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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/4508.txt b/4508.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..eb1c580 --- /dev/null +++ b/4508.txt @@ -0,0 +1,15251 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of South Wind, by Norman Douglas + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org/license + + +Title: South Wind + +Author: Norman Douglas + +Posting Date: August 19, 2012 [EBook #4508] +Release Date: October, 2003 +[This file was first posted on January 27, 2002] +[Last updated: March 2, 2016] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SOUTH WIND *** + + + + +Produced by Charles Aldarondo Aldarondo@yahoo.com and Colin +Choat CChoat@sanderson.net.au + + + + + + + +SOUTH WIND + +BY NORMAN DOUGLAS + +AUTHOR OF 'OLD CALABRIA' + +LONDON: MARTIN SECKER + +First Published March 1917 + + + + + + +CHAPTER I + + + + + +The bishop was feeling rather sea-sick. Confoundedly sea-sick, in fact. + +This annoyed him. For he disapproved of sickness in every shape or +form. His own state of body was far from satisfactory at that moment; +Africa--he was Bishop of Bampopo in the Equatorial Regions--had played +the devil with his lower gastric department and made him almost an +invalid; a circumstance of which he was nowise proud, seeing that +ill-health led to inefficiency in all walks of life. There was nothing +he despised more than inefficiency. Well or ill, he always insisted on +getting through his tasks in a businesslike fashion. That was the way +to live, he used to say. Get through with it. Be perfect of your kind, +whatever that kind may be. Hence his sneaking fondness for the +natives--they were such fine, healthy animals. + +Fine, healthy animals; perfect of their kind! Africa liked them to "get +through with it" according to their own lights. But there was evidently +a little touch of spitefulness and malice about Africa; something +almost human. For when white people try to get through with it after +their particular fashion, she makes hay of their livers or something. +That is what had happened to Thomas Heard, D.D., Bishop of Bampopo. He +had been so perfect of his kind, such an exemplary pastor, that there +was small chance of a return to the scenes of his episcopal labours. +Anybody could have told him what would happen. He ought to have allowed +for a little human weakness, on the part of the Black Continent. It +could not be helped. For the rest, he was half inclined to give up the +Church and take to some educational work on his return to England. +Perhaps that was why he at present preferred to be known as "Mr. +Heard." It put people at their ease, and him too. + +Whence now this novel and unpleasant sensation in the upper gastric +region? Most annoying! He had dined discreetly at his hotel the evening +before; had breakfasted with moderation. And had he not voyaged in many +parts of the world, in China Seas and round the Cape? Was he not even +then on his return journey from Zanzibar? No doubt. But the big liner +which deposited him yesterday at the thronged port was a different +concern from this wretched tub, reeking with indescribable odours as it +rolled in the oily swell of the past storm through which the MOZAMBIQUE +had ridden without a tremor. The benches, too, were frightfully +uncomfortable, and sticky with sirocco moisture under the breathless +awning. Above all, there was the unavoidable spectacle of the suffering +passengers, natives of the country; it infected him with misery. In +attitudes worthy of Michelangelo they sprawled about the deck, groaning +with anguish; huddled up in corners with a lemon-prophylactic against +sea-sickness, apparently-pressed to faces which, by some subtle process +of colour-adaptation, had acquired the complexion of the fruit; +tottering to the taffrail.... + +There was a peasant woman dressed in black, holding an infant to her +breast. Both child and parent suffered to a distressing degree. By some +kindly dispensation of Providence they contrived to be ill in turns, +and the situation might have verged on the comical but for the fact +that blank despair was written on the face of the mother. She evidently +thought her last day had come, and still, in the convulsions of her +pain, tried to soothe the child. An ungainly creature, with a big scar +across one cheek. She suffered dumbly, like some poor animal. The +bishop's heart went out to her. + +He took out his watch. Two more hours of discomfort to be gone through! +Then he looked over the water. The goal was far distant. + +Viewed from the clammy deck on this bright morning, the island of +Nepenthe resembled a cloud. It was a silvery speck upon that limitless +expanse of blue sea and sky. A south wind breathed over the +Mediterranean waters, drawing up their moisture which lay couched in +thick mists abut its flanks and uplands. The comely outlines were +barely suggested through a veil of fog. An air of irreality hung about +the place. Could this be an island? A veritable island of rocks and +vineyards and houses--this pallid apparition? It looked like some snowy +sea-bird resting upon the waves; a sea-bird or a cloud; one of those +lonely clouds that stray from their fellows and drift about in wayward +fashion at the bidding of every breeze. + +All the better-class natives had disappeared below save an unusually +fat young priest with a face like a full moon, who pretended to be +immersed in his breviary but was looking out of the corner of his eye +all the time at a pretty peasant girl reclining uncomfortably in a +corner. He rose and arranged the cushions to her liking. In doing so he +must have made some funny remark in her ear, for she smiled wanly as +she said: + +"Grazie, Don Francesco." + +"Means thank you, I suppose," thought the Bishop. "But why is he a +don?" + +Of the other alien travellers, those charming but rather metallic +American ladies had retired to the cabin; so had the English family; so +had everybody, in fact. On deck there remained of the foreign +contingent nobody but himself and Mr. Muhlen, a flashy over-dressed +personage who seemed to relish the state of affairs. He paced up and +down, cool as a cucumber, trying to walk like a sailor, and blandly +indifferent to the agonized fellow-creatures whom the movements of the +vessel caused him to touch, every now and then, with the point of his +patent-leather boots. Patent-leather boots. That alone classes him, +thought Mr. Heard. Once he paused and remarked, in his horrible +pronunciation of English: + +"That woman over there with the child! I wonder what I would do in her +place? Throw it into the water, I fancy. It's often the only way of +getting rid of a nuisance." + +"Rather a violent measure," replied the Bishop politely. + +"You're not feeling very well, sir?" he continued, with a fine +assumption of affability. "I am so sorry. As for me, I like a little +movement of the boat. You know our proverb? Weeds don't spoil. I'm +alluding to myself, of course!" + +Weeds don't spoil.... + +Yes, he was a weed. Mr. Heard had not taken kindly to him; he hoped +they would not see too much of each other on Nepenthe, which he +understood to be rather a small place. A few words of civility over the +table d'hote had led to an exchange of cards--a continental custom which +Mr. Heard always resented. It could not easily be avoided in the +present case. They had talked of Nepenthe, or rather Mr. Muhlen had +talked; the bishop, as usual, preferring to listen and to learn. Like +himself, Mr. Muhlen had never before set foot on the place. To be sure, +he had visited other Mediterranean islands; he knew Sicily fairly well +and had once spent a pleasant fortnight on Capri. But Nepenthe was +different. The proximity to Africa, you know; the volcanic soil. Oh +yes! It was obviously quite another sort of island. Business? No! He +was not bound on any errand of business; not on any errand at all. Just +a little pleasure trip. One owes something to one's self: N'EST-CE-PAS? +And this early summer was certainly the best time for travelling. One +could count on good weather; one could sleep in the afternoon, if the +heat were excessive. He had telegraphed for a couple of rooms in what +was described as the best hotel--he hoped the visitors staying there +would be to his liking. Unfortunately--so he gathered--the local society +was a little mixed, a little--how shall we say?--ultra-cosmopolitan. The +geographical situation of the island, lying near the converging point +of many trade-routes, might account for this. And then its beauty and +historical associations: they attracted strange tourists from every +part of the world. Queer types! Types to be avoided, perhaps. But what +did it matter, after all? It was one of the advantages of being a man, +a civilized man, that you could amuse yourself among any class of +society. As for himself, he liked the common people, the peasants and +fishermen; he felt at home among them; they were so genuine, so +refreshingly different. + +To suchlike ingratiating and rather obvious remarks the bishop had +listened, over the dinner table, with urbane acquiescence and growing +distrust. Peasants and fisher folks! This fellow did not look as if he +cared for such company. He was probably a fraud. + +They had met again in the evening, and taken a short stroll along the +quay where a noisy band was discoursing operatic airs. The performance +elicited from Mr. Muhlen some caustic comments on Latin music as +contrasted with that of Russia and other countries. He evidently knew +the subject. Mr. Heard, to whom music was Greek, soon found himself out +of his depths. Later on, in the smoking-room, they had indulged in a +game of cards--the bishop being of that broadminded variety which has +not the slightest objection to a gentlemanly gamble. Once more his +companion had revealed himself as an accomplished amateur. + +No; it was something else that annoyed him about the man--certain almost +contemptuous remarks he had dropped in the course of the evening on the +subject of the female sex; not any particular member of it, but the sex +in general. Mr. Heard was sensitive on that point. He was not +disheartened by experience. He had never allowed his judgment to be +warped by those degrading aspects of womanhood which he had encountered +during his work among the London poor, and more recently in Africa, +where women are treated as the veriest beasts. He kept his ideals +bright. He would tolerate no flippant allusions to the sex. Muhlen's +talk had left a bad taste in his mouth. + +And here he was, prancing up and down, sublimely pleased with himself. +Mr. Heard watched his perambulations with mixed feelings--moral +disapproval combining with a small grain of envy at the fellow's +conspicuous immunity from the prevailing sea-sickness. + +A weed; unquestionably a weed. + +Meanwhile, the mainland slowly receded. Morning wore on, and under the +fierce attraction of the sun the fogs were drawn upwards. Nepenthe +became tangible--an authentic island. It gleamed with golden rocks and +emerald patches of culture. A cluster of white houses, some town or +village, lay perched on the middle heights where a playful sunbeam had +struck a pathway through the vapours. The curtain was lifted. Half +lifted; for the volcanic peaks and ravines overhead were still shrouded +in pearly mystery. + +The fat priest looked up from his breviary and smiled in friendly +fashion. + +"I heard you speak English to that person," he began, with hardly a +trace of foreign accent. "You will pardon me. I see you are unwell. May +I get you a lemon? Or perhaps a glass of cognac?" + +"I am feeling better, thank you. It must have been the sight of those +poor people that upset me. They seem to suffer horribly. I suppose I +have got used to it." + +"They do suffer. And they get used to it too. I often wonder whether +they are as susceptible to pain and discomfort as the rich with their +finer nervous structure. Who can say? Animals also have their +sufferings, but they are not encouraged to tell us about them. Perhaps +that is why God made them dumb. Zola, in one of his novels, speaks of a +sea-sick donkey." + +"Dear me!" said Mr. Heard. It was an old-fashioned trick he had got +from his mother. "Dear me!" + +He wondered what this youthful ecclesiastic was doing with Zola. In +fact, he was slightly shocked. But he never allowed such a state of +affairs to be noticed. + +"You like Zola?" he queried. + +"Not much. He is rather a dirty dog, and his technique is so +ridiculously transparent. But one can't help respecting the man. If I +were to read this class of literature for my own amusement I would +prefer, I think, Catulle Mendes. But I don't. I read it, you +understand, in order to be able to penetrate into the minds of my +penitents, many of whom refuse to deprive themselves of such books. +Women are so influenced by what they read! Personally, I am not very +fond of improper writers. And yet they sometimes make one laugh in +spite of one's self, don't they? I perceive you are feeling better." + +Mr. Heard could not help saying: + +"You express yourself very well in English." + +"Oh, passably! I have preached to large congregations of Catholics in +the United States. In England, too. My mother was English. The Vatican +has been pleased to reward the poor labours of my tongue by the title +of Monsignor." + +"My congratulations. You are rather young for a Monsignor, are you not? +We are apt to associate that distinction with snuff-boxes and gout +and--" + +"Thirty-nine. It is a good age. One begins to appreciate things at +their true value. Your collar! Might I enquire--" + +"Ah, my collar; the last vestige.... Yes, I am a bishop. Bishop of +Bampopo in Central Africa." + +"You are rather young, surely, for a bishop?" + +Mr. Heard smiled. + +"The youngest on the list, I believe. There were not many applicants +for the place; the distance from England, the hard work, and the +climate, you know--" + +"A bishop. Indeed!" + +He waxed thoughtful. Probably he imagined that his companion was +telling him some traveller's tale. + +"Yes," continued Mr. Heard. "I am what we call a 'Returned Empty.' It +is a phrase we apply in England to Colonial bishops who come back from +their dioceses." + +"Returned Empty! That sounds like beer." + +The priest was looking perplexed, as though uncertain of the other's +state of mind. Southern politeness, or curiosity, overcame his fears. +Perhaps this foreigner was fond of joking. Well, he would humour him. + +"You will see our bishop to-morrow," he pursued blandly. "He comes over +for the feast of the patron saint; you are lucky in witnessing it. The +whole island is decorated. There will be music and fireworks and a +grand procession. Our bishop is a dear old man, though not exactly what +you would call a liberal," he added, with a laugh. "That is as it +should be, is it not? We like our elders to be conservative. They +counteract the often violent modernism of the youngsters. Is this your +first visit to Nepenthe?" + +"It is. I have heard much about the beauty of the place." + +"You will like it. The people are intelligent. There is good food and +wine. Our lobsters are celebrated. You will find compatriots on the +island, some ladies among them; the Duchess of San Martino, for +instance, who happens to be an American; some delightful ladies! And +the country girls, too, are worthy of a benevolent glance--" + +"That procession is sure to interest me. What is the name of your +patron?" + +"Saint Dodekanus. He has a wonderful history. There is an Englishman on +Nepenthe, Mr. Earnest Eames, a student, who will tell you all about it. +He knows more about the saint than I do; one would think he dined with +him every evening. But he is a great hermit--Mr. Eames, I mean. And it +is so good of our old bishop to come over," he pursued with a shade of +emphasis. "His work keeps him mostly on the mainland. He has a large +see--nearly thirty square miles. How large, by the way, is your +diocese?" + +"I cannot give you the exact figures," Mr. Heard replied. "It has often +taken me three weeks to travel from one end to the other. It is +probably not much smaller than the kingdom of Italy." + +"The kingdom of Italy. Indeed!" + +That settled it. The conversation died abruptly; the friendly priest +relapsed into silence. He looked hurt and disappointed. This was more +than a joke. He had done his best to be civil to a suffering foreigner, +and this was his reward--to be fooled with the grossest of fables. Maybe +he remembered other occasions when Englishmen had developed a queer +sense of humour which he utterly failed to appreciate. A liar. Or +possibly a lunatic; one of those harmless enthusiasts who go about the +world imagining themselves to be the Pope or the Archangel Gabriel. +However that might be, he said not another word, but took to reading +his breviary in good earnest, for the first time. + +The boat anchored. Natives poured out in a stream. Mr. Muhlen drove up +alone, presumably to his sumptuous hotel. The bishop, having gathered +his luggage together, followed in another carriage. He enjoyed the +drive along that winding upward track; he admired the festal +decorations of the houses, the gardens and vineyards, the many-tinted +rock scenery overhead, the smiling sunburnt peasantry. There was an air +of contentment and well-being about the place; something joyful, +opulent, almost dramatic. + +"I like it," he concluded. + +And he wondered how long it would be before he met his cousin, Mrs. +Meadows, on whose account he had undertaken to break the journey to +England. + +Don Francesco, the smiling priest, soon outstripped both of them, in +spite of a ten minutes' conversation on the quay with the pretty +peasant girl of the steamer. He had engaged the fastest driver on the +island, and was now tearing frantically up the road, determined to be +the first to apprise the Duchess of the lunatic's arrival. + + + + + + +CHAPTER II + + + + + +The Duchess of San Martino, a kind-hearted and imposing lady of mature +age who, under favourable atmospheric conditions (in winter-time, for +instance, when the powder was not so likely to run down her face), +might have passed, so far as profile was concerned, for a faded French +beauty of bygone centuries--the Duchess was no exception to the rule. + +It was an old rule. Nobody knew when it first came into vogue. Mr. +Eames, bibliographer of Nepenthe, had traced it down to the second +Phoenician period, but saw no reason why the Phoenicians, more than +anybody else, should have established the precedent. On the contrary, +he was inclined to think that it dated from yet earlier days; days when +the Troglodytes, Manigones, Septocardes, Merdones, Anthropophagoi and +other hairy aboriginals used to paddle across, in crazy canoes, to +barter the produce of their savage African glens-serpent-skins, and +gums, and gazelle horns, and ostrich eggs--for those super-excellent +lobsters and peasant girls for which Nepenthe had been renowned from +time immemorial. He based this scholarly conjecture on the fact that a +gazelle horn, identified as belonging to a now extinct Tripolitan +species, was actually discovered on the island, while an adolescent +female skull of the hypo-dolichocephalous (Nepenthean) type had come to +light in some excavations at Benghazi. + +It was a pleasant rule. It ran to the effect that in the course of the +forenoon all the inhabitants of Nepenthe, of whatever age, sex, or +condition, should endeavour to find themselves in the market-place or +piazza--a charming square, surrounded on three sides by the principal +buildings of the town and open, on the fourth, to a lovely prospect +over land and sea. They were to meet on this spot; here to exchange +gossip, make appointments for the evening, and watch the arrival of +new-comers to their island. An admirable rule! For it effectively +prevented everybody from doing any kind of work in the morning; and +after luncheon, of course, you went to sleep. It was delightful to be +obliged, by iron convention, to stroll about in the bright sunshine, +greeting your friends, imbibing iced drinks, and letting your eye stray +down to the lower level of the island with its farmhouses embowered in +vineyards; or across the glittering water towards the distant coastline +and its volcano; or upwards, into those pinnacles of the higher region +against whose craggy ramparts, nearly always, a fleet of snowy +sirocco-clouds was anchored. For Nepenthe was famous not only for its +girls and lobsters, but also for its south wind. + +As usual at this hour the market-place was crowded with folks. It was a +gay throng. Priests and curly-haired children, farmers, fishermen, +citizens, a municipal policeman or two, brightly dressed women of all +ages, foreigners in abundance--they moved up and down, talking, +laughing, gesticulating. Nobody had anything particular to do; such was +the rule. + +The Russian sect was well represented. They were religious enthusiasts, +ever increasing in numbers and led by their Master, the divinely +inspired Bazhakuloff, who was then living in almost complete seclusion +on the island. They called themselves the "Little White Cows," to mark +their innocence of worldly affairs, and their scarlet blouses, fair +hair, and wondering blue eyes were quite a feature of the place. +Overhead, fluttering flags and wreaths of flowers, and bunting, and +brightly tinted paper festoons--an orgy of colour, in honour of the +saint's festival on the morrow. + +The Duchess, attired in black, with a black and white sunshade, and a +string of preposterous amethysts nestling in the imitation Val of her +bosom, was leaning on the arm of an absurdly good-looking youth whom +she addressed as Denis. Everyone called him Denis or Mr. Denis. People +used his surname as little as possible. It was Phipps. + +With a smile for everyone, she moved more deliberately than the rest, +and used her fan rather more frequently. She knew that the sirocco was +making stealthy inroads upon her carefully powdered cheeks; she wanted +to look her best on the arrival of Don Francesco, who was to bring some +important message from the clerical authorities of the mainland anent +her forthcoming reception into the Roman Catholic Church. He was her +friend. Soon he would be her confessor. + +Wordly-wise, indolent, good-natured and, like most Southerners, a +thorough-going pagan, Don Francesco was deservedly popular as +ecclesiastic. Women adored him; he adored women. He passed for an +unrivalled preacher; his golden eloquence made converts everywhere, +greatly to the annoyance of the parroco, the parish priest, who was +doubtless sounder on the Trinity but a shocking bad orator and +altogether deficient in humanity, and who nearly had a fit, they said, +when the other was created Monsignor. Don Francesco was a fisher of +men, and of women. He fished AD MAIOREM DEI GLORIAM, and for the fun of +the thing. It was his way of taking exercise, he once confessed to his +friend Keith; he was too fat to run about like other people--he could +only talk. He fished among natives, and among foreigners. + +Foreigners were hard to catch, on Nepenthe. They came and went in such +breathless succession. Of the permanent residents only the Duchess, +always of High Church leanings, had of late yielded to his +blandishments. She was fairly hooked. Madame Steynlin, a lady of Dutch +extraction whose hats were proverbial, was uncompromisingly Lutheran. +The men were past redemption, all save the Commissioner who, however, +was under bad influences and an incurable wobbler, anyhow. Eames, the +scholar, cared for nothing but his books. Keith, a rich eccentric who +owned one of the finest villas and gardens on the place, only came to +the island for a few weeks every year. He knew too much, and had +travelled too far, to be anything but a hopeless unbeliever; besides, +he was a particular friend of his, with whom he agreed, in his heart of +hearts, on every subject. The frequenters of the Club were mostly +drunkards, derelicts, crooks, or faddist--not worth catching. + +Carriages began to arrive on the scene. That of Don Francesco drove up +first of all. He stepped out and sailed across the piazza like a +schooner before the wind. But his discourse, usually ample and florid +as befitted both his person and his calling, was couched on this +occasion in Tacitean brevity. + +"We have landed a queer fish, Duchess," he remarked. "He calls himself +Bishop of Bim-Bam-Bum, and resembles a broken-down matrimonial agent. +So lean! So yellow! His face all furrowed! He has lived very viciously, +that man. Perhaps he is mad. In every case, look to your purse, Mr. +Denis. He'll be here in a minute." + +"That's quite right," said the young man. "The Bishop of Bampopo. It's +in the NEW YORK HERALD. Sailing by the MOZAMBIQUE. But they didn't say +he was coming to the island. I wonder what he wants here?" + +Don Francesco was aghast. + +"Indeed?" he asked. "A bishop, and so yellow! He must have thought me +very rude," he added. + +"You couldn't be rude if you tried," said the Duchess, giving him a +playful slap with her fan. + +She was burning with ardour to be the first to introduce such a lion to +the local society. But fearful of making a FAUX PAS, she said: + +"You'll go and speak to him, Denis. Find out if it's the right one--the +one you read about in the paper, I mean. Then come and tell me." + +"Good Lord, Duchess, don't ask me to do that! I couldn't tackle a +bishop. Not an African. Not unless he has a proper apron on." + +"Be a man, Denis. He won't bite a pretty boy like you." + +"What nice things the lady is saying to you," observed Don Francesco. + +"She always does," he laughed, "when she wants me to do something for +her. I haven't been on this island long, but I have already found out +the Duchess! You do it, Don Francesco. He is sure to be the right one. +They get yellow, out there. Sometimes green." + +Mr. Heard was intercepted on his way to the hotel by the genial priest, +and formally presented to the Duchess. She was more than condescending +to this stern and rather tired-looking man; she was gracious. She made +all kinds of polite enquiries, and indicated the various sites and +persons of interest; while Don Francesco, he observed, had +unaccountably recovered from his sudden attack of bad humour on the +steamer. + +"And that is where I live," she said, pointing to a large and severe +structure whose walls had plainly not been whitewashed for many long +years. "It's an old disused convent, built by the Good Duke Alfred. +Wasn't it, Denis?" + +"I really couldn't say, Duchess. I never heard of the gentleman." + +"That Good Duke was an unmitigated ruffian," observed Don Francesco. + +"Oh, don't say that! Think of all the good he did for the island. Think +of that frieze in the church! I have acres and acres of rooms to walk +about in," she continued, addressing the bishop. "All by myself! I'm +quite a hermit, you know. You will perhaps be able to have a cup of tea +with me to-day?" + +"Not exactly a hermit," Denis interposed. + +"To take tea with the Duchess is an experience, a revelation," said Don +Francesco in judicial tones. "I have enjoyed that meal in various parts +of the world, but nobody can manage it like she can. She has the true +gift. You will make tea for us in Paradise, dear lady. As to luncheon, +let me tell you in confidence, Mr. Heard, that my friend Keith, whom +you will meet sooner or later, has a most remarkable chef. What that +man of Keith's cannot cook is not worth eating." + +"How delightful!" replied the bishop, slightly embarrassed. "And +where," he added, laughing--"where does one dine?" + +"I do not dine. Madame Steynlin used to give nice evening parties," he +continued reflectively, and with a shade of sadness in his voice. +"Excellent little dinners! But she is so taken up with Russians just +now; they quite monopolise her house. Down there; do you see, Mr. +Heard? That white villa by the sea, at the end of the promontory? She +is so romantic. That is why she bought a house which nobody else would +have bought at any price. That little place, all by itself--it +fascinated her. Bitterly she regrets her choice. She has discovered the +drawbacks of a promontory. My dear Duchess, never live on a promontory! +It has fearful inconveniences; you are overlooked by everybody. All the +islands know what you do, and who visits you, and when, and why.... +Yes, I remember those dinners with regret. Nowadays I must content +myself with a miserable supper at home. The doctor has forbidden +dinners. He says I am getting too fat." + +Denis remarked: + +"Your fat is your fortune, Don Francesco." + +"My fortune, then, is a heavy load to bear. Mr. Keith tells me I have +seven double chins, three behind and four in front. He says he has +counted them carefully. He declares that an eighth is in course of +formation. It is too much for a person of my austere temperament." + +"You need never believe a word Keith says," said the Duchess. "He +upsets me with his long words and his--his awful views. He really does." + +"I tell him he is the Antichrist," observed Don Francesco, gravely +shaking his head. "But we shall see! We shall catch him yet." + +The Duchess had no idea what the Antichrist was, but she felt sure it +was something not quite nice. + +"If I thought he was anything like that, I would never ask him to my +house again. The Antichrist! Ah, talk of angels--" + +The person in question suddenly appeared, superintending half a dozen +young gardeners who carried various consignments of plants wrapped up +in straw which had arrived, presumably, by the steamer. + +Mr. Keith was older than he looked--incredibly old, in fact, though +nobody could bring himself to believe it; he was well preserved by +means of a complicated system of life, the details of which, he used to +declare, were not fit for publication. That was only his way of +talking. He exaggerated so dreadfully. His face was clean-shaven, rosy, +and of cherubic fulness; his eyes beamed owlishly through spectacles +which nobody had ever seen him take off. But for those spectacles he +might have passed for a well-groomed baby in a soap-advertisement. He +was supposed to sleep in them. + +It looked as if Mr. Keith had taken an instantaneous liking to the +bishop. + +"Bampopo? Why, of course. I've been there. Years and years ago. Long +before your time, I'm afraid. How is the place getting on? Better +roads, no doubt. And better food, I hope? I was much interested in that +little lake--you know? It seemed to have no outlet. We must talk it +over. And I like those Bulanga people--fine fellows! You liked them too? +I'm glad to hear it. Such a lot of nonsense was talked about their +depravity! If you have nothing better to do, come and lunch to-morrow, +can you? Villa Khismet. Anybody will show you the way. You, Denis," he +added, "you disappoint me. You look like a boy who is fond of flowers. +And yet you have never been to see my cannas, which are the finest in +the kingdom, to say nothing of myself, who am also something of a +flower. A carnivorous orchid, I fancy." + +"A virgin lily," suggested Don Francesco. + +"I wish I could manage to come," replied Mr. Heard. "But I must look +for a cousin of mine to-morrow; Mrs. Meadows. Perhaps you know her?" + +The priest said: + +"We all know Mrs. Meadows. And we all like her. Unfortunately she lives +far, far away; right up there," and he pointed vaguely towards the +sirocco clouds. "In the Old Town, I mean. She dwells like a hermit, all +alone. You can drive up there in a carriage, of course. It is a pity +all these nice people live so far away. There is Count Caloveglia, for +instance, whom I would like to see every day of my life. He talks +better English than I do, the old humbug! He, too, is a hermit. But he +will be down here to-morrow. He never misses the theatricals." + +Everybody seems to be a hermit hereabouts, thought Mr. Heard. And yet +this place is seething with people! + +Aloud he said: + +"So my cousin lives up in the fog. And does it always hang about like +this?" + +"Oh dear no!" replied the Duchess. "It goes away sometimes, in the +afternoon. The sirocco, this year, has been most exceptional. Most +exceptional! Don't you think so, Denis?" + +"Really couldn't say, Duchess. You know I only arrived last week." + +"Most exceptional! Don Francesco will bear me out." + +"It blows," said the priest, "when the good God wishes it to blow. He +has been wishing pretty frequently of late." + +"I am writing to your cousin," the Duchess remarked, "to ask her to my +small annual gathering after the festival of Saint Dodekanus. +To-morrow, you know. Quite an informal little affair. I may count on +you, Bishop? You'll all come, won't you? You too, Mr. Keith. But no +long words, remember! Nothing about reflexes and preternatural and +things like that. And not a syllable about the Incarnation, please. It +scares me. What's the name of her villa, Denis?" + +"Mon Repos. Rather a commonplace name, I think--Mon Repos." + +"It is," said Keith. "But there is nothing commonplace about the lady. +She is what I would call a New Woman." + +"Dear me!" + +Mr. Heard was alarmed at this picture of his cousin. He did not +altogether approve of New Women. + +"She has long ago passed the stage you have in mind, Bishop. She is +newer than that. The real novelty! Looks after the baby, and thinks of +her husband in India. I believe I have many points in common with the +New Woman. I often think of people in India." + +"Such a dear little child," said the Duchess. + +"Almost as round as myself," added Don Francesco. "There goes the +Commissioner! He is fussing about with the judge, that red-haired +man--do you see, Mr. Heard?--who limps like Mephistopheles and spits +continually. They say he wants to imprison all the Russians. Poor +folks! They ought to be sent home; they don't belong here. He is +looking at us now. Ha, the animal! He has the Evil Eye. He is also +scrofulous, rachitic. And his name is Malipizzo." + +"What a funny name," remarked the Bishop. + +"Yes, and he is a funny animal. They are great friends, those two." + +"A horrible man, that judge," said the Duchess. "Only think, Mr. Heard, +an atheist." + +"A freemason," corrected Mr. Keith. + +"It's the same thing. And ugly! Nobody has a right to be quite so ugly. +I declare he's worse than the cinematographic villain--you remember, +Denis?" + +"It is a miracle he has lived so long, with that face," added Don +Francesco. "I think God created him in order that mankind should have +some idea of the meaning of the word 'grotesque.'" + +The proud title "Commissioner" caused the bishop to pay particular +attention to the other of the two individuals in question. He beheld a +stumpy and pompous-looking personage, flushed in the face, with a +moth-eaten grey beard and shifty grey eyes, clothed in a flannel shirt, +tweed knickerbockers, brown stockings, white spats and shoes. Such was +the Commissioner's invariable get-up, save that in winter he wore a cap +instead of a panama. He was smoking a briar pipe and looking blatantly +British, as if he had just spent an unwashed night in a third-class +carriage between King's Cross and Aberdeen. The magistrate, on the +other hand--the red-haired man--was jauntily dressed, with a straw hat on +one side of his repulsive head, and plenty of starch about him. + +"I never knew we had a Commissioner here," said Mr. Heard. + +Keith replied: + +"We haven't. He is Financial Commissioner for Nicaragua. An +incomparable ass is Mr. Freddy Parker." + +"Oh, he has a sensible idea now and then, when he forgets to be a +fool," observed Don Francesco. "He is President of the Club, Mr. Heard. +They will elect you honorary member. Take my advice. Avoid the whisky." + +Denis remarked, after a critical glance in the same direction: + +"I notice that the Commissioner looks redder in the face than when I +last saw him." + +"That," said Keith, "is one of Mr. Parker's characteristics." + + + + + + +CHAPTER III + + + + + +Concerning the life and martyrdom of Saint Dodekanus, patron of +Nepenthe, we possess hardly any information of a trustworthy nature. It +is with his career as with that of other saints: they become +overlaid--encrusted, as it were--with extraneous legendary material in +the course of ages, even as a downward-rolling avalanche gathers snow. +The nucleus is hard to find. What is incontestably true may be summed +up almost in one paragraph. + +He was born in A.D. 450, or thereabouts, in the city of Kallisto, in +Crete. He was an only child, a beautiful but unruly boy, the despair of +his widowed mother. At the age of thirteen he encountered, one evening, +an elderly man of thoughtful mien, who addressed him in familiar +language. On several later occasions he discoursed with the same +personage, in a grove of laurels and pines known as Alephane; but what +passed between them, and whether it was some divine apparition, or +merely a man of flesh and blood, was never discovered, for he seems to +have kept his mother in ignorance of the whole affair. From that time +onward his conduct changed. He grew pensive, mild, and charitable. He +entered, as youthful acolyte, a neighbouring Convent of Salacian monks, +and quickly distinguished himself for piety and the gift of miracles. +In the short space of three years, or thereabouts, he had healed eight +lepers, caused the clouds to rain, walked dryshod over several rivers, +and raised twenty-three persons from the dead. + +At the age of eighteen he had a second vision. This time it was a young +woman, of pleasing exterior. He discoursed with her, on several +occasions, in the grove of laurels and pines known as Alephane; but +what passed between them, and whether it was a woman of flesh and +blood, or merely an angel, was never discovered, for he seems to have +kept his brother monks in ignorance of the whole affair. From that time +onward his conduct changed. He grew restless and desirous of converting +the heathen. He set sail for Lybia, suffered shipwreck in the Greater +Syrtis, and narrowly escaped with his life. Thence he passed onward, +preaching to black nations as he moved along, and converting tribes +innumerable. For three-and-thirty years he wandered till, one evening, +he saw the moon rise on the right side of his face. + +He had entered the land of the Crotalophoboi, cannibals and +necromancers who dwelt in a region so hot, and with light so dazzling, +that their eyes grew on the soles of their feet. Here he laboured for +eighty years, redeeming them to Christianity from their magical and +bloodthirsty practices. In recompense whereof they captured him at the +patriarchal age of 132, or thereabouts, and bound him with ropes +between two flat boards of palmwood. Thus they kept the prisoner, +feeding him abundantly, until that old equinoctial feast drew near. On +the evening of that day they sawed the whole, superstitiously, into +twelve separate pieces, one for each month of the year; and devoured of +the saint what was to their liking. + +During this horrid banquet a femur or thigh-bone was accidentally cast +upon a millstone which lay by the shore, having been borrowed by the +Crotalophoboi from the neighbouring tribe of Garimanes a good many +years previously and never returned to them by reason, they declared, +of its excessive weight. There it remained till, one day, during a +potent sirocco tempest, the stone was uplifted by the force of the +waters, and miraculously wafted over the sea to Nepenthe. Forthwith a +chapel was built on the spot, to commemorate the event and preserve the +sacred relic which soon began working wonders for the good of the +island, such as warding off Saracenic invasions, procuring plentiful +vintages, and causing sterile cattle to produce offspring. + +In later years the main church was dedicated to Saint Dodekanus and the +relic moved thither and enclosed within that silver statue of the saint +which is carried abroad in procession at his annual festival, or on any +particular occasion when his help is to be invoked. And all through +succeeding ages the cult of the saint waxed in pomp and splendour. +Nobody, probably, has done more to foster pious feelings towards their +island-patron than the Good Duke Alfred who, among other things, caused +a stately frieze to be placed in the church, picturing in twelve marble +tablets the twelve chief episodes in the life of the Saint--one for each +month of the year. This frieze indeed was admired so unreservedly, so +recklessly, that the Good Duke felt it his duty to remove the +sculptor's eyes and (on second thoughts) his hands as well, in order +that no other sovereign should possess works by so consummate a master +of stonecraft. There the disciplinary measures ended. He did his best +to console the gifted artist who was fed, henceforward, on lobsters, +decorated with the order of the Golden Vine, and would doubtless have +been ennobled after death, had the Prince not predeceased the sculptor. + +Such, briefly, is the history of Saint Dodekanus, and the origin of his +cult on Nepenthe. + +Legends galore, often contradictory to this account and to one another, +have clustered round his name, as was inevitable. He is supposed to +have preached in Asia Minor; to have died as a young man, in his +convent; to have become a hermit, a cobbler, a bishop (of Nicomedia), a +eunuch, a politician. Two volumes of mediocre sermons in the Byzantine +tongue have been ascribed to him. These and other crudities may be +dismissed as apocryphal. Even his name has given rise to controversy, +although its origin from the Greek word DODEKA, signifying twelve and +alluding to the twelve morsels into which his body was superstitiously +divided, is as self-evident as well can be. Thus a worthy young canon +of the church of Nepenthe, Giacinto Mellino, who has lately written a +life of Saint Eulalia, the local patroness of sailors--her festival +occurs twelve days after that of Saint Dodekanus--takes occasion, in +this otherwise commendable pamphlet, to scoff at the old-established +derivation of the name and to propose an alternative etymology. He lays +it down that then pagan inhabitants of the island, desirous of sharing +in the benefits of Christianity which had already reached the mainland +but left untouched their lonely rock, sent a missive to the bishop +containing the two words DO DEKANUS: give us a deacon! The grammar is +at fault, he explains, because of their rudimentary knowledge of the +Latin tongue; they had only learnt, hitherto, the first person singular +and the nominative case--so he says; and then proceeds to demonstrate, +with unanswerable arguments, that Greek was the spoken language of +Nepenthe at this period. Several scholars have been swayed by his +specious logic to abandon the older and sounder interpretation. There +are yet other conjectures about the word Dodekanus, all more or less +fanciful.... + +If the Crotalophoboi had not devoured the missionary Dodekanus, we +should assuredly never have heard of Monsignor Perrelli, the learned +and genial historian of Nepenthe. It was that story, he expressly tells +us, which inflamed him, a mere visitor to the place, with a desire to +know more about the island. A people like the Nepentheans, who could +cherish in their hearts a tale of such beauty, must be worthy, he +concluded, "of the closest and most sympathetic scrutiny." Thus, one +thing leading to another, as always happens where local researches are +concerned, he soon found himself collecting other legends, traditions, +historical data, statistics of agriculture and natural productions, and +so forth. The result of these labours was embodied in the renowned +ANTIQUITIES OF NEPENTHE. + +This book, a model of its kind, is written in Latin. It seems to have +been the author's only work, and has gone through several editions; the +last one--by no means the best as regards typography--being that of 1709. +The Crotalophoboi therefore, who procured the sanctification of +Dodekanus by methods hardly commendable to decent folks, can be said to +have done some good in the world, if the creation of a literary +masterpiece like these ANTIQUITIES, for which they are indirectly +responsible, may be classed under that head. + +It is a pity we know so little of the life of this Monsignor Perrelli. +He is disappointingly reticent about himself. We learn that he was a +native of the mainland; that he came here, as a youth, afflicted with +rheumatic troubles; that these troubles were relived by an application +of those health-giving waters which he lived to describe in one of the +happiest sections of his work, and which were to become famous to the +world at large through certain classical experiments carried out under +his contemporary, the Good Duke Alfred--a potentate who, by the way, +does not seem to have behaved very prettily to our scholar. And that is +absolutely all we know about him. The most painstaking enquiries on the +part of Mr. Eames have failed to add a single item of positive +information to our knowledge of the historian of Nepenthe. We cannot +tell when, or where, he died. He seems to have ended in regarding +himself as a native of the place. The wealth of material incorporated +in the book leads to the supposition that he must have spent long years +on the island. We may further presume, from his title, that he belonged +to the church; it was the surest path of advancement for a young man of +quality in those days. + +A perfunctory glance into his pages will suffice to prove that he +lacked what is called the ecclesiastical bent of mind. Reading between +the lines, one soon discovers that his is not so much a priest as a +statesman and philosopher, a student curious in the lore of mankind and +of nature--alert, sagacious, discriminating. He tells us, for example, +that this legend of the visions and martyrdom of Saint Dodekanus, which +he was the first to disentangle from its heterogeneous accretions, was +vastly to his liking. Why? Because of its churchly flavour? Not so; but +because he detected therein "truth and symbol. It is a tale of +universal applicability; the type, as it were, of every great man's +life, endeavour, and reward." The introduction to these ANTIQUITIES, +setting forth his maxims for the writing of history, might have been +composed not three centuries ago, but yesterday--or even to-morrow; so +modern is its note. + +Hearken to these weighty words: + +"Portraiture of characters and events should take the form of one +gentleman conversing with another, in the easy tone of good society. +The author who sets out to address a crowd defeats his own object; he +eliminates the essence of good writing--frankness. You cannot be frank +with men of low condition. You must presuppose a refined and congenial +listener, a man or woman whom you would not hesitate to take by the +hand and lead into the circle of your own personal friends. If this +applies to literature of every kind, it applies to history in a +peculiar degree. + +"History deals with situations and figures not imaginary but real. It +demands therefore a combination of qualities unnecessary to the poet or +writer of romance--glacial judgment coupled with fervent sympathy. The +poet may be an inspired illiterate, the romance-writer an uninspired +hack. Under no circumstances can either of them be accused of wronging +or deceiving the public, however incongruous their efforts. They write +well or badly, and there the matter ends. The historian, who fails in +his duty, deceives the reader and wrongs the dead. A man weighted with +such responsibilities is deserving of an audience more than usually +select--an audience of his equals, men of the world. No vulgarian can be +admitted to share those confidences.... + +"The Greeks figured forth a Muse of History; they dared express their +opinions. Genesis, that ancient barrier, did not exist for them. It +stands in the way of the modern historian; it involves him in a +ceaseless conflict with his own honesty. If he values his skin, he must +accommodate himself to current dogmas and refrain from truthful +comments and conclusions. He has the choice of being a chronologer or a +ballad-monger-obsolete and unimportant occupations. Unenviable fate of +those who aspire to be teachers of mankind, that they themselves should +be studied with a kind of antiquarian interest, stimulating thought not +otherwise than as warning examples! Clio has fallen from her pedestal. +That radiant creature, in identifying her interests with those of +theocracy, has become the hand-maiden of a withered and petulant +mistress, a mercenary slut. So things will remain, till mankind has +acquired a fresh body of ethics, corresponding to modern needs. It is +useless, it is dangerous, to pour new wine into old bottles...." + +He carries out his theory. The work of Monsignor Perrelli is, above all +things, a human document--the revelation of a personality cultured and +free from prejudice. Indeed, when one considers the religious situation +of those days, he seems to be sailing perilously near the wind in some +of his theological reflections; so much so, that Mr. Eames often +wondered whether this might not account for our ignorance of his later +life and the manner of his death. He held it possible that the scholar +may have fallen into the clutches of the Inquisition, never again to +return to the surface of society. It would explain why the first +edition of the ANTIQUITIES is so extremely rare, and why the two +subsequent ones were issued, respectively, at Amsterdam and Bale. + +Incidentally, the book contains in its nine hundred pages all that +could possibly interest a contemporary student about the history and +natural products of Nepenthe. It is still a mine of antiquarian +information, though large sections of the work have inevitably become +obsolete. To bring the ANTIQUITIES up to date by means of a revised and +enlarged version enriched with footnotes, appendixes and copious +illustrations, was the ambition, the sole ambition, of Mr. Ernest +Eames, R.A.... + +It was not true to say of this gentleman that he fled from England to +Nepenthe because he forged his mother's will, because he was arrested +while picking the pockets of a lady at Tottenham Court Road Station, +because he refused to pay for the upkeep of his seven illegitimate +children, because he was involved in a flamboyant scandal of +unmentionable nature and unprecedented dimensions, because he was +detected while trying to poison the rhinoceros at the Zoo with an +arsenical bun, because he strangled his mistress, because he addressed +an almost disrespectful letter to the Primate of England beginning "My +good Owl"--or for any suchlike reason; and that he now remained on the +island only because nobody was fool enough to lend him the ten pounds +requisite for a ticket back again. + +He came there originally to save money; and he stayed there originally +because, if he had happened to die on his homeward journey, there would +not have been enough coppers in his pocket to pay for the funeral +expenses. Nowadays, having solved the problem of how to live on 85 +pounds a year, he stayed for another reason as well: to annotate +Perrelli's ANTIQUITIES. It sweetened his self-imposed exile. + +He was a dry creature, almost wizened, with bright eyes and a short +moustache; unostentatiously dressed; fastidious, reserved, genteel, +precise in manner, and living a retired life in a two-roomed cottage +somewhere among the vineyards. + +He had taken a high degree in classics, though Greek was never much to +his taste. It was "runaway stuff"; nervous and sensuous; it opened up +too many vistas, philological and social, for his positive mind to +assimilate with comfort. Those particles alone--there was something +ambiguous, something almost disreputable, in their jocund pliability, +their readiness to lend themselves to improper uses. But Latin--ah, +Latin was different! Even at his preparatory school, where he was known +as a swot of the first water, he had displayed an unhealthy infatuation +for that tongue; he loved its cold, lapidary construction; and while +other boys played football or cricket, this withered little fellow used +to lark about with a note-book, all by himself, torturing sensible +English into its refractory and colourless periods and elaborating, +without the help of a Gradus, those inept word-mosaics which are called +Latin verses. "Good fun," he used to say, "and every bit as exciting as +algebra," as though that constituted a recommendation. Often the good +form master shook his head, and enquired anxiously whether he was +feeling unwell, or had secret troubles of any kind. + +"Oh, no, sir," he would then reply, with a funny little laugh. "Thank +you, sir. But please, sir! Would you mind telling me whether PECUNIA +really comes from PECUS? Because Adams minor (another swot) says it +doesn't." + +Later on, at the University, he used the English language for the sake +of convenience--in order to make himself understood by Dons and Heads of +Colleges. His thoughts, his dreams, were in Latin. + +Such a man, arriving almost penniless on Nepenthe, might have passed a +torpid month or two, then drifted into the Club-set and gone to the +dogs altogether. Latin saved him. He took to studying those earlier +local writers who often composed in that tongue. The Jesuitical +smoothness, the saccharine felicity of authors like Giannettasio had +just begun to pall on his fancy, when the ANTIQUITIES fell into his +hands. It was like a draught of some generous southern wine, after a +course of barley-water. Here was Latin worth reading; rich, sinewy, +idiomatic, full of flavour, masculine. Flexible, yet terse. Latin after +his own heart; a cry across the centuries! + +So bewitched was Mr. Eames with the grammar and syntax of the +ANTIQUITIES that he had already gone through the book three times ere +realizing that this man, who could construct such flowing, glowing +sentences, was actually writing about something. Yes, he had something +of uncommon interest to impart. And a gentleman, by Jove! So different +from what one runs up against nowadays. He had an original way of +looking at things--a human way. Very human. Those quaint streaks of +credulity, those whimsical blasphemies, those spicy Court anecdotes +dropped, as it were, in the smoking room of a patrician club--a rare old +fellow! He would have given anything to have made his acquaintance. + +Forthwith a change came over Mr. Ernest Eames. His frozen classical +mind blossomed under the sunny stimulus of the Renaissance scholar. He +entered upon a second boyhood--a real boyhood, this time, full of +enthusiasms and adventures into flowery by-paths of learning. Monsignor +Perrelli absorbed him. He absorbed Monsignor Perrelli. Marginal +observation led to footnotes; footnotes to appendixes. He had found an +interest in life. He would annotate the ANTIQUITIES. + +In the section which deals with the life of Saint Dodekanus the Italian +had displayed more than his usual erudition and acumen. He had sifted +the records with such incredible diligence that little was left for the +pen of an annotator, save words of praise. In two small matters, +however, the Englishman, considerably to his regret, was enabled or +rather obliged to add a postscript. + +Many a time he cursed the day when his researches among the archives of +the mainland brought him into contact with the unpublished chronicle of +Father Capocchio, a Dominican friar of licorous and even licentious +disposition, a hater of Nepenthe and a personal enemy, it seemed, of +his idol Perrelli. His manuscript--the greater part of it, at all +events--was not fit to be printed; not fit to be touched by respectable +people. Mr. Eames felt it his duty to waive considerations of delicacy. +In his capacity of annotator he would have plunged headlong into the +Augean stables, had there been any likelihood of extracting therefrom +the germs of a luminous footnote. He perused the manuscript, making +notes as he went along. This wretched monk, he concluded, must have +possessed a damnably intimate knowledge of Nepenthean conditions, and a +cantankerous and crapulous turn of mind, into the bargain. He never +lost an opportunity of denigrating the island; he was determined, +absolutely determined, to see only the bad side of things, so far as +that place was concerned. + +Regarding the pious relic, for instance,--the thigh-bone of the saint, +preserved in the principal church--he wrote: + +"A certain Perrelli who calls himself historian, which is as though one +should call a mule a horse, or an ass a mule, brays loudly and +disconnectedly about the femur of the local god. We have personally +examined this priceless femur. It is not a femur, but a tibia. And it +is the tibia not of a saint, but of a young cow or calf. We may +mention, in passing, that we hold a diploma in anatomy from the +Palermitan Faculty of Medicine." + +That was Father Capocchio's way: bald to coarseness, whenever he lacked +occasion to be obscene. + +To Mr. Eames it would have mattered little, A PRIORI, whether the relic +was a femur or a tibia, a cow or man. In this case, he liked to think +it was the thigh-bone of a saint. He possessed an unusually strong dose +of that Latin PIETAS, that reverence which consists in leaving things +as they are, particularly when they have been described for the benefit +of posterity, with the most engaging candour, by a man of Perrelli's +calibre. Now an insinuation like this could not be slurred over. It was +a downright challenge! The matter must be thrashed out. For four months +he poured over books on surgery and anatomy. Then, having acquired a +knowledge of the subject--adequate, though necessarily superficial--he +applied to the ecclesiastical authorities for permission to view the +relic. It was politely refused. The saintly object, they declared, +could only be exhibited to persons professing the Roman Catholic Faith, +and armed with a special recommendation from the bishop. + +"These," he used to say, "are the troubles which lie in wait for a +conscientious annotator." + +On another point, that of a derivation of the saint's name, he was +pained to discover in the pages of Father Capocchio an alternative +suggestion, of which more anon. It caused him many sleepless nights. +But on matters pertaining to the climate of Nepenthe, its inhabitants, +products, minerals, water-supply, fisheries, trade, folk-lore, +ethnology,--on questions such as these he had gathered much fresh +information. Sheaves of stimulating footnotes had accumulated on his +desk. + +When would all this material be published? + +Mr. Eames had not the faintest idea. Meanwhile he calmly went on +collecting and collecting, and collecting. Something might turn up, one +of these days. Everybody with the slightest pretensions to scholarship +was interested in his work; many friends had made him offers of +pecuniary assistance towards the printing of a book which could not be +expected to be a source of profit to its publisher; the wealthy and +good-natured Mr. Keith, in particular, used to complain savagely and +very sincerely at not being allowed to assist to the extent of a +hundred or two. There were days on which he seemed to yield to these +arguments; days when he expanded and gave rein to his fancy, smiling in +anticipation of that noble volume--the golden Latinity of Monsignor +Perrelli enriched with twenty-five years' patient labour on the part of +himself; days when he would go so far as to discuss prospective +contracts, and bindings and photogravures, and margins, and paper. +Everything, of course, was to be of appropriate quality--not +pretentious, but distinguished. Oh, yes! A book of that kind--it must +have a cachet of its own.... + +Then, suddenly, he would observe that he was joking; only joking. + +The true Mr. Eames revealed and reasserted himself. He shrank from the +idea. He closed up like a flower in the chill of night-fall. He was not +going to put himself under obligations to anybody. He would keep his +sense of personal independence, even if it entailed the sacrifice of a +life's ambition. Owe no man anything! The words rang in his ears. They +were his father's words. Owe no man anything! They were that +gentleman's definition of a gentleman--a definition which was cordially +approved by every other gentleman who, like Mr. Eames junior, happened +to hold analogous views. + +Gentlemen being rather scarce nowadays, we cannot but feel grateful to +the Crotalophoboi for devouring Saint Dodekanus and paving the way, VIA +the ANTIQUITIES of Monsignor Perrelli, for the refined personality of +Mr. Eames--even if such was not their original intention. + + + + + + +CHAPTER IV + + + + + +Next morning, at precisely 4 a.m., there was an earthquake. + +Foreigners unaccustomed to Nepenthean conditions rushed in their +pyjamas out of doors, to escape the falling wreckage. An American lady, +staying at Mr. Muhlen's high-class hotel, jumped from her bed-room on +the third floor into the courtyard below, and narrowly escaped bruising +her ankle. + +It was a false alarm. The sudden clanging of every bell on the place, +the explosion of twelve hundred mortars and the simultaneous booming of +an enormous cannon--that far-famed gun whose wayward tricks had cost the +lives of hundreds of its loaders in the days of the Good Duke--might +have passed for an earthquake of the first magnitude, so far as noise +and concussion were concerned. The island rocked to its foundations. It +was the signal for the festival of the patron saint to begin. + +Nobody could have slept through that din. Mr. Heard, dog-tired as he +was, woke up and opened his eyes. + +"Things are happening here," he said--a remark which he found himself +repeating on several later occasions. + +He looked round the room. It was not an hotel bed-room. Then he began +to remember things, drowsily. He remembered the pleasant surprise of +the previous evening--how the Duchess had called to mind a small villa, +vacated earlier than she had expected by a lady friend for whom she had +taken it. It was furnished, spotlessly clean, with a woman, a capable +cook, in attendance. She had insisted on his living there. + +"So much nicer than a dreadful room in an hotel! You'll show the bishop +all over it, won't you, Denis?" + +Walking together, he and Denis, they had been overtaken by another +recent visitor to Nepenthe. It was Mr. Edgar Marten. Mr. Marten was a +hirsute and impecunious young Hebrew of low tastes, with a passion for +mineralogy. He had profited by some University grant to make certain +studies at Nepenthe which was renowned for its variegated rocks. There +was something striking about him, thought Mr. Heard. He said little of +consequence, but Denis listened enthusiastically to his abstruse +remarks about fractures and so forth, and watched with eagerness as he +poked his stick into the rough walls to dislodge some stone that seemed +to be of interest. + +"So you don't know the difference between augite and hornblende?" he +once enquired. "Really? Dash my eyes! How old did you say you were?" + +"Nineteen." + +"And what have you been doing, Phipps, these last nineteen years?" + +"One can't know everything at my age." + +"Granted. But I think you might have learnt that much. Come to me on +Thursday morning. I'll see what I can do for you." + +Mr. Heard rather admired this youthful scientist. The fellow knew what +he was after; he was after stones. Perfect of his kind--a condition +which always appealed to the bishop. Pleasant youngsters, both of them. +And so different from each other! + +As to Denis--he could not make up his mind about Denis. To begin with, +he exhaled that peculiar College aroma which the most heroic efforts of +a lifetime often fail to dissipate. Then, he had said something about +Florence, and Cinque-Cento, and Jacopo Bellini. The bishop, a practical +man, had not much use for Jacopo Bellini or for people who talked about +him. None the less, while making himself useful with unpacking and +arranging things, Denis dropped a remark which struck Mr. Heard. + +"The canvas of Nepenthe," he observed, "is rather overcharged." + +Rather overcharged.... + +It was true, thought the bishop, as he glanced out of his window that +evening, all alone, over the sea into which a young moon was just +sinking to rest. Overcharged! A ceaseless ebb and flow of humanity +surged before his weary eyes. That sense of irreality which had struck +him on his first view of the island was still persisting; the south +wind, no doubt, helped this illusion. He remembered the general +affluence and kindliness of the people; that, at least, had made a +definite mark upon his mind. He liked the place. Already he felt at +home here, and in better health. But when he tried to conjure up some +definite impression of town and people, the images became blurred; the +smiling priest, the Duchess, Mr. Keith--they were like figures in a +dream; they merged into memories of Africa, of his fellow-passengers +from Zanzibar; they mingled with projects relating to his own future in +England--projects relating to his cousin on Nepenthe. Mr. Heard felt +exhausted. + +He was too tired to be greatly affected by that cannonade, which was +enough to rouse the dead. Something must be happening, he mused; then, +his meditations concluded, turned on his other side. He slept well into +the morning, and found his breakfast appetisingly laid out in the +adjoining room. + +And now, he thought, for that procession. + +Bells were ringing gaily into the sunshine. From a long way off, he +discerned the brazen tones of a band, the chanting of priests and +townspeople, shrill voices of women. The pageant came in sight--winding +its way through the multitudes under the beflagged arches of greenery, +while a rain of flowers descended from windows and balconies overhead. +Clusters of children went before, in many-tinted array, according to +their various schools or confraternities. Then came the municipal band +in uniform, playing the cheeriest of tunes, and escorted by the +Nepenthe militia whose old-fashioned costume of silver and scarlet was +most effective. The authorities of the island trod on their heels--grave +gentlemen in black clothes, some of them adorned with ribbons and +decorations. The Mephistophelean judge, the freethinker, was among +them; he limped along, expectorating every ten yards or so, presumably +to mark his displeasure at being obliged, as official, to attend a +religious function. The Commissioner, too, was in the ranks. He +appeared just the same as yesterday; very informal in his +knickerbockers, and decidedly pink about the gills. + +There followed a long train of priests, clad in lace and silken +garments of every hue. They looked like a perambulating flower-garden. +Plump, jovial fellows--chanting blithely, and occasionally exchanging a +few words with one another. Don Francesco glittered in crimson +vestments; he recognized Mr. Heard, and gave him a broad smile combined +with something which might have been mistaken for a wink. The huge +silver statue of the saint came next. It was a grotesque monster, borne +aloft on a wooden platform that wobbled on the shoulders of eight lusty +perspiring carriers. As it passed, all the onlookers raised their hats; +all save the Russians, the Little White Cows who, standing aside with +wonderment written on their childlike faces, were relieved from this +necessity, since the wearing of hats had been forbidden by their +leader, their self-styled Messiah, the divinely inspired Bazhakuloff; +they were to go bareheaded summer and winter, "like the Christians of +old." Some ardent believers went so far as to kneel on the stony +ground. The Duchess, the Catholic-to-be, had assumed this reverend +posture; she was on the other side of the street, surrounded by a +number of ladies and gentlemen. Mr. Heard, reviewing the crowd, +abandoned the idea of piercing that procession and exchanging a few +words with her. He would see her in the afternoon. + +Then the bishop--the dignitary whom Don Francesco had called "not +exactly a liberal." He tallied with that description. A wicked old +face! He was blear-eyed, brown as a mummy, and so fat that his legs had +long ago ceased to be any use save as a precarious support while +standing. He rode, in gorgeous apparel, on a milk-white donkey which +was led by two pretty choristers in blue. Attached to the end of a long +pole, a green umbrella of Gargantuan proportions, adorned with red +tassels, protected his wrinkled head from the rays of the sun. One hand +clutched some religious object upon which his eyes were glued in a +hypnotic trance, the other cruised aimlessly about the horizon, in the +act of benediction. + +Mumbo-jumbo, thought Mr. Heard. + +Yet he looked without wincing at the caricature of Christianity. It was +like an act in a pantomime. He had seen funnier things in Africa. Among +the Bitongos, for instance. They would have enjoyed this procession, +the Bitongos. They were Christians; had taken to the Gospel like ducks +to the water; wore top-hats at Easter. But liars--such dreadful liars! +Just the reverse of the M'tezo. Ah, those M'tezo! Incurable heathen. He +had given them up long ago. Anyhow, they despised lying. They filed +their teeth, ate their superfluous female relations, swopped wives +every new moon, and never wore a stitch of clothes. A man who appeared +among the M'tezo in a fig-leaf would find himself in the cooking-pot +within five minutes. + +How they attached themselves to his heart, those black fellows. Such +healthy animals! This spectacle, he discovered, was rather like +Africa--the same steamy heat, the same blaring noises, dazzling light, +and glowing colours; the same spirit of unconquerable playfulness in +grave concerns. + +And the Bumbulis, the Kubangos, the Mugwambas! And the Bulanga--that +tribe whom Mr. Keith seemed to know so well! Really, the Bulanga were +the worst of the lot. Not fit to be talked about. And yet, somehow or +other, one could not help liking them.... + +"Good morning, Bishop!" said a voice at his side. It was Mr. Keith. He +looked well washed and chubby in his spotless white clothes. +Accompanying him was a friend in grey flannels whom he presently +introduced as Mr. Eames. "Hope you slept well," he went on. "And how do +you like the procession? You are doing quite the right thing in +attending. Oh, quite. That is why I am here, though I don't much fancy +these ceremonies. One ought to conform to custom. Well, what are you +thinking?" + +"I was thinking of Africa, and the pain which the natives will endure +for what they call their pleasures. I wonder how much those men are +paid for carrying that statue? They perspire pretty freely." + +"They are paid nothing. They pay, themselves, a heavy sum for the +privilege." + +"You surprise me!" + +"They have remission of sins; they can be as naughty as ever they like +for a twelvemonth afterwards. That is a consideration. I will tell you +something else about that idol. It is five hundred years old--" + +"Oh, come!" interposed Mr. Eames, in a tone of gentle remonstrance. +"The saint was cast exactly eighty-two years ago; they used to have a +wooden one before that time. Anybody can see from the workmanship--" + +"Have it your way, Eames. Eighty-two years old, I was going to say, and +not yet paid for. They want some rich foreigner to produce the money. +They are counting on van Koppen, just now; an American millionaire, you +know, who comes here every year and spends a good deal of money. But I +know old Koppen. He is no fool. By the way, Eames, what do you think of +this discovery of mine? Of course you have heard of the James-Lange +theory of the Emotions, namely, that bodily changes follow directly on +the perception of the existing fact and that our feeling of these same +changes as they occur is the Emotion. They developed the theory +independently, and got great credit for it. Well, I find--what nobody +seems to have noticed--that they were anticipated by Professor Maudsley. +I've got a note of it in my pocket. Here you are. PSYCHOLOGY OF MIND, +1876, pages 472-4 ET SEQ.; 372, 384, 386-7 ET PASSIM. What do you say?" + +"Nothing. I am not interested in psychology. You know it perfectly +well. + +"Why not? Wouldn't you get more fun out of life if you were?" + +"I have Perrelli." + +"Always your old Perrelli! That reminds me, Eames. I mean to talk to +van Koppen as soon as he arrives about getting that book of yours +published. He is good for any amount. Koppen is your man." + +There was a mischievous twinkle in his eye, as he said this. + +"Please don't," implored Mr. Eames. "You will annoy me very seriously." + +"Don't be absurd, my poor fellow." + +"You can't think how much you will annoy me! How often have I told +you--" + +"Then you must lunch with me to-day, together with the bishop. Don't +trouble about driving to the Old Town to see your cousin," he added to +Mr. Heard. "She is sure to be at the reception of the Duchess this +afternoon." + +Mr. Eames said: + +"So sorry. I must get back home. I only came out to speak to a man +about a collar--for my dog, I mean. Another day, if you don't mind. And +no millionaires, whatever you do!" + +He departed, rather awkwardly. + +"He is shy," Keith explained. "But he can tell you all about the +island. And now come home with me, Bishop. I feel as if it were time +for luncheon. It must be about half-past twelve." + +Mr. Heard took out his watch. + +"Half-past twelve to the minute," he said. + +"I thought so. A man's best clock is his stomach. We have only a few +hundred yards to go. Hot, isn't it? This infernal south wind...." + +The Villa Khismet was one of the surprises of Nepenthe. It lay somewhat +out of the way, at the end of a narrow, gloomy and tortuous lane. Who +would have dreamt of finding a house of this kind in such a situation? +Who would have expected, on passing through that mouldy wooden gateway +in the wall, to find himself in a courtyard that recalled the exquisite +proportions and traceries of the Alhambra--to be able to wander thence +under fretted arches through a maze of marble-paved Moorish chambers, +great and small, opening upon each other at irregular angles with a +deliciously impromptu effect? The palace had been built regardless of +expense. It was originally laid out, Keith explained, by one of the old +rulers of Nepenthe who, to tease his faithful subjects, simulated a +frenzied devotion for the poetry and architecture of the Saracens, +their bitterest enemies. + +Something Oriental still hung about these chambers, though the modern +furniture was not at all in keeping with the style. Mr. Keith did not +profess to be a man of taste. "I try to be comfortable," he used to +say. He succeeded in being luxurious. + +They glanced into the garden--a spacious park-like enclosure terminating +in a declivity, so as to afford a view over the sea far below. It was a +mock wilderness of trees and bright blossoms, flooded in meridian +sunlight. Some gardeners moved about, binding up the riotous vegetation +that had sprouted overnight under the moist breath of the sirocco. + +"It's too hot to think of lunching out here," said Keith. "You should +come and see this place in the evening." + +"It must be wonderful at that hour." + +"Still more wonderful in the early morning, or by moonlight. But then I +am generally alone. There are twenty-four fountains in this garden," he +added. "They might help to keep the place cool. But of course not one +of them is in use now. You have observed, have you not, that there is +no running water on this island? That old Duke built the fountains all +the same, and to every one of them he attached a cistern, to hold the +winter rains; then a pumping apparatus. Relays of slaves had to work +underground, day and night, pumping water for these twenty-four +fountains; it fell back into the cisterns, and was forced up again. The +Arabs had fountains. He meant to have them too. Particularly at night! +If anything went wrong with the machinery at that hour, there was the +devil to pay. He swore he could not sleep unless he heard the music of +the water. And his sleepless nights were bad for his subjects. They +generally hid in caves till the fountains were reported to be in +working order again. That is the way to run an island, Mr. Heard. One +must be a stylist." + +"You might re-activate one of them, at least, with the help of those +servants." + +"They have enough to do, I assure you, to re-activate me--keep me young +and in good condition. To say nothing of the flowers, which also need a +little friendly attention...." + +Mr. Heard enjoyed that luncheon. "The food, the wine, the service--they +were faultless; something altogether out of the way," he declared with +frank conviction. + +"Then you must come again," replied his host. "How long did you say you +were staying here?" + +"Ten days or so. It depends upon Mrs. Meadows and her movements. I +understand she is all alone up there, in the clouds. Her husband's +leave has been postponed for the second time. He was going to pick her +up on his way to England. She had to leave India before him, on account +of the child." + +"A pretty baby. Couldn't stand the climate, I suppose." + +"Exactly. My mother asked me to look in and cheer her up a little, and +perhaps take her back with me. And really," he added, "it's rather +awkward! I have not seen my cousin since she was a little girl. What +does she look like?" + +"Tailor-made. Looks as if she rode well and knew her own mind. Looks as +if she had been through a good deal of trouble." + +"I daresay she has. She was always impetuous, even as a child. That +first marriage was not at all a success. Some foreign scoundrel who +deserted her and vanished. I was in China at the time, but my mother +wrote me about it." + +"A first marriage? She never told me about that." + +"This second one was a love match. They ran away together. They must +have had a hard time out there at first, living as they did. No doubt +she has learnt to know her own mind; one has to cope with emergencies +in a life like that. He has done well, I hear. A charming fellow, from +all accounts, though I question whether they are properly married even +now." + +"Perhaps they can't be," replied Mr. Keith, "in view of the earlier +affair. But how will they educate that boy, in India? It can't be done. +India is no better than Bampopo, for such purposes. Did you do much +educational work in Africa? I hope you were gentle with my friends the +Bulaga?" + +"We baptized two or three hundred of them one day. But they behaved +shockingly the very next week--quite disgracefully! They are hopeless, +those friends of yours, though one cannot help liking them somehow. I +got through good deal of other work of that kind," he added. + +"I see you are a man of action. Sometimes I wish I were. A little money +has made me lazy, I'm afraid. But I do some thinking, and a fair lot of +reading. I travel, I observe, I compare. Among other things I observe +that our English system of education is all wrong. We ought to return +to that old Camp-and-Court ideal." + +"All wrong?" queried the bishop. + +"Take a case like that young fellow Denis. What is a child of his age +doing at a University? No. If I had a son--but I am boring you." + +"I have not been bored since I was twenty." + +"I wish I could say the same of myself. I grow more intolerant of fools +as the years roll on. If I had a son, I was saying, I would take him +from school at the age of fourteen, not a moment later, and put him for +two years in a commercial house. Wake him up; make an English citizen +of him. Teach him how to deal with men as men, to write a +straightforward business letter, manage his own money and gain some +respect for those industrial movements which control the world. Next, +two years in some wilder part of the world, where his own countrymen +and equals by birth are settled under primitive conditions, and have +formed their rough codes of society. The intercourse with such people +would be a capital invested for life. The next two years should be +spent in the great towns of Europe, in order to remove awkwardness of +manner, prejudices of race and feeling, and to get the outward forms of +a European citizen. All this would sharpen his wits, give him more +interest in life, more keys to knowledge. It would widen his horizon. +Then, and not a minute sooner, to the University, where he would go not +as a child but a man capable of enjoying its real advantages, attend +lectures with profit, acquire manners instead of mannerisms and a +University tone instead of a University taint. What do you think?" + +"It sounds a trifle revolutionary," commented the bishop, with a smile. +"But it appeals to me. Education is a matter than lies very near my +heart. In fact, I had some thoughts of retiring from the Church and +devoting myself to it. I feel, I don't know why, as if I could do more +in that direction." + +Keith merely observed: + +"That is interesting. Perhaps you have reached the end of the Church." + +He liked this young Colonial bishop, and his straightforward, earnest +face. Being of a complicated nature himself, he was always drawn +towards men of single aims and purposes. + +The other would have been pleased to know why Keith found it +"interesting" and what he meant by that other phrase, but forbore to +inquire. He was rather a silent man, though not deficient in mother +wit. He lit a cigarette, and waited. + +"Let us discourse of education!" said his host with that elaborate +manner which the bishop afterwards discovered to be peculiar to him. "I +think we need not differentiate between the sexes. In proportion as +more careers are opened to women, their teaching will tend to converge +with that of men. That specifically female education in domestic arts +has been rendered superfluous by commercial products. I will tell you +what I think. A sound schooling should teach manner of thought rather +than matter. It should have a dual aim--to equip a man for hours of +work, and for hours of leisure. They interact; if the leisure is +misspent, the work will suffer. As regards the first, we cannot expect +a school to purvey more than a grip of general principles. Even that is +seldom given. The second should enable a man to extract as much +happiness as possible out of his spare time. The secret of happiness is +curiosity. Now curiosity is not only not roused; it is repressed. You +will say there is not time for everything. But how much time is wasted! +Mathematics.... A medieval halo clings round this subject which, as +a training for the mind, has no more value than whist-playing. I wonder +how many excellent public servants have been lost to England because, +however accomplished, they lacked the mathematical twist required to +pass the standard in this one subject? As a training in intelligence it +is harmful: it teaches a person to underestimate the value of evidence +based on their other modes of ratiocination. It is the poorest form of +mental exercise--sheer verification; conjecture and observation are +ruled out. A study of Chinese grammar would be far more valuable from +the point of view of general education. All mathematics above the +standard of the office boy should be a special subject, like dynamics +or hydrostatics. They are useless to the ordinary man. If you mention +the utility of a mathematician like Isaac Newton, don't forget that it +was his pre-eminently anti-mathematical gift for drawing conclusions +from analogy which made him what he was. And Euclid--that frowsy +anachronism! One might as well teach Latin by the system of Donatus. +Surely all knowledge is valueless save as a guide to conduct? A guide +ought to be up to date and convenient to handle. Euclid is a museum +specimen. Half the time wasted over these subjects should be devoted to +draughtmanship and object-lessons. I don't know why we disparage +object-lessons; they were recommended by people like Bacon, Amos +Commenius and Pestalozzi. They are far superior to mathematics as a +means of developing the reasoning powers; they can be made as complex +as you please; they discipline the eye and mind, teach a child to +discriminate between the accidental and the essential, and demand +lucidity of thought and expression. And the hours spent over history! +What on earth does it matter who Henry the Twelfth's wife was? +Chemistry! All this, relatively speaking, is unprofitable stuff. How +much better to teach the elements of sociology and jurisprudence. The +laws that regulate human intercourse; what could be more interesting? +And physiology--the disrespect for the human frame is another relic of +monasticism. In fact our whole education is tainted with the monkish +spirit. Divinity! Has any purpose ever been served--" + +Mr. Keith sighed. + +"I wish I had not eaten so many of those prawns," he added. "What are +you thinking?" + +"I think modern education over-emphasizes the intellect. I suppose that +comes from the scientific trend of the times. You cannot obtain a +useful citizen if you only develop his intellect. We take children from +their parents because these cannot give them an intellectual training. +So far, good. But we fail to give them that training in character which +parents alone can give. Home influence, as Grace Aguilar conceived +it--where has it gone? It strikes me that this is a grave danger for the +future. We are rearing up a brood of crafty egoists, a generation whose +earliest recollections are those of getting something for nothing from +the State. I am inclined to trace our present social unrest to this +over-valuation of the intellect. It hardens the heart and blights all +generous impulses. What is going to replace the home, Mr. Keith? And +there is another point which has often forced itself upon me. A certain +proportion of wealthy children tend to fall back into lower grades of +life--manual labour, and so forth. They are born below the level of +their parents. No difficulty about relapsing. But a fair