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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #62636 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/62636)
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-Project Gutenberg's To the Person Sitting in Darkness, by Mark Twain
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll
-have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using
-this ebook.
-
-
-
-Title: To the Person Sitting in Darkness
-
-Author: Mark Twain
-
-Release Date: July 13, 2020 [EBook #62636]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TO THE PERSON SITTING IN DARKNESS ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by Richard Tonsing and the Online Distributed
-Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This file was
-produced from images generously made available by The
-Internet Archive)
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
- TO THE PERSON SITTING IN DARKNESS
-
-
- BY
-
- MARK TWAIN
-
- REPRINTED BY PERMISSION FROM THE NORTH AMERICAN REVIEW, FEBRUARY, 1901
-
-
-
-
- TO THE PERSON SITTING IN DARKNESS.
-
-BY MARK TWAIN.
-
-
-Extending the Blessings of Civilization to our Brother who Sits in
-Darkness has been a good trade and has paid well, on the whole; and
-there is money in it yet, if carefully worked—but not enough, in my
-judgment, to make any considerable risk advisable. The People that Sit
-in Darkness are getting to be too scarce—too scarce and too shy. And
-such darkness as is now left is really of but an indifferent quality,
-and not dark enough for the game. The most of those People that Sit in
-Darkness have been furnished with more light than was good for them or
-profitable for us. We have been injudicious.
-
-The Blessings-of-Civilization Trust, wisely and cautiously administered,
-is a Daisy. There is more money in it, more territory, more sovereignty
-and other kinds of emolument, than there is in any other game that is
-played. But Christendom has been playing it badly of late years, and
-must certainly suffer by it, in my opinion. She has been so eager to get
-every stake that appeared on the green cloth, that the People who Sit in
-Darkness have noticed it—they have noticed it, and have begun to show
-alarm. They have become suspicious of the Blessings of Civilization.
-More—they have begun to examine them. This is not well. The Blessings of
-Civilization are all right, and a good commercial property; there could
-not be a better, in a dim light. In the right kind of a light, and at a
-proper distance, with the goods a little out of focus, they furnish this
-desirable exhibit to the Gentlemen who Sit in Darkness:
-
-LOVE, JUSTICE, GENTLENESS, CHRISTIANITY, PROTECTION TO THE WEAK,
-TEMPERANCE, LAW AND ORDER, LIBERTY, EQUALITY, HONORABLE DEALING, MERCY,
-EDUCATION,
-
-—and so on.
-
-There. Is it good? Sir, it is pie. It will bring into camp any idiot
-that sits in darkness anywhere. But not if we adulterate it. It is
-proper to be emphatic upon that point. This brand is strictly for
-Export—apparently. Apparently. Privately and confidentially, it is
-nothing of the kind. Privately and confidentially, it is merely an
-outside cover, gay and pretty and attractive, displaying the special
-patterns of our Civilization which we reserve for Home Consumption,
-while inside the bale is the Actual Thing that the Customer Sitting in
-Darkness buys with his blood and tears and land and liberty. That Actual
-Thing is, indeed, Civilization, but it is only for Export. Is there a
-difference between the two brands? In some of the details, yes.
-
-We all know that the Business is being ruined. The reason is not far to
-seek. It is because our Mr. McKinley, and Mr. Chamberlain, and the
-Kaiser, and the Czar, and the French have been exporting the Actual
-Thing with the outside cover left off. This is bad for the Game. It
-shows that these new players of it are not sufficiently acquainted with
-it.
-
-It is a distress to look on and note the mismoves, they are so strange
-and so awkward. Mr. Chamberlain manufactures a war out of materials so
-inadequate and so fanciful that they make the boxes grieve and the
-gallery laugh, and he tries hard to persuade himself that it isn’t
-purely a private raid for cash, but has a sort of dim, vague
-respectability about it somewhere, if he could only find the spot; and
-that, by and by, he can scour the flag clean again after he has finished
-dragging it through the mud, and make it shine and flash in the vault of
-heaven once more as it had shone and flashed there a thousand years in
-the world’s respect until he laid his unfaithful hand upon it. It is bad
-play—bad. For it exposes the Actual Thing to Them that Sit in Darkness,
-and they say: “What! Christian against Christian? And only for money? Is
-this a case of magnanimity, forbearance, love, gentleness, mercy,
-protection of the weak—this strange and over-showy onslaught of an
-elephant upon a nest of field-mice, on the pretext that the mice had
-squeaked an insolence at him—conduct which ‘no self-respecting
-government could allow to pass unavenged?’ as Mr. Chamberlain said. Was
-that a good pretext in a small case, when it had not been a good pretext
-in a large one?—for only recently Russia had affronted the elephant
-three times and survived alive and unsmitten. Is this Civilization and
-Progress? Is it something better than we already possess? These
-harryings and burnings and desert-makings in the Transvaal—is this an
-improvement on our darkness? Is it, perhaps, possible that there are two
-kinds of Civilization—one for home consumption and one for the heathen
-market?”
-
-Then They that Sit in Darkness are troubled, and shake their heads; and
-they read this extract from a letter of a British private, recounting
-his exploits in one of Methuen’s victories, some days before the affair
-of Magersfontein, and they are troubled again:
-
- “We tore up the hill and into the intrenchments, and the Boers saw
- we had them; so they dropped their guns and went down on their knees
- and put up their hands clasped, and begged for mercy. And we gave it
- them—_with the long spoon_.”
-
-The long spoon is the bayonet. See _Lloyd’s Weekly_, London, of those
-days. The same number—and the same column—contains some quite
-unconscious satire in the form of shocked and bitter upbraidings of the
-Boers for their brutalities and inhumanities!
-
-Next to our heavy damage, the Kaiser went to playing the game without
-first mastering it. He lost a couple of missionaries in a riot in
-Shantung, and in his account he made an overcharge for them. China had
-to pay a hundred thousand dollars apiece for them, in money; twelve
-miles of territory, containing several millions of inhabitants and worth
-twenty million dollars, and to build a monument and also a Christian
-Church; whereas the people of China could have been depended upon to
-remember the missionaries without the help of these expensive memorials.
-This was all bad play. Bad, because it would not, and could not, and
-will not now or ever, deceive the Person Sitting in Darkness. He knows
-that it was an overcharge. He knows that a missionary is like any other
-man; he is worth merely what you can supply his place for, and no more.
-He is useful, but so is a doctor, so is a sheriff, so is an editor; but
-a just Emperor does not charge war-prices for such. A diligent,
-intelligent, but obscure missionary, and a diligent, intelligent country
-editor are worth much, and we know it; but they are not worth the earth.
