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+This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements,
+metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be
+in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES.
+
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #55471 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/55471)
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-The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Black Lion Inn, by Alfred Henry Lewis
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
-other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
-the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
-to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
-
-
-
-Title: The Black Lion Inn
-
-Author: Alfred Henry Lewis
-
-Illustrator: Frederic Remington
-
-Release Date: August 31, 2017 [EBook #55471]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE BLACK LION INN ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by David Widger from page images generously
-provided by the Internet Archive
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-THE BLACK LION INN
-
-By Alfred Henry Lewis
-
-Illustrated By Frederic Remington
-
-New York: R. H. Russell
-
-1903
-
-
-[Illustration: 0001]
-
-
-[Illustration: 0008]
-
-
-[Illustration: 0009]
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER I.--HOW I CAME TO THE INN.
-
-Years ago, I came upon an old and hoary tavern when I as a fashion of
-refugee was flying from strong drink. Its name, as shown on the creaking
-sign-board, was The Black Lion Inn. My coming was the fruit of no plan;
-the hostelry was strange to me, and my arrival, casual and desultory,
-one of those accidents which belong with the experiences of folk who,
-whipped of a bad appetite and running from rum, are seeking only to be
-solitary and win a vacation for their selfrespect. This latter commodity
-in my own poor case had been sadly overworked, and called for rest and
-an opportunity of recuperation. Wherefore, going quietly and without
-word from the great city, I found this ancient inn with a purpose to
-turn presently sober. Also by remaining secluded for a space I would
-permit the memory of those recent dubious exploits of the cup to become
-a bit dimmed in the bosom of my discouraged relatives.
-
-It turned a most fortunate blunder, this blundering discovery of the
-aged inn, for it was here I met the Jolly Doctor who, by saving me from
-my fate of a drunkard, a fate to which I was hopelessly surrendered,
-will dwell ever in my thoughts as a greatest benefactor.
-
-There is that about an appetite for alcohol I can not understand. In my
-personal instance there is reason to believe it was inherited. And yet
-my own father never touched a drop and lived and died the uncompromising
-enemy of the bowl. It was from my grandsire, doubtless, I had any
-hankering after rum, for I have heard a sigh or two of how that dashing
-military gentleman so devoted himself to it that he fairly perished for
-very faithfulness as far away as eighty odd long years.
-
-Once when my father and I were roaming the snow-filled woods with our
-guns--I was a lad of twelve--having heard little of that ancestor, I
-asked him what malady carried off my grandsire. My father did not reply
-at once, but stalked silently ahead, rifle caught under arm, the snow
-crunching beneath his heavy boots. Then he flung a sentence over his
-shoulder.
-
-“Poor whiskey more than anything else,” said my father.
-
-Even at the unripe age of twelve I could tell how the subject was
-unpleasant to my parent and did not press it. I saved my curiosity until
-evening when my mother and I were alone. My mother, to whom I re-put the
-query, informed me in whispers how she had been told--for she never met
-him, he being dead and gone before her day--my grandsire threw away his
-existence upon the bottle.
-
-The taste for strong waters so developed in my grandsire would seem like
-a quartz-ledge to have “dipped” beneath my father to strike the family
-surface with all its old-time richness in myself. I state this the more
-secure of its truth because I was instantly and completely a drunkard,
-waiving every preliminary stage as a novice, from the moment of my first
-glass.
-
-It was my first day of the tavern when I met the Jolly Doctor. The
-tavern was his home--for he lived a perilous bachelor--and had been
-many years; and when, being in a shaken state, I sent down from the
-apartments I had taken and requested the presence of a physician, he
-came up to me. He had me right and on my feet in the course of a
-few hours, and then I began to look him in the face and make his
-acquaintance.
-
-As I abode in the tavern for a considerable space, we put in many
-friendly hours together. The Jolly Doctor was a round, strong, active
-body of a man, virile and with an atmosphere almost hypnotic. His
-forehead was good, his jaw hard, his nose arched, while his gray-blue
-eyes, half sour, half humorous and deeply wise of the world, gleamed in
-his head with the shine of beads.
-
-One evening while we were together about the fireplace of my parlor, I
-was for having up a bottle of sherry.
-
-“Before you give the order,” said the Jolly Doctor, restraining me with
-a friendly yet semiprofessional gesture, “let me say a word. Let me ask
-whether you have an intention or even a hope of one day--no matter how
-distant--quitting alcohol?” Without pausing for my answer, the Jolly
-Doctor went on. “You are yet a young man; I suppose you have seen thirty
-years. It has been my experience, albeit I’m but fifteen years your
-senior and not therefore as old as a hill, that no man uproots a habit
-after he has reached middle age. While climbing, mentally, physically,
-nervously, the slope of his years and adding to, not taking from,
-his strength, a man may so far re-draw himself as to make or break an
-appetite--the appetite of strong drink--if you will. But let him attain
-the summit of his strength, reach as it were the crest of his days and
-begin to travel down the easy long descent toward the grave, and every
-chance of change has perished beyond his reach. You are thirty; and to
-make it short, my friend, you must, considering what bottle tendencies
-lie latent within you, stop now and stop hard, or you are lost forever.”
-
-To say I was impressed is not to exaggerate. I was frank enough to
-confess, however, that privately I held no hope of change. Several years
-before, I had become convinced, after a full survey of myself and the
-close study of my inclinations, that I was born to live and die, like my
-grandsire, the victim of drink. I was its thrall, bound to it as I
-lay in my cradle; there existed no gate of escape. This I told;
-not joyously, I promise you, or as one reciting good fortune; not
-argumentatively and as reason for the forthcoming of asked-for wine; but
-because it was true and made, as I held it, a reason for going in this
-matter of tipple with freest rein since dodge or balk my fate I might
-not.
-
-At the close my Jolly Doctor shook his head in negative.
-
-“No man knows his destiny,” said he, “until the game’s played out. Come,
-let me prescribe for you. The drug I have in mind has cured folk; I
-should add, too, that for some it carries neither power nor worth.
-Still, it will do no harm, and since we may have a test of its virtues
-within three days; at the worst you will be called upon to surrender no
-more than seventy-two hours to sobriety.” This last was delivered like a
-cynic.
-
-On my side, I not only thanked the Jolly Doctor for his concern, but
-hastened to assure him I would willingly make pact to abstain from
-alcohol not three days, but three weeks or three months, were it
-necessary to pleasure his experiment. My bent for drink was in that
-degree peculiar that I was not so much its disciple who must worship
-constantly and every day, as one of those who are given to sprees. Often
-and of choice I was a stranger to so much as the odor of rum for weeks
-on end. Then would come other weeks of tumult and riot and drunkenness.
-The terms of trial for his medicine would be easily and comfortably
-undergone by me. He had my promise of three days free of rum.
-
-The Jolly Doctor went to his room; returning, he placed on the table a
-little bottle of liquid, reddish in color and bitter of taste.
-
-“Red cinchona, it is,” said the Jolly Doctor; “cinchona rubra, or
-rather the fluid extract of that bark. It is not a tincture; there is no
-alcohol about it. The remedy is well known and I oft marvel it has had
-no wider vogue. As I’ve told you, and on the principle, probably,
-that one man’s poison is another man’s food, it does not always cure.
-However, we will give you a teaspoonful once in three hours and observe
-the effect in your particular case.”
-
-There shall be little more related on this point of dypsomania and its
-remedy. I took the prescription for a trio of days. At the expiration I
-sate me solemnly down and debated within myself whether or no I
-craved strong drink, with the full purpose of calling for it if I did.
-Absolutely, the anxiety was absent; and since I had resolved not to
-force the bottle upon myself, but to give the Jolly Doctor and his drug
-all proper show to gain a victory, I made no alcohol demands. All this
-was years ago, and from that hour until now, when I write these lines,
-I’ve neither taken nor wanted alcohol. I’ve gone freely where it was,
-and abode for hours at tables when others poured and tossed it off; for
-myself I’ve craved none and taken none.
-
-Toward the last of my stay, there came to dwell at the hostelry a goodly
-circle; one for a most part chance-sown. For days it had been snowing
-with a free, persistent hand; softly, industriously, indomitably fell
-the flakes, straight down and unflurried of a wind, until the cold light
-element lay about the tavern for a level depth of full three feet. It
-was the sort of weather in which one should read Whittier’s Snow-Bound.
-
-Our circle, as snow-pent and held within door we drew about the tavern
-fire, offered a chequered citizenry. On the earliest occasion of our
-comradeship, while the snow sifted about the old-fashioned panes and
-showed through them with the whiteness of milk, I cast my eye over the
-group to collect for myself a mental picture of my companions.
-
-At the right hand of the Jolly Doctor, solid in his arm chair, sat a Red
-Nosed Gentleman. He showed prosperous of this world’s goods and owned to
-a warm weakness for burgundy. He was particular to keep ever a bottle
-at his elbow, and constantly supported his interest in what was current
-with a moderate glass.
-
-In sharpest contrast to the Red Nosed Gentleman there should be
-mentioned a gray old gentleman of sour and forbidding eye. The Jolly
-Doctor, who had known him for long, gave me in a whisper his story. This
-Sour Gentleman, like the Red Nosed Gentleman, had half retired from the
-cares of business. The Red Nosed Gentleman in his later days had been
-a stock speculator, as in sooth had the Sour Gentleman, and each would
-still on occasion carry a few thousand shares for a week or two and then
-swoop on a profit with quite the eagerness of any hawk on any hen.
-
-Not to be overlooked, in a corner nearest the chimney was a seamed white
-old figure, tall and spare, yet with vigorous thews still strung in the
-teeth of his all but four score years. He was referred to during our
-amiable captivity, and while we sate snow-locked about the mighty
-fire-place, as the Old Cattleman.
-
-Half comrade and half ward, our Old Cattleman had with him a taciturn,
-grave individual, to whom he gave the title of “Sioux Sam,” and whose
-father, he informed us, had been a French trader from St. Louis, while
-his mother was a squaw of the tribe that furnished the first portion of
-his name.
-
-As we brought arm chairs about the fire-place on our first snow-bound
-evening, moved possibly by the Red Nosed Gentleman’s burgundy, which
-that florid person had urged upon his attention, the Jolly Doctor set
-the little community a good story-telling example.
-
-“This story, I should premise,” said the Jolly Doctor, mollifying
-certain rawnesses of his throat with a final glass of the Red Nosed
-Gentleman’s burgundy, “belongs to no experience of my own. I shall tell
-it as it was given me. It speaks broadly of the west and of the folk of
-cows and the Indians, and was set uppermost in my memory by the presence
-of our western friends.” Here the Jolly Doctor indicated the Old
-Cattleman and that product of the French fur trader and his Indian wife,
-Sioux Sam, by a polite wave of his glass. Then tossing off the last of
-his burgundy he, without tedious preliminary, struck into his little
-history.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER II.--THE WINNING OF SAUCY PAOLI.
-
-Gray Wolf sits within the shadow of the agency cottonwood and puffs
-unhappy kinnikinic from his red stone pipe. Heavy, dull and hot lies the
-August afternoon; heavy, dull and hot lies the heart of Gray Wolf. There
-is a profound grief at his soul’s roots. The Indian’s is not a mobile
-face. In full expression it is capable only of apathy or rage. If
-your Indian would show you mirth or woe, he must eke out the dim and
-half-told story with streaks of paint. But so deep is the present sorrow
-of Gray Wolf that, even without the aid of graphic ochre, one reads some
-shadow of it in the wrinkled brows and brooding eyes.
-
-What is this to so beat upon our dismal Osage? There is a dab of mud
-in his hair; his blanket is rags, and his moccasins are rusty and worn.
-These be weeds of mourning. Death has crept to the tepee of Gray Wolf
-and taken a prey. It was Catbird, the squaw of Gray Wolf.
-
-However, his to-day’s sadness is not for the departed Catbird. He
-married her without laughter, and saw her pass without tears, as became
-a man and an Osage. When her breath was gone, the women combed her
-hair and dressed her in new, gay clothes, and burned the sacred cedar.
-Gray Wolf, after the usage of his fathers, seated her--knees to chin--on
-yonder hilltop, wrapped her in rawhides, and, as against the curiosity
-of coyotes and other prowling vermin of the night, budded her solidly
-about and over with heavy stones. You may see the rude mausole, like
-some tumbledown chimney, from the agency door. That was a moon ago.
-Another will go by; Gray Wolf will lay off his rags and tatters, comb
-the clay from his hair, and give a dance to show that he mourns no
-more. No, it is not the lost Catbird--good squaw though she was--that
-embitters the tobacco and haunts the moods of Gray Wolf. It is something
-more awful than death--that merest savage commonplace; something to
-touch the important fiber of pride.
-
-Gray Wolf is proud, as indeed he has concern to be. Not alone is he
-eminent as an Osage; he is likewise an eminent Indian. Those two thin
-ragged lines of blue tattoo which, on each side from the point of the
-jaw, run downward on the neck until they disappear beneath his blanket,
-prove Gray Wolf’s elevation. They are the marks of an aboriginal
-nobility whereof the paleface in his ignorance knows nothing. Thirty
-Indians in all the tribes may wear these marks. And yet, despite such
-signs of respect, Gray Wolf has become the subject of acrid tribal
-criticism; and he feels it like the edge of a knife.
-
-Keats was quill-pricked to death by critics. But Keats was an Englishman
-and a poet. Petronius Arbiter, Nero’s minion, was also criticised;
-despite the faultfinder, however, he lived in cloudless merry luxury,
-and died laughing. But Petronius was a Roman and an epicure. Gray Wolf
-is to gain nothing by these examples. He would not die like the verse
-maker, he could not laugh like the consul; there is a gulf between Gray
-Wolf and these as wide as the width of the possible. Gray Wolf is a
-stoic, and therefore neither so callous nor so wise as an epicure.
-Moreover, he is a savage and not a poet. Petronius came to be nothing
-better than an appetite; Gray Wolf rises to the heights of an emotion.
-Keats was a radical of sensibility, ransacking a firmament; Gray Wolf is
-an earthgoing conservative--a more stupendous Tory than any Bolingbroke.
-Of the two, while resembling neither, Gray Wolf comes nearer the poet
-than the Sybarite, since he can feel.
-
-Let it be remarked that Osage criticism is no trivial thing. It is so
-far peculiar that never a word or look, or even a detractory shrug is
-made to be its evidence. Your Osage tells no evil tales of you to his
-neighbor. His conduct goes guiltless of slanderous syllable or gesture.
-But he criticises you in his heart; he is strenuous to think ill of you;
-and by some fashion of telepathy you know and feel and burn with this
-tacit condemnation as much as ever you might from hot irons laid on your
-forehead. It is this criticism, as silent as it is general, that gnaws
-at Gray Wolf’s heart and makes his somber visage more somber yet.
-
-It was the week before when Gray Wolf, puffed of a vain conceit, matched
-Sundown, his pinto pony--swift as a winter wind, he deemed her--against
-a piebald, leggy roan, the property of Dull Ox, the cunning Ponca. The
-race had wide advertisement; it took shape between the Osages and
-the Poncas as an international event. Gray Wolf assured his tribe of
-victory; his Sundown was a shooting star, the roan a turtle; whereupon
-the Osages, ever ready as natural patriots to believe the worst Osage
-thing to be better than the best thing Ponca, fatuously wagered their
-substance on Sundown, even unto the beads on their moccasins.
-
-The race was run; the ubiquitous roan, fleeter than a shadow, went by
-poor Sundown as though she ran with hobbles on. Dull Ox won; the Poncas
-won. The believing Osages were stripped of their last blanket; and even
-as Gray Wolf sits beneath the agency cottonwood and writhes while he
-considers what his pillaged countrymen must think of him, the exultant
-Poncas are in the midst of a protracted spree, something in the nature
-of a scalp dance, meant to celebrate their triumph and emphasize the
-thoroughness wherewith the Osages were routed. Is it marvel, then, that
-Osage thought is full of resentment, or that Gray Wolf feels its sting?
-
-Over across from the moody Gray Wolf, Bill Henry lounges in the
-wide doorway of Florer’s agency store. Bill Henry is young, about
-twenty-three, in truth. He has a quick, handsome face, with gray eyes
-that dance and gleam, and promise explosiveness of temper. The tan that
-darkens Bill Henry’s skin wherever the sun may get to it, and which is
-comparable to the color of a saddle or a law book, testifies that the
-vivacious Bill is no recent importation. Five full years on the plains
-would be needed to ripen one to that durable hue.
-
-Bill gazes out upon Gray Wolf as the latter sticks to the cottonwood’s
-shade; a plan is running in the thoughts of Bill. There is call for
-change in Bill’s destinies, and he must have the Gray Wolf’s consent to
-what he bears in mind.
-
-Bill has followed cattle since he turned his back on Maryland, a quintet
-of years before, and pushed westward two thousand miles to commence a
-career. Bill’s family is of that aristocracy which adorns the “Eastern
-Shore” of Lord Baltimore’s old domain. His folk are of consequence, and
-intended that Bill should take a high position. Bill’s mother, an ardent
-church woman, had a pulpit in her thoughts for Bill; his father, more
-of the world, urged on his son the law. But Bill’s bent was towards the
-laws neither of heaven nor of men. The romantic overgrew the practical
-in his nature. He leaned not to labor, whether mental or physical, and
-he liked danger and change and careless savageries.
-
-Civilization is artificial; it is a creature of convention, of clocks,
-of hours, of an unending procession of sleep, victuals and work. Bill
-distasted such orderly matters and felt instinctive abhorrence therefor.
-The day in and day out effort called for to remain civilized terrified
-Bill; his soul gave up the task before it was begun.
-
-But savagery? Ah, that was different! Savagery was natural, easy and
-comfortable to the very heart’s blood of Bill, shiftless and wild as it
-ran. Bill was an instance of what wise folk term “reversion to type,”
-and thus it befell, while his father tugged one way and his mother
-another, Bill himself went suddenly from under their hands, fled from
-both altar and forum, and never paused until he found himself within the
-generous reaches of the Texas Panhandle. There, as related, and because
-savagery cannot mean entire idleness, Bill gave himself to a pursuit of
-cows, and soon had moderate fame as a rider, a roper, a gambler, and a
-quick, sure hand with a gun, and for whatever was deemed excellent in
-those regions wherein he abode.
-
-Bill’s presence among the Osages is the upcome of a dispute which fell
-forth between Bill and a comrade in a barroom of Mobeetie. Bill and the
-comrade aforesaid played at a device called “draw poker;” and Bill,
-in attempting to supply the deficiencies of a four flush with his six
-shooter, managed the other’s serious wounding. This so shook Bill’s
-standing in the Panhandle, so marked him to the common eye as a boy of
-dangerous petulance, that Bill sagely withdrew between two days; and
-now, three hundred miles to the north and east, he seeks among the
-Indians for newer pastures more serene.
-
-When we meet him Bill has been with the Osages the space of six weeks.
-And already he begins to doubt his welcome. Not that the Osages object.
-Your Indian objects to nothing that does not find shape as an immediate
-personal invasion of himself. But the government agent--a stern,
-decisive person--likes not the presence of straggling whites among his
-copper charges; already has he made intimation to Bill that his Osage
-sojourn should be short. Any moment this autocrat may despatch his
-marshal to march Bill off the reservation.
-
-Bill does not enjoy the outlook. Within the brief frontiers of those
-six weeks of his visit, Bill has contracted an eager fondness for Osage
-life. Your Indian is so far scriptural that he taketh scant heed of the
-morrow, and believeth with all his soul that sufficient unto the day
-is the evil thereof. Here was a program to dovetail with those natural
-moods of Bill. His very being, when once it understood, arose on tiptoe
-to embrace it. Bill has become an Osage in his breast; as he poses with
-listless grace in Florer’s portals, he is considering means whereby
-he may manage a jointure with the tribe, and become in actual truth a
-member.
-
-There is but one door to his coming; Bill must wed his way into Osage
-citizenship. He must take a daughter of the tribe to wife; turn “squaw
-man,” as it is called. Then will Bill be a fullblown Osage; then may no
-agent molest him or make him afraid.
-
-This amiable plot, as he lounges in Florer’s door, is already decided
-upon by Bill. His fancy has even pitched upon the damsel whom he will
-honor with the title of “Mrs. Bill.” It is this selection that produces
-Gray Wolf as a factor in Bill’s intended happiness, since Gray Wolf is
-the parent of the Saucy Paoli, to whom Bill’s hopes are turned. Bill
-must meet and treat with Gray Wolf for his daughter, discover her
-“price,” and pay it.
-
-[Illustration: 0027]
-
-As to the lady herself and her generous consent when once her father is
-won, Bill harbors no misgivings. He believes too well of his handsome
-person; moreover, has he not demonstrated in friendly bout, on foot and
-on horseback, his superiority to the young Osage bucks who would pit
-themselves against him? Has he not out-run, out-wrestled and out-ridden
-them? And at work with either rifle, six-shooter or knife, has he not
-opened their eyes? Also, he has conquered them at cards; and their
-money and their ponies and their gewgaws to a healthful value are his as
-spoils thereof.
-
-Bill is all things that a lady of sensibility should love; and for that
-on those two or three occasions when he came unexpectedly upon her,
-the Saucy Paoli dodged within the ancestral lodge to daub her nose and
-cheeks with hurried yet graceful red, thereby to improve and give her
-beauties point, Bill knows he has touched her heart. Yes, forsooth!
-Bill feels sure of the Saucy Paoli; it is Gray Wolf, somber of his late
-defeat by the wily Dull Ox and the evanescent roan, toward whom his
-apprehensions turn their face. The more, perhaps, since Bill himself,
-not being a blinded Osage, and having besides some certain wit
-concerning horses, scrupled not to wager and win on the Ponca entry,
-and against the beloved Sundown of his father-in-law to come. It is
-the notion that Gray Wolf might resent this apostasy that breeds a half
-pause in Bill’s optimism as he loafs in Florer’s door.
-
-As Bill stands thus musing, the Saucy Paoli goes by. The Saucy Paoli is
-light, pretty, round and wholesome, and she glances with shy, engaging
-softness on Bill from eyes as dark and big and deep as a deer’s. Is it
-not worth while to wed her? The Osages are owners in fee of one million,
-five hundred thousand acres of best land; they have eight even millions
-of dollars stored in the Great Father’s strong chests in Washington;
-they are paid each one hundred and forty dollars by their fostering
-Great Father as an annual present; and the head of the house draws all
-for himself and his own. Marriage will mean an instant yearly income of
-two hundred and eighty dollars; moreover, there may come the profitable
-papoose, and with each such a money augmentation of one hundred and
-forty dollars. And again, there are but sixteen hundred Osages told and
-counted; and so would Bill gain a strong per cent, in the tribal domain
-and the tribal treasure. Altogether, a union with the fair, brown Saucy
-Paoli is a prospect fraught of sunshine; and so Bill wisely deems it.
-
-For an hour it has leaped in Bill’s thoughts as an impulse to go across
-to the spreading cottonwood, propose himself to the Gray Wolf for the
-Saucy Paoli, and elicit reply. It would not be the Osage way, but Bill
-is not yet an Osage, and some reasonable allowance should be made by
-Gray Wolf for the rudeness of a paleface education. Such step would earn
-an answer, certain and complete. Your savage beateth not about the bush.
-His diplomacy is Bismarckian; it is direct and proceeds by straight
-lines.
-
-Thus chase Bill’s cogitations when the sudden sight of the Saucy Paoli
-and her glances, full of wist and warmth, fasten his gallant fancy and
-crystalize a resolution to act at once.
-
-“How!” observes Bill, by way of salutation, as he stands before Gray
-Wolf.
-
-That warrior grunts swinish, though polite, response. Then Bill goes
-directly to the core of his employ; he explains his passion, sets forth
-his hopes, and by dashing swoops arrives at the point which, according
-to Bill’s blunt theories, should quicken the interest of Gray Wolf, and
-says:
-
-“Now, what price? How many ponies?”
-
-“How many you give?” retorts the cautious Gray Wolf.
-
-“Fifteen.” Bill stands ready to go to thirty.
-
-“Ugh!” observes Gray Wolf, and then he looks out across the prairie
-grasses where the thick smoke shows the summer fires to be burning them
-far away.
-
-“Thirty ponies,” says Bill after a pause.
-
-These or their money equivalent--six hundred dollars--Bill knows to be a
-fat figure. He believes Gray Wolf will yield.
-
-But Bill is in partial error. Gray Wolf is not in any sordid, money
-frame. Your savage is a sentimentalist solely on two matters: those to
-touch his pride and those to wake his patriotism. And because of the
-recent triumph of the Poncas, and the consequent censures upon him now
-flaming, though hidden, in the common Osage heart, Gray Wolf’s pride is
-raw and throbbing. He looks up at Bill where he waits.
-
-“One pony!” says Gray Wolf.
-
-“One?”
-
-“But it must beat the Ponca’s roan.”
-
-Four hundred miles to the westward lie the broad ranges of the
-Triangle-Dot. Throughout all cow-land the ponies of the Triangle-Dot
-have name for speed. As far eastward as the Panhandle and westward
-to the Needles, as far southward as Seven Rivers and northward to the
-Spanish Peaks, has their fame been flung. About camp fires and among the
-boys of cows are tales told of Triangle-Dot ponies that overtake coyotes
-and jack-rabbits. More, they are exalted as having on a time raced even
-with an antelope. These ponies are children of a blue-grass sire, as
-thoroughbred as ever came out of Kentucky. Little in size, yet a
-ghost to go; his name was Redemption. These speedy mustang babies of
-Redemption have yet to meet their master in the whole southwest. And
-Bill knows of them; he has seen them run.
-
-“In two moons, my father,” says Bill.
-
-There is much creaking of saddle leathers; there is finally a deep dig
-in the flanks by the long spurs, and Bill, mounted on his best, rides
-out of Pauhauska. His blankets are strapped behind, his war bags bulge
-with provand, he is fully armed; of a verity, Bill meditates a
-journey. Four hundred miles--and return--no less, to the ranges of the
-Triangle-Dot.
-
-Gray Wolf watches from beneath the cottonwood that already begins to
-throw its shadows long; his eyes follow Bill until the latter’s broad
-brimmed, gray sombrero disappears on the hill-crests over beyond Bird
-River.
-
-It skills not to follow Bill in this pilgrimage. He fords rivers; he
-sups and sleeps at casual camps; now and again he pauses for the night
-at some chance plaza of the Mexicans; but first and last he pushes ever
-on and on at a round road gait, and with the end he has success.
-
-Within his time by full three weeks Bill is again at the agency of the
-Osages; and with him comes a pony, lean of muzzle, mild of eye, wide of
-forehead, deep of lung, silken of mane, slim of limb, a daughter of
-the great Redemption; and so true and beautiful is she in each line she
-seems rather for air than earth. And she is named the Spirit.
-
-Gray Wolf goes over the Spirit with eye and palm. He feels her velvet
-coat; picks up one by one her small hoofs, polished and hard as agate.
-
-The Spirit has private trial with Sundown and leaves that hopeless
-cayuse as if the latter were pegged to the prairie.
-
-“Ugh!” says Gray Wolf, at the finish. “Heap good pony!”
-
-Your savage is not a personage of stopwatches, weights and records. At
-the best, he may only guess concerning a pony’s performance. Also his
-vanity has wings, though his pony has none, and once he gets it into his
-savage head that his pony can race, it is never long ere he regards
-him as invincible. Thus is it with Dull Ox and his precious roan. That
-besotted Ponca promptly accepts the Gray Wolf challenge for a second
-contest.
-
-The day arrives. The race is to be run on the Osage course--a quarter of
-a mile, straight-away--at the Pauhauska agency. Two thousand Osages and
-Poncas are gathered together. There is no laughter, no uproar, no loud
-talk; all is gravity, dignity and decorum. The stakes are one thousand
-dollars a side, for Gray Wolf and Dull Ox are opulent pagans.
-
-The ponies are brought up and looked over. The fires of a thousand
-racing ancestors burn in the eyes of the Spirit; the Poncas should
-take warning. But they do not; wagers run higher. The Osages have by
-resolution of their fifteen legislators brought the public money to the
-field. Thus they are rich for speculation, where, otherwise, by virtue
-of former losses, they would be helpless with empty hands.
-
-Bet after bet is made. The pool box is a red blanket spread on the
-grass. It is presided over by a buck, impecunious but of fine integrity.
-
-Being moneyless, he will make no bet himself; being honest, he will
-faithfully guard the treasure put within his care. A sporting buck
-approaches the blanket; he grumbles a word or two in the ear of the
-pool master who sits at the blanket’s head; then he searches forth a
-hundred-dollar bill from the darker recesses of his blanket and lays it
-on the red betting-cloth. Another comes up; the pool master murmurs the
-name of the pony on which the hundred is offered; it is covered by the
-second speculator; that wager is complete. Others arrive at the betting
-blanket; its entire surface becomes dotted with bank notes--two and
-two they lie together, each wagered against the other. The blanket is
-covered and concealed with the money piled upon it. One begins to wonder
-how a winner is to know his wealth. There will be no clash, no dispute.
-Savages never cheat; and each will know his own. Besides, there is the
-poverty-eaten, honest buck, watching all, to be appealed to should an
-accidental confusion of wagers occur.
-
-On a bright blanket, a trifle to one side--not to be under the moccasins
-of commerce, as it were--sits the Saucy Paoli. She is without motion;
-and a blanket, covering her from little head to little foot, leaves
-not so much as a stray lock or the tip of an ear for one’s gaze to rest
-upon. The Saucy Paoli is present dutifully to answer the outcome of the
-Gray Wolf’s pact with Bill. One wonders how does her heart beat, and
-how roam her hopes? Is she for the roan, or is she for the Glory of the
-Triangle-Dot?
-
-[Illustration: 0041]
-
-The solemn judges draw their blankets about them and settle to their
-places. Three Poncas and three Osages on a side they are; they seat
-themselves opposite each other with twenty feet between. A line is drawn
-from trio to trio; that will serve as wire. The pony to cross first will
-be victor.
-
-Now all is ready! The rival ponies are at the head of the course; it
-will be a standing start. A grave buck sits in the saddle near the two
-racers and to their rear. He is the starter. Suddenly he cracks off a
-Winchester, skyward. It is the signal.
-
-The ponies leap like panthers at the sound. There is a swooping rush;
-for one hundred yards they run together, then the Spirit takes the lead.
-Swifter than the thrown lance, swift as the sped arrow she comes! With
-each instant she leaves and still further leaves the roan! What has
-such as the mongrel pony of the Poncas to do with the Flower of the
-Triangle-Dot? The Spirit flashes between the double triumvirate of
-judges, winner by fifty yards!
-
-And now one expects a shout. There is none. The losing Poncas and the
-triumphant Osages alike are stolid and dignified. Only Gray Wolf’s eyes
-gleam, and the cords in his neck swell. He has been redeemed with his
-people; his honor has been returned; his pride can again hold up its
-head. But while his heart may bound, his face must be like iron. Such is
-the etiquette of savagery.
-
-Both Gray Wolf and the Osages will exult later, noisily, vociferously.
-There will be feasting and dancing. Now they must be grave and guarded,
-both for their own credit and to save their Ponca adversaries from a
-wound.
-
-Bill turns and rides slowly back to the judges. The Spirit, daughter of
-Redemption, stands with fire eyes and tiger lily nostrils. Bill swings
-from the saddle. Gray Wolf throws off the blanket from the Saucy Paoli,
-where she waits, head bowed and silent. Her dress is the climax of Osage
-magnificence; the Saucy Paoli glows like a ruby against the dusk green
-of the prairie. Bill takes the Saucy Paoli’s hand and raises her to her
-feet.
-
-She lifts her head. Her glance is shy, yet warm and glad. She hesitates.
-Then, as one who takes courage--just as might a white girl, though with
-less of art--she puts up her lips to be kissed.
-
-“Now that is what I call a fair story,” commented the Red Nosed
-Gentleman approvingly when the Jolly Doctor came to a pause; “only I
-don’t like that notion of a white man marrying an Indian. It’s apt to
-keep alive in the children the worst characteristics of both races and
-none of the virtues of either.”
-
-“Now I don’t know that,” observed the Sour Gentleman, contentiously.
-“In my own state of Virginia many of our best people are proud to trace
-their blood to Pocahontas, who was sold for a copper kettle. I, myself,
-am supposed to have a spoonful of the blood of that daughter of Powhatan
-in my veins; and while it is unpleasant to recall one’s ancestress as
-having gone from hand to hand as the subject of barter and sale--and
-for no mighty price at that--I cannot say I would wish it otherwise.
-My Indian blood fits me very well. Did you say”--turning to the Jolly
-Doctor--“did you say, sir, you knew this young man who won the Saucy
-Paoli?”
-
-“No,” returned the Jolly Doctor, “I am guiltless of acquaintance with
-him. The story came to me from one of our Indian agents.”
-
-While this talk went forward, Sioux Sam, who understood English
-perfectly and talked it very well, albeit with a guttural Indian effect,
-and who had listened to the Jolly Doctor’s story with every mark of
-interest, was saying something in a whisper to the Old Cattleman.
-
-“He tells me,” remarked the Old Cattleman in reply to my look of
-curiosity, “that if you-alls don’t mind, he’ll onfold on you a Injun
-tale himse’f. It’s one of these yere folk-lore stories, I suppose, as
-Doc Peets used to call ’em.”
-
-The whole company made haste to assure Sioux Sam that his proposal was
-deeply the popular one; thus cheered, our dark-skinned raconteur, first
-lighting his pipe with a coal from the great fireplace, issued forth
-upon his verbal journey.
-
-“An’ this,” said Sioux Sam, lifting a dark finger to invoke attention
-and puffing a cloud the while, “an’ this tale, which shows how Forked
-Tongue, the bad medicine man, was burned, must teach how never to let
-the heart fill up with hate like a pond with the rains, nor permit the
-tongue to go a crooked trail.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER III.--HOW FORKED TONGUE WAS BURNED.
-
-The time is long, long ago. Ugly Elk is the great chief of the Sioux,
-an’ he’s so ugly an’ his face so hideous, he makes a great laugh
-wherever he goes. But the people are careful to laugh when the Ugly
-Elk’s back is toward them. If they went in front of him an’ laugh, he’d
-go among them with his stone war-axe; for Ugly Elk is sensitive about
-his looks.
-
-Ugly Elk is the warchief of the Sioux an’ keeps his camp on the high
-bluffs that mark the southern border of the Sioux country where he can
-look out far on the plains an’ see if the Pawnees go into the Sioux
-hills to hunt. Should the Pawnees try this, then Ugly Elk calls up his
-young men an’ pounces on the Pawnees like a coyote on a sage hen, an’
-when Ugly Elk gets through, the Pawnees are hard to find.
-
-It turns so, however, that the Pawnees grow tired. Ugly Elk’s war yell
-makes their knees weak, an’ when they see the smoke of his fire they
-turn an’ run. Then Ugly Elk has peace in his tepees on the bluffs, an’
-eats an’ smokes an’ counts his scalps an’ no Pawnee comes to anger him.
-An’ the Sioux look up to him as a mighty fighter, an’ what Ugly Elk says
-goes as law from east to west an’ no’th to south throughout the country
-of the Sioux.
-
-Ugly Elk has no sons or daughters an’ all his squaws are old an’ dead
-an’ asleep forever in their rawhides, high on pole scaffolds where the
-wolves can’t come. An’ because Ugly Elk is lonesome an’ would hear good
-words about his lodge an’ feel that truth is near, he asks his nephew,
-Running Water, to live with him when now the years grow deep an’ deeper
-on his head. The nephew is named Running Water because there is no
-muddiness of lies about him, an’ his life runs clear an’ swift an’
-good. Some day Running Water will be chief, an’ then they will call him
-Kill-Bear, because he once sat down an’ waited until a grizzly came up;
-an’ when he had come up, Running Water offered him the muzzle of his gun
-to bite; an’ then as the grizzly took it between his jaws, Running Water
-blew off his head. An’ for that he was called Kill-Bear, an’ made chief.
-But that is not for a long time, an’ comes after Ugly Elk has died an’
-been given a scaffold of poles with his squaws.
-
-Ugly Elk has his heart full of love for Running Water an’ wants him ever
-in his sight an’ to hear his voice. Also, he declares to the Sioux that
-they must make Running Water their chief when he is gone. The Sioux say
-that if he will fight the Pawnees, like Ugly Elk, until the smoke of his
-camp is the smoke of fear to the Pawnees, he shall be their chief. An’
-because Running Water is as bold as he is true, Ugly Elk accepts the
-promise of the Sioux an’ rests content that all will be as he asks when
-his eyes close for the long sleep.
-
-But while Ugly Elk an’ Running Water are happy for each other, there is
-one whose heart turns black as he looks upon them. It is Forked Tongue,
-the medicine man; he is the cousin of Ugly Elk, an’ full of lies an’
-treachery. Also, he wants to be chief when that day comes for Ugly Elk
-to die an’ go away. Forked Tongue feels hate for Running Water, an’ he
-plans to kill him.
-
-Forked Tongue talks with Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, an’ who has once helped
-Forked Tongue with his medicine. Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is very wise;
-also he wants revenge on Forked Tongue, who promised him a bowl of
-molasses an’ then put a cheat on him.
-
-When Forked Tongue powwows with Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear thinks now he
-will have vengeance on Forked Tongue, who was false about the molasses.
-Thereupon, he rests his head on his paw, an’ makes as if he thinks an’
-thinks; an’ after a long while he tells Forked Tongue what to do.
-
-“Follow my word,” says Moh-Kwa, “an’ it will bring success.”
-
-But Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, doesn’t say to whom “success” will come; nor
-does Forked Tongue notice because liars are ever quickest to believe,
-an’ there is no one so easy to deceive as a treacherous man. Forked
-Tongue leaves Moh-Kwa an’ turns to carry out his su’gestions.
-
-Forked Tongue talks to Ugly Elk when they’re alone an’ touches his
-feelings where they’re sore.
-
-“The Running Water laughs at you,” says Forked Tongue to Ugly Elk. “He
-says you are more hideous than a gray gaunt old wolf, an’ that he must
-hold his head away when you an’ he are together. If he looked at you, he
-says, you are so ugly he would laugh till he died.”
-
-Then the Ugly Elk turned to fire with rage.
-
-“How will you prove that?” says Ugly Elk to Forked Tongue.
-
-Forked Tongue is ready, for Moh-Kwa has foreseen the question of Ugly
-Elk.
-
-“You may prove it for yourself,” says Forked Tongue. “When you an’
-Running Water are together, see if he does not turn away his head.”
-
-That night it is as Forked Tongue said. Running Water looks up at the
-top of the lodge, or down at the robes on the ground, or he turns his
-back on Ugly Elk; but he never once rests his eyes on Ugly Elk or looks
-him in the face. An’ the reason is this: Forked Tongue has told Running
-Water that Ugly Elk complained that Running Water’s eye was evil; that
-his medicine told him this; an’ that he asked Forked Tongue to command
-Running Water not to look on him, the Ugly Elk, for ten wakes an’ ten
-sleeps, when the evil would have gone out of his eye.
-
-“An’ the Ugly Elk,” says Forked Tongue, “would tell you this himse’f,
-but he loves you so much it would make his soul sick, an’ so he asks
-me.”
-
-Running Water, who is all truth, does not look for lies in any mouth,
-an’ believes Forked Tongue, an’ resolves for ten sleeps an’ ten wakes
-not to rest his eyes on Ugly Elk.
-
-When Ugly Elk notices how Running Water will not look on him, he chokes
-with anger, for he remembers he is hideous an’ believes that Running
-Water laughs as Forked Tongue has told him. An’ he grows so angry his
-mind is darkened an’ his heart made as night. He seeks out the Forked
-Tongue an’ says:
-
-“Because I am weak with love for him, I cannot kill him with my hands.
-What shall I do, for he must die?”
-
-Then Forked Tongue makes a long think an’ as if he is hard at work
-inside his head. Then he gives this counsel to Ugly Elk:
-
-“Send to your hunters where they are camped by the river. Say to them by
-your runner to seize on him who comes first to them in the morning, an’
-tie him to the big peeled pine an’ burn him to death with wood. When the
-runner is gone, say to Running Water that he must go to the hunters when
-the sun wakes up in the east an’ ask them if they have killed an’ cooked
-the deer you sent them. Since he will be the first to come, the hunters
-will lay hands on Running Water an’ tie him an’ burn him; an’ that will
-put an end to his jests an’ laughter over your ugliness.”
-
-Ugly Elk commands the Antelope, his runner, to hurry with word to
-the hunters to burn him to death who shall come first to them in the
-morning. Then he makes this word to Running Water that he must go to the
-hunters when the sun comes up an’ ask if they have killed an’ cooked
-the deer he sent them. Ugly Elk scowls like a cloud while he gives his
-directions to Running Water, but the boy does not see since his eyes are
-on the ground.
-
-As the sun comes up, Running Water starts with the word of Ugly Elk to
-the hunters. But Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is before him for his safety.
-Moh-Kwa knows that the way to stop a man is with a woman, so he has
-brought a young squaw of the lower Yellowstone who is so beautiful that
-her people named her the Firelight. Moh-Kwa makes the Firelight pitch
-camp where the trail of Running Water will pass as he goes to the
-hunters. An’ the Wise Bear tells her what to say; an’ also to have a
-turkey roasted, an’ a pipe an’ a soft blanket ready for Running Water.
-
-When Running Water sees the Firelight, she is so beautiful he thinks it
-is a dream. An’ when she asks him to eat, an’ fills the redstone pipe
-an’ spreads a blanket for him, the Running Water goes no further.
-He smokes an’ rests on the blanket; an’ because the tobacco is big
-medicine, Running Water falls asleep with his head in the lap of the
-Firelight.
-
-When Forked Tongue knows that Running Water has started for the hunters,
-he waits. Then he thinks:
-
-“Now the hunters, because I have waited long, have already burned
-Running Water. An’ I will go an’ see an’ bring back one of the
-shin-bones to show Ugly Elk that he will never return.”
-
-Forked Tongue travels fast; an’ as he runs by the lodge of the
-Firelight, while it is a new lodge to him, he does not pause, for the
-lodge is closed so that the light will not trouble Running Water where
-he lies asleep with his head in the lap of the Firelight.
-
-Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is behind a tree as Forked Tongue trots past,
-an’ he laughs deep in his hairy bosom; for Moh-Kwa likes revenge, an’ he
-remembers how he was cheated of his bowl of molasses.
-
-Forked Tongue runs by Moh-Kwa like a shadow an’ never sees him, an’
-cannot hear him laugh.
-
-When Forked Tongue comes to the hunters, they put their hands on him an’
-tie him to the peeled pine tree. As they dance an’ shout an’ pile the
-brush an’ wood about him, Forked Tongue glares with eyes full of fear
-an’ asks: “What is this to mean?” The hunters stop dancing an’ say: “It
-means that it is time to sing the death song.” With that they bring fire
-from their camp an’ make a blaze in the twigs an’ brush about Forked
-Tongue; an’ the flames leap up as if eager to be at him--for fire hates
-a liar--an’ in a little time Forked Tongue is burned away an’ only the
-ashes are left an’ the big bones, which are yet white hot.
-
-The sun is sinking when Running Water wakes an’ he is much dismayed;
-but the Firelight cheers him with her dark eyes, an’ Moh-Kwa comes from
-behind the tree an’ gives him good words of wisdom; an’ when he has
-once more eaten an’ drunk an’ smoked, he kisses the Firelight an’ goes
-forward to the hunters as the Ugly Elk said.
-
-[Illustration: 0055]
-
-An’ when he comes to them, he asks:
-
-“Have you killed an’ cooked the deer which was sent you by the Ugly
-Elk?” An’ the hunters laugh an’ say: “Yes; he is killed an’ cooked.”
- Then they take him to the peeled pine tree, an’ tell him of Forked
-Tongue an’ his fate; an’ after cooling a great shin-bone in the river,
-they wrap it in bark an’ grass an’ say:
-
-“Carry that to the Ugly Elk that he may know his deer is killed an’
-cooked.”
-
-While he is returning to Ugly Elk much disturbed, Moh-Kwa tells Running
-Water how Forked Tongue made his evil plan; an both Running Water when
-he hears, an’ Ugly Elk when he hears, can hardly breathe for wonder. An’
-the Ugly Elk cannot speak for his great happiness when now that Running
-Water is still alive an’ has not made a joke of his ugliness nor
-laughed. Also, Ugly Elk gives Moh-Kwa that bowl of molasses of which
-Forked Tongue would cheat him.
-
-The same day, Moh-Kwa brings the Firelight to the lodge of Ugly Elk,
-an’ she an’ Running Water are wed; an’ from that time she dwells in the
-tepee of Running Water, even unto the day when he is named Kill-Bear an’
-made chief after Ugly Elk is no more.
-
-“It is ever,” said the Jolly Doctor, beaming from one to another to
-observe if we enjoyed Sioux Sam’s story with as deep a zest as he did,
-“it is ever a wondrous pleasure to meet with these tales of a primitive
-people. They are as simple as the romaunts invented and told by children
-for the amusement of each other, and yet they own something of a plot,
-though it be the shallowest.”
-
-“Commonly, too, they teach a moral lesson,” spoke up the Sour Gentleman,
-“albeit from what I know of savage morals they would not seem to have
-had impressive effect upon the authors or their Indian listeners. You
-should know something of our Indians?”
-
-Here the Sour Gentleman turned to the Old Cattleman, who was rolling a
-fresh cigar in his mouth as though the taste of tobacco were a delight.
-
-“Me, savey Injuns?” said the Old Cattleman. “Which I knows that much
-about Injuns it gets in my way.”
-
-“What of their morals, then?” asked the Sour Gentleman.
-
-“Plumb base. That is, they’re plumb base when took from a paleface
-standp’int. Lookin’ at ’em with the callous eyes of a savage, I
-reckons now they would mighty likely seem bleached a whole lot.”
-
-Discussion rambled to and fro for a time, and led to a learned
-disquisition on fables from the Jolly Doctor, they being, he said, the
-original literature of the world. With the end of it, however, there
-arose a request that the Sour Gentleman follow the excellent examples of
-the Jolly Doctor and Sioux Sam.
-
-“But I’ve no invention,” complained the Sour Gentleman. “At the best I
-could but give you certain personal experiences of my own; and those,
-let me tell you, are not always to my credit.”
-
-“Now I’ll wager,” spoke up the Red Nosed Gentleman, “now I’ll wager a
-bottle of burgundy--and that reminds me I must send for another, since
-this one by me is empty--that your experiences are quite as glorious as
-my own; and yet, sir,”--here the Red Nosed Gentleman looked hard at the
-Sour Gentleman as though defying him to the tiltyard--“should you favor
-us, I’ll even follow you, and forage in the pages of my own heretofore
-and give you a story myself.”
-
-“That is a frank offer,” chimed in the Jolly Doctor.
-
-“There is no fault to be found with the offer,” said the Sour Gentleman;
-“and yet, I naturally hesitate when those stories of myself, which my
-poverty of imagination would compel me to give you, are not likely to
-grace or lift me in your esteem.”
-
-“And what now do you suppose should be the illustrative virtues of what
-stories I will offer when I tell you I am a reformed gambler?”
-
-This query was put by the Red Nosed Gentleman. The information thrown
-out would seem to hearten the Sour Gentleman not a little.
-
-“Then there will be two black sheep at all events,” said the Sour
-Gentleman.
-
-“Gents,” observed the Old Cattleman, decisively, “if it’ll add to the
-gen’ral encouragement, I’ll say right yere that in Arizona I was allowed
-to be some heinous myse’f. If this is to be a competition in iniquity, I
-aims to cut in on the play.”
-
-“Encouraged,” responded the Sour Gentleman, with just the specter of a
-vinegar smile, “by the assurance that I am like to prove no more ebon
-than my neighbors, I see nothing for it save to relate of the riches
-I made and lost in queer tobacco. I may add, too, that this particular
-incident carries no serious elements of wrong; it is one of my cleanest
-pages, and displays me as more sinned against than sinning.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER IV.--THAT TOBACCO UPSET.
-
-When the war was done and the battle flags of that confederacy which
-had been my sweetheart were rolled tight to their staves and laid away
-in mournful, dusty corners to moulder and be forgot, I cut those buttons
-and gold ends of braid from my uniform, which told of me as a once
-captain of rebels, and turned my face towards New York. I was twenty-one
-at the time; my majority arrived on the day when Lee piled his arms and
-surrendered to Grant at Appomatox. A captain at twenty-one? That was not
-strange, my friends, in a time when boys of twenty-two were wearing the
-wreath of a brigadier. The war was fought by boys, not men;--like every
-other war. Ah! I won my rank fairly, saber in fist; so they all said.
-
-Those were great days. I was with O’Ferrell. There are one hundred miles
-in the Shenandoah, and backwards and forwards I’ve fought on its every
-foot. Towards the last, each day we fought, though both armies could
-see the end. We, for our side, fought with the wrath of despair; the
-Federals, with the glow of triumph in plain sight. Each day we fought;
-for if we did not go riding down the valley hunting Sheridan, the sun
-was never over-high when he rode up the valley hunting us. Those were
-brave days! We fought twice after the war was done. Yes, we knew of
-Richmond’s fall and that the end was come. But what then? There was the
-eager foe; there were we, sullen and ripe and hot with hate. Why should
-we not fight? So it befell that I heard those gay last bugles that
-called down the last grim charge; so it came that I, with my comrades,
-made the last gray line of battle for a cause already lost, and fought
-round the last standards of a confederacy already dead. Those were,
-indeed, good days--those last scenes were filled with the best and
-bravest of either side.
-
-No; I neither regret nor repent the rebellion; nor do I grieve for
-rebellion’s failure. All’s well that well ends, and that carnage left us
-the better for it. For myself, I came honestly by my sentiments of
-the South. I was born in Virginia, of Virginians. One of my youthful
-recollections is how John Brown struck his blow at Harper’s Ferry;
-how Governor Wise called out that company of militia of which I was a
-member; and how, as we stood in the lamp-lighted Richmond streets that
-night, waiting to take the road for Harper’s Ferry, an old grotesque
-farmerish figure rushed excitedly into our midst. How we laughed at the
-belligerent agriculturist! No, he was no farmer; he was Wilkes Booth
-who, with the first whisper of the news, had come hot foot from the
-stage of Ford’s Theater in his costume of that night to have his part
-with us. But all these be other stories, and I started to tell, not of
-the war nor of days to precede it, but about that small crash in tobacco
-wherein I had disastrous part.
-
-When I arrived in New York my hopes were high, as youth’s hopes commonly
-are. But, however high my hope, my pocket was light and my prospects
-nothing. Never will I forget how the mere sensation of the great city
-acted on me like a stimulant. The crowd and the breezy rush of
-things were as wine. Then again, to transplant a man means ever a
-multiplication of spirit. It was so with me; the world and the hour and
-I were all new together, and never have I felt more fervor of enterprise
-than came to me those earliest New York days. But still, I must plan and
-do some practical thing, for my dollars, like the hairs of my head, were
-numbered.
-
-It was my seventh New York morning. As I sat in the café of the Astor
-House, my eye was caught by a news paragraph. The Internal Revenue
-law, with its tax of forty cents a pound on tobacco, had gained a
-construction, and the department’s reading of the law at once claimed my
-hungriest interest. No tobacco grown prior to the crop of ’66 was to
-be affected by the tax; that was the decision.
-
-Aside from my saber-trade as a cavalryman, tobacco was that thing
-whereof I exhaustively knew. I was a tobacco adept from the hour when
-the seed went into the ground, down to the perfumed moment when the
-perfect leaf exhaled in smoke. Moreover, I was aware of a trade matter
-in the nature of a trade secret, which might be made of richest import.
-
-During those five red years of war, throughout the tobacco regions of
-the south, planting and harvesting, though crippled, had still gone
-forward. The fires of battle and the moving lines of troops had only
-streaked those regions; they never wholly covered or consumed them. And
-wherever peace prevailed, the growing of tobacco went on. The harvests
-had been stored; there was no market--no method of getting the tobacco
-out. To be brief, as I read the internal revenue decision above quoted,
-on that Astor House morning, I knew that scattered up and down Virginia
-and throughout the rest of the kindom of tobacco, the crops of full five
-years were lying housed, mouldy and mildewed, for the most part, and
-therefore cheap to whoever came with money in his hands. For an hour I
-sat over my coffee and made a plan.
-
-There was a gentleman, an old college friend of my father. He was rich,
-avoided business and cared only for books. I had made myself known to
-him on the day of my arrival; he had asked me, over a glass of wine,
-to let him hear from me as time and my destinies took unto themselves
-direction. For my tobacco plan I must have money; and I could think of
-no one save my father’s friend of the books.
-
-When I was shown into the old gentleman’s library, I found him deeply
-held with Moore’s Life of Byron. As he greeted me, he kept the volume in
-his left hand with finger shut in the page. Evidently he trusted that I
-would not remain long and that he might soon return to his reading.
-
-The situation chilled me; I began my story with slight belief that its
-end would be fortunate. I exposed my tobacco knowledge, laid bare my
-scheme of trade, and craved the loan of five thousand dollars on the
-personal security--not at all commercial--of an optimist of twenty-one,
-whose only employment had been certain boot-and-saddle efforts to
-overthrow the nation. I say, I had scant hope of obtaining the aid I
-quested. I suffered disappointment. I was dealing with a gentleman who,
-however much he might grudge me a few moments taken from Byron, was
-willing enough to help me with money. In truth, he seemed relieved
-when he had heard me through; and he at once signed a check with a fine
-flourish, and I came from his benevolent presence equipped for those
-tobacco experiments I contemplated.
-
-It is not required that I go with filmy detail into a re-count of my
-enterprise. I began safely and quietly; with my profits I extended
-myself; and at the end of eighteen months, I had so pushed affairs that
-I was on the highway to wealth and the firm station of a millionaire.
-
-I had personally and through my agents bought up those five entire
-war-crops of tobacco. Most of it was still in Virginia and the south,
-due to my order; much of it had been already brought to New York. By the
-simple process of steaming and vaporizing, I removed each trace of mould
-and mildew, and under my skillful methods that war tobacco emerged upon
-the market almost as sweet and hale as the best of our domestic stock;
-and what was vastly in its favor, its flavor was, if anything, a trifle
-mild.
-
-In that day of leaf tobacco, the commodity was marketed in
-one-hundred-pound bales. My bales were made with ninety-two pounds of
-war tobacco, sweated free of any touch of mildew; and eight pounds of
-new tobacco, the latter on the outside for the sake of color and looks.
-Thus you may glimpse somewhat the advantage I had. Where, at forty cents
-a pound, the others paid on each bale of tobacco a revenue charge of
-forty dollars, I, with only eight pounds of new tobacco, paid but three
-dollars and twenty cents. And I had cornered the exempted tobacco. Is it
-wonder I began to wax rich?
-
-Often I look over my account books of those brilliant eighteen months.
-When I read that news item on the Astor House morning I’ve indicated,
-I had carefully modeled existence to a supporting basis of ten dollars a
-week. When eighteen months later there came the crash, I was permitting
-unto my dainty self a rate of personal expenditure of over thirty
-thousand dollars a year. I had apartments up-town; I was a member of
-the best clubs; I was each afternoon in the park with my carriage;
-incidentally I was languidly looking about among the Vere de Veres of
-the old Knickerbockers for that lady who, because of her superlative
-beauty and wit and modesty coupled with youth and station, was worthy to
-be my wife. Also, I recall at this period how I was conceitedly content
-with myself; how I gave way to warmest self-regard; pitied others as
-dullards and thriftless blunderers; and privily commended myself as
-a very Caesar of Commerce and the one among millions. Alas! “Pride
-goeth”--you have read the rest!
-
-It was a bright October afternoon. My cometlike career had subsisted for
-something like a year and a half; and I, the comet, was growing in
-size and brilliancy as time fled by. My tobacco works proper were over
-towards the East River in a brick warehouse I had leased; to these,
-which were under the superintendence of a trusty and expert adherent
-whom I had brought north from Richmond, I seldom repaired. My
-offices--five rooms, fitted and furnished to the last limit of rosewood
-and Russia leather magnificence--were down-town.
-
-On this particular autumn afternoon, as I went forth to my brougham for
-a roll to my apartments, the accountant placed in my hands a statement
-which I’d asked for and which with particular exactitude set forth my
-business standing. I remember it exceeding well. As I trundled up-town
-that golden afternoon, I glanced at those additions and subtractions
-which told my opulent story. Briefly, my liabilities were ninety
-thousand dollars; and I was rich in assets to a money value of three
-hundred and twelve thousand dollars. The ninety thousand was or would
-be owing on my tobacco contracts south, and held those tons on tons of
-stored, mildewed war tobacco, solid to my command. As I read the totals
-and reviewed the items, I would not have paid a penny of premium to
-insure my future. There it was in black and white. I knew what I had
-done; I knew what I could do. I was master of the tobacco situation for
-the next three years to come. By that time, I would have worked up the
-entire fragrant stock of leaf exempt from the tax; also by that time, I
-would count my personal fortune at a shadow over three millions. There
-was nothing surer beneath the sun. At twenty-six I would retire from
-trade and its troubles; life would lie at my toe like a kick-ball, and
-I would own both the wealth and the supple youth to pursue it into every
-nook and corner of pleasurable experience. Thus ran my smug reflections
-as I rolled northward along Fifth avenue to dress for dinner on that
-bright October day.
-
-It was the next afternoon, and I had concluded a pleasant lunch in my
-private office when Mike, my personal and favorite henchman, announced
-a visitor. The caller desired to see me on a subject both important and
-urgent.
-
-“Show him in!” I said.
-
-There slouched into the room an awkward-seeming man of middle age;
-not poor, but roughly dressed. No one would have called him a fop; his
-clothes, far astern of the style, fitted vilely; while his head, never
-beautiful, was made uglier with a shock of rudely exuberant hair and
-a stubby beard like pig’s bristles. It was an hour when there still
-remained among us, savages who oiled their hair; this creature was one;
-and I remember how the collar of his rusty surtout shone like glass with
-the dripped grease.
-
-My ill-favored visitor accepted the chair Mike placed for him and
-perched uneasily on its edge. When we were alone, I brought him and his
-business to instant bay. I was anxious to free myself of his presence.
-His bear’s grease and jaded appearance bred a distaste of him.
-
-“What is it you want?” My tones were brittle and sharp.
-
-The uncouth caller leered at me with a fashion of rancid leer--I
-suppose even a leer may have a flavor. Then he opened with obscure
-craft--vaguely, foggily. He wanted to purchase half my business. He
-would take an account of stock; give me exact money for one-half its
-value; besides, he would pay me a bonus of fifty thousand dollars.
-
-If this unkempt barbarian had come squarely forth and told me his whole
-story; if, in short, I had known who he was and whom he came from, there
-would have grown no trouble. I would have gulped and swallowed the
-pill; we would have dealt; I’d have had a partner and been worth one and
-one-half million instead of three millions when my fortune was made.
-But he didn’t. He shuffled and hinted and leered, and said over and over
-again as he repeated his offer:
-
-“You need a partner.”
-
-But beyond this he did not go; and of this I could make nothing, and I
-felt nothing save a cumulative resentment that kept growing the larger
-the longer he stayed. I told him I desired none of his partnership. I
-told him this several divers times; and each time with added vigor and
-a rising voice. To the last he persistently and leeringly retorted his
-offer; always concluding, like another Cato, with his eternal Delenda
-est Carthago.
-
-“You need a partner!”
-
-Even my flatterers have never painted me as patient, and at twenty-three
-my pulse beat swift and hot. And it came to pass that on the heels of an
-acrid ten minutes of my visitor, I brought him bluntly up.
-
-“Go!” I said. “I’ve heard all I care to hear. Go; or I’ll have you shown
-the door!”
-
-It was of no avail; the besotted creature held his ground.
-
-I touched a bell; the faithful Mike appeared. It took no more than a
-wave of the hand; Mike had studied me and knew my moods. At once he fell
-upon the invader and threw him down stairs with all imaginable spirit.
-
-Thereupon I breathed with vast relief, had the windows lifted because of
-bear’s grease that tainted the air, and conferred on the valorous Celt a
-reward of two dollars.
-
-Who was this ill-combed, unctuous, oily, cloudy, would-be partner? He
-was but a messenger; two months before he had resigned a desk in the
-Washington Treasury--for appearances only--to come to me and make the
-proffer. After Mike cast him forth, he brushed the dust from his knees
-and returned to Washington and had his treasury desk again. He was
-a mere go-between. The one he stood for and whose plans he sought to
-transact was a high official of revenue. This latter personage, of whose
-plotting identity back in the shadows I became aware only when it was
-too late, noting my tobacco operations and their profits and hawk-hungry
-for a share, had sent me the offer of partnership. I regret, for my
-sake as well as his own, that he did not pitch upon a more sagacious
-commissioner.
-
-Now fell the bolt of destruction. The morning following Mike’s turgid
-exploits with my visitor, I was met in the office door by the manager.
-His face was white and his eyes seemed goggled and fixed as if their
-possessor had been planet-struck. I stared at him.
-
-“Have you read the news?” he gasped.
-
-“What news?”
-
-“Have you not read of the last order?”
-
-Over night--for my visitor, doubtless, wired his discomfiture--the
-Revenue Department had reversed its decision of two years before. The
-forty cents per pound of internal revenue would from that moment be
-demanded and enforced against every leaf of tobacco then or thereafter
-to become extant; and that, too, whether its planting and its reaping
-occurred inter arma or took place beneath the pinions of wide-spreading
-peace. The revenue office declared that its first ruling, exempting
-tobacco grown during the war, had been taken criminal advantage of; and
-that thereby the nation in its revenue rights had been sorely defeated
-and pillaged by certain able rogues--meaning me. Therefore, this new
-rule of revenue right and justice.
-
-Now the story ends. Under these changed, severe conditions, when I was
-made to meet a tax of forty dollars where I’d paid less than a tithe of
-it before, I was helpless. I couldn’t, with my inferior tobacco, engage
-on even terms against the new tobacco and succeed. My strength had dwelt
-in my power to undersell. This power was departed away; my locks as a
-Sampson were shorn.
-
-But why spin out the hideous story? My market was choked up; a cataract
-of creditors came upon me; my liabilities seemed to swell while my
-assets grew sear and shrunken. Under the shaking jolt of that last new
-revenue decision, my fortunes came tumbling like a castle of cards.
-
-After three months, I dragged myself from beneath the ruin of my affairs
-and stood--rather totteringly--on my feet again. I was out of business.
-I counted up my treasure and found myself, debtless and unthreatened,
-master of some twenty thousand dollars.
-
-And what then? Twenty thousand dollars is not so bad. It is not three
-millions; nor even half of three millions; but when all is said, twenty
-thousand is not so bad! I gave up my rich apartments, sold my horses,
-looked no more for a female Vere de Vere with intent her to espouse, and
-turned to smuggling. I had now a personal as well as a regional grudge
-against government. The revenue had cheated me; I would in revenge
-cheat the revenue. I became a smuggler. That, however, is a tale to tell
-another day.
-
-*****
-
-“And now,” observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, dipping deeply into his
-burgundy, as if for courage, “I’ll even keep my promise. I’ll tell a
-story of superstition and omen; also how I turned in my infancy to cards
-as a road to wealth. Cards as a method to arrive by riches is neither
-splendid nor respectable, but I shall make no apologies. I give you the
-story of The Sign of The Three.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER V.--THE SIGN OF THREE.
-
-Such confession may come grotesquely enough from one of education
-and substance, yet all the day long I’ve been thinking on omens and on
-prophecies. It was my servant who brought it about. He, poor wretch!
-appeared in my chamber this morning with brows of terror and eyes of
-gloom. He had consulted a gypsy sorceress, whom the storm drove to cover
-in this tavern, and crossed the palm of her greed with a silver dollar
-to be told that he would die within the year. Information hardly worth
-the fee, truly! And the worst is, the shrinking fool believes the
-forebode and is already set about mending his lean estates for the
-change. What is still more strange, I, too, regard the word of this
-snow-blown witch--whoever the hag may be--and can no more eject her
-prophecies from my head than can the scared victim of them.
-
-This business of superstition--a weakness for the supernatural--belongs
-with our bone and blood. Reason is no shield from its assaults. Look at
-Sir Thomas More; chopped on Tower Hill because he would believe that the
-blessed wafers became of the Savior’s actual flesh and blood! And
-yet, Sir Thomas wrote that most thoughtful of works, “Utopia,” and
-was cunning enough of a hard-headed politics to succeed Wolsey as
-Chancellor.
-
-Doubtless my bent to be superstitious came to me from my father. He
-was a miner; worked and lived on Tom’s Run; and being from Wales, and
-spending his days in gloomy caverns of coal, held to those fantastic
-beliefs of his craft in elves and gnomes and brownies and other
-malignant, small folk of Demonland. However, it becomes not me to find
-fault with my ancestor nor speak lightly of his foibles. He was a most
-excellent parent; and it is one of my comforts, and one which neither my
-money nor my ease could bring, that I was ever a good son.
-
-As I say, my father was a miner of coal. Each morning while the mines
-were open, lamp in hat, he repaired deep within the tunneled belly of
-the hill across from our cottage and with pick and blast delved the day
-long. This mine was what is called a “rail mine,” and closed down its
-work each autumn to resume again in the spring. These beginnings and
-endings of mine activities depended on the opening and closing of
-navigation along the Great Lakes. When the lakes were open, the mines
-were open; when November’s ice locked up the lakes, it locked up the
-mines as well, and my father and his fellows of the lamp were perforce
-idle until the warmth of returning spring again freed the keels and
-south breezes refilled the sails of commerce. As this gave my father but
-five to six months work a year; and as--at sixty cents a ton and pay for
-powder, oil, fuse and blacksmithing--he could make no more than forty
-dollars a month, we were poor enough.
-
-Even the scant money he earned we seldom really fingered. The little
-that was not cheated out of my father’s hands by the sins of diamond
-screens and untrue weights and other company tricks, was pounced on in
-advance by the harpies of “company store” and “company cottage,” and
-what coins came to our touch never soared above the mean dignity of
-copper. Poor we were! a family of groats and farthings! poor as Lamb’s
-“obolary Jew!”
-
-It is not worth while for what I have in mind to dwell in sad extent on
-the struggles of my father or the aching shifts we made in my childhood
-to feed and clothe the life within our bodies. And yet, in body at
-least, I thrived thereby. I grew up strong and muscular; I boxed,
-wrestled and ran; was proficient as an athlete, and among other feats
-and for a slight wager--which was not made with my money, I warrant
-you!--swam eighteen miles in fresh water one Sunday afternoon.
-
-While my muscles did well enough, our poverty would have starved my mind
-were it not for the parish priest. The question of books and schools for
-me was far beyond my father’s solution; he was eager that I be educated,
-but the emptiness of the family fisc forbade. It was then the good
-parish priest stepped forward and took me in earnest hand. Father
-Glennon deemed himself no little of an athlete, and I now believe that
-it was my supremacy in muscle among the boys of my age that first drew
-his eyes to me. Be that as it may, he took my schooling on himself;
-and night and day while I abode on Tom’s Run--say until my seventeenth
-year--I was as tightly bound to the priest’s books as ever Prometheus to
-his rock. And being a ready lad, I did my preceptor proud.
-
-The good priest is dead now; I sought to put a tall stone above him but
-the bishop refused because it was too rich a mark for the dust of an
-humble priest. I had my way in part, however; I bought the plot just
-across the narrow gravel walk from the grave that held my earliest, best
-friend, and there, registering on its smooth white surface my debt to
-Father Glennon, stands the shaft. I carved on it no explanation of the
-fact that it is only near and not over my good priest’s bones. Those
-who turn curious touching that matter may wend to the bishop or to the
-sexton, and I now and then hear that they do.
-
-No; I did not go into the coal holes. My father forbade it, and I lacked
-the inclination as well. By nature I was a speculator, a gambler if you
-will. I like uncertainties; I would not lend money at five hundred per
-cent., merely because one knows in advance the measure of one’s risks
-and profits. I want a chance to win and a chance to lose; for I hold
-with the eminent gamester Charles Fox that while to win offers the
-finest sensation of which the human soul is capable, the next finest
-comes when you lose. Congenitally I was a courtier of Fortune and a
-follower of the gospel of chance. And this inborn mood has carried me
-through a score of professions until, as I tell you this, I have grown
-rich and richer as a stock speculator, and hang over the markets a pure
-gambler of the tape. I make no apology; I simply point to the folk who
-surround me.
-
-My vocation of a gambler--for what else shall one call a speculator of
-stocks?--has doubtless fattened my tendencies towards the superstitious.
-I’ve witnessed much surely, that should go to their strengthening. Let
-me tell you a story somewhat in line with the present current of my
-thoughts; it may reach some distance to teach you with Horatio that
-there be more things in heaven and earth than are dreamed of in our
-philosophy. After all, it is the cold record of one of a hundred score
-of incidents that encourage my natural belief in the occult.
-
-*****
-
-There is a gentleman of stocks--I’ve known him twenty years--and he
-has a weakness for the numeral three. Just how far his worship of that
-sacred number enters into his business life no one may certainly tell;
-he is secretive and cautious and furnishes no evidence on the point that
-may be covered up. Yet this weakness, if one will call it so, crops up
-in sundry fashions. His offices are suite three, in number thirty-three
-Blank street; his telephones are 333 and 3339 respectively; his great
-undertakings are invariably deferred in their commencements until the
-third of the month.
-
-His peculiar and particular fetich, however, is a chain of three hundred
-and thirty-three gold beads. It is among the wonders of the street.
-This was made for him and under his direction by Tiffany, and cost one
-workman something over a year of his life in its construction. It is
-all hand and hammer work, this chain; and on each bead is drawn with
-delicate and finished art a gypsy girl’s head. Under a microscope this
-gypsy face is perfect and the entire jewel worthy the boast of the
-Tiffany house as a finest piece of goldbeater’s work turned out in
-modern times.
-
-It is a listless, warm evening at the Fifth Avenue Hotel. Our believer
-in “Three” is gathered casually with two of his friends. There is no
-business abroad; those missions which called our gentleman of the gypsy
-chain up-town are all discharged; he is off duty--unbuckled, as it
-were, in cheerful, light converse over a bottle of wine. Let us name our
-friend of the Three, “James of the Beads;” while his duo of comrades may
-be Reed and Rand respectively.
-
-Such is man’s inconsistency that James of the Beads is railing at Reed
-who has told--with airs of veneration if not of faith--of a “system,”
- that day laid bare to him, warranted to discover in excellent rich
-advance, the names of the winning horses in next day’s races. James of
-the Beads laughs, while Reed feebly defends his credulity in lending the
-countenance of half belief to the “system” he describes.
-
-Then a sudden impulse takes James of the Beads. His face grows grave
-while his eye shows deepest thought.
-
-“To-morrow is the third of the month?” observes James of the Beads. Now
-with emphasis: “Gentlemen, I’ll show you how to select a horse.” Then
-to Reed, who holds in his hands the racing list: “Look for to-morrow’s
-third race!” Reed finds it.
-
-“What is the third horse?”
-
-“Roysterer.”
-
-“Roysterer!” repeats James of the Beads. “Good! There are nine letters
-in the name; three syllables; three r’s!”
-
-Then James of the Beads seizes with both hands, in a sort of ecstatic
-catch as catch can, on the gypsy chain of magic. He holds a bead between
-the thumb and fore-finger of each hand. Softly he counts the little
-yellow globes between.
-
-“Thirty-three!” ejaculates James of the Beads. Deeper lights begin to
-shine in his eye. One test of the chain, however, is not enough. He must
-make three. A second time he takes a bead between each fore-finger and
-thumb; on this trial the two beads are farther apart. Again he counts,
-feeling each golden bullet with his finger’s tip as the tally proceeds.
-
-“Sixty-six!”
-
-There arrives a glow on the brow of James of the Beads to keep
-company with the gathering sparkle of his eye. The questioning of the
-witch-chain goes on. Again he seizes the beads; again he tells the
-number.
-
-“Ninety-nine!”
-
-The prophecy is made; the story of success is foretold. James of the
-Beads is on fire; he springs to his feet. Rand and Reed regard him in
-silence, curiously. He walks to a window and sharply gazes out on the
-lamp-sprinkled evening.
-
-“Twenty-third street! Fifth avenue! Broadway!” he mutters. “Still
-three--always three!”
-
-Unconsciously James of the Beads seeks the window-shade with his hand.
-He would raise it a trifle; it is low and interrupts the eye as he
-stands gazing into the trio of thoroughfares. The tassel he grasps is
-old and comes off in his fingers. James of the Beads turns his glance on
-the tassel.
-
-“That, too, has its meaning,” says James of the Beads, “if only we might
-read it.”
-
-The tassel is a common, poor creature of worsted yarns and strands
-wrapped about a clumsy mold of wood. James of the Beads scans it
-narrowly as it lies in his hand. At last he turns it, and the fringe
-falls away from the wooden mold. There is a little “3” burned upon the
-wood. James of the Beads exhibits this sacred sign to Reed and Rand;
-the while his excited interest deepens. Then he counts the strands of
-worsted which constitute the fringe. There are eighty-one!
-
-“Three times three times three times three!” and James of the Beads
-draws a deep breath.
-
-Who might resist these spectral manifestations of “Three!” James of the
-Beads turns from the window like one whose decision is made. Without
-a word he takes a slip of paper from his pocket book and going to the
-table writes his name on its back. It is a pleasant-seeming paper, this
-slip; and pleasantly engraved and written upon. No less is it than a New
-York draft drawn on the City National Bank by a leading Chicago concern
-for an even one hundred thousand dollars. James of the Beads places it
-in the hands of Rand.
-
-“To-morrow should be the luckiest of days,” says James of the Beads.
-“I must not lose it. I must consider to-morrow and arrange to set afoot
-certain projects which I’ve had in train for some time. As to the races,
-Rand, take the draft and put it all on Roysterer.”
-
-“Man alive!” remonstrates the amazed Rand; “it’s too much on one horse!
-Moreover, I won’t have time to get all that money down.”
-
-“Get down what you can then,” commands James of the Beads. “Plunge!
-Have no fears! I tell you, so surely as the sun comes up, Roysterer will
-win.”
-
-“The wise ones don’t think so,” urges Rand, who is not wedded to the
-mystic “Three,” and beholds nothing wondrous in that numeral. “This
-Roysterer is a seven for one shot.”
-
-“And the better for us,” retorts James of the Beads. “Roysterer is to
-win.”
-
-“But wouldn’t it be wiser to split this money and play part of it on
-Roysterer for a place?”
-
-“Never!” declares James of the Beads. “Do you suppose I don’t know what
-I’m about? I’m worth a million for each year of my life, and I made
-every stiver of it by the very method I take to discover this horse.
-Can’t you see that I’m not guessing?--that I have reason for what I do?
-Roysterer for a place! Never! get down every splinter that Roysterer
-finishes first.”
-
-“Let me ask one question,” observes the cautious Rand. “Do you know the
-horse?”
-
-“Never heard of the animal in my life!” remarks James of the Beads,
-pouring himself a complacent glass. This he tastes approvingly. “You
-must pardon me, my friends, I’ve got to write a note or two. I’ve not
-too much time for a man with twenty things to do, and who must be in the
-street when business opens to-morrow. Take my word for it; get all you
-can on Roysterer. If we win, we’re partners; if we lose, I’m alone.”
-
-Rand shakes sage, experienced head, while his face gathers a cynical
-look.
-
-Reed and Rand take James of the Beads by the hand and then withdraw.
-
-“What do you make of it?” asks Rand.
-
-“The man’s infatuated!” replies Reed.
-
-“And yet, you also believe in systems,” remarks Rand.
-
-It is the next afternoon. The Brighton course is rampant with the usual
-jostling, pushing, striving, guessing, knowing, wagering, winning,
-losing, ignorant, exulting, deploring, profane crowd. The conservative
-Rand has so far obeyed the behest of James of the Beads that he has
-fifteen thousand dollars on Roysterer straight.
-
-“To lose fifteen thousand won’t hurt him,” says Rand, and so consoles
-himself for a mad speculation whereof he has no joy.
-
-Reed and Rand, as taking life easily, are in a box; the race over which
-their interest clings and clambers is called.
-
-The horses are at the post. Roysterer does not act encouragingly; he is
-too sleepy--too lethargic! Starlight, the favorite, steps about, alert
-and springy as a cat; it should be an easy race for her if looks go for
-aught.
-
-They get the word; they are “off!” The field sweeps ’round the curve.
-A tall man in a nearby box follows the race with a glass.
-
-“At the quarter,” sings the tall man. “Starlight first, Blenheim second,
-Roysterer third!” There is a pause. Then the tall man: “At the half!
-Starlight first, Blenheim second, Roysterer third!” Rand turns to Reed.
-“He must better that,” says Rand, “or he’ll explode the superstition
-of our friend.” There is a wait of twenty-five seconds. Again the tall,
-binoculared man: “Three-quarter post! Starlight first, Blenheim second,
-Roysterer third--and whipping!”
-
-“It’s as good as over,” observes Rand. “I wonder what James of the Beads
-will say to his witch-chain when he hears the finish.”
-
-“It’s surprising,” remarks Reed peevishly, “that a man of his force
-and clear intelligence should own to such a weakness! All his life he’s
-followed this marvelous ‘Three’ about; and having had vast success
-he attributes it to the ‘Three,’ when he might as well and as wisely
-ascribe it to Captain Kidd or Trinity church. To-day’s results may cure
-him; and that’s one comfort.”
-
-There is a sharp click as the tall man in the nearby box shuts up his
-glasses.
-
-“Roysterer wins!” says the tall man.
-
-“Got down fifteen thousand. Won one hundred and five thousand,” reads
-James of the Beads from Rand’s telegram sent from the track. James of
-the Beads is in his offices; he has just finished a victorious day, at
-once heavy and tumultuous with the buying and the selling of full three
-hundred thousand shares of stocks. “They should have wagered the full
-one hundred thousand and let the odds look after themselves,” he says.
-Then James of the Beads begins to caress the gypsy chain. “You knew,”
- he murmurs; “of course, you knew!” There is a note of devotion in the
-tones. The bead-worship goes on for a silent moment. “Only one hundred
-and five thousand!” ruminates James of the Beads. “I suppose Rand was
-afraid!”
-
-“That is indeed a curious story,” observed the Jolly Doctor, when the
-Red Nosed Gentleman, being done with James of the Beads, was returning
-to his burgundy; “and did it really happen?”
-
-“Of a verity, did it,” returned the Red Nosed Gentleman. “I was Rand.”
-
-Conversation fluttered from one topic to another for a brief space,
-but dealt mainly with those divers superstitions that folk affect. When
-signs and omens were worn out, the Jolly Doctor turned upon the Old
-Cattleman as though to remind that ancient practitioner of cows how it
-would be now his right to uplift us with a reminiscence.
-
-“No, I don’t need to be told it none,” said the Old Cattleman. “On the
-principle of freeze-out, it’s shore got down to me. Seein’ how this yere
-snow reminds me a heap of Christmas, I’ll onload on you-all how we’re
-aroused an’ brought to a realisin’ sense of that season of gifts once
-upon a time in Wolfville.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER VI.--THAT WOLFVILLE CHRISTMAS.
-
-This yere can’t be called a story; which it can’t even be described
-none as a sketch. Accordin’ to the critics, who, bein’ plumb onable
-to write one themse’fs, nacherally knows what a story ought to be, no
-story’s a story onless she’s built up like one of these one-sided hills.
-Reelation must climb painfully from base to peak, on the slope side,
-with interest on a up-grade, say, of one foot in ten; an’ then when
-you-all arrives safely at the summit, the same bein’ the climax, you’re
-to pitch headlong over the precipice on the sheer an’ other side, an’
-in the space of not more’n a brace of sentences, land, bing! bang!
-smash!--all broke up at the bottom. That, by what you-all might call
-“Our best literary lights,” would be a story, an’ since what I’m about
-to onfold don’t own no sech brands nor y’ear-marks, it can’t come onder
-that head.
-
-This partic’lar o’casion is when little Enright Peets Tutt--said blessed
-infant, as I sets forth former, bein’ the conj’int production of Dave
-Tutt an’ his esteemable wife, Tucson Jennie--is comin’ eight years old
-next spring round-up. Little Enright Peets is growin’ strong an’ husky
-now, an’ is the pride of the Wolfville heart. He’s shed his milk teeth
-an’ is sproutin’ a second mouthful, white an’ clean as a coyote’s. Also,
-his cur’osity is deeveloped powerful an’ he’s in the habit of pervadin’
-about from the Red Light to the New York Store, askin’ questions; an’ he
-is as familiar in the local landscape as either the Tucson stage or Old
-Monte, the drunkard who drives it.
-
-One afternoon, about first drink time, little Enright Peets comes
-waddlin’ up to Old Man Enright on them short reedic’lous black-b’ar
-laigs of his, an’ says:
-
-“Say, gran’dad Enright, don’t you-all cim-marons never have no Christmas
-in this camp? Which if you does, all I got to say is I don’t notice no
-Christmas none since I’ve been yere, an’ that’s whatever!”
-
-[Illustration: 0091]
-
-“Will you-all listen to this preecocious child!” observes Enright to
-Doc Peets, with whom he’s in talk. “Wherever now do you reckon, Doc, he
-hears tell of Christmas?”
-
-“How about it, Uncle Doc?” asks little Enright Peets, turnin’ his eyes
-up to Peets when he notices Enright don’t reply.
-
-At this Enright an’ Peets makes a disparin’ gesture an’ wheels into the
-Red Light for a drink, leavin’ pore little Enright Peets standin’ in the
-street.
-
-“That baby puts us to shame, Doc,” says Enright, as he signs up to Black
-Jack, the barkeep, for the Valley Tan; “he shows us in one word how
-we neglects his eddication. The idee of that child never havin’ had
-no Christmas! It’s more of a stain on this commoonity than not hangin’
-Navajo Joe that time.”
-
-“That’s whatever!” assents Peets, reachin’ for the nose-paint in his
-turn. “‘Out of the mouths of babes an’ sucklin’s,’ as the good book
-says.” This infantile bluff of little Enright Peets goes a long way
-to stir up the sensibilities of the public. As for Enright, he don’t
-scroople to take Dave Tutt to task.
-
-“The thought that you, Dave,” says Enright, “you, a gent I yeretofore
-regyards as distinguished for every paternal virchoo, would go romancin’
-along, lettin’ that boy grow up in darkness of Christmas, an’ it one of
-the first festivals of the Christian world! As a play, I says freely,
-that sech neglect is plumb too many for me!”
-
-“She’s shore a shame,” adds Dan Boggs, who’s also shocked a heap, and
-stands in with Enright to crawl Dave’s hump, “she’s shore a shame, never
-to provide no Christmas for that offspring of yours, an’ leave him to go
-knockin’ about in his ignorance like a blind dog in a meat shop. That’s
-what I states; she’s a shame!”
-
-“Now gents,” reemonstrates Dave, “don’t press the limit in these yere
-reecrim’nations, don’t crowd me too hard. I asks you, whatever could I
-do? If you-all enthoosiasts will look this yere Christmas proposition
-ca’mly in the face, you’ll begin to notice that sech cel’brations ain’t
-feasible in Arizona. Christmas in its very beginnin’ is based on snow.
-Who’s the reg’lar round-up boss for Christmas? Ain’t he a disrepootable
-Dutchman named Santa Claus? Don’t he show up wrapped in furs, an’ with
-reindeer an’ sleigh an’ hock deep in a snowstorm? Answer me that? Also
-show me where’s your snow an’ where’s your sleigh an’ where’s your
-reindeer an’ where’s your Dutchman in Wolfville? You-all better go
-about Jixin’ up your camp an’ your climate so as to make one of these
-Christmases possible before ever you come buttin’ in, cavilin’ an’
-criticisin’ ag’in me as a parent.”
-
-“Which jest the same, Dave,” contends Dan, who takes the eepisode mighty
-sour, “it looks like you-all could have made some sort o’ play.”
-
-About this time, as addin’ itse’f to the gen’ral jolt given the
-Wolfville nerve by them Christmas questions put aforesaid by little
-Enright Peets, news comes floatin’ over from Red Dog of a awful
-spree that low-flung outfit enjoys. It’s a Six Shooter Weddin’; so
-deenominated because Pete Bland, the outlaw for whom the party is made,
-an’ his wife, The Duchess, has been married six years an’ ain’t
-done nothin’ but fight. Wherefore, on the sixth anniversary of their
-nuptials, Red Dog resolves on a Six Shooter Weddin’; an’ tharupon
-descends on those two wedded warriors, Pete an’ The Duchess, in a body,
-packin’ fiddles, nose-paint, an’ the complete regalia of a frantic
-shindig. An’ you hear me, gents, them Red Dog tarrapins shore throws
-themse’fs loose! You-all could hear their happy howls in Wolfville.
-
-As a reason for the outburst, an’ one consistent with its name, the
-guests endows Pete an’ The Duchess each with belts an’ a brace of guns.
-
-“To the end,” says the Red Dog cha’rman when he makes the presentation
-speech, “that, as between Pete an’ The Duchess, we as a commoonity
-promotes a even break, and clothes both parties in interest with equal
-powers to preserve the peace.”
-
-As I observes, it’s the story of these proud doin’s on the locoed part
-of our rival, that ondoubted goes some distance to decide us Wolves of
-Wolfville on pullin’ off a Christmas warjig for little Enright Peets. We
-ain’t goin’ to be outdone none in this business of being fervid.
-
-It’s mebby a month prior to Christmas when we resolves on this yere
-racket, an’ so we has ample time to prepare. Almost every afternoon an’
-evenin’ over our Valley Tan, we discusses an’ does our wisest to
-evolve a programme. It’s then we begins to grasp the wisdom of Dave’s
-observations touchin’ how onfeasible it is to go talkin’ of Christmas in
-southern Arizona.
-
-“Nacherally,” remarks Enright, as we sits about the Red Light, turnin’
-the game in our minds, “nacherally, we ups an’ gives little Enright
-Peets presents. Which brings us within ropin’ distance of the inquiry,
-‘Whatever will we give him?’”
-
-“We-all can’t give him fish-lines, an’ sech,” says Doc Peets, takin’ up
-Enright’s argument, “for thar ain’t no fish. Skates is likewise barred,
-thar bein’ no ice; an’ sleds an’ mittens an’ worsted comforters an’ fur
-caps fails us for causes sim’lar. Little Enright Peets is too young to
-smoke; Tucson Jennie won’t let him drink licker; thar, with one word, is
-them two important sources closed ag’in us. Gents, Pm inclined to string
-my bets with Dave; I offers two for one as we sets yere, that this
-framin’ up a Christmas play in Arizona as a problem ain’t no slouch.”
-
-“Thar’s picture books,” says Faro Nell.
-
-“Shore!” assents Cherokee Hall, where he’s planted back of his faro box.
-
-“An’ painted blocks!”
-
-“Good!” says Cherokee.
-
-“An’ candy!”
-
-“Nell’s right!” an’ Cherokee coincides plumb through, “Books, blocks,
-an’ candy, is what I calls startin’ on velvet.”
-
-“Whatever’s the matter,” says Dan Boggs, who’s been rackin’ his
-intellects a heap, “of givin’ little Enright Peets a faro layout,
-or mebby now, a roolette wheel? Some of them wheels is mighty gaudy
-furniture!”
-
-“Dan,” says Enright, an’ his tones is severe; “Dan, be you-all aimin’ to
-corrupt this child?” Dan subsides a whole lot after this yere reproof.
-
-“I don’t reckon now,” observes Jack Moore, an’ his manner is as one
-ropin’ for information; “I don’t reckon now a nice, wholesome Colt’s-44,
-ivory butt, stamped leather belts, an’ all that, would be a proper thing
-to put in play. Of course, a 8-inch gun is some heavy as a plaything for
-a infant only seven; but he’d grow to it, gents, he’d grow to it.”
-
-“Don’t alloode to sech a thing, Jack,” says Dan, with a shudder; “don’t
-alloode to it. Little Enright Peets would up an’ blow his yoothful light
-out; an’ then Tucson Jennie would camp on our trails forevermore as the
-deestroyers of her child. The mere idee gives me the fantods!” An’ Dan,
-who’s a nervous party, shudders ag’in.
-
-“Gents,” says Texas Thompson, “I ain’t cut in on this talk for two
-reasons: one is I ain’t had nothin’ to say; an’ ag’in, it was Christmas
-Day when my Laredo wife--who I once or twice adverts to as gettin’ a
-divorce--ups an’ quits me for good. For which causes it has been my
-habit to pass up all mention an’ mem’ry of this sacred season in a
-sperit of silent pra’r. But time has so far modified my feelin’s that,
-considerin’ the present purposes of the camp, I’m willin’ to be heard.
-Thar’s nothin’ that should be looked to more jealously than this ye re
-givin’ of presents. It’s grown so that as a roole the business of makin’
-presents degen’rates to this: Some sport who can’t afford to, gives some
-sport something he don’t need. Thar’s no fear of the first, since we
-gents can afford anything we likes. As to the second prop’sition, we
-should skin our kyards some sharp. We-all ought to lavish on little
-Enright Peets a present which, while safegyardin’ his life an’ his
-morals, is calc’lated to teach him some useful accomplishments. Books,
-blocks, an sweetmeats, as proposed by our fac’natin’ townswoman, Miss
-Faro Nell”--Nell tosses Texas a kiss--“is in admir’ble p’int as
-coverin’ a question of amooze-ments. For the rest, an’ as makin’ for the
-deevel-opment of what will be best in the character of little Enright
-Peets, I moves you we-all turns in an’ buys that baby the best
-bronco--saddle, bridle, rope an’ spurs, complete--that the southwest
-affords.”
-
-Texas, who’s done stood up to make this yere oration, camps down ag’in
-in the midst of a storm of applause. The su’gestion has immediate
-adoption.
-
-We-all gives a cold thousand for the little boss. We gets him of the
-sharp who--it bein’ in the old day before railroads--is slammin’ through
-the mails from Chihuahua to El Paso, three hundred miles in three
-nights. This bronco--he’s a deep bay, shadin’ off into black like one
-of them overripe violins, an’ with nostrils like red expandin’
-hollyhocks--can go a hundred miles between dark an’ dark, an’ do it
-three days in a week. Which lie’s shore a wonder, is that little hoss;
-an’ the saddle an’ upholstery that goes with him, Spanish leather an’
-gold, is fit for his company.
-
-As Dan leads him up in front of the Red Light Christmas Eve for us to
-look at, he says:
-
-“Gents, if he ain’t a swallow-bird on four legs, then I never sees no
-sech fowl; an’ the only drawback is that, considerin’ the season, we
-can’t hang him on no tree.”
-
-An’ y ere, now, is where we-all gets scared up. It spoils the symmetry
-of this story to chunk it in this a-way; but I can’t he’p myse’f, for
-this story, like that tale of James of the Beads, is troo.
-
-Jest as we-all is about to prounce down with our gifts on Dave’s
-wickeyup like a mink on a settin’ hen--Dan bein’ all framed an’ frazzled
-up in cow-tails an’ buffalo horns like a Injun medicine man, thinkin’ to
-make the deal as Santa Claus--Tucson Jennie comes surgin’ up, wild an’
-frantic, an’ allows little Enright Peets is lost. Dave, she says, is
-chargin’ about, tryin’ to round him up.
-
-“Which I knows he’s done been chewed up by wolves,” says Tucson Jennie,
-wringin’ her hands an’ throwin’ her apron over her head. “He’d shore
-showed up for supper if he’s alive.”
-
-It’s obvious that before that Christmas can proceed, we-all has got to
-recover the beneficiary. Thar’s a gen’ral saddlin’ up, an’ in no time
-Wolf-ville’s population is spraddlin’ about the surroundin’ scenery.
-
-It comes right though, an’ it’s Dan who makes the turn. Dan discovers
-little Enright Peets camped down in the lee of a mesquite bush, seven
-miles out on his way to the Floridas mountains. He puts it up he’s goin’
-over to the hills to have a big talk an’ make medicine with Moh-Kwa, the
-wise medicine b’ar that Sioux Sam yere has been reelatin’ to him about.
-
-No, that child ain’t scared none; he’s takin’ it cool an’ contented,
-with twenty coyotes settin’ about, blinkin’ an’ silent on their tails,
-an’ lookin’ like they’re sort o’ thinkin’ little Enright Peets over an’
-tryin’ to figger out his system. Them little wolves don’t onderstand
-what brings that infant out alone on the plains, that a-way; an’ they’re
-cogitatin’ about it when Dan disperses ’em to the four winds.
-
-That’s all thar is to the yarn. Little Enright Peets is packed into camp
-an’ planted in the midst of them books an’ blocks an’ candies which Faro
-Nell su’gests; also, he’s made happy with the little hoss. Dan, in his
-medicine mask an’ paint, does a skelp dance, an’ is the soul of the
-hour.
-
-Little Enright Peets’ joy is as wide as the territory. Despite
-reemonstrance, he insists on get-tin’ into that gold-embossed saddle an’
-givin’ his little hoss a whirl ‘round the camp. Dan rides along to head
-off stampedes.
-
-On the return, little Enright Peets comes down the street like an arrow
-an’ pulls up short. As Dave searches him out of the saddle, he says:
-
-“Paw, that cayouse could beat four kings an’ a ace.”
-
-That’s reward enough; Wolfville is never more pleased than the night
-it opens up to little Enright Peets the beauties which lies hid in
-Christmas. An’ the feelin’ that we-all has done this, sort o’ glorifies
-an’ gilds the profound deebauch that en-soos. Tucson Jennie lays it down
-that it’s shore the star Christmas, since it’s the one when her lost is
-found an’ the Fates in the guise of Dan presents her with her boy ag’in.
-I knows of myse’f, gents, that Jennie is shore moved, for she omits
-utter to lay for Dave with reproaches when, givin’ way to a gen’rous
-impulse, he issues forth with the rest of the band, an’ relaxes into a
-picnic that savors of old days.
-
-“My friends,” observed the Jolly Doctor, as we were taking our candles
-preparatory for bed, the hour having turned towards the late, “I shall
-think on this as an occasion of good company. And to-morrow evening--for
-this storm will continue to hold us prisoners--you will find unless
-better offer, I shall recognize my debt to you by attempting a Christmas
-story myself. I cannot stir your interest as has our friend of camps and
-trails with his Wolfville chapter, but I shall do what lies in me.”
-
-“You will tell us of some Christmas,” hazarded the Sour Gentleman, “that
-came beneath your notice as a professional man.”
-
-“Oh, no; not that,” returned the Jolly Doctor. “This is rather a story
-of health and robust strength than any sick-bed tale. It is of gloves
-and fighting men who never saw a doctor. I shall call it ‘The Pitt
-Street Stringency.’”
-
-It was eight of the clock on the second evening when we gathered about
-the fire-place. The snow was still falling and roads were reported
-blocked beyond any thought of passage. We were snowbound; folk who
-should know declared that if a road were broken for our getting out
-within a week, it was the best we might look for.
-
-No one seemed stricken of grief at this prison prospect. As we came
-about the cheery blaze, every face was easy and content. The Jolly
-Doctor joined the Red Nosed Gentleman in his burgundy, while the Sour
-Gentleman and the Old Cattleman qualified for the occasion with
-a copious account of whiskey, which the aged man of cows called
-“Nose-paint.” Sioux Sam and I were the only “abstainers”--I had ceased
-and he had never commenced--but as if to make up, we smoked a double
-number of cigars.
-
-The Jolly Doctor began with the explanation that the incidents he would
-relate had fallen beneath his notice when as a student he walked the
-New York hospitals; then, glass in hand, he told us the tale of The Pitt
-Street Stringency.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER VII.--THE PITT STREET STRINGENCY.
-
-Another would-be sooicide, eh! Here, Kid,” to a sharp gamin who does
-errands and odd commissions for the house; “take this mut in where dey
-kills ’em.”
-
-The speaker is a loud young man, clad in garments of violence. The derby
-tilted over eye, the black cigar jutting ceilingward at an agle of sixty
-degrees, the figured shirt whereof a dominating dye is angry red, the
-high collar and flash tie, with its cheap stone, all declare the Bowery.
-As if to prove the proposition announced of his costume, the young man
-is perched on a stool, the official ticket-seller of a Bowery theatre.
-
-Mike Menares, whom the Bowery person alludes to as the “mut,” is a
-square-shouldered boy of eighteen; handsome he is as Apollo, yet with a
-slow, good-humored guilelessness of face. He has come on business
-bent. That mighty pugilist, the Dublin Terror, is nightly on the stage,
-offering two hundred dollars to any amateur among boxers who shall
-remain before him four Queensberry rounds. Mike Menares, he of
-the candidly innocent countenance, desires to proffer himself as a
-sacrifice.
-
-“Youse is just in time, sport,” remarks the brisk gamin to whom Mike has
-been committed, as he pilots the guileless one to the stage door. “It’s
-nine o’clock now, an’ d’ Terror goes on to do his bag-t’umpin’ turn at
-ten. After that comes d’ knockin’ out, see! But say! if youse was tired
-of livin’, why didn’t you jump in d’ East river? I’d try d’ river an’d’
-morgue before I’d come here to be murdered be d’ Terror.”
-
-Mike makes no retort to this, lacking lightness of temper. His gamin
-conductor throws open the stage door and signals Mike to enter.
-
-“Tell d’ butcher here’s another calf for him,” vouchsafes the gamin to
-the stage-hands inside the door.
-
-Let us go back four hours to a three-room tenement in Pitt Street. There
-are two rooms and a little kennel of a kitchen. The furnishings are
-rough and cheap and clean. The lady of the tenement, as the floors
-declare, is a miracle of soap and water. And the lady is little Mollie
-Lacy, aged eleven years.
-
-The family of the Pitt Street tenement is made up of three. There is
-Mike Menares, our hero; little Mollie; and, lastly, her brother Davy,
-aged nine. Little Davy is lame. He fell on the tenement stairs four
-years before and injured his hip. The hospital doctors took up the work
-where the tenement stairs left off, and Davy came from his sick-bed
-doomed to a crutch for life.
-
-Mike Menares is half-brother of the younger ones. Nineteen years before,
-Mike’s mother, Irish, with straw-colored hair and blue eyes, wedded one
-Menares, a Spanish Jew. This fortunate Menares was a well-looking, tall
-man; with hair black and stiffening in a natural pompadour. He kept a
-tobacco stall underneath a stair in Park Row, and was accounted rich by
-the awfully poor about him. He died, however, within the year following
-Mike’s birth; and thus there was an end to the rather thoroughbred dark
-Spanish Jew.
-
-Mike’s mother essayed matrimony a second time. She selected as a partner
-in this experiment a shiftless, idle, easy creature named David Lacy,
-who would have been a plasterer had not his indolence defeated his
-craft. Little Mollie, and Davy of the clattering crutch, occurred as a
-kind of penalty of the nuptials.
-
-Three years and a half before we encounter this mixed household, Lacy,
-the worthless, sailed away on a China ship without notice or farewell.
-Some say he was “shanghaied,” and some that he went of free will. Mrs.
-Lacy adopted the former of the two theories.
-
-“David Lacy, too idle to work ashore, assuredly would not go to sea
-where work and fare are tenfold harder.”
-
-Thus argued Mrs. Lacy. Still, a solution of Lacy’s reasons for becoming
-a mariner late in life is not here important. He sailed and he never
-returned; and as Mrs. Lacy perished of pneumonia the following winter,
-they both may be permitted to quit this chronicle to be meddled with by
-us no further.
-
-Mike Menares had witnessed fifteen years when his mother died. As
-suggested, he is a singularly handsome boy, and of an appearance likely
-to impress. From his Conemara mother, he received a yellow head of hair.
-Underneath are a pair of jet black brows, a hawkish nose, double rows
-of strong white teeth, and deep soft black eyes, as honest as a hound’s,
-the plain bestowal of his Jewish father.
-
-Mike was driving a delivery wagon for the great grocers, Mark & Milford,
-when his mother died. This brought six dollars a week. After the sad
-going of his mother, Mike found a second situation where he might work
-evenings, and thereby add six further dollars to that stipend from Mark
-& Milford. This until the other day continued. On twelve dollars a week,
-and with little Mollie--a notable housekeeper--to manage for the Pitt
-Street tenement, the composite house of Menares and Lacy fared well.
-
-Mike’s evening labors require a description. One Sarsfield O’Punch, an
-expert of boxing and an athlete of some eminence, maintains a private
-gymnasium on Fifty-ninth street. This personage is known to his patrons
-as “Professor O’Punch.” Mike, well-builded and lithe, broad of shoulder,
-deep of lung, lean of flank, a sort of half-grown Hercules, finds
-congenial employ as aid to Professor O’Punch. Mike’s primal duty is to
-box with those amateurs of the game who seek fistic enlightenment of
-his patron, and who have been carried by that scientist into regions of
-half-wisdom concerning the bruising art for which they moil. From eight
-o’clock until eleven, Mike’s destiny sets him, one after the other,
-before a full score of these would-be boxers, some small and some big,
-some good and some bad, some weak and some strong, but all zealous to a
-perspiring degree. These novices smite and spare not, and move with
-all their skill and strength to pummel Mike. They have, be it said, but
-indifferent success; for Mike, waxing expert among experts, side-steps
-and blocks and stops and ducks and gets away; and his performances in
-these defensive directions are the whisper of the school.
-
-Now and then he softly puts a glove on some eager face, or over some
-unguarded heart, or feather-like left-hooks some careless jaw, to the
-end that the other understand a peril and fend against it. But Mike,
-working lightly as a kitten, hurts no one; such being the private
-commands of Professor O’Punch who knows that to pound a pupil is to lose
-a pupil.
-
-It is to be doubted if the easy-natured Mike is aware of his wonderful
-strength of arm and body, or the cat-like quickness and certainty of
-his blows. During these three years wherein he has been underling to
-Professor O’Punch, Mike strikes but two hard blows. One evening several
-of the followers of Professor O’Punch are determining their prowess on
-a machine intended to register the force of a blow. Following each other
-in a fashion of punching procession, these aspiring gymnasts, putting
-their utmost into the swings, strike with all steam. Four hundred to
-five hundred pounds says the register; this is vaunted as a vastly good
-account.
-
-Mike, with folded arms and stripped to ring costume--his official
-robes--is looking on, a smile lighting his pleasant face. Mike is ever
-interested and ever silent.
-
-As the others smite, Mike beams with approval, but makes no comment. At
-last one observes:
-
-“Menares, how many pounds can you strike?”
-
-“I don’t know,” replies Mike, in a surprised way, “I never tried.”
-
-“Try now,” says the other; “I’ve a notion you could hit hard enough if
-you cared to.”
-
-The others second the speaker. Much and instant curiosity grows up as
-to what Mike can do with his hands if he puts his soul into it. There
-is not an amateur about but knows more of Mike than does the latter of
-himself. They know him as one perfect of defensive boxing; also, they
-recall the precise feather-like taps which Mike confers on the best of
-their muster whenever he chooses; but none has a least of knowledge of
-how bitterly hard Mike’s glove might be sent home should ever his heart
-be given to the trial.
-
-Being urged, Mike begins to rouse; he himself grows curious. It has
-never come to him as a thought to make the experiment. The “punching
-machine” has stood there as part of the paraphernalia of the gymnasium.
-But to the fog-witted Mike, who comes to work for so many dollars a week
-and who has not once considered himself in the light of a boxer, whether
-excellent or the reverse, it held no particular attraction. It could
-tell him no secrets he cares a stiver to hear.
-
-Now, Mike for a first time feels moved to a bit of self-enlightenment.
-Poising himself for the effort, Mike, with the quickness of light, sends
-in a right-hand smash that all but topples the contrivance from its
-base. For the moment the muscles of his back and leg knot and leap
-in ropelike ridges; and then they as instantly sink away. The machine
-registers eight hundred and ninety-one pounds.
-
-The on-gazers draw a long breath. Then they turn their eyes on Mike,
-whose regular outlines, with muscles retreated again into curves and
-slopes and shimmering ripples, have no taint of the bruiser, and
-whose handsome features, innocent of a faintest ferocity, recall some
-beautiful statue rather than anything more viciously hard.
-
-Mike’s second earnest blow comes off in this sort. He is homeward bound
-from gymnasium work one frosty midnight. Not a block from his home,
-three evil folk of the night are standing beneath an electric light.
-Mike, unsuspicious, passes them. Instantly, one delivers a cut at Mike’s
-head with a sandbag. Mike, warned by the shadow of uplifted arm, springs
-forward out of reach, wheels, and then as the footpad blunders towards
-him, Mike’s left hand, clenched and hammerlike, goes straight to his
-face. Bone and teeth are broken with the shock of it; blood spurts, and
-the footpad comes senseless to the pave. His ally, one of the other two,
-grasps at Mike’s throat. His clutch slips on the stern muscles of the
-athlete’s neck as if the neck were a column of brass. Mike seizes his
-assailant’s arm with his right hand; there is a twist and a shriek;
-the second robber rolls about with a dislocated fore-arm. The third,
-unharmed, flies screeching with the fear of death upon him.
-
-At full speed comes a policeman, warned of his duty by the howls of
-anguish. He surveys the two on the ground; one still and quiet, the
-other groaning and cursing with his twisted arm. The officer sends in an
-ambulance call. Then he surveys with pleased intentness the regular face
-of Mike, cool and unperturbed.
-
-“An Irish Sheeny!” softly comments the officer to himself.
-
-He is expert of faces, is the officer, and deduces Mike’s two-ply origin
-from his yellow hair, dark eye and curved nose.
-
-“You’re part Irish and part Jew,” observes the policeman.
-
-“My mother was from Ireland,” answers Mike; “my father was a Spanish Jew
-from Salamanca. I think that’s what they call it, although I was not old
-enough when he died to remember much about him.”
-
-“Irish crossed on Jew!” comments the officer, still in a mood of
-thoughtful admiration. “It’s the best prize-ring strain in the world!”
- The officer is in his dim way a patron of sport.
-
-Mike thanks the other; for, while by no means clearly understanding, he
-feels that a compliment is meant. Then Mike goes homeward to Mollie and
-little Davy.
-
-It is the twenty-third of December--two days before Christmas--when we
-are first made friends of Mike Menares. About a month before, the little
-family of three fell upon bad days. Mike was dismissed by the great
-grocers, and the six dollars weekly from that quarter came to an end.
-Mike’s delivery wagon was run down and crushed by a car; and, while Mike
-was not to blame, the grocers have no time to discover a justice, and
-Mike was told to go.
-
-For mere food and light and fire, Mike’s other six Saturday dollars from
-Professor O’Punch would with economy provide. But there is the rent on
-New Year’s day! Also, and more near, is Christmas, with not a penny to
-spare. It must perforce be a bare festival, this Christmas. It will be a
-blow to little Davy of the crutch, who has talked only of Christmas for
-two months past and gone.
-
-Mike, as has been intimated, is dull and slow of brain. He has just
-enough of education to be able to read and write. He owns no bad
-habits--no habits at all, in fact; and the one great passion of his
-simple heart is love without a limit for Mollie and little Davy. He
-lives for them; the least of their desires is the great concern of
-Mike’s life. Therefore, when his income shrinks from twelve dollars to
-six, it creeps up on him and chills him as a loss to Mollie and Davy.
-And peculiarly does this sorrowful business of a ruined Christmas for
-Davy prey on poor Mike.
-
-“You and I won’t mind,” says housewife Mollie, looking up in Mike’s face
-with the sage dignity of her eleven years, “because we’re old enough to
-understand; but I feel bad about little Davy. It’s the first real awful
-Christmas we’ve ever had.”
-
-Mollie is as bright and wise as Mike is dull. Seven years her senior,
-still Mike has grown to believe in and rely altogether on Mollie as a
-guide. He takes her commands without question, and does her will like
-a slave. To Mollie goes every one of Mike’s dollars; it is Mollie who
-disposes of them, while Mike never gives them a thought. They have been
-devoted to the one purpose of Mike’s labors; they have gone to Mollie
-and little Davy of the crutch; why, then, should Mike pursue them
-further?
-
-Following housewife Mollie’s regrets over a sad Christmas that was not
-because of their poverty to be a Christmas, Mike sits solemnly by the
-window looking out on the gathering gloom and hurrying holiday crowds of
-Pitt Street. The folk are all poor; yet each seems able to do a bit for
-Christmas. As they hurry by, with small bundles and parcels, and now
-and then a basket from which protrude mayhap a turkey’s legs or other
-symptom of the victory of Christmas, Mike, in the midst of his sluggish
-amiabilities, discovers a sense of pain--a darkish thought of trouble.
-
-And as if grief were to sharpen his wits, Mike has for almost a first
-and last time an original idea. It is the thought natural enough, when
-one reflects on Mike’s engagements, evening in and evening out, with
-Professor O’Punch.
-
-[Illustration: 0115]
-
-That day Mike, in passing through the Bowery, read the two hundred
-dollars offer of the selfconfident Terror. At that time Mike felt
-nothing save wonder that so great a fortune might be the reward of so
-small an effort. But it did not occur to him that he should try a tilt
-with the Terror. In his present stress, however, and with the woe upon
-him of a bad Christmas to dawn for little Davy, the notion marches
-slowly into Mike’s intelligence. And it seems simple enough, too, now
-Mike has thought of it; and with nothing further of pro or con, he
-prepares himself for the enterprise.
-
-For causes not clear to himself he says nothing to housewife Mollie of
-his plans. But he alarms that little lady of the establishment’s few
-sparse pots and kettles by declining to eat his supper. Mollie fears
-Mike is ill. The latter, knowing by experience just as any animal might,
-that with twelve minutes of violent exercise before him, he is better
-without, while denying the imputation of illness, sticks to his
-supperless resolve.
-
-Then Mike goes into the rear room and dons blue tights, blue sleeveless
-shirt, canvas trunks, and light shoes; his working costume. Over
-these he draws trousers and a blue sweater; on top of all a heavy
-double-breasted jacket. Thrusting his feet, light shoes and all, into
-heavy snow-proof overshoes, and pulling on a bicycle cap, Mike is
-arrayed for the street. Mollie knows of these several preparations, the
-ring costume under the street clothes, but thinks naught of it, such
-being Mike’s nightly custom as he departs for the academy of Professor
-O’Punch. At the last moment, Mike kisses both Mollie and little Davy;
-and then, with a sudden original enthusiasm, he says:
-
-“I’ve been thinkin’, Mollie; mebby I can get some money. Mebby we’ll see
-a good Christmas, after all.”
-
-Mollie is dazed by the notion of Mike thinking; but she looks in
-his face, with its honest eyes full of love for her and Davy, and as
-beautiful as a god’s and as unsophisticated, and in spite of herself a
-hope begins to live and lift up its head. Possibly Mike may get money;
-and Christmas, and the rent, and many another matter then pinching the
-baby housekeeper and of which she has made no mention to Mike, will be
-met and considered.
-
-“It’ll be nice if you should get money, Mike,” is all Mollie trusts
-herself to say, as she returns Mike’s good-bye kiss.
-
-When Mike gets into Pitt Street he moves slowly. There’s the crowd, for
-one thing. Then, too, it’s over early for his contest with the Terror.
-Mike prefers to arrive at the theatre just in time to strip and make
-the required application for those two hundred dollars. It may appear
-strange, but it never once occurs to Mike that he will not last the
-demanded four rounds. But it seems such a weighty sum! Mike doubts if
-the offer be earnest; hesitates with the fear that the management will
-refuse to give him the money at the end.
-
-“But surely,” decides Mike, “they will feel as though they ought to give
-me something. I lose a dollar by not going to Professor O’Punch’s; they
-must take account of that.”
-
-Mike loiters along with much inborn ease of heart. Occasionally he
-pauses to gaze into one of the cheap shop windows, ablaze and garish of
-the season’s wares. There is no wind; the air has no point; but it is
-snowing softly, persistently, flakes of a mighty size and softness.
-
-Ten minutes before he arrives at that theatre which has been the scene
-of the Terror’s triumphs, Mike enters a bakery whereof the proprietor, a
-German, is known to him. Mike has no money but he feels no confusion for
-that.
-
-“John,” says Mike to the German; “I’ve got to spar a little to-night and
-I want a big plate of soup.”
-
-“Sure!” says John, leading the way to a rear room which thrives greasily
-as a kind of restaurant. “And here, Mike,” goes on John, as the soup
-arrives, “I’ll put a big drink of sherry in it. You will feel good
-because of it, and the sherry and the hot soup will make you quick and
-strong already.”
-
-At the finish, Mike, with an eye of bland innocence--for he is certain
-the theatre will give him something, even if it withhold the full two
-hundred--tells John he will pay for the soup within the hour, when he
-returns.
-
-“That’s all right, Mike,” cries the good-natured baker, “any time will
-do.”
-
-“This w’y, me cove,” observes a person with a cockney accent, as the
-sharp gamin delivers Mike, together with the message to the Terror, at
-the stage door; “this w’y; ’ere’s a dressin’ room for you to shift
-your togs.”
-
-Later, when Mike’s outer husks are off and he stands arrayed for the
-ring, this person, who is old and gray and wears a scarred and battered
-visage, looks Mike over in approval:
-
-“You seems an amazin’ bit of stuff, lad,” says this worthy man; “the
-build of Tom Sayres at his best, but’eavier. I ’opes you’ll do this
-Mick, but I’m afeared on it. You looks too pretty; an’ you ain’t got a
-fightin’ face. How ’eavy be you, lad?”
-
-“One hundred and eighty-one,” replies Mike, smiling on the Englishman
-with his boy’s eyes.
-
-“Can you spar a bit?” asks the other.
-
-“Why, of course I can!” and Mike’s tones exhibit surprise.
-
-“Well, laddy,” says the other; “don’t let this Dublin bloke rattle you.
-’E’s a great blow’ard, I takes it, an’ will quit if he runs ag’in two
-or three stiff ’uns. A score of years ago, I’d a-give ’im a stone
-an’ done for ’im myself. I’m to be in your corner, laddy, an’ I trusts
-you’ll not disgrace me.”
-
-“Who are you?” asks Mike.
-
-“Oh, me?” says the other; “I works for the theayter, laddy, an’, bein’
-as ’ow I’m used to fightin’, I goes on to ’eel an’ ’andle the
-amatoors as goes arter the Terror. It’s all square, laddy; I’ll be
-be’ind you; an’ I’ll ’elp you to win those pennies if I sees a w’y.”
-
-“I have also the honor,” shouts the loud master of ceremonies, “to
-introduce to you Mike Men-ares, who will contend with the Dublin
-Terror. Should he stay four rounds, Marquis of Queens-berry rules, the
-management forfeits two hundred dollars to the said Menares.”
-
-“What a model for my Jason,” says a thin shaving of a man who stands
-as a spectator in the wings. He is an artist of note, and speaks to a
-friend at his elbow. “What a model for my Jason! I will give him five
-dollars an hour for three hours a day. What’s his name? Mike what?” The
-battle is about to commence; the friend, tongue-tied of interest, makes
-no reply.
-
-The Dublin Terror is a rugged, powerful ruffian, with lumpy shoulders,
-thick short neck, and a shock gorilla head. His little gray eyes are
-lighted fiercely. His expression is as savagely bitter as Mike’s is
-gentle. The creature, a fighter by nature, was born meaning harm to
-other men.
-
-There is a roped square, about eighteen feet each way, on the stage, in
-which the gladiators will box. The floor is canvas made safe with rosin.
-The master of cermonies, himself a pugilist of celebration, will act as
-referee. The old battered man of White Chapel is in Mike’s corner.
-
-Another gentleman, with face similarly marred, but with Seven Dials as
-his nesting place, is posted opposite to befriend the Terror. There
-is much buzz in the audience--a rude gathering, it is--and a deal of
-sympathetic admiration and not a ray of hope for Mike in the eyes of
-those present.
-
-The Terror is replete of a riotous confidence and savage to begin. For
-two nights, such is the awe of him engendered among local bruisers, no
-one has presented himself for a meeting. This has made the Terror hungry
-for a battle; he feels like a bear unfed. As he stands over from Mike
-awaiting the call of “Time,” he looks formidable and forbidding, with
-his knotted arms and mighty hands.
-
-Mike lounges in his place, the perfection of the athlete and picture of
-grace with power. His face, full of vacant amiability, shows pleased
-and interested as he looks out on the crowded, rampant house. Mike has
-rather the air of a spectator than a principal. The crowd does not shake
-him; he is not disturbed by the situation. In a fashion, he has been
-through the same thing every night, save Sunday, for three years. It
-comes commonplace enough to Mike.
-
-In a blurred way Mike resents the blood-eagerness which glows in the
-eyes of his enemy; but he knows no fear. It serves to remind him,
-however, that no restraints are laid upon him in favor of the brute
-across the ring, and that he is at liberty to hit with what lust he
-will.
-
-“Time!” suddenly calls the referee.
-
-Those who entertained a forbode of trouble ahead for Mike are agreeably
-surprised. With the word “Time!” Mike springs into tremendous life like
-a panther aroused. His dark eyes glow and gleam in a manner to daunt.
-
-The Terror, a gallant headlong ruffian, throws himself upon Mike like a
-tornado. For full two minutes his blows fall like a storm. It does not
-seem of things possible that man could last through such a tempest.
-But Mike lasts; more than that, every blow of the Terror is stopped or
-avoided.
-
-It runs off like a miracle to the onlookers, most of whom know somewhat
-of self-defensive arts. That Mike makes no reprisals, essays no
-counterhits, does not surprise. A cautious wisdom would teach him to
-feel out and learn his man. Moreover, Mike is not there to attack; his
-mere mission is to stay four rounds.
-
-While spectators, with approving comment on Mike’s skill and quickness,
-are reminding one another that Mike’s business is “simply to stay,” Mike
-himself is coming to a different thought. He has grown disgusted rather
-than enraged by the attacks of the Terror. His thrice-trained eye notes
-each detail of what moves as a whirlwind to folk looking on; his arm and
-foot provide automatically for his defense and without direct effort
-of the brain. This leaves Mike’s mind, dull as it is, with nothing to
-engage itself about save a contemplation of the Terror. In sluggish sort
-Mike begins to hold a vast dislike for that furious person.
-
-As this dislike commences to fire incipiently, he recalls the picture
-of Mollie and little Davy of the crutch. Mike remembers that it is
-after ten o’clock, and his two treasures must be deep in sleep. Then
-he considers of Christmas, now but a day away; and of the money so
-necessary to the full pleasure of his sleeping Mollie and little Davy.
-
-As those home-visions come to Mike, and his antipathy to the Terror
-mounting to its height, the grim impulse claims him to attack. Tigerlike
-he steps back to get his distance; then he springs forward. It is too
-quickly done for eye to follow. The Terror’s guard is opened by a feint;
-and next like a flash Mike’s left shoots cleanly in. There is a sharp
-“spank!” as the six-ounce glove finds the Terror’s jaw; that person goes
-down like an oak that is felled. As he falls, Mike’s right starts with
-a crash for the heart. But there is no need: Mike stops the full blow
-midway--a feat without a mate in boxing. The Terror lies as one without
-life.
-
-“W’y didn’t you let ’im ’ave your right like you started, laddy?”
- screams the old Cockney, as Mike walks towards his corner.
-
-Mike laughs in his way of gentle, soft goodnature, and points where the
-Terror, white and senseless, bleeds thinly at nose and ear.
-
-“The left did it,” Mike replies.
-
-Out of his eyes the hot light is already dying. He takes a deep, deep
-breath, that arches his great breast and makes the muscles clutch and
-climb like serpents; he stretches himself by extending his arms and
-standing high on his toes. Meanwhile he beams pleasantly on his grizzled
-adherent.
-
-“It wasn’t much,” says Mike.
-
-“You be the coolest cove, laddy!” retorts the other in a rapt whisper.
-Then he towels deftly at the sweat on Mike’s forehead.
-
-The decision has been given in Mike’s favor. And to his delight, without
-argument or hesitation, the loud young man of the vociferous garb comes
-behind the scenes and endows him with two hundred dollars.
-
-“Say,” observes the loud young man, admiringly, “you ain’t no wonder, I
-don’t t’ink!”
-
-“But how did you come to do it, Mike?” asks the good-natured baker, as
-Mike lingers over a midnight porterhouse at the latter’s restaurant.
-
-“I had to, John,” says Mike, turning his innocent face on the other; “I
-had to win Christmas money for Mollie and little Davy.”
-
-“And what,” said the Sour Gentleman, “became of this Mike Menares?”
-
-“I should suppose,” broke in the Red Nosed Gentleman, who had followed
-the Jolly Doctor’s narrative with relish, “I should suppose now he posed
-for the little sculptor’s Jason.”
-
-“It is my belief he did,” observed the Jolly Doctor, with a twinkle,
-“and in the end he became full partner of the bruiser, O’Punch, and
-shared the profits of the gymnasium instead of taking a dollar a night
-for his labors. His sister grew up and married, which, when one reflects
-on the experience of her mother, shows she owned no little of her
-brother’s courage.”
-
-“Your story,” remarked the Red Nosed Gentleman to the Jolly Doctor, “and
-the terrific blow which this Menares dealt the Dublin Terror brings to
-mv mind a blow my father once struck.” This was a cue to the others and
-one quickly seized on; the Red Nosed Gentleman was urged to give the
-story of that paternal blow. First seeing to it that the stock of
-burgundy at his elbow was ample, and freighting his own and the Jolly
-Doctor’s glasses to the brim, the Red Nosed Gentleman coughed, cleared
-his throat, and then gave us the tale of That Stolen Ace of Hearts.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER VIII.--THAT STOLEN ACE OF HEARTS.
-
-When I, at the unripe age of seventeen, left my father’s poor
-cottage-house on Tom’s Run and threw myself into life’s struggle, I
-sought Pittsburg as a nearest promising arena of effort. I had a
-small place at a smaller wage as a sort of office boy and porter for
-a down-town establishment devoted to a commerce of iron; but as I came
-early to cut my connection with that hard emporium we will not dwell
-thereon.
-
-I have already told you how by nature I was a gambler. I had inborn
-hankerings after games of chance, and it was scant time, indeed, before
-I found myself on terms of more or less near acquaintance with every
-card sharper of the city. And I became under their improper tutelage
-an expert cheat myself. At short cards and such devices as faro
-and roulette, I soon knew each devious turn and was in excellent
-qualification to pillage my way to eminence if not to riches among the
-nimble-fingered nobility of the green tables into whose midst I had
-coaxed or crowded my way. Vast was my ambition to soar as a blackleg,
-and no student at his honest books burned with more fire to succeed.
-I became initiate into such mysteries as the “bug,” the “punch,” the
-“hold-out”; I could deal “double” or “from the bottom;” was a past
-master of those dubious faro inventions, the “snake,” the “end squeeze,”
- and the “balance top;” could “put back” with a clean deftness that might
-deceive even my masters in evil doing, and with an eye like a hawk read
-a deck of marked cards with the same easy certainty that I read the
-alphabet. It was a common compliment to my guilty merit that no better
-craftsman at crooked play ever walked in Diamond Alley.
-
-No, as I’ve heretofore explained, there dawned a day when I gave up card
-gambling and played no more. It is now twenty years since I wagered so
-much as a two-bit piece in any game other than the Wall Street game of
-stocks. And yet it was no moral arousal that drew me from roulette,
-from farobank and from draw poker. I merely awoke to the truth that the
-greatest simpleton of cards is the professional gambler himself; and
-with that I turned my back on the whole scurvy business and quit the
-dens for the exchange. And with no purpose to preach, I say openly and
-with a fullest freedom that the game of stock speculation is as replete
-of traps and pitfalls, and of as false and blackleg character as any
-worst game of iniquitous faro that is dealt with trimmed and sanded deck
-from a dishonest box. As an arena of morals the stock exchange presents
-no conscious improvement beyond what is offered by the veriest dead-fall
-ever made elate with those two rings at the bell which tell the waiting
-inmates that some “steerer” is on the threshold with rustic victim to
-be fleeced. I once read that the homestead of Captain Kidd, the pirate,
-stood two centuries ago on that plot of ground now covered by the New
-York Stock Exchange; and I confess to a smile when I reflected how
-the spirit of immortal rapine would seem to hover over the place. The
-exchange is a fit successor to the habitat of that wild freebooter
-who died and dried in execution dock when long ago the Stuart Anne was
-queen.
-
-During those earlier months in Pittsburg, I was not permitted by my
-father--who had much control of me, even unto the day of his death--to
-altogether abandon Tom’s Run, and the good, grimy miner folk, its
-inhabitants. My week’s holiday began with each Saturday’s noon; from
-that hour until Monday morning I was free; and thus, obeying my father’s
-behests, Saturday evening and Sunday, I was bound to pass beneath my
-parents’ roof.
-
-It was during one of these visits home when I first cheated at
-cards--memorable event!--and it was on another that my roguery was
-discovered and my father struck that blow.
-
-As already stated, my father was of Welsh extraction. It was no less
-the fact, however, that his original stock was Irish; his grandfather--I
-believe it to have been that venerable and I trust respected
-gentleman--coming to Wales from somewhere on the banks of the
-Blackwater. And my father, excellent man! had vast pride in his Irish
-lineage and grew never so angry, particularly if a bit heated of his
-Saturday evening cups, as when one spoke of him as offshoot of the rocky
-land of leeks and saintly David.
-
-“What!” he would cry; “because I was born in Wales, do you take me for
-an onion-eating Welshman? Man, I’m Irish and don’t make that mistake
-again!”
-
-The vigor wherewith his mine-hardened fist smote the table as conclusion
-to this, carried such weight of emphasis that no man was ever found to
-fall a second time into the error.
-
-For myself, the question whether my ancestors were Welsh or Irish held
-little interest. I was looking forward not backward, and a hot avarice
-to hunt dollars drove from my bosom the last trace of concern touching a
-genealogy. I would sooner have one year’s run of uninterrupted luck at
-a gambling table than to know myself a direct descendant of the
-Plantagenets. Not so my dear old father; to the hour when death closed
-his eyes--already sightless for ten years--burned out with a blast,
-they were--he ceased not to regale me with tales of that noble line of
-dauntless Irish from whom we drew our blood. For the ten years following
-the destruction of his eyes by powder, I saw much of my father, for I
-established him at a little country tavern near enough to the ocean to
-hear the surf and smell the salt breath of it, and two or three times a
-week I made shift to get down where he was. And whether my stay was for
-an hour or for a night--as on Sunday this latter came often to be the
-chance--he made his pedigree, or what he dreamed was such, the proud
-burden of his conversation.
-
-Brian Boru, I remember, was an original wellhead of our family. My
-father was tireless in his settings forth of this hero king of Munster;
-nor did he fail at the close of his story to curse the assassin who
-struck down Boru at Clontarf. Sometimes to tease him, I’d argue what
-must have been the weak and primitive inconsequence of the royal Boru.
-I’d suggest that by the sheer narrowness and savagery of the hour
-wherein that monarch lived, he could have been nothing more royal than
-the mere king of a kale patch, and probably wore less of authority
-with still less of revenue and reverence than belong commonly with any
-district leader of Tammany Hall.
-
-At these base doubtings my parent’s wrath would mount. He would wax
-vivid with a picture of the majesty and grandeur of the great Boru; and
-of the halls wherein he fed and housed a thousand knights compared with
-whom in riches, magnificence, and chivalrous feats those warriors who
-came about King Arthur’s round table showed paltry, mean and low. To
-crown narration he would ascribe to Boru credit as a world’s first law
-giver and hail him author of the “Code Brian.”
-
-“Shure!” he would say; “he called his scholars and his penmen about him
-and he made them write down as the wor-rds fell from th’ mouth av him
-th’ whole of th’ Code Brian; an’ this in tur-rn was a model of th’ Code
-Napoleon that makes th’ law av Fr-rance to-day.”
-
-It was in vain I pointed out that Napoleon’s Code found its roots and
-as well, its models, in the Corpus Juris Civilis of Justinian--I had
-learned so much Latin from Father Glennon--and that nowhere in the
-English law was the Code Brian, as he called it, so much as adverted to.
-
-“An’ that’s th’ Sassenach jealousy av thim!” he would say. “An’ who was
-this Justinian? Who, indade, but a thievin’ Roman imp’ror who shtole his
-laws from King Boru just as th’ Dagoes now are shtealin’ th’ jobs at th’
-mines from th’ Irish an’ Welsh lads to whom they belong av r-rights.”
-
-After this I said no more; I did not explain that Justinian and his
-Pandects and the others of his grand body of civil law were in existence
-five centuries before the martyred Boru was born. That discovery would
-have served no purpose beyond my parent’s exasperation and earned for
-myself as well as the world’s historians naught save a cataract of hard
-words.
-
-You marvel, perhaps, why I dwell with such length on the memory of my
-father--a poor, blind, ignorant miner of coal! I loved the old man; and
-to this day when my hair, too, is gray and when I may win my wealth and
-count my wealth and keep my wealth with any of the land, I recall him
-as the only man for whom I ever felt either love or confidence or real
-respect.
-
-Yes; I heard much of the blood of the truculent yet wise Boru; also of
-younger ancestors who fought for the Stuarts against Cromwell, against
-Monmouth, against William; and later in both the “Fifteen” and in
-the “Forty-five.” Peculiarly was I made to know of my mother’s close
-connection by blood with the house of that brave Sarsfield “who,” as my
-father explained, “fairly withstud th’ Dootchman at th’ Boyne; an’ later
-made him quit befure th’ walls av Limerick.” There was one tradition of
-the renowned Sarsfield which the old gentleman was peculiarly prone to
-relate, and on the head of him who distrusted the legend there was sure
-to fall a storm. That particular tale concerned the Irish soldier and
-the sword of Wallace wight.
-
-“Thish William Wallace,” my father was wont to say as he approached the
-myth, “was a joint (giant), no less. He was nine fut ’leven inches
-tall an’ his soord was eight fut foore inches long. It’s in Stirlin’
-Cashtle now, an’ there niver was but one man besides Wallace who cud
-handle it. Th’ Black Douglas an’ all av thim Scotchmen thried it an’
-failed. Whin, one day, along comes Gin’ral Patrick Sarsfield--a little
-bit av a felly, only five fut siven inches tall--an’ he tuk that soord
-av William Wallace in one hand an’, me son, he made it whishtle.”
-
-But I must press to my first crime of cards or your patience will
-desert. During those summer months on Tom’s Run when the mines were open
-and my father and his mates of the pick and blast were earning their
-narrow pay, it was the habit of himself and four or five other gentlemen
-of coal to gather in the Toni’s Run Arms when Saturday evening came on,
-and relax into that amusement dear to Ireland as “forty-five.” Usually
-they played for a dime a corner; on occasional rich evenings the stakes
-mounted dizzily to two-bits, though this last was not often.
-
-Now I was preyed on by a desire to make one at this Saturday contention,
-but my father would never consent.
-
-“Jack,” he’d say; “you’d only lose your money. Shure! you’re nawthin’
-but a boy an’ not fit to pla-ay cards with th’ loikes av grown-up
-men.”
-
-But I persisted; I argued--to myself, you may be certain--while I might
-be no match for these old professors of forty-five who played the game
-with never a mistake, if I, like them, played honestly, that the cunning
-work I meditated could not fail to bring me in the wealth.
-
-At last one of the others came to my rescue.
-
-“Let him pla-ay, Mishter Roche,” he said. “Let’s win his money fr-rom
-him an’ it’ll be a lesson. He’ll not lose much befure he’ll be gla-ad to
-quit.”
-
-“All right, thin,” replied my father; “you can pla-ay, Jack, till you
-lose fifty cints; an’ that’ll do ye. Moind now! whin you lose fifty
-cints you shtop.” And so I was made one of the circle.
-
-As I foresaw, I did not lose the four-bits which my indulgent parent had
-marked as the limits of farthest sacrifice to my ambitious innocence.
-Already I had brought back to Tom’s Run a curious trick or two from
-Pittsburg. It soon came to be my “deal,” and the moment I got the cards
-in my hands I abstracted the ace of hearts--a most doughty creature in
-this game of forty-five!--and dropped it in my lap, covering the fact
-from vulgar eyes with a fold of my handkerchief. That was all the
-chicane I practiced; I kept myself in constant possession of the ace of
-hearts and played it at a crisis; and at once the wagered dimes of the
-others began to travel into my illicit pockets where they made a merry
-jingle, I warrant you!
-
-The honest Irish from whom I was filching these small tributes never
-once bethought that I might play them sharp; they attributed my gains to
-luck and loud was exclamation over my good fortune. Time and again, for
-I was not their equal as a mere player, I’d board the wrong card. When
-I’d make such a mistake, one of them would cry: “D’ye moind that now!
-D’ye moind how ba-ad he plays!”
-
-“An’ yet,” another would add, “an’ yet he rakes th’ money!”
-
-Altogether I regarded my entrance into this ten-cent game of forty-five
-a most felicitous affair. I won at every sitting; getting up on some
-occasions with as much as eight dollars of profit for my evening’s work.
-In those days I went willingly to Tom’s Run, quitting Pittsburg without
-a sigh; and such was my ardor to fleece these coaldigging comrades of
-my father--and for that matter, my father, also; for like your true
-gambler, I played no favorites and was as warm to gather in the dimes of
-my parent as any--that I was usually found waiting about the forty-five
-table when, following supper, they appeared. And it all went favorably
-with me for perhaps a dozen sittings; my aggregate gains must have
-reached the mighty sum of sixty dollars. Of a merry verity! silver was
-at high tide in my hands!
-
-One evening as the half dozen devoted to the science of forty-five
-drew up to the table--myself a stripling boy, the others bearded miner
-men--my father complained of an ache in his head or an ache in his
-stomach or some malady equally cogent, and said he would not play.
-
-“I’ll have me poipe an’ me mug av beer,” he said, “an’ resht mesilf a
-bit. It’s loike I’ll feel betther afther a whoile an’ then I’ll take a
-haand.”
-
-Play began, while my suffering father with his aches, his tobacco and
-his beer, sat nursing himself at a near-by table. I lost no time in
-acquiring my magic ace of hearts and at once the stream of usual fortune
-set in to flow my way.
-
-Ten years, yes, one year later, my suspicions touching my father’s
-illness and his reasons for this unprecedented respite from the cares of
-forty-five would have stood more on tiptoe. As it was, however, it never
-assailed me as a thought that I had become the subject of ancestral
-doubts. I cheated on and on, and made hay while the sun shone with never
-a cloud in the sky.
-
-It was not noticed by me, but following a halfhour’s play and while I
-was shuffling the cards for a deal, my parent stole noiselessly
-behind my chair. He reached under my arm and lifted the corner of the
-concealing handkerchief which filled my lap. Horrors! there lay the
-tell-tale ace of hearts!
-
-Even then I realized nothing and knew not that my villainy was made
-bare. This news, however, was not long in its arrival.
-
-“Niver did I r-raise a boy to be a r-robber!” roared my father.
-
-Coincident with this remark, the paternal hand--not the lightest nor
-least formidable on Tom’s Run--dealt me a buffet on the head that lifted
-me from my sinful chair and hurled me across the room and against the
-wall full fifteen feet away. My teeth clattered, my wits reeled, while
-my ill-gotten silver danced blithely to metallic music of its own.
-
-“Niver did I r-raise a boy to be a r-robber!” again shouted my father.
-Then seizing me by the collar, he lifted me to my feet. “Put all your
-money on the ta-able!” he cried; “put ivry groat av it!”
-
-There was no escape; I was powerless in the talons of an inexorable
-fate. My pockets yielded a harvest of hardby seventy-five
-dollars--something more than the total of my winnings--and this was
-placed in the center of the table which had so lately witnessed my
-skill. An even distribution was then made by my father among the
-victims, each getting his share of the recovered treasure; my father
-keeping none for himself though urged by the others to that end.
-
-“No,” said my father; “I’ll touch niver a penny av it. You take th’
-money; I’ll make shift that the dishgrace of bein’ fa-ather to a
-rapparee shall do for me share!”
-
-With that, he withdrew from the scene of my downfall, carrying me fast
-in his clutch; and later--bathed in tears of pain and shame--I was
-dragged into the presence of my mother and Father Glennon by the
-ignominious ear.
-
-It did not cure me of cards, however; I ran the whole gamut of gambling
-and won dangerous prominence as a sharper of elevation and rank.
-To-morrow evening, should you care to listen, I may unfold concerning
-other of my adventures; I may even relate--as a tale most to my
-diplomatic glory, perhaps--how I brought Casino Joe to endow me with
-that great secret, richer, in truth! than the mines of Peru! of “How to
-Tell the Last Four.”
-
-*****
-
-“Speakin’ of gamblin’,” observed the Old Cattleman when the Red Nosed
-Gentleman had come to a full stop, “I’ll bet a bloo stack that
-as we-alls sets yere talkin’, the games is goin’ brisk an’ hot in
-Wolfville. Thar won’t be no three foot of snow to put a damper on trade
-an’ hobble a gent’s energies in Arizona.” This last with a flush of
-pride.
-
-“Does everybody gamble in the West?” asked the Sour Gentleman.
-
-“Every sport who’s got the dinero does,” responded the Old Cattleman.
-“White folks, Injuns an’ Mexicans is right now at roulette an’ faro bank
-an’ monte as though they ain’t got a minute to live. I hates to
-concede ’em so much darin’, but the Mexicans, speshul, is zealous for
-specyoolations. Which they’d shore wager their immortal souls on the
-turn of a kyard, only a Greaser’s soul don’t own no market valyoo.”
-
-“If you will,” said the Jolly Doctor, “you might tell us something of
-Mexicans and their ways, their labors and relaxations--their loves and
-their hates. I’d be pleased to hear of those interesting people from one
-who knows them so thoroughly.”
-
-“Which I shore knows ’em,” returned the Old Cattleman, “an’ as
-I concedes how each gent present oughter b’ar his share of the
-entertainment, I’ll tell you of Chiquita of Chaparita.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER IX.--CHIQUITA OF CHAPARITA.
-
-Which I doubts some if I’m a proper party to be a historian of
-Mexicans. Nacherally I abhors ’em; an’ when a gent abhors anything,
-that is a Caucasian gent, you-all can gamble the limit he won’t do it
-jestice. His prejudices is bound to hit the surface like one of these
-yere rock ledges in the mountains. Be white folks ag’in Mexicans? Gents,
-the paleface is ag’in everybody but himse’f; ag’in Mexicans, niggers,
-Injuns, Chinks--he’s ag’in ’em all; the paleface is overbearin’ an’
-insolent, an’ because he’s the gamest fighter he allows he’s app’inted
-of Providence to prance ‘round, tyrannizin’ an’ makin’ trouble for
-everybody whose color don’t match his own. Shore, I’m as bad as others;
-only I ain’t so bigoted I don’t savey the fact.
-
-Doc Peets is the one white gent I encounters who’s willin’ to mete out
-to Mexicans a squar’ deal from a squar’ deck. I allers reckons these
-yere equities on Peets’ part arises a heap from his bein’ a scientist.
-You take a scientist like Peets an’ the science in him sort o’ submerges
-an’ drowns out what you-all might term the racial notions native to
-the hooman soil. They comes to concloosions dispassionate, that a-way,
-scientists does; an’ Mexicans an’ Injuns reaps a milder racket at their
-hands. With sech folks as Old Man Enright an’ me, who’s more indoorated
-an’ acts on that arrogance which belongs with white folks at birth,
-inferior races don’t stand no dazzlin’ show.
-
-Mexicans, as a herd, is stunted an’ ondeveloped both mental an’
-physical. They bears the same compar’son to white folks that these yere
-little broncos does to the big hosses of the States. In intellects,
-Mexicans is about ’leven hands high. To go into one of their jimcrow
-plazas is like retreatin’ back’ard three hundred years. Their idees of
-agriculture is plenty primitive. An’ their minds is that bogged down
-in ignorance you-all can’t teach ’em nothin’. They clings to their
-worm-eaten customs like a miser to his money. Their plow is a wedge
-of wood; they hooks on about three yoke of bulls--measley, locoed
-critters--an’ with four or five Greasers to screech an’ herd an’ chunk
-up the anamiles they goes stampedin’ back’ard an’ for’ard on their
-sandy river-bottom fields--the same bein’ about as big as a saddle
-blanket--an’ they calls that plowin’. They sows the grain as they plows,
-sort o’ scratches it in; an’ when it comes up they don’t cut it none
-same as we-all harvests a crop. No; they ain’t capable of sech wisdom.
-They pulls it up by the roots an’ ties it in bundles. Then they sweeps
-off a clean spot of earth like the floor of one of these yere brickyards
-an’ covers it with the grain same as if it’s a big mat. Thar’s a corral
-constructed ‘round it of posts an’ lariats; an’ next, on top of the mat
-of grain, they drives in the loose burros, cattle, goats, an’ all things
-else that’s got a hoof; an’ tharupon they jams this menagerie about
-ontil the grain is trodden out. That’s what a Greaser regyards as
-threshin’ grain, so you can estimate how ediotic he is. When it’s
-trompled sufficient, he packs off the stalks an’ straw to make mats an’
-thatches for the ’dobies; while he scrapes up the dust an’ wheat into a
-blanket an’ climbs onto the roof of his _casa_ an’ pours it down slow
-onto the ground, an’ all so it gives the wind a openin’ to get action
-an’ blow away the chaff an’ dust.
-
-But what’s the use of dilatin’ on savageries like that? I could push
-for’ard an’ relate how they makes flour with a stone rollin’-pin in a
-stone trough; how they grinds coffee by wroppin’ it in a gunny sack an’
-beatin’ it with a rock; but where’s the good? It would only go lowerin’
-your estimates of hooman nature to no end.
-
-Whatever be their amoosements? Everything on earth amooses ’em. They
-has so many holidays, Mexicans does, they ain’t hardly left no time for
-work. They’re pirootin’ about constant, grinnin’ an’ chatterin’ like a
-outfit of bloo-jays.
-
-No; they ain’t singers none. Takin’ feet an’ fingers, that a-way, a
-Mexican is moosical. They emerges a heap strong at dancin’, an’ when
-it conies to a fandango, hens on hot griddles is examples of listless
-abstraction to ’em. With sech weepons, too, as guitars an’ fiddles
-an’ a gourd half-full of gravel to shake an’ beat out the time, they
-can make the scenery ring. Thar they stops, however; a Greaser’s
-moosic never mounts higher than the hands. At singin’, crows an’ guinea
-chickens lays over ’em like a spade flush over nines-up.
-
-Most likely if I reelates to you-all the story of a day among the
-Mexicans you comes to a cl’arer glimpse of their loves an’ hates an’
-wars an’ merry-makin’s. Mexicans, like Injuns when a paleface is about,
-lapses into shyness an’ timidity same as one of these yere cottontail
-rabbits. But among themse’fs, when they feels onbuckled an’ at home,
-their play runs off plenty different. Tharfore a gent’s got to study
-Mexicans onder friendly auspices, an’ from the angle of their own
-home-life, if he’s out to rope onto concloosions concernin’ them that’ll
-stand the tests of trooth.
-
-It’s one time when I’m camped in the Plaza Chaparita. It’s doorin’ the
-eepock when I freights from Vegas to the Canadian over the old Fort
-Bascom trail. One of the mules--the nigh swing mule, he is--quits on me,
-an’ I has to lay by ontil that mule recovers his sperits.
-
-It’s a _fieste_ or holiday at the Plaza Chaparita. The first local sport
-I connects with is the padre. He’s little, brown, an’ friendly; an’ has
-twinklin’ beady eyes like a rattlesnake; the big difference bein’ that
-the padre’s eyes is full of fun, whereas the optics of rattlesnakes is
-deevoid of humor utter. Shore; rattlesnakes wouldn’t know a joke from
-the ace of clubs.
-
-The padre’s on his way to the ’dobe church; an’ what do you-all figger
-now that divine’s got onder his arm? Hymn books, says you? That’s where
-you’re barkin’ at a knot. The padre’s packin’ a game chicken--which
-the steel gaffs, drop-socket they be an’ of latest sort, is in his
-pocket--an’ as I goes squanderin’ along in his company, he informs me
-that followin’ the services thar’ll be a fight between his chicken an’
-a rival brass-back belongin’ to a commoonicant named Romero. The padre
-desires my presence, an’ in a sperit of p’liteness I allows I’ll come
-idlein’ over onless otherwise engaged, the same bein’ onlikely.
-
-Gents, you should have witnessed that battle! It’s shore lively carnage;
-yes, the padre’s bird wins an’ downs Romero’s entry the second buckle.
-
-On the tail of the padre’s triumph, one of his parishioners gets locoed,
-shakes a chicken outen a bag an’ proclaims that he’ll fight him ag’in
-the world for two dollars a side. At that another enthoosiast gives
-notice that if the first parishioner will pinch down his bluff to one
-dollar--he says he don’t believe in losin’ an’ winnin’ fortunes on a
-chicken--he’ll prodooce a bird an’ go him once.
-
-The match is made, an’ while the chickens is facin’ each other a heap
-feverish an’ fretful, peckin’ an’ see-sawin’ for a openin’, the various
-Greasers who’s bet money on ’em lugs out their beads an’ begins
-to pray to beat four of a kind. Shore, they’re prayin’ that their
-partic’lar chicken ’ll win. Still, when I considers that about as many
-Greasers is throwin’ themse’fs at the throne of grace for one as for the
-other, if Providence is payin’ any attention to ’em--an’ I deems it
-doubtful--I estimates that them orisons is a stand-off.
-
-As the birds goes to the center, one party sprinkles something on his
-chicken. At that the opposition grabs up his bird an’ appeals to
-the padre. He challenges the other’s bird because he says he’s been
-sprinkled with holy-water.
-
-The padre inquires, an’ the holy-water sharp confesses his guilt. Also,
-he admits that he hides the gaffs onder the altar cloth doorin’ the
-recent services so they’ll acquire extra grace an’ power.
-
-The padre turns severe at this an’ declar’s the fight off; an’ he
-forfeits the doctored chicken an’ the gaffs to himse’f a whole lot--he
-representin’ the church--to teach the holy-water sharp that yereafter
-he’s not to go seizin’ onfair advantages, an’ to lead a happier an’ a
-better life. That culprit don’t say a word but passes over his chicken
-an’ the steel regalia for its heels. You can bet that padre’s word is
-law in the Plaza Chaparita!
-
-Followin’ this fiasco of the holy-water chicken the Mexicans disperses
-themse’fs to pulque an’ monte an’ the dance. The padre an’ me sa’nters
-about; me bein’ a Americano, an’ him what you might call professionally
-sedate, we-all don’t go buttin’ into the _baile_ nor the pulque nor the
-gamblin’. The padre su’gests that we go a-weavin’ over to his own camp,
-which he refers to as Casa Dolores--though thar’s nothin’ dolorous about
-it, the same bein’ the home of mirth an’ hilarity, that a-way--an’
-he allows he’s got some Valley Tan hived up that’ll make me forget my
-nationality if stoodiously adhered to. It’s needless to observe that I
-accompanies the beady-eyed padre without a struggle. An’ I admits,
-free an’ without limitation, that said Valley Tan merits the padre’s
-encomiums an’ fixes me in my fav’rite theery that no matter what
-happens, the best happens to the church.
-
-As we crosses the little Plaza on our way to Casa Dolores we passes
-in front of the church. Thar on the grass lays the wooden image of the
-patron saint of the Plaza Chaparita. This figger is about four foot
-long, an’ thar’s a hossha’r lariat looped onto it where them Mexicans
-who gets malcontent with the saint ropes him off his perch from up in
-front of the church. They’ve been haulin’ the image about an’ beatin’ it
-with cactus sticks an’ all expressive of disdain.
-
-I asks the padre why his congregation engages itse’f in studied
-contoomely towards the Plaza’s saint. He shrugs his shoulders, spreads
-his hands palm out, an’ says it’s because the Plaza’s sheep gets sick.
-I su’gests that him an’ me cut in an’ rescoo the saint; more partic’lar
-since the image is all alone, an’ the outfit that’s been beatin’ him
-up has abandoned said corrections to drink pulque an’ exercise their
-moccasins in the _baile_. But the padre shakes his head. He allows it’s
-a heap better to let the public fully vent its feelin’s. He explains
-that when the sheep gets well the congregation ’ll round-up the image,
-give him a reproachful talk an’ a fresh coat of paint, an’ put him back
-on his perch. The saint ’ll come winner on the deal all right, the padre
-says.
-
-“Besides,” argues the padre, “it is onneces-sary for pore blinded
-mortals to come pawin’ about to protect a saint. These yere images,”
- he insists, “can look after themse’fs. They’ll find the way outen their
-troubles whenever they gets ready.”
-
-At that we proceeds for’ard to Casa Dolores an’ the promised Valley Tan,
-an’ leaves the wooden saint to his meditations on the grass. After all,
-I agrees with the padre. It’s the saint’s business to ride herd on
-the interests of the Plaza Chaparita; an’ if he goes to sleep on the
-lookout’s stool an’ takes to neglectin’ sech plays as them sheep gettin’
-sick, whatever is the Greasers goin’ to do? They’re shore bound to
-express their disapproval; an’ I reckons as good a scheme as any is to
-caper up, yank the careless image outen his niche with a lariat, an’ lam
-loose an’ cavil at him with a club.
-
-This yere _fieste_ at the Plaza Chaparita is a day an’ night of
-laughter, dance an’ mirth. But it ends bad. The padre an’ me is over to
-the dance-hall followin’ our investigations touchin’ the Valley Tan
-an’ the padre explains to me how he permits to his people a different
-behavior from what’s possible among Americanos.
-
-“I studies for the church in Baltimore,” the padre says, “an’ thar the
-priest must keep a curb on his Americano parishioners. They are not like
-Mexicanos. They’re fierce an’ headlong an’ go too far. If you let them
-gamble, they gamble too much; if you let them drink, they drink too
-much. The evil of the Americano is that he overplays. It is not so
-with the Mexicano. If the Mexicano gambles, it is only a trifle an’ for
-pleasure; if he drinks, it is but enough to free a bird’s song in his
-heart. All my people drink an’ dance an’ gamble; but it’s only play,
-it is never earnest. See! in the whole Plaza Chaparita you find no
-drunkard, no pauper; no one is too bad or too good or too rich or too
-poor or too unhappy.”
-
-Then the priest beams on me like he disposes of the question; an’ since
-I’ve jest been drinkin’ his Valley Tan I don’t enter no protests to what
-he states. From what ensoos, however, I should jedge the padre overlooks
-his game in one partic’lar.
-
-As me an’ the padre sits gazin’ on at the dance, a senorita with a dark
-shawl over her head, drifts into the door like a shadow. She’s little;
-an’ by what I sees of her face, she’s pretty. As she crosses in front
-of the padre she stops an’ sort o’ drops down on one knee with her head
-bowed. The padre blesses her an’ calls her “Chiquita;” then she goes on.
-I don’t pay no onusual attention; though as me an’ the padre talks,
-I notes her where she stands with her shawl still over her head in a
-corner of the dance hall.
-
-Across from the little Chiquita is a young Greaser an’ his sweetheart.
-This girl is pretty, too; but her shawl ain’t over her head an’ she
-an’ her _muchacho_, from their smiles an’ love glances, is havin’ the
-happiest of nights.
-
-“It looks like you’ll have a weddin’ on your hands,” I says to the
-padre, indicatin’ where the two is courtin’.
-
-“Chiquita should not stay here,” says the padre talkin’ to himse’f. With
-that he organizes like he’s goin’ over to the little shawled senorita in
-the corner.
-
-It strikes me that the padre’s remark is a heap irrelevant. But I soon
-sees that he onderstands the topics he tackles a mighty sight better
-than me. The padre’s hardly moved when it looks like the senorita
-Chiquita saveys he’s out to head her off. With that she crosses the
-dance-hall swift as a cat an’ flashes a knife into the heart of the
-laughing girl. The next moment the knife is planted in her own.
-
-It’s the old story, so old an’ common thar’s not a new word to be said.
-Two dead girls; love the reason an’ the jealous knife the trail. Thar’s
-not a scream, not a word; that entire _baile_ stands transfixed. As the
-padre raises the little Chi-quita’s head, I sees the tears swimmin’ in
-his eyes. It’s the one time I comes nearest thinkin’ well of a Mexican;
-that padre, at least, is toler’ble.
-
-“That is a very sad finale--the death of the girls,” observed the Sour
-Gentleman, reaching for the Scotch whiskey as though for comfort’s sake.
-“And still, the glimpse you gave would move me to a pleasant estimate of
-Mexicans.”
-
-“Why then,” returned the Old Cattleman, becoming also an applicant for
-Scotch, “considered as abstract prop’sitions, Mexicans aint so bad.
-Which they’re like Injuns; they improves a lot by distance. An’ they has
-their strong p’ints, too; gratitoode is one. You-all confer a favor on a
-Mexican, an’ he’ll hang on your trail a hundred years but what he’ll do
-you a favor in return. An’ he’ll jest about pay ten for one at that.
-
-“Speakin’ of gratitoode, Sioux Sam yere tells a story to ’llustrate
-how good deeds is bound to meet their reward. It’s what the squaws tells
-the papooses to make ’em kind.” Then to Sioux Sam: “Give us the tale
-of Strongarm an’ the Big Medicine Elk. The talk is up to you.”
-
-Sioux Sam was in no sort diffident, and readily told us the following:
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER X.--HOW STRONGARM WAS AN ELK.
-
-Moh-Kwa was the wisest of all the beasts along the Upper Yellowstone;
-an’ yet Moh-Kwa could not catch a fish. This made Moh-Kwa have a bad
-heart, for next to honey he liked fish. What made it worse was that in
-Moh-Kwa’s cavern where he lived, there lay a deep pool which was the
-camp of many fish; an’ Moh-Kwa would sit an’ look at them an’ long for
-them, while the fish came close to the edge an’ laughed at Moh-Kwa, for
-they knew beneath their scales that he could not catch them; an’ the
-laughter of the fish made a noise like swift water running among rocks.
-Sometimes Moh-Kwa struck at a fish with his big paw, but the fish never
-failed to dive out of reach; an’ this made the other fish laugh at
-Moh-Kwa more than before. Once Moh-Kwa got so angry he plunged into the
-pool to hunt the fish; but it only made him seem foolish, for the fish
-swam about him in flashing circles, an’ dived under him an’ jumped over
-him, laughing all the time, making a play an’ a sport of Moh-Kwa. At
-last he gave up an’ swam ashore; an’ then he had to sit by his fire an’
-comb his fur all day to dry himself so that he might feel like the same
-bear again.
-
-One morning down by the Yellowstone, Moh-Kwa met Strongarm, the young
-Sioux, an’ Strongarm had a buffalo fish which he had speared in the
-river. An’ because Moh-Kwa looked at the fish hungrily an’ with water
-in his mouth, Strongarm gave him the buffalo fish. Also he asked Moh-Kwa
-why he did not catch fish since he liked them so well an’ the pool in
-his cavern was the camp of many fish. An’ Moh-Kwa said it was because
-the fish were cowards an’ would not stay an’ fight with him, but ran
-away.
-
-“They are not so brave as the bees,” said Moh-Kwa, “for when I find a
-bee-tree, they make me fight for the honey. The bees have big hearts
-though little knives, but the fish have no hearts an’ run like water
-down hill if they but see Moh-Kwa’s shadow from his fire fall across the
-pool.”
-
-Strongarm said he would catch the fish for Moh-Kwa; an’ with that he
-went to the Wise Bear’s house an’ with his spear took many fish, being
-plenty to feed Moh-Kwa two days. Moh-Kwa was very thankful, an’ because
-Strong-arm liked the Wise Bear, he came four times each moon an’ speared
-fish for Moh-Kwa who was never so well fed with fish before.
-
-Strongarm was a mighty hunter among the Sioux an’ killed more elk than
-did the ten best hunters of his village. So many elk did Strong-arm slay
-that his squaw, the Blossom, made for their little son, Feather-foot, a
-buckskin coat on which was sewed the eye-teeth of elk, two for each elk,
-until there were so many eye-teeth on Feather-foot’s buckskin coat it
-was like counting the leaves on a cottonwood to find how many there
-were. An’ the Blossom was proud of Feather-foot’s coat, for none among
-the Sioux had so beautiful a garment an’ the eye-teeth of the elk told
-how big a hunter was Strongarm.
-
-While the Sioux wondered an’ admired at the elk-tooth coat, it made the
-Big Medicine Elk, who was chief of the Elk people, hot an’ angry, an’
-turned his heart black against Strongarm. The Big Medicine Elk said he
-would have revenge.
-
-Thus it happened one day that when Strong-arm stepped from his lodge, he
-saw standing in front a great Elk who had antlers like the branches of a
-tree. An’ the great Elk stamped his foot an’ snorted at Strongarm. Then
-Strongarm took his bow an’ his lance an’ his knife an’ hunted the great
-Elk to kill him; but the great Elk ran always a little ahead just out of
-reach.
-
-At last the great Elk ran into the Pouch canyon an’ then Strongarm took
-hope into his heart like a man takes air into his mouth, for the sides
-of the Pouch canyon were high an’ steep an’ it ended with a high wall,
-an’ nothing save a bird might get out again once it went in; for the
-Pouch canyon was a trap which the Great Spirit had set when the world
-was new.
-
-Strongarm was happy in his breast as he followed the great Elk into the
-Pouch canyon for now he was sure. An’ he thought how the big eye-teeth
-of so great an Elk would look on the collar of Feather-foot’s buckskin
-coat.
-
-When Strongarm came to the upper end of the Pouch canyon, there the
-great Elk stood waiting.
-
-“Hold!” said the great Elk, when Strongarm put an arrow on his
-bowstring.
-
-[Illustration: 0157]
-
-But Strongarm shot the arrow which bounded off the great Elk’s hide an’
-made no wound. Then Strongarm ran against the great Elk with his lance,
-but the lance was broken as though the great Elk was a rock. Then
-Strongarm drew his knife, but when he went close to the great Elk, the
-beast threw him down with his antlers an’ put his forefoot on Strongarm
-an’ held him on the ground.
-
-“Listen,” said the great Elk, an’ Strongarm listened because he couldn’t
-help it. “You have hunted my people far an’ near; an’ you can never get
-enough of their blood or their eye-teeth. I am the Big Medicine Elk an’
-chief of the Elk people; an’ now for a vengeance against you, I shall
-change you from the hunter to the hunted, an’ you shall know how good it
-is to have fear an’ be an elk.”
-
-As the great Elk said this, Strongarm felt his head turn heavy with
-antlers, while his nose grew long an’ his mouth wide, an’ hair grew out
-of his skin like grass in the moon of new grass, an’ his hands an’ feet
-split into hoofs; an’ then Strong-arm stood on his four new hoofs an’
-saw by his picture in the stream that he was an elk. Also the elk-fear
-curled up in his heart to keep him ever in alarm; an’ he snuffed the
-air an’ walked about timidly where before he was Strongarm and feared
-nothing.
-
-Strongarm crept home to his lodge, but the Blossom did not know her
-husband; an’ Feather-foot, his little son, shot arrows at him; an’ as
-he ran from them, the hunters of his village came forth an’ chased
-him until Strongarm ran into the darkness of the next night as it came
-trailing up from the East, an’ the darkness was kind an’ covered him
-like a blanket an’ Strongarm was hid by it an’ saved.
-
-When Strongarm did not come with the next sun to spear fish for Moh-Kwa,
-the Wise Bear went to Strongarm’s lodge to seek him for he thought that
-he was sick. An’ Moh-Kwa asked the Blossom where was Strongarm? An’ the
-Blossom said she did not know; that Strongarm chased the great Elk
-into the Pouch canyon an’ never came out again; an’ now a big Doubt had
-spread its blankets in her heart an’ would not leave, but was making a
-long camp, saying she was a widow. Then the Blossom wept; but Moh-Kwa
-told her to wait an’ he would see, because he, Moh-Kwa, owed Strongarm
-for many fish an’ would now pay him.
-
-Moh-Kwa went to the Big Medicine Elk.
-
-“Where is the Strongarm?” said Moh-Kwa.
-
-“He runs in the hills an’ is an elk,” said the Big Medicine Elk. “He
-killed my people for their teeth, an’ a great fright was on all my
-people because of the Strongarm. The mothers dare not go down to the
-river’s edge to drink, an’ their children had no time to grow fat for
-they were ever looking to meet the Strongarm. Now he is an elk an’ my
-people will have peace; the mothers will drink an’ their babies be fat
-an’ big, being no more chased by the Strongarm.”
-
-Then Moh-Kwa thought an’ thought, an’ at last he said to the Big
-Medicine Elk:
-
-“That is all proud talk. But I must have the Strongarm back, for he
-catches my fish.”
-
-But the Big Medicine Elk said he would not give Moh-Kwa back the
-Strongarm.
-
-“Why should I?” asked the Big Medicine Elk. “Did not I save you in the
-Yellowstone,” said Moh-Kwa, “when as you swam the river a drifting tree
-caught in your antlers an’ held down your head to drown you? An’ did you
-not bawl to me who searched for berries on the bank; an’ did I not swim
-to you an’ save you from the tree?” Still the Big Medicine Elk shook his
-antlers.
-
-“What you say is of another day. You saved me an’ that is ended. I will
-not give you back the Strongarm for that. One does not drink the water
-that is gone by.”
-
-Moh-Kwa then grew so angry his eyes burned red like fire, an’ he
-threatened to kill the Big-Medicine Elk. But the Big Medicine Elk
-laughed like the fish laughed, for he said he could not be killed by any
-who lived on the land.
-
-“Then we will go to the water,” said Moh-Kwa; an’ with that he took the
-Big Medicine Elk in his great hairy arms an’ carried him kicking an’
-struggling to the Yellowstone; for Moh-Kwa could hold the Big Medicine
-Elk though he could not hurt him.
-
-When Moh-Kwa had carried the Big Medicine Elk to the river, he sat down
-on the bank an’ waited with the Big Medicine Elk in his arms until a
-tree came floating down. Then Moh-Kwa swam with the Big Medicine Elk to
-the tree an’ tangled the branches in the antlers of the Big Medicine Elk
-so that he was fast with his nose under the water an’ was sure to drown.
-
-“Now you are as you were when I helped you,” said Moh-Kwa.
-
-An’ the Catfish people in the river came with joy an’ bit the legs of
-the Big Medicine Elk, an’ said, “Thank you, Moh-Kwa; you do well to
-bring us food now an’ then since you eat so many fish.”
-
-As Moh-Kwa turned to swim again to the bank, he said over his shoulder
-to the Big Medicine Elk:
-
-“Now you may sing your death song, for Pauguk, the Death, is in the
-river with you an’ those are Pauguk’s catfish which gnaw your legs.”
-
-At this the Big Medicine Elk said between his cries of grief an’ fear
-that if Moh-Kwa would save him out of the river, he would tell him how
-to have the Strongarm back. So Moh-Kwa went again an’ freed the Big
-Medicine Elk from the tree an’ carried him to the bank, while the
-Catfish people followed, angrily crying:
-
-“Is this fair, Moh-Kwa? Do you give an’ then do you take away? Moh-Kwa!
-you are a Pawnee!”
-
-When the Big Medicine Elk had got his breath an’ wiped the tears from
-his eyes, he told Moh-Kwa that the only way to bring the Strongarm back
-to be a hunter from being one of the hunted was for Feather-foot, his
-son, to cut his throat; an’ for the Blossom, his squaw, to burn his
-elk-body with cedar boughs.
-
-“An’ why his son, the Feather-foot?” asked Moh-Kwa.
-
-“Because the Feather-foot owes the Strongarm a life,” replied the Big
-Medicine Elk. “Is not Strongarm the Feather-foot’s father an’ does not
-the son owe the father his life?”
-
-Moh-Kwa saw this was true talk, so he let the Big Medicine Elk go free.
-
-“I will even promise that the Strongarm,” said Moh-Kwa, as the two
-parted, “when again he is a Sioux on two legs, shall never hunt the Elk
-people.”
-
-But the Big Medicine Elk, who was licking his fetlocks where the Catfish
-people had hurt the skin, shook his antlers an’ replied:
-
-“It is not needed. The Strongarm has been one of the Elk people an’ will
-feel he is their brother an’ will not hurt them.”
-
-Moh-Kwa found it a hard task to capture Strongarm when now he was an elk
-with the elk-fear in his heart. For Strongarm had already learned the
-elk’s warning which is taught by all the Elk people, an’ which says:
-
- Look up for danger and look down for gain;
-
- Believe no wolf’s word, and avoid the plain.
-
-Strongarm would look down for the grass with one eye, while he kept an
-eye up among the branches or along the sides of the canyon for fear of
-mountain lions. An’ he stuck close in among the hills, an’ would not go
-out on the plains where the wolves lived; an’ he wouldn’t talk with a
-wolf or listen to his words.
-
-But Strongarm, while he ran an’ hid from Moh-Kwa and the others, was not
-afraid of the Blossom, who was his squaw, but would come to her gladly
-if he might find her alone among the trees.
-
-“It is not the first time,” said the Wise Bear, “that the hunter has
-made his trap of love.”
-
-With that he told the Blossom to go into the hills an’ call Strongarm
-to her with her love. Then she was to bind his feet so that he might not
-get away an’ run.
-
-The Blossom called Strongarm an’ he came; but he was fearful an’
-suspicious an’ his nose an’ his ears an’ his eyes kept guard until the
-Blossom put her hand on his neck; an’ then Strongarm’s great love for
-the Blossom smothered out his caution as one might smother a fire with
-a robe; an’ the Blossom tied all his feet with thongs an’ bound his eyes
-with her blanket so that Strongarm might not see an’ be afraid.
-
-Then came Feather-foot, gladly, an’ cut Strong-arm’s throat with his
-knife; for Feather-foot did not know he killed his father--for that was
-a secret thing with Moh-Kwa an’ the Blossom--an’ thought only how he
-killed a great Elk.
-
-When Strongarm was dead, Moh-Kwa toiled throughout the day carrying
-up the big cedar; an’ when a pile like a hill was made, Moh-Kwa put
-Strongarm’s elk-body on its top, an’ brought fire from his house in the
-rocks, an’ made a great burning.
-
-In the morning, the Blossom who had stayed with Moh-Kwa through the
-night while the fire burned, said, “Now, although the big elk is gone
-into ashes, I do not yet see the Strongarm.” But Moh-Kwa said, “You
-will find him asleep in the lodge.” An’ that was a true word, for when
-Moh-Kwa an’ the Blossom went to the lodge, there they found Strongarm
-whole an’ good an’ as sound asleep as a tree at midnight.
-
-Outside the lodge they met the little Feather-foot who cried, “Where
-is the big elk, Moh-Kwa, that I killed?” An’ the Blossom showed him his
-father, Strongarm, where he slept, an’ said, “There is your big elk,
-Feather-foot; an’ this will ever be your best hunting for it found you
-your father again.”
-
-When Moh-Kwa saw that everything was settled an’ well, an’ that he would
-now have always his regular fish, he wiped the sweat out of his eyes
-with his paws which were all singed fur an’ ashes, an’ said, “I am the
-weariest bear along the whole length of the Yellowstone, for I carried
-some heavy trees an’ have worked hard. Now I will sleep an’ rest.”
-
-An’ with that Moh-Kwa lay down an’ snored an’ slept four days; then he
-arose an’ eat up the countless fish which Strongarm had speared to be
-ready for him. This done, Moh-Kwa lighted his pipe of kinnikinick, an’
-softly rubbing his stomach where the fish were, said: “Fish give Moh-Kwa
-a good heart.”
-
-“Now that is what I call a pretty story,” said the Jolly Doctor.
-
-“It is that,” observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, with emphasis. “And I’ve
-no doubt the Strongarm made it a point thereafter to be careful as to
-what game he hunted. But, leaving fable for fact, my friend,”--the Red
-Nosed Gentleman addressed now the Sour Gentleman--“would you not call
-it your turn to uplift the spirits of this company? We have just enough
-time and I just enough burgundy for one more story before we go to bed.”
-
-“While our friend, the Sioux Gentleman,” responded the Sour Gentleman,
-“was unfolding his interesting fable, my thoughts--albeit I listened to
-him and lost never a word--were to the rear with the old days which came
-on the back of that catastrophe of tobacco. They come to me most clearly
-as I sit here smoking and listening, and with your permission I’ll
-relate the story of The Smuggled Silk.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XI.--THAT SMUGGLED SILK.
-
-Should your curiosity invite it, and the more since I promised you
-the story, we will now, my friends, go about the telling of that one
-operation in underground silk. It is not calculated to foster the pride
-of an old man to plunge into a relation of dubious doings of his youth.
-And yet, as I look backward on that one bit of smuggling of which I was
-guilty, so far as motive was involved, I exonerate myself. I looked on
-the government, because of the South’s conquest by the North, and that
-later ruin of myself through the machinations of the Revenue office, as
-both a political and a personal foe. And I felt, not alone morally free,
-but was impelled besides in what I deemed a spirit of justice to myself,
-to wage war against it as best I might. It was on such argument, where
-the chance proffered, that I sought wealth as a smuggler. I would
-deplete the government--forage, as it were, on the enemy--thereby to
-fatten my purse.
-
-As my hair has whitened with the sifting frosts of years, I confess
-that my sophistries of smuggling seem less and less plausible, while
-smuggling itself loses whatever of romantic glamour it may once have
-been invested with, or what little color of respect to which it might
-seem able to lay claim. This tale shall be told in simplest periods.
-That is as should be; for expression should ever be meek and subjugated
-when one’s story is the mere story of a cheat. There is scant room in
-such recital for heroic phrase. Smuggling, and paint it with what genius
-one may, can be nothing save a skulking, hiding, fear-eaten trade.
-There is nothing about it of bravery or dash. How therefore and avoid
-laughter, may one wax stately in any telling of its ignoble details?
-
-When, following my unfortunate crash in tobacco, I had cleared away the
-last fragment of the confusion that reigned in my affairs, I was driven
-to give my nerves a respite and seek a rest. For three months I had been
-under severest stress. When the funeral was done--for funeral it seemed
-to me--and my tobacco enterprise and those hopes it had so flattered
-were forever laid at rest, my soul sank exhausted and my brain was in
-a whirl. I could neither think with clearness nor plan with accuracy.
-Moreover, I was prey to that depression and lack of confidence in
-myself, which come inevitably as the corollary of utter weariness.
-
-Aware of this personal condition, I put aside thought of any present
-formulation of a future. I would rest, recover poise, and win back that
-optimism that belongs with health and youth.
-
-This was wisdom; I was jaded beyond belief; and fatigue means dejection,
-and dejection spells pessimism, and pessimism is never sagacious nor
-excellent in any of its programmes.
-
-For that rawness of the nerves I speak of, many apply themselves
-to drink; some rush to drugs; for myself, I take to music. It was
-midwinter, and grand opera was here. This was fortunate. I buried myself
-in a box, and opened my very pores to those nerve-healthful harmonies.
-
-In a week thereafter I might call myself recovered. My soul was cool,
-my eye bright, my mind clear and sensibly elate. Life and its promises
-seemed mightily refreshed.
-
-No one has ever called me superstitious and yet to begin my
-course-charting for a new career, I harked back to the old Astor House.
-It was there that brilliant thought of tobacco overtook me two years
-before. Perhaps an inspiration was to dwell in an environment. Again
-I registered, and finding it tenantless, took over again my old room.
-Still I cannot say, and it is to that hostelry’s credit, that my
-domicile at the Astor aided me to my smuggling resolves. Those last had
-growth somewhat in this fashion:
-
-I had dawdled for two hours over coffee in the café--the room and the
-employment which had one-time brought me fortune--but was incapable
-of any thought of value. I could decide on nothing good. Indeed, I did
-naught save mentally curse those revenue miscreants who, failing of
-blackmail, had destroyed me for revenge.
-
-Whatever comfort may lurk in curses, at least they carry no money
-profit; so after a fruitless session over coffee and maledictions, I
-arose, and as a calmative, walked down Broadway.
-
-At Trinity churchyard, the gates being open, I turned in and began
-ramblingly to twine and twist among the graves. There I encountered a
-garrulous old man who, for his own pleasure, evidently, devoted himself
-to my information. He pointed out the grave of Fulton, he of the
-steamboats; then I was shown the tomb of that Lawrence who would “never
-give up the ship;” from there I was carried to the last low bed of the
-love-wrecked Charlotte Temple.
-
-My eye at last, by the alluring voice and finger of the old guide, was
-drawn to a spot under the tower where sleeps the Lady Cornbury, dead now
-as I tell this, hardby two hundred years. Also I was told of that Lord
-Cornbury, her husband, once governor of the colony for his relative,
-Queen Anne; and how he became so much more efficient as a smuggler and
-a customs cheat, than ever he was as an executive, that he lost his high
-employ.
-
-Because I had nothing more worthy to occupy my leisure, I
-listened--somewhat listlessly, I promise you, for after all I was
-thinking on the future, not the past, and considering of the living
-rather than those old dead folk, obscure, forgotten in their slim
-graves--I listened, I say, to my gray historian; and somehow, after I
-was free of him, the one thing that remained alive in my memory was the
-smuggling story of our Viscount Cornbury.
-
-Among those few acquaintances I formed during my brief prosperity, was
-one with a gentleman named Harris, who owned apartments under mine
-on Twenty-second Street. Harris was elegant, educated, traveled, and
-apparently well-to-do of riches. Busy with my own mounting fortunes, the
-questions of who Harris was? and what he did? and how he lived? never
-rapped at the door of my curiosity for reply.
-
-One night, however, as we sat over a late and by no means a first bottle
-of wine, Harris himself informed me that he was employed in smuggling;
-had a partner-accomplice in the Customs House, and perfect arrangements
-aboard a certain ship. By these last double advantages, he came aboard
-with twenty trunks, if he so pleased, without risking anything from
-the inquisitiveness or loquacity of the officers of the ship; and later
-debarked at New York with the certainty of going scatheless through the
-customs as rapidly as his Inspector partner could chalk scrawlingly “O.
-K.” upon his sundry pieces of baggage.
-
-Coming from Old Trinity, still mooting Corn-bury and his smugglings,
-my thoughts turned to Harris. Also, for the earliest time, I began to
-consider within myself whether smuggling was not a field of business
-wherein a pushing man might grow and reap a harvest. The idea came to
-me to turn “free-trader.” The government had destroyed me; I would make
-reprisal. I would give my hand to smuggling and spoil the Egyptian.
-
-At once I sought Harris and over a glass of champagne--ever a favorite
-wine with me--we struck agreement. As a finale we each put in fifteen
-thousand dollars, and with the whole sum of thirty thousand dollars
-Harris pushed forth for Europe while I remained behind. Harris visited
-Lyons; and our complete investment was in a choicest sort of Lyons silk.
-The rich fabrics were packed in a dozen trunks--not all alike, those
-trunks, but differing, one from another, so as to prevent the notion as
-they stood about the wharf that there was aught of relationship between
-them or that one man stood owner of them all.
-
-It is not needed to tell of my partner’s voyage of return. It was
-without event and one may safely abandon it, leaving its relation to
-Harris himself, if he be yet alive and should the spirit him so move.
-It is enough for the present purpose that in due time the trunks holding
-our precious silk-bolts, with Harris as their convoy, arrived safe in
-New York.
-
-I had been looking for the boat’s coming and was waiting on the wharf as
-her lines and her stagings were run ashore.
-
-Our partner, the Inspector, and who was to enjoy a per cent, of the
-profits of the speculation, was named Lorns. He rapidly chalked “O. K.”
- with his name affixed to the end of each several trunk and it thereupon
-with the balance of inspected baggage was promptly piled upon the wharf.
-
-There had been a demand for drays, I remember, and on this day when
-our silks came in, I was able to procure but one. The ship did not dock
-until late in the afternoon, and at eight o’clock of a dark, foggy April
-evening, there still remained one of our trunks--the largest of all, it
-was--on the wharf. The dray had departed with the second load for that
-concealing loft in Reade Street which, during Harris’ absence, I had
-taken to be used as the depot of those smuggling operations wherein we
-might become engaged. I had made every move with caution; I had never
-employed our real names not even with the drayman.
-
-As I tell you, the dray was engaged about the second trip. This last
-large silk-trunk was left behind perforce; pile it how one might there
-had been no safe room for it on the already overloaded dray. The drayman
-promised to return and have it safely in our loft that night.
-
-For myself, I was from first to last lounging about the wharf,
-overseeing the going away of our goods. Harris, so soon as I gave him
-key and street-number, had posted to Reade Street to attend the silk’s
-reception.
-
-Waiting for the coming back of the conveying dray proved but a slow,
-dull business, and I was impatiently, at the hour I’ve named, walking
-up and down, casting an occasional glance at the big last trunk where it
-stood on end, a bit drawn out and separated from the common mountain of
-baggage wherewith the wharf was piled.
-
-One of the general inspectors, a man I had never seen but whom I knew,
-by virtue of his rank, to be superior to our chalk-wielding coparcener,
-also paced the wharf and appeared to bear me company in a distant,
-non-communicative way. This customs captain and myself, save for an
-under inspector named Quin, had the dock to ourselves. The boat was
-long in and most land folk had gotten through their concern with her
-and wended homeward long before. There were, however, many passengers of
-emigrant sort still held aboard the ship.
-
-As I marched up and down, Lorns came ashore and pretended some business
-with his superior officer. As he returned to the ship and what duties he
-had still to perform there, he made a slight signal to both myself and
-his fellow inspector, Quin, to follow him. I was well known to Lorns,
-having had several talks with him, while Harris was abroad. Quin I had
-never met; but it quickly appeared that he was a confidant of Lorns, and
-while without money interest in our affairs was ready to bear helping
-hand should the situation commence to pinch.
-
-Quin and I went severally and withal carelessly aboard ship, and not at
-all as though we were seeking Lorns. This was to darken the chief, whom
-we both surmised to be the cause of Lorn’s signal.
-
-Once aboard and gathered in a dark corner, Lorns began at once:
-
-“Let me do the talking,” said Lorns with a nervous rapidity that at once
-enlisted the ears of Quin and myself. “Don’t interrupt, but listen. The
-chief suspects that last trunk. I can tell it by the way he acts. A bit
-later, when I come ashore, he’ll ask to have it opened. Should he do so,
-we’re lost; you and I.” This last was to me. Then to Quin: “Do you see
-that long, bony Swiss, with the boots and porcelain pipe? He’s in an
-ugly mood, doesn’t speak English, and within one minute after you return
-to the wharf, he and I will be entangled in a rough and tumble riot.
-I’ll attend to that. The row will be prodigious. The chief will be sent
-for to settle the war, and when he leaves the wharf, Quin, don’t wait;
-seize on that silk trunk and throw it into the river. There’s iron
-enough clamped about the corners to sink it; besides, it’s packed so
-tightly it’s as heavy as lead, and will go to the bottom like an anvil.
-Then from the pile pull down some trunk similar to it in looks and stand
-it in its place. It’ll go in the dark. Give the new trunk my mark, as
-the chief has already read the name on the trunk. Go, Quin; I rely on
-you.”
-
-“You can trust me, my boy,” retorted Quin, cheerfully, and turning on
-his heel, he was back on the wharf in a moment, and apparently busy
-about the pile of baggage.
-
-Suddenly there came a mighty uproar aboard ship. Lorns and the Swiss,
-the latter already irate over some trouble he had experienced, were
-rolling about the deck in a most violent scrimmage, the Swiss having
-decidedly the worst of the trouble. The chief rushed up the plank; Lorns
-and the descendant of Tell and Winkelried, were torn apart; and then a
-double din of explanation ensued. After ten minutes, the chief was able
-to straighten out the difficulty--whatever its pretended cause might be
-I know not; for I held myself warily aloof, not a little alarmed by
-what Lorns had communicated--and repaired again to his station upon the
-wharf.
-
-As the chief came down the plank, Quin, who had not been a moment behind
-him in going aboard to discover the reasons of the riot, followed. Brief
-as was that moment, however, during which Quin had lingered behind,
-he had made the shift suggested by Lorns; the silk trunk was under the
-river, a strange trunk stood in its stead.
-
-As the chief returned, he walked straight to this suspected trunk and
-tipped it down with his foot. Then to Quin:
-
-“Ask Lorns to step _here_.”
-
-Quin went questing Lorns; shortly Lorns and Quin came back together. The
-chief turned in a brisk, sharp, official way to Lorns:
-
-“Did you inspect this trunk?”
-
-“I did,” said Lorns, looking at the chalk marks as if to make sure.
-
-“Open it!”
-
-No keys were procurable; the owners, Lorns said, had long since left the
-docks. But Lorns suggested that he get hammer and cold-chisel from the
-ship.
-
-The trunk was opened and found free and innocent of aught contraband.
-The chief wore a puzzled, dark look; he felt that he’d been cheated,
-but he couldn’t say how. Therefore, being wise, the chief gulped, said
-nothing, and as life is short and he had many things to do, soon after
-left the docks and went his way.
-
-“That was a squeak!” said Lorns when we were at last free of the
-dangerous chief. “Quin, I thank you.”
-
-“That’s all right,” retorted Quin, with a grin; “do as much for me some
-time.”
-
-That night, with the aid of a river pirate, our trunk, jettisoned by the
-excellent Quin, was fished up; and being tight as a drum, its contents
-had come to little harm with the baptism. At last, our dozen silk
-trunks--holding a treasure of thirty thousand dollars and whereon we
-looked to clear a heavy profit--were safe in the Reade Street loft; and
-my hasty heart, which had been beating at double speed since that almost
-fatal interference, slowed to normal.
-
-One might now suppose our woes were at an end, all danger over, and
-nothing to do but dispose of that shimmering cargo to best advantage.
-Harris and I were of that spirit-lifting view; we began on the very next
-day to feel about for customers.
-
-Harris, whose former smuggling exploits had dealt solely with gems,
-knew as little of silk as did I. Had either been expert he might have
-foreseen a coming peril into whose arms we in our blindness all but
-walked. No, our troubles were not yet done. We had escaped the engulfing
-suck of Charybdis, only to be darted upon by those six grim mouths of
-her sister monster, Scylla, over the way.
-
-Well do I recall that morning. I had seen but two possible purchasers of
-silks when Harris overtook me. His eye shone with alarm. Lorns had
-run him down with the news--however he himself discovered it, I never
-knew--that another danger yawned.
-
-Harris hurried me to our Reade Street lair and gave particulars.
-
-“It seems,” said Harris, quite out of breath with the speed we’d made
-in hunting cover, “that Stewart is for America the sole agent of these
-particular brands of silk which we’ve brought in. Some one to whom we’ve
-offered them has notified the Stewart company. At this moment and as we
-sit here, the detectives belonging to Stewart, and for all I may
-guess, the whole Central Office as well, are on our track. They want to
-discover who has these silks; and how they came in, since the customs
-records show no such importations. And there’s a dark characteristic to
-these silks. Each bolt has its peculiar, individual selvage. Each, with
-a sample of its selvage, is registered at the home looms. Could anyone
-get a snip of a selvage he could return with it to Lyons, learn from the
-manufacturers’ book just when it was woven, when sold, and to whom. I
-can tell you one thing,” observed Harris, as he concluded his story,
-“we’re in a bad corner.”
-
-How the cold drops spangled my brows! I began to wish with much heart
-that I’d never met Harris, nor heard, that Trinity churchyard day, of
-Cornbury and his smuggling methods of gathering gold.
-
-There was one ray of hope; neither Harris nor I had disclosed our names,
-nor the whereabouts or quantity of the silks; and as each had been
-dealing with folk with whom he’d never before met, we were both as yet
-mysteries unsolved.
-
-Nor were we ever solved. Harris and I kept off the streets during
-daylight hours for a full month. We were not utterly idle; we
-unpleasantly employed ourselves in trimming away that telltale selvage.
-
-Preferring safety to profit, we put forth no efforts to realize on our
-speculations for almost a year. By that time the one day’s wonder of
-“Who’s got Stewart’s silks?” had ceased to disturb the mercantile world
-and the grand procession of dry goods interest passed on and over it.
-
-At last we crept forth like felons--as, good sooth! we were--and
-disposed of our mutilated silks to certain good folk whose forefathers
-once ruled Palestine. These gentry liked bargains, and were in no wise
-curious; they bought our wares without lifting an eyebrow of inquiry,
-and from them constructed--though with that I had no concern--those long
-“circulars,” so called, which were the feminine joy a third of a century
-gone.
-
-As to Harris and myself; what with delays, what with expenses, what with
-figures reduced to dispose of our plunder, we got evenly out. We got
-back our money; but for those fear-shaken hours of two separate perils,
-we were never paid.
-
-I smuggled no more. Still, I did not relinquish my pious purpose to
-despoil that public treasury Egyptian quoted heretofore. Neither did I
-give up the Customs as a rich field of illicit endeavor. But my methods
-changed. I now decided that I, myself, would become an Inspector, like
-unto the useful Lorns, and make my fortune from the opulent inside. I
-procured the coveted appointment, for I could bring power to bear, and
-later I’ll tell you of The Emperor’s Cigars.
-
-*****
-
-When I was in my room that night, making ready for bed, I could still
-hear the soft, cold fingers of the snow upon the pane. What a storm was
-that! Our landlord who had been boy and man and was now gray in that old
-inn, declared how he had never witnessed the smothering fellow to it.
-
-The following day, while still and bright and no snow to fall, showed a
-temperature below zero. The white blockade still held us fast, and now
-the desperate cold was come to be the ally of the snow. Departure was
-never a question.
-
-As we kicked the logs into a cheerful uproar of sparks, and drew that
-evening about the great fireplace, it was the Old Cattleman to break
-conversational ground.
