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+The Project Gutenberg Ebook Monks of Catalonia &c., by La Fontaine
+#12 in our series by Jean de La Fontaine (The Tales and Novels)
+
+Copyright laws are changing all over the world. Be sure to check the
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+
+Title: The Tales and Novels, v12: Monks of Catalonia & The Cradle
+
+Author: Jean de La Fontaine
+
+Release Date: March, 2004 [EBook #5286]
+[Yes, we are more than one year ahead of schedule]
+[This file was first posted on June 21, 2002]
+
+Edition: 10
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
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+
+
+
+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TALES AND NOVELS OF FONTAINE, V12 ***
+
+
+
+This eBook was produced by David Widger
+
+
+
+
+
+ THE TALES AND NOVELS
+ OF
+ J. DE LA FONTAINE
+
+
+
+ Volume 12.
+
+ Contains:
+ The Monks of Catalonia
+ The Cradle
+
+
+
+ THE MONKS OF CATALONIA
+
+
+ TO you, my friends, allow me to detail,
+ The feats of monks in Catalonia's vale,
+ Where oft the holy fathers pow'rs displayed,
+ And showed such charity to wife and maid,
+ That o'er their minds sweet fascination reigned,
+ And made them think, they Paradise had gained.
+
+ SUCH characters oft preciously advise,
+ And youthful easy female minds surprise,
+ The beauteous FAIR encircle with their net,
+ And, of the feeling heart, possession get:
+ Work in the holy vineyard, you may guess,
+ And, as our tale will show, with full success.
+
+ IN times of old, when learning 'mong the FAIR,
+ Enough to read the testament, was rare,
+ (Times howsoe'er thought difficult to quote,)
+ A swarm of monks of gormandizing note,
+ Arrived and fixed themselves within a town,
+ For young and beauteous belles of great renown,
+ While, of gallants, there seemed but very few,
+ Though num'rous aged husbands you might view.
+
+ A NOBLE chapel soon the fathers raised,
+ To which the females ran and highly praised,
+ Surveyed it o'er and confidently thought,
+ 'Twas there, of course, salvation should be sought.
+ And when their faith had thoroughly been proved,
+ To gain their point the monks the veil removed.--
+ Good father Andrew scorned to use finesse,
+ And in discourse the sex would thus address.
+
+ IF any thing prevent your sov'reign bliss,
+ And Paradise incautiously you miss,
+ Most certainly the evil will arise,
+ From keeping for your husbands large supplies,
+ Of what a surplus you have clearly got,
+ And more than requisite to them allot,
+ Without bestowing on your trusty friends,
+ The saving that to no one blessings lends.
+
+ PERHAPS you'll tell me, marriage boons we shun;
+ 'Tis true, and Heav'n be praised enough is done,
+ Without those duties to require our share
+ You know from direful sin we guard the FAIR.
+ Ingratitude 's declared the height of crimes,
+ And God pronounced it such in early times;
+ For this eternally was Satan curst;
+ Howe'er you err, be careful of the worst.
+ Return to Heav'n your thanks for bounteous care,
+ And then to us a tithe of surplus spare,
+ Which costs you nothing worth a moment's thought;
+ And marks the zeal with which our faith is taught,
+ A claim legitimate our order opes,
+ Bestowed, for holy offices, by popes,
+ No charitable gift, but lawful right:
+ Priests well supported are a glorious sight.
+ Four times a year, exactly to a day,
+ Each wife this tithe should personally pay
+ Our holy saint requires that you submit:
+ 'Tis founded on decrees of holy writ.
+ All Nature carefully the law reveres,
+ That gratitude and fealty endears.
+
+ NOW marriage works we rank as an estate,
+ And tithe is due for that at any rate.
+ We'll take it patiently, whate'er the toil:
+ Nor be o'er nice about the justful spoil.
+ Our order have not, you must surely know,
+ By many comforts, what we wish below.