-We esteem such an editor, and we are sorry to see him go; but, when he
-goes, we should consider twelve miles of territory, and a church, and a
-fortune, over-compensation for his loss. I mean, if he was a Chinese
-editor, and we had to settle for him. It is no proper figure for an
-editor or a missionary; one can get shop-worn kings for less. It was bad
-play on the Kaiser’s part. It got this property, true; but it _produced
-the Chinese revolt_, the indignant uprising of China’s traduced
-patriots, the Boxers. The results have been expensive to Germany, and to
-the other Disseminators of Progress and the Blessings of Civilization.
-
-The Kaiser’s claim was paid, yet it was bad play, for it could not fail
-to have an evil effect upon Persons Sitting in Darkness in China. They
-would muse upon the event, and be likely to say: “Civilization is
-gracious and beautiful, for such is its reputation; but can we afford
-it? There are rich Chinamen, perhaps they could afford it; but this tax
-is not laid upon them, it is laid upon the peasants of Shantung; it is
-they that must pay this mighty sum, and their wages are but four cents a
-day. Is this a better civilization than ours, and holier and higher and
-nobler? Is not this rapacity? Is not this extortion? Would Germany
-charge America two hundred thousand dollars for two missionaries, and
-shake the mailed fist in her face, and send warships, and send soldiers,
-and say: ‘Seize twelve miles of territory, worth twenty millions of
-dollars, as additional pay for the missionaries; and make those peasants
-build a monument to the missionaries, and a costly Christian church to
-remember them by?’ And later would Germany say to her soldiers: ‘March
-through America and slay, _giving no quarter_; make the German face
-there, as has been our Hun-face here, a terror for a thousand years;
-march through the Great Republic and slay, slay, slay, carving a road
-for our offended religion through its heart and bowels?’ Would Germany
-do like this to America, to England, to France, to Russia? Or only to
-China the helpless—imitating the elephant’s assault upon the field-mice?
-Had we better invest in this Civilization—this Civilization which called
-Napoleon a buccaneer for carrying off Venice’s bronze horses, but which
-steals our ancient astronomical instruments from our walls, and goes
-looting like common bandits—that is, all the alien soldiers except
-America’s; and (Americans again excepted) storms frightened villages and
-cables the result to glad journals at home every day: ‘Chinese losses,
-450 killed; ours, _one officer and two men wounded_. Shall proceed
-against neighboring village to-morrow, where a _massacre_ is reported.’
-Can we afford Civilization?”
-
-And, next, Russia must go and play the game injudiciously. She affronts
-England once or twice—with the Person Sitting in Darkness observing and
-noting; by moral assistance of France and Germany, she robs Japan of her
-hard-earned spoil, all swimming in Chinese blood—Port Arthur—with the
-Person again observing and noting; then she seizes Manchuria, raids its
-villages, and chokes its great rivers with the swollen corpses of
-countless massacred peasants—that astonished Person still observing and
-noting. And perhaps he is saying to himself: “It is yet _another_
-Civilized Power, with its banner of the Prince of Peace in one hand and
-its loot-basket and its butcher-knife in the other. Is there no
-salvation for us but to adopt Civilization and lift ourselves down to
-its level?”
-
-And by and by comes America, and our Master of the Game plays it
-badly—plays it as Mr. Chamberlain was playing it in South Africa. It was
-a mistake to do that; also, it was one which was quite unlooked for in a
-Master who was playing it so well in Cuba. In Cuba, he was playing the
-usual and regular _American_ game, and it was winning, for there is no
-way to beat it. The Master, contemplating Cuba, said: “Here is an
-oppressed and friendless little nation which is willing to fight to be
-free; we go partners, and put up the strength of seventy million
-sympathizers, and the resources of the United States: play!” Nothing but
-Europe combined could call that hand: and Europe cannot combine on
-anything. There, in Cuba, he was following our great traditions in a way
-which made us very proud of him, and proud of the deep dissatisfaction
-which his play was provoking in Continental Europe. Moved by a high
-inspiration, he threw out those stirring words which proclaimed that
-forcible annexation would be “criminal aggression;” and in that
-utterance fired another “shot heard round the world.” The memory of that
-fine saying will be outlived by the remembrance of no act of his but
-one—that he forgot it within the twelvemonth, and its honorable gospel
-along with it.
-
-For, presently, came the Philippine temptation. It was strong; it was
-too strong, and he made that bad mistake: he played the European game,
-the Chamberlain game. It was a pity; it was a great pity, that error;
-that one grievous error, that irrevocable error. For it was the very
-place and time to play the American game again. And at no cost. Rich
-winnings to be gathered in, too; rich and permanent; indestructible; a
-fortune transmissible forever to the children of the flag. Not land, not
-money, not dominion—no, something worth many times more than that dross:
-our share, the spectacle of a nation of long harassed and persecuted
-slaves set free through our influence; our posterity’s share, the golden
-memory of that fair deed. The game was in our hands. If it had been
-played according to the American rules, Dewey would have sailed away
-from Manila as soon as he had destroyed the Spanish fleet—after putting
-up a sign on shore guaranteeing foreign property and life against damage
-by the Filipinos, and warning the Powers that interference with the
-emancipated patriots would be regarded as an act unfriendly to the
-United States. The Powers cannot combine, in even a bad cause, and the
-sign would not have been molested.
-
-Dewey could have gone about his affairs elsewhere, and left the
-competent Filipino army to starve out the little Spanish garrison and
-send it home, and the Filipino citizens to set up the form of government
-they might prefer, and deal with the friars and their doubtful
-acquisitions according to Filipino ideas of fairness and justice—ideas
-which have since been tested and found to be of as high an order as any
-that prevail in Europe or America.
-
-But we played the Chamberlain game, and lost the chance to add another
-Cuba and another honorable deed to our good record.
-
-The more we examine the mistake, the more clearly we perceive that it is
-going to be bad for the Business. The Person Sitting in Darkness is
-almost sure to say: “There is something curious about this—curious and
-unaccountable. There must be two Americas: one that sets the captive
-free, and one that takes a once-captive’s new freedom away from him, and
-picks a quarrel with him with nothing to found it on; then kills him to
-get his land.”
-
-The truth is, the Person Sitting in Darkness is saying things like that;
-and for the sake of the Business we must persuade him to look at the
-Philippine matter in another and healthier way. We must arrange his
-opinions for him. I believe it can be done; for Mr. Chamberlain has
-arranged England’s opinion of the South African matter, and done it most
-cleverly and successfully. He presented the facts—some of the facts—and
-showed those confiding people what the facts meant. He did it
-statistically, which is a good way. He used the formula: “Twice 2 are
-14, and 2 from 9 leaves 35.” Figures are effective; figures will
-convince the elect.
