy to at Lugano four years ago. Since then we had both of us grown -and altered considerably in appearance, and she had developed into a -tall, handsome, stately-looking young woman. But it was so uncommon -an event for any one to make any great impression on me, that I was -not likely to forget whoever had been able to work that miracle, and -I felt positive that I could not now be mistaken as to Kitty's -identity. I perceived, also, that she had no idea whatever of who I -was, which was most fortunate for me, as it would have greatly -interfered with my plans to be seen there by any one who knew me. -I was quite aware of this, and rejoiced at my good luck; and -yet--strange creatures that we are!--even whilst I rejoiced, I -suffered a pang of keen mortification. Hardly ever in my life had I -felt disposed to honour one of my fellow-creatures with any especial -degree of liking or approval; and when, for once, I had been moved to -do so, it seemed as if the individual thus distinguished ought -certainly to have felt some corresponding amount of inclination for -me. Yet this had not been the case, since Kitty Mervyn had forgotten -me, though I had not forgotten her. And therefore I had a sense of -annoyance and humiliation at this forgetfulness, notwithstanding its -opportuneness, and the inconvenience that it would have been to me to -be recognised just then, when it was my great object to leave no -trace that could show what had become of me after the time that I had -parted from Miss Smith. - -As soon as the ticket-office was open, the footman returned to inform -the ladies of that fact; then they left the waiting-room attended by -the man carrying their _impedimenta_ for them as before. Having -stayed a minute longer to let them get out of the way, I was on the -point of following them, when I noticed a small article lying under -the table, and picked it up. It was one of those purses that are -purse and pocket-book combined, and I guessed that it had probably -fallen out of Miss Mervyn's bag when she had opened it just now to -take out something else. What should I do with the purse? I had -little doubt of who the rightful owner was, and could easily restore -it to her if I chose. Only the question was whether I _did_ choose, -for there was no one near to see me find it, and I was free to do as -I pleased. At some other time I might, perhaps, have followed the -dictates of honesty, but at the present moment I was out of charity -with Kitty. I had not forgiven her for the wound which she had -unconsciously inflicted on my self-esteem, and was much more inclined -to spite her, if I had a chance, than to do her a good turn; -therefore, after hesitating for a few moments, I pocketed what I -had found, postponing the examination of its contents to the first -opportunity when I should be at leisure and unobserved. - -Now that I was going to trust to my own resources for a livelihood, -money was a most important object to me, and as I had no intention of -wasting it in needless luxury, I contented myself with a humble -third-class ticket. Having secured this, I took my seat in the -London train, and was, in due course of time, whirled away from -Sparkton towards the metropolis, where I meant to seek my fortune. -At starting there were two or three other passengers in the carriage -with me, but they got out at the first few stations where we stopped, -and when I found myself alone I thought I might as well take that -opportunity of seeing what Miss Mervyn's purse contained. - -I was glad to find in it several pounds in gold and silver. Some -extra cash would be extremely handy to me in present circumstances, -and would no doubt be far more useful to me than to her, I thought. -Then I turned to the pocket-book half of the purse, and began to -explore that also. Here there were some postage stamps, a set of -directions for some kind of fancy-work that was just then all the -fashion, and a letter addressed to the Hon. Katherine Mervyn--which -last was a conclusive proof that my conjecture as to the ownership of -the purse was right. I took the liberty of unfolding and reading the -letter, which was a heavy bill for gloves and fans. The largeness of -the amount caused me a surprise, which was soon changed into envy as -I reflected that I, too, might have been in a state to require a -similar profusion of these articles, if my step-mother had not -unjustly shut me off from the privileges of my age and rank in life. -It was strange how the perusal of that bill, and the thought that it -had been incurred by a girl no older than myself, irritated me afresh -against Lady Trecastle, and increased my former sense of being a much -injured and aggrieved mortal! - -The bill, stamps, and work directions appeared at first sight to -comprise the whole contents of the pocket-book; I was about to shut -it up under that impression, when I bethought me that I was in want -of a new purse, as mine was a good deal worn, and that if Kitty's -was in good condition I had better substitute it for my own. This -idea made me take up again the one I had found, and look it over -carefully. The close inspection revealed an inner pocket underneath -the flap of the other, and ingeniously contrived so as not to attract -notice. Within this sly hiding-place was a piece of cardboard wrapped -in silver paper, which, on being opened, disclosed the photograph of -a very good-looking young man in military uniform. My curiosity was -aroused as to who the original might be, and I turned it round and -round in hopes of discovering some name or initial; there was, -however, nothing of the kind except the name of the photographer to -be found, and so my curiosity remained unsatisfied. - -Whoever could that young man be? I wondered, and why was he so -interesting to Kitty that she carried his picture about with her, -done up and concealed with such care? It was not a brother, as I knew -that she had none. Was she engaged to be married, and was it the -likeness of her future husband? Only in that case the portrait would -be more likely to be carried openly than to be thus hidden away in -the inmost recess of her purse, as if it were a thing to be ashamed -of. - -As I mused over it, and over the desire for secrecy that seemed to be -conveyed by the place where I had found it, the thought crossed my -mind whether it could be some unacknowledged lover, whose addresses -were being paid against the wishes of her parents. Yet somehow I -could hardly fancy that to be very probable either. There was a -stateliness and haughtiness about her that gave the impression of a -person who would be most unlikely ever to condescend to anything so -mean and underhand as a clandestine love affair; she would have too -much self-respect and sense of dignity. Well! be the young man who he -might, I had no clue to his identity or to his connection with her, -and it was no use my bothering myself with vain speculations on the -subject. At all events, she would have to get a new copy of his -photograph, as I had no intention of returning the one that had -fallen into my hands. And with that reflection I dismissed the matter -from my mind, and applied myself to the more practical consideration -of what my immediate future was to be. - - - - - CHAPTER VII. - - A FEW LONDON PRICES. - - -I have not, as yet, said anything about what I meant to do on -reaching London, and how I intended to support myself; but it must -not, therefore, be supposed that I had not carefully considered, and -fully made up my mind upon that important matter. Various ways by -which a young woman in my position might earn her livelihood had -suggested themselves to me; and, after mature deliberation, I had -selected the avocations of daily-governess, shop-assistant, or -travelling-maid, as being those in which I was most likely to -succeed. - -This reduced the limits of my choice to three. For awhile I remained -uncertain to which of the three I should give the preference, but -finally came to the conclusion that the latter was the one for which -I was best fitted by my gifts--both natural and acquired. Lack of -training would, of course, make it foolish for me to think of -undertaking the place of an ordinary stay-at-home lady's-maid, but -that training was by no means so essential for a travelling Abigail. -What would be chiefly wanted for such a situation was, a knowledge of -languages, a good head, a capacity for looking after luggage, and -such abilities as would enable the maid to supply the place of -courier whenever necessary; and in all these respects I had little -fear of being capable of giving satisfaction to any employer. As far -as needlework was concerned, I could do plain sewing well enough; -and though I did not know how to make dresses, yet I anticipated -no difficulty on that score, because, as it would evidently be -unreasonable to expect a servant to have cultivated both brains and -fingers alike, therefore proficiency in an inferior art, like -dressmaking, was not to be looked for in a person who had studied the -far higher branch of knowledge--languages. And, besides that, people -did not generally want to have clothes made when they were on their -travels. - -There was another part of a lady's-maid's business which was much -more likely to be required, and of which, also, I was at present -ignorant; and that was hairdressing. But that was a deficiency which -could easily be remedied by some lessons from a good hairdresser; and -the first thing that I meant to do in London was to inquire for an -artist of this kind, and become his pupil until I had learnt from him -enough of the art to fit me for a maid's place. Of course, paying for -the lessons, and finding myself meanwhile in board and lodging, would -cost money--and expense was a consideration that was on no account to -be overlooked. But I was prepared to practise strict economy; and, -what with the contents of Kitty Mervyn's purse and my own, I had -enough to live upon for some weeks at least, and did not doubt that -my resources would hold out till I should have learnt sufficient -hairdressing for my purpose. Altogether I believed that I should make -a capital travelling-maid; and it was an occupation especially -attractive to me, because well adapted to gratify my taste for much -change and amusement. - -One thing which I did during the journey to London was to effect a -considerable change in my appearance. The more I could make myself -look unlike what I had been when I left home, the greater would be my -security against pursuit, and I did not neglect the opportunity -for doing this which was afforded by the solitude of the railway -carriage. I had not got the materials for a complete disguise, but a -good deal may be done with a different neck-wrap and pair of gloves, -and a brush, comb, needle and thread. These things I had stowed -away in my bag, and by their aid I soon contrived sufficiently to -alter my exterior to make it unlikely that I should be identified -as corresponding to any description that might be given of the -Gilbertina Trecastle who had seen off her governess at Sparkton -Station. - -By the time we reached London night had set in. As we steamed slowly -into the spacious and brilliantly lit-up terminus, the bustling, -animated scene which I beheld gave me a thrill of delight, and a -pleasant sense of having undoubtedly got away from the tranquil -duck-pond where I had been vegetating, and having entered the rushing -stream of life--a stream which tolerates none of the slimy scum and -weed that are apt to accumulate on the surface of stagnation, but -speedily washes away every vestige of them. - -I saw railway officials of various grades hurrying to and fro, and -all intent on some business or other. Loud shouts for hansoms and -fourwheelers began to echo through the glazed walls of the great -station even before the train had stopped. Porters swarmed at the -windows of carriages still in motion, jumped on to the steps, opened -the doors, commenced taking out hand-bags, wraps, umbrellas, and -similar small articles, reiterated eager exclamations of "Cab, sir? -Cab, mum? Any luggage? Where from?" etc., and vied with one another -in pressing their services upon all passengers from whom a tip was -likely to be expected. Under this head the occupants of third-class -carriages were evidently not included, and not one of the offers of -assistance that were being lavished so freely in other directions -fell to my share, as I emerged from my compartment with the bag that -contained all my goods in my hand. It was a neglect, however, which I -certainly did not wish altered under the circumstances, as the less -notice I attracted, the better was my chance of evading any enquiries -that might subsequently be made about me. - -It was too late that night to set about hunting for a lodging, but -as hotels are usually to be found in close proximity to railway -stations, I had no fear of having to go far for a bed. I was not -mistaken in this confidence. No sooner had I got into the street -than I saw just before me an immense building with the words RAILWAY -HOTEL flaring in large coloured letters upon a gas transparency over -the door; and underneath this inscription was another, in smaller -sized letters, stating that within this magnificent hotel travellers -of all classes were supplied with every comfort and luxury at -extremely moderate prices. - -Turning my steps thither, I entered through the open doors into a -large, softly-carpeted, handsomely-furnished hall, where a porter in -a gorgeous livery and sundry waiters were lounging about and talking. -To one of these I addressed myself, requesting to be shown a room -for the night, and adding that I wished it to be as inexpensive a -one as possible. My request was referred to the presiding genius -in the hall, who was an elegantly attired young lady, with the most -nonchalant expression of countenance that it was ever my fortune to -behold. She was deeply engaged in a book; but on being spoken to she -put it down, glanced at a list of rooms, rang a bell, uttered -oracularly the single word "18," then resumed her volume, and at once -became as deeply absorbed in it again as though her studies had never -been interrupted at all. - -Meanwhile, one of her satellites conducted me up innumerable stairs -to the chamber assigned to me--lowness of price and of situation -being in the usual inverse proportions. At last we arrived at No. 18, -which proved to be a room small enough to have done duty as a convent -cell, and scantily furnished with a table, a chair, a cracked and -fly-spotted little looking-glass, a washing-stand, a tiny chest of -drawers, and a short narrow bedstead, whereon was an abominably hard -and fusty-smelling mattress. - -The charge for one night's occupation of this palatial apartment was -5s., and for that sum one would have supposed that a little civility -from the hotel servants might well have been thrown into the bargain, -without there being any danger of the visitor's receiving an unfair -amount of return for the money spent. Such, however, was by no means -the opinion of the waiters and chambermaids, who were at no pains -to hide the supreme scorn with which they were inspired by the -spectacle of a traveller attempting to combine hotel-life with -economy. To their minds the two things evidently were, and ought to -be, absolutely incompatible; and I am inclined to think that they -deemed it one of the objects for which they had been put into the -world, to make that incompatibility as plainly apparent as possible. - -Fortunately for me, I was as little affected by their contempt as I -was by the indifferent quality of the accommodation provided. Neither -the nasty smell of my couch nor its hardness, nor yet the sense of -being an object of scorn to a pack of waiters and chambermaids, had -power to interfere with my repose; for I slept soundly all night, and -awoke in the morning as much refreshed as though I had tenanted the -most luxurious room imaginable. Observing a tariff of hotel prices -hanging up over the washing-stand, I proceeded to read it as soon as -I was dressed. From this document I learnt that a single cup of tea -or coffee was to be had for 6d. (would that include milk and sugar? I -wondered), and that the cost of a breakfast, consisting of tea or -coffee and bread and butter, was 1s. 6d. Not bad that, thought I, -for a place which professes to supply every comfort and luxury at -extremely moderate prices! I should rather like to know what is the -landlord's idea of _im_moderate ones. - -Paying for food at this rate was not exactly consistent with the -rigid economy which my circumstances imposed upon me, so I sallied -forth to procure breakfast elsewhere. This was not difficult to -accomplish, as there was a tidy little restaurant only two doors off, -where, for the sum of 6d., I was supplied with coffee, a good-sized -roll, and a pat of butter--all of excellent quality. The small round -table on which the food was served was destitute of a cloth, but -quite clean; and I ate my meal with as hearty a relish, and enjoyed -it every bit as much, as though it had cost 150 per cent more, and -been consumed in the sumptuous coffee-room of the hotel. - -The proprietor of the restaurant was an Italian. I was, just then, -his sole customer, and, as he did not seem particularly busy, I spoke -to him in his own language when I went to the counter to pay for my -breakfast, and asked him if he happened to know of any one who gave -lessons in hairdressing. The chance of a conversation in his native -tongue appeared to please him; for he became so communicative that I -think it would have needed but little encouragement on my part to -draw from him, there and then, the whole history of his life. With -some difficulty, however, I managed to check his confidences, and to -keep him to the point on which I required information. - -Did he know any one to teach hairdressing? He must consider a moment. -Yes, to be sure! there was his friend, Monsieur Candot, a French -_parruchiére_, who could do hair, make frisettes, plaits, puffs, -curls, wigs, everything. He was not _certain_ that Monsieur Candot -gave lessons; but thought it highly probable. - -Had Monsieur Candot much practice? I asked; because otherwise he -would not suit me, as I wished only to learn of a really high-class -and fashionable hairdresser. Then, seeing the Italian's face clouding -over at the idea of my venturing to doubt the superior talent of a -man whom he recommended and called his friend, I hastened to smooth -down his ruffled feelings by adding that I felt sure he would excuse -my asking the question, because--as he well knew--there were wigs and -wigs, and the mere fact of making them did not necessarily imply that -they were made well; that, in short, if it were permissible to take -liberties with Giusti's epigram about bookmaking, one might say-- - - "Il far' un' parrúcca è meno che niénte, - Se parrúcca fatte non piace la gente." - -This pacified the Italian's rising ire. There could be no possible -doubt, he said, of his friend's wonderful talent. Monsieur Candot was -a genuine artist, who never executed any work of art that was not -first-rate, because, if it fell short of the perfection at which he -aimed, he would destroy it unhesitatingly, and make another and more -successful one in its place. His merit was appreciated everywhere; he -was in request in the very highest circles, and made wigs "_anche per -le duchesse_." - -There was no resisting such a recommendation as this, so I procured -Monsieur Candot's address, and set off to find him. He resided in a -small street near Edgeware Road, and when I got to his abode I was -fortunate enough to find him disengaged, and to be admitted without -delay to his presence. I told him I was a maid who was anxious to -learn hairdressing, and asked if he gave lessons in that art. He -replied in the affirmative, saying also that he was constantly -having applications like mine, and that he had no doubt of being -able to make an expert _coiffeuse_ of me in about a month--however -ignorant of the matter I might now be. Was I going to take the -lessons on my own account, or was it by the wish of my mistress? - -At the time I could not conceive what was the motive of this -question; but I subsequently discovered it to be, that his price for -lessons given to a maid at her mistress's expense was nearly double -what it was when the maid paid for them out of her own pocket. I, in -my present state of life, highly approved of this practice; and, as -my answer showed me to be entitled to the benefit of the lower rate -of payment, our terms were soon arranged, and the interview came to -a satisfactory termination. - -So far, so good; and now to find myself a cheap habitation not far -from Monsieur Candot's residence. After wandering about for some time -in the neighbouring streets, I discovered a lodging that seemed -likely to be suitable. The landlady, however--either because a long -experience of lodgers had made her distrust them as a body, or else -because there was something she objected to in my appearance--did not -evince much eagerness to let her room. She hesitated and eyed me -doubtfully, demanding what was my name and occupation, and whether I -could pay a week in advance--_i.e._ fifteen shillings. - -I had already determined that, whenever I should be asked for my -name, I would adopt the abbreviation that had been bestowed upon me -in my earliest years; so I replied that I was a lady's-maid called -Caroline Jill; that I had recently left a situation; and that I did -not intend looking out for another until I had had some hairdressing -lessons. And, as I spoke, I laid upon the table the rent in advance -which she had asked for. - -There was nothing at all improbable in my story, and the sight of -the money gave her confidence, so she consented to receive me as a -lodger. I then bethought me that she would be almost sure to expect -a lady's-maid to be accompanied by at least one big box, and that her -distrust might very likely be reawakened at sight of the extremely -modest amount of luggage which I had to bring; so I mentioned, -casually, that I had left almost all my goods at home in the country, -and had only a very small bag with me, as it was so inconvenient to -be moving about with a lot of heavy things. And having thus prepared -her mind for the diminutive size of my bag, I set off to fetch it -from the hotel. - -The hairdressing lessons were not to take place till the evenings, -or late in the afternoons, so that I should be idle during the -greater part of each day; and, as I returned to the hotel, I began -considering how to employ profitably all the spare time that I should -have on my hands. Evidently the thing to suit me would be a temporary -engagement as daily-governess, as I should then be adding to my -slender stock of money even whilst paying for Candot's instructions. -I would endeavour to get such an engagement as soon as possible; and, -in order to lose no time about it, I would go straight to the hotel -reading-room, where I should be sure to find the day's newspapers, -wherein I might perhaps meet with some advertisements that it would -be worth my while to answer. - -On reaching the hotel, therefore, I turned along a passage over which -was a notice to the effect that it led to the reading-room. A waiter -outside stared at me with wrathful surprise, as if he thought that -the luxuries of that apartment were unlawful for any one badly off -for money, and that it was the height of presumption for so humble -a person as myself to attempt to enjoy them. But I knew well that -whoever stays at a hotel has a right to profit by its reading-room; -so I walked calmly in, without heeding his indignant looks. Daily -and weekly newspapers, journals, and periodicals of various kinds, -were spread on the table, and I proceeded diligently to study the -advertisements for daily governesses which they contained. It was not -every such place which would do for me, as I wanted one situated in -London, and where only morning work was required, therefore I had -some difficulty in discovering an advertisement that was at all -likely to suit. At last, however, I hit upon a couple in the _Morning -Post_ that seemed tolerably promising; and as it was too late to -think of going to apply for them on that day, I copied the addresses -for use on the morrow, and then left the room. - -As I entered the hall on my way upstairs a gentleman who had come to -call upon some one staying at the hotel was in the act of leaving his -card. It was a strange coincidence that that particular individual -should have happened to be there at the very moment when I was -passing through; for I immediately saw that he was the original of -the mysterious photograph which had been put away so snugly in Miss -Mervyn's purse, and as to which I had felt inquisitive. Surely now I -should be able to gratify my curiosity so far as to find out his -name, I thought, and, so thinking, lingered in the hall in hopes of -an opportunity for attaining that object. - -Not far from the door there were a lot of pigeon-holes for the -purpose of receiving any letters and cards that might arrive -for visitors at the hotel; and in one of these receptacles the -gentleman's card was deposited by the servant to whom he gave it. -This afforded me the chance I wanted. Pretending that I thought -there might be a letter for me, I went to the pigeon-holes and -inspected the bit of pasteboard just placed there, and thus learnt -that its owner's name was Edward Norroy, and that he was a captain -in the Fusiliers. - -Well, that was _something_ to have discovered about him, certainly, -but not very much; I had never heard the name before, and was still -as far off as ever from knowing what he and Kitty had to do with one -another, and why she should care to carry his picture about in her -pocket. It was no business of mine, of course, as I very well knew. -Yet the singular attractiveness which she had for me made me feel -more interest in her concerns than in those of the generality of -human-kind. It was strange, too, considering that I had seen her but -twice in my life, and was by no means of an impressionable nature, -nor yet particularly inquisitive. But that did not prevent me from -speculating about her to an extent at which I myself was astonished; -I had an idea that I should like to be able to observe her, and study -her character. - -Reflecting how queer it was to take so much interest in the affairs -of a person with whom I had absolutely nothing to do, and wondering -whether it did not show a tendency to reprehensible weak-mindedness, -I left the hall, and climbed up to my bedroom. I had very little -packing-up to get through, so I was soon ready to depart, and then I -rang the bell and asked for my bill. - -It might, not unreasonably, have been supposed that the 5s. which was -the price of the room I had occupied would have fully paid for all -that I had had from the hotel, and left a pretty fair margin for -profit as well. Not so, however, was the opinion of the manager; for -a tiny foot-tub and jug of water which I had used to wash myself in -on rising were dignified in the bill by the name of "bath;" and for -that, and for "attendance," an extra half-crown was tacked on to my -expenses. I had had quite enough experience of hotel bills to know -that "attendance" was an inevitable item on them, and that it was -no use grumbling at the charge. Still, I had found the article so -unusually conspicuous by its absence in the present instance, that I -could not resist the desire I felt to give a little bit of my mind on -the subject to the chambermaid who had brought me the bill, and was -now waiting for its payment. - -"What an odd thing it is," said I, gravely, "that _attendance_ and -_nothing_ should be two words that have precisely the same meaning. -Don't you think so?" - -I spoke with the utmost seriousness, and I think that she imagined -I was going to dispute the bill. "Do I think what?" she returned, -pertly; "I don't know what you're talking about." - -"Why," replied I, "if you look at this bill, you will see that -_attendance_ is charged just as if it were something extra which -had really been supplied to me; that is not the case, as you are -perfectly well aware, so the natural inference is that the word must -mean nothing, you see. Otherwise one would be obliged to suppose that -those three syllables had some special privilege attached to them -to enable hotelkeepers to rob people openly and with impunity; for -there certainly isn't any other article--such as dinner, wine, -drawing-room, etc.--which a visitor can be made to pay for if -he hasn't had it. I thought you might have been struck by the -singularity of this circumstance, but probably you are too much -accustomed to it to think it odd. Here's the money; I wish to have -the receipt as soon as possible, if you please." - -The woman coloured angrily, and looked as if she had an uncivil reply -at the tip of her tongue. Just as I finished speaking, however, a -bell rang which she was called to go and answer, so she was compelled -to deny herself the pleasure of a retort. She hurried away, muttering -something about having no time to waste in listening to all the -rubbish that fools found time to talk; and the receipted bill was -presently brought to me by another of the servants. - -Taking my little bag in my hand, I descended the stairs and bade -adieu to the grand Railway Hotel, without feeling the very slightest -inclination ever again to make proof of the accommodation which -it offered "at extremely moderate prices" to "travellers of all -classes." Yet I myself told lies unhesitatingly whenever I found -them convenient; so what right had I to complain of other people -for doing the same? - - - - - CHAPTER VIII. - - A STREET INCIDENT. - - -Before going to bed that night I wished to arrange my plans for the -next day, and to make up my mind which of the two daily-governess -situations that I had in view I would apply for first. For this -purpose I carefully compared the advertisements together to see if -either one contained anything that made it seem likely to be -preferable to the other. As, however, there did not appear to be a -pin's point to choose between them, I left the selection to chance, -and settled the question by tossing. The result of this appeal to -hazard was to decide me to try first for the place of A. G., who -required personal application to be made between noon and two o'clock -in the afternoon, at a given address somewhere in the Bayswater -district. - -It was no use going there before the hour specified, and I did -not feel in the humour to settle down to any steady occupation -till it was time to start, so I spent most of the following morning -in watching what went on in the street below my window, and making -guesses as to the characters and employments of the various -passers-by. Amongst these there was one to whom my attention was -particularly attracted. This was a little girl of about nine or ten -years old, with a basket containing some bunches of common flowers -for sale. It was quite early in the morning when first I noticed her, -and afterwards I saw her pass my window again and again; for though, -at intervals, she made excursions into other neighbouring streets, -yet after each of these excursions she returned to the one wherein -my lodging was situated. At first she looked tolerably bright -and smiling as she ran here and there, making assiduous efforts -to dispose of her stock in trade. But she was not in luck's way, -and failed to sell a single bunch; and she evidently took this -ill-success greatly to heart, for all the smiles and cheerfulness -gradually died away from her face, and she looked increasingly sad -and melancholy each time that I saw her pass. - -Presently a big coarse-looking woman, who was also selling flowers, -came into the street. She and the child met, and stopped to talk, -just opposite my window; and though I could not hear what they said, -yet their looks and gestures enabled me to make a very fair guess -at what they were talking about. The little girl, I could see, was -timidly asking some favour which the woman refused. The child, though -apparently much in awe of the other, yet seemed to screw up her -courage to urge the petition; evidently she desired very much to have -it granted, as I could see by the pitifully earnest wistfulness -expressed in her countenance, as she looked up with quivering lips, -and eyes brimful of tears. Whatever her request was, however, the -woman had no mind to grant it; and, seeming to become impatient at -the child's persistency, pushed her away roughly and left the street. -For a minute or so after her departure the little girl stood sobbing, -and looking a picture of disappointment and misery. Then, using the -corner of her shawl as a pocket-handkerchief, she dried her eyes, -blew her nose, and mournfully resumed her former occupation. - -She did not again come in sight of my window, so I saw no more of her -till it was time for me to start on my situation-hunting expedition. - -I was walking down towards Oxford Street, with my head full of my own -affairs, when I heard a shrill, quavering, little voice pipe out -close at my elbow: "Flowers, lady! bootifle fresh flowers. Won't you -please buy a bunch?" Looking down, I saw beside me the same little -girl whom I had previously been watching. The contents of her basket -were still undiminished, and she was sitting wearily on a door-step, -but now started up to offer me her wares, and try to induce me to -become a customer. Though I could do very well without flowers, yet I -liked them, and thought they would be a considerable improvement to -my dingy little lodging; besides, I pitied the child for the bad luck -she had hitherto had that morning; so altogether I had half a mind to -buy of her. But then the warning voice of prudence interfered, saying -that I had no money to waste on vanities like flowers, and that -the more I departed from my strict rule of denying myself every -superfluity, the more irksome it would be to keep to it at all. I -thought prudence was perfectly right, so I followed her counsel, and -replied to the little flower-seller; "No, thank you; I don't want -any." - -She, however, was unwilling to take a refusal, and exclaimed; "Oh, -but do _please_ 'ave some, dear lady. Sitch bootifle flowers, they -be! Jest one bunch!" - -I was not going to offend my inward monitor by disregarding her -advice, so I merely shook my head, and walked on. - -For a few steps the child trotted beside me, continuing her -importunities, but desisted when she found I was not to be moved. I -looked back to see what she was doing when I reached the corner of -the street, and saw that she had buried her face in her shawl, and -was crying bitterly. - -I was provoked at such a very unpractical proceeding; and, thinking -that at all events a word of good advice would cost me nothing to -give, and that perhaps she might be the better for it, I returned to -her, and said: "Now, you know, it's excessively silly of you to -behave like that, and you'd much better dry your eyes. You're just -as likely as not to be losing a chance of a customer while you're -crying, and you don't want to do that, do you?" - -"Oh, _indeed_ but I can't 'elp crying," she replied, between her -violent sobs; "it's cos I'se so 'ungry--so dreffle 'ungry." - -"What makes you so hungry?" said I. "Didn't you have enough -breakfast?" - -"I 'asn't 'ad none at all," she returned. "When mother sent me out -this mornin', she said as I shouldn't 'ave no brexshus till I'd got -the money for it with these 'ere flowers; and she telled me the same -a bit ago, when I met 'er and axed 'er to let in 'ave a penny to buy -suthun to eat, cos no one wouldn't buy none of the flowers, and I was -jest starved. She sez as it's all my fault for not selling' of 'em, -and that if I wasn't idle, I could get rid of 'em fast enuff. But -that's not true, for I'se done my best--indeed I 'as!" - -It really did seem a hard case. I knew, from personal observation, -that the charge of idleness was undeserved, and it was very unfair to -make the poor little thing suffer for a slackness of trade which she -could not help. To keep a growing child running about all the morning -in the open air without giving it a morsel of food to appease its -hunger till nearly twelve o'clock, was a piece of barbarity that -quite shocked me. For, however hard I may be by nature, and however -apt to drive my own barrow through the world without troubling myself -about the toes that happen to be in the way and to get pinched, yet I -do not think I have ever been guilty of gratuitous cruelty to either -man or beast; indeed, the mere sight of it always fills me with -disgust. - -The mention of breakfast gave me a sudden bright idea of how to -assist the child without laying myself open to the reproaches of -prudence. Had I not saved a shilling the day before by breakfasting -at the restaurant instead of at the hotel? and was not a penny saved -a penny gained? I had never calculated on being able to begin gaining -anything as yet, so that that shilling was an addition to my funds -which I had not reckoned upon, and which I was clearly entitled to -regard as an extra--a thing that I could throw away or do what I -pleased with--an accidental item which need not be entered on my -receipts at all, so that prudence had no right to expect to be -consulted as to what was done with it. And, feeling quite certain of -the soundness of this argument, I did not wait to hear whether -prudence took the same view of the matter or not, but instantly -presented the coin to the child, recommending her to spend part of it -now in getting breakfast, and to reserve the remainder against some -future emergency. - -The sight and feel of the shilling checked her tears with surprising -quickness, and her wan, melancholy, little physiognomy brightened up -wonderfully. Holding her basket towards me, she offered either to let -me pick out the best flowers for myself, or else to do it for me if I -liked; adding, with a slight hesitation, that perhaps there _might_ -be one or two old flowers since yesterday that had got mixed among -this morning's lot, and if so, she would be more likely to know the -fresh ones than I should. The touch of confusion with which this was -said, made me suspect that the contents of her basket were by no -means so fresh as she professed them to be, and that she, being well -aware of that fact, was moved by an impulse of gratitude to proffer -her services as chooser in order that I might not be cheated. - -Evidently it would be prudent to accept her offer if I wanted to have -anything out of her basket. But that was just what I felt rather -doubtful about doing. I had intended the shilling as a free gift, and -had had no idea of receiving anything in return; besides that, it -would be a nuisance to have a handful of flowers to carry about with -me, and they would probably have begun to fade by the time I got -home; so, altogether, I at first thought I would refuse them. On -second thoughts, however, I changed my mind. The flowers would -certainly brighten up my room, and I knew that I should like them if -I could have them transported there without trouble; and, after -all, it was just as well to have some value for one's money; and -as she took it for granted that I should do so, there would be no -disappointment to her in my having them. I said therefore-- - -"Will you pick me out a couple of good, fresh bunches, take them to a -house that is not far off, and leave them there, with a message that -Miss Caroline Jill wishes to have them put in water till she comes -back?" - -"'Iss, lady," she answered; "I'll pick you the werry bestest and -freshest as I 'as--and thank you kindly for what you've give me. -What's the 'ouse as I'm to take 'em to?" - -I gave her the address of my lodging, and then we separated; she -disappearing into the nearest baker's shop, and I continuing my way -to A. G. My experience of life had not given me enough confidence in -human nature to make me think it very likely that a street child was -to be relied upon to keep a promise; and consequently I thought it -highly problematical that I should find any flowers awaiting me on my -return. But yet I did not the least regret the shilling I had thrown -away upon her. It was a satisfaction to think that her hunger was -being appeased, at any rate; indeed, if I had not known that that had -been done, I should have exposed myself to the risk of feeling -uncomfortable whenever I thought of her ravenous condition all day. -So I had evidently acted for my own interest as well as hers. - - - - - CHAPTER IX. - - A NERVOUS LADY. - - -One of the numerous omnibuses running down Oxford Street deposited me -pretty near where I wanted to go; and, after alighting, I had no -difficulty in finding some one to direct me to the address I was in -search of. This proved, to my surprise, to be a small greengrocer's -shop, where one would certainly not expect that there would be any -demand for a governess. However, it was unmistakably the address that -had been given in the advertisement, so I edged my way in, past the -piles of earthy baskets by which the entrance was almost choked, and -spoke to the owner of the shop--a jolly-looking, burly, middle-aged -man. - -"Excuse my troubling you," said I, politely, "but I've called in -consequence of an advertisement for a daily governess by A. G. in -yesterday's _Morning Post_. Is this the right place?" And as I spoke -it flashed across my mind whether perhaps the initials in the -advertisement represented the words "a greengrocer." - -As soon as the man heard the object of my visit, his face twinkled -with amusement in a way that seemed to imply there must be some -capital joke connected with the affair. "Oh yes, Miss," he answered, -"this be the right place, sure enough! P'raps you b'ain't used to -greengrocers as rekvires daily-guvnesses vere you comes from--be you -now?" - -The man looked so perfectly good-tempered that it was impossible to -take offence at his enjoyment of the unknown joke, and I laughed as I -replied, "No, I can't say that we do often have that happen." - -"Ah, well, so I thought," he returned, chuckling. "And that just -brings us to the werry pint as 'as to be considered in this 'ere -bizness. That is--no offence my askin'--but vere _do_ you come from, -Miss?" - -I told him the address of my lodging. - -"'Ealthy districk, Miss, is it?" he enquired. - -"Yes, as far as I know," replied I, feeling rather astonished at the -question, and reflecting that my assertion was a perfectly safe one, -seeing that I knew nothing whatever about the matter. - -"Any illness in the 'ouse, Miss?" he continued, holding -up his fingers and checking off on them the name of each -successive disease as he enumerated it; "any fivver, diptheery, -coleera, measles, mumps, small-pox, chicking-pox, 'oopin'-corf, -nettle-rash--that's only nine; there's a tenth as I was to ax -about, I knows; what the juice was it now? Oh yes! the one as is a -flower and a colour--yaller-rose--rose-yaller! Dashed if I can say -it right." - -"Is roseola the word you want?" I suggested. - -"_That's_ it, Miss, thanky!" he exclaimed joyfully, but without -venturing on a second attempt at pronouncing the word; "now, be there -any of these 'ere as I've mentioned at the 'ouse vere you're livin'? -or any other infexshus complaint as I 'aven't mentioned, as p'raps -may be some bran new invention of the doctors since the old list was -made out?" - -I had never thought of making any inquiries of the kind at my -lodging, so I answered "no" boldly. Even if there were any illness, -at all events I did not know of it, so my negative was obviously not -to be considered as wilfully misleading, whatever the state of -sanitary affairs might be. "Werry good," he returned; "then if you'll -be so good as go round the corner of the street over the vay, you'll -find yourself in Fairy Avenue, and at No. 114 you'll find A. G., -that's to say, Mrs. Green. You see she's mortial afeard of what she -calls jurms, and's allers thinking as strange people's sure to have -'em in their pockets or their clothes, or some-veres about 'em, ready -to turn loose on whoever they meets. So when she adwertizes for a -guvness or a servant, she mostly axes me to let 'em come 'ere fust, -that I may make sure as they don't come from no infexshus place afore -they goes to 'er 'ouse. Did you ever 'ear of sitch a ridiklus fancy -'afore in all your born days? It makes me fit to split with larfin -sometimes. But there! it ain't but werry little trouble to me, and I -don't mind oblidgin' a good customer like 'er, as takes a sight of -wedgebuttles and fruits and sitch things. 'I considers 'em pertickler -'olesome artikles of dite,' sez she to me often. 'So do I too, mum,' -sez I back to 'er. And good reason vy I _should_ inkcourage the -notion, seein' as she buys 'em all from me!" - -Thanking the man for his information, and feeling that I had gained -an insight into Mrs. Green's character which might come useful to me -in my dealings with her, I proceeded to 114 Fairy Avenue. On ringing -the bell and saying that I had come about the governess' situation, I -was requested to wait in the hall, whilst the servant went to see if -Mrs. Green was disengaged. - -It was very evident that that lady took care no one should enter her -doors without undergoing some amount of fumigation, as in the middle -of the hall there stood a sort of small brazier, wherein some kind of -disinfecting compound was smouldering, and sending out light curls of -smoke which impregnated the air with a sickly smell. By the odour of -this smoke, combined with that of carbolic acid, the whole house was -pervaded, as the floors were scrubbed with carbolic soap twice a week -regularly, and carbolic acid was freely applied to whatever incoming -thing could, by any stretch of imagination, be regarded as a possible -medium for the introduction of those "germs of disease" which Mrs. -Green held in horror. In the efficacy of any inodorous disinfectant -she had no belief at all. How, she would say, could stuff that was -not strong enough to be perceptible to the nose be strong enough to -be relied on to purify the atmosphere, and affect any germs that -might be floating about in it? Don't tell _her_ to use a thing like -Cordy's fluid, that had not any smell at all! No, give her carbolic -acid or chloride of lime, which made difference enough in the air for -one's nose to take cognisance of--then there could be no mistake -about their presence, and one could feel satisfied. - -She did not admit in to her room till she had sent the servant back -to inquire whether I had been to the greengrocer's and been forwarded -to her by him. My answer being satisfactory, I was ushered into her -sitting-room and invited to take a seat near the door, and a good way -off from herself. We then proceeded to talk business, and I found -that she wanted a governess to come every morning to instruct and -take charge of her little girl of ten years old, and that the amount -of knowledge necessary to satisfy her demands was not beyond the -limits of my acquirements. Having discovered this much I lost no time -in asking what salary she gave, for I did not want her to anticipate -this question by asking me how much I expected to receive, as the -fact was that I had not an idea of what daily governesses were -generally paid, and feared exposing my ignorance. The terms she -offered were so far beyond what I had thought likely, that I was -delighted, and at once determined not to let slip the situation if -I could help it. Consequently I became very anxious to ingratiate -myself with her, and looked out for an opportunity of doing so by -manifesting sympathy with the dread of infection which I knew to be a -weak point of hers. For if people have any specially absurd craze, -they are sure to regard an indication of the same mania on the part -of another person as a strong recommendation and reason for thinking -well of that person. I had not long to wait for the opportunity I -desired, as she said; "There is one thing I must tell you, Miss Jill, -and that is, that I insist upon every member of my establishment, -without exception, conforming to the regulations I make in order to -guard against the introduction of infection to the house. Should you -be prepared to do this?" - -"Most certainly," I replied, though in truth I had no intention -of troubling my head about the matter more than I had done -heretofore--that is to say, not at all. "I shall be only too glad to -do so. For I must confess that on that point I am what some people -call quite foolishly nervous." - -"It is _impossible_ to be too nervous about it," she returned, "and I -am glad to find that you have a proper appreciation of the necessity -of a carefulness which is a duty no less to society than to one's -self and one's family. A fresh case of illness means the setting up -of a fresh manufactory of horrible, insidious, deadly germs of -disease, which, once set going in the world, cannot be recalled, and -can only with difficulty be destroyed. How many deaths might not be -caused by germs made in and issuing from this house, if we were to -have some infectious illness here? And if the illness had been -admitted through any negligence of mine, should not I be responsible -for all of those deaths?" - -"Quite true," answered I, gravely. "I never was struck by that -before, but I see how unanswerably correct your reasoning is. How I -wish that every one else had an equally sensitive conscience!" - -"Yes, it is indeed sad," she replied, sighing, "to see what an amount -of culpable carelessness and foolhardiness exists in the world! I do -my best to make these things appear in their true light, but it is -not often that I can succeed in inspiring my own spirit of prudence -into any one else. I assure you that I have even heard of my -precautions being laughed at and called ridiculous." - -I kept my countenance heroically; and as she paused, as though -expecting me to make some remark, I exclaimed, "It seems hardly -credible!" - -"So one would have thought," she returned sadly, "and especially in -the face of the outbreak of scarlet fever which has recently occurred -in so many parts of London, and which every one must have read of in -the papers. However, to return to business. Will you kindly let me -have the address of your last situation? Should the answer to my -inquiries there prove satisfactory, I shall be glad to engage you, -as, from what I have seen of you, I have every reason to think you -will suit me." - -Now, of course, I had foreseen that no one would be likely to engage -me without knowing (or supposing themselves to know, which would come -to the same thing) something about who I was, and I foresaw also that -it might be against me not to be able to give the name of any one who -could be inquired of about me, either personally or by letter. To -meet this difficulty I had concocted a story which would, I hoped, be -accepted as a sufficient explanation of the matter. But I had never -dreamt of any one's being so absurdly afraid of infection as Mrs. -Green was; and the discovery of her foible inspired me with the -brilliant idea of offering her a personal reference which she would -be certain not to avail herself of. - -I replied, therefore, that as I had been a little out of sorts I had -been living quietly at home for the last six months, in order to -regain my health, and that I had been previously teaching in the -family of Mr. Thomson--mentioning the name of a clergyman in the east -of London whose parish I remembered having read about not long before -in a newspaper as being pretty nearly decimated by scarlet fever. -This gentleman, I said, had been most kind to me, having not only -given me a written testimonial to character, but also promised that -he would at any time write to, or see, any person on my behalf. I -only hoped, I put in parenthetically, that he was not overworking -himself in the terrible visitation of scarlet fever that had lately -come upon his parish; but he was such an excellent man, and so -indefatigable in his labours amongst the poor, that I feared it was -but too likely he would sacrifice himself to them. If anything should -happen to him I should feel I had lost one of my best friends. But, -however busy he might be, I felt sure he would keep his promise, and -would certainly find time to answer any inquiries that Mrs. Green -might wish to make about me, whether in person or by post. - -She, however, would as soon have thought of walking into a blazing -furnace as into Mr. Thomson's parish in its then condition, and, as -I expected, thought epistolary communication with him was but little -less perilous. - -"Ahem!" she answered, "I am afraid Mr. Thomson is not a very easy -person to refer to just at present, and I do not quite see how it is -to be managed. I could not _think_ of going to see him, and I am -doubtful that it would be prudent to write to him either, especially -since he is so devoted to his parishioners, as you say. Men of that -kind are almost invariably careless about proper precautions. Perhaps -he would write me an answer when actually in a sick-room; and then -imagine how that letter, full of contagion, would be mixed in the -post with other letters, impart to them its fatal properties, and -thus scatter sickness and, perhaps, death far and wide! No, never -will _I_ wilfully run the risk of causing disasters in this way, -whatever other people may do." - -"I have the testimonial he wrote me at the time I discontinued -teaching in his family, if you would think that sufficient, madam," I -replied, beginning to fumble in my pocket as though in search of the -document in question. Of course I had no such thing about me in -reality, but I knew that I could easily pretend to have forgotten it, -and then write a sham one and send it by post. - -She raised her hand hastily to check my producing the paper. "Wait -one moment," she cried, looking somewhat uneasy. "How long is it -since the testimonial was written?" - -"Just six months ago," answered I. - -"Was there any fever or infectious illness in the parish at that -time?" she inquired. - -"Not that I am aware of," I returned. - -"Still it might have been there without your knowledge, might it -not?" she continued. - -I allowed that this was not impossible, but added that I did not -believe the district to have been at all unhealthy then. - -"What makes me anxious for certainty about this," she said, "is, -that supposing Mr. Thomson had visited some sick person just before -writing your testimonial, he would have probably had germs of -disease clinging to him; and those germs, being communicated to the -writing-paper, would be lingering there still, and be a source of -peril to whoever comes in contact with that piece of paper. Possibly, -however, you have taken the precaution of disinfecting it by -fumigation, or in some other way?" - -"No, I have not," I answered; "I am ashamed to say that I did not -think of it--a most reprehensible omission on my part!" - -"Ah, well," she replied, with an air of indulgence, "it was an -oversight, no doubt; but then you are still very young, and one can -hardly expect young people to be as thoughtful as old ones. But we -will remedy the omission at once. There is some disinfecting powder -in that square box on the table beside you. I shall be obliged if you -will sprinkle it thoroughly over the paper before giving it me to -read." - -I recommenced feeling in my pocket, and then exclaimed, "Oh how very -stupid of me! I made sure that I had brought that testimonial with -me, but I must have left it on my table, as I find I have not got it -after all. Will you allow me to post it to you as soon as I get home? -Should you think it satisfactory, and write me word when you wish me -to commence my duties, I will come at whatever time you appoint." - -The look of relief that came over her face on hearing that I had not -got the testimonial showed me that she regarded it with considerable -distrust, and was not greatly desirous of touching it. - -"Yes, you can post it to me as you propose," she said; "and I will -let you know my decision by letter also. Of course you will disinfect -the paper carefully before sending it. I shall be glad if you will -take some of this powder for the purpose, as it is a disinfectant on -which I can rely thoroughly, and has so strong a smell that if you -were to forget to use it, my nose would immediately inform me of that -fact, and I should be thus warned against opening the paper. By the -by, in the event of my engaging you, should you be likely to continue -the engagement for any length of time? or to break it off again -shortly? My reason for asking is, that I am most averse to constant -changes in my establishment, because that means constant fresh risk -of infection from strangers; and therefore I prefer not entering into -an engagement with any one who likes to be perpetually moving about -from place to place." - -It will be remembered that my intention was merely to take a -governess's place temporarily, to eke out my means till I had learnt -hairdressing and could get a travelling-maid's situation. But I -really did not see that she had a right to expect me to confide all -my private little schemes to her, so I said nothing about this, and -only assured her that I had a horror of perpetual changes, and that -a permanent situation was exactly what I was hoping to find. - -"There is one thing more that I forgot to mention," she continued. -"I should object to your making use of an omnibus or train-car in -coming to give my daughter her daily lessons. I consider public -conveyances of that kind most unsafe, on account of their liability -to contain germs of disease left by some one or other of the great -variety of passengers who travel in them." - -"I quite agree with you," I answered, "and hardly ever go in one of -those conveyances on that account. I should hope to come here on foot -as a rule; and if the weather should make that impossible, I should -take a hansom, as being the least dangerous vehicle available." - -I felt I was pretty safe in making this promise, though I meant to -come by omnibus all the same. There was not much chance of her -inspecting the passengers in the numerous omnibuses running down -Oxford Street and the Bayswater Road; and they did not pass up Fairy -Avenue, so I should have no choice about walking the last part of my -journey. Thus she would see me arrive daily on foot; her mind would -be at ease; I should be perfectly free to use the convenient omnibus -as much as I chose; and so we should both be happy. - -Everything being settled, I took leave of her, and had reached the -door of the room to go, when she spoke again. "On the whole, Miss -Jill," she said, "I do not think I need trouble you to send me that -testimonial. From what I have seen of you, I have very little doubt -that we shall suit each other; and I feel satisfied to engage you at -once, as the peculiar circumstances of the case render it impossible -to hold any communication with the person who is your reference. Can -you begin the lessons to-morrow morning at nine o'clock?" - -"Certainly, madam," I replied; "you may depend upon my being here -then, and I am much obliged to you." - -Who would have thought that a letter six months old could have -inspired her with so much fear as to induce her to dispense with -every shadow of precaution about ascertaining the character of an -individual to whose care she was willing to commit her child? - -Marvelling greatly at her folly, and congratulating myself on my -success, I returned to my lodging, where I found that the little girl -of whom I had bought the flowers, had duly left them for me. It was -more than I had expected her to do, certainly; and the only way I -could account for such astonishing honesty was by supposing that no -one else had wanted to buy them, so that there had been no temptation -to her to break her promise and defraud me of my nosegay. But I -believe I judged her with too much cynicism; for, long afterwards, -she proved that she had been really grateful for the breakfast I had -given her, and was anxious to show her gratitude in deeds. - - - - - CHAPTER X. - - CHANGE OF SITUATION. - -I was naturally rather curious to know how my family would take the -discovery of my flight, and for some time afterwards I used to look -in the newspapers with a half-expectation of seeing a paragraph -headed "Mysterious disappearance of a young lady;" or else an offer -of a reward for information concerning me; or else, perhaps (but this -I considered as being merely _possible_, and not at all _likely_), an -entreaty to me to return, and all should be forgiven. As nothing of -the kind appeared, however, I perceived that my relatives had the -good sense to understand the wisdom of washing their dirty clothes at -home, and that they did not intend to draw a needless amount of -attention to the fact that I had run away from them. It was -inevitable that my having done so would be a nine day's wonder and -topic of gossip in the immediate neighbourhood of Castle Manor; but -it did not follow that our domestic want of harmony need be -proclaimed to all the world and his wife also; and so the matter -was not published in the papers. - -Mrs. Green's little girl Fanny, to whom I was engaged to give -instruction, was heavy and uninteresting enough to have driven -well-nigh distracted any governess who cared about shoving on her -pupils, and deriving credit from them; so it was lucky that I was -less energetic and devoted to my work. As it was for only a very -brief period that I meant to superintend Fanny's studies, it was -perfectly immaterial to me whether she progressed in them or not; -and I did not attempt to teach her anything beyond what was to be -got into her head without much trouble--which limitation reduced our -educational labours to a surprisingly small compass. Her stupidity -did not prevent us from getting on together most harmoniously; for -though I did not do much towards increasing her stock of knowledge, -yet I atoned for that deficiency by opening her mind with an amount -of general and varied entertainment with which no previous governess -had ever provided her. Sometimes I told her any marvellous stories -that I knew, adding touches, as I went on, to heighten the interest -of whatever parts seemed to astonish her especially. Or else I would -say or do something extravagantly absurd, just as gravely as though -it were the most matter-of-fact speech or action possible, and amuse -myself by watching the look of absolute bewilderment that would come -over her face at first, and speculating on how long an interval would -elapse before it would be followed by the succeeding grin which -betokened that her slowly-working brain had at last awakened to -the fact of there being a joke afoot. By such methods as these I -contrived to find amusement for both myself and her, and I have very -little doubt that she approved of me highly, and regarded me as being -far and away the pleasantest teacher she had ever had to do with. - -That portion of my time which was not occupied either in giving or -receiving lessons I spent chiefly in attending to the necessities of -my wardrobe, loafing about in the parks and streets, and doing -whatever sight-seeing was to be had gratuitously. I did not indulge -in any amusement costing money, except theatres, to which I allowed -myself a few visits as a treat and reward for my self-denial in -other respects--theatrical performances being a form of entertainment -to which I have always been particularly partial. - -Thus three or four weeks passed quickly away, and by the end of that -time I had mastered the art of hairdressing sufficiently to enable me -to undertake the duties of a lady's-maid; for I was far more -industrious in the capacity of pupil than in that of teacher, and -laboured a great deal more zealously to profit by M. Candot's -instructions than I did to make Fanny Green profit by mine. It is -wonderful how much easier it is to take trouble when one wishes to -secure value for money spent, than it is when the object of one's -exertions is merely to give an equivalent for money received! - -Having qualified myself for the calling I meant to adopt, the next -thing was to take steps to hear of a situation; and to that end I put -an advertisement in the _Times_, _Morning Post_, and _Guardian_, -offering C. J.'s services to any lady going abroad who required a -thoroughly efficient maid, capable of acting as courier if necessary. -This notice bore fruit speedily in the shape of a note addressed to -C. J., which I found awaiting me on my return from Mrs. Green's one -afternoon, and which ran as follows:-- - - "2000 EATON SQUARE, _Thursday_. - - "Lady Mervyn writes in answer to C. J.'s advertisement, as she - wishes to meet with a good travelling-maid. Lady Mervyn will be - glad if C. J. will call at her house to-morrow evening at 5.30 - _punctually_." - -How strange that my notice should happen to have been