-
-“Do you-all know,” said he, “I shore feels that idle this evenin’ it’s
-worse’n scand’lous--it’s reedic’lous.” Here he threw himself back in
-his armchair and yawned. “Pardon these yere demonstrations of weariness,
-gents,” he observed; “they ain’t aimed at you none. That’s the fact,
-though; this amazin’ sensation of bein’ held a prisoner is beginnin’ to
-gnaw at me a heap. Talk of ‘a painted ship upon a painted ocean,’
-like that poem sharp wrote of! Why that vessel’s sedyoolously employed
-compared to us!”
-
-“You should recall,” remarked the Jolly Doctor, “how somewhere it is
-said that whatever your hand finds to do, you should do it with all your
-heart. Now, I would say the counsel applies to our present position.
-Since we must needs be idle, let us be idle heartily and happily, and
-get every good to lie hidden in what to me, at least, is a most pleasant
-companionship.”
-
-“I shore unites with you,” responded the Old Cattleman, “in them
-script’ral exhortations to do things with all your heart. It was Wild
-Bill Hickox’s way, too; an’ a Christian adherence to that commandment,
-not only saves Bill’s life, but endows him with the record for
-single-handed killin’s so far as we-all has accounts.”
-
-“Is it a story?” asked the Red Nosed Gentleman. “Once in a while I
-relish a good blood and thunder tale.”
-
-“It’s this a-way,” said the Old Cattleman. “Bill’s hand is forced by the
-Jake McCandlas gang. Bill has ’em to do; an’ rememberin’, doubtless,
-the Bible lessons of his old mother back in Illinois, he shore does
-’em with all his heart, as the good book says. This yere is the story
-of ‘The Wiping Out of McCandlas.’”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XII.--THE WIPING OUT OF McCANDLAS.
-
-Tell you-all a tale of blood? It shore irritates me a heap, gents, when
-you eastern folks looks allers to the west for stories red an’ drippin’
-with murder. Which mighty likely now the west is plenty peaceful
-compared with this yere east itse’f. Thar’s one thing you can put in
-your mem’randum book for footure ref’rence, an’ that is, for all them
-years I inhabits Arizona an’ Texas an’ sim’lar energetic localities,
-I never trembles for my life, an’ goes about plumb furtive, expectin’
-every moment is goin’ to be my next that a-way, ontil I finds myse’f
-camped on the sunrise side of the Alleghenies.
-
-Nacherally, I admits, thar has been a modicum of blood shed west an’
-some slight share tharof can be charged to Arizona. No, I can’t say I
-deplores these killin’s none. Every gent has got to die. For one, I’m
-mighty glad the game’s been rigged that a-way. I’d shore hesitate a lot
-to be born onless I was shore I’d up an’ some day cash in. Live forever?
-No, don’t confer on me no sech gloomy outlook. If a angel was to appear
-in our midst an’ saw off on me the news that I was to go on an’ on as
-I be now, livin’ forever like that Wanderin’ Jew, the information would
-stop my clock right thar. I’d drop dead in my moccasins.
-
-It don’t make much difference, when you gives yourse’f to a ca’m
-consid’ration of the question as to when you dies or how you dies. The
-important thing is to die as becomes a gent of sperit who has nothin’ to
-regret. Every one soon or late comes to his trail’s end. Life is like
-a faro game. One gent has ten dollars, another a hundred, another a
-thousand, and still others has rolls big enough to choke a cow. But
-whether a gent is weak or strong, poor or rich, it’s written in advance
-that he’s doomed to go broke final. He’s doomed to die. Tharfore, when
-that’s settled, of what moment is it whether he goes broke in an hour,
-or pikes along for a week--dies to-day or postpones his funeral for
-years an’ mebby decades?
-
-Holdin’ to these yere views, you can see without my tellin’ that a
-killin’, once it be over, ain’t likely to harass me much. Like the
-rest of you-all, I’ve been trailin’ out after my grave ever since I was
-foaled--on a hunt for my sepulcher, you may say--an’ it ought not to
-shock me to a showdown jest because some pard tracks up ag’inst his last
-restin’ place, spreads his blankets an’ goes into final camp before it
-come my own turn.
-
-But, speakin’ of killin’s, the most onusual I ever hears of is when
-Wild Bill Hickox cleans up the Jake McCandlas gang. This Bill I knows
-intimate; he’s not so locoed as his name might lead a gent to concloode.
-The truth is, he’s a mighty crafty, careful form of sport; an’ he never
-pulled a gun ontil he knew what for an’ never onhooked it ontil he knew
-what at.
-
-An’ speakin’ of the latter--the onhookin’ part--that Wild Bill never
-missed. That’s his one gift; he’s born to make a center shot whenever
-his six-shooter expresses itse’f.
-
-This McCandlas time is doorin’ them border troubles between Missouri
-an’ Kansas. Jest prior tharunto, Bill gets the ill-will of the Missouri
-outfit by some gun play he makes at Independence, then the eastern end
-of the old Santa Fe trail. What Bill accomplishes at Independence is a
-heap effectual an’ does him proud. But it don’t endear him none to the
-Missouri heart. Moreover, it starts a passel of resentful zealots to
-lookin’ for him a heap f’rocious, an’ so he pulls his freight.
-
-It’s mebby six months later when Bill is holdin’ down a stage station
-some’eres over in Kansas--it’s about a day’s ride at a road-gait from
-Independence--for Ben Holiday’s overland line. Thar’s the widow of a
-_compadre_ of Bill who has a wickeyup about a mile away, an’ one day
-Bill gets on his hoss, Black Nell, an’ goes romancin’ over to see
-how the widow’s gettin’ on. This Black Nell hoss of Bill’s is some
-cel’brated. Black Nell is tame as a kitten an’ saveys more’n a hired
-man. She’d climb a pa’r of steps an’ come sa’n-terin’ into a dance hall
-or a hurdy gurdy if Bill calls to her, an’ I makes no doubt she’d a-took
-off her own saddle an’ bridle an’ gone to bed with a pa’r of blankets,
-same as folks, if Bill said it was the proper antic for a pony.
-
-It’s afternoon when Bill rides up to pow-wow with this relict of his
-pard. As he comes into the one room--for said wickeyup ain’t palatial,
-an’ consists of one big room, that a-way, an’ a jim-crow leanto--Bill
-says:
-
-“Howdy, Jule?” like that.
-
-“Howdy, Bill?” says the widow. “’Light an’ rest your hat, while I
-roam ’round an’ rustle some chuck.” This widow has the right idee.
-
-While Bill is camped down on a stool waitin’ for the promised _carne_
-an’ flap-jacks, or whatever may be the grub his hostess is aimin’ to
-on-loose, he casts a glance outen the window. He’s interested at once.
-Off across the plains he discerns the killer, McCandlas an’ his band
-p’intin’ straight for the widow’s. They’re from Missouri; thar’s ’leven
-of ’em, corral count, an’ all “bad.” As they can see his mare, Black
-Nell, standin’ in front of the widow’s, Bill argues jestly that the
-McCandlas outfit knows he’s thar; an’ from the speed they’re makin’ in
-their approach, he likewise dedooces that they’re a heap eager for his
-company.
-
-Bill don’t have to study none to tell that thar’s somebody goin’ to get
-action. It’s likely to be mighty onequal, but thar’s no he’p; an’ so
-Bill pulls his gun-belt tighter, an’ organizes to go as far as he can.
-He has with him only one six-shooter; that’s a severe setback. Now, if
-he was packin’ two the approaching war jig would have carried feachers
-of comfort. But he’s got a nine-inch bowie, which is some relief. When
-his six-shooter’s empty, he can fall back on the knife, die hard, an’
-leave his mark.
-
-As Bill rolls the cylinder of his gun to see if she’s workin’ free,
-an’ loosens the bowie to avoid delays, his eye falls on a rifle hangin’
-above the door.
-
-“Is it loaded, Jule?” asks Bill.
-
-“Loaded to the gyards,” says the widow.
-
-“An’ that ain’t no fool of a piece of news, neither,” says Bill, as he
-reaches down the rifle. “Now, Jule, you-all better stampede into the
-cellar a whole lot ontil further orders. Thar’s goin’ to be heated times
-’round yere an’ you’d run the resk of gettin’ scorched.”
-
-“I’d sooner stay an’ see, Bill,” says the widow. “You-all knows how
-eager an’ full of cur’osity a lady is,” an’ here the widow beams on Bill
-an’ simpers coaxin’ly.
-
-“An’ I’d shore say stay, Jule,” says Bill, “if you could turn a trick.
-But you sees yourse’f, you couldn’t. An’ you’d be in the way.”
-
-Thar’s a big burrow out in the yard; what Kansas people deenominates as
-a cyclone cellar. It’s like a cave; every se’f-respectin’ Kansas fam’ly
-has one. They may not own no bank account; they may not own no good
-repoote; but you can gamble, they’ve got a cyclone cave.
-
-Shore, it ain’t for ornament, nor yet for ostentation. Thar’s allers a
-breeze blowin’ plenty stiff across the plains. Commonly, it’s strenyous
-enough to pick up a empty bar’l an’ hold it ag’inst the side of a
-buildin’ for a week. Sech is the usual zephyr. Folks don’t heed them
-none. But now an’ then one of these yere cyclones jumps a gent’s camp,
-an’ then it’s time to make for cover. Thar’s nothin’ to be said back to
-a cyclone. It’ll take the water outen a well, or the money outen your
-pocket, or the ha’r off your head; it’ll get away with everything about
-you incloodin’ your address. Your one chance is a cyclone cellar; an’
-even that refooge ain’t no shore-thing, for I knowed a cyclone once that
-simply feels down an’ pulls a badger outen his hole. Still, sech as the
-last, is onfrequent.
-
-The widow accepts Bill’s advice an’ makes for the storm cave. This
-leaves Bill happy an’ easy in his mind, for it gives him plenty of
-room an’ nothin’ to think of but himse’f. An’ Bill shore admires a good
-fight.
-
-He don’t have long to wait after the widow stampedes. Bill hears the
-sweep of the ’leven McCandlas hosses as they come chargin’ up. No,
-he can’t see; he ain’t quite that weak-minded as to be lookin’ out the
-window.
-
-As the band halts, Bill hears McCandlas say:
-
-“Shore, gents; that’s Wild Bill’s hoss. We’ve got him treed an’ out on
-a limb; to-morry evenin’ we’ll put that long-ha’red skelp of his in a
-showcase in Independence.” Then McCandlas gives a whoop, an’ bluffs Bill
-to come out. “Come out yere, Bill; we needs you to decide a bet,” yells
-McCandlas. “Come out; thar’s no good skulkin’.”
-
-“Say, Jake,” retorts Bill; “I’ll gamble that you an’ your hoss thieves
-ain’t got the sand to come after me. Come at once if you comes; I
-despises delays, an’ besides I’ve got to be through with you-all an’
-back to the stage station by dark.”
-
-“I’ll put you where thar ain’t no stage lines, Bill, long before dark,”
- says McCandlas. An’ with that he comes caperin’ through the window,
-sash, glass, an’ the entire lay-out, as blithe as May an’ a gun in each
-hand.
-
-Bill cuts loose the Hawkins as he’s anxious to get the big gun off his
-mind. It stops McCandlas, “squar’ in the door,” as they says in monte;
-only it’s the window. McCandlas falls dead outside.
-
-“An’ I’m sorry for that, too,” says Bill to him-se’f. “I’m preemature
-some about that shot. I oughter let Jake come in. Then I could have got
-his guns.”
-
-When McCandlas goes down, the ten others charges with a whoop. They
-comes roarin’ through every window; they breaks in the door; they
-descends on Bill’s fortress like a ’possum on a partridge nest!
-
-An’ then ensoos the busiest season which any gent ever cuts in upon. The
-air is heavy with bullets an’ thick with smoke. The walls of the room
-later looks like a colander.
-
-It’s a mighty fav’rable fight, an’ Bill don’t suffer none in his repoote
-that Kansas afternoon. Faster than you can count, his gun barks; an’
-each time thar’s a warrior less. One, two, three, four, five, six; they
-p’ints out after McCandlas an’ not a half second between ’em as they
-starts. It was good luck an’ good shootin’ in combination.
-
-It’s the limit; six dead to a single Colt’s! No gent ever approaches it
-but once; an’ that’s a locoed sharp named Metzger in Raton. He starts in
-with Moulton who’s the alcade, an’ beefs five an’ creases another; an’
-all to the same one gun. The public, before he can reload, hangs Metzger
-to the sign in front of the First National Bank, so he don’t have much
-time to enjoy himse’f reviewin’ said feats.
-
-Rifle an’ six-shooter empty; seven dead an’ done, an’ four to take his
-knife an’ talk it over with! That’s the situation when Bill pulls his
-bowie an’ starts to finish up.
-
-It shore ain’t boy’s play; the quintette who’s still prancin’ about the
-field is as bitter a combination as you’d meet in a long day’s ride.
-Their guns is empty, too; an’ they, like Bill, down to the steel. An’
-thar’s reason to believe that the fight from this p’int on is even
-more interestin’ than the part that’s gone before. Thar’s no haltin’ or
-hangin’ back; thar ain’t a bashful gent in the herd. They goes to the
-center like one man.
-
-Bill, who’s as quick an’ strong as a mountain lion, with forty times the
-heart an’ fire, grips one McCandlas party by the wrist. Thar’s a twist
-an’ a wrench an’ Bill onj’ints his arm.
-
-That’s the last of the battle Bill remembers. All is whirl an’ smoke an’
-curse an’ stagger an’ cut an’ stab after that, with tables crashin’ an’
-the wreck an’ jangle of glass.
-
-But the end comes. Whether the struggle from the moment when it’s got
-down to the bowies lasts two minutes or twenty, Bill never can say. When
-it’s over, Bill finds himse’f still on his feet, an’ he’s pushin’ the
-last gent off his blade. Split through the heart, this yere last sport
-falls to the floor in a dead heap, an’ Bill’s alone, blood to both
-shoulders.
-
-Is Bill hurt? Gents, it ain’t much likely he’s put ’leven fightin’
-men into the misty beyond, the final four with a knife, an’ him plumb
-scatheless! No, Bill’s slashed so he wouldn’t hold hay; an’ thar’s more
-bullets in his frame than thar’s pease in a pod. The Doc who is called
-in, an’ who prospects Bill, allers allowed that it’s the mistake of his
-life he don’t locate Bill an’ work him for a lead mine.
-
-When the battle is over an’ peace resoomes its sway, Bill begins to
-stagger. An’ he’s preyed on by thirst. Bill steadies himse’f along the
-wall; an’ weak an’ half blind from the fogs of fightin’, he feels his
-way out o’ doors.
-
-Thar’s a tub of rain-water onder the eaves; it’s the only thing Bill’s
-thinkin’ of at the last. He bends down to drink; an’ with that, faints
-an’ falls with his head in the tub.
-
-It’s the widow who rescoos Bill; she emerges outen her cyclone cellar
-an’ saves Bill from drownin’. An’ he lives, too; lives to be downed
-years afterward when up at Deadwood a timid party who don’t dare come
-’round in front, drills Bill from the r’ar. But what can you look for?
-Folks who lives by the sword will perish by the sword as the scripters
-sets forth, an’ I reckons now them warnin’s likewise covers guns.
-
-“And did that really happen?” asked the Red Nosed Gentleman, drawing a
-deep breath.
-
-“It’s as troo as that burgundy you’re absorbin’,” replied the Old
-Cattleman.
-
-“I can well believe it,” observed the Sour Gentleman; “a strong hour
-makes a strong man. Did this Wild Bill Hickox wed the widow who pulled
-him out of the tub?”
-
-“Which I don’t think so,” returned the Old Cattleman. “If he does, Bill
-keeps them nuptials a secret. But it’s a cinch he don’t. As I says at
-the jump, Bill is a mighty wary citizen an’ not likely to go walkin’
-into no sech ambuscade as a widow.”
-
-“You do not think, then,” observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, “that a wife
-would be a blessing?”
-
-“She wouldn’t be to Wild Bill Hickox,” said the Old Cattleman. “Thar is
-gents who ought never to wed, an’ Bill’s one. He was bound to be killed
-final; the game law was out on Bill for years. Now when a gent is shore
-to cash in that a-way, why should he go roundin’ up a wife? Thar oughter
-be a act of congress ag’in it, an’ I onderstand that some sech measure
-is to be introdooced.”
-
-“Passing laws,” remarked the Jolly Doctor, “is no such easy matter, now,
-as passing the bottle.” Here the Jolly Doctor looked meaningly at the
-Red Nosed Gentleman, who thereupon shoved the burgundy into the Jolly
-Doctor’s hand with all conceivable alacrity. Like every good drinker,
-the Red Nosed Gentleman loved a cup companion. “There was a western
-person,” went on the Jolly Doctor, “named Jim Britt, who came east to
-have a certain law passed; he didn’t find it flowers to his feet.”
-
-“What now was the deetails?” said the Old Cattleman. “The doin’s an’
-plottin’s an’ doubleplays of them law-makin’ mavericks in congress is
-allers a heap thrillin’ to me.”
-
-“Very well,” responded the Jolly Doctor; “let each light a fresh cigar,
-for it’s rather a long story, and when all are comfortable, I’ll give
-you the history of ‘How Jim Britt Passed His Bill.’”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XIII.--HOW JIM BRITT PASSED HIS BILL.
-
-Last Chance was a hamlet in southeastern Kansas. Last Chance, though
-fervid, was not large. Indeed, a cowboy in a spirit of insult born of
-a bicker with the town marshal had said he could throw the loop of
-his lariat about Last Chance and drag it from the map with his pony.
-However, this was hyperbole.
-
-Jim Britt was not the least conspicuous among the men of Last Chance.
-Withal, Jim Britt was much diffused throughout the commerce of that
-village and claimed interests in a dozen local establishments, from
-a lumber yard to a hotel. Spare of frame, and of an anxious predatory
-nose, was Jim Britt; and his gray eyes ever roving for a next
-investment; and the more novel the enterprise, the more leniently did
-Jim Britt regard it. The new had for him a fascination, since he was in
-way and heart an Alexander and hungered covetously for further worlds to
-conquer. Thus it befell that Jim Britt came naturally to his desire to
-build a railway when the exigencies of his affairs opened gate to the
-suggestion.
-
-Jim Britt became the proprietor of a lead mine--or was it zinc?--in
-southeastern Missouri, and no mighty distance from his own abode of Last
-Chance. The mine was somewhat thrust upon Jim Britt by Fate, since
-he accepted it for a bad debt. It was “lead mine or nothing,” and Jim
-Britt, whose instincts, like Nature, abhorred a vacuum, took the mine.
-It was a good mine, but a drawback lurked in the location; it lay over
-the Ozark Hills and far away from any nearest whistle of a railroad.
-
-This isolation taught Jim Britt the thought of connecting his mine by
-rail with Last Chance; the latter was an easiest nearest point, and the
-route offered a most accommodating grade. A straight line, or as the
-crow is said to fly but doesn’t, would make the length of the proposed
-improvement fifty miles. When done, it would serve not only Jim Britt’s
-mine, but admirably as a feeder for the Fort Scot and Gulf; and Jim
-Britt foresaw riches in that. Altogether, the notion was none such
-desperate scheme.
-
-There was a side serious, however, which must be considered. The line
-would cross the extreme northeast angle of the Indian Territory, or as
-it is styled in those far regions, the “Nation,” and for this invasion
-of redskin holdings the consent of the general government, through its
-Congress assembled, must be secured.
-
-Jim Britt; far from being depressed, said he would go to Washington and
-get it; he rather reveled in the notion. Samantha, his wife, shook her
-head doubtfully.
-
-“Jim Britt,” said Samantha, severely, “you ain’t been east since Mr.
-Lincoln was shot. You know no more of Washington than a wolf. I’d give
-that railroad up; and especially, I’d keep away from Congress. Don’t
-try to braid that mule’s tail”--Samantha was lapsing into the metaphor
-common of Last Chance--“don’t try to braid that mule’s tail. It’ll kick
-you plumb out o’ the stall.”
-
-But Jim Britt was firm; the mule simile in no sort abated him.
-
-[Illustration: 0199]
-
-“But what could you do with Congress?” persisted Samantha; “you, a
-stranger and alone?”
-
-Jim Britt argued that one determined individual could do much; energy
-wisely employed would overcome mere numbers. He cited the ferocious
-instance of a dim relative of his own, a vivacious person yclept Turner,
-who because of injuries fancied or real, hung for years about the tribal
-flanks of the Comanches and potted their leading citizens. This the
-vigorous Turner kept up until he had corralled sixty Comanche top-nots;
-and the end was not yet when the Comanches themselves appealed to their
-agent for protection. They said they couldn’t assemble for a green corn
-dance, or about a regalement of baked dog, without the Winchester of the
-unauthorized Turner barking from some convenient hill; the squaws would
-then have nothing left but to wail the death song of some eminent spirit
-thus sifted from their midst. When they rode to the hill in hunt of
-Turner, he would be miles away on his pony, and adding to his safety
-with every jump. The Comanches were much disgusted, and demanded the
-agent’s interference.
-
-Upon this mournful showing, Turner was brought in and told to desist;
-and as a full complement of threats, which included among their features
-a trial at Fort Smith and a gibbet, went with the request, Turner was
-in the end prevailed on to let his Winchester sleep in its rack, and
-thereafter the Comanches danced and devoured dog unscared. The sullen
-Turner said the Comanches had slain his parent long ago; the agent
-expressed regrets, but stuck for it that even with such an impetus a
-normal vengeance should have run itself out with the conquest of those
-sixty scalps.
-
-Jim Britt told this story of Turner to Samantha; and then he argued that
-as the Comanches were made to feel a one-man power by the industrious
-Turner, so would he, Jim Britt, for all he stood alone, compel Congress
-to his demands. He would take that right of way across the Indian
-Territory from between their very teeth. He was an American citizen and
-Congress was his servant; in this wise spake Jim Britt.
-
-“That’s all right,” argued the pessimistic Samantha; “that’s all right
-about your drunken Turner; but he had a Winchester. Now you ain’t goin’
-to tackle Congress with no gun, Jim Britt.”
-
-Despite the gloomy prophecies of Samantha, whom Jim Britt looked on as
-a kind of Cassandra without having heard of Cassandra, our would-be
-railroad builder wound up the threads and loose ends of his Last Chance
-businesses, and having, as he described it, “fixed things so they
-would run themselves for a month,” struck out for Washington. Jim Britt
-carried twenty-five hundred dollars in his pocket, confidence in his
-heart, and Samantha’s forebode of darkling failure in his ears.
-
-While no fop and never setting up to be the local Brummel, Jim Britt’s
-clothes theretofore had matched both his hour and environment, and held
-their decent own in the van of Last Chance fashion. But the farther
-Jim Britt penetrated to the eastward in his native land, the more his
-raiment seemed to fall behind the age; and at the last, when he was
-fairly within the gates of Washington, he began to feel exceeding wild
-and strange. Also, it affected him somewhat to discover himself almost
-alone as a tobacco chewer, and that a great art preserved in its
-fullness by Last Chance had fallen to decay along the Atlantic. These,
-however, were questions of minor moment, and save that his rococo garb
-drove the sensitive Jim Britt into cheap lodgings in Four-and-one-half
-Street, instead of one of the capital’s gilded hotels, they owned no
-effect.
-
-This last is set forth in defence against an imputation of parsimony
-on the side of Jim Britt. He was one who spent his money like a king
-whenever and wherever his education or experience pointed the way. It
-was his clothes of a remote period to make him shy, else Jim Britt would
-have shrunk not from the Raleigh itself, but climbed and clambered
-and browsed among the timberline prices of its grill-room, as safe and
-satisfied as ever browsed mountain goat on the high levels of its upland
-home. Yea, forsooth! Jim Britt, like a sailor ashore, could spend his
-money with a free and happy hand.
-
-Jim Britt, acting on a hint offered of his sensibilities, for a
-first step reclothed himself from a high-priced shop; following these
-improvements, save for the fact that he appalled the eye as a trifle
-gorgeous, he might not have disturbed the sacred taste of Connecticut
-Avenue itself. In short, in the matter of garb, Jim Britt, while
-audible, was down to date.
-
-With the confidence born of his new clothes--for clothes in some
-respects may make the man--Jim Britt sate him down to study Congress.
-He deemed it a citadel to be stormed; not lacking in military genius he
-began to look it over for a weak point.
-
-These adventures of Jim Britt now about a record, occurred, you should
-understand, almost a decade ago. In that day there should have been
-eighty-eight senators and three hundred and fifty-six representatives,
-albeit, by reason of death or failure to elect, a not-to-be-noticed
-handful of seats were vacant.
-
-By an industrious perusal of the Congressional directory, wherein the
-skeleton of each House was laid out and told in all its divers committee
-small-bones, Jim Britt began to understand a few of the lions in his
-path. For his confusion he found that Congress was sub-divided into full
-sixty committees, beginning with such giant conventions as the Ways and
-Means, Appropriations, Military, Naval, Coinage, Weights and Measures,
-Banking and Currency, Indian, Public Lands, Postal, and Pensions, and
-dwindling down to ignoble riffraff--which owned each a chairman, a
-committee room, a full complement of clerks and messengers, and an
-existence, but never convened--like the Committee on Acoustics and
-Ventliation, and Alcoholic Liquor Traffic.
-
-Jim Britt learned also of the Sergeants at Arms of Senate and House, and
-how these dignitaries controlled the money for those bodies and paid the
-members their salaries. Incidentally, and by way of gossip, he was told
-of that House Sergeant who had levanted with the riches entrusted to his
-hands, and left the broken membership, gnashing its teeth in poverty and
-impotent gloom, unable to draw pay.
-
-Then, too, there was a Document Room where the bills and resolutions
-were kept when printed. Also, about each of the five doors of House
-and Senate, when those sacred gatherings were in session, there were
-situated a host of messengers, carried for twelve hundred dollars a year
-each on the Doorkeeper’s rolls. It was the duty and pleasure of these
-myrmidons to bring forth members into the corridors, to the end that
-they be refreshed with a word of counsel from constituents who had
-traveled thither for that purpose; and in the finish to lend said
-constituents money to return home.
-
-Jim Britt, following these first connings of the directory, went
-personally to the capitol, and from the galleries, leaning his chin on
-the rail the while, gazed earnestly on greatness about the transaction
-of its fame. These studies and personally conducted tours, and those
-conversations to be their incident which came off between Jim Britt
-and chance-blown folk who fell across his pathway, enlarged Jim Britt’s
-store of information in sundry fashions. He discovered that full ten
-thousand bills and resolutions were introduced each Congress; that by
-virtue of a mere narrowness of time not more than five per cent, of this
-storm of business could be dealt with, the other ninety-five, whether
-for good or ill, being starved to death for lack of occasion. The
-days themselves were no longer than five working hours since Congress
-convened at noon.
-
-The great radical difference between House and Senate loomed upon Jim
-Britt in a contrast of powers which abode with the presiding officers of
-those mills to grind new laws. The president of the Senate owned few
-or none. He might enforce Jefferson’s rules for debates and call a
-recalcitrant senator to order, a call to which the recalcitrant paid
-little heed beyond tart remarks on his part concerning his own high
-determinations to yield to no gavel tyranny, coupled with a forceful
-though conceited assurance flung to the Senate at large, that he, the
-recalcitrant, knew his rights (which he never did), and would uphold
-them (which he never failed to do.) The Senate president named no
-committees; owned no control over the order of business; indeed he was
-limited to a vote on ties, a warning that he would clear the galleries
-(which was never done) when the public therein roosting, applauded, and
-the right to prevent two senators from talking at one and the same time.
-These marked the utmost measure of his influence. Any senator could get
-the floor for any purpose, and talk on any subject from Prester John to
-Sheep in the Seventeenth Century, while his strength stood. Also, and
-much as dogs have kennels permitted them for their habitation, the
-presiding officer of the Senate--in other words, the Vice-President of
-the nation--was given a room, separate and secluded to himself, into
-which he might creep when chagrin for his own unimportance should
-overmaster him or otherwise his woes become greater than he might
-publicly bear.
-
-The House Speaker was a vastly different cock, with a louder crow and
-longer spur. The Speaker was a king, indeed; and an absolute monarch
-or an autocrat or what you will that signifies one who may do as he
-chooses, exercise unbridled will, and generally sit beneath the broad
-shadows of the vine and the fig tree of his prerogatives with none to
-molest him or make him afraid. The Speaker was, so to phrase it, the
-entire House, the other three hundred and fifty-five members acting only
-when he consented or compelled them, and then usually by his suggestion
-and always under his thumb. No bill could be considered without the
-Speaker’s permission; and then for so long only as he should allow, and
-by what members he preferred. No man could speak to a measure wanting
-the gracious consent of this dignitary; and no word could be uttered--at
-least persisted in--To which he felt distaste. The Speaker, when lengths
-and breadths are measured, was greater than the Moscow Czar and showed
-him a handless infant by comparison.
-
-As a half-glove of velvet for his iron hand, and to mask and soften
-his pure autocracy--which if seen naked might shock the spirit of
-Americanism--there existed a Rules Committee. This subbody, whereof the
-Speaker was chief, carried, besides himself, but two members; and these
-he personally selected, as indeed he did the entire membership of every
-committee on the House muster-rolls. This Rules Committee, with the
-Speaker in absolute sway, acted with reference to the House at large as
-do the Board of Judges for a racecourse. It declared each day what bills
-should be taken up, limited debate, and to pursue the Track simile to a
-last word, called on this race or cleared the course of that race, and
-fairly speaking dry-nursed the House throughout its travels, romps and
-lessons.
-
-Jim Britt discovered that in all, counting Speaker, Rules Committee,
-and a dozen chairmen of the great committees, there existed no more
-than fifteen folk who might by any stretch of veracity be said to have
-a least of voice in the transaction of House business. In the gagged
-and bound cases of the other three hundred and forty-one, and for what
-public good or ill to flow from them, their constituents would have
-fared as well had they, instead of electing these representatives,
-confined themselves to writing the government a letter setting forth
-their wants.
-
-In reference to his own bill, Jim Britt convinced himself of two
-imposing truths. Anybody would and could introduce it in either House or
-Senate or in both at once; then, when thus introduced and it had taken
-the routine course to the proper committee, the situation would ask
-the fervent agreement of a majority in each body, to say nothing of the
-Speaker’s consent--a consent as hard to gain as a girl’s--to bring it up
-for passage.
-
-Nor was there any security of concert. The bill might be fashionable,
-not to say popular, with one body, while the other turned rigid back
-upon it. It might live in the House to die in the Senate, or succeed in
-the Senate and perish in the House. There were no safety and little hope
-to be won in any corner, and the lone certainty to peer forth upon Jim
-Britt was that the chances stood immeasurably against him wherever he
-turned his eyes. The camel for the needle’s eye and the rich man
-into heaven, were easy and feasible when laid side by side with the
-Congressional outlook for his bill.
-
-While Jim Britt was now sensibly cast down and pressed upon by despair,
-within him the eagerness for triumph grew taller with each day. For one
-daunting matter, should he return empty of hand, Samantha would wear
-the fact fresh and new upon her tongue’s end to the last closing of his
-eyes. It would become a daily illustration--an hourly argument in her
-practiced mouth.
-
-There was one good to come to Jim Britt by his investigations and that
-was a good instruction. Like many another, Jim Britt, from the deceitful
-distance of Last Chance, had ever regarded both House and Senate
-as gigantic conspiracies. They were eaten of plot and permeated of
-intrigue; it was all chicane and surprise and sharp practice. Congress
-was a name for traps and gins and pits and snares and deadfalls. The
-word meant tunnels and trap-doors and vaults and dungeons and sinister
-black whatnot. Jim Britt never paused to consider wherefore Congress
-should, for ends either clean or foul, conceal within itself these
-midnight commodities of mask and dark-lantern, and go about its destiny
-a perennial Guy Fawkes, ready to explode a situation with a touch and
-blow itself and all concerned to far-spread flinders. Had he done so he
-might have dismissed these murky beliefs.
-
-It is, however, never too late to mend. It began now to dawn upon Jim
-Britt by the morning light of what he read and heard and witnessed, that
-both Houses in their plan and movement were as simple as a wire fence;
-no more recondite than is a pair of shears. They might be wrong, but
-they were not intricate; they might spoil a deal of cloth in their
-cutting, or grow dull of edge or loose of joint and so not cut at
-all, but they were not mysterious. Certainly, Congress was no more a
-conspiracy than is a flock of geese, and a brooding hen would be as
-guilty of a plot and as deep given to intrigue. Congress was a stone
-wall or a precipice or a bridgeless gulf or chloroform or what one
-would that was stupefying or difficult of passage to the border of the
-impossible, but there dwelt nothing occult or secret or unknowable in
-its bowels. These truths of simplicity Jim Britt began to learn and,
-while they did not cheer, at least they served to clear him up.
-
-Following two weeks of investigation, Jim Britt secured the introduction
-of his bill. This came off by asking; the representative from the Last
-Chance district performing in the one body, while one of the Kansas
-senators acted in the more venerable convention.
-
-Now when the bill was introduced, printed, and in the lap of the proper
-committee, Jim Britt went to work to secure the bill’s report. He might
-as well have stormed the skies to steal a star; he found himself as
-helpless as a fly in amber.
-
-About this hour in his destinies, Jim Britt made a radical and, as
-it turned, a decisive move. He had now grown used to Washington and
-Washington to him, and while folk still stared and many grinned, Jim
-Britt did not receive that ovation as he moved about which marked and
-made unhappy his earlier days in the town. Believing it necessary to his
-bill’s weal, Jim Britt began to haunt John Chamberlin’s house of call as
-then was, and to scrape acquaintance with statesmen who passed hours of
-ease and wine in its parlors.
-
-In the commencement of his Chamberlin experiences Jim Britt met much
-to affright him. A snowy-bearded senator from Nevada sat at a table. On
-seeing Jim Britt smile upon him in a friendly way--he was hoping to make
-the senator’s acquaintance--he of the snow-beard, apropos of nothing,
-suddenly thundered:
-
-“I have this day read John Sherman’s defence of the Crime of
-’Seventy-Three. John Sherman contends that no crime was committed
-because no criminals were caught.”
-
-This outburst so dismayed Jim Britt that he sought a far corner and no
-more tempted the explosiveness of Snow-Beard.
-
-Again, Jim Britt would engage a venerable senator from Alabama in talk.
-He was instantly taken by the helpless button, and for a quintette of
-hours told of the national need of a Panama Canal, and given a list of
-what railroads in their venality set the flinty face of their opposition
-to its coming about.
-
-These things, the thunders of Snow-Beard and the exhaustive settings
-forth of the senator from the south, pierced Jim Britt; for he reflected
-that if the questions of silver and Panama could not be budged for their
-benefit by these gentlemen of beard and long experience and who dwelt
-well within the breastworks of legislation, then his bill for that small
-right of way, and none to aid it save himself in his poor obscurity,
-could hope for nothing except death and burial where it lay.
-
-There was a gentleman of Congress well known and loved as the Statesman
-from Tupelo. He was frequent and popular about Chamberlin’s. The
-Statesman from Tupelo was a humorist of celebration and one of the
-redeeming features of the House of Representatives. His eye fell upon
-the queer, ungainly form of Jim Britt, with hungry face, eyes keen but
-guileless, and nose of falcon curve.
-
-The Statesman from Tupelo beheld in Jim Britt with his Gothic simplicity
-a self-offered prey to the spear of every joker. The Statesman from
-Tupelo, with a specious suavity of accent and a blandness irresistible,
-drew forth Jim Britt in converse. The latter, flustered, flattered, went
-to extremes of confidence and laid frankly bare his railroad hopes and
-fears which were now all fears.
-
-The Statesman from Tupelo listened with decorous albeit sympathetic
-gravity. When Jim Britt was done he spoke:
-
-“As you say,” observed the Statesman from Tupelo, “your one chance is
-to get acquainted with a majority of both Houses and interest them
-personally in your bill.”
-
-“But how might a party do that soonest?” asked Jim Britt. “I don’t want
-to camp yere for the balance of my days. Besides, thar’s Samantha.”
-
-“Certainly, there’s Samantha,” assented the Statesman from Tupelo. Then
-following a pause:
-
-“I suppose the readiest method would be to give a dinner. Could you
-undertake that?”
-
-“Why, I reckon I could.”
-
-The dinner project obtained kindly foothold in the breast of Jim Britt;
-he had read of such banquet deeds as a boy when the papers told the
-splendors of Sam Ward and the Lucullian day of the old Pacific Mail. Jim
-Britt had had no experience of Chamberlin prices, since his purchases at
-that hotel had gone no farther a-field than a now-and-then cigar. He had
-for most part subsisted at those cheap restaurants which--for that there
-be many threadbare folk, spent with their vigils about Congress, hoping
-for their denied rights--are singularly abundant in Washington. These
-modest places of regale would give no good notion of Chamberlin’s, but
-quite the contrary. Wherefore, Jim Britt, quick with railway ardor and
-to get back to the far-away Samantha, took the urgent initiative, and
-said he would order the dinner for what night the Statesman from Tupelo
-deemed best, if only that potent spirit would agree to gather in the
-guests.
-
-“We will have the dinner, then,” said He of Tupelo, “on next Saturday.
-You can tell Chamberlin; and I’ll see to the guests.”
-
-“How many?” said Chamberlin’s steward, when he received the orders of
-Jim Britt.
-
-The coming railway magnate looked at the Statesman from Tupelo.
-
-“Say fifty,” remarked the Statesman from Tupelo.
-
-Jim Britt was delighted. He would have liked sixty guests better, or
-if one might, one hundred; but fifty was a fair start. There could come
-other dinners, for the future holds a deal of room. In time Jim Britt
-might dine a full moiety of Congress. The dinner was fixed; the menu
-left to the steward’s ingenuity and taste; and now when the situation
-was thus relaid, and Saturday distant but two days, Jim Britt himself
-called for an apartment at Chamberlin’s, sent for his one trunk, and
-established himself on the scene of coming dinner action to have instant
-advantage of whatever offered that might be twisted to affect his
-lead-mine road.
-
-The long tables for Jim Britt’s dinner were spread in a dining room
-upstairs. There were fifty covers, and room for twenty more should
-twenty come. The apartment itself was a jungle of tropical plants,
-and the ground plan of the feast laid on a scale of bill-threatening
-magnificence.
-
-This was but right. For when the steward would have consulted the
-exultant Jim Britt whose florid imaginings had quite carried him off his
-feet, that gentleman said simply:
-
-“Make the play with the bridle off! Don’t pinch down for a chip.”
-
-Thereupon the steward cast aside restraint and wandered forth upon that
-dinner with a heart care-free and unrestrained. He would make of it a
-moment of terrapin and canvas-back and burgundy which time should date
-from and folk remember for long to the Chamberlin praise.
-
-Saturday arrived, and throughout the afternoon Jim Britt, by grace
-of the good steward, who had a pride of his work and loved applause,
-teetered in and out of the dining room and with dancing eye and mouth
-ajar gave rein to admiration. It would be a mighty dinner; it would land
-his bill in his successful hands, and make, besides, a story to amaze
-the folk of Last Chance to a standstill. These be not our words; rather
-they flowed as the advance jubilations of Jim Britt.
-
-There was one thought to bear upon Jim Britt to bashful disadvantage.
-The prospect of entertaining fifty statesmen shook his confidence and
-took his breath. To repair these disasters he called privily from time
-to time for whiskey.
-
-It was not over-long before he talked thickly his encomiums to the
-steward. On his last visit to survey that fairyland of a dining room,
-Jim Britt counted covers laid for several hundred guests; what was still
-more wondrous, he believed they would come and the prospect rejoiced
-him. There were as many lights, too, in the chandeliers as stars of a
-still winter’s night, while the apartment seemed as large as a ten-acre
-lot and waved a broad forest of foliage.
-
-That he might be certainly present on the arrival of the first
-guest--for Jim Britt knew and felt his duties as a host--Jim Britt
-lay down upon a lounge which, to one side, was deeply, sweetly bowered
-beneath the overhanging palms. Then Jim Britt went earnestly to sleep
-and was no more to be aroused than a dead man.
-
-The Statesman from Tupelo appeared; by twos and threes and tens,
-gathered the guests; Jim Britt slept on the sleep of innocence without
-a dream. A steering committee named to that purpose on the spot by the
-Statesman from Tupelo, sought to recover Jim Britt to a knowledge of
-his fortunate honors. Full sixty guests were there, and it was but
-right that he be granted the pleasure, not to say the glory, of their
-acquaintance.
-
-It was of no avail; Jim Britt would not be withdrawn from slumbers deep
-as death. The steering committee suspended its labors of restoration. As
-said the chairman in making his report, which, with a wine glass in his
-hand, he subsequently did between soup and fish:
-
-“Our most cunning efforts were fruitless. We even threw water on him,
-but it was like throwing water on a drowned rat.”
-
-Thus did his slumbers defend themselves, and Jim Britt snore unchecked.
-
-But the dinner was not to flag. The Statesman from Tupelo took the head
-of the table and the chairman of the steering committee the foot, the
-repast proceeded while wine and humor flowed.
-
-It was a dream of a dinner, a most desirable dinner, a dinner that
-should stand for years an honor to Jim Britt of Last Chance. It raged
-from eight till three. Corks and jokes were popping while laughter
-walked abroad; speeches were made and songs were sung. Through it all,
-the serene founder of the feast slept on, and albeit eloquence took
-up his name and twined about it flowery compliment, he knew it not.
-Tranquilly on his lounge he abode in dear oblivion.
-
-Things mundane end and so did Jim Britt’s dinner. There struck an hour
-when the last song was sung, the last jest was made, and the last
-guest departed away. The Statesman from Tupelo superintended the
-transportation of Jim Britt to his room, and having made him safe, He
-of Tupelo went also out into the morning, and that famous banquet was of
-the perfumed past.
-
-It dawned Wednesday before the Statesman from Tupelo called again at
-Chamberlin’s to ask for the excellent Jim Britt. The Statesman from
-Tupelo explained wherefore he was thus laggard.
-
-“I thought,” he said to Chamberlin, “that our friend would need Sunday,
-Monday and Tuesday to straighten up his head.”
-
-“The man’s gone,” said Chamberlin; “he departed Monday morning.”
-
-“And whither?”
-
-“Home to Last Chance.”
-
-“What did he go home for?”
-
-“That dinner broke him, I guess. It cost about eighteen hundred dollars,
-and he only had a little over a hundred when the bill was paid.”
-
-The Statesman from Tupelo mused, while clouds of regret began to gather
-on his brow. His conscience had him by the collar; his conscience was
-avenging that bankruptcy of Jim Britt.
-
-The Statesman from Tupelo received Jim Britt’s address from the hands
-of Chamberlin’s clerk. The next day the Statesman from Tupelo wrote Jim
-Britt a letter. It ran thus:
-
-Chamberlin’s Hotel.
-
-My Dear Sir:--
-
-Don’t come back. Write me in full the exact story of what you want and
-why you want it. I’ve got a copy of your bill from the Document Room,
-and so soon as I hear from you, shall urge the business before the
-proper committee.
-
-When Jim Britt’s reply came to hand, the Statesman from Tupelo--whom
-nobody could resist--prevailed on the committee to report the bill. Then
-he got the Speaker, who while iron with others was as wax in the hands
-of the Statesman from Tupelo, to recognize him to bring up the bill.
-The House, equally under his spell, gave the Statesman from Tupelo its
-unanimous consent, and the bill was carried in the blink of a moment to
-its third reading and put upon its passage. Then the Statesman from
-Tupelo made a speech; he said it was a confession.
-
-The Statesman from Tupelo talked for fifteen minutes while the House
-howled. He told the destruction of Jim Britt. He painted the dinner and
-pointed to those members of the House who attended; he reminded them of
-the desolation which their appetites had worked. He said the House was
-disgraced in the downfall of Jim Britt, and admitted that he and his
-fellow diners were culpable to a last extreme. But there was a way to
-repair all. The bill must be passed, the stain on the House must be
-washed away, Jim Britt must stand again on his fiscal feet, and then he,
-the Statesman from Tupelo, and his fellow conspirators, might once more
-look mankind in the eye.
-
-There be those who will do for laughter what they would not do for
-right. The House passed Jim Britt’s bill unanimously.
-
-The Statesman from Tupelo carried it to the Senate. He explained the
-painful situation and described the remedy. Would the Senate unbend from
-its stern dignity as the greatest deliberative body of any clime or age,
-and come to the rescue of the Statesman from Tupelo and the House of
-Representatives now wallowing in infamy?
-
-The Senate would; by virtue of a kink in Senate rules which permitted
-the feat, the Jim Britt Bill was instantly and unanimously adopted
-without the intervention of a committee, the ordering a reference or a
-roll-call. The Statesman from Tupelo thanked the Senate and withdrew,
-pretending emotion.
-
-There was one more journey to make, one more power to consult, and the
-mighty work would be accomplished. The President must sign the bill. The
-Statesman from Tupelo walked in on that tremendous officer of state and
-told him the tale of injury done Jim Britt. The Statesman from Tupelo,
-by way of metaphor, called himself and his fellow sinners, cannibals,
-and showed how they had eaten Jim Britt. Then he reminded the President
-how he had once before gone to the rescue of cannibals in the case of
-Queen Lil. Would he now come to the relief of the Statesman from Tupelo
-and his fellow Anthropophagi of the House?
-
-The President was overcome with the word and the idea; he scribbled his
-name in cramped copperplate, and the deed was done. The Jim Britt Bill
-was a law, and Jim Britt saved from the life-long taunts of Samantha,
-the retentive. The road from Last Chance to the lead mine was built,
-and on hearing of its completion the Statesman from Tupelo wrote for an
-annual pass.
-
-*****
-
-“Then it was luck after all,” said the Red
-
-Nosed Gentleman, “rather than management to save the day for your Jim
-Britt.”
-
-“Entirely so,” conceded the Jolly Doctor.
-
-“There’s a mighty deal in luck,” observed the Red Nosed Gentleman,
-sagely. “Certainly, it’s the major part in gambling, and I think,
-too, luck is a decisive element in every victory or defeat a man
-experiences.”
-
-“And, now,” observed the Sour Gentleman, “now that you mention gambling,
-suppose you redeem your promise and give us the story of ‘How to Tell
-the Last Four.’ The phrase is dark to me and has no meaning, but I
-inferred from what you were saying when you used it, that you alluded
-to some game of chance. Assuredly, I crave pardon if I be in error,” and
-now the Sour Gentleman bowed with vast politeness.
-
-“You are not in error,” returned the Red Nosed Gentleman, “and I did
-refer to gambling. Casino, however, when played by Casino Joe was no
-game of chance, but of science; his secret, he said in explanation, lay
-in ‘How to Tell the Last Four.’”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XIV.--HOW TO TELL THE LAST FOUR.
-
-Casino Joe, when thirty years ago he came about the Bowery, was in
-manner and speech a complete expression of the rustical. His brow was
-high and fine and wise; but lank hair of yellow spoiled with its ragged
-fringe his face--a sallow face, wide of mouth and with high cheek bones.
-His garb was farmerish; kip-skin boots, coat and trousers of gray jeans,
-hickory shirt, and soft shapeless hat. Nor was Casino Joe in disguise;
-these habiliments made up the uniform of his ancestral New Hampshire.
-Countryman all over, was Casino Joe, and this look of the uncouth served
-him in his chosen profession.
-
-Possibly “chosen” as a term is indiscreet. Gamblers are born and not
-made; they occur and they do not choose; they are, compared with more
-conservative and lawful men, what wolves are to honest dogs--cousins,
-truly, but tameless depredators, living lean and hard, and dying when
-die they do, neglected, lone and poor. Yet it is fate; they are born to
-it as much as is the Ishmael wolf and must run their midnight downhill
-courses.
-
-Gamblers, that is true gamblers, are folk of specialties. Casino Joe’s
-was the game which gave to him his name--at casino he throve invincibly.
-
-“It is my gift,” he said.
-
-Two things were with Casino Joe at birth; the genius for casino and that
-jack-knife talent to whittle which belongs with true-born Yankees.
-Of this latter I had proof long after poor Casino Joe wras dead and
-nourishing the grass. The races were in Boston; it was when Goldsmith
-Maid reigned Queen of the trotting turf. Her owner came to me at the
-Adams House and told how the aged sire of Goldsmith Maid, the great
-Henry Clay, was in his equine, joint-stiffened dotage pastured on a not
-too distant farm. He was eager to have a look at the old horse; and I
-went with him for this pilgrimage.
-
-As we drove up to the tavern which the farmstead we sought surrounded,
-my curious eye was caught by a fluttering windmill contrivance perched
-upon the gable. It was the figure of a woman done in pine and perhaps
-four feet of height, carved in the somewhat airy character of a ballet
-dancer. Instead of a dance, however, the lady contented herself with an
-exhibition of Indian Club swinging--one in each pine palm; the breeze
-offering the whirling impulse--in the execution wherof she poised
-herself with one foot on a wooden ball not unlike the arrowing bronze
-Diana of Madison Square. This figure, twirling clubs, as a mere windmill
-would have been amazing enough; but as though this were not sufficiently
-wondrous, at regular intervals our ballet dancer shifted her feet on
-the ball, replacing the right with the left and again the left with the
-right in measured alternation. The miracle of it held me transfixed.
-
-The host came fatly to his front stoop and smiled upon my wide-eyed
-interest.
-
-“Where did you get it?” I asked.
-
-“That was carved with a jack-knife,” replied mine host, “by a party
-called ‘Casino Joe.’ It took him’most a year; he got it mounted and
-goin’ jest before he died.”
-
-For long I had lost trace of Casino Joe; it was now at this change house
-I blundered on the news how my old gambling friend of the Bowery came
-with his consumption and some eight thousand dollars--enough to end
-one’s life with--and made this place home until his death. His grave lay
-across a field in the little rural burying ground where he had played
-when a boy, for Casino Joe was native of these parts.
-
-There were no cheatings or tricky illicitisms hidden in Joe’s
-supremacies of casino. They were works of a wax-like memory which kept
-the story of the cards as one makes entries in a ledger. When the last
-hands were out between Joe and an adversary, a glance at his mental
-entries of cards already played, and another at his own hand, unerringly
-informed him of what cards his opponent held. This he called “Telling
-the last four.”
-
-It was as an advantage more than enough to enable Joe to win; and while
-I lived in his company, I never knew him to be out of pocket by that
-divertisement. The marvel was that he could keep accurate track of
-fifty-two cards as they fell one after the other into play, and do
-these feats of memory in noise-ridden bar-rooms and amid a swirl of
-conversation in which he more or less bore part.
-
-Those quick folk of the fraternity whom he encountered and who from time
-to time lost money to Casino Joe, never once suspected his victories to
-be a result of mere memory. They held that some cheat took place. But
-as it was not detectable and no man might point it out, no word of fault
-was uttered. Joe took the money and never a protest; for it is as much
-an axiom of the gaming table as it is of the law that “Fraud must
-be proved and will never be presumed or inferred.” With no evidence,
-therefore, the losing gamblers made no protesting charge, and Joe went
-forward collecting the wealth of any and all who fought with him at his
-favorite science.
-
-Casino Joe, as I have said, accounted for his mastery at casino by his
-power to “Tell the last four,” and laid it all to memory.
-
-“And yet,” said Joe one evening as I urged him to impart to me his
-secret more in detail, “it may depend on something else. As I’ve told
-you, it’s my gift. Folk have their gifts. Once when I was in the town
-of Warrensburg in Western Missouri, I was shown a man who had gifts
-for mathematics that were unaccountable. He was a coarse, animalish
-creature, this mathematician; a half idiot and utterly without
-education. A sullen, unclean beast of a being, he shuffled about in
-a queer, plantigrade fashion like a bear. He was ill-natured, yet too
-timid to do harm; and besides a genius for figures, his distinguishing
-characteristics were hunger measured by four men’s rations and an
-appetite for whiskey which to call swinish would be marking a weakness
-on one’s own part in the art of simile. Yet this witless creature,
-unable to read his own printed name, knew as by an instinct every
-mathematical or geometrical term. You might propose nothing as a problem
-that he would not instantly solve. He could tell you like winking,
-the area of a seven or eight-angled figure so you but gave him the
-dimensions; he would announce the surface measurements of a sphere when
-told either its diameter or circumference. Once, as a poser, a learned
-teacher proposed a supposititious cone seven feet in altitude and with a
-diameter of three feet at the base, and asked at what distance from the
-apex it should be divided to make both parts equal of bulk and weight.
-The gross, growling being made correct, unhesitating reply. This monster
-of mathematics seemed also to carry a chronometer in his stomach, for
-day or night, he could and would--for a drink of rum--tell you the hour
-to any splinter of a second. You might set your watch by him as if he
-were the steeple clock. I don’t profess,” concluded Casino Joe, “to
-either the habits or the imbecility of this genius of figures, yet it
-may well be that my abilities to keep track of fifty-two Cards as
-they appear in play and know at every moment--as a bookkeeper does
-a balance--what cards are yet to come, are not of cultivation or
-acquirement, but were extant within me at my birth.” When Casino
-Joe appeared in the Bowery he came to gamble at cards. That buzzing
-thoroughfare was then the promenade of the watchful brotherhood of
-chance. In that hour, too, it stood more the fashion--for there are
-fashions in gambling as in everything else--to win and lose money at
-short-cards, and casino enjoyed particular vogue. There were scores
-of eminent practitioners about New York, and Joe had little trouble in
-securing recognition. Indeed, he might have played the full twenty-four
-hours of every day could he have held up his head to such labors.
-
-There was at the advent of our rural Joe into metropolitan circles none
-more alert or breathless for pastmastery in unholy speculation than
-myself. About twenty-one should have been my years, and I carried that
-bubbling spirit for success common to the youth of every walk. _Aut
-Cosar aut nullus!_ was my warcry, and I did not consider Joe and his
-career for long before I was slave to the one hope of finally gaining
-his secret. One might found fortune on it; like the philosopher’s stone
-it turned everything to gold.
-
-With those others who fell before Joe I also believed his success to be
-offspring of some cheat. And while the rustic Joe was engaged against
-some fellow immoralist, I’ve sat and watched for hours upon end to
-discover what winding thing Joe did. There was no villainy of double
-dealing or chicane of cut-shifting or of marked cards at which I was
-not adept. And what I could so darkly perform I was equally quick to
-discover when another attempted it. But, albeit I eyed poor Joe with a
-cat’s vigilance--a vigilance to have saved the life of Argus had he but
-emulated it with his hundred eyes--I noted nothing. And the reason was a
-simple one. There was literally nothing to discover; Joe played honestly
-enough; his advantage dwelt in his memory and that lay hidden within his
-head.
-
-Despairing of a discovery by dint of watching, I made friendly overtures
-to Joe, hoping to wheedle a secret which I could not surprise. My
-proffers of comradeship were met more than half way. Joe was a kindly
-though a lonely soul and had few friends; his queer garb of the
-cowpastures together with his unfailing domination at casino kept
-others of the fraternity at a distance. Also I had been much educated of
-books by Father Glennon, and put in my spare time with reading. As Joe
-himself had dived somewhat into books, we were doubly drawn to each
-other. Hours have we sat together in Joe’s nobly furnished rooms--for
-he lived well if he did not dress well--and overhauled for our mutual
-amusement the literature of the centuries back to Chaucer and his Tabard
-Inn.
-
-At this time Joe was already in the coils of that consumption whereof at
-last he died. And what with a racking cough and an inability to breathe
-while lying down, Joe seldom slept in a bed. The best he might do was to
-gain what snatches of slumber he could while propped in an arm-chair. It
-thus befell that at his suggestion and to tell the whole truth, at
-his generous expense, I came finally to room with Joe. Somebody
-should utilize the bed. Being young and sound of nerves, his restless
-night-roamings about the floors disturbed not me; I slept serenely
-through as I doubtless would through the crack of doom had such calamity
-surprised us at that time, and Joe and I prospered bravely in company.
-
-Beseech and plead as I might, however, Joe would not impart to me that
-hidden casino strength beyond his word that no fraud was practiced--a
-fact whereof my watchings had made me sure--and curtly describing it as
-an ability to “Tell the last four.”
-
-While Joe housed me as his guest for many months and paid the bills, one
-is not to argue therefrom any unhappy pauperism on my boyish part. In
-good sooth! I was more than rich during those days, with a fortune of
-anywhere from five hundred to as many as four thousand dollars. Like all
-disciples of chance I had these riches ever ready in my pocket for what
-prey might offer.
-
-It was now and then well for Joe that I went thus provided. That badly
-garbed squire of good dame Fortune, who failed not of a profit at
-casino, had withal an overpowering taste to play faro; and as if by some
-law of compensation and to preserve an equilibrium, he would seem to sit
-down to a faro layout only to lose.
-
-Time and again he came to his rooms stripped of the last dollar. On
-these harrowing occasions Joe would borrow a round-number stake from me
-and so return to the legitimate sure harvests of casino, vowing never to
-lose himself and his money in any quicksands of farobank again.
-
-It must be admitted that these anti-faro vows were never kept; once firm
-on his feet by virtue of casino renewed, it was not over long ere he
-“tried it just once more,” to lose again. These faro bankruptcies would
-overtake Joe about once a month.
-
-One day I made a mild plot; I had foregone all hope of coaxing Joe’s
-secret from him; now I resolved to bring against him the pressure of a
-small intrigue. I lay in ambush for Joe, waylaid him as it were in the
-weak hour of his destitution and ravished from him at the point of his
-necessities that which I could come by in no other way.
-
-It was following a disastrous night at faro when Joe appeared without
-so much silver in his pockets as might serve to keep the fiends from
-dancing there. Having related his losses he asked for the usual five
-hundred wherewith to re-enter the sure lists of casino and begin the
-combat anew.
-
-To his sore amazement and chagrin--and somewhat to his alarm, for at
-first he thought me as poor as himself from my refusal--I shook my sage
-young head.
-
-“Haven’t you got it?” asked Joe anxiously.
-
-“Oh, yes,” I replied, “I’ve got it; and it’s yours on one condition.
-Teach me how to ‘Tell the last four,’ and you may have five hundred and
-five hundred with it.”
-
-Then I pointed out to Joe his mean unfairness in not equipping me with
-this resistless knowledge. Save for that one pregnant secret I was
-as perfect at casino as any sharper on the Bowery. Likewise, were the
-situation reversed, I’d be quick to instruct him. I’d lend no more;
-there would come no further five hundred save as the price of that
-touchstone--the golden secret of how to “Tell the last four.” This I set
-forth jealously.
-
-“Why, then,” said Joe, “I’ll do my best to teach you. But it will cost
-a deal of work. You’ll have to put in hours of practice and curry and
-groom and train your memory as if it were a horse for a great race. I
-tell you the more readily--for I could elsewhere easily get the five
-hundred and for that matter five thousand other dollars to keep it
-company--since I believe I’ve not many months to live at best”--here, as
-if in confirmation, a gust of coughing shook him--“and this secret shall
-be your legacy.”
-
-With these words, Joe got a deck of cards and began a game of casino
-with me as an adversary. Slowly playing the cards, he explained and
-strove to illustrate those mental methods by which he kept account and
-tabbed them as they were played. If I could lay bare this system here
-I would; but its very elaboration forbids. It was as though Joe owned a
-blackboard in his head with the fifty-two cards told off by numbers in
-column, and from which he erased a card the moment it appeared in play.
-By processes of elimination, he came finally to “Tell the last four,”
- and as the last hands were dealt knew those held by his opposite as
-much as ever he knew his own. This advantage, with even luck and perfect
-skill made him not to be conquered.
-
-It took many sittings with many lessons many hours long; but in time
-because of my young faculties--not too much cumbered of those thousand
-and one concerns to come with years and clamor for remembrance--I grew
-as perfect as Joe.
-
-And it was well I learned the secret when I did. Soon after, I became
-separated from Joe; I went southward to New Orleans and when I was next
-to New York Joe had disappeared. Nor could I find trace or sign of
-his whereabouts. He went in truth to his old village, and my earliest
-information thereof came only when the tavern host told the origin
-of the club-swinging ballet dancer then toeing it so gallantly on his
-gables.
-
-But while I parted with my friend, I never forgot him. The knowledge he
-gave double-armed me at the game. It became the reason of often riches
-in my hands, and was ever a resort when I erred over horse races or was
-beaten down by some storm of faro. Then it was profitably I recalled
-Casino Joe and his instructions; and his invincible secret of “How to
-tell the last four.”
-
-“Is it not strange,” said the Jolly Doctor, when the Red Nosed Gentleman
-had finished, “that I who never cared to gamble, should listen with
-delight to a story of gamblers and gambling? But so it is; I’ve heard
-scores such in my time and always with utmost zest. I’ll even tell one
-myself--as it was told me--when it again becomes my duty to furnish this
-good company entertainment. Meanwhile, unless my memory fails, it should
-be the task of our descendant of Hiawatha”--here the Jolly Doctor turned
-smilingly to Sioux Sam--“to take up the burden of the evening.”
-
-The Old Cattleman, joining with the Jolly Doctor in the suggestion,
-and Sioux Sam being in no wise loth to be heard, our half-savage friend
-related “How Moh-Kwa Fed the Catfish.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XV.--HOW MOH-KWA FED THE CATFISH.
-
-One day Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, had a quarrel with Ish-koo-dah, the
-Fire. Moh-Kwa was gone from home two days, for Moh-Kwa had found a large
-patch of ripe blackberries, an’ he said it was prudent to stay an’ eat
-them all up lest some other man find them. So Moh-Kwa stayed; an’ though
-he ate very hard the whole time an’ never slept, so many an’ fat were
-the blackberries, it took two suns to eat them.
-
-When Moh-Kwa came into his cavern, he found Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, grown
-small an’ hot an’ angry, for he had not been fed for two days. Moh-Kwa
-gave the Fire a bundle of dry wood to eat, an’ when the Fire’s stomach
-was full an’ he had grown big an’ bright with plenty, he sat up on his
-bed of coals an’ found fault with Moh-Kwa for his neglect.
-
-“An’ should you neglect me again for two days,” said the Fire, “I will
-know I am not wanted an’ shall go away.”
-
-Moh-Kwa was much tired with no sleep, so he answered Ish-koo-dah, the
-Fire, sharply.
-
-“You are always hungry,” said Moh-Kwa; “also you are hard to suit. If I
-give you green wood, you will not eat it; if the wood be wet, you turn
-away. Nothing but old dry wood will you accept. Beggars like you should
-not own such fine tastes. An’ do you think, Fire, that I who have much
-to do an’ say an’ many places to go--I, Moh-Kwa, who am as busy as the
-bees in the Moon of Blossoms, have time to stay ever by your side
-to pass you new dry wood to eat? Go to; you are more trouble that a
-papoose!”
-
-Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, did not say anything to this, for the Fire’s
-feelings were hurt; an’ Moh-Kwa who was heavy with his labors over the
-blackberries lay down an’ took a big sleep.
-
-When Moh-Kwa awoke, he sat blinking in the darkness of his cavern, for
-Ish-koo-dah, while Moh-Kwa slept, had gone out an’ left night behind.
-
-For five days Moh-Kwa had no fire an’ it gave him a bad heart; for while
-Moh-Kwa could eat his food raw an’ never cared for that, he could not
-smoke his kinnikinick unless Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, was there to light
-his pipe for him.
-
-For five days Moh-Kwa smoked no kinnikinick; an’ Moh-Kwa got angry
-because of it an’ roared an’ shouted up an’ down the canyons, an’ to
-show he did not care, Moh-Kwa smashed his redstone pipe on a rock. But
-in his stomach Moh-Kwa cared, an’ would have traded Ish-koodah, the
-Fire, four armsful of dry cedar just to have him light his kinnikinick
-but once. But Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, was gone out an’ would not come
-back.
-
-[Illustration: 0239]
-
-Openhand, the good Sioux an’ great hunter, heard Moh-Kwa roaring for his
-kinnikinick. An’ Openhand told him he behaved badly, like a young squaw
-who wants new feathers an’ cannot get them. Then Openhand gave Moh-Kwa
-another pine, an’ brought the Fire from his own lodge; an’ again
-Moh-Kwa’s cavern blazed with Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, in the middle of the
-floor, an’ Moh-Kwa smoked his kinnikinick. An’ Moh-Kwa’s heart felt good
-an’ soft an’ pleasant like the sunset in the Moon of Fruit. Also, he
-gave Ish-koo-dah plenty of wood to eat an’ never scolded him for being
-always hungry.
-
-All the Sioux loved Openhand; for no one went by his lodge empty but
-Openhand gave him a piece of buffalo meat; an’ if a Sioux was cold, he
-put a blanket about his shoulders. An’ for this he was named “Openhand,”
- an’ the Sioux were never tired of talking good talk of Open-hand, an’
-the noise of his praises never died out.
-
-Coldheart hated Openhand because he was so much loved. Coldheart was
-himself sulky an’ hard, an’ his hand was shut tight like a beaver-trap
-that is sprung, an’ it would not open to give anything away. Those who
-came hungry went hungry for all of Coldheart; an’ if they were cold,
-they were cold. Coldheart wrapped his robes the closer, an’ was the
-warmest whenever he thought the frost-wolf was gnawing others.
-
-“I do not rule the ice,” said Coldheart; “hunger does not come or go
-on its war-trail by my orders. An’ if the Sioux freeze or starve, an’
-Pau-guk, the Death, walks among the lodges, it is because the time is
-Pau-guk’s an’ I cannot help it.”
-
-So Coldheart kept his blankets an’ his buffalo meat for himself an’
-his son, the Blackbird, an’ gave nothing away. An’ for these things,
-Coldheart was hated while Openhand was praised; an’ the breast of
-Coldheart was so eaten with his wrath against Openhand that it seemed as
-though Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, had gone into Coldheart’s bosom an’ made a
-camp.
-
-Coldheart would have called Pau-guk to his elbow an’ killed Openhand;
-but Coldheart was not sure. The Openhand moved as quick as a fish in the
-Yellowstone, an’ stood as tall an’ strong as the big pine on the hill;
-there were no three warriors, the bravest of the Sioux, who could have
-gone on the trail of Openhand an’ shown his skelp on their return, for
-Openhand was a mighty fighter an’ had a big heart, so that even Fear
-himself was afraid of Openhand an’ never dared come where he was.
-
-Coldheart knew well that he could not fight with Openhand; for to find
-this out, he made his strongest medicine an’ called Jee-bi, the
-Spirit; an’ Jee-bi talked with Pau-guk, the Death, an’ asked Pau-guk
-if Coldheart went on the trail of Openhand to take his skelp, which one
-Pau-guk would have at the trail’s end. An’ Pau-guk said he would have
-Coldheart, for Openhand would surely kill him. When Jee-bi, the Spirit,
-told Coldheart the word of Pau-guk, Coldheart saw then that he must go a
-new trail with his hate.
-
-Coldheart smoked an’ smoked many pipes; but the thoughts of Openhand
-an’ how he was loved by the Sioux made his kinnikinick bitter. Still
-Coldheart smoked; an’ at last the thought came that if he could not kill
-Openhand, he would kill the Young Wolf, who was Openhand’s son. When
-this thought folded its wings an’ perched in the breast of Coldheart, he
-called for the evil Lynx, who was Coldheart’s friend, an’ since he was
-the wickedest of the Sioux, would do what Coldheart said.
-
-The Lynx came an’ sat with Coldheart in his lodge; an’ the lodge was
-closed tight so that none might listen, an’ because it was cold. The
-Coldheart told the Lynx to go with his war-axe when the next sun was up
-an’ beat out the brains of the Young Wolf.
-
-“An’ when he is dead,” said Coldheart, “you must bring me the Young
-Wolf’s heart to eat. Then I will have my revenge on Openhand, his
-father, whom I hate; an’ whenever I meet the Openhand I will laugh with
-the thought that I have eaten his son’s heart.”
-
-But there was one who listened to Coldheart while he gave his orders
-to the evil Lynx, although she was no Sioux. This was the Widow of the
-Great Rattlesnake of the Rocks who had long before been slain by Yellow
-Face, his brother medicine. The Widow having hunted long an’ hard had
-crawled into the lodge of Cold-heart to warm herself while she rested.
-An’ as she slept beneath a buffalo robe, the noise of Coldheart talking
-to the evil Lynx woke the Widow up; an’ so she sat up under her buffalo
-robe an’ heard every word, for a squaw is always curious an’ would
-sooner hear new talk than find a string of beads.
-
-That night as Moh-Kwa smoked by Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, an’ fed him
-dry sticks so he would not leave him again, the Widow came an’ warmed
-herself by Moh-Kwa’s side. An’ Moh-Kwa asked the Widow how she fared;
-an’ the Widow while hungry said she was well, only that her heart was
-made heavy by the words of Coldheart. Then the Widow told Moh-Kwa what
-Coldheart had asked the evil Lynx to do, an’ how for his revenge against
-Openhand he would eat the Young Wolf’s heart.
-
-Moh-Kwa listened to the Widow with his head on one side, for he would
-not lose a word; an’ when she had done, Moh-Kwa was so pleased that he
-put down his pipe an’ went to a nest which the owls had built on the
-side of the cavern an’ took down a young owl an’ gave it to the Widow to
-eat. An’ the Widow thanked Moh-Kwa an’ swallowed the little owl, while
-the old owl flew all about the cavern telling the other owls what
-Moh-Kwa had done. The owls were angry an’ shouted at Moh-Kwa.
-
-“The Catfish people said you were a Pawnee! But you are worse; you are
-a Shoshone, Moh-Kwa; yes, you are a Siwash! Bird-robber, little
-owl-killer, you an’ your Rattlesnake Widow are both Siwashes!”
-
-But Moh-Kwa paid no heed; he did not like the owls, for they stole his
-meat; an’ when he would sleep, a company of the older owls would get
-together an’ hold a big talk that was like thunder in Moh-Kwa’s cavern
-an’ kept him awake. Moh-Kwa said at last that if the owls called the
-Widow who was his guest a Siwash again, he would give her two more baby
-owls. With that the old owls perched on their points of rocks an’ were
-silent, for they feared Moh-Kwa an’ knew he was not their friend.
-
-When the Widow had eaten her little owl, she curled up to sleep two
-weeks, for such was the Widow’s habit when she had eaten enough. An’ as
-she snored pleasantly, feathers an’ owl-down were blown out through her
-nose, but the young owl was gone forever.
-
-Moh-Kwa left the Widow sleeping an’ went down the canyon in the morning
-to meet the evil Lynx where he knew he would pass close by the bank of
-the Yellowstone. An’ when Moh-Kwa saw the evil Lynx creeping along with
-his war-axe in his hand on the trail of the Young Wolf’s heart, he gave
-a great shout: “Ah! Lynx, I’ve got you!” An’ then he started for the
-Lynx with his paws spread. For Moh-Kwa loved the Open-hand, who brought
-back to him Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, when he had gone out of Moh-Kwa’s
-cavern an’ would not return.
-
-But Moh-Kwa did not reach the Lynx, for up a tree swarmed the Lynx out
-of Moh-Kwa’s reach.
-
-When Moh-Kwa saw the evil Lynx hugging close to the tree, the new
-thought made Moh-Kwa laugh. An’ with that he reached up with his great
-arms an’ began to bend down the tree like a whip. When Moh-Kwa had bent
-the tree enough, he let it go free; an’ the tree sprang straight like
-an osage-orange bow. It was so swift an’ like a whip that the Lynx could
-not hold on, but went whirling out over the river like a wild duck when
-its wing is broken by an arrow; an’ then the Lynx splashed into the
-Yellowstone.
-
-When the Lynx struck splashing into the Yellowstone, all the Catfish
-people rushed for him with the Big Chief of the Catfish at their head.
-Also, Ah-meek, the Beaver, was angry; for Ahmeek was crossing the
-Yellowstone with a bundle of bulrushes in his mouth to help build his
-winter house on the bank, an’ the Lynx struck so near to Ah-meek that
-the waves washed his face an’ whiskers, an’ he was startled an’ lost the
-bulrushes out of his mouth an’ they were washed away.
-
-Ah-meek who was angry, an’ the Catfish people who were hungry, charged
-on the Lynx; but the Lynx was not far enough from the shore for them,
-an’ while the Catfish people pinched him an’ Ah-meek, the Beaver, clawed
-him, the Lynx crawled out on the bank an’ was safe.
-
-But Moh-Ivwa met the Lynx when he crawled out of the Yellowstone looking
-like Dah-hin-dah, the Bull-frog, an’ Moh-Kwa picked him up with his paws
-to throw him back.
-
-But a second new thought came; an’ although the Catfish people screamed
-at him an’ Ah-meek who had lost his bulrushes was black with anger,
-Moh-Kwa did not throw the Lynx back into the river but stood him on his
-feet an’ told him what to do. An’ when Moh-Kwa gave him the orders, the
-Lynx promised to obey.
-
-Moh-Kwa killed a fawn; an’ the Lynx took its heart in his hand an’
-went with it to Coldheart an’ said it was the heart of Young Wolf. An’
-Coldheart roasted it an’ ate it, thinking it was Young Wolf’s heart.
-
-For a day was the Coldheart glad, for he felt strong an’ warm with the
-thought that now he was revenged against Openhand; an’ Coldheart longed
-to tell Openhand that he had eaten his son’s heart. But Coldheart was
-too wise to make this boast; he knew that Openhand whether with knife or
-lance or arrow would give him at once to Pau-guk, an’ that would end his
-revenge.
-
-Still Coldheart thought he would go to Open-hand’s lodge an’ feed his
-eyes an’ ears with Open-hand’s groans an’ mournings when now his son,
-the Young Wolf, was gone. But when Coldheart came to the lodge of
-Openhand, he was made sore to meet the Young Wolf who was starting forth
-to hunt. Coldheart spoke with the Young Wolf to make sure he had been
-cheated; an’ then he went back to kill the Lynx.
-
-But Coldheart was too late; the Lynx had not waited; now he was gone
-with his squaws an’ his ponies an’ his blankets to become a Pawnee. The
-Lynx was tired of being a Sioux.
-
-When the Widow’s sleep was out, Moh-Kwa sent her to hide in the lodge
-of Coldheart to hear what next he would plan. The Widow went gladly,
-for Moh-Kwa promised four more small young owls just out of the egg. The
-Widow lay under the buffalo robe an’ heard the words of Coldheart. In a
-week, she came back to Moh-Kwa an’ told him what Coldheart planned.
-
-Coldheart had sent twenty ponies to the Black-foot chief, Dull Knife,
-where he lived on the banks of the Little Bighorn. Also, Coldheart sent
-these words in the mouth of his runner:
-
-“My son and the son of my enemy will come to your camp in one moon. You
-will marry the Rosebud, your daughter, to my son, while the son of my
-enemy you will tie an’ give to your young men to shoot at with their
-arrows until he be dead, an’ afterward until they have had enough sport.
-My son will bring you a white arrow; the son of my enemy will bring
-you a black arrow.” Moh-Kwa laughed when he heard this from the Widow’s
-lips; an’ because she had been faithful, Moh-Kwa gave her the four small
-owls just from the egg. An’ the older owls took it quietly an’ only
-whispered their anger; for Moh-Kwa said that if they screamed an’
-shouted when now he must sit an’ think until his head ached, he would
-knock down every nest.
-
-When his plan was ripe, Coldheart put on a good face an’ went to the
-lodge of Openhand an’ gave him a red blanket an’ said he was Openhand’s
-friend. An’ Openhand an’ all the Sioux said this must be true talk
-because of the red blanket; for Coldheart was never known to give
-anything away before.
-
-Openhand an’ Coldheart sat down an’ smoked; for Moh-Kwa had never told
-how Coldheart had sent the Lynx for the Young Wolf’s heart. Moh-Kwa
-never told tales; moreover Moh-Kwa had also his own plans as well as
-Coldheart.
-
-When Openhand an’ Coldheart came to part, an’ Coldheart was to go again
-to his own lodge, he asked that Openhand send his son, Young Wolf, with
-the Blackbird who would go to wed the young squaw, Rosebud, where she
-dwelt with Dull Knife, her father, in their camp on the Little Bighorn.
-An’ Openhand did not hesitate, but said, “Yes;” an’ the Young Wolf
-himself was glad to go, like all boys who hope to see new scenes.
-
-As Young Wolf an’ the Blackbird next day rode away, Coldheart stuck a
-black arrow in the cow-skin quiver of Young Wolf, an’ a white arrow in
-that of the Blackbird, saying:
-
-“Give these to the Dull Knife that he may know you are my sons an’ come
-from me, an’ treat you with much love.”
-
-Many days the young men traveled to reach Dull Knife’s camp on the
-Little Bighorn. In the night of their last camp, Moh-Kwa came silently,
-an’ while the young men slept swapped Coldheart’s arrows; an’ when
-they rode to the lodge of Dull Knife, an’ while the scowling Blackfeet
-gathered about--for the sight of a Sioux gives a Blackfoot a hot
-heart--the black arrow was in the quiver of the Blackbird an’ the white
-arrow in that of Young Wolf.
-
-“How!” said the young men to Dull Knife. “How! how!” said Dull Knife.
-“An’ now, my sons, where are the arrows which are your countersigns?”
-
-When the young men took out the arrows they saw that they had been
-changed; but they knew not their message an’ thought no difference would
-come. So they made no talk since that would lose time; an’ Young Wolf
-gave Dull Knife the white arrow while the Blackbird gave him the black
-arrow.
-
-An’ holding an arrow in each hand--one white, one black--Dull Knife
-said:
-
-“For the twenty ponies which we have got, the Blackfeet will carry forth
-the word of Cold-heart; for the Blackfeet keep their treaties, being
-honest men.”
-
-[Illustration: 0251]
-
-An’ so it turns that the Blackbird is shot full of arrows until he
-bristles like the quills on the back of Kagh, the Hedgepig. But Young
-Wolf is taken to the Rosebud, an’ they are married. The Young Wolf would
-have said: “No!” for he did not understand; but Dull Knife showed him
-first a war-axe an’ next the Rosebud. An’ the Rosebud was more beautiful
-in the eye of youth than any war-axe; besides Young Wolf was many days
-march from the lodge of his father, Openhand, an’ marriage is better
-than death. Thinking all of which, the Young Wolf did not say “no” but
-said “yes,” an’ at the wedding there was a great feast, for the Dull
-Knife was a big chief an’ rich.
-
-Ma-ma, the Woodpecker, stood on the top of a dead tree an’ saw the
-wedding; an’ when it was over, he flew straight an’ told Moh-Kwa so that
-Moh-Kwa might know.
-
-When Young Wolf an’ the Rosebud on their return were a day’s ride from
-the Sioux, Moh-Kwa went to the lodge of Coldheart an’ said:
-
-“Come, great plotter, an’ meet your son an’ his new squaw.”
-
-An’ Coldheart came because Moh-Kwa took him by his belts an’ ran with
-him; for Moh-Kwa was so big an’ strong he could run with a pony an’ its
-rider in his mouth.
-
-Moh-Kwa told Coldheart how the Blackbird gave Dull Knife the black arrow
-an’ was shot with all the arrows of five quivers. Coldheart groaned like
-the buffalo when he dies. Then Moh-Kwa showed him where Young Wolf
-came on with the beautiful Rosebud; and that he was followed by twenty
-pack-ponies which carried the presents of Dull Knife for his daughter
-an’ his new son.
-
-“An’ now,” said Moh-Kwa, “you have seen enough; for you have seen that
-you have made your foe happy an’ killed your own son. Also, I have
-cheated the Catfish people twice; once with the Big Medicine Elk an’
-once with the Lynx, both of whom I gave to the Catfish people an’ took
-back. It is true, I have cheated the good Catfish folk who were once my
-friends, an’ now they speak hard of me an’ call me a ‘Pawnee,’ the whole
-length of the Yellowstone from the Missouri to the Falls. However, Moh
-Kwa has something for the Catfish people this time which he will not
-take back, an’ by to-morrow’s sun, the river will ring with Moh-Kwa’s
-praises.”
-
-Moh-Kwa carried Coldheart to the Yellowstone, an’ he sang an’ shouted
-for all the Catfish people to come. Then Moh-Kwa took Coldheart to
-a deep place in the river a long way from the bank. An’ Moh-Kwa held
-Coldheart while the Chief of the Catfish got a strong hold, an’ his
-squaw--who was four times bigger than the Catfish Chief--got also a
-strong hold; an’ then what others of the Catfish people were there took
-their holds. When every catfish was ready Moh-Kwa let Coldheart slip
-from between his paws, an’ with a swish an’ a swirl, the Catfish people
-snatched Coldheart under the water an’ tore him to pieces. For many days
-the Yellowstone was bank-full of good words for Moh-Kwa; an’ all the
-Catfish people said he was a Sioux an’ no cheat of a Pawnee who gives
-only to take back.
-
-That night in his cavern Moh-Kwa sat by Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, an’
-smoked an’ told the Widow the story, an’ how it all began by Openhand
-bringing the Fire back to be his friend when they had quarreled an’ the
-Fire had gone out an’ would not return. An’ while Moh-Kwa told the tale
-to the Widow, not an owl said a word or even whispered, but blinked in
-silence each on his perch; for the Widow seemed lean an’ slim as she lay
-by the fire an’ listened; an’ the owls thought it would be foolish to
-remind Moh-Kwa of their presence.
-
-*****
-
-“Now, do you know,” said the Red Nosed Gentleman, with his head on one
-side as one who would be deemed deeply the critic, “these Indian stories
-are by no means bad.” Then leaning across to the Old Cattleman, he
-asked: “Does our Sioux friend make them up?”
-
-“Them tales,” said the Old Cattleman, lighting a new cigar, “is most
-likely as old as the Yellowstone itse’f. The squaws an’ the old bucks
-tell ’em to the children, an’ so they gets passed along the line.
-Sioux Sam only repeats what he’s done heard from his mother.”
-
-“And now,” remarked the Jolly Doctor, addressing the Sour Gentleman,
-“what say you? How about that story of the Customs concerning which you
-whetted our interest by giving us the name. It is strange, too, that
-while my interest is still as strong as ever, the name itself has clean
-slipped through the fingers of my memory.” At this the Jolly Doctor
-glared about the circle as though in wonder at the phenomenon of an
-interest which remained when the reason of it had faded away.
-
-“I will willingly give you the story,” said the Sour Gentleman. “That
-name you search for is ‘The Emperor’s Cigars.’”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XVI.--THE EMPEROR’S CIGARS.
-
-It is not the blood which flows at the front, my friends, that is the
-worst of war; it is the money corruption that goes on at the rear.
-In old Sparta, theft was not theft unless discovered in process of
-accomplishment, and those larcenous morals taught of Lycurgus would
-seem, on the tails of our own civil war, to have found widest consent
-and adoption throughout every department of government. The public hour
-reeled with rottenness, and you may be very sure the New York Customs
-went as staggeringly corrupt as the rest.
-
-It is to my own proper shame that I should have fallen to have art or
-part or lot in such iniquities. Yet I went into them with open eyes and
-hands, and a heart--hungry as a pike’s--for whatever of spoil chance or
-skilfully constructed opportunity might place within my reach. My sole
-defense, and that now sounds slight and trivial even to my partial ears,
-was the one I advanced the other day; my two-ply hatred of government
-both for injuries done my region of the South as well as the personal
-ruin visited on me when my ill-wishers struck down that enterprise of
-steamed tobacco which was making me rich. That is all I may urge in
-extenuation, and I concede its meager insufficiency.
-
-As I’ve said, I obtained an appointment as an inspector of Customs, and
-afterward worked side by side, and I might add hand and glove, with our
-old friends, Quin and Lorns of the Story of the Smuggled Silks. That
-fearsome honest Chief Inspector who so put my heart to a trot had been
-dismissed--for some ill-timed integrity, I suppose--sharply in the wake
-of that day he frightened me; and when I took up life’s burdens as an
-officer of the Customs, my companions, together with myself, were all
-black sheep together. Was there by any chance an honest man among us, he
-did not mention it, surely; nor did he lapse into act or deed that might
-have been evidence to prove him pure. Yes, forsooth! ignorance could
-be overlooked, drunkenness condoned, indolence reproved; but for that
-officer of our Customs who in those days was found honest, there
-shone no ray of hope. He was seized on and cast into outer unofficial
-darkness, there to exercise his dangerous probity in private life. There
-was no room for such among us; no peace nor safety for the rest while
-he remained. Wherefore, we of a proper blackness, were like so many
-descendants of Diogenes, forever searching among ourselves to find an
-honest man; but with fell purpose when discovered, of his destruction.
-We maintained a strictest quarantine against any infection of truth, and
-I positively believe, with such success, that it was excluded from our
-midst. That honest Chief Inspector was dismissed, I say; Lorns told me
-of it before I’d been actively in place an hour, and the news gave me
-deepest satisfaction.
-
-That gentleman who was official head of the coterie of revenue hunters
-to which I was assigned was peculiarly the man unusual. His true name,
-if I ever heard it, I’ve forgot; among us of the Customs, he was known
-as Betelnut Jack. Lorns took me into his presence and made us known to
-one another early in my revenue career. I had been told stories of this
-man by both Lorns and Quin. They deeply reverenced him for his virtues
-of courage and cunning, and the praises of Betelnut Jack were constant
-in their mouths.
-
-Betelnut Jack was at his home in the Bowery. Jack, in years gone by, had
-been a hardy member of one of those Volunteer fire companies which in
-that hour notably augmented the perils of an urban life. Jack was
-a doughty fighter, and with a speaking trump in one hand and a
-spanner-wrench in the other, had done deeds of daring whereof one might
-still hear the echo. And he became for these strong-hand reasons a tower
-of strength in politics; and obtained that eminence in the Customs which
-was his when first we met.
-
-Betelnut Jack received Lorns and myself in his dingy small coop of a
-parlor. He was unmarried--a popular theory in accounting for this being
-that he’d been crossed in love in his youth. Besides the parlor, Jack’s
-establishment contained only one room, a bedroom it was, a shadow larger
-than the bed.
-
-Betelnut Jack himself was wiry and dark, and with a face which, while
-showing marks of former wars, shone the seat of kindly good-humor.
-
-There had been an actor, Chanfrau, who played “Mose, the Fireman.”
- Betelnut Jack resembled in dress his Bowery brother of the stage. His
-soiled silk hat stood on a dresser. He wore a long skirted coat, a red
-shirt, a belt which upheld--in a manner so absent-minded that one feared
-for the consequences--his trousers; these latter garments in their
-terminations were tucked inside the gaudy tops of calfskin boots; small
-and wrinkleless these, and fitting like a glove, with the yellow seams
-of the soles each day carefully re-yellowed to the end that they be
-admired of men. Betelnut Jack’s dark hair, a shade of gray streaking it
-in places, was crisp and wavy; and a long curl, carefully twisted and
-oiled, was brought down as low as the angle of his jaw just forward of
-each ear.
-
-“Be honest, young man!” said Betelnut Jack, at the close of a lecture
-concerning my duties; “be honest! But if you must take wrong money, take
-enough each time to pay for the loss of your job. Do you see this?” And
-Jack’s hand fell on a large morocco-bound copy of “Josephus” which lay
-on his table. “Well, Lorns will tell you what stories I look for in
-that.”
-
-And Lorns, as we came away, told me. Once a week it was the practice of
-each inspector to split off twenty per cent, of his pillage. He would,
-thus organized, pay a visit to his chief, the worthy Betel-nut Jack. As
-they gossiped, Jack’s ever-ready hospitality would cause him to retire
-for a moment to the bedroom in search of a demijohn of personal whisky.
-While alone in the parlor, the visiting inspector would place his
-contribution between the leaves of “Josephus,” and thereby the
-humiliating, if not dangerous, passage of money from hand to hand was
-missed.
-
-There existed but one further trait of caretaking forethought belonging
-with the worthy Betelnut Jack. It would have come better had others
-of that crooked clique of customs copied Betelnut Jack in this last
-cautious characteristic. Justice is a tortoise, while rascality’s a
-hare; yet justice though shod with lead wins ever the race at last.
-Betelnut Jack knew this; and while getting darkly rich with the others,
-he was always ready for the fall. While his comrades drove fast horses,
-or budded brown-stone fronts, or affected extravagant opera and supper
-afterward with those painted lilies, in whose society they delighted,
-Betelnut Jack clung to his old rude Bowery nest of sticks and straws
-and mud, and lived on without a change his Bowery life. He suffered
-no improvements whether of habit or of habitat, and provoked no
-question-asking by any gilded new prosperities of life.
-
-As fast as Betelnut Jack got money, he bought United States bonds. With
-each new thousand, he got a new bond, and tucked it safely away among
-its fellows. These pledges of government he kept packed in a small
-hand-bag; this stood at his bed’s head, ready for instant flight with
-him. When the downfall did occur, as following sundry years of loot and
-customs pillage was the desperate case, Betelnut Jack with the earliest
-whisper of peril, stepped into his raiment and his calfskin boots, took
-up his satchel of bonds, and with over six hundred thousand dollars of
-those securities--enough to cushion and make pleasantly sure the balance
-of his days--saw the last of the Bowery, and was out of the country and
-into a corner of safety as fast as ship might swim.
-
-But now you grow impatient; you would hear in more of detail concerning
-what went forward behind the curtains of Customs in those later ’60’s.
-For myself, I may tell of no great personal exploits. I did not remain
-long in revenue service; fear, rather than honesty, forced me to resign;
-and throughout that brief period of my office holding, youth and a lack
-of talent for practical iniquity prevented my main employment in those
-swart transactions which from time to time took place. I was liked, I
-was trusted; I knew what went forward and in the end I had my share of
-the ill profits; but the plans and, usually, the work came from others
-of a more subtile and experienced venality.
-
-In this affair of The Emperor’s Cigars, the story was this. I call
-them The Emperor’s Cigars because they were of a sort and quality made
-particularly for the then Imperial ruler of the French. They sold at
-retail for one dollar each, were worth, wholesale, seventy dollars a
-hundred, and our aggregate harvest of this one operation was, as I now
-remember, full sixty thousand dollars.
-
-My first knowledge was when Lorns told me one evening of the seizure--by
-whom of our circle, and on what ship, I’ve now forgotten--of one hundred
-thousand cigars. They were in proper boxes, concealed I never knew how,
-and captured in the very act of being smuggled and just as they came
-onto our wharf. In designating the seizure, and for reasons which I’ve
-given before, they were at once dubbed and ever afterwards known among
-us as The Emperor’s Cigars.
-
-These one hundred thousand cigars were taken to the Customs Depot of
-confiscated goods. The owners, as was our rule, were frightened with
-black pictures of coming prison, and then liberated, never to be seen
-of us again. They were glad enough to win freedom without looking once
-behind to see what became of their captured property.
-
-It was one week later when a member of our ring, from poorest tobacco
-and by twenty different makers, caused one hundred thousand cigars,
-duplicates in size and appearance of those Emperor’s Cigars, to be
-manufactured. These cost two and one-half cents each; a conscious
-difference, truly! between that and those seventy cents, the wholesale
-price of our spoil. Well, The Emperor’s Cigars were removed from their
-boxes and their aristocratic places filled by the worthless imitations
-we had provided. Then the boxes were again securely closed; and to look
-at them no one would suspect the important changes which had taken place
-within.
-
-The Emperor’s Cigars once out of their two thousand boxes were carefully
-repacked in certain zinc-lined barrels, and reshipped as “notions” to
-Havana to one of our folk who went ahead of the consignment to receive
-them. In due course, and in two thousand proper new boxes they again
-appeared in the port of New York; this time they paid their honest duty.
-Also, they had a proper consignment, came to no interrupting griefs; and
-being quickly disposed of, wrought out for us that sixty thousand dollar
-betterment of which I’ve spoken.
-
-As corollary of this particular informality of The Emperor’s Cigars,
-there occurred an incident which while grievous to the victims, made no
-little fun for us; its relation here may entertain you, and because of
-its natural connection with the main story, will come properly enough.
-At set intervals, the government held an auction of all confiscated
-goods. At these markets to which the public was invited to appear and
-bid, the government asserted nothing, guaranteed nothing. In disposing
-of such gear as these cigars, no box was opened; no goods displayed.
-One saw nothing but the cover, heard nothing but the surmise of an
-auctioneer, and thereupon, if impulse urged, bid what he pleased for a
-pig in a poke.
-
-Thus it came to pass that on the occasion when The Emperor’s Cigars
-were held aloft for bids, the garrulous lecturer employed in selling the
-collected plunder of three confiscation months, took up one of the two
-thousand boxes as a sample, and said:
-
-“I offer for sale a lot of two thousand packages, of which the one I
-hold in my hand is a specimen. Each package is supposed to contain fifty
-cigars. What am I bid for the lot? What offer do I hear?”
-
-That was the complete proffer as made by the government; for all that
-the bidding was briskly sharp. Those who had come to purchase were there
-for bargains not guarantees; moreover, there was the box; and could they
-not believe their experience? Each would-be bidder knew by the size
-and shape and character of the package that it was made for and should
-contain fifty cigars of the Emperor brand. Wherefore no one distrusted;
-the question of contents arose to no mind; and competition grew instant
-and close. Bid followed bid; five hundred dollars being the mark of
-each advance, as the noisy struggle between speculators for the lot’s
-ownership proceeded.
-
-At last those celebrated marketeers, Grove and Filtord, received the
-lot--one hundred thousand of The Emperor’s Cigars--for forty-five
-thousand dollars. What thoughts may have come to them later, when they
-searched their bargain for its merits, I cannot say. Not one word of
-inquiry, condemnation or complaint came from Grove and Filtord. Whatever
-their discoveries, or whatever their deductions, they maintained a
-profound taciturnity. Probably they did not care to court the laughter
-of fellow dealers by disclosures of the trap into which they had so
-blindly bid their way. Surely, they must in its last chapters have been
-aware of the swindle! To have believed in the genuineness of the goods
-would have dissipated what remnant of good repute might still have clung
-to that last of the Napoleons who was their inventor, and justified the
-coming destruction of his throne and the birth of the republic which
-arose from its ruins. As I say, however, not one syllable of complaint
-came floating back from Grove and Filtord. They took their loss, and
-were dumb.
-
-My own pocket was joyfully gorged with much fat advantage of this
-iniquity--for inside we were like whalers, each having a prearranged per
-cent, of what oil was made, no one working for himself alone--long prior
-to that bidding which so smote on Grove and Filtord. The ring had no
-money interest in the confiscation sales; those proceeds went all to
-government. We divided the profits of our own disposal of the right true
-Emperor’s Cigars on the occasion of their second appearance in port; and
-that business was ended and over and division done sundry weeks prior to
-the Grove and Filtord disaster.
-
-That is the story of The Emperor’s Cigars; there came still one little
-incident, however, which was doubtless the seed of those apprehensions
-which soon drove me to quit the Customs. I had carried his double tithes
-to Betelnut Jack. This was no more the work of policy than right. The
-substitution of the bogus wares, the reshipment to Cuba of The Emperor’s
-Cigars, even the zinc-lined barrels, the repackage and second appearance
-and sale of our prizes, were one and all by direction of Betelnut Jack.
-He planned the campaign in each least particular. To him was the credit;
-and to him came the lion’s share, as, in good sooth! it should if there
-be a shadow of that honor among rogues whereof the proverb tells.
-
-On the evening when I sought Betelnut Jack, we sat and chatted briefly
-of work at the wharfs. Not one word, mind you! escaped from either that
-might intimate aught of customs immorality. That would have been a gross
-breach of the etiquette understood by our flock of customs cormorants.
-No; Betelnut Jack and I confined discussion to transactions absolutely
-white; no other was so much as hinted at.
-
-Then came Betelnut Jack’s proposal of his special Willow Run; he retired
-in quest of the demijohn; this was my cue to enrich “Josephus,” ready on
-the dwarf center table to receive the goods. My present to Betelnut Jack
-was five one-hundred-dol-lar bills.
-
-Somewhat in haste, I took these from my pocket and opened “Josephus” to
-lay them between the pages. Any place would do; Betelnut Jack would
-know how to discover the rich bookmark. As I parted the book, my eye
-was arrested by a sentence. As I’ve asserted heretofore, I’m not
-superstitious; yet that casual sentence seemed alive and to spring upon
-me from out “Josephus” as a threat:
-
-“And these men being thieves were destroyed by the King’s laws; and
-their people rended their garments, put on sackcloth, and throwing ashes
-on their heads went about the streets, crying out.”
-
-That is what it said; and somehow it made my heart beat quick and little
-like a linnet’s heart. I put in my contribution and closed the book. But
-the words clung to me like ivy; I couldn’t free myself. In the end, they
-haunted me to my resignation; and while I remained long enough to
-share in the affair of the German Girl’s Diamonds, and in that of the
-Filibusterer, when the hand of discovery fell upon Lorns and Quin, and
-others of my one-time comrades, I was far away, facing innocent, if
-sometimes dangerous, problems on our western plains.
-
-“With a profound respect for you,” observed the Jolly Doctor to the
-Sour Gentleman when that raconteur had ended, “and disavowing a least
-imputation personal to yourself, I must still say that I am amazed by
-the corruption which your tale discloses of things beyond our Customs
-doors. To be sure, you speak of years ago; and yet you leave one to
-wonder if the present be wholly free from taint.”
-
-“It will be remarkable,” returned the Sour Gentleman, “when any arm of
-government is exerted with entire integrity and no purpose save public
-good, and every thought of private gain eliminated. The world never
-has been so virtuous, nor is it like to become so in your time or mine.
-Government and those offices which, like the works of a watch, are made
-to constitute it, are the production of politics, and politics, mind
-you, is nothing save the collected and harmonised selfishness of men.
-The fruit is seldom better than the tree, and when a source is foul the
-stream will wear a stain.” Here the Sour Gentleman sighed as though over
-the baseness of the human race.
-
-“While there’s to be no doubt,” broke in the Red Nosed Gentleman,
-“concerning the corruption existing in politics and the offices and
-office holders bred therefrom, I am free to say that I’ve encountered
-as much blackness, and for myself I have been swindled oftener among
-merchants plying their reputable commerce of private scales and counters
-as in the administration of public affairs.”
-
-The Red Nosed Gentleman here looked about with a challenging eye as one
-who would note if his observation is to meet with contradiction. Finding
-none, he relapsed into silence and burgundy.
-
-“Speakin’ of politics,” said the Old Cattleman, who had listened to the
-others as though he found their discourse instructive, “it’s the one
-thing I’ve seen mighty little of. The only occasion on which I finds
-myse’f immersed in politics is doorin’ the brief sojourn I makes in
-Missouri, an’ when in common with all right-thinkin’ gents, I whirls in
-for Old Stewart.”
-
-“Would you mind,” remarked the Jolly Doctor in a manner so amiable it
-left one no power to resist, “would you mind giving us a glimpse of that
-memorable campaign in which you bore doubtless no inconsiderable part?
-We should have time for it, before we retire.”
-
-“Which the part I bears,” responded the Old Cattleman, “wouldn’t amount
-to the snappin’ of a cap. As to tellin’ you-all concernin’ said outburst
-of pop’lar enthoosiasm for Old Stewart, I’m plumb willin’ to go as far
-as you likes.” Drawing his chair a bit closer to the fire and seeing to
-it that a glass of Scotch was within the radius of his reach, the Old
-Cattleman began.
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XVII.--THE GREAT STEWART CAMPAIGN.
-
-As I states, I saveys nothin’ personal of politics. Thar’s mighty
-little politics gets brooited about Wolfville, an’ I ain’t none shore
-but it’s as well. The camp’s most likely a heap peacefuller as a
-com-moonity. Shore, Colonel Sterett discusses politics in that Coyote
-paper he conducts; but none of it’s nearer than Washin’ton, an’ it all
-seems so plumb dreamy an’ far away that while it’s interestin’, it can’t
-be regyarded as replete of the harrowin’ excitement that sedooces a
-public from its nacheral rest an’ causes it to set up nights an’ howl.
-
-Rummagin’ my mem’ry, I never does hear any politics talked local but
-once, an’ that’s by Dan Boggs. It’s when the Colonel asks Dan to what
-party he adheres in principle--for thar ain’t no real shore-enough
-party lurkin’ about in Arizona much, it bein’ a territory that a-way
-an’ mighty busy over enterprises more calc’lated to pay--an’ Dan retorts
-that he’s hooked up with no outfit none as yet, but stands ready as far
-as his sentiments is involved to go buttin’ into the first organization
-that’ll cheapen nose-paint, ’liminate splits as a resk in faro-bank,
-an’ raise the price of beef. Further than them tenets, Dan allows he
-ain’t got no principles.
-
-Man an’ boy I never witnesses any surplus of politics an’ party strife.
-In Tennessee when I’m a child every decent gent has been brought up a
-Andy Jackson man, an’ so continyoos long after that heroic captain is
-petered. As you-all can imagine, politics onder sech conditions goes
-all one way like the currents of the Cumberland. Thar’s no bicker, no
-strife, simply a vast Andy Jackson yooniformity.
-
-The few years I puts in about Arkansaw ain’t much different. Leastwise
-we-all don’t have issues; an’ what contests does arise is gen’rally
-personal an’ of the kind where two gents enjoys a j’int debate with
-their bowies or shows each other how wrong they be with a gun. An’ while
-politics of the variety I deescribes is thrillin’, your caution rather
-than your intellects gets appealed to, while feuds is more apt to be
-their frootes than any draw-in’ of reg’lar party lines. Wherefore I
-may say it’s only doorin’ the one year I abides in Missouri when I
-experiences troo politics played with issues, candidates, mass-meetin’s
-an’ barbecues.
-
-For myse’f, my part is not spectacyoolar, bein’ I’m new an’ raw an’
-young; but I looks on with relish, an’ while I don’t cut no hercoolean
-figger in the riot, I shore saveys as much about what’s goin’ on as the
-best posted gent between the Ozarks an’ the Iowa line.
-
-What you-all might consider as the better element is painted up to beat
-Old Stewart who’s out sloshin’ about demandin’ re-election to Jeff City
-for a second term. The better element says Old Stewart drinks. An’ this
-accoosation is doubtless troo a whole lot, for I’m witness myse’f to the
-following colloquy which takes place between Old Stewart an’ a jack-laig
-doctor he crosses up with in St. Joe. Old Stewart’s jest come forth from
-the tavern, an’ bein’ on a joobilee the evenin’ before, is lookin’ an’
-mighty likely feelin’ some seedy.
-
-“Doc,” says Old Stewart, openin’ his mouth as wide as a young raven, an’
-then shettin’ it ag’in so’s to continyoo his remarks, “Doc, I wish you’d
-peer into this funnel of mine.”
-
-Then he opens his mouth ag’in in the same egree-gious way, while the
-scientist addressed scouts about tharin with his eyes, plenty owley. At
-last the Doc shows symptoms of bein’ ready to report.
-
-“Which I don’t note nothin’ onusual, Gov’nor, about that mouth,” says
-the Doc, “except it’s a heap voloominous.”
-
-“Don’t you discern no signs or signal smokes of any foreign bodies?”
- says Old Stewart, a bit pettish, same as if he can’t onderstand sech
-blindness.
-
-“None whatever!” observes the Doc.
-
-“It’s shore strange,” retorts Old Stewart, still in his complainin’
-tones; “thar’s two hundred niggers, a brick house an’ a thousand acres
-of bottom land gone down that throat, an’ I sort o’ reckons some traces
-of ’em would show.”
-
-That’s the trouble with Old Stewart from the immacyoolate standpint of
-the better classes; they says he overdrinks. But while it’s convincin’
-to sooperior folks an’ ones who’s goin’ to church an’ makin’ a speshulty
-of it, it don’t sep’rate Old Stewart from the warm affections of the
-rooder masses--the catfish an’ quinine aristocracy that dwells along the
-Missouri; they’re out for him to the last sport.
-
-“Suppose the old Gov’nor does drink,” says one, “what difference does
-that make? Now, if he’s goin’ to try sootes in co’t, or assoome the
-pressure as a preacher, thar’d be something in the bluff. But it don’t
-cut no figger whether a gov’nor is sober or no. All he has to do is
-pardon convicts an’ make notaries public, an’ no gent can absorb licker
-s’fficient to incapac’tate him for sech trivial dooties.”
-
-One of the argyments they uses ag’in Old Stewart is about a hawg-thief
-he pardons. Old Stewart is headin’ up for the state house one mornin’,
-when he caroms on a passel of felons in striped clothes who’s pesterin’
-about the grounds, tittivatin’ up the scenery. Old Stewart pauses in
-front of one of ’em.
-
-“What be you-all in the pen’tentiary for?” says Old Stewart, an’ he’s
-profoundly solemn.
-
-Tharupon the felon trails out on a yarn about how he’s a innocent an’
-oppressed person. He’s that honest an’ upright--hear him relate the
-tale--that you’d feel like apol’gizin’. Old Stewart listens to this
-victim of intrigues an’ outrages ontil he’s through; then he goes
-romancin’ along to the next. Thar’s five wronged gents in that striped
-outfit, five who’s as free from moral taint or stain of crime as Dave
-Tutt’s infant son, Enright Peets Tutt.
-
-But the sixth is different. He admits he’s a miscreant an’ has done
-stole a hawg.
-
-“However did you steal it, you scoundrel?” demands Old Stewart.
-
-“I’m outer meat,” says the crim’nal, “an’ a band of pigs comes pi
-rootin’ about, an’ I nacherally takes my rifle an’ downs one.”
-
-“Was it a valyooable hawg?”
-
-“You-all can gamble it ain’t no runt,” retorts the crim’nal. “I shore
-ain’t pickin’ out the worst, an’ I’m as good a jedge of hawgs as ever
-eats corn pone an’ cracklin’.”
-
-At this Old Stewart falls into a foamin’ rage an’ turns on the two
-gyards who’s soopervisin’ the captives.
-
-“Whatever do you-all mean,” he roars, “bringin’ this common an’
-confessed hawg-thief out yere with these five honest men? Don’t you know
-he’ll corrupt ’em?”
-
-Tharupon Old Stewart reepairs to his rooms in the state house an’
-pardons the hawg convict with the utmost fury.
-
-“An’ now, pull your freight,” says Old Stewart, to the crim’nal. “If
-you’re in Jeff City twenty-four hours from now I’ll have you shot at
-sunrise. The idee of compellin’ five spotless gents to con-tinyoo in
-daily companionship with a low hawg-thief! I pardons you, not because
-you merits mercy, but to preserve the morals of our prison.”
-
-The better element concloods they’ll take advantage of Old Stewart’s
-willin’ness for rum an’ make a example of him before the multitoode.
-They decides they’ll construct the example at a monstrous meetin’ that’s
-schedyooled for Hannibal, where Old Stewart an’ his opponent--who stands
-for the better element mighty excellent, seein’ he’s worth about a
-million dollars with a home-camp in St. Looey, an’ never a idee above
-dollars an’ cents--is programmed for one of these yere j’int debates,
-frequent in the politics of that era. The conspiracy is the more
-necessary as Old Stewart, mental, is so much swifter than the better
-element’s candidate, that he goes by him like a antelope. Only two
-days prior at the town of Fulton, Old Stewart comes after the better
-element’s candidate an’ gets enough of his hide, oratorical, to make a
-saddle-cover. The better element, alarmed for their gent, resolves
-on measures in Hannibal that’s calc’lated to redooce Old Stewart to
-a shorething. They don’t aim to allow him to wallop their gent at the
-Hannibal meetin’ like he does in old Callaway. With that, they confides
-to a trio of Hannibal’s sturdiest sots--all of ’em acquaintances an’
-pards of Old Stewart--the sacred task of gettin’ that statesman too
-drunk to orate.
-
-This yere Hannibal barbecue, whereat Old Stewart’s goin’ to hold a
-open-air discussion with his aristocratic opponent, is set down for
-one in the afternoon. The three who’s to throw Old Stewart with copious
-libations of strong drink, hunts that earnest person out as early as
-sun-up at the tavern. They invites him into the bar-room an’ bids the
-bar-keep set forth his nourishment.
-
-Gents, it works like a charm! All the mornin’, Old Stewart swings an’
-rattles with the plotters an’ goes drink for drink with ’em, holdin’
-nothin’ back.
-
-For all that the plot falls down. When it’s come the hour for Old
-Stewart to resort to the barbecue an’ assoome his share in the
-exercises, two of the Hannibal delegation is spread out cold an’
-he’pless in a r’ar room, while Old Stewart is he’pin’ the third--a gent
-of whom he’s partic’lar fond--upstairs to Old Stewart’s room, where he
-lays him safe an’ serene on the blankets. Then Old Stewart takes another
-drink by himse’f, an’ j’ins his brave adherents at the picnic grounds.
-Old Stewart is never more loocid, an’ ag’in he peels the pelt from the
-better element’s candidate, an’ does it with graceful ease.
-
-Old Stewart, however, is regyarded as in peril of defeat. He’s mighty
-weak in the big towns where the better element is entrenched, an’
-churches grow as thick as blackberries. Even throughout the rooral
-regions, wherever a meetin’ house pokes up its spire, it’s onderstood
-that Old Stewart’s in a heap of danger.
-
-It ain’t that Old Stewart is sech a apostle of nose-paint neither; it
-ain’t whiskey that’s goin’ to kill him off at the ballot box. It’s the
-fact that the better element’s candidate--besides bein’ rich, which is
-allers a mark of virchoo to a troo believer--is a church member, an’
-belongs to a congregation where he passes the plate, an’ stands high up
-in the papers. This makes the better element’s gent a heap pop’lar with
-church folk, while pore Old Stewart, who’s a hopeless sinner, don’t
-stand no show.
-
-This grows so manifest that even Old Stewart’s most locoed supporters
-concedes that he’s gone; an’ money is offered at three to one that the
-better element’s entry will go over Old Stewart like a Joone rise over a
-tow-head. Old Stewart hears these yere misgivin’s an’ bids his folks be
-of good cheer.
-
-“I’ll fix that,” says Old Stewart. “By election day, my learned opponent
-will be in sech disrepoote with every church in Missouri he won’t be
-able to get dost enough to one of ’em to give it a ripe peach.” Old
-Stewart onpouches a roll which musters fifteen hundred dollars. “That’s
-mighty little; but it’ll do the trick.”
-
-Old Stewart’s folks is mystified; they can’t make out how he’s goin’ to
-round up the congregations with so slim a workin’ cap’tal. But they has
-faith in their chief; an’ his word goes for all they’ve got. When he
-lets on he’ll have the churches arrayed ag’inst the foe, his warriors
-takes heart of grace an’ jumps into the collar an’ pulls like lions
-refreshed.
-
-It’s the fourth Sunday before election when Old Stewart, by speshul an’
-trusted friends presents five hundred dollars each to a church in St.
-Looey, an’ another in St. Joe, an’ still another in Hannibal; said gifts
-bein’ in the name an’ with the compliments of his opponent an’ that
-gent’s best wishes for the Christian cause.
-
-Thar’s not a doubt raised; each church believes it-se’f favored
-five hundred dollars’ worth from the kindly hand of the millionaire
-candidate, an’ the three pastors sits pleasantly down an’ writes
-that amazed sport a letter of thanks for his moonificence. He don’t
-onderstand it none; but he decides it’s wise to accept this accidental
-pop’larity, an’ he waxes guileful an’ writes back an’ says that while he
-don’t clearly onderstand, an’ no thanks is his doo, he’s tickled to hear
-he’s well bethought of by the good Christians of St. Looey, St. Joe an’
-Hannibal, as expressed in them missives. The better element’s candidate
-congratulates himse’f on his good luck, stands pat, an’ accepts his
-onexpected wreaths. That’s jest what Old Stewart, who is as cunnin’ as a
-fox, is aimin’ at.
-
-In two days the renown of them five-hundred-dollar gifts goes over the
-state like a cat over a back roof. In four days every church in the
-state hears of these largesses. An’ bein’ plumb alert financial, as
-churches ever is, each sacred outfit writes on to the better element’s
-candidate an’ desires five hundred dollars of that onfortunate
-publicist. He gets sixty thousand letters in one week an’ each calls for
-five hundred.
-
-Gents, thar’s no more to be said; the better element’s candidate is up
-ag’inst it. He can’t yield to the fiscal demands, an’ it’s too late to
-deny the gifts. Whereupon the other churches resents the favoritism
-he’s displayed about the three in St. Looey, St. Joe an’ Hannibal.
-They regyards him as a hoss-thief for not rememberin’ them while his
-weaselskin is in his hand, an’ on election day they comes down on him
-like a pan of milk from a top shelf! You hear me, they shorely blots
-that onhap-py candidate off the face of the earth, an’ Old Stewart is
-Gov’nor ag’in.
-
-On the fourth evening of our companionship about the tavern fire, it was
-the Red Nosed Gentleman who took the lead with a story.
-
-“You spoke,” said the Red Nosed Gentleman, addressing the Jolly Doctor,
-“of having been told by a friend a story you gave us. Not long ago I was
-in the audience while an old actor recounted how he once went to the aid
-of an individual named Connelly. It was not a bad story, I thought; and
-if you like, I’ll tell it to-night. The gray Thespian called his
-adventure The Rescue of Connelly, and these were his words as he related
-it. We were about a table in Browne’s chop house when he told it.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XVIII.--THE RESCUE OF CONNELLY.
-
-Equipped as we are for the conquest of comfort with fresh pipes,
-full mugs, and the flavor of a best of suppers still extant within our
-mouths, it may be an impertinence for one to moralize. And yet, as I go
-forward to this incident, I will premise that, in every least exigency
-of life, ill begets ill, while good springs from good and follows the
-doer with a profit. Such has been my belief; such, indeed, has been my
-unbroken experience; and the misfortunes of Connelly, and my relief of
-them, small matters in themselves, are in proof of what I say.
-
-At sixty I look back with envy on that decade which followed my issuing
-forth from Trinity College, when, hopeless, careless, purposeless beyond
-the moment, I wandered the face of the earth and fed or starved at the
-hands of chance-born opportunity. I was up or down or rich or poor, and,
-with an existence which ran from wine to ditch water and back again
-to wine, was happy. I recall how in those days of checkered fortune,
-wherein there came a proportion of one hour of shadow to one moment of
-sun, I was wont to think on riches and their possession. I would say to
-myself: “And should it so befall that I make my millions, I’ll have
-none about me but broken folk: I’ll refuse to so much as permit the
-acquaintance of a rich man.” I’ve been ever deeply controlled by the
-sentiment therein expressed. Sure it is, I’ve been incapable of the
-example of the Levite, and could never keep to the other side of the way
-when distress appealed.
-
-My youth was wild, and staid folk called it “vicious.” I squandered my
-fortune; melted it, as August melteth ice, while still at Trinity. It
-was my misfortune to reach my majority before I reached my graduation,
-and those two college years which ensued after I might legally write
-myself “man” and the wild days that filled them up, brought me to
-face the world with no more shillings than might take me to Australia.
-However, they were gay though graceless times--those college years; and
-Dublin, from Smock Alley to Sackville Street, may still remember them.
-
-Those ten years after quitting Dublin were years of hit or miss. I did
-everything but preach or steal. Yes, I even fought three prize-fights;
-and there were warped, distorted moments when, bloody but victorious, I
-believed it better to be a fighter than to be a bishop.
-
-But for the main, I drifted to the theaters and lived by the drama.
-Doubtless I was a wretched actor--albeit I felt myself a Kemble--but the
-stage was so far good to me it finally brought me--as an underling of
-much inconsequence--to the fair city of New York. I did but little for
-the drama, but it did much for me; it led me to America. And now that
-I’ve come to New York in this story, I’ve come to Connelly.
-
-Mayhap I had been in New York three weeks. It was a chill night in
-April, and I was going down Broadway and thinking on bed; for, having
-done nothing all day save run about, I was very tired. It was under
-the lamps at the corner of Twenty-ninth Street, that I first beheld
-Connelly. Thin of face as of coat, he stood shivering in the keen air.
-There was something so beaten in the pose of the sorrowful figure that I
-was brought to a full stop.
-
-As strange to the land and its courtesies as I was to Connelly, I
-hesitated for a moment to speak. I was loth to be looked upon as one
-who, from a motive of curiosity, would insult another in bad luck. But I
-took courage from my virtue and at last made bold to accost him:
-
-“Why do you stand shivering here?” I said. “Why don’t you go home?”
-
-“It’s a boarding-house,” said Connelly. “I owe the old lady thirty
-dollars and if I go back she’ll hold me prisoner for it.”
-
-Then he told me his name, and that the trouble with him came from too
-much rum. Connelly had a Dublin accent and it won on me; moreover, I
-also had had troubles traceable to rum.
-
-“Come home,” I said; “you can’t stand here all night. Come home; I’ll go
-with you and have a talk with the old lady myself. Perhaps I’ll find a
-way to soften her or make her see reason.”
-
-“She’s incapable of seeing reason,” said Connelly; “incapable of seeing
-anything save money. She understands nothing but gold. She’ll hold me
-captive a week; then if I don’t pay, she’ll have me arrested. You don’t
-know the ‘old lady:’ she’s a demon unless she’s paid.”
-
-However, I led Connelly over to Sixth Avenue and restored his optimism
-with strong drink. Then I bought a quart of whiskey; thus sustained,
-Connelly summoned courage and together we sought his quarters. In his
-little room we sat all night, discussing the whiskey and Dublin and
-Connelly’s hard fate.
-
-With the morning I was presented to the “old lady,”--an honor to make
-one quake. When I reviewed her acrid features, I knew that Connelly
-was right. Nothing could move that stony heart but money. I put off,
-therefore, those gallantries and blandishments I might otherwise have
-introduced, and came at once to the question.
-
-“How much does Connelly owe?”
-
-“Thirty dollars!”
-
-The words were emphasized with a click of teeth that would have done
-credit to a rat-trap.
-
-There was a baleful gleam, too, in the jadestone eye. Clearly, Connelly
-had read the signs aright. He might regard himself as a prisoner until
-the “old lady” was paid.
-
-That iron landlady went away to her duties and I counted my fortunes.
-They assembled but twenty-four dollars--a slim force and not one
-wherewith to storm the citadel of Connelly’s troubles. How should I
-augment my capital? I knew of but one quick method and that flowed with
-risks--it was the races.
-
-I turned naturally to the horses, for it was those continuous efforts
-which I put forth to name winners that had so dissipated my patrimony.
-About the time I might have selected a victor now and then, my wealth
-was departed away. It is always thus. Sinister yet satirical paradox!
-the best judges of racing have ever the least money!
-
-There was no new way open to me, however, in this instance of Connelly.
-I must pay his debt that day if I would redeem him from this Bastile of
-a boarding-house, and the races were my single chance. I explained to
-Connelly; obtained him the consolation of a second quart wherewith to
-cure the sharper cares of his bondage, and started for the race-course.
-I knew nothing of American horses and less of American tracks, but I
-held not back for that. In the transaction of a work of virtue I would
-trust to lucky stars.
-
-As I approached the race-course gates, my eyes were pleased with the
-vision of that excellent pugilist, Joe Coburn. I had known this unworthy
-in Melbourne; he had graced the ringside on those bustling occasions
-when I pulled shirt over head and held up my hands for the stakes and
-the honor of old Ireland. Grown too fat for fisticuffs, Coburn struggled
-with the races for his daily bread. As he was very wise of horses, and
-likewise very crooked, I bethought me that Coburn’s advice might do me
-good. If there were a trap set, Coburn should know; and he might aid a
-former fellow-gladiator to have advantage thereof and show the road to
-riches.
-
-Are races ever crooked? Man! I whiles wonder at the age’s ignorance!
-Crooked? Indubitably crooked. There was never rascal like your rascal
-of sport; there’s that in the word to disintegrate integrity. I make
-no doubt it was thus in every time and clime and that even the Olympian
-games themselves were honeycombed with fraud, and the sacred Altis
-wherein they were celebrated a mere hotbed of robbery. However, to
-regather with the doubtful though sapient Coburn.
-
-“Who’s to win the first race?” I asked.
-
-“Play Blue Bells!” and Coburn looked at me hard and as one who held
-mysterious knowledge.
-
-Blue Bells!--I put a cautious five-dollar piece on Blue Bells. I saw
-her at the start. Vilest of beasts, she never finished--never met my
-eye again. I asked someone what had become of her. He said that, taking
-advantage of sundry missing boards over on the back-stretch, Blue Bells
-had bolted and gone out through the fence. This may have been fact or
-it may have been sarcasmal fiction; the truth important is, I lost my
-wager.
-
-Still true to a first impression--though I confess to confidence a trifle
-shaken--I again sought Coburn.
-
-“That was a great tip you gave me!” I said. “That suggestion of Blue
-Bells was a marvel! What do you pick for the next?”
-
-“Get Tambourine!” retorted Coburn. “It’s a sure thing.”
-
-Another five I placed on Tambourine; not without misgivings. But what
-might I do better? My judgment was worthless where I did not know one
-horse from another. I might as well take Coburn’s advice; the more since
-he went often wrong and might name a winner by mistake. Five, therefore,
-on Tambourine; and when he started my hopes and Connelly--whose
-consoling quart must be a pint by now--went with him.
-
-At the worst I may so far compliment Tambourine as to say that I saw him
-again. He finished far in the rear; but at least he had the honesty to
-go around the course. Yet it was five dollars lost. When Tambourine went
-back to his stable, my capital was reduced by half, and Connelly and
-liberty as far apart as when we started.
-
-Following the disaster of Tambourine I sought no more the Coburn.
-Clearly it was not that philosopher’s afternoon for naming winners. Or
-if it were, he was keeping their names a secret.
-
-Thus ruminating, I sat reading the race card, when of a blinking
-sudden my eye was caught by the words “Bill Breen.” The title seemed a
-suggestion. Bill Breen had been my roommate--my best friend in the days
-of old Trinity. I pondered the coincidence.
-
-“If this Bill Breen,” I reflected, “is half as fast as my Bill Breen,
-he’s fit to carry Cæsar and his fortunes.”
-
-The more I considered, the more I was impressed. It was like sinking in
-a quicksand. In the end I was caught. I waxed reckless and placed ten
-dollars--fairly my residue of riches--on Bill Breen in one of those
-old-fashioned French Mutual pools common of that hour; having done so, I
-crept away to a lonesome seat in the grandstand and trembled. It was now
-or never, and Bill Breen would race freighted with the fate of Connelly.
-
-About two seats to my right, and with no one between, sat a round,
-bloated body of a man. He looked so much like a pig that, had he been
-put in a sty, you would have had nothing save the fact that he wore a
-hat to distinguish him from the other inmates. And yet I could tell by
-the mien of him, and his airs of lofty isolation and superiority, that
-he knew all about a horse--knew so much more than common folk that he
-despised them and withdrew from their society. It was like tempting
-the skies to speak to him, so wrapped was he in the dignity of his
-vast knowledge, but my quaking solicitude over Bill Breen and the awful
-stakes he ran for in poor Connelly’s evil case, emboldened me. With a
-look, deprecatory at once and apologetic, I turned to this oracle:
-
-“Do you know a horse named Bill Breen?” I asked.
-
-“I do,” he replied coldly. Then ungrammatically: “That’s him walking
-down the track to the scales for the ‘jock’ to weigh in,” and he pointed
-to a greyhound-shaped chestnut.
-
-“Can he race?” I said, with a gingerly air of merest curiosity.
-
-“He can race, but he won’t,” and the swinish man twined the huge gold
-chain about his right fore-hoof. “I lost fifty dollars on him Choosday.
-The horse can race, but he won’t; he’s crazy.”
-
-“He looks well,” I observed timidly.
-
-“Sure! he looks well,” assented the swinish one; “but never mind his
-looks; he won’t win.”
-
-Then came the start and the horses got away on the first trial. They
-went off in a bunch, and it gave me some color of satisfaction to note
-Bill Breen well to the front.
-
-“He has a good start,” I ventured.
-
-“Hang the start!” derided the swinish one.
-
-“He won’t win, I tell you; he’ll go and jump over the fence and never
-come back.”
-
-As the horses went from the quarter to the half mile post, Bill Breen,
-running easily, was strongly in the lead and increasing. My blood began
-to tingle.
-
-“He’s ahead at the half mile.”
-
-“And what of it?” retorted the swinish one, disgustedly. “Now keep your
-eye on him. In ten seconds he’ll fly up in the air and stay there. He
-won’t win; the horse is crazy.”
-
-As the field swung into the homestretch and each jockey picked his route
-for the run to the wire, Bill Breen was going like a bird, twenty yards
-to the good if a foot. The swinish one placed the heavy member that had
-been caressing the watch-chain on my shoulder. He did not wait for any
-comment from me.
-
-“Sit still,” he howled; “sit still. He won’t win. If he can’t lose any
-other way, he’ll stop back beyant on the stretch and bite the boy off
-his back. That’s what he’ll do; he’ll bite the jockey off his back.”
-
-To this last assurance, delivered with a roar, I made no answer. The
-horses were coming like a whirlwind; riders lashing, nostrils straining.
-The roll of the hoofs put my heart to a sympathetic gallop. I could not
-have said a word if I had tried. With the grandstand in a tumult, the
-horses flashed under the wire, Bill Breen winner with a flourish by a
-dozen lengths.
-
-Connelly was saved.
-
-As the horses were being dismissed, and “Bill Breen” was hung from the
-judges’ stand as “first,” the swinish one contemplated me gravely and in
-silence.
-
-“Have you a ticket on him?”
-
-“I have,” I replied.
-
-“Then you’ll win a million dollars.” This with a toss as he arose to go.
-“You’ll win a million dollars. You’re the only fool who has.”
-
-It’s like the stories you read. The swinish one was so nearly correct
-in his last remark that I found but two tickets besides my own on Bill
-Breen. It has the ring of fable, but I was richer by eleven hundred and
-thirty-two dollars when that race was over. Blue Bells and Tambourine
-were forgotten; Bill Breen had redeemed the day! It was pleasant when
-I had cashed my ticket to observe me go about recovering the lost
-Connelly.
-
-“Now, there,” cried the Jolly Doctor, “there is a story which tells of
-a joy your rich man never knows--the joy of being rescued from a money
-difficulty.”
-
-“And do you think a rich man is for that unlucky?” asked the Sour
-Gentleman.
-
-“Verily, do I,” returned the Jolly Doctor, earnestly. “I can conceive
-of nothing more dreary than endless riches--the wealth that is by the
-cradle--that from birth to death is as easy to one’s hand as water. How
-should he know the sweet who has not known the bitter? Man! the thorn is
-ever the charm of the rose.”
-
-It was discovered in the chat which followed the Red Nosed Gentleman’s
-tale that Sioux Sam might properly be regarded as the one who should
-next take up the burden of the company’s entertainment. It stood a
-gratifying characteristic of our comrade from the Yellowstone that he
-was not once found to dispute the common wish. He never proffered a
-story; but he promptly told one when asked to do so. He was taciturn,
-but he was no less ready for that, and the moment his name was called he
-proceeded with the fable of “Moh-Kwa and the Three Gifts.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XIX.--MOH-KWA AND THE THREE GIFTS.
-
-This is in the long time ago when the sun is younger an’ not so big
-an’ hot as now, an’ Kwa-Sind, the Strong Man, is a chief of the Upper
-Yellowstone Sioux. It is on a day in the Moon-of-the-first-frost an’
-Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is gathering black-berries an’ filling his
-mouth. As Moh-Kwa pulls the bush towards him, he pierces his paw with
-a great thorn so that it makes him howl an’ shout, for much is his rage
-an’ pain. Moh-Kwa cannot get the great thorn out; because Moh-Kwa’s
-claws while sharp an’ strong are not fingers to pull out a thorn; an’
-the more Moh-Kwa bites his paw to get at the thorn, the further he
-pushes it in. At last Moh-Kwa sits growling an’ looking at the thorn an’
-wondering what he is to do.
-
-[Illustration: 0295]
-
-While Moh-Kwa is wondering an’ growling, there comes walking Shaw-shaw,
-the Swallow, who is a young man of the Sioux. The Swallow has a good
-heart; but his spirit is light an’ his nature as easily blown about
-on each new wind as a dead leaf. So the Sioux have no respect for the
-Swallow but laugh when he comes among them, an’ some even call him
-Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward, for they do not look close, an’ mistake
-lightness for fear.
-
-When the Swallow came near, Moh-Kwa, still growling, held forth his paw
-an’ showed the Swallow how the thorn was buried in the big pad so that
-he could not bite it out an’ only made it go deeper. An’ with that the
-Swallow, who had a good heart, took Moh-Kwa’s big paw between his knees
-an’ pulled out the great thorn; for the Swallow had fingers an’ not
-claws like Moh-Kwa, an’ the Swallow’s fingers were deft an’ nimble to do
-any desired deed.
-
-When Moh-Kwa felt the relief of that great thorn out of his paw, he was
-grateful to the Swallow an’ thought to do him a favor.
-
-“You are laughed at,” said Moh-Kwa to the Swallow, “because your spirit
-is light as dead leaves an’ too much blown about like a tumbleweed
-wasting its seeds in foolish travelings to go nowhere for no purpose
-so that only it goes. Your heart is good, but your work is of no
-consequence, an’ your name will win no respect; an’ with years you
-will be hated since you will do no great deeds. Already men call
-you Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward. I am Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear of the
-Yellowstone, an’ I would do you a favor for taking my paw an’ the thorn
-apart. But I cannot change your nature; only Pau-guk, the Death, can do
-that; an’ no man may touch Pau-guk an’ live. Yet for a favor I will give
-you three gifts, which if you keep safe will make you rich an’ strong
-an’ happy; an’ all men will love you an’ no longer think to call you
-Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward.”
-
-Moh-Kwa when he had ended this long talk, licked his paw where had been
-the great thorn, an’ now that the smart was gone an’ he could put his
-foot to the ground an’ not howl, he took the Swallow an’ carried him to
-his house in the rocks. An’ Moh-Kwa gave the Swallow a knife, a necklace
-of bear-claws, an’ a buffalo robe.
-
-“While you carry the knife,” said Moh-Kwa, “all men will respect an’
-fear you an’ the squaws will cherish you in their hearts. While you wear
-the bear-claws, you will be brave an’ strong, an’ whatever you want you
-will get. As for the skin of the buffalo, it is big medicine, an’ if you
-sit upon it an’ wish, it will carry you wherever you ask to go.”
-
-Besides the knife, the bear-claws an’ the big medicine robe, Moh-Kwa
-gave the Swallow the thorn he had pulled from his foot, telling him
-to sew it in his moccasin, an’ when he was in trouble it would bring
-Moh-Kwa to him to be a help. Also, Moh-Kwa warned the Swallow to beware
-of a cunning squaw.
-
-“For,” said Moh-Kwa, “your nature is light like dead leaves, an’ such as
-you seek ever to be a fool about a cunning squaw.”
-
-When the Swallow came again among the Sioux he wore the knife an’ the
-bear-claws that Moh-Kwa had given him; an’ in his lodge he spread the
-big medicine robe. An’ because of the knife an’ the bear-claws, the
-warriors respected an’ feared him, an’ the squaws loved him in their
-hearts an’ followed where he went with their eyes. Also, when he wanted
-anything, the Swallow ever got it; an’ as he was swift an’ ready to want
-things, the Swallow grew quickly rich among the Sioux, an’ his lodge
-was full of robes an’ furs an’ weapons an’ new dresses of skins an’
-feathers, while more than fifty ponies ate the grass about it.
-
-Now, this made Kwa-Sind, the Strong Man, angry in his soul’s soul; for
-Kwa-Sind was a mighty Sioux, an’ had killed a Pawnee for each of his
-fingers, an’ a Blackfoot an’ a Crow for each of his toes, an’ it
-made his breast sore to see the Swallow, who had been also called
-Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward, thought higher among the Sioux an’ be a
-richer man than himself. Yet Kwa-Sind was afraid to kill the Swallow
-lest the Sioux who now sung the Swallow’s praises should rise against
-him for revenge.
-
-Kwa-Sind told his hate to Wah-bee-noh, who was a medicine man an’
-juggler, an’ agreed that he would give Wah-bee-noh twenty ponies to make
-the Swallow again as he was so that the Sioux would laugh at him an’
-call him Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward.
-
-Wah-bee-noh, the medicine man, was glad to hear the offer of Kwa-Sind,
-for he was a miser an’ thought only how he might add another pony to his
-herd. Wah-bee-noh told Kwa-Sind he would surely do as he asked, an’ that
-the Swallow within three moons would be despised among all the Sioux.
-
-Wah-bee-noh went to his lodge an’ made his strongest medicine an’ called
-Jee-bi, the Spirit. An’ Jee-bi, the Spirit, told Wah-bee-noh of the
-Swallow’s knife an’ bear-claws an’ the medicine robe.
-
-An’ now Wah-bee-noh made a plan an’ gave it to his daughter who was
-called Oh-pee-chee, the Robin, to carry out; for the Robin was full of
-craft an’ cunning, an’ moreover, beautiful among the young girls of the
-Sioux.
-
-The Robin dressed herself until she was like the red bird; an’ then she
-walked up an’ down in front of the lodge of the Swallow. An’ when the
-Swallow saw her, his nature which was light as dead leaves at once
-became drawn to the Robin, an’ the Swallow laughed an’ made a place by
-his side for the Robin to sit down. With that the Robin came an’ sat by
-his side; an’ after a little she sang to him Ewah-yeah, the Sleep-song,
-an’ the Swallow was overcome; his eyes closed an’ slumber settled down
-upon him like a night-fog.
-
-Then the Robin stole the knife from its sheath an’ the bear-claws from
-about the neck of the Swallow; but the medicine robe the Robin could not
-get because the Swallow was asleep upon it, an’ if she pulled it from
-beneath him he would wake up.
-
-The Robin took the knife an’ the bear-claws an’ carried them to
-Wah-bee-noh, her father, who got twelve ponies from Kwa-Sind for them
-an’ added the ponies to his herd. An’ the heart of Wah-bee-noh danced
-the miser’s dance of gain in his bosom from mere gladness; an’ because
-he would have eight more ponies from Kwa-Sind, he sent the Robin back to
-steal the medicine robe when the Swallow should wake up.
-
-The Robin went back, an’ finding the Swallow still asleep on the
-medicine robe, lay down by his side; an’ soon she too fell asleep, for
-the Robin was a very tired squaw since to be cunning an’ full of craft
-is hard work an’ soon wearies one.
-
-When the Swallow woke up he missed his knife an’ bear-claws. Also, he
-remembered that Moh-Kwa had warned him for the lightness of his spirit
-to beware of a cunning squaw. When these thoughts came to the Swallow,
-an’ seeing the Robin still sleeping by his side, he knew well that she
-had stolen his knife an’ bear-claws.
-
-Now, the Swallow fell into a great anger an’ thought an’ thought what
-he should do to make the Robin return the knife an’ bear-claws she had
-stolen. Without them the Sioux would laugh at him an’ despise him as
-before, an’ many would again call him Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward, an’
-the name bit into the Swallow’s heart like a rattlesnake an’ poisoned it
-with much grief.
-
-While the Swallow thought an’ the Robin still lay sleeping, a plan came
-to him; an’ with that, the Swallow seeing he was with the Robin lying
-on the medicine robe, sat up an’ wished that both himself an’ the Robin
-were in a far land of rocks an’ sand where a great pack of wolves lived.
-
-Like the flash an’ the flight of an arrow, the Swallow with the Robin
-still asleep by his side, an’ with the medicine robe still beneath them
-on the ground, found himself in a desolate land of rocks an’ sands, an’
-all about him came a band of wolves who yelped an’ showed their teeth
-with the hunger that gnawed their flanks.
-
-Because the wolves yelped, the Robin waked up; an’ when she saw their
-white teeth shining with hunger she fell down from a big fear an’ cried
-an’ twisted one hand with the other, thinking Pau-guk, the Death, was on
-his way to get her. The Robin wept an’ turned to the Swallow an’ begged
-him to put her back before the lodge of Wah-bee-noh, her father.
-
-But the Swallow, with the anger of him who is robbed, spoke hard words
-out of his mouth.
-
-“Give me back the knife an’ the bear-claws you have stolen. You are a
-bad squaw, full of cunning an’ very crafty; but here I shall keep you
-an’ feed you--legs an’ arms an’ head an’ body--to my wolf-friends
-who yelp an’ show their teeth out yonder, unless I have my knife an’
-bear-claws again.”
-
-This brought more fear on the Robin, an’ she felt that the Swallow’s
-words were as a shout for Pau-guk, the Death, to make haste an’ claim
-her; yet her cunning was not stampeded but stood firm in her heart.
-
-The Robin said that the Swallow must give her time to grow calm an’
-then she would find the knife an’ bear-claws for him. While the Swallow
-waited, the Robin still wept an’ sobbed for fear of the white teeth of
-the wolves who stood in a circle about them. But little by little, the
-crafty Robin turned her sobs softly into Ewah-yeah, the Sleep-song; an’
-soon slumber again tied the hands an’ feet an’ stole the eyes of the
-Swallow.
-
-Now the Robin did not hesitate. She tore the big medicine robe from
-beneath the Swallow; throwing herself into its folds, the Robin wished
-herself again before Wah-bee-noh’s lodge, an’ with that the robe rushed
-with her away across the skies like the swoop of a hawk. The Swallow was
-only awake in time to see the Robin go out of sight like a bee hunting
-its hive.
-
-Now the Swallow was so cast down with shame that he thought he would
-call Pau-guk, the Death, an’ give himself to the wolves who sat watching
-with their hungry eyes. But soon his heart came back, an’ his spirit
-which was light as dead leaves, stirred about hopefully in his bosom.
-
-While he considered what he should now do, helpless an’ hungry, in this
-desolate stretch of rocks an’ sand an’ no water, the thorn which
-had been in Moh-Kwa’s paw pricked his foot where it lay sewed in his
-moccasin. With that the Swallow wished he might only see the Wise Bear
-to tell him his troubles.
-
-As the Swallow made this wish, an’ as if to answer it, he saw Moh-Kwa
-coming across the rocks an’ the sand. When the wolves saw Moh-Kwa, they
-gave a last howl an’ ran for their hiding places.
-
-Moh-Kwa himself said nothing when he came up, an’ the Swallow spoke not
-for shame but lay quiet while Moh-Kwa took him by the belt which was
-about his middle an’ throwing him over his shoulder as if the Swallow
-were a dead deer, galloped off like the wind for his own house.
-
-When Moh-Kwa had reached his house, he gave the Swallow a piece of
-buffalo meat to eat. Then Moh-Kwa said:
-
-“Because you would be a fool over a beautiful squaw who was cunning, you
-have lost my three gifts that were your fortune an’ good fame. Still,
-because you were only a fool, I will get them back for you. You must
-stay here, for you cannot help since your spirit is as light as dead
-leaves, an’ would not be steady for so long a trail an’ one which calls
-for so much care to follow.”
-
-Then Moh-Kwa went to the door of his house an’ called his three
-friends, Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, Sub-bee-kah-shee, the Spider, an’
-Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly; an’ to these he said:
-
-“Because you are great warriors an’ fear nothing in your hearts I have
-called you.”
-
-An’ at that, Wah-wah-tah-see, an’ Sub-bee-kah-shee, an’ Sug-gee-mah
-stood very straight an’ high, for being little men it made them proud
-because so big a bear as Moh-Kwa had called them to be his help.
-
-“To you, Sub-bee-kah-shee,” said Moh-Kwa, turning to the Spider, “I
-leave Kwa-Sind; to you, Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, falls the honor of
-slaying Wah-bee-noh, the bad medicine man; while unto you, Sug-gee-mah
-descends the hardest task, for you must fight a great battle with
-Nee-pah-win, the Sleep.”
-
-Moh-Kwa gave his orders to his three friends; an’ with that
-Sub-bee-kah-shee, crept to the side of Kwa-Sind where he slept an’ bit
-him on the cheek; an’ Kwa-Sind turned first gray an’ then black with the
-spider’s venom, an’ then died in the hands of Pau-guk, the Death, who
-had followed the Spider to Kwa-Sind’s lodge.
-
-[Illustration: 0305]
-
-While this was going forward, Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, came as
-swift as wing could carry to the lodge where Wah-bee-noh was asleep
-rolled up in a bear-skin. Wah-bee-noh was happy, for with the big
-medicine robe which the Robin had brought him, he already had bought the
-eight further ponies from Kwa-Sind an’ they then grazed in Wah-bee-noh’s
-herd. As Wah-bee-noh laughed in his sleep because he dreamed of the
-twenty ponies he had earned from Kwa-Sind, the Firefly stooped an’ stung
-him inside his mouth. An’ so perished Wah-bee-noh in a flame of fever,
-for the poison of Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, burns one to death like
-live coals.
-
-Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, found Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, holding the
-Robin fast. But Sug-gee-mah was stout, an’ he stooped an’ stung the
-Sleep so hard he let go of the Robin an’ stood up to fight.
-
-All night an’ all day an’ all night, an’ yet many days an’ nights, did
-Sug-gee-mah, the ‘bold Mosquito, an’ Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, fight for
-the Robin. An’ whenever Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, would take the Robin in
-his arms, ‘Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, would strike him with his little
-lance. For many days an’ nights did Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, hold
-Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, at bay; an’ in the end the Robin turned wild an’
-crazy, for unless Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, takes each man an’ woman in
-his arms when the sun goes down it is as if they were bitten by the evil
-polecats who are rabid; an’ the men an’ women who are not held in the
-arms of Nee-pah-win go mad an’ rave like starved wolves till they die.
-An’ thus it was with the Robin. After many days an’ nights, Pau-guk,
-the Death, came for her also, an’ those three who had done evil to the
-Swallow were punished.
-
-Moh-Kwa, collecting the knife, the bear-claws an’ the big medicine robe
-from the lodge of Kwa-Sind, gave them to the Swallow again. This time
-the Swallow stood better guard, an’ no squaw, however cunning, might
-make a fool of him--though many tried--so he kept his knife, the
-bear-claws, an’ the big medicine robe these many years while he lived.
-
-As for Sub-bee-kah-shee, the Spider, an’ Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly,
-an’ Sug-gee-mah, the brave Mosquito, Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, for a
-reward gave them an’ their countless squaws an’ papooses forever that
-fine swamp where Apuk-wah, the Bulrush, grows thick an’ green, an’
-makes a best hunting grounds for the three little warriors who killed
-Kwa-Sind, Wah-bee-noh, an’ the Robin on that day when Moh-Kwa called
-them his enemies. An’ now when every man was at peace an’ happy, Moh-Kwa
-brought the Sioux together an’ re-named the Swallow “Thorn-Puller;” an’
-by that name was he known till he died.
-
-“How many are there of these Sioux folk-lore tales?” asked the Jolly
-Doctor of Sioux Sam.
-
-“How many leaves in June?” asked Sioux Sam. “If our Great Medicine”--so
-he called the Jolly Doctor--“were with the Dakotahs, the old men an’
-the squaws would tell him a fresh one for every fresh hour of his life.
-There is no end.”
-
-While the Jolly Doctor was reflecting on this reply, the Red Nosed
-Gentleman, raising his glass of burgundy to the Sour Gentleman who
-returned the compliment in whiskey, said:
-
-“My respects to you, sir; and may we hope you will now give us that
-adventure of The German Girl’s Diamonds?”
-
-“I shall have the utmost pleasure,” responded the Sour Gentleman. “You
-may not consider it of mighty value as a story, but perhaps as a chapter
-in former Custom’s iniquity one may concede it a use.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XX.--THE GERMAN GIRL’S DIAMONDS.
-
-It cannot be said, my friends, that I liked my position in that sink of
-evil, the New York Customs. I was on good terms with my comrades, but I
-founded no friendships among them. It has been and still is a belief of
-mine, and one formed at an early age, that everybody wears suggestive
-resemblance to some bird or fish or beast. I’ve seen a human serpent’s
-face, triangular, poisonous, menacing with ophidian eyes; I’ve seen a
-dove’s face, soft, gentle, harmless, and with lips that cooed as they
-framed and uttered words. And there are faces to remind one of dogs, of
-sheep, of apes, of swine, of eagles, of pike--ravenous, wide-mouthed,
-swift. I’ve even encountered a bear’s face on Broadway--one full of a
-window-peering curiosity, yet showing a contented, sluggish sagacity
-withal. And every face about me in the Customs would carry out my
-theory. As I glanced from Lorns to Quin, and from Quin to another, and
-so to the last upon the list, I beheld reflected as in a glass, a hawk,
-or an owl, or a wolf, or a fox, or a ferret, or even a cat. But each
-rapacious; each stamped with the instinct of predation as though the
-word “Wolf” were written across his forehead. Even Betelnut Jack gave
-one the impression that belongs with some old, rusty black-eagle with
-worn and tumbled plumage. I took no joy of my comrades; saw no more of
-them than I might; despised my trade of land-pirate--for what better
-could it be called?--and following that warning from “Josephus” was
-ever haunted of a weird fear of what might come. Still, I remained and
-claimed my loot with the rest. And you ask why? When all is said, I
-was as voracious as the others; I clinked the coins in my pocket, and
-consoled myself against the foul character of such profits with that
-thought of Vespasian: “The smell of all money is sweet.”
-
-Following my downfall of tobacco, I had given up my rich apartments in
-Twenty-second Street; and while I retained my membership, I went no more
-to the two or three clubs into which I’d been received. In truth, these
-Custom House days I seldom strolled as far northward as Twenty-third
-Street; but taking a couple of moderate rooms to the south of Washington
-Square, I stuck to them or to the park in front as much as ever I might;
-passing a lonely life and meeting none I’d known before.
-
-One sun-filled September afternoon, being free at that hour, I was
-occupying a bench in Washington Square, amusing my idleness with the
-shadows chequered across the walk by an overspreading tree. A sound
-caught my ear; I looked up to be mildly amazed by the appearance of
-Betelnut Jack. It was seldom my chief was found so far from his eyrie
-in the Bowery; evidently he was seeking me. His first words averred as
-much.
-
-“I was over to your rooms,” remarked Betelnut Jack; “they told me you
-were here.”
-
-Then he gave me a pure Havana--for we of the Customs might smoke what
-cigars we would--lighted another and betook himself to a few moments of
-fragrant, wordless tranquility. I was aware, of course, that Betelnut
-Jack had a purpose in coming; but curiosity was never among my vices,
-and I did not ask his mission. With a feeling of indifference, I awaited
-its development in his own good way and time.
-
-Betelnut Jack was more apt to listen than talk; but upon this Washington
-Square afternoon, he so far departed those habits of taciturnity
-commonly his own as to furnish the weight of conversation. He did not
-hurry to his business, but rambled among a score of topics. He even
-described to me by what accident he arrived at his by-name of Betelnut
-Jack. He said he was a sailor in his youth. Then he related how he went
-on deep water ships to India and to the China seas; how he learned to
-chew betel from the Orientals; how after he came ashore he was still
-addicted to betel; how a physician, ignorant of betel and its crimson
-consequences, fell into vast excitement over what he concevied to be a
-perilous hemorrhage; and how before Jack could explain, seized on
-him and hurried him into a near-by drug shop. When he understood his
-mistake, the physician took it in dudgeon, and was inclined to blame
-Jack for those sanguinary yet fraudulent symptoms. One result of
-the adventure was to re-christen him “Betelnut Jack,” the name still
-sticking, albeit he had for long abandoned betel as a taste outgrown.
-
-Betelnut Jack continued touching his career in New York; always with
-caution, however, slurring some parts and jumping others; from which I
-argued that portions of my chief’s story were made better by not being
-divulged. It occurred, too, as a deduction drawn from his confidences
-that Betelnut Jack had been valorous as a Know-Nothing; and he spoke
-with rapture of the great prize-fighter, Tom Hyer, who beat Yankee
-Sullivan; and then of the fistic virtues of the brave Bill Poole, coming
-near to tears as he set forth the latter’s murder in Stanwix Hall.
-
-Also, I gathered that Betelnut Jack had been no laggard at hurling
-stones and smashing windows in the Astor Place riot of 1849.
-
-“And the soldiers killed one hundred and thirty-four,” sighed Betelnut
-Jack, when describing the battle; “and wounded four times as many more.
-And all, mind you! for a no-good English actor with an Irish name!” This
-last in accents of profound disgust.
-
-In the end Betelnut Jack began to wax uneasy; it was apparent how he
-yearned for his nest in the familiar Bowery. With that he came bluntly
-to the purpose.
-
-“To-morrow, early,” he said, “take one of the women inspectors and go
-down to quarantine. Some time in the course of the day, the steamship
-‘Wolfgang,’ from Bremen, will arrive. Go aboard at once. In the second
-cabin you will find a tall, gray, old German; thin, with longish hair.
-He may have on dark goggles; if he hasn’t, you will observe that he is
-blind of the right eye. His daughter, a girl of twenty-three, will
-be with him. Her hair will be done up in that heavy roll which
-hair-dressers call the ‘waterfall,’ and hang in a silk close-meshed
-net low on her neck. Hidden in the girl’s hair are diamonds of a Berlin
-value of over one hundred and twenty thousand dollars. You will search
-the old man, and have the woman inspector search the girl. Don’t conduct
-yourselves as though you knew what you were looking for. Tell your
-assistant to find the girl’s diamonds naturally; let her work to them by
-degrees, not swoop on them.”
-
-Then Betelnut Jack disposed himself for homeward flight. I asked how he
-became aware of the jewels and the place of their concealment.
-
-“Never mind that now,” was his reply; “you’ll know later. But get the
-diamonds; they’re there and you must not fail. I’ve come for you, as
-you’re more capable of doing the gentleman than some of the others, and
-this is a case where a dash of refinement won’t hurt the trick.”
-
-With that Betelnut Jack lounged over to Fourth Street and disappeared
-towards Broadway and the Bowery further east.
-
-Following my chief’s departure, I continued in idle contemplation of the
-shadows. This occupation did not forbid a mental looking up and down of
-what would be my next day’s work. The prospect was far from refreshing.
-When one is under thirty, a proposal to plunder a girl--a beautiful
-girl, doubtless--of her diamonds, does not appeal to one. There would be
-woe, tears, lamentations, misery with much wringing of hands. I began to
-call myself a villain.
-
-Then, as against her, and defensive of myself, I argued the outlaw
-character of the girl’s work. Be she beautiful or be she favored ill,
-still she is breaking the law. It was our oath to seize the gems;
-whatever of later wrong was acted, at best or worst, it was no wrong
-done her. In truth! when she was at last left free and at liberty, she
-would be favored beyond her deserts; for those Customs laws which she
-was cheating spoke of grates and keys and bars and bolts.
-
-In this wise, and as much as might be, I comforted myself against the
-disgrace of an enterprise from which I naturally recoiled, hardening
-myself as to the poor girl marked to be our prey. I confess I gained no
-great success; say what I might, I contemned myself.
-
-While thus ruminating that dishonor into which I conceived myself to
-have fallen, I recalled a story written by Edgar Allen Poe. It is a
-sketch wherein a wicked man is ever followed and thwarted by one
-who lives his exact semblance in each line of face and form. This
-doppel-ganger, as the Germans name him, while the same with himself
-in appearance and dress, is his precise opposite in moral nature. This
-struggle between the haunted one and his weird, begins in boyhood
-and continues till middle age. At the last, frantic under a final
-opposition, the haunted one draws sword and slays his enemy. Too late,
-as he wipes the blood from his blade, he finds that he has killed
-his better self; too late he sees that from that time to the end, the
-present will have no hope, the future hold no heaven; that he must sink
-and sink and sink, until he is grasped by those hands outstretched of
-hell to forever have him for their horrid own. I wondered if I were not
-like that man unhappy; I asked if I did not, by these various defenses
-and apologies which I made ever for my wickedness, work towards the
-death of my better nature whose destruction when it did come would mean
-the departure forever of my soul’s chance.
-
-I stood up and shook myself in a canine way. Decidedly, loneliness was
-making me morbid! However that may have been, I passed a far from happy
-afternoon.
-
-Fairly speaking, these contentions shook me somewhat in my resolves.
-There were moments when I determined to refuse my diamond-hunting
-commission and resign my place. I even settled the style of my
-resignation; it should be full of sarcasm.
-
-But alas! these white dreams faded; in the end I was ready to execute
-the orders of Betelnut Jack; and that which decided me was surely the
-weakest thought of all. Somehow, I had in my thoughts put down the
-coming German maiden as beautiful; Betelnut Jack had said her age was
-twenty-three, which helped me to this thought of girlish loveliness.
-Thus, my imaginings worked in favor of the girl.
-
-But next the thought fell blackly that she would some day--probably a
-near day--love some man unknown and marry him. Possibly this lover she
-already knew; perhaps he was here and she on her way to meet him! This
-will sound like jest; it will earn derision from healthful, balanced
-spirits; and yet I tell but the truth.
-
-I experienced a vague, resentful jealousy, hated this imagined lover
-of a girl I’d never met, and waxed contemptuous of aught of leniency
-towards one or both. I would do as Betelnut Jack ordered; I would go
-down to quarantine on the morrow; and I would find the diamonds.
-
-It was late in the afternoon when with a woman assistant, I boarded the
-“Wolfgang” in the Narrows. My aged German was readily picked up; his
-daughter was with him. And her beauty was as I’d painted on the canvas
-of my thoughts. Yet when I beheld the loveliness which should have
-melted me, I recalled that lover to whose arms she might be coming and
-was hardened beyond recall. I told the inspectress to take her into
-her private room and find the diamonds. With that, I turned my back and
-strolled to the forward deck. Even at that distance I heard the shriek
-of the girl when her treasure was discovered.
-
-“There will be less for the lover!” I thought.
-
-When my woman assistant--accomplice might be the truer term--joined
-me, she had the jewels. They were in a long eel-skin receptacle, sewed
-tightly, and had been secreted in the girl’s hair as described by
-Betelnut Jack. I took the gems, and buttoning them in my coat, told my
-aide--who with a feminine fashion of bitterness seemed exultant over
-having deprived another of her gew-gaws--to arrest the girl, hold her
-until the boat docked, frighten her with tales of fetters and dungeons
-and clanging bars, and at the last to lose her on the wharf. It would
-be nine o’clock of the night by then, and murk dark; this loss of her
-prisoner would seem to come honestly about.
-
-If I were making a romance, rather than bending to a relation of cold,
-gray, hard, untender facts, I would at this crisis defy Betelnut Jack,
-rescue the beautiful girl, restore her jewels, love her, win her, wed
-her, and with her true, dear arms about me, live happy ever after. As it
-was, however, I did nothing of that good sort. My aide obeyed directions
-in a mood at once thorough, blithe, and spiteful, and never more did I
-set eyes on the half-blind father or the tearful, pretty, poor victim
-of our diamond hunting. Lost in the crush and bustle of the wharf, they
-were never found, never looked for, and never rendered themselves.
-
-I had considered what profit from these jewels might accrue to the ring
-and the means by which it would be arrived at. I took it for granted
-that some substitutional arts--when paste would take the places of old
-mine gems--would be resorted to as in the excellent instance of The
-Emperor’s Cigars. But Betelnut Jack shook his careful head; there would
-be no hokus-pokus of substitution; there were good reasons. Also, there
-was another way secure. If our profits were somewhat shaved, our safety
-would be augmented; and Betelnut Jack’s watchword was “Safety first!” I
-was bound to acquiesce; I the more readily did so since, like Lorns and
-Quin, I had grown to perfect confidence in the plans of Betelnut Jack.
-However, when now I had brushed aside etiquette and broken the ice
-of the matter with my chief, I asked how he meant to manoeuver in the
-affair.
-
-“Wait!” retorted Betelnut Jack, and that was the utmost he would say.
-
-In due time came the usual auction and the gems were sold. They were
-snapped up by a syndicate of wise folk of Maiden Lane who paid therefor
-into the hands of the government the even sum of one hundred thousand
-dollars.
-
-Still I saw not how our ring would have advantage; no way could open for
-us to handle those one hundred thousand dollars in whole or in part.
-I was in error; a condition whereof I was soon to be made pleasantly
-aware.
-
-On the day following the sale, and while the price paid still slept
-unbanked in the Customs boxes of proof-steel, there came one to see our
-canny chief. It is useless to waste description on this man. Suffice it
-that he was in fact and in appearance as skulkingly the coward scoundrel
-as might anywhere be met. This creeping creature was shown into the
-private rooms of Betelnut Jack. A moment later, I was sent for.
-
-Betelnut Jack was occupying a chair; he wore an air of easy confidence;
-and over that, a sentiment of contempt for his visitor. This latter was
-posed in the middle of the room; and while an apprehension of impending
-evil showed on his face, he made cringing and deprecatory gestures with
-shoulders hunched and palms turned outward.
-
-“Sit down,” observed Betelnut Jack, pushing a chair towards me. When
-I was seated, he spoke on. “Since it was you who found the diamonds, I
-thought it right to have you present now. You asked me once how I knew
-in advance of those gems and their scheme of concealment. To-day you may
-learn. This is the gentleman who gave me the information. He did it
-to obtain the reward--to receive that great per cent, of the seizure’s
-proceeds which is promised the informer by the law. His information was
-right; he is entitled to the reward. That is what he is here for; he has
-come to be paid.” Then to the hangdog, cringing one: “Pretty good day’s
-work for you, eh? Over fifty thousand dollars for a little piece of
-information is stiff pay!” The hangdog one bowed lower and a smirk of
-partial confidence began to broaden his face. “And now you’ve come for
-your money--fifty odd thousand!”
-
-“If you please, sir! yes, sir!” More and wider smirks.
-
-“All right!” retorted Betelnut Jack. “You shall have it, friend; but not
-now--not to-day.”
-
-“Then when?” and the smirk fled.
-
-“To-morrow,” said Betelnut Jack. “To-morrow, next day, any day in fact
-when you bring before me to be witnesses of the transaction the father,
-the sister, and your wife.”
-
-Across the face of the hangdog one spread a pallor that was as the
-whiteness of death. There burned the fires of a hot agony in his eyes as
-though a dirk had slowly pierced him. His voice fell in a husky whisper.
-
-“You would cheat me!”
-
-“No; I would do you perfect justice,” replied Betelnut Jack. “Not a
-splinter do you finger until you bring your people. Your wife and her
-sister and their father shall know this story, and stand here while the
-money is paid. Not a stiver else! Now, go!”
-
-Betelnut Jack’s tones were as remorseless as a storm; they offered
-nothing to hope; the hangdog one heard and crept away with a look on
-his face that was but ill to see. Once the door was closed behind him,
-Betelnut Jack turned with a cheerful gleam to me.
-
-“That ends him! It’s as you guess. This informer is the son-in-law of
-the old German. He married the elder daughter. They came over four years
-ago and live in Hoboken. Then the father and the younger sister were to
-come. They put their whole fortune into the diamonds, aiming to cheat
-the Customs and manage a profit; and the girl wrote their plans and
-how they would hide the jewels to her sister. It was she who told her
-husband--this fellow who’s just sneaked out. He came to me and betrayed
-them; he was willing to ruin the old man and the girl to win riches for
-himself. But he’s gone; he’ll not return; we’ve seen and heard the last
-of them; one fears the jail, the other the wrath of his wife; and that’s
-the end.” Then Betelnut Jack, as he lighted a cigar, spoke the word
-which told to folk initiate of a division of spoil on the morrow. As I
-arose, he said: “Ask Lorns to come here.”
-
-*****
-
-“Well,” remarked the Old Cattleman when the Sour Gentleman was done, “I
-don’t want to say nothin’ to discourage you-all, but if I’d picked up
-your hand that time I wouldn’t have played it. I shorely would have let
-that Dutch girl keep her beads. Didn’t the thing ha’nt you afterwards?”
-
-“It gave me a deal of uneasiness,” responded the Sour Gentleman. “I am
-not proud of my performance. And yet, I don’t see what else I might have
-done. Those diamonds were as good as in the hands of Betelnut Jack from
-the moment the skulking brother-in-law brought him the information.”
-
-“It’s one relief,” observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, “to know how that
-scoundrel came off no richer by his treachery.”
-
-“What I observes partic’lar in the narration,” said the Old Cattleman,
-“is how luck is the predominatin’ feacher throughout. The girl an’ her
-old pap has bad luck in losin’ the gewgaw’s. You-all customs sharps
-has good luck in havin’ the news brought to your hand as to where them
-diamonds is hid, by a coyote whom you can bluff plumb outen the play at
-the finish. As for the coyote informer, why he has luck in bein’ allowed
-to live.
-
-“An’ speakin’ of luck, seein’ that in this yere story-tellin’
-arrangement that seems to have grown up in our midst, I’m the next
-chicken on the roost, I’ll onfold to you gents concernin’ ‘The Luck of
-Cold-sober Simms.’”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXI.--THE LUCK OF COLD-SOBER SIMMS.
-
-Which this yere tale is mighty devious, not to say disjointed, because,
-d’you see! from first to last, she’s all the truth. Now, thar is
-folks sech as Injuns an’ them sagacious sports which we-all terms
-philosophers, who talks of truth bein’ straight. Injuns will say a
-liar has a forked tongue, while philosophers will speak of a straight
-ondeviatin’ narrative, meanin’ tharby to indooce you to regyard said
-story as the emanation of honesty in its every word. For myse’f I don’t
-subscribe none to these yere phrases. In my own experience it’s the lies
-that runs in a straight line like a bullet, whereas the truth goes onder
-an’ over, an’ up an’ down, doubles an’ jumps sideways a dozen times
-before ever it finally finds its camp in what book-sharps call the
-“climax.” Which I says ag’in that this tale, bein’ troo, has nacherally
-as many kinks in it as a new lariat.
-
-Bein’ thoughtful that a-way, an’ preyed on by a desire to back-track
-every fact to its fountain-head, meanwhile considerin’ how different the
-kyards would have fallen final if something prior had been done or left
-on done, has ever been my weakness. It’s allers so with me. I can recall
-as a child how back in Tennessee I deevotes hours when fish-in’ or
-otherwise uselessly engaged, to wonderin’ whoever I’d have been personal
-if my maw had died in her girlhood an’ pap had wedded someone else.
-It’s plumb too many for me; an’ now an’ then when in a sperit of onusual
-cog’tation, I ups an’ wonders where I’d be if both my maw an’ pap had
-cashed in as colts, I’d jest simply set down he’pless, on-qualified to
-think at all. It’s plain that in sech on-toward events as my two parents
-dyin’, say, at the age of three, I sort o’ wouldn’t have happened none.
-This yere solemn view never fails to give me the horrors.
-
-I fixes the time of this story easy as bein’ that eepock when Jim
-East an’ Bob Pierce is sheriffs of the Panhandle, with headquarters
-in Tascosa, an’ Bob Roberson is chief of the LIT ranch. These yere
-evidences of merit on the parts of them three gents has not, however,
-anything to do with how Cold-sober Simms gets rich at farobank; how two
-hold-ups plots to rob him; how he’s saved by the inadvertent capture of
-a bob-cat who’s strange to him entire; an’ how the two hold-ups in their
-chagrin over Cold-sober’s escape an’ the mootual doubts it engenders,
-pulls on each other an’ relieves the Stranglers from the labor of
-stringin’ ’em to a cottonwood.
-
-These doin’s whereof I gives you a rapid rehearsal, has their start when
-Old Scotty an’ Locoed Charlie gets drunk in Tascosa prior to startin’
-west on their buckboard with the mailbags of the Lee-Scott ranch. Locoed
-Charlie an’ Old Scotty is drunk when they pulls out; Cold-sober Simms
-is with ’em as a passenger. At their night camp half way to the
-Lee-Scott, Locoed Charlie, whose head can’t stand the strain of Jenkins’
-nose-paint, makes war-medicine an’ lays for Old Scotty all spraddled
-out. As the upcome of these yere hostilities, Old Scotty confers a most
-elab’rate beatin’ on Locoed Charlie; after which they-all cooks their
-grub, feeds, an’ goes to sleep.
-
-But Locoed Charlie don’t go to sleep; he lays thar drunk an’ disgruntled
-an’ hungerin’ to play even. As a good revengeful scheme, Locoed Charlie
-allows he’ll get up an’ secrete the mailbag, thinkin’ tharby to worry
-Old Scotty till he sweats blood. Locoed Charlie packs the mailbag over
-among some rocks which is thick grown with cedar bresh. When it comes
-sun-up an’ Locoed Charlie is sober an’ repents, an’ tells Old Scotty
-of his little game, neither he nor Scotty can find that mailbag nohow.
-Locoed Charlie shore hides her good.
-
-Locoed Charlie an’ Scotty don’t dare go on without it, but stays an’
-searches; Cold-sober Simms--who is given this yere nom-de-guerre, as
-Colonel Sterett terms it, because he’s the only sport in the Panhandle
-who don’t drink--stays with ’em to help on the hunt. At last, failin’
-utter to discover the missin’ mail, Locoed Charlie an’ Old Scotty
-returns to Tascosa in fear an’ tremblin’, not packin’ the nerve to
-face McAllister, who manages for the Lee-Scott, an’ inform him of the
-yoonique disposition they makes of his outfit’s letters. This return
-to Tascosa is, after all, mere proodence, since McAllister is a mighty
-emotional manager, that a-way, an’ it’s as good as even money he hangs
-both of them culprits in that first gust of enthoosiasm which would
-be shore to follow any explanation they can make. So they returns; an’
-because he can’t he’p himse’f none, bein’ he’s only a passenger on that
-buckboard, Cold-sober Simms returns with ’em. No, the mailbag is
-found a week later by a Lee-Scott rider, an’ for the standin’ of Locoed
-Charlie an’ Scotty it’s as well he does.
-
-Cold-sober is some sore at bein’ baffled in his trip to the Lee-Scott
-since he aims to go to work thar as a rider. To console himse’f, he
-turns in an’ bucks a faro game that a brace of onknown black-laigs who
-shows in Tascosa from Fort Elliot the day prior, has onfurled in
-James’ s’loon. As sometimes happens, Cold-sober plays in all brands
-an’ y’earmarks of luck, an’ in four hours breaks the bank. It ain’t
-overstrong, no sech institootion of finance in fact as Cherokee Hall’s
-faro game in Wolfville, an’ when Cold-sober calls the last nine-king
-turn for one hundred, an’ has besides a hundred on the nine, coppered,
-an’ another hundred open on the king, tharby reapin’ six hundred dollars
-as the froots of said feat, the sharp who’s deal-in’ turns up his box
-an’ tells Cold-sober to set in his chips to be cashed. Cold-sober sets
-’em in; nine thousand five hundred dollars bein’ the roundup, an’ the
-dealer-sharp hands over the dinero. Then in a sperit of resentment the
-dealer-sharp picks up the faro-box an’ smashes it ag’in the wall.
-
-“Thar bein’ nothin’ left,” he says to his fellow black-laig, who’s
-settin’ in the look-out’s chair, “for you an’ me but to prance out an’
-stand up a stage, we may as well dismiss that deal-box from our affairs.
-I knowed that box was a hoodoo ever since Black Morgan gets killed over
-it in Mobeetie; an’ so I tells you, but you-all wouldn’t heed.”
-
-Cold-sober is shore elated about his luck; them nine thousand odd
-dollars is more wealth than he ever sees; an’ how to dispose of it, now
-he’s got it, begins to bother Cold-sober a heap. One gent says, “Hive
-it in Howard’s Store!” another su’gests he leave it with old man Cohn;
-while still others agrees it’s Cold-sober’s dooty to blow it in.
-
-“Which if I was you-all,” says Johnny Cook of the LIT outfit, “I’d
-shore sally forth an’ buy nose-paint with that treasure while a peso
-remained.” But Cold-sober turns down these divers proposals an’ allows
-he’ll pack said roll in his pocket a whole lot, which he accordin’ does.
-
-Cold-sober hangs ’round Tascosa for mighty near a week, surrenderin’ all
-thought of gettin’ to the Lee-Scott ranch, feelin’ that he’s now
-too rich to punch cattle. Doorin’ this season of idleness art’ease,
-Cold-sober bunks in with a jimcrow English doctor who’s got a ’doby in
-Tascosa an’ who calls himse’f Chepp. He’s a decent form of maverick,
-however, this yere Chepp, an’ him an’ Cold-sober becomes as thick as
-thieves.
-
-Cold-sober’s stay with Chepp is brief as I states; in a week he gets
-restless ag’in for work; whereupon he hooks up with Roberson, an’ goes
-p’intin’ south across the Canadian on a L I T hoss to hold down one of
-that brand’s sign-camps in Mitchell’s canyon. It’s only twenty miles,
-an’ lie’s thar in half a day--him an’ Wat Peacock who’s to be his mate.
-An’ Cold-sober packs with him that fortune of ninety-five hundred.
-
-The two black-laigs who’s been depleted that away still hankers about
-Tascosa; but as mighty likely they don’t own the riches to take ’em
-out o’ town, not much is thought. Nor does it ruffle the feathers of
-commoonal suspicion when the two disappears a few days after Cold-sober
-goes ridin’ away to assoome them LIT reesponsibilities in Mitchell’s
-canyon. The public is too busy to bother itse’f about ’em. It comes
-out later, however, that the goin’ of Cold-sober has everything to do
-with the exodus of them hold-ups, an’ that they’ve been layin’ about
-since they loses their roll on a chance of get-tin’ it back. When
-Cold-sober p’ints south for Mitchell’s that time, it’s as good as these
-outlaws asks. They figgers on trailin’ him to Mitchell’s an’ hidin’ out
-ontil some hour when Peacock’s off foolin’ about the range; when they
-argues Cold-sober would be plumb easy, an’ they’ll kill an’ skelp him
-an’ clean him up for his money, an’ ride away.
-
-“In fact,” explains the one Cold-sober an’ Peacock finds alive, “it’s
-our idee that the killin’ an’ skelpin’ an’ pillagin’ of Cold-sober would
-get layed to Peacock, which would mean safety for us an’ at the same
-time be a jest on Peacock that would be plumb hard to beat.” That was
-the plan of these outlaws; an’ the cause of its failure is the followin’
-episode, to wit:
-
-It looks like this Doc Chepp is locoed to collect wild anamiles that
-a-way.
-
-“Which I wants,” says this shorthorn Chepp, “a speciment of every sort
-o’ the fauna of these yere regions, savin’ an’ exceptin’ polecats. I
-knows enough of the latter pungent beast from an encounter I has with
-one, to form notions ag’in ’em over which not even the anxious cry of
-science can preevail. Polecats is barred from my c’llec-tions. But,”
- an’ said Chepp imparts this last to Cold-sober as the latter starts for
-Mitchell’s, “if by any sleight or dexterity you-all accomplishes the
-capture of a bob-cat, bring the interestin’ creature to me at once. An’
-bring him alive so I may observe an’ note his pecooliar traits.”
-
-It’s the third mornin’ in Mitchell’s when a bobcat is seen by Cold-sober
-an’ Peacock to go sa’nter-in’ up the valley. Mebby this yere bob-cat’s
-homeless; mebby he’s a dissoloote bob-cat an’ has been out all night
-carousin’ with other bob-cats an’ is simply late gettin’ in; be the
-reason of his appearance what it may, Cold-sober remembers about Doc
-Chepp’s wish to own a bob-cat, an’ him an’ Peacock lets go all holds,
-leaps for their ponies an’ gives chase. Thar’s a scramblin’ run up the
-canyon; then Peacock gets his rope onto it, an’ next Cold-sober fastens
-with his rope, an’ you hear me, gents, between ’em they almost rends
-this yere onhappy bobcat in two. They pauses in time, however, an’ after
-a fearful struggle they succeeds in stuffin’ the bob-cat into Peacock’s
-leather laiggin’s, which the latter gent removes for that purpose.
-Bound hand an’ foot, an’ wropped in the laiggin’s so tight he can hardly
-squawl, that bob-cat’s put before Cold-sober on his saddle; an’
-this bein’ fixed, Cold-sober heads for Tascosa to present him to his
-naturalist friend, Chepp, Peacock scamperin’ cheerfully along like a
-drunkard to a barbecue regyardin’ the racket as a ondeniable excuse for
-gettin’ soaked.
-
-This adventure of the bob-cat is the savin’ clause in the case of
-Cold-sober Simms. As the bobcat an’ him an’ Peacock rides away, them two
-malefactors is camped not five miles off, over by the Serrita la Cruz,
-an’ arrangin’ to go projectin’ ’round for Cold-sober an’ his ninety-five
-hundred that very evenin’. In truth, they execootes their scheme; but
-only to find when they jumps his camp in Mitchell’s that Cold-sober’s
-done vamosed a whole lot.
-
-It’s then trouble begins to gather for the two rustlers. The one who
-deals the game that time is so overcome by Cold-sober’s absence, he
-peevishly puts it up that his pard gives Cold-sober warnin’ with the
-idee of later whackin’ up the roll with him by way of a reward for his
-virchoo. Nacherally no se’f-respectin’ miscreant will submit to sech
-impeachments, an’ the accoosed makes a heated retort, punctuatin’ his
-observations with his gun. Thar-upon the other proceeds to voice his
-feelin’s with his six-shooter; an’ the mootual remarks of these yere
-dispootants is so well aimed an’ ackerate that next evenin’ when
-Cold-sober an’ Peacock returns, they finds one dead an’ t’other dyin’
-with even an’ exact jestice broodin’ over all.
-
-As Cold-sober an’ Peacock is settin’ by their fire that night, restin’
-from their labors in plantin’ the two hold-ups, Cold-sober starts up
-sudden an’ says:
-
-“Yereafter I adopts a bob-cat for my coat-o’-arms. Also, I changes my
-mind about Howard, an’ to-morry I’ll go chargin’ into Tascosa an’ leave
-said ninety-five hundred in his iron box. Thar’s more ‘bad men’ at Fort
-Elliot than them two we plants, an’ mebby some more of ’em may come
-a-weavin’ up the Canadian with me an’ my wealth as their objective
-p’int.”
-
-Peacock endorses the notion enthoosiastic, an’ declar’s himse’f in on
-the play as a body-guard; for he sees in this yere second expedition a
-new o’casion for another drunk, an’ Peacock jest nacherally dotes on a
-debauch.
-
-*****
-
-“And what did your Cold-sober Simms,” asked the Sour Gentleman, “finally
-do with his money? Did he go into the cattle business?”
-
-“Never buys a hoof,” returned the Old Cattleman. “No, indeed; he loses
-it ag’in monte in Kelly’s s’loon in Dodge. Charley Bassett who’s marshal
-at the time tries to git Cold-sober to pass up that monte game. But thar
-ain’t no headin’ him; he would buck it, an’ so the sharp who’s deal-in’,
-Butcher Knife Bill it is--turns in an’ knocks Cold-sober’s horns plumb
-off.”
-
-The sudden collapse of the volatile Cold-sober’s fortunes was quite a
-dampener to the Sour Gentleman; he evidently entertained a hope that the
-lucky cow-boy was fated to a rise in life. The news of his final losses
-had less effect on the Red Nosed Gentleman who, having witnessed no
-little gambling in his earlier years, seemed better prepared. In truth,
-a remark he let fall would show as much.
-
-“I was sure he would lose it,” said the Red Nosed Gentleman. “Men win
-money only to lose it to the first game they can find. However, to
-change the subject:” Here the Red Nosed Gentleman beamed upon the Jolly
-Doctor. “Sir, the hour is young. Can’t you aid us to finish the evening
-with another story?”
-
-“There is one I might give you,” responded the Jolly Doctor. “It is of
-a horse-race like that Rescue of Connelly you related and was told me by
-an old friend and patient who I fear was a trifle wild as a youth. This
-is the story as set forth by himself, and for want of a more impressive
-title, we may call it ‘How Prince Rupert Lost.’”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXII.--HOW PRINCE RUPERT LOST.
-
-And now I’ll tell you how I once threw stones at Hartford and thereby
-gained queer money to carry me to the bedside of my mother at her death.
-
-My father, you should know, was a lawyer of eminence and wide practice
-at the New York bar. His income was magnificent; yet--thriftless and
-well living--he spent it with both hands. My mother, who took as little
-concern for the future as himself, aided pleasantly in scattering the
-dollars as fast as they were earned.
-
-With no original estate on either side, and not a shilling saved, it was
-to be expected that my father’s death should leave us wanting a penny. I
-was twenty-two when the blow fell; he died stricken of an apoplexy, his
-full habit and want of physical exercise marking him to that malady as a
-certain prey.
-
-I well recall how this death came upon us as a bolt from the blue. And
-while his partner stood over our affairs like a brother, when the debts
-were paid there remained no more than would manage an annuity for
-my mother of some six hundred dollars. With that she retreated to
-Westchester and lived the little balance of her years with a maiden
-sister who owned a starved farm, all chequered of stone fences, in that
-region of breath-taking hills.
-
-It stood my misfortune that I was bred as the son of a wealthy man.
-Columbia was my school and the generosity of my father gilded those
-college days with an allowance of five thousand a year. I became
-proficient--like many another hare-brain--in everything save books, and
-was a notable guard on the University Eleven and pulled the bow oar
-in the University Eight. When I came from college the year before my
-father’s death I could write myself adept of a score of sciences,
-each physical, not one of which might serve to bring a splinter of
-return--not one, indeed, that did not demand the possession of largest
-wealth in its pursuit. I was poor in that I did not have a dollar when
-brought to face the world; I was doubly poor with a training that had
-taught me to spend thousands. Therefore, during the eighteen years to
-succeed my father’s going, was I tossed on the waves of existence
-like so much wreckage; and that I am not still so thrown about is the
-offspring of happy exigency rather than a condition due to wisdom of my
-own.
-
-My ship of money did not come in until after I’d encountered my fortieth
-year. For those eighteen years next prior, if truth must out, I’d picked
-up intermittent small money following the races. Turf interest of
-that day settled about such speedy ones as Goldsmith Maid, Lucy, Judge
-Fullerton and American Girl, while Budd Doble, Dan Mace and Jack Splan
-were more often in the papers than was the President. I followed the
-races, I say; sometimes I was flush of money, more often I was poor; but
-one way or another I clung to the skirts of the circuits and managed to
-live.
-
-Now, since age has come to my head and gold to my fingers, and I’ve had
-time and the cooled blood wherewith to think, I’ve laid my ill courses
-of those eighteen evil years to the doors of what vile ideals of life
-are taught in circles of our very rich. What is true now, was true
-then. Among our “best people”--if “best” be the word where “worst” might
-better fit the case--who is held up to youthful emulation? Is it the
-great lawyer, or writer, or preacher, or merchant, or man of medicine?
-Is it he of any trade or calling who stands usefully and profitably at
-the head of his fellows? Never; such gentry of decent effort and clean
-dollars to flow therefrom are not mentioned; or if they be, it is not
-for compliment and often with disdain.
-
-And who has honor in the social conventions of our American aristocrats?
-It is young A, who drives an automobile some eighty miles an hour; or
-young B, who sails a single-sticker until her canvas is blown from the
-bolt ropes; or young C, who rides like an Arab at polo; or young D,
-who drives farthest at golf; or young E, who is the headlong first in a
-paper chase. These be the ideals; these the promontories to steer by. Is
-it marvel then when a youth raised of those “best circles” falls out
-of his nest of money that he lies sprawling, unable to honestly aid
-himself? Is it strange that he afterward lives drunken and precariously
-and seldom in walks asking industry and hard work? His training has been
-to spend money, while his contempt was reserved for those who labored
-its honorable accumulation. Such wrong-taught creatures, bereft of bank
-accounts, are left to adopt the races, the gambling tables, or the
-wine trade; and with all my black wealth of experience, I sit unable to
-determine which is basest and most loathly of the three.
-
-During those eighteen roving, race-course years I saw my mother but
-seldom; and I never exposed to her my methods of life. I told her that
-I “traveled;” and she, good, innocent girl! gained from the phrase a
-cloudy notion that I went the trusted ambassador to various courts of
-trade of some great manufactory. I protected her from the truth to
-the end, and she died brightly confident that her son made a brilliant
-figure in the world.
-
-While on my ignoble wanderings I kept myself in touch with one whom I
-might trust, and who, dwelling near my mother, saw her day by day. He
-was ever in possession of my whereabouts. Her health was a bit perilous
-from heart troubles, and I, as much as I might, maintained arrangements
-to warn me should she turn seriously ill.
-
-At first I looked hourly for such notice; but as month after month
-went by and no bad tidings--nothing save word at intervals that she was
-passing her quiet, uneventful days in comfort, and as each occasional
-visit made to Westchester confirmed such news, my apprehension became
-dulled and dormant. It was a surprise then, and pierced me hideously,
-when I opened the message that told how her days were down to hours and
-she lay dying.
-
-The telegram reached me in Hartford. When I took it from the messenger’s
-hand I was so poor I could not give him a dime for finding me; and as he
-had been to some detective pains in the business, he left with an ugly
-face as one cheated of appreciation. I could not help it; there dwelt
-not so much as one cheap copper in my pocket. Also, my clothes were none
-of the best; for I’d been in ill fortune, and months of bankruptcy had
-dealt unkindly with my wardrobe. But there should be no such word as
-fail; I must find the money to go to her--find it even though it arrive
-on the tides of robbery.
-
-Luck came to me. Within the minute to follow the summons, and while the
-yellow message still fluttered between my fingers, I was hailed from
-across the street. The hail came from a certain coarse gentleman who
-seemed born to horse-races as to an heritage and was, withal, one of the
-few who reaped a harvest from them. This fortunate one was known to the
-guild as Sure-thing Pete.
-
-It was fairly early of the morning, eight o’clock, and Surething Pete
-in the wake of his several morning drinks--he was a celebrated sot--was
-having his boots cleaned. It is a curious thing that half-drunken folk
-are prone to this improvement. That is why a boot-black’s chair is found
-so frequently just outside the portals of a rum shop. The prospect of
-a seat allures your drunkard fresh from his latest drink; he may sit
-at secure ease and please his rum-contented fancy with a review of the
-passing crowds; also, the Italian digging and brushing about his soles
-gives an impression that he is subject of concern to some one and this
-nurses a sense of importance and comes as vague tickle to his vanity.
-
-Surething Pete, as related, was under the hands of a boot-black when I
-approached. He was much older than I and regarded me as a boy.
-
-“Broke, eh?” said Surething Pete. His eye, though bleary, was keen.
-Then he tendered a quarter. “Take this and go and eat. I’ll wait for you
-here. Come back in fifteen minutes and I’ll put you in line to make some
-money. I’d give you more, but I’m afraid you wouldn’t return.”
-
-Make money! I bolted two eggs and a cup of coffee and was back in ten
-minutes. Surething’s second shoe was receiving its last polish. He
-paid the artist, and then turning led me to a rear room of the nearby
-ginmill.
-
-“This is it,” said Surething. His voice was rum-husky but he made
-himself clear. “There’s the special race between Prince Rupert and
-Creole Belle. You know about that?”
-
-Of course I knew. These cracks had been especially matched against
-each other. It would be a great contest; the odds were five to three on
-Prince Rupert; thousands were being wagered; the fraternity had talked
-of nothing else for three weeks. Of course I knew!
-
-“Well,” went on Surething, “I’ve been put wrong, understand! I’ve got
-my bundle on Creole Belle and stand to win a fortune if Prince Rupert
-is beaten. I supposed that I’d got his driver fixed. I paid this crook
-a thousand cold and gave him tickets on Creole Belle which stand him to
-win five thousand more to throw the race. But now, with the race to be
-called at two o’clock, I get it straight he’s out to double-cross me.
-He’ll drive Rupert to win; an’ if he does I’m a gone fawnskin. But I’ve
-thought of another trick.”
-
-Then suddenly: “I’ll tell you what you do; get into this wagon outside
-and come with me.”
-
-With the last word, Surething again headed for the street. We took
-a carriage that stood at the door. In thirty minutes we were on the
-Charter ‘Oak track. At this early hour, we had the course to ourselves.
-Surething walked up the homestretch until we arrived at a point midway
-between the half mile post and the entrance to the stretch.
-
-“See that tree?” said Surething, and he pointed to a huge buttonwood--a
-native--that stood perhaps twenty feet inside the rail. “Come over and
-take a look at it.”
-
-The great buttonwood was hollow; or rather a half had been torn away
-by some storm. What remained, however, was growing green and strong
-and stood in such fashion towards the course that it offered a perfect
-hiding place. By lying close within the hollow one was screened from any
-who might drive along.
-
-“This is the proposition,” continued Surething, when I had taken in
-the convenient buttonwood and its advantages. “This Rupert can beat the
-Belle if he’s driven. But he’s as nervous as a girl. If a fly should
-light on him he’d go ten feet in the air--understand? Here now is what
-I want of you. I’ll tell you what you’re to do; then I’ll tell you what
-you’re to get. I want you to plant yourself behind this tree--better
-come here as early as the noon hour. The track ’ll be clear and no
-one’ll see you go under cover, understand! As I say, I want you to plant
-yourself in the sheltering hollow of this buttonwood. You ought to
-have three rocks--say as big as a guinea’s egg--three stones, d’ye see,
-’cause the race is heats, best three in five. You must lay dead so no
-one’ll get on. As Rupert and the Belle sweep ’round the curve for the
-stretch, you want to let ’em get a trifle past you. Then you’re to
-step out and nail Rupert--he’ll have the pole without a doubt--and nail
-Rupert, I say, with a rock. That’ll settle him; he’ll be up in the air
-like a swallow-bird. It’ll give the Belle the heat.” Having gotten thus
-far, Surething fell into a mighty fit of coughing; his face congested
-and his eyes rolled. For a moment I feared that apoplexy--my father’s
-death--might take him in the midst of his hopeful enterprise and deprive
-me of this chance of riches. I was not a little relieved therefore when
-he somewhat recovered and went on: “That trick’s as safe as seven-up,”
- continued Surething. “You’ll be alone up here, as everybody else will
-be down about the finish. The drivers, driving like mad, won’t see
-you--won’t see anything but their horses’ ears. You must get Rupert--get
-him three times--every time he comes’round--understand?”