-
-Now, my plan is a still bolder one than Mr. Chamberlain’s, though
-apparently a copy of it. Let us be franker than Mr. Chamberlain; let us
-audaciously present the whole of the facts, shirking none, then explain
-them according to Mr. Chamberlain’s formula. This daring truthfulness
-will astonish and dazzle the Person Sitting in Darkness, and he will
-take the Explanation down before his mental vision has had time to get
-back into focus. Let us say to him:
-
-“Our case is simple. On the 1st of May, Dewey destroyed the Spanish
-fleet. This left the Archipelago in the hands of its proper and rightful
-owners, the Filipino nation. Their army numbered 30,000 men, and they
-were competent to whip out or starve out the little Spanish garrison;
-then the people could set up a government of their own devising. Our
-traditions required that Dewey should now set up his warning sign, and
-go away. But the Master of the Game happened to think of another
-plan—the European plan. He acted upon it. This was, to send out an
-army—ostensibly to help the native patriots put the finishing touch upon
-their long and plucky struggle for independence, but really to take
-their land away from them and keep it. That is, in the interest of
-Progress and Civilization. The plan developed, stage by stage, and quite
-satisfactorily. We entered into a military alliance with the trusting
-Filipinos, and they hemmed in Manila on the land side, and by their
-valuable help the place, with its garrison of 8,000 or 10,000 Spaniards,
-was captured—a thing which we could not have accomplished unaided at
-that time. We got their help by—by ingenuity. We knew they were fighting
-for their independence, and that they had been at it for two years. We
-knew they supposed that we also were fighting in their worthy cause—just
-as we had helped the Cubans fight for Cuban independence—and we allowed
-them to go on thinking so. _Until Manila was ours and we could get along
-without them._ Then we showed our hand. Of course, they were
-surprised—that was natural; surprised and disappointed; disappointed and
-grieved. To them it looked un-American; un-characteristic; foreign to
-our established traditions. And this was natural, too; for we were only
-playing the American Game in public—in private it was the European. It
-was neatly done, very neatly, and it bewildered them so they could not
-understand it; for we had been so friendly—so affectionate, even—with
-those simple-minded patriots! We, our own selves, had brought back
-out of exile their leader, their hero, their hope, their
-Washington—Aguinaldo; brought him in a warship, in high honor, under the
-sacred shelter and hospitality of the flag; brought him back and
-restored him to his people, and got their moving and eloquent gratitude
-for it. Yes, we had been so friendly to them, and had heartened them up
-in so many ways! We had lent them guns and ammunition; advised with
-them; exchanged pleasant courtesies with them; placed our sick and
-wounded in their kindly care; entrusted our Spanish prisoners to their
-humane and honest hands; fought shoulder to shoulder with them against
-“the common enemy” (our own phrase); praised their courage, praised
-their gallantry, praised their mercifulness, praised their fine and
-honorable conduct; borrowed their trenches, borrowed strong positions
-which they had previously captured from the Spaniards; petted them, lied
-to them—officially proclaiming that our land and naval forces came to
-give them their freedom and displace the bad Spanish Government—fooled
-them, used them until we needed them no longer; then derided the sucked
-orange and threw it away. We kept the positions which we had beguiled
-them of; by and by, we moved a force forward and overlapped patriot
-ground—a clever thought, for we needed trouble, and this would produce
-it. A Filipino soldier, crossing the ground, where no one had a right to
-forbid him, was shot by our sentry. The badgered patriots resented this
-with arms, without waiting to know whether Aguinaldo, who was absent,
-would approve or not. Aguinaldo did not approve; but that availed
-nothing. What we wanted, in the interest of Progress and Civilization,
-was the Archipelago, unencumbered by patriots struggling for
-independence; and the War was what we needed. We clinched our
-opportunity. It is Mr. Chamberlain’s case over again—at least in its
-motive and intention; and we played the game as adroitly as he played it
-himself.”
-
-At this point in our frank statement of fact to the Person Sitting in
-Darkness, we should throw in a little trade-taffy about the Blessings of
-Civilization—for a change, and for the refreshment of his spirit—then go
-on with our tale:
-
-“We and the patriots having captured Manila, Spain’s ownership
-of the Archipelago and her sovereignty over it were at an
-end—obliterated—annihilated—not a rag or shred of either remaining
-behind. It was then that we conceived the divinely humorous idea of
-_buying_ both of these spectres from Spain! [It is quite safe to confess
-this to the Person Sitting in Darkness, since neither he nor any other
-sane person will believe it.] In buying those ghosts for twenty
-millions, we also contracted to take care of the friars and their
-accumulations. I think we also agreed to propagate leprosy and smallpox,
-but as to this there is doubt. But it is not important; persons
-afflicted with the friars do not mind the other diseases.
-
-“With our treaty ratified, Manila subdued, and our Ghosts secured, we
-had no further use for Aguinaldo and the owners of the Archipelago. We
-forced a war, and we have been hunting America’s guest and ally through
-the woods and swamps ever since.”
-
-At this point in the tale, it will be well to boast a little of our
-war-work and our heroisms in the field, so as to make our performance
-look as fine as England’s in South Africa; but I believe it will not be
-best to emphasize this too much. We must be cautious. Of course, we must
-read the war-telegrams to the Person, in order to keep up our frankness;
-but we can throw an air of humorousness over them, and that will modify
-their grim eloquence a little, and their rather indiscreet exhibitions
-of gory exultation. Before reading to him the following display heads of
-the dispatches of November 18, 1900, it will be well to practice on them
-in private first, so as to get the right tang of lightness and gaiety
-into them:
-
- “ADMINISTRATION WEARY OF PROTRACTED HOSTILITIES!”
-
- “REAL WAR AHEAD FOR FILIPINO REBELS!”[1]
-
- “WILL SHOW NO MERCY!”
-
- “KITCHENER’S PLAN ADOPTED!”
-
-Footnote 1:
-
- “Rebels!” Mumble that funny word—don’t let the Person catch it
- distinctly.
-
-Kitchener knows how to handle disagreeable people who are fighting for
-their homes and their liberties, and we must let on that we are merely
-imitating Kitchener, and have no national interest in the matter,
-further than to get ourselves admired by the Great Family of Nations, in
-which august company our Master of the Game has bought a place for us in
-the back row.
-
-Of course, we must not venture to ignore our General MacArthur’s
-reports—oh, why do they keep on printing those embarrassing things?—we
-must drop them trippingly from the tongue and take the chances:
-
-“During the last ten months our losses have been 268 killed and 750
-wounded; Filipino loss, _three thousand two hundred and twenty-seven
-killed_, and 694 wounded.”