seen and -answered by Lady Mervyn--a person between whom and myself there was a -remote connection, and whom I had met years ago when I was a child! -Would it be safe for me to enter her service? or should I be running -too great a risk of recognition? No, I did not think I need be -afraid. Kitty was the only one of the family who was at all likely to -remember me, as I had been much more in her company than in theirs on -the occasion of our previous meeting at Lugano. And that she had no -recollection of me I had already proved at Sparkton Station; which -forgetfulness on her part, by the by, I did not now feel the least -bit inclined to resent, having quite got over the little soreness and -irritation which it had caused me at the moment. - -Yes; I believed I should be as safe from discovery at Lady Mervyn's -as anywhere else, and determined that I would take the situation. I -was pleased with the idea of being under the same roof as Kitty -Mervyn, on account of the opportunities which I should then have of -observing this girl, whose character had interested me and excited -my curiosity. And then, too, I might reasonably look forward to -discovering some explanation of her having chosen to keep Captain -Edward Norroy's photograph hidden away in her purse as she had -done. A _carte-de-visite_ is ordinarily stuck into an album, and -I wanted to know why she should have treated this particular _carte_ -differently to that of any other acquaintance. - -These anticipations were checked by the sudden recollection that I -was counting my chickens before they were hatched; that I had not yet -got the place I was looking forward to; and that perhaps Lady Mervyn -might not think fit to engage me after all. When did she say I was to -go there? Looking again at the note I saw that it was dated the day -before. Yesterday was Thursday, and to-day Friday, so I must wait -upon her ladyship this very same afternoon, and had no time to lose -in providing myself with that necessary article--a character. - -About two months before there had died a certain Lady Brown, who was -rather a well-known person on account of her having lived much abroad -and published a large number of books containing her experiences of -the Riviera, the Dolomites, the Alps, the Rhine, and other foreign -places. Her husband, Sir Bartholomew Brown, had gone to the East -since her death, and was supposed to be wandering about somewhere in -Persia at the present moment. As, therefore, no reference was -possible to either the deceased Lady Brown or her husband, and as -they had been childless, it occurred to me that if I asserted myself -to have been her maid up to the time of her death, there was no one -to disprove the statement. Accordingly, I indited a character -purporting to be written by Sir Bartholomew, wherein it was set forth -that Caroline Jill had been for two years in his late wife's service; -had only left on account of that lady's death; had given entire -satisfaction during the whole time of her service; was a first-rate -traveller; and was a trustworthy, sober, steady, exemplary, and -in-all-ways-to-be-recommended-maid. - -I wasted several sheets of paper over this composition before I could -please myself; and when I had succeeded in getting it to my mind I -copied it out in a feigned hand--bold, rather scrawling, legible, and -masculine-looking. Of course there was a danger of the forgery being -detected, if Lady Mervyn should happen to be acquainted with Sir -Bartholomew's handwriting. But then it was quite likely that she was -_not_; and I would try to find out if she knew him before I produced -the character; and, even if the worst came to the worst, the chances -were that she would not take the trouble to prosecute me, and -I should have just as good a prospect as before of obtaining a -situation with some one else. - -By the time my preparations were completed it was later than I -thought, and as the underlining of the word "punctually" in the note -made me think it important not to be late, I started off in such a -hurry that I tumbled downstairs and bruised myself unpleasantly. -However, I did not stay to doctor my hurts then, but hurried on, and -arrived at my destination just as the Eaton Square Church clock was -striking half-past five. - -It then appeared that my fear of being late had been quite -uncalled-for, and that I might have spared myself the bruises which -my haste had caused me, for Lady Mervyn had not yet returned from -driving. The fact was she had followed the usual plan of fashionable -ladies and gentlemen, who, when they make an appointment with an -inferior, take care that they themselves shall not be kept waiting, -but do not the least object to inflicting that annoyance on the other -party. No doubt such people consider that the time of a servant, -tradesman, farmer, or poor person is much less valuable than their -own, and a thing of so little importance that it may be wasted at -pleasure. - -On stating the object of my visit, and that Lady Mervyn had directed -me to call at that time, I was told to sit down and wait till she -came in. It was past 6 o'clock when she returned, and even then she -did not send for me immediately, but delayed doing so till she had -leisurely examined the cards that had been left for her whilst she -was out, refreshed herself with a cup of tea, and written a couple of -notes. Having accomplished these things, she at last gave orders for -me to be shown into her presence. - -She was about middle height, slightly made, and aristocratic looking. -As she was rather short-sighted she wore a _pince-nez_, and this she -put up, and coolly stared at me through, as soon as I entered the -room. After a prolonged survey she dropped it, but had recourse to it -again several times during the interview, always putting it up with -an air of having suddenly bethought her of some feature, limb, -or other part of me which she had hitherto omitted to study -sufficiently, and at which she wanted to have another good look. I -must say I thought that she used the _pince-nez_ in a manner which -would have been considered intolerably rude if it had been directed -at any one in her own rank of life; but then she regarded a servant -as being a different sort of animal from herself, and would have -laughed at the idea of a maid's not liking to be stared at as if she -were made of wood or stone, instead of flesh and blood. - -She began by inquiring my name and age; to which I replied that I was -called Caroline Jill; and that I was just twenty-two. For, though my -real age was eighteen, yet I thought that that seemed rather too -young for a person representing herself as having been a lady's-maid -for the last two years, and that therefore I had better give myself -credit for a few more years than I was actually entitled to. - -"Twenty-two!" she repeated; "you don't look your age. I should not -have thought you so old as that. How long were you in your last -situation? and what was the cause of your leaving?" - -"I was there two years, and I only left on account of the lady's -death," I replied. "Did your ladyship know the late Lady Brown?" - -She shook her head. - -"Perhaps your ladyship may have heard of her," I continued; "she -was the wife of Sir Bartholomew Brown, and used to write books -sometimes?" - -"Oh yes; I did not know her, but I know who you mean now," answered -Lady Mervyn; "was hers your last place?" - -"Yes," I replied, feeling that the ground was safe, and that I might -produce my false testimonial. "Ever since her death, two months ago, -Sir Bartholomew has been away from England; but, before going, he -kindly gave me a character, for fear of my having any difficulty -about getting another situation through there being no one from my -last place for me to refer to. Here is what he wrote. He was good -enough to tell me, when last I saw him, that he considered me to be -the best maid his wife had ever had to travel with, and that I did -just as well as a courier." - -So saying I handed over my forgery to Lady Mervyn, who perused it -carefully, and then returned it to me. - -"I always prefer a personal reference if possible," she said; -"but perhaps I might consent to dispense with it for once, in an -exceptional case like this, where it evidently cannot be had. -Certainly Sir Bartholomew speaks of you in very high terms. I do not -want you for myself, but for one of my daughters, who is going abroad -with my sister, Mrs. Rollin. You would have to attend partly on Mrs. -Rollin also; but she will not want much done for her, as she does not -care about a maid's assistance in most things. As they do not intend -taking a courier, they must have a really efficient travelling-maid, -who can see to their luggage, take tickets, and all that sort of -thing. I suppose you have had plenty of experience in that way with -Lady Brown? Can you talk French and German pretty easily?" - -I replied in the affirmative, that I also knew Italian, Spanish, a -little Dutch, and a few words of Greek, and that I could keep -accounts in some foreign coins. - -"En verité, vous ne vous vantez pas mal!" she returned, looking -insultingly sceptical as to my accomplishments being as extensive as -I claimed them to be. "Voyons d'abord pour le français." And she then -continued the conversation in French, whilst I replied in the same -tongue. The question of wages was propounded next. I had no intention -of depreciating my value by demanding too little for my services, and -I knew that courier-maids were always paid very high, so I said that -I should not like to take less than what I had received from Lady -Brown, which was £35 and all found. That was very high Lady Mervyn -said; still, she would not object to give it to a maid who was really -worth it. After a few more questions she observed that my French was -satisfactory, at all events; and that, as she was not herself a very -good German scholar, she would get her eldest daughter to test my -proficiency in that line. Ringing the bell she told the footman, who -answered it, to request Miss Mervyn to come to her. When that young -lady arrived her mother desired her to find out how I talked German. -As I came triumphantly out of her examination, and also translated -accurately an Italian quotation which happened to be in one of the -newspapers lying on the table, Lady Mervyn's incredulity as to my -accomplishments evidently diminished. I could see that she began to -think my pretensions to knowledge were better founded than she had at -first supposed them to be, and that she was now inclined to take upon -trust the skill in foreign moneys, and in Spanish, Dutch, and Greek, -to which I laid claim. - -She hesitated, considered and reconsidered, and scrutinised me -through the _pince-nez_ for some time before she could make up her -mind whether to engage me or not, and finally decided to do so. Mrs. -Rollin and Miss Mervyn were going abroad in another ten days, she -said, and as it would be well for them and me to have a few days at -home in which to get used to one another before starting on our -travels, she wished me to return to her house and begin my engagement -on that day week. This I was quite ready to do, as I had no doubt of -quickly getting free from Mrs. Green whenever I chose. - -One thing which I had evolved during the conversation with Lady -Mervyn was a grievous disappointment to me; and that was, that I was -not--at all events for a while--to become a member of her own -establishment. I had been confidently reckoning on being brought near -Kitty; but it appeared that this was not to be my destiny after all, -unless, by some piece of luck, she should chance to be the daughter -who was to accompany Mrs. Rollin, and whose especial attendant I was -to be. My mind was set at rest on this point before I left Lady -Mervyn's room, for, just as I was about to depart, she exclaimed, -"Wait a moment! I forgot that the young lady whom you will wait on -may like to see you if she is at home. Perhaps, however, she is not, -as she was to dine out early to-night before going to the theatre. -Has Kitty started yet, do you know?" she continued, turning to the -daughter who had been experimenting on my German. - -"Yes," was the answer; "she went ten minutes ago, just before I came -to you." - -"Ah, never mind then, Jill; you can go now," returned Lady Mervyn. -Whereupon I took myself off, mightly pleased at having discovered -that the Miss Mervyn whom I was to serve was just the one whom I -wanted it to be. - -The next thing was to terminate my engagement with Mrs. Green, and -I meant to make her do this herself. For this purpose I informed her -next morning that I was sorry to say that I found the daily walk to -her house was more than I could manage, therefore I must ask her to -permit me to come by omnibus in future. - -She replied (as I had felt very sure she would do) that she could not -on any account consent to expose herself and her household to such a -risk of infection. Could I not change my residence, and come to live -nearer her house? I answered that I did not wish to do that, as I -was quite comfortable in my lodging, and should probably have a -difficulty in finding another to suit me equally well. - -She returned that it was most annoying, and that in that case there -was no choice but to conclude our connection together. That would -necessitate her looking out for another governess, which she greatly -disliked doing because there was always _some_ danger of infection -from strangers coming to the premises, notwithstanding all the -precautions she could take. She would never have engaged me if she -had thought there was a chance of the engagement lasting so short a -time; but I had seemed so anxious for a permanent place that she -thought I was as averse to constant changes as she was herself. -However, there was no help for it if I declined to change my abode, -for it was out of the question for her to allow any one coming daily -to her house to make use of an omnibus. - -Poor woman! I think she would have had a fit if she had known that -I had done that very thing day after day since I had been teaching -her child; and she was certainly an excellent illustration of the -truth of the old proverb, "Where ignorance is bliss 'tis folly to -be wise." Yet I don't think she was very singular in this after -all. How many of us are there--especially of those who are heads of -houses--whose peace of mind might not be considerably disturbed if -we did but know the extent to which other people are in the habit of -setting at naught and ignoring some particular pet prejudice of our -own? - -It amused me to affect deep sympathy with a piece of folly which I -was laughing at in my sleeve all the time; so I replied that I fully -recognised the truth of what she said, and that I was truly grieved -to be the means of exposing her to fresh peril from germs of disease -clinging to the clothes of applicants for my situation; but that -since _she_ objected to my coming by a 'bus, and _I_ objected to -leave my present lodging, there was unfortunately no option about my -ceasing to instruct Fanny. - -She sighed, and answered that she was afraid that was true. At the -same time, she could not in justice omit to say that she considered -me to have behaved very well in at once telling her honestly of my -inability to continue to attend to my duties without travelling by -that dangerous conveyance which she had expressly prohibited me from -using. She feared there were some people who would have been less -straightforward, and who would, in such a case, have slily disobeyed -her, and endeavoured to conceal from her what they were doing. But -then no one was likely to be guilty of such unprincipled conduct as -that whose views were as sound as she knew mine to be on the subject -of infection! Could I go on coming to her house as before for a few -days longer? If so she would be very glad, as, perhaps, by then she -might be able to hear of a successor for me. But if the walk was too -far for me to manage, why, of course, the engagement must come to an -end at once, as she could not consent to my coming by omnibus for -even one single day. - -To this I made answer, with perfect truth, that I should be most -happy to go on coming in the same way as I had hitherto done till the -following Thursday. After that, however, I could undertake it no -longer, and supposed, therefore, that she would wish our engagement -to conclude then. - -She assented to this, and we parted on the best of terms with one -another. - -Perhaps it may be thought odd that I did not pursue the ordinary -method of simply giving notice, and taking myself off, when I wanted -to go to another situation. Of course I could easily have done so if -I had liked; but in that case I should have lost all the fun that I -got out of the matter by the other plan. It amused me to make her act -as I chose, and herself dismiss me when I wished her to do so; and I -enjoyed feeling that her weak point rendered her in my hands an -unsuspecting puppet, that would kick or not, according to how I chose -to pull the strings. Be it remembered that love of fun has always -been a much stronger element in my character than amiability. - - - - - CHAPTER XI. - - AN UNWELCOME ADMIRER. - - -So now I was going to be a lady's-maid. I knew that the customs, -ideas, traditions, and general mode of thought prevailing in the -rank of life I was about to enter, would be likely to differ in many -ways from those to which I had hitherto been accustomed; and this -knowledge naturally made me rather anxious as to how easy I might -find it to adapt myself to my novel position, and to the people with -whom I should have to associate. I felt that I was on the brink of a -completely new experience, and looked forward with more trepidation -than I had expected to my initiation therein on joining Lord Mervyn's -household as a servant. Under these circumstances I laid down two -rules for my guidance, to which I determined to adhere as far as -possible: these were--first, carefully to avoid making enemies -amongst my fellow-domestics; and secondly, to try and discover and -conform to whatever unwritten laws of etiquette might be generally -established amongst them. And in accordance with the second of these -rules, I determined that on the day when I was due at 2000 Eaton -Square, I would not make my appearance there till towards supper -time; for I had often noticed at home that whenever a new servant -was coming, he or she was sure not to turn up till as late in the day -as possible; and from this I inferred that to arrive early at a new -place was probably not considered the right thing. - -It was, therefore, quite late in the evening when I drove up to Lord -Mervyn's door. The various articles I had had to purchase in order to -equip myself properly, had caused my possessions to outgrow the -modest little bag that had sufficed to contain them when I came to -London a few weeks before; and so I was now accompanied by a box -large enough to make a respectable show as it stood on the roof of -the cab which brought me. - -That cab, by the by, is always a sore recollection to me, for I -cannot forget that it was the means, indirectly, of my vanity -receiving a sharp blow. The way of it was this. - -As I knew that Lady Mervyn would defray my expenses in getting to her -house, of course I did not hesitate about coming in a cab; and of -course also, in charging the fare to her, I put it down as being just -double what I had really paid. When she came to settle her accounts -with me she demurred to this item, saying that the charge was far -beyond what it ought to have been for the distance from my lodging to -Eaton Square. I replied innocently that I had thought it seemed a -good deal, and had said so to the cabman at the time; but that as he -had declared it was not a penny more than he was entitled to, and as -I had supposed he must know the proper fare better than I did, I had -given him what he asked. - -Lady Mervyn accepted the explanation as satisfactory, and passed on -to the next item without further question. But, when paying me, she -remarked contemptuously that I must be uncommonly silly to let myself -be cheated so easily, and that in future she advised me to remember -that the word of a London cabman was not _always_ to be relied on -implicitly. - -As if _I_ needed any advice of that kind! Was it possible to hear -myself credited with such folly, and yet not refute the insulting -accusation instantly? _I_ to be considered such a greenhorn--_I_ who -prided myself on being anything but soft and easy to take in! - -Stung to the quick by her scornful words, my self-esteem would hardly -consent to submit to the affront in silence. It urged me to remind -her of the fact that there could, in any case, be no question of my -having let _myself_ be cheated, since it was not _I_ who was the -person by whom the fare was eventually to be paid. But such a retort, -though gratifying to my injured feelings, would have evidently been -to the last degree unbecoming to my position as lady's-maid. Luckily -my sense of this sufficed to keep me from answering her as I longed -to do, and I managed to listen humbly to the unmerited reproach of -gullibility, just as though I acquiesced in the justice of it. But it -was only by a desperate effort that I could thus control myself, for -I was wounded in a point where I was peculiarly sensitive. The -thought of the slur that had been cast on my knowledge of the world -and hard-headedness rankled in my breast for long afterwards, -irritating me to such an extent that I could not help feeling that my -dishonesty in overcharging Lady Mervyn was punished after all, and -that I had only come off second best in the affair. For the amount of -pecuniary profit I gained by it was absolutely insignificant, and -certainly inadequate to counterbalance the mortification which it -entailed upon my pride. - -The thought of this annoyance has led me away from the proper course -of my narrative. I apologise for the digression, and return to the -evening when I and my chattels were deposited by the cab at 2000 -Eaton Square. - -The dignity of the post I was to fill exonerated me from having to -join the common herd who supped in the servants' hall, and gave me -standing in the higher and more select society occupying the -housekeeper's room. Here we fared most sumptuously, for Lady Mervyn -had had a small dinner-party that night, and on these occasions it -was customary for the servants to finish up the relics of the feast -if they cared to do so. Bearing this in mind, the cook never omitted -to make the dishes of a liberal size, or to concoct a sufficient -amount of whatever sauce was required for the various _entrées_, -puddings, etc., to be able to keep back some of it when they were -sent up to the dining-room. By this means it was easy afterwards to -renovate most of them for downstairs use, even though the sauce might -have been popular with the gentry, and wholly consumed upstairs--at -least, as much of it as ever went there. Our meal, therefore, was -little inferior to, and almost identical with, that which had been -set before the guests overhead. It terminated with some capital -ice-pudding and dessert ices, of which there was an ample supply, in -well frozen condition;--this was thanks to the care of the butler, -who had helped the ladies and gentlemen with a very sparing hand, -and then at once sent the remainder to be preserved for us in the -refrigerator. - -My companions seemed so well inclined to be civil and to welcome me -amongst them, that I began to shake off my nervousness, and to think -that I was going to get on swimmingly. It was evidently considered -that in the presence of a newcomer like me, the first appropriate -topic of conversation to bring forward was the character of our -employers; and as every one in the room delivered his or her opinion -on the subject with perfect freedom, I soon picked up a good deal of -highly interesting information. - -Lady Mervyn was described as being "reg'lar out and out worldly, a -good bit more of a Turk than you would think from the quiet looks of -her; a bit mean, too, and one of those ladies who go poking their -noses into a larder to see what's there pretty near every morning." -I could see that the cook considered the last mentioned custom to be -highly objectionable, and an amount of _surveillance_ which was both -uncalled for and aggravating. - -The verdict on the eldest daughter was that she was "not much to look -at, and a bit of a screw, but better tempered than Lady M." - -The most popular member of the family was evidently Kitty, who was -pronounced to be "'andsome, merry, spirity, and pleasant-spoken to -both 'igh and low. For all that, though, you can see that she'll -never be satisfied without being first fiddle, or pretty near it, -wherever she is, and that in 'er 'art she likes 'igh folk and swells -better than them as isn't. She don't show 'er pride on the outside, -p'raps, so much as some do; but it's there all the same, and you -won't often find an 'ortier young lady, go where you will. She's 'er -ma's favourite, she is, and bound to marry a top-sawyer some -day--she'd never be 'appy with any one as wasn't." - -I took the opportunity of enquiring whether there was supposed to be -any particular individual in the wind, and I half expected that in -the answer I should hear something about Captain Norroy. This, -however, was not the case, nor was his name ever once mentioned -during the whole conversation. I evolved that she had plenty of -admirers, and was very gracious to them all, just as she was to every -one else; but that whenever any of them had been cheated by her -amiable manner into the belief that he had a chance of becoming her -husband, he had speedily been undeceived, and learnt, to his cost, -that her readiness to be great friends with him was no indication of -a disposition to be anything more. The most desirable of her many -admirers was, in the opinion of my informants, a certain Lord -Clement, who was clearly at her disposal if she chose to have him, -but whose affection she showed no signs of reciprocating. - -Her obduracy in this matter was quite inexplicable, I was told, he -being a rich young earl not more than eight years her senior, of good -family and irreproachable character, an excellent match in every -respect, and whose wife's rank and position would be high enough to -content any reasonable woman. There was no doubt that _her_ family -approved cordially of his suit, and that _his_ relations, also, had -no objection to it. One would have thought that any girl would have -been glad to get such a husband, and more particularly a girl like -her who set store on being a nob. Yet, for some reason or other, she -seemed not to know he had any attractions at all to offer, and turned -up her nose at him as if she didn't care a straw about such things. -Not that she was what you could call uncivil to him,--oh no, it was -not her nature to be that to any one,--but she certainly contrived to -give him more cold shoulder than encouragement. Whether or not he had -ever ventured to declare himself to her, in spite of this, was a -matter as to which opinions varied. The housekeeper did not believe -he _had_ proposed; whereas the butler took a contrary view in -consequence of what he had heard from a waiter friend of his who had -had opportunities of observing his lordship and Miss Kitty together -at several parties. But it was mere conjecture, and every one agreed -that there was no certainty about the matter either one way or other. - -It can easily be imagined that gossip of this kind was extremely -interesting to a person in my position, anxious to learn all I could -regarding the lay of the land which I had come to inhabit. The -communicativeness of my new associates, and the facility with which I -was getting on with them at starting, reassured me greatly. I began -to wonder at my former qualms, lest in descending to a lower social -grade I should find things to put up with that were distasteful and -unpleasant. Entering service was, after all, no such formidable -ordeal as I had imagined; there was nothing that I should not quickly -grow accustomed to in my unfamiliar surroundings; nothing to shock -the prejudices or fastidiousness of any reasonable person; no reason -whatever why I should not be able to fraternise, and make myself at -home, just as well in that class of life as in any other. Alas for -these _couleur de rose_ anticipations of mine! They were destined to -be of but very brief duration, and were soon ruthlessly destroyed by -the following most vexatious occurrence. - -As there is no accounting for tastes, and as even the ugliest of -women need not despair of meeting with some man in whose eyes she -will appear beautiful, or nice-looking at the very least, therefore -I might obviously have foreseen the possibility of my encountering -some male fellow-servant or other who would consider me sufficiently -attractive to flirt with. Of course, I ought to have taken this into -my calculations when I was contemplating the various chances and -events to which I should be liable on entering service. But it was a -contingency which, somehow or other, never once occurred to me; I -suppose I was too destitute of vanity about my own charms to think -of it. - -Now amongst my new companions was Lord Mervyn's valet, Perkins, a -pale-faced, sandy-haired, thick-lipped, abominably-scented man, -who wore flowing whiskers of inordinate length which he greatly -cherished; who believed himself to be universally acceptable to the -weaker sex, and who was conceited, cowardly, and revengeful. As bad -luck would have it, I happened to take his fancy at first sight; and -it all of a sudden dawned upon me, to my amazement and dismay, that -he was actually making me the object of very marked and unmistakable -attentions. - -Scandalised at the notion of a man-servant taking the liberty to -raise his eyes to a lady, I could hardly trust to the evidence of my -own senses at first. But then the matter seemed less unlikely when I -remembered that he had not a suspicion of there being any inequality -of rank between him and me, and that, as far as that went, I was in -his eyes just the same as any other maid in the house. - -What he should find to admire in me, who had certainly done nothing -to attract him, was beyond my power to imagine; but that did not -alter the very unpleasant fact that he _did_ regard me with favour, -for he made it too plain for there to be a doubt about the matter. I -shuddered to think that I must endure being made love to by a valet: -it was an odious and degrading idea. Had I realised the possibility -of it beforehand, I hardly knew whether I should ever have placed -myself where I should be exposed to the risk of anything so -disagreeable. Disgusted and angry at the admiration which I deemed an -insult, and was yet powerless to resent, I endeavoured to nip it in -the bud by energetic snubbing. Alas! he only thought that I was -affecting coyness in order to draw him on, and persisted in his -objectionable attentions all the more. - -To add to my annoyance, I perceived that I was meanwhile incurring -the bitter enmity of Lady Mervyn's maid, Robinson, to whom Perkins -had, before my coming, devoted himself chiefly, and who strongly -objected to any transfer of his affections. Too much blinded by -jealousy to see how unwelcome his vulgar compliments were to me, she -attributed the fickle conduct of her swain entirely to my wiles, and -thought that I alone was to blame for his deserting her. - -Unluckily the man had a smattering of French, and though his accent -was as bad as a Corsican's (which is saying a _great_ deal), he was -immensely proud of his acquirements as a linguist, and aired them on -every possible opportunity. Knowing that I, too, was supposed to be -accomplished in this line, he kept on addressing me in the one -foreign tongue which he believed himself to know, whenever he could -recollect enough of it to translate any remark that he wanted to -make. By this proceeding the flames of Robinson's wrath were -constantly being fanned higher and higher; for she--understanding -not a word of any language except her own--jumped to the conclusion -that whatever French observation he addressed to me must necessarily -be something of an extra-tender description, which would be unsuited -to the ears of the general public. - -I--anxious not to quarrel with her, and recoiling with horror from -the idea that any one could possibly suspect me of having the -faintest approach to a private understanding with Perkins--invariably -answered his speeches in English. But my efforts to undeceive her -were in vain, and by the time we retired to bed she had begun to -express her hostility in various unmistakable ways--such as darting -angry glances in my direction, giving vent to frequent sniffs -betokening great mental irritation, and making half-audible -observations as to the rudeness of talking secrets in company, and -the intense objection she had to meddlesome strangers who intruded -and made mischief amongst friends. - -A nice kettle of fish this is! thought I, in reviewing the events of -the day before I went to sleep. I certainly do not see how I am to -keep to my intention of not making enemies at this rate. And just -when I was beginning to feel sure that everything was going to be so -comfortable, too! Why could not that wretch Perkins have let me -alone, I wonder? Faugh! The idea of supposing that I could be pleased -with what _he_ considers pretty speeches. I think it's a great pity -that there are any men at all in the world,--or, anyhow, any except -gentlemen. - -There was something worse than mere pretty speeches in store for me. -On the day after my arrival I was going upstairs from dinner when I -suddenly saw Perkins coming towards me. No one else was in sight, and -he evidently thought it a good opportunity for prosecuting his -courtship vigorously. - -"Miss Jill, my dear," whispered he, leering at me detestably; "I'm -_dying_ for a kiss from them sweet lips of yours. Do give me one -now--there's no one to see." - -I was too much taken aback to be able to think of any answer which -would adequately express the intense horror and indignation with -which his insolent speech inspired me, so I pretended not to have -heard what he said. But I suspect that my face showed something of -what I felt, for he was not deceived by my affectation of deafness, -and continued, with a conceited snigger, whilst he stroked his -beloved whiskers complacently: - -"What--not just yet, my little partridge! _Tray biang!_ This evening, -or to-morrow, then, eh? Only I reelly _can't_ wait long, mind; and if -you go on being 'ard-'arted, I shall take that kiss without asking -leave. That's just what you want, I dessay. Bless you! _I_ know the -way to please the ladies. You're all the same--longing to be courted -and kissed, and yet making believe that you can't abide nothing of -the kind, all the time." - -I reached my room in a state of fury that was mixed with alarm, lest -he should attempt to execute his threat. Being stronger than me, -there was a chance that he might succeed in spite of all I could do -to prevent it. And since it made me frantic merely to _think_ of such -a humiliation, what should I do supposing the monster actually did -manage to profane my face with his lips? Should I kill him on the -spot, or should I expire from sheer disgust? How unutterably horrible -it was to have to associate with a creature who had such coarse, -boorish ideas of what was the proper way for a man to make himself -agreeable to a woman! This, verily, was a degradation for which I had -not bargained. It was a comfort that I was going abroad so soon; if I -could escape for a few days more, I should be out of reach of the -danger. And with this reflection I consoled myself as well as I -could, determining to be constantly on my guard as long as I was in -that house, lest the dreaded and hateful salute should come upon me -unawares, from some obscure corner or lurking-place. - -My apprehensions were but too well-founded, as I experienced on the -following evening. It was after dark, and I was proceeding along the -passage near the pantry, with a lighted candle in my hand, when my -enemy suddenly sprung out from some recess where he had been lying in -ambush. He endeavoured to throw his arms around me, exclaiming, as he -did so: "Now's our time, my pet! I can't _possibly_ wait no longer; -and no one's looking, so you needn't purtend not to like it." - -Moved by rage and fright to defend myself at all hazards, I had -recourse to the only weapon available; and against the odious face -and lips that were approaching mine I thrust the candle that I -carried. He tried to avoid the impending peril by blowing out the -light; but either he was too much confused, or else I was too quick -for him, and he failed to extinguish it. In another instant there was -a strong smell of burning hair, and one of his cherished whiskers was -on fire. He let go of me with an oath, and an exclamation of pain -and fear--for he was a shocking coward; and I passed on, quivering -with excitement, and divided between exultation at my escape and -self-hatred for having subjected myself to the disgrace of being thus -forced into a sort of romping struggle with a valet. - -When next I saw him he bore considerable traces of the contest. The -hairy appendages to his face, in which he delighted, were gone; for -the whisker I had set on fire had been so much destroyed that it had -had to be shaved off, and then of course its companion had been -obliged to follow suit. And besides this, there were on his lips and -cheek sundry inflamed and angry-looking burns and blisters, which I -regarded with vindictive satisfaction. - -When the other servants commented on the change in his appearance, -and inquired into the cause thereof, he accounted for it by a -story--which I did not trouble myself to contradict--about his having -had an accident with an unusually explosive match, the head of which -had flown off and burnt him. There was nothing so abominably -dangerous, he said, with savage emphasis, as an ill-made thing like -that, going off all of a sudden, and flaring and skipping about like -mad, when it looked as safe and quiet as possible. Regular man traps, -he considered them to be and if he could have his way, they should be -burnt, or got rid of somehow, every one of them. - -As he spoke he cast a malignant glance at me, which convinced me that -I had incurred his undying resentment, and that in his abuse of the -imaginary match he was conveying his opinion about my deserts. - -To that, however, I was indifferent; for in my eyes his hatred was -infinitely preferable to his love; I did not at all suppose he could -do me any harm, and only rejoiced to find what a wholesome effect my -violence had produced. He could by no means forgive the loss of his -whiskers and disfigurement which I had indicted on him; and after the -encounter above recorded he took no notice of me, except when he -thought he saw an opening for saying or doing anything likely to -annoy me--of which he always availed himself. - -Some of the ways by which he tried to show his spite were highly -ludicrous, and all the more so because they failed completely of -having the effect he desired. For instance, in helping the vegetables -he would omit to supply my wants in the proper order of precedence -belonging to my position, and would serve some inferior domestic with -potatoes before me. This, as I subsequently learnt, was intended as a -mortal offence, which ought to have wounded my feelings desperately. -But I was happily ignorant of it at the time, and had no suspicion of -the intended insult. As long as I had enough potatoes, it was all the -same to me whether I had them first or last; and when at dinner, he -passed over me, and handed the dish to the second housemaid before -me, I was all unconscious of the affront that was being offered, so -that my peace of mind was in no wise affected by it. - -But though, since he had given up making love to me, I was impervious -to most of his methods of annoyance, none the less did I find the -prevailing state of things uncomfortable in 2000 Eaton Square; and it -was with sincere joy that I found myself at last fairly off from -London, and accompanying Mrs. Rollin and Kitty to the Continent. I -hoped that I had seen the last of Perkins; or that, at all events, if -he and I should be destined to inhabit the same house again when I -returned from abroad, he would have got over his present bad temper -sufficiently to keep the peace with me. Certainly I never suspected -the implacable enmity of which--as I was to find by experience--he -was capable. - - - - - CHAPTER XII. - - THE PHOTOGRAPH AGAIN. - - -When fingers are set to work for the first time at dressing and -undressing any one else than their natural owner, they are apt to -feel uncommonly as if they were all thumbs; such, at least, was the -conclusion I came to at the outset of my career as lady's-maid. But -a very little practice sufficed to make the awkward sensation wear -off; and, after that, I was able easily to fulfil the duties of my -post. To these duties I had no dislike, and much preferred being -engaged in performing them to spending my time amongst other -domestics; for I could wait on two ladies without shocking my -self-respect in any way, whereas I felt ashamed and degraded at the -mere idea of being liable to be persecuted by a man like Perkins. I -tried hard to conquer this squeamishness, telling myself that it was -ridiculous and inconsistent for a woman like me to be so particular, -after having deliberately elected to knock about in the world, and -take what came. But my endeavours to reason myself into a sensible -view of the matter were in vain, and completely failed to uproot the -feeling that to be taken liberties with by a man-servant was a -humiliation not to be endured. - -The Perkins incident having put me out of charity with the whole -class--females and males alike--to which he belonged, it was a -satisfaction to me that I was to be the sole attendant accompanying -Mrs. Rollin and Kitty Mervyn abroad. This obviated all danger, at all -events for the present, of my having to associate with obnoxious -comrades. On the score of being dull for want of company I felt no -uneasiness, for I knew by experience that I could amuse myself -perfectly well when left to my own devices. Besides--had I not now -the opportunity which I had desired for observing Kitty Mervyn, -and trying to make out her character? I habitually regarded every -one with indifference; but she had for me a strange fascination, -which was strong enough to overcome that indifference, and I was -quite astonished at the extent to which she interested me. Let me -enumerate some of the attractions and qualities, both bodily and -mental, of this young lady, who was at once my mistress, and -also--though she would have been very greatly surprised to be told -so--my connection. - -In appearance she was tall, handsome, and imperial-looking, with a -bright and open expression of countenance. Her disposition was -upright, proud, honourable, and averse to everything mean. In -conversation she was clever, quick-witted, lively, and pleasant. And -as, furthermore, she was endowed with great social talent and a -remarkable knack of pleasing all with whom she came in contact, she -won hearts right and left, and was considered charming wherever she -went. She was, however, far from faultless. The germ of worldliness, -which inevitably creeps into an education amongst fashionable people, -had begun to develop itself, and to taint her nature; and the -conclave in her father's housekeeper's room had certainly not -erred in attributing to her pride and ambition. So marked was her -inclination to haughtiness that, when first I knew her, it sometimes -puzzled me why she should take the trouble she did to make herself -universally agreeable--even to people for whom she did not care, -from whom there was nothing to be gained in return, and who were -nobodies in her estimation. As, however, I came to understand her -better, I discovered the key to this enigma, and perceived that she -was actuated--whether consciously or only instinctively I do not -know--by a strong desire for two things which seemed almost as -indispensable to her as the air she breathed. These two things were -popularity and power, and without them she was never really happy. - -Her frank genial manner was well adapted to make people believe her -to be an unreserved, easily-read individual; but the more attentively -I studied her, the less inclined did I feel to think that impression -a correct one. I had doubts whether she ever showed much of her real -self; whether there were not recesses, of unsuspected depth, hidden -within her where no mortal eye could penetrate; and whether she did -not often make use of unreserve as a mask to conceal its opposite. -The possibility of this made her all the more attractive to me. -Curiosity as to what might lie beneath the surface she presented to -the world, served to increase the drawing towards her that I had -always felt; and had I been so placed as to have a chance of making -friends with her, I should certainly have tried to do so. But it was, -as I well knew, hopeless to attempt such a thing in my present -position; for she was not the sort of girl to condescend to familiar -intercourse with social inferiors, and in her eyes I was simply a -maid. Under the circumstances, it would obviously be ridiculous if I -were to let myself become fond of her, and I resolved firmly not to -be guilty of any sentimental folly of the kind. Yet, in spite of this -prudent resolution, I must confess that I sometimes had hard work not -to yield to the indefinable charm which she had for me; and had she -vouchsafed me any special marks of favour, I am afraid I should -inevitably have made a fool of myself, and become romantically -devoted to her. As, however, I had no particular attraction for her, -such as she had for me, that fact contributed greatly to restrain my -liking within reasonable limits. To indulge in an unrequited -attachment had always seemed to me decidedly weak and contemptible -(notwithstanding that such a man as the author of the _Vita Nuova_ -had done it); and it would have discomposed me immensely to detect -in myself any symptoms of being capable of that weakness. - -In short, I was sufficiently smitten with Kitty to have cast prudence -to the winds, and let my whole heart go out to her, _if_ she had held -up her finger to me. But that little word "if" made just all the -difference. My sense of dignity might safely be reckoned on to assist -reason and prudence in fighting against an infatuation for any person -who did not care for me in return. - -From London we proceeded to Paris; thence we travelled slowly across -France, stopping at various places of interest, and presently reached -Cannes, where my two ladies meant to make a stay of a week or so -before journeying on into Italy. - -So far, I had seen and heard nothing to confirm the gossip about Lord -Clement's admiration for Kitty, which had been communicated to me by -the servants. But I received ample proof of its truth on the day -after our arrival at Cannes, and this happened in the following -manner:-- - -I was engaged in brushing the dust off a dress which Kitty had been -wearing, when I found in the pocket a letter which she had received -that morning from England. I did not hesitate to read it. When -letters have secrets in them, people do not leave them about, thought -I; so, since Kitty has not troubled to take this one out of her -pocket, of course there are no private matters in it, and there is no -reason why I should not see if the contents are amusing. - -The epistle was from Lady Mervyn, and the portion of it which most -interested me ran thus: - -"Lord Clement told me last week that he thought he should go yachting -to the Riviera at once, and as I have little doubt what is the -attraction that takes him there, I daresay you will see something of -him before long. I do hope, dearest Kitty, that you will not set -yourself against him, and that you will try and reconsider the answer -you gave him before. I am, as you know, the _last_ person to try to -over-persuade you into a marriage against your own inclinations; but -yet I cannot resist putting in a good word for him, for it touches -me to see how truly he loves you, and how constant to you he is, -in spite of your refusal. Besides that, he really is a man in a -thousand, and one to whom any mother would trust her daughter -joyfully. Not only has he the recommendations of rank and wealth, but -moreover he is unusually amiable, high-minded, conscientious, steady, -and superior to the temptations to folly and extravagance to which -young men in his position are so peculiarly open. With the exception -of yourself, I doubt there being a single girl in London--or in -England either--who would not accept him gladly, if only he asked -her. And I'm sure one can't wonder at his being so run-after as he -is, when one remembers what his money and position are, what immense -influence they give him, what an excellent character he bears, and -how thoroughly good he is in every way. However, you know already how -high he stands in my good graces, and I had better drop the subject -for fear of boring you by going over the same old tale again. Only do -remember, my darling, that it is only the earnest wish I have to -secure your happiness which makes me so anxious for you not to -dismiss him without well considering what you do. Otherwise you may, -perhaps, some day find yourself repenting your past decision, and -regretting that you were so persistent in rejecting one of the few -men of whom it may truly be said, that he is all that a husband -should be." - -Not badly done, my lady, thought I, as I refolded the letter, and -restored it to its place. You knew what a tempting bait power is to -Kitty when you put in that bit about the influence which the young -man's position gives him. And you understood who you were writing to -when you reminded her of his attractiveness to other people--she's -likely enough to value goods at the price the rest of the world put -upon them. Evidently you, like the servants, are puzzled to account -for her indisposition to receive the proposals of this rich, titled, -desirable, and altogether delightful suitor. Well! it rather puzzles -me too. Can it be that she prefers some one else? No one seems to -suspect such a thing; but yet it might be true for all that. What if -that photograph I found in her purse were the explanation of the -mystery? There is no impossibility in the idea of a _tendresse_ -existing between her and Captain Norroy, which they have hitherto -managed to conceal from other people. I wish I could see them -together, and then I should have some chance of discovering whether -this conjecture of mine is right or not. - -Whilst speculating thus, a brilliant idea suddenly flashed into my -mind. This was, that I might avail myself of the surreptitiously-obtained -_carte-de-visite_ (which I had carefully preserved), in order to find -out what I wanted to know. I would produce it unexpectedly, when -there was no chance of Kitty's being particularly on guard, and watch -for any signs of emotion that she might show on seeing it. - -Wrapped up exactly as it had been when in her purse, and even in the -self-same bit of paper, I put it into a blank envelope, which I -presented next time I went to wait on her. - -"I picked this up on the floor, just outside," said I. "I was going -to take it to the landlord; but then I thought perhaps it might be -something of yours, as I found it close to the door of your room, so -I had better ask you about it first." - -The envelope was not fastened, as I had feared that if it were closed -she would scruple to open it, which would be fatal to the success of -my stratagem. - -"Thank you," she answered, taking it from me carelessly. "I don't -think it belongs to me, but I can soon see." - -I was doing her hair at the time, and commanded an excellent view of -her face reflected in the looking-glass opposite which she sat. Her -expression of _insouciance_ vanished like magic when she had undone -the paper and seen what it contained. The colour rushed into her -face, which softened for a moment in a way I had never before seen it -do, then came a stern, rigid, haughty, resolute look, as though she -would defy the whole world to discover whatever secret she chose to -conceal. - -She did not speak at first, but turned round the photograph again -and again, examining both it and the paper in which it had been -wrapped. - -At last she said: "This certainly is my property; but I can't imagine -how it came to be where you found it. I fully believed it to have been -lost some time ago." - -"Don't you think," I suggested, "that when you thought you had lost -it, you had perhaps really only slipped it into your writing-case, or -into some book or papers which you haven't happened to open since -then until now? Then it fell out without your noticing it, and either -you were at that time at the place where I picked it up, or else some -one's dress may have swept it there from your room. It was very near -to the door." - -"That is _possible_, no doubt," she returned, thoughtfully. "Yet -still, I can hardly believe it to have happened so. I felt as -positive as one can be about anything, that it was not in an envelope -at all, and that I had put it"--she hesitated a moment, and then -finished, "somewhere else." - -As she did not seem inclined to mention where she really had put it, -I thought I had better pretend to suppose that its destination had -been a photograph-album. - -"It would be very easy to be mistaken about what you had done with -it, though," said I. "Probably when it was given you it was in an -envelope, and then you were interrupted just as you were going to -stick it into your book, and after that you forgot all about it, and -it got mislaid." - -"Well, you may be right," she replied. "Indeed I don't see any other -way of accounting for the matter. But it is odd how I can have been -so completely wrong in the impression I had as to what I had done -with it." - -The theory I had propounded seemed sufficiently plausible to content -her, and she did not again allude to the affair. But I had little -doubt that she thought about it a good deal for all that, because of -a new look which I noticed in her face occasionally during the next -day or two, and which was different from any other that I had seen -there hitherto. A gleam of soft light would flash out from her eyes, -accompanied by an expression of countenance which was curious, -half-ashamed, tender, and wistful, and gave the impression rather -of unhappiness than of the joy a girl would be likely to feel when -thinking of her lover. This look of sadness would last perhaps for a -minute, and then invariably be succeeded by one that was scornful, -hard, and impenetrable. - -It was beyond me to interpret these signs satisfactorily. That -Captain Norroy had power to excite emotions of _some_ kind in her -breast I felt sure; but whether these emotions were pleasurable or -the reverse, I was unable to make out. - - - - - CHAPTER XIII. - - LORD CLEMENT. - - -Lady Mervyn's prediction regarding Lord Clement's movements proved to -be correct. His yacht, _La Catalina_, arrived at Cannes two or three -days after we did, and that event was speedily followed by the -appearance of her noble owner at the hotel where we were staying. - -The interest with which Kitty's affairs inspired me had led to my -speculating a good deal on the subject of this young lord; and I had -made up my mind that he was almost sure to have something or other -disagreeable about him which would counterbalance his many charms, -and afford some explanation of her unwillingness to accept him. No -doubt, thought I, he is loutish, silly, ugly, untidy, bad mannered, -eccentric, or in some other way objectionable. This anticipation, -however, turned out to be wrong, and I soon perceived that he had -none of the defects with which my lively imagination had credited -him. - -He was rather below middle height, dressed well and quietly, -and could never by any accident be mistaken for anything but a -gentleman--which, indeed, he certainly was in every respect. Neither -handsome nor ugly, his face was amiable and mild, but possessed no -other very marked expression of any kind. One would not suppose him -to be powerful or weak, distinguished or insignificant, a genius or a -fool. If there was nothing specially attractive about his appearance, -neither was there the reverse. - -His intellect was not in any way brilliant, but he had good sense and -fair average abilities, was eminently painstaking, and would work as -laboriously at whatever he thought it his duty to do as though his -livelihood had depended on his exertions. In short, I think that the -most appropriate description of him is mediocrity, in respect of -everything except moral qualities; but where these were concerned he -was by no means mediocre, being far more conscientious and anxious to -do right than are the majority of rich young men who have the world -at their feet. - -The most trying thing about him was a tendency to make a fuss about -trifles, and to attach a needless importance to all the minor -proprieties of life, which was sometimes rather irritating. But, -after all, fidgettiness and extra deference to Mrs. Grundy are only -very small defects in the eyes of most people. I could understand -that Kitty might occasionally be aggravated by these failings, yet -they alone were not, in my opinion, sufficient to account for his -being refused by a girl who was ambitious, and who had enough -perspicacity and worldly wisdom to appreciate what an excellent match -he was, and what an opening for ambition would be afforded by the -position of his wife. - -I was curious to know how Kitty treated him, and profited by every -opportunity I had of watching them together. From these observations -I came to the conclusion that he had inspired her neither with -affection nor aversion, and that she was struggling to bring herself -to accept him. I thought that her reason and judgment were pleading -for him, and expatiating on his attractions, as her mother had done, -and that she was lending a willing ear to these advocates, and doing -all she could to let herself be convinced by their arguments. Yet I -had a great idea, too, that the effort went against the grain with -her, and that she often could not help keeping him at arm's length, -even in spite of her own wish. It was as if she had been conscious -of the grasp of an invisible hand, from which she could not wrench -herself free, and which constantly drew her back when she strove to -approach nearer to her suitor. - -Is it Captain Norroy's hand that restrains her? I asked myself, as I -pondered over this result of my observations. Yet, if so, it seems -very odd that no one except me should have discovered their attachment -for one another. From all that I have seen and heard I should have -thought that a young couple in society would never have managed to -become spoons to any serious degree without giving rise to some -amount of suspicion as to the true state of affairs between them. -How ever can these two have contrived to deceive the lynx eyes of -gossip-loving servants, and to hoodwink the worldly and wide-awake -Lady Mervyn, whose heart is set on securing a brilliant match for her -favourite daughter? - -Lord Clement's behaviour towards Kitty after his arrival at Cannes -seemed to me that of a man who felt himself to be on trial--was -nervous lest she should think him over eager in his addresses, and -objected to getting himself talked about with a girl who perhaps -would not marry him after all. His first proceeding was to get -introduced to Mrs. Rollin, who had till then been a stranger to him. -The introduction was easily effected, and after that he had no lack -of opportunities of meeting the object of his affections; for Mrs. -Rollin responded cordially to his advances, inviting him to join in -all the excursions to neighbouring lions which she and Kitty made, -and letting it be apparent that he was most welcome whenever he chose -to pay them a visit, and to accompany them anywhere. - -I have no doubt that this civility of hers resulted, in the first -instance, from something said by Lady Mervyn as to his admiration -for Kitty, and the desirability of encouraging him as much as -possible. But though this may have been the original motive of the -_empressement_ with which Mrs. Rollin received him, there was no fear -of her not welcoming him for his own sake when once she had made -acquaintance with him and discovered what he was like. For she was a -person who held that the most important matter in life was to stand -well in the world's opinion, and consequently she was quite charmed -with his scrupulous regard for _convenances_ and extreme horror of -doing anything that could shock Mrs. Grundy. - -"There's nothing of more consequence," Mrs. Rollin would declare, -"than to keep up appearances, because, provided one does that, one is -quite safe to be thought perfect. And that's what every one wishes to -be thought, or, if they don't, they ought to. I call it quite wicked -of any one to pretend that it doesn't matter what the world's opinion -about them is. Depend upon it, that whatever the whole world thinks -_can't_ be wrong; and that if a person is generally condemned or -praised, there's always some good reason for the blame or the -approval." - -Keeping up appearances in the eyes of the world was, therefore, -her standard of perfection; and she strove zealously never to fall -short of that standard, and always to fulfil its requirements -punctiliously. Nevertheless, it would be a mistake to deduce from -this that she was such an abject slave of the world's opinion as to -let herself be governed by it in things which it did not see. On the -contrary, she drew a line between her public and private actions, and -did not allow it to interfere at all with the latter. If she had -tastes and inclinations to which it objected, she did not, on that -account, sacrifice them, if it was possible that they could be -indulged in secret. How she would act, under such circumstances, was -illustrated by her behaviour regarding French novels. These she -preferred to any other kind of reading, and greedily devoured as -many as she could lay hold of. But as she knew that the world -sometimes thinks fit to frown at an indiscriminate study of these -books (who shall say whether that disapprobation is real or -feigned?), therefore she was careful not to reveal her partiality for -them. Yet she did not rush to the opposite extreme and disclaim any -acquaintance whatsoever with that class of literature. She had no -idea of hiding her light under a bushel, and not being duly credited -with as many accomplishments as she possessed, and therefore liked -to have it known that she understood a foreign language well enough -to read and enjoy works written in it. So what she did was, to -profess to read French novels solely with the laudable object of -keeping up her French; while, at the same time, she was most cautious -in talking about them in public, and never betrayed the slightest -knowledge of the contents of any that were not fairly decorous and -proper. - -But _I_ knew better than that. It was a matter in which her maid -could not be deceived as easily as the rest of the world. - -Bohemianism being an open setting-at-defiance of the world's opinion, -was quite detestable to her, with all that savoured thereof; and the -very correct Lord Clement was, of course, a man after her own heart. -There was, however, a wide difference between the respective ways in -which he and she regarded Mrs. Grundy. For while the gentleman had a -genuine esteem for that great social authority, and paid her homage -in all sincerity, Mrs. Rollin did it only in appearance, and was -moved thereto chiefly by fear. - -The room in which I slept was immediately over Mrs. Rollin's -sitting-room; and by sitting at the open window in my room I could -hear--when the weather was calm--most things that were said by people -on the balcony beneath. Thus I overheard an interesting conversation -as to plans which took place after we had been at Cannes for about as -long a time as my two ladies intended to stay there. Where to go -next, was the question they were debating. And as Lord Clement -happened to call just then, Mrs. Rollin appealed to him to assist -them with his advice in the matter. - -His manner of complying with this request was eminently characteristic -of him. Kitty's society was the object of his keenest desires at -that moment, and he was averse to the idea of any movement that would -involve his being separated from her. Under these circumstances, and -considering the amount of encouragement he had received--especially -from the young lady's _chaperone_--some men would have taken it for -granted that their