-
-I understood.
-
-“Right you are,” concluded Surething. “And to make it worth your while,
-here are tickets on the Belle that call for five hundred dollars if she
-wins. And here’s a dollar also for a drink and another feed to steady
-your wrists for the stonethrowing.”
-
-It will seem strange and may even attract resentment that I, a college
-graduate and come of good folk, should accept such commission from a
-felon like Surething Pete. All I say is that I did accept it; was glad
-to get it; and for two hours before the great contest between Prince
-Rupert and Creole Belle was called, I lay ensconced in my buttonwood
-ambush, armed of three stones like David without the sling, ready to
-play my part towards the acquirement of those promised hundreds.
-And with that, my thoughts were on my mother. The money would count
-handsomely to procure me proper clothes and take me home. To me the
-proposed bombardment of the nervous Rupert appeared an opportunity
-heaven-sent when my need was most.
-
-For fear of discovery and woe to follow, I put my tickets in the hands
-of one who, while as poor as I, could yet be trusted. He was, if the
-Belle won, to cash them; and should I be observed at my sleight of hand
-work and made to fly, he would meet me in a near-by village with the
-proceeds.
-
-At prompt two o’clock the race was called. There were bustling crowds
-of spectators; but none came near my hiding place, as Surething Pete
-had foreseen. The horses got off with the second trial. They trotted as
-steadily as clockwork. As the pair rounded the second curve they were
-coming like the wind; drivers leaning far forward in their sulkies,
-eagle of glance, steady of rein, soothing with encouraging words, and
-“sending them,” as the phrase is, for every inch. It was a splendid race
-and splendidly driven, with Rupert on the pole and a half length to the
-good. They flashed by my post like twin meteors.
-
-As they passed I stepped free of my buttonwood; and then, as unerringly
-as one might send a bullet--for I had not been long enough from school
-to forget how to throw--my first pebble, full two ounces, caught the
-hurrying Rupert in mid-rib.
-
-Mighty were the results. Prince Rupert leaped into the
-air--stumbled--came almost to a halt--then into the air a second
-time--and following that, went galloping and pitching down the course,
-his driver sawing and whipping in distracted alternation. Meanwhile,
-Creole Belle slipped away like a spirit in harness and finished a wide
-winner. I took in results from my buttonwood. There was no untoward
-excitement about the grandstand or among the judges. Good; I was not
-suspected!
-
-There ensued a long wait; planted close to my tree I wearied with the
-aching length of it. Then Rupert and the Belle were on the track again.
-The gong sounded; I heard the word “Go!” even in my faraway hiding;
-the second heat was on. It was patterned of the first; the two took the
-curve and flew for the head of the stretch as they did before; Rupert on
-the pole and leading with half a length. I repeated the former success.
-The stone struck poor Rupert squarely. He shot straight toward the skies
-and all but fell in the sulky when he came down. It was near to ending
-matters; for Rupert regained his feet in scantiest time to get inside
-the distance flag before the Belle streamed under the wire.
-
-Creole Belle! two straight heats! What a row and a roar went up about
-the pools! What hedging was done! From five to three on Rupert the
-odds shifted to seven to two on Creole Belle. I could hear the riot and
-interpret it. I clung closely to the protecting buttonwood; there was
-still a last act before the play was done.
-
-It was the third heat. The pace, comparatively, was neither hot nor
-hard; the previous exertions of both Rupert and the Belle had worn
-away the wire edge and abated their appetites for any utmost speed.
-Relatively, however, conditions were equal and each as tired as the
-other; and as Rupert was the quicker in the get-away and never failed of
-the pole in the first quarter, the two as they neared me offered the old
-picture of Rupert on the rail and leading by half his length.
-
-Had I owned a better chance of observation, I might have noted as
-Prince Rupert drew near the buttonwood that his mind was not at ease. He
-remembered those two biting flints; they were lessons not lost on
-him. As I stepped from concealment to hurl my last stone, it is to
-be believed that Rupert--his alarmed eyes roving for lions in his
-path--glimpsed me. Certain it is that as the missile flew from my hand,
-Rupert swerved across the track, the hub of his sulky narrowly missing
-the shoulder of the mare.
-
-The sudden shift confused my markmanship, and instead of Rupert, the
-stone smote the driver on the ear and all but swept him from his seat.
-It did the work, however; whether from the stone, the whip, or that
-state of general perturbation wherein his fell experiences had left his
-nerves, Rupert went fairly to pieces. Before he was on his feet again
-and squared away, the Belle had won.
-
-Peeping from my hiding place I could tell that my adroit interference
-in the late contest was becoming the subject of public concern. Rupert’s
-driver, still sitting in his sulky, was holding high his whip in
-professional invocation of the judges’ eyes. And that ill-used horseman
-was talking; at intervals he pointed with the utmost feeling towards my
-butonwood. Nor was his oratory without power; he had not discoursed long
-when amid an abundance of shouts and oaths and brandished canes, one
-thousand gentlemen of the turf were under head in my direction.
-
-It was interesting, but I did not stay in contemplation of the
-spectacle; I out and bolted. I crossed the track and ran straight for
-the end fence. This latter barrier looked somewhat high; I made no essay
-to climb, but, picking a broadest board, launched myself against it,
-shoulder on. The board fell and I was through the gap and in an open
-field.
-
-But why waste time with that hustling hue and cry? It was futile for
-all its indignant energy; I promise you, I made good my distance. Young,
-strung like a harp, with a third of a mile start and able to speed like
-a deer, I ran the hunt out of sight in the first ten minutes. It was all
-earnestness, that flight of mine. I fled through three villages and a
-puny little river that fell across my path. I welcomed the river, for I
-knew it would cool the quest.
-
-Of a verity! I got my money, and my stone throwing was not to be in
-vain. True, the driver and the owner of Rupert both protested, but the
-track statutes were inexorable. The judges could take no cognizance of
-that cannonading from the buttonwood and gave the race--three straight
-heats--to Creole Belle. Surething Pete won his thousands; and as for me,
-my friend and I encountered according to our tryst and he brought me my
-money safe. Within fifteen hours from that time when I dealt disaster to
-Rupert from the sheltering buttonwood, clothed and in respectable tears,
-I was kneeling by my mother’s side and taking what sorrowful joy I
-might for having arrived while she was yet equal to the bestowal of her
-blessing.
-
-*****
-
-It was to be our last evening about the great stone fireplace; the last
-of our stories would be told. The roads were now broken, and though a
-now-and-then upset was more than likely to enliven one’s goings about,
-sleighs and sleds as schemes of conveyance were pronounced to be among
-things possible. As we drew our chairs about the blaze, the jangle of
-an occasional leash of bells showed how some brave spirit was even then
-abroad.
-
-Under these inspiring conditions, the Sour Gentleman and the Red Nosed
-Gentleman declared their purpose of on the morrow pressing for the
-railway station eighteen miles away. To this end they had already
-chartered a sleigh, and the word was out that it be at the Inn door by
-ten of the morning clock.
-
-For myself, nothing was driving me of business or concern, and I was in
-no haste to leave; and the Old Cattleman and his ward, Sioux Sam, were
-also of a mind to abide where they were for a farther day or two at
-least. But the going of the Sour Gentleman and the Red Nosed Gentleman
-would destroy our circle, wherefore we were driven to regard this as
-“our last evening,” and to crown it honorably the Jolly Doctor brewed a
-giant bowl of what he described as punch. The others, both by voice
-and the loyalty wherewith they applied themselves to its disappearance,
-avowed its excellencies, and on that point Sioux Sam and I were content
-to receive their words.
-
-The Red Nosed Gentleman--who had put aside his burgundy in compliment to
-the Jolly Doctor and his punch, and seemed sensibly exhilarated by this
-change of beverage--was the first to give the company a story. It was of
-his younger, green-cloth days, and the title by which he distinguished
-it was “When I Ran the Shotgun.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXIII.--WHEN I RAN THE SHOTGUN.
-
-About this time the city of Providence fell midspasm in a fit of
-civic morality. Communities, like individuals, are prone to starts of
-strenuous virtue, and Providence, bewailing her past iniquities, was
-pushing towards a pure if not a festive life. And because in this new
-mood to be excellent it was the easiest, nearest thing, Providence smote
-upon the gambling brotherhood with the heavy hand of the police. The
-faro games and wheels of roulette were swept away and more than one
-who had shared their feverish profits were sent into captivity. Yea
-forsooth! the gay fraternity of fortune whose staff of life was cards
-found themselves borne upon with the burden of bad days.
-
-For myself I conceived this to be the propitious moment to open a faro
-room of my own. I had been for long of the guild of gamblers yet had
-never soared to the brave heights of proprietorship. I had bucked the
-games, but never dealt them. It came to me as a thought that in the
-beating midst of this moral tempest dwelt my opportunity. Had I chosen
-a day of police apathy--an hour of gambling security--for such a move, I
-would have been set upon by every established proprietor. He would
-have resented my rivalry as a game warden would the intromissions of a
-poacher. And I’d have been wiped out--devoured horn and hide and hoof as
-by a band of wolves.
-
-Under these new conditions of communal virtue, however, and with the
-clan of former proprietors broken and dispersed, the field was free
-of menace from within; I would face no risk more grievous than the
-constabulary. These latter I believed I might for a season avoid;
-particularly if I unveiled my venture in regions new and not theretofore
-the home of such lawless speculation.
-
-Filled with these thoughts, I secured apartments sufficiently obscure
-and smuggled in the paraphernalia under cloud of night. The room was
-small--twenty feet square; there was space for no more than one faro
-table, and with such scant furnishing I went to work. For reasons which
-now escape me I called my place “The Shotgun.”
-
-Heretofore I gave you assurance of the lapse of years since last I
-gambled at any game save the Wall Street game of stocks. I quit cards
-for that they were disreputable and the gains but small. Stocks, on
-the contrary, are endorsed as “respectable;” at stocks one may gamble
-without forfeiture of position; also, there exist no frontiers to the
-profits which a cunning stock plan well executed may bring.
-
-In my old simpler days, I well recall those defences of the pure gambler
-wherein my regard indulged. Elia once separated humanity into two
-tribes--those who borrow and those who lend. In my younger philosophy I
-also saw two septs: those who lose and those who win. To me all men were
-gamblers. Life itself was one continuous game of chance; and the stakes,
-that shelter and raiment and food and drink to compose the body’s
-bulwark against an instant conquest by Death. Of the inherent morality
-of gambling I nurtured no doubts. Or, at the worst, I felt certain of
-its comparative morality when laid beside such commerces as banks and
-markets and fields of plain barter and sale. There is no trade (I said)
-save that of the hands which is held by the tether of any honesty. The
-carpenter sawing boards, the smith who beats out a horseshoe, the
-mason busy with trowel and mortar on sun-blistered scaffolds, hoarsely
-shouting “More bricks!” they in their way of life are honest. They are
-bound to integrity because they couldn’t cheat if they would. But is the
-merchant selling the false for the real--the shoddy for the true--is the
-merchant whose advertisements are as so many false pretences paid for by
-the line--is he more honest than the one who cheats with cards? Is the
-lawyer looking looks of wisdom to hide the emptiness of his ignorance?
-Is the doctor, profound of mien, who shakes portentous head, medicining
-a victim not because he has a malady but because he has a million
-dollars?
-
-And if it become a question of fashion, why then, age in and age out,
-the gambler has been often noble and sometimes royal. In the days of the
-Stuarts, or later among the dull ones of Hanover, was it the peasant or
-the prince who wagered his gold at cards? Why man! every royal court was
-a gambling house; every king, save one--and he disloved and at the
-last insane--a gambler. Are not two-thirds of the homes of our American
-nobility--our folk of millions and Fifth Avenue--replete of faro and
-roulette and the very hotbed of a poisonous bridge whist? Fy, man, fy!
-you who denounce gambling but preach your own plebeianism--proclaim your
-own vulgarity! The gambler has been ever the patrician.
-
-With but one table, whereat I would preside as dealer, I required no
-multitude to man The Shotgun. I called to my aid three gentlemen of
-fortune--seedy and in want they were and glad to earn a dollar. One was
-to be sentinel at the door, one would perch Argus-like on the
-lookout’s stool, while the third,--an old suspicious camp-follower of
-Chance,--kept the case. This latter, cautious man! declined my service
-unless I put steel bars on the only door, and as well on the only
-window. These he conceived to be some safeguard against invasions. They
-were not; but I spent money to put them in place to the end that his
-fluttered nerves be stilled and he won to my standard. And at that, he
-later pursued his business as case-keeper with an ear on the door and
-an eye on the small barred window, sitting the while half aloof from the
-table and pushing the case-buttons as the cards fell from the box with
-a timid forefinger and as though he proposed no further immersion in
-current crime than was absolutely demanded by the duties of his place.
-He sat throughout the games a picture of apprehension.
-
-For myself, and to promote my profits, I gave both my people and my
-customers every verbal bond of safety. The story went abroad that I was
-“protected;” that no wolf of the police dared so much as glance at flock
-of mine. The Shotgun was immune of arrest, so ran the common tale, and
-as much as leer and look and smile and shrug of shoulder might furnish
-them I gave the story wings.
-
-This public theory of safety was necessary to success. In the then
-hectic conditions, and briskly in the rear of a stern suppression of
-resorts that had flourished for decades unshaken of the law, wanting
-this feeling of security there would have come not one dollar to take
-its hopeful chances at The Shotgun. As it was, however, the belief that
-I lived amply “protected” took prompt deep root. And the fact that
-The Shotgun opened in the face of storms which smote without pity upon
-others, was itself regarded as proof beyond dispute. No one would
-court such dangers unless his footing were as unshakable as Gibraltar.
-Thereupon folk with a heart for faro came blithely and stood four deep
-about my one table; vast was the business I accomplished and vast were
-the sums changed in. And behold! I widely prospered.
-
-When I founded The Shotgun, I was richer of hope than of money; but
-fortune smiled and within a fortnight my treasure was told by thousands.
-Indeed, my patrons played as play those who are starved to gamble; that
-recess of faro enforced of the police had made them hawk-hungry. And my
-gains rolled in.
-
-While I fostered the common thought that no interference of the law
-would occur and The Shotgun was sacred ground, I felt within my own
-breast a sense of much unsafety. Damocles with his sword--hung of a hair
-and shaken of a breeze--could have been no more eaten of unease. I knew
-that I was wooing disaster, challenging a deepest peril. The moment The
-Shotgun became a part of police knowledge, I was lost.
-
-Still, I dealt on; the richness of my rewards the inducement and the
-optimism of the born gambler giving me courage to proceed. It fed my
-vanity, too, and hugely pleased my pride to be thus looked upon as
-eminent in my relations with the powers that ruled. They were proud,
-even though parlous days, those days when I ran The Shotgun.
-
-While I walked the field of my enterprise like a conqueror, I was not
-without the prudence that taketh account in advance and prepareth for a
-fall. Aside from the table whereon dwelt the layout, box and check rack,
-and those half-dozen chairs which encircled it, the one lone piece of
-furniture which The Shotgun boasted was a rotund lounge. Those who
-now and then reposed themselves thereon noted and denounced its nard
-unfitness. There was neither softness nor spring to that lounge; to sit
-upon it was as though one sat upon a Saratoga trunk. But it was in
-a farthest corner and distant as much as might be from the game; and
-therefore there arose but few to try its indurated merits and complain.
-
-That lounge of unsympathetic seat was my secret--my refuge--my last
-resort. I alone was aware of its construction; and that I might be thus
-alone, I had been to hidden and especial pains to bring it from New York
-myself. That lounge was no more, no less than a huge, capacious box.
-You might lift the seat and it would open like a trunk. Within was ample
-room for one to lie at length. Once in one could let down the cover and
-lock it on the inside; that done, there again it stood to the casual
-eye, a lounge, nothing save a lounge and neither hint nor token of the
-fugitive within.
-
-My plan to save myself when the crash should come was plain and sure.
-There were but two lights--gas jets, both--in The Shotgun; these were
-immediately above the table, low hung and capped with green shades to
-save the eyes of players. The light was reflected upon the layout;
-all else was in the shadow. This lack of light was no drawback to my
-popularity. Your folk who gamble cavil not at shadows for themselves so
-long as cards and deal-box are kept strongly in the glare. In event of
-a raid, it was my programme to extinguish the two lights--a feat easily
-per-formable from the dealer’s chair--and seizing the money in the
-drawer, grope my way under cover of darkness for that excellent lounge
-and conceal myself. It would be the work of a moment; the folk would be
-huddled about the table and not about the lounge; the time lost by the
-police while breaking through those defences of bars and bolts would be
-more than enough.
-
-By the time the lights were again turned on and the Goths in possession,
-I would have disappeared. No one would know how and none know where.
-When the blue enemy, despairing of my apprehension, had at last
-withdrawn with what prisoners had been made, I would be left alone. I
-might then uncover myself and take such subsequent flight as best became
-my liberty and its continuance.
-
-Often I went over this plan in my thoughts--a fashion of mental
-rehearsal, as it were--and the more I considered the more certain I
-became that when the pinch arrived it would not fail. As I’ve stated,
-none shared with me my secret of that hinged and hollow couch; it was
-my insurance--my cave of retreat in any tornado of the law; and the
-knowledge thereof steadied me and aided my courage to compose those airs
-of cheerful confidence which taught others safety and gave countenance
-to the story of my unqualified and sure “protection!” Alas! for the hour
-that unmasked me; from that moment The Shotgun fell away; my stream
-of golden profits ran dry; from a spectacle of reverence and respect I
-became the nine-day byword of my tribe!
-
-It was a crowded, thriving midnight at The Shotgun. I had been running
-an uninterrupted quartette of months; and having had good luck to the
-point of miracles, my finances were flourishing with five figures
-in their plethoric count. From a few poor hundreds, my “roll” when I
-snapped the rubber band about it and planted it deep within the safety
-of my pocket, held over fifty thousand dollars. Quite a fortune; and so
-I thought myself.
-
-It was, I repeat, a busy, winning midnight at The Shotgun. There were
-doubtless full forty visitors in the cramped room. These were crowded
-about the table, for the most part playing, reaching over each other’s
-shoulders or under each other’s elbows, any way and every way to get
-their wagers on the layout. I was dealing, while to right and left sat
-my henchmen of the lookout and the case.
-
-As on every evening, I lived on the feather-edge of apprehension,
-fearing a raid. My eye might be on the thirteen cards and the little
-fortunes they carried, but my ear was ever alert for a first dull
-footfall that would tell of destruction on its lowering way.
-
-There had been four hours of brisk, remunerative play--for the game
-began at eight--when, in the middle of a deal, there came the rush of
-heavy feet and a tumult of stumblings and blunderings on the stair.
-It was as if folk unaccustomed to the way--it being pitch dark on the
-stairway for caution’s sake--and in vast eagerness to reach the door,
-had tripped and fallen. Also, if one might judge from the uproar and
-smothered, deep profanity of many voices there were a score engaged.
-
-To my quick intelligence, itself for long on the rack of expectancy and
-therefore doubly keen, there seemed but one answer to the question, of
-that riot on the stair. It was the police; the Philistines were upon me;
-my gold mine of The Shotgun had become the target of a raid!
-
-It was the labor of an instant. With both hands I turned out the lights;
-then stuffing my entire fortune into my pockets I began to push through
-the ranks of bewildered gentlemen who stood swearing in frightened
-undertones expecting evil. Silently and with a cat’s stealth, I found my
-way in the pitch blackness to the lounge. As I had foreseen, no one was
-about it to discover or to interfere. Softly I raised the cover; in a
-moment I was within. Lying on my side for comfort’s sake, I again turned
-ear to passing events. I had locked the lounge and believed myself
-insured.
-
-Meanwhile, within the room and in the hall beyond my grated door, the
-tumult gathered and grew. There came various exclamations.
-
-“Who doused those glims?”
-
-“Light up, somebody.”
-
-Also, there befell a volley of blows and kicks and thumps on The
-Shotgun’s iron portals; and gruff commands:
-
-“Open the door!”
-
-Then some one produced a match and relighted the gas. I might tell that
-by a ray about the size and color of a wheat-straw which suddenly bored
-its yellow way through a hole in my shelter. The clamor still proceeded
-at the door; it seemed to augment.
-
-Since there could be no escape--for every soul saw himself caught like a
-rat in a trap--the door was at last unbarred and opened, desperately. Of
-what avail would it be to force the arresting party to break its way? In
-despair the door was thrown wide and each of those within braced himself
-to meet his fate. After all, to visit a gambling place was not the
-great crime; the cornered ones might feel fairly secure. It was the
-“proprietor” for whom the law kept sharpest tooth!
-
-When the door opened, it opened to the admission of a most delightful
-disappointment. There appeared no police; no grim array of those
-sky-hued watch-dogs of the city’s peace and order rushed through
-in search of quarry. Instead came innocently, deviously, and with
-uncertain, shuffling steps, five separate drunken gentlemen. There
-had been a dinner; they had fed deeply, drunk deeply; it was now their
-pleasure to relax themselves at play. That was all; they had sought The
-Shotgun with the best of motives; the confusion on the stair was the
-offspring of darkness and drink when brought to a conjunction. Now they
-were within, and reading in the faces about them--even through the mists
-of their condition--the terrors their advent inspired, the visiting
-sots were much abashed; they stood silent, and like the lamb before the
-shearer, they were dumb and opened not their mouths.
-
-But discovering a danger past, the general mood soon changed. There was
-a space of tacit staring; then came a rout of laughter. Every throat,
-lately so parched, now shouted with derision. The common fear became the
-common jeer.
-
-Then up started the surprised question:
-
-“Where’s Jack?”
-
-It had origin with one to be repeated by twenty.
-
-“Where’s Jack?”
-
-The barred window was still barred; I had not gone through the door; how
-had I managed my disappearance? It was witchery!--or like the flitting
-of a ghost! Even in my refuge I could feel the awe and the chill that
-began to creep about my visitors as they looked uneasily and repeated,
-as folk who touch some graveyard mystery:
-
-“Where’s Jack?”
-
-There was no help; fate held me in a corner and never a crack of escape!
-Shame-faced, dust-sprinkled and perspiring like a harvest hand--for my
-hiding place was not Nova Zembla--I threw back the top of the lounge and
-stood there--the image of confusion--the “man with a pull”--the ally
-of the powers--the “protected” proprietor of The Shotgun! There was a
-moment of silence; and next fell a whirlwind of mirth.
-
-There is no argument for saying more. I was laughed out of Providence
-and into New York. The Shotgun was laughed out of existence. And with
-it all, I too, laughed; for was it not good, even though inadvertent
-comedy? Also, was it not valuable comedy to leave me better by half a
-hundred thousand dollars--that comedy of The Shotgun? And thereupon,
-while I closed my game, I opened my mouth widely and laughed with the
-others. In green-cloth circles the story is still told; and whenever
-I encounter a friend of former days, I’m inevitably recalled to my
-lounge-holdout and that midnight stampede of The Shotgun.
-
-*****
-
-“That’s where the west,” observed the Old Cattleman, who had given
-delighted ear to the Red Nosed Gentleman’s story, “that’s where the
-west has the best of the east. In Arizona a passel of folks engaged
-in testin’ the demerits of farobank ain’t runnin’ no more resks of the
-constables than they be of chills an’ fever.”
-
-“There are laws against gambling in the west?” This from the Jolly
-Doctor.
-
-“Shore, thar’s laws.”
-
-“Why, then, aren’t they enforced?”
-
-“This yere’s the reason,” responded the Old Cattleman. “Thar’s so much
-more law than force, that what force exists is wholly deevoted to a
-round-up of rustlers an’ stage hold-ups an’ sech. Besides, it’s the
-western notion to let every gent skin his own eel, an’ the last thing
-thought of is to protect you from yourse’f. No kyard sharp can put a
-crimp in you onless you freely offers him a chance, an’ if you-all is
-willin’, why should the public paint for war? In the east every gent is
-tryin’ to play some other gent’s hand; not so in that tolerant
-region styled the west. Which it ain’t too much to say that folks get
-killed--an’ properly--in the west for possessin’ what the east calls
-virchoos.” And here the Old Cattleman shook his head sagely over a
-western superiority. “The east mixes itse’f too much in a gent’s private
-affairs. Now if Deef Smith an’ Colonel Morton” he concluded, “had
-ondertook to pull off their dooel in the east that Texas time, the east
-would have come down on ’em like a failin’ star an’ squelched it.”
-
-“And what was this duel you speak of?” asked the Sour Gentleman. “I, for
-one, would be most ready to hear the story.1’
-
-“Which it’s the story of ‘When the Capitol Was Moved.’”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXIV.--WHEN THE CAPITOL WAS MOVED.
-
-When the joobilant Texans set down to kyarve out the destinies of that
-empire they wrests from the feeble paws of the Mexicans an’ Santa Anna,
-they decides on Austin for the Capitol an’ Old Houston to be President.
-An’ I’ll say right yere, Old Houston, by all roomer an’ tradition, is
-mighty likely the most presidential president that ever keeps a republic
-guessin’ as to whatever is he goin’ to do next. Which he’s as full of
-surprises as a night in Red Dog.
-
-About the first dash outen the box, Old Houston gets himse’f into
-trouble with two Lone Star leadin’ citizens whose names, respective, is
-Colonel Morton an’ jedge Webb.
-
-Old Houston himse’f on the hocks of them vict’ries he partic’pates in,
-an’ bein’ selected president like I say, grows as full of vanity as
-a prairie dog. Shore! he’s a hero; the drawback is that his notion of
-demeanin’ himse’f as sech is to spread his tail feathers an’ strut.
-Old Houston gets that puffed up, an’ his dignity is that egreegious, he
-feels crowded if a gent tries to walk on the same street with him.
-
-Colonel Morton an’ Jedge Webb themse’fs wades through that carnage from
-soda to hock freein’ Texas, an’ they sort o’ figgers that these yere
-services entitles them to be heard some. Old Houston, who’s born with a
-notion that he’s doo’ to make what public uproar every o’casion demands,
-don’t encourage them two patriots. He only listens now an’ then to
-Morton; an’ as for Jedge Webb, he jest won’t let that jurist talk at
-all.
-
-“An’ for these yere followin’ reasons to wit,” explains Old Houston,
-when some Austin sports puts it to him p’lite, but steadfast, that he’s
-onjust to Webb. “I permits Morton to talk some, because it don’t make a
-splinter of difference what Morton says. He can talk on any side of any
-subject an’ no one’s ediot enough to pay the least attention to them
-remarks. But this sityooation is changed when you-all gets to Webb. He’s
-a disaster. Webb never opens his mouth without subtractin’ from the sum
-total of hooman knowledge.”
-
-[Illustration: 0369]
-
-When Morton hears of them remarks he re-gyards himse’f as wronged.
-
-“An’ if Old Houston,” observes Morton, who’s a knife fighter an’ has
-sliced offensive gents from time to time; “an’ if Old Houston ain’t more
-gyarded in his remarks, I’ll take to disapprovin’ of his conduct with a
-bowie.”
-
-As I intimates, Old Houston is that pride-blown that you-all couldn’t
-stay on the same range where he is. An’ he’s worried to a standstill for
-a openin’ to onload on the Texas public a speciment of his dignity. At
-last, seein’ the chances comin’ some slow, he ups an’ constructs the
-opportunity himse’f.
-
-Old Houston’s home-camp, that a-way, is at a hamlet named Washin’ton
-down on the Brazos. It’s thar he squanders the heft of his leesure when
-not back of the game as President over to Austin. Thar’s a clause in
-the constitootion which, while pitchin’ onto Austin as the public’s
-home-ranche or capitol, permits the President in the event of perils
-onforeseen or invasions or sech, to round up the archives an’ move the
-capitol camp a whole lot. Old Houston, eager to be great, seizes onto
-this yere tenet.
-
-“I’ll jest sort o’ order the capitol to come down, yere where I live
-at,” says Old Houston, “an’ tharby call the waverin’ attention of the
-Lone Star public to who I be.”
-
-As leadin’ up to this atrocity an’ to come within the constitootion,
-Old Houston allows that Austin is menaced by Comanches. Shore, it
-ain’t menaced none; Austin would esteem the cleanin’ out of that
-entire Comanche tribe as the labors of a holiday. But it fills into Old
-Houston’s hand to make this bluff as a excuse. An’ with that, he issues
-the order to bring the whole gov’ment layout down to where he lives.
-
-No, as I tells you-all before, Austin ain’t in no more danger of
-Comanches than she is of j’inin’ the church. Troo, these yere rannikaboo
-savages does show up in paint an’ feathers over across the Colorado once
-or twice; but beyond a whoop or two an’ a little permiscus shootin’ into
-town which nobody minds, them vis’tations don’t count.
-
-To give you-all gents a idee how little is deemed of Comanches by them
-Texas forefathers, let me say a word of Bill Spence who keeps a store
-in Austin. Bill’s addin’ up Virg Horne’s accounts one afternoon in his
-books.
-
-“One pa’r of yaller-top, copper-toe boots for Virg, joonior, three
-dollars; one red cal’co dress for Missis Virg, two dollars,” goes on
-Bill.
-
-At this epock Bill hears a yowl; glancin’ out of the winder, he counts a
-couple of hundred Injuns who’s proselytin’ about over on t’other side of
-the river. Bill don’t get up none; he jests looks annoyed on account of
-that yellin’ puttin’ him out in his book-keepin’.
-
-As a bullet from them savages comes singin’ in the r’ar door an’ buries
-itse’f in a ham, Bill even gets incensed.
-
-“Hiram,” he calls to his twelve-year old son, who’s down cellar drawin’
-red-eye for a customer; “Hiram, you-all take pop’s rifle, raise the
-hindsight for three hundred yards, an’ reprove them hostiles. Aim low,
-Hiram, an’ if you fetches one, pop’ll give you a seegyar an’ let you
-smoke it yourse’f.”
-
-Bill goes back to Virg Horne’s account, an’ Hiram after slammin’ away
-with Bill’s old Hawkins once or twice comes in an’ gets his seegyar.
-
-No; Old Houston does wrong when he flings forth this yere ukase about
-movin’ the capitol. Austin, even if a gent does have to dodge a arrer
-or duck a bullet as he prosecootes his daily tasks, is as safe as a
-camp-meetin’.
-
-When Old Houston makes the order, one of his Brazos pards reemonstrates
-with him.
-
-“Which Austin will simply go into the air all spraddled out,” says this
-pard.
-
-“If Austin sails up in the air an’ stays thar,” says Old Houston, “still
-you-all can gamble that this yere order goes.”
-
-“You hears,” says another, “Elder Peters when he tells of how a Mexican
-named Mohammed commands the mountain to come to him? But the mountain
-calls his bluff; that promontory stands pat, an’ Mohammed has to go to
-the mountain.”
-
-“My name’s Sam Houston an’ it ain’t Mo-hommed,” retorts Old Houston.
-“Moreover, Mohammed don’t have no written constitootion.”
-
-Nacherally, when Austin gets notice of Old Houston’s plan, that
-meetropolis r’ars back an’ screams. The faro-bank folks an’ the tavern
-folks is speshul malignant, an’ it ain’t no time before they-all
-convenes a meetin’ to express their views on Old Houston. Morton an’
-Jedge Webb does the oratory. An’ you hear me! that assembly is shore
-sultry. Which the epithets they applies to Old Houston kills the grass
-for twenty rods about.
-
-Austin won’t move.
-
-Austin resolves to go to war first; a small army is organized with
-Morton in command to gyard the State House an’ the State books that
-a-way, an’ keep Old Houston from romancin’ over an’ packin’ ’em off a
-heap.
-
-Morton is talkin’ an’ Webb is presidin’ over this yere
-convocation--which the said meetin’ is that large an’ enthoosiastic it
-plumb chokes up the hall an’ overflows into the street--when all of a
-sudden a party comes swingin’ through the open winder from the top of
-a scrub-oak that grows alongside the buildin’, an’ drops light as a
-cat onto the platform with Morton an’ Webb. At this yere interruption,
-affairs comes to a halt, an’ the local sports turns in to consider an’
-count up the invader.
-
-This gent who swoops through the winder is dark, big, bony an’ tall; his
-ha’r is lank an’ long as the mane of a hoss; his eyes is deep an’ black;
-his face, tanned like a Injun’s, seems hard as iron. He’s dressed
-in leather from foretop to fetlock, is shod with a pa’r of Comanche
-moccasins, an’ besides a ’leven inch knife in his belt, packs a rifle
-with a 48-inch bar’l. It will weigh twenty pounds, an’ yet this stranger
-handles it like it’s a willow switch.
-
-As this darksome gent lands in among Morton an’ Webb, he stands thar
-without sayin’ a word. Webb, on his part, is amazed, while Morton
-glowers.
-
-“Whatever do you-all regyard as a market price for your skelp?’” says
-Morton to the black interloper, at the same time loosenin’ his knife.
-
-The black stranger makes no reply; his hand flashes to his bowie, while
-his face still wears its iron look.
-
-Webb, some hurried, pushes in between Morton an’ the black stranger.
-Webb is more for peace an’ don’t believe in beginnin’ negotiations with
-a knife.
-
-Webb dictates a passel of p’lite queries to this yere black stranger.
-Tharupon, the black stranger bows p’lite an’ formal, an’ goin’ over to
-the table writes down in good English, “I’m deef an’ dumb.” Next, he
-searches outen his war-bags a letter. It’s from Old Houston over on the
-Brazos. Old Houston allows that onless Austin comes trailin’ in with
-them records within three days, he’ll ride over a whole lot an’ make the
-round-up himse’f. Old Houston declar’s that Austin by virchoo of them
-Comanches is as on-safe as a Christian in Mississippi, an’ he don’t aim
-to face no sech dangers while performin’ his dooties as President of the
-Commonwealth.
-
-After the black stranger flings the letter on the table, he’s organizin’
-to go out through the winder ag’in. But Morton sort o’ detains him.
-Morton writes on the paper that now the black stranger is through his
-dooties as a postman, he will, if he’s a dead game sport, stay over a
-day, an’ him an’ Morton will entertain themse’fs by pullin’ off a war of
-their own. The idee strikes the black stranger as plenty good, an’
-while his face still wears its ca’m, hard look, he writes onder Morton’s
-bluff:
-
-“Rifles; no’th bank of the Colorado; sun-down, this evenin’.”
-
-The next moment he leaps from the platform to the winder an’ from thar
-to the ground, an’ is gone.
-
-“But Colonel Morton,” reemonstrates Webb, who’s some scand’lized at
-Morton hookin’ up for blood with this yere black stranger; “you-all
-shorely don’t aim to fight this party? He’s deef an’ dumb, which is next
-to bein’ locoed outright. Moreover, a gent of your standin’ can’t afford
-to go ramblin’ about, lockin’ horns with every on-known miscreant who
-comes buttin’ in with a missif from President Houston, an’ then goes
-stampedin’ through a winder by way of exit.”
-
-“Onknown!” retorts Morton. “That letterpackin’ person is as well known
-as the Rio Grande. That’s Deef Smith.”
-
-“Colonel Morton,” observes Webb, some horrified when he learns the name
-of the black stranger, “this yere Deef Smith is a shore shot. They
-say he can empty a Comanche saddle four times in five at three hundred
-yards.”
-
-“That may be as it may,” returns Morton. “If I downs him, so much the
-more credit; if he gets me, at the worst I dies by a famous hand.”
-
-The sun is restin’ on the sky-line over to the west. Austin has done
-crossed the Colorado an’ lined up to witness this yere dooel. Deef Smith
-comes ridin’ in from some’ers to the no’th, slides outen the saddle,
-pats his hoss on the neck, an’ leaves him organized an’ ready fifty
-yards to one side. Then Deef Smith steps to the center an’ touches his
-hat, mil’tary fashion, to Morton an’ Webb.
-
-These yere cavaliers is to shoot it out at one hundred yards. As they
-takes their places, Morton says:
-
-“Jedge Webb, if this Deef Smith party gets me, as most like he will,
-send my watch to my mother in Looeyville.”
-
-Then they fronts each other; one in brown leather, the other in cloth
-as good as gold can buy. No one thinks of any difference between ’em,
-however, in a day when courage is the test of aristocracy.
-
-Since one gent can’t hear, Webb is to give the word with a handkerchief.
-At the first flourish the rifles fall to a hor’zontal as still
-an’ steady as a rock. Thar’s a brief pause; then Webb drops his
-handkerchief.
-
-Thar is a crack like one gun; Deef Smith’s hat half turns on his head
-as the bullet cuts it, while Morton stands a moment an’ then, without
-a sound, falls dead on his face. The lead from Deef Smith’s big rifle
-drills him through the heart. Also, since it perforates that gold
-repeater, an’ as the blood sort o’ clogs the works, the Austin folks
-decides it’s no use to send it on to Looeyville, but retains it that
-a-way as a keepsake.
-
-With the bark of the guns an’ while the white smoke’s still hangin’ to
-mark the spot where he stands, Deef Smith’s hoss runs to him like a
-dog. The next instant Deef Smith is in the saddle an’ away. It’s jest
-as well. Morton’s plenty pop’lar with the Austin folks an’ mebby some
-sharp, in the first hysteria of a great loss, overlooks what’s doo to
-honor an’ ups an’ plugs this yere Deef Smith.
-
-*****
-
-The Old Cattleman made a long halt as indicative that his story was at
-an end. There was a moment of silence, and then the Jolly Doctor spoke
-up.
-
-“But how about the books and papers?” asked the Jolly Doctor.
-
-“Oh, nothin’ partic’lar,” said the Old Cattleman. “It turns out like Old
-Houston prophesies. Three days later, vain an’ soopercilious, he rides
-in, corrals them archives, an’ totes ’em haughtily off to the Brazos.”
-
-Following the Old Cattleman’s leaf from Lone Star annals, the Sour
-Gentleman prepared himself to give us his farewell page from the
-unwritten records of the Customs.
-
-“On this, our last evening,” observed the Sour Gentleman, “it seems the
-excellent thing to tell you what was practically my final act of service
-or, if you will, disservice with the Customs. We may call the story ‘How
-the Filibusterer Sailed.’”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXV.--HOW THE FILIBUSTERER SAILED.
-
-It will come to you as strange, my friends, to hear objection--as
-though against an ill trait--to that open-handed generosity which
-is held by many to be among the marks of supreme virtue. Generosity,
-whether it be evidenced by gifts of money, of sympathy, of effort or of
-time, is only another word for weakness. If one were to go into careful
-consideration of the life-failure of any man, it would be found most
-often that his fortunes were slain by his generosity; and while, without
-consideration, he gave to others his countenance, his friendship, his
-money, his toil or whatever he conferred, he in truth but parted with
-his own future--with those raw materials wherewith he would otherwise
-have fashioned a victorious career. Generosity, in a commonest
-expression, is giving more than one receives; it is to give two hundred
-and get one hundred; he is blind, therefore, who does not see that any
-ardor of generosity would destroy a Rothschild.
-
-From birth, and as an attribute inborn, I have been ever too quick to
-give. For a first part of my life at least, and until I shackled
-my impulse of liberality, I was the constant victim of that natural
-readiness. And I was cheated and swindled with every rising sun. I gave
-friendship and took pretense; I parted with money for words; ever I
-rendered the real and received the false, and sold the substance for the
-shadow to any and all who came pleasantly to smile across my counter.
-I was not over-old, however, when these dour truths broke on me, and I
-began to teach myself the solvent beauty of saying “No.”
-
-During those months of exile--for exile it was--which I spent in
-Washington Square, I cultivated misanthropy--a hardness of spirit;
-almost, I might say, I fostered a hatred of my fellow man. And more or
-less I had success. I became owner of much stiffness of sentiment and a
-proneness to be practical; and kept ever before me like a star that, no
-matter how unimportant I might be to others, to myself at least I was
-most important of mankind. Doubtless, I lost in grace by such studies;
-but in its stead I succeeded to safety, and when we are at a final word,
-we live by what we keep and die by what we quit, and of all loyalties
-there’s no loyalty like loyalty to one’s self.
-
-While I can record a conquest of my generosity and its subjugation to
-lines of careful tit-for-tat, there were other emotions against which
-I was unable to toughen my soul. I became never so redoubtable that I
-could beat off the assaults of shame; never so puissant of sentiment but
-I was prey to regrets. For which weaknesses, I could not think on the
-affairs of The Emperor’s Cigars and The German Girl’s Diamonds, nor on
-the sordid money I pouched as their fruits, without the blush mounting;
-nor was I strong enough to consider the latter adventure and escape a
-stab of sore remorse. Later could I have found the girl I would have
-made her restitution. Even now I hear again that scream which reached me
-on the forward deck of the “Wolfgang” that September afternoon.
-
-But concerning the Cuban filibusterer, his outsailing against Spain; and
-the gold I got for his going--for these I say, I never have experienced
-either confusion or sorrow. My orders were to keep him in; I opened the
-port’s gate and let him out; I pocketed my yellow profits. And under
-equal conditions I would do as much again. It was an act of war against
-Spain; yet why should one shrink from one’s interest for a reason like
-that? Where was the moral wrong? Nations make war; and what is right for
-a country, is right for a man. That is rock-embedded verity, if one will
-but look, and that which is dishonest for an individual cannot be honest
-for a flag. You may--if you so choose--make war on Spain, and with
-as much of justice as any proudest people that ever put to sea. The
-question of difference is but a question of strength; and so you be
-strong enough you’ll be right enough, I warrant! For what says the
-poet?
-
- “Right follows might
- Like tail follows kite.”
-
-It is a merest truism; we hear it in the storm; the very waves are its
-witnesses. Everywhere and under each condition, it is true. The proof
-lies all about. We read it on every page of history; behold it when
-armies overthrow a throne or the oak falls beneath the axe of the
-woodman. Do I disfavor war? On the contrary, I approve it as an
-institution of greatest excellence. War slays; war has its blood. But
-has peace no victims? Peace kills thousands where war kills tens; and if
-one is to consider misery, why then there be more starvation, more cold,
-more pain, and more suffering in one year of New York City peace than
-pinched and gnawed throughout the whole four years of civil war. And
-human life is of comparative small moment. We say otherwise; we believe
-otherwise; but we don’t act otherwise. Action is life’s text. Humanity
-is itself the preacher; in that silent sermon of existence--an existence
-of world’s goods and their acquirement--we forever show the thing of
-least consequence to be the life of man. However, I am not myself to
-preach, I who pushed forth to tell a story. It is the defect of age to
-be garrulous, and as one’s power to do departs, its place is ever taken
-by a weakness to talk.
-
-This filibusterer whom I liberated to sail against Spain, I long ago
-told you was called Ryan. That, however, is a fictitious name; there was
-a Ryan, and the Spaniards took his life at Santiago. And because he with
-whom I dealt was also put up against a wall and riddled with Spanish
-lead, and further, because it is not well to give his true name, I call
-him Ryan now. His ship rode on her rope in New York bay; I was given the
-Harriet Lane to hold him from sailing away; his owners ashore--merchants
-these and folk on ’change--offered me ten thousand dollars; the gold
-was in bags, forty pounds of it; I turned my back at evening and in the
-morning he was gone.
-
-You have been told how I never thought on those adventures of The
-Emperor’s Cigars, and The German Girl’s Diamonds, without sensations of
-shame, and pain. Indeed! they were engagements of ignobility! Following
-the latter affair I felt a strongest impulse to change somewhat my
-occupation. I longed for an employment a bit safer and less foul. I
-counted my fortunes; I was rich with over seventy thousand dollars; that
-might do, even though I gained no more. And so it fell that I was almost
-ready to leave the Customs, and forswear and, if possible, forget, those
-sins I had helped commit in its name.
-
-In the former days, my home tribe was not without consequence in Old
-Dominion politics. And while we could not be said to have strengthened
-ourselves by that part we took against the Union, still, now that peace
-was come, the family began little by little to regather a former weight.
-It had enough at this time to interfere for my advantage and rescue me
-from my present duty. I was detailed from Washington to go secretly to
-Europe, make the careless tour of her capitols, and keep an eye alive to
-the interests of both the Treasury and the State Department.
-
-It was a gentleman’s work; this loafing from London to Paris, and from
-Paris to Berlin, with an occasional glance into Holland and its diamond
-cutting. And aside from expenses--which were paid by the government--I
-drew two salaries; one from the Customs and a second from the Secret
-Service. My business was to detect intended smuggling and cable the
-story, to the end that Betelnut Jack and Lorns and Quin and the others
-make intelligent seizures when the smugglers came into New York. The
-better to gain such news, I put myself on closest terms--and still keep
-myself a secret--with chief folk among houses of export; I went about
-with them, drank with them, dined with them; and I wheedled and lay in
-ambush for information of big sales. I sent in many a good story; and
-many a rich seizure came off through my interference. Also I lived
-vastly among legation underlings, and despatched what I found to the
-Department of State. There was no complaint that I didn’t earn my money
-from either my customs or my secret service paymaster. In truth! I stood
-high in their esteem.
-
-At times, too, I was baffled. There was a lady, the handsome wife of
-a diamond dealer in Maiden Lane. She came twice a year to Europe.
-Obviously and in plain view--like the vulgarian she was not--this
-beautiful woman, as she went aboard ship in New York, would wear at
-throat and ears and on her hands full two hundred thousand dollars’
-worth of stones--apparently. And there they seemed to be when she
-returned; and, of course, never a dime of duty. We were morally sure
-this beautiful woman was a beautiful smuggler; we were morally sure
-those stones were paste when she sailed from New York; we were morally
-sure they were genuine, of purest water, when she returned; we were
-morally sure the shift was made in Paris, and that a harvest of
-thousands was garnered with every trip. But what might we do? We had no
-proof; we could get none; we could only guess.
-
-And there were other instances when we slipped. More than once I tracked
-a would-be smuggler to his ship and saw him out of port. And yet, when
-acting on my cables, the smuggler coming down the New York gang-plank
-was snapped up by my old comrades and searched, nothing was found.
-This mystery, for mystery it was, occurred a score of times. At last
-we learned the trick. The particular room occupied by the smuggler was
-taken both ways for a round dozen trips ahead. There were seven members
-of the smuggling combine. When one left the room, his voyage ended, and
-came ashore in New York, another went duly aboard and took possession
-for the return trip. The diamonds had not gone ashore. They were hidden
-in a sure place somewhere about the room; he who took it to go to Europe
-knew where. And in those several times to follow when the outgoer was on
-and off the boat before she cleared, he found no difficulty in carrying
-the gems ashore. The Customs folk aren’t watching departures; their
-vigilance is for those who arrive. However, after a full score of
-defeats, we solved this last riddle, and managed a seizure which lost
-the rogues what profits they had gathered on all the trips before.
-
-Also, as I pried about the smuggling industry, I came across more
-than one interesting bit of knowledge. I found a French firm making
-rubies--actual rubies. It was a great secret in my time, though more
-is known of it now. The ruby was real; stood every test save the one
-test--a hard one to enforce--of specific gravity. The made ruby was a
-shadow lighter, bulk for bulk, than the true ruby of the mines.
-This made ruby was called the “scientific ruby;” and indeed! it was
-scientific to such a degree of delusion that the best experts were for
-long deceived and rubies which cost no more than two hundred dollars to
-make, were sold for ten thousand dollars.
-
-As a curious discovery of my ramblings, I stumbled on a diamond, the one
-only of its brood. It was small, no more than three-quarters of a carat.
-But of a color pure orange and--by day or by night--blazing like a spark
-of fire. That stone if lost could be found; it is the one lone member of
-its orange house. What was its fate? Set in the open mouth of a little
-lion’s head, one may now find it on the finger of a prince of the
-Bourse.
-
-It was while in Madrid, during my European hunting, that those seeds
-were sown which a few months later grew into a smart willingness to let
-down the bars for my filibusterer’s escape. I was by stress of duty held
-a month in Madrid. And, first to last, I heard nothing from the natives
-when they spoke of America but malediction and vilest epithet. It kept
-me something warm, I promise, for all I had once ridden saber in hand to
-smite that same American government hip and thigh. I left Madrid when my
-work was done with never a moment’s delay; and I carried away a profound
-hate for Spain and all things Spanish.
-
-As I was brought home by commands from my superiors at the end of my
-Madrid work, these anti-Spanish sentiments had by no means cooled when I
-made the New York wharf. Decidedly if I’d been searched for a sentiment,
-I would have been discovered hostile to Spanish interest when, within
-three weeks following my home-coming, I was given the Harriet Lane,
-shown the suspect and his ship, and told to have a sleepless eye and
-seize him if he moved.
-
-It’s the Norse instinct to hate Spain; and I was blood and lineage,
-decisively Norse. That affair of instinct is a mighty matter. It is
-curious to note how one’s partisanship will back-track one’s racial
-trail and pick up old race feuds and friendships; hating where one’s
-forbears hated, loving where they loved. Even as a child, being then a
-devourer of history, I well recall how--while loathing England as the
-foe of this country--I still went with her in sympathy was she warring
-with France or Spain. I remember, too, that, in England’s civil wars, I
-was ever for the Roundhead and against the King. This, you say, sounds
-strangely for my theory, coming as I do from Virginia, that state of
-the Cavalier. One should reflect that Cavalierism--to invent a word--is
-naught save a Southern boast. Virginia, like most seaboard Southern
-states, was in its time a sort of Botany Bay whereunto, with other
-delinquents, political prisoners were condemned; my own ancestors
-coming, in good truth! by edict of the Bloody Jeffreys for the hand they
-took in Monmouth’s rebellion. It is true as I state, even as a child,
-too young for emotions save emotions of instinct, I was ever the
-friend, as I read history, first of my own country; and next of England,
-Germany, Holland, Denmark and Sweden-Nor-way--old race-camps of my
-forefathers, these--and like those same forefathers the uncompromising
-foe of France, Spain, Italy, and the entire Latin tribe, as soon as ever
-my reading taught me their existence.
-
-My filibusterer swung on his cable down the bay from Governor’s Island.
-During daylight I held the Harriet Lane at decent distance; when night
-came down I lay as closely by him as I might and give the ships room as
-they swept bow for stern with the tide. Also, we had a small-boat patrol
-in the water.
-
-It was the fourth day of my watch. I was ashore to stretch my legs, and
-at that particular moment, grown weary of walking, on a bench in Battery
-Park, from which coign I had both my filibusterer and the Harriet Lane
-beneath my eye, and could signal the latter whenever I would.
-
-On the bench with me sat a well-dressed stranger; I had before observed
-him during my walk. With an ease that bespoke the trained gentleman,
-and in manner unobtrusive, my fellow bencher stole into talk with me.
-Sharpened of my trade, he had not discoursed a moment before I felt and
-knew his purpose; he was friend to my filibusterer whose black freeboard
-showed broadside on as she tugged and strove with her cable not a mile
-away.
-
-He carried the talk to her at last.
-
-“I don’t believe she’s a filibusterer,” he said. Her character was
-common gossip, and he had referred to that. “I don’t believe she’s a
-filibusterer. I’d be glad to see her get out if I thought she were,” and
-he turned on me a tentative eye.
-
-Doubtless he observed a smile, and therein read encouragement. I told
-him my present business; not through vain jauntiness of pride, but I
-was aware that he well knew my mission before ever he sat down, and I
-thought I’d fog him up a bit with airs of innocence, and lead him to
-suppose I suspected him not.
-
-After much tacking and going about, first port and then starboard--to
-use the nautical phrase--he came straight at me.
-
-“Friend,” he said; “the cause of liberty--Cuban liberty, if you will--is
-dear to me. If that ship be a filibusterer and meant for Cuba’s aid,
-speaking as a humanitarian, I could give you ten thousand reasons, the
-best in the world, why you should let her sail.” This last, wistfully.
-
-Thereupon I lighted a cigar, having trouble by reason of the breeze.
-Then getting up, I took my handkerchief and wig-wagged the Harriet Lane
-to send the gig ashore. As I prepared to go down to the water-front, I
-turned to my humanitarian who so loved liberty.
-
-“Give your reasons to Betelnut Jack,” I said; “he delights in abstract
-deductions touching the rights of man as against the rights of states as
-deeply as did that Thetford Corset maker, Thomas Paine.”
-
-“Betelnut Jack!” said my humanitarian. “He shall have every reason
-within an hour.”
-
-“Should you convince him,” I retorted, “tell him as marking a fact in
-which I shall take the utmost interest to come to this spot at five
-o’clock and show me his handkerchief.”
-
-Then I joined the Harriet Lane.
-
-At the hour suggested, Betelnut Jack stood on the water’s edge and flew
-the signal. I put the captain’s glass on him to make sure. He had been
-given the reasons, and was convinced. There abode no doubt of it; the
-humanitarian was right and Cuba should be free. Besides, I remembered
-Madrid and hated Spain.
-
-“Captain,” I observed, as I handed that dignitary the glasses, “we will,
-if you please, lie in the Narrows to-night. If this fellow leave--which
-he won’t--he’ll leave that way. And we’ll pinch him.”
-
-The Captain bowed. We dropped down to the Narrows as the night fell
-black as pitch. The Captain and I cracked a bottle. As we toasted each
-other, our suspect crept out through the Sound, and by sunrise had long
-cleared Montauk and far and away was southward bound and safe on the
-open ocean.
-
-*****
-
-“I believe,” observed the Jolly Doctor to the Sour Gentleman when the
-latter paused, “I believe you said that the Filibusterer was in the end
-taken and shot.”
-
-“Seized when he made his landing,” returned the Sour Gentleman, “and
-killed against a wall in the morning.”
-
-“It was a cheap finish for a 10,000-dollar start,” remarked the Red
-Nosed Gentleman, sententiously. “But why should this adventurer, Ryan,
-as you call him, go into the business of freeing Cuba? Where would lie
-his profit? I don’t suppose now it was a love of liberty which put him
-in motion.”
-
-“The Cuban rebellionists,” said the Sour Gentleman, “were from first to
-last sustained by certain business firms in New York who had arranged to
-make money by their success. It is a kind of piracy quite common, this
-setting our Spanish-Americans to cutting throats that a profit may flow
-in Wall and Broad streets. Every revolution and almost every war in
-South and Central America have their inspirations in the counting-rooms
-of some great New York firm. I’ve known rival houses in New York to set
-a pair of South American republics to battling with each other like a
-brace of game cocks. Thousands were slain with that war. Sure, it is the
-merest blackest piracy; the deeds of Kidd or Morgan were milk-white by
-comparison.”
-
-“It shows also,” observed the Jolly Doctor, “how little the race has
-changed. In our hearts we are the same vikings of savage blood and
-pillage, and with no more of ruth, we were in the day of Harold
-Fairhair.”
-
-Sioux Sam, at the Old Cattleman’s suggestion, came now to relate the
-story of “How Moh-Kwa Saved the Strike Axe.”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXVI.--HOW MOH-KWA SAVED STRIKE-AXE.
-
-This shall be the story of how Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, saved Strike Axe
-from the medicine of Yellow Face, the bad medicine man, who would take
-his life an’ steal the Feather, his squaw. An’ it is a story good to
-show that you should never lose a chance to do a kind deed, since kind
-deeds are the steeps up which the Great Spirit makes you climb to reach
-the happiness at the top. When you do good, you climb up; when you do
-bad, you climb down; an’ at the top is happiness which is white, an’ at
-the bottom is pain which is black, an’ the Great Spirit says every man
-shall take his choice.
-
-Strike Axe is of the war-clan an’ is young. Also he is a big fighter
-next to Ugly Elk who is the war chief. An’ Strike Axe for all he is only
-a young man an’ has been but four times on the war trail, has already
-taken five skelps--one Crow, one Blackfoot, three Pawnees. This makes
-big talk among all the Sioux along the Yellowstone, an’ Strike Axe is
-proud an’ gay, for he is held a great warrior next to Ugly Elk; an’
-it is the Pawnees an’ Crows an’ Blackfeet who say this, which makes it
-better than if it is only the talk of the Sioux.
-
-When Ugly Elk sets up the war-pole, an’ calls to his young men to make
-ready to go against the Pawnees to take skelps an’ steal ponies, Strike
-Axe is the first to beat the war-pole with his stone club, an’ his war
-pony is the first that is saddled for the start.
-
-Strike Axe has a squaw an’ the name of the squaw is the Feather. Of the
-girls of the Sioux, the Feather is one of the most beautiful. Yet she is
-restless an’ wicked, an’ thinks plots an’ is hungry <an’ thirsty to do
-evil. But that is not the Feather’s fault.
-
-Yellow Face, the bad medicine man, has made a spell over the Feather.
-Yellow Face hates Strike Axe because of so much big talk about him.
-Also, he loves the Feather an’ would have her for his squaw. He tells
-her she is like the sunset, but she will not hear; then he says she
-is like the sunrise, but still she shakes her head, only she shakes it
-slow; so at last Yellow Face tells her she is like the Wild Rose, an’ at
-that she laughs an’ listens.
-
-[Illustration: 0397]
-
-But the Feather will not leave Strike Axe an’ go with Yellow Face,
-for Strike Axe is a big fighter; an’ moreover, he kills many elk an’
-buffalo, an’ his lodge is full of beef an’ robes, an’ the Feather is no
-fool. Besides, at this time her heart is not bad, but only restless.
-
-Then Yellow Face sees he must give her a bad heart or he will never win
-the Feather. So Yellow Face kills the Great Rattlesnake of the Rocks,
-who is his brother medicine, an’ cooks an’ feeds his heart to the
-Feather. Then she loves Yellow Face an’ hates Strike Axe, an’ would help
-the Yellow Face slay him. For the heart of the Great Rattlesnake of
-the Rocks is evil, an’ evil breeds evil where it touches, an’ so the
-Feather’s heart turns black like the snake’s heart which she swallowed
-from the hand of Yellow Face.
-
-Strike Axe does not know what the Feather an’ Yellow Face say an’ do,
-for he is busy sharpening his lance an’ making arrows to shoot against
-the Pawnees, an’ his ears an’ eyes have no time to run new trails. But
-Strike Axe can tell that the Feather’s heart is against him; an’ this
-makes him to wonder, because he is a big fighter; an’ besides he has
-more than any Sioux, meat an’ furs an’ beads an’ blankets an’ paint an’
-feathers, all of which are good to the eyes of squaws, an’ the Feather
-is no fool. An’, remembering these things, Strike Axe wonders an’
-wonders; but he cannot tell why the heart of the Feather is against him.
-An’ at last Strike Axe puts away the puzzle of the Feather’s heart.
-
-“It is a trail in running water,” says Strike Axe, “an’ no one may
-follow it. The heart of a squaw is a bird an’ flies in the air an’ no
-one may trace it.” With that, Strike Axe washes his memory free of the
-puzzle of the Feather’s heart an’ goes away to the big trees by the
-Yellowstone to hunt.
-
-Strike Axe tells the Feather he will be gone one moon; for now while
-her heart is against him his lodge is cold an’ his blankets hard an’ the
-fire no longer burns for Strike Axe, an’ his own heart is tired to be
-alone.
-
-It is among the big trees by the Yellowstone that Strike Axe meets
-Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, while Moh-Kwa is hunting for a bee tree. But he
-can’t find one, an’ he is sad an’ hungry an’ tells Strike Axe he fears
-the bees have gone far away to live with the Pawnees.
-
-But Strike Axe says “No!” an’ takes Moh-Kwa to a bee-tree he has found;
-an’ Moh-Kwa sings in his joy, an’ climbs an’ eats until he is in pain;
-while Strike Axe stands a long way off, for the bees are angry an’ their
-knives are out.
-
-Moh-Kwa is grateful to Strike Axe when his pain from much honey is gone,
-an’ says he will come each day, an’ eat an’ fight with the bees while
-there is honey left. An’ Moh-Kwa asks Strike Axe to remember that he
-is the Great Wise Bear of the Yellowstone, an’ to tell him what is evil
-with him so Moh-Kwa can do him good.
-
-Strike Axe thinks very hard; then he tells Moh-Kwa how the Feather’s
-heart is against him an’ has left him; he would know what the Feather
-will do an’ where her heart has gone.
-
-Moh-Kwa puts his paw above his eyes to keep out the sun so he can
-think better; an’ soon Moh-Kwa remembers that the wife of the Great
-Rattlesnake of the Rocks, when he met her hunting rats among the cliffs,
-told him she was now a widow, for Yellow Face had killed the Great
-Rattlesnake of the Rocks--who was his brother medicine--an’ fed his
-heart to the Feather.
-
-Moh-Kwa tells Strike Axe how the Feather was bewitched by Yellow Face.
-
-“Come now with me,” said Moh-Kwa to Strike Axe, “an’ I will show you
-what the Feather an’ Yellow Face do while you are gone. You are a young
-buck an’ a good buck, an’ because of your youth an’ the kind deed you
-did when you found for me the bees--to whom I shall go back an’ fight
-with for more honey to-morrow and every day while it lasts--I will show
-you a danger like a lance, an’ how to hold your shield so you may come
-safe from it.”
-
-Moh-Kwa took Strike Axe by the hand an’ led him up a deep canyon an’
-into his cavern where a big fire burned in the floor’s middle for light.
-An’ bats flew about the roof of Moh-Kwa’s cavern an’ owls sat on points
-of rock high up on the sides an’ made sad talks; but Strike Axe being
-brave an’ with a good heart, was not afraid an’ went close to the fire
-in the floor’s middle an’ sat down.
-
-Moh-Kwa got him a fish to eat; an’ when it was baked on the coals an’
-eaten, brought him a pipe with kinnikinick to smoke. When that was done,
-Moh-Kwa said:
-
-“Now that your stomach is full an’ strong to stand grief, I will show
-you what the Feather an’ Yellow Face do while you are gone; for they
-make medicine against you an’ reach out to kill you an’ take your life.”
- Moh-Kwa then turned over a great stone with his black paws an’ took
-out of a hole which was under the stone, a looking glass. Moh-Kwa gave
-Strike Axe the looking glass an’ said, “Look; for there you shall see
-the story of what the Feather an’ the wicked Yellow Face do.”
-
-Strike Axe looked, an’ saw that Yellow Face was wrapping up a log in a
-blanket. When he had done this, he belted it with the belts of Strike
-Axe; an’ then he put on its head the war-bonnet of Strike Axe which hung
-on the lodge pole. An’ now that it was finished, Yellow Face said the
-log in the blanket an’ wearing the belts an’ war-bonnet was Strike
-Axe--as Strike Axe saw truly in the looking glass--an’ Yellow Face stood
-up the log in its blanket an’ belts an’ war-bonnet, an’ made his bow
-ready to kill it with an arrow. As Yellow Face did these things, the
-Feather stood watching him with a smile on her face while the blood-hope
-shone in her eyes; for she had eaten the snake’s heart an’ all her
-spirit was black.
-
-Strike Axe saw what went on with the Feather an’ Yellow Face, an’ told
-it as the glass told it, word for word to Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, who
-sat by his side to listen.
-
-Then Moh-Kwa, when he knew that now Yellow Face with three arrows in
-his left hand was stringing a bow to shoot against the log which he
-had dressed up an’ named “Strike Axe,” said there was little time to be
-lost; an’ Moh-Kwa hurried Strike Axe to the round deep spring of clear
-water which was in the cavern, an’ told him to stand on the edge of the
-spring an’ look hard in the looking glass an’ take sharp notice just as
-Yellow Face was to shoot the arrow against the log.
-
-“An’ you must dive in the spring when Yellow Face shoots,” said Moh-Kwa
-to Strike Axe; “you must dive like the loon dives when you shoot at him
-on the river.”
-
-Strike Axe looked hard in the looking glass like Moh-Kwa said, an’ dived
-in the spring when the arrow left the bow of Yellow Face.
-
-When he came up, he looked again in the glass an’ saw that Yellow Face
-had missed the log. Yellow Face had a half-fear because he had missed,
-an’ Strike Axe looking in Moh-Kwa’s glass could see the half-fear
-rising up as a mist in his eyes like a morning fog lifts up from the
-Yellowstone. Also, the Feather stood watching Yellow Face, an’ her eyes,
-which were grown hard an’ little an’ bright, like a snake’s eyes, showed
-that she did not care what happened only so that it was evil.
-
-But Moh-Kwa told Strike Axe to still watch closely, an’ would not let
-his mind pull up its pickets an’ stray; because Yellow Face would shoot
-twice more with the arrows which were left; an’ he must be quick an’
-ready each time to dive like the loon dives, or he would surely die by
-the log’s wound.
-
-Strike Axe, because he had eaten the fish an’ smoked, an’ had a full
-stomach an’ was bold an’ steady with a heart made brave with much food,
-again looked hard in the glass; an’ when the second arrow left the bow
-of Yellow Face he dived sharply in the spring like a loon; an’ when he
-came up an’ held the looking glass before his eyes he saw that Yellow
-Face had missed the log a second time.
-
-An’ now there was a whole-fear in the eyes of Yellow Face--a white fear
-that comes when a man sees Pau-guk, the Death, walk into the lodge; an’
-the hand of Yellow Face trembled as he made ready his last third arrow
-on the bow. But in the eyes of the Feather shone no fear; only she
-lapped out her tongue like the snake does, with the black pleasure of
-new evil at the door.
-
-Moh-Kwa warned Strike Axe to look only at Yellow Face that he might be
-sure an’ swift as the loon to dive from the last arrow. Strike Axe did
-as Moh-Kwa counselled; an’ when the last arrow flew from the bow,
-Strike Axe with a big splash was safe an’ deep beneath the waters of the
-spring.
-
-“An’ now,” said Moh-Kwa to Strike Axe, “look in the glass an’ laugh,
-for a blessing of revenge has been bestowed on you through the Great
-Spirit.”
-
-Strike Axe looked an’ saw that not only did Yellow Face miss the log,
-but the arrow flew back an’ pierced the throat of Yellow Face, even up
-to the three eagle feathers on the arrow’s shaft. As Strike Axe looked,
-he saw Yellow Face die; an’ a feeling like the smell of new grass came
-about the heart of Strike Axe, for there is nothing so warm an’ sweet
-an’ quick with peace as revenge when it sees an’ smells the fresh blood
-of its enemy.
-
-Moh-Kwa told Strike Axe to still look in the glass; for while the danger
-was gone he would know what the Feather did when now that Yellow Face
-was killed by the turning of his own medicine.
-
-Strike Axe looked, an’ saw how the Feather dammed up the water in a
-little brook near the lodge; an’ when the bed of the brook was free of
-water the Feather dug a hole in the soft ground with her hands like a
-wolf digs with his paws. An’ the Feather made it deep an’ long an’ wide;
-an’ then she put the dead Yellow Face in this grave in the brook’s
-bed. When she had covered him with sand an’ stones, the Feather let the
-waters free; an’ the brook went back to its old trail which it loved,
-an’ laughed an’ ran on, never caring about the dead Yellow Face who lay
-under its wet feet.
-
-Then the Feather went again into the lodge an’ undressed the log of its
-blankets, belts an’ war-bonnet; an’ the Feather burned the bow an’ the
-arrows of Yellow Face, an’ made everything as it was before. Only now
-Yellow Face lay dead under the brook; but no one knew, an’ the brook
-itself already had forgot--for the brook’s memory is slippery an’ thin
-an’ not a good memory, holding nothing beyond a moment--an’ the Feather
-felt safe an’ happy; for her heart fed on evil an’ evil had been done.
-
-Strike Axe came out from the cave with Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear.
-
-“You have given me life,” said Strike Axe.
-
-“You have given me honey,” said Moh-Kwa.
-
-Then Strike Axe was troubled in his mind, an’ he told Moh-Kwa that he
-knew not what he must do with the Feather when he returned. But Moh-Kwa
-said that he should make his breast light, an’ free his thought of the
-Feather as a burden, for one would be in his lodge before him with the
-answer to his question.
-
-“It is the Widow,” said Moh-Kwa, “who was the wife of the Great
-Rattlesnake of the Rocks; she will go to your tepee to be close to the
-heart of her husband. In her mouth the Widow will bring a message from
-Yellow Face to the Feather for whom he died an’ was hid beneath the
-careless brook.”
-
-Thus said Moh-Kwa. An’ Strike Axe found that Moh-Kwa spoke with but one
-tongue; for when he stood again in his lodge the Feather lay across the
-door, dead an’ black with the message of Yellow Face which was sent to
-her in the mouth of the Widow. An’ as Strike Axe looked on the Feather,
-the Widow rattled joyfully where she lay coiled on the Feather’s breast;
-for the Widow was glad because she was near to her husband’s heart.
-
-But Moh-Kwa was not there to look; Moh-Kwa had gone early to the
-bee-tree, an’ now with his nose in a honey comb was high an’ hearty up
-among the angry bees.
-
-There arose no little approbative comment on the folk-lore tales of
-Sioux Sam, and it was common opinion that his were by odds and away the
-best stories to be told among us. These hearty plaudits were not without
-pleasant effect on Sioux Sam, and one might see his dark cheek flush to
-a color darker still with the joy he felt.
-
-And yet someone has said how the American Indian is stolid and cold.
-
-It was the Red Nosed Gentleman, as the clock struck midnight on this our
-last evening and we threw our last log on the coals, who suggested that
-the Jolly Doctor, having told the first story, should in all propriety
-close in the procession by furnishing the last. There was but one voice
-for it, and the Jolly Doctor, who would have demurred for that it seemed
-to lack of modesty on his side, in the end conceded the point with
-grace.
-
-“This,” said the Jolly Doctor, composing himself to a comfortable
-position in his great chair, “this, then, shall be the story of ‘The
-Flim Flam Murphy.’”
-
-
-
-
-CHAPTER XXVII.--THE FLIM FLAM MURPHY.
-
-Chicken Bill was not beautiful with his shock of coarse hair and foul
-pipe in mouth. Doubtless, Chicken Bill was likewise an uncompromising
-villain. Indeed, Pike’s Peak Martin, expert both of men and mines, one
-evening in the Four Flush saloon, casually, but with insulting fullness,
-set these things forth to Chicken Bill himself; and while Pike’s Peak
-Martin was always talking, he was not always wrong.
-
-On this occasion of Pike’s Peak Martin’s frankness, Chicken Bill, albeit
-he carried contradiction at his belt in the shape of a six-shooter,
-walked away without attempting either denial or reproof. This conduct,
-painful to the sentiment of Timberline, had the two-fold effect of
-confirming Pike’s Peak Martin’s utterances in the minds of men, and
-telling against the repute of Chicken Bill for that personal courage
-which is the great first virtue the Southwest demands.
-
-Old Man Granger found the earliest gold in Arizona Gulch. And hot on the
-news of the strike came Chicken Bill. It was the latter’s boast about
-the bar-rooms of Timberline that he was second to come into the canyon;
-and as this was the only word of truth of which Chicken Bill was guilty
-while he honored the camp with his presence, it deserves a record.
-
-Following Old Man Granger’s discovery of his Old Age mine, came not only
-Chicken Bill, but others; within a week there arose the bubbling camp
-of Timberline. There were saloons and hurdy-gurdies and stores and
-restaurants and a bank and a corral and a stage station and an express
-office and a post-office and an assay office and board sidewalks and red
-lights and many another plain evidence of civilization. Even a theatre
-was threatened; and, to add to the gayety as well as the wealth of
-the baby metropolis, those sundry cattlemen having ranges and habitats
-within the oak-brushed hills about, began to make Timberline their
-headquarters and transact their business and their debauches in its
-throbbing midst.
-
-[Illustration: 0411]
-
-Chicken Bill was reasonably perfect in all accomplishments of the
-Southwest. He could work cattle; he could rope, throw, and hog-tie his
-steer; he could keep up his end at flanking, branding, and ear-marking
-in a June corral; he could saddle and ride a wild, unbroken bronco; he
-could make baking-powder biscuit so well flavored and light as to compel
-the compliments of those jealous epicures of the cow-camps who devoured
-them.
-
-Yet Chicken Bill would not work on the ranges. There were no cards
-permitted in the camps, and whiskey was debarred as if each bottle held
-a rattlesnake. Altogether a jovial soul, and one given to revelry, would
-fly from them in disgust.
-
-“It’s too lonesome a play for me, this punchin’ cattle,” observed
-Chicken Bill, and so eschewed it.
-
-While Pike’s Peak Martin expounded this aversion on the part of Chicken
-Bill, as well as the latter’s refusal to pick and dig and drill and
-blast in the Timberline mines, as mere laziness, public feeling,
-though it despised the culprit, was inclined to tolerate him in his
-shiftlessness. American independence in the Southwest is held to be
-inclusive of the personal right to refuse all forms of labor. Wherefore
-Chicken Bill was safe even from criticism as he hung about the saloons
-and faro rooms and lived his life of chosen vagabondage.
-
-Our low-flung hero made shift in various ways. Did he find a tenderfoot
-whom he could cheat at cards, he borrowed a stake--sometimes, when the
-subject was uncommonly tender, from the victim himself--and therewith
-took a small sum at poker or seven-up. Another method of trivial fraud,
-now and then successful with Chicken Bill, was to plant a handful
-of brass nuggets, each of about an ounce in weight, under a little
-waterfall that broke into the canyon just below the windmill. There
-was a deal of mineral in this feeble side-stream, and the brass nuggets
-became coated and queer of color.
-
-One of these Chicken Bill was able at intervals to impose at a profit
-upon a stranger, by swearing doughtily that it was virgin gold.
-
-It came to pass, however, that Chicken Bill, despairing of fortune by
-the cheap processes of penny-ante and spurious nuggets, decided on a
-coup. He would stake out a claim, drift it and timber it, and then
-salt it to the limit of all that was possible in the science of
-claim-salting. Then would he sell it to the first Christian with more
-money than sagacity who came moved to buy a mine.
-
-Chicken Bill was no amateur of mines. He knew the business as he knew
-the cow trade, and avoided it for the same reason of indolence. In his
-time, and after some windfall at faro-bank, Chicken Bill had grub-staked
-prospectors who were to “give him half” and who never came back. In his
-turn Chicken Bill was grub-staked by others, in which event he never
-came back. But it went with other experiences to teach him the trade,
-and on the morning when with pick and paraphernalia Chicken Bill pitched
-camp in Arizona Gulch a mile beyond the farthest, and where it was known
-to all no mineral lurked, he brought with him a knowledge of the miner’s
-art, and began his digging with intelligent spirit. Moreover, the
-heart of Chicken Bill was stout for the work; for was he not planning
-a swindle? and did not that thought of itself swell his bosom with a
-mighty peace?
-
-Once upon a time Chicken Bill had had a partner.
-
-This partner was frequently on the lips of Chicken Bill, especially when
-our hero was in his cups. He was always mentioned with a gush of tears,
-this partner, and his name as furnished by Chicken Bill was Flim Flam
-Murphy. Flim Flam had met death somewhere in the Gunnison country while
-making good his name, and passed with the smoke of the Colt’s-44 that
-dismissed him. But Chicken Bill reverenced the memory of this talented
-man and was ready to honor him, and, having staked out his claim with
-the fraudulent purpose aforesaid, filed on it appropriately as “The Flim
-Flam Murphy.”
-
-It would be unjust to the intelligence of Timberline to permit one for
-a moment to suppose that the dullest of her male citizenry lived unaware
-of the ignoble plans of Chicken Bill. That he proposed to salt a claim
-and therewith ensnare the stranger within the local gates were truths
-which all men knew. But all men cared not; and mention of the enterprise
-when the miracle of Chicken Bill at work found occasional comment
-over the bars, aroused nothing save a sluggish curiosity as to whether
-Chicken Bill would succeed. No thought of warning the unwary arose in
-the Timberline heart.
-
-“It’s the proper play,” observed Pike’s Peak Martin, representative of
-Timberline feeling, “to let every gent seelect his own licker an’ hobble
-his own hoss. If Chicken Bill can down anybody for his bankroll without
-making a gun play to land the trick, thar’s no call for the public to
-interfere.”
-
-It was about this time that Chicken Bill added to his ornate scheme of
-claim-salting--a plain affair of the heart. The lady to thus cast her
-spell over Chicken Bill was known as Deadwood Maggie and flourished a
-popular waitress in the Belle Union Hotel. Timberline thought well of
-Deadwood Maggie, and her place in general favor found suggestion in a
-remark of Pike’s Peak Martin.
-
-“Deadwood Maggie,” observed that excellent spirit, as he replaced his
-glass on the Four Flush bar and turned to an individual who had been
-guilty of words derogatory to the lady in question; “Dead-wood Maggie
-is a virchoous young female, an’ it shore frets me to hear her lightly
-allooded to.”
-
-As Pike’s Peak Martin’s disapproval took the violent form of smiting the
-maligner upon the head with an 8-inch pistol, the social status of the
-lady was ever after regarded as fixed.
-
-Chicken Bill was not the one to eat his heart in silence, and his
-passion was but one day old when he laid hand and fortune at Deadwood
-Maggie’s feet. That maiden for her part displayed a suspicious front,
-born perhaps of an experience of the perfidy of man. Deadwood Maggie was
-inclined to a scorn of Chicken Bill and his proffer of instant wedlock.
-
-“Not on your life!” was Deadwood Maggie’s reply.
-
-But Chicken Bill persisted; he longed more ardently because of this
-rebuff. To soften Deadwood Maggie he threw a gallant arm about her and
-drew her to his bosom.
-
-“Don’t be in sech a hurry to lose me,” said Chicken Bill on this
-sentimental occasion.
-
-Deadwood Maggie was arranging tables at the time for those guests who
-from mine and store and bar-room would come, stamping and famishing,
-an hour later. Chicken Bill and she for the moment had the apartment
-to themselves. Goaded by her lover’s sweet persistency, and unable to
-phrase a retort that should do her feelings justice, Deadwood Maggie
-fell to the trite expedient of breaking a butter-dish on the head of
-Chicken Bill.
-
-“Now pull your freight,” said she, “or I’ll chunk you up with all the
-crockery in the camp.”
-
-Finding Deadwood Maggie obdurate, Chicken Bill for the nonce withdrew
-to consider the situation. He was in no sort dispirited; he regarded
-the butter-dish and those threats which came after it as marks of maiden
-coyness; they were decisive of nothing.
-
-“She wasn’t in the mood,” said Chicken Bill, as he explained his repulse
-to the bar-keeper of the Four Flush Saloon; “but I’ll get my lariat on
-her yet. Next time I’ll rope with a larger loop.”
-
-“That’s the racket!” said the bar-keeper.
-
-Chicken Bill in a small way was a gifted rascal. After profound
-contemplation of Deadwood Maggie in her obstinacy, he determined to
-win her with the conveyance of a one-quarter interest in The Flim Flam
-Murphy. Deadwood Maggie knew nothing of the worthlessness of The Flim
-Flam Murphy. Chicken Bill would represent it to her as a richer strike
-than Old Man Granger’s Old Age Mine. He would give her one-quarter.
-There would be no risk; Deadwood Maggie, when once his wife and getting
-a good figure for the mine, would make no demur to selling to whatever
-tenderfoot he might dupe. This plan had merit; at least one must suppose
-so, for the soul of Deadwood Maggie was visibly softened thereby.
-
-“I must have you, Maggie,” wooed Chicken Bill, when he had put forth
-the sterling character of The Flim Flam Murphy and expressed himself
-as determined to bestow on her the one-fourth interest, a conveyance
-whereof in writing he held then in his hand; “I can’t live without you.
-When you busted me with that yootensil you made me yours forever. I
-swear by this gun I pack, I’ll not outlive your refusal to wed me longer
-than to jest get good an’ drunk an’ put a bullet through my head.”
-
-Who could resist such love and such hyperbole? Deadwood Maggie wept;
-then she took the deed to the one-fourth interest in The Flim Flam
-Murphy, kissed Chicken Bill, and said she would drift into his arms as
-his wife at the end of two months. Chicken Bill objected strenuously to
-such a recess for his affections, but with the last of it was driven to
-yield.
-
-There came a time when The Flim Flam Murphy salted to the last degree
-of salt was as perfect a trap for a tenderfoot as any ever set. And as
-though luck were seeking Chicken Bill, a probable prey stepped from the
-stage next day.
-
-Chicken Bill and the stranger were seen in prompt and lengthy
-conference. Timberline, looking on, grinned in a tolerant way. For two
-days Chicken Bill and the stranger did nothing but explore the drift,
-inspect the timbering, and consider specimens taken from The Flim Flam
-Murphy.
-
-At last the stranger filled ten small canvas sacks with specimens of ore
-and brought them into camp on a buckboard to be assayed. Chicken Bill
-was with him; and pleading internal pains that made it impossible to
-ride upright, our wily one lay back with the bags of specimens while
-the stranger drove. From time to time the astute Chicken Bill, having
-advantage of rough places in the canyon’s bed which engaged the
-faculties of the stranger, emptied some two or three quills of powdered
-gold into each specimen sack by the ingenius process of forcing the
-sharpened point of the quill through the web of the canvas, and blowing
-the treasure in among the ore.
-
-“It’s a cinch!” ruminated Chicken Bill, when he had completed these
-improvements. Then he refreshed himself from a whiskey flask, said that
-he felt better, and climbed back beside the stranger on the buckboard’s
-seat.
-
-There came the assay next day. With that ceremony Chicken Bill had
-nothing to do, and could only wait. But he owned no misgivings; there
-would come but one result; the ore would show a richness not to be
-resisted.
-
-Chicken Bill put in his time preparing Deadwood Maggie for the sale.
-He told her that not a cent less than sixty thousand dollars would be
-accepted.
-
-“It’s worth more,” declared Chicken Bill, “but me an’ you, Maggie, ain’t
-got the long green to develop it. Our best play is to cash in if we can
-get the figure.”
-
-But disaster was striding on the trail of Chicken Bill. That evening, as
-Deadwood Maggie was returning to the Belle Union from the Dutch Woman’s
-Store, to which mart she had been driven for a tooth-brush, she was
-blasted with the spectacle of Chicken Bill and a Mexican girl in
-confidential converse just ahead. Deadwood Maggie, a bit violent of
-nature, had been in no wise calmed by her several years on the border.
-While not wildly in love, still her impulse was to dismantle, if not
-dismember, the senorita thus softly whispering and being whispered to
-by the recreant Chicken Bill. But on second thought Deadwood Maggie
-restrained herself. She would observe the full untruth of Chicken Bill.
-
-[Illustration: 0421]
-
-The next day, when Chicken Bill called on Dead-wood Maggie, he was met
-with a smothering flight of table furniture and told never to come back.
-
-It was a crisis with Chicken Bill. The assay had been a victory and the
-stranger stood ready, cash in hand, to pay the sixty thousand dollars
-demanded for The Flim Flam Murphy. Chicken Bill felt the necessity of
-getting the money without delay. Any marplot, whether from drink or that
-mean officiousness which hypocrites call “conscience,” might say the
-word that would arm the tenderfoot with a knowledge of his peril. But
-Chicken Bill could not come to speech with Dead-wood Maggie. In a blaze
-of jealousy, that wronged woman would begin throwing things the moment
-he appeared. As a last resort, Chicken Bill dispatched the bar-keeper of
-the Four Flush to Dead-wood Maggie. This diplomat was told to set forth
-the crying needs of the hour, Chicken Bill promising friendship for life
-and five hundred dollars if he made Deadwood Maggie see reason.
-
-Ten minutes later the bar-keeper returned, bleeding from a cut over his
-eye.
-
-“Did it with a stove-lifter,” he explained, as he laved the wound in a
-basin at the corner of the bar. “Say! you can’t get near enough to that
-lady to give her a diamond ring.”
-
-Chicken Bill made a gesture of despair; he saw that Deadwood Maggie was
-lost to him forever.
-
-But the sale of The Flim Flam Murphy must go on. Chicken Bill sought the
-tenderfoot. He found him with a smile on his face reading the report of
-The Flim Flam Murphy assay. Chicken Bill guardedly explained that he had
-a partner, name not given, who objected to the sale. The partner held a
-one-quarter share in The Flim Flam Murphy. The stranger, who knew it all
-along from the records, pondered briefly. Finally he broke the silence:
-
-“Would Chicken Bill sell his three-quarters?”
-
-Chicken Bill composed his face. Chicken Bill would sell.
-
-Nothing is big in the Southwest; transactions of millions are disposed
-of while one eats a flap-jack. In an hour the stranger had acquired The
-Flim Flam Murphy interest which was vested in Chicken Bill; in two hours
-that immoralist was speeding by vague trails to regions new, forty-five
-thousand dollars in his belt and a soreness in his heart.
-
-Timberline felt a quiet amusement in the situation. It leaned back and
-waited in a superior way for the stranger to set up the low wail of the
-robbed. The outcry couldn’t be long deferred; the fraud must be soon
-unmasked since the development of The Flim Flam Murphy was gone about
-with diligence and on a dazzling scale.
-
-But the stranger did not complain.
-
-Two weeks were added to that vast eternity which had preceded them
-and the sobered sentiment of Timberline began to think it might better
-investigate. Timberline, however, would proceed with caution; missing
-its laugh, it must now guard itself against being laughed at.
-
-It turned as the wise ones had begun to apprehend. The Flim Flam
-Murphy was a two-million dollar wonder. The talented Chicken Bill had
-overreached himself. With no hope beyond a plan to salt a claim, he had
-not thought to secure an assay for himself. The Flim Flam Murphy loomed
-upon mankind as Timberline’s richest strike.
-
-Pike’s Peak Martin was the first to collect himself. Crawling from
-beneath that landslide of amazement which had caught and covered
-Timberline, he visited the Belle Union with a resolved air. Pointedly
-but fully Pike’s Peak Martin tendered himself in marriage to Dead wood
-Maggie. That lady did not hurl a butter-dish; such feats would seem too
-effervescent on the part of a gentlewoman worth five hundred thousand
-dollars.
-
-Deadwood Maggie blushed with drooping lids as she heard the words of
-Pike’s Peak Martin.
-
-“Which your offer shore makes a hit with me,” murmured Deadwood Maggie.
-Then, when a moment later, her head lay on Pike’s Peak Martin’s shoulder
-like some tired flower at rest, Deadwood Maggie gave a sigh, and
-lifting her eyes to the deep inquiring gaze of Pike’s Peak Martin, she
-whispered: “You’re the only gent I ever loved.”
-
-
-THE END.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
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- <head>
- <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=UTF-8" />
- <title>THE BLACK LION INN, By Alfred Henry Lewis</title>
- <meta content="pg2html (binary v0.17)" />
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-<pre>
-
-The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Black Lion Inn, by Alfred Henry Lewis
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
-other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
-the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
-to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
-
-
-
-Title: The Black Lion Inn
-
-Author: Alfred Henry Lewis
-
-Illustrator: Frederic Remington
-
-Release Date: August 31, 2017 [EBook #55471]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE BLACK LION INN ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by David Widger from page images generously
-provided by the Internet Archive
-
-
-
-
-
-
-</pre>
-
- <div style="height: 8em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h1>
- THE BLACK LION INN
- </h1>
- <h2>
- By Alfred Henry Lewis
- </h2>
- <h3>
- Illustrated By Frederic Remington
- </h3>
- <h4>
- New York: R. H. Russell
- </h4>
- <h3>
- 1903
- </h3>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0001" id="linkimage-0001"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0001.jpg" alt="0001 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0001.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0002" id="linkimage-0002"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0008.jpg" alt="0008 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0008.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0003" id="linkimage-0003"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0009.jpg" alt="0009 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0009.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- <b>CONTENTS</b>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0001"> CHAPTER I.&mdash;HOW I CAME TO THE INN. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0002"> CHAPTER II.&mdash;THE WINNING OF SAUCY PAOLI.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0003"> CHAPTER III.&mdash;HOW FORKED TONGUE WAS BURNED.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0004"> CHAPTER IV.&mdash;THAT TOBACCO UPSET. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0005"> CHAPTER V.&mdash;THE SIGN OF THREE. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0006"> CHAPTER VI.&mdash;THAT WOLFVILLE CHRISTMAS. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0007"> CHAPTER VII.&mdash;THE PITT STREET STRINGENCY.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0008"> CHAPTER VIII.&mdash;THAT STOLEN ACE OF HEARTS.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0009"> CHAPTER IX.&mdash;CHIQUITA OF CHAPARITA. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0010"> CHAPTER X.&mdash;HOW STRONGARM WAS AN ELK. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0011"> CHAPTER XI.&mdash;THAT SMUGGLED SILK. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0012"> CHAPTER XII.&mdash;THE WIPING OUT OF McCANDLAS.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0013"> CHAPTER XIII.&mdash;HOW JIM BRITT PASSED HIS
- BILL. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0014"> CHAPTER XIV.&mdash;HOW TO TELL THE LAST FOUR.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0015"> CHAPTER XV.&mdash;HOW MOH-KWA FED THE CATFISH.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0016"> CHAPTER XVI.&mdash;THE EMPEROR&rsquo;S CIGARS. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0017"> CHAPTER XVII.&mdash;THE GREAT STEWART CAMPAIGN.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0018"> CHAPTER XVIII.&mdash;THE RESCUE OF CONNELLY. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0019"> CHAPTER XIX.&mdash;MOH-KWA AND THE THREE GIFTS.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0020"> CHAPTER XX.&mdash;THE GERMAN GIRL&rsquo;S DIAMONDS.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0021"> CHAPTER XXI.&mdash;THE LUCK OF COLD-SOBER SIMMS.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0022"> CHAPTER XXII.&mdash;HOW PRINCE RUPERT LOST. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0023"> CHAPTER XXIII.&mdash;WHEN I RAN THE SHOTGUN. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0024"> CHAPTER XXIV.&mdash;WHEN THE CAPITOL WAS MOVED.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0025"> CHAPTER XXV.&mdash;HOW THE FILIBUSTERER SAILED.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0026"> CHAPTER XXVI.&mdash;HOW MOH-KWA SAVED STRIKE-AXE.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0027"> CHAPTER XXVII.&mdash;THE FLIM FLAM MURPHY. </a>
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0001" id="link2HCH0001"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER I.&mdash;HOW I CAME TO THE INN.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">Y</span>ears ago, I came
- upon an old and hoary tavern when I as a fashion of refugee was flying
- from strong drink. Its name, as shown on the creaking sign-board, was The
- Black Lion Inn. My coming was the fruit of no plan; the hostelry was
- strange to me, and my arrival, casual and desultory, one of those
- accidents which belong with the experiences of folk who, whipped of a bad
- appetite and running from rum, are seeking only to be solitary and win a
- vacation for their selfrespect. This latter commodity in my own poor case
- had been sadly overworked, and called for rest and an opportunity of
- recuperation. Wherefore, going quietly and without word from the great
- city, I found this ancient inn with a purpose to turn presently sober.
- Also by remaining secluded for a space I would permit the memory of those
- recent dubious exploits of the cup to become a bit dimmed in the bosom of
- my discouraged relatives.
- </p>
- <p>
- It turned a most fortunate blunder, this blundering discovery of the aged
- inn, for it was here I met the Jolly Doctor who, by saving me from my fate
- of a drunkard, a fate to which I was hopelessly surrendered, will dwell
- ever in my thoughts as a greatest benefactor.
- </p>
- <p>
- There is that about an appetite for alcohol I can not understand. In my
- personal instance there is reason to believe it was inherited. And yet my
- own father never touched a drop and lived and died the uncompromising
- enemy of the bowl. It was from my grandsire, doubtless, I had any
- hankering after rum, for I have heard a sigh or two of how that dashing
- military gentleman so devoted himself to it that he fairly perished for
- very faithfulness as far away as eighty odd long years.
- </p>
- <p>
- Once when my father and I were roaming the snow-filled woods with our guns&mdash;I
- was a lad of twelve&mdash;having heard little of that ancestor, I asked
- him what malady carried off my grandsire. My father did not reply at once,
- but stalked silently ahead, rifle caught under arm, the snow crunching
- beneath his heavy boots. Then he flung a sentence over his shoulder.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Poor whiskey more than anything else,&rdquo; said my father.
- </p>
- <p>
- Even at the unripe age of twelve I could tell how the subject was
- unpleasant to my parent and did not press it. I saved my curiosity until
- evening when my mother and I were alone. My mother, to whom I re-put the
- query, informed me in whispers how she had been told&mdash;for she never
- met him, he being dead and gone before her day&mdash;my grandsire threw
- away his existence upon the bottle.
- </p>
- <p>
- The taste for strong waters so developed in my grandsire would seem like a
- quartz-ledge to have &ldquo;dipped&rdquo; beneath my father to strike the family
- surface with all its old-time richness in myself. I state this the more
- secure of its truth because I was instantly and completely a drunkard,
- waiving every preliminary stage as a novice, from the moment of my first
- glass.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was my first day of the tavern when I met the Jolly Doctor. The tavern
- was his home&mdash;for he lived a perilous bachelor&mdash;and had been
- many years; and when, being in a shaken state, I sent down from the
- apartments I had taken and requested the presence of a physician, he came
- up to me. He had me right and on my feet in the course of a few hours, and
- then I began to look him in the face and make his acquaintance.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I abode in the tavern for a considerable space, we put in many friendly
- hours together. The Jolly Doctor was a round, strong, active body of a
- man, virile and with an atmosphere almost hypnotic. His forehead was good,
- his jaw hard, his nose arched, while his gray-blue eyes, half sour, half
- humorous and deeply wise of the world, gleamed in his head with the shine
- of beads.
- </p>
- <p>
- One evening while we were together about the fireplace of my parlor, I was
- for having up a bottle of sherry.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Before you give the order,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, restraining me with a
- friendly yet semiprofessional gesture, &ldquo;let me say a word. Let me ask
- whether you have an intention or even a hope of one day&mdash;no matter
- how distant&mdash;quitting alcohol?&rdquo; Without pausing for my answer, the
- Jolly Doctor went on. &ldquo;You are yet a young man; I suppose you have seen
- thirty years. It has been my experience, albeit I&rsquo;m but fifteen years your
- senior and not therefore as old as a hill, that no man uproots a habit
- after he has reached middle age. While climbing, mentally, physically,
- nervously, the slope of his years and adding to, not taking from, his
- strength, a man may so far re-draw himself as to make or break an appetite&mdash;the
- appetite of strong drink&mdash;if you will. But let him attain the summit
- of his strength, reach as it were the crest of his days and begin to
- travel down the easy long descent toward the grave, and every chance of
- change has perished beyond his reach. You are thirty; and to make it
- short, my friend, you must, considering what bottle tendencies lie latent
- within you, stop now and stop hard, or you are lost forever.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- To say I was impressed is not to exaggerate. I was frank enough to
- confess, however, that privately I held no hope of change. Several years
- before, I had become convinced, after a full survey of myself and the
- close study of my inclinations, that I was born to live and die, like my
- grandsire, the victim of drink. I was its thrall, bound to it as I lay in
- my cradle; there existed no gate of escape. This I told; not joyously, I
- promise you, or as one reciting good fortune; not argumentatively and as
- reason for the forthcoming of asked-for wine; but because it was true and
- made, as I held it, a reason for going in this matter of tipple with
- freest rein since dodge or balk my fate I might not.
- </p>
- <p>
- At the close my Jolly Doctor shook his head in negative.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;No man knows his destiny,&rdquo; said he, &ldquo;until the game&rsquo;s played out. Come,
- let me prescribe for you. The drug I have in mind has cured folk; I should
- add, too, that for some it carries neither power nor worth. Still, it will
- do no harm, and since we may have a test of its virtues within three days;
- at the worst you will be called upon to surrender no more than seventy-two
- hours to sobriety.&rdquo; This last was delivered like a cynic.
- </p>
- <p>
- On my side, I not only thanked the Jolly Doctor for his concern, but
- hastened to assure him I would willingly make pact to abstain from alcohol
- not three days, but three weeks or three months, were it necessary to
- pleasure his experiment. My bent for drink was in that degree peculiar
- that I was not so much its disciple who must worship constantly and every
- day, as one of those who are given to sprees. Often and of choice I was a
- stranger to so much as the odor of rum for weeks on end. Then would come
- other weeks of tumult and riot and drunkenness. The terms of trial for his
- medicine would be easily and comfortably undergone by me. He had my
- promise of three days free of rum.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Jolly Doctor went to his room; returning, he placed on the table a
- little bottle of liquid, reddish in color and bitter of taste.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Red cinchona, it is,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor; &ldquo;cinchona rubra, or rather
- the fluid extract of that bark. It is not a tincture; there is no alcohol
- about it. The remedy is well known and I oft marvel it has had no wider
- vogue. As I&rsquo;ve told you, and on the principle, probably, that one man&rsquo;s
- poison is another man&rsquo;s food, it does not always cure. However, we will
- give you a teaspoonful once in three hours and observe the effect in your
- particular case.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- There shall be little more related on this point of dypsomania and its
- remedy. I took the prescription for a trio of days. At the expiration I
- sate me solemnly down and debated within myself whether or no I craved
- strong drink, with the full purpose of calling for it if I did.
- Absolutely, the anxiety was absent; and since I had resolved not to force
- the bottle upon myself, but to give the Jolly Doctor and his drug all
- proper show to gain a victory, I made no alcohol demands. All this was
- years ago, and from that hour until now, when I write these lines, I&rsquo;ve
- neither taken nor wanted alcohol. I&rsquo;ve gone freely where it was, and abode
- for hours at tables when others poured and tossed it off; for myself I&rsquo;ve
- craved none and taken none.
- </p>
- <p>
- Toward the last of my stay, there came to dwell at the hostelry a goodly
- circle; one for a most part chance-sown. For days it had been snowing with
- a free, persistent hand; softly, industriously, indomitably fell the
- flakes, straight down and unflurried of a wind, until the cold light
- element lay about the tavern for a level depth of full three feet. It was
- the sort of weather in which one should read Whittier&rsquo;s Snow-Bound.
- </p>
- <p>
- Our circle, as snow-pent and held within door we drew about the tavern
- fire, offered a chequered citizenry. On the earliest occasion of our
- comradeship, while the snow sifted about the old-fashioned panes and
- showed through them with the whiteness of milk, I cast my eye over the
- group to collect for myself a mental picture of my companions.
- </p>
- <p>
- At the right hand of the Jolly Doctor, solid in his arm chair, sat a Red
- Nosed Gentleman. He showed prosperous of this world&rsquo;s goods and owned to a
- warm weakness for burgundy. He was particular to keep ever a bottle at his
- elbow, and constantly supported his interest in what was current with a
- moderate glass.
- </p>
- <p>
- In sharpest contrast to the Red Nosed Gentleman there should be mentioned
- a gray old gentleman of sour and forbidding eye. The Jolly Doctor, who had
- known him for long, gave me in a whisper his story. This Sour Gentleman,
- like the Red Nosed Gentleman, had half retired from the cares of business.
- The Red Nosed Gentleman in his later days had been a stock speculator, as
- in sooth had the Sour Gentleman, and each would still on occasion carry a
- few thousand shares for a week or two and then swoop on a profit with
- quite the eagerness of any hawk on any hen.
- </p>
- <p>
- Not to be overlooked, in a corner nearest the chimney was a seamed white
- old figure, tall and spare, yet with vigorous thews still strung in the
- teeth of his all but four score years. He was referred to during our
- amiable captivity, and while we sate snow-locked about the mighty
- fire-place, as the Old Cattleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- Half comrade and half ward, our Old Cattleman had with him a taciturn,
- grave individual, to whom he gave the title of &ldquo;Sioux Sam,&rdquo; and whose
- father, he informed us, had been a French trader from St. Louis, while his
- mother was a squaw of the tribe that furnished the first portion of his
- name.
- </p>
- <p>
- As we brought arm chairs about the fire-place on our first snow-bound
- evening, moved possibly by the Red Nosed Gentleman&rsquo;s burgundy, which that
- florid person had urged upon his attention, the Jolly Doctor set the
- little community a good story-telling example.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This story, I should premise,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, mollifying certain
- rawnesses of his throat with a final glass of the Red Nosed Gentleman&rsquo;s
- burgundy, &ldquo;belongs to no experience of my own. I shall tell it as it was
- given me. It speaks broadly of the west and of the folk of cows and the
- Indians, and was set uppermost in my memory by the presence of our western
- friends.&rdquo; Here the Jolly Doctor indicated the Old Cattleman and that
- product of the French fur trader and his Indian wife, Sioux Sam, by a
- polite wave of his glass. Then tossing off the last of his burgundy he,
- without tedious preliminary, struck into his little history.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0002" id="link2HCH0002"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER II.&mdash;THE WINNING OF SAUCY PAOLI.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">G</span>ray Wolf sits
- within the shadow of the agency cottonwood and puffs unhappy kinnikinic
- from his red stone pipe. Heavy, dull and hot lies the August afternoon;
- heavy, dull and hot lies the heart of Gray Wolf. There is a profound grief
- at his soul&rsquo;s roots. The Indian&rsquo;s is not a mobile face. In full expression
- it is capable only of apathy or rage. If your Indian would show you mirth
- or woe, he must eke out the dim and half-told story with streaks of paint.
- But so deep is the present sorrow of Gray Wolf that, even without the aid
- of graphic ochre, one reads some shadow of it in the wrinkled brows and
- brooding eyes.
- </p>
- <p>
- What is this to so beat upon our dismal Osage? There is a dab of mud in
- his hair; his blanket is rags, and his moccasins are rusty and worn. These
- be weeds of mourning. Death has crept to the tepee of Gray Wolf and taken
- a prey. It was Catbird, the squaw of Gray Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- However, his to-day&rsquo;s sadness is not for the departed Catbird. He married
- her without laughter, and saw her pass without tears, as became a man and
- an Osage. When her breath was gone, the women combed her hair and dressed
- her in new, gay clothes, and burned the sacred cedar. Gray Wolf, after the
- usage of his fathers, seated her&mdash;knees to chin&mdash;on yonder
- hilltop, wrapped her in rawhides, and, as against the curiosity of coyotes
- and other prowling vermin of the night, budded her solidly about and over
- with heavy stones. You may see the rude mausole, like some tumbledown
- chimney, from the agency door. That was a moon ago. Another will go by;
- Gray Wolf will lay off his rags and tatters, comb the clay from his hair,
- and give a dance to show that he mourns no more. No, it is not the lost
- Catbird&mdash;good squaw though she was&mdash;that embitters the tobacco
- and haunts the moods of Gray Wolf. It is something more awful than death&mdash;that
- merest savage commonplace; something to touch the important fiber of
- pride.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gray Wolf is proud, as indeed he has concern to be. Not alone is he
- eminent as an Osage; he is likewise an eminent Indian. Those two thin
- ragged lines of blue tattoo which, on each side from the point of the jaw,
- run downward on the neck until they disappear beneath his blanket, prove
- Gray Wolf&rsquo;s elevation. They are the marks of an aboriginal nobility
- whereof the paleface in his ignorance knows nothing. Thirty Indians in all
- the tribes may wear these marks. And yet, despite such signs of respect,
- Gray Wolf has become the subject of acrid tribal criticism; and he feels
- it like the edge of a knife.
- </p>
- <p>
- Keats was quill-pricked to death by critics. But Keats was an Englishman
- and a poet. Petronius Arbiter, Nero&rsquo;s minion, was also criticised; despite
- the faultfinder, however, he lived in cloudless merry luxury, and died
- laughing. But Petronius was a Roman and an epicure. Gray Wolf is to gain
- nothing by these examples. He would not die like the verse maker, he could
- not laugh like the consul; there is a gulf between Gray Wolf and these as
- wide as the width of the possible. Gray Wolf is a stoic, and therefore
- neither so callous nor so wise as an epicure. Moreover, he is a savage and
- not a poet. Petronius came to be nothing better than an appetite; Gray
- Wolf rises to the heights of an emotion. Keats was a radical of
- sensibility, ransacking a firmament; Gray Wolf is an earthgoing
- conservative&mdash;a more stupendous Tory than any Bolingbroke. Of the
- two, while resembling neither, Gray Wolf comes nearer the poet than the
- Sybarite, since he can feel.
- </p>
- <p>
- Let it be remarked that Osage criticism is no trivial thing. It is so far
- peculiar that never a word or look, or even a detractory shrug is made to
- be its evidence. Your Osage tells no evil tales of you to his neighbor.
- His conduct goes guiltless of slanderous syllable or gesture. But he
- criticises you in his heart; he is strenuous to think ill of you; and by
- some fashion of telepathy you know and feel and burn with this tacit
- condemnation as much as ever you might from hot irons laid on your
- forehead. It is this criticism, as silent as it is general, that gnaws at
- Gray Wolf&rsquo;s heart and makes his somber visage more somber yet.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the week before when Gray Wolf, puffed of a vain conceit, matched
- Sundown, his pinto pony&mdash;swift as a winter wind, he deemed her&mdash;against
- a piebald, leggy roan, the property of Dull Ox, the cunning Ponca. The
- race had wide advertisement; it took shape between the Osages and the
- Poncas as an international event. Gray Wolf assured his tribe of victory;
- his Sundown was a shooting star, the roan a turtle; whereupon the Osages,
- ever ready as natural patriots to believe the worst Osage thing to be
- better than the best thing Ponca, fatuously wagered their substance on
- Sundown, even unto the beads on their moccasins.
- </p>
- <p>
- The race was run; the ubiquitous roan, fleeter than a shadow, went by poor
- Sundown as though she ran with hobbles on. Dull Ox won; the Poncas won.
- The believing Osages were stripped of their last blanket; and even as Gray
- Wolf sits beneath the agency cottonwood and writhes while he considers
- what his pillaged countrymen must think of him, the exultant Poncas are in
- the midst of a protracted spree, something in the nature of a scalp dance,
- meant to celebrate their triumph and emphasize the thoroughness wherewith
- the Osages were routed. Is it marvel, then, that Osage thought is full of
- resentment, or that Gray Wolf feels its sting?
- </p>
- <p>
- Over across from the moody Gray Wolf, Bill Henry lounges in the wide
- doorway of Florer&rsquo;s agency store. Bill Henry is young, about twenty-three,
- in truth. He has a quick, handsome face, with gray eyes that dance and
- gleam, and promise explosiveness of temper. The tan that darkens Bill
- Henry&rsquo;s skin wherever the sun may get to it, and which is comparable to
- the color of a saddle or a law book, testifies that the vivacious Bill is
- no recent importation. Five full years on the plains would be needed to
- ripen one to that durable hue.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill gazes out upon Gray Wolf as the latter sticks to the cottonwood&rsquo;s
- shade; a plan is running in the thoughts of Bill. There is call for change
- in Bill&rsquo;s destinies, and he must have the Gray Wolf&rsquo;s consent to what he
- bears in mind.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill has followed cattle since he turned his back on Maryland, a quintet
- of years before, and pushed westward two thousand miles to commence a
- career. Bill&rsquo;s family is of that aristocracy which adorns the &ldquo;Eastern
- Shore&rdquo; of Lord Baltimore&rsquo;s old domain. His folk are of consequence, and
- intended that Bill should take a high position. Bill&rsquo;s mother, an ardent
- church woman, had a pulpit in her thoughts for Bill; his father, more of
- the world, urged on his son the law. But Bill&rsquo;s bent was towards the laws
- neither of heaven nor of men. The romantic overgrew the practical in his
- nature. He leaned not to labor, whether mental or physical, and he liked
- danger and change and careless savageries.
- </p>
- <p>
- Civilization is artificial; it is a creature of convention, of clocks, of
- hours, of an unending procession of sleep, victuals and work. Bill
- distasted such orderly matters and felt instinctive abhorrence therefor.
- The day in and day out effort called for to remain civilized terrified
- Bill; his soul gave up the task before it was begun.
- </p>
- <p>
- But savagery? Ah, that was different! Savagery was natural, easy and
- comfortable to the very heart&rsquo;s blood of Bill, shiftless and wild as it
- ran. Bill was an instance of what wise folk term &ldquo;reversion to type,&rdquo; and
- thus it befell, while his father tugged one way and his mother another,
- Bill himself went suddenly from under their hands, fled from both altar
- and forum, and never paused until he found himself within the generous
- reaches of the Texas Panhandle. There, as related, and because savagery
- cannot mean entire idleness, Bill gave himself to a pursuit of cows, and
- soon had moderate fame as a rider, a roper, a gambler, and a quick, sure
- hand with a gun, and for whatever was deemed excellent in those regions
- wherein he abode.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill&rsquo;s presence among the Osages is the upcome of a dispute which fell
- forth between Bill and a comrade in a barroom of Mobeetie. Bill and the
- comrade aforesaid played at a device called &ldquo;draw poker;&rdquo; and Bill, in
- attempting to supply the deficiencies of a four flush with his six
- shooter, managed the other&rsquo;s serious wounding. This so shook Bill&rsquo;s
- standing in the Panhandle, so marked him to the common eye as a boy of
- dangerous petulance, that Bill sagely withdrew between two days; and now,
- three hundred miles to the north and east, he seeks among the Indians for
- newer pastures more serene.
- </p>
- <p>
- When we meet him Bill has been with the Osages the space of six weeks. And
- already he begins to doubt his welcome. Not that the Osages object. Your
- Indian objects to nothing that does not find shape as an immediate
- personal invasion of himself. But the government agent&mdash;a stern,
- decisive person&mdash;likes not the presence of straggling whites among
- his copper charges; already has he made intimation to Bill that his Osage
- sojourn should be short. Any moment this autocrat may despatch his marshal
- to march Bill off the reservation.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill does not enjoy the outlook. Within the brief frontiers of those six
- weeks of his visit, Bill has contracted an eager fondness for Osage life.
- Your Indian is so far scriptural that he taketh scant heed of the morrow,
- and believeth with all his soul that sufficient unto the day is the evil
- thereof. Here was a program to dovetail with those natural moods of Bill.
- His very being, when once it understood, arose on tiptoe to embrace it.
- Bill has become an Osage in his breast; as he poses with listless grace in
- Florer&rsquo;s portals, he is considering means whereby he may manage a jointure
- with the tribe, and become in actual truth a member.
- </p>
- <p>
- There is but one door to his coming; Bill must wed his way into Osage
- citizenship. He must take a daughter of the tribe to wife; turn &ldquo;squaw
- man,&rdquo; as it is called. Then will Bill be a fullblown Osage; then may no
- agent molest him or make him afraid.
- </p>
- <p>
- This amiable plot, as he lounges in Florer&rsquo;s door, is already decided upon
- by Bill. His fancy has even pitched upon the damsel whom he will honor
- with the title of &ldquo;Mrs. Bill.&rdquo; It is this selection that produces Gray
- Wolf as a factor in Bill&rsquo;s intended happiness, since Gray Wolf is the
- parent of the Saucy Paoli, to whom Bill&rsquo;s hopes are turned. Bill must meet
- and treat with Gray Wolf for his daughter, discover her &ldquo;price,&rdquo; and pay
- it.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0004" id="linkimage-0004"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0027.jpg" alt="0027 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0027.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- As to the lady herself and her generous consent when once her father is
- won, Bill harbors no misgivings. He believes too well of his handsome
- person; moreover, has he not demonstrated in friendly bout, on foot and on
- horseback, his superiority to the young Osage bucks who would pit
- themselves against him? Has he not out-run, out-wrestled and out-ridden
- them? And at work with either rifle, six-shooter or knife, has he not
- opened their eyes? Also, he has conquered them at cards; and their money
- and their ponies and their gewgaws to a healthful value are his as spoils
- thereof.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill is all things that a lady of sensibility should love; and for that on
- those two or three occasions when he came unexpectedly upon her, the Saucy
- Paoli dodged within the ancestral lodge to daub her nose and cheeks with
- hurried yet graceful red, thereby to improve and give her beauties point,
- Bill knows he has touched her heart. Yes, forsooth! Bill feels sure of the
- Saucy Paoli; it is Gray Wolf, somber of his late defeat by the wily Dull
- Ox and the evanescent roan, toward whom his apprehensions turn their face.
- The more, perhaps, since Bill himself, not being a blinded Osage, and
- having besides some certain wit concerning horses, scrupled not to wager
- and win on the Ponca entry, and against the beloved Sundown of his
- father-in-law to come. It is the notion that Gray Wolf might resent this
- apostasy that breeds a half pause in Bill&rsquo;s optimism as he loafs in
- Florer&rsquo;s door.
- </p>
- <p>
- As Bill stands thus musing, the Saucy Paoli goes by. The Saucy Paoli is
- light, pretty, round and wholesome, and she glances with shy, engaging
- softness on Bill from eyes as dark and big and deep as a deer&rsquo;s. Is it not
- worth while to wed her? The Osages are owners in fee of one million, five
- hundred thousand acres of best land; they have eight even millions of
- dollars stored in the Great Father&rsquo;s strong chests in Washington; they are
- paid each one hundred and forty dollars by their fostering Great Father as
- an annual present; and the head of the house draws all for himself and his
- own. Marriage will mean an instant yearly income of two hundred and eighty
- dollars; moreover, there may come the profitable papoose, and with each
- such a money augmentation of one hundred and forty dollars. And again,
- there are but sixteen hundred Osages told and counted; and so would Bill
- gain a strong per cent, in the tribal domain and the tribal treasure.
- Altogether, a union with the fair, brown Saucy Paoli is a prospect fraught
- of sunshine; and so Bill wisely deems it.
- </p>
- <p>
- For an hour it has leaped in Bill&rsquo;s thoughts as an impulse to go across to
- the spreading cottonwood, propose himself to the Gray Wolf for the Saucy
- Paoli, and elicit reply. It would not be the Osage way, but Bill is not
- yet an Osage, and some reasonable allowance should be made by Gray Wolf
- for the rudeness of a paleface education. Such step would earn an answer,
- certain and complete. Your savage beateth not about the bush. His
- diplomacy is Bismarckian; it is direct and proceeds by straight lines.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus chase Bill&rsquo;s cogitations when the sudden sight of the Saucy Paoli and
- her glances, full of wist and warmth, fasten his gallant fancy and
- crystalize a resolution to act at once.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How!&rdquo; observes Bill, by way of salutation, as he stands before Gray Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- That warrior grunts swinish, though polite, response. Then Bill goes
- directly to the core of his employ; he explains his passion, sets forth
- his hopes, and by dashing swoops arrives at the point which, according to
- Bill&rsquo;s blunt theories, should quicken the interest of Gray Wolf, and says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now, what price? How many ponies?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How many you give?&rdquo; retorts the cautious Gray Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Fifteen.&rdquo; Bill stands ready to go to thirty.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Ugh!&rdquo; observes Gray Wolf, and then he looks out across the prairie
- grasses where the thick smoke shows the summer fires to be burning them
- far away.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thirty ponies,&rdquo; says Bill after a pause.
- </p>
- <p>
- These or their money equivalent&mdash;six hundred dollars&mdash;Bill knows
- to be a fat figure. He believes Gray Wolf will yield.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Bill is in partial error. Gray Wolf is not in any sordid, money frame.
- Your savage is a sentimentalist solely on two matters: those to touch his
- pride and those to wake his patriotism. And because of the recent triumph
- of the Poncas, and the consequent censures upon him now flaming, though
- hidden, in the common Osage heart, Gray Wolf&rsquo;s pride is raw and throbbing.
- He looks up at Bill where he waits.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;One pony!&rdquo; says Gray Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;One?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But it must beat the Ponca&rsquo;s roan.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Four hundred miles to the westward lie the broad ranges of the
- Triangle-Dot. Throughout all cow-land the ponies of the Triangle-Dot have
- name for speed. As far eastward as the Panhandle and westward to the
- Needles, as far southward as Seven Rivers and northward to the Spanish
- Peaks, has their fame been flung. About camp fires and among the boys of
- cows are tales told of Triangle-Dot ponies that overtake coyotes and
- jack-rabbits. More, they are exalted as having on a time raced even with
- an antelope. These ponies are children of a blue-grass sire, as
- thoroughbred as ever came out of Kentucky. Little in size, yet a ghost to
- go; his name was Redemption. These speedy mustang babies of Redemption
- have yet to meet their master in the whole southwest. And Bill knows of
- them; he has seen them run.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;In two moons, my father,&rdquo; says Bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- There is much creaking of saddle leathers; there is finally a deep dig in
- the flanks by the long spurs, and Bill, mounted on his best, rides out of
- Pauhauska. His blankets are strapped behind, his war bags bulge with
- provand, he is fully armed; of a verity, Bill meditates a journey. Four
- hundred miles&mdash;and return&mdash;no less, to the ranges of the
- Triangle-Dot.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gray Wolf watches from beneath the cottonwood that already begins to throw
- its shadows long; his eyes follow Bill until the latter&rsquo;s broad brimmed,
- gray sombrero disappears on the hill-crests over beyond Bird River.
- </p>
- <p>
- It skills not to follow Bill in this pilgrimage. He fords rivers; he sups
- and sleeps at casual camps; now and again he pauses for the night at some
- chance plaza of the Mexicans; but first and last he pushes ever on and on
- at a round road gait, and with the end he has success.
- </p>
- <p>
- Within his time by full three weeks Bill is again at the agency of the
- Osages; and with him comes a pony, lean of muzzle, mild of eye, wide of
- forehead, deep of lung, silken of mane, slim of limb, a daughter of the
- great Redemption; and so true and beautiful is she in each line she seems
- rather for air than earth. And she is named the Spirit.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gray Wolf goes over the Spirit with eye and palm. He feels her velvet
- coat; picks up one by one her small hoofs, polished and hard as agate.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Spirit has private trial with Sundown and leaves that hopeless cayuse
- as if the latter were pegged to the prairie.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Ugh!&rdquo; says Gray Wolf, at the finish. &ldquo;Heap good pony!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Your savage is not a personage of stopwatches, weights and records. At the
- best, he may only guess concerning a pony&rsquo;s performance. Also his vanity
- has wings, though his pony has none, and once he gets it into his savage
- head that his pony can race, it is never long ere he regards him as
- invincible. Thus is it with Dull Ox and his precious roan. That besotted
- Ponca promptly accepts the Gray Wolf challenge for a second contest.
- </p>
- <p>
- The day arrives. The race is to be run on the Osage course&mdash;a quarter
- of a mile, straight-away&mdash;at the Pauhauska agency. Two thousand
- Osages and Poncas are gathered together. There is no laughter, no uproar,
- no loud talk; all is gravity, dignity and decorum. The stakes are one
- thousand dollars a side, for Gray Wolf and Dull Ox are opulent pagans.
- </p>
- <p>
- The ponies are brought up and looked over. The fires of a thousand racing
- ancestors burn in the eyes of the Spirit; the Poncas should take warning.
- But they do not; wagers run higher. The Osages have by resolution of their
- fifteen legislators brought the public money to the field. Thus they are
- rich for speculation, where, otherwise, by virtue of former losses, they
- would be helpless with empty hands.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bet after bet is made. The pool box is a red blanket spread on the grass.
- It is presided over by a buck, impecunious but of fine integrity.
- </p>
- <p>
- Being moneyless, he will make no bet himself; being honest, he will
- faithfully guard the treasure put within his care. A sporting buck
- approaches the blanket; he grumbles a word or two in the ear of the pool
- master who sits at the blanket&rsquo;s head; then he searches forth a
- hundred-dollar bill from the darker recesses of his blanket and lays it on
- the red betting-cloth. Another comes up; the pool master murmurs the name
- of the pony on which the hundred is offered; it is covered by the second
- speculator; that wager is complete. Others arrive at the betting blanket;
- its entire surface becomes dotted with bank notes&mdash;two and two they
- lie together, each wagered against the other. The blanket is covered and
- concealed with the money piled upon it. One begins to wonder how a winner
- is to know his wealth. There will be no clash, no dispute. Savages never
- cheat; and each will know his own. Besides, there is the poverty-eaten,
- honest buck, watching all, to be appealed to should an accidental
- confusion of wagers occur.
- </p>
- <p>
- On a bright blanket, a trifle to one side&mdash;not to be under the
- moccasins of commerce, as it were&mdash;sits the Saucy Paoli. She is
- without motion; and a blanket, covering her from little head to little
- foot, leaves not so much as a stray lock or the tip of an ear for one&rsquo;s
- gaze to rest upon. The Saucy Paoli is present dutifully to answer the
- outcome of the Gray Wolf&rsquo;s pact with Bill. One wonders how does her heart
- beat, and how roam her hopes? Is she for the roan, or is she for the Glory
- of the Triangle-Dot?
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0005" id="linkimage-0005"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0041.jpg" alt="0041 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0041.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- The solemn judges draw their blankets about them and settle to their
- places. Three Poncas and three Osages on a side they are; they seat
- themselves opposite each other with twenty feet between. A line is drawn
- from trio to trio; that will serve as wire. The pony to cross first will
- be victor.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now all is ready! The rival ponies are at the head of the course; it will
- be a standing start. A grave buck sits in the saddle near the two racers
- and to their rear. He is the starter. Suddenly he cracks off a Winchester,
- skyward. It is the signal.
- </p>
- <p>
- The ponies leap like panthers at the sound. There is a swooping rush; for
- one hundred yards they run together, then the Spirit takes the lead.
- Swifter than the thrown lance, swift as the sped arrow she comes! With
- each instant she leaves and still further leaves the roan! What has such
- as the mongrel pony of the Poncas to do with the Flower of the
- Triangle-Dot? The Spirit flashes between the double triumvirate of judges,
- winner by fifty yards!
- </p>
- <p>
- And now one expects a shout. There is none. The losing Poncas and the
- triumphant Osages alike are stolid and dignified. Only Gray Wolf&rsquo;s eyes
- gleam, and the cords in his neck swell. He has been redeemed with his
- people; his honor has been returned; his pride can again hold up its head.
- But while his heart may bound, his face must be like iron. Such is the
- etiquette of savagery.
- </p>
- <p>
- Both Gray Wolf and the Osages will exult later, noisily, vociferously.
- There will be feasting and dancing. Now they must be grave and guarded,
- both for their own credit and to save their Ponca adversaries from a
- wound.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill turns and rides slowly back to the judges. The Spirit, daughter of
- Redemption, stands with fire eyes and tiger lily nostrils. Bill swings
- from the saddle. Gray Wolf throws off the blanket from the Saucy Paoli,
- where she waits, head bowed and silent. Her dress is the climax of Osage
- magnificence; the Saucy Paoli glows like a ruby against the dusk green of
- the prairie. Bill takes the Saucy Paoli&rsquo;s hand and raises her to her feet.
- </p>
- <p>
- She lifts her head. Her glance is shy, yet warm and glad. She hesitates.
- Then, as one who takes courage&mdash;just as might a white girl, though
- with less of art&mdash;she puts up her lips to be kissed.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now that is what I call a fair story,&rdquo; commented the Red Nosed Gentleman
- approvingly when the Jolly Doctor came to a pause; &ldquo;only I don&rsquo;t like that
- notion of a white man marrying an Indian. It&rsquo;s apt to keep alive in the
- children the worst characteristics of both races and none of the virtues
- of either.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now I don&rsquo;t know that,&rdquo; observed the Sour Gentleman, contentiously. &ldquo;In
- my own state of Virginia many of our best people are proud to trace their
- blood to Pocahontas, who was sold for a copper kettle. I, myself, am
- supposed to have a spoonful of the blood of that daughter of Powhatan in
- my veins; and while it is unpleasant to recall one&rsquo;s ancestress as having
- gone from hand to hand as the subject of barter and sale&mdash;and for no
- mighty price at that&mdash;I cannot say I would wish it otherwise. My
- Indian blood fits me very well. Did you say&rdquo;&mdash;turning to the Jolly
- Doctor&mdash;&ldquo;did you say, sir, you knew this young man who won the Saucy
- Paoli?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;No,&rdquo; returned the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;I am guiltless of acquaintance with him.
- The story came to me from one of our Indian agents.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- While this talk went forward, Sioux Sam, who understood English perfectly
- and talked it very well, albeit with a guttural Indian effect, and who had
- listened to the Jolly Doctor&rsquo;s story with every mark of interest, was
- saying something in a whisper to the Old Cattleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He tells me,&rdquo; remarked the Old Cattleman in reply to my look of
- curiosity, &ldquo;that if you-alls don&rsquo;t mind, he&rsquo;ll onfold on you a Injun tale
- himse&rsquo;f. It&rsquo;s one of these yere folk-lore stories, I suppose, as Doc Peets
- used to call &rsquo;em.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The whole company made haste to assure Sioux Sam that his proposal was
- deeply the popular one; thus cheered, our dark-skinned raconteur, first
- lighting his pipe with a coal from the great fireplace, issued forth upon
- his verbal journey.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; this,&rdquo; said Sioux Sam, lifting a dark finger to invoke attention and
- puffing a cloud the while, &ldquo;an&rsquo; this tale, which shows how Forked Tongue,
- the bad medicine man, was burned, must teach how never to let the heart
- fill up with hate like a pond with the rains, nor permit the tongue to go
- a crooked trail.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0003" id="link2HCH0003"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER III.&mdash;HOW FORKED TONGUE WAS BURNED.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>he time is long,
- long ago. Ugly Elk is the great chief of the Sioux, an&rsquo; he&rsquo;s so ugly an&rsquo;
- his face so hideous, he makes a great laugh wherever he goes. But the
- people are careful to laugh when the Ugly Elk&rsquo;s back is toward them. If
- they went in front of him an&rsquo; laugh, he&rsquo;d go among them with his stone
- war-axe; for Ugly Elk is sensitive about his looks.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ugly Elk is the warchief of the Sioux an&rsquo; keeps his camp on the high
- bluffs that mark the southern border of the Sioux country where he can
- look out far on the plains an&rsquo; see if the Pawnees go into the Sioux hills
- to hunt. Should the Pawnees try this, then Ugly Elk calls up his young men
- an&rsquo; pounces on the Pawnees like a coyote on a sage hen, an&rsquo; when Ugly Elk
- gets through, the Pawnees are hard to find.
- </p>
- <p>
- It turns so, however, that the Pawnees grow tired. Ugly Elk&rsquo;s war yell
- makes their knees weak, an&rsquo; when they see the smoke of his fire they turn
- an&rsquo; run. Then Ugly Elk has peace in his tepees on the bluffs, an&rsquo; eats an&rsquo;
- smokes an&rsquo; counts his scalps an&rsquo; no Pawnee comes to anger him. An&rsquo; the
- Sioux look up to him as a mighty fighter, an&rsquo; what Ugly Elk says goes as
- law from east to west an&rsquo; no&rsquo;th to south throughout the country of the
- Sioux.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ugly Elk has no sons or daughters an&rsquo; all his squaws are old an&rsquo; dead an&rsquo;
- asleep forever in their rawhides, high on pole scaffolds where the wolves
- can&rsquo;t come. An&rsquo; because Ugly Elk is lonesome an&rsquo; would hear good words
- about his lodge an&rsquo; feel that truth is near, he asks his nephew, Running
- Water, to live with him when now the years grow deep an&rsquo; deeper on his
- head. The nephew is named Running Water because there is no muddiness of
- lies about him, an&rsquo; his life runs clear an&rsquo; swift an&rsquo; good. Some day
- Running Water will be chief, an&rsquo; then they will call him Kill-Bear,
- because he once sat down an&rsquo; waited until a grizzly came up; an&rsquo; when he
- had come up, Running Water offered him the muzzle of his gun to bite; an&rsquo;
- then as the grizzly took it between his jaws, Running Water blew off his
- head. An&rsquo; for that he was called Kill-Bear, an&rsquo; made chief. But that is
- not for a long time, an&rsquo; comes after Ugly Elk has died an&rsquo; been given a
- scaffold of poles with his squaws.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ugly Elk has his heart full of love for Running Water an&rsquo; wants him ever
- in his sight an&rsquo; to hear his voice. Also, he declares to the Sioux that
- they must make Running Water their chief when he is gone. The Sioux say
- that if he will fight the Pawnees, like Ugly Elk, until the smoke of his
- camp is the smoke of fear to the Pawnees, he shall be their chief. An&rsquo;
- because Running Water is as bold as he is true, Ugly Elk accepts the
- promise of the Sioux an&rsquo; rests content that all will be as he asks when
- his eyes close for the long sleep.
- </p>
- <p>
- But while Ugly Elk an&rsquo; Running Water are happy for each other, there is
- one whose heart turns black as he looks upon them. It is Forked Tongue,
- the medicine man; he is the cousin of Ugly Elk, an&rsquo; full of lies an&rsquo;
- treachery. Also, he wants to be chief when that day comes for Ugly Elk to
- die an&rsquo; go away. Forked Tongue feels hate for Running Water, an&rsquo; he plans
- to kill him.
- </p>
- <p>
- Forked Tongue talks with Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, an&rsquo; who has once helped
- Forked Tongue with his medicine. Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is very wise;
- also he wants revenge on Forked Tongue, who promised him a bowl of
- molasses an&rsquo; then put a cheat on him.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Forked Tongue powwows with Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear thinks now he will
- have vengeance on Forked Tongue, who was false about the molasses.
- Thereupon, he rests his head on his paw, an&rsquo; makes as if he thinks an&rsquo;
- thinks; an&rsquo; after a long while he tells Forked Tongue what to do.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Follow my word,&rdquo; says Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;an&rsquo; it will bring success.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, doesn&rsquo;t say to whom &ldquo;success&rdquo; will come; nor
- does Forked Tongue notice because liars are ever quickest to believe, an&rsquo;
- there is no one so easy to deceive as a treacherous man. Forked Tongue
- leaves Moh-Kwa an&rsquo; turns to carry out his su&rsquo;gestions.
- </p>
- <p>
- Forked Tongue talks to Ugly Elk when they&rsquo;re alone an&rsquo; touches his
- feelings where they&rsquo;re sore.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The Running Water laughs at you,&rdquo; says Forked Tongue to Ugly Elk. &ldquo;He
- says you are more hideous than a gray gaunt old wolf, an&rsquo; that he must
- hold his head away when you an&rsquo; he are together. If he looked at you, he
- says, you are so ugly he would laugh till he died.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then the Ugly Elk turned to fire with rage.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How will you prove that?&rdquo; says Ugly Elk to Forked Tongue.
- </p>
- <p>
- Forked Tongue is ready, for Moh-Kwa has foreseen the question of Ugly Elk.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You may prove it for yourself,&rdquo; says Forked Tongue. &ldquo;When you an&rsquo; Running
- Water are together, see if he does not turn away his head.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That night it is as Forked Tongue said. Running Water looks up at the top
- of the lodge, or down at the robes on the ground, or he turns his back on
- Ugly Elk; but he never once rests his eyes on Ugly Elk or looks him in the
- face. An&rsquo; the reason is this: Forked Tongue has told Running Water that
- Ugly Elk complained that Running Water&rsquo;s eye was evil; that his medicine
- told him this; an&rsquo; that he asked Forked Tongue to command Running Water
- not to look on him, the Ugly Elk, for ten wakes an&rsquo; ten sleeps, when the
- evil would have gone out of his eye.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; the Ugly Elk,&rdquo; says Forked Tongue, &ldquo;would tell you this himse&rsquo;f, but
- he loves you so much it would make his soul sick, an&rsquo; so he asks me.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Running Water, who is all truth, does not look for lies in any mouth, an&rsquo;
- believes Forked Tongue, an&rsquo; resolves for ten sleeps an&rsquo; ten wakes not to
- rest his eyes on Ugly Elk.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Ugly Elk notices how Running Water will not look on him, he chokes
- with anger, for he remembers he is hideous an&rsquo; believes that Running Water
- laughs as Forked Tongue has told him. An&rsquo; he grows so angry his mind is
- darkened an&rsquo; his heart made as night. He seeks out the Forked Tongue an&rsquo;
- says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Because I am weak with love for him, I cannot kill him with my hands.
- What shall I do, for he must die?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Forked Tongue makes a long think an&rsquo; as if he is hard at work inside
- his head. Then he gives this counsel to Ugly Elk:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Send to your hunters where they are camped by the river. Say to them by
- your runner to seize on him who comes first to them in the morning, an&rsquo;
- tie him to the big peeled pine an&rsquo; burn him to death with wood. When the
- runner is gone, say to Running Water that he must go to the hunters when
- the sun wakes up in the east an&rsquo; ask them if they have killed an&rsquo; cooked
- the deer you sent them. Since he will be the first to come, the hunters
- will lay hands on Running Water an&rsquo; tie him an&rsquo; burn him; an&rsquo; that will
- put an end to his jests an&rsquo; laughter over your ugliness.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Ugly Elk commands the Antelope, his runner, to hurry with word to the
- hunters to burn him to death who shall come first to them in the morning.
- Then he makes this word to Running Water that he must go to the hunters
- when the sun comes up an&rsquo; ask if they have killed an&rsquo; cooked the deer he
- sent them. Ugly Elk scowls like a cloud while he gives his directions to
- Running Water, but the boy does not see since his eyes are on the ground.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the sun comes up, Running Water starts with the word of Ugly Elk to the
- hunters. But Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is before him for his safety. Moh-Kwa
- knows that the way to stop a man is with a woman, so he has brought a
- young squaw of the lower Yellowstone who is so beautiful that her people
- named her the Firelight. Moh-Kwa makes the Firelight pitch camp where the
- trail of Running Water will pass as he goes to the hunters. An&rsquo; the Wise
- Bear tells her what to say; an&rsquo; also to have a turkey roasted, an&rsquo; a pipe
- an&rsquo; a soft blanket ready for Running Water.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Running Water sees the Firelight, she is so beautiful he thinks it is
- a dream. An&rsquo; when she asks him to eat, an&rsquo; fills the redstone pipe an&rsquo;
- spreads a blanket for him, the Running Water goes no further. He smokes
- an&rsquo; rests on the blanket; an&rsquo; because the tobacco is big medicine, Running
- Water falls asleep with his head in the lap of the Firelight.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Forked Tongue knows that Running Water has started for the hunters,
- he waits. Then he thinks:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now the hunters, because I have waited long, have already burned Running
- Water. An&rsquo; I will go an&rsquo; see an&rsquo; bring back one of the shin-bones to show
- Ugly Elk that he will never return.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Forked Tongue travels fast; an&rsquo; as he runs by the lodge of the Firelight,
- while it is a new lodge to him, he does not pause, for the lodge is closed
- so that the light will not trouble Running Water where he lies asleep with
- his head in the lap of the Firelight.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is behind a tree as Forked Tongue trots past, an&rsquo;
- he laughs deep in his hairy bosom; for Moh-Kwa likes revenge, an&rsquo; he
- remembers how he was cheated of his bowl of molasses.
- </p>
- <p>
- Forked Tongue runs by Moh-Kwa like a shadow an&rsquo; never sees him, an&rsquo; cannot
- hear him laugh.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Forked Tongue comes to the hunters, they put their hands on him an&rsquo;
- tie him to the peeled pine tree. As they dance an&rsquo; shout an&rsquo; pile the
- brush an&rsquo; wood about him, Forked Tongue glares with eyes full of fear an&rsquo;
- asks: &ldquo;What is this to mean?&rdquo; The hunters stop dancing an&rsquo; say: &ldquo;It means
- that it is time to sing the death song.&rdquo; With that they bring fire from
- their camp an&rsquo; make a blaze in the twigs an&rsquo; brush about Forked Tongue;
- an&rsquo; the flames leap up as if eager to be at him&mdash;for fire hates a
- liar&mdash;an&rsquo; in a little time Forked Tongue is burned away an&rsquo; only the
- ashes are left an&rsquo; the big bones, which are yet white hot.
- </p>
- <p>
- The sun is sinking when Running Water wakes an&rsquo; he is much dismayed; but
- the Firelight cheers him with her dark eyes, an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa comes from behind
- the tree an&rsquo; gives him good words of wisdom; an&rsquo; when he has once more
- eaten an&rsquo; drunk an&rsquo; smoked, he kisses the Firelight an&rsquo; goes forward to
- the hunters as the Ugly Elk said.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0006" id="linkimage-0006"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0055.jpg" alt="0055 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0055.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; when he comes to them, he asks:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Have you killed an&rsquo; cooked the deer which was sent you by the Ugly Elk?&rdquo;
- An&rsquo; the hunters laugh an&rsquo; say: &ldquo;Yes; he is killed an&rsquo; cooked.&rdquo; Then they
- take him to the peeled pine tree, an&rsquo; tell him of Forked Tongue an&rsquo; his
- fate; an&rsquo; after cooling a great shin-bone in the river, they wrap it in
- bark an&rsquo; grass an&rsquo; say:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Carry that to the Ugly Elk that he may know his deer is killed an&rsquo;
- cooked.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- While he is returning to Ugly Elk much disturbed, Moh-Kwa tells Running
- Water how Forked Tongue made his evil plan; an both Running Water when he
- hears, an&rsquo; Ugly Elk when he hears, can hardly breathe for wonder. An&rsquo; the
- Ugly Elk cannot speak for his great happiness when now that Running Water
- is still alive an&rsquo; has not made a joke of his ugliness nor laughed. Also,
- Ugly Elk gives Moh-Kwa that bowl of molasses of which Forked Tongue would
- cheat him.
- </p>
- <p>
- The same day, Moh-Kwa brings the Firelight to the lodge of Ugly Elk, an&rsquo;
- she an&rsquo; Running Water are wed; an&rsquo; from that time she dwells in the tepee
- of Running Water, even unto the day when he is named Kill-Bear an&rsquo; made
- chief after Ugly Elk is no more.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is ever,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, beaming from one to another to
- observe if we enjoyed Sioux Sam&rsquo;s story with as deep a zest as he did, &ldquo;it
- is ever a wondrous pleasure to meet with these tales of a primitive
- people. They are as simple as the romaunts invented and told by children
- for the amusement of each other, and yet they own something of a plot,
- though it be the shallowest.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Commonly, too, they teach a moral lesson,&rdquo; spoke up the Sour Gentleman,
- &ldquo;albeit from what I know of savage morals they would not seem to have had
- impressive effect upon the authors or their Indian listeners. You should
- know something of our Indians?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Here the Sour Gentleman turned to the Old Cattleman, who was rolling a
- fresh cigar in his mouth as though the taste of tobacco were a delight.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Me, savey Injuns?&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;Which I knows that much about
- Injuns it gets in my way.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What of their morals, then?&rdquo; asked the Sour Gentleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Plumb base. That is, they&rsquo;re plumb base when took from a paleface
- standp&rsquo;int. Lookin&rsquo; at &rsquo;em with the callous eyes of a savage, I
- reckons now they would mighty likely seem bleached a whole lot.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Discussion rambled to and fro for a time, and led to a learned
- disquisition on fables from the Jolly Doctor, they being, he said, the
- original literature of the world. With the end of it, however, there arose
- a request that the Sour Gentleman follow the excellent examples of the
- Jolly Doctor and Sioux Sam.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But I&rsquo;ve no invention,&rdquo; complained the Sour Gentleman. &ldquo;At the best I
- could but give you certain personal experiences of my own; and those, let
- me tell you, are not always to my credit.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now I&rsquo;ll wager,&rdquo; spoke up the Red Nosed Gentleman, &ldquo;now I&rsquo;ll wager a
- bottle of burgundy&mdash;and that reminds me I must send for another,
- since this one by me is empty&mdash;that your experiences are quite as
- glorious as my own; and yet, sir,&rdquo;&mdash;here the Red Nosed Gentleman
- looked hard at the Sour Gentleman as though defying him to the tiltyard&mdash;&ldquo;should
- you favor us, I&rsquo;ll even follow you, and forage in the pages of my own
- heretofore and give you a story myself.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That is a frank offer,&rdquo; chimed in the Jolly Doctor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;There is no fault to be found with the offer,&rdquo; said the Sour Gentleman;
- &ldquo;and yet, I naturally hesitate when those stories of myself, which my
- poverty of imagination would compel me to give you, are not likely to
- grace or lift me in your esteem.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And what now do you suppose should be the illustrative virtues of what
- stories I will offer when I tell you I am a reformed gambler?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- This query was put by the Red Nosed Gentleman. The information thrown out
- would seem to hearten the Sour Gentleman not a little.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Then there will be two black sheep at all events,&rdquo; said the Sour
- Gentleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Gents,&rdquo; observed the Old Cattleman, decisively, &ldquo;if it&rsquo;ll add to the
- gen&rsquo;ral encouragement, I&rsquo;ll say right yere that in Arizona I was allowed
- to be some heinous myse&rsquo;f. If this is to be a competition in iniquity, I
- aims to cut in on the play.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Encouraged,&rdquo; responded the Sour Gentleman, with just the specter of a
- vinegar smile, &ldquo;by the assurance that I am like to prove no more ebon than
- my neighbors, I see nothing for it save to relate of the riches I made and
- lost in queer tobacco. I may add, too, that this particular incident
- carries no serious elements of wrong; it is one of my cleanest pages, and
- displays me as more sinned against than sinning.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0004" id="link2HCH0004"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER IV.&mdash;THAT TOBACCO UPSET.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>hen the war was
- done and the battle flags of that confederacy which had been my sweetheart
- were rolled tight to their staves and laid away in mournful, dusty corners
- to moulder and be forgot, I cut those buttons and gold ends of braid from
- my uniform, which told of me as a once captain of rebels, and turned my
- face towards New York. I was twenty-one at the time; my majority arrived
- on the day when Lee piled his arms and surrendered to Grant at Appomatox.
- A captain at twenty-one? That was not strange, my friends, in a time when
- boys of twenty-two were wearing the wreath of a brigadier. The war was
- fought by boys, not men;&mdash;like every other war. Ah! I won my rank
- fairly, saber in fist; so they all said.
- </p>
- <p>
- Those were great days. I was with O&rsquo;Ferrell. There are one hundred miles
- in the Shenandoah, and backwards and forwards I&rsquo;ve fought on its every
- foot. Towards the last, each day we fought, though both armies could see
- the end. We, for our side, fought with the wrath of despair; the Federals,
- with the glow of triumph in plain sight. Each day we fought; for if we did
- not go riding down the valley hunting Sheridan, the sun was never
- over-high when he rode up the valley hunting us. Those were brave days! We
- fought twice after the war was done. Yes, we knew of Richmond&rsquo;s fall and
- that the end was come. But what then? There was the eager foe; there were
- we, sullen and ripe and hot with hate. Why should we not fight? So it
- befell that I heard those gay last bugles that called down the last grim
- charge; so it came that I, with my comrades, made the last gray line of
- battle for a cause already lost, and fought round the last standards of a
- confederacy already dead. Those were, indeed, good days&mdash;those last
- scenes were filled with the best and bravest of either side.
- </p>
- <p>
- No; I neither regret nor repent the rebellion; nor do I grieve for
- rebellion&rsquo;s failure. All&rsquo;s well that well ends, and that carnage left us
- the better for it. For myself, I came honestly by my sentiments of the
- South. I was born in Virginia, of Virginians. One of my youthful
- recollections is how John Brown struck his blow at Harper&rsquo;s Ferry; how
- Governor Wise called out that company of militia of which I was a member;
- and how, as we stood in the lamp-lighted Richmond streets that night,
- waiting to take the road for Harper&rsquo;s Ferry, an old grotesque farmerish
- figure rushed excitedly into our midst. How we laughed at the belligerent
- agriculturist! No, he was no farmer; he was Wilkes Booth who, with the
- first whisper of the news, had come hot foot from the stage of Ford&rsquo;s
- Theater in his costume of that night to have his part with us. But all
- these be other stories, and I started to tell, not of the war nor of days
- to precede it, but about that small crash in tobacco wherein I had
- disastrous part.
- </p>
- <p>
- When I arrived in New York my hopes were high, as youth&rsquo;s hopes commonly
- are. But, however high my hope, my pocket was light and my prospects
- nothing. Never will I forget how the mere sensation of the great city
- acted on me like a stimulant. The crowd and the breezy rush of things were
- as wine. Then again, to transplant a man means ever a multiplication of
- spirit. It was so with me; the world and the hour and I were all new
- together, and never have I felt more fervor of enterprise than came to me
- those earliest New York days. But still, I must plan and do some practical
- thing, for my dollars, like the hairs of my head, were numbered.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was my seventh New York morning. As I sat in the café of the Astor
- House, my eye was caught by a news paragraph. The Internal Revenue law,
- with its tax of forty cents a pound on tobacco, had gained a construction,
- and the department&rsquo;s reading of the law at once claimed my hungriest
- interest. No tobacco grown prior to the crop of &rsquo;66 was to be
- affected by the tax; that was the decision.
- </p>
- <p>
- Aside from my saber-trade as a cavalryman, tobacco was that thing whereof
- I exhaustively knew. I was a tobacco adept from the hour when the seed
- went into the ground, down to the perfumed moment when the perfect leaf
- exhaled in smoke. Moreover, I was aware of a trade matter in the nature of
- a trade secret, which might be made of richest import.
- </p>
- <p>
- During those five red years of war, throughout the tobacco regions of the
- south, planting and harvesting, though crippled, had still gone forward.
- The fires of battle and the moving lines of troops had only streaked those
- regions; they never wholly covered or consumed them. And wherever peace
- prevailed, the growing of tobacco went on. The harvests had been stored;
- there was no market&mdash;no method of getting the tobacco out. To be
- brief, as I read the internal revenue decision above quoted, on that Astor
- House morning, I knew that scattered up and down Virginia and throughout
- the rest of the kindom of tobacco, the crops of full five years were lying
- housed, mouldy and mildewed, for the most part, and therefore cheap to
- whoever came with money in his hands. For an hour I sat over my coffee and
- made a plan.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was a gentleman, an old college friend of my father. He was rich,
- avoided business and cared only for books. I had made myself known to him
- on the day of my arrival; he had asked me, over a glass of wine, to let
- him hear from me as time and my destinies took unto themselves direction.
- For my tobacco plan I must have money; and I could think of no one save my
- father&rsquo;s friend of the books.
- </p>
- <p>
- When I was shown into the old gentleman&rsquo;s library, I found him deeply held
- with Moore&rsquo;s Life of Byron. As he greeted me, he kept the volume in his
- left hand with finger shut in the page. Evidently he trusted that I would
- not remain long and that he might soon return to his reading.
- </p>
- <p>
- The situation chilled me; I began my story with slight belief that its end
- would be fortunate. I exposed my tobacco knowledge, laid bare my scheme of
- trade, and craved the loan of five thousand dollars on the personal
- security&mdash;not at all commercial&mdash;of an optimist of twenty-one,
- whose only employment had been certain boot-and-saddle efforts to
- overthrow the nation. I say, I had scant hope of obtaining the aid I
- quested. I suffered disappointment. I was dealing with a gentleman who,
- however much he might grudge me a few moments taken from Byron, was
- willing enough to help me with money. In truth, he seemed relieved when he
- had heard me through; and he at once signed a check with a fine flourish,
- and I came from his benevolent presence equipped for those tobacco
- experiments I contemplated.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is not required that I go with filmy detail into a re-count of my
- enterprise. I began safely and quietly; with my profits I extended myself;
- and at the end of eighteen months, I had so pushed affairs that I was on
- the highway to wealth and the firm station of a millionaire.
- </p>
- <p>
- I had personally and through my agents bought up those five entire
- war-crops of tobacco. Most of it was still in Virginia and the south, due
- to my order; much of it had been already brought to New York. By the
- simple process of steaming and vaporizing, I removed each trace of mould
- and mildew, and under my skillful methods that war tobacco emerged upon
- the market almost as sweet and hale as the best of our domestic stock; and
- what was vastly in its favor, its flavor was, if anything, a trifle mild.
- </p>
- <p>
- In that day of leaf tobacco, the commodity was marketed in
- one-hundred-pound bales. My bales were made with ninety-two pounds of war
- tobacco, sweated free of any touch of mildew; and eight pounds of new
- tobacco, the latter on the outside for the sake of color and looks. Thus
- you may glimpse somewhat the advantage I had. Where, at forty cents a
- pound, the others paid on each bale of tobacco a revenue charge of forty
- dollars, I, with only eight pounds of new tobacco, paid but three dollars
- and twenty cents. And I had cornered the exempted tobacco. Is it wonder I
- began to wax rich?
- </p>
- <p>
- Often I look over my account books of those brilliant eighteen months.
- When I read that news item on the Astor House morning I&rsquo;ve indicated, I
- had carefully modeled existence to a supporting basis of ten dollars a
- week. When eighteen months later there came the crash, I was permitting
- unto my dainty self a rate of personal expenditure of over thirty thousand
- dollars a year. I had apartments up-town; I was a member of the best
- clubs; I was each afternoon in the park with my carriage; incidentally I
- was languidly looking about among the Vere de Veres of the old
- Knickerbockers for that lady who, because of her superlative beauty and
- wit and modesty coupled with youth and station, was worthy to be my wife.
- Also, I recall at this period how I was conceitedly content with myself;
- how I gave way to warmest self-regard; pitied others as dullards and
- thriftless blunderers; and privily commended myself as a very Caesar of
- Commerce and the one among millions. Alas! &ldquo;Pride goeth&rdquo;&mdash;you have
- read the rest!
- </p>
- <p>
- It was a bright October afternoon. My cometlike career had subsisted for
- something like a year and a half; and I, the comet, was growing in size
- and brilliancy as time fled by. My tobacco works proper were over towards
- the East River in a brick warehouse I had leased; to these, which were
- under the superintendence of a trusty and expert adherent whom I had
- brought north from Richmond, I seldom repaired. My offices&mdash;five
- rooms, fitted and furnished to the last limit of rosewood and Russia
- leather magnificence&mdash;were down-town.
- </p>
- <p>
- On this particular autumn afternoon, as I went forth to my brougham for a
- roll to my apartments, the accountant placed in my hands a statement which
- I&rsquo;d asked for and which with particular exactitude set forth my business
- standing. I remember it exceeding well. As I trundled up-town that golden
- afternoon, I glanced at those additions and subtractions which told my
- opulent story. Briefly, my liabilities were ninety thousand dollars; and I
- was rich in assets to a money value of three hundred and twelve thousand
- dollars. The ninety thousand was or would be owing on my tobacco contracts
- south, and held those tons on tons of stored, mildewed war tobacco, solid
- to my command. As I read the totals and reviewed the items, I would not
- have paid a penny of premium to insure my future. There it was in black
- and white. I knew what I had done; I knew what I could do. I was master of
- the tobacco situation for the next three years to come. By that time, I
- would have worked up the entire fragrant stock of leaf exempt from the
- tax; also by that time, I would count my personal fortune at a shadow over
- three millions. There was nothing surer beneath the sun. At twenty-six I
- would retire from trade and its troubles; life would lie at my toe like a
- kick-ball, and I would own both the wealth and the supple youth to pursue
- it into every nook and corner of pleasurable experience. Thus ran my smug
- reflections as I rolled northward along Fifth avenue to dress for dinner
- on that bright October day.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the next afternoon, and I had concluded a pleasant lunch in my
- private office when Mike, my personal and favorite henchman, announced a
- visitor. The caller desired to see me on a subject both important and
- urgent.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Show him in!&rdquo; I said.
- </p>
- <p>
- There slouched into the room an awkward-seeming man of middle age; not
- poor, but roughly dressed. No one would have called him a fop; his
- clothes, far astern of the style, fitted vilely; while his head, never
- beautiful, was made uglier with a shock of rudely exuberant hair and a
- stubby beard like pig&rsquo;s bristles. It was an hour when there still remained
- among us, savages who oiled their hair; this creature was one; and I
- remember how the collar of his rusty surtout shone like glass with the
- dripped grease.
- </p>
- <p>
- My ill-favored visitor accepted the chair Mike placed for him and perched
- uneasily on its edge. When we were alone, I brought him and his business
- to instant bay. I was anxious to free myself of his presence. His bear&rsquo;s
- grease and jaded appearance bred a distaste of him.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What is it you want?&rdquo; My tones were brittle and sharp.
- </p>
- <p>
- The uncouth caller leered at me with a fashion of rancid leer&mdash;I
- suppose even a leer may have a flavor. Then he opened with obscure craft&mdash;vaguely,
- foggily. He wanted to purchase half my business. He would take an account
- of stock; give me exact money for one-half its value; besides, he would
- pay me a bonus of fifty thousand dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- If this unkempt barbarian had come squarely forth and told me his whole
- story; if, in short, I had known who he was and whom he came from, there
- would have grown no trouble. I would have gulped and swallowed the pill;
- we would have dealt; I&rsquo;d have had a partner and been worth one and
- one-half million instead of three millions when my fortune was made. But
- he didn&rsquo;t. He shuffled and hinted and leered, and said over and over again
- as he repeated his offer:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You need a partner.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But beyond this he did not go; and of this I could make nothing, and I
- felt nothing save a cumulative resentment that kept growing the larger the
- longer he stayed. I told him I desired none of his partnership. I told him
- this several divers times; and each time with added vigor and a rising
- voice. To the last he persistently and leeringly retorted his offer;
- always concluding, like another Cato, with his eternal Delenda est
- Carthago.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You need a partner!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Even my flatterers have never painted me as patient, and at twenty-three
- my pulse beat swift and hot. And it came to pass that on the heels of an
- acrid ten minutes of my visitor, I brought him bluntly up.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Go!&rdquo; I said. &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve heard all I care to hear. Go; or I&rsquo;ll have you shown
- the door!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was of no avail; the besotted creature held his ground.
- </p>
- <p>
- I touched a bell; the faithful Mike appeared. It took no more than a wave
- of the hand; Mike had studied me and knew my moods. At once he fell upon
- the invader and threw him down stairs with all imaginable spirit.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thereupon I breathed with vast relief, had the windows lifted because of
- bear&rsquo;s grease that tainted the air, and conferred on the valorous Celt a
- reward of two dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- Who was this ill-combed, unctuous, oily, cloudy, would-be partner? He was
- but a messenger; two months before he had resigned a desk in the
- Washington Treasury&mdash;for appearances only&mdash;to come to me and
- make the proffer. After Mike cast him forth, he brushed the dust from his
- knees and returned to Washington and had his treasury desk again. He was a
- mere go-between. The one he stood for and whose plans he sought to
- transact was a high official of revenue. This latter personage, of whose
- plotting identity back in the shadows I became aware only when it was too
- late, noting my tobacco operations and their profits and hawk-hungry for a
- share, had sent me the offer of partnership. I regret, for my sake as well
- as his own, that he did not pitch upon a more sagacious commissioner.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now fell the bolt of destruction. The morning following Mike&rsquo;s turgid
- exploits with my visitor, I was met in the office door by the manager. His
- face was white and his eyes seemed goggled and fixed as if their possessor
- had been planet-struck. I stared at him.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Have you read the news?&rdquo; he gasped.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What news?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Have you not read of the last order?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Over night&mdash;for my visitor, doubtless, wired his discomfiture&mdash;the
- Revenue Department had reversed its decision of two years before. The
- forty cents per pound of internal revenue would from that moment be
- demanded and enforced against every leaf of tobacco then or thereafter to
- become extant; and that, too, whether its planting and its reaping
- occurred inter arma or took place beneath the pinions of wide-spreading
- peace. The revenue office declared that its first ruling, exempting
- tobacco grown during the war, had been taken criminal advantage of; and
- that thereby the nation in its revenue rights had been sorely defeated and
- pillaged by certain able rogues&mdash;meaning me. Therefore, this new rule
- of revenue right and justice.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now the story ends. Under these changed, severe conditions, when I was
- made to meet a tax of forty dollars where I&rsquo;d paid less than a tithe of it
- before, I was helpless. I couldn&rsquo;t, with my inferior tobacco, engage on
- even terms against the new tobacco and succeed. My strength had dwelt in
- my power to undersell. This power was departed away; my locks as a Sampson
- were shorn.
- </p>
- <p>
- But why spin out the hideous story? My market was choked up; a cataract of
- creditors came upon me; my liabilities seemed to swell while my assets
- grew sear and shrunken. Under the shaking jolt of that last new revenue
- decision, my fortunes came tumbling like a castle of cards.
- </p>
- <p>
- After three months, I dragged myself from beneath the ruin of my affairs
- and stood&mdash;rather totteringly&mdash;on my feet again. I was out of
- business. I counted up my treasure and found myself, debtless and
- unthreatened, master of some twenty thousand dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- And what then? Twenty thousand dollars is not so bad. It is not three
- millions; nor even half of three millions; but when all is said, twenty
- thousand is not so bad! I gave up my rich apartments, sold my horses,
- looked no more for a female Vere de Vere with intent her to espouse, and
- turned to smuggling. I had now a personal as well as a regional grudge
- against government. The revenue had cheated me; I would in revenge cheat
- the revenue. I became a smuggler. That, however, is a tale to tell another
- day.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And now,&rdquo; observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, dipping deeply into his
- burgundy, as if for courage, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll even keep my promise. I&rsquo;ll tell a story
- of superstition and omen; also how I turned in my infancy to cards as a
- road to wealth. Cards as a method to arrive by riches is neither splendid
- nor respectable, but I shall make no apologies. I give you the story of
- The Sign of The Three.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0005" id="link2HCH0005"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER V.&mdash;THE SIGN OF THREE.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">S</span>uch confession may
- come grotesquely enough from one of education and substance, yet all the
- day long I&rsquo;ve been thinking on omens and on prophecies. It was my servant
- who brought it about. He, poor wretch! appeared in my chamber this morning
- with brows of terror and eyes of gloom. He had consulted a gypsy
- sorceress, whom the storm drove to cover in this tavern, and crossed the
- palm of her greed with a silver dollar to be told that he would die within
- the year. Information hardly worth the fee, truly! And the worst is, the
- shrinking fool believes the forebode and is already set about mending his
- lean estates for the change. What is still more strange, I, too, regard
- the word of this snow-blown witch&mdash;whoever the hag may be&mdash;and
- can no more eject her prophecies from my head than can the scared victim
- of them.
- </p>
- <p>
- This business of superstition&mdash;a weakness for the supernatural&mdash;belongs
- with our bone and blood. Reason is no shield from its assaults. Look at
- Sir Thomas More; chopped on Tower Hill because he would believe that the
- blessed wafers became of the Savior&rsquo;s actual flesh and blood! And yet, Sir
- Thomas wrote that most thoughtful of works, &ldquo;Utopia,&rdquo; and was cunning
- enough of a hard-headed politics to succeed Wolsey as Chancellor.
- </p>
- <p>
- Doubtless my bent to be superstitious came to me from my father. He was a
- miner; worked and lived on Tom&rsquo;s Run; and being from Wales, and spending
- his days in gloomy caverns of coal, held to those fantastic beliefs of his
- craft in elves and gnomes and brownies and other malignant, small folk of
- Demonland. However, it becomes not me to find fault with my ancestor nor
- speak lightly of his foibles. He was a most excellent parent; and it is
- one of my comforts, and one which neither my money nor my ease could
- bring, that I was ever a good son.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I say, my father was a miner of coal. Each morning while the mines were
- open, lamp in hat, he repaired deep within the tunneled belly of the hill
- across from our cottage and with pick and blast delved the day long. This
- mine was what is called a &ldquo;rail mine,&rdquo; and closed down its work each
- autumn to resume again in the spring. These beginnings and endings of mine
- activities depended on the opening and closing of navigation along the
- Great Lakes. When the lakes were open, the mines were open; when
- November&rsquo;s ice locked up the lakes, it locked up the mines as well, and my
- father and his fellows of the lamp were perforce idle until the warmth of
- returning spring again freed the keels and south breezes refilled the
- sails of commerce. As this gave my father but five to six months work a
- year; and as&mdash;at sixty cents a ton and pay for powder, oil, fuse and
- blacksmithing&mdash;he could make no more than forty dollars a month, we
- were poor enough.
- </p>
- <p>
- Even the scant money he earned we seldom really fingered. The little that
- was not cheated out of my father&rsquo;s hands by the sins of diamond screens
- and untrue weights and other company tricks, was pounced on in advance by
- the harpies of &ldquo;company store&rdquo; and &ldquo;company cottage,&rdquo; and what coins came
- to our touch never soared above the mean dignity of copper. Poor we were!
- a family of groats and farthings! poor as Lamb&rsquo;s &ldquo;obolary Jew!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It is not worth while for what I have in mind to dwell in sad extent on
- the struggles of my father or the aching shifts we made in my childhood to
- feed and clothe the life within our bodies. And yet, in body at least, I
- thrived thereby. I grew up strong and muscular; I boxed, wrestled and ran;
- was proficient as an athlete, and among other feats and for a slight wager&mdash;which
- was not made with my money, I warrant you!&mdash;swam eighteen miles in
- fresh water one Sunday afternoon.
- </p>
- <p>
- While my muscles did well enough, our poverty would have starved my mind
- were it not for the parish priest. The question of books and schools for
- me was far beyond my father&rsquo;s solution; he was eager that I be educated,
- but the emptiness of the family fisc forbade. It was then the good parish
- priest stepped forward and took me in earnest hand. Father Glennon deemed
- himself no little of an athlete, and I now believe that it was my
- supremacy in muscle among the boys of my age that first drew his eyes to
- me. Be that as it may, he took my schooling on himself; and night and day
- while I abode on Tom&rsquo;s Run&mdash;say until my seventeenth year&mdash;I was
- as tightly bound to the priest&rsquo;s books as ever Prometheus to his rock. And
- being a ready lad, I did my preceptor proud.
- </p>
- <p>
- The good priest is dead now; I sought to put a tall stone above him but
- the bishop refused because it was too rich a mark for the dust of an
- humble priest. I had my way in part, however; I bought the plot just
- across the narrow gravel walk from the grave that held my earliest, best
- friend, and there, registering on its smooth white surface my debt to
- Father Glennon, stands the shaft. I carved on it no explanation of the
- fact that it is only near and not over my good priest&rsquo;s bones. Those who
- turn curious touching that matter may wend to the bishop or to the sexton,
- and I now and then hear that they do.
- </p>
- <p>
- No; I did not go into the coal holes. My father forbade it, and I lacked
- the inclination as well. By nature I was a speculator, a gambler if you
- will. I like uncertainties; I would not lend money at five hundred per
- cent., merely because one knows in advance the measure of one&rsquo;s risks and
- profits. I want a chance to win and a chance to lose; for I hold with the
- eminent gamester Charles Fox that while to win offers the finest sensation
- of which the human soul is capable, the next finest comes when you lose.
- Congenitally I was a courtier of Fortune and a follower of the gospel of
- chance. And this inborn mood has carried me through a score of professions
- until, as I tell you this, I have grown rich and richer as a stock
- speculator, and hang over the markets a pure gambler of the tape. I make
- no apology; I simply point to the folk who surround me.
- </p>
- <p>
- My vocation of a gambler&mdash;for what else shall one call a speculator
- of stocks?&mdash;has doubtless fattened my tendencies towards the
- superstitious. I&rsquo;ve witnessed much surely, that should go to their
- strengthening. Let me tell you a story somewhat in line with the present
- current of my thoughts; it may reach some distance to teach you with
- Horatio that there be more things in heaven and earth than are dreamed of
- in our philosophy. After all, it is the cold record of one of a hundred
- score of incidents that encourage my natural belief in the occult.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- There is a gentleman of stocks&mdash;I&rsquo;ve known him twenty years&mdash;and
- he has a weakness for the numeral three. Just how far his worship of that
- sacred number enters into his business life no one may certainly tell; he
- is secretive and cautious and furnishes no evidence on the point that may
- be covered up. Yet this weakness, if one will call it so, crops up in
- sundry fashions. His offices are suite three, in number thirty-three Blank
- street; his telephones are 333 and 3339 respectively; his great
- undertakings are invariably deferred in their commencements until the
- third of the month.
- </p>
- <p>
- His peculiar and particular fetich, however, is a chain of three hundred
- and thirty-three gold beads. It is among the wonders of the street. This
- was made for him and under his direction by Tiffany, and cost one workman
- something over a year of his life in its construction. It is all hand and
- hammer work, this chain; and on each bead is drawn with delicate and
- finished art a gypsy girl&rsquo;s head. Under a microscope this gypsy face is
- perfect and the entire jewel worthy the boast of the Tiffany house as a
- finest piece of goldbeater&rsquo;s work turned out in modern times.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is a listless, warm evening at the Fifth Avenue Hotel. Our believer in
- &ldquo;Three&rdquo; is gathered casually with two of his friends. There is no business
- abroad; those missions which called our gentleman of the gypsy chain
- up-town are all discharged; he is off duty&mdash;unbuckled, as it were, in
- cheerful, light converse over a bottle of wine. Let us name our friend of
- the Three, &ldquo;James of the Beads;&rdquo; while his duo of comrades may be Reed and
- Rand respectively.
- </p>
- <p>
- Such is man&rsquo;s inconsistency that James of the Beads is railing at Reed who
- has told&mdash;with airs of veneration if not of faith&mdash;of a
- &ldquo;system,&rdquo; that day laid bare to him, warranted to discover in excellent
- rich advance, the names of the winning horses in next day&rsquo;s races. James
- of the Beads laughs, while Reed feebly defends his credulity in lending
- the countenance of half belief to the &ldquo;system&rdquo; he describes.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then a sudden impulse takes James of the Beads. His face grows grave while
- his eye shows deepest thought.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To-morrow is the third of the month?&rdquo; observes James of the Beads. Now
- with emphasis: &ldquo;Gentlemen, I&rsquo;ll show you how to select a horse.&rdquo; Then to
- Reed, who holds in his hands the racing list: &ldquo;Look for to-morrow&rsquo;s third
- race!&rdquo; Reed finds it.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What is the third horse?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Roysterer.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Roysterer!&rdquo; repeats James of the Beads. &ldquo;Good! There are nine letters in
- the name; three syllables; three r&rsquo;s!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then James of the Beads seizes with both hands, in a sort of ecstatic
- catch as catch can, on the gypsy chain of magic. He holds a bead between
- the thumb and fore-finger of each hand. Softly he counts the little yellow
- globes between.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thirty-three!&rdquo; ejaculates James of the Beads. Deeper lights begin to
- shine in his eye. One test of the chain, however, is not enough. He must
- make three. A second time he takes a bead between each fore-finger and
- thumb; on this trial the two beads are farther apart. Again he counts,
- feeling each golden bullet with his finger&rsquo;s tip as the tally proceeds.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Sixty-six!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- There arrives a glow on the brow of James of the Beads to keep company
- with the gathering sparkle of his eye. The questioning of the witch-chain
- goes on. Again he seizes the beads; again he tells the number.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Ninety-nine!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The prophecy is made; the story of success is foretold. James of the Beads
- is on fire; he springs to his feet. Rand and Reed regard him in silence,
- curiously. He walks to a window and sharply gazes out on the
- lamp-sprinkled evening.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Twenty-third street! Fifth avenue! Broadway!&rdquo; he mutters. &ldquo;Still three&mdash;always
- three!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Unconsciously James of the Beads seeks the window-shade with his hand. He
- would raise it a trifle; it is low and interrupts the eye as he stands
- gazing into the trio of thoroughfares. The tassel he grasps is old and
- comes off in his fingers. James of the Beads turns his glance on the
- tassel.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That, too, has its meaning,&rdquo; says James of the Beads, &ldquo;if only we might
- read it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The tassel is a common, poor creature of worsted yarns and strands wrapped
- about a clumsy mold of wood. James of the Beads scans it narrowly as it
- lies in his hand. At last he turns it, and the fringe falls away from the
- wooden mold. There is a little &ldquo;3&rdquo; burned upon the wood. James of the
- Beads exhibits this sacred sign to Reed and Rand; the while his excited
- interest deepens. Then he counts the strands of worsted which constitute
- the fringe. There are eighty-one!
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Three times three times three times three!&rdquo; and James of the Beads draws
- a deep breath.
- </p>
- <p>
- Who might resist these spectral manifestations of &ldquo;Three!&rdquo; James of the
- Beads turns from the window like one whose decision is made. Without a
- word he takes a slip of paper from his pocket book and going to the table
- writes his name on its back. It is a pleasant-seeming paper, this slip;
- and pleasantly engraved and written upon. No less is it than a New York
- draft drawn on the City National Bank by a leading Chicago concern for an
- even one hundred thousand dollars. James of the Beads places it in the
- hands of Rand.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To-morrow should be the luckiest of days,&rdquo; says James of the Beads. &ldquo;I
- must not lose it. I must consider to-morrow and arrange to set afoot
- certain projects which I&rsquo;ve had in train for some time. As to the races,
- Rand, take the draft and put it all on Roysterer.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Man alive!&rdquo; remonstrates the amazed Rand; &ldquo;it&rsquo;s too much on one horse!
- Moreover, I won&rsquo;t have time to get all that money down.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Get down what you can then,&rdquo; commands James of the Beads. &ldquo;Plunge! Have
- no fears! I tell you, so surely as the sun comes up, Roysterer will win.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The wise ones don&rsquo;t think so,&rdquo; urges Rand, who is not wedded to the
- mystic &ldquo;Three,&rdquo; and beholds nothing wondrous in that numeral. &ldquo;This
- Roysterer is a seven for one shot.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And the better for us,&rdquo; retorts James of the Beads. &ldquo;Roysterer is to
- win.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But wouldn&rsquo;t it be wiser to split this money and play part of it on
- Roysterer for a place?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Never!&rdquo; declares James of the Beads. &ldquo;Do you suppose I don&rsquo;t know what
- I&rsquo;m about? I&rsquo;m worth a million for each year of my life, and I made every
- stiver of it by the very method I take to discover this horse. Can&rsquo;t you
- see that I&rsquo;m not guessing?&mdash;that I have reason for what I do?
- Roysterer for a place! Never! get down every splinter that Roysterer
- finishes first.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Let me ask one question,&rdquo; observes the cautious Rand. &ldquo;Do you know the
- horse?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Never heard of the animal in my life!&rdquo; remarks James of the Beads,
- pouring himself a complacent glass. This he tastes approvingly. &ldquo;You must
- pardon me, my friends, I&rsquo;ve got to write a note or two. I&rsquo;ve not too much
- time for a man with twenty things to do, and who must be in the street
- when business opens to-morrow. Take my word for it; get all you can on
- Roysterer. If we win, we&rsquo;re partners; if we lose, I&rsquo;m alone.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Rand shakes sage, experienced head, while his face gathers a cynical look.
- </p>
- <p>
- Reed and Rand take James of the Beads by the hand and then withdraw.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What do you make of it?&rdquo; asks Rand.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The man&rsquo;s infatuated!&rdquo; replies Reed.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And yet, you also believe in systems,&rdquo; remarks Rand.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is the next afternoon. The Brighton course is rampant with the usual
- jostling, pushing, striving, guessing, knowing, wagering, winning, losing,
- ignorant, exulting, deploring, profane crowd. The conservative Rand has so
- far obeyed the behest of James of the Beads that he has fifteen thousand
- dollars on Roysterer straight.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To lose fifteen thousand won&rsquo;t hurt him,&rdquo; says Rand, and so consoles
- himself for a mad speculation whereof he has no joy.
- </p>
- <p>
- Reed and Rand, as taking life easily, are in a box; the race over which
- their interest clings and clambers is called.
- </p>
- <p>
- The horses are at the post. Roysterer does not act encouragingly; he is
- too sleepy&mdash;too lethargic! Starlight, the favorite, steps about,
- alert and springy as a cat; it should be an easy race for her if looks go
- for aught.
- </p>
- <p>
- They get the word; they are &ldquo;off!&rdquo; The field sweeps &rsquo;round the
- curve. A tall man in a nearby box follows the race with a glass.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;At the quarter,&rdquo; sings the tall man. &ldquo;Starlight first, Blenheim second,
- Roysterer third!&rdquo; There is a pause. Then the tall man: &ldquo;At the half!
- Starlight first, Blenheim second, Roysterer third!&rdquo; Rand turns to Reed.
- &ldquo;He must better that,&rdquo; says Rand, &ldquo;or he&rsquo;ll explode the superstition of
- our friend.&rdquo; There is a wait of twenty-five seconds. Again the tall,
- binoculared man: &ldquo;Three-quarter post! Starlight first, Blenheim second,
- Roysterer third&mdash;and whipping!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s as good as over,&rdquo; observes Rand. &ldquo;I wonder what James of the Beads
- will say to his witch-chain when he hears the finish.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s surprising,&rdquo; remarks Reed peevishly, &ldquo;that a man of his force and
- clear intelligence should own to such a weakness! All his life he&rsquo;s
- followed this marvelous &lsquo;Three&rsquo; about; and having had vast success he
- attributes it to the &lsquo;Three,&rsquo; when he might as well and as wisely ascribe
- it to Captain Kidd or Trinity church. To-day&rsquo;s results may cure him; and
- that&rsquo;s one comfort.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- There is a sharp click as the tall man in the nearby box shuts up his
- glasses.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Roysterer wins!&rdquo; says the tall man.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Got down fifteen thousand. Won one hundred and five thousand,&rdquo; reads
- James of the Beads from Rand&rsquo;s telegram sent from the track. James of the
- Beads is in his offices; he has just finished a victorious day, at once
- heavy and tumultuous with the buying and the selling of full three hundred
- thousand shares of stocks. &ldquo;They should have wagered the full one hundred
- thousand and let the odds look after themselves,&rdquo; he says. Then James of
- the Beads begins to caress the gypsy chain. &ldquo;You knew,&rdquo; he murmurs; &ldquo;of
- course, you knew!&rdquo; There is a note of devotion in the tones. The
- bead-worship goes on for a silent moment. &ldquo;Only one hundred and five
- thousand!&rdquo; ruminates James of the Beads. &ldquo;I suppose Rand was afraid!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That is indeed a curious story,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor, when the Red
- Nosed Gentleman, being done with James of the Beads, was returning to his
- burgundy; &ldquo;and did it really happen?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Of a verity, did it,&rdquo; returned the Red Nosed Gentleman. &ldquo;I was Rand.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Conversation fluttered from one topic to another for a brief space, but
- dealt mainly with those divers superstitions that folk affect. When signs
- and omens were worn out, the Jolly Doctor turned upon the Old Cattleman as
- though to remind that ancient practitioner of cows how it would be now his
- right to uplift us with a reminiscence.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;No, I don&rsquo;t need to be told it none,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;On the
- principle of freeze-out, it&rsquo;s shore got down to me. Seein&rsquo; how this yere
- snow reminds me a heap of Christmas, I&rsquo;ll onload on you-all how we&rsquo;re
- aroused an&rsquo; brought to a realisin&rsquo; sense of that season of gifts once upon
- a time in Wolfville.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0006" id="link2HCH0006"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER VI.&mdash;THAT WOLFVILLE CHRISTMAS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>his yere can&rsquo;t be
- called a story; which it can&rsquo;t even be described none as a sketch.
- Accordin&rsquo; to the critics, who, bein&rsquo; plumb onable to write one themse&rsquo;fs,
- nacherally knows what a story ought to be, no story&rsquo;s a story onless she&rsquo;s
- built up like one of these one-sided hills. Reelation must climb painfully
- from base to peak, on the slope side, with interest on a up-grade, say, of
- one foot in ten; an&rsquo; then when you-all arrives safely at the summit, the
- same bein&rsquo; the climax, you&rsquo;re to pitch headlong over the precipice on the
- sheer an&rsquo; other side, an&rsquo; in the space of not more&rsquo;n a brace of sentences,
- land, bing! bang! smash!&mdash;all broke up at the bottom. That, by what
- you-all might call &ldquo;Our best literary lights,&rdquo; would be a story, an&rsquo; since
- what I&rsquo;m about to onfold don&rsquo;t own no sech brands nor y&rsquo;ear-marks, it
- can&rsquo;t come onder that head.
- </p>
- <p>
- This partic&rsquo;lar o&rsquo;casion is when little Enright Peets Tutt&mdash;said
- blessed infant, as I sets forth former, bein&rsquo; the conj&rsquo;int production of
- Dave Tutt an&rsquo; his esteemable wife, Tucson Jennie&mdash;is comin&rsquo; eight
- years old next spring round-up. Little Enright Peets is growin&rsquo; strong an&rsquo;
- husky now, an&rsquo; is the pride of the Wolfville heart. He&rsquo;s shed his milk
- teeth an&rsquo; is sproutin&rsquo; a second mouthful, white an&rsquo; clean as a coyote&rsquo;s.
- Also, his cur&rsquo;osity is deeveloped powerful an&rsquo; he&rsquo;s in the habit of
- pervadin&rsquo; about from the Red Light to the New York Store, askin&rsquo;
- questions; an&rsquo; he is as familiar in the local landscape as either the
- Tucson stage or Old Monte, the drunkard who drives it.
- </p>
- <p>
- One afternoon, about first drink time, little Enright Peets comes waddlin&rsquo;
- up to Old Man Enright on them short reedic&rsquo;lous black-b&rsquo;ar laigs of his,
- an&rsquo; says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Say, gran&rsquo;dad Enright, don&rsquo;t you-all cim-marons never have no Christmas
- in this camp? Which if you does, all I got to say is I don&rsquo;t notice no
- Christmas none since I&rsquo;ve been yere, an&rsquo; that&rsquo;s whatever!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0007" id="linkimage-0007"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0091.jpg" alt="0091 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0091.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Will you-all listen to this preecocious child!&rdquo; observes Enright to Doc
- Peets, with whom he&rsquo;s in talk. &ldquo;Wherever now do you reckon, Doc, he hears
- tell of Christmas?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How about it, Uncle Doc?&rdquo; asks little Enright Peets, turnin&rsquo; his eyes up
- to Peets when he notices Enright don&rsquo;t reply.
- </p>
- <p>
- At this Enright an&rsquo; Peets makes a disparin&rsquo; gesture an&rsquo; wheels into the
- Red Light for a drink, leavin&rsquo; pore little Enright Peets standin&rsquo; in the
- street.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That baby puts us to shame, Doc,&rdquo; says Enright, as he signs up to Black
- Jack, the barkeep, for the Valley Tan; &ldquo;he shows us in one word how we
- neglects his eddication. The idee of that child never havin&rsquo; had no
- Christmas! It&rsquo;s more of a stain on this commoonity than not hangin&rsquo; Navajo
- Joe that time.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s whatever!&rdquo; assents Peets, reachin&rsquo; for the nose-paint in his turn.
- &ldquo;&lsquo;Out of the mouths of babes an&rsquo; sucklin&rsquo;s,&rsquo; as the good book says.&rdquo; This
- infantile bluff of little Enright Peets goes a long way to stir up the
- sensibilities of the public. As for Enright, he don&rsquo;t scroople to take
- Dave Tutt to task.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The thought that you, Dave,&rdquo; says Enright, &ldquo;you, a gent I yeretofore
- regyards as distinguished for every paternal virchoo, would go romancin&rsquo;
- along, lettin&rsquo; that boy grow up in darkness of Christmas, an&rsquo; it one of
- the first festivals of the Christian world! As a play, I says freely, that
- sech neglect is plumb too many for me!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;She&rsquo;s shore a shame,&rdquo; adds Dan Boggs, who&rsquo;s also shocked a heap, and
- stands in with Enright to crawl Dave&rsquo;s hump, &ldquo;she&rsquo;s shore a shame, never
- to provide no Christmas for that offspring of yours, an&rsquo; leave him to go
- knockin&rsquo; about in his ignorance like a blind dog in a meat shop. That&rsquo;s
- what I states; she&rsquo;s a shame!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now gents,&rdquo; reemonstrates Dave, &ldquo;don&rsquo;t press the limit in these yere
- reecrim&rsquo;nations, don&rsquo;t crowd me too hard. I asks you, whatever could I do?
- If you-all enthoosiasts will look this yere Christmas proposition ca&rsquo;mly
- in the face, you&rsquo;ll begin to notice that sech cel&rsquo;brations ain&rsquo;t feasible
- in Arizona. Christmas in its very beginnin&rsquo; is based on snow. Who&rsquo;s the
- reg&rsquo;lar round-up boss for Christmas? Ain&rsquo;t he a disrepootable Dutchman
- named Santa Claus? Don&rsquo;t he show up wrapped in furs, an&rsquo; with reindeer an&rsquo;
- sleigh an&rsquo; hock deep in a snowstorm? Answer me that? Also show me where&rsquo;s
- your snow an&rsquo; where&rsquo;s your sleigh an&rsquo; where&rsquo;s your reindeer an&rsquo; where&rsquo;s
- your Dutchman in Wolfville? You-all better go about Jixin&rsquo; up your camp
- an&rsquo; your climate so as to make one of these Christmases possible before
- ever you come buttin&rsquo; in, cavilin&rsquo; an&rsquo; criticisin&rsquo; ag&rsquo;in me as a parent.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which jest the same, Dave,&rdquo; contends Dan, who takes the eepisode mighty
- sour, &ldquo;it looks like you-all could have made some sort o&rsquo; play.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- About this time, as addin&rsquo; itse&rsquo;f to the gen&rsquo;ral jolt given the Wolfville
- nerve by them Christmas questions put aforesaid by little Enright Peets,
- news comes floatin&rsquo; over from Red Dog of a awful spree that low-flung
- outfit enjoys. It&rsquo;s a Six Shooter Weddin&rsquo;; so deenominated because Pete
- Bland, the outlaw for whom the party is made, an&rsquo; his wife, The Duchess,
- has been married six years an&rsquo; ain&rsquo;t done nothin&rsquo; but fight. Wherefore, on
- the sixth anniversary of their nuptials, Red Dog resolves on a Six Shooter
- Weddin&rsquo;; an&rsquo; tharupon descends on those two wedded warriors, Pete an&rsquo; The
- Duchess, in a body, packin&rsquo; fiddles, nose-paint, an&rsquo; the complete regalia
- of a frantic shindig. An&rsquo; you hear me, gents, them Red Dog tarrapins shore
- throws themse&rsquo;fs loose! You-all could hear their happy howls in Wolfville.
- </p>
- <p>
- As a reason for the outburst, an&rsquo; one consistent with its name, the guests
- endows Pete an&rsquo; The Duchess each with belts an&rsquo; a brace of guns.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To the end,&rdquo; says the Red Dog cha&rsquo;rman when he makes the presentation
- speech, &ldquo;that, as between Pete an&rsquo; The Duchess, we as a commoonity
- promotes a even break, and clothes both parties in interest with equal
- powers to preserve the peace.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As I observes, it&rsquo;s the story of these proud doin&rsquo;s on the locoed part of
- our rival, that ondoubted goes some distance to decide us Wolves of
- Wolfville on pullin&rsquo; off a Christmas warjig for little Enright Peets. We
- ain&rsquo;t goin&rsquo; to be outdone none in this business of being fervid.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s mebby a month prior to Christmas when we resolves on this yere
- racket, an&rsquo; so we has ample time to prepare. Almost every afternoon an&rsquo;
- evenin&rsquo; over our Valley Tan, we discusses an&rsquo; does our wisest to evolve a
- programme. It&rsquo;s then we begins to grasp the wisdom of Dave&rsquo;s observations
- touchin&rsquo; how onfeasible it is to go talkin&rsquo; of Christmas in southern
- Arizona.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Nacherally,&rdquo; remarks Enright, as we sits about the Red Light, turnin&rsquo; the
- game in our minds, &ldquo;nacherally, we ups an&rsquo; gives little Enright Peets
- presents. Which brings us within ropin&rsquo; distance of the inquiry, &lsquo;Whatever
- will we give him?&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;We-all can&rsquo;t give him fish-lines, an&rsquo; sech,&rdquo; says Doc Peets, takin&rsquo; up
- Enright&rsquo;s argument, &ldquo;for thar ain&rsquo;t no fish. Skates is likewise barred,
- thar bein&rsquo; no ice; an&rsquo; sleds an&rsquo; mittens an&rsquo; worsted comforters an&rsquo; fur
- caps fails us for causes sim&rsquo;lar. Little Enright Peets is too young to
- smoke; Tucson Jennie won&rsquo;t let him drink licker; thar, with one word, is
- them two important sources closed ag&rsquo;in us. Gents, Pm inclined to string
- my bets with Dave; I offers two for one as we sets yere, that this framin&rsquo;
- up a Christmas play in Arizona as a problem ain&rsquo;t no slouch.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thar&rsquo;s picture books,&rdquo; says Faro Nell.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Shore!&rdquo; assents Cherokee Hall, where he&rsquo;s planted back of his faro box.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; painted blocks!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Good!&rdquo; says Cherokee.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; candy!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Nell&rsquo;s right!&rdquo; an&rsquo; Cherokee coincides plumb through, &ldquo;Books, blocks, an&rsquo;
- candy, is what I calls startin&rsquo; on velvet.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Whatever&rsquo;s the matter,&rdquo; says Dan Boggs, who&rsquo;s been rackin&rsquo; his intellects
- a heap, &ldquo;of givin&rsquo; little Enright Peets a faro layout, or mebby now, a
- roolette wheel? Some of them wheels is mighty gaudy furniture!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Dan,&rdquo; says Enright, an&rsquo; his tones is severe; &ldquo;Dan, be you-all aimin&rsquo; to
- corrupt this child?&rdquo; Dan subsides a whole lot after this yere reproof.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t reckon now,&rdquo; observes Jack Moore, an&rsquo; his manner is as one ropin&rsquo;
- for information; &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t reckon now a nice, wholesome Colt&rsquo;s-44, ivory
- butt, stamped leather belts, an&rsquo; all that, would be a proper thing to put
- in play. Of course, a 8-inch gun is some heavy as a plaything for a infant
- only seven; but he&rsquo;d grow to it, gents, he&rsquo;d grow to it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Don&rsquo;t alloode to sech a thing, Jack,&rdquo; says Dan, with a shudder; &ldquo;don&rsquo;t
- alloode to it. Little Enright Peets would up an&rsquo; blow his yoothful light
- out; an&rsquo; then Tucson Jennie would camp on our trails forevermore as the
- deestroyers of her child. The mere idee gives me the fantods!&rdquo; An&rsquo; Dan,
- who&rsquo;s a nervous party, shudders ag&rsquo;in.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Gents,&rdquo; says Texas Thompson, &ldquo;I ain&rsquo;t cut in on this talk for two
- reasons: one is I ain&rsquo;t had nothin&rsquo; to say; an&rsquo; ag&rsquo;in, it was Christmas
- Day when my Laredo wife&mdash;who I once or twice adverts to as gettin&rsquo; a
- divorce&mdash;ups an&rsquo; quits me for good. For which causes it has been my
- habit to pass up all mention an&rsquo; mem&rsquo;ry of this sacred season in a sperit
- of silent pra&rsquo;r. But time has so far modified my feelin&rsquo;s that,
- considerin&rsquo; the present purposes of the camp, I&rsquo;m willin&rsquo; to be heard.