-
-We must stand ready to grab the Person Sitting in Darkness, for he will
-swoon away at this confession, saying: “Good God, those ‘niggers’ spare
-their wounded, and the Americans massacre theirs!”
-
-We must bring him to, and coax him and coddle him, and assure him that
-the ways of Providence are best, and that it would not become us to find
-fault with them; and then, to show him that we are only imitators, not
-originators, we must read the following passage from the letter of an
-American soldier-lad in the Philippines to his mother, published in
-_Public Opinion_, of Decorah, Iowa, describing the finish of a
-victorious battle:
-
-“WE NEVER LEFT ONE ALIVE. IF ONE WAS WOUNDED, WE WOULD RUN OUR BAYONETS
-THROUGH HIM.”
-
-Having now laid all the historical facts before the Person Sitting in
-Darkness, we should bring him to again, and explain them to him. We
-should say to him:
-
-“They look doubtful, but in reality they are not. There have been
-lies; yes, but they were told in a good cause. We have been
-treacherous; but that was only in order that real good might come out
-of apparent evil. True, we have crushed a deceived and confiding
-people; we have turned against the weak and the friendless who trusted
-us; we have stamped out a just and intelligent and well-ordered
-republic; we have stabbed an ally in the back and slapped the face of
-a guest; we have bought a Shadow from an enemy that hadn’t it to sell;
-we have robbed a trusting friend of his land and his liberty; we have
-invited our clean young men to shoulder a discredited musket and do
-bandit’s work under a flag which bandits have been accustomed to fear,
-not to follow; we have debauched America’s honor and blackened her
-face before the world; but each detail was for the best. We know this.
-The Head of every State and Sovereignty in Christendom and ninety per
-cent. of every legislative body in Christendom, including our Congress
-and our fifty State Legislatures, are members not only of the church,
-but also of the Blessings-of-Civilization Trust. This world-girdling
-accumulation of trained morals, high principles, and justice, cannot
-do an unright thing, an unfair thing, an ungenerous thing, an unclean
-thing. It knows what it is about. Give yourself no uneasiness; it is
-all right.”
-
-Now then, that will convince the Person. You will see. It will restore
-the Business. Also, it will elect the Master of the Game to the vacant
-place in the Trinity of our national gods; and there on their high
-thrones the Three will sit, age after age, in the people’s sight, each
-bearing the Emblem of his service: Washington, the Sword of the
-Liberator; Lincoln, the Slave’s Broken Chains; the Master, the Chains
-Repaired.
-
-It will give the Business a splendid new start. You will see.
-
-Everything is prosperous, now; everything is just as we should wish it.
-We have got the Archipelago, and we shall never give it up. Also, we
-have every reason to hope that we shall have an opportunity before very
-long to slip out of our Congressional contract with Cuba and give her
-something better in the place of it. It is a rich country, and many of
-us are already beginning to see that the contract was a sentimental
-mistake. But now—right now—is the best time to do some profitable
-rehabilitating work—work that will set us up and make us comfortable,
-and discourage gossip. We cannot conceal from ourselves that, privately,
-we are a little troubled about our uniform. It is one of our prides; it
-is acquainted with honor; it is familiar with great deeds and noble; we
-love it, we revere it; and so this errand it is on makes us uneasy. And
-our flag—another pride of ours, our chiefest! We have worshipped it so;
-and when we have seen it in far lands—glimpsing it unexpectedly in that
-strange sky, waving its welcome and benediction to us—we have caught our
-breath and uncovered our heads, and couldn’t speak, for a moment, for
-the thought of what it was to us and the great ideals it stood for.
-Indeed, we _must_ do something about these things: we must not have the
-flag out there, and the uniform. They are not needed there; we can
-manage in some other way. England manages, as regards the uniform, and
-so can we. We have to send soldiers—we can’t get out of that—but we can
-disguise them. It is the way England does in South Africa. Even Mr.
-Chamberlain himself takes pride in England’s honorable uniform, and
-makes the army down there wear an ugly and odious and appropriate
-disguise, of yellow stuff such as quarantine flags are made of, and
-which are hoisted to warn the healthy away from unclean disease and
-repulsive death. This cloth is called khaki. We could adopt it. It is
-light, comfortable, grotesque, and deceives the enemy, for he cannot
-conceive of a soldier being concealed in it.
-
-And as for a flag for the Philippine Province, it is easily managed. We
-can have a special one—our States do it: we can have just our usual
-flag, with the white stripes painted black and the stars replaced by the
-skull and cross-bones.
-
-And we do not need that Civil Commission out there. Having no powers, it
-has to invent them, and that kind of work cannot be effectively done by
-just anybody; an expert is required. Mr. Croker can be spared. We do not
-want the United States represented there, but only the Game.
-
-By help of these suggested amendments, Progress and Civilization in that
-country can have a boom, and it will take in the Persons who are Sitting
-in Darkness, and we can resume Business at the old stand.
-
- MARK TWAIN.
-
-
- * * * * *
-
-For copies, address the Anti-Imperialist League of New York, 150 Nassau
-St., Room 1520. Please enclose postage.
-
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
-
-
-
- TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES
-
-
- 1. Silently corrected typographical errors and variations in spelling.
- 2. Archaic, non-standard, and uncertain spellings retained as printed.
- 3. Enclosed italics font in _underscores_.
-
-
-
-
-
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-Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This file was
-produced from images generously made available by The
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-</pre>
-
-
-<div class='tnotes covernote'>
-
-<p class='c000'><b>Transcriber’s Note:</b></p>
-
-<p class='c000'>The cover image was created by the transcriber and is placed in the public domain.</p>
-
-</div>
-
-<div class='titlepage'>
-
-<div>
- <h1 class='c001'>TO THE PERSON SITTING IN DARKNESS</h1>
-</div>
-
-<div class='nf-center-c0'>
-<div class='nf-center c002'>
- <div>BY</div>
- <div class='c003'><span class='xlarge'>MARK TWAIN</span></div>
- <div class='c003'>REPRINTED BY PERMISSION FROM THE NORTH AMERICAN REVIEW, FEBRUARY, 1901</div>
- </div>
-</div>
-
-</div>
-
-<div class='chapter'>
- <span class='pageno' id='Page_2'>2</span>
- <h2 class='c004'>TO THE PERSON SITTING IN DARKNESS.</h2>
-</div>
-
-<p class='c005'>BY MARK TWAIN.</p>
-
-<p class='c005'>Extending the Blessings of Civilization to our
-Brother who Sits in Darkness has been a good
-trade and has paid well, on the whole; and there is
-money in it yet, if carefully worked—but not
-enough, in my judgment, to make any considerable
-risk advisable. The People that Sit in Darkness
-are getting to be too scarce—too scarce and too
-shy. And such darkness as is now left is really of
-but an indifferent quality, and not dark enough for
-the game. The most of those People that Sit in
-Darkness have been furnished with more light than
-was good for them or profitable for us. We have
-been injudicious.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>The Blessings-of-Civilization Trust, wisely and
-cautiously administered, is a Daisy. There is more
-money in it, more territory, more sovereignty and
-other kinds of emolument, than there is in any other
-game that is played. But Christendom has been
-playing it badly of late years, and must certainly
-suffer by it, in my opinion. She has been so eager
-to get every stake that appeared on the green cloth,
-that the People who Sit in Darkness have noticed
-it—they have noticed it, and have begun to show
-alarm. They have become suspicious of the Blessings
-of Civilization. More—they have begun to
-examine them. This is not well. The Blessings
-of Civilization are all right, and a good commercial
-property; there could not be a better, in a dim light.