+
+ 'TIS right, however, that I now suggest,
+ Whatever passes must not be expressed;
+ But naught to husbands, parents, friends, reveal;
+ From ev'ry one the mysterious conceal.
+ Three words th' apostle taught: be these your care;
+ FAITH, CHARITY, and PRUDENCE learn to share.
+
+ THE holy father, by his fine discourse,
+ Delivered with the most impressive force,
+ Gave wonderous satisfaction and surprise,
+ And passed with all for Solomon the wise;
+ Few slept while Andrew preached, and ev'ry wife,
+ His precepts guarded as she would her life;
+ And these not solely treasured in the mind,
+ But showed to practise them the heart inclined,
+ Each hastened tithe to bring without delay,
+ And quarrelled who should be the first to pay;
+ Loud murmurs rang, and many city dames,
+ Were forced to keep till morn the friar's claims,
+ And HOLY CHURCH, not knowing what to do,
+ Such numbers seemed to be in paying cue,
+ At length was forced, without restraint, to say,
+ The Lord commands that, till a future day,
+ You give us time to breathe:--so large the lot,
+ To serve for present we enough have got;
+ Too much the whole at once, but by degrees,
+ Your tithe we'll take and all contrive to please.
+ With us arrange the hour you would be here,
+ And some to-day:--to-morrow more we'll cheer;
+ The whole in order, and you'll clearly see,
+ That SOFTLY with FAIRLY best agree.
+
+ THE sex inclined to follow this advice;
+ About receipts however they were not nice;
+ The entertainment greatly was admired,
+ And pure devotion all their bosoms fired,
+ A glass of cordial some apart received;
+ Good cheer was given, may be well believed;
+ Ten youthful dames brisk friar Fripart took,
+ Gay, airy, and engaging ev'ry look,
+ Who paid with pleasure all the monk could wish;
+ Some had fifteen:--some twelve to taste their dish;
+ Good friar Rock had twenty for his share,
+ And gave such satisfaction to the FAIR,
+ That some, to show they never grudged the price,
+ And proved their punctuality,--paid twice.
+
+ So much indeed, that satiated with ways,
+ That six long months engaged their nights and days:
+ They gladly credit would have given now,
+ But found the ladies would not this allow,
+ Believing it most positively wrong,
+ To keep whate'er might to the church belong.
+ No tithe arrears were any where around,
+ So zealous were the dames in duty found,
+ They often in advance paid holy dues,
+ How pure the monks!--how just the ladies views!
+ The friars used despatch alone with those,
+ That for their fascinating charms they chose,
+ And sent the sempiternals to bestow,
+ The tribute they had brought on those below,
+ For in the refuse tithes that were their lot,
+ The laicks oft pleasant pickings got.
+ In short 'twas difficult to say,
+ What charity was shown from day to day.
+
+ IT happened that one night a married dame,
+ Desirous to convey the monks their claim,
+ And walking with her spouse just by the spot,
+ Where dwelled the arch contrivers of the plot,
+ Good Heavens! said she, I well remember now,
+ I've business with a friar here, I vow;
+ 'Twill presently be done if you'll but wait;
+ Religious duties we must ne'er abate.
+ What duties? cried the husband with surprise;
+ You're surely mad:--'tis midnight I surmise;
+ Confess yourself to-morrow if required;
+ The holy fathers are to bed retired.
+ That makes no difference, the lady cried.--
+ I think it does, the husband straight replied,
+ And thither I'll not let you go to-night:--
+ What heinous sins so terribly affright,
+ That in such haste the mind you wish to ease?
+ To-morrow morn repair whene'er you please:
+
+ YOU do me wrong, rejoined the charming fair;
+ I neither want confession nor a prayer,
+ But anxiously desire what is due to pay;
+ For if incautiously I should delay,
+ Long time 'would be ere I the monk should see,
+ With other matters he'll so busy be.
+ But what can you the holy fathers owe?
+ To which the lady said:--what don't you know?