- Thar&rsquo;s nothin&rsquo; that should be looked to more jealously than this ye re
- givin&rsquo; of presents. It&rsquo;s grown so that as a roole the business of makin&rsquo;
- presents degen&rsquo;rates to this: Some sport who can&rsquo;t afford to, gives some
- sport something he don&rsquo;t need. Thar&rsquo;s no fear of the first, since we gents
- can afford anything we likes. As to the second prop&rsquo;sition, we should skin
- our kyards some sharp. We-all ought to lavish on little Enright Peets a
- present which, while safegyardin&rsquo; his life an&rsquo; his morals, is calc&rsquo;lated
- to teach him some useful accomplishments. Books, blocks, an sweetmeats, as
- proposed by our fac&rsquo;natin&rsquo; townswoman, Miss Faro Nell&rdquo;&mdash;Nell tosses
- Texas a kiss&mdash;&ldquo;is in admir&rsquo;ble p&rsquo;int as coverin&rsquo; a question of
- amooze-ments. For the rest, an&rsquo; as makin&rsquo; for the deevel-opment of what
- will be best in the character of little Enright Peets, I moves you we-all
- turns in an&rsquo; buys that baby the best bronco&mdash;saddle, bridle, rope an&rsquo;
- spurs, complete&mdash;that the southwest affords.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Texas, who&rsquo;s done stood up to make this yere oration, camps down ag&rsquo;in in
- the midst of a storm of applause. The su&rsquo;gestion has immediate adoption.
- </p>
- <p>
- We-all gives a cold thousand for the little boss. We gets him of the sharp
- who&mdash;it bein&rsquo; in the old day before railroads&mdash;is slammin&rsquo;
- through the mails from Chihuahua to El Paso, three hundred miles in three
- nights. This bronco&mdash;he&rsquo;s a deep bay, shadin&rsquo; off into black like one
- of them overripe violins, an&rsquo; with nostrils like red expandin&rsquo; hollyhocks&mdash;can
- go a hundred miles between dark an&rsquo; dark, an&rsquo; do it three days in a week.
- Which lie&rsquo;s shore a wonder, is that little hoss; an&rsquo; the saddle an&rsquo;
- upholstery that goes with him, Spanish leather an&rsquo; gold, is fit for his
- company.
- </p>
- <p>
- As Dan leads him up in front of the Red Light Christmas Eve for us to look
- at, he says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Gents, if he ain&rsquo;t a swallow-bird on four legs, then I never sees no sech
- fowl; an&rsquo; the only drawback is that, considerin&rsquo; the season, we can&rsquo;t hang
- him on no tree.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; y ere, now, is where we-all gets scared up. It spoils the symmetry of
- this story to chunk it in this a-way; but I can&rsquo;t he&rsquo;p myse&rsquo;f, for this
- story, like that tale of James of the Beads, is troo.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jest as we-all is about to prounce down with our gifts on Dave&rsquo;s wickeyup
- like a mink on a settin&rsquo; hen&mdash;Dan bein&rsquo; all framed an&rsquo; frazzled up in
- cow-tails an&rsquo; buffalo horns like a Injun medicine man, thinkin&rsquo; to make
- the deal as Santa Claus&mdash;Tucson Jennie comes surgin&rsquo; up, wild an&rsquo;
- frantic, an&rsquo; allows little Enright Peets is lost. Dave, she says, is
- chargin&rsquo; about, tryin&rsquo; to round him up.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which I knows he&rsquo;s done been chewed up by wolves,&rdquo; says Tucson Jennie,
- wringin&rsquo; her hands an&rsquo; throwin&rsquo; her apron over her head. &ldquo;He&rsquo;d shore
- showed up for supper if he&rsquo;s alive.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s obvious that before that Christmas can proceed, we-all has got to
- recover the beneficiary. Thar&rsquo;s a gen&rsquo;ral saddlin&rsquo; up, an&rsquo; in no time
- Wolf-ville&rsquo;s population is spraddlin&rsquo; about the surroundin&rsquo; scenery.
- </p>
- <p>
- It comes right though, an&rsquo; it&rsquo;s Dan who makes the turn. Dan discovers
- little Enright Peets camped down in the lee of a mesquite bush, seven
- miles out on his way to the Floridas mountains. He puts it up he&rsquo;s goin&rsquo;
- over to the hills to have a big talk an&rsquo; make medicine with Moh-Kwa, the
- wise medicine b&rsquo;ar that Sioux Sam yere has been reelatin&rsquo; to him about.
- </p>
- <p>
- No, that child ain&rsquo;t scared none; he&rsquo;s takin&rsquo; it cool an&rsquo; contented, with
- twenty coyotes settin&rsquo; about, blinkin&rsquo; an&rsquo; silent on their tails, an&rsquo;
- lookin&rsquo; like they&rsquo;re sort o&rsquo; thinkin&rsquo; little Enright Peets over an&rsquo; tryin&rsquo;
- to figger out his system. Them little wolves don&rsquo;t onderstand what brings
- that infant out alone on the plains, that a-way; an&rsquo; they&rsquo;re cogitatin&rsquo;
- about it when Dan disperses &rsquo;em to the four winds.
- </p>
- <p>
- That&rsquo;s all thar is to the yarn. Little Enright Peets is packed into camp
- an&rsquo; planted in the midst of them books an&rsquo; blocks an&rsquo; candies which Faro
- Nell su&rsquo;gests; also, he&rsquo;s made happy with the little hoss. Dan, in his
- medicine mask an&rsquo; paint, does a skelp dance, an&rsquo; is the soul of the hour.
- </p>
- <p>
- Little Enright Peets&rsquo; joy is as wide as the territory. Despite
- reemonstrance, he insists on get-tin&rsquo; into that gold-embossed saddle an&rsquo;
- givin&rsquo; his little hoss a whirl &lsquo;round the camp. Dan rides along to head
- off stampedes.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the return, little Enright Peets comes down the street like an arrow
- an&rsquo; pulls up short. As Dave searches him out of the saddle, he says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Paw, that cayouse could beat four kings an&rsquo; a ace.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That&rsquo;s reward enough; Wolfville is never more pleased than the night it
- opens up to little Enright Peets the beauties which lies hid in Christmas.
- An&rsquo; the feelin&rsquo; that we-all has done this, sort o&rsquo; glorifies an&rsquo; gilds the
- profound deebauch that en-soos. Tucson Jennie lays it down that it&rsquo;s shore
- the star Christmas, since it&rsquo;s the one when her lost is found an&rsquo; the
- Fates in the guise of Dan presents her with her boy ag&rsquo;in. I knows of
- myse&rsquo;f, gents, that Jennie is shore moved, for she omits utter to lay for
- Dave with reproaches when, givin&rsquo; way to a gen&rsquo;rous impulse, he issues
- forth with the rest of the band, an&rsquo; relaxes into a picnic that savors of
- old days.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;My friends,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor, as we were taking our candles
- preparatory for bed, the hour having turned towards the late, &ldquo;I shall
- think on this as an occasion of good company. And to-morrow evening&mdash;for
- this storm will continue to hold us prisoners&mdash;you will find unless
- better offer, I shall recognize my debt to you by attempting a Christmas
- story myself. I cannot stir your interest as has our friend of camps and
- trails with his Wolfville chapter, but I shall do what lies in me.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You will tell us of some Christmas,&rdquo; hazarded the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;that
- came beneath your notice as a professional man.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Oh, no; not that,&rdquo; returned the Jolly Doctor. &ldquo;This is rather a story of
- health and robust strength than any sick-bed tale. It is of gloves and
- fighting men who never saw a doctor. I shall call it &lsquo;The Pitt Street
- Stringency.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was eight of the clock on the second evening when we gathered about the
- fire-place. The snow was still falling and roads were reported blocked
- beyond any thought of passage. We were snowbound; folk who should know
- declared that if a road were broken for our getting out within a week, it
- was the best we might look for.
- </p>
- <p>
- No one seemed stricken of grief at this prison prospect. As we came about
- the cheery blaze, every face was easy and content. The Jolly Doctor joined
- the Red Nosed Gentleman in his burgundy, while the Sour Gentleman and the
- Old Cattleman qualified for the occasion with a copious account of
- whiskey, which the aged man of cows called &ldquo;Nose-paint.&rdquo; Sioux Sam and I
- were the only &ldquo;abstainers&rdquo;&mdash;I had ceased and he had never commenced&mdash;but
- as if to make up, we smoked a double number of cigars.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Jolly Doctor began with the explanation that the incidents he would
- relate had fallen beneath his notice when as a student he walked the New
- York hospitals; then, glass in hand, he told us the tale of The Pitt
- Street Stringency.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0007" id="link2HCH0007"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER VII.&mdash;THE PITT STREET STRINGENCY.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span>nother would-be
- sooicide, eh! Here, Kid,&rdquo; to a sharp gamin who does errands and odd
- commissions for the house; &ldquo;take this mut in where dey kills &rsquo;em.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The speaker is a loud young man, clad in garments of violence. The derby
- tilted over eye, the black cigar jutting ceilingward at an agle of sixty
- degrees, the figured shirt whereof a dominating dye is angry red, the high
- collar and flash tie, with its cheap stone, all declare the Bowery. As if
- to prove the proposition announced of his costume, the young man is
- perched on a stool, the official ticket-seller of a Bowery theatre.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike Menares, whom the Bowery person alludes to as the &ldquo;mut,&rdquo; is a
- square-shouldered boy of eighteen; handsome he is as Apollo, yet with a
- slow, good-humored guilelessness of face. He has come on business bent.
- That mighty pugilist, the Dublin Terror, is nightly on the stage, offering
- two hundred dollars to any amateur among boxers who shall remain before
- him four Queensberry rounds. Mike Menares, he of the candidly innocent
- countenance, desires to proffer himself as a sacrifice.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Youse is just in time, sport,&rdquo; remarks the brisk gamin to whom Mike has
- been committed, as he pilots the guileless one to the stage door. &ldquo;It&rsquo;s
- nine o&rsquo;clock now, an&rsquo; d&rsquo; Terror goes on to do his bag-t&rsquo;umpin&rsquo; turn at
- ten. After that comes d&rsquo; knockin&rsquo; out, see! But say! if youse was tired of
- livin&rsquo;, why didn&rsquo;t you jump in d&rsquo; East river? I&rsquo;d try d&rsquo; river an&rsquo;d&rsquo;
- morgue before I&rsquo;d come here to be murdered be d&rsquo; Terror.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike makes no retort to this, lacking lightness of temper. His gamin
- conductor throws open the stage door and signals Mike to enter.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Tell d&rsquo; butcher here&rsquo;s another calf for him,&rdquo; vouchsafes the gamin to the
- stage-hands inside the door.
- </p>
- <p>
- Let us go back four hours to a three-room tenement in Pitt Street. There
- are two rooms and a little kennel of a kitchen. The furnishings are rough
- and cheap and clean. The lady of the tenement, as the floors declare, is a
- miracle of soap and water. And the lady is little Mollie Lacy, aged eleven
- years.
- </p>
- <p>
- The family of the Pitt Street tenement is made up of three. There is Mike
- Menares, our hero; little Mollie; and, lastly, her brother Davy, aged
- nine. Little Davy is lame. He fell on the tenement stairs four years
- before and injured his hip. The hospital doctors took up the work where
- the tenement stairs left off, and Davy came from his sick-bed doomed to a
- crutch for life.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike Menares is half-brother of the younger ones. Nineteen years before,
- Mike&rsquo;s mother, Irish, with straw-colored hair and blue eyes, wedded one
- Menares, a Spanish Jew. This fortunate Menares was a well-looking, tall
- man; with hair black and stiffening in a natural pompadour. He kept a
- tobacco stall underneath a stair in Park Row, and was accounted rich by
- the awfully poor about him. He died, however, within the year following
- Mike&rsquo;s birth; and thus there was an end to the rather thoroughbred dark
- Spanish Jew.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike&rsquo;s mother essayed matrimony a second time. She selected as a partner
- in this experiment a shiftless, idle, easy creature named David Lacy, who
- would have been a plasterer had not his indolence defeated his craft.
- Little Mollie, and Davy of the clattering crutch, occurred as a kind of
- penalty of the nuptials.
- </p>
- <p>
- Three years and a half before we encounter this mixed household, Lacy, the
- worthless, sailed away on a China ship without notice or farewell. Some
- say he was &ldquo;shanghaied,&rdquo; and some that he went of free will. Mrs. Lacy
- adopted the former of the two theories.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;David Lacy, too idle to work ashore, assuredly would not go to sea where
- work and fare are tenfold harder.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus argued Mrs. Lacy. Still, a solution of Lacy&rsquo;s reasons for becoming a
- mariner late in life is not here important. He sailed and he never
- returned; and as Mrs. Lacy perished of pneumonia the following winter,
- they both may be permitted to quit this chronicle to be meddled with by us
- no further.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike Menares had witnessed fifteen years when his mother died. As
- suggested, he is a singularly handsome boy, and of an appearance likely to
- impress. From his Conemara mother, he received a yellow head of hair.
- Underneath are a pair of jet black brows, a hawkish nose, double rows of
- strong white teeth, and deep soft black eyes, as honest as a hound&rsquo;s, the
- plain bestowal of his Jewish father.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike was driving a delivery wagon for the great grocers, Mark &amp;
- Milford, when his mother died. This brought six dollars a week. After the
- sad going of his mother, Mike found a second situation where he might work
- evenings, and thereby add six further dollars to that stipend from Mark
- &amp; Milford. This until the other day continued. On twelve dollars a
- week, and with little Mollie&mdash;a notable housekeeper&mdash;to manage
- for the Pitt Street tenement, the composite house of Menares and Lacy
- fared well.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike&rsquo;s evening labors require a description. One Sarsfield O&rsquo;Punch, an
- expert of boxing and an athlete of some eminence, maintains a private
- gymnasium on Fifty-ninth street. This personage is known to his patrons as
- &ldquo;Professor O&rsquo;Punch.&rdquo; Mike, well-builded and lithe, broad of shoulder, deep
- of lung, lean of flank, a sort of half-grown Hercules, finds congenial
- employ as aid to Professor O&rsquo;Punch. Mike&rsquo;s primal duty is to box with
- those amateurs of the game who seek fistic enlightenment of his patron,
- and who have been carried by that scientist into regions of half-wisdom
- concerning the bruising art for which they moil. From eight o&rsquo;clock until
- eleven, Mike&rsquo;s destiny sets him, one after the other, before a full score
- of these would-be boxers, some small and some big, some good and some bad,
- some weak and some strong, but all zealous to a perspiring degree. These
- novices smite and spare not, and move with all their skill and strength to
- pummel Mike. They have, be it said, but indifferent success; for Mike,
- waxing expert among experts, side-steps and blocks and stops and ducks and
- gets away; and his performances in these defensive directions are the
- whisper of the school.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now and then he softly puts a glove on some eager face, or over some
- unguarded heart, or feather-like left-hooks some careless jaw, to the end
- that the other understand a peril and fend against it. But Mike, working
- lightly as a kitten, hurts no one; such being the private commands of
- Professor O&rsquo;Punch who knows that to pound a pupil is to lose a pupil.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is to be doubted if the easy-natured Mike is aware of his wonderful
- strength of arm and body, or the cat-like quickness and certainty of his
- blows. During these three years wherein he has been underling to Professor
- O&rsquo;Punch, Mike strikes but two hard blows. One evening several of the
- followers of Professor O&rsquo;Punch are determining their prowess on a machine
- intended to register the force of a blow. Following each other in a
- fashion of punching procession, these aspiring gymnasts, putting their
- utmost into the swings, strike with all steam. Four hundred to five
- hundred pounds says the register; this is vaunted as a vastly good
- account.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike, with folded arms and stripped to ring costume&mdash;his official
- robes&mdash;is looking on, a smile lighting his pleasant face. Mike is
- ever interested and ever silent.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the others smite, Mike beams with approval, but makes no comment. At
- last one observes:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Menares, how many pounds can you strike?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t know,&rdquo; replies Mike, in a surprised way, &ldquo;I never tried.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Try now,&rdquo; says the other; &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve a notion you could hit hard enough if you
- cared to.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The others second the speaker. Much and instant curiosity grows up as to
- what Mike can do with his hands if he puts his soul into it. There is not
- an amateur about but knows more of Mike than does the latter of himself.
- They know him as one perfect of defensive boxing; also, they recall the
- precise feather-like taps which Mike confers on the best of their muster
- whenever he chooses; but none has a least of knowledge of how bitterly
- hard Mike&rsquo;s glove might be sent home should ever his heart be given to the
- trial.
- </p>
- <p>
- Being urged, Mike begins to rouse; he himself grows curious. It has never
- come to him as a thought to make the experiment. The &ldquo;punching machine&rdquo;
- has stood there as part of the paraphernalia of the gymnasium. But to the
- fog-witted Mike, who comes to work for so many dollars a week and who has
- not once considered himself in the light of a boxer, whether excellent or
- the reverse, it held no particular attraction. It could tell him no
- secrets he cares a stiver to hear.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now, Mike for a first time feels moved to a bit of self-enlightenment.
- Poising himself for the effort, Mike, with the quickness of light, sends
- in a right-hand smash that all but topples the contrivance from its base.
- For the moment the muscles of his back and leg knot and leap in ropelike
- ridges; and then they as instantly sink away. The machine registers eight
- hundred and ninety-one pounds.
- </p>
- <p>
- The on-gazers draw a long breath. Then they turn their eyes on Mike, whose
- regular outlines, with muscles retreated again into curves and slopes and
- shimmering ripples, have no taint of the bruiser, and whose handsome
- features, innocent of a faintest ferocity, recall some beautiful statue
- rather than anything more viciously hard.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike&rsquo;s second earnest blow comes off in this sort. He is homeward bound
- from gymnasium work one frosty midnight. Not a block from his home, three
- evil folk of the night are standing beneath an electric light. Mike,
- unsuspicious, passes them. Instantly, one delivers a cut at Mike&rsquo;s head
- with a sandbag. Mike, warned by the shadow of uplifted arm, springs
- forward out of reach, wheels, and then as the footpad blunders towards
- him, Mike&rsquo;s left hand, clenched and hammerlike, goes straight to his face.
- Bone and teeth are broken with the shock of it; blood spurts, and the
- footpad comes senseless to the pave. His ally, one of the other two,
- grasps at Mike&rsquo;s throat. His clutch slips on the stern muscles of the
- athlete&rsquo;s neck as if the neck were a column of brass. Mike seizes his
- assailant&rsquo;s arm with his right hand; there is a twist and a shriek; the
- second robber rolls about with a dislocated fore-arm. The third, unharmed,
- flies screeching with the fear of death upon him.
- </p>
- <p>
- At full speed comes a policeman, warned of his duty by the howls of
- anguish. He surveys the two on the ground; one still and quiet, the other
- groaning and cursing with his twisted arm. The officer sends in an
- ambulance call. Then he surveys with pleased intentness the regular face
- of Mike, cool and unperturbed.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An Irish Sheeny!&rdquo; softly comments the officer to himself.
- </p>
- <p>
- He is expert of faces, is the officer, and deduces Mike&rsquo;s two-ply origin
- from his yellow hair, dark eye and curved nose.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You&rsquo;re part Irish and part Jew,&rdquo; observes the policeman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;My mother was from Ireland,&rdquo; answers Mike; &ldquo;my father was a Spanish Jew
- from Salamanca. I think that&rsquo;s what they call it, although I was not old
- enough when he died to remember much about him.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Irish crossed on Jew!&rdquo; comments the officer, still in a mood of
- thoughtful admiration. &ldquo;It&rsquo;s the best prize-ring strain in the world!&rdquo; The
- officer is in his dim way a patron of sport.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike thanks the other; for, while by no means clearly understanding, he
- feels that a compliment is meant. Then Mike goes homeward to Mollie and
- little Davy.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is the twenty-third of December&mdash;two days before Christmas&mdash;when
- we are first made friends of Mike Menares. About a month before, the
- little family of three fell upon bad days. Mike was dismissed by the great
- grocers, and the six dollars weekly from that quarter came to an end.
- Mike&rsquo;s delivery wagon was run down and crushed by a car; and, while Mike
- was not to blame, the grocers have no time to discover a justice, and Mike
- was told to go.
- </p>
- <p>
- For mere food and light and fire, Mike&rsquo;s other six Saturday dollars from
- Professor O&rsquo;Punch would with economy provide. But there is the rent on New
- Year&rsquo;s day! Also, and more near, is Christmas, with not a penny to spare.
- It must perforce be a bare festival, this Christmas. It will be a blow to
- little Davy of the crutch, who has talked only of Christmas for two months
- past and gone.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike, as has been intimated, is dull and slow of brain. He has just enough
- of education to be able to read and write. He owns no bad habits&mdash;no
- habits at all, in fact; and the one great passion of his simple heart is
- love without a limit for Mollie and little Davy. He lives for them; the
- least of their desires is the great concern of Mike&rsquo;s life. Therefore,
- when his income shrinks from twelve dollars to six, it creeps up on him
- and chills him as a loss to Mollie and Davy. And peculiarly does this
- sorrowful business of a ruined Christmas for Davy prey on poor Mike.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You and I won&rsquo;t mind,&rdquo; says housewife Mollie, looking up in Mike&rsquo;s face
- with the sage dignity of her eleven years, &ldquo;because we&rsquo;re old enough to
- understand; but I feel bad about little Davy. It&rsquo;s the first real awful
- Christmas we&rsquo;ve ever had.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Mollie is as bright and wise as Mike is dull. Seven years her senior,
- still Mike has grown to believe in and rely altogether on Mollie as a
- guide. He takes her commands without question, and does her will like a
- slave. To Mollie goes every one of Mike&rsquo;s dollars; it is Mollie who
- disposes of them, while Mike never gives them a thought. They have been
- devoted to the one purpose of Mike&rsquo;s labors; they have gone to Mollie and
- little Davy of the crutch; why, then, should Mike pursue them further?
- </p>
- <p>
- Following housewife Mollie&rsquo;s regrets over a sad Christmas that was not
- because of their poverty to be a Christmas, Mike sits solemnly by the
- window looking out on the gathering gloom and hurrying holiday crowds of
- Pitt Street. The folk are all poor; yet each seems able to do a bit for
- Christmas. As they hurry by, with small bundles and parcels, and now and
- then a basket from which protrude mayhap a turkey&rsquo;s legs or other symptom
- of the victory of Christmas, Mike, in the midst of his sluggish
- amiabilities, discovers a sense of pain&mdash;a darkish thought of
- trouble.
- </p>
- <p>
- And as if grief were to sharpen his wits, Mike has for almost a first and
- last time an original idea. It is the thought natural enough, when one
- reflects on Mike&rsquo;s engagements, evening in and evening out, with Professor
- O&rsquo;Punch.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0008" id="linkimage-0008"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0115.jpg" alt="0115 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0115.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- That day Mike, in passing through the Bowery, read the two hundred dollars
- offer of the selfconfident Terror. At that time Mike felt nothing save
- wonder that so great a fortune might be the reward of so small an effort.
- But it did not occur to him that he should try a tilt with the Terror. In
- his present stress, however, and with the woe upon him of a bad Christmas
- to dawn for little Davy, the notion marches slowly into Mike&rsquo;s
- intelligence. And it seems simple enough, too, now Mike has thought of it;
- and with nothing further of pro or con, he prepares himself for the
- enterprise.
- </p>
- <p>
- For causes not clear to himself he says nothing to housewife Mollie of his
- plans. But he alarms that little lady of the establishment&rsquo;s few sparse
- pots and kettles by declining to eat his supper. Mollie fears Mike is ill.
- The latter, knowing by experience just as any animal might, that with
- twelve minutes of violent exercise before him, he is better without, while
- denying the imputation of illness, sticks to his supperless resolve.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Mike goes into the rear room and dons blue tights, blue sleeveless
- shirt, canvas trunks, and light shoes; his working costume. Over these he
- draws trousers and a blue sweater; on top of all a heavy double-breasted
- jacket. Thrusting his feet, light shoes and all, into heavy snow-proof
- overshoes, and pulling on a bicycle cap, Mike is arrayed for the street.
- Mollie knows of these several preparations, the ring costume under the
- street clothes, but thinks naught of it, such being Mike&rsquo;s nightly custom
- as he departs for the academy of Professor O&rsquo;Punch. At the last moment,
- Mike kisses both Mollie and little Davy; and then, with a sudden original
- enthusiasm, he says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve been thinkin&rsquo;, Mollie; mebby I can get some money. Mebby we&rsquo;ll see a
- good Christmas, after all.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Mollie is dazed by the notion of Mike thinking; but she looks in his face,
- with its honest eyes full of love for her and Davy, and as beautiful as a
- god&rsquo;s and as unsophisticated, and in spite of herself a hope begins to
- live and lift up its head. Possibly Mike may get money; and Christmas, and
- the rent, and many another matter then pinching the baby housekeeper and
- of which she has made no mention to Mike, will be met and considered.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;ll be nice if you should get money, Mike,&rdquo; is all Mollie trusts
- herself to say, as she returns Mike&rsquo;s good-bye kiss.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Mike gets into Pitt Street he moves slowly. There&rsquo;s the crowd, for
- one thing. Then, too, it&rsquo;s over early for his contest with the Terror.
- Mike prefers to arrive at the theatre just in time to strip and make the
- required application for those two hundred dollars. It may appear strange,
- but it never once occurs to Mike that he will not last the demanded four
- rounds. But it seems such a weighty sum! Mike doubts if the offer be
- earnest; hesitates with the fear that the management will refuse to give
- him the money at the end.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But surely,&rdquo; decides Mike, &ldquo;they will feel as though they ought to give
- me something. I lose a dollar by not going to Professor O&rsquo;Punch&rsquo;s; they
- must take account of that.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike loiters along with much inborn ease of heart. Occasionally he pauses
- to gaze into one of the cheap shop windows, ablaze and garish of the
- season&rsquo;s wares. There is no wind; the air has no point; but it is snowing
- softly, persistently, flakes of a mighty size and softness.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ten minutes before he arrives at that theatre which has been the scene of
- the Terror&rsquo;s triumphs, Mike enters a bakery whereof the proprietor, a
- German, is known to him. Mike has no money but he feels no confusion for
- that.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;John,&rdquo; says Mike to the German; &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve got to spar a little to-night and I
- want a big plate of soup.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Sure!&rdquo; says John, leading the way to a rear room which thrives greasily
- as a kind of restaurant. &ldquo;And here, Mike,&rdquo; goes on John, as the soup
- arrives, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll put a big drink of sherry in it. You will feel good because
- of it, and the sherry and the hot soup will make you quick and strong
- already.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- At the finish, Mike, with an eye of bland innocence&mdash;for he is
- certain the theatre will give him something, even if it withhold the full
- two hundred&mdash;tells John he will pay for the soup within the hour,
- when he returns.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s all right, Mike,&rdquo; cries the good-natured baker, &ldquo;any time will
- do.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This w&rsquo;y, me cove,&rdquo; observes a person with a cockney accent, as the sharp
- gamin delivers Mike, together with the message to the Terror, at the stage
- door; &ldquo;this w&rsquo;y; &rsquo;ere&rsquo;s a dressin&rsquo; room for you to shift your
- togs.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Later, when Mike&rsquo;s outer husks are off and he stands arrayed for the ring,
- this person, who is old and gray and wears a scarred and battered visage,
- looks Mike over in approval:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You seems an amazin&rsquo; bit of stuff, lad,&rdquo; says this worthy man; &ldquo;the build
- of Tom Sayres at his best, but&rsquo;eavier. I &rsquo;opes you&rsquo;ll do this Mick,
- but I&rsquo;m afeared on it. You looks too pretty; an&rsquo; you ain&rsquo;t got a fightin&rsquo;
- face. How &rsquo;eavy be you, lad?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;One hundred and eighty-one,&rdquo; replies Mike, smiling on the Englishman with
- his boy&rsquo;s eyes.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Can you spar a bit?&rdquo; asks the other.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why, of course I can!&rdquo; and Mike&rsquo;s tones exhibit surprise.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Well, laddy,&rdquo; says the other; &ldquo;don&rsquo;t let this Dublin bloke rattle you. &rsquo;E&rsquo;s
- a great blow&rsquo;ard, I takes it, an&rsquo; will quit if he runs ag&rsquo;in two or three
- stiff &rsquo;uns. A score of years ago, I&rsquo;d a-give &rsquo;im a stone an&rsquo;
- done for &rsquo;im myself. I&rsquo;m to be in your corner, laddy, an&rsquo; I trusts
- you&rsquo;ll not disgrace me.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Who are you?&rdquo; asks Mike.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Oh, me?&rdquo; says the other; &ldquo;I works for the theayter, laddy, an&rsquo;, bein&rsquo; as
- &rsquo;ow I&rsquo;m used to fightin&rsquo;, I goes on to &rsquo;eel an&rsquo; &rsquo;andle
- the amatoors as goes arter the Terror. It&rsquo;s all square, laddy; I&rsquo;ll be
- be&rsquo;ind you; an&rsquo; I&rsquo;ll &rsquo;elp you to win those pennies if I sees a
- w&rsquo;y.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I have also the honor,&rdquo; shouts the loud master of ceremonies, &ldquo;to
- introduce to you Mike Men-ares, who will contend with the Dublin Terror.
- Should he stay four rounds, Marquis of Queens-berry rules, the management
- forfeits two hundred dollars to the said Menares.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What a model for my Jason,&rdquo; says a thin shaving of a man who stands as a
- spectator in the wings. He is an artist of note, and speaks to a friend at
- his elbow. &ldquo;What a model for my Jason! I will give him five dollars an
- hour for three hours a day. What&rsquo;s his name? Mike what?&rdquo; The battle is
- about to commence; the friend, tongue-tied of interest, makes no reply.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Dublin Terror is a rugged, powerful ruffian, with lumpy shoulders,
- thick short neck, and a shock gorilla head. His little gray eyes are
- lighted fiercely. His expression is as savagely bitter as Mike&rsquo;s is
- gentle. The creature, a fighter by nature, was born meaning harm to other
- men.
- </p>
- <p>
- There is a roped square, about eighteen feet each way, on the stage, in
- which the gladiators will box. The floor is canvas made safe with rosin.
- The master of cermonies, himself a pugilist of celebration, will act as
- referee. The old battered man of White Chapel is in Mike&rsquo;s corner.
- </p>
- <p>
- Another gentleman, with face similarly marred, but with Seven Dials as his
- nesting place, is posted opposite to befriend the Terror. There is much
- buzz in the audience&mdash;a rude gathering, it is&mdash;and a deal of
- sympathetic admiration and not a ray of hope for Mike in the eyes of those
- present.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Terror is replete of a riotous confidence and savage to begin. For two
- nights, such is the awe of him engendered among local bruisers, no one has
- presented himself for a meeting. This has made the Terror hungry for a
- battle; he feels like a bear unfed. As he stands over from Mike awaiting
- the call of &ldquo;Time,&rdquo; he looks formidable and forbidding, with his knotted
- arms and mighty hands.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike lounges in his place, the perfection of the athlete and picture of
- grace with power. His face, full of vacant amiability, shows pleased and
- interested as he looks out on the crowded, rampant house. Mike has rather
- the air of a spectator than a principal. The crowd does not shake him; he
- is not disturbed by the situation. In a fashion, he has been through the
- same thing every night, save Sunday, for three years. It comes commonplace
- enough to Mike.
- </p>
- <p>
- In a blurred way Mike resents the blood-eagerness which glows in the eyes
- of his enemy; but he knows no fear. It serves to remind him, however, that
- no restraints are laid upon him in favor of the brute across the ring, and
- that he is at liberty to hit with what lust he will.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Time!&rdquo; suddenly calls the referee.
- </p>
- <p>
- Those who entertained a forbode of trouble ahead for Mike are agreeably
- surprised. With the word &ldquo;Time!&rdquo; Mike springs into tremendous life like a
- panther aroused. His dark eyes glow and gleam in a manner to daunt.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Terror, a gallant headlong ruffian, throws himself upon Mike like a
- tornado. For full two minutes his blows fall like a storm. It does not
- seem of things possible that man could last through such a tempest. But
- Mike lasts; more than that, every blow of the Terror is stopped or
- avoided.
- </p>
- <p>
- It runs off like a miracle to the onlookers, most of whom know somewhat of
- self-defensive arts. That Mike makes no reprisals, essays no counterhits,
- does not surprise. A cautious wisdom would teach him to feel out and learn
- his man. Moreover, Mike is not there to attack; his mere mission is to
- stay four rounds.
- </p>
- <p>
- While spectators, with approving comment on Mike&rsquo;s skill and quickness,
- are reminding one another that Mike&rsquo;s business is &ldquo;simply to stay,&rdquo; Mike
- himself is coming to a different thought. He has grown disgusted rather
- than enraged by the attacks of the Terror. His thrice-trained eye notes
- each detail of what moves as a whirlwind to folk looking on; his arm and
- foot provide automatically for his defense and without direct effort of
- the brain. This leaves Mike&rsquo;s mind, dull as it is, with nothing to engage
- itself about save a contemplation of the Terror. In sluggish sort Mike
- begins to hold a vast dislike for that furious person.
- </p>
- <p>
- As this dislike commences to fire incipiently, he recalls the picture of
- Mollie and little Davy of the crutch. Mike remembers that it is after ten
- o&rsquo;clock, and his two treasures must be deep in sleep. Then he considers of
- Christmas, now but a day away; and of the money so necessary to the full
- pleasure of his sleeping Mollie and little Davy.
- </p>
- <p>
- As those home-visions come to Mike, and his antipathy to the Terror
- mounting to its height, the grim impulse claims him to attack. Tigerlike
- he steps back to get his distance; then he springs forward. It is too
- quickly done for eye to follow. The Terror&rsquo;s guard is opened by a feint;
- and next like a flash Mike&rsquo;s left shoots cleanly in. There is a sharp
- &ldquo;spank!&rdquo; as the six-ounce glove finds the Terror&rsquo;s jaw; that person goes
- down like an oak that is felled. As he falls, Mike&rsquo;s right starts with a
- crash for the heart. But there is no need: Mike stops the full blow midway&mdash;a
- feat without a mate in boxing. The Terror lies as one without life.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;W&rsquo;y didn&rsquo;t you let &rsquo;im &rsquo;ave your right like you started,
- laddy?&rdquo; screams the old Cockney, as Mike walks towards his corner.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike laughs in his way of gentle, soft goodnature, and points where the
- Terror, white and senseless, bleeds thinly at nose and ear.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The left did it,&rdquo; Mike replies.
- </p>
- <p>
- Out of his eyes the hot light is already dying. He takes a deep, deep
- breath, that arches his great breast and makes the muscles clutch and
- climb like serpents; he stretches himself by extending his arms and
- standing high on his toes. Meanwhile he beams pleasantly on his grizzled
- adherent.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It wasn&rsquo;t much,&rdquo; says Mike.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You be the coolest cove, laddy!&rdquo; retorts the other in a rapt whisper.
- Then he towels deftly at the sweat on Mike&rsquo;s forehead.
- </p>
- <p>
- The decision has been given in Mike&rsquo;s favor. And to his delight, without
- argument or hesitation, the loud young man of the vociferous garb comes
- behind the scenes and endows him with two hundred dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Say,&rdquo; observes the loud young man, admiringly, &ldquo;you ain&rsquo;t no wonder, I
- don&rsquo;t t&rsquo;ink!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But how did you come to do it, Mike?&rdquo; asks the good-natured baker, as
- Mike lingers over a midnight porterhouse at the latter&rsquo;s restaurant.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I had to, John,&rdquo; says Mike, turning his innocent face on the other; &ldquo;I
- had to win Christmas money for Mollie and little Davy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And what,&rdquo; said the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;became of this Mike Menares?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I should suppose,&rdquo; broke in the Red Nosed Gentleman, who had followed the
- Jolly Doctor&rsquo;s narrative with relish, &ldquo;I should suppose now he posed for
- the little sculptor&rsquo;s Jason.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is my belief he did,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor, with a twinkle, &ldquo;and
- in the end he became full partner of the bruiser, O&rsquo;Punch, and shared the
- profits of the gymnasium instead of taking a dollar a night for his
- labors. His sister grew up and married, which, when one reflects on the
- experience of her mother, shows she owned no little of her brother&rsquo;s
- courage.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Your story,&rdquo; remarked the Red Nosed Gentleman to the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;and
- the terrific blow which this Menares dealt the Dublin Terror brings to mv
- mind a blow my father once struck.&rdquo; This was a cue to the others and one
- quickly seized on; the Red Nosed Gentleman was urged to give the story of
- that paternal blow. First seeing to it that the stock of burgundy at his
- elbow was ample, and freighting his own and the Jolly Doctor&rsquo;s glasses to
- the brim, the Red Nosed Gentleman coughed, cleared his throat, and then
- gave us the tale of That Stolen Ace of Hearts.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0008" id="link2HCH0008"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER VIII.&mdash;THAT STOLEN ACE OF HEARTS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>hen I, at the
- unripe age of seventeen, left my father&rsquo;s poor cottage-house on Tom&rsquo;s Run
- and threw myself into life&rsquo;s struggle, I sought Pittsburg as a nearest
- promising arena of effort. I had a small place at a smaller wage as a sort
- of office boy and porter for a down-town establishment devoted to a
- commerce of iron; but as I came early to cut my connection with that hard
- emporium we will not dwell thereon.
- </p>
- <p>
- I have already told you how by nature I was a gambler. I had inborn
- hankerings after games of chance, and it was scant time, indeed, before I
- found myself on terms of more or less near acquaintance with every card
- sharper of the city. And I became under their improper tutelage an expert
- cheat myself. At short cards and such devices as faro and roulette, I soon
- knew each devious turn and was in excellent qualification to pillage my
- way to eminence if not to riches among the nimble-fingered nobility of the
- green tables into whose midst I had coaxed or crowded my way. Vast was my
- ambition to soar as a blackleg, and no student at his honest books burned
- with more fire to succeed. I became initiate into such mysteries as the
- &ldquo;bug,&rdquo; the &ldquo;punch,&rdquo; the &ldquo;hold-out&rdquo;; I could deal &ldquo;double&rdquo; or &ldquo;from the
- bottom;&rdquo; was a past master of those dubious faro inventions, the &ldquo;snake,&rdquo;
- the &ldquo;end squeeze,&rdquo; and the &ldquo;balance top;&rdquo; could &ldquo;put back&rdquo; with a clean
- deftness that might deceive even my masters in evil doing, and with an eye
- like a hawk read a deck of marked cards with the same easy certainty that
- I read the alphabet. It was a common compliment to my guilty merit that no
- better craftsman at crooked play ever walked in Diamond Alley.
- </p>
- <p>
- No, as I&rsquo;ve heretofore explained, there dawned a day when I gave up card
- gambling and played no more. It is now twenty years since I wagered so
- much as a two-bit piece in any game other than the Wall Street game of
- stocks. And yet it was no moral arousal that drew me from roulette, from
- farobank and from draw poker. I merely awoke to the truth that the
- greatest simpleton of cards is the professional gambler himself; and with
- that I turned my back on the whole scurvy business and quit the dens for
- the exchange. And with no purpose to preach, I say openly and with a
- fullest freedom that the game of stock speculation is as replete of traps
- and pitfalls, and of as false and blackleg character as any worst game of
- iniquitous faro that is dealt with trimmed and sanded deck from a
- dishonest box. As an arena of morals the stock exchange presents no
- conscious improvement beyond what is offered by the veriest dead-fall ever
- made elate with those two rings at the bell which tell the waiting inmates
- that some &ldquo;steerer&rdquo; is on the threshold with rustic victim to be fleeced.
- I once read that the homestead of Captain Kidd, the pirate, stood two
- centuries ago on that plot of ground now covered by the New York Stock
- Exchange; and I confess to a smile when I reflected how the spirit of
- immortal rapine would seem to hover over the place. The exchange is a fit
- successor to the habitat of that wild freebooter who died and dried in
- execution dock when long ago the Stuart Anne was queen.
- </p>
- <p>
- During those earlier months in Pittsburg, I was not permitted by my father&mdash;who
- had much control of me, even unto the day of his death&mdash;to altogether
- abandon Tom&rsquo;s Run, and the good, grimy miner folk, its inhabitants. My
- week&rsquo;s holiday began with each Saturday&rsquo;s noon; from that hour until
- Monday morning I was free; and thus, obeying my father&rsquo;s behests, Saturday
- evening and Sunday, I was bound to pass beneath my parents&rsquo; roof.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was during one of these visits home when I first cheated at cards&mdash;memorable
- event!&mdash;and it was on another that my roguery was discovered and my
- father struck that blow.
- </p>
- <p>
- As already stated, my father was of Welsh extraction. It was no less the
- fact, however, that his original stock was Irish; his grandfather&mdash;I
- believe it to have been that venerable and I trust respected gentleman&mdash;coming
- to Wales from somewhere on the banks of the Blackwater. And my father,
- excellent man! had vast pride in his Irish lineage and grew never so
- angry, particularly if a bit heated of his Saturday evening cups, as when
- one spoke of him as offshoot of the rocky land of leeks and saintly David.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What!&rdquo; he would cry; &ldquo;because I was born in Wales, do you take me for an
- onion-eating Welshman? Man, I&rsquo;m Irish and don&rsquo;t make that mistake again!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The vigor wherewith his mine-hardened fist smote the table as conclusion
- to this, carried such weight of emphasis that no man was ever found to
- fall a second time into the error.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myself, the question whether my ancestors were Welsh or Irish held
- little interest. I was looking forward not backward, and a hot avarice to
- hunt dollars drove from my bosom the last trace of concern touching a
- genealogy. I would sooner have one year&rsquo;s run of uninterrupted luck at a
- gambling table than to know myself a direct descendant of the
- Plantagenets. Not so my dear old father; to the hour when death closed his
- eyes&mdash;already sightless for ten years&mdash;burned out with a blast,
- they were&mdash;he ceased not to regale me with tales of that noble line
- of dauntless Irish from whom we drew our blood. For the ten years
- following the destruction of his eyes by powder, I saw much of my father,
- for I established him at a little country tavern near enough to the ocean
- to hear the surf and smell the salt breath of it, and two or three times a
- week I made shift to get down where he was. And whether my stay was for an
- hour or for a night&mdash;as on Sunday this latter came often to be the
- chance&mdash;he made his pedigree, or what he dreamed was such, the proud
- burden of his conversation.
- </p>
- <p>
- Brian Boru, I remember, was an original wellhead of our family. My father
- was tireless in his settings forth of this hero king of Munster; nor did
- he fail at the close of his story to curse the assassin who struck down
- Boru at Clontarf. Sometimes to tease him, I&rsquo;d argue what must have been
- the weak and primitive inconsequence of the royal Boru. I&rsquo;d suggest that
- by the sheer narrowness and savagery of the hour wherein that monarch
- lived, he could have been nothing more royal than the mere king of a kale
- patch, and probably wore less of authority with still less of revenue and
- reverence than belong commonly with any district leader of Tammany Hall.
- </p>
- <p>
- At these base doubtings my parent&rsquo;s wrath would mount. He would wax vivid
- with a picture of the majesty and grandeur of the great Boru; and of the
- halls wherein he fed and housed a thousand knights compared with whom in
- riches, magnificence, and chivalrous feats those warriors who came about
- King Arthur&rsquo;s round table showed paltry, mean and low. To crown narration
- he would ascribe to Boru credit as a world&rsquo;s first law giver and hail him
- author of the &ldquo;Code Brian.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Shure!&rdquo; he would say; &ldquo;he called his scholars and his penmen about him
- and he made them write down as the wor-rds fell from th&rsquo; mouth av him th&rsquo;
- whole of th&rsquo; Code Brian; an&rsquo; this in tur-rn was a model of th&rsquo; Code
- Napoleon that makes th&rsquo; law av Fr-rance to-day.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was in vain I pointed out that Napoleon&rsquo;s Code found its roots and as
- well, its models, in the Corpus Juris Civilis of Justinian&mdash;I had
- learned so much Latin from Father Glennon&mdash;and that nowhere in the
- English law was the Code Brian, as he called it, so much as adverted to.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; that&rsquo;s th&rsquo; Sassenach jealousy av thim!&rdquo; he would say. &ldquo;An&rsquo; who was
- this Justinian? Who, indade, but a thievin&rsquo; Roman imp&rsquo;ror who shtole his
- laws from King Boru just as th&rsquo; Dagoes now are shtealin&rsquo; th&rsquo; jobs at th&rsquo;
- mines from th&rsquo; Irish an&rsquo; Welsh lads to whom they belong av r-rights.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- After this I said no more; I did not explain that Justinian and his
- Pandects and the others of his grand body of civil law were in existence
- five centuries before the martyred Boru was born. That discovery would
- have served no purpose beyond my parent&rsquo;s exasperation and earned for
- myself as well as the world&rsquo;s historians naught save a cataract of hard
- words.
- </p>
- <p>
- You marvel, perhaps, why I dwell with such length on the memory of my
- father&mdash;a poor, blind, ignorant miner of coal! I loved the old man;
- and to this day when my hair, too, is gray and when I may win my wealth
- and count my wealth and keep my wealth with any of the land, I recall him
- as the only man for whom I ever felt either love or confidence or real
- respect.
- </p>
- <p>
- Yes; I heard much of the blood of the truculent yet wise Boru; also of
- younger ancestors who fought for the Stuarts against Cromwell, against
- Monmouth, against William; and later in both the &ldquo;Fifteen&rdquo; and in the
- &ldquo;Forty-five.&rdquo; Peculiarly was I made to know of my mother&rsquo;s close
- connection by blood with the house of that brave Sarsfield &ldquo;who,&rdquo; as my
- father explained, &ldquo;fairly withstud th&rsquo; Dootchman at th&rsquo; Boyne; an&rsquo; later
- made him quit befure th&rsquo; walls av Limerick.&rdquo; There was one tradition of
- the renowned Sarsfield which the old gentleman was peculiarly prone to
- relate, and on the head of him who distrusted the legend there was sure to
- fall a storm. That particular tale concerned the Irish soldier and the
- sword of Wallace wight.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thish William Wallace,&rdquo; my father was wont to say as he approached the
- myth, &ldquo;was a joint (giant), no less. He was nine fut &rsquo;leven inches
- tall an&rsquo; his soord was eight fut foore inches long. It&rsquo;s in Stirlin&rsquo;
- Cashtle now, an&rsquo; there niver was but one man besides Wallace who cud
- handle it. Th&rsquo; Black Douglas an&rsquo; all av thim Scotchmen thried it an&rsquo;
- failed. Whin, one day, along comes Gin&rsquo;ral Patrick Sarsfield&mdash;a
- little bit av a felly, only five fut siven inches tall&mdash;an&rsquo; he tuk
- that soord av William Wallace in one hand an&rsquo;, me son, he made it
- whishtle.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But I must press to my first crime of cards or your patience will desert.
- During those summer months on Tom&rsquo;s Run when the mines were open and my
- father and his mates of the pick and blast were earning their narrow pay,
- it was the habit of himself and four or five other gentlemen of coal to
- gather in the Toni&rsquo;s Run Arms when Saturday evening came on, and relax
- into that amusement dear to Ireland as &ldquo;forty-five.&rdquo; Usually they played
- for a dime a corner; on occasional rich evenings the stakes mounted
- dizzily to two-bits, though this last was not often.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now I was preyed on by a desire to make one at this Saturday contention,
- but my father would never consent.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Jack,&rdquo; he&rsquo;d say; &ldquo;you&rsquo;d only lose your money. Shure! you&rsquo;re nawthin&rsquo; but
- a boy an&rsquo; not fit to pla-ay cards with th&rsquo; loikes av grown-up men.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But I persisted; I argued&mdash;to myself, you may be certain&mdash;while
- I might be no match for these old professors of forty-five who played the
- game with never a mistake, if I, like them, played honestly, that the
- cunning work I meditated could not fail to bring me in the wealth.
- </p>
- <p>
- At last one of the others came to my rescue.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Let him pla-ay, Mishter Roche,&rdquo; he said. &ldquo;Let&rsquo;s win his money fr-rom him
- an&rsquo; it&rsquo;ll be a lesson. He&rsquo;ll not lose much befure he&rsquo;ll be gla-ad to
- quit.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;All right, thin,&rdquo; replied my father; &ldquo;you can pla-ay, Jack, till you lose
- fifty cints; an&rsquo; that&rsquo;ll do ye. Moind now! whin you lose fifty cints you
- shtop.&rdquo; And so I was made one of the circle.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I foresaw, I did not lose the four-bits which my indulgent parent had
- marked as the limits of farthest sacrifice to my ambitious innocence.
- Already I had brought back to Tom&rsquo;s Run a curious trick or two from
- Pittsburg. It soon came to be my &ldquo;deal,&rdquo; and the moment I got the cards in
- my hands I abstracted the ace of hearts&mdash;a most doughty creature in
- this game of forty-five!&mdash;and dropped it in my lap, covering the fact
- from vulgar eyes with a fold of my handkerchief. That was all the chicane
- I practiced; I kept myself in constant possession of the ace of hearts and
- played it at a crisis; and at once the wagered dimes of the others began
- to travel into my illicit pockets where they made a merry jingle, I
- warrant you!
- </p>
- <p>
- The honest Irish from whom I was filching these small tributes never once
- bethought that I might play them sharp; they attributed my gains to luck
- and loud was exclamation over my good fortune. Time and again, for I was
- not their equal as a mere player, I&rsquo;d board the wrong card. When I&rsquo;d make
- such a mistake, one of them would cry: &ldquo;D&rsquo;ye moind that now! D&rsquo;ye moind
- how ba-ad he plays!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; yet,&rdquo; another would add, &ldquo;an&rsquo; yet he rakes th&rsquo; money!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Altogether I regarded my entrance into this ten-cent game of forty-five a
- most felicitous affair. I won at every sitting; getting up on some
- occasions with as much as eight dollars of profit for my evening&rsquo;s work.
- In those days I went willingly to Tom&rsquo;s Run, quitting Pittsburg without a
- sigh; and such was my ardor to fleece these coaldigging comrades of my
- father&mdash;and for that matter, my father, also; for like your true
- gambler, I played no favorites and was as warm to gather in the dimes of
- my parent as any&mdash;that I was usually found waiting about the
- forty-five table when, following supper, they appeared. And it all went
- favorably with me for perhaps a dozen sittings; my aggregate gains must
- have reached the mighty sum of sixty dollars. Of a merry verity! silver
- was at high tide in my hands!
- </p>
- <p>
- One evening as the half dozen devoted to the science of forty-five drew up
- to the table&mdash;myself a stripling boy, the others bearded miner men&mdash;my
- father complained of an ache in his head or an ache in his stomach or some
- malady equally cogent, and said he would not play.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll have me poipe an&rsquo; me mug av beer,&rdquo; he said, &ldquo;an&rsquo; resht mesilf a bit.
- It&rsquo;s loike I&rsquo;ll feel betther afther a whoile an&rsquo; then I&rsquo;ll take a haand.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Play began, while my suffering father with his aches, his tobacco and his
- beer, sat nursing himself at a near-by table. I lost no time in acquiring
- my magic ace of hearts and at once the stream of usual fortune set in to
- flow my way.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ten years, yes, one year later, my suspicions touching my father&rsquo;s illness
- and his reasons for this unprecedented respite from the cares of
- forty-five would have stood more on tiptoe. As it was, however, it never
- assailed me as a thought that I had become the subject of ancestral
- doubts. I cheated on and on, and made hay while the sun shone with never a
- cloud in the sky.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was not noticed by me, but following a halfhour&rsquo;s play and while I was
- shuffling the cards for a deal, my parent stole noiselessly behind my
- chair. He reached under my arm and lifted the corner of the concealing
- handkerchief which filled my lap. Horrors! there lay the tell-tale ace of
- hearts!
- </p>
- <p>
- Even then I realized nothing and knew not that my villainy was made bare.
- This news, however, was not long in its arrival.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Niver did I r-raise a boy to be a r-robber!&rdquo; roared my father.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coincident with this remark, the paternal hand&mdash;not the lightest nor
- least formidable on Tom&rsquo;s Run&mdash;dealt me a buffet on the head that
- lifted me from my sinful chair and hurled me across the room and against
- the wall full fifteen feet away. My teeth clattered, my wits reeled, while
- my ill-gotten silver danced blithely to metallic music of its own.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Niver did I r-raise a boy to be a r-robber!&rdquo; again shouted my father.
- Then seizing me by the collar, he lifted me to my feet. &ldquo;Put all your
- money on the ta-able!&rdquo; he cried; &ldquo;put ivry groat av it!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- There was no escape; I was powerless in the talons of an inexorable fate.
- My pockets yielded a harvest of hardby seventy-five dollars&mdash;something
- more than the total of my winnings&mdash;and this was placed in the center
- of the table which had so lately witnessed my skill. An even distribution
- was then made by my father among the victims, each getting his share of
- the recovered treasure; my father keeping none for himself though urged by
- the others to that end.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;No,&rdquo; said my father; &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll touch niver a penny av it. You take th&rsquo; money;
- I&rsquo;ll make shift that the dishgrace of bein&rsquo; fa-ather to a rapparee shall
- do for me share!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- With that, he withdrew from the scene of my downfall, carrying me fast in
- his clutch; and later&mdash;bathed in tears of pain and shame&mdash;I was
- dragged into the presence of my mother and Father Glennon by the
- ignominious ear.
- </p>
- <p>
- It did not cure me of cards, however; I ran the whole gamut of gambling
- and won dangerous prominence as a sharper of elevation and rank. To-morrow
- evening, should you care to listen, I may unfold concerning other of my
- adventures; I may even relate&mdash;as a tale most to my diplomatic glory,
- perhaps&mdash;how I brought Casino Joe to endow me with that great secret,
- richer, in truth! than the mines of Peru! of &ldquo;How to Tell the Last Four.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Speakin&rsquo; of gamblin&rsquo;,&rdquo; observed the Old Cattleman when the Red Nosed
- Gentleman had come to a full stop, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll bet a bloo stack that as we-alls
- sets yere talkin&rsquo;, the games is goin&rsquo; brisk an&rsquo; hot in Wolfville. Thar
- won&rsquo;t be no three foot of snow to put a damper on trade an&rsquo; hobble a
- gent&rsquo;s energies in Arizona.&rdquo; This last with a flush of pride.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Does everybody gamble in the West?&rdquo; asked the Sour Gentleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Every sport who&rsquo;s got the dinero does,&rdquo; responded the Old Cattleman.
- &ldquo;White folks, Injuns an&rsquo; Mexicans is right now at roulette an&rsquo; faro bank
- an&rsquo; monte as though they ain&rsquo;t got a minute to live. I hates to concede &rsquo;em
- so much darin&rsquo;, but the Mexicans, speshul, is zealous for specyoolations.
- Which they&rsquo;d shore wager their immortal souls on the turn of a kyard, only
- a Greaser&rsquo;s soul don&rsquo;t own no market valyoo.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;If you will,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;you might tell us something of
- Mexicans and their ways, their labors and relaxations&mdash;their loves
- and their hates. I&rsquo;d be pleased to hear of those interesting people from
- one who knows them so thoroughly.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which I shore knows &rsquo;em,&rdquo; returned the Old Cattleman, &ldquo;an&rsquo; as I
- concedes how each gent present oughter b&rsquo;ar his share of the
- entertainment, I&rsquo;ll tell you of Chiquita of Chaparita.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0009" id="link2HCH0009"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER IX.&mdash;CHIQUITA OF CHAPARITA.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>hich I doubts some
- if I&rsquo;m a proper party to be a historian of Mexicans. Nacherally I abhors
- &rsquo;em; an&rsquo; when a gent abhors anything, that is a Caucasian gent,
- you-all can gamble the limit he won&rsquo;t do it jestice. His prejudices is
- bound to hit the surface like one of these yere rock ledges in the
- mountains. Be white folks ag&rsquo;in Mexicans? Gents, the paleface is ag&rsquo;in
- everybody but himse&rsquo;f; ag&rsquo;in Mexicans, niggers, Injuns, Chinks&mdash;he&rsquo;s
- ag&rsquo;in &rsquo;em all; the paleface is overbearin&rsquo; an&rsquo; insolent, an&rsquo;
- because he&rsquo;s the gamest fighter he allows he&rsquo;s app&rsquo;inted of Providence to
- prance &lsquo;round, tyrannizin&rsquo; an&rsquo; makin&rsquo; trouble for everybody whose color
- don&rsquo;t match his own. Shore, I&rsquo;m as bad as others; only I ain&rsquo;t so bigoted
- I don&rsquo;t savey the fact.
- </p>
- <p>
- Doc Peets is the one white gent I encounters who&rsquo;s willin&rsquo; to mete out to
- Mexicans a squar&rsquo; deal from a squar&rsquo; deck. I allers reckons these yere
- equities on Peets&rsquo; part arises a heap from his bein&rsquo; a scientist. You take
- a scientist like Peets an&rsquo; the science in him sort o&rsquo; submerges an&rsquo; drowns
- out what you-all might term the racial notions native to the hooman soil.
- They comes to concloosions dispassionate, that a-way, scientists does; an&rsquo;
- Mexicans an&rsquo; Injuns reaps a milder racket at their hands. With sech folks
- as Old Man Enright an&rsquo; me, who&rsquo;s more indoorated an&rsquo; acts on that
- arrogance which belongs with white folks at birth, inferior races don&rsquo;t
- stand no dazzlin&rsquo; show.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mexicans, as a herd, is stunted an&rsquo; ondeveloped both mental an&rsquo; physical.
- They bears the same compar&rsquo;son to white folks that these yere little
- broncos does to the big hosses of the States. In intellects, Mexicans is
- about &rsquo;leven hands high. To go into one of their jimcrow plazas is
- like retreatin&rsquo; back&rsquo;ard three hundred years. Their idees of agriculture
- is plenty primitive. An&rsquo; their minds is that bogged down in ignorance
- you-all can&rsquo;t teach &rsquo;em nothin&rsquo;. They clings to their worm-eaten
- customs like a miser to his money. Their plow is a wedge of wood; they
- hooks on about three yoke of bulls&mdash;measley, locoed critters&mdash;an&rsquo;
- with four or five Greasers to screech an&rsquo; herd an&rsquo; chunk up the anamiles
- they goes stampedin&rsquo; back&rsquo;ard an&rsquo; for&rsquo;ard on their sandy river-bottom
- fields&mdash;the same bein&rsquo; about as big as a saddle blanket&mdash;an&rsquo;
- they calls that plowin&rsquo;. They sows the grain as they plows, sort o&rsquo;
- scratches it in; an&rsquo; when it comes up they don&rsquo;t cut it none same as
- we-all harvests a crop. No; they ain&rsquo;t capable of sech wisdom. They pulls
- it up by the roots an&rsquo; ties it in bundles. Then they sweeps off a clean
- spot of earth like the floor of one of these yere brickyards an&rsquo; covers it
- with the grain same as if it&rsquo;s a big mat. Thar&rsquo;s a corral constructed
- &lsquo;round it of posts an&rsquo; lariats; an&rsquo; next, on top of the mat of grain, they
- drives in the loose burros, cattle, goats, an&rsquo; all things else that&rsquo;s got
- a hoof; an&rsquo; tharupon they jams this menagerie about ontil the grain is
- trodden out. That&rsquo;s what a Greaser regyards as threshin&rsquo; grain, so you can
- estimate how ediotic he is. When it&rsquo;s trompled sufficient, he packs off
- the stalks an&rsquo; straw to make mats an&rsquo; thatches for the &rsquo;dobies;
- while he scrapes up the dust an&rsquo; wheat into a blanket an&rsquo; climbs onto the
- roof of his <i>casa</i> an&rsquo; pours it down slow onto the ground, an&rsquo; all so
- it gives the wind a openin&rsquo; to get action an&rsquo; blow away the chaff an&rsquo;
- dust.
- </p>
- <p>
- But what&rsquo;s the use of dilatin&rsquo; on savageries like that? I could push
- for&rsquo;ard an&rsquo; relate how they makes flour with a stone rollin&rsquo;-pin in a
- stone trough; how they grinds coffee by wroppin&rsquo; it in a gunny sack an&rsquo;
- beatin&rsquo; it with a rock; but where&rsquo;s the good? It would only go lowerin&rsquo;
- your estimates of hooman nature to no end.
- </p>
- <p>
- Whatever be their amoosements? Everything on earth amooses &rsquo;em.
- They has so many holidays, Mexicans does, they ain&rsquo;t hardly left no time
- for work. They&rsquo;re pirootin&rsquo; about constant, grinnin&rsquo; an&rsquo; chatterin&rsquo; like a
- outfit of bloo-jays.
- </p>
- <p>
- No; they ain&rsquo;t singers none. Takin&rsquo; feet an&rsquo; fingers, that a-way, a
- Mexican is moosical. They emerges a heap strong at dancin&rsquo;, an&rsquo; when it
- conies to a fandango, hens on hot griddles is examples of listless
- abstraction to &rsquo;em. With sech weepons, too, as guitars an&rsquo; fiddles
- an&rsquo; a gourd half-full of gravel to shake an&rsquo; beat out the time, they can
- make the scenery ring. Thar they stops, however; a Greaser&rsquo;s moosic never
- mounts higher than the hands. At singin&rsquo;, crows an&rsquo; guinea chickens lays
- over &rsquo;em like a spade flush over nines-up.
- </p>
- <p>
- Most likely if I reelates to you-all the story of a day among the Mexicans
- you comes to a cl&rsquo;arer glimpse of their loves an&rsquo; hates an&rsquo; wars an&rsquo;
- merry-makin&rsquo;s. Mexicans, like Injuns when a paleface is about, lapses into
- shyness an&rsquo; timidity same as one of these yere cottontail rabbits. But
- among themse&rsquo;fs, when they feels onbuckled an&rsquo; at home, their play runs
- off plenty different. Tharfore a gent&rsquo;s got to study Mexicans onder
- friendly auspices, an&rsquo; from the angle of their own home-life, if he&rsquo;s out
- to rope onto concloosions concernin&rsquo; them that&rsquo;ll stand the tests of
- trooth.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s one time when I&rsquo;m camped in the Plaza Chaparita. It&rsquo;s doorin&rsquo; the
- eepock when I freights from Vegas to the Canadian over the old Fort Bascom
- trail. One of the mules&mdash;the nigh swing mule, he is&mdash;quits on
- me, an&rsquo; I has to lay by ontil that mule recovers his sperits.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s a <i>fieste</i> or holiday at the Plaza Chaparita. The first local
- sport I connects with is the padre. He&rsquo;s little, brown, an&rsquo; friendly; an&rsquo;
- has twinklin&rsquo; beady eyes like a rattlesnake; the big difference bein&rsquo; that
- the padre&rsquo;s eyes is full of fun, whereas the optics of rattlesnakes is
- deevoid of humor utter. Shore; rattlesnakes wouldn&rsquo;t know a joke from the
- ace of clubs.
- </p>
- <p>
- The padre&rsquo;s on his way to the &rsquo;dobe church; an&rsquo; what do you-all
- figger now that divine&rsquo;s got onder his arm? Hymn books, says you? That&rsquo;s
- where you&rsquo;re barkin&rsquo; at a knot. The padre&rsquo;s packin&rsquo; a game chicken&mdash;which
- the steel gaffs, drop-socket they be an&rsquo; of latest sort, is in his pocket&mdash;an&rsquo;
- as I goes squanderin&rsquo; along in his company, he informs me that followin&rsquo;
- the services thar&rsquo;ll be a fight between his chicken an&rsquo; a rival brass-back
- belongin&rsquo; to a commoonicant named Romero. The padre desires my presence,
- an&rsquo; in a sperit of p&rsquo;liteness I allows I&rsquo;ll come idlein&rsquo; over onless
- otherwise engaged, the same bein&rsquo; onlikely.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gents, you should have witnessed that battle! It&rsquo;s shore lively carnage;
- yes, the padre&rsquo;s bird wins an&rsquo; downs Romero&rsquo;s entry the second buckle.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the tail of the padre&rsquo;s triumph, one of his parishioners gets locoed,
- shakes a chicken outen a bag an&rsquo; proclaims that he&rsquo;ll fight him ag&rsquo;in the
- world for two dollars a side. At that another enthoosiast gives notice
- that if the first parishioner will pinch down his bluff to one dollar&mdash;he
- says he don&rsquo;t believe in losin&rsquo; an&rsquo; winnin&rsquo; fortunes on a chicken&mdash;he&rsquo;ll
- prodooce a bird an&rsquo; go him once.
- </p>
- <p>
- The match is made, an&rsquo; while the chickens is facin&rsquo; each other a heap
- feverish an&rsquo; fretful, peckin&rsquo; an&rsquo; see-sawin&rsquo; for a openin&rsquo;, the various
- Greasers who&rsquo;s bet money on &rsquo;em lugs out their beads an&rsquo; begins to
- pray to beat four of a kind. Shore, they&rsquo;re prayin&rsquo; that their partic&rsquo;lar
- chicken &rsquo;ll win. Still, when I considers that about as many
- Greasers is throwin&rsquo; themse&rsquo;fs at the throne of grace for one as for the
- other, if Providence is payin&rsquo; any attention to &rsquo;em&mdash;an&rsquo; I
- deems it doubtful&mdash;I estimates that them orisons is a stand-off.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the birds goes to the center, one party sprinkles something on his
- chicken. At that the opposition grabs up his bird an&rsquo; appeals to the
- padre. He challenges the other&rsquo;s bird because he says he&rsquo;s been sprinkled
- with holy-water.
- </p>
- <p>
- The padre inquires, an&rsquo; the holy-water sharp confesses his guilt. Also, he
- admits that he hides the gaffs onder the altar cloth doorin&rsquo; the recent
- services so they&rsquo;ll acquire extra grace an&rsquo; power.
- </p>
- <p>
- The padre turns severe at this an&rsquo; declar&rsquo;s the fight off; an&rsquo; he forfeits
- the doctored chicken an&rsquo; the gaffs to himse&rsquo;f a whole lot&mdash;he
- representin&rsquo; the church&mdash;to teach the holy-water sharp that yereafter
- he&rsquo;s not to go seizin&rsquo; onfair advantages, an&rsquo; to lead a happier an&rsquo; a
- better life. That culprit don&rsquo;t say a word but passes over his chicken an&rsquo;
- the steel regalia for its heels. You can bet that padre&rsquo;s word is law in
- the Plaza Chaparita!
- </p>
- <p>
- Followin&rsquo; this fiasco of the holy-water chicken the Mexicans disperses
- themse&rsquo;fs to pulque an&rsquo; monte an&rsquo; the dance. The padre an&rsquo; me sa&rsquo;nters
- about; me bein&rsquo; a Americano, an&rsquo; him what you might call professionally
- sedate, we-all don&rsquo;t go buttin&rsquo; into the <i>baile</i> nor the pulque nor
- the gamblin&rsquo;. The padre su&rsquo;gests that we go a-weavin&rsquo; over to his own
- camp, which he refers to as Casa Dolores&mdash;though thar&rsquo;s nothin&rsquo;
- dolorous about it, the same bein&rsquo; the home of mirth an&rsquo; hilarity, that
- a-way&mdash;an&rsquo; he allows he&rsquo;s got some Valley Tan hived up that&rsquo;ll make
- me forget my nationality if stoodiously adhered to. It&rsquo;s needless to
- observe that I accompanies the beady-eyed padre without a struggle. An&rsquo; I
- admits, free an&rsquo; without limitation, that said Valley Tan merits the
- padre&rsquo;s encomiums an&rsquo; fixes me in my fav&rsquo;rite theery that no matter what
- happens, the best happens to the church.
- </p>
- <p>
- As we crosses the little Plaza on our way to Casa Dolores we passes in
- front of the church. Thar on the grass lays the wooden image of the patron
- saint of the Plaza Chaparita. This figger is about four foot long, an&rsquo;
- thar&rsquo;s a hossha&rsquo;r lariat looped onto it where them Mexicans who gets
- malcontent with the saint ropes him off his perch from up in front of the
- church. They&rsquo;ve been haulin&rsquo; the image about an&rsquo; beatin&rsquo; it with cactus
- sticks an&rsquo; all expressive of disdain.
- </p>
- <p>
- I asks the padre why his congregation engages itse&rsquo;f in studied contoomely
- towards the Plaza&rsquo;s saint. He shrugs his shoulders, spreads his hands palm
- out, an&rsquo; says it&rsquo;s because the Plaza&rsquo;s sheep gets sick. I su&rsquo;gests that
- him an&rsquo; me cut in an&rsquo; rescoo the saint; more partic&rsquo;lar since the image is
- all alone, an&rsquo; the outfit that&rsquo;s been beatin&rsquo; him up has abandoned said
- corrections to drink pulque an&rsquo; exercise their moccasins in the <i>baile</i>.
- But the padre shakes his head. He allows it&rsquo;s a heap better to let the
- public fully vent its feelin&rsquo;s. He explains that when the sheep gets well
- the congregation &rsquo;ll round-up the image, give him a reproachful
- talk an&rsquo; a fresh coat of paint, an&rsquo; put him back on his perch. The saint
- &rsquo;ll come winner on the deal all right, the padre says.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Besides,&rdquo; argues the padre, &ldquo;it is onneces-sary for pore blinded mortals
- to come pawin&rsquo; about to protect a saint. These yere images,&rdquo; he insists,
- &ldquo;can look after themse&rsquo;fs. They&rsquo;ll find the way outen their troubles
- whenever they gets ready.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- At that we proceeds for&rsquo;ard to Casa Dolores an&rsquo; the promised Valley Tan,
- an&rsquo; leaves the wooden saint to his meditations on the grass. After all, I
- agrees with the padre. It&rsquo;s the saint&rsquo;s business to ride herd on the
- interests of the Plaza Chaparita; an&rsquo; if he goes to sleep on the lookout&rsquo;s
- stool an&rsquo; takes to neglectin&rsquo; sech plays as them sheep gettin&rsquo; sick,
- whatever is the Greasers goin&rsquo; to do? They&rsquo;re shore bound to express their
- disapproval; an&rsquo; I reckons as good a scheme as any is to caper up, yank
- the careless image outen his niche with a lariat, an&rsquo; lam loose an&rsquo; cavil
- at him with a club.
- </p>
- <p>
- This yere <i>fieste</i> at the Plaza Chaparita is a day an&rsquo; night of
- laughter, dance an&rsquo; mirth. But it ends bad. The padre an&rsquo; me is over to
- the dance-hall followin&rsquo; our investigations touchin&rsquo; the Valley Tan an&rsquo;
- the padre explains to me how he permits to his people a different behavior
- from what&rsquo;s possible among Americanos.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I studies for the church in Baltimore,&rdquo; the padre says, &ldquo;an&rsquo; thar the
- priest must keep a curb on his Americano parishioners. They are not like
- Mexicanos. They&rsquo;re fierce an&rsquo; headlong an&rsquo; go too far. If you let them
- gamble, they gamble too much; if you let them drink, they drink too much.
- The evil of the Americano is that he overplays. It is not so with the
- Mexicano. If the Mexicano gambles, it is only a trifle an&rsquo; for pleasure;
- if he drinks, it is but enough to free a bird&rsquo;s song in his heart. All my
- people drink an&rsquo; dance an&rsquo; gamble; but it&rsquo;s only play, it is never
- earnest. See! in the whole Plaza Chaparita you find no drunkard, no
- pauper; no one is too bad or too good or too rich or too poor or too
- unhappy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then the priest beams on me like he disposes of the question; an&rsquo; since
- I&rsquo;ve jest been drinkin&rsquo; his Valley Tan I don&rsquo;t enter no protests to what
- he states. From what ensoos, however, I should jedge the padre overlooks
- his game in one partic&rsquo;lar.
- </p>
- <p>
- As me an&rsquo; the padre sits gazin&rsquo; on at the dance, a senorita with a dark
- shawl over her head, drifts into the door like a shadow. She&rsquo;s little; an&rsquo;
- by what I sees of her face, she&rsquo;s pretty. As she crosses in front of the
- padre she stops an&rsquo; sort o&rsquo; drops down on one knee with her head bowed.
- The padre blesses her an&rsquo; calls her &ldquo;Chiquita;&rdquo; then she goes on. I don&rsquo;t
- pay no onusual attention; though as me an&rsquo; the padre talks, I notes her
- where she stands with her shawl still over her head in a corner of the
- dance hall.
- </p>
- <p>
- Across from the little Chiquita is a young Greaser an&rsquo; his sweetheart.
- This girl is pretty, too; but her shawl ain&rsquo;t over her head an&rsquo; she an&rsquo;
- her <i>muchacho</i>, from their smiles an&rsquo; love glances, is havin&rsquo; the
- happiest of nights.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It looks like you&rsquo;ll have a weddin&rsquo; on your hands,&rdquo; I says to the padre,
- indicatin&rsquo; where the two is courtin&rsquo;.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Chiquita should not stay here,&rdquo; says the padre talkin&rsquo; to himse&rsquo;f. With
- that he organizes like he&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; over to the little shawled senorita in
- the corner.
- </p>
- <p>
- It strikes me that the padre&rsquo;s remark is a heap irrelevant. But I soon
- sees that he onderstands the topics he tackles a mighty sight better than
- me. The padre&rsquo;s hardly moved when it looks like the senorita Chiquita
- saveys he&rsquo;s out to head her off. With that she crosses the dance-hall
- swift as a cat an&rsquo; flashes a knife into the heart of the laughing girl.
- The next moment the knife is planted in her own.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the old story, so old an&rsquo; common thar&rsquo;s not a new word to be said.
- Two dead girls; love the reason an&rsquo; the jealous knife the trail. Thar&rsquo;s
- not a scream, not a word; that entire <i>baile</i> stands transfixed. As
- the padre raises the little Chi-quita&rsquo;s head, I sees the tears swimmin&rsquo; in
- his eyes. It&rsquo;s the one time I comes nearest thinkin&rsquo; well of a Mexican;
- that padre, at least, is toler&rsquo;ble.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That is a very sad finale&mdash;the death of the girls,&rdquo; observed the
- Sour Gentleman, reaching for the Scotch whiskey as though for comfort&rsquo;s
- sake. &ldquo;And still, the glimpse you gave would move me to a pleasant
- estimate of Mexicans.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why then,&rdquo; returned the Old Cattleman, becoming also an applicant for
- Scotch, &ldquo;considered as abstract prop&rsquo;sitions, Mexicans aint so bad. Which
- they&rsquo;re like Injuns; they improves a lot by distance. An&rsquo; they has their
- strong p&rsquo;ints, too; gratitoode is one. You-all confer a favor on a
- Mexican, an&rsquo; he&rsquo;ll hang on your trail a hundred years but what he&rsquo;ll do
- you a favor in return. An&rsquo; he&rsquo;ll jest about pay ten for one at that.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Speakin&rsquo; of gratitoode, Sioux Sam yere tells a story to &rsquo;llustrate
- how good deeds is bound to meet their reward. It&rsquo;s what the squaws tells
- the papooses to make &rsquo;em kind.&rdquo; Then to Sioux Sam: &ldquo;Give us the
- tale of Strongarm an&rsquo; the Big Medicine Elk. The talk is up to you.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Sioux Sam was in no sort diffident, and readily told us the following:
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0010" id="link2HCH0010"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER X.&mdash;HOW STRONGARM WAS AN ELK.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">M</span>oh-Kwa was the
- wisest of all the beasts along the Upper Yellowstone; an&rsquo; yet Moh-Kwa
- could not catch a fish. This made Moh-Kwa have a bad heart, for next to
- honey he liked fish. What made it worse was that in Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s cavern where
- he lived, there lay a deep pool which was the camp of many fish; an&rsquo;
- Moh-Kwa would sit an&rsquo; look at them an&rsquo; long for them, while the fish came
- close to the edge an&rsquo; laughed at Moh-Kwa, for they knew beneath their
- scales that he could not catch them; an&rsquo; the laughter of the fish made a
- noise like swift water running among rocks. Sometimes Moh-Kwa struck at a
- fish with his big paw, but the fish never failed to dive out of reach; an&rsquo;
- this made the other fish laugh at Moh-Kwa more than before. Once Moh-Kwa
- got so angry he plunged into the pool to hunt the fish; but it only made
- him seem foolish, for the fish swam about him in flashing circles, an&rsquo;
- dived under him an&rsquo; jumped over him, laughing all the time, making a play
- an&rsquo; a sport of Moh-Kwa. At last he gave up an&rsquo; swam ashore; an&rsquo; then he
- had to sit by his fire an&rsquo; comb his fur all day to dry himself so that he
- might feel like the same bear again.
- </p>
- <p>
- One morning down by the Yellowstone, Moh-Kwa met Strongarm, the young
- Sioux, an&rsquo; Strongarm had a buffalo fish which he had speared in the river.
- An&rsquo; because Moh-Kwa looked at the fish hungrily an&rsquo; with water in his
- mouth, Strongarm gave him the buffalo fish. Also he asked Moh-Kwa why he
- did not catch fish since he liked them so well an&rsquo; the pool in his cavern
- was the camp of many fish. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa said it was because the fish were
- cowards an&rsquo; would not stay an&rsquo; fight with him, but ran away.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;They are not so brave as the bees,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;for when I find a
- bee-tree, they make me fight for the honey. The bees have big hearts
- though little knives, but the fish have no hearts an&rsquo; run like water down
- hill if they but see Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s shadow from his fire fall across the pool.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Strongarm said he would catch the fish for Moh-Kwa; an&rsquo; with that he went
- to the Wise Bear&rsquo;s house an&rsquo; with his spear took many fish, being plenty
- to feed Moh-Kwa two days. Moh-Kwa was very thankful, an&rsquo; because
- Strong-arm liked the Wise Bear, he came four times each moon an&rsquo; speared
- fish for Moh-Kwa who was never so well fed with fish before.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strongarm was a mighty hunter among the Sioux an&rsquo; killed more elk than did
- the ten best hunters of his village. So many elk did Strong-arm slay that
- his squaw, the Blossom, made for their little son, Feather-foot, a
- buckskin coat on which was sewed the eye-teeth of elk, two for each elk,
- until there were so many eye-teeth on Feather-foot&rsquo;s buckskin coat it was
- like counting the leaves on a cottonwood to find how many there were. An&rsquo;
- the Blossom was proud of Feather-foot&rsquo;s coat, for none among the Sioux had
- so beautiful a garment an&rsquo; the eye-teeth of the elk told how big a hunter
- was Strongarm.
- </p>
- <p>
- While the Sioux wondered an&rsquo; admired at the elk-tooth coat, it made the
- Big Medicine Elk, who was chief of the Elk people, hot an&rsquo; angry, an&rsquo;
- turned his heart black against Strongarm. The Big Medicine Elk said he
- would have revenge.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus it happened one day that when Strong-arm stepped from his lodge, he
- saw standing in front a great Elk who had antlers like the branches of a
- tree. An&rsquo; the great Elk stamped his foot an&rsquo; snorted at Strongarm. Then
- Strongarm took his bow an&rsquo; his lance an&rsquo; his knife an&rsquo; hunted the great
- Elk to kill him; but the great Elk ran always a little ahead just out of
- reach.
- </p>
- <p>
- At last the great Elk ran into the Pouch canyon an&rsquo; then Strongarm took
- hope into his heart like a man takes air into his mouth, for the sides of
- the Pouch canyon were high an&rsquo; steep an&rsquo; it ended with a high wall, an&rsquo;
- nothing save a bird might get out again once it went in; for the Pouch
- canyon was a trap which the Great Spirit had set when the world was new.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strongarm was happy in his breast as he followed the great Elk into the
- Pouch canyon for now he was sure. An&rsquo; he thought how the big eye-teeth of
- so great an Elk would look on the collar of Feather-foot&rsquo;s buckskin coat.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Strongarm came to the upper end of the Pouch canyon, there the great
- Elk stood waiting.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Hold!&rdquo; said the great Elk, when Strongarm put an arrow on his bowstring.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0009" id="linkimage-0009"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0157.jpg" alt="0157 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0157.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- But Strongarm shot the arrow which bounded off the great Elk&rsquo;s hide an&rsquo;
- made no wound. Then Strongarm ran against the great Elk with his lance,
- but the lance was broken as though the great Elk was a rock. Then
- Strongarm drew his knife, but when he went close to the great Elk, the
- beast threw him down with his antlers an&rsquo; put his forefoot on Strongarm
- an&rsquo; held him on the ground.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Listen,&rdquo; said the great Elk, an&rsquo; Strongarm listened because he couldn&rsquo;t
- help it. &ldquo;You have hunted my people far an&rsquo; near; an&rsquo; you can never get
- enough of their blood or their eye-teeth. I am the Big Medicine Elk an&rsquo;
- chief of the Elk people; an&rsquo; now for a vengeance against you, I shall
- change you from the hunter to the hunted, an&rsquo; you shall know how good it
- is to have fear an&rsquo; be an elk.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As the great Elk said this, Strongarm felt his head turn heavy with
- antlers, while his nose grew long an&rsquo; his mouth wide, an&rsquo; hair grew out of
- his skin like grass in the moon of new grass, an&rsquo; his hands an&rsquo; feet split
- into hoofs; an&rsquo; then Strong-arm stood on his four new hoofs an&rsquo; saw by his
- picture in the stream that he was an elk. Also the elk-fear curled up in
- his heart to keep him ever in alarm; an&rsquo; he snuffed the air an&rsquo; walked
- about timidly where before he was Strongarm and feared nothing.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strongarm crept home to his lodge, but the Blossom did not know her
- husband; an&rsquo; Feather-foot, his little son, shot arrows at him; an&rsquo; as he
- ran from them, the hunters of his village came forth an&rsquo; chased him until
- Strongarm ran into the darkness of the next night as it came trailing up
- from the East, an&rsquo; the darkness was kind an&rsquo; covered him like a blanket
- an&rsquo; Strongarm was hid by it an&rsquo; saved.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Strongarm did not come with the next sun to spear fish for Moh-Kwa,
- the Wise Bear went to Strongarm&rsquo;s lodge to seek him for he thought that he
- was sick. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa asked the Blossom where was Strongarm? An&rsquo; the
- Blossom said she did not know; that Strongarm chased the great Elk into
- the Pouch canyon an&rsquo; never came out again; an&rsquo; now a big Doubt had spread
- its blankets in her heart an&rsquo; would not leave, but was making a long camp,
- saying she was a widow. Then the Blossom wept; but Moh-Kwa told her to
- wait an&rsquo; he would see, because he, Moh-Kwa, owed Strongarm for many fish
- an&rsquo; would now pay him.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa went to the Big Medicine Elk.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Where is the Strongarm?&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He runs in the hills an&rsquo; is an elk,&rdquo; said the Big Medicine Elk. &ldquo;He
- killed my people for their teeth, an&rsquo; a great fright was on all my people
- because of the Strongarm. The mothers dare not go down to the river&rsquo;s edge
- to drink, an&rsquo; their children had no time to grow fat for they were ever
- looking to meet the Strongarm. Now he is an elk an&rsquo; my people will have
- peace; the mothers will drink an&rsquo; their babies be fat an&rsquo; big, being no
- more chased by the Strongarm.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Moh-Kwa thought an&rsquo; thought, an&rsquo; at last he said to the Big Medicine
- Elk:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That is all proud talk. But I must have the Strongarm back, for he
- catches my fish.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But the Big Medicine Elk said he would not give Moh-Kwa back the
- Strongarm.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why should I?&rdquo; asked the Big Medicine Elk. &ldquo;Did not I save you in the
- Yellowstone,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;when as you swam the river a drifting tree
- caught in your antlers an&rsquo; held down your head to drown you? An&rsquo; did you
- not bawl to me who searched for berries on the bank; an&rsquo; did I not swim to
- you an&rsquo; save you from the tree?&rdquo; Still the Big Medicine Elk shook his
- antlers.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What you say is of another day. You saved me an&rsquo; that is ended. I will
- not give you back the Strongarm for that. One does not drink the water
- that is gone by.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa then grew so angry his eyes burned red like fire, an&rsquo; he
- threatened to kill the Big-Medicine Elk. But the Big Medicine Elk laughed
- like the fish laughed, for he said he could not be killed by any who lived
- on the land.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Then we will go to the water,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa; an&rsquo; with that he took the
- Big Medicine Elk in his great hairy arms an&rsquo; carried him kicking an&rsquo;
- struggling to the Yellowstone; for Moh-Kwa could hold the Big Medicine Elk
- though he could not hurt him.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa had carried the Big Medicine Elk to the river, he sat down on
- the bank an&rsquo; waited with the Big Medicine Elk in his arms until a tree
- came floating down. Then Moh-Kwa swam with the Big Medicine Elk to the
- tree an&rsquo; tangled the branches in the antlers of the Big Medicine Elk so
- that he was fast with his nose under the water an&rsquo; was sure to drown.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now you are as you were when I helped you,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa.
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; the Catfish people in the river came with joy an&rsquo; bit the legs of the
- Big Medicine Elk, an&rsquo; said, &ldquo;Thank you, Moh-Kwa; you do well to bring us
- food now an&rsquo; then since you eat so many fish.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As Moh-Kwa turned to swim again to the bank, he said over his shoulder to
- the Big Medicine Elk:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now you may sing your death song, for Pauguk, the Death, is in the river
- with you an&rsquo; those are Pauguk&rsquo;s catfish which gnaw your legs.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- At this the Big Medicine Elk said between his cries of grief an&rsquo; fear that
- if Moh-Kwa would save him out of the river, he would tell him how to have
- the Strongarm back. So Moh-Kwa went again an&rsquo; freed the Big Medicine Elk
- from the tree an&rsquo; carried him to the bank, while the Catfish people
- followed, angrily crying:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Is this fair, Moh-Kwa? Do you give an&rsquo; then do you take away? Moh-Kwa!
- you are a Pawnee!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Big Medicine Elk had got his breath an&rsquo; wiped the tears from his
- eyes, he told Moh-Kwa that the only way to bring the Strongarm back to be
- a hunter from being one of the hunted was for Feather-foot, his son, to
- cut his throat; an&rsquo; for the Blossom, his squaw, to burn his elk-body with
- cedar boughs.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; why his son, the Feather-foot?&rdquo; asked Moh-Kwa.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Because the Feather-foot owes the Strongarm a life,&rdquo; replied the Big
- Medicine Elk. &ldquo;Is not Strongarm the Feather-foot&rsquo;s father an&rsquo; does not the
- son owe the father his life?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa saw this was true talk, so he let the Big Medicine Elk go free.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I will even promise that the Strongarm,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, as the two parted,
- &ldquo;when again he is a Sioux on two legs, shall never hunt the Elk people.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But the Big Medicine Elk, who was licking his fetlocks where the Catfish
- people had hurt the skin, shook his antlers an&rsquo; replied:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is not needed. The Strongarm has been one of the Elk people an&rsquo; will
- feel he is their brother an&rsquo; will not hurt them.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa found it a hard task to capture Strongarm when now he was an elk
- with the elk-fear in his heart. For Strongarm had already learned the
- elk&rsquo;s warning which is taught by all the Elk people, an&rsquo; which says:
- </p>
- <p>
- <br />
- </p>
- <p class="indent15">
- Look up for danger and look down for gain;
- </p>
- <p class="indent15">
- Believe no wolf&rsquo;s word, and avoid the plain.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br />
- </p>
- <p>
- Strongarm would look down for the grass with one eye, while he kept an eye
- up among the branches or along the sides of the canyon for fear of
- mountain lions. An&rsquo; he stuck close in among the hills, an&rsquo; would not go
- out on the plains where the wolves lived; an&rsquo; he wouldn&rsquo;t talk with a wolf
- or listen to his words.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Strongarm, while he ran an&rsquo; hid from Moh-Kwa and the others, was not
- afraid of the Blossom, who was his squaw, but would come to her gladly if
- he might find her alone among the trees.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is not the first time,&rdquo; said the Wise Bear, &ldquo;that the hunter has made
- his trap of love.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- With that he told the Blossom to go into the hills an&rsquo; call Strongarm to
- her with her love. Then she was to bind his feet so that he might not get
- away an&rsquo; run.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Blossom called Strongarm an&rsquo; he came; but he was fearful an&rsquo;
- suspicious an&rsquo; his nose an&rsquo; his ears an&rsquo; his eyes kept guard until the
- Blossom put her hand on his neck; an&rsquo; then Strongarm&rsquo;s great love for the
- Blossom smothered out his caution as one might smother a fire with a robe;
- an&rsquo; the Blossom tied all his feet with thongs an&rsquo; bound his eyes with her
- blanket so that Strongarm might not see an&rsquo; be afraid.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then came Feather-foot, gladly, an&rsquo; cut Strong-arm&rsquo;s throat with his
- knife; for Feather-foot did not know he killed his father&mdash;for that
- was a secret thing with Moh-Kwa an&rsquo; the Blossom&mdash;an&rsquo; thought only how
- he killed a great Elk.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Strongarm was dead, Moh-Kwa toiled throughout the day carrying up the
- big cedar; an&rsquo; when a pile like a hill was made, Moh-Kwa put Strongarm&rsquo;s
- elk-body on its top, an&rsquo; brought fire from his house in the rocks, an&rsquo;
- made a great burning.
- </p>
- <p>
- In the morning, the Blossom who had stayed with Moh-Kwa through the night
- while the fire burned, said, &ldquo;Now, although the big elk is gone into
- ashes, I do not yet see the Strongarm.&rdquo; But Moh-Kwa said, &ldquo;You will find
- him asleep in the lodge.&rdquo; An&rsquo; that was a true word, for when Moh-Kwa an&rsquo;
- the Blossom went to the lodge, there they found Strongarm whole an&rsquo; good
- an&rsquo; as sound asleep as a tree at midnight.
- </p>
- <p>
- Outside the lodge they met the little Feather-foot who cried, &ldquo;Where is
- the big elk, Moh-Kwa, that I killed?&rdquo; An&rsquo; the Blossom showed him his
- father, Strongarm, where he slept, an&rsquo; said, &ldquo;There is your big elk,
- Feather-foot; an&rsquo; this will ever be your best hunting for it found you
- your father again.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa saw that everything was settled an&rsquo; well, an&rsquo; that he would
- now have always his regular fish, he wiped the sweat out of his eyes with
- his paws which were all singed fur an&rsquo; ashes, an&rsquo; said, &ldquo;I am the weariest
- bear along the whole length of the Yellowstone, for I carried some heavy
- trees an&rsquo; have worked hard. Now I will sleep an&rsquo; rest.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; with that Moh-Kwa lay down an&rsquo; snored an&rsquo; slept four days; then he
- arose an&rsquo; eat up the countless fish which Strongarm had speared to be
- ready for him. This done, Moh-Kwa lighted his pipe of kinnikinick, an&rsquo;
- softly rubbing his stomach where the fish were, said: &ldquo;Fish give Moh-Kwa a
- good heart.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now that is what I call a pretty story,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is that,&rdquo; observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, with emphasis. &ldquo;And I&rsquo;ve
- no doubt the Strongarm made it a point thereafter to be careful as to what
- game he hunted. But, leaving fable for fact, my friend,&rdquo;&mdash;the Red
- Nosed Gentleman addressed now the Sour Gentleman&mdash;&ldquo;would you not call
- it your turn to uplift the spirits of this company? We have just enough
- time and I just enough burgundy for one more story before we go to bed.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;While our friend, the Sioux Gentleman,&rdquo; responded the Sour Gentleman,
- &ldquo;was unfolding his interesting fable, my thoughts&mdash;albeit I listened
- to him and lost never a word&mdash;were to the rear with the old days
- which came on the back of that catastrophe of tobacco. They come to me
- most clearly as I sit here smoking and listening, and with your permission
- I&rsquo;ll relate the story of The Smuggled Silk.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0011" id="link2HCH0011"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XI.&mdash;THAT SMUGGLED SILK.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">S</span>hould your
- curiosity invite it, and the more since I promised you the story, we will
- now, my friends, go about the telling of that one operation in underground
- silk. It is not calculated to foster the pride of an old man to plunge
- into a relation of dubious doings of his youth. And yet, as I look
- backward on that one bit of smuggling of which I was guilty, so far as
- motive was involved, I exonerate myself. I looked on the government,
- because of the South&rsquo;s conquest by the North, and that later ruin of
- myself through the machinations of the Revenue office, as both a political
- and a personal foe. And I felt, not alone morally free, but was impelled
- besides in what I deemed a spirit of justice to myself, to wage war
- against it as best I might. It was on such argument, where the chance
- proffered, that I sought wealth as a smuggler. I would deplete the
- government&mdash;forage, as it were, on the enemy&mdash;thereby to fatten
- my purse.
- </p>
- <p>
- As my hair has whitened with the sifting frosts of years, I confess that
- my sophistries of smuggling seem less and less plausible, while smuggling
- itself loses whatever of romantic glamour it may once have been invested
- with, or what little color of respect to which it might seem able to lay
- claim. This tale shall be told in simplest periods. That is as should be;
- for expression should ever be meek and subjugated when one&rsquo;s story is the
- mere story of a cheat. There is scant room in such recital for heroic
- phrase. Smuggling, and paint it with what genius one may, can be nothing
- save a skulking, hiding, fear-eaten trade. There is nothing about it of
- bravery or dash. How therefore and avoid laughter, may one wax stately in
- any telling of its ignoble details?
- </p>
- <p>
- When, following my unfortunate crash in tobacco, I had cleared away the
- last fragment of the confusion that reigned in my affairs, I was driven to
- give my nerves a respite and seek a rest. For three months I had been
- under severest stress. When the funeral was done&mdash;for funeral it
- seemed to me&mdash;and my tobacco enterprise and those hopes it had so
- flattered were forever laid at rest, my soul sank exhausted and my brain
- was in a whirl. I could neither think with clearness nor plan with
- accuracy. Moreover, I was prey to that depression and lack of confidence
- in myself, which come inevitably as the corollary of utter weariness.
- </p>
- <p>
- Aware of this personal condition, I put aside thought of any present
- formulation of a future. I would rest, recover poise, and win back that
- optimism that belongs with health and youth.
- </p>
- <p>
- This was wisdom; I was jaded beyond belief; and fatigue means dejection,
- and dejection spells pessimism, and pessimism is never sagacious nor
- excellent in any of its programmes.
- </p>
- <p>
- For that rawness of the nerves I speak of, many apply themselves to drink;
- some rush to drugs; for myself, I take to music. It was midwinter, and
- grand opera was here. This was fortunate. I buried myself in a box, and
- opened my very pores to those nerve-healthful harmonies.
- </p>
- <p>
- In a week thereafter I might call myself recovered. My soul was cool, my
- eye bright, my mind clear and sensibly elate. Life and its promises seemed
- mightily refreshed.
- </p>
- <p>
- No one has ever called me superstitious and yet to begin my
- course-charting for a new career, I harked back to the old Astor House. It
- was there that brilliant thought of tobacco overtook me two years before.
- Perhaps an inspiration was to dwell in an environment. Again I registered,
- and finding it tenantless, took over again my old room. Still I cannot
- say, and it is to that hostelry&rsquo;s credit, that my domicile at the Astor
- aided me to my smuggling resolves. Those last had growth somewhat in this
- fashion:
- </p>
- <p>
- I had dawdled for two hours over coffee in the café&mdash;the room and the
- employment which had one-time brought me fortune&mdash;but was incapable
- of any thought of value. I could decide on nothing good. Indeed, I did
- naught save mentally curse those revenue miscreants who, failing of
- blackmail, had destroyed me for revenge.
- </p>
- <p>
- Whatever comfort may lurk in curses, at least they carry no money profit;
- so after a fruitless session over coffee and maledictions, I arose, and as
- a calmative, walked down Broadway.
- </p>
- <p>
- At Trinity churchyard, the gates being open, I turned in and began
- ramblingly to twine and twist among the graves. There I encountered a
- garrulous old man who, for his own pleasure, evidently, devoted himself to
- my information. He pointed out the grave of Fulton, he of the steamboats;
- then I was shown the tomb of that Lawrence who would &ldquo;never give up the
- ship;&rdquo; from there I was carried to the last low bed of the love-wrecked
- Charlotte Temple.
- </p>
- <p>
- My eye at last, by the alluring voice and finger of the old guide, was
- drawn to a spot under the tower where sleeps the Lady Cornbury, dead now
- as I tell this, hardby two hundred years. Also I was told of that Lord
- Cornbury, her husband, once governor of the colony for his relative, Queen
- Anne; and how he became so much more efficient as a smuggler and a customs
- cheat, than ever he was as an executive, that he lost his high employ.
- </p>
- <p>
- Because I had nothing more worthy to occupy my leisure, I listened&mdash;somewhat
- listlessly, I promise you, for after all I was thinking on the future, not
- the past, and considering of the living rather than those old dead folk,
- obscure, forgotten in their slim graves&mdash;I listened, I say, to my
- gray historian; and somehow, after I was free of him, the one thing that
- remained alive in my memory was the smuggling story of our Viscount
- Cornbury.
- </p>
- <p>
- Among those few acquaintances I formed during my brief prosperity, was one
- with a gentleman named Harris, who owned apartments under mine on
- Twenty-second Street. Harris was elegant, educated, traveled, and
- apparently well-to-do of riches. Busy with my own mounting fortunes, the
- questions of who Harris was? and what he did? and how he lived? never
- rapped at the door of my curiosity for reply.
- </p>
- <p>
- One night, however, as we sat over a late and by no means a first bottle
- of wine, Harris himself informed me that he was employed in smuggling; had
- a partner-accomplice in the Customs House, and perfect arrangements aboard
- a certain ship. By these last double advantages, he came aboard with
- twenty trunks, if he so pleased, without risking anything from the
- inquisitiveness or loquacity of the officers of the ship; and later
- debarked at New York with the certainty of going scatheless through the
- customs as rapidly as his Inspector partner could chalk scrawlingly &ldquo;O.
- K.&rdquo; upon his sundry pieces of baggage.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coming from Old Trinity, still mooting Corn-bury and his smugglings, my
- thoughts turned to Harris. Also, for the earliest time, I began to
- consider within myself whether smuggling was not a field of business
- wherein a pushing man might grow and reap a harvest. The idea came to me
- to turn &ldquo;free-trader.&rdquo; The government had destroyed me; I would make
- reprisal. I would give my hand to smuggling and spoil the Egyptian.
- </p>
- <p>
- At once I sought Harris and over a glass of champagne&mdash;ever a
- favorite wine with me&mdash;we struck agreement. As a finale we each put
- in fifteen thousand dollars, and with the whole sum of thirty thousand
- dollars Harris pushed forth for Europe while I remained behind. Harris
- visited Lyons; and our complete investment was in a choicest sort of Lyons
- silk. The rich fabrics were packed in a dozen trunks&mdash;not all alike,
- those trunks, but differing, one from another, so as to prevent the notion
- as they stood about the wharf that there was aught of relationship between
- them or that one man stood owner of them all.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is not needed to tell of my partner&rsquo;s voyage of return. It was without
- event and one may safely abandon it, leaving its relation to Harris
- himself, if he be yet alive and should the spirit him so move. It is
- enough for the present purpose that in due time the trunks holding our
- precious silk-bolts, with Harris as their convoy, arrived safe in New
- York.
- </p>
- <p>
- I had been looking for the boat&rsquo;s coming and was waiting on the wharf as
- her lines and her stagings were run ashore.
- </p>
- <p>
- Our partner, the Inspector, and who was to enjoy a per cent, of the
- profits of the speculation, was named Lorns. He rapidly chalked &ldquo;O. K.&rdquo;
- with his name affixed to the end of each several trunk and it thereupon
- with the balance of inspected baggage was promptly piled upon the wharf.
- </p>
- <p>
- There had been a demand for drays, I remember, and on this day when our
- silks came in, I was able to procure but one. The ship did not dock until
- late in the afternoon, and at eight o&rsquo;clock of a dark, foggy April
- evening, there still remained one of our trunks&mdash;the largest of all,
- it was&mdash;on the wharf. The dray had departed with the second load for
- that concealing loft in Reade Street which, during Harris&rsquo; absence, I had
- taken to be used as the depot of those smuggling operations wherein we
- might become engaged. I had made every move with caution; I had never
- employed our real names not even with the drayman.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I tell you, the dray was engaged about the second trip. This last large
- silk-trunk was left behind perforce; pile it how one might there had been
- no safe room for it on the already overloaded dray. The drayman promised
- to return and have it safely in our loft that night.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myself, I was from first to last lounging about the wharf, overseeing
- the going away of our goods. Harris, so soon as I gave him key and
- street-number, had posted to Reade Street to attend the silk&rsquo;s reception.
- </p>
- <p>
- Waiting for the coming back of the conveying dray proved but a slow, dull
- business, and I was impatiently, at the hour I&rsquo;ve named, walking up and
- down, casting an occasional glance at the big last trunk where it stood on
- end, a bit drawn out and separated from the common mountain of baggage
- wherewith the wharf was piled.
- </p>
- <p>
- One of the general inspectors, a man I had never seen but whom I knew, by
- virtue of his rank, to be superior to our chalk-wielding coparcener, also
- paced the wharf and appeared to bear me company in a distant,
- non-communicative way. This customs captain and myself, save for an under
- inspector named Quin, had the dock to ourselves. The boat was long in and
- most land folk had gotten through their concern with her and wended
- homeward long before. There were, however, many passengers of emigrant
- sort still held aboard the ship.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I marched up and down, Lorns came ashore and pretended some business
- with his superior officer. As he returned to the ship and what duties he
- had still to perform there, he made a slight signal to both myself and his
- fellow inspector, Quin, to follow him. I was well known to Lorns, having
- had several talks with him, while Harris was abroad. Quin I had never met;
- but it quickly appeared that he was a confidant of Lorns, and while
- without money interest in our affairs was ready to bear helping hand
- should the situation commence to pinch.
- </p>
- <p>
- Quin and I went severally and withal carelessly aboard ship, and not at
- all as though we were seeking Lorns. This was to darken the chief, whom we
- both surmised to be the cause of Lorn&rsquo;s signal.
- </p>
- <p>
- Once aboard and gathered in a dark corner, Lorns began at once:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Let me do the talking,&rdquo; said Lorns with a nervous rapidity that at once
- enlisted the ears of Quin and myself. &ldquo;Don&rsquo;t interrupt, but listen. The
- chief suspects that last trunk. I can tell it by the way he acts. A bit
- later, when I come ashore, he&rsquo;ll ask to have it opened. Should he do so,
- we&rsquo;re lost; you and I.&rdquo; This last was to me. Then to Quin: &ldquo;Do you see
- that long, bony Swiss, with the boots and porcelain pipe? He&rsquo;s in an ugly
- mood, doesn&rsquo;t speak English, and within one minute after you return to the
- wharf, he and I will be entangled in a rough and tumble riot. I&rsquo;ll attend
- to that. The row will be prodigious. The chief will be sent for to settle
- the war, and when he leaves the wharf, Quin, don&rsquo;t wait; seize on that
- silk trunk and throw it into the river. There&rsquo;s iron enough clamped about
- the corners to sink it; besides, it&rsquo;s packed so tightly it&rsquo;s as heavy as
- lead, and will go to the bottom like an anvil. Then from the pile pull
- down some trunk similar to it in looks and stand it in its place. It&rsquo;ll go
- in the dark. Give the new trunk my mark, as the chief has already read the
- name on the trunk. Go, Quin; I rely on you.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You can trust me, my boy,&rdquo; retorted Quin, cheerfully, and turning on his
- heel, he was back on the wharf in a moment, and apparently busy about the
- pile of baggage.
- </p>
- <p>
- Suddenly there came a mighty uproar aboard ship. Lorns and the Swiss, the
- latter already irate over some trouble he had experienced, were rolling
- about the deck in a most violent scrimmage, the Swiss having decidedly the
- worst of the trouble. The chief rushed up the plank; Lorns and the
- descendant of Tell and Winkelried, were torn apart; and then a double din
- of explanation ensued. After ten minutes, the chief was able to straighten
- out the difficulty&mdash;whatever its pretended cause might be I know not;
- for I held myself warily aloof, not a little alarmed by what Lorns had
- communicated&mdash;and repaired again to his station upon the wharf.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the chief came down the plank, Quin, who had not been a moment behind
- him in going aboard to discover the reasons of the riot, followed. Brief
- as was that moment, however, during which Quin had lingered behind, he had
- made the shift suggested by Lorns; the silk trunk was under the river, a
- strange trunk stood in its stead.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the chief returned, he walked straight to this suspected trunk and
- tipped it down with his foot. Then to Quin:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Ask Lorns to step <i>here</i>.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Quin went questing Lorns; shortly Lorns and Quin came back together. The
- chief turned in a brisk, sharp, official way to Lorns:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Did you inspect this trunk?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I did,&rdquo; said Lorns, looking at the chalk marks as if to make sure.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Open it!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- No keys were procurable; the owners, Lorns said, had long since left the
- docks. But Lorns suggested that he get hammer and cold-chisel from the
- ship.
- </p>
- <p>
- The trunk was opened and found free and innocent of aught contraband. The
- chief wore a puzzled, dark look; he felt that he&rsquo;d been cheated, but he
- couldn&rsquo;t say how. Therefore, being wise, the chief gulped, said nothing,
- and as life is short and he had many things to do, soon after left the
- docks and went his way.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That was a squeak!&rdquo; said Lorns when we were at last free of the dangerous
- chief. &ldquo;Quin, I thank you.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s all right,&rdquo; retorted Quin, with a grin; &ldquo;do as much for me some
- time.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That night, with the aid of a river pirate, our trunk, jettisoned by the
- excellent Quin, was fished up; and being tight as a drum, its contents had
- come to little harm with the baptism. At last, our dozen silk trunks&mdash;holding
- a treasure of thirty thousand dollars and whereon we looked to clear a
- heavy profit&mdash;were safe in the Reade Street loft; and my hasty heart,
- which had been beating at double speed since that almost fatal
- interference, slowed to normal.
- </p>
- <p>
- One might now suppose our woes were at an end, all danger over, and
- nothing to do but dispose of that shimmering cargo to best advantage.
- Harris and I were of that spirit-lifting view; we began on the very next
- day to feel about for customers.
- </p>
- <p>
- Harris, whose former smuggling exploits had dealt solely with gems, knew
- as little of silk as did I. Had either been expert he might have foreseen
- a coming peril into whose arms we in our blindness all but walked. No, our
- troubles were not yet done. We had escaped the engulfing suck of
- Charybdis, only to be darted upon by those six grim mouths of her sister
- monster, Scylla, over the way.
- </p>
- <p>
- Well do I recall that morning. I had seen but two possible purchasers of
- silks when Harris overtook me. His eye shone with alarm. Lorns had run him
- down with the news&mdash;however he himself discovered it, I never knew&mdash;that
- another danger yawned.
- </p>
- <p>
- Harris hurried me to our Reade Street lair and gave particulars.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It seems,&rdquo; said Harris, quite out of breath with the speed we&rsquo;d made in
- hunting cover, &ldquo;that Stewart is for America the sole agent of these
- particular brands of silk which we&rsquo;ve brought in. Some one to whom we&rsquo;ve
- offered them has notified the Stewart company. At this moment and as we
- sit here, the detectives belonging to Stewart, and for all I may guess,
- the whole Central Office as well, are on our track. They want to discover
- who has these silks; and how they came in, since the customs records show
- no such importations. And there&rsquo;s a dark characteristic to these silks.
- Each bolt has its peculiar, individual selvage. Each, with a sample of its
- selvage, is registered at the home looms. Could anyone get a snip of a
- selvage he could return with it to Lyons, learn from the manufacturers&rsquo;
- book just when it was woven, when sold, and to whom. I can tell you one
- thing,&rdquo; observed Harris, as he concluded his story, &ldquo;we&rsquo;re in a bad
- corner.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- How the cold drops spangled my brows! I began to wish with much heart that
- I&rsquo;d never met Harris, nor heard, that Trinity churchyard day, of Cornbury
- and his smuggling methods of gathering gold.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was one ray of hope; neither Harris nor I had disclosed our names,
- nor the whereabouts or quantity of the silks; and as each had been dealing
- with folk with whom he&rsquo;d never before met, we were both as yet mysteries
- unsolved.
- </p>
- <p>
- Nor were we ever solved. Harris and I kept off the streets during daylight
- hours for a full month. We were not utterly idle; we unpleasantly employed
- ourselves in trimming away that telltale selvage.
- </p>
- <p>
- Preferring safety to profit, we put forth no efforts to realize on our
- speculations for almost a year. By that time the one day&rsquo;s wonder of
- &ldquo;Who&rsquo;s got Stewart&rsquo;s silks?&rdquo; had ceased to disturb the mercantile world
- and the grand procession of dry goods interest passed on and over it.
- </p>
- <p>
- At last we crept forth like felons&mdash;as, good sooth! we were&mdash;and
- disposed of our mutilated silks to certain good folk whose forefathers
- once ruled Palestine. These gentry liked bargains, and were in no wise
- curious; they bought our wares without lifting an eyebrow of inquiry, and
- from them constructed&mdash;though with that I had no concern&mdash;those
- long &ldquo;circulars,&rdquo; so called, which were the feminine joy a third of a
- century gone.
- </p>
- <p>
- As to Harris and myself; what with delays, what with expenses, what with
- figures reduced to dispose of our plunder, we got evenly out. We got back
- our money; but for those fear-shaken hours of two separate perils, we were
- never paid.
- </p>
- <p>
- I smuggled no more. Still, I did not relinquish my pious purpose to
- despoil that public treasury Egyptian quoted heretofore. Neither did I
- give up the Customs as a rich field of illicit endeavor. But my methods
- changed. I now decided that I, myself, would become an Inspector, like
- unto the useful Lorns, and make my fortune from the opulent inside. I
- procured the coveted appointment, for I could bring power to bear, and
- later I&rsquo;ll tell you of The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- When I was in my room that night, making ready for bed, I could still hear
- the soft, cold fingers of the snow upon the pane. What a storm was that!
- Our landlord who had been boy and man and was now gray in that old inn,
- declared how he had never witnessed the smothering fellow to it.
- </p>
- <p>
- The following day, while still and bright and no snow to fall, showed a
- temperature below zero. The white blockade still held us fast, and now the
- desperate cold was come to be the ally of the snow. Departure was never a
- question.
- </p>
- <p>
- As we kicked the logs into a cheerful uproar of sparks, and drew that
- evening about the great fireplace, it was the Old Cattleman to break
- conversational ground.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Do you-all know,&rdquo; said he, &ldquo;I shore feels that idle this evenin&rsquo; it&rsquo;s
- worse&rsquo;n scand&rsquo;lous&mdash;it&rsquo;s reedic&rsquo;lous.&rdquo; Here he threw himself back in
- his armchair and yawned. &ldquo;Pardon these yere demonstrations of weariness,
- gents,&rdquo; he observed; &ldquo;they ain&rsquo;t aimed at you none. That&rsquo;s the fact,
- though; this amazin&rsquo; sensation of bein&rsquo; held a prisoner is beginnin&rsquo; to
- gnaw at me a heap. Talk of &lsquo;a painted ship upon a painted ocean,&rsquo; like
- that poem sharp wrote of! Why that vessel&rsquo;s sedyoolously employed compared
- to us!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You should recall,&rdquo; remarked the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;how somewhere it is said
- that whatever your hand finds to do, you should do it with all your heart.
- Now, I would say the counsel applies to our present position. Since we
- must needs be idle, let us be idle heartily and happily, and get every
- good to lie hidden in what to me, at least, is a most pleasant
- companionship.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I shore unites with you,&rdquo; responded the Old Cattleman, &ldquo;in them
- script&rsquo;ral exhortations to do things with all your heart. It was Wild Bill
- Hickox&rsquo;s way, too; an&rsquo; a Christian adherence to that commandment, not only
- saves Bill&rsquo;s life, but endows him with the record for single-handed
- killin&rsquo;s so far as we-all has accounts.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Is it a story?&rdquo; asked the Red Nosed Gentleman. &ldquo;Once in a while I relish
- a good blood and thunder tale.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s this a-way,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;Bill&rsquo;s hand is forced by the
- Jake McCandlas gang. Bill has &rsquo;em to do; an&rsquo; rememberin&rsquo;,
- doubtless, the Bible lessons of his old mother back in Illinois, he shore
- does &rsquo;em with all his heart, as the good book says. This yere is
- the story of &lsquo;The Wiping Out of McCandlas.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0012" id="link2HCH0012"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XII.&mdash;THE WIPING OUT OF McCANDLAS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>ell you-all a tale
- of blood? It shore irritates me a heap, gents, when you eastern folks
- looks allers to the west for stories red an&rsquo; drippin&rsquo; with murder. Which
- mighty likely now the west is plenty peaceful compared with this yere east
- itse&rsquo;f. Thar&rsquo;s one thing you can put in your mem&rsquo;randum book for footure
- ref&rsquo;rence, an&rsquo; that is, for all them years I inhabits Arizona an&rsquo; Texas
- an&rsquo; sim&rsquo;lar energetic localities, I never trembles for my life, an&rsquo; goes
- about plumb furtive, expectin&rsquo; every moment is goin&rsquo; to be my next that
- a-way, ontil I finds myse&rsquo;f camped on the sunrise side of the Alleghenies.
- </p>
- <p>
- Nacherally, I admits, thar has been a modicum of blood shed west an&rsquo; some
- slight share tharof can be charged to Arizona. No, I can&rsquo;t say I deplores
- these killin&rsquo;s none. Every gent has got to die. For one, I&rsquo;m mighty glad
- the game&rsquo;s been rigged that a-way. I&rsquo;d shore hesitate a lot to be born
- onless I was shore I&rsquo;d up an&rsquo; some day cash in. Live forever? No, don&rsquo;t
- confer on me no sech gloomy outlook. If a angel was to appear in our midst
- an&rsquo; saw off on me the news that I was to go on an&rsquo; on as I be now, livin&rsquo;
- forever like that Wanderin&rsquo; Jew, the information would stop my clock right
- thar. I&rsquo;d drop dead in my moccasins.
- </p>
- <p>
- It don&rsquo;t make much difference, when you gives yourse&rsquo;f to a ca&rsquo;m
- consid&rsquo;ration of the question as to when you dies or how you dies. The
- important thing is to die as becomes a gent of sperit who has nothin&rsquo; to
- regret. Every one soon or late comes to his trail&rsquo;s end. Life is like a
- faro game. One gent has ten dollars, another a hundred, another a
- thousand, and still others has rolls big enough to choke a cow. But
- whether a gent is weak or strong, poor or rich, it&rsquo;s written in advance
- that he&rsquo;s doomed to go broke final. He&rsquo;s doomed to die. Tharfore, when
- that&rsquo;s settled, of what moment is it whether he goes broke in an hour, or
- pikes along for a week&mdash;dies to-day or postpones his funeral for
- years an&rsquo; mebby decades?
- </p>
- <p>
- Holdin&rsquo; to these yere views, you can see without my tellin&rsquo; that a
- killin&rsquo;, once it be over, ain&rsquo;t likely to harass me much. Like the rest of
- you-all, I&rsquo;ve been trailin&rsquo; out after my grave ever since I was foaled&mdash;on
- a hunt for my sepulcher, you may say&mdash;an&rsquo; it ought not to shock me to
- a showdown jest because some pard tracks up ag&rsquo;inst his last restin&rsquo;
- place, spreads his blankets an&rsquo; goes into final camp before it come my own
- turn.
- </p>
- <p>
- But, speakin&rsquo; of killin&rsquo;s, the most onusual I ever hears of is when Wild
- Bill Hickox cleans up the Jake McCandlas gang. This Bill I knows intimate;
- he&rsquo;s not so locoed as his name might lead a gent to concloode. The truth
- is, he&rsquo;s a mighty crafty, careful form of sport; an&rsquo; he never pulled a gun
- ontil he knew what for an&rsquo; never onhooked it ontil he knew what at.
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; speakin&rsquo; of the latter&mdash;the onhookin&rsquo; part&mdash;that Wild Bill
- never missed. That&rsquo;s his one gift; he&rsquo;s born to make a center shot
- whenever his six-shooter expresses itse&rsquo;f.
- </p>
- <p>
- This McCandlas time is doorin&rsquo; them border troubles between Missouri an&rsquo;
- Kansas. Jest prior tharunto, Bill gets the ill-will of the Missouri outfit
- by some gun play he makes at Independence, then the eastern end of the old
- Santa Fe trail. What Bill accomplishes at Independence is a heap effectual
- an&rsquo; does him proud. But it don&rsquo;t endear him none to the Missouri heart.
- Moreover, it starts a passel of resentful zealots to lookin&rsquo; for him a
- heap f&rsquo;rocious, an&rsquo; so he pulls his freight.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s mebby six months later when Bill is holdin&rsquo; down a stage station
- some&rsquo;eres over in Kansas&mdash;it&rsquo;s about a day&rsquo;s ride at a road-gait from
- Independence&mdash;for Ben Holiday&rsquo;s overland line. Thar&rsquo;s the widow of a
- <i>compadre</i> of Bill who has a wickeyup about a mile away, an&rsquo; one day
- Bill gets on his hoss, Black Nell, an&rsquo; goes romancin&rsquo; over to see how the
- widow&rsquo;s gettin&rsquo; on. This Black Nell hoss of Bill&rsquo;s is some cel&rsquo;brated.
- Black Nell is tame as a kitten an&rsquo; saveys more&rsquo;n a hired man. She&rsquo;d climb
- a pa&rsquo;r of steps an&rsquo; come sa&rsquo;n-terin&rsquo; into a dance hall or a hurdy gurdy if
- Bill calls to her, an&rsquo; I makes no doubt she&rsquo;d a-took off her own saddle
- an&rsquo; bridle an&rsquo; gone to bed with a pa&rsquo;r of blankets, same as folks, if Bill
- said it was the proper antic for a pony.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s afternoon when Bill rides up to pow-wow with this relict of his pard.
- As he comes into the one room&mdash;for said wickeyup ain&rsquo;t palatial, an&rsquo;
- consists of one big room, that a-way, an&rsquo; a jim-crow leanto&mdash;Bill
- says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Howdy, Jule?&rdquo; like that.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Howdy, Bill?&rdquo; says the widow. &ldquo;&rsquo;Light an&rsquo; rest your hat, while I
- roam &rsquo;round an&rsquo; rustle some chuck.&rdquo; This widow has the right idee.
- </p>
- <p>
- While Bill is camped down on a stool waitin&rsquo; for the promised <i>carne</i>
- an&rsquo; flap-jacks, or whatever may be the grub his hostess is aimin&rsquo; to
- on-loose, he casts a glance outen the window. He&rsquo;s interested at once. Off
- across the plains he discerns the killer, McCandlas an&rsquo; his band p&rsquo;intin&rsquo;
- straight for the widow&rsquo;s. They&rsquo;re from Missouri; thar&rsquo;s &rsquo;leven of
- &rsquo;em, corral count, an&rsquo; all &ldquo;bad.&rdquo; As they can see his mare, Black
- Nell, standin&rsquo; in front of the widow&rsquo;s, Bill argues jestly that the
- McCandlas outfit knows he&rsquo;s thar; an&rsquo; from the speed they&rsquo;re makin&rsquo; in
- their approach, he likewise dedooces that they&rsquo;re a heap eager for his
- company.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill don&rsquo;t have to study none to tell that thar&rsquo;s somebody goin&rsquo; to get
- action. It&rsquo;s likely to be mighty onequal, but thar&rsquo;s no he&rsquo;p; an&rsquo; so Bill
- pulls his gun-belt tighter, an&rsquo; organizes to go as far as he can. He has
- with him only one six-shooter; that&rsquo;s a severe setback. Now, if he was
- packin&rsquo; two the approaching war jig would have carried feachers of
- comfort. But he&rsquo;s got a nine-inch bowie, which is some relief. When his
- six-shooter&rsquo;s empty, he can fall back on the knife, die hard, an&rsquo; leave
- his mark.
- </p>
- <p>
- As Bill rolls the cylinder of his gun to see if she&rsquo;s workin&rsquo; free, an&rsquo;
- loosens the bowie to avoid delays, his eye falls on a rifle hangin&rsquo; above
- the door.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Is it loaded, Jule?&rdquo; asks Bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Loaded to the gyards,&rdquo; says the widow.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; that ain&rsquo;t no fool of a piece of news, neither,&rdquo; says Bill, as he
- reaches down the rifle. &ldquo;Now, Jule, you-all better stampede into the
- cellar a whole lot ontil further orders. Thar&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to be heated times
- &rsquo;round yere an&rsquo; you&rsquo;d run the resk of gettin&rsquo; scorched.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;d sooner stay an&rsquo; see, Bill,&rdquo; says the widow. &ldquo;You-all knows how eager
- an&rsquo; full of cur&rsquo;osity a lady is,&rdquo; an&rsquo; here the widow beams on Bill an&rsquo;
- simpers coaxin&rsquo;ly.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; I&rsquo;d shore say stay, Jule,&rdquo; says Bill, &ldquo;if you could turn a trick. But
- you sees yourse&rsquo;f, you couldn&rsquo;t. An&rsquo; you&rsquo;d be in the way.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Thar&rsquo;s a big burrow out in the yard; what Kansas people deenominates as a
- cyclone cellar. It&rsquo;s like a cave; every se&rsquo;f-respectin&rsquo; Kansas fam&rsquo;ly has
- one. They may not own no bank account; they may not own no good repoote;
- but you can gamble, they&rsquo;ve got a cyclone cave.
- </p>
- <p>
- Shore, it ain&rsquo;t for ornament, nor yet for ostentation. Thar&rsquo;s allers a
- breeze blowin&rsquo; plenty stiff across the plains. Commonly, it&rsquo;s strenyous
- enough to pick up a empty bar&rsquo;l an&rsquo; hold it ag&rsquo;inst the side of a buildin&rsquo;
- for a week. Sech is the usual zephyr. Folks don&rsquo;t heed them none. But now
- an&rsquo; then one of these yere cyclones jumps a gent&rsquo;s camp, an&rsquo; then it&rsquo;s
- time to make for cover. Thar&rsquo;s nothin&rsquo; to be said back to a cyclone. It&rsquo;ll
- take the water outen a well, or the money outen your pocket, or the ha&rsquo;r
- off your head; it&rsquo;ll get away with everything about you incloodin&rsquo; your
- address. Your one chance is a cyclone cellar; an&rsquo; even that refooge ain&rsquo;t
- no shore-thing, for I knowed a cyclone once that simply feels down an&rsquo;
- pulls a badger outen his hole. Still, sech as the last, is onfrequent.
- </p>
- <p>
- The widow accepts Bill&rsquo;s advice an&rsquo; makes for the storm cave. This leaves
- Bill happy an&rsquo; easy in his mind, for it gives him plenty of room an&rsquo;
- nothin&rsquo; to think of but himse&rsquo;f. An&rsquo; Bill shore admires a good fight.
- </p>
- <p>
- He don&rsquo;t have long to wait after the widow stampedes. Bill hears the sweep
- of the &rsquo;leven McCandlas hosses as they come chargin&rsquo; up. No, he
- can&rsquo;t see; he ain&rsquo;t quite that weak-minded as to be lookin&rsquo; out the
- window.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the band halts, Bill hears McCandlas say:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Shore, gents; that&rsquo;s Wild Bill&rsquo;s hoss. We&rsquo;ve got him treed an&rsquo; out on a
- limb; to-morry evenin&rsquo; we&rsquo;ll put that long-ha&rsquo;red skelp of his in a
- showcase in Independence.&rdquo; Then McCandlas gives a whoop, an&rsquo; bluffs Bill
- to come out. &ldquo;Come out yere, Bill; we needs you to decide a bet,&rdquo; yells
- McCandlas. &ldquo;Come out; thar&rsquo;s no good skulkin&rsquo;.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Say, Jake,&rdquo; retorts Bill; &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll gamble that you an&rsquo; your hoss thieves
- ain&rsquo;t got the sand to come after me. Come at once if you comes; I despises
- delays, an&rsquo; besides I&rsquo;ve got to be through with you-all an&rsquo; back to the
- stage station by dark.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll put you where thar ain&rsquo;t no stage lines, Bill, long before dark,&rdquo;
- says McCandlas. An&rsquo; with that he comes caperin&rsquo; through the window, sash,
- glass, an&rsquo; the entire lay-out, as blithe as May an&rsquo; a gun in each hand.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill cuts loose the Hawkins as he&rsquo;s anxious to get the big gun off his
- mind. It stops McCandlas, &ldquo;squar&rsquo; in the door,&rdquo; as they says in monte;
- only it&rsquo;s the window. McCandlas falls dead outside.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; I&rsquo;m sorry for that, too,&rdquo; says Bill to him-se&rsquo;f. &ldquo;I&rsquo;m preemature some
- about that shot. I oughter let Jake come in. Then I could have got his
- guns.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- When McCandlas goes down, the ten others charges with a whoop. They comes
- roarin&rsquo; through every window; they breaks in the door; they descends on
- Bill&rsquo;s fortress like a &rsquo;possum on a partridge nest!
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; then ensoos the busiest season which any gent ever cuts in upon. The
- air is heavy with bullets an&rsquo; thick with smoke. The walls of the room
- later looks like a colander.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s a mighty fav&rsquo;rable fight, an&rsquo; Bill don&rsquo;t suffer none in his repoote
- that Kansas afternoon. Faster than you can count, his gun barks; an&rsquo; each
- time thar&rsquo;s a warrior less. One, two, three, four, five, six; they p&rsquo;ints
- out after McCandlas an&rsquo; not a half second between &rsquo;em as they
- starts. It was good luck an&rsquo; good shootin&rsquo; in combination.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the limit; six dead to a single Colt&rsquo;s! No gent ever approaches it
- but once; an&rsquo; that&rsquo;s a locoed sharp named Metzger in Raton. He starts in
- with Moulton who&rsquo;s the alcade, an&rsquo; beefs five an&rsquo; creases another; an&rsquo; all
- to the same one gun. The public, before he can reload, hangs Metzger to
- the sign in front of the First National Bank, so he don&rsquo;t have much time
- to enjoy himse&rsquo;f reviewin&rsquo; said feats.
- </p>
- <p>
- Rifle an&rsquo; six-shooter empty; seven dead an&rsquo; done, an&rsquo; four to take his
- knife an&rsquo; talk it over with! That&rsquo;s the situation when Bill pulls his
- bowie an&rsquo; starts to finish up.
- </p>
- <p>
- It shore ain&rsquo;t boy&rsquo;s play; the quintette who&rsquo;s still prancin&rsquo; about the
- field is as bitter a combination as you&rsquo;d meet in a long day&rsquo;s ride. Their
- guns is empty, too; an&rsquo; they, like Bill, down to the steel. An&rsquo; thar&rsquo;s
- reason to believe that the fight from this p&rsquo;int on is even more
- interestin&rsquo; than the part that&rsquo;s gone before. Thar&rsquo;s no haltin&rsquo; or hangin&rsquo;
- back; thar ain&rsquo;t a bashful gent in the herd. They goes to the center like
- one man.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill, who&rsquo;s as quick an&rsquo; strong as a mountain lion, with forty times the
- heart an&rsquo; fire, grips one McCandlas party by the wrist. Thar&rsquo;s a twist an&rsquo;
- a wrench an&rsquo; Bill onj&rsquo;ints his arm.
- </p>
- <p>
- That&rsquo;s the last of the battle Bill remembers. All is whirl an&rsquo; smoke an&rsquo;
- curse an&rsquo; stagger an&rsquo; cut an&rsquo; stab after that, with tables crashin&rsquo; an&rsquo;
- the wreck an&rsquo; jangle of glass.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the end comes. Whether the struggle from the moment when it&rsquo;s got down
- to the bowies lasts two minutes or twenty, Bill never can say. When it&rsquo;s
- over, Bill finds himse&rsquo;f still on his feet, an&rsquo; he&rsquo;s pushin&rsquo; the last gent
- off his blade. Split through the heart, this yere last sport falls to the
- floor in a dead heap, an&rsquo; Bill&rsquo;s alone, blood to both shoulders.
- </p>
- <p>
- Is Bill hurt? Gents, it ain&rsquo;t much likely he&rsquo;s put &rsquo;leven fightin&rsquo;
- men into the misty beyond, the final four with a knife, an&rsquo; him plumb
- scatheless! No, Bill&rsquo;s slashed so he wouldn&rsquo;t hold hay; an&rsquo; thar&rsquo;s more
- bullets in his frame than thar&rsquo;s pease in a pod. The Doc who is called in,
- an&rsquo; who prospects Bill, allers allowed that it&rsquo;s the mistake of his life
- he don&rsquo;t locate Bill an&rsquo; work him for a lead mine.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the battle is over an&rsquo; peace resoomes its sway, Bill begins to
- stagger. An&rsquo; he&rsquo;s preyed on by thirst. Bill steadies himse&rsquo;f along the
- wall; an&rsquo; weak an&rsquo; half blind from the fogs of fightin&rsquo;, he feels his way
- out o&rsquo; doors.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thar&rsquo;s a tub of rain-water onder the eaves; it&rsquo;s the only thing Bill&rsquo;s
- thinkin&rsquo; of at the last. He bends down to drink; an&rsquo; with that, faints an&rsquo;
- falls with his head in the tub.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the widow who rescoos Bill; she emerges outen her cyclone cellar an&rsquo;
- saves Bill from drownin&rsquo;. An&rsquo; he lives, too; lives to be downed years
- afterward when up at Deadwood a timid party who don&rsquo;t dare come &rsquo;round
- in front, drills Bill from the r&rsquo;ar. But what can you look for? Folks who
- lives by the sword will perish by the sword as the scripters sets forth,
- an&rsquo; I reckons now them warnin&rsquo;s likewise covers guns.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And did that really happen?&rdquo; asked the Red Nosed Gentleman, drawing a
- deep breath.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s as troo as that burgundy you&rsquo;re absorbin&rsquo;,&rdquo; replied the Old
- Cattleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I can well believe it,&rdquo; observed the Sour Gentleman; &ldquo;a strong hour makes
- a strong man. Did this Wild Bill Hickox wed the widow who pulled him out
- of the tub?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which I don&rsquo;t think so,&rdquo; returned the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;If he does, Bill
- keeps them nuptials a secret. But it&rsquo;s a cinch he don&rsquo;t. As I says at the
- jump, Bill is a mighty wary citizen an&rsquo; not likely to go walkin&rsquo; into no
- sech ambuscade as a widow.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You do not think, then,&rdquo; observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, &ldquo;that a wife
- would be a blessing?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;She wouldn&rsquo;t be to Wild Bill Hickox,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;Thar is
- gents who ought never to wed, an&rsquo; Bill&rsquo;s one. He was bound to be killed
- final; the game law was out on Bill for years. Now when a gent is shore to
- cash in that a-way, why should he go roundin&rsquo; up a wife? Thar oughter be a
- act of congress ag&rsquo;in it, an&rsquo; I onderstand that some sech measure is to be
- introdooced.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Passing laws,&rdquo; remarked the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;is no such easy matter, now,
- as passing the bottle.&rdquo; Here the Jolly Doctor looked meaningly at the Red
- Nosed Gentleman, who thereupon shoved the burgundy into the Jolly Doctor&rsquo;s
- hand with all conceivable alacrity. Like every good drinker, the Red Nosed
- Gentleman loved a cup companion. &ldquo;There was a western person,&rdquo; went on the
- Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;named Jim Britt, who came east to have a certain law
- passed; he didn&rsquo;t find it flowers to his feet.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What now was the deetails?&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;The doin&rsquo;s an&rsquo;
- plottin&rsquo;s an&rsquo; doubleplays of them law-makin&rsquo; mavericks in congress is
- allers a heap thrillin&rsquo; to me.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Very well,&rdquo; responded the Jolly Doctor; &ldquo;let each light a fresh cigar,
- for it&rsquo;s rather a long story, and when all are comfortable, I&rsquo;ll give you
- the history of &lsquo;How Jim Britt Passed His Bill.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0013" id="link2HCH0013"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XIII.&mdash;HOW JIM BRITT PASSED HIS BILL.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">L</span>ast Chance was a
- hamlet in southeastern Kansas. Last Chance, though fervid, was not large.
- Indeed, a cowboy in a spirit of insult born of a bicker with the town
- marshal had said he could throw the loop of his lariat about Last Chance
- and drag it from the map with his pony. However, this was hyperbole.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt was not the least conspicuous among the men of Last Chance.
- Withal, Jim Britt was much diffused throughout the commerce of that
- village and claimed interests in a dozen local establishments, from a
- lumber yard to a hotel. Spare of frame, and of an anxious predatory nose,
- was Jim Britt; and his gray eyes ever roving for a next investment; and
- the more novel the enterprise, the more leniently did Jim Britt regard it.
- The new had for him a fascination, since he was in way and heart an
- Alexander and hungered covetously for further worlds to conquer. Thus it
- befell that Jim Britt came naturally to his desire to build a railway when
- the exigencies of his affairs opened gate to the suggestion.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt became the proprietor of a lead mine&mdash;or was it zinc?&mdash;in
- southeastern Missouri, and no mighty distance from his own abode of Last
- Chance. The mine was somewhat thrust upon Jim Britt by Fate, since he
- accepted it for a bad debt. It was &ldquo;lead mine or nothing,&rdquo; and Jim Britt,
- whose instincts, like Nature, abhorred a vacuum, took the mine. It was a
- good mine, but a drawback lurked in the location; it lay over the Ozark
- Hills and far away from any nearest whistle of a railroad.
- </p>
- <p>
- This isolation taught Jim Britt the thought of connecting his mine by rail
- with Last Chance; the latter was an easiest nearest point, and the route
- offered a most accommodating grade. A straight line, or as the crow is
- said to fly but doesn&rsquo;t, would make the length of the proposed improvement
- fifty miles. When done, it would serve not only Jim Britt&rsquo;s mine, but
- admirably as a feeder for the Fort Scot and Gulf; and Jim Britt foresaw
- riches in that. Altogether, the notion was none such desperate scheme.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was a side serious, however, which must be considered. The line
- would cross the extreme northeast angle of the Indian Territory, or as it
- is styled in those far regions, the &ldquo;Nation,&rdquo; and for this invasion of
- redskin holdings the consent of the general government, through its
- Congress assembled, must be secured.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt; far from being depressed, said he would go to Washington and
- get it; he rather reveled in the notion. Samantha, his wife, shook her
- head doubtfully.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Jim Britt,&rdquo; said Samantha, severely, &ldquo;you ain&rsquo;t been east since Mr.
- Lincoln was shot. You know no more of Washington than a wolf. I&rsquo;d give
- that railroad up; and especially, I&rsquo;d keep away from Congress. Don&rsquo;t try
- to braid that mule&rsquo;s tail&rdquo;&mdash;Samantha was lapsing into the metaphor
- common of Last Chance&mdash;&ldquo;don&rsquo;t try to braid that mule&rsquo;s tail. It&rsquo;ll
- kick you plumb out o&rsquo; the stall.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But Jim Britt was firm; the mule simile in no sort abated him.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0010" id="linkimage-0010"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0199.jpg" alt="0199 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0199.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But what could you do with Congress?&rdquo; persisted Samantha; &ldquo;you, a
- stranger and alone?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt argued that one determined individual could do much; energy
- wisely employed would overcome mere numbers. He cited the ferocious
- instance of a dim relative of his own, a vivacious person yclept Turner,
- who because of injuries fancied or real, hung for years about the tribal
- flanks of the Comanches and potted their leading citizens. This the
- vigorous Turner kept up until he had corralled sixty Comanche top-nots;
- and the end was not yet when the Comanches themselves appealed to their
- agent for protection. They said they couldn&rsquo;t assemble for a green corn
- dance, or about a regalement of baked dog, without the Winchester of the
- unauthorized Turner barking from some convenient hill; the squaws would
- then have nothing left but to wail the death song of some eminent spirit
- thus sifted from their midst. When they rode to the hill in hunt of
- Turner, he would be miles away on his pony, and adding to his safety with
- every jump. The Comanches were much disgusted, and demanded the agent&rsquo;s
- interference.
- </p>
- <p>
- Upon this mournful showing, Turner was brought in and told to desist; and
- as a full complement of threats, which included among their features a
- trial at Fort Smith and a gibbet, went with the request, Turner was in the
- end prevailed on to let his Winchester sleep in its rack, and thereafter
- the Comanches danced and devoured dog unscared. The sullen Turner said the
- Comanches had slain his parent long ago; the agent expressed regrets, but
- stuck for it that even with such an impetus a normal vengeance should have
- run itself out with the conquest of those sixty scalps.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt told this story of Turner to Samantha; and then he argued that
- as the Comanches were made to feel a one-man power by the industrious
- Turner, so would he, Jim Britt, for all he stood alone, compel Congress to
- his demands. He would take that right of way across the Indian Territory
- from between their very teeth. He was an American citizen and Congress was
- his servant; in this wise spake Jim Britt.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s all right,&rdquo; argued the pessimistic Samantha; &ldquo;that&rsquo;s all right
- about your drunken Turner; but he had a Winchester. Now you ain&rsquo;t goin&rsquo; to
- tackle Congress with no gun, Jim Britt.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Despite the gloomy prophecies of Samantha, whom Jim Britt looked on as a
- kind of Cassandra without having heard of Cassandra, our would-be railroad
- builder wound up the threads and loose ends of his Last Chance businesses,
- and having, as he described it, &ldquo;fixed things so they would run themselves
- for a month,&rdquo; struck out for Washington. Jim Britt carried twenty-five
- hundred dollars in his pocket, confidence in his heart, and Samantha&rsquo;s
- forebode of darkling failure in his ears.
- </p>
- <p>
- While no fop and never setting up to be the local Brummel, Jim Britt&rsquo;s
- clothes theretofore had matched both his hour and environment, and held
- their decent own in the van of Last Chance fashion. But the farther Jim
- Britt penetrated to the eastward in his native land, the more his raiment
- seemed to fall behind the age; and at the last, when he was fairly within
- the gates of Washington, he began to feel exceeding wild and strange.
- Also, it affected him somewhat to discover himself almost alone as a
- tobacco chewer, and that a great art preserved in its fullness by Last
- Chance had fallen to decay along the Atlantic. These, however, were
- questions of minor moment, and save that his rococo garb drove the
- sensitive Jim Britt into cheap lodgings in Four-and-one-half Street,
- instead of one of the capital&rsquo;s gilded hotels, they owned no effect.
- </p>
- <p>
- This last is set forth in defence against an imputation of parsimony on
- the side of Jim Britt. He was one who spent his money like a king whenever
- and wherever his education or experience pointed the way. It was his
- clothes of a remote period to make him shy, else Jim Britt would have
- shrunk not from the Raleigh itself, but climbed and clambered and browsed
- among the timberline prices of its grill-room, as safe and satisfied as
- ever browsed mountain goat on the high levels of its upland home. Yea,
- forsooth! Jim Britt, like a sailor ashore, could spend his money with a
- free and happy hand.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt, acting on a hint offered of his sensibilities, for a first step
- reclothed himself from a high-priced shop; following these improvements,
- save for the fact that he appalled the eye as a trifle gorgeous, he might
- not have disturbed the sacred taste of Connecticut Avenue itself. In
- short, in the matter of garb, Jim Britt, while audible, was down to date.
- </p>
- <p>
- With the confidence born of his new clothes&mdash;for clothes in some
- respects may make the man&mdash;Jim Britt sate him down to study Congress.
- He deemed it a citadel to be stormed; not lacking in military genius he
- began to look it over for a weak point.
- </p>
- <p>
- These adventures of Jim Britt now about a record, occurred, you should
- understand, almost a decade ago. In that day there should have been
- eighty-eight senators and three hundred and fifty-six representatives,
- albeit, by reason of death or failure to elect, a not-to-be-noticed
- handful of seats were vacant.
- </p>
- <p>
- By an industrious perusal of the Congressional directory, wherein the
- skeleton of each House was laid out and told in all its divers committee
- small-bones, Jim Britt began to understand a few of the lions in his path.
- For his confusion he found that Congress was sub-divided into full sixty
- committees, beginning with such giant conventions as the Ways and Means,
- Appropriations, Military, Naval, Coinage, Weights and Measures, Banking
- and Currency, Indian, Public Lands, Postal, and Pensions, and dwindling
- down to ignoble riffraff&mdash;which owned each a chairman, a committee
- room, a full complement of clerks and messengers, and an existence, but
- never convened&mdash;like the Committee on Acoustics and Ventliation, and
- Alcoholic Liquor Traffic.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt learned also of the Sergeants at Arms of Senate and House, and
- how these dignitaries controlled the money for those bodies and paid the
- members their salaries. Incidentally, and by way of gossip, he was told of
- that House Sergeant who had levanted with the riches entrusted to his
- hands, and left the broken membership, gnashing its teeth in poverty and
- impotent gloom, unable to draw pay.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then, too, there was a Document Room where the bills and resolutions were
- kept when printed. Also, about each of the five doors of House and Senate,
- when those sacred gatherings were in session, there were situated a host
- of messengers, carried for twelve hundred dollars a year each on the
- Doorkeeper&rsquo;s rolls. It was the duty and pleasure of these myrmidons to
- bring forth members into the corridors, to the end that they be refreshed
- with a word of counsel from constituents who had traveled thither for that
- purpose; and in the finish to lend said constituents money to return home.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt, following these first connings of the directory, went
- personally to the capitol, and from the galleries, leaning his chin on the
- rail the while, gazed earnestly on greatness about the transaction of its
- fame. These studies and personally conducted tours, and those
- conversations to be their incident which came off between Jim Britt and
- chance-blown folk who fell across his pathway, enlarged Jim Britt&rsquo;s store
- of information in sundry fashions. He discovered that full ten thousand
- bills and resolutions were introduced each Congress; that by virtue of a
- mere narrowness of time not more than five per cent, of this storm of
- business could be dealt with, the other ninety-five, whether for good or
- ill, being starved to death for lack of occasion. The days themselves were
- no longer than five working hours since Congress convened at noon.
- </p>
- <p>
- The great radical difference between House and Senate loomed upon Jim
- Britt in a contrast of powers which abode with the presiding officers of
- those mills to grind new laws. The president of the Senate owned few or
- none. He might enforce Jefferson&rsquo;s rules for debates and call a
- recalcitrant senator to order, a call to which the recalcitrant paid
- little heed beyond tart remarks on his part concerning his own high
- determinations to yield to no gavel tyranny, coupled with a forceful
- though conceited assurance flung to the Senate at large, that he, the
- recalcitrant, knew his rights (which he never did), and would uphold them
- (which he never failed to do.) The Senate president named no committees;
- owned no control over the order of business; indeed he was limited to a
- vote on ties, a warning that he would clear the galleries (which was never
- done) when the public therein roosting, applauded, and the right to
- prevent two senators from talking at one and the same time. These marked
- the utmost measure of his influence. Any senator could get the floor for
- any purpose, and talk on any subject from Prester John to Sheep in the
- Seventeenth Century, while his strength stood. Also, and much as dogs have
- kennels permitted them for their habitation, the presiding officer of the
- Senate&mdash;in other words, the Vice-President of the nation&mdash;was
- given a room, separate and secluded to himself, into which he might creep
- when chagrin for his own unimportance should overmaster him or otherwise
- his woes become greater than he might publicly bear.
- </p>
- <p>
- The House Speaker was a vastly different cock, with a louder crow and
- longer spur. The Speaker was a king, indeed; and an absolute monarch or an
- autocrat or what you will that signifies one who may do as he chooses,
- exercise unbridled will, and generally sit beneath the broad shadows of
- the vine and the fig tree of his prerogatives with none to molest him or
- make him afraid. The Speaker was, so to phrase it, the entire House, the
- other three hundred and fifty-five members acting only when he consented
- or compelled them, and then usually by his suggestion and always under his
- thumb. No bill could be considered without the Speaker&rsquo;s permission; and
- then for so long only as he should allow, and by what members he
- preferred. No man could speak to a measure wanting the gracious consent of
- this dignitary; and no word could be uttered&mdash;at least persisted in&mdash;To
- which he felt distaste. The Speaker, when lengths and breadths are
- measured, was greater than the Moscow Czar and showed him a handless
- infant by comparison.
- </p>
- <p>
- As a half-glove of velvet for his iron hand, and to mask and soften his
- pure autocracy&mdash;which if seen naked might shock the spirit of
- Americanism&mdash;there existed a Rules Committee. This subbody, whereof
- the Speaker was chief, carried, besides himself, but two members; and
- these he personally selected, as indeed he did the entire membership of
- every committee on the House muster-rolls. This Rules Committee, with the
- Speaker in absolute sway, acted with reference to the House at large as do
- the Board of Judges for a racecourse. It declared each day what bills
- should be taken up, limited debate, and to pursue the Track simile to a
- last word, called on this race or cleared the course of that race, and
- fairly speaking dry-nursed the House throughout its travels, romps and
- lessons.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt discovered that in all, counting Speaker, Rules Committee, and a
- dozen chairmen of the great committees, there existed no more than fifteen
- folk who might by any stretch of veracity be said to have a least of voice
- in the transaction of House business. In the gagged and bound cases of the
- other three hundred and forty-one, and for what public good or ill to flow
- from them, their constituents would have fared as well had they, instead
- of electing these representatives, confined themselves to writing the
- government a letter setting forth their wants.
- </p>
- <p>
- In reference to his own bill, Jim Britt convinced himself of two imposing
- truths. Anybody would and could introduce it in either House or Senate or
- in both at once; then, when thus introduced and it had taken the routine
- course to the proper committee, the situation would ask the fervent
- agreement of a majority in each body, to say nothing of the Speaker&rsquo;s
- consent&mdash;a consent as hard to gain as a girl&rsquo;s&mdash;to bring it up
- for passage.
- </p>
- <p>
- Nor was there any security of concert. The bill might be fashionable, not
- to say popular, with one body, while the other turned rigid back upon it.
- It might live in the House to die in the Senate, or succeed in the Senate
- and perish in the House. There were no safety and little hope to be won in
- any corner, and the lone certainty to peer forth upon Jim Britt was that
- the chances stood immeasurably against him wherever he turned his eyes.
- The camel for the needle&rsquo;s eye and the rich man into heaven, were easy and
- feasible when laid side by side with the Congressional outlook for his
- bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- While Jim Britt was now sensibly cast down and pressed upon by despair,
- within him the eagerness for triumph grew taller with each day. For one
- daunting matter, should he return empty of hand, Samantha would wear the
- fact fresh and new upon her tongue&rsquo;s end to the last closing of his eyes.
- It would become a daily illustration&mdash;an hourly argument in her
- practiced mouth.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was one good to come to Jim Britt by his investigations and that was
- a good instruction. Like many another, Jim Britt, from the deceitful
- distance of Last Chance, had ever regarded both House and Senate as
- gigantic conspiracies. They were eaten of plot and permeated of intrigue;
- it was all chicane and surprise and sharp practice. Congress was a name
- for traps and gins and pits and snares and deadfalls. The word meant
- tunnels and trap-doors and vaults and dungeons and sinister black whatnot.
- Jim Britt never paused to consider wherefore Congress should, for ends
- either clean or foul, conceal within itself these midnight commodities of
- mask and dark-lantern, and go about its destiny a perennial Guy Fawkes,
- ready to explode a situation with a touch and blow itself and all
- concerned to far-spread flinders. Had he done so he might have dismissed
- these murky beliefs.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is, however, never too late to mend. It began now to dawn upon Jim
- Britt by the morning light of what he read and heard and witnessed, that
- both Houses in their plan and movement were as simple as a wire fence; no
- more recondite than is a pair of shears. They might be wrong, but they
- were not intricate; they might spoil a deal of cloth in their cutting, or
- grow dull of edge or loose of joint and so not cut at all, but they were
- not mysterious. Certainly, Congress was no more a conspiracy than is a
- flock of geese, and a brooding hen would be as guilty of a plot and as
- deep given to intrigue. Congress was a stone wall or a precipice or a
- bridgeless gulf or chloroform or what one would that was stupefying or
- difficult of passage to the border of the impossible, but there dwelt
- nothing occult or secret or unknowable in its bowels. These truths of
- simplicity Jim Britt began to learn and, while they did not cheer, at
- least they served to clear him up.
- </p>
- <p>
- Following two weeks of investigation, Jim Britt secured the introduction
- of his bill. This came off by asking; the representative from the Last
- Chance district performing in the one body, while one of the Kansas
- senators acted in the more venerable convention.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now when the bill was introduced, printed, and in the lap of the proper
- committee, Jim Britt went to work to secure the bill&rsquo;s report. He might as
- well have stormed the skies to steal a star; he found himself as helpless
- as a fly in amber.
- </p>
- <p>
- About this hour in his destinies, Jim Britt made a radical and, as it
- turned, a decisive move. He had now grown used to Washington and
- Washington to him, and while folk still stared and many grinned, Jim Britt
- did not receive that ovation as he moved about which marked and made
- unhappy his earlier days in the town. Believing it necessary to his bill&rsquo;s
- weal, Jim Britt began to haunt John Chamberlin&rsquo;s house of call as then
- was, and to scrape acquaintance with statesmen who passed hours of ease
- and wine in its parlors.
- </p>
- <p>
- In the commencement of his Chamberlin experiences Jim Britt met much to
- affright him. A snowy-bearded senator from Nevada sat at a table. On
- seeing Jim Britt smile upon him in a friendly way&mdash;he was hoping to
- make the senator&rsquo;s acquaintance&mdash;he of the snow-beard, apropos of
- nothing, suddenly thundered:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I have this day read John Sherman&rsquo;s defence of the Crime of &rsquo;Seventy-Three.
- John Sherman contends that no crime was committed because no criminals
- were caught.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- This outburst so dismayed Jim Britt that he sought a far corner and no
- more tempted the explosiveness of Snow-Beard.
- </p>
- <p>
- Again, Jim Britt would engage a venerable senator from Alabama in talk. He
- was instantly taken by the helpless button, and for a quintette of hours
- told of the national need of a Panama Canal, and given a list of what
- railroads in their venality set the flinty face of their opposition to its
- coming about.
- </p>
- <p>
- These things, the thunders of Snow-Beard and the exhaustive settings forth
- of the senator from the south, pierced Jim Britt; for he reflected that if
- the questions of silver and Panama could not be budged for their benefit
- by these gentlemen of beard and long experience and who dwelt well within
- the breastworks of legislation, then his bill for that small right of way,
- and none to aid it save himself in his poor obscurity, could hope for
- nothing except death and burial where it lay.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was a gentleman of Congress well known and loved as the Statesman
- from Tupelo. He was frequent and popular about Chamberlin&rsquo;s. The Statesman
- from Tupelo was a humorist of celebration and one of the redeeming
- features of the House of Representatives. His eye fell upon the queer,
- ungainly form of Jim Britt, with hungry face, eyes keen but guileless, and
- nose of falcon curve.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo beheld in Jim Britt with his Gothic simplicity a
- self-offered prey to the spear of every joker. The Statesman from Tupelo,
- with a specious suavity of accent and a blandness irresistible, drew forth
- Jim Britt in converse. The latter, flustered, flattered, went to extremes
- of confidence and laid frankly bare his railroad hopes and fears which
- were now all fears.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo listened with decorous albeit sympathetic
- gravity. When Jim Britt was done he spoke:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;As you say,&rdquo; observed the Statesman from Tupelo, &ldquo;your one chance is to
- get acquainted with a majority of both Houses and interest them personally
- in your bill.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But how might a party do that soonest?&rdquo; asked Jim Britt. &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t want to
- camp yere for the balance of my days. Besides, thar&rsquo;s Samantha.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Certainly, there&rsquo;s Samantha,&rdquo; assented the Statesman from Tupelo. Then
- following a pause:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I suppose the readiest method would be to give a dinner. Could you
- undertake that?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why, I reckon I could.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The dinner project obtained kindly foothold in the breast of Jim Britt; he
- had read of such banquet deeds as a boy when the papers told the splendors
- of Sam Ward and the Lucullian day of the old Pacific Mail. Jim Britt had
- had no experience of Chamberlin prices, since his purchases at that hotel
- had gone no farther a-field than a now-and-then cigar. He had for most
- part subsisted at those cheap restaurants which&mdash;for that there be
- many threadbare folk, spent with their vigils about Congress, hoping for
- their denied rights&mdash;are singularly abundant in Washington. These
- modest places of regale would give no good notion of Chamberlin&rsquo;s, but
- quite the contrary. Wherefore, Jim Britt, quick with railway ardor and to
- get back to the far-away Samantha, took the urgent initiative, and said he
- would order the dinner for what night the Statesman from Tupelo deemed
- best, if only that potent spirit would agree to gather in the guests.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;We will have the dinner, then,&rdquo; said He of Tupelo, &ldquo;on next Saturday. You
- can tell Chamberlin; and I&rsquo;ll see to the guests.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How many?&rdquo; said Chamberlin&rsquo;s steward, when he received the orders of Jim
- Britt.
- </p>
- <p>
- The coming railway magnate looked at the Statesman from Tupelo.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Say fifty,&rdquo; remarked the Statesman from Tupelo.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt was delighted. He would have liked sixty guests better, or if
- one might, one hundred; but fifty was a fair start. There could come other
- dinners, for the future holds a deal of room. In time Jim Britt might dine
- a full moiety of Congress. The dinner was fixed; the menu left to the
- steward&rsquo;s ingenuity and taste; and now when the situation was thus relaid,
- and Saturday distant but two days, Jim Britt himself called for an
- apartment at Chamberlin&rsquo;s, sent for his one trunk, and established himself
- on the scene of coming dinner action to have instant advantage of whatever
- offered that might be twisted to affect his lead-mine road.
- </p>
- <p>
- The long tables for Jim Britt&rsquo;s dinner were spread in a dining room
- upstairs. There were fifty covers, and room for twenty more should twenty
- come. The apartment itself was a jungle of tropical plants, and the ground
- plan of the feast laid on a scale of bill-threatening magnificence.
- </p>
- <p>
- This was but right. For when the steward would have consulted the exultant
- Jim Britt whose florid imaginings had quite carried him off his feet, that
- gentleman said simply:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Make the play with the bridle off! Don&rsquo;t pinch down for a chip.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Thereupon the steward cast aside restraint and wandered forth upon that
- dinner with a heart care-free and unrestrained. He would make of it a
- moment of terrapin and canvas-back and burgundy which time should date
- from and folk remember for long to the Chamberlin praise.
- </p>
- <p>
- Saturday arrived, and throughout the afternoon Jim Britt, by grace of the
- good steward, who had a pride of his work and loved applause, teetered in
- and out of the dining room and with dancing eye and mouth ajar gave rein
- to admiration. It would be a mighty dinner; it would land his bill in his
- successful hands, and make, besides, a story to amaze the folk of Last
- Chance to a standstill. These be not our words; rather they flowed as the
- advance jubilations of Jim Britt.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was one thought to bear upon Jim Britt to bashful disadvantage. The
- prospect of entertaining fifty statesmen shook his confidence and took his
- breath. To repair these disasters he called privily from time to time for
- whiskey.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was not over-long before he talked thickly his encomiums to the
- steward. On his last visit to survey that fairyland of a dining room, Jim
- Britt counted covers laid for several hundred guests; what was still more
- wondrous, he believed they would come and the prospect rejoiced him. There
- were as many lights, too, in the chandeliers as stars of a still winter&rsquo;s
- night, while the apartment seemed as large as a ten-acre lot and waved a
- broad forest of foliage.
- </p>
- <p>
- That he might be certainly present on the arrival of the first guest&mdash;for
- Jim Britt knew and felt his duties as a host&mdash;Jim Britt lay down upon
- a lounge which, to one side, was deeply, sweetly bowered beneath the
- overhanging palms. Then Jim Britt went earnestly to sleep and was no more
- to be aroused than a dead man.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo appeared; by twos and threes and tens, gathered
- the guests; Jim Britt slept on the sleep of innocence without a dream. A
- steering committee named to that purpose on the spot by the Statesman from
- Tupelo, sought to recover Jim Britt to a knowledge of his fortunate
- honors. Full sixty guests were there, and it was but right that he be
- granted the pleasure, not to say the glory, of their acquaintance.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was of no avail; Jim Britt would not be withdrawn from slumbers deep as
- death. The steering committee suspended its labors of restoration. As said
- the chairman in making his report, which, with a wine glass in his hand,
- he subsequently did between soup and fish:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Our most cunning efforts were fruitless. We even threw water on him, but
- it was like throwing water on a drowned rat.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus did his slumbers defend themselves, and Jim Britt snore unchecked.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the dinner was not to flag. The Statesman from Tupelo took the head of
- the table and the chairman of the steering committee the foot, the repast
- proceeded while wine and humor flowed.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was a dream of a dinner, a most desirable dinner, a dinner that should
- stand for years an honor to Jim Britt of Last Chance. It raged from eight
- till three. Corks and jokes were popping while laughter walked abroad;
- speeches were made and songs were sung. Through it all, the serene founder
- of the feast slept on, and albeit eloquence took up his name and twined
- about it flowery compliment, he knew it not. Tranquilly on his lounge he
- abode in dear oblivion.
- </p>
- <p>
- Things mundane end and so did Jim Britt&rsquo;s dinner. There struck an hour
- when the last song was sung, the last jest was made, and the last guest
- departed away. The Statesman from Tupelo superintended the transportation
- of Jim Britt to his room, and having made him safe, He of Tupelo went also
- out into the morning, and that famous banquet was of the perfumed past.
- </p>
- <p>
- It dawned Wednesday before the Statesman from Tupelo called again at
- Chamberlin&rsquo;s to ask for the excellent Jim Britt. The Statesman from Tupelo
- explained wherefore he was thus laggard.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I thought,&rdquo; he said to Chamberlin, &ldquo;that our friend would need Sunday,
- Monday and Tuesday to straighten up his head.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The man&rsquo;s gone,&rdquo; said Chamberlin; &ldquo;he departed Monday morning.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And whither?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Home to Last Chance.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What did he go home for?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That dinner broke him, I guess. It cost about eighteen hundred dollars,
- and he only had a little over a hundred when the bill was paid.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo mused, while clouds of regret began to gather on
- his brow. His conscience had him by the collar; his conscience was
- avenging that bankruptcy of Jim Britt.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo received Jim Britt&rsquo;s address from the hands of
- Chamberlin&rsquo;s clerk. The next day the Statesman from Tupelo wrote Jim Britt
- a letter. It ran thus:
- </p>
- <p>
- Chamberlin&rsquo;s Hotel.
- </p>
- <p>
- My Dear Sir:&mdash;
- </p>
- <p>
- Don&rsquo;t come back. Write me in full the exact story of what you want and why
- you want it. I&rsquo;ve got a copy of your bill from the Document Room, and so
- soon as I hear from you, shall urge the business before the proper
- committee.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Jim Britt&rsquo;s reply came to hand, the Statesman from Tupelo&mdash;whom
- nobody could resist&mdash;prevailed on the committee to report the bill.
- Then he got the Speaker, who while iron with others was as wax in the
- hands of the Statesman from Tupelo, to recognize him to bring up the bill.
- The House, equally under his spell, gave the Statesman from Tupelo its
- unanimous consent, and the bill was carried in the blink of a moment to
- its third reading and put upon its passage. Then the Statesman from Tupelo
- made a speech; he said it was a confession.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo talked for fifteen minutes while the House
- howled. He told the destruction of Jim Britt. He painted the dinner and
- pointed to those members of the House who attended; he reminded them of
- the desolation which their appetites had worked. He said the House was
- disgraced in the downfall of Jim Britt, and admitted that he and his
- fellow diners were culpable to a last extreme. But there was a way to
- repair all. The bill must be passed, the stain on the House must be washed
- away, Jim Britt must stand again on his fiscal feet, and then he, the
- Statesman from Tupelo, and his fellow conspirators, might once more look
- mankind in the eye.
- </p>
- <p>
- There be those who will do for laughter what they would not do for right.
- The House passed Jim Britt&rsquo;s bill unanimously.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo carried it to the Senate. He explained the
- painful situation and described the remedy. Would the Senate unbend from
- its stern dignity as the greatest deliberative body of any clime or age,
- and come to the rescue of the Statesman from Tupelo and the House of
- Representatives now wallowing in infamy?
- </p>
- <p>
- The Senate would; by virtue of a kink in Senate rules which permitted the
- feat, the Jim Britt Bill was instantly and unanimously adopted without the
- intervention of a committee, the ordering a reference or a roll-call. The
- Statesman from Tupelo thanked the Senate and withdrew, pretending emotion.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was one more journey to make, one more power to consult, and the
- mighty work would be accomplished. The President must sign the bill. The
- Statesman from Tupelo walked in on that tremendous officer of state and
- told him the tale of injury done Jim Britt. The Statesman from Tupelo, by
- way of metaphor, called himself and his fellow sinners, cannibals, and
- showed how they had eaten Jim Britt. Then he reminded the President how he
- had once before gone to the rescue of cannibals in the case of Queen Lil.
- Would he now come to the relief of the Statesman from Tupelo and his
- fellow Anthropophagi of the House?
- </p>
- <p>
- The President was overcome with the word and the idea; he scribbled his
- name in cramped copperplate, and the deed was done. The Jim Britt Bill was
- a law, and Jim Britt saved from the life-long taunts of Samantha, the
- retentive. The road from Last Chance to the lead mine was built, and on
- hearing of its completion the Statesman from Tupelo wrote for an annual
- pass.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Then it was luck after all,&rdquo; said the Red
- </p>
- <p>
- Nosed Gentleman, &ldquo;rather than management to save the day for your Jim
- Britt.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Entirely so,&rdquo; conceded the Jolly Doctor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;There&rsquo;s a mighty deal in luck,&rdquo; observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, sagely.
- &ldquo;Certainly, it&rsquo;s the major part in gambling, and I think, too, luck is a
- decisive element in every victory or defeat a man experiences.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And, now,&rdquo; observed the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;now that you mention gambling,
- suppose you redeem your promise and give us the story of &lsquo;How to Tell the
- Last Four.&rsquo; The phrase is dark to me and has no meaning, but I inferred
- from what you were saying when you used it, that you alluded to some game
- of chance. Assuredly, I crave pardon if I be in error,&rdquo; and now the Sour
- Gentleman bowed with vast politeness.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You are not in error,&rdquo; returned the Red Nosed Gentleman, &ldquo;and I did refer
- to gambling. Casino, however, when played by Casino Joe was no game of
- chance, but of science; his secret, he said in explanation, lay in &lsquo;How to
- Tell the Last Four.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0014" id="link2HCH0014"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XIV.&mdash;HOW TO TELL THE LAST FOUR.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">C</span>asino Joe, when
- thirty years ago he came about the Bowery, was in manner and speech a
- complete expression of the rustical. His brow was high and fine and wise;
- but lank hair of yellow spoiled with its ragged fringe his face&mdash;a
- sallow face, wide of mouth and with high cheek bones. His garb was
- farmerish; kip-skin boots, coat and trousers of gray jeans, hickory shirt,
- and soft shapeless hat. Nor was Casino Joe in disguise; these habiliments
- made up the uniform of his ancestral New Hampshire. Countryman all over,
- was Casino Joe, and this look of the uncouth served him in his chosen
- profession.
- </p>
- <p>
- Possibly &ldquo;chosen&rdquo; as a term is indiscreet. Gamblers are born and not made;
- they occur and they do not choose; they are, compared with more
- conservative and lawful men, what wolves are to honest dogs&mdash;cousins,
- truly, but tameless depredators, living lean and hard, and dying when die
- they do, neglected, lone and poor. Yet it is fate; they are born to it as
- much as is the Ishmael wolf and must run their midnight downhill courses.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gamblers, that is true gamblers, are folk of specialties. Casino Joe&rsquo;s was
- the game which gave to him his name&mdash;at casino he throve invincibly.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is my gift,&rdquo; he said.
- </p>
- <p>
- Two things were with Casino Joe at birth; the genius for casino and that
- jack-knife talent to whittle which belongs with true-born Yankees. Of this
- latter I had proof long after poor Casino Joe wras dead and nourishing the
- grass. The races were in Boston; it was when Goldsmith Maid reigned Queen
- of the trotting turf. Her owner came to me at the Adams House and told how
- the aged sire of Goldsmith Maid, the great Henry Clay, was in his equine,
- joint-stiffened dotage pastured on a not too distant farm. He was eager to
- have a look at the old horse; and I went with him for this pilgrimage.
- </p>
- <p>
- As we drove up to the tavern which the farmstead we sought surrounded, my
- curious eye was caught by a fluttering windmill contrivance perched upon
- the gable. It was the figure of a woman done in pine and perhaps four feet
- of height, carved in the somewhat airy character of a ballet dancer.
- Instead of a dance, however, the lady contented herself with an exhibition
- of Indian Club swinging&mdash;one in each pine palm; the breeze offering
- the whirling impulse&mdash;in the execution wherof she poised herself with
- one foot on a wooden ball not unlike the arrowing bronze Diana of Madison
- Square. This figure, twirling clubs, as a mere windmill would have been
- amazing enough; but as though this were not sufficiently wondrous, at
- regular intervals our ballet dancer shifted her feet on the ball,
- replacing the right with the left and again the left with the right in
- measured alternation. The miracle of it held me transfixed.
- </p>
- <p>
- The host came fatly to his front stoop and smiled upon my wide-eyed
- interest.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Where did you get it?&rdquo; I asked.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That was carved with a jack-knife,&rdquo; replied mine host, &ldquo;by a party called
- &lsquo;Casino Joe.&rsquo; It took him&rsquo;most a year; he got it mounted and goin&rsquo; jest
- before he died.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- For long I had lost trace of Casino Joe; it was now at this change house I
- blundered on the news how my old gambling friend of the Bowery came with
- his consumption and some eight thousand dollars&mdash;enough to end one&rsquo;s
- life with&mdash;and made this place home until his death. His grave lay
- across a field in the little rural burying ground where he had played when
- a boy, for Casino Joe was native of these parts.
- </p>
- <p>
- There were no cheatings or tricky illicitisms hidden in Joe&rsquo;s supremacies
- of casino. They were works of a wax-like memory which kept the story of
- the cards as one makes entries in a ledger. When the last hands were out
- between Joe and an adversary, a glance at his mental entries of cards
- already played, and another at his own hand, unerringly informed him of
- what cards his opponent held. This he called &ldquo;Telling the last four.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was as an advantage more than enough to enable Joe to win; and while I
- lived in his company, I never knew him to be out of pocket by that
- divertisement. The marvel was that he could keep accurate track of
- fifty-two cards as they fell one after the other into play, and do these
- feats of memory in noise-ridden bar-rooms and amid a swirl of conversation
- in which he more or less bore part.
- </p>
- <p>
- Those quick folk of the fraternity whom he encountered and who from time
- to time lost money to Casino Joe, never once suspected his victories to be
- a result of mere memory. They held that some cheat took place. But as it
- was not detectable and no man might point it out, no word of fault was
- uttered. Joe took the money and never a protest; for it is as much an
- axiom of the gaming table as it is of the law that &ldquo;Fraud must be proved
- and will never be presumed or inferred.&rdquo; With no evidence, therefore, the
- losing gamblers made no protesting charge, and Joe went forward collecting
- the wealth of any and all who fought with him at his favorite science.
- </p>
- <p>
- Casino Joe, as I have said, accounted for his mastery at casino by his
- power to &ldquo;Tell the last four,&rdquo; and laid it all to memory.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And yet,&rdquo; said Joe one evening as I urged him to impart to me his secret
- more in detail, &ldquo;it may depend on something else. As I&rsquo;ve told you, it&rsquo;s
- my gift. Folk have their gifts. Once when I was in the town of Warrensburg
- in Western Missouri, I was shown a man who had gifts for mathematics that
- were unaccountable. He was a coarse, animalish creature, this
- mathematician; a half idiot and utterly without education. A sullen,
- unclean beast of a being, he shuffled about in a queer, plantigrade
- fashion like a bear. He was ill-natured, yet too timid to do harm; and
- besides a genius for figures, his distinguishing characteristics were
- hunger measured by four men&rsquo;s rations and an appetite for whiskey which to
- call swinish would be marking a weakness on one&rsquo;s own part in the art of
- simile. Yet this witless creature, unable to read his own printed name,
- knew as by an instinct every mathematical or geometrical term. You might
- propose nothing as a problem that he would not instantly solve. He could
- tell you like winking, the area of a seven or eight-angled figure so you
- but gave him the dimensions; he would announce the surface measurements of
- a sphere when told either its diameter or circumference. Once, as a poser,
- a learned teacher proposed a supposititious cone seven feet in altitude
- and with a diameter of three feet at the base, and asked at what distance
- from the apex it should be divided to make both parts equal of bulk and
- weight. The gross, growling being made correct, unhesitating reply. This
- monster of mathematics seemed also to carry a chronometer in his stomach,
- for day or night, he could and would&mdash;for a drink of rum&mdash;tell
- you the hour to any splinter of a second. You might set your watch by him
- as if he were the steeple clock. I don&rsquo;t profess,&rdquo; concluded Casino Joe,
- &ldquo;to either the habits or the imbecility of this genius of figures, yet it
- may well be that my abilities to keep track of fifty-two Cards as they
- appear in play and know at every moment&mdash;as a bookkeeper does a
- balance&mdash;what cards are yet to come, are not of cultivation or
- acquirement, but were extant within me at my birth.&rdquo; When Casino Joe
- appeared in the Bowery he came to gamble at cards. That buzzing
- thoroughfare was then the promenade of the watchful brotherhood of chance.
- In that hour, too, it stood more the fashion&mdash;for there are fashions
- in gambling as in everything else&mdash;to win and lose money at
- short-cards, and casino enjoyed particular vogue. There were scores of
- eminent practitioners about New York, and Joe had little trouble in
- securing recognition. Indeed, he might have played the full twenty-four
- hours of every day could he have held up his head to such labors.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was at the advent of our rural Joe into metropolitan circles none
- more alert or breathless for pastmastery in unholy speculation than
- myself. About twenty-one should have been my years, and I carried that
- bubbling spirit for success common to the youth of every walk. <i>Aut
- Cosar aut nullus!</i> was my warcry, and I did not consider Joe and his
- career for long before I was slave to the one hope of finally gaining his
- secret. One might found fortune on it; like the philosopher&rsquo;s stone it
- turned everything to gold.
- </p>
- <p>
- With those others who fell before Joe I also believed his success to be
- offspring of some cheat. And while the rustic Joe was engaged against some
- fellow immoralist, I&rsquo;ve sat and watched for hours upon end to discover
- what winding thing Joe did. There was no villainy of double dealing or
- chicane of cut-shifting or of marked cards at which I was not adept. And
- what I could so darkly perform I was equally quick to discover when
- another attempted it. But, albeit I eyed poor Joe with a cat&rsquo;s vigilance&mdash;a
- vigilance to have saved the life of Argus had he but emulated it with his
- hundred eyes&mdash;I noted nothing. And the reason was a simple one. There
- was literally nothing to discover; Joe played honestly enough; his
- advantage dwelt in his memory and that lay hidden within his head.
- </p>
- <p>
- Despairing of a discovery by dint of watching, I made friendly overtures
- to Joe, hoping to wheedle a secret which I could not surprise. My proffers
- of comradeship were met more than half way. Joe was a kindly though a
- lonely soul and had few friends; his queer garb of the cowpastures
- together with his unfailing domination at casino kept others of the
- fraternity at a distance. Also I had been much educated of books by Father
- Glennon, and put in my spare time with reading. As Joe himself had dived
- somewhat into books, we were doubly drawn to each other. Hours have we sat
- together in Joe&rsquo;s nobly furnished rooms&mdash;for he lived well if he did
- not dress well&mdash;and overhauled for our mutual amusement the
- literature of the centuries back to Chaucer and his Tabard Inn.
- </p>
- <p>
- At this time Joe was already in the coils of that consumption whereof at
- last he died. And what with a racking cough and an inability to breathe
- while lying down, Joe seldom slept in a bed. The best he might do was to
- gain what snatches of slumber he could while propped in an arm-chair. It
- thus befell that at his suggestion and to tell the whole truth, at his
- generous expense, I came finally to room with Joe. Somebody should utilize
- the bed. Being young and sound of nerves, his restless night-roamings
- about the floors disturbed not me; I slept serenely through as I doubtless
- would through the crack of doom had such calamity surprised us at that
- time, and Joe and I prospered bravely in company.
- </p>
- <p>
- Beseech and plead as I might, however, Joe would not impart to me that
- hidden casino strength beyond his word that no fraud was practiced&mdash;a
- fact whereof my watchings had made me sure&mdash;and curtly describing it
- as an ability to &ldquo;Tell the last four.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- While Joe housed me as his guest for many months and paid the bills, one
- is not to argue therefrom any unhappy pauperism on my boyish part. In good
- sooth! I was more than rich during those days, with a fortune of anywhere
- from five hundred to as many as four thousand dollars. Like all disciples
- of chance I had these riches ever ready in my pocket for what prey might
- offer.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was now and then well for Joe that I went thus provided. That badly
- garbed squire of good dame Fortune, who failed not of a profit at casino,
- had withal an overpowering taste to play faro; and as if by some law of
- compensation and to preserve an equilibrium, he would seem to sit down to
- a faro layout only to lose.
- </p>
- <p>
- Time and again he came to his rooms stripped of the last dollar. On these
- harrowing occasions Joe would borrow a round-number stake from me and so
- return to the legitimate sure harvests of casino, vowing never to lose
- himself and his money in any quicksands of farobank again.
- </p>
- <p>
- It must be admitted that these anti-faro vows were never kept; once firm
- on his feet by virtue of casino renewed, it was not over long ere he
- &ldquo;tried it just once more,&rdquo; to lose again. These faro bankruptcies would
- overtake Joe about once a month.
- </p>
- <p>
- One day I made a mild plot; I had foregone all hope of coaxing Joe&rsquo;s
- secret from him; now I resolved to bring against him the pressure of a
- small intrigue. I lay in ambush for Joe, waylaid him as it were in the
- weak hour of his destitution and ravished from him at the point of his
- necessities that which I could come by in no other way.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was following a disastrous night at faro when Joe appeared without so
- much silver in his pockets as might serve to keep the fiends from dancing
- there. Having related his losses he asked for the usual five hundred
- wherewith to re-enter the sure lists of casino and begin the combat anew.
- </p>
- <p>
- To his sore amazement and chagrin&mdash;and somewhat to his alarm, for at
- first he thought me as poor as himself from my refusal&mdash;I shook my
- sage young head.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Haven&rsquo;t you got it?&rdquo; asked Joe anxiously.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Oh, yes,&rdquo; I replied, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve got it; and it&rsquo;s yours on one condition. Teach
- me how to &lsquo;Tell the last four,&rsquo; and you may have five hundred and five
- hundred with it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then I pointed out to Joe his mean unfairness in not equipping me with
- this resistless knowledge. Save for that one pregnant secret I was as
- perfect at casino as any sharper on the Bowery. Likewise, were the
- situation reversed, I&rsquo;d be quick to instruct him. I&rsquo;d lend no more; there
- would come no further five hundred save as the price of that touchstone&mdash;the
- golden secret of how to &ldquo;Tell the last four.&rdquo; This I set forth jealously.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why, then,&rdquo; said Joe, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll do my best to teach you. But it will cost a
- deal of work. You&rsquo;ll have to put in hours of practice and curry and groom
- and train your memory as if it were a horse for a great race. I tell you
- the more readily&mdash;for I could elsewhere easily get the five hundred
- and for that matter five thousand other dollars to keep it company&mdash;since
- I believe I&rsquo;ve not many months to live at best&rdquo;&mdash;here, as if in
- confirmation, a gust of coughing shook him&mdash;&ldquo;and this secret shall be
- your legacy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- With these words, Joe got a deck of cards and began a game of casino with
- me as an adversary. Slowly playing the cards, he explained and strove to
- illustrate those mental methods by which he kept account and tabbed them
- as they were played. If I could lay bare this system here I would; but its
- very elaboration forbids. It was as though Joe owned a blackboard in his
- head with the fifty-two cards told off by numbers in column, and from
- which he erased a card the moment it appeared in play. By processes of
- elimination, he came finally to &ldquo;Tell the last four,&rdquo; and as the last
- hands were dealt knew those held by his opposite as much as ever he knew
- his own. This advantage, with even luck and perfect skill made him not to
- be conquered.
- </p>
- <p>
- It took many sittings with many lessons many hours long; but in time
- because of my young faculties&mdash;not too much cumbered of those
- thousand and one concerns to come with years and clamor for remembrance&mdash;I
- grew as perfect as Joe.
- </p>
- <p>
- And it was well I learned the secret when I did. Soon after, I became
- separated from Joe; I went southward to New Orleans and when I was next to
- New York Joe had disappeared. Nor could I find trace or sign of his
- whereabouts. He went in truth to his old village, and my earliest
- information thereof came only when the tavern host told the origin of the
- club-swinging ballet dancer then toeing it so gallantly on his gables.
- </p>
- <p>
- But while I parted with my friend, I never forgot him. The knowledge he
- gave double-armed me at the game. It became the reason of often riches in
- my hands, and was ever a resort when I erred over horse races or was
- beaten down by some storm of faro. Then it was profitably I recalled
- Casino Joe and his instructions; and his invincible secret of &ldquo;How to tell
- the last four.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Is it not strange,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, when the Red Nosed Gentleman
- had finished, &ldquo;that I who never cared to gamble, should listen with
- delight to a story of gamblers and gambling? But so it is; I&rsquo;ve heard
- scores such in my time and always with utmost zest. I&rsquo;ll even tell one
- myself&mdash;as it was told me&mdash;when it again becomes my duty to
- furnish this good company entertainment. Meanwhile, unless my memory
- fails, it should be the task of our descendant of Hiawatha&rdquo;&mdash;here the
- Jolly Doctor turned smilingly to Sioux Sam&mdash;&ldquo;to take up the burden of
- the evening.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The Old Cattleman, joining with the Jolly Doctor in the suggestion, and
- Sioux Sam being in no wise loth to be heard, our half-savage friend
- related &ldquo;How Moh-Kwa Fed the Catfish.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0015" id="link2HCH0015"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XV.&mdash;HOW MOH-KWA FED THE CATFISH.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">O</span>ne day Moh-Kwa,
- the Wise Bear, had a quarrel with Ish-koo-dah, the Fire. Moh-Kwa was gone
- from home two days, for Moh-Kwa had found a large patch of ripe
- blackberries, an&rsquo; he said it was prudent to stay an&rsquo; eat them all up lest
- some other man find them. So Moh-Kwa stayed; an&rsquo; though he ate very hard
- the whole time an&rsquo; never slept, so many an&rsquo; fat were the blackberries, it
- took two suns to eat them.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa came into his cavern, he found Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, grown
- small an&rsquo; hot an&rsquo; angry, for he had not been fed for two days. Moh-Kwa
- gave the Fire a bundle of dry wood to eat, an&rsquo; when the Fire&rsquo;s stomach was
- full an&rsquo; he had grown big an&rsquo; bright with plenty, he sat up on his bed of
- coals an&rsquo; found fault with Moh-Kwa for his neglect.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; should you neglect me again for two days,&rdquo; said the Fire, &ldquo;I will
- know I am not wanted an&rsquo; shall go away.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa was much tired with no sleep, so he answered Ish-koo-dah, the
- Fire, sharply.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You are always hungry,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa; &ldquo;also you are hard to suit. If I
- give you green wood, you will not eat it; if the wood be wet, you turn
- away. Nothing but old dry wood will you accept. Beggars like you should
- not own such fine tastes. An&rsquo; do you think, Fire, that I who have much to
- do an&rsquo; say an&rsquo; many places to go&mdash;I, Moh-Kwa, who am as busy as the
- bees in the Moon of Blossoms, have time to stay ever by your side to pass
- you new dry wood to eat? Go to; you are more trouble that a papoose!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, did not say anything to this, for the Fire&rsquo;s
- feelings were hurt; an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa who was heavy with his labors over the
- blackberries lay down an&rsquo; took a big sleep.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa awoke, he sat blinking in the darkness of his cavern, for
- Ish-koo-dah, while Moh-Kwa slept, had gone out an&rsquo; left night behind.
- </p>
- <p>
- For five days Moh-Kwa had no fire an&rsquo; it gave him a bad heart; for while
- Moh-Kwa could eat his food raw an&rsquo; never cared for that, he could not
- smoke his kinnikinick unless Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, was there to light his
- pipe for him.
- </p>
- <p>
- For five days Moh-Kwa smoked no kinnikinick; an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa got angry because
- of it an&rsquo; roared an&rsquo; shouted up an&rsquo; down the canyons, an&rsquo; to show he did
- not care, Moh-Kwa smashed his redstone pipe on a rock. But in his stomach
- Moh-Kwa cared, an&rsquo; would have traded Ish-koodah, the Fire, four armsful of
- dry cedar just to have him light his kinnikinick but once. But
- Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, was gone out an&rsquo; would not come back.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0011" id="linkimage-0011"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0239.jpg" alt="0239 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0239.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- Openhand, the good Sioux an&rsquo; great hunter, heard Moh-Kwa roaring for his
- kinnikinick. An&rsquo; Openhand told him he behaved badly, like a young squaw
- who wants new feathers an&rsquo; cannot get them. Then Openhand gave Moh-Kwa
- another pine, an&rsquo; brought the Fire from his own lodge; an&rsquo; again Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s
- cavern blazed with Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, in the middle of the floor, an&rsquo;
- Moh-Kwa smoked his kinnikinick. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s heart felt good an&rsquo; soft an&rsquo;
- pleasant like the sunset in the Moon of Fruit. Also, he gave Ish-koo-dah
- plenty of wood to eat an&rsquo; never scolded him for being always hungry.
- </p>
- <p>
- All the Sioux loved Openhand; for no one went by his lodge empty but
- Openhand gave him a piece of buffalo meat; an&rsquo; if a Sioux was cold, he put
- a blanket about his shoulders. An&rsquo; for this he was named &ldquo;Openhand,&rdquo; an&rsquo;
- the Sioux were never tired of talking good talk of Open-hand, an&rsquo; the
- noise of his praises never died out.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coldheart hated Openhand because he was so much loved. Coldheart was
- himself sulky an&rsquo; hard, an&rsquo; his hand was shut tight like a beaver-trap
- that is sprung, an&rsquo; it would not open to give anything away. Those who
- came hungry went hungry for all of Coldheart; an&rsquo; if they were cold, they
- were cold. Coldheart wrapped his robes the closer, an&rsquo; was the warmest
- whenever he thought the frost-wolf was gnawing others.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I do not rule the ice,&rdquo; said Coldheart; &ldquo;hunger does not come or go on
- its war-trail by my orders. An&rsquo; if the Sioux freeze or starve, an&rsquo;
- Pau-guk, the Death, walks among the lodges, it is because the time is
- Pau-guk&rsquo;s an&rsquo; I cannot help it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- So Coldheart kept his blankets an&rsquo; his buffalo meat for himself an&rsquo; his
- son, the Blackbird, an&rsquo; gave nothing away. An&rsquo; for these things, Coldheart
- was hated while Openhand was praised; an&rsquo; the breast of Coldheart was so
- eaten with his wrath against Openhand that it seemed as though
- Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, had gone into Coldheart&rsquo;s bosom an&rsquo; made a camp.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coldheart would have called Pau-guk to his elbow an&rsquo; killed Openhand; but
- Coldheart was not sure. The Openhand moved as quick as a fish in the
- Yellowstone, an&rsquo; stood as tall an&rsquo; strong as the big pine on the hill;
- there were no three warriors, the bravest of the Sioux, who could have
- gone on the trail of Openhand an&rsquo; shown his skelp on their return, for
- Openhand was a mighty fighter an&rsquo; had a big heart, so that even Fear
- himself was afraid of Openhand an&rsquo; never dared come where he was.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coldheart knew well that he could not fight with Openhand; for to find
- this out, he made his strongest medicine an&rsquo; called Jee-bi, the Spirit;
- an&rsquo; Jee-bi talked with Pau-guk, the Death, an&rsquo; asked Pau-guk if Coldheart
- went on the trail of Openhand to take his skelp, which one Pau-guk would
- have at the trail&rsquo;s end. An&rsquo; Pau-guk said he would have Coldheart, for
- Openhand would surely kill him. When Jee-bi, the Spirit, told Coldheart
- the word of Pau-guk, Coldheart saw then that he must go a new trail with
- his hate.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coldheart smoked an&rsquo; smoked many pipes; but the thoughts of Openhand an&rsquo;
- how he was loved by the Sioux made his kinnikinick bitter. Still Coldheart
- smoked; an&rsquo; at last the thought came that if he could not kill Openhand,
- he would kill the Young Wolf, who was Openhand&rsquo;s son. When this thought
- folded its wings an&rsquo; perched in the breast of Coldheart, he called for the
- evil Lynx, who was Coldheart&rsquo;s friend, an&rsquo; since he was the wickedest of
- the Sioux, would do what Coldheart said.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Lynx came an&rsquo; sat with Coldheart in his lodge; an&rsquo; the lodge was
- closed tight so that none might listen, an&rsquo; because it was cold. The
- Coldheart told the Lynx to go with his war-axe when the next sun was up
- an&rsquo; beat out the brains of the Young Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; when he is dead,&rdquo; said Coldheart, &ldquo;you must bring me the Young Wolf&rsquo;s
- heart to eat. Then I will have my revenge on Openhand, his father, whom I
- hate; an&rsquo; whenever I meet the Openhand I will laugh with the thought that
- I have eaten his son&rsquo;s heart.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But there was one who listened to Coldheart while he gave his orders to
- the evil Lynx, although she was no Sioux. This was the Widow of the Great
- Rattlesnake of the Rocks who had long before been slain by Yellow Face,
- his brother medicine. The Widow having hunted long an&rsquo; hard had crawled
- into the lodge of Cold-heart to warm herself while she rested. An&rsquo; as she
- slept beneath a buffalo robe, the noise of Coldheart talking to the evil
- Lynx woke the Widow up; an&rsquo; so she sat up under her buffalo robe an&rsquo; heard
- every word, for a squaw is always curious an&rsquo; would sooner hear new talk
- than find a string of beads.