-In the right kind of a light, and at a proper distance,
-with the goods a little out of focus, they furnish
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_3'>3</span>this desirable exhibit to the Gentlemen who Sit
-in Darkness:</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>LOVE,
-JUSTICE,
-GENTLENESS,
-CHRISTIANITY,
-PROTECTION TO THE
-WEAK,
-TEMPERANCE,
-LAW AND ORDER,
-LIBERTY,
-EQUALITY,
-HONORABLE DEALING,
-MERCY,
-EDUCATION,</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>—and so on.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>There. Is it good? Sir, it is pie. It will bring
-into camp any idiot that sits in darkness anywhere.
-But not if we adulterate it. It is proper to be emphatic
-upon that point. This brand is strictly for
-Export—apparently. Apparently. Privately and
-confidentially, it is nothing of the kind. Privately
-and confidentially, it is merely an outside cover,
-gay and pretty and attractive, displaying the special
-patterns of our Civilization which we reserve for
-Home Consumption, while inside the bale is the
-Actual Thing that the Customer Sitting in Darkness
-buys with his blood and tears and land and
-liberty. That Actual Thing is, indeed, Civilization,
-but it is only for Export. Is there a difference between
-the two brands? In some of the details, yes.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>We all know that the Business is being ruined.
-The reason is not far to seek. It is because our
-Mr. McKinley, and Mr. Chamberlain, and the
-Kaiser, and the Czar, and the French have been
-exporting the Actual Thing with the outside cover
-left off. This is bad for the Game. It shows that
-these new players of it are not sufficiently acquainted
-with it.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>It is a distress to look on and note the mismoves,
-they are so strange and so awkward. Mr. Chamberlain
-manufactures a war out of materials so inadequate
-and so fanciful that they make the boxes
-grieve and the gallery laugh, and he tries hard to
-persuade himself that it isn’t purely a private raid
-for cash, but has a sort of dim, vague respectability
-about it somewhere, if he could only find the spot;
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_4'>4</span>and that, by and by, he can scour the flag clean
-again after he has finished dragging it through the
-mud, and make it shine and flash in the vault of
-heaven once more as it had shone and flashed there
-a thousand years in the world’s respect until he
-laid his unfaithful hand upon it. It is bad play—bad.
-For it exposes the Actual Thing to Them that
-Sit in Darkness, and they say: “What! Christian
-against Christian? And only for money? Is this
-a case of magnanimity, forbearance, love, gentleness,
-mercy, protection of the weak—this strange
-and over-showy onslaught of an elephant upon a
-nest of field-mice, on the pretext that the mice had
-squeaked an insolence at him—conduct which ‘no
-self-respecting government could allow to pass unavenged?’
-as Mr. Chamberlain said. Was that a
-good pretext in a small case, when it had not been
-a good pretext in a large one?—for only recently
-Russia had affronted the elephant three times and
-survived alive and unsmitten. Is this Civilization
-and Progress? Is it something better than we already
-possess? These harryings and burnings and
-desert-makings in the Transvaal—is this an improvement
-on our darkness? Is it, perhaps, possible
-that there are two kinds of Civilization—one for
-home consumption and one for the heathen
-market?”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>Then They that Sit in Darkness are troubled,
-and shake their heads; and they read this extract
-from a letter of a British private, recounting his exploits
-in one of Methuen’s victories, some days
-before the affair of Magersfontein, and they are
-troubled again:</p>
-
-<p class='c007'>“We tore up the hill and into the intrenchments,
-and the Boers saw we had them; so they dropped their
-guns and went down on their knees and put up their
-hands clasped, and begged for mercy. And we gave it
-them—<i>with the long spoon</i>.”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>The long spoon is the bayonet. See <cite>Lloyd’s
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_5'>5</span>Weekly</cite>, London, of those days. The same number—and
-the same column—contains some quite unconscious
-satire in the form of shocked and bitter
-upbraidings of the Boers for their brutalities and
-inhumanities!</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>Next to our heavy damage, the Kaiser went to
-playing the game without first mastering it. He
-lost a couple of missionaries in a riot in Shantung,
-and in his account he made an overcharge for them.
-China had to pay a hundred thousand dollars apiece
-for them, in money; twelve miles of territory, containing
-several millions of inhabitants and worth
-twenty million dollars, and to build a monument and
-also a Christian Church; whereas the people of China
-could have been depended upon to remember the
-missionaries without the help of these expensive
-memorials. This was all bad play. Bad, because
-it would not, and could not, and will not now or
-ever, deceive the Person Sitting in Darkness. He
-knows that it was an overcharge. He knows that
-a missionary is like any other man; he is worth
-merely what you can supply his place for, and no
-more. He is useful, but so is a doctor, so is a
-sheriff, so is an editor; but a just Emperor does
-not charge war-prices for such. A diligent, intelligent,
-but obscure missionary, and a diligent, intelligent
-country editor are worth much, and we know
-it; but they are not worth the earth. We esteem
-such an editor, and we are sorry to see him go; but,
-when he goes, we should consider twelve miles of
-territory, and a church, and a fortune, over-compensation
-for his loss. I mean, if he was a Chinese
-editor, and we had to settle for him. It is no proper
-figure for an editor or a missionary; one can get
-shop-worn kings for less. It was bad play on the
-Kaiser’s part. It got this property, true; but it
-<i>produced the Chinese revolt</i>, the indignant uprising of
-China’s traduced patriots, the Boxers. The results
-have been expensive to Germany, and to the other
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_6'>6</span>Disseminators of Progress and the Blessings of
-Civilization.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>The Kaiser’s claim was paid, yet it was bad play,
-for it could not fail to have an evil effect upon Persons
-Sitting in Darkness in China. They would
-muse upon the event, and be likely to say: “Civilization
-is gracious and beautiful, for such is its reputation;
-but can we afford it? There are rich Chinamen,
-perhaps they could afford it; but this tax is not
-laid upon them, it is laid upon the peasants of Shantung;
-it is they that must pay this mighty sum, and
-their wages are but four cents a day. Is this a
-better civilization than ours, and holier and higher
-and nobler? Is not this rapacity? Is not this extortion?