companionship was acceptable, and that it was a -matter of course for them to accompany the two ladies to their next -destination. Not so, however, would Lord Clement behave. Thus openly -to attach himself to them as a travelling companion would inevitably -give rise to gossip; and to do anything likely to be talked about as -unusual was quite contrary to his ideas of propriety. Though the real -object of his visit to the Mediterranean might have been Kitty, yet -the ostensible reason had been yachting; and this pretext he had no -intention of renouncing by leaving his vessel. In taking part in the -discussion as to what our future movements were to be, he gave no -indication of being personally interested in the matter in any way, -and assumed the air of a strictly impartial adviser. At the same -time, however, his opinion as to the desirability of places was -in such remarkably exact proportion to their availability from -the sea, that I listened with much amusement, and thought that the -disinterestedness of his counsels might very fairly be doubted. - -Various localities had been suggested and talked over without any -determination being arrived at, when Kitty observed, "Now I've quite -a new place to propose; and that's Corsica. I saw it looking just -like a purple cloud resting on the sea the other day, and I have a -great fancy to go and see it close. For one thing, there's no railway -there yet; and I should like, for once in my life, to feel that I was -in a land through which locomotives have never puffed. It would be an -absolutely new sensation to me, and one which the present rate of -civilisation will soon render unattainable, I expect; so I vote we -experience it while we can. Besides, I'm sure it would be a good -place for sketching. What do you say, Aunt Georgina? Don't you think -it'll be pleasant to get away from this cockney old Riviera, and go a -little bit out of the regular beaten track where _every one_ goes?" - -"Kitty, Kitty!" remonstrated her aunt, "it quite distresses me to -hear you talk like that! You really shouldn't speak contemptuously of -the beaten track, and be so anxious to get away from it. Remember -that the fact of its being worn by many feet is also a sure proof of -its being smoother, pleasanter, and in every way preferable to other -tracks." - -"All right, aunty," laughed Kitty; "I won't abuse your favourite -walk since it vexes you! But doesn't it strike you that I should -appreciate its merits all the more if I were to see with my own -eyes--just for once you know--how horrid some other route can be? And -isn't that a good reason for going to Corsica? _Do_ let's go there; -I've quite set my heart on it." - -Kitty rarely failed to get her own way with Mrs. Rollin, who was -as susceptible as the rest of the world to the girl's powers of -fascination. But the hesitating, reluctant tone in which the elder -lady answered, showed me that she had no great fancy for this -Corsican visit. "Well, I hardly know what to say," she returned -slowly; "to begin with, How does one get there? and in the next -place, What's it like when one _is_ there? I think I've heard you say -you were there once, Lord Clement; do help me to make up my mind -about this, and advise me whether or not to do what this rash niece -of mine wishes." - -Corsica naturally found favour in the young man's eyes as being -convenient for yachting purposes. "Oh, if you ask me, I decidedly -advise you to go," he replied; "it's really a pretty sort of country, -besides being interesting as the birthplace of Napoleon. By the by -you should read Boswell's tour if you go. As for getting there, you -_could_ go by steamer either from Marseilles to Ajaccio, or else from -Leghorn or Genoa to Bastia. But I hope that you will allow me the -pleasure of taking you over in _La Catalina_, which you'll find far -more comfortable than either of the regular steamers--they're all -nasty, dirty, uneasy little boats, I believe." - -"I'm sure we are greatly obliged to you for so good an offer," -answered Mrs. Rollin, "and I think we should gladly avail ourselves -of it _if_ we were to decide upon going. But I fancy I've heard it -said that one can't get anything to eat there--which wouldn't suit me -at all. And then, too, there are the dangers from vendettas and -banditti to be taken into consideration." - -"Oh now, don't go being a perverse aunty, and making difficulties out -of nothing!" exclaimed Kitty. "How could the natives exist if there -wasn't something to eat? And a vendetta is a strictly private family -affair, which doesn't affect strangers one atom. And as for banditti, -it's not Corsica but Sicily that is full of them; my belief is that -you've gone and mixed the two islands together in your head. The -Corsicans are always supposed to be a particularly amiable and -friendly set of people as far as ever _I_ heard. Except, of course, -when there's a vendetta to excite them, and that wouldn't matter to -outsiders like you and me." - -"I assure you that that is true, Mrs. Rollin," added Lord Clement, -"and that you have really no cause of apprehension from robbers. The -only danger of that kind which I ever heard mentioned during my stay -there was from escaped convicts. Now and then a few manage to get -out of the prison, I believe, and support themselves _à la_ brigand -on the mountains, till they are either retaken or else contrive to -get across to Sardinia to join some of the banditti there. But that -only happens so very seldom that it really is not worth taking into -consideration." - -"How about the hotels?" inquired Mrs. Rollin; "are there any good -ones to be met with?" - -"Oh, they are not at all bad at the two chief seaports--Ajaccio and -Bastia," he replied, "and there would not be any necessity for you -to sleep anywhere else. I could take you from the one town to the -other in my yacht, and from those places you could make inland -expeditions within the limits of a day, which would enable you to see -a great deal of the country without having to rough it at all. I -can't say much for the hotel accommodation anywhere except at the two -chief towns, and shouldn't recommend you to go travelling about in -the interior. But of course you would not care to visit the more wild -and out-of-the-way parts." - -"You mustn't be too sure of that," said Kitty, laughing. "Whatever a -place may be, it's attractive to me if it's different from any other -that I've ever seen before. And Aunt Georgina isn't _quite_ so -miserable when beyond reach of luxuries as you might think to hear -her talk. I've even known her go without five o'clock tea and yet be -happy! For my part I begin to feel an intense desire arising in my -breast to hunt up an escaped convict and fraternise with him, or at -least to go and inspect his lair. What a novel subject for a sketch -it would be! And I'm _sure_ that you'll like to do whatever pleases -me, aunty, for you always do. Now isn't that true?" - -"Well, well, perhaps I do my dear, but only within reasonable limits, -please to remember," returned her aunt, who was considerably -influenced by Lord Clement's support of the Corsican scheme. "People -of my age don't regard 'roughing it' with the same enthusiasm as some -of the young ones, who don't really know what that process implies, -and for whom it has all the charm of novelty. I should certainly -draw the line a long way before the escaped convict you wish to -meet. However, joking apart, from what Lord Clement says, there -does not seem to be any reason against running over to the island -and gratifying your whim to have a peep at it, though I quite agree -with him as to its being undesirable to penetrate into any remote -and inaccessible parts, where neither pleasure nor advantage are to -be gained. I never can see the good of going to places where no one -else goes. There's no one one knows there; and besides that, as no -one knows anything about them, there's no chance of finding them -necessary, or even useful, as topics of conversation in society. So -that visiting such places is mere waste of time and money in _my_ -opinion!" - -"Well, then we may consider Corsica to be our next destination -anyhow," said Kitty triumphantly. "That's the first thing to settle, -and there is no need to make up our minds as to anything further just -yet. Time enough for that by and by, when we get there." - -After a little more discussion it was decided that we should be -conveyed to Ajaccio in _La Catalina_; which vessel, though not -containing berths enough for us to have slept a night on board, was -yet quite capable of accommodating us very comfortably for the time -requisite to perform the passage between Cannes and Ajaccio. What our -plans should be after reaching the island was left quite uncertain; -for though Mrs. Rollin was well inclined to stay only at the two -chief towns and move from one to the other in the yacht, as Lord -Clement had proposed, yet Kitty was not to be induced to commit -herself to any definite approval of this scheme, and without her -approval it was impossible to feel sure of its being carried out, for -she generally got her own way about things she cared for. All she -would say was, that perhaps it might be a good plan and perhaps not, -and that there was not the least need to settle the matter positively -yet. - -Lord Clement was evidently happy to have had his offer of the yacht -accepted--for the voyage across at all events. But I think that his -satisfaction was somewhat marred by a dread of Kitty's taking the bit -between her teeth when once she should be at Corsica, running away -with her aunt, all over the island, and getting out of his reach from -the sea; if the whim to do it came to her, there was but small -probability that she would not accomplish her purpose. - - - - - CHAPTER XIV. - - AT AJACCIO. - - -The inevitable Mediterranean roll was in less force than usual when -we crossed to Corsica, and as we were all pretty fair sailors we had -a pleasant passage, notwithstanding the anticipations to the contrary -of our especial waiter at the Cannes hotel. He was a brisk, cheery -little fellow, with such a power of sympathising with other people -that he always identified himself with those guests who were under -his particular care, and took their affairs to heart almost as though -they were his own. Going to sea and being sea-sick meant precisely -the same thing to him; consequently, from the moment he heard of our -contemplated trip he became full of compassion for the sufferings we -must undergo, and was good-naturedly eager to think of, and suggest, -every possible alleviation for the misery which he confidently -predicted for us. As we departed from the hotel his final words were -to impress upon my two ladies that, last thing before going to sea, -one should always eat a hearty meal, because, "ça-facilite--et sans -ça, c'est si fatigante." I am sorry to have to add, however, that -this well-intentioned speech was received in by no means as friendly -a spirit as that in which it was offered. For it was quite contrary -to Mrs. Rollin's notions of propriety that one who was a man, and -an inferior, should presume publicly to give her advice as to the -management of her interior; so, instead of making the amicable -response that was evidently expected, she swept past him with a -freezing look and an audible remark to Kitty about the atrocious -vulgarity of foreign servants who had never been taught to know their -place. - -When we arrived at Ajaccio we separated from Lord Clement, he -remaining on board _La Catalina_, whilst we proceeded to a hotel. -During the voyage Kitty had been more civil to him than usual,--perhaps -as a reward for his assistance in persuading her aunt to come to -Corsica,--and this favourable humour still continued on reaching -_terra firma_. A question hazarded by him as we left the yacht, as -to what should be done next day, was replied to by her with a -graciousness which made it apparent that his company would be -acceptable, if he chose to join her and her aunt in whatever they -might be doing. - -Accordingly, I was not surprised to see him appear at our hotel first -thing next morning. Shortly afterwards they all three sallied forth -to see the pictures at the _Collège_ Fesch; then they ordered a -basket to be packed with provisions, and, the weather being splendid, -hired a carriage and drove off for a day's outing beyond Pisciatella. -The special object of the two younger people was sketching, to which -Kitty was greatly addicted, and for which she had a decided talent. -Lord Clement, on the contrary, had no natural gift in that line; -but, none the less, he strove laboriously to acquire the art, because -he regarded drawing as a highly moral, elevating, correct, and -unexceptionable amusement, and therefore one to be cultivated and -encouraged as much as possible. As for Mrs. Rollin, she had a French -novel in her pocket, and would be perfectly happy to bask in the sun -and read whilst her companions sketched or flirted, as might seem -good in their own eyes. - -My employers being thus disposed of for the day, I was left alone -with nothing particular to do. The streets were too filthy to be very -inviting, so, being a good walker, I went for a stretch along the -road towards the Isles Sanguinaires. It was a lovely day, and I -thoroughly enjoyed the beauty of the walk, and the contrast between -winter, represented by snow-covered Monte Oro in the distance, and -summer, felt in the hot sunshine that warmed me through and through, -and sparkled on the brilliant blue sea beside the road. And when I -got beyond the limits of the town there were wild hillsides rising -on my right, all covered with low bushes of some kind of cistus, -which, though now brown and scrubby-looking, would be beautiful, I -thought, when in full bloom. - -But I must not expatiate on the scenery, as that has nothing to do -with my story. What I saw in the course of that walk, to which I now -wish particularly to call attention, is this: Near the outskirts of -the town I came to a number of small houses standing pretty close -together on one side of the road. Each was in the middle of a little -plot of ground, which was surrounded either by a wall, or else by -strong iron railings; and this enclosure was only to be entered by a -gate, whence a short drive led to the door of the house within. Some, -but not all, had a family name stuck up at the entrance; and some of -the plots of ground were merely turfed over, whilst others were -nicely laid out in flower-beds and borders. - -One would naturally have concluded these buildings to be villas, if -it had not been for the curious fact of their being destitute of -windows. This puzzled me; for I did not suppose that Corsicans could -be different from the rest of the world in disliking to live in -windowless habitations. - -Whilst I was staring at these mysterious houses, and wondering what -they were for, a funeral came along the main road, and turned into -the gate of the outer enclosure of one of them. This excited my -curiosity still more, so I addressed myself to a respectable looking -passer-by, and asked him what those little villas were, and to whom -they belonged. He replied that they were "chapelles mortuaires," or, -in other words, private burialplaces, and that each one belonged -to a different family. On questioning further, I learnt that these -"chapelles mortuaires" were by no means peculiar to the neighbourhood -of towns, but were found in remote parts of the island also, as the -possession of them was quite customary amongst all Corsicans. - -I thanked the man for his information, and continued my walk. I -thought it seemed a quaint idea to build villa residences for the -dead, and I then dismissed the subject from my mind. Certainly it -never entered my head that I myself was destined before long to make -acquaintance with the interior of one. - -That evening I discovered that Kitty had a new scheme in her head. -What instigated her to it I cannot say. It may have been the spirit -of perversity, or else a guide-book which she had been studying -diligently; or else, perhaps, that she was tired of being civil to -Lord Clement, and wanted to escape from him for a while. But anyhow, -for some reason or other, it had been borne in upon her that it -would be the most delightful thing possible to make a fortnight's -driving-tour through the island for the purpose of seeing the country -and sketching. Knowing that she would probably have a difficulty in -getting her aunt to consent to this scheme, she did not intend to -propound it until she had first ascertained that it was really -feasible, and also found out whatever information might be requisite -for its execution. - -Her first step, therefore, was to impart the project to me, telling -me that she wished me to make inquiries as to various matters -connected with it--such as what sort of inns were to be found at the -small inland towns; whether the roads were in good condition for -travelling on; whether they were likely to be blocked by snow in the -mountainous districts; what it would cost to hire a carriage; who was -the best jobmaster in Ajaccio, etc. - -I was charmed at a plan which harmonised so well with my own love of -change and adventure, and entered into it readily. Being curious to -know whether she contemplated being accompanied by Lord Clement or -not, I put a fishing question to that effect. "What sized carriage am -I to ask about?" said I; "how many must it hold?" - -"Why, my aunt and I, and you, _of course_," she answered rather -sharply, as if not well pleased at my having entertained a doubt on -the subject. "I should have thought you might have known that -yourself. We should only take a couple of carpet bags with us, and -leave the heavy luggage behind, so as to travel as light as possible; -therefore we shouldn't want at all a big carriage. It should be an -open one, and have a hood to put up in case of rain." - -Oh, thought I, on hearing this, evidently then my lord is meant to be -left to himself; his fair weather has not lasted long after all. I -suppose that she has been putting a strain on herself to be civil to -him, that now comes the reaction, and that she is going to fly off at -a tangent from the line of conduct which was dictated by worldly -policy, and not by natural inclination. Well, it does not matter to -me whether she marries him or not, so I do not want to interfere one -way or other; I have only to look on at the play and be amused. I -hope she will be able to carry out this driving-tour scheme anyhow; -for it is just the sort of thing I should like myself. - -I lost no time in performing her commission to the best of my ability. -Entering into casual conversations with sundry natives--waiters, for -instance, a couple of talkative shopkeepers, and the driver of a -fiacre who was sunning himself on the steps of his vehicle--I -cautiously led up to the topics which I had been told to find out -about, knowing that a stranger was more likely to arrive at an -honest opinion in this indirect way than by blunt, straightforward -inquiries. By means of questions that were apparently purposeless, I -elicited a good deal of information as to the relative merits of -different hostelries and individuals, which might very likely have -been withheld if I had let it be seen that I had any especial reason -for wishing to know. Thus I learnt too who was reputed the best -_patron des voitures_, and how much would be the probable difference -between what he would _ask_ and what he would _take_ for the hire of -a carriage; this difference being a sum of from 8 to 12 francs a day, -according to the opinion he happened to form of the hard-headedness -and determination not to be cheated of whoever engaged him. - -Having found out as much as I could, I passed it all on to Kitty, -who, armed with this knowledge, took the opportunity of hair-brushing -time that same evening to suggest the driving-tour to Mrs. Rollin. -That lady at once pronounced the scheme wild and impracticable. On -being asked why, she brought forward all the objections she could -think of, every one of which was met and answered by Kitty with a -readiness that quite staggered her aunt. Mrs. Rollin had been far too -much engrossed in one of Zola's novels to notice the attention with -which her niece had recently been perusing books of Corsican travel; -and the unexpected and intimate acquaintance with the subject -suddenly displayed by Kitty almost took away the aunt's breath. -Evidently it had never occurred to her that there was a possibility -of Kitty's thus making up her mind, and finding out all requisite -particulars, without having given a single hint of what she was -thinking of. Yet here was the plan, all cut and dried and ready, -with every detail gone into. - -Certainly the girl made the most of what she had read and heard; and -no one, to hear her talk, would have believed that this was her first -visit to the island. She discoursed learnedly about where the best -scenery was; what towns had good accommodation; what were the names -of the various inns; and what the cost of living and of the carriage -would be. She had got up her subject thoroughly; had an answer ready -for all difficulties that it was possible to suggest; made everything -look _couleur-de-rose_; and quoted, as a precedent for what she -wanted to do, which would have weight with her hearer, the example -of an English lady of rank and fashion, who had been travelling about -in Corsica a few years before, and of whom she had just happened to -hear. Kitty's energy, skill in pleading her cause, and powers of -persuasion, were more than her admiring and less strong-willed -relative could resist. The scheme, as thus set forth, appeared quite -delightful; Lord Clement was on board his yacht, beyond reach of -being taken into consultation; and so the end of the matter was, -that Mrs. Rollin assented to all that Kitty wished, and that I -consequently received orders to go out the first thing next morning -and arrange for hiring a carriage. - -This I accordingly did; and as I passed through the streets towards -the residence of the _patron des voitures_, I met Lord Clement on his -way to the hotel, looking just as usual--that is to say, the essence -of propriety, clean, well-dressed, placid, gentlemanlike, English, -and (to my mind,) uninteresting. I did not dislike him, but his -intense love of respectability and correctness aggravated me; and I -thought, maliciously, that his present placid satisfaction would be -ruffled by the news of the contemplated expedition, and that I should -like to see his face when he heard of it. For it could hardly be -expected that a man who had brought the object of his affections to a -place where he hoped to be able to be with her daily, would relish -the sudden discovery that she was going to leave him in the lurch, -and take herself off out of his reach for a fortnight at least, if -not longer. - - - - - CHAPTER XV. - - A DRIVING EXPEDITION IN CORSICA. - - -My position as a servant gave me no opportunity of knowing whether -or not Lord Clement made any attempt to oppose the projected -driving-tour. If he did, however, his interference certainly produced -no effect; for the orders I had received were not countermanded, and -on the following day we three unprotected females departed from -Ajaccio, and set out upon our travels into the interior of the -island. Our conveyance was a light open carriage, with a head that -could be raised or lowered at pleasure. As the trap only held two -people comfortably inside, I sat on the box by the driver; and the -very moderate amount of luggage that accompanied us was fastened -securely at the back of the vehicle. - -It was a beautiful morning, and everything seemed to promise well for -our expedition. Driving in an open carriage was a thing which Mrs. -Rollin greatly affectioned, and always declared it to be impossible -for her ever to tire of; and as she was rendered additionally -complacent by having been able to procure a sufficient stock of -French novels to obviate all risk of dulness, she was in a happy and -contented frame of mind, which Kitty and I--ourselves in the highest -spirits, and ready to make the best of everything--were most anxious -she should retain. - -The scenery was much admired, especially the lovely views that were -to be had, looking back over Ajaccio and the blue waters of its bay. -The small, jet-black, silky-looking sheep were noticed and commented -on; so were the vineyards which we passed, the chestnut, fig, almond, -and olive trees; and, beyond everything, the arbutus bushes, which -called forth many exclamations of admiration and delight. No wonder; -for it really was a sight to see acres and acres of them growing wild -in luxuriant profusion, and covered with magnificent luscious-looking -fruit, whose size and brilliancy of colouring far exceeded that of -any arbutus berries which I have ever seen elsewhere. - -A drive of about three hours brought us to Cauro, where there was -some idea that we should sleep that night, if the inn looked -inviting; if not, we were to go on to St. Marie Sicché. Corsican inns -are generally extremely clean, and the one at Cauro was no exception -to the rule. But alas! it could supply neither milk nor butter, and -nothing in the shape of meat except "merles." - -I was not at all astonished at this, because I had already been told -in Ajaccio that travellers in the island could not rely on finding -meat everywhere, and that at the present time of winter butter and -milk would certainly be unattainable, except at one or two of the -very largest towns. This piece of information had been duly -communicated by me to Kitty; but somehow or other it had not reached -the ears of her aunt, and that good lady was disagreeably surprised -at a scarcity of luxuries for which Kitty and I were quite prepared. -She at once voted for not sleeping at Cauro, but going on to St. -Marie Sicché, where she had no doubt there would be a better stock of -provisions. Of course Kitty and I were not equally sanguine as to -this; but we did not tell her that fact, as she would find out the -state of affairs quite soon enough for herself, and there was -obviously no use in damping her spirits just at the outset of the -expedition. Accordingly, we refreshed ourselves with coffee, eggs, -bread, and fruit, and then continued our journey as soon as the -horses were baited. - -In crossing the Col de San Giorgio there were fine views over the -surrounding country which excited Kitty's artistic instincts; so the -carriage was stopped for her to make a sketch, and meanwhile Mrs. -Rollin buried herself in one of her beloved novels, and I beguiled -the time by talking to the driver, and drawing out his notions as to -things in general connected with his country. I found that he was a -pleasant, conversational individual, who avowed his mercenariness -with unblushing frankness, and laughed at the idea of being expected -to entertain any political opinions of his own. "Celui qui donne le -pain à un Corse, c'est son père," said he; "that's one of our -proverbs. I'm imperialist, royalist, republican, or anything else, -according to who my employer is. Just now I'm whatever pleases your -two ladies, as it is they who pay me." Perceiving that he carried -pistols, I asked him if he did so because of a vendetta--thinking -that in that case it might be a little awkward for us if he should -happen to fall in with an enemy whilst he was in our service; and -that it was as well to know what one had to expect. However, the -unmistakable sincerity with which he disclaimed anything of the kind -put me quite at my ease again. "A vendetta!" he exclaimed; "no -indeed! neither I nor my family have a quarrel with any living -creature. For all that, I never go unarmed on this sort of expedition -because of the _penitenciers_, who manage to get out of prison now -and then." - -"Poor wretches," said I; "I should have thought that they'd be more -afraid of you than you of them. Did they ever do you any harm?" - -"No," he answered, "I've never had any trouble with them myself, but -they _have_ been known to attack carriages, and to be very awkward -customers, too; and as I like to be on the safe side, I always take -arms with me, as you see." - -"Why, one might think these escaped prisoners were regular banditti -to hear you talk," I returned, rather scornfully; for I did not -believe in there being any real ground for alarm on account of -_penitenciers_. - -"Well, and so they are," he replied; "there's plenty of room for any -number of people to hide amongst the various kinds of bushes--_maquis_ -as we call them--which grow wild over the hills and large tracts of -uninhabited waste land. They form almost impenetrable thickets, where -a _penitencier_ has little trouble in keeping out of the way; there -he lives as best he can, subsisting chiefly on the quails and -woodcocks, of which the _maquis_ is full, and helping himself -to the property of other people whenever he gets a chance. For he is -sure to be a _vaurien_." - -I shrugged my shoulders, thinking it would be a long while before -_I_ should take the trouble to carry arms for fear of some Mrs. -Harris of a _penitencier_, who probably had no existence save in the -imaginations of the timid and the credulous. Our conversation ended -there, as Kitty had completed her sketch, and we resumed our course. -That evening I told her of the driver's absurd precautions, and found -she was as much amused at the idea as I was, and we had a good laugh -at the man's excessive prudence. It was, however, a joke which was -not imparted to Mrs. Rollin, as she, being somewhat inclined to be -nervous, might possibly not have regarded the matter in the same -light that we did; and the knowledge of the driver's thinking it -necessary to carry pistols would perhaps have put uncomfortable -notions into her head. Of course anything likely to do that was to be -avoided most carefully; as, if she became alarmed or disgusted in any -way, she might insist on cutting short the expedition, and returning -at once to more civilised places, which would have been a great bore. -I was far more afraid of this happening than of any perils from -_penitenciers_; and I eagerly seconded Kitty's efforts to make -everything smooth and pleasant, and to keep her aunt contented. - -I began to foresee, however, that there would be some difficulty in -doing this for long; and I felt considerable misgivings as to whether -Mrs. Rollin would be induced to carry out the driving-tour programme -in its entirety. The good humour in which she had started in the -morning already showed signs of diminishing. In spite of the -cleanliness of the inns, they were a good deal rougher than she -liked; and though at the hostelry at St. Marie Sicché there was -fortunately some meat, yet she was again obliged to put up with -milkless coffee and butterless bread. It was the latter of these two -grievances to which she especially objected. - -"Though I like _café au lait_ best myself," she said, "still I don't -so much mind drinking black coffee, because that is quite correct, -and a thing that numbers of people do--especially after dinner. But -as for dry bread!--why, that's what paupers in the workhouse have to -eat! I do hope, Kitty, that you won't mention to our friends at home -that we had to put up with such mean food; I shouldn't like it to be -said that I went travelling in places where the people were so poor -or so stingy as not even to afford themselves butter!" - -We both did what we could to pacify her; Kitty by promising -inviolable secrecy, and I by making the landlord rummage out some -_confitures_, which, though but indifferent, would at all events save -her from the reproach of having had to breakfast on dry bread, -whether she liked it or no. This appeased her partially; but still I -saw that her wonted serenity was not altogether restored. - -Up to this point we had been travelling along the highroad used by -the diligences, the _route nationale, royale,_ or _imperiale_, as it is -called, according to which party happens to be in power. But we -turned off from it next day, on leaving St. Marie Sicché, and took to -smaller and inferior roads by which we ascended to higher ground, -until we reached the town of Zicavo, perched on the side of a steep -hill and surrounded by chestnut trees. - -Unluckily the picturesqueness of its situation did not suffice to -reconcile Mrs. Rollin to its deficiency of milk and butter, or to the -roughness of its inn, and she expressed much astonishment that a -town of its importance did not provide better accommodation for -travellers. Another thing that was beginning to annoy her was the -republican equality and disregard for class distinctions which she -found prevailing everywhere, and which were by no means to her taste. -The Corsicans, though perfectly civil and well behaved, were no -respecters of rank, and each one seemed to consider himself quite as -good as any one else. When the driver came in the evening to ask for -his orders for next day, he sat down while talking to the ladies, as -a matter of course; and the landlords of the inns took the same -liberty in their presence, all of which was much to Mrs. Rollin's -disgust. Then, too, she had to do without a private sitting-room, for -the inns had only one room that was not a bedroom, and that one was a -big public room, which served as sitting-room and dining-room to all -classes alike; so that she was obliged either to stay altogether in -her sleeping apartment, or else to condescend to sit at the same -table with the landlord, his family, the driver, me, and any -_commis-voyageur_, shopkeeper, peasant, or other person who might -happen to come in. Besides this, the inquisitiveness which is -characteristic of Corsicans offended her. She could not bear the -freedom with which people whom she considered inferiors would -cross-examine herself and Kitty as to their age; whether they were -married; if not, why not; what they did with themselves; what -relatives they had; where they were going; and similar personal -matters. And as I perceived her growing irritation at these various -petty annoyances, I became more and more doubtful whether we should -be able to reconcile her to them sufficiently to induce her to put -up with them for a whole fortnight. - -One of the reasons which had brought us to Zicavo was the fact that -it was only five or six kilometers from the baths of Guitera, where -there are warm sulphurous springs. Mrs. Rollin, who never willingly -lost an opportunity of bathing in mineral waters, was very anxious -to see what the Guitera baths were like; and if they proved -satisfactory, we should probably remain for a few days at Zicavo, -whence she could drive over and have a daily bathe. Accordingly, on -the day after we got to Zicavo, she and Kitty went to inspect the -bathing establishment at Guitera. However, they found it so wretched -looking a little place, and of so uninviting an exterior, that she at -once declared nothing would induce her to set foot inside it, and -that, as there was nothing to stay for at Zicavo, we had better go on -again immediately in hopes of finding better quarters elsewhere. It -was decided, therefore, that we should next day proceed across the -Serra Scopomeno to St. Lucia di Tallano. We must allow plenty of time -for the journey, we were told, as the roads were heavy, and it was -not impossible we might be hindered by snow. Consequently my -mistresses determined to get off early in the morning, in order to -have the whole day before them. And after giving directions to that -effect, Mrs. Rollin secluded herself and Kitty in their own bedrooms, -and remained there for the rest of the evening, beyond reach of -contamination from the company in the public room. - -I, however, was less particular, and sat there till I went to bed, -fraternising with the landlord's wife, watching all that went on, and -enjoying the opportunity of seeing a little of the manner of life of -a foreign race. It was a novel experience, and that is a thing that I -always like. - -What made it still more interesting was that the landlord was also -_maire_ of the commune, and as he used the public room as his -_bureau_ in which to carry on official transactions, I heard all that -went on between him and the different people who came to see him on -business. He seemed to be a good sort of fellow enough, only with -rather an excessive estimate of his own importance and omniscience. -Just as one of the visitors was going away, he suddenly bethought him -of something that had hitherto slipped his memory, and turned back at -the door. - -"By the by," said he to the _maire_, "some one said yesterday that -they heard there were one or two escaped _penitenciers_ about again -somewhere or other. Have you heard anything about it, and do you -suppose it's true?" - -"True," repeated the _maire_; "of course not! People are always -setting about some foolish report in order to have something to talk -about, and so pretend that they know more than others! No--_I've_ not -heard of it, because it's well known that I make it a rule to pay no -attention to absurd tales unsupported by reliable evidence, and that -makes the tattlers somewhat shy of bringing their stories to _me_. A -pretty state the country would come to if the important officials -were to believe all they're told, and go disturbing themselves about -every idle rumour!" - -I was amused at the _maire's_ evident annoyance at some one else's -having heard this piece of gossip a whole day sooner than he had. -Otherwise I paid no attention to the matter, as I was not in the -least degree apprehensive of _penitenciers_. When a danger occurs but -rarely, the chances are so great against its occurring to any given -person that one is apt to regard it as non-existent. - -Before going to bed that night I repeated the orders that had been -given to have breakfast, our bill, and the carriage, in readiness for -an early start next day, and took care to make sure that they had -been thoroughly understood. Consequently I was provoked to find, when -I left my room in the morning, that the whole household had overslept -itself, and there was no sign of preparation for our departure. - -It was not to be endured that I should incur the stigma of being a -neglectful or incompetent travelling maid--I, who prided myself on my -talents as a courier! so I instantly set to work to arouse the -establishment from its sloth. Hunting about till I discovered where -a servant slept, I dragged her forcibly out of bed, and set her to -light the kitchen fire and prepare food. Then I woke the driver, and -insisted on his beginning at once to get ready the horses and -carriage. In short, I flew hither and thither, helping, hustling, and -exclaiming "Dépêche!" with such vigour that I managed fairly to -startle the leisurely Corsicans into a little activity, and to -procure breakfast for the two ladies, and get under weigh only half -an hour later than had been originally intended. The poor driver was -quite alarmed at my unexpected display of energy; he did not even -venture to wait to break his fast before starting, but hastily -crammed some food into his pocket for consumption on the road. I am -sure it was a relief to him to find that my severity relaxed when -once we were off; and that in order for him to eat his breakfast in -comfort, I was even willing to take the reins and drive, as I sat -beside him on the box. - -The weather was still propitious. Enough snow had fallen in the night -to whiten the tops of the hills surrounding Zicavo, but now the sun -was shining, and warming the keen, delicious mountain air as we drove -down the valley. - -We had not gone far before we met a funeral, which was so perfectly -simple, matter-of-fact, and devoid of anything ostentatious or -needless, that I thought it a model worthy of imitation in less -primitive places. Two mules drew a rough cart, in which lay the -corpse, uncoffined, and covered over with a gaudy-coloured shawl, -which allowed the outlines of the human form beneath to be plainly -visible. After the cart walked a dozen or so of people, betraying no -emotion, but looking serious and stolid. No vestige of black was to -be seen. They were dressed in their ordinary everyday garments, -carrying the bright-hued umbrellas which are popular in the island, -and the men having the customary wine-gourds slung round their -bodies. About the whole thing there was an absence of fuss, ceremony, -and demonstrativeness, combined with perfect gravity and propriety of -demeanour, which made me wish that all arrangers of funerals would -come and take a lesson at Zicavo. - -The only stop we made during the morning was at a tiny little -village, where we waited a few minutes for the horses to be watered. -Whilst this was done, the two ladies and I did not get out of the -carriage, but sat where we were, drawn up outside a miserable -tumble-down sort of hovel that did duty as an inn. The loungers of -the hamlet soon gathered round to stare at us, and were joined by two -men who issued from the house. They both had guns, as I saw; but -there was nothing in the least remarkable about that, because a -Corsican almost always carries a gun _or_ an umbrella, and sometimes -both, so that their being armed did not at all astonish me. Nor did I -think it in any way peculiar when I heard them ask our driver who we -were, and where we were going. For I had by this time seen enough of -Corsican inquisitiveness to regard such inquiries as a mere matter of -course, and demonstrations of curiosity seemed to me more natural -than their absence. - -The two men left the inn almost immediately after their questions had -been answered. I saw them leave the village, and a little way farther -on I caught a glimpse of them again turning off the road, and -plunging into the thick bushes on either side. I concluded that they -were a couple of "chasseurs," such as one sees perpetually in -Corsica, and then thought no more about them. - -Our course at this period of the journey was very tortuous and -indirect, in consequence of numerous narrow valleys which were too -steep for anything on wheels to cross in a straight line. Therefore -the road often had to go round for miles, in order to get from one -side to another of a valley which was, perhaps, not a mile broad; -and the distance from point to point that had to be traversed by -whoever kept to the road was generally many times more than it would -have been to the proverbial crow. Hence it evidently followed that a -pedestrian, climbing straight up and down the precipitous hillsides -would be able to get over the ground as quickly as a carriage could -do. And if this is borne in mind, it will assist the reader in -comprehending the events which I have now to relate. - - - - - CHAPTER XVI. - - ESCAPED PENITENCIERS. - - -The horses were to be taken out of the carriage to have a thorough -rest, once in the course of the day, so we halted for that purpose -between twelve and one o'clock. We were then exactly at the head of -one of the long narrow valleys I have already mentioned. It was a -wild desolate spot, where not a habitation was to be seen, nor any -human being except ourselves. The view before us consisted of the sky -overhead, and of two steep hillsides--at some places appearing to be -barely a gunshot apart--which converged from the entrance of the -valley to the point where we were. These were clothed from top to -bottom with a dense mass of trees and _maquis_, whose sombre -green tints, were only broken by a sharply-cut, thin, yellowish line, -which marked, on one hand, the road we had just traversed, and, on -the other, that by which we should presently continue the journey. -The sun had quite sufficient power to make shade acceptable, so we -seated ourselves under an _ilex_ by the side of a clear bubbling -spring of water, and ate the lunch that we had brought with us from -Zicavo. - -We were not long over the meal, and as soon as it was finished the -driver was asked when he would be ready to resume the journey. He -answered that the horses ought to have more than an hour longer of -rest, and that then they would go on quite fresh to the end of the -day. On hearing this Mrs. Rollin sent me to the carriage to fetch a -couple of cushions, with which she established herself comfortably on -the ground, and then opened one of Xavier de Montepin's novels. -Meanwhile Kitty had got out her drawing materials. - -"I think that I'll walk on, and see if I can't find a sketch -somewhere," she said. "As there's only one road, I can't possibly -lose my way; then you can pick me up when you overtake me in the -carriage." But her aunt was not prepared to assent readily to this -proposal. - -"Oh, you'd better not go on all by yourself, my dear," she said -uneasily. "Do try and find something to draw near here--a cloud or a -tree, or a bit of the road, or something. It's not the thing for a -girl of your age to be seen walking about the roads alone, you know." - -"I don't think that need trouble us in these solitudes," answered -Kitty laughing. "There's nothing except kites and crows to see what I -do, and I don't imagine that _they_ will be much shocked at my -proceedings." - -"Don't you be too sure of there being only kites and crows," returned -Mrs. Rollin; "people often turn up so unexpectedly! There _might_ be -some acquaintance of ours travelling here now; and if so, he or she -would be sure to meet us just when we didn't want to be met, and then -go home and say that I let you go about alone just as you pleased, -and that I took no care whatever of you! Besides, supposing your -sketching were to take you off the road, perhaps we should not see -where you were, and go past without knowing it. I should be in such a -fidget for fear of that happening, that I know I shouldn't enjoy the -drive _a bit_ till I had you all safe with me again." - -"You needn't be uneasy on that score," said Kitty, looking at her -watch; "the jingling of the horses' bells could hardly fail to inform -me of your approach; but I won't trust only to that. I'll keep an eye -on the time, and as I can reckon certainly on your not leaving here -for another hour, I can calculate when to return to the road if I -should turn off it anywhere. I assure you I haven't the least -intention of doing anything so silly as to let myself be left behind, -so you can drive along with a perfectly tranquil mind, and an -absolute certainty that I am somewhere on ahead, until you see me -waiting for you." - -Here I took the liberty of joining in their conversation. Having been -sitting still and cramped up on the box for some time, I felt much -disposed to stretch my legs; so I said, - -"I shall be very glad to accompany Miss Mervyn if she has no -objection. Then I could stay on the road near where she is, if she -happens to leave it; and that would make it quite impossible for the -carriage to go past her by mistake." - -"Of _course_, that's the way to manage it," exclaimed Mrs. Rollin; -"how stupid of me not to have thought of it at first! Yes, Kitty--you -take Jill with you; it will look so much better than for you to be -wandering on by yourself; and then my mind will be quite easy about -not passing you by accident." - -"Very well," returned Kitty; "I'm afraid it'll be rather dull for her -dawdling about at my heels--only I daresay it won't be very lively to -stay here with nothing to do either, so she may as well come. We'll -start at once, Jill, please; for I want to have as much time as -possible for sketching before the carriage overtakes us." - -Accordingly she and I walked off briskly along the road which led -towards our destination, leaving Mrs. Rollin, the driver, and -carriage, to follow in course of time when the horses should be -sufficiently refreshed. We must have tramped, I should think, about -two miles before Kitty came to a place which inspired her with a -desire to make a sketch. Of course the next thing to be done was to -discover the most satisfactory point of view from which the sketch -was to be taken. After a little reconnoitring she found a spot that -was to her mind. It was a short distance below the road, and in -order to get to it we had to scramble down through a mass of arbutus, -and of an immense kind of heath, growing taller than our heads--which -two shrubs constituted the chief part of the scrub (or _maquis_) at -that place. - -Having accompanied Kitty to the spot she had selected, and seen her -comfortably settled down to her drawing, I looked at my watch. This -showed me that there was still a long while to elapse before the -carriage would be in motion again, and that, therefore, there was no -need for me to be in a hurry about getting back to the road yet. -Watching Kitty sketch was not particularly amusing, so I left her and -wandered off through the bushes. About fifty yards from where she was -I came to a bit of broken rocky ground, somewhat resembling a tiny -quarry, and completely overgrown by arbutus. Here I tucked myself -away snugly into a corner under one of these bushes, and lay lazily -contemplating its splendid red and yellow berries, which were as big -as good-sized plums. They looked most delicious; and as I knew the -arbutus is not poisonous, I gathered a berry to ascertain whether the -taste at all corresponded to the appearance; I was disappointed to -find, however, that this was not the case, as the flavour, though -rather sweet, was insipid, watery, and vapid. - -My curiosity respecting arbutus fruit being thus satisfied, and I -having nothing particular to do, I next began amusing myself by -endeavouring to work out a rule-of-three sum in my head. But before -my calculations had advanced far they were interrupted by a crackling -rustling noise that issued from the bushes growing above, between me -and the road. It sounded as if some heavy body were making its way -through them; and the noise approached nearer and nearer, till it -reached quite close to the recess in which I was ensconced. Then the -crackling ceased, and I heard a male voice speaking in low and -cautious tones. A bit of rock, on which grew the bush under which I -was seated, intervened between me and the speaker, so that I could -not see him; but he was near enough for every one of his words to -be distinctly audible to me. He spoke in Italian--that being the -language which the people of the country almost always use amongst -themselves when they do not talk Corsican, though French is the -official tongue, and the one generally employed in communications -with foreigners. - -"But where are they, César?" said the voice, with a somewhat -impatient accent. "You say that from the top of the hill you plainly -saw two of them who left the carriage to repose itself, and went on -alone. Is it not droll how those English always desire to walk? In -that case they ought to be somewhere about here now, yet we have -looked both up and down the road, and they are not there. What then -has become of them? May be that they have turned and gone back -again." - -"_Diavolo_! that would be too provoking," answered César. "It was -unlucky that I lost sight of them as I descended the hill, but it -could not possibly be helped, for the bushes were too thick to see -through." - -"Well, there is sure to be fine spoil to be had out of these rich -English," said the first speaker, "and we must try to get hold of it -somehow. If we fail to find these two by themselves, I suppose we -must do what we thought of at first--manage to upset the carriage at -that sharp corner of the road further on, and attack when all is in -confusion." - -"But what if the carriage should not upset after all?" objected -César; "or what if the driver should carry arms and show fight? Then -perhaps we should be wounded, captured, and shut up again in prison. -Bah! I hate that prison! Have we not been used like dogs there, and -compelled to beat the _maquis_ near Chiavari for _sangliers_, when -some English milord wanted a _chasse_? And is it not an altogether -detestable place? Truly I have no fancy to go there again, and I much -prefer this second plan to the first one that we thought of. We shall -have no danger to fear in dealing with only two women. Let us on no -account be foolhardy, Napoleon." - -"Certainly not," answered Napoleon; "I have no more wish than you -have either to go back to prison or to encounter needless peril! -Still, it will be a pity if we cannot secure the golden prize that -destiny throws in our way. Those two must be somewhere not far off at -this very moment, unless by bad luck they should have turned back -just after you first saw them. Do you think they can have gone off -from the road?" "It is possible," returned César; "anyhow, it is too -soon yet to despair of finding them. Do you, Napoleon, go and watch -on the road, whilst I search the _maquis_ on each side, first below -and then above. Whichever of us discovers them can summon the other -by a whistle." - -"Good," replied Napoleon. And with that the two men separated and -went off in different directions, as I knew by the rustling of the -bushes. - -Here, then, were two villains in search of Kitty and me, with evil -intentions towards us, and we were quite defenceless. Truly, a -pleasant predicament to be in! What was I to do now? - -Had I been able to reason out at leisure what course a person ought -to pursue in such a situation, I feel sure that my answer to the -above question would have been: Take care of your own safety, keep -out of the men's clutches the best way you can, and do not bother -yourself about any one else. But when the situation actually -occurred, I acted on the impulse of the moment, because there was -no time to think the matter over carefully, and take counsel with -reason. And the consequence of being in such a hurry was, that I did -not behave with that prudent regard to my own interests which was -generally characteristic of me. I was frightened I must candidly -confess, and I desired ardently to be anywhere in security, and to -avoid meeting either Napoleon or César. Yet, strange to say, I was -influenced at that moment by something else than care for myself. My -predominant anxiety--the one object on which my mind was fixed--was, -to get to Kitty as quickly as possible, to warn her of the danger, to -stand by her, to try to save her. It was certainly very unlike -me to have felt like that, and I do not know what occasioned so -extraordinary a departure from my usual sentiments. However, there -the feeling was, and "_c'était plus fort que moi_." Consequently, I -only waited where I was till the men were far enough off for me to -leave my hiding-place without danger of being discovered, and then -instantly set out to rejoin her. Taking the utmost pains to move -quietly, lest the shaking of the bushes should betray my presence, -I crept through the _maquis_. Meanwhile I mentally reviewed the -situation, and considered how we could extricate ourselves from it. - -I inferred, from what the men had said, that they were not particularly -brave, and would probably not venture to attack the carriage if they -found its occupants prepared to receive them. Therefore, if we could -get safely back to our driver and put him on his guard, there would -not be much to fear from the rascals. But then the question was, -_could_ we get back safely? could we, by crawling through bushes, -dodging behind trees, and keeping out of sight as much as possible, -retrace our steps to the carriage unperceived? On the whole, I -thought it was to be managed--provided, of course, that I could -reach Kitty and get her away before either of our enemies had found -her. As they did not know that they were detected, they would expect -to meet us going about carelessly and openly, without the least -attempt at concealment. This was all in our favour, as it would -prevent them from looking for us as closely as they would otherwise -have done. Besides, if they did not find us in that immediate -neighbourhood, they would discontinue the search, under the -impression that we must have returned to the carriage almost directly -after leaving it. Therefore it would be only necessary for us to keep -in hiding till we had got some distance from where we then were; -after that, we could leave the _maquis_, and take to the road, where -we should be able to run along at full speed, without troubling to -keep out of sight. - -As I thought of all this, it seemed to me that we had a very -reasonable prospect of escape--unless, by bad luck, I should fail -to get to Kitty before one of the men had found her--everything -appeared to me to depend upon that. - -I had left her on a small open space which jutted out a little from -the hillside, so as to form a sort of diminutive plateau. Great was -my relief, when I came to the edge of this place, to see her still -sketching happily, and evidently without a suspicion of danger. She -glanced towards me for an instant, and then at once resumed her work, -thinking that I was come to fetch her away, and that she must make -the most of every remaining moment. Thus her eyes were upon the -drawing, and so she did not see the gesture which I made to her to be -silent, lest an enemy should be within hearing. - -"Is it time to go, already?" she said, speaking out loud, as it was -natural she should do. "Isn't your watch--" - -By that time I was within reach of her, and stopped further utterance -forcibly by covering her mouth with my hand. Looking up in surprise -and wrath at so unceremonious a proceeding on the part of her maid, -she saw by my face that there was something seriously amiss. I began -to tell her in a whisper, as fast as I could, what was the state of -affairs. - -Unluckily the few words she had spoken had wrought the mischief I -feared, and showed our whereabouts to one of the villains who were -hunting for us. Consequently, I had hardly commenced my hurried -communication in her ear, when a low whistle sounded close by, and -next moment a man with a gun in his hand stepped out of the bushes, -and on to the little plateau where we were. This, then, was no doubt -the rogue named César, whom I had heard undertake to explore the -_maquis_ for us. As I looked at him, I recognised him to be one of -the two men whom I had noticed inquiring about us two or three hours -before, at the inn where the horses had been watered. That at once -made the whole matter clear to me. - -I have already mentioned that the nature of the ground was such as -to enable a pedestrian to travel from point to point as fast as a -carriage could do. Knowing this, César and his companion must have -made up their minds to hurry on in front, and lie in wait for us at -some spot which we had not yet reached, and which they deemed -especially favourable for an attack on the carriage. But on their way -to the place that they had chosen for an ambush, they had evidently -caught sight of Kitty and me leaving the carriage, and been diverted -from their first scheme by the hope of securing the coveted booty -in a less hazardous manner than the one they had originally -contemplated. It was all as plain as a pike-staff to me now. - -César accosted us in French, saying, in the regular beggar's whine, -"Will the ladies have the goodness to give something to a poor man?" - -Though I had not had time fully to explain things to Kitty, she had -picked up enough to know that we were in danger from two escaped -_penitenciers_, and when she saw César she guessed that he was one -of them. - -This sudden confronting with peril, however, produced in her no -trepidation, sign of cowardice, or inclination to quail. She was too -proud for that. Her compressed lips, flashing eyes, and hard, -resolute, disdainful, undaunted expression, showed a nature that -would set its back to the wall (not that there was one handy on the -present occasion, however), and fight to the last gasp, but would -never flinch an atom, come what might. - -"I have nothing for you," she replied, speaking as haughtily as -though we had been in no way in the man's power. - -"But I feel sure that Madame deceives herself," insisted César, who -apparently did not wish to proceed to extremities till the arrival of -his comrade Napoleon; "if she will have the complaisance to seek, she -will without doubt discover money, a watch, rings, brooches, chains, -or some such little thing that would keep a poor man from dying of -hunger." - -At this point in the conversation, it occurred to me that a good loud -scream for help might be introduced with singular appropriateness; -and I proceeded to put my idea into execution. César, however, was of -a different opinion, and evidently considered the interruption an -untimely one; for no sooner did I uplift my voice, than he aimed his -gun at me, exclaiming savagely, "Silence at once, or I'll kill you!" - -I had no option about obeying this order, because just at that -moment, Napoleon--who was hastening up in obedience to his companion's -summons--came through the bushes behind where I stood, and clapped -his hand roughly over my mouth. - -César grinned mockingly when he saw me thus reduced to silence, and -lowered his gun again. - -"That was an atrocious noise!" he remarked. "Permit me to inform you, -madame--first, that screams cannot assist you, since there is no one -but us within hearing; secondly, that my friend and myself have -inconceivably tender hearts and sensitive nerves. Consequently we -cannot endure the least sound of distress; and if you should -utter another cry in our presence, we should be compelled, most -reluctantly, to cut your throat in order to spare the exquisite -sensibility of our natures. And having given you this caution, let us -return to the more pleasing subject of the little _souvenirs_ which -you generous ladies are going to bestow upon us. Will you like us to -save you trouble by helping ourselves to them?" - -Kitty was as composed as though she had been seated in her father's -drawing-room in Eaton Square, and now said to me in English: - -"I'm afraid he's right about there being no one in hearing to help -us, Jill, so it's no good screaming. As resistance is useless, we may -as well give up our purses and trinkets quietly." Then she continued -in French, replying to what the man had said last: "No--you need not -help yourselves. We will hand over to you all we have." - -Accordingly we pulled out our money, and took off the few things of -any value we happened to be wearing--such as watches, chains, and -collar and sleeve studs. These, however, were worth but little, all -put together. People do not take valuable jewellery with them on a -rough driving-tour; and as Mrs. Rollin was our treasurer, Kitty and I -had barely ten francs between us in our purses. The two robbers, -therefore, who had been reckoning confidently on making a large haul, -were greatly dissatisfied and disappointed at the insignificance -of the booty they had secured. - -"This won't do _at all_," grumbled César; "the idea of capturing a -couple of the rich English, and then not getting more than _this_ out -of them! It is ridiculous! Let us see what is to be done--only first -they must be kept from running away." - -And then, after making fast our hands and feet, they drew a few steps -aside, and proceeded to confer together in a low voice. - -Though they had spoken to us in French, yet in their communications -to one another they used Italian. Noticing this, it occurred to me -that if they were to suppose us both to be ignorant of that tongue, -they would probably talk more freely before us than they would do if -they thought we understood what was said; in this way we might, -perhaps, pick up valuable information; or at least _I_ might--for -Kitty's knowledge of Italian was very limited. I at once imparted my -idea to her, and suggested we should pretend that we understood only -French. I expected she would assent to this as a matter of course; -but, to my surprise, she hesitated, and her face showed that the -proposition was distasteful to her. - -"Well--I don't know," she replied, after a minute's consideration, -"I can't allow a couple of scamps to make me degrade myself by -telling a lie. If they ask me whether I understand them or not, I -shall most certainly tell them the truth." - -I was dismayed at this clinging to principles of scrupulous honour in -dealing with the two rogues who had us in their power. Her sentiments -were very chivalrous and noble, no doubt; but they appeared to me -both uncalled-for and out of place at the present moment, and I -endeavoured to combat them. "Surely," I said, "you don't deny the -truth of the old saying that all is fair in love and war?" - -Her lip curled scornfully as she replied, "That has nothing to do -with it. To my mind a lie would be none the less _mean_ because it -might be _fair_. I should lose my self-respect if I were to tell -one." - -Even whilst smarting at the reproof which was thus conveyed to me for -having advocated lying, I could not help admiring the indomitable -pride which was unaffected by considerations of expediency, and would -under no circumstances consent to do what was contrary to its sense -of dignity. The hankering after her good opinion which I always felt -made me wonder uneasily what she would think of me if she knew how -many untruths my self-respect had managed to put up with during my -existence. And then I felt half-disgusted with my past conduct, and -it flashed upon me that I had a great mind to turn over a new leaf in -the matter in future, and behave more according to the principles -which she approved of and practised. That, however, should be -reserved for further consideration, as the present was obviously not -a favourable occasion for inaugurating any reform of the kind. Having -arrived at which conclusion, I silently resolved to carry out my plan -for deceiving our captors, if possible, in spite of her objection. -Consequently, when one of them, speaking in Italian, asked which of -us two ladies was the most important one, I affected to be utterly -unconscious of having been addressed. Kitty, fortunately, was seated -farther off from the man than I was, and did not hear what he said, -or discover that he was not still continuing the conversation with -his comrade. - -The man repeated his question a second time in Italian. Finding that -we both remained mute, he asked in French how long it would be before -he had an answer. I hastened to reply to this, speaking quickly and -in a low tone, lest Kitty should hear what I said, and be prompted by -her inconveniently high-flown sentiments to contradict me flatly. I -made believe to be quite astonished to find he had been speaking to -us, and most anxious to deprecate his wrath--assuring him that we -neither of us understood Italian, and begging him to excuse us, -therefore, for the involuntary rudeness of which we had been -guilty in not responding to his question. Luckily my precaution of -speaking indistinctly, and the fact of Kitty's being a few yards -off, prevented her from catching what passed between me and my -interlocutor. The two men then came and stood in front of us, and -Napoleon said in French, "We want to know which of you two ladies is -of the most importance--the chief one?" - -"I am," answered Kitty. - -"Good," he returned; "then it is to you that I will speak. We know -that you cannot be travelling about with no more money than 10 -francs, and that you English are always rolling in gold. It follows, -therefore, that your riches must be in the keeping of that other lady -who stayed with the carriage. Now, those riches we must and will -have, and we propose that you shall earn your liberty by helping us -to get them. Will you do this?" - -"Tell me what you want me to do, first," answered Kitty; "then I will -tell you whether I will do it or not." - -"Very reasonable!" replied Napoleon. "Our plan is this. You must -write to your friend in the carriage such a note as will induce her -to follow the bearer at once, in order to join you. The note will be -entirely in French, and contain not a word of English, so as to make -sure that you say nothing in it that we do not approve of. One of us -will take it to her; then he will conduct her to a safe spot, and -relieve her of the money and trinkets that she has. Should the worth -of these be sufficient to satisfy our just expectations, you will -none of you be detained any longer." - -"And supposing the spoil is less than you anticipate," inquired -Kitty, "what then?" - -"Ah--but that cannot be, I feel sure!" he returned; "our expectations -are most moderate; it cannot be that three ladies would travel about -so far from their own country without having with them as much money -as would satisfy us!" - -"Still I repeat my question," she said; "what would you do if _not_? -And, in any case, what certainty have I that you would keep your word -and release us afterwards?" - -"If madame will not rely on our word of honour," answered he, smiling -disagreeably, "I fear she will have to content herself without that -certainty which she desires. _She_ is hardly in the position to -enforce any other guarantee of good faith; and _we_ shall not insult -ourselves by assuming such a thing to be necessary. And as for the -quite unlikely event of your friend's purse being insufficient to -meet our wants--why--ahem! when the case arises, it will be then -ample time to settle what is to be done. Here are paper and a pencil. -There is no time to lose. Will madame be so good as to write?" - -Kitty looked at him steadily, without attempting to take the writing -materials he proffered. "And do you suppose, then," she said, "that I -shall consent to bait a trap to bring my aunt to be robbed? If so, -you are very greatly mistaken. And what inducement have you to offer -that should make me do so vile a thing? The mere chance that your -thirst for plunder might then be satiated, and that you might think -fit to set us free! I do not trust to your honour, nor will I do what -you wish. I believe that the plan is merely a _ruse_ to enable you to -secure a fresh victim, and that if you could get my aunt also into -your hands, you would keep us all three prisoners." - -This accusation was met with vehement denials; and our captors -again endeavoured to persuade her to assist them by assuring her it -would be to her advantage to do so, and threatening her with evil -consequences if she persisted in her refusal. Finding, however, that -she remained unmoved by whatever they said, they bethought them that -perhaps _I_ might be made to write such a letter as they required, -and applied to me accordingly. Kitty, on this, gave me peremptory -orders that I was on no account to comply with their request; and I -obeyed her in the matter all the more willingly because I had very -little doubt that her surmise was correct as to the treachery which -the scoundrels had in contemplation. - -But however much Mrs. Rollin might benefit from our refusal to lend -ourselves to their designs, it certainly did not help us in any way. -The two men had made up their minds that they were going to get -enormous spoils out of "these rich English," and had no idea of -resigning their hopes merely because Kitty and I would not aid them -to execute their first scheme. Therefore, when they saw they had no -chance of carrying their point about that, they determined to adopt -another line of action, which was announced to us by César. - -People so unaccommodating and perverse as we were, he said angrily, -deserved to be got rid of altogether; and in such a case as this, -most gentlemen of the road would not be troubled with us any longer, -but cut our throats without ceremony, and so make an end of the -business at once. He and his friend, however, being of so gentle a -disposition as never to resort to violence _if it could be helped_, -would give us a chance of escape. It was their intention to -communicate with our friends, and offer to restore us uninjured on -payment of a specified sum, which would have to be handed over with -such precautions as would ensure the safety of the recipients. Till -that was received we should reside under their care in the hills. -"But," added the ruffian menacingly, and addressing himself -especially to Kitty, "we cannot wait for ever for the answer, you -know, so we shall tell your friends that if the ransom is not -forthcoming pretty quickly, we shall try to hasten its arrival by -sending some little reminder, such as an ear, a nose, a hand, or a -foot; and of course these souvenirs would, in the first place, be -furnished by you, since you are of more consequence than your -companion. Hers would come later." - -When I heard this I could not repress a shudder at the peril awaiting -my cherished members--though, as those of Kitty were destined to be -sacrificed first, the danger to mine was only a reversionary one. -She, however, who was more immediately threatened than I was, neither -trembled, changed colour, nor gave any other indication of emotion, -but remained as unmoved and haughtily composed as before. - -I did not forget that she had been affected by some feeling too -strong to be concealed when I had suddenly showed her the photograph -of Captain Norroy. And the difference between her demeanour then -and now made me wonder more than ever what the feeling could have -been which had had power to upset the self-command of a person -so high-couraged, strong, and proudly imperturbable as she most -certainly was. - - - - - END OF VOL. I. - - - - - _Printed by_ R. & R. 