- </p>
- <p>
- That night as Moh-Kwa smoked by Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, an&rsquo; fed him dry
- sticks so he would not leave him again, the Widow came an&rsquo; warmed herself
- by Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s side. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa asked the Widow how she fared; an&rsquo; the
- Widow while hungry said she was well, only that her heart was made heavy
- by the words of Coldheart. Then the Widow told Moh-Kwa what Coldheart had
- asked the evil Lynx to do, an&rsquo; how for his revenge against Openhand he
- would eat the Young Wolf&rsquo;s heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa listened to the Widow with his head on one side, for he would not
- lose a word; an&rsquo; when she had done, Moh-Kwa was so pleased that he put
- down his pipe an&rsquo; went to a nest which the owls had built on the side of
- the cavern an&rsquo; took down a young owl an&rsquo; gave it to the Widow to eat. An&rsquo;
- the Widow thanked Moh-Kwa an&rsquo; swallowed the little owl, while the old owl
- flew all about the cavern telling the other owls what Moh-Kwa had done.
- The owls were angry an&rsquo; shouted at Moh-Kwa.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The Catfish people said you were a Pawnee! But you are worse; you are a
- Shoshone, Moh-Kwa; yes, you are a Siwash! Bird-robber, little owl-killer,
- you an&rsquo; your Rattlesnake Widow are both Siwashes!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Kwa paid no heed; he did not like the owls, for they stole his
- meat; an&rsquo; when he would sleep, a company of the older owls would get
- together an&rsquo; hold a big talk that was like thunder in Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s cavern an&rsquo;
- kept him awake. Moh-Kwa said at last that if the owls called the Widow who
- was his guest a Siwash again, he would give her two more baby owls. With
- that the old owls perched on their points of rocks an&rsquo; were silent, for
- they feared Moh-Kwa an&rsquo; knew he was not their friend.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Widow had eaten her little owl, she curled up to sleep two weeks,
- for such was the Widow&rsquo;s habit when she had eaten enough. An&rsquo; as she
- snored pleasantly, feathers an&rsquo; owl-down were blown out through her nose,
- but the young owl was gone forever.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa left the Widow sleeping an&rsquo; went down the canyon in the morning to
- meet the evil Lynx where he knew he would pass close by the bank of the
- Yellowstone. An&rsquo; when Moh-Kwa saw the evil Lynx creeping along with his
- war-axe in his hand on the trail of the Young Wolf&rsquo;s heart, he gave a
- great shout: &ldquo;Ah! Lynx, I&rsquo;ve got you!&rdquo; An&rsquo; then he started for the Lynx
- with his paws spread. For Moh-Kwa loved the Open-hand, who brought back to
- him Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, when he had gone out of Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s cavern an&rsquo;
- would not return.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Kwa did not reach the Lynx, for up a tree swarmed the Lynx out of
- Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s reach.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa saw the evil Lynx hugging close to the tree, the new thought
- made Moh-Kwa laugh. An&rsquo; with that he reached up with his great arms an&rsquo;
- began to bend down the tree like a whip. When Moh-Kwa had bent the tree
- enough, he let it go free; an&rsquo; the tree sprang straight like an
- osage-orange bow. It was so swift an&rsquo; like a whip that the Lynx could not
- hold on, but went whirling out over the river like a wild duck when its
- wing is broken by an arrow; an&rsquo; then the Lynx splashed into the
- Yellowstone.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Lynx struck splashing into the Yellowstone, all the Catfish
- people rushed for him with the Big Chief of the Catfish at their head.
- Also, Ah-meek, the Beaver, was angry; for Ahmeek was crossing the
- Yellowstone with a bundle of bulrushes in his mouth to help build his
- winter house on the bank, an&rsquo; the Lynx struck so near to Ah-meek that the
- waves washed his face an&rsquo; whiskers, an&rsquo; he was startled an&rsquo; lost the
- bulrushes out of his mouth an&rsquo; they were washed away.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ah-meek who was angry, an&rsquo; the Catfish people who were hungry, charged on
- the Lynx; but the Lynx was not far enough from the shore for them, an&rsquo;
- while the Catfish people pinched him an&rsquo; Ah-meek, the Beaver, clawed him,
- the Lynx crawled out on the bank an&rsquo; was safe.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Ivwa met the Lynx when he crawled out of the Yellowstone looking
- like Dah-hin-dah, the Bull-frog, an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa picked him up with his paws
- to throw him back.
- </p>
- <p>
- But a second new thought came; an&rsquo; although the Catfish people screamed at
- him an&rsquo; Ah-meek who had lost his bulrushes was black with anger, Moh-Kwa
- did not throw the Lynx back into the river but stood him on his feet an&rsquo;
- told him what to do. An&rsquo; when Moh-Kwa gave him the orders, the Lynx
- promised to obey.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa killed a fawn; an&rsquo; the Lynx took its heart in his hand an&rsquo; went
- with it to Coldheart an&rsquo; said it was the heart of Young Wolf. An&rsquo;
- Coldheart roasted it an&rsquo; ate it, thinking it was Young Wolf&rsquo;s heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- For a day was the Coldheart glad, for he felt strong an&rsquo; warm with the
- thought that now he was revenged against Openhand; an&rsquo; Coldheart longed to
- tell Openhand that he had eaten his son&rsquo;s heart. But Coldheart was too
- wise to make this boast; he knew that Openhand whether with knife or lance
- or arrow would give him at once to Pau-guk, an&rsquo; that would end his
- revenge.
- </p>
- <p>
- Still Coldheart thought he would go to Open-hand&rsquo;s lodge an&rsquo; feed his eyes
- an&rsquo; ears with Open-hand&rsquo;s groans an&rsquo; mournings when now his son, the Young
- Wolf, was gone. But when Coldheart came to the lodge of Openhand, he was
- made sore to meet the Young Wolf who was starting forth to hunt. Coldheart
- spoke with the Young Wolf to make sure he had been cheated; an&rsquo; then he
- went back to kill the Lynx.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Coldheart was too late; the Lynx had not waited; now he was gone with
- his squaws an&rsquo; his ponies an&rsquo; his blankets to become a Pawnee. The Lynx
- was tired of being a Sioux.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Widow&rsquo;s sleep was out, Moh-Kwa sent her to hide in the lodge of
- Coldheart to hear what next he would plan. The Widow went gladly, for
- Moh-Kwa promised four more small young owls just out of the egg. The Widow
- lay under the buffalo robe an&rsquo; heard the words of Coldheart. In a week,
- she came back to Moh-Kwa an&rsquo; told him what Coldheart planned.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coldheart had sent twenty ponies to the Black-foot chief, Dull Knife,
- where he lived on the banks of the Little Bighorn. Also, Coldheart sent
- these words in the mouth of his runner:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;My son and the son of my enemy will come to your camp in one moon. You
- will marry the Rosebud, your daughter, to my son, while the son of my
- enemy you will tie an&rsquo; give to your young men to shoot at with their
- arrows until he be dead, an&rsquo; afterward until they have had enough sport.
- My son will bring you a white arrow; the son of my enemy will bring you a
- black arrow.&rdquo; Moh-Kwa laughed when he heard this from the Widow&rsquo;s lips;
- an&rsquo; because she had been faithful, Moh-Kwa gave her the four small owls
- just from the egg. An&rsquo; the older owls took it quietly an&rsquo; only whispered
- their anger; for Moh-Kwa said that if they screamed an&rsquo; shouted when now
- he must sit an&rsquo; think until his head ached, he would knock down every
- nest.
- </p>
- <p>
- When his plan was ripe, Coldheart put on a good face an&rsquo; went to the lodge
- of Openhand an&rsquo; gave him a red blanket an&rsquo; said he was Openhand&rsquo;s friend.
- An&rsquo; Openhand an&rsquo; all the Sioux said this must be true talk because of the
- red blanket; for Coldheart was never known to give anything away before.
- </p>
- <p>
- Openhand an&rsquo; Coldheart sat down an&rsquo; smoked; for Moh-Kwa had never told how
- Coldheart had sent the Lynx for the Young Wolf&rsquo;s heart. Moh-Kwa never told
- tales; moreover Moh-Kwa had also his own plans as well as Coldheart.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Openhand an&rsquo; Coldheart came to part, an&rsquo; Coldheart was to go again to
- his own lodge, he asked that Openhand send his son, Young Wolf, with the
- Blackbird who would go to wed the young squaw, Rosebud, where she dwelt
- with Dull Knife, her father, in their camp on the Little Bighorn. An&rsquo;
- Openhand did not hesitate, but said, &ldquo;Yes;&rdquo; an&rsquo; the Young Wolf himself was
- glad to go, like all boys who hope to see new scenes.
- </p>
- <p>
- As Young Wolf an&rsquo; the Blackbird next day rode away, Coldheart stuck a
- black arrow in the cow-skin quiver of Young Wolf, an&rsquo; a white arrow in
- that of the Blackbird, saying:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Give these to the Dull Knife that he may know you are my sons an&rsquo; come
- from me, an&rsquo; treat you with much love.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Many days the young men traveled to reach Dull Knife&rsquo;s camp on the Little
- Bighorn. In the night of their last camp, Moh-Kwa came silently, an&rsquo; while
- the young men slept swapped Coldheart&rsquo;s arrows; an&rsquo; when they rode to the
- lodge of Dull Knife, an&rsquo; while the scowling Blackfeet gathered about&mdash;for
- the sight of a Sioux gives a Blackfoot a hot heart&mdash;the black arrow
- was in the quiver of the Blackbird an&rsquo; the white arrow in that of Young
- Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How!&rdquo; said the young men to Dull Knife. &ldquo;How! how!&rdquo; said Dull Knife. &ldquo;An&rsquo;
- now, my sons, where are the arrows which are your countersigns?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- When the young men took out the arrows they saw that they had been
- changed; but they knew not their message an&rsquo; thought no difference would
- come. So they made no talk since that would lose time; an&rsquo; Young Wolf gave
- Dull Knife the white arrow while the Blackbird gave him the black arrow.
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; holding an arrow in each hand&mdash;one white, one black&mdash;Dull
- Knife said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;For the twenty ponies which we have got, the Blackfeet will carry forth
- the word of Cold-heart; for the Blackfeet keep their treaties, being
- honest men.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0012" id="linkimage-0012"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0251.jpg" alt="0251 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0251.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; so it turns that the Blackbird is shot full of arrows until he
- bristles like the quills on the back of Kagh, the Hedgepig. But Young Wolf
- is taken to the Rosebud, an&rsquo; they are married. The Young Wolf would have
- said: &ldquo;No!&rdquo; for he did not understand; but Dull Knife showed him first a
- war-axe an&rsquo; next the Rosebud. An&rsquo; the Rosebud was more beautiful in the
- eye of youth than any war-axe; besides Young Wolf was many days march from
- the lodge of his father, Openhand, an&rsquo; marriage is better than death.
- Thinking all of which, the Young Wolf did not say &ldquo;no&rdquo; but said &ldquo;yes,&rdquo; an&rsquo;
- at the wedding there was a great feast, for the Dull Knife was a big chief
- an&rsquo; rich.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ma-ma, the Woodpecker, stood on the top of a dead tree an&rsquo; saw the
- wedding; an&rsquo; when it was over, he flew straight an&rsquo; told Moh-Kwa so that
- Moh-Kwa might know.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Young Wolf an&rsquo; the Rosebud on their return were a day&rsquo;s ride from the
- Sioux, Moh-Kwa went to the lodge of Coldheart an&rsquo; said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Come, great plotter, an&rsquo; meet your son an&rsquo; his new squaw.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; Coldheart came because Moh-Kwa took him by his belts an&rsquo; ran with him;
- for Moh-Kwa was so big an&rsquo; strong he could run with a pony an&rsquo; its rider
- in his mouth.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa told Coldheart how the Blackbird gave Dull Knife the black arrow
- an&rsquo; was shot with all the arrows of five quivers. Coldheart groaned like
- the buffalo when he dies. Then Moh-Kwa showed him where Young Wolf came on
- with the beautiful Rosebud; and that he was followed by twenty pack-ponies
- which carried the presents of Dull Knife for his daughter an&rsquo; his new son.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; now,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;you have seen enough; for you have seen that you
- have made your foe happy an&rsquo; killed your own son. Also, I have cheated the
- Catfish people twice; once with the Big Medicine Elk an&rsquo; once with the
- Lynx, both of whom I gave to the Catfish people an&rsquo; took back. It is true,
- I have cheated the good Catfish folk who were once my friends, an&rsquo; now
- they speak hard of me an&rsquo; call me a &lsquo;Pawnee,&rsquo; the whole length of the
- Yellowstone from the Missouri to the Falls. However, Moh Kwa has something
- for the Catfish people this time which he will not take back, an&rsquo; by
- to-morrow&rsquo;s sun, the river will ring with Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s praises.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa carried Coldheart to the Yellowstone, an&rsquo; he sang an&rsquo; shouted for
- all the Catfish people to come. Then Moh-Kwa took Coldheart to a deep
- place in the river a long way from the bank. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa held Coldheart
- while the Chief of the Catfish got a strong hold, an&rsquo; his squaw&mdash;who
- was four times bigger than the Catfish Chief&mdash;got also a strong hold;
- an&rsquo; then what others of the Catfish people were there took their holds.
- When every catfish was ready Moh-Kwa let Coldheart slip from between his
- paws, an&rsquo; with a swish an&rsquo; a swirl, the Catfish people snatched Coldheart
- under the water an&rsquo; tore him to pieces. For many days the Yellowstone was
- bank-full of good words for Moh-Kwa; an&rsquo; all the Catfish people said he
- was a Sioux an&rsquo; no cheat of a Pawnee who gives only to take back.
- </p>
- <p>
- That night in his cavern Moh-Kwa sat by Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, an&rsquo; smoked
- an&rsquo; told the Widow the story, an&rsquo; how it all began by Openhand bringing
- the Fire back to be his friend when they had quarreled an&rsquo; the Fire had
- gone out an&rsquo; would not return. An&rsquo; while Moh-Kwa told the tale to the
- Widow, not an owl said a word or even whispered, but blinked in silence
- each on his perch; for the Widow seemed lean an&rsquo; slim as she lay by the
- fire an&rsquo; listened; an&rsquo; the owls thought it would be foolish to remind
- Moh-Kwa of their presence.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now, do you know,&rdquo; said the Red Nosed Gentleman, with his head on one
- side as one who would be deemed deeply the critic, &ldquo;these Indian stories
- are by no means bad.&rdquo; Then leaning across to the Old Cattleman, he asked:
- &ldquo;Does our Sioux friend make them up?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Them tales,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman, lighting a new cigar, &ldquo;is most
- likely as old as the Yellowstone itse&rsquo;f. The squaws an&rsquo; the old bucks tell
- &rsquo;em to the children, an&rsquo; so they gets passed along the line. Sioux
- Sam only repeats what he&rsquo;s done heard from his mother.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And now,&rdquo; remarked the Jolly Doctor, addressing the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;what
- say you? How about that story of the Customs concerning which you whetted
- our interest by giving us the name. It is strange, too, that while my
- interest is still as strong as ever, the name itself has clean slipped
- through the fingers of my memory.&rdquo; At this the Jolly Doctor glared about
- the circle as though in wonder at the phenomenon of an interest which
- remained when the reason of it had faded away.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I will willingly give you the story,&rdquo; said the Sour Gentleman. &ldquo;That name
- you search for is &lsquo;The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0016" id="link2HCH0016"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XVI.&mdash;THE EMPEROR&rsquo;S CIGARS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>t is not the blood
- which flows at the front, my friends, that is the worst of war; it is the
- money corruption that goes on at the rear. In old Sparta, theft was not
- theft unless discovered in process of accomplishment, and those larcenous
- morals taught of Lycurgus would seem, on the tails of our own civil war,
- to have found widest consent and adoption throughout every department of
- government. The public hour reeled with rottenness, and you may be very
- sure the New York Customs went as staggeringly corrupt as the rest.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is to my own proper shame that I should have fallen to have art or part
- or lot in such iniquities. Yet I went into them with open eyes and hands,
- and a heart&mdash;hungry as a pike&rsquo;s&mdash;for whatever of spoil chance or
- skilfully constructed opportunity might place within my reach. My sole
- defense, and that now sounds slight and trivial even to my partial ears,
- was the one I advanced the other day; my two-ply hatred of government both
- for injuries done my region of the South as well as the personal ruin
- visited on me when my ill-wishers struck down that enterprise of steamed
- tobacco which was making me rich. That is all I may urge in extenuation,
- and I concede its meager insufficiency.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I&rsquo;ve said, I obtained an appointment as an inspector of Customs, and
- afterward worked side by side, and I might add hand and glove, with our
- old friends, Quin and Lorns of the Story of the Smuggled Silks. That
- fearsome honest Chief Inspector who so put my heart to a trot had been
- dismissed&mdash;for some ill-timed integrity, I suppose&mdash;sharply in
- the wake of that day he frightened me; and when I took up life&rsquo;s burdens
- as an officer of the Customs, my companions, together with myself, were
- all black sheep together. Was there by any chance an honest man among us,
- he did not mention it, surely; nor did he lapse into act or deed that
- might have been evidence to prove him pure. Yes, forsooth! ignorance could
- be overlooked, drunkenness condoned, indolence reproved; but for that
- officer of our Customs who in those days was found honest, there shone no
- ray of hope. He was seized on and cast into outer unofficial darkness,
- there to exercise his dangerous probity in private life. There was no room
- for such among us; no peace nor safety for the rest while he remained.
- Wherefore, we of a proper blackness, were like so many descendants of
- Diogenes, forever searching among ourselves to find an honest man; but
- with fell purpose when discovered, of his destruction. We maintained a
- strictest quarantine against any infection of truth, and I positively
- believe, with such success, that it was excluded from our midst. That
- honest Chief Inspector was dismissed, I say; Lorns told me of it before
- I&rsquo;d been actively in place an hour, and the news gave me deepest
- satisfaction.
- </p>
- <p>
- That gentleman who was official head of the coterie of revenue hunters to
- which I was assigned was peculiarly the man unusual. His true name, if I
- ever heard it, I&rsquo;ve forgot; among us of the Customs, he was known as
- Betelnut Jack. Lorns took me into his presence and made us known to one
- another early in my revenue career. I had been told stories of this man by
- both Lorns and Quin. They deeply reverenced him for his virtues of courage
- and cunning, and the praises of Betelnut Jack were constant in their
- mouths.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack was at his home in the Bowery. Jack, in years gone by, had
- been a hardy member of one of those Volunteer fire companies which in that
- hour notably augmented the perils of an urban life. Jack was a doughty
- fighter, and with a speaking trump in one hand and a spanner-wrench in the
- other, had done deeds of daring whereof one might still hear the echo. And
- he became for these strong-hand reasons a tower of strength in politics;
- and obtained that eminence in the Customs which was his when first we met.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack received Lorns and myself in his dingy small coop of a
- parlor. He was unmarried&mdash;a popular theory in accounting for this
- being that he&rsquo;d been crossed in love in his youth. Besides the parlor,
- Jack&rsquo;s establishment contained only one room, a bedroom it was, a shadow
- larger than the bed.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack himself was wiry and dark, and with a face which, while
- showing marks of former wars, shone the seat of kindly good-humor.
- </p>
- <p>
- There had been an actor, Chanfrau, who played &ldquo;Mose, the Fireman.&rdquo;
- Betelnut Jack resembled in dress his Bowery brother of the stage. His
- soiled silk hat stood on a dresser. He wore a long skirted coat, a red
- shirt, a belt which upheld&mdash;in a manner so absent-minded that one
- feared for the consequences&mdash;his trousers; these latter garments in
- their terminations were tucked inside the gaudy tops of calfskin boots;
- small and wrinkleless these, and fitting like a glove, with the yellow
- seams of the soles each day carefully re-yellowed to the end that they be
- admired of men. Betelnut Jack&rsquo;s dark hair, a shade of gray streaking it in
- places, was crisp and wavy; and a long curl, carefully twisted and oiled,
- was brought down as low as the angle of his jaw just forward of each ear.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Be honest, young man!&rdquo; said Betelnut Jack, at the close of a lecture
- concerning my duties; &ldquo;be honest! But if you must take wrong money, take
- enough each time to pay for the loss of your job. Do you see this?&rdquo; And
- Jack&rsquo;s hand fell on a large morocco-bound copy of &ldquo;Josephus&rdquo; which lay on
- his table. &ldquo;Well, Lorns will tell you what stories I look for in that.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- And Lorns, as we came away, told me. Once a week it was the practice of
- each inspector to split off twenty per cent, of his pillage. He would,
- thus organized, pay a visit to his chief, the worthy Betel-nut Jack. As
- they gossiped, Jack&rsquo;s ever-ready hospitality would cause him to retire for
- a moment to the bedroom in search of a demijohn of personal whisky. While
- alone in the parlor, the visiting inspector would place his contribution
- between the leaves of &ldquo;Josephus,&rdquo; and thereby the humiliating, if not
- dangerous, passage of money from hand to hand was missed.
- </p>
- <p>
- There existed but one further trait of caretaking forethought belonging
- with the worthy Betelnut Jack. It would have come better had others of
- that crooked clique of customs copied Betelnut Jack in this last cautious
- characteristic. Justice is a tortoise, while rascality&rsquo;s a hare; yet
- justice though shod with lead wins ever the race at last. Betelnut Jack
- knew this; and while getting darkly rich with the others, he was always
- ready for the fall. While his comrades drove fast horses, or budded
- brown-stone fronts, or affected extravagant opera and supper afterward
- with those painted lilies, in whose society they delighted, Betelnut Jack
- clung to his old rude Bowery nest of sticks and straws and mud, and lived
- on without a change his Bowery life. He suffered no improvements whether
- of habit or of habitat, and provoked no question-asking by any gilded new
- prosperities of life.
- </p>
- <p>
- As fast as Betelnut Jack got money, he bought United States bonds. With
- each new thousand, he got a new bond, and tucked it safely away among its
- fellows. These pledges of government he kept packed in a small hand-bag;
- this stood at his bed&rsquo;s head, ready for instant flight with him. When the
- downfall did occur, as following sundry years of loot and customs pillage
- was the desperate case, Betelnut Jack with the earliest whisper of peril,
- stepped into his raiment and his calfskin boots, took up his satchel of
- bonds, and with over six hundred thousand dollars of those securities&mdash;enough
- to cushion and make pleasantly sure the balance of his days&mdash;saw the
- last of the Bowery, and was out of the country and into a corner of safety
- as fast as ship might swim.
- </p>
- <p>
- But now you grow impatient; you would hear in more of detail concerning
- what went forward behind the curtains of Customs in those later &rsquo;60&rsquo;s.
- For myself, I may tell of no great personal exploits. I did not remain
- long in revenue service; fear, rather than honesty, forced me to resign;
- and throughout that brief period of my office holding, youth and a lack of
- talent for practical iniquity prevented my main employment in those swart
- transactions which from time to time took place. I was liked, I was
- trusted; I knew what went forward and in the end I had my share of the ill
- profits; but the plans and, usually, the work came from others of a more
- subtile and experienced venality.
- </p>
- <p>
- In this affair of The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars, the story was this. I call them
- The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars because they were of a sort and quality made
- particularly for the then Imperial ruler of the French. They sold at
- retail for one dollar each, were worth, wholesale, seventy dollars a
- hundred, and our aggregate harvest of this one operation was, as I now
- remember, full sixty thousand dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- My first knowledge was when Lorns told me one evening of the seizure&mdash;by
- whom of our circle, and on what ship, I&rsquo;ve now forgotten&mdash;of one
- hundred thousand cigars. They were in proper boxes, concealed I never knew
- how, and captured in the very act of being smuggled and just as they came
- onto our wharf. In designating the seizure, and for reasons which I&rsquo;ve
- given before, they were at once dubbed and ever afterwards known among us
- as The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars.
- </p>
- <p>
- These one hundred thousand cigars were taken to the Customs Depot of
- confiscated goods. The owners, as was our rule, were frightened with black
- pictures of coming prison, and then liberated, never to be seen of us
- again. They were glad enough to win freedom without looking once behind to
- see what became of their captured property.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was one week later when a member of our ring, from poorest tobacco and
- by twenty different makers, caused one hundred thousand cigars, duplicates
- in size and appearance of those Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars, to be manufactured.
- These cost two and one-half cents each; a conscious difference, truly!
- between that and those seventy cents, the wholesale price of our spoil.
- Well, The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars were removed from their boxes and their
- aristocratic places filled by the worthless imitations we had provided.
- Then the boxes were again securely closed; and to look at them no one
- would suspect the important changes which had taken place within.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars once out of their two thousand boxes were carefully
- repacked in certain zinc-lined barrels, and reshipped as &ldquo;notions&rdquo; to
- Havana to one of our folk who went ahead of the consignment to receive
- them. In due course, and in two thousand proper new boxes they again
- appeared in the port of New York; this time they paid their honest duty.
- Also, they had a proper consignment, came to no interrupting griefs; and
- being quickly disposed of, wrought out for us that sixty thousand dollar
- betterment of which I&rsquo;ve spoken.
- </p>
- <p>
- As corollary of this particular informality of The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars, there
- occurred an incident which while grievous to the victims, made no little
- fun for us; its relation here may entertain you, and because of its
- natural connection with the main story, will come properly enough. At set
- intervals, the government held an auction of all confiscated goods. At
- these markets to which the public was invited to appear and bid, the
- government asserted nothing, guaranteed nothing. In disposing of such gear
- as these cigars, no box was opened; no goods displayed. One saw nothing
- but the cover, heard nothing but the surmise of an auctioneer, and
- thereupon, if impulse urged, bid what he pleased for a pig in a poke.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus it came to pass that on the occasion when The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars were
- held aloft for bids, the garrulous lecturer employed in selling the
- collected plunder of three confiscation months, took up one of the two
- thousand boxes as a sample, and said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I offer for sale a lot of two thousand packages, of which the one I hold
- in my hand is a specimen. Each package is supposed to contain fifty
- cigars. What am I bid for the lot? What offer do I hear?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That was the complete proffer as made by the government; for all that the
- bidding was briskly sharp. Those who had come to purchase were there for
- bargains not guarantees; moreover, there was the box; and could they not
- believe their experience? Each would-be bidder knew by the size and shape
- and character of the package that it was made for and should contain fifty
- cigars of the Emperor brand. Wherefore no one distrusted; the question of
- contents arose to no mind; and competition grew instant and close. Bid
- followed bid; five hundred dollars being the mark of each advance, as the
- noisy struggle between speculators for the lot&rsquo;s ownership proceeded.
- </p>
- <p>
- At last those celebrated marketeers, Grove and Filtord, received the lot&mdash;one
- hundred thousand of The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars&mdash;for forty-five thousand
- dollars. What thoughts may have come to them later, when they searched
- their bargain for its merits, I cannot say. Not one word of inquiry,
- condemnation or complaint came from Grove and Filtord. Whatever their
- discoveries, or whatever their deductions, they maintained a profound
- taciturnity. Probably they did not care to court the laughter of fellow
- dealers by disclosures of the trap into which they had so blindly bid
- their way. Surely, they must in its last chapters have been aware of the
- swindle! To have believed in the genuineness of the goods would have
- dissipated what remnant of good repute might still have clung to that last
- of the Napoleons who was their inventor, and justified the coming
- destruction of his throne and the birth of the republic which arose from
- its ruins. As I say, however, not one syllable of complaint came floating
- back from Grove and Filtord. They took their loss, and were dumb.
- </p>
- <p>
- My own pocket was joyfully gorged with much fat advantage of this iniquity&mdash;for
- inside we were like whalers, each having a prearranged per cent, of what
- oil was made, no one working for himself alone&mdash;long prior to that
- bidding which so smote on Grove and Filtord. The ring had no money
- interest in the confiscation sales; those proceeds went all to government.
- We divided the profits of our own disposal of the right true Emperor&rsquo;s
- Cigars on the occasion of their second appearance in port; and that
- business was ended and over and division done sundry weeks prior to the
- Grove and Filtord disaster.
- </p>
- <p>
- That is the story of The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars; there came still one little
- incident, however, which was doubtless the seed of those apprehensions
- which soon drove me to quit the Customs. I had carried his double tithes
- to Betelnut Jack. This was no more the work of policy than right. The
- substitution of the bogus wares, the reshipment to Cuba of The Emperor&rsquo;s
- Cigars, even the zinc-lined barrels, the repackage and second appearance
- and sale of our prizes, were one and all by direction of Betelnut Jack. He
- planned the campaign in each least particular. To him was the credit; and
- to him came the lion&rsquo;s share, as, in good sooth! it should if there be a
- shadow of that honor among rogues whereof the proverb tells.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the evening when I sought Betelnut Jack, we sat and chatted briefly of
- work at the wharfs. Not one word, mind you! escaped from either that might
- intimate aught of customs immorality. That would have been a gross breach
- of the etiquette understood by our flock of customs cormorants. No;
- Betelnut Jack and I confined discussion to transactions absolutely white;
- no other was so much as hinted at.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then came Betelnut Jack&rsquo;s proposal of his special Willow Run; he retired
- in quest of the demijohn; this was my cue to enrich &ldquo;Josephus,&rdquo; ready on
- the dwarf center table to receive the goods. My present to Betelnut Jack
- was five one-hundred-dol-lar bills.
- </p>
- <p>
- Somewhat in haste, I took these from my pocket and opened &ldquo;Josephus&rdquo; to
- lay them between the pages. Any place would do; Betelnut Jack would know
- how to discover the rich bookmark. As I parted the book, my eye was
- arrested by a sentence. As I&rsquo;ve asserted heretofore, I&rsquo;m not
- superstitious; yet that casual sentence seemed alive and to spring upon me
- from out &ldquo;Josephus&rdquo; as a threat:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And these men being thieves were destroyed by the King&rsquo;s laws; and their
- people rended their garments, put on sackcloth, and throwing ashes on
- their heads went about the streets, crying out.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That is what it said; and somehow it made my heart beat quick and little
- like a linnet&rsquo;s heart. I put in my contribution and closed the book. But
- the words clung to me like ivy; I couldn&rsquo;t free myself. In the end, they
- haunted me to my resignation; and while I remained long enough to share in
- the affair of the German Girl&rsquo;s Diamonds, and in that of the Filibusterer,
- when the hand of discovery fell upon Lorns and Quin, and others of my
- one-time comrades, I was far away, facing innocent, if sometimes
- dangerous, problems on our western plains.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;With a profound respect for you,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor to the Sour
- Gentleman when that raconteur had ended, &ldquo;and disavowing a least
- imputation personal to yourself, I must still say that I am amazed by the
- corruption which your tale discloses of things beyond our Customs doors.
- To be sure, you speak of years ago; and yet you leave one to wonder if the
- present be wholly free from taint.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It will be remarkable,&rdquo; returned the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;when any arm of
- government is exerted with entire integrity and no purpose save public
- good, and every thought of private gain eliminated. The world never has
- been so virtuous, nor is it like to become so in your time or mine.
- Government and those offices which, like the works of a watch, are made to
- constitute it, are the production of politics, and politics, mind you, is
- nothing save the collected and harmonised selfishness of men. The fruit is
- seldom better than the tree, and when a source is foul the stream will
- wear a stain.&rdquo; Here the Sour Gentleman sighed as though over the baseness
- of the human race.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;While there&rsquo;s to be no doubt,&rdquo; broke in the Red Nosed Gentleman,
- &ldquo;concerning the corruption existing in politics and the offices and office
- holders bred therefrom, I am free to say that I&rsquo;ve encountered as much
- blackness, and for myself I have been swindled oftener among merchants
- plying their reputable commerce of private scales and counters as in the
- administration of public affairs.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The Red Nosed Gentleman here looked about with a challenging eye as one
- who would note if his observation is to meet with contradiction. Finding
- none, he relapsed into silence and burgundy.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Speakin&rsquo; of politics,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman, who had listened to the
- others as though he found their discourse instructive, &ldquo;it&rsquo;s the one thing
- I&rsquo;ve seen mighty little of. The only occasion on which I finds myse&rsquo;f
- immersed in politics is doorin&rsquo; the brief sojourn I makes in Missouri, an&rsquo;
- when in common with all right-thinkin&rsquo; gents, I whirls in for Old
- Stewart.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Would you mind,&rdquo; remarked the Jolly Doctor in a manner so amiable it left
- one no power to resist, &ldquo;would you mind giving us a glimpse of that
- memorable campaign in which you bore doubtless no inconsiderable part? We
- should have time for it, before we retire.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which the part I bears,&rdquo; responded the Old Cattleman, &ldquo;wouldn&rsquo;t amount to
- the snappin&rsquo; of a cap. As to tellin&rsquo; you-all concernin&rsquo; said outburst of
- pop&rsquo;lar enthoosiasm for Old Stewart, I&rsquo;m plumb willin&rsquo; to go as far as you
- likes.&rdquo; Drawing his chair a bit closer to the fire and seeing to it that a
- glass of Scotch was within the radius of his reach, the Old Cattleman
- began.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0017" id="link2HCH0017"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XVII.&mdash;THE GREAT STEWART CAMPAIGN.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span>s I states, I
- saveys nothin&rsquo; personal of politics. Thar&rsquo;s mighty little politics gets
- brooited about Wolfville, an&rsquo; I ain&rsquo;t none shore but it&rsquo;s as well. The
- camp&rsquo;s most likely a heap peacefuller as a com-moonity. Shore, Colonel
- Sterett discusses politics in that Coyote paper he conducts; but none of
- it&rsquo;s nearer than Washin&rsquo;ton, an&rsquo; it all seems so plumb dreamy an&rsquo; far away
- that while it&rsquo;s interestin&rsquo;, it can&rsquo;t be regyarded as replete of the
- harrowin&rsquo; excitement that sedooces a public from its nacheral rest an&rsquo;
- causes it to set up nights an&rsquo; howl.
- </p>
- <p>
- Rummagin&rsquo; my mem&rsquo;ry, I never does hear any politics talked local but once,
- an&rsquo; that&rsquo;s by Dan Boggs. It&rsquo;s when the Colonel asks Dan to what party he
- adheres in principle&mdash;for thar ain&rsquo;t no real shore-enough party
- lurkin&rsquo; about in Arizona much, it bein&rsquo; a territory that a-way an&rsquo; mighty
- busy over enterprises more calc&rsquo;lated to pay&mdash;an&rsquo; Dan retorts that
- he&rsquo;s hooked up with no outfit none as yet, but stands ready as far as his
- sentiments is involved to go buttin&rsquo; into the first organization that&rsquo;ll
- cheapen nose-paint, &rsquo;liminate splits as a resk in faro-bank, an&rsquo;
- raise the price of beef. Further than them tenets, Dan allows he ain&rsquo;t got
- no principles.
- </p>
- <p>
- Man an&rsquo; boy I never witnesses any surplus of politics an&rsquo; party strife. In
- Tennessee when I&rsquo;m a child every decent gent has been brought up a Andy
- Jackson man, an&rsquo; so continyoos long after that heroic captain is petered.
- As you-all can imagine, politics onder sech conditions goes all one way
- like the currents of the Cumberland. Thar&rsquo;s no bicker, no strife, simply a
- vast Andy Jackson yooniformity.
- </p>
- <p>
- The few years I puts in about Arkansaw ain&rsquo;t much different. Leastwise
- we-all don&rsquo;t have issues; an&rsquo; what contests does arise is gen&rsquo;rally
- personal an&rsquo; of the kind where two gents enjoys a j&rsquo;int debate with their
- bowies or shows each other how wrong they be with a gun. An&rsquo; while
- politics of the variety I deescribes is thrillin&rsquo;, your caution rather
- than your intellects gets appealed to, while feuds is more apt to be their
- frootes than any draw-in&rsquo; of reg&rsquo;lar party lines. Wherefore I may say it&rsquo;s
- only doorin&rsquo; the one year I abides in Missouri when I experiences troo
- politics played with issues, candidates, mass-meetin&rsquo;s an&rsquo; barbecues.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myse&rsquo;f, my part is not spectacyoolar, bein&rsquo; I&rsquo;m new an&rsquo; raw an&rsquo; young;
- but I looks on with relish, an&rsquo; while I don&rsquo;t cut no hercoolean figger in
- the riot, I shore saveys as much about what&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; on as the best posted
- gent between the Ozarks an&rsquo; the Iowa line.
- </p>
- <p>
- What you-all might consider as the better element is painted up to beat
- Old Stewart who&rsquo;s out sloshin&rsquo; about demandin&rsquo; re-election to Jeff City
- for a second term. The better element says Old Stewart drinks. An&rsquo; this
- accoosation is doubtless troo a whole lot, for I&rsquo;m witness myse&rsquo;f to the
- following colloquy which takes place between Old Stewart an&rsquo; a jack-laig
- doctor he crosses up with in St. Joe. Old Stewart&rsquo;s jest come forth from
- the tavern, an&rsquo; bein&rsquo; on a joobilee the evenin&rsquo; before, is lookin&rsquo; an&rsquo;
- mighty likely feelin&rsquo; some seedy.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Doc,&rdquo; says Old Stewart, openin&rsquo; his mouth as wide as a young raven, an&rsquo;
- then shettin&rsquo; it ag&rsquo;in so&rsquo;s to continyoo his remarks, &ldquo;Doc, I wish you&rsquo;d
- peer into this funnel of mine.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then he opens his mouth ag&rsquo;in in the same egree-gious way, while the
- scientist addressed scouts about tharin with his eyes, plenty owley. At
- last the Doc shows symptoms of bein&rsquo; ready to report.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which I don&rsquo;t note nothin&rsquo; onusual, Gov&rsquo;nor, about that mouth,&rdquo; says the
- Doc, &ldquo;except it&rsquo;s a heap voloominous.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Don&rsquo;t you discern no signs or signal smokes of any foreign bodies?&rdquo; says
- Old Stewart, a bit pettish, same as if he can&rsquo;t onderstand sech blindness.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;None whatever!&rdquo; observes the Doc.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s shore strange,&rdquo; retorts Old Stewart, still in his complainin&rsquo; tones;
- &ldquo;thar&rsquo;s two hundred niggers, a brick house an&rsquo; a thousand acres of bottom
- land gone down that throat, an&rsquo; I sort o&rsquo; reckons some traces of &rsquo;em
- would show.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That&rsquo;s the trouble with Old Stewart from the immacyoolate standpint of the
- better classes; they says he overdrinks. But while it&rsquo;s convincin&rsquo; to
- sooperior folks an&rsquo; ones who&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to church an&rsquo; makin&rsquo; a speshulty of
- it, it don&rsquo;t sep&rsquo;rate Old Stewart from the warm affections of the rooder
- masses&mdash;the catfish an&rsquo; quinine aristocracy that dwells along the
- Missouri; they&rsquo;re out for him to the last sport.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Suppose the old Gov&rsquo;nor does drink,&rdquo; says one, &ldquo;what difference does that
- make? Now, if he&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to try sootes in co&rsquo;t, or assoome the pressure as
- a preacher, thar&rsquo;d be something in the bluff. But it don&rsquo;t cut no figger
- whether a gov&rsquo;nor is sober or no. All he has to do is pardon convicts an&rsquo;
- make notaries public, an&rsquo; no gent can absorb licker s&rsquo;fficient to
- incapac&rsquo;tate him for sech trivial dooties.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- One of the argyments they uses ag&rsquo;in Old Stewart is about a hawg-thief he
- pardons. Old Stewart is headin&rsquo; up for the state house one mornin&rsquo;, when
- he caroms on a passel of felons in striped clothes who&rsquo;s pesterin&rsquo; about
- the grounds, tittivatin&rsquo; up the scenery. Old Stewart pauses in front of
- one of &rsquo;em.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What be you-all in the pen&rsquo;tentiary for?&rdquo; says Old Stewart, an&rsquo; he&rsquo;s
- profoundly solemn.
- </p>
- <p>
- Tharupon the felon trails out on a yarn about how he&rsquo;s a innocent an&rsquo;
- oppressed person. He&rsquo;s that honest an&rsquo; upright&mdash;hear him relate the
- tale&mdash;that you&rsquo;d feel like apol&rsquo;gizin&rsquo;. Old Stewart listens to this
- victim of intrigues an&rsquo; outrages ontil he&rsquo;s through; then he goes
- romancin&rsquo; along to the next. Thar&rsquo;s five wronged gents in that striped
- outfit, five who&rsquo;s as free from moral taint or stain of crime as Dave
- Tutt&rsquo;s infant son, Enright Peets Tutt.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the sixth is different. He admits he&rsquo;s a miscreant an&rsquo; has done stole
- a hawg.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;However did you steal it, you scoundrel?&rdquo; demands Old Stewart.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;m outer meat,&rdquo; says the crim&rsquo;nal, &ldquo;an&rsquo; a band of pigs comes pi rootin&rsquo;
- about, an&rsquo; I nacherally takes my rifle an&rsquo; downs one.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Was it a valyooable hawg?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You-all can gamble it ain&rsquo;t no runt,&rdquo; retorts the crim&rsquo;nal. &ldquo;I shore
- ain&rsquo;t pickin&rsquo; out the worst, an&rsquo; I&rsquo;m as good a jedge of hawgs as ever eats
- corn pone an&rsquo; cracklin&rsquo;.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- At this Old Stewart falls into a foamin&rsquo; rage an&rsquo; turns on the two gyards
- who&rsquo;s soopervisin&rsquo; the captives.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Whatever do you-all mean,&rdquo; he roars, &ldquo;bringin&rsquo; this common an&rsquo; confessed
- hawg-thief out yere with these five honest men? Don&rsquo;t you know he&rsquo;ll
- corrupt &rsquo;em?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Tharupon Old Stewart reepairs to his rooms in the state house an&rsquo; pardons
- the hawg convict with the utmost fury.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; now, pull your freight,&rdquo; says Old Stewart, to the crim&rsquo;nal. &ldquo;If
- you&rsquo;re in Jeff City twenty-four hours from now I&rsquo;ll have you shot at
- sunrise. The idee of compellin&rsquo; five spotless gents to con-tinyoo in daily
- companionship with a low hawg-thief! I pardons you, not because you merits
- mercy, but to preserve the morals of our prison.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The better element concloods they&rsquo;ll take advantage of Old Stewart&rsquo;s
- willin&rsquo;ness for rum an&rsquo; make a example of him before the multitoode. They
- decides they&rsquo;ll construct the example at a monstrous meetin&rsquo; that&rsquo;s
- schedyooled for Hannibal, where Old Stewart an&rsquo; his opponent&mdash;who
- stands for the better element mighty excellent, seein&rsquo; he&rsquo;s worth about a
- million dollars with a home-camp in St. Looey, an&rsquo; never a idee above
- dollars an&rsquo; cents&mdash;is programmed for one of these yere j&rsquo;int debates,
- frequent in the politics of that era. The conspiracy is the more necessary
- as Old Stewart, mental, is so much swifter than the better element&rsquo;s
- candidate, that he goes by him like a antelope. Only two days prior at the
- town of Fulton, Old Stewart comes after the better element&rsquo;s candidate an&rsquo;
- gets enough of his hide, oratorical, to make a saddle-cover. The better
- element, alarmed for their gent, resolves on measures in Hannibal that&rsquo;s
- calc&rsquo;lated to redooce Old Stewart to a shorething. They don&rsquo;t aim to allow
- him to wallop their gent at the Hannibal meetin&rsquo; like he does in old
- Callaway. With that, they confides to a trio of Hannibal&rsquo;s sturdiest sots&mdash;all
- of &rsquo;em acquaintances an&rsquo; pards of Old Stewart&mdash;the sacred task
- of gettin&rsquo; that statesman too drunk to orate.
- </p>
- <p>
- This yere Hannibal barbecue, whereat Old Stewart&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to hold a
- open-air discussion with his aristocratic opponent, is set down for one in
- the afternoon. The three who&rsquo;s to throw Old Stewart with copious libations
- of strong drink, hunts that earnest person out as early as sun-up at the
- tavern. They invites him into the bar-room an&rsquo; bids the bar-keep set forth
- his nourishment.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gents, it works like a charm! All the mornin&rsquo;, Old Stewart swings an&rsquo;
- rattles with the plotters an&rsquo; goes drink for drink with &rsquo;em,
- holdin&rsquo; nothin&rsquo; back.
- </p>
- <p>
- For all that the plot falls down. When it&rsquo;s come the hour for Old Stewart
- to resort to the barbecue an&rsquo; assoome his share in the exercises, two of
- the Hannibal delegation is spread out cold an&rsquo; he&rsquo;pless in a r&rsquo;ar room,
- while Old Stewart is he&rsquo;pin&rsquo; the third&mdash;a gent of whom he&rsquo;s
- partic&rsquo;lar fond&mdash;upstairs to Old Stewart&rsquo;s room, where he lays him
- safe an&rsquo; serene on the blankets. Then Old Stewart takes another drink by
- himse&rsquo;f, an&rsquo; j&rsquo;ins his brave adherents at the picnic grounds. Old Stewart
- is never more loocid, an&rsquo; ag&rsquo;in he peels the pelt from the better
- element&rsquo;s candidate, an&rsquo; does it with graceful ease.
- </p>
- <p>
- Old Stewart, however, is regyarded as in peril of defeat. He&rsquo;s mighty weak
- in the big towns where the better element is entrenched, an&rsquo; churches grow
- as thick as blackberries. Even throughout the rooral regions, wherever a
- meetin&rsquo; house pokes up its spire, it&rsquo;s onderstood that Old Stewart&rsquo;s in a
- heap of danger.
- </p>
- <p>
- It ain&rsquo;t that Old Stewart is sech a apostle of nose-paint neither; it
- ain&rsquo;t whiskey that&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to kill him off at the ballot box. It&rsquo;s the
- fact that the better element&rsquo;s candidate&mdash;besides bein&rsquo; rich, which
- is allers a mark of virchoo to a troo believer&mdash;is a church member,
- an&rsquo; belongs to a congregation where he passes the plate, an&rsquo; stands high
- up in the papers. This makes the better element&rsquo;s gent a heap pop&rsquo;lar with
- church folk, while pore Old Stewart, who&rsquo;s a hopeless sinner, don&rsquo;t stand
- no show.
- </p>
- <p>
- This grows so manifest that even Old Stewart&rsquo;s most locoed supporters
- concedes that he&rsquo;s gone; an&rsquo; money is offered at three to one that the
- better element&rsquo;s entry will go over Old Stewart like a Joone rise over a
- tow-head. Old Stewart hears these yere misgivin&rsquo;s an&rsquo; bids his folks be of
- good cheer.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll fix that,&rdquo; says Old Stewart. &ldquo;By election day, my learned opponent
- will be in sech disrepoote with every church in Missouri he won&rsquo;t be able
- to get dost enough to one of &rsquo;em to give it a ripe peach.&rdquo; Old
- Stewart onpouches a roll which musters fifteen hundred dollars. &ldquo;That&rsquo;s
- mighty little; but it&rsquo;ll do the trick.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Old Stewart&rsquo;s folks is mystified; they can&rsquo;t make out how he&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to
- round up the congregations with so slim a workin&rsquo; cap&rsquo;tal. But they has
- faith in their chief; an&rsquo; his word goes for all they&rsquo;ve got. When he lets
- on he&rsquo;ll have the churches arrayed ag&rsquo;inst the foe, his warriors takes
- heart of grace an&rsquo; jumps into the collar an&rsquo; pulls like lions refreshed.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the fourth Sunday before election when Old Stewart, by speshul an&rsquo;
- trusted friends presents five hundred dollars each to a church in St.
- Looey, an&rsquo; another in St. Joe, an&rsquo; still another in Hannibal; said gifts
- bein&rsquo; in the name an&rsquo; with the compliments of his opponent an&rsquo; that gent&rsquo;s
- best wishes for the Christian cause.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thar&rsquo;s not a doubt raised; each church believes it-se&rsquo;f favored five
- hundred dollars&rsquo; worth from the kindly hand of the millionaire candidate,
- an&rsquo; the three pastors sits pleasantly down an&rsquo; writes that amazed sport a
- letter of thanks for his moonificence. He don&rsquo;t onderstand it none; but he
- decides it&rsquo;s wise to accept this accidental pop&rsquo;larity, an&rsquo; he waxes
- guileful an&rsquo; writes back an&rsquo; says that while he don&rsquo;t clearly onderstand,
- an&rsquo; no thanks is his doo, he&rsquo;s tickled to hear he&rsquo;s well bethought of by
- the good Christians of St. Looey, St. Joe an&rsquo; Hannibal, as expressed in
- them missives. The better element&rsquo;s candidate congratulates himse&rsquo;f on his
- good luck, stands pat, an&rsquo; accepts his onexpected wreaths. That&rsquo;s jest
- what Old Stewart, who is as cunnin&rsquo; as a fox, is aimin&rsquo; at.
- </p>
- <p>
- In two days the renown of them five-hundred-dollar gifts goes over the
- state like a cat over a back roof. In four days every church in the state
- hears of these largesses. An&rsquo; bein&rsquo; plumb alert financial, as churches
- ever is, each sacred outfit writes on to the better element&rsquo;s candidate
- an&rsquo; desires five hundred dollars of that onfortunate publicist. He gets
- sixty thousand letters in one week an&rsquo; each calls for five hundred.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gents, thar&rsquo;s no more to be said; the better element&rsquo;s candidate is up
- ag&rsquo;inst it. He can&rsquo;t yield to the fiscal demands, an&rsquo; it&rsquo;s too late to
- deny the gifts. Whereupon the other churches resents the favoritism he&rsquo;s
- displayed about the three in St. Looey, St. Joe an&rsquo; Hannibal. They
- regyards him as a hoss-thief for not rememberin&rsquo; them while his weaselskin
- is in his hand, an&rsquo; on election day they comes down on him like a pan of
- milk from a top shelf! You hear me, they shorely blots that onhap-py
- candidate off the face of the earth, an&rsquo; Old Stewart is Gov&rsquo;nor ag&rsquo;in.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the fourth evening of our companionship about the tavern fire, it was
- the Red Nosed Gentleman who took the lead with a story.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You spoke,&rdquo; said the Red Nosed Gentleman, addressing the Jolly Doctor,
- &ldquo;of having been told by a friend a story you gave us. Not long ago I was
- in the audience while an old actor recounted how he once went to the aid
- of an individual named Connelly. It was not a bad story, I thought; and if
- you like, I&rsquo;ll tell it to-night. The gray Thespian called his adventure
- The Rescue of Connelly, and these were his words as he related it. We were
- about a table in Browne&rsquo;s chop house when he told it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0018" id="link2HCH0018"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XVIII.&mdash;THE RESCUE OF CONNELLY.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">E</span>quipped as we are
- for the conquest of comfort with fresh pipes, full mugs, and the flavor of
- a best of suppers still extant within our mouths, it may be an
- impertinence for one to moralize. And yet, as I go forward to this
- incident, I will premise that, in every least exigency of life, ill begets
- ill, while good springs from good and follows the doer with a profit. Such
- has been my belief; such, indeed, has been my unbroken experience; and the
- misfortunes of Connelly, and my relief of them, small matters in
- themselves, are in proof of what I say.
- </p>
- <p>
- At sixty I look back with envy on that decade which followed my issuing
- forth from Trinity College, when, hopeless, careless, purposeless beyond
- the moment, I wandered the face of the earth and fed or starved at the
- hands of chance-born opportunity. I was up or down or rich or poor, and,
- with an existence which ran from wine to ditch water and back again to
- wine, was happy. I recall how in those days of checkered fortune, wherein
- there came a proportion of one hour of shadow to one moment of sun, I was
- wont to think on riches and their possession. I would say to myself: &ldquo;And
- should it so befall that I make my millions, I&rsquo;ll have none about me but
- broken folk: I&rsquo;ll refuse to so much as permit the acquaintance of a rich
- man.&rdquo; I&rsquo;ve been ever deeply controlled by the sentiment therein expressed.
- Sure it is, I&rsquo;ve been incapable of the example of the Levite, and could
- never keep to the other side of the way when distress appealed.
- </p>
- <p>
- My youth was wild, and staid folk called it &ldquo;vicious.&rdquo; I squandered my
- fortune; melted it, as August melteth ice, while still at Trinity. It was
- my misfortune to reach my majority before I reached my graduation, and
- those two college years which ensued after I might legally write myself
- &ldquo;man&rdquo; and the wild days that filled them up, brought me to face the world
- with no more shillings than might take me to Australia. However, they were
- gay though graceless times&mdash;those college years; and Dublin, from
- Smock Alley to Sackville Street, may still remember them.
- </p>
- <p>
- Those ten years after quitting Dublin were years of hit or miss. I did
- everything but preach or steal. Yes, I even fought three prize-fights; and
- there were warped, distorted moments when, bloody but victorious, I
- believed it better to be a fighter than to be a bishop.
- </p>
- <p>
- But for the main, I drifted to the theaters and lived by the drama.
- Doubtless I was a wretched actor&mdash;albeit I felt myself a Kemble&mdash;but
- the stage was so far good to me it finally brought me&mdash;as an
- underling of much inconsequence&mdash;to the fair city of New York. I did
- but little for the drama, but it did much for me; it led me to America.
- And now that I&rsquo;ve come to New York in this story, I&rsquo;ve come to Connelly.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mayhap I had been in New York three weeks. It was a chill night in April,
- and I was going down Broadway and thinking on bed; for, having done
- nothing all day save run about, I was very tired. It was under the lamps
- at the corner of Twenty-ninth Street, that I first beheld Connelly. Thin
- of face as of coat, he stood shivering in the keen air. There was
- something so beaten in the pose of the sorrowful figure that I was brought
- to a full stop.
- </p>
- <p>
- As strange to the land and its courtesies as I was to Connelly, I
- hesitated for a moment to speak. I was loth to be looked upon as one who,
- from a motive of curiosity, would insult another in bad luck. But I took
- courage from my virtue and at last made bold to accost him:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why do you stand shivering here?&rdquo; I said. &ldquo;Why don&rsquo;t you go home?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s a boarding-house,&rdquo; said Connelly. &ldquo;I owe the old lady thirty dollars
- and if I go back she&rsquo;ll hold me prisoner for it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then he told me his name, and that the trouble with him came from too much
- rum. Connelly had a Dublin accent and it won on me; moreover, I also had
- had troubles traceable to rum.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Come home,&rdquo; I said; &ldquo;you can&rsquo;t stand here all night. Come home; I&rsquo;ll go
- with you and have a talk with the old lady myself. Perhaps I&rsquo;ll find a way
- to soften her or make her see reason.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;She&rsquo;s incapable of seeing reason,&rdquo; said Connelly; &ldquo;incapable of seeing
- anything save money. She understands nothing but gold. She&rsquo;ll hold me
- captive a week; then if I don&rsquo;t pay, she&rsquo;ll have me arrested. You don&rsquo;t
- know the &lsquo;old lady:&rsquo; she&rsquo;s a demon unless she&rsquo;s paid.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- However, I led Connelly over to Sixth Avenue and restored his optimism
- with strong drink. Then I bought a quart of whiskey; thus sustained,
- Connelly summoned courage and together we sought his quarters. In his
- little room we sat all night, discussing the whiskey and Dublin and
- Connelly&rsquo;s hard fate.
- </p>
- <p>
- With the morning I was presented to the &ldquo;old lady,&rdquo;&mdash;an honor to make
- one quake. When I reviewed her acrid features, I knew that Connelly was
- right. Nothing could move that stony heart but money. I put off,
- therefore, those gallantries and blandishments I might otherwise have
- introduced, and came at once to the question.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How much does Connelly owe?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thirty dollars!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The words were emphasized with a click of teeth that would have done
- credit to a rat-trap.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was a baleful gleam, too, in the jadestone eye. Clearly, Connelly
- had read the signs aright. He might regard himself as a prisoner until the
- &ldquo;old lady&rdquo; was paid.
- </p>
- <p>
- That iron landlady went away to her duties and I counted my fortunes. They
- assembled but twenty-four dollars&mdash;a slim force and not one wherewith
- to storm the citadel of Connelly&rsquo;s troubles. How should I augment my
- capital? I knew of but one quick method and that flowed with risks&mdash;it
- was the races.
- </p>
- <p>
- I turned naturally to the horses, for it was those continuous efforts
- which I put forth to name winners that had so dissipated my patrimony.
- About the time I might have selected a victor now and then, my wealth was
- departed away. It is always thus. Sinister yet satirical paradox! the best
- judges of racing have ever the least money!
- </p>
- <p>
- There was no new way open to me, however, in this instance of Connelly. I
- must pay his debt that day if I would redeem him from this Bastile of a
- boarding-house, and the races were my single chance. I explained to
- Connelly; obtained him the consolation of a second quart wherewith to cure
- the sharper cares of his bondage, and started for the race-course. I knew
- nothing of American horses and less of American tracks, but I held not
- back for that. In the transaction of a work of virtue I would trust to
- lucky stars.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I approached the race-course gates, my eyes were pleased with the
- vision of that excellent pugilist, Joe Coburn. I had known this unworthy
- in Melbourne; he had graced the ringside on those bustling occasions when
- I pulled shirt over head and held up my hands for the stakes and the honor
- of old Ireland. Grown too fat for fisticuffs, Coburn struggled with the
- races for his daily bread. As he was very wise of horses, and likewise
- very crooked, I bethought me that Coburn&rsquo;s advice might do me good. If
- there were a trap set, Coburn should know; and he might aid a former
- fellow-gladiator to have advantage thereof and show the road to riches.
- </p>
- <p>
- Are races ever crooked? Man! I whiles wonder at the age&rsquo;s ignorance!
- Crooked? Indubitably crooked. There was never rascal like your rascal of
- sport; there&rsquo;s that in the word to disintegrate integrity. I make no doubt
- it was thus in every time and clime and that even the Olympian games
- themselves were honeycombed with fraud, and the sacred Altis wherein they
- were celebrated a mere hotbed of robbery. However, to regather with the
- doubtful though sapient Coburn.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Who&rsquo;s to win the first race?&rdquo; I asked.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Play Blue Bells!&rdquo; and Coburn looked at me hard and as one who held
- mysterious knowledge.
- </p>
- <p>
- Blue Bells!&mdash;I put a cautious five-dollar piece on Blue Bells. I saw
- her at the start. Vilest of beasts, she never finished&mdash;never met my
- eye again. I asked someone what had become of her. He said that, taking
- advantage of sundry missing boards over on the back-stretch, Blue Bells
- had bolted and gone out through the fence. This may have been fact or it
- may have been sarcasmal fiction; the truth important is, I lost my wager.
- </p>
- <p>
- Still true to a first impression&mdash;though I confess to confidence a
- trifle shaken&mdash;I again sought Coburn.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That was a great tip you gave me!&rdquo; I said. &ldquo;That suggestion of Blue Bells
- was a marvel! What do you pick for the next?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Get Tambourine!&rdquo; retorted Coburn. &ldquo;It&rsquo;s a sure thing.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Another five I placed on Tambourine; not without misgivings. But what
- might I do better? My judgment was worthless where I did not know one
- horse from another. I might as well take Coburn&rsquo;s advice; the more since
- he went often wrong and might name a winner by mistake. Five, therefore,
- on Tambourine; and when he started my hopes and Connelly&mdash;whose
- consoling quart must be a pint by now&mdash;went with him.
- </p>
- <p>
- At the worst I may so far compliment Tambourine as to say that I saw him
- again. He finished far in the rear; but at least he had the honesty to go
- around the course. Yet it was five dollars lost. When Tambourine went back
- to his stable, my capital was reduced by half, and Connelly and liberty as
- far apart as when we started.
- </p>
- <p>
- Following the disaster of Tambourine I sought no more the Coburn. Clearly
- it was not that philosopher&rsquo;s afternoon for naming winners. Or if it were,
- he was keeping their names a secret.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus ruminating, I sat reading the race card, when of a blinking sudden my
- eye was caught by the words &ldquo;Bill Breen.&rdquo; The title seemed a suggestion.
- Bill Breen had been my roommate&mdash;my best friend in the days of old
- Trinity. I pondered the coincidence.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;If this Bill Breen,&rdquo; I reflected, &ldquo;is half as fast as my Bill Breen, he&rsquo;s
- fit to carry Cæsar and his fortunes.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The more I considered, the more I was impressed. It was like sinking in a
- quicksand. In the end I was caught. I waxed reckless and placed ten
- dollars&mdash;fairly my residue of riches&mdash;on Bill Breen in one of
- those old-fashioned French Mutual pools common of that hour; having done
- so, I crept away to a lonesome seat in the grandstand and trembled. It was
- now or never, and Bill Breen would race freighted with the fate of
- Connelly.
- </p>
- <p>
- About two seats to my right, and with no one between, sat a round, bloated
- body of a man. He looked so much like a pig that, had he been put in a
- sty, you would have had nothing save the fact that he wore a hat to
- distinguish him from the other inmates. And yet I could tell by the mien
- of him, and his airs of lofty isolation and superiority, that he knew all
- about a horse&mdash;knew so much more than common folk that he despised
- them and withdrew from their society. It was like tempting the skies to
- speak to him, so wrapped was he in the dignity of his vast knowledge, but
- my quaking solicitude over Bill Breen and the awful stakes he ran for in
- poor Connelly&rsquo;s evil case, emboldened me. With a look, deprecatory at once
- and apologetic, I turned to this oracle:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Do you know a horse named Bill Breen?&rdquo; I asked.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I do,&rdquo; he replied coldly. Then ungrammatically: &ldquo;That&rsquo;s him walking down
- the track to the scales for the &lsquo;jock&rsquo; to weigh in,&rdquo; and he pointed to a
- greyhound-shaped chestnut.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Can he race?&rdquo; I said, with a gingerly air of merest curiosity.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He can race, but he won&rsquo;t,&rdquo; and the swinish man twined the huge gold
- chain about his right fore-hoof. &ldquo;I lost fifty dollars on him Choosday.
- The horse can race, but he won&rsquo;t; he&rsquo;s crazy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He looks well,&rdquo; I observed timidly.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Sure! he looks well,&rdquo; assented the swinish one; &ldquo;but never mind his
- looks; he won&rsquo;t win.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then came the start and the horses got away on the first trial. They went
- off in a bunch, and it gave me some color of satisfaction to note Bill
- Breen well to the front.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He has a good start,&rdquo; I ventured.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Hang the start!&rdquo; derided the swinish one.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He won&rsquo;t win, I tell you; he&rsquo;ll go and jump over the fence and never come
- back.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As the horses went from the quarter to the half mile post, Bill Breen,
- running easily, was strongly in the lead and increasing. My blood began to
- tingle.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He&rsquo;s ahead at the half mile.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And what of it?&rdquo; retorted the swinish one, disgustedly. &ldquo;Now keep your
- eye on him. In ten seconds he&rsquo;ll fly up in the air and stay there. He
- won&rsquo;t win; the horse is crazy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As the field swung into the homestretch and each jockey picked his route
- for the run to the wire, Bill Breen was going like a bird, twenty yards to
- the good if a foot. The swinish one placed the heavy member that had been
- caressing the watch-chain on my shoulder. He did not wait for any comment
- from me.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Sit still,&rdquo; he howled; &ldquo;sit still. He won&rsquo;t win. If he can&rsquo;t lose any
- other way, he&rsquo;ll stop back beyant on the stretch and bite the boy off his
- back. That&rsquo;s what he&rsquo;ll do; he&rsquo;ll bite the jockey off his back.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- To this last assurance, delivered with a roar, I made no answer. The
- horses were coming like a whirlwind; riders lashing, nostrils straining.
- The roll of the hoofs put my heart to a sympathetic gallop. I could not
- have said a word if I had tried. With the grandstand in a tumult, the
- horses flashed under the wire, Bill Breen winner with a flourish by a
- dozen lengths.
- </p>
- <p>
- Connelly was saved.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the horses were being dismissed, and &ldquo;Bill Breen&rdquo; was hung from the
- judges&rsquo; stand as &ldquo;first,&rdquo; the swinish one contemplated me gravely and in
- silence.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Have you a ticket on him?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I have,&rdquo; I replied.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Then you&rsquo;ll win a million dollars.&rdquo; This with a toss as he arose to go.
- &ldquo;You&rsquo;ll win a million dollars. You&rsquo;re the only fool who has.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s like the stories you read. The swinish one was so nearly correct in
- his last remark that I found but two tickets besides my own on Bill Breen.
- It has the ring of fable, but I was richer by eleven hundred and
- thirty-two dollars when that race was over. Blue Bells and Tambourine were
- forgotten; Bill Breen had redeemed the day! It was pleasant when I had
- cashed my ticket to observe me go about recovering the lost Connelly.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now, there,&rdquo; cried the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;there is a story which tells of a
- joy your rich man never knows&mdash;the joy of being rescued from a money
- difficulty.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And do you think a rich man is for that unlucky?&rdquo; asked the Sour
- Gentleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Verily, do I,&rdquo; returned the Jolly Doctor, earnestly. &ldquo;I can conceive of
- nothing more dreary than endless riches&mdash;the wealth that is by the
- cradle&mdash;that from birth to death is as easy to one&rsquo;s hand as water.
- How should he know the sweet who has not known the bitter? Man! the thorn
- is ever the charm of the rose.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was discovered in the chat which followed the Red Nosed Gentleman&rsquo;s
- tale that Sioux Sam might properly be regarded as the one who should next
- take up the burden of the company&rsquo;s entertainment. It stood a gratifying
- characteristic of our comrade from the Yellowstone that he was not once
- found to dispute the common wish. He never proffered a story; but he
- promptly told one when asked to do so. He was taciturn, but he was no less
- ready for that, and the moment his name was called he proceeded with the
- fable of &ldquo;Moh-Kwa and the Three Gifts.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0019" id="link2HCH0019"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XIX.&mdash;MOH-KWA AND THE THREE GIFTS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>his is in the long
- time ago when the sun is younger an&rsquo; not so big an&rsquo; hot as now, an&rsquo;
- Kwa-Sind, the Strong Man, is a chief of the Upper Yellowstone Sioux. It is
- on a day in the Moon-of-the-first-frost an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is
- gathering black-berries an&rsquo; filling his mouth. As Moh-Kwa pulls the bush
- towards him, he pierces his paw with a great thorn so that it makes him
- howl an&rsquo; shout, for much is his rage an&rsquo; pain. Moh-Kwa cannot get the
- great thorn out; because Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s claws while sharp an&rsquo; strong are not
- fingers to pull out a thorn; an&rsquo; the more Moh-Kwa bites his paw to get at
- the thorn, the further he pushes it in. At last Moh-Kwa sits growling an&rsquo;
- looking at the thorn an&rsquo; wondering what he is to do.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0013" id="linkimage-0013"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0295.jpg" alt="0295 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0295.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- While Moh-Kwa is wondering an&rsquo; growling, there comes walking Shaw-shaw,
- the Swallow, who is a young man of the Sioux. The Swallow has a good
- heart; but his spirit is light an&rsquo; his nature as easily blown about on
- each new wind as a dead leaf. So the Sioux have no respect for the Swallow
- but laugh when he comes among them, an&rsquo; some even call him
- Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward, for they do not look close, an&rsquo; mistake
- lightness for fear.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Swallow came near, Moh-Kwa, still growling, held forth his paw
- an&rsquo; showed the Swallow how the thorn was buried in the big pad so that he
- could not bite it out an&rsquo; only made it go deeper. An&rsquo; with that the
- Swallow, who had a good heart, took Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s big paw between his knees
- an&rsquo; pulled out the great thorn; for the Swallow had fingers an&rsquo; not claws
- like Moh-Kwa, an&rsquo; the Swallow&rsquo;s fingers were deft an&rsquo; nimble to do any
- desired deed.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa felt the relief of that great thorn out of his paw, he was
- grateful to the Swallow an&rsquo; thought to do him a favor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You are laughed at,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa to the Swallow, &ldquo;because your spirit is
- light as dead leaves an&rsquo; too much blown about like a tumbleweed wasting
- its seeds in foolish travelings to go nowhere for no purpose so that only
- it goes. Your heart is good, but your work is of no consequence, an&rsquo; your
- name will win no respect; an&rsquo; with years you will be hated since you will
- do no great deeds. Already men call you Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward. I am
- Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear of the Yellowstone, an&rsquo; I would do you a favor for
- taking my paw an&rsquo; the thorn apart. But I cannot change your nature; only
- Pau-guk, the Death, can do that; an&rsquo; no man may touch Pau-guk an&rsquo; live.
- Yet for a favor I will give you three gifts, which if you keep safe will
- make you rich an&rsquo; strong an&rsquo; happy; an&rsquo; all men will love you an&rsquo; no
- longer think to call you Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa when he had ended this long talk, licked his paw where had been
- the great thorn, an&rsquo; now that the smart was gone an&rsquo; he could put his foot
- to the ground an&rsquo; not howl, he took the Swallow an&rsquo; carried him to his
- house in the rocks. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa gave the Swallow a knife, a necklace of
- bear-claws, an&rsquo; a buffalo robe.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;While you carry the knife,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;all men will respect an&rsquo; fear
- you an&rsquo; the squaws will cherish you in their hearts. While you wear the
- bear-claws, you will be brave an&rsquo; strong, an&rsquo; whatever you want you will
- get. As for the skin of the buffalo, it is big medicine, an&rsquo; if you sit
- upon it an&rsquo; wish, it will carry you wherever you ask to go.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Besides the knife, the bear-claws an&rsquo; the big medicine robe, Moh-Kwa gave
- the Swallow the thorn he had pulled from his foot, telling him to sew it
- in his moccasin, an&rsquo; when he was in trouble it would bring Moh-Kwa to him
- to be a help. Also, Moh-Kwa warned the Swallow to beware of a cunning
- squaw.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;For,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;your nature is light like dead leaves, an&rsquo; such as
- you seek ever to be a fool about a cunning squaw.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Swallow came again among the Sioux he wore the knife an&rsquo; the
- bear-claws that Moh-Kwa had given him; an&rsquo; in his lodge he spread the big
- medicine robe. An&rsquo; because of the knife an&rsquo; the bear-claws, the warriors
- respected an&rsquo; feared him, an&rsquo; the squaws loved him in their hearts an&rsquo;
- followed where he went with their eyes. Also, when he wanted anything, the
- Swallow ever got it; an&rsquo; as he was swift an&rsquo; ready to want things, the
- Swallow grew quickly rich among the Sioux, an&rsquo; his lodge was full of robes
- an&rsquo; furs an&rsquo; weapons an&rsquo; new dresses of skins an&rsquo; feathers, while more
- than fifty ponies ate the grass about it.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now, this made Kwa-Sind, the Strong Man, angry in his soul&rsquo;s soul; for
- Kwa-Sind was a mighty Sioux, an&rsquo; had killed a Pawnee for each of his
- fingers, an&rsquo; a Blackfoot an&rsquo; a Crow for each of his toes, an&rsquo; it made his
- breast sore to see the Swallow, who had been also called Shau-goh-dah-wah,
- the Coward, thought higher among the Sioux an&rsquo; be a richer man than
- himself. Yet Kwa-Sind was afraid to kill the Swallow lest the Sioux who
- now sung the Swallow&rsquo;s praises should rise against him for revenge.
- </p>
- <p>
- Kwa-Sind told his hate to Wah-bee-noh, who was a medicine man an&rsquo; juggler,
- an&rsquo; agreed that he would give Wah-bee-noh twenty ponies to make the
- Swallow again as he was so that the Sioux would laugh at him an&rsquo; call him
- Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward.
- </p>
- <p>
- Wah-bee-noh, the medicine man, was glad to hear the offer of Kwa-Sind, for
- he was a miser an&rsquo; thought only how he might add another pony to his herd.
- Wah-bee-noh told Kwa-Sind he would surely do as he asked, an&rsquo; that the
- Swallow within three moons would be despised among all the Sioux.
- </p>
- <p>
- Wah-bee-noh went to his lodge an&rsquo; made his strongest medicine an&rsquo; called
- Jee-bi, the Spirit. An&rsquo; Jee-bi, the Spirit, told Wah-bee-noh of the
- Swallow&rsquo;s knife an&rsquo; bear-claws an&rsquo; the medicine robe.
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; now Wah-bee-noh made a plan an&rsquo; gave it to his daughter who was called
- Oh-pee-chee, the Robin, to carry out; for the Robin was full of craft an&rsquo;
- cunning, an&rsquo; moreover, beautiful among the young girls of the Sioux.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Robin dressed herself until she was like the red bird; an&rsquo; then she
- walked up an&rsquo; down in front of the lodge of the Swallow. An&rsquo; when the
- Swallow saw her, his nature which was light as dead leaves at once became
- drawn to the Robin, an&rsquo; the Swallow laughed an&rsquo; made a place by his side
- for the Robin to sit down. With that the Robin came an&rsquo; sat by his side;
- an&rsquo; after a little she sang to him Ewah-yeah, the Sleep-song, an&rsquo; the
- Swallow was overcome; his eyes closed an&rsquo; slumber settled down upon him
- like a night-fog.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then the Robin stole the knife from its sheath an&rsquo; the bear-claws from
- about the neck of the Swallow; but the medicine robe the Robin could not
- get because the Swallow was asleep upon it, an&rsquo; if she pulled it from
- beneath him he would wake up.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Robin took the knife an&rsquo; the bear-claws an&rsquo; carried them to
- Wah-bee-noh, her father, who got twelve ponies from Kwa-Sind for them an&rsquo;
- added the ponies to his herd. An&rsquo; the heart of Wah-bee-noh danced the
- miser&rsquo;s dance of gain in his bosom from mere gladness; an&rsquo; because he
- would have eight more ponies from Kwa-Sind, he sent the Robin back to
- steal the medicine robe when the Swallow should wake up.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Robin went back, an&rsquo; finding the Swallow still asleep on the medicine
- robe, lay down by his side; an&rsquo; soon she too fell asleep, for the Robin
- was a very tired squaw since to be cunning an&rsquo; full of craft is hard work
- an&rsquo; soon wearies one.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Swallow woke up he missed his knife an&rsquo; bear-claws. Also, he
- remembered that Moh-Kwa had warned him for the lightness of his spirit to
- beware of a cunning squaw. When these thoughts came to the Swallow, an&rsquo;
- seeing the Robin still sleeping by his side, he knew well that she had
- stolen his knife an&rsquo; bear-claws.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now, the Swallow fell into a great anger an&rsquo; thought an&rsquo; thought what he
- should do to make the Robin return the knife an&rsquo; bear-claws she had
- stolen. Without them the Sioux would laugh at him an&rsquo; despise him as
- before, an&rsquo; many would again call him Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward, an&rsquo;
- the name bit into the Swallow&rsquo;s heart like a rattlesnake an&rsquo; poisoned it
- with much grief.
- </p>
- <p>
- While the Swallow thought an&rsquo; the Robin still lay sleeping, a plan came to
- him; an&rsquo; with that, the Swallow seeing he was with the Robin lying on the
- medicine robe, sat up an&rsquo; wished that both himself an&rsquo; the Robin were in a
- far land of rocks an&rsquo; sand where a great pack of wolves lived.
- </p>
- <p>
- Like the flash an&rsquo; the flight of an arrow, the Swallow with the Robin
- still asleep by his side, an&rsquo; with the medicine robe still beneath them on
- the ground, found himself in a desolate land of rocks an&rsquo; sands, an&rsquo; all
- about him came a band of wolves who yelped an&rsquo; showed their teeth with the
- hunger that gnawed their flanks.
- </p>
- <p>
- Because the wolves yelped, the Robin waked up; an&rsquo; when she saw their
- white teeth shining with hunger she fell down from a big fear an&rsquo; cried
- an&rsquo; twisted one hand with the other, thinking Pau-guk, the Death, was on
- his way to get her. The Robin wept an&rsquo; turned to the Swallow an&rsquo; begged
- him to put her back before the lodge of Wah-bee-noh, her father.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the Swallow, with the anger of him who is robbed, spoke hard words out
- of his mouth.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Give me back the knife an&rsquo; the bear-claws you have stolen. You are a bad
- squaw, full of cunning an&rsquo; very crafty; but here I shall keep you an&rsquo; feed
- you&mdash;legs an&rsquo; arms an&rsquo; head an&rsquo; body&mdash;to my wolf-friends who
- yelp an&rsquo; show their teeth out yonder, unless I have my knife an&rsquo;
- bear-claws again.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- This brought more fear on the Robin, an&rsquo; she felt that the Swallow&rsquo;s words
- were as a shout for Pau-guk, the Death, to make haste an&rsquo; claim her; yet
- her cunning was not stampeded but stood firm in her heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Robin said that the Swallow must give her time to grow calm an&rsquo; then
- she would find the knife an&rsquo; bear-claws for him. While the Swallow waited,
- the Robin still wept an&rsquo; sobbed for fear of the white teeth of the wolves
- who stood in a circle about them. But little by little, the crafty Robin
- turned her sobs softly into Ewah-yeah, the Sleep-song; an&rsquo; soon slumber
- again tied the hands an&rsquo; feet an&rsquo; stole the eyes of the Swallow.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now the Robin did not hesitate. She tore the big medicine robe from
- beneath the Swallow; throwing herself into its folds, the Robin wished
- herself again before Wah-bee-noh&rsquo;s lodge, an&rsquo; with that the robe rushed
- with her away across the skies like the swoop of a hawk. The Swallow was
- only awake in time to see the Robin go out of sight like a bee hunting its
- hive.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now the Swallow was so cast down with shame that he thought he would call
- Pau-guk, the Death, an&rsquo; give himself to the wolves who sat watching with
- their hungry eyes. But soon his heart came back, an&rsquo; his spirit which was
- light as dead leaves, stirred about hopefully in his bosom.
- </p>
- <p>
- While he considered what he should now do, helpless an&rsquo; hungry, in this
- desolate stretch of rocks an&rsquo; sand an&rsquo; no water, the thorn which had been
- in Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s paw pricked his foot where it lay sewed in his moccasin. With
- that the Swallow wished he might only see the Wise Bear to tell him his
- troubles.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the Swallow made this wish, an&rsquo; as if to answer it, he saw Moh-Kwa
- coming across the rocks an&rsquo; the sand. When the wolves saw Moh-Kwa, they
- gave a last howl an&rsquo; ran for their hiding places.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa himself said nothing when he came up, an&rsquo; the Swallow spoke not
- for shame but lay quiet while Moh-Kwa took him by the belt which was about
- his middle an&rsquo; throwing him over his shoulder as if the Swallow were a
- dead deer, galloped off like the wind for his own house.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa had reached his house, he gave the Swallow a piece of buffalo
- meat to eat. Then Moh-Kwa said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Because you would be a fool over a beautiful squaw who was cunning, you
- have lost my three gifts that were your fortune an&rsquo; good fame. Still,
- because you were only a fool, I will get them back for you. You must stay
- here, for you cannot help since your spirit is as light as dead leaves,
- an&rsquo; would not be steady for so long a trail an&rsquo; one which calls for so
- much care to follow.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Moh-Kwa went to the door of his house an&rsquo; called his three friends,
- Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, Sub-bee-kah-shee, the Spider, an&rsquo;
- Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly; an&rsquo; to these he said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Because you are great warriors an&rsquo; fear nothing in your hearts I have
- called you.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; at that, Wah-wah-tah-see, an&rsquo; Sub-bee-kah-shee, an&rsquo; Sug-gee-mah stood
- very straight an&rsquo; high, for being little men it made them proud because so
- big a bear as Moh-Kwa had called them to be his help.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To you, Sub-bee-kah-shee,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, turning to the Spider, &ldquo;I leave
- Kwa-Sind; to you, Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, falls the honor of slaying
- Wah-bee-noh, the bad medicine man; while unto you, Sug-gee-mah descends
- the hardest task, for you must fight a great battle with Nee-pah-win, the
- Sleep.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa gave his orders to his three friends; an&rsquo; with that
- Sub-bee-kah-shee, crept to the side of Kwa-Sind where he slept an&rsquo; bit him
- on the cheek; an&rsquo; Kwa-Sind turned first gray an&rsquo; then black with the
- spider&rsquo;s venom, an&rsquo; then died in the hands of Pau-guk, the Death, who had
- followed the Spider to Kwa-Sind&rsquo;s lodge.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0014" id="linkimage-0014"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0305.jpg" alt="0305 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0305.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- While this was going forward, Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, came as swift
- as wing could carry to the lodge where Wah-bee-noh was asleep rolled up in
- a bear-skin. Wah-bee-noh was happy, for with the big medicine robe which
- the Robin had brought him, he already had bought the eight further ponies
- from Kwa-Sind an&rsquo; they then grazed in Wah-bee-noh&rsquo;s herd. As Wah-bee-noh
- laughed in his sleep because he dreamed of the twenty ponies he had earned
- from Kwa-Sind, the Firefly stooped an&rsquo; stung him inside his mouth. An&rsquo; so
- perished Wah-bee-noh in a flame of fever, for the poison of
- Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, burns one to death like live coals.
- </p>
- <p>
- Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, found Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, holding the Robin
- fast. But Sug-gee-mah was stout, an&rsquo; he stooped an&rsquo; stung the Sleep so
- hard he let go of the Robin an&rsquo; stood up to fight.
- </p>
- <p>
- All night an&rsquo; all day an&rsquo; all night, an&rsquo; yet many days an&rsquo; nights, did
- Sug-gee-mah, the &lsquo;bold Mosquito, an&rsquo; Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, fight for the
- Robin. An&rsquo; whenever Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, would take the Robin in his
- arms, &lsquo;Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, would strike him with his little lance.
- For many days an&rsquo; nights did Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, hold Nee-pah-win,
- the Sleep, at bay; an&rsquo; in the end the Robin turned wild an&rsquo; crazy, for
- unless Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, takes each man an&rsquo; woman in his arms when
- the sun goes down it is as if they were bitten by the evil polecats who
- are rabid; an&rsquo; the men an&rsquo; women who are not held in the arms of
- Nee-pah-win go mad an&rsquo; rave like starved wolves till they die. An&rsquo; thus it
- was with the Robin. After many days an&rsquo; nights, Pau-guk, the Death, came
- for her also, an&rsquo; those three who had done evil to the Swallow were
- punished.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa, collecting the knife, the bear-claws an&rsquo; the big medicine robe
- from the lodge of Kwa-Sind, gave them to the Swallow again. This time the
- Swallow stood better guard, an&rsquo; no squaw, however cunning, might make a
- fool of him&mdash;though many tried&mdash;so he kept his knife, the
- bear-claws, an&rsquo; the big medicine robe these many years while he lived.
- </p>
- <p>
- As for Sub-bee-kah-shee, the Spider, an&rsquo; Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, an&rsquo;
- Sug-gee-mah, the brave Mosquito, Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, for a reward gave
- them an&rsquo; their countless squaws an&rsquo; papooses forever that fine swamp where
- Apuk-wah, the Bulrush, grows thick an&rsquo; green, an&rsquo; makes a best hunting
- grounds for the three little warriors who killed Kwa-Sind, Wah-bee-noh,
- an&rsquo; the Robin on that day when Moh-Kwa called them his enemies. An&rsquo; now
- when every man was at peace an&rsquo; happy, Moh-Kwa brought the Sioux together
- an&rsquo; re-named the Swallow &ldquo;Thorn-Puller;&rdquo; an&rsquo; by that name was he known
- till he died.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How many are there of these Sioux folk-lore tales?&rdquo; asked the Jolly
- Doctor of Sioux Sam.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How many leaves in June?&rdquo; asked Sioux Sam. &ldquo;If our Great Medicine&rdquo;&mdash;so
- he called the Jolly Doctor&mdash;&ldquo;were with the Dakotahs, the old men an&rsquo;
- the squaws would tell him a fresh one for every fresh hour of his life.
- There is no end.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- While the Jolly Doctor was reflecting on this reply, the Red Nosed
- Gentleman, raising his glass of burgundy to the Sour Gentleman who
- returned the compliment in whiskey, said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;My respects to you, sir; and may we hope you will now give us that
- adventure of The German Girl&rsquo;s Diamonds?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I shall have the utmost pleasure,&rdquo; responded the Sour Gentleman. &ldquo;You may
- not consider it of mighty value as a story, but perhaps as a chapter in
- former Custom&rsquo;s iniquity one may concede it a use.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0020" id="link2HCH0020"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XX.&mdash;THE GERMAN GIRL&rsquo;S DIAMONDS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>t cannot be said,
- my friends, that I liked my position in that sink of evil, the New York
- Customs. I was on good terms with my comrades, but I founded no
- friendships among them. It has been and still is a belief of mine, and one
- formed at an early age, that everybody wears suggestive resemblance to
- some bird or fish or beast. I&rsquo;ve seen a human serpent&rsquo;s face, triangular,
- poisonous, menacing with ophidian eyes; I&rsquo;ve seen a dove&rsquo;s face, soft,
- gentle, harmless, and with lips that cooed as they framed and uttered
- words. And there are faces to remind one of dogs, of sheep, of apes, of
- swine, of eagles, of pike&mdash;ravenous, wide-mouthed, swift. I&rsquo;ve even
- encountered a bear&rsquo;s face on Broadway&mdash;one full of a window-peering
- curiosity, yet showing a contented, sluggish sagacity withal. And every
- face about me in the Customs would carry out my theory. As I glanced from
- Lorns to Quin, and from Quin to another, and so to the last upon the list,
- I beheld reflected as in a glass, a hawk, or an owl, or a wolf, or a fox,
- or a ferret, or even a cat. But each rapacious; each stamped with the
- instinct of predation as though the word &ldquo;Wolf&rdquo; were written across his
- forehead. Even Betelnut Jack gave one the impression that belongs with
- some old, rusty black-eagle with worn and tumbled plumage. I took no joy
- of my comrades; saw no more of them than I might; despised my trade of
- land-pirate&mdash;for what better could it be called?&mdash;and following
- that warning from &ldquo;Josephus&rdquo; was ever haunted of a weird fear of what
- might come. Still, I remained and claimed my loot with the rest. And you
- ask why? When all is said, I was as voracious as the others; I clinked the
- coins in my pocket, and consoled myself against the foul character of such
- profits with that thought of Vespasian: &ldquo;The smell of all money is sweet.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Following my downfall of tobacco, I had given up my rich apartments in
- Twenty-second Street; and while I retained my membership, I went no more
- to the two or three clubs into which I&rsquo;d been received. In truth, these
- Custom House days I seldom strolled as far northward as Twenty-third
- Street; but taking a couple of moderate rooms to the south of Washington
- Square, I stuck to them or to the park in front as much as ever I might;
- passing a lonely life and meeting none I&rsquo;d known before.
- </p>
- <p>
- One sun-filled September afternoon, being free at that hour, I was
- occupying a bench in Washington Square, amusing my idleness with the
- shadows chequered across the walk by an overspreading tree. A sound caught
- my ear; I looked up to be mildly amazed by the appearance of Betelnut
- Jack. It was seldom my chief was found so far from his eyrie in the
- Bowery; evidently he was seeking me. His first words averred as much.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I was over to your rooms,&rdquo; remarked Betelnut Jack; &ldquo;they told me you were
- here.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then he gave me a pure Havana&mdash;for we of the Customs might smoke what
- cigars we would&mdash;lighted another and betook himself to a few moments
- of fragrant, wordless tranquility. I was aware, of course, that Betelnut
- Jack had a purpose in coming; but curiosity was never among my vices, and
- I did not ask his mission. With a feeling of indifference, I awaited its
- development in his own good way and time.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack was more apt to listen than talk; but upon this Washington
- Square afternoon, he so far departed those habits of taciturnity commonly
- his own as to furnish the weight of conversation. He did not hurry to his
- business, but rambled among a score of topics. He even described to me by
- what accident he arrived at his by-name of Betelnut Jack. He said he was a
- sailor in his youth. Then he related how he went on deep water ships to
- India and to the China seas; how he learned to chew betel from the
- Orientals; how after he came ashore he was still addicted to betel; how a
- physician, ignorant of betel and its crimson consequences, fell into vast
- excitement over what he concevied to be a perilous hemorrhage; and how
- before Jack could explain, seized on him and hurried him into a near-by
- drug shop. When he understood his mistake, the physician took it in
- dudgeon, and was inclined to blame Jack for those sanguinary yet
- fraudulent symptoms. One result of the adventure was to re-christen him
- &ldquo;Betelnut Jack,&rdquo; the name still sticking, albeit he had for long abandoned
- betel as a taste outgrown.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack continued touching his career in New York; always with
- caution, however, slurring some parts and jumping others; from which I
- argued that portions of my chief&rsquo;s story were made better by not being
- divulged. It occurred, too, as a deduction drawn from his confidences that
- Betelnut Jack had been valorous as a Know-Nothing; and he spoke with
- rapture of the great prize-fighter, Tom Hyer, who beat Yankee Sullivan;
- and then of the fistic virtues of the brave Bill Poole, coming near to
- tears as he set forth the latter&rsquo;s murder in Stanwix Hall.
- </p>
- <p>
- Also, I gathered that Betelnut Jack had been no laggard at hurling stones
- and smashing windows in the Astor Place riot of 1849.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And the soldiers killed one hundred and thirty-four,&rdquo; sighed Betelnut
- Jack, when describing the battle; &ldquo;and wounded four times as many more.
- And all, mind you! for a no-good English actor with an Irish name!&rdquo; This
- last in accents of profound disgust.
- </p>
- <p>
- In the end Betelnut Jack began to wax uneasy; it was apparent how he
- yearned for his nest in the familiar Bowery. With that he came bluntly to
- the purpose.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To-morrow, early,&rdquo; he said, &ldquo;take one of the women inspectors and go down
- to quarantine. Some time in the course of the day, the steamship
- &lsquo;Wolfgang,&rsquo; from Bremen, will arrive. Go aboard at once. In the second
- cabin you will find a tall, gray, old German; thin, with longish hair. He
- may have on dark goggles; if he hasn&rsquo;t, you will observe that he is blind
- of the right eye. His daughter, a girl of twenty-three, will be with him.
- Her hair will be done up in that heavy roll which hair-dressers call the
- &lsquo;waterfall,&rsquo; and hang in a silk close-meshed net low on her neck. Hidden
- in the girl&rsquo;s hair are diamonds of a Berlin value of over one hundred and
- twenty thousand dollars. You will search the old man, and have the woman
- inspector search the girl. Don&rsquo;t conduct yourselves as though you knew
- what you were looking for. Tell your assistant to find the girl&rsquo;s diamonds
- naturally; let her work to them by degrees, not swoop on them.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Betelnut Jack disposed himself for homeward flight. I asked how he
- became aware of the jewels and the place of their concealment.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Never mind that now,&rdquo; was his reply; &ldquo;you&rsquo;ll know later. But get the
- diamonds; they&rsquo;re there and you must not fail. I&rsquo;ve come for you, as
- you&rsquo;re more capable of doing the gentleman than some of the others, and
- this is a case where a dash of refinement won&rsquo;t hurt the trick.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- With that Betelnut Jack lounged over to Fourth Street and disappeared
- towards Broadway and the Bowery further east.
- </p>
- <p>
- Following my chief&rsquo;s departure, I continued in idle contemplation of the
- shadows. This occupation did not forbid a mental looking up and down of
- what would be my next day&rsquo;s work. The prospect was far from refreshing.
- When one is under thirty, a proposal to plunder a girl&mdash;a beautiful
- girl, doubtless&mdash;of her diamonds, does not appeal to one. There would
- be woe, tears, lamentations, misery with much wringing of hands. I began
- to call myself a villain.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then, as against her, and defensive of myself, I argued the outlaw
- character of the girl&rsquo;s work. Be she beautiful or be she favored ill,
- still she is breaking the law. It was our oath to seize the gems; whatever
- of later wrong was acted, at best or worst, it was no wrong done her. In
- truth! when she was at last left free and at liberty, she would be favored
- beyond her deserts; for those Customs laws which she was cheating spoke of
- grates and keys and bars and bolts.
- </p>
- <p>
- In this wise, and as much as might be, I comforted myself against the
- disgrace of an enterprise from which I naturally recoiled, hardening
- myself as to the poor girl marked to be our prey. I confess I gained no
- great success; say what I might, I contemned myself.
- </p>
- <p>
- While thus ruminating that dishonor into which I conceived myself to have
- fallen, I recalled a story written by Edgar Allen Poe. It is a sketch
- wherein a wicked man is ever followed and thwarted by one who lives his
- exact semblance in each line of face and form. This doppel-ganger, as the
- Germans name him, while the same with himself in appearance and dress, is
- his precise opposite in moral nature. This struggle between the haunted
- one and his weird, begins in boyhood and continues till middle age. At the
- last, frantic under a final opposition, the haunted one draws sword and
- slays his enemy. Too late, as he wipes the blood from his blade, he finds
- that he has killed his better self; too late he sees that from that time
- to the end, the present will have no hope, the future hold no heaven; that
- he must sink and sink and sink, until he is grasped by those hands
- outstretched of hell to forever have him for their horrid own. I wondered
- if I were not like that man unhappy; I asked if I did not, by these
- various defenses and apologies which I made ever for my wickedness, work
- towards the death of my better nature whose destruction when it did come
- would mean the departure forever of my soul&rsquo;s chance.
- </p>
- <p>
- I stood up and shook myself in a canine way. Decidedly, loneliness was
- making me morbid! However that may have been, I passed a far from happy
- afternoon.
- </p>
- <p>
- Fairly speaking, these contentions shook me somewhat in my resolves. There
- were moments when I determined to refuse my diamond-hunting commission and
- resign my place. I even settled the style of my resignation; it should be
- full of sarcasm.
- </p>
- <p>
- But alas! these white dreams faded; in the end I was ready to execute the
- orders of Betelnut Jack; and that which decided me was surely the weakest
- thought of all. Somehow, I had in my thoughts put down the coming German
- maiden as beautiful; Betelnut Jack had said her age was twenty-three,
- which helped me to this thought of girlish loveliness. Thus, my imaginings
- worked in favor of the girl.
- </p>
- <p>
- But next the thought fell blackly that she would some day&mdash;probably a
- near day&mdash;love some man unknown and marry him. Possibly this lover
- she already knew; perhaps he was here and she on her way to meet him! This
- will sound like jest; it will earn derision from healthful, balanced
- spirits; and yet I tell but the truth.
- </p>
- <p>
- I experienced a vague, resentful jealousy, hated this imagined lover of a
- girl I&rsquo;d never met, and waxed contemptuous of aught of leniency towards
- one or both. I would do as Betelnut Jack ordered; I would go down to
- quarantine on the morrow; and I would find the diamonds.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was late in the afternoon when with a woman assistant, I boarded the
- &ldquo;Wolfgang&rdquo; in the Narrows. My aged German was readily picked up; his
- daughter was with him. And her beauty was as I&rsquo;d painted on the canvas of
- my thoughts. Yet when I beheld the loveliness which should have melted me,
- I recalled that lover to whose arms she might be coming and was hardened
- beyond recall. I told the inspectress to take her into her private room
- and find the diamonds. With that, I turned my back and strolled to the
- forward deck. Even at that distance I heard the shriek of the girl when
- her treasure was discovered.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;There will be less for the lover!&rdquo; I thought.
- </p>
- <p>
- When my woman assistant&mdash;accomplice might be the truer term&mdash;joined
- me, she had the jewels. They were in a long eel-skin receptacle, sewed
- tightly, and had been secreted in the girl&rsquo;s hair as described by Betelnut
- Jack. I took the gems, and buttoning them in my coat, told my aide&mdash;who
- with a feminine fashion of bitterness seemed exultant over having deprived
- another of her gew-gaws&mdash;to arrest the girl, hold her until the boat
- docked, frighten her with tales of fetters and dungeons and clanging bars,
- and at the last to lose her on the wharf. It would be nine o&rsquo;clock of the
- night by then, and murk dark; this loss of her prisoner would seem to come
- honestly about.
- </p>
- <p>
- If I were making a romance, rather than bending to a relation of cold,
- gray, hard, untender facts, I would at this crisis defy Betelnut Jack,
- rescue the beautiful girl, restore her jewels, love her, win her, wed her,
- and with her true, dear arms about me, live happy ever after. As it was,
- however, I did nothing of that good sort. My aide obeyed directions in a
- mood at once thorough, blithe, and spiteful, and never more did I set eyes
- on the half-blind father or the tearful, pretty, poor victim of our
- diamond hunting. Lost in the crush and bustle of the wharf, they were
- never found, never looked for, and never rendered themselves.
- </p>
- <p>
- I had considered what profit from these jewels might accrue to the ring
- and the means by which it would be arrived at. I took it for granted that
- some substitutional arts&mdash;when paste would take the places of old
- mine gems&mdash;would be resorted to as in the excellent instance of The
- Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars. But Betelnut Jack shook his careful head; there would be
- no hokus-pokus of substitution; there were good reasons. Also, there was
- another way secure. If our profits were somewhat shaved, our safety would
- be augmented; and Betelnut Jack&rsquo;s watchword was &ldquo;Safety first!&rdquo; I was
- bound to acquiesce; I the more readily did so since, like Lorns and Quin,
- I had grown to perfect confidence in the plans of Betelnut Jack. However,
- when now I had brushed aside etiquette and broken the ice of the matter
- with my chief, I asked how he meant to manoeuver in the affair.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Wait!&rdquo; retorted Betelnut Jack, and that was the utmost he would say.
- </p>
- <p>
- In due time came the usual auction and the gems were sold. They were
- snapped up by a syndicate of wise folk of Maiden Lane who paid therefor
- into the hands of the government the even sum of one hundred thousand
- dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- Still I saw not how our ring would have advantage; no way could open for
- us to handle those one hundred thousand dollars in whole or in part. I was
- in error; a condition whereof I was soon to be made pleasantly aware.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the day following the sale, and while the price paid still slept
- unbanked in the Customs boxes of proof-steel, there came one to see our
- canny chief. It is useless to waste description on this man. Suffice it
- that he was in fact and in appearance as skulkingly the coward scoundrel
- as might anywhere be met. This creeping creature was shown into the
- private rooms of Betelnut Jack. A moment later, I was sent for.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack was occupying a chair; he wore an air of easy confidence;
- and over that, a sentiment of contempt for his visitor. This latter was
- posed in the middle of the room; and while an apprehension of impending
- evil showed on his face, he made cringing and deprecatory gestures with
- shoulders hunched and palms turned outward.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Sit down,&rdquo; observed Betelnut Jack, pushing a chair towards me. When I was
- seated, he spoke on. &ldquo;Since it was you who found the diamonds, I thought
- it right to have you present now. You asked me once how I knew in advance
- of those gems and their scheme of concealment. To-day you may learn. This
- is the gentleman who gave me the information. He did it to obtain the
- reward&mdash;to receive that great per cent, of the seizure&rsquo;s proceeds
- which is promised the informer by the law. His information was right; he
- is entitled to the reward. That is what he is here for; he has come to be
- paid.&rdquo; Then to the hangdog, cringing one: &ldquo;Pretty good day&rsquo;s work for you,
- eh? Over fifty thousand dollars for a little piece of information is stiff
- pay!&rdquo; The hangdog one bowed lower and a smirk of partial confidence began
- to broaden his face. &ldquo;And now you&rsquo;ve come for your money&mdash;fifty odd
- thousand!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;If you please, sir! yes, sir!&rdquo; More and wider smirks.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;All right!&rdquo; retorted Betelnut Jack. &ldquo;You shall have it, friend; but not
- now&mdash;not to-day.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Then when?&rdquo; and the smirk fled.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To-morrow,&rdquo; said Betelnut Jack. &ldquo;To-morrow, next day, any day in fact
- when you bring before me to be witnesses of the transaction the father,
- the sister, and your wife.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Across the face of the hangdog one spread a pallor that was as the
- whiteness of death. There burned the fires of a hot agony in his eyes as
- though a dirk had slowly pierced him. His voice fell in a husky whisper.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You would cheat me!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;No; I would do you perfect justice,&rdquo; replied Betelnut Jack. &ldquo;Not a
- splinter do you finger until you bring your people. Your wife and her
- sister and their father shall know this story, and stand here while the
- money is paid. Not a stiver else! Now, go!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack&rsquo;s tones were as remorseless as a storm; they offered nothing
- to hope; the hangdog one heard and crept away with a look on his face that
- was but ill to see. Once the door was closed behind him, Betelnut Jack
- turned with a cheerful gleam to me.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That ends him! It&rsquo;s as you guess. This informer is the son-in-law of the
- old German. He married the elder daughter. They came over four years ago
- and live in Hoboken. Then the father and the younger sister were to come.
- They put their whole fortune into the diamonds, aiming to cheat the
- Customs and manage a profit; and the girl wrote their plans and how they
- would hide the jewels to her sister. It was she who told her husband&mdash;this
- fellow who&rsquo;s just sneaked out. He came to me and betrayed them; he was
- willing to ruin the old man and the girl to win riches for himself. But
- he&rsquo;s gone; he&rsquo;ll not return; we&rsquo;ve seen and heard the last of them; one
- fears the jail, the other the wrath of his wife; and that&rsquo;s the end.&rdquo; Then
- Betelnut Jack, as he lighted a cigar, spoke the word which told to folk
- initiate of a division of spoil on the morrow. As I arose, he said: &ldquo;Ask
- Lorns to come here.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Well,&rdquo; remarked the Old Cattleman when the Sour Gentleman was done, &ldquo;I
- don&rsquo;t want to say nothin&rsquo; to discourage you-all, but if I&rsquo;d picked up your
- hand that time I wouldn&rsquo;t have played it. I shorely would have let that
- Dutch girl keep her beads. Didn&rsquo;t the thing ha&rsquo;nt you afterwards?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It gave me a deal of uneasiness,&rdquo; responded the Sour Gentleman. &ldquo;I am not
- proud of my performance. And yet, I don&rsquo;t see what else I might have done.
- Those diamonds were as good as in the hands of Betelnut Jack from the
- moment the skulking brother-in-law brought him the information.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s one relief,&rdquo; observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, &ldquo;to know how that
- scoundrel came off no richer by his treachery.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What I observes partic&rsquo;lar in the narration,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman, &ldquo;is
- how luck is the predominatin&rsquo; feacher throughout. The girl an&rsquo; her old pap
- has bad luck in losin&rsquo; the gewgaw&rsquo;s. You-all customs sharps has good luck
- in havin&rsquo; the news brought to your hand as to where them diamonds is hid,
- by a coyote whom you can bluff plumb outen the play at the finish. As for
- the coyote informer, why he has luck in bein&rsquo; allowed to live.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; speakin&rsquo; of luck, seein&rsquo; that in this yere story-tellin&rsquo; arrangement
- that seems to have grown up in our midst, I&rsquo;m the next chicken on the
- roost, I&rsquo;ll onfold to you gents concernin&rsquo; &lsquo;The Luck of Cold-sober
- Simms.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0021" id="link2HCH0021"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXI.&mdash;THE LUCK OF COLD-SOBER SIMMS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>hich this yere
- tale is mighty devious, not to say disjointed, because, d&rsquo;you see! from
- first to last, she&rsquo;s all the truth. Now, thar is folks sech as Injuns an&rsquo;
- them sagacious sports which we-all terms philosophers, who talks of truth
- bein&rsquo; straight. Injuns will say a liar has a forked tongue, while
- philosophers will speak of a straight ondeviatin&rsquo; narrative, meanin&rsquo;
- tharby to indooce you to regyard said story as the emanation of honesty in
- its every word. For myse&rsquo;f I don&rsquo;t subscribe none to these yere phrases.
- In my own experience it&rsquo;s the lies that runs in a straight line like a
- bullet, whereas the truth goes onder an&rsquo; over, an&rsquo; up an&rsquo; down, doubles
- an&rsquo; jumps sideways a dozen times before ever it finally finds its camp in
- what book-sharps call the &ldquo;climax.&rdquo; Which I says ag&rsquo;in that this tale,
- bein&rsquo; troo, has nacherally as many kinks in it as a new lariat.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bein&rsquo; thoughtful that a-way, an&rsquo; preyed on by a desire to back-track every
- fact to its fountain-head, meanwhile considerin&rsquo; how different the kyards
- would have fallen final if something prior had been done or left on done,
- has ever been my weakness. It&rsquo;s allers so with me. I can recall as a child
- how back in Tennessee I deevotes hours when fish-in&rsquo; or otherwise
- uselessly engaged, to wonderin&rsquo; whoever I&rsquo;d have been personal if my maw
- had died in her girlhood an&rsquo; pap had wedded someone else. It&rsquo;s plumb too
- many for me; an&rsquo; now an&rsquo; then when in a sperit of onusual cog&rsquo;tation, I
- ups an&rsquo; wonders where I&rsquo;d be if both my maw an&rsquo; pap had cashed in as
- colts, I&rsquo;d jest simply set down he&rsquo;pless, on-qualified to think at all.
- It&rsquo;s plain that in sech on-toward events as my two parents dyin&rsquo;, say, at
- the age of three, I sort o&rsquo; wouldn&rsquo;t have happened none. This yere solemn
- view never fails to give me the horrors.
- </p>
- <p>
- I fixes the time of this story easy as bein&rsquo; that eepock when Jim East an&rsquo;
- Bob Pierce is sheriffs of the Panhandle, with headquarters in Tascosa, an&rsquo;
- Bob Roberson is chief of the LIT ranch. These yere evidences of merit on
- the parts of them three gents has not, however, anything to do with how
- Cold-sober Simms gets rich at farobank; how two hold-ups plots to rob him;
- how he&rsquo;s saved by the inadvertent capture of a bob-cat who&rsquo;s strange to
- him entire; an&rsquo; how the two hold-ups in their chagrin over Cold-sober&rsquo;s
- escape an&rsquo; the mootual doubts it engenders, pulls on each other an&rsquo;
- relieves the Stranglers from the labor of stringin&rsquo; &rsquo;em to a
- cottonwood.
- </p>
- <p>
- These doin&rsquo;s whereof I gives you a rapid rehearsal, has their start when
- Old Scotty an&rsquo; Locoed Charlie gets drunk in Tascosa prior to startin&rsquo; west
- on their buckboard with the mailbags of the Lee-Scott ranch. Locoed
- Charlie an&rsquo; Old Scotty is drunk when they pulls out; Cold-sober Simms is
- with &rsquo;em as a passenger. At their night camp half way to the
- Lee-Scott, Locoed Charlie, whose head can&rsquo;t stand the strain of Jenkins&rsquo;
- nose-paint, makes war-medicine an&rsquo; lays for Old Scotty all spraddled out.
- As the upcome of these yere hostilities, Old Scotty confers a most
- elab&rsquo;rate beatin&rsquo; on Locoed Charlie; after which they-all cooks their
- grub, feeds, an&rsquo; goes to sleep.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Locoed Charlie don&rsquo;t go to sleep; he lays thar drunk an&rsquo; disgruntled
- an&rsquo; hungerin&rsquo; to play even. As a good revengeful scheme, Locoed Charlie
- allows he&rsquo;ll get up an&rsquo; secrete the mailbag, thinkin&rsquo; tharby to worry Old
- Scotty till he sweats blood. Locoed Charlie packs the mailbag over among
- some rocks which is thick grown with cedar bresh. When it comes sun-up an&rsquo;
- Locoed Charlie is sober an&rsquo; repents, an&rsquo; tells Old Scotty of his little
- game, neither he nor Scotty can find that mailbag nohow. Locoed Charlie
- shore hides her good.
- </p>
- <p>
- Locoed Charlie an&rsquo; Scotty don&rsquo;t dare go on without it, but stays an&rsquo;
- searches; Cold-sober Simms&mdash;who is given this yere nom-de-guerre, as
- Colonel Sterett terms it, because he&rsquo;s the only sport in the Panhandle who
- don&rsquo;t drink&mdash;stays with &rsquo;em to help on the hunt. At last,
- failin&rsquo; utter to discover the missin&rsquo; mail, Locoed Charlie an&rsquo; Old Scotty
- returns to Tascosa in fear an&rsquo; tremblin&rsquo;, not packin&rsquo; the nerve to face
- McAllister, who manages for the Lee-Scott, an&rsquo; inform him of the yoonique
- disposition they makes of his outfit&rsquo;s letters. This return to Tascosa is,
- after all, mere proodence, since McAllister is a mighty emotional manager,
- that a-way, an&rsquo; it&rsquo;s as good as even money he hangs both of them culprits
- in that first gust of enthoosiasm which would be shore to follow any
- explanation they can make. So they returns; an&rsquo; because he can&rsquo;t he&rsquo;p
- himse&rsquo;f none, bein&rsquo; he&rsquo;s only a passenger on that buckboard, Cold-sober
- Simms returns with &rsquo;em. No, the mailbag is found a week later by a
- Lee-Scott rider, an&rsquo; for the standin&rsquo; of Locoed Charlie an&rsquo; Scotty it&rsquo;s as
- well he does.
- </p>
- <p>
- Cold-sober is some sore at bein&rsquo; baffled in his trip to the Lee-Scott
- since he aims to go to work thar as a rider. To console himse&rsquo;f, he turns
- in an&rsquo; bucks a faro game that a brace of onknown black-laigs who shows in
- Tascosa from Fort Elliot the day prior, has onfurled in James&rsquo; s&rsquo;loon. As
- sometimes happens, Cold-sober plays in all brands an&rsquo; y&rsquo;earmarks of luck,
- an&rsquo; in four hours breaks the bank. It ain&rsquo;t overstrong, no sech
- institootion of finance in fact as Cherokee Hall&rsquo;s faro game in Wolfville,
- an&rsquo; when Cold-sober calls the last nine-king turn for one hundred, an&rsquo; has
- besides a hundred on the nine, coppered, an&rsquo; another hundred open on the
- king, tharby reapin&rsquo; six hundred dollars as the froots of said feat, the
- sharp who&rsquo;s deal-in&rsquo; turns up his box an&rsquo; tells Cold-sober to set in his
- chips to be cashed. Cold-sober sets &rsquo;em in; nine thousand five
- hundred dollars bein&rsquo; the roundup, an&rsquo; the dealer-sharp hands over the
- dinero. Then in a sperit of resentment the dealer-sharp picks up the
- faro-box an&rsquo; smashes it ag&rsquo;in the wall.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thar bein&rsquo; nothin&rsquo; left,&rdquo; he says to his fellow black-laig, who&rsquo;s settin&rsquo;
- in the look-out&rsquo;s chair, &ldquo;for you an&rsquo; me but to prance out an&rsquo; stand up a
- stage, we may as well dismiss that deal-box from our affairs. I knowed
- that box was a hoodoo ever since Black Morgan gets killed over it in
- Mobeetie; an&rsquo; so I tells you, but you-all wouldn&rsquo;t heed.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Cold-sober is shore elated about his luck; them nine thousand odd dollars
- is more wealth than he ever sees; an&rsquo; how to dispose of it, now he&rsquo;s got
- it, begins to bother Cold-sober a heap. One gent says, &ldquo;Hive it in
- Howard&rsquo;s Store!&rdquo; another su&rsquo;gests he leave it with old man Cohn; while
- still others agrees it&rsquo;s Cold-sober&rsquo;s dooty to blow it in.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which if I was you-all,&rdquo; says Johnny Cook of the LIT outfit, &ldquo;I&rsquo;d shore
- sally forth an&rsquo; buy nose-paint with that treasure while a peso remained.&rdquo;
- But Cold-sober turns down these divers proposals an&rsquo; allows he&rsquo;ll pack
- said roll in his pocket a whole lot, which he accordin&rsquo; does.
- </p>
- <p>
- Cold-sober hangs &rsquo;round Tascosa for mighty near a week,
- surrenderin&rsquo; all thought of gettin&rsquo; to the Lee-Scott ranch, feelin&rsquo; that
- he&rsquo;s now too rich to punch cattle. Doorin&rsquo; this season of idleness
- art&rsquo;ease, Cold-sober bunks in with a jimcrow English doctor who&rsquo;s got a &rsquo;doby
- in Tascosa an&rsquo; who calls himse&rsquo;f Chepp. He&rsquo;s a decent form of maverick,
- however, this yere Chepp, an&rsquo; him an&rsquo; Cold-sober becomes as thick as
- thieves.
- </p>
- <p>
- Cold-sober&rsquo;s stay with Chepp is brief as I states; in a week he gets
- restless ag&rsquo;in for work; whereupon he hooks up with Roberson, an&rsquo; goes
- p&rsquo;intin&rsquo; south across the Canadian on a L I T hoss to hold down one of
- that brand&rsquo;s sign-camps in Mitchell&rsquo;s canyon. It&rsquo;s only twenty miles, an&rsquo;
- lie&rsquo;s thar in half a day&mdash;him an&rsquo; Wat Peacock who&rsquo;s to be his mate.
- An&rsquo; Cold-sober packs with him that fortune of ninety-five hundred.
- </p>
- <p>
- The two black-laigs who&rsquo;s been depleted that away still hankers about
- Tascosa; but as mighty likely they don&rsquo;t own the riches to take &rsquo;em
- out o&rsquo; town, not much is thought. Nor does it ruffle the feathers of
- commoonal suspicion when the two disappears a few days after Cold-sober
- goes ridin&rsquo; away to assoome them LIT reesponsibilities in Mitchell&rsquo;s
- canyon. The public is too busy to bother itse&rsquo;f about &rsquo;em. It comes
- out later, however, that the goin&rsquo; of Cold-sober has everything to do with
- the exodus of them hold-ups, an&rsquo; that they&rsquo;ve been layin&rsquo; about since they
- loses their roll on a chance of get-tin&rsquo; it back. When Cold-sober p&rsquo;ints
- south for Mitchell&rsquo;s that time, it&rsquo;s as good as these outlaws asks. They
- figgers on trailin&rsquo; him to Mitchell&rsquo;s an&rsquo; hidin&rsquo; out ontil some hour when
- Peacock&rsquo;s off foolin&rsquo; about the range; when they argues Cold-sober would
- be plumb easy, an&rsquo; they&rsquo;ll kill an&rsquo; skelp him an&rsquo; clean him up for his
- money, an&rsquo; ride away.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;In fact,&rdquo; explains the one Cold-sober an&rsquo; Peacock finds alive, &ldquo;it&rsquo;s our
- idee that the killin&rsquo; an&rsquo; skelpin&rsquo; an&rsquo; pillagin&rsquo; of Cold-sober would get
- layed to Peacock, which would mean safety for us an&rsquo; at the same time be a
- jest on Peacock that would be plumb hard to beat.&rdquo; That was the plan of
- these outlaws; an&rsquo; the cause of its failure is the followin&rsquo; episode, to
- wit:
- </p>
- <p>
- It looks like this Doc Chepp is locoed to collect wild anamiles that
- a-way.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which I wants,&rdquo; says this shorthorn Chepp, &ldquo;a speciment of every sort o&rsquo;
- the fauna of these yere regions, savin&rsquo; an&rsquo; exceptin&rsquo; polecats. I knows
- enough of the latter pungent beast from an encounter I has with one, to
- form notions ag&rsquo;in &rsquo;em over which not even the anxious cry of
- science can preevail. Polecats is barred from my c&rsquo;llec-tions. But,&rdquo; an&rsquo;
- said Chepp imparts this last to Cold-sober as the latter starts for
- Mitchell&rsquo;s, &ldquo;if by any sleight or dexterity you-all accomplishes the
- capture of a bob-cat, bring the interestin&rsquo; creature to me at once. An&rsquo;
- bring him alive so I may observe an&rsquo; note his pecooliar traits.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the third mornin&rsquo; in Mitchell&rsquo;s when a bobcat is seen by Cold-sober
- an&rsquo; Peacock to go sa&rsquo;nter-in&rsquo; up the valley. Mebby this yere bob-cat&rsquo;s
- homeless; mebby he&rsquo;s a dissoloote bob-cat an&rsquo; has been out all night
- carousin&rsquo; with other bob-cats an&rsquo; is simply late gettin&rsquo; in; be the reason
- of his appearance what it may, Cold-sober remembers about Doc Chepp&rsquo;s wish
- to own a bob-cat, an&rsquo; him an&rsquo; Peacock lets go all holds, leaps for their
- ponies an&rsquo; gives chase. Thar&rsquo;s a scramblin&rsquo; run up the canyon; then
- Peacock gets his rope onto it, an&rsquo; next Cold-sober fastens with his rope,
- an&rsquo; you hear me, gents, between &rsquo;em they almost rends this yere
- onhappy bobcat in two. They pauses in time, however, an&rsquo; after a fearful
- struggle they succeeds in stuffin&rsquo; the bob-cat into Peacock&rsquo;s leather
- laiggin&rsquo;s, which the latter gent removes for that purpose. Bound hand an&rsquo;
- foot, an&rsquo; wropped in the laiggin&rsquo;s so tight he can hardly squawl, that
- bob-cat&rsquo;s put before Cold-sober on his saddle; an&rsquo; this bein&rsquo; fixed,
- Cold-sober heads for Tascosa to present him to his naturalist friend,
- Chepp, Peacock scamperin&rsquo; cheerfully along like a drunkard to a barbecue
- regyardin&rsquo; the racket as a ondeniable excuse for gettin&rsquo; soaked.
- </p>
- <p>
- This adventure of the bob-cat is the savin&rsquo; clause in the case of
- Cold-sober Simms. As the bobcat an&rsquo; him an&rsquo; Peacock rides away, them two
- malefactors is camped not five miles off, over by the Serrita la Cruz, an&rsquo;
- arrangin&rsquo; to go projectin&rsquo; &rsquo;round for Cold-sober an&rsquo; his
- ninety-five hundred that very evenin&rsquo;. In truth, they execootes their
- scheme; but only to find when they jumps his camp in Mitchell&rsquo;s that
- Cold-sober&rsquo;s done vamosed a whole lot.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s then trouble begins to gather for the two rustlers. The one who deals
- the game that time is so overcome by Cold-sober&rsquo;s absence, he peevishly
- puts it up that his pard gives Cold-sober warnin&rsquo; with the idee of later
- whackin&rsquo; up the roll with him by way of a reward for his virchoo.
- Nacherally no se&rsquo;f-respectin&rsquo; miscreant will submit to sech impeachments,
- an&rsquo; the accoosed makes a heated retort, punctuatin&rsquo; his observations with
- his gun. Thar-upon the other proceeds to voice his feelin&rsquo;s with his
- six-shooter; an&rsquo; the mootual remarks of these yere dispootants is so well
- aimed an&rsquo; ackerate that next evenin&rsquo; when Cold-sober an&rsquo; Peacock returns,
- they finds one dead an&rsquo; t&rsquo;other dyin&rsquo; with even an&rsquo; exact jestice broodin&rsquo;
- over all.
- </p>
- <p>
- As Cold-sober an&rsquo; Peacock is settin&rsquo; by their fire that night, restin&rsquo;
- from their labors in plantin&rsquo; the two hold-ups, Cold-sober starts up
- sudden an&rsquo; says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Yereafter I adopts a bob-cat for my coat-o&rsquo;-arms. Also, I changes my mind
- about Howard, an&rsquo; to-morry I&rsquo;ll go chargin&rsquo; into Tascosa an&rsquo; leave said
- ninety-five hundred in his iron box. Thar&rsquo;s more &lsquo;bad men&rsquo; at Fort Elliot
- than them two we plants, an&rsquo; mebby some more of &rsquo;em may come
- a-weavin&rsquo; up the Canadian with me an&rsquo; my wealth as their objective p&rsquo;int.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Peacock endorses the notion enthoosiastic, an&rsquo; declar&rsquo;s himse&rsquo;f in on the
- play as a body-guard; for he sees in this yere second expedition a new
- o&rsquo;casion for another drunk, an&rsquo; Peacock jest nacherally dotes on a
- debauch.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And what did your Cold-sober Simms,&rdquo; asked the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;finally
- do with his money? Did he go into the cattle business?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Never buys a hoof,&rdquo; returned the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;No, indeed; he loses it
- ag&rsquo;in monte in Kelly&rsquo;s s&rsquo;loon in Dodge. Charley Bassett who&rsquo;s marshal at
- the time tries to git Cold-sober to pass up that monte game. But thar
- ain&rsquo;t no headin&rsquo; him; he would buck it, an&rsquo; so the sharp who&rsquo;s deal-in&rsquo;,
- Butcher Knife Bill it is&mdash;turns in an&rsquo; knocks Cold-sober&rsquo;s horns
- plumb off.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The sudden collapse of the volatile Cold-sober&rsquo;s fortunes was quite a
- dampener to the Sour Gentleman; he evidently entertained a hope that the
- lucky cow-boy was fated to a rise in life. The news of his final losses
- had less effect on the Red Nosed Gentleman who, having witnessed no little
- gambling in his earlier years, seemed better prepared. In truth, a remark
- he let fall would show as much.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I was sure he would lose it,&rdquo; said the Red Nosed Gentleman. &ldquo;Men win
- money only to lose it to the first game they can find. However, to change
- the subject:&rdquo; Here the Red Nosed Gentleman beamed upon the Jolly Doctor.
- &ldquo;Sir, the hour is young. Can&rsquo;t you aid us to finish the evening with
- another story?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;There is one I might give you,&rdquo; responded the Jolly Doctor. &ldquo;It is of a
- horse-race like that Rescue of Connelly you related and was told me by an
- old friend and patient who I fear was a trifle wild as a youth. This is
- the story as set forth by himself, and for want of a more impressive
- title, we may call it &lsquo;How Prince Rupert Lost.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0022" id="link2HCH0022"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXII.&mdash;HOW PRINCE RUPERT LOST.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span>nd now I&rsquo;ll tell
- you how I once threw stones at Hartford and thereby gained queer money to
- carry me to the bedside of my mother at her death.
- </p>
- <p>
- My father, you should know, was a lawyer of eminence and wide practice at
- the New York bar. His income was magnificent; yet&mdash;thriftless and
- well living&mdash;he spent it with both hands. My mother, who took as
- little concern for the future as himself, aided pleasantly in scattering
- the dollars as fast as they were earned.
- </p>
- <p>
- With no original estate on either side, and not a shilling saved, it was
- to be expected that my father&rsquo;s death should leave us wanting a penny. I
- was twenty-two when the blow fell; he died stricken of an apoplexy, his
- full habit and want of physical exercise marking him to that malady as a
- certain prey.
- </p>
- <p>
- I well recall how this death came upon us as a bolt from the blue. And
- while his partner stood over our affairs like a brother, when the debts
- were paid there remained no more than would manage an annuity for my
- mother of some six hundred dollars. With that she retreated to Westchester
- and lived the little balance of her years with a maiden sister who owned a
- starved farm, all chequered of stone fences, in that region of
- breath-taking hills.
- </p>
- <p>
- It stood my misfortune that I was bred as the son of a wealthy man.
- Columbia was my school and the generosity of my father gilded those
- college days with an allowance of five thousand a year. I became
- proficient&mdash;like many another hare-brain&mdash;in everything save
- books, and was a notable guard on the University Eleven and pulled the bow
- oar in the University Eight. When I came from college the year before my
- father&rsquo;s death I could write myself adept of a score of sciences, each
- physical, not one of which might serve to bring a splinter of return&mdash;not
- one, indeed, that did not demand the possession of largest wealth in its
- pursuit. I was poor in that I did not have a dollar when brought to face
- the world; I was doubly poor with a training that had taught me to spend
- thousands. Therefore, during the eighteen years to succeed my father&rsquo;s
- going, was I tossed on the waves of existence like so much wreckage; and
- that I am not still so thrown about is the offspring of happy exigency
- rather than a condition due to wisdom of my own.
- </p>
- <p>
- My ship of money did not come in until after I&rsquo;d encountered my fortieth
- year. For those eighteen years next prior, if truth must out, I&rsquo;d picked
- up intermittent small money following the races. Turf interest of that day
- settled about such speedy ones as Goldsmith Maid, Lucy, Judge Fullerton
- and American Girl, while Budd Doble, Dan Mace and Jack Splan were more
- often in the papers than was the President. I followed the races, I say;
- sometimes I was flush of money, more often I was poor; but one way or
- another I clung to the skirts of the circuits and managed to live.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now, since age has come to my head and gold to my fingers, and I&rsquo;ve had
- time and the cooled blood wherewith to think, I&rsquo;ve laid my ill courses of
- those eighteen evil years to the doors of what vile ideals of life are
- taught in circles of our very rich. What is true now, was true then. Among
- our &ldquo;best people&rdquo;&mdash;if &ldquo;best&rdquo; be the word where &ldquo;worst&rdquo; might better
- fit the case&mdash;who is held up to youthful emulation? Is it the great
- lawyer, or writer, or preacher, or merchant, or man of medicine? Is it he
- of any trade or calling who stands usefully and profitably at the head of
- his fellows? Never; such gentry of decent effort and clean dollars to flow
- therefrom are not mentioned; or if they be, it is not for compliment and
- often with disdain.
- </p>
- <p>
- And who has honor in the social conventions of our American aristocrats?
- It is young A, who drives an automobile some eighty miles an hour; or
- young B, who sails a single-sticker until her canvas is blown from the
- bolt ropes; or young C, who rides like an Arab at polo; or young D, who
- drives farthest at golf; or young E, who is the headlong first in a paper
- chase. These be the ideals; these the promontories to steer by. Is it
- marvel then when a youth raised of those &ldquo;best circles&rdquo; falls out of his
- nest of money that he lies sprawling, unable to honestly aid himself? Is
- it strange that he afterward lives drunken and precariously and seldom in
- walks asking industry and hard work? His training has been to spend money,
- while his contempt was reserved for those who labored its honorable
- accumulation. Such wrong-taught creatures, bereft of bank accounts, are
- left to adopt the races, the gambling tables, or the wine trade; and with
- all my black wealth of experience, I sit unable to determine which is
- basest and most loathly of the three.
- </p>
- <p>
- During those eighteen roving, race-course years I saw my mother but
- seldom; and I never exposed to her my methods of life. I told her that I
- &ldquo;traveled;&rdquo; and she, good, innocent girl! gained from the phrase a cloudy
- notion that I went the trusted ambassador to various courts of trade of
- some great manufactory. I protected her from the truth to the end, and she
- died brightly confident that her son made a brilliant figure in the world.
- </p>
- <p>
- While on my ignoble wanderings I kept myself in touch with one whom I
- might trust, and who, dwelling near my mother, saw her day by day. He was
- ever in possession of my whereabouts. Her health was a bit perilous from
- heart troubles, and I, as much as I might, maintained arrangements to warn
- me should she turn seriously ill.
- </p>
- <p>
- At first I looked hourly for such notice; but as month after month went by
- and no bad tidings&mdash;nothing save word at intervals that she was
- passing her quiet, uneventful days in comfort, and as each occasional
- visit made to Westchester confirmed such news, my apprehension became
- dulled and dormant. It was a surprise then, and pierced me hideously, when
- I opened the message that told how her days were down to hours and she lay
- dying.
- </p>
- <p>
- The telegram reached me in Hartford. When I took it from the messenger&rsquo;s
- hand I was so poor I could not give him a dime for finding me; and as he
- had been to some detective pains in the business, he left with an ugly
- face as one cheated of appreciation. I could not help it; there dwelt not
- so much as one cheap copper in my pocket. Also, my clothes were none of
- the best; for I&rsquo;d been in ill fortune, and months of bankruptcy had dealt
- unkindly with my wardrobe. But there should be no such word as fail; I
- must find the money to go to her&mdash;find it even though it arrive on
- the tides of robbery.
- </p>
- <p>
- Luck came to me. Within the minute to follow the summons, and while the
- yellow message still fluttered between my fingers, I was hailed from
- across the street. The hail came from a certain coarse gentleman who
- seemed born to horse-races as to an heritage and was, withal, one of the
- few who reaped a harvest from them. This fortunate one was known to the
- guild as Sure-thing Pete.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was fairly early of the morning, eight o&rsquo;clock, and Surething Pete in
- the wake of his several morning drinks&mdash;he was a celebrated sot&mdash;was
- having his boots cleaned. It is a curious thing that half-drunken folk are
- prone to this improvement. That is why a boot-black&rsquo;s chair is found so
- frequently just outside the portals of a rum shop. The prospect of a seat
- allures your drunkard fresh from his latest drink; he may sit at secure
- ease and please his rum-contented fancy with a review of the passing
- crowds; also, the Italian digging and brushing about his soles gives an
- impression that he is subject of concern to some one and this nurses a
- sense of importance and comes as vague tickle to his vanity.
- </p>
- <p>
- Surething Pete, as related, was under the hands of a boot-black when I
- approached. He was much older than I and regarded me as a boy.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Broke, eh?&rdquo; said Surething Pete. His eye, though bleary, was keen. Then
- he tendered a quarter. &ldquo;Take this and go and eat. I&rsquo;ll wait for you here.
- Come back in fifteen minutes and I&rsquo;ll put you in line to make some money.
- I&rsquo;d give you more, but I&rsquo;m afraid you wouldn&rsquo;t return.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Make money! I bolted two eggs and a cup of coffee and was back in ten
- minutes. Surething&rsquo;s second shoe was receiving its last polish. He paid
- the artist, and then turning led me to a rear room of the nearby ginmill.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This is it,&rdquo; said Surething. His voice was rum-husky but he made himself
- clear. &ldquo;There&rsquo;s the special race between Prince Rupert and Creole Belle.
- You know about that?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Of course I knew. These cracks had been especially matched against each
- other. It would be a great contest; the odds were five to three on Prince
- Rupert; thousands were being wagered; the fraternity had talked of nothing
- else for three weeks. Of course I knew!
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Well,&rdquo; went on Surething, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve been put wrong, understand! I&rsquo;ve got my
- bundle on Creole Belle and stand to win a fortune if Prince Rupert is
- beaten. I supposed that I&rsquo;d got his driver fixed. I paid this crook a
- thousand cold and gave him tickets on Creole Belle which stand him to win
- five thousand more to throw the race. But now, with the race to be called
- at two o&rsquo;clock, I get it straight he&rsquo;s out to double-cross me. He&rsquo;ll drive
- Rupert to win; an&rsquo; if he does I&rsquo;m a gone fawnskin. But I&rsquo;ve thought of
- another trick.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then suddenly: &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll tell you what you do; get into this wagon outside and
- come with me.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- With the last word, Surething again headed for the street. We took a
- carriage that stood at the door. In thirty minutes we were on the Charter
- &lsquo;Oak track. At this early hour, we had the course to ourselves. Surething
- walked up the homestretch until we arrived at a point midway between the
- half mile post and the entrance to the stretch.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;See that tree?&rdquo; said Surething, and he pointed to a huge buttonwood&mdash;a
- native&mdash;that stood perhaps twenty feet inside the rail. &ldquo;Come over
- and take a look at it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The great buttonwood was hollow; or rather a half had been torn away by
- some storm. What remained, however, was growing green and strong and stood
- in such fashion towards the course that it offered a perfect hiding place.
- By lying close within the hollow one was screened from any who might drive
- along.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This is the proposition,&rdquo; continued Surething, when I had taken in the
- convenient buttonwood and its advantages. &ldquo;This Rupert can beat the Belle
- if he&rsquo;s driven. But he&rsquo;s as nervous as a girl. If a fly should light on
- him he&rsquo;d go ten feet in the air&mdash;understand? Here now is what I want
- of you. I&rsquo;ll tell you what you&rsquo;re to do; then I&rsquo;ll tell you what you&rsquo;re to
- get. I want you to plant yourself behind this tree&mdash;better come here
- as early as the noon hour. The track &rsquo;ll be clear and no one&rsquo;ll see
- you go under cover, understand! As I say, I want you to plant yourself in
- the sheltering hollow of this buttonwood. You ought to have three rocks&mdash;say
- as big as a guinea&rsquo;s egg&mdash;three stones, d&rsquo;ye see, &rsquo;cause the
- race is heats, best three in five. You must lay dead so no one&rsquo;ll get on.
- As Rupert and the Belle sweep &rsquo;round the curve for the stretch, you
- want to let &rsquo;em get a trifle past you. Then you&rsquo;re to step out and
- nail Rupert&mdash;he&rsquo;ll have the pole without a doubt&mdash;and nail
- Rupert, I say, with a rock. That&rsquo;ll settle him; he&rsquo;ll be up in the air
- like a swallow-bird. It&rsquo;ll give the Belle the heat.&rdquo; Having gotten thus
- far, Surething fell into a mighty fit of coughing; his face congested and
- his eyes rolled. For a moment I feared that apoplexy&mdash;my father&rsquo;s
- death&mdash;might take him in the midst of his hopeful enterprise and
- deprive me of this chance of riches. I was not a little relieved therefore
- when he somewhat recovered and went on: &ldquo;That trick&rsquo;s as safe as
- seven-up,&rdquo; continued Surething. &ldquo;You&rsquo;ll be alone up here, as everybody
- else will be down about the finish. The drivers, driving like mad, won&rsquo;t
- see you&mdash;won&rsquo;t see anything but their horses&rsquo; ears. You must get
- Rupert&mdash;get him three times&mdash;every time he comes&rsquo;round&mdash;understand?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- I understood.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Right you are,&rdquo; concluded Surething. &ldquo;And to make it worth your while,
- here are tickets on the Belle that call for five hundred dollars if she
- wins. And here&rsquo;s a dollar also for a drink and another feed to steady your
- wrists for the stonethrowing.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It will seem strange and may even attract resentment that I, a college
- graduate and come of good folk, should accept such commission from a felon
- like Surething Pete. All I say is that I did accept it; was glad to get
- it; and for two hours before the great contest between Prince Rupert and
- Creole Belle was called, I lay ensconced in my buttonwood ambush, armed of
- three stones like David without the sling, ready to play my part towards
- the acquirement of those promised hundreds. And with that, my thoughts
- were on my mother. The money would count handsomely to procure me proper
- clothes and take me home. To me the proposed bombardment of the nervous
- Rupert appeared an opportunity heaven-sent when my need was most.
- </p>
- <p>
- For fear of discovery and woe to follow, I put my tickets in the hands of
- one who, while as poor as I, could yet be trusted. He was, if the Belle
- won, to cash them; and should I be observed at my sleight of hand work and
- made to fly, he would meet me in a near-by village with the proceeds.
- </p>
- <p>
- At prompt two o&rsquo;clock the race was called. There were bustling crowds of
- spectators; but none came near my hiding place, as Surething Pete had
- foreseen. The horses got off with the second trial. They trotted as
- steadily as clockwork. As the pair rounded the second curve they were
- coming like the wind; drivers leaning far forward in their sulkies, eagle
- of glance, steady of rein, soothing with encouraging words, and &ldquo;sending
- them,&rdquo; as the phrase is, for every inch. It was a splendid race and
- splendidly driven, with Rupert on the pole and a half length to the good.
- They flashed by my post like twin meteors.
- </p>
- <p>
- As they passed I stepped free of my buttonwood; and then, as unerringly as
- one might send a bullet&mdash;for I had not been long enough from school
- to forget how to throw&mdash;my first pebble, full two ounces, caught the
- hurrying Rupert in mid-rib.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mighty were the results. Prince Rupert leaped into the air&mdash;stumbled&mdash;came
- almost to a halt&mdash;then into the air a second time&mdash;and following
- that, went galloping and pitching down the course, his driver sawing and
- whipping in distracted alternation. Meanwhile, Creole Belle slipped away
- like a spirit in harness and finished a wide winner. I took in results
- from my buttonwood. There was no untoward excitement about the grandstand
- or among the judges. Good; I was not suspected!
- </p>
- <p>
- There ensued a long wait; planted close to my tree I wearied with the
- aching length of it. Then Rupert and the Belle were on the track again.
- The gong sounded; I heard the word &ldquo;Go!&rdquo; even in my faraway hiding; the
- second heat was on. It was patterned of the first; the two took the curve
- and flew for the head of the stretch as they did before; Rupert on the
- pole and leading with half a length. I repeated the former success. The
- stone struck poor Rupert squarely. He shot straight toward the skies and
- all but fell in the sulky when he came down. It was near to ending
- matters; for Rupert regained his feet in scantiest time to get inside the
- distance flag before the Belle streamed under the wire.
- </p>
- <p>
- Creole Belle! two straight heats! What a row and a roar went up about the
- pools! What hedging was done! From five to three on Rupert the odds
- shifted to seven to two on Creole Belle. I could hear the riot and
- interpret it. I clung closely to the protecting buttonwood; there was
- still a last act before the play was done.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the third heat. The pace, comparatively, was neither hot nor hard;
- the previous exertions of both Rupert and the Belle had worn away the wire
- edge and abated their appetites for any utmost speed. Relatively, however,
- conditions were equal and each as tired as the other; and as Rupert was
- the quicker in the get-away and never failed of the pole in the first
- quarter, the two as they neared me offered the old picture of Rupert on
- the rail and leading by half his length.
- </p>
- <p>
- Had I owned a better chance of observation, I might have noted as Prince
- Rupert drew near the buttonwood that his mind was not at ease. He
- remembered those two biting flints; they were lessons not lost on him. As
- I stepped from concealment to hurl my last stone, it is to be believed
- that Rupert&mdash;his alarmed eyes roving for lions in his path&mdash;glimpsed
- me. Certain it is that as the missile flew from my hand, Rupert swerved
- across the track, the hub of his sulky narrowly missing the shoulder of
- the mare.
- </p>
- <p>
- The sudden shift confused my markmanship, and instead of Rupert, the stone
- smote the driver on the ear and all but swept him from his seat. It did
- the work, however; whether from the stone, the whip, or that state of
- general perturbation wherein his fell experiences had left his nerves,
- Rupert went fairly to pieces. Before he was on his feet again and squared
- away, the Belle had won.
- </p>
- <p>
- Peeping from my hiding place I could tell that my adroit interference in
- the late contest was becoming the subject of public concern. Rupert&rsquo;s
- driver, still sitting in his sulky, was holding high his whip in
- professional invocation of the judges&rsquo; eyes. And that ill-used horseman
- was talking; at intervals he pointed with the utmost feeling towards my
- butonwood. Nor was his oratory without power; he had not discoursed long
- when amid an abundance of shouts and oaths and brandished canes, one
- thousand gentlemen of the turf were under head in my direction.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was interesting, but I did not stay in contemplation of the spectacle;
- I out and bolted. I crossed the track and ran straight for the end fence.
- This latter barrier looked somewhat high; I made no essay to climb, but,
- picking a broadest board, launched myself against it, shoulder on. The
- board fell and I was through the gap and in an open field.
- </p>
- <p>
- But why waste time with that hustling hue and cry? It was futile for all
- its indignant energy; I promise you, I made good my distance. Young,
- strung like a harp, with a third of a mile start and able to speed like a
- deer, I ran the hunt out of sight in the first ten minutes. It was all
- earnestness, that flight of mine. I fled through three villages and a puny
- little river that fell across my path. I welcomed the river, for I knew it
- would cool the quest.
- </p>
- <p>
- Of a verity! I got my money, and my stone throwing was not to be in vain.
- True, the driver and the owner of Rupert both protested, but the track
- statutes were inexorable. The judges could take no cognizance of that
- cannonading from the buttonwood and gave the race&mdash;three straight
- heats&mdash;to Creole Belle. Surething Pete won his thousands; and as for
- me, my friend and I encountered according to our tryst and he brought me
- my money safe. Within fifteen hours from that time when I dealt disaster
- to Rupert from the sheltering buttonwood, clothed and in respectable
- tears, I was kneeling by my mother&rsquo;s side and taking what sorrowful joy I
- might for having arrived while she was yet equal to the bestowal of her
- blessing.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- It was to be our last evening about the great stone fireplace; the last of
- our stories would be told. The roads were now broken, and though a
- now-and-then upset was more than likely to enliven one&rsquo;s goings about,
- sleighs and sleds as schemes of conveyance were pronounced to be among
- things possible. As we drew our chairs about the blaze, the jangle of an
- occasional leash of bells showed how some brave spirit was even then
- abroad.
- </p>
- <p>
- Under these inspiring conditions, the Sour Gentleman and the Red Nosed
- Gentleman declared their purpose of on the morrow pressing for the railway
- station eighteen miles away. To this end they had already chartered a
- sleigh, and the word was out that it be at the Inn door by ten of the
- morning clock.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myself, nothing was driving me of business or concern, and I was in no
- haste to leave; and the Old Cattleman and his ward, Sioux Sam, were also
- of a mind to abide where they were for a farther day or two at least. But
- the going of the Sour Gentleman and the Red Nosed Gentleman would destroy
- our circle, wherefore we were driven to regard this as &ldquo;our last evening,&rdquo;
- and to crown it honorably the Jolly Doctor brewed a giant bowl of what he
- described as punch. The others, both by voice and the loyalty wherewith
- they applied themselves to its disappearance, avowed its excellencies, and
- on that point Sioux Sam and I were content to receive their words.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Red Nosed Gentleman&mdash;who had put aside his burgundy in compliment
- to the Jolly Doctor and his punch, and seemed sensibly exhilarated by this
- change of beverage&mdash;was the first to give the company a story. It was
- of his younger, green-cloth days, and the title by which he distinguished
- it was &ldquo;When I Ran the Shotgun.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0023" id="link2HCH0023"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXIII.&mdash;WHEN I RAN THE SHOTGUN.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span>bout this time the
- city of Providence fell midspasm in a fit of civic morality. Communities,
- like individuals, are prone to starts of strenuous virtue, and Providence,
- bewailing her past iniquities, was pushing towards a pure if not a festive
- life. And because in this new mood to be excellent it was the easiest,
- nearest thing, Providence smote upon the gambling brotherhood with the
- heavy hand of the police. The faro games and wheels of roulette were swept
- away and more than one who had shared their feverish profits were sent
- into captivity. Yea forsooth! the gay fraternity of fortune whose staff of
- life was cards found themselves borne upon with the burden of bad days.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myself I conceived this to be the propitious moment to open a faro
- room of my own. I had been for long of the guild of gamblers yet had never
- soared to the brave heights of proprietorship. I had bucked the games, but
- never dealt them. It came to me as a thought that in the beating midst of
- this moral tempest dwelt my opportunity. Had I chosen a day of police
- apathy&mdash;an hour of gambling security&mdash;for such a move, I would
- have been set upon by every established proprietor. He would have resented
- my rivalry as a game warden would the intromissions of a poacher. And I&rsquo;d
- have been wiped out&mdash;devoured horn and hide and hoof as by a band of
- wolves.
- </p>
- <p>
- Under these new conditions of communal virtue, however, and with the clan
- of former proprietors broken and dispersed, the field was free of menace
- from within; I would face no risk more grievous than the constabulary.
- These latter I believed I might for a season avoid; particularly if I
- unveiled my venture in regions new and not theretofore the home of such
- lawless speculation.
- </p>
- <p>
- Filled with these thoughts, I secured apartments sufficiently obscure and
- smuggled in the paraphernalia under cloud of night. The room was small&mdash;twenty
- feet square; there was space for no more than one faro table, and with
- such scant furnishing I went to work. For reasons which now escape me I
- called my place &ldquo;The Shotgun.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Heretofore I gave you assurance of the lapse of years since last I gambled
- at any game save the Wall Street game of stocks. I quit cards for that
- they were disreputable and the gains but small. Stocks, on the contrary,
- are endorsed as &ldquo;respectable;&rdquo; at stocks one may gamble without forfeiture
- of position; also, there exist no frontiers to the profits which a cunning
- stock plan well executed may bring.
- </p>
- <p>
- In my old simpler days, I well recall those defences of the pure gambler
- wherein my regard indulged. Elia once separated humanity into two tribes&mdash;those
- who borrow and those who lend. In my younger philosophy I also saw two
- septs: those who lose and those who win. To me all men were gamblers. Life
- itself was one continuous game of chance; and the stakes, that shelter and
- raiment and food and drink to compose the body&rsquo;s bulwark against an
- instant conquest by Death. Of the inherent morality of gambling I nurtured
- no doubts. Or, at the worst, I felt certain of its comparative morality
- when laid beside such commerces as banks and markets and fields of plain
- barter and sale. There is no trade (I said) save that of the hands which
- is held by the tether of any honesty. The carpenter sawing boards, the
- smith who beats out a horseshoe, the mason busy with trowel and mortar on
- sun-blistered scaffolds, hoarsely shouting &ldquo;More bricks!&rdquo; they in their
- way of life are honest. They are bound to integrity because they couldn&rsquo;t
- cheat if they would. But is the merchant selling the false for the real&mdash;the
- shoddy for the true&mdash;is the merchant whose advertisements are as so
- many false pretences paid for by the line&mdash;is he more honest than the
- one who cheats with cards? Is the lawyer looking looks of wisdom to hide
- the emptiness of his ignorance? Is the doctor, profound of mien, who
- shakes portentous head, medicining a victim not because he has a malady
- but because he has a million dollars?
- </p>
- <p>
- And if it become a question of fashion, why then, age in and age out, the
- gambler has been often noble and sometimes royal. In the days of the
- Stuarts, or later among the dull ones of Hanover, was it the peasant or
- the prince who wagered his gold at cards? Why man! every royal court was a
- gambling house; every king, save one&mdash;and he disloved and at the last
- insane&mdash;a gambler. Are not two-thirds of the homes of our American
- nobility&mdash;our folk of millions and Fifth Avenue&mdash;replete of faro
- and roulette and the very hotbed of a poisonous bridge whist? Fy, man, fy!
- you who denounce gambling but preach your own plebeianism&mdash;proclaim
- your own vulgarity! The gambler has been ever the patrician.
- </p>
- <p>
- With but one table, whereat I would preside as dealer, I required no
- multitude to man The Shotgun. I called to my aid three gentlemen of
- fortune&mdash;seedy and in want they were and glad to earn a dollar. One
- was to be sentinel at the door, one would perch Argus-like on the
- lookout&rsquo;s stool, while the third,&mdash;an old suspicious camp-follower of
- Chance,&mdash;kept the case. This latter, cautious man! declined my
- service unless I put steel bars on the only door, and as well on the only
- window. These he conceived to be some safeguard against invasions. They
- were not; but I spent money to put them in place to the end that his
- fluttered nerves be stilled and he won to my standard. And at that, he
- later pursued his business as case-keeper with an ear on the door and an
- eye on the small barred window, sitting the while half aloof from the
- table and pushing the case-buttons as the cards fell from the box with a
- timid forefinger and as though he proposed no further immersion in current
- crime than was absolutely demanded by the duties of his place. He sat
- throughout the games a picture of apprehension.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myself, and to promote my profits, I gave both my people and my
- customers every verbal bond of safety. The story went abroad that I was
- &ldquo;protected;&rdquo; that no wolf of the police dared so much as glance at flock
- of mine. The Shotgun was immune of arrest, so ran the common tale, and as
- much as leer and look and smile and shrug of shoulder might furnish them I
- gave the story wings.
- </p>
- <p>
- This public theory of safety was necessary to success. In the then hectic
- conditions, and briskly in the rear of a stern suppression of resorts that
- had flourished for decades unshaken of the law, wanting this feeling of
- security there would have come not one dollar to take its hopeful chances
- at The Shotgun. As it was, however, the belief that I lived amply
- &ldquo;protected&rdquo; took prompt deep root. And the fact that The Shotgun opened in
- the face of storms which smote without pity upon others, was itself
- regarded as proof beyond dispute. No one would court such dangers unless
- his footing were as unshakable as Gibraltar. Thereupon folk with a heart
- for faro came blithely and stood four deep about my one table; vast was
- the business I accomplished and vast were the sums changed in. And behold!
- I widely prospered.
- </p>
- <p>
- When I founded The Shotgun, I was richer of hope than of money; but
- fortune smiled and within a fortnight my treasure was told by thousands.
- Indeed, my patrons played as play those who are starved to gamble; that
- recess of faro enforced of the police had made them hawk-hungry. And my
- gains rolled in.
- </p>
- <p>
- While I fostered the common thought that no interference of the law would
- occur and The Shotgun was sacred ground, I felt within my own breast a
- sense of much unsafety. Damocles with his sword&mdash;hung of a hair and
- shaken of a breeze&mdash;could have been no more eaten of unease. I knew
- that I was wooing disaster, challenging a deepest peril. The moment The
- Shotgun became a part of police knowledge, I was lost.
- </p>
- <p>
- Still, I dealt on; the richness of my rewards the inducement and the
- optimism of the born gambler giving me courage to proceed. It fed my
- vanity, too, and hugely pleased my pride to be thus looked upon as eminent
- in my relations with the powers that ruled. They were proud, even though
- parlous days, those days when I ran The Shotgun.
- </p>
- <p>
- While I walked the field of my enterprise like a conqueror, I was not
- without the prudence that taketh account in advance and prepareth for a
- fall. Aside from the table whereon dwelt the layout, box and check rack,
- and those half-dozen chairs which encircled it, the one lone piece of
- furniture which The Shotgun boasted was a rotund lounge. Those who now and
- then reposed themselves thereon noted and denounced its nard unfitness.
- There was neither softness nor spring to that lounge; to sit upon it was
- as though one sat upon a Saratoga trunk. But it was in a farthest corner
- and distant as much as might be from the game; and therefore there arose
- but few to try its indurated merits and complain.
- </p>
- <p>
- That lounge of unsympathetic seat was my secret&mdash;my refuge&mdash;my
- last resort. I alone was aware of its construction; and that I might be
- thus alone, I had been to hidden and especial pains to bring it from New
- York myself. That lounge was no more, no less than a huge, capacious box.
- You might lift the seat and it would open like a trunk. Within was ample
- room for one to lie at length. Once in one could let down the cover and
- lock it on the inside; that done, there again it stood to the casual eye,
- a lounge, nothing save a lounge and neither hint nor token of the fugitive
- within.
- </p>
- <p>
- My plan to save myself when the crash should come was plain and sure.
- There were but two lights&mdash;gas jets, both&mdash;in The Shotgun; these
- were immediately above the table, low hung and capped with green shades to
- save the eyes of players. The light was reflected upon the layout; all
- else was in the shadow. This lack of light was no drawback to my
- popularity. Your folk who gamble cavil not at shadows for themselves so
- long as cards and deal-box are kept strongly in the glare. In event of a
- raid, it was my programme to extinguish the two lights&mdash;a feat easily
- per-formable from the dealer&rsquo;s chair&mdash;and seizing the money in the
- drawer, grope my way under cover of darkness for that excellent lounge and
- conceal myself. It would be the work of a moment; the folk would be
- huddled about the table and not about the lounge; the time lost by the
- police while breaking through those defences of bars and bolts would be
- more than enough.
- </p>
- <p>
- By the time the lights were again turned on and the Goths in possession, I
- would have disappeared. No one would know how and none know where. When
- the blue enemy, despairing of my apprehension, had at last withdrawn with
- what prisoners had been made, I would be left alone. I might then uncover
- myself and take such subsequent flight as best became my liberty and its
- continuance.
- </p>
- <p>
- Often I went over this plan in my thoughts&mdash;a fashion of mental
- rehearsal, as it were&mdash;and the more I considered the more certain I
- became that when the pinch arrived it would not fail. As I&rsquo;ve stated, none
- shared with me my secret of that hinged and hollow couch; it was my
- insurance&mdash;my cave of retreat in any tornado of the law; and the
- knowledge thereof steadied me and aided my courage to compose those airs
- of cheerful confidence which taught others safety and gave countenance to
- the story of my unqualified and sure &ldquo;protection!&rdquo; Alas! for the hour that
- unmasked me; from that moment The Shotgun fell away; my stream of golden
- profits ran dry; from a spectacle of reverence and respect I became the
- nine-day byword of my tribe!
- </p>
- <p>
- It was a crowded, thriving midnight at The Shotgun. I had been running an
- uninterrupted quartette of months; and having had good luck to the point
- of miracles, my finances were flourishing with five figures in their
- plethoric count. From a few poor hundreds, my &ldquo;roll&rdquo; when I snapped the
- rubber band about it and planted it deep within the safety of my pocket,
- held over fifty thousand dollars. Quite a fortune; and so I thought
- myself.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was, I repeat, a busy, winning midnight at The Shotgun. There were
- doubtless full forty visitors in the cramped room. These were crowded
- about the table, for the most part playing, reaching over each other&rsquo;s
- shoulders or under each other&rsquo;s elbows, any way and every way to get their
- wagers on the layout. I was dealing, while to right and left sat my
- henchmen of the lookout and the case.
- </p>
- <p>
- As on every evening, I lived on the feather-edge of apprehension, fearing
- a raid. My eye might be on the thirteen cards and the little fortunes they
- carried, but my ear was ever alert for a first dull footfall that would
- tell of destruction on its lowering way.
- </p>
- <p>
- There had been four hours of brisk, remunerative play&mdash;for the game
- began at eight&mdash;when, in the middle of a deal, there came the rush of
- heavy feet and a tumult of stumblings and blunderings on the stair. It was
- as if folk unaccustomed to the way&mdash;it being pitch dark on the
- stairway for caution&rsquo;s sake&mdash;and in vast eagerness to reach the door,
- had tripped and fallen. Also, if one might judge from the uproar and
- smothered, deep profanity of many voices there were a score engaged.
- </p>
- <p>
- To my quick intelligence, itself for long on the rack of expectancy and
- therefore doubly keen, there seemed but one answer to the question, of
- that riot on the stair. It was the police; the Philistines were upon me;
- my gold mine of The Shotgun had become the target of a raid!
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the labor of an instant. With both hands I turned out the lights;
- then stuffing my entire fortune into my pockets I began to push through
- the ranks of bewildered gentlemen who stood swearing in frightened
- undertones expecting evil. Silently and with a cat&rsquo;s stealth, I found my
- way in the pitch blackness to the lounge. As I had foreseen, no one was
- about it to discover or to interfere. Softly I raised the cover; in a
- moment I was within. Lying on my side for comfort&rsquo;s sake, I again turned
- ear to passing events. I had locked the lounge and believed myself
- insured.
- </p>
- <p>
- Meanwhile, within the room and in the hall beyond my grated door, the
- tumult gathered and grew. There came various exclamations.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Who doused those glims?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Light up, somebody.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Also, there befell a volley of blows and kicks and thumps on The Shotgun&rsquo;s
- iron portals; and gruff commands:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Open the door!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then some one produced a match and relighted the gas. I might tell that by
- a ray about the size and color of a wheat-straw which suddenly bored its
- yellow way through a hole in my shelter. The clamor still proceeded at the
- door; it seemed to augment.
- </p>
- <p>
- Since there could be no escape&mdash;for every soul saw himself caught
- like a rat in a trap&mdash;the door was at last unbarred and opened,
- desperately. Of what avail would it be to force the arresting party to
- break its way? In despair the door was thrown wide and each of those
- within braced himself to meet his fate. After all, to visit a gambling
- place was not the great crime; the cornered ones might feel fairly secure.
- It was the &ldquo;proprietor&rdquo; for whom the law kept sharpest tooth!
- </p>
- <p>
- When the door opened, it opened to the admission of a most delightful
- disappointment. There appeared no police; no grim array of those sky-hued
- watch-dogs of the city&rsquo;s peace and order rushed through in search of
- quarry. Instead came innocently, deviously, and with uncertain, shuffling
- steps, five separate drunken gentlemen. There had been a dinner; they had
- fed deeply, drunk deeply; it was now their pleasure to relax themselves at
- play. That was all; they had sought The Shotgun with the best of motives;
- the confusion on the stair was the offspring of darkness and drink when
- brought to a conjunction. Now they were within, and reading in the faces
- about them&mdash;even through the mists of their condition&mdash;the
- terrors their advent inspired, the visiting sots were much abashed; they
- stood silent, and like the lamb before the shearer, they were dumb and
- opened not their mouths.
- </p>
- <p>
- But discovering a danger past, the general mood soon changed. There was a
- space of tacit staring; then came a rout of laughter. Every throat, lately
- so parched, now shouted with derision. The common fear became the common
- jeer.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then up started the surprised question:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Where&rsquo;s Jack?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It had origin with one to be repeated by twenty.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Where&rsquo;s Jack?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The barred window was still barred; I had not gone through the door; how
- had I managed my disappearance? It was witchery!&mdash;or like the
- flitting of a ghost! Even in my refuge I could feel the awe and the chill
- that began to creep about my visitors as they looked uneasily and
- repeated, as folk who touch some graveyard mystery:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Where&rsquo;s Jack?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- There was no help; fate held me in a corner and never a crack of escape!
- Shame-faced, dust-sprinkled and perspiring like a harvest hand&mdash;for
- my hiding place was not Nova Zembla&mdash;I threw back the top of the
- lounge and stood there&mdash;the image of confusion&mdash;the &ldquo;man with a
- pull&rdquo;&mdash;the ally of the powers&mdash;the &ldquo;protected&rdquo; proprietor of The
- Shotgun! There was a moment of silence; and next fell a whirlwind of
- mirth.
- </p>
- <p>
- There is no argument for saying more. I was laughed out of Providence and
- into New York. The Shotgun was laughed out of existence. And with it all,
- I too, laughed; for was it not good, even though inadvertent comedy? Also,
- was it not valuable comedy to leave me better by half a hundred thousand
- dollars&mdash;that comedy of The Shotgun? And thereupon, while I closed my
- game, I opened my mouth widely and laughed with the others. In green-cloth
- circles the story is still told; and whenever I encounter a friend of
- former days, I&rsquo;m inevitably recalled to my lounge-holdout and that
- midnight stampede of The Shotgun.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s where the west,&rdquo; observed the Old Cattleman, who had given
- delighted ear to the Red Nosed Gentleman&rsquo;s story, &ldquo;that&rsquo;s where the west
- has the best of the east. In Arizona a passel of folks engaged in testin&rsquo;
- the demerits of farobank ain&rsquo;t runnin&rsquo; no more resks of the constables
- than they be of chills an&rsquo; fever.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;There are laws against gambling in the west?&rdquo; This from the Jolly Doctor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Shore, thar&rsquo;s laws.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why, then, aren&rsquo;t they enforced?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This yere&rsquo;s the reason,&rdquo; responded the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;Thar&rsquo;s so much
- more law than force, that what force exists is wholly deevoted to a
- round-up of rustlers an&rsquo; stage hold-ups an&rsquo; sech. Besides, it&rsquo;s the
- western notion to let every gent skin his own eel, an&rsquo; the last thing
- thought of is to protect you from yourse&rsquo;f. No kyard sharp can put a crimp
- in you onless you freely offers him a chance, an&rsquo; if you-all is willin&rsquo;,
- why should the public paint for war? In the east every gent is tryin&rsquo; to
- play some other gent&rsquo;s hand; not so in that tolerant region styled the
- west. Which it ain&rsquo;t too much to say that folks get killed&mdash;an&rsquo;
- properly&mdash;in the west for possessin&rsquo; what the east calls virchoos.&rdquo;
- And here the Old Cattleman shook his head sagely over a western
- superiority. &ldquo;The east mixes itse&rsquo;f too much in a gent&rsquo;s private affairs.
- Now if Deef Smith an&rsquo; Colonel Morton&rdquo; he concluded, &ldquo;had ondertook to pull
- off their dooel in the east that Texas time, the east would have come down
- on &rsquo;em like a failin&rsquo; star an&rsquo; squelched it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And what was this duel you speak of?&rdquo; asked the Sour Gentleman. &ldquo;I, for
- one, would be most ready to hear the story.1&rsquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which it&rsquo;s the story of &lsquo;When the Capitol Was Moved.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0024" id="link2HCH0024"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXIV.&mdash;WHEN THE CAPITOL WAS MOVED.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>hen the joobilant
- Texans set down to kyarve out the destinies of that empire they wrests
- from the feeble paws of the Mexicans an&rsquo; Santa Anna, they decides on
- Austin for the Capitol an&rsquo; Old Houston to be President. An&rsquo; I&rsquo;ll say right
- yere, Old Houston, by all roomer an&rsquo; tradition, is mighty likely the most
- presidential president that ever keeps a republic guessin&rsquo; as to whatever
- is he goin&rsquo; to do next. Which he&rsquo;s as full of surprises as a night in Red
- Dog.
- </p>
- <p>
- About the first dash outen the box, Old Houston gets himse&rsquo;f into trouble
- with two Lone Star leadin&rsquo; citizens whose names, respective, is Colonel
- Morton an&rsquo; jedge Webb.
- </p>
- <p>
- Old Houston himse&rsquo;f on the hocks of them vict&rsquo;ries he partic&rsquo;pates in, an&rsquo;
- bein&rsquo; selected president like I say, grows as full of vanity as a prairie
- dog. Shore! he&rsquo;s a hero; the drawback is that his notion of demeanin&rsquo;
- himse&rsquo;f as sech is to spread his tail feathers an&rsquo; strut. Old Houston gets
- that puffed up, an&rsquo; his dignity is that egreegious, he feels crowded if a
- gent tries to walk on the same street with him.
- </p>
- <p>
- Colonel Morton an&rsquo; Jedge Webb themse&rsquo;fs wades through that carnage from
- soda to hock freein&rsquo; Texas, an&rsquo; they sort o&rsquo; figgers that these yere
- services entitles them to be heard some. Old Houston, who&rsquo;s born with a
- notion that he&rsquo;s doo&rsquo; to make what public uproar every o&rsquo;casion demands,
- don&rsquo;t encourage them two patriots. He only listens now an&rsquo; then to Morton;
- an&rsquo; as for Jedge Webb, he jest won&rsquo;t let that jurist talk at all.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; for these yere followin&rsquo; reasons to wit,&rdquo; explains Old Houston, when
- some Austin sports puts it to him p&rsquo;lite, but steadfast, that he&rsquo;s onjust
- to Webb. &ldquo;I permits Morton to talk some, because it don&rsquo;t make a splinter
- of difference what Morton says. He can talk on any side of any subject an&rsquo;
- no one&rsquo;s ediot enough to pay the least attention to them remarks. But this
- sityooation is changed when you-all gets to Webb. He&rsquo;s a disaster. Webb
- never opens his mouth without subtractin&rsquo; from the sum total of hooman
- knowledge.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0015" id="linkimage-0015"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0369.jpg" alt="0369 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0369.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- When Morton hears of them remarks he re-gyards himse&rsquo;f as wronged.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; if Old Houston,&rdquo; observes Morton, who&rsquo;s a knife fighter an&rsquo; has
- sliced offensive gents from time to time; &ldquo;an&rsquo; if Old Houston ain&rsquo;t more
- gyarded in his remarks, I&rsquo;ll take to disapprovin&rsquo; of his conduct with a
- bowie.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As I intimates, Old Houston is that pride-blown that you-all couldn&rsquo;t stay
- on the same range where he is. An&rsquo; he&rsquo;s worried to a standstill for a
- openin&rsquo; to onload on the Texas public a speciment of his dignity. At last,
- seein&rsquo; the chances comin&rsquo; some slow, he ups an&rsquo; constructs the opportunity
- himse&rsquo;f.
- </p>
- <p>
- Old Houston&rsquo;s home-camp, that a-way, is at a hamlet named Washin&rsquo;ton down
- on the Brazos. It&rsquo;s thar he squanders the heft of his leesure when not
- back of the game as President over to Austin. Thar&rsquo;s a clause in the
- constitootion which, while pitchin&rsquo; onto Austin as the public&rsquo;s
- home-ranche or capitol, permits the President in the event of perils
- onforeseen or invasions or sech, to round up the archives an&rsquo; move the
- capitol camp a whole lot. Old Houston, eager to be great, seizes onto this
- yere tenet.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll jest sort o&rsquo; order the capitol to come down, yere where I live at,&rdquo;
- says Old Houston, &ldquo;an&rsquo; tharby call the waverin&rsquo; attention of the Lone Star
- public to who I be.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As leadin&rsquo; up to this atrocity an&rsquo; to come within the constitootion, Old
- Houston allows that Austin is menaced by Comanches. Shore, it ain&rsquo;t
- menaced none; Austin would esteem the cleanin&rsquo; out of that entire Comanche
- tribe as the labors of a holiday. But it fills into Old Houston&rsquo;s hand to
- make this bluff as a excuse. An&rsquo; with that, he issues the order to bring
- the whole gov&rsquo;ment layout down to where he lives.
- </p>
- <p>
- No, as I tells you-all before, Austin ain&rsquo;t in no more danger of Comanches
- than she is of j&rsquo;inin&rsquo; the church. Troo, these yere rannikaboo savages
- does show up in paint an&rsquo; feathers over across the Colorado once or twice;
- but beyond a whoop or two an&rsquo; a little permiscus shootin&rsquo; into town which
- nobody minds, them vis&rsquo;tations don&rsquo;t count.
- </p>
- <p>
- To give you-all gents a idee how little is deemed of Comanches by them
- Texas forefathers, let me say a word of Bill Spence who keeps a store in
- Austin. Bill&rsquo;s addin&rsquo; up Virg Horne&rsquo;s accounts one afternoon in his books.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;One pa&rsquo;r of yaller-top, copper-toe boots for Virg, joonior, three
- dollars; one red cal&rsquo;co dress for Missis Virg, two dollars,&rdquo; goes on Bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- At this epock Bill hears a yowl; glancin&rsquo; out of the winder, he counts a
- couple of hundred Injuns who&rsquo;s proselytin&rsquo; about over on t&rsquo;other side of
- the river. Bill don&rsquo;t get up none; he jests looks annoyed on account of
- that yellin&rsquo; puttin&rsquo; him out in his book-keepin&rsquo;.
- </p>
- <p>
- As a bullet from them savages comes singin&rsquo; in the r&rsquo;ar door an&rsquo; buries
- itse&rsquo;f in a ham, Bill even gets incensed.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Hiram,&rdquo; he calls to his twelve-year old son, who&rsquo;s down cellar drawin&rsquo;
- red-eye for a customer; &ldquo;Hiram, you-all take pop&rsquo;s rifle, raise the
- hindsight for three hundred yards, an&rsquo; reprove them hostiles. Aim low,
- Hiram, an&rsquo; if you fetches one, pop&rsquo;ll give you a seegyar an&rsquo; let you smoke
- it yourse&rsquo;f.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill goes back to Virg Horne&rsquo;s account, an&rsquo; Hiram after slammin&rsquo; away with
- Bill&rsquo;s old Hawkins once or twice comes in an&rsquo; gets his seegyar.
- </p>
- <p>
- No; Old Houston does wrong when he flings forth this yere ukase about
- movin&rsquo; the capitol. Austin, even if a gent does have to dodge a arrer or
- duck a bullet as he prosecootes his daily tasks, is as safe as a
- camp-meetin&rsquo;.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Old Houston makes the order, one of his Brazos pards reemonstrates
- with him.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which Austin will simply go into the air all spraddled out,&rdquo; says this
- pard.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;If Austin sails up in the air an&rsquo; stays thar,&rdquo; says Old Houston, &ldquo;still
- you-all can gamble that this yere order goes.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You hears,&rdquo; says another, &ldquo;Elder Peters when he tells of how a Mexican
- named Mohammed commands the mountain to come to him? But the mountain
- calls his bluff; that promontory stands pat, an&rsquo; Mohammed has to go to the
- mountain.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;My name&rsquo;s Sam Houston an&rsquo; it ain&rsquo;t Mo-hommed,&rdquo; retorts Old Houston.
- &ldquo;Moreover, Mohammed don&rsquo;t have no written constitootion.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Nacherally, when Austin gets notice of Old Houston&rsquo;s plan, that
- meetropolis r&rsquo;ars back an&rsquo; screams. The faro-bank folks an&rsquo; the tavern
- folks is speshul malignant, an&rsquo; it ain&rsquo;t no time before they-all convenes
- a meetin&rsquo; to express their views on Old Houston. Morton an&rsquo; Jedge Webb
- does the oratory. An&rsquo; you hear me! that assembly is shore sultry. Which
- the epithets they applies to Old Houston kills the grass for twenty rods
- about.
- </p>
- <p>
- Austin won&rsquo;t move.
- </p>
- <p>
- Austin resolves to go to war first; a small army is organized with Morton
- in command to gyard the State House an&rsquo; the State books that a-way, an&rsquo;
- keep Old Houston from romancin&rsquo; over an&rsquo; packin&rsquo; &rsquo;em off a heap.
- </p>
- <p>
- Morton is talkin&rsquo; an&rsquo; Webb is presidin&rsquo; over this yere convocation&mdash;which
- the said meetin&rsquo; is that large an&rsquo; enthoosiastic it plumb chokes up the
- hall an&rsquo; overflows into the street&mdash;when all of a sudden a party
- comes swingin&rsquo; through the open winder from the top of a scrub-oak that
- grows alongside the buildin&rsquo;, an&rsquo; drops light as a cat onto the platform
- with Morton an&rsquo; Webb. At this yere interruption, affairs comes to a halt,
- an&rsquo; the local sports turns in to consider an&rsquo; count up the invader.
- </p>
- <p>
- This gent who swoops through the winder is dark, big, bony an&rsquo; tall; his
- ha&rsquo;r is lank an&rsquo; long as the mane of a hoss; his eyes is deep an&rsquo; black;
- his face, tanned like a Injun&rsquo;s, seems hard as iron. He&rsquo;s dressed in
- leather from foretop to fetlock, is shod with a pa&rsquo;r of Comanche
- moccasins, an&rsquo; besides a &rsquo;leven inch knife in his belt, packs a
- rifle with a 48-inch bar&rsquo;l. It will weigh twenty pounds, an&rsquo; yet this
- stranger handles it like it&rsquo;s a willow switch.
- </p>
- <p>
- As this darksome gent lands in among Morton an&rsquo; Webb, he stands thar
- without sayin&rsquo; a word. Webb, on his part, is amazed, while Morton glowers.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Whatever do you-all regyard as a market price for your skelp?&rsquo;&rdquo; says
- Morton to the black interloper, at the same time loosenin&rsquo; his knife.
- </p>
- <p>
- The black stranger makes no reply; his hand flashes to his bowie, while
- his face still wears its iron look.
- </p>
- <p>
- Webb, some hurried, pushes in between Morton an&rsquo; the black stranger. Webb
- is more for peace an&rsquo; don&rsquo;t believe in beginnin&rsquo; negotiations with a
- knife.
- </p>
- <p>
- Webb dictates a passel of p&rsquo;lite queries to this yere black stranger.
- Tharupon, the black stranger bows p&rsquo;lite an&rsquo; formal, an&rsquo; goin&rsquo; over to the
- table writes down in good English, &ldquo;I&rsquo;m deef an&rsquo; dumb.&rdquo; Next, he searches
- outen his war-bags a letter. It&rsquo;s from Old Houston over on the Brazos. Old
- Houston allows that onless Austin comes trailin&rsquo; in with them records
- within three days, he&rsquo;ll ride over a whole lot an&rsquo; make the round-up
- himse&rsquo;f. Old Houston declar&rsquo;s that Austin by virchoo of them Comanches is
- as on-safe as a Christian in Mississippi, an&rsquo; he don&rsquo;t aim to face no sech
- dangers while performin&rsquo; his dooties as President of the Commonwealth.
- </p>
- <p>
- After the black stranger flings the letter on the table, he&rsquo;s organizin&rsquo;
- to go out through the winder ag&rsquo;in. But Morton sort o&rsquo; detains him. Morton
- writes on the paper that now the black stranger is through his dooties as
- a postman, he will, if he&rsquo;s a dead game sport, stay over a day, an&rsquo; him
- an&rsquo; Morton will entertain themse&rsquo;fs by pullin&rsquo; off a war of their own. The
- idee strikes the black stranger as plenty good, an&rsquo; while his face still
- wears its ca&rsquo;m, hard look, he writes onder Morton&rsquo;s bluff:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Rifles; no&rsquo;th bank of the Colorado; sun-down, this evenin&rsquo;.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The next moment he leaps from the platform to the winder an&rsquo; from thar to
- the ground, an&rsquo; is gone.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But Colonel Morton,&rdquo; reemonstrates Webb, who&rsquo;s some scand&rsquo;lized at Morton
- hookin&rsquo; up for blood with this yere black stranger; &ldquo;you-all shorely don&rsquo;t
- aim to fight this party? He&rsquo;s deef an&rsquo; dumb, which is next to bein&rsquo; locoed
- outright. Moreover, a gent of your standin&rsquo; can&rsquo;t afford to go ramblin&rsquo;
- about, lockin&rsquo; horns with every on-known miscreant who comes buttin&rsquo; in
- with a missif from President Houston, an&rsquo; then goes stampedin&rsquo; through a
- winder by way of exit.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Onknown!&rdquo; retorts Morton. &ldquo;That letterpackin&rsquo; person is as well known as
- the Rio Grande. That&rsquo;s Deef Smith.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Colonel Morton,&rdquo; observes Webb, some horrified when he learns the name of
- the black stranger, &ldquo;this yere Deef Smith is a shore shot. They say he can
- empty a Comanche saddle four times in five at three hundred yards.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That may be as it may,&rdquo; returns Morton. &ldquo;If I downs him, so much the more
- credit; if he gets me, at the worst I dies by a famous hand.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The sun is restin&rsquo; on the sky-line over to the west. Austin has done
- crossed the Colorado an&rsquo; lined up to witness this yere dooel. Deef Smith
- comes ridin&rsquo; in from some&rsquo;ers to the no&rsquo;th, slides outen the saddle, pats
- his hoss on the neck, an&rsquo; leaves him organized an&rsquo; ready fifty yards to
- one side. Then Deef Smith steps to the center an&rsquo; touches his hat,
- mil&rsquo;tary fashion, to Morton an&rsquo; Webb.
- </p>
- <p>
- These yere cavaliers is to shoot it out at one hundred yards. As they
- takes their places, Morton says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Jedge Webb, if this Deef Smith party gets me, as most like he will, send
- my watch to my mother in Looeyville.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then they fronts each other; one in brown leather, the other in cloth as
- good as gold can buy. No one thinks of any difference between &rsquo;em,
- however, in a day when courage is the test of aristocracy.
- </p>
- <p>
- Since one gent can&rsquo;t hear, Webb is to give the word with a handkerchief.
- At the first flourish the rifles fall to a hor&rsquo;zontal as still an&rsquo; steady
- as a rock. Thar&rsquo;s a brief pause; then Webb drops his handkerchief.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thar is a crack like one gun; Deef Smith&rsquo;s hat half turns on his head as
- the bullet cuts it, while Morton stands a moment an&rsquo; then, without a
- sound, falls dead on his face. The lead from Deef Smith&rsquo;s big rifle drills
- him through the heart. Also, since it perforates that gold repeater, an&rsquo;
- as the blood sort o&rsquo; clogs the works, the Austin folks decides it&rsquo;s no use
- to send it on to Looeyville, but retains it that a-way as a keepsake.
- </p>
- <p>
- With the bark of the guns an&rsquo; while the white smoke&rsquo;s still hangin&rsquo; to
- mark the spot where he stands, Deef Smith&rsquo;s hoss runs to him like a dog.
- The next instant Deef Smith is in the saddle an&rsquo; away. It&rsquo;s jest as well.
- Morton&rsquo;s plenty pop&rsquo;lar with the Austin folks an&rsquo; mebby some sharp, in the
- first hysteria of a great loss, overlooks what&rsquo;s doo to honor an&rsquo; ups an&rsquo;
- plugs this yere Deef Smith.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- The Old Cattleman made a long halt as indicative that his story was at an
- end. There was a moment of silence, and then the Jolly Doctor spoke up.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But how about the books and papers?&rdquo; asked the Jolly Doctor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Oh, nothin&rsquo; partic&rsquo;lar,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;It turns out like Old
- Houston prophesies. Three days later, vain an&rsquo; soopercilious, he rides in,
- corrals them archives, an&rsquo; totes &rsquo;em haughtily off to the Brazos.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Following the Old Cattleman&rsquo;s leaf from Lone Star annals, the Sour
- Gentleman prepared himself to give us his farewell page from the unwritten
- records of the Customs.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;On this, our last evening,&rdquo; observed the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;it seems the
- excellent thing to tell you what was practically my final act of service
- or, if you will, disservice with the Customs. We may call the story &lsquo;How
- the Filibusterer Sailed.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0025" id="link2HCH0025"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXV.&mdash;HOW THE FILIBUSTERER SAILED.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>t will come to you
- as strange, my friends, to hear objection&mdash;as though against an ill
- trait&mdash;to that open-handed generosity which is held by many to be
- among the marks of supreme virtue. Generosity, whether it be evidenced by
- gifts of money, of sympathy, of effort or of time, is only another word
- for weakness. If one were to go into careful consideration of the
- life-failure of any man, it would be found most often that his fortunes
- were slain by his generosity; and while, without consideration, he gave to
- others his countenance, his friendship, his money, his toil or whatever he
- conferred, he in truth but parted with his own future&mdash;with those raw
- materials wherewith he would otherwise have fashioned a victorious career.
- Generosity, in a commonest expression, is giving more than one receives;
- it is to give two hundred and get one hundred; he is blind, therefore, who
- does not see that any ardor of generosity would destroy a Rothschild.
- </p>
- <p>
- From birth, and as an attribute inborn, I have been ever too quick to
- give. For a first part of my life at least, and until I shackled my
- impulse of liberality, I was the constant victim of that natural
- readiness. And I was cheated and swindled with every rising sun. I gave
- friendship and took pretense; I parted with money for words; ever I
- rendered the real and received the false, and sold the substance for the
- shadow to any and all who came pleasantly to smile across my counter. I
- was not over-old, however, when these dour truths broke on me, and I began
- to teach myself the solvent beauty of saying &ldquo;No.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- During those months of exile&mdash;for exile it was&mdash;which I spent in
- Washington Square, I cultivated misanthropy&mdash;a hardness of spirit;
- almost, I might say, I fostered a hatred of my fellow man. And more or
- less I had success. I became owner of much stiffness of sentiment and a
- proneness to be practical; and kept ever before me like a star that, no
- matter how unimportant I might be to others, to myself at least I was most
- important of mankind. Doubtless, I lost in grace by such studies; but in
- its stead I succeeded to safety, and when we are at a final word, we live
- by what we keep and die by what we quit, and of all loyalties there&rsquo;s no
- loyalty like loyalty to one&rsquo;s self.
- </p>
- <p>
- While I can record a conquest of my generosity and its subjugation to
- lines of careful tit-for-tat, there were other emotions against which I
- was unable to toughen my soul. I became never so redoubtable that I could
- beat off the assaults of shame; never so puissant of sentiment but I was
- prey to regrets. For which weaknesses, I could not think on the affairs of
- The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars and The German Girl&rsquo;s Diamonds, nor on the sordid
- money I pouched as their fruits, without the blush mounting; nor was I
- strong enough to consider the latter adventure and escape a stab of sore
- remorse. Later could I have found the girl I would have made her
- restitution. Even now I hear again that scream which reached me on the
- forward deck of the &ldquo;Wolfgang&rdquo; that September afternoon.
- </p>
- <p>
- But concerning the Cuban filibusterer, his outsailing against Spain; and
- the gold I got for his going&mdash;for these I say, I never have
- experienced either confusion or sorrow. My orders were to keep him in; I
- opened the port&rsquo;s gate and let him out; I pocketed my yellow profits. And
- under equal conditions I would do as much again. It was an act of war
- against Spain; yet why should one shrink from one&rsquo;s interest for a reason
- like that? Where was the moral wrong? Nations make war; and what is right
- for a country, is right for a man. That is rock-embedded verity, if one
- will but look, and that which is dishonest for an individual cannot be
- honest for a flag. You may&mdash;if you so choose&mdash;make war on Spain,
- and with as much of justice as any proudest people that ever put to sea.
- The question of difference is but a question of strength; and so you be
- strong enough you&rsquo;ll be right enough, I warrant! For what says the poet?
- </p>
- <p>
- <br />
- </p>
- <p class="indent25">
- &ldquo;Right follows might
- </p>
- <p class="indent25">
- Like tail follows kite.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br />
- </p>
- <p>
- It is a merest truism; we hear it in the storm; the very waves are its
- witnesses. Everywhere and under each condition, it is true. The proof lies
- all about. We read it on every page of history; behold it when armies
- overthrow a throne or the oak falls beneath the axe of the woodman. Do I
- disfavor war? On the contrary, I approve it as an institution of greatest
- excellence. War slays; war has its blood. But has peace no victims? Peace
- kills thousands where war kills tens; and if one is to consider misery,
- why then there be more starvation, more cold, more pain, and more
- suffering in one year of New York City peace than pinched and gnawed
- throughout the whole four years of civil war. And human life is of
- comparative small moment. We say otherwise; we believe otherwise; but we
- don&rsquo;t act otherwise. Action is life&rsquo;s text. Humanity is itself the
- preacher; in that silent sermon of existence&mdash;an existence of world&rsquo;s
- goods and their acquirement&mdash;we forever show the thing of least
- consequence to be the life of man. However, I am not myself to preach, I
- who pushed forth to tell a story. It is the defect of age to be garrulous,
- and as one&rsquo;s power to do departs, its place is ever taken by a weakness to
- talk.
- </p>
- <p>
- This filibusterer whom I liberated to sail against Spain, I long ago told
- you was called Ryan. That, however, is a fictitious name; there was a
- Ryan, and the Spaniards took his life at Santiago. And because he with
- whom I dealt was also put up against a wall and riddled with Spanish lead,
- and further, because it is not well to give his true name, I call him Ryan
- now. His ship rode on her rope in New York bay; I was given the Harriet
- Lane to hold him from sailing away; his owners ashore&mdash;merchants
- these and folk on &rsquo;change&mdash;offered me ten thousand dollars;
- the gold was in bags, forty pounds of it; I turned my back at evening and
- in the morning he was gone.
- </p>
- <p>
- You have been told how I never thought on those adventures of The
- Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars, and The German Girl&rsquo;s Diamonds, without sensations of
- shame, and pain. Indeed! they were engagements of ignobility! Following
- the latter affair I felt a strongest impulse to change somewhat my
- occupation. I longed for an employment a bit safer and less foul. I
- counted my fortunes; I was rich with over seventy thousand dollars; that
- might do, even though I gained no more. And so it fell that I was almost
- ready to leave the Customs, and forswear and, if possible, forget, those
- sins I had helped commit in its name.
- </p>
- <p>
- In the former days, my home tribe was not without consequence in Old
- Dominion politics. And while we could not be said to have strengthened
- ourselves by that part we took against the Union, still, now that peace
- was come, the family began little by little to regather a former weight.
- It had enough at this time to interfere for my advantage and rescue me
- from my present duty. I was detailed from Washington to go secretly to
- Europe, make the careless tour of her capitols, and keep an eye alive to
- the interests of both the Treasury and the State Department.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was a gentleman&rsquo;s work; this loafing from London to Paris, and from
- Paris to Berlin, with an occasional glance into Holland and its diamond
- cutting. And aside from expenses&mdash;which were paid by the government&mdash;I
- drew two salaries; one from the Customs and a second from the Secret
- Service. My business was to detect intended smuggling and cable the story,
- to the end that Betelnut Jack and Lorns and Quin and the others make
- intelligent seizures when the smugglers came into New York. The better to
- gain such news, I put myself on closest terms&mdash;and still keep myself
- a secret&mdash;with chief folk among houses of export; I went about with
- them, drank with them, dined with them; and I wheedled and lay in ambush
- for information of big sales. I sent in many a good story; and many a rich
- seizure came off through my interference. Also I lived vastly among
- legation underlings, and despatched what I found to the Department of
- State. There was no complaint that I didn&rsquo;t earn my money from either my
- customs or my secret service paymaster. In truth! I stood high in their
- esteem.
- </p>
- <p>
- At times, too, I was baffled. There was a lady, the handsome wife of a
- diamond dealer in Maiden Lane. She came twice a year to Europe. Obviously
- and in plain view&mdash;like the vulgarian she was not&mdash;this
- beautiful woman, as she went aboard ship in New York, would wear at throat
- and ears and on her hands full two hundred thousand dollars&rsquo; worth of
- stones&mdash;apparently. And there they seemed to be when she returned;
- and, of course, never a dime of duty. We were morally sure this beautiful
- woman was a beautiful smuggler; we were morally sure those stones were
- paste when she sailed from New York; we were morally sure they were
- genuine, of purest water, when she returned; we were morally sure the
- shift was made in Paris, and that a harvest of thousands was garnered with
- every trip. But what might we do? We had no proof; we could get none; we
- could only guess.
- </p>
- <p>
- And there were other instances when we slipped. More than once I tracked a
- would-be smuggler to his ship and saw him out of port. And yet, when
- acting on my cables, the smuggler coming down the New York gang-plank was
- snapped up by my old comrades and searched, nothing was found. This
- mystery, for mystery it was, occurred a score of times. At last we learned
- the trick. The particular room occupied by the smuggler was taken both
- ways for a round dozen trips ahead. There were seven members of the
- smuggling combine. When one left the room, his voyage ended, and came
- ashore in New York, another went duly aboard and took possession for the
- return trip. The diamonds had not gone ashore. They were hidden in a sure
- place somewhere about the room; he who took it to go to Europe knew where.
- And in those several times to follow when the outgoer was on and off the
- boat before she cleared, he found no difficulty in carrying the gems
- ashore. The Customs folk aren&rsquo;t watching departures; their vigilance is
- for those who arrive. However, after a full score of defeats, we solved
- this last riddle, and managed a seizure which lost the rogues what profits
- they had gathered on all the trips before.