-Would Germany charge America two
-hundred thousand dollars for two missionaries, and
-shake the mailed fist in her face, and send warships,
-and send soldiers, and say: ‘Seize twelve miles of
-territory, worth twenty millions of dollars, as additional
-pay for the missionaries; and make those
-peasants build a monument to the missionaries, and
-a costly Christian church to remember them by?’
-And later would Germany say to her soldiers:
-‘March through America and slay, <i>giving no
-quarter</i>; make the German face there, as has been
-our Hun-face here, a terror for a thousand years;
-march through the Great Republic and slay, slay,
-slay, carving a road for our offended religion
-through its heart and bowels?’ Would Germany do
-like this to America, to England, to France, to
-Russia? Or only to China the helpless—imitating
-the elephant’s assault upon the field-mice? Had we
-better invest in this Civilization—this Civilization
-which called Napoleon a buccaneer for carrying off
-Venice’s bronze horses, but which steals our ancient
-astronomical instruments from our walls, and goes
-looting like common bandits—that is, all the alien
-soldiers except America’s; and (Americans again
-excepted) storms frightened villages and cables the
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_7'>7</span>result to glad journals at home every day: ‘Chinese
-losses, 450 killed; ours, <i>one officer and two men
-wounded</i>. Shall proceed against neighboring village
-to-morrow, where a <i>massacre</i> is reported.’ Can
-we afford Civilization?”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>And, next, Russia must go and play the game
-injudiciously. She affronts England once or twice—with
-the Person Sitting in Darkness observing
-and noting; by moral assistance of France and
-Germany, she robs Japan of her hard-earned spoil,
-all swimming in Chinese blood—Port Arthur—with
-the Person again observing and noting; then she
-seizes Manchuria, raids its villages, and chokes its
-great rivers with the swollen corpses of countless
-massacred peasants—that astonished Person still
-observing and noting. And perhaps he is saying
-to himself: “It is yet <i>another</i> Civilized Power, with
-its banner of the Prince of Peace in one hand and its
-loot-basket and its butcher-knife in the other. Is
-there no salvation for us but to adopt Civilization
-and lift ourselves down to its level?”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>And by and by comes America, and our Master
-of the Game plays it badly—plays it as Mr. Chamberlain
-was playing it in South Africa. It was a
-mistake to do that; also, it was one which was
-quite unlooked for in a Master who was playing it
-so well in Cuba. In Cuba, he was playing the usual
-and regular <i>American</i> game, and it was winning, for
-there is no way to beat it. The Master, contemplating
-Cuba, said: “Here is an oppressed and
-friendless little nation which is willing to fight to be
-free; we go partners, and put up the strength of seventy
-million sympathizers, and the resources of the
-United States: play!” Nothing but Europe combined
-could call that hand: and Europe cannot combine
-on anything. There, in Cuba, he was following
-our great traditions in a way which made us very
-proud of him, and proud of the deep dissatisfaction
-which his play was provoking in Continental Europe.
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_8'>8</span>Moved by a high inspiration, he threw out
-those stirring words which proclaimed that forcible
-annexation would be “criminal aggression;” and in
-that utterance fired another “shot heard round the
-world.” The memory of that fine saying will be
-outlived by the remembrance of no act of his but
-one—that he forgot it within the twelvemonth, and
-its honorable gospel along with it.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>For, presently, came the Philippine temptation.
-It was strong; it was too strong, and he made that
-bad mistake: he played the European game, the
-Chamberlain game. It was a pity; it was a great
-pity, that error; that one grievous error, that irrevocable
-error. For it was the very place and time to
-play the American game again. And at no cost.
-Rich winnings to be gathered in, too; rich and permanent;
-indestructible; a fortune transmissible forever
-to the children of the flag. Not land, not
-money, not dominion—no, something worth many
-times more than that dross: our share, the spectacle
-of a nation of long harassed and persecuted slaves
-set free through our influence; our posterity’s share,
-the golden memory of that fair deed. The game
-was in our hands. If it had been played according
-to the American rules, Dewey would have sailed
-away from Manila as soon as he had destroyed the
-Spanish fleet—after putting up a sign on shore
-guaranteeing foreign property and life against damage
-by the Filipinos, and warning the Powers that
-interference with the emancipated patriots would
-be regarded as an act unfriendly to the United
-States. The Powers cannot combine, in even a bad
-cause, and the sign would not have been molested.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>Dewey could have gone about his affairs elsewhere,
-and left the competent Filipino army to
-starve out the little Spanish garrison and send it
-home, and the Filipino citizens to set up the form
-of government they might prefer, and deal with the
-friars and their doubtful acquisitions according to
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_9'>9</span>Filipino ideas of fairness and justice—ideas which
-have since been tested and found to be of as high an
-order as any that prevail in Europe or America.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>But we played the Chamberlain game, and lost
-the chance to add another Cuba and another honorable
-deed to our good record.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>The more we examine the mistake, the more
-clearly we perceive that it is going to be bad for
-the Business. The Person Sitting in Darkness is
-almost sure to say: “There is something curious
-about this—curious and unaccountable. There
-must be two Americas: one that sets the captive
-free, and one that takes a once-captive’s new freedom
-away from him, and picks a quarrel with him
-with nothing to found it on; then kills him to get his
-land.”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>The truth is, the Person Sitting in Darkness is
-saying things like that; and for the sake of the Business
-we must persuade him to look at the Philippine
-matter in another and healthier way. We must
-arrange his opinions for him. I believe it can be
-done; for Mr. Chamberlain has arranged England’s
-opinion of the South African matter, and done it
-most cleverly and successfully. He presented the
-facts—some of the facts—and showed those confiding
-people what the facts meant. He did it statistically,
-which is a good way. He used the formula:
-“Twice 2 are 14, and 2 from 9 leaves 35.” Figures
-are effective; figures will convince the elect.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>Now, my plan is a still bolder one than Mr.