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A. Dillwyn—A Project Gutenberg eBook</title> - <link rel="coverpage" href="images/cover.jpg"/> - <meta name="cover" content="images/cover.jpg" /> - <meta name="DC.Title" content="Jill"/> - <meta name="DC.Creator" content="Elizabeth Amy Dillwyn"/> - <meta name="DC.Language" content="en"/> - <meta name="DC.Created" content="1884"/> - <meta name="DC.Subject" content="Fiction"/> - <meta name="Pubdate" content="1884"/> - <meta name="Tags" content="Fiction"/> - - <style type="text/css"> - - body - { - margin-left:9%; - margin-right:9% - } - - p - { - margin-top:0.75em; - text-align:justify; - text-indent:1.5em; - } - .noindent - { - text-indent:0; - } - - h1 - { - text-align:center; - font-weight:normal; - font-size:2em; - margin:2em auto 1em auto; - } - h2 - { - text-align:center; - font-weight:normal; - font-size:1.2em; - margin:1em auto 0.5em auto; - margin-top:1.5em; - page-break-before:always; - } - - em - { - font-style:italic; - font-weight:normal; - } - - i.name - { - font-style:italic; - } - - i.loanword - { - font-style:italic; - } - - .smcap - { - font-variant:small-caps; - } - - .poetry-container - { - text-align:center; - } - - .poetry - { - display:inline-block; - text-align:left; - } - - .x-ebookmaker .poetry - { - display:block; - margin-left: 1.5em; - } - - .poetry .verse - { - text-indent:-3em; - padding-left:3em; - } - - .poetry .indent2 - { - text-indent:-2.6em; - } - - .letter - { - margin-left:1.5em; - margin-right:1.5em; - } - .rightalign - { - text-align:right; - margin-right:1.5em; - } - .centre - { - text-align:center; - } - .spaceabove - { - margin-top:3em; - } - hr.pbk - { - border:none; - border-bottom:1px solid silver; - width:100%; - margin-top:2em; - margin-bottom:2em; - page-break-after:always; - } - - .toc - { - margin:auto; - } - - .toc th - { - text-align:right; - font-weight:normal; - font-size:small; - } - - .toc td - { - padding-top:0.75em; - vertical-align:top; - } - .toc td.chaptitle - { - text-align:left; - padding-right:0.5em; - } - - .image-centre - { - text-align:center; - margin:2em auto; - } - - #coverpage - { - border:1px solid silver; - } - - </style> - - </head> - <body> -<p style='text-align:center; font-size:1.2em; font-weight:bold'>The Project Gutenberg eBook of Jill, by E. A. Dillwyn</p> -<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and -most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms -of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online -at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you -are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the -country where you are located before using this eBook. -</div> - -<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: Jill</p> -<p style='display:block; margin-left:2em; text-indent:0; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:1em;'>Vol. I (of 2)</p> - <p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: E. A. Dillwyn</p> -<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: July 3, 2021 [eBook #65755]</p> -<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</p> - <p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em; text-align:left'>Produced by: anonymous Project Gutenberg volunteers</p> -<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK JILL ***</div> - -<hr class="pbk" /> - -<div class="image-centre"> - <img id="coverpage" src="images/cover.jpg" alt="Book cover" /> -</div> - -<hr class="pbk" /> - -<h1>JILL</h1> - -<p class="centre spaceabove"><small>BY</small><br /> - -E. A. DILLWYN</p> - -<p class="centre spaceabove">IN TWO VOLUMES.—VOL. I.</p> - -<p class="centre spaceabove">London<br /> -MACMILLAN AND CO.<br /> -1884</p> - -<p class="centre"><i><small>All rights reserved.</small></i></p> - -<hr class="pbk" /> - -<p class="centre spaceabove"><small><i>Printed by</i> <span class="smcap">R. & R. Clark,</span> <i>Edinburgh.</i></small></p> - -<hr class="pbk" /> - -<h2>CONTENTS.</h2> - -<table summary="Contents" class="toc"> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER I.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td></td> - <td><small>PAGE</small></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">Jill introduces herself</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c1">1</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER II.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">Foreign Travel</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c2">16</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER III.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">A Widow's Manœuvres</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c3">29</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER IV.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">A Tight Curb</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c4">38</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER V.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">Breaking Loose</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c5">54</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER VI.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">A Photograph</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c6">71</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER VII.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">A few London Prices</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c7">86</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER VIII.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">A Street Incident</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c8">104</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER IX.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">A Nervous Lady</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c9">113</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER X.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">Change of Situation</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c10">129</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER XI.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">An Unwelcome Admirer</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c11">147</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER XII.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">The Photograph Again</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c12">166</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER XIII.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">Lord Clement</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c13">178</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER XIV.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">At Ajaccio</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c14">194</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER XV.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">A Driving Expedition through Corsica</td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c15">205</a></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td colspan="2" class="centre">CHAPTER XVI.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class="chaptitle smcap">Escaped <span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Penitenciers</span></td> - <td class="rightalign"><a href="#c16">221</a></td> - </tr> -</table> - -<hr class="pbk" /> - -<h2 id="c1">CHAPTER I.<br /> - -<small>JILL INTRODUCES HERSELF.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">I have heard people say that men are more apt to be of an adventurous -disposition than women, but that is an opinion from which I differ. I -suppose it has arisen because timidity and sensitiveness are hostile -to the spirit of enterprise, checking its growth and development, -and not unfrequently proving altogether fatal to it; and as these -qualities are especially characteristic of the weaker sex, it follows -naturally that noted female adventurers are less common than male -ones. But that seems only to show that an unfavourable soil has -caused the plant to become blighted or smothered, and is no conclusive -proof that the seed was never sown. It is my belief that the aforesaid -spirit is distributed by nature impartially throughout the human race, -and that she implants it as freely in the breast of the female as in -that of the male. Once let it be implanted, and let it have fair -play, untrammelled by nervous, hesitating, shrinking, home-clinging -tendencies, and it will infallibly lead its possessor to some bold -departure from the everyday routine of existence that satisfies -mortals of a more hum-drum temperament. A craving for continual -change and excitement is a thing that is sure to assert itself -vigorously and insist on being gratified, provided its possessor -has also plenty of health and courage, and is unrestrained by the -fetters formed from strong domestic attachments or other affection. -Of people thus positively and negatively endowed it may be confidently -predicted—whether their gender be masculine or feminine—that -adventures will bestrew their road plentifully, meeting them at every -turn, and seeming to seek them out and be attracted to them even as -flies unto honey. I am myself an instance of this, as I can see -plainly enough in reviewing my past career. At an earlier period I -was less clear-sighted, and failed to perceive the restless spirit -that had taken possession of me and become the constraining power -of my life; but the lapse of a few years is a wonderful aid to -discerning the true motives of former actions, and reminds me in this -way of the dark blue spectacles which the man in charge of a smelting -furnace puts on when he wants to see what is going on in his furnace. -Without them he can distinguish nothing in the fiery interior; but -the spectacles have the effect of softening the fierce, blinding -glare, rendering visible what was before invisible, and enabling him -to watch the progress of the red-hot seething masses of ore and metal -undergoing fusion and transmutation under his care. And in like manner -does intervening time clear the vision towards events, so that it -is possible to estimate them far more justly some while after they -have taken place, than it was at the moment of their occurrence. A -retrospect, therefore, gives me a more correct notion of myself than -I had before. I see how often, when I imagined myself to be solely -impelled by some purely external circumstance, I was, in reality, -also obeying the dictates of a longing for adventure and impatience -of sameness, which have always had a very strong influence in -determining my conduct. I detect how love of variety manifested -itself as the principal cause of my actions, and made my course -deviate widely from that of other ladies in my rank of life, and -furnishes a reasonable explanation for behaviour which would else -seem unaccountable. To a person of this disposition, monotony, -dullness, and boredom in every shape are of course absolutely -intolerable; consequently I do not believe that any position -involving these drawbacks will ever content me for long, even -though it may, in other respects, afford every advantage that the -heart of man (or woman) can desire. And having supplied the reader -with this much clue to a comprehension of the character of the -individual whose story lies before him, I leave all further judgment -upon me to be pronounced according to what is found in the pages of -this veracious history, wherein I purpose faithfully to depict -myself exactly as I appear in my own eyes, and as my life shows -me to be.</p> - -<p>A person's identity is materially affected (as regards both himself -and others) by that of the immediate ancestors without whom he or -she would not have existed at all; so the first step towards my -self-introduction must obviously be to state my parentage.</p> - -<p>My father, Sir Anthony Trecastle, a gentleman of small fortune -serving in the Life Guards, was employed in London discharging the -not very onerous duties expected from an officer of Heavies in time -of peace, when he became acquainted and enamoured with a daughter of -Lord Gilbert's. Sir Anthony's means were not sufficiently large for -him to be reckoned anything of a matrimonial catch in that set of -society to which both he and the young lady he admired belonged. He -had enough to live upon, however, besides being a tenth baronet, -rather good-looking, and the representative of a family whose name -was to be found in the Domesday Book; therefore her relations and -friends considered him to be a respectable though not brilliant -match, made no attempt to interfere either for or against his suit, -and left her perfectly free to please herself as to the answer it -should receive. It was long before she could make up her mind in the -matter; but, after considering it for more than a year, she at last -determined to accept him. What may have moved her to do this of -course I cannot say; but all I know of her character makes me think -it more likely for the decision to have resulted from a reasonable -and deliberate consideration of matrimonial pros and cons than from -any love for her husband. Those who knew her well believed her to be -so singularly cold and indifferent as never to have warmed into real -love for any living creature during her whole life. And not only do -my own recollections of her corroborate this opinion, but also I may -say that I myself am a living argument to prove it true, inasmuch as -I, too, am unusually exempt from the affectionate, tender emotions -to which most men and women are liable; and it seems reasonable to -suppose that this extraordinary cold-heartedness of mine must have -been inherited from her.</p> - -<p>I am sure it is an inheritance for which I have had much reason to be -thankful; for I have no doubt it has saved me from many a folly that -I should otherwise have committed. A warm-hearted, soft, affectionate -disposition is a possession which I have never coveted. It has -generally seemed to me to be a cause of weakness rather than of -strength to its owner; and besides, it is very apt to hinder and -stunt the development of that source of delight—the spirit of -enterprise.</p> - -<p>This, however, is somewhat of a digression, as the extent to which -my mother may have cared for my father does not much concern this -narrative; at any rate she liked him sufficiently well to marry him, -and that is all with which we need trouble ourselves here. He sold -out of the army soon afterwards, and took his bride to reside at -Castle Manor, as his country place was called; there I, their only -child, was born. Had I been a boy it was intended to call me Gilbert, -in honour of my maternal grandfather's title; as, however, I was a -girl, and as my parents still wished to adhere as far as possible -to their original intention of naming their first-born after the -Gilbert peerage, the name was adapted to my sex by the addition of -three letters, and thus I received at my christening the somewhat -uncouth appellation of Gilbertina. As this was obviously too much of -a mouthful to be convenient for common domestic use, an abbreviation -was inevitable, and the first one bestowed upon me was Jill. But this -did not find favour with my mother. She declared it was ugly, and -objectionably suggestive of low, republican ideas, such as carrying -pails of water, rough tumbles, and cracked crowns; therefore Jill was -condemned and Ina substituted, as a more graceful and aristocratic -manner of shortening my name.</p> - -<p>Though I allude to this small matter, because Jill was the name to -which I afterwards returned, yet I do not purpose to dwell long upon -the history of my life up to the age of eighteen, at which period I -launched out boldly upon an independent career. Still, however, the -earlier stages cannot be left altogether unnoticed, as the events -which took place then naturally have a bearing upon subsequent ones, -and also may be thought interesting for the part they probably played -in the moulding of my character.</p> - -<p>Was I born destitute of the ordinary instincts of filial affection—in -which case, be it observed, that it would be most unjust to blame me -for what was simply a natural deficiency? Or is the fault of my -defect in that way to be charged to my parents for having done -nothing to develop the above-mentioned instinct? Anyhow, whatever -the cause may have been, certain it is that they and I were mutually -indifferent, and never saw more of one another than we could possibly -help. They went their way, and I went mine, and the less we came in -contact the better was I pleased. I regarded my mother as a sort of -stranger whom the accident of inhabiting the same house caused me to -see oftener than any other stranger, and who had an authority over me -and my affairs which was decidedly irksome, because our opinions as -to what it was right and fitting that I should do or not do were -always at variance with one another. She disliked untidiness, -whereas I revelled in being in a mess. Consequently she aggravated -me continually by insisting on my going off to wash my face and hands -or have my clothes put tidy, when I thought they did very well as -they were, and would have preferred staying where I was. Again, -mud-larking, and many other of my favourite occupations which -brought about a torn and dirty state of garments, were strictly -forbidden by her, to my great annoyance. Imagining the restriction -to be imposed solely in the interests of my clothes, I well remember -how rejoiced I was one day when I thought I had hit upon a plan for -enjoying myself after my own fashion without offending against her -code, and how disappointed I was when my scheme proved a failure. I -was about ten years old at the time, and was standing at the edge of -a small stream, longing with my whole heart to go and paddle about in -it, when it suddenly struck me that, as the edict against mud-larking -and similar amusements was grounded upon the harm they did to my -apparel, there could certainly be no objection to them provided -nothing suffered except my own skin—that being an article which -was surely of no consequence to any one but myself. Inspired by -this brilliant idea, I immediately took off my shoes, stockings, -gloves, and drawers, turned my sleeves back to the shoulder, wound -my petticoats round my waist, and plunged into the stream; there I -waded about with the utmost satisfaction, constructing mud-docks and -sailing bark-boats without in the least minding the cuts and bruises -inflicted on my bare feet by stones, or the numerous scratches which -my unprotected arms and legs received from overhanging bushes and -brambles. What did that matter when I was having such a glorious -mud-lark? And I enjoyed the fun all the more because I believed -fondly that I had a prospect of plenty more of the same kind in the -future, now that I had so cleverly discovered the way to get over the -objection that had hitherto interfered with it. It must be clearly -impossible for any one to find fault with a proceeding which exposed -nothing but my own flesh to risks of rents and dirt.</p> - -<p>Alas! however, I was destined speedily to be undeceived. My mother, -hearing how I had been engaged, gave me a tremendous scolding, -declaring that she was quite shocked at me, and that if ever I -did such a thing again I should be punished. For my part, I was -perfectly amazed at this indignation, which seemed to me totally -unreasonable, as I could not imagine what harm I had done. And the -incident, like all others connected with her, strengthened the sulky -injured feeling I had of being always wrong in her eyes. No matter -what I might wish to do, she would forbid it, I thought.</p> - -<p>I do not know that she was wilfully unkind to me, perhaps; but she -certainly never was actively kind; and she stands out in my memory as -a cold hard figure with which I could not come in contact without -finding myself thwarted in some way or other, and being deprived of -some pleasure. "Don't do that!" is a sentence odious in childish -ears; and as that was the sentence that I heard oftener than any -other from her lips, I naturally got into the habit of avoiding her -company as much as possible—which was all the easier to manage -because she had as little wish for my society as I had for hers, and -only endured me with her at all, I think, out of regard to the -<i class="loanword">convenances</i> of English life. Never once do I remember her to have -taken the trouble to supply me with any pleasures which she approved -of to replace those which she prohibited; nor did she ever bestow -upon me presents, indulgences, or marks of affection. Though she -never attempted to teach me anything herself, yet she had me do -lessons, and insisted on my learning needlework, which was my -especial aversion; and I knew she was the source for the tasks I -hated, even though she did not personally impose them on me.</p> - -<p>Such being the terms on which she and I stood to one another, is it -to be wondered at that I should have feared and disliked her?</p> - -<p>I was about twelve years old when she died. As I had by that time -read with great interest a large number of juvenile story-books of -the exaggerated sentimental and goody kind, I was thoroughly well -up in the behaviour to be expected from any girl-heroine on the -occurrence of such an event. I knew that her father would at once -become the great object of her life, and that she would devote -herself utterly to the task of comforting him and endeavouring to -replace Her (with a capital H) who was gone. Though the girl would -of course be herself well-nigh crushed with grief, and indulge in -paroxysms of sobs and tears whenever she was alone, yet she would -heroically repress any public manifestation of distress, lest the -knowledge and sight of it should increase that of her surviving -parent. Her zeal on his behalf would know no bounds, and lead her -to neglect the most ordinary precautions against illness for -herself. This would appear in some absurd and wholly uncalled for -act of self-devotion—such as sitting motionless for hours in a -thorough draught and wet through, lest the sound of her moving -might awake him as he slept in the next room, or something equally -ridiculous; and by a few insane performances of the same kind the way -would easily be paved for the invariably thrilling climax. A pillow -bedewed nightly with tears; knife-like stabs of pain returning with -increasing frequency; blood-spitting neglected and kept secret; pangs -mental and bodily, concealed under a cheerful exterior; there could -be but one conclusion to such symptoms as these. The overtaxed -strength would collapse suddenly; consumption, decline, heart -disease, or some other alarming illness, would ensue; and then there -would be either a few harrowing deathbed scenes, or else a miraculous -recovery and happy marriage of the heroine; in this last case her -spouse would of course be some paragon young man, who should be in -every respect ideally perfect, and thoroughly able to appreciate and -do justice to the treasure whom he had been so fortunate as to win -for a wife.</p> - -<p>So invariably did this style of thing take place whenever the heroine -lost her mother in the books which I had devoured greedily without -perceiving how morbid and exaggerated they were, and without doubting -their being faithful representations of human nature, that I had a -sort of hazy impression of its being the inevitable accompaniment -of that loss, whatever might have been the terms hitherto existing -between the parties concerned. The folly of supposing that I could -feel deep regret for a person whom I had always avoided as much as -possible never occurred to me, and I was disposed to believe that -what was described in the stories was an indispensable sequence of -events that came after one another as naturally as spring follows -winter, and summer follows spring. In that case, I too, must expect -to undergo the regular course of emotions like every one else. It -would be a decidedly novel and mysterious experience, and one that -I was by no means sure would be pleasant, and I looked out anxiously -for the first indications of its approach as though it had been -some kind of sickness with which I was threatened. A gush of poignant -grief for my mother, an intense yearning over and pity for my father, -sleepless nights and untasted meals, were, I knew, the correct -preliminaries to the state of affairs that I was anticipating. Two -or three days passed, however, and I found to my surprise that I had -still no inability to sleep and eat as usual; no alteration in my -former feelings about my parents, either living or deceased; nor any -other reason to think I was about to behave in the same manner as -those sentimental young ladies about whom I had read. Then I became -perplexed as to the cause of this difference between me and them. -I had taken it for granted that the stories showed exactly how -human beings in general thought, felt, and acted; but how came it -then that I, who was unquestionably a human being, should find my -own experience of a great occasion of this kind so different from -what the books depicted? The only way of accounting for it was by -supposing either that they were not as true to nature as I -had believed, or else that I must be unlike the rest of my -fellow-creatures; and as it did not at all please me to consider -myself an abnormal variety of the human species, I adopted the former -theory as the probable explanation of what puzzled me. No one, -thought I, ever dreams of judging fairy-tales by the standard of -real life; and no doubt those stories that I fancied were true are -in reality only fairy-tales in disguise. The characters are not real -men and women, but only make-believe ones; and they are really just -as impossible as if they were called ogres, gnomes, elves, magicians, -or something of that kind.</p> - -<p>It was a relief to me to arrive at this conclusion, and realise that -there was no likelihood of my following in the steps of the -afore-mentioned fictitious damsels, for, however attractive their -experiences might be to read about, I had had very considerable -misgivings as to whether I should find them equally pleasant to -undergo in my own person. I may add that I am sure my incapacity -for imitating them was a most fortunate circumstance for my father; -he would, I am convinced, have been at his wits ends to know what -to do with a daughter of the story-book stamp, and would have been -unutterably taken aback and annoyed at any hysterical demonstrations -of devotion or attachment on my part.</p> - -<h2 id="c2">CHAPTER II.<br /> - -<small>FOREIGN TRAVEL.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">It is time to say a few words as to what my father was like. -Intensely selfish, and hating trouble, he was also extremely -sociable, jovially disposed, easily amused, and endowed with an -enviable facility for shaking off whatever was disagreeable. He -seemed to consider everything unpleasant, dull, sad, or gloomy, as -a sort of poisonous external application which must be got rid of -promptly, lest it should get absorbed into the system. Consequently -he never allowed anything to make a deeper impression on him than -he could help. And in order to escape at once from the depressing -influences of his wife's death he resolved to go abroad immediately -after the funeral, and stay away for a good long time, wandering from -place to place where his fancy took him, so as to distract his mind -from all possibility of melancholy by a complete change of scene and -life.</p> - -<p>As he did not see the use of keeping up an establishment in England -during his absence, he determined to let Castle Manor. Then came the -question of what was to be done with me under these circumstances? -His relations assured him that the best plan would be to send me to -school somewhere till he should again be settled in his own home. -After reflecting for a day on this suggestion, he considerably -astonished those who had made it by announcing that he meant to take -me abroad with him. Such a determination was certainly surprising on -the part of one who could not endure trouble, and had no affection -for me. But the fact was that since his marriage he had got so much -accustomed to the feeling that there was some one belonging to him -always within reach, that he did not now like to live quite alone -again; and therefore he thought he might as well have me handy as a -last resource to fall back upon for company when none other should be -attainable. Wherever he went, therefore, there I went also; and for -that reason we were supposed by many people to be wholly wrapped up -in one another, and a touching example of parental and filial -attachment. I accidentally overheard some remarks to that effect made -one day by a couple of compatriots staying at the same hotel as -ourselves at Naples; and, child as I was, I remember that I laughed -cynically to think how wide of the truth they were, and what fools -people were to be so ready to judge from appearances. For though he -chose to have me living under the same roof as himself, yet he never -had any wish for my society if he could pick up any one else to talk -to, and walk, ride, drive, or make expeditions with; and as his -sociability and geniality made it easy to him to make acquaintance -and fraternise with strangers, he was not often dependent upon me -for companionship; so that I was left very much to myself, and -spent the greater part of the time in solitude, or with my attendant -who was a sort of cross between nursery-governess and maid.</p> - -<p>We moved about from place to place for two or three years, rarely -staying long anywhere, and not once returning to England. This roving -existence had a great charm for me, notwithstanding its frequent -loneliness, and was infinitely more to my taste than would have been -the orthodox schoolroom routine that falls to the lot of most girls -between the ages of twelve and fifteen. Doubtless, too, it had a -good deal of influence on the formation of my character; for the -perpetual motion and change of scene in which I delighted could -hardly fail to foster my inborn restlessness and love of adventure, -as well as to develop whatever natural tendencies I possessed towards -self-reliance, independence, and intolerance of restraint.</p> - -<p>Meanwhile my education, as may be supposed, pursued a somewhat -erratic course, and my standard of attainments would, I fear, have -by no means been considered satisfactory by Mrs. Grundy. A life -passed in hotels, <i class="loanword">pensions</i>, and lodgings is unfavourable to regular -studies; and, besides that, there was no one, after my mother's -death, who cared sufficiently about my intellectual or moral progress -to take the trouble of insisting on lessons being persevered with, -whether I liked them or not. Consequently I learnt anything that took -my fancy, and left alone everything else. On some out-of-the-way -subjects I was better informed than the majority of my contemporaries; -but then, on the other hand, I was ignorant of much that every -schoolgirl is expected to know. My ideas, for instance, as to -religious matters were extremely vague. I was but slightly acquainted -with the contents of either the Bible or Prayer Book; never thought -of religion as a thing with which I, personally, had to do; had not -a notion of what constituted the differences between one form of -religious belief and another; and never attended any place of worship -except when some grand function was to come off. All I cared for in -such a place was to listen to the music, and stare at the lights, -vestments, decorations, ceremonial, and crowd; therefore I only went -on great festivals, or when some especially prized relic was to be -exhibited, or other unusual attraction offered; and, of course, I -became more familiar with the interior of Roman Catholic churches -and chapels than any other.</p> - -<p>What accomplishments I possessed were such as would have qualified -me well enough for a courier, and I think that I could have earned -my livelihood in that line of business without much difficulty after -I had been abroad for a while. I could speak several languages -fluently, besides having a smattering of a few more, and of two or -three <i class="loanword">patois</i>; I was well up in the relative values of foreign -coins, and capable of making a bargain even with such slippery -individuals as drivers, jobmasters, <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">laquais-de-place</i>, or boatmen. -Besides that, I was so thoroughly at home in railway stations that I -could find my way about in any hitherto-unvisited one almost by -instinct; I could usually tell, to within a few minutes, the exact -time when any <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">rapide</i> or <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">grande-vitesse</i> was due to start from -Paris for Spain, Germany, Italy, or the Mediterranean; when it ought -to reach its destination; and at about what hour it would be at the -more important towns on its route; and I had quite mastered the -intricacies of the <cite>English and Foreign Bradshaw</cite>, <cite lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Livret-Chaix</cite>, -and works of a similarly perplexing kind, so as to be able to -discover easily whatever information they could afford. My expertness -in this way was chiefly owing to a happy thought that came into my -head at Bayonne one day when I happened to be left alone for the -afternoon with nothing to do, and no book whatever available except -a railway guide. The prospect till night was not an exhilarating one, -and I was disconsolately wondering how to get through the time, when -it suddenly occurred to me that I would play at being about to start -for St. Petersburg, or some other remote place, and obliged to look -out the best and fastest way of getting there. I set to work -accordingly with the railway guide, and became so engrossed in the -game I had invented that I forgot all about the passage of time, and -was quite astonished to find how quickly the afternoon slipped away -whilst I was settling various journeys to my satisfaction. Such an -easily-attainable means of amusement was a glorious discovery to me, -and one which I commend to the notice of other travellers as a -resource for wet weather and dull moments. Henceforth I had no dread -of lacking amusement, provided I had a time-table; and many a long -hour have I beguiled in planning skeleton tours to all kinds of -places—poring over the times of arrival and departure of trains, -diligences, steamers, and other public conveyances, and weighing in -my own mind the prices and comparative merits of various routes with -every bit as much care and attention as though the imaginary journey -under consideration were a reality, and I were the sole person -responsible to make arrangements for it. This employment had for me -something of the same sort of fascination that working out a problem -in algebra has for some people—indeed I do not think the two things -are greatly unlike each other in their natures.</p> - -<p>Besides the accomplishments I have mentioned, I had also some ideas -as to foreign cookery, which I picked up here and there on our -travels—chiefly on the rare occasions when we were in lodgings -anywhere. I do not think I ever met any mistress of a lodging-house -abroad who did not pride herself particularly upon her cooking of -some one dish (sometimes more than that, but at least one), and who -was not willing to initiate into its mysteries any lodger who evinced -a proper appreciation of its excellence. There was an old woman at -Genoa, I remember, at whose house we stayed for some weeks, who knew -several delicious ways of dressing macaroni and vegetables, and who -not only allowed me to watch her whilst she cooked, and gave me her -favourite recipes, but even stretched her good nature so far as to -let me try my own hand in the kitchen till I could join practice to -theory, and produce a tolerably successful result for my labours. She -was a kindly, motherly old soul, who was impressed with the notion -that there was something peculiarly forlorn and provocative of pity -in my condition; she generally called me <i lang="it" xml:lang="it">poverina</i> (to my amusement), -and took me under her protection from an early stage of our -acquaintance.</p> - -<p>"See, <i lang="it" xml:lang="it">Signorina</i>," she said to me on the second morning of our -occupying her apartments, "you will no doubt wish to buy velvet -here—as all the English do—and many other things also. But be -guided by me, and go not to buy alone, or you will most certainly be -cheated. No! when you see the thing that you desire, come to me—take -me to where it is—point it out to me quietly. Then will I go forward -as though to buy it for myself, and so shall you procure it at a -reasonable price. You who understand not the modes of our merchants, -would pay nearly, or perhaps even altogether—for there is no saying -how far the folly of an English person may go!—the amount that they -demand for their goods. But as for me!—ah! <em>I</em> know how to arrange -these people, and you shall see what I will do! I dare to flatter -myself that there is not a man or woman in the whole of Genoa who -can get the better of me in a bargain!"</p> - -<p>Experience soon showed me that this was no idle vaunt. Though—to her -great disappointment—I declined to buy any velvet, yet I gladly -availed myself of her services for other purchases, and never in my -life, either before or since, have I met with any one who was her match -in bargaining. She never bought anything at a shop or stall without -having taken a final farewell and departed from it at least twice, -and then suffered herself to be brought back by the persuasions of -the owner; I think she regarded this going away and returning as -quite a necessary part of the negotiation, without which it could not -possibly come to a proper conclusion. At all events her efforts were -invariably successful, and she forced shopkeepers, market-people, -and sellers of every sort with whom she had dealings, to accept -reductions of price which seemed to me almost incredible. Meanwhile -I, in whose behalf she was exerting herself, used merely to assist -as a passive spectator, feeling that my knowledge of mankind was -being enlarged, and that I was gaining a valuable insight into the -amount of dishonesty and cunning that was latent in human beings in -general, and Italians in particular. This was especially my feeling -when, as more than once happened, I perceived that my friend herself -was not altogether exempt from the failings of her country-people; -and that, relying on my knowledge of Italian being less than it -really was, she was making a little profit at my expense out of the -transaction she was conducting for me. This was a fresh revelation -of the depravity of human nature, and impressed upon my youthful mind -the folly of trusting absolutely to any professions of friendship, -however genuine they might appear. But, after all, it was not to be -expected that she would take a great deal of trouble for a stranger -gratuitously and out of pure love; besides that, she allowed no one -except herself to cheat me, so that in the end my pocket was saved, -notwithstanding the commissions that she managed adroitly to retain -for her own benefit; and as, furthermore, I derived much instruction -from her in the art of bargaining, I saw that on the whole I was a -gainer by her help, and had nothing to complain of. So I let her act -for me as before, chuckling inwardly at her vehement denunciations -of the roguery that surrounded us, and not telling her of what I had -discovered regarding her own.</p> - -<p>I remember but little of most of the innumerable people with whom my -father was continually making acquaintance; they seemed to me to come -and go in endless succession, having to do with us only for a few -days or hours, and then vanishing into space, with about as much -likelihood of our ever seeing them again as though we had all been so -many dead leaves whirled away by gales from opposite directions. But -there was one of these stray acquaintances who made more impression -on me than the rest, and whom I mention here because of the relations -which she and I were destined to have together in the future—little -as we then suspected it.</p> - -<p>Kitty Mervyn, the individual in question, was a girl of about a year -older than myself, clever, vivacious, and agreeable, and promising to -be very good-looking by the time she should be seventeen. She and I -were cousins in some far-off degree, because her father, Lord Mervyn, -was a cousin many times removed of my grandfather, Lord Gilbert. The -cousinship, however, was so remote that we did not know of each -other's existence; and my father and the Mervyns had never happened -to meet until they arrived one evening at the hotel at which we -were staying at Lugano. Then the distant connection served as an -introduction between us; and as the next day was a dreary wet Sunday, -the feeling of ennui and desire to kill time that was common to us -all, led to our seeing more of one another than we should probably -have done otherwise. Kitty and I paired off together naturally, as -being nearly of the same age. As far as I can recollect, we spent -most of the day in watching and laughing at the performances of -some embryo bicyclists, who were too enthusiastic to be deterred -by either rain or frequent tumbles, and who went on grinding -perseveringly on their bicycles up and down a bit of road in sight -of our windows which was their practice-ground. We did not find it -very lively, certainly; but then there was nothing else to do, unless -we had struck up a romantic friendship and exchanged sentimental -confidences—as some girls thus situated would have done—and -neither she nor I were at all disposed for that sort of thing. Our -intercourse lasted only for that one day, as next morning the Mervyns -departed south, whilst we went to Como. But in the short time I had -been with Kitty she had somehow made a stronger impression than usual -on my unimpressionable mind, and the recollection of her lingered in -my memory longer than that of any one else whom we met. Her good -looks attracted me; her cleverness and liveliness made her very good -company. Notwithstanding an incipient haughtiness about her, which -might develop as she grew older, perhaps, she seemed at present -to have a decided capacity for being what I called jolly; and, -altogether, she had given me the idea of being remarkably likeable. I -was sorry that the chances of travel made us separate so soon, and -wondered if she was at all inclined to return the liking which I had -taken to her. But she passed out of my head after a while; and it was -only now and then that I recollected her existence, and thought how -pleasant it would be if we happened to meet again some day.</p> - -<h2 id="c3">CHAPTER III.<br /> - -<small>A WIDOW'S MANŒUVRES.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">The life of travelling companion to my father being very much to my -taste, I was naturally disgusted at its coming to a conclusion. This -happened when I was about fifteen, and was caused by an event to -which I objected strongly, and which was destined to have a most -important effect on my subsequent existence.</p> - -<p>We were making a tour through Holland and Friesland, and, when at -Amsterdam, happened to make acquaintance with a Mrs. Grove, a widow, -accompanied by two daughters, who were respectively two and three -years older than me. I did not take to her at all, and thought she -seemed a flattering, lying, pushing, cringing, vulgar individual; but -having carelessly thought that much of her, I dismissed her from my -mind as a person with whom I had nothing to do, and whose character -was quite immaterial to me—little thinking what a <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">bête noire</i> -she was to prove to me afterwards!</p> - -<p>She was on the look-out for a -successor for the deceased Mr. Grove; and as my father appeared to -her to be a very suitable person for the vacancy, she began at once -to lay siege to his affections. She did not, however, wish to show -her hand too plainly at first, by attaching herself to us so openly -as to make it obvious that she meant to pursue us from place to -place. Therefore, the plan she adopted was, to discover, by -apparently careless questioning, whither Sir Anthony's wayward fancy -was likely to take him next; having done this, she would direct her -own course to the same district, go to some principal town in it -which we should be pretty sure to visit sooner or later, wait for us -there, and then pretend to be greatly surprised when we arrived, and -to consider the meeting a purely accidental one. For instance, my -father intended to go from Friesland to Münster, which he considered -would be good headquarters whence to go to the neighbouring town -of Soest, where he wanted to see the <i lang="de" xml:lang="de">Wiesen Kirche</i>, and other -specimens of Gothic architecture. He had spoken of this in Mrs. -Grove's presence, so that she was quite aware of his intentions in -the matter. Consequently there occurred what she called a curious -coincidence, as she also was moved by the self-same thirst for -archaeological studies at that particular time; and thus when we -reached Münster from Winschoten, we found her already installed in -the former city before us. At Cassel and at Frankfort did we again -fall in with her; and on the very first night of our being at -Heidelberg she and her daughters joined us under the walls of the old -castle, as we sauntered about in the dark and admired the brilliant -fireflies.</p> - -<p>Sir Anthony was too much a man of the world to ascribe these -perpetually recurring meetings entirely to chance, and soon began to -have a shrewd suspicion of the widow's intentions. Then he took to -amusing himself with her, withholding information as to his movements -when she cross-questioned him about them, putting her on a wrong -scent, and otherwise baffling her curiosity. Once or twice he joked -about the matter with me (towards whom she affected extreme -friendliness), and asked me whether I thought she wanted him as a -match for herself or for one of the daughters? This behaviour of his -calmed the state of perturbation into which I had been previously -thrown; for I was most indignant at the notion of her wanting to -marry him, and was in a terrible fright lest she should succeed. For -one thing the mere idea of a stepmother was repugnant to me—be she -who she might; and besides that, I had not the slightest confidence -in the sincerity of Mrs. Grove's demonstrations of affection for me, -which were, I felt sure, only assumed in order to ingratiate herself -with my father; for I saw that she—like every one else—was misled -by appearances, and took it for granted that a man who insisted on -taking his daughter with him wherever he went, must be so devoted to -her as to be certain to entertain kindly feelings towards any one who -should appear fond of her. But my anxiety was relieved when I found -that he was by no means blind to her designs, and was quite ready to -laugh at them openly, and to take a mischievous pleasure in teasing -her. That reassured me, and made me feel satisfied that her labours -were in vain, and that I had nothing to apprehend from them.</p> - -<p>This easy tranquillisation of my fears just showed my youth and -inexperience. Had I been somewhat older I should have known what -irresistible power over men almost all widows possess—which is the -natural result of the insight into man's nature that they have -acquired already, during their first matrimonial experiences. Mrs. -Grove was no exception to the rule, and was as dangerous a widow as -need be—having a thorough knowledge of the weaknesses of the male -character and of the way to humour them, and understanding perfectly -how to make herself agreeable to any lord of creation whom fortune -might throw in her way.</p> - -<p>It was no part of her tactics to leave Sir Anthony long in doubt that -it was for herself, and not for either of her daughters, that she -desired to captivate his affections. She was certainly vulgar; but -as, also, she was a comely, well-preserved woman of little more than -forty, who looked rather less than her age, it tickled his vanity -pleasantly to find himself attractive to her; and notwithstanding -his having ridiculed her for setting her cap at him, he did not, -nevertheless, altogether dislike it in the bottom of his heart. It -was true that he had not previously contemplated marrying again; -but then that was only because he had not yet met any particular -person to suggest the thought to him since my mother's death; and -he had been sufficiently occupied and amused with his travels for -the notion not to have occurred to him of itself. Now, however, -that the idea was thus put into his head, he began to reflect upon -the matter seriously; the more he considered it—being all the while -insensibly influenced in its favour by the flattering attentions and -blandishments of the widow—the more favourably did he regard it, -and presently came to the conclusion that a wife was really almost -indispensable to his comfort. He could forgive a little vulgarity -provided she had money to gild it; and, feeling that Mrs. Grove's -pecuniary circumstances had become suddenly interesting to him, he -began putting out feelers on the subject when talking to her. He -imagined himself to be going to work most diplomatically, and to have -artfully concealed the true motive of his questions and remarks; but -the widow was more than a match for him. She at once detected his -curiosity, and guessed the reason for it; and managed cleverly to -impress him with the idea that her jointure and settlements were -considerably larger than was the actual case. Whether or not she -would have accomplished her purpose without this stratagem, it is -impossible to say; but, at any rate, it did what she intended it to -do, and brought matters to a climax. The belief that a rich wife was -to be had, and that it would be foolish of him to miss such an -opportunity, put an end to his irresolution. He proposed, and was -accepted; and within two months from the time that they were -introduced to each other at Amsterdam, she succeeded in attaining -what she desired, and became Lady Trecastle.</p> - -<p>Her ladyship, being a thorough John Bull at heart, had no great -fondness for foreign places and people. She had come to the continent -because she believed it to be a likely hunting-ground whereon to find -a husband; and as soon as she had secured her prey she did not care -about staying abroad any longer. Another thing that made her wish to -return to her native land was, that she was extremely proud of the -newly-acquired handle to her name, and was burning to air it amongst -those who would properly appreciate it; for what country is there in -Europe, Asia, or Africa (about America I say nothing), where a title -produces so much effect, and is so bowed down to and worshipped as in -that abode of snobs—England? Therefore, as soon as she was engaged -to Sir Anthony, she determined to endeavour to make him give up his -nomadic existence, return home, and settle there. By way of paving -the way in this direction she would reproach him, half in jest and -half in earnest, for being an absentee, and having no proper -patriotic spirit; or else she would deliver a harangue upon the -roguery of most agents, and the folly of leaving property to be -managed by them instead of looking after it in person; and with these -and similar observations, she sought to bring him to wish himself -to do the thing that she desired should be done. Finding him -more inclined to listen to her than she had expected, she grew -bolder, and passed from hints to a more direct expression of her -desires. He was evidently not greatly averse to discontinue his -foreign rambles, as I perceived with sorrow. The fact was that he had -only gone abroad because my mother's death gave him gloomy and -disagreeable associations with his house, and on that account he had -taken a temporary dislike to it; but his facility for getting rid of -whatever was unpleasant had made him quite shake off that feeling of -dislike by now. Before long Mrs. Grove had worked upon him so -far that he began even to feel eager to return home, and to look -forward with pleasurable anticipation to the idea of showing the -place to its new mistress, and introducing her to the society of -the neighbourhood.</p> - -<p>I said what I could to oppose going back to England whenever I had -an opportunity; but alas! what chance had I against the influence of -the widow? Of course she carried her point without difficulty; and, -to my great grief, notice to quit was sent to the tenants of Castle -Manor. It so happened that there were accidental circumstances which -made it convenient to the tenants to leave at once, without waiting -for the expiration of the term of the notice, and thus the house was -vacated at an unexpectedly early date. No sooner was this the case -than Sir Anthony and Lady Trecastle returned home and established -themselves there, accompanied by their joint families, which -consisted of Margaret Grove, aged eighteen; Jane Grove, aged -seventeen; and myself, aged rather more than fifteen.</p> - -<h2 id="c4">CHAPTER IV.<br /> - -<small>A TIGHT CURB.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">When an indolent, easy-going, trouble-hating man, such as my father, -marries an energetic, bustling, authority-loving woman, such as Mrs. -Grove, it is not hard to foresee which of the two will bear rule in -the establishment. A very brief acquaintance with Sir Anthony -sufficed to show the widow that, with a little management on her -part, she would be able to govern the household as she liked; that as -long as he was kept amused he would not bother himself to interfere -with her arrangements; and that all she need do in order to keep the -reins entirely in her own hands, was to take care that her way and -his were identical in whatever affected his personal comfort—she -would then be free to please herself as far as all other things were -concerned. She was not, at first, altogether easy in her mind as to -how he would bear the discovery of what the real state of her money -matters was; which discovery, as she knew, he must inevitably make -soon, and might possibly cause him to be seriously angry with her. -But she need not have feared this with a man of his disposition, who -never worried himself about anything that could not be helped. Though -he was, undoubtedly, much annoyed to find how much poorer she was -than he had supposed, yet he reflected, with his usual philosophy, -that it was no use making a fuss about it, now that he had married -her, and that what could not be altered had better be made the best -of. So he gulped down the disappointment with a wry face or two, and -did not attempt to make her suffer for her deceitfulness as she -deserved.</p> - -<p>As soon as she was satisfied on this head, and felt that she was -established in her seat securely, she turned her attention to me—who -would infinitely have preferred being let alone. I had never trusted -to the sincerity of the professions of affection she had lavished on -me in the early stages of our acquaintance, when she had imagined me -to be my father's especial pet; and it speedily became evident that -this distrust of mine had been well founded. She thought it quite -worth while taking trouble to keep the master of the house in good -humour, and would study and humour his likes and dislikes in the most -amiable manner possible. But she saw no reason for extending the same -consideration to a mere insignificant nobody; and when she had -discovered how little he cared for me, and that she might do as she -pleased regarding me and my affairs without danger of interference -from him, she proceeded to take my education in hand, and conduct it -according to her own notions. As her ideas on the subject and mine -were entirely different, and as the more she and I saw of one another -the more we disliked each other, the result of this meddling of hers -was fatal to my comfort. And the two or three years following my -father's second marriage were so horribly dull and tedious to me that -I cannot recall them without a shudder.