percentage of +the lowest classes tend to rise; they stand, potentially, above their +surroundings. An apparatus has been contrived for catching these +children. But it is defective, because devoid of sympathy. I have known +hundreds of cases in the East End of London where families have been +unable to raise themselves by this means because, at the critical +moment, there was not twenty shillings in the house wherewith to buy +clothes in which the child could present himself to a good employer +with any prospect of success. Worthy of a better fate, he is pushed +back. The chance is missed; the family remains in poverty. All kinds of +profitable and honourable capacities are being wasted in this fashion +every day--peculiar aptitudes for mechanics, talents for art, or music, +or acting--" + +"Acting!" interrupted Keith. "I am glad you reminded me. We are just in +time to see some theatricals at the municipality. They only come off +once a year. It would never do for you to miss them. No, never." + +The bishop, rather regretfully, rose from his seat. He was feeling +comfortable just then, and inclined to listen to a few more of Keith's +educational heresies. But that gentleman seemed to have exhausted the +subject, or himself. + +"It's only a few minutes' walk," he observed. "We'll take a couple of +sunshades." + +They stepped into the broiling heat. The morning mists had rolled away +from the mountains. + +Walking along, Mr. Heard began to realize what a rambling and craggy +sort of place this was. And how decorative! Almost operatic. The town +was full of surprises--of unexpected glimpses upon a group of slender +palms, some gleaming precipice, or the distant sea. Gardens appeared to +be toppling over the houses; green vines festooned the doorways and +gaily coloured porches; streets climbed up and down, noisy with +rattling carriages and cries of fruit-vendors who exposed their wares +of brightest hues on the pavement. Country women, in picturesque +cinnamon-coloured skirts, moved gravely among the citizens. The houses, +when not whitewashed, showed their building stone of red volcanic tufa; +windows were aflame with cacti and carnations; slumberous oranges +glowed in courtyards; the roadways underfoot were of lava--pitch-black. +It was a brilliant medley, overhung by a deep blue sky. The canvas was +indeed overcharged, as Denis had said. + +"There are no half-tones in this landscape," the bishop remarked to Mr. +Keith. "No compromise!" + +"And yet perfect harmony. They are all true colours. I hate compromise. +It is one of the curses of life. That is why I cannot endure England +for long. The country is full of half-tones, not only in nature. +Because a thing seems good, there must be some bad in it. It seems bad +to us--therefore it must be good for us. Bedlamites! I like clean +values. They make for clean thinking. This is the only day in the +year," he went on, "when you will see the population abroad at this +hour. The streets are generally quite empty. It is the only day when I +would forgo my afternoon nap on Nepenthe." + +"Nearly three o'clock," said the bishop, consulting his watch. "What a +queer time for theatricals!" + +"That Duke again. You can ask Eames about him, he must have been a man +worth knowing. He always slept in the afternoons. It annoyed him to +think that his people slept too. He might suddenly want them for +something, he said. He commanded that they should stay awake, and +decapitated several hundred who were found napping. When he saw that +the habit was ingrained in their natures and that nothing would avail +save a total extermination of the populace, he gave way, gracefully. +Then he instituted these popular theatricals in honour of the Patron +Saint, and fixed them irrevocably for the hour of three o'clock. He +meant to keep his faithful subjects awake on one afternoon of the year, +at all events. He took it for granted that they could never resist a +performance of this kind. He was right. He knew his people! That was +ages ago. We shall find the place crammed this afternoon." + +There was barely standing room, in spite of the sirocco heat. Mr. +Keith, by means of some mysterious formula, soon procured two seats in +the front row, the occupants of which smilingly took their places among +the crowd at the back. + +The bishop found himself sitting between his host and a +distinguished-looking elderly gentleman who turned out to be Count +Caloveglia. He was dressed in black. There was something alert and +military in that upright carriage, those keen eyes, bushy black brows +and snowy mustache. He uttered a few pleasant remarks on making Mr. +Heard's acquaintance, but soon relapsed into silence. Absorbed in the +spectacle, he sat motionless, his chin resting in the hollow of his +right hand. + +"A fine type," Keith whispered into the bishop's ear. "You will like +him. I call him the Salt of the South. If you are interested in the old +Greek life of these regions--well, he gives you an idea of those people. +He is the epitome of the Ionian spirit. I'll take you up to see him one +of these days." + +The performance consisted of a series of twelve scenes without words, +representing the twelve chief episodes in the life of the Patron Saint, +as portrayed in a certain marble frieze in the church. The actors were +a handful of the more attractive and intelligent children of the place. +They had been trained under the watchful eye of a priest who confessed +to some notions of stage-craft and delighted in juvenile theatricals. +It was a thrillingly realistic performance; the costumes--designed, long +ago, by the Good Duke himself--varied with every tableau. Vociferous +expressions of approval accompanied the performance. The Saint's +encounter in the grove of Alephane with the golden-haired lady was a +masterpiece of histrionic art; so was his solemn preaching among the +black natives. Tears flowed freely at his violent death--a scene which +was only marred by the erratic movements of his venerable beard; that +mill-stone, too, of PAPIER MACHE, played lovely pranks upon a pea-green +ocean. Best of all was the cannibalistic feast of the Crotalophoboi +ending with a tempestuous, demoniacal war-dance. Their blackened limbs +emerging from the scantiest of vesture, the actors surpassed +themselves. Such an uproar of applause accompanied the orgy that it had +to be repeated. + +Every year it had to be repeated, this particular tableau. It was by +far the most popular, to the intense regret of the PARROCO, the parish +priest, a rigid disciplinarian, an alien to Nepenthe, a frost-bitten +soul from the Central Provinces of the mainland. He used to complain +that times were changed; that what was good in the days of the Duke +might not be good for the present generation; that a scene such as this +was no incentive to true religion; that the Holy Mother of God could +hardly be edified by the performance, seeing that the players were +almost nude, and that certain of the gestures verged on indelicacy and +even immodesty. Every year he complained in like fashion: Ah, what +would the Madonna say, if she saw it? + +And every year the entire body of the local clergy, with Don Francesco +as their eloquent spokesman, opposed his views. + +The play was tradition, they avowed. Tradition must be upheld. And what +more? It savoured of heresy to suggest that the Mother of God was blind +to anything that happened on earth. Doubtless She saw this particular +scene; doubtless She approved; doubtless She smiled, like everyone +else. She loved her people in true motherly fashion. She was not born +in the Central Provinces. She was fond of children, whether they wore +clothes or not. The players enjoyed themselves. So did the audience. +The Mother of God liked them to make a cheerful show in honour of that +good old man, the Patron Saint. And Saint Dodekanus himself--what would +he think, if this ancient act of homage were withheld? He would be very +angry. He would send an earthquake, or a visitation of the cholera, or +a shower of ashes from the volcano across the water. Piety and prudence +alike counselled them to keep in his good graces. And what more? The +performance had been established by the Good Duke; and that endless +line of godly bishops, succeeding each other since his day, would never +have given their sanction to the costumes and the acting had they not +known that the Madonna approved of them. Why should She now think +differently? The Mother of God was not a fickle earthly creature, to +change Her mind from one day to the next. + +With arguments such as these they endeavoured to controvert the PARROCO +who, being a fighter to the death, a resourceful ascetic of unbending +will, never admitted defeat. He bethought him of other shifts. On one +celebrated occasion he actually induced the bishop--tired as the old +prelate was, after his morning's ride on the white donkey--to attend the +performance, hoping to obtain from him some confirmation of his own +view, that the objectionable scene should be entirely remodelled or, +better still, cut out altogether. The reverend dignitary was supposed +to be extremely short-sighted and wandering, moreover, in his mind, +from sheer decrepitude. Perhaps he was wily beyond the common measure +of man. Be that as it may, he witnessed the spectacle but allowed +nothing to escape his lips safe a succession of soft purring sound +resembling: + +Gu-gu-gu-gu-gu-gu-gu-gu-gu-, + +An ambiguous utterance, which was construed by both parties as a +verdict in their favour. + +Mr. Heard, while conceding that the acting was good--first rate, in +fact--could not make up his mind whether to be shocked or pleased. He +wondered whether such a play had any features in common with religion. +His host, who stood for paganism and nudity and laughter, convinced him +that it had. + +"You would have seen the same thing in pre-Puritan England," he +concluded, at the end of a long exposition. "And now, if you like, we +will have a look at that Club. It may amuse you. There is still time +for the Duchess." + + + + + + +CHAPTER V + + + + + +"This is the place," said Mr. Keith. + +It was one of a row of tawdry modern buildings, the lower floors of +which were utilized as shops--an undistinguished sort of place, in an +undistinguished street. They climbed upstairs and wandered through two +or three rooms, all alike save that one of them had a balcony; square, +white-washed rooms, not very clean, and inadequately furnished with +tables, cane-bottomed chairs and a few prints on the walls. There was a +lavish display, however, of bottles and glasses, and several shelves +were littered with newspapers in different languages. Acetylene lamps +hung from the flat ceiling. An odour of stale tobacco and alcohol +pervaded the premises. Flies were buzzing against the window-panes. + +Half a dozen nondescript members, looking considerably the worse for +wear, loafed about moodily or snored in deck chairs. Two or three were +writing letters. It was the sulkiest hour of the day. Mr. Heard noticed +a slender young Indian and a blond-haired fellow--probably a +Scandinavian. They were arguing about cigars with a rosy-cheeked old +reprobate whom they called Charlie. An adjoining apartment, the +card-room, contained a livelier party, among whom the bishop recognized +Mr. Muhlen. He had lost no time in making himself popular. He must have +found congenial spirits here. + +"Well?" asked Keith. + +"Cheap and nasty," suggested the other. + +"That's it! They call it the Alpha and Omega Club, to shadow forth its +all-embracing international character; it's just a boozing institution, +where you run to seed. They come in here, and say the south wind makes +them thirsty. Red and Blue Club would be a more appropriate name. That +is the whisky they have to drink." + +"Why cannot they drink wine or--or ginger beer?" + +"He tries to stop that. He would not be able to make any profits on +wine." + +"Who?" + +"The President." + +And Mr. Keith proceeded to sketch the history of the establishment. + +The Alpha and Omega Club had led a precarious existence. Often its life +dangled by a thread for lack of members, or because those members who +owed subscriptions were unable or unwilling to pay them. Such had been +the case before the accession of the new President. It hung its +drooping head; had almost withered away. Mr. Freddy Parker tended the +languid flower, and watered it--with whisky of his own composition. + +It revived. Or rather (which amounts to the same thing) Mr. Parker +revived--sufficiently, at all events, to pay off some of the more +pressing of his private debts. Napoleon, or somebody, once remarked: +"L'ETAT, C'EST MOI." Mr. Parker thought highly of a strong character +like Napoleon. He used to say, when talking things over with his lady +in her "boudoir" at the Residency: + +"The Club, that's me." + +Declaring that wine was the ruin of the place, he imported--it was the +lady's idea, originally--the far-famed "Red-and-Blue" brand of whisky in +barrels. The liquid was bottled in the cellars of the Residency. What +happened during that process was never revealed. It was affirmed, none +the less, that one barrel of the original stuff was more than enough +for three barrelfuls of the bottled product. Cultured members, on +drinking it, were wont to say things about Locusta and Borgia. The +commoner sort swore like hell at Freddy Parker. It made you feel +squiffy after the sixth glass--argumentative, magisterial, maudlin, +taciturn, erotic, sentimental, sea-sick, ecstatic, paralysed, +lachrymose, hilarious, pugilistic--according to your temperament. +Whatever your temperament it gave you a thundering head next morning, +and a throat like Nebuchadnezzar's fiery furnace. It was known as +"Parker's poison." + +The stuff was served, at an alluring price, out of bottles adorned with +a seductive label--a label which had been designed by an impecunious +artist who, after running up a rousing bill for drinks, got off payment +on the strength of this job. But the prettiest label in the world could +not atone for the mixture within. Members often complained of feeling +queer. They threatened to resign. Mr. Parker did not want them to +resign; he wanted their subscriptions. He had a grand way with him on +such occasions. Whenever one of them complained too bitterly or too +persistently--became damned abusive, in fact--he would patiently wait and +see which was the fellow's favourite newspaper. That point settled--it +was his lady's idea, originally--he would stop the supply of the journal +in question, alleging insufficiency of Club revenues. These +Napoleon-like tactics generally brought the offending member to his +senses. + +Mr. Frederick Parker spent a good deal of his time in endeavouring to +mask, under a cloak of boisterous good humour, a really remarkable +combination of malevolence and imbecility. He was what you call a +remittance man. He got so much a quarter--a miserable sum it was--to keep +out of England. He travelled about formerly. But no amount of travel, +no association with his betters, could pierce his stolid pachydermatous +obliquity. He was the worst kind of Englishman; he could not even cheat +without being found out. But for the wise counsels of his lady he would +have been in the lock-up over and over again. Such being the case, he +took a justifiable pride in his Anglo-Saxon origin. Whenever a project +seemed too risky--not worth while, he called it--he would say: + +"It can't be done. That's a job for a Dago. I'm an Englishman, you +know." + +He had knocked about the world a good bit, had Mr. Parker. His last +known domicile was Nicaragua. There he invested in some land affair--a +most unfortunate speculation, as it turned out. All his speculation had +a way of turning badly. That was because people, even people in +Nicaragua, distrusted him for one reason or another; they said his +whole existence was a tangle of shady and ignoble transactions--that he +looked like a fraud, and behaved like one. He couldn't help his face; +but his face, they soon discovered, was not the only, or even the most, +evasive and fugitive part of his personality. + +At last Nicaragua, even Nicaragua, got too hot for him. + +There was Don Pomponio di Vergara y Puyarola, Nicaraguan Minister of +Finance; one might come to terms with a man of that kind. It was +arranged between them that His Excellency, who had a large family and +many poor dependents, should take over Mr. Parker's landed interests; +being a native of the place he might succeed in squeezing a little +something out of them. In exchange for this concession an unobtrusive +Government job was specially created for Mr. Parker. He was appointed +Financial Commissioner for South-Eastern Europe, to reside at Nepenthe +or wherever else he pleased--unpaid; the exalted social status conferred +by such a post being deemed ample compensation. His sole duty consisted +of submitting a short annual report, a pure formality, to his +Government. + +He departed, but not alone. With him went his familiar spirit, his +guardian angel, his lady, his step-sister--a dusky dame of barn-like +proportions. Arrived at Nepenthe they rented a small villa, rather out +of the way, which they called the Residency. The change of climate did +them good. So did the appointment. He was now a person of +consequence--the sole representative of a Foreign Power on the island. +His official rank procured him not only dignity and a new start in life +but, what was still more urgent, credit. It brought him into contact +with the local authorities--with the red-haired rachitic judge, for +instance, between whom and Mr. Parker there sprang up an intimacy which +was viewed with vague forebodings. The lady, being a Catholic--Mr. +Parker, too, was suspected of Roman proclivities--was confessed by the +parish priest. That was a point gained; the PARROCO being above +suspicion, among foreigners at least. She stayed mostly indoors, +inventing scandals about people and writing voluminous letters to warn +new-comers of the appalling immorality of the place. + +To outward appearance the Commissioner and his lady agreed like a brace +of turtle-doves. He, too, was a moral and social reformer. But men must +live. The refined social status attached to Mr. Parker's honorary post +producing nothing tangible in the way of ready cash, he began to cast +about for some means of livelihood. They wre getting into debt once +more. Something must be done, he declared. + +His portly presence, flushed countenance, briar pipe, knickerbockers +and white spats had already become a familiar object in the streets of +the town, when a terrible uproar at the Club--one of those periodical, +approximately monthly, rows at which the police, who hated meddling +with foreigners, were reluctantly compelled to intervene--suggested to +her that something might be done in that direction. She got him elected +President for that year, President for the next, the next, and the +next; in spite of the fact that, according to the rules, a new +President had to be elected every year. Who cared about rules? He was +the Commissioner! People were only too glad to have him there. In fact, +like Napoleon, he became a sort of Dictator. + +He was now in his element. There were emoluments to be picked up +here--percentages, perquisites, and profits of all kinds. He made a +little arrangement with the Club laundry-woman to take in his own +washing as well, gratis. Under the threat of placing the Club custom +elsewhere he concluded a number of treaties, each containing a secret +clause which referred to fifteen per cent profit for himself, with the +grocer who supplied provisions; and with other tradespeople dealing in +stationery, soap, crockery (broken crockery was a heavy item in the +accounts) and such--like Club necessaries. Next, he took the landlord in +hand. He would clear out, by God, and take more respectable premises if +the rent were not reduced by twenty per cent! Scandalous! Downright +robbery! The landlord being a reasonable sort of man, it was agreed +that the old rate should stand in the contract, while the balance of +twenty per cent found its way into Mr. Parker's pockets, and not, as +theretofore, into his own. The same with the servants. From the boy who +cleaned the rooms, and whom he changed as often as ever possible, he +exacted a monetary deposit as a guarantee of good conduct--a deposit +which was never returned, whatever his behaviour had been. Then--the +subscriptions. For of course the accounts were never audited; nobody +bothered about such things on Nepenthe, with all that south wind +hanging about. If they had been he would have squared the auditor up to +any sum--a hundred francs, almost; it was worth while. Pickings, he +called them. The place, the system suited him down to the ground. He had +lived all his life on pickings. He was a retail welsher; he lacked the +nerve for sweeping enterprises. + +On his accession, the Club was in such a state of demoralization, had +become such a public scandal, that Mr. Parker, in his capacity of +moralist, would have been the first person to dissolve that assembly of +topers and rakes. As financier, he meant to live by it. But how was the +place to be purified? + +Parker's poison solved that problem, besides yielding a fine slice of +additional revenue. The hardest drinkers, the inveterate rowdies, +refused to believe that it was anything but the ordinary whisky to +which they had been accustomed from childhood; or believing, refused +out of sheer boastfulness, or force of habit, to reduce their doses. +While the moderate realized the truth and acted accordingly, these +others insisted upon regarding it as genuine Scotch--with inevitable and +dire results. They succumbed. During the first year of Freddy Parker's +reign, eight of these stubborn sinners were carried to their graves. +And year by year, the same causes being in action, the process of +betterment went on. Extremists dropped off, moderates survived. The +Club was purged of its grosser elements, the moral tone of the +establishment was raised, through the operation of Parker's poison. It +was Napoleon's way with the Paris Parliament, he once explained to his +lady, who wondered vaguely how long the hero himself would have +outlived the effects of that mixture which she brewed, with her own +fair hands, in the dim vaults of the Residency. + +Even now it was a pretty tough place. New crooks, like the dubious Mr. +Hopkins, new fire-eaters, new cranks, new sots, were always dropping in +from different corners of the globe to spread their infection among the +more recent crowd of curio-hunters, gentlemen of commerce, nautical +wrecks, decayed missionaries, painters, authors and other vagrant +riff-raff who frequented the premises. There were rows going on all the +time--insignificant rows, mostly about newspapers and gambling debts. +Mr. Samuel got his eye blacked over a harmless game of ecarte; Mr. +White, one of the steadiest members, threatened to withdraw his +subscription on account of the black-beetles; a Swedish sea-captain +smashed nine panes of glass--just by way of a friendly demonstration, he +said--because the great Upsala journal, the UTAN STAFVEL, was missing +from its shelf; a muscular Japanese made himself distinctly offensive +about the NICHI-NICHI-SHIN-BUM being out of date, and was going to +twist everybody's head off, if it occurred again; the excellent +Vice-President, Mr. Richards, tumbled noisily downstairs, nobody knew +how or why--all on a single afternoon. The sirocco happened to be +particularly trying that day. + +On the whole, there was no denying the fact that the Club flourished +under the statesman-like autocracy of Mr. Parker. That was partly +because, unlike previous presidents, he was generally on the spot. Some +great man once made a remark about the need of "the Master's Eye." He +believed in that remark. If you run a place, run it yourself. He was +ever-present, absorbing at other people's expense his own poison, to +the effects of which he seemed to be immune; and borrowing money, on +the sly, from the richer and more forgetful members. His uproarious +joviality, his echoing ha! ha! became a feature of the place; it +deceived the simple, and amused the complex. He was ready to talk about +anything with anybody who shoved along; he had a fund of naughty +tropical stories for the so-called bawdy section, and could be as +sympathetic and pious as you please with a contrite youngster suffering +from last night's debauch. + +"A hair of the dog," he would suggest with a genial wink, pushing the +bottle temptingly nearer. + +The regulations had also been improved under his auspices. The entrance +fee was imperceptibly raised, while the conditions of entry were +relaxed. It was his lady's idea originally. She made it clear that the +more numerous the members the greater the quantity of whisky +consumed--the greater, therefore, their profits; quite apart from the +possibility of additional subscriptions being paid. He agreed. Then, in +a sudden glow of commercial enthusiasm, he proceeded to hint that +ladies should also be admitted. Regretfully she put her foot down. +Anywhere else the proposal would have been welcome. It was out of the +question on Nepenthe. + +"You're forgetting that Wilberforce woman," she said. "She would have +to be carried home every night. It couldn't be done, Freddy. We might +as well shut up the shop at once. People would get talking about the +place--you know how they talk, as it is." + +Miss Wilberforce was a pathetic local figure, a lady by birth, with a +ready tongue, wiry limbs, and an insatiable craving for alcohol. She +would unavoidably have damaged the reputation of the place, to say +nothing of its furniture. She had gone from bad to worse lately. + +"Perhaps you're right, Lola. It isn't worth while for those few +subscriptions. After all, I'm an Englishman. But how about all those +Russians?" he added. + +"I've often told you to let them in, Freddy." + +"So you have, dear! It was your idea originally. Well, I must think it +over again." + +He thought it over and regretfully came to the conclusion that it could +not be done. Russians were not people of the right kind. They were not +honest. + +"Russians are too artistic to be honest," he declared. + +It was a BON MOT which he had picked up, long ago, from Madame +Steynlin, in the days when the lady looked with disfavour on the +Muscovite colony. That Lutheran period was over for the present: she +was orthodox so far as sentiments were concerned. Nothing could be good +enough for the Russians, just then. An acquaintance with Peter, one of +the handsomest of the whole batch of religious enthusiasts, had brought +about her psychological conversion and altered her outlook upon life. +Her heart was in the Urals. But that stupid, malicious epigram had +impressed itself on the mind of Mr. Parker, who was hopelessly +insensitive to the flaxen curls of Peter. + +"No," he decided. "They are not honest. We must draw the line +somewhere, Lola. I draw it at Russians. At least I think we ought to. +But I'll think it over again." + +That was foolish of him, she opined. For the Muscovites would probably +have paid their accounts as regularly as other members; and as to their +capacity for raising the Club revenues by the destruction of +alcohol--why, many people had said unkind things about them, and yet +nobody had gone so far as to accuse them of being unable to stow it +away in proper Christian style. No wonder. Because there was nothing +whatever in their Bible, the GOLDEN BOOK of the divinely inspired +Bazhakuloff, to prohibit or even limit the consumption of strong +waters. In the matter of dietary he had only bidden them refrain from +the flesh of warm-blooded beasts. + +Mr. Parker was always thinking things over and coming to the wrong +conclusion. It was foolish of him. + +She knew him too well to say anything more for the moment. She would +have to bide her time because Freddy, of whom she had made an +exhaustive study, was a wobbler, and worse than a wobbler. He was +stubborn at the wrong season and difficult to manage. He needed careful +motherly guidance. All fools, she reflected, were subject to meteoric +gleams of common sense. He was no exception to that rule. But whereas +they received such flashes with thankfulness, he persisted in regarding +them as inspirations of the devil. That was the tragedy of Freddy +Parker. It made him into something quinessential--a kind of super-fool.... + +Mr. Keith enquired: + +"You don't want to become a member of this institution, do you, +Bishop?" + +The other pondered awhile. + +"I am pretty democratic," he replied. "We have some warm places in +Africa, you know, and I never allowed myself to be beaten by them. +Perhaps I might be of use to some of those poor fellows in there. But I +like to do things properly. It would entail at first a little friendly +drinking, I'm afraid, in order to gain their confidence. It is not in +my character to do one thing and preach another. I cannot pose as an +abstainer after the way I enjoyed your luncheon. But the smell of the +whisky here--it scares me. My liver--" + +"Ah, yes!" said Mr. Keith with a sigh. "No wonder you hesitate. It is +quite disheartening, all that drunkenness." + + + + + + +CHAPTER VI + + + + + +It stands to reason that the Duchess was not a Duchess at all. She was +American by birth, from some Western state, and her first husband had +been an army man. Her second spouse--he, too, had died long ago--was +Italian. In view of his passionate devotion to the Catholic Church and +of a further payment of fifty thousand francs, he had been raised to +the rank of Papal Marquis. He died relatively young. Had his life been +spared, as it ought to have been, he might well have become a Papal +Duke in course of time. He was carried off by an accident not of his +own contriving--run over by a tramcar in Rome--before that further ducal +premium was even expected to be paid. But for this, he ought to have +died a Duke. He would have been a Duke, by this time. + +His widow, taking these things into consideration, felt it her duty to +appropriate the more sonorous of the two titles open to her. Nobody +contested her claim. All her friends, on the contrary, declared that +she talked like a peeress and behaved like one; and in a world where +the few remaining authentic specimens of that class fail to fulfil +either the one or the other of these conditions, it was thought meet +and proper that somebody should be good enough to carry on, if only in +semblance, and if only in Nepenthe, the traditions of a race rapidly +approaching extinction. It was pleasant to be able to converse with a +Duchess at any hour of the day, and this one was nothing if not +accessible so long as you were fairly well clothed, had a reasonably +supply of small talk and did not profess violent anti-papal sentiments. + +Some people said she dressed like a Duchess, but there was less +unanimity on this point. Her handsome oval face and towering grey hair +induced her to cultivate an antique pose, with a view to resembling "La +Pompadour." La Pompadour stood for something courtly and powdered. She +certainly dressed better and on far less money than Madame Steynlin, +whose plump figure, round sunburnt cheeks, and impulsive manner would +never have done for an old-world beauty, and who cared little what +frocks she wore, so long as somebody loved her. The Duchess had all the +aplomb of La Pompadour, but not much of her French accent. Her Italian, +too, was somewhat embryonic. That mattered little. The external +impression, the grand manner, was everything. She was not lame, though +she generally leaned on somebody's arm or a stick. It was rather a +pretty stick. She would have worm a pomander in her hair, or on a +chatelaine, if anybody had told her what a pomander was. As her friends +were unable to enlighten her--Mr. Keith even hinting that it was an +object which could not be mentioned in polite society--she contented +herself with a couple of patches. + +Her rooms in that disused convent were an interminable suite of +rectangular chambers, unpretentious but solidly built, with straight +corridors running alongside. You beheld pretty pavements of +old-fashioned tiles, not overmuch furniture, one or two portraits of +the Pope, and abundance of flowers and crucifixes. The Duchess +specialized in flowers and crucifixes. Everybody, aware of her fondness +for them, gave her either the one or the other, or both. An elaborate +arrangement for tea occupied one of the rooms; there was also a cold +buffet for gentlemen--brandies and wines and iced soda-water and lobster +sandwiches and suchlike. + +A many-tongued conversation filled the air with pleasant murmurs. +Various nationalities were represented, though the Russian colony was +conspicuous by its absence. The Duchess, like Mr. Freddy Parker, drew +the line at Russians. If only they would not dress so oddly, with those +open collars, leathern belts, and scarlet blouses! The judge, also, was +never asked to come--he was too outspoken a freethinker, and too fond of +spitting on the floor. Nor did Mr. Eames put in an appearance. He +avoided social obligations; his limited means preventing him from +making any adequate return. But there was an ample display of +ecclesiastics, together with a few other notabilities. Mr. Heard +encountered some familiar faces, and made new friends. He felt drawn +towards Madame Steynlin--she had such a cheerful bright face. + +"And how delightfully cool these rooms are!" he was saying to the +Duchess. "I wonder how you manage to keep the sirocco out?" + +"By closing the windows, Bishop. English people will not believe that. +They open their windows. In comes the heat." + +"If English people closed their windows they would die," said Don +Francesco. "Half the houses in England would be condemned by law in +this country and pulled down, on account of their low ceilings. Low +ceilings have given the Englishman his cult of fresh air. He likes to +be cosy and familiar and exclusive; he has no sense for broad social +functions. There is something of the cave-dweller in every Englishman. +He may say what he likes, but the humble cottage will always remain his +dream. You can tell the ideals of a nation by its advertisements. This +country is pastoral. That is why our advertisements are so apt to +portray commercial conditions--enormous factories and engines and +chimneys; we are dissatisfied with our agricultural state. The +Frenchman's aspiration is woman; Paris hoardings will tell you that. +England is a land of industrial troglodytes, where every man's cavern +is his castle. Its advertisements depict either gross masses of food +such as cave-dwellers naturally relish, or else quiet country +scenes--green lanes, and sunsets, and peaceful dwellings in the country. +Home, sweet home! The cottage! That means open windows or suffocation.... +I think I see the person who spoke to you on the steamer," he +added to Mr. Heard. "I don't like his looks. He is coming our way." + +"That must be Mr. Muhlen," exclaimed the Duchess. "They say he played +beautifully at the hotel last night. I wonder whether I could induce +him to try my Longwood? It's rather an old model, I fear, and out of +tune." + +The gentleman appeared, ostentatiously dressed and escorted by Mr. +Richards, the Vice-President of the Alpha and Omega Club, who seemed to +be fairly steady on his legs and was presently absorbed in an artistic +examination of a number of silver ornaments, crucifixes, relics and +suchlike objects of virtu, which the Duchess had gathered together. He +handled them like a connoisseur. Others of that institution had +promised to attend the party but, on being overhauled by the +conscientious Vice-President, were found to be unpresentable at the +last moment. + +The Duchess moved away to greet him. Mr. Heard remarked to Don +Francesco: + +"That middle-aged colleague of yours, yonder--he has an unusual face." + +"Our parish priest. A sound Christian!" + +The PARROCO'S thin lips, peaked nose, beady eyes and colourless cheeks +proclaimed the anchorite, if not the monomaniac. He flitted about like +a draught of cold air, refusing all refreshments and not daring to +smell the flowers, lest he should derive too much pleasure from them. +He was often called Torquemada, from his harsh and abstemious habits. +The name had been given him, of course, by his brother priests who knew +about such matters, and not by the common people to whom the word +Torquemada would have suggested, if anything, a savoury kind of +pudding. Torquemada was capable of any sacrifice, of any enormity, in +defence of the faith. A narrow medieval type, he was the only person on +Nepenthe who would have been hewn in pieces for his God--nobody allowing +themselves to be even temporarily incommoded in so visionary a cause. +He enjoyed a reputation of perfect chastity which differentiated him +from all the remaining priests and contributed, more than anything +else, to his unpopularity. It enraged the frankly carnal natives to +such an extent that they made insinuations about his bodily health and +told other horrible stories, swore they were true, and offered to give +statistical figures in confirmation. They said, among other things, +that after begging money from wealthy foreigners for alleged repairs to +the parish organ and other godly purposes, he kept the proceeds himself +on the principle that charity began at home and ought to end there. +Nobody could deny his devotion to mother, sisters, and even distant +relatives. So much was also certain, that the PARROCO'S family was +poor. + +Harp-like tinklings arose from an adjoining chamber; a general move +took place in that direction. Mr. Keith was there. He sat beside Madame +Steynlin who, being a fair performer herself, was listening with +rapture to Muhlen's strains. During a pause he said: + +"I wish I could make it out. It annoys me, Madame Steynlin, not to +comprehend the charm of music. I would give almost anything to the +person who can satisfy me that what I hear is not a succession of +unnecessary noises." + +"Perhaps you are not musical." + +"That would not prevent my understanding the feelings of people like +yourself. I don't want to be musical. I want to get a grip of this +thing. I want to know. Tell me why you like it and why I don't. Tell +me--" + +The sounds began again. + +"Ah!" said the Duchess, "that wonderful ANDANTE CON BRIO!" + +Then, as the strains grew louder, she whispered to Don Francesco upon a +subject which had always puzzled her. + +"I would be glad to learn," she said, "why our parliamentary +representative, Commendatore Morena, has never yet visited Nepenthe. +Surely it is his duty to show himself now and then to his +parishioners--constituents, I mean? This festival of Saint Dodekanus +would have been such a good opportunity. His appearance would have been +a discomfiture for the free-thinkers. Every year he promises to come. +And every year he fails us. Why?" + +"I cannot tell," replied the priest. "The animal has probably got other +things to do." + +"The animal? Ah, don't say that! And such a good Catholic!" + +"Foreigners, dear Duchess, I leave to your judgment. They are of little +account, anyhow. But you will be guided by me in your appreciation of +the worldly qualities of natives. Otherwise, with all your +intelligence, it will be impossible for you to avoid mistakes. Let us +leave it at that." + +"But why--" + +"We will leave it at that, dear lady!" + +"Indeed we will, Don Francesco," replied the Duchess, who loved to be +ruled in matters of this kind. + +At this moment, the performer rose from the piano with unexpected +suddenness remarking SOTTO VOCE that if he had known he was to play on +a spinet he would have brought some Lulli with him. He was beaming all +over, none the less, and soon making arrangements with other guests for +a series of picnics and boating excursions--getting on swimmingly, in +fact, when the thoughtless Madame Steynlin captured him and began to +talk music. He repeated that remark, too good to be lost, about the +spinet; it led to Scarlatti, Mozart, Handel. He said Handel was the +saviour of English music. She said Handel was its blight and damnation. +Each being furnished with copious arguments, the discussion degenerated +into technicalities. + +Denis, meanwhile, was handing round tea-cakes and things, with the +double object of making himself useful and of being as near as possible +to Angelina, the hand-maiden of the Duchess, a bewitchingly pretty +brunette, who was doing the same. Perhaps the existence of Angelin +accounted for his respectful attentions and frequent visits to the +Duchess. He felt he was really in love for the first time in his life. + +He worshipped from afar. He would have liked to worship from a little +nearer, but did not know how to set about it; he was afraid of +troubling what he called her innocence. Hitherto he had scored no great +success. Angelina, aged fifteen, with the figure of a fairy, a glowing +complexion, and a rich southern voice, was perfectly aware of his +idealistic sentiments. She responded to the extent of gazing at him, +now and then, in a most disconcerting fashion. It was as though she +cared little about idealism. She did not smile. There was neither love +nor disdain in that gaze; it was neither hot nor cold, nor yet +lukewarm; it was something else, something he did not want at +all--something that made him feel childish and uncomfortable. + +And another pair of eyes were watching all the time, her sinuous +movements--those of Mr. Edgar Marten. This young scientist, too, +cherished loving thoughts about Angelina, thoughts of a more earthly +and volcanic tinge; certain definite projects which made him forget, at +times, his preoccupation with biotite, perlite, magnetite, anorthite, +and pyroxene. + +"Denis," said Keith, in his usual pompous fashion. "Do put down that +absurd tray and let people help themselves. Listen to me for a moment. +How do you like this place? I am not asking out of vulgar curiosity; I +am anxious to know the impressions of a person of your age and +antecedents. You might collect them for me, will you? Not now. One day +when you are in the mood. Somewhat terrestrial and palpitating, is it +not, after the cloistered twilight of a University?" + +"I came here from Florence," observed Denis. + +"And even after Florence! Do you know why? Because mankind dominates in +Tuscany. The land is encrusted with ephemeral human conceits. That is +not altogether good for a youngster; it disarranges his mind and puts +him out of harmony with what is permanent. Just listen a moment. Here, +if you are wise, you will seek an antidote. Taken in over-doze, all +these churches and pictures and books and other products of our species +are toxins for a boy like you. They falsify your cosmic values. Try to +be more of an animal. Try to extract pleasure from more obvious +sources. Lie fallow for a while. Forget all these things. Go out into +the midday glare. Sit among rocks and by the sea. Have a look at the +sun and stars for a change; they are just as impressive as Donatello. +Find yourself! You know the Cave of Mercury? Climb down, one night of +full moon, all alone, and rest at its entrance. Familiarize yourself +with elemental things. The whole earth reeks of humanity and its works. +One has to be old and tough to appraise them at their true worth. Tell +people to go to Hell, Denis, with their altar-pieces and museums and +clock-towers and funny little art-galleries." + +Everybody is always giving me advice, thought Denis. And the worst of +it is, it's often sound. + +A melodious voice added: + +"If, after that lecture, you still have some crotchety appreciation +left for the works of man, you may be interested, when next you visit +the Old Town, to look at some busts and other curiosities of mine. +There is a little Greek bronze I would like to show you, though perhaps +we had better not talk too openly about it. Pray come. You will extract +pleasure from that statuette. And I will extract pleasure from your +company. Obvious sources of pleasure, aren't they, Keith?" + +It was Count Caloveglia. He was referring to the Locri Faun, a +wonderful antique which had recently been found on his property near +the town of that name on the neighbouring mainland, and was about to be +secretly smuggled out of Italy. He smiled in winning fashion as he +spoke. Like everyone else, Denis had fallen under the spell of this +attractive and courteous old aristocrat who was saturated to the very +marrow in the lore of antiquity. There was sunshine in his glance--a +lustrous gem--like grace; one realized from his conversation, from his +every word, that he had discarded superfluities of thought and browsed +for a lifetime, in leisurely fashion, upon all that purifies and exalts +the spirit. Nothing, one felt, would avail to ruffle that deep pagan +content. + +"And how," he continued, addressing Denis, "are your Italian studies +progressing?" + +"Fairly well, thank you. My French puts me out a little. And I can't +yet conjugate properly." + +"That is certainly a drawback," said Don Francesco, appearing on the +scene. "But don't let it trouble you," he added in paternal tones. "It +will come in time. You are still young. You are learning Russian, +Madame Steynlin?" + +"Only a few words." She blushed becomingly. "There are certain sounds, +like water being poured into a jug--neither easy nor pleasant. I am not +as quick as some people. Mrs. Meadows always speaks Hindustani to her +old Sicilian woman. She comprehends perfectly." + +"So clever these people are, at languages!" said the Duchess. + +Marten remarked: + +"I don't bother to learn Italian. I talk Latin to them. They understand +all right." + +"And what Latin, Marten!" laughed Denis. "No wonder they understand. +I'm coming to you on Thursday morning. Don't forget." + +"I have not had your public school advantages. But I manage to get what +I want out of them, generally speaking," and he cast a fiery glance in +the direction of Angelina, who returned it over her shoulder, +unabashed. Denis, fortunately, was looking the other way. + +"I wish I had enjoyed all your chances," observed the Duchess, with a +little mock-sigh. "We were so carelessly brought up. I learnt +practically nothing at school. It is a pity. Ah, Bishop! I forgot to +tell you. Such a charming note from your cousin. She cannot come. The +baby is teething and troublesome in this heat. You will have to drive +up, I'm afraid.... Mr. Keith, I have not yet thanked you for those +flowers and the book you sent. The flowers are quite too lovely. Look +at them! You are spoiling me--you really are! But I don't think I shall +like the book. Lady Cecilia and her maid and that man, I forget his +name--they do all sorts of things. They don't seem to be very nice +people." + +"You have nothing but nice people round you, Duchess. Why should you +want to read about them? There is so much goodness in real life. Do let +us keep it out of our books." + +"That sounds a dreadful doctrine. I see the PARROCO is about to take +his departure. Why does everybody leave so soon?" + +She wandered away. + +"The English are supposed to be bad linguists," said Don Francesco. "It +is one of those curious international fallacies, like saying the French +are a polite nation--" + +"Or that home-made marmalade tastes better than the stuff you buy in +shops," added Denis. "I must help the Duchess to say good-bye to those +people. She likes to have some one handy on such occasions. She needs +an echo. I am becoming quite a good echo." + +"You are," said Keith, rather sharply. "Quite a pretty echo. And you +ought to be a voice. Follow my prescription, Denis. The Cave of +Mercury." + +Count Caloveglia remarked: + +"What a pity that Latin, as scholars' language, for the definition and +registration of ideas, was ever abandoned! It has the incalculable +advantage that the meanings of words are irrevocably fixed by +authority. New ones could be coined as occasion required. Knowledge +would gain by leaps and bounds. There would be a cross-fertilization of +cultures. As things now stand, half the intellectuals of this world are +writing about matters which, unbeknown to themselves, have already been +treated by the other half. One would think that Commerce, which has +broken down geographical barriers, might have done the same to +political ones. Far from it! In sharpening men's lust for gold, it has +demarcated our frontiers with a bitterness hitherto unknown. The world +of thought has not expanded; it has contracted and grown provincial. +Men have lost sight of distant horizons. Nobody writes for humanity, +for civilization; they write for their country, their sect; to amuse +their friends or annoy their enemies. Pliny or Linneus or Humboldt--they +sat on mountain-tops; they surveyed the landscape at their feet, and if +some little valley lay shrouded in mist, the main outlines of the land +yet lay clearly distended before them. You will say that it is +impossible, nowadays, to gather up the threads of learning as did these +men; they are too multifarious, too divergent. A greater mistake could +not be imagined. For there is a contrary tendency at work--a tendency +towards unification. The threads converge. Medieval minds knew many +truths, hostile to one another. All truths are now seen to be +interdependent; never was synthesis easier of attainment. Conflict of +nationality and language hinders the movement. Mankind at large is the +loser. The adoption of a universal scholars' tongue would do much to +remove the obstacle. When these Southern races coalesce to form the +great alliance which I foresee, when the Mediterranean basin is once +more the centre of human activity as it deserves to be, some such plan +will doubtless be adopted." + +"Your notion would suit me down to the ground," said the bishop, who +was a good Latinist. "I would love to converse in the old style with a +student from Salamanca or Bergen or Khieff or Padua or--" + +Don Francesco gave utterance to some wholly unintelligible speech. Then +he observed: + +"The student might not be able to catch your meaning, Mr. Heard. I was +only talking Latin! You see, we would be obliged to standardize our +pronunciation. I wonder, by the way, why the old scholars' language was +ever discarded?" + +"Patriotism destroyed it," replied the Count. "That narrow modern +patriotism of the cock-on-the-dung-hill type." + +Mr. Keith began: + +"It is an atavistic and altogether discreditable phenomenon--this recent +recrudescence of monarchical principles--" + +"What did you promise about long words?" playfully enquired the +Duchess, who had just returned. + +"I cannot help it, dear lady. It is my mother's fault. She was so very +precise. I was carefully brought up." + +"That is a pity, Mr. Keith." + +"Northern people are very precise," said Don Francesco, folding his +gown around his ample limbs. "Particularly in love affairs. We down +here, who live in this sirocco, are supposed to be calculating and +mercenary in matters of the heart. We want dowries for our +daughters--they say we are always coming to the point: money, money! The +capacity of an English girl for coming to the point will take some +beating. She paralyses you with directness. I will tell you a true +story. There was a young Italian whom I knew--yes, I knew him well. He +had just arrived in London; very handsome in the face, though perhaps a +little too fat. He fell in love with an elegant young lady who was +employed in the establishment of Madame Elise in Bond Street. He used +to wait for her to come out at six o'clock and follow her like a dog, +not daring to speak. He carried a costly bracelet for her in his +pocket, and every day fresh flowers, which he was always too shy and +too deeply enamoured to present. She was his angel, his ideal. He +dreamt of her by day and night, wondering whether he would ever have +the courage to address so tall and queenly a creature. It was his first +English love affair, you understand; he learnt the proper technique +later on. For five or six weeks this unhappy state of things continued, +till one day, when he was running after her as usual, she turned round +furiously and said: 'What do you mean, sir, by following me about it +this disgusting fashion? How day you? I shall call the police, if it +occurs again.' He was deprived of speech at first: he could only gaze +in what you call dumb amazement. Then he managed to stammer out +something about his heart and his love, and to show her the flowers and +the bracelet. She said: 'So that's it, is it? Well of all the funny +boys. Why couldn't you speak up sooner? D'you know of a place round +here--'" + +"Ha, ha, ha!" + +It was a formidable explosion on the part of the Commissioner, in an +adjoining room. + +He was talking to some friends about Napoleon. + +They wanted a fellow like that on Nepenthe--a fellow who got things +done. Napoleon would have made no bones about the Wilberforce woman +over there. It was a scandalous state of affairs. What was the use of a +Committee for trying to keep her in order and getting her locked up in +a sanatorium? Everybody knew what a Committee meant. Committee! It was +a preposterous word. Committees were the same all the world over. +Committee! He was in charge of that particular one; they were dong all +they could, but what did it amount to? Nothing. To begin with, there +was not enough money coming in, unless somebody could wheedle a cheque +out of that rich old Koppen sensualist whose yacht might be arriving at +any moment. And then her own pig-headedness! She refused to be talked +over into doing what was in her own interests. Napoleon, he reckoned, +might have talked her over--ha, ha, ha! + +The lady in question, all unaware of these humanitarian designs, had +taken up a strategic position in the neighbourhood of the drinks, and +was glancing shyly round the room in search of a likely male who would +fetch her a stiff glass of something from the buffet, and that soon. +She was groggy, but not sufficiently primed to go there herself; she +knew that everybody's eye would be fixed upon her; she had been much +talked about of late. Drunk, she was impossible; dead sober, almost as +bad--haughty, sullen, logical, with a grieved and surprised air +suggestive of wounded dignity. + +People avoided Miss Wilberforce. And yet you could not help liking her +in those rare moments when she was just a little disguised. She had a +pretty wit, then; a residue of gentle nurture; tender instincts and a +winsomeness of manner that captivated you. Nor were appearances against +her. That frail, arrowy figure was invariably clothed in black. She +wore the colour by instinct. They said she had lost her sailor fiance +who was drowned, poor lad, in the Mediterranean; and that now she +wandered about at night looking for him, or trying to forget him and +seeking oblivion in tipple. + +The story happened to be true, for a wonder. She had received a twist +for life. The death of this young lover gave to her impressionable +being a shock which never passed off again. The world was turned inside +out for Amy Wilberforce. She seldom spoke of his fate. But she was +always talking about the sea. She tried to drown herself, once or +twice. Then, gradually, she put on a new character altogether and +relapsed into queer ancestral traits, stripping off, like so many +worthless rags, the layers of laboriously acquired civilization. The +refined and bashful girl became brusque, supercilious, equivocal. When +sympathizing friends said that they had also lost lovers, she laughed +and told them to look for new ones. There were better fish in the sea, +etc., etc. + +Soon she found herself abandoned, in spite of a full banking account. +People had dropped her, right and left. + +The years went by. + +Calmly, without misgivings and without fervour, she took to the bottle. + +Something drew her to Nepenthe--dim Mediterranean memories. Arrived +there, she used to engulf three pints of Martell and Hennessey, one +after the other, and then "wash them out"--such was her phraseology--with +a magnum of Perrier Jouet; a proceeding which, while it heightened her +complexion and gave a sparkle to her poor flustered eye, was not +conducive to the preservation of equilibrium in the lower limbs. There +resulted those periodical "nervous breakdowns" which necessitated +seclusion and sometimes medical treatment. The collapses had become +distressingly frequent with the last year or two. One of her many +drawbacks was that she courted publicity in her cups. She was perfectly +reckless as to what she then said, and had been known to bring a blush +to the seasoned cheek of Don Francesco himself who, unaware of her +condition at one particular moment, politely ventured to enquire why +she always wore black and was told that she was in mourning, as +everybody ought to mourn, for his lost innocence. Being an +Englishwoman, she was a thorn in the side of her moral compatriot the +Commissioner. + +Her noctambulous habits often brought her into contact with the local +police and sometimes with His Worship Signor Malipizzo. Greatly to the +surprise of Mr. Parker, the magistrate was observed to take a lenient +view of the case. None the less, she had passed several nights in the +local gaol. Staggering about the lanes of Nepenthe in the silent hours +before dawn, she was liable to be driven, at the bidding of some dark +primeval impulse, to divest herself of her raiment--a singularity which +perturbed even the hardiest of social night-birds who had the +misfortune to encounter her. Taxed with this freakish behaviour, she +would refer to the example of St. Francis of Assisi who did the same, +and brazenly ask whether he wasn't good enough for them? Whether she +couldn't give her last shirt to a beggar, as well as anybody else? In +short, there was nothing to be done with her. + +The dear lady, as Keith often called her, was becoming a real problem. + +And now her eye, roving round the room, fixed itself with the +drunkard's divine unerring instinct upon Denis. What a nice, modest, +gentlemanly-looking boy! Just what she wanted. + +"This sirocco!" she sighed, groping dramatically for a chair. "It makes +me feel so funny. Oh, dear! I shall go off in a faint. Ah, do be a kind +young man and fetch me some brandy and soda. A large tumbler. Ah, do! +And very little soda, please--on account of my heart. Only the smallest +drop!" + +She took two or three sips, paused awhile as though undecided whether +she could possibly swallow such nasty stuff and then, with a fine show +of reluctance, gulped it all down. Denis was spell-bound; the dose, he +artlessly imagined, was enough to kill a horse. Far from being damaged, +Miss Wilberforce took a chair beside him, and began to converse. +Charmingly she talked; all about England. As he listened he grew +delighted, entranced. She was different, somehow, from all the other +ladies he had lately met on the Continent. She was altogether +different. Whence came it, he wondered? + +Then, as the discourse proceeded, he began to realize what was the +matter with them. It was odd, he thought, that he had not noticed it +before. Miss Wilberforce made him realize wherein the difference lay. +They spoke English, it was true; but they had all taken on a +Continental outlook; alien phrases, expressions, affectations; +cosmopolitan airs and graces that jarred on his frank, untarnished +English nature. This one was otherwise. She was old England, through +and through. The conversation cheered him to an unusual degree--among +all those foreign people he felt strangely drawn towards this wistful +lady who could talk so naturally and conjure up, by the mere power of +words, a breath of his own homestead in the Midlands. He might have +been sitting with an elder sister just then, eating strawberries and +cream and watching a tennis match on some shady green lawn. He was +happy; happier still when Angelina once more floated into his ken and, +noticing Miss Wilberforce, raised her eyebrows mischievously and gave +him something that looked like a real smile, for a change. + +She had another smile, however, for Mr. Edgar Marten; and yet another +one for Don Francesco who, as she passed near him, profited by the +occasion to give her a paternal semi-proprietary chuck under the chin, +accompanying the indecorous movement with an almost audible wink. + +Mr. Heard had noticed everything. He frowned at first. It gave him a +little twinge, and some food for thought. He was absurdly sensitive +about women. + +"A frolicsome child," he mused. "LASCIVA PUELLA. Possibly wanton." + +What were this young man's relations with the girl? That contact of +hand and chin--what did it imply? Was the action quasi-paternal, or +pseudo-paternal? Regretfully he decided that it was only +pseudo-paternal. + +And yet--it was all so confoundedly natural! + +"Nobody but our PARROCO could keep his hands off that girl," blithely +remarked the priest. + +Another little twinge.... + + + + + + +CHAPTER VII + + + + + +Mr. Heard was not prone to wax enthusiastic over the delights of +architecture or natural scenery. He called himself unexpansive and +unromantic; he confessed to small understanding, small veneration, for +artistic effects. The beauty of a man's character moved him more +strongly than the beauty of any picture or any landscape. Yet, on +arriving next afternoon at the upper plateau of Nepenthe he could not +help being struck by the strange and almost compelling charm of the +"Old Town." It was so different from the lower regions--so calm and +reposeful. + +Down below, in that more accessible modern settlement, everything was +bright and many-tinted; there was movement and noise and colour; a +dazzling spot! The subtle influence of the sea, though it lay four +hundred feet lower down, was ever present; one felt oneself on an +island. On reaching these heights that feeling evaporated. You were +embowered in mighty trees, in the midst of which stood the Old Town. + +Unlike that other one, it faced due North; it lay, moreover, a few +hundred feet higher up. That alone could not have explained the +difference in temperature, one might say in climate, between the two. +To begin with, there was on this tiny upland basin exceptionally deep +soil, borne down by the rains of unnumbered centuries from the heights +overhead and enabling those shady oaks, poplars, walnuts and apples to +shoot up to uncommon size and luxuriance and screen away the sunny +beams. From above, meanwhile, a perennial shower descended. The +moisture-laden sirocco, tearing itself to shreds against the riven +summits of the high southern cliffs, dripped ceaselessly upon this +verdant oasis in clouds of invisible dew. You could often enjoy the +luxury of a shiver, at night-time, in the Old Town. + +It was a stronghold originally; built on these heights for the greater +security of the islanders against Saracenic inroads. When a more +peaceful era drew night the population began to decline; they found it +more convenient to establish themselves in the new settlement lower +down. Then came the Good Duke Alfred--that potentate who, as Mr. Eames +was wont to say, NIHIL QUOD TETIGIT NON ORNAVIT. He took a fancy to +this quaint old citadel which, before his day, could only be reached b +a rough mule-track easily defended against invaders. After constructing +a fine road of access with many twists and turnings, wide enough to +admit the passage of two of his roomy state carriages driving abreast, +he turned his mind to other improvements. Professing to be an admirer +of the good old times, he decided to keep up its traditional +character--it was to remain a fortress, in appearance if not reality. A +massive crenellated rampart, furnished with four gateways and +watch-towers at convenient intervals but serving no purpose in +particular, grew up around the place; every one of its houses which +failed to fit in with the design of this battlemented structure--and +there were a good many of them--was ruthlessly demolished. The Old Town +was enclosed in a ring. + +Desirous, next, of putting an end to the annoying exodus of the +natives, he fixed by law the number of inhabitants; there were to be +five hundred souls, neither more nor less. If in any one year the +population exceeded that figure, the surplus was taken away, from among +the adult males, to work as galley-slaves in his fleet; a deficiency in +the requisite number was met by giving new husbands from the lower +town, often three or four at a time "with a view to ensuring good +results," to those of the native women who had hitherto failed to +produce offspring. The system worked well. With some trifling but +reprehensive fluctuations, the birth-rate and the death-rate remained +even; things were at a standstill; a fact which caused His Highness to +be compared, by a courtly panegyrist, to Joshua who bade the sun arrest +his march across the heavens. Another of these gentlemen calls the +Duke's action a "triumph of art over nature," adding, not without a +grain of malice, that "never have the generative capacities of mankind +adapted themselves with more conspicuous success to the shape of an +unnecessary wall." Monsignor Perrelli, unfortunately, has nothing +whatever to say on the subject. For reasons which will appear anon, he +is remarkably silent on all that concerns the reign of his great +contemporary. + +Even so the Prince was not satisfied. The fastness was yet imperfect; +he disliked the variegated hues of the buildings--they reminded him of +the garish brilliance in the lower town. Something different had to be +contrived. He took thought and, being a man of taste and a decorist +where picturesque effects were concerned, decreed that the entire +place--walls, houses, the two convents (Benedictine and Carthusian), the +church, and even stables and pigsties--was to be painted a uniform pink: +"pink," he ordained, "without the slightest admixture of blue." He +desired, in fact, a kind of rose or flesh colour, a particular tint +which, he foresaw, would look well among the luscious verdure of the +surroundings. His behest, as usual, was obeyed without much loss of +time. + +Then he surveyed his work, and saw that it was good. He had created a +gem. The Old Town was a symphony in emerald and coral. + +So it remained. The inhabitants grew to be proud of their rosy citadel; +it was an unwritten law among them that every new house should adapt +itself to this tone. For the rest, there was not much building done +after his death, with the exception of a few isolated villas that +sprang up, despite his old commands, in the neighbourhood. And the +decline in population once more set in. Men forsook the place--all save +the peasantry who tilled the surrounding fields. Towers and battlements +crumbled to earth; roadways heaved uneasily with grassy tufts that +sprouted in the chinks of the old paving-blocks. Sometimes at decline +of day a creaking hay-waggon would lumber along, bending towards a +courtyard in whose moss-grown recesses you discerned stacks of golden +maize and pumpkins; apples and plum-trees, nodding drowsily over walls, +littered the streets with snowy blossoms or fallen leaves. Commercial +life was extinct. The few remaining shopkeepers wore an air of +slumberous benevolence. The very stones suggested peace. A mellow and +aristocratic flavour clung to those pink dwellings that nestled, +world--forgotten, in a green content.... + +One of those few modern houses was the Villa Mon Repos. There was a +curious history attached to the place. It had been built about a +century ago at the orders of an eccentric French lady, a lyric poetess, +who professed to be tired of life. She had heard that somewhere on +Nepenthe was a towering precipice, unique of its kind and convenient +for suicidal purposes. She thought she would like to live near that +precipice--it might come in handy. There was nothing of the right sort +in Paris, she declared; only five-storey hotels and suchlike; the +notion of casting herself down from one of those artificial eminences +did not appeal to her high-strung temperament; she craved to die like +Sappho, her ideal. An architect was despatched, the ground purchased, +the house built and furnished. That done, she settled up her affairs in +France and established herself at Mon Repos. On the evening of her +arrival she climbed the little height at the back of her domain and +looked southward, down a sheer wall of rock eight or nine hundred feet +high, over the wrinkled ocean. It made her feel queer. Further +familiarity with the precipice did not breed contempt; her visits to +the site became rarer and rarer. She died, at a patriarchal age, in her +bed, after writing a scholarly pamphlet to prove that the tale of +Sappho's leap over her famous silvery crag was a myth, the "purest +sensationalism," a fable of the grammarians "hopelessly irreconcilable +with what we know of that great woman's character." + +This much the bishop had learnt from Mr. Keith. That gentleman liked +the Sappho story; he called it absolutely true to human nature and so +creditable to the old lady's intelligence that he would have insisted +upon paying his respects to her had she not expired a good many years +before his arrival on the island. And he, of course, got it from Eames +who, as annotator of Perrelli's ANTIQUITIES, was in the habit of +garnering old details anent private houses and so forth, and had +possessed himself, in the course of his researches, of this particular +pamphlet which he intended to reprint, together with others of its +kind, in an appendix entitled, "Contemporary Social History." + +The driving road terminated at the Old Town. Mr. Heard, descending from +his carriage, followed a pathway which had been described to him by +Denis and soon found himself at the entrance of the Villa Mon Repos. It +was an inconspicuous little place, surrounded by three or four chestnut +trees and a rose garden. A steep incline at the back of the property +ended, abruptly, in air. He concluded that the precipice must be on the +other side of that slope and that, if so, it was rather too near the +house for his taste. Mr. Heard thoroughly understood the feelings of +the French poetess. He, too, was not fond of precipices. It was as much +as he could do to look down from a church tower without growing dizzy. + +On the house-steps, beside an empty cradle, sat a shrivelled hag--a +gaunt, forbidding anatomy, with hooked nose and brown skin. Tousled +grey hair, like that of a Skye terrier, hung over her forehead, half +concealing a pair of coal-black eyes. She rose up, barred the entrance +with one claw-like hand, and scrutinized him distrustfully. + +"A Cerberus!" he thought. "This must be the old lady who understands +Hindustani. Now I wonder if she knows English?" + +She seemed to understand that language too; or perhaps his kindly face +disposed her in his favour. He was allowed to pass within. + +The house was empty. Mrs. Meadows had presumably gone out for a ramble, +taking the child with her. He sat down and waited, glancing round the +premises. It was a peaceful sort of abode, pervaded by a strong sense +of home. It appealed to the bishop, who had domestic instincts and, +despite his youth, was already a little weary of tossing about the +world. He envied his cousin's happy married life. Would such an +existence ever fall to his own lot? Although, like himself, she was +only a bird of passage on Nepenthe, she had succeeded in impressing her +personality upon those rather scantily furnished rooms and filling them +with an atmosphere of England. Heavy bowls of fresh roses were ranged +about. But what was she like, after all these years? Would she +recognize him? Had she heard of his arrival on the island? + +Mrs. Meadows failed to return. Perhaps she had met some friend of +neighbour who was keeping her to dinner together with the child. The +old woman seemed unwilling or unable to give him any information as to +her whereabouts. After waiting an hour, he scribbled a short note, left +it on the writing-table, and took his leave. The eyes of that fierce +creature followed him right out of the garden. So did the scent of +roses.... + +The afternoon was drawing to its close as Mr. Heard, in a placid, +contemplative frame of mind, once more drew nigh the pink ramparts of +the Old Town, purposing to find his way home on foot. + +He entered the most westerly of its four gateways. There were stone +seats within the structure on either side of the road, convenient for +sheltering from sun or rain. Passing under the vaulted roof he met +Count Caloveglia, that handsome soldier-like personality, who instantly +recognized him and greeted him in friendliest fashion. + +"Will you do me the pleasure of coming to my house, and allow me to +offer you a cup of tea? It is visible from here--that rounded portal, do +you see? with the fig tree leaning over the street. Only a hundred +yards. Or perhaps we can rest awhile under this archway and converse. +It is always pleasant to watch the movements of the country-folk, and +there is a peculiar charm in this evening light. Well, let us sit down +then. I observe you are interested in those people. A singular +illusion, is it not?" + +He referred to a group of men and boys who, stripped to the waist, were +bearing aloft immense masses of some argent-coloured rock. + +"You've guessed my thoughts," replied the bishop. "How on earth are +they able to support such a weight? They remind me of Atlas with the +world on his shoulders." + +"It is pumice-stone--one of the old industries of the place. They +excavate it on the hill-side yonder. Volcanic stuff. There are several +suchlike indications of subterranean fires; a hot spring, for instance, +which the people regard with a kind of superstitious awe. It is +dedicated to Saint Elias and believed to stand in mysterious sympathy +with the volcano on the mainland. You will observe too, sooner or +later, something fiery and incalculable in the temperament of the +natives. Perhaps it is due to the wine grown on these scorching slopes. +If geologists are right, we are sitting at this moment on the crater of +a volcano--" + +"Dear me! That might be rather awkward. I suppose this pumice is very +light?" + +"Light as foam. But who can believe it? The bearers move within a few +feet of us, and yet it resembles the most ponderous limestone or +granite. Then you ask yourself: How is it possible? If their burden +were what it seems to be, they would be crushed to earth instead of +striding proudly along. Admirable figures! As you say, the spectacle +takes one back into mythological times. Would you not call it a +procession of Titans, children of the Gods, storing up mountain-blocks +for some earth-convulsing battle? Your eyes deceive you. Like Thomas, +the doubting apostle, you must touch with your hands. And even then you +are not wholly convinced. To me, who knows the capacity of human bone +and muscle, these men are a daily miracle. They mock my notions of what +is permissible. How hard it is, sometimes, to trust the evidence of +one's senses! How reluctantly the mind consents to reality! The +industry is decaying," he added, "but I hope it will outlive my time." + +"Everything seems to decay up here in sober and gracious fashion. I am +delighted, Count, with your Old Town. There is an autumnal flavour +about the place. It is a poet's dream. Some philosopher might dwell +here--some sage who has grown weary of disentangling life's threads." + +Rarely did Mr. Heard use florid and sentimental language like this. The +soft light, the reposeful surroundings, the homelike influence of the +Villa Mon Repos--all had conspired to put him into an uncommonly idyllic +mood of mind. He felt disposed to linger with the kindly stranger who +seemed so much more communicative and affable than on the occasion of +those theatricals. He lit a cigarette and watched, for a while, the +flow of life through that gateway. Its passage was pierced, like the +eye of a needle, with a slender shaft of light from the westering sun. +Fine particles of dust, suspended overhead, enveloped the homeward +moving peasantry in a tender mist of gold. + +"Yes," replied the Count. "This citadel is a microcosm of what the +world might be, if men were reasonable. Not all men! A great proportion +must be good enough to remain what they are. We could not live without +those whose business it is to bring the reasonableness of the few into +its proper relief. Were it otherwise, there would be no more +reasonableness on earth, would there?" + +"And that would be a pity," observed Mr. Heard. "I was much interested, +Count, in what you said yesterday. You spoke of the Mediterranean +becoming once more the center of human activity. There is an attraction +in the idea to one who, like myself, has been brought up on the +classics and has never forgotten his spiritual debt to antiquity. But I +question whether the majority of my countrymen would be moved by such +considerations." + +The old man replied: + +"I think we need not trouble about majorities. No one can expect a +majority to be stirred by motives other than ignoble. Your English +majority, in particular, is quite unaware of its debt to us: why should +it turn eyes in our direction? But as for other Northern men, the +enlightened ones--I cannot help thinking that they will come to their +senses again one of these days. Oh yes! They will recover their sanity. +They will perceive under what artificial and cramping conditions, under +what false standards, they have been living; they will realize the +advantages of a climate where nature meets you half-way. I know little +of England, but the United States are pretty familiar to me; the two +climates, I imagine, cannot be very dissimilar. That a man should wear +himself to the bone in the acquisition of material gain is not pretty. +But what else can he do in lands adapted only for wolves and bears? +Without a degree of comfort which would be superfluous hereabouts, he +would feel humiliated. He must become strenuous if he wishes to rise +superior to his inhospitable surroundings." + +"We think a good deal of strenuousness," objected the bishop. + +"Have you not noticed that whenever anything, however fantastic, is +imposed upon men by physical forces, they straightway make a god of it? +That is why you deify strenuousness. You dare not forgo it. The Eskimo +doubtless deifies seal-blubber; he could not survive without it. Yet +nobody would be an Eskimo if he had a chance of bettering his +condition. By all means let us take life seriously. But let us be +serious about things that matter." + +"Things that matter, Count! Is it not creditable for a man to support +his wife and family in the best conditions possible?" + +"Assuredly. But chosen spirits will do this in regions where the same +results can be obtained with a smaller outlay of vital force. We have +only a certain amount of energy at our disposal. It is not seemly to +consume every ounce of it in a contest with brute nature. Man is made +for better things. Whatever fails to elevate the mind is not truly +profitable. Tell me, sir, how shall the mind be elevated if the body be +exhausted with material preoccupations? Consider the complex conditions +under which a Northern family is obliged to live. Think of the labour +expended upon that unceasing duel with the elements--the extra clothing +and footwear and mufflers and mantles, the carpets, the rugs, the +abundant and costly food required to keep the body in sound working +condition, the plumbing, the gas, the woodwork, the paintings and +repaintings, the tons of fuel, the lighting in winter, the contrivances +against frost and rain, the never-ending repairs to houses, the daily +polishings and dustings and scrubbings and those thousand other +impediments to the life of the spirit! Half of them are non-existent in +these latitudes; half the vitality expended upon them could therefore +be directed to other ends. At close of day, your Northerner is pleased +with himself. He has survived; he has even prospered. His family is +adequately housed and clothed. He feels 'presentable,' as he calls it, +in the eyes of those who share his illusions. He fancies he has +attained the aim and object of existence. He is too dazed with the +struggle to perceive how incongruous his efforts have been. What has he +done? He has sacrificed himself on the altar of a false ideal. He has +not touched the fringe of a reasonable life. He has performed certain +social and political duties--he knows nothing of the duties towards +himself. I am speaking of men from whom better things might have been +expected. As for the majority, the crowd, the herd--they do not exist, +neither here nor anywhere else. They leave a purely physiological mark +upon posterity; they propagate the species and protect their offspring. +So do foxes. It is not enough for us. Living in our lands, men would +have leisure to cultivate nobler aspects of their nature. They would be +accessible to purer aspirations, worthier delights. They would enjoy +the happiness of sages. What other happiness deserves the name? In the +Mediterranean, Mr. Heard, lies the hope of humanity." + +The bishop was thoughtful. There occurred to him various objections to +this rather fanciful argument. Still, he said nothing. He was naturally +chary of words; it was so interesting to listen to other people! And at +this particular period he was more than usually reflective and +absorbent. + +Happiness--an honourable, justifiable happiness--how was it to be +attained? Not otherwise, he used to think, than through the twofold +agency of Christianity and civilization. That was his old College +attitude. Imperceptibly his outlook had shifted since then. Something +had been stirring within him; new points of view had floated into his +ken. He was no longer so sure about things. The structure of his mind +had lost that old stability; its elements seemed to be held in +solution, ready to form new combinations. China had taught him that men +can be happy and virtuous while lacking, and even scorning the first of +these twin blessings. Then had come Africa, where his notions had been +further dislocated by those natives who derided both the one and the +other--such fine healthy animals, all the same! A candid soul, he +allowed his natural shrewdness and logic to play freely with memories +of his earlier experiences among the London poor. Those experiences now +became fraught with a new meaning. The solemn doctrines he had preached +in those days: were they really a panacea for all the ills of the +flesh? He thought upon the gaunt bodies, starved souls, and white +faces--the dirt, the squalor of it! Was that Christianity, civilization? + +The Count, pursuing some other line of thought, broke out into a kind +of Delphic rhapsody: + +"Folly of men! The wits of our people have been blunted, their habits +bestialized, their very climate and landscape ruined. The alert genius +of the Greeks is clogged by a barbaric, leaden-hued religion--the +fertile plains of Asia Minor and Spain converted into deserts! We +begin, at last, to apprehend the mischief; we know who is to blame; we +are turning the corner. Enclosed within the soft imagination of the +HOMO MEDITERRANEUS lies a kernel of hard reason. We have reached that +kernel. The Northerner's hardness is on the surface; his core, his +inner being, is apt to quaver in a state of fluid irresponsibility. Yet +there must be reasonable men everywhere; men who refuse to wear away +their faculties in a degrading effort to plunder one another, men who +are tired of hustle and strife. What, sir, would you call the +phenomenon of to-day? What is the outstanding feature of modern life? +The bankruptcy, the proven fatuity, of everything that is bound up +under the name of Western civilization. Men are perceiving, I think, +the baseness of mercantile and military ideals, the loftiness of those +older ones. They will band together, the elect of every nation, in +god-favoured regions round the Inland Sea, thee to lead serener lives. +To those how have hitherto preached indecorous maxims of conduct they +will say: 'What is all this ferocious nonsense about strenuousness? An +unbecoming fluster. And who are you, to dictate how we shall order our +day? Go! Shiver and struggle in your hyperborean dens. Trample about +those misty rain-sodden fields, and hack each other's eyes out with +antideluvian bayonets. Or career up and down the ocean, in your absurd +ships, to pick the pockets of men better than yourselves. That is you +mode of self-expression. It is not ours.' And Mediterranean people will +lead the way. They have suffered more than all from the imbecilities of +kinds and priests and soldiers and politicians. They now make an end of +this neurasthenic gadding and getting. They focus themselves anew and +regain their lost dignity. That ancient individualistic tone reasserts +itself. Man becomes a personality once more--" + +He continued for some time in this prophetic strain, the bishop +listening with considerable approbation though, at a certain point of +the discourse, he would have liked to drop a word about Thermopylae and +Marathon. He also knew something of the evils of Northern +industrialism--how it stunts the body and warps the mind. + +"What a charming dreamer!" he thought. + +It was rather convenient for the Count to be able to pass, just then, +for a dreamer. + +As a matter of fact, he was an extremely practical old gentleman. + + + + + + +CHAPTER VIII + + + + + +"Sanidin?" queried Denis almost flippantly, as he held up a fragment of +rock. + +He was not particularly eager to hear Marten's answer. He had thought, +only a few days ago, that he would like to be a geologist; Marten had +inspired him with a fancy for that science. The fit was already +passing. + +How quickly this geological mood had evaporated. How quickly everything +evaporated, nowadays. + +All was not well with Denis. Early that morning he had