-Chamberlain’s, though apparently a copy of it. Let
-us be franker than Mr. Chamberlain; let us audaciously
-present the whole of the facts, shirking none,
-then explain them according to Mr. Chamberlain’s
-formula. This daring truthfulness will astonish and
-dazzle the Person Sitting in Darkness, and he will
-take the Explanation down before his mental vision
-has had time to get back into focus. Let us say to
-him:</p>
-
-<p class='c006'><span class='pageno' id='Page_10'>10</span>“Our case is simple. On the 1st of May, Dewey
-destroyed the Spanish fleet. This left the Archipelago
-in the hands of its proper and rightful owners,
-the Filipino nation. Their army numbered 30,000
-men, and they were competent to whip out or
-starve out the little Spanish garrison; then the
-people could set up a government of their own
-devising. Our traditions required that Dewey
-should now set up his warning sign, and go away.
-But the Master of the Game happened to think of
-another plan—the European plan. He acted upon
-it. This was, to send out an army—ostensibly to
-help the native patriots put the finishing touch upon
-their long and plucky struggle for independence,
-but really to take their land away from them and
-keep it. That is, in the interest of Progress and
-Civilization. The plan developed, stage by stage,
-and quite satisfactorily. We entered into a military
-alliance with the trusting Filipinos, and they
-hemmed in Manila on the land side, and by their
-valuable help the place, with its garrison of 8,000
-or 10,000 Spaniards, was captured—a thing which
-we could not have accomplished unaided at that
-time. We got their help by—by ingenuity. We
-knew they were fighting for their independence, and
-that they had been at it for two years. We knew
-they supposed that we also were fighting in their
-worthy cause—just as we had helped the Cubans
-fight for Cuban independence—and we allowed
-them to go on thinking so. <i>Until Manila was ours
-and we could get along without them.</i> Then we
-showed our hand. Of course, they were surprised—that
-was natural; surprised and disappointed;
-disappointed and grieved. To them it looked un-American;
-un-characteristic; foreign to our established
-traditions. And this was natural, too; for we
-were only playing the American Game in public—in
-private it was the European. It was neatly done,
-very neatly, and it bewildered them so they could not
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_11'>11</span>understand it; for we had been so friendly—so affectionate,
-even—with those simple-minded patriots!
-We, our own selves, had brought back out of exile
-their leader, their hero, their hope, their Washington—Aguinaldo;
-brought him in a warship, in high
-honor, under the sacred shelter and hospitality of the
-flag; brought him back and restored him to his
-people, and got their moving and eloquent gratitude
-for it. Yes, we had been so friendly to them, and had
-heartened them up in so many ways! We had lent
-them guns and ammunition; advised with them; exchanged
-pleasant courtesies with them; placed our
-sick and wounded in their kindly care; entrusted
-our Spanish prisoners to their humane and honest
-hands; fought shoulder to shoulder with them
-against “the common enemy” (our own phrase);
-praised their courage, praised their gallantry,
-praised their mercifulness, praised their fine and
-honorable conduct; borrowed their trenches, borrowed
-strong positions which they had previously
-captured from the Spaniards; petted them, lied to
-them—officially proclaiming that our land and naval
-forces came to give them their freedom and displace
-the bad Spanish Government—fooled them,
-used them until we needed them no longer; then
-derided the sucked orange and threw it away. We
-kept the positions which we had beguiled them of;
-by and by, we moved a force forward and overlapped
-patriot ground—a clever thought, for we
-needed trouble, and this would produce it. A Filipino
-soldier, crossing the ground, where no one had
-a right to forbid him, was shot by our sentry. The
-badgered patriots resented this with arms, without
-waiting to know whether Aguinaldo, who was absent,
-would approve or not. Aguinaldo did not approve;
-but that availed nothing. What we wanted,
-in the interest of Progress and Civilization, was the
-Archipelago, unencumbered by patriots struggling
-for independence; and the War was what we
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_12'>12</span>needed. We clinched our opportunity. It is Mr.
-Chamberlain’s case over again—at least in its motive
-and intention; and we played the game as
-adroitly as he played it himself.”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>At this point in our frank statement of fact to the
-Person Sitting in Darkness, we should throw in a
-little trade-taffy about the Blessings of Civilization—for
-a change, and for the refreshment of his spirit—then
-go on with our tale:</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>“We and the patriots having captured Manila,
-Spain’s ownership of the Archipelago and her sovereignty
-over it were at an end—obliterated—annihilated—not
-a rag or shred of either remaining behind.
-It was then that we conceived the divinely
-humorous idea of <i>buying</i> both of these spectres from
-Spain! [It is quite safe to confess this to the Person
-Sitting in Darkness, since neither he nor any other
-sane person will believe it.] In buying those
-ghosts for twenty millions, we also contracted to
-take care of the friars and their accumulations. I
-think we also agreed to propagate leprosy and
-smallpox, but as to this there is doubt. But it is not
-important; persons afflicted with the friars do not
-mind the other diseases.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>“With our treaty ratified, Manila subdued, and
-our Ghosts secured, we had no further use for
-Aguinaldo and the owners of the Archipelago. We
-forced a war, and we have been hunting America’s
-guest and ally through the woods and swamps ever
-since.”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>At this point in the tale, it will be well to boast
-a little of our war-work and our heroisms in the
-field, so as to make our performance look as fine as
-England’s in South Africa; but I believe it will not
-be best to emphasize this too much. We must be
-cautious. Of course, we must read the war-telegrams
-to the Person, in order to keep up our frankness;
-but we can throw an air of humorousness over
-them, and that will modify their grim eloquence a
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_13'>13</span>little, and their rather indiscreet exhibitions of gory
-exultation. Before reading to him the following display
-heads of the dispatches of November 18, 1900,
-it will be well to practice on them in private first,
-so as to get the right tang of lightness and gaiety
-into them:</p>
-
-<div class='nf-center-c0'>
-<div class='nf-center c008'>
- <div>“ADMINISTRATION WEARY OF PROTRACTED HOSTILITIES!”</div>
- <div class='c003'>“REAL WAR AHEAD FOR FILIPINO REBELS!”<a id='r1' /><a href='#f1' class='c009'><sup>[1]</sup></a></div>
- <div class='c003'>“WILL SHOW NO MERCY!”</div>
- <div class='c003'>“KITCHENER’S PLAN ADOPTED!”</div>
- </div>
-</div>
-
-<div class='footnote' id='f1'>
-<p class='c006'><a href='#r1'>1</a>. “Rebels!” Mumble that funny word—don’t let the
-Person catch it distinctly.</p>
-</div>
-
-<p class='c006'>Kitchener knows how to handle disagreeable
-people who are fighting for their homes and their
-liberties, and we must let on that we are merely
-imitating Kitchener, and have no national interest
-in the matter, further than to get ourselves admired
-by the Great Family of Nations, in which august
-company our Master of the Game has bought a
-place for us in the back row.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>Of course, we must not venture to ignore our
-General MacArthur’s reports—oh, why do they
-keep on printing those embarrassing things?—we
-must drop them trippingly from the tongue and
-take the chances:</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>“During the last ten months our losses have been
-268 killed and 750 wounded; Filipino loss, <i>three thousand
-two hundred and twenty-seven killed</i>, and 694 wounded.”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>We must stand ready to grab the Person Sitting
-in Darkness, for he will swoon away at this confession,
-saying: “Good God, those ‘niggers’ spare their
-wounded, and the Americans massacre theirs!”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>We must bring him to, and coax him and coddle
-him, and assure him that the ways of Providence
-are best, and that it would not become us to find
-fault with them; and then, to show him that we are
-only imitators, not originators, we must read the
-following passage from the letter of an American
-soldier-lad in the Philippines to his mother, published
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_14'>14</span>in <cite>Public Opinion</cite>, of Decorah, Iowa, describing
-the finish of a victorious battle:</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>“W<span class='sc'>e never left one alive. If one was
-wounded, we would run our bayonets
-through him.</span>”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>Having now laid all the historical facts before
-the Person Sitting in Darkness, we should bring
-him to again, and explain them to him. We should
-say to him:</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>“They look doubtful, but in reality they are not.