</p> - -<p>Everything seemed to go against me from the time of that wedding. In -the first place, I resented having a stepmother, and finding myself -forced suddenly into terms of intimacy with the three strangers (her -and her two daughters) who had all at once become part of my family. -Then came the termination of the foreign wanderings that I had found -so pleasant. And now came the culminating misery of being under the -commands of a selfish, vulgar, lying, bullying, stingy, pretentious, -plausible, tyrannical woman, whom I could not endure, and who fully -returned my dislike.</p> - -<p>I had an unlucky knack of perpetually irritating her, and was always -sure to be in the wrong in her eyes. Either I said or did something -that was contrary to her notions of what I ought to have said or -done; or I scandalised her by displaying grievous ignorance of some -subject which she deemed an essential branch of knowledge; or else I -shocked her prejudices in some other way. She was not the woman to -put up quietly with offences of this kind in her own household, and -proceeded without delay to attempt to remedy my deficiencies. -Accordingly she informed my father that she considered my mental -condition to have been neglected terribly; that I had been allowed to -run wild till I was very nearly ruined; and that she saw no chance of -my ever becoming a properly behaved young lady and decent member of -society unless a governess were procured for me immediately, and I -were kept strictly to the schoolroom until such time as I should -come out. Should she, therefore, engage a governess? My father, -as usual, made no objection to a proposal which would in no way -interfere with his own comfort. All he said was that she could do -just as she thought best about it; that he did not himself see much -to complain of in me, and had thought I was not at all bad company, -considering my youth; but that he had no doubt she understood -better than him what was necessary for girls, and that whatever she -did was sure to be right.</p> - -<p>Armed with this permission, she at once took steps to carry out her -intention, and a few days afterwards announced to me the contemplated -innovation.</p> - -<p>"Your father and I have agreed, Ina," she said, "that it is high -time to make a change in your present mode of life—you need to be -put into harness for a bit and broken in. Therefore, I have engaged -a governess for you, and she will be here next week. What I wish -to impress upon you now is, that when she comes you must do what -she tells you, and that I shall expect you to pass your time with -her. I do not approve of your fondness for sitting in your own -room; nor yet of your habit of appearing continually amongst us -elders when there are visitors here, just as if you were grown up -and already introduced into society! The drawing-room is not the -proper place for a girl of your age. Remember that in future you -are to remain always in the schoolroom when indoors, and that, when -not at lessons, you must employ yourself there in some quiet and -ladylike pursuit—needlework perhaps, or something of that kind. And -when you go out you will walk with your governess, and not go -climbing trees, or digging out rabbits, or racing all over the place -like a wild thing, as you generally do."</p> - -<p>The idea of being thus hampered and restrained filled me with dismay; -and in my despair I appealed to my father, in hopes that he would -protect my cherished liberty of action.</p> - -<p>"Why should I have a governess at all?" I exclaimed to him; "I'm -sure I've got on very well without, for ever so long! But even if -I <em>am</em> to have one, surely I may be free of the hateful thing out of -lesson-time, mayn't I? Just think how <em>horrid</em> it would be to be -obliged to be always with her—sitting in the room with her all day, -and only going for stupid, straight-on-end grinds along the hard high -road with her when I go out! Do say that I'm not to be condemned to -that, at all events!"</p> - -<p>No doubt I was a fool for my pains, and ought to have known better -than to suppose that I could move him to oppose his wife on my -behalf. So the event proved, for he declined to interfere in the -matter, and the only effect produced by my appeal was to strengthen -Lady Trecastle's hands by increasing her conviction of the extreme -unlikelihood of my father's ever paying attention to any complaint -that I might make to him. From that time forth, therefore, she felt -more secure than ever in her authority over me, and her tyranny -increased accordingly. When the governess arrived I was kept immured -in the schoolroom the greater part of each day, and was surrounded by -a variety of petty restraints and restrictions which were enough to -have worried any girl, and were especially vexatious and irksome to -one who had had the unusual amount of independence which I had been -enjoying of recent years. I found myself deprived of freedom; always -under <i class="loanword">surveillance</i>; obliged to learn uninteresting lessons; bored; -and constantly tacked on to the petticoats of an individual whose -office of governess made her necessarily hateful in my eyes, however -charming—even angelic—she might really be. Of course such an -existence was perfectly odious to me, and I do not think that I could -have anyhow managed to endure it as long as I did, if I had not -fortunately hit upon a means whereby I could to some extent relieve -its dreary monotony. This resource consisted in victimising, to the -extent of my power, any rash female who had undertaken to instruct -me, playing off upon her ill-natured pranks of all kinds, and leaving -no stone unturned to make her life a burden to her till I had fairly -driven her out of the house.</p> - -<p>What a dreadful confession of unamiability! some reader may, perhaps, -here exclaim. Well—I do not deny it. Be it remembered that the -purpose of this narrative is, not to set forth an imaginary picture -of virtue and excellence, but simply an accurate likeness of myself; -and I should evidently fail of accomplishing that purpose if I were -to conceal or gloss over those sentiments which I really entertained -and acted upon. But even if my behaviour <em>does</em> lay me open to the -charge of unamiability, I do not think that that need be wondered at, -when the peculiarities of my natural disposition, of my bringing-up, -and of my whole circumstances, are taken into consideration.</p> - -<p>The occupation of bullying and annoying my governesses to the utmost -possible extent had a double recommendation in my eyes. Not only did -it supply an ample field for my ingenuity, and give me something -amusing to think about in the dreary walks and long hours spent in -the schoolroom, but also it afforded me the satisfaction of -retaliation. I had a savage joy in knowing that I was able to pay off -my companion for some of the vexations that she was the means of -inflicting on me; and I relished the thought that even if I <em>did</em> -have a rough time myself, yet at all events I did not suffer alone. -Endless, therefore, were the tricks and practical jokes which I used -to devise and execute for the aggravation of whatever unlucky -individual happened to have taken charge of my education; and so -skilful was I in my operations that it was but seldom any piece of -mischief could be traced home to me, however greatly I might be -suspected of its authorship. I was an adept, too, at the art of -being extremely insulting and provoking without saying anything that -would seem a just cause of irritation if repeated to a third person. -I knew how to speak with an offensiveness of voice and manner which -gave an injurious significance to words that were in themselves -innocent; and by this method I have often succeeded in making a -governess wildly angry, although I had given her nothing tangible -that could be taken hold of and brought against me to substantiate a -charge of rudeness. If she complained that I had been impertinent, I -assumed an air of injured innocence, repeated exactly what I had -said, asked what harm there was in that? and declared that it was -very unfair to blame me because Miss so-and-so had chosen to fly -into a passion about nothing. In fact I was aggravating enough to -have provoked the patient Grizzel herself; and as governesses are -not much apt to be patient Grizzels in their relations to their -pupils (however gentle and long-suffering they may make themselves -appear to the heads of the establishment), our schoolroom was in a -constant state of turmoil and ferment, and there was a remarkable -difficulty in getting governesses to stay at Castle Manor. About a -month or six weeks was generally enough to disgust them with the -situation, and they rarely failed to give notice at the end of that -time. This was an event that always gave me a sensation of unmixed -satisfaction; as, for one thing, I then felt that I had scored a -fresh victory and routed another enemy, and also, I knew that the -arrival of her successor could not fail to bring some small amount -of variety into the monotonous routine of existence of which I was so -deadly tired.</p> - -<p>But this constant change of governesses over which I rejoiced, and -which was chiefly my doing, was by no means equally agreeable to Lady -Trecastle. When an instructress went, it was she who had to procure a -successor, and she did not find it at all amusing to be incessantly -answering advertisements, writing for characters, and that sort of -thing. And as, notwithstanding the difficulty of ever actually -proving a misdemeanour against me, she had strong doubts of my -innocence, therefore she considered me responsible for the bother she -continually had about governesses, and regarded me with increased -disfavour on that account. She had the sense to suspect that there -would not be such endless storms in the schoolroom if the pupil were -not unusually unmanageable and turbulent; and, acting on that -opinion, she made several efforts to induce me to be more tractable, -in order that thereby she might be saved the trouble that my conduct -entailed upon her.</p> - -<p>At one time she tried the effect of addressing serious rebukes and -admonitions to me; but I cared not one straw for them. Then she -increased the strictness of my confinement, and ordained that every -disturbance should always be followed by the loss of the next -half-holiday or other pleasure of which I might have a chance; but -still I remained unsubdued. Then a third method of overcoming me -suddenly struck her, and she one day wound up a lengthy scolding by -declaring that her patience was at an end, that she would <em>not</em> stand -the perpetual commotions I caused any longer, and that the very next -time one occurred I should be packed off to some school at once.</p> - -<p>Now it was all very well for her to talk big of sending me to school; -but in point of fact I felt pretty sure that she would do nothing of -the kind, because it was very convenient to her to have a governess -in the house on account of her own two daughters, for whom she did -not want to go to the expense of masters, and who often needed -assistance in the various accomplishments she wished them to acquire. -This assistance they were in the habit of receiving from whoever -happened to be in charge of me, though they were too old to be -regularly in the schoolroom, and as my going to school would remove -the ostensible reason for having a governess at Castle Manor, it was -not at all likely that she meant to do what she said.</p> - -<p>But though she knew the threat to be an empty one, that did not at -all hinder her from uttering it. Being at her wits' end for something -to hold over me <i lang="la" xml:lang="la">in terrorem</i>, it suddenly occurred to her that a -girl who had always lived with her own belongings, as I had done, -would probably dread the notion of being sent away alone amongst -strangers, and that therefore the school project stood a very good -chance of awing me into submission.</p> - -<p>Instead of that, however, I evinced such delight at the prospect as -took the wind out of her sails completely. I had not in reality the -slightest objection to school, because it would be a change, and -anything in the shape of a change would be welcome. And of course -my manifestations of delight were all the more exaggerated as I -perceived her annoyance at finding me look forward joyfully to the -thing she hoped I should have feared. Thus she was thoroughly -discomfited; and never again did I hear her say I was to go to -school, though I several times returned to the subject of myself, -asking to know when I was going, saying I hoped it would be soon, -etc. etc. I must say that I greatly enjoyed having triumphed over -her so completely; and I reflected with malicious pleasure on the -vexation and humiliation it must be to her to know that I had -detected the emptiness of her threat, and could henceforth look -down upon her with all the contempt which an utterer of such threats -is sure to inspire.</p> - -<p>But though I did what I could to procure a little change and -excitement by making myself disagreeable, and plaguing my stepmother -and teachers, yet the tedium of my life was so great as to be almost -unendurable; and again and again did I consider the expediency of -putting an end to it by running away from home, and trusting to my -own resources for getting a livelihood. I used to meditate seriously -on how the thing was to be done, arranging every detail, foreseeing -and meeting probable obstacles, providing for possible contingencies, -and working the whole scheme out from beginning to end in my own -mind. It seemed to me quite feasible; and as I was not a bit afraid -of failure, or of what might happen to me when cast upon the world by -myself, I should certainly have put my idea into practice if there -had not been one consideration which deterred me and kept me where I -was. This was the thought that I was very nearly seventeen. At that -age I was convinced that girls invariably came out, and therefore -took it for granted that I should do so also. And as the yoke under -which I groaned would be broken before long in the natural course of -events, it seemed better to resign myself for the short space during -which I should still be subject to it, rather than to anticipate the -day of emancipation by so desperate a measure as running away from -home.</p> - -<p>But in my calculations as to the time of my being brought out, I -had quite omitted one most important factor, viz. what might be my -stepmother's wishes in regard to that matter. These, as it happened, -were diametrically opposed to mine. She had no fancy to go about with -three young ladies in tow, nor did she feel inclined to risk spoiling -the matrimonial chances of Margaret or Jane by leaving either of them -at home, and taking me out with her instead. Therefore she intended -to keep me back in a state of pupilage as long as possible, and to -endeavour to get one or both of her own daughters married out of the -way before I should make my appearance in society. In consequence of -this private scheme of hers, the attainment of the age of seventeen, -from which I had hoped such great things, produced no amelioration in -my condition. I was astonished and disgusted to find that the days -and weeks dragged heavily on at lessons as before, and brought no -indications of the approach of that liberty to which I had looked -forward confidently. Of course, I was not going to stand this without -complaining, so I remonstrated with Lady Trecastle, declaring that -I was being treated very unfairly, that every girl came out at -seventeen, and that I ought now to be let to share equally with my -step-sisters in whatever invitations for balls, dinners, or other -gaieties might arrive at Castle Manor. My complaints were unheeded, -however, and my grievance remained unredressed. I was not fit to go -into society, she said; I was so untrained, stupid, disagreeable, and -bad-tempered, that she would be ashamed to take me out, and I must -positively remain in the schoolroom till my manners and temper should -be improved. Chafing and fretting under repeated disappointments, I -managed to get through another dreary year of monotony, but when my -eighteenth birthday arrived and found me still a prisoner in the -schoolroom, I resolved not to stand this treatment any longer. It -became evident to me that her ladyship destined me to play the part -of Cinderella. As I had no fancy for that <i class="loanword">rôle</i>, and as I had not a -fairy godmother to come to my assistance, I must take the matter -into my own hands and act fairy godmother for myself. Therefore I -determined to execute the plan which I had already reflected upon -so often, and to run away from home and take my chance of what might -afterwards befall me.</p> - -<h2 id="c5">CHAPTER V.<br /> - -<small>BREAKING LOOSE.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">Had running away from home been a brand new idea that had never -before occurred to me, I daresay I should have had to postpone -carrying it out till I had had time to mature the design and -consider how it was to be accomplished. As it was, however, there -was no need for delay on that account, for I had pondered on the -subject often enough to be thoroughly familiar with it, and to have -discovered a variety of methods for executing the project. In all -these schemes there was one point which I had always kept steadily in -view, and that was the importance of so arranging my flight as to -secure myself a long start before my absence should be discovered. I -had but little fear of managing to evade pursuit, if only I could -get a good way ahead of it at first. I saw that the best means of -ensuring this would be to have the coast clear of authorities when I -took myself off. Therefore I determined to put off my departure for -a few days longer, in order to avail myself of a particularly -favourable opportunity which would then occur, as my father, -step-mother, and two step-sisters would be going to stay away for a -ball and other gaieties at a friend's house. When once they were out -of the way, there would be no one to interfere with me except my -governess, Miss Smith, and I thought it would be odd indeed if I -could not manage to get rid of her also somehow or other. Several -expedients whereby this might be effected soon suggested themselves -to me, and after a little consideration I made up my mind to try to -impose upon her with a sham telegram. She was a somewhat colourless -individual, much given to writing letters and reading novels, -nervous, easily fussed, sentimental, and possessing a sister named -Alice who kept a school at Carlisle, and to whom it was evident that -she was very much attached. Now I felt certain that if she believed -this beloved sister to be in need of her, nothing would induce her to -stay away, and that a telegraphic summons from Miss Alice Smith would -cause my Miss Smith to rush off to Carlisle as fast as trains would -take her there. Such a summons, therefore, I must contrive that she -should receive. The only difficulty about forging the telegram I -required for my purpose was that I had not the proper paper or -envelope; the latter I might possibly contrive to do without, if -necessary, but the former was absolutely indispensable, and if I -could not get hold of a piece of it, I should have to relinquish the -telegram scheme altogether and substitute some other.</p> - -<p>In order to procure what I wanted I pretended to be in need -of stamps, and upon that pretext went to the post-office at -Greenlea, as our village was called. The post-office was also a -telegraph-office and sort of general emporium, and was kept by an old -man named Jones, who had been there for years, and was certain not to -dream it possible that one of the ladies from Castle Manor should -have nefarious designs upon any of the stores over which he presided. -Having bought my stamps, and made one or two friendly remarks to the -proprietor, I affected a sudden interest in the working of the -telegraph, and was, as I expected, promptly invited behind the -counter to inspect the machine more closely. The blank forms and -envelopes requisite for sending out messages were lying close by -amongst some other papers, and somehow I was awkward enough to upset -the whole lot of papers together on the ground. "Oh how very stupid -of me!" I exclaimed, penitently, kneeling down as I spoke, and -beginning to collect the scattered papers; "I'll pick them up again -in a moment, Jones; don't you trouble!" What with old age and -rheumatism, Jones' joints were somewhat stiff, and he was not sorry -to be saved from the necessity of stooping down in the rather -confined space behind the counter.</p> - -<p>"Well, indeed, 'tis a shame for you to be doing that, Miss, and me -looking on idle," he replied; "but I'm much obliged to you, too, and -I won't say no to a good offer. We old folks ben't quite so flippant -to move ourselves up and down as you young 'uns be; and it be a bit -narrer in here atween the wall and the counter, you see." So he -complacently received the papers from me and restored them to their -places as I handed them up in instalments; and he never missed the -telegraph form and envelope which I slipped swiftly into my pocket -whilst his eyes were turned in another direction. I left his shop in -triumph, having thus supplied myself with the means to which I -trusted for removing Miss Smith off the premises; and I was now all -ready to commence operations as soon as my stepmother and her husband -and daughters should take themselves off upon their intended visit.</p> - -<p>The eventful day arrived, and I stood looking at them drive away from -the house with a curious mixture of feelings—partly gloomy and -partly cheerful. There went these people who constituted my family, -and I meant never to set eyes on them again if I could help it. They -were going to lark about, dance, be jolly, and amuse themselves in -all kinds of ways, and it was a horrid shame that I was not going -too. I should have been, only that Lady Trecastle would not let me -have fair play, and had chosen to spite me and to treat me like -a child when I was not one. I considered that she had behaved -infamously to me. Other young people of my age and position could go -to balls, enjoy themselves, have lots of fun, and frolic to their -heart's content, and it was grossly unjust to debar me from doing the -same. I was an oppressed and harshly-treated victim. I was being -defrauded of my rights and ousted from my proper place through the -enmity of a malevolent step-mother and the negligence of a father, -who was too selfish and indolent to care what became of me, or any -one else, as long as he was himself happy.</p> - -<p>As I stood at the window watching the departing carriage, and -meditating on the wrongs that had rankled long in my breast, and had -now at last reached their culminating point, I felt a single burning -tear gather slowly in each eye and brim over on the cheek beneath. -Weeping is not a weakness to which I am given, for I am, as a rule, -one of the least tearful of mortals. But that tear was an exceptional -one, and was drawn from me solely by a feeling of bitter resentment -for past injuries, not by any foolish regrets or sentimentality -relating to my approaching separation from both home and family.</p> - -<p>Mingled with these disagreeable thoughts, however, there was also -present in my mind an exhilarating idea, which soon dispelled the -unpleasant ones even as the sun disperses cloud. How could I mind -anything now that liberty was so close at hand? What did it matter -that Lady Trecastle had been able to convert my home into a hateful -prison, now that I was about to break my bonds and cut myself adrift -from it? Those people whose departure I had just watched should find -a little surprise awaiting them on their return, in the shape of my -disappearance! Freedom, novelty, and adventures lay before me. -Without these things life was not worth having, and I was on the -brink of enjoying them. Hurrah! The wide world was going to be open -to me, and I was about to enter on an unknown future, wherein -everything would be different from the past. The thought of all -this made my pulses throb with excitement, and filled me with wild -eagerness for the first taste of the anticipated joys.</p> - -<p>I did not mean to deliver the forged telegram to Miss Smith till it -should be nearly time for the train, by which I expected that she -would go to Carlisle, to leave Sparkton—that being the name of our -nearest town. As that train did not start till past four o'clock -in the afternoon, and as Sir Anthony and Lady Trecastle and her -daughters had left home in the morning, I had to control my -impatience for some hours longer. Part of this time I employed in -preparing the telegram. Upon the blank form I scrawled in a feigned -hand as follows—"Alice Smith, Carlisle, to Miss Smith, Castle Manor, -Greenlea, Sparkton. <em>Come without losing a moment. I need your help -immediately</em>." Having enclosed this in the proper envelope of thin -yellow paper, and directed it to Miss Smith, I did not neglect also -to fill in the blank spaces on the outside with the requisite -information as to the time when the message was sent out, when handed -in, etc. I knew that she would probably be far too much perturbed by -the telegram to notice any little irregularity about its appearance, -but, for all that, I meant to be on the safe side, and to have -everything in order, so that there might be no possible ground -for suspicion.</p> - -<p>When the due time had arrived for me to spring the mine that I had -prepared for her I betook myself to the schoolroom, where she was -engaged as usual in inditing epistles to some of her numerous -correspondents.The precious telegram was in my hand, and I proceeded -to deliver it to her, and also to account for the unusual circumstance -of its being brought by me instead of by a servant, according to the -ordinary course of things.</p> - -<p>"Here's something for you," I said; "I went out to pick some flowers -just now, and as I was coming back towards the house I overtook a -child from Greenlea with this in its hand. Of course I saw at a -glance that it was a telegram—one can't mistake the appearance of -the article—and I asked which of the household it was for. It's for -you; and as I was coming straight in then I thought I would bring it -myself, and save the child having to come any farther."</p> - -<p>The mere sight of the telegram sufficed to flutter Miss Smith's -nerves, and her fingers shook visibly as she opened it. The instant -she had perused its contents she jumped up in a tremendous state of -agitation, and exclaimed: "Good gracious! it's from my sister Alice! -She wants me immediately, but doesn't say what's the matter. What -<em>can</em> have happened? Perhaps she's ill! I must go to her at once. -What trains are there? Isn't there a <cite>Bradshaw</cite> somewhere? <em>That's</em> -not it, nor <em>that</em>, nor <em>that!"</em></p> - -<p>As she spoke she hurriedly took up one after another of the books -lying near, and examined their titles to see if either of them was a -<cite>Bradshaw</cite>, although there was nothing in the room that bore any -resemblance whatever to the well-known work. But she was a great deal -too much upset to notice that. I, however, needed no <cite>Bradshaw</cite> to -enable me to give her the information she wanted, as I had already -ascertained exactly the starting-time of the next train that would -suit her, and had it at the tip of my tongue.</p> - -<p>"The last train to the North from Sparkton starts at 4.20 in the -afternoon, I know," I answered; "that's the one for you to go by, and -if you go at once you'll just have time to catch it. Better go and -get ready as fast as you can, and I'll order the carriage to take you -to the station."</p> - -<p>"Yes, yes, that'll be the way; thank you so much," she returned, -beginning to hasten towards the door. Before she had quite reached it -a sudden thought struck her, and she turned round with a look of -consternation, exclaiming, "Oh dear! I quite forgot that you'll be -all alone! I'm afraid Lady Trecastle won't like it. How unlucky for -her just to have gone away! But really what <em>can</em> I do? Read the -telegram yourself, Ina; you'll see it's absolutely <em>imperative</em> I -should go at once. My poor, dear Alice! I'm sure something quite -<em>dreadful</em> must have happened to make her send for me like this. It -can't be any <em>trifle</em>, I know, for she is one of the calmest, least -excitable mortals on the face of the earth!"</p> - -<p>She's not much like you, then, was my inward reflection, as I looked -at the spectacle of pitiable nervousness presented by my governess, -with her fingers twitching aimlessly to and fro, and her face -expressing feeble and helpless apprehension of evil. Indeed, I was -not altogether free from a feeling of compunction for being the means -of throwing her into such a state of distress, which must continue, -as I knew, till she should reach Carlisle, and discover that the -telegram had been a sham. But then she had to be got out of the way -somehow or other, and it would never do for a young woman who meant -to make her own way in the world, as I did, to be squeamish about -inflicting pain on other people if necessary; and after all it was -partly her own fault for having become the governess of a person who -did not want one at all. Besides that, the more miserable she was -now, the greater would be her joy and relief when she should learn -that her fears were unfounded. Really the bliss of that moment would -be so exquisite that I quite looked forward to it on her account!</p> - -<p>When she handed me the telegram I of course affected to have no -previous knowledge of its contents, and even made believe to have a -difficulty in making out one or two of the words. Having read it -through, I said, "Oh certainly, you're bound to go at once, there -can't be a doubt of that. Don't bother yourself about Lady Trecastle; -I'll tell her exactly how the matter was. You know she and my father -will be back in a couple of days, and I shall be all right till their -return. But you'll lose your train if you don't look sharp now."</p> - -<p>Reassured by this speech, she hurried off to get ready, whilst I rang -the bell to order the carriage. It was an object to me to have her -out of the room when I did this, as her absence enabled me at the -same time that I ordered the carriage to send word to the cook that -no dinner would be wanted that night. Miss Smith, I said, had been -called away suddenly, and I meant to travel with her a short -distance, to the house of one of my aunts, with whom I should stay -until Sir Anthony and Lady Trecastle returned. There was nothing -unlikely about my paying a visit to my aunt when left alone -unexpectedly; and I made this announcement to prevent the servants -from becoming alarmed at my disappearance, and bringing about a -premature discovery of my flight by communicating at once with my -father.</p> - -<p>I next went to Miss Smith to tell her that I was coming with her as -far as the station to see her off; I said that I knew my father -wanted to have some things mended at a shop in Sparkton, and that I -thought I might as well avail myself of this opportunity of taking -them to the town, now that the carriage was going there with her. Of -course the discrepancy between this statement and the one which I had -just made for the benefit of the household would become apparent, and -put me into an awkward position, if she and the servants should -happen to compare notes as to what I had been saying. But I felt I -could reckon confidently that no such comparison would take place; -as, for one thing, my governess was a deal too much flurried and -taken up with her own affairs to think of anything else; and, for -another thing, my precaution of not delivering the telegram till -there was only just time to catch the train, prevented her from -having time for idle conversation, even if she <em>had</em> happened to -feel disposed for such a thing.</p> - -<p>I had had considerable difficulty in making up my mind what to do -about luggage. If I did not take any, that would look odd to the -servants, who believed me to be going to stay with my aunt; but then -Miss Smith, on the other hand, who fancied that I was merely going to -drive into Sparkton to see her off, would be astonished at any -appearance of boxes, bags, or portmanteaux that indicated an intended -absence from home. Besides that, it would not suit my plan of action -to be encumbered with anything that I could not manage easily to -carry through the streets with my own hands.</p> - -<p>I had considered this knotty point for some time before I could -determine how to settle it. What I finally resolved upon was to take -a small hand-bag which was just large enough to hold sufficient -wearing apparel for a two night's visit (so as to impose upon the -servants), and which was yet not too large for me to be able to carry -about easily. Then, if my governess should make any remarks about -its presence in the carriage, and wonder what I wanted it for, I -could tell her that it contained the things for my father that were -going to be mended. Into this hand-bag I had already packed all the -jewellery I possessed, and as many clothes and other articles likely -to come useful as there was room for. Thus all my preparations were -completed, and I was ready for a start.</p> - -<p>I did not wish to go away without bidding adieu to Lady Trecastle, -so I had written her a farewell letter; and whilst Miss Smith was -putting on her things, I placed it where my stepmother would be -certain to find it on her return. It ran thus—</p> - -<p class="letter">"LADY TRECASTLE—In my opinion it is high time for me to see -the world and enjoy myself like other people, and as you seem -resolved that I shall do nothing of the kind, I am going to -settle the matter without asking your leave. I have timed my -departure to suit the sailing of a vessel which is going where I -wish to go, and by the time you receive this I shall be out of -England and far away. You and I have hit it off together so -badly, that I have no doubt you will regard my leaving as a -subject for sincere congratulations—which permit me to offer to -you. I fear that you will not receive them from any one else, on -account of the hypocritical appearance of grief under which you -are sure to think it necessary to conceal your real joy. I -foresee also that you will affect the utmost anxiety to recover -me; this will, of course, involve a considerable amount of -expense, since you will find it difficult to satisfy Mrs. Grundy -of the sincerity of your protestations, unless you employ -detectives, and send out far and wide in search of me. I reflect -on all this with pleasure, for I know well how you will grudge -every penny that is spent on so unworthy an object as myself; and -as I have no fear of being found, I am sure that the money will -be spent in vain. Think of that, Lady Trecastle, you who hate -waste—think of all that you'll have to throw away on <em>my</em> -account! Sincerely trusting that you and I may never meet again, -and that Margaret and Jane may be able to continue their studies -without the assistance which they have hitherto received from -the governesses who were supposed to be engaged for my sole -benefit—Believe me to remain, yours in no sense at all,</p> - -<p class="rightalign">INA TRECASTLE."</p> - -<p>It is not to be supposed from this letter that I had any idea of -going straight abroad; on the contrary, I had made up my mind to get -to London as quickly as possible, and there to hide myself, and be -lost to pursuit, by the time that my flight should be known. But -I put in the bit about leaving England on the chance of Lady -Trecastle's believing it to be my real intention, and being thereby -thrown on the wrong track, and caused extra worry and expense. She -being my especial enemy, I wanted to annoy her as much as I could; -and as my father always managed to slip out of whatever was -troublesome, I knew that all the bother of the search after me would -certainly fall upon her shoulders, and that the more troublesome and -costly it was, the more my longing for revenge would be gratified.</p> - -<p>It cost me nothing to leave my father. Since his second marriage he -and I had seen but little of each other—I having been kept closely -in the schoolroom, and he not having troubled himself to alter -whatever arrangements his wife thought fit to make. Whether I were at -home or not would make no difference to him I knew. I cared for no -one, and no one cared for me, exactly describes the condition in -which I was on that afternoon when I drove off from Castle Manor -with my tearful and apprehensive governess, to catch the 4.20 train -at Sparkton. I was leaving a home wherein was no person or thing that -was dear to me, where there was nothing for me to regret, to which I -was bound by no sweet or tender associations, and which had no kind -of hold over me. And I was about to exchange dulness and dreary -monotony for action, adventures, excitement, and an unknown state of -existence, where I must be always on the alert, ready for everything, -and trust to no one except myself. To all this I looked forward with -a delight that was not marred by the faintest tinge of timidity, -anxiety, or fear of failing in what I had set myself to accomplish. -No wonder that I was radiant with joy, and found some difficulty in -preserving my usual demeanour sufficiently not to arouse Miss Smith's -suspicions.</p> - -<h2 id="c6">CHAPTER VI.<br /> - -<small>A PHOTOGRAPH.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">There are two railway stations in Sparkton, which is a town of -sufficient size and importance to have two different railway -companies competing for its patronage; and this circumstance -rendered it all the easier for me to escape without leaving traces -for any pursuers to follow. The train by which I intended to go to -London would not leave until about two hours later than Miss Smith's -train to the north, and did not start from the same station. What, -therefore, I meant to do was to dismiss the coachman, John, and send -him home under the impression that I had gone away with my governess, -according to the announcement of my plans which I had made to our -Castle Manor household. Then, as soon as I had seen Miss Smith safely -off, I intended to take my bag in my hand, and proceed on foot to the -other station, there to await the departure of the London train.</p> - -<p>It would, of course, never do for Miss Smith to see the carriage, -which she imagined was going to take me home again, drive straight -away directly that it had deposited us at the station; so, when we -got out, I told John to wait a minute, and then accompanied her to -the ticket-office. Some other travellers who had arrived before us -were blocking up the entrance, and she had to wait her turn to take -her ticket. This delay greatly increased her nervousness, and she -began to be in a desperate fidget lest she should be too late. I -showed her, by the station-clock overhead, that she had fully ten -minutes to spare, but she was too much upset to be calmed by reason. -Pulling out her purse she commenced fumbling at it hurriedly, and -was dismayed to find that she could not open it. "Oh, Ina!" she -exclaimed, helplessly, "what <em>am</em> I to do? Something has happened to -my purse, and I can't get it open! Dear! dear! I <em>know</em> I shall be -too late! Can you lend me some money?"</p> - -<p>The purse would not open for the very excellent reason that she was -tugging at the hinges instead of at the clasp; I doubt whether she -would ever have found this out for herself in the condition in which -she then was; but I quickly saw what was the matter, and rectified it -for her. As soon as I had done so, I said, "By the by, there's a -parcel to be called for at a shop in the next street, which John will -have plenty of time to go and fetch whilst I'm waiting to see you -off. I forgot to tell him of it before I left the carriage, so I'm -just going to send him there. I won't be a minute, and shall be back -before you've got your ticket."</p> - -<p>The poor woman looked at me with a bewildered air at first, as though -she had hardly understood what I said to her, and felt only alarmed -at the idea of being left alone in the crowded station. Then, seeming -to realise the position of affairs all of a sudden, she answered -quickly, "Oh, but I forgot, hadn't you better go and do your shopping -at once without waiting for me to start? I'm afraid if the horses -were to catch cold or anything, Lady Trecastle would be very much -vexed; and, perhaps, she might think it was my fault. Not that I want -to lose your help, only I shouldn't like to make her angry. If these -people in front will only be quick, I <em>may</em> still be able to catch -the train perhaps!"</p> - -<p>"Don't be afraid—you've heaps of time," I returned; "and I'm sure -there's no chance of the horses taking cold; besides, they'll be kept -moving by going on this errand that I'm going to send them off for. -I mean to stay and see the last of you, put you comfortably into your -carriage, get you some papers to amuse yourself with on the journey, -and see that you don't forget anything at the last moment."</p> - -<p>In her then condition of mental disorganisation on account of her -anxiety about her sister, she was really hardly capable of looking -after herself. She seemed to be vaguely aware of this, and to regard -me as a sort of tower of strength which she could rely upon, and her -face brightened perceptibly at the assurance that she would have the -benefit of my protecting presence until she was fairly under weigh.</p> - -<p>"Thank you, dear Ina," she said, gratefully. "I'm so <em>much</em> obliged. -I can't tell you how kind and good I think it of you to give yourself -so much trouble about me."</p> - -<p>"Oh, it's no trouble," I replied, repressing with difficulty an -inclination to laugh at the thoroughness with which she was being -humbugged. So saying I left her, and hurried away to give John his -instructions. Though the situation struck me as being ludicrous, yet -I had an uncomfortable sense of being in a false position, and did -not feel particularly anxious to listen to her expressions of earnest -gratitude. I had, for my own purposes, deliberately thrown her into a -state of serious distress caused by what was absolutely false, and I -was now staying with her merely because it suited me to do so, and -not at all out of regard to her necessities; considering all this, it -did seem a little strong for me to be posing in the character of her -especial friend, and receiving thanks as though I were remaining to -see her off out of pure good nature! Yet, after all, I could not help -acting as I had done. I was bound to clear the course for myself -somehow or other; and if the process of being swept aside happened to -be unpleasant to any obstacle, why, that was unfortunate for the -obstacle, but no reason why the sweeping aside should be given up.</p> - -<p>Having told John that he need not wait any longer, I watched him -drive away, and then returned to my governess, who was, by that -time, again in need of assistance. She had paid for her ticket with -a £5 note, and received a considerable amount of change, which she -had managed to let slip through her trembling fingers as she was -transferring it to her purse, and it had rolled hither and thither on -the floor. Firmly convinced that the train was on the very point of -starting, she was, when I arrived, just about to hurry off and take -her seat, and abandon the money to its fate, though she could but ill -have afforded to lose it. Luckily I was in time to stop this folly, -and persuaded her to stay and join me in picking up the scattered -coins, which we soon accomplished. Whilst thus employed, I could not -help reflecting on how differently she and I were constituted, and -on how much the most fit I was to look after myself.</p> - -<p>It must be a queer sensation, thought I, to care for any one to such -a pitch as she does. Fancy being in such a state of mind as she is at -the mere idea of some other person's being ill, or in trouble of some -kind or other! Well, I thank my stars I am somewhat tougher than -that, and not <em>quite</em> such a softy. Precious little chance I should -have, else, of shifting for myself, and fighting my own way in the -world, as I mean to do!</p> - -<p>It was with a sense of pity, wherein (as is often the case) there was -a strong admixture of contempt, that I escorted her to the train, -found her the right carriage, established her in it with such -travelling comforts as were to be had, repeated over and over the -names of the places where she would have to change before reaching -Carlisle, for fear of her forgetting them, and paid her whatever -other little attentions I could think of. She, poor woman, was quite -overwhelmed at such thoughtful politeness on my part, and received it -with the utmost gratitude, without dreaming for an instant of the -desire to make some kind of amends for the anxiety I had brought upon -her, which was the real motive of my unwontedly civil behaviour.</p> - -<p>I tried hard to raise her spirits, and when the train began to move I -walked beside it for a step or two saying cheerful parting words to -her. Faster and faster did the long line of carriages slip along by -the platform, and I stood still, watching her wave me a farewell with -her tear-besprinkled handkerchief. In a minute more she had passed -out of sight, and I felt, that now the last link of my chain was -indeed broken, that I had got rid of all the authorities whom I -detested, and that I was in very truth my own mistress.</p> - -<p>The first thing for me to do now was to make my way to the other -station, and there await the starting of my train for London. In -order to avoid the risk of being recognised by any one in traversing -the town, I had, before leaving home, put into my pocket a thick -veil; this I now donned, and then, with my bag in my hand, issued -out into the streets. Here I soon had cause to congratulate myself on -having taken the precaution to wear a veil, for, on turning a corner, -I suddenly found myself confronted by our own carriage, with John on -the box, drawn up close to the pavement. John was profiting by the -absence of his master's family to do some shopping on his own -account, and also to enjoy the society of a female acquaintance, who -was perched up on the seat beside him, displaying manifold and -gaudy ribbons from that point of vantage with an air of immense -complacency. Though he glanced at me as I passed, he did not -recognise me through my thick veil, and I reached my destination in -safety, without meeting any one else whom I knew.</p> - -<p>The train by which I was going was not due to start for some time to -come, and I could not take a ticket for it yet. As I was anxious not -to attract observation by being seen hanging about the station, I -withdrew into the waiting-room with a book in my hand, and settled -myself there quietly, as if to pass the time in reading. I was, -in truth, too much excited to fix my attention on my book, but I -wished to <em>appear</em> to be engrossed in it all the same; and as it is -obviously impossible to read much through a thick veil, I threw mine -back when I began to pretend to study the volume which I held.</p> - -<p>I was undisturbed in my seclusion for a considerable while; but just -as I was beginning to think that it was getting near time for the -train to start, and that the ticket-office would soon be open, two -ladies entered the room, attended by a footman laden with their -rugs, bags, and etceteras. These he deposited on the table and then -retired, touching his hat respectfully, and saying that the tickets -would not be given out for another five minutes.</p> - -<p>The lady nearest me was a middle-aged person. I saw at a glance, as -she entered the room, that she was a complete stranger to me, and I -looked at her carelessly, without at first noticing her younger -companion. I had, for the moment, forgotten that my veil was up; but -then, suddenly remembering it, and also the expediency of concealing -my face before going to take my ticket, I was just about to lower the -odious stifling mass of thick gauze, when the younger lady moved -towards the table to take something out of her travelling-bag. She -looked at me in passing, and as our eyes met I felt a thrill of -alarm, and a conviction that she was some one I had met before, -though I could not recollect where or how, or what her name was. -Luckily she had evidently no recollection of me, but passed on -without a gleam of recognition in her face, got what she wanted out -of the bag, and returned to her seat. None the less, I was perfectly -certain I knew her, and all at once it flashed across me who she was. -She must be Kitty Mervyn, the girl whom I had met and taken a strong -fancy to at Lugano four years ago. Since then we had both of us grown -and altered considerably in appearance, and she had developed into a -tall, handsome, stately-looking young woman. But it was so uncommon -an event for any one to make any great impression on me, that I was -not likely to forget whoever had been able to work that miracle, and -I felt positive that I could not now be mistaken as to Kitty's -identity. I perceived, also, that she had no idea whatever of who I -was, which was most fortunate for me, as it would have greatly -interfered with my plans to be seen there by any one who knew me. -I was quite aware of this, and rejoiced at my good luck; and -yet—strange creatures that we are!—even whilst I rejoiced, I -suffered a pang of keen mortification. Hardly ever in my life had I -felt disposed to honour one of my fellow-creatures with any especial -degree of liking or approval; and when, for once, I had been moved to -do so, it seemed as if the individual thus distinguished ought -certainly to have felt some corresponding amount of inclination for -me. Yet this had not been the case, since Kitty Mervyn had forgotten -me, though I had not forgotten her. And therefore I had a sense of -annoyance and humiliation at this forgetfulness, notwithstanding its -opportuneness, and the inconvenience that it would have been to me to -be recognised just then, when it was my great object to leave no -trace that could show what had become of me after the time that I had -parted from Miss Smith.</p> - -<p>As soon as the ticket-office was open, the footman returned to inform -the ladies of that fact; then they left the waiting-room attended by -the man carrying their <i class="loanword">impedimenta</i> for them as before. Having -stayed a minute longer to let them get out of the way, I was on the -point of following them, when I noticed a small article lying under -the table, and picked it up. It was one of those purses that are -purse and pocket-book combined, and I guessed that it had probably -fallen out of Miss Mervyn's bag when she had opened it just now to -take out something else. What should I do with the purse? I had -little doubt of who the rightful owner was, and could easily restore -it to her if I chose. Only the question was whether I <em>did</em> choose, -for there was no one near to see me find it, and I was free to do as -I pleased. At some other time I might, perhaps, have followed the -dictates of honesty, but at the present moment I was out of charity -with Kitty. I had not forgiven her for the wound which she had -unconsciously inflicted on my self-esteem, and was much more inclined -to spite her, if I had a chance, than to do her a good turn; -therefore, after hesitating for a few moments, I pocketed what I -had found, postponing the examination of its contents to the first -opportunity when I should be at leisure and unobserved.</p> - -<p>Now that I was going to trust to my own resources for a livelihood, -money was a most important object to me, and as I had no intention of -wasting it in needless luxury, I contented myself with a humble -third-class ticket. Having secured this, I took my seat in the -London train, and was, in due course of time, whirled away from -Sparkton towards the metropolis, where I meant to seek my fortune. -At starting there were two or three other passengers in the carriage -with me, but they got out at the first few stations where we stopped, -and when I found myself alone I thought I might as well take that -opportunity of seeing what Miss Mervyn's purse contained.</p> - -<p>I was glad to find in it several pounds in gold and silver. Some -extra cash would be extremely handy to me in present circumstances, -and would no doubt be far more useful to me than to her, I thought. -Then I turned to the pocket-book half of the purse, and began to -explore that also. Here there were some postage stamps, a set of -directions for some kind of fancy-work that was just then all the -fashion, and a letter addressed to the Hon. Katherine Mervyn—which -last was a conclusive proof that my conjecture as to the ownership of -the purse was right. I took the liberty of unfolding and reading the -letter, which was a heavy bill for gloves and fans. The largeness of -the amount caused me a surprise, which was soon changed into envy as -I reflected that I, too, might have been in a state to require a -similar profusion of these articles, if my step-mother had not -unjustly shut me off from the privileges of my age and rank in life. -It was strange how the perusal of that bill, and the thought that it -had been incurred by a girl no older than myself, irritated me afresh -against Lady Trecastle, and increased my former sense of being a much -injured and aggrieved mortal!</p> - -<p>The bill, stamps, and work directions appeared at first sight to -comprise the whole contents of the pocket-book; I was about to shut -it up under that impression, when I bethought me that I was in want -of a new purse, as mine was a good deal worn, and that if Kitty's -was in good condition I had better substitute it for my own. This -idea made me take up again the one I had found, and look it over -carefully. The close inspection revealed an inner pocket underneath -the flap of the other, and ingeniously contrived so as not to attract -notice. Within this sly hiding-place was a piece of cardboard wrapped -in silver paper, which, on being opened, disclosed the photograph of -a very good-looking young man in military uniform. My curiosity was -aroused as to who the original might be, and I turned it round and -round in hopes of discovering some name or initial; there was, -however, nothing of the kind except the name of the photographer to -be found, and so my curiosity remained unsatisfied.</p> - -<p>Whoever could that young man be? I wondered, and why was he so -interesting to Kitty that she carried his picture about with her, -done up and concealed with such care? It was not a brother, as I knew -that she had none. Was she engaged to be married, and was it the -likeness of her future husband? Only in that case the portrait would -be more likely to be carried openly than to be thus hidden away in -the inmost recess of her purse, as if it were a thing to be ashamed -of.</p> - -<p>As I mused over it, and over the desire for secrecy that seemed to be -conveyed by the place where I had found it, the thought crossed my -mind whether it could be some unacknowledged lover, whose addresses -were being paid against the wishes of her parents. Yet somehow I -could hardly fancy that to be very probable either. There was a -stateliness and haughtiness about her that gave the impression of a -person who would be most unlikely ever to condescend to anything so -mean and underhand as a clandestine love affair; she would have too -much self-respect and sense of dignity. Well! be the young man who he -might, I had no clue to his identity or to his connection with her, -and it was no use my bothering myself with vain speculations on the -subject. At all events, she would have to get a new copy of his -photograph, as I had no intention of returning the one that had -fallen into my hands. And with that reflection I dismissed the matter -from my mind, and applied myself to the more practical consideration -of what my immediate future was to be.</p> - -<h2 id="c7">CHAPTER VII.<br /> - -<small>A FEW LONDON PRICES.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">I have not, as yet, said anything about what I meant to do on -reaching London, and how I intended to support myself; but it must -not, therefore, be supposed that I had not carefully considered, and -fully made up my mind upon that important matter. Various ways by -which a young woman in my position might earn her livelihood had -suggested themselves to me; and, after mature deliberation, I had -selected the avocations of daily-governess, shop-assistant, or -travelling-maid, as being those in which I was most likely to -succeed.</p> - -<p>This reduced the limits of my choice to three. For awhile I remained -uncertain to which of the three I should give the preference, but -finally came to the conclusion that the latter was the one for which -I was best fitted by my gifts—both natural and acquired. Lack of -training would, of course, make it foolish for me to think of -undertaking the place of an ordinary stay-at-home lady's-maid, but -that training was by no means so essential for a travelling Abigail. -What would be chiefly wanted for such a situation was, a knowledge of -languages, a good head, a capacity for looking after luggage, and -such abilities as would enable the maid to supply the place of -courier whenever necessary; and in all these respects I had little -fear of being capable of giving satisfaction to any employer. As far -as needlework was concerned, I could do plain sewing well enough; -and though I did not know how to make dresses, yet I anticipated -no difficulty on that score, because, as it would evidently be -unreasonable to expect a servant to have cultivated both brains and -fingers alike, therefore proficiency in an inferior art, like -dressmaking, was not to be looked for in a person who had studied the -far higher branch of knowledge—languages. And, besides that, people -did not generally want to have clothes made when they were on their -travels.</p> - -<p>There was another part of a lady's-maid's business which was much -more likely to be required, and of which, also, I was at present -ignorant; and that was hairdressing. But that was a deficiency which -could easily be remedied by some lessons from a good hairdresser; and -the first thing that I meant to do in London was to inquire for an -artist of this kind, and become his pupil until I had learnt from him -enough of the art to fit me for a maid's place. Of course, paying for -the lessons, and finding myself meanwhile in board and lodging, would -cost money—and expense was a consideration that was on no account to -be overlooked. But I was prepared to practise strict economy; and, -what with the contents of Kitty Mervyn's purse and my own, I had -enough to live upon for some weeks at least, and did not doubt that -my resources would hold out till I should have learnt sufficient -hairdressing for my purpose. Altogether I believed that I should make -a capital travelling-maid; and it was an occupation especially -attractive to me, because well adapted to gratify my taste for much -change and amusement.</p> - -<p>One thing which I did during the journey to London was to effect a -considerable change in my appearance. The more I could make myself -look unlike what I had been when I left home, the greater would be my -security against pursuit, and I did not neglect the opportunity -for doing this which was afforded by the solitude of the railway -carriage. I had not got the materials for a complete disguise, but a -good deal may be done with a different neck-wrap and pair of gloves, -and a brush, comb, needle and thread. These things I had stowed -away in my bag, and by their aid I soon contrived sufficiently to -alter my exterior to make it unlikely that I should be identified -as corresponding to any description that might be given of the -Gilbertina Trecastle who had seen off her governess at Sparkton -Station.</p> - -<p>By the time we reached London night had set in. As we steamed slowly -into the spacious and brilliantly lit-up terminus, the bustling, -animated scene which I beheld gave me a thrill of delight, and a -pleasant sense of having undoubtedly got away from the tranquil -duck-pond where I had been vegetating, and having entered the rushing -stream of life—a stream which tolerates none of the slimy scum and -weed that are apt to accumulate on the surface of stagnation, but -speedily washes away every vestige of them.</p> - -<p>I saw railway officials of various grades hurrying to and fro, and -all intent on some business or other. Loud shouts for hansoms and -fourwheelers began to echo through the glazed walls of the great -station even before the train had stopped. Porters swarmed at the -windows of carriages still in motion, jumped on to the steps, opened -the doors, commenced taking out hand-bags, wraps, umbrellas, and -similar small articles, reiterated eager exclamations of "Cab, sir? -Cab, mum? Any luggage? Where from?" etc., and vied with one another -in pressing their services upon all passengers from whom a tip was -likely to be expected. Under this head the occupants of third-class -carriages were evidently not included, and not one of the offers of -assistance that were being lavished so freely in other directions -fell to my share, as I emerged from my compartment with the bag that -contained all my goods in my hand. It was a neglect, however, which I -certainly did not wish altered under the circumstances, as the less -notice I attracted, the better was my chance of evading any enquiries -that might subsequently be made about me.</p> - -<p>It was too late that night to set about hunting for a lodging, but -as hotels are usually to be found in close proximity to railway -stations, I had no fear of having to go far for a bed. I was not -mistaken in this confidence. No sooner had I got into the street -than I saw just before me an immense building with the words RAILWAY -HOTEL flaring in large coloured letters upon a gas transparency over -the door; and underneath this inscription was another, in smaller -sized letters, stating that within this magnificent hotel travellers -of all classes were supplied with every comfort and luxury at -extremely moderate prices.</p> - -<p>Turning my steps thither, I entered through the open doors into a -large, softly-carpeted, handsomely-furnished hall, where a porter in -a gorgeous livery and sundry waiters were lounging about and talking. -To one of these I addressed myself, requesting to be shown a room -for the night, and adding that I wished it to be as inexpensive a -one as possible. My request was referred to the presiding genius -in the hall, who was an elegantly attired young lady, with the most -nonchalant expression of countenance that it was ever my fortune to -behold. She was deeply engaged in a book; but on being spoken to she -put it down, glanced at a list of rooms, rang a bell, uttered -oracularly the single word "18," then resumed her volume, and at once -became as deeply absorbed in it again as though her studies had never -been interrupted at all.</p> - -<p>Meanwhile, one of her satellites conducted me up innumerable stairs -to the chamber assigned to me—lowness of price and of situation -being in the usual inverse proportions. At last we arrived at No. 18, -which proved to be a room small enough to have done duty as a convent -cell, and scantily furnished with a table, a chair, a cracked and -fly-spotted little looking-glass, a washing-stand, a tiny chest of -drawers, and a short narrow bedstead, whereon was an abominably hard -and fusty-smelling mattress.</p> - -<p>The charge for one night's occupation of this palatial apartment was -5s., and for that sum one would have supposed that a little civility -from the hotel servants might well have been thrown into the bargain, -without there being any danger of the visitor's receiving an unfair -amount of return for the money spent. Such, however, was by no means -the opinion of the waiters and chambermaids, who were at no pains -to hide the supreme scorn with which they were inspired by the -spectacle of a traveller attempting to combine hotel-life with -economy. To their minds the two things evidently were, and ought to -be, absolutely incompatible; and I am inclined to think that they -deemed it one of the objects for which they had been put into the -world, to make that incompatibility as plainly apparent as possible.</p> - -<p>Fortunately for me, I was as little affected by their contempt as I -was by the indifferent quality of the accommodation provided. Neither -the nasty smell of my couch nor its hardness, nor yet the sense of -being an object of scorn to a pack of waiters and chambermaids, had -power to interfere with my repose; for I slept soundly all night, and -awoke in the morning as much refreshed as though I had tenanted the -most luxurious room imaginable. Observing a tariff of hotel prices -hanging up over the washing-stand, I proceeded to read it as soon as -I was dressed. From this document I learnt that a single cup of tea -or coffee was to be had for 6d. (would that include milk and sugar? I -wondered), and that the cost of a breakfast, consisting of tea or -coffee and bread and butter, was 1s. 6d. Not bad that, thought I, -for a place which professes to supply every comfort and luxury at -extremely moderate prices! I should rather like to know what is the -landlord's idea of <em>im</em>moderate ones.