+ A tithe, my dear, the friars always claim.--
+ What tithe? cried he; it surely has a name.
+ Not know! astonishingly, replied the wife.--
+ To which the husband answered:--On my life,
+ That women friars pay is very strange;
+ Will you particulars with me arrange?
+ How cunningly, said she, you seem to act;
+ Why clearly you're acquainted with the fact?
+ 'Tis Hymeneal works:--What works? cried he--
+ Lord! said the dame, assuredly you see,
+ Why I had paid an hour ago or more
+ And you've prevented me when at the door;
+ I'm sure, of those who owe, I'm not the worst,
+ For I, in paying, always was the first.
+
+ THE husband quite astonished now appeared;
+ At once a hundred diff'rent ills he feared;
+ But questioning his wife howe'er, he found,
+ That many other dames who lived around,
+ Like her; in paying tithes, the monks obeyed,
+ Which consolation to his breast conveyed.
+ Poor innocent! she nothing wished to hide;
+ Said she, not one but tithe they make provide;
+ Good friar Aubrey takes your sister's dues;
+ To father Fabry Mrs. B's accrues;
+ The mayoress friar William likes to greet,
+ A monk more handsome scarcely you will meet;
+ And I to friar Gerard always go;
+ I wished this night to pay him all I owe.
+
+ ALAS! when tongues unbridled drop disguise,
+ What direful ills, what discords oft arise!
+ The cunning husband having thus obtained,
+ Particulars of what the fathers gained,
+ At first designed in secret to disclose,
+ Those scenes of fraud and matrimonial woes:
+ The mayor and citizens should know, he thought;
+ What dues were paid: what tithes the friars sought;
+ But since 'twas rather difficult to place,
+ Full credence, at the first, in such a case,
+ He judged it best to make the fellow speak,
+ To whom his wife had shown herself so weak.
+
+ FOR father Gerard in the morn he sent,
+ Who, unsuspecting, to the husband went,
+ When, in the presence of the injured wife,
+ He drew his sword and swore he'd take his life,
+ Unless the mystery he would disclose,
+ Which he reluctantly through terror chose.
+ Then having bound the friar hand and foot,
+ And in another room his lady put,
+ He sallied forth his hapless lot to tell,
+ And to the mayor exposed the wily spell;
+ The corporation next; then up and down,
+ The secret he divulged throughout the town.
+
+ A CRY for vengeance presently was heard;
+ The whole at once to slaughter, some preferred
+ While others would the place with fire surround,
+ And burn the house with those within it found.
+ Some wished to drown them, bound within their dress;
+ With various other projects you may guess;
+ But all agreed that death should be their lot,
+ And those for burning had most voices got.
+
+ WITHOUT delay they to the convent flew;
+ But when the holy mansion came in view,
+ Respect, the place of execution changed;
+ A citizen his barn for this arranged;
+ The crafty crew together were confined,
+ And in the blaze their wretched lives resigned,
+ While round the husbands danced at sound of drum,
+ And burnt whatever to their hands had come;
+ Naught 'scaped their fury, monks of all degrees,
+ Robes, mantles, capuchins, and mock decrees:
+ All perished properly within the flames;
+ But nothing more I find about the dames;
+ And friar Gerard, in another place,
+ Had met apart his merited disgrace.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+ THE CRADLE
+
+
+ NEAR Rome, of yore, close to the Florence road,
+ Was seen a humble innkeeper's abode;
+ Small sums were charged; few guests the night would stay;
+ And these could seldom much afford to pay.
+ A pleasing active partner had the host
+ Her age not much 'bove thirty at the most;
+ Two children she her loving husband bore;
+ The boy was one year old: the daughter more;
+ Just fifteen summers o'er her form had smiled;
+ In person charming, and in temper mild.