tried his hand +at poetry once more, after a long interval. Four words--that was all the +inspiration which had come to him. + +"Or vine-wreathed Tuscany...." + +A pretty turn, in the earlier manner of Keats. It looked well on the +snowy paper. "Or vine-wreathed Tuscany." He was content with that +phrase, so far as it went. But where was the rest of the stanza? + +How easily, a year or two ago, could he have fashioned the whole verse. +How easily everything was accomplished in those days. To be a poet: +that was a fixed point on his horizon. Any number of joyous lyrics, as +well as three plays not intended for the stage, had already dropped +from his pen. He was an extraordinary success among his college +friends; everybody liked him; he could say and do what he pleased. Was +he not the idol of a select group who admired not only one another but +also the satanism of Baudelaire, the hieratic obscenities of Beardsley, +the mustiest Persian sage, the modernest American ballad-monger? He was +full of gay irresponsibility. Ever since, on returning to his rooms +after some tedious lecture, he announced to his friends that he had +lost an umbrella but preserved, thank God, his honour, they augured a +brilliant future for him. So, for other but no less cogent reasons, did +his doting, misguided mother. + +Both were disappointed. Those sprightly sallies became rarer; epigrams +died, still-born, on his lips. He lost his sense of humour; grew +mirthless, fretful, self-conscious. He suddenly realized the existence +of a world beyond his college walls; it made him feel like a hot-house +flower exposed to the blustering winds of March. Life was no longer a +hurdle in a steeple-chase to be taken at a gallop; it was a tangle of +beastly facts that stared you in the face and refused to get out of the +way. With growing years, during vacation, he came in contact with a new +set of people; men who smiled indulgently at mention of all he held +most sacred--art, classics, literature; men who were plainly not insane +and yet took up incomprehensible professions of one kind or +another--took them up with open eyes and unfeigned zest, and actually +prospered at them in a crude worldly fashion. + +He shrank at first from their society, consoling himself with the +reflection that, being bounders, it did not matter whether they +succeeded or not. But this explanation did not hold good for long. They +were not bounders--not all of them. People not only dined with them: +they asked them to dinner. Quite decent fellows, in fact. Nothing was +wrong with them, save that they held a point of view which was at +variance with his own. + +It was a rude awakening. Every moment he was up against something new. +There were quite a lot of things, he discovered, which a fellow ought +to know, and doesn't. Too many of them to assimilate with comfort. They +crowded in upon him and unsettled his mind. He kept up a brave +exterior, but his inner core was suffering; he was no longer certain of +himself. He became easily swayed and changeful in his moods. That sure +touch in lyrics, as in daily life, was deserting him. His dreams were +not coming true. He was not going to set the Thames on fire with poetry +or anything else. He would probably be a failure. Aware of this +weakness, he looked up to what was strong. Everything was different +from himself, everything forceful, emphatic and clear-cut, exercised a +fascination upon him. He tried in an honest, groping fashion, to learn +what it was all about. That was why he had taken to Edgar Marten, the +antithesis of himself, bright but dogmatic, a slovenly little plebeian +but a man who after all had a determined, definite point of view. + +Denis repeated: + +"Sanidin?" + +"Let's have a look at it then," said Marten condescendingly, "though I +can't say I'm in a geological temper this morning. The south wind seems +to rot one's intelligence somehow. Hand it here. Sanidin be blowed! +It's specular iron. Now I wonder why you should hit upon sanidin? Why?" + +He, too, did not pause for a reply. He turned his glance once more down +the steep hill-side which they had climbed with a view to exploring +some instructive exposure of the rock. Marten intended to utilize the +site as a text for a lay sermon. Arrived on the spot they had sat down. +As if by common consent, geology was forgotten. To outward appearances +they were absorbed in the beauties of nature. Sirocco mists rose +upwards, clustering thickly overhead and rolling in billowy formations +among the dales. Sometimes a breath of wind would convulse their ranks, +causing them to trail in long silvery pennants across the sky and, +opening a rift in their gossamer texture, would reveal, far down below, +a glimmer of olives shining in the sunlight or a patch of blue sea, +framed in an aureole of peacock hues. Stones and grass were clammy with +warm moisture. + +"It's a funny thing," said Marten, after a long pause. "I've often +noticed it. When I'm not actually at work, I'm always thinking about +girls. I wish I could talk better Latin, or Italian. Not that I should +be running after them all day long. I've got other fish to fry. I've +got to catalogue my minerals, and I'm only half-way through. For the +matter of that, I haven't come across half as many nice ones here as I +thought I would." + +"Minerals?" + +"Girls. I don't seem to take to these foreigners. But there's one--" + +"Go on." + +"You're a queer fellow, Phipps. Don't you ever look at women? I believe +you have the making of a saint in you. Fight against it. A fellow can't +live without vices. Here you are, with lots of money, stewing in a back +bedroom of a second-class hotel and getting up every morning at five +o'clock because you like lying in bed late. Is that your way of +mortifying the flesh? Got a soul, eh? Get rid of it. The soul! That +unhappy word has been the refuge of empty minds ever since the world +began. You're just like a man I used to know at Newcastle. You can't +think what an ass he was. A sort of eugenical crank, who talked about +the City Beautiful where everybody would lead regenerated lives like a +flock of prize sheep. Everything sanitary and soulful; nothing but pure +men and pure women. An addle-headed theorist, he was, till a woman got +hold of him--one of the other kind, you know--and gave him something +practical to think about. That's what will happen to you, Phipps. I can +see it coming." + +"I've been analysing myself lately. I find I have too much romance in +my composition, as it is." + +"What do you call romance?" + +Denis thought awhile. Then he said: + +"When a man invests ordinary people or objects or occurrences with an +extraordinary interest. When he reads attributes into them which they +don't possess, or exaggerates those which they do possess. When he +looks at a person and can't help thinking that there is nobody on earth +quite like her." + +"Too celestial for me, on the whole. But I'm glad you said that last +part. Glad for your sake, I mean. It shows that you've perhaps got +something better than a soul, after all." + +"What is that?" + +"A body. Look here, Phipps. I also have my romantic moments, though you +wouldn't believe it. I can be as romantic as ever you please. But not +when I'm alone." + +"I should like to see you in that condition. And talking Latin, no +doubt?" he added with a laugh. + +"I daresay you would," replied the scientist. "Given the circumstances +under which I become romantic, you'll find it a little difficult. But +there's no knowing. Funny things happen sometimes!" + +Denis had picked up another stone. He scrutinized it with close +attention, and then began to turn it round and round in his hand in an +absent-minded fashion. At last he remarked: + +"We are not doing much mineralogy, are we? What do you think of +chastity, Marten?" + +"Chastity be blowed. It's an unclean state of affairs, and dangerous to +the community. You can't call yourself a good citizen till you have +learnt to despise it from the bottom of your heart. It's an insult to +the Creator and an abomination to man and beast." + +"Perhaps you never gave it a fair trial," suggested Denis. + +"Perhaps I'm not quite such a damned fool as all that. A man needn't +handle everything dirty in order to be doubly sure about it. If you +tell me that a dead donkey smells bad, I'm quite prepared to believe +you without poking my nose into it. Chastity is a dead donkey. No +beating will bring it to life again. Who killed it? The experience of +every sane man and woman on earth. It's decayed; it ought to be buried. +You ask me to give it a trial. Perhaps I will, when I'm in the same +mellow condition myself. Everything in its proper season. Don't let us +reverse the natural order of things. When we cease to practise, then is +the time to preach. A fellow of your size! And with your good looks, +too. Who knows how many golden opportunities you've missed. Try to make +up for lost time, Phipps. Get rid of conventional notions, if you value +your health." + +"I will, when I find them wrong. What do you think of women--generally +speaking, I mean?" + +Marten replied, without a moment's hesitation: + +"Thank God I'm a Jew. You must take that into consideration. I think +the Mormons have made a good shot at solving the woman question, if the +question exists at all. Mormonism is a protest against monogamy. And +please observe that it's a protest not on the part of man alone. It's a +protest on the part of woman. Never forget that. In fact, I don't +believe any woman would ever bind herself to one fool of a man if she +had her own way. She wouldn't marry at all. She needn't, nowadays. She +won't, very soon. A man who marries--well, there may be some excuse for +him, though a love-match is generally a failure and a money-match +always a mistake. The heroes, the saints and sages--they are those who +face the world alone. A married man is half a man." + +"Ahem!" + +Marten was silent. + +"I did not ask you to stop," said Denis. "You've got it very pat!" + +"Plain sailing, my boy. It's the social reformers and novelists who +create these artificial conundrums; they want to sell their rotten +literature; they want to make us forget that the only interesting and +important part of the business is what nobody talks or writes about. +What does it all amount to? Man creates intellectually and physically. +He classifies minerals or blasts out a tunnel. Woman creates +physiologically; she supplies the essential, the raw material; her +noblest product is a child. I get on splendidly with women, because we +both realize the stupidity of the average sex-twaddle. We have no +illusions about each other. We know exactly what we are after. We know +exactly how to attain it. I tell you what, Phipps, Female Emancipation +is going to do away with a lot of cant and idealism. Knock the silly +male on the head. There'll be an end of your chastity-worship, once +women are fairly started on the game. They won't put up with it." + +"Disgusting," said Denis. "Go on." + +"I'm done. What, sanidin again?" + +Denis still held the stone in his hand. He was thinking, however, of +other things. He liked to collect fresh ideas, to be impregnated with +the mentality of other people--he knew how much he had to learn. But he +would have preferred his mind to be moulded gently, in artistic +fashion. Marten's style was more like random blows from a +sledge-hammer, half of them wide of the mark. It was not very edifying, +or even instructive. Keith was the same. Why was everybody so violent, +so extreme in their views? + +Marten repeated: + +"Sanidin?" + +"It might be sanidin in places," replied Denis. "I do know a little +something about crystals, Marten. I have read Ruskin's ETHICS OF THE +DUST." + +"Ruskin. Good god! He's not a man; he's an emetic. But you never +answered my first question. You always hit upon sanidin. Why?" + +"Oh, I don't know. It's rather a pretty word, don't you think? It would +do for a Christian name. Girls' names are so terribly commonplace. They +are always Marjorie, or something. If I had a daughter, I should call +her Sanidin." + +"You're not likely to find yourself in that position at this rate. If I +had a daughter, I know perfectly well what I should call her." + +"What?" + +"Angelina." + +"You would?" asked Denis slowly. "And why?" + +"Oh, it's rather a pretty name, don't you think?" + +"Not a bad name at all, now I come to think of it. But it sounds +foreign. I thought you did not care about foreigners." + +"I don't. But there's one--" + +"Go on," said Denis. + +Mr. Marten winked. + +The mists had fled from the hilltops; rocks and vineyards, and the sea +at their foot, lay flooded in sunshine. With one accord, the two young +men rose from the ground and turned their steps homewards. The +mineralogical lesson was over. + +"Coming to Keith's to-night?" enquired Marten with a fine show of +nonchalance. + +"I don't know." + +"I would if I were you. They say he does things properly. There'll be +an awful crowd--a regular bust-up. He only gives one of these +entertainments a year. Dancing and Chinese lanterns and champagne in +torrents. Won't you go?" + +"Perhaps later in the evening." + +Denis was perturbed. He scented a rival in this brutalitarian, though +it seemed hardly possible that Angelina should take much notice of him. +Meanwhile, he felt in need of some gentlemanly and soothing influence, +after such an outpouring of vulgarity. He thought of the bibliographer. +He liked Eames; he admired that scholarly detachment. He, too, might +end in annotating some masterpiece--who knows? To be a +bibliographer--what a calm, studious life! + +"I think I'll go to Eames," he remarked. + +"Really? A colourless creature, that Eames. As dry as a stick; a +typical Don. I promised him a mineralogical map, by the way. You might +tell him I haven't forgotten, will you? I wonder what you can see in +the man?" + +"I rather like him," said Denis. "He knows what he wants." + +"That is not enough, my young friend!" replied Marten with decision. "A +fellow must want something sensible." + +"What do you call sensible?" + +"Sanidin, and things like that. Things with pretty names. Eh, Phipps?" + +Denis said nothing. + +His friend continued jovially: + +"The tavern mood is upon me. I am going to Luisella's to get a drink. +One gets sick of that Club. Besides, I've taken rather a fancy to that +younger sister. The second youngest, I mean; the one with the curly +hair--you know! I only wish I knew a bit more Latin." + +Luisella's grotto-tavern had become quite a famous rendezvous. You +could drop in there at any hour and always find company to your liking. +Don Francesco had a good deal to do with its discovery; he discovered, +at all events, the second eldest of the four orphan sisters who managed +the house. After a time, having convinced himself that they were all +good penitents and being a kindly sort of man, he thought that other +people might like to share in the seductions which the place afforded. +He took foreign friends there from time to time, and none were +disappointed. The wine was excellent. Russians, excluded from the Club +by Mr. Parker's severity, frequented the spot in considerable numbers. +They were nicely treated there. Not many nights previously one of the +Master's disciples, the athletic young Peter Krasnojabkin, who was +credited with being a protege of Madame Steynlin's, had distinguished +himself by drinking sixteen bottles at a sitting. He afterwards smashed +a few chairs and things, for which he apologized so prettily next +morning that the girls would not hear of his paying for the damage. + +"It's all in the family," they said. "Come and break some more!" + +That was the way they ran the place, as regards drinks. The quality of +the refreshments, too, was quite out of the common. As for the girls +themselves--their admirers were legion. They could have married anyone +they pleased, had it not been more in accordance with the interests of +their business, to say nothing of the personal inclinations, to have +only lovers. + +As Marten disappeared under that hospitable doorway, I flashed through +the mind of Denis that Eames was a confirmed recluse; he might not like +being disturbed in the morning. + +Besides, he was probably at work. + +He thought of going to see the bishop. There was a glamour in the name. +To be a bishop! His mother had sometimes suggested the Church, or at +least politics as a career for him, if poetry should fail. But this one +was so matter-of-fact and unpretentious in his clothing, his opinions. +A broken-down matrimonial agent, Don Francesco had called him. Mr. +Heard was not his idea of a shepherd of souls; he was only a colonial, +anyhow. A grey type of man--nothing purple about him, nothing glowing or +ornate. He did not get on particularly well with him either. + +Besides, he hardly knew him sufficiently to intrude at this hour of the +day. + +One thing was certain. He would go to the Cave of Mercury that very +evening. Keith was right. He must try to "find himself." He wanted to +be alone, to think things out. Or perhaps--no. He did not want to be +alone with his thoughts. They were too oppressive just then. He +required some kind of company. + +Besides, Keith had said "full moon." The moon was not yet quite full. + +No! + +He would see what the Duchess was doing, and perhaps stay to luncheon. +Eames could wait. So could the bishop. So could the cave. He was fond +of the Duchess. + +Besides, it was such a quaint place--that austere old convent, built by +the Good Duke Alfred. + + + + + + +CHAPTER IX + + + + + +"That is the worst of dining with a man. You have to be civil next +morning. But surely, Eames, we two need not stand on ceremony? I am +particularly anxious for you to come to-night. Can't you really manage +it? I want you to meet Malipizzo and say a few nice words to him. You +are too aloof with that man. There is nothing like keeping on the right +side of the law." + +"What do you mean by that?" + +"The right side of the judge," said Keith. "It is so easy to be +polite to people, and so advisable in some cases. How would you like +to spend a week or two in gaol? He will have you there one of these +days, unless you have placed him under some kind of obligation. He +represents justice here. I know you don't like him. But what would +it cost you--just a friendly handshake?" + +"He cannot touch me. I have nothing on my conscience." + +"Conscience, my dear fellow, is a good servant but a bad master. Your +sentiments are English. They will never do in a country where the +personal element still counts for something." + +"The personal element signifying favouritism and venality?" asked +Eames. "A pretty state of affairs!" + +"The philosopher can only live under a venal government." + +"I disagree with you altogether." + +"You always disagree with me," answered Keith. "And you always find +yourself in the wrong. You remember how I warned you about that little +affair of yours? You remember what an ass you made of yourself?" + +"What little affair?" enquired Eames, with a tinge of resignation in +his voice. + +The other did not reply. Mr. Keith could be tactful, on occasions. He +pretended to be absorbed in cutting a cigar. + +"What little affair?" insisted the bibliographer, fearful of what was +coming next. + +It came. + +"Oh, that balloon business...." + +It was not true to say of Mr. Eames that he lived on Nepenthe because +he was wanted by the London police for something that happened in +Richmond Park, that his real name was not Eames at all but Daniels--the +notorious Hodgson Daniels, you know, who was mixed up in the Lotus Club +scandal, that he was the local representative of an international gang +of white-slave traffickers who had affiliated offices in every part of +the world, that he was not a man at all but an old boarding-house +keeper who had very good reasons for assuming the male disguise, that +he was a morphinomaniac, a disfrocked Baptist minister, a pawnbroker +out of work, a fire-worshipper, a Transylvanian, a bank clerk who had +had a fall, a decayed jockey who disgraced himself at a subsequent +period in connection with some East-End mission for reforming the boys +of Bermondsey and then, after pawning his mother's jewelry, writing +anonymous threatening letters to society ladies about their husbands +and vice-versa, trying to blackmail three Cabinet Ministers and +tricking poor servant-girls out of their hard-earned wages by the sale +of sham Bibles, was luckily run to earth in Piccadilly Circus, after an +exciting chase, with a forty-pound salmon under his arm which he had +been seen to lift from the window of a Bond Street fishmonger. + +All these things, and a good many more, had been said. Eames knew it. +Kind friends had seen to that. + +To contrive such stories was a certain lady's method of asserting her +personality on the island. She seldom went into society owing to some +physical defect in her structure; she could only sit at home, like +Penelope, weaving these and other bright tapestries--odds and ends of +servants' gossip, patched together by the virulent industry of her own +disordered imagination. It consoled Mr. Eames slightly to reflect that +he was not the only resident singled out for such aspersions; that the +more harmless a man's life, the more fearsome the legends. He suffered, +none the less. This was why he seldom entered the premises of the Alpha +and Omega Club where, quite apart from his objection to Parker's poison +and the loose and rowdy talk of the place, he was liable to encounter +the lady's stepbrother. Of course he knew perfectly well what he ought +to have done. He ought to have imitated the example of other people who +behaved like scoundrels and openly gloried in it. That was the only way +to be even with her; it took the wind out of her sails. Keith often put +the matter into a nutshell: + +"The practical advantages of doing something outrageous must be clear +to you. It is the only way of stopping her mouth, unless you like to +have her poisoned, which might be rather expensive even down here, +though you may be sure I would do my best to smooth things over with +Malipizzo. But I am afraid you don't realize the advantages of +ruffianism as a mode of art, and a mode of life. Only think: a thousand +wrongs to every right! What an opening for a man of talent, especially +in a country like this, where frank and independent action still counts +its admirers. You have done nothing, of late, worthy to be recorded in +the CHRONIQUE SCANDALEUSE of Nepenthe. Twelve years ago, wasn't it, +that little affair of yours? Time is slipping by, and here you muddle +along with your old Perrelli, in a fog of moral stagnation. It is not +fair to the rest of us. We all contribute our mites to the gaiety of +nations. Bethink yourself. Bestir yourself. Man! Do something to show +us you are alive." + +To such speeches Mr. Eames would listen with a smile of amused +indignation. He was incapable of living up to the ideals of a man like +Keith whose sympathy with every form of wrong-doing would have rendered +him positively unfit for decent society but for his flagrant good +nature and good luncheons. He suffered in silence. + +He had good reason for suffering. That "little affair" of twelve years +ago was a ghost which refused to be laid. Every one on the island knew +the story; it was handed down from one batch of visitors to the next. +He knew that whenever his name was mentioned this unique indiscretion +of his, this toothsome morsel, would likewise be dished up. It would +never grow stale, though atoned for by twelve years of exemplary +conduct. He felt guilty. There was a skeleton in his cupboard. He +realized what people were saying. + +"Know Eames? Oh, yes. That quiet man, who writes. One can't swallow +half those yarns about him; quite impossible to believe, of course. She +overdoes things, the good woman. All the same, there's no smoke without +fire. You know what actually did happen, don't you? Well; one really +doesn't quite know what to make of a fellow like that, does one?" + +What had happened? + +The bibliographer had fallen in love, after the fashion of a +pure-minded, gallant gentleman. It was his first and only experience of +this kind--an all-consuming passion which did much credit to his heart +but little to his head. So deeply were his feelings involved that +during those brief months of infatuation he neglected, he despised, he +derided his idol Perrelli. He put on a new character. While the dust +was accumulating on those piles of footnotes, Mr. Eames astonished +people by becoming a society man. It was a transfiguration. He appeared +in fancy ties and spats, fluttered about at boating parties and +picnics, dined at restaurants, perpetrated one or two classic jokes +about the sirocco. Nepenthe opened its eyes wide till the truth was +made manifest. After that, everybody said he might have discovered a +worthier object for his affection than the "BALLOON CAPTIF." + +She was a native of the mainland to whose credit it must be said that +she did not pretend to be anything but what she was--an exuberant, +gluttonous dame, with volcanic eyes, heavy golden bracelets, the +soupcon of a moustache, and arms as thick as other people's thighs; an +altogether impossible person. Nobody but a man of genuine refinement, +scrupulous rectitude, delicate sense of honour and kindly disposition +would have risked being seen in the same street with such a horror; +nobody but a real gentleman could have fallen in love with her. Mr. +Eames ran after her like a dog. He made a perfect ass of himself, +heedless of what anybody though or said of him. The men declared he was +going mad--breaking up--sickening for an attack of G.P. "Miracles will +never cease," charitably observed the Duchess. Alone of all his lady +acquaintances, Madame Steynlin liked him all the better for this +gaucherie. She was a true woman-friend of all lovers; she knew the +human heart and its queer little vagaries. She received the couple with +open arms and entertained them royally, after her manner; gave them a +kind of social status. Under this friendly treatment Mr. Eames grew +thinner from day to day; he was visibly losing flesh. The dame +prospered. Piloted by the love-sick bibliographer she gradually waddled +her way--it was uphill work, for both of them--into the uppermost strata +of local society where, owing to the rarefied atmosphere, her appetite, +to say nothing of her person, soon gained notoriety. She was known, in +briefest space of time, as "the cormorant," as "prime streaky," as +"Jumbo," as "the phenomenon" and, by those who understood the French +language, as the "BALLON CAPTIF." + +The "BALLON CAPTIF." ... + +How things got about, on Nepenthe! Somehow or other, this odious +nickname reached her lover's ears. It embittered his existence to such +an extent that, long after the idyll was over, he had serious thoughts +of leaving the island and would doubtless have done so, but for his +re-kindled enthusiasm for Monsignor Perrelli. So sensitive did he +remain on this point that the mere mention of balloons, or even +aeroplanes, would make him wince and feel desirous of leaving the room; +he always thought that people introduced the subject with malicious +purpose, in order to remind him of this unforgettable peccadillo, the +"balloon business," his one lapse from perfect propriety. Mr. Keith, +who confessed to a vein of coarseness in his nature--prided himself upon +it and, in fact, cultivated insensitiveness as other people cultivate +orchids, pronouncing it to be the best method of self-protection in a +world infested with fools--Mr. Keith sometimes could not resist the +temptation of raking up the ashes surreptitiously, after an elaborate, +misleading preamble. He loved to watch his friend's meekly perplexed +face on such occasions. + +Heaven knows how long the affair might have lasted but for the fact +that a husband, or somebody, unexpectedly turned up--a husky little man +with a cast in one eye, who looked uxorious to an alarming degree. He +carried her off in the nick of time to save Mr. Eames from social +ostracism, mental dotage, and financial ruin. Her mere appearance had +made him the laughing-stock of the place; her appetite had led him into +outlays altogether incompatible with his income, chiefly in the matter +of pastries, macaroons, fondants, ices, caramels, chocolates, jam +tartlets and, above all, meringues, to which she was fabulously +destructive. + +It took some living down, that episode. He feared people would talk of +it to his dying day; he knew they would! He wished balloons had never +been invented. None the less he stuck it out bravely, threw himself +with redoubled zeal into Monsignor Perrelli and, incidentally, became +more of a recluse than ever. + +"It has been a lesson," he reflected. "SEMPER ALIQUID HAEREBIT, I am +afraid...." + +Ernest Eames was the ideal annotator. He was neither inductive nor +deductive; he had no axe to grind. His talent consisted in an ant--like +hiving faculty. He was acquisitive of information for a set purpose--to +bring the ANTIQUITIES up to date. Whatever failed to fit in with this +programme, however novel, however interesting--it was ruthlessly +discarded. In this and other matters he was the reverse of Keith, who +collected information for its own sake. Keith was a pertinacious and +omnivorous student; he sought knowledge not for a set purpose but +because nothing was without interest for him. He took all learning to +his province. He read for the pleasure of knowing what he did not know +before; his mind was unusually receptive because, he said, he respected +the laws which governed his body. Facts were his prey. He threw himself +into them with a kind of piratical ardour; took them by the throat, +wallowed in them, worried them like a terrier, and finally assimilated +them. They gave him food for what he liked best on earth: +"disinterested thought." They "formed a rich loam." He had an +encyclopaeic turn of mind; his head, as somebody once remarked, was a +lumber-room of useless information. He could tell you how many public +baths exited in Geneva in pre-Reformation days, what was the colour of +Mehemet Ali's whiskers, why the manuscript of Virgil's friend Gallius +had not been handed down to posterity, and in what year, and what +month, the decimal system was introduced into Finland. Such aimless +incursions into knowledge were a puzzle to his friends, but not to +himself. They helped him to build up a harmonious scheme of life--to +round himself off. + +He had lately attacked, in Corsair fashion, the Greek philosophers and +had disembowelled Plato, Aristotle and the rest of them, to his +complete satisfaction, in a couple of months; at present he was up to +the ears in psychology, and his talk bristled with phrases about the +"function of the real," about reactions, reflexes, adjustments and +stimuli. For all his complexity there was something so childlike in his +nature that he never realized what an infliction he was, nor how +tiresome his conversation could become to people who were not quite so +avid of "disinterested thought." Living alone and spending too much +time in unprofitable studies, his language was apt to be professionally +devoid of humour--a defect he made heroic efforts to remedy by what he +called the "Falernian system." It was the fault of his mother, he said; +she was a painfully conscientious woman. A man's worst enemies are his +parents, he would add. + +So far as was known, Mr. Keith had never written a book, a pamphlet, or +even a letter to the newspapers. He maintained a good deal of +correspondence, however, in different parts of the world, and the wiser +of those who were favoured with his epistles preserved them as literary +curiosities, under lock and key, by reason of the writer's rare faculty +of expressing the most atrocious things in correct and even admirable +English. Chaster than snow as a conversationalist, he prostituted his +mother-tongue, in letter-writing, to the vilest of uses. Friends of +long standing called him an obscene old man. When taxed with this +failing--by Mr. Eames, for instance, who shivered at what he called +PRAETEXTATA VERBA--he would hint that he could afford to pay for his +little whims, meaning, presumably, that a rich man is not to be judged +by common standards of propriety. Such language was particularly +galling to Mr. Eames, who held that the possession of wealth entails +not only privileges but obligations, and that the rich man should set +the example of purity in words and deeds, etc., etc., etc. + +They were always disagreeing, anyhow. + +"You exalt purity to a bad eminence," Keith would remark. "What did you +say about the book I lent you the other day? You said it was morbid and +indecent; you said that no clean-minded person would car to read it. +And yet, after an unnecessary amount of arguing, you were forced to +admit that the subject was interesting and that the writer dealt with +it in an interesting manner. What more can you expect from an author? +Believe me, this hankering after purity, this hypersensitiveness as to +what is morbid or immoral, is by no means a good sign. A healthy man +refuses to be hampered by preconceived notions of what is wrong or +ugly. When he reads a book like that the either yawns or laughs. That +is because he is sure of himself. I could give you a long list of +celebrated statesmen, princes, philosophers and prelates of the Church +who take pleasure, in their moments of relaxation, in what you would +call improper conversation, literature or correspondence. They feel the +strain of being continually pure; they realize that all strains are +pernicious, and that there is no action without its reaction. They +unbend. Only inveterate folks do not unbend. They dare not, because +they have no backbone. They know that if they once unbent, they could +not straighten themselves out again. They make a virtue of their own +organic defect. They explain their natural imperfection by calling +themselves pure. If you had a little money--" + +"You are always harking back to that point. What has money to do with +it?" + +"Poverty is like rain. It drops down ceaselessly, disintegrating the +finer tissues of a man, his recent, delicate adjustments, and leaving +nothing but the bleak and gaunt framework. A poor man is a wintry +tree--alive, but stripped of its shining splendour. He is always denying +himself this or that. One by one, his humane instincts, his elegant +desires, are starved away by stress of circumstances. The charming +diversity of life ceases to have any meaning for him. To console +himself, he sets up perverse canons of right and wrong. What the rich +do, that is wrong. Why? Because he does not do it. Why not? Because he +has no money. A poor man is forced into a hypocritical attitude towards +life--debarred from being intellectually honest. He cannot pay for the +necessary experience." + +"There is something in what you say," Eames would assent. "But I fear +you are overstating your case." + +"So did Demosthenes and Jesus Christ, and likewise Cicero and Julius +Caesar. Everybody overstates his case, particularly when he is anxious +to do something which he considers useful. I regard it as a real +grievance, Eames, not to be allowed to assist you financially. Having +never done a stroke of work in my life, I can talk freely about my +money. My grandfather was a pirate and slave-dealer. To my certain +knowledge, not a penny of his wealth was honestly come by. That ought +to allay your scruples about accepting it. NON OLET, you know. Let me +write you out a cheque for five hundred, there's a good fellow. Solely +as a means of smoothing over the anfractuosities of life and squeezing +all the possible pleasure out of it! What else is money made for? They +say you live on milk and salad. Why the Hell--" + +"Thanks! I have all I want; sufficient to pay for the minor pleasures +of life." + +"Such as?" + +"A clean handkerchief now and then. I see no harm in dying poor." + +"Where would I be, if my grandfather had seen no harm in it? Don't you +really believe that money sweetens all things, as Pepys says?" + +The diarist was one of Keith's favourite authors. He called him a +representative Englishman and regretted that the type was becoming +extinct. Eames would reply: + +"Your Pepys was a disgusting climber. He makes me ill with his +snobbishness and silver plate and monthly gloatings over his gains. I +wonder you can read the man. He may have been a capable official, but +he was not a gentleman." + +"Have you ever seen a gentleman, except on a tailor's fashion-plate?" + +"Yes. One, at all events; my father. However, we won't labour that +point; we have discussed it before, haven't we? Your money would +sweeten nothing for me. It would procure me neither health of body nor +peace of mind. Thanks all the same." + +Mr. Keith, true to his ancestral tenacity, was not easily put off. He +would begin again: + +"George Gissing was a scholar and a man of refinement, like yourself. +You know what he says? 'Put money in thy purse, for to lack the current +coin of the realm is to lack the privileges of humanity.' The +privileges of humanity: you understand, Eames?" + +"Does he say that? Well, I am not surprised. I have sometimes noticed +gross, unhealthy streaks in Gissing." + +"I will tell you what is unhealthy, Eames. Your own state of mind. You +derive a morbid pleasure from denying yourself the common emoluments of +life. It's a form of self-indulgence. I wish you would open your +windows and let the sun in. You are living by candlelight. If you +analysed yourself closely--" + +"I don't analyse myself closely. I call it a mistake. I try to see +soberly. I try to think logically. I try to live becomingly." + +"I am glad you don't always succeed," Keith would reply, with a +horrible accent on the word "always." "Heaven shield me from a +clean-minded man!" + +"We have touched on that subject once or twice already, have we not? +Your arguments will never entangle me, though I think I can be fair to +them. Money enables you to multiply your sensations--to travel about, +and so forth. In doing so, you multiply your personality, as it were; +you lengthen your days, figuratively speaking; you come in contact with +more diversified aspects of life than a person of my limited means can +afford to do. The body, you say, is a subtle instrument to be played +upon in every variety of manner and rendered above all things as +sensitive as possible to pleasurable impressions. In fact, you want to +be a kind of Aeolian harp. I admit that this is more than a string of +sophisms; you may call it a philosophy of life. But it is not my +philosophy. It does not appeal to me in the least. You will get no +satisfaction out of me, Keith, with your hedonism. You are up against a +brick wall. You speak of my deliberately closing up avenues of +pleasure. They ought to be closed up, I say, if a man is to respect +himself. I do not call my body a subtle instrument; I call it a damned +nuisance. I don't want to be an Aeolian harp. I don't want my sensations +multiplied; I don't want my personality extended; I don't want my +outlook widened; I don't want money; I don't want aspects of life. I'm +positive, I'm literal. I know exactly what I want. I want to concern +myself with what lies under my hand. I want to be allowed to get on +with my work. I want to bring old Perrelli up to date." + +"My dear fellow! We all love you for that. And I am delighted to think +you are not really clean-minded, in spite of all these lofty +protestations. Because you aren't, are you?" + +If, after such discourse, the bibliographer still remained mulishly +clean-minded, Keith would return to the psychological necessity of +"appropriate reaction" and cite an endless list of sovereigns, popes, +and other heroes who, in their moments of leisure, were wise enough to +react against the persistent strain of purity. Then, via Alexander of +Macedon, "one of the greatest sons of earth," as Bishop Thirlwall had +called him--Alexander, with whose deplorable capacity for "unbending" a +scholar like Eames was perfectly familiar--he would switch the +conversation into realms of military science, and begin to expatiate +upon the wonderful advance which has been made since those days in the +arts of defensive and offensive warfare--the decline of the phalanx, the +rise of artillery, the changed system of fortifications, those modern +inventions in the department of land defences, sea defences and, above +all, aerial defences, parachutes, hydroplanes.... + +Whereupon a curious change would creep over the bibliographer's honest +face. He knew what this talk portended. His features would assume an +air of strained but polite attention, and he generally broke off the +conversation and took his departure at the earliest moment consistent +with ordinary civility. On such occasions he was wont to think his +friend Keith an offensive cad. Sadly shaking his head, he would say to +himself: + +"NIHIL QUOD TETIGIT NON INQUINAVIT." + + + + + + +CHAPTER X + + + + + +Mr. Keith was apt to be a bore, but he could do things properly when he +wanted, as for example on the occasion of his annual bean-feast. There +were no two opinions about that. The trees, arbours, and winding ways +of his garden were festooned that evening with hundreds of Chinese +lamps whose multi-coloured light mingled pleasantly with the purer +radiance of the moon, shining directly overhead. It was like fairyland, +the Duchess was wont to declare, year after year. And Don Francesco +who, on this particular night, clung closely to her skirts in view of +that impending conversion to the Roman Church, replied laughingly: + +"If fairyland is anything like this, I would not object to living +there. Provided always, dear lady, that you are to be found somewhere +on the premises. What do you say, Mr. Heard?" + +"I will gladly join your party, if you will allow me," replied the +bishop. "This aspic could not be better. It seems to open up a new +world of delights. Dear me. I fear I am becoming a gourmand, like +Lucullus. Though Lucullus, to be sure, was a temperate man. No, thank +you, Don Francesco; not a drop more! My liver, you know. I declare it's +making me feel quite dizzy." + +As Marten had foretold, the wine flowed in torrents. There was a +bewildering display of cool dishes, too, prepared under the personal +supervision of the chef--that celebrated artist whom Keith had inveigled +out of the service of a life-loving old Ambassador by the threat of +disclosing to the police some hideously disreputable action in the +man's past life which His Excellently had artlessly confided to him, +under the seal of secrecy. + +Mr. Samuel, a commercial gentleman who had got stuck somehow or other +at the Alpha and Omega Club, cast a practised eye over the wines, +chaud-froids, fruits, salads, ices, the lanterns and other joys of the +evening and announced, after a rough computation, that Keith's outlay +for that little show must have run well into three figures. Mr. White +agreed, adding that it did one good to get a mouthful of drinkable fizz +after Parker's poison. + +"Ah, but you ought to try the punch." + +"Come on then," said White. + +They moved away and soon stumbled upon a cluster of bibulous mortals in +their element. Miss Wilberforce was there. She liked to linger near the +fountain-head; the fountain-head, on this occasion, being a cyclopean +bowl of iced punch. The lady was in grand condition; festive, playful, +positively flirtatious. She nibbled, between her libations, at a +savoury biscuit (she hated solid food, as a rule) in order, she said, +to staunch her thirst; she told everybody that it was her birthday. +Yes, her birthday! In fact, she was quite a different creature from the +bashful visitor at the Duchess's entertainment; she was hardly shy at +all. + +"Punch and moonlight!" she was saying. "It's all as right as +rain--birthday or no birthday." + +Miss Wilberforce had about forty birthdays in the year, each of them +due to be worthily celebrated like this one. + +It was a sad and scandalous business. Better things might have been +expected of her. She was so obviously a lady. She had been so nicely +brought up. While there was still an English Church on the island, she +never failed to attend Divine Service, despite her Sunday headache. She +was often the only member of the congregation--she and Mr. Freddy +Parker, whose official dignity and English origin, however questionable +his Christianity, constrained him to put in an appearance. Mortal +enemies, they used to sit on opposite pews, glaring across the vacant +building to see if they could catch each other asleep, responding at +irregular intervals out of sheer cussedness, and trying vainly to feel +more charitable during those moments when the scraggy young +curate--generally some social failure who raked together a few pounds +from these hazardous continental engagements--recited the Gospel +according to Saint John. Those days were over. She was definitely on +the downward grade. Three members of the Club and two Russian apostles +were even then engaged in tossing up who should have the privilege of +seeing her home. The lot fell to Mr. Richards, the excellent +Vice-President, an elderly gentleman whose carefully parted hair and +flowing beard made him the very picture of respectability. To look at +him, one would have said that the dear lady could not be in better +hands. + +Mr. Keith was a perfect host. He had the right word for everybody; his +infectious conviviality made them all straightway at their ease. The +overdressed native ladies, the priests and officials moving about in +prim little circles, were charmed with his affable manner "so different +from most Englishmen"; likewise that flock of gleeful tourists who had +suddenly turned up, craving for admission without a single letter of +introduction between them, and were forthwith welcomed on the strength +of the fact that one of their party had been to Easter Island. Even the +PARROCO could not help laughing as Keith, with irresistible good +nature, seized him by the arm and thrust a MARRON GLACE between his +lips. An ideal host! The "Falernian system" was in abeyance that day. +It was the one evening in the year when, in the interests of his +guests, he could be relied upon to remain absolutely sober to the last +moment; a state of affairs which doubtless had its drawbacks, seeing +that it made him, in longer conversational efforts, rather more +abstruse and unintelligible than usual--"blind sober," as Don Francesco +once said. Even sobriety was forgiven him. He took the precaution, of +course, to keep the house locked and to replace his ordinary services +of plate by Elkington; people being pardonably fond of carrying away +memories of so enjoyable an evening. Bottles, plates, and glasses were +smashed by the dozen. He liked to see them smashed. It proved that +everybody was having a good time. + +A person unacquainted with Keith's nature could never have guessed what +a sacrifice this entertainment was to him. He was an egoist, a +solitary, in his pleasures; he used to contend that no garden on earth, +however spacious, was large enough for more than one man. And this +little Nepenthe domain, though he saw it for only a few weeks in the +year, was the apple of his eye. He guarded it jealously, troubled at +the thought that its chaste recesses might be profaned, if but for one +day, by the presence of a motley assemblage of nonentities. But a man +of his income is expected to do something to amuse his +fellow-creatures. One owes certain duties to society. Hence this +gathering, which had become a regular feature in the spring calendar of +the island. Having once decided on the step, he did not propose to be +bound by conventionalities which were the poison of rational human +intercourse. Unlike the Duchess and Mr. Parker, he refused to draw the +line at Russians; the Club, too, was represented by some of its most +characteristic members. He often descanted on the social intolerance of +men, their lack of graciousness and generous instincts; he would have +made room for the Devil himself--at all events in his "outer circle." +Such being the case, it stands to reason that he did not draw the line +at freethinkers. It was sometimes rather hard to know where he did draw +the line. + +The red-haired judge, with straw hat and Mephistophelean limp, was +there, looking like an Offenbach villain out for a spree. After being +effusively greeted by the host--they understood one another +perfectly--and forced to eat a quantity of some pink-looking stuff which +he could not resist although knowing it would disagree with him, His +Worship, left to his own devices, hobbled along in pursuit of his new +friend Muhlen. He found him, and was soon relating succulent anecdotes +of his summer holidays--anecdotes, all about women, which Muhlen tried +to cap with experiences of his own. The judge always went to the same +place--Salsomaggiore, a thermal station whose waters were good for his +sore legs. He described to Muhlen how, in jaunty clothes and shining +shoes, he pottered about its trim gardens, ogling the ladies who always +ogled back; it was the best fun in the world, and sometimes--! Mr. +Malipizzo, for all his incredible repulsiveness, posed as an ardent and +successful lover of women. No doubt it cost money. But he was never at +a loss for that commodity; he had other sources of revenue, he hinted, +besides his wretched official salary. + +Wandering along arm in arm, they passed various contingents of the +Russians, male and female, whose scarlet blouses shone brightly under +the variegated globes of light. These exotics were happy as children, +full of fun and laughter; none more so than the young giant +Krasnojabkin, whose name had been coupled by scandalmongers with that +of Madame Steynlin. An admiring audience had gathered around him while +he performed a frenzied cancan in an open moonlit space; he always +danced when he had enough to drink. The judge looked on with envy. It +sickened him to realize that those far-famed luncheons and dinners of +Madame Steynlin were being devoured by a savage like this. And the +money he doubtless extracted from her! Presently a loud guffaw from +some bosky thicket announced that the friends had been joined by the +Financial Commissioner for Nicaragua. The Trinity was complete. They +were always together, those three, playing cards at the Club or sipping +lemonade and vermouth on the terrace. + +"Oh, Mr. Keith," said the Duchess in her sweetest accents, "do you know +of what this entertainment makes me think?" + +"Shall I guess?" + +"Nothing of the kind! It makes me think that it is very, very wrong of +a man like you to be a bachelor. You want a wife." + +"To want a wife, Duchess, is better than to need one. Especially if it +happens to be only your neighbour's." + +"I am sure that means something dreadful!" + +Don Francesco broke in: + +"Tell me, Keith, how about your wives? What have you done with them? Is +it true that you sold them at various Oriental ports?" + +"They got mislaid somehow. All that was before my Great Renunciation." + +"Is it true that you kept them locked up in different parts of London?" + +"I made it a rule never to introduce my lady-friends to one another. +They are so fond of comparing notes. Novelists try to make us believe +that women delight in men's society. Rubbish! They prefer that of their +own sex. But please didn't refer to the same painful period of my +life." + +The priest insisted: + +"Is it true that you gave the plumpest of them to the Sultan of +Colambang in exchange for the recipe of some wonderful sauce? Is it +true that you used to be known as the Lightning Lover? Is it true that +you used to say, in your London days, that no season was complete +without a ruined home?" + +"She exaggerates a good deal, that lady." + +"Is it true that you once got so drunk that you mistook one of those +red-coated Chelsea pensioners for a pillar-box and tried to post a +letter in his stomach?" + +"I'm very short-sighted, Don Francesco. Besides, all that was in a +previous incarnation. Do come and listen to the music! May I offer you +my arm, Duchess? I have a surprise for you." + +"You have a surprise for us every year, you bad man," she said. "Now do +try and see if you can't get married. It makes one feel so good." + +Keith had a peculiar habit of vanishing for a day or two to the +mainland, and returning with some rare orchid from the hills, a piece +of Greek statuary, a new gardener, or something. Sowing his wild oats, +he called it. During this last visit he had come across the tracks of +an almost extinct tribe of gipsies that roamed up and down the glens of +those mysterious mountains whose purple summits were visible, on clear +days, from his own windows. After complex and costly negotiations they +had allowed themselves to be embarked, for this one night only, in a +capacious sailing boat to Nepenthe, in order to pleasure Mr. Keith's +guests. And here they sat, huddled together in dignified repose and +abashed, as it seemed, by the strangeness of their surroundings; a +bizarre group stained to an almost negro tint by exposure to sun and +winds and rain. + +Here they sat--gnarled old men and sinewy fathers of families, with +streaming black hair, golden earrings, hooded cloaks of wood and +sandals bound with leathern thongs. Mothers were there, shapeless +bundles of rags, nursing infants at the breast. The girls were draped +in gaudy hues, and ablaze with metal charms and ornaments on forehead +and arms and ankles. They showed their flashing teeth and smiled from +time to time in frank wonder, whereas the boys, superbly savage, like +young panthers caught in a trap, kept their eyes downcast or threw +distrustful, defiant glances round them. Here they sat in silence, +smoking tobacco and taking deep draughts out of a pitcher of milk which +was handed round from one to the other. Occasionally the older people +would pick up their instruments--bagpipes of sheepskin, small drums and +gourd-like mandolines--and draw from them strange dronings, gurglings, +thrummings, twangings; soon a group of youngsters would rise gravely +from the ground and, without any preconcerted signal, begin to move in +a dance--a formal and intricate measure, such as had never yet been +witnessed on Nepenthe. + +Something inhuman and yet troublingly personal lay in the performance; +it invaded the onlookers with a sense of disquietude. There was +primeval ecstasy in those strains and gestures. Giant moths, meanwhile, +fluttered overhead, rattling their frail wings against the framework of +the paper lanterns; the south wind passed through the garden like the +breath of a friend, bearing the aromatic burden of a thousand +night-blooming shrubs and flowers. Young people, meeting here, would +greet one another shyly, with unfamiliar ceremoniousness, and then, +after listening awhile to the music and exchanging a few awkward +phrases, wander away as if by common consent--further away from this +crowd and garish brilliance, far away, into some fragrant cell, where +the light was dim. + +"What do you make of it?" asked Keith of Madame Steynlin, who was +listening intently. "Is this music? If so, I begin to understand its +laws. They are physical. I seem to feel the effect of it in the lower +part of my chest. Perhaps that is the region which musical people call +their ear. Tell me, Madame Steynlin, what is music?" + +"That's a puzzle," said the bishop, greatly interested. + +"How can I explain it to you? It is so complicated, and you have so +many guests this evening. You are coming to my picnic after the +festival of Saint Eulalia? Yes? Well, I will try to explain it +then"--and her eye turned, with a kind of maternal solicitude, down the +pathway to where, in that patch of bright moonshine, her young friend +Krasnojabkin, gloriously indifferent to gipsies and everything else, +was astounding people by the audacity of his terpsichorean antics. + +"Let that be a promise," Keith replied. "Ah, Count Caloveglia! How good +of you to come. I would not have asked you to such a worldly function +had I not thought that this dancing might interest you." + +"It does, it does!" said the old aristocrat, thoughtfully sipping +champagne out of an enormous goblet which he carried in his hand. "It +makes me dream of that East which it has never been my fortune, alas, +to behold. What a flawless group! There is something archaic, Oriental, +in their attitudes; they seem to be fraught with all the mystery, the +sadness, of life that is past--of things remote from ourselves." + +"My gipsies," said Keith, "are not everybody's gipsies." + +"I think they despise us! And this austere regularity in the steps of +the dancers, this vibrating accompaniment that dwells persistently on +one note--how primitive, how scornfully unintellectual! It is like a +passionate lover knocking to gain an entrance into our hearts. And he +succeeds. He breaks down the barrier by the oldest and best of lovers' +expedients--sheer reiteration of monotony. A lover who reasons is no +lover." + +"How true that is," remarked Madame Steynlin. + +"Sheer monotony," repeated the Count. "And it is the same with their +pictorial art. We blame the Orientals for their chill cult of geometric +designs, their purely stylistic decoration, their endless repetitions, +as opposed to our variety and love of floral, human, or other +naturalistic motives. But by this simple means they attain their end--a +direct appeal. Their art, like their music, goes straight to the +senses; it is not deflected or disturbed by any intervening medium. +Colour plays its part; the sombre, throbbing sounds of these +instruments--the glowing tints of their carpets and tapestries. Talking +of gipsies, do you know whether our friend van Koppen has arrived?" + +"Koppen? A very up-to-date nomad, who takes the whole world for his +camping-ground. No, not yet. But he'll turn up in a day or two." + +Count Caloveglia was concerned, just then, about Mr. van Koppen. He had +a little business to transact with him--he fervently hoped that the +millionaire would not forgo his annual visit to Nepenthe. + +"I shall be glad to meet him again," he remarked carelessly. Then +looking up he saw Denis, who moved under the trees alone. Observing +that he seemed rather disconsolate, he walked up to him and said in a +fatherly tone: "Will you confer a favour, Mr. Denis, on an old man who +lives much alone? Will you come and see me, as you promised? My +daughter is away just now and will not be back till midsummer. I wish +you could have met her. Meanwhile, I am a little solitary. I have also +a few antiquities that might interest you." + +While Denis, slightly embarrassed, was uttering some appropriate words, +the bishop suddenly asked: + +"Where is Mrs. Meadows? Wasn't she coming down to-night?" + +"Of course she was," said Keith. "Isn't she here? What can this mean? +Your cousin is a particular friend of mine, Heard, though I have not +seen her for the last six days or so. Something must be wrong. That +baby, I expect." + +"I missed her once already," said Heard. "I'll write and make an +appointment, or go up again. By the way, Count--you remember our +conversation? Wel, I have thought of an insuperable objection to your +Mediterranean theory. The sirocco. You will never change the sirocco. +The Elect of the Earth will never endure it all their lives." + +"I think we can change the sirocco," replied the Count, meditatively. +"We can tame it, at all events. I do not know much about its history; +you must ask Mr. Eames--" + +"Who is at home," interrupted Keith, "closeted with his Perrelli." + +"What has been, may be," continued the old man, oracularly. "I question +whether the sirocco was as obnoxious in olden days as now, otherwise +the ancients, who had absurdly sensitive skins, would have complained +of it more frequently. The deforestation of Northern Africa, I suspect, +has much to do with it. Frenchmen are now trying to revive those +prosperous conditions which Mohammedanism has destroyed. Oh, yes! I +don't despair of muzzling the sirocco, even as we are muzzling that +often Mediterranean pest, the malaria." + +Keith observed: + +"Petronius, I remember, speaks of the North wind being the mistress of +the Tyrrhenian. He would not use such language nowadays, unless +alluding to its violence rather than its prevalence. Once I thought of +translating Petronius. But I discovered certain passages in the book +which are almost improper. I don't think the public ought to be put +into possession of such stuff. I am rather sorry; I like Petronius--the +poetical fragments, I mean; they make me regret that I was not born +under the Roman Empire. People are leaving," he added. "I have said +good-bye to about fifty. I shall be able to get a drink soon." + +"So you were born out of time and out of place, like many of us," +laughed the Bishop. + +Count Caloveglia said: + +"It is an academic problem, and therefore a problem which does not +exist for me, and therefore a problem dear to your own metaphysical +heart, to enquire whether a man is ever born at an inopportune moment. +We use the phrase. If we took thought we would discard it. For what is +the truth of the matter? The truth is that a man, of whom we say this, +is born at exactly the right moment; that those with whose customs and +aspirations he seems to be in discord have urgent need of him at that +particular time. No great man is ever born too soon or too late. When +we say that the time is not ripe for this or that celebrity, we confess +by implication that this very man, and no other, is required. Was +Giordano Bruno, or Edgar Poe, born out of time? Surely no generation +needed them more imperiously than their own. Only fools are born out of +time. And yet--no; not even they. For where should we be without them?" + +He smiles suavely, as though some pleasant thought was passing through +his mind. + +"At any rate a good many people die too soon or too late," said Mr. +Edgar Marten who, after doing full justice to the food and drinks, had +suddenly appeared on the scene. "Often too late," he added. + +Keith, despite his professions of sanity and reason, had an +inexplicable, invincible horror of death; he quailed at the mere +mention of the black phantom. The subject being not at all to his +taste, he promptly remarked: + +"The scholar Grosseteste was unquestionably born too soon. And I know +one man who is born too late. Who? Yourself, Count. You were made for +the Periclean epoch." + +"Thank you," said that gentleman with a gracious wave of his hand. "But +forgive me for disagreeing with you. Had I lived in that age, I should +be lacking in reverence for what it accomplished. I should be too near +to its life; unable, as you say, to see the forest for the trees. I +should be like Thucydides, a most sensible person who, if I recollect +aright, barely mentions Ictinus and the rest of them. How came it +about? This admirable writer imagined they were building a temple for +Greece; he lacked the interval of centuries which has allowed mankind +to see their work in its true perspective. He possessed traditional +moral standards whereby to judge the actions of historical +contemporaries; he could praise or blame his politicians with a good +conscience. For the Parthenon creators he had no sure norm. The +standards were not yet evolved. Pheidias was a talented +fellow-citizen--a hewer in stone by profession: what could he know of +the relations of Pheidias to posterity? Great things can only be seen +at a proper distance. Pheidias, to him, may have been little more than +an amateur, struggling with brute material in the infancy of his trade +or calling. No, my friend! I am glad not to be coeval with Pericles. I +am glad to recognize Hellenic achievements at their true worth. I am +glad to profit by that wedge of time which has enabled me to reverence +things fair and eternal." + +"Things fair and eternal," echoed Keith, who was getting too thirsty +and restless to discuss art-matters. "Come with me! I will show you +things fair and eternal." + +He led the way to a distant arbour, overhung with a canopy of blood-red +passion-flowers and girt about by design dangled from the clustering +foliage in its roof. Within, directly under the beams, all by itself, +on an upright chair beside a small table, sat an incongruous, +startling, awe-inspiring apparition--a grimy old man of Mongolian +aspect. He might have been frozen to stone, so immobile, so lifeless +were his features. Belated visitors passed near the entrance of the +shrine, peered within as at some outlandish and sinister freak of +nature, and moved on with jocular words. Nobody ventured to overstep +the threshold, whether from religious fear or because of something +repellent, something almost putrescent, which radiated from his person. +A contingent of Little White Cows, a kind of bodyguard, stood at a +respectful distance beyond, intent upon his every movement. The Master +never stirred. He sat there to be looked at--accustomed to homage almost +divine; beatifically inane. Like the Christians of old, he wore no hat. +The head was nearly bald. A long cloak, glistening with grease stains, +swathed his limbs and portly belly, on which one suspected +multitudinous wrinkles of fat. Two filmy lidless eyes, bulging on a +level with his forehead, stared into vacuity; his snub nose grew out of +a flattened face whose pallor was accentuated by the reflection of the +glittering leaves--it looked faded and sodden, like blotting-paper that +has been left out all night in the rain. Sporadic greenish-grey hairs +were scattered about his chin. The mouth was agape. + +On Mr. Keith's appearance he made no sign of recognition. Presently, +however, his lips seemed to get out of control. They moved; they began +to chatter and to mumble, in childish fashion, the inarticulate +yearnings of eld. Keith said, as though displaying some museum +curiosity: + +"Mine is the only house on Nepenthe which the Master still deigns to +enter. I'm afraid he has grown very groggy on his pins of late; if he +sat on any by a straight-backed chair they would never get him up +again. To think that was once a pretty little boy.... Poor old +fellow! I know what he wants. They've been neglecting him, those young +idiots." + +He departed, and soon returned with a tumbler full of raw whisky which +he placed on the table within reach of the arm. A flaccid, +unwholesome-looking hand was raised slowly, in a kind of deprecatory +gesture; then allowed to fall again upon the belly where it lay, with +the five fingers, round and chalky-white, extended like the rays of a +starfish. Nothing more happened. + +"We must go away for a while," said Keith, "or else he won't touch it. +He does not object to alcohol, you know. Whisky has not come out of a +warm-blooded beast. But it's going into one. A kind of Asiatic +Socrates, don't you think?" + +"A Buddha," suggested the Count. "A Buddha in second-rate alabaster. A +Chinese Buddha of a bad, realistic period." + +"It's odd," remarked Mr. Heard. "He reminds me of a dead fish. +Something ancient and fishlike--it's that mouth--" + +"He's a beauty!" interrupted Edgar Marten, sniffing with disgust. "Eyes +like a boiled haddock. And that thing has the cheek to call itself a +Messiah. Thank God I'm a Jew; it's not business of mine. But if I were +a Christian, I'd bash his blooming head in. Damned if I wouldn't. The +frowsy, fetid, flow-blown fraud. Or what's the matter with the Dog's +Home?" + +"Come, come," said Mr. Heard, who had taken rather a liking to this +violent youngster and was feeling more than usually indulgent that +evening. "Come! He can't help his face, I fancy. Have you no room in +your heart for an original? And don't you think--quite apart from +questions of religion--that we tourists ought to be grateful to these +people for diversifying the landscape with their picturesque red +blouses and things?" + +"I have no eye for landscape, Mr. Heard, save in so far as it indicates +strata and faults and other geological points. The picturesque don't +interest me. I am full of Old Testamentary strains; I can't help +looking at men from the ethical point of view. And what have people's +clothes to do with their religion? He can't help his face, you say. +Well, if he can't help that greasy old mackintosh, I'll eat my hat. +Can't a fellow be a Messiah without sporting a pink shirt or fancy +dressing-gown or blue pyjamas or something? But there you are! I defy +you to name me a single-barrelled crank. If a man is a religious +lunatic, or a vegetarian, he is sure to be touched in some other +department as well; he will be an anti-vivisectionist, a nutfooder, +costume-maniac, stamp-collector, or a spiritualist into the bargain. +Haven't you ever noticed that? And isn't he dirty? Where is the +connection between piety and dirt? I suggest they are both relapses +into ancestral channels and the one drags the other along with it. When +I see a thing like this, I want to hew it in pieces. Agag, Mr. Heard; +Agag. I must have another look at this specimen; one does not see such +a sight every day. He is a living fossil--post-pleistocene." + +He drew off; Keith and the Count, engaged in some deep conversation, +had also moved a few paces away. + +Mr. Heard stood alone, his back turned to the Master. Moonlight still +flooded the earth, the lanterns were flickering and sputtering. Some +had gone out, leaving gaps of darkness in the lighted walls. Many of +the guests retired without bidding farewell to their host; he liked +them to feel at their ease, to take "French leave" whenever so +disposed--to depart "A L'ANGLAISE," as the French say. The garden was +nearly empty. A great quietude had fallen upon its path and thickets. +From afar resounded the boisterous chorus of a party of revellers loth +to quit the scene; it was suddenly broken by a terrific crash and +bursts of laughter. Some table had been knocked over. + +Standing there, the bishop could not but listen to Keith, who had +raised his voice in emphasis and was saying to the Count, in his best +Keithean manner: + +"I am just coming to that point. A spring-board is what humanity needs. +What better one can be contrived than this pure unadulterated +Byzantianism. Cretinism, I call it. Look at the Orthodox Church. A +repository of apocalyptic nonsense such as no sane man can take +seriously. Nonsense of the right kind, the uncompromising kind. That is +my point. The paralysing, sterilizing cult of these people offers a far +better spring-board into a clean element of thought than our English +Church, whose DEMI-VIERGE concessions to common sense afford seductive +resting-places to the intellectually weak-knee'd. Do I make myself +clear? I'm getting infernally thirsty." + +"I quite agree with you, my friend. The Russians have got a better +spring-board than the English. The queer thing is, that the Russians +won't jump, whereas the Englishman often does. Well, well! We cannot +live without fools." + +Mr. Heard was slightly perturbed by these words. A good fellow like +Keith! "DEMI-VIERGE concessions to common sense"; what did he mean by +that? Did his church really make such concessions? + +"I'll think about it to-morrow," he decided. + +The Master, when they returned to him, had not budged from his +resting-place. The fingers still lay, starfish-wise, upon the folds of +that soiled homespun; his eyes still stared out of the leafy bower; his +face still wore its mask of placid imbecility. + +The glass was empty. + +Slowly, as on a pivot, his head turned in the direction of the +bodyguard. + +Forthwith some favourite disciple--not Krasnojabkin, who happened to be +escorting Madame Steynlin to her villa just then--darted to his side; +with the help of two lady-apostles known, respectively, as the +"goldfinch" and the "red apple," they conveyed him out of that shelter +into the deserted, moonlit garden. He leaned heavily on the arm of the +youth; peevish sounds, quasi-human, proceeded from his colourless lips. +And now he was almost speaking; desirous, it seemed, of formulating +some truth too deep for human utterance. + +"I bet I know what he is saying," whispered Keith. "It's something +about the Man-God." + + + + + + +CHAPTER XI + + + + + +The Russian Government is notoriously tender-hearted. But even the worm +will turn.... + +Scholars who have treated the life of the ex-monk Bazhakuloff divide it +into five clearly marked periods: the probationary, dialectical, +political, illumined and expiatory. + +The first began in youth when, being driven from his father's house by +reason of his vagrant habits and other incorrigible vices, he entered a +monastery near Kasan. Despite occasional lapses prompted by the hot +blood of his years and punished with harsh disciplinary measures, he +seems to have performed his monkish duties with sufficient zeal. It was +observed, however, that with increasing years he became unduly +interested in questions of dogma. He talked too freely; he was always +arguing. Being unable to read or write, he developed an astonishing +memory for things he had heard and faces he had seen; he brought them +up at inconvenient moments. He grew factious, obstreperous, declaring +that there was much in the constitution of the Holy Russian Church +which ought to be amended and brought up to date. What people wanted, +he said, was a New Jerusalem. A violent altercation with his Superior +touching the attributes of the Holy Ghost ended in a broken jaw-bone on +the part of the older man, and the expulsion of the younger. The +dialectical period had set in. The convent inmates, on the whole, were +glad to see the last of him--particularly the Father Superior. + +We next find him living in a large barn about fifteen miles from +Moscow. The Superior being unwilling to publish the true facts of the +broken jaw-bone, a certain fame, the fame of an earnest but +misunderstood religious innovator, had preceded him. Adherents, barely +twenty at first, gathered to his side. These disciples, humble +analphabetics like himself, have left us no word of what passed at +those long discussions. Certain it is that he now began to formulate +the rules of his Revised Church. They were to live on charity, to go +bare-headed, and to wear red blouses--like the Christians of old. The +charm of these simple regulations spread abroad, and gained him fresh +recruits. There were now some cultured folk among them, who collected +his saying into the GOLDEN BOOK. He decided to limit his disciples to +the "Sacred Number 63," and to call them "Little White Cows." Asked why +he chose this title, he answered that cows were pure and useful animals +without which humanity could not live; even so were his disciples. The +innate good sense of this speech increased his reputation. About this +time, too, he would sometimes prophesy, and undergo long periods of +motionless self-abstraction. At the end of one of these latter, after +tasting no food or drink for three and a half hours, he gave utterance +to what was afterwards known as the First Revelation. It ran to this +effect: "The Man-God is the Man-God, and not the God-Man." Asked how he +arrived at so stupendous an aphorism, he answered that it just came to +him. There were troubles in the neighbourhood over the audacity of this +utterance; some called it a divine inspiration, to the majority it was +known as the Unnamable Heresy. For a brief while the town was formed +into two camps, and the Chief of Police, a prudent official, was at his +wit's end what to do with these inflammable elements, seeing that the +ex-monk's followers had now swelled to several hundreds and contained +not a few of the more influential aristocrats of the city. In this +dilemma, he applied for instruction to the Procurator of the Holy +Synod. That gentleman, having considered the case, rashly decided that +a visionary of this stamp might be useful for furthering certain +projects of his own. He hoped, by placing under an obligation, to +fashion out of the young reformer an amenable instrument--a +miscalculation which he lived (though not for long) to repent. Under +the Procurator's aegis, Bazhakuloff was summoned to the Capital. The +political period was beginning. Moscow, on the whole, was glad to see +the last of him--particularly the Chief of Police. + +There began the most brilliant epoch of his life. By steps which it is +needless to trace, he fought and wormed his way into the favour of the +Court. A good deal of his worldly success may well have been due, as +his enemies assert, to an incredible mixture of cringing, astuteness, +and impudence. It stands to reason, however, that a man of this type +must have possessed sterling qualities of his own to be found +occupying--all this was years and years ago--a suite of apartments in the +Palace, where he lived in splendour, a Power behind the Throne, the +Confidental Adviser of the Highest Circles. His monkish garb was soon +encrusted with orders and decorations, no State function was complete +without his presence, no official appointment, from the highest and +lowest sphere of government, was held to be valid without his sanction. +Red blouses, one of several keys to his favour, could be counted by +thousands. He crushed opposition with an iron hand. He wrought a +miracle or two; but what chiefly accounted for the almost divine +veneration in which he was held was a succession of lucky +prophecies--none luckier than that wherein, during one of his moments of +inspired self-abstraction, he foretold the early and violent death of +the former protector, the man to whom he owed this rise to the +pinnacles of fame. For even so it fell out. Not many days later the +Procurator of the Holy Synod was found murdered in bed by an unknown +hand. A certain journalist, writing from Switzerland, boldly states +that the Procurator was murdered at the instigation of Bazhakuloff and +claims to have heard, from an eye-witness whom he does not name, of a +bitter quarrel between the two on the subject of a certain lady as to +whose identity we are also left in doubt. It may be true; such things +have happened ere now. This particular writer's credibility, however, +is none of the best; he has been convicted over and over again of +forcing the note in his diatribes against what he calls "retrogression +into idolatry." There was certainly a good deal of unrest in the +country during the period of the ex-monk's ascendency; no less than +13,783 persons had been banished to Siberia, and 3,756 executed at his +orders. Yet nothing, it seemed, could shatter his position when, with +appalling suddenness, a thunderbolt descended. Nobody knows to this day +what took place. It was something Russian; some scandal in the Highest +Spheres which may see the light of day, centuries hence, when the +Imperial Archives are disclosed as musty court history to the eyes of +students curious in such matters. At this crisis, when 44,323 persons, +mostly liberals, were awaiting trial in the prisons of the Capital, the +ex-monk would doubtless have been quietly removed after the fashion of +court favourites, not by his adherents, now numbering many hundred +thousands, threatened a revolution. A secret compromise was effected. +He was banished, with every outward mark of disgrace, to a monastery in +the remote and inhospitable region of Viatka, there to meditate upon +the instability of human affairs. The illumined period was drawing +nigh. The Capital, on the whole, was glad to see the last of +him--particuarly the prisoners awaiting trial. + +The diet and discipline nearly killed him at first. He was consoled by +knowing that his fame had spread far and wide. The Court being +unwilling to publish the true facts of his disgrace, he was regarded as +a martyr, a victim of political intrigue, an injured saint. Disciples +multiplied. The GOLDEN BOOK was filled with priceless sayings--wise and +salutary maxims which echoed from end to end of the country. The New +Jerusalem took on a definite shape; the nucleus of the movement, the +initiated among his followers, were retained as the "Sacred 63"; he +called them his apostles and himself their Messiah, which some people +thought rather presumptuous of him. His reputation for sanctity became +such that he was once more a power to be reckoned with; the Court, in +fact, was on the verge of receiving him into favour again, when the +Second Revelation was announced. It ran to this effect: Flesh and blood +of warm-blooded beasts is Abomination to the Little White Cows. Asked +how he contrived to formulate so novel and tremendous a proposition, he +answered that it just came to him. His followers--there were about three +million of them now--instantly refused to touch the Unclean Thing, and +all would have gone well but for the fact that the Army was tinctured +with the New Faith, and that the Grand Dukes had recently become +involved in extensive and lucrative contracts for supplying the troops +with mean. The soldiery refusing to eat either beef or mutton or pork, +percentages declined. These leaders took up a firm patriotic attitude. +The health and morale of the entire Army, they declared, was dependent +upon a sound nutritive diet obtainable only through the operation of +certain radioactive oxydised magneto-carbon-hydrates which exist +nowhere save in the muscular tissue of animals. This new heresy +endangered the very foundations of Empire! They were not people to +compromise where questions of national prosperity were concerned. They +suggested, privately, that he should cancel his Revelation. He refused. +They then sent him a confidential messenger offering the choice of +assassination or deportation within the space of three hours. He +inclined to the latter alternative, and was straightway conveyed to the +frontier by special train with as many rouble notes in his pocket as he +had been able to scrape together in the flurry of departure. Some +disturbances broke out when the news of his banishment became known; a +few whiffs of grape-shot worked wonders. The majority of his adherents +abjured their error; the rest of them, aided by charitable +contributions from a secret committee of enthusiasts, found their way +abroad to dwell under the shadow of the banished Messiah. The expiatory +period was approaching. Russia, on the whole, was glad to see the last +of him--particularly the Grand Ducal party. + +A broken man, he decided to establish himself on Nepenthe, drawn +thither partly on account of the climate but chiefly by the report of +its abounding lobsters and fishes, an article of diet of which he was +inordinately fond. Disciples followed singly, and in batches. Their +scarlet blouses became a familiar object in the streets of the place; +good-natured and harmless folks for the most part who, if they ran up +bills with the local trades-people which they failed to pay, did so not +out of natural dishonesty but because they had no money. They used to +bathe, in summertime, at a certain little cove near the foot of the +promontory on which Madame Steynlin's villa was situated. She watched +their naked antics at first with disapproval--what could you expect, she +would say, from Russians? Then she observed them eating raw crabs and +things. It struck her that they must be hungry. Being a lady of the +sentimental type, childless, and never so happy as when feeding or +mothering somebody, she took to sending them down baskets of food, or +carrying it herself. They were so poor, so far from their homes, so +picturesque in those red shirts and leathern belts! + +Of late years Madame Steynlin had given up marrying, having at last, +after many broken hopes, definitely convinced herself that husbands +were only after her money. Rightly or wrongly, she wanted to be loved +for herself; loved, she insisted, body and soul. Even as the fires of +Erebus slumber beneath their mantle of ice, she concealed, under a +varnish of conventionality--the crust was not so thick in her case--a +nature throbbing with passion. She was everlastingly unappeased, +because incurably romantic. All life, she truly declared, is a search +for a friend. Unfortunately she sought with her eyes open, having never +grasped the elementary truth that to find a friend one must close one +eye: to keep him--two. She always attributed to men qualities which, she +afterwards discovered, they did not possess. Her life since the +marrying period had been a breathless succession of love affairs, each +more eternal than the last. + +In matters such as these, Madame Steynlin was the reverse of the +Duchess. True to her ideal of La Pompadour, that lady did not mind how +many men danced attendance on her--the more the merrier. Nor did she +bother about their ages; for all she cared, they might be, and often +were, the veriest crocks. She was rather particular, however, about +stiff collars and things; the appearance and conversation of her +retinue, she avowed, should be of the kind to pass muster in good +society. Madame Steynlin liked to have not more than one man escorting +her at a time, and he should be young, healthy-looking, and full of +life. In regard to minor matters she preferred, if anything, Byronic +collars to starched ones; troubling little, for the rest, what costume +her cavalier was wearing or what opinions he expressed. In fact, she +liked youngsters to be frank, impetuous, extravagant in their views and +out of the common rut. The two ladies had been likened to Divine and +Earthly Love, or to Venus Urania and Venus Pandemos--a comparison which +was manifestly unfair to both of them. + +It was during this summer bathing that Madame Steynlin had made +acquaintance of what was, at the time, the Master's favourite disciple. +His name happened to be Peter--Peter Arsenievitch Krasnojabkin. He was a +fine son of earth--a strapping young giant who threw himself into +eating, drinking, and other joys of life with enviable barbaric zest. +There was not an ounce of piety in his composition. He had donned the +scarlet blouse because he wanted to see Nepenthe and, like the +Christians of old, had no money. Driven by that roving spirit which is +the Muscovite's heritage and by the desire of all sensible men to taste +new lands, new wine, new women, he professed himself a Little White +Cow. It was quite the regular thing to do. It brought you to the notice +of that secret committee of enthusiasts who paid your travel expenses; +it gave you a free trip to the sunny south. Everyone wondered how he +had managed to rise so rapidly in the Master's graces. Madame Steynlin +now stepped between them. She grew fond of Peter, and marked him for +her own. He fulfilled every one of her conditions as to age, costume +and opinions. Besides, he was always so gloriously hungry! She invited +him to take luncheon once or twice and then began to take Russian +lessons from him. "He is only a boy," she would say. + +Conversing, as best she could, with this child of nature, it dawned +upon her that she had hitherto been mistaken in her estimate of the +Russian character. She began to understand the inward sense of that +brotherly love, that apostolic spirit, which binds together every class +of the immense Empire--to revere their simplicity of soul and calm +god-like faith. She revised her former narrow Lutheran views and openly +confessed that she was quite wrong in declaring, as she once did, that +what the Little White Cows needed was "more soap and less salvation." +The magic of love! It softened, not for the first time, her heart +towards all humanity and in particular, on this occasion, towards the +rest of the saintly band; were they not her brothers and sisters? She +even knitted six pairs of warm woollen socks and sent them with a +polite message to the Master--a message which was left unanswered, +though the socks were never returned. As to Peter--she called him her +Little Peter or, in his more expansive moments, Peter the Great. Soon +he was always coming to the villa at meal-times and staying for hours +afterwards, while they wrestled with the complexities of Russian +genders. He made no secret of the pleasure he derived from filling his +healthy young stomach at her expense; everything supplementary to that +prime condition he took as a gift from the gods. If he had not been so +simple-minded he could have wheedled any amount of money out of her. +The affair had now been going on for four month--quite a long while, as +such affairs went. + +Not for the first time did Madame Steynlin experience the drawbacks of +her house, as regards natural situation. It was, as Don Francesco often +pointed out, "the most unstrategic villa on Nepenthe." Ah, that +peninsula, that isthmus, or whatever you called the thing--what on earth +had attracted her to the place? What demon had tempted her to buy it? +How she envied the other people--Keith, for example, who, if he had been +a man of that kind, could have allowed any visitor, in the broadest +daylight, to creep in or out of his mouldy old gateway in the wall +without a soul being any the wiser! High-priced horticultural experts +had been consulted as to the best means of thickening the vegetation +and screening the approaches to the house. They had met with scanty +success. The soil was of the most sterile, intractable rock; those few +wind-blown olives were dreadfully diaphanous, and Peter's blouse +visible from afar--even from the market-place. Everything got about on +Nepenthe. People began to twit her about the progress of those "Russian +lessons." It became quite a scandal. Signor Malipizzo was more annoyed +than any one else. He hated the whole brood of Russians, and had formed +various projects for uprooting the association from the island. His +friend the Commissioner thoroughly endorsed these views. Often he +declared that something must be done about it. + +The Master, despite his seclusion, had heard of the affair. He was +grieved, but not unduly so; he had other disciples to choose from. +Every new arrival from Holy Russia, regardless of sex or age, spent +some hours or days, as the case might be, alone with the Master in his +apartment, in order to be initiated into the Law and impregnated with +its full signification: such was the way of the New Jerusalem. By this +system of spiritual control he could be sure of finding a successor +sooner or later. Besides, the defection of this favourite disciple was +only a drop in the ocean of his griefs. What secretly preyed upon his +mind was that, on the verge of returning to his former state of worldly +prosperity, he had been inspired to issue that Second Revelation +regarding warm-blooded beasts. He ought to have known about the Grand +Dukes, and what a sacrilegious hot-tempered clique they were! "This +comes," he would say, "of placing the service of God above that of my +earthly masters." It kept him in exile on this island--the deadlock in +the matter of that Second Revelation. The expiatory period was not yet +over, though Nepenthe, on the whole, would have been glad to see the +last of him--particularly Signor Malipizzo. + +Meanwhile, the Little White Cows lived on: the richer in houses, +sleeping fifteen or twenty in one room after the happy style of +patriarchal Russia--the humbler folk in old ruins, sheds, cellars, or +even caverns of the rock. You could do that sort of thing in a climate +like Nepenthe, if you were not fastidious in the matter of owls, bats, +lizards, toads, earwigs, centipedes, and an occasional scorpion. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XII + + + + + +No Russians dwelt within the Cave of Mercury. It was inconveniently +remote; it was difficult of approach; moreover, it was haunted. +Dreadful rites had been performed there, in olden times. The walls had +dripped with human gore. Death-groans of victims slain by the priestly +knife resounded in its hollow entrails. Such had been the legend in the +days of those monkish chroniclers in whose credulous pages Monsignor +Perrelli, incredulous himself, had discovered a mine of curious +information. + +Then came the Good Duke Alfred. His Highness posed as a conservative in +some matters; it pleased him to revive memories of the long-buried +past. He cared little about ghosts. He liked to take things in hand. +After remarking in his brisk epigrammatic fashion that "not everything +old is putrid," he devoted his attention to the Cave of Mercury and +caused a flight of convenient stairs to be built, wide enough to admit +the passage of two of his fattest Privy Councillors walking abreast, +and leading down to this particular grotto through a cleft in the rock. +Nobody knew what happened there under his superintendence. Mankind +being ever prone to believe the worst of every great man, all kinds of +stupid and even wicked things were said, though not during his +lifetime. People vowed that he carried on the old traditions, the +tortures and human sacrifices, and even improved upon them in his +blithe Renaissance manner. They were ready to supply circumstantial and +excruciating details of how, disguised, down to the minutest details of +costume, in the semblance of the Evil One, he had sought to prolong his +life and invigorate his declining health with the blood of innocent +children, artfully done to death after fiendish, lingering agonies. +Father Capocchio, needless to say, has some shocking pages on this +subject. + +Mr. Eames, who had made a careful study of Duke Alfred's reign, came to +the conclusion that such excesses were incompatible with the character +of a ruler whose love of children was one of his most salient traits. +In regard to those other and vaguer accusations, he contended that the +Duke was too jovial by nature to have tortured any save those who, in +his opinion, thoroughly deserved it. Indeed, he was sceptical about the +whole thing. Monsignor Perrelli might have told us the truth, had he +cared to do so. But, for reasons which will appear anon, he is +remarkably silent on all that concerns the reign of his great +contemporary. He says nothing more than this: + +"His Highness deigned, during the same year, to restore, and put into +its old working order, the decayed heathen rock-chapel vulgarly known +as the Cave of Mercury." + +To put into ITS OLD WORKING ORDER; that would sound rather suspicious, +as though to contain a veiled accusation. We must remember, however, +that the historian of Nepenthe bore a grudge against his Prince (of +which likewise more anon), a grudge which he was far too prudent to +vent openly; so bitter and personal a grudge that he may have felt +himself justified in making a covert innuendo of this kind whenever he +could safely risk it. + +Meanwhile, everything remained as before--shrouded in mystery. Being +doubly haunted now, by the Duke's victims and by those earlier ones, +the cave fell into greater neglect than ever. Simple folk avoided +speaking of the place save in a hushed whisper. It became a proverb +among the islanders when speaking of something outrageously improbable: +"Don't tell me! Such things only happen in the Cave of Mercury." When +someone disappeared from his house or hotel without leaving any trace +behind--it happened now and then--or when anything disreputable happened +to anyone, they always said "Try the Cave," or simply "Try Mercury." +The path had crumbled away long ago. Nobody went there, except in broad +daylight. It was as safe a place as you could desire, at night-time, +for a murder or a love-affair. Such was the Cave of Mercury. + +Denis had gone to the spot one morning not long after his arrival. He +had climbed down the slippery stairs through that dank couloir or +funnel in the rock overhung with drooping maidenhair and ivy and +umbrageous carobs. He had rested on the little platform outside the +cavern's vineyard far below, and upwards, at the narrow ribbon of sky +overhead. Then he had gone within, to examine what was left of the old +masonry, the phallic column and other relics of the past. That was ten +days ago. Now he meant to follow Keith's advice and go there at +midnight. The moon was full. + +"This very night I'll go," he thought. + +All was not well with Denis. And the worst of it was, he had no clear +notion of what was the matter. He was changing. The world was changing +too. It had suddenly expanded. He felt that he, also, ought to expand. +There was so much to learn, to see, to know--so much, that it seemed to +paralyse his initiative. Could he absorb all this? Would he ever get +things in order once more, and recapture his self-possession? Would he +ever again be satisfied with himself? It was an invasion of his +tranquillity, from within and without. He was restless. Bright ideas +never came to him, as of old; or else they were the ideas of other +people. A miserable state of affairs! He was becoming an automaton--an +echo. + +An echo.... How right Keith had been! + +"It's rotten," he concluded. "I'm a ludicrous figure, a pathetic +idiot." + +The novel impressions of Florence had helped in the disintegration. +Nepenthe--it's sunshine, its relentless paganism--had done the rest. It +shattered his earlier outlook and gave him nothing in exchange. +Nothing, and yet everything. That vision of Angelina! It filled his +inner being with luxurious content; content and uncertainty. It was +there, at the back of every dream, of every intimate thought and every +little worldly phrase that he uttered. He was like a man who, looking +long at the sun, sees its image floating in heaven, on earth--wherever +he casts his eye. Angelina! Nothing else was of any account. How would +it all end? He drifted along in blissful apprehension of what the next +day might bring. She seemed to have become genuinely well-disposed +towards him of late, though in rather a mocking, maternal sort of +fashion. + +The poetic vein had definitely run dry. Impossible to make things +rhyme, somehow. Perhaps his passion was too strong for technical +restraints. He tried his hand at prose: + +"Your eyes bewilder me. I would liken you to a shaft of sunlight, a +withering flame--a black flame, if such there be--for your grace and +ardour is even as a flame. Your step is laughter and song. Your hair is +a torrent of starless night. The sun is your lover, you god. He takes +joy in your perfection. Your slender body palpitates with his +imprisoned beams. He has moulded your limbs and kissed your smooth skin +in the days when you ... nevermore will you whiten those kisses...." + +"It won't do," he sadly reflected, laying down the pen. "The adaptation +is too palpable. Why does everybody anticipate my ideas? The fact is, I +have nothing to say. I can only feel. Everything went right, so long as +I was in love with myself. Now everything goes wrong." + +Then he remembered Keith's pompous exhortation. + +"Find yourself! You know the Cave of Mercury! Climb down, one night of +full moon--" + +"There is something in what he says. This very night I'll go." + +It was particularly hard for him that evening. The Duchess was dining +with a party at Madame Steynlin's; it was an open secret that the +entertainment would end in a moonlight excursion on the water; she +would not return till very late. Angelina would be alone, accessible. +It was her duty to guard the house in the absence of its mistress. He +might have gone there on some pretext and talked awhile, and looked +into her elvish eyes and listened to that Southern voice, rich and +clear as a bell. Almost he yielded. He thought of the ineptitude of the +whole undertaking and, in particular, of those slippery stairs; one +might break one's neck there at such an hour of the night. Unless one +wore tennis shoes-- + +Well, he would wear them. He would resist the temptation and approve +himself a man. Everybody, even the Duchess, was always telling him to +be a man. He would find himself. Keith was right. + +The night came. + +He descended noiselessly into the cool and dark chasm, resting awhile +on a ledge about half-way down, to drink in the spirit of the place. +All was silent. Dim masses towered overhead; through rifts in the rocky +fabric he caught glimmerings, strange and yet familiar, of the +landscape down below. It swam in the milky radiance of a full moon +whose light streamed down from some undiscoverable source behind the +mountain, suffusing the distant vineyards and trees with a ghostly +tinge of green. Like looking into another world, he though; a poet's +world. Calmly it lay there, full of splendour. How well one could +understand, in such a place, the glamour, the romance, of night! +Romance.... What was left of life without romance? He remembered his +talk with Marten; he thought of the scientists crude notions of +romance. He pitied the materialism which denied him joys like these. +This moonlit landscape--how full of suggestion! That grotto down +below--what tales it could unfold! + +The Cave of Mercury.... + +How had Mercury, the arch-thief, come to be presiding genius here? +Denis knew; his friend Eames had explained everything to him. Mercury +had nothing whatever to do with the site. That name had been proved by +the bibliographer to be the invention of some pedantic monk who liked +to display his learning to a generation avid of antiquities, a +generation which insisted on attaching a Roman deity to every cavern. +It was a wilful fabrication, made in the infancy of archaeology when +historical criticism was non-existent. And the same with all those +stories about human sacrifices and tortures. There was not a word of +truth in them. So Mr. Eames had decided, after a systematic +investigation of both of the older authorities and of the grotto +itself. The legends, too, were simply invented to give a zest to a +locality whose original antique name had apparently been lost, though +he had not yet abandoned all hope of stumbling across it by one of +those lucky accidents which reward the lover of old parchments and +title-deeds. A pure invention. It was plain the Mr. Eames from what +remained of ancient symbols on the spot, that the cave had been +consecrated to older and worthier rites--to some mysterious, primeval, +fecund Mother of Earth. Her name, like that of her habitation, had +lapsed into oblivion. + +"There is something grand in this old animistic conception," Eames had +said. "Later on, under the Romans, the place seems to have been +dedicated to Priapic rites. That is rather a depreciation, isn't it? It +brings us down from fruitfulness to mere lasciviousness. But where are +you going to draw the line? Everything tends to lose its hallowed +meaning; it becomes degraded, bestialized. Still, the roots of the idea +are sound. In giving sensual attributes to a garden god the ancients +had in mind the recklessness, the spendthrift abundance, of all +nature--not excluding our own. They tried to explain how it came about +that the sanest man is liable, under the stress of desire, to acts of +which he vainly repents at leisure. I don't suppose they meant to +justify those acts. If they had, they would have given a less equivocal +position to Priapus in their celestial hierarchy. Priapus, you know, +was not wholly divine. I think they only wanted to make it quite clear +that we cannot drive out nature with a fork. I wish we could," he +added. + +And then he sighed. The poor fellow was thinking at that moment, of +balloons. + +Denis remembered this conversation. Earth-worship: the cult of those +generative forces which weld together in one mighty instinct the +highest and lowliest of terrestrial creatures.... The unalienable +right of man and beast to enact that which shall confound death, and +replenish the land with youth, and joy, and teeming life. The right +which priestly castes of every age have striven to repress, which +triumphs over every obstacle and sanctifies, by its fruits, the wildest +impulses of man. The right to love! + +Musing thus, he began to understand why men of old, who looked things +squarely in the face, should have deified this friendly, all-compelling +passion. He reverenced the fierce necessity which drives the living +world to its fairest and sole enduring effort. Be fruitful and +multiply. He recognized for the firs ttime that he was not a lonely +figure on earth, but absorbed into a solemn and eternal movement; bound +close to the throbbing heart of the Universe. There was grandeur, there +was repose, in being able to regard himself as an integral part of +nature, destined to create and leave his mark. He felt that he was +growing into harmony with permanent things--finding himself. He realized +now what Keith had meant. + +It cost him quite an effort to tear himself away from that ledge. He +began to descend once more. + +Near the entrance of the Cave he paused abruptly. It seemed as if a +sound had issued from the interior of the rock. He listened. It came +again--a human sound, unquestionably, and within a few yards of his +face. A whisper. There was something going on--Earth-worship.... + +Suddenly a succession of words broke upon the stillness--breathless +words, spoken in a language which not everybody could have translated. +He recognized the voice. It said: + +"EGO TE AMARE TANTUM! NON VOLERE? NON PIACERE? NON CAPIRE? O Lord, +can't you understand?" + +It was Mr. Marten's voice. Mr. Marten was being romantic. No answer +came to his fervent pleadings. Perhaps they were not coherent enough. +He began again, TREMOLO AGITATO, CON MOLTO SENTIMENTO: + +"O EGO TE AMARE TANTUM! NEMO SAPIT NIHIL. DUCHESSA IN BARCA AQUATICA +CUM MAGNA COMPANIA. REDIBIT TARDISSIMO. NIENTE TIMOR. AMARE MULTISSIMO! +EGO MORIRE FINE TE. MORIRE. MORITURUS. CAPITO? NON CAPIRE? Oh, CAPIRE +be blowed!" + +There was a short pause. The language seems to have been understood +this time. For, amid a ripple of laughter, a rich Southern voice was +heard to say with a sigh of mock resignation: + +"SIA FATTA LA VOLONTA DI DIO!" + +Then silence.... + +Denis turned. He walked up the steps as in a dream, neither slowly nor +fast. No one was ever more unhappy, though he scarcely felt as yet the +depths of his own humiliation. It was more like a stab--a numbing +assassin-like stab. He could hear the beatings of his heart. + +He reached the upper level of the town, he knew not how. + +All lay quiet as he found his way among the familiar buildings. It was +after midnight; most of the lamps had been extinguished. The streets +were deserted. He heard, in the distance, the song of a drunken +wayfarer reeling homewards from a tavern or from the Club. + +In one of the little roadways that converge upon the market-place +something was astir. It was a dim phantom of willowy outline, swaying +capriciously to and fro, like a black feather tossed by the wind. Miss +Wilberforce! She fluttered down a doorstep and began crooning a vulgar +song about "Billy had a letter for to go on board a ship." Denis moved +to the other side of the narrow path, hoping to escape unobserved. The +light was too strong. + +"My young friend," she cried in quite a hoarse and altered tone of +voice, "we should know each other! We've had the pleasure haven't we? +Been down to the sea, have you? And what are the wild waves saying?" + +Denis stood there, petrified with disgust. Was it possible? Was this +the lady who had charmed him the other day? Who had spoken of England +and conjured up the memories of his own home in the Midlands? With a +playful gesture, she sent her hat careering across the street and began +to fumble at her breast, unlacing or unbuttoning something. It was +horrible, in the moonlight. + +A boot, flying merrily over his head, recalled him to his senses. He +turned to go, and had already made a few paces when the voice croaked +after him: + +"Does your mother know you're out?" + + + + + + +CHAPTER XIII + + + + + +Some good genius took him by the hand next day and led him to the house +of Count Caloveglia, in response to that friendly twice-repeated +invitation. The old man saw at a glance that something serious was +amiss. He plunged at once, with quick insight, into what he took to be +extraneous topics of conversation. + +"I am glad you like my fig tree! It gives a distinctive tone to this +quiet courtyard, don't you think? I could not have wished for anything +more appropriate. Its shape, its associations, are alike pleasing. The +fig is a legendary tree; a volume could be written about the stories +and superstitions which have twined themselves around it. Some think it +was the Biblical Tree of Knowledge. Judas Iscariot, they say, hanged +himself on a fig tree. It came from the East-Bacchus brought it on his +journey as a gift to mortal men. How much we owe to those of the Greek +gods who were yet not wholly divine! The Romans, too, held it in +veneration. You have doubtless heard about the FICUS RUMINALIS, at hose +feet the cradle of Romulus and Remus was stranded? Among many nations +it became the outward symbol of generative forces. The Egyptians +consecrated the fig to Isis, that fecund Mother of Earth. Statues of +Priapus were carved out of its wood in allusion, possibly, to its +reckless fertility or for some analogous reason; it was also held to be +sacred, I know not why, to Mercury--" + +Denis, during this little speech, had begun to look more troubled than +ever. The other continued: + +"There is something in the very twistings of that smooth trunk and +those heavy-laden branches that suggests fruitfulness, How voluptuously +they writhe! A kindly growth, lover of men, their dwellings and ordered +ways. That is why we foster it. We are all utilitarians here, Mr. +Denis; we think of the main purposes of life. Besides food, it gives us +welcome shade at this season; the leaves fall off in winter and allow +the sunlight to percolate into our rooms. You will not find evergreen +trees planted near our windows. We know the value of sunshine; where +the sun enters, we say, the physician does not enter. In England the +light is feebler and yet they made this mistake, during the Georgian +period of architecture. They thought that houses were invented to be +looked at, not to be lived in. Determined to be faithful to the +tradition and regardless of the difference in climate, they planted the +ilex about those mansions which must be dank and gloomy in wintertime, +however charming, externally, to those who relish the chill Palladian +outlines. You have lately been to Florence, I hear? Come! Let us sit +indoors. The courtyard is rather too sultry to-day, in spite of the +shade. My old servant will bring some tea, presently. Or perhaps you +would prefer some wine and a biscuit? Or a glass of liqueur?... +Well? And Florence?" + +"It has left me rather confused, so far," replied Denis. "Some of the +things are overwhelming." + +"Overwhelming? That is perhaps because you do not see the movement in +its continuity, because you have not traced the stream to its source. I +can understand your feelings. But one need not be overwhelmed by these +men. They were lovable folks, who played with their art like some child +that has discovered a long-lost toy. It is a pity that their activities +were so hampered by the conventions of religious dogma. Viewed by +itself, the Renaissance may seem overwhelming; it shoots up like a +portentous lily out of the blood-drenched soil of a thousand +battlefields. Let me take you to its real source." + +He showed him that little statuette, the Locri Faun. Denis was +enchanted by it. + +"You have heard of Sir Herbert Street? He also thinks highly of this +thing. He is now adviser in art matters to Mr. van Koppen who is a +patron of mine and who, I hear, will arrive to-morrow or the day +after." + +"Street? I met him at my mother's house. Wasn't he at South Kensington? +A great man for dining out. You cannot pick up an evening paper without +reading something about him. That kind of man! All the same, he wrote a +good book on the Siena School. I liked it, didn't you?" + +"It is a fair appreciation, from the collector's point of view. He has +stayed with me here once or twice, and given me reason to form a high +opinion of his capacities. Now if you will compare this Faun with your +Florentine art, you will see what I mean by going to the fountain. +There is a difference not only in technique, but in outlook. The man +who wrought this did not trouble about you, or me, or himself. He had +not moods. His art is purely intellectual; he stands aloof, like a +glacier. Here the spring issued, crystal-clear. As the river swells in +size it grows turbid and discoloured with alien elements--personality, +emotions." + +"I have noticed that," said Denis. "It is what we call the malady of +thought. This Faun, you say, was found on the mainland yonder?" + +"Near the site of old Locri, on a piece of ground which still belongs +to me. I suspect there are still a good many Greek relics to be +excavated on the site. We have discovered a Demeter some years ago; a +mutilated head in marble; it is now in Paris. You can see the very +place from my roof here, on bright days. These men, Mr. Denis, were our +masters. Do not be misled by what you are told of the wanton luxury of +those shores; do not forget that your view of that age has filtered +through Roman stoicism and English puritanism which speak with envy +lurking at their hearts--the envy of the incomplete creature for him who +dares express himself. A plague has infected the world--the plague of +repression. Don't you think that the man who made this Faun was +entitled to dine well?" + +"I cannot quite make it out," said Denis, still examining the +statuette. + +"Ah! How does it make you feel?" + +"Uneasy." + +"You are unaware of a struggle between your own mind and that of the +artist? I am glad. It is the test of beauty and vitality that a +beholder refuses to acquiesce at first glance. There is a conflict to +be undergone. This thing thrusts itself upon us; it makes no +concessions, does it? And yet one cannot but admire! You will seldom +encounter that sensation among the masterpieces of the Renaissance. +They welcome you with open arms. That is because we know what the +creators were thinking about. They are quite personal and familiar; +they had as many moods, one suspects, as a fashionable prima donna. +They give pleasure. This Faun gives pleasure and something more--a sense +of disquieting intimacy. While intruding upon your reserve with his +solemn, stark and almost hostile novelty, he makes at the same time a +strange appeal--he touches upon chords in our nature of which we +ourselves were barely cognisant. You must yield, Mr. Denis, to this +stranger who seems to know so much about you. When you have done so, +you will make a surprising discovery. You have gained a friend--one of +those who never change." + +"I am trying to," replied Denis. "But it is difficult. We are not +brought up that way, nowadays." + +"No. Men have lost their frankness, their self-assurance. Whoever +yields, must be confident of his own strength. Our contemporaries have +lost that feeling. They dare not be themselves. They eke out lack of +sincerity by profusion of commonplace. Unlike the heroes of Homer, they +repress their fears--they repress everything, save their irrepressible +flatulence of mind. They are expansive in unimportant matters and at +wrong moments--blown about in a whirl of fatuous extremes. The +impersonal note has vanished. Why has it gone, Mr. Denis?" he suddenly +asked. "And when did it go?" + +The other was rather puzzled what to reply. + +"I suppose you could trace its disappearance to the days of which you +spoke, when artists began to display their moods to the world. Perhaps +further still. Some Roman writers were fond of talking about their own +affairs. If they do, the public naturally becomes interested. People +like Byron must have had a good deal to do with it. He was always +harping on his private life." + +He paused, but the Count merely asked: + +"No further back than that?" + +"I don't know. Christianity made us interested in other people's +feelings. Brotherliness, you know. That must have helped. So did +Socrates, by the way. Of course it lowers the general standard. Where +everybody can read and write, there's an end of good taste. No, I don't +mean that exactly," he added, feeling that he was expressing himself +very stupidly. + +"Well?" + +"Oh, everything! The telegraph and society papers and interviewing and +America and yellow journalism ... and all those family memoirs and +diaries and autobiographies and Court scandals.... They produce a +new kind of public, a public which craves for personalities rather than +information. They want to learn about our clothes and incomes and +habits. Not a questioning public, I mean; a prying public--" + +"A cannibalistic public," said the Count, quietly. "Men cannot live, it +seems, save by feeding on their neighbour's life-blood. They prey on +each other's nerve-tissues and personal sensations. Everything must be +shared. It gives them a feeling of solidarity, I suppose, in a world +where they have lost the courage to stand alone. Woe to him who dwells +apart! Great things are no longer contemplated with reverence. They are +hauled down from their pedestals in order to be rendered accessible to +a generation of pigmies; their dignity is soiled by vulgar contact. +This lust of handling--what is its ordinary name? Democracy. It has +abraded the edge of that keen anthropocentric outlook of the Greeks +which exalted whatever was distinctively human. Men have learnt to see +beauty here, there, and everywhere--a little beauty, mark you, not much! +They fail to realize that in widening their capacity of appreciation +they dilute its intensity. They have watered their wine. There is more +to drink. The draught is poorer." + +It seemed to Denis that the Count's wine had not been watered. + +"Let me show you one or two other things," said the old man. + +They wandered about the premises awhile, looking at marbles, prints, +intaglios, coins, till a serving man entered--a clean-shaven and rather +bony old creature whom the Count called Andrea--to announce tea. Denis +was feeling calmer; he had fallen under the beguiling influence of this +place. He realized that his host was different from the artist type he +had hitherto encountered; more profound, more veracious. Already he +formed the project of returning to listen to his melodious voice, and +learn some more about that Hellenic life which had hitherto been a +sealed book to him. Nobody every spoke to him after the Count's +fashion. He contrasted his address with the bantering, half-apologetic, +supercilious tone of those other elderly persons who had heretofore +deigned to enlightened him. He was flattered and pleased at being taken +seriously and bidden to think in this straightforward, manly fashion; +it unstrung his reserve and medicined to his wounded self-respect. + +"So your mother would like to see you in Parliament?" asked the Count. +"Politics are apt to be a dirty game. One cannot touch dirt without +soiling one's hands. We have a deputy here, the Commendator +Morena--well, one does not like to speak about him. Let me ask you a +question, Mr. Denis. Why do politicians exist?" + +"I suppose the answer would be that is profitable to mankind to be run +by somebody." + +"Profitable, at all events, to those who do the running. Your good Sir +Herbert Street has lately sent me a batch of books about the ideal +public life of the future. Socialistic forecasts, and that kind of +literature. He is a world-improver, you know, among other things. They +have amused me more than I thought they would. That venerable blunder: +to think that in changing the form of government you change the heart +of man. And in other respects, too, these dreamers are at sea. For +surely we should aim at simplification of machinery. Conceive, now, the +state of affairs where everybody is more or less employed by the +community--the community, that comfortable word!--in some patriotic +business or other. Everybody an official, all controlling each other! +It would be worse than the Spanish Inquisition. A man could live at +Toledo by subscribing to certain fixed opinions; he could be assured of +a reasonable degree of privacy. Nothing could save him, under +socialism. An insupportable world! When people cease to reflect they +become idealists." + +"I suppose they do," replied Denis, rather dubiously. Then it struck +him that this might account for his own hazy state of mind--this lack of +occupation or guiding principle. For the rest, he had not given much +thought to such questions. To be a politician--it was one of the few +projects which had never seriously entered his head. After a pause, he +remarked: + +"I can't help noticing that portrait over there. It's a very pretty +thing." + +"The little pastel? It is a sketch of my daughter Matilda. I did it +myself when she was here last Christmas. Poor child, she can only come +for the holidays; there is no chance of a respectable education o this +island. But I can run over to see her every now and then. You will +observe I am not much of a colourist!" + +"You have been parsimonious with the tints. It reminds me of some of +Lenbach's work which I saw at Florence; it is in the same manner." + +"It appears you like art," said the Count. "Why not devote yourself to +it? But perhaps your English social conditions are not propitious. Here +is a letter from a friend of mind which arrived this morning; you know +his name--I will not mention it! A well-known Academician, whose life is +typical of your attitude towards art. Such a good fellow. He likes +shooting and fishing; he is a favourite at Court, and quite an +authority on dress-reform. He now writes to ask me about some detail of +Greek costume which he requires for one of his lectures to a Ladies' +Guild. Art, to him, is not a jealous mistress; she is an indulgent +companion, who will amiably close an eye and permit a few wayside +flirtations to her lover--enthusiasms for quite other ideals, and for +the joys of good society in general. That is the way to live a happy +life. It is not the way to create masterpieces." + +"I would take myself seriously, I think," said Denis. "I would not +dissipate my energies." + +He meant it. To be an artist--it dawned upon him that this was his true +vocation. To renounce pleasure and discipline the mind; to live a life +of self-denial, submitting himself humbly to the inspiration of the +great masters.... To be serene, like this old man; to avoid that +facile, glib, composite note--those monkey-tricks of cleverness.... + +Then, after this vision had passed before his eyes like a flash, he +remembered his grief. The notion of becoming a world-famous artist lost +all meaning for him. Everything was blighted. There was not a grain of +solace to be found on earth. + +The Count, meanwhile, was looking with concern upon his companion's +grave face, whose flawless profile might have emerged into life under +the thought-laden chisel of Lysippus. He wondered what he could say or +do to drive away this melancholy. The youth had been so bright that day +at the entertainment of the Duchess; he seemed to have stepped straight +out of a sunny dialogue of Plato. Serious trouble now shone out of his +eyes. Something had happened. Something was wrong with him; wrong, +too--he reflected--with a world which could find no better occupation for +such a person than to hand round buttered tea-cakes at an old woman's +party to a crowd of cosmopolitan scandalmongers. + +Denis rose, remarking: + +"I wish I could stay a little longer! But it is getting so late. I'm +afraid I must be going." + +He held out his hand. + +"You have caught me in a somewhat sad and depressed mood, I fear," +replied the other, heaving a most artistic sigh. And his features +suddenly looked quite careworn. As a matter of fact, he had not been so +joyous for many long years--that news of Mr. van Koppen's proximate +arrival having made him feel fifty years younger and, but for his +ingrained sense of Hellenic moderation, almost ready to dance with +delight. + +"I am sorry I have been so despondent," he went on. "Sometimes one +cannot help oneself. It shall not occur again! I will try to be more +amusing next time you come. If I thought it would help, I would +communicate my sorrows and claim your sympathy. But what does it avail +to unburden oneself? Friends will share our joys, but every man is a +solitary in his griefs. One soon finds that out! One soon realizes the +vanity of all those talks about the consolations of philosophy and the +comforts of religion, doesn't one? I suppose even you have your moments +of dejection?" + +"One worries about things now and then. It is perfectly natural, I +daresay." + +"Perfectly. We are not stones--least of all persons like yourself. I +would not be at your age again, not for the wealth of Croesus! I +suffered too much. All young people suffer too much; they bear it +silently, like heroes. The eye of youth dilates and distorts the +images. The focussing process is painful. Youth has no norm. It was in +one of my worst fits of despondency, I remember, that my old teacher +gave me certain advice, after I had puzzled it out, did me some good. +In fact, I have acted upon it to this very day; I recall it as plainly +as if he were speaking now. Well, I am sorry you are leaving. I would +keep you hear if I could. But I hope you will not forget to come +another day. You have cheered me up wonderfully! Shall Andrea find you +a carriage?" + +"What did he say?" asked Denis. + +"The old teacher? Let me see.... He said: do not be discomposed by +the opinions of inept persons. Do not swim with the crowd. They who are +all things to their neighbours, cease to be anything to themselves. +Even a diamond can have too many facets. Avoid the attrition of vulgar +minds; keep your edges intact. He also said: A man can protect himself +with fists or sword but his best weapon is his intellect. A weapon must +be forged in the fire. The fire, in our case, is tribulation. It must +also be kept untarnished. If the mind is clean, the body can take care +of itself. He said: delve deeply; not too deeply into the past, for it +may make you derivative; nor yet into yourself--it will make you +introspective. Delve into the living world and strive to bind yourself +to its movement by a chain of your own welding. Once that contact is +established, you are unassailable. Externalize yourself! He told me +many things of this kind. You think I was consoled by his words? Not in +the slightest degree. I was annoyed. In fact, I thought him rather a +hypocrite; anybody could have spoken as he did! I was so disappointed +that I went to him next day and told him frankly what I thought of his +counsel. He said--do you know what he said?" + +"I cannot even guess." + +"He said: 'What is all wisdom save a collection of platitudes? Take +fifty of our current proverbial sayings--they are so trite, so +threadbare, that we can hardly bring our lips to utter them. None the +less they embody the concentrated experience of the race, and the man +who orders his life according to their teaching cannot go far wrong. +How easy that seems! Has any one ever done so? Never. Has any man ever +attained to inner harmony by pondering the experiences of others? Not +since the world began! He must pass through the fire.'" + +"I had no teacher like that," observed Denis. "He must have been a man +of the right kind." + +"Oh, he meant well, the old rascal," replied the Count with a curious +little smile. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XIV + + + + + +Denis descended from the Old Town. At a turn of the road he overtook +the bishop who was moving slowly in the same direction. + +"How is Mrs. Meadows?" enquired the young man. + +"Not particularly well, I'm afraid. And the Count?" + +"Oh, quite all right." + +They walked along in silence, having little to say to each other. That +visit had done Denis good; he would return soon again, if only for the +purpose of cheering up the lonely old man who, at the last moment, had +given him a photograph of the Locri Faun, with a kindly inscription +from himself. He was not to show it to anybody, the Count had said--not +yet! The government must not hear about that relic--not yet! Later on, +perhaps very soon, everything would be in order. Denis cherished that +photo in his pocket. He was thinking, too, of the pastel--the face of +Matilda, which seemed like a star shining through the mist.... Then +he remembered the bishop walking at his side. He felt he ought to say +something more to this dry Colonial whom he could not help contrasting, +greatly to his disadvantage, with the Count. + +"Hasn't it been hot to-day?" + +"Stifling," replied Mr. Heard. "The warmest day we have had, so far. +Not a breath of wind." + +"Not a breath...." + +The conversation flagged once more. They did not hit it off, somehow; +they seemed to drift further apart every time they met. Each was +preoccupied with his own thoughts. The bishop was more taciturn than +usual; the interview with his cousin had not been quite a success. + +Denis, after a while, made another effort. He spoke of some of Count +Caloveglia's antiquities and, one thing leading to another, told Mr. +Heard the story of a friend of his in Florence who had excavated some +wonderful early Italian pots, fragments o them, out of an old garden +well. They were all lustred, he said. + +"That must have been a very pleasant surprise," observed the bishop, +who had small use for lustred ware and lunatics who collected it. +Feeling that it was his turn to say something, he remarked: + +"I am dining with the Duchess to-night. Will you be there?" + +"No," replied the young man with an unwonted air of decision. Never +again would he be seen in that austere old convent, built by the Good +Duke Alfred. Never again! Promptly, however, he toned down the +harshness of his answer by adding that the lady had very kindly asked +him to come, but he couldn't manage it, that evening. + +"I shall have to console her about the burglary," continued the bishop. + +"What burglary?" + +Mr. Heard explained that the premises had been entered while the +Duchess was dining at Madame Steynlin's on the previous evening, the +night of the water-party. Evidently the work of a man who knew his +business. A man familiar with the ins and outs of the house. And a man +of taste, into the bargain. All the sham articles had been left +untouched; he had gone off with nothing but genuine things--a few +precious crucifixes and bonbonnieres. No one had the faintest idea who +the thief was. Most mysterious! The disaster could hardly have occurred +but for the fact that the young girl Angelina, who was supposed to +sleep on the premises, had been called away late at night to look after +a suffering aunt. The old woman, it appeared, was liable to sudden +heart-attacks. She had been round to see the Duchess early in the +morning with endless apologies, and had fortunately been able to +corroborate her niece's story. + +"I am glad of it," concluded the bishop. "Because that maid, when I saw +her, struck me as rather a flighty young person--the sort of girl who +would take advantage of her mistress's absence to have a little +flirtation with a policeman round the corner. I am glad the aunt could +explain things so satisfactorily. I was wrong about that girl. Shows +how careful one must be in judging of other people, doesn't it? I must +say she looked to me like a regular little coquette." + +Denis had so little sympathetic comment to make on this painful story +that Mr. Heard was quite surprised at his indifference. He always +understood the young man to be a particular friend of the Duchess. + +"These artistic people!" he thought. "They have quite another way of +looking at things. Dear me. I shall never live to understand them." + +The two separated at the market-place without much reluctance on either +side. + +During dinner, the Duchess was calm about her misfortune. She bore it +well. She had been vigorously consoled by Don Francesco, who pointed +out that such little things are trials of faith and that she ought to +be thankful for this opportunity of proving how little she cared for +earthly riches. While not exactly thankful, she was certainly as +resigned as anybody could have been. Angelina had already been taken +into grace again, at the charitable suggestion of the priest. Every one +was puzzling who the thief could be (it happened to be Mr. Richards); +the police had not discovered the faintest clue. + +"It does not much matter if they do," said Don Francesco. "I don't +think, my dear lady, that you will get the judge to take up your case +very actively. You know how he hates the clericals. In fact, I fear he +will not move a finger unless the culprit also happens to be a good +believer. In that case, he might lock him up. He is so fond of +imprisoning Catholics!" + +"A bad state of the law," commented the bishop. + +"It is," replied Don Francesco, "And perhaps you do not know," he +added, turning to the company, "that there has been another robbery as +well, doubtless by the same hand. Yes! I only heard of it an hour ago. +Poor Miss Wilberforce is the victim. She is terribly upset. A number of +valuables have disappeared from her house; they must have been +ransacked, she thinks, at the time of Mr. Keith's party. I understand +she was rather overcome on that occasion. The thief seems to have been +aware of her condition, and to have profited by it." + +"Poor Miss Wilberforce!" said everybody. They were all sorry for poor +Miss Wilberforce. + +It was a rather full dinner-party on the whole. Mr. Heard left at +half-past eleven. + +Passing the Club on his way home, he remembered his intention of +looking in there and perhaps doing good to a few of those fellows. + +He climbed up the stairs. There was a fearful row going on. The place +was crammed with members of various nationalities, drinking and arguing +amid clouds of tobacco smoke. They seemed all to be at loggerheads with +one another and on the verge of breaking out into violence, the south +wind having been particularly objectionable all day long. A good deal +of filthy and profane language was being used--it was worse than those +hot places he had known in Africa. That pink-faced old drunkard known +as Charlie was the only person who made any signs of recognizing him. +He half rose from his chair with a genial: "Hello, Bishop--" and +instantly collapsed again. Mr. Muhlen was there; he bowed rather +distantly. A tremulous pale-faced youngster invited him pressingly to a +drink, and just as the bishop was on the verge of accepting with a view +to getting the victim out of that den of vice, the lad suddenly +remarked: "Excuse me, won't you?" and tottered out of the door. They +were too far gone to be spoken to with any prospects of success. Things +might have been different if the restraining influence of Mr. Freddy +Parker could have made itself felt, but that gentleman was at home, his +lady being not very well. In the Commissioner's absence, Mr. Richards, +the respectable Vice-President, was making his voice heard. Sober or +not, he was certainly articulate and delighted with himself as, +stroking his beard placidly, he roared out above the crowd: + +"I've no use for makeshifts. Honesty is a makeshift. A makeshift for +saving time. Whoever wants to save time is not fit for the society of +gentlemen." + +"Hear, hear!" + +"Call yourself a gentleman?" enquired another. + +"Just a makeshift. You won't hear honesty talked about in the great +periods of the world's history. It's the small tradesman's invention, +is honesty. He hasn't the the brains to earn anything more than three +and a half per cent. That's why he is always in such a hurry to finish +his first little deal and get on with the next one. Else he'd starve. +Hence honesty. Three and a half per cent! Who's going to pick that up? +People who earn three hundred don't cackle about honesty." + +"Call yourself a gentleman? Outside!" + +"I've no use for honesty. It's the small man's flapdoodle, is honesty. +This world isn't made for small men! I am talking to you over there--the +funny little bounder who made the offensive remark just now." + +"Are you? Well, take that!" + +A glass tumbler, which Mr. Richards dodged in quite a professional +manner, came hurtling through the air and missed the bishop's forehead +by about four inches. + +That crowd was past his aid. He turned to go. As he did so, a curious +idea flitted through his brain. This Mr. Richards--was he, perhaps, the +burglar? He was; but Mr. Heard dashed aside the horrible suspicion, +mindful of the mistake he had made about Angelina's character and how +careful one must be in judging of other people. The voice, meanwhile, +pursued him down the stairs. + +"No, gentlemen! I've no use for an honest man. He always lets you down. +Fortunately, he is rather rare--" + +Mr. Heard slept badly that night, for the first time since his arrival +on Nepenthe. It was unbearably hot. And that visit to Mrs. Meadows had +also troubled him a little. + +The Old Town looked different on this occasion. A sullen death-like +stillness, a menacing stagnation, hung about those pink houses. Not a +leaf was astir under the burning sirocco sky. Even old Caterina, when +he saw her, seemed to be afflicted, somehow. + +"SOFFRE, LA SIGNORA," she said. The lady was suffering. + +The bishop would not have recognized his cousin after all those years; +not if he had met her in the street at least. She greeted him +affectionately and they talked for a long time of family matters. It +was true, then. Her husband's leave had been again postponed. Perhaps +she would travel back to England with him, and there await the arrival +of Meadows. She would let him know definitely in a day or two. + +He watched her carefully while she conversed, trying to reconstruct, +out of that woman's face, the childish features he dimly remembered. +They were effaced. He could see what Keith had meant when he described +her as "tailor-made." There was something clear-cut about her, +something not exactly harsh, but savouring of decision. She was plainly +a personality--not an ordinary type. The lines of her face told their +story. They had been hammered into a kind of hard efficiency. But over +that exterior of tranquil self-possession was super-imposed something +else--certain marks of recent trouble. Her eyes looked almost as if she +had been weeping. She made a tremendous show of cheeriness, however, +calling him Tommy as in olden days. + +Just a little headache. This sirocco. It was bad enough when it blew in +the ordinary fashion. But quite intolerable when it hung breathlessly +about the air like this. Mr. Eames--he once called it PLUMBEUS AUSTER. +That meant leaden, didn't it? Everybody had headaches, more or less. + +Was she speaking the truth? The bishop decided that she had an headache +and that this south wind was certainly unendurable. None the less, he +suspected that she was employing the common subterfuge--telling the +truth, but not the whole truth; perhaps not even the main part of it. +She was holding back something. + +"You haven't attended to these roses lately," he said, observing that +the flowers had not been changed and that their fallen petals strewed +the tables. "They looked so fresh when I was here alone the other day." + +"What a dreadful person you are, Tommy, for noticing things. First you +discover my headache, and now those flowers! I see I shall have to be +careful with you. Perhaps you would like to look at my precipice and +tell me if there is anything wrong with that too? You have heard of the +old French lady, I daresay. She ended, you know, in not approving of it +at all. We can have tea when we come back. And after that perhaps you +will let me know what is wrong with baby?" + +"I can tell you that without looking at him. He is teething." + +"Clever boy! As a matter of fact, he isn't. But I had to make some +excuse to the dear Duchess." + +They climbed up the short slope and found themselves looking towards +the sea over the face of a dizzy cliff. A falcon, on their approach, +started with rustle of wings from its ledge and then swayed crazily +over the abyss. Watching this bird, the bishop felt a sudden voice in +his stomach. A sensation of blackness came before his eyes--sky and sea +were merged together--his feet were treading on air. He promptly sat +down. + +"Not an inch nearer!" he declared. "Not for a thousand pounds. If you +go along that edge again, I shall have to look the other way. It makes +me feel empty inside." + +"I'm not in the least giddy," she laughed. "There was an English boy +who threw himself over this cliff for a bet--you have heard the story? +They never found his body. It's a good place for throwing oneself down, +isn't it?" + +She seemed to consider the idea quite seriously. + +"Well?" she pursued. "Have you any fault to find with my precipice?" + +"I have. It ought to be railed in. It is dangerous. What a temptation +this cliff must be to anyone who has an enemy to dispose of! It would +be so simple," he added, laughing. + +"That advantage has never struck me before...." + +These and other things passed through Mr. Heard's mind as he lay in bed +that evening. He came to the conclusion that he could not quite make +his cousin out. Had something upset her? And what did she mean by that +sudden conundrum: + +"Do you know anything, Tommy, about our laws of illegitimacy?" + +"Nothing," he had replied, "except that they are a disgrace to a +civilized country. Everybody knows that." + +She seemed to be disappointed. Perhaps she mistrusted him. The thought +gave him a little pain. He had done nothing to merit mistrust. He was +frank and open himself; he liked others to be the same. + +What was the use of thinking about it? He knew tantalizingly little +about his cousin--nothing but scraps of information gathered from his +mother's letters to him. He would call again in a day or two and make +some definite arrangements about their journey to England. Perhaps he +had talked more dully than usual.... Or could it be the south wind? + +Neither of these explanations was wholly convincing. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XV + + + + + +Nothing was happening. For the first time since many years, the +Nepenthe season threatened to be a failure. It was the dullest spring +on record. And yet there was a quality in that heavy atmosphere which +seemed to threaten mischief. Everybody agreed that it had never been +quite so bad as this. Meanwhile, people yawned. They were bored stiff. +As a source of gossip, those two burglaries were a negligible quantity. +So was the little accident which had just happened to Mr. Keith, who +ruefully declared he had done it on purpose, in order to liven things +up. No one was likely to be taken in by this kind of talk, because the +accident was of an inglorious and even ludicrous kind. + +Being very short-sighted he had managed to stumble backwards, somehow +or other, into a large receptacle of lime which was being slaked for +patching up a wall. Lime, in that condition, is boiling hot. Mr. +Keith's trousers were rather badly scalded. He was sensitive on that +point. He suffered a good deal. People came to express their sympathy. +The pain made him more tedious, long-winded and exhortatory than usual. +At that particular moment Denis was being victimized. He had +thoughtlessly called to express his sympathy, to see those celebrated +cannas, and because he could not bear to be alone with his thoughts +just then. + +"Suffering!" exclaimed Mr. Keith. "That is what you young poets want. +At present you are too unperplexed and glib. Suffering! It would +enlarge your repertoire; it would make you more human, individual, and +truthful. What is the unforgivable sin in poetry? Lack of candour. How +shall there be candour if the poet lacks worldly experience? Suffering! +That is what you people want. It would make men of you." + +Mr. Keith was considerably denser than Count Caloveglia. But even he, +during this oration, could not help noticing that it jarred on his +listener's nerves; there was something wrong, he concluded. + +Denis had not a word to say in reply. As if anyone could be more +suffering than himself! He was full of a dumb ache. He marvelled at +Keith's obtuseness. + +"Come and see my cannas," said the other with a kind of brutal +tactfulness. "There is a curious story attached to them. I must tell it +to you one of these days. It sounds like a fairy tale. You like fairy +tales?" + +"I do," replied Denis. + +"Then we have one point in common. I could listen to them for hours. +There is something eternal about them. If you ever want to get anything +out of me, Denis, tell me a fairy tale." + +"I must remember that," replied Denis with a wan smile. "There is one +thing I should very much like to get out of you; the secret of your +zest in life. You have so many interests. How do you manage it?" + +"Heredity, I suppose. It has given me a kind of violent driving power. +I take things by the throat. Have you ever heard of Thomas Keith, a +soldier in a Highland regiment, who became governor of the Holy City of +Medina? No, I suppose you have not. And yet he must have been a +remarkable man, to obtain this unique position in the world. No +interest in Arabian history? Why not? Well, Thomas Keith--that is my +stock. Pirates and adventurers. Of course I live sensibly. Shall I give +you my recipe for happiness? I find everything useful and nothing +indispensable. I find everything wonderful and nothing miraculous. I +reverence the body. I avoid first causes like the plague. You will find +that a pretty good recipe, Denis." + +The young man wondered whether the prescription would be of any avail +for his particular complaint. + +Then they went into the garden, Mr. Keith hobbling painfully with two +sticks and indulging in very bad language. They paused awhile under +some trellis work covered with a profusion of Japanese convolvuluses, +pale blue, slate colour, rose-tinted, purple, deep red, with white and +coloured bands, a marvellous display of fragile beauty. + +"I have never seen anything like it!" declared Denis. + +"They die away in winter. I get fresh seeds every year from Japan, the +latest varieties. How they cling for support to the wooden framework! +How delicate and fair! One hardly dares to touch them. Are you always +going to be a convolvulus, Denis?" + +"Me? Oh, I see what you mean. Were you never a convolvulus, Mr. Keith?" + +His friend laughed. + +"It must have been a good while ago. You don't like advice, do you? +Have you ever heard of that Sparker affair?" + +"You don't mean to say--" + +"Yes. That was me. That was my little contribution to the gaiety of +University life. So you see I am in the position to give advice to +people like yourself. I think you should cultivate the function of the +real, and try to remain in contact with phenomena. Noumena are bad for +a youngster. But perhaps you are not interested in psychology?" + +"Not exactly, I'm afraid," replied Denis, who was more anxious to see +those cannas. + +"So I perceive. Wouldn't you get more fun out of life if you were? I am +nearly done with psychology now," he added. "It was the Greek +philosophers before then. When I take up a subject this is what I do. I +don't ask what are Aristotle's teachings or relations to his age or to +humanity. That would lead me too far. I ask myself: what has this +fellow got to say to me? To me, you understand. To me." + +"That must simplify matters." + +"It does," replied Keith, quite unaware of the faint tinge of College +irony in the other's words. "Direct experience comes only from life. +But you can get a kind of substitute out of books. Perhaps you are +afraid of them? Take the fellows by the throat! See what they have to +say. Make them disgorge. Get at their facts. Pull them to pieces. I +tell you what, Denis. You must go through a course of Samuel Butler. +You are moving in the same direction; perhaps he may be a warning to +you. I took him up, I remember, during my biological period. He was +exactly like yourself--bewildered by phenomena." + +Denis, meekly resigned, enquired: + +"Was he?" + +"I spent nearly a week over Butler. I found him interesting not for +what he writes, but for what he is. A landmark. Think of when he wrote. +It was an age of giants--Darwin and the rest of them. Their facts were +too much for him; they impinged on some obscure old prejudices of his. +They drove him into a clever perversity of humour. They account for his +cat-like touches, his contrariness, his fondness for scoring off +everybody from the Deity downwards, his premeditated +irresponsibilities, his--" + +"Did he not prove that the Odyssey was written by a woman?" + +"He did. Anything to escape from realities--that was his maxim. He +puzzled his contemporaries. But we can now locate him with absolute +certainty. He personifies the Revolt from Reason. SURTOUT, MON AMI, +POINT DE ZELE. He talks about the Scylla of Atheism and the Charybdis +of Christianity--a state of mind which, by the way, is not conducive to +bold navigation. He was always wavering between the two in an attitude +of suburban defiance, reconciling what is irreconcilable by extracting +funny analogies all round for the edification of "nice people" like +himself. Oh, very English! He did not lack candour or intelligence. Nor +do you. He understood the teachings of the giants. So do you. But they +irked him. To revenge himself he laid penny crackers under their +pedestals. His whole intellectual fortune was spent in buying penny +crackers. There was something cheeky and pre-adolescent about him--a +kind of virginal ferocity. That iridescent charm of sexlessness which +somebody, one of these days, must be good enough to analyse for us! He +lacked the male attributes of humility, reverence and sense of +proportion." + +Mr. Keith paused, but it was only to take breath. + +"Did he?" enquired Denis. "The sense of proportion--" + +"The tail of a cow was just as important to him as the tail of a comet; +more important, if it could be turned into a joke. Look at the back of +his mind and you will always see the same thing: horror of a fact. That +is what lies before you, Denis, if, in a world of facts, you refuse to +assimilate them. They will disagree with you, as they disagreed with +Butler. They will drive you where they drove him--into abstractions. +Others went the same way. The painter Watts, for instance. He also +suffered under the reign of giants. He also took refuge in +abstractions. Faith leading Hope towards Despair. Why don't you write a +book about these things, Denis?" + +"I am going to be an artist." + +"An Artist? That is better than a poet. Verse-making is a little out of +date, is it not? It corresponds to juvenile stages of human +development. Poets are a case of genepistasis. If they would at least +get a new stock of ideas! Their demonology is so hopelessly threadbare. +But why an artist? I think you were made for a bank manager, Denis. +Don't look so surprised. Everybody grows up, you know. Shelley, if he +had lived long enough, would have become a passable gentleman farmer. +You can take my word for that." + +"I suppose I shall have to," replied the young man. + +"Don't take Mr. Keith's word for anything!" said a voice behind his +shoulder. + +It was Don Francesco, who had come upon them unawares. He now removed +his hat and began to mop his forehead and various double chins with a +many-tinted handkerchief as large as a tablecloth. + +"My dear Don Francesco!" said Keith. "You always interrupt me in the +middle of my sermons. What shall we do with you?" + +"Give me something to drink," replied the priest. "Else I shall +evaporate, leaving nothing but a grease stain on this beautiful garden +path." + +"To evaporate," said Keith, with a tinge of sadness in his voice. "What +an ideal resolution!" + +"I'll get some wine out of the house," suggested Denis politely. "But +first of all tell me this. Mr. Keith has been giving me his recipe for +happiness. What is yours?" + +"Happiness is a question of age. The bachelor of forty--he is the happy +man." + +"That does not help me much," said Denis. "But I'll get your wine, all +the same." + +He went. + +"A nice young fellow," observed the priest. "This little accident of +yours," he continued, "does not reflect itself on your face. You always +look like a baby, Keith. What is your secret? I believe you have +concluded a pact with the devil for your soul." + +"To tell you the truth, Don Francesco, he never made me an offer for +it." + +"Sensible devil! He knows he will get it sooner or later for nothing." + +They conversed awhile till Denis returned, bearing sundry bottles and +glasses on a tray. The priest smiled at the sight. Light-hearted +allusions to Ganymede rose to his lips, but were suppressed. He +swallowed down the rising inclination to be classical at the expense of +good taste, and engulfed, on the top of it, as a kind of paperweight, a +vast tumblerful of red Nepenthe wine. The draught instead of cheering +seemed to make him suddenly despondent. He wiped his lips and remarked, +in a grave and almost conscience-stricken manner: + +"I have some unpleasant news for you, gentlemen. The fountain of Saint +Elias has ceased to flow. We heard it this morning from a sailor, an +unusually trustworthy person--a man, I mean, who can be relied upon to +tell the truth when there is nothing to be gained by concealing or +distorting it. The thing must have happened last night. Yes, it has +dried up altogether. What is to be done?" + +"You don't say so," remarked Keith. "This is really interesting! I +thought something was going to happen. I suppose your people are rather +alarmed?" + +Denis interrupted: + +"I don't understand what you are talking about. Why should not a +fountain dry up if it wants to? And what does it matter to anybody?" + +"What does it matter?" echoed the priest. "This is no ordinary +fountain, I am sorry to say. Have you never heard of Beelzebub?" + + + + + + +CHAPTER XVI + + + + + +Now, with regard to fountains, it is to be noted that Nepenthe, an +islet of volcanic stone rising out of the blue Mediterranean, has +never--for all its natural attractions--been renowned for cool springs +and bubbling streamlets. There is, to be sure, a charming couplet in +some old humanist about LYMPHA NEPENTHI; but modern scholars are +disposed to think either that the text is corrupt and that the writer +was picturing an imaginary NYMPHA--some laughing sea-lady--or else that +he merely indulged in one of those poetic flights which are a feature +of the literature of his period. For whatever the cause may be--whether +internal fires have scorched up the natural humours of the soil, or +whether the waters of Nepenthe are of such peculiar heaviness that, +instead of flowing upwards in the shape of fountains, they tumble +downwards into caverns below the sea--the fact remains: Nepenthe is a +waterless land. And this may well be the reason, as several thoughtful +observers have already pointed out, why its wines are so abundant in +quantity, so cheap in price, and of such super-excellent flavour. For +it is a fact conformable to that law of compensation which regulates +all earthly affairs, a fact borne out by the universal experience of +mankind, that God, when He takes away with one hand, gives with the +other. Lack of water, on the face of things, might be deemed a +considerable hardship. There are tracts in Africa where people have +been known to barter wives and children for a cupful of the liquid +element. Of the inhabitants of Nepenthe it must be said to their credit +that they endure their lot with equanimity, and even cheerfulness. +Their wine costs nothing. Why grumble at the inscrutable ways of +Providence? Why be thirsty, why be sober, when you can get as drunk as +a lord for the asking? + +For the rest, there are indications to show that such was not the +original condition of affairs on the island. On the contrary, certain +legends still current among the country-folk lead one to suspect that +fountains once flowed on this arid rock. And more than legends. +Monsignor Perrelli, in his ANTIQUITIES OF NEPENTHE, has gone into the +subject with his usual thoroughness. The reader who takes the trouble +to consult that work will find, in the twenty-sixth chapter of the +third section dealing with the Natural Productions and Water-Supply of +the island, an enumeration of no less than twelve fountains still +flowing during the author's lifetime. Some of them issued high up, in +rocky clefts; others at the middle heights, among vineyards and +orchards; the majority at, or near, the seashore. All of these springs, +he tells us, had the following features in common: they were more or +less hot, unpleasant to the taste, of foetid odour and therefore unfit +for culinary or other common uses. "But let it not be supposed," he +hastens to add, "that they were worthless, inasmuch as there is no such +thing as a worthless gift of Providence. Whoever argues on such +fallacious lines," he says, "will stand convicted both of folly and of +irreverence, seeing that it is the business of mankind, when confronted +by a phenomenon which seems to mock their intelligence, humbly to +ponder the evidence--to investigate causes and ascertain results." In +the present case the utility of the waters, if not for cooking or +drinking then for other specific purposes, had been put to the proof +time out of mind, in an empirical fashion; though it was not till the +reign of the Good Duke Alfred that a series of classical experiments +placed our knowledge of their medicinal properties on a sound +scientific footing. + +In a dissertation attached to this twenty-sixth chapter--a dissertation +larded with illustrative extracts from Galen Celsus, Avicenna, Antonius +Musa, Oribasius Salvus and about fifty others of the ancients who +professed the healing art--Monsignor Perrelli condenses for his readers +the results of these classical experiments; he hands down the names of +these springs and their manifold healing virtues. + +The Fountain of Saint Calogero, described as one of the most famous, +was lukewarm, of ammoniacal and alkaline flavour; a glassful of it +produced the most violent retchings and vomitings. Properly applied, +however, the water had been found to relieve the gout, the discomforts +of child-bearing, leprosy, irritation of the mucous membrane of the +nose, impetigo, strabismus and ophthalmia. If the patient observed care +in his diet, avoiding articles of calorific nature such as fried fish +and boiled lentils, he would find himself greatly benefited by its use +in the case of cornucopic hydrocephalus, flatulence, tympanitis and +varicose veins. It was useful, furthermore, as a cure for the stings of +scorpions and other venomous beasts. + +The so-called "Fountain of Paradise," of nitrous ingredients, spurted +forth with a prodigious hissing noise at a temperature of boiling lead, +from so inaccessible a fissure in the rocks that little had been done +to investigate its peculiar properties. It was held none the less to be +efficacious for the distemper known as PLICA POLONICA, and the peasant +folk, mixing its spray with the acorns on which their pigs were +fattened, had observed that these quadrupeds prospered vastly in health +and appearance. + +The Fountain of Hercules, laxative and tartaric, had proved its +efficacy in cases of enlarged spleen, hare-lip, vertigo, apoplexy, +cachexia, cacodoria, cacochymia senilis and chilblains. It was also +considered to be a sovereign remedy for that distressing and almost +universal complaint, the piles. + +The Fountain known as "La Salina," of arsenical nature, was frequented +chiefly by women who found in its waters an alleviation for troubles +which Monsignor Perrelli does not specify. It was recommended, +moreover, as a sheep-dip. + +The Fountain of the Virgin, purgative and blastopeptic, had given +relief to sufferers from the quartan fever, herpes, elephantiasis, and +to all persons of atrobiliary and lunatick temperament. + +The so-called "Old Fountain," of sub-acidulate and vitriolique flavour, +chalybeate and cataplastic, was renowned for removing stains from +household linen. Taken in minute doses, under medical advice, it gave +relief to patients afflicted with the wolfe, NOLI ME TANGERE, +crudities, Bablyonian itch, globular pemphlegema, fantastical visions, +koliks, asthma and affections of the heart. It also "fortifies the +stomach, comforts the bowels, reduces the gallstone to sand, the sand +to mud, the mud to water--water which can be passed out of the system by +the usual channels." + +The Fountain of Saint Vulcan, anti-blepharous and amygdaloidal, was +charged with such potent minerals that a single spoonful produced a +diarrhoea more distressing to witness than cholera. None the less, +applied externally, it was a wondrous remedy in cases of jaundice, +toothache and open wounds. + +The Fountain of the Capon, sedative and scorbutic, was indicated for +rheumatisms of every kind, not excluding sprained limbs, hydrophobia, +lycanthropy, black choler, oppilations and procrastinating catapepsia. + +The Fountain known as "Spina Santa" was resorted to by all persons +suffering from maladies of the alimentary canal, such as dysentery, +cloven palate, follicular hepatitis, and trabulated hyperaemia of the +Bivonian passage. + +The Fountain of Saint Feto had, by virtue of its smell alone, applied +to her nose as she lay in her coffin, raised from the dead a certain +Anna da Pasto. + +The Fountain popularly called "La Pisciarella" was peculiarly adapted +to those ailments which are incidental to childhood and youth--to wit: +chlorosis, St. Vitus' Dance, constipation, ringworm, otootitis and +other perimingeal disturbances, urticaria, moon-sickness, scrofula and +incontinence of urine. + +Lastly, the Fountain of Saint Elias, sulphurous and saponaceous, was +renowned for its calming influence upon all who suffered from abuse of +lechery or alcohol, or from ingrowing toe-nails. + +This concludes the list. + +"Whence we may safely infer," says Monsignor Perrelli at the +termination of this chapter, "that our island is second to no part of +the globe in this divine gift of salutary waters. And if some should +ask why certain of these springs have recently undergone a marked +diminution in volume we can but answer, simply and truthfully, that +their virtues are no longer in as great demand as formerly. For is it +not a fact that distempers like leprosy and PLICA POLONICA are now +almost unknown on Nepenthe? It follows that the waters adapted to +maladies such as these have performed their appointed task, so far as +this island is concerned. They are doubtless flowing elsewhere, through +mysterious channels of the earth, to carry their health-giving virtues +into fresh regions for the saving of men's lives, to the glory of their +Creator." + +Thus far the learned and ingenious Monsignor Perrelli.... + +It stands to reason that so remarkable a chapter should not have +escaped the notice of the bibliographer who, as already observed, had +been engaged for the last quarter of a century in elucidating the text +of the old historian and enriching it with footnotes for the better +understanding of modern students. In the interval of three and a half +centuries many changes had taken place in the physical aspect of +Nepenthe; among other things, these twelve streams of pestilential +odour had ceased to flow, all save the fountain of Saint Elias; their +very sites had been forgotten, though traditions of their former +existence still lingered among the populace. + +Searching among the archives for whatever might bear on the ancient +history of these springs, Mr. Eames had accumulated abundant material +for footnotes geological, hydrographical and balneo-therapic. +Furthermore, his personal explorations on the island had enabled him to +locate the site of at least four of these old fountains, and to prove +that if some of them had been covered up under the debris of +landslides, the majority had disappeared in consequence of a general +desiccation of the province. + +Lastly and chiefly, his investigations had brought him in contact with +that manuscript, already mentioned, of the Dominican monk Father +Capocchio-a manuscript in which he alighted upon a curious but +troublesome literary discovery anent these very fountains. The author, +a contemporary of Monsignor Perrelli, a hater of Nepenthe, a cleric of +lascivious and lecherous temperament, has in this parchment preserved +what he calls a "popular joke"--a saying which he declares to have been +"common property of the whole country" on the subject of Nepenthe and +its evil-smelling waters. It was one of those scholarly, ponderous and +yet helplessly straightforward jokes of the late Renaissance; a joke to +which Monsignor Perrelli does not allude, both for reasons of local +patriotism and of general decorum; some vulgar dictum, in short, +connected with the name of the patron saint of Nepenthe who, he urged, +was simply a local nature-god, christianized. + +When the bibliographer's eagle eye first fell upon this passage he was +staggered. Then, on reflection, he found himself in an awkward +predicament--his natural modesty as a man contending with a no less +natural and legitimate pride and desire as historian that the fruits of +his labours should not be lost. + +"These," he said, "are the dilemmas which confront the conscientious +annotator." + +What position was he to take up? Should he exclude the miserable joke +altogether from his amended and enlarged edition of Perrelli? He did +not feel himself justified in this line of conduct. Some future +investigator would be sure to unearth it and get the credit for his +industry. Should he re-state it in such terms as to make it palatable +to refined readers, diluting its primary pungency without impairing its +essential signification? He was disposed to adopt that course, but, +unfortunately, all attempts at verbal manipulation failed. Good scholar +as Mr. Eames was, the joke proved to be obdurate, uncompromising; +vainly he wrestled with it; try as he would, it stood out naked and +unashamed, refusing to be either cajoled or bullied into +respectability. There was no circumventing that joke, he decided. +Should he reproduce it there fore IN EXTENSO? Such, after mature +deliberation and not without certain moral misgivings, he conceived to +be his duty towards posterity. Veiled in the obscurity of a learned +tongue, the joke was surreptitiously introduced into the company of a +thousand chaste footnotes that could dispense with such covering +devices. + +Of the subsequent history of the Saint Elias Fountain, which alone +still continued to flow, the bibliographer also learned much--how its +fame had grown in the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries till it +attracted invalids from the most distant provinces, necessitating the +erection of a palatial pump-room for the better accommodations of +visitors; how latterly again the waters had unaccountably fallen into +disfavour with the public. And this, notwithstanding the fact that in +1872 the celebrated Privy Councillor Dr. Saponaro, Director of the +Montecitorio Home for Incurables, had written, at the urgent +solicitation of the Nepenthe Town Authorities (who were alarmed at the +decrease in their bathing-tax revenue) a pamphlet--a pamphlet which, by +the way, cost them a mint of money in view of the author's deserved +reputation as an incorruptible scientist--a pamphlet extolling the +virtue of the spring; proving, by elaborate chemical analysis, that its +ingredients had not only not changed a white since the days of +Monsignor Perrelli but actually improved in quality; and concluding +with the warm recommendation that they were as well adapted as ever for +curing those ailments to which the island population was peculiarly +liable--namely, the consequences of excessive lechery and alcohol, and +the discomfort caused by ingrowing toe-nails. + +The local deputy, Don Guistino Morena, had often promised his +Nepenthean constituents to look into the matter and see that something +was done. But he was a busy man. Up to the present he had apparently +not moved a finger. + +And now this fountain, the last survivor of the twelve health-giving +springs, had suddenly run dry.... + +The bad news spread like wild-fire. It was regarded--for reasons which +will presently appear--as a portent of gravest significance. The clergy +met in unofficial but well-attended conclave to deliberate as to what +attitude should be adopted towards the phenomenon, and what measures +taken to allay popular apprehensions. + +There was gossip, too, at the Club. Most of its members were of the +LAISSEZ FAIRE or even rationalistic type, and one of them--an +unobtrusive Hindu who was suspected of wearing stays--went so far in his +indifference as to declare that the only result of the drying-up of the +fountain would be "one smell less on Nepenthe." A small but compact +minority, however, thought otherwise. Obsessed by vague forebodings, +they found an able and eloquent interpreter of their fears in the +Commissioner who, rather redder in the face than usual, strode fussily +up and down the premises, tugging at his disreputable briar pipe, +drinking the whisky with anybody who cared to pay for it, and declaring +to all and sundry that something must be done. It was his panacea--his +unvarying formula for every emergency, scandalous or otherwise. +Something must be done, he avowed. And from the card-table came two +approving echoes--the voices of Mr. Muhlen and Signor Malipizzo, who did +not care tuppence about the fountain but never lost an opportunity of +expressing their public approval of Mr. Parker's words and actions. + +Something must be done and that soon, for in a few brief hours an +atmosphere of gloom, a sense of impending calamity, had begun to hover +over the sunny island. The natives called to mind, with consternation, +that only once within the memory of their ancestors had the fountain +behaved after this fashion. It was on the eve of that great volcanic +outbreak on the mainland which, by a deadly shower of ashes, destroyed +their crops and impoverished them to such an extent that for three +consecutive months they could barely afford the most unnecessary +luxuries of life. They opined with some show of reason that the little +streamlet had been tempted by ancient and obscure bonds to sympathy to +forsake its old home and creep away, under leagues of shimmering sea, +towards the fiery heart of the volcano; there to undergo some alchemic +process of readjustment, some ordeal, some torrid nuptial rite which +would result in the birth of a flaming monster and the ruin of mankind. + +The terrace was crowded with folk; all eyes were turned toward the +distant fire-mountain. But the volcano had never looked so placid, so +harmless, so attractive; its shapely flanks suffused with the crimson +light of evening, while wreaths of violent vapour ascended, in lazy +intermittent spirals, from the cone. They rose into the zenith +playfully, one after the other, as though the volcano were desirous of +drawing attention to its pretty manners, and were wafted onwards, in +delicate wisps of smoke by the persistent South wind. The clergy now +began to appear in goodly numbers upon the scene. They were in the best +of humours and more ready than usual, it seemed, to take part in any +conversation which might be going on. It had been decided, during their +informal gathering, that the apprehensions of the faithful could not be +better allayed at this preliminary stage than by a mild demonstration +of this kind. Appearances were everything; so they had concluded, not +for the first time. And it was precisely then that the simple-minded +PARROCO, surrounded by a knot of devout believers, pointed to the +playful cloudlets of smoke as they issued from the mouth of the crater +and apposite, but calculated to calm the minds of his hearers. He said +that no rosy schoolboy, smoking his first cigarette, ever looked more +innocent. An ominous, fateful speech! Yet such was his holy simplicity +that he failed to realize its import. He failed to perceive how +inauspicious the metaphor had been till Don Francesco, in a whisper, +pointed out that appearances are apt to be deceptive and, alluding to +certain experiences of his own at the tender age of six years, affirmed +that the smoking of a first cigarette, for all its seeming +harmlessness, is liable to be followed by something in the nature of a +cataclysm. + +There was worse to come. For while the sun yet lingered on the horizon +news of further portents came thick and fast. A plum tree belonging to +a farmer of good standing had unaccountably lost all its leaves. The +Duchess arrived in a state of unusual trepidation, declaring that the +tortoise-shell of her lorgnette gave forth a crackling sound. She +appealed to Don Francesco to explain the meaning of this extraordinary +circumstance; it crackled most distinctly, she declared. Not far from +the little bay where only yesterday the streamlet of Saint Elias still +trickled into the sea, a fisherman had caught a one-eyed lamprey--a +beast, unquestionably, of ill repute. The bibliographer, strolling +about with Denis, recollected that his fox-terrier that very morning +had been violently sick. He seemed to attach no great importance to the +affair; all the same, he said, it was rather queer; dogs are not like +that; now, if it had been Keith.... The baby of the principal grocer +had tumbled downstairs and thereupon proceeded to swallow eight of its +elder brother's marbles which had been carelessly left on the +floor--without experiencing, so far as could be ascertained, any +appreciable injury. A mysterious disease, known as the scabies, had +broken out among the Russian apostles. The yacht of the American +millionaire, Mr. van Koppen, arrived that day; there was nothing +startling in this since he visited the island year after year at the +same season; but why should she collide with a fishing-boat at the +moment of anchoring? + +And from the Old Town came news of a portentous fowl which had suddenly +assumed the plumage of the male sex. It was a hen renowned, hitherto, +for her temperate and normal habits and, as it happened, known by sight +to the local parish priest, who, horrified at the transformation of the +feathered monster and mindful of the Papal Bull NE NIMIS NOCEANT NOBIS +which enjoins upon Christians the duty of destroying all unnatural +productions however generated, incontinently ordered it to be put out +of the way. But the destruction of this androgyne proved an arduous +task. It was reported that the creature fought for its life with the +energy of a demon, crowing vigorously the while and laying, in the very +act of death, an egg--an egg of spheroidal form, bluish in colour, and +apparently hard-boiled--an egg which the Chief Medical Officer of Health +had no great difficulty in recognizing as that of a cockatrice. + +In view of these and other sinister occurrences it is not surprising +that a sense of insecurity should have fallen upon the more credulous +section of the natives. Even sceptical persons thought it rather +provoking on the part of Providence, or whoever managed these things, +that the disquieting of men's minds should take place during this +particular fortnight, the most important of the whole year, midway +between the great feasts of Saint Dodekanus and Saint Eulalia when the +island was crammed with visitors. + +And there followed late at night yet another surprise. Mr. Parker had +been called away from his duties at the Club in hot haste by the news +that his lady was seriously ill. A few days earlier she had been stung +on the lip by a mosquito; no further attention was paid to the +incident, though the disagreeable south wind provoked a rise in +temperature and some discomfort. On this afternoon, however, her face +had suddenly begun to assume strange tints and to swell in wondrous +fashion. It was no already enlarged to twice its natural size and +altogether--in the words of the physician who had been summoned to her +villa--"a thing to see." + +It had always been a thing to see. So, at least, said those who were +privileged to know. There were tropical strains in her blood-strains +from some flowery land in the Caribbean Sea-strains which refused to +mingle in harmonious fashion with the white elements in her ancestry. +She was neither lovely nor lovable, and it was regarded as a kindly +dispensation of Heaven that some malformation of the lower limbs kept +her confined to her boudoir, where no visitors ever called save a few +misguided newcomers to the island who were unaware of her +idiosyncrasies. These idiosyncrasies, due to the enforced inactivity of +her feet, took the form of a grotesque activity of the tongue. Her +infirmity preventing her from learning how things really stood, she let +her phantasy run riot on the occasional reports which reached the +villa; and that phantasy, nourished by lack of physical exercise, +indulged in a love of scandal-mongering which bordered, and sometimes +trespassed, on the pathological. She distilled scandal from every pore, +and in such liberal quantities that even the smiling and good-natured +Don Francesco once spoke of her as "the serpent in the Paradise." But +perhaps he only said that because Madame Parker was not over-fond of +him--his rival the PARROCO being her friend and confessor. + +Such being the case, the prospect of her possible demise was received +with unconcern and even relief by all save a notable number of +tradesmen who prayed fervently for her health because the lady, +presuming on her connection with the official representative of the +friendly state of Nicaragua, had contrived to owe them considerable +sums of money. Knowing the Commissioner as they did, these victims +feared that they would never be able to collect their due in the event +of her death. Hence their prayers for her speedy recovery. + +What would that gentleman do without her? For it was his redeeming +feature that he felt, or professed to feel, affection for this +graceless harridan who was the only person on earth that believed, or +professed to believe, in the integrity of his motives. It is to be +presumed that they saw through each other perfectly; she, at least, may +well have appraised him at his true value. She must have known him for +a dishonest fool. Yet this principle of mutual attachment was never +relinquished. Wiser than her stepbrother, she knew that a house divided +against itself must fall; she therefore approved, forcefully if without +conviction, of his every word and deed. Such approval did him good. It +created a fictitious self-esteem. And this was really rather +unfortunate, since self-esteem, by giving him a sense of importance and +consequence in the world, rendered him a good deal more objectionable +to his fellow-creatures than he need have been. + +Meanwhile she lingered on, and a small group of enquirers were gathered +round the physician who was returning late at night from his third +visit. The moralists among them saw the finger of God in the fact that +her mouth, out of which had proceeded so much harm to strong men and +women, should now be sealed by one of the frailest of His creatures. +The doctor shrugged his shoulders at this kind of talk. He was no +moralizer; he was a true Southerner, an aesthete--one of those who could +appreciate the subtlest beauty of a skin disease. He waxed discursive +on the subject; said that the lady's face reminded him of the rainbow +in a certain picture by a local genius; avowed that there were moments +when even a doctor's hard life had its compensations, and that this was +one of them. + +His enthusiasm carried the audience off their feet. It converted the +sternest preachers into artists. They forgot to talk about moral +lessons. All congratulated the good Aesculapius on his choice of the +medical profession as a career and his luck in beholding a spectacle +such as this; especially when he added, with glowing eloquence, that it +was astonishing how so small an insect, a mere mosquito, should be able +to produce an eruption of this magnitude and in colours, moreover, +which would have made Titian or Peter Paul Rubens burst with envy. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XVII + + + + + +Decidedly, things were happening, as Mr. Heard would have said. + +Strange to say that gentleman himself was probably the only person on +Nepenthe who still remained in ignorance of all these praeternatural +occurrences. In the early morning, after admiring the sea overhung by a +cloudless sky and once more thanking the Duchess in his heart for such +a delightful residence when he might have been boxed up in some stuffy +hotel bedroom, he descended to the beach for his morning bathe. Such +was his custom. The swim did him good, it freshened him up. + +Then back to breakfast and a busy morning's work, to settle up arrears +of correspondence. He wrote to various friends in England; he wrote a +long letter--the third since his arrival--to his mother, telling her of +all such things as might interest her; a nice gossipy letter, full of +information about the entertainments of the foreigners on Nepenthe, +about the obliging natives, the Russian colony, the persistent sirocco, +his own domestic life, his improved health. Much as he liked the place +and people, he said, he expected to be leaving in a week or so. He +concluded with two pages describing his last visit to his cousin. She +was rather poorly or troubled in mind, he thought; he would see her +again ere long. + +And that reminded him--he would write to Mrs. Meadows as well. He did +so, enquiring after her health, asking whether he could be of any +assistance, and promising to call again shortly. "Rather a formal +epistle," he concluded, on reading it through. He was unable to force +the note: he could never write or talk otherwise than he felt, and this +cousin, after all, was rather remote, self-centred, and difficult of +comprehension. "It must go as it is," he decided. "To be quite frank, +she's not exactly encouraging either. Asks such queer questions. What +on earth did she mean by that conundrum about illegitimacy, I wonder?" + +Then luncheon; then a long sleep till tea-time. Everyone slept at this +hour during the days of sirocco-heat. What else was there to do? He had +already learned to look forward to that calm post-prandial hour of +slumber. One owes something to oneself, N'EST CE PAS? as Muhlen had +said. + +On waking he bethought him of an invitation to tea with Madame +Steynlin. He would have listened gladly to her music and her +instructive and charitable talk about Nepenthe and its inhabitants. But +he was afraid of meeting Russians there. The lady seemed to be +specializing in Muscovites just then, and Mr. Heard was not in the +Russian mood. He would take what he called "a day off" from social +duties. + +Slipping his field glasses into his pocket, he rambled upwards by now +familiar paths, past white farmhouses nestling in a riot of greenery; +till he reached the barer regions. The vines were more sparsely +cultivated here, and soon all trace of human handcraft was at an end. +He found himself on a little plateau of volcanic cinders and +lava-blocks. The spare grasses and flowers that grew between fuliginous +masses of stone were already losing their bright enamel under the +withering heat; a peculiar odour, acrid but stimulating to the +nostrils, rose from the parched ground. Here he rested awhile. He +scanned the landscape through his glasses--a wine-coloured sea at his +feet, flecked with sailing boats innumerable; confronting him from the +volcano whose playful antics were even then attracting the attention of +a crowded Piazza. And his eye roved along the serrated contours of the +mainland, its undulating shore-line, its distant peaks throbbing in the +sunset glow; they rested upon many villages, coral-tinted specks of +light, so far away they seemed to belong to another world. It was a +pleasure to breathe on these aerial heights, surrounded by sky and sea; +to survey the world as a bird might survey it. Like floating in air.... + +He sat and smoked and pondered. He tried to get himself into +perspective. "I must straighten myself out," he thought. Assuredly it +was a restful place, this Nepenthe, abounding in kindly people; his +affection for it grew with every day. Rest without; but where was that +old rest within, that sense of plain tasks plainly to be performed, of +tangible duty? Whither had it gone? Alien influences were at work upon +him. Something new had insinuated itself into his blood, some demon of +doubt and disquiet which threatened his old-established conceptions. +Whence came it? The effect of changed environment--new friends, new +food, new habits? The unaccustomed leisure which gave him, for the +first time, a chance of thinking about non-professional matters? The +south wind acting on his still weakened health? All these together? Or +had he reached an epoch in his development, the termination of one of +those definite life--periods when all men worthy of the name pass +through some cleansing process of spiritual desquamation, and slip +their outworn weeds of thought and feeling? + +Whatever it was he seemed to be no longer his own master, as in former +days. Fate had caused his feet to stray towards something new--something +alarming. He was poised, as it were, on the brink of a gulf. Or rather, +it was as if that old mind of his, like a boat sailing hitherto briskly +before the wind, had suddenly encountered a bank of calm, of utter and +ominous calm; it was a thing spell-bound; a toy of circumstances beyond +human control. The canvas hung in the stagnant air. From which quarter +would the quickening breeze arrive? Whither would it bring him? + +And his glance fell upon a slender coquettish vessel, a new-comer, +lying in the sunny harbour under the cliff. He knew it from hearsay. It +was the FLUTTERBY, van Koppen's yacht. He recollected all he had ever +heard about the millionaire; he tried to conjure up some idea of his +features and habits from gossip overheard at odd moments. + +This man, he concluded, must be intelligent beyond ordinary standards. +It would be worth while making his acquaintance. America is notoriously +the land of youthful precocity. But it is not every American who, as a +stripling of fourteen summers, puzzling in callow boyish perplexity +upon the thousand ills that afflict mankind and burning with desire for +their betterment, makes a discovery in Malthusian methods destined to +convulse the trade and the social life of a continent. Not everybody is +like young Koppen--he attached a van to his name on reaching his +seventy-fifth million--who, possessed at that time of barely three +dollars in the world and not even the shadow of a moustache, had both +the wit to realize the hygienic importance of a certain type of goods +and the pertinacity to insist on cheapening their price, in the +interest of public health, to such an extent that--to quote from +subsequent advertisements--they should be "within reach of the humblest +home." It is not everybody--no, not every American--who, after +revolutionizing the technique of manufacture and shattering the Paris +monopoly, dares boldly to advertise the improved article across the +length and breadth of the land, and to thrust his commodity upon a +reluctant market in the teeth of popular prejudice and commercial +rivalry. Van Koppen had done all this. And it was noted that he had +done it without ever for a moment losing sight of his dual +aim--mercantile and philanthropic; for if he was a humanitarian by +natural disposition, he became what he called "a tradesman by force of +circumstance"--and not a bad tradesman, either. He had done all this and +more. Unlike most self-made men who remain yoked like oxen to their +sordid affairs (in harness, they aptly call it) he had been shrewd +enough to retire from business in the heyday of his age, on a +relatively modest competence of fifteen million dollars a year. He was +spending his time at present in the gratification of personal whims, +and leaving the remaining millions to be picked up by whoever cared to +take the trouble. Manifestly an unusual type of millionaire--this man +who had lived down half a century of obloquy and was now hailed, in +well-informed circles, as the saviour of his country. + +Nor was this all. Van Koppen was described as a brisk, genial, +talkative old fellow, rather fat, with a clear complexion, sound teeth, +shrubby grey beard, a twang barely sufficient to authenticate his +transatlantic descent, and the digestion of a boa-constrictor. He was +tremendously fond of buttered tea-cakes--so the Duchess said; a man who, +in the words of Madame Steynlin, "really appreciated good music" and +who, as the PARROCO never ceased to declare, could be relied on to give +a handsome contribution towards the funds for supporting the poor and +repairing a decrepit parish organ. (The parish poor were never in such +dire distress, the parish organ never so hopelessly deranged, as during +that annual week when the FLUTTERBY rode at anchor.) + +In fact there was no doubt about it: van Koppen had the gifts of making +himself beloved. But nobody's company was more markedly to his taste +than that of Count Caloveglia. The two old men spent hours together in +Caloveglia's shady courtyard, eating candied fruits, sipping home-made +liqueurs of peaches or mountain-herbs and talking--ever talking. Between +them there existed some strong and strange bond of friendship or +interest. Speculation was rife as to its origin, its meaning, its end. + +What was all the talk about? + +Andrea, the devoted retainer, however artfully approached on the +subject, was ambiguous to a distressing degree. It was understood, none +the less, that Count Caloveglia was perhaps of use to the other in the +accumulation of classical relics which--the Italian Government +forbidding the export of antique works of art--were smuggled at +night-time on board the FLUTTERBY to be incorporated in a magnificent +museum somewhere out West, a museum which was destined to be presented +by van Koppen as a gift to the great American people. Again, it might +be inferred that these two elderly gentlemen, choice representatives of +two conflicting civilizations, widely experienced and profoundly +versed, each in his own way, in the knowledge of mankind, took a +sincere and childlike pleasure in one another's society, going over +past times and anxious, to the very end of life, to add something fresh +to their store of learning. + +Both these explanations were sufficiently plausible to be straightway +dismissed by the majority as inadequate to account for the phenomenon. +They inclined, rather, to adopt an alternative and alluring theory +propounded by the Commissioner's lady. This theory laid it down that +the American was bargaining for the Count's daughter, a pretty girl +whom the old ruffian had shut up in a convent somewhere in anticipation +of the day when a purchaser, rich enough to content his inordinate lust +for gold, should present himself. Van Koppen was that purchaser. They +had now been haggling, she said, for two or three years; a DENOUEMENT +might be expected at any moment. If the Count's avarice could be +appeased the unhappy child might expect to find herself, with as little +delay as possible, an inmate of the floating harem on board the +FLUTTERBY. + +No visitor was safe from her lively tongue, and alas, certain little +details, insignificant in themselves, gave ground for the ungenerous +hypothesis that van Koppen, like all the rest of them, had a cloven +hoof. There was the usual "dark side" to this otherwise charming and +profitable stranger, the usual mystery, the usual fly in the ointment. +In the first place it was a singular fact, much commented on, that +nobody had ever been invited on board the yacht. That alone was +suspicious. IF YOU WANT TO GET ANYTHING OUT OF OLD KOPPEN--so ran a +local saying--DON'T PROPOSE A VISIT TO THE FLUTTERBY. More curious still +was the circumstance that nobody, save the owner and certain bearded +venerables of the crew, had ever been known to land on the island. How +about the other passengers? Who were they? The millionaire never so +much as mentioned their existence. It was surmised, accordingly, that +he voyaged over the seas with a bevy of light-hearted nymphs; a +disreputable mode of conduct for a man of his advanced years, and all +the more aggravating to other people since, like a crafty and jealous +old sultan, he screened them from public view. Impropriety could be +overlooked--it could pass, where a millionaire was concerned, under the +heading of unconventionality; but such glaring selfishness might end in +being fatal to his reputation. + +Confirmatory evidence of this scandalous state of affairs was obtained, +one sunny morning, in the most unexpected fashion. A fisherman named +Luigi, paddling about the stern of the FLUTTERBY where, in consequence +of the kitchen refuse thrown overboard, marine beasts of every shape +and kind were wont to congregate, cast down his spear at what looked +like a splendid caerulean flat-fish of uncommon size and brilliance. +The creature shivered and collapsed at that contact in the most +unnatural, unfishlike manner; and Luigi drew up, to his amazement, a +fragment of a lady's dress--to wit, a short length of sky-blue CREPE DE +CHINE. Bitterly disappointed, he nevertheless took the matter with the +characteristic Southern philosophy. "This will do for my little +Annarella," he decided. And doubtless the child, arrayed in these +celestial tints, would have been the envy of all her girl companions at +the next festival of the patron saint b for the fact that Mr. Freddy +Parker was strolling on the beach at the very moment of the man's +return to land. By a rare piece of good luck, as he himself phrased it, +his eye fell upon the dripping fabric; by a stroke of intuition not +rare but unique, he divined its worth as a sociological document. +Promising the man a reasonable sum of money (the Commissioner happened +to have no loose change in his pocket just then) he carried the +incrimination morsel in triumph to the Residency, where it was +displayed by his lady, to all and sundry, in corroboration of her +theory. + +"That settles it," she used to say. "Unless indeed he dresses up his +cabin-boy as a girl, and in that case...." + +Mr. Heard, reposing on the rough pumiceous ground with his eye fixed +upon the naughty FLUTTERBY whose virginal whiteness, with declining +day, had assumed a tell-tale crimson blush, pieced together these and +sundry other little bits of information. They made him more than +usually thoughtful; they chimed in with his momentary mood of +self-analysis. + +One thing was dead certain. To circumnavigate the globe in the arms of +a dozen chorus-girls was not his ideal. He was not built on those +lines. He purposed, God Willing, to spend the evening of his days in +another and more respectable manner. A vision arose before his +imagination--a vision of a peaceful homestead among the green lanes of +England, where he would lead a life of study and of kindly, +unostentatious acts, with family and friends; old friends of College +days, and London days, and African days; new friends from among the +rising generation--straightforward and decent-minded youngsters, whom he +would take to his heart like a father. + +Why could not van Koppen see the beauty of such dreamings? + +And yet, he argued, if the man does seclude them in this +fashion--supposing they really exist--who can blame him? No woman is safe +on Nepenthe with persons like Muhlen about. From chance meetings in the +street, from stray conversations overheard, he had been led to take an +unreasoning dislike to this foreigner, whose attitude towards the +gentle sex struck him as that of a cur. Muhlen, if the yacht were his, +would flaunt these ladies about the streets. The American, in keeping +them secluded on board, betrayed a sense of shame, almost of delicacy; +a sense of his obligations towards society which, so far as it went, +was rather a laudable trait of character than otherwise. + +And then--the difference between himself and the millionaire in life, +training, antecedents! A career such as van Koppen's called for +qualities different, often actually antagonistic, to his own. You could +not possibly expect to find in a successful American merchant those +features which go to form a successful English ecclesiastic. Certain +human attributes were mutually exclusive--avarice and generosity, for +instance; others no doubt mysteriously but inextricably intertwined. A +man was an individual; he could not be divided or taken to pieces; he +could not be expected to possess virtues incompatible with the rest of +his mental equipment, however desirable such virtues might be. Who +knows? Van Koppen's doubtful acts might be an unavoidable expression of +his personality, an integral part of that nature under whose ferocious +stimulus he had climbed to his present enviable position. And Mr. Heard +was both shocked and amused to reflect that but for the co-operation of +certain coarse organic impulses to which these Nepenthe legends +testified, the millionaire might never have been able to acquire the +proud title of "Saviour of his Country." + +"That's queer," he mused. "It never struck me before. Shows how careful +one must be. Dear me! Perhaps the ladies have inevitable organic +impulses of a corresponding kind. Decidedly queer. H'm. Ha. Now I +wonder.... And perhaps, if the truth were known, these young persons +are having quite a good time of it--" + +He paused abruptly in his reflections. He had caught himself in the +act; in the very act of condoning vice. Mr. Thomas Heard was seriously +concerned. + +Something was wrong, he concluded. He would never have argued on +similar lines a short time ago. This downright sympathy with sinners, +what did it portend? Did it betray a lapse from his old-established +principles, a waning of his respect for traditional morality? Was he +becoming a sinner himself? + +Thomas--the doubting apostle. He wondered whether there was anything in +a name. + +Then he called to mind how he had approved--yes, almost approved--of Don +Francesco's deplorable act of familiarity towards the little serving +maid. An absurdly small matter, but symptomatic. Things like that had +happened in Africa lately. He remembered various instances where he had +intervened on behalf of the natives, despite the murmured protests of +the missionaries. They were such laughing, good-natured animals--so fine +and healthy! What was it, this excessive love of erring humanity, and +whither trending? Mr. Heard began to vex his soul to stray about in a +maze of doubts. It was so miserably complex, this old, old problem of +right and wrong; so unreasonably many-sided. Anon, he pulled himself +together with characteristic bluntness. + +"The whole question," he concluded, "is plain as a pikestaff. Am I +becoming more of a Christian, or less?" + +As though to learn an answer to his riddle he gazed fro he eyrie over +the wide horizon, upon leagues of sea rising upward to blend their +essence, under the magic touch of evening, with the purple dome +overhead. + +The elements, as is their wont upon such occasions, gave forth no clear +reply. + +None the less, while the moist south wind, shorn of the sting of +midday, relaxed his pores and passed over his cheek like a warm caress, +there exhaled from those limitless spaces a sense of joyous +amplitude--of freedom and exhilaration. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XVIII + + + + + +And now, in the sunlit hour of dawn, he was bathing again. An excellent +habit. It did him good, this physical contact with nature. Africa had +weakened his constitution. Nepenthe made him feel younger once +more--capable of fun and mischief. The muscles were acquiring a fresh +tone, that old zest of life was coming back to him. His health, without +a shadow of doubt, had greatly improved. + +While disporting himself in amphibious joy among the tepid waves he +seemed to cast off that sense of unease which had pursued him of late. +It was good to inhale the harsh salty savour--to submit himself to these +calming voices--to float, like a careless Leviathan, in the blue +immensity; good to be alive, simply alive. + +Another hot and clammy day was in store for the island. No matter. This +sirocco, of which older inhabitants might well complain, had so far +exerted no baleful influence upon him. Quite the reverse. Under its +tender moistening touch his frame, desiccated in the tropics, seemed to +open out, even as a withered flower uncloses its petals in water. In +Africa all this thoughts and energies had been concentrated upon a +single point. Here he expanded. New interests, new sensations, seemed +to lie in wait for him. Never had he felt so alert, so responsive to +spiritual impressions, so appreciative of natural beauty. + +Lying in motionless ecstasy on the buoyant element he watched the mists +of morning as they soared into the air. Reluctantly, with imperceptible +movement, they detached themselves from their watery home; they +clambered aloft in spectral companies, drawn skyward, as by some +beckoning hand, under the stealthy compulsion of the sun. They crept +against the tawny precipices, clinging to their pinnacles like shreds +of pallid gauze, and nestling demurely among dank clefts where +something of the mystery of night still lingered. It was a procession +of dainty shapes wreathing themselves into gracious attitudes; +mounting--ever mounting. As he beheld their filmy draperies that swayed +phantom-like among the crags overhead, he understood those pagan minds +of olden days for whom such wavering exhalations were none other than +sea-nymphs, Atlantides, offspring of some mild-eyed god of Ocean rising +to greet their playfellows, the Oreads, on the hills. + +The wildest stretch of Nepenthe coast-line lay before him. Its profile +suggested not so much the operation of terrestrial forces as a +convulses and calcined lunar landscape--the handiwork of some demon in +delirium. Gazing landwards, nothing met his eye save jagged precipices +of fearful height, tormented rifts and gulleys scorched by fires of old +into fantastic shapes, and descending confusedly to where the water +slept in monster-haunted caverns. + +Not a sign of humanity was visible save one white villa, far away. It +was perched on a promontory of heliotrope-tinted trachyte; struck by +the morning beams it flashed and glowed like a jewel in the sunshine. +He knew the place: Madame Steynlin's abode. The sight of it reminded +him of a promise to attend her picnic next week; all Nepenthe would be +invited, after the feast of Saint Eulalia. And hard by the shore, at +its foot, he discerned certain minute scarlet specks. + +What could they be? + +Why, of course! They were recognizable, even at this distance, as the +blouses of the Sacred Sixty-three, who frequented this somewhat public +spot for bathing purposes, blandly indifferent, or resigned, to the +gaze of inquisitive onlookers. Mr. Heard, among others, had witnessed +their aquatic diversions. + +The Messiah was hindered by age and growing infirmities from taking +part in the proceedings; moreover, he had been sickening lately, it was +said, for some new Revelation--a Revelation of which the island was to +become cognizant that very morning. But others of the Muscovite band +were fond of congregating at this spot and hour for their lustral +summer rites--white-skinned lads and lasses, matrons and reverent +elders, all in a state of Adamitic nudity, splashing about the water of +this sunny cover, devouring raw fish and crabs after the manner of the +fabled Ichthyophagi, laughing, kissing, saying nice things about God, +and combing out each other's long tow-coloured hair. Madame Steynlin, a +spectator by necessity if not deliberate choice of these patriarchal +frolics, disdained to controvert certain frivolous folk who resorted to +the same beach to gratify a morbid curiosity, under the pretext that it +was a delectable entertainment and one of the sights of Nepenthe. She +disdained, nowadays. It had not ever been thus. Things were different +before Peter the Great came upon the scene. In those unregenerate times +her Lutheran upbringing condemned, in no measured terms, this frank +exhibition of animal nature. A warm friendship with the good-looking +apostle had now opened her eyes to the mystic sense of what went on. +Earthly love had given an unearthly tinge to her mind. The veil had +fallen; she saw through external appearances into the Symbolic Beyond. +Deeply penetrated of its inner meaning, she would say that the +spectacle called up visions of the Age of Innocence, when the world was +young.... + +An elegant rowing-boat suddenly swept into Mr. Heard's field of vision. +It had approached from round the entrance of the small bay and was +already within a few yards ere he caught sight of it. He dived +skilfully, and on returning to the surface beheld Mr. Keith smiling +upon him, with owlish benevolence, through his spectacles. + +"How pretty you look," he said. "Just like a mermaid that's lost its +tail." + +"You flatter me!" + +"Not at all. Climb in and I'll take you for a row." + +"Hadn't I better get some clothes on?" + +"As you please. We can take you off that boulder if you want to dress." + +"You're very kind." + +Kind indeed. To admit a friend into one of his yachts or rowing-boats +was an act of rare self-sacrifice on the part of Mr. Keith, who +maintained that no vessel, not even an Atlantic liner, was large enough +for more than one passenger. + +"You are comfortable in here," the bishop remarked, as he presently +stepped on board and looked around him. "Cleopatra's barge must have +been something like this." + +"There will be no breeze worth talking about all day. We must row." + +An awning of red silk screened off the rays of the sun; the +appointments of the small boat--the polished wood of rare texture, +morocco leather cushions, and elaborate fittings--bespoke the taste or +at least the income of a Sybarite. A grizzly brown sailor and his +curly-pated son were the oarsmen; in the stern sat a couple of Keith's +attendants, whom Mr. Heard might have mistaken for two Green genii but +for the fact that between them lay an enormous and hideously modern +receptacle of wicker-work which impaired the illusion. It troubled the +bishop, both by reason of its incongruity and because he could not +divine what its purpose might be, till Keith solved the mystery by +saying: + +"I thought I would like to see for myself about this fountain of Saint +Elias and, incidentally, enjoy a little al fresco luncheon by the +shore. Now I wonder whether there will be enough food for both of us in +the basket?" + +"That thing? Dear me. I thought it might contain a cottage piano. What +fountain?" + +"You haven't heard anything? Nothing at all?" + +He outlined the events of the preceding day. + +"What?" he continued. "They didn't even tell you about Miss +Wilberforce? Well, whether she thought it was her birthday, or whether +all these omens upset her nerves--Oh, the usual thing, only rather +more so. Decidedly more so. It was late at night, you see, and she +insisted on singing 'Auld Lang Syne,' and even on translating it, for +the benefit of the constable who arrested her, into her own particular +brand of Italian. In fact, there was a good deal of trouble, till +somebody let down a blanket from a window. It happened to be a new +policeman unaccustomed to her ways, and he has had a bad shock. His +wife complained to the judge, who set round word to me this morning +that she was in the lock-up." + +"In prison. An English lady!" + +"It is not the first time by any means. But I feel exactly as you do +about it. I've bailed her out, and stopped his mouth with a fifty-franc +note. Please keep this between ourselves." + +Mr. Heard was not pleased to learn this incident. It seemed a +discordant note on Nepenthe. He observed: + +"Miss Wilberforce apparently can be relied upon to create a diversion +of a scandalous nature. I wish I could do something to help such a poor +creature." + +"The dear lady! I don't know what we should do without her. By the way, +have you seen Denis lately? We must be friendly to that young fellow, +Heard. I don't think he is altogether happy in this clear pagan light. +He seems to be oppressed about something. What do you make of him?" + +"Of Denis? Nothing at all." + +"You interest me." + +"How so?" + +"Because your values appear to be perverted. Your heart remains dead to +Denis, but goes out to a worthless and incurable drunkard. The one is +supremely happy. The other plainly troubled in mind. It leaves you +cold. How do you explain it?" + +Mr. Heard began to wonder. Were his values really vitiated? Had he done +anything to justify self-reproach? He remembered meeting Denis lately, +in a fit of dejection, as it seemed; they had passed each other with a +few words of greeting. Perhaps he might have been a little more +friendly. Well, he would atone for it on the next occasion. He asked: + +"Has he no relations?" + +"A mother, at present in Florence. There have been misunderstandings, I +suspect. He has probably found her out, like he found out our Duchess; +like he will find out both you and me, if we give him the chance. +Meanwhile he gropes about in a wistful fashion, trying to carve out a +scheme of life for himself and to learn something from al lof us. What +can a person of that kind have in common with a mother of any kind?" + +"Everything," said Mr. Heard enthusiastically. + +"Nothing at all. You are thinking of your own mother. You forget that +you never see her. Any son can live with any mother under those +conditions. The fact remains: nobody can misunderstand a boy like his +own mother. Look around you, and see if it is not true! Honour thy +father and thy mother. Perhaps. But we must civilize our mothers before +we can expect any rational companionship between them and their sons. +Girls are different. They are more cynical and less idealistic, they +can put up with mothers, they can laugh at them. I am speaking in a +general way. Of course there are shining exceptions. Mothers at present +can bring children into the world, but this performance is apt to mark +the end of their capacities. They can't even attend to the elementary +animal requirements of their offspring. It is quite surprising how many +children survive in spite of their mothers. Ask any doctor." + +"If that is the case there must be something wrong with our social +system. You may be sure that the female cat or canary bird is just as +efficient in her department as the male in his. Speaking from my own +experience among the London poor, I should say that the father is often +a mere parasite on his wifo and children--" + +"We may both of us be right. But I wish you would take Denis in hand a +little. Will you? Perhaps you misread his character. He may be afraid +of you." + +"Have you any particular reason--?" + +"I don't like his looks. There is something tragic about him lately." + +Mr. Heard was slightly nettled. After all, he was not on Nepenthe for +the purpose of doling out consolations to melancholy undergraduates. + +"I should be sorry to think myself singled out for his distrust," he +replied. "At the same time, I don't notice that he has much to say to +certain other people--to the Commissioner, for instance, or to Mr. +Muhlen." + +"Muhlen? He is quite right to leave Muhlen alone. Quite right. It +proves his intuition. I have learnt all about that man. A beastly +character. He has a bad record. Lives on blackmail and women. His real +name is Retlow." + +And Mr. Keith lit a cigar, as though to dismiss the subject. + +"Retlow, you say? That's queer." + +The name sounded familiar to the bishop. Where had he heard it before? +He racked his memory. Where could it have been? Retlow.... It was +not a common name. Long ago, obviously. Where? + +In African days, or earlier? + +His searchings were interrupted by the voice of the old boatman who, +relinquishing an oar, pointed to a swart precipice near at hand and +said in tolerable English (the older generation of natives all spoke +English--their children were learning Russian): + +"The suicides' rock, gentlemens. Ah! Many is the poor Christian I have +pick up there. He throw down hisself. Him dead. Often in small pieces. +Here blood. Here brain. Here leg and boot. Here finger. Ah! The poor +Chiristian. That so, gentlemens." + +The bishop scanned with a shudder this frowning cliff of basalt, and +turned to address his companion. + +"Do people really throw themselves over here?" + +"Very few. Not more than three or four in a season, I'm told. The local +suicides, as a rule, are not as spectacular as they might be +considering the landscape. They shoot themselves or take poison, which +shows a certain consideration for other people. It is not a pleasant +job, you know, to row to this remote spot and scramble about the cliff +at the risk of a broken neck, collecting shattered fragments of +humanity into a potato sack." + +"Not at all pleasant!" + +"As compared with England," Keith pursued, "life here is intense, +palpitating, dramatic--a kind of blood-curdling farce full of +irresponsible crimes and improbable consequences. The soil is saturated +with blood. People are always killing themselves or each other for +motives which, to an Englishman, are altogether outside the range of +comprehensibility. Shall I tell you about one of our most interesting +cases? I happen to be on the island at the time. There was a young +fellow here--an agreeable young fellow--an artist; he was rich; he took a +villa, and painted. We all liked him. Then, by degrees, he became +secretive and moody. Said he was studying mechanics. He told me himself +that much as he liked landscape painting he thought an artist--a real +artist, he said--ought to be versed in ancillary sciences; in +fortification, wood-carving, architecture, and so on. Leonardo da +Vinci, you know. Well, one day they could not get into his bedroom. +They broke open his door and discovered that he had constructed a +perfectly-formed guillotine; the knife had fallen; his head lay on one +side and his body on the other. You may well be surprised. I went +carefully into that case. He was in the best of health, with a +creditable artistic record behind him. He had no troubles, financial or +domestic." + +"Then what on earth--?" + +"The scenery of Nepenthe. It got on his nerves; it unstrung him. Does +that surprise you too? Don't you feel its effect upon yourself? The +bland winds, the sea shining in velvety depths as though filled with +some electric fluid, the riot of vegetation, these extravagant cliffs +that change colour with every hour of the day? Look at that peak +yonder--is it not almost transparent, like some crystal of amethyst? +This coast-line alone--the sheer effrontery of its mineral charm--might +affect some natures to such an extent as to dislocate their stability. +Northern minds seem to become fluid here, impressionable, unstable, +unbalanced--what you please. THere is something in the brightness of +this spot which decomposes their old particles and arranges them into +fresh and unexpected patterns. That is what people mean when they say +that they 'diswcover' themselves here. You discover a mechanism, you +know, when you take it to pieces. You catch my meaning?" + +"I catch it." + +He nodded. He understood perfectly. Some analogous process was going on +within him at that moment. He, too, was discovering himself. + +"Have you discovered yourself, Keith?" + +"Yes, by other methods, elsewhere. I am only here for a short time in +the Spring and another ten days in September. That is hardly enough, +even supposing I were the sort of person to be accessible to these +externals. I have passed that stage. I am too old, too unemotional. I +prefer devouring a partridge EN CASSEROLE or listening to your +conversation ("listening to my conversation!" thought Mr. Heard) to all +the scenery in the world But I watch other people; I make it my +business to study their condition; I put myself in their places. JE +CONSTATE, as the French say. To them, the landscape of Nepenthe is +alive, often malignantly alive. They do what you cannot so effectually +do in the North; they humanize it, identifying its various aspects with +their own moods, its features with their own traditions." + +Mr. Heard thought of those tremendous mists he had seen only an hour +ago--the daughters of old Ocean. + +"They humanize it," he echoed. "The mythopoetic faculty!" + +"Perhaps this capacity of Southern scenery to bear a mortal +interpretation accounts for the anthropomorphic deities of classical +days. I often think it does. Even we moderns are unaccountably moved by +its varying facets which act sometimes as an aphrodisiac, and sometimes +by their very perfection, their discouraging spell, their insolent +beauty, suggest the hopelessness of all human endeavour.... Denis! I +should think him capable of anything, just now. Do you imagine a person +like this could possibly remain insensible to the beguiling influence +of these surroundings?" + +"I never thought about him." + +"Really? You interest me, Heard. If you deny the susceptibility of a +temperament like his, you deny the whole operation of externals upon +character and action. You deny, for example, the success of the Roman +Catholic Church which relies, for its moral effects, upon such optic +appeals to the senses, and upon the ease with which transitory feelings +can be transmuted into axioms of conduct. Do you deny this?" + +"Not at all. I have seen enough of their system to realize its extreme +simplicity." + +"And then think of the peculiar history of this island and its +situation as a converging-point for men of every race and every creed. +All these things stimulate to rapid nervous discharges; that is, to +inconsidered, foolish actions--" + +"All fools!" the boatman interrupted. "All foreigners! We people don't +do these things. Only dam-fool foreigners. That so, gentlemens. They +have trouble themselves, then they come to this rock and, boom! make +trouble for their friends." + +"Boom!" echoed his son, who had apparently caught the drift of the old +man's speech. Whereat the two Greek genii in the stern laughed +immoderately; knowing, as they did, that the boy had not the slightest +idea of what his father was talking about. + +"Boom!" they repeated, in derisive chorus. + +At that moment all the occupants of the boat pricked up their ears. A +sound had reached them, a similar sound--a sound that recalled the +distant firing of a big gun. Boom! It reverberated among the rocks. The +rowers dropped their oars. Everyone listened. + +The sound came again. This time there was no question as to its origin. +It was artillery, beyond a doubt. + +The old sailor had grown preternaturally grave. + +"IL CANNONE DEL DUCA," he said. + +The cannon of the Good Duke Alfred, never used save on urgent or solemn +occasions, was being discharged. + +Then the boatman made another remark, in Italian, to Keith. + +"What does he say?" asked Mr. Heard. + +"He thinks they must be calling out the militia." + +Something was very wrong, up yonder, on the market-place. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XIX + + + + + +The cannon, to be hereinafter described, is not the sole surviving +relic of the Good Duke's rule. Turn where you please on this island +domain, memories of that charming and incisive personality will meet +your eye and ear; memories in stone-schools, convents, decayed castles +and bathing chalets; memories in the spoken word--proverbs attributed to +him, legends and traditions of his sagacity that still linger among the +populace. IN THE DAYS OF THE DUKE: so runs a local saying, much as we +speak of the "good old times." His amiable laughter-loving ghost +pervades the capital to this hour. His pleasantries still resound among +those crumbling theatres and galleries. That gleeful deviltry of his, +compounded of blood and sunshine, is the epitome of Nepenthe. He is the +scarlet thread running through its annals. An incarnation of all that +was best in the age he identified, for wellnigh half a century, his +interests with those of his faithful subjects. + +He meditated no conquests. It sufficed him to gain and to retain the +affection of men in whose eyes he was not so much a prince, a feudal +lord, as an indulgent and doting father. He was the ideal despot, a man +of wide culture and simple tastes. "A smile," he used to say, "will +sway the Universe." Simplicity he declared to be the keynote of his +nature, the guiding motive of his governance. In exemplification +whereof he would point to his method of collecting taxes--a marvel of +simplicity. Each citizen paid what he liked. If the sum proved +insufficient he was apprised of the fact next morning by having his +left hand amputated; a second error of judgment--it happened rather +seldom--was rectified by the mutilation of the remaining member. "Never +argue with inferiors," was one of His Highness's most original and +pregnant remarks, and it was observed that, whether he condescended to +argue or not, he generally gained his point without undue loss of time. + +"It's so simple," he would say to those perplexed potentates who +flocked to him from the mainland for advice on administrative +questions. "So simple! One knock to each nair. And keep smiling." + +It was the Good Duke Alfred who, with a shrewd eye to the future +prosperity of his dominions, made the first practical experiments with +those hot mineral springs--those healing waters whose virtues, up till +then, had been unaccountable neglected. Realizing their curative +possibilities, he selected fifty of the oldest and wisest of his Privy +Councillors to undergo a variety of hydro-thermal tests on their +bodies, internal and external. Seven of these gentlemen had the good +luck to survive the treatment. They received the Order of the Golden +Vine, a coveted distinction. The remaining forty-three, what was left +of them, were cremated at night-time and posthumously ennobled. + +He was the author of some mighty fine dissertations on falconry, +dancing and architecture. He wrote furthermore, in the flamboyant style +of his period, two dozen pastoral plays, as well as a goodly number of +verses addressed, for the most part, to ladies of his Court--a Court +which was thronged with poets, wits, philosophers and noble women. The +island was a gay place in those days! There was always something doing. +His Highness had a trick of casting favourites into dungeons, and +concubines into the sea, that endeared him to his various legitimate +spouses; and the rapidity with which these self-same spouses were +beheaded one after the other, to make room for what he mirthfully +called "fresh blood," struck his faithful subjects as an ever-recurring +miracle of statecraft. "Nothing," he used to say to his intimates, +"nothing ages a man like living always with the same woman." Well +aware, on the other hand, of the inequality of social conditions and +keenly desirous of raising the moral tone of his people, he framed iron +laws to restrain those irregularities of married life which had been a +disreputable feature of local society prior to his accession. + +Not in vain had he pondered in youth the political maxims of the great +Florentine. He cultivated assiduously the friendship of Church and Mob; +he knew that no throne, however seemingly well-established, can weather +the blasts of fortune save by resting on those twin pillars of +security. So it came about that, while all Europe was convulsed in +savage warfare, his relations with other rulers were marked by rare +cordiality and simplicity of intercourse. He never failed to conciliate +his more powerful neighbours by timely gifts of local delicacies--gifts +of dark-eyed virgins to grace their palaces, and frequent hampers of +those succulent LANGOUSTES for which the coastal waters of the island +are renowned, both items of the finest quality obtainable. A born +statesman, he extended this ingratiating demeanour even to those minor +sovereigns from whom, to all appearance, she had nothing to fear, +supplying them likewise with periodical consignments of pretty maidens +and well-flavoured crayfish, only of somewhat inferior quality--the +crustaceans often too young, the damsels occasionally over-ripe. + +His high aspirations made him the precursor of many modern ideas. In +educational and military matters, more especially, he ranks as a +pioneer. He was a pedagogue by natural instinct. He took a sincere +delight in the school-children, limited their weekly half-holidays to +five, designed becoming dresses for boys and girls, decreed that lute +playing and deportment should become obligatory subjects in the +curriculum, and otherwise reformed the scholastic calendar which, +before his day, had drifted into sad confusion and laxity. Sometimes he +honoured the ceremony of prize-giving with his presence. On the other +hand it must be admitted that, judged by modern standards, certain of +his methods for punishing disobedience smacks of downright pedantry. +Thrice a year, on receiving form the Ministry of Education a list +containing the names of unsatisfactory scholars of either sex, it was +his custom to hoist a flag on a certain hill-top; this was a signal for +the Barbary pirates, who then infested the neighbouring ocean, to set +sail for the island and buy up these perverse children, at purely +nominal rates, for the slave-markets of Stamboul and Argier. They were +sold ignominiously--by weight and not by the piece--to mark his +unqualified disapproval of talking and scribbling on blotting-pads +during school hours. + +It is recorded of the Good Duke that on one occasion he returned from +this scene looking haggard and careworn, as though the sacrifice of so +many young lives weighed on his fatherly spirit. Presently, envisaging +his duties towards the State, he restrained these natural but unworthy +emotions, smiled his well-known smile, and gave utterance to an +apophthegm which had since found its way into a good many copy-books: +"In the purity of childhood," he said, "lie the seeds of national +prosperity." And if it be enquired by what arts of Machiavellian +astuteness he alone, of all Christian princes, contrived to maintain +friendly relations with these formidable Oriental sea-rovers, the +answer lies at hand. His device was one of extreme simplicity. He +appealed to their better natures by sending them, at convenient +intervals, shiploads of local delicacies, girls and lobsters--of +indifferent quality, it is true, but sufficiently appetizing to attest +his honourable intentions. + +His predecessors, intent only upon their pleasures, had given no +thought to the possibility of a hostile invasion of their fair domain. +But the Good Duke, despite his popularity, was frequently heard to +quote with approval that wise old adage which runs "In peace, prepare +for war." Convinced of the instability of all mundane affairs and +being, moreover, a man of original notions as well as something of an +artist in costumery, he was led to create that picturesque body of men, +the local Militia, which survives to this day and would alone entitle +him to the grateful notice of posterity. These elegant warriors, he +calculated, would serve both for the purpose of infusing terror into +the minds of potential enemies, and of acting as a decorative +body-guard to enhance his own public appearances on gala days. He threw +his whole soul into the enterprise. After the corps had been duly +established, he amused himself by drilling them on Sunday afternoons +and modelling new buttons for their uniforms; to give them the +requisite military stamina he over-fed and starved them by turns, +wrapped them in sheepskin overcoats for long route-marches in July, +exercised them in sham fights with live grapeshot and unblunted +stilettos and otherwise thinned their ranks of undesirables, and +hardened their physique, by forcing them to escalade horrible +precipices at midnight on horseback. He was a martinet; he knew it; he +gloried on the distinction. "All the world loves a disciplinarian," he +was wont to say. + +Nevertheless, like many great princes, he realized that political +reasons might counsel at times an abatement of rigour. He could relent +and show mercy. He could interpose his authority in favour of the +condemned. + +He relented on one celebrated occasion which more than any other helped +to gain for him the epithet of "The Good"--when an entire squadron of +the Militia was condemned to death for some supposed mistake in giving +the salute. The record, unfortunately, is somewhat involved in +obscurity and hard to disentangle; so much is clear, however, that the +sentence was duly promulgated and carried into effect within half an +hour. Then comes the moot question of the officer in command who was +obviously destined for execution with the rest of his men and who now +profited, as events proved, by the clemency of the Good Duke. It +appears that this individual, noted for a childlike horror of bloodshed +(especially when practiced on his own person), had unaccountably +absented himself from the ceremony at the last moment--slipping out of +the ranks in order, as he said, to bid a last farewell to his two aged +and widowed parents. He was discovered in a wine-shop and brought +before a hastily summoned Court-martial. There his old military courage +seems to have returned to him. He demonstrated by a reference to the +instructions laid down in the Militiaman's Year-book that no mistake in +saluting had been made, that his men had therefore been wrongfully +convicted and illegally executed and that he A FORTIORI, was innocent +of any felonious intent. The Court, while approving his arguments, +condemned him none the less to the indignity of a double decapitation +for the offence of leaving his post without a signed permit from His +Highness. + +It was at this point that the Good Duke interposed on his behalf. He +rescinded the decree; in other words, he relented. "Enough of bloodshed +for one day," he was heard to remark, quite simply. + +This speech was one of his happiest inspirations. Instantly it echoed +from mouth to mouth; from end to end of his dominions. Enough of +bloodshed for one day! That showed his true heart, the people declared. +Enough of bloodshed! Their enthusiasm grew wilder when, in an access of +princely graciousness, he repaired the lamentable excess of zeal by +pinning the Order of the Golden Vine to the offending officer's breast; +it rose to a veritable frenzy as soon as they learned that, by Letters +Patent, the entire defunct squadron had been posthumously ennobled. And +this is only one of many occasions on which this ruler, by his intimate +knowledge of human nature and the arts of government, was enabled to +wrest good from evil, and thereby consolidate his throne.... + +It is passing strange, on the face of it, that this vivid personality, +one of the most arresting figures in the history of the country, should +be so briefly dealt with in the pages of Monsignor Perrelli. Doubly +strange, and a serious disappointment to the reader, in view of the +fact that the two men were contemporaries, and that the learned writer +must have enjoyed exceptional facilities for obtaining first-hand +knowledge of his subject. Almost inexplicable indeed, when one +remembers those maxims which he himself, in the Introduction to his +ANTIQUITIES, lays down for the writing of history; when one calls to +mind his own gleams of exotic scholarship, those luminous asides and +fruitful digressions, those statesmanlike comments on things in general +which make his work not so much a compendium of local lore as a mirror +of the polite learning of his age. It is no exaggeration to say that, +compared with the ample treatment meted out to inconspicuous rulers +like Alfonso the Seventeenth or Florizel the Fat, his account of the +Good Duke Alfred is the baldest, the most perfunctory and conventional +of chronicles. Neither good nor evil is related of him. There is +nothing but a monotonous enumeration of events. + +It was the bibliographer who, poring over the pages of the rival monk +Father Capocchio, that audacious and salacious friar already +mentioned--it was the bibliographer who hit upon a passage which +suggested a solution of the mystery and proved that, though Monsignor +Perrelli lived during the reign of the Good Duke, it would be +stretching unduly the sense of a plain word to say that he "flourished" +under his rule. Other persons may have flourished; not so the kindly +prelate. + +"Nothing whatever," says this implacable enemy of Nepenthe, "is to be +recorded to the credit of the sanguinary brigand--so he terms the Good +Duke--nothing whatsoever: save and except only this, that he cut off the +ears of a certain prattler, intriguer, and snuff-taking sensualist +called Perrelli who, under the pretence of collecting data for an +alleged historical treatise, profited by his priestly garb to play fast +and loose with what little remained of decent family life on that +God-abandoned island. Honour to whom honor is due! The ostensible +reason for this unique act of justice was that the said Perrelli had +appeared at some palace function with paste buckles on his shoes, +instead of silver ones. The pretext was well chosen, inasmuch as the +tyrant added to his other vices and absurdities the pose of being an +extravagant stickler for etiquette. We happen to know, nevertheless, +that the name of a young dancer, a prime favourite at Court, cropped up +persistently at the time in connection with this malodorous but +otherwise insignificant episode." + +It were idle, at this hour of the day, to pursue the enquiry; the +mutilation of Monsignor Perrelli's person, however, would explain +better than anything else his equivocal attitude as historian. Nor is +the incident altogether inconsistent with what we know of the Duke's +cheerful propensities. "Nose after ears!" was one of his blithest +watchwords. Faced with so dispiriting a prospect and aware that His +Highness was as good as his princely word, the sympathetic scholar, +while too resentful to praise his achievements, may well have been too +prudent to disparage them. Hence his reticence, his circumspection. +Hence that monotonous enumeration of events. + +This microscopic blot on the Duke's escutcheon, as well as other more +commendable details of his life, were duly noted down by the zealous +Mr. Eames who, in addition, had the good fortune to receive as a gift +from his kindly but unassuming friend Count Caloveglia a quaint +portrait of the prince, hitherto unknown--an engraving which he purposed +to reproduce, together with other fresh iconographical material, in his +enlarged and fully annotated edition of the ANTIQUITIES. The print +depicts His Highness full face, seated on a throne in the accoutrements +of Mars, with a gallant wig flowing in mazy ringlets from under the +helmet upon his plated shoulders; overhead, upon a canopy of cloud, +reclines a breezy assemblage of allegorical females--Truth, Mercy, Fame +with her trumpet, and so forth. His nervous clean-shaven features do +not wear the traditional smile; they are thoughtful, almost grim. On +his left is portrayed a huge CANNON astride of which can be seen a +chubby angel; the Duke's hand reposes, in a paternal caress on the +cherub's head--symbolical doubtless of his love of children. His right +elbow rests upon a table, and the slender bejewelled fingers are +listlessly pressing open a lettered scroll of parchment on which can be +deciphered the words "A CHI T'HA FIGLIATO" (to her who bare thee)--a +legend which the bibliographer, whose acquaintance with the vernacular +was not on a level with his classical attainments, conjectured to be +some fashionable courtly toast of the period. + +The mention of artillery recalls the fact that His Highness was an +amateur of ordnance. He established a gun-foundry on the island, and +what he did not know about the art of casting pieces, as practised in +his day, was plainly not worth knowing. Had it not been for his +passionate love of testing new processes and new combinations of metal, +he might have attained to a European reputation in that department. But +he was always experimenting, and the consequence was that his cannons +were always splitting. One, however, a monster of its kind, remained +intact, to outward appearances. It was fired on every conceivable +occasion--to summon the Militia, for example, from remote corners of the +island at any hour of the day or night, a considerable hardship to +those who lived at a distance of two or three miles, seeing that +according to the instructions set forth in the Militiaman's Year-book, +the sternest penalties were imposed upon all who failed to appear in +their ranks at the Palace gates within five minutes after the signal +had been sounded. + +It was a perilous gun to handle. Owing to some undiscoverable flaw of +construction or imperfection in the alloy, the monster soon developed a +disconcerting knack of back-firing, hazardous to life and limb. It +stands to reason that the Good Duke attached no undue importance to any +trifling disaster accruing therefrom. On the contrary, in order to be +sure of a thunderous detonation, he often deigned to superintend in +person the loading of this particular piece. + +"More powder," he would then command. "More powder! Ram it in! Never +mind her little caprices! A good salute is worth a good soldier! More +powder! Fill her up to the brim! She's only playful, like her master." +Those who lost fingers or hands or arms received the Order of the +Golden Vine. Whenever a major portion of the anatomy, a head or so +forth, went astray, the victim was posthumously ennobled. + +Since his day, thanks to the science of a Paduan engineer, this defect +has been almost completely overcome, and the gun can still be heard on +great occasions, such as the Duke's birthday, the Festival of the +Patron Saint, or the visit to the island of some foreign sovereign; it +is also discharged, as of yore, to summon the Militia for the purpose +of quelling any popular disturbance. But even now it occasionally +relapses into its old humours--with this difference, that instead of +being decorated with a coveted distinction, the disabled man is sent to +the hospital and told not to make a fool of himself next time. + +This was the gun whose sound attracted the strained attention of Mr. +Keith and his companions, far away, on the sea, under the cliffs. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XX + + + + + +The firing had ceased; the boat began to glide forwards once more. But +Mr. Heard's eye remained fixed upon the ill-omened black rock. The +sun's rays had already licked dry the moisture on its surface; it shone +with a steady dull glow. Some malefic force seemed to dwell here. Some +demon haunted the place, peering out of the crevices or rising up from +the turquoise-tinted water at its foot. The suicides' rock! + +That vague sense of apprehension, of impending disaster, once more +invaded him. Suddenly it revealed itself in definite terms. A ghastly +notion flitted through his mind. + +"You think it possible that Denis--?" he began. + +His friend seemed to have lost all interest in that subject. It was a +way he had. + +"Denis? I really could not tell. I'm not sufficiently in his +confidence.... Honour thy father and thy mother," he proceeded, +reverting to his former theme. "What think you, Heard, of this old +injunction? Is it not altogether obsolete? Was it not written for quite +other conditions? Honour thy father and mother. Why? The State educates +children, feeds them, investigates and cures their complaints, washes +and weighs them, reports on their teeth and stomachs, prescribes when +they may begin to smoke and enter public-houses: where does parental +authority come in? The State provides old folks with refuges and +pensions: how about the former obligations of children? Child and +parent alike now thank the community for what they once received from +each other. And the geographical elements that went to the making of a +home are also dispersed. Rich and poor roam like gipsies from one +country to another, from one flat into the next; the patriarchal board +is replaced by clubs and grill-rooms and fried-fish shops. Many a man +who thinks to found a home discovers that he has merely opened a tavern +for his friends. Note, too, that the family has outgrown its +ecclesiastical sanction; the oil of supernaturalism which once greased +the wheels has run dry; the machinery is creaking. Industrial +conditions have killed the old home. REQUIESCAT! Honour thy father and +mother. Industrialism has killed that commandment. Thou shalt not +steal. Consider this injunction, Heard, and ask yourself whether +industrialism does not split its sides with laughing at it. If we are +to galvanize that old collection of laws into some semblance of life, +every one f them must be re-written and brought up to date. They are +inappropriate for modern life; their interest is purely historical. We +want new values. We are no longer nomads. Industrialism has killed the +pastoral and the agricultural points of view. And how the modern Jews +smile at our infatuation for those queer doctrines and legends which +they themselves have long ago outgrown. Apropos, what has become of +Marten?" + +"Left the island, I hear." + +"Quick work. Now I wonder why?" + +Everybody wondered at Marten's precipitate departure. Even Angelina +wondered. + +She just wondered. + +Had he known that she wondered, he might have been tempted to prolong +his stay. But Marten was too young to be a practical psychologist. He +had lived for half a day in terror of what he called "the inevitable +reaction," unaware of the fact that certain people do not suffer from +reactions and too engrossed in mineralogy to have learnt, from a study +of other sciences, that Angelina was one of them. She had passed that +stage, with Homeric laughter, long before his appearance on Nepenthe. +She just wondered, nowadays. + +Scared, as though the avenging Furies were at his heels, he quitted the +scene of his nocturnal romance, leaving half his geological projects +incomplete. Had he taken the amiable Don Francesco into his confidence +he might have heard something to his advantage. But the scientist could +not endure the sight of a Christian priest. Like other intolerant folk +he was now paying for his prejudices. + +"An erotic little beast," Keith went on. "And a typical Hebrew--a +scoffer. Have you noticed what a disruptive and irreverential brood +they are? They move up and down society like some provocative fluid, +insensible to our ideals; they take a diabolical pleasure in shattering +our old-established conceptions of right and wrong. I confess I like +them for that; they need shattering, some of those conceptions. And +they have their weaknesses too, their Achilles heel--music, for +instance, or chess. When next you are in town don't forget to go to +that little chess club of theirs over Aldgate East station. It is +better than a play to watch their faces. And with all this materialism +they have a mysterious feminine leaven of enthusiasm and unworldliness. +What pecuniary advantage could Marten expect to gain from his +minerals?" + +"A professorship." + +"Why, possibly. He had the professorial temperament; there was not much +poetry in his composition. If you were to ask him, 'What are those +wonderful rocks over there, shaped like some Titanic organ and glowing +with a kind of violet flame?' he would say, 'Organ be blowed. It's +columnar lithoidite.' I learnt a little from him, but not enough. I +wish we had him here. He could have told us something." + +And Mr. Keith, ever avid of fresh things, regretted his lost +opportunities. He was in one of this acquisitive, Corsair moods. He +said: + +"I could take geology by the throat just now. It's disgusting, not to +know things!" + +His companion, meanwhile, beheld the panorama in all its nightmarish +splendour, as it drifted past him. He saw the bluffs of feathery +pumice, the lava precipices--frozen cataracts of white, black, blood +red, pale grey and sombre brown, smeared over with a vitreous enamel of +obsidian or pierced by oily, writhing dykes that blazed with metallic +scintillations. Anon came some yawning cleft or an assemblage of dizzy +rock-needles, fused into whimsical tints and attitudes, spiky, +distorted, over-toppling; then a bold tufa rampart, immaculate in its +beauty, stainless as a curtain of silk. And as the boat moved on he +looked into horrid dells which the rains had torn out of the loose +scoriae. Gaping wounds, they wore the bright hues of corruption. Their +flanks were blotched with a livid nitrous efflorescence, with flaring +sulphur, unhealthy verdure of pitchstone, streaks of arsenical +vermilion; their beds--a frantic maze of boulders. + +He beheld this crazy stratification, this chaos of incandescent nature, +sent in a flame of deep blue sky and sea. It lay there calmly, like +some phantasmagoric flower, some monstrous rose that swoons away, with +upturned face, in a solar caress. + +He saw it with the eye. His mind was elsewhere. He was trying, in +honest and relentless fashion, to discover himself. What if his human +values were really wrong? + +Thomas, the doubting apostle.... + +Africa had made him think; had made him more silent and reflective than +ever. And now this sudden strange stimulus of Nepenthe--it was driving +his thoughts headlong, out of their old grooves. + +Here was Keith, a man of altogether different stamp, drawing +conclusions which he dared not formulate for himself. How far were they +applicable, those old Hebrew precepts, to modern conditions? Were they +still availing as guides to conduct? + +"You are a candid person, Keith, and I think I am. I sincerely try to +be. Will you tell me what you think? You seem to have a quarrel with +Moses and his commandments, which we are taught to regard as the +keystone of ethics. I don't want to discuss things. I want to listen to +the opinions of a man so different from myself as you are. It may do me +good. And I think I could stand almost anything," he added, with a +laugh, "in this landscape--in this clear pagan light, as you call it." + +"I used to be interested in such things as a boy. I suppose all +respectable boys are; and I was respectable even at that tender age. +Nowadays, though I still pick up an Oriental rug now and then, I have +no further use for Oriental gods." + +"What is your objection to them?" + +Mr. Keith paused before replying. Then he said: + +"The drawback of Oriental gods is that they have been manufactures by +the proletariat for the use of the aristocracy. They act accordingly; +that is, they distil the morality of their creators which I consider a +noxious emanation. The classic gods were different. They were invented +by intellectualists who felt themselves capable of maintaining a kind +of comradeship with their deities. Men and gods were practically on a +level. They walked hand in hand over the earth. These gods belonged to +what one might call the horizontal or downstairs variety." + +"And those others?" + +"Oh, they are the upstairs or vertical type. They live overhead. Why +overhead? Because they have been created by the proletariat. The +proletariat loves to humiliate itself. Therefore they manufacture a god +who approves of grovelling, a god who can look down upon them. They +exalt this deity to an infinite degree in point of goodness and +distance, and in so doing they inevitably abase themselves. Now I +disapprove of grovelling. That means I disapprove of upstairs gods." + +"Upstairs gods--" + +"If you walk into my front door as a distinguished visitor I am happy +to show you the place. You can prowl about the garden, poke your nose +into the pantry and learn, if it amuses you, all about my private life. +But if you rent a high attic overlooking my premises and stair out of +your window all day long, watching my movements and noting down +everything I do, why, damn it, I call that vulgar. Staring is bad form. +Vertical gods are inquisitive. I don't like to be supervised. I don't +care about this DOSSIER business. My garden is for you and me to walk +about in, not for outsiders to stare into. Which reminds me that you +have not been to see me lately. You ought to come and look at my +cannas; you really ought! They are in magnificent bloom just now. When +shall it be?" + +Mr. Keith seemed to be already tired of the subject. In fact he was as +near being bored as ever he allowed himself to be. But the other +refused to let the conversation be side-tracked. He wanted to know. + +"Vertical and horizontal gods.... Dear me. Sounds rather profane." + +"I have not heard that word for quite a long time." + +"You don't feel the need of any kind of superior being to control human +affairs?" + +"Not up to the present. I can find no room in my Cosmos for a deity, +save as a waste product of human weakness, an excrement of the +imagination. If you gave me the sauciest god that ever sat on a cloud +or breakfasted with the Village Idiot--'pon my word, I shouldn't know +what to do with him. I don't collect bric-a-brac myself, and the +British Museum is dreadfully overstocked. Perhaps the Duchess could +make some use of him, if he specialized in lace vestments and choral +mass. By the way, I hear that she is going to be admitted into the +Roman Church next week; there is to be a luncheon after the ceremony. +Are you going?" + +"Vertical and horizontal gods.... I never heard that distinction +made before." + +"It is a difference, my dear Heard. Mankind remains in direct contact +with the downstairs variety. That simplifies matters. But the peculiar +position of those others--perpendicularly overhead at a vast +distance--necessitates a troublesome code of verbal signals, +unintelligible to common folk, for the expression of mutual desires. +You cannot have any god of this kind without some such cumbrous +contrivance to bridge over the gulf and make communication possible. It +is called theology. It complicates life very considerably. Yes," he +pursued, "the vertical-god system is not only vulgar; it is perplexing +and expensive. Think of the wastage, of the myriads of people who have +been sacrificed because they misinterpreted some enigmatical word in +the code. Why are you intent on these conundrums?" + +"Well, partly at least, it's quite a practical matter. You know that +American millionaire, van Koppen, and the scandal attached to his +peculiar habits? It made me wonder, only yesterday--" + +But at this juncture the tiresome old boatman lifted up his voice once +more. + +"See that high cliff, gentlemens? Funny thing happen there, very funny. +Dam-fool foreigner here, he collect flowers. Always collecting flowers +on bad rocks; sometimes with rope round him, for fear of falling; with +rope, ha, ha, ha! Nasty man. And poor. No money at all. He always say, +'All Italians liars, and liars where go? To Hell, sure. That's where +liars go. That's where Italians go.' Now rich man he say liar to poor +man. But poor man, he better not say liar to rich man. That so, +gentlemens. One day he say liar to nice old Italian. Nice old man +think: 'Ah, you wait, putrid puppy of bastard pig, you wait.' Nice old +man got plenty good lot vineyards back of cliff there. One day he walk +to see grapes. Then he look to end of cliff and see rope hanging. Very +funny, he think. Then he look to end of rope and see nasty-man hanging. +That so, gentlemens. Nasty-man hanging in air. Can't get up. 'Pull me +up,' says he. Nice old man, he laugh--ha, ha, ha! laugh till his belly +hurt. Then he pull out knife and begin to cut rope. 'See knife?' he +shout down. 'How much to pull up?' Five hundred dollar! 'How much?' +Five thousand! 'How much?' Fifty thousand! Nice old man say quite +quiet: 'You no got fifty thousand in the world, you liar. Liars where +go? To Hell, sure. That's where liars go. That's where you go, Mister. +To Hell.' And he cut rope. Down he go, patatrac! round and round in +air, like firework wheel, on to first rock--pa-pa-pa-paff! Six hundred +feets. After that he arrive, all messy, in water. That so, gentlemens. +Gone where to? Swim to Philadelphia? I don't think! Him drownded, sure. +Ha, ha, ha! Nice old man, when he come home that morning, he laugh. He +laugh. He just laugh. He laugh first quiet, then loud. He laugh all the +time, and soon family too. He laugh for ten days, till he nearly die. +Got well again, and live plenty good years after. In Paradise to-day, +God rest his soul! And never found out, no never. Fine judge on +Nepenthe. Always fine judge here. He know everything, and he know +nothing. Understand? All nice people here. That so, gentlemens." + +He told the tale with Satanic gusto, rocking himself to and fro as +though convulsed with some secret joy. Then, after expectorating +violently, he resumed the oars which had been dropped in the heat of +gesticulation. + +The bishop was pensive. There was something wrong with this +story--something fundamentally wrong. He turned to Keith: + +"That man must be a liar too. If, as he says, the thing was never found +out, how can he have learnt all about it?" + +"Hush, my dear fellow. He thinks I don't know, but I do. It was his own +father to whom the adventure occurred." + +"The adventure?" said Mr. Heard. + +"The adventure. Surely you are not going to make a tragedy of it? If +you cannot see the joke of that story, you must be hard to please. I +nearly died of laughing when I first heard it." + +"What would you have done?" + +"If I had been the botanist? I would not have made myself disagreeable +to the natives. Also, I would not have got myself into a tangle with +that rope." + +"You think he ought to have cut it?" + +"What else could the poor fellow do? It strikes me, Heard, you attach +some inordinate importance to human life." + +"It's all rather complex," sighed the bishop. + +"Now that is really interesting!" + +"Interesting?" + +"Why should you find it complex, when I find it simple? Let me see. Our +lives are perfectly insignificant, aren't they? We know it for a fact. +But we don't like it. We don't like being of no account. We want some +thing to make us feel more valuable than we are. Consequently we invent +a fiction to explain away that insignificance--the fiction of a +personality overhead everlastingly occupied in watching every single +one of us, and keenly engrossed in our welfare. If this were the case, +we would cease to be insignificant, and we might try to oblige him by +not killing each other. It happens to be a fiction. Get rid of the +fiction, and your feeling of complexity evaporates. I perceive you are +in an introspective mood. Worrying about some pastoral epistle?" + +"Worry about my values, as you would say. Up to the present, Keith, I +don't seem to have had time to think; I had to act; there was always +something urgent to be taken in hand. Now that I am really lazy for the +first time, and in this stimulating environment, certain problems of +life keep cropping up. Minor problems, of course; for it is a +consolation to know that the foundations of good conduct are immutable. +Our sense of right and wrong is firmly implanted in us. The laws of +morality, difficult as they often are to understand, have been written +down for our guidance in letters that never change." + +"Never change? You might as well say, my dear Heard, that these cliffs +never change. The proof that the laws of good conduct change is this, +that if you were upright after the fashion of your great-grandfather +you would soon find yourself in the clutches of the law for branding a +slave, or putting a bullet through someone in a duel. I grant that +morality changes slowly. It changes slowly because the proletariat, +whose product it is, does the same. There is not much difference, I +imagine, between the crowds of old Babylon and new Shoreditch; hence +their peculiar emanations resemble each other more or less. That is why +morality compares so unfavourably with intellectuality, which is the +product of the upper sections of society and flashes out new lights +every moment. But even morality changes. The Spartans, a highly moral +people, thought it positively indecent not to steal. A modern vice, +such as mendacity, was accounted a virtue by the greatest nation of +antiquity. A modern virtue, like that of forgiving one's enemies, was +accounted a vice proper to slaves. Drunkenness, reprobated by ancients +and moderns alike, became the mark of a gentlemen in intermediate +periods." + +"I see what you are driving at. You wish me to think that this +fictitious value, as you would call it--this halo of sanctity--with which +we now invest a human life, may be blown away at any moment. Possibly +you are right. Perhaps we English do exaggerate its importance. They +don't take much account of life in my part of Africa." + +"And then, I disagree with what you say about the difficulty of +understanding the laws of morality. Any child can grasp the morality of +its period. Why should I pretend to be interested in what a child can +grasp? If is a positive strain to keep one's mind at that low level. +Why should I impose this strain upon myself? When a group-up man shows +an unfeigned interest in such questions I regard him as a case of +arrested development. All morality is a generalization, and all +generalizations are tedious. Why should I plague myself with what is +tedious? Altogether the question that confronts me is not whether +morality is worth talking about, but whether it's worth laughing at. +Sometimes I think it is. It reminds me of those old pantomime jokes +that make one quite sad, at first, with their heart-breaking vulgarity; +those jokes, you know, that have to be well rubbed in before we begin +to see how really funny they are. And, by Jove, they do rub this one +in, don't they? You must talk to Don Francesco about these things. You +will find him sound, though he does not push his conclusions as far as +I do--not in public, at least. Or to Count Caloveglia. He is a +remarkable Latin, that old man. Why don't you drive up one day and have +a look at his Locri Faun? Street, the South Kensington man, thinks very +highly of it." + +"I would like to listen to you just now. I am listening, and thinking. +Please go on. I'll preach you my sermon some other day." + +"Will you? I wonder! I don't believe, Heard, that you will preach +another sermon in your life. I don't think you will ever go back to +Africa, or to any other episcopal work. I think you have reached a +turning point." + +The bishop was thoughtful for a moment. Those words went home. Then he +said lightly: + +"You are in better vein than you were a short while ago." + +"That story of the botanist has revived me. He tells it rather well, +doesn't he? It is good to inhabit a world where such things can still +happen. I feel as if life were worth living. I feel as if I could +discuss anything. What were you going to say about the American +millionaire?" + +"Ah yes," replied Mr. Heard. "I wondered, supposing these reports about +the ladies are true, how far you and I, for example, should condone his +vices." + +"Vices. My dear bishop! Under a sky like this. Have a good look at it; +do." + +Mr. Heard, barely conscious of what he was doing, obeyed the counsel. +Raising his hand, he pushed the silken awning to one side. Then he +peered skyward, into the noonday zenith; into an ocean of blue, +immeasurable. There was no end to this azure liquid. Gazing thus, his +intelligence became aware of the fact that there are skies of different +kinds. This one was not quite like his native firmament. Here was no +suggestion of a level space overhead, remote, but still conceivable--a +space whereon some god might have sat enthroned, note-book in hand, +jotting down men's virtues, and vices, and what not. A sky of this kind +was obviously not built to accommodate deities in a sitting posture. + +Instead of commenting on this simple observation he remarked: + +"I mean, whether one should publicly approve of van Koppen's ladies, +supposing they exist." + +"Why should I approve or disapprove? Old Koppen's activities do not +impinge on mine. Like a sensible fellow he cultivates a hobby. He +indulges himself. Why interfere? Tell me, why should I disapprove of +things?" + +"Look here, Keith! Not long ago you were disapproving of vertical +gods." + +"That is different. They do impinge on my activities." + +"Are the peculiar hobbies of their votaries distasteful to you?" + +"Not at all. Their hobbies do not clash with mine. To feel righteous, +or to feel sinful, is quite an innocent form of self-indulgence--" + +"Innocent self-indulgence? Dear me! You seem to be taking morality by +the throat for a change. Is that your conception of sin? How should +Moses have come to inscribe some particular form of wrong-doing into +his Code, if it had not proved harmful to the community at large?" + +His friend paused before replying. He took out another cigar, bit off +its end, and lighted it. Then he sent a few fragrant whiffs over the +sea. At last he said: + +"Moses! I have a clear portrait of Moses in my mind; a clear and +favourable portrait. I imagine him gentle, wise, and tolerant. Picture +to yourself such a man. He is drawing up a preliminary list of the more +noteworthy forms of misconduct, with a view to submitting it for Divine +approval, to be welded later into the so-called Ten Commandments. He is +still puzzling, you perceive, which sins ought to be included and which +left out. Now that particular offence of which our millionaire is +accused happens to have been left out of consideration so far." + +"Why has it been left out?" enquired the bishop. + +"Nomadic habits. And besides--Moses, don't forget, is a kindly old +fellow, who likes people to have as much harmless amusement as +possible; he is not always sniffing about to discover evil. But Aaron, +or some other old family friend of his, thinks differently. He is a +person such as we all know--a sour-faced puritan who has lost the vigour +which people, rightly or wrongly, attribute to van Koppen. This man +forgets what he used to do in his own youthful days; he comes up to +Moses, professing to be horrified at this particular offence. 