</p> - -<p>Paying for food at this rate was not exactly consistent with the -rigid economy which my circumstances imposed upon me, so I sallied -forth to procure breakfast elsewhere. This was not difficult to -accomplish, as there was a tidy little restaurant only two doors off, -where, for the sum of 6d., I was supplied with coffee, a good-sized -roll, and a pat of butter—all of excellent quality. The small round -table on which the food was served was destitute of a cloth, but -quite clean; and I ate my meal with as hearty a relish, and enjoyed -it every bit as much, as though it had cost 150 per cent more, and -been consumed in the sumptuous coffee-room of the hotel.</p> - -<p>The proprietor of the restaurant was an Italian. I was, just then, -his sole customer, and, as he did not seem particularly busy, I spoke -to him in his own language when I went to the counter to pay for my -breakfast, and asked him if he happened to know of any one who gave -lessons in hairdressing. The chance of a conversation in his native -tongue appeared to please him; for he became so communicative that I -think it would have needed but little encouragement on my part to -draw from him, there and then, the whole history of his life. With -some difficulty, however, I managed to check his confidences, and to -keep him to the point on which I required information.</p> - -<p>Did he know any one to teach hairdressing? He must consider a moment. -Yes, to be sure! there was his friend, Monsieur Candot, a French -<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">parruchiére</i>, who could do hair, make frisettes, plaits, puffs, -curls, wigs, everything. He was not <em>certain</em> that Monsieur Candot -gave lessons; but thought it highly probable.</p> - -<p>Had Monsieur Candot much practice? I asked; because otherwise he -would not suit me, as I wished only to learn of a really high-class -and fashionable hairdresser. Then, seeing the Italian's face clouding -over at the idea of my venturing to doubt the superior talent of a -man whom he recommended and called his friend, I hastened to smooth -down his ruffled feelings by adding that I felt sure he would excuse -my asking the question, because—as he well knew—there were wigs and -wigs, and the mere fact of making them did not necessarily imply that -they were made well; that, in short, if it were permissible to take -liberties with Giusti's epigram about bookmaking, one might say—</p> - -<div class="poetry-container" lang="it" xml:lang="it"> -<div class="poetry"> -<div class="verse">"Il far' un' parrúcca è meno che niénte,</div> -<div class="verse indent2">Se parrúcca fatte non piace la gente."</div> -</div> -</div> - -<p>This pacified the Italian's rising ire. There could be no possible -doubt, he said, of his friend's wonderful talent. Monsieur Candot was -a genuine artist, who never executed any work of art that was not -first-rate, because, if it fell short of the perfection at which he -aimed, he would destroy it unhesitatingly, and make another and more -successful one in its place. His merit was appreciated everywhere; he -was in request in the very highest circles, and made wigs "<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">anche per -le duchesse</i>."</p> - -<p>There was no resisting such a recommendation as this, so I procured -Monsieur Candot's address, and set off to find him. He resided in a -small street near Edgeware Road, and when I got to his abode I was -fortunate enough to find him disengaged, and to be admitted without -delay to his presence. I told him I was a maid who was anxious to -learn hairdressing, and asked if he gave lessons in that art. He -replied in the affirmative, saying also that he was constantly -having applications like mine, and that he had no doubt of being -able to make an expert <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">coiffeuse</i> of me in about a month—however -ignorant of the matter I might now be. Was I going to take the -lessons on my own account, or was it by the wish of my mistress?</p> - -<p>At the time I could not conceive what was the motive of this -question; but I subsequently discovered it to be, that his price for -lessons given to a maid at her mistress's expense was nearly double -what it was when the maid paid for them out of her own pocket. I, in -my present state of life, highly approved of this practice; and, as -my answer showed me to be entitled to the benefit of the lower rate -of payment, our terms were soon arranged, and the interview came to -a satisfactory termination.</p> - -<p>So far, so good; and now to find myself a cheap habitation not far -from Monsieur Candot's residence. After wandering about for some time -in the neighbouring streets, I discovered a lodging that seemed -likely to be suitable. The landlady, however—either because a long -experience of lodgers had made her distrust them as a body, or else -because there was something she objected to in my appearance—did not -evince much eagerness to let her room. She hesitated and eyed me -doubtfully, demanding what was my name and occupation, and whether I -could pay a week in advance—<i class="loanword">i.e.</i> fifteen shillings.</p> - -<p>I had already determined that, whenever I should be asked for my -name, I would adopt the abbreviation that had been bestowed upon me -in my earliest years; so I replied that I was a lady's-maid called -Caroline Jill; that I had recently left a situation; and that I did -not intend looking out for another until I had had some hairdressing -lessons. And, as I spoke, I laid upon the table the rent in advance -which she had asked for.</p> - -<p>There was nothing at all improbable in my story, and the sight of -the money gave her confidence, so she consented to receive me as a -lodger. I then bethought me that she would be almost sure to expect -a lady's-maid to be accompanied by at least one big box, and that her -distrust might very likely be reawakened at sight of the extremely -modest amount of luggage which I had to bring; so I mentioned, -casually, that I had left almost all my goods at home in the country, -and had only a very small bag with me, as it was so inconvenient to -be moving about with a lot of heavy things. And having thus prepared -her mind for the diminutive size of my bag, I set off to fetch it -from the hotel.</p> - -<p>The hairdressing lessons were not to take place till the evenings, -or late in the afternoons, so that I should be idle during the -greater part of each day; and, as I returned to the hotel, I began -considering how to employ profitably all the spare time that I should -have on my hands. Evidently the thing to suit me would be a temporary -engagement as daily-governess, as I should then be adding to my -slender stock of money even whilst paying for Candot's instructions. -I would endeavour to get such an engagement as soon as possible; and, -in order to lose no time about it, I would go straight to the hotel -reading-room, where I should be sure to find the day's newspapers, -wherein I might perhaps meet with some advertisements that it would -be worth my while to answer.</p> - -<p>On reaching the hotel, therefore, I turned along a passage over which -was a notice to the effect that it led to the reading-room. A waiter -outside stared at me with wrathful surprise, as if he thought that -the luxuries of that apartment were unlawful for any one badly off -for money, and that it was the height of presumption for so humble -a person as myself to attempt to enjoy them. But I knew well that -whoever stays at a hotel has a right to profit by its reading-room; -so I walked calmly in, without heeding his indignant looks. Daily -and weekly newspapers, journals, and periodicals of various kinds, -were spread on the table, and I proceeded diligently to study the -advertisements for daily governesses which they contained. It was not -every such place which would do for me, as I wanted one situated in -London, and where only morning work was required, therefore I had -some difficulty in discovering an advertisement that was at all -likely to suit. At last, however, I hit upon a couple in the <cite>Morning -Post</cite> that seemed tolerably promising; and as it was too late to -think of going to apply for them on that day, I copied the addresses -for use on the morrow, and then left the room.</p> - -<p>As I entered the hall on my way upstairs a gentleman who had come to -call upon some one staying at the hotel was in the act of leaving his -card. It was a strange coincidence that that particular individual -should have happened to be there at the very moment when I was -passing through; for I immediately saw that he was the original of -the mysterious photograph which had been put away so snugly in Miss -Mervyn's purse, and as to which I had felt inquisitive. Surely now I -should be able to gratify my curiosity so far as to find out his -name, I thought, and, so thinking, lingered in the hall in hopes of -an opportunity for attaining that object.</p> - -<p>Not far from the door there were a lot of pigeon-holes for the -purpose of receiving any letters and cards that might arrive -for visitors at the hotel; and in one of these receptacles the -gentleman's card was deposited by the servant to whom he gave it. -This afforded me the chance I wanted. Pretending that I thought -there might be a letter for me, I went to the pigeon-holes and -inspected the bit of pasteboard just placed there, and thus learnt -that its owner's name was Edward Norroy, and that he was a captain -in the Fusiliers.</p> - -<p>Well, that was <em>something</em> to have discovered about him, certainly, -but not very much; I had never heard the name before, and was still -as far off as ever from knowing what he and Kitty had to do with one -another, and why she should care to carry his picture about in her -pocket. It was no business of mine, of course, as I very well knew. -Yet the singular attractiveness which she had for me made me feel -more interest in her concerns than in those of the generality of -human-kind. It was strange, too, considering that I had seen her but -twice in my life, and was by no means of an impressionable nature, -nor yet particularly inquisitive. But that did not prevent me from -speculating about her to an extent at which I myself was astonished; -I had an idea that I should like to be able to observe her, and study -her character.</p> - -<p>Reflecting how queer it was to take so much interest in the affairs -of a person with whom I had absolutely nothing to do, and wondering -whether it did not show a tendency to reprehensible weak-mindedness, -I left the hall, and climbed up to my bedroom. I had very little -packing-up to get through, so I was soon ready to depart, and then I -rang the bell and asked for my bill.</p> - -<p>It might, not unreasonably, have been supposed that the 5s. which was -the price of the room I had occupied would have fully paid for all -that I had had from the hotel, and left a pretty fair margin for -profit as well. Not so, however, was the opinion of the manager; for -a tiny foot-tub and jug of water which I had used to wash myself in -on rising were dignified in the bill by the name of "bath;" and for -that, and for "attendance," an extra half-crown was tacked on to my -expenses. I had had quite enough experience of hotel bills to know -that "attendance" was an inevitable item on them, and that it was -no use grumbling at the charge. Still, I had found the article so -unusually conspicuous by its absence in the present instance, that I -could not resist the desire I felt to give a little bit of my mind on -the subject to the chambermaid who had brought me the bill, and was -now waiting for its payment.</p> - -<p>"What an odd thing it is," said I, gravely, "that <em>attendance</em> and -<em>nothing</em> should be two words that have precisely the same meaning. -Don't you think so?"</p> - -<p>I spoke with the utmost seriousness, and I think that she imagined -I was going to dispute the bill. "Do I think what?" she returned, -pertly; "I don't know what you're talking about."</p> - -<p>"Why," replied I, "if you look at this bill, you will see that -<em>attendance</em> is charged just as if it were something extra which -had really been supplied to me; that is not the case, as you are -perfectly well aware, so the natural inference is that the word must -mean nothing, you see. Otherwise one would be obliged to suppose that -those three syllables had some special privilege attached to them -to enable hotelkeepers to rob people openly and with impunity; for -there certainly isn't any other article—such as dinner, wine, -drawing-room, etc.—which a visitor can be made to pay for if -he hasn't had it. I thought you might have been struck by the -singularity of this circumstance, but probably you are too much -accustomed to it to think it odd. Here's the money; I wish to have -the receipt as soon as possible, if you please."</p> - -<p>The woman coloured angrily, and looked as if she had an uncivil reply -at the tip of her tongue. Just as I finished speaking, however, a -bell rang which she was called to go and answer, so she was compelled -to deny herself the pleasure of a retort. She hurried away, muttering -something about having no time to waste in listening to all the -rubbish that fools found time to talk; and the receipted bill was -presently brought to me by another of the servants.</p> - -<p>Taking my little bag in my hand, I descended the stairs and bade -adieu to the grand Railway Hotel, without feeling the very slightest -inclination ever again to make proof of the accommodation which -it offered "at extremely moderate prices" to "travellers of all -classes." Yet I myself told lies unhesitatingly whenever I found -them convenient; so what right had I to complain of other people -for doing the same?</p> - -<h2 id="c8">CHAPTER VIII.<br /> - -<small>A STREET INCIDENT.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">Before going to bed that night I wished to arrange my plans for the -next day, and to make up my mind which of the two daily-governess -situations that I had in view I would apply for first. For this -purpose I carefully compared the advertisements together to see if -either one contained anything that made it seem likely to be -preferable to the other. As, however, there did not appear to be a -pin's point to choose between them, I left the selection to chance, -and settled the question by tossing. The result of this appeal to -hazard was to decide me to try first for the place of A. G., who -required personal application to be made between noon and two o'clock -in the afternoon, at a given address somewhere in the Bayswater -district.</p> - -<p>It was no use going there before the hour specified, and I did -not feel in the humour to settle down to any steady occupation -till it was time to start, so I spent most of the following morning -in watching what went on in the street below my window, and making -guesses as to the characters and employments of the various -passers-by. Amongst these there was one to whom my attention was -particularly attracted. This was a little girl of about nine or ten -years old, with a basket containing some bunches of common flowers -for sale. It was quite early in the morning when first I noticed her, -and afterwards I saw her pass my window again and again; for though, -at intervals, she made excursions into other neighbouring streets, -yet after each of these excursions she returned to the one wherein -my lodging was situated. At first she looked tolerably bright -and smiling as she ran here and there, making assiduous efforts -to dispose of her stock in trade. But she was not in luck's way, -and failed to sell a single bunch; and she evidently took this -ill-success greatly to heart, for all the smiles and cheerfulness -gradually died away from her face, and she looked increasingly sad -and melancholy each time that I saw her pass.</p> - -<p>Presently a big coarse-looking woman, who was also selling flowers, -came into the street. She and the child met, and stopped to talk, -just opposite my window; and though I could not hear what they said, -yet their looks and gestures enabled me to make a very fair guess -at what they were talking about. The little girl, I could see, was -timidly asking some favour which the woman refused. The child, though -apparently much in awe of the other, yet seemed to screw up her -courage to urge the petition; evidently she desired very much to have -it granted, as I could see by the pitifully earnest wistfulness -expressed in her countenance, as she looked up with quivering lips, -and eyes brimful of tears. Whatever her request was, however, the -woman had no mind to grant it; and, seeming to become impatient at -the child's persistency, pushed her away roughly and left the street. -For a minute or so after her departure the little girl stood sobbing, -and looking a picture of disappointment and misery. Then, using the -corner of her shawl as a pocket-handkerchief, she dried her eyes, -blew her nose, and mournfully resumed her former occupation.</p> - -<p>She did not again come in sight of my window, so I saw no more of her -till it was time for me to start on my situation-hunting expedition.</p> - -<p>I was walking down towards Oxford Street, with my head full of my own -affairs, when I heard a shrill, quavering, little voice pipe out -close at my elbow: "Flowers, lady! bootifle fresh flowers. Won't you -please buy a bunch?" Looking down, I saw beside me the same little -girl whom I had previously been watching.The contents of her basket -were still undiminished, and she was sitting wearily on a door-step, -but now started up to offer me her wares, and try to induce me to -become a customer. Though I could do very well without flowers, yet I -liked them, and thought they would be a considerable improvement to -my dingy little lodging; besides, I pitied the child for the bad luck -she had hitherto had that morning; so altogether I had half a mind to -buy of her. But then the warning voice of prudence interfered, saying -that I had no money to waste on vanities like flowers, and that -the more I departed from my strict rule of denying myself every -superfluity, the more irksome it would be to keep to it at all. I -thought prudence was perfectly right, so I followed her counsel, and -replied to the little flower-seller; "No, thank you; I don't want -any."</p> - -<p>She, however, was unwilling to take a refusal, and exclaimed; "Oh, -but do <em>please</em>'ave some, dear lady. Sitch bootifle flowers, they -be! Jest one bunch!"</p> - -<p>I was not going to offend my inward monitor by disregarding her -advice, so I merely shook my head, and walked on.</p> - -<p>For a few steps the child trotted beside me, continuing her -importunities, but desisted when she found I was not to be moved. I -looked back to see what she was doing when I reached the corner of -the street, and saw that she had buried her face in her shawl, and -was crying bitterly.</p> - -<p>I was provoked at such a very unpractical proceeding; and, thinking -that at all events a word of good advice would cost me nothing to -give, and that perhaps she might be the better for it, I returned to -her, and said: "Now, you know, it's excessively silly of you to -behave like that, and you'd much better dry your eyes. You're just -as likely as not to be losing a chance of a customer while you're -crying, and you don't want to do that, do you?"</p> - -<p>"Oh, <em>indeed</em> but I can't 'elp crying," she replied, between her -violent sobs; "it's cos I'se so 'ungry—so dreffle 'ungry."</p> - -<p>"What makes you so hungry?" said I. "Didn't you have enough -breakfast?"</p> - -<p>"I 'asn't 'ad none at all," she returned. "When mother sent me out -this mornin', she said as I shouldn't 'ave no brexshus till I'd got -the money for it with these 'ere flowers; and she telled me the same -a bit ago, when I met 'er and axed 'er to let in 'ave a penny to buy -suthun to eat, cos no one wouldn't buy none of the flowers, and I was -jest starved. She sez as it's all my fault for not selling' of 'em, -and that if I wasn't idle, I could get rid of 'em fast enuff. But -that's not true, for I'se done my best—indeed I 'as!"</p> - -<p>It really did seem a hard case. I knew, from personal observation, -that the charge of idleness was undeserved, and it was very unfair to -make the poor little thing suffer for a slackness of trade which she -could not help. To keep a growing child running about all the morning -in the open air without giving it a morsel of food to appease its -hunger till nearly twelve o'clock, was a piece of barbarity that -quite shocked me. For, however hard I may be by nature, and however -apt to drive my own barrow through the world without troubling myself -about the toes that happen to be in the way and to get pinched, yet I -do not think I have ever been guilty of gratuitous cruelty to either -man or beast; indeed, the mere sight of it always fills me with -disgust.</p> - -<p>The mention of breakfast gave me a sudden bright idea of how to -assist the child without laying myself open to the reproaches of -prudence. Had I not saved a shilling the day before by breakfasting -at the restaurant instead of at the hotel? and was not a penny saved -a penny gained? I had never calculated on being able to begin gaining -anything as yet, so that that shilling was an addition to my funds -which I had not reckoned upon, and which I was clearly entitled to -regard as an extra—a thing that I could throw away or do what I -pleased with—an accidental item which need not be entered on my -receipts at all, so that prudence had no right to expect to be -consulted as to what was done with it. And, feeling quite certain of -the soundness of this argument, I did not wait to hear whether -prudence took the same view of the matter or not, but instantly -presented the coin to the child, recommending her to spend part of it -now in getting breakfast, and to reserve the remainder against some -future emergency.</p> - -<p>The sight and feel of the shilling checked her tears with surprising -quickness, and her wan, melancholy, little physiognomy brightened up -wonderfully. Holding her basket towards me, she offered either to let -me pick out the best flowers for myself, or else to do it for me if I -liked; adding, with a slight hesitation, that perhaps there <em>might</em> -be one or two old flowers since yesterday that had got mixed among -this morning's lot, and if so, she would be more likely to know the -fresh ones than I should. The touch of confusion with which this was -said, made me suspect that the contents of her basket were by no -means so fresh as she professed them to be, and that she, being well -aware of that fact, was moved by an impulse of gratitude to proffer -her services as chooser in order that I might not be cheated.</p> - -<p>Evidently it would be prudent to accept her offer if I wanted to have -anything out of her basket. But that was just what I felt rather -doubtful about doing. I had intended the shilling as a free gift, and -had had no idea of receiving anything in return; besides that, it -would be a nuisance to have a handful of flowers to carry about with -me, and they would probably have begun to fade by the time I got -home; so, altogether, I at first thought I would refuse them. On -second thoughts, however, I changed my mind. The flowers would -certainly brighten up my room, and I knew that I should like them if -I could have them transported there without trouble; and, after -all, it was just as well to have some value for one's money; and -as she took it for granted that I should do so, there would be no -disappointment to her in my having them. I said therefore—</p> - -<p>"Will you pick me out a couple of good, fresh bunches, take them to a -house that is not far off, and leave them there, with a message that -Miss Caroline Jill wishes to have them put in water till she comes -back?"</p> - -<p>"'Iss, lady," she answered; "I'll pick you the werry bestest and -freshest as I 'as—and thank you kindly for what you've give me. -What's the 'ouse as I'm to take 'em to?"</p> - -<p>I gave her the address of my lodging, and then we separated; she -disappearing into the nearest baker's shop, and I continuing my way -to A. G. My experience of life had not given me enough confidence in -human nature to make me think it very likely that a street child was -to be relied upon to keep a promise; and consequently I thought it -highly problematical that I should find any flowers awaiting me on my -return. But yet I did not the least regret the shilling I had thrown -away upon her. It was a satisfaction to think that her hunger was -being appeased, at any rate; indeed, if I had not known that that had -been done, I should have exposed myself to the risk of feeling -uncomfortable whenever I thought of her ravenous condition all day. -So I had evidently acted for my own interest as well as hers.</p> - -<h2 id="c9">CHAPTER IX.<br /> - -<small>A NERVOUS LADY.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">One of the numerous omnibuses running down Oxford Street deposited me -pretty near where I wanted to go; and, after alighting, I had no -difficulty in finding some one to direct me to the address I was in -search of. This proved, to my surprise, to be a small greengrocer's -shop, where one would certainly not expect that there would be any -demand for a governess. However, it was unmistakably the address that -had been given in the advertisement, so I edged my way in, past the -piles of earthy baskets by which the entrance was almost choked, and -spoke to the owner of the shop—a jolly-looking, burly, middle-aged -man.</p> - -<p>"Excuse my troubling you," said I, politely, "but I've called in -consequence of an advertisement for a daily governess by A. G. in -yesterday's <cite>Morning Post</cite>. Is this the right place?" And as I spoke -it flashed across my mind whether perhaps the initials in the -advertisement represented the words "a greengrocer."</p> - -<p>As soon as the man heard the object of my visit, his face twinkled -with amusement in a way that seemed to imply there must be some -capital joke connected with the affair. "Oh yes, Miss," he answered, -"this be the right place, sure enough! P'raps you b'ain't used to -greengrocers as rekvires daily-guvnesses vere you comes from—be you -now?"</p> - -<p>The man looked so perfectly good-tempered that it was impossible to -take offence at his enjoyment of the unknown joke, and I laughed as I -replied, "No, I can't say that we do often have that happen."</p> - -<p>"Ah, well, so I thought," he returned, chuckling. "And that just -brings us to the werry pint as 'as to be considered in this 'ere -bizness. That is—no offence my askin'—but vere <em>do</em> you come from, -Miss?"</p> - -<p>I told him the address of my lodging.</p> - -<p>"'Ealthy districk, Miss, is it?" he enquired.</p> - -<p>"Yes, as far as I know," replied I, feeling rather astonished at the -question, and reflecting that my assertion was a perfectly safe one, -seeing that I knew nothing whatever about the matter.</p> - -<p>"Any illness in the 'ouse, Miss?" he continued, holding -up his fingers and checking off on them the name of each -successive disease as he enumerated it; "any fivver, diptheery, -coleera, measles, mumps, small-pox, chicking-pox, 'oopin'-corf, -nettle-rash—that's only nine; there's a tenth as I was to ax -about, I knows; what the juice was it now? Oh yes! the one as is a -flower and a colour—yaller-rose—rose-yaller! Dashed if I can say -it right."</p> - -<p>"Is roseola the word you want?" I suggested.</p> - -<p>"<em>That's</em> it, Miss, thanky!" he exclaimed joyfully, but without -venturing on a second attempt at pronouncing the word; "now, be there -any of these 'ere as I've mentioned at the 'ouse vere you're livin'? -or any other infexshus complaint as I 'aven't mentioned, as p'raps -may be some bran new invention of the doctors since the old list was -made out?"</p> - -<p>I had never thought of making any inquiries of the kind at my -lodging, so I answered "no" boldly. Even if there were any illness, -at all events I did not know of it, so my negative was obviously not -to be considered as wilfully misleading, whatever the state of -sanitary affairs might be. "Werry good," he returned; "then if you'll -be so good as go round the corner of the street over the vay, you'll -find yourself in Fairy Avenue, and at No. 114 you'll find A. G., -that's to say, Mrs. Green. You see she's mortial afeard of what she -calls jurms, and's allers thinking as strange people's sure to have -'em in their pockets or their clothes, or some-veres about 'em, ready -to turn loose on whoever they meets. So when she adwertizes for a -guvness or a servant, she mostly axes me to let 'em come 'ere fust, -that I may make sure as they don't come from no infexshus place afore -they goes to 'er 'ouse. Did you ever 'ear of sitch a ridiklus fancy -'afore in all your born days? It makes me fit to split with larfin -sometimes. But there! it ain't but werry little trouble to me, and I -don't mind oblidgin' a good customer like 'er, as takes a sight of -wedgebuttles and fruits and sitch things. 'I considers 'em pertickler -'olesome artikles of dite,' sez she to me often. 'So do I too, mum,' -sez I back to 'er. And good reason vy I <em>should</em> inkcourage the -notion, seein' as she buys 'em all from me!"</p> - -<p>Thanking the man for his information, and feeling that I had gained -an insight into Mrs. Green's character which might come useful to me -in my dealings with her, I proceeded to 114 Fairy Avenue. On ringing -the bell and saying that I had come about the governess' situation, I -was requested to wait in the hall, whilst the servant went to see if -Mrs. Green was disengaged.</p> - -<p>It was very evident that that lady took care no one should enter her -doors without undergoing some amount of fumigation, as in the middle -of the hall there stood a sort of small brazier, wherein some kind of -disinfecting compound was smouldering, and sending out light curls of -smoke which impregnated the air with a sickly smell. By the odour of -this smoke, combined with that of carbolic acid, the whole house was -pervaded, as the floors were scrubbed with carbolic soap twice a week -regularly, and carbolic acid was freely applied to whatever incoming -thing could, by any stretch of imagination, be regarded as a possible -medium for the introduction of those "germs of disease" which Mrs. -Green held in horror. In the efficacy of any inodorous disinfectant -she had no belief at all. How, she would say, could stuff that was -not strong enough to be perceptible to the nose be strong enough to -be relied on to purify the atmosphere, and affect any germs that -might be floating about in it? Don't tell <em>her</em> to use a thing like -Cordy's fluid, that had not any smell at all! No, give her carbolic -acid or chloride of lime, which made difference enough in the air for -one's nose to take cognisance of—then there could be no mistake -about their presence, and one could feel satisfied.</p> - -<p>She did not admit in to her room till she had sent the servant back -to inquire whether I had been to the greengrocer's and been forwarded -to her by him. My answer being satisfactory, I was ushered into her -sitting-room and invited to take a seat near the door, and a good way -off from herself. We then proceeded to talk business, and I found -that she wanted a governess to come every morning to instruct and -take charge of her little girl of ten years old, and that the amount -of knowledge necessary to satisfy her demands was not beyond the -limits of my acquirements. Having discovered this much I lost no time -in asking what salary she gave, for I did not want her to anticipate -this question by asking me how much I expected to receive, as the -fact was that I had not an idea of what daily governesses were -generally paid, and feared exposing my ignorance. The terms she -offered were so far beyond what I had thought likely, that I was -delighted, and at once determined not to let slip the situation if -I could help it. Consequently I became very anxious to ingratiate -myself with her, and looked out for an opportunity of doing so by -manifesting sympathy with the dread of infection which I knew to be a -weak point of hers. For if people have any specially absurd craze, -they are sure to regard an indication of the same mania on the part -of another person as a strong recommendation and reason for thinking -well of that person. I had not long to wait for the opportunity I -desired, as she said; "There is one thing I must tell you, Miss Jill, -and that is, that I insist upon every member of my establishment, -without exception, conforming to the regulations I make in order to -guard against the introduction of infection to the house. Should you -be prepared to do this?"</p> - -<p>"Most certainly," I replied, though in truth I had no intention -of troubling my head about the matter more than I had done -heretofore—that is to say, not at all. "I shall be only too glad to -do so. For I must confess that on that point I am what some people -call quite foolishly nervous."</p> - -<p>"It is <em>impossible</em> to be too nervous about it," she returned, "and I -am glad to find that you have a proper appreciation of the necessity -of a carefulness which is a duty no less to society than to one's -self and one's family. A fresh case of illness means the setting up -of a fresh manufactory of horrible, insidious, deadly germs of -disease, which, once set going in the world, cannot be recalled, and -can only with difficulty be destroyed. How many deaths might not be -caused by germs made in and issuing from this house, if we were to -have some infectious illness here? And if the illness had been -admitted through any negligence of mine, should not I be responsible -for all of those deaths?"</p> - -<p>"Quite true," answered I, gravely. "I never was struck by that -before, but I see how unanswerably correct your reasoning is. How I -wish that every one else had an equally sensitive conscience!"</p> - -<p>"Yes, it is indeed sad," she replied, sighing, "to see what an amount -of culpable carelessness and foolhardiness exists in the world! I do -my best to make these things appear in their true light, but it is -not often that I can succeed in inspiring my own spirit of prudence -into any one else. I assure you that I have even heard of my -precautions being laughed at and called ridiculous."</p> - -<p>I kept my countenance heroically; and as she paused, as though -expecting me to make some remark, I exclaimed, "It seems hardly -credible!"</p> - -<p>"So one would have thought," she returned sadly, "and especially in -the face of the outbreak of scarlet fever which has recently occurred -in so many parts of London, and which every one must have read of in -the papers. However, to return to business. Will you kindly let me -have the address of your last situation? Should the answer to my -inquiries there prove satisfactory, I shall be glad to engage you, -as, from what I have seen of you, I have every reason to think you -will suit me."</p> - -<p>Now, of course, I had foreseen that no one would be likely to engage -me without knowing (or supposing themselves to know, which would come -to the same thing) something about who I was, and I foresaw also that -it might be against me not to be able to give the name of any one who -could be inquired of about me, either personally or by letter. To -meet this difficulty I had concocted a story which would, I hoped, be -accepted as a sufficient explanation of the matter. But I had never -dreamt of any one's being so absurdly afraid of infection as Mrs. -Green was; and the discovery of her foible inspired me with the -brilliant idea of offering her a personal reference which she would -be certain not to avail herself of.</p> - -<p>I replied, therefore, that as I had been a little out of sorts I had -been living quietly at home for the last six months, in order to -regain my health, and that I had been previously teaching in the -family of Mr. Thomson—mentioning the name of a clergyman in the east -of London whose parish I remembered having read about not long before -in a newspaper as being pretty nearly decimated by scarlet fever. -This gentleman, I said, had been most kind to me, having not only -given me a written testimonial to character, but also promised that -he would at any time write to, or see, any person on my behalf. I -only hoped, I put in parenthetically, that he was not overworking -himself in the terrible visitation of scarlet fever that had lately -come upon his parish; but he was such an excellent man, and so -indefatigable in his labours amongst the poor, that I feared it was -but too likely he would sacrifice himself to them. If anything should -happen to him I should feel I had lost one of my best friends. But, -however busy he might be, I felt sure he would keep his promise, and -would certainly find time to answer any inquiries that Mrs. Green -might wish to make about me, whether in person or by post.</p> - -<p>She, however, would as soon have thought of walking into a blazing -furnace as into Mr. Thomson's parish in its then condition, and, as -I expected, thought epistolary communication with him was but little -less perilous.</p> - -<p>"Ahem!" she answered, "I am afraid Mr. Thomson is not a very easy -person to refer to just at present, and I do not quite see how it is -to be managed. I could not <em>think</em> of going to see him, and I am -doubtful that it would be prudent to write to him either, especially -since he is so devoted to his parishioners, as you say. Men of that -kind are almost invariably careless about proper precautions. Perhaps -he would write me an answer when actually in a sick-room; and then -imagine how that letter, full of contagion, would be mixed in the -post with other letters, impart to them its fatal properties, and -thus scatter sickness and, perhaps, death far and wide! No, never -will <em>I</em> wilfully run the risk of causing disasters in this way, -whatever other people may do."</p> - -<p>"I have the testimonial he wrote me at the time I discontinued -teaching in his family, if you would think that sufficient, madam," I -replied, beginning to fumble in my pocket as though in search of the -document in question. Of course I had no such thing about me in -reality, but I knew that I could easily pretend to have forgotten it, -and then write a sham one and send it by post.</p> - -<p>She raised her hand hastily to check my producing the paper. "Wait -one moment," she cried, looking somewhat uneasy. "How long is it -since the testimonial was written?"</p> - -<p>"Just six months ago," answered I.</p> - -<p>"Was there any fever or infectious illness in the parish at that -time?" she inquired.</p> - -<p>"Not that I am aware of," I returned.</p> - -<p>"Still it might have been there without your knowledge, might it -not?" she continued.</p> - -<p>I allowed that this was not impossible, but added that I did not -believe the district to have been at all unhealthy then.</p> - -<p>"What makes me anxious for certainty about this," she said, "is, -that supposing Mr. Thomson had visited some sick person just before -writing your testimonial, he would have probably had germs of -disease clinging to him; and those germs, being communicated to the -writing-paper, would be lingering there still, and be a source of -peril to whoever comes in contact with that piece of paper. Possibly, -however, you have taken the precaution of disinfecting it by -fumigation, or in some other way?"</p> - -<p>"No, I have not," I answered; "I am ashamed to say that I did not -think of it—a most reprehensible omission on my part!"</p> - -<p>"Ah, well," she replied, with an air of indulgence, "it was an -oversight, no doubt; but then you are still very young, and one can -hardly expect young people to be as thoughtful as old ones. But we -will remedy the omission at once. There is some disinfecting powder -in that square box on the table beside you. I shall be obliged if you -will sprinkle it thoroughly over the paper before giving it me to -read."</p> - -<p>I recommenced feeling in my pocket, and then exclaimed, "Oh how very -stupid of me! I made sure that I had brought that testimonial with -me, but I must have left it on my table, as I find I have not got it -after all. Will you allow me to post it to you as soon as I get home? -Should you think it satisfactory, and write me word when you wish me -to commence my duties, I will come at whatever time you appoint."</p> - -<p>The look of relief that came over her face on hearing that I had not -got the testimonial showed me that she regarded it with considerable -distrust, and was not greatly desirous of touching it.</p> - -<p>"Yes, you can post it to me as you propose," she said; "and I will -let you know my decision by letter also. Of course you will disinfect -the paper carefully before sending it. I shall be glad if you will -take some of this powder for the purpose, as it is a disinfectant on -which I can rely thoroughly, and has so strong a smell that if you -were to forget to use it, my nose would immediately inform me of that -fact, and I should be thus warned against opening the paper. By the -by, in the event of my engaging you, should you be likely to continue -the engagement for any length of time? or to break it off again -shortly? My reason for asking is, that I am most averse to constant -changes in my establishment, because that means constant fresh risk -of infection from strangers; and therefore I prefer not entering into -an engagement with any one who likes to be perpetually moving about -from place to place."</p> - -<p>It will be remembered that my intention was merely to take a -governess's place temporarily, to eke out my means till I had learnt -hairdressing and could get a travelling-maid's situation. But I -really did not see that she had a right to expect me to confide all -my private little schemes to her, so I said nothing about this, and -only assured her that I had a horror of perpetual changes, and that -a permanent situation was exactly what I was hoping to find.</p> - -<p>"There is one thing more that I forgot to mention," she continued. -"I should object to your making use of an omnibus or train-car in -coming to give my daughter her daily lessons. I consider public -conveyances of that kind most unsafe, on account of their liability -to contain germs of disease left by some one or other of the great -variety of passengers who travel in them."</p> - -<p>"I quite agree with you," I answered, "and hardly ever go in one of -those conveyances on that account. I should hope to come here on foot -as a rule; and if the weather should make that impossible, I should -take a hansom, as being the least dangerous vehicle available."</p> - -<p>I felt I was pretty safe in making this promise, though I meant to -come by omnibus all the same. There was not much chance of her -inspecting the passengers in the numerous omnibuses running down -Oxford Street and the Bayswater Road; and they did not pass up Fairy -Avenue, so I should have no choice about walking the last part of my -journey. Thus she would see me arrive daily on foot; her mind would -be at ease; I should be perfectly free to use the convenient omnibus -as much as I chose; and so we should both be happy.</p> - -<p>Everything being settled, I took leave of her, and had reached the -door of the room to go, when she spoke again. "On the whole, Miss -Jill," she said, "I do not think I need trouble you to send me that -testimonial. From what I have seen of you, I have very little doubt -that we shall suit each other; and I feel satisfied to engage you at -once, as the peculiar circumstances of the case render it impossible -to hold any communication with the person who is your reference. Can -you begin the lessons to-morrow morning at nine o'clock?"</p> - -<p>"Certainly, madam," I replied; "you may depend upon my being here -then, and I am much obliged to you."</p> - -<p>Who would have thought that a letter six months old could have -inspired her with so much fear as to induce her to dispense with -every shadow of precaution about ascertaining the character of an -individual to whose care she was willing to commit her child?</p> - -<p>Marvelling greatly at her folly, and congratulating myself on my -success, I returned to my lodging, where I found that the little girl -of whom I had bought the flowers, had duly left them for me. It was -more than I had expected her to do, certainly; and the only way I -could account for such astonishing honesty was by supposing that no -one else had wanted to buy them, so that there had been no temptation -to her to break her promise and defraud me of my nosegay. But I -believe I judged her with too much cynicism; for, long afterwards, -she proved that she had been really grateful for the breakfast I had -given her, and was anxious to show her gratitude in deeds.</p> - -<h2 id="c10">CHAPTER X.<br /> - -<small>CHANGE OF SITUATION.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">I was naturally rather curious to know how my family would take the -discovery of my flight, and for some time afterwards I used to look -in the newspapers with a half-expectation of seeing a paragraph -headed "Mysterious disappearance of a young lady;" or else an offer -of a reward for information concerning me; or else, perhaps (but this -I considered as being merely <em>possible</em>, and not at all <em>likely</em>), an -entreaty to me to return, and all should be forgiven. As nothing of -the kind appeared, however, I perceived that my relatives had the -good sense to understand the wisdom of washing their dirty clothes at -home, and that they did not intend to draw a needless amount of -attention to the fact that I had run away from them. It was -inevitable that my having done so would be a nine day's wonder and -topic of gossip in the immediate neighbourhood of Castle Manor; but -it did not follow that our domestic want of harmony need be -proclaimed to all the world and his wife also; and so the matter -was not published in the papers.</p> - -<p>Mrs. Green's little girl Fanny, to whom I was engaged to give -instruction, was heavy and uninteresting enough to have driven -well-nigh distracted any governess who cared about shoving on her -pupils, and deriving credit from them; so it was lucky that I was -less energetic and devoted to my work. As it was for only a very -brief period that I meant to superintend Fanny's studies, it was -perfectly immaterial to me whether she progressed in them or not; -and I did not attempt to teach her anything beyond what was to be -got into her head without much trouble—which limitation reduced our -educational labours to a surprisingly small compass. Her stupidity -did not prevent us from getting on together most harmoniously; for -though I did not do much towards increasing her stock of knowledge, -yet I atoned for that deficiency by opening her mind with an amount -of general and varied entertainment with which no previous governess -had ever provided her. Sometimes I told her any marvellous stories -that I knew, adding touches, as I went on, to heighten the interest -of whatever parts seemed to astonish her especially. Or else I would -say or do something extravagantly absurd, just as gravely as though -it were the most matter-of-fact speech or action possible, and amuse -myself by watching the look of absolute bewilderment that would come -over her face at first, and speculating on how long an interval would -elapse before it would be followed by the succeeding grin which -betokened that her slowly-working brain had at last awakened to -the fact of there being a joke afoot. By such methods as these I -contrived to find amusement for both myself and her, and I have very -little doubt that she approved of me highly, and regarded me as being -far and away the pleasantest teacher she had ever had to do with.</p> - -<p>That portion of my time which was not occupied either in giving or -receiving lessons I spent chiefly in attending to the necessities of -my wardrobe, loafing about in the parks and streets, and doing -whatever sight-seeing was to be had gratuitously. I did not indulge -in any amusement costing money, except theatres, to which I allowed -myself a few visits as a treat and reward for my self-denial in -other respects—theatrical performances being a form of entertainment -to which I have always been particularly partial.</p> - -<p>Thus three or four weeks passed quickly away, and by the end of that -time I had mastered the art of hairdressing sufficiently to enable me -to undertake the duties of a lady's-maid; for I was far more -industrious in the capacity of pupil than in that of teacher, and -laboured a great deal more zealously to profit by M. Candot's -instructions than I did to make Fanny Green profit by mine. It is -wonderful how much easier it is to take trouble when one wishes to -secure value for money spent, than it is when the object of one's -exertions is merely to give an equivalent for money received!</p> - -<p>Having qualified myself for the calling I meant to adopt, the next -thing was to take steps to hear of a situation; and to that end I put -an advertisement in the <cite>Times</cite>, <cite>Morning Post</cite>, and <cite>Guardian</cite>, -offering C. J.'s services to any lady going abroad who required a -thoroughly efficient maid, capable of acting as courier if necessary. -This notice bore fruit speedily in the shape of a note addressed to -C. J., which I found awaiting me on my return from Mrs. Green's one -afternoon, and which ran as follows:—</p> - -<p class="rightalign">"2000 EATON SQUARE, <i>Thursday</i>.</p> - -<p class="letter">"Lady Mervyn writes in answer to C. J.'s advertisement, as she -wishes to meet with a good travelling-maid. Lady Mervyn will be -glad if C. J. will call at her house to-morrow evening at 5.30 -<em>punctually</em>."</p> - -<p>How strange that my notice should happen to have been seen and -answered by Lady Mervyn—a person between whom and myself there was a -remote connection, and whom I had met years ago when I was a child! -Would it be safe for me to enter her service? or should I be running -too great a risk of recognition? No, I did not think I need be -afraid. Kitty was the only one of the family who was at all likely to -remember me, as I had been much more in her company than in theirs on -the occasion of our previous meeting at Lugano. And that she had no -recollection of me I had already proved at Sparkton Station; which -forgetfulness on her part, by the by, I did not now feel the least -bit inclined to resent, having quite got over the little soreness and -irritation which it had caused me at the moment.</p> - -<p>Yes; I believed I should be as safe from discovery at Lady Mervyn's -as anywhere else, and determined that I would take the situation. I -was pleased with the idea of being under the same roof as Kitty -Mervyn, on account of the opportunities which I should then have of -observing this girl, whose character had interested me and excited -my curiosity. And then, too, I might reasonably look forward to -discovering some explanation of her having chosen to keep Captain -Edward Norroy's photograph hidden away in her purse as she had -done. A <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">carte-de-visite</i> is ordinarily stuck into an album, and -I wanted to know why she should have treated this particular <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">carte</i> -differently to that of any other acquaintance.</p> - -<p>These anticipations were checked by the sudden recollection that I -was counting my chickens before they were hatched; that I had not yet -got the place I was looking forward to; and that perhaps Lady Mervyn -might not think fit to engage me after all. When did she say I was to -go there? Looking again at the note I saw that it was dated the day -before. Yesterday was Thursday, and to-day Friday, so I must wait -upon her ladyship this very same afternoon, and had no time to lose -in providing myself with that necessary article—a character.</p> - -<p>About two months before there had died a certain Lady Brown, who was -rather a well-known person on account of her having lived much abroad -and published a large number of books containing her experiences of -the Riviera, the Dolomites, the Alps, the Rhine, and other foreign -places. Her husband, Sir Bartholomew Brown, had gone to the East -since her death, and was supposed to be wandering about somewhere in -Persia at the present moment. As, therefore, no reference was -possible to either the deceased Lady Brown or her husband, and as -they had been childless, it occurred to me that if I asserted myself -to have been her maid up to the time of her death, there was no one -to disprove the statement. Accordingly, I indited a character -purporting to be written by Sir Bartholomew, wherein it was set forth -that Caroline Jill had been for two years in his late wife's service; -had only left on account of that lady's death; had given entire -satisfaction during the whole time of her service; was a first-rate -traveller; and was a trustworthy, sober, steady, exemplary, and -in-all-ways-to-be-recommended-maid.</p> - -<p>I wasted several sheets of paper over this composition before I could -please myself; and when I had succeeded in getting it to my mind I -copied it out in a feigned hand—bold, rather scrawling, legible, and -masculine-looking. Of course there was a danger of the forgery being -detected, if Lady Mervyn should happen to be acquainted with Sir -Bartholomew's handwriting. But then it was quite likely that she was -<em>not</em>; and I would try to find out if she knew him before I produced -the character; and, even if the worst came to the worst, the chances -were that she would not take the trouble to prosecute me, and -I should have just as good a prospect as before of obtaining a -situation with some one else.</p> - -<p>By the time my preparations were completed it was later than I -thought, and as the underlining of the word "punctually" in the note -made me think it important not to be late, I started off in such a -hurry that I tumbled downstairs and bruised myself unpleasantly. -However, I did not stay to doctor my hurts then, but hurried on, and -arrived at my destination just as the Eaton Square Church clock was -striking half-past five.</p> - -<p>It then appeared that my fear of being late had been quite -uncalled-for, and that I might have spared myself the bruises which -my haste had caused me, for Lady Mervyn had not yet returned from -driving. The fact was she had followed the usual plan of fashionable -ladies and gentlemen, who, when they make an appointment with an -inferior, take care that they themselves shall not be kept waiting, -but do not the least object to inflicting that annoyance on the other -party. No doubt such people consider that the time of a servant, -tradesman, farmer, or poor person is much less valuable than their -own, and a thing of so little importance that it may be wasted at -pleasure.</p> - -<p>On stating the object of my visit, and that Lady Mervyn had directed -me to call at that time, I was told to sit down and wait till she -came in. It was past 6 o'clock when she returned, and even then she -did not send for me immediately, but delayed doing so till she had -leisurely examined the cards that had been left for her whilst she -was out, refreshed herself with a cup of tea, and written a couple of -notes. Having accomplished these things, she at last gave orders for -me to be shown into her presence.</p> - -<p>She was about middle height, slightly made, and aristocratic looking. -As she was rather short-sighted she wore a <i class="loanword">pince-nez</i>, and this she -put up, and coolly stared at me through, as soon as I entered the -room. After a prolonged survey she dropped it, but had recourse to it -again several times during the interview, always putting it up with -an air of having suddenly bethought her of some feature, limb, -or other part of me which she had hitherto omitted to study -sufficiently, and at which she wanted to have another good look. I -must say I thought that she used the <i class="loanword">pince-nez</i> in a manner which -would have been considered intolerably rude if it had been directed -at any one in her own rank of life; but then she regarded a servant -as being a different sort of animal from herself, and would have -laughed at the idea of a maid's not liking to be stared at as if she -were made of wood or stone, instead of flesh and blood.</p> - -<p>She began by inquiring my name and age; to which I replied that I was -called Caroline Jill; and that I was just twenty-two. For, though my -real age was eighteen, yet I thought that that seemed rather too -young for a person representing herself as having been a lady's-maid -for the last two years, and that therefore I had better give myself -credit for a few more years than I was actually entitled to.</p> - -<p>"Twenty-two!" she repeated; "you don't look your age. I should not -have thought you so old as that. How long were you in your last -situation? and what was the cause of your leaving?"</p> - -<p>"I was there two years, and I only left on account of the lady's -death," I replied. "Did your ladyship know the late Lady Brown?"</p> - -<p>She shook her head.</p> - -<p>"Perhaps your ladyship may have heard of her," I continued; "she -was the wife of Sir Bartholomew Brown, and used to write books -sometimes?"</p> - -<p>"Oh yes; I did not know her, but I know who you mean now," answered -Lady Mervyn; "was hers your last place?"</p> - -<p>"Yes," I replied, feeling that the ground was safe, and that I might -produce my false testimonial. "Ever since her death, two months ago, -Sir Bartholomew has been away from England; but, before going, he -kindly gave me a character, for fear of my having any difficulty -about getting another situation through there being no one from my -last place for me to refer to. Here is what he wrote. He was good -enough to tell me, when last I saw him, that he considered me to be -the best maid his wife had ever had to travel with, and that I did -just as well as a courier."</p> - -<p>So saying I handed over my forgery to Lady Mervyn, who perused it -carefully, and then returned it to me.</p> - -<p>"I always prefer a personal reference if possible," she said; -"but perhaps I might consent to dispense with it for once, in an -exceptional case like this, where it evidently cannot be had. -Certainly Sir Bartholomew speaks of you in very high terms. I do not -want you for myself, but for one of my daughters, who is going abroad -with my sister, Mrs. Rollin. You would have to attend partly on Mrs. -Rollin also; but she will not want much done for her, as she does not -care about a maid's assistance in most things. As they do not intend -taking a courier, they must have a really efficient travelling-maid, -who can see to their luggage, take tickets, and all that sort of -thing. I suppose you have had plenty of experience in that way with -Lady Brown? Can you talk French and German pretty easily?"</p> - -<p>I replied in the affirmative, that I also knew Italian, Spanish, a -little Dutch, and a few words of Greek, and that I could keep -accounts in some foreign coins.</p> - -<p>"<span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">En verité, vous ne vous vantez pas mal!</span>" she returned, looking -insultingly sceptical as to my accomplishments being as extensive as -I claimed them to be. "<span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Voyons d'abord pour le français.</span>" And she then -continued the conversation in French, whilst I replied in the same -tongue. The question of wages was propounded next. I had no intention -of depreciating my value by demanding too little for my services, and -I knew that courier-maids were always paid very high, so I said that -I should not like to take less than what I had received from Lady -Brown, which was £35 and all found. That was very high Lady Mervyn -said; still, she would not object to give it to a maid who was really -worth it. After a few more questions she observed that my French was -satisfactory, at all events; and that, as she was not herself a very -good German scholar, she would get her eldest daughter to test my -proficiency in that line. Ringing the bell she told the footman, who -answered it, to request Miss Mervyn to come to her. When that young -lady arrived her mother desired her to find out how I talked German. -As I came triumphantly out of her examination, and also translated -accurately an Italian quotation which happened to be in one of the -newspapers lying on the table, Lady Mervyn's incredulity as to my -accomplishments evidently diminished. I could see that she began to -think my pretensions to knowledge were better founded than she had at -first supposed them to be, and that she was now inclined to take upon -trust the skill in foreign moneys, and in Spanish, Dutch, and Greek, -to which I laid claim.</p> - -<p>She hesitated, considered and reconsidered, and scrutinised me -through the <i class="loanword">pince-nez</i> for some time before she could make up her -mind whether to engage me or not, and finally decided to do so. Mrs. -Rollin and Miss Mervyn were going abroad in another ten days, she -said, and as it would be well for them and me to have a few days at -home in which to get used to one another before starting on our -travels, she wished me to return to her house and begin my engagement -on that day week. This I was quite ready to do, as I had no doubt of -quickly getting free from Mrs. Green whenever I chose.</p> - -<p>One thing which I had evolved during the conversation with Lady -Mervyn was a grievous disappointment to me; and that was, that I was -not—at all events for a while—to become a member of her own -establishment. I had been confidently reckoning on being brought near -Kitty; but it appeared that this was not to be my destiny after all, -unless, by some piece of luck, she should chance to be the daughter -who was to accompany Mrs. Rollin, and whose especial attendant I was -to be. My mind was set at rest on this point before I left Lady -Mervyn's room, for, just as I was about to depart, she exclaimed, -"Wait a moment! I forgot that the young lady whom you will wait on -may like to see you if she is at home. Perhaps, however, she is not, -as she was to dine out early to-night before going to the theatre. -Has Kitty started yet, do you know?" she continued, turning to the -daughter who had been experimenting on my German.</p> - -<p>"Yes," was the answer; "she went ten minutes ago, just before I came -to you."</p> - -<p>"Ah, never mind then, Jill; you can go now," returned Lady Mervyn. -Whereupon I took myself off, mightly pleased at having discovered -that the Miss Mervyn whom I was to serve was just the one whom I -wanted it to be.</p> - -<p>The next thing was to terminate my engagement with Mrs. Green, and -I meant to make her do this herself. For this purpose I informed her -next morning that I was sorry to say that I found the daily walk to -her house was more than I could manage, therefore I must ask her to -permit me to come by omnibus in future.</p> - -<p>She replied (as I had felt very sure she would do) that she could not -on any account consent to expose herself and her household to such a -risk of infection. Could I not change my residence, and come to live -nearer her house? I answered that I did not wish to do that, as I -was quite comfortable in my lodging, and should probably have a -difficulty in finding another to suit me equally well.</p> - -<p>She returned that it was most annoying, and that in that case there -was no choice but to conclude our connection together. That would -necessitate her looking out for another governess, which she greatly -disliked doing because there was always <em>some</em> danger of infection -from strangers coming to the premises, notwithstanding all the -precautions she could take. She would never have engaged me if she -had thought there was a chance of the engagement lasting so short a -time; but I had seemed so anxious for a permanent place that she -thought I was as averse to constant changes as she was herself. -However, there was no help for it if I declined to change my abode, -for it was out of the question for her to allow any one coming daily -to her house to make use of an omnibus.