- </p>
- <p>
- Also, as I pried about the smuggling industry, I came across more than one
- interesting bit of knowledge. I found a French firm making rubies&mdash;actual
- rubies. It was a great secret in my time, though more is known of it now.
- The ruby was real; stood every test save the one test&mdash;a hard one to
- enforce&mdash;of specific gravity. The made ruby was a shadow lighter,
- bulk for bulk, than the true ruby of the mines. This made ruby was called
- the &ldquo;scientific ruby;&rdquo; and indeed! it was scientific to such a degree of
- delusion that the best experts were for long deceived and rubies which
- cost no more than two hundred dollars to make, were sold for ten thousand
- dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- As a curious discovery of my ramblings, I stumbled on a diamond, the one
- only of its brood. It was small, no more than three-quarters of a carat.
- But of a color pure orange and&mdash;by day or by night&mdash;blazing like
- a spark of fire. That stone if lost could be found; it is the one lone
- member of its orange house. What was its fate? Set in the open mouth of a
- little lion&rsquo;s head, one may now find it on the finger of a prince of the
- Bourse.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was while in Madrid, during my European hunting, that those seeds were
- sown which a few months later grew into a smart willingness to let down
- the bars for my filibusterer&rsquo;s escape. I was by stress of duty held a
- month in Madrid. And, first to last, I heard nothing from the natives when
- they spoke of America but malediction and vilest epithet. It kept me
- something warm, I promise, for all I had once ridden saber in hand to
- smite that same American government hip and thigh. I left Madrid when my
- work was done with never a moment&rsquo;s delay; and I carried away a profound
- hate for Spain and all things Spanish.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I was brought home by commands from my superiors at the end of my
- Madrid work, these anti-Spanish sentiments had by no means cooled when I
- made the New York wharf. Decidedly if I&rsquo;d been searched for a sentiment, I
- would have been discovered hostile to Spanish interest when, within three
- weeks following my home-coming, I was given the Harriet Lane, shown the
- suspect and his ship, and told to have a sleepless eye and seize him if he
- moved.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the Norse instinct to hate Spain; and I was blood and lineage,
- decisively Norse. That affair of instinct is a mighty matter. It is
- curious to note how one&rsquo;s partisanship will back-track one&rsquo;s racial trail
- and pick up old race feuds and friendships; hating where one&rsquo;s forbears
- hated, loving where they loved. Even as a child, being then a devourer of
- history, I well recall how&mdash;while loathing England as the foe of this
- country&mdash;I still went with her in sympathy was she warring with
- France or Spain. I remember, too, that, in England&rsquo;s civil wars, I was
- ever for the Roundhead and against the King. This, you say, sounds
- strangely for my theory, coming as I do from Virginia, that state of the
- Cavalier. One should reflect that Cavalierism&mdash;to invent a word&mdash;is
- naught save a Southern boast. Virginia, like most seaboard Southern
- states, was in its time a sort of Botany Bay whereunto, with other
- delinquents, political prisoners were condemned; my own ancestors coming,
- in good truth! by edict of the Bloody Jeffreys for the hand they took in
- Monmouth&rsquo;s rebellion. It is true as I state, even as a child, too young
- for emotions save emotions of instinct, I was ever the friend, as I read
- history, first of my own country; and next of England, Germany, Holland,
- Denmark and Sweden-Nor-way&mdash;old race-camps of my forefathers, these&mdash;and
- like those same forefathers the uncompromising foe of France, Spain,
- Italy, and the entire Latin tribe, as soon as ever my reading taught me
- their existence.
- </p>
- <p>
- My filibusterer swung on his cable down the bay from Governor&rsquo;s Island.
- During daylight I held the Harriet Lane at decent distance; when night
- came down I lay as closely by him as I might and give the ships room as
- they swept bow for stern with the tide. Also, we had a small-boat patrol
- in the water.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the fourth day of my watch. I was ashore to stretch my legs, and at
- that particular moment, grown weary of walking, on a bench in Battery
- Park, from which coign I had both my filibusterer and the Harriet Lane
- beneath my eye, and could signal the latter whenever I would.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the bench with me sat a well-dressed stranger; I had before observed
- him during my walk. With an ease that bespoke the trained gentleman, and
- in manner unobtrusive, my fellow bencher stole into talk with me.
- Sharpened of my trade, he had not discoursed a moment before I felt and
- knew his purpose; he was friend to my filibusterer whose black freeboard
- showed broadside on as she tugged and strove with her cable not a mile
- away.
- </p>
- <p>
- He carried the talk to her at last.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t believe she&rsquo;s a filibusterer,&rdquo; he said. Her character was common
- gossip, and he had referred to that. &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t believe she&rsquo;s a
- filibusterer. I&rsquo;d be glad to see her get out if I thought she were,&rdquo; and
- he turned on me a tentative eye.
- </p>
- <p>
- Doubtless he observed a smile, and therein read encouragement. I told him
- my present business; not through vain jauntiness of pride, but I was aware
- that he well knew my mission before ever he sat down, and I thought I&rsquo;d
- fog him up a bit with airs of innocence, and lead him to suppose I
- suspected him not.
- </p>
- <p>
- After much tacking and going about, first port and then starboard&mdash;to
- use the nautical phrase&mdash;he came straight at me.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Friend,&rdquo; he said; &ldquo;the cause of liberty&mdash;Cuban liberty, if you will&mdash;is
- dear to me. If that ship be a filibusterer and meant for Cuba&rsquo;s aid,
- speaking as a humanitarian, I could give you ten thousand reasons, the
- best in the world, why you should let her sail.&rdquo; This last, wistfully.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thereupon I lighted a cigar, having trouble by reason of the breeze. Then
- getting up, I took my handkerchief and wig-wagged the Harriet Lane to send
- the gig ashore. As I prepared to go down to the water-front, I turned to
- my humanitarian who so loved liberty.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Give your reasons to Betelnut Jack,&rdquo; I said; &ldquo;he delights in abstract
- deductions touching the rights of man as against the rights of states as
- deeply as did that Thetford Corset maker, Thomas Paine.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Betelnut Jack!&rdquo; said my humanitarian. &ldquo;He shall have every reason within
- an hour.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Should you convince him,&rdquo; I retorted, &ldquo;tell him as marking a fact in
- which I shall take the utmost interest to come to this spot at five
- o&rsquo;clock and show me his handkerchief.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then I joined the Harriet Lane.
- </p>
- <p>
- At the hour suggested, Betelnut Jack stood on the water&rsquo;s edge and flew
- the signal. I put the captain&rsquo;s glass on him to make sure. He had been
- given the reasons, and was convinced. There abode no doubt of it; the
- humanitarian was right and Cuba should be free. Besides, I remembered
- Madrid and hated Spain.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Captain,&rdquo; I observed, as I handed that dignitary the glasses, &ldquo;we will,
- if you please, lie in the Narrows to-night. If this fellow leave&mdash;which
- he won&rsquo;t&mdash;he&rsquo;ll leave that way. And we&rsquo;ll pinch him.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The Captain bowed. We dropped down to the Narrows as the night fell black
- as pitch. The Captain and I cracked a bottle. As we toasted each other,
- our suspect crept out through the Sound, and by sunrise had long cleared
- Montauk and far and away was southward bound and safe on the open ocean.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I believe,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor to the Sour Gentleman when the
- latter paused, &ldquo;I believe you said that the Filibusterer was in the end
- taken and shot.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Seized when he made his landing,&rdquo; returned the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;and
- killed against a wall in the morning.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It was a cheap finish for a 10,000-dollar start,&rdquo; remarked the Red Nosed
- Gentleman, sententiously. &ldquo;But why should this adventurer, Ryan, as you
- call him, go into the business of freeing Cuba? Where would lie his
- profit? I don&rsquo;t suppose now it was a love of liberty which put him in
- motion.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The Cuban rebellionists,&rdquo; said the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;were from first to
- last sustained by certain business firms in New York who had arranged to
- make money by their success. It is a kind of piracy quite common, this
- setting our Spanish-Americans to cutting throats that a profit may flow in
- Wall and Broad streets. Every revolution and almost every war in South and
- Central America have their inspirations in the counting-rooms of some
- great New York firm. I&rsquo;ve known rival houses in New York to set a pair of
- South American republics to battling with each other like a brace of game
- cocks. Thousands were slain with that war. Sure, it is the merest blackest
- piracy; the deeds of Kidd or Morgan were milk-white by comparison.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It shows also,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;how little the race has
- changed. In our hearts we are the same vikings of savage blood and
- pillage, and with no more of ruth, we were in the day of Harold Fairhair.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Sioux Sam, at the Old Cattleman&rsquo;s suggestion, came now to relate the story
- of &ldquo;How Moh-Kwa Saved the Strike Axe.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0026" id="link2HCH0026"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXVI.&mdash;HOW MOH-KWA SAVED STRIKE-AXE.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>his shall be the
- story of how Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, saved Strike Axe from the medicine of
- Yellow Face, the bad medicine man, who would take his life an&rsquo; steal the
- Feather, his squaw. An&rsquo; it is a story good to show that you should never
- lose a chance to do a kind deed, since kind deeds are the steeps up which
- the Great Spirit makes you climb to reach the happiness at the top. When
- you do good, you climb up; when you do bad, you climb down; an&rsquo; at the top
- is happiness which is white, an&rsquo; at the bottom is pain which is black, an&rsquo;
- the Great Spirit says every man shall take his choice.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe is of the war-clan an&rsquo; is young. Also he is a big fighter next
- to Ugly Elk who is the war chief. An&rsquo; Strike Axe for all he is only a
- young man an&rsquo; has been but four times on the war trail, has already taken
- five skelps&mdash;one Crow, one Blackfoot, three Pawnees. This makes big
- talk among all the Sioux along the Yellowstone, an&rsquo; Strike Axe is proud
- an&rsquo; gay, for he is held a great warrior next to Ugly Elk; an&rsquo; it is the
- Pawnees an&rsquo; Crows an&rsquo; Blackfeet who say this, which makes it better than
- if it is only the talk of the Sioux.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Ugly Elk sets up the war-pole, an&rsquo; calls to his young men to make
- ready to go against the Pawnees to take skelps an&rsquo; steal ponies, Strike
- Axe is the first to beat the war-pole with his stone club, an&rsquo; his war
- pony is the first that is saddled for the start.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe has a squaw an&rsquo; the name of the squaw is the Feather. Of the
- girls of the Sioux, the Feather is one of the most beautiful. Yet she is
- restless an&rsquo; wicked, an&rsquo; thinks plots an&rsquo; is hungry
- </p>
- <p>
- Yellow Face, the bad medicine man, has made a spell over the Feather.
- Yellow Face hates Strike Axe because of so much big talk about him. Also,
- he loves the Feather an&rsquo; would have her for his squaw. He tells her she is
- like the sunset, but she will not hear; then he says she is like the
- sunrise, but still she shakes her head, only she shakes it slow; so at
- last Yellow Face tells her she is like the Wild Rose, an&rsquo; at that she
- laughs an&rsquo; listens.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0016" id="linkimage-0016"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0397.jpg" alt="0397 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0397.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- But the Feather will not leave Strike Axe an&rsquo; go with Yellow Face, for
- Strike Axe is a big fighter; an&rsquo; moreover, he kills many elk an&rsquo; buffalo,
- an&rsquo; his lodge is full of beef an&rsquo; robes, an&rsquo; the Feather is no fool.
- Besides, at this time her heart is not bad, but only restless.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Yellow Face sees he must give her a bad heart or he will never win
- the Feather. So Yellow Face kills the Great Rattlesnake of the Rocks, who
- is his brother medicine, an&rsquo; cooks an&rsquo; feeds his heart to the Feather.
- Then she loves Yellow Face an&rsquo; hates Strike Axe, an&rsquo; would help the Yellow
- Face slay him. For the heart of the Great Rattlesnake of the Rocks is
- evil, an&rsquo; evil breeds evil where it touches, an&rsquo; so the Feather&rsquo;s heart
- turns black like the snake&rsquo;s heart which she swallowed from the hand of
- Yellow Face.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe does not know what the Feather an&rsquo; Yellow Face say an&rsquo; do, for
- he is busy sharpening his lance an&rsquo; making arrows to shoot against the
- Pawnees, an&rsquo; his ears an&rsquo; eyes have no time to run new trails. But Strike
- Axe can tell that the Feather&rsquo;s heart is against him; an&rsquo; this makes him
- to wonder, because he is a big fighter; an&rsquo; besides he has more than any
- Sioux, meat an&rsquo; furs an&rsquo; beads an&rsquo; blankets an&rsquo; paint an&rsquo; feathers, all of
- which are good to the eyes of squaws, an&rsquo; the Feather is no fool. An&rsquo;,
- remembering these things, Strike Axe wonders an&rsquo; wonders; but he cannot
- tell why the heart of the Feather is against him. An&rsquo; at last Strike Axe
- puts away the puzzle of the Feather&rsquo;s heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is a trail in running water,&rdquo; says Strike Axe, &ldquo;an&rsquo; no one may follow
- it. The heart of a squaw is a bird an&rsquo; flies in the air an&rsquo; no one may
- trace it.&rdquo; With that, Strike Axe washes his memory free of the puzzle of
- the Feather&rsquo;s heart an&rsquo; goes away to the big trees by the Yellowstone to
- hunt.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe tells the Feather he will be gone one moon; for now while her
- heart is against him his lodge is cold an&rsquo; his blankets hard an&rsquo; the fire
- no longer burns for Strike Axe, an&rsquo; his own heart is tired to be alone.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is among the big trees by the Yellowstone that Strike Axe meets
- Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, while Moh-Kwa is hunting for a bee tree. But he
- can&rsquo;t find one, an&rsquo; he is sad an&rsquo; hungry an&rsquo; tells Strike Axe he fears the
- bees have gone far away to live with the Pawnees.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Strike Axe says &ldquo;No!&rdquo; an&rsquo; takes Moh-Kwa to a bee-tree he has found;
- an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa sings in his joy, an&rsquo; climbs an&rsquo; eats until he is in pain;
- while Strike Axe stands a long way off, for the bees are angry an&rsquo; their
- knives are out.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa is grateful to Strike Axe when his pain from much honey is gone,
- an&rsquo; says he will come each day, an&rsquo; eat an&rsquo; fight with the bees while
- there is honey left. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa asks Strike Axe to remember that he is
- the Great Wise Bear of the Yellowstone, an&rsquo; to tell him what is evil with
- him so Moh-Kwa can do him good.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe thinks very hard; then he tells Moh-Kwa how the Feather&rsquo;s heart
- is against him an&rsquo; has left him; he would know what the Feather will do
- an&rsquo; where her heart has gone.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa puts his paw above his eyes to keep out the sun so he can think
- better; an&rsquo; soon Moh-Kwa remembers that the wife of the Great Rattlesnake
- of the Rocks, when he met her hunting rats among the cliffs, told him she
- was now a widow, for Yellow Face had killed the Great Rattlesnake of the
- Rocks&mdash;who was his brother medicine&mdash;an&rsquo; fed his heart to the
- Feather.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa tells Strike Axe how the Feather was bewitched by Yellow Face.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Come now with me,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa to Strike Axe, &ldquo;an&rsquo; I will show you what
- the Feather an&rsquo; Yellow Face do while you are gone. You are a young buck
- an&rsquo; a good buck, an&rsquo; because of your youth an&rsquo; the kind deed you did when
- you found for me the bees&mdash;to whom I shall go back an&rsquo; fight with for
- more honey to-morrow and every day while it lasts&mdash;I will show you a
- danger like a lance, an&rsquo; how to hold your shield so you may come safe from
- it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa took Strike Axe by the hand an&rsquo; led him up a deep canyon an&rsquo; into
- his cavern where a big fire burned in the floor&rsquo;s middle for light. An&rsquo;
- bats flew about the roof of Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s cavern an&rsquo; owls sat on points of
- rock high up on the sides an&rsquo; made sad talks; but Strike Axe being brave
- an&rsquo; with a good heart, was not afraid an&rsquo; went close to the fire in the
- floor&rsquo;s middle an&rsquo; sat down.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa got him a fish to eat; an&rsquo; when it was baked on the coals an&rsquo;
- eaten, brought him a pipe with kinnikinick to smoke. When that was done,
- Moh-Kwa said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now that your stomach is full an&rsquo; strong to stand grief, I will show you
- what the Feather an&rsquo; Yellow Face do while you are gone; for they make
- medicine against you an&rsquo; reach out to kill you an&rsquo; take your life.&rdquo;
- Moh-Kwa then turned over a great stone with his black paws an&rsquo; took out of
- a hole which was under the stone, a looking glass. Moh-Kwa gave Strike Axe
- the looking glass an&rsquo; said, &ldquo;Look; for there you shall see the story of
- what the Feather an&rsquo; the wicked Yellow Face do.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe looked, an&rsquo; saw that Yellow Face was wrapping up a log in a
- blanket. When he had done this, he belted it with the belts of Strike Axe;
- an&rsquo; then he put on its head the war-bonnet of Strike Axe which hung on the
- lodge pole. An&rsquo; now that it was finished, Yellow Face said the log in the
- blanket an&rsquo; wearing the belts an&rsquo; war-bonnet was Strike Axe&mdash;as
- Strike Axe saw truly in the looking glass&mdash;an&rsquo; Yellow Face stood up
- the log in its blanket an&rsquo; belts an&rsquo; war-bonnet, an&rsquo; made his bow ready to
- kill it with an arrow. As Yellow Face did these things, the Feather stood
- watching him with a smile on her face while the blood-hope shone in her
- eyes; for she had eaten the snake&rsquo;s heart an&rsquo; all her spirit was black.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe saw what went on with the Feather an&rsquo; Yellow Face, an&rsquo; told it
- as the glass told it, word for word to Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, who sat by
- his side to listen.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Moh-Kwa, when he knew that now Yellow Face with three arrows in his
- left hand was stringing a bow to shoot against the log which he had
- dressed up an&rsquo; named &ldquo;Strike Axe,&rdquo; said there was little time to be lost;
- an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa hurried Strike Axe to the round deep spring of clear water
- which was in the cavern, an&rsquo; told him to stand on the edge of the spring
- an&rsquo; look hard in the looking glass an&rsquo; take sharp notice just as Yellow
- Face was to shoot the arrow against the log.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; you must dive in the spring when Yellow Face shoots,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa to
- Strike Axe; &ldquo;you must dive like the loon dives when you shoot at him on
- the river.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe looked hard in the looking glass like Moh-Kwa said, an&rsquo; dived
- in the spring when the arrow left the bow of Yellow Face.
- </p>
- <p>
- When he came up, he looked again in the glass an&rsquo; saw that Yellow Face had
- missed the log. Yellow Face had a half-fear because he had missed, an&rsquo;
- Strike Axe looking in Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s glass could see the half-fear rising up as
- a mist in his eyes like a morning fog lifts up from the Yellowstone. Also,
- the Feather stood watching Yellow Face, an&rsquo; her eyes, which were grown
- hard an&rsquo; little an&rsquo; bright, like a snake&rsquo;s eyes, showed that she did not
- care what happened only so that it was evil.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Kwa told Strike Axe to still watch closely, an&rsquo; would not let his
- mind pull up its pickets an&rsquo; stray; because Yellow Face would shoot twice
- more with the arrows which were left; an&rsquo; he must be quick an&rsquo; ready each
- time to dive like the loon dives, or he would surely die by the log&rsquo;s
- wound.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe, because he had eaten the fish an&rsquo; smoked, an&rsquo; had a full
- stomach an&rsquo; was bold an&rsquo; steady with a heart made brave with much food,
- again looked hard in the glass; an&rsquo; when the second arrow left the bow of
- Yellow Face he dived sharply in the spring like a loon; an&rsquo; when he came
- up an&rsquo; held the looking glass before his eyes he saw that Yellow Face had
- missed the log a second time.
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; now there was a whole-fear in the eyes of Yellow Face&mdash;a white
- fear that comes when a man sees Pau-guk, the Death, walk into the lodge;
- an&rsquo; the hand of Yellow Face trembled as he made ready his last third arrow
- on the bow. But in the eyes of the Feather shone no fear; only she lapped
- out her tongue like the snake does, with the black pleasure of new evil at
- the door.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa warned Strike Axe to look only at Yellow Face that he might be
- sure an&rsquo; swift as the loon to dive from the last arrow. Strike Axe did as
- Moh-Kwa counselled; an&rsquo; when the last arrow flew from the bow, Strike Axe
- with a big splash was safe an&rsquo; deep beneath the waters of the spring.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; now,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa to Strike Axe, &ldquo;look in the glass an&rsquo; laugh, for a
- blessing of revenge has been bestowed on you through the Great Spirit.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe looked an&rsquo; saw that not only did Yellow Face miss the log, but
- the arrow flew back an&rsquo; pierced the throat of Yellow Face, even up to the
- three eagle feathers on the arrow&rsquo;s shaft. As Strike Axe looked, he saw
- Yellow Face die; an&rsquo; a feeling like the smell of new grass came about the
- heart of Strike Axe, for there is nothing so warm an&rsquo; sweet an&rsquo; quick with
- peace as revenge when it sees an&rsquo; smells the fresh blood of its enemy.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa told Strike Axe to still look in the glass; for while the danger
- was gone he would know what the Feather did when now that Yellow Face was
- killed by the turning of his own medicine.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe looked, an&rsquo; saw how the Feather dammed up the water in a little
- brook near the lodge; an&rsquo; when the bed of the brook was free of water the
- Feather dug a hole in the soft ground with her hands like a wolf digs with
- his paws. An&rsquo; the Feather made it deep an&rsquo; long an&rsquo; wide; an&rsquo; then she put
- the dead Yellow Face in this grave in the brook&rsquo;s bed. When she had
- covered him with sand an&rsquo; stones, the Feather let the waters free; an&rsquo; the
- brook went back to its old trail which it loved, an&rsquo; laughed an&rsquo; ran on,
- never caring about the dead Yellow Face who lay under its wet feet.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then the Feather went again into the lodge an&rsquo; undressed the log of its
- blankets, belts an&rsquo; war-bonnet; an&rsquo; the Feather burned the bow an&rsquo; the
- arrows of Yellow Face, an&rsquo; made everything as it was before. Only now
- Yellow Face lay dead under the brook; but no one knew, an&rsquo; the brook
- itself already had forgot&mdash;for the brook&rsquo;s memory is slippery an&rsquo;
- thin an&rsquo; not a good memory, holding nothing beyond a moment&mdash;an&rsquo; the
- Feather felt safe an&rsquo; happy; for her heart fed on evil an&rsquo; evil had been
- done.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe came out from the cave with Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You have given me life,&rdquo; said Strike Axe.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You have given me honey,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Strike Axe was troubled in his mind, an&rsquo; he told Moh-Kwa that he knew
- not what he must do with the Feather when he returned. But Moh-Kwa said
- that he should make his breast light, an&rsquo; free his thought of the Feather
- as a burden, for one would be in his lodge before him with the answer to
- his question.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is the Widow,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;who was the wife of the Great
- Rattlesnake of the Rocks; she will go to your tepee to be close to the
- heart of her husband. In her mouth the Widow will bring a message from
- Yellow Face to the Feather for whom he died an&rsquo; was hid beneath the
- careless brook.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus said Moh-Kwa. An&rsquo; Strike Axe found that Moh-Kwa spoke with but one
- tongue; for when he stood again in his lodge the Feather lay across the
- door, dead an&rsquo; black with the message of Yellow Face which was sent to her
- in the mouth of the Widow. An&rsquo; as Strike Axe looked on the Feather, the
- Widow rattled joyfully where she lay coiled on the Feather&rsquo;s breast; for
- the Widow was glad because she was near to her husband&rsquo;s heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Kwa was not there to look; Moh-Kwa had gone early to the bee-tree,
- an&rsquo; now with his nose in a honey comb was high an&rsquo; hearty up among the
- angry bees.
- </p>
- <p>
- There arose no little approbative comment on the folk-lore tales of Sioux
- Sam, and it was common opinion that his were by odds and away the best
- stories to be told among us. These hearty plaudits were not without
- pleasant effect on Sioux Sam, and one might see his dark cheek flush to a
- color darker still with the joy he felt.
- </p>
- <p>
- And yet someone has said how the American Indian is stolid and cold.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the Red Nosed Gentleman, as the clock struck midnight on this our
- last evening and we threw our last log on the coals, who suggested that
- the Jolly Doctor, having told the first story, should in all propriety
- close in the procession by furnishing the last. There was but one voice
- for it, and the Jolly Doctor, who would have demurred for that it seemed
- to lack of modesty on his side, in the end conceded the point with grace.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, composing himself to a comfortable position
- in his great chair, &ldquo;this, then, shall be the story of &lsquo;The Flim Flam
- Murphy.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0027" id="link2HCH0027"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXVII.&mdash;THE FLIM FLAM MURPHY.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">C</span>hicken Bill was
- not beautiful with his shock of coarse hair and foul pipe in mouth.
- Doubtless, Chicken Bill was likewise an uncompromising villain. Indeed,
- Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin, expert both of men and mines, one evening in the Four
- Flush saloon, casually, but with insulting fullness, set these things
- forth to Chicken Bill himself; and while Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin was always
- talking, he was not always wrong.
- </p>
- <p>
- On this occasion of Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin&rsquo;s frankness, Chicken Bill, albeit
- he carried contradiction at his belt in the shape of a six-shooter, walked
- away without attempting either denial or reproof. This conduct, painful to
- the sentiment of Timberline, had the two-fold effect of confirming Pike&rsquo;s
- Peak Martin&rsquo;s utterances in the minds of men, and telling against the
- repute of Chicken Bill for that personal courage which is the great first
- virtue the Southwest demands.
- </p>
- <p>
- Old Man Granger found the earliest gold in Arizona Gulch. And hot on the
- news of the strike came Chicken Bill. It was the latter&rsquo;s boast about the
- bar-rooms of Timberline that he was second to come into the canyon; and as
- this was the only word of truth of which Chicken Bill was guilty while he
- honored the camp with his presence, it deserves a record.
- </p>
- <p>
- Following Old Man Granger&rsquo;s discovery of his Old Age mine, came not only
- Chicken Bill, but others; within a week there arose the bubbling camp of
- Timberline. There were saloons and hurdy-gurdies and stores and
- restaurants and a bank and a corral and a stage station and an express
- office and a post-office and an assay office and board sidewalks and red
- lights and many another plain evidence of civilization. Even a theatre was
- threatened; and, to add to the gayety as well as the wealth of the baby
- metropolis, those sundry cattlemen having ranges and habitats within the
- oak-brushed hills about, began to make Timberline their headquarters and
- transact their business and their debauches in its throbbing midst.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0017" id="linkimage-0017"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0411.jpg" alt="0411 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0411.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill was reasonably perfect in all accomplishments of the
- Southwest. He could work cattle; he could rope, throw, and hog-tie his
- steer; he could keep up his end at flanking, branding, and ear-marking in
- a June corral; he could saddle and ride a wild, unbroken bronco; he could
- make baking-powder biscuit so well flavored and light as to compel the
- compliments of those jealous epicures of the cow-camps who devoured them.
- </p>
- <p>
- Yet Chicken Bill would not work on the ranges. There were no cards
- permitted in the camps, and whiskey was debarred as if each bottle held a
- rattlesnake. Altogether a jovial soul, and one given to revelry, would fly
- from them in disgust.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s too lonesome a play for me, this punchin&rsquo; cattle,&rdquo; observed Chicken
- Bill, and so eschewed it.
- </p>
- <p>
- While Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin expounded this aversion on the part of Chicken
- Bill, as well as the latter&rsquo;s refusal to pick and dig and drill and blast
- in the Timberline mines, as mere laziness, public feeling, though it
- despised the culprit, was inclined to tolerate him in his shiftlessness.
- American independence in the Southwest is held to be inclusive of the
- personal right to refuse all forms of labor. Wherefore Chicken Bill was
- safe even from criticism as he hung about the saloons and faro rooms and
- lived his life of chosen vagabondage.
- </p>
- <p>
- Our low-flung hero made shift in various ways. Did he find a tenderfoot
- whom he could cheat at cards, he borrowed a stake&mdash;sometimes, when
- the subject was uncommonly tender, from the victim himself&mdash;and
- therewith took a small sum at poker or seven-up. Another method of trivial
- fraud, now and then successful with Chicken Bill, was to plant a handful
- of brass nuggets, each of about an ounce in weight, under a little
- waterfall that broke into the canyon just below the windmill. There was a
- deal of mineral in this feeble side-stream, and the brass nuggets became
- coated and queer of color.
- </p>
- <p>
- One of these Chicken Bill was able at intervals to impose at a profit upon
- a stranger, by swearing doughtily that it was virgin gold.
- </p>
- <p>
- It came to pass, however, that Chicken Bill, despairing of fortune by the
- cheap processes of penny-ante and spurious nuggets, decided on a coup. He
- would stake out a claim, drift it and timber it, and then salt it to the
- limit of all that was possible in the science of claim-salting. Then would
- he sell it to the first Christian with more money than sagacity who came
- moved to buy a mine.
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill was no amateur of mines. He knew the business as he knew the
- cow trade, and avoided it for the same reason of indolence. In his time,
- and after some windfall at faro-bank, Chicken Bill had grub-staked
- prospectors who were to &ldquo;give him half&rdquo; and who never came back. In his
- turn Chicken Bill was grub-staked by others, in which event he never came
- back. But it went with other experiences to teach him the trade, and on
- the morning when with pick and paraphernalia Chicken Bill pitched camp in
- Arizona Gulch a mile beyond the farthest, and where it was known to all no
- mineral lurked, he brought with him a knowledge of the miner&rsquo;s art, and
- began his digging with intelligent spirit. Moreover, the heart of Chicken
- Bill was stout for the work; for was he not planning a swindle? and did
- not that thought of itself swell his bosom with a mighty peace?
- </p>
- <p>
- Once upon a time Chicken Bill had had a partner.
- </p>
- <p>
- This partner was frequently on the lips of Chicken Bill, especially when
- our hero was in his cups. He was always mentioned with a gush of tears,
- this partner, and his name as furnished by Chicken Bill was Flim Flam
- Murphy. Flim Flam had met death somewhere in the Gunnison country while
- making good his name, and passed with the smoke of the Colt&rsquo;s-44 that
- dismissed him. But Chicken Bill reverenced the memory of this talented man
- and was ready to honor him, and, having staked out his claim with the
- fraudulent purpose aforesaid, filed on it appropriately as &ldquo;The Flim Flam
- Murphy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It would be unjust to the intelligence of Timberline to permit one for a
- moment to suppose that the dullest of her male citizenry lived unaware of
- the ignoble plans of Chicken Bill. That he proposed to salt a claim and
- therewith ensnare the stranger within the local gates were truths which
- all men knew. But all men cared not; and mention of the enterprise when
- the miracle of Chicken Bill at work found occasional comment over the
- bars, aroused nothing save a sluggish curiosity as to whether Chicken Bill
- would succeed. No thought of warning the unwary arose in the Timberline
- heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s the proper play,&rdquo; observed Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin, representative of
- Timberline feeling, &ldquo;to let every gent seelect his own licker an&rsquo; hobble
- his own hoss. If Chicken Bill can down anybody for his bankroll without
- making a gun play to land the trick, thar&rsquo;s no call for the public to
- interfere.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was about this time that Chicken Bill added to his ornate scheme of
- claim-salting&mdash;a plain affair of the heart. The lady to thus cast her
- spell over Chicken Bill was known as Deadwood Maggie and flourished a
- popular waitress in the Belle Union Hotel. Timberline thought well of
- Deadwood Maggie, and her place in general favor found suggestion in a
- remark of Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Deadwood Maggie,&rdquo; observed that excellent spirit, as he replaced his
- glass on the Four Flush bar and turned to an individual who had been
- guilty of words derogatory to the lady in question; &ldquo;Dead-wood Maggie is a
- virchoous young female, an&rsquo; it shore frets me to hear her lightly allooded
- to.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin&rsquo;s disapproval took the violent form of smiting the
- maligner upon the head with an 8-inch pistol, the social status of the
- lady was ever after regarded as fixed.
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill was not the one to eat his heart in silence, and his passion
- was but one day old when he laid hand and fortune at Deadwood Maggie&rsquo;s
- feet. That maiden for her part displayed a suspicious front, born perhaps
- of an experience of the perfidy of man. Deadwood Maggie was inclined to a
- scorn of Chicken Bill and his proffer of instant wedlock.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Not on your life!&rdquo; was Deadwood Maggie&rsquo;s reply.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Chicken Bill persisted; he longed more ardently because of this
- rebuff. To soften Deadwood Maggie he threw a gallant arm about her and
- drew her to his bosom.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Don&rsquo;t be in sech a hurry to lose me,&rdquo; said Chicken Bill on this
- sentimental occasion.
- </p>
- <p>
- Deadwood Maggie was arranging tables at the time for those guests who from
- mine and store and bar-room would come, stamping and famishing, an hour
- later. Chicken Bill and she for the moment had the apartment to
- themselves. Goaded by her lover&rsquo;s sweet persistency, and unable to phrase
- a retort that should do her feelings justice, Deadwood Maggie fell to the
- trite expedient of breaking a butter-dish on the head of Chicken Bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now pull your freight,&rdquo; said she, &ldquo;or I&rsquo;ll chunk you up with all the
- crockery in the camp.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Finding Deadwood Maggie obdurate, Chicken Bill for the nonce withdrew to
- consider the situation. He was in no sort dispirited; he regarded the
- butter-dish and those threats which came after it as marks of maiden
- coyness; they were decisive of nothing.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;She wasn&rsquo;t in the mood,&rdquo; said Chicken Bill, as he explained his repulse
- to the bar-keeper of the Four Flush Saloon; &ldquo;but I&rsquo;ll get my lariat on her
- yet. Next time I&rsquo;ll rope with a larger loop.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s the racket!&rdquo; said the bar-keeper.
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill in a small way was a gifted rascal. After profound
- contemplation of Deadwood Maggie in her obstinacy, he determined to win
- her with the conveyance of a one-quarter interest in The Flim Flam Murphy.
- Deadwood Maggie knew nothing of the worthlessness of The Flim Flam Murphy.
- Chicken Bill would represent it to her as a richer strike than Old Man
- Granger&rsquo;s Old Age Mine. He would give her one-quarter. There would be no
- risk; Deadwood Maggie, when once his wife and getting a good figure for
- the mine, would make no demur to selling to whatever tenderfoot he might
- dupe. This plan had merit; at least one must suppose so, for the soul of
- Deadwood Maggie was visibly softened thereby.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I must have you, Maggie,&rdquo; wooed Chicken Bill, when he had put forth the
- sterling character of The Flim Flam Murphy and expressed himself as
- determined to bestow on her the one-fourth interest, a conveyance whereof
- in writing he held then in his hand; &ldquo;I can&rsquo;t live without you. When you
- busted me with that yootensil you made me yours forever. I swear by this
- gun I pack, I&rsquo;ll not outlive your refusal to wed me longer than to jest
- get good an&rsquo; drunk an&rsquo; put a bullet through my head.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Who could resist such love and such hyperbole? Deadwood Maggie wept; then
- she took the deed to the one-fourth interest in The Flim Flam Murphy,
- kissed Chicken Bill, and said she would drift into his arms as his wife at
- the end of two months. Chicken Bill objected strenuously to such a recess
- for his affections, but with the last of it was driven to yield.
- </p>
- <p>
- There came a time when The Flim Flam Murphy salted to the last degree of
- salt was as perfect a trap for a tenderfoot as any ever set. And as though
- luck were seeking Chicken Bill, a probable prey stepped from the stage
- next day.
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill and the stranger were seen in prompt and lengthy conference.
- Timberline, looking on, grinned in a tolerant way. For two days Chicken
- Bill and the stranger did nothing but explore the drift, inspect the
- timbering, and consider specimens taken from The Flim Flam Murphy.
- </p>
- <p>
- At last the stranger filled ten small canvas sacks with specimens of ore
- and brought them into camp on a buckboard to be assayed. Chicken Bill was
- with him; and pleading internal pains that made it impossible to ride
- upright, our wily one lay back with the bags of specimens while the
- stranger drove. From time to time the astute Chicken Bill, having
- advantage of rough places in the canyon&rsquo;s bed which engaged the faculties
- of the stranger, emptied some two or three quills of powdered gold into
- each specimen sack by the ingenius process of forcing the sharpened point
- of the quill through the web of the canvas, and blowing the treasure in
- among the ore.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s a cinch!&rdquo; ruminated Chicken Bill, when he had completed these
- improvements. Then he refreshed himself from a whiskey flask, said that he
- felt better, and climbed back beside the stranger on the buckboard&rsquo;s seat.
- </p>
- <p>
- There came the assay next day. With that ceremony Chicken Bill had nothing
- to do, and could only wait. But he owned no misgivings; there would come
- but one result; the ore would show a richness not to be resisted.
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill put in his time preparing Deadwood Maggie for the sale. He
- told her that not a cent less than sixty thousand dollars would be
- accepted.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s worth more,&rdquo; declared Chicken Bill, &ldquo;but me an&rsquo; you, Maggie, ain&rsquo;t
- got the long green to develop it. Our best play is to cash in if we can
- get the figure.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But disaster was striding on the trail of Chicken Bill. That evening, as
- Deadwood Maggie was returning to the Belle Union from the Dutch Woman&rsquo;s
- Store, to which mart she had been driven for a tooth-brush, she was
- blasted with the spectacle of Chicken Bill and a Mexican girl in
- confidential converse just ahead. Deadwood Maggie, a bit violent of
- nature, had been in no wise calmed by her several years on the border.
- While not wildly in love, still her impulse was to dismantle, if not
- dismember, the senorita thus softly whispering and being whispered to by
- the recreant Chicken Bill. But on second thought Deadwood Maggie
- restrained herself. She would observe the full untruth of Chicken Bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0018" id="linkimage-0018"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0421.jpg" alt="0421 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0421.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- The next day, when Chicken Bill called on Dead-wood Maggie, he was met
- with a smothering flight of table furniture and told never to come back.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was a crisis with Chicken Bill. The assay had been a victory and the
- stranger stood ready, cash in hand, to pay the sixty thousand dollars
- demanded for The Flim Flam Murphy. Chicken Bill felt the necessity of
- getting the money without delay. Any marplot, whether from drink or that
- mean officiousness which hypocrites call &ldquo;conscience,&rdquo; might say the word
- that would arm the tenderfoot with a knowledge of his peril. But Chicken
- Bill could not come to speech with Dead-wood Maggie. In a blaze of
- jealousy, that wronged woman would begin throwing things the moment he
- appeared. As a last resort, Chicken Bill dispatched the bar-keeper of the
- Four Flush to Dead-wood Maggie. This diplomat was told to set forth the
- crying needs of the hour, Chicken Bill promising friendship for life and
- five hundred dollars if he made Deadwood Maggie see reason.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ten minutes later the bar-keeper returned, bleeding from a cut over his
- eye.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Did it with a stove-lifter,&rdquo; he explained, as he laved the wound in a
- basin at the corner of the bar. &ldquo;Say! you can&rsquo;t get near enough to that
- lady to give her a diamond ring.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill made a gesture of despair; he saw that Deadwood Maggie was
- lost to him forever.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the sale of The Flim Flam Murphy must go on. Chicken Bill sought the
- tenderfoot. He found him with a smile on his face reading the report of
- The Flim Flam Murphy assay. Chicken Bill guardedly explained that he had a
- partner, name not given, who objected to the sale. The partner held a
- one-quarter share in The Flim Flam Murphy. The stranger, who knew it all
- along from the records, pondered briefly. Finally he broke the silence:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Would Chicken Bill sell his three-quarters?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill composed his face. Chicken Bill would sell.
- </p>
- <p>
- Nothing is big in the Southwest; transactions of millions are disposed of
- while one eats a flap-jack. In an hour the stranger had acquired The Flim
- Flam Murphy interest which was vested in Chicken Bill; in two hours that
- immoralist was speeding by vague trails to regions new, forty-five
- thousand dollars in his belt and a soreness in his heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- Timberline felt a quiet amusement in the situation. It leaned back and
- waited in a superior way for the stranger to set up the low wail of the
- robbed. The outcry couldn&rsquo;t be long deferred; the fraud must be soon
- unmasked since the development of The Flim Flam Murphy was gone about with
- diligence and on a dazzling scale.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the stranger did not complain.
- </p>
- <p>
- Two weeks were added to that vast eternity which had preceded them and the
- sobered sentiment of Timberline began to think it might better
- investigate. Timberline, however, would proceed with caution; missing its
- laugh, it must now guard itself against being laughed at.
- </p>
- <p>
- It turned as the wise ones had begun to apprehend. The Flim Flam Murphy
- was a two-million dollar wonder. The talented Chicken Bill had overreached
- himself. With no hope beyond a plan to salt a claim, he had not thought to
- secure an assay for himself. The Flim Flam Murphy loomed upon mankind as
- Timberline&rsquo;s richest strike.
- </p>
- <p>
- Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin was the first to collect himself. Crawling from beneath
- that landslide of amazement which had caught and covered Timberline, he
- visited the Belle Union with a resolved air. Pointedly but fully Pike&rsquo;s
- Peak Martin tendered himself in marriage to Dead wood Maggie. That lady
- did not hurl a butter-dish; such feats would seem too effervescent on the
- part of a gentlewoman worth five hundred thousand dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- Deadwood Maggie blushed with drooping lids as she heard the words of
- Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which your offer shore makes a hit with me,&rdquo; murmured Deadwood Maggie.
- Then, when a moment later, her head lay on Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin&rsquo;s shoulder
- like some tired flower at rest, Deadwood Maggie gave a sigh, and lifting
- her eyes to the deep inquiring gaze of Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin, she whispered:
- &ldquo;You&rsquo;re the only gent I ever loved.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <h3>
- THE END.
- </h3>
- <div style="height: 6em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-<pre>
-
-
-
-
-
-End of Project Gutenberg's The Black Lion Inn, by Alfred Henry Lewis
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-<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" lang="en">
- <head>
- <title>THE BLACK LION INN, By Alfred Henry Lewis</title>
- <meta content="pg2html (binary v0.17)" />
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-<pre>
-
-The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Black Lion Inn, by Alfred Henry Lewis
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
-other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
-the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
-to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
-
-
-
-Title: The Black Lion Inn
-
-Author: Alfred Henry Lewis
-
-Illustrator: Frederic Remington
-
-Release Date: August 31, 2017 [EBook #55471]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE BLACK LION INN ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by David Widger from page images generously
-provided by the Internet Archive
-
-
-
-
-
-
-</pre>
-
- <div style="height: 8em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h1>
- THE BLACK LION INN
- </h1>
- <h2>
- By Alfred Henry Lewis
- </h2>
- <h3>
- Illustrated By Frederic Remington
- </h3>
- <h4>
- New York: R. H. Russell
- </h4>
- <h3>
- 1903
- </h3>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0001" id="linkimage-0001"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0001.jpg" alt="0001 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0001.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0002" id="linkimage-0002"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0008.jpg" alt="0008 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0008.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0003" id="linkimage-0003"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0009.jpg" alt="0009 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0009.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- <b>CONTENTS</b>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0001"> CHAPTER I.&mdash;HOW I CAME TO THE INN. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0002"> CHAPTER II.&mdash;THE WINNING OF SAUCY PAOLI.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0003"> CHAPTER III.&mdash;HOW FORKED TONGUE WAS BURNED.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0004"> CHAPTER IV.&mdash;THAT TOBACCO UPSET. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0005"> CHAPTER V.&mdash;THE SIGN OF THREE. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0006"> CHAPTER VI.&mdash;THAT WOLFVILLE CHRISTMAS. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0007"> CHAPTER VII.&mdash;THE PITT STREET STRINGENCY.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0008"> CHAPTER VIII.&mdash;THAT STOLEN ACE OF HEARTS.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0009"> CHAPTER IX.&mdash;CHIQUITA OF CHAPARITA. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0010"> CHAPTER X.&mdash;HOW STRONGARM WAS AN ELK. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0011"> CHAPTER XI.&mdash;THAT SMUGGLED SILK. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0012"> CHAPTER XII.&mdash;THE WIPING OUT OF McCANDLAS.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0013"> CHAPTER XIII.&mdash;HOW JIM BRITT PASSED HIS
- BILL. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0014"> CHAPTER XIV.&mdash;HOW TO TELL THE LAST FOUR.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0015"> CHAPTER XV.&mdash;HOW MOH-KWA FED THE CATFISH.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0016"> CHAPTER XVI.&mdash;THE EMPEROR&rsquo;S CIGARS. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0017"> CHAPTER XVII.&mdash;THE GREAT STEWART CAMPAIGN.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0018"> CHAPTER XVIII.&mdash;THE RESCUE OF CONNELLY. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0019"> CHAPTER XIX.&mdash;MOH-KWA AND THE THREE GIFTS.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0020"> CHAPTER XX.&mdash;THE GERMAN GIRL&rsquo;S DIAMONDS.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0021"> CHAPTER XXI.&mdash;THE LUCK OF COLD-SOBER SIMMS.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0022"> CHAPTER XXII.&mdash;HOW PRINCE RUPERT LOST. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0023"> CHAPTER XXIII.&mdash;WHEN I RAN THE SHOTGUN. </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0024"> CHAPTER XXIV.&mdash;WHEN THE CAPITOL WAS MOVED.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0025"> CHAPTER XXV.&mdash;HOW THE FILIBUSTERER SAILED.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0026"> CHAPTER XXVI.&mdash;HOW MOH-KWA SAVED STRIKE-AXE.
- </a>
- </p>
- <p class="toc">
- <a href="#link2HCH0027"> CHAPTER XXVII.&mdash;THE FLIM FLAM MURPHY. </a>
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0001" id="link2HCH0001"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER I.&mdash;HOW I CAME TO THE INN.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">Y</span>ears ago, I came
- upon an old and hoary tavern when I as a fashion of refugee was flying
- from strong drink. Its name, as shown on the creaking sign-board, was The
- Black Lion Inn. My coming was the fruit of no plan; the hostelry was
- strange to me, and my arrival, casual and desultory, one of those
- accidents which belong with the experiences of folk who, whipped of a bad
- appetite and running from rum, are seeking only to be solitary and win a
- vacation for their selfrespect. This latter commodity in my own poor case
- had been sadly overworked, and called for rest and an opportunity of
- recuperation. Wherefore, going quietly and without word from the great
- city, I found this ancient inn with a purpose to turn presently sober.
- Also by remaining secluded for a space I would permit the memory of those
- recent dubious exploits of the cup to become a bit dimmed in the bosom of
- my discouraged relatives.
- </p>
- <p>
- It turned a most fortunate blunder, this blundering discovery of the aged
- inn, for it was here I met the Jolly Doctor who, by saving me from my fate
- of a drunkard, a fate to which I was hopelessly surrendered, will dwell
- ever in my thoughts as a greatest benefactor.
- </p>
- <p>
- There is that about an appetite for alcohol I can not understand. In my
- personal instance there is reason to believe it was inherited. And yet my
- own father never touched a drop and lived and died the uncompromising
- enemy of the bowl. It was from my grandsire, doubtless, I had any
- hankering after rum, for I have heard a sigh or two of how that dashing
- military gentleman so devoted himself to it that he fairly perished for
- very faithfulness as far away as eighty odd long years.
- </p>
- <p>
- Once when my father and I were roaming the snow-filled woods with our guns&mdash;I
- was a lad of twelve&mdash;having heard little of that ancestor, I asked
- him what malady carried off my grandsire. My father did not reply at once,
- but stalked silently ahead, rifle caught under arm, the snow crunching
- beneath his heavy boots. Then he flung a sentence over his shoulder.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Poor whiskey more than anything else,&rdquo; said my father.
- </p>
- <p>
- Even at the unripe age of twelve I could tell how the subject was
- unpleasant to my parent and did not press it. I saved my curiosity until
- evening when my mother and I were alone. My mother, to whom I re-put the
- query, informed me in whispers how she had been told&mdash;for she never
- met him, he being dead and gone before her day&mdash;my grandsire threw
- away his existence upon the bottle.
- </p>
- <p>
- The taste for strong waters so developed in my grandsire would seem like a
- quartz-ledge to have &ldquo;dipped&rdquo; beneath my father to strike the family
- surface with all its old-time richness in myself. I state this the more
- secure of its truth because I was instantly and completely a drunkard,
- waiving every preliminary stage as a novice, from the moment of my first
- glass.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was my first day of the tavern when I met the Jolly Doctor. The tavern
- was his home&mdash;for he lived a perilous bachelor&mdash;and had been
- many years; and when, being in a shaken state, I sent down from the
- apartments I had taken and requested the presence of a physician, he came
- up to me. He had me right and on my feet in the course of a few hours, and
- then I began to look him in the face and make his acquaintance.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I abode in the tavern for a considerable space, we put in many friendly
- hours together. The Jolly Doctor was a round, strong, active body of a
- man, virile and with an atmosphere almost hypnotic. His forehead was good,
- his jaw hard, his nose arched, while his gray-blue eyes, half sour, half
- humorous and deeply wise of the world, gleamed in his head with the shine
- of beads.
- </p>
- <p>
- One evening while we were together about the fireplace of my parlor, I was
- for having up a bottle of sherry.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Before you give the order,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, restraining me with a
- friendly yet semiprofessional gesture, &ldquo;let me say a word. Let me ask
- whether you have an intention or even a hope of one day&mdash;no matter
- how distant&mdash;quitting alcohol?&rdquo; Without pausing for my answer, the
- Jolly Doctor went on. &ldquo;You are yet a young man; I suppose you have seen
- thirty years. It has been my experience, albeit I&rsquo;m but fifteen years your
- senior and not therefore as old as a hill, that no man uproots a habit
- after he has reached middle age. While climbing, mentally, physically,
- nervously, the slope of his years and adding to, not taking from, his
- strength, a man may so far re-draw himself as to make or break an appetite&mdash;the
- appetite of strong drink&mdash;if you will. But let him attain the summit
- of his strength, reach as it were the crest of his days and begin to
- travel down the easy long descent toward the grave, and every chance of
- change has perished beyond his reach. You are thirty; and to make it
- short, my friend, you must, considering what bottle tendencies lie latent
- within you, stop now and stop hard, or you are lost forever.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- To say I was impressed is not to exaggerate. I was frank enough to
- confess, however, that privately I held no hope of change. Several years
- before, I had become convinced, after a full survey of myself and the
- close study of my inclinations, that I was born to live and die, like my
- grandsire, the victim of drink. I was its thrall, bound to it as I lay in
- my cradle; there existed no gate of escape. This I told; not joyously, I
- promise you, or as one reciting good fortune; not argumentatively and as
- reason for the forthcoming of asked-for wine; but because it was true and
- made, as I held it, a reason for going in this matter of tipple with
- freest rein since dodge or balk my fate I might not.
- </p>
- <p>
- At the close my Jolly Doctor shook his head in negative.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;No man knows his destiny,&rdquo; said he, &ldquo;until the game&rsquo;s played out. Come,
- let me prescribe for you. The drug I have in mind has cured folk; I should
- add, too, that for some it carries neither power nor worth. Still, it will
- do no harm, and since we may have a test of its virtues within three days;
- at the worst you will be called upon to surrender no more than seventy-two
- hours to sobriety.&rdquo; This last was delivered like a cynic.
- </p>
- <p>
- On my side, I not only thanked the Jolly Doctor for his concern, but
- hastened to assure him I would willingly make pact to abstain from alcohol
- not three days, but three weeks or three months, were it necessary to
- pleasure his experiment. My bent for drink was in that degree peculiar
- that I was not so much its disciple who must worship constantly and every
- day, as one of those who are given to sprees. Often and of choice I was a
- stranger to so much as the odor of rum for weeks on end. Then would come
- other weeks of tumult and riot and drunkenness. The terms of trial for his
- medicine would be easily and comfortably undergone by me. He had my
- promise of three days free of rum.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Jolly Doctor went to his room; returning, he placed on the table a
- little bottle of liquid, reddish in color and bitter of taste.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Red cinchona, it is,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor; &ldquo;cinchona rubra, or rather
- the fluid extract of that bark. It is not a tincture; there is no alcohol
- about it. The remedy is well known and I oft marvel it has had no wider
- vogue. As I&rsquo;ve told you, and on the principle, probably, that one man&rsquo;s
- poison is another man&rsquo;s food, it does not always cure. However, we will
- give you a teaspoonful once in three hours and observe the effect in your
- particular case.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- There shall be little more related on this point of dypsomania and its
- remedy. I took the prescription for a trio of days. At the expiration I
- sate me solemnly down and debated within myself whether or no I craved
- strong drink, with the full purpose of calling for it if I did.
- Absolutely, the anxiety was absent; and since I had resolved not to force
- the bottle upon myself, but to give the Jolly Doctor and his drug all
- proper show to gain a victory, I made no alcohol demands. All this was
- years ago, and from that hour until now, when I write these lines, I&rsquo;ve
- neither taken nor wanted alcohol. I&rsquo;ve gone freely where it was, and abode
- for hours at tables when others poured and tossed it off; for myself I&rsquo;ve
- craved none and taken none.
- </p>
- <p>
- Toward the last of my stay, there came to dwell at the hostelry a goodly
- circle; one for a most part chance-sown. For days it had been snowing with
- a free, persistent hand; softly, industriously, indomitably fell the
- flakes, straight down and unflurried of a wind, until the cold light
- element lay about the tavern for a level depth of full three feet. It was
- the sort of weather in which one should read Whittier&rsquo;s Snow-Bound.
- </p>
- <p>
- Our circle, as snow-pent and held within door we drew about the tavern
- fire, offered a chequered citizenry. On the earliest occasion of our
- comradeship, while the snow sifted about the old-fashioned panes and
- showed through them with the whiteness of milk, I cast my eye over the
- group to collect for myself a mental picture of my companions.
- </p>
- <p>
- At the right hand of the Jolly Doctor, solid in his arm chair, sat a Red
- Nosed Gentleman. He showed prosperous of this world&rsquo;s goods and owned to a
- warm weakness for burgundy. He was particular to keep ever a bottle at his
- elbow, and constantly supported his interest in what was current with a
- moderate glass.
- </p>
- <p>
- In sharpest contrast to the Red Nosed Gentleman there should be mentioned
- a gray old gentleman of sour and forbidding eye. The Jolly Doctor, who had
- known him for long, gave me in a whisper his story. This Sour Gentleman,
- like the Red Nosed Gentleman, had half retired from the cares of business.
- The Red Nosed Gentleman in his later days had been a stock speculator, as
- in sooth had the Sour Gentleman, and each would still on occasion carry a
- few thousand shares for a week or two and then swoop on a profit with
- quite the eagerness of any hawk on any hen.
- </p>
- <p>
- Not to be overlooked, in a corner nearest the chimney was a seamed white
- old figure, tall and spare, yet with vigorous thews still strung in the
- teeth of his all but four score years. He was referred to during our
- amiable captivity, and while we sate snow-locked about the mighty
- fire-place, as the Old Cattleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- Half comrade and half ward, our Old Cattleman had with him a taciturn,
- grave individual, to whom he gave the title of &ldquo;Sioux Sam,&rdquo; and whose
- father, he informed us, had been a French trader from St. Louis, while his
- mother was a squaw of the tribe that furnished the first portion of his
- name.
- </p>
- <p>
- As we brought arm chairs about the fire-place on our first snow-bound
- evening, moved possibly by the Red Nosed Gentleman&rsquo;s burgundy, which that
- florid person had urged upon his attention, the Jolly Doctor set the
- little community a good story-telling example.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This story, I should premise,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, mollifying certain
- rawnesses of his throat with a final glass of the Red Nosed Gentleman&rsquo;s
- burgundy, &ldquo;belongs to no experience of my own. I shall tell it as it was
- given me. It speaks broadly of the west and of the folk of cows and the
- Indians, and was set uppermost in my memory by the presence of our western
- friends.&rdquo; Here the Jolly Doctor indicated the Old Cattleman and that
- product of the French fur trader and his Indian wife, Sioux Sam, by a
- polite wave of his glass. Then tossing off the last of his burgundy he,
- without tedious preliminary, struck into his little history.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0002" id="link2HCH0002"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER II.&mdash;THE WINNING OF SAUCY PAOLI.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">G</span>ray Wolf sits
- within the shadow of the agency cottonwood and puffs unhappy kinnikinic
- from his red stone pipe. Heavy, dull and hot lies the August afternoon;
- heavy, dull and hot lies the heart of Gray Wolf. There is a profound grief
- at his soul&rsquo;s roots. The Indian&rsquo;s is not a mobile face. In full expression
- it is capable only of apathy or rage. If your Indian would show you mirth
- or woe, he must eke out the dim and half-told story with streaks of paint.
- But so deep is the present sorrow of Gray Wolf that, even without the aid
- of graphic ochre, one reads some shadow of it in the wrinkled brows and
- brooding eyes.
- </p>
- <p>
- What is this to so beat upon our dismal Osage? There is a dab of mud in
- his hair; his blanket is rags, and his moccasins are rusty and worn. These
- be weeds of mourning. Death has crept to the tepee of Gray Wolf and taken
- a prey. It was Catbird, the squaw of Gray Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- However, his to-day&rsquo;s sadness is not for the departed Catbird. He married
- her without laughter, and saw her pass without tears, as became a man and
- an Osage. When her breath was gone, the women combed her hair and dressed
- her in new, gay clothes, and burned the sacred cedar. Gray Wolf, after the
- usage of his fathers, seated her&mdash;knees to chin&mdash;on yonder
- hilltop, wrapped her in rawhides, and, as against the curiosity of coyotes
- and other prowling vermin of the night, budded her solidly about and over
- with heavy stones. You may see the rude mausole, like some tumbledown
- chimney, from the agency door. That was a moon ago. Another will go by;
- Gray Wolf will lay off his rags and tatters, comb the clay from his hair,
- and give a dance to show that he mourns no more. No, it is not the lost
- Catbird&mdash;good squaw though she was&mdash;that embitters the tobacco
- and haunts the moods of Gray Wolf. It is something more awful than death&mdash;that
- merest savage commonplace; something to touch the important fiber of
- pride.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gray Wolf is proud, as indeed he has concern to be. Not alone is he
- eminent as an Osage; he is likewise an eminent Indian. Those two thin
- ragged lines of blue tattoo which, on each side from the point of the jaw,
- run downward on the neck until they disappear beneath his blanket, prove
- Gray Wolf&rsquo;s elevation. They are the marks of an aboriginal nobility
- whereof the paleface in his ignorance knows nothing. Thirty Indians in all
- the tribes may wear these marks. And yet, despite such signs of respect,
- Gray Wolf has become the subject of acrid tribal criticism; and he feels
- it like the edge of a knife.
- </p>
- <p>
- Keats was quill-pricked to death by critics. But Keats was an Englishman
- and a poet. Petronius Arbiter, Nero&rsquo;s minion, was also criticised; despite
- the faultfinder, however, he lived in cloudless merry luxury, and died
- laughing. But Petronius was a Roman and an epicure. Gray Wolf is to gain
- nothing by these examples. He would not die like the verse maker, he could
- not laugh like the consul; there is a gulf between Gray Wolf and these as
- wide as the width of the possible. Gray Wolf is a stoic, and therefore
- neither so callous nor so wise as an epicure. Moreover, he is a savage and
- not a poet. Petronius came to be nothing better than an appetite; Gray
- Wolf rises to the heights of an emotion. Keats was a radical of
- sensibility, ransacking a firmament; Gray Wolf is an earthgoing
- conservative&mdash;a more stupendous Tory than any Bolingbroke. Of the
- two, while resembling neither, Gray Wolf comes nearer the poet than the
- Sybarite, since he can feel.
- </p>
- <p>
- Let it be remarked that Osage criticism is no trivial thing. It is so far
- peculiar that never a word or look, or even a detractory shrug is made to
- be its evidence. Your Osage tells no evil tales of you to his neighbor.
- His conduct goes guiltless of slanderous syllable or gesture. But he
- criticises you in his heart; he is strenuous to think ill of you; and by
- some fashion of telepathy you know and feel and burn with this tacit
- condemnation as much as ever you might from hot irons laid on your
- forehead. It is this criticism, as silent as it is general, that gnaws at
- Gray Wolf&rsquo;s heart and makes his somber visage more somber yet.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the week before when Gray Wolf, puffed of a vain conceit, matched
- Sundown, his pinto pony&mdash;swift as a winter wind, he deemed her&mdash;against
- a piebald, leggy roan, the property of Dull Ox, the cunning Ponca. The
- race had wide advertisement; it took shape between the Osages and the
- Poncas as an international event. Gray Wolf assured his tribe of victory;
- his Sundown was a shooting star, the roan a turtle; whereupon the Osages,
- ever ready as natural patriots to believe the worst Osage thing to be
- better than the best thing Ponca, fatuously wagered their substance on
- Sundown, even unto the beads on their moccasins.
- </p>
- <p>
- The race was run; the ubiquitous roan, fleeter than a shadow, went by poor
- Sundown as though she ran with hobbles on. Dull Ox won; the Poncas won.
- The believing Osages were stripped of their last blanket; and even as Gray
- Wolf sits beneath the agency cottonwood and writhes while he considers
- what his pillaged countrymen must think of him, the exultant Poncas are in
- the midst of a protracted spree, something in the nature of a scalp dance,
- meant to celebrate their triumph and emphasize the thoroughness wherewith
- the Osages were routed. Is it marvel, then, that Osage thought is full of
- resentment, or that Gray Wolf feels its sting?
- </p>
- <p>
- Over across from the moody Gray Wolf, Bill Henry lounges in the wide
- doorway of Florer&rsquo;s agency store. Bill Henry is young, about twenty-three,
- in truth. He has a quick, handsome face, with gray eyes that dance and
- gleam, and promise explosiveness of temper. The tan that darkens Bill
- Henry&rsquo;s skin wherever the sun may get to it, and which is comparable to
- the color of a saddle or a law book, testifies that the vivacious Bill is
- no recent importation. Five full years on the plains would be needed to
- ripen one to that durable hue.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill gazes out upon Gray Wolf as the latter sticks to the cottonwood&rsquo;s
- shade; a plan is running in the thoughts of Bill. There is call for change
- in Bill&rsquo;s destinies, and he must have the Gray Wolf&rsquo;s consent to what he
- bears in mind.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill has followed cattle since he turned his back on Maryland, a quintet
- of years before, and pushed westward two thousand miles to commence a
- career. Bill&rsquo;s family is of that aristocracy which adorns the &ldquo;Eastern
- Shore&rdquo; of Lord Baltimore&rsquo;s old domain. His folk are of consequence, and
- intended that Bill should take a high position. Bill&rsquo;s mother, an ardent
- church woman, had a pulpit in her thoughts for Bill; his father, more of
- the world, urged on his son the law. But Bill&rsquo;s bent was towards the laws
- neither of heaven nor of men. The romantic overgrew the practical in his
- nature. He leaned not to labor, whether mental or physical, and he liked
- danger and change and careless savageries.
- </p>
- <p>
- Civilization is artificial; it is a creature of convention, of clocks, of
- hours, of an unending procession of sleep, victuals and work. Bill
- distasted such orderly matters and felt instinctive abhorrence therefor.
- The day in and day out effort called for to remain civilized terrified
- Bill; his soul gave up the task before it was begun.
- </p>
- <p>
- But savagery? Ah, that was different! Savagery was natural, easy and
- comfortable to the very heart&rsquo;s blood of Bill, shiftless and wild as it
- ran. Bill was an instance of what wise folk term &ldquo;reversion to type,&rdquo; and
- thus it befell, while his father tugged one way and his mother another,
- Bill himself went suddenly from under their hands, fled from both altar
- and forum, and never paused until he found himself within the generous
- reaches of the Texas Panhandle. There, as related, and because savagery
- cannot mean entire idleness, Bill gave himself to a pursuit of cows, and
- soon had moderate fame as a rider, a roper, a gambler, and a quick, sure
- hand with a gun, and for whatever was deemed excellent in those regions
- wherein he abode.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill&rsquo;s presence among the Osages is the upcome of a dispute which fell
- forth between Bill and a comrade in a barroom of Mobeetie. Bill and the
- comrade aforesaid played at a device called &ldquo;draw poker;&rdquo; and Bill, in
- attempting to supply the deficiencies of a four flush with his six
- shooter, managed the other&rsquo;s serious wounding. This so shook Bill&rsquo;s
- standing in the Panhandle, so marked him to the common eye as a boy of
- dangerous petulance, that Bill sagely withdrew between two days; and now,
- three hundred miles to the north and east, he seeks among the Indians for
- newer pastures more serene.
- </p>
- <p>
- When we meet him Bill has been with the Osages the space of six weeks. And
- already he begins to doubt his welcome. Not that the Osages object. Your
- Indian objects to nothing that does not find shape as an immediate
- personal invasion of himself. But the government agent&mdash;a stern,
- decisive person&mdash;likes not the presence of straggling whites among
- his copper charges; already has he made intimation to Bill that his Osage
- sojourn should be short. Any moment this autocrat may despatch his marshal
- to march Bill off the reservation.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill does not enjoy the outlook. Within the brief frontiers of those six
- weeks of his visit, Bill has contracted an eager fondness for Osage life.
- Your Indian is so far scriptural that he taketh scant heed of the morrow,
- and believeth with all his soul that sufficient unto the day is the evil
- thereof. Here was a program to dovetail with those natural moods of Bill.
- His very being, when once it understood, arose on tiptoe to embrace it.
- Bill has become an Osage in his breast; as he poses with listless grace in
- Florer&rsquo;s portals, he is considering means whereby he may manage a jointure
- with the tribe, and become in actual truth a member.
- </p>
- <p>
- There is but one door to his coming; Bill must wed his way into Osage
- citizenship. He must take a daughter of the tribe to wife; turn &ldquo;squaw
- man,&rdquo; as it is called. Then will Bill be a fullblown Osage; then may no
- agent molest him or make him afraid.
- </p>
- <p>
- This amiable plot, as he lounges in Florer&rsquo;s door, is already decided upon
- by Bill. His fancy has even pitched upon the damsel whom he will honor
- with the title of &ldquo;Mrs. Bill.&rdquo; It is this selection that produces Gray
- Wolf as a factor in Bill&rsquo;s intended happiness, since Gray Wolf is the
- parent of the Saucy Paoli, to whom Bill&rsquo;s hopes are turned. Bill must meet
- and treat with Gray Wolf for his daughter, discover her &ldquo;price,&rdquo; and pay
- it.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0004" id="linkimage-0004"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0027.jpg" alt="0027 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0027.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- As to the lady herself and her generous consent when once her father is
- won, Bill harbors no misgivings. He believes too well of his handsome
- person; moreover, has he not demonstrated in friendly bout, on foot and on
- horseback, his superiority to the young Osage bucks who would pit
- themselves against him? Has he not out-run, out-wrestled and out-ridden
- them? And at work with either rifle, six-shooter or knife, has he not
- opened their eyes? Also, he has conquered them at cards; and their money
- and their ponies and their gewgaws to a healthful value are his as spoils
- thereof.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill is all things that a lady of sensibility should love; and for that on
- those two or three occasions when he came unexpectedly upon her, the Saucy
- Paoli dodged within the ancestral lodge to daub her nose and cheeks with
- hurried yet graceful red, thereby to improve and give her beauties point,
- Bill knows he has touched her heart. Yes, forsooth! Bill feels sure of the
- Saucy Paoli; it is Gray Wolf, somber of his late defeat by the wily Dull
- Ox and the evanescent roan, toward whom his apprehensions turn their face.
- The more, perhaps, since Bill himself, not being a blinded Osage, and
- having besides some certain wit concerning horses, scrupled not to wager
- and win on the Ponca entry, and against the beloved Sundown of his
- father-in-law to come. It is the notion that Gray Wolf might resent this
- apostasy that breeds a half pause in Bill&rsquo;s optimism as he loafs in
- Florer&rsquo;s door.
- </p>
- <p>
- As Bill stands thus musing, the Saucy Paoli goes by. The Saucy Paoli is
- light, pretty, round and wholesome, and she glances with shy, engaging
- softness on Bill from eyes as dark and big and deep as a deer&rsquo;s. Is it not
- worth while to wed her? The Osages are owners in fee of one million, five
- hundred thousand acres of best land; they have eight even millions of
- dollars stored in the Great Father&rsquo;s strong chests in Washington; they are
- paid each one hundred and forty dollars by their fostering Great Father as
- an annual present; and the head of the house draws all for himself and his
- own. Marriage will mean an instant yearly income of two hundred and eighty
- dollars; moreover, there may come the profitable papoose, and with each
- such a money augmentation of one hundred and forty dollars. And again,
- there are but sixteen hundred Osages told and counted; and so would Bill
- gain a strong per cent, in the tribal domain and the tribal treasure.
- Altogether, a union with the fair, brown Saucy Paoli is a prospect fraught
- of sunshine; and so Bill wisely deems it.
- </p>
- <p>
- For an hour it has leaped in Bill&rsquo;s thoughts as an impulse to go across to
- the spreading cottonwood, propose himself to the Gray Wolf for the Saucy
- Paoli, and elicit reply. It would not be the Osage way, but Bill is not
- yet an Osage, and some reasonable allowance should be made by Gray Wolf
- for the rudeness of a paleface education. Such step would earn an answer,
- certain and complete. Your savage beateth not about the bush. His
- diplomacy is Bismarckian; it is direct and proceeds by straight lines.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus chase Bill&rsquo;s cogitations when the sudden sight of the Saucy Paoli and
- her glances, full of wist and warmth, fasten his gallant fancy and
- crystalize a resolution to act at once.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How!&rdquo; observes Bill, by way of salutation, as he stands before Gray Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- That warrior grunts swinish, though polite, response. Then Bill goes
- directly to the core of his employ; he explains his passion, sets forth
- his hopes, and by dashing swoops arrives at the point which, according to
- Bill&rsquo;s blunt theories, should quicken the interest of Gray Wolf, and says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now, what price? How many ponies?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How many you give?&rdquo; retorts the cautious Gray Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Fifteen.&rdquo; Bill stands ready to go to thirty.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Ugh!&rdquo; observes Gray Wolf, and then he looks out across the prairie
- grasses where the thick smoke shows the summer fires to be burning them
- far away.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thirty ponies,&rdquo; says Bill after a pause.
- </p>
- <p>
- These or their money equivalent&mdash;six hundred dollars&mdash;Bill knows
- to be a fat figure. He believes Gray Wolf will yield.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Bill is in partial error. Gray Wolf is not in any sordid, money frame.
- Your savage is a sentimentalist solely on two matters: those to touch his
- pride and those to wake his patriotism. And because of the recent triumph
- of the Poncas, and the consequent censures upon him now flaming, though
- hidden, in the common Osage heart, Gray Wolf&rsquo;s pride is raw and throbbing.
- He looks up at Bill where he waits.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;One pony!&rdquo; says Gray Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;One?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But it must beat the Ponca&rsquo;s roan.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Four hundred miles to the westward lie the broad ranges of the
- Triangle-Dot. Throughout all cow-land the ponies of the Triangle-Dot have
- name for speed. As far eastward as the Panhandle and westward to the
- Needles, as far southward as Seven Rivers and northward to the Spanish
- Peaks, has their fame been flung. About camp fires and among the boys of
- cows are tales told of Triangle-Dot ponies that overtake coyotes and
- jack-rabbits. More, they are exalted as having on a time raced even with
- an antelope. These ponies are children of a blue-grass sire, as
- thoroughbred as ever came out of Kentucky. Little in size, yet a ghost to
- go; his name was Redemption. These speedy mustang babies of Redemption
- have yet to meet their master in the whole southwest. And Bill knows of
- them; he has seen them run.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;In two moons, my father,&rdquo; says Bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- There is much creaking of saddle leathers; there is finally a deep dig in
- the flanks by the long spurs, and Bill, mounted on his best, rides out of
- Pauhauska. His blankets are strapped behind, his war bags bulge with
- provand, he is fully armed; of a verity, Bill meditates a journey. Four
- hundred miles&mdash;and return&mdash;no less, to the ranges of the
- Triangle-Dot.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gray Wolf watches from beneath the cottonwood that already begins to throw
- its shadows long; his eyes follow Bill until the latter&rsquo;s broad brimmed,
- gray sombrero disappears on the hill-crests over beyond Bird River.
- </p>
- <p>
- It skills not to follow Bill in this pilgrimage. He fords rivers; he sups
- and sleeps at casual camps; now and again he pauses for the night at some
- chance plaza of the Mexicans; but first and last he pushes ever on and on
- at a round road gait, and with the end he has success.
- </p>
- <p>
- Within his time by full three weeks Bill is again at the agency of the
- Osages; and with him comes a pony, lean of muzzle, mild of eye, wide of
- forehead, deep of lung, silken of mane, slim of limb, a daughter of the
- great Redemption; and so true and beautiful is she in each line she seems
- rather for air than earth. And she is named the Spirit.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gray Wolf goes over the Spirit with eye and palm. He feels her velvet
- coat; picks up one by one her small hoofs, polished and hard as agate.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Spirit has private trial with Sundown and leaves that hopeless cayuse
- as if the latter were pegged to the prairie.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Ugh!&rdquo; says Gray Wolf, at the finish. &ldquo;Heap good pony!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Your savage is not a personage of stopwatches, weights and records. At the
- best, he may only guess concerning a pony&rsquo;s performance. Also his vanity
- has wings, though his pony has none, and once he gets it into his savage
- head that his pony can race, it is never long ere he regards him as
- invincible. Thus is it with Dull Ox and his precious roan. That besotted
- Ponca promptly accepts the Gray Wolf challenge for a second contest.
- </p>
- <p>
- The day arrives. The race is to be run on the Osage course&mdash;a quarter
- of a mile, straight-away&mdash;at the Pauhauska agency. Two thousand
- Osages and Poncas are gathered together. There is no laughter, no uproar,
- no loud talk; all is gravity, dignity and decorum. The stakes are one
- thousand dollars a side, for Gray Wolf and Dull Ox are opulent pagans.
- </p>
- <p>
- The ponies are brought up and looked over. The fires of a thousand racing
- ancestors burn in the eyes of the Spirit; the Poncas should take warning.
- But they do not; wagers run higher. The Osages have by resolution of their
- fifteen legislators brought the public money to the field. Thus they are
- rich for speculation, where, otherwise, by virtue of former losses, they
- would be helpless with empty hands.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bet after bet is made. The pool box is a red blanket spread on the grass.
- It is presided over by a buck, impecunious but of fine integrity.
- </p>
- <p>
- Being moneyless, he will make no bet himself; being honest, he will
- faithfully guard the treasure put within his care. A sporting buck
- approaches the blanket; he grumbles a word or two in the ear of the pool
- master who sits at the blanket&rsquo;s head; then he searches forth a
- hundred-dollar bill from the darker recesses of his blanket and lays it on
- the red betting-cloth. Another comes up; the pool master murmurs the name
- of the pony on which the hundred is offered; it is covered by the second
- speculator; that wager is complete. Others arrive at the betting blanket;
- its entire surface becomes dotted with bank notes&mdash;two and two they
- lie together, each wagered against the other. The blanket is covered and
- concealed with the money piled upon it. One begins to wonder how a winner
- is to know his wealth. There will be no clash, no dispute. Savages never
- cheat; and each will know his own. Besides, there is the poverty-eaten,
- honest buck, watching all, to be appealed to should an accidental
- confusion of wagers occur.
- </p>
- <p>
- On a bright blanket, a trifle to one side&mdash;not to be under the
- moccasins of commerce, as it were&mdash;sits the Saucy Paoli. She is
- without motion; and a blanket, covering her from little head to little
- foot, leaves not so much as a stray lock or the tip of an ear for one&rsquo;s
- gaze to rest upon. The Saucy Paoli is present dutifully to answer the
- outcome of the Gray Wolf&rsquo;s pact with Bill. One wonders how does her heart
- beat, and how roam her hopes? Is she for the roan, or is she for the Glory
- of the Triangle-Dot?
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0005" id="linkimage-0005"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0041.jpg" alt="0041 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0041.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- The solemn judges draw their blankets about them and settle to their
- places. Three Poncas and three Osages on a side they are; they seat
- themselves opposite each other with twenty feet between. A line is drawn
- from trio to trio; that will serve as wire. The pony to cross first will
- be victor.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now all is ready! The rival ponies are at the head of the course; it will
- be a standing start. A grave buck sits in the saddle near the two racers
- and to their rear. He is the starter. Suddenly he cracks off a Winchester,
- skyward. It is the signal.
- </p>
- <p>
- The ponies leap like panthers at the sound. There is a swooping rush; for
- one hundred yards they run together, then the Spirit takes the lead.
- Swifter than the thrown lance, swift as the sped arrow she comes! With
- each instant she leaves and still further leaves the roan! What has such
- as the mongrel pony of the Poncas to do with the Flower of the
- Triangle-Dot? The Spirit flashes between the double triumvirate of judges,
- winner by fifty yards!
- </p>
- <p>
- And now one expects a shout. There is none. The losing Poncas and the
- triumphant Osages alike are stolid and dignified. Only Gray Wolf&rsquo;s eyes
- gleam, and the cords in his neck swell. He has been redeemed with his
- people; his honor has been returned; his pride can again hold up its head.
- But while his heart may bound, his face must be like iron. Such is the
- etiquette of savagery.
- </p>
- <p>
- Both Gray Wolf and the Osages will exult later, noisily, vociferously.
- There will be feasting and dancing. Now they must be grave and guarded,
- both for their own credit and to save their Ponca adversaries from a
- wound.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill turns and rides slowly back to the judges. The Spirit, daughter of
- Redemption, stands with fire eyes and tiger lily nostrils. Bill swings
- from the saddle. Gray Wolf throws off the blanket from the Saucy Paoli,
- where she waits, head bowed and silent. Her dress is the climax of Osage
- magnificence; the Saucy Paoli glows like a ruby against the dusk green of
- the prairie. Bill takes the Saucy Paoli&rsquo;s hand and raises her to her feet.
- </p>
- <p>
- She lifts her head. Her glance is shy, yet warm and glad. She hesitates.
- Then, as one who takes courage&mdash;just as might a white girl, though
- with less of art&mdash;she puts up her lips to be kissed.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now that is what I call a fair story,&rdquo; commented the Red Nosed Gentleman
- approvingly when the Jolly Doctor came to a pause; &ldquo;only I don&rsquo;t like that
- notion of a white man marrying an Indian. It&rsquo;s apt to keep alive in the
- children the worst characteristics of both races and none of the virtues
- of either.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now I don&rsquo;t know that,&rdquo; observed the Sour Gentleman, contentiously. &ldquo;In
- my own state of Virginia many of our best people are proud to trace their
- blood to Pocahontas, who was sold for a copper kettle. I, myself, am
- supposed to have a spoonful of the blood of that daughter of Powhatan in
- my veins; and while it is unpleasant to recall one&rsquo;s ancestress as having
- gone from hand to hand as the subject of barter and sale&mdash;and for no
- mighty price at that&mdash;I cannot say I would wish it otherwise. My
- Indian blood fits me very well. Did you say&rdquo;&mdash;turning to the Jolly
- Doctor&mdash;&ldquo;did you say, sir, you knew this young man who won the Saucy
- Paoli?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;No,&rdquo; returned the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;I am guiltless of acquaintance with him.
- The story came to me from one of our Indian agents.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- While this talk went forward, Sioux Sam, who understood English perfectly
- and talked it very well, albeit with a guttural Indian effect, and who had
- listened to the Jolly Doctor&rsquo;s story with every mark of interest, was
- saying something in a whisper to the Old Cattleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He tells me,&rdquo; remarked the Old Cattleman in reply to my look of
- curiosity, &ldquo;that if you-alls don&rsquo;t mind, he&rsquo;ll onfold on you a Injun tale
- himse&rsquo;f. It&rsquo;s one of these yere folk-lore stories, I suppose, as Doc Peets
- used to call &rsquo;em.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The whole company made haste to assure Sioux Sam that his proposal was
- deeply the popular one; thus cheered, our dark-skinned raconteur, first
- lighting his pipe with a coal from the great fireplace, issued forth upon
- his verbal journey.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; this,&rdquo; said Sioux Sam, lifting a dark finger to invoke attention and
- puffing a cloud the while, &ldquo;an&rsquo; this tale, which shows how Forked Tongue,
- the bad medicine man, was burned, must teach how never to let the heart
- fill up with hate like a pond with the rains, nor permit the tongue to go
- a crooked trail.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0003" id="link2HCH0003"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER III.&mdash;HOW FORKED TONGUE WAS BURNED.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>he time is long,
- long ago. Ugly Elk is the great chief of the Sioux, an&rsquo; he&rsquo;s so ugly an&rsquo;
- his face so hideous, he makes a great laugh wherever he goes. But the
- people are careful to laugh when the Ugly Elk&rsquo;s back is toward them. If
- they went in front of him an&rsquo; laugh, he&rsquo;d go among them with his stone
- war-axe; for Ugly Elk is sensitive about his looks.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ugly Elk is the warchief of the Sioux an&rsquo; keeps his camp on the high
- bluffs that mark the southern border of the Sioux country where he can
- look out far on the plains an&rsquo; see if the Pawnees go into the Sioux hills
- to hunt. Should the Pawnees try this, then Ugly Elk calls up his young men
- an&rsquo; pounces on the Pawnees like a coyote on a sage hen, an&rsquo; when Ugly Elk
- gets through, the Pawnees are hard to find.
- </p>
- <p>
- It turns so, however, that the Pawnees grow tired. Ugly Elk&rsquo;s war yell
- makes their knees weak, an&rsquo; when they see the smoke of his fire they turn
- an&rsquo; run. Then Ugly Elk has peace in his tepees on the bluffs, an&rsquo; eats an&rsquo;
- smokes an&rsquo; counts his scalps an&rsquo; no Pawnee comes to anger him. An&rsquo; the
- Sioux look up to him as a mighty fighter, an&rsquo; what Ugly Elk says goes as
- law from east to west an&rsquo; no&rsquo;th to south throughout the country of the
- Sioux.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ugly Elk has no sons or daughters an&rsquo; all his squaws are old an&rsquo; dead an&rsquo;
- asleep forever in their rawhides, high on pole scaffolds where the wolves
- can&rsquo;t come. An&rsquo; because Ugly Elk is lonesome an&rsquo; would hear good words
- about his lodge an&rsquo; feel that truth is near, he asks his nephew, Running
- Water, to live with him when now the years grow deep an&rsquo; deeper on his
- head. The nephew is named Running Water because there is no muddiness of
- lies about him, an&rsquo; his life runs clear an&rsquo; swift an&rsquo; good. Some day
- Running Water will be chief, an&rsquo; then they will call him Kill-Bear,
- because he once sat down an&rsquo; waited until a grizzly came up; an&rsquo; when he
- had come up, Running Water offered him the muzzle of his gun to bite; an&rsquo;
- then as the grizzly took it between his jaws, Running Water blew off his
- head. An&rsquo; for that he was called Kill-Bear, an&rsquo; made chief. But that is
- not for a long time, an&rsquo; comes after Ugly Elk has died an&rsquo; been given a
- scaffold of poles with his squaws.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ugly Elk has his heart full of love for Running Water an&rsquo; wants him ever
- in his sight an&rsquo; to hear his voice. Also, he declares to the Sioux that
- they must make Running Water their chief when he is gone. The Sioux say
- that if he will fight the Pawnees, like Ugly Elk, until the smoke of his
- camp is the smoke of fear to the Pawnees, he shall be their chief. An&rsquo;
- because Running Water is as bold as he is true, Ugly Elk accepts the
- promise of the Sioux an&rsquo; rests content that all will be as he asks when
- his eyes close for the long sleep.
- </p>
- <p>
- But while Ugly Elk an&rsquo; Running Water are happy for each other, there is
- one whose heart turns black as he looks upon them. It is Forked Tongue,
- the medicine man; he is the cousin of Ugly Elk, an&rsquo; full of lies an&rsquo;
- treachery. Also, he wants to be chief when that day comes for Ugly Elk to
- die an&rsquo; go away. Forked Tongue feels hate for Running Water, an&rsquo; he plans
- to kill him.
- </p>
- <p>
- Forked Tongue talks with Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, an&rsquo; who has once helped
- Forked Tongue with his medicine. Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is very wise;
- also he wants revenge on Forked Tongue, who promised him a bowl of
- molasses an&rsquo; then put a cheat on him.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Forked Tongue powwows with Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear thinks now he will
- have vengeance on Forked Tongue, who was false about the molasses.
- Thereupon, he rests his head on his paw, an&rsquo; makes as if he thinks an&rsquo;
- thinks; an&rsquo; after a long while he tells Forked Tongue what to do.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Follow my word,&rdquo; says Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;an&rsquo; it will bring success.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, doesn&rsquo;t say to whom &ldquo;success&rdquo; will come; nor
- does Forked Tongue notice because liars are ever quickest to believe, an&rsquo;
- there is no one so easy to deceive as a treacherous man. Forked Tongue
- leaves Moh-Kwa an&rsquo; turns to carry out his su&rsquo;gestions.
- </p>
- <p>
- Forked Tongue talks to Ugly Elk when they&rsquo;re alone an&rsquo; touches his
- feelings where they&rsquo;re sore.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The Running Water laughs at you,&rdquo; says Forked Tongue to Ugly Elk. &ldquo;He
- says you are more hideous than a gray gaunt old wolf, an&rsquo; that he must
- hold his head away when you an&rsquo; he are together. If he looked at you, he
- says, you are so ugly he would laugh till he died.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then the Ugly Elk turned to fire with rage.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How will you prove that?&rdquo; says Ugly Elk to Forked Tongue.
- </p>
- <p>
- Forked Tongue is ready, for Moh-Kwa has foreseen the question of Ugly Elk.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You may prove it for yourself,&rdquo; says Forked Tongue. &ldquo;When you an&rsquo; Running
- Water are together, see if he does not turn away his head.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That night it is as Forked Tongue said. Running Water looks up at the top
- of the lodge, or down at the robes on the ground, or he turns his back on
- Ugly Elk; but he never once rests his eyes on Ugly Elk or looks him in the
- face. An&rsquo; the reason is this: Forked Tongue has told Running Water that
- Ugly Elk complained that Running Water&rsquo;s eye was evil; that his medicine
- told him this; an&rsquo; that he asked Forked Tongue to command Running Water
- not to look on him, the Ugly Elk, for ten wakes an&rsquo; ten sleeps, when the
- evil would have gone out of his eye.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; the Ugly Elk,&rdquo; says Forked Tongue, &ldquo;would tell you this himse&rsquo;f, but
- he loves you so much it would make his soul sick, an&rsquo; so he asks me.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Running Water, who is all truth, does not look for lies in any mouth, an&rsquo;
- believes Forked Tongue, an&rsquo; resolves for ten sleeps an&rsquo; ten wakes not to
- rest his eyes on Ugly Elk.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Ugly Elk notices how Running Water will not look on him, he chokes
- with anger, for he remembers he is hideous an&rsquo; believes that Running Water
- laughs as Forked Tongue has told him. An&rsquo; he grows so angry his mind is
- darkened an&rsquo; his heart made as night. He seeks out the Forked Tongue an&rsquo;
- says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Because I am weak with love for him, I cannot kill him with my hands.
- What shall I do, for he must die?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Forked Tongue makes a long think an&rsquo; as if he is hard at work inside
- his head. Then he gives this counsel to Ugly Elk:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Send to your hunters where they are camped by the river. Say to them by
- your runner to seize on him who comes first to them in the morning, an&rsquo;
- tie him to the big peeled pine an&rsquo; burn him to death with wood. When the
- runner is gone, say to Running Water that he must go to the hunters when
- the sun wakes up in the east an&rsquo; ask them if they have killed an&rsquo; cooked
- the deer you sent them. Since he will be the first to come, the hunters
- will lay hands on Running Water an&rsquo; tie him an&rsquo; burn him; an&rsquo; that will
- put an end to his jests an&rsquo; laughter over your ugliness.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Ugly Elk commands the Antelope, his runner, to hurry with word to the
- hunters to burn him to death who shall come first to them in the morning.
- Then he makes this word to Running Water that he must go to the hunters
- when the sun comes up an&rsquo; ask if they have killed an&rsquo; cooked the deer he
- sent them. Ugly Elk scowls like a cloud while he gives his directions to
- Running Water, but the boy does not see since his eyes are on the ground.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the sun comes up, Running Water starts with the word of Ugly Elk to the
- hunters. But Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is before him for his safety. Moh-Kwa
- knows that the way to stop a man is with a woman, so he has brought a
- young squaw of the lower Yellowstone who is so beautiful that her people
- named her the Firelight. Moh-Kwa makes the Firelight pitch camp where the
- trail of Running Water will pass as he goes to the hunters. An&rsquo; the Wise
- Bear tells her what to say; an&rsquo; also to have a turkey roasted, an&rsquo; a pipe
- an&rsquo; a soft blanket ready for Running Water.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Running Water sees the Firelight, she is so beautiful he thinks it is
- a dream. An&rsquo; when she asks him to eat, an&rsquo; fills the redstone pipe an&rsquo;
- spreads a blanket for him, the Running Water goes no further. He smokes
- an&rsquo; rests on the blanket; an&rsquo; because the tobacco is big medicine, Running
- Water falls asleep with his head in the lap of the Firelight.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Forked Tongue knows that Running Water has started for the hunters,
- he waits. Then he thinks:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now the hunters, because I have waited long, have already burned Running
- Water. An&rsquo; I will go an&rsquo; see an&rsquo; bring back one of the shin-bones to show
- Ugly Elk that he will never return.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Forked Tongue travels fast; an&rsquo; as he runs by the lodge of the Firelight,
- while it is a new lodge to him, he does not pause, for the lodge is closed
- so that the light will not trouble Running Water where he lies asleep with
- his head in the lap of the Firelight.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is behind a tree as Forked Tongue trots past, an&rsquo;
- he laughs deep in his hairy bosom; for Moh-Kwa likes revenge, an&rsquo; he
- remembers how he was cheated of his bowl of molasses.
- </p>
- <p>
- Forked Tongue runs by Moh-Kwa like a shadow an&rsquo; never sees him, an&rsquo; cannot
- hear him laugh.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Forked Tongue comes to the hunters, they put their hands on him an&rsquo;
- tie him to the peeled pine tree. As they dance an&rsquo; shout an&rsquo; pile the
- brush an&rsquo; wood about him, Forked Tongue glares with eyes full of fear an&rsquo;
- asks: &ldquo;What is this to mean?&rdquo; The hunters stop dancing an&rsquo; say: &ldquo;It means
- that it is time to sing the death song.&rdquo; With that they bring fire from
- their camp an&rsquo; make a blaze in the twigs an&rsquo; brush about Forked Tongue;
- an&rsquo; the flames leap up as if eager to be at him&mdash;for fire hates a
- liar&mdash;an&rsquo; in a little time Forked Tongue is burned away an&rsquo; only the
- ashes are left an&rsquo; the big bones, which are yet white hot.
- </p>
- <p>
- The sun is sinking when Running Water wakes an&rsquo; he is much dismayed; but
- the Firelight cheers him with her dark eyes, an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa comes from behind
- the tree an&rsquo; gives him good words of wisdom; an&rsquo; when he has once more
- eaten an&rsquo; drunk an&rsquo; smoked, he kisses the Firelight an&rsquo; goes forward to
- the hunters as the Ugly Elk said.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0006" id="linkimage-0006"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0055.jpg" alt="0055 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0055.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; when he comes to them, he asks:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Have you killed an&rsquo; cooked the deer which was sent you by the Ugly Elk?&rdquo;
- An&rsquo; the hunters laugh an&rsquo; say: &ldquo;Yes; he is killed an&rsquo; cooked.&rdquo; Then they
- take him to the peeled pine tree, an&rsquo; tell him of Forked Tongue an&rsquo; his
- fate; an&rsquo; after cooling a great shin-bone in the river, they wrap it in
- bark an&rsquo; grass an&rsquo; say:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Carry that to the Ugly Elk that he may know his deer is killed an&rsquo;
- cooked.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- While he is returning to Ugly Elk much disturbed, Moh-Kwa tells Running
- Water how Forked Tongue made his evil plan; an both Running Water when he
- hears, an&rsquo; Ugly Elk when he hears, can hardly breathe for wonder. An&rsquo; the
- Ugly Elk cannot speak for his great happiness when now that Running Water
- is still alive an&rsquo; has not made a joke of his ugliness nor laughed. Also,
- Ugly Elk gives Moh-Kwa that bowl of molasses of which Forked Tongue would
- cheat him.
- </p>
- <p>
- The same day, Moh-Kwa brings the Firelight to the lodge of Ugly Elk, an&rsquo;
- she an&rsquo; Running Water are wed; an&rsquo; from that time she dwells in the tepee
- of Running Water, even unto the day when he is named Kill-Bear an&rsquo; made
- chief after Ugly Elk is no more.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is ever,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, beaming from one to another to
- observe if we enjoyed Sioux Sam&rsquo;s story with as deep a zest as he did, &ldquo;it
- is ever a wondrous pleasure to meet with these tales of a primitive
- people. They are as simple as the romaunts invented and told by children
- for the amusement of each other, and yet they own something of a plot,
- though it be the shallowest.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Commonly, too, they teach a moral lesson,&rdquo; spoke up the Sour Gentleman,
- &ldquo;albeit from what I know of savage morals they would not seem to have had
- impressive effect upon the authors or their Indian listeners. You should
- know something of our Indians?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Here the Sour Gentleman turned to the Old Cattleman, who was rolling a
- fresh cigar in his mouth as though the taste of tobacco were a delight.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Me, savey Injuns?&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;Which I knows that much about
- Injuns it gets in my way.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What of their morals, then?&rdquo; asked the Sour Gentleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Plumb base. That is, they&rsquo;re plumb base when took from a paleface
- standp&rsquo;int. Lookin&rsquo; at &rsquo;em with the callous eyes of a savage, I
- reckons now they would mighty likely seem bleached a whole lot.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Discussion rambled to and fro for a time, and led to a learned
- disquisition on fables from the Jolly Doctor, they being, he said, the
- original literature of the world. With the end of it, however, there arose
- a request that the Sour Gentleman follow the excellent examples of the
- Jolly Doctor and Sioux Sam.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But I&rsquo;ve no invention,&rdquo; complained the Sour Gentleman. &ldquo;At the best I
- could but give you certain personal experiences of my own; and those, let
- me tell you, are not always to my credit.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now I&rsquo;ll wager,&rdquo; spoke up the Red Nosed Gentleman, &ldquo;now I&rsquo;ll wager a
- bottle of burgundy&mdash;and that reminds me I must send for another,
- since this one by me is empty&mdash;that your experiences are quite as
- glorious as my own; and yet, sir,&rdquo;&mdash;here the Red Nosed Gentleman
- looked hard at the Sour Gentleman as though defying him to the tiltyard&mdash;&ldquo;should
- you favor us, I&rsquo;ll even follow you, and forage in the pages of my own
- heretofore and give you a story myself.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That is a frank offer,&rdquo; chimed in the Jolly Doctor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;There is no fault to be found with the offer,&rdquo; said the Sour Gentleman;
- &ldquo;and yet, I naturally hesitate when those stories of myself, which my
- poverty of imagination would compel me to give you, are not likely to
- grace or lift me in your esteem.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And what now do you suppose should be the illustrative virtues of what
- stories I will offer when I tell you I am a reformed gambler?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- This query was put by the Red Nosed Gentleman. The information thrown out
- would seem to hearten the Sour Gentleman not a little.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Then there will be two black sheep at all events,&rdquo; said the Sour
- Gentleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Gents,&rdquo; observed the Old Cattleman, decisively, &ldquo;if it&rsquo;ll add to the
- gen&rsquo;ral encouragement, I&rsquo;ll say right yere that in Arizona I was allowed
- to be some heinous myse&rsquo;f. If this is to be a competition in iniquity, I
- aims to cut in on the play.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Encouraged,&rdquo; responded the Sour Gentleman, with just the specter of a
- vinegar smile, &ldquo;by the assurance that I am like to prove no more ebon than
- my neighbors, I see nothing for it save to relate of the riches I made and
- lost in queer tobacco. I may add, too, that this particular incident
- carries no serious elements of wrong; it is one of my cleanest pages, and
- displays me as more sinned against than sinning.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0004" id="link2HCH0004"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER IV.&mdash;THAT TOBACCO UPSET.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>hen the war was
- done and the battle flags of that confederacy which had been my sweetheart
- were rolled tight to their staves and laid away in mournful, dusty corners
- to moulder and be forgot, I cut those buttons and gold ends of braid from
- my uniform, which told of me as a once captain of rebels, and turned my
- face towards New York. I was twenty-one at the time; my majority arrived
- on the day when Lee piled his arms and surrendered to Grant at Appomatox.
- A captain at twenty-one? That was not strange, my friends, in a time when
- boys of twenty-two were wearing the wreath of a brigadier. The war was
- fought by boys, not men;&mdash;like every other war. Ah! I won my rank
- fairly, saber in fist; so they all said.
- </p>
- <p>
- Those were great days. I was with O&rsquo;Ferrell. There are one hundred miles
- in the Shenandoah, and backwards and forwards I&rsquo;ve fought on its every
- foot. Towards the last, each day we fought, though both armies could see
- the end. We, for our side, fought with the wrath of despair; the Federals,
- with the glow of triumph in plain sight. Each day we fought; for if we did
- not go riding down the valley hunting Sheridan, the sun was never
- over-high when he rode up the valley hunting us. Those were brave days! We
- fought twice after the war was done. Yes, we knew of Richmond&rsquo;s fall and
- that the end was come. But what then? There was the eager foe; there were
- we, sullen and ripe and hot with hate. Why should we not fight? So it
- befell that I heard those gay last bugles that called down the last grim
- charge; so it came that I, with my comrades, made the last gray line of
- battle for a cause already lost, and fought round the last standards of a
- confederacy already dead. Those were, indeed, good days&mdash;those last
- scenes were filled with the best and bravest of either side.
- </p>
- <p>
- No; I neither regret nor repent the rebellion; nor do I grieve for
- rebellion&rsquo;s failure. All&rsquo;s well that well ends, and that carnage left us
- the better for it. For myself, I came honestly by my sentiments of the
- South. I was born in Virginia, of Virginians. One of my youthful
- recollections is how John Brown struck his blow at Harper&rsquo;s Ferry; how
- Governor Wise called out that company of militia of which I was a member;
- and how, as we stood in the lamp-lighted Richmond streets that night,
- waiting to take the road for Harper&rsquo;s Ferry, an old grotesque farmerish
- figure rushed excitedly into our midst. How we laughed at the belligerent
- agriculturist! No, he was no farmer; he was Wilkes Booth who, with the
- first whisper of the news, had come hot foot from the stage of Ford&rsquo;s
- Theater in his costume of that night to have his part with us. But all
- these be other stories, and I started to tell, not of the war nor of days
- to precede it, but about that small crash in tobacco wherein I had
- disastrous part.
- </p>
- <p>
- When I arrived in New York my hopes were high, as youth&rsquo;s hopes commonly
- are. But, however high my hope, my pocket was light and my prospects
- nothing. Never will I forget how the mere sensation of the great city
- acted on me like a stimulant. The crowd and the breezy rush of things were
- as wine. Then again, to transplant a man means ever a multiplication of
- spirit. It was so with me; the world and the hour and I were all new
- together, and never have I felt more fervor of enterprise than came to me
- those earliest New York days. But still, I must plan and do some practical
- thing, for my dollars, like the hairs of my head, were numbered.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was my seventh New York morning. As I sat in the café of the Astor
- House, my eye was caught by a news paragraph. The Internal Revenue law,
- with its tax of forty cents a pound on tobacco, had gained a construction,
- and the department&rsquo;s reading of the law at once claimed my hungriest
- interest. No tobacco grown prior to the crop of &rsquo;66 was to be
- affected by the tax; that was the decision.
- </p>
- <p>
- Aside from my saber-trade as a cavalryman, tobacco was that thing whereof
- I exhaustively knew. I was a tobacco adept from the hour when the seed
- went into the ground, down to the perfumed moment when the perfect leaf
- exhaled in smoke. Moreover, I was aware of a trade matter in the nature of
- a trade secret, which might be made of richest import.
- </p>
- <p>
- During those five red years of war, throughout the tobacco regions of the
- south, planting and harvesting, though crippled, had still gone forward.
- The fires of battle and the moving lines of troops had only streaked those
- regions; they never wholly covered or consumed them. And wherever peace
- prevailed, the growing of tobacco went on. The harvests had been stored;
- there was no market&mdash;no method of getting the tobacco out. To be
- brief, as I read the internal revenue decision above quoted, on that Astor
- House morning, I knew that scattered up and down Virginia and throughout
- the rest of the kindom of tobacco, the crops of full five years were lying
- housed, mouldy and mildewed, for the most part, and therefore cheap to
- whoever came with money in his hands. For an hour I sat over my coffee and
- made a plan.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was a gentleman, an old college friend of my father. He was rich,
- avoided business and cared only for books. I had made myself known to him
- on the day of my arrival; he had asked me, over a glass of wine, to let
- him hear from me as time and my destinies took unto themselves direction.
- For my tobacco plan I must have money; and I could think of no one save my
- father&rsquo;s friend of the books.
- </p>
- <p>
- When I was shown into the old gentleman&rsquo;s library, I found him deeply held
- with Moore&rsquo;s Life of Byron. As he greeted me, he kept the volume in his
- left hand with finger shut in the page. Evidently he trusted that I would
- not remain long and that he might soon return to his reading.
- </p>
- <p>
- The situation chilled me; I began my story with slight belief that its end
- would be fortunate. I exposed my tobacco knowledge, laid bare my scheme of
- trade, and craved the loan of five thousand dollars on the personal
- security&mdash;not at all commercial&mdash;of an optimist of twenty-one,
- whose only employment had been certain boot-and-saddle efforts to
- overthrow the nation. I say, I had scant hope of obtaining the aid I
- quested. I suffered disappointment. I was dealing with a gentleman who,
- however much he might grudge me a few moments taken from Byron, was
- willing enough to help me with money. In truth, he seemed relieved when he
- had heard me through; and he at once signed a check with a fine flourish,
- and I came from his benevolent presence equipped for those tobacco
- experiments I contemplated.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is not required that I go with filmy detail into a re-count of my
- enterprise. I began safely and quietly; with my profits I extended myself;
- and at the end of eighteen months, I had so pushed affairs that I was on
- the highway to wealth and the firm station of a millionaire.
- </p>
- <p>
- I had personally and through my agents bought up those five entire
- war-crops of tobacco. Most of it was still in Virginia and the south, due
- to my order; much of it had been already brought to New York. By the
- simple process of steaming and vaporizing, I removed each trace of mould
- and mildew, and under my skillful methods that war tobacco emerged upon
- the market almost as sweet and hale as the best of our domestic stock; and
- what was vastly in its favor, its flavor was, if anything, a trifle mild.
- </p>
- <p>
- In that day of leaf tobacco, the commodity was marketed in
- one-hundred-pound bales. My bales were made with ninety-two pounds of war
- tobacco, sweated free of any touch of mildew; and eight pounds of new
- tobacco, the latter on the outside for the sake of color and looks. Thus
- you may glimpse somewhat the advantage I had. Where, at forty cents a
- pound, the others paid on each bale of tobacco a revenue charge of forty
- dollars, I, with only eight pounds of new tobacco, paid but three dollars
- and twenty cents. And I had cornered the exempted tobacco. Is it wonder I
- began to wax rich?
- </p>
- <p>
- Often I look over my account books of those brilliant eighteen months.
- When I read that news item on the Astor House morning I&rsquo;ve indicated, I
- had carefully modeled existence to a supporting basis of ten dollars a
- week. When eighteen months later there came the crash, I was permitting
- unto my dainty self a rate of personal expenditure of over thirty thousand
- dollars a year. I had apartments up-town; I was a member of the best
- clubs; I was each afternoon in the park with my carriage; incidentally I
- was languidly looking about among the Vere de Veres of the old
- Knickerbockers for that lady who, because of her superlative beauty and
- wit and modesty coupled with youth and station, was worthy to be my wife.
- Also, I recall at this period how I was conceitedly content with myself;
- how I gave way to warmest self-regard; pitied others as dullards and
- thriftless blunderers; and privily commended myself as a very Caesar of
- Commerce and the one among millions. Alas! &ldquo;Pride goeth&rdquo;&mdash;you have
- read the rest!
- </p>
- <p>
- It was a bright October afternoon. My cometlike career had subsisted for
- something like a year and a half; and I, the comet, was growing in size
- and brilliancy as time fled by. My tobacco works proper were over towards
- the East River in a brick warehouse I had leased; to these, which were
- under the superintendence of a trusty and expert adherent whom I had
- brought north from Richmond, I seldom repaired. My offices&mdash;five
- rooms, fitted and furnished to the last limit of rosewood and Russia
- leather magnificence&mdash;were down-town.
- </p>
- <p>
- On this particular autumn afternoon, as I went forth to my brougham for a
- roll to my apartments, the accountant placed in my hands a statement which
- I&rsquo;d asked for and which with particular exactitude set forth my business
- standing. I remember it exceeding well. As I trundled up-town that golden
- afternoon, I glanced at those additions and subtractions which told my
- opulent story. Briefly, my liabilities were ninety thousand dollars; and I
- was rich in assets to a money value of three hundred and twelve thousand
- dollars. The ninety thousand was or would be owing on my tobacco contracts
- south, and held those tons on tons of stored, mildewed war tobacco, solid
- to my command. As I read the totals and reviewed the items, I would not
- have paid a penny of premium to insure my future. There it was in black
- and white. I knew what I had done; I knew what I could do. I was master of
- the tobacco situation for the next three years to come. By that time, I
- would have worked up the entire fragrant stock of leaf exempt from the
- tax; also by that time, I would count my personal fortune at a shadow over
- three millions. There was nothing surer beneath the sun. At twenty-six I
- would retire from trade and its troubles; life would lie at my toe like a
- kick-ball, and I would own both the wealth and the supple youth to pursue
- it into every nook and corner of pleasurable experience. Thus ran my smug
- reflections as I rolled northward along Fifth avenue to dress for dinner
- on that bright October day.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the next afternoon, and I had concluded a pleasant lunch in my
- private office when Mike, my personal and favorite henchman, announced a
- visitor. The caller desired to see me on a subject both important and
- urgent.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Show him in!&rdquo; I said.
- </p>
- <p>
- There slouched into the room an awkward-seeming man of middle age; not
- poor, but roughly dressed. No one would have called him a fop; his
- clothes, far astern of the style, fitted vilely; while his head, never
- beautiful, was made uglier with a shock of rudely exuberant hair and a
- stubby beard like pig&rsquo;s bristles. It was an hour when there still remained
- among us, savages who oiled their hair; this creature was one; and I
- remember how the collar of his rusty surtout shone like glass with the
- dripped grease.
- </p>
- <p>
- My ill-favored visitor accepted the chair Mike placed for him and perched
- uneasily on its edge. When we were alone, I brought him and his business
- to instant bay. I was anxious to free myself of his presence. His bear&rsquo;s
- grease and jaded appearance bred a distaste of him.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What is it you want?&rdquo; My tones were brittle and sharp.
- </p>
- <p>
- The uncouth caller leered at me with a fashion of rancid leer&mdash;I
- suppose even a leer may have a flavor. Then he opened with obscure craft&mdash;vaguely,
- foggily. He wanted to purchase half my business. He would take an account
- of stock; give me exact money for one-half its value; besides, he would
- pay me a bonus of fifty thousand dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- If this unkempt barbarian had come squarely forth and told me his whole
- story; if, in short, I had known who he was and whom he came from, there
- would have grown no trouble. I would have gulped and swallowed the pill;
- we would have dealt; I&rsquo;d have had a partner and been worth one and
- one-half million instead of three millions when my fortune was made. But
- he didn&rsquo;t. He shuffled and hinted and leered, and said over and over again
- as he repeated his offer:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You need a partner.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But beyond this he did not go; and of this I could make nothing, and I
- felt nothing save a cumulative resentment that kept growing the larger the
- longer he stayed. I told him I desired none of his partnership. I told him
- this several divers times; and each time with added vigor and a rising
- voice. To the last he persistently and leeringly retorted his offer;
- always concluding, like another Cato, with his eternal Delenda est
- Carthago.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You need a partner!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Even my flatterers have never painted me as patient, and at twenty-three
- my pulse beat swift and hot. And it came to pass that on the heels of an
- acrid ten minutes of my visitor, I brought him bluntly up.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Go!&rdquo; I said. &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve heard all I care to hear. Go; or I&rsquo;ll have you shown
- the door!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was of no avail; the besotted creature held his ground.
- </p>
- <p>
- I touched a bell; the faithful Mike appeared. It took no more than a wave
- of the hand; Mike had studied me and knew my moods. At once he fell upon
- the invader and threw him down stairs with all imaginable spirit.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thereupon I breathed with vast relief, had the windows lifted because of
- bear&rsquo;s grease that tainted the air, and conferred on the valorous Celt a
- reward of two dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- Who was this ill-combed, unctuous, oily, cloudy, would-be partner? He was
- but a messenger; two months before he had resigned a desk in the
- Washington Treasury&mdash;for appearances only&mdash;to come to me and
- make the proffer. After Mike cast him forth, he brushed the dust from his
- knees and returned to Washington and had his treasury desk again. He was a
- mere go-between. The one he stood for and whose plans he sought to
- transact was a high official of revenue. This latter personage, of whose
- plotting identity back in the shadows I became aware only when it was too
- late, noting my tobacco operations and their profits and hawk-hungry for a
- share, had sent me the offer of partnership. I regret, for my sake as well
- as his own, that he did not pitch upon a more sagacious commissioner.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now fell the bolt of destruction. The morning following Mike&rsquo;s turgid
- exploits with my visitor, I was met in the office door by the manager. His
- face was white and his eyes seemed goggled and fixed as if their possessor
- had been planet-struck. I stared at him.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Have you read the news?&rdquo; he gasped.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What news?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Have you not read of the last order?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Over night&mdash;for my visitor, doubtless, wired his discomfiture&mdash;the
- Revenue Department had reversed its decision of two years before. The
- forty cents per pound of internal revenue would from that moment be
- demanded and enforced against every leaf of tobacco then or thereafter to
- become extant; and that, too, whether its planting and its reaping
- occurred inter arma or took place beneath the pinions of wide-spreading
- peace. The revenue office declared that its first ruling, exempting
- tobacco grown during the war, had been taken criminal advantage of; and
- that thereby the nation in its revenue rights had been sorely defeated and
- pillaged by certain able rogues&mdash;meaning me. Therefore, this new rule
- of revenue right and justice.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now the story ends. Under these changed, severe conditions, when I was
- made to meet a tax of forty dollars where I&rsquo;d paid less than a tithe of it
- before, I was helpless. I couldn&rsquo;t, with my inferior tobacco, engage on
- even terms against the new tobacco and succeed. My strength had dwelt in
- my power to undersell. This power was departed away; my locks as a Sampson
- were shorn.
- </p>
- <p>
- But why spin out the hideous story? My market was choked up; a cataract of
- creditors came upon me; my liabilities seemed to swell while my assets
- grew sear and shrunken. Under the shaking jolt of that last new revenue
- decision, my fortunes came tumbling like a castle of cards.
- </p>
- <p>
- After three months, I dragged myself from beneath the ruin of my affairs
- and stood&mdash;rather totteringly&mdash;on my feet again. I was out of
- business. I counted up my treasure and found myself, debtless and
- unthreatened, master of some twenty thousand dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- And what then? Twenty thousand dollars is not so bad. It is not three
- millions; nor even half of three millions; but when all is said, twenty
- thousand is not so bad! I gave up my rich apartments, sold my horses,
- looked no more for a female Vere de Vere with intent her to espouse, and
- turned to smuggling. I had now a personal as well as a regional grudge
- against government. The revenue had cheated me; I would in revenge cheat
- the revenue. I became a smuggler. That, however, is a tale to tell another
- day.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And now,&rdquo; observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, dipping deeply into his
- burgundy, as if for courage, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll even keep my promise. I&rsquo;ll tell a story
- of superstition and omen; also how I turned in my infancy to cards as a
- road to wealth. Cards as a method to arrive by riches is neither splendid
- nor respectable, but I shall make no apologies. I give you the story of
- The Sign of The Three.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0005" id="link2HCH0005"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER V.&mdash;THE SIGN OF THREE.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">S</span>uch confession may
- come grotesquely enough from one of education and substance, yet all the
- day long I&rsquo;ve been thinking on omens and on prophecies. It was my servant
- who brought it about. He, poor wretch! appeared in my chamber this morning
- with brows of terror and eyes of gloom. He had consulted a gypsy
- sorceress, whom the storm drove to cover in this tavern, and crossed the
- palm of her greed with a silver dollar to be told that he would die within
- the year. Information hardly worth the fee, truly! And the worst is, the
- shrinking fool believes the forebode and is already set about mending his
- lean estates for the change. What is still more strange, I, too, regard
- the word of this snow-blown witch&mdash;whoever the hag may be&mdash;and
- can no more eject her prophecies from my head than can the scared victim
- of them.
- </p>
- <p>
- This business of superstition&mdash;a weakness for the supernatural&mdash;belongs
- with our bone and blood. Reason is no shield from its assaults. Look at
- Sir Thomas More; chopped on Tower Hill because he would believe that the
- blessed wafers became of the Savior&rsquo;s actual flesh and blood! And yet, Sir
- Thomas wrote that most thoughtful of works, &ldquo;Utopia,&rdquo; and was cunning
- enough of a hard-headed politics to succeed Wolsey as Chancellor.
- </p>
- <p>
- Doubtless my bent to be superstitious came to me from my father. He was a
- miner; worked and lived on Tom&rsquo;s Run; and being from Wales, and spending
- his days in gloomy caverns of coal, held to those fantastic beliefs of his
- craft in elves and gnomes and brownies and other malignant, small folk of
- Demonland. However, it becomes not me to find fault with my ancestor nor
- speak lightly of his foibles. He was a most excellent parent; and it is
- one of my comforts, and one which neither my money nor my ease could
- bring, that I was ever a good son.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I say, my father was a miner of coal. Each morning while the mines were
- open, lamp in hat, he repaired deep within the tunneled belly of the hill
- across from our cottage and with pick and blast delved the day long. This
- mine was what is called a &ldquo;rail mine,&rdquo; and closed down its work each
- autumn to resume again in the spring. These beginnings and endings of mine
- activities depended on the opening and closing of navigation along the
- Great Lakes. When the lakes were open, the mines were open; when
- November&rsquo;s ice locked up the lakes, it locked up the mines as well, and my
- father and his fellows of the lamp were perforce idle until the warmth of
- returning spring again freed the keels and south breezes refilled the
- sails of commerce. As this gave my father but five to six months work a
- year; and as&mdash;at sixty cents a ton and pay for powder, oil, fuse and
- blacksmithing&mdash;he could make no more than forty dollars a month, we
- were poor enough.
- </p>
- <p>
- Even the scant money he earned we seldom really fingered. The little that
- was not cheated out of my father&rsquo;s hands by the sins of diamond screens
- and untrue weights and other company tricks, was pounced on in advance by
- the harpies of &ldquo;company store&rdquo; and &ldquo;company cottage,&rdquo; and what coins came
- to our touch never soared above the mean dignity of copper. Poor we were!
- a family of groats and farthings! poor as Lamb&rsquo;s &ldquo;obolary Jew!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It is not worth while for what I have in mind to dwell in sad extent on
- the struggles of my father or the aching shifts we made in my childhood to
- feed and clothe the life within our bodies. And yet, in body at least, I
- thrived thereby. I grew up strong and muscular; I boxed, wrestled and ran;
- was proficient as an athlete, and among other feats and for a slight wager&mdash;which
- was not made with my money, I warrant you!&mdash;swam eighteen miles in
- fresh water one Sunday afternoon.
- </p>
- <p>
- While my muscles did well enough, our poverty would have starved my mind
- were it not for the parish priest. The question of books and schools for
- me was far beyond my father&rsquo;s solution; he was eager that I be educated,
- but the emptiness of the family fisc forbade. It was then the good parish
- priest stepped forward and took me in earnest hand. Father Glennon deemed
- himself no little of an athlete, and I now believe that it was my
- supremacy in muscle among the boys of my age that first drew his eyes to
- me. Be that as it may, he took my schooling on himself; and night and day
- while I abode on Tom&rsquo;s Run&mdash;say until my seventeenth year&mdash;I was
- as tightly bound to the priest&rsquo;s books as ever Prometheus to his rock. And
- being a ready lad, I did my preceptor proud.
- </p>
- <p>
- The good priest is dead now; I sought to put a tall stone above him but
- the bishop refused because it was too rich a mark for the dust of an
- humble priest. I had my way in part, however; I bought the plot just
- across the narrow gravel walk from the grave that held my earliest, best
- friend, and there, registering on its smooth white surface my debt to
- Father Glennon, stands the shaft. I carved on it no explanation of the
- fact that it is only near and not over my good priest&rsquo;s bones. Those who
- turn curious touching that matter may wend to the bishop or to the sexton,
- and I now and then hear that they do.
- </p>
- <p>
- No; I did not go into the coal holes. My father forbade it, and I lacked
- the inclination as well. By nature I was a speculator, a gambler if you
- will. I like uncertainties; I would not lend money at five hundred per
- cent., merely because one knows in advance the measure of one&rsquo;s risks and
- profits. I want a chance to win and a chance to lose; for I hold with the
- eminent gamester Charles Fox that while to win offers the finest sensation
- of which the human soul is capable, the next finest comes when you lose.
- Congenitally I was a courtier of Fortune and a follower of the gospel of
- chance. And this inborn mood has carried me through a score of professions
- until, as I tell you this, I have grown rich and richer as a stock
- speculator, and hang over the markets a pure gambler of the tape. I make
- no apology; I simply point to the folk who surround me.
- </p>
- <p>
- My vocation of a gambler&mdash;for what else shall one call a speculator
- of stocks?&mdash;has doubtless fattened my tendencies towards the
- superstitious. I&rsquo;ve witnessed much surely, that should go to their
- strengthening. Let me tell you a story somewhat in line with the present
- current of my thoughts; it may reach some distance to teach you with
- Horatio that there be more things in heaven and earth than are dreamed of
- in our philosophy. After all, it is the cold record of one of a hundred
- score of incidents that encourage my natural belief in the occult.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- There is a gentleman of stocks&mdash;I&rsquo;ve known him twenty years&mdash;and
- he has a weakness for the numeral three. Just how far his worship of that
- sacred number enters into his business life no one may certainly tell; he
- is secretive and cautious and furnishes no evidence on the point that may
- be covered up. Yet this weakness, if one will call it so, crops up in
- sundry fashions. His offices are suite three, in number thirty-three Blank
- street; his telephones are 333 and 3339 respectively; his great
- undertakings are invariably deferred in their commencements until the
- third of the month.
- </p>
- <p>
- His peculiar and particular fetich, however, is a chain of three hundred
- and thirty-three gold beads. It is among the wonders of the street. This
- was made for him and under his direction by Tiffany, and cost one workman
- something over a year of his life in its construction. It is all hand and
- hammer work, this chain; and on each bead is drawn with delicate and
- finished art a gypsy girl&rsquo;s head. Under a microscope this gypsy face is
- perfect and the entire jewel worthy the boast of the Tiffany house as a
- finest piece of goldbeater&rsquo;s work turned out in modern times.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is a listless, warm evening at the Fifth Avenue Hotel. Our believer in
- &ldquo;Three&rdquo; is gathered casually with two of his friends. There is no business
- abroad; those missions which called our gentleman of the gypsy chain
- up-town are all discharged; he is off duty&mdash;unbuckled, as it were, in
- cheerful, light converse over a bottle of wine. Let us name our friend of
- the Three, &ldquo;James of the Beads;&rdquo; while his duo of comrades may be Reed and
- Rand respectively.
- </p>
- <p>
- Such is man&rsquo;s inconsistency that James of the Beads is railing at Reed who
- has told&mdash;with airs of veneration if not of faith&mdash;of a
- &ldquo;system,&rdquo; that day laid bare to him, warranted to discover in excellent
- rich advance, the names of the winning horses in next day&rsquo;s races. James
- of the Beads laughs, while Reed feebly defends his credulity in lending
- the countenance of half belief to the &ldquo;system&rdquo; he describes.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then a sudden impulse takes James of the Beads. His face grows grave while
- his eye shows deepest thought.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To-morrow is the third of the month?&rdquo; observes James of the Beads. Now
- with emphasis: &ldquo;Gentlemen, I&rsquo;ll show you how to select a horse.&rdquo; Then to
- Reed, who holds in his hands the racing list: &ldquo;Look for to-morrow&rsquo;s third
- race!&rdquo; Reed finds it.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What is the third horse?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Roysterer.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Roysterer!&rdquo; repeats James of the Beads. &ldquo;Good! There are nine letters in
- the name; three syllables; three r&rsquo;s!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then James of the Beads seizes with both hands, in a sort of ecstatic
- catch as catch can, on the gypsy chain of magic. He holds a bead between
- the thumb and fore-finger of each hand. Softly he counts the little yellow
- globes between.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thirty-three!&rdquo; ejaculates James of the Beads. Deeper lights begin to
- shine in his eye. One test of the chain, however, is not enough. He must
- make three. A second time he takes a bead between each fore-finger and
- thumb; on this trial the two beads are farther apart. Again he counts,
- feeling each golden bullet with his finger&rsquo;s tip as the tally proceeds.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Sixty-six!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- There arrives a glow on the brow of James of the Beads to keep company
- with the gathering sparkle of his eye. The questioning of the witch-chain
- goes on. Again he seizes the beads; again he tells the number.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Ninety-nine!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The prophecy is made; the story of success is foretold. James of the Beads
- is on fire; he springs to his feet. Rand and Reed regard him in silence,
- curiously. He walks to a window and sharply gazes out on the
- lamp-sprinkled evening.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Twenty-third street! Fifth avenue! Broadway!&rdquo; he mutters. &ldquo;Still three&mdash;always
- three!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Unconsciously James of the Beads seeks the window-shade with his hand. He
- would raise it a trifle; it is low and interrupts the eye as he stands
- gazing into the trio of thoroughfares. The tassel he grasps is old and
- comes off in his fingers. James of the Beads turns his glance on the
- tassel.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That, too, has its meaning,&rdquo; says James of the Beads, &ldquo;if only we might
- read it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The tassel is a common, poor creature of worsted yarns and strands wrapped
- about a clumsy mold of wood. James of the Beads scans it narrowly as it
- lies in his hand. At last he turns it, and the fringe falls away from the
- wooden mold. There is a little &ldquo;3&rdquo; burned upon the wood. James of the
- Beads exhibits this sacred sign to Reed and Rand; the while his excited
- interest deepens. Then he counts the strands of worsted which constitute
- the fringe. There are eighty-one!
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Three times three times three times three!&rdquo; and James of the Beads draws
- a deep breath.
- </p>
- <p>
- Who might resist these spectral manifestations of &ldquo;Three!&rdquo; James of the
- Beads turns from the window like one whose decision is made. Without a
- word he takes a slip of paper from his pocket book and going to the table
- writes his name on its back. It is a pleasant-seeming paper, this slip;
- and pleasantly engraved and written upon. No less is it than a New York
- draft drawn on the City National Bank by a leading Chicago concern for an
- even one hundred thousand dollars. James of the Beads places it in the
- hands of Rand.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To-morrow should be the luckiest of days,&rdquo; says James of the Beads. &ldquo;I
- must not lose it. I must consider to-morrow and arrange to set afoot
- certain projects which I&rsquo;ve had in train for some time. As to the races,
- Rand, take the draft and put it all on Roysterer.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Man alive!&rdquo; remonstrates the amazed Rand; &ldquo;it&rsquo;s too much on one horse!
- Moreover, I won&rsquo;t have time to get all that money down.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Get down what you can then,&rdquo; commands James of the Beads. &ldquo;Plunge! Have
- no fears! I tell you, so surely as the sun comes up, Roysterer will win.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The wise ones don&rsquo;t think so,&rdquo; urges Rand, who is not wedded to the
- mystic &ldquo;Three,&rdquo; and beholds nothing wondrous in that numeral. &ldquo;This
- Roysterer is a seven for one shot.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And the better for us,&rdquo; retorts James of the Beads. &ldquo;Roysterer is to
- win.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But wouldn&rsquo;t it be wiser to split this money and play part of it on
- Roysterer for a place?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Never!&rdquo; declares James of the Beads. &ldquo;Do you suppose I don&rsquo;t know what
- I&rsquo;m about? I&rsquo;m worth a million for each year of my life, and I made every
- stiver of it by the very method I take to discover this horse. Can&rsquo;t you
- see that I&rsquo;m not guessing?&mdash;that I have reason for what I do?
- Roysterer for a place! Never! get down every splinter that Roysterer
- finishes first.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Let me ask one question,&rdquo; observes the cautious Rand. &ldquo;Do you know the
- horse?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Never heard of the animal in my life!&rdquo; remarks James of the Beads,
- pouring himself a complacent glass. This he tastes approvingly. &ldquo;You must
- pardon me, my friends, I&rsquo;ve got to write a note or two. I&rsquo;ve not too much
- time for a man with twenty things to do, and who must be in the street
- when business opens to-morrow. Take my word for it; get all you can on
- Roysterer. If we win, we&rsquo;re partners; if we lose, I&rsquo;m alone.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Rand shakes sage, experienced head, while his face gathers a cynical look.
- </p>
- <p>
- Reed and Rand take James of the Beads by the hand and then withdraw.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What do you make of it?&rdquo; asks Rand.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The man&rsquo;s infatuated!&rdquo; replies Reed.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And yet, you also believe in systems,&rdquo; remarks Rand.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is the next afternoon. The Brighton course is rampant with the usual
- jostling, pushing, striving, guessing, knowing, wagering, winning, losing,
- ignorant, exulting, deploring, profane crowd. The conservative Rand has so
- far obeyed the behest of James of the Beads that he has fifteen thousand
- dollars on Roysterer straight.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To lose fifteen thousand won&rsquo;t hurt him,&rdquo; says Rand, and so consoles
- himself for a mad speculation whereof he has no joy.
- </p>
- <p>
- Reed and Rand, as taking life easily, are in a box; the race over which
- their interest clings and clambers is called.
- </p>
- <p>
- The horses are at the post. Roysterer does not act encouragingly; he is
- too sleepy&mdash;too lethargic! Starlight, the favorite, steps about,
- alert and springy as a cat; it should be an easy race for her if looks go
- for aught.
- </p>
- <p>
- They get the word; they are &ldquo;off!&rdquo; The field sweeps &rsquo;round the
- curve. A tall man in a nearby box follows the race with a glass.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;At the quarter,&rdquo; sings the tall man. &ldquo;Starlight first, Blenheim second,
- Roysterer third!&rdquo; There is a pause. Then the tall man: &ldquo;At the half!
- Starlight first, Blenheim second, Roysterer third!&rdquo; Rand turns to Reed.
- &ldquo;He must better that,&rdquo; says Rand, &ldquo;or he&rsquo;ll explode the superstition of
- our friend.&rdquo; There is a wait of twenty-five seconds. Again the tall,
- binoculared man: &ldquo;Three-quarter post! Starlight first, Blenheim second,
- Roysterer third&mdash;and whipping!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s as good as over,&rdquo; observes Rand. &ldquo;I wonder what James of the Beads
- will say to his witch-chain when he hears the finish.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s surprising,&rdquo; remarks Reed peevishly, &ldquo;that a man of his force and
- clear intelligence should own to such a weakness! All his life he&rsquo;s
- followed this marvelous &lsquo;Three&rsquo; about; and having had vast success he
- attributes it to the &lsquo;Three,&rsquo; when he might as well and as wisely ascribe
- it to Captain Kidd or Trinity church. To-day&rsquo;s results may cure him; and
- that&rsquo;s one comfort.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- There is a sharp click as the tall man in the nearby box shuts up his
- glasses.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Roysterer wins!&rdquo; says the tall man.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Got down fifteen thousand. Won one hundred and five thousand,&rdquo; reads
- James of the Beads from Rand&rsquo;s telegram sent from the track. James of the
- Beads is in his offices; he has just finished a victorious day, at once
- heavy and tumultuous with the buying and the selling of full three hundred
- thousand shares of stocks. &ldquo;They should have wagered the full one hundred
- thousand and let the odds look after themselves,&rdquo; he says. Then James of
- the Beads begins to caress the gypsy chain. &ldquo;You knew,&rdquo; he murmurs; &ldquo;of
- course, you knew!&rdquo; There is a note of devotion in the tones. The
- bead-worship goes on for a silent moment. &ldquo;Only one hundred and five
- thousand!&rdquo; ruminates James of the Beads. &ldquo;I suppose Rand was afraid!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That is indeed a curious story,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor, when the Red
- Nosed Gentleman, being done with James of the Beads, was returning to his
- burgundy; &ldquo;and did it really happen?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Of a verity, did it,&rdquo; returned the Red Nosed Gentleman. &ldquo;I was Rand.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Conversation fluttered from one topic to another for a brief space, but
- dealt mainly with those divers superstitions that folk affect. When signs
- and omens were worn out, the Jolly Doctor turned upon the Old Cattleman as
- though to remind that ancient practitioner of cows how it would be now his
- right to uplift us with a reminiscence.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;No, I don&rsquo;t need to be told it none,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;On the
- principle of freeze-out, it&rsquo;s shore got down to me. Seein&rsquo; how this yere
- snow reminds me a heap of Christmas, I&rsquo;ll onload on you-all how we&rsquo;re
- aroused an&rsquo; brought to a realisin&rsquo; sense of that season of gifts once upon
- a time in Wolfville.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0006" id="link2HCH0006"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER VI.&mdash;THAT WOLFVILLE CHRISTMAS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>his yere can&rsquo;t be
- called a story; which it can&rsquo;t even be described none as a sketch.
- Accordin&rsquo; to the critics, who, bein&rsquo; plumb onable to write one themse&rsquo;fs,
- nacherally knows what a story ought to be, no story&rsquo;s a story onless she&rsquo;s
- built up like one of these one-sided hills. Reelation must climb painfully
- from base to peak, on the slope side, with interest on a up-grade, say, of
- one foot in ten; an&rsquo; then when you-all arrives safely at the summit, the
- same bein&rsquo; the climax, you&rsquo;re to pitch headlong over the precipice on the
- sheer an&rsquo; other side, an&rsquo; in the space of not more&rsquo;n a brace of sentences,
- land, bing! bang! smash!&mdash;all broke up at the bottom. That, by what
- you-all might call &ldquo;Our best literary lights,&rdquo; would be a story, an&rsquo; since
- what I&rsquo;m about to onfold don&rsquo;t own no sech brands nor y&rsquo;ear-marks, it
- can&rsquo;t come onder that head.
- </p>
- <p>
- This partic&rsquo;lar o&rsquo;casion is when little Enright Peets Tutt&mdash;said
- blessed infant, as I sets forth former, bein&rsquo; the conj&rsquo;int production of
- Dave Tutt an&rsquo; his esteemable wife, Tucson Jennie&mdash;is comin&rsquo; eight
- years old next spring round-up. Little Enright Peets is growin&rsquo; strong an&rsquo;
- husky now, an&rsquo; is the pride of the Wolfville heart. He&rsquo;s shed his milk
- teeth an&rsquo; is sproutin&rsquo; a second mouthful, white an&rsquo; clean as a coyote&rsquo;s.
- Also, his cur&rsquo;osity is deeveloped powerful an&rsquo; he&rsquo;s in the habit of
- pervadin&rsquo; about from the Red Light to the New York Store, askin&rsquo;
- questions; an&rsquo; he is as familiar in the local landscape as either the
- Tucson stage or Old Monte, the drunkard who drives it.
- </p>
- <p>
- One afternoon, about first drink time, little Enright Peets comes waddlin&rsquo;
- up to Old Man Enright on them short reedic&rsquo;lous black-b&rsquo;ar laigs of his,
- an&rsquo; says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Say, gran&rsquo;dad Enright, don&rsquo;t you-all cim-marons never have no Christmas
- in this camp? Which if you does, all I got to say is I don&rsquo;t notice no
- Christmas none since I&rsquo;ve been yere, an&rsquo; that&rsquo;s whatever!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0007" id="linkimage-0007"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0091.jpg" alt="0091 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0091.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Will you-all listen to this preecocious child!&rdquo; observes Enright to Doc
- Peets, with whom he&rsquo;s in talk. &ldquo;Wherever now do you reckon, Doc, he hears
- tell of Christmas?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How about it, Uncle Doc?&rdquo; asks little Enright Peets, turnin&rsquo; his eyes up
- to Peets when he notices Enright don&rsquo;t reply.
- </p>
- <p>
- At this Enright an&rsquo; Peets makes a disparin&rsquo; gesture an&rsquo; wheels into the
- Red Light for a drink, leavin&rsquo; pore little Enright Peets standin&rsquo; in the
- street.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That baby puts us to shame, Doc,&rdquo; says Enright, as he signs up to Black
- Jack, the barkeep, for the Valley Tan; &ldquo;he shows us in one word how we
- neglects his eddication. The idee of that child never havin&rsquo; had no
- Christmas! It&rsquo;s more of a stain on this commoonity than not hangin&rsquo; Navajo
- Joe that time.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s whatever!&rdquo; assents Peets, reachin&rsquo; for the nose-paint in his turn.
- &ldquo;&lsquo;Out of the mouths of babes an&rsquo; sucklin&rsquo;s,&rsquo; as the good book says.&rdquo; This
- infantile bluff of little Enright Peets goes a long way to stir up the
- sensibilities of the public. As for Enright, he don&rsquo;t scroople to take
- Dave Tutt to task.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The thought that you, Dave,&rdquo; says Enright, &ldquo;you, a gent I yeretofore
- regyards as distinguished for every paternal virchoo, would go romancin&rsquo;
- along, lettin&rsquo; that boy grow up in darkness of Christmas, an&rsquo; it one of
- the first festivals of the Christian world! As a play, I says freely, that
- sech neglect is plumb too many for me!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;She&rsquo;s shore a shame,&rdquo; adds Dan Boggs, who&rsquo;s also shocked a heap, and
- stands in with Enright to crawl Dave&rsquo;s hump, &ldquo;she&rsquo;s shore a shame, never
- to provide no Christmas for that offspring of yours, an&rsquo; leave him to go
- knockin&rsquo; about in his ignorance like a blind dog in a meat shop. That&rsquo;s
- what I states; she&rsquo;s a shame!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now gents,&rdquo; reemonstrates Dave, &ldquo;don&rsquo;t press the limit in these yere
- reecrim&rsquo;nations, don&rsquo;t crowd me too hard. I asks you, whatever could I do?
- If you-all enthoosiasts will look this yere Christmas proposition ca&rsquo;mly
- in the face, you&rsquo;ll begin to notice that sech cel&rsquo;brations ain&rsquo;t feasible
- in Arizona. Christmas in its very beginnin&rsquo; is based on snow. Who&rsquo;s the
- reg&rsquo;lar round-up boss for Christmas? Ain&rsquo;t he a disrepootable Dutchman
- named Santa Claus? Don&rsquo;t he show up wrapped in furs, an&rsquo; with reindeer an&rsquo;
- sleigh an&rsquo; hock deep in a snowstorm? Answer me that? Also show me where&rsquo;s
- your snow an&rsquo; where&rsquo;s your sleigh an&rsquo; where&rsquo;s your reindeer an&rsquo; where&rsquo;s
- your Dutchman in Wolfville? You-all better go about Jixin&rsquo; up your camp
- an&rsquo; your climate so as to make one of these Christmases possible before
- ever you come buttin&rsquo; in, cavilin&rsquo; an&rsquo; criticisin&rsquo; ag&rsquo;in me as a parent.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which jest the same, Dave,&rdquo; contends Dan, who takes the eepisode mighty
- sour, &ldquo;it looks like you-all could have made some sort o&rsquo; play.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- About this time, as addin&rsquo; itse&rsquo;f to the gen&rsquo;ral jolt given the Wolfville
- nerve by them Christmas questions put aforesaid by little Enright Peets,
- news comes floatin&rsquo; over from Red Dog of a awful spree that low-flung
- outfit enjoys. It&rsquo;s a Six Shooter Weddin&rsquo;; so deenominated because Pete
- Bland, the outlaw for whom the party is made, an&rsquo; his wife, The Duchess,
- has been married six years an&rsquo; ain&rsquo;t done nothin&rsquo; but fight. Wherefore, on
- the sixth anniversary of their nuptials, Red Dog resolves on a Six Shooter
- Weddin&rsquo;; an&rsquo; tharupon descends on those two wedded warriors, Pete an&rsquo; The
- Duchess, in a body, packin&rsquo; fiddles, nose-paint, an&rsquo; the complete regalia
- of a frantic shindig. An&rsquo; you hear me, gents, them Red Dog tarrapins shore
- throws themse&rsquo;fs loose! You-all could hear their happy howls in Wolfville.
- </p>
- <p>
- As a reason for the outburst, an&rsquo; one consistent with its name, the guests
- endows Pete an&rsquo; The Duchess each with belts an&rsquo; a brace of guns.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To the end,&rdquo; says the Red Dog cha&rsquo;rman when he makes the presentation
- speech, &ldquo;that, as between Pete an&rsquo; The Duchess, we as a commoonity
- promotes a even break, and clothes both parties in interest with equal
- powers to preserve the peace.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As I observes, it&rsquo;s the story of these proud doin&rsquo;s on the locoed part of
- our rival, that ondoubted goes some distance to decide us Wolves of
- Wolfville on pullin&rsquo; off a Christmas warjig for little Enright Peets. We
- ain&rsquo;t goin&rsquo; to be outdone none in this business of being fervid.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s mebby a month prior to Christmas when we resolves on this yere
- racket, an&rsquo; so we has ample time to prepare. Almost every afternoon an&rsquo;
- evenin&rsquo; over our Valley Tan, we discusses an&rsquo; does our wisest to evolve a
- programme. It&rsquo;s then we begins to grasp the wisdom of Dave&rsquo;s observations
- touchin&rsquo; how onfeasible it is to go talkin&rsquo; of Christmas in southern
- Arizona.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Nacherally,&rdquo; remarks Enright, as we sits about the Red Light, turnin&rsquo; the
- game in our minds, &ldquo;nacherally, we ups an&rsquo; gives little Enright Peets
- presents. Which brings us within ropin&rsquo; distance of the inquiry, &lsquo;Whatever
- will we give him?&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;We-all can&rsquo;t give him fish-lines, an&rsquo; sech,&rdquo; says Doc Peets, takin&rsquo; up
- Enright&rsquo;s argument, &ldquo;for thar ain&rsquo;t no fish. Skates is likewise barred,
- thar bein&rsquo; no ice; an&rsquo; sleds an&rsquo; mittens an&rsquo; worsted comforters an&rsquo; fur
- caps fails us for causes sim&rsquo;lar. Little Enright Peets is too young to
- smoke; Tucson Jennie won&rsquo;t let him drink licker; thar, with one word, is
- them two important sources closed ag&rsquo;in us. Gents, Pm inclined to string
- my bets with Dave; I offers two for one as we sets yere, that this framin&rsquo;
- up a Christmas play in Arizona as a problem ain&rsquo;t no slouch.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thar&rsquo;s picture books,&rdquo; says Faro Nell.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Shore!&rdquo; assents Cherokee Hall, where he&rsquo;s planted back of his faro box.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; painted blocks!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Good!&rdquo; says Cherokee.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; candy!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Nell&rsquo;s right!&rdquo; an&rsquo; Cherokee coincides plumb through, &ldquo;Books, blocks, an&rsquo;
- candy, is what I calls startin&rsquo; on velvet.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Whatever&rsquo;s the matter,&rdquo; says Dan Boggs, who&rsquo;s been rackin&rsquo; his intellects
- a heap, &ldquo;of givin&rsquo; little Enright Peets a faro layout, or mebby now, a
- roolette wheel? Some of them wheels is mighty gaudy furniture!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Dan,&rdquo; says Enright, an&rsquo; his tones is severe; &ldquo;Dan, be you-all aimin&rsquo; to
- corrupt this child?&rdquo; Dan subsides a whole lot after this yere reproof.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t reckon now,&rdquo; observes Jack Moore, an&rsquo; his manner is as one ropin&rsquo;
- for information; &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t reckon now a nice, wholesome Colt&rsquo;s-44, ivory
- butt, stamped leather belts, an&rsquo; all that, would be a proper thing to put
- in play. Of course, a 8-inch gun is some heavy as a plaything for a infant
- only seven; but he&rsquo;d grow to it, gents, he&rsquo;d grow to it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Don&rsquo;t alloode to sech a thing, Jack,&rdquo; says Dan, with a shudder; &ldquo;don&rsquo;t
- alloode to it. Little Enright Peets would up an&rsquo; blow his yoothful light
- out; an&rsquo; then Tucson Jennie would camp on our trails forevermore as the
- deestroyers of her child. The mere idee gives me the fantods!&rdquo; An&rsquo; Dan,
- who&rsquo;s a nervous party, shudders ag&rsquo;in.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Gents,&rdquo; says Texas Thompson, &ldquo;I ain&rsquo;t cut in on this talk for two
- reasons: one is I ain&rsquo;t had nothin&rsquo; to say; an&rsquo; ag&rsquo;in, it was Christmas
- Day when my Laredo wife&mdash;who I once or twice adverts to as gettin&rsquo; a
- divorce&mdash;ups an&rsquo; quits me for good. For which causes it has been my
- habit to pass up all mention an&rsquo; mem&rsquo;ry of this sacred season in a sperit
- of silent pra&rsquo;r. But time has so far modified my feelin&rsquo;s that,
- considerin&rsquo; the present purposes of the camp, I&rsquo;m willin&rsquo; to be heard.
- Thar&rsquo;s nothin&rsquo; that should be looked to more jealously than this ye re
- givin&rsquo; of presents. It&rsquo;s grown so that as a roole the business of makin&rsquo;
- presents degen&rsquo;rates to this: Some sport who can&rsquo;t afford to, gives some
- sport something he don&rsquo;t need. Thar&rsquo;s no fear of the first, since we gents
- can afford anything we likes. As to the second prop&rsquo;sition, we should skin
- our kyards some sharp. We-all ought to lavish on little Enright Peets a
- present which, while safegyardin&rsquo; his life an&rsquo; his morals, is calc&rsquo;lated
- to teach him some useful accomplishments. Books, blocks, an sweetmeats, as
- proposed by our fac&rsquo;natin&rsquo; townswoman, Miss Faro Nell&rdquo;&mdash;Nell tosses
- Texas a kiss&mdash;&ldquo;is in admir&rsquo;ble p&rsquo;int as coverin&rsquo; a question of
- amooze-ments. For the rest, an&rsquo; as makin&rsquo; for the deevel-opment of what
- will be best in the character of little Enright Peets, I moves you we-all
- turns in an&rsquo; buys that baby the best bronco&mdash;saddle, bridle, rope an&rsquo;
- spurs, complete&mdash;that the southwest affords.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Texas, who&rsquo;s done stood up to make this yere oration, camps down ag&rsquo;in in
- the midst of a storm of applause. The su&rsquo;gestion has immediate adoption.
- </p>
- <p>
- We-all gives a cold thousand for the little boss. We gets him of the sharp
- who&mdash;it bein&rsquo; in the old day before railroads&mdash;is slammin&rsquo;
- through the mails from Chihuahua to El Paso, three hundred miles in three
- nights. This bronco&mdash;he&rsquo;s a deep bay, shadin&rsquo; off into black like one
- of them overripe violins, an&rsquo; with nostrils like red expandin&rsquo; hollyhocks&mdash;can
- go a hundred miles between dark an&rsquo; dark, an&rsquo; do it three days in a week.
- Which lie&rsquo;s shore a wonder, is that little hoss; an&rsquo; the saddle an&rsquo;
- upholstery that goes with him, Spanish leather an&rsquo; gold, is fit for his
- company.
- </p>
- <p>
- As Dan leads him up in front of the Red Light Christmas Eve for us to look
- at, he says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Gents, if he ain&rsquo;t a swallow-bird on four legs, then I never sees no sech
- fowl; an&rsquo; the only drawback is that, considerin&rsquo; the season, we can&rsquo;t hang
- him on no tree.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; y ere, now, is where we-all gets scared up. It spoils the symmetry of
- this story to chunk it in this a-way; but I can&rsquo;t he&rsquo;p myse&rsquo;f, for this
- story, like that tale of James of the Beads, is troo.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jest as we-all is about to prounce down with our gifts on Dave&rsquo;s wickeyup
- like a mink on a settin&rsquo; hen&mdash;Dan bein&rsquo; all framed an&rsquo; frazzled up in
- cow-tails an&rsquo; buffalo horns like a Injun medicine man, thinkin&rsquo; to make
- the deal as Santa Claus&mdash;Tucson Jennie comes surgin&rsquo; up, wild an&rsquo;
- frantic, an&rsquo; allows little Enright Peets is lost. Dave, she says, is
- chargin&rsquo; about, tryin&rsquo; to round him up.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which I knows he&rsquo;s done been chewed up by wolves,&rdquo; says Tucson Jennie,
- wringin&rsquo; her hands an&rsquo; throwin&rsquo; her apron over her head. &ldquo;He&rsquo;d shore
- showed up for supper if he&rsquo;s alive.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s obvious that before that Christmas can proceed, we-all has got to
- recover the beneficiary. Thar&rsquo;s a gen&rsquo;ral saddlin&rsquo; up, an&rsquo; in no time
- Wolf-ville&rsquo;s population is spraddlin&rsquo; about the surroundin&rsquo; scenery.
- </p>
- <p>
- It comes right though, an&rsquo; it&rsquo;s Dan who makes the turn. Dan discovers
- little Enright Peets camped down in the lee of a mesquite bush, seven
- miles out on his way to the Floridas mountains. He puts it up he&rsquo;s goin&rsquo;
- over to the hills to have a big talk an&rsquo; make medicine with Moh-Kwa, the
- wise medicine b&rsquo;ar that Sioux Sam yere has been reelatin&rsquo; to him about.
- </p>
- <p>
- No, that child ain&rsquo;t scared none; he&rsquo;s takin&rsquo; it cool an&rsquo; contented, with
- twenty coyotes settin&rsquo; about, blinkin&rsquo; an&rsquo; silent on their tails, an&rsquo;
- lookin&rsquo; like they&rsquo;re sort o&rsquo; thinkin&rsquo; little Enright Peets over an&rsquo; tryin&rsquo;
- to figger out his system. Them little wolves don&rsquo;t onderstand what brings
- that infant out alone on the plains, that a-way; an&rsquo; they&rsquo;re cogitatin&rsquo;
- about it when Dan disperses &rsquo;em to the four winds.
- </p>
- <p>
- That&rsquo;s all thar is to the yarn. Little Enright Peets is packed into camp
- an&rsquo; planted in the midst of them books an&rsquo; blocks an&rsquo; candies which Faro
- Nell su&rsquo;gests; also, he&rsquo;s made happy with the little hoss. Dan, in his
- medicine mask an&rsquo; paint, does a skelp dance, an&rsquo; is the soul of the hour.
- </p>
- <p>
- Little Enright Peets&rsquo; joy is as wide as the territory. Despite
- reemonstrance, he insists on get-tin&rsquo; into that gold-embossed saddle an&rsquo;
- givin&rsquo; his little hoss a whirl &lsquo;round the camp. Dan rides along to head
- off stampedes.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the return, little Enright Peets comes down the street like an arrow
- an&rsquo; pulls up short. As Dave searches him out of the saddle, he says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Paw, that cayouse could beat four kings an&rsquo; a ace.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That&rsquo;s reward enough; Wolfville is never more pleased than the night it
- opens up to little Enright Peets the beauties which lies hid in Christmas.
- An&rsquo; the feelin&rsquo; that we-all has done this, sort o&rsquo; glorifies an&rsquo; gilds the
- profound deebauch that en-soos. Tucson Jennie lays it down that it&rsquo;s shore
- the star Christmas, since it&rsquo;s the one when her lost is found an&rsquo; the
- Fates in the guise of Dan presents her with her boy ag&rsquo;in. I knows of
- myse&rsquo;f, gents, that Jennie is shore moved, for she omits utter to lay for
- Dave with reproaches when, givin&rsquo; way to a gen&rsquo;rous impulse, he issues
- forth with the rest of the band, an&rsquo; relaxes into a picnic that savors of
- old days.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;My friends,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor, as we were taking our candles
- preparatory for bed, the hour having turned towards the late, &ldquo;I shall
- think on this as an occasion of good company. And to-morrow evening&mdash;for
- this storm will continue to hold us prisoners&mdash;you will find unless
- better offer, I shall recognize my debt to you by attempting a Christmas
- story myself. I cannot stir your interest as has our friend of camps and
- trails with his Wolfville chapter, but I shall do what lies in me.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You will tell us of some Christmas,&rdquo; hazarded the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;that
- came beneath your notice as a professional man.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Oh, no; not that,&rdquo; returned the Jolly Doctor. &ldquo;This is rather a story of
- health and robust strength than any sick-bed tale. It is of gloves and
- fighting men who never saw a doctor. I shall call it &lsquo;The Pitt Street
- Stringency.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was eight of the clock on the second evening when we gathered about the
- fire-place. The snow was still falling and roads were reported blocked
- beyond any thought of passage. We were snowbound; folk who should know
- declared that if a road were broken for our getting out within a week, it
- was the best we might look for.
- </p>
- <p>
- No one seemed stricken of grief at this prison prospect. As we came about
- the cheery blaze, every face was easy and content. The Jolly Doctor joined
- the Red Nosed Gentleman in his burgundy, while the Sour Gentleman and the
- Old Cattleman qualified for the occasion with a copious account of
- whiskey, which the aged man of cows called &ldquo;Nose-paint.&rdquo; Sioux Sam and I
- were the only &ldquo;abstainers&rdquo;&mdash;I had ceased and he had never commenced&mdash;but
- as if to make up, we smoked a double number of cigars.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Jolly Doctor began with the explanation that the incidents he would
- relate had fallen beneath his notice when as a student he walked the New
- York hospitals; then, glass in hand, he told us the tale of The Pitt
- Street Stringency.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0007" id="link2HCH0007"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER VII.&mdash;THE PITT STREET STRINGENCY.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span>nother would-be
- sooicide, eh! Here, Kid,&rdquo; to a sharp gamin who does errands and odd
- commissions for the house; &ldquo;take this mut in where dey kills &rsquo;em.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The speaker is a loud young man, clad in garments of violence. The derby
- tilted over eye, the black cigar jutting ceilingward at an agle of sixty
- degrees, the figured shirt whereof a dominating dye is angry red, the high
- collar and flash tie, with its cheap stone, all declare the Bowery. As if
- to prove the proposition announced of his costume, the young man is
- perched on a stool, the official ticket-seller of a Bowery theatre.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike Menares, whom the Bowery person alludes to as the &ldquo;mut,&rdquo; is a
- square-shouldered boy of eighteen; handsome he is as Apollo, yet with a
- slow, good-humored guilelessness of face. He has come on business bent.
- That mighty pugilist, the Dublin Terror, is nightly on the stage, offering
- two hundred dollars to any amateur among boxers who shall remain before
- him four Queensberry rounds. Mike Menares, he of the candidly innocent
- countenance, desires to proffer himself as a sacrifice.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Youse is just in time, sport,&rdquo; remarks the brisk gamin to whom Mike has
- been committed, as he pilots the guileless one to the stage door. &ldquo;It&rsquo;s
- nine o&rsquo;clock now, an&rsquo; d&rsquo; Terror goes on to do his bag-t&rsquo;umpin&rsquo; turn at
- ten. After that comes d&rsquo; knockin&rsquo; out, see! But say! if youse was tired of
- livin&rsquo;, why didn&rsquo;t you jump in d&rsquo; East river? I&rsquo;d try d&rsquo; river an&rsquo;d&rsquo;
- morgue before I&rsquo;d come here to be murdered be d&rsquo; Terror.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike makes no retort to this, lacking lightness of temper. His gamin
- conductor throws open the stage door and signals Mike to enter.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Tell d&rsquo; butcher here&rsquo;s another calf for him,&rdquo; vouchsafes the gamin to the
- stage-hands inside the door.
- </p>
- <p>
- Let us go back four hours to a three-room tenement in Pitt Street. There
- are two rooms and a little kennel of a kitchen. The furnishings are rough
- and cheap and clean. The lady of the tenement, as the floors declare, is a
- miracle of soap and water. And the lady is little Mollie Lacy, aged eleven
- years.
- </p>
- <p>
- The family of the Pitt Street tenement is made up of three. There is Mike
- Menares, our hero; little Mollie; and, lastly, her brother Davy, aged
- nine. Little Davy is lame. He fell on the tenement stairs four years
- before and injured his hip. The hospital doctors took up the work where
- the tenement stairs left off, and Davy came from his sick-bed doomed to a
- crutch for life.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike Menares is half-brother of the younger ones. Nineteen years before,
- Mike&rsquo;s mother, Irish, with straw-colored hair and blue eyes, wedded one
- Menares, a Spanish Jew. This fortunate Menares was a well-looking, tall
- man; with hair black and stiffening in a natural pompadour. He kept a
- tobacco stall underneath a stair in Park Row, and was accounted rich by
- the awfully poor about him. He died, however, within the year following
- Mike&rsquo;s birth; and thus there was an end to the rather thoroughbred dark
- Spanish Jew.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike&rsquo;s mother essayed matrimony a second time. She selected as a partner
- in this experiment a shiftless, idle, easy creature named David Lacy, who
- would have been a plasterer had not his indolence defeated his craft.
- Little Mollie, and Davy of the clattering crutch, occurred as a kind of
- penalty of the nuptials.
- </p>
- <p>
- Three years and a half before we encounter this mixed household, Lacy, the
- worthless, sailed away on a China ship without notice or farewell. Some
- say he was &ldquo;shanghaied,&rdquo; and some that he went of free will. Mrs. Lacy
- adopted the former of the two theories.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;David Lacy, too idle to work ashore, assuredly would not go to sea where
- work and fare are tenfold harder.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus argued Mrs. Lacy. Still, a solution of Lacy&rsquo;s reasons for becoming a
- mariner late in life is not here important. He sailed and he never
- returned; and as Mrs. Lacy perished of pneumonia the following winter,
- they both may be permitted to quit this chronicle to be meddled with by us
- no further.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike Menares had witnessed fifteen years when his mother died. As
- suggested, he is a singularly handsome boy, and of an appearance likely to
- impress. From his Conemara mother, he received a yellow head of hair.
- Underneath are a pair of jet black brows, a hawkish nose, double rows of
- strong white teeth, and deep soft black eyes, as honest as a hound&rsquo;s, the
- plain bestowal of his Jewish father.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike was driving a delivery wagon for the great grocers, Mark &amp;
- Milford, when his mother died. This brought six dollars a week. After the
- sad going of his mother, Mike found a second situation where he might work
- evenings, and thereby add six further dollars to that stipend from Mark
- &amp; Milford. This until the other day continued. On twelve dollars a
- week, and with little Mollie&mdash;a notable housekeeper&mdash;to manage
- for the Pitt Street tenement, the composite house of Menares and Lacy
- fared well.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike&rsquo;s evening labors require a description. One Sarsfield O&rsquo;Punch, an
- expert of boxing and an athlete of some eminence, maintains a private
- gymnasium on Fifty-ninth street. This personage is known to his patrons as
- &ldquo;Professor O&rsquo;Punch.&rdquo; Mike, well-builded and lithe, broad of shoulder, deep
- of lung, lean of flank, a sort of half-grown Hercules, finds congenial
- employ as aid to Professor O&rsquo;Punch. Mike&rsquo;s primal duty is to box with
- those amateurs of the game who seek fistic enlightenment of his patron,
- and who have been carried by that scientist into regions of half-wisdom
- concerning the bruising art for which they moil. From eight o&rsquo;clock until
- eleven, Mike&rsquo;s destiny sets him, one after the other, before a full score
- of these would-be boxers, some small and some big, some good and some bad,
- some weak and some strong, but all zealous to a perspiring degree. These
- novices smite and spare not, and move with all their skill and strength to
- pummel Mike. They have, be it said, but indifferent success; for Mike,
- waxing expert among experts, side-steps and blocks and stops and ducks and
- gets away; and his performances in these defensive directions are the
- whisper of the school.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now and then he softly puts a glove on some eager face, or over some
- unguarded heart, or feather-like left-hooks some careless jaw, to the end
- that the other understand a peril and fend against it. But Mike, working
- lightly as a kitten, hurts no one; such being the private commands of
- Professor O&rsquo;Punch who knows that to pound a pupil is to lose a pupil.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is to be doubted if the easy-natured Mike is aware of his wonderful
- strength of arm and body, or the cat-like quickness and certainty of his
- blows. During these three years wherein he has been underling to Professor
- O&rsquo;Punch, Mike strikes but two hard blows. One evening several of the
- followers of Professor O&rsquo;Punch are determining their prowess on a machine
- intended to register the force of a blow. Following each other in a
- fashion of punching procession, these aspiring gymnasts, putting their
- utmost into the swings, strike with all steam. Four hundred to five
- hundred pounds says the register; this is vaunted as a vastly good
- account.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike, with folded arms and stripped to ring costume&mdash;his official
- robes&mdash;is looking on, a smile lighting his pleasant face. Mike is
- ever interested and ever silent.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the others smite, Mike beams with approval, but makes no comment. At
- last one observes:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Menares, how many pounds can you strike?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t know,&rdquo; replies Mike, in a surprised way, &ldquo;I never tried.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Try now,&rdquo; says the other; &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve a notion you could hit hard enough if you
- cared to.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The others second the speaker. Much and instant curiosity grows up as to
- what Mike can do with his hands if he puts his soul into it. There is not
- an amateur about but knows more of Mike than does the latter of himself.
- They know him as one perfect of defensive boxing; also, they recall the
- precise feather-like taps which Mike confers on the best of their muster
- whenever he chooses; but none has a least of knowledge of how bitterly
- hard Mike&rsquo;s glove might be sent home should ever his heart be given to the
- trial.
- </p>
- <p>
- Being urged, Mike begins to rouse; he himself grows curious. It has never
- come to him as a thought to make the experiment. The &ldquo;punching machine&rdquo;
- has stood there as part of the paraphernalia of the gymnasium. But to the
- fog-witted Mike, who comes to work for so many dollars a week and who has
- not once considered himself in the light of a boxer, whether excellent or
- the reverse, it held no particular attraction. It could tell him no
- secrets he cares a stiver to hear.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now, Mike for a first time feels moved to a bit of self-enlightenment.
- Poising himself for the effort, Mike, with the quickness of light, sends
- in a right-hand smash that all but topples the contrivance from its base.
- For the moment the muscles of his back and leg knot and leap in ropelike
- ridges; and then they as instantly sink away. The machine registers eight
- hundred and ninety-one pounds.
- </p>
- <p>
- The on-gazers draw a long breath. Then they turn their eyes on Mike, whose
- regular outlines, with muscles retreated again into curves and slopes and
- shimmering ripples, have no taint of the bruiser, and whose handsome
- features, innocent of a faintest ferocity, recall some beautiful statue
- rather than anything more viciously hard.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike&rsquo;s second earnest blow comes off in this sort. He is homeward bound
- from gymnasium work one frosty midnight. Not a block from his home, three
- evil folk of the night are standing beneath an electric light. Mike,
- unsuspicious, passes them. Instantly, one delivers a cut at Mike&rsquo;s head
- with a sandbag. Mike, warned by the shadow of uplifted arm, springs
- forward out of reach, wheels, and then as the footpad blunders towards
- him, Mike&rsquo;s left hand, clenched and hammerlike, goes straight to his face.
- Bone and teeth are broken with the shock of it; blood spurts, and the
- footpad comes senseless to the pave. His ally, one of the other two,
- grasps at Mike&rsquo;s throat. His clutch slips on the stern muscles of the
- athlete&rsquo;s neck as if the neck were a column of brass. Mike seizes his
- assailant&rsquo;s arm with his right hand; there is a twist and a shriek; the
- second robber rolls about with a dislocated fore-arm. The third, unharmed,
- flies screeching with the fear of death upon him.
- </p>
- <p>
- At full speed comes a policeman, warned of his duty by the howls of
- anguish. He surveys the two on the ground; one still and quiet, the other
- groaning and cursing with his twisted arm. The officer sends in an
- ambulance call. Then he surveys with pleased intentness the regular face
- of Mike, cool and unperturbed.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An Irish Sheeny!&rdquo; softly comments the officer to himself.
- </p>
- <p>
- He is expert of faces, is the officer, and deduces Mike&rsquo;s two-ply origin
- from his yellow hair, dark eye and curved nose.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You&rsquo;re part Irish and part Jew,&rdquo; observes the policeman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;My mother was from Ireland,&rdquo; answers Mike; &ldquo;my father was a Spanish Jew
- from Salamanca. I think that&rsquo;s what they call it, although I was not old
- enough when he died to remember much about him.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Irish crossed on Jew!&rdquo; comments the officer, still in a mood of
- thoughtful admiration. &ldquo;It&rsquo;s the best prize-ring strain in the world!&rdquo; The
- officer is in his dim way a patron of sport.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike thanks the other; for, while by no means clearly understanding, he
- feels that a compliment is meant. Then Mike goes homeward to Mollie and
- little Davy.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is the twenty-third of December&mdash;two days before Christmas&mdash;when
- we are first made friends of Mike Menares. About a month before, the
- little family of three fell upon bad days. Mike was dismissed by the great
- grocers, and the six dollars weekly from that quarter came to an end.
- Mike&rsquo;s delivery wagon was run down and crushed by a car; and, while Mike
- was not to blame, the grocers have no time to discover a justice, and Mike
- was told to go.
- </p>
- <p>
- For mere food and light and fire, Mike&rsquo;s other six Saturday dollars from
- Professor O&rsquo;Punch would with economy provide. But there is the rent on New
- Year&rsquo;s day! Also, and more near, is Christmas, with not a penny to spare.
- It must perforce be a bare festival, this Christmas. It will be a blow to
- little Davy of the crutch, who has talked only of Christmas for two months
- past and gone.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike, as has been intimated, is dull and slow of brain. He has just enough
- of education to be able to read and write. He owns no bad habits&mdash;no
- habits at all, in fact; and the one great passion of his simple heart is
- love without a limit for Mollie and little Davy. He lives for them; the
- least of their desires is the great concern of Mike&rsquo;s life. Therefore,
- when his income shrinks from twelve dollars to six, it creeps up on him
- and chills him as a loss to Mollie and Davy. And peculiarly does this
- sorrowful business of a ruined Christmas for Davy prey on poor Mike.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You and I won&rsquo;t mind,&rdquo; says housewife Mollie, looking up in Mike&rsquo;s face
- with the sage dignity of her eleven years, &ldquo;because we&rsquo;re old enough to
- understand; but I feel bad about little Davy. It&rsquo;s the first real awful
- Christmas we&rsquo;ve ever had.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Mollie is as bright and wise as Mike is dull. Seven years her senior,
- still Mike has grown to believe in and rely altogether on Mollie as a
- guide. He takes her commands without question, and does her will like a
- slave. To Mollie goes every one of Mike&rsquo;s dollars; it is Mollie who
- disposes of them, while Mike never gives them a thought. They have been
- devoted to the one purpose of Mike&rsquo;s labors; they have gone to Mollie and
- little Davy of the crutch; why, then, should Mike pursue them further?
- </p>
- <p>
- Following housewife Mollie&rsquo;s regrets over a sad Christmas that was not
- because of their poverty to be a Christmas, Mike sits solemnly by the
- window looking out on the gathering gloom and hurrying holiday crowds of
- Pitt Street. The folk are all poor; yet each seems able to do a bit for
- Christmas. As they hurry by, with small bundles and parcels, and now and
- then a basket from which protrude mayhap a turkey&rsquo;s legs or other symptom
- of the victory of Christmas, Mike, in the midst of his sluggish
- amiabilities, discovers a sense of pain&mdash;a darkish thought of
- trouble.
- </p>
- <p>
- And as if grief were to sharpen his wits, Mike has for almost a first and
- last time an original idea. It is the thought natural enough, when one
- reflects on Mike&rsquo;s engagements, evening in and evening out, with Professor
- O&rsquo;Punch.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0008" id="linkimage-0008"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0115.jpg" alt="0115 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0115.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- That day Mike, in passing through the Bowery, read the two hundred dollars
- offer of the selfconfident Terror. At that time Mike felt nothing save
- wonder that so great a fortune might be the reward of so small an effort.
- But it did not occur to him that he should try a tilt with the Terror. In
- his present stress, however, and with the woe upon him of a bad Christmas
- to dawn for little Davy, the notion marches slowly into Mike&rsquo;s
- intelligence. And it seems simple enough, too, now Mike has thought of it;
- and with nothing further of pro or con, he prepares himself for the
- enterprise.
- </p>
- <p>
- For causes not clear to himself he says nothing to housewife Mollie of his
- plans. But he alarms that little lady of the establishment&rsquo;s few sparse
- pots and kettles by declining to eat his supper. Mollie fears Mike is ill.
- The latter, knowing by experience just as any animal might, that with
- twelve minutes of violent exercise before him, he is better without, while
- denying the imputation of illness, sticks to his supperless resolve.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Mike goes into the rear room and dons blue tights, blue sleeveless
- shirt, canvas trunks, and light shoes; his working costume. Over these he
- draws trousers and a blue sweater; on top of all a heavy double-breasted
- jacket. Thrusting his feet, light shoes and all, into heavy snow-proof
- overshoes, and pulling on a bicycle cap, Mike is arrayed for the street.
- Mollie knows of these several preparations, the ring costume under the
- street clothes, but thinks naught of it, such being Mike&rsquo;s nightly custom
- as he departs for the academy of Professor O&rsquo;Punch. At the last moment,
- Mike kisses both Mollie and little Davy; and then, with a sudden original
- enthusiasm, he says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve been thinkin&rsquo;, Mollie; mebby I can get some money. Mebby we&rsquo;ll see a
- good Christmas, after all.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Mollie is dazed by the notion of Mike thinking; but she looks in his face,
- with its honest eyes full of love for her and Davy, and as beautiful as a
- god&rsquo;s and as unsophisticated, and in spite of herself a hope begins to
- live and lift up its head. Possibly Mike may get money; and Christmas, and
- the rent, and many another matter then pinching the baby housekeeper and
- of which she has made no mention to Mike, will be met and considered.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;ll be nice if you should get money, Mike,&rdquo; is all Mollie trusts
- herself to say, as she returns Mike&rsquo;s good-bye kiss.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Mike gets into Pitt Street he moves slowly. There&rsquo;s the crowd, for
- one thing. Then, too, it&rsquo;s over early for his contest with the Terror.
- Mike prefers to arrive at the theatre just in time to strip and make the
- required application for those two hundred dollars. It may appear strange,
- but it never once occurs to Mike that he will not last the demanded four
- rounds. But it seems such a weighty sum! Mike doubts if the offer be
- earnest; hesitates with the fear that the management will refuse to give
- him the money at the end.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But surely,&rdquo; decides Mike, &ldquo;they will feel as though they ought to give
- me something. I lose a dollar by not going to Professor O&rsquo;Punch&rsquo;s; they
- must take account of that.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike loiters along with much inborn ease of heart. Occasionally he pauses
- to gaze into one of the cheap shop windows, ablaze and garish of the
- season&rsquo;s wares. There is no wind; the air has no point; but it is snowing
- softly, persistently, flakes of a mighty size and softness.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ten minutes before he arrives at that theatre which has been the scene of
- the Terror&rsquo;s triumphs, Mike enters a bakery whereof the proprietor, a
- German, is known to him. Mike has no money but he feels no confusion for
- that.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;John,&rdquo; says Mike to the German; &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve got to spar a little to-night and I
- want a big plate of soup.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Sure!&rdquo; says John, leading the way to a rear room which thrives greasily
- as a kind of restaurant. &ldquo;And here, Mike,&rdquo; goes on John, as the soup
- arrives, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll put a big drink of sherry in it. You will feel good because
- of it, and the sherry and the hot soup will make you quick and strong
- already.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- At the finish, Mike, with an eye of bland innocence&mdash;for he is
- certain the theatre will give him something, even if it withhold the full
- two hundred&mdash;tells John he will pay for the soup within the hour,
- when he returns.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s all right, Mike,&rdquo; cries the good-natured baker, &ldquo;any time will
- do.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This w&rsquo;y, me cove,&rdquo; observes a person with a cockney accent, as the sharp
- gamin delivers Mike, together with the message to the Terror, at the stage
- door; &ldquo;this w&rsquo;y; &rsquo;ere&rsquo;s a dressin&rsquo; room for you to shift your
- togs.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Later, when Mike&rsquo;s outer husks are off and he stands arrayed for the ring,
- this person, who is old and gray and wears a scarred and battered visage,
- looks Mike over in approval:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You seems an amazin&rsquo; bit of stuff, lad,&rdquo; says this worthy man; &ldquo;the build
- of Tom Sayres at his best, but&rsquo;eavier. I &rsquo;opes you&rsquo;ll do this Mick,
- but I&rsquo;m afeared on it. You looks too pretty; an&rsquo; you ain&rsquo;t got a fightin&rsquo;
- face. How &rsquo;eavy be you, lad?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;One hundred and eighty-one,&rdquo; replies Mike, smiling on the Englishman with
- his boy&rsquo;s eyes.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Can you spar a bit?&rdquo; asks the other.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why, of course I can!&rdquo; and Mike&rsquo;s tones exhibit surprise.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Well, laddy,&rdquo; says the other; &ldquo;don&rsquo;t let this Dublin bloke rattle you. &rsquo;E&rsquo;s
- a great blow&rsquo;ard, I takes it, an&rsquo; will quit if he runs ag&rsquo;in two or three
- stiff &rsquo;uns. A score of years ago, I&rsquo;d a-give &rsquo;im a stone an&rsquo;
- done for &rsquo;im myself. I&rsquo;m to be in your corner, laddy, an&rsquo; I trusts
- you&rsquo;ll not disgrace me.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Who are you?&rdquo; asks Mike.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Oh, me?&rdquo; says the other; &ldquo;I works for the theayter, laddy, an&rsquo;, bein&rsquo; as
- &rsquo;ow I&rsquo;m used to fightin&rsquo;, I goes on to &rsquo;eel an&rsquo; &rsquo;andle
- the amatoors as goes arter the Terror. It&rsquo;s all square, laddy; I&rsquo;ll be
- be&rsquo;ind you; an&rsquo; I&rsquo;ll &rsquo;elp you to win those pennies if I sees a
- w&rsquo;y.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I have also the honor,&rdquo; shouts the loud master of ceremonies, &ldquo;to
- introduce to you Mike Men-ares, who will contend with the Dublin Terror.
- Should he stay four rounds, Marquis of Queens-berry rules, the management
- forfeits two hundred dollars to the said Menares.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What a model for my Jason,&rdquo; says a thin shaving of a man who stands as a
- spectator in the wings. He is an artist of note, and speaks to a friend at
- his elbow. &ldquo;What a model for my Jason! I will give him five dollars an
- hour for three hours a day. What&rsquo;s his name? Mike what?&rdquo; The battle is
- about to commence; the friend, tongue-tied of interest, makes no reply.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Dublin Terror is a rugged, powerful ruffian, with lumpy shoulders,
- thick short neck, and a shock gorilla head. His little gray eyes are
- lighted fiercely. His expression is as savagely bitter as Mike&rsquo;s is
- gentle. The creature, a fighter by nature, was born meaning harm to other
- men.
- </p>
- <p>
- There is a roped square, about eighteen feet each way, on the stage, in
- which the gladiators will box. The floor is canvas made safe with rosin.
- The master of cermonies, himself a pugilist of celebration, will act as
- referee. The old battered man of White Chapel is in Mike&rsquo;s corner.
- </p>
- <p>
- Another gentleman, with face similarly marred, but with Seven Dials as his
- nesting place, is posted opposite to befriend the Terror. There is much
- buzz in the audience&mdash;a rude gathering, it is&mdash;and a deal of
- sympathetic admiration and not a ray of hope for Mike in the eyes of those
- present.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Terror is replete of a riotous confidence and savage to begin. For two
- nights, such is the awe of him engendered among local bruisers, no one has
- presented himself for a meeting. This has made the Terror hungry for a
- battle; he feels like a bear unfed. As he stands over from Mike awaiting
- the call of &ldquo;Time,&rdquo; he looks formidable and forbidding, with his knotted
- arms and mighty hands.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike lounges in his place, the perfection of the athlete and picture of
- grace with power. His face, full of vacant amiability, shows pleased and
- interested as he looks out on the crowded, rampant house. Mike has rather
- the air of a spectator than a principal. The crowd does not shake him; he
- is not disturbed by the situation. In a fashion, he has been through the
- same thing every night, save Sunday, for three years. It comes commonplace
- enough to Mike.
- </p>
- <p>
- In a blurred way Mike resents the blood-eagerness which glows in the eyes
- of his enemy; but he knows no fear. It serves to remind him, however, that
- no restraints are laid upon him in favor of the brute across the ring, and
- that he is at liberty to hit with what lust he will.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Time!&rdquo; suddenly calls the referee.
- </p>
- <p>
- Those who entertained a forbode of trouble ahead for Mike are agreeably
- surprised. With the word &ldquo;Time!&rdquo; Mike springs into tremendous life like a
- panther aroused. His dark eyes glow and gleam in a manner to daunt.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Terror, a gallant headlong ruffian, throws himself upon Mike like a
- tornado. For full two minutes his blows fall like a storm. It does not
- seem of things possible that man could last through such a tempest. But
- Mike lasts; more than that, every blow of the Terror is stopped or
- avoided.
- </p>
- <p>
- It runs off like a miracle to the onlookers, most of whom know somewhat of
- self-defensive arts. That Mike makes no reprisals, essays no counterhits,
- does not surprise. A cautious wisdom would teach him to feel out and learn
- his man. Moreover, Mike is not there to attack; his mere mission is to
- stay four rounds.
- </p>
- <p>
- While spectators, with approving comment on Mike&rsquo;s skill and quickness,
- are reminding one another that Mike&rsquo;s business is &ldquo;simply to stay,&rdquo; Mike
- himself is coming to a different thought. He has grown disgusted rather
- than enraged by the attacks of the Terror. His thrice-trained eye notes
- each detail of what moves as a whirlwind to folk looking on; his arm and
- foot provide automatically for his defense and without direct effort of
- the brain. This leaves Mike&rsquo;s mind, dull as it is, with nothing to engage
- itself about save a contemplation of the Terror. In sluggish sort Mike
- begins to hold a vast dislike for that furious person.
- </p>
- <p>
- As this dislike commences to fire incipiently, he recalls the picture of
- Mollie and little Davy of the crutch. Mike remembers that it is after ten
- o&rsquo;clock, and his two treasures must be deep in sleep. Then he considers of
- Christmas, now but a day away; and of the money so necessary to the full
- pleasure of his sleeping Mollie and little Davy.
- </p>
- <p>
- As those home-visions come to Mike, and his antipathy to the Terror
- mounting to its height, the grim impulse claims him to attack. Tigerlike
- he steps back to get his distance; then he springs forward. It is too
- quickly done for eye to follow. The Terror&rsquo;s guard is opened by a feint;
- and next like a flash Mike&rsquo;s left shoots cleanly in. There is a sharp
- &ldquo;spank!&rdquo; as the six-ounce glove finds the Terror&rsquo;s jaw; that person goes
- down like an oak that is felled. As he falls, Mike&rsquo;s right starts with a
- crash for the heart. But there is no need: Mike stops the full blow midway&mdash;a
- feat without a mate in boxing. The Terror lies as one without life.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;W&rsquo;y didn&rsquo;t you let &rsquo;im &rsquo;ave your right like you started,
- laddy?&rdquo; screams the old Cockney, as Mike walks towards his corner.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mike laughs in his way of gentle, soft goodnature, and points where the
- Terror, white and senseless, bleeds thinly at nose and ear.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The left did it,&rdquo; Mike replies.
- </p>
- <p>
- Out of his eyes the hot light is already dying. He takes a deep, deep
- breath, that arches his great breast and makes the muscles clutch and
- climb like serpents; he stretches himself by extending his arms and
- standing high on his toes. Meanwhile he beams pleasantly on his grizzled
- adherent.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It wasn&rsquo;t much,&rdquo; says Mike.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You be the coolest cove, laddy!&rdquo; retorts the other in a rapt whisper.
- Then he towels deftly at the sweat on Mike&rsquo;s forehead.
- </p>
- <p>
- The decision has been given in Mike&rsquo;s favor. And to his delight, without
- argument or hesitation, the loud young man of the vociferous garb comes
- behind the scenes and endows him with two hundred dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Say,&rdquo; observes the loud young man, admiringly, &ldquo;you ain&rsquo;t no wonder, I
- don&rsquo;t t&rsquo;ink!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But how did you come to do it, Mike?&rdquo; asks the good-natured baker, as
- Mike lingers over a midnight porterhouse at the latter&rsquo;s restaurant.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I had to, John,&rdquo; says Mike, turning his innocent face on the other; &ldquo;I
- had to win Christmas money for Mollie and little Davy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And what,&rdquo; said the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;became of this Mike Menares?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I should suppose,&rdquo; broke in the Red Nosed Gentleman, who had followed the
- Jolly Doctor&rsquo;s narrative with relish, &ldquo;I should suppose now he posed for
- the little sculptor&rsquo;s Jason.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is my belief he did,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor, with a twinkle, &ldquo;and
- in the end he became full partner of the bruiser, O&rsquo;Punch, and shared the
- profits of the gymnasium instead of taking a dollar a night for his
- labors. His sister grew up and married, which, when one reflects on the
- experience of her mother, shows she owned no little of her brother&rsquo;s
- courage.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Your story,&rdquo; remarked the Red Nosed Gentleman to the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;and
- the terrific blow which this Menares dealt the Dublin Terror brings to mv
- mind a blow my father once struck.&rdquo; This was a cue to the others and one
- quickly seized on; the Red Nosed Gentleman was urged to give the story of
- that paternal blow. First seeing to it that the stock of burgundy at his
- elbow was ample, and freighting his own and the Jolly Doctor&rsquo;s glasses to
- the brim, the Red Nosed Gentleman coughed, cleared his throat, and then
- gave us the tale of That Stolen Ace of Hearts.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0008" id="link2HCH0008"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER VIII.&mdash;THAT STOLEN ACE OF HEARTS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>hen I, at the
- unripe age of seventeen, left my father&rsquo;s poor cottage-house on Tom&rsquo;s Run
- and threw myself into life&rsquo;s struggle, I sought Pittsburg as a nearest
- promising arena of effort. I had a small place at a smaller wage as a sort
- of office boy and porter for a down-town establishment devoted to a
- commerce of iron; but as I came early to cut my connection with that hard
- emporium we will not dwell thereon.
- </p>
- <p>
- I have already told you how by nature I was a gambler. I had inborn
- hankerings after games of chance, and it was scant time, indeed, before I
- found myself on terms of more or less near acquaintance with every card
- sharper of the city. And I became under their improper tutelage an expert
- cheat myself. At short cards and such devices as faro and roulette, I soon
- knew each devious turn and was in excellent qualification to pillage my
- way to eminence if not to riches among the nimble-fingered nobility of the
- green tables into whose midst I had coaxed or crowded my way. Vast was my
- ambition to soar as a blackleg, and no student at his honest books burned
- with more fire to succeed. I became initiate into such mysteries as the
- &ldquo;bug,&rdquo; the &ldquo;punch,&rdquo; the &ldquo;hold-out&rdquo;; I could deal &ldquo;double&rdquo; or &ldquo;from the
- bottom;&rdquo; was a past master of those dubious faro inventions, the &ldquo;snake,&rdquo;
- the &ldquo;end squeeze,&rdquo; and the &ldquo;balance top;&rdquo; could &ldquo;put back&rdquo; with a clean
- deftness that might deceive even my masters in evil doing, and with an eye
- like a hawk read a deck of marked cards with the same easy certainty that
- I read the alphabet. It was a common compliment to my guilty merit that no
- better craftsman at crooked play ever walked in Diamond Alley.
- </p>
- <p>
- No, as I&rsquo;ve heretofore explained, there dawned a day when I gave up card
- gambling and played no more. It is now twenty years since I wagered so
- much as a two-bit piece in any game other than the Wall Street game of
- stocks. And yet it was no moral arousal that drew me from roulette, from
- farobank and from draw poker. I merely awoke to the truth that the
- greatest simpleton of cards is the professional gambler himself; and with
- that I turned my back on the whole scurvy business and quit the dens for
- the exchange. And with no purpose to preach, I say openly and with a
- fullest freedom that the game of stock speculation is as replete of traps
- and pitfalls, and of as false and blackleg character as any worst game of
- iniquitous faro that is dealt with trimmed and sanded deck from a
- dishonest box. As an arena of morals the stock exchange presents no
- conscious improvement beyond what is offered by the veriest dead-fall ever
- made elate with those two rings at the bell which tell the waiting inmates
- that some &ldquo;steerer&rdquo; is on the threshold with rustic victim to be fleeced.
- I once read that the homestead of Captain Kidd, the pirate, stood two
- centuries ago on that plot of ground now covered by the New York Stock
- Exchange; and I confess to a smile when I reflected how the spirit of
- immortal rapine would seem to hover over the place. The exchange is a fit
- successor to the habitat of that wild freebooter who died and dried in
- execution dock when long ago the Stuart Anne was queen.
- </p>
- <p>
- During those earlier months in Pittsburg, I was not permitted by my father&mdash;who
- had much control of me, even unto the day of his death&mdash;to altogether
- abandon Tom&rsquo;s Run, and the good, grimy miner folk, its inhabitants. My
- week&rsquo;s holiday began with each Saturday&rsquo;s noon; from that hour until
- Monday morning I was free; and thus, obeying my father&rsquo;s behests, Saturday
- evening and Sunday, I was bound to pass beneath my parents&rsquo; roof.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was during one of these visits home when I first cheated at cards&mdash;memorable
- event!&mdash;and it was on another that my roguery was discovered and my
- father struck that blow.
- </p>
- <p>
- As already stated, my father was of Welsh extraction. It was no less the
- fact, however, that his original stock was Irish; his grandfather&mdash;I
- believe it to have been that venerable and I trust respected gentleman&mdash;coming
- to Wales from somewhere on the banks of the Blackwater. And my father,
- excellent man! had vast pride in his Irish lineage and grew never so
- angry, particularly if a bit heated of his Saturday evening cups, as when
- one spoke of him as offshoot of the rocky land of leeks and saintly David.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What!&rdquo; he would cry; &ldquo;because I was born in Wales, do you take me for an
- onion-eating Welshman? Man, I&rsquo;m Irish and don&rsquo;t make that mistake again!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The vigor wherewith his mine-hardened fist smote the table as conclusion
- to this, carried such weight of emphasis that no man was ever found to
- fall a second time into the error.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myself, the question whether my ancestors were Welsh or Irish held
- little interest. I was looking forward not backward, and a hot avarice to
- hunt dollars drove from my bosom the last trace of concern touching a
- genealogy. I would sooner have one year&rsquo;s run of uninterrupted luck at a
- gambling table than to know myself a direct descendant of the
- Plantagenets. Not so my dear old father; to the hour when death closed his
- eyes&mdash;already sightless for ten years&mdash;burned out with a blast,
- they were&mdash;he ceased not to regale me with tales of that noble line
- of dauntless Irish from whom we drew our blood. For the ten years
- following the destruction of his eyes by powder, I saw much of my father,
- for I established him at a little country tavern near enough to the ocean
- to hear the surf and smell the salt breath of it, and two or three times a
- week I made shift to get down where he was. And whether my stay was for an
- hour or for a night&mdash;as on Sunday this latter came often to be the
- chance&mdash;he made his pedigree, or what he dreamed was such, the proud
- burden of his conversation.
- </p>
- <p>
- Brian Boru, I remember, was an original wellhead of our family. My father
- was tireless in his settings forth of this hero king of Munster; nor did
- he fail at the close of his story to curse the assassin who struck down
- Boru at Clontarf. Sometimes to tease him, I&rsquo;d argue what must have been
- the weak and primitive inconsequence of the royal Boru. I&rsquo;d suggest that
- by the sheer narrowness and savagery of the hour wherein that monarch
- lived, he could have been nothing more royal than the mere king of a kale
- patch, and probably wore less of authority with still less of revenue and
- reverence than belong commonly with any district leader of Tammany Hall.