+
+ IT happened that Pinucio, young and gay,
+ A youth of family, oft passed the way,
+ Admired the girl, and thought she might be gained,
+ Attentions showed, and like return obtained;
+ The mistress was not deaf, nor lover mute;
+ Pinucio seemed the lady's taste to suit,
+ Of pleasing person and engaging air;
+ And 'mong the equals of our youthful fair,
+ As yet, not one a pref'rence had received;
+ Nor had she e'er in golden dreams believed;
+ But, spite of tender years, her mind was high,
+ And village lads she would not let come nigh.
+
+ COLUTTA, (such her name,) though much admired;
+ And many in the place her hand desired,
+ Rejected some, and others would not take,
+ And this most clearly for Pinucio's sake.
+ Long conversations she could rarely get,
+ And various obstacles the lovers met;
+ No interviews where they might be at ease,
+ But ev'ry thing conspired to fret and teaze.
+ O parents, husbands! be advised by me;
+ Constraint with wives or children won't agree;
+ 'Tis then the god of love exerts his art,
+ To find admittance to the throbbing heart.
+
+ PINUCIO and a friend, one stormy night,
+ The landlord's reached and would in haste alight;
+ They asked for beds, but were too late they found:
+ You know, sir, cried the host, we don't abound;
+ And now the very garrets we have let:
+ You'd better elsewhere try your wish to get,
+ And spite of weather, further on pursue
+ At best, our lodging is unfit for you.
+
+ HAVE you no truckle bed? the lover cried;
+ No corner left?--we fain would here abide:
+ Why, truly, said the host, we always keep
+ Two beds within the chamber where we sleep;
+ My wife and I, of course, take one of these;
+ Together lie in t'other if you please.
+ The spark replied, this we will gladly do;
+ Come, supper get; that o'er, the friends withdrew:
+ Pinucio, by Coletta's sage advice,
+ In looking o'er the room was very nice;
+ With eagle-eyes particulars he traced,
+ Then 'tween the clothes himself and friend he placed.
+ A camp-bed for the girl was on the floor;
+ The landlord's, 'gainst the wall and next the door;
+ Another opposite the last was set,
+ And this, to guests, at certain times was let;
+ And 'tween the two, but near the parents' best,
+ A cradle for the child to rest its head,
+ From which a pleasant accident arrived,
+ That our gallant's young friend of rest deprived.
+
+ WHEN midnight came, and this gay spark supposed
+ The host and hostess' eyes in sleep were closed,
+ Convinced the time appointed was at hand,
+ To put in execution what was planned,
+ He to the camp-bed silently repaired,
+ And found the belle by Morpheus not insnared;
+ Coletta taught a play that mortals find
+ Fatigues the body more than plagues the mind:
+ A truce succeeded, but 'twas quickly o'er:
+ Those rest not long who pilfer Cupid's store.
+
+ AGAIN, when to the room the hostess came,
+ And found the cradle rested not the same,
+ Good heav'ns! cried she, it joins my husband's head:
+ And, but for that, I truly had been led
+ To lay myself unthinkingly beside
+ The strangers whom with lodging we provide;
+ But, God be praised, this cradle shows the place
+ Where my good husband's pillow I must trace.
+ This said, she with the friend was quickly laid,
+ Without suspecting what mistake she'd made.
+
+ BETWEEN the lovers all was blithe and gay,
+ When suddenly the friend, though far from day,
+ Was forced to rise ('twas plain a pressing case,)
+ And move the infant's cradle from its place,
+ To ope the door, and lest he noise might make,
+ Or any way by chance the child should wake,
+ He set it carefully beside his bed,
+ And (softly treading) to the garden sped.
+
+ ON his return he passed the cradle by;
+ To place it as before he would not try,
+ But went to sleep; when presently a sound,
+ From something that had tumbled, rang around,
+ Awoke his wife, who ran below,
+ That what had happened she might clearly know.
+ No fool in such adventures was our Wight:
+ The opportunity he would not slight,
+ But played the husband well: no, no, I'm wrong;
+ He played it ill:--too oft, too much, too long;
+ For whosoe'er would wish to do it well,
+ Should softly go:--the gentle most excel.