</p> - -<p>Poor woman! I think she would have had a fit if she had known that -I had done that very thing day after day since I had been teaching -her child; and she was certainly an excellent illustration of the -truth of the old proverb, "Where ignorance is bliss 'tis folly to -be wise." Yet I don't think she was very singular in this after -all. How many of us are there—especially of those who are heads of -houses—whose peace of mind might not be considerably disturbed if -we did but know the extent to which other people are in the habit of -setting at naught and ignoring some particular pet prejudice of our -own?</p> - -<p>It amused me to affect deep sympathy with a piece of folly which I -was laughing at in my sleeve all the time; so I replied that I fully -recognised the truth of what she said, and that I was truly grieved -to be the means of exposing her to fresh peril from germs of disease -clinging to the clothes of applicants for my situation; but that -since <em>she</em> objected to my coming by a 'bus, and <em>I</em> objected to -leave my present lodging, there was unfortunately no option about my -ceasing to instruct Fanny.</p> - -<p>She sighed, and answered that she was afraid that was true. At the -same time, she could not in justice omit to say that she considered -me to have behaved very well in at once telling her honestly of my -inability to continue to attend to my duties without travelling by -that dangerous conveyance which she had expressly prohibited me from -using. She feared there were some people who would have been less -straightforward, and who would, in such a case, have slily disobeyed -her, and endeavoured to conceal from her what they were doing. But -then no one was likely to be guilty of such unprincipled conduct as -that whose views were as sound as she knew mine to be on the subject -of infection! Could I go on coming to her house as before for a few -days longer? If so she would be very glad, as, perhaps, by then she -might be able to hear of a successor for me. But if the walk was too -far for me to manage, why, of course, the engagement must come to an -end at once, as she could not consent to my coming by omnibus for -even one single day.</p> - -<p>To this I made answer, with perfect truth, that I should be most -happy to go on coming in the same way as I had hitherto done till the -following Thursday. After that, however, I could undertake it no -longer, and supposed, therefore, that she would wish our engagement -to conclude then.</p> - -<p>She assented to this, and we parted on the best of terms with one -another.</p> - -<p>Perhaps it may be thought odd that I did not pursue the ordinary -method of simply giving notice, and taking myself off, when I wanted -to go to another situation. Of course I could easily have done so if -I had liked; but in that case I should have lost all the fun that I -got out of the matter by the other plan. It amused me to make her act -as I chose, and herself dismiss me when I wished her to do so; and I -enjoyed feeling that her weak point rendered her in my hands an -unsuspecting puppet, that would kick or not, according to how I chose -to pull the strings. Be it remembered that love of fun has always -been a much stronger element in my character than amiability.</p> - -<h2 id="c11">CHAPTER XI.<br /> - -<small>AN UNWELCOME ADMIRER.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">So now I was going to be a lady's-maid. I knew that the customs, -ideas, traditions, and general mode of thought prevailing in the -rank of life I was about to enter, would be likely to differ in many -ways from those to which I had hitherto been accustomed; and this -knowledge naturally made me rather anxious as to how easy I might -find it to adapt myself to my novel position, and to the people with -whom I should have to associate. I felt that I was on the brink of a -completely new experience, and looked forward with more trepidation -than I had expected to my initiation therein on joining Lord Mervyn's -household as a servant. Under these circumstances I laid down two -rules for my guidance, to which I determined to adhere as far as -possible: these were—first, carefully to avoid making enemies -amongst my fellow-domestics; and secondly, to try and discover and -conform to whatever unwritten laws of etiquette might be generally -established amongst them. And in accordance with the second of these -rules, I determined that on the day when I was due at 2000 Eaton -Square, I would not make my appearance there till towards supper -time; for I had often noticed at home that whenever a new servant -was coming, he or she was sure not to turn up till as late in the day -as possible; and from this I inferred that to arrive early at a new -place was probably not considered the right thing.</p> - -<p>It was, therefore, quite late in the evening when I drove up to Lord -Mervyn's door. The various articles I had had to purchase in order to -equip myself properly, had caused my possessions to outgrow the -modest little bag that had sufficed to contain them when I came to -London a few weeks before; and so I was now accompanied by a box -large enough to make a respectable show as it stood on the roof of -the cab which brought me.</p> - -<p>That cab, by the by, is always a sore recollection to me, for I -cannot forget that it was the means, indirectly, of my vanity -receiving a sharp blow. The way of it was this.</p> - -<p>As I knew that Lady Mervyn would defray my expenses in getting to her -house, of course I did not hesitate about coming in a cab; and of -course also, in charging the fare to her, I put it down as being just -double what I had really paid. When she came to settle her accounts -with me she demurred to this item, saying that the charge was far -beyond what it ought to have been for the distance from my lodging to -Eaton Square. I replied innocently that I had thought it seemed a -good deal, and had said so to the cabman at the time; but that as he -had declared it was not a penny more than he was entitled to, and as -I had supposed he must know the proper fare better than I did, I had -given him what he asked.</p> - -<p>Lady Mervyn accepted the explanation as satisfactory, and passed on -to the next item without further question. But, when paying me, she -remarked contemptuously that I must be uncommonly silly to let myself -be cheated so easily, and that in future she advised me to remember -that the word of a London cabman was not <em>always</em> to be relied on -implicitly.</p> - -<p>As if <em>I</em> needed any advice of that kind! Was it possible to hear -myself credited with such folly, and yet not refute the insulting -accusation instantly? <em>I</em> to be considered such a greenhorn—<em>I</em> who -prided myself on being anything but soft and easy to take in!</p> - -<p>Stung to the quick by her scornful words, my self-esteem would hardly -consent to submit to the affront in silence. It urged me to remind -her of the fact that there could, in any case, be no question of my -having let <em>myself</em> be cheated, since it was not <em>I</em> who was the -person by whom the fare was eventually to be paid. But such a retort, -though gratifying to my injured feelings, would have evidently been -to the last degree unbecoming to my position as lady's-maid. Luckily -my sense of this sufficed to keep me from answering her as I longed -to do, and I managed to listen humbly to the unmerited reproach of -gullibility, just as though I acquiesced in the justice of it. But it -was only by a desperate effort that I could thus control myself, for -I was wounded in a point where I was peculiarly sensitive. The -thought of the slur that had been cast on my knowledge of the world -and hard-headedness rankled in my breast for long afterwards, -irritating me to such an extent that I could not help feeling that my -dishonesty in overcharging Lady Mervyn was punished after all, and -that I had only come off second best in the affair. For the amount of -pecuniary profit I gained by it was absolutely insignificant, and -certainly inadequate to counterbalance the mortification which it -entailed upon my pride.</p> - -<p>The thought of this annoyance has led me away from the proper course -of my narrative. I apologise for the digression, and return to the -evening when I and my chattels were deposited by the cab at 2000 -Eaton Square.</p> - -<p>The dignity of the post I was to fill exonerated me from having to -join the common herd who supped in the servants' hall, and gave me -standing in the higher and more select society occupying the -housekeeper's room. Here we fared most sumptuously, for Lady Mervyn -had had a small dinner-party that night, and on these occasions it -was customary for the servants to finish up the relics of the feast -if they cared to do so. Bearing this in mind, the cook never omitted -to make the dishes of a liberal size, or to concoct a sufficient -amount of whatever sauce was required for the various <i class="loanword">entrées</i>, -puddings, etc., to be able to keep back some of it when they were -sent up to the dining-room. By this means it was easy afterwards to -renovate most of them for downstairs use, even though the sauce might -have been popular with the gentry, and wholly consumed upstairs—at -least, as much of it as ever went there. Our meal, therefore, was -little inferior to, and almost identical with, that which had been -set before the guests overhead. It terminated with some capital -ice-pudding and dessert ices, of which there was an ample supply, in -well frozen condition;—this was thanks to the care of the butler, -who had helped the ladies and gentlemen with a very sparing hand, -and then at once sent the remainder to be preserved for us in the -refrigerator.</p> - -<p>My companions seemed so well inclined to be civil and to welcome me -amongst them, that I began to shake off my nervousness, and to think -that I was going to get on swimmingly. It was evidently considered -that in the presence of a newcomer like me, the first appropriate -topic of conversation to bring forward was the character of our -employers; and as every one in the room delivered his or her opinion -on the subject with perfect freedom, I soon picked up a good deal of -highly interesting information.</p> - -<p>Lady Mervyn was described as being "reg'lar out and out worldly, a -good bit more of a Turk than you would think from the quiet looks of -her; a bit mean, too, and one of those ladies who go poking their -noses into a larder to see what's there pretty near every morning." -I could see that the cook considered the last mentioned custom to be -highly objectionable, and an amount of <i class="loanword">surveillance</i> which was both -uncalled for and aggravating.</p> - -<p>The verdict on the eldest daughter was that she was "not much to look -at, and a bit of a screw, but better tempered than Lady M."</p> - -<p>The most popular member of the family was evidently Kitty, who was -pronounced to be "'andsome, merry, spirity, and pleasant-spoken to -both 'igh and low. For all that, though, you can see that she'll -never be satisfied without being first fiddle, or pretty near it, -wherever she is, and that in 'er 'art she likes 'igh folk and swells -better than them as isn't. She don't show 'er pride on the outside, -p'raps, so much as some do; but it's there all the same, and you -won't often find an 'ortier young lady, go where you will. She's 'er -ma's favourite, she is, and bound to marry a top-sawyer some -day—she'd never be 'appy with any one as wasn't."</p> - -<p>I took the opportunity of enquiring whether there was supposed to be -any particular individual in the wind, and I half expected that in -the answer I should hear something about Captain Norroy. This, -however, was not the case, nor was his name ever once mentioned -during the whole conversation. I evolved that she had plenty of -admirers, and was very gracious to them all, just as she was to every -one else; but that whenever any of them had been cheated by her -amiable manner into the belief that he had a chance of becoming her -husband, he had speedily been undeceived, and learnt, to his cost, -that her readiness to be great friends with him was no indication of -a disposition to be anything more. The most desirable of her many -admirers was, in the opinion of my informants, a certain Lord -Clement, who was clearly at her disposal if she chose to have him, -but whose affection she showed no signs of reciprocating.</p> - -<p>Her obduracy in this matter was quite inexplicable, I was told, he -being a rich young earl not more than eight years her senior, of good -family and irreproachable character, an excellent match in every -respect, and whose wife's rank and position would be high enough to -content any reasonable woman. There was no doubt that <em>her</em> family -approved cordially of his suit, and that <em>his</em> relations, also, had -no objection to it. One would have thought that any girl would have -been glad to get such a husband, and more particularly a girl like -her who set store on being a nob. Yet, for some reason or other, she -seemed not to know he had any attractions at all to offer, and turned -up her nose at him as if she didn't care a straw about such things. -Not that she was what you could call uncivil to him,—oh no, it was -not her nature to be that to any one,—but she certainly contrived to -give him more cold shoulder than encouragement. Whether or not he had -ever ventured to declare himself to her, in spite of this, was a -matter as to which opinions varied. The housekeeper did not believe -he <em>had</em> proposed; whereas the butler took a contrary view in -consequence of what he had heard from a waiter friend of his who had -had opportunities of observing his lordship and Miss Kitty together -at several parties. But it was mere conjecture, and every one agreed -that there was no certainty about the matter either one way or other.</p> - -<p>It can easily be imagined that gossip of this kind was extremely -interesting to a person in my position, anxious to learn all I could -regarding the lay of the land which I had come to inhabit. The -communicativeness of my new associates, and the facility with which I -was getting on with them at starting, reassured me greatly. I began -to wonder at my former qualms, lest in descending to a lower social -grade I should find things to put up with that were distasteful and -unpleasant. Entering service was, after all, no such formidable -ordeal as I had imagined; there was nothing that I should not quickly -grow accustomed to in my unfamiliar surroundings; nothing to shock -the prejudices or fastidiousness of any reasonable person; no reason -whatever why I should not be able to fraternise, and make myself at -home, just as well in that class of life as in any other. Alas for -these <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">couleur de rose</i> anticipations of mine! They were destined to -be of but very brief duration, and were soon ruthlessly destroyed by -the following most vexatious occurrence.</p> - -<p>As there is no accounting for tastes, and as even the ugliest of -women need not despair of meeting with some man in whose eyes she -will appear beautiful, or nice-looking at the very least, therefore -I might obviously have foreseen the possibility of my encountering -some male fellow-servant or other who would consider me sufficiently -attractive to flirt with. Of course, I ought to have taken this into -my calculations when I was contemplating the various chances and -events to which I should be liable on entering service. But it was a -contingency which, somehow or other, never once occurred to me; I -suppose I was too destitute of vanity about my own charms to think -of it.</p> - -<p>Now amongst my new companions was Lord Mervyn's valet, Perkins, a -pale-faced, sandy-haired, thick-lipped, abominably-scented man, -who wore flowing whiskers of inordinate length which he greatly -cherished; who believed himself to be universally acceptable to the -weaker sex, and who was conceited, cowardly, and revengeful. As bad -luck would have it, I happened to take his fancy at first sight; and -it all of a sudden dawned upon me, to my amazement and dismay, that -he was actually making me the object of very marked and unmistakable -attentions.</p> - -<p>Scandalised at the notion of a man-servant taking the liberty to -raise his eyes to a lady, I could hardly trust to the evidence of my -own senses at first. But then the matter seemed less unlikely when I -remembered that he had not a suspicion of there being any inequality -of rank between him and me, and that, as far as that went, I was in -his eyes just the same as any other maid in the house.</p> - -<p>What he should find to admire in me, who had certainly done nothing -to attract him, was beyond my power to imagine; but that did not -alter the very unpleasant fact that he <em>did</em> regard me with favour, -for he made it too plain for there to be a doubt about the matter. I -shuddered to think that I must endure being made love to by a valet: -it was an odious and degrading idea. Had I realised the possibility -of it beforehand, I hardly knew whether I should ever have placed -myself where I should be exposed to the risk of anything so -disagreeable. Disgusted and angry at the admiration which I deemed an -insult, and was yet powerless to resent, I endeavoured to nip it in -the bud by energetic snubbing. Alas! he only thought that I was -affecting coyness in order to draw him on, and persisted in his -objectionable attentions all the more.</p> - -<p>To add to my annoyance, I perceived that I was meanwhile incurring -the bitter enmity of Lady Mervyn's maid, Robinson, to whom Perkins -had, before my coming, devoted himself chiefly, and who strongly -objected to any transfer of his affections. Too much blinded by -jealousy to see how unwelcome his vulgar compliments were to me, she -attributed the fickle conduct of her swain entirely to my wiles, and -thought that I alone was to blame for his deserting her.</p> - -<p>Unluckily the man had a smattering of French, and though his accent -was as bad as a Corsican's (which is saying a <em>great</em> deal), he was -immensely proud of his acquirements as a linguist, and aired them on -every possible opportunity. Knowing that I, too, was supposed to be -accomplished in this line, he kept on addressing me in the one -foreign tongue which he believed himself to know, whenever he could -recollect enough of it to translate any remark that he wanted to -make. By this proceeding the flames of Robinson's wrath were -constantly being fanned higher and higher; for she—understanding -not a word of any language except her own—jumped to the conclusion -that whatever French observation he addressed to me must necessarily -be something of an extra-tender description, which would be unsuited -to the ears of the general public.</p> - -<p>I—anxious not to quarrel with her, and recoiling with horror from -the idea that any one could possibly suspect me of having the -faintest approach to a private understanding with Perkins—invariably -answered his speeches in English. But my efforts to undeceive her -were in vain, and by the time we retired to bed she had begun to -express her hostility in various unmistakable ways—such as darting -angry glances in my direction, giving vent to frequent sniffs -betokening great mental irritation, and making half-audible -observations as to the rudeness of talking secrets in company, and -the intense objection she had to meddlesome strangers who intruded -and made mischief amongst friends.</p> - -<p>A nice kettle of fish this is! thought I, in reviewing the events of -the day before I went to sleep. I certainly do not see how I am to -keep to my intention of not making enemies at this rate. And just -when I was beginning to feel sure that everything was going to be so -comfortable, too! Why could not that wretch Perkins have let me -alone, I wonder? Faugh! The idea of supposing that I could be pleased -with what <em>he</em> considers pretty speeches. I think it's a great pity -that there are any men at all in the world,—or, anyhow, any except -gentlemen.</p> - -<p>There was something worse than mere pretty speeches in store for me. -On the day after my arrival I was going upstairs from dinner when I -suddenly saw Perkins coming towards me. No one else was in sight, and -he evidently thought it a good opportunity for prosecuting his -courtship vigorously.</p> - -<p>"Miss Jill, my dear," whispered he, leering at me detestably; "I'm -<em>dying</em> for a kiss from them sweet lips of yours. Do give me one -now—there's no one to see."</p> - -<p>I was too much taken aback to be able to think of any answer which -would adequately express the intense horror and indignation with -which his insolent speech inspired me, so I pretended not to have -heard what he said. But I suspect that my face showed something of -what I felt, for he was not deceived by my affectation of deafness, -and continued, with a conceited snigger, whilst he stroked his -beloved whiskers complacently:</p> - -<p>"What—not just yet, my little partridge! <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Tray biang!</i> This evening, -or to-morrow, then, eh? Only I reelly <em>can't</em> wait long, mind; and if -you go on being 'ard-'arted, I shall take that kiss without asking -leave. That's just what you want, I dessay. Bless you! <em>I</em> know the -way to please the ladies. You're all the same—longing to be courted -and kissed, and yet making believe that you can't abide nothing of -the kind, all the time."</p> - -<p>I reached my room in a state of fury that was mixed with alarm, lest -he should attempt to execute his threat. Being stronger than me, -there was a chance that he might succeed in spite of all I could do -to prevent it. And since it made me frantic merely to <em>think</em> of such -a humiliation, what should I do supposing the monster actually did -manage to profane my face with his lips? Should I kill him on the -spot, or should I expire from sheer disgust? How unutterably horrible -it was to have to associate with a creature who had such coarse, -boorish ideas of what was the proper way for a man to make himself -agreeable to a woman! This, verily, was a degradation for which I had -not bargained. It was a comfort that I was going abroad so soon; if I -could escape for a few days more, I should be out of reach of the -danger. And with this reflection I consoled myself as well as I -could, determining to be constantly on my guard as long as I was in -that house, lest the dreaded and hateful salute should come upon me -unawares, from some obscure corner or lurking-place.</p> - -<p>My apprehensions were but too well-founded, as I experienced on the -following evening. It was after dark, and I was proceeding along the -passage near the pantry, with a lighted candle in my hand, when my -enemy suddenly sprung out from some recess where he had been lying in -ambush. He endeavoured to throw his arms around me, exclaiming, as he -did so: "Now's our time, my pet! I can't <em>possibly</em> wait no longer; -and no one's looking, so you needn't purtend not to like it."</p> - -<p>Moved by rage and fright to defend myself at all hazards, I had -recourse to the only weapon available; and against the odious face -and lips that were approaching mine I thrust the candle that I -carried. He tried to avoid the impending peril by blowing out the -light; but either he was too much confused, or else I was too quick -for him, and he failed to extinguish it. In another instant there was -a strong smell of burning hair, and one of his cherished whiskers was -on fire. He let go of me with an oath, and an exclamation of pain -and fear—for he was a shocking coward; and I passed on, quivering -with excitement, and divided between exultation at my escape and -self-hatred for having subjected myself to the disgrace of being thus -forced into a sort of romping struggle with a valet.</p> - -<p>When next I saw him he bore considerable traces of the contest. The -hairy appendages to his face, in which he delighted, were gone; for -the whisker I had set on fire had been so much destroyed that it had -had to be shaved off, and then of course its companion had been -obliged to follow suit. And besides this, there were on his lips and -cheek sundry inflamed and angry-looking burns and blisters, which I -regarded with vindictive satisfaction.</p> - -<p>When the other servants commented on the change in his appearance, -and inquired into the cause thereof, he accounted for it by a -story—which I did not trouble myself to contradict—about his having -had an accident with an unusually explosive match, the head of which -had flown off and burnt him. There was nothing so abominably -dangerous, he said, with savage emphasis, as an ill-made thing like -that, going off all of a sudden, and flaring and skipping about like -mad, when it looked as safe and quiet as possible. Regular man traps, -he considered them to be and if he could have his way, they should be -burnt, or got rid of somehow, every one of them.</p> - -<p>As he spoke he cast a malignant glance at me, which convinced me that -I had incurred his undying resentment, and that in his abuse of the -imaginary match he was conveying his opinion about my deserts.</p> - -<p>To that, however, I was indifferent; for in my eyes his hatred was -infinitely preferable to his love; I did not at all suppose he could -do me any harm, and only rejoiced to find what a wholesome effect my -violence had produced. He could by no means forgive the loss of his -whiskers and disfigurement which I had indicted on him; and after the -encounter above recorded he took no notice of me, except when he -thought he saw an opening for saying or doing anything likely to -annoy me—of which he always availed himself.</p> - -<p>Some of the ways by which he tried to show his spite were highly -ludicrous, and all the more so because they failed completely of -having the effect he desired. For instance, in helping the vegetables -he would omit to supply my wants in the proper order of precedence -belonging to my position, and would serve some inferior domestic with -potatoes before me. This, as I subsequently learnt, was intended as a -mortal offence, which ought to have wounded my feelings desperately. -But I was happily ignorant of it at the time, and had no suspicion of -the intended insult. As long as I had enough potatoes, it was all the -same to me whether I had them first or last; and when at dinner, he -passed over me, and handed the dish to the second housemaid before -me, I was all unconscious of the affront that was being offered, so -that my peace of mind was in no wise affected by it.</p> - -<p>But though, since he had given up making love to me, I was impervious -to most of his methods of annoyance, none the less did I find the -prevailing state of things uncomfortable in 2000 Eaton Square; and it -was with sincere joy that I found myself at last fairly off from -London, and accompanying Mrs. Rollin and Kitty to the Continent. I -hoped that I had seen the last of Perkins; or that, at all events, if -he and I should be destined to inhabit the same house again when I -returned from abroad, he would have got over his present bad temper -sufficiently to keep the peace with me. Certainly I never suspected -the implacable enmity of which—as I was to find by experience—he -was capable.</p> - -<h2 id="c12">CHAPTER XII.<br /> - -<small>THE PHOTOGRAPH AGAIN.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">When fingers are set to work for the first time at dressing and -undressing any one else than their natural owner, they are apt to -feel uncommonly as if they were all thumbs; such, at least, was the -conclusion I came to at the outset of my career as lady's-maid. But -a very little practice sufficed to make the awkward sensation wear -off; and, after that, I was able easily to fulfil the duties of my -post. To these duties I had no dislike, and much preferred being -engaged in performing them to spending my time amongst other -domestics; for I could wait on two ladies without shocking my -self-respect in any way, whereas I felt ashamed and degraded at the -mere idea of being liable to be persecuted by a man like Perkins. I -tried hard to conquer this squeamishness, telling myself that it was -ridiculous and inconsistent for a woman like me to be so particular, -after having deliberately elected to knock about in the world, and -take what came. But my endeavours to reason myself into a sensible -view of the matter were in vain, and completely failed to uproot the -feeling that to be taken liberties with by a man-servant was a -humiliation not to be endured.</p> - -<p>The Perkins incident having put me out of charity with the whole -class—females and males alike—to which he belonged, it was a -satisfaction to me that I was to be the sole attendant accompanying -Mrs. Rollin and Kitty Mervyn abroad. This obviated all danger, at all -events for the present, of my having to associate with obnoxious -comrades. On the score of being dull for want of company I felt no -uneasiness, for I knew by experience that I could amuse myself -perfectly well when left to my own devices. Besides—had I not now -the opportunity which I had desired for observing Kitty Mervyn, -and trying to make out her character? I habitually regarded every -one with indifference; but she had for me a strange fascination, -which was strong enough to overcome that indifference, and I was -quite astonished at the extent to which she interested me. Let me -enumerate some of the attractions and qualities, both bodily and -mental, of this young lady, who was at once my mistress, and -also—though she would have been very greatly surprised to be told -so—my connection.</p> - -<p>In appearance she was tall, handsome, and imperial-looking, with a -bright and open expression of countenance. Her disposition was -upright, proud, honourable, and averse to everything mean. In -conversation she was clever, quick-witted, lively, and pleasant. And -as, furthermore, she was endowed with great social talent and a -remarkable knack of pleasing all with whom she came in contact, she -won hearts right and left, and was considered charming wherever she -went. She was, however, far from faultless. The germ of worldliness, -which inevitably creeps into an education amongst fashionable people, -had begun to develop itself, and to taint her nature; and the -conclave in her father's housekeeper's room had certainly not -erred in attributing to her pride and ambition. So marked was her -inclination to haughtiness that, when first I knew her, it sometimes -puzzled me why she should take the trouble she did to make herself -universally agreeable—even to people for whom she did not care, -from whom there was nothing to be gained in return, and who were -nobodies in her estimation. As, however, I came to understand her -better, I discovered the key to this enigma, and perceived that she -was actuated—whether consciously or only instinctively I do not -know—by a strong desire for two things which seemed almost as -indispensable to her as the air she breathed. These two things were -popularity and power, and without them she was never really happy.</p> - -<p>Her frank genial manner was well adapted to make people believe her -to be an unreserved, easily-read individual; but the more attentively -I studied her, the less inclined did I feel to think that impression -a correct one. I had doubts whether she ever showed much of her real -self; whether there were not recesses, of unsuspected depth, hidden -within her where no mortal eye could penetrate; and whether she did -not often make use of unreserve as a mask to conceal its opposite. -The possibility of this made her all the more attractive to me. -Curiosity as to what might lie beneath the surface she presented to -the world, served to increase the drawing towards her that I had -always felt; and had I been so placed as to have a chance of making -friends with her, I should certainly have tried to do so. But it was, -as I well knew, hopeless to attempt such a thing in my present -position; for she was not the sort of girl to condescend to familiar -intercourse with social inferiors, and in her eyes I was simply a -maid. Under the circumstances, it would obviously be ridiculous if I -were to let myself become fond of her, and I resolved firmly not to -be guilty of any sentimental folly of the kind. Yet, in spite of this -prudent resolution, I must confess that I sometimes had hard work not -to yield to the indefinable charm which she had for me; and had she -vouchsafed me any special marks of favour, I am afraid I should -inevitably have made a fool of myself, and become romantically -devoted to her. As, however, I had no particular attraction for her, -such as she had for me, that fact contributed greatly to restrain my -liking within reasonable limits. To indulge in an unrequited -attachment had always seemed to me decidedly weak and contemptible -(notwithstanding that such a man as the author of the <cite lang="it" xml:lang="it">Vita Nuova</cite> -had done it); and it would have discomposed me immensely to detect -in myself any symptoms of being capable of that weakness.</p> - -<p>In short, I was sufficiently smitten with Kitty to have cast prudence -to the winds, and let my whole heart go out to her, <em>if</em> she had held -up her finger to me. But that little word "if" made just all the -difference. My sense of dignity might safely be reckoned on to assist -reason and prudence in fighting against an infatuation for any person -who did not care for me in return.</p> - -<p>From London we proceeded to Paris; thence we travelled slowly across -France, stopping at various places of interest, and presently reached -Cannes, where my two ladies meant to make a stay of a week or so -before journeying on into Italy.</p> - -<p>So far, I had seen and heard nothing to confirm the gossip about Lord -Clement's admiration for Kitty, which had been communicated to me by -the servants. But I received ample proof of its truth on the day -after our arrival at Cannes, and this happened in the following -manner:—</p> - -<p>I was engaged in brushing the dust off a dress which Kitty had been -wearing, when I found in the pocket a letter which she had received -that morning from England. I did not hesitate to read it. When -letters have secrets in them, people do not leave them about, thought -I; so, since Kitty has not troubled to take this one out of her -pocket, of course there are no private matters in it, and there is no -reason why I should not see if the contents are amusing.</p> - -<p>The epistle was from Lady Mervyn, and the portion of it which most -interested me ran thus:</p> - -<p>"Lord Clement told me last week that he thought he should go yachting -to the Riviera at once, and as I have little doubt what is the -attraction that takes him there, I daresay you will see something of -him before long. I do hope, dearest Kitty, that you will not set -yourself against him, and that you will try and reconsider the answer -you gave him before. I am, as you know, the <em>last</em> person to try to -over-persuade you into a marriage against your own inclinations; but -yet I cannot resist putting in a good word for him, for it touches -me to see how truly he loves you, and how constant to you he is, -in spite of your refusal. Besides that, he really is a man in a -thousand, and one to whom any mother would trust her daughter -joyfully. Not only has he the recommendations of rank and wealth, but -moreover he is unusually amiable, high-minded, conscientious, steady, -and superior to the temptations to folly and extravagance to which -young men in his position are so peculiarly open. With the exception -of yourself, I doubt there being a single girl in London—or in -England either—who would not accept him gladly, if only he asked -her. And I'm sure one can't wonder at his being so run-after as he -is, when one remembers what his money and position are, what immense -influence they give him, what an excellent character he bears, and -how thoroughly good he is in every way. However, you know already how -high he stands in my good graces, and I had better drop the subject -for fear of boring you by going over the same old tale again. Only do -remember, my darling, that it is only the earnest wish I have to -secure your happiness which makes me so anxious for you not to -dismiss him without well considering what you do. Otherwise you may, -perhaps, some day find yourself repenting your past decision, and -regretting that you were so persistent in rejecting one of the few -men of whom it may truly be said, that he is all that a husband -should be."</p> - -<p>Not badly done, my lady, thought I, as I refolded the letter, and -restored it to its place. You knew what a tempting bait power is to -Kitty when you put in that bit about the influence which the young -man's position gives him. And you understood who you were writing to -when you reminded her of his attractiveness to other people—she's -likely enough to value goods at the price the rest of the world put -upon them. Evidently you, like the servants, are puzzled to account -for her indisposition to receive the proposals of this rich, titled, -desirable, and altogether delightful suitor. Well! it rather puzzles -me too. Can it be that she prefers some one else? No one seems to -suspect such a thing; but yet it might be true for all that. What if -that photograph I found in her purse were the explanation of the -mystery? There is no impossibility in the idea of a <i class="loanword">tendresse</i> -existing between her and Captain Norroy, which they have hitherto -managed to conceal from other people. I wish I could see them -together, and then I should have some chance of discovering whether -this conjecture of mine is right or not.</p> - -<p>Whilst speculating thus, a brilliant idea suddenly flashed into my -mind. This was, that I might avail myself of the surreptitiously-obtained -<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">carte-de-visite</i> (which I had carefully preserved), in order to find -out what I wanted to know. I would produce it unexpectedly, when -there was no chance of Kitty's being particularly on guard, and watch -for any signs of emotion that she might show on seeing it.</p> - -<p>Wrapped up exactly as it had been when in her purse, and even in the -self-same bit of paper, I put it into a blank envelope, which I -presented next time I went to wait on her.</p> - -<p>"I picked this up on the floor, just outside," said I. "I was going -to take it to the landlord; but then I thought perhaps it might be -something of yours, as I found it close to the door of your room, so -I had better ask you about it first."</p> - -<p>The envelope was not fastened, as I had feared that if it were closed -she would scruple to open it, which would be fatal to the success of -my stratagem.</p> - -<p>"Thank you," she answered, taking it from me carelessly. "I don't -think it belongs to me, but I can soon see."</p> - -<p>I was doing her hair at the time, and commanded an excellent view of -her face reflected in the looking-glass opposite which she sat. Her -expression of <i class="loanword">insouciance</i> vanished like magic when she had undone -the paper and seen what it contained. The colour rushed into her -face, which softened for a moment in a way I had never before seen it -do, then came a stern, rigid, haughty, resolute look, as though she -would defy the whole world to discover whatever secret she chose to -conceal.</p> - -<p>She did not speak at first, but turned round the photograph again -and again, examining both it and the paper in which it had been -wrapped.</p> - -<p>At last she said: "This certainly is my property; but I -can't imagine how it came to be where you found it. I fully believed -it to have been lost some time ago."</p> - -<p>"Don't you think," I suggested, "that when you thought you had lost -it, you had perhaps really only slipped it into your writing-case, or -into some book or papers which you haven't happened to open since -then until now? Then it fell out without your noticing it, and either -you were at that time at the place where I picked it up, or else some -one's dress may have swept it there from your room. It was very near -to the door."</p> - -<p>"That is <em>possible</em>, no doubt," she returned, thoughtfully. "Yet -still, I can hardly believe it to have happened so. I felt as -positive as one can be about anything, that it was not in an envelope -at all, and that I had put it"—she hesitated a moment, and then -finished, "somewhere else."</p> - -<p>As she did not seem inclined to mention where she really had put it, -I thought I had better pretend to suppose that its destination had -been a photograph-album.</p> - -<p>"It would be very easy to be mistaken about what you had done with -it, though," said I. "Probably when it was given you it was in an -envelope, and then you were interrupted just as you were going to -stick it into your book, and after that you forgot all about it, and -it got mislaid."</p> - -<p>"Well, you may be right," she replied. "Indeed I don't see any other -way of accounting for the matter. But it is odd how I can have been -so completely wrong in the impression I had as to what I had done -with it."</p> - -<p>The theory I had propounded seemed sufficiently plausible to content -her, and she did not again allude to the affair. But I had little -doubt that she thought about it a good deal for all that, because of -a new look which I noticed in her face occasionally during the next -day or two, and which was different from any other that I had seen -there hitherto. A gleam of soft light would flash out from her eyes, -accompanied by an expression of countenance which was curious, -half-ashamed, tender, and wistful, and gave the impression rather -of unhappiness than of the joy a girl would be likely to feel when -thinking of her lover. This look of sadness would last perhaps for a -minute, and then invariably be succeeded by one that was scornful, -hard, and impenetrable.</p> - -<p>It was beyond me to interpret these signs satisfactorily. That -Captain Norroy had power to excite emotions of <em>some</em> kind in her -breast I felt sure; but whether these emotions were pleasurable or -the reverse, I was unable to make out.</p> - -<h2 id="c13">CHAPTER XIII.<br /> - -<small>LORD CLEMENT.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">Lady Mervyn's prediction regarding Lord Clement's movements proved to -be correct. His yacht, <i class="name">La Catalina</i>, arrived at Cannes two or three -days after we did, and that event was speedily followed by the -appearance of her noble owner at the hotel where we were staying.</p> - -<p>The interest with which Kitty's affairs inspired me had led to my -speculating a good deal on the subject of this young lord; and I had -made up my mind that he was almost sure to have something or other -disagreeable about him which would counterbalance his many charms, -and afford some explanation of her unwillingness to accept him. No -doubt, thought I, he is loutish, silly, ugly, untidy, bad mannered, -eccentric, or in some other way objectionable. This anticipation, -however, turned out to be wrong, and I soon perceived that he had -none of the defects with which my lively imagination had credited -him.</p> - -<p>He was rather below middle height, dressed well and quietly, -and could never by any accident be mistaken for anything but a -gentleman—which, indeed, he certainly was in every respect. Neither -handsome nor ugly, his face was amiable and mild, but possessed no -other very marked expression of any kind. One would not suppose him -to be powerful or weak, distinguished or insignificant, a genius or a -fool. If there was nothing specially attractive about his appearance, -neither was there the reverse.</p> - -<p>His intellect was not in any way brilliant, but he had good sense and -fair average abilities, was eminently painstaking, and would work as -laboriously at whatever he thought it his duty to do as though his -livelihood had depended on his exertions. In short, I think that the -most appropriate description of him is mediocrity, in respect of -everything except moral qualities; but where these were concerned he -was by no means mediocre, being far more conscientious and anxious to -do right than are the majority of rich young men who have the world -at their feet.</p> - -<p>The most trying thing about him was a tendency to make a fuss about -trifles, and to attach a needless importance to all the minor -proprieties of life, which was sometimes rather irritating. But, -after all, fidgettiness and extra deference to Mrs. Grundy are only -very small defects in the eyes of most people. I could understand -that Kitty might occasionally be aggravated by these failings, yet -they alone were not, in my opinion, sufficient to account for his -being refused by a girl who was ambitious, and who had enough -perspicacity and worldly wisdom to appreciate what an excellent match -he was, and what an opening for ambition would be afforded by the -position of his wife.</p> - -<p>I was curious to know how Kitty treated him, and profited by every -opportunity I had of watching them together. From these observations -I came to the conclusion that he had inspired her neither with -affection nor aversion, and that she was struggling to bring herself -to accept him. I thought that her reason and judgment were pleading -for him, and expatiating on his attractions, as her mother had done, -and that she was lending a willing ear to these advocates, and doing -all she could to let herself be convinced by their arguments. Yet I -had a great idea, too, that the effort went against the grain with -her, and that she often could not help keeping him at arm's length, -even in spite of her own wish. It was as if she had been conscious -of the grasp of an invisible hand, from which she could not wrench -herself free, and which constantly drew her back when she strove to -approach nearer to her suitor.</p> - -<p>Is it Captain Norroy's hand that restrains her? I asked myself, as I -pondered over this result of my observations. Yet, if so, it seems -very odd that no one except me should have discovered their attachment -for one another. From all that I have seen and heard I should have -thought that a young couple in society would never have managed to -become spoons to any serious degree without giving rise to some -amount of suspicion as to the true state of affairs between them. -How ever can these two have contrived to deceive the lynx eyes of -gossip-loving servants, and to hoodwink the worldly and wide-awake -Lady Mervyn, whose heart is set on securing a brilliant match for her -favourite daughter?</p> - -<p>Lord Clement's behaviour towards Kitty after his arrival at Cannes -seemed to me that of a man who felt himself to be on trial—was -nervous lest she should think him over eager in his addresses, and -objected to getting himself talked about with a girl who perhaps -would not marry him after all. His first proceeding was to get -introduced to Mrs. Rollin, who had till then been a stranger to him. -The introduction was easily effected, and after that he had no lack -of opportunities of meeting the object of his affections; for Mrs. -Rollin responded cordially to his advances, inviting him to join in -all the excursions to neighbouring lions which she and Kitty made, -and letting it be apparent that he was most welcome whenever he chose -to pay them a visit, and to accompany them anywhere.</p> - -<p>I have no doubt that this civility of hers resulted, in the first -instance, from something said by Lady Mervyn as to his admiration -for Kitty, and the desirability of encouraging him as much as -possible. But though this may have been the original motive of the -<i class="loanword">empressement</i> with which Mrs. Rollin received him, there was no fear -of her not welcoming him for his own sake when once she had made -acquaintance with him and discovered what he was like. For she was a -person who held that the most important matter in life was to stand -well in the world's opinion, and consequently she was quite charmed -with his scrupulous regard for <i class="loanword">convenances</i> and extreme horror of -doing anything that could shock Mrs. Grundy.</p> - -<p>"There's nothing of more consequence," Mrs. Rollin would declare, -"than to keep up appearances, because, provided one does that, one is -quite safe to be thought perfect. And that's what every one wishes to -be thought, or, if they don't, they ought to. I call it quite wicked -of any one to pretend that it doesn't matter what the world's opinion -about them is. Depend upon it, that whatever the whole world thinks -<em>can't</em> be wrong; and that if a person is generally condemned or -praised, there's always some good reason for the blame or the -approval."</p> - -<p>Keeping up appearances in the eyes of the world was, therefore, -her standard of perfection; and she strove zealously never to fall -short of that standard, and always to fulfil its requirements -punctiliously. Nevertheless, it would be a mistake to deduce from -this that she was such an abject slave of the world's opinion as to -let herself be governed by it in things which it did not see. On the -contrary, she drew a line between her public and private actions, and -did not allow it to interfere at all with the latter. If she had -tastes and inclinations to which it objected, she did not, on that -account, sacrifice them, if it was possible that they could be -indulged in secret. How she would act, under such circumstances, was -illustrated by her behaviour regarding French novels. These she -preferred to any other kind of reading, and greedily devoured as -many as she could lay hold of. But as she knew that the world -sometimes thinks fit to frown at an indiscriminate study of these -books (who shall say whether that disapprobation is real or -feigned?), therefore she was careful not to reveal her partiality for -them. Yet she did not rush to the opposite extreme and disclaim any -acquaintance whatsoever with that class of literature. She had no -idea of hiding her light under a bushel, and not being duly credited -with as many accomplishments as she possessed, and therefore liked -to have it known that she understood a foreign language well enough -to read and enjoy works written in it. So what she did was, to -profess to read French novels solely with the laudable object of -keeping up her French; while, at the same time, she was most cautious -in talking about them in public, and never betrayed the slightest -knowledge of the contents of any that were not fairly decorous and -proper.</p> - -<p>But <em>I</em> knew better than that. It was a matter in which her maid -could not be deceived as easily as the rest of the world.</p> - -<p>Bohemianism being an open setting-at-defiance of the world's opinion, -was quite detestable to her, with all that savoured thereof; and the -very correct Lord Clement was, of course, a man after her own heart. -There was, however, a wide difference between the respective ways in -which he and she regarded Mrs. Grundy. For while the gentleman had a -genuine esteem for that great social authority, and paid her homage -in all sincerity, Mrs. Rollin did it only in appearance, and was -moved thereto chiefly by fear.</p> - -<p>The room in which I slept was immediately over Mrs. Rollin's -sitting-room; and by sitting at the open window in my room I could -hear—when the weather was calm—most things that were said by people -on the balcony beneath. Thus I overheard an interesting conversation -as to plans which took place after we had been at Cannes for about as -long a time as my two ladies intended to stay there. Where to go -next, was the question they were debating. And as Lord Clement -happened to call just then, Mrs. Rollin appealed to him to assist -them with his advice in the matter.</p> - -<p>His manner of complying with this request was eminently characteristic -of him. Kitty's society was the object of his keenest desires at -that moment, and he was averse to the idea of any movement that would -involve his being separated from her. Under these circumstances, and -considering the amount of encouragement he had received—especially -from the young lady's <i class="loanword">chaperone</i>—some men would have taken it for -granted that their companionship was acceptable, and that it was a -matter of course for them to accompany the two ladies to their next -destination. Not so, however, would Lord Clement behave. Thus openly -to attach himself to them as a travelling companion would inevitably -give rise to gossip; and to do anything likely to be talked about as -unusual was quite contrary to his ideas of propriety. Though the real -object of his visit to the Mediterranean might have been Kitty, yet -the ostensible reason had been yachting; and this pretext he had no -intention of renouncing by leaving his vessel. In taking part in the -discussion as to what our future movements were to be, he gave no -indication of being personally interested in the matter in any way, -and assumed the air of a strictly impartial adviser. At the same -time, however, his opinion as to the desirability of places was -in such remarkably exact proportion to their availability from -the sea, that I listened with much amusement, and thought that the -disinterestedness of his counsels might very fairly be doubted.</p> - -<p>Various localities had been suggested and talked over without any -determination being arrived at, when Kitty observed, "Now I've quite -a new place to propose; and that's Corsica. I saw it looking just -like a purple cloud resting on the sea the other day, and I have a -great fancy to go and see it close. For one thing, there's no railway -there yet; and I should like, for once in my life, to feel that I was -in a land through which locomotives have never puffed. It would be an -absolutely new sensation to me, and one which the present rate of -civilisation will soon render unattainable, I expect; so I vote we -experience it while we can. Besides, I'm sure it would be a good -place for sketching. What do you say, Aunt Georgina? Don't you think -it'll be pleasant to get away from this cockney old Riviera, and go a -little bit out of the regular beaten track where <em>every one</em> goes?"</p> - -<p>"Kitty, Kitty!" remonstrated her aunt, "it quite distresses me to -hear you talk like that! You really shouldn't speak contemptuously of -the beaten track, and be so anxious to get away from it. Remember -that the fact of its being worn by many feet is also a sure proof of -its being smoother, pleasanter, and in every way preferable to other -tracks."</p> - -<p>"All right, aunty," laughed Kitty; "I won't abuse your favourite -walk since it vexes you! But doesn't it strike you that I should -appreciate its merits all the more if I were to see with my own -eyes—just for once you know—how horrid some other route can be? And -isn't that a good reason for going to Corsica? <em>Do</em> let's go there; -I've quite set my heart on it."</p> - -<p>Kitty rarely failed to get her own way with Mrs. Rollin, who was -as susceptible as the rest of the world to the girl's powers of -fascination. But the hesitating, reluctant tone in which the elder -lady answered, showed me that she had no great fancy for this -Corsican visit. "Well, I hardly know what to say," she returned -slowly; "to begin with, How does one get there? and in the next -place, What's it like when one <em>is</em> there? I think I've heard you say -you were there once, Lord Clement; do help me to make up my mind -about this, and advise me whether or not to do what this rash niece -of mine wishes."</p> - -<p>Corsica naturally found favour in the young man's eyes as being -convenient for yachting purposes. "Oh, if you ask me, I decidedly -advise you to go," he replied; "it's really a pretty sort of country, -besides being interesting as the birthplace of Napoleon. By the by -you should read Boswell's tour if you go. As for getting there, you -<em>could</em> go by steamer either from Marseilles to Ajaccio, or else from -Leghorn or Genoa to Bastia. But I hope that you will allow me the -pleasure of taking you over in <i class="name">La Catalina</i>, which you'll find far -more comfortable than either of the regular steamers—they're all -nasty, dirty, uneasy little boats, I believe."</p> - -<p>"I'm sure we are greatly obliged to you for so good an offer," -answered Mrs. Rollin, "and I think we should gladly avail ourselves -of it <em>if</em> we were to decide upon going. But I fancy I've heard it -said that one can't get anything to eat there—which wouldn't suit me -at all. And then, too, there are the dangers from vendettas and -banditti to be taken into consideration."</p> - -<p>"Oh now, don't go being a perverse aunty, and making difficulties out -of nothing!" exclaimed Kitty. "How could the natives exist if there -wasn't something to eat? And a vendetta is a strictly private family -affair, which doesn't affect strangers one atom. And as for banditti, -it's not Corsica but Sicily that is full of them; my belief is that -you've gone and mixed the two islands together in your head. The -Corsicans are always supposed to be a particularly amiable and -friendly set of people as far as ever <em>I</em> heard. Except, of course, -when there's a vendetta to excite them, and that wouldn't matter to -outsiders like you and me."</p> - -<p>"I assure you that that is true, Mrs. Rollin," added Lord Clement, -"and that you have really no cause of apprehension from robbers. The -only danger of that kind which I ever heard mentioned during my stay -there was from escaped convicts. Now and then a few manage to get -out of the prison, I believe, and support themselves <i class="loanword">à la</i> brigand -on the mountains, till they are either retaken or else contrive to -get across to Sardinia to join some of the banditti there. But that -only happens so very seldom that it really is not worth taking into -consideration."</p> - -<p>"How about the hotels?" inquired Mrs. Rollin; "are there any good -ones to be met with?"</p> - -<p>"Oh, they are not at all bad at the two chief seaports—Ajaccio and -Bastia," he replied, "and there would not be any necessity for you -to sleep anywhere else. I could take you from the one town to the -other in my yacht, and from those places you could make inland -expeditions within the limits of a day, which would enable you to see -a great deal of the country without having to rough it at all. I -can't say much for the hotel accommodation anywhere except at the two -chief towns, and shouldn't recommend you to go travelling about in -the interior. But of course you would not care to visit the more wild -and out-of-the-way parts."</p> - -<p>"You mustn't be too sure of that," said Kitty, laughing. "Whatever a -place may be, it's attractive to me if it's different from any other -that I've ever seen before. And Aunt Georgina isn't <em>quite</em> so -miserable when beyond reach of luxuries as you might think to hear -her talk. I've even known her go without five o'clock tea and yet be -happy! For my part I begin to feel an intense desire arising in my -breast to hunt up an escaped convict and fraternise with him, or at -least to go and inspect his lair. What a novel subject for a sketch -it would be! And I'm <em>sure</em> that you'll like to do whatever pleases -me, aunty, for you always do. Now isn't that true?"</p> - -<p>"Well, well, perhaps I do my dear, but only within reasonable limits, -please to remember," returned her aunt, who was considerably -influenced by Lord Clement's support of the Corsican scheme. "People -of my age don't regard 'roughing it' with the same enthusiasm as some -of the young ones, who don't really know what that process implies, -and for whom it has all the charm of novelty. I should certainly -draw the line a long way before the escaped convict you wish to -meet. However, joking apart, from what Lord Clement says, there -does not seem to be any reason against running over to the island -and gratifying your whim to have a peep at it, though I quite agree -with him as to its being undesirable to penetrate into any remote -and inaccessible parts, where neither pleasure nor advantage are to -be gained. I never can see the good of going to places where no one -else goes. There's no one one knows there; and besides that, as no -one knows anything about them, there's no chance of finding them -necessary, or even useful, as topics of conversation in society. So -that visiting such places is mere waste of time and money in <em>my</em> -opinion!"</p> - -<p>"Well, then we may consider Corsica to be our next destination -anyhow," said Kitty triumphantly. "That's the first thing to settle, -and there is no need to make up our minds as to anything further just -yet. Time enough for that by and by, when we get there."</p> - -<p>After a little more discussion it was decided that we should be -conveyed to Ajaccio in <i class="name">La Catalina</i>; which vessel, though not -containing berths enough for us to have slept a night on board, was -yet quite capable of accommodating us very comfortably for the time -requisite to perform the passage between Cannes and Ajaccio. What our -plans should be after reaching the island was left quite uncertain; -for though Mrs. Rollin was well inclined to stay only at the two -chief towns and move from one to the other in the yacht, as Lord -Clement had proposed, yet Kitty was not to be induced to commit -herself to any definite approval of this scheme, and without her -approval it was impossible to feel sure of its being carried out, for -she generally got her own way about things she cared for. All she -would say was, that perhaps it might be a good plan and perhaps not, -and that there was not the least need to settle the matter positively -yet.</p> - -<p>Lord Clement was evidently happy to have had his offer of the yacht -accepted—for the voyage across at all events. But I think that his -satisfaction was somewhat marred by a dread of Kitty's taking the bit -between her teeth when once she should be at Corsica, running away -with her aunt, all over the island, and getting out of his reach from -the sea; if the whim to do it came to her, there was but small -probability that she would not accomplish her purpose.</p> - -<h2 id="c14">CHAPTER XIV.<br /> - -<small>AT AJACCIO.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">The inevitable Mediterranean roll was in less force than usual when -we crossed to Corsica, and as we were all pretty fair sailors we had -a pleasant passage, notwithstanding the anticipations to the contrary -of our especial waiter at the Cannes hotel. He was a brisk, cheery -little fellow, with such a power of sympathising with other people -that he always identified himself with those guests who were under -his particular care, and took their affairs to heart almost as though -they were his own. Going to sea and being sea-sick meant precisely -the same thing to him; consequently, from the moment he heard of our -contemplated trip he became full of compassion for the sufferings we -must undergo, and was good-naturedly eager to think of, and suggest, -every possible alleviation for the misery which he confidently -predicted for us. As we departed from the hotel his final words were -to impress upon my two ladies that, last thing before going to sea, -one should always eat a hearty meal, because, "<span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">ça-facilite—et sans -ça, c'est si fatigante.</span>" I am sorry to have to add, however, that -this well-intentioned speech was received in by no means as friendly -a spirit as that in which it was offered. For it was quite contrary -to Mrs. Rollin's notions of propriety that one who was a man, and -an inferior, should presume publicly to give her advice as to the -management of her interior; so, instead of making the amicable -response that was evidently expected, she swept past him with a -freezing look and an audible remark to Kitty about the atrocious -vulgarity of foreign servants who had never been taught to know their -place.</p> - -<p>When we arrived at Ajaccio we separated from Lord Clement, he -remaining on board <i class="name">La Catalina</i>, whilst we proceeded to a hotel. -During the voyage Kitty had been more civil to him than usual,—perhaps -as a reward for his assistance in persuading her aunt to come to -Corsica,—and this favourable humour still continued on reaching -<i class="loanword">terra firma</i>. A question hazarded by him as we left the yacht, as -to what should be done next day, was replied to by her with a -graciousness which made it apparent that his company would be -acceptable, if he chose to join her and her aunt in whatever they -might be doing.