- </p>
- <p>
- At these base doubtings my parent&rsquo;s wrath would mount. He would wax vivid
- with a picture of the majesty and grandeur of the great Boru; and of the
- halls wherein he fed and housed a thousand knights compared with whom in
- riches, magnificence, and chivalrous feats those warriors who came about
- King Arthur&rsquo;s round table showed paltry, mean and low. To crown narration
- he would ascribe to Boru credit as a world&rsquo;s first law giver and hail him
- author of the &ldquo;Code Brian.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Shure!&rdquo; he would say; &ldquo;he called his scholars and his penmen about him
- and he made them write down as the wor-rds fell from th&rsquo; mouth av him th&rsquo;
- whole of th&rsquo; Code Brian; an&rsquo; this in tur-rn was a model of th&rsquo; Code
- Napoleon that makes th&rsquo; law av Fr-rance to-day.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was in vain I pointed out that Napoleon&rsquo;s Code found its roots and as
- well, its models, in the Corpus Juris Civilis of Justinian&mdash;I had
- learned so much Latin from Father Glennon&mdash;and that nowhere in the
- English law was the Code Brian, as he called it, so much as adverted to.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; that&rsquo;s th&rsquo; Sassenach jealousy av thim!&rdquo; he would say. &ldquo;An&rsquo; who was
- this Justinian? Who, indade, but a thievin&rsquo; Roman imp&rsquo;ror who shtole his
- laws from King Boru just as th&rsquo; Dagoes now are shtealin&rsquo; th&rsquo; jobs at th&rsquo;
- mines from th&rsquo; Irish an&rsquo; Welsh lads to whom they belong av r-rights.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- After this I said no more; I did not explain that Justinian and his
- Pandects and the others of his grand body of civil law were in existence
- five centuries before the martyred Boru was born. That discovery would
- have served no purpose beyond my parent&rsquo;s exasperation and earned for
- myself as well as the world&rsquo;s historians naught save a cataract of hard
- words.
- </p>
- <p>
- You marvel, perhaps, why I dwell with such length on the memory of my
- father&mdash;a poor, blind, ignorant miner of coal! I loved the old man;
- and to this day when my hair, too, is gray and when I may win my wealth
- and count my wealth and keep my wealth with any of the land, I recall him
- as the only man for whom I ever felt either love or confidence or real
- respect.
- </p>
- <p>
- Yes; I heard much of the blood of the truculent yet wise Boru; also of
- younger ancestors who fought for the Stuarts against Cromwell, against
- Monmouth, against William; and later in both the &ldquo;Fifteen&rdquo; and in the
- &ldquo;Forty-five.&rdquo; Peculiarly was I made to know of my mother&rsquo;s close
- connection by blood with the house of that brave Sarsfield &ldquo;who,&rdquo; as my
- father explained, &ldquo;fairly withstud th&rsquo; Dootchman at th&rsquo; Boyne; an&rsquo; later
- made him quit befure th&rsquo; walls av Limerick.&rdquo; There was one tradition of
- the renowned Sarsfield which the old gentleman was peculiarly prone to
- relate, and on the head of him who distrusted the legend there was sure to
- fall a storm. That particular tale concerned the Irish soldier and the
- sword of Wallace wight.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thish William Wallace,&rdquo; my father was wont to say as he approached the
- myth, &ldquo;was a joint (giant), no less. He was nine fut &rsquo;leven inches
- tall an&rsquo; his soord was eight fut foore inches long. It&rsquo;s in Stirlin&rsquo;
- Cashtle now, an&rsquo; there niver was but one man besides Wallace who cud
- handle it. Th&rsquo; Black Douglas an&rsquo; all av thim Scotchmen thried it an&rsquo;
- failed. Whin, one day, along comes Gin&rsquo;ral Patrick Sarsfield&mdash;a
- little bit av a felly, only five fut siven inches tall&mdash;an&rsquo; he tuk
- that soord av William Wallace in one hand an&rsquo;, me son, he made it
- whishtle.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But I must press to my first crime of cards or your patience will desert.
- During those summer months on Tom&rsquo;s Run when the mines were open and my
- father and his mates of the pick and blast were earning their narrow pay,
- it was the habit of himself and four or five other gentlemen of coal to
- gather in the Toni&rsquo;s Run Arms when Saturday evening came on, and relax
- into that amusement dear to Ireland as &ldquo;forty-five.&rdquo; Usually they played
- for a dime a corner; on occasional rich evenings the stakes mounted
- dizzily to two-bits, though this last was not often.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now I was preyed on by a desire to make one at this Saturday contention,
- but my father would never consent.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Jack,&rdquo; he&rsquo;d say; &ldquo;you&rsquo;d only lose your money. Shure! you&rsquo;re nawthin&rsquo; but
- a boy an&rsquo; not fit to pla-ay cards with th&rsquo; loikes av grown-up men.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But I persisted; I argued&mdash;to myself, you may be certain&mdash;while
- I might be no match for these old professors of forty-five who played the
- game with never a mistake, if I, like them, played honestly, that the
- cunning work I meditated could not fail to bring me in the wealth.
- </p>
- <p>
- At last one of the others came to my rescue.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Let him pla-ay, Mishter Roche,&rdquo; he said. &ldquo;Let&rsquo;s win his money fr-rom him
- an&rsquo; it&rsquo;ll be a lesson. He&rsquo;ll not lose much befure he&rsquo;ll be gla-ad to
- quit.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;All right, thin,&rdquo; replied my father; &ldquo;you can pla-ay, Jack, till you lose
- fifty cints; an&rsquo; that&rsquo;ll do ye. Moind now! whin you lose fifty cints you
- shtop.&rdquo; And so I was made one of the circle.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I foresaw, I did not lose the four-bits which my indulgent parent had
- marked as the limits of farthest sacrifice to my ambitious innocence.
- Already I had brought back to Tom&rsquo;s Run a curious trick or two from
- Pittsburg. It soon came to be my &ldquo;deal,&rdquo; and the moment I got the cards in
- my hands I abstracted the ace of hearts&mdash;a most doughty creature in
- this game of forty-five!&mdash;and dropped it in my lap, covering the fact
- from vulgar eyes with a fold of my handkerchief. That was all the chicane
- I practiced; I kept myself in constant possession of the ace of hearts and
- played it at a crisis; and at once the wagered dimes of the others began
- to travel into my illicit pockets where they made a merry jingle, I
- warrant you!
- </p>
- <p>
- The honest Irish from whom I was filching these small tributes never once
- bethought that I might play them sharp; they attributed my gains to luck
- and loud was exclamation over my good fortune. Time and again, for I was
- not their equal as a mere player, I&rsquo;d board the wrong card. When I&rsquo;d make
- such a mistake, one of them would cry: &ldquo;D&rsquo;ye moind that now! D&rsquo;ye moind
- how ba-ad he plays!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; yet,&rdquo; another would add, &ldquo;an&rsquo; yet he rakes th&rsquo; money!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Altogether I regarded my entrance into this ten-cent game of forty-five a
- most felicitous affair. I won at every sitting; getting up on some
- occasions with as much as eight dollars of profit for my evening&rsquo;s work.
- In those days I went willingly to Tom&rsquo;s Run, quitting Pittsburg without a
- sigh; and such was my ardor to fleece these coaldigging comrades of my
- father&mdash;and for that matter, my father, also; for like your true
- gambler, I played no favorites and was as warm to gather in the dimes of
- my parent as any&mdash;that I was usually found waiting about the
- forty-five table when, following supper, they appeared. And it all went
- favorably with me for perhaps a dozen sittings; my aggregate gains must
- have reached the mighty sum of sixty dollars. Of a merry verity! silver
- was at high tide in my hands!
- </p>
- <p>
- One evening as the half dozen devoted to the science of forty-five drew up
- to the table&mdash;myself a stripling boy, the others bearded miner men&mdash;my
- father complained of an ache in his head or an ache in his stomach or some
- malady equally cogent, and said he would not play.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll have me poipe an&rsquo; me mug av beer,&rdquo; he said, &ldquo;an&rsquo; resht mesilf a bit.
- It&rsquo;s loike I&rsquo;ll feel betther afther a whoile an&rsquo; then I&rsquo;ll take a haand.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Play began, while my suffering father with his aches, his tobacco and his
- beer, sat nursing himself at a near-by table. I lost no time in acquiring
- my magic ace of hearts and at once the stream of usual fortune set in to
- flow my way.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ten years, yes, one year later, my suspicions touching my father&rsquo;s illness
- and his reasons for this unprecedented respite from the cares of
- forty-five would have stood more on tiptoe. As it was, however, it never
- assailed me as a thought that I had become the subject of ancestral
- doubts. I cheated on and on, and made hay while the sun shone with never a
- cloud in the sky.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was not noticed by me, but following a halfhour&rsquo;s play and while I was
- shuffling the cards for a deal, my parent stole noiselessly behind my
- chair. He reached under my arm and lifted the corner of the concealing
- handkerchief which filled my lap. Horrors! there lay the tell-tale ace of
- hearts!
- </p>
- <p>
- Even then I realized nothing and knew not that my villainy was made bare.
- This news, however, was not long in its arrival.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Niver did I r-raise a boy to be a r-robber!&rdquo; roared my father.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coincident with this remark, the paternal hand&mdash;not the lightest nor
- least formidable on Tom&rsquo;s Run&mdash;dealt me a buffet on the head that
- lifted me from my sinful chair and hurled me across the room and against
- the wall full fifteen feet away. My teeth clattered, my wits reeled, while
- my ill-gotten silver danced blithely to metallic music of its own.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Niver did I r-raise a boy to be a r-robber!&rdquo; again shouted my father.
- Then seizing me by the collar, he lifted me to my feet. &ldquo;Put all your
- money on the ta-able!&rdquo; he cried; &ldquo;put ivry groat av it!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- There was no escape; I was powerless in the talons of an inexorable fate.
- My pockets yielded a harvest of hardby seventy-five dollars&mdash;something
- more than the total of my winnings&mdash;and this was placed in the center
- of the table which had so lately witnessed my skill. An even distribution
- was then made by my father among the victims, each getting his share of
- the recovered treasure; my father keeping none for himself though urged by
- the others to that end.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;No,&rdquo; said my father; &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll touch niver a penny av it. You take th&rsquo; money;
- I&rsquo;ll make shift that the dishgrace of bein&rsquo; fa-ather to a rapparee shall
- do for me share!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- With that, he withdrew from the scene of my downfall, carrying me fast in
- his clutch; and later&mdash;bathed in tears of pain and shame&mdash;I was
- dragged into the presence of my mother and Father Glennon by the
- ignominious ear.
- </p>
- <p>
- It did not cure me of cards, however; I ran the whole gamut of gambling
- and won dangerous prominence as a sharper of elevation and rank. To-morrow
- evening, should you care to listen, I may unfold concerning other of my
- adventures; I may even relate&mdash;as a tale most to my diplomatic glory,
- perhaps&mdash;how I brought Casino Joe to endow me with that great secret,
- richer, in truth! than the mines of Peru! of &ldquo;How to Tell the Last Four.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Speakin&rsquo; of gamblin&rsquo;,&rdquo; observed the Old Cattleman when the Red Nosed
- Gentleman had come to a full stop, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll bet a bloo stack that as we-alls
- sets yere talkin&rsquo;, the games is goin&rsquo; brisk an&rsquo; hot in Wolfville. Thar
- won&rsquo;t be no three foot of snow to put a damper on trade an&rsquo; hobble a
- gent&rsquo;s energies in Arizona.&rdquo; This last with a flush of pride.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Does everybody gamble in the West?&rdquo; asked the Sour Gentleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Every sport who&rsquo;s got the dinero does,&rdquo; responded the Old Cattleman.
- &ldquo;White folks, Injuns an&rsquo; Mexicans is right now at roulette an&rsquo; faro bank
- an&rsquo; monte as though they ain&rsquo;t got a minute to live. I hates to concede &rsquo;em
- so much darin&rsquo;, but the Mexicans, speshul, is zealous for specyoolations.
- Which they&rsquo;d shore wager their immortal souls on the turn of a kyard, only
- a Greaser&rsquo;s soul don&rsquo;t own no market valyoo.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;If you will,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;you might tell us something of
- Mexicans and their ways, their labors and relaxations&mdash;their loves
- and their hates. I&rsquo;d be pleased to hear of those interesting people from
- one who knows them so thoroughly.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which I shore knows &rsquo;em,&rdquo; returned the Old Cattleman, &ldquo;an&rsquo; as I
- concedes how each gent present oughter b&rsquo;ar his share of the
- entertainment, I&rsquo;ll tell you of Chiquita of Chaparita.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0009" id="link2HCH0009"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER IX.&mdash;CHIQUITA OF CHAPARITA.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>hich I doubts some
- if I&rsquo;m a proper party to be a historian of Mexicans. Nacherally I abhors
- &rsquo;em; an&rsquo; when a gent abhors anything, that is a Caucasian gent,
- you-all can gamble the limit he won&rsquo;t do it jestice. His prejudices is
- bound to hit the surface like one of these yere rock ledges in the
- mountains. Be white folks ag&rsquo;in Mexicans? Gents, the paleface is ag&rsquo;in
- everybody but himse&rsquo;f; ag&rsquo;in Mexicans, niggers, Injuns, Chinks&mdash;he&rsquo;s
- ag&rsquo;in &rsquo;em all; the paleface is overbearin&rsquo; an&rsquo; insolent, an&rsquo;
- because he&rsquo;s the gamest fighter he allows he&rsquo;s app&rsquo;inted of Providence to
- prance &lsquo;round, tyrannizin&rsquo; an&rsquo; makin&rsquo; trouble for everybody whose color
- don&rsquo;t match his own. Shore, I&rsquo;m as bad as others; only I ain&rsquo;t so bigoted
- I don&rsquo;t savey the fact.
- </p>
- <p>
- Doc Peets is the one white gent I encounters who&rsquo;s willin&rsquo; to mete out to
- Mexicans a squar&rsquo; deal from a squar&rsquo; deck. I allers reckons these yere
- equities on Peets&rsquo; part arises a heap from his bein&rsquo; a scientist. You take
- a scientist like Peets an&rsquo; the science in him sort o&rsquo; submerges an&rsquo; drowns
- out what you-all might term the racial notions native to the hooman soil.
- They comes to concloosions dispassionate, that a-way, scientists does; an&rsquo;
- Mexicans an&rsquo; Injuns reaps a milder racket at their hands. With sech folks
- as Old Man Enright an&rsquo; me, who&rsquo;s more indoorated an&rsquo; acts on that
- arrogance which belongs with white folks at birth, inferior races don&rsquo;t
- stand no dazzlin&rsquo; show.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mexicans, as a herd, is stunted an&rsquo; ondeveloped both mental an&rsquo; physical.
- They bears the same compar&rsquo;son to white folks that these yere little
- broncos does to the big hosses of the States. In intellects, Mexicans is
- about &rsquo;leven hands high. To go into one of their jimcrow plazas is
- like retreatin&rsquo; back&rsquo;ard three hundred years. Their idees of agriculture
- is plenty primitive. An&rsquo; their minds is that bogged down in ignorance
- you-all can&rsquo;t teach &rsquo;em nothin&rsquo;. They clings to their worm-eaten
- customs like a miser to his money. Their plow is a wedge of wood; they
- hooks on about three yoke of bulls&mdash;measley, locoed critters&mdash;an&rsquo;
- with four or five Greasers to screech an&rsquo; herd an&rsquo; chunk up the anamiles
- they goes stampedin&rsquo; back&rsquo;ard an&rsquo; for&rsquo;ard on their sandy river-bottom
- fields&mdash;the same bein&rsquo; about as big as a saddle blanket&mdash;an&rsquo;
- they calls that plowin&rsquo;. They sows the grain as they plows, sort o&rsquo;
- scratches it in; an&rsquo; when it comes up they don&rsquo;t cut it none same as
- we-all harvests a crop. No; they ain&rsquo;t capable of sech wisdom. They pulls
- it up by the roots an&rsquo; ties it in bundles. Then they sweeps off a clean
- spot of earth like the floor of one of these yere brickyards an&rsquo; covers it
- with the grain same as if it&rsquo;s a big mat. Thar&rsquo;s a corral constructed
- &lsquo;round it of posts an&rsquo; lariats; an&rsquo; next, on top of the mat of grain, they
- drives in the loose burros, cattle, goats, an&rsquo; all things else that&rsquo;s got
- a hoof; an&rsquo; tharupon they jams this menagerie about ontil the grain is
- trodden out. That&rsquo;s what a Greaser regyards as threshin&rsquo; grain, so you can
- estimate how ediotic he is. When it&rsquo;s trompled sufficient, he packs off
- the stalks an&rsquo; straw to make mats an&rsquo; thatches for the &rsquo;dobies;
- while he scrapes up the dust an&rsquo; wheat into a blanket an&rsquo; climbs onto the
- roof of his <i>casa</i> an&rsquo; pours it down slow onto the ground, an&rsquo; all so
- it gives the wind a openin&rsquo; to get action an&rsquo; blow away the chaff an&rsquo;
- dust.
- </p>
- <p>
- But what&rsquo;s the use of dilatin&rsquo; on savageries like that? I could push
- for&rsquo;ard an&rsquo; relate how they makes flour with a stone rollin&rsquo;-pin in a
- stone trough; how they grinds coffee by wroppin&rsquo; it in a gunny sack an&rsquo;
- beatin&rsquo; it with a rock; but where&rsquo;s the good? It would only go lowerin&rsquo;
- your estimates of hooman nature to no end.
- </p>
- <p>
- Whatever be their amoosements? Everything on earth amooses &rsquo;em.
- They has so many holidays, Mexicans does, they ain&rsquo;t hardly left no time
- for work. They&rsquo;re pirootin&rsquo; about constant, grinnin&rsquo; an&rsquo; chatterin&rsquo; like a
- outfit of bloo-jays.
- </p>
- <p>
- No; they ain&rsquo;t singers none. Takin&rsquo; feet an&rsquo; fingers, that a-way, a
- Mexican is moosical. They emerges a heap strong at dancin&rsquo;, an&rsquo; when it
- conies to a fandango, hens on hot griddles is examples of listless
- abstraction to &rsquo;em. With sech weepons, too, as guitars an&rsquo; fiddles
- an&rsquo; a gourd half-full of gravel to shake an&rsquo; beat out the time, they can
- make the scenery ring. Thar they stops, however; a Greaser&rsquo;s moosic never
- mounts higher than the hands. At singin&rsquo;, crows an&rsquo; guinea chickens lays
- over &rsquo;em like a spade flush over nines-up.
- </p>
- <p>
- Most likely if I reelates to you-all the story of a day among the Mexicans
- you comes to a cl&rsquo;arer glimpse of their loves an&rsquo; hates an&rsquo; wars an&rsquo;
- merry-makin&rsquo;s. Mexicans, like Injuns when a paleface is about, lapses into
- shyness an&rsquo; timidity same as one of these yere cottontail rabbits. But
- among themse&rsquo;fs, when they feels onbuckled an&rsquo; at home, their play runs
- off plenty different. Tharfore a gent&rsquo;s got to study Mexicans onder
- friendly auspices, an&rsquo; from the angle of their own home-life, if he&rsquo;s out
- to rope onto concloosions concernin&rsquo; them that&rsquo;ll stand the tests of
- trooth.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s one time when I&rsquo;m camped in the Plaza Chaparita. It&rsquo;s doorin&rsquo; the
- eepock when I freights from Vegas to the Canadian over the old Fort Bascom
- trail. One of the mules&mdash;the nigh swing mule, he is&mdash;quits on
- me, an&rsquo; I has to lay by ontil that mule recovers his sperits.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s a <i>fieste</i> or holiday at the Plaza Chaparita. The first local
- sport I connects with is the padre. He&rsquo;s little, brown, an&rsquo; friendly; an&rsquo;
- has twinklin&rsquo; beady eyes like a rattlesnake; the big difference bein&rsquo; that
- the padre&rsquo;s eyes is full of fun, whereas the optics of rattlesnakes is
- deevoid of humor utter. Shore; rattlesnakes wouldn&rsquo;t know a joke from the
- ace of clubs.
- </p>
- <p>
- The padre&rsquo;s on his way to the &rsquo;dobe church; an&rsquo; what do you-all
- figger now that divine&rsquo;s got onder his arm? Hymn books, says you? That&rsquo;s
- where you&rsquo;re barkin&rsquo; at a knot. The padre&rsquo;s packin&rsquo; a game chicken&mdash;which
- the steel gaffs, drop-socket they be an&rsquo; of latest sort, is in his pocket&mdash;an&rsquo;
- as I goes squanderin&rsquo; along in his company, he informs me that followin&rsquo;
- the services thar&rsquo;ll be a fight between his chicken an&rsquo; a rival brass-back
- belongin&rsquo; to a commoonicant named Romero. The padre desires my presence,
- an&rsquo; in a sperit of p&rsquo;liteness I allows I&rsquo;ll come idlein&rsquo; over onless
- otherwise engaged, the same bein&rsquo; onlikely.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gents, you should have witnessed that battle! It&rsquo;s shore lively carnage;
- yes, the padre&rsquo;s bird wins an&rsquo; downs Romero&rsquo;s entry the second buckle.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the tail of the padre&rsquo;s triumph, one of his parishioners gets locoed,
- shakes a chicken outen a bag an&rsquo; proclaims that he&rsquo;ll fight him ag&rsquo;in the
- world for two dollars a side. At that another enthoosiast gives notice
- that if the first parishioner will pinch down his bluff to one dollar&mdash;he
- says he don&rsquo;t believe in losin&rsquo; an&rsquo; winnin&rsquo; fortunes on a chicken&mdash;he&rsquo;ll
- prodooce a bird an&rsquo; go him once.
- </p>
- <p>
- The match is made, an&rsquo; while the chickens is facin&rsquo; each other a heap
- feverish an&rsquo; fretful, peckin&rsquo; an&rsquo; see-sawin&rsquo; for a openin&rsquo;, the various
- Greasers who&rsquo;s bet money on &rsquo;em lugs out their beads an&rsquo; begins to
- pray to beat four of a kind. Shore, they&rsquo;re prayin&rsquo; that their partic&rsquo;lar
- chicken &rsquo;ll win. Still, when I considers that about as many
- Greasers is throwin&rsquo; themse&rsquo;fs at the throne of grace for one as for the
- other, if Providence is payin&rsquo; any attention to &rsquo;em&mdash;an&rsquo; I
- deems it doubtful&mdash;I estimates that them orisons is a stand-off.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the birds goes to the center, one party sprinkles something on his
- chicken. At that the opposition grabs up his bird an&rsquo; appeals to the
- padre. He challenges the other&rsquo;s bird because he says he&rsquo;s been sprinkled
- with holy-water.
- </p>
- <p>
- The padre inquires, an&rsquo; the holy-water sharp confesses his guilt. Also, he
- admits that he hides the gaffs onder the altar cloth doorin&rsquo; the recent
- services so they&rsquo;ll acquire extra grace an&rsquo; power.
- </p>
- <p>
- The padre turns severe at this an&rsquo; declar&rsquo;s the fight off; an&rsquo; he forfeits
- the doctored chicken an&rsquo; the gaffs to himse&rsquo;f a whole lot&mdash;he
- representin&rsquo; the church&mdash;to teach the holy-water sharp that yereafter
- he&rsquo;s not to go seizin&rsquo; onfair advantages, an&rsquo; to lead a happier an&rsquo; a
- better life. That culprit don&rsquo;t say a word but passes over his chicken an&rsquo;
- the steel regalia for its heels. You can bet that padre&rsquo;s word is law in
- the Plaza Chaparita!
- </p>
- <p>
- Followin&rsquo; this fiasco of the holy-water chicken the Mexicans disperses
- themse&rsquo;fs to pulque an&rsquo; monte an&rsquo; the dance. The padre an&rsquo; me sa&rsquo;nters
- about; me bein&rsquo; a Americano, an&rsquo; him what you might call professionally
- sedate, we-all don&rsquo;t go buttin&rsquo; into the <i>baile</i> nor the pulque nor
- the gamblin&rsquo;. The padre su&rsquo;gests that we go a-weavin&rsquo; over to his own
- camp, which he refers to as Casa Dolores&mdash;though thar&rsquo;s nothin&rsquo;
- dolorous about it, the same bein&rsquo; the home of mirth an&rsquo; hilarity, that
- a-way&mdash;an&rsquo; he allows he&rsquo;s got some Valley Tan hived up that&rsquo;ll make
- me forget my nationality if stoodiously adhered to. It&rsquo;s needless to
- observe that I accompanies the beady-eyed padre without a struggle. An&rsquo; I
- admits, free an&rsquo; without limitation, that said Valley Tan merits the
- padre&rsquo;s encomiums an&rsquo; fixes me in my fav&rsquo;rite theery that no matter what
- happens, the best happens to the church.
- </p>
- <p>
- As we crosses the little Plaza on our way to Casa Dolores we passes in
- front of the church. Thar on the grass lays the wooden image of the patron
- saint of the Plaza Chaparita. This figger is about four foot long, an&rsquo;
- thar&rsquo;s a hossha&rsquo;r lariat looped onto it where them Mexicans who gets
- malcontent with the saint ropes him off his perch from up in front of the
- church. They&rsquo;ve been haulin&rsquo; the image about an&rsquo; beatin&rsquo; it with cactus
- sticks an&rsquo; all expressive of disdain.
- </p>
- <p>
- I asks the padre why his congregation engages itse&rsquo;f in studied contoomely
- towards the Plaza&rsquo;s saint. He shrugs his shoulders, spreads his hands palm
- out, an&rsquo; says it&rsquo;s because the Plaza&rsquo;s sheep gets sick. I su&rsquo;gests that
- him an&rsquo; me cut in an&rsquo; rescoo the saint; more partic&rsquo;lar since the image is
- all alone, an&rsquo; the outfit that&rsquo;s been beatin&rsquo; him up has abandoned said
- corrections to drink pulque an&rsquo; exercise their moccasins in the <i>baile</i>.
- But the padre shakes his head. He allows it&rsquo;s a heap better to let the
- public fully vent its feelin&rsquo;s. He explains that when the sheep gets well
- the congregation &rsquo;ll round-up the image, give him a reproachful
- talk an&rsquo; a fresh coat of paint, an&rsquo; put him back on his perch. The saint
- &rsquo;ll come winner on the deal all right, the padre says.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Besides,&rdquo; argues the padre, &ldquo;it is onneces-sary for pore blinded mortals
- to come pawin&rsquo; about to protect a saint. These yere images,&rdquo; he insists,
- &ldquo;can look after themse&rsquo;fs. They&rsquo;ll find the way outen their troubles
- whenever they gets ready.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- At that we proceeds for&rsquo;ard to Casa Dolores an&rsquo; the promised Valley Tan,
- an&rsquo; leaves the wooden saint to his meditations on the grass. After all, I
- agrees with the padre. It&rsquo;s the saint&rsquo;s business to ride herd on the
- interests of the Plaza Chaparita; an&rsquo; if he goes to sleep on the lookout&rsquo;s
- stool an&rsquo; takes to neglectin&rsquo; sech plays as them sheep gettin&rsquo; sick,
- whatever is the Greasers goin&rsquo; to do? They&rsquo;re shore bound to express their
- disapproval; an&rsquo; I reckons as good a scheme as any is to caper up, yank
- the careless image outen his niche with a lariat, an&rsquo; lam loose an&rsquo; cavil
- at him with a club.
- </p>
- <p>
- This yere <i>fieste</i> at the Plaza Chaparita is a day an&rsquo; night of
- laughter, dance an&rsquo; mirth. But it ends bad. The padre an&rsquo; me is over to
- the dance-hall followin&rsquo; our investigations touchin&rsquo; the Valley Tan an&rsquo;
- the padre explains to me how he permits to his people a different behavior
- from what&rsquo;s possible among Americanos.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I studies for the church in Baltimore,&rdquo; the padre says, &ldquo;an&rsquo; thar the
- priest must keep a curb on his Americano parishioners. They are not like
- Mexicanos. They&rsquo;re fierce an&rsquo; headlong an&rsquo; go too far. If you let them
- gamble, they gamble too much; if you let them drink, they drink too much.
- The evil of the Americano is that he overplays. It is not so with the
- Mexicano. If the Mexicano gambles, it is only a trifle an&rsquo; for pleasure;
- if he drinks, it is but enough to free a bird&rsquo;s song in his heart. All my
- people drink an&rsquo; dance an&rsquo; gamble; but it&rsquo;s only play, it is never
- earnest. See! in the whole Plaza Chaparita you find no drunkard, no
- pauper; no one is too bad or too good or too rich or too poor or too
- unhappy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then the priest beams on me like he disposes of the question; an&rsquo; since
- I&rsquo;ve jest been drinkin&rsquo; his Valley Tan I don&rsquo;t enter no protests to what
- he states. From what ensoos, however, I should jedge the padre overlooks
- his game in one partic&rsquo;lar.
- </p>
- <p>
- As me an&rsquo; the padre sits gazin&rsquo; on at the dance, a senorita with a dark
- shawl over her head, drifts into the door like a shadow. She&rsquo;s little; an&rsquo;
- by what I sees of her face, she&rsquo;s pretty. As she crosses in front of the
- padre she stops an&rsquo; sort o&rsquo; drops down on one knee with her head bowed.
- The padre blesses her an&rsquo; calls her &ldquo;Chiquita;&rdquo; then she goes on. I don&rsquo;t
- pay no onusual attention; though as me an&rsquo; the padre talks, I notes her
- where she stands with her shawl still over her head in a corner of the
- dance hall.
- </p>
- <p>
- Across from the little Chiquita is a young Greaser an&rsquo; his sweetheart.
- This girl is pretty, too; but her shawl ain&rsquo;t over her head an&rsquo; she an&rsquo;
- her <i>muchacho</i>, from their smiles an&rsquo; love glances, is havin&rsquo; the
- happiest of nights.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It looks like you&rsquo;ll have a weddin&rsquo; on your hands,&rdquo; I says to the padre,
- indicatin&rsquo; where the two is courtin&rsquo;.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Chiquita should not stay here,&rdquo; says the padre talkin&rsquo; to himse&rsquo;f. With
- that he organizes like he&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; over to the little shawled senorita in
- the corner.
- </p>
- <p>
- It strikes me that the padre&rsquo;s remark is a heap irrelevant. But I soon
- sees that he onderstands the topics he tackles a mighty sight better than
- me. The padre&rsquo;s hardly moved when it looks like the senorita Chiquita
- saveys he&rsquo;s out to head her off. With that she crosses the dance-hall
- swift as a cat an&rsquo; flashes a knife into the heart of the laughing girl.
- The next moment the knife is planted in her own.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the old story, so old an&rsquo; common thar&rsquo;s not a new word to be said.
- Two dead girls; love the reason an&rsquo; the jealous knife the trail. Thar&rsquo;s
- not a scream, not a word; that entire <i>baile</i> stands transfixed. As
- the padre raises the little Chi-quita&rsquo;s head, I sees the tears swimmin&rsquo; in
- his eyes. It&rsquo;s the one time I comes nearest thinkin&rsquo; well of a Mexican;
- that padre, at least, is toler&rsquo;ble.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That is a very sad finale&mdash;the death of the girls,&rdquo; observed the
- Sour Gentleman, reaching for the Scotch whiskey as though for comfort&rsquo;s
- sake. &ldquo;And still, the glimpse you gave would move me to a pleasant
- estimate of Mexicans.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why then,&rdquo; returned the Old Cattleman, becoming also an applicant for
- Scotch, &ldquo;considered as abstract prop&rsquo;sitions, Mexicans aint so bad. Which
- they&rsquo;re like Injuns; they improves a lot by distance. An&rsquo; they has their
- strong p&rsquo;ints, too; gratitoode is one. You-all confer a favor on a
- Mexican, an&rsquo; he&rsquo;ll hang on your trail a hundred years but what he&rsquo;ll do
- you a favor in return. An&rsquo; he&rsquo;ll jest about pay ten for one at that.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Speakin&rsquo; of gratitoode, Sioux Sam yere tells a story to &rsquo;llustrate
- how good deeds is bound to meet their reward. It&rsquo;s what the squaws tells
- the papooses to make &rsquo;em kind.&rdquo; Then to Sioux Sam: &ldquo;Give us the
- tale of Strongarm an&rsquo; the Big Medicine Elk. The talk is up to you.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Sioux Sam was in no sort diffident, and readily told us the following:
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0010" id="link2HCH0010"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER X.&mdash;HOW STRONGARM WAS AN ELK.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">M</span>oh-Kwa was the
- wisest of all the beasts along the Upper Yellowstone; an&rsquo; yet Moh-Kwa
- could not catch a fish. This made Moh-Kwa have a bad heart, for next to
- honey he liked fish. What made it worse was that in Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s cavern where
- he lived, there lay a deep pool which was the camp of many fish; an&rsquo;
- Moh-Kwa would sit an&rsquo; look at them an&rsquo; long for them, while the fish came
- close to the edge an&rsquo; laughed at Moh-Kwa, for they knew beneath their
- scales that he could not catch them; an&rsquo; the laughter of the fish made a
- noise like swift water running among rocks. Sometimes Moh-Kwa struck at a
- fish with his big paw, but the fish never failed to dive out of reach; an&rsquo;
- this made the other fish laugh at Moh-Kwa more than before. Once Moh-Kwa
- got so angry he plunged into the pool to hunt the fish; but it only made
- him seem foolish, for the fish swam about him in flashing circles, an&rsquo;
- dived under him an&rsquo; jumped over him, laughing all the time, making a play
- an&rsquo; a sport of Moh-Kwa. At last he gave up an&rsquo; swam ashore; an&rsquo; then he
- had to sit by his fire an&rsquo; comb his fur all day to dry himself so that he
- might feel like the same bear again.
- </p>
- <p>
- One morning down by the Yellowstone, Moh-Kwa met Strongarm, the young
- Sioux, an&rsquo; Strongarm had a buffalo fish which he had speared in the river.
- An&rsquo; because Moh-Kwa looked at the fish hungrily an&rsquo; with water in his
- mouth, Strongarm gave him the buffalo fish. Also he asked Moh-Kwa why he
- did not catch fish since he liked them so well an&rsquo; the pool in his cavern
- was the camp of many fish. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa said it was because the fish were
- cowards an&rsquo; would not stay an&rsquo; fight with him, but ran away.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;They are not so brave as the bees,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;for when I find a
- bee-tree, they make me fight for the honey. The bees have big hearts
- though little knives, but the fish have no hearts an&rsquo; run like water down
- hill if they but see Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s shadow from his fire fall across the pool.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Strongarm said he would catch the fish for Moh-Kwa; an&rsquo; with that he went
- to the Wise Bear&rsquo;s house an&rsquo; with his spear took many fish, being plenty
- to feed Moh-Kwa two days. Moh-Kwa was very thankful, an&rsquo; because
- Strong-arm liked the Wise Bear, he came four times each moon an&rsquo; speared
- fish for Moh-Kwa who was never so well fed with fish before.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strongarm was a mighty hunter among the Sioux an&rsquo; killed more elk than did
- the ten best hunters of his village. So many elk did Strong-arm slay that
- his squaw, the Blossom, made for their little son, Feather-foot, a
- buckskin coat on which was sewed the eye-teeth of elk, two for each elk,
- until there were so many eye-teeth on Feather-foot&rsquo;s buckskin coat it was
- like counting the leaves on a cottonwood to find how many there were. An&rsquo;
- the Blossom was proud of Feather-foot&rsquo;s coat, for none among the Sioux had
- so beautiful a garment an&rsquo; the eye-teeth of the elk told how big a hunter
- was Strongarm.
- </p>
- <p>
- While the Sioux wondered an&rsquo; admired at the elk-tooth coat, it made the
- Big Medicine Elk, who was chief of the Elk people, hot an&rsquo; angry, an&rsquo;
- turned his heart black against Strongarm. The Big Medicine Elk said he
- would have revenge.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus it happened one day that when Strong-arm stepped from his lodge, he
- saw standing in front a great Elk who had antlers like the branches of a
- tree. An&rsquo; the great Elk stamped his foot an&rsquo; snorted at Strongarm. Then
- Strongarm took his bow an&rsquo; his lance an&rsquo; his knife an&rsquo; hunted the great
- Elk to kill him; but the great Elk ran always a little ahead just out of
- reach.
- </p>
- <p>
- At last the great Elk ran into the Pouch canyon an&rsquo; then Strongarm took
- hope into his heart like a man takes air into his mouth, for the sides of
- the Pouch canyon were high an&rsquo; steep an&rsquo; it ended with a high wall, an&rsquo;
- nothing save a bird might get out again once it went in; for the Pouch
- canyon was a trap which the Great Spirit had set when the world was new.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strongarm was happy in his breast as he followed the great Elk into the
- Pouch canyon for now he was sure. An&rsquo; he thought how the big eye-teeth of
- so great an Elk would look on the collar of Feather-foot&rsquo;s buckskin coat.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Strongarm came to the upper end of the Pouch canyon, there the great
- Elk stood waiting.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Hold!&rdquo; said the great Elk, when Strongarm put an arrow on his bowstring.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0009" id="linkimage-0009"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0157.jpg" alt="0157 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0157.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- But Strongarm shot the arrow which bounded off the great Elk&rsquo;s hide an&rsquo;
- made no wound. Then Strongarm ran against the great Elk with his lance,
- but the lance was broken as though the great Elk was a rock. Then
- Strongarm drew his knife, but when he went close to the great Elk, the
- beast threw him down with his antlers an&rsquo; put his forefoot on Strongarm
- an&rsquo; held him on the ground.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Listen,&rdquo; said the great Elk, an&rsquo; Strongarm listened because he couldn&rsquo;t
- help it. &ldquo;You have hunted my people far an&rsquo; near; an&rsquo; you can never get
- enough of their blood or their eye-teeth. I am the Big Medicine Elk an&rsquo;
- chief of the Elk people; an&rsquo; now for a vengeance against you, I shall
- change you from the hunter to the hunted, an&rsquo; you shall know how good it
- is to have fear an&rsquo; be an elk.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As the great Elk said this, Strongarm felt his head turn heavy with
- antlers, while his nose grew long an&rsquo; his mouth wide, an&rsquo; hair grew out of
- his skin like grass in the moon of new grass, an&rsquo; his hands an&rsquo; feet split
- into hoofs; an&rsquo; then Strong-arm stood on his four new hoofs an&rsquo; saw by his
- picture in the stream that he was an elk. Also the elk-fear curled up in
- his heart to keep him ever in alarm; an&rsquo; he snuffed the air an&rsquo; walked
- about timidly where before he was Strongarm and feared nothing.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strongarm crept home to his lodge, but the Blossom did not know her
- husband; an&rsquo; Feather-foot, his little son, shot arrows at him; an&rsquo; as he
- ran from them, the hunters of his village came forth an&rsquo; chased him until
- Strongarm ran into the darkness of the next night as it came trailing up
- from the East, an&rsquo; the darkness was kind an&rsquo; covered him like a blanket
- an&rsquo; Strongarm was hid by it an&rsquo; saved.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Strongarm did not come with the next sun to spear fish for Moh-Kwa,
- the Wise Bear went to Strongarm&rsquo;s lodge to seek him for he thought that he
- was sick. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa asked the Blossom where was Strongarm? An&rsquo; the
- Blossom said she did not know; that Strongarm chased the great Elk into
- the Pouch canyon an&rsquo; never came out again; an&rsquo; now a big Doubt had spread
- its blankets in her heart an&rsquo; would not leave, but was making a long camp,
- saying she was a widow. Then the Blossom wept; but Moh-Kwa told her to
- wait an&rsquo; he would see, because he, Moh-Kwa, owed Strongarm for many fish
- an&rsquo; would now pay him.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa went to the Big Medicine Elk.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Where is the Strongarm?&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He runs in the hills an&rsquo; is an elk,&rdquo; said the Big Medicine Elk. &ldquo;He
- killed my people for their teeth, an&rsquo; a great fright was on all my people
- because of the Strongarm. The mothers dare not go down to the river&rsquo;s edge
- to drink, an&rsquo; their children had no time to grow fat for they were ever
- looking to meet the Strongarm. Now he is an elk an&rsquo; my people will have
- peace; the mothers will drink an&rsquo; their babies be fat an&rsquo; big, being no
- more chased by the Strongarm.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Moh-Kwa thought an&rsquo; thought, an&rsquo; at last he said to the Big Medicine
- Elk:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That is all proud talk. But I must have the Strongarm back, for he
- catches my fish.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But the Big Medicine Elk said he would not give Moh-Kwa back the
- Strongarm.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why should I?&rdquo; asked the Big Medicine Elk. &ldquo;Did not I save you in the
- Yellowstone,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;when as you swam the river a drifting tree
- caught in your antlers an&rsquo; held down your head to drown you? An&rsquo; did you
- not bawl to me who searched for berries on the bank; an&rsquo; did I not swim to
- you an&rsquo; save you from the tree?&rdquo; Still the Big Medicine Elk shook his
- antlers.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What you say is of another day. You saved me an&rsquo; that is ended. I will
- not give you back the Strongarm for that. One does not drink the water
- that is gone by.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa then grew so angry his eyes burned red like fire, an&rsquo; he
- threatened to kill the Big-Medicine Elk. But the Big Medicine Elk laughed
- like the fish laughed, for he said he could not be killed by any who lived
- on the land.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Then we will go to the water,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa; an&rsquo; with that he took the
- Big Medicine Elk in his great hairy arms an&rsquo; carried him kicking an&rsquo;
- struggling to the Yellowstone; for Moh-Kwa could hold the Big Medicine Elk
- though he could not hurt him.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa had carried the Big Medicine Elk to the river, he sat down on
- the bank an&rsquo; waited with the Big Medicine Elk in his arms until a tree
- came floating down. Then Moh-Kwa swam with the Big Medicine Elk to the
- tree an&rsquo; tangled the branches in the antlers of the Big Medicine Elk so
- that he was fast with his nose under the water an&rsquo; was sure to drown.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now you are as you were when I helped you,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa.
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; the Catfish people in the river came with joy an&rsquo; bit the legs of the
- Big Medicine Elk, an&rsquo; said, &ldquo;Thank you, Moh-Kwa; you do well to bring us
- food now an&rsquo; then since you eat so many fish.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As Moh-Kwa turned to swim again to the bank, he said over his shoulder to
- the Big Medicine Elk:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now you may sing your death song, for Pauguk, the Death, is in the river
- with you an&rsquo; those are Pauguk&rsquo;s catfish which gnaw your legs.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- At this the Big Medicine Elk said between his cries of grief an&rsquo; fear that
- if Moh-Kwa would save him out of the river, he would tell him how to have
- the Strongarm back. So Moh-Kwa went again an&rsquo; freed the Big Medicine Elk
- from the tree an&rsquo; carried him to the bank, while the Catfish people
- followed, angrily crying:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Is this fair, Moh-Kwa? Do you give an&rsquo; then do you take away? Moh-Kwa!
- you are a Pawnee!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Big Medicine Elk had got his breath an&rsquo; wiped the tears from his
- eyes, he told Moh-Kwa that the only way to bring the Strongarm back to be
- a hunter from being one of the hunted was for Feather-foot, his son, to
- cut his throat; an&rsquo; for the Blossom, his squaw, to burn his elk-body with
- cedar boughs.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; why his son, the Feather-foot?&rdquo; asked Moh-Kwa.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Because the Feather-foot owes the Strongarm a life,&rdquo; replied the Big
- Medicine Elk. &ldquo;Is not Strongarm the Feather-foot&rsquo;s father an&rsquo; does not the
- son owe the father his life?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa saw this was true talk, so he let the Big Medicine Elk go free.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I will even promise that the Strongarm,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, as the two parted,
- &ldquo;when again he is a Sioux on two legs, shall never hunt the Elk people.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But the Big Medicine Elk, who was licking his fetlocks where the Catfish
- people had hurt the skin, shook his antlers an&rsquo; replied:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is not needed. The Strongarm has been one of the Elk people an&rsquo; will
- feel he is their brother an&rsquo; will not hurt them.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa found it a hard task to capture Strongarm when now he was an elk
- with the elk-fear in his heart. For Strongarm had already learned the
- elk&rsquo;s warning which is taught by all the Elk people, an&rsquo; which says:
- </p>
- <p>
- <br />
- </p>
- <p class="indent15">
- Look up for danger and look down for gain;
- </p>
- <p class="indent15">
- Believe no wolf&rsquo;s word, and avoid the plain.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br />
- </p>
- <p>
- Strongarm would look down for the grass with one eye, while he kept an eye
- up among the branches or along the sides of the canyon for fear of
- mountain lions. An&rsquo; he stuck close in among the hills, an&rsquo; would not go
- out on the plains where the wolves lived; an&rsquo; he wouldn&rsquo;t talk with a wolf
- or listen to his words.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Strongarm, while he ran an&rsquo; hid from Moh-Kwa and the others, was not
- afraid of the Blossom, who was his squaw, but would come to her gladly if
- he might find her alone among the trees.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is not the first time,&rdquo; said the Wise Bear, &ldquo;that the hunter has made
- his trap of love.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- With that he told the Blossom to go into the hills an&rsquo; call Strongarm to
- her with her love. Then she was to bind his feet so that he might not get
- away an&rsquo; run.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Blossom called Strongarm an&rsquo; he came; but he was fearful an&rsquo;
- suspicious an&rsquo; his nose an&rsquo; his ears an&rsquo; his eyes kept guard until the
- Blossom put her hand on his neck; an&rsquo; then Strongarm&rsquo;s great love for the
- Blossom smothered out his caution as one might smother a fire with a robe;
- an&rsquo; the Blossom tied all his feet with thongs an&rsquo; bound his eyes with her
- blanket so that Strongarm might not see an&rsquo; be afraid.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then came Feather-foot, gladly, an&rsquo; cut Strong-arm&rsquo;s throat with his
- knife; for Feather-foot did not know he killed his father&mdash;for that
- was a secret thing with Moh-Kwa an&rsquo; the Blossom&mdash;an&rsquo; thought only how
- he killed a great Elk.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Strongarm was dead, Moh-Kwa toiled throughout the day carrying up the
- big cedar; an&rsquo; when a pile like a hill was made, Moh-Kwa put Strongarm&rsquo;s
- elk-body on its top, an&rsquo; brought fire from his house in the rocks, an&rsquo;
- made a great burning.
- </p>
- <p>
- In the morning, the Blossom who had stayed with Moh-Kwa through the night
- while the fire burned, said, &ldquo;Now, although the big elk is gone into
- ashes, I do not yet see the Strongarm.&rdquo; But Moh-Kwa said, &ldquo;You will find
- him asleep in the lodge.&rdquo; An&rsquo; that was a true word, for when Moh-Kwa an&rsquo;
- the Blossom went to the lodge, there they found Strongarm whole an&rsquo; good
- an&rsquo; as sound asleep as a tree at midnight.
- </p>
- <p>
- Outside the lodge they met the little Feather-foot who cried, &ldquo;Where is
- the big elk, Moh-Kwa, that I killed?&rdquo; An&rsquo; the Blossom showed him his
- father, Strongarm, where he slept, an&rsquo; said, &ldquo;There is your big elk,
- Feather-foot; an&rsquo; this will ever be your best hunting for it found you
- your father again.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa saw that everything was settled an&rsquo; well, an&rsquo; that he would
- now have always his regular fish, he wiped the sweat out of his eyes with
- his paws which were all singed fur an&rsquo; ashes, an&rsquo; said, &ldquo;I am the weariest
- bear along the whole length of the Yellowstone, for I carried some heavy
- trees an&rsquo; have worked hard. Now I will sleep an&rsquo; rest.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; with that Moh-Kwa lay down an&rsquo; snored an&rsquo; slept four days; then he
- arose an&rsquo; eat up the countless fish which Strongarm had speared to be
- ready for him. This done, Moh-Kwa lighted his pipe of kinnikinick, an&rsquo;
- softly rubbing his stomach where the fish were, said: &ldquo;Fish give Moh-Kwa a
- good heart.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now that is what I call a pretty story,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is that,&rdquo; observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, with emphasis. &ldquo;And I&rsquo;ve
- no doubt the Strongarm made it a point thereafter to be careful as to what
- game he hunted. But, leaving fable for fact, my friend,&rdquo;&mdash;the Red
- Nosed Gentleman addressed now the Sour Gentleman&mdash;&ldquo;would you not call
- it your turn to uplift the spirits of this company? We have just enough
- time and I just enough burgundy for one more story before we go to bed.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;While our friend, the Sioux Gentleman,&rdquo; responded the Sour Gentleman,
- &ldquo;was unfolding his interesting fable, my thoughts&mdash;albeit I listened
- to him and lost never a word&mdash;were to the rear with the old days
- which came on the back of that catastrophe of tobacco. They come to me
- most clearly as I sit here smoking and listening, and with your permission
- I&rsquo;ll relate the story of The Smuggled Silk.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0011" id="link2HCH0011"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XI.&mdash;THAT SMUGGLED SILK.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">S</span>hould your
- curiosity invite it, and the more since I promised you the story, we will
- now, my friends, go about the telling of that one operation in underground
- silk. It is not calculated to foster the pride of an old man to plunge
- into a relation of dubious doings of his youth. And yet, as I look
- backward on that one bit of smuggling of which I was guilty, so far as
- motive was involved, I exonerate myself. I looked on the government,
- because of the South&rsquo;s conquest by the North, and that later ruin of
- myself through the machinations of the Revenue office, as both a political
- and a personal foe. And I felt, not alone morally free, but was impelled
- besides in what I deemed a spirit of justice to myself, to wage war
- against it as best I might. It was on such argument, where the chance
- proffered, that I sought wealth as a smuggler. I would deplete the
- government&mdash;forage, as it were, on the enemy&mdash;thereby to fatten
- my purse.
- </p>
- <p>
- As my hair has whitened with the sifting frosts of years, I confess that
- my sophistries of smuggling seem less and less plausible, while smuggling
- itself loses whatever of romantic glamour it may once have been invested
- with, or what little color of respect to which it might seem able to lay
- claim. This tale shall be told in simplest periods. That is as should be;
- for expression should ever be meek and subjugated when one&rsquo;s story is the
- mere story of a cheat. There is scant room in such recital for heroic
- phrase. Smuggling, and paint it with what genius one may, can be nothing
- save a skulking, hiding, fear-eaten trade. There is nothing about it of
- bravery or dash. How therefore and avoid laughter, may one wax stately in
- any telling of its ignoble details?
- </p>
- <p>
- When, following my unfortunate crash in tobacco, I had cleared away the
- last fragment of the confusion that reigned in my affairs, I was driven to
- give my nerves a respite and seek a rest. For three months I had been
- under severest stress. When the funeral was done&mdash;for funeral it
- seemed to me&mdash;and my tobacco enterprise and those hopes it had so
- flattered were forever laid at rest, my soul sank exhausted and my brain
- was in a whirl. I could neither think with clearness nor plan with
- accuracy. Moreover, I was prey to that depression and lack of confidence
- in myself, which come inevitably as the corollary of utter weariness.
- </p>
- <p>
- Aware of this personal condition, I put aside thought of any present
- formulation of a future. I would rest, recover poise, and win back that
- optimism that belongs with health and youth.
- </p>
- <p>
- This was wisdom; I was jaded beyond belief; and fatigue means dejection,
- and dejection spells pessimism, and pessimism is never sagacious nor
- excellent in any of its programmes.
- </p>
- <p>
- For that rawness of the nerves I speak of, many apply themselves to drink;
- some rush to drugs; for myself, I take to music. It was midwinter, and
- grand opera was here. This was fortunate. I buried myself in a box, and
- opened my very pores to those nerve-healthful harmonies.
- </p>
- <p>
- In a week thereafter I might call myself recovered. My soul was cool, my
- eye bright, my mind clear and sensibly elate. Life and its promises seemed
- mightily refreshed.
- </p>
- <p>
- No one has ever called me superstitious and yet to begin my
- course-charting for a new career, I harked back to the old Astor House. It
- was there that brilliant thought of tobacco overtook me two years before.
- Perhaps an inspiration was to dwell in an environment. Again I registered,
- and finding it tenantless, took over again my old room. Still I cannot
- say, and it is to that hostelry&rsquo;s credit, that my domicile at the Astor
- aided me to my smuggling resolves. Those last had growth somewhat in this
- fashion:
- </p>
- <p>
- I had dawdled for two hours over coffee in the café&mdash;the room and the
- employment which had one-time brought me fortune&mdash;but was incapable
- of any thought of value. I could decide on nothing good. Indeed, I did
- naught save mentally curse those revenue miscreants who, failing of
- blackmail, had destroyed me for revenge.
- </p>
- <p>
- Whatever comfort may lurk in curses, at least they carry no money profit;
- so after a fruitless session over coffee and maledictions, I arose, and as
- a calmative, walked down Broadway.
- </p>
- <p>
- At Trinity churchyard, the gates being open, I turned in and began
- ramblingly to twine and twist among the graves. There I encountered a
- garrulous old man who, for his own pleasure, evidently, devoted himself to
- my information. He pointed out the grave of Fulton, he of the steamboats;
- then I was shown the tomb of that Lawrence who would &ldquo;never give up the
- ship;&rdquo; from there I was carried to the last low bed of the love-wrecked
- Charlotte Temple.
- </p>
- <p>
- My eye at last, by the alluring voice and finger of the old guide, was
- drawn to a spot under the tower where sleeps the Lady Cornbury, dead now
- as I tell this, hardby two hundred years. Also I was told of that Lord
- Cornbury, her husband, once governor of the colony for his relative, Queen
- Anne; and how he became so much more efficient as a smuggler and a customs
- cheat, than ever he was as an executive, that he lost his high employ.
- </p>
- <p>
- Because I had nothing more worthy to occupy my leisure, I listened&mdash;somewhat
- listlessly, I promise you, for after all I was thinking on the future, not
- the past, and considering of the living rather than those old dead folk,
- obscure, forgotten in their slim graves&mdash;I listened, I say, to my
- gray historian; and somehow, after I was free of him, the one thing that
- remained alive in my memory was the smuggling story of our Viscount
- Cornbury.
- </p>
- <p>
- Among those few acquaintances I formed during my brief prosperity, was one
- with a gentleman named Harris, who owned apartments under mine on
- Twenty-second Street. Harris was elegant, educated, traveled, and
- apparently well-to-do of riches. Busy with my own mounting fortunes, the
- questions of who Harris was? and what he did? and how he lived? never
- rapped at the door of my curiosity for reply.
- </p>
- <p>
- One night, however, as we sat over a late and by no means a first bottle
- of wine, Harris himself informed me that he was employed in smuggling; had
- a partner-accomplice in the Customs House, and perfect arrangements aboard
- a certain ship. By these last double advantages, he came aboard with
- twenty trunks, if he so pleased, without risking anything from the
- inquisitiveness or loquacity of the officers of the ship; and later
- debarked at New York with the certainty of going scatheless through the
- customs as rapidly as his Inspector partner could chalk scrawlingly &ldquo;O.
- K.&rdquo; upon his sundry pieces of baggage.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coming from Old Trinity, still mooting Corn-bury and his smugglings, my
- thoughts turned to Harris. Also, for the earliest time, I began to
- consider within myself whether smuggling was not a field of business
- wherein a pushing man might grow and reap a harvest. The idea came to me
- to turn &ldquo;free-trader.&rdquo; The government had destroyed me; I would make
- reprisal. I would give my hand to smuggling and spoil the Egyptian.
- </p>
- <p>
- At once I sought Harris and over a glass of champagne&mdash;ever a
- favorite wine with me&mdash;we struck agreement. As a finale we each put
- in fifteen thousand dollars, and with the whole sum of thirty thousand
- dollars Harris pushed forth for Europe while I remained behind. Harris
- visited Lyons; and our complete investment was in a choicest sort of Lyons
- silk. The rich fabrics were packed in a dozen trunks&mdash;not all alike,
- those trunks, but differing, one from another, so as to prevent the notion
- as they stood about the wharf that there was aught of relationship between
- them or that one man stood owner of them all.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is not needed to tell of my partner&rsquo;s voyage of return. It was without
- event and one may safely abandon it, leaving its relation to Harris
- himself, if he be yet alive and should the spirit him so move. It is
- enough for the present purpose that in due time the trunks holding our
- precious silk-bolts, with Harris as their convoy, arrived safe in New
- York.
- </p>
- <p>
- I had been looking for the boat&rsquo;s coming and was waiting on the wharf as
- her lines and her stagings were run ashore.
- </p>
- <p>
- Our partner, the Inspector, and who was to enjoy a per cent, of the
- profits of the speculation, was named Lorns. He rapidly chalked &ldquo;O. K.&rdquo;
- with his name affixed to the end of each several trunk and it thereupon
- with the balance of inspected baggage was promptly piled upon the wharf.
- </p>
- <p>
- There had been a demand for drays, I remember, and on this day when our
- silks came in, I was able to procure but one. The ship did not dock until
- late in the afternoon, and at eight o&rsquo;clock of a dark, foggy April
- evening, there still remained one of our trunks&mdash;the largest of all,
- it was&mdash;on the wharf. The dray had departed with the second load for
- that concealing loft in Reade Street which, during Harris&rsquo; absence, I had
- taken to be used as the depot of those smuggling operations wherein we
- might become engaged. I had made every move with caution; I had never
- employed our real names not even with the drayman.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I tell you, the dray was engaged about the second trip. This last large
- silk-trunk was left behind perforce; pile it how one might there had been
- no safe room for it on the already overloaded dray. The drayman promised
- to return and have it safely in our loft that night.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myself, I was from first to last lounging about the wharf, overseeing
- the going away of our goods. Harris, so soon as I gave him key and
- street-number, had posted to Reade Street to attend the silk&rsquo;s reception.
- </p>
- <p>
- Waiting for the coming back of the conveying dray proved but a slow, dull
- business, and I was impatiently, at the hour I&rsquo;ve named, walking up and
- down, casting an occasional glance at the big last trunk where it stood on
- end, a bit drawn out and separated from the common mountain of baggage
- wherewith the wharf was piled.
- </p>
- <p>
- One of the general inspectors, a man I had never seen but whom I knew, by
- virtue of his rank, to be superior to our chalk-wielding coparcener, also
- paced the wharf and appeared to bear me company in a distant,
- non-communicative way. This customs captain and myself, save for an under
- inspector named Quin, had the dock to ourselves. The boat was long in and
- most land folk had gotten through their concern with her and wended
- homeward long before. There were, however, many passengers of emigrant
- sort still held aboard the ship.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I marched up and down, Lorns came ashore and pretended some business
- with his superior officer. As he returned to the ship and what duties he
- had still to perform there, he made a slight signal to both myself and his
- fellow inspector, Quin, to follow him. I was well known to Lorns, having
- had several talks with him, while Harris was abroad. Quin I had never met;
- but it quickly appeared that he was a confidant of Lorns, and while
- without money interest in our affairs was ready to bear helping hand
- should the situation commence to pinch.
- </p>
- <p>
- Quin and I went severally and withal carelessly aboard ship, and not at
- all as though we were seeking Lorns. This was to darken the chief, whom we
- both surmised to be the cause of Lorn&rsquo;s signal.
- </p>
- <p>
- Once aboard and gathered in a dark corner, Lorns began at once:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Let me do the talking,&rdquo; said Lorns with a nervous rapidity that at once
- enlisted the ears of Quin and myself. &ldquo;Don&rsquo;t interrupt, but listen. The
- chief suspects that last trunk. I can tell it by the way he acts. A bit
- later, when I come ashore, he&rsquo;ll ask to have it opened. Should he do so,
- we&rsquo;re lost; you and I.&rdquo; This last was to me. Then to Quin: &ldquo;Do you see
- that long, bony Swiss, with the boots and porcelain pipe? He&rsquo;s in an ugly
- mood, doesn&rsquo;t speak English, and within one minute after you return to the
- wharf, he and I will be entangled in a rough and tumble riot. I&rsquo;ll attend
- to that. The row will be prodigious. The chief will be sent for to settle
- the war, and when he leaves the wharf, Quin, don&rsquo;t wait; seize on that
- silk trunk and throw it into the river. There&rsquo;s iron enough clamped about
- the corners to sink it; besides, it&rsquo;s packed so tightly it&rsquo;s as heavy as
- lead, and will go to the bottom like an anvil. Then from the pile pull
- down some trunk similar to it in looks and stand it in its place. It&rsquo;ll go
- in the dark. Give the new trunk my mark, as the chief has already read the
- name on the trunk. Go, Quin; I rely on you.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You can trust me, my boy,&rdquo; retorted Quin, cheerfully, and turning on his
- heel, he was back on the wharf in a moment, and apparently busy about the
- pile of baggage.
- </p>
- <p>
- Suddenly there came a mighty uproar aboard ship. Lorns and the Swiss, the
- latter already irate over some trouble he had experienced, were rolling
- about the deck in a most violent scrimmage, the Swiss having decidedly the
- worst of the trouble. The chief rushed up the plank; Lorns and the
- descendant of Tell and Winkelried, were torn apart; and then a double din
- of explanation ensued. After ten minutes, the chief was able to straighten
- out the difficulty&mdash;whatever its pretended cause might be I know not;
- for I held myself warily aloof, not a little alarmed by what Lorns had
- communicated&mdash;and repaired again to his station upon the wharf.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the chief came down the plank, Quin, who had not been a moment behind
- him in going aboard to discover the reasons of the riot, followed. Brief
- as was that moment, however, during which Quin had lingered behind, he had
- made the shift suggested by Lorns; the silk trunk was under the river, a
- strange trunk stood in its stead.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the chief returned, he walked straight to this suspected trunk and
- tipped it down with his foot. Then to Quin:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Ask Lorns to step <i>here</i>.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Quin went questing Lorns; shortly Lorns and Quin came back together. The
- chief turned in a brisk, sharp, official way to Lorns:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Did you inspect this trunk?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I did,&rdquo; said Lorns, looking at the chalk marks as if to make sure.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Open it!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- No keys were procurable; the owners, Lorns said, had long since left the
- docks. But Lorns suggested that he get hammer and cold-chisel from the
- ship.
- </p>
- <p>
- The trunk was opened and found free and innocent of aught contraband. The
- chief wore a puzzled, dark look; he felt that he&rsquo;d been cheated, but he
- couldn&rsquo;t say how. Therefore, being wise, the chief gulped, said nothing,
- and as life is short and he had many things to do, soon after left the
- docks and went his way.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That was a squeak!&rdquo; said Lorns when we were at last free of the dangerous
- chief. &ldquo;Quin, I thank you.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s all right,&rdquo; retorted Quin, with a grin; &ldquo;do as much for me some
- time.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That night, with the aid of a river pirate, our trunk, jettisoned by the
- excellent Quin, was fished up; and being tight as a drum, its contents had
- come to little harm with the baptism. At last, our dozen silk trunks&mdash;holding
- a treasure of thirty thousand dollars and whereon we looked to clear a
- heavy profit&mdash;were safe in the Reade Street loft; and my hasty heart,
- which had been beating at double speed since that almost fatal
- interference, slowed to normal.
- </p>
- <p>
- One might now suppose our woes were at an end, all danger over, and
- nothing to do but dispose of that shimmering cargo to best advantage.
- Harris and I were of that spirit-lifting view; we began on the very next
- day to feel about for customers.
- </p>
- <p>
- Harris, whose former smuggling exploits had dealt solely with gems, knew
- as little of silk as did I. Had either been expert he might have foreseen
- a coming peril into whose arms we in our blindness all but walked. No, our
- troubles were not yet done. We had escaped the engulfing suck of
- Charybdis, only to be darted upon by those six grim mouths of her sister
- monster, Scylla, over the way.
- </p>
- <p>
- Well do I recall that morning. I had seen but two possible purchasers of
- silks when Harris overtook me. His eye shone with alarm. Lorns had run him
- down with the news&mdash;however he himself discovered it, I never knew&mdash;that
- another danger yawned.
- </p>
- <p>
- Harris hurried me to our Reade Street lair and gave particulars.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It seems,&rdquo; said Harris, quite out of breath with the speed we&rsquo;d made in
- hunting cover, &ldquo;that Stewart is for America the sole agent of these
- particular brands of silk which we&rsquo;ve brought in. Some one to whom we&rsquo;ve
- offered them has notified the Stewart company. At this moment and as we
- sit here, the detectives belonging to Stewart, and for all I may guess,
- the whole Central Office as well, are on our track. They want to discover
- who has these silks; and how they came in, since the customs records show
- no such importations. And there&rsquo;s a dark characteristic to these silks.
- Each bolt has its peculiar, individual selvage. Each, with a sample of its
- selvage, is registered at the home looms. Could anyone get a snip of a
- selvage he could return with it to Lyons, learn from the manufacturers&rsquo;
- book just when it was woven, when sold, and to whom. I can tell you one
- thing,&rdquo; observed Harris, as he concluded his story, &ldquo;we&rsquo;re in a bad
- corner.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- How the cold drops spangled my brows! I began to wish with much heart that
- I&rsquo;d never met Harris, nor heard, that Trinity churchyard day, of Cornbury
- and his smuggling methods of gathering gold.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was one ray of hope; neither Harris nor I had disclosed our names,
- nor the whereabouts or quantity of the silks; and as each had been dealing
- with folk with whom he&rsquo;d never before met, we were both as yet mysteries
- unsolved.
- </p>
- <p>
- Nor were we ever solved. Harris and I kept off the streets during daylight
- hours for a full month. We were not utterly idle; we unpleasantly employed
- ourselves in trimming away that telltale selvage.
- </p>
- <p>
- Preferring safety to profit, we put forth no efforts to realize on our
- speculations for almost a year. By that time the one day&rsquo;s wonder of
- &ldquo;Who&rsquo;s got Stewart&rsquo;s silks?&rdquo; had ceased to disturb the mercantile world
- and the grand procession of dry goods interest passed on and over it.
- </p>
- <p>
- At last we crept forth like felons&mdash;as, good sooth! we were&mdash;and
- disposed of our mutilated silks to certain good folk whose forefathers
- once ruled Palestine. These gentry liked bargains, and were in no wise
- curious; they bought our wares without lifting an eyebrow of inquiry, and
- from them constructed&mdash;though with that I had no concern&mdash;those
- long &ldquo;circulars,&rdquo; so called, which were the feminine joy a third of a
- century gone.
- </p>
- <p>
- As to Harris and myself; what with delays, what with expenses, what with
- figures reduced to dispose of our plunder, we got evenly out. We got back
- our money; but for those fear-shaken hours of two separate perils, we were
- never paid.
- </p>
- <p>
- I smuggled no more. Still, I did not relinquish my pious purpose to
- despoil that public treasury Egyptian quoted heretofore. Neither did I
- give up the Customs as a rich field of illicit endeavor. But my methods
- changed. I now decided that I, myself, would become an Inspector, like
- unto the useful Lorns, and make my fortune from the opulent inside. I
- procured the coveted appointment, for I could bring power to bear, and
- later I&rsquo;ll tell you of The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- When I was in my room that night, making ready for bed, I could still hear
- the soft, cold fingers of the snow upon the pane. What a storm was that!
- Our landlord who had been boy and man and was now gray in that old inn,
- declared how he had never witnessed the smothering fellow to it.
- </p>
- <p>
- The following day, while still and bright and no snow to fall, showed a
- temperature below zero. The white blockade still held us fast, and now the
- desperate cold was come to be the ally of the snow. Departure was never a
- question.
- </p>
- <p>
- As we kicked the logs into a cheerful uproar of sparks, and drew that
- evening about the great fireplace, it was the Old Cattleman to break
- conversational ground.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Do you-all know,&rdquo; said he, &ldquo;I shore feels that idle this evenin&rsquo; it&rsquo;s
- worse&rsquo;n scand&rsquo;lous&mdash;it&rsquo;s reedic&rsquo;lous.&rdquo; Here he threw himself back in
- his armchair and yawned. &ldquo;Pardon these yere demonstrations of weariness,
- gents,&rdquo; he observed; &ldquo;they ain&rsquo;t aimed at you none. That&rsquo;s the fact,
- though; this amazin&rsquo; sensation of bein&rsquo; held a prisoner is beginnin&rsquo; to
- gnaw at me a heap. Talk of &lsquo;a painted ship upon a painted ocean,&rsquo; like
- that poem sharp wrote of! Why that vessel&rsquo;s sedyoolously employed compared
- to us!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You should recall,&rdquo; remarked the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;how somewhere it is said
- that whatever your hand finds to do, you should do it with all your heart.
- Now, I would say the counsel applies to our present position. Since we
- must needs be idle, let us be idle heartily and happily, and get every
- good to lie hidden in what to me, at least, is a most pleasant
- companionship.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I shore unites with you,&rdquo; responded the Old Cattleman, &ldquo;in them
- script&rsquo;ral exhortations to do things with all your heart. It was Wild Bill
- Hickox&rsquo;s way, too; an&rsquo; a Christian adherence to that commandment, not only
- saves Bill&rsquo;s life, but endows him with the record for single-handed
- killin&rsquo;s so far as we-all has accounts.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Is it a story?&rdquo; asked the Red Nosed Gentleman. &ldquo;Once in a while I relish
- a good blood and thunder tale.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s this a-way,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;Bill&rsquo;s hand is forced by the
- Jake McCandlas gang. Bill has &rsquo;em to do; an&rsquo; rememberin&rsquo;,
- doubtless, the Bible lessons of his old mother back in Illinois, he shore
- does &rsquo;em with all his heart, as the good book says. This yere is
- the story of &lsquo;The Wiping Out of McCandlas.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0012" id="link2HCH0012"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XII.&mdash;THE WIPING OUT OF McCANDLAS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>ell you-all a tale
- of blood? It shore irritates me a heap, gents, when you eastern folks
- looks allers to the west for stories red an&rsquo; drippin&rsquo; with murder. Which
- mighty likely now the west is plenty peaceful compared with this yere east
- itse&rsquo;f. Thar&rsquo;s one thing you can put in your mem&rsquo;randum book for footure
- ref&rsquo;rence, an&rsquo; that is, for all them years I inhabits Arizona an&rsquo; Texas
- an&rsquo; sim&rsquo;lar energetic localities, I never trembles for my life, an&rsquo; goes
- about plumb furtive, expectin&rsquo; every moment is goin&rsquo; to be my next that
- a-way, ontil I finds myse&rsquo;f camped on the sunrise side of the Alleghenies.
- </p>
- <p>
- Nacherally, I admits, thar has been a modicum of blood shed west an&rsquo; some
- slight share tharof can be charged to Arizona. No, I can&rsquo;t say I deplores
- these killin&rsquo;s none. Every gent has got to die. For one, I&rsquo;m mighty glad
- the game&rsquo;s been rigged that a-way. I&rsquo;d shore hesitate a lot to be born
- onless I was shore I&rsquo;d up an&rsquo; some day cash in. Live forever? No, don&rsquo;t
- confer on me no sech gloomy outlook. If a angel was to appear in our midst
- an&rsquo; saw off on me the news that I was to go on an&rsquo; on as I be now, livin&rsquo;
- forever like that Wanderin&rsquo; Jew, the information would stop my clock right
- thar. I&rsquo;d drop dead in my moccasins.
- </p>
- <p>
- It don&rsquo;t make much difference, when you gives yourse&rsquo;f to a ca&rsquo;m
- consid&rsquo;ration of the question as to when you dies or how you dies. The
- important thing is to die as becomes a gent of sperit who has nothin&rsquo; to
- regret. Every one soon or late comes to his trail&rsquo;s end. Life is like a
- faro game. One gent has ten dollars, another a hundred, another a
- thousand, and still others has rolls big enough to choke a cow. But
- whether a gent is weak or strong, poor or rich, it&rsquo;s written in advance
- that he&rsquo;s doomed to go broke final. He&rsquo;s doomed to die. Tharfore, when
- that&rsquo;s settled, of what moment is it whether he goes broke in an hour, or
- pikes along for a week&mdash;dies to-day or postpones his funeral for
- years an&rsquo; mebby decades?
- </p>
- <p>
- Holdin&rsquo; to these yere views, you can see without my tellin&rsquo; that a
- killin&rsquo;, once it be over, ain&rsquo;t likely to harass me much. Like the rest of
- you-all, I&rsquo;ve been trailin&rsquo; out after my grave ever since I was foaled&mdash;on
- a hunt for my sepulcher, you may say&mdash;an&rsquo; it ought not to shock me to
- a showdown jest because some pard tracks up ag&rsquo;inst his last restin&rsquo;
- place, spreads his blankets an&rsquo; goes into final camp before it come my own
- turn.
- </p>
- <p>
- But, speakin&rsquo; of killin&rsquo;s, the most onusual I ever hears of is when Wild
- Bill Hickox cleans up the Jake McCandlas gang. This Bill I knows intimate;
- he&rsquo;s not so locoed as his name might lead a gent to concloode. The truth
- is, he&rsquo;s a mighty crafty, careful form of sport; an&rsquo; he never pulled a gun
- ontil he knew what for an&rsquo; never onhooked it ontil he knew what at.
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; speakin&rsquo; of the latter&mdash;the onhookin&rsquo; part&mdash;that Wild Bill
- never missed. That&rsquo;s his one gift; he&rsquo;s born to make a center shot
- whenever his six-shooter expresses itse&rsquo;f.
- </p>
- <p>
- This McCandlas time is doorin&rsquo; them border troubles between Missouri an&rsquo;
- Kansas. Jest prior tharunto, Bill gets the ill-will of the Missouri outfit
- by some gun play he makes at Independence, then the eastern end of the old
- Santa Fe trail. What Bill accomplishes at Independence is a heap effectual
- an&rsquo; does him proud. But it don&rsquo;t endear him none to the Missouri heart.
- Moreover, it starts a passel of resentful zealots to lookin&rsquo; for him a
- heap f&rsquo;rocious, an&rsquo; so he pulls his freight.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s mebby six months later when Bill is holdin&rsquo; down a stage station
- some&rsquo;eres over in Kansas&mdash;it&rsquo;s about a day&rsquo;s ride at a road-gait from
- Independence&mdash;for Ben Holiday&rsquo;s overland line. Thar&rsquo;s the widow of a
- <i>compadre</i> of Bill who has a wickeyup about a mile away, an&rsquo; one day
- Bill gets on his hoss, Black Nell, an&rsquo; goes romancin&rsquo; over to see how the
- widow&rsquo;s gettin&rsquo; on. This Black Nell hoss of Bill&rsquo;s is some cel&rsquo;brated.
- Black Nell is tame as a kitten an&rsquo; saveys more&rsquo;n a hired man. She&rsquo;d climb
- a pa&rsquo;r of steps an&rsquo; come sa&rsquo;n-terin&rsquo; into a dance hall or a hurdy gurdy if
- Bill calls to her, an&rsquo; I makes no doubt she&rsquo;d a-took off her own saddle
- an&rsquo; bridle an&rsquo; gone to bed with a pa&rsquo;r of blankets, same as folks, if Bill
- said it was the proper antic for a pony.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s afternoon when Bill rides up to pow-wow with this relict of his pard.
- As he comes into the one room&mdash;for said wickeyup ain&rsquo;t palatial, an&rsquo;
- consists of one big room, that a-way, an&rsquo; a jim-crow leanto&mdash;Bill
- says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Howdy, Jule?&rdquo; like that.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Howdy, Bill?&rdquo; says the widow. &ldquo;&rsquo;Light an&rsquo; rest your hat, while I
- roam &rsquo;round an&rsquo; rustle some chuck.&rdquo; This widow has the right idee.
- </p>
- <p>
- While Bill is camped down on a stool waitin&rsquo; for the promised <i>carne</i>
- an&rsquo; flap-jacks, or whatever may be the grub his hostess is aimin&rsquo; to
- on-loose, he casts a glance outen the window. He&rsquo;s interested at once. Off
- across the plains he discerns the killer, McCandlas an&rsquo; his band p&rsquo;intin&rsquo;
- straight for the widow&rsquo;s. They&rsquo;re from Missouri; thar&rsquo;s &rsquo;leven of
- &rsquo;em, corral count, an&rsquo; all &ldquo;bad.&rdquo; As they can see his mare, Black
- Nell, standin&rsquo; in front of the widow&rsquo;s, Bill argues jestly that the
- McCandlas outfit knows he&rsquo;s thar; an&rsquo; from the speed they&rsquo;re makin&rsquo; in
- their approach, he likewise dedooces that they&rsquo;re a heap eager for his
- company.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill don&rsquo;t have to study none to tell that thar&rsquo;s somebody goin&rsquo; to get
- action. It&rsquo;s likely to be mighty onequal, but thar&rsquo;s no he&rsquo;p; an&rsquo; so Bill
- pulls his gun-belt tighter, an&rsquo; organizes to go as far as he can. He has
- with him only one six-shooter; that&rsquo;s a severe setback. Now, if he was
- packin&rsquo; two the approaching war jig would have carried feachers of
- comfort. But he&rsquo;s got a nine-inch bowie, which is some relief. When his
- six-shooter&rsquo;s empty, he can fall back on the knife, die hard, an&rsquo; leave
- his mark.
- </p>
- <p>
- As Bill rolls the cylinder of his gun to see if she&rsquo;s workin&rsquo; free, an&rsquo;
- loosens the bowie to avoid delays, his eye falls on a rifle hangin&rsquo; above
- the door.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Is it loaded, Jule?&rdquo; asks Bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Loaded to the gyards,&rdquo; says the widow.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; that ain&rsquo;t no fool of a piece of news, neither,&rdquo; says Bill, as he
- reaches down the rifle. &ldquo;Now, Jule, you-all better stampede into the
- cellar a whole lot ontil further orders. Thar&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to be heated times
- &rsquo;round yere an&rsquo; you&rsquo;d run the resk of gettin&rsquo; scorched.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;d sooner stay an&rsquo; see, Bill,&rdquo; says the widow. &ldquo;You-all knows how eager
- an&rsquo; full of cur&rsquo;osity a lady is,&rdquo; an&rsquo; here the widow beams on Bill an&rsquo;
- simpers coaxin&rsquo;ly.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; I&rsquo;d shore say stay, Jule,&rdquo; says Bill, &ldquo;if you could turn a trick. But
- you sees yourse&rsquo;f, you couldn&rsquo;t. An&rsquo; you&rsquo;d be in the way.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Thar&rsquo;s a big burrow out in the yard; what Kansas people deenominates as a
- cyclone cellar. It&rsquo;s like a cave; every se&rsquo;f-respectin&rsquo; Kansas fam&rsquo;ly has
- one. They may not own no bank account; they may not own no good repoote;
- but you can gamble, they&rsquo;ve got a cyclone cave.
- </p>
- <p>
- Shore, it ain&rsquo;t for ornament, nor yet for ostentation. Thar&rsquo;s allers a
- breeze blowin&rsquo; plenty stiff across the plains. Commonly, it&rsquo;s strenyous
- enough to pick up a empty bar&rsquo;l an&rsquo; hold it ag&rsquo;inst the side of a buildin&rsquo;
- for a week. Sech is the usual zephyr. Folks don&rsquo;t heed them none. But now
- an&rsquo; then one of these yere cyclones jumps a gent&rsquo;s camp, an&rsquo; then it&rsquo;s
- time to make for cover. Thar&rsquo;s nothin&rsquo; to be said back to a cyclone. It&rsquo;ll
- take the water outen a well, or the money outen your pocket, or the ha&rsquo;r
- off your head; it&rsquo;ll get away with everything about you incloodin&rsquo; your
- address. Your one chance is a cyclone cellar; an&rsquo; even that refooge ain&rsquo;t
- no shore-thing, for I knowed a cyclone once that simply feels down an&rsquo;
- pulls a badger outen his hole. Still, sech as the last, is onfrequent.
- </p>
- <p>
- The widow accepts Bill&rsquo;s advice an&rsquo; makes for the storm cave. This leaves
- Bill happy an&rsquo; easy in his mind, for it gives him plenty of room an&rsquo;
- nothin&rsquo; to think of but himse&rsquo;f. An&rsquo; Bill shore admires a good fight.
- </p>
- <p>
- He don&rsquo;t have long to wait after the widow stampedes. Bill hears the sweep
- of the &rsquo;leven McCandlas hosses as they come chargin&rsquo; up. No, he
- can&rsquo;t see; he ain&rsquo;t quite that weak-minded as to be lookin&rsquo; out the
- window.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the band halts, Bill hears McCandlas say:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Shore, gents; that&rsquo;s Wild Bill&rsquo;s hoss. We&rsquo;ve got him treed an&rsquo; out on a
- limb; to-morry evenin&rsquo; we&rsquo;ll put that long-ha&rsquo;red skelp of his in a
- showcase in Independence.&rdquo; Then McCandlas gives a whoop, an&rsquo; bluffs Bill
- to come out. &ldquo;Come out yere, Bill; we needs you to decide a bet,&rdquo; yells
- McCandlas. &ldquo;Come out; thar&rsquo;s no good skulkin&rsquo;.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Say, Jake,&rdquo; retorts Bill; &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll gamble that you an&rsquo; your hoss thieves
- ain&rsquo;t got the sand to come after me. Come at once if you comes; I despises
- delays, an&rsquo; besides I&rsquo;ve got to be through with you-all an&rsquo; back to the
- stage station by dark.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll put you where thar ain&rsquo;t no stage lines, Bill, long before dark,&rdquo;
- says McCandlas. An&rsquo; with that he comes caperin&rsquo; through the window, sash,
- glass, an&rsquo; the entire lay-out, as blithe as May an&rsquo; a gun in each hand.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill cuts loose the Hawkins as he&rsquo;s anxious to get the big gun off his
- mind. It stops McCandlas, &ldquo;squar&rsquo; in the door,&rdquo; as they says in monte;
- only it&rsquo;s the window. McCandlas falls dead outside.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; I&rsquo;m sorry for that, too,&rdquo; says Bill to him-se&rsquo;f. &ldquo;I&rsquo;m preemature some
- about that shot. I oughter let Jake come in. Then I could have got his
- guns.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- When McCandlas goes down, the ten others charges with a whoop. They comes
- roarin&rsquo; through every window; they breaks in the door; they descends on
- Bill&rsquo;s fortress like a &rsquo;possum on a partridge nest!
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; then ensoos the busiest season which any gent ever cuts in upon. The
- air is heavy with bullets an&rsquo; thick with smoke. The walls of the room
- later looks like a colander.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s a mighty fav&rsquo;rable fight, an&rsquo; Bill don&rsquo;t suffer none in his repoote
- that Kansas afternoon. Faster than you can count, his gun barks; an&rsquo; each
- time thar&rsquo;s a warrior less. One, two, three, four, five, six; they p&rsquo;ints
- out after McCandlas an&rsquo; not a half second between &rsquo;em as they
- starts. It was good luck an&rsquo; good shootin&rsquo; in combination.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the limit; six dead to a single Colt&rsquo;s! No gent ever approaches it
- but once; an&rsquo; that&rsquo;s a locoed sharp named Metzger in Raton. He starts in
- with Moulton who&rsquo;s the alcade, an&rsquo; beefs five an&rsquo; creases another; an&rsquo; all
- to the same one gun. The public, before he can reload, hangs Metzger to
- the sign in front of the First National Bank, so he don&rsquo;t have much time
- to enjoy himse&rsquo;f reviewin&rsquo; said feats.
- </p>
- <p>
- Rifle an&rsquo; six-shooter empty; seven dead an&rsquo; done, an&rsquo; four to take his
- knife an&rsquo; talk it over with! That&rsquo;s the situation when Bill pulls his
- bowie an&rsquo; starts to finish up.
- </p>
- <p>
- It shore ain&rsquo;t boy&rsquo;s play; the quintette who&rsquo;s still prancin&rsquo; about the
- field is as bitter a combination as you&rsquo;d meet in a long day&rsquo;s ride. Their
- guns is empty, too; an&rsquo; they, like Bill, down to the steel. An&rsquo; thar&rsquo;s
- reason to believe that the fight from this p&rsquo;int on is even more
- interestin&rsquo; than the part that&rsquo;s gone before. Thar&rsquo;s no haltin&rsquo; or hangin&rsquo;
- back; thar ain&rsquo;t a bashful gent in the herd. They goes to the center like
- one man.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill, who&rsquo;s as quick an&rsquo; strong as a mountain lion, with forty times the
- heart an&rsquo; fire, grips one McCandlas party by the wrist. Thar&rsquo;s a twist an&rsquo;
- a wrench an&rsquo; Bill onj&rsquo;ints his arm.
- </p>
- <p>
- That&rsquo;s the last of the battle Bill remembers. All is whirl an&rsquo; smoke an&rsquo;
- curse an&rsquo; stagger an&rsquo; cut an&rsquo; stab after that, with tables crashin&rsquo; an&rsquo;
- the wreck an&rsquo; jangle of glass.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the end comes. Whether the struggle from the moment when it&rsquo;s got down
- to the bowies lasts two minutes or twenty, Bill never can say. When it&rsquo;s
- over, Bill finds himse&rsquo;f still on his feet, an&rsquo; he&rsquo;s pushin&rsquo; the last gent
- off his blade. Split through the heart, this yere last sport falls to the
- floor in a dead heap, an&rsquo; Bill&rsquo;s alone, blood to both shoulders.
- </p>
- <p>
- Is Bill hurt? Gents, it ain&rsquo;t much likely he&rsquo;s put &rsquo;leven fightin&rsquo;
- men into the misty beyond, the final four with a knife, an&rsquo; him plumb
- scatheless! No, Bill&rsquo;s slashed so he wouldn&rsquo;t hold hay; an&rsquo; thar&rsquo;s more
- bullets in his frame than thar&rsquo;s pease in a pod. The Doc who is called in,
- an&rsquo; who prospects Bill, allers allowed that it&rsquo;s the mistake of his life
- he don&rsquo;t locate Bill an&rsquo; work him for a lead mine.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the battle is over an&rsquo; peace resoomes its sway, Bill begins to
- stagger. An&rsquo; he&rsquo;s preyed on by thirst. Bill steadies himse&rsquo;f along the
- wall; an&rsquo; weak an&rsquo; half blind from the fogs of fightin&rsquo;, he feels his way
- out o&rsquo; doors.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thar&rsquo;s a tub of rain-water onder the eaves; it&rsquo;s the only thing Bill&rsquo;s
- thinkin&rsquo; of at the last. He bends down to drink; an&rsquo; with that, faints an&rsquo;
- falls with his head in the tub.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the widow who rescoos Bill; she emerges outen her cyclone cellar an&rsquo;
- saves Bill from drownin&rsquo;. An&rsquo; he lives, too; lives to be downed years
- afterward when up at Deadwood a timid party who don&rsquo;t dare come &rsquo;round
- in front, drills Bill from the r&rsquo;ar. But what can you look for? Folks who
- lives by the sword will perish by the sword as the scripters sets forth,
- an&rsquo; I reckons now them warnin&rsquo;s likewise covers guns.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And did that really happen?&rdquo; asked the Red Nosed Gentleman, drawing a
- deep breath.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s as troo as that burgundy you&rsquo;re absorbin&rsquo;,&rdquo; replied the Old
- Cattleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I can well believe it,&rdquo; observed the Sour Gentleman; &ldquo;a strong hour makes
- a strong man. Did this Wild Bill Hickox wed the widow who pulled him out
- of the tub?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which I don&rsquo;t think so,&rdquo; returned the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;If he does, Bill
- keeps them nuptials a secret. But it&rsquo;s a cinch he don&rsquo;t. As I says at the
- jump, Bill is a mighty wary citizen an&rsquo; not likely to go walkin&rsquo; into no
- sech ambuscade as a widow.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You do not think, then,&rdquo; observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, &ldquo;that a wife
- would be a blessing?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;She wouldn&rsquo;t be to Wild Bill Hickox,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;Thar is
- gents who ought never to wed, an&rsquo; Bill&rsquo;s one. He was bound to be killed
- final; the game law was out on Bill for years. Now when a gent is shore to
- cash in that a-way, why should he go roundin&rsquo; up a wife? Thar oughter be a
- act of congress ag&rsquo;in it, an&rsquo; I onderstand that some sech measure is to be
- introdooced.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Passing laws,&rdquo; remarked the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;is no such easy matter, now,
- as passing the bottle.&rdquo; Here the Jolly Doctor looked meaningly at the Red
- Nosed Gentleman, who thereupon shoved the burgundy into the Jolly Doctor&rsquo;s
- hand with all conceivable alacrity. Like every good drinker, the Red Nosed
- Gentleman loved a cup companion. &ldquo;There was a western person,&rdquo; went on the
- Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;named Jim Britt, who came east to have a certain law
- passed; he didn&rsquo;t find it flowers to his feet.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What now was the deetails?&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;The doin&rsquo;s an&rsquo;
- plottin&rsquo;s an&rsquo; doubleplays of them law-makin&rsquo; mavericks in congress is
- allers a heap thrillin&rsquo; to me.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Very well,&rdquo; responded the Jolly Doctor; &ldquo;let each light a fresh cigar,
- for it&rsquo;s rather a long story, and when all are comfortable, I&rsquo;ll give you
- the history of &lsquo;How Jim Britt Passed His Bill.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0013" id="link2HCH0013"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XIII.&mdash;HOW JIM BRITT PASSED HIS BILL.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">L</span>ast Chance was a
- hamlet in southeastern Kansas. Last Chance, though fervid, was not large.
- Indeed, a cowboy in a spirit of insult born of a bicker with the town
- marshal had said he could throw the loop of his lariat about Last Chance
- and drag it from the map with his pony. However, this was hyperbole.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt was not the least conspicuous among the men of Last Chance.
- Withal, Jim Britt was much diffused throughout the commerce of that
- village and claimed interests in a dozen local establishments, from a
- lumber yard to a hotel. Spare of frame, and of an anxious predatory nose,
- was Jim Britt; and his gray eyes ever roving for a next investment; and
- the more novel the enterprise, the more leniently did Jim Britt regard it.
- The new had for him a fascination, since he was in way and heart an
- Alexander and hungered covetously for further worlds to conquer. Thus it
- befell that Jim Britt came naturally to his desire to build a railway when
- the exigencies of his affairs opened gate to the suggestion.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt became the proprietor of a lead mine&mdash;or was it zinc?&mdash;in
- southeastern Missouri, and no mighty distance from his own abode of Last
- Chance. The mine was somewhat thrust upon Jim Britt by Fate, since he
- accepted it for a bad debt. It was &ldquo;lead mine or nothing,&rdquo; and Jim Britt,
- whose instincts, like Nature, abhorred a vacuum, took the mine. It was a
- good mine, but a drawback lurked in the location; it lay over the Ozark
- Hills and far away from any nearest whistle of a railroad.
- </p>
- <p>
- This isolation taught Jim Britt the thought of connecting his mine by rail
- with Last Chance; the latter was an easiest nearest point, and the route
- offered a most accommodating grade. A straight line, or as the crow is
- said to fly but doesn&rsquo;t, would make the length of the proposed improvement
- fifty miles. When done, it would serve not only Jim Britt&rsquo;s mine, but
- admirably as a feeder for the Fort Scot and Gulf; and Jim Britt foresaw
- riches in that. Altogether, the notion was none such desperate scheme.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was a side serious, however, which must be considered. The line
- would cross the extreme northeast angle of the Indian Territory, or as it
- is styled in those far regions, the &ldquo;Nation,&rdquo; and for this invasion of
- redskin holdings the consent of the general government, through its
- Congress assembled, must be secured.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt; far from being depressed, said he would go to Washington and
- get it; he rather reveled in the notion. Samantha, his wife, shook her
- head doubtfully.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Jim Britt,&rdquo; said Samantha, severely, &ldquo;you ain&rsquo;t been east since Mr.
- Lincoln was shot. You know no more of Washington than a wolf. I&rsquo;d give
- that railroad up; and especially, I&rsquo;d keep away from Congress. Don&rsquo;t try
- to braid that mule&rsquo;s tail&rdquo;&mdash;Samantha was lapsing into the metaphor
- common of Last Chance&mdash;&ldquo;don&rsquo;t try to braid that mule&rsquo;s tail. It&rsquo;ll
- kick you plumb out o&rsquo; the stall.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But Jim Britt was firm; the mule simile in no sort abated him.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0010" id="linkimage-0010"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0199.jpg" alt="0199 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0199.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But what could you do with Congress?&rdquo; persisted Samantha; &ldquo;you, a
- stranger and alone?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt argued that one determined individual could do much; energy
- wisely employed would overcome mere numbers. He cited the ferocious
- instance of a dim relative of his own, a vivacious person yclept Turner,
- who because of injuries fancied or real, hung for years about the tribal
- flanks of the Comanches and potted their leading citizens. This the
- vigorous Turner kept up until he had corralled sixty Comanche top-nots;
- and the end was not yet when the Comanches themselves appealed to their
- agent for protection. They said they couldn&rsquo;t assemble for a green corn
- dance, or about a regalement of baked dog, without the Winchester of the
- unauthorized Turner barking from some convenient hill; the squaws would
- then have nothing left but to wail the death song of some eminent spirit
- thus sifted from their midst. When they rode to the hill in hunt of
- Turner, he would be miles away on his pony, and adding to his safety with
- every jump. The Comanches were much disgusted, and demanded the agent&rsquo;s
- interference.
- </p>
- <p>
- Upon this mournful showing, Turner was brought in and told to desist; and
- as a full complement of threats, which included among their features a
- trial at Fort Smith and a gibbet, went with the request, Turner was in the
- end prevailed on to let his Winchester sleep in its rack, and thereafter
- the Comanches danced and devoured dog unscared. The sullen Turner said the
- Comanches had slain his parent long ago; the agent expressed regrets, but
- stuck for it that even with such an impetus a normal vengeance should have
- run itself out with the conquest of those sixty scalps.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt told this story of Turner to Samantha; and then he argued that
- as the Comanches were made to feel a one-man power by the industrious
- Turner, so would he, Jim Britt, for all he stood alone, compel Congress to
- his demands. He would take that right of way across the Indian Territory
- from between their very teeth. He was an American citizen and Congress was
- his servant; in this wise spake Jim Britt.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s all right,&rdquo; argued the pessimistic Samantha; &ldquo;that&rsquo;s all right
- about your drunken Turner; but he had a Winchester. Now you ain&rsquo;t goin&rsquo; to
- tackle Congress with no gun, Jim Britt.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Despite the gloomy prophecies of Samantha, whom Jim Britt looked on as a
- kind of Cassandra without having heard of Cassandra, our would-be railroad
- builder wound up the threads and loose ends of his Last Chance businesses,
- and having, as he described it, &ldquo;fixed things so they would run themselves
- for a month,&rdquo; struck out for Washington. Jim Britt carried twenty-five
- hundred dollars in his pocket, confidence in his heart, and Samantha&rsquo;s
- forebode of darkling failure in his ears.
- </p>
- <p>
- While no fop and never setting up to be the local Brummel, Jim Britt&rsquo;s
- clothes theretofore had matched both his hour and environment, and held
- their decent own in the van of Last Chance fashion. But the farther Jim
- Britt penetrated to the eastward in his native land, the more his raiment
- seemed to fall behind the age; and at the last, when he was fairly within
- the gates of Washington, he began to feel exceeding wild and strange.
- Also, it affected him somewhat to discover himself almost alone as a
- tobacco chewer, and that a great art preserved in its fullness by Last
- Chance had fallen to decay along the Atlantic. These, however, were
- questions of minor moment, and save that his rococo garb drove the
- sensitive Jim Britt into cheap lodgings in Four-and-one-half Street,
- instead of one of the capital&rsquo;s gilded hotels, they owned no effect.
- </p>
- <p>
- This last is set forth in defence against an imputation of parsimony on
- the side of Jim Britt. He was one who spent his money like a king whenever
- and wherever his education or experience pointed the way. It was his
- clothes of a remote period to make him shy, else Jim Britt would have
- shrunk not from the Raleigh itself, but climbed and clambered and browsed
- among the timberline prices of its grill-room, as safe and satisfied as
- ever browsed mountain goat on the high levels of its upland home. Yea,
- forsooth! Jim Britt, like a sailor ashore, could spend his money with a
- free and happy hand.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt, acting on a hint offered of his sensibilities, for a first step
- reclothed himself from a high-priced shop; following these improvements,
- save for the fact that he appalled the eye as a trifle gorgeous, he might
- not have disturbed the sacred taste of Connecticut Avenue itself. In
- short, in the matter of garb, Jim Britt, while audible, was down to date.
- </p>
- <p>
- With the confidence born of his new clothes&mdash;for clothes in some
- respects may make the man&mdash;Jim Britt sate him down to study Congress.
- He deemed it a citadel to be stormed; not lacking in military genius he
- began to look it over for a weak point.
- </p>
- <p>
- These adventures of Jim Britt now about a record, occurred, you should
- understand, almost a decade ago. In that day there should have been
- eighty-eight senators and three hundred and fifty-six representatives,
- albeit, by reason of death or failure to elect, a not-to-be-noticed
- handful of seats were vacant.
- </p>
- <p>
- By an industrious perusal of the Congressional directory, wherein the
- skeleton of each House was laid out and told in all its divers committee
- small-bones, Jim Britt began to understand a few of the lions in his path.
- For his confusion he found that Congress was sub-divided into full sixty
- committees, beginning with such giant conventions as the Ways and Means,
- Appropriations, Military, Naval, Coinage, Weights and Measures, Banking
- and Currency, Indian, Public Lands, Postal, and Pensions, and dwindling
- down to ignoble riffraff&mdash;which owned each a chairman, a committee
- room, a full complement of clerks and messengers, and an existence, but
- never convened&mdash;like the Committee on Acoustics and Ventliation, and
- Alcoholic Liquor Traffic.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt learned also of the Sergeants at Arms of Senate and House, and
- how these dignitaries controlled the money for those bodies and paid the
- members their salaries. Incidentally, and by way of gossip, he was told of
- that House Sergeant who had levanted with the riches entrusted to his
- hands, and left the broken membership, gnashing its teeth in poverty and
- impotent gloom, unable to draw pay.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then, too, there was a Document Room where the bills and resolutions were
- kept when printed. Also, about each of the five doors of House and Senate,
- when those sacred gatherings were in session, there were situated a host
- of messengers, carried for twelve hundred dollars a year each on the
- Doorkeeper&rsquo;s rolls. It was the duty and pleasure of these myrmidons to
- bring forth members into the corridors, to the end that they be refreshed
- with a word of counsel from constituents who had traveled thither for that
- purpose; and in the finish to lend said constituents money to return home.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt, following these first connings of the directory, went
- personally to the capitol, and from the galleries, leaning his chin on the
- rail the while, gazed earnestly on greatness about the transaction of its
- fame. These studies and personally conducted tours, and those
- conversations to be their incident which came off between Jim Britt and
- chance-blown folk who fell across his pathway, enlarged Jim Britt&rsquo;s store
- of information in sundry fashions. He discovered that full ten thousand
- bills and resolutions were introduced each Congress; that by virtue of a
- mere narrowness of time not more than five per cent, of this storm of
- business could be dealt with, the other ninety-five, whether for good or
- ill, being starved to death for lack of occasion. The days themselves were
- no longer than five working hours since Congress convened at noon.
- </p>
- <p>
- The great radical difference between House and Senate loomed upon Jim
- Britt in a contrast of powers which abode with the presiding officers of
- those mills to grind new laws. The president of the Senate owned few or
- none. He might enforce Jefferson&rsquo;s rules for debates and call a
- recalcitrant senator to order, a call to which the recalcitrant paid
- little heed beyond tart remarks on his part concerning his own high
- determinations to yield to no gavel tyranny, coupled with a forceful
- though conceited assurance flung to the Senate at large, that he, the
- recalcitrant, knew his rights (which he never did), and would uphold them
- (which he never failed to do.) The Senate president named no committees;
- owned no control over the order of business; indeed he was limited to a
- vote on ties, a warning that he would clear the galleries (which was never
- done) when the public therein roosting, applauded, and the right to
- prevent two senators from talking at one and the same time. These marked
- the utmost measure of his influence. Any senator could get the floor for
- any purpose, and talk on any subject from Prester John to Sheep in the
- Seventeenth Century, while his strength stood. Also, and much as dogs have
- kennels permitted them for their habitation, the presiding officer of the
- Senate&mdash;in other words, the Vice-President of the nation&mdash;was
- given a room, separate and secluded to himself, into which he might creep
- when chagrin for his own unimportance should overmaster him or otherwise
- his woes become greater than he might publicly bear.
- </p>
- <p>
- The House Speaker was a vastly different cock, with a louder crow and
- longer spur. The Speaker was a king, indeed; and an absolute monarch or an
- autocrat or what you will that signifies one who may do as he chooses,
- exercise unbridled will, and generally sit beneath the broad shadows of
- the vine and the fig tree of his prerogatives with none to molest him or
- make him afraid. The Speaker was, so to phrase it, the entire House, the
- other three hundred and fifty-five members acting only when he consented
- or compelled them, and then usually by his suggestion and always under his
- thumb. No bill could be considered without the Speaker&rsquo;s permission; and
- then for so long only as he should allow, and by what members he
- preferred. No man could speak to a measure wanting the gracious consent of
- this dignitary; and no word could be uttered&mdash;at least persisted in&mdash;To
- which he felt distaste. The Speaker, when lengths and breadths are
- measured, was greater than the Moscow Czar and showed him a handless
- infant by comparison.
- </p>
- <p>
- As a half-glove of velvet for his iron hand, and to mask and soften his
- pure autocracy&mdash;which if seen naked might shock the spirit of
- Americanism&mdash;there existed a Rules Committee. This subbody, whereof
- the Speaker was chief, carried, besides himself, but two members; and
- these he personally selected, as indeed he did the entire membership of
- every committee on the House muster-rolls. This Rules Committee, with the
- Speaker in absolute sway, acted with reference to the House at large as do
- the Board of Judges for a racecourse. It declared each day what bills
- should be taken up, limited debate, and to pursue the Track simile to a
- last word, called on this race or cleared the course of that race, and
- fairly speaking dry-nursed the House throughout its travels, romps and
- lessons.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt discovered that in all, counting Speaker, Rules Committee, and a
- dozen chairmen of the great committees, there existed no more than fifteen
- folk who might by any stretch of veracity be said to have a least of voice
- in the transaction of House business. In the gagged and bound cases of the
- other three hundred and forty-one, and for what public good or ill to flow
- from them, their constituents would have fared as well had they, instead
- of electing these representatives, confined themselves to writing the
- government a letter setting forth their wants.
- </p>
- <p>
- In reference to his own bill, Jim Britt convinced himself of two imposing
- truths. Anybody would and could introduce it in either House or Senate or
- in both at once; then, when thus introduced and it had taken the routine
- course to the proper committee, the situation would ask the fervent
- agreement of a majority in each body, to say nothing of the Speaker&rsquo;s
- consent&mdash;a consent as hard to gain as a girl&rsquo;s&mdash;to bring it up
- for passage.
- </p>
- <p>
- Nor was there any security of concert. The bill might be fashionable, not
- to say popular, with one body, while the other turned rigid back upon it.
- It might live in the House to die in the Senate, or succeed in the Senate
- and perish in the House. There were no safety and little hope to be won in
- any corner, and the lone certainty to peer forth upon Jim Britt was that
- the chances stood immeasurably against him wherever he turned his eyes.
- The camel for the needle&rsquo;s eye and the rich man into heaven, were easy and
- feasible when laid side by side with the Congressional outlook for his
- bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- While Jim Britt was now sensibly cast down and pressed upon by despair,
- within him the eagerness for triumph grew taller with each day. For one
- daunting matter, should he return empty of hand, Samantha would wear the
- fact fresh and new upon her tongue&rsquo;s end to the last closing of his eyes.
- It would become a daily illustration&mdash;an hourly argument in her
- practiced mouth.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was one good to come to Jim Britt by his investigations and that was
- a good instruction. Like many another, Jim Britt, from the deceitful
- distance of Last Chance, had ever regarded both House and Senate as
- gigantic conspiracies. They were eaten of plot and permeated of intrigue;
- it was all chicane and surprise and sharp practice. Congress was a name
- for traps and gins and pits and snares and deadfalls. The word meant
- tunnels and trap-doors and vaults and dungeons and sinister black whatnot.
- Jim Britt never paused to consider wherefore Congress should, for ends
- either clean or foul, conceal within itself these midnight commodities of
- mask and dark-lantern, and go about its destiny a perennial Guy Fawkes,
- ready to explode a situation with a touch and blow itself and all
- concerned to far-spread flinders. Had he done so he might have dismissed
- these murky beliefs.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is, however, never too late to mend. It began now to dawn upon Jim
- Britt by the morning light of what he read and heard and witnessed, that
- both Houses in their plan and movement were as simple as a wire fence; no
- more recondite than is a pair of shears. They might be wrong, but they
- were not intricate; they might spoil a deal of cloth in their cutting, or
- grow dull of edge or loose of joint and so not cut at all, but they were
- not mysterious. Certainly, Congress was no more a conspiracy than is a
- flock of geese, and a brooding hen would be as guilty of a plot and as
- deep given to intrigue. Congress was a stone wall or a precipice or a
- bridgeless gulf or chloroform or what one would that was stupefying or
- difficult of passage to the border of the impossible, but there dwelt
- nothing occult or secret or unknowable in its bowels. These truths of
- simplicity Jim Britt began to learn and, while they did not cheer, at
- least they served to clear him up.
- </p>
- <p>
- Following two weeks of investigation, Jim Britt secured the introduction
- of his bill. This came off by asking; the representative from the Last
- Chance district performing in the one body, while one of the Kansas
- senators acted in the more venerable convention.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now when the bill was introduced, printed, and in the lap of the proper
- committee, Jim Britt went to work to secure the bill&rsquo;s report. He might as
- well have stormed the skies to steal a star; he found himself as helpless
- as a fly in amber.
- </p>
- <p>
- About this hour in his destinies, Jim Britt made a radical and, as it
- turned, a decisive move. He had now grown used to Washington and
- Washington to him, and while folk still stared and many grinned, Jim Britt
- did not receive that ovation as he moved about which marked and made
- unhappy his earlier days in the town. Believing it necessary to his bill&rsquo;s
- weal, Jim Britt began to haunt John Chamberlin&rsquo;s house of call as then
- was, and to scrape acquaintance with statesmen who passed hours of ease
- and wine in its parlors.
- </p>
- <p>
- In the commencement of his Chamberlin experiences Jim Britt met much to
- affright him. A snowy-bearded senator from Nevada sat at a table. On
- seeing Jim Britt smile upon him in a friendly way&mdash;he was hoping to
- make the senator&rsquo;s acquaintance&mdash;he of the snow-beard, apropos of
- nothing, suddenly thundered:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I have this day read John Sherman&rsquo;s defence of the Crime of &rsquo;Seventy-Three.
- John Sherman contends that no crime was committed because no criminals
- were caught.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- This outburst so dismayed Jim Britt that he sought a far corner and no
- more tempted the explosiveness of Snow-Beard.
- </p>
- <p>
- Again, Jim Britt would engage a venerable senator from Alabama in talk. He
- was instantly taken by the helpless button, and for a quintette of hours
- told of the national need of a Panama Canal, and given a list of what
- railroads in their venality set the flinty face of their opposition to its
- coming about.
- </p>
- <p>
- These things, the thunders of Snow-Beard and the exhaustive settings forth
- of the senator from the south, pierced Jim Britt; for he reflected that if
- the questions of silver and Panama could not be budged for their benefit
- by these gentlemen of beard and long experience and who dwelt well within
- the breastworks of legislation, then his bill for that small right of way,
- and none to aid it save himself in his poor obscurity, could hope for
- nothing except death and burial where it lay.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was a gentleman of Congress well known and loved as the Statesman
- from Tupelo. He was frequent and popular about Chamberlin&rsquo;s. The Statesman
- from Tupelo was a humorist of celebration and one of the redeeming
- features of the House of Representatives. His eye fell upon the queer,
- ungainly form of Jim Britt, with hungry face, eyes keen but guileless, and
- nose of falcon curve.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo beheld in Jim Britt with his Gothic simplicity a
- self-offered prey to the spear of every joker. The Statesman from Tupelo,
- with a specious suavity of accent and a blandness irresistible, drew forth
- Jim Britt in converse. The latter, flustered, flattered, went to extremes
- of confidence and laid frankly bare his railroad hopes and fears which
- were now all fears.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo listened with decorous albeit sympathetic
- gravity. When Jim Britt was done he spoke:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;As you say,&rdquo; observed the Statesman from Tupelo, &ldquo;your one chance is to
- get acquainted with a majority of both Houses and interest them personally
- in your bill.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But how might a party do that soonest?&rdquo; asked Jim Britt. &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t want to
- camp yere for the balance of my days. Besides, thar&rsquo;s Samantha.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Certainly, there&rsquo;s Samantha,&rdquo; assented the Statesman from Tupelo. Then
- following a pause:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I suppose the readiest method would be to give a dinner. Could you
- undertake that?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why, I reckon I could.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The dinner project obtained kindly foothold in the breast of Jim Britt; he
- had read of such banquet deeds as a boy when the papers told the splendors
- of Sam Ward and the Lucullian day of the old Pacific Mail. Jim Britt had
- had no experience of Chamberlin prices, since his purchases at that hotel
- had gone no farther a-field than a now-and-then cigar. He had for most
- part subsisted at those cheap restaurants which&mdash;for that there be
- many threadbare folk, spent with their vigils about Congress, hoping for
- their denied rights&mdash;are singularly abundant in Washington. These
- modest places of regale would give no good notion of Chamberlin&rsquo;s, but
- quite the contrary. Wherefore, Jim Britt, quick with railway ardor and to
- get back to the far-away Samantha, took the urgent initiative, and said he
- would order the dinner for what night the Statesman from Tupelo deemed
- best, if only that potent spirit would agree to gather in the guests.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;We will have the dinner, then,&rdquo; said He of Tupelo, &ldquo;on next Saturday. You
- can tell Chamberlin; and I&rsquo;ll see to the guests.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How many?&rdquo; said Chamberlin&rsquo;s steward, when he received the orders of Jim
- Britt.
- </p>
- <p>
- The coming railway magnate looked at the Statesman from Tupelo.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Say fifty,&rdquo; remarked the Statesman from Tupelo.
- </p>
- <p>
- Jim Britt was delighted. He would have liked sixty guests better, or if
- one might, one hundred; but fifty was a fair start. There could come other
- dinners, for the future holds a deal of room. In time Jim Britt might dine
- a full moiety of Congress. The dinner was fixed; the menu left to the
- steward&rsquo;s ingenuity and taste; and now when the situation was thus relaid,
- and Saturday distant but two days, Jim Britt himself called for an
- apartment at Chamberlin&rsquo;s, sent for his one trunk, and established himself
- on the scene of coming dinner action to have instant advantage of whatever
- offered that might be twisted to affect his lead-mine road.
- </p>
- <p>
- The long tables for Jim Britt&rsquo;s dinner were spread in a dining room
- upstairs. There were fifty covers, and room for twenty more should twenty
- come. The apartment itself was a jungle of tropical plants, and the ground
- plan of the feast laid on a scale of bill-threatening magnificence.
- </p>
- <p>
- This was but right. For when the steward would have consulted the exultant
- Jim Britt whose florid imaginings had quite carried him off his feet, that
- gentleman said simply:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Make the play with the bridle off! Don&rsquo;t pinch down for a chip.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Thereupon the steward cast aside restraint and wandered forth upon that
- dinner with a heart care-free and unrestrained. He would make of it a
- moment of terrapin and canvas-back and burgundy which time should date
- from and folk remember for long to the Chamberlin praise.
- </p>
- <p>
- Saturday arrived, and throughout the afternoon Jim Britt, by grace of the
- good steward, who had a pride of his work and loved applause, teetered in
- and out of the dining room and with dancing eye and mouth ajar gave rein
- to admiration. It would be a mighty dinner; it would land his bill in his
- successful hands, and make, besides, a story to amaze the folk of Last
- Chance to a standstill. These be not our words; rather they flowed as the
- advance jubilations of Jim Britt.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was one thought to bear upon Jim Britt to bashful disadvantage. The
- prospect of entertaining fifty statesmen shook his confidence and took his
- breath. To repair these disasters he called privily from time to time for
- whiskey.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was not over-long before he talked thickly his encomiums to the
- steward. On his last visit to survey that fairyland of a dining room, Jim
- Britt counted covers laid for several hundred guests; what was still more
- wondrous, he believed they would come and the prospect rejoiced him. There
- were as many lights, too, in the chandeliers as stars of a still winter&rsquo;s
- night, while the apartment seemed as large as a ten-acre lot and waved a
- broad forest of foliage.
- </p>
- <p>
- That he might be certainly present on the arrival of the first guest&mdash;for
- Jim Britt knew and felt his duties as a host&mdash;Jim Britt lay down upon
- a lounge which, to one side, was deeply, sweetly bowered beneath the
- overhanging palms. Then Jim Britt went earnestly to sleep and was no more
- to be aroused than a dead man.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo appeared; by twos and threes and tens, gathered
- the guests; Jim Britt slept on the sleep of innocence without a dream. A
- steering committee named to that purpose on the spot by the Statesman from
- Tupelo, sought to recover Jim Britt to a knowledge of his fortunate
- honors. Full sixty guests were there, and it was but right that he be
- granted the pleasure, not to say the glory, of their acquaintance.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was of no avail; Jim Britt would not be withdrawn from slumbers deep as
- death. The steering committee suspended its labors of restoration. As said
- the chairman in making his report, which, with a wine glass in his hand,
- he subsequently did between soup and fish:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Our most cunning efforts were fruitless. We even threw water on him, but
- it was like throwing water on a drowned rat.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus did his slumbers defend themselves, and Jim Britt snore unchecked.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the dinner was not to flag. The Statesman from Tupelo took the head of
- the table and the chairman of the steering committee the foot, the repast
- proceeded while wine and humor flowed.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was a dream of a dinner, a most desirable dinner, a dinner that should
- stand for years an honor to Jim Britt of Last Chance. It raged from eight
- till three. Corks and jokes were popping while laughter walked abroad;
- speeches were made and songs were sung. Through it all, the serene founder
- of the feast slept on, and albeit eloquence took up his name and twined
- about it flowery compliment, he knew it not. Tranquilly on his lounge he
- abode in dear oblivion.
- </p>
- <p>
- Things mundane end and so did Jim Britt&rsquo;s dinner. There struck an hour
- when the last song was sung, the last jest was made, and the last guest
- departed away. The Statesman from Tupelo superintended the transportation
- of Jim Britt to his room, and having made him safe, He of Tupelo went also
- out into the morning, and that famous banquet was of the perfumed past.
- </p>
- <p>
- It dawned Wednesday before the Statesman from Tupelo called again at
- Chamberlin&rsquo;s to ask for the excellent Jim Britt. The Statesman from Tupelo
- explained wherefore he was thus laggard.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I thought,&rdquo; he said to Chamberlin, &ldquo;that our friend would need Sunday,
- Monday and Tuesday to straighten up his head.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The man&rsquo;s gone,&rdquo; said Chamberlin; &ldquo;he departed Monday morning.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And whither?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Home to Last Chance.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What did he go home for?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That dinner broke him, I guess. It cost about eighteen hundred dollars,
- and he only had a little over a hundred when the bill was paid.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo mused, while clouds of regret began to gather on
- his brow. His conscience had him by the collar; his conscience was
- avenging that bankruptcy of Jim Britt.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo received Jim Britt&rsquo;s address from the hands of
- Chamberlin&rsquo;s clerk. The next day the Statesman from Tupelo wrote Jim Britt
- a letter. It ran thus:
- </p>
- <p>
- Chamberlin&rsquo;s Hotel.
- </p>
- <p>
- My Dear Sir:&mdash;
- </p>
- <p>
- Don&rsquo;t come back. Write me in full the exact story of what you want and why
- you want it. I&rsquo;ve got a copy of your bill from the Document Room, and so
- soon as I hear from you, shall urge the business before the proper
- committee.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Jim Britt&rsquo;s reply came to hand, the Statesman from Tupelo&mdash;whom
- nobody could resist&mdash;prevailed on the committee to report the bill.
- Then he got the Speaker, who while iron with others was as wax in the
- hands of the Statesman from Tupelo, to recognize him to bring up the bill.
- The House, equally under his spell, gave the Statesman from Tupelo its
- unanimous consent, and the bill was carried in the blink of a moment to
- its third reading and put upon its passage. Then the Statesman from Tupelo
- made a speech; he said it was a confession.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo talked for fifteen minutes while the House
- howled. He told the destruction of Jim Britt. He painted the dinner and
- pointed to those members of the House who attended; he reminded them of
- the desolation which their appetites had worked. He said the House was
- disgraced in the downfall of Jim Britt, and admitted that he and his
- fellow diners were culpable to a last extreme. But there was a way to
- repair all. The bill must be passed, the stain on the House must be washed
- away, Jim Britt must stand again on his fiscal feet, and then he, the
- Statesman from Tupelo, and his fellow conspirators, might once more look
- mankind in the eye.
- </p>
- <p>
- There be those who will do for laughter what they would not do for right.
- The House passed Jim Britt&rsquo;s bill unanimously.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Statesman from Tupelo carried it to the Senate. He explained the
- painful situation and described the remedy. Would the Senate unbend from
- its stern dignity as the greatest deliberative body of any clime or age,
- and come to the rescue of the Statesman from Tupelo and the House of
- Representatives now wallowing in infamy?
- </p>
- <p>
- The Senate would; by virtue of a kink in Senate rules which permitted the
- feat, the Jim Britt Bill was instantly and unanimously adopted without the
- intervention of a committee, the ordering a reference or a roll-call. The
- Statesman from Tupelo thanked the Senate and withdrew, pretending emotion.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was one more journey to make, one more power to consult, and the
- mighty work would be accomplished. The President must sign the bill. The
- Statesman from Tupelo walked in on that tremendous officer of state and
- told him the tale of injury done Jim Britt. The Statesman from Tupelo, by
- way of metaphor, called himself and his fellow sinners, cannibals, and
- showed how they had eaten Jim Britt. Then he reminded the President how he
- had once before gone to the rescue of cannibals in the case of Queen Lil.
- Would he now come to the relief of the Statesman from Tupelo and his
- fellow Anthropophagi of the House?
- </p>
- <p>
- The President was overcome with the word and the idea; he scribbled his
- name in cramped copperplate, and the deed was done. The Jim Britt Bill was
- a law, and Jim Britt saved from the life-long taunts of Samantha, the
- retentive. The road from Last Chance to the lead mine was built, and on
- hearing of its completion the Statesman from Tupelo wrote for an annual
- pass.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Then it was luck after all,&rdquo; said the Red
- </p>
- <p>
- Nosed Gentleman, &ldquo;rather than management to save the day for your Jim
- Britt.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Entirely so,&rdquo; conceded the Jolly Doctor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;There&rsquo;s a mighty deal in luck,&rdquo; observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, sagely.
- &ldquo;Certainly, it&rsquo;s the major part in gambling, and I think, too, luck is a
- decisive element in every victory or defeat a man experiences.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And, now,&rdquo; observed the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;now that you mention gambling,
- suppose you redeem your promise and give us the story of &lsquo;How to Tell the
- Last Four.&rsquo; The phrase is dark to me and has no meaning, but I inferred
- from what you were saying when you used it, that you alluded to some game
- of chance. Assuredly, I crave pardon if I be in error,&rdquo; and now the Sour
- Gentleman bowed with vast politeness.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You are not in error,&rdquo; returned the Red Nosed Gentleman, &ldquo;and I did refer
- to gambling. Casino, however, when played by Casino Joe was no game of
- chance, but of science; his secret, he said in explanation, lay in &lsquo;How to
- Tell the Last Four.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0014" id="link2HCH0014"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XIV.&mdash;HOW TO TELL THE LAST FOUR.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">C</span>asino Joe, when
- thirty years ago he came about the Bowery, was in manner and speech a
- complete expression of the rustical. His brow was high and fine and wise;
- but lank hair of yellow spoiled with its ragged fringe his face&mdash;a
- sallow face, wide of mouth and with high cheek bones. His garb was
- farmerish; kip-skin boots, coat and trousers of gray jeans, hickory shirt,
- and soft shapeless hat. Nor was Casino Joe in disguise; these habiliments
- made up the uniform of his ancestral New Hampshire. Countryman all over,
- was Casino Joe, and this look of the uncouth served him in his chosen
- profession.
- </p>
- <p>
- Possibly &ldquo;chosen&rdquo; as a term is indiscreet. Gamblers are born and not made;
- they occur and they do not choose; they are, compared with more
- conservative and lawful men, what wolves are to honest dogs&mdash;cousins,
- truly, but tameless depredators, living lean and hard, and dying when die
- they do, neglected, lone and poor. Yet it is fate; they are born to it as
- much as is the Ishmael wolf and must run their midnight downhill courses.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gamblers, that is true gamblers, are folk of specialties. Casino Joe&rsquo;s was
- the game which gave to him his name&mdash;at casino he throve invincibly.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is my gift,&rdquo; he said.
- </p>
- <p>
- Two things were with Casino Joe at birth; the genius for casino and that
- jack-knife talent to whittle which belongs with true-born Yankees. Of this
- latter I had proof long after poor Casino Joe wras dead and nourishing the
- grass. The races were in Boston; it was when Goldsmith Maid reigned Queen
- of the trotting turf. Her owner came to me at the Adams House and told how
- the aged sire of Goldsmith Maid, the great Henry Clay, was in his equine,
- joint-stiffened dotage pastured on a not too distant farm. He was eager to
- have a look at the old horse; and I went with him for this pilgrimage.
- </p>
- <p>
- As we drove up to the tavern which the farmstead we sought surrounded, my
- curious eye was caught by a fluttering windmill contrivance perched upon
- the gable. It was the figure of a woman done in pine and perhaps four feet
- of height, carved in the somewhat airy character of a ballet dancer.
- Instead of a dance, however, the lady contented herself with an exhibition
- of Indian Club swinging&mdash;one in each pine palm; the breeze offering
- the whirling impulse&mdash;in the execution wherof she poised herself with
- one foot on a wooden ball not unlike the arrowing bronze Diana of Madison
- Square. This figure, twirling clubs, as a mere windmill would have been
- amazing enough; but as though this were not sufficiently wondrous, at
- regular intervals our ballet dancer shifted her feet on the ball,
- replacing the right with the left and again the left with the right in
- measured alternation. The miracle of it held me transfixed.
- </p>
- <p>
- The host came fatly to his front stoop and smiled upon my wide-eyed
- interest.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Where did you get it?&rdquo; I asked.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That was carved with a jack-knife,&rdquo; replied mine host, &ldquo;by a party called
- &lsquo;Casino Joe.&rsquo; It took him&rsquo;most a year; he got it mounted and goin&rsquo; jest
- before he died.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- For long I had lost trace of Casino Joe; it was now at this change house I
- blundered on the news how my old gambling friend of the Bowery came with
- his consumption and some eight thousand dollars&mdash;enough to end one&rsquo;s
- life with&mdash;and made this place home until his death. His grave lay
- across a field in the little rural burying ground where he had played when
- a boy, for Casino Joe was native of these parts.
- </p>
- <p>
- There were no cheatings or tricky illicitisms hidden in Joe&rsquo;s supremacies
- of casino. They were works of a wax-like memory which kept the story of
- the cards as one makes entries in a ledger. When the last hands were out
- between Joe and an adversary, a glance at his mental entries of cards
- already played, and another at his own hand, unerringly informed him of
- what cards his opponent held. This he called &ldquo;Telling the last four.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was as an advantage more than enough to enable Joe to win; and while I
- lived in his company, I never knew him to be out of pocket by that
- divertisement. The marvel was that he could keep accurate track of
- fifty-two cards as they fell one after the other into play, and do these
- feats of memory in noise-ridden bar-rooms and amid a swirl of conversation
- in which he more or less bore part.
- </p>
- <p>
- Those quick folk of the fraternity whom he encountered and who from time
- to time lost money to Casino Joe, never once suspected his victories to be
- a result of mere memory. They held that some cheat took place. But as it
- was not detectable and no man might point it out, no word of fault was
- uttered. Joe took the money and never a protest; for it is as much an
- axiom of the gaming table as it is of the law that &ldquo;Fraud must be proved
- and will never be presumed or inferred.&rdquo; With no evidence, therefore, the
- losing gamblers made no protesting charge, and Joe went forward collecting
- the wealth of any and all who fought with him at his favorite science.
- </p>
- <p>
- Casino Joe, as I have said, accounted for his mastery at casino by his
- power to &ldquo;Tell the last four,&rdquo; and laid it all to memory.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And yet,&rdquo; said Joe one evening as I urged him to impart to me his secret
- more in detail, &ldquo;it may depend on something else. As I&rsquo;ve told you, it&rsquo;s
- my gift. Folk have their gifts. Once when I was in the town of Warrensburg
- in Western Missouri, I was shown a man who had gifts for mathematics that
- were unaccountable. He was a coarse, animalish creature, this
- mathematician; a half idiot and utterly without education. A sullen,
- unclean beast of a being, he shuffled about in a queer, plantigrade
- fashion like a bear. He was ill-natured, yet too timid to do harm; and
- besides a genius for figures, his distinguishing characteristics were
- hunger measured by four men&rsquo;s rations and an appetite for whiskey which to
- call swinish would be marking a weakness on one&rsquo;s own part in the art of
- simile. Yet this witless creature, unable to read his own printed name,
- knew as by an instinct every mathematical or geometrical term. You might
- propose nothing as a problem that he would not instantly solve. He could
- tell you like winking, the area of a seven or eight-angled figure so you
- but gave him the dimensions; he would announce the surface measurements of
- a sphere when told either its diameter or circumference. Once, as a poser,
- a learned teacher proposed a supposititious cone seven feet in altitude
- and with a diameter of three feet at the base, and asked at what distance
- from the apex it should be divided to make both parts equal of bulk and
- weight. The gross, growling being made correct, unhesitating reply. This
- monster of mathematics seemed also to carry a chronometer in his stomach,
- for day or night, he could and would&mdash;for a drink of rum&mdash;tell
- you the hour to any splinter of a second. You might set your watch by him
- as if he were the steeple clock. I don&rsquo;t profess,&rdquo; concluded Casino Joe,
- &ldquo;to either the habits or the imbecility of this genius of figures, yet it
- may well be that my abilities to keep track of fifty-two Cards as they
- appear in play and know at every moment&mdash;as a bookkeeper does a
- balance&mdash;what cards are yet to come, are not of cultivation or
- acquirement, but were extant within me at my birth.&rdquo; When Casino Joe
- appeared in the Bowery he came to gamble at cards. That buzzing
- thoroughfare was then the promenade of the watchful brotherhood of chance.
- In that hour, too, it stood more the fashion&mdash;for there are fashions
- in gambling as in everything else&mdash;to win and lose money at
- short-cards, and casino enjoyed particular vogue. There were scores of
- eminent practitioners about New York, and Joe had little trouble in
- securing recognition. Indeed, he might have played the full twenty-four
- hours of every day could he have held up his head to such labors.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was at the advent of our rural Joe into metropolitan circles none
- more alert or breathless for pastmastery in unholy speculation than
- myself. About twenty-one should have been my years, and I carried that
- bubbling spirit for success common to the youth of every walk. <i>Aut
- Cosar aut nullus!</i> was my warcry, and I did not consider Joe and his
- career for long before I was slave to the one hope of finally gaining his
- secret. One might found fortune on it; like the philosopher&rsquo;s stone it
- turned everything to gold.
- </p>
- <p>
- With those others who fell before Joe I also believed his success to be
- offspring of some cheat. And while the rustic Joe was engaged against some
- fellow immoralist, I&rsquo;ve sat and watched for hours upon end to discover
- what winding thing Joe did. There was no villainy of double dealing or
- chicane of cut-shifting or of marked cards at which I was not adept. And
- what I could so darkly perform I was equally quick to discover when
- another attempted it. But, albeit I eyed poor Joe with a cat&rsquo;s vigilance&mdash;a
- vigilance to have saved the life of Argus had he but emulated it with his
- hundred eyes&mdash;I noted nothing. And the reason was a simple one. There
- was literally nothing to discover; Joe played honestly enough; his
- advantage dwelt in his memory and that lay hidden within his head.
- </p>
- <p>
- Despairing of a discovery by dint of watching, I made friendly overtures
- to Joe, hoping to wheedle a secret which I could not surprise. My proffers
- of comradeship were met more than half way. Joe was a kindly though a
- lonely soul and had few friends; his queer garb of the cowpastures
- together with his unfailing domination at casino kept others of the
- fraternity at a distance. Also I had been much educated of books by Father
- Glennon, and put in my spare time with reading. As Joe himself had dived
- somewhat into books, we were doubly drawn to each other. Hours have we sat
- together in Joe&rsquo;s nobly furnished rooms&mdash;for he lived well if he did
- not dress well&mdash;and overhauled for our mutual amusement the
- literature of the centuries back to Chaucer and his Tabard Inn.
- </p>
- <p>
- At this time Joe was already in the coils of that consumption whereof at
- last he died. And what with a racking cough and an inability to breathe
- while lying down, Joe seldom slept in a bed. The best he might do was to
- gain what snatches of slumber he could while propped in an arm-chair. It
- thus befell that at his suggestion and to tell the whole truth, at his
- generous expense, I came finally to room with Joe. Somebody should utilize
- the bed. Being young and sound of nerves, his restless night-roamings
- about the floors disturbed not me; I slept serenely through as I doubtless
- would through the crack of doom had such calamity surprised us at that
- time, and Joe and I prospered bravely in company.
- </p>
- <p>
- Beseech and plead as I might, however, Joe would not impart to me that
- hidden casino strength beyond his word that no fraud was practiced&mdash;a
- fact whereof my watchings had made me sure&mdash;and curtly describing it
- as an ability to &ldquo;Tell the last four.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- While Joe housed me as his guest for many months and paid the bills, one
- is not to argue therefrom any unhappy pauperism on my boyish part. In good
- sooth! I was more than rich during those days, with a fortune of anywhere
- from five hundred to as many as four thousand dollars. Like all disciples
- of chance I had these riches ever ready in my pocket for what prey might
- offer.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was now and then well for Joe that I went thus provided. That badly
- garbed squire of good dame Fortune, who failed not of a profit at casino,
- had withal an overpowering taste to play faro; and as if by some law of
- compensation and to preserve an equilibrium, he would seem to sit down to
- a faro layout only to lose.
- </p>
- <p>
- Time and again he came to his rooms stripped of the last dollar. On these
- harrowing occasions Joe would borrow a round-number stake from me and so
- return to the legitimate sure harvests of casino, vowing never to lose
- himself and his money in any quicksands of farobank again.
- </p>
- <p>
- It must be admitted that these anti-faro vows were never kept; once firm
- on his feet by virtue of casino renewed, it was not over long ere he
- &ldquo;tried it just once more,&rdquo; to lose again. These faro bankruptcies would
- overtake Joe about once a month.
- </p>
- <p>
- One day I made a mild plot; I had foregone all hope of coaxing Joe&rsquo;s
- secret from him; now I resolved to bring against him the pressure of a
- small intrigue. I lay in ambush for Joe, waylaid him as it were in the
- weak hour of his destitution and ravished from him at the point of his
- necessities that which I could come by in no other way.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was following a disastrous night at faro when Joe appeared without so
- much silver in his pockets as might serve to keep the fiends from dancing
- there. Having related his losses he asked for the usual five hundred
- wherewith to re-enter the sure lists of casino and begin the combat anew.
- </p>
- <p>
- To his sore amazement and chagrin&mdash;and somewhat to his alarm, for at
- first he thought me as poor as himself from my refusal&mdash;I shook my
- sage young head.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Haven&rsquo;t you got it?&rdquo; asked Joe anxiously.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Oh, yes,&rdquo; I replied, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve got it; and it&rsquo;s yours on one condition. Teach
- me how to &lsquo;Tell the last four,&rsquo; and you may have five hundred and five
- hundred with it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then I pointed out to Joe his mean unfairness in not equipping me with
- this resistless knowledge. Save for that one pregnant secret I was as
- perfect at casino as any sharper on the Bowery. Likewise, were the
- situation reversed, I&rsquo;d be quick to instruct him. I&rsquo;d lend no more; there
- would come no further five hundred save as the price of that touchstone&mdash;the
- golden secret of how to &ldquo;Tell the last four.&rdquo; This I set forth jealously.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why, then,&rdquo; said Joe, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll do my best to teach you. But it will cost a
- deal of work. You&rsquo;ll have to put in hours of practice and curry and groom
- and train your memory as if it were a horse for a great race. I tell you
- the more readily&mdash;for I could elsewhere easily get the five hundred
- and for that matter five thousand other dollars to keep it company&mdash;since
- I believe I&rsquo;ve not many months to live at best&rdquo;&mdash;here, as if in
- confirmation, a gust of coughing shook him&mdash;&ldquo;and this secret shall be
- your legacy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- With these words, Joe got a deck of cards and began a game of casino with
- me as an adversary. Slowly playing the cards, he explained and strove to
- illustrate those mental methods by which he kept account and tabbed them
- as they were played. If I could lay bare this system here I would; but its
- very elaboration forbids. It was as though Joe owned a blackboard in his
- head with the fifty-two cards told off by numbers in column, and from
- which he erased a card the moment it appeared in play. By processes of
- elimination, he came finally to &ldquo;Tell the last four,&rdquo; and as the last
- hands were dealt knew those held by his opposite as much as ever he knew
- his own. This advantage, with even luck and perfect skill made him not to
- be conquered.
- </p>
- <p>
- It took many sittings with many lessons many hours long; but in time
- because of my young faculties&mdash;not too much cumbered of those
- thousand and one concerns to come with years and clamor for remembrance&mdash;I
- grew as perfect as Joe.
- </p>
- <p>
- And it was well I learned the secret when I did. Soon after, I became
- separated from Joe; I went southward to New Orleans and when I was next to
- New York Joe had disappeared. Nor could I find trace or sign of his
- whereabouts. He went in truth to his old village, and my earliest
- information thereof came only when the tavern host told the origin of the
- club-swinging ballet dancer then toeing it so gallantly on his gables.
- </p>
- <p>
- But while I parted with my friend, I never forgot him. The knowledge he
- gave double-armed me at the game. It became the reason of often riches in
- my hands, and was ever a resort when I erred over horse races or was
- beaten down by some storm of faro. Then it was profitably I recalled
- Casino Joe and his instructions; and his invincible secret of &ldquo;How to tell
- the last four.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Is it not strange,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, when the Red Nosed Gentleman
- had finished, &ldquo;that I who never cared to gamble, should listen with
- delight to a story of gamblers and gambling? But so it is; I&rsquo;ve heard
- scores such in my time and always with utmost zest. I&rsquo;ll even tell one
- myself&mdash;as it was told me&mdash;when it again becomes my duty to
- furnish this good company entertainment. Meanwhile, unless my memory
- fails, it should be the task of our descendant of Hiawatha&rdquo;&mdash;here the
- Jolly Doctor turned smilingly to Sioux Sam&mdash;&ldquo;to take up the burden of
- the evening.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The Old Cattleman, joining with the Jolly Doctor in the suggestion, and
- Sioux Sam being in no wise loth to be heard, our half-savage friend
- related &ldquo;How Moh-Kwa Fed the Catfish.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0015" id="link2HCH0015"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XV.&mdash;HOW MOH-KWA FED THE CATFISH.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">O</span>ne day Moh-Kwa,
- the Wise Bear, had a quarrel with Ish-koo-dah, the Fire. Moh-Kwa was gone
- from home two days, for Moh-Kwa had found a large patch of ripe
- blackberries, an&rsquo; he said it was prudent to stay an&rsquo; eat them all up lest
- some other man find them. So Moh-Kwa stayed; an&rsquo; though he ate very hard
- the whole time an&rsquo; never slept, so many an&rsquo; fat were the blackberries, it
- took two suns to eat them.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa came into his cavern, he found Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, grown
- small an&rsquo; hot an&rsquo; angry, for he had not been fed for two days. Moh-Kwa
- gave the Fire a bundle of dry wood to eat, an&rsquo; when the Fire&rsquo;s stomach was
- full an&rsquo; he had grown big an&rsquo; bright with plenty, he sat up on his bed of
- coals an&rsquo; found fault with Moh-Kwa for his neglect.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; should you neglect me again for two days,&rdquo; said the Fire, &ldquo;I will
- know I am not wanted an&rsquo; shall go away.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa was much tired with no sleep, so he answered Ish-koo-dah, the
- Fire, sharply.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You are always hungry,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa; &ldquo;also you are hard to suit. If I
- give you green wood, you will not eat it; if the wood be wet, you turn
- away. Nothing but old dry wood will you accept. Beggars like you should
- not own such fine tastes. An&rsquo; do you think, Fire, that I who have much to
- do an&rsquo; say an&rsquo; many places to go&mdash;I, Moh-Kwa, who am as busy as the
- bees in the Moon of Blossoms, have time to stay ever by your side to pass
- you new dry wood to eat? Go to; you are more trouble that a papoose!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, did not say anything to this, for the Fire&rsquo;s
- feelings were hurt; an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa who was heavy with his labors over the
- blackberries lay down an&rsquo; took a big sleep.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa awoke, he sat blinking in the darkness of his cavern, for
- Ish-koo-dah, while Moh-Kwa slept, had gone out an&rsquo; left night behind.
- </p>
- <p>
- For five days Moh-Kwa had no fire an&rsquo; it gave him a bad heart; for while
- Moh-Kwa could eat his food raw an&rsquo; never cared for that, he could not
- smoke his kinnikinick unless Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, was there to light his
- pipe for him.
- </p>
- <p>
- For five days Moh-Kwa smoked no kinnikinick; an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa got angry because
- of it an&rsquo; roared an&rsquo; shouted up an&rsquo; down the canyons, an&rsquo; to show he did
- not care, Moh-Kwa smashed his redstone pipe on a rock. But in his stomach
- Moh-Kwa cared, an&rsquo; would have traded Ish-koodah, the Fire, four armsful of
- dry cedar just to have him light his kinnikinick but once. But
- Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, was gone out an&rsquo; would not come back.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0011" id="linkimage-0011"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0239.jpg" alt="0239 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0239.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- Openhand, the good Sioux an&rsquo; great hunter, heard Moh-Kwa roaring for his
- kinnikinick. An&rsquo; Openhand told him he behaved badly, like a young squaw
- who wants new feathers an&rsquo; cannot get them. Then Openhand gave Moh-Kwa
- another pine, an&rsquo; brought the Fire from his own lodge; an&rsquo; again Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s
- cavern blazed with Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, in the middle of the floor, an&rsquo;
- Moh-Kwa smoked his kinnikinick. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s heart felt good an&rsquo; soft an&rsquo;
- pleasant like the sunset in the Moon of Fruit. Also, he gave Ish-koo-dah
- plenty of wood to eat an&rsquo; never scolded him for being always hungry.
- </p>
- <p>
- All the Sioux loved Openhand; for no one went by his lodge empty but
- Openhand gave him a piece of buffalo meat; an&rsquo; if a Sioux was cold, he put
- a blanket about his shoulders. An&rsquo; for this he was named &ldquo;Openhand,&rdquo; an&rsquo;
- the Sioux were never tired of talking good talk of Open-hand, an&rsquo; the
- noise of his praises never died out.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coldheart hated Openhand because he was so much loved. Coldheart was
- himself sulky an&rsquo; hard, an&rsquo; his hand was shut tight like a beaver-trap
- that is sprung, an&rsquo; it would not open to give anything away. Those who
- came hungry went hungry for all of Coldheart; an&rsquo; if they were cold, they
- were cold. Coldheart wrapped his robes the closer, an&rsquo; was the warmest
- whenever he thought the frost-wolf was gnawing others.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I do not rule the ice,&rdquo; said Coldheart; &ldquo;hunger does not come or go on
- its war-trail by my orders. An&rsquo; if the Sioux freeze or starve, an&rsquo;
- Pau-guk, the Death, walks among the lodges, it is because the time is
- Pau-guk&rsquo;s an&rsquo; I cannot help it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- So Coldheart kept his blankets an&rsquo; his buffalo meat for himself an&rsquo; his
- son, the Blackbird, an&rsquo; gave nothing away. An&rsquo; for these things, Coldheart
- was hated while Openhand was praised; an&rsquo; the breast of Coldheart was so
- eaten with his wrath against Openhand that it seemed as though
- Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, had gone into Coldheart&rsquo;s bosom an&rsquo; made a camp.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coldheart would have called Pau-guk to his elbow an&rsquo; killed Openhand; but
- Coldheart was not sure. The Openhand moved as quick as a fish in the
- Yellowstone, an&rsquo; stood as tall an&rsquo; strong as the big pine on the hill;
- there were no three warriors, the bravest of the Sioux, who could have
- gone on the trail of Openhand an&rsquo; shown his skelp on their return, for
- Openhand was a mighty fighter an&rsquo; had a big heart, so that even Fear
- himself was afraid of Openhand an&rsquo; never dared come where he was.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coldheart knew well that he could not fight with Openhand; for to find
- this out, he made his strongest medicine an&rsquo; called Jee-bi, the Spirit;
- an&rsquo; Jee-bi talked with Pau-guk, the Death, an&rsquo; asked Pau-guk if Coldheart
- went on the trail of Openhand to take his skelp, which one Pau-guk would
- have at the trail&rsquo;s end. An&rsquo; Pau-guk said he would have Coldheart, for
- Openhand would surely kill him. When Jee-bi, the Spirit, told Coldheart
- the word of Pau-guk, Coldheart saw then that he must go a new trail with
- his hate.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coldheart smoked an&rsquo; smoked many pipes; but the thoughts of Openhand an&rsquo;
- how he was loved by the Sioux made his kinnikinick bitter. Still Coldheart
- smoked; an&rsquo; at last the thought came that if he could not kill Openhand,
- he would kill the Young Wolf, who was Openhand&rsquo;s son. When this thought
- folded its wings an&rsquo; perched in the breast of Coldheart, he called for the
- evil Lynx, who was Coldheart&rsquo;s friend, an&rsquo; since he was the wickedest of
- the Sioux, would do what Coldheart said.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Lynx came an&rsquo; sat with Coldheart in his lodge; an&rsquo; the lodge was
- closed tight so that none might listen, an&rsquo; because it was cold. The
- Coldheart told the Lynx to go with his war-axe when the next sun was up
- an&rsquo; beat out the brains of the Young Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; when he is dead,&rdquo; said Coldheart, &ldquo;you must bring me the Young Wolf&rsquo;s
- heart to eat. Then I will have my revenge on Openhand, his father, whom I
- hate; an&rsquo; whenever I meet the Openhand I will laugh with the thought that
- I have eaten his son&rsquo;s heart.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But there was one who listened to Coldheart while he gave his orders to
- the evil Lynx, although she was no Sioux. This was the Widow of the Great
- Rattlesnake of the Rocks who had long before been slain by Yellow Face,
- his brother medicine. The Widow having hunted long an&rsquo; hard had crawled
- into the lodge of Cold-heart to warm herself while she rested. An&rsquo; as she
- slept beneath a buffalo robe, the noise of Coldheart talking to the evil
- Lynx woke the Widow up; an&rsquo; so she sat up under her buffalo robe an&rsquo; heard
- every word, for a squaw is always curious an&rsquo; would sooner hear new talk
- than find a string of beads.
- </p>
- <p>
- That night as Moh-Kwa smoked by Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, an&rsquo; fed him dry
- sticks so he would not leave him again, the Widow came an&rsquo; warmed herself
- by Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s side. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa asked the Widow how she fared; an&rsquo; the
- Widow while hungry said she was well, only that her heart was made heavy
- by the words of Coldheart. Then the Widow told Moh-Kwa what Coldheart had
- asked the evil Lynx to do, an&rsquo; how for his revenge against Openhand he
- would eat the Young Wolf&rsquo;s heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa listened to the Widow with his head on one side, for he would not
- lose a word; an&rsquo; when she had done, Moh-Kwa was so pleased that he put
- down his pipe an&rsquo; went to a nest which the owls had built on the side of
- the cavern an&rsquo; took down a young owl an&rsquo; gave it to the Widow to eat. An&rsquo;
- the Widow thanked Moh-Kwa an&rsquo; swallowed the little owl, while the old owl
- flew all about the cavern telling the other owls what Moh-Kwa had done.
- The owls were angry an&rsquo; shouted at Moh-Kwa.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The Catfish people said you were a Pawnee! But you are worse; you are a
- Shoshone, Moh-Kwa; yes, you are a Siwash! Bird-robber, little owl-killer,
- you an&rsquo; your Rattlesnake Widow are both Siwashes!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Kwa paid no heed; he did not like the owls, for they stole his
- meat; an&rsquo; when he would sleep, a company of the older owls would get
- together an&rsquo; hold a big talk that was like thunder in Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s cavern an&rsquo;
- kept him awake. Moh-Kwa said at last that if the owls called the Widow who
- was his guest a Siwash again, he would give her two more baby owls. With
- that the old owls perched on their points of rocks an&rsquo; were silent, for
- they feared Moh-Kwa an&rsquo; knew he was not their friend.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Widow had eaten her little owl, she curled up to sleep two weeks,
- for such was the Widow&rsquo;s habit when she had eaten enough. An&rsquo; as she
- snored pleasantly, feathers an&rsquo; owl-down were blown out through her nose,
- but the young owl was gone forever.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa left the Widow sleeping an&rsquo; went down the canyon in the morning to
- meet the evil Lynx where he knew he would pass close by the bank of the
- Yellowstone. An&rsquo; when Moh-Kwa saw the evil Lynx creeping along with his
- war-axe in his hand on the trail of the Young Wolf&rsquo;s heart, he gave a
- great shout: &ldquo;Ah! Lynx, I&rsquo;ve got you!&rdquo; An&rsquo; then he started for the Lynx
- with his paws spread. For Moh-Kwa loved the Open-hand, who brought back to
- him Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, when he had gone out of Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s cavern an&rsquo;
- would not return.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Kwa did not reach the Lynx, for up a tree swarmed the Lynx out of
- Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s reach.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa saw the evil Lynx hugging close to the tree, the new thought
- made Moh-Kwa laugh. An&rsquo; with that he reached up with his great arms an&rsquo;
- began to bend down the tree like a whip. When Moh-Kwa had bent the tree
- enough, he let it go free; an&rsquo; the tree sprang straight like an
- osage-orange bow. It was so swift an&rsquo; like a whip that the Lynx could not
- hold on, but went whirling out over the river like a wild duck when its
- wing is broken by an arrow; an&rsquo; then the Lynx splashed into the
- Yellowstone.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Lynx struck splashing into the Yellowstone, all the Catfish
- people rushed for him with the Big Chief of the Catfish at their head.
- Also, Ah-meek, the Beaver, was angry; for Ahmeek was crossing the
- Yellowstone with a bundle of bulrushes in his mouth to help build his
- winter house on the bank, an&rsquo; the Lynx struck so near to Ah-meek that the
- waves washed his face an&rsquo; whiskers, an&rsquo; he was startled an&rsquo; lost the
- bulrushes out of his mouth an&rsquo; they were washed away.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ah-meek who was angry, an&rsquo; the Catfish people who were hungry, charged on
- the Lynx; but the Lynx was not far enough from the shore for them, an&rsquo;
- while the Catfish people pinched him an&rsquo; Ah-meek, the Beaver, clawed him,
- the Lynx crawled out on the bank an&rsquo; was safe.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Ivwa met the Lynx when he crawled out of the Yellowstone looking
- like Dah-hin-dah, the Bull-frog, an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa picked him up with his paws
- to throw him back.
- </p>
- <p>
- But a second new thought came; an&rsquo; although the Catfish people screamed at
- him an&rsquo; Ah-meek who had lost his bulrushes was black with anger, Moh-Kwa
- did not throw the Lynx back into the river but stood him on his feet an&rsquo;
- told him what to do. An&rsquo; when Moh-Kwa gave him the orders, the Lynx
- promised to obey.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa killed a fawn; an&rsquo; the Lynx took its heart in his hand an&rsquo; went
- with it to Coldheart an&rsquo; said it was the heart of Young Wolf. An&rsquo;
- Coldheart roasted it an&rsquo; ate it, thinking it was Young Wolf&rsquo;s heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- For a day was the Coldheart glad, for he felt strong an&rsquo; warm with the
- thought that now he was revenged against Openhand; an&rsquo; Coldheart longed to
- tell Openhand that he had eaten his son&rsquo;s heart. But Coldheart was too
- wise to make this boast; he knew that Openhand whether with knife or lance
- or arrow would give him at once to Pau-guk, an&rsquo; that would end his
- revenge.
- </p>
- <p>
- Still Coldheart thought he would go to Open-hand&rsquo;s lodge an&rsquo; feed his eyes
- an&rsquo; ears with Open-hand&rsquo;s groans an&rsquo; mournings when now his son, the Young
- Wolf, was gone. But when Coldheart came to the lodge of Openhand, he was
- made sore to meet the Young Wolf who was starting forth to hunt. Coldheart
- spoke with the Young Wolf to make sure he had been cheated; an&rsquo; then he
- went back to kill the Lynx.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Coldheart was too late; the Lynx had not waited; now he was gone with
- his squaws an&rsquo; his ponies an&rsquo; his blankets to become a Pawnee. The Lynx
- was tired of being a Sioux.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Widow&rsquo;s sleep was out, Moh-Kwa sent her to hide in the lodge of
- Coldheart to hear what next he would plan. The Widow went gladly, for
- Moh-Kwa promised four more small young owls just out of the egg. The Widow
- lay under the buffalo robe an&rsquo; heard the words of Coldheart. In a week,
- she came back to Moh-Kwa an&rsquo; told him what Coldheart planned.
- </p>
- <p>
- Coldheart had sent twenty ponies to the Black-foot chief, Dull Knife,
- where he lived on the banks of the Little Bighorn. Also, Coldheart sent
- these words in the mouth of his runner:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;My son and the son of my enemy will come to your camp in one moon. You
- will marry the Rosebud, your daughter, to my son, while the son of my
- enemy you will tie an&rsquo; give to your young men to shoot at with their
- arrows until he be dead, an&rsquo; afterward until they have had enough sport.
- My son will bring you a white arrow; the son of my enemy will bring you a
- black arrow.&rdquo; Moh-Kwa laughed when he heard this from the Widow&rsquo;s lips;
- an&rsquo; because she had been faithful, Moh-Kwa gave her the four small owls
- just from the egg. An&rsquo; the older owls took it quietly an&rsquo; only whispered
- their anger; for Moh-Kwa said that if they screamed an&rsquo; shouted when now
- he must sit an&rsquo; think until his head ached, he would knock down every
- nest.
- </p>
- <p>
- When his plan was ripe, Coldheart put on a good face an&rsquo; went to the lodge
- of Openhand an&rsquo; gave him a red blanket an&rsquo; said he was Openhand&rsquo;s friend.
- An&rsquo; Openhand an&rsquo; all the Sioux said this must be true talk because of the
- red blanket; for Coldheart was never known to give anything away before.
- </p>
- <p>
- Openhand an&rsquo; Coldheart sat down an&rsquo; smoked; for Moh-Kwa had never told how
- Coldheart had sent the Lynx for the Young Wolf&rsquo;s heart. Moh-Kwa never told
- tales; moreover Moh-Kwa had also his own plans as well as Coldheart.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Openhand an&rsquo; Coldheart came to part, an&rsquo; Coldheart was to go again to
- his own lodge, he asked that Openhand send his son, Young Wolf, with the
- Blackbird who would go to wed the young squaw, Rosebud, where she dwelt
- with Dull Knife, her father, in their camp on the Little Bighorn. An&rsquo;
- Openhand did not hesitate, but said, &ldquo;Yes;&rdquo; an&rsquo; the Young Wolf himself was
- glad to go, like all boys who hope to see new scenes.
- </p>
- <p>
- As Young Wolf an&rsquo; the Blackbird next day rode away, Coldheart stuck a
- black arrow in the cow-skin quiver of Young Wolf, an&rsquo; a white arrow in
- that of the Blackbird, saying:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Give these to the Dull Knife that he may know you are my sons an&rsquo; come
- from me, an&rsquo; treat you with much love.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Many days the young men traveled to reach Dull Knife&rsquo;s camp on the Little
- Bighorn. In the night of their last camp, Moh-Kwa came silently, an&rsquo; while
- the young men slept swapped Coldheart&rsquo;s arrows; an&rsquo; when they rode to the
- lodge of Dull Knife, an&rsquo; while the scowling Blackfeet gathered about&mdash;for
- the sight of a Sioux gives a Blackfoot a hot heart&mdash;the black arrow
- was in the quiver of the Blackbird an&rsquo; the white arrow in that of Young
- Wolf.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How!&rdquo; said the young men to Dull Knife. &ldquo;How! how!&rdquo; said Dull Knife. &ldquo;An&rsquo;
- now, my sons, where are the arrows which are your countersigns?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- When the young men took out the arrows they saw that they had been
- changed; but they knew not their message an&rsquo; thought no difference would
- come. So they made no talk since that would lose time; an&rsquo; Young Wolf gave
- Dull Knife the white arrow while the Blackbird gave him the black arrow.
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; holding an arrow in each hand&mdash;one white, one black&mdash;Dull
- Knife said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;For the twenty ponies which we have got, the Blackfeet will carry forth
- the word of Cold-heart; for the Blackfeet keep their treaties, being
- honest men.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0012" id="linkimage-0012"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0251.jpg" alt="0251 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0251.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; so it turns that the Blackbird is shot full of arrows until he
- bristles like the quills on the back of Kagh, the Hedgepig. But Young Wolf
- is taken to the Rosebud, an&rsquo; they are married. The Young Wolf would have
- said: &ldquo;No!&rdquo; for he did not understand; but Dull Knife showed him first a
- war-axe an&rsquo; next the Rosebud. An&rsquo; the Rosebud was more beautiful in the
- eye of youth than any war-axe; besides Young Wolf was many days march from
- the lodge of his father, Openhand, an&rsquo; marriage is better than death.
- Thinking all of which, the Young Wolf did not say &ldquo;no&rdquo; but said &ldquo;yes,&rdquo; an&rsquo;
- at the wedding there was a great feast, for the Dull Knife was a big chief
- an&rsquo; rich.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ma-ma, the Woodpecker, stood on the top of a dead tree an&rsquo; saw the
- wedding; an&rsquo; when it was over, he flew straight an&rsquo; told Moh-Kwa so that
- Moh-Kwa might know.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Young Wolf an&rsquo; the Rosebud on their return were a day&rsquo;s ride from the
- Sioux, Moh-Kwa went to the lodge of Coldheart an&rsquo; said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Come, great plotter, an&rsquo; meet your son an&rsquo; his new squaw.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; Coldheart came because Moh-Kwa took him by his belts an&rsquo; ran with him;
- for Moh-Kwa was so big an&rsquo; strong he could run with a pony an&rsquo; its rider
- in his mouth.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa told Coldheart how the Blackbird gave Dull Knife the black arrow
- an&rsquo; was shot with all the arrows of five quivers. Coldheart groaned like
- the buffalo when he dies. Then Moh-Kwa showed him where Young Wolf came on
- with the beautiful Rosebud; and that he was followed by twenty pack-ponies
- which carried the presents of Dull Knife for his daughter an&rsquo; his new son.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; now,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;you have seen enough; for you have seen that you
- have made your foe happy an&rsquo; killed your own son. Also, I have cheated the
- Catfish people twice; once with the Big Medicine Elk an&rsquo; once with the
- Lynx, both of whom I gave to the Catfish people an&rsquo; took back. It is true,
- I have cheated the good Catfish folk who were once my friends, an&rsquo; now
- they speak hard of me an&rsquo; call me a &lsquo;Pawnee,&rsquo; the whole length of the
- Yellowstone from the Missouri to the Falls. However, Moh Kwa has something
- for the Catfish people this time which he will not take back, an&rsquo; by
- to-morrow&rsquo;s sun, the river will ring with Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s praises.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa carried Coldheart to the Yellowstone, an&rsquo; he sang an&rsquo; shouted for
- all the Catfish people to come. Then Moh-Kwa took Coldheart to a deep
- place in the river a long way from the bank. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa held Coldheart
- while the Chief of the Catfish got a strong hold, an&rsquo; his squaw&mdash;who
- was four times bigger than the Catfish Chief&mdash;got also a strong hold;
- an&rsquo; then what others of the Catfish people were there took their holds.
- When every catfish was ready Moh-Kwa let Coldheart slip from between his
- paws, an&rsquo; with a swish an&rsquo; a swirl, the Catfish people snatched Coldheart
- under the water an&rsquo; tore him to pieces. For many days the Yellowstone was
- bank-full of good words for Moh-Kwa; an&rsquo; all the Catfish people said he
- was a Sioux an&rsquo; no cheat of a Pawnee who gives only to take back.
- </p>
- <p>
- That night in his cavern Moh-Kwa sat by Ish-koo-dah, the Fire, an&rsquo; smoked
- an&rsquo; told the Widow the story, an&rsquo; how it all began by Openhand bringing
- the Fire back to be his friend when they had quarreled an&rsquo; the Fire had
- gone out an&rsquo; would not return. An&rsquo; while Moh-Kwa told the tale to the
- Widow, not an owl said a word or even whispered, but blinked in silence
- each on his perch; for the Widow seemed lean an&rsquo; slim as she lay by the
- fire an&rsquo; listened; an&rsquo; the owls thought it would be foolish to remind
- Moh-Kwa of their presence.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now, do you know,&rdquo; said the Red Nosed Gentleman, with his head on one
- side as one who would be deemed deeply the critic, &ldquo;these Indian stories
- are by no means bad.&rdquo; Then leaning across to the Old Cattleman, he asked:
- &ldquo;Does our Sioux friend make them up?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Them tales,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman, lighting a new cigar, &ldquo;is most
- likely as old as the Yellowstone itse&rsquo;f. The squaws an&rsquo; the old bucks tell
- &rsquo;em to the children, an&rsquo; so they gets passed along the line. Sioux
- Sam only repeats what he&rsquo;s done heard from his mother.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And now,&rdquo; remarked the Jolly Doctor, addressing the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;what
- say you? How about that story of the Customs concerning which you whetted
- our interest by giving us the name. It is strange, too, that while my
- interest is still as strong as ever, the name itself has clean slipped
- through the fingers of my memory.&rdquo; At this the Jolly Doctor glared about
- the circle as though in wonder at the phenomenon of an interest which
- remained when the reason of it had faded away.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I will willingly give you the story,&rdquo; said the Sour Gentleman. &ldquo;That name
- you search for is &lsquo;The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0016" id="link2HCH0016"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XVI.&mdash;THE EMPEROR&rsquo;S CIGARS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>t is not the blood
- which flows at the front, my friends, that is the worst of war; it is the
- money corruption that goes on at the rear. In old Sparta, theft was not
- theft unless discovered in process of accomplishment, and those larcenous
- morals taught of Lycurgus would seem, on the tails of our own civil war,
- to have found widest consent and adoption throughout every department of
- government. The public hour reeled with rottenness, and you may be very
- sure the New York Customs went as staggeringly corrupt as the rest.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is to my own proper shame that I should have fallen to have art or part
- or lot in such iniquities. Yet I went into them with open eyes and hands,
- and a heart&mdash;hungry as a pike&rsquo;s&mdash;for whatever of spoil chance or
- skilfully constructed opportunity might place within my reach. My sole
- defense, and that now sounds slight and trivial even to my partial ears,
- was the one I advanced the other day; my two-ply hatred of government both
- for injuries done my region of the South as well as the personal ruin
- visited on me when my ill-wishers struck down that enterprise of steamed
- tobacco which was making me rich. That is all I may urge in extenuation,
- and I concede its meager insufficiency.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I&rsquo;ve said, I obtained an appointment as an inspector of Customs, and
- afterward worked side by side, and I might add hand and glove, with our
- old friends, Quin and Lorns of the Story of the Smuggled Silks. That
- fearsome honest Chief Inspector who so put my heart to a trot had been
- dismissed&mdash;for some ill-timed integrity, I suppose&mdash;sharply in
- the wake of that day he frightened me; and when I took up life&rsquo;s burdens
- as an officer of the Customs, my companions, together with myself, were
- all black sheep together. Was there by any chance an honest man among us,
- he did not mention it, surely; nor did he lapse into act or deed that
- might have been evidence to prove him pure. Yes, forsooth! ignorance could
- be overlooked, drunkenness condoned, indolence reproved; but for that
- officer of our Customs who in those days was found honest, there shone no
- ray of hope. He was seized on and cast into outer unofficial darkness,
- there to exercise his dangerous probity in private life. There was no room
- for such among us; no peace nor safety for the rest while he remained.
- Wherefore, we of a proper blackness, were like so many descendants of
- Diogenes, forever searching among ourselves to find an honest man; but
- with fell purpose when discovered, of his destruction. We maintained a
- strictest quarantine against any infection of truth, and I positively
- believe, with such success, that it was excluded from our midst. That
- honest Chief Inspector was dismissed, I say; Lorns told me of it before
- I&rsquo;d been actively in place an hour, and the news gave me deepest
- satisfaction.
- </p>
- <p>
- That gentleman who was official head of the coterie of revenue hunters to
- which I was assigned was peculiarly the man unusual. His true name, if I
- ever heard it, I&rsquo;ve forgot; among us of the Customs, he was known as
- Betelnut Jack. Lorns took me into his presence and made us known to one
- another early in my revenue career. I had been told stories of this man by
- both Lorns and Quin. They deeply reverenced him for his virtues of courage
- and cunning, and the praises of Betelnut Jack were constant in their
- mouths.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack was at his home in the Bowery. Jack, in years gone by, had
- been a hardy member of one of those Volunteer fire companies which in that
- hour notably augmented the perils of an urban life. Jack was a doughty
- fighter, and with a speaking trump in one hand and a spanner-wrench in the
- other, had done deeds of daring whereof one might still hear the echo. And
- he became for these strong-hand reasons a tower of strength in politics;
- and obtained that eminence in the Customs which was his when first we met.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack received Lorns and myself in his dingy small coop of a
- parlor. He was unmarried&mdash;a popular theory in accounting for this
- being that he&rsquo;d been crossed in love in his youth. Besides the parlor,
- Jack&rsquo;s establishment contained only one room, a bedroom it was, a shadow
- larger than the bed.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack himself was wiry and dark, and with a face which, while
- showing marks of former wars, shone the seat of kindly good-humor.
- </p>
- <p>
- There had been an actor, Chanfrau, who played &ldquo;Mose, the Fireman.&rdquo;
- Betelnut Jack resembled in dress his Bowery brother of the stage. His
- soiled silk hat stood on a dresser. He wore a long skirted coat, a red
- shirt, a belt which upheld&mdash;in a manner so absent-minded that one
- feared for the consequences&mdash;his trousers; these latter garments in
- their terminations were tucked inside the gaudy tops of calfskin boots;
- small and wrinkleless these, and fitting like a glove, with the yellow
- seams of the soles each day carefully re-yellowed to the end that they be
- admired of men. Betelnut Jack&rsquo;s dark hair, a shade of gray streaking it in
- places, was crisp and wavy; and a long curl, carefully twisted and oiled,
- was brought down as low as the angle of his jaw just forward of each ear.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Be honest, young man!&rdquo; said Betelnut Jack, at the close of a lecture
- concerning my duties; &ldquo;be honest! But if you must take wrong money, take
- enough each time to pay for the loss of your job. Do you see this?&rdquo; And
- Jack&rsquo;s hand fell on a large morocco-bound copy of &ldquo;Josephus&rdquo; which lay on
- his table. &ldquo;Well, Lorns will tell you what stories I look for in that.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- And Lorns, as we came away, told me. Once a week it was the practice of
- each inspector to split off twenty per cent, of his pillage. He would,
- thus organized, pay a visit to his chief, the worthy Betel-nut Jack. As
- they gossiped, Jack&rsquo;s ever-ready hospitality would cause him to retire for
- a moment to the bedroom in search of a demijohn of personal whisky. While
- alone in the parlor, the visiting inspector would place his contribution
- between the leaves of &ldquo;Josephus,&rdquo; and thereby the humiliating, if not
- dangerous, passage of money from hand to hand was missed.
- </p>
- <p>
- There existed but one further trait of caretaking forethought belonging
- with the worthy Betelnut Jack. It would have come better had others of
- that crooked clique of customs copied Betelnut Jack in this last cautious
- characteristic. Justice is a tortoise, while rascality&rsquo;s a hare; yet
- justice though shod with lead wins ever the race at last. Betelnut Jack
- knew this; and while getting darkly rich with the others, he was always
- ready for the fall. While his comrades drove fast horses, or budded
- brown-stone fronts, or affected extravagant opera and supper afterward
- with those painted lilies, in whose society they delighted, Betelnut Jack
- clung to his old rude Bowery nest of sticks and straws and mud, and lived
- on without a change his Bowery life. He suffered no improvements whether
- of habit or of habitat, and provoked no question-asking by any gilded new
- prosperities of life.
- </p>
- <p>
- As fast as Betelnut Jack got money, he bought United States bonds. With
- each new thousand, he got a new bond, and tucked it safely away among its
- fellows. These pledges of government he kept packed in a small hand-bag;
- this stood at his bed&rsquo;s head, ready for instant flight with him. When the
- downfall did occur, as following sundry years of loot and customs pillage
- was the desperate case, Betelnut Jack with the earliest whisper of peril,
- stepped into his raiment and his calfskin boots, took up his satchel of
- bonds, and with over six hundred thousand dollars of those securities&mdash;enough
- to cushion and make pleasantly sure the balance of his days&mdash;saw the
- last of the Bowery, and was out of the country and into a corner of safety
- as fast as ship might swim.
- </p>
- <p>
- But now you grow impatient; you would hear in more of detail concerning
- what went forward behind the curtains of Customs in those later &rsquo;60&rsquo;s.
- For myself, I may tell of no great personal exploits. I did not remain
- long in revenue service; fear, rather than honesty, forced me to resign;
- and throughout that brief period of my office holding, youth and a lack of
- talent for practical iniquity prevented my main employment in those swart
- transactions which from time to time took place. I was liked, I was
- trusted; I knew what went forward and in the end I had my share of the ill
- profits; but the plans and, usually, the work came from others of a more
- subtile and experienced venality.
- </p>
- <p>
- In this affair of The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars, the story was this. I call them
- The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars because they were of a sort and quality made
- particularly for the then Imperial ruler of the French. They sold at
- retail for one dollar each, were worth, wholesale, seventy dollars a
- hundred, and our aggregate harvest of this one operation was, as I now
- remember, full sixty thousand dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- My first knowledge was when Lorns told me one evening of the seizure&mdash;by
- whom of our circle, and on what ship, I&rsquo;ve now forgotten&mdash;of one
- hundred thousand cigars. They were in proper boxes, concealed I never knew
- how, and captured in the very act of being smuggled and just as they came
- onto our wharf. In designating the seizure, and for reasons which I&rsquo;ve
- given before, they were at once dubbed and ever afterwards known among us
- as The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars.
- </p>
- <p>
- These one hundred thousand cigars were taken to the Customs Depot of
- confiscated goods. The owners, as was our rule, were frightened with black
- pictures of coming prison, and then liberated, never to be seen of us
- again. They were glad enough to win freedom without looking once behind to
- see what became of their captured property.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was one week later when a member of our ring, from poorest tobacco and
- by twenty different makers, caused one hundred thousand cigars, duplicates
- in size and appearance of those Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars, to be manufactured.
- These cost two and one-half cents each; a conscious difference, truly!
- between that and those seventy cents, the wholesale price of our spoil.
- Well, The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars were removed from their boxes and their
- aristocratic places filled by the worthless imitations we had provided.
- Then the boxes were again securely closed; and to look at them no one
- would suspect the important changes which had taken place within.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars once out of their two thousand boxes were carefully
- repacked in certain zinc-lined barrels, and reshipped as &ldquo;notions&rdquo; to
- Havana to one of our folk who went ahead of the consignment to receive
- them. In due course, and in two thousand proper new boxes they again
- appeared in the port of New York; this time they paid their honest duty.
- Also, they had a proper consignment, came to no interrupting griefs; and
- being quickly disposed of, wrought out for us that sixty thousand dollar
- betterment of which I&rsquo;ve spoken.
- </p>
- <p>
- As corollary of this particular informality of The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars, there
- occurred an incident which while grievous to the victims, made no little
- fun for us; its relation here may entertain you, and because of its
- natural connection with the main story, will come properly enough. At set
- intervals, the government held an auction of all confiscated goods. At
- these markets to which the public was invited to appear and bid, the
- government asserted nothing, guaranteed nothing. In disposing of such gear
- as these cigars, no box was opened; no goods displayed. One saw nothing
- but the cover, heard nothing but the surmise of an auctioneer, and
- thereupon, if impulse urged, bid what he pleased for a pig in a poke.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus it came to pass that on the occasion when The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars were
- held aloft for bids, the garrulous lecturer employed in selling the
- collected plunder of three confiscation months, took up one of the two
- thousand boxes as a sample, and said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I offer for sale a lot of two thousand packages, of which the one I hold
- in my hand is a specimen. Each package is supposed to contain fifty
- cigars. What am I bid for the lot? What offer do I hear?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That was the complete proffer as made by the government; for all that the
- bidding was briskly sharp. Those who had come to purchase were there for
- bargains not guarantees; moreover, there was the box; and could they not
- believe their experience? Each would-be bidder knew by the size and shape
- and character of the package that it was made for and should contain fifty
- cigars of the Emperor brand. Wherefore no one distrusted; the question of
- contents arose to no mind; and competition grew instant and close. Bid
- followed bid; five hundred dollars being the mark of each advance, as the
- noisy struggle between speculators for the lot&rsquo;s ownership proceeded.
- </p>
- <p>
- At last those celebrated marketeers, Grove and Filtord, received the lot&mdash;one
- hundred thousand of The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars&mdash;for forty-five thousand
- dollars. What thoughts may have come to them later, when they searched
- their bargain for its merits, I cannot say. Not one word of inquiry,
- condemnation or complaint came from Grove and Filtord. Whatever their
- discoveries, or whatever their deductions, they maintained a profound
- taciturnity. Probably they did not care to court the laughter of fellow
- dealers by disclosures of the trap into which they had so blindly bid
- their way. Surely, they must in its last chapters have been aware of the
- swindle! To have believed in the genuineness of the goods would have
- dissipated what remnant of good repute might still have clung to that last
- of the Napoleons who was their inventor, and justified the coming
- destruction of his throne and the birth of the republic which arose from
- its ruins. As I say, however, not one syllable of complaint came floating
- back from Grove and Filtord. They took their loss, and were dumb.
- </p>
- <p>
- My own pocket was joyfully gorged with much fat advantage of this iniquity&mdash;for
- inside we were like whalers, each having a prearranged per cent, of what
- oil was made, no one working for himself alone&mdash;long prior to that
- bidding which so smote on Grove and Filtord. The ring had no money
- interest in the confiscation sales; those proceeds went all to government.
- We divided the profits of our own disposal of the right true Emperor&rsquo;s
- Cigars on the occasion of their second appearance in port; and that
- business was ended and over and division done sundry weeks prior to the
- Grove and Filtord disaster.
- </p>
- <p>
- That is the story of The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars; there came still one little
- incident, however, which was doubtless the seed of those apprehensions
- which soon drove me to quit the Customs. I had carried his double tithes
- to Betelnut Jack. This was no more the work of policy than right. The
- substitution of the bogus wares, the reshipment to Cuba of The Emperor&rsquo;s
- Cigars, even the zinc-lined barrels, the repackage and second appearance
- and sale of our prizes, were one and all by direction of Betelnut Jack. He
- planned the campaign in each least particular. To him was the credit; and
- to him came the lion&rsquo;s share, as, in good sooth! it should if there be a
- shadow of that honor among rogues whereof the proverb tells.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the evening when I sought Betelnut Jack, we sat and chatted briefly of
- work at the wharfs. Not one word, mind you! escaped from either that might
- intimate aught of customs immorality. That would have been a gross breach
- of the etiquette understood by our flock of customs cormorants. No;
- Betelnut Jack and I confined discussion to transactions absolutely white;
- no other was so much as hinted at.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then came Betelnut Jack&rsquo;s proposal of his special Willow Run; he retired
- in quest of the demijohn; this was my cue to enrich &ldquo;Josephus,&rdquo; ready on
- the dwarf center table to receive the goods. My present to Betelnut Jack
- was five one-hundred-dol-lar bills.
- </p>
- <p>
- Somewhat in haste, I took these from my pocket and opened &ldquo;Josephus&rdquo; to
- lay them between the pages. Any place would do; Betelnut Jack would know
- how to discover the rich bookmark. As I parted the book, my eye was
- arrested by a sentence. As I&rsquo;ve asserted heretofore, I&rsquo;m not
- superstitious; yet that casual sentence seemed alive and to spring upon me
- from out &ldquo;Josephus&rdquo; as a threat:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And these men being thieves were destroyed by the King&rsquo;s laws; and their
- people rended their garments, put on sackcloth, and throwing ashes on
- their heads went about the streets, crying out.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That is what it said; and somehow it made my heart beat quick and little
- like a linnet&rsquo;s heart. I put in my contribution and closed the book. But
- the words clung to me like ivy; I couldn&rsquo;t free myself. In the end, they
- haunted me to my resignation; and while I remained long enough to share in
- the affair of the German Girl&rsquo;s Diamonds, and in that of the Filibusterer,
- when the hand of discovery fell upon Lorns and Quin, and others of my
- one-time comrades, I was far away, facing innocent, if sometimes
- dangerous, problems on our western plains.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;With a profound respect for you,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor to the Sour
- Gentleman when that raconteur had ended, &ldquo;and disavowing a least
- imputation personal to yourself, I must still say that I am amazed by the
- corruption which your tale discloses of things beyond our Customs doors.
- To be sure, you speak of years ago; and yet you leave one to wonder if the
- present be wholly free from taint.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It will be remarkable,&rdquo; returned the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;when any arm of
- government is exerted with entire integrity and no purpose save public
- good, and every thought of private gain eliminated. The world never has
- been so virtuous, nor is it like to become so in your time or mine.
- Government and those offices which, like the works of a watch, are made to
- constitute it, are the production of politics, and politics, mind you, is
- nothing save the collected and harmonised selfishness of men. The fruit is
- seldom better than the tree, and when a source is foul the stream will
- wear a stain.&rdquo; Here the Sour Gentleman sighed as though over the baseness
- of the human race.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;While there&rsquo;s to be no doubt,&rdquo; broke in the Red Nosed Gentleman,
- &ldquo;concerning the corruption existing in politics and the offices and office
- holders bred therefrom, I am free to say that I&rsquo;ve encountered as much
- blackness, and for myself I have been swindled oftener among merchants
- plying their reputable commerce of private scales and counters as in the
- administration of public affairs.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The Red Nosed Gentleman here looked about with a challenging eye as one
- who would note if his observation is to meet with contradiction. Finding
- none, he relapsed into silence and burgundy.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Speakin&rsquo; of politics,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman, who had listened to the
- others as though he found their discourse instructive, &ldquo;it&rsquo;s the one thing
- I&rsquo;ve seen mighty little of. The only occasion on which I finds myse&rsquo;f
- immersed in politics is doorin&rsquo; the brief sojourn I makes in Missouri, an&rsquo;
- when in common with all right-thinkin&rsquo; gents, I whirls in for Old
- Stewart.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Would you mind,&rdquo; remarked the Jolly Doctor in a manner so amiable it left
- one no power to resist, &ldquo;would you mind giving us a glimpse of that
- memorable campaign in which you bore doubtless no inconsiderable part? We
- should have time for it, before we retire.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which the part I bears,&rdquo; responded the Old Cattleman, &ldquo;wouldn&rsquo;t amount to
- the snappin&rsquo; of a cap. As to tellin&rsquo; you-all concernin&rsquo; said outburst of
- pop&rsquo;lar enthoosiasm for Old Stewart, I&rsquo;m plumb willin&rsquo; to go as far as you
- likes.&rdquo; Drawing his chair a bit closer to the fire and seeing to it that a
- glass of Scotch was within the radius of his reach, the Old Cattleman
- began.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0017" id="link2HCH0017"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XVII.&mdash;THE GREAT STEWART CAMPAIGN.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span>s I states, I
- saveys nothin&rsquo; personal of politics. Thar&rsquo;s mighty little politics gets
- brooited about Wolfville, an&rsquo; I ain&rsquo;t none shore but it&rsquo;s as well. The
- camp&rsquo;s most likely a heap peacefuller as a com-moonity. Shore, Colonel
- Sterett discusses politics in that Coyote paper he conducts; but none of
- it&rsquo;s nearer than Washin&rsquo;ton, an&rsquo; it all seems so plumb dreamy an&rsquo; far away
- that while it&rsquo;s interestin&rsquo;, it can&rsquo;t be regyarded as replete of the
- harrowin&rsquo; excitement that sedooces a public from its nacheral rest an&rsquo;
- causes it to set up nights an&rsquo; howl.
- </p>
- <p>
- Rummagin&rsquo; my mem&rsquo;ry, I never does hear any politics talked local but once,
- an&rsquo; that&rsquo;s by Dan Boggs. It&rsquo;s when the Colonel asks Dan to what party he
- adheres in principle&mdash;for thar ain&rsquo;t no real shore-enough party
- lurkin&rsquo; about in Arizona much, it bein&rsquo; a territory that a-way an&rsquo; mighty
- busy over enterprises more calc&rsquo;lated to pay&mdash;an&rsquo; Dan retorts that
- he&rsquo;s hooked up with no outfit none as yet, but stands ready as far as his
- sentiments is involved to go buttin&rsquo; into the first organization that&rsquo;ll
- cheapen nose-paint, &rsquo;liminate splits as a resk in faro-bank, an&rsquo;
- raise the price of beef. Further than them tenets, Dan allows he ain&rsquo;t got
- no principles.
- </p>
- <p>
- Man an&rsquo; boy I never witnesses any surplus of politics an&rsquo; party strife. In
- Tennessee when I&rsquo;m a child every decent gent has been brought up a Andy
- Jackson man, an&rsquo; so continyoos long after that heroic captain is petered.
- As you-all can imagine, politics onder sech conditions goes all one way
- like the currents of the Cumberland. Thar&rsquo;s no bicker, no strife, simply a
- vast Andy Jackson yooniformity.
- </p>
- <p>
- The few years I puts in about Arkansaw ain&rsquo;t much different. Leastwise
- we-all don&rsquo;t have issues; an&rsquo; what contests does arise is gen&rsquo;rally
- personal an&rsquo; of the kind where two gents enjoys a j&rsquo;int debate with their
- bowies or shows each other how wrong they be with a gun. An&rsquo; while
- politics of the variety I deescribes is thrillin&rsquo;, your caution rather
- than your intellects gets appealed to, while feuds is more apt to be their
- frootes than any draw-in&rsquo; of reg&rsquo;lar party lines. Wherefore I may say it&rsquo;s
- only doorin&rsquo; the one year I abides in Missouri when I experiences troo
- politics played with issues, candidates, mass-meetin&rsquo;s an&rsquo; barbecues.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myse&rsquo;f, my part is not spectacyoolar, bein&rsquo; I&rsquo;m new an&rsquo; raw an&rsquo; young;
- but I looks on with relish, an&rsquo; while I don&rsquo;t cut no hercoolean figger in
- the riot, I shore saveys as much about what&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; on as the best posted
- gent between the Ozarks an&rsquo; the Iowa line.
- </p>
- <p>
- What you-all might consider as the better element is painted up to beat
- Old Stewart who&rsquo;s out sloshin&rsquo; about demandin&rsquo; re-election to Jeff City
- for a second term. The better element says Old Stewart drinks. An&rsquo; this
- accoosation is doubtless troo a whole lot, for I&rsquo;m witness myse&rsquo;f to the
- following colloquy which takes place between Old Stewart an&rsquo; a jack-laig
- doctor he crosses up with in St. Joe. Old Stewart&rsquo;s jest come forth from
- the tavern, an&rsquo; bein&rsquo; on a joobilee the evenin&rsquo; before, is lookin&rsquo; an&rsquo;
- mighty likely feelin&rsquo; some seedy.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Doc,&rdquo; says Old Stewart, openin&rsquo; his mouth as wide as a young raven, an&rsquo;
- then shettin&rsquo; it ag&rsquo;in so&rsquo;s to continyoo his remarks, &ldquo;Doc, I wish you&rsquo;d
- peer into this funnel of mine.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then he opens his mouth ag&rsquo;in in the same egree-gious way, while the
- scientist addressed scouts about tharin with his eyes, plenty owley. At
- last the Doc shows symptoms of bein&rsquo; ready to report.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which I don&rsquo;t note nothin&rsquo; onusual, Gov&rsquo;nor, about that mouth,&rdquo; says the
- Doc, &ldquo;except it&rsquo;s a heap voloominous.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Don&rsquo;t you discern no signs or signal smokes of any foreign bodies?&rdquo; says
- Old Stewart, a bit pettish, same as if he can&rsquo;t onderstand sech blindness.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;None whatever!&rdquo; observes the Doc.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s shore strange,&rdquo; retorts Old Stewart, still in his complainin&rsquo; tones;
- &ldquo;thar&rsquo;s two hundred niggers, a brick house an&rsquo; a thousand acres of bottom
- land gone down that throat, an&rsquo; I sort o&rsquo; reckons some traces of &rsquo;em
- would show.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- That&rsquo;s the trouble with Old Stewart from the immacyoolate standpint of the
- better classes; they says he overdrinks. But while it&rsquo;s convincin&rsquo; to
- sooperior folks an&rsquo; ones who&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to church an&rsquo; makin&rsquo; a speshulty of
- it, it don&rsquo;t sep&rsquo;rate Old Stewart from the warm affections of the rooder
- masses&mdash;the catfish an&rsquo; quinine aristocracy that dwells along the
- Missouri; they&rsquo;re out for him to the last sport.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Suppose the old Gov&rsquo;nor does drink,&rdquo; says one, &ldquo;what difference does that
- make? Now, if he&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to try sootes in co&rsquo;t, or assoome the pressure as
- a preacher, thar&rsquo;d be something in the bluff. But it don&rsquo;t cut no figger
- whether a gov&rsquo;nor is sober or no. All he has to do is pardon convicts an&rsquo;
- make notaries public, an&rsquo; no gent can absorb licker s&rsquo;fficient to
- incapac&rsquo;tate him for sech trivial dooties.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- One of the argyments they uses ag&rsquo;in Old Stewart is about a hawg-thief he
- pardons. Old Stewart is headin&rsquo; up for the state house one mornin&rsquo;, when
- he caroms on a passel of felons in striped clothes who&rsquo;s pesterin&rsquo; about
- the grounds, tittivatin&rsquo; up the scenery. Old Stewart pauses in front of
- one of &rsquo;em.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What be you-all in the pen&rsquo;tentiary for?&rdquo; says Old Stewart, an&rsquo; he&rsquo;s
- profoundly solemn.
- </p>
- <p>
- Tharupon the felon trails out on a yarn about how he&rsquo;s a innocent an&rsquo;
- oppressed person. He&rsquo;s that honest an&rsquo; upright&mdash;hear him relate the
- tale&mdash;that you&rsquo;d feel like apol&rsquo;gizin&rsquo;. Old Stewart listens to this
- victim of intrigues an&rsquo; outrages ontil he&rsquo;s through; then he goes
- romancin&rsquo; along to the next. Thar&rsquo;s five wronged gents in that striped
- outfit, five who&rsquo;s as free from moral taint or stain of crime as Dave
- Tutt&rsquo;s infant son, Enright Peets Tutt.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the sixth is different. He admits he&rsquo;s a miscreant an&rsquo; has done stole
- a hawg.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;However did you steal it, you scoundrel?&rdquo; demands Old Stewart.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;m outer meat,&rdquo; says the crim&rsquo;nal, &ldquo;an&rsquo; a band of pigs comes pi rootin&rsquo;
- about, an&rsquo; I nacherally takes my rifle an&rsquo; downs one.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Was it a valyooable hawg?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You-all can gamble it ain&rsquo;t no runt,&rdquo; retorts the crim&rsquo;nal. &ldquo;I shore
- ain&rsquo;t pickin&rsquo; out the worst, an&rsquo; I&rsquo;m as good a jedge of hawgs as ever eats
- corn pone an&rsquo; cracklin&rsquo;.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- At this Old Stewart falls into a foamin&rsquo; rage an&rsquo; turns on the two gyards
- who&rsquo;s soopervisin&rsquo; the captives.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Whatever do you-all mean,&rdquo; he roars, &ldquo;bringin&rsquo; this common an&rsquo; confessed
- hawg-thief out yere with these five honest men? Don&rsquo;t you know he&rsquo;ll
- corrupt &rsquo;em?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Tharupon Old Stewart reepairs to his rooms in the state house an&rsquo; pardons
- the hawg convict with the utmost fury.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; now, pull your freight,&rdquo; says Old Stewart, to the crim&rsquo;nal. &ldquo;If
- you&rsquo;re in Jeff City twenty-four hours from now I&rsquo;ll have you shot at
- sunrise. The idee of compellin&rsquo; five spotless gents to con-tinyoo in daily
- companionship with a low hawg-thief! I pardons you, not because you merits
- mercy, but to preserve the morals of our prison.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The better element concloods they&rsquo;ll take advantage of Old Stewart&rsquo;s
- willin&rsquo;ness for rum an&rsquo; make a example of him before the multitoode. They
- decides they&rsquo;ll construct the example at a monstrous meetin&rsquo; that&rsquo;s
- schedyooled for Hannibal, where Old Stewart an&rsquo; his opponent&mdash;who
- stands for the better element mighty excellent, seein&rsquo; he&rsquo;s worth about a
- million dollars with a home-camp in St. Looey, an&rsquo; never a idee above
- dollars an&rsquo; cents&mdash;is programmed for one of these yere j&rsquo;int debates,
- frequent in the politics of that era. The conspiracy is the more necessary
- as Old Stewart, mental, is so much swifter than the better element&rsquo;s
- candidate, that he goes by him like a antelope. Only two days prior at the
- town of Fulton, Old Stewart comes after the better element&rsquo;s candidate an&rsquo;
- gets enough of his hide, oratorical, to make a saddle-cover. The better
- element, alarmed for their gent, resolves on measures in Hannibal that&rsquo;s
- calc&rsquo;lated to redooce Old Stewart to a shorething. They don&rsquo;t aim to allow
- him to wallop their gent at the Hannibal meetin&rsquo; like he does in old
- Callaway. With that, they confides to a trio of Hannibal&rsquo;s sturdiest sots&mdash;all
- of &rsquo;em acquaintances an&rsquo; pards of Old Stewart&mdash;the sacred task
- of gettin&rsquo; that statesman too drunk to orate.