-There have been lies; yes, but they were told in a
-good cause. We have been treacherous; but that
-was only in order that real good might come out of
-apparent evil. True, we have crushed a deceived
-and confiding people; we have turned against the
-weak and the friendless who trusted us; we have
-stamped out a just and intelligent and well-ordered
-republic; we have stabbed an ally in the back and
-slapped the face of a guest; we have bought a
-Shadow from an enemy that hadn’t it to sell; we
-have robbed a trusting friend of his land and his
-liberty; we have invited our clean young men to
-shoulder a discredited musket and do bandit’s work
-under a flag which bandits have been accustomed
-to fear, not to follow; we have debauched America’s
-honor and blackened her face before the world; but
-each detail was for the best. We know this. The
-Head of every State and Sovereignty in Christendom
-and ninety per cent. of every legislative body
-in Christendom, including our Congress and our
-fifty State Legislatures, are members not only of
-the church, but also of the Blessings-of-Civilization
-Trust. This world-girdling accumulation of trained
-morals, high principles, and justice, cannot do an
-unright thing, an unfair thing, an ungenerous thing,
-an unclean thing. It knows what it is about. Give
-yourself no uneasiness; it is all right.”</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>Now then, that will convince the Person. You
-will see. It will restore the Business. Also, it will
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_15'>15</span>elect the Master of the Game to the vacant place in
-the Trinity of our national gods; and there on their
-high thrones the Three will sit, age after age, in the
-people’s sight, each bearing the Emblem of his service:
-Washington, the Sword of the Liberator; Lincoln,
-the Slave’s Broken Chains; the Master, the Chains Repaired.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>It will give the Business a splendid new start.
-You will see.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>Everything is prosperous, now; everything is
-just as we should wish it. We have got the Archipelago,
-and we shall never give it up. Also, we
-have every reason to hope that we shall have an opportunity
-before very long to slip out of our Congressional
-contract with Cuba and give her something
-better in the place of it. It is a rich country,
-and many of us are already beginning to see that
-the contract was a sentimental mistake. But now—right
-now—is the best time to do some profitable
-rehabilitating work—work that will set us up and
-make us comfortable, and discourage gossip. We
-cannot conceal from ourselves that, privately, we
-are a little troubled about our uniform. It is one of
-our prides; it is acquainted with honor; it is familiar
-with great deeds and noble; we love it, we revere
-it; and so this errand it is on makes us uneasy.
-And our flag—another pride of ours, our chiefest!
-We have worshipped it so; and when we have seen
-it in far lands—glimpsing it unexpectedly in that
-strange sky, waving its welcome and benediction to
-us—we have caught our breath and uncovered our
-heads, and couldn’t speak, for a moment, for the
-thought of what it was to us and the great ideals
-it stood for. Indeed, we <i>must</i> do something about
-these things: we must not have the flag out there,
-and the uniform. They are not needed there; we
-can manage in some other way. England manages,
-as regards the uniform, and so can we. We have to
-send soldiers—we can’t get out of that—but we can
-<span class='pageno' id='Page_16'>16</span>disguise them. It is the way England does in South
-Africa. Even Mr. Chamberlain himself takes pride
-in England’s honorable uniform, and makes the
-army down there wear an ugly and odious and appropriate
-disguise, of yellow stuff such as quarantine
-flags are made of, and which are hoisted to
-warn the healthy away from unclean disease and
-repulsive death. This cloth is called khaki. We
-could adopt it. It is light, comfortable, grotesque,
-and deceives the enemy, for he cannot conceive of
-a soldier being concealed in it.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>And as for a flag for the Philippine Province, it
-is easily managed. We can have a special one—our
-States do it: we can have just our usual flag, with
-the white stripes painted black and the stars replaced
-by the skull and cross-bones.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>And we do not need that Civil Commission out
-there. Having no powers, it has to invent them,
-and that kind of work cannot be effectively done by
-just anybody; an expert is required. Mr. Croker
-can be spared. We do not want the United States
-represented there, but only the Game.</p>
-
-<p class='c006'>By help of these suggested amendments, Progress
-and Civilization in that country can have a
-boom, and it will take in the Persons who are Sitting
-in Darkness, and we can resume Business at the old
-stand.</p>
-
-<div class='lg-container-r'>
- <div class='linegroup'>
- <div class='group'>
- <div class='line'><span class='sc'>Mark Twain.</span></div>
- </div>
- </div>
-</div>
-
-<hr class='c010' />
-<p class='c006'><span class='small'>For copies, address the Anti-Imperialist League of New
-York, 150 Nassau St., Room 1520. Please enclose postage.</span></p>
-
-<div class='pbb'>
- <hr class='pb c003' />
-</div>
-<div class='tnotes'>
-
-<div class='section ph2'>
-
-<div class='nf-center-c0'>
-<div class='nf-center c011'>
- <div>TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES</div>
- </div>
-</div>
-
-</div>
-
- <ol class='ol_1 c002'>
- <li>Silently corrected typographical errors and variations in spelling.
-
- </li>
- <li>Archaic, non-standard, and uncertain spellings retained as printed.
- </li>
- </ol>
-
-</div>
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-<pre>
-
-
-
-
-
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