</p> - -<p>Accordingly, I was not surprised to see him appear at our hotel first -thing next morning. Shortly afterwards they all three sallied forth -to see the pictures at the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Collège</i> Fesch; then they ordered a -basket to be packed with provisions, and, the weather being splendid, -hired a carriage and drove off for a day's outing beyond Pisciatella. -The special object of the two younger people was sketching, to which -Kitty was greatly addicted, and for which she had a decided talent. -Lord Clement, on the contrary, had no natural gift in that line; -but, none the less, he strove laboriously to acquire the art, because -he regarded drawing as a highly moral, elevating, correct, and -unexceptionable amusement, and therefore one to be cultivated and -encouraged as much as possible. As for Mrs. Rollin, she had a French -novel in her pocket, and would be perfectly happy to bask in the sun -and read whilst her companions sketched or flirted, as might seem -good in their own eyes.</p> - -<p>My employers being thus disposed of for the day, I was left alone -with nothing particular to do. The streets were too filthy to be very -inviting, so, being a good walker, I went for a stretch along the -road towards the Isles Sanguinaires. It was a lovely day, and I -thoroughly enjoyed the beauty of the walk, and the contrast between -winter, represented by snow-covered Monte Oro in the distance, and -summer, felt in the hot sunshine that warmed me through and through, -and sparkled on the brilliant blue sea beside the road. And when I -got beyond the limits of the town there were wild hillsides rising -on my right, all covered with low bushes of some kind of cistus, -which, though now brown and scrubby-looking, would be beautiful, I -thought, when in full bloom.</p> - -<p>But I must not expatiate on the scenery, as that has nothing to do -with my story. What I saw in the course of that walk, to which I now -wish particularly to call attention, is this: Near the outskirts of -the town I came to a number of small houses standing pretty close -together on one side of the road. Each was in the middle of a little -plot of ground, which was surrounded either by a wall, or else by -strong iron railings; and this enclosure was only to be entered by a -gate, whence a short drive led to the door of the house within. Some, -but not all, had a family name stuck up at the entrance; and some of -the plots of ground were merely turfed over, whilst others were -nicely laid out in flower-beds and borders.</p> - -<p>One would naturally have concluded these buildings to be villas, if -it had not been for the curious fact of their being destitute of -windows. This puzzled me; for I did not suppose that Corsicans could -be different from the rest of the world in disliking to live in -windowless habitations.</p> - -<p>Whilst I was staring at these mysterious houses, and wondering what -they were for, a funeral came along the main road, and turned into -the gate of the outer enclosure of one of them. This excited my -curiosity still more, so I addressed myself to a respectable looking -passer-by, and asked him what those little villas were, and to whom -they belonged. He replied that they were "<span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">chapelles mortuaires,</span>" or, -in other words, private burialplaces, and that each one belonged -to a different family. On questioning further, I learnt that these -"<span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">chapelles mortuaires</span>" were by no means peculiar to the neighbourhood -of towns, but were found in remote parts of the island also, as the -possession of them was quite customary amongst all Corsicans.</p> - -<p>I thanked the man for his information, and continued my walk. I -thought it seemed a quaint idea to build villa residences for the -dead, and I then dismissed the subject from my mind. Certainly it -never entered my head that I myself was destined before long to make -acquaintance with the interior of one.</p> - -<p>That evening I discovered that Kitty had a new scheme in her head. -What instigated her to it I cannot say. It may have been the spirit -of perversity, or else a guide-book which she had been studying -diligently; or else, perhaps, that she was tired of being civil to -Lord Clement, and wanted to escape from him for a while. But anyhow, -for some reason or other, it had been borne in upon her that it -would be the most delightful thing possible to make a fortnight's -driving-tour through the island for the purpose of seeing the country -and sketching. Knowing that she would probably have a difficulty in -getting her aunt to consent to this scheme, she did not intend to -propound it until she had first ascertained that it was really -feasible, and also found out whatever information might be requisite -for its execution.</p> - -<p>Her first step, therefore, was to impart the project to me, telling -me that she wished me to make inquiries as to various matters -connected with it—such as what sort of inns were to be found at the -small inland towns; whether the roads were in good condition for -travelling on; whether they were likely to be blocked by snow in the -mountainous districts; what it would cost to hire a carriage; who was -the best jobmaster in Ajaccio, etc.</p> - -<p>I was charmed at a plan which harmonised so well with my own love of -change and adventure, and entered into it readily. Being curious to -know whether she contemplated being accompanied by Lord Clement or -not, I put a fishing question to that effect. "What sized carriage am -I to ask about?" said I; "how many must it hold?"</p> - -<p>"Why, my aunt and I, and you, <em>of course</em>," she answered rather -sharply, as if not well pleased at my having entertained a doubt on -the subject. "I should have thought you might have known that -yourself. We should only take a couple of carpet bags with us, and -leave the heavy luggage behind, so as to travel as light as possible; -therefore we shouldn't want at all a big carriage. It should be an -open one, and have a hood to put up in case of rain."</p> - -<p>Oh, thought I, on hearing this, evidently then my lord is meant to be -left to himself; his fair weather has not lasted long after all. I -suppose that she has been putting a strain on herself to be civil to -him, that now comes the reaction, and that she is going to fly off at -a tangent from the line of conduct which was dictated by worldly -policy, and not by natural inclination. Well, it does not matter to -me whether she marries him or not, so I do not want to interfere one -way or other; I have only to look on at the play and be amused. I -hope she will be able to carry out this driving-tour scheme anyhow; -for it is just the sort of thing I should like myself.</p> - -<p>I lost no time in performing her commission to the best of my ability. -Entering into casual conversations with sundry natives—waiters, for -instance, a couple of talkative shopkeepers, and the driver of a -fiacre who was sunning himself on the steps of his vehicle—I -cautiously led up to the topics which I had been told to find out -about, knowing that a stranger was more likely to arrive at an -honest opinion in this indirect way than by blunt, straightforward -inquiries. By means of questions that were apparently purposeless, I -elicited a good deal of information as to the relative merits of -different hostelries and individuals, which might very likely have -been withheld if I had let it be seen that I had any especial reason -for wishing to know. Thus I learnt too who was reputed the best -<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">patron des voitures</i>, and how much would be the probable difference -between what he would <em>ask</em> and what he would <em>take</em> for the hire of -a carriage; this difference being a sum of from 8 to 12 francs a day, -according to the opinion he happened to form of the hard-headedness -and determination not to be cheated of whoever engaged him.</p> - -<p>Having found out as much as I could, I passed it all on to Kitty, -who, armed with this knowledge, took the opportunity of hair-brushing -time that same evening to suggest the driving-tour to Mrs. Rollin. -That lady at once pronounced the scheme wild and impracticable. On -being asked why, she brought forward all the objections she could -think of, every one of which was met and answered by Kitty with a -readiness that quite staggered her aunt. Mrs. Rollin had been far too -much engrossed in one of Zola's novels to notice the attention with -which her niece had recently been perusing books of Corsican travel; -and the unexpected and intimate acquaintance with the subject -suddenly displayed by Kitty almost took away the aunt's breath. -Evidently it had never occurred to her that there was a possibility -of Kitty's thus making up her mind, and finding out all requisite -particulars, without having given a single hint of what she was -thinking of. Yet here was the plan, all cut and dried and ready, -with every detail gone into.</p> - -<p>Certainly the girl made the most of what she had read and heard; and -no one, to hear her talk, would have believed that this was her first -visit to the island. She discoursed learnedly about where the best -scenery was; what towns had good accommodation; what were the names -of the various inns; and what the cost of living and of the carriage -would be. She had got up her subject thoroughly; had an answer ready -for all difficulties that it was possible to suggest; made everything -look <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">couleur-de-rose</i>; and quoted, as a precedent for what she -wanted to do, which would have weight with her hearer, the example -of an English lady of rank and fashion, who had been travelling about -in Corsica a few years before, and of whom she had just happened to -hear. Kitty's energy, skill in pleading her cause, and powers of -persuasion, were more than her admiring and less strong-willed -relative could resist. The scheme, as thus set forth, appeared quite -delightful; Lord Clement was on board his yacht, beyond reach of -being taken into consultation; and so the end of the matter was, -that Mrs. Rollin assented to all that Kitty wished, and that I -consequently received orders to go out the first thing next morning -and arrange for hiring a carriage.</p> - -<p>This I accordingly did; and as I passed through the streets towards -the residence of the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">patron des voitures</i>, I met Lord Clement on his -way to the hotel, looking just as usual—that is to say, the essence -of propriety, clean, well-dressed, placid, gentlemanlike, English, -and (to my mind,) uninteresting. I did not dislike him, but his -intense love of respectability and correctness aggravated me; and I -thought, maliciously, that his present placid satisfaction would be -ruffled by the news of the contemplated expedition, and that I should -like to see his face when he heard of it. For it could hardly be -expected that a man who had brought the object of his affections to a -place where he hoped to be able to be with her daily, would relish -the sudden discovery that she was going to leave him in the lurch, -and take herself off out of his reach for a fortnight at least, if -not longer.</p> - -<h2 id="c15">CHAPTER XV.<br /> - -<small>A DRIVING EXPEDITION IN CORSICA.</small></h2> - -<p class="noindent">My position as a servant gave me no opportunity of knowing whether -or not Lord Clement made any attempt to oppose the projected -driving-tour. If he did, however, his interference certainly produced -no effect; for the orders I had received were not countermanded, and -on the following day we three unprotected females departed from -Ajaccio, and set out upon our travels into the interior of the -island. Our conveyance was a light open carriage, with a head that -could be raised or lowered at pleasure. As the trap only held two -people comfortably inside, I sat on the box by the driver; and the -very moderate amount of luggage that accompanied us was fastened -securely at the back of the vehicle.</p> - -<p>It was a beautiful morning, and everything seemed to promise well for -our expedition. Driving in an open carriage was a thing which Mrs. -Rollin greatly affectioned, and always declared it to be impossible -for her ever to tire of; and as she was rendered additionally -complacent by having been able to procure a sufficient stock of -French novels to obviate all risk of dulness, she was in a happy and -contented frame of mind, which Kitty and I—ourselves in the highest -spirits, and ready to make the best of everything—were most anxious -she should retain.</p> - -<p>The scenery was much admired, especially the lovely views that were -to be had, looking back over Ajaccio and the blue waters of its bay. -The small, jet-black, silky-looking sheep were noticed and commented -on; so were the vineyards which we passed, the chestnut, fig, almond, -and olive trees; and, beyond everything, the arbutus bushes, which -called forth many exclamations of admiration and delight. No wonder; -for it really was a sight to see acres and acres of them growing wild -in luxuriant profusion, and covered with magnificent luscious-looking -fruit, whose size and brilliancy of colouring far exceeded that of -any arbutus berries which I have ever seen elsewhere.</p> - -<p>A drive of about three hours brought us to Cauro, where there was -some idea that we should sleep that night, if the inn looked -inviting; if not, we were to go on to St. Marie Sicché. Corsican inns -are generally extremely clean, and the one at Cauro was no exception -to the rule. But alas! it could supply neither milk nor butter, and -nothing in the shape of meat except "<span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">merles.</span>"</p> - -<p>I was not at all astonished at this, because I had already been told -in Ajaccio that travellers in the island could not rely on finding -meat everywhere, and that at the present time of winter butter and -milk would certainly be unattainable, except at one or two of the -very largest towns. This piece of information had been duly -communicated by me to Kitty; but somehow or other it had not reached -the ears of her aunt, and that good lady was disagreeably surprised -at a scarcity of luxuries for which Kitty and I were quite prepared. -She at once voted for not sleeping at Cauro, but going on to St. -Marie Sicché, where she had no doubt there would be a better stock of -provisions. Of course Kitty and I were not equally sanguine as to -this; but we did not tell her that fact, as she would find out the -state of affairs quite soon enough for herself, and there was -obviously no use in damping her spirits just at the outset of the -expedition. Accordingly, we refreshed ourselves with coffee, eggs, -bread, and fruit, and then continued our journey as soon as the -horses were baited.</p> - -<p>In crossing the Col de San Giorgio there were fine views over the -surrounding country which excited Kitty's artistic instincts; so the -carriage was stopped for her to make a sketch, and meanwhile Mrs. -Rollin buried herself in one of her beloved novels, and I beguiled -the time by talking to the driver, and drawing out his notions as to -things in general connected with his country. I found that he was a -pleasant, conversational individual, who avowed his mercenariness -with unblushing frankness, and laughed at the idea of being expected -to entertain any political opinions of his own. "<span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Celui qui donne le -pain à un Corse, c'est son père,</span>" said he; "that's one of our -proverbs. I'm imperialist, royalist, republican, or anything else, -according to who my employer is. Just now I'm whatever pleases your -two ladies, as it is they who pay me." Perceiving that he carried -pistols, I asked him if he did so because of a vendetta—thinking -that in that case it might be a little awkward for us if he should -happen to fall in with an enemy whilst he was in our service; and -that it was as well to know what one had to expect. However, the -unmistakable sincerity with which he disclaimed anything of the kind -put me quite at my ease again. "A vendetta!" he exclaimed; "no -indeed! neither I nor my family have a quarrel with any living -creature. For all that, I never go unarmed on this sort of expedition -because of the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">penitenciers</i>, who manage to get out of prison now -and then."</p> - -<p>"Poor wretches," said I; "I should have thought that they'd be more -afraid of you than you of them. Did they ever do you any harm?"</p> - -<p>"No," he answered, "I've never had any trouble with them myself, but -they <em>have</em> been known to attack carriages, and to be very awkward -customers, too; and as I like to be on the safe side, I always take -arms with me, as you see."</p> - -<p>"Why, one might think these escaped prisoners were regular banditti -to hear you talk," I returned, rather scornfully; for I did not -believe in there being any real ground for alarm on account of -<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">penitenciers</i>.</p> - -<p>"Well, and so they are," he replied; "there's plenty of room for any -number of people to hide amongst the various kinds of bushes—<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maquis</i> -as we call them—which grow wild over the hills and large tracts of -uninhabited waste land. They form almost impenetrable thickets, where -a <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">penitencier</i> has little trouble in keeping out of the way; there -he lives as best he can, subsisting chiefly on the quails and -woodcocks, of which the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maquis</i> is full, and helping himself -to the property of other people whenever he gets a chance. For he is -sure to be a <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">vaurien</i>."</p> - -<p>I shrugged my shoulders, thinking it would be a long while before -<em>I</em> should take the trouble to carry arms for fear of some Mrs. -Harris of a <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">penitencier</i>, who probably had no existence save in the -imaginations of the timid and the credulous. Our conversation ended -there, as Kitty had completed her sketch, and we resumed our course. -That evening I told her of the driver's absurd precautions, and found -she was as much amused at the idea as I was, and we had a good laugh -at the man's excessive prudence. It was, however, a joke which was -not imparted to Mrs. Rollin, as she, being somewhat inclined to be -nervous, might possibly not have regarded the matter in the same -light that we did; and the knowledge of the driver's thinking it -necessary to carry pistols would perhaps have put uncomfortable -notions into her head. Of course anything likely to do that was to be -avoided most carefully; as, if she became alarmed or disgusted in any -way, she might insist on cutting short the expedition, and returning -at once to more civilised places, which would have been a great bore. -I was far more afraid of this happening than of any perils from -<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">penitenciers</i>; and I eagerly seconded Kitty's efforts to make -everything smooth and pleasant, and to keep her aunt contented.</p> - -<p>I began to foresee, however, that there would be some difficulty in -doing this for long; and I felt considerable misgivings as to whether -Mrs. Rollin would be induced to carry out the driving-tour programme -in its entirety. The good humour in which she had started in the -morning already showed signs of diminishing. In spite of the -cleanliness of the inns, they were a good deal rougher than she -liked; and though at the hostelry at St. Marie Sicché there was -fortunately some meat, yet she was again obliged to put up with -milkless coffee and butterless bread. It was the latter of these two -grievances to which she especially objected.</p> - -<p>"Though I like <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">café au lait</i> best myself," she said, "still I don't -so much mind drinking black coffee, because that is quite correct, -and a thing that numbers of people do—especially after dinner. But -as for dry bread!—why, that's what paupers in the workhouse have to -eat! I do hope, Kitty, that you won't mention to our friends at home -that we had to put up with such mean food; I shouldn't like it to be -said that I went travelling in places where the people were so poor -or so stingy as not even to afford themselves butter!"</p> - -<p>We both did what we could to pacify her; Kitty by promising -inviolable secrecy, and I by making the landlord rummage out some -<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">confitures</i>, which, though but indifferent, would at all events save -her from the reproach of having had to breakfast on dry bread, -whether she liked it or no. This appeased her partially; but still I -saw that her wonted serenity was not altogether restored.</p> - -<p>Up to this point we had been travelling along the highroad used by -the diligences, the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">route nationale, royale,</i> or <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">imperiale</i>, as it is -called, according to which party happens to be in power. But we -turned off from it next day, on leaving St. Marie Sicché, and took to -smaller and inferior roads by which we ascended to higher ground, -until we reached the town of Zicavo, perched on the side of a steep -hill and surrounded by chestnut trees.</p> - -<p>Unluckily the picturesqueness of its situation did not suffice to -reconcile Mrs. Rollin to its deficiency of milk and butter, or to the -roughness of its inn, and she expressed much astonishment that a -town of its importance did not provide better accommodation for -travellers. Another thing that was beginning to annoy her was the -republican equality and disregard for class distinctions which she -found prevailing everywhere, and which were by no means to her taste. -The Corsicans, though perfectly civil and well behaved, were no -respecters of rank, and each one seemed to consider himself quite as -good as any one else. When the driver came in the evening to ask for -his orders for next day, he sat down while talking to the ladies, as -a matter of course; and the landlords of the inns took the same -liberty in their presence, all of which was much to Mrs. Rollin's -disgust. Then, too, she had to do without a private sitting-room, for -the inns had only one room that was not a bedroom, and that one was a -big public room, which served as sitting-room and dining-room to all -classes alike; so that she was obliged either to stay altogether in -her sleeping apartment, or else to condescend to sit at the same -table with the landlord, his family, the driver, me, and any -<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">commis-voyageur</i>, shopkeeper, peasant, or other person who might -happen to come in. Besides this, the inquisitiveness which is -characteristic of Corsicans offended her. She could not bear the -freedom with which people whom she considered inferiors would -cross-examine herself and Kitty as to their age; whether they were -married; if not, why not; what they did with themselves; what -relatives they had; where they were going; and similar personal -matters. And as I perceived her growing irritation at these various -petty annoyances, I became more and more doubtful whether we should -be able to reconcile her to them sufficiently to induce her to put -up with them for a whole fortnight.</p> - -<p>One of the reasons which had brought us to Zicavo was the fact that -it was only five or six kilometers from the baths of Guitera, where -there are warm sulphurous springs. Mrs. Rollin, who never willingly -lost an opportunity of bathing in mineral waters, was very anxious -to see what the Guitera baths were like; and if they proved -satisfactory, we should probably remain for a few days at Zicavo, -whence she could drive over and have a daily bathe. Accordingly, on -the day after we got to Zicavo, she and Kitty went to inspect the -bathing establishment at Guitera. However, they found it so wretched -looking a little place, and of so uninviting an exterior, that she at -once declared nothing would induce her to set foot inside it, and -that, as there was nothing to stay for at Zicavo, we had better go on -again immediately in hopes of finding better quarters elsewhere. It -was decided, therefore, that we should next day proceed across the -Serra Scopomeno to St. Lucia di Tallano. We must allow plenty of time -for the journey, we were told, as the roads were heavy, and it was -not impossible we might be hindered by snow. Consequently my -mistresses determined to get off early in the morning, in order to -have the whole day before them. And after giving directions to that -effect, Mrs. Rollin secluded herself and Kitty in their own bedrooms, -and remained there for the rest of the evening, beyond reach of -contamination from the company in the public room.</p> - -<p>I, however, was less particular, and sat there till I went to bed, -fraternising with the landlord's wife, watching all that went on, and -enjoying the opportunity of seeing a little of the manner of life of -a foreign race. It was a novel experience, and that is a thing that I -always like.</p> - -<p>What made it still more interesting was that the landlord was also -<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maire</i> of the commune, and as he used the public room as his -<i class="loanword">bureau</i> in which to carry on official transactions, I heard all that -went on between him and the different people who came to see him on -business. He seemed to be a good sort of fellow enough, only with -rather an excessive estimate of his own importance and omniscience. -Just as one of the visitors was going away, he suddenly bethought him -of something that had hitherto slipped his memory, and turned back at -the door.</p> - -<p>"By the by," said he to the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maire</i>, "some one said yesterday that -they heard there were one or two escaped <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">penitenciers</i> about again -somewhere or other. Have you heard anything about it, and do you -suppose it's true?"</p> - -<p>"True," repeated the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maire</i>; "of course not! People are always -setting about some foolish report in order to have something to talk -about, and so pretend that they know more than others! No—<em>I've</em> not -heard of it, because it's well known that I make it a rule to pay no -attention to absurd tales unsupported by reliable evidence, and that -makes the tattlers somewhat shy of bringing their stories to <em>me</em>. A -pretty state the country would come to if the important officials -were to believe all they're told, and go disturbing themselves about -every idle rumour!"</p> - -<p>I was amused at the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maire's</i> evident annoyance at some one else's -having heard this piece of gossip a whole day sooner than he had. -Otherwise I paid no attention to the matter, as I was not in the -least degree apprehensive of <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">penitenciers</i>. When a danger occurs but -rarely, the chances are so great against its occurring to any given -person that one is apt to regard it as non-existent.</p> - -<p>Before going to bed that night I repeated the orders that had been -given to have breakfast, our bill, and the carriage, in readiness for -an early start next day, and took care to make sure that they had -been thoroughly understood. Consequently I was provoked to find, when -I left my room in the morning, that the whole household had overslept -itself, and there was no sign of preparation for our departure.</p> - -<p>It was not to be endured that I should incur the stigma of being a -neglectful or incompetent travelling maid—I, who prided myself on my -talents as a courier! so I instantly set to work to arouse the -establishment from its sloth. Hunting about till I discovered where -a servant slept, I dragged her forcibly out of bed, and set her to -light the kitchen fire and prepare food. Then I woke the driver, and -insisted on his beginning at once to get ready the horses and -carriage. In short, I flew hither and thither, helping, hustling, and -exclaiming "<span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Dépêche!</span>" with such vigour that I managed fairly to -startle the leisurely Corsicans into a little activity, and to -procure breakfast for the two ladies, and get under weigh only half -an hour later than had been originally intended. The poor driver was -quite alarmed at my unexpected display of energy; he did not even -venture to wait to break his fast before starting, but hastily -crammed some food into his pocket for consumption on the road. I am -sure it was a relief to him to find that my severity relaxed when -once we were off; and that in order for him to eat his breakfast in -comfort, I was even willing to take the reins and drive, as I sat -beside him on the box.</p> - -<p>The weather was still propitious. Enough snow had fallen in the night -to whiten the tops of the hills surrounding Zicavo, but now the sun -was shining, and warming the keen, delicious mountain air as we drove -down the valley.</p> - -<p>We had not gone far before we met a funeral, which was so perfectly -simple, matter-of-fact, and devoid of anything ostentatious or -needless, that I thought it a model worthy of imitation in less -primitive places. Two mules drew a rough cart, in which lay the -corpse, uncoffined, and covered over with a gaudy-coloured shawl, -which allowed the outlines of the human form beneath to be plainly -visible. After the cart walked a dozen or so of people, betraying no -emotion, but looking serious and stolid. No vestige of black was to -be seen. They were dressed in their ordinary everyday garments, -carrying the bright-hued umbrellas which are popular in the island, -and the men having the customary wine-gourds slung round their -bodies. About the whole thing there was an absence of fuss, ceremony, -and demonstrativeness, combined with perfect gravity and propriety of -demeanour, which made me wish that all arrangers of funerals would -come and take a lesson at Zicavo.</p> - -<p>The only stop we made during the morning was at a tiny little -village, where we waited a few minutes for the horses to be watered. -Whilst this was done, the two ladies and I did not get out of the -carriage, but sat where we were, drawn up outside a miserable -tumble-down sort of hovel that did duty as an inn. The loungers of -the hamlet soon gathered round to stare at us, and were joined by two -men who issued from the house. They both had guns, as I saw; but -there was nothing in the least remarkable about that, because a -Corsican almost always carries a gun <em>or</em> an umbrella, and sometimes -both, so that their being armed did not at all astonish me. Nor did I -think it in any way peculiar when I heard them ask our driver who we -were, and where we were going. For I had by this time seen enough of -Corsican inquisitiveness to regard such inquiries as a mere matter of -course, and demonstrations of curiosity seemed to me more natural -than their absence.</p> - -<p>The two men left the inn almost immediately after their questions had -been answered. I saw them leave the village, and a little way farther -on I caught a glimpse of them again turning off the road, and -plunging into the thick bushes on either side. I concluded that they -were a couple of "<span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">chasseurs,</span>" such as one sees perpetually in -Corsica, and then thought no more about them.</p> - -<p>Our course at this period of the journey was very tortuous and -indirect, in consequence of numerous narrow valleys which were too -steep for anything on wheels to cross in a straight line. Therefore -the road often had to go round for miles, in order to get from one -side to another of a valley which was, perhaps, not a mile broad; -and the distance from point to point that had to be traversed by -whoever kept to the road was generally many times more than it would -have been to the proverbial crow. Hence it evidently followed that a -pedestrian, climbing straight up and down the precipitous hillsides -would be able to get over the ground as quickly as a carriage could -do. And if this is borne in mind, it will assist the reader in -comprehending the events which I have now to relate.</p> - -<h2 id="c16">CHAPTER XVI.<br /> - -<small>ESCAPED <span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">PENITENCIERS.</span></small></h2> - - -<p class="noindent">The horses were to be taken out of the carriage to have a thorough -rest, once in the course of the day, so we halted for that purpose -between twelve and one o'clock. We were then exactly at the head of -one of the long narrow valleys I have already mentioned. It was a -wild desolate spot, where not a habitation was to be seen, nor any -human being except ourselves. The view before us consisted of the sky -overhead, and of two steep hillsides—at some places appearing to be -barely a gunshot apart—which converged from the entrance of the -valley to the point where we were. These were clothed from top to -bottom with a dense mass of trees and <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maquis</i>, whose sombre -green tints, were only broken by a sharply-cut, thin, yellowish line, -which marked, on one hand, the road we had just traversed, and, on -the other, that by which we should presently continue the journey. -The sun had quite sufficient power to make shade acceptable, so we -seated ourselves under an <i class="loanword">ilex</i> by the side of a clear bubbling -spring of water, and ate the lunch that we had brought with us from -Zicavo.</p> - -<p>We were not long over the meal, and as soon as it was finished the -driver was asked when he would be ready to resume the journey. He -answered that the horses ought to have more than an hour longer of -rest, and that then they would go on quite fresh to the end of the -day. On hearing this Mrs. Rollin sent me to the carriage to fetch a -couple of cushions, with which she established herself comfortably on -the ground, and then opened one of Xavier de Montepin's novels. -Meanwhile Kitty had got out her drawing materials.</p> - -<p>"I think that I'll walk on, and see if I can't find a sketch -somewhere," she said. "As there's only one road, I can't possibly -lose my way; then you can pick me up when you overtake me in the -carriage." But her aunt was not prepared to assent readily to this -proposal.</p> - -<p>"Oh, you'd better not go on all by yourself, my dear," she said -uneasily. "Do try and find something to draw near here—a cloud or a -tree, or a bit of the road, or something. It's not the thing for a -girl of your age to be seen walking about the roads alone, you know."</p> - -<p>"I don't think that need trouble us in these solitudes," answered -Kitty laughing. "There's nothing except kites and crows to see what I -do, and I don't imagine that <em>they</em> will be much shocked at my -proceedings."</p> - -<p>"Don't you be too sure of there being only kites and crows," returned -Mrs. Rollin; "people often turn up so unexpectedly! There <em>might</em> be -some acquaintance of ours travelling here now; and if so, he or she -would be sure to meet us just when we didn't want to be met, and then -go home and say that I let you go about alone just as you pleased, -and that I took no care whatever of you! Besides, supposing your -sketching were to take you off the road, perhaps we should not see -where you were, and go past without knowing it. I should be in such a -fidget for fear of that happening, that I know I shouldn't enjoy the -drive <em>a bit</em> till I had you all safe with me again."</p> - -<p>"You needn't be uneasy on that score," said Kitty, looking at her -watch; "the jingling of the horses' bells could hardly fail to inform -me of your approach; but I won't trust only to that. I'll keep an eye -on the time, and as I can reckon certainly on your not leaving here -for another hour, I can calculate when to return to the road if I -should turn off it anywhere. I assure you I haven't the least -intention of doing anything so silly as to let myself be left behind, -so you can drive along with a perfectly tranquil mind, and an -absolute certainty that I am somewhere on ahead, until you see me -waiting for you."</p> - -<p>Here I took the liberty of joining in their conversation. Having been -sitting still and cramped up on the box for some time, I felt much -disposed to stretch my legs; so I said,</p> - -<p>"I shall be very glad to accompany Miss Mervyn if she has no -objection. Then I could stay on the road near where she is, if she -happens to leave it; and that would make it quite impossible for the -carriage to go past her by mistake."</p> - -<p>"Of <em>course</em>, that's the way to manage it," exclaimed Mrs. Rollin; -"how stupid of me not to have thought of it at first! Yes, Kitty—you -take Jill with you; it will look so much better than for you to be -wandering on by yourself; and then my mind will be quite easy about -not passing you by accident."</p> - -<p>"Very well," returned Kitty; "I'm afraid it'll be rather dull for her -dawdling about at my heels—only I daresay it won't be very lively to -stay here with nothing to do either, so she may as well come. We'll -start at once, Jill, please; for I want to have as much time as -possible for sketching before the carriage overtakes us."</p> - -<p>Accordingly she and I walked off briskly along the road which led -towards our destination, leaving Mrs. Rollin, the driver, and -carriage, to follow in course of time when the horses should be -sufficiently refreshed. We must have tramped, I should think, about -two miles before Kitty came to a place which inspired her with a -desire to make a sketch. Of course the next thing to be done was to -discover the most satisfactory point of view from which the sketch -was to be taken. After a little reconnoitring she found a spot that -was to her mind. It was a short distance below the road, and in -order to get to it we had to scramble down through a mass of arbutus, -and of an immense kind of heath, growing taller than our heads—which -two shrubs constituted the chief part of the scrub (or <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maquis</i>) at -that place.</p> - -<p>Having accompanied Kitty to the spot she had selected, and seen her -comfortably settled down to her drawing, I looked at my watch. This -showed me that there was still a long while to elapse before the -carriage would be in motion again, and that, therefore, there was no -need for me to be in a hurry about getting back to the road yet. -Watching Kitty sketch was not particularly amusing, so I left her and -wandered off through the bushes. About fifty yards from where she was -I came to a bit of broken rocky ground, somewhat resembling a tiny -quarry, and completely overgrown by arbutus. Here I tucked myself -away snugly into a corner under one of these bushes, and lay lazily -contemplating its splendid red and yellow berries, which were as big -as good-sized plums. They looked most delicious; and as I knew the -arbutus is not poisonous, I gathered a berry to ascertain whether the -taste at all corresponded to the appearance; I was disappointed to -find, however, that this was not the case, as the flavour, though -rather sweet, was insipid, watery, and vapid.</p> - -<p>My curiosity respecting arbutus fruit being thus satisfied, and I -having nothing particular to do, I next began amusing myself by -endeavouring to work out a rule-of-three sum in my head. But before -my calculations had advanced far they were interrupted by a crackling -rustling noise that issued from the bushes growing above, between me -and the road. It sounded as if some heavy body were making its way -through them; and the noise approached nearer and nearer, till it -reached quite close to the recess in which I was ensconced. Then the -crackling ceased, and I heard a male voice speaking in low and -cautious tones. A bit of rock, on which grew the bush under which I -was seated, intervened between me and the speaker, so that I could -not see him; but he was near enough for every one of his words to -be distinctly audible to me. He spoke in Italian—that being the -language which the people of the country almost always use amongst -themselves when they do not talk Corsican, though French is the -official tongue, and the one generally employed in communications -with foreigners.</p> - -<p>"But where are they, César?" said the voice, with a somewhat -impatient accent. "You say that from the top of the hill you plainly -saw two of them who left the carriage to repose itself, and went on -alone. Is it not droll how those English always desire to walk? In -that case they ought to be somewhere about here now, yet we have -looked both up and down the road, and they are not there. What then -has become of them? May be that they have turned and gone back -again."</p> - -<p>"<i lang="it" xml:lang="it">Diavolo!</i> that would be too provoking," answered César. "It was -unlucky that I lost sight of them as I descended the hill, but it -could not possibly be helped, for the bushes were too thick to see -through."</p> - -<p>"Well, there is sure to be fine spoil to be had out of these rich -English," said the first speaker, "and we must try to get hold of it -somehow. If we fail to find these two by themselves, I suppose we -must do what we thought of at first—manage to upset the carriage at -that sharp corner of the road further on, and attack when all is in -confusion."</p> - -<p>"But what if the carriage should not upset after all?" objected -César; "or what if the driver should carry arms and show fight? Then -perhaps we should be wounded, captured, and shut up again in prison. -Bah! I hate that prison! Have we not been used like dogs there, and -compelled to beat the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maquis</i> near Chiavari for <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">sangliers</i>, when -some English milord wanted a <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">chasse</i>? And is it not an altogether -detestable place? Truly I have no fancy to go there again, and I much -prefer this second plan to the first one that we thought of. We shall -have no danger to fear in dealing with only two women. Let us on no -account be foolhardy, Napoleon."</p> - -<p>"Certainly not," answered Napoleon; "I have no more wish than you -have either to go back to prison or to encounter needless peril! -Still, it will be a pity if we cannot secure the golden prize that -destiny throws in our way. Those two must be somewhere not far off at -this very moment, unless by bad luck they should have turned back -just after you first saw them. Do you think they can have gone off -from the road?" "It is possible," returned César; "anyhow, it is too -soon yet to despair of finding them. Do you, Napoleon, go and watch -on the road, whilst I search the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maquis</i> on each side, first below -and then above. Whichever of us discovers them can summon the other -by a whistle."</p> - -<p>"Good," replied Napoleon. And with that the two men separated and -went off in different directions, as I knew by the rustling of the -bushes.</p> - -<p>Here, then, were two villains in search of Kitty and me, with evil -intentions towards us, and we were quite defenceless. Truly, a -pleasant predicament to be in! What was I to do now?</p> - -<p>Had I been able to reason out at leisure what course a person ought -to pursue in such a situation, I feel sure that my answer to the -above question would have been: Take care of your own safety, keep -out of the men's clutches the best way you can, and do not bother -yourself about any one else. But when the situation actually -occurred, I acted on the impulse of the moment, because there was -no time to think the matter over carefully, and take counsel with -reason. And the consequence of being in such a hurry was, that I did -not behave with that prudent regard to my own interests which was -generally characteristic of me. I was frightened I must candidly -confess, and I desired ardently to be anywhere in security, and to -avoid meeting either Napoleon or César. Yet, strange to say, I was -influenced at that moment by something else than care for myself. My -predominant anxiety—the one object on which my mind was fixed—was, -to get to Kitty as quickly as possible, to warn her of the danger, to -stand by her, to try to save her. It was certainly very unlike -me to have felt like that, and I do not know what occasioned so -extraordinary a departure from my usual sentiments. However, there -the feeling was, and "<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">c'était plus fort que moi</i>." Consequently, I -only waited where I was till the men were far enough off for me to -leave my hiding-place without danger of being discovered, and then -instantly set out to rejoin her. Taking the utmost pains to move -quietly, lest the shaking of the bushes should betray my presence, -I crept through the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maquis</i>. Meanwhile I mentally reviewed the -situation, and considered how we could extricate ourselves from it.</p> - -<p>I inferred, from what the men had said, that they were not particularly -brave, and would probably not venture to attack the carriage if they -found its occupants prepared to receive them. Therefore, if we could -get safely back to our driver and put him on his guard, there would -not be much to fear from the rascals. But then the question was, -<em>could</em> we get back safely? could we, by crawling through bushes, -dodging behind trees, and keeping out of sight as much as possible, -retrace our steps to the carriage unperceived? On the whole, I -thought it was to be managed—provided, of course, that I could -reach Kitty and get her away before either of our enemies had found -her. As they did not know that they were detected, they would expect -to meet us going about carelessly and openly, without the least -attempt at concealment. This was all in our favour, as it would -prevent them from looking for us as closely as they would otherwise -have done. Besides, if they did not find us in that immediate -neighbourhood, they would discontinue the search, under the -impression that we must have returned to the carriage almost directly -after leaving it. Therefore it would be only necessary for us to keep -in hiding till we had got some distance from where we then were; -after that, we could leave the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maquis</i>, and take to the road, where -we should be able to run along at full speed, without troubling to -keep out of sight.</p> - -<p>As I thought of all this, it seemed to me that we had a very -reasonable prospect of escape—unless, by bad luck, I should fail -to get to Kitty before one of the men had found her—everything -appeared to me to depend upon that.</p> - -<p>I had left her on a small open space which jutted out a little from -the hillside, so as to form a sort of diminutive plateau. Great was -my relief, when I came to the edge of this place, to see her still -sketching happily, and evidently without a suspicion of danger. She -glanced towards me for an instant, and then at once resumed her work, -thinking that I was come to fetch her away, and that she must make -the most of every remaining moment. Thus her eyes were upon the -drawing, and so she did not see the gesture which I made to her to be -silent, lest an enemy should be within hearing.</p> - -<p>"Is it time to go, already?" she said, speaking out loud, as it was -natural she should do. "Isn't your watch—"</p> - -<p>By that time I was within reach of her, and stopped further utterance -forcibly by covering her mouth with my hand. Looking up in surprise -and wrath at so unceremonious a proceeding on the part of her maid, -she saw by my face that there was something seriously amiss. I began -to tell her in a whisper, as fast as I could, what was the state of -affairs.</p> - -<p>Unluckily the few words she had spoken had wrought the mischief I -feared, and showed our whereabouts to one of the villains who were -hunting for us. Consequently, I had hardly commenced my hurried -communication in her ear, when a low whistle sounded close by, and -next moment a man with a gun in his hand stepped out of the bushes, -and on to the little plateau where we were. This, then, was no doubt -the rogue named César, whom I had heard undertake to explore the -<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">maquis</i> for us. As I looked at him, I recognised him to be one of -the two men whom I had noticed inquiring about us two or three hours -before, at the inn where the horses had been watered. That at once -made the whole matter clear to me.</p> - -<p>I have already mentioned that the nature of the ground was such as -to enable a pedestrian to travel from point to point as fast as a -carriage could do. Knowing this, César and his companion must have -made up their minds to hurry on in front, and lie in wait for us at -some spot which we had not yet reached, and which they deemed -especially favourable for an attack on the carriage. But on their way -to the place that they had chosen for an ambush, they had evidently -caught sight of Kitty and me leaving the carriage, and been diverted -from their first scheme by the hope of securing the coveted booty -in a less hazardous manner than the one they had originally -contemplated. It was all as plain as a pike-staff to me now.</p> - -<p>César accosted us in French, saying, in the regular beggar's whine, -"Will the ladies have the goodness to give something to a poor man?"</p> - -<p>Though I had not had time fully to explain things to Kitty, she had -picked up enough to know that we were in danger from two escaped -<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">penitenciers</i>, and when she saw César she guessed that he was one -of them.</p> - -<p>This sudden confronting with peril, however, produced in her no -trepidation, sign of cowardice, or inclination to quail. She was too -proud for that. Her compressed lips, flashing eyes, and hard, -resolute, disdainful, undaunted expression, showed a nature that -would set its back to the wall (not that there was one handy on the -present occasion, however), and fight to the last gasp, but would -never flinch an atom, come what might.</p> - -<p>"I have nothing for you," she replied, speaking as haughtily as -though we had been in no way in the man's power.</p> - -<p>"But I feel sure that Madame deceives herself," insisted César, who -apparently did not wish to proceed to extremities till the arrival of -his comrade Napoleon; "if she will have the complaisance to seek, she -will without doubt discover money, a watch, rings, brooches, chains, -or some such little thing that would keep a poor man from dying of -hunger."</p> - -<p>At this point in the conversation, it occurred to me that a good loud -scream for help might be introduced with singular appropriateness; -and I proceeded to put my idea into execution. César, however, was of -a different opinion, and evidently considered the interruption an -untimely one; for no sooner did I uplift my voice, than he aimed his -gun at me, exclaiming savagely, "Silence at once, or I'll kill you!"</p> - -<p>I had no option about obeying this order, because just at that -moment, Napoleon—who was hastening up in obedience to his companion's -summons—came through the bushes behind where I stood, and clapped -his hand roughly over my mouth.</p> - -<p>César grinned mockingly when he saw me thus reduced to silence, and -lowered his gun again.</p> - -<p>"That was an atrocious noise!" he remarked. "Permit me to inform you, -madame—first, that screams cannot assist you, since there is no one -but us within hearing; secondly, that my friend and myself have -inconceivably tender hearts and sensitive nerves. Consequently we -cannot endure the least sound of distress; and if you should -utter another cry in our presence, we should be compelled, most -reluctantly, to cut your throat in order to spare the exquisite -sensibility of our natures. And having given you this caution, let us -return to the more pleasing subject of the little <i class="loanword">souvenirs</i> which -you generous ladies are going to bestow upon us. Will you like us to -save you trouble by helping ourselves to them?"</p> - -<p>Kitty was as composed as though she had been seated in her father's -drawing-room in Eaton Square, and now said to me in English:</p> - -<p>"I'm afraid he's right about there being no one in hearing to help -us, Jill, so it's no good screaming. As resistance is useless, we may -as well give up our purses and trinkets quietly." Then she continued -in French, replying to what the man had said last: "No—you need not -help yourselves. We will hand over to you all we have."</p> - -<p>Accordingly we pulled out our money, and took off the few things of -any value we happened to be wearing—such as watches, chains, and -collar and sleeve studs. These, however, were worth but little, all -put together. People do not take valuable jewellery with them on a -rough driving-tour; and as Mrs. Rollin was our treasurer, Kitty and I -had barely ten francs between us in our purses. The two robbers, -therefore, who had been reckoning confidently on making a large haul, -were greatly dissatisfied and disappointed at the insignificance -of the booty they had secured.</p> - -<p>"This won't do <em>at all</em>," grumbled César; "the idea of capturing a -couple of the rich English, and then not getting more than <em>this</em> out -of them! It is ridiculous! Let us see what is to be done—only first -they must be kept from running away."</p> - -<p>And then, after making fast our hands and feet, they drew a few steps -aside, and proceeded to confer together in a low voice.</p> - -<p>Though they had spoken to us in French, yet in their communications -to one another they used Italian. Noticing this, it occurred to me -that if they were to suppose us both to be ignorant of that tongue, -they would probably talk more freely before us than they would do if -they thought we understood what was said; in this way we might, -perhaps, pick up valuable information; or at least <em>I</em> might—for -Kitty's knowledge of Italian was very limited. I at once imparted my -idea to her, and suggested we should pretend that we understood only -French. I expected she would assent to this as a matter of course; -but, to my surprise, she hesitated, and her face showed that the -proposition was distasteful to her.</p> - -<p>"Well—I don't know," she replied, after a minute's consideration, -"I can't allow a couple of scamps to make me degrade myself by -telling a lie. If they ask me whether I understand them or not, I -shall most certainly tell them the truth."</p> - -<p>I was dismayed at this clinging to principles of scrupulous honour in -dealing with the two rogues who had us in their power. Her sentiments -were very chivalrous and noble, no doubt; but they appeared to me -both uncalled-for and out of place at the present moment, and I -endeavoured to combat them. "Surely," I said, "you don't deny the -truth of the old saying that all is fair in love and war?"</p> - -<p>Her lip curled scornfully as she replied, "That has nothing to do -with it. To my mind a lie would be none the less <em>mean</em> because it -might be <em>fair</em>. I should lose my self-respect if I were to tell -one."</p> - -<p>Even whilst smarting at the reproof which was thus conveyed to me for -having advocated lying, I could not help admiring the indomitable -pride which was unaffected by considerations of expediency, and would -under no circumstances consent to do what was contrary to its sense -of dignity. The hankering after her good opinion which I always felt -made me wonder uneasily what she would think of me if she knew how -many untruths my self-respect had managed to put up with during my -existence. And then I felt half-disgusted with my past conduct, and -it flashed upon me that I had a great mind to turn over a new leaf in -the matter in future, and behave more according to the principles -which she approved of and practised. That, however, should be -reserved for further consideration, as the present was obviously not -a favourable occasion for inaugurating any reform of the kind. Having -arrived at which conclusion, I silently resolved to carry out my plan -for deceiving our captors, if possible, in spite of her objection. -Consequently, when one of them, speaking in Italian, asked which of -us two ladies was the most important one, I affected to be utterly -unconscious of having been addressed. Kitty, fortunately, was seated -farther off from the man than I was, and did not hear what he said, -or discover that he was not still continuing the conversation with -his comrade.</p> - -<p>The man repeated his question a second time in Italian. Finding that -we both remained mute, he asked in French how long it would be before -he had an answer. I hastened to reply to this, speaking quickly and -in a low tone, lest Kitty should hear what I said, and be prompted by -her inconveniently high-flown sentiments to contradict me flatly. I -made believe to be quite astonished to find he had been speaking to -us, and most anxious to deprecate his wrath—assuring him that we -neither of us understood Italian, and begging him to excuse us, -therefore, for the involuntary rudeness of which we had been -guilty in not responding to his question. Luckily my precaution of -speaking indistinctly, and the fact of Kitty's being a few yards -off, prevented her from catching what passed between me and my -interlocutor. The two men then came and stood in front of us, and -Napoleon said in French, "We want to know which of you two ladies is -of the most importance—the chief one?"</p> - -<p>"I am," answered Kitty.</p> - -<p>"Good," he returned; "then it is to you that I will speak. We know -that you cannot be travelling about with no more money than 10 -francs, and that you English are always rolling in gold. It follows, -therefore, that your riches must be in the keeping of that other lady -who stayed with the carriage. Now, those riches we must and will -have, and we propose that you shall earn your liberty by helping us -to get them. Will you do this?"</p> - -<p>"Tell me what you want me to do, first," answered Kitty; "then I will -tell you whether I will do it or not."</p> - -<p>"Very reasonable!" replied Napoleon. "Our plan is this. You must -write to your friend in the carriage such a note as will induce her -to follow the bearer at once, in order to join you. The note will be -entirely in French, and contain not a word of English, so as to make -sure that you say nothing in it that we do not approve of. One of us -will take it to her; then he will conduct her to a safe spot, and -relieve her of the money and trinkets that she has. Should the worth -of these be sufficient to satisfy our just expectations, you will -none of you be detained any longer."</p> - -<p>"And supposing the spoil is less than you anticipate," inquired -Kitty, "what then?"</p> - -<p>"Ah—but that cannot be, I feel sure!" he returned; "our expectations -are most moderate; it cannot be that three ladies would travel about -so far from their own country without having with them as much money -as would satisfy us!"</p> - -<p>"Still I repeat my question," she said; "what would you do if <em>not</em>? -And, in any case, what certainty have I that you would keep your word -and release us afterwards?"</p> - -<p>"If madame will not rely on our word of honour," answered he, smiling -disagreeably, "I fear she will have to content herself without that -certainty which she desires. <em>She</em> is hardly in the position to -enforce any other guarantee of good faith; and <em>we</em> shall not insult -ourselves by assuming such a thing to be necessary. And as for the -quite unlikely event of your friend's purse being insufficient to -meet our wants—why—ahem! when the case arises, it will be then -ample time to settle what is to be done. Here are paper and a pencil. -There is no time to lose. Will madame be so good as to write?"</p> - -<p>Kitty looked at him steadily, without attempting to take the writing -materials he proffered. "And do you suppose, then," she said, "that I -shall consent to bait a trap to bring my aunt to be robbed? If so, -you are very greatly mistaken. And what inducement have you to offer -that should make me do so vile a thing? The mere chance that your -thirst for plunder might then be satiated, and that you might think -fit to set us free! I do not trust to your honour, nor will I do what -you wish. I believe that the plan is merely a <em>ruse</em> to enable you to -secure a fresh victim, and that if you could get my aunt also into -your hands, you would keep us all three prisoners."</p> - -<p>This accusation was met with vehement denials; and our captors -again endeavoured to persuade her to assist them by assuring her it -would be to her advantage to do so, and threatening her with evil -consequences if she persisted in her refusal. Finding, however, that -she remained unmoved by whatever they said, they bethought them that -perhaps <em>I</em> might be made to write such a letter as they required, -and applied to me accordingly. Kitty, on this, gave me peremptory -orders that I was on no account to comply with their request; and I -obeyed her in the matter all the more willingly because I had very -little doubt that her surmise was correct as to the treachery which -the scoundrels had in contemplation.</p> - -<p>But however much Mrs. Rollin might benefit from our refusal to lend -ourselves to their designs, it certainly did not help us in any way. -The two men had made up their minds that they were going to get -enormous spoils out of "these rich English," and had no idea of -resigning their hopes merely because Kitty and I would not aid them -to execute their first scheme. Therefore, when they saw they had no -chance of carrying their point about that, they determined to adopt -another line of action, which was announced to us by César.</p> - -<p>People so unaccommodating and perverse as we were, he said angrily, -deserved to be got rid of altogether; and in such a case as this, -most gentlemen of the road would not be troubled with us any longer, -but cut our throats without ceremony, and so make an end of the -business at once. He and his friend, however, being of so gentle a -disposition as never to resort to violence <em>if it could be helped</em>, -would give us a chance of escape. It was their intention to -communicate with our friends, and offer to restore us uninjured on -payment of a specified sum, which would have to be handed over with -such precautions as would ensure the safety of the recipients. Till -that was received we should reside under their care in the hills. -"But," added the ruffian menacingly, and addressing himself -especially to Kitty, "we cannot wait for ever for the answer, you -know, so we shall tell your friends that if the ransom is not -forthcoming pretty quickly, we shall try to hasten its arrival by -sending some little reminder, such as an ear, a nose, a hand, or a -foot; and of course these souvenirs would, in the first place, be -furnished by you, since you are of more consequence than your -companion. Hers would come later."</p> - -<p>When I heard this I could not repress a shudder at the peril awaiting -my cherished members—though, as those of Kitty were destined to be -sacrificed first, the danger to mine was only a reversionary one. -She, however, who was more immediately threatened than I was, neither -trembled, changed colour, nor gave any other indication of emotion, -but remained as unmoved and haughtily composed as before.</p> - -<p>I did not forget that she had been affected by some feeling too -strong to be concealed when I had suddenly showed her the photograph -of Captain Norroy. And the difference between her demeanour then -and now made me wonder more than ever what the feeling could have -been which had had power to upset the self-command of a person -so high-couraged, strong, and proudly imperturbable as she most -certainly was.</p> - -<p class="centre spaceabove"><small>END OF VOL. I.</small></p> - -<p class="centre spaceabove"><small><i>Printed by</i> <span class="smcap">R. & R. Clark,</span> <i>Edinburgh.</i></small></p> - -<h2>TRANSCRIBER'S NOTE</h2> - -<p class="noindent">Obvious printing errors have been silently corrected throughout. -Otherwise, inconsistencies and possible errors have been preserved.</p> - -<div style='display:block; margin-top:4em'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK JILL ***</div> -<div style='text-align:left'> - -<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> -Updated editions will replace the previous one—the old editions will -be renamed. -</div> - -<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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