+
+ IN truth, the wife was quite surprised to find
+ Her spouse so much to frolicking inclined;
+ Said she, what ails the man, he's grown so gay?
+ A lad of twenty's not more fond of play.
+ Well! let's enjoy the moments while we can;
+ God's will be done, since life is but a span!
+
+ THE words were scarcely said, when our gallant
+ Renewed his fun, and nothing seemed to want;
+ Indeed, the hostess still her charms possessed,
+ And, on occasion, well might be caressed.
+
+ MEANWHILE Coletta, dreading a surprise,
+ Prevailed upon her paramour to rise;
+ 'Twas nearly break of day when he withdrew,
+ But, groping to his place the way anew,
+ Pinucio, by the cradle too, was led
+ To miss his friend's and take the landlord's bed.
+ No sooner in than with an under voice,
+ (Intriguers oft too eagerly rejoice,)
+ Said he, my friend, I wish I could relate
+ The pleasure I've received; my bliss is great;
+ To you, I'm sorry, Fortune proves so cold;
+ Like happiness I'd fain in you behold;
+ Coletta is a morsel for a king;
+ Inestimable girl!--to me she'll cling.
+ I've many seen, but such a charming fair,
+ There's not another like her any where.
+
+ WITH softest skin, delightful form and mien;
+ Her ev'ry act resembles BEAUTY's queen;
+ In short, before we'd ended with our fun,
+ Six posts (without a fiction) we had run.
+ The host was struck with what the spark averred,
+ And muttered something indistinctly heard.
+
+ THE hostess whispered HIM she thought her spouse:--
+ Again, my dear, such sparks let's never house;
+ Pray don't you hear how they together chat?--
+ Just then the husband raised himself and sat;
+ Is this your plan? said he with mighty rage;
+ Was it for THIS you would my house engage?
+ You understand me, but I'll seek redress;
+ Think you so very cheap to have success?
+ What, would you ruin families at will,
+ And with our daughters take at ease your fill?
+ Away, I say! my house this moment quit;
+ And as for You, abominable chit,
+ I'll have your life: this hour you breathe your last;
+ Such creatures only can with beasts be classed.
+
+ PINUCIO heard the lecture with dismay,
+ At once was mute, and grew as cold as clay;
+ A moment's silence through the room prevailed;
+ Coletta trembled, and her lot bewailed.
+ The hostess now, on ev'ry side perceived
+ Her peril great, and for the error grieved.
+ The friend, howe'er, the cradle called to mind,
+ Which caused the many ills we've seen combined,
+ And instantly he cried:--Pinucio! strange
+ You thus allow yourself about to range;
+ Did I not tell you when the wine you took,
+ 'Twould make many sad misfortunes hook?
+ Whene'er you freely drink, 'tis known fall well,
+ Your sleep's disturbed, you walk, and nonsense tell.
+ Come, come to bed: the morning soon will peep;
+ Pinucio took the hint, pretended sleep,
+ And carried on so artfully the wile,
+ The husband no suspicion had of guile.
+ The stratagem our hostess likewise tried,
+ And to her daughter's bed in silence hied,
+ Where she conceived her fortress was so strong,
+ She presently began to use her tongue,
+ And cried aloud:--Impossible the fact;
+ Such things he could not with Coletta act;
+ I've with her been in bed throughout the night,
+ And she, no more than I, has swerved from right;
+ 'Twere mighty pretty, truly, here to come;
+ At this the host a little while was dumb;
+ But in a lower tone at length replied
+ I nought with your account I'm satisfied.
+
+ THE party rose; the titter circled round;
+ And each sufficient reason for it found;
+ The whole was secret, and whoe'er had gained,
+ With care upon the subject mute remained.
+
+
+
+
+
+*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TALES AND NOVELS OF FONTAINE, V12 ***
+
+*********** This file should be named 5286.txt or 5286.zip ***********
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