- </p>
- <p>
- This yere Hannibal barbecue, whereat Old Stewart&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to hold a
- open-air discussion with his aristocratic opponent, is set down for one in
- the afternoon. The three who&rsquo;s to throw Old Stewart with copious libations
- of strong drink, hunts that earnest person out as early as sun-up at the
- tavern. They invites him into the bar-room an&rsquo; bids the bar-keep set forth
- his nourishment.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gents, it works like a charm! All the mornin&rsquo;, Old Stewart swings an&rsquo;
- rattles with the plotters an&rsquo; goes drink for drink with &rsquo;em,
- holdin&rsquo; nothin&rsquo; back.
- </p>
- <p>
- For all that the plot falls down. When it&rsquo;s come the hour for Old Stewart
- to resort to the barbecue an&rsquo; assoome his share in the exercises, two of
- the Hannibal delegation is spread out cold an&rsquo; he&rsquo;pless in a r&rsquo;ar room,
- while Old Stewart is he&rsquo;pin&rsquo; the third&mdash;a gent of whom he&rsquo;s
- partic&rsquo;lar fond&mdash;upstairs to Old Stewart&rsquo;s room, where he lays him
- safe an&rsquo; serene on the blankets. Then Old Stewart takes another drink by
- himse&rsquo;f, an&rsquo; j&rsquo;ins his brave adherents at the picnic grounds. Old Stewart
- is never more loocid, an&rsquo; ag&rsquo;in he peels the pelt from the better
- element&rsquo;s candidate, an&rsquo; does it with graceful ease.
- </p>
- <p>
- Old Stewart, however, is regyarded as in peril of defeat. He&rsquo;s mighty weak
- in the big towns where the better element is entrenched, an&rsquo; churches grow
- as thick as blackberries. Even throughout the rooral regions, wherever a
- meetin&rsquo; house pokes up its spire, it&rsquo;s onderstood that Old Stewart&rsquo;s in a
- heap of danger.
- </p>
- <p>
- It ain&rsquo;t that Old Stewart is sech a apostle of nose-paint neither; it
- ain&rsquo;t whiskey that&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to kill him off at the ballot box. It&rsquo;s the
- fact that the better element&rsquo;s candidate&mdash;besides bein&rsquo; rich, which
- is allers a mark of virchoo to a troo believer&mdash;is a church member,
- an&rsquo; belongs to a congregation where he passes the plate, an&rsquo; stands high
- up in the papers. This makes the better element&rsquo;s gent a heap pop&rsquo;lar with
- church folk, while pore Old Stewart, who&rsquo;s a hopeless sinner, don&rsquo;t stand
- no show.
- </p>
- <p>
- This grows so manifest that even Old Stewart&rsquo;s most locoed supporters
- concedes that he&rsquo;s gone; an&rsquo; money is offered at three to one that the
- better element&rsquo;s entry will go over Old Stewart like a Joone rise over a
- tow-head. Old Stewart hears these yere misgivin&rsquo;s an&rsquo; bids his folks be of
- good cheer.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll fix that,&rdquo; says Old Stewart. &ldquo;By election day, my learned opponent
- will be in sech disrepoote with every church in Missouri he won&rsquo;t be able
- to get dost enough to one of &rsquo;em to give it a ripe peach.&rdquo; Old
- Stewart onpouches a roll which musters fifteen hundred dollars. &ldquo;That&rsquo;s
- mighty little; but it&rsquo;ll do the trick.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Old Stewart&rsquo;s folks is mystified; they can&rsquo;t make out how he&rsquo;s goin&rsquo; to
- round up the congregations with so slim a workin&rsquo; cap&rsquo;tal. But they has
- faith in their chief; an&rsquo; his word goes for all they&rsquo;ve got. When he lets
- on he&rsquo;ll have the churches arrayed ag&rsquo;inst the foe, his warriors takes
- heart of grace an&rsquo; jumps into the collar an&rsquo; pulls like lions refreshed.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the fourth Sunday before election when Old Stewart, by speshul an&rsquo;
- trusted friends presents five hundred dollars each to a church in St.
- Looey, an&rsquo; another in St. Joe, an&rsquo; still another in Hannibal; said gifts
- bein&rsquo; in the name an&rsquo; with the compliments of his opponent an&rsquo; that gent&rsquo;s
- best wishes for the Christian cause.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thar&rsquo;s not a doubt raised; each church believes it-se&rsquo;f favored five
- hundred dollars&rsquo; worth from the kindly hand of the millionaire candidate,
- an&rsquo; the three pastors sits pleasantly down an&rsquo; writes that amazed sport a
- letter of thanks for his moonificence. He don&rsquo;t onderstand it none; but he
- decides it&rsquo;s wise to accept this accidental pop&rsquo;larity, an&rsquo; he waxes
- guileful an&rsquo; writes back an&rsquo; says that while he don&rsquo;t clearly onderstand,
- an&rsquo; no thanks is his doo, he&rsquo;s tickled to hear he&rsquo;s well bethought of by
- the good Christians of St. Looey, St. Joe an&rsquo; Hannibal, as expressed in
- them missives. The better element&rsquo;s candidate congratulates himse&rsquo;f on his
- good luck, stands pat, an&rsquo; accepts his onexpected wreaths. That&rsquo;s jest
- what Old Stewart, who is as cunnin&rsquo; as a fox, is aimin&rsquo; at.
- </p>
- <p>
- In two days the renown of them five-hundred-dollar gifts goes over the
- state like a cat over a back roof. In four days every church in the state
- hears of these largesses. An&rsquo; bein&rsquo; plumb alert financial, as churches
- ever is, each sacred outfit writes on to the better element&rsquo;s candidate
- an&rsquo; desires five hundred dollars of that onfortunate publicist. He gets
- sixty thousand letters in one week an&rsquo; each calls for five hundred.
- </p>
- <p>
- Gents, thar&rsquo;s no more to be said; the better element&rsquo;s candidate is up
- ag&rsquo;inst it. He can&rsquo;t yield to the fiscal demands, an&rsquo; it&rsquo;s too late to
- deny the gifts. Whereupon the other churches resents the favoritism he&rsquo;s
- displayed about the three in St. Looey, St. Joe an&rsquo; Hannibal. They
- regyards him as a hoss-thief for not rememberin&rsquo; them while his weaselskin
- is in his hand, an&rsquo; on election day they comes down on him like a pan of
- milk from a top shelf! You hear me, they shorely blots that onhap-py
- candidate off the face of the earth, an&rsquo; Old Stewart is Gov&rsquo;nor ag&rsquo;in.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the fourth evening of our companionship about the tavern fire, it was
- the Red Nosed Gentleman who took the lead with a story.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You spoke,&rdquo; said the Red Nosed Gentleman, addressing the Jolly Doctor,
- &ldquo;of having been told by a friend a story you gave us. Not long ago I was
- in the audience while an old actor recounted how he once went to the aid
- of an individual named Connelly. It was not a bad story, I thought; and if
- you like, I&rsquo;ll tell it to-night. The gray Thespian called his adventure
- The Rescue of Connelly, and these were his words as he related it. We were
- about a table in Browne&rsquo;s chop house when he told it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0018" id="link2HCH0018"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XVIII.&mdash;THE RESCUE OF CONNELLY.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">E</span>quipped as we are
- for the conquest of comfort with fresh pipes, full mugs, and the flavor of
- a best of suppers still extant within our mouths, it may be an
- impertinence for one to moralize. And yet, as I go forward to this
- incident, I will premise that, in every least exigency of life, ill begets
- ill, while good springs from good and follows the doer with a profit. Such
- has been my belief; such, indeed, has been my unbroken experience; and the
- misfortunes of Connelly, and my relief of them, small matters in
- themselves, are in proof of what I say.
- </p>
- <p>
- At sixty I look back with envy on that decade which followed my issuing
- forth from Trinity College, when, hopeless, careless, purposeless beyond
- the moment, I wandered the face of the earth and fed or starved at the
- hands of chance-born opportunity. I was up or down or rich or poor, and,
- with an existence which ran from wine to ditch water and back again to
- wine, was happy. I recall how in those days of checkered fortune, wherein
- there came a proportion of one hour of shadow to one moment of sun, I was
- wont to think on riches and their possession. I would say to myself: &ldquo;And
- should it so befall that I make my millions, I&rsquo;ll have none about me but
- broken folk: I&rsquo;ll refuse to so much as permit the acquaintance of a rich
- man.&rdquo; I&rsquo;ve been ever deeply controlled by the sentiment therein expressed.
- Sure it is, I&rsquo;ve been incapable of the example of the Levite, and could
- never keep to the other side of the way when distress appealed.
- </p>
- <p>
- My youth was wild, and staid folk called it &ldquo;vicious.&rdquo; I squandered my
- fortune; melted it, as August melteth ice, while still at Trinity. It was
- my misfortune to reach my majority before I reached my graduation, and
- those two college years which ensued after I might legally write myself
- &ldquo;man&rdquo; and the wild days that filled them up, brought me to face the world
- with no more shillings than might take me to Australia. However, they were
- gay though graceless times&mdash;those college years; and Dublin, from
- Smock Alley to Sackville Street, may still remember them.
- </p>
- <p>
- Those ten years after quitting Dublin were years of hit or miss. I did
- everything but preach or steal. Yes, I even fought three prize-fights; and
- there were warped, distorted moments when, bloody but victorious, I
- believed it better to be a fighter than to be a bishop.
- </p>
- <p>
- But for the main, I drifted to the theaters and lived by the drama.
- Doubtless I was a wretched actor&mdash;albeit I felt myself a Kemble&mdash;but
- the stage was so far good to me it finally brought me&mdash;as an
- underling of much inconsequence&mdash;to the fair city of New York. I did
- but little for the drama, but it did much for me; it led me to America.
- And now that I&rsquo;ve come to New York in this story, I&rsquo;ve come to Connelly.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mayhap I had been in New York three weeks. It was a chill night in April,
- and I was going down Broadway and thinking on bed; for, having done
- nothing all day save run about, I was very tired. It was under the lamps
- at the corner of Twenty-ninth Street, that I first beheld Connelly. Thin
- of face as of coat, he stood shivering in the keen air. There was
- something so beaten in the pose of the sorrowful figure that I was brought
- to a full stop.
- </p>
- <p>
- As strange to the land and its courtesies as I was to Connelly, I
- hesitated for a moment to speak. I was loth to be looked upon as one who,
- from a motive of curiosity, would insult another in bad luck. But I took
- courage from my virtue and at last made bold to accost him:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why do you stand shivering here?&rdquo; I said. &ldquo;Why don&rsquo;t you go home?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s a boarding-house,&rdquo; said Connelly. &ldquo;I owe the old lady thirty dollars
- and if I go back she&rsquo;ll hold me prisoner for it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then he told me his name, and that the trouble with him came from too much
- rum. Connelly had a Dublin accent and it won on me; moreover, I also had
- had troubles traceable to rum.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Come home,&rdquo; I said; &ldquo;you can&rsquo;t stand here all night. Come home; I&rsquo;ll go
- with you and have a talk with the old lady myself. Perhaps I&rsquo;ll find a way
- to soften her or make her see reason.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;She&rsquo;s incapable of seeing reason,&rdquo; said Connelly; &ldquo;incapable of seeing
- anything save money. She understands nothing but gold. She&rsquo;ll hold me
- captive a week; then if I don&rsquo;t pay, she&rsquo;ll have me arrested. You don&rsquo;t
- know the &lsquo;old lady:&rsquo; she&rsquo;s a demon unless she&rsquo;s paid.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- However, I led Connelly over to Sixth Avenue and restored his optimism
- with strong drink. Then I bought a quart of whiskey; thus sustained,
- Connelly summoned courage and together we sought his quarters. In his
- little room we sat all night, discussing the whiskey and Dublin and
- Connelly&rsquo;s hard fate.
- </p>
- <p>
- With the morning I was presented to the &ldquo;old lady,&rdquo;&mdash;an honor to make
- one quake. When I reviewed her acrid features, I knew that Connelly was
- right. Nothing could move that stony heart but money. I put off,
- therefore, those gallantries and blandishments I might otherwise have
- introduced, and came at once to the question.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How much does Connelly owe?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thirty dollars!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The words were emphasized with a click of teeth that would have done
- credit to a rat-trap.
- </p>
- <p>
- There was a baleful gleam, too, in the jadestone eye. Clearly, Connelly
- had read the signs aright. He might regard himself as a prisoner until the
- &ldquo;old lady&rdquo; was paid.
- </p>
- <p>
- That iron landlady went away to her duties and I counted my fortunes. They
- assembled but twenty-four dollars&mdash;a slim force and not one wherewith
- to storm the citadel of Connelly&rsquo;s troubles. How should I augment my
- capital? I knew of but one quick method and that flowed with risks&mdash;it
- was the races.
- </p>
- <p>
- I turned naturally to the horses, for it was those continuous efforts
- which I put forth to name winners that had so dissipated my patrimony.
- About the time I might have selected a victor now and then, my wealth was
- departed away. It is always thus. Sinister yet satirical paradox! the best
- judges of racing have ever the least money!
- </p>
- <p>
- There was no new way open to me, however, in this instance of Connelly. I
- must pay his debt that day if I would redeem him from this Bastile of a
- boarding-house, and the races were my single chance. I explained to
- Connelly; obtained him the consolation of a second quart wherewith to cure
- the sharper cares of his bondage, and started for the race-course. I knew
- nothing of American horses and less of American tracks, but I held not
- back for that. In the transaction of a work of virtue I would trust to
- lucky stars.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I approached the race-course gates, my eyes were pleased with the
- vision of that excellent pugilist, Joe Coburn. I had known this unworthy
- in Melbourne; he had graced the ringside on those bustling occasions when
- I pulled shirt over head and held up my hands for the stakes and the honor
- of old Ireland. Grown too fat for fisticuffs, Coburn struggled with the
- races for his daily bread. As he was very wise of horses, and likewise
- very crooked, I bethought me that Coburn&rsquo;s advice might do me good. If
- there were a trap set, Coburn should know; and he might aid a former
- fellow-gladiator to have advantage thereof and show the road to riches.
- </p>
- <p>
- Are races ever crooked? Man! I whiles wonder at the age&rsquo;s ignorance!
- Crooked? Indubitably crooked. There was never rascal like your rascal of
- sport; there&rsquo;s that in the word to disintegrate integrity. I make no doubt
- it was thus in every time and clime and that even the Olympian games
- themselves were honeycombed with fraud, and the sacred Altis wherein they
- were celebrated a mere hotbed of robbery. However, to regather with the
- doubtful though sapient Coburn.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Who&rsquo;s to win the first race?&rdquo; I asked.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Play Blue Bells!&rdquo; and Coburn looked at me hard and as one who held
- mysterious knowledge.
- </p>
- <p>
- Blue Bells!&mdash;I put a cautious five-dollar piece on Blue Bells. I saw
- her at the start. Vilest of beasts, she never finished&mdash;never met my
- eye again. I asked someone what had become of her. He said that, taking
- advantage of sundry missing boards over on the back-stretch, Blue Bells
- had bolted and gone out through the fence. This may have been fact or it
- may have been sarcasmal fiction; the truth important is, I lost my wager.
- </p>
- <p>
- Still true to a first impression&mdash;though I confess to confidence a
- trifle shaken&mdash;I again sought Coburn.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That was a great tip you gave me!&rdquo; I said. &ldquo;That suggestion of Blue Bells
- was a marvel! What do you pick for the next?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Get Tambourine!&rdquo; retorted Coburn. &ldquo;It&rsquo;s a sure thing.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Another five I placed on Tambourine; not without misgivings. But what
- might I do better? My judgment was worthless where I did not know one
- horse from another. I might as well take Coburn&rsquo;s advice; the more since
- he went often wrong and might name a winner by mistake. Five, therefore,
- on Tambourine; and when he started my hopes and Connelly&mdash;whose
- consoling quart must be a pint by now&mdash;went with him.
- </p>
- <p>
- At the worst I may so far compliment Tambourine as to say that I saw him
- again. He finished far in the rear; but at least he had the honesty to go
- around the course. Yet it was five dollars lost. When Tambourine went back
- to his stable, my capital was reduced by half, and Connelly and liberty as
- far apart as when we started.
- </p>
- <p>
- Following the disaster of Tambourine I sought no more the Coburn. Clearly
- it was not that philosopher&rsquo;s afternoon for naming winners. Or if it were,
- he was keeping their names a secret.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus ruminating, I sat reading the race card, when of a blinking sudden my
- eye was caught by the words &ldquo;Bill Breen.&rdquo; The title seemed a suggestion.
- Bill Breen had been my roommate&mdash;my best friend in the days of old
- Trinity. I pondered the coincidence.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;If this Bill Breen,&rdquo; I reflected, &ldquo;is half as fast as my Bill Breen, he&rsquo;s
- fit to carry Cæsar and his fortunes.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The more I considered, the more I was impressed. It was like sinking in a
- quicksand. In the end I was caught. I waxed reckless and placed ten
- dollars&mdash;fairly my residue of riches&mdash;on Bill Breen in one of
- those old-fashioned French Mutual pools common of that hour; having done
- so, I crept away to a lonesome seat in the grandstand and trembled. It was
- now or never, and Bill Breen would race freighted with the fate of
- Connelly.
- </p>
- <p>
- About two seats to my right, and with no one between, sat a round, bloated
- body of a man. He looked so much like a pig that, had he been put in a
- sty, you would have had nothing save the fact that he wore a hat to
- distinguish him from the other inmates. And yet I could tell by the mien
- of him, and his airs of lofty isolation and superiority, that he knew all
- about a horse&mdash;knew so much more than common folk that he despised
- them and withdrew from their society. It was like tempting the skies to
- speak to him, so wrapped was he in the dignity of his vast knowledge, but
- my quaking solicitude over Bill Breen and the awful stakes he ran for in
- poor Connelly&rsquo;s evil case, emboldened me. With a look, deprecatory at once
- and apologetic, I turned to this oracle:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Do you know a horse named Bill Breen?&rdquo; I asked.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I do,&rdquo; he replied coldly. Then ungrammatically: &ldquo;That&rsquo;s him walking down
- the track to the scales for the &lsquo;jock&rsquo; to weigh in,&rdquo; and he pointed to a
- greyhound-shaped chestnut.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Can he race?&rdquo; I said, with a gingerly air of merest curiosity.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He can race, but he won&rsquo;t,&rdquo; and the swinish man twined the huge gold
- chain about his right fore-hoof. &ldquo;I lost fifty dollars on him Choosday.
- The horse can race, but he won&rsquo;t; he&rsquo;s crazy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He looks well,&rdquo; I observed timidly.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Sure! he looks well,&rdquo; assented the swinish one; &ldquo;but never mind his
- looks; he won&rsquo;t win.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then came the start and the horses got away on the first trial. They went
- off in a bunch, and it gave me some color of satisfaction to note Bill
- Breen well to the front.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He has a good start,&rdquo; I ventured.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Hang the start!&rdquo; derided the swinish one.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He won&rsquo;t win, I tell you; he&rsquo;ll go and jump over the fence and never come
- back.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As the horses went from the quarter to the half mile post, Bill Breen,
- running easily, was strongly in the lead and increasing. My blood began to
- tingle.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;He&rsquo;s ahead at the half mile.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And what of it?&rdquo; retorted the swinish one, disgustedly. &ldquo;Now keep your
- eye on him. In ten seconds he&rsquo;ll fly up in the air and stay there. He
- won&rsquo;t win; the horse is crazy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As the field swung into the homestretch and each jockey picked his route
- for the run to the wire, Bill Breen was going like a bird, twenty yards to
- the good if a foot. The swinish one placed the heavy member that had been
- caressing the watch-chain on my shoulder. He did not wait for any comment
- from me.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Sit still,&rdquo; he howled; &ldquo;sit still. He won&rsquo;t win. If he can&rsquo;t lose any
- other way, he&rsquo;ll stop back beyant on the stretch and bite the boy off his
- back. That&rsquo;s what he&rsquo;ll do; he&rsquo;ll bite the jockey off his back.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- To this last assurance, delivered with a roar, I made no answer. The
- horses were coming like a whirlwind; riders lashing, nostrils straining.
- The roll of the hoofs put my heart to a sympathetic gallop. I could not
- have said a word if I had tried. With the grandstand in a tumult, the
- horses flashed under the wire, Bill Breen winner with a flourish by a
- dozen lengths.
- </p>
- <p>
- Connelly was saved.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the horses were being dismissed, and &ldquo;Bill Breen&rdquo; was hung from the
- judges&rsquo; stand as &ldquo;first,&rdquo; the swinish one contemplated me gravely and in
- silence.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Have you a ticket on him?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I have,&rdquo; I replied.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Then you&rsquo;ll win a million dollars.&rdquo; This with a toss as he arose to go.
- &ldquo;You&rsquo;ll win a million dollars. You&rsquo;re the only fool who has.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s like the stories you read. The swinish one was so nearly correct in
- his last remark that I found but two tickets besides my own on Bill Breen.
- It has the ring of fable, but I was richer by eleven hundred and
- thirty-two dollars when that race was over. Blue Bells and Tambourine were
- forgotten; Bill Breen had redeemed the day! It was pleasant when I had
- cashed my ticket to observe me go about recovering the lost Connelly.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now, there,&rdquo; cried the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;there is a story which tells of a
- joy your rich man never knows&mdash;the joy of being rescued from a money
- difficulty.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And do you think a rich man is for that unlucky?&rdquo; asked the Sour
- Gentleman.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Verily, do I,&rdquo; returned the Jolly Doctor, earnestly. &ldquo;I can conceive of
- nothing more dreary than endless riches&mdash;the wealth that is by the
- cradle&mdash;that from birth to death is as easy to one&rsquo;s hand as water.
- How should he know the sweet who has not known the bitter? Man! the thorn
- is ever the charm of the rose.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was discovered in the chat which followed the Red Nosed Gentleman&rsquo;s
- tale that Sioux Sam might properly be regarded as the one who should next
- take up the burden of the company&rsquo;s entertainment. It stood a gratifying
- characteristic of our comrade from the Yellowstone that he was not once
- found to dispute the common wish. He never proffered a story; but he
- promptly told one when asked to do so. He was taciturn, but he was no less
- ready for that, and the moment his name was called he proceeded with the
- fable of &ldquo;Moh-Kwa and the Three Gifts.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0019" id="link2HCH0019"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XIX.&mdash;MOH-KWA AND THE THREE GIFTS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>his is in the long
- time ago when the sun is younger an&rsquo; not so big an&rsquo; hot as now, an&rsquo;
- Kwa-Sind, the Strong Man, is a chief of the Upper Yellowstone Sioux. It is
- on a day in the Moon-of-the-first-frost an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, is
- gathering black-berries an&rsquo; filling his mouth. As Moh-Kwa pulls the bush
- towards him, he pierces his paw with a great thorn so that it makes him
- howl an&rsquo; shout, for much is his rage an&rsquo; pain. Moh-Kwa cannot get the
- great thorn out; because Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s claws while sharp an&rsquo; strong are not
- fingers to pull out a thorn; an&rsquo; the more Moh-Kwa bites his paw to get at
- the thorn, the further he pushes it in. At last Moh-Kwa sits growling an&rsquo;
- looking at the thorn an&rsquo; wondering what he is to do.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0013" id="linkimage-0013"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0295.jpg" alt="0295 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0295.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- While Moh-Kwa is wondering an&rsquo; growling, there comes walking Shaw-shaw,
- the Swallow, who is a young man of the Sioux. The Swallow has a good
- heart; but his spirit is light an&rsquo; his nature as easily blown about on
- each new wind as a dead leaf. So the Sioux have no respect for the Swallow
- but laugh when he comes among them, an&rsquo; some even call him
- Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward, for they do not look close, an&rsquo; mistake
- lightness for fear.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Swallow came near, Moh-Kwa, still growling, held forth his paw
- an&rsquo; showed the Swallow how the thorn was buried in the big pad so that he
- could not bite it out an&rsquo; only made it go deeper. An&rsquo; with that the
- Swallow, who had a good heart, took Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s big paw between his knees
- an&rsquo; pulled out the great thorn; for the Swallow had fingers an&rsquo; not claws
- like Moh-Kwa, an&rsquo; the Swallow&rsquo;s fingers were deft an&rsquo; nimble to do any
- desired deed.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa felt the relief of that great thorn out of his paw, he was
- grateful to the Swallow an&rsquo; thought to do him a favor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You are laughed at,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa to the Swallow, &ldquo;because your spirit is
- light as dead leaves an&rsquo; too much blown about like a tumbleweed wasting
- its seeds in foolish travelings to go nowhere for no purpose so that only
- it goes. Your heart is good, but your work is of no consequence, an&rsquo; your
- name will win no respect; an&rsquo; with years you will be hated since you will
- do no great deeds. Already men call you Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward. I am
- Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear of the Yellowstone, an&rsquo; I would do you a favor for
- taking my paw an&rsquo; the thorn apart. But I cannot change your nature; only
- Pau-guk, the Death, can do that; an&rsquo; no man may touch Pau-guk an&rsquo; live.
- Yet for a favor I will give you three gifts, which if you keep safe will
- make you rich an&rsquo; strong an&rsquo; happy; an&rsquo; all men will love you an&rsquo; no
- longer think to call you Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa when he had ended this long talk, licked his paw where had been
- the great thorn, an&rsquo; now that the smart was gone an&rsquo; he could put his foot
- to the ground an&rsquo; not howl, he took the Swallow an&rsquo; carried him to his
- house in the rocks. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa gave the Swallow a knife, a necklace of
- bear-claws, an&rsquo; a buffalo robe.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;While you carry the knife,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;all men will respect an&rsquo; fear
- you an&rsquo; the squaws will cherish you in their hearts. While you wear the
- bear-claws, you will be brave an&rsquo; strong, an&rsquo; whatever you want you will
- get. As for the skin of the buffalo, it is big medicine, an&rsquo; if you sit
- upon it an&rsquo; wish, it will carry you wherever you ask to go.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Besides the knife, the bear-claws an&rsquo; the big medicine robe, Moh-Kwa gave
- the Swallow the thorn he had pulled from his foot, telling him to sew it
- in his moccasin, an&rsquo; when he was in trouble it would bring Moh-Kwa to him
- to be a help. Also, Moh-Kwa warned the Swallow to beware of a cunning
- squaw.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;For,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;your nature is light like dead leaves, an&rsquo; such as
- you seek ever to be a fool about a cunning squaw.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Swallow came again among the Sioux he wore the knife an&rsquo; the
- bear-claws that Moh-Kwa had given him; an&rsquo; in his lodge he spread the big
- medicine robe. An&rsquo; because of the knife an&rsquo; the bear-claws, the warriors
- respected an&rsquo; feared him, an&rsquo; the squaws loved him in their hearts an&rsquo;
- followed where he went with their eyes. Also, when he wanted anything, the
- Swallow ever got it; an&rsquo; as he was swift an&rsquo; ready to want things, the
- Swallow grew quickly rich among the Sioux, an&rsquo; his lodge was full of robes
- an&rsquo; furs an&rsquo; weapons an&rsquo; new dresses of skins an&rsquo; feathers, while more
- than fifty ponies ate the grass about it.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now, this made Kwa-Sind, the Strong Man, angry in his soul&rsquo;s soul; for
- Kwa-Sind was a mighty Sioux, an&rsquo; had killed a Pawnee for each of his
- fingers, an&rsquo; a Blackfoot an&rsquo; a Crow for each of his toes, an&rsquo; it made his
- breast sore to see the Swallow, who had been also called Shau-goh-dah-wah,
- the Coward, thought higher among the Sioux an&rsquo; be a richer man than
- himself. Yet Kwa-Sind was afraid to kill the Swallow lest the Sioux who
- now sung the Swallow&rsquo;s praises should rise against him for revenge.
- </p>
- <p>
- Kwa-Sind told his hate to Wah-bee-noh, who was a medicine man an&rsquo; juggler,
- an&rsquo; agreed that he would give Wah-bee-noh twenty ponies to make the
- Swallow again as he was so that the Sioux would laugh at him an&rsquo; call him
- Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward.
- </p>
- <p>
- Wah-bee-noh, the medicine man, was glad to hear the offer of Kwa-Sind, for
- he was a miser an&rsquo; thought only how he might add another pony to his herd.
- Wah-bee-noh told Kwa-Sind he would surely do as he asked, an&rsquo; that the
- Swallow within three moons would be despised among all the Sioux.
- </p>
- <p>
- Wah-bee-noh went to his lodge an&rsquo; made his strongest medicine an&rsquo; called
- Jee-bi, the Spirit. An&rsquo; Jee-bi, the Spirit, told Wah-bee-noh of the
- Swallow&rsquo;s knife an&rsquo; bear-claws an&rsquo; the medicine robe.
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; now Wah-bee-noh made a plan an&rsquo; gave it to his daughter who was called
- Oh-pee-chee, the Robin, to carry out; for the Robin was full of craft an&rsquo;
- cunning, an&rsquo; moreover, beautiful among the young girls of the Sioux.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Robin dressed herself until she was like the red bird; an&rsquo; then she
- walked up an&rsquo; down in front of the lodge of the Swallow. An&rsquo; when the
- Swallow saw her, his nature which was light as dead leaves at once became
- drawn to the Robin, an&rsquo; the Swallow laughed an&rsquo; made a place by his side
- for the Robin to sit down. With that the Robin came an&rsquo; sat by his side;
- an&rsquo; after a little she sang to him Ewah-yeah, the Sleep-song, an&rsquo; the
- Swallow was overcome; his eyes closed an&rsquo; slumber settled down upon him
- like a night-fog.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then the Robin stole the knife from its sheath an&rsquo; the bear-claws from
- about the neck of the Swallow; but the medicine robe the Robin could not
- get because the Swallow was asleep upon it, an&rsquo; if she pulled it from
- beneath him he would wake up.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Robin took the knife an&rsquo; the bear-claws an&rsquo; carried them to
- Wah-bee-noh, her father, who got twelve ponies from Kwa-Sind for them an&rsquo;
- added the ponies to his herd. An&rsquo; the heart of Wah-bee-noh danced the
- miser&rsquo;s dance of gain in his bosom from mere gladness; an&rsquo; because he
- would have eight more ponies from Kwa-Sind, he sent the Robin back to
- steal the medicine robe when the Swallow should wake up.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Robin went back, an&rsquo; finding the Swallow still asleep on the medicine
- robe, lay down by his side; an&rsquo; soon she too fell asleep, for the Robin
- was a very tired squaw since to be cunning an&rsquo; full of craft is hard work
- an&rsquo; soon wearies one.
- </p>
- <p>
- When the Swallow woke up he missed his knife an&rsquo; bear-claws. Also, he
- remembered that Moh-Kwa had warned him for the lightness of his spirit to
- beware of a cunning squaw. When these thoughts came to the Swallow, an&rsquo;
- seeing the Robin still sleeping by his side, he knew well that she had
- stolen his knife an&rsquo; bear-claws.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now, the Swallow fell into a great anger an&rsquo; thought an&rsquo; thought what he
- should do to make the Robin return the knife an&rsquo; bear-claws she had
- stolen. Without them the Sioux would laugh at him an&rsquo; despise him as
- before, an&rsquo; many would again call him Shau-goh-dah-wah, the Coward, an&rsquo;
- the name bit into the Swallow&rsquo;s heart like a rattlesnake an&rsquo; poisoned it
- with much grief.
- </p>
- <p>
- While the Swallow thought an&rsquo; the Robin still lay sleeping, a plan came to
- him; an&rsquo; with that, the Swallow seeing he was with the Robin lying on the
- medicine robe, sat up an&rsquo; wished that both himself an&rsquo; the Robin were in a
- far land of rocks an&rsquo; sand where a great pack of wolves lived.
- </p>
- <p>
- Like the flash an&rsquo; the flight of an arrow, the Swallow with the Robin
- still asleep by his side, an&rsquo; with the medicine robe still beneath them on
- the ground, found himself in a desolate land of rocks an&rsquo; sands, an&rsquo; all
- about him came a band of wolves who yelped an&rsquo; showed their teeth with the
- hunger that gnawed their flanks.
- </p>
- <p>
- Because the wolves yelped, the Robin waked up; an&rsquo; when she saw their
- white teeth shining with hunger she fell down from a big fear an&rsquo; cried
- an&rsquo; twisted one hand with the other, thinking Pau-guk, the Death, was on
- his way to get her. The Robin wept an&rsquo; turned to the Swallow an&rsquo; begged
- him to put her back before the lodge of Wah-bee-noh, her father.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the Swallow, with the anger of him who is robbed, spoke hard words out
- of his mouth.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Give me back the knife an&rsquo; the bear-claws you have stolen. You are a bad
- squaw, full of cunning an&rsquo; very crafty; but here I shall keep you an&rsquo; feed
- you&mdash;legs an&rsquo; arms an&rsquo; head an&rsquo; body&mdash;to my wolf-friends who
- yelp an&rsquo; show their teeth out yonder, unless I have my knife an&rsquo;
- bear-claws again.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- This brought more fear on the Robin, an&rsquo; she felt that the Swallow&rsquo;s words
- were as a shout for Pau-guk, the Death, to make haste an&rsquo; claim her; yet
- her cunning was not stampeded but stood firm in her heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Robin said that the Swallow must give her time to grow calm an&rsquo; then
- she would find the knife an&rsquo; bear-claws for him. While the Swallow waited,
- the Robin still wept an&rsquo; sobbed for fear of the white teeth of the wolves
- who stood in a circle about them. But little by little, the crafty Robin
- turned her sobs softly into Ewah-yeah, the Sleep-song; an&rsquo; soon slumber
- again tied the hands an&rsquo; feet an&rsquo; stole the eyes of the Swallow.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now the Robin did not hesitate. She tore the big medicine robe from
- beneath the Swallow; throwing herself into its folds, the Robin wished
- herself again before Wah-bee-noh&rsquo;s lodge, an&rsquo; with that the robe rushed
- with her away across the skies like the swoop of a hawk. The Swallow was
- only awake in time to see the Robin go out of sight like a bee hunting its
- hive.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now the Swallow was so cast down with shame that he thought he would call
- Pau-guk, the Death, an&rsquo; give himself to the wolves who sat watching with
- their hungry eyes. But soon his heart came back, an&rsquo; his spirit which was
- light as dead leaves, stirred about hopefully in his bosom.
- </p>
- <p>
- While he considered what he should now do, helpless an&rsquo; hungry, in this
- desolate stretch of rocks an&rsquo; sand an&rsquo; no water, the thorn which had been
- in Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s paw pricked his foot where it lay sewed in his moccasin. With
- that the Swallow wished he might only see the Wise Bear to tell him his
- troubles.
- </p>
- <p>
- As the Swallow made this wish, an&rsquo; as if to answer it, he saw Moh-Kwa
- coming across the rocks an&rsquo; the sand. When the wolves saw Moh-Kwa, they
- gave a last howl an&rsquo; ran for their hiding places.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa himself said nothing when he came up, an&rsquo; the Swallow spoke not
- for shame but lay quiet while Moh-Kwa took him by the belt which was about
- his middle an&rsquo; throwing him over his shoulder as if the Swallow were a
- dead deer, galloped off like the wind for his own house.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Moh-Kwa had reached his house, he gave the Swallow a piece of buffalo
- meat to eat. Then Moh-Kwa said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Because you would be a fool over a beautiful squaw who was cunning, you
- have lost my three gifts that were your fortune an&rsquo; good fame. Still,
- because you were only a fool, I will get them back for you. You must stay
- here, for you cannot help since your spirit is as light as dead leaves,
- an&rsquo; would not be steady for so long a trail an&rsquo; one which calls for so
- much care to follow.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Moh-Kwa went to the door of his house an&rsquo; called his three friends,
- Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, Sub-bee-kah-shee, the Spider, an&rsquo;
- Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly; an&rsquo; to these he said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Because you are great warriors an&rsquo; fear nothing in your hearts I have
- called you.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; at that, Wah-wah-tah-see, an&rsquo; Sub-bee-kah-shee, an&rsquo; Sug-gee-mah stood
- very straight an&rsquo; high, for being little men it made them proud because so
- big a bear as Moh-Kwa had called them to be his help.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To you, Sub-bee-kah-shee,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, turning to the Spider, &ldquo;I leave
- Kwa-Sind; to you, Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, falls the honor of slaying
- Wah-bee-noh, the bad medicine man; while unto you, Sug-gee-mah descends
- the hardest task, for you must fight a great battle with Nee-pah-win, the
- Sleep.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa gave his orders to his three friends; an&rsquo; with that
- Sub-bee-kah-shee, crept to the side of Kwa-Sind where he slept an&rsquo; bit him
- on the cheek; an&rsquo; Kwa-Sind turned first gray an&rsquo; then black with the
- spider&rsquo;s venom, an&rsquo; then died in the hands of Pau-guk, the Death, who had
- followed the Spider to Kwa-Sind&rsquo;s lodge.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0014" id="linkimage-0014"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0305.jpg" alt="0305 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0305.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- While this was going forward, Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, came as swift
- as wing could carry to the lodge where Wah-bee-noh was asleep rolled up in
- a bear-skin. Wah-bee-noh was happy, for with the big medicine robe which
- the Robin had brought him, he already had bought the eight further ponies
- from Kwa-Sind an&rsquo; they then grazed in Wah-bee-noh&rsquo;s herd. As Wah-bee-noh
- laughed in his sleep because he dreamed of the twenty ponies he had earned
- from Kwa-Sind, the Firefly stooped an&rsquo; stung him inside his mouth. An&rsquo; so
- perished Wah-bee-noh in a flame of fever, for the poison of
- Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, burns one to death like live coals.
- </p>
- <p>
- Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, found Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, holding the Robin
- fast. But Sug-gee-mah was stout, an&rsquo; he stooped an&rsquo; stung the Sleep so
- hard he let go of the Robin an&rsquo; stood up to fight.
- </p>
- <p>
- All night an&rsquo; all day an&rsquo; all night, an&rsquo; yet many days an&rsquo; nights, did
- Sug-gee-mah, the &lsquo;bold Mosquito, an&rsquo; Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, fight for the
- Robin. An&rsquo; whenever Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, would take the Robin in his
- arms, &lsquo;Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, would strike him with his little lance.
- For many days an&rsquo; nights did Sug-gee-mah, the Mosquito, hold Nee-pah-win,
- the Sleep, at bay; an&rsquo; in the end the Robin turned wild an&rsquo; crazy, for
- unless Nee-pah-win, the Sleep, takes each man an&rsquo; woman in his arms when
- the sun goes down it is as if they were bitten by the evil polecats who
- are rabid; an&rsquo; the men an&rsquo; women who are not held in the arms of
- Nee-pah-win go mad an&rsquo; rave like starved wolves till they die. An&rsquo; thus it
- was with the Robin. After many days an&rsquo; nights, Pau-guk, the Death, came
- for her also, an&rsquo; those three who had done evil to the Swallow were
- punished.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa, collecting the knife, the bear-claws an&rsquo; the big medicine robe
- from the lodge of Kwa-Sind, gave them to the Swallow again. This time the
- Swallow stood better guard, an&rsquo; no squaw, however cunning, might make a
- fool of him&mdash;though many tried&mdash;so he kept his knife, the
- bear-claws, an&rsquo; the big medicine robe these many years while he lived.
- </p>
- <p>
- As for Sub-bee-kah-shee, the Spider, an&rsquo; Wah-wah-tah-see, the Firefly, an&rsquo;
- Sug-gee-mah, the brave Mosquito, Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, for a reward gave
- them an&rsquo; their countless squaws an&rsquo; papooses forever that fine swamp where
- Apuk-wah, the Bulrush, grows thick an&rsquo; green, an&rsquo; makes a best hunting
- grounds for the three little warriors who killed Kwa-Sind, Wah-bee-noh,
- an&rsquo; the Robin on that day when Moh-Kwa called them his enemies. An&rsquo; now
- when every man was at peace an&rsquo; happy, Moh-Kwa brought the Sioux together
- an&rsquo; re-named the Swallow &ldquo;Thorn-Puller;&rdquo; an&rsquo; by that name was he known
- till he died.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How many are there of these Sioux folk-lore tales?&rdquo; asked the Jolly
- Doctor of Sioux Sam.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;How many leaves in June?&rdquo; asked Sioux Sam. &ldquo;If our Great Medicine&rdquo;&mdash;so
- he called the Jolly Doctor&mdash;&ldquo;were with the Dakotahs, the old men an&rsquo;
- the squaws would tell him a fresh one for every fresh hour of his life.
- There is no end.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- While the Jolly Doctor was reflecting on this reply, the Red Nosed
- Gentleman, raising his glass of burgundy to the Sour Gentleman who
- returned the compliment in whiskey, said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;My respects to you, sir; and may we hope you will now give us that
- adventure of The German Girl&rsquo;s Diamonds?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I shall have the utmost pleasure,&rdquo; responded the Sour Gentleman. &ldquo;You may
- not consider it of mighty value as a story, but perhaps as a chapter in
- former Custom&rsquo;s iniquity one may concede it a use.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0020" id="link2HCH0020"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XX.&mdash;THE GERMAN GIRL&rsquo;S DIAMONDS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>t cannot be said,
- my friends, that I liked my position in that sink of evil, the New York
- Customs. I was on good terms with my comrades, but I founded no
- friendships among them. It has been and still is a belief of mine, and one
- formed at an early age, that everybody wears suggestive resemblance to
- some bird or fish or beast. I&rsquo;ve seen a human serpent&rsquo;s face, triangular,
- poisonous, menacing with ophidian eyes; I&rsquo;ve seen a dove&rsquo;s face, soft,
- gentle, harmless, and with lips that cooed as they framed and uttered
- words. And there are faces to remind one of dogs, of sheep, of apes, of
- swine, of eagles, of pike&mdash;ravenous, wide-mouthed, swift. I&rsquo;ve even
- encountered a bear&rsquo;s face on Broadway&mdash;one full of a window-peering
- curiosity, yet showing a contented, sluggish sagacity withal. And every
- face about me in the Customs would carry out my theory. As I glanced from
- Lorns to Quin, and from Quin to another, and so to the last upon the list,
- I beheld reflected as in a glass, a hawk, or an owl, or a wolf, or a fox,
- or a ferret, or even a cat. But each rapacious; each stamped with the
- instinct of predation as though the word &ldquo;Wolf&rdquo; were written across his
- forehead. Even Betelnut Jack gave one the impression that belongs with
- some old, rusty black-eagle with worn and tumbled plumage. I took no joy
- of my comrades; saw no more of them than I might; despised my trade of
- land-pirate&mdash;for what better could it be called?&mdash;and following
- that warning from &ldquo;Josephus&rdquo; was ever haunted of a weird fear of what
- might come. Still, I remained and claimed my loot with the rest. And you
- ask why? When all is said, I was as voracious as the others; I clinked the
- coins in my pocket, and consoled myself against the foul character of such
- profits with that thought of Vespasian: &ldquo;The smell of all money is sweet.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Following my downfall of tobacco, I had given up my rich apartments in
- Twenty-second Street; and while I retained my membership, I went no more
- to the two or three clubs into which I&rsquo;d been received. In truth, these
- Custom House days I seldom strolled as far northward as Twenty-third
- Street; but taking a couple of moderate rooms to the south of Washington
- Square, I stuck to them or to the park in front as much as ever I might;
- passing a lonely life and meeting none I&rsquo;d known before.
- </p>
- <p>
- One sun-filled September afternoon, being free at that hour, I was
- occupying a bench in Washington Square, amusing my idleness with the
- shadows chequered across the walk by an overspreading tree. A sound caught
- my ear; I looked up to be mildly amazed by the appearance of Betelnut
- Jack. It was seldom my chief was found so far from his eyrie in the
- Bowery; evidently he was seeking me. His first words averred as much.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I was over to your rooms,&rdquo; remarked Betelnut Jack; &ldquo;they told me you were
- here.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then he gave me a pure Havana&mdash;for we of the Customs might smoke what
- cigars we would&mdash;lighted another and betook himself to a few moments
- of fragrant, wordless tranquility. I was aware, of course, that Betelnut
- Jack had a purpose in coming; but curiosity was never among my vices, and
- I did not ask his mission. With a feeling of indifference, I awaited its
- development in his own good way and time.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack was more apt to listen than talk; but upon this Washington
- Square afternoon, he so far departed those habits of taciturnity commonly
- his own as to furnish the weight of conversation. He did not hurry to his
- business, but rambled among a score of topics. He even described to me by
- what accident he arrived at his by-name of Betelnut Jack. He said he was a
- sailor in his youth. Then he related how he went on deep water ships to
- India and to the China seas; how he learned to chew betel from the
- Orientals; how after he came ashore he was still addicted to betel; how a
- physician, ignorant of betel and its crimson consequences, fell into vast
- excitement over what he concevied to be a perilous hemorrhage; and how
- before Jack could explain, seized on him and hurried him into a near-by
- drug shop. When he understood his mistake, the physician took it in
- dudgeon, and was inclined to blame Jack for those sanguinary yet
- fraudulent symptoms. One result of the adventure was to re-christen him
- &ldquo;Betelnut Jack,&rdquo; the name still sticking, albeit he had for long abandoned
- betel as a taste outgrown.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack continued touching his career in New York; always with
- caution, however, slurring some parts and jumping others; from which I
- argued that portions of my chief&rsquo;s story were made better by not being
- divulged. It occurred, too, as a deduction drawn from his confidences that
- Betelnut Jack had been valorous as a Know-Nothing; and he spoke with
- rapture of the great prize-fighter, Tom Hyer, who beat Yankee Sullivan;
- and then of the fistic virtues of the brave Bill Poole, coming near to
- tears as he set forth the latter&rsquo;s murder in Stanwix Hall.
- </p>
- <p>
- Also, I gathered that Betelnut Jack had been no laggard at hurling stones
- and smashing windows in the Astor Place riot of 1849.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And the soldiers killed one hundred and thirty-four,&rdquo; sighed Betelnut
- Jack, when describing the battle; &ldquo;and wounded four times as many more.
- And all, mind you! for a no-good English actor with an Irish name!&rdquo; This
- last in accents of profound disgust.
- </p>
- <p>
- In the end Betelnut Jack began to wax uneasy; it was apparent how he
- yearned for his nest in the familiar Bowery. With that he came bluntly to
- the purpose.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To-morrow, early,&rdquo; he said, &ldquo;take one of the women inspectors and go down
- to quarantine. Some time in the course of the day, the steamship
- &lsquo;Wolfgang,&rsquo; from Bremen, will arrive. Go aboard at once. In the second
- cabin you will find a tall, gray, old German; thin, with longish hair. He
- may have on dark goggles; if he hasn&rsquo;t, you will observe that he is blind
- of the right eye. His daughter, a girl of twenty-three, will be with him.
- Her hair will be done up in that heavy roll which hair-dressers call the
- &lsquo;waterfall,&rsquo; and hang in a silk close-meshed net low on her neck. Hidden
- in the girl&rsquo;s hair are diamonds of a Berlin value of over one hundred and
- twenty thousand dollars. You will search the old man, and have the woman
- inspector search the girl. Don&rsquo;t conduct yourselves as though you knew
- what you were looking for. Tell your assistant to find the girl&rsquo;s diamonds
- naturally; let her work to them by degrees, not swoop on them.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Betelnut Jack disposed himself for homeward flight. I asked how he
- became aware of the jewels and the place of their concealment.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Never mind that now,&rdquo; was his reply; &ldquo;you&rsquo;ll know later. But get the
- diamonds; they&rsquo;re there and you must not fail. I&rsquo;ve come for you, as
- you&rsquo;re more capable of doing the gentleman than some of the others, and
- this is a case where a dash of refinement won&rsquo;t hurt the trick.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- With that Betelnut Jack lounged over to Fourth Street and disappeared
- towards Broadway and the Bowery further east.
- </p>
- <p>
- Following my chief&rsquo;s departure, I continued in idle contemplation of the
- shadows. This occupation did not forbid a mental looking up and down of
- what would be my next day&rsquo;s work. The prospect was far from refreshing.
- When one is under thirty, a proposal to plunder a girl&mdash;a beautiful
- girl, doubtless&mdash;of her diamonds, does not appeal to one. There would
- be woe, tears, lamentations, misery with much wringing of hands. I began
- to call myself a villain.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then, as against her, and defensive of myself, I argued the outlaw
- character of the girl&rsquo;s work. Be she beautiful or be she favored ill,
- still she is breaking the law. It was our oath to seize the gems; whatever
- of later wrong was acted, at best or worst, it was no wrong done her. In
- truth! when she was at last left free and at liberty, she would be favored
- beyond her deserts; for those Customs laws which she was cheating spoke of
- grates and keys and bars and bolts.
- </p>
- <p>
- In this wise, and as much as might be, I comforted myself against the
- disgrace of an enterprise from which I naturally recoiled, hardening
- myself as to the poor girl marked to be our prey. I confess I gained no
- great success; say what I might, I contemned myself.
- </p>
- <p>
- While thus ruminating that dishonor into which I conceived myself to have
- fallen, I recalled a story written by Edgar Allen Poe. It is a sketch
- wherein a wicked man is ever followed and thwarted by one who lives his
- exact semblance in each line of face and form. This doppel-ganger, as the
- Germans name him, while the same with himself in appearance and dress, is
- his precise opposite in moral nature. This struggle between the haunted
- one and his weird, begins in boyhood and continues till middle age. At the
- last, frantic under a final opposition, the haunted one draws sword and
- slays his enemy. Too late, as he wipes the blood from his blade, he finds
- that he has killed his better self; too late he sees that from that time
- to the end, the present will have no hope, the future hold no heaven; that
- he must sink and sink and sink, until he is grasped by those hands
- outstretched of hell to forever have him for their horrid own. I wondered
- if I were not like that man unhappy; I asked if I did not, by these
- various defenses and apologies which I made ever for my wickedness, work
- towards the death of my better nature whose destruction when it did come
- would mean the departure forever of my soul&rsquo;s chance.
- </p>
- <p>
- I stood up and shook myself in a canine way. Decidedly, loneliness was
- making me morbid! However that may have been, I passed a far from happy
- afternoon.
- </p>
- <p>
- Fairly speaking, these contentions shook me somewhat in my resolves. There
- were moments when I determined to refuse my diamond-hunting commission and
- resign my place. I even settled the style of my resignation; it should be
- full of sarcasm.
- </p>
- <p>
- But alas! these white dreams faded; in the end I was ready to execute the
- orders of Betelnut Jack; and that which decided me was surely the weakest
- thought of all. Somehow, I had in my thoughts put down the coming German
- maiden as beautiful; Betelnut Jack had said her age was twenty-three,
- which helped me to this thought of girlish loveliness. Thus, my imaginings
- worked in favor of the girl.
- </p>
- <p>
- But next the thought fell blackly that she would some day&mdash;probably a
- near day&mdash;love some man unknown and marry him. Possibly this lover
- she already knew; perhaps he was here and she on her way to meet him! This
- will sound like jest; it will earn derision from healthful, balanced
- spirits; and yet I tell but the truth.
- </p>
- <p>
- I experienced a vague, resentful jealousy, hated this imagined lover of a
- girl I&rsquo;d never met, and waxed contemptuous of aught of leniency towards
- one or both. I would do as Betelnut Jack ordered; I would go down to
- quarantine on the morrow; and I would find the diamonds.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was late in the afternoon when with a woman assistant, I boarded the
- &ldquo;Wolfgang&rdquo; in the Narrows. My aged German was readily picked up; his
- daughter was with him. And her beauty was as I&rsquo;d painted on the canvas of
- my thoughts. Yet when I beheld the loveliness which should have melted me,
- I recalled that lover to whose arms she might be coming and was hardened
- beyond recall. I told the inspectress to take her into her private room
- and find the diamonds. With that, I turned my back and strolled to the
- forward deck. Even at that distance I heard the shriek of the girl when
- her treasure was discovered.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;There will be less for the lover!&rdquo; I thought.
- </p>
- <p>
- When my woman assistant&mdash;accomplice might be the truer term&mdash;joined
- me, she had the jewels. They were in a long eel-skin receptacle, sewed
- tightly, and had been secreted in the girl&rsquo;s hair as described by Betelnut
- Jack. I took the gems, and buttoning them in my coat, told my aide&mdash;who
- with a feminine fashion of bitterness seemed exultant over having deprived
- another of her gew-gaws&mdash;to arrest the girl, hold her until the boat
- docked, frighten her with tales of fetters and dungeons and clanging bars,
- and at the last to lose her on the wharf. It would be nine o&rsquo;clock of the
- night by then, and murk dark; this loss of her prisoner would seem to come
- honestly about.
- </p>
- <p>
- If I were making a romance, rather than bending to a relation of cold,
- gray, hard, untender facts, I would at this crisis defy Betelnut Jack,
- rescue the beautiful girl, restore her jewels, love her, win her, wed her,
- and with her true, dear arms about me, live happy ever after. As it was,
- however, I did nothing of that good sort. My aide obeyed directions in a
- mood at once thorough, blithe, and spiteful, and never more did I set eyes
- on the half-blind father or the tearful, pretty, poor victim of our
- diamond hunting. Lost in the crush and bustle of the wharf, they were
- never found, never looked for, and never rendered themselves.
- </p>
- <p>
- I had considered what profit from these jewels might accrue to the ring
- and the means by which it would be arrived at. I took it for granted that
- some substitutional arts&mdash;when paste would take the places of old
- mine gems&mdash;would be resorted to as in the excellent instance of The
- Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars. But Betelnut Jack shook his careful head; there would be
- no hokus-pokus of substitution; there were good reasons. Also, there was
- another way secure. If our profits were somewhat shaved, our safety would
- be augmented; and Betelnut Jack&rsquo;s watchword was &ldquo;Safety first!&rdquo; I was
- bound to acquiesce; I the more readily did so since, like Lorns and Quin,
- I had grown to perfect confidence in the plans of Betelnut Jack. However,
- when now I had brushed aside etiquette and broken the ice of the matter
- with my chief, I asked how he meant to manoeuver in the affair.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Wait!&rdquo; retorted Betelnut Jack, and that was the utmost he would say.
- </p>
- <p>
- In due time came the usual auction and the gems were sold. They were
- snapped up by a syndicate of wise folk of Maiden Lane who paid therefor
- into the hands of the government the even sum of one hundred thousand
- dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- Still I saw not how our ring would have advantage; no way could open for
- us to handle those one hundred thousand dollars in whole or in part. I was
- in error; a condition whereof I was soon to be made pleasantly aware.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the day following the sale, and while the price paid still slept
- unbanked in the Customs boxes of proof-steel, there came one to see our
- canny chief. It is useless to waste description on this man. Suffice it
- that he was in fact and in appearance as skulkingly the coward scoundrel
- as might anywhere be met. This creeping creature was shown into the
- private rooms of Betelnut Jack. A moment later, I was sent for.
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack was occupying a chair; he wore an air of easy confidence;
- and over that, a sentiment of contempt for his visitor. This latter was
- posed in the middle of the room; and while an apprehension of impending
- evil showed on his face, he made cringing and deprecatory gestures with
- shoulders hunched and palms turned outward.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Sit down,&rdquo; observed Betelnut Jack, pushing a chair towards me. When I was
- seated, he spoke on. &ldquo;Since it was you who found the diamonds, I thought
- it right to have you present now. You asked me once how I knew in advance
- of those gems and their scheme of concealment. To-day you may learn. This
- is the gentleman who gave me the information. He did it to obtain the
- reward&mdash;to receive that great per cent, of the seizure&rsquo;s proceeds
- which is promised the informer by the law. His information was right; he
- is entitled to the reward. That is what he is here for; he has come to be
- paid.&rdquo; Then to the hangdog, cringing one: &ldquo;Pretty good day&rsquo;s work for you,
- eh? Over fifty thousand dollars for a little piece of information is stiff
- pay!&rdquo; The hangdog one bowed lower and a smirk of partial confidence began
- to broaden his face. &ldquo;And now you&rsquo;ve come for your money&mdash;fifty odd
- thousand!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;If you please, sir! yes, sir!&rdquo; More and wider smirks.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;All right!&rdquo; retorted Betelnut Jack. &ldquo;You shall have it, friend; but not
- now&mdash;not to-day.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Then when?&rdquo; and the smirk fled.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;To-morrow,&rdquo; said Betelnut Jack. &ldquo;To-morrow, next day, any day in fact
- when you bring before me to be witnesses of the transaction the father,
- the sister, and your wife.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Across the face of the hangdog one spread a pallor that was as the
- whiteness of death. There burned the fires of a hot agony in his eyes as
- though a dirk had slowly pierced him. His voice fell in a husky whisper.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You would cheat me!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;No; I would do you perfect justice,&rdquo; replied Betelnut Jack. &ldquo;Not a
- splinter do you finger until you bring your people. Your wife and her
- sister and their father shall know this story, and stand here while the
- money is paid. Not a stiver else! Now, go!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Betelnut Jack&rsquo;s tones were as remorseless as a storm; they offered nothing
- to hope; the hangdog one heard and crept away with a look on his face that
- was but ill to see. Once the door was closed behind him, Betelnut Jack
- turned with a cheerful gleam to me.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That ends him! It&rsquo;s as you guess. This informer is the son-in-law of the
- old German. He married the elder daughter. They came over four years ago
- and live in Hoboken. Then the father and the younger sister were to come.
- They put their whole fortune into the diamonds, aiming to cheat the
- Customs and manage a profit; and the girl wrote their plans and how they
- would hide the jewels to her sister. It was she who told her husband&mdash;this
- fellow who&rsquo;s just sneaked out. He came to me and betrayed them; he was
- willing to ruin the old man and the girl to win riches for himself. But
- he&rsquo;s gone; he&rsquo;ll not return; we&rsquo;ve seen and heard the last of them; one
- fears the jail, the other the wrath of his wife; and that&rsquo;s the end.&rdquo; Then
- Betelnut Jack, as he lighted a cigar, spoke the word which told to folk
- initiate of a division of spoil on the morrow. As I arose, he said: &ldquo;Ask
- Lorns to come here.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Well,&rdquo; remarked the Old Cattleman when the Sour Gentleman was done, &ldquo;I
- don&rsquo;t want to say nothin&rsquo; to discourage you-all, but if I&rsquo;d picked up your
- hand that time I wouldn&rsquo;t have played it. I shorely would have let that
- Dutch girl keep her beads. Didn&rsquo;t the thing ha&rsquo;nt you afterwards?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It gave me a deal of uneasiness,&rdquo; responded the Sour Gentleman. &ldquo;I am not
- proud of my performance. And yet, I don&rsquo;t see what else I might have done.
- Those diamonds were as good as in the hands of Betelnut Jack from the
- moment the skulking brother-in-law brought him the information.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s one relief,&rdquo; observed the Red Nosed Gentleman, &ldquo;to know how that
- scoundrel came off no richer by his treachery.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;What I observes partic&rsquo;lar in the narration,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman, &ldquo;is
- how luck is the predominatin&rsquo; feacher throughout. The girl an&rsquo; her old pap
- has bad luck in losin&rsquo; the gewgaw&rsquo;s. You-all customs sharps has good luck
- in havin&rsquo; the news brought to your hand as to where them diamonds is hid,
- by a coyote whom you can bluff plumb outen the play at the finish. As for
- the coyote informer, why he has luck in bein&rsquo; allowed to live.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; speakin&rsquo; of luck, seein&rsquo; that in this yere story-tellin&rsquo; arrangement
- that seems to have grown up in our midst, I&rsquo;m the next chicken on the
- roost, I&rsquo;ll onfold to you gents concernin&rsquo; &lsquo;The Luck of Cold-sober
- Simms.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0021" id="link2HCH0021"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXI.&mdash;THE LUCK OF COLD-SOBER SIMMS.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>hich this yere
- tale is mighty devious, not to say disjointed, because, d&rsquo;you see! from
- first to last, she&rsquo;s all the truth. Now, thar is folks sech as Injuns an&rsquo;
- them sagacious sports which we-all terms philosophers, who talks of truth
- bein&rsquo; straight. Injuns will say a liar has a forked tongue, while
- philosophers will speak of a straight ondeviatin&rsquo; narrative, meanin&rsquo;
- tharby to indooce you to regyard said story as the emanation of honesty in
- its every word. For myse&rsquo;f I don&rsquo;t subscribe none to these yere phrases.
- In my own experience it&rsquo;s the lies that runs in a straight line like a
- bullet, whereas the truth goes onder an&rsquo; over, an&rsquo; up an&rsquo; down, doubles
- an&rsquo; jumps sideways a dozen times before ever it finally finds its camp in
- what book-sharps call the &ldquo;climax.&rdquo; Which I says ag&rsquo;in that this tale,
- bein&rsquo; troo, has nacherally as many kinks in it as a new lariat.
- </p>
- <p>
- Bein&rsquo; thoughtful that a-way, an&rsquo; preyed on by a desire to back-track every
- fact to its fountain-head, meanwhile considerin&rsquo; how different the kyards
- would have fallen final if something prior had been done or left on done,
- has ever been my weakness. It&rsquo;s allers so with me. I can recall as a child
- how back in Tennessee I deevotes hours when fish-in&rsquo; or otherwise
- uselessly engaged, to wonderin&rsquo; whoever I&rsquo;d have been personal if my maw
- had died in her girlhood an&rsquo; pap had wedded someone else. It&rsquo;s plumb too
- many for me; an&rsquo; now an&rsquo; then when in a sperit of onusual cog&rsquo;tation, I
- ups an&rsquo; wonders where I&rsquo;d be if both my maw an&rsquo; pap had cashed in as
- colts, I&rsquo;d jest simply set down he&rsquo;pless, on-qualified to think at all.
- It&rsquo;s plain that in sech on-toward events as my two parents dyin&rsquo;, say, at
- the age of three, I sort o&rsquo; wouldn&rsquo;t have happened none. This yere solemn
- view never fails to give me the horrors.
- </p>
- <p>
- I fixes the time of this story easy as bein&rsquo; that eepock when Jim East an&rsquo;
- Bob Pierce is sheriffs of the Panhandle, with headquarters in Tascosa, an&rsquo;
- Bob Roberson is chief of the LIT ranch. These yere evidences of merit on
- the parts of them three gents has not, however, anything to do with how
- Cold-sober Simms gets rich at farobank; how two hold-ups plots to rob him;
- how he&rsquo;s saved by the inadvertent capture of a bob-cat who&rsquo;s strange to
- him entire; an&rsquo; how the two hold-ups in their chagrin over Cold-sober&rsquo;s
- escape an&rsquo; the mootual doubts it engenders, pulls on each other an&rsquo;
- relieves the Stranglers from the labor of stringin&rsquo; &rsquo;em to a
- cottonwood.
- </p>
- <p>
- These doin&rsquo;s whereof I gives you a rapid rehearsal, has their start when
- Old Scotty an&rsquo; Locoed Charlie gets drunk in Tascosa prior to startin&rsquo; west
- on their buckboard with the mailbags of the Lee-Scott ranch. Locoed
- Charlie an&rsquo; Old Scotty is drunk when they pulls out; Cold-sober Simms is
- with &rsquo;em as a passenger. At their night camp half way to the
- Lee-Scott, Locoed Charlie, whose head can&rsquo;t stand the strain of Jenkins&rsquo;
- nose-paint, makes war-medicine an&rsquo; lays for Old Scotty all spraddled out.
- As the upcome of these yere hostilities, Old Scotty confers a most
- elab&rsquo;rate beatin&rsquo; on Locoed Charlie; after which they-all cooks their
- grub, feeds, an&rsquo; goes to sleep.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Locoed Charlie don&rsquo;t go to sleep; he lays thar drunk an&rsquo; disgruntled
- an&rsquo; hungerin&rsquo; to play even. As a good revengeful scheme, Locoed Charlie
- allows he&rsquo;ll get up an&rsquo; secrete the mailbag, thinkin&rsquo; tharby to worry Old
- Scotty till he sweats blood. Locoed Charlie packs the mailbag over among
- some rocks which is thick grown with cedar bresh. When it comes sun-up an&rsquo;
- Locoed Charlie is sober an&rsquo; repents, an&rsquo; tells Old Scotty of his little
- game, neither he nor Scotty can find that mailbag nohow. Locoed Charlie
- shore hides her good.
- </p>
- <p>
- Locoed Charlie an&rsquo; Scotty don&rsquo;t dare go on without it, but stays an&rsquo;
- searches; Cold-sober Simms&mdash;who is given this yere nom-de-guerre, as
- Colonel Sterett terms it, because he&rsquo;s the only sport in the Panhandle who
- don&rsquo;t drink&mdash;stays with &rsquo;em to help on the hunt. At last,
- failin&rsquo; utter to discover the missin&rsquo; mail, Locoed Charlie an&rsquo; Old Scotty
- returns to Tascosa in fear an&rsquo; tremblin&rsquo;, not packin&rsquo; the nerve to face
- McAllister, who manages for the Lee-Scott, an&rsquo; inform him of the yoonique
- disposition they makes of his outfit&rsquo;s letters. This return to Tascosa is,
- after all, mere proodence, since McAllister is a mighty emotional manager,
- that a-way, an&rsquo; it&rsquo;s as good as even money he hangs both of them culprits
- in that first gust of enthoosiasm which would be shore to follow any
- explanation they can make. So they returns; an&rsquo; because he can&rsquo;t he&rsquo;p
- himse&rsquo;f none, bein&rsquo; he&rsquo;s only a passenger on that buckboard, Cold-sober
- Simms returns with &rsquo;em. No, the mailbag is found a week later by a
- Lee-Scott rider, an&rsquo; for the standin&rsquo; of Locoed Charlie an&rsquo; Scotty it&rsquo;s as
- well he does.
- </p>
- <p>
- Cold-sober is some sore at bein&rsquo; baffled in his trip to the Lee-Scott
- since he aims to go to work thar as a rider. To console himse&rsquo;f, he turns
- in an&rsquo; bucks a faro game that a brace of onknown black-laigs who shows in
- Tascosa from Fort Elliot the day prior, has onfurled in James&rsquo; s&rsquo;loon. As
- sometimes happens, Cold-sober plays in all brands an&rsquo; y&rsquo;earmarks of luck,
- an&rsquo; in four hours breaks the bank. It ain&rsquo;t overstrong, no sech
- institootion of finance in fact as Cherokee Hall&rsquo;s faro game in Wolfville,
- an&rsquo; when Cold-sober calls the last nine-king turn for one hundred, an&rsquo; has
- besides a hundred on the nine, coppered, an&rsquo; another hundred open on the
- king, tharby reapin&rsquo; six hundred dollars as the froots of said feat, the
- sharp who&rsquo;s deal-in&rsquo; turns up his box an&rsquo; tells Cold-sober to set in his
- chips to be cashed. Cold-sober sets &rsquo;em in; nine thousand five
- hundred dollars bein&rsquo; the roundup, an&rsquo; the dealer-sharp hands over the
- dinero. Then in a sperit of resentment the dealer-sharp picks up the
- faro-box an&rsquo; smashes it ag&rsquo;in the wall.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Thar bein&rsquo; nothin&rsquo; left,&rdquo; he says to his fellow black-laig, who&rsquo;s settin&rsquo;
- in the look-out&rsquo;s chair, &ldquo;for you an&rsquo; me but to prance out an&rsquo; stand up a
- stage, we may as well dismiss that deal-box from our affairs. I knowed
- that box was a hoodoo ever since Black Morgan gets killed over it in
- Mobeetie; an&rsquo; so I tells you, but you-all wouldn&rsquo;t heed.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Cold-sober is shore elated about his luck; them nine thousand odd dollars
- is more wealth than he ever sees; an&rsquo; how to dispose of it, now he&rsquo;s got
- it, begins to bother Cold-sober a heap. One gent says, &ldquo;Hive it in
- Howard&rsquo;s Store!&rdquo; another su&rsquo;gests he leave it with old man Cohn; while
- still others agrees it&rsquo;s Cold-sober&rsquo;s dooty to blow it in.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which if I was you-all,&rdquo; says Johnny Cook of the LIT outfit, &ldquo;I&rsquo;d shore
- sally forth an&rsquo; buy nose-paint with that treasure while a peso remained.&rdquo;
- But Cold-sober turns down these divers proposals an&rsquo; allows he&rsquo;ll pack
- said roll in his pocket a whole lot, which he accordin&rsquo; does.
- </p>
- <p>
- Cold-sober hangs &rsquo;round Tascosa for mighty near a week,
- surrenderin&rsquo; all thought of gettin&rsquo; to the Lee-Scott ranch, feelin&rsquo; that
- he&rsquo;s now too rich to punch cattle. Doorin&rsquo; this season of idleness
- art&rsquo;ease, Cold-sober bunks in with a jimcrow English doctor who&rsquo;s got a &rsquo;doby
- in Tascosa an&rsquo; who calls himse&rsquo;f Chepp. He&rsquo;s a decent form of maverick,
- however, this yere Chepp, an&rsquo; him an&rsquo; Cold-sober becomes as thick as
- thieves.
- </p>
- <p>
- Cold-sober&rsquo;s stay with Chepp is brief as I states; in a week he gets
- restless ag&rsquo;in for work; whereupon he hooks up with Roberson, an&rsquo; goes
- p&rsquo;intin&rsquo; south across the Canadian on a L I T hoss to hold down one of
- that brand&rsquo;s sign-camps in Mitchell&rsquo;s canyon. It&rsquo;s only twenty miles, an&rsquo;
- lie&rsquo;s thar in half a day&mdash;him an&rsquo; Wat Peacock who&rsquo;s to be his mate.
- An&rsquo; Cold-sober packs with him that fortune of ninety-five hundred.
- </p>
- <p>
- The two black-laigs who&rsquo;s been depleted that away still hankers about
- Tascosa; but as mighty likely they don&rsquo;t own the riches to take &rsquo;em
- out o&rsquo; town, not much is thought. Nor does it ruffle the feathers of
- commoonal suspicion when the two disappears a few days after Cold-sober
- goes ridin&rsquo; away to assoome them LIT reesponsibilities in Mitchell&rsquo;s
- canyon. The public is too busy to bother itse&rsquo;f about &rsquo;em. It comes
- out later, however, that the goin&rsquo; of Cold-sober has everything to do with
- the exodus of them hold-ups, an&rsquo; that they&rsquo;ve been layin&rsquo; about since they
- loses their roll on a chance of get-tin&rsquo; it back. When Cold-sober p&rsquo;ints
- south for Mitchell&rsquo;s that time, it&rsquo;s as good as these outlaws asks. They
- figgers on trailin&rsquo; him to Mitchell&rsquo;s an&rsquo; hidin&rsquo; out ontil some hour when
- Peacock&rsquo;s off foolin&rsquo; about the range; when they argues Cold-sober would
- be plumb easy, an&rsquo; they&rsquo;ll kill an&rsquo; skelp him an&rsquo; clean him up for his
- money, an&rsquo; ride away.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;In fact,&rdquo; explains the one Cold-sober an&rsquo; Peacock finds alive, &ldquo;it&rsquo;s our
- idee that the killin&rsquo; an&rsquo; skelpin&rsquo; an&rsquo; pillagin&rsquo; of Cold-sober would get
- layed to Peacock, which would mean safety for us an&rsquo; at the same time be a
- jest on Peacock that would be plumb hard to beat.&rdquo; That was the plan of
- these outlaws; an&rsquo; the cause of its failure is the followin&rsquo; episode, to
- wit:
- </p>
- <p>
- It looks like this Doc Chepp is locoed to collect wild anamiles that
- a-way.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which I wants,&rdquo; says this shorthorn Chepp, &ldquo;a speciment of every sort o&rsquo;
- the fauna of these yere regions, savin&rsquo; an&rsquo; exceptin&rsquo; polecats. I knows
- enough of the latter pungent beast from an encounter I has with one, to
- form notions ag&rsquo;in &rsquo;em over which not even the anxious cry of
- science can preevail. Polecats is barred from my c&rsquo;llec-tions. But,&rdquo; an&rsquo;
- said Chepp imparts this last to Cold-sober as the latter starts for
- Mitchell&rsquo;s, &ldquo;if by any sleight or dexterity you-all accomplishes the
- capture of a bob-cat, bring the interestin&rsquo; creature to me at once. An&rsquo;
- bring him alive so I may observe an&rsquo; note his pecooliar traits.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the third mornin&rsquo; in Mitchell&rsquo;s when a bobcat is seen by Cold-sober
- an&rsquo; Peacock to go sa&rsquo;nter-in&rsquo; up the valley. Mebby this yere bob-cat&rsquo;s
- homeless; mebby he&rsquo;s a dissoloote bob-cat an&rsquo; has been out all night
- carousin&rsquo; with other bob-cats an&rsquo; is simply late gettin&rsquo; in; be the reason
- of his appearance what it may, Cold-sober remembers about Doc Chepp&rsquo;s wish
- to own a bob-cat, an&rsquo; him an&rsquo; Peacock lets go all holds, leaps for their
- ponies an&rsquo; gives chase. Thar&rsquo;s a scramblin&rsquo; run up the canyon; then
- Peacock gets his rope onto it, an&rsquo; next Cold-sober fastens with his rope,
- an&rsquo; you hear me, gents, between &rsquo;em they almost rends this yere
- onhappy bobcat in two. They pauses in time, however, an&rsquo; after a fearful
- struggle they succeeds in stuffin&rsquo; the bob-cat into Peacock&rsquo;s leather
- laiggin&rsquo;s, which the latter gent removes for that purpose. Bound hand an&rsquo;
- foot, an&rsquo; wropped in the laiggin&rsquo;s so tight he can hardly squawl, that
- bob-cat&rsquo;s put before Cold-sober on his saddle; an&rsquo; this bein&rsquo; fixed,
- Cold-sober heads for Tascosa to present him to his naturalist friend,
- Chepp, Peacock scamperin&rsquo; cheerfully along like a drunkard to a barbecue
- regyardin&rsquo; the racket as a ondeniable excuse for gettin&rsquo; soaked.
- </p>
- <p>
- This adventure of the bob-cat is the savin&rsquo; clause in the case of
- Cold-sober Simms. As the bobcat an&rsquo; him an&rsquo; Peacock rides away, them two
- malefactors is camped not five miles off, over by the Serrita la Cruz, an&rsquo;
- arrangin&rsquo; to go projectin&rsquo; &rsquo;round for Cold-sober an&rsquo; his
- ninety-five hundred that very evenin&rsquo;. In truth, they execootes their
- scheme; but only to find when they jumps his camp in Mitchell&rsquo;s that
- Cold-sober&rsquo;s done vamosed a whole lot.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s then trouble begins to gather for the two rustlers. The one who deals
- the game that time is so overcome by Cold-sober&rsquo;s absence, he peevishly
- puts it up that his pard gives Cold-sober warnin&rsquo; with the idee of later
- whackin&rsquo; up the roll with him by way of a reward for his virchoo.
- Nacherally no se&rsquo;f-respectin&rsquo; miscreant will submit to sech impeachments,
- an&rsquo; the accoosed makes a heated retort, punctuatin&rsquo; his observations with
- his gun. Thar-upon the other proceeds to voice his feelin&rsquo;s with his
- six-shooter; an&rsquo; the mootual remarks of these yere dispootants is so well
- aimed an&rsquo; ackerate that next evenin&rsquo; when Cold-sober an&rsquo; Peacock returns,
- they finds one dead an&rsquo; t&rsquo;other dyin&rsquo; with even an&rsquo; exact jestice broodin&rsquo;
- over all.
- </p>
- <p>
- As Cold-sober an&rsquo; Peacock is settin&rsquo; by their fire that night, restin&rsquo;
- from their labors in plantin&rsquo; the two hold-ups, Cold-sober starts up
- sudden an&rsquo; says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Yereafter I adopts a bob-cat for my coat-o&rsquo;-arms. Also, I changes my mind
- about Howard, an&rsquo; to-morry I&rsquo;ll go chargin&rsquo; into Tascosa an&rsquo; leave said
- ninety-five hundred in his iron box. Thar&rsquo;s more &lsquo;bad men&rsquo; at Fort Elliot
- than them two we plants, an&rsquo; mebby some more of &rsquo;em may come
- a-weavin&rsquo; up the Canadian with me an&rsquo; my wealth as their objective p&rsquo;int.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Peacock endorses the notion enthoosiastic, an&rsquo; declar&rsquo;s himse&rsquo;f in on the
- play as a body-guard; for he sees in this yere second expedition a new
- o&rsquo;casion for another drunk, an&rsquo; Peacock jest nacherally dotes on a
- debauch.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And what did your Cold-sober Simms,&rdquo; asked the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;finally
- do with his money? Did he go into the cattle business?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Never buys a hoof,&rdquo; returned the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;No, indeed; he loses it
- ag&rsquo;in monte in Kelly&rsquo;s s&rsquo;loon in Dodge. Charley Bassett who&rsquo;s marshal at
- the time tries to git Cold-sober to pass up that monte game. But thar
- ain&rsquo;t no headin&rsquo; him; he would buck it, an&rsquo; so the sharp who&rsquo;s deal-in&rsquo;,
- Butcher Knife Bill it is&mdash;turns in an&rsquo; knocks Cold-sober&rsquo;s horns
- plumb off.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The sudden collapse of the volatile Cold-sober&rsquo;s fortunes was quite a
- dampener to the Sour Gentleman; he evidently entertained a hope that the
- lucky cow-boy was fated to a rise in life. The news of his final losses
- had less effect on the Red Nosed Gentleman who, having witnessed no little
- gambling in his earlier years, seemed better prepared. In truth, a remark
- he let fall would show as much.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I was sure he would lose it,&rdquo; said the Red Nosed Gentleman. &ldquo;Men win
- money only to lose it to the first game they can find. However, to change
- the subject:&rdquo; Here the Red Nosed Gentleman beamed upon the Jolly Doctor.
- &ldquo;Sir, the hour is young. Can&rsquo;t you aid us to finish the evening with
- another story?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;There is one I might give you,&rdquo; responded the Jolly Doctor. &ldquo;It is of a
- horse-race like that Rescue of Connelly you related and was told me by an
- old friend and patient who I fear was a trifle wild as a youth. This is
- the story as set forth by himself, and for want of a more impressive
- title, we may call it &lsquo;How Prince Rupert Lost.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0022" id="link2HCH0022"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXII.&mdash;HOW PRINCE RUPERT LOST.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span>nd now I&rsquo;ll tell
- you how I once threw stones at Hartford and thereby gained queer money to
- carry me to the bedside of my mother at her death.
- </p>
- <p>
- My father, you should know, was a lawyer of eminence and wide practice at
- the New York bar. His income was magnificent; yet&mdash;thriftless and
- well living&mdash;he spent it with both hands. My mother, who took as
- little concern for the future as himself, aided pleasantly in scattering
- the dollars as fast as they were earned.
- </p>
- <p>
- With no original estate on either side, and not a shilling saved, it was
- to be expected that my father&rsquo;s death should leave us wanting a penny. I
- was twenty-two when the blow fell; he died stricken of an apoplexy, his
- full habit and want of physical exercise marking him to that malady as a
- certain prey.
- </p>
- <p>
- I well recall how this death came upon us as a bolt from the blue. And
- while his partner stood over our affairs like a brother, when the debts
- were paid there remained no more than would manage an annuity for my
- mother of some six hundred dollars. With that she retreated to Westchester
- and lived the little balance of her years with a maiden sister who owned a
- starved farm, all chequered of stone fences, in that region of
- breath-taking hills.
- </p>
- <p>
- It stood my misfortune that I was bred as the son of a wealthy man.
- Columbia was my school and the generosity of my father gilded those
- college days with an allowance of five thousand a year. I became
- proficient&mdash;like many another hare-brain&mdash;in everything save
- books, and was a notable guard on the University Eleven and pulled the bow
- oar in the University Eight. When I came from college the year before my
- father&rsquo;s death I could write myself adept of a score of sciences, each
- physical, not one of which might serve to bring a splinter of return&mdash;not
- one, indeed, that did not demand the possession of largest wealth in its
- pursuit. I was poor in that I did not have a dollar when brought to face
- the world; I was doubly poor with a training that had taught me to spend
- thousands. Therefore, during the eighteen years to succeed my father&rsquo;s
- going, was I tossed on the waves of existence like so much wreckage; and
- that I am not still so thrown about is the offspring of happy exigency
- rather than a condition due to wisdom of my own.
- </p>
- <p>
- My ship of money did not come in until after I&rsquo;d encountered my fortieth
- year. For those eighteen years next prior, if truth must out, I&rsquo;d picked
- up intermittent small money following the races. Turf interest of that day
- settled about such speedy ones as Goldsmith Maid, Lucy, Judge Fullerton
- and American Girl, while Budd Doble, Dan Mace and Jack Splan were more
- often in the papers than was the President. I followed the races, I say;
- sometimes I was flush of money, more often I was poor; but one way or
- another I clung to the skirts of the circuits and managed to live.
- </p>
- <p>
- Now, since age has come to my head and gold to my fingers, and I&rsquo;ve had
- time and the cooled blood wherewith to think, I&rsquo;ve laid my ill courses of
- those eighteen evil years to the doors of what vile ideals of life are
- taught in circles of our very rich. What is true now, was true then. Among
- our &ldquo;best people&rdquo;&mdash;if &ldquo;best&rdquo; be the word where &ldquo;worst&rdquo; might better
- fit the case&mdash;who is held up to youthful emulation? Is it the great
- lawyer, or writer, or preacher, or merchant, or man of medicine? Is it he
- of any trade or calling who stands usefully and profitably at the head of
- his fellows? Never; such gentry of decent effort and clean dollars to flow
- therefrom are not mentioned; or if they be, it is not for compliment and
- often with disdain.
- </p>
- <p>
- And who has honor in the social conventions of our American aristocrats?
- It is young A, who drives an automobile some eighty miles an hour; or
- young B, who sails a single-sticker until her canvas is blown from the
- bolt ropes; or young C, who rides like an Arab at polo; or young D, who
- drives farthest at golf; or young E, who is the headlong first in a paper
- chase. These be the ideals; these the promontories to steer by. Is it
- marvel then when a youth raised of those &ldquo;best circles&rdquo; falls out of his
- nest of money that he lies sprawling, unable to honestly aid himself? Is
- it strange that he afterward lives drunken and precariously and seldom in
- walks asking industry and hard work? His training has been to spend money,
- while his contempt was reserved for those who labored its honorable
- accumulation. Such wrong-taught creatures, bereft of bank accounts, are
- left to adopt the races, the gambling tables, or the wine trade; and with
- all my black wealth of experience, I sit unable to determine which is
- basest and most loathly of the three.
- </p>
- <p>
- During those eighteen roving, race-course years I saw my mother but
- seldom; and I never exposed to her my methods of life. I told her that I
- &ldquo;traveled;&rdquo; and she, good, innocent girl! gained from the phrase a cloudy
- notion that I went the trusted ambassador to various courts of trade of
- some great manufactory. I protected her from the truth to the end, and she
- died brightly confident that her son made a brilliant figure in the world.
- </p>
- <p>
- While on my ignoble wanderings I kept myself in touch with one whom I
- might trust, and who, dwelling near my mother, saw her day by day. He was
- ever in possession of my whereabouts. Her health was a bit perilous from
- heart troubles, and I, as much as I might, maintained arrangements to warn
- me should she turn seriously ill.
- </p>
- <p>
- At first I looked hourly for such notice; but as month after month went by
- and no bad tidings&mdash;nothing save word at intervals that she was
- passing her quiet, uneventful days in comfort, and as each occasional
- visit made to Westchester confirmed such news, my apprehension became
- dulled and dormant. It was a surprise then, and pierced me hideously, when
- I opened the message that told how her days were down to hours and she lay
- dying.
- </p>
- <p>
- The telegram reached me in Hartford. When I took it from the messenger&rsquo;s
- hand I was so poor I could not give him a dime for finding me; and as he
- had been to some detective pains in the business, he left with an ugly
- face as one cheated of appreciation. I could not help it; there dwelt not
- so much as one cheap copper in my pocket. Also, my clothes were none of
- the best; for I&rsquo;d been in ill fortune, and months of bankruptcy had dealt
- unkindly with my wardrobe. But there should be no such word as fail; I
- must find the money to go to her&mdash;find it even though it arrive on
- the tides of robbery.
- </p>
- <p>
- Luck came to me. Within the minute to follow the summons, and while the
- yellow message still fluttered between my fingers, I was hailed from
- across the street. The hail came from a certain coarse gentleman who
- seemed born to horse-races as to an heritage and was, withal, one of the
- few who reaped a harvest from them. This fortunate one was known to the
- guild as Sure-thing Pete.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was fairly early of the morning, eight o&rsquo;clock, and Surething Pete in
- the wake of his several morning drinks&mdash;he was a celebrated sot&mdash;was
- having his boots cleaned. It is a curious thing that half-drunken folk are
- prone to this improvement. That is why a boot-black&rsquo;s chair is found so
- frequently just outside the portals of a rum shop. The prospect of a seat
- allures your drunkard fresh from his latest drink; he may sit at secure
- ease and please his rum-contented fancy with a review of the passing
- crowds; also, the Italian digging and brushing about his soles gives an
- impression that he is subject of concern to some one and this nurses a
- sense of importance and comes as vague tickle to his vanity.
- </p>
- <p>
- Surething Pete, as related, was under the hands of a boot-black when I
- approached. He was much older than I and regarded me as a boy.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Broke, eh?&rdquo; said Surething Pete. His eye, though bleary, was keen. Then
- he tendered a quarter. &ldquo;Take this and go and eat. I&rsquo;ll wait for you here.
- Come back in fifteen minutes and I&rsquo;ll put you in line to make some money.
- I&rsquo;d give you more, but I&rsquo;m afraid you wouldn&rsquo;t return.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Make money! I bolted two eggs and a cup of coffee and was back in ten
- minutes. Surething&rsquo;s second shoe was receiving its last polish. He paid
- the artist, and then turning led me to a rear room of the nearby ginmill.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This is it,&rdquo; said Surething. His voice was rum-husky but he made himself
- clear. &ldquo;There&rsquo;s the special race between Prince Rupert and Creole Belle.
- You know about that?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Of course I knew. These cracks had been especially matched against each
- other. It would be a great contest; the odds were five to three on Prince
- Rupert; thousands were being wagered; the fraternity had talked of nothing
- else for three weeks. Of course I knew!
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Well,&rdquo; went on Surething, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve been put wrong, understand! I&rsquo;ve got my
- bundle on Creole Belle and stand to win a fortune if Prince Rupert is
- beaten. I supposed that I&rsquo;d got his driver fixed. I paid this crook a
- thousand cold and gave him tickets on Creole Belle which stand him to win
- five thousand more to throw the race. But now, with the race to be called
- at two o&rsquo;clock, I get it straight he&rsquo;s out to double-cross me. He&rsquo;ll drive
- Rupert to win; an&rsquo; if he does I&rsquo;m a gone fawnskin. But I&rsquo;ve thought of
- another trick.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then suddenly: &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll tell you what you do; get into this wagon outside and
- come with me.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- With the last word, Surething again headed for the street. We took a
- carriage that stood at the door. In thirty minutes we were on the Charter
- &lsquo;Oak track. At this early hour, we had the course to ourselves. Surething
- walked up the homestretch until we arrived at a point midway between the
- half mile post and the entrance to the stretch.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;See that tree?&rdquo; said Surething, and he pointed to a huge buttonwood&mdash;a
- native&mdash;that stood perhaps twenty feet inside the rail. &ldquo;Come over
- and take a look at it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The great buttonwood was hollow; or rather a half had been torn away by
- some storm. What remained, however, was growing green and strong and stood
- in such fashion towards the course that it offered a perfect hiding place.
- By lying close within the hollow one was screened from any who might drive
- along.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This is the proposition,&rdquo; continued Surething, when I had taken in the
- convenient buttonwood and its advantages. &ldquo;This Rupert can beat the Belle
- if he&rsquo;s driven. But he&rsquo;s as nervous as a girl. If a fly should light on
- him he&rsquo;d go ten feet in the air&mdash;understand? Here now is what I want
- of you. I&rsquo;ll tell you what you&rsquo;re to do; then I&rsquo;ll tell you what you&rsquo;re to
- get. I want you to plant yourself behind this tree&mdash;better come here
- as early as the noon hour. The track &rsquo;ll be clear and no one&rsquo;ll see
- you go under cover, understand! As I say, I want you to plant yourself in
- the sheltering hollow of this buttonwood. You ought to have three rocks&mdash;say
- as big as a guinea&rsquo;s egg&mdash;three stones, d&rsquo;ye see, &rsquo;cause the
- race is heats, best three in five. You must lay dead so no one&rsquo;ll get on.
- As Rupert and the Belle sweep &rsquo;round the curve for the stretch, you
- want to let &rsquo;em get a trifle past you. Then you&rsquo;re to step out and
- nail Rupert&mdash;he&rsquo;ll have the pole without a doubt&mdash;and nail
- Rupert, I say, with a rock. That&rsquo;ll settle him; he&rsquo;ll be up in the air
- like a swallow-bird. It&rsquo;ll give the Belle the heat.&rdquo; Having gotten thus
- far, Surething fell into a mighty fit of coughing; his face congested and
- his eyes rolled. For a moment I feared that apoplexy&mdash;my father&rsquo;s
- death&mdash;might take him in the midst of his hopeful enterprise and
- deprive me of this chance of riches. I was not a little relieved therefore
- when he somewhat recovered and went on: &ldquo;That trick&rsquo;s as safe as
- seven-up,&rdquo; continued Surething. &ldquo;You&rsquo;ll be alone up here, as everybody
- else will be down about the finish. The drivers, driving like mad, won&rsquo;t
- see you&mdash;won&rsquo;t see anything but their horses&rsquo; ears. You must get
- Rupert&mdash;get him three times&mdash;every time he comes&rsquo;round&mdash;understand?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- I understood.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Right you are,&rdquo; concluded Surething. &ldquo;And to make it worth your while,
- here are tickets on the Belle that call for five hundred dollars if she
- wins. And here&rsquo;s a dollar also for a drink and another feed to steady your
- wrists for the stonethrowing.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It will seem strange and may even attract resentment that I, a college
- graduate and come of good folk, should accept such commission from a felon
- like Surething Pete. All I say is that I did accept it; was glad to get
- it; and for two hours before the great contest between Prince Rupert and
- Creole Belle was called, I lay ensconced in my buttonwood ambush, armed of
- three stones like David without the sling, ready to play my part towards
- the acquirement of those promised hundreds. And with that, my thoughts
- were on my mother. The money would count handsomely to procure me proper
- clothes and take me home. To me the proposed bombardment of the nervous
- Rupert appeared an opportunity heaven-sent when my need was most.
- </p>
- <p>
- For fear of discovery and woe to follow, I put my tickets in the hands of
- one who, while as poor as I, could yet be trusted. He was, if the Belle
- won, to cash them; and should I be observed at my sleight of hand work and
- made to fly, he would meet me in a near-by village with the proceeds.
- </p>
- <p>
- At prompt two o&rsquo;clock the race was called. There were bustling crowds of
- spectators; but none came near my hiding place, as Surething Pete had
- foreseen. The horses got off with the second trial. They trotted as
- steadily as clockwork. As the pair rounded the second curve they were
- coming like the wind; drivers leaning far forward in their sulkies, eagle
- of glance, steady of rein, soothing with encouraging words, and &ldquo;sending
- them,&rdquo; as the phrase is, for every inch. It was a splendid race and
- splendidly driven, with Rupert on the pole and a half length to the good.
- They flashed by my post like twin meteors.
- </p>
- <p>
- As they passed I stepped free of my buttonwood; and then, as unerringly as
- one might send a bullet&mdash;for I had not been long enough from school
- to forget how to throw&mdash;my first pebble, full two ounces, caught the
- hurrying Rupert in mid-rib.
- </p>
- <p>
- Mighty were the results. Prince Rupert leaped into the air&mdash;stumbled&mdash;came
- almost to a halt&mdash;then into the air a second time&mdash;and following
- that, went galloping and pitching down the course, his driver sawing and
- whipping in distracted alternation. Meanwhile, Creole Belle slipped away
- like a spirit in harness and finished a wide winner. I took in results
- from my buttonwood. There was no untoward excitement about the grandstand
- or among the judges. Good; I was not suspected!
- </p>
- <p>
- There ensued a long wait; planted close to my tree I wearied with the
- aching length of it. Then Rupert and the Belle were on the track again.
- The gong sounded; I heard the word &ldquo;Go!&rdquo; even in my faraway hiding; the
- second heat was on. It was patterned of the first; the two took the curve
- and flew for the head of the stretch as they did before; Rupert on the
- pole and leading with half a length. I repeated the former success. The
- stone struck poor Rupert squarely. He shot straight toward the skies and
- all but fell in the sulky when he came down. It was near to ending
- matters; for Rupert regained his feet in scantiest time to get inside the
- distance flag before the Belle streamed under the wire.
- </p>
- <p>
- Creole Belle! two straight heats! What a row and a roar went up about the
- pools! What hedging was done! From five to three on Rupert the odds
- shifted to seven to two on Creole Belle. I could hear the riot and
- interpret it. I clung closely to the protecting buttonwood; there was
- still a last act before the play was done.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the third heat. The pace, comparatively, was neither hot nor hard;
- the previous exertions of both Rupert and the Belle had worn away the wire
- edge and abated their appetites for any utmost speed. Relatively, however,
- conditions were equal and each as tired as the other; and as Rupert was
- the quicker in the get-away and never failed of the pole in the first
- quarter, the two as they neared me offered the old picture of Rupert on
- the rail and leading by half his length.
- </p>
- <p>
- Had I owned a better chance of observation, I might have noted as Prince
- Rupert drew near the buttonwood that his mind was not at ease. He
- remembered those two biting flints; they were lessons not lost on him. As
- I stepped from concealment to hurl my last stone, it is to be believed
- that Rupert&mdash;his alarmed eyes roving for lions in his path&mdash;glimpsed
- me. Certain it is that as the missile flew from my hand, Rupert swerved
- across the track, the hub of his sulky narrowly missing the shoulder of
- the mare.
- </p>
- <p>
- The sudden shift confused my markmanship, and instead of Rupert, the stone
- smote the driver on the ear and all but swept him from his seat. It did
- the work, however; whether from the stone, the whip, or that state of
- general perturbation wherein his fell experiences had left his nerves,
- Rupert went fairly to pieces. Before he was on his feet again and squared
- away, the Belle had won.
- </p>
- <p>
- Peeping from my hiding place I could tell that my adroit interference in
- the late contest was becoming the subject of public concern. Rupert&rsquo;s
- driver, still sitting in his sulky, was holding high his whip in
- professional invocation of the judges&rsquo; eyes. And that ill-used horseman
- was talking; at intervals he pointed with the utmost feeling towards my
- butonwood. Nor was his oratory without power; he had not discoursed long
- when amid an abundance of shouts and oaths and brandished canes, one
- thousand gentlemen of the turf were under head in my direction.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was interesting, but I did not stay in contemplation of the spectacle;
- I out and bolted. I crossed the track and ran straight for the end fence.
- This latter barrier looked somewhat high; I made no essay to climb, but,
- picking a broadest board, launched myself against it, shoulder on. The
- board fell and I was through the gap and in an open field.
- </p>
- <p>
- But why waste time with that hustling hue and cry? It was futile for all
- its indignant energy; I promise you, I made good my distance. Young,
- strung like a harp, with a third of a mile start and able to speed like a
- deer, I ran the hunt out of sight in the first ten minutes. It was all
- earnestness, that flight of mine. I fled through three villages and a puny
- little river that fell across my path. I welcomed the river, for I knew it
- would cool the quest.
- </p>
- <p>
- Of a verity! I got my money, and my stone throwing was not to be in vain.
- True, the driver and the owner of Rupert both protested, but the track
- statutes were inexorable. The judges could take no cognizance of that
- cannonading from the buttonwood and gave the race&mdash;three straight
- heats&mdash;to Creole Belle. Surething Pete won his thousands; and as for
- me, my friend and I encountered according to our tryst and he brought me
- my money safe. Within fifteen hours from that time when I dealt disaster
- to Rupert from the sheltering buttonwood, clothed and in respectable
- tears, I was kneeling by my mother&rsquo;s side and taking what sorrowful joy I
- might for having arrived while she was yet equal to the bestowal of her
- blessing.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- It was to be our last evening about the great stone fireplace; the last of
- our stories would be told. The roads were now broken, and though a
- now-and-then upset was more than likely to enliven one&rsquo;s goings about,
- sleighs and sleds as schemes of conveyance were pronounced to be among
- things possible. As we drew our chairs about the blaze, the jangle of an
- occasional leash of bells showed how some brave spirit was even then
- abroad.
- </p>
- <p>
- Under these inspiring conditions, the Sour Gentleman and the Red Nosed
- Gentleman declared their purpose of on the morrow pressing for the railway
- station eighteen miles away. To this end they had already chartered a
- sleigh, and the word was out that it be at the Inn door by ten of the
- morning clock.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myself, nothing was driving me of business or concern, and I was in no
- haste to leave; and the Old Cattleman and his ward, Sioux Sam, were also
- of a mind to abide where they were for a farther day or two at least. But
- the going of the Sour Gentleman and the Red Nosed Gentleman would destroy
- our circle, wherefore we were driven to regard this as &ldquo;our last evening,&rdquo;
- and to crown it honorably the Jolly Doctor brewed a giant bowl of what he
- described as punch. The others, both by voice and the loyalty wherewith
- they applied themselves to its disappearance, avowed its excellencies, and
- on that point Sioux Sam and I were content to receive their words.
- </p>
- <p>
- The Red Nosed Gentleman&mdash;who had put aside his burgundy in compliment
- to the Jolly Doctor and his punch, and seemed sensibly exhilarated by this
- change of beverage&mdash;was the first to give the company a story. It was
- of his younger, green-cloth days, and the title by which he distinguished
- it was &ldquo;When I Ran the Shotgun.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0023" id="link2HCH0023"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXIII.&mdash;WHEN I RAN THE SHOTGUN.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span>bout this time the
- city of Providence fell midspasm in a fit of civic morality. Communities,
- like individuals, are prone to starts of strenuous virtue, and Providence,
- bewailing her past iniquities, was pushing towards a pure if not a festive
- life. And because in this new mood to be excellent it was the easiest,
- nearest thing, Providence smote upon the gambling brotherhood with the
- heavy hand of the police. The faro games and wheels of roulette were swept
- away and more than one who had shared their feverish profits were sent
- into captivity. Yea forsooth! the gay fraternity of fortune whose staff of
- life was cards found themselves borne upon with the burden of bad days.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myself I conceived this to be the propitious moment to open a faro
- room of my own. I had been for long of the guild of gamblers yet had never
- soared to the brave heights of proprietorship. I had bucked the games, but
- never dealt them. It came to me as a thought that in the beating midst of
- this moral tempest dwelt my opportunity. Had I chosen a day of police
- apathy&mdash;an hour of gambling security&mdash;for such a move, I would
- have been set upon by every established proprietor. He would have resented
- my rivalry as a game warden would the intromissions of a poacher. And I&rsquo;d
- have been wiped out&mdash;devoured horn and hide and hoof as by a band of
- wolves.
- </p>
- <p>
- Under these new conditions of communal virtue, however, and with the clan
- of former proprietors broken and dispersed, the field was free of menace
- from within; I would face no risk more grievous than the constabulary.
- These latter I believed I might for a season avoid; particularly if I
- unveiled my venture in regions new and not theretofore the home of such
- lawless speculation.
- </p>
- <p>
- Filled with these thoughts, I secured apartments sufficiently obscure and
- smuggled in the paraphernalia under cloud of night. The room was small&mdash;twenty
- feet square; there was space for no more than one faro table, and with
- such scant furnishing I went to work. For reasons which now escape me I
- called my place &ldquo;The Shotgun.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Heretofore I gave you assurance of the lapse of years since last I gambled
- at any game save the Wall Street game of stocks. I quit cards for that
- they were disreputable and the gains but small. Stocks, on the contrary,
- are endorsed as &ldquo;respectable;&rdquo; at stocks one may gamble without forfeiture
- of position; also, there exist no frontiers to the profits which a cunning
- stock plan well executed may bring.
- </p>
- <p>
- In my old simpler days, I well recall those defences of the pure gambler
- wherein my regard indulged. Elia once separated humanity into two tribes&mdash;those
- who borrow and those who lend. In my younger philosophy I also saw two
- septs: those who lose and those who win. To me all men were gamblers. Life
- itself was one continuous game of chance; and the stakes, that shelter and
- raiment and food and drink to compose the body&rsquo;s bulwark against an
- instant conquest by Death. Of the inherent morality of gambling I nurtured
- no doubts. Or, at the worst, I felt certain of its comparative morality
- when laid beside such commerces as banks and markets and fields of plain
- barter and sale. There is no trade (I said) save that of the hands which
- is held by the tether of any honesty. The carpenter sawing boards, the
- smith who beats out a horseshoe, the mason busy with trowel and mortar on
- sun-blistered scaffolds, hoarsely shouting &ldquo;More bricks!&rdquo; they in their
- way of life are honest. They are bound to integrity because they couldn&rsquo;t
- cheat if they would. But is the merchant selling the false for the real&mdash;the
- shoddy for the true&mdash;is the merchant whose advertisements are as so
- many false pretences paid for by the line&mdash;is he more honest than the
- one who cheats with cards? Is the lawyer looking looks of wisdom to hide
- the emptiness of his ignorance? Is the doctor, profound of mien, who
- shakes portentous head, medicining a victim not because he has a malady
- but because he has a million dollars?
- </p>
- <p>
- And if it become a question of fashion, why then, age in and age out, the
- gambler has been often noble and sometimes royal. In the days of the
- Stuarts, or later among the dull ones of Hanover, was it the peasant or
- the prince who wagered his gold at cards? Why man! every royal court was a
- gambling house; every king, save one&mdash;and he disloved and at the last
- insane&mdash;a gambler. Are not two-thirds of the homes of our American
- nobility&mdash;our folk of millions and Fifth Avenue&mdash;replete of faro
- and roulette and the very hotbed of a poisonous bridge whist? Fy, man, fy!
- you who denounce gambling but preach your own plebeianism&mdash;proclaim
- your own vulgarity! The gambler has been ever the patrician.
- </p>
- <p>
- With but one table, whereat I would preside as dealer, I required no
- multitude to man The Shotgun. I called to my aid three gentlemen of
- fortune&mdash;seedy and in want they were and glad to earn a dollar. One
- was to be sentinel at the door, one would perch Argus-like on the
- lookout&rsquo;s stool, while the third,&mdash;an old suspicious camp-follower of
- Chance,&mdash;kept the case. This latter, cautious man! declined my
- service unless I put steel bars on the only door, and as well on the only
- window. These he conceived to be some safeguard against invasions. They
- were not; but I spent money to put them in place to the end that his
- fluttered nerves be stilled and he won to my standard. And at that, he
- later pursued his business as case-keeper with an ear on the door and an
- eye on the small barred window, sitting the while half aloof from the
- table and pushing the case-buttons as the cards fell from the box with a
- timid forefinger and as though he proposed no further immersion in current
- crime than was absolutely demanded by the duties of his place. He sat
- throughout the games a picture of apprehension.
- </p>
- <p>
- For myself, and to promote my profits, I gave both my people and my
- customers every verbal bond of safety. The story went abroad that I was
- &ldquo;protected;&rdquo; that no wolf of the police dared so much as glance at flock
- of mine. The Shotgun was immune of arrest, so ran the common tale, and as
- much as leer and look and smile and shrug of shoulder might furnish them I
- gave the story wings.
- </p>
- <p>
- This public theory of safety was necessary to success. In the then hectic
- conditions, and briskly in the rear of a stern suppression of resorts that
- had flourished for decades unshaken of the law, wanting this feeling of
- security there would have come not one dollar to take its hopeful chances
- at The Shotgun. As it was, however, the belief that I lived amply
- &ldquo;protected&rdquo; took prompt deep root. And the fact that The Shotgun opened in
- the face of storms which smote without pity upon others, was itself
- regarded as proof beyond dispute. No one would court such dangers unless
- his footing were as unshakable as Gibraltar. Thereupon folk with a heart
- for faro came blithely and stood four deep about my one table; vast was
- the business I accomplished and vast were the sums changed in. And behold!
- I widely prospered.
- </p>
- <p>
- When I founded The Shotgun, I was richer of hope than of money; but
- fortune smiled and within a fortnight my treasure was told by thousands.
- Indeed, my patrons played as play those who are starved to gamble; that
- recess of faro enforced of the police had made them hawk-hungry. And my
- gains rolled in.
- </p>
- <p>
- While I fostered the common thought that no interference of the law would
- occur and The Shotgun was sacred ground, I felt within my own breast a
- sense of much unsafety. Damocles with his sword&mdash;hung of a hair and
- shaken of a breeze&mdash;could have been no more eaten of unease. I knew
- that I was wooing disaster, challenging a deepest peril. The moment The
- Shotgun became a part of police knowledge, I was lost.
- </p>
- <p>
- Still, I dealt on; the richness of my rewards the inducement and the
- optimism of the born gambler giving me courage to proceed. It fed my
- vanity, too, and hugely pleased my pride to be thus looked upon as eminent
- in my relations with the powers that ruled. They were proud, even though
- parlous days, those days when I ran The Shotgun.
- </p>
- <p>
- While I walked the field of my enterprise like a conqueror, I was not
- without the prudence that taketh account in advance and prepareth for a
- fall. Aside from the table whereon dwelt the layout, box and check rack,
- and those half-dozen chairs which encircled it, the one lone piece of
- furniture which The Shotgun boasted was a rotund lounge. Those who now and
- then reposed themselves thereon noted and denounced its nard unfitness.
- There was neither softness nor spring to that lounge; to sit upon it was
- as though one sat upon a Saratoga trunk. But it was in a farthest corner
- and distant as much as might be from the game; and therefore there arose
- but few to try its indurated merits and complain.
- </p>
- <p>
- That lounge of unsympathetic seat was my secret&mdash;my refuge&mdash;my
- last resort. I alone was aware of its construction; and that I might be
- thus alone, I had been to hidden and especial pains to bring it from New
- York myself. That lounge was no more, no less than a huge, capacious box.
- You might lift the seat and it would open like a trunk. Within was ample
- room for one to lie at length. Once in one could let down the cover and
- lock it on the inside; that done, there again it stood to the casual eye,
- a lounge, nothing save a lounge and neither hint nor token of the fugitive
- within.
- </p>
- <p>
- My plan to save myself when the crash should come was plain and sure.
- There were but two lights&mdash;gas jets, both&mdash;in The Shotgun; these
- were immediately above the table, low hung and capped with green shades to
- save the eyes of players. The light was reflected upon the layout; all
- else was in the shadow. This lack of light was no drawback to my
- popularity. Your folk who gamble cavil not at shadows for themselves so
- long as cards and deal-box are kept strongly in the glare. In event of a
- raid, it was my programme to extinguish the two lights&mdash;a feat easily
- per-formable from the dealer&rsquo;s chair&mdash;and seizing the money in the
- drawer, grope my way under cover of darkness for that excellent lounge and
- conceal myself. It would be the work of a moment; the folk would be
- huddled about the table and not about the lounge; the time lost by the
- police while breaking through those defences of bars and bolts would be
- more than enough.
- </p>
- <p>
- By the time the lights were again turned on and the Goths in possession, I
- would have disappeared. No one would know how and none know where. When
- the blue enemy, despairing of my apprehension, had at last withdrawn with
- what prisoners had been made, I would be left alone. I might then uncover
- myself and take such subsequent flight as best became my liberty and its
- continuance.
- </p>
- <p>
- Often I went over this plan in my thoughts&mdash;a fashion of mental
- rehearsal, as it were&mdash;and the more I considered the more certain I
- became that when the pinch arrived it would not fail. As I&rsquo;ve stated, none
- shared with me my secret of that hinged and hollow couch; it was my
- insurance&mdash;my cave of retreat in any tornado of the law; and the
- knowledge thereof steadied me and aided my courage to compose those airs
- of cheerful confidence which taught others safety and gave countenance to
- the story of my unqualified and sure &ldquo;protection!&rdquo; Alas! for the hour that
- unmasked me; from that moment The Shotgun fell away; my stream of golden
- profits ran dry; from a spectacle of reverence and respect I became the
- nine-day byword of my tribe!
- </p>
- <p>
- It was a crowded, thriving midnight at The Shotgun. I had been running an
- uninterrupted quartette of months; and having had good luck to the point
- of miracles, my finances were flourishing with five figures in their
- plethoric count. From a few poor hundreds, my &ldquo;roll&rdquo; when I snapped the
- rubber band about it and planted it deep within the safety of my pocket,
- held over fifty thousand dollars. Quite a fortune; and so I thought
- myself.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was, I repeat, a busy, winning midnight at The Shotgun. There were
- doubtless full forty visitors in the cramped room. These were crowded
- about the table, for the most part playing, reaching over each other&rsquo;s
- shoulders or under each other&rsquo;s elbows, any way and every way to get their
- wagers on the layout. I was dealing, while to right and left sat my
- henchmen of the lookout and the case.
- </p>
- <p>
- As on every evening, I lived on the feather-edge of apprehension, fearing
- a raid. My eye might be on the thirteen cards and the little fortunes they
- carried, but my ear was ever alert for a first dull footfall that would
- tell of destruction on its lowering way.
- </p>
- <p>
- There had been four hours of brisk, remunerative play&mdash;for the game
- began at eight&mdash;when, in the middle of a deal, there came the rush of
- heavy feet and a tumult of stumblings and blunderings on the stair. It was
- as if folk unaccustomed to the way&mdash;it being pitch dark on the
- stairway for caution&rsquo;s sake&mdash;and in vast eagerness to reach the door,
- had tripped and fallen. Also, if one might judge from the uproar and
- smothered, deep profanity of many voices there were a score engaged.
- </p>
- <p>
- To my quick intelligence, itself for long on the rack of expectancy and
- therefore doubly keen, there seemed but one answer to the question, of
- that riot on the stair. It was the police; the Philistines were upon me;
- my gold mine of The Shotgun had become the target of a raid!
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the labor of an instant. With both hands I turned out the lights;
- then stuffing my entire fortune into my pockets I began to push through
- the ranks of bewildered gentlemen who stood swearing in frightened
- undertones expecting evil. Silently and with a cat&rsquo;s stealth, I found my
- way in the pitch blackness to the lounge. As I had foreseen, no one was
- about it to discover or to interfere. Softly I raised the cover; in a
- moment I was within. Lying on my side for comfort&rsquo;s sake, I again turned
- ear to passing events. I had locked the lounge and believed myself
- insured.
- </p>
- <p>
- Meanwhile, within the room and in the hall beyond my grated door, the
- tumult gathered and grew. There came various exclamations.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Who doused those glims?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Light up, somebody.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Also, there befell a volley of blows and kicks and thumps on The Shotgun&rsquo;s
- iron portals; and gruff commands:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Open the door!&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then some one produced a match and relighted the gas. I might tell that by
- a ray about the size and color of a wheat-straw which suddenly bored its
- yellow way through a hole in my shelter. The clamor still proceeded at the
- door; it seemed to augment.
- </p>
- <p>
- Since there could be no escape&mdash;for every soul saw himself caught
- like a rat in a trap&mdash;the door was at last unbarred and opened,
- desperately. Of what avail would it be to force the arresting party to
- break its way? In despair the door was thrown wide and each of those
- within braced himself to meet his fate. After all, to visit a gambling
- place was not the great crime; the cornered ones might feel fairly secure.
- It was the &ldquo;proprietor&rdquo; for whom the law kept sharpest tooth!
- </p>
- <p>
- When the door opened, it opened to the admission of a most delightful
- disappointment. There appeared no police; no grim array of those sky-hued
- watch-dogs of the city&rsquo;s peace and order rushed through in search of
- quarry. Instead came innocently, deviously, and with uncertain, shuffling
- steps, five separate drunken gentlemen. There had been a dinner; they had
- fed deeply, drunk deeply; it was now their pleasure to relax themselves at
- play. That was all; they had sought The Shotgun with the best of motives;
- the confusion on the stair was the offspring of darkness and drink when
- brought to a conjunction. Now they were within, and reading in the faces
- about them&mdash;even through the mists of their condition&mdash;the
- terrors their advent inspired, the visiting sots were much abashed; they
- stood silent, and like the lamb before the shearer, they were dumb and
- opened not their mouths.
- </p>
- <p>
- But discovering a danger past, the general mood soon changed. There was a
- space of tacit staring; then came a rout of laughter. Every throat, lately
- so parched, now shouted with derision. The common fear became the common
- jeer.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then up started the surprised question:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Where&rsquo;s Jack?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It had origin with one to be repeated by twenty.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Where&rsquo;s Jack?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The barred window was still barred; I had not gone through the door; how
- had I managed my disappearance? It was witchery!&mdash;or like the
- flitting of a ghost! Even in my refuge I could feel the awe and the chill
- that began to creep about my visitors as they looked uneasily and
- repeated, as folk who touch some graveyard mystery:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Where&rsquo;s Jack?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- There was no help; fate held me in a corner and never a crack of escape!
- Shame-faced, dust-sprinkled and perspiring like a harvest hand&mdash;for
- my hiding place was not Nova Zembla&mdash;I threw back the top of the
- lounge and stood there&mdash;the image of confusion&mdash;the &ldquo;man with a
- pull&rdquo;&mdash;the ally of the powers&mdash;the &ldquo;protected&rdquo; proprietor of The
- Shotgun! There was a moment of silence; and next fell a whirlwind of
- mirth.
- </p>
- <p>
- There is no argument for saying more. I was laughed out of Providence and
- into New York. The Shotgun was laughed out of existence. And with it all,
- I too, laughed; for was it not good, even though inadvertent comedy? Also,
- was it not valuable comedy to leave me better by half a hundred thousand
- dollars&mdash;that comedy of The Shotgun? And thereupon, while I closed my
- game, I opened my mouth widely and laughed with the others. In green-cloth
- circles the story is still told; and whenever I encounter a friend of
- former days, I&rsquo;m inevitably recalled to my lounge-holdout and that
- midnight stampede of The Shotgun.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s where the west,&rdquo; observed the Old Cattleman, who had given
- delighted ear to the Red Nosed Gentleman&rsquo;s story, &ldquo;that&rsquo;s where the west
- has the best of the east. In Arizona a passel of folks engaged in testin&rsquo;
- the demerits of farobank ain&rsquo;t runnin&rsquo; no more resks of the constables
- than they be of chills an&rsquo; fever.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;There are laws against gambling in the west?&rdquo; This from the Jolly Doctor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Shore, thar&rsquo;s laws.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Why, then, aren&rsquo;t they enforced?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This yere&rsquo;s the reason,&rdquo; responded the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;Thar&rsquo;s so much
- more law than force, that what force exists is wholly deevoted to a
- round-up of rustlers an&rsquo; stage hold-ups an&rsquo; sech. Besides, it&rsquo;s the
- western notion to let every gent skin his own eel, an&rsquo; the last thing
- thought of is to protect you from yourse&rsquo;f. No kyard sharp can put a crimp
- in you onless you freely offers him a chance, an&rsquo; if you-all is willin&rsquo;,
- why should the public paint for war? In the east every gent is tryin&rsquo; to
- play some other gent&rsquo;s hand; not so in that tolerant region styled the
- west. Which it ain&rsquo;t too much to say that folks get killed&mdash;an&rsquo;
- properly&mdash;in the west for possessin&rsquo; what the east calls virchoos.&rdquo;
- And here the Old Cattleman shook his head sagely over a western
- superiority. &ldquo;The east mixes itse&rsquo;f too much in a gent&rsquo;s private affairs.
- Now if Deef Smith an&rsquo; Colonel Morton&rdquo; he concluded, &ldquo;had ondertook to pull
- off their dooel in the east that Texas time, the east would have come down
- on &rsquo;em like a failin&rsquo; star an&rsquo; squelched it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;And what was this duel you speak of?&rdquo; asked the Sour Gentleman. &ldquo;I, for
- one, would be most ready to hear the story.1&rsquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which it&rsquo;s the story of &lsquo;When the Capitol Was Moved.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0024" id="link2HCH0024"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXIV.&mdash;WHEN THE CAPITOL WAS MOVED.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>hen the joobilant
- Texans set down to kyarve out the destinies of that empire they wrests
- from the feeble paws of the Mexicans an&rsquo; Santa Anna, they decides on
- Austin for the Capitol an&rsquo; Old Houston to be President. An&rsquo; I&rsquo;ll say right
- yere, Old Houston, by all roomer an&rsquo; tradition, is mighty likely the most
- presidential president that ever keeps a republic guessin&rsquo; as to whatever
- is he goin&rsquo; to do next. Which he&rsquo;s as full of surprises as a night in Red
- Dog.
- </p>
- <p>
- About the first dash outen the box, Old Houston gets himse&rsquo;f into trouble
- with two Lone Star leadin&rsquo; citizens whose names, respective, is Colonel
- Morton an&rsquo; jedge Webb.
- </p>
- <p>
- Old Houston himse&rsquo;f on the hocks of them vict&rsquo;ries he partic&rsquo;pates in, an&rsquo;
- bein&rsquo; selected president like I say, grows as full of vanity as a prairie
- dog. Shore! he&rsquo;s a hero; the drawback is that his notion of demeanin&rsquo;
- himse&rsquo;f as sech is to spread his tail feathers an&rsquo; strut. Old Houston gets
- that puffed up, an&rsquo; his dignity is that egreegious, he feels crowded if a
- gent tries to walk on the same street with him.
- </p>
- <p>
- Colonel Morton an&rsquo; Jedge Webb themse&rsquo;fs wades through that carnage from
- soda to hock freein&rsquo; Texas, an&rsquo; they sort o&rsquo; figgers that these yere
- services entitles them to be heard some. Old Houston, who&rsquo;s born with a
- notion that he&rsquo;s doo&rsquo; to make what public uproar every o&rsquo;casion demands,
- don&rsquo;t encourage them two patriots. He only listens now an&rsquo; then to Morton;
- an&rsquo; as for Jedge Webb, he jest won&rsquo;t let that jurist talk at all.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; for these yere followin&rsquo; reasons to wit,&rdquo; explains Old Houston, when
- some Austin sports puts it to him p&rsquo;lite, but steadfast, that he&rsquo;s onjust
- to Webb. &ldquo;I permits Morton to talk some, because it don&rsquo;t make a splinter
- of difference what Morton says. He can talk on any side of any subject an&rsquo;
- no one&rsquo;s ediot enough to pay the least attention to them remarks. But this
- sityooation is changed when you-all gets to Webb. He&rsquo;s a disaster. Webb
- never opens his mouth without subtractin&rsquo; from the sum total of hooman
- knowledge.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0015" id="linkimage-0015"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0369.jpg" alt="0369 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0369.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- When Morton hears of them remarks he re-gyards himse&rsquo;f as wronged.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; if Old Houston,&rdquo; observes Morton, who&rsquo;s a knife fighter an&rsquo; has
- sliced offensive gents from time to time; &ldquo;an&rsquo; if Old Houston ain&rsquo;t more
- gyarded in his remarks, I&rsquo;ll take to disapprovin&rsquo; of his conduct with a
- bowie.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As I intimates, Old Houston is that pride-blown that you-all couldn&rsquo;t stay
- on the same range where he is. An&rsquo; he&rsquo;s worried to a standstill for a
- openin&rsquo; to onload on the Texas public a speciment of his dignity. At last,
- seein&rsquo; the chances comin&rsquo; some slow, he ups an&rsquo; constructs the opportunity
- himse&rsquo;f.
- </p>
- <p>
- Old Houston&rsquo;s home-camp, that a-way, is at a hamlet named Washin&rsquo;ton down
- on the Brazos. It&rsquo;s thar he squanders the heft of his leesure when not
- back of the game as President over to Austin. Thar&rsquo;s a clause in the
- constitootion which, while pitchin&rsquo; onto Austin as the public&rsquo;s
- home-ranche or capitol, permits the President in the event of perils
- onforeseen or invasions or sech, to round up the archives an&rsquo; move the
- capitol camp a whole lot. Old Houston, eager to be great, seizes onto this
- yere tenet.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll jest sort o&rsquo; order the capitol to come down, yere where I live at,&rdquo;
- says Old Houston, &ldquo;an&rsquo; tharby call the waverin&rsquo; attention of the Lone Star
- public to who I be.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As leadin&rsquo; up to this atrocity an&rsquo; to come within the constitootion, Old
- Houston allows that Austin is menaced by Comanches. Shore, it ain&rsquo;t
- menaced none; Austin would esteem the cleanin&rsquo; out of that entire Comanche
- tribe as the labors of a holiday. But it fills into Old Houston&rsquo;s hand to
- make this bluff as a excuse. An&rsquo; with that, he issues the order to bring
- the whole gov&rsquo;ment layout down to where he lives.
- </p>
- <p>
- No, as I tells you-all before, Austin ain&rsquo;t in no more danger of Comanches
- than she is of j&rsquo;inin&rsquo; the church. Troo, these yere rannikaboo savages
- does show up in paint an&rsquo; feathers over across the Colorado once or twice;
- but beyond a whoop or two an&rsquo; a little permiscus shootin&rsquo; into town which
- nobody minds, them vis&rsquo;tations don&rsquo;t count.
- </p>
- <p>
- To give you-all gents a idee how little is deemed of Comanches by them
- Texas forefathers, let me say a word of Bill Spence who keeps a store in
- Austin. Bill&rsquo;s addin&rsquo; up Virg Horne&rsquo;s accounts one afternoon in his books.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;One pa&rsquo;r of yaller-top, copper-toe boots for Virg, joonior, three
- dollars; one red cal&rsquo;co dress for Missis Virg, two dollars,&rdquo; goes on Bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- At this epock Bill hears a yowl; glancin&rsquo; out of the winder, he counts a
- couple of hundred Injuns who&rsquo;s proselytin&rsquo; about over on t&rsquo;other side of
- the river. Bill don&rsquo;t get up none; he jests looks annoyed on account of
- that yellin&rsquo; puttin&rsquo; him out in his book-keepin&rsquo;.
- </p>
- <p>
- As a bullet from them savages comes singin&rsquo; in the r&rsquo;ar door an&rsquo; buries
- itse&rsquo;f in a ham, Bill even gets incensed.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Hiram,&rdquo; he calls to his twelve-year old son, who&rsquo;s down cellar drawin&rsquo;
- red-eye for a customer; &ldquo;Hiram, you-all take pop&rsquo;s rifle, raise the
- hindsight for three hundred yards, an&rsquo; reprove them hostiles. Aim low,
- Hiram, an&rsquo; if you fetches one, pop&rsquo;ll give you a seegyar an&rsquo; let you smoke
- it yourse&rsquo;f.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Bill goes back to Virg Horne&rsquo;s account, an&rsquo; Hiram after slammin&rsquo; away with
- Bill&rsquo;s old Hawkins once or twice comes in an&rsquo; gets his seegyar.
- </p>
- <p>
- No; Old Houston does wrong when he flings forth this yere ukase about
- movin&rsquo; the capitol. Austin, even if a gent does have to dodge a arrer or
- duck a bullet as he prosecootes his daily tasks, is as safe as a
- camp-meetin&rsquo;.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Old Houston makes the order, one of his Brazos pards reemonstrates
- with him.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which Austin will simply go into the air all spraddled out,&rdquo; says this
- pard.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;If Austin sails up in the air an&rsquo; stays thar,&rdquo; says Old Houston, &ldquo;still
- you-all can gamble that this yere order goes.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You hears,&rdquo; says another, &ldquo;Elder Peters when he tells of how a Mexican
- named Mohammed commands the mountain to come to him? But the mountain
- calls his bluff; that promontory stands pat, an&rsquo; Mohammed has to go to the
- mountain.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;My name&rsquo;s Sam Houston an&rsquo; it ain&rsquo;t Mo-hommed,&rdquo; retorts Old Houston.
- &ldquo;Moreover, Mohammed don&rsquo;t have no written constitootion.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Nacherally, when Austin gets notice of Old Houston&rsquo;s plan, that
- meetropolis r&rsquo;ars back an&rsquo; screams. The faro-bank folks an&rsquo; the tavern
- folks is speshul malignant, an&rsquo; it ain&rsquo;t no time before they-all convenes
- a meetin&rsquo; to express their views on Old Houston. Morton an&rsquo; Jedge Webb
- does the oratory. An&rsquo; you hear me! that assembly is shore sultry. Which
- the epithets they applies to Old Houston kills the grass for twenty rods
- about.
- </p>
- <p>
- Austin won&rsquo;t move.
- </p>
- <p>
- Austin resolves to go to war first; a small army is organized with Morton
- in command to gyard the State House an&rsquo; the State books that a-way, an&rsquo;
- keep Old Houston from romancin&rsquo; over an&rsquo; packin&rsquo; &rsquo;em off a heap.
- </p>
- <p>
- Morton is talkin&rsquo; an&rsquo; Webb is presidin&rsquo; over this yere convocation&mdash;which
- the said meetin&rsquo; is that large an&rsquo; enthoosiastic it plumb chokes up the
- hall an&rsquo; overflows into the street&mdash;when all of a sudden a party
- comes swingin&rsquo; through the open winder from the top of a scrub-oak that
- grows alongside the buildin&rsquo;, an&rsquo; drops light as a cat onto the platform
- with Morton an&rsquo; Webb. At this yere interruption, affairs comes to a halt,
- an&rsquo; the local sports turns in to consider an&rsquo; count up the invader.
- </p>
- <p>
- This gent who swoops through the winder is dark, big, bony an&rsquo; tall; his
- ha&rsquo;r is lank an&rsquo; long as the mane of a hoss; his eyes is deep an&rsquo; black;
- his face, tanned like a Injun&rsquo;s, seems hard as iron. He&rsquo;s dressed in
- leather from foretop to fetlock, is shod with a pa&rsquo;r of Comanche
- moccasins, an&rsquo; besides a &rsquo;leven inch knife in his belt, packs a
- rifle with a 48-inch bar&rsquo;l. It will weigh twenty pounds, an&rsquo; yet this
- stranger handles it like it&rsquo;s a willow switch.
- </p>
- <p>
- As this darksome gent lands in among Morton an&rsquo; Webb, he stands thar
- without sayin&rsquo; a word. Webb, on his part, is amazed, while Morton glowers.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Whatever do you-all regyard as a market price for your skelp?&rsquo;&rdquo; says
- Morton to the black interloper, at the same time loosenin&rsquo; his knife.
- </p>
- <p>
- The black stranger makes no reply; his hand flashes to his bowie, while
- his face still wears its iron look.
- </p>
- <p>
- Webb, some hurried, pushes in between Morton an&rsquo; the black stranger. Webb
- is more for peace an&rsquo; don&rsquo;t believe in beginnin&rsquo; negotiations with a
- knife.
- </p>
- <p>
- Webb dictates a passel of p&rsquo;lite queries to this yere black stranger.
- Tharupon, the black stranger bows p&rsquo;lite an&rsquo; formal, an&rsquo; goin&rsquo; over to the
- table writes down in good English, &ldquo;I&rsquo;m deef an&rsquo; dumb.&rdquo; Next, he searches
- outen his war-bags a letter. It&rsquo;s from Old Houston over on the Brazos. Old
- Houston allows that onless Austin comes trailin&rsquo; in with them records
- within three days, he&rsquo;ll ride over a whole lot an&rsquo; make the round-up
- himse&rsquo;f. Old Houston declar&rsquo;s that Austin by virchoo of them Comanches is
- as on-safe as a Christian in Mississippi, an&rsquo; he don&rsquo;t aim to face no sech
- dangers while performin&rsquo; his dooties as President of the Commonwealth.
- </p>
- <p>
- After the black stranger flings the letter on the table, he&rsquo;s organizin&rsquo;
- to go out through the winder ag&rsquo;in. But Morton sort o&rsquo; detains him. Morton
- writes on the paper that now the black stranger is through his dooties as
- a postman, he will, if he&rsquo;s a dead game sport, stay over a day, an&rsquo; him
- an&rsquo; Morton will entertain themse&rsquo;fs by pullin&rsquo; off a war of their own. The
- idee strikes the black stranger as plenty good, an&rsquo; while his face still
- wears its ca&rsquo;m, hard look, he writes onder Morton&rsquo;s bluff:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Rifles; no&rsquo;th bank of the Colorado; sun-down, this evenin&rsquo;.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The next moment he leaps from the platform to the winder an&rsquo; from thar to
- the ground, an&rsquo; is gone.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But Colonel Morton,&rdquo; reemonstrates Webb, who&rsquo;s some scand&rsquo;lized at Morton
- hookin&rsquo; up for blood with this yere black stranger; &ldquo;you-all shorely don&rsquo;t
- aim to fight this party? He&rsquo;s deef an&rsquo; dumb, which is next to bein&rsquo; locoed
- outright. Moreover, a gent of your standin&rsquo; can&rsquo;t afford to go ramblin&rsquo;
- about, lockin&rsquo; horns with every on-known miscreant who comes buttin&rsquo; in
- with a missif from President Houston, an&rsquo; then goes stampedin&rsquo; through a
- winder by way of exit.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Onknown!&rdquo; retorts Morton. &ldquo;That letterpackin&rsquo; person is as well known as
- the Rio Grande. That&rsquo;s Deef Smith.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Colonel Morton,&rdquo; observes Webb, some horrified when he learns the name of
- the black stranger, &ldquo;this yere Deef Smith is a shore shot. They say he can
- empty a Comanche saddle four times in five at three hundred yards.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That may be as it may,&rdquo; returns Morton. &ldquo;If I downs him, so much the more
- credit; if he gets me, at the worst I dies by a famous hand.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The sun is restin&rsquo; on the sky-line over to the west. Austin has done
- crossed the Colorado an&rsquo; lined up to witness this yere dooel. Deef Smith
- comes ridin&rsquo; in from some&rsquo;ers to the no&rsquo;th, slides outen the saddle, pats
- his hoss on the neck, an&rsquo; leaves him organized an&rsquo; ready fifty yards to
- one side. Then Deef Smith steps to the center an&rsquo; touches his hat,
- mil&rsquo;tary fashion, to Morton an&rsquo; Webb.
- </p>
- <p>
- These yere cavaliers is to shoot it out at one hundred yards. As they
- takes their places, Morton says:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Jedge Webb, if this Deef Smith party gets me, as most like he will, send
- my watch to my mother in Looeyville.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then they fronts each other; one in brown leather, the other in cloth as
- good as gold can buy. No one thinks of any difference between &rsquo;em,
- however, in a day when courage is the test of aristocracy.
- </p>
- <p>
- Since one gent can&rsquo;t hear, Webb is to give the word with a handkerchief.
- At the first flourish the rifles fall to a hor&rsquo;zontal as still an&rsquo; steady
- as a rock. Thar&rsquo;s a brief pause; then Webb drops his handkerchief.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thar is a crack like one gun; Deef Smith&rsquo;s hat half turns on his head as
- the bullet cuts it, while Morton stands a moment an&rsquo; then, without a
- sound, falls dead on his face. The lead from Deef Smith&rsquo;s big rifle drills
- him through the heart. Also, since it perforates that gold repeater, an&rsquo;
- as the blood sort o&rsquo; clogs the works, the Austin folks decides it&rsquo;s no use
- to send it on to Looeyville, but retains it that a-way as a keepsake.
- </p>
- <p>
- With the bark of the guns an&rsquo; while the white smoke&rsquo;s still hangin&rsquo; to
- mark the spot where he stands, Deef Smith&rsquo;s hoss runs to him like a dog.
- The next instant Deef Smith is in the saddle an&rsquo; away. It&rsquo;s jest as well.
- Morton&rsquo;s plenty pop&rsquo;lar with the Austin folks an&rsquo; mebby some sharp, in the
- first hysteria of a great loss, overlooks what&rsquo;s doo to honor an&rsquo; ups an&rsquo;
- plugs this yere Deef Smith.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- The Old Cattleman made a long halt as indicative that his story was at an
- end. There was a moment of silence, and then the Jolly Doctor spoke up.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;But how about the books and papers?&rdquo; asked the Jolly Doctor.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Oh, nothin&rsquo; partic&rsquo;lar,&rdquo; said the Old Cattleman. &ldquo;It turns out like Old
- Houston prophesies. Three days later, vain an&rsquo; soopercilious, he rides in,
- corrals them archives, an&rsquo; totes &rsquo;em haughtily off to the Brazos.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Following the Old Cattleman&rsquo;s leaf from Lone Star annals, the Sour
- Gentleman prepared himself to give us his farewell page from the unwritten
- records of the Customs.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;On this, our last evening,&rdquo; observed the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;it seems the
- excellent thing to tell you what was practically my final act of service
- or, if you will, disservice with the Customs. We may call the story &lsquo;How
- the Filibusterer Sailed.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0025" id="link2HCH0025"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXV.&mdash;HOW THE FILIBUSTERER SAILED.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>t will come to you
- as strange, my friends, to hear objection&mdash;as though against an ill
- trait&mdash;to that open-handed generosity which is held by many to be
- among the marks of supreme virtue. Generosity, whether it be evidenced by
- gifts of money, of sympathy, of effort or of time, is only another word
- for weakness. If one were to go into careful consideration of the
- life-failure of any man, it would be found most often that his fortunes
- were slain by his generosity; and while, without consideration, he gave to
- others his countenance, his friendship, his money, his toil or whatever he
- conferred, he in truth but parted with his own future&mdash;with those raw
- materials wherewith he would otherwise have fashioned a victorious career.
- Generosity, in a commonest expression, is giving more than one receives;
- it is to give two hundred and get one hundred; he is blind, therefore, who
- does not see that any ardor of generosity would destroy a Rothschild.
- </p>
- <p>
- From birth, and as an attribute inborn, I have been ever too quick to
- give. For a first part of my life at least, and until I shackled my
- impulse of liberality, I was the constant victim of that natural
- readiness. And I was cheated and swindled with every rising sun. I gave
- friendship and took pretense; I parted with money for words; ever I
- rendered the real and received the false, and sold the substance for the
- shadow to any and all who came pleasantly to smile across my counter. I
- was not over-old, however, when these dour truths broke on me, and I began
- to teach myself the solvent beauty of saying &ldquo;No.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- During those months of exile&mdash;for exile it was&mdash;which I spent in
- Washington Square, I cultivated misanthropy&mdash;a hardness of spirit;
- almost, I might say, I fostered a hatred of my fellow man. And more or
- less I had success. I became owner of much stiffness of sentiment and a
- proneness to be practical; and kept ever before me like a star that, no
- matter how unimportant I might be to others, to myself at least I was most
- important of mankind. Doubtless, I lost in grace by such studies; but in
- its stead I succeeded to safety, and when we are at a final word, we live
- by what we keep and die by what we quit, and of all loyalties there&rsquo;s no
- loyalty like loyalty to one&rsquo;s self.
- </p>
- <p>
- While I can record a conquest of my generosity and its subjugation to
- lines of careful tit-for-tat, there were other emotions against which I
- was unable to toughen my soul. I became never so redoubtable that I could
- beat off the assaults of shame; never so puissant of sentiment but I was
- prey to regrets. For which weaknesses, I could not think on the affairs of
- The Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars and The German Girl&rsquo;s Diamonds, nor on the sordid
- money I pouched as their fruits, without the blush mounting; nor was I
- strong enough to consider the latter adventure and escape a stab of sore
- remorse. Later could I have found the girl I would have made her
- restitution. Even now I hear again that scream which reached me on the
- forward deck of the &ldquo;Wolfgang&rdquo; that September afternoon.
- </p>
- <p>
- But concerning the Cuban filibusterer, his outsailing against Spain; and
- the gold I got for his going&mdash;for these I say, I never have
- experienced either confusion or sorrow. My orders were to keep him in; I
- opened the port&rsquo;s gate and let him out; I pocketed my yellow profits. And
- under equal conditions I would do as much again. It was an act of war
- against Spain; yet why should one shrink from one&rsquo;s interest for a reason
- like that? Where was the moral wrong? Nations make war; and what is right
- for a country, is right for a man. That is rock-embedded verity, if one
- will but look, and that which is dishonest for an individual cannot be
- honest for a flag. You may&mdash;if you so choose&mdash;make war on Spain,
- and with as much of justice as any proudest people that ever put to sea.
- The question of difference is but a question of strength; and so you be
- strong enough you&rsquo;ll be right enough, I warrant! For what says the poet?
- </p>
- <p>
- <br />
- </p>
- <p class="indent25">
- &ldquo;Right follows might
- </p>
- <p class="indent25">
- Like tail follows kite.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br />
- </p>
- <p>
- It is a merest truism; we hear it in the storm; the very waves are its
- witnesses. Everywhere and under each condition, it is true. The proof lies
- all about. We read it on every page of history; behold it when armies
- overthrow a throne or the oak falls beneath the axe of the woodman. Do I
- disfavor war? On the contrary, I approve it as an institution of greatest
- excellence. War slays; war has its blood. But has peace no victims? Peace
- kills thousands where war kills tens; and if one is to consider misery,
- why then there be more starvation, more cold, more pain, and more
- suffering in one year of New York City peace than pinched and gnawed
- throughout the whole four years of civil war. And human life is of
- comparative small moment. We say otherwise; we believe otherwise; but we
- don&rsquo;t act otherwise. Action is life&rsquo;s text. Humanity is itself the
- preacher; in that silent sermon of existence&mdash;an existence of world&rsquo;s
- goods and their acquirement&mdash;we forever show the thing of least
- consequence to be the life of man. However, I am not myself to preach, I
- who pushed forth to tell a story. It is the defect of age to be garrulous,
- and as one&rsquo;s power to do departs, its place is ever taken by a weakness to
- talk.
- </p>
- <p>
- This filibusterer whom I liberated to sail against Spain, I long ago told
- you was called Ryan. That, however, is a fictitious name; there was a
- Ryan, and the Spaniards took his life at Santiago. And because he with
- whom I dealt was also put up against a wall and riddled with Spanish lead,
- and further, because it is not well to give his true name, I call him Ryan
- now. His ship rode on her rope in New York bay; I was given the Harriet
- Lane to hold him from sailing away; his owners ashore&mdash;merchants
- these and folk on &rsquo;change&mdash;offered me ten thousand dollars;
- the gold was in bags, forty pounds of it; I turned my back at evening and
- in the morning he was gone.
- </p>
- <p>
- You have been told how I never thought on those adventures of The
- Emperor&rsquo;s Cigars, and The German Girl&rsquo;s Diamonds, without sensations of
- shame, and pain. Indeed! they were engagements of ignobility! Following
- the latter affair I felt a strongest impulse to change somewhat my
- occupation. I longed for an employment a bit safer and less foul. I
- counted my fortunes; I was rich with over seventy thousand dollars; that
- might do, even though I gained no more. And so it fell that I was almost
- ready to leave the Customs, and forswear and, if possible, forget, those
- sins I had helped commit in its name.
- </p>
- <p>
- In the former days, my home tribe was not without consequence in Old
- Dominion politics. And while we could not be said to have strengthened
- ourselves by that part we took against the Union, still, now that peace
- was come, the family began little by little to regather a former weight.
- It had enough at this time to interfere for my advantage and rescue me
- from my present duty. I was detailed from Washington to go secretly to
- Europe, make the careless tour of her capitols, and keep an eye alive to
- the interests of both the Treasury and the State Department.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was a gentleman&rsquo;s work; this loafing from London to Paris, and from
- Paris to Berlin, with an occasional glance into Holland and its diamond
- cutting. And aside from expenses&mdash;which were paid by the government&mdash;I
- drew two salaries; one from the Customs and a second from the Secret
- Service. My business was to detect intended smuggling and cable the story,
- to the end that Betelnut Jack and Lorns and Quin and the others make
- intelligent seizures when the smugglers came into New York. The better to
- gain such news, I put myself on closest terms&mdash;and still keep myself
- a secret&mdash;with chief folk among houses of export; I went about with
- them, drank with them, dined with them; and I wheedled and lay in ambush
- for information of big sales. I sent in many a good story; and many a rich
- seizure came off through my interference. Also I lived vastly among
- legation underlings, and despatched what I found to the Department of
- State. There was no complaint that I didn&rsquo;t earn my money from either my
- customs or my secret service paymaster. In truth! I stood high in their
- esteem.
- </p>
- <p>
- At times, too, I was baffled. There was a lady, the handsome wife of a
- diamond dealer in Maiden Lane. She came twice a year to Europe. Obviously
- and in plain view&mdash;like the vulgarian she was not&mdash;this
- beautiful woman, as she went aboard ship in New York, would wear at throat
- and ears and on her hands full two hundred thousand dollars&rsquo; worth of
- stones&mdash;apparently. And there they seemed to be when she returned;
- and, of course, never a dime of duty. We were morally sure this beautiful
- woman was a beautiful smuggler; we were morally sure those stones were
- paste when she sailed from New York; we were morally sure they were
- genuine, of purest water, when she returned; we were morally sure the
- shift was made in Paris, and that a harvest of thousands was garnered with
- every trip. But what might we do? We had no proof; we could get none; we
- could only guess.
- </p>
- <p>
- And there were other instances when we slipped. More than once I tracked a
- would-be smuggler to his ship and saw him out of port. And yet, when
- acting on my cables, the smuggler coming down the New York gang-plank was
- snapped up by my old comrades and searched, nothing was found. This
- mystery, for mystery it was, occurred a score of times. At last we learned
- the trick. The particular room occupied by the smuggler was taken both
- ways for a round dozen trips ahead. There were seven members of the
- smuggling combine. When one left the room, his voyage ended, and came
- ashore in New York, another went duly aboard and took possession for the
- return trip. The diamonds had not gone ashore. They were hidden in a sure
- place somewhere about the room; he who took it to go to Europe knew where.
- And in those several times to follow when the outgoer was on and off the
- boat before she cleared, he found no difficulty in carrying the gems
- ashore. The Customs folk aren&rsquo;t watching departures; their vigilance is
- for those who arrive. However, after a full score of defeats, we solved
- this last riddle, and managed a seizure which lost the rogues what profits
- they had gathered on all the trips before.
- </p>
- <p>
- Also, as I pried about the smuggling industry, I came across more than one
- interesting bit of knowledge. I found a French firm making rubies&mdash;actual
- rubies. It was a great secret in my time, though more is known of it now.
- The ruby was real; stood every test save the one test&mdash;a hard one to
- enforce&mdash;of specific gravity. The made ruby was a shadow lighter,
- bulk for bulk, than the true ruby of the mines. This made ruby was called
- the &ldquo;scientific ruby;&rdquo; and indeed! it was scientific to such a degree of
- delusion that the best experts were for long deceived and rubies which
- cost no more than two hundred dollars to make, were sold for ten thousand
- dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- As a curious discovery of my ramblings, I stumbled on a diamond, the one
- only of its brood. It was small, no more than three-quarters of a carat.
- But of a color pure orange and&mdash;by day or by night&mdash;blazing like
- a spark of fire. That stone if lost could be found; it is the one lone
- member of its orange house. What was its fate? Set in the open mouth of a
- little lion&rsquo;s head, one may now find it on the finger of a prince of the
- Bourse.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was while in Madrid, during my European hunting, that those seeds were
- sown which a few months later grew into a smart willingness to let down
- the bars for my filibusterer&rsquo;s escape. I was by stress of duty held a
- month in Madrid. And, first to last, I heard nothing from the natives when
- they spoke of America but malediction and vilest epithet. It kept me
- something warm, I promise, for all I had once ridden saber in hand to
- smite that same American government hip and thigh. I left Madrid when my
- work was done with never a moment&rsquo;s delay; and I carried away a profound
- hate for Spain and all things Spanish.
- </p>
- <p>
- As I was brought home by commands from my superiors at the end of my
- Madrid work, these anti-Spanish sentiments had by no means cooled when I
- made the New York wharf. Decidedly if I&rsquo;d been searched for a sentiment, I
- would have been discovered hostile to Spanish interest when, within three
- weeks following my home-coming, I was given the Harriet Lane, shown the
- suspect and his ship, and told to have a sleepless eye and seize him if he
- moved.
- </p>
- <p>
- It&rsquo;s the Norse instinct to hate Spain; and I was blood and lineage,
- decisively Norse. That affair of instinct is a mighty matter. It is
- curious to note how one&rsquo;s partisanship will back-track one&rsquo;s racial trail
- and pick up old race feuds and friendships; hating where one&rsquo;s forbears
- hated, loving where they loved. Even as a child, being then a devourer of
- history, I well recall how&mdash;while loathing England as the foe of this
- country&mdash;I still went with her in sympathy was she warring with
- France or Spain. I remember, too, that, in England&rsquo;s civil wars, I was
- ever for the Roundhead and against the King. This, you say, sounds
- strangely for my theory, coming as I do from Virginia, that state of the
- Cavalier. One should reflect that Cavalierism&mdash;to invent a word&mdash;is
- naught save a Southern boast. Virginia, like most seaboard Southern
- states, was in its time a sort of Botany Bay whereunto, with other
- delinquents, political prisoners were condemned; my own ancestors coming,
- in good truth! by edict of the Bloody Jeffreys for the hand they took in
- Monmouth&rsquo;s rebellion. It is true as I state, even as a child, too young
- for emotions save emotions of instinct, I was ever the friend, as I read
- history, first of my own country; and next of England, Germany, Holland,
- Denmark and Sweden-Nor-way&mdash;old race-camps of my forefathers, these&mdash;and
- like those same forefathers the uncompromising foe of France, Spain,
- Italy, and the entire Latin tribe, as soon as ever my reading taught me
- their existence.
- </p>
- <p>
- My filibusterer swung on his cable down the bay from Governor&rsquo;s Island.
- During daylight I held the Harriet Lane at decent distance; when night
- came down I lay as closely by him as I might and give the ships room as
- they swept bow for stern with the tide. Also, we had a small-boat patrol
- in the water.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the fourth day of my watch. I was ashore to stretch my legs, and at
- that particular moment, grown weary of walking, on a bench in Battery
- Park, from which coign I had both my filibusterer and the Harriet Lane
- beneath my eye, and could signal the latter whenever I would.
- </p>
- <p>
- On the bench with me sat a well-dressed stranger; I had before observed
- him during my walk. With an ease that bespoke the trained gentleman, and
- in manner unobtrusive, my fellow bencher stole into talk with me.
- Sharpened of my trade, he had not discoursed a moment before I felt and
- knew his purpose; he was friend to my filibusterer whose black freeboard
- showed broadside on as she tugged and strove with her cable not a mile
- away.
- </p>
- <p>
- He carried the talk to her at last.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t believe she&rsquo;s a filibusterer,&rdquo; he said. Her character was common
- gossip, and he had referred to that. &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t believe she&rsquo;s a
- filibusterer. I&rsquo;d be glad to see her get out if I thought she were,&rdquo; and
- he turned on me a tentative eye.
- </p>
- <p>
- Doubtless he observed a smile, and therein read encouragement. I told him
- my present business; not through vain jauntiness of pride, but I was aware
- that he well knew my mission before ever he sat down, and I thought I&rsquo;d
- fog him up a bit with airs of innocence, and lead him to suppose I
- suspected him not.
- </p>
- <p>
- After much tacking and going about, first port and then starboard&mdash;to
- use the nautical phrase&mdash;he came straight at me.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Friend,&rdquo; he said; &ldquo;the cause of liberty&mdash;Cuban liberty, if you will&mdash;is
- dear to me. If that ship be a filibusterer and meant for Cuba&rsquo;s aid,
- speaking as a humanitarian, I could give you ten thousand reasons, the
- best in the world, why you should let her sail.&rdquo; This last, wistfully.
- </p>
- <p>
- Thereupon I lighted a cigar, having trouble by reason of the breeze. Then
- getting up, I took my handkerchief and wig-wagged the Harriet Lane to send
- the gig ashore. As I prepared to go down to the water-front, I turned to
- my humanitarian who so loved liberty.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Give your reasons to Betelnut Jack,&rdquo; I said; &ldquo;he delights in abstract
- deductions touching the rights of man as against the rights of states as
- deeply as did that Thetford Corset maker, Thomas Paine.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Betelnut Jack!&rdquo; said my humanitarian. &ldquo;He shall have every reason within
- an hour.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Should you convince him,&rdquo; I retorted, &ldquo;tell him as marking a fact in
- which I shall take the utmost interest to come to this spot at five
- o&rsquo;clock and show me his handkerchief.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Then I joined the Harriet Lane.
- </p>
- <p>
- At the hour suggested, Betelnut Jack stood on the water&rsquo;s edge and flew
- the signal. I put the captain&rsquo;s glass on him to make sure. He had been
- given the reasons, and was convinced. There abode no doubt of it; the
- humanitarian was right and Cuba should be free. Besides, I remembered
- Madrid and hated Spain.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Captain,&rdquo; I observed, as I handed that dignitary the glasses, &ldquo;we will,
- if you please, lie in the Narrows to-night. If this fellow leave&mdash;which
- he won&rsquo;t&mdash;he&rsquo;ll leave that way. And we&rsquo;ll pinch him.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- The Captain bowed. We dropped down to the Narrows as the night fell black
- as pitch. The Captain and I cracked a bottle. As we toasted each other,
- our suspect crept out through the Sound, and by sunrise had long cleared
- Montauk and far and away was southward bound and safe on the open ocean.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I believe,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor to the Sour Gentleman when the
- latter paused, &ldquo;I believe you said that the Filibusterer was in the end
- taken and shot.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Seized when he made his landing,&rdquo; returned the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;and
- killed against a wall in the morning.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It was a cheap finish for a 10,000-dollar start,&rdquo; remarked the Red Nosed
- Gentleman, sententiously. &ldquo;But why should this adventurer, Ryan, as you
- call him, go into the business of freeing Cuba? Where would lie his
- profit? I don&rsquo;t suppose now it was a love of liberty which put him in
- motion.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;The Cuban rebellionists,&rdquo; said the Sour Gentleman, &ldquo;were from first to
- last sustained by certain business firms in New York who had arranged to
- make money by their success. It is a kind of piracy quite common, this
- setting our Spanish-Americans to cutting throats that a profit may flow in
- Wall and Broad streets. Every revolution and almost every war in South and
- Central America have their inspirations in the counting-rooms of some
- great New York firm. I&rsquo;ve known rival houses in New York to set a pair of
- South American republics to battling with each other like a brace of game
- cocks. Thousands were slain with that war. Sure, it is the merest blackest
- piracy; the deeds of Kidd or Morgan were milk-white by comparison.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It shows also,&rdquo; observed the Jolly Doctor, &ldquo;how little the race has
- changed. In our hearts we are the same vikings of savage blood and
- pillage, and with no more of ruth, we were in the day of Harold Fairhair.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Sioux Sam, at the Old Cattleman&rsquo;s suggestion, came now to relate the story
- of &ldquo;How Moh-Kwa Saved the Strike Axe.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0026" id="link2HCH0026"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXVI.&mdash;HOW MOH-KWA SAVED STRIKE-AXE.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>his shall be the
- story of how Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, saved Strike Axe from the medicine of
- Yellow Face, the bad medicine man, who would take his life an&rsquo; steal the
- Feather, his squaw. An&rsquo; it is a story good to show that you should never
- lose a chance to do a kind deed, since kind deeds are the steeps up which
- the Great Spirit makes you climb to reach the happiness at the top. When
- you do good, you climb up; when you do bad, you climb down; an&rsquo; at the top
- is happiness which is white, an&rsquo; at the bottom is pain which is black, an&rsquo;
- the Great Spirit says every man shall take his choice.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe is of the war-clan an&rsquo; is young. Also he is a big fighter next
- to Ugly Elk who is the war chief. An&rsquo; Strike Axe for all he is only a
- young man an&rsquo; has been but four times on the war trail, has already taken
- five skelps&mdash;one Crow, one Blackfoot, three Pawnees. This makes big
- talk among all the Sioux along the Yellowstone, an&rsquo; Strike Axe is proud
- an&rsquo; gay, for he is held a great warrior next to Ugly Elk; an&rsquo; it is the
- Pawnees an&rsquo; Crows an&rsquo; Blackfeet who say this, which makes it better than
- if it is only the talk of the Sioux.
- </p>
- <p>
- When Ugly Elk sets up the war-pole, an&rsquo; calls to his young men to make
- ready to go against the Pawnees to take skelps an&rsquo; steal ponies, Strike
- Axe is the first to beat the war-pole with his stone club, an&rsquo; his war
- pony is the first that is saddled for the start.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe has a squaw an&rsquo; the name of the squaw is the Feather. Of the
- girls of the Sioux, the Feather is one of the most beautiful. Yet she is
- restless an&rsquo; wicked, an&rsquo; thinks plots an&rsquo; is hungry
- </p>
- <p>
- Yellow Face, the bad medicine man, has made a spell over the Feather.
- Yellow Face hates Strike Axe because of so much big talk about him. Also,
- he loves the Feather an&rsquo; would have her for his squaw. He tells her she is
- like the sunset, but she will not hear; then he says she is like the
- sunrise, but still she shakes her head, only she shakes it slow; so at
- last Yellow Face tells her she is like the Wild Rose, an&rsquo; at that she
- laughs an&rsquo; listens.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0016" id="linkimage-0016"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0397.jpg" alt="0397 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0397.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- But the Feather will not leave Strike Axe an&rsquo; go with Yellow Face, for
- Strike Axe is a big fighter; an&rsquo; moreover, he kills many elk an&rsquo; buffalo,
- an&rsquo; his lodge is full of beef an&rsquo; robes, an&rsquo; the Feather is no fool.
- Besides, at this time her heart is not bad, but only restless.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Yellow Face sees he must give her a bad heart or he will never win
- the Feather. So Yellow Face kills the Great Rattlesnake of the Rocks, who
- is his brother medicine, an&rsquo; cooks an&rsquo; feeds his heart to the Feather.
- Then she loves Yellow Face an&rsquo; hates Strike Axe, an&rsquo; would help the Yellow
- Face slay him. For the heart of the Great Rattlesnake of the Rocks is
- evil, an&rsquo; evil breeds evil where it touches, an&rsquo; so the Feather&rsquo;s heart
- turns black like the snake&rsquo;s heart which she swallowed from the hand of
- Yellow Face.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe does not know what the Feather an&rsquo; Yellow Face say an&rsquo; do, for
- he is busy sharpening his lance an&rsquo; making arrows to shoot against the
- Pawnees, an&rsquo; his ears an&rsquo; eyes have no time to run new trails. But Strike
- Axe can tell that the Feather&rsquo;s heart is against him; an&rsquo; this makes him
- to wonder, because he is a big fighter; an&rsquo; besides he has more than any
- Sioux, meat an&rsquo; furs an&rsquo; beads an&rsquo; blankets an&rsquo; paint an&rsquo; feathers, all of
- which are good to the eyes of squaws, an&rsquo; the Feather is no fool. An&rsquo;,
- remembering these things, Strike Axe wonders an&rsquo; wonders; but he cannot
- tell why the heart of the Feather is against him. An&rsquo; at last Strike Axe
- puts away the puzzle of the Feather&rsquo;s heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is a trail in running water,&rdquo; says Strike Axe, &ldquo;an&rsquo; no one may follow
- it. The heart of a squaw is a bird an&rsquo; flies in the air an&rsquo; no one may
- trace it.&rdquo; With that, Strike Axe washes his memory free of the puzzle of
- the Feather&rsquo;s heart an&rsquo; goes away to the big trees by the Yellowstone to
- hunt.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe tells the Feather he will be gone one moon; for now while her
- heart is against him his lodge is cold an&rsquo; his blankets hard an&rsquo; the fire
- no longer burns for Strike Axe, an&rsquo; his own heart is tired to be alone.
- </p>
- <p>
- It is among the big trees by the Yellowstone that Strike Axe meets
- Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, while Moh-Kwa is hunting for a bee tree. But he
- can&rsquo;t find one, an&rsquo; he is sad an&rsquo; hungry an&rsquo; tells Strike Axe he fears the
- bees have gone far away to live with the Pawnees.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Strike Axe says &ldquo;No!&rdquo; an&rsquo; takes Moh-Kwa to a bee-tree he has found;
- an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa sings in his joy, an&rsquo; climbs an&rsquo; eats until he is in pain;
- while Strike Axe stands a long way off, for the bees are angry an&rsquo; their
- knives are out.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa is grateful to Strike Axe when his pain from much honey is gone,
- an&rsquo; says he will come each day, an&rsquo; eat an&rsquo; fight with the bees while
- there is honey left. An&rsquo; Moh-Kwa asks Strike Axe to remember that he is
- the Great Wise Bear of the Yellowstone, an&rsquo; to tell him what is evil with
- him so Moh-Kwa can do him good.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe thinks very hard; then he tells Moh-Kwa how the Feather&rsquo;s heart
- is against him an&rsquo; has left him; he would know what the Feather will do
- an&rsquo; where her heart has gone.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa puts his paw above his eyes to keep out the sun so he can think
- better; an&rsquo; soon Moh-Kwa remembers that the wife of the Great Rattlesnake
- of the Rocks, when he met her hunting rats among the cliffs, told him she
- was now a widow, for Yellow Face had killed the Great Rattlesnake of the
- Rocks&mdash;who was his brother medicine&mdash;an&rsquo; fed his heart to the
- Feather.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa tells Strike Axe how the Feather was bewitched by Yellow Face.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Come now with me,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa to Strike Axe, &ldquo;an&rsquo; I will show you what
- the Feather an&rsquo; Yellow Face do while you are gone. You are a young buck
- an&rsquo; a good buck, an&rsquo; because of your youth an&rsquo; the kind deed you did when
- you found for me the bees&mdash;to whom I shall go back an&rsquo; fight with for
- more honey to-morrow and every day while it lasts&mdash;I will show you a
- danger like a lance, an&rsquo; how to hold your shield so you may come safe from
- it.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa took Strike Axe by the hand an&rsquo; led him up a deep canyon an&rsquo; into
- his cavern where a big fire burned in the floor&rsquo;s middle for light. An&rsquo;
- bats flew about the roof of Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s cavern an&rsquo; owls sat on points of
- rock high up on the sides an&rsquo; made sad talks; but Strike Axe being brave
- an&rsquo; with a good heart, was not afraid an&rsquo; went close to the fire in the
- floor&rsquo;s middle an&rsquo; sat down.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa got him a fish to eat; an&rsquo; when it was baked on the coals an&rsquo;
- eaten, brought him a pipe with kinnikinick to smoke. When that was done,
- Moh-Kwa said:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now that your stomach is full an&rsquo; strong to stand grief, I will show you
- what the Feather an&rsquo; Yellow Face do while you are gone; for they make
- medicine against you an&rsquo; reach out to kill you an&rsquo; take your life.&rdquo;
- Moh-Kwa then turned over a great stone with his black paws an&rsquo; took out of
- a hole which was under the stone, a looking glass. Moh-Kwa gave Strike Axe
- the looking glass an&rsquo; said, &ldquo;Look; for there you shall see the story of
- what the Feather an&rsquo; the wicked Yellow Face do.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe looked, an&rsquo; saw that Yellow Face was wrapping up a log in a
- blanket. When he had done this, he belted it with the belts of Strike Axe;
- an&rsquo; then he put on its head the war-bonnet of Strike Axe which hung on the
- lodge pole. An&rsquo; now that it was finished, Yellow Face said the log in the
- blanket an&rsquo; wearing the belts an&rsquo; war-bonnet was Strike Axe&mdash;as
- Strike Axe saw truly in the looking glass&mdash;an&rsquo; Yellow Face stood up
- the log in its blanket an&rsquo; belts an&rsquo; war-bonnet, an&rsquo; made his bow ready to
- kill it with an arrow. As Yellow Face did these things, the Feather stood
- watching him with a smile on her face while the blood-hope shone in her
- eyes; for she had eaten the snake&rsquo;s heart an&rsquo; all her spirit was black.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe saw what went on with the Feather an&rsquo; Yellow Face, an&rsquo; told it
- as the glass told it, word for word to Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear, who sat by
- his side to listen.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Moh-Kwa, when he knew that now Yellow Face with three arrows in his
- left hand was stringing a bow to shoot against the log which he had
- dressed up an&rsquo; named &ldquo;Strike Axe,&rdquo; said there was little time to be lost;
- an&rsquo; Moh-Kwa hurried Strike Axe to the round deep spring of clear water
- which was in the cavern, an&rsquo; told him to stand on the edge of the spring
- an&rsquo; look hard in the looking glass an&rsquo; take sharp notice just as Yellow
- Face was to shoot the arrow against the log.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; you must dive in the spring when Yellow Face shoots,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa to
- Strike Axe; &ldquo;you must dive like the loon dives when you shoot at him on
- the river.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe looked hard in the looking glass like Moh-Kwa said, an&rsquo; dived
- in the spring when the arrow left the bow of Yellow Face.
- </p>
- <p>
- When he came up, he looked again in the glass an&rsquo; saw that Yellow Face had
- missed the log. Yellow Face had a half-fear because he had missed, an&rsquo;
- Strike Axe looking in Moh-Kwa&rsquo;s glass could see the half-fear rising up as
- a mist in his eyes like a morning fog lifts up from the Yellowstone. Also,
- the Feather stood watching Yellow Face, an&rsquo; her eyes, which were grown
- hard an&rsquo; little an&rsquo; bright, like a snake&rsquo;s eyes, showed that she did not
- care what happened only so that it was evil.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Kwa told Strike Axe to still watch closely, an&rsquo; would not let his
- mind pull up its pickets an&rsquo; stray; because Yellow Face would shoot twice
- more with the arrows which were left; an&rsquo; he must be quick an&rsquo; ready each
- time to dive like the loon dives, or he would surely die by the log&rsquo;s
- wound.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe, because he had eaten the fish an&rsquo; smoked, an&rsquo; had a full
- stomach an&rsquo; was bold an&rsquo; steady with a heart made brave with much food,
- again looked hard in the glass; an&rsquo; when the second arrow left the bow of
- Yellow Face he dived sharply in the spring like a loon; an&rsquo; when he came
- up an&rsquo; held the looking glass before his eyes he saw that Yellow Face had
- missed the log a second time.
- </p>
- <p>
- An&rsquo; now there was a whole-fear in the eyes of Yellow Face&mdash;a white
- fear that comes when a man sees Pau-guk, the Death, walk into the lodge;
- an&rsquo; the hand of Yellow Face trembled as he made ready his last third arrow
- on the bow. But in the eyes of the Feather shone no fear; only she lapped
- out her tongue like the snake does, with the black pleasure of new evil at
- the door.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa warned Strike Axe to look only at Yellow Face that he might be
- sure an&rsquo; swift as the loon to dive from the last arrow. Strike Axe did as
- Moh-Kwa counselled; an&rsquo; when the last arrow flew from the bow, Strike Axe
- with a big splash was safe an&rsquo; deep beneath the waters of the spring.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;An&rsquo; now,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa to Strike Axe, &ldquo;look in the glass an&rsquo; laugh, for a
- blessing of revenge has been bestowed on you through the Great Spirit.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe looked an&rsquo; saw that not only did Yellow Face miss the log, but
- the arrow flew back an&rsquo; pierced the throat of Yellow Face, even up to the
- three eagle feathers on the arrow&rsquo;s shaft. As Strike Axe looked, he saw
- Yellow Face die; an&rsquo; a feeling like the smell of new grass came about the
- heart of Strike Axe, for there is nothing so warm an&rsquo; sweet an&rsquo; quick with
- peace as revenge when it sees an&rsquo; smells the fresh blood of its enemy.
- </p>
- <p>
- Moh-Kwa told Strike Axe to still look in the glass; for while the danger
- was gone he would know what the Feather did when now that Yellow Face was
- killed by the turning of his own medicine.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe looked, an&rsquo; saw how the Feather dammed up the water in a little
- brook near the lodge; an&rsquo; when the bed of the brook was free of water the
- Feather dug a hole in the soft ground with her hands like a wolf digs with
- his paws. An&rsquo; the Feather made it deep an&rsquo; long an&rsquo; wide; an&rsquo; then she put
- the dead Yellow Face in this grave in the brook&rsquo;s bed. When she had
- covered him with sand an&rsquo; stones, the Feather let the waters free; an&rsquo; the
- brook went back to its old trail which it loved, an&rsquo; laughed an&rsquo; ran on,
- never caring about the dead Yellow Face who lay under its wet feet.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then the Feather went again into the lodge an&rsquo; undressed the log of its
- blankets, belts an&rsquo; war-bonnet; an&rsquo; the Feather burned the bow an&rsquo; the
- arrows of Yellow Face, an&rsquo; made everything as it was before. Only now
- Yellow Face lay dead under the brook; but no one knew, an&rsquo; the brook
- itself already had forgot&mdash;for the brook&rsquo;s memory is slippery an&rsquo;
- thin an&rsquo; not a good memory, holding nothing beyond a moment&mdash;an&rsquo; the
- Feather felt safe an&rsquo; happy; for her heart fed on evil an&rsquo; evil had been
- done.
- </p>
- <p>
- Strike Axe came out from the cave with Moh-Kwa, the Wise Bear.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You have given me life,&rdquo; said Strike Axe.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;You have given me honey,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa.
- </p>
- <p>
- Then Strike Axe was troubled in his mind, an&rsquo; he told Moh-Kwa that he knew
- not what he must do with the Feather when he returned. But Moh-Kwa said
- that he should make his breast light, an&rsquo; free his thought of the Feather
- as a burden, for one would be in his lodge before him with the answer to
- his question.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It is the Widow,&rdquo; said Moh-Kwa, &ldquo;who was the wife of the Great
- Rattlesnake of the Rocks; she will go to your tepee to be close to the
- heart of her husband. In her mouth the Widow will bring a message from
- Yellow Face to the Feather for whom he died an&rsquo; was hid beneath the
- careless brook.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Thus said Moh-Kwa. An&rsquo; Strike Axe found that Moh-Kwa spoke with but one
- tongue; for when he stood again in his lodge the Feather lay across the
- door, dead an&rsquo; black with the message of Yellow Face which was sent to her
- in the mouth of the Widow. An&rsquo; as Strike Axe looked on the Feather, the
- Widow rattled joyfully where she lay coiled on the Feather&rsquo;s breast; for
- the Widow was glad because she was near to her husband&rsquo;s heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Moh-Kwa was not there to look; Moh-Kwa had gone early to the bee-tree,
- an&rsquo; now with his nose in a honey comb was high an&rsquo; hearty up among the
- angry bees.
- </p>
- <p>
- There arose no little approbative comment on the folk-lore tales of Sioux
- Sam, and it was common opinion that his were by odds and away the best
- stories to be told among us. These hearty plaudits were not without
- pleasant effect on Sioux Sam, and one might see his dark cheek flush to a
- color darker still with the joy he felt.
- </p>
- <p>
- And yet someone has said how the American Indian is stolid and cold.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was the Red Nosed Gentleman, as the clock struck midnight on this our
- last evening and we threw our last log on the coals, who suggested that
- the Jolly Doctor, having told the first story, should in all propriety
- close in the procession by furnishing the last. There was but one voice
- for it, and the Jolly Doctor, who would have demurred for that it seemed
- to lack of modesty on his side, in the end conceded the point with grace.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;This,&rdquo; said the Jolly Doctor, composing himself to a comfortable position
- in his great chair, &ldquo;this, then, shall be the story of &lsquo;The Flim Flam
- Murphy.&rsquo;&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br />
- </p>
- <hr />
- <p>
- <a name="link2HCH0027" id="link2HCH0027"> </a>
- </p>
- <div style="height: 4em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
- <h2>
- CHAPTER XXVII.&mdash;THE FLIM FLAM MURPHY.
- </h2>
- <p class="pfirst">
- <span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">C</span>hicken Bill was
- not beautiful with his shock of coarse hair and foul pipe in mouth.
- Doubtless, Chicken Bill was likewise an uncompromising villain. Indeed,
- Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin, expert both of men and mines, one evening in the Four
- Flush saloon, casually, but with insulting fullness, set these things
- forth to Chicken Bill himself; and while Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin was always
- talking, he was not always wrong.
- </p>
- <p>
- On this occasion of Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin&rsquo;s frankness, Chicken Bill, albeit
- he carried contradiction at his belt in the shape of a six-shooter, walked
- away without attempting either denial or reproof. This conduct, painful to
- the sentiment of Timberline, had the two-fold effect of confirming Pike&rsquo;s
- Peak Martin&rsquo;s utterances in the minds of men, and telling against the
- repute of Chicken Bill for that personal courage which is the great first
- virtue the Southwest demands.
- </p>
- <p>
- Old Man Granger found the earliest gold in Arizona Gulch. And hot on the
- news of the strike came Chicken Bill. It was the latter&rsquo;s boast about the
- bar-rooms of Timberline that he was second to come into the canyon; and as
- this was the only word of truth of which Chicken Bill was guilty while he
- honored the camp with his presence, it deserves a record.
- </p>
- <p>
- Following Old Man Granger&rsquo;s discovery of his Old Age mine, came not only
- Chicken Bill, but others; within a week there arose the bubbling camp of
- Timberline. There were saloons and hurdy-gurdies and stores and
- restaurants and a bank and a corral and a stage station and an express
- office and a post-office and an assay office and board sidewalks and red
- lights and many another plain evidence of civilization. Even a theatre was
- threatened; and, to add to the gayety as well as the wealth of the baby
- metropolis, those sundry cattlemen having ranges and habitats within the
- oak-brushed hills about, began to make Timberline their headquarters and
- transact their business and their debauches in its throbbing midst.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0017" id="linkimage-0017"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0411.jpg" alt="0411 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0411.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill was reasonably perfect in all accomplishments of the
- Southwest. He could work cattle; he could rope, throw, and hog-tie his
- steer; he could keep up his end at flanking, branding, and ear-marking in
- a June corral; he could saddle and ride a wild, unbroken bronco; he could
- make baking-powder biscuit so well flavored and light as to compel the
- compliments of those jealous epicures of the cow-camps who devoured them.
- </p>
- <p>
- Yet Chicken Bill would not work on the ranges. There were no cards
- permitted in the camps, and whiskey was debarred as if each bottle held a
- rattlesnake. Altogether a jovial soul, and one given to revelry, would fly
- from them in disgust.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s too lonesome a play for me, this punchin&rsquo; cattle,&rdquo; observed Chicken
- Bill, and so eschewed it.
- </p>
- <p>
- While Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin expounded this aversion on the part of Chicken
- Bill, as well as the latter&rsquo;s refusal to pick and dig and drill and blast
- in the Timberline mines, as mere laziness, public feeling, though it
- despised the culprit, was inclined to tolerate him in his shiftlessness.
- American independence in the Southwest is held to be inclusive of the
- personal right to refuse all forms of labor. Wherefore Chicken Bill was
- safe even from criticism as he hung about the saloons and faro rooms and
- lived his life of chosen vagabondage.
- </p>
- <p>
- Our low-flung hero made shift in various ways. Did he find a tenderfoot
- whom he could cheat at cards, he borrowed a stake&mdash;sometimes, when
- the subject was uncommonly tender, from the victim himself&mdash;and
- therewith took a small sum at poker or seven-up. Another method of trivial
- fraud, now and then successful with Chicken Bill, was to plant a handful
- of brass nuggets, each of about an ounce in weight, under a little
- waterfall that broke into the canyon just below the windmill. There was a
- deal of mineral in this feeble side-stream, and the brass nuggets became
- coated and queer of color.
- </p>
- <p>
- One of these Chicken Bill was able at intervals to impose at a profit upon
- a stranger, by swearing doughtily that it was virgin gold.
- </p>
- <p>
- It came to pass, however, that Chicken Bill, despairing of fortune by the
- cheap processes of penny-ante and spurious nuggets, decided on a coup. He
- would stake out a claim, drift it and timber it, and then salt it to the
- limit of all that was possible in the science of claim-salting. Then would
- he sell it to the first Christian with more money than sagacity who came
- moved to buy a mine.
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill was no amateur of mines. He knew the business as he knew the
- cow trade, and avoided it for the same reason of indolence. In his time,
- and after some windfall at faro-bank, Chicken Bill had grub-staked
- prospectors who were to &ldquo;give him half&rdquo; and who never came back. In his
- turn Chicken Bill was grub-staked by others, in which event he never came
- back. But it went with other experiences to teach him the trade, and on
- the morning when with pick and paraphernalia Chicken Bill pitched camp in
- Arizona Gulch a mile beyond the farthest, and where it was known to all no
- mineral lurked, he brought with him a knowledge of the miner&rsquo;s art, and
- began his digging with intelligent spirit. Moreover, the heart of Chicken
- Bill was stout for the work; for was he not planning a swindle? and did
- not that thought of itself swell his bosom with a mighty peace?
- </p>
- <p>
- Once upon a time Chicken Bill had had a partner.
- </p>
- <p>
- This partner was frequently on the lips of Chicken Bill, especially when
- our hero was in his cups. He was always mentioned with a gush of tears,
- this partner, and his name as furnished by Chicken Bill was Flim Flam
- Murphy. Flim Flam had met death somewhere in the Gunnison country while
- making good his name, and passed with the smoke of the Colt&rsquo;s-44 that
- dismissed him. But Chicken Bill reverenced the memory of this talented man
- and was ready to honor him, and, having staked out his claim with the
- fraudulent purpose aforesaid, filed on it appropriately as &ldquo;The Flim Flam
- Murphy.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It would be unjust to the intelligence of Timberline to permit one for a
- moment to suppose that the dullest of her male citizenry lived unaware of
- the ignoble plans of Chicken Bill. That he proposed to salt a claim and
- therewith ensnare the stranger within the local gates were truths which
- all men knew. But all men cared not; and mention of the enterprise when
- the miracle of Chicken Bill at work found occasional comment over the
- bars, aroused nothing save a sluggish curiosity as to whether Chicken Bill
- would succeed. No thought of warning the unwary arose in the Timberline
- heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s the proper play,&rdquo; observed Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin, representative of
- Timberline feeling, &ldquo;to let every gent seelect his own licker an&rsquo; hobble
- his own hoss. If Chicken Bill can down anybody for his bankroll without
- making a gun play to land the trick, thar&rsquo;s no call for the public to
- interfere.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- It was about this time that Chicken Bill added to his ornate scheme of
- claim-salting&mdash;a plain affair of the heart. The lady to thus cast her
- spell over Chicken Bill was known as Deadwood Maggie and flourished a
- popular waitress in the Belle Union Hotel. Timberline thought well of
- Deadwood Maggie, and her place in general favor found suggestion in a
- remark of Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Deadwood Maggie,&rdquo; observed that excellent spirit, as he replaced his
- glass on the Four Flush bar and turned to an individual who had been
- guilty of words derogatory to the lady in question; &ldquo;Dead-wood Maggie is a
- virchoous young female, an&rsquo; it shore frets me to hear her lightly allooded
- to.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- As Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin&rsquo;s disapproval took the violent form of smiting the
- maligner upon the head with an 8-inch pistol, the social status of the
- lady was ever after regarded as fixed.
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill was not the one to eat his heart in silence, and his passion
- was but one day old when he laid hand and fortune at Deadwood Maggie&rsquo;s
- feet. That maiden for her part displayed a suspicious front, born perhaps
- of an experience of the perfidy of man. Deadwood Maggie was inclined to a
- scorn of Chicken Bill and his proffer of instant wedlock.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Not on your life!&rdquo; was Deadwood Maggie&rsquo;s reply.
- </p>
- <p>
- But Chicken Bill persisted; he longed more ardently because of this
- rebuff. To soften Deadwood Maggie he threw a gallant arm about her and
- drew her to his bosom.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Don&rsquo;t be in sech a hurry to lose me,&rdquo; said Chicken Bill on this
- sentimental occasion.
- </p>
- <p>
- Deadwood Maggie was arranging tables at the time for those guests who from
- mine and store and bar-room would come, stamping and famishing, an hour
- later. Chicken Bill and she for the moment had the apartment to
- themselves. Goaded by her lover&rsquo;s sweet persistency, and unable to phrase
- a retort that should do her feelings justice, Deadwood Maggie fell to the
- trite expedient of breaking a butter-dish on the head of Chicken Bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Now pull your freight,&rdquo; said she, &ldquo;or I&rsquo;ll chunk you up with all the
- crockery in the camp.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Finding Deadwood Maggie obdurate, Chicken Bill for the nonce withdrew to
- consider the situation. He was in no sort dispirited; he regarded the
- butter-dish and those threats which came after it as marks of maiden
- coyness; they were decisive of nothing.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;She wasn&rsquo;t in the mood,&rdquo; said Chicken Bill, as he explained his repulse
- to the bar-keeper of the Four Flush Saloon; &ldquo;but I&rsquo;ll get my lariat on her
- yet. Next time I&rsquo;ll rope with a larger loop.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;That&rsquo;s the racket!&rdquo; said the bar-keeper.
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill in a small way was a gifted rascal. After profound
- contemplation of Deadwood Maggie in her obstinacy, he determined to win
- her with the conveyance of a one-quarter interest in The Flim Flam Murphy.
- Deadwood Maggie knew nothing of the worthlessness of The Flim Flam Murphy.
- Chicken Bill would represent it to her as a richer strike than Old Man
- Granger&rsquo;s Old Age Mine. He would give her one-quarter. There would be no
- risk; Deadwood Maggie, when once his wife and getting a good figure for
- the mine, would make no demur to selling to whatever tenderfoot he might
- dupe. This plan had merit; at least one must suppose so, for the soul of
- Deadwood Maggie was visibly softened thereby.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;I must have you, Maggie,&rdquo; wooed Chicken Bill, when he had put forth the
- sterling character of The Flim Flam Murphy and expressed himself as
- determined to bestow on her the one-fourth interest, a conveyance whereof
- in writing he held then in his hand; &ldquo;I can&rsquo;t live without you. When you
- busted me with that yootensil you made me yours forever. I swear by this
- gun I pack, I&rsquo;ll not outlive your refusal to wed me longer than to jest
- get good an&rsquo; drunk an&rsquo; put a bullet through my head.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Who could resist such love and such hyperbole? Deadwood Maggie wept; then
- she took the deed to the one-fourth interest in The Flim Flam Murphy,
- kissed Chicken Bill, and said she would drift into his arms as his wife at
- the end of two months. Chicken Bill objected strenuously to such a recess
- for his affections, but with the last of it was driven to yield.
- </p>
- <p>
- There came a time when The Flim Flam Murphy salted to the last degree of
- salt was as perfect a trap for a tenderfoot as any ever set. And as though
- luck were seeking Chicken Bill, a probable prey stepped from the stage
- next day.
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill and the stranger were seen in prompt and lengthy conference.
- Timberline, looking on, grinned in a tolerant way. For two days Chicken
- Bill and the stranger did nothing but explore the drift, inspect the
- timbering, and consider specimens taken from The Flim Flam Murphy.
- </p>
- <p>
- At last the stranger filled ten small canvas sacks with specimens of ore
- and brought them into camp on a buckboard to be assayed. Chicken Bill was
- with him; and pleading internal pains that made it impossible to ride
- upright, our wily one lay back with the bags of specimens while the
- stranger drove. From time to time the astute Chicken Bill, having
- advantage of rough places in the canyon&rsquo;s bed which engaged the faculties
- of the stranger, emptied some two or three quills of powdered gold into
- each specimen sack by the ingenius process of forcing the sharpened point
- of the quill through the web of the canvas, and blowing the treasure in
- among the ore.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s a cinch!&rdquo; ruminated Chicken Bill, when he had completed these
- improvements. Then he refreshed himself from a whiskey flask, said that he
- felt better, and climbed back beside the stranger on the buckboard&rsquo;s seat.
- </p>
- <p>
- There came the assay next day. With that ceremony Chicken Bill had nothing
- to do, and could only wait. But he owned no misgivings; there would come
- but one result; the ore would show a richness not to be resisted.
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill put in his time preparing Deadwood Maggie for the sale. He
- told her that not a cent less than sixty thousand dollars would be
- accepted.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;It&rsquo;s worth more,&rdquo; declared Chicken Bill, &ldquo;but me an&rsquo; you, Maggie, ain&rsquo;t
- got the long green to develop it. Our best play is to cash in if we can
- get the figure.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- But disaster was striding on the trail of Chicken Bill. That evening, as
- Deadwood Maggie was returning to the Belle Union from the Dutch Woman&rsquo;s
- Store, to which mart she had been driven for a tooth-brush, she was
- blasted with the spectacle of Chicken Bill and a Mexican girl in
- confidential converse just ahead. Deadwood Maggie, a bit violent of
- nature, had been in no wise calmed by her several years on the border.
- While not wildly in love, still her impulse was to dismantle, if not
- dismember, the senorita thus softly whispering and being whispered to by
- the recreant Chicken Bill. But on second thought Deadwood Maggie
- restrained herself. She would observe the full untruth of Chicken Bill.
- </p>
- <p>
- <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0018" id="linkimage-0018"> </a>
- </p>
- <div class="fig" style="width:50%;">
- <img src="images/0421.jpg" alt="0421 " width="100%" /><br />
- </div>
- <h5>
- <a href="images/0421.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a>
- </h5>
- <p>
- The next day, when Chicken Bill called on Dead-wood Maggie, he was met
- with a smothering flight of table furniture and told never to come back.
- </p>
- <p>
- It was a crisis with Chicken Bill. The assay had been a victory and the
- stranger stood ready, cash in hand, to pay the sixty thousand dollars
- demanded for The Flim Flam Murphy. Chicken Bill felt the necessity of
- getting the money without delay. Any marplot, whether from drink or that
- mean officiousness which hypocrites call &ldquo;conscience,&rdquo; might say the word
- that would arm the tenderfoot with a knowledge of his peril. But Chicken
- Bill could not come to speech with Dead-wood Maggie. In a blaze of
- jealousy, that wronged woman would begin throwing things the moment he
- appeared. As a last resort, Chicken Bill dispatched the bar-keeper of the
- Four Flush to Dead-wood Maggie. This diplomat was told to set forth the
- crying needs of the hour, Chicken Bill promising friendship for life and
- five hundred dollars if he made Deadwood Maggie see reason.
- </p>
- <p>
- Ten minutes later the bar-keeper returned, bleeding from a cut over his
- eye.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Did it with a stove-lifter,&rdquo; he explained, as he laved the wound in a
- basin at the corner of the bar. &ldquo;Say! you can&rsquo;t get near enough to that
- lady to give her a diamond ring.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill made a gesture of despair; he saw that Deadwood Maggie was
- lost to him forever.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the sale of The Flim Flam Murphy must go on. Chicken Bill sought the
- tenderfoot. He found him with a smile on his face reading the report of
- The Flim Flam Murphy assay. Chicken Bill guardedly explained that he had a
- partner, name not given, who objected to the sale. The partner held a
- one-quarter share in The Flim Flam Murphy. The stranger, who knew it all
- along from the records, pondered briefly. Finally he broke the silence:
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Would Chicken Bill sell his three-quarters?&rdquo;
- </p>
- <p>
- Chicken Bill composed his face. Chicken Bill would sell.
- </p>
- <p>
- Nothing is big in the Southwest; transactions of millions are disposed of
- while one eats a flap-jack. In an hour the stranger had acquired The Flim
- Flam Murphy interest which was vested in Chicken Bill; in two hours that
- immoralist was speeding by vague trails to regions new, forty-five
- thousand dollars in his belt and a soreness in his heart.
- </p>
- <p>
- Timberline felt a quiet amusement in the situation. It leaned back and
- waited in a superior way for the stranger to set up the low wail of the
- robbed. The outcry couldn&rsquo;t be long deferred; the fraud must be soon
- unmasked since the development of The Flim Flam Murphy was gone about with
- diligence and on a dazzling scale.
- </p>
- <p>
- But the stranger did not complain.
- </p>
- <p>
- Two weeks were added to that vast eternity which had preceded them and the
- sobered sentiment of Timberline began to think it might better
- investigate. Timberline, however, would proceed with caution; missing its
- laugh, it must now guard itself against being laughed at.
- </p>
- <p>
- It turned as the wise ones had begun to apprehend. The Flim Flam Murphy
- was a two-million dollar wonder. The talented Chicken Bill had overreached
- himself. With no hope beyond a plan to salt a claim, he had not thought to
- secure an assay for himself. The Flim Flam Murphy loomed upon mankind as
- Timberline&rsquo;s richest strike.
- </p>
- <p>
- Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin was the first to collect himself. Crawling from beneath
- that landslide of amazement which had caught and covered Timberline, he
- visited the Belle Union with a resolved air. Pointedly but fully Pike&rsquo;s
- Peak Martin tendered himself in marriage to Dead wood Maggie. That lady
- did not hurl a butter-dish; such feats would seem too effervescent on the
- part of a gentlewoman worth five hundred thousand dollars.
- </p>
- <p>
- Deadwood Maggie blushed with drooping lids as she heard the words of
- Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin.
- </p>
- <p>
- &ldquo;Which your offer shore makes a hit with me,&rdquo; murmured Deadwood Maggie.
- Then, when a moment later, her head lay on Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin&rsquo;s shoulder
- like some tired flower at rest, Deadwood Maggie gave a sigh, and lifting
- her eyes to the deep inquiring gaze of Pike&rsquo;s Peak Martin, she whispered:
- &ldquo;You&rsquo;re the only gent I ever loved.&rdquo;
- </p>
- <h3>
- THE END.
- </h3>
- <div style="height: 6em;">
- <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
- </div>
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-<pre>
-
-
-
-
-
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