'These +young people,' he says, 'the way they go on! It's a sin, that's what it +is. And you, Moses, I'm ashamed of you. This sort of thing ought to be +stopped. It ought to be publicly reprimanded in those blessed Tables of +yours.' 'A sin?' says gentle Moses. 'You surprise me, Aaron. I confess +it never struck me in that light before. But I think I see your point. +We have a conference to-night on the Holy Mountain; I may be able to +get a clause inserted--' 'Do, there's a good fellow,' says the other. +'But aren't you a little hard on the youngsters?' asks Moses. 'You +wouldn't believe it, but I was a boy myself once and I should have got +into a lot of rows if such an enactment had been in existence then. +Moreover (and here his eyes assume a rapt, prophetic look) I seem to +see, rising out of the distant future, a personage of royal line, +beloved of God--one David who, if your proposal were to come into force, +would be classed as a pretty hot sinner,' 'Oh, bother David! Look here, +I'm not asking for a loan of money, old man. Just see to it that my New +Sin is inscribed on the Tables. Hang it all! What's that, to a man of +your influence up there? You can't think how it annoys me nowadays to +see all these young people--all these young people--need I go into +particulars?' 'You needn't. I'm not altogether a fool,' says gentle +Moses. 'And I'll see what I can do to oblige you, if only for the sake +of your dear mother.'" + +The bishop, at the end of this narration, could not help smiling. + +"That," continued Keith, "is how Moses gets talked over by the +Pharisees. That is how sins are manufactured and classified. And from +that preposterous old Hebrew system of right and wrong they jump +straight into our English penal code. And there they sit tight," he +added. + +"Is that your quarrel with what you call the upstairs god system?" + +"Precisely! It affects me by its unsanitary tendency to multiply sins; +that is to say, when it transforms those sins into legal crimes. How +would you like to be haled before a Court of law for some ridiculous +trifle, which became a crime only because it used to be a sin, and +became a sin only because some dyspeptic old antediluvian was envious +of his neighbour's pleasure? Our statute-book reeks of discarded +theories of conduct; the serpent's trail of the theologian, of the +reactionary, is over all." + +"It never struck me in that light before," said Mr. Heard. + +"No? Our reverence for inspired idiots: has it never struck you? Don't +you realize that we are still in the stage of that ENFANT TERRIBLE of +Christianity, Paul of Tarsus, and his gift of tongues? In the stage of +these Russians here, with their decayed Messiah? What do you think of +them?" + +"I must say they look pretty, all bathing together. Rather improper. +But decidedly apostolic. You know I am not easily shocked in such +matters. When you have lived in Africa among the M'tezo! Lovely +fellows. I assure you they could give points to anyone on this island. +And your friends the Bulanga! To think that I once baptized three +hundred of them in one day. And the very next week they ate up old Mrs. +Richardson, our best lady preacher. The poor dear! We buried her riding +boots, I remember. There was nothing else to bury.... It's getting +warm, isn't it? Makes one feel sleepy." + +"Sleepy? I don't agree with you at all. That Russian sect, Heard, had +between two and three million followers out there. But I fancy our +little contingent will not be on this island much longer. The judge +tells me that he means to make short work of them when he gets a +chance. If the Militia have really been called out, I should not be +surprised to learn that the Messiah has been up to some new +tomfoolery." + +"Really? H'm. The Militia.... I find it very warm all of a sudden." + +Mr. Heard had listened enough for the time being. Now he leaned back +and rested. + +But Keith was wide awake. + +"You are a disappointing person, Mr. Heard. First you inveigle me into +a religious discussion and then, when I begin to wake up, you go to +sleep." + +"I didn't want to argue, my dear fellow. It's too hot to argue. I +wanted to hear your opinion." + +"My opinion? Listen, Heard. All mankind is at the mercy of a handful of +neurotics. Neurotics and their catchwords. Catchwords like duty, +charity, purity, sobriety. Sobriety! In order that Miss Wilberforce may +not come home drunk--listen, Heard!--all we other lunatics forgo the +pleasure of a pint of beer after ten o'clock. How we love tormenting +ourselves! Listen, Heard. I'll tell you what it is. We are ripe for a +new Messiah, like these Russians. We are not Europeans. We are Indian +fakirs, self-torturers. We are a pack of masochists. That is what +upstairs gods have done for us. Listen, Heard!" + +The bishop failed to catch the import of this peroration. Its sound +alone reached him like an echo from far away. He was unaccountably +drowsy. + +"Fakirs. I quite understand--" + +The boat seemed to move more slowly than before. Perhaps the oarsmen +were weary, or suffering from the heat. The glare pierced the awning. +Mr. Heard, as he reclined about his cushions, felt the perspiration +gathering on his forehead. A spell had fallen upon him--the spell of a +Southern noon. It lulled his senses. It laid chains upon his thoughts. + +There was a long silence, broken only by the splash of the oars and by +a steady flow of conversation on the part of the two Greek genii, who +seemed impervious to the midday beams and entirely absorbed in one +another. Mr. Heard opened his drooping eyelids from time to time to +take pleasure in their merry play of feature, wondering dreamily what +could be the subject-matter of this endless polite conversation. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXI + + + + + +Both the old boatman and Mr. Keith were correct in their surmises. +There was trouble in the market-place, serious trouble; so serious that +for the first time in five years--ever since that deplorable scandal of +the Irish lady and the poodle--the Militia were being called out. And it +was entirely the fault of the Sacred Sixty-three. + +The Messiah, personally, was not to blame. That poor old man had much +declined of late; he was enfeebled in health and spirits. A French +artist who was specially despatched from Paris to do an original sketch +of him for the enterprising journal L'ILLUSTRATION had, at the end of +several sittings, uncharitably declared him to be "COMPLEETEMENT +GA-GA." The voluptuous surroundings of Nepenthe, the abundant food, +adoration of disciples, alcoholic and carnal debaucheries, had impaired +his tough Monjik frame and blunted his wit, working havoc with that +energy and peasant craftiness which once ruled an Emperor's Court. His +body was obese. His mind was in a state of advanced putrefaction. Even +his personal cleanliness left something to be desired. Sitting there, +puffy and pasty, in a darkened room, he looked more than ever like some +obscene vegetable that has grown up in the shade. + +He moved seldom and with difficulty; he hardly ever opened his mouth +save to eat--for his appetite, thanks to certain daily exertions on the +part of the communal doctor, was still fairly satisfactory. When he +spoke at all it was in scattered monosyllables which even the most +devoted of his disciples were unable to arrange into such coherence as +to justify their inclusion in the GOLDEN BOOK. All this, though hidden +from the world at large, had been observed with dismay by the +initiated. It was an open secret among them that the last twenty-one +sayings ascribed to him in that volume had never issued from his lips +at all. They had been concocted by a clique of young extremists, who +were now masters of the situation. These fanatics edited the GOLDEN +BOOK and held the old man completely in subjection, ousting his former +and more moderate collaborators. + +An ill-considered action on the part of this group led to the disaster +and eclipsed the light of holiness on Nepenthe by bringing the apostles +into conflict with the secular arm of the law. Fretting at the Master's +prolonged inactivity and eager, after the fashion of disciples, to +improve on his maxims, they decided on a bold step. They decided that +the time was ripe for a new Revelation. + +The Messiah's last authentic one, it will be remembered, ran to the +effect that "flesh and blood of warm-blooded beast is Abomination to +Little White Cows." He had been inspired to insert the word +WARM-BLOODED because fish, for example, was an article of diet of which +he was inordinately fond, and he could not bring himself to deprive the +faithful of this gift of God. + +With misplaced zeal, and little thinking that it would cost many of +them their lives and liberties, these enthusiasts gave it out that the +new Revelation ran as follows: "everything derivable from dead beasts +is Abomination to Little White Cows." They had been inspired to insert +the word DEAD because sheep's wool, for example, was an article of +clothing in which they greatly delighted, and they could not bring +themselves to deprive the faithful of this gift of God. + +Even as it stood, the Commandment entailed severe sacrifices on the +part of the Sacred Sixty-three. No boot-leather, no picturesque belts, +no bone knife-handles or combs, no tallow candles.... They were +prepared, none the less, to carry out to the letter this injunction, +since it gave them what all religious people require--something to +torment themselves with; and this is how matters stood when, on that +morning, a stalwart batch of new-comers from the wilds of Muscovy, +burning with the ardour of abnegation and wholly ignorant of local laws +and customs, sauntered across the market-place in freshly purchased +hempen sandals. + +Tobacco being derivable neither from warm-blooded beasts nor yet from +dead ones, a member of the band bethought himself of the fact that he +had run out of cigarettes. Knowing not a word of Italian he entered the +shop of a tobacconist and imitated the gesture of smoking with such +success that the proprietor straightway understood and supplied him +with a packet. Then he remembered that he also needed matches. This +called for a gesture rather more complex; so complex, indeed, that +perhaps nobody but a Nepenthean--gifted, as all his nation is, with +alert intuition--could have divined the Apostle's want. The tobacconist +was equal to the occasion. With a friendly smile of comprehension he +laid on the counter a diminutive pack of wax vestas, price two sous. + +There the matter might have rested but for the new Revelation, which +prompted the sturdy stranger to investigate the composition of the +article tendered. He took out one match and examined it carefully. +Then, triturating its substance between his fingers, he applied his +nose to the product and sniffed critically. The outcome was suspicious +in the highest degree. There was no perceptible odour of beeswax; the +object had been compounded, only too plainly, of the fat of dead +animals; it was the Abomination, the Unclean Thing. Devout, and gifted +with the hot impulse of youth, he acted precisely as he would have +acted in Russia under a similar provocation. With a third gesture, one +of abhorrence and ungovernable fury, he threw the box in the +tobacconist's face. + +And there the matter, once more, might have rested, had the salesman +been a Russian. Russians understand frank dealing. + +He happened to be a native. + +Fully to appreciate what followed, it is necessary to bear in mind that +local tobacconists are in a somewhat anomalous position. They occupy a +social status superior to those of many other countries. They are not +private merchants or ordinary citizens; they are, in a manner, servants +of the State. A native tobacconist is empowered to dispense CARTA +BOLLATA, which is the official stamped paper used for contracts and +other legal documents requiring registration; he deals in tobacco and +postage stamps--government monopolies; he sells, by special licence, wax +vestas, on each box of which there is a duty so minute as not to be +felt by the individual purchaser and yet, in its cumulative effect, so +great as to enable the State to pay, out of this source of revenue +alone, for the upkeep of all its colonial judges at a monthly salary of +forty-five francs apiece. It is a reasonable tax. Don Francesco, who +had notions of political economy and knew something of English life, +having preached to thousands of Catholic miners in Wales and confessed +hundreds of Catholic ladies in Mayfair--an occupation in which he might +still be engaged, but for a little CONTRETEMPS which brought him into +collision with the Jesuits of Mount Street--Don Francesco, who could +voice the Southerner's one-sided point of view, often adverted to this +match-tax when proving the superiority of his country's administrative +methods over those of England. This is what he would say to his +intimate friends: + +"The Russian has convictions but no principles. The Englishman has +principles but no convictions--cast-iron principles, which save him the +trouble of thinking out anything for himself. This is as much as anyone +can ever hope to grasp concerning this lymphatic, unimaginative race. +They obey the laws--a criminal requires imagination. They never start a +respectable revolution--you cannot revolt without imagination. Among +other things they pride themselves on their immunity from vexatious +imposts. Yet whisky, the best quality of which is worth tenpence a +bottle, is taxed till it costs five shillings; ale, the life-blood of +the people, would be dear at three-pence a gallon and yet costs +fivepence a pint; tobacco, which could profitably be sold at twopence a +pound, goes for fivepence an ounce. They will submit to any number of +these extortions, being persuaded, in the depths of their turbid +intelligence, that such things are devised for the good of the nation +at large. That is the Englishman's method of procuring happiness: to +deny himself pleasure in order to save his neighbour's soul. Ale and +tobacco are commodities out of which a man can extract pleasure. They +are therefore appropriate objects for harassing restrictions. But +nobody can extract pleasure out of lucifer matches. They are therefore +pre-eminently unfitted for exploitation as a source of governmental +revenue. So keen is their sense of pleasure and non-pleasure, and such +is their FUROR PHLEGMATICUS on this particular question, that when it +is proposed to establish a tax on matches--an imperceptible duty which +would enrich the Exchequer to a vast extent--they will form a procession +ten miles long to protest against the outrage, and threaten to batter +down the Houses of Parliament. Why? Because there is no ethical purpose +to be served by taxing matches, seeing that only a madman would give +himself the guilty pleasure of either drinking or smoking them. In +short, these English reason after the fashion of paranoiacs--logically, +but from a wrong premise. Not that I dislike their women...." + +The action of the quick-tempered Apostle can now be appraised in its +full enormity. A local tobacconist is a person in authority, a State +official, and the nation safeguards the interests and the fair name of +those who serve it faithfully. When it is remembered that according to +sect 43 of the 16th Section of their Penal Code any person speaking +disrespectfully to, or of, a Government official renders himself liable +to a term of cellular confinement not exceeding thirty-one years, ten +lunar months and eighteen days, it may be imagined what penalties are +applicable to the crime of actual personal violence towards such a +sacrosanct individual--a crime of which the Russian was unquestionably +guilty. + +Now this particular tobacconist, though tremulously sensitive, like all +Southerners, on a point of honour, was as good-natured and forgiving as +might be consistent with his rank of Government official. He passed for +a respectable married man with an eligible daughter and a taste for the +quiet life; he did not want trouble. The purchase of an additional pack +of cigarettes, accompanied or unaccompanied by a frank apology, would +have more than satisfied his sense of honour. + +There the matter might have rested. The second packet might have been +bought and even the apology tendered, but for the ill-considered action +of a young farmer who entered the shop at that moment to procure a +couple of postcards. This worthy lad was one of several dozen aspirants +to the hand of the tobacconist's daughter, whose dowry was reputed to +be considerable. He witnessed the insult and, desirous of standing well +in the graces of a prospective father-in-law, dealt the offending alien +so masterly a punch in the region of the solar plexus that he not only +doubled up, but forgot to straighten himself out again. Two or three +lusty Apostles came to the rescue without delay. They threw the youth +down, stamped on his face, pounded his abdomen, pulled his hair out in +handfuls, and otherwise treated him exactly as if the thing were +happening in Russia. This spectacle was too much for the tobacconist's +sense of honour. With unwonted sprightliness he vaulted over the +writhing cluster and summoned a municipal policeman. The officer was on +the spot in a twinkling, sword and trumpet in hand. And there, in all +conscience, the matter ought to have rested--with the identification and +bestowal in custody of the turbulent parties. + +But frenzy hung in the air; a red cloud of insanity was hovering over +Nepenthe. Although the volcano continued to behave in exemplary +fashion, although the clergy had done their utmost to allay popular +apprehensions, the native mind had not calmed down since the news +concerning the Saint Elias fountain and those other portents had been +disseminated. The inhabitants were in a state of suppressed alarm and +ready, at the least provocation, to burst out into some fiendish act of +folly. And the Russians, especially those latest arrivals, could not +withdraw themselves from the subtle influence of the sound wind, the +frank stimulation of a cloudless sky; it made them fell, after their +gloomy forests and lowering horizons, like wild beasts that rush from +darkened cages into some sunny arena. Everyone lost his wits. The +appearance of a constable, far from restoring order, was the signal for +an uproarious tumult; the FRACAS, as the French artist was heard to +declare, promptly developed into a MELEE. Nobody troubled about the +merits of the case further than that it was a question of Apostles +VERSUS Gentiles. + +The former were in sad minority. But they constituted a serried rank of +muscular Christians; they laid about them like those old monks of +Alexandria. All Russians are born fighters--if not on the battlefield, +then at least in the lanes and taverns of their natal villages. The +Little White Cows, wholly ignorant of the difference between their own +law and that of Italy on questions of assault and battery, used their +fists with such success that thirty natives were stretched out in +almost a few seconds. Their Faith was at stake; moreover, and as a +matter of fact, they were enjoying themselves hugely. The occasion +reminded them of a Sunday at home. + +Then numbers began to tell--numbers and knives. For your sun-scorched +Nepenthean, when duly roused, confesses to an expert knowledge of +anatomy; he can tell you, to the fraction of an inch, where the liver, +the spleen, kidneys and various other coy organs of the human frame are +located. Blood, the blood of the Sacred Sixty-three, began to flow. At +that sight the women, as their manner is, set up a scream. + +The Palace of Justice abutted on the market-place, and up to that +moment His Worship Signor Malipizzo might have been lost to the world, +so deeply immersed was he in threading the labyrinthine mazes of an +exceptionally intricate affiliation case--a warm document, after his own +heart. The sound of the scream suspended his labours. Like a gouty +parrot he hopped down from his seat of judgment, spat on the floor, +limped to the window and took in the situation at a glance. That is to +say, he understood the cause of the disturbance as little as did any +one else; it would have required a divine inspiration to guess that a +box of wax vestas was at the bottom of the affair; but he knew enough, +quite enough, more than enough, for the purpose at hand. He knew, to +begin with, that Apostles were involved in the brawl. He knew, what was +equally important, the provisions of the Penal Code. It sufficed. His +chance for dealing with the Russian colony had at last arrived. +Allowing himself barely time to smack his lips at this providential +interlude he gave orders for the great cannon of Duke Alfred to be +sounded. It boomed once or twice over Nepenthe and reverberated among +the rocks. + +In times of yore a certain interval was wont to elapse before the +Militia could be assembled, living as they did in distant regions of +the island. But nowadays, as befitted a laborious rural population, +they were spending their morning in the wine-shops of the town, +gambling, drinking, or playing skittles. This enabled a sufficient +number of them to forgather, in an incredibly short space of time, at +the outskirts of the market-place (occupied by a seething, howling +tangle of humanity)--there to receive the plainest of instructions. They +were to quell the disorder and to single out for punishment, whenever +possible, the strangers, the obvious authors of the rebellion, easily +discernible by their scarlet blouses. Not that the judge was particular +about the lives or deaths of a few natives; he knew that any injuries +received by his countrymen would strengthen his case against the +outsiders. But an order couched in such terms would look well in the +records of the Court. + +Within ten minutes the market-place was cleared. The Militia had used +their weapons with such precision that four school children, seven +women, eleven islanders, and twenty-six Apostles were wounded--about +half of them, it was believed, mortally. Order reigned in Nepenthe. + +The warm affiliation case having been laid on ice for the nonce, the +next few minutes were occupied by His Worship in issuing warrants of +arrest against the Messiah's followers. They were lodged by batches in +gaol, and in supplementary gaols--disused cellars and so forth. Once +under lock and key they were safe from mischief for an indefinite +length of time, since according to the statutes of the Code of Criminal +Procedure, there is no reason on earth why an Italian lawsuit should +ever end, or indeed, why it should ever begin. They might, and probably +would, remain incarcerated for life, pending the commencement of a +trial which could only be set in motion by the judge himself--a most +improbable conjuncture--or, failing that, by an extravagant bribe to his +official superior, the President of the Court of Cassation. How were +poor Apostles to find the necessary sixty or seventy francs for such a +venture? + +His Worship retired to luncheon, reasonably satisfied with the +morning's work. And yet not altogether delighted. Both the Messiah and +Peter the Great had eluded his wrath. Peter was able to prove, beyond +the shadow of a doubt, that he had spent the last twenty-four hours on +Madame Steynlin's premises and knew nothing whatever of occurrences in +the outside world. In the face of such a fact--so comfortable to common +knowledge, so inherently probable--Malipizzo gave way. He was too good a +lawyer to spoil his case. Sooner or later, he foresaw, that bird would +be caged with the rest of them. Regarding the Messiah, an unexpected +and breathless appeal for mercy was lodged by the Communal doctor, +atheist and freemason like the judge, who implored, with tears in his +eyes, that the warrant for his arrest should be rescinded. By means of +a sequence of rapid and intricate Masonic signs, he explained that +Bazhakuloff was a patient of his; that he was undergoing a daily +treatment with the stomach-pump; that the prison diet being notoriously +slender, he feared that if he, the Messiah, were confined in captivity, +than it, the stomach-pump, would be no longer required and therefore +he, the physician, a family man, deprived of a small but regular source +of income. Again the astute judge relented. This is how the Messiah and +his disciple escaped. + +They escaped, but not for long. + +And all this happened while Mr. Keith and his companion, drowsily +ensconced among the morocco cushions of their boat, were being wafted +over the blue sea, far away, under the cliffs. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXII + + + + + +"The Devil's Rock, gentlemens! The rock of the Devil. Where the young +English lord jump over. Everyone know that story." + +The word "devil" caused the bishop to wake up from his pleasant dreams +with something of a start. + +"You had better take a good look at that cliff," suggested Mr. Keith. +"It is not only the finest on the island but, I fancy, the finest on +the whole Mediterranean. Those on the Spanish coast and on Mount Athos +lack the wonderful colour and the clean surface of this one. Looks as +if it had been done with a knife, doesn't it? Alpine crags seem +vertical but are nearly always inclined; their primary rock, you know, +cannot flake off abruptly like this tufa. This is a genuine precipice. +Plumb!" + +"Terrific," said Mr. Heard. "What was that about the English lord?" + +"Two young fellows who rented the villa at the back of it for a summer. +They used to bathe and booze all day long. I was not on the island at +the time, but of course I heard about it. One day the younger one +jumped over the edge of the cliff for a bet; said he was going to dive. +They never recovered his body. There is a strong current at this point. +That's so, isn't it, Antonio?" + +"That so, gentlemens. Drink branty all the time, both of them. But +little one--everybody smile at him. Pretty boy. Swim and dive, something +lovely. One evening both get drunk and walk along the edge of cliff up +there. Then little one, he say: I good diver, eh, what, friend? Big one +say: You dive prettier than dolphin.--What bet, over cliff here, +now?--Six bottle branty.--Done! Clothes off, over he go, like a sea-bird. +All finished. That so, gentlemens. Next morning they bring clothes to +big one into house. Big one, when he wake up and see clothes lying +there, with no friend inside, he very angry with servants and everybody +else, and drink no more branty for three days. Dam-fool foreigners." + +"That's a tragedy, anyhow," said the bishop. + +"You are right. It is quite artistic--that touch about bringing back the +clothes, the empty shell, next morning. Quite artistic." + +Mr. Heard looked up at the crag. It made him dizzy to picture some +human body hurtling through the air from that awful height. Its surface +was of perfect smoothness. But what struck him even more was the +uncommon and almost menacing coloration. The rock was bluish black, +spattered with maculations of a ruddy sanguine tint, as though drops of +blood had oozed out, in places, from its stony heart. + +"I remember Mrs. Meadows telling me that story," he said to Keith. +"Isn't her villa at the back?" + +"The very place. By the way, when next you call, would you please say +something particularly nice DE MA PART? I don't see half enough of that +lady, considering how much I like her. How is she?" + +"Complains of headache." + +"Headache? That is very unlike Mrs. Meadows. I always look upon her as +a bundle of steel springs. Perhaps something is wrong with the baby." + +"Maybe," replied the bishop. "She seems to dote on it." + +Then that last visit to his cousin suddenly recurred to him; he +remembered her conversation--he thought of the lonely woman up thee. +Strange! Somehow or other, she had been at the back of his mind all the +time. He decided to call again in a day or two. + +Keith said: + +"I should not like to come between her and the child. That woman is a +tiger--mother.... Heard, there has been something in your mind all +day long. What is it?" + +"I believe there has. I'll try to explain. You know those Japanese +flowers--" he began, and then broke off. + +"I am glad you are becoming terrestrial at last. Nothing like Mother +Earth! You cannot think how much money I wasted on Japanese plants, +especially bulbs, before I convinced myself that they cannot be grown +on this soil." + +"Those paper flowers, I mean, which we used to put in our finger-bowls +at country dinner tables. They look like shrivelled specks of +cardboard. But in the water they begin to grow larger and to unfold +themselves into unexpected patterns of flowers of all colours. That is +how I feel--expanding, and taking on other tints. New problems, new +influences, are at work upon me. It is as if I needed altogether fresh +standards. Sometimes I feel almost ashamed--" + +"Ashamed? My dear Heard, this will never do. You must take a blue pill +when we get home." + +"Can it be the south wind?" + +"Everybody blames the poor sirocco. I imagine you have long been +maturing for this change, unbeknown to yourself. And what does it mean? +Only that you are growing up. Nobody need be ashamed of growing up.... +Here we are, at last! We will land at the little beach yonder, near +the end of that gulley. You can go ashore and have a look at the old +thermal establishment. It used to be a gay place with a theatre and +ballrooms and banqueting rooms. Nobody dare enter it nowadays. Haunted! +Perhaps you will see the ghost. As for me, I mean to take a swim. I +always feel as if I needed a bath after talking about religion. You +don't mind my saying so, do you?" + +Mr. Heard, climbing upwards from the beach, felt as though he did not +mind what anyone said about anything. + +With the Devil's Rock the most imposing tract of Nepenthean +cliff--scenery came to an abrupt end. That mighty escarpment was its +furthest outpost. Thereafter the land fell seawards no longer +precipitously, but in wavy earthen slopes intersected by ravines which +the downward-rushing torrents of winter had washed out of the loose +soil. It was at the termination of one of these dry stream-beds that +Mr. Heard set foot on shore. Panting under the relentless heat he wound +his way along a path once carefully tended and engineered, but now +crumbling to decay. + +Before him, on a treeless brown eminence, silhouetted against the blue +sky, stood the ruin. It was a fanciful woe-begone structure, utterly +desolate. The plaster, gnawed away by winds laden with searching +sea-moisture, had fallen to earth, exposing the underlying masonry of +cheap construction whose rusty colour was the same as that of the +ground from which it had arisen, and into which it now seemed ready and +eager to descend. Everything useful or portable, everything that spoke +of man's occupation, everything that suggested life and comfort--the +porcelain tiles, woodwork, window-panes, roofings, mosaic or marble +floors, leaden pipes--all this had been carried away long ago. It stood +there stark, dismantled, de-humanized, in the midday heat. Here was +nothing to charm the eye or conjure up visions of past glory; nothing +elegant or romantic; nothing savouring of grim warlike purposes. It was +a modern ruin; a pile of rubbish; a shameless, frivolous skeleton. +Those hastily built walls and staring windows wore an air of faded +futility, almost of indecency--as though the mouldering bones of some +long-forgotten lady of pleasure had crept out of their tomb to give +themselves an airing in the sunshine. + +Mr. Heard, after glancing at what remained of a pretentious facade, +stepped within. + +Deep shade was here, in those of the chambers whose roofs remained +intact; shade, and a steamy heat, and the noxious odour of some mineral +product--the healing waters. He strayed in the twilight through halls +and corridors, past ample saloons and rows of cells which had +apparently served for convenience of disrobing. Everywhere that noisome +smell accompanied his footsteps; the place was reeking with it. And all +was in decay. Gaudy paper hung in tatters from the ceilings; the dust +lay thick, undisturbed for generations. Unclean things littered in +musty corners. Through gaping skylights a sunny beam would penetrate; +it played about the mildewy stucco partitions encrusted, in patches, +with a poisonous lichen of bright green. Wandering about this dank and +mournful pile of wreckage, he could understand why simple folks should +dread to enter so ghoul-haunted a spot. + +Gladly he issued, by way of an obscure passage, into what had once been +a trim garden. No trace of flowers or shrubs remained; the walks, the +ornamental stone seats and artificial terraces, were merging into brown +earth. Here, in the centre of this ruined pleasaunce, the health-giving +fountain had lately flowed, bubbling up in a couch-shaped basin of +cement. It was now dry. But a damp warmth still clung to its rim, +whereon the mineral had left a comely deposit of opaline texture. +Lowering his hand he felt an intermittent stream of hot air rising out +of the ground, feeble as the breath of a dying man. Still some +mysterious gusts of life down there, he concluded, in the dark earth. +How curious that volcanic connection with the mainland, of which Count +Caloveglia had spoken! + +Soon he found himself beside the shattered framework of a small +pavilion, built in a grotesque Chinese style and looking woefully out +of place in this classic landscape, with the blue Tyrrhenian at its +foot. And here he rested. He surveyed the traces of the old path +leading down from the higher lands in serpentine meanderings; that +path--once, doubtless, bordered by shady trees--whereby all those worldly +invalids had once descended. He pictured the lively caravan afoot, on +mule-back, in sedan chairs, seeking health and pleasure at this site, +now so void of life. Lower down, almost within a stone's throw, lay the +beach. The sailors, father and son, had drawn the boat up to the shore +and were sitting huddled up on its shady side, with some food between +them on a coloured handkerchief. That Brobdingnagian luncheon-basket +had also been disembarked. Keith was swimming, together with his two +genii; he looked like a rosy Silenus. They seemed to be enjoying +themselves vastly, to judge by the outbursts of laughter. Mr. Heard +thought of going to join the fun, but gave up the idea; there was +something astir that clogged his energies. + +He knew them--these Southern noons. If no ghost resided in the +melancholy ruin hard by, there might well be some imponderable hostile +essence afloat in the still air of midday. Anything, he felt, could +happen at this unearthly hour. The wildest follies might be committed +at the bidding of this unseen Presence. + +He tried to recollect what Keith had told him concerning Muhlen, that +corrupt personality. Retlow ... where had he heard that name before? +In vain he flogged his memory. There was an alien power in this +brightness; a power as of a vampire that drained away his faculties, +his vitality; a spirit of evil, exhaling from the sunny calm. It made a +mock, a mirage, of the landscape which danced before his eyes; it +distorted the realities of nature, the works of man.... + +Presently he observed that Keith and his companions were clothed and +occupied in dragging things out of the preposterous food-receptacle. +They called up to him. The spell was released. + +He descended. + +"Nice bathe?" he enquired. + +"Rather! And now these fellows will make a passable omelette, to begin +with. I don't fancy cold luncheons, do you? They seem to lie dead on +one's stomach." + +"Are those sailors not coming with us?" + +"No. They are well paid for their work. No doubt they would like to be +in my service too. But I never employ islanders, except for casual +jobs; it saves me all kinds of local trouble and family intrigues. Nor +yet older people. They are so apt to think; and once a servant begins +to think he ceases to be of use. I believe in the outsider, for all +purposes of human intercourse. If you want a thing done, go to the +outsider, the intelligent amateur. And when you marry, Heard, be sure +to select a wife from another class, another province, another +country--another planet, if possible. Otherwise you will repent it. Not +that I see any objection, on principle, to incest; it strikes me as the +most natural proceeding in the world--" + +"Dear me!" + +"And yet--that inexplicable prejudice. It is probably artificial and of +modern origin. I suspect the priestly caste. Royal families kept up the +custom and do so still, like that of Siam. Odd, how anachronisms linger +longest at the two poles of society. What do you say," he went on, "to +climbing a little up that gorge, into the shade? I cannot digest +properly with the sun staring at me. And tell me, as we go along, your +impressions of the ruin ... I perceive drawbacks to incest; grave +practical drawbacks--sterility, inbreeding. Yes, there is obviously +something to be said for exogamy. AUDI ALTERAM PARTEM as Eames might +say, though God knows why he thinks it sounds better in Latin. Seen the +ghost?" + +The bishop remembered a certain answer given him by Madame Steynlin, to +whom he had once spoken of the "tonic" effects of Keith's conversation. + +"A tonic?" she had said. "Very likely! But not a tonic for men and +women. A tonic for horses." + +After luncheon they improvised a shelter in order to repose awhile. It +was the right thing to do on Nepenthe at that hour of the day, and Mr. +Keith tried to conform to custom even under unusual circumstances such +as these. Protected by the boat's scarlet awning from the rays of the +sun, they slumbered through the flaming hours. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXIII + + + + + +The duchess was a good sleeper, as befitted a person of regular habits +and pure life. + +It was her custom to retire for the night at about eleven o'clock. +Angelina, who reposed in an adjoining room, would enter softly at nine +in the morning, draw up the blinds, and deposit a cup of tea at the +bedside of her mistress. Up to that moment, she would slumber like a +child. Rarely did she suffer from insomnia or nightmare. On this +particular night, however, her rest was troubled by a strange and +disquieting dream. + +She was a little girl once more, at her parental home out West. All the +old memories were around her. It was winter time. She was alone, out of +doors. Snow, the familiar snow, was falling from a sombre sky; already +it lay deep on the boundless plains. It fell without ceasing. The sky +grew darker. Hours seemed to pass, and still the flakes descended. It +was not cold snow. It was warm snow--warm and rather suffocating. Very +suffocating. It began to choke her. Suddenly she found she could +breathe no more. She gave a wild cry of despair-- + +Her maid was standing beside the bed, a lighted candle in her hand. +Otherwise the room was in pitch darkness. Angelina looked like a +Tanagra statuette. Draped in nothing but a clinging nightgown that +reached two inches below the knee and accentuated the charm of her +figure, with the candle-light throwing playful gleams upon her neck and +cheeks, Angelina was an apparition to gladden the heart of man. + +The heart of the Duchess was not gladdened by any means. + +"What is the meaning of this, girl?" she enquired sternly, in what she +took to be the language of the country. "And in the middle of the +night!" + +"It's nine o'clock, Madam." + +"Nine o'clock? Then draw the blinds." + +"I've drawn them." She stepped to the window and tapped on the glass +panes by way of confirmation. "All dark outside," she added. "Ashes are +falling from heaven. The volcano is very, very angry." + +"Ashes? The volcano? I must dress at once. Light two more candles. No, +three! We can't have three candles burning. Don Francesco may be here +at any moment." + +The Duchess often laughingly described herself as "only a weak woman." +A certain number of persons concurred in that opinion. Just then she +was the most self-possessed inhabitant of Nepenthe. The disturbance of +nature left her undisturbed. Her intellect was naturally incurious as +to the habits of volcanoes; her soul, moreover, in good hands, her +conscience in excellent working order, as befitted a potential convert +to Catholicism. She could rely on a spiritual adviser who had instilled +into her mind a lofty sense of obedience and resignation. Don Francesco +would never desert her. He would arrive in due course, explaining why +God had allowed the volcano to behave in this unseemly fashion, and +brimming over with words of consolation for his daughter-to-be. God, if +so disposed, could work a miracle and drive away the plague, even as he +had sent it. Ashes or no ashes, all was for the best. Calmly she +waited. + +Out of doors, meanwhile, the shower went on without ceasing. It had +begun shortly after midnight; the ground was covered to the depth of +two inches. Nepenthe lay veiled in Cimmerian gloom, darker than +starless midnight--a darkness that could be felt; a blanket, as it were, +hot and breathless, weighing upon the landscape. All was silent. No +footfall could be heard in the streets; the powdery ashes, softer than +snow, absorbed every sound. And still they fell. Those few scared +natives whom necessity forced to go abroad crept about in fear of their +lives. They thought the end of the world had come. Terror-stricken, +they carried knives and revolvers in their pockets; they passed each +other distrustfully in the streets holding, in one hand, a lighted +torch or lantern, and in the other a handkerchief pressed to the face +for fear of suffocation. In one or two of the shop windows could be +discerned a light glimmering feebly as through the thickest fog. All +the ordinary sights and sounds of morning--the vehicles plying for hire, +the cracking of whips, the cries of the fish and fruit vendors--all were +gone. The deathly stillness was broken only by a clangour of the town +clock, tolling the hours into a darkened world. + +Half a dozen adventurous spirits had gathered together at the Club. +They called themselves adventurous. As a matter of fact they were +scared out of their wits and had gone there merely with a view to +leaning on each other for mutual support and courage. There was no +whisky drinking that morning, no cards, no scandal-mongering. They sat +round a table under an acetylene lamp, anxiously listening to a young +professor from Christiania who claimed to be versed in the higher +mathematics and was then occupied in calculating, by means of the +binomial theorem, how long it would take for the whole town of Nepenthe +to be submerged under ashes up to the roofs--presuming all the buildings +to be of equal height. He was a new-comer to the place and, for that +reason, rather a cheerful pessimist. He thought it quite possible that +before the second floors of the houses had been reached--granted, of +course, that none was higher or lower than the other--the wind might +change and carry the ashes elsewhere. His demonstration had a +depressing effect on the hearts of those who had lived longer on the +island. They rose from the table and sadly shook their heads, prepared +for the worst. They knew their sirocco. + +As morning wore on other stragglers entered the premises, muffled up to +the ears; they scattered ashes from their cloaks and hastily closed the +door behind them. More lamps were lighted. The news was not inspiring. +It was dark as ever outside; you could not see your hand before your +face; the shower had accumulated to an alarming extent. Some roofs had +fallen in under the weight of ashes; telegraphic communication with the +mainland was interrupted owing, it was supposed, to the snapping of the +cable in some submarine convulsion; a man had stumbled in the +market-place over the dead body of a woman--choked, no doubt; two of the +judge's Russian prisoners, unaccustomed to volcanic phenomena, had gone +stark staring mad and disembowelled one another with a carving knife. +Mr. Muhlen, who presently turned up in anything but his usual sprightly +humour, was furnished with a full and corrected version of this last +affair, to the effect that there were not two, but fourteen, of these +victims; that prior to their frenzied act they had partaken of bread +and salt and sung the national anthem; that the instrument chosen was +not a carving knife but a rusty chisel. None of his listeners seemed to +be greatly moved by what, under ordinary circumstances, would have been +a valuable contribution to the entertainment. They were waiting for the +appearance of their president, the Commissioner, the life and soul of +the place, who would be able to give them an official apology for this +scandalous outbreak of nature. The Commissioner, for once in his life, +failed to perform his duty. + +That unfortunate man was sitting at home, in the remote villa known as +the "Residency," profoundly troubled in mind. He leaned over his study +table, which was lighted by a lamp; his eyes peered dejectedly, through +the windows beyond, into the gloom. Before him lay the skeleton draft +of his annual report to the Nicaraguan Minister of Finance, a gentleman +who developed a passionate craving, once a year, to be informed of the +condition of Nepenthe in regard to matters such as shipping and trade +returns, zymotic diseases, and the methods locally employed for +combating beri-beri. + +The elaboration of this report had hitherto given Mr. Freddy Parker no +trouble whatever. It was an understood thing between himself and his +protector, Senor Pomponio de Vergara y Puyarola, that his labours need +not be otherwise than purely formal. To every one of the intelligent +queries on the part of a paternal government it had been his custom, +therefore, to append the magic word NIL. Banking system--NIL. Meat +export--NIL. Cotton industry--NIL. Agriculture--NIL. Canal traffic--NIL. +Teak trade--NIL. Emery mines--NIL. Fisheries--NIL. + +He could trust Senor de Vergara to arrange matters, in the event of any +complaint arising as to the unwarranted ambiguity or succinctness of +the Nepenthean Report. + +Bad news had just reached him; very bad news indeed. His friend and +protector had been stabbed to death, after the approved fashion of +Nicaraguan politicians, by a couple of assassins in the pay of that +minister's rival, a bankrupt tradesman who, desirous of bettering his +fortunes, conceived that he would make as good a Finance Minister as +anyone else and had, in fact, already usurped that post. Worse news +could hardly be imagined. The prognosis was most unfavourable. For Mr. +Parer shrewdly argued that a rival of the late Don Pomponio would look +askance at those whom His Excellency had exalted--at himself, for +instance. And what then? However conscientiously he might henceforward +edit the report, he realized that his position was no longer secure; he +was liable to be recalled at any moment--to cede his place to some +candidate of the opposing faction. Those damned republics! Or the post, +being a purely honorary one created expressly for himself by the +obliging and now defunct Don Pomponio, might be permanently abolished. +It was not a pleasant prospect. Mr. Freddy Parker was rather too old to +start knocking about the world again. He was losing what he called his +"nerve." What was to be done? + +He tugged at his beard and puffed furious clouds of smoke out of his +briar pipe. He thought of another grief--another source of anxiety. The +quarterly remissions forwarded to him by certain obscure but +respectable relatives in England, under the condition that he should +never again set foot in that land of honest men, had not arrived. It +was two weeks overdue. What had happened? Had they decided to cancel +it? They had threatened to do so ere now. And if so, how was he going +to live? It was a facer, that was. The equivalent of fifteen pounds +sterling was urgently necessary at that very moment. Fifteen pounds. +Who would lend him fifteen pounds? Keith? Not likely. Keith was a +miser--a Scotchman, ten to one. Koppen? He had once already tried to +touch him for a loan, with discouraging results. A most unsympathetic +millionaire. Almost offensive, the older bounder had been. Perhaps +somebody had let on about that bit of CREPE DE CHINE preserved at the +Residency, and its uses as a sociological document. How things got +about on Nepenthe! Where the Hell, then, was money to come from? + +Both these troubles, great in themselves, faded into insignificance +before a new and overwhelming sorrow. + +In a room directly overhead lay the dead body of his lady. She had +breathed her last on the previous midday, and it is more than likely +that the noise of the cannon-shots, reverberating through her chamber, +had accelerated her end; not the noise as such, for she was naturally a +rowdy woman and never felt comfortable save in an atmosphere of +domestic explosions and quarrels with servants, but the noise in its +social significance, the noise as demonstrating to her exhausted +consciousness that there was something wrong, something at the same +time of considerable importance--something she might never live to +comment on--happening in the market-place. In other words, it is highly +probable that her death had been hastened by the moral rather than the +physical shock of the noise; by disappointment; by the bitter +reflection that she would never survive to learn what this new scandal, +evidently an interesting one, was about. + +The doctor, for reasons which he deemed sufficient, had recommended a +speedy interment; it was fixed for that morning. The fall of ashes had +put the ceremony out of the question. There she lay. And in the room +below sat her bereaved stepbrother, distractedly gazing out of the +window upon the darkness of Erebus. + +It harmonized with the darkness of his mourning trousers, newly creased +but not newly purchased; and of his soul. He saw his worldly existence +menaced--tottering to its fall. All these catastrophes, so crushing, so +unexpected, filled him with a kind of primeval terror. Mr. Parker was +neither a devout believer nor the reverse. He was a fool and liable, as +such, under the stress of bodily or mental disturbance, to spasmodic +fits of abject fright which he mistook for religion. An attack of +indigestion, the failure of some pecuniary speculation, the demise of a +beloved stepsister--these various happenings, so dissimilar to one +another, had yet this feature in common, that they put the fear of God +into the otherwise empty brain of Mr. Parker. + +He had been in many tight corners, but never in so tight a corner as +this. Hardly ever. He thought of the lady lying dead upstairs and all +she had done towards establishing and consolidating their social +position; how she had economized for him, yes, and lied for him--better, +far better, than he could ever hope to lie. For she possessed that most +priceless of all gifts: she believed her own lies. She looked people +straight in the face and spoke from her heart; a falsehood, before it +left her lips, had grown into a flaming truth. She was a florid, +improvident liar. There was no classical parsimony about her +misstatements. They were copious baroque, and encrusted with pleasing +and unexpected tricks of ornamentation. That tropical redundancy for +which her person was renowned reflected itself likewise in her +temperament--in nothing more than the exuberance of her untruths which +were poured out in so torrential a flood, with such burning conviction +at the opulence of detail that persons who knew her well used to stand +aghast (Catholics had been known to cross themselves) at the fertility +of her constructive imagination, while the most hardened sceptics +protested that, even if her facts were wrong, there could be no doubt +as to her sincerity, her ingenuousness. Ah, she was a woman in a +thousand! Often had Mr. Parker sat at her feet, a respectful disciple, +listening spellbound and striving to acquire that secret--a secret which +was, after all, not so much art as nature. He could never hope to rival +her technique. + +That was because he could not look you in the face; because he +disbelieved not only his own lies, but those of other people--and not +only their lies, but their truths; because he distrusted everything and +everybody, and was duly distrusted in his turn. Nobody believed a word +he said, and some rude persons went so far as to tell him exactly what +they thought of him. They called him a liar in public and in private. +Such experiences are trying to one's nerve; they end in giving you a +shifty look. People who knew him well never took his word for granted, +and the more casual acquaintance would say that even if his facts were +correct now and then he could not help being a fraud all the same. + +And now she was gone, this lady who had saved him from countless small +annoyances, who had given him self-esteem and a kind of social +backbone. He stared into the darkness. Where was money to come +from--those miserable fifteen pounds, for example? What would happen? + +He almost decided upon praying, only he could not think of appropriate +words in which to appeal for this loan; it might seem to the Deity a +contemptuously small sum, not worth bothering the angels about. On the +other hand he dared not apply for more than he actually needed--not to +that quarter, at least--for fear of being found out. He was always being +found out, even by his earthly creditors. Besides, there lingered at +the back of his mind all the time certain doubts as to the efficacy of +applying to God for money or anything else. The whole thing might be a +farce. He remembered, with pain and grief, that he had already on +several occasions tried the prayer-system, like most other systems. And +alas, the results had invariably been NIL.... + +A visit from His Reverence the parroco was announced. + +This heroic priest, accompanied by two acolytes bearing torches, had +braved the downpour of ashes. He never shirked his duty. It was his +duty that morning to confer with Mr. Parker anent the delayed funeral +and other painfully material matters. For the deceased lady had not +deserted the creed of her fathers; she was an ardent Catholic--so ardent +that she professed great pain at her stepbrother's alien leanings and +had taken considerable trouble to convert him to her own way of +thinking. She used to say, in her flowery language, that his +contumacious attitude towards the true Faith gnawed at her +vitals--meaning, presumably, that it annoyed her. Often she pointed out +how many social and other advantages they would gain--living in a +Catholic country--if he, too, could bring himself to enter the field of +believers. In vain! The Commissioner had a knack of being +ultra-protestant on such occasions. + +Not that he greatly cared to what Church he belonged. But if nobody +made it worth his while--why, he remained an Englishman. He knew +perfectly well that the parroco, his lady's confessor, was anxious to +do something in the proselytizing line which might lower the prestige +of Don Francesco. And he was clever enough to realize that, by +embracing Catholicism at Torquemada's hands, he, the Official +Representative of Nicaragua, would be putting a feather in the priest's +cap. He was not going to put a feather in anybody's cap--not for +nothing. It was not good enough. Some strong leader of nations had once +remarked, "Every man his price." Mr. Parker liked that phrase; he was +deeply convinced of its veracity. He also had his price, and once, in a +moment of extreme financial embarrassment, he had delighted his +stepsister by announcing that he was prepared to consider the question +of conversion. He then named his price. It was a condition not to be +expressed by such terms as a gratified church might have been able to +concede--by some elevation to a higher sphere of influence or other +worldly favour; it was a figure baldly commercial, expressible, that +is, in pounds, shillings and pence. + +"You've got some cheek, Freddy," was all she could bring herself to +say. + +"My dear Lola, he can take it or leave it," the Commissioner had +replied, sulkily. + +His Reverence never found himself in the odious dilemma of either +taking it or leaving it, for the lady was wise enough not to divulge so +ignoble a proposition. + +But now, while the good priest uttered a few parting platitudes of +condolence, the other was revolving in his mind how negotiations--direct +negotiations, this time--could be opened up. He needed fifteen pounds; +well, one might be able to do a little juggling with the Club money for +that part of the business. It was necessary, above all, to devise some +means whereby the Nicaraguan Government might be induced to keep him at +his old post. Here was Torquemada. How could the fellow be turned to +account? + +"The Nuncio!" he suddenly thought. A Catholic republic like Nicaragua +was sure to have a Papal Nuncio whatever that might be; and if he +became a convert to the official faith of that country, the Nuncio +would be delighted and might whisper in the ear of the President a few +words commending his act and requesting that so good a servant of the +Church should not be despoiled of his post. And if the President, +himself a Catholic, could be brought to share this view, then he, +Freddy Parker, could snap his fingers at the machinations of Senor +Vergara's successor. + +He decided to show some signs of devotion to what he had been +accustomed to call the grossest of superstitions; to reveal symptoms of +latent Roman proclivities. Grief seemed to have sharpened his wits, for +an inspiration came to him. After the sordid and melancholy details of +the funeral had been discussed yet again--it was to take place as soon +as ever the state of the sky would allow of it--Mr. Parker, pointing to +the blackened world outside, made an oracular remark. + +"Something must be done," he said. + +His companion agreed, very heartily. But soon he drew a deep sigh. How +could a volcanic eruption be stopped? In other words, what must be +done? + +"Let me suggest something, parroco. Why not organize a procession at +once, a penitential procession? Such things take place during eruptions +on the mainland. Why not here?" + +It was the most tactful and diplomatic proposal that the Commissioner +had ever made. A thundering good tip, in fact. How proud his Lola would +have been, had she heard him make it! A flash of inspiration--and he was +actually following it up. The effect was instantaneous. At the sound of +the word "procession" the other's thin lips relaxed, and into his +ferrety eyes there came a gentler look. He was pleased, infinitely +pleased. The Protestant Commissioner betraying only too plainly the +heart of a Catholic--that augured well. But difficulties, apparently +insurmountable, presented themselves. + +"That thought, Signor Parker, coming from you, gives me pleasure beyond +words. But I question whether a procession can be formed. Even the +priests, most of them, would not care to attend. As to the populace--who +is going to risk his life in the midst of this calamity? We might all +be choked to death. Not that I would hesitate to play my becoming +part!" + +"You know your people--how inquisitive they are. If you toll the church +bells a certain number are sure to gather in the market-place in order +to learn, even at risk of their lives, what is happening. When they see +a torchlight procession being formed, you will obtain a sufficient +quantity, I feel sure, to carry the Holy Image of the Saint; and some +to spare. Also, I see no reason why the priests should be present in +full strength. Toll the bells, parroco! You will get your men." + +His Reverence was thinking hard. At last he said: + +"Your project appeals to me. It does credit to your heart. It would do +credit to our island. I will try to arrange it. But if--" + +"You mean, don't you, if the ashes continue to fall, notwithstanding +our expiatory demonstration? Let me see. There was that disgraceful +tumult in the town yesterday. Saint Dodekanus is perhaps too deeply +vexed against his people to concede them a grace under such +circumstances. I imagine him to be very displeased with us just now. +That being the case, the fall of ashes might well be permitted to +continue for our castigation, despite the penitential act. What do you +think?" + +Nobody knows what the parroco thought. It was not his habit to think +aloud, much less to express opinions on ticklish arguments such as +these. But he could corroborate the fact with a clear conscience. + +"It was indeed enough to anger a saint in Heaven! Seven more of the +wounded have succumbed to their injuries; three of them little +children. Ah, these deeds of violence and bloodshed, for which Nepenthe +was ever infamous! When will the peace of God descend upon our island?" + +Mr. Parker had no idea when that might happen. He was not particularly +keen about the peace of God--he was keen about keeping his job. None the +less, he managed to move his head up and down, in a decidedly becoming +fashion. + +"And now," concluded the parroco, "with your kind permission, I will +take my leave, to confer with the clergy if I can discover any of them, +as to what can be done towards forming a procession. I confess that the +more I think upon your idea, Signor Parker, the more I like it. If only +we can find a sufficient number to participate!" + +"Have no fear of that. Only toll the bells. You will get your men. This +eruption is enough to make anybody religious. I mean--you know what I +mean, parroco." + +The acolytes having rekindled their torches His Reverence, a happier +man, stepped boldly out of doors and was swallowed up in the murk. + +This is a succinct and faithful account of the genesis of that +procession which was to become famous in Nepenthean annals. However +much, in later years, certain envious folks claim to be the originators +of the project it was, from first to last, the Commissioner's idea. +Honour to whom honour is due. He deserved, and took, all credit for it. +Meanwhile he sat down at his table once more, and stared into the +pitchy darkness. + +Not long afterwards, the sound of bells announced that something was +being done. Men looked out of their windows and saw flickering lights +moving about the gloom. The flames grouped themselves into definite +arrangements; a procession was being formed. As the parroco had +foretold it was but sparsely attended in the beginning; out of +sixty-five priests and canons of the church, only fourteen found it +convenient to attend; another dozen, however, were presently shamed +into taking their places in the ranks. The same with the followers. +Their number gradually increased. For the bells did the work of +arousing curiosity; they tolled plangently into the night. + +Stranger pageant never trod Nepenthe. Some thoughtful person had +discovered that umbrellas might be used with advantage. Umbrellas were +therefore utilized by all save the priests, the choristers, +torch-bearers, and those carrying the statue of the Saint who, for +reasons of personal dignity or expediency, preferred the other method. +They chanted their psalms and litanies through handkerchiefs, knowing +full well that their music would be none the less pleasing to the Saint +for being more than usually nasal in tone. Thus, with soundless +footfalls, they perambulated the streets and outskirts of the town, +gathering fresh recruits as they went. + +And still the ashes fell. + +Viewing this cortege of awe-struck innocents braying into the blackness +under their umbrellas at the heels of a silver-plated idol (not yet +paid for), an intelligent God might well be proud of his workmanship. +So thought the parroco. He was undismayed. Come what might, he had an +explanation ready. Saint Dodekanus, if the ashes continued to fall, was +only showing his displeasure; he was perfectly justified in letting his +wrath be known for the better guidance of mankind. Certain of the +younger priests, on the other hand, were growing nervous at the +prospect of a possible failure of the procession. They began to blame +His Reverence for what he had given them to understand was his own +idea. For two hours they had now been in movement; they had swallowed a +hatful of ashes. And yet no sign from Heaven. The sky appeared darker +than ever. Many of the followers, exhausted, dropped out of the +procession and returned sadly to their homes. They thought the +speculation was going to turn out badly. The others deemed in not +impossible that the Saint could not see them through so thick a +curtain. Well, then, he might hear them. They chanted more furiously. + +The sound must have reached Heaven, at last, for a miracle occurred. +The gloom decreased in density. Men looked up and beheld a sickly +radiance overhead--it was the sun, ever so far away; it shone as when +seen through thickly smoked glasses. Then a veil seemed to be +withdrawn. The light grew clearer--the song of the penitents jubilant +with hope. Sullen gleams, now, pierced the murky air. Outlines of trees +and houses crept furtively into their old places. The fall of ashes had +almost ceased. With a wrench, as it seemed, the final covering was +drawn away. The land lay flooded in daylight. + +That paean of joy and thanksgiving which ought to have greeted this +divine largesse, died on the lips of the beholders when they saw the +state of their island. Nepenthe was hardly recognizable. The Saint had +lifted a mantle from Heaven only to reveal the desolation on earth. +Ashes everywhere. Trees, houses, the fertile fields, the mountain +slopes--all were smothered under a layer of monotonous pallor. They knew +what it meant. It meant ruin to their crops and vineyards. None the +less, they raised a shout, a half-hearted shout, of praise. For +Nepentheans are born politicians and courteous by nature. It is their +heritage from the Good Duke Alfred to "keep smiling." A shout was +expected of them under the circumstances; it costs nothing and may even +do good, inasmuch as Saint Dodekanus could remove the ashes as easily +as he had sent them. Why not shout? + +"A miracle, a miracle!" the cry went up. "Long life to our patron!" + +A poor tribute; but the Saint took note of it. Half an hour had barely +passed ere the sky grew cloudy. Moist drops began to fall. It was the +first rain for many weeks, and foreign visitors, accustomed to think of +Nepenthe as a rainless land, were almost as interested in the watery +shower as in that of the ashes. Mud, such mud as the oldest midwife +could not remember, encumbered the roofs, the fields, the roadways. It +looked as if the whole island were plastered over with a coating of +liquid chocolate. Now, if the shower would only continue-- + +Suddenly it ceased. The sky grew clear. + +Saint Dodekanus had often been accused of possessing a grain of malice. +Some went so far as to say he had the Evil Eye. It was by no means the +first time in his long career that the natives had found cause to +complain of a certain rancour in his temperament--of certain spiteful +viperish acts to which the priests, and they alone, were able to give a +benevolent interpretation. Now their wrath blazed out against the +celestial Patron. "He's not fit for his job," said some; "let's get a +new saint! The ruffian, the son of an impure mother--up to his tricks, +was he? Ah, the cut-throat, the Saracen, the old paederast: into the +ditch with him!" + +During a brief moment his fate hung in the balance. For it was plain +that the ashes, if unwetted, might ultimately have been blown away by +the wind. But what was going to happen when all this mud, baked by the +sun into the hardness of brick, covered the island? + +Perhaps the Saint was only putting their tempers to the test. The +experiment of another shout was worth trying. One could always punish +him later on. + +So feeble was the noise that Saint Dodekanus must have had uncommonly +good ears. He had. And soon showed his real feelings. Rain fell once +more. Instead of diminishing it grew more violent, accompanied by warm +blasts of wind. There was sunshine overhead, but the peaks were +shrouded in scudding vapours, trees bent under the force of the wind; +the sea, a welter of light and shade, was dappled with silvery patches +under the swiftly careering clouds. Soon there came a blinding +downpour. Gullies were blocked up with mud; rills carried tons of it +into the sea. Then the gale died down; the sun beamed out of a bright +evening sky. The miraculous shower was over. + +Men walked abroad and recognized their beloved Nepenthe once more. It +glowed in the tenderest hues. The events of morning and midday were +like a bad dream. Everything sparkled with unaccustomed brilliance; the +land was refreshed--swept clean; the sea alone remained discoloured to a +dingy brown. Truly, as the Commissioner--once more a sound +Protestant--remarked in later years: "The old rotter came up to the +scratch that time." So clear and pleasant was the air that it seemed as +if the wind had actually veered to the north. But no. It still blew +from the other quarter--the old familiar sirocco. Which proved that the +shower of ashes had not been "carried elsewhere," as the youthful +teacher of mathematics had prognosticated. It had not been carried +anywhere. It simply ceased to fall, the volcano having momentarily run +out of its stock of objectionable materials. + +The Clubmen therefore, calling to mind the discussion of the morning, +were led to revise their opinion as to that gentleman's intelligence. +They remembered one or two things. They remembered that even when +Heavenly Powers are not known to be directly interested in the event, +eruptions now and then come to an end quite irrespective of the wind--a +contingency which had not been foreseen in the acute young +Scandinavian's computations. + +"That comes," they said, "of studying the higher mathematics...." + +For their miraculous deliverance from a shower of volcanic ashes the +islanders gave all credit, as might have been expected, to their Patron +Saint. And this proves how inadequately causes and effects are +understood, here on earth. For the priests, the most intelligent +section of the populace, knew perfectly well that but for the orders of +the parroco no procession could have taken place. The Saint would have +remained locked up in his musty shrine, without the faintest chance of +performing a miracle of any kind. They argued, consequently, that Saint +Dodekanus got the credit for what was really the parroco's notion. And +Torquemada, thinking over the day's proceedings, was driven to confess +that he was indebted for the suggestion to the fertile brain of the +Nicaraguan Representative; in other words that he, the parroco, was +praised for what was really the Commissioner's idea. And it is evident +that if Mr. Parker's lady had not died from the effects of a +mosquito-sting, that gentleman would never have been in such a complex +funk as to suggest a procession to the worthy priest. + +Thus it came about that the Commissioner, the Parish Priest, and the +Patron Saint got the credit for what was really an insect's work. + +Which shows how a mosquito can cure an eruption. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXIV + + + + + +Everybody was drunk that night in honour of the Saint's bounty, though +Miss Wilberforce reached the climax of her activities at the early hour +of 4 p.m.--during the torchlight procession. + +An uproar had been generated at the Club; chairs were broken, bottles +smashed, and sporting prints kicked about--all on account of a comical +but rather scurrilous speech contrasting Europe with Australasia by a +new-comer, a member of the New Zealand House of Representatives, who +limped home not long afterwards with a damaged shinbone and black eye. +The more violent parties had been ejected during that incident, or +carried to their lodgings. Only about half the usual number was +left--all moderates, so far as drinking was concerned, but all more or +less screwed that day as befitted the occasion. There was the +card-table group, where Mr. Muhlen, with heightened colour in his +cheeks, was losing money in so brilliant a fashion that everyone swore +he must be on the verge of coming into a legacy or making some COUP +with a rich woman. In another room the so-called bawdy section, +presided over by the dubious Mr. Hopkins, were discussing topics not +adapted to polite ears. The artistic group, sadly thinned by the +ejection of four of its more imaginative and virile members who had +distinguished themselves in the fray, now consisted solely of two +youngsters, a black-and-white man and a literary critic; they sat in a +corner by themselves, talking about colour-values in maudlin strains. + +The ordinary club-group had, as usual, installed themselves in the most +comfortable chairs on the balcony. They were boozing steadily, like +gentlemen, and having no end of fun with the poor little Norwegian +professor and his miscalculations. One of them--a venerable toper of +Anacreontic youthfulness known as Charlie who turned up on Nepenthe at +odd intervals and whom the oldest inhabitant of the place had never +seen otherwise than in a state of benevolent fuddle--was saying to him: + +"Instead of filling yourself up with whisky in that disgusting fashion, +my friend, you ought to travel. Then you wouldn't make such an +exhibition of yourself as you did this afternoon over those ashes. Talk +about volcanoes! Ever seen the Lake of Pitch in Trinidad? Queer place, +Trinidad. You never know where you are. Though I can't say I saw much +of it myself. I was asleep most of the time, gentlemen, and often +tight. Mostly both. All angles and things, as you sail along. To get an +idea of that place, you must take a banana, for instance, and cut it in +half, and cut that in half again, and that half in half again--the +banana, mind you, must always remain the same size--or suppose you keep +peeling a potato, and peeling, and peeling--well, Mr. Professor, what +are you laughing at now?" + +"I was thinking what an interesting map one could draw of Trinidad if +it's like that." + +"Interesting? That's not the word. It's Hell. I wouldn't care to take +on that job, not even to oblige my poor old mother who died fifty years +ago. Ever been to Trinidad, Mr. Richards? Or you, Mr. White? Or +anybody? What, has nobody been to Trinidad? You ought to travel more, +gentlemen. How about you, Mr. Samuel?" + +"Never further West than the Marble Arch. But a friend of mine kept a +ranch somewhere down there. One day he shot a skunk. Yes, Mr. White, a +skunk." + +"A skunk? I'm blowed. What on earth ever for did he do that? What did +he want with a skunk? I thought they were protected by law to keep down +rattlesnakes. That's so, isn't it, Charlie?" + +"Snakes. You should see them in Trinidad. Snakes. Great Scot! It's a +queer place, is Trinidad. All angles and things--" + +"I don't think one can talk about a place being all angles and things, +unless--" + +"Tell me, Charlie, what did the fellow on the ranch want to do with +that rattlesnake?" + +"Couldn't say, my son. Maybe he thought of sending it to his mother. Or +perhaps he didn't want the skunk to get hold of its tail: see?" + +"I see." + +"They're very sensitive about their tails. As ticklish as any young +girl, I'm told." + +"As bad as all that, are they?" + +"I don't think one can talk about angles when describing an island or +even a continent, except in a figurative and flowery fashion. As a +teacher of geometry, it is my business to dwell among angles; and the +thirty-five boys in my class will bear witness to the fact that my +relations with angles, great and small, are above reproach. I admit +that there are angles everywhere, and that a man who really likes their +company will stumble against them in the most unexpected places. But +they are sometimes hard to see, unless one deliberately looks for them. +I think Charlie must have been looking for them in Trinidad." + +"I said angles AND THINGS, and I always stick to what I say. AND +THINGS. You will be good enough, Mr. Professor, to draw your map +accordingly." + +"Gentlemen! I rise to a point of order. Our Indian friend here is +greatly annoyed. He has been accused of wearing stays. At his urgent +request I have convinced myself, by personal inspection, that he wears +nothing of the kind. He is naturally slim-waisted, as befits a worthy +representative of the noble Hairyan race. It has also been suggested +that he loses caste by his present mode of conduct. He begs me to say +that, being a Jamshi-worshipper, he doesn't care a brass farthing about +caste. Thirdly, he has been blamed in certain quarters for his +immoderate indulgence in Parker's poison. Let me tell you, gentlemen, +in my capacity as Vice-President, that for the last four thousand years +his family has enjoyed a special dispensation from the Great Mogul, +authorizing the eldest son to drink whatever he damn well pleases. Our +friend here happens to be the third son. But that is obviously not his +fault. If it were, he would have come forward with an apology long ago. +Gentlemen! I can't speak fairer than that. Whoever says I'm not a +gentleman--why, he isn't one either." + +"Hear, hear! I never knew you were an ornithologist, Richards." + +"Nor did I--not till this moment. But when it's a question of defending +the honour of a Club-member I always rise to the occasion. Some +things--they simply make my blood boil. Look at this REFEREE: two weeks +out of date! How the blazes is a man--" + +"I say, Charlie, what did the fellow on the ranch want to do with that +skunk? Something about tickling, wasn't it?" + +"Hush, my boy. We can't talk about it here. You're not old enough yet. +I don't think I ought to tell you. It's too funny for words...." + +"You're a black-and-white man and I'm a writer, and really, you know, +we're a cut above all those sots on the balcony. Now just be reasonable +for a moment. Look here. Have you ever thought about the impossibility +of realizing colour description in landscape? It's struck me a good +deal lately, here, with this blue sea, and those orange tints on the +mountain, and all the rest of it. Take any page by a well-known +writer--take a description of a sunset by Symonds, for example. Well, he +names all the gorgeous colours, the yellow and red and violet, or +whatever it may be, as he saw them. But he can't make you see +them--damned if he can. He can only throw words at your head. I'm very +much afraid, my dear fellow, that humanity will never get its +colour-values straightened out by means of verbal symbols." + +"I always know when a man is drunk, even when I'm drunk myself." + +"When?" + +"When he talks about colour-values." + +"I believe you're right. I'm feeling a bit muzzy about the legs, as if +I couldn't move. A bit fuzzy--" + +"Muzzy, I think you said." + +"Fuzzy." + +"Muzzy. But we needn't quarrel about it, need we? I shall be sick in a +minute, old man." + +"It's rather hard on a fellow to be always misunderstood. However, as I +was saying when you interrupted me, I am feeling slightly wobblish in +the peripatetic or ambulatorial department. But my head's all right. +Now do be serious, for a change. You don't seem to catch my drift. This +blue sea, and those orange tints on the mountains, I mean to say--how +are they going to be held fast by the optic apparatus? The lens, you +understand. I want to be able to shove them into a sketch-book, like +you fellows. Well, how? That's what I want to know. How to turn my +retina into a canvas." + +"Rot, my good sir." + +"It may be rot to you, but it strikes me as rather unfortunate, all the +same, when you come to think of it. This blue sea, I mean, and those +orange tints and all that, you know. Take a sunrise by John Addington. +Of course, as a matter of fact, we ought both to have been born in +another age--an age of sinecures. Why are sinecures extinct? I feel as +if I could be Governor of Madagascar at this moment." + +"I feel as if you were getting slightly intoxicated." + +"That's me. But it's only my legs. My head is astonishingly clear. And +I do wish you would try, just for once in a way, to follow my meaning. +Be reasonable, for a change! I mean to say that a man has talents for +all sorts of things. I, for example, have pronounced views upon +agriculture. But what's the use of farming without capital? What I mean +to say is this: we see the blue sea and the orange tints on the +mountains, and all that, I mean, and we don't seem to realize, I mean, +that we may die at any moment and never see them again. How few people +grasp that simple fact! It's enough to make one sick. Or do you think +it's a laughing matter?" + +"Bally rotten, I call it. You're quite right. People don't realize +things the way they ought, except in a few selected moments. They live +like animals. I shall be sick in a minute, old man." + +"Like animals. Good Lord! You've hit the nail on the head this time. +How true that is. Like animals. Like animals. Like animals." + +"I know what we want. We want fresh air. No more Parker's poison for +me. Let's take a stroll." + +"I would if I could. But I can't get off this chair, damn it. I shall +fall down if I move an inch. I can hardly turn my head round, as it is. +Awfully sorry. You don't mind, do you?" + +"Gad! That's awkward. Couldn't we take your chair along with us, +somehow? I'm going to be sick, I tell you, this very minute." + +"Not here, not here! Third on the left. But surely, my dear fellow, you +can put it off a little longer? Can't you be reasonable, for once in +your life? Just for once in your life? Do listen to what those +inebriated lunatics are saying on the balcony...." + +"What did you do to that skunk, Charlie?" + +"Not if I know it, young man. I promised my mother I'd never tell. +Another day, perhaps, when I've got a little whiskey inside me. It's +too funny for words." + +"You oughtn't to go tickling young girls, Charlie. It's not polite, at +your age...." + +They all cleared out, as it seemed, after midnight; some on all fours, +many of them fairly perpendicular. But when the serving lad entered the +premises in the sober light of morning, to clear up the debris, he was +surprised to perceive a human form reclining under a table. It was the +young Norwegian professor. He lay there wide awake, with disheveled +hair and an inspired gleam in his eye, tracing on the floor, with the +point of a corkscrew, what looked like a tangle of parallelograms and +conic sections. He said it was a map of Trinidad. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXV + + + + + +As to Miss Wilberforce--she was becoming a real problem. + +Once again she had shocked the Faithful. She had misconducted herself +by interrupting the torchlight procession with some of those usual or +unusual antics, a detailed description of which, while entertaining to +a few lost souls, would certainly mortify the majority of decent folks. +The cup of endurance was full, overbrimming. Once again she had passed +the night in the lock-up. Questioned as to her motives for this +particular incident, she artlessly blamed the darkness which misled +her, she said, into the regrettable delusion that it was night; "and at +night, you know...." + +This, as Signor Malipizzo observed with his usual legal acumen, might +pass for an explanation but nevermore for an excuse. How much longer, +he continued, with a fine Ciceronian gesture of eloquent +indignation--how much longer would the foreign colony on Nepenthe endure +the presence in their midst of such a disgrace to womanhood? + +Thus spake the judge, well aware of what was expected from a man in his +position. In his heart he desired nothing less than her departure; he +was charmed with her disturbing influence; he hoped she would live a +hundred years on the island. In the first place he received occasional +gifts in kind from various grocers and wine-merchants who enriched +themselves by supplying her at preposterous prices with intoxicants, +and who thought by these subtle tactics to retain him as an ally in +their cause. Secondly and chiefly, every new scandal of this nature +gave him a fresh opportunity of consigning her, temporarily, to the +lock-up. Only temporarily. Because Mr. Keith would be sure to bail her +out again in the morning, which meant another fifty francs in his +pocket. + +This is exactly what had just taken place. Mr. Keith had bailed her +out, for the thirty-fourth time. She was at liberty once more, sobering +down. + +Both the Duchess and Madame Steynlin pitied her, as only one woman can +pity another. Often the prayed to their respective Gods, Lutheran and +High Church, that she might be led to see the error of her ways or, +failing that, removed by some happy accident from the island or, +failing that, run over by a passing vehicle and injured--injured not +dangerously, but merely to such an extent as to necessitate her +permanent seclusion from society. Other careless folk were maimed by +the furious driving of the Nepentheans; it was a common form of +accident. Miss Wilberforce--the eye-sore, the scandal of her +sex--remained intact. Some impish deity seemed to guide her wayward +footsteps. + +Had she been a person of low extraction there would have been no +difficulty in dealing with her. But she was so obviously a lady--she had +such obviously rich and influential connections in England! These +people, however glad to have her out of the way, might object if +violent measures were taken by persons who, after all, had no right to +interfere in her affairs. And the situation was rendered none the less +complex by the attitude of Miss Wilberforce herself. She was a Tartar. +She felt that all men's hands were against her. She used her tongue to +good purpose and, at a pinch, her teeth and claws. The policemen of +Nepenthe could bear witness to that fact. Drunk, she had a perfectly +blistering flow of invective at command. Sober, she was apt to indulge +in a dignified bestiality of logic that cut like a knife. It was only +in the intermediate stage that she was affable and human. But to catch +her in that intermediate stage was extremely difficult. It was of such +very brief duration. + +They tried to tempt her with the prospect of being repatriated. +Strenuously she opposed the notion, on grounds of health. She argued +that she had come to the South at the bidding of her English +doctor--which was true enough, that grave personage having been urgently +pressed by the family to make a suggestion; a return to England, she +declared, would be the death of her. If any attempt were made to +interfere with her liberty in this manner, she would appeal to the +local Court for protection. + +Then the project of sending her to an Inebriates' Home on the mainland +was mooted. A sprightly young clergyman, not long resident on Nepenthe, +volunteered for the delicate task of persuading the lady to take this +step; it would be given out that she was merely undergoing a "rest +cure." The sprightly young clergyman started on his mission full of +bright expectations. He returned anon, looking prematurely aged. Nobody +could get a word out of him at first; he seemed top have become +afflicted with a partial paralysis of the tongue. After babbling +childishly for an hour or so he fell silent altogether, and it was not +till next morning that he recovered full powers of speech. Wild horses, +he then announced, would not drag form his lips what had passed at the +interview. + +As a last resource it was decided to inaugurate a sanatorium on the +island for her especial benefit, with a trained nurse permanently in +attendance; during her ever-decreasing spells of sobriety the place, +together with the nurse, could be utilized for needle-classes and so +forth. Money was required. A committee of ladies and gentlemen +collected a certain small amount, but their hopes did not rise high +till the day when the Duchess broached the subject to her countryman, +Mr. van Koppen, after inveigling him into what she called "a friendly +teat-a-teat." Surfeited to bursting-point with his favourite tea-cakes, +the millionaire was in a lovely humour. He declared his readiness, then +and there, to subscribe half a million francs to the scheme if--if his +good friend Mr. Keith would make himself responsible for a similar sum, +or even a thousandth part of it. + +"Half a million francs--what's that, Duchess, as the price of a smile +from yourself? Cheap. Dirt cheap!" + +"Another one?" queried the lady. + +"Well, just one. I can't swallow any more. But I can still chew." + +So fatuously fond was he of this particular variety of condiment that, +on their account alone, he would have imported the Duchess and her +entire establishment into America. For all that, old Koppen was no +fool. Half a million buttered tea-cakes could not impair the lively +workings of a brain which had long ago mapped out a swift and sure path +to worldly success. He had wind of this project; his answer was +carefully prepared. It was a mathematical certainty that not one cent +of those half-million francs would ever leave his pocket. For he knew +what the Committee did not know--the real character of his friend Keith. +Keith was a good fellow but a hopeless crank; Keith was perfectly +capable of impoverishing himself in order to keep Miss Wilberforce out +of prison. As to subscribing to the schemes of a pack of meddling fools +who proposed to intern the dear lady--Keith would see them all damned +first. This is how Mr. van Koppen, a profound student of human nature, +would have argued, had he lacked the opportunity of discussing the +question with his good friend. As a matter of fact he had enjoyed that +opportunity only a few days ago. He had warned Keith of what was +coming, and had found him equally alert to the plans of the Committee +and more desirous than himself, if possible, of frustrating them. They +had chuckled vastly over a bottle of dry sparkling Nepenthe in +anticipation of the event. + +"Trust me," said Keith. "I'll talk their heads off." + +"I'm glad I shan't be there!" thought the American. + +He knew his good friend. Keith could be decidedly fatiguing, especially +when dead sober. He had all the Scotchman's passion for dissecting the +obvious, discovering new facets in the commonplace, and squeezing the +last drop out of a foregone conclusion. + +It was a thousand pities that the Duchess, in the exuberance of her +triumph, spread abroad the news of the millionaire's promise. For that +news had an unfortunate and unexpected result. The Committee, which up +till then had consisted of eight reputable members, now swelled, +rapidly and mysteriously, to fourteen. Six new gentlemen, including the +unspeakable Mr. Hopkins, got themselves enrolled, and all six of them, +as was afterwards made manifest, were persons of questionable +integrity. By dint of small donations to the fund varying from five to +fifteen francs, they had contrived to have their names put down; it was +worth while, they thought, to risk a small sum on the chance of getting +a slice out of old Koppen's half-million which could not possibly be +used up in the rent or purchase of a three-roomed Sanatorium. + +A committee of ladies and gentlemen, formed for charitable purposes, +should be like Caesar's wife. This one had come to resemble the spouse +of Claudius. Had the upright and intelligent Mr. Freddy Parker still +been its guiding spirit, he would soon have weeded out these +undesirable elements and kept the pickings for himself. But Mr. Parker, +since his lady's illness, seemed to be withdrawn from all worldly +concerns. He had become invisible. And now that the lady was dead he +would presumably grow more invisible than ever. It was a severe blow to +all concerned; to nobody more than to the Commissioner himself when, on +emerging into society from his mourning retirement, he divined what a +chance he had missed. + +Every single member of the small sub-committee who came, in rather a +formal group, to communicate to Mr. Keith the terms of the +millionaire's offer and to solicit his participation in the scheme, +purposed to attend the funeral of Mr. Parker's lady. It was the right +thing to do. That impressive function, already a day overdue, had been +irrevocably fixed for 10.30 a.m. at the instance of the Chief Medical +Officer of Health. Accordingly they reached the Villa Khismet at the +matutinal hour of 9 a.m., convinced that the short interval would +suffice to cajole out of Mr. Keith a sum sufficient to bind old Koppen +to his promise. + +It struck them afterwards that this was their flagrant, initial +mistake. They ought to have controlled their impatience and waited for +a more opportune occasion. + +And they would have waited, but for the fact that Mr. Hopkins, a person +of dubious motives and antecedents, had insinuated himself into the +deputation not without a purpose of his own. This gentlemen insisted +that delay was fatal. Mr. Keith, he argued, would understand their +impatience. The millionaire was sailing in a day or two. One might +never get that cheque cashed, or even signed, before he left Nepenthe. +And then? Why, then the scheme might fall through and--he added to +himself--how was he going to get his share of the plunder? + +The others, the respectable ones, gave way. Vainly they remonstrated. +Vainly they pointed out that old Koppen was not a man to go back on his +word; that a cheque could be made out in America as well as anywhere +else; that the crux of the question was not the millionaire but his +good friend Keith; that they might spoil all their chances by +approaching the latter at such an unseasonable hour of the day. It was +weak of them. + +They ought to have waited. For Keith was fond of solitude at all times, +and any one of his dozen gardeners could have told them that, like +every other self-respecting scholar, he was in the habit of +breakfasting not earlier than 9.30, and dangerous to approach before +that meal. Or they might have made enquiries concerning his mode of +life among his fellow-countrymen on Nepenthe. The bibliographer, for +instance, would have informed them that Keith was "generally sick about +eleven"--meaning, by this playful nonsense, to insinuate that it was not +safe to disturb him till after that hour. Be that as it may, he was +certainly irritable before breakfast-time on every single day of the +year and, as it happened, irritable beyond the common measure on this +particular morning, because the downpour of the previous afternoon had +dashed to pieces--among other material damage--the tender blooms of +certain priceless ipomaeas. That alone was enough to infuriate an +archangel. Moreover, like everybody else--he always conformed to +custom--he had been slightly tipsy overnight. This had the singular +effect of making him glum, ceremonious, and ready to take offence. + +Here, now was this pack of officious idiots blundering in upon him. +Under ordinary circumstances he would have tried to be polite. As it +was, he could hardly bring himself to give them a civil word of +welcome. They caught him on his way from the bath to the garden--to a +succulent breakfast under his favourite pine-tree within view of the +Tyrrhenian; and his own flowered silk dressing-gown and +gold-embroidered Turkish slippers contrasted oddly with the solemn +vestments, savouring of naphthaline, which they had donned for the +funeral. After the barest of apologies for a costume which, he ventured +to think, was as suitable as any other for a gentleman at that hour of +the morning, he bade them be seated and listened to what the speaker +had to say--blinking ominously the while through his spectacles, like an +owl with the sun in its eyes. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXVI + + + + + +It was a long and rambling exposition. + +Miss Wilberforce must be protected against herself. They came to him +for a contribution, however small, which would enable Mr. van Koppen to +fulfil his promise. It was not a question of meddlesomeness. It was a +question of putting an end to a crying public scandal. Miss Wilberforce +spent her days in sleeping, and her nights in shocking the population +of Nepenthe. The lady should be temporarily secluded in her own +interests; she was not fit to be left alone; it was an act of charity +to do what one could towards improving her health and prolonging her +life. They were out for a philanthropic object--to assist in helping a +fellow creature. Miss Wilberforce must be protected against herself. +Mr. van Koppen's half-million would enable them to compass this end. +His own contribution, however small, would enable Mr. van Koppen to +fulfil his promise. Miss Wilberforce must be protected-- + +He quite understood. Miss Wilberforce must be protected against +herself. And he disagreed heartily. Nobody must be protected against +himself. The attitude of a man towards his fellows should be that of +non-intervention, of benevolent egotism. Every person of healthy +digestion was aware of that cardinal truth. Unfortunately persons of +healthy digestions were not as common as they might be. That was why +straight thinking, on these and other subjects, was at a discount. +Nobody had a right to call himself well-disposed towards society until +he had grasped the elementary fact that the only way to improve the +universe was to improve oneself, and to leave one's neighbour alone. +The best way to begin improving oneself was to keep one's own bowels +open, and not trouble about those of anybody else. Turkey rhubarb, in +fact. The serenity of outlook thereby attained would enable a man to +perceive the futility of interfering with the operation of natural +selection. + +The speaker, he went on, had dropped the word charity. Had the tribe of +Israel cultivated a smattering of respect for physiology or any other +useful science instead of fussing about supernatural pedigrees, they +would have been more cautious as to their diet. Had they been careful +in the matter of dietary, their sacred writings would never have seen +the light of day. Those writings, a monument of malnutrition and faulty +digestive processes, were responsible for three-quarters of what was +called charity. Charity was responsible for the greater part of human +mischief and misery. The revenues of the private charities of London +alone exceeded five million sterling annually. What were these revenues +expended upon? On keeping alive an incredible number of persons who +ought to be dead. What was the result of keeping these people alive? A +deterioration of the whole race. Charity consisted in setting a premium +on bodily ill-health and mental inefficiency. Charity was an Oriental +nightmare; an endeavour to raise the week to the level of the strong; +an incitement to improvidence. Charity disturbed the national +equilibrium; it lowered the standard of mankind instead of raising it. +Charity was an unmitigated nuisance which had increased, was +increasing, and ought to be diminished. + +By way of varying the phraseology, but not the thing, they had called +themselves philanthropists. The meaning of that venerable word had +decayed of late in characteristic fashion. Prometheus, the archetype, +brought fire from Heaven to comfort certain people who had the wit to +appreciate its uses. He did not waste his time wet-nursing the unfit, +like a modern philanthropist. What was a modern philanthropist? He was +a fellow who was always bothering you to do something for somebody +else. He appealed to your purse for the supposed welfare of some pet +degenerate. Prometheus appealed to your intelligence for the real +welfare of rational beings. A rich man found it extremely simple, no +doubt, to sign a cheque. But an act was not necessarily sensible +because it happened to be simple. People ought to dominate their +reflexes. Prometheus did not choose the simplest course--he chose the +wisest, and found it a pretty tough job, too. That alone proved him to +have been a man of sound digestion and robust health. Had it been +otherwise, indeed, he would never have endured that vulture--business +for so long. + +The deputation exchanged glances, puzzled by this pompous and peevish +exordium. It did not promise well; it sounded quite unlike Mr. Keith's +usually bland address. Perhaps he had not yet breakfasted. "We ought to +have waited," they thought. One of the listeners was so annoyed that he +began: + +"A paradox, Mr. Keith, is not necessarily sensible, because it happens +to be simple"--but was overborne by that gentleman, who proceeded +calmly: + +"So much for generalities. Now Miss Wilberforce is a lady of +independent means and of a certain age. She is not an infant, to be +protected against herself or against others; she has reached years of +indiscretion. Like a good many sensible persons she lives in this +country. Of course a residence here has its drawbacks--very grave +drawbacks, some of them. But the drawbacks are counter-balanced by +certain advantages. In short, what applies to one country does not +always apply to the other. Yet you propose to treat her exactly as if +she were living in England. That strikes me as somewhat unreasonable." + +"Mr. van Koppen has promised us--" + +"He may do what he likes with his money. But I don't see why I should +become the pivot for making my good friend do what strikes me as a +foolish action. I am too fond of him for that. Mr. van Koppen and +myself have many points in common; among other things this feature, +that neither of us is of aristocratic birth. I suspect this is what +made you count on me for a subscription. You thought that I, having a +little money of my own, might be tempted by certain sycophantic +instincts to emulate his misplaced generosity. But I am not a snob. +From the social point of view I don't care a tuppenny damn for anyone. +On the other hand, my origin has given me something of Dr. Samuel +Johnson's respect for what he calls his betters. I like the upper +classes, especially when they behave according to their old traditions. +That is why I like Miss Wilberforce. She conducts herself, if report be +true, with all the shamelessness of a born lady. Born ladies are not so +common that we should hide them away in nursing homes. All forceful +seclusion is dishonouring. Every little insect, drunk or sober, enjoys +its freedom; and if you gentlemen were not philanthropists I would try +to point out how galling your proposal must be, how humiliating to a +high-spirited woman to be placed under lock and key, in charge of some +callous attendant. But to what purpose? Turkey rhubarb--" + +"I am afraid, Mr. Keith, that we have come at an inopportune moment?" + +"It's quite possible. But I won't keep you much longer--you must be +dying to attend that funeral! In fact, I would not detain you at all if +I did not feel that you expected some kind of explanation from me. What +were we saying?" + +"Turkey rhubarb." + +"Ah, yes! I was trying to be fair-minded which, by the way, is a +general mistake. It struck me that perhaps I over-emphasized its +advantages just now. Because, of course, there is something to be said +against the use of such drugs. In fact, now I come to think of it, +there is a good deal to be said in favour of constipation. It is the +cause of our English spleenfulness, and this spleenfulness, properly +directed, has its uses. It engenders a certain energetic intolerance of +mind. I think the success of our nation is largely due to this +particular quality. If I were an historian I would amuse myself with +proving that we owe not only Magna Charta, but our whole Empire--Canada, +Australia, and all the rest of them--to our costive habits of body. What +befits a nation, however, does not always befit a man. To crush, in a +fit of chronic biliousness, the resistance of Bengal and add its land +to the British Empire, may be a racial virtue. To crush, in a fit of +any kind, the resistance of our next door neighbour Mr. Robinson, and +add his purse to our own, is an individual vice. No! I fail to discover +any personal advantage to be gained from excess of bile. The bilious +eye sees intensely, no doubt, but in a distorted and narrow fashion; it +is incapable of a generous outlook. Cloudy, unserene! A closing-up, +instead of a widening-out. The bowels of compassion: what a wonderful +old phrase! They ought to be kept open. I look around me, and see +extraordinarily little goodwill among my fellow-creatures. Here is Miss +Wilberforce. What she yearns for is the milk of human kindness--gentle +words, gentle dealing, from all of us. Instead of that, every one is +ready to cast stones at her. She is treated like a pariah. For my part +I do not pass her by; I am not ashamed to consort with sinners, if such +they be; I would like, if I could, to make her free and happy instead +of imprisoning her in a place of self-reproach. A healthy man is +naturally well disposed, not on principle or from any divine +inspiration but because his bodily organs are performing their proper +functions. His judgment is not warped by the black humours of +indigestion. He perceives that natural laws, however harsh they seem, +are never so harsh as our amateurish attempts to circumvent them. +Modern philanthropy is an attempt of this nature. It is crass +emotionalism. Regarded from the point of view of the race, your +philanthropy is a disguised form of brutality." + +"Mr. Keith!" + +"All sentimentalists are criminals." + +This perverse balderdash was getting on the nerves of the deputation. +It had one good effect, however. They had been afraid, at first, of +wasting Mr. Keith's time; now they began to realize that he was wasting +theirs. + +"Speaking for myself, Mr. Keith, I should say that you are spoiling +your case by over-statement, and that these reflections of yours are +libels upon a class of men and women who devote their time and money, +often their lives, to alleviating the distress of others. However that +may be, they are generalities. We came to you about a practical matter, +and an urgent one. We want to remove a crying scandal from the island. +The habits of Miss Wilberforce, as I think I pointed out, are shocking +to all decent folks. I suppose you won't deny that?" + +"I remember your using those words. They struck me as remarkable +because, for my own part, I have not yet discovered any man, woman, or +child who could shock me. Some persons make a profession of being +scandalized. I am profoundly distrustful of them. It is the prerogative +of vulgarians to be shocked. If I ever felt inclined to blush, it would +not be a the crooked behaviour of men, but at their crooked +intellectual processes. Whenever a so-called scandal comes my way, I +thank God for the opportunity of seeing something new and learning +something to my advantage." + +"There is nothing very new about the scandalous conduct of Miss +Wilberforce, save her unfortunate habit of divesting herself--" + +"Please to note that there is a good deal of loose and exaggerated talk +going on here. But one thing is quite certain. These exhibitions, +supposing they really take place, have never been known to occur until +after midnight--with the lamentable exception of yesterday afternoon, +when it was even darker than midnight. If your decent folks are so +squeamish, what are they doing in the streets at that unearthly hour? I +am asleep them, as they ought to be. This may account for the fact that +I have never seen the lady in a state of alcoholic exhilaration. But if +I had the good luck to stumble upon her, I would certainly not be +shocked." + +"And what, may I ask, would you do?" + +"My feelings towards the spectacle would depend upon the momentary +state of my mind. I might, for example, be in a frolicsome Elizabethan +mood. In that case I would appreciate the humour of the situation. If +only half of what I hear is true, she must be extremely funny at such +moments. I would probably laugh myself into an apoplexy. I wish the +English still possessed a shred of the old sense of humour which +Puritanism, and dyspepsia, and newspaper reading, and tea-drinking have +nearly extinguished. It ought to be revived afresh. Nothing like a good +drunkard for that purpose. As a laughter-provoking device it is cheaper +and more effective than any pantomime yet invented; and none the worse, +surely, for being a little old-fashioned?" + +"I must say, Mr. Keith, I don't think God created anybody to be laughed +at." + +"Maybe he didn't. But a fellow can't help laughing, all the same. On +the other hand, I might be in that interfering humanitarian mood which +is liable to beset even the wisest of us. I would then be tempted to +lead her homeward gently but firmly, simulating intoxication, if I +could bring myself to do it--pretending, you understand, to be in the +same state as herself, if I could manage it with any prospect of +success--in order to make her feel thoroughly at ease. I should not +dream of ruffling her state of mind by a single word f reproach; the +private feelings and self-respect, even of a drunkard, should never be +violated. Again, if I were in my ordinary reflective condition, I +should doubtless stand aside and muse, as I have often mused, upon the +folly of intemperance. Drunkenness--that shameful vice! How many +estimable men and women have succumbed to it; men I have known, women I +have loved and even respected! This makes me think that we ought to be +grateful to have so glaring an example of insobriety before our eyes. +We ought to regard Miss Wilberforce, if your account of her be true, as +a Divine warning. Warnings are not sent for nothing. And you +gentlemen--you propose to hide away this heaven-sent warning in a +sanatorium. That strikes me as flying in the face of Providence." + +"Our project would at least secure her from the risk of being run over +by some vehicle." + +"Pray, why should the dear lady not choose to be run over? Surely she +can please herself? It would be an appropriate ending to a brief and +merry career. It would be more than this. We spoke, just now, of her +example as a deterrent to others. Well, this example, so far as we +spectators are concerned, would lose its point and pungency if she died +as you propose--a half-reclaimed inebriate in some home. She must be run +over, or otherwise violently destroyed, if we are to have the full +benefit of the example. It is only then that we shall be able to say to +ourselves: Ah, we always thought it was risky to drink strong waters, +but NOW WE KNOW." + +"A fatal accident of this kind, quite apart from other considerations, +would involve her relatives in all kinds of trouble with the legal +authorities of this country." + +"I am glad you mentioned the legal aspects of the case; I had nearly +forgotten them. They are most important. In electing to be crushed +under a vehicle she acts on her own initiative. What you propose is +nothing less than a curtailment of her liberty of action. How do you +think the local authorities would envisage such an arbitrary step? I +imagine it may cost you dear to arrogate to yourselves a power which, +in this country at least, is vested in the proper authorities. You may +well find yourselves in collision with the penal code of Italy which +has been framed, and is now administered, by men of uncommonly wide +views--men who reverence personal freedom above gold and rubies. I +should not be surprised if our magistrate in Nepenthe were to take, on +legal grounds, the same view of the case as I hold on purely moral +ones, namely, that your action towards Miss Wilberforce would amount to +an unwarranted persecution. He would regard it, very likely, as the +unjustifiable incarceration of a perfectly harmless individual. Signor +Malipizzo, I may say, has pronounced views as to his duties towards +society." + +This was too much for one of the respectable members of the deputation. +He asked: + +"Are you referring to that blackguard, that pestilential hog, who calls +himself a judge?" + +"Perhaps you do not know him as well as I do. I wish you knew him +better. I wish you knew him as well as I do! He is worth knowing. Let +me tell you something about him--something new and characteristic. Like +many natives, he is scrupulously fair minded and honest. Now I can get +on, at a pinch, even with an upright man. That is because I always try +to discover the good side of my fellow-creatures. But other people +cannot. Accordingly, being an incorruptible magistrate, he is liable to +encounter hostility among a certain disreputable section of the +populace. His conscientious methods expose him to the accusation of +harsh dealing. This has happened more than once. It happened only two +days ago, when he sentenced to prison a batch of Russian lunatics who +were responsible, among other damage, for the death of three innocent +school-children. I commend his action. He erred, if at all, on the side +of leniency; for we really cannot have a pack of raving wolves at large +here. It is different in Russia. You can go mad there--indeed that +country, with its vast plains and trackless forests, seems to have been +especially created for the purpose of running amok. But this island is +really too small; there are so many glass windows and babies +about--don't you think so, gentlemen?" + +"Nepenthe is certainly a small place, Mr. Keith." + +"Note, now, how differently he treats Miss Wilberforce, who not only +never killed three school-children but has never, to the best of my +knowledge, injured a living creature. I am informed on good authority +that, after spending a tumultuous night in gaol, she has already +regained her liberty. And this, if I am not mistaken, is the second or +third occasion at least on which our judge has behaved in a similar +manner towards her. Once more I commend his action. Why has Signor +Malipizzo set the lady free? Because, unlike a modern philanthropist, +he is aware of the wider issues involved; he acts not with the severity +of a fanatic, but with the understanding, the tolerance, the mellow +sympathy of a man of the world. I said that everyone on Nepenthe +treated Miss Wilberforce as a pariah. That was a mistake. I ought to +have allowed for one exception--our admirable judge! It strikes me as +significant that an official who is bound to her by no ties of +blood-relationship or nationality and who enjoys, moreover, a +reputation--however undeserved--for harshness, should be the one person +on Nepenthe to stretch a point in her favour; the one person who +extends to her the hand of friendship, whose heart goes out in sympathy +with her sad case. Significant, and not altogether creditable to us, +her compatriots. Now who, I wonder, is the friend of man, the modern +Prometheus; you who incarcerate her, or this alien lawyer who sets her +free? To be perfectly frank, I find your attitude contrasts +unfavourably with his own. You are the rigorists, the harsh ones. He is +the humanitarian. Yes, gentlemen! In my humble opinion there is not a +shadow of a doubt about it. Signor Malipizzo is the true +philanthropist...." + +The deputation, wending to the market-place rather hurriedly in order +to take their places in the funeral cortege, said to themselves: + +"We ought to have waited." + +Thinking it over as they marched along, the respectable members came to +the conclusion that the others, the Hopkins section, were really to +blame for the discomfiture of the expedition. It was they who had +insisted with specious arguments upon an interview at this unseasonable +hour of the morning; as for themselves, they would gladly have waited +for a more suitable occasion. In undertones, low but venomous, they +commented upon the undue haste of Mr. Hopkins and its probable motives. +Later on they understood everything. Then they called him a thief and a +rogue, loudly--but not to his face. + +Which shows yet again how inadequately causes and effects are +appreciated here on earth. The dubious Mr. Hopkins may well have been +moved by mercenary considerations. But this fact had nothing to do with +the unsatisfactory issue of the affair. In other words, even as the +Saint, in the matter of that volcanic eruption, had previously gotten +the praise for what was not his merit, so now this sinner was blamed +for what was not his fault. Had the sub-committee waited till the crack +of doom, it would have made no difference whatever to the general trend +of Mr. Keith's sententious irrelevancies. + +Perhaps, if they had caught him in a better humour, he might have had +the decency to invite them to luncheon after the funeral. + +Even this was problematical. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXVII + + + + + +The funeral was a roaring success. The display of ecclesiastics and +choristers was unusually fine. Torquemada had seen to that part of the +business. It was his duty henceforward to cherish the bereaved +representative of Nicaragua--a possible convert, at his hand, to the +true faith. The Clubmen, headed by the excellent Mr. Richards, wore +their gravest faces. Furthermore, in view of the lady's quasi-official +position, the authorities of the island were present in full numbers; +the Militia, too, looked superb in their picturesque uniforms. And so +large was the unofficial attendance, so deafening the music, so +brilliant the sunshine, so perfect the general arrangements that even +the deceased, captious as she was, could hardly (under other +circumstances) have avoided expressing her approval of the performance. + +There was an adequate display of fictitious grief among her social +equals. Madame Steynlin, in particular, carried it off--to outward +appearances--with remarkable success. She looked really quite upset, and +her hat, as usual, attracted the attention of all the ladies. Madame +Steynlin's hats were proverbial. She was always appearing in new ones +of the most costly varieties. And never, by any chance, did they accord +with her uncommon and rather ripe style of beauty. Madame Steynlin was +too romantic to dress well. She trimmed her heart, and not her +garments. A tidy little income, however, enabled her to eke out lack of +taste by recklessness of expenditure. This particular hat, it was +observed, must have cost a fortune. And yet it was a perfect fright; it +made her look fifteen years older, to the delight of all the other +women. + +What cared Madame Steynlin about hats? Her distressful appearance was +not feigned; she was truly upset, though not about the death of the +Commissioner's lady. With an effort whose violence nobody but herself +could appreciate she had managed to extricate herself from the +lion--like embraces of Peter the Great--to what purpose? To perform an +odious social duty; to waste a fair morning in simulating grief for the +death of a woman whom she loathed like poison. Nobody would ever +understand what a trial in altruism had been. Nobody, in fact, ever +gave her credit for a grain of self-abnegation. And yet she was always +trying to please people--denying herself this and that. How harshly the +world judged! + +She was also troubled in mind, though in a lesser degree, about the +fate of the remainder of the Russian colony. Were they not all her +brothers and sisters--these laughing, round-cheeked primitives? The +magistrate, that caricature of a man, that vindictive and corrupt +atheist, that tiger in human form, was doubtless thirsting for the +blood of those still at liberty on Nepenthe. How much longer would +Peter escape his malice? The dear boy! Her lambkin, her little soul--she +had learnt to babble a few words of Russian--her play for, harmless, +ever-hungry Peter! On this lovely island, where all men should be at +peace--how harshly they dealt with one another! + +The rest of the foreign colony, undisturbed by such bitter personal +reflections, appeared to bear the loss of the lady with praiseworthy +equanimity. They were, in truth, considerably relieved in mind. Death +is the great equalizer. In his pale presence they forgot their old +squabbles and jealousies; they forgot their numberless and legitimate +complaints against this woman. All honoured the defunct who had now +lost, presumably for ever, the capacity of mischief-making. + +There was undisguised sorrow among the trades-people and Residency +servants. They flocked to the procession in crowds, desiring by this +last mark of respect to attract the benevolent notice of the +Commissioner and to be remembered in the event of some future +settling-up of accounts. To their tear-stained eyes, it looked as if +this happy event were receding further and further away into the dim +distance. Hoping against hope, they mourned sincerely. And none wept +more convincingly that the little maid Enrichetta, an orphan of tender +years whom the lady had taken into her service as an act of charity and +forthwith set to work like a galley-slave. The child was convulsed with +sobs. She foresaw, with the intuition of despair, that instead of being +paid her miserable wages for the last five months she would have to +content herself with a couple of her deceased mistress's skirts, +thirty-eight inches too wide round the waist. + +There were wreaths--abundance of wreaths. Noticeable among them was an +enormous floral tribute from the owner of the FLUTTERBY. It attracted +the most favourable comment. People said that nobody but a +multi-multi-multi-millionaire could afford to forgive an affront like +that affair of the CREPE DE CHINE. As a matter of fact, old Koppen +would have been the last person on earth to forgive an injury of this +particular kind. He was a good American; he never permitted loose talk +about women, least of all if they were in any way connected with +himself; he would get purple in the face, he would ramp and rage and +hop about like a veritable Sioux, in the face of any suggestion of +improprieties on board his yacht. No, Cornelius van Koppen had acted in +all innocence, from natural kindliness of heart. The legend had never +reached his hears, nobody (for a wonder) having dared to mention it to +him. + +Another wreath, from Count Caloveglia--an uncommonly pretty one, with a +simple but heartfelt inscription--created legitimate surprise. Those +white camellias, people reckoned, could not have cost less than twenty +francs, and everybody knew that the dear old boy was as poor as a +church mouse and that, moreover, he had enjoyed nothing but a bowing +acquaintance with the deceased lady. He had indeed only spoken to her +once in his life. But her face--her face had left an indelible +impression on his sensitive and artistic mind. + +There was something Greek about Count Caloveglia. His pedigree, +uncontaminated by Moor or Spaniard, went back to hoariest antiquity. +Many people said he was a reincarnation of old Hellas. Elbowing his way +through crowded cities or chatting with sunburnt peasant-lads among the +vineyards, he received thrills of pleasurable inspiration--thrills to +which grosser natures are inaccessible. He loved to watch the bodily +movements of his fellow-creatures and all the eloquent gestures of +Southern life--the lingering smile, the sullen stare of anger, the firm +or flaccid step. Within this world of humdrum happenings he created a +world of his own, a sculptor's paradise. Colour said little to him. He +was enamoured of form, the lively passion of the flesh, the tremulous +play of nerve and muscle. A connoisseur of pose and expression, he +looked at mankind from the plastic point of view, peering through +accidentals into what was spiritual, pre-ordained, inevitable; striving +to interpret--to waylay and hold fast--that divinity, fair or foul, which +resides within one and all of us. How would this one look, divested of +ephemeral appurtenances and standing there, in bronze or marble; what +were the essential qualities of those features--their aesthetic mission +to men like himself; to what type or relic of the classic age might +they be assimilated? He was for ever disentangling the eternal from +mundane accessories. And there was an element of the eternal, he used +to declare, in every creature of earth. + +His was an enviable life. He dwelt among masterpieces. They were his +beacons, his comrades, his realities. As for other things--the social +accidents of time and place, his cares and his poverty--he wore them +lightly; they sat upon his shoulders with easy grace, like his own +threadbare coat. When he walked among men he could not help contriving +imaginary statuary in his head, historical portraits or legendary +groups; the faces and attitudes of those he encountered--each one found +a place in the teeming realm of his creative phantasy, each one +beckoned to him, from afar, as a joyous and necessary revelation. + +An enviable life; and never more enviable than on the occasion when he +was introduced, at some absurd tea-party to the lady known as the +Commissioner's stepsister. The face! It took possession of him. It +haunted his artistic dreamings from the same day onwards. He had always +cherished ambitious designs--none more ambitious than a certain piece of +work conceived in the bold Pergamese manner, a noble cluster of women +to be entitled "The Eumenides." ... Her face! That wonderful face +proclaimed itself the keynote of the group. If he lived a thousand +years he would never behold its like again. What would he not have +given to model the lady, then and there! + +But modeling was out of the question for the present. It must never be +known that he was still capable of such an effort; it might spoil all +his chances for the business in hand. He must continue to pose as +heretofore for a harmless antiquarian, a dreamer. Nobody, save old +Andrea the servant, must know the secret of his life. Yet he was not +without hopes of being able to reveal himself ere long in his true +character of creator. The day was perhaps not far distant when a +pecuniary transaction between himself and his respected American +friend, Mr. van Koppen, would ease the burdensome poverty of his life. +Then--then he would return to the gold projects of his youth; to the +"Eumenides," first of all. Light-hearted with bright expectancy, he saw +the financial deal well-nigh concluded; the cheque might be in his +pocket within a week; and now already he saw himself, in imagination, +donning his faded frock-coat and wending his way down to the Residency +to lay the foundations of his heart's desire. He would broach the +subject with that insinuating Southern graciousness which was part and +parcel of his nature; the lady's vanity could be trusted to do the +rest. He knew of old that no woman, however chaste and winsome, can +resist the temptation of sitting as model to a genuine Count--and such a +handsome old Count, into the bargain. + +And now suddenly she had died--died, it might be, only a few days too +soon. That face, that peerless face, was lost for ever to the world of +art--his ideal snatched away by the relentless hand of fate. He mourned +as only a sculptor can mourn. Thus it came about that something +stronger than himself impelled him to manifest his grief. Despite +Andrea's respectful but insistent remonstrances as to the appalling +outlay, the wreath of camellias was ordered and dispatched. An artist's +tribute.... + +It created both surprise and a most excellent impression. What a +gentleman he was! Always doing the right thing. How splendid of him. So +they reasoned, though the wiser ones added that if he had known the +deceased lady a little better he might have hit upon a more sensible +way of spending his money. + +The fact that there was a good deal of social gossip like this, that +appointments for picnics and other functions were being made, would go +alone to prove the advantages of a funeral of this kind, quite apart +from the universal relief experienced when the coffin was lowered into +the earth, and bystanders realized that the lady was at last definitely +transferred into Abraham's bosom. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXXIV + + + + + +All Nepenthe had stood by the side of the grave--all, save only Mr. +Keith. He remained at home. And this was rather odd, for it is the +right thing to attend people's funerals, and Mr. Keith prided himself +upon always doing the right thing. It was his boast to pass for a +typical Anglo-Saxon, the finest race on earth, when all is said and +done; and he used to point out that you could not be a typical +Anglo-Saxon unless you respected yourself, and you could not respect +yourself unless you respected simultaneously your neighbours and their +habits, however perverse they might sometimes appear. Now a funeral, +being unavoidable, cannot by an prestidigitations of logic be called +perverse. All the more reason for being present. But for a strange +twist or kink in his nature, therefore, he would have been on the spot. +He would have turned up in the market-place to the minute, since he +prided himself likewise upon his love of punctuality, declaring that it +was one of the many virtues he possessed in common with Her Majesty +Queen Victoria. + +He disliked funerals. For all his open mind and open bowels, Mr. Keith +displayed an unreasoning hatred of death and, what was still more +remarkable, not the least shame in confessing it. + +"The next interment I purpose to attend," he would say, "will be my +own. May if be far off! No; I don't care about funerals and the +suggestion they convey. A cowardly attitude? I think not. The coward +refuses to face a fact. Death is a fact. I have often faced him. He is +not a pretty fellow. Most men only give him a shy glance out of a +corner of their eye. It scares them out of their wits and makes them +say all sorts of snobbishly respectful things about him. Sheer +flummery! It is with Death as it is with God--we call them good because +we are afraid of what they can do to us. That accounts for our +politeness. Death, universal and inevitable, is none the less a +villainous institution. Every other antagonist can be ignored or bribed +or circumvented or crushed outright. But here is a damnable spectre who +knocks at the door and does not wait to hear you say, 'Come in.' +Hateful! If other people think differently it is because they live +differently. How do they live? Like a cow that has stumbled into a dark +hole, and now spends its time wondering how it managed to get such a +sore behind. Such persons may well be gladdened by the approach of +death. It is the best thing they can do--to depart from world which they +call a dark hole, a world which was obviously not made for them, seeing +that they are always feeling uncomfortable about one thing or another. +Good riddance to them and their moral stomach-aches." + +Mr. Keith professed never to feel uncomfortable. Oh, no! He had no +moral stomach-aches. Unlike other folks, he "reacted to external +stimuli in appropriate fashion," he cultivated the "function of the +real," he always knew how to "dominate his reflexes." His neural +currents were "duly co-ordinated." Mr. Keith was in love with life. It +dealt fairly with him. It made him loth to bid farewell to this +gracious earth and the blue sky overhead, to his cooks and his books, +his gardeners and roses and flaming cannas; loth to exchange these +things of love, these tangible delights, for a hideous and everlasting +annihilation. + +That was why, having got rid of the committee of exasperating buffoons, +he was now prolonging breakfast far beyond the usual hour. The meal was +over at last; and still he felt disinclined to move. Those people had +disquieted his composure with their mephitic rant about philanthropy; +they had almost succeeded in spoiling his morning. And now this +funeral! Would he go into the house and do some reading or write a few +letters? No. He could not write letters just them. He was not feeling +sufficiently Rabelaisian. Epicurus was his God for the moment. In a +mood of heathen wistfulness he lit a cigar and leaned back in the chair +trying to recapture his serenity. + +It was his favourite corner of the domain--a kind of projecting spur or +platform shaded by a few grandiose umbrella pines. Near at hand, on a +slightly lower level, rose a group of flame--like cypresses whose +shapely outlines stood out against the sea, shining far below like a +lake of pearl. The milky sheen of morning, soon to be dispelled by the +breeze, still hung about the water and distant continent--it trembled +upon the horizon in bands of translucent opal. His eye roved round the +undulating garden, full of sunlight and flowers and buzzing insects. +From a verbena hard by came the liquid song of a blackcap. It gave him +pleasure; he encouraged the blackcaps, delighting in their music and +because they destroyed the spiders whose troublesome webs were apt to +come in contact with his spectacles. The gardeners had severest +instructions not to approach their nests. It was one of the minor +griefs of his life that, being so short-sighted, he could never +discover a bird's nest; no, not even as a child. Memories of boyhood +began to flit through his mind; they curled upwards in the scented +wreaths of his Havana.... + +The golden oriole's flute-like whistle poured down from some leafy +summit in a sudden stream of melody. A hurried note, he thought; +expressed without much feeling--from duty rather than inclination; not +like the full-throated ease of other orioles in other lands he knew. +And so were the nightingales. They profited by his hospitality for a +day or two and then, uttering a perfunctory little tune, some +breathless and insincere word of thanks--just like any human +visitor--betook themselves elsewhere, northwards. + +Northwards! + +He glanced into the mazy foliage of the pine tree overhead, out of +which a shower of aromatic fragrance was descending to mingle with the +harsher perfume of the cypress. How they changed their faces, the +conifers--so fervent and friendly at this hour, so forbidding at +nighttime! Rifts of blue sky now gleamed through its network of +branches; drenched in the sunny rays, the tree seemed to shudder and +crackle with warmth. He listened. There was silence among those +coralline articulations. Soon it would be broken. Soon the cicada would +strike up its note in the labyrinth of needles--annual signal for his +own departure from Nepenthe. He always waited for the first cicada. + +Northwards! + +To his little place in the Highlands, at first. The meager soil and +parsimonious culture, the reasonable discourse of the people, their +wholesome disputatiousness, acted as a kind of purge or tonic after all +this Southern exuberance. Scotland chastened him; its rocks and tawny +glinting waters and bleak purple uplands rectified his perspective. He +called to mind the sensuous melancholy of the birches, the foxgloves, +the hedgerows smothered in dog-roses; he remembered the nights, full of +fairy-like suggestion and odours of earth and budding leaves--those +wonderful nights with their silvery radiance, calm and benignant, +streaming upwards form the luminous North. + +Then, after strolling aimlessly elsewhere, on sea or land, visiting +friends--no matter whom or where--he would return to Nepenthe to indulge +his genius to the full in the vintage bacchanals. He owned a small +plantation that lay high up, among the easterly cliffs of the island. +It produced that mountain wine which was held to be the best on +Nepenthe. The vines grew upon a natural platform, surrounded by rugged +lava crags that overhung the sea. + +Hither he was wont to repair with certain of his domestic staff and +three or four friends from out of his "inner circle," to superintend +the pressing of the grapes. There was a rude structure of masonry on +the spot--a vaulted chamber containing winepress and vats and hoes and +other implements of the husbandman's time-honoured craft; a few chairs +and a table completed the furniture. Nobody knew exactly what happened +up here. People talked of wild and shameless carousals; the rocks were +said to resound with ribald laughter while Mr. Keith, oozing paganism +at every pore, danced faun-like measures to the sound of rustic flutes. +Certain it was that the party often got riotously tipsy. + +So tipsy that sometimes their host was unable to be moved down to his +villa. On such days he was put to bed on the floor between two wine +barrels, and the chef hastily advised to come up with some food and a +portable kitchen range. In earliest morning he would insist upon +tottering forth to watch the sun as it rose behind the peaks of the +distant mainland, flooding the sea with golden radiance and causing the +precipices to glitter like burnished bronze. He loved the sunrise--he +saw it so seldom. Then breakfast; a rather simple breakfast by way of a +change. It was on one of these occasions that the chef made a mistake +which his master was slow to forgive. He prepared for that critical +meal a dish of poached eggs, the sight of which threw Mr. Keith into an +incomprehensible fit of rage. + +"Take those damned things away, quickly!" he commanded. It was the +celebrated artist's one and only LACHE. + +As a rule, however, he did not sleep on the spot. Peasants, climbing to +their work on the hillsides in the twilit hour of dawn, were wont to +encounter that staggering procession headed by Mr. Keith who, with +spectacles all awry and crooning softly to himself, was carried round +the more perilous turnings by a contingent of his devoted retainers. + +He found it pleasant to live like this. And now another spring was +nearing to its end. For how many more years, he wondered.... That +confounded funeral.... + +There was a rustle at his back. The southerly breeze had struck +Nepenthe on its morning ripple over the Tyrrhenian, setting things +astir; it searched a passage through those mighty canes which sprouted +in a dank hollow where the rains of winter commingled their waters. The +leaves grew vocal with a sound like the splash of a rivulet. Often had +he listened joyfully to that melody which compensated, to some small +degree, for the lack of the old Duke's twenty-four fountains. Legendary +music! Now it made him sad. What was its burden? MIDAS HAD ASSES' EARS. +Midas, the fabled king, whose touch turned everything to gold. And +gold, and jewels--of what avail were these against the spectre? + +The gardeners, moving with bare feet among the sinuous paths, were +quick to perceive that a cloud had fallen upon his spirit. They divined +his moods with the tactfulness of natural sympathy. On some +horticultural pretext one of them drew near and craftily engaged his +thoughts and conversation. At last he said something that made him +smile. One or two more appeared upon the scene, as if by accident. It +was evident that the master needed cheering up. They began to tell him +the fairy-tales he loved; tales of robbers and witches and +pirates--grand old tales that never wearied him. To arouse his interest +they joked among themselves, as though unaware of his existence. One of +them, and then another, sang some wild song of love and war which he +had picked up while wandering with his flocks among the craggy hills of +yonder mainland. He was laughing now; outdoing their songs and stories. +It kept him young--to unbend, to play the fool in company such as theirs +and relax the fibres stiffened by conventionality; it refreshed him to +exchange the ephemeral for the eternal, the tomfoolery of social life +for Theocritus and his deathless creatures. How fair it was, this +smiling earth! How blithely the young voices went aloft! + +They failed to drown those other strains, vagrant wraiths that now +floated upwards over fields and houses on the tepid wings of the +sirocco--fragmentary snatches, torn from the brazen measure of the +municipal band as it marched with the funeral procession. He cursed the +sounds from the bottom of his heart. They reminded him of that infamous +apparition, of all he most ardently desired to forget. His laughter +died down. Wanly he looked at his mirthful pagans, the embodiment of +joys. Yes; these were his distractions, his playmates, his elixir of +life, his antidote against the only disease, the only sin, crime, vice +which he recognized on earth--a vice none the less, because it happened +to be the inevitable--the vice of old age. And all the time that pallid +swarm came crowding on: messengers from the inexorable spectre. He felt +them creeping about with ghostly tread, blighting the radiance of his +life, tainting the very air he breathed. Hateful intruders! They wailed +among his lilies. The garden was full of their horrid footsteps. + +In their presence Mr. Keith began to experience an uncomfortable +sensation, a kind of chill--as though something evil had stepped between +himself and the brave light of the sun. It was a fleeting feeling which +he would have diagnosed, in other people, as perilously akin to a moral +stomach-ache. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXIX + + + + + +Only one other person on Nepenthe found cause to complain of the +municipal music. It was Mr. Heard. Altogether, he was not greatly +edified by this, the first funeral of its kind he had ever witnessed. A +rowdy-dowdy business, he called it. The music was too lively and +blatant for so solemn an occasion; the gorgeous vestments of the +clergy, the loud chattering among the mourners, the violent gestures +that accompanied Torquemada's well-meant and carefully prepared oration +(Don Francesco, a born speaker, would have done it better, but the +defunct was no friend or even client of his)--all these things savoured +slightly of irreverence. Everyone was talking and laughing as they +marched along. It was more like a polonaise than a funeral. In his +African period the sight of such a burial would have affected him +unpleasantly. But Mr. Heard was changing, widening out. + +"These people live gaily," he said to himself. "Why not? A funeral is +supposed to be nothing but a friendly leave-taking. Why not be cheerful +about it? We are all going to see each other again, sometime, +somewhere. I suppose...." + +The problem gave him no trouble whatever. + +He found himself walking side by side with Mr. Eames who ventured to +remark, in a seemly whisper, that he attended the funeral not so much +out of respect for the lamented lady--every cloud, he fancied, had a +silver lining--as because he hoped to gather, from among so +representative a concourse of natives and foreigners, the "popular +impression" of yesterday's eruption, with a view to utilizing it in +this appendix on RECENT VOLCANIC PHENOMENA OF NEPENTHE. + +"Really?" replied the bishop. "A chapter on Volcanic Phenomena? It is +sure to be interesting." + +Mr. Eames warmed to his subject. + +It might be made interesting, he agreed, but for his own ignorance of +geology. As it was the business gave him a vast deal of trouble. +Monsignor Perrelli had dealt with geological matters in a fashion far +too summary for present-day requirements. The old scholar was not to +blame, of course, seeing that geology was quite a modern science; but +he might at least have been a little more painstaking in his record of +those showers of ashes and lapilli which were known to have covered the +island from time to time. His account of them was lamentably defective. +It was literally bristling with--with--with lacunae, which had to be +filled up by means of laborious references to contemporary chronicles. +Altogether one of the most unsatisfactory sections of an otherwise +admirable work.... + +"I wish I could help you," said Mr. Heard. + +"I wish you could. I wish anyone could. There was that young Jew, +Marten, who understood more about these things than most people. A +coarse little fellow, but quite a specialist. He promised to supply me +with an up-to-date statement, accompanied by a map of the geological +structure of the island. I said to myself: Just what I wanted! Well, +this confounded statement has never reached my hands. Now I fear he has +left the place. Gone away altogether. Didn't have the decency to say +good-bye or leave his address. Too bad. Who knows when the next +mineralogist will turn up? These fellows are not as common as +blackbirds. Meanwhile I have to rely on my own efforts. It's wonderful, +by the way, how much a person can pick up of odds and ends of +information when forced, by a hobby of this kind, to delve into +recondite departments of knowledge which he would otherwise not have +dreamt of exploring. One grows quite encyclopaedic! Minerals, medicine, +strategy, heraldry, navigation, palaeography, statistics, politics, +botany--what did I know or care about all these things before I stumbled +on old Perrelli? Have you ever tried to annotate a classic, Mr. Heard? +I assure you it opens up new vistas, new realms of delight. It gives +one a genuine zest in life. Enthralling!" + +And thereupon the bibliographer fell silent, all at once. He had +succumbed, yet again, to his besetting sin: talking too +enthusiastically to outsiders of what was nearest his heart. Why on +earth should a globe-trotting bishop be bothered about the mineralogy +of Nepenthe? It was absurd: tactless of him. + +He tried to atone for the blunder by some mundane trivialities. + +"What are you doing afterwards?" + +"Going up to see Mrs. Meadows." + +"Are you? Do remember me very kindly! Or perhaps--no. Better not. Fact +is, she cut me dead two days ago. At least, it looked uncommonly like +it. I confess I was rather upset, because I'm not conscious of having +done anything to annoy her. Indeed, I've always felt a kind of weakness +for Mrs. Meadows; there is something so fine and womanly about her. +Will you try to find out what it's all about? Thanks. Perhaps she may +not have noticed me. She was walking very fast. And I must say she was +not looking herself at all. Not at all. White and scared. Looked as if +she had seen a ghost." + +The bishop was troubled by these words. + +"Is that so?" he asked. "You alarm me. I think I'll be off this minute. +She is my cousin, you know; and I've been rather concerned about her +lately. Yes; I won't wait for the end of this funeral; I'll be off! +Perhaps we shall meet this evening. Then I can tell you her news. As to +deliberately cutting you--don't you believe that for a minute." + +"I shall be down here about seven o'clock...." + +"People like her," thought Mr. Heard, as he fell out of the procession. +He would make a point of having a good long chat, and perhaps stay to +luncheon. + +He dreaded the coming heat of midday. It was quite warm enough already, +as he climbed slowly upward by the short cuts that intersected the +driving road, availing himself of every little patch of shade that fell +from trees or cottages athwart the pathway. + +The country seemed deserted, the funeral ceremony having attracted all +the natives from far and near. Yet one figure was moving rapidly up the +road in front of him. Muhlen! Even at this distance he was +recognizable; he looked, as usual, overdressed. What was he doing +there, at this hour? Mr. Heard remembered seeing him go up, once +before, at the same time of the day. + +He called to mind what he had heard from Keith in the boat. He was +quite prepared to believe that this man lived on blackmail and women; +that was precisely what he looked like. A villainous personality, +masquerading under an assumed name. The sight of the fellow annoyed +him. What business had he to transact up there? Retlow! Once more he +began to puzzle where he had heard that name. It conjured up, dimly, +some unpleasant connotation. Where? Long ago; so much was clear. For a +brief moment he felt on the verge of remembering. Then his mind became +blank as before; the revelation had slipped away, past recall. + +He was glad to enter the shady garden of the villa Mon Repos. Old +Caterina sat, sphinx-like, on the stones at the house entrance. There +was some knitting-work on her lap, with brown wool and curiously shaped +needles; one foot rested on the base of the cradle, which she rocked +from time to time. At his approach she rose up, stark and hieratic, +without a trace of a friendly smile on her countenance. Was the lady +indoors? No, she was out. Out! Where? There was a definite but +enigmatical movement of her withered brown arm; it appeared to embrace +the universe. And when would she be back? No reply whatever. Only a +slight upward movement of the eyes, as much as to say: God knows! + +"I'll wait," thought Mr. Heard. + +He walked past the forbidding hag who seemed to exhale a positive +hostility towards him, and entered his cousin's sitting-room. He would +wait. He waited. He glanced through a pile of illustrated newspapers +that lay about. And still he waited. The room looked different somehow; +almost untidy. There were no rouses about. An hour passed. And still no +sign of his cousin. + +Out. Always out. What could this mean? Where could she be? It was all +rather mysterious and unsatisfactory. + +At last he took out his watch. Ten minutes to one! No use waiting any +longer. He scribbled a hasty note, left it on the writing-table, and +walked into the garden past the impenetrable Caterina, who barely +deigned to glance up from her knitting. He would look for a carriage, +and give himself the luxury of a drive down. It was too hot to walk at +that hour. + +Strolling along he espied a familiar courtyard that gave upon the +street; Count Caloveglia's place. On an impulse he entered the massive +portal which stood invitingly ajar. Two elderly gentlemen sat +discoursing in the shade of the fig tree; there was no difficulty in +recognizing the stranger as Mr. van Koppen, the American millionaire, a +frequent visitor, they said, of Count Caloveglia. + +A bronze statuette, green with age, stood on a pedestal before them. + +"How kind of you to come and see me!" said the Italian. "Pray make +yourself as comfortable as you can, though these chairs, I fear, are +not of the latest design. You are going to do me the honour, are you +not, of sharing my simple luncheon? Mr. van Koppen is staying too." + +"Very good of you!" + +"Delighted to make your acquaintance," said the millionaire. "Keith was +talking about you only yesterday--such nice things! Do stay. Count +Caloveglia has been touching on most interesting subjects--I would come +from the other end of the world to listen to him." + +The Count, manifestly shy of these praises, interrupted by asking: + +"What do you think of that bronze, Mr. Heard?" + +It was an exquisite little thing. + +Perfect to the finger-tips and glowing in a lustrous patina of +golden-green, the Locri Faun--so-called from the place of its +discovery--was declared to be stamped with the hall-mark of individual +distinction which the artificers of old Hellas contrived to impress +upon every one of the rare surviving bronzes of its period. It was +perhaps the finest of the whole group. No wonder the statue had created +wild excitement among the few, the very few, discreet amateurs who had +been permitted to inspect the relic prior to its clandestine departure +from the country. And much as they might deplore the fact that it was +probably going to adorn the museum of Mr. Cornelius van Koppen, an +alien millionaire, not one of them found it in his heart to disapprove +Count Caloveglia's action. For they all liked him. Every one liked him. +They all understood his position. He was a necessitous widower with a +marriageable daughter on his hands, a girl whom everybody admired for +her beauty and charm of character. + +Mr. van Koppen, like all the rest, knew what hard times he had gone +through; how, born of an ancient and wealthy family, he had not +hesitated to sell his wonderful collection of antiques together with +all but a shred of his ancestral estates, in order to redeem the +gambling debts of a brother. That amounted to quixotism, they declared. +They little realized what anguish of mind this step had cost him, for +he concealed his true feelings under a cloak of playful worldliness. +Excess of grief, he held, is an unlovely thing--not meet to be displayed +before men. All excess is unlovely. That was Count Caloveglia's classic +point of view. Measure! Measure in everything. + +People revered him, above all else, for his knowledge in matters of +art. His connoisseurship was not one of mere learning; it was +intuitional. Astonishing tales were told of him. By the sense of touch +alone, and in the dark, he could appraise correctly any piece of +plastic work you liked. He had a natural affinity with such things. +They held it quite likely that the blood of Praxiteles or his compeers +may still have flowed through his veins--certain at all events, that +there hung about his person the traditions of the versatile colonists +on the shores of Magna Graecia who, freed by legions of slaves from the +trivial vexations which beset modern lives, were able to create in +their golden leisure those monuments of beauty which are the envy and +despair of our generation. On all that concerned the history and +technique of ancient bronzes, more especially, he was FACILE PRINCEPS +in the land, and it was hinted, after the sale of his property, that +Count Caloveglia would not be low to retrieve the fortunes of his +family by putting into exercise those talents for metal-working of +which, as a gifted boy, he had already shown himself to be possessed. + +In this they were disappointed. He spoke of these things as "sins of +his youth," professing an invincible distaste, in these later years, +for the drudgery of work. He called himself an old dreamer. There was a +shed, it is true, attached to the house, a shed which went by the name +of a studio. All visitors were taken to see this atelier. It was +smothered in dust and cobwebs. Clearly, as the Count himself would +explain with a honeyed smile, it had not been in use for twenty years +or more. + +Mr. van Koppen knew all this. + +He knew about that strip of land which the old man had reserved for +himself at the sale of his ancestral domain. It lay among the hills, +some twenty or thirty miles above the classic site of Locri. On this +spot, people were given to understand, fragments of old marbles and +vases had been picked up by the peasantry within the last years. Things +of small worth--pottery mostly; they lay about Count Caloveglia's +Nepenthe courtyard and were given by him, as keepsakes, to any visitor +who showed an interest in them. He attached no value to these trifles. + +"From my little place on the hills," he would say. "Pray take it as a +memento of the pleasure which your visit has given me! Oh, it is quite +a small property, you know; just a few acres, with a meager soil; in +good years it produces a little oil and a barrel or two of wine. And +that is all. I only kept back this morsel from the general ruin of my +property--well, for sentimental reasons. One likes to feel that one is +still tied--by a slender thread, it is true--to the land of one's +ancestors. There is certainly no wealth to be obtained above ground. +But it is quite possible that something might emerge from below, given +the energy and the means to make systematic excavations. The whole +country is so rich in remains of Hellenic life! The countrymen, +ploughing my few fields, often stumble upon some odd trifle of this +kind. There was that Demeter you may have heard about; sadly mutilated, +alas!" + +Before the discovery of the Locri Faun on this site the only find of +any value had been a battered head--a Demeter, presumably. It was sold +to a Paris collection for a few thousand francs, and had thereafter +attracted no further attention. It was not worth talking about. + +Now, when this dazzling Faun came to light and Mr. van Koppen announced +his intention of purchasing the masterpiece for his collection, his +art-expert, Sir Herbert Street--the eminent connoisseur whom he had +filched form the South Kensington Museum with the bribe of a Cabinet +Minister's salary--thought it his duty to compare the disfigured Demeter +with this new and marvelous thing. Sir Herbert Street was an +inordinately vain man, but conscientious at the same time and, in +matters of art-criticism, sufficiently reliable. Not every art-expert +would have done what he did. In the interests of his employer he took +the trouble of journeying to Paris and carefully examining the poor +Demeter fragment. Then, viewing the Locri Faun at Nepenthe in the +presence of Count Caloveglia, he made rather a subtle remark. + +"Does it not strike you, Count, that there is a curious, an evasive +kind of resemblance between this Faun and the Demeter?" + +The old man beamed with joy at these words. + +"My dear Sir Herbert, allow me to congratulate you on your keen +artistic perception! I believe you are the only person, besides myself, +who has hitherto been struck by those definite but undefinable traits +of similarity. Mr. van Koppen may well be proud of your penetration--" + +"Thank you," said the other, immensely flattered. "That is what I am +paid for, you know. But now, how do you account for the likeness?" + +"I will tell you my own hypothesis. I hold, to be brief, that they both +came from the same workshop." + +"The same workshop! You amaze me." + +"Yes, or at all events from the same school of craftsmen, or some +common fountain of inspiration. We know lamentably little of the art +history of even a great center like Locri, but, judging by the hints of +Pindar and Demosthenes, I think there may well have been--there must +have been--consummate local masters, now forgotten, who propagated +certain methods of work, certain fashions in form and feeling and +treatment which ended, naturally enough, in a kind of fixed tradition. +This would suffice to explain the resemblance which your sagacity has +enabled you to detect between these two pieces. That is what I mean by +saying that they came from the same workshop. What do you think of my +theory?" + +"I think it accounts for the fact in a most satisfactory manner," the +expert had replied, thoroughly convinced. + +Mr. van Koppen knew all this. + +But he only believed half of it.... + +"You were saying, Count?" + +The Italian shifted his glance from the dainty outlines of the Locri +Faun and smiled upon his interlocutor and then upon Mr. Heard, who had +at last taken a seat, after walking approvingly round and round the +statuette. + +"I was going to tell you of another point which occurred later on to +Sir Herbert; a man, by the way, of unusual acumen. We agreed that Locri +was the indubitable place of origin both of the Demeter and of the +Faun. 'Well,' said he, 'granting this--how came they to be unearthed up +in the hills, on your property, twenty-five miles away?' I confess I +was at first nonplussed by this question. For, to the best of my +knowledge, there are no indications of any large Hellenic settlement up +there. But it struck me that there may well have been a villa or +two--indeed, there must have been, to judge by the miscellaneous ancient +material found on my little place. This is what makes me think that +these two relics were deliberately carried there." + +"Carried?" + +"Carried. For although the summer season at Locri was undoubtedly more +endurable then than it now is, yet the town must have been sufficiently +hot in the dog-days; whereas my vineyard is situated among the cool +uplands--" + +"A kind of climatic station, you mean?" + +"Precisely. Don't you think that richer people had domiciles in both +places? The ancients, you know, were so sensitive in the matter of +temperatures that in summer time they traveled only by night and some +of their toughest generals had underground chambers built for them +during their campaigns. I can imagine, for instance, some young and +ardent lover of art, in the days when Pythagoras taught under those +glittering colonnades of Croton, when the fleets of Metapontum swept +the blue Ionian and Sybaris taught the world how to live a life of +ease--I can almost see this youth," he pursued enthusiastically, +"flitting from a hot palace on the plain towards those breezy heights +and, inflamed with an all-absorbing passion for the beautiful, carrying +up with him one or two, just one or two, of those beloved bronzes from +which he could not, and would not, be parted--no, not even for a short +summer month--to be a joy to his eyes and an inspiration to h is soul +among the mountain solitudes. These men, I take it, had a sense in +which we their descendants are wholly deficient--the sense of the +solace, of the pleasurable companionship, to be derived from works of +art. That sense has been destroyed. The Japanese alone, of all moderns, +still foster an ingenuous affection which prompts them to cling closely +to these things of beauty, to press them to their hearts as loving +friends; the rest of us, surrounded by a world of sordid ugliness, have +become positively afraid of their fair but reproachful shapes. Ah, Mr. +van Koppen, that was the age of true refinement, the age of gold! +Nowadays--nowadays we only carry our troubles about with us." + +The bishop was touched by these moving words. + +Mr. van Koppen, wearing a benevolent twinkle in his eye, said to +himself: + +"What a lordly liar! Almost as good as myself." + +Luncheon was announced. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXX + + + + + +"You are quite right," the Count was saying to Mr. Heard. "The ideal +cuisine should display an individual character; it should offer a menu +judiciously chosen from the kitchen-workshops of the most diverse lands +and peoples-a menu reflecting the master's alert and fastidious taste. +Is there anything better, for instance, than a genuine Turkish pilaf? +The Poles and Spaniards, too, have some notable culinary creations. And +if I were able to carry out my ideas on this point I would certainly +add to my list of dishes a few of those strange Oriental confections +which Mr. Keith has successfully taught his Italian chef. There is +suggestion about them; they conjure up visions of that rich and glowing +East which I would give many years of my remaining life to see." + +"Then why not do what I have proposed several times already?" queried +the millionaire. "I am in the East every winter; we reckon this year to +reach Bangkok the first fortnight in November. We can find room for you +on board. We'll make room! Your company would give me more pleasure +than I can say." + +Count Caloveglia was probably the only male person on earth to whom the +owner of the FLUTTERBY would have extended such an invitation. + +"My dear friend!" replied the other. "I shall never be able to repay +your kindness, as it is. Alas, it cannot be done, not now. And don't +you think," he went on, reverting to his theme, "that we might revive a +few of those forgotten recipes of the past? Not their over-spiced +entremets, I mean--their gross joints and pasties, their swans and +peacocks--but those which deal, for example, with the preparation of +fresh-water fishes? A pike, to my way of thinking, is a coarse, +mud-born creature. But if you will take the trouble, as I once did, to +dress a pike according to the complicated instructions of some obsolete +cookery-book, you will find him sufficiently palatable, by way of a +change." + +"You would make an excellent chef!" + +"It is plain," added Mr. Heard, "that the Count does not disdain to +practise his skill upon the most ancient and honourable of domestic +arts." + +"Indeed I don't. I would cook CON AMORE if I had leisure and materials. +All culinary tasks should be performed with reverential love, don't you +think so? To say that a cook must possess the requisite outfit of +culinary skill and temperament--that is hardly more than saying that a +soldier must appear in uniform. You can have a bad soldier in uniform. +The true cook must have not only those externals, but a large dose of +general worldly experience. He is the perfect blend, the only perfect +blend, of artist and philosopher. He knows his worth: he holds in his +palm the happiness of mankind, the welfare of generations yet unborn. +That is why you will never obtain adequate human nourishment from a +young girl or boy. Such persons may do for housework, but not in the +kitchen. Never in the kitchen! No one can aspire to be a philosopher +who is in an incomplete state of physical development. The true cook +must be mature; she must know the world form her social point of view, +however humble it be; she must have pondered concerning good and evil, +in however lowly and incongruous a fashion; she must have passed +through the crucible of sin and suffering or, at the very least--it is +often the same thing--of married life. Best of all, she should have a +lover, a fierce and brutal lover who beats and caresses her in turns; +for every woman worthy of the name is subject and entitled to +fluctuating psychic needs--needs which must be satisfied to the very +core, if the master is to enjoy sound, healthy fare." + +"We don't always allow them to fulfil that last condition," observed +Mr. Heard. + +"I know we don't. That is precisely why we are so often poisoned or +starved, instead of being cheered with wholesome food." + +"You were speaking of woman-cooks?" asked van Koppen. + +"I was. But it stands to reason that no woman can be trusted with so +responsible a task--so sacred a mission, I ought to call it--in regions +south of Bordeaux or east of Vienna. Among many other reasons the whole +sex is too drowsy, outside that radius. And if she drinks a little--" + +"Drinks a little?" + +"If she drinks a little, why it is all to the good. It shows that she +is fully equipped on the other side of her dual nature. It proves that +she possesses the prime requisite of the artist; sensitiveness and a +capacity for enthusiasm. Indeed, I often doubt whether you will ever +derive well-flavoured victuals from the atelier of an individual who +honestly despises or fears--it is the same thing--the choicest gift of +God. Andrea, my man here, is abstemious to the last degree; not, I am +glad to say, from conviction or ill-health--it is the same thing--but +because he is incurably desirous of saving my money. What is the +consequence? You can taste his self-imposed asceticism in the very +ZABBAGLIONE, for which I must really apologize! It speaks to the eye, +but not to the heart. Let us hope the coffee will be more harmonious." + +"Would you not include some of our American dishes in your bill of +fare?" + +"To be sure I would; a fine selection. I have most pleasant +recollections of the cuisine of Baltimore." + +"You can get all those things in New York." + +"No doubt; no doubt. But one thing invariably distresses me in +transatlantic dinners: the unseemly haste in rising. One might really +think the company were ashamed of so natural and jovial a function as +that to which a dining-room is consecrated. And then, have you not +noticed that, sitting at table, a certain intellectual tone, an +atmosphere of a definite kind, is insensibly generated among the +guests, whatever the subject of conversation may be? They are often +quite unaware of its existence, but it hangs none the less about the +room and binds the inmates together for the time being. Suddenly we are +bidden to rise and betake ourselves elsewhere; to sit on other chairs +in a different temperature among different surroundings. It is a +wrench. That peculiar atmosphere is dissipated; the genius of the +earlier moment driven out beyond recapture; we must adapt ourselves to +other conditions and begin anew, often with a good deal of +trouble--often, how often, against our inclination! I call that a +perverse custom. Every state of the mind, whether we are in society or +alone, should be pressed to the last drop, irrespective of whether we +happen to have swallowed a final mouthful of food or not. When the +conversation has died, as everything must die, from sheer inability to +draw further breaths of life, then is the time to break up that old +encircling dome of thought; to construct a fresh one, if need be, in a +fresh environment." + +"I confess," said the American, "it has always struck me as rather +barbarous--this running away. I like to linger. But the ladies don't. +They know that their dresses show off better in a parlour than under a +boards of a mahogany table; perhaps their conversation, too, sounds +better among arm-chairs and rugs. So we run after then, as we generally +do; instead of making them run after us" ("as I do," he added to +himself). "But, Count! If you like our American dishes, why not get +this man of yours to learn a few from the Duchess? I know she would +gladly teach him; she is not jealous of her knowledge like a +professional chef." + +"I would have asked her that favour long ago, if Andrea had been a born +cook, like Keith's men. Unfortunately he is quite different. The +philosopher is represented in his nature, but not the artist. He is +only a devoted Arcadian, overflowing with good intentions." + +"And are they of no avail?" queried the bishop. + +"I have been told that, in art and literature, they will atone for +deficiency of natural talent. It may be so; some persons, at least, +have been able to cajole their brains into believing this. However that +may be, I do not think the rule can be extended into the domain of +cookery. Good intentions--no. Nobody need attempt such an imposture on +his stomach, an upright and uncompromising organ, which refuses to +listen to nonsense. Or let them try the experiment. Gastritis will be +the result of good intentions...." + +Mr. Heard stretched out his legs. He was beginning to feel at ease. He +like this comely old man; he detected an abiding quality in his outlook +and person. And he felt at home in these surroundings. There was an air +of simplicity and refinement in that calm ground-floor chamber, with +its subdued light filtering through windows that opened upon the +courtyard, groined vaulting of noble proportions, stucco frieze stained +with age to an ivory hue, and those other decorations which the Count, +loyal to the traditions of old-world peasant architecture, had piously +left unaltered--or, it may be, adapted to modern needs by touches so +deft as not to reveal his own consummate artistry. Through the open +door by which they had entered came breathings of warm wind laden with +the suave odour of a tuft of Madonna lilies that grew, half neglected, +in a shady corner. He had noticed them on his entry--how they stood in +proud clusters, bending forward with mighty effort to reach the light. + +His eye strayed into the courtyard and moved about the green penumbra +created by the fig tree's massy foliage; it glanced over fragments of +statuary half buried under a riot of leaves and nodding flowers, and +rested with complaisance upon the brickwork flooring of herring-bone +pattern, coloured in a warm, velvety Indian-red. It was worn down here +and there by tread of feet, and pleasantly marked with patches of +emerald-green moss and amber-tinted streaks of light that played about +its surface wherever the sunbeams could pierce the dense leafage +overhead. + +From where he sat he could see the Locri Faun on its pedestal. The +figure was drowned in twilight. It seemed to slumber. + +Meanwhile Andrea, looking uncommonly ceremonious in white tie and white +cotton globes, was handing round the coffee. It was pronounced an +unqualified success. "Absolutely harmonious," declared the bishop, who +had no hesitation, after a critical sip or two, in extending his +approval to a curiously flavoured liqueur of unknown ingredients. + +"From my little property on the mainland," the Count explained. "If it +were a clear day I would take you up to my roof and show you the very +site, although it is leagues and leagues away. But the south wind +always casts a haze over the mainland at this time of day--a kind of +veil." + +Mr. van Koppen, connoisseur of cigars, opened his capacious case and +offered its contents, without disclosing the fact that they were +specially manufactured for him at a fabulous price. + +"You will find them smokable, I hope. As a matter of fact it's no use +trying to keep a cigar in good condition on the yacht. And it must be +the same on an island like this. So far as tobacco is concerned, +Nepenthe can be nothing but a ship at anchor." + +"True," said the Count. "The moist sirocco is injurious to the finer +growths." + +"This south wind!" exclaimed Mr. Heard. "This African pest! Is there no +other wind hereabouts? Tell me, Count, does the sirocco always blow?" + +"So far as I have observed it blows constantly during the spring and +summer. Hardly less constantly in autumn," he added. "And in winter, +often for weeks on end." + +"Sounds promising," observed the bishop. "And has it no influence on +the character?" + +"The native is accustomed, or resigned. Foreigners, sometimes, are +tempted to strange actions under its influence." + +The American said: + +"You spoke of amalgamating our cuisine with yours, or vice versa. It +can doubtless be done, to the profit of both parties. Why not go a step +further? Why not amalgamate our respective civilizations?" + +"A pleasant dream, my friend, with which I have occasionally beguiled +myself! Our contribution to human happiness, and that of America--are +they not irreconcilable? What is yours? Comfort, time and labour saving +contrivances; abundance; in a word, all that is summed up under the +denomination of utility. Ours, let us say, is beauty. No doubt we could +saturate ourselves with each other's ideals, to our mutual advantage. +But it would never be an amalgam; the joints would show. It would be a +successful graft, rather than a fusion of elements. No; I do not see +how beauty and utility are ever to be syncretized into a homogeneous +conception. They are too antagonistic to coalesce." + +"But there is abundant beauty and grandeur in modern American life," +said the millionaire, "quite apart, I mean, from that of the natural +scenery. A fine steam-engine, for instance--I call that a beautiful +thing, perfectly adapted to its end. Is its beauty really so +antagonistic to that of your civilization?" + +"I know that some excellent persons have been writing lately about the +beauty of a swift-gliding motor-car and things of that kind. They are +right, in one sense of the word. For there is a beauty to mechanical +fitness which no art can enhance. But it is not the beauty of which I +spoke." + +"And therefore," observed the bishop, "we ought to have another word +for it." + +"Precisely, my dear sir! We ought to have another word. All values are +continually being revised, and tested anew. Are they not? We have been +restating moral values within the last half-century; it is the same +with artistic ones. New canons of taste, new standards, are continually +being evolved; there is a general widening and multiplying of notions. +This, I think, ought to make us careful as to the words we employ, and +ready to coin new ones whenever a new idea is to be expressed. If we +enlarge our concepts, we should likewise enlarge our vocabulary. When I +spoke of beauty, I used the word in its narrow classical meaning, a +meaning which may be out of fashion, but which has the great advantage +that it happens to be irrevocably fixed and defined for us by what the +ancients themselves have handed down in the way of art and criticism. +This particular beauty, I say, is irreconcilable with that other beauty +of which you spoke." + +"How so?" asked the millionaire. + +"There resides, for example, in Hellenic sculpture a certain +ingredient--what shall we call it? Let us call it the factor of +strangeness, of mystery! It is a vague emanation which radiates from +such works of art, and gives us a sense of their universal +applicability to all our changing moods and passions. That, I suppose, +is why we call them ever young. They beckon to all of us familiarly and +yet, as it were, from an unexplored world. They speak to us at all +seasons in some loving and yet enigmatical language, such language as +we may read, at times, in the eyes of a child that wakes from sleep. +Now the swiftest and fairest steam-engine in the world is not for ever +young; it grows obsolete and ends, after a short life, on the +scrap-heap. That is to say, where usefulness enters, this spirit of +mystery, of eternal youth, is put to flight. And there is yet another +element of classical beauty which is equally at variance with your +modern conception of it: the element of authority. Beholding the +Praxitelean Eros, the veriest ruffian feels compelled to reverence the +creator and his work. 'Who was the man?' he asks; for he acknowledges +that such things impose themselves upon his untutored mind. Now a +certain Monsieur Cadillac builds the most beautiful motor-cars. Who is +this man? We do not care a fig about him. He is probably a Jewish +syndicate. Such being the case, I cannot bring myself to reverence +Monsieur Cadillac and his cars. They are comfortable, but that factor +of authority, which compels our homage to the Eros, is wholly lacking. +Yet both things are called beautiful. That we should apply the same +word to products so different, so hopelessly conflicting, as those of +Praxiteles and Monsieur Cadillac--what does it prove? It proves our +poverty of invention. And what does it explain? It explains our +confusion of thought." + +The millionaire remarked: + +"I suppose the human outlook has shifted with the years. Democracy hyas +changed your old point of view." + +"Assuredly. No American, no modern of any race, I fancy, can divest +himself of the notion that one man is as good as another; in the eyes +of God, they add--meaning in their own eyes. No Greek, no ancient of any +race, I fancy, could have burdened himself with so preposterous a +delusion. Democracy has killed my point of view. It has substituted +progress for civilization. To appreciate things of beauty, as do the +Americans, a man requires intelligence. Intelligence is compatible with +progress. To create them, as did the Greeks, he requires intelligence +and something else as well: time. Democracy, in abolishing slavery, has +eliminated that element of time--an element which is indispensable to +civilization." + +"We have some fine slavery in America at this moment." + +"I am using the word in the antique sense. Your modern slavery is of +another kind. It has all the drawbacks and few of the advantages of the +classic variety. It gives leisure to the wrong people--to those who +praise the dignity of labour. Men who talk about the Dignity of Labour +had better say as little as possible about civilization, for fear of +confusing it with the North Pole." + +The American laughed. + +"That's one for me!" he remarked. + +"On the contrary! You are an admirable example of that happy graft +which we mentioned just now." + +"Progress and civilization!" exclaimed Mr. Heard. "One uses those words +so much in my walk of life that, thinking it over, I begin to wonder +whether they mean more than this: that there are perpetual +readjustments going on. They are supposed to indicate an upward +movement, some vague step in the direction of betterment which, +frankly, I confess myself unable to perceive. What is the use of +civilization if it makes a man unhappy and unhealthy? The uncivilized +African native is happy and healthy. The poor creatures among whom I +worked, in the slums of London, are neither the one nor the other; they +are civilized. I glance down the ages, and see nothing but--change! And +perhaps not even change. Mere differences of opinion as to the value of +this or that in different times and places." + +"Pardon me! I was using the words in a specific sense. What I mean by +progress is the welding together of society for whatever ends. Progress +is a centripetal movement, obliterating man in the mass. Civilization +is centrifugal; it permits, it postulates, the assertion of +personality. The terms are, therefore, not synonymous. They stand for +hostile and divergent movements. Progress subordinates. Civilization +co-ordinates. The individual emerges in civilization. He is submerged +in progress." + +"You might call civilization a placid lake," said the American, "and +the other a river or torrent." + +"Exactly!" remarked Mr. Heard. "The one is static, the other dynamic. +And which of the two, Count, would you say was the more beneficial to +humanity?" + +"Ah! For my part I would not bring such consideration to bear on the +point. We may deduce, from the evolution of society, that progress is +the newer movement, since the State, which welds together, is of more +recent growth than the individualistic family or clan. This is as far +as I care to go. To debate whether one be better for mankind than the +other betrays what I call an anthropomorphic turn of mind; it is +therefore a problem which, so far as I am concerned, does not exist. I +content myself with establishing the fact that progress and +civilization are incompatible, mutually exclusive." + +"Do you mean to say," asked the millionaire, "that it is impossible to +be progressive and civilized at the same time?" + +"That is what I mean to say. Now if America stands for progress, this +old world may be permitted--with a reasonable dose of that flattery +which we accord to the dead--to represent civilization. Tell me, Mr. van +Koppen, how do you propose to amalgamate or reconcile such ferociously +antagonistic strivings? I fear we will have to wait for the +millennium." + +"The millennium!" echoed Mr. Heard. "That is another of those unhappy +words which are always cropping up in my department." + +"Why unhappy?" asked Mr. van Koppen. + +"Because they mean nothing. The millennium will never come." + +"Why not?" + +"Because nobody wants it to come. They want tangible things. Nobody +wants a millennium." + +"Which is very fortunate," observed the Count. "For if they did, the +Creator would be considerably embarrassed how to arrange matters, +seeing that every man's millennium differs from that of his neighbour. +Mine is not the same as yours. Now I wonder, Mr. van Koppen--I wonder +what your millennium would be like?" + +"I wonder! I believe I never gave it a thought. I have had other things +to puzzle out." + +And the millionaire straightway proceeded to think, in his usual +clear-cut fashion. "Something with girls in it," he soon concluded, +inwardly. Then aloud: + +"I guess my millennium would be rather a contradictory sort of +business. I should require tobacco, to begin with. And the affair would +certainly not be complete, Count, without a great deal of your company. +The millennium of other people may be more simple. That of the Duchess, +for example, is at hand. She is about to join the Roman Catholic +Church." + +"That reminds me," said Mr. Heard. "She gave me some remarkable +tea-cakes not long ago. Delicious. She said they were your specialty." + +"You have found them out, have you?" laughed the American. "I always +tell her that once a man begins on those tea-cakes there is no reason +on earth, that I can think of, why he should ever stop again. All the +same, I nearly overate myself the other day. That was because we had a +late luncheon on board. It shall never occur again--the late luncheon, I +mean. Have you discovered, by the way, whether the business of Miss +Wilberforce has been settled?" + +Mr. Heard shook his head. + +"Is that the person," enquired the Count, "who is reported to drink to +excess? I have never spoken to her. She belongs presumably to the lower +classes--to those who extract from alcohol the pleasurable emotions +which we derive from a good play, or music, or a picture gallery." + +"She is a lady." + +"Indeed? Then she has relapsed into the intemperance of her inferiors. +That is not pretty." + +"Temperance!" said the bishop. "Another of those words which I am +always being obliged to use. Pray tell me, Count, what you mean by +temperance." + +"I should call it the exercise of our faculties and organs in such a +manner as to combine the maximum of pleasure with the minimum of pain." + +"And who is the judge of what constitutes the dividing line between use +and abuse?" + +"We cannot do better, I imagine, than go to our own bodies for an +answer to that question. They will tell us exactly how far we may +proceed with impunity." + +"In that case," said the millionaire, "if you drink a little too much +occasionally--only occasionally, I mean!--you would not call that +intemperance?" + +"Certainly not. We are not Puritans here. We do not give wrong names to +things. What you suggest would be by the way of a change, I +presume--like the eating of a pike: something we do not indulge in every +day. If I were to come home a little joyful now and then, do you know +what these people would say? They would say: 'The old gentleman is +pleased to be merry to-night. Bless his heart! May the wind do him +good.' But if I behaved as Miss Wilberforce is reported to do, they +would say: 'That old man is losing self-control. He is growing +intemperate. Every evening! It is not a pretty sight.' They never call +it wrong. Their mode of condemnation is to say that it is not pretty. +The ethical moment, you observe, is replaced by an aesthetic one. That +is the Mediterranean note. It is the merit of the Roman Church that she +left us some grains of common sense in regard to minor morals." + +The bishop remarked: + +"What I have seen of the local Catholicism strikes me as a kind of +pantomime. That is the fault of my upbringing, no doubt." + +"Oh, I am not referring to externals! Externally, of course, our Church +is the purest rococo--" + +Mr. Heard was expanding in this congenial atmosphere; he felt himself +in touch with permanent things. He glanced at the speaker. How charming +he looked, this silvery-haired old aristocrat! His ample and gracious +personality, his leisurely discourse--how well they accorded with the +environment! He suggested, in manner, the secret of youth and all that +is glad, unclouded, eternal; he was a reflection, a belated flower, of +the classic splendour which lay in ruins about him. Such a man, he +thought, deserves to be happy and successful. What joy it must have +been to a person of his temperament--the chance discovery of the Locri +Faun! + +A great stillness brooded upon the enclosure beyond. The shadows had +shifted. Sunny patches lay, distributed in fresh patterns, upon the old +brickwork flooring. An oval shaft of light, glinting through the +foliage, had struck the pedestal of the Faun and was stealthily +crawling up its polished surface. He looked at the statue. It was still +slumbering in the shade. But a subtle change had spread over the +figure, or was it, he wondered, merely a change in the state of his own +mind, due to what the Count had said? There was energy, now, in those +tense muscles. The slightest touch, he felt, would unseal the +enchantment and cause life to flow through the dull metal. + +Mr. van Koppen was slightly ruffled. + +"Are you not a little hard on the Puritans?" he asked. "Where would we +have been without them in America?" + +"And after all," added the bishop, "they cleared up an infinity of +abuses. They were temperate, at all events! Too temperate in some +matters, I am inclined to think; they did not always allow for human +weakness. They went straight back to the Bible." + +The Count shook his head slowly. + +"The Bible," he said, "is the most intemperate book I have ever read." + +"Dear me!" + +Mr. van Koppen, a tactful person, scented danger ahead. He remarked: + +"I did not know Italians read the Bible. Where did you become +acquainted with it?" + +"In New York. I often amused myself strolling about the Jewish quarter +there and studying the inhabitants. Wonderful types, wonderful poses! +But hard to decipher, for a person of my race. One day I said to +myself: I will read their literature; it may be of assistance. I went +through the Talmud and the Bible. They helped me to understand those +people and their point of view." + +"What is their point of view?" + +"That God is an overseer. This, I think, is the keynote of the Bible. +And it explains why the Bible has always been regarded as an exotic +among Greco-Latin races, who are all pagans at heart. Our God is not an +overseer; he is a partaker. For the rest, we find the whole trend of +the Bible, its doctrinal tone, antagonistic to those ideals of +equanimity and moderation which, however disregarded in practice, have +always been held up hereabouts as theoretically desirable. In short, we +Southerners lack what you possess: an elective affinity with that book. +One may wonder how the morality of those tawny Semites was enabled to +graft itself upon your alien white-skinned race with such tenacity as +to influence your whole national development. Well, I think I have at +last puzzled it out," he added, "to my own satisfaction at least." + +The bishop interposed with a laugh: + +"I may tell you, Count, that I am not in the Episcopal mood to-day. Not +at all. Never felt less Episcopal in my life. For that matter, it is +our English ecclesiastics who have dealt some of the most serious blows +at Biblical authority of late, with their modern exegesis. Pray go on!" + +"I imagine it is nothing but a matter of racial temperament." + +"Goth and Latin?" + +"One does not always like to employ such terms; they are so apt to +cover deficiency of ideas, or to obscure the issue. But certainly the +sun which colours our complexion and orders our daily habits, +influences at the same time our character and outlook. The almost +hysterical changes of light and darkness, summer and winter, which have +impressed themselves on the literature of the North, are unknown here. +Northern people, whether from climatic or other causes, are prone to +extremes, like their own myths and sagas. The Bible is essentially a +book of extremes. It is a violent document. The Goth or Anglo-Saxon has +taken kindly to this book because it has always suited his purposes. It +has suited his purposes because, according to his abruptly varying +moods, he has never been at a loss to discover therein exactly what he +wanted--authority for every grade of emotional conduct, from savage +vindictiveness to the most abject self-abasement. One thing he would +never have found, had he cared to look for it--an incitement to live the +life of reason, to strive after intellectual honesty and self-respect, +and to keep his mind open to the logic of his five senses. That is why, +during the troubled Middle Ages when the oscillations of national and +individual life were yet abrupter--when, therefore, that classical +quality of temperance was more than ever at a discount--the Bible took +so firm a hold upon you. Its unquiet teachings responded to the unquiet +yearnings of men. Your conservatism, your reverence for established +institutions, has done the rest. No! I do not call to mind any passages +in the Bible commending the temperate philosophic life; though it would +be strange if so large a miscellany did not contain a few sound +reflections. Temperance," he concluded, as though speaking to +himself--"temperance! All the rest is embroidery." + +Mr. Heard was thoughtful. The American observed: + +"That side of the case never struck me before. How about Solomon's +proverbs?" + +"Maxims of exhaustion, my dear friend. It is easy to preach to me. I am +an old man. I can read Solomon with a certain patience. We want +something for our children--something which does not blight or deny, but +vivifies and guides aright; something which makes them hold up their +heads. A friend, an older brother; not a pedagogue. I would never +recommend a boy to study these writings. They would lower his spirits +and his self-respect. Solomon, like all reformed debauchees, has a +depressing influence on the young." + +"Do you know England well?" asked Mr. Heard. + +"Very little. I have spent a few days in Liverpool and London, here and +there, on my periodical journeyings to the States. Kind friends supply +me with English books and papers; the excellent Sir Herbert Street +sends me more than I can possibly digest! I confess that much of what I +read was an enigma to me till I had studied the Bible. Its teachings +seem to have filtered, warm and fluid, through the veins of your +national and private life. Then, slowly, they froze hard, congealing +the whole body into a kind of crystal. Your ethics are stereotyped in +black-letter characters. A gargoyle morality." + +"It is certainly difficult," said Mr. van Koppen, "for an Anglo-Saxon +to appraise this book objectively. His mind has been saturated with it +in childhood to such an extent as to take on a definite bias." + +"Like the ancients with their ILIAD. Where is a truer poet than Homer? +Yet the worship of him became a positive bane to independent creative +thought. What good things could be written about the withering +influence of Homer upon the intellectual life of Rome!" + +The bishop asked: + +"You think the Bible has done the same for us?" + +"I think it accounts for some Byzantine traits in your national +character and for the formlessness and hesitancy which I, at least, +seem to detect in the demeanour of many individual Anglo-Saxons. They +realize that their traditional upbringing is opposed to truth. It gives +them a sense of insecurity. It makes them shy and awkward. Poise! That +is what they need, and what this unbalanced Eastern stuff will never +give them." + +"The withering influences of Homer: surely that is a bad sign?" asked +the American. + +"And that of the Bible?" added Mr. Heard. + +"How shall a plant survive, save by withering now and then? If the +ancients had not exhausted themselves with Homer, the soil might not +have been ready for our Renaissance. A bad sign? Who can tell! Good and +bad--I question whether these are respectable words to use." + +"You are content, as you observed before, to establish a fact?" + +"Amply content. I leave the rest to the academicians. And the only fact +we seem to have established is that your notions of morality resemble +my notions of beauty in this one point: neither of them are up to date. +You will have be admire a steam-engine. Why? Because of its delicately +adjusted mechanism, its perfect adaptation to modern needs. So be it. I +will modify my conception of what is fair in appearance. I will admire +your steam-engine, and thereby bring my ideals of beauty up to date. +Will you modify your conception of what is fair in conduct? Will you +admire something more adapted to modern needs than those intemperate +Hebrew doctrines; something with more delicately adjusted mechanism? +The mendicant friar, that flower of Oriental ethics--he is not up to +date. He resembles all Semites. He lacks self-respect. He apologizes +for being alive. It is not pretty--to apologize for being alive!" + +The American observed: + +"I should say that even our greatest bigots, nowadays, don't take those +old doctrines as seriously as you seem to think." + +"I daresay they don't. But they profess to reproach themselves for not +doing so. And this is more contemptible. It adds insincerity to +imbecility." + +A sunny smile played about his face as he spoke these words. It was +evident that his thoughts were already far away. The bishop, following +the direction of his glance, saw that it rested upon the statuette of +the Faun whose head and shoulders were now enveloped in a warm beam of +light. Under that genial touch the old relic seemed to have woke up +from its slumber. Blood was throbbing in its veins. It was inn +movement; it dominated the scene in its emphatic affirmation of joy. + +Mr. Heard, his eyes fixed upon the statuette, now realized the +significance of what had been said. He began to see more clearly. Soon +it dawned upon him that not joy alone was expressed by the figure. +Another quality, more evasive yet more compelling, resided in its +subtle grace: the element of mystery. There, emprisoned in the bronze, +dwelt some benignant oracle. + +Puzzle as he would, that oracle refused to clothe itself in words. + +What could it be? + +A message of universal application, "loving and enigmatical," as the +old man had called it. True! It was a greeting from an unknown friend +in an unknown land; something familiar from the dim past or distant +future; something that spoke of well-being--plain to behold, hard to +expound, like the dawning smile of childhood. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXXI + + + + + +Towards evening, Mr. van Koppen drove the bishop down in the carriage +which he usually hired for the whole of his stay on Nepenthe. They said +little, having talked themselves out with the Count. The American +seemed to be thinking about something. Mr. Heard's eye roamed over the +landscape, rather anxiously. + +"I don't like that new cloud above the volcano," he observed. + +"Looks like ashes. Looks as if it might drift in our direction, doesn't +it, if the wind were strong enough to move it? Do you see much of the +Count?" he enquired. + +"Not as much as I should like. What excellent veal cutlets those were! +So white and tender. Quite different from the veal we get in England. +And that aromatic wine went uncommonly well with them. It was his own +growth, I suppose." + +"Very likely. From that little vineyard which produces so many good +things." He chuckled softly. "As to English veal--I never yet tasted any +worth eating. If you don't slaughter a calf till it's grown into a +cow--why, you're not likely to get anything but beef." + +"They say the English cannot cook, in spite of the excellence of their +prime materials." + +"I think the prime materials are at fault. They sacrifice everything to +size. It's barbaric. Those greasy Southdown sheep! It's the same with +their fowls; they're large, but insipid--very different from the little +things you get down here. Now a goose is capital fodder. But if you +grow him only for his weight, you destroy his quality and flavour; you +get a lump of blubber instead of a bird." + +"Apple sauce?" + +"I don't like apples in any shape. A sour kind of potato, I call them. +They eat an awful lot of apples in our country. That is what makes so +many of our women as flat as boards, in front and behind--especially in +the Eastern States. It's apple-eating. Apples ought to be taxed. They +ruin the female figure. I'm not sure that they don't sour the character +as well." + +"Don't you care about our English vegetables?" + +"Can't say I'm much in love with them, Mr. Heard. Brussels sprouts, for +instance--I'm very partial to Brussels sprouts. But the things they give +you over there are the size of a bath sponge, and much the same taste, +I reckon. And the carrots! A carrot ought to be small and round and +yellow, it ought to melt in the mouth like a plum. Those carrots aren't +carrots at all. They're walking sticks. And the peas! No, I don't care +about English peas. Too large and too lively for me." + +"Lively?" + +"That's it. Lively. I shall never forget my first experience of them," +he went on, laughing. "There were two or three in the dish; just two or +three; filled it up nicely. Looked like cannon-balls. What do they +expect me to do with these things? I wondered. I didn't like to ask the +waiter. One doesn't care to be taken for an ignorant stranger. Well, I +landed one on my plate and began carving at it, to see if there was +anything eatable inside the shell, when the durned thing slipped away +from my knife and crashed on to the floor. Bounced up like a marble. I +called for a nutcracker--'I shall want the largest you've got,' I said. +They couldn't find one. Now I'm not the sort of man, Mr. Heard, to be +beaten by a vegetable, if it really was a vegetable. Because, you see, +it behaved more like a blamed mineral. I sent for the head waiter, and +took him into my confidence. I tried to talk English, like I'm talking +to you. 'What d'ye call these things?' I asked. 'Marrowfats, Sir.' 'Ah, +I thought they weren't peas. You've got PETITS POIS down on the bill of +fare. Better get that put right. And now, how d'ye eat them?' 'You bite +them!' That's what he said. 'You bite them.' Of course I didn't believe +him. I thought it was just a bit of English humour, especially as the +other waiter was looking the opposite way all the time. Well, like a +fool, I said to myself: 'No harm in trying!' I've got pretty sharp +teeth, you know, for a boy of my age. That's how I managed to do what a +lot of you younger fellows couldn't have done. I got them fixed into +the softest of that bunch of marrowfats. But as to pulling them out +again! The head waiter, you bet, had disappeared. And the other fellow +was standing at the window with his back to me. Looking up the street, +I should say, to see if it was going to rain." + +After this little outburst, the millionaire seemed to have nothing more +to say. + +He was thinking.... + +Cornelius van Koppen loved a good liar. He knew something about the +gentle art. It was an art, he used to say, which no fool should be +allowed to cultivate. There were too many amateurs knocking about. +These bunglers spoiled the trade. Without doing any good to themselves, +they roused distrust; they rubbed the fine bloom off human credulity. +His puritan conscience was enraged at petty thefts, petty forgeries, +petty larcenies. That was why he despised that otherwise excellent +person, the Financial Commissioner for Nicaragua, whose wildest flights +of embezzlement never exceeded a few hundred dollars. He respected a +man who, like himself, could work in the grand style. To play upon the +credulity of a continent--it was Napoleonic, it was like stealing a +kingdom; it was not stealing at all. This, he shrewdly suspected, was +what his good friend the Count was engaged upon. That delightful old +man was working in the grand style. + +Bronzes, ancient or modern, were Greek to Mr. van Koppen. He could not +tell the difference between the art of Clodion and of Myron--had, in +fact, never heard the names of these good people and did not +particularly care to hear them; he paid Sir Herbert Street for that +part of the business. But he had picked up, in the course of his long +humanitarian career, a good deal of general knowledge. Old Koppen was +no fool. He was intelligent; intelligence, as the Count had said, being +perfectly compatible with progress. The millionaire could put two and +two together as fast as most men; he was celebrated, even among his +quick-witted compatriots, for an uncanny faculty of walking round +people without getting off his chair. Common sense, he called it. + +Many a time he had listened to Count Caloveglia's rounded periods anent +the Locri Faun. Taking his own personal experience as a guide, he had +come to the conclusion that a man does not explain things quite so +satisfactorily, unless he has some business in hand. Everything fitted +into a hypothesis which had been slowly maturing in his mind, namely, +that he was confronted by a fraud, a really noble fraud, a fraud after +his own heart, a fraud deserving the fullest support of every sensible +man and woman. + +That vineyard, for instance, with those antiquities. A good many +friends of his in the States had made their pile out of salted gold +mines. Why not salt a vineyard? Oh yes; everything fitted in +beautifully. The remoteness of that vineyard ... a town like Locri +was obviously unsafe, too public a place for such important +discoveries. The conscientious Sir Herbert would certainly want to make +enquiries on the spot--enquiries which would prove that no Faun had ever +been found there. And that would ruin everything. Therefore the statue +had been "carried" to the vineyard in ancient times by "some young and +ardent lover of art." Carried, ha, ha! His knowledge of human nature +made him doubt whether the Locri Faun had ever in its life made a +further journey than to Caloveglia's shady courtyard from that +mysterious, dusty shed at the back of his house. Or the Demeter either. +That "sadly mutilated head" was a feeler--a rehearsal. They both came +"from the same workshop." Excellent! That shed was the workshop--the +birthplace of these two antiques; the Count himself their old Hellenic +creator. + +Andrea, no doubt, was the secret. + +These art experts! Here was Street, one of the best of them, a man of +celebrity in his department, solemnly pronouncing for the authenticity +of the fake--in the full and innocent conviction that it was really +authentic. A sucking babe. This man, he could see by his simple society +face, had not even made an arrangement with the Count as to a +commission for himself in the event of a purchase being concluded. He +was satisfied with his salary. These experts--what a crowd of fools they +were! Especially the honest ones. + +None the less, he was delighted with Sir Herbert's opinion. It was +exactly what he wanted. For he meant to help the County who, he was +sure, would never accept a cent from him save under a pretext like that +of the sale of the Faun. He loved old Caloveglia. There was something +clean and purposeful about him. His friendship with such a man filled +up what he knew to be a void in his own equipment as citizen of the +world. And the count was working--was lying--for a worthy purpose: a +daughter's dowry. For that reason alone he was deserving of assistance. + +Mr. van Koppen was unmarried. Knowing life as he did, from its more +seamy or mercenary side, he had never brought himself to accept a +single one of several hundred offers of marriage which had been more or +less overtly made to him--to his millions. He loved the sex, as a whole; +but distrusted them individually. He thought he knew exactly what they +were after. Pearl necklaces and things. He was a good American; fond of +bestowing pearl necklaces. But he liked to give them when, and to whom, +he fancied; he meant to be his own master and to keep his painfully +gotten millions under his own control. All of which, far from +extinguishing, actually fostered that queer bachelor's feeling of +reverential awe for the married state and its results. Every form of +courage and success appealed to van Koppen--none more than the reckless +impetuosity of a man who speculates in such a delirious lottery and +sometimes actually draws a prize. Such had been Count Caloveglia's +portion. His marriage had plainly been a love-match; a success; its +result, this offspring--a daughter of whom any father might be proud. +Mr. van Koppen thoroughly understood the Count's position. These +Italians need dowries for their girls. Well, he should have one! What +did it signify? One pearl necklace the less, for some operatic charmer. +Not worth talking about. Among all h is various benefactions, none was +ever projected with a lighter heart, with more sincere pleasure. It +made him glad to be a millionaire. + +All the details had been settled. The FLUTTERBY was sailing in a day or +two. The relic would be brought on board, at dead of night, by the +faithful Andrea, who would return to the Count with a cheque in his +pocket. It was a considerable sum; so considerable that Caloveglia had +displayed great hesitation in accepting it. But the millionaire pointed +out that the parties must be guided by Sir Herbert's opinion. What was +the good, he asked, of employing a specialist? Sir Herbert Street had +declared the bronze to be priceless, unique. His employer, therefore, +insisted on paying what the other had called "an adequate amount, if +the value of such a work of art can be expressed in monetary figures at +all." There was nothing more to be said. The Count gave way, with +graceful reluctance. A sham ancestry having been manufactured for the +masterpiece (it was proved to come from Asia Minor) in order to elude +the vigilance of the Italian Government, the Locri Faun could +thereafter be freely displayed to the American public, and Sir Herbert +Street was probably right in foretelling that it would be the show +piece of the millionaire's museum-artists and antiquarians flocking to +see it from every part of the world. + +And Mr. van Koppen, as he drove along, was thinking of that cheque; he +was converting the dollars into francs. They made rather an awkward +sum. He decided to round it off, if only for the sake of appearances; a +further reason for not sending the cheque till the last moment, +together with a carefully worded letter to allay the Count's scruples. +The old fellow might otherwise return the balance, in a fit of +conscientiousness. Like himself, Count Caloveglia was infernally, and +very properly, punctilious--in small matters. + +Yes, there was some fun, at times, in being a millionaire. Or a +sculptor either, for that matter! For it evidently took some doing--a +little thing like that Locri Faun. It took some doing. And it was worth +doing: that was the main point. A man who could bamboozle Sir Herbert +Street--such a man deserved to be supported. And what if the truth +ultimately leaked out? Had he not acted with the best intentions, under +the written advice of an expert? Far from feeling uneasy, Mr. van +Koppen smiled at the thought of how his millions, backed by the opinion +of a connoisseur of international reputation, had enabled him to play +yet one more trick upon that great Republic whose fathomless +gullibility no one had ever exploited to a better purpose than +himself.... + +Mr. Eames was waiting for the bishop, according to appointment. + +"How about Mrs. Meadows?" he at once began. + +"She was out, invisible. I waited nearly two hours and then lunched +with Count Caloveglia. By the way, have you seen anything of Denis +lately?" + +"No. Why?" + +"The old man seemed to be concerned about him. He asked me to make +enquiries. Van Koppen thought that he might have got into trouble with +some girl. But that strikes me as very unlikely. He may be a little +homesick and lonely, so far from his mother." + +The bibliographer said: + +"I understand Mr. van Koppen is quite an authority on girls. As to +Denis, I saw him last--when was it? Oh, not so very long ago. The day +all those funny things happened; those portents. We walked up and down +together on this very terrace. Perhaps he has left the island, like +that wretched mineralogist who promised me--never mind! He seemed all +right then. A little depressed, perhaps. Yes; a little depressed, no I +come to think of it. But the Count need not be anxious. This island is +a great place for scares and rumours." + +Mr. Heard was not satisfied. + +"Do you believe the influence of Nepenthe can make Northern people +irresponsible for their actions? Keith does. Or how about the sirocco? +Can it upset their nerves to such an extent?" + +"Not my nerves. I have heard of people making fools of themselves and +then blaming the Creator. Often! And of course, if one begins to brood +over accidentals like the weather, one is sure to become a lunatic +sooner or later. Weather was not made for that purpose. If you come to +think of it, how few days there are when a man can honestly say that +the weather is quite to his liking! It is nearly always too hot or too +cold or too wet or too dry or too windy. I don't trouble myself about +sirocco. Why should Denis? He is not nearly as much of a fool as many +people look. And I would not listen to Keith. He moves among +hyperbolas." + +Mr. Heard felt slightly relieved. What a sensible fellow this was; so +matter-of-fact and sure of his ground. The ideal scholar. Sirocco did +not exist for him. He stood aloof from human passions and infirmities. + +It was plain that the bishop had never heard that story about the +BALLON CAPTIF. + +"For my part," he said, "I am beginning to object to this south wind. I +never felt it worse than to-day. Phew! Stifling! One can hardly +breathe. My shirt is sticking to my back. Suppose we sit down +somewhere?" + +They found a bench, in view of the sea and the volcano. The population +moved sedately up and down before their eyes. + +"Is it always like this?" enquired Mr. Heard. + +"Spring is a little warmer than usual. Or perhaps one should say that +summer has begun earlier. The sirocco is the same, year after year, +although there is a kind of conspiracy among the foreign residents to +say that it happens to be worse than usual that particular season. It +never varies." + +"What does your Perrelli say on the subject?" + +Mr. Eames glanced at him distrustfully. + +"You are trying to chaff me," he said. "Serves me right for talking so +much this morning. I am afraid I bored you dreadfully." + +The bishop wanted to know. + +"Then I may tell you that Monsignor Perrelli does not so much as +mention the South wind. He names all the others and has come capital +observations on the anchorages of the island as adapted to different +winds and seasons. He has also extracted from old chronicles the +records of the great storms of 1136, 1342, 1373, 1460, and so on; but +never discloses the fact that they all blew from the south. He says the +air is pleasant, tempered by gentle breezes from the sea. The word +sirocco does not occur in his pages save once, when he laments its +prevalence on the mainland." + +"The old humbug!" + +A little shiver ran through Mr. Eames. Then he observed, in a suave +tone of voice: + +"He was an historian of the period, an agreeable gentleman telling +others of his kind what he knows will be of interest to them. That is +what makes his work attractive to me: the personality of the writer. +The facts that he records, taken in conjunction with those he slurs +over or omits--they give one such an insight into changing human nature! +You can construct the character of a man and his age not only from what +he does and says, but from what he fails to say and do." + +"Modern historians are not like that," said Mr. Heard. "They give you +the truth to the best of their ability. It is rather dry reading +sometimes. I would like to borrow your Perrelli for a day or two, if +you don't mind." + +"I'll send it round, together with some old prints of this island and +modern photographs. You will then see what I mean. The prints are not +exactly true to nature; these people did not want to be true to nature. +And yet they convey a better impression of the place than the modern +pictures. Perhaps there are two truths: the truth of fact and that of +suggestion. Perrelli is very suggestive; romance grafted upon +erudition, and blossoming out of it! So imaginative! He has a +dissertation on the fishes of Nepenthe--it reads like a poem and is yet +full of practical gastronomic hints. Can you picture Virgil +collaborating with Apicius?" + +The bishop said: + +"Horace might have got on better with that old BON-VIVANT." + +"Horace could never have had a hand in this chapter. He lacks the +idealistic tinge. He could never have written about red mullets as +Perrelli writes when he compares their skin to the fiery waves of +Phelgethon, to the mantle of rosy-fingered dawn, to the blush of a +maiden surprised in her bath, and then goes on to tell you how to cook +the b east in thirty different ways and how to spit out the bones in +the most noiseless, genteel fashion. That is Perrelli--so original, so +leisurely. Always himself! He smiled as he wrote; there is not a shadow +of doubt about it. In another section, on the fountains of the island, +he deliberately indulges in the humour of some old mediaeval schoolman. +Then there is a chapter on the ecclesiastical conditions of the place +under Florizel the Fat--it is full of veiled attacks on the religious +orders of his own day; I suspect it got him into trouble, that chapter. +I am sorry to say there is a good deal of loose talk scattered about +his pages. I fear he was not altogether a pure-minded man. But I cannot +bring myself to despise him. What do you think? Certain problems are +always cropping up, aren't they?" + +Mr. Eames suddenly looked quite troubled. + +"They are," replied the bishop, who was not in a mood to discuss ethics +just then. "What are you going to do about it?" he added. + +"About what?" + +"This poetic omission on the part of Perrelli to mention the sirocco?" + +"It has given me a deal of extra work, I can assure you. I have had to +go into the whole question. I have tabulated no less than fifty-seven +varieties of sirocco. Sailors' words, most of them; together with a +handful of antiquated terms. Fifty-seven varieties. Twenty-three +thousand words, up to the present, dealing the with south wind." + +"That is a fair-sized foot-note," laughed the bishop. "A good slice of +a book, I should call it." + +"My foot-notes are to be printed in small type. In fact, I am thinking +of casting the whole of this sirocco--material into an appendix. Too +much, you think? Surely the number of words is not disproportionate to +the subject? The south wind is a good slice of Nepenthe, is it not?... +Look! That cloud has made up its mind to come our way after all. +There will be another shower of ashes. Sirocco, you observe...." + +The terrace, meanwhile, had become crowded. Already the evening sun was +slightly obscured behind a brown haze. Ashes were traveling fast. They +began to fall, softly. + +What was to be done? Everybody, mindful of the previous experience, was +in favour of a second procession to take place immediately. The PARROCO +held the same opinion. For form's sake, however, he dispatched a +confidential messenger to learn the views of Mr. Parker, who was +sitting dejectedly in his study with the incomplete Financial Report +still staring him in the face. The Commissioner pulled himself together +with praiseworthy alacrity and gave his whole mind to the question. + +No. On due consideration, he was opposed to the idea of a procession. +Having enjoyed, in various continents and various capacities, some +experience of backing the same horse twice over, Mr. Parker was not in +favour of demanding a second largesse from the Saint. It might spoil +everything, he said. Let them wait till next morning. If there was a +deep fall like last time, the experiment might be worth trying. But not +just yet! While admitting that something ought to be done, it struck +him as a hazardous proceeding to play fast and loose, in this fashion, +with the reputation of a Saint. + +His Reverence, duly impressed, waited for half an hour. It was then +seen that the Nicaraguan Representative had once more given the +soundest of advice. The downpour of ashes ceased abruptly, at the +moment when the sun sank into the sea. No mischief was done. + +Late at night another phenomenon became visible. The volcano was +observed to be in violent eruption. It blazed forth like a gigantic +torch held into the heavens. Streams of lava poured down the mountain +flanks, reddening sky and sea. + +Nepenthe was consoled by the spectacle. The demon had at last found an +outlet--a method of relief. There would be no more showers of ashes. The +fact that villages were being overwhelmed under a deluge of flame, +vineyards scorched and hundreds of innocent folks, their retreat cut +off by fiery torrents, were even then being roasted to death, was no +concern to the islanders. It only proved what every one knew: that the +jurisdiction of their Patron Saint did not extend to the mainland. + +Each of those villages had its own Saint, whose business it was to +forestall accidents of this kind. If they failed in their duty through +incapacity or mulishness, nothing was easier than to get rid of them; +there were others to choose from--dozens of others, waiting for the job! +Thinking thus, the islanders gave vent to an immense sigh if relief. +They wished long life to their Patron Saint, with whose services they +had reason to be satisfied. Their own crops and lives were safe from +harm, thanks to the martyr Dodekanus. He loved his people, and they +loved him. He was a protector worthy of the name--not like those +low-bred bastards across the water. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXXII + + + + + +Mr. Heard had just finished his early Italian luncheon. Sitting at his +coffee and smoking a cigarette, in a mood of considerable contentment, +he gazed over the mirror-like surface of the sea towards the volcano, +whose pyrotechnical display on the previous evening had kept him awake +to a late hour. Yet another glistering day! Each one warmer than the +last, and never a change in the wind! Presently he would retire for an +hour or two into his cool and darkened bed-room. + +One little thing troubled his mind. There had been no reply to the +note--a kind of note of enquiry--which he had left at the villa Mon Repos +on the preceding day. Though he knew little of his cousin, he could not +help feeling anxious. She was all by herself in that lonely little +place, suffering--perhaps, and too proud or too shy to complain. Mr. +Eames' description of her had made him uneasy. Why should she look as +if she had seen a ghost? What could that signify? The bibliographer was +a level-headed person, by no means given to flights of imagination. +Imperceptibly, he felt, there had been established an under-current of +sympathy between himself and this solitary woman, whom everybody seemed +to like. She was different from the ordinary type; the kind of woman +whom a man could not help respecting. She contrasted favourably with +some of his recent female acquaintances who, however charming or witty, +dissatisfied him in this or that particular. His cousin's devotion to +child and husband appealed to his heart. She seemed to be perfect of +her kind. + +Africa had boiled most of the starch out of Mr. Heard. But his +acquaintance with some of the saddest and wildest aspects of womanhood +only deepened his conviction of the sanctity of the sex. Some called +him old-fashioned or quixotic, because he was not altogether in +sympathy with modern feministic movements; they called him an idealist, +because he had preserved his belief in the sacred mission of women upon +earth--his childlike faith in the purity of their souls. They were a +humanizing influence, the guardian angels of mankind, the inspirers, +the mothers, the protectors of innocence. It pleased him to think that +woman had softened harsh dealings between man and man; that every +mitigation of savagery, every incitement to worthy or heroic actions, +was due to her gentle words, her encouraging example. From the very +dawn of history woman had opposed herself to deeds of violence. What +was it Count Caloveglia had said? "Temperance. All the rest is +embroidery." How well the old man could put things! Temperance.... +His cousin, from what he could guess of her character, agreed with that +description. Mr. Heard would have maintained against the whole world +that a woman, a true woman like this, could do no wrong. + +And now he gathered that she was in trouble of some kind. Then why not +allow him to help? He had asked for an early reply to his note. Well, +perhaps it would arrive by the evening post. + +Slightly vexed none the less, he laid down the stump of his cigarette, +preparatory to retiring for the hot hours of the day. One owes +something to oneself, N'EST-CE PAS? At that moment there was a knock at +his door. + +Denis entered. His face, shaded under a broad-brimmed hat, was ruddy +with the heat. He wore light flannels, and was carrying his jacket on +his arm. There was a large parcel in his hand. He looked the picture of +health. + +Mr. Heard, on rising, gave him a critical glance. He remembered his +trip in the boat, and the suicide's rock--that black, ominous cliff; he +remembered the thoughts which had passed through his mind at the time. +Was this the kind of boy to kill himself? Surely not. Keith must have +been mistaken. And Count Caloveglia--was he mistaken too? Evidently. +There was nothing tragic about Denis. He was brimming over with life. +His troubles, whatever they were, must have been forgotten. + +"I've been lunching with Keith," he began. "He made me tell him a +fairy-tale." + +"Sit down and have some coffee! You came away very early." + +"He told me he wanted to go to sleep after luncheon. And one or two +other nice things." + +Ah, thought Mr. Heard, Keith was acting up to what he had said in the +boat; he was being good to the boy; that was right of him. + +"I'm sure," he said, "that Keith has been speaking kindly to you." + +"Kindly? It's like talking to an earthquake. He told me to dominate my +reflexes. He called me a perambulating echo. He said I was a human +amoeba--" + +"Amoeba. What's that?" + +"A sort of animal that floats about trying to attach itself to +something which it can't find." + +"I think I see what he means. Anything else?" + +"He said I was a chameleon." + +"A chameleon!" + +"A chameleon that needed the influence of a good woman. Then he gave me +this box of Cuban chocolates, to keep me from crying, I suppose. Have +one! They're not nearly as nasty as they look." + +"Thanks. A chameleon. That is really interesting, as Keith would say. I +have seen thousands of them. Outlandish beasts, that anchor themselves +by their tails and squint horribly. Let's have a look at you, Denis. +No, I fail to detect any striking resemblance." + +"I believe he meant that I take on the colour of other people and have +none of my own. Then he told me to go and murder somebody." + +"I wouldn't do that, Denis," laughed the bishop. "Murders are so +dreadfully vulgar." + +"He said it might make a man of me. He forgets that I'm not quite his +age." + +"You had better not tell him that! Any other advice?" + +"Nothing new. He said I made a mistake in paying attention to what +human beings said and did, and that I ought to forsake mankind for a +while, and art and books and so on. You know the way he talks! He said +it would give me a stronger individuality if I came into contact with +nature and thought things out for myself instead of listening to other +people. He advised me to sit among the rocks at midnight and in the hot +afternoons, conversing with the genii of earth and air. It would +correct my worldly perspective. I think he may be right, in a way. +There is something in it. So I asked him to climb into the hills with +me, then and there, in order to get into touch with elemental Powers. +He said he thought highly of my character, but as to climbing about in +this heat--he said he'd be damned if he would. Those were his very +words. He wanted to sleep. He was too old for that sort of thing." + +"Very sensible, I'm sure." + +"You think so? Because then--then he told me that you were the proper +person for an expedition of that kind. He suggested I should come and +see you about it at once--it would allow him time to get his usual +afternoon nap. That is why I'm here. So do! It isn't so very hot, once +you get used to it. We are sure to see something funny." + +"Oh!" + +This, thought the bishop, was a pretty example of that doctrine of +benevolent egotism which Keith had expounded to him once or twice. A +very pretty example! + +"He said that?" + +Denis nodded. + +The notion was distasteful to Mr. Heard. To go out into this torrid +sunshine.... He, too, was not exactly young; moreover, he was still +rather delicate--he needed all the rest he could get. He was looking +forward with positive delight to the coming hours in his cool bedroom. + +"You really want me to climb to the top of a mountain at this hour of +the day and sit there in the heat, waiting for some wretched demon to +reveal himself? Aren't you a little too old for that sort of thing? +Come now! Does it strike you as a reasonable proposition? With the +thermometer at seventy-eight in this room?" + +"Keith said you liked nothing better. He said you might take offence if +I didn't ask you to come." + +He seemed to be disappointed. + +There were not many people for whom Mr. Heard would have put himself +out just then in that particular way; and Denis, up to a few days ago, +was certainly not one of them. The bishop had never been drawn towards +this rather precious youth. He was not Mr. Heard's type of boy. There +was a lack of grit and stamina about him--something soft, both in manner +and appearance; something dreamy, ambiguous, almost epicene. Mr. Heard +had not quite lost his old British instinct as to the fundamental +uselessness of all art. A young fellow who, instead of taking up some +rational profession, talked about Cimabue and Jacopo Bellini ... +there was something not quite right with him. Jacopo Bellini! But even +while thinking what to reply, he was conscious of having undergone a +slight change of feeling lately. He was growing more tolerant and +benign, even in trifles like this. Jacopo Bellini: why not? Meanwhile, +he bethought himself of a way of escape. + +"Suppose you go alone? Or why not try the midnight expedition first? I +might manage midnight." + +"I've tried it." + +"Alone?" he laughed. "No success?" + +"None whatever," said Denis. And it seemed as if a shadow flitted +across his face at these words. + +That cloud, that change of tone--what did they portend? Something might +be wrong, then, after all. Perhaps Keith had been correct in his +diagnosis when he observed that a susceptible mind like this could be +shaken out of its equilibrium by the influence of Nepenthe--"capable of +anything in this clear pagan light." It was not Mr. Heard's habit to +probe into the feelings of others--as to those of a person like Denis he +did not pretend to understand them. Artistic people! Incalculable! +Inconsequential! Irresponsible! Quite another point of view! Yet he +could not help thinking of that doleful black rock, with the +turquoise-tinted water at its foot. Remembering these things he felt a +sudden access of sympathy towards this lonesome fellow-creature. +Instead of pursuing the subject of the expedition he asked, quite +abruptly: + +"Tell me, Denis, are you happy here?" + +"How odd that you should come with that question! I had a letter from +my mother this morning. She wants to know the same thing. And hanged if +I know what to say." + +Mr. Heard made up his mind. + +"Hanged if you know? Then I'll tell you. Write to say that you have met +the Bishop of Bampopo, who seems a perfectly respectable old fellow. +Uncommonly respectable! Tell her you rather like him. Tell her she can +find out all about him in Crockford or the Red Book. Tell her that he +will be happy to correspond with her, if she will allow it. Tell her +you feel sure he will look after you these last few days, before we all +go away. Tell her--oh, everything nice you can think of. You'll do that, +won't you? And now I will climb any mountain you like. Where are we +going?" + +"I have thought of a good place. Rather high up, but well worth it. I +feel sure something funny is going to happen to-day. Don't you notice a +kind of demonic influence in the air?" + +"I notice a kind of infernal heat, if that is the same thing. +Seventy-eight in this room! You will have to walk slowly. I am not in +good condition just yet. Wait a moment. I must take my field-glasses. I +never go without them." + +Mr. Heard, resigned to his fate, was filled at the same time with +anxiety. He could not drive Keith's words out of his head. Perhaps +Denis was really up to some mischief. Who could tell? His eagerness--his +curious language! That note of exaltation in his voice.... And what +did he mean by saying that something funny would happen? Was he +contemplating--? Above all, his dread of being unaccompanied! Mr. Heard +was aware that persons of unbalanced mind are apt to experience before +some critical outbreak a pathetic horror of solitude, as though, dimly +conscious of what was about to happen, they feared to trust themselves +alone. + +He meant to keep a sharp eye on Denis. + +Often, in later times, he recalled that trivial conversation. Every +word of it was graven on his memory. How more than strange that Denis +should have dragged him away that afternoon, to that particular spot, +at that very hour! By what a string of accidents had everything +happened.... + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXXIII + + + + + +It was nearly two o'clock. To step out of doors was like passing into a +furnace. Streets were deserted. The houses showed glaring white against +the cobalt of the firmament; their inhabitants lay asleep within, +behind closed shutters. Heat and silence brooded over the land. + +Climbing slowly aloft by a lava-paved lane they reached the +bibliographer's residence and paused awhile near its entrance. Mr. +Heard tried to picture the scholar's life in this two-roomed cottage; +he regretted having had no chance of visiting that amiable person in +his own abode. (Mr. Eames was chary of issuing invitations.) A life of +monastic severity. There was a small outhouse attached to one side of +the wall; it was the kitchen, Denis explained; Eames' only servant +being a boy whom he borrowed for an occasional morning's work from a +neighbouring farm which supplied him with dairy produce. + +"It isn't often used, that kitchen," said Denis. "He lives mostly on +bread and milk. Does his own marketing in the early hours. I met him +one day before breakfast, walking with a large brown basket on his arm. +Said he was buying anchovies. There was a big haul of them overnight. +He had heard about it. A penny a pound, he said. I noticed some lettuce +as well. A couple of oranges. Fine chap! He knows what he wants." + +The bishop looked over the gate. An air of friendly seclusion reigned +in this place. There was no pretence at a garden--not so much as a rose +tree or a snapdragon; the vines, of daintiest green but sternly +utilitarian, clambered up to the door-lintel, invading the very roof. +He pictured to himself the interior. Bare walls and floorings, a print +or two, a few trunks and packing cases utilized as seats, a bookshelf, +a plain table littered with manuscripts; somewhere, in that further +room, a camp bedstead whereon this man of single aim and purpose, this +monk of literature, was even then at rest like all sensible folks, and +dreaming--dreaming, presumably, of foot-notes. Happy mortal! Free from +all superfluities and encumbrances of the flesh! Enviable mortal! He +reduced earthly existence to its simplest and most effective terms; he +owed no man anything; he kept alive, on a miserable income, the sacred +flame of enthusiasm. To aspire, that was the secret of life. Thinking +thus, Mr. Heard began to understand the bibliographer's feeling for +Mrs. Meadows. She lived for her child--he for his work. They were alike; +calm and self-contained, both of them; incapable of illusions, of +excesses in thought or conduct. + +Without the doorway, in a small triangle of shade, sat is fox-terrier, +alert, head poised on one side in knowing fashion, ready to bark if the +visitors only touched the handle of the gate. Denis remarked: + +"He told me that dog was sick the other morning, just like Keith." + +"It had probably been eating something. I suppose they couldn't be +unwell, could they? What a heat, Denis! It's addling my old brains. +More slowly, please." + +An hour went by. Fatigue was beginning to tell upon Mr. Heard. They had +left he cultivated ground behind and were now ascending, by a cindery +track of pumice-stone, among grotesque blocks of lava and scoriae that +glowed like molten metal. Tufts of flowery broom scented the air. The +soil, so recently drenched by the miraculous shower of rain, was once +more dry and dusty; its fragile flowers wilted in the sirocco. And +still the young man marched ahead. Always upwards! The landscape grew +more savage. They bent round a corner and gound themselves skirting a +precipice. The bishop glanced down in trepidation. There lay the sea, +with not a boat in sight. As he continued to look the horizon +oscillated; the ground sank under his feet and blue waters seemed to +heave and rise up towards him. He shut his eyes in a fit of dizziness +and grasped a rock. Its burning touch revived him. + +Then on again. Always upwards. + +"Do walk a little more slowly," said the bishop, puffing and wiping his +face. "We must be well above the level of the Old Town by this time. A +wild scramble. How much higher are we going?" + +"Here we are. This is the place I meant." + +"Charming, I must say! But aren't we a little too near the edge of the +cliff? It makes me feel funny, as if I were in a balloon." + +"Oh, we'll get used to it. Let's sit down, Mr. Heard." + +Still distrustful of his companion, the bishop made himself comfortable +and glanced around. They were high up; the view embraced half the +island. The distant volcano confronting him was wreathed in sullen grey +smoke that rose up from its lava torrent, and crowned with a menacing +vapour-plume. Then an immensity of sea. At his feet, separated from +where he sat by wide stony tracts tremulous with heat, lay the Old +Town, its houses nestling in a bower of orchards and vineyards. It +looked like a shred of rose-tinted lace thrown upon he landscape. He +unraveled those now familiar thoroughfares and traced out, as a map, +the more prominent buildings--the Church, the Municipality, the old +Benedictine Monastery where Duke Alfred, they say, condescendingly +invited himself to dine with the monks every second month in such state +and splendour that, the rich convent revenues being exhausted, His +Highness was pleased to transfer his favours to the neighboring +Carthusians who went bankrupt in their turn; he recognized Count +Caloveglia's place and, at the furthest outskirts, the little villa Mon +Repos. + +Where was she now, his cousin? + +Reposing, no doubt, like all sensible folks. + +And his eye wandered to the narrow pathway along the precipice where he +had walked with her in the evening light--that pathway which he had +suggested railing in, by reason of its dangers. A section of the +horrible face of the cliff was exposed, showing that ominous +coloration, as though splotched with blood, which he had noticed from +the boat. The devil's rock! An appropriate name. "Where the young +English lord jump over...." + +It was the stillest hour of the day. Not a soul in sight. Not a +particle of shade. Not a breath of air. A cloudless sky of inky +blueness. + +To Mr. Heard's intense relief Denis had settled down, apparently for +ever. He lay on his stomach like a lizard, immovable. His head, +sheltered by a big hat, rested upon his jacket which he had rolled up +into a sort of cushion; one bare sunburnt arm was stretched to its full +length on the seared ground. What a child he was, to drag one up to a +place like this in the expectation of seeing something unearthly! Mr. +Heard was not quite satisfied about him. Perhaps he was only feigning. + +Time passed. Do what he would to keep awake, the bishop felt his +eyelids drooping--closing under the deluge of light. Once more there +approached him that spirit of malevolence brooding in the tense sunny +calm, that baleful emanation which seemed to drain away his powers of +will. It laid a weight upon him. He felt into an unquiet slumber. + +Presently he woke up and turned sharply to look at his companion. Denis +had not stirred an inch from his voluptuous pose. A queer boy. Was he +up to some mystification? + +The landscape all around was scarred and deserted. How silent a place +can be, he thought. An unhealthy hush. And what a heat! The lava +blocks--they seemed to smoulder and reel in the fiery glare. It was a +deathly world. It reminded him of those illustrations to Dante's +INFERNO. He thought to see the figures of the damned writhing amid +tongues of flame. + +His glance fell once more upon the villa of his cousin. Strange! There +were two persons, now, walking along the edge of the cliff. Mere +specks.... He took up his glasses. The specks resolved themselves +into the figures of Mrs. Meadows and Mr. Muhlen. + +The devil! he thought. What's the meaning of this? + +They were moving up and down, at the same spot where he had moved up +and down with her. They seemed to be on friendly terms with one +another. Excellent terms. It looked as if they were laughing now and +then, and stopping occasionally to glance at something, some book or +other object, which the lady carried in her hand. The devil! At times +his cousin seemed to be dangerously near the edge--he caught his breath, +remembering that sensation of giddiness, of gulping terror, with which +he had watched the falcon swaying crazily over the abyss. She was +enjoying it, to all appearances. Then, as they retraced their steps, it +was the man's turn to take the outside of the path. He suffered as +little as she did, evidently, from vertigo. Laughing, and +gesticulating. The devil! What were they talking about? What were they +doing there, at this impossible hour of the day? Five or six times they +went to and fro; and then, suddenly, something happened before Mr. +Heard's eyes--something unbelievable. + +He dropped his glasses, but quickly raised them again. There was no +doubt about it. Muhlen was no longer there. He had disappeared. Mrs. +Meadows was walking down towards her villa, in sprightly fashion, +alone. + +Mr. Heard felt sick. Not knowing exactly what he was about, he began to +shake Denis with needless violence. The young man turned round lazily, +flushed in the face. + +"Where--what--" he began. "Rather funny! You saw it too? Oh, Lord! +You've woke me up. What a bother.... Why, Mr. Heard, what's the +matter with you? Aren't you feeling well?" + +The bishop pulled himself together, savagely. + +"Touch of the sun, I daresay. Africa, you know! Perhaps we ought to be +going. Give me your arm, Denis, like a good boy. I want to get down." + +He was dazed in mind, and his steps faltered. But his brain was +sufficiently clear to realize that his was face to face with an +atrocious and carefully planned murder. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXXIV + + + + + +All the traditions of his race, the uprightness of ages of decent +law-abiding culture, the horror of the pure for what is impure rebelled +against this thing which nothing but the testimony of his own eyes +could have made him believe. He felt humiliated, as though he had +received a blow; inclined to slink about and hide his face from other +men. There was contamination in the mere fact of having been a witness. +Oh, it was villainous. How carefully the hour and place had been +chosen! + +And he himself, during that evening walk, had given her the idea. He +had said how easily a man could be thrown over at that spot. Very +simple.... + +His mind would clear up, maybe, in course of time. Meanwhile he +remembered about Retlow-ALIASMuhlen. It came to him in a flash. The man +was his cousin's first husband; possibly her only legal husband, seeing +that she may not have been able to secure sufficient evidence against +him to justify a divorce--had, indeed, lost sight of the scoundrel +altogether for several years prior to her elopement with young Meadows. +It might well be that Muhlen had heard somehow or other of her presence +on Nepenthe, and gone there for the purpose of renewing acquaintance +with her. But this foul crime! For it cannot have been a sudden impulse +on her part. She had been playing with him--leading him on. His visits +to the Old Town, at that quiet hour of the day.... No. She had +carried out her infamous plan after ample premeditation. + +Mr. Heard stayed at home, burdened with a hideous secret. Practical +questions began to assail him. What should he do? Wait! he concluded. +Something would be sure to turn up. He was too dazed to think clearly, +as yet. He also disliked that fellow. But one does not murder a man +because one happens to dislike him. One does not murder a man ... +foolish words, that kept on repeating themselves in his mind. + +To pardon--yes. Mr. Heard could pardon to any extent. The act of +pardoning: what did it imply? Nothing more than that poor deluded +mortals were ever in need of sympathy and guidance. Anybody could +pardon. To pardon was not enough for a man of Mr. Heard's ruthless +integrity. He must understand. How understand, how interpret, a +dastardly deed like this? What could her motives have been? Of what act +of proposal could the man have been guilty to merit, even in her eyes, +a fate such as this? For evidently, one does not murder a man because +one happens to dislike him-- + +Denis came to enquire, in the course of the morning. He was anxious to +know how the bishop was feeling after yesterday's attack of sunstroke. + +"I have been blaming myself bitterly for dragging you out," he began. +"I--really--" + +"Don't think about it! I shall be better soon. I'll remain indoors +to-day." + +"You are not looking quite yourself just yet. What a fool I was! I +can't tell you how sorry I am." + +"Not worth talking about. You'll stay to luncheon?" + +The news of Muhlen's disappearance was spread about that same evening, +and created no surprise whatever. Foreigners had a knack of coming to +the island and mysteriously vanishing again; it was quite the regular +thing to run up accounts all around and then clear out. Hotel-keepers, +aware of this idiosyncrasy on the part of distinguished guests, +arranged their scale of charges accordingly; they made the prices so +high that the honest paid for the dishonest, as with English tailors. +The other tradespeople of the place--the smiling confectioner, the +simple-minded bootmaker and good-natured stationer, the ever-polite +hosier--they all worked on the same principle. They recouped themselves +by fleecing the more ingenuous of their clients. + +In the case of Muhlen's occultation there was even less surprise than +usual. Everybody, judging by his lavish display of gold and showy +manner, expected him to depart sooner or later in the orthodox +manner--at night-time, by means of a sailing boat secretly hired, +conscientiously prepaid. His more intimate friends, the Magistrate and +the Commissioner, were less surprised than anyone else. True, Signore +Malipizzo was somewhat hurt, because Muhlen had practically invited him +to stay at his own native town where every kind of amusement was to be +had, the female society being of the choicest. Exuberant women--and +rich! It would have been a pleasant change after the trim but tedious +gardens of Salsomaggiore. He had strong homes, however, of receiving a +letter from some safe place outside the dominions, making an +appointment for the holidays. For form's sake, of course, he promptly +initiated the ordinary judicial enquiries. It would look well in the +records of the Court. + +As for Mr. Parker, who was brooding in the retirement of his villa +whither the news had swiftly spread, he merely thought: + +"Got off scot free. And without paying his Club account, I'll bet. +Bolted. Lucky devil. That's where the casual visitor has the pull over +a resident official like myself. Cleared out! I'm glad I never had any +money to lend him. Touched a good few of them, I'll be bound." + +Within an hour or so of the magistrate's formal enquiries led to a +startling discovery. Muhlen's room in the hotel was broken open, and +his property searched. No letters could be found conveying any clue as +to his whereabouts. But--what was almost incredible--there was loose +money lying about. A more minute investigation proved that the +gentleman had dressed himself with considerable care prior to leaving +the establishment for the last time. He had changed his socks and other +underwear--yes, he had donned a clean shirt. The old one, blue-striped, +which he had been seen to wear at breakfast, was lying negligently +across the back of a chair with a pair of costly enameled links, of +azure colour to match, in the cuffs. Moreover, in a small box hidden +beneath some collars in a drawer were found a few foreign bank-notes, a +ring or two, and a handful of gold coins such as he was in the habit of +carrying about his person. The judge, who superintended the researches, +caused these valuables to be impounded, sealed, and deposited in the +Court of Justice. + +The discovery put a fresh and ominous complexion on the affair. When a +man means to bolt, he does not leave portable jewelry--an enameled pair +of links--behind him. And even if, in the hurry and scurry of departure, +he does overlook such elegant trifles, he never forgets to take his +money; least of all a man like Muhlen. + +A lengthy deposition was signed by the hotel proprietor. It set forth, +in reference to Muhlen's general habits, that this gentleman had +hitherto not attended to his account; he had not been urgently pressed +for a settlement. One did not like to incommode foreign visitors with +bills; it annoyed them so much that they sometimes migrated to other +hotels and made debts there, debts which in certain unexpected cases +were liquidated in full while the former and equally legitimate ones +remained unpaid--which was disheartening. In regard to his recent mode +of life, the document contained the suggestive fact that Muhlen had not +taken his midday meal at the hotel for some time past. He was strangely +fond of going out in the late mornings, the proprietor averred; it +might be, to bathe; he returned at about five in the afternoon after +lunching, presumably, in some small restaurant by the shore. + +This declaration, signed by a respected citizen, soon leaked into +publicity. Taken in conjunction with the discovery of his money it was +an eye-opener to the whole community, and to nobody more than to the +judge himself. Signor Malipizzo argued, with his usual penetration, +that Muhlen had intended to return to his quarters as he had always +done of late. The ANIMUS REVERTENDI was abundantly proven by the +sleeve-links and loose cash. He had not returned. Ergo, something +untoward had happened. Untoward things may be divided, for the sake of +convenience, into two main classes, sections, or categories: + +1. Accidents. +2. Foul play. + +Which was it? + +Signor Malipizzo dismissed as untenable the hypothesis of a clandestine +withdrawal from local creditors. By way of clearing up the last vestige +of doubt, however, and also for the sake of appearances (seeing that a +wise magistrate is supposed to take nothing for granted) he called for +depositions for the sailors and fishermen. It was a superfluous piece +of work, a pure formality; he knew beforehand what they would say. They +always said the same thing. They said it. Interrogated on oath they +declared, one and all, that no person answering to the description of +Muhlen had appeared on the beach for a long time; not for the last +eight months and twelve days, to be quite accurate; much less had such +a one engaged a vessel. The jovial but conservative sea-folk never +varied their utterance on those many solemn occasions when a foreigner, +for the purpose of evaporating, paid in advance for the hire of a boat, +or was supposed to have done so. Albeit even ignorant people attached +no significance to this statement, it went for what it was worth as +cumulative evidence. + +The sight of that loose cash would have been quite enough for a man of +Signor Malipizzo's discernment. Muhlen had not bolted. Nor was he the +kind of man to lose his life by an accident. Not he! Muhlen was careful +of his skin. Ergo, his disappearance was due to something which came +under the second class, section, or category. He had been done away +with. + +The magistrate, thinking of those summer holidays, began to be really +vexed; so did Mr. Parker, who soon learned the result of these +enquiries and regretted that his mourning retirement prevented him from +issuing forth and telling everybody what he thought of this new +disgraceful scandal. His English blood revolted at the idea of a +harmless tourist, a prominent member of the Alpha and Omega Club, being +callously murdered. Would these people never get civilized? He was glad +to hear, at all events, that the judge was doing something. + +Signor Malipizzo was doing a good deal. He meant to sift the thing to +the bottom. His energy, hitherto simulated, was now set genuinely at +work to discover indications of the murderer--indications of his missing +friend. But Nepenthe is not a good place for finding corpses. The +island is full of fathomless rents and fissures. A good many +foreigners, especially such as were known to carry loose gold in their +pockets, had been suspected of falling into them without leaving a +trace behind. Yet a thorough search was instituted, for he knew that +criminals were not always as clever as they thought themselves; some +insignificant relic might turn up--a shred of clothing or so forth. Such +things were occasionally picked up on Nepenthe; nobody knew to whom +they belonged. The Cave of Mercury, on being searched, yielded nothing +but a trouser button, apparently of English manufacture. Enquiries were +also made as to when the ill-starred gentleman had last been seen, and +where. Finally, the judge drew up a list, a fairly long list, of all +the suspicious characters on the place with a view to placing them +under lock and key, in expectation of further developments. Such was +the customary procedure; one must assume the worst. If innocent, they +might of course regain their liberty in a year or two. + +It stands to reason that a good many people had noticed Muhlen on the +morning of his disappearance. One cannot walk about Nepenthe at that +hour of the day without being seen, and Muhlen was sufficiently +conspicuous. But everyone knew what was in store for him if he admitted +such a fact, to wit, an application of paragraph 43 of the 92nd section +of the Code of Criminal Procedure, according to which any and every +witness of this kind is liable to be segregated from his family and +kept under arrest for an indefinite length of time, pending the +instruction of a trial which might take half a century. Nobody, +therefore, was fool enough to admit having encountered him--nobody save +a half-witted youth who fatuously confided to a policeman that the had +met the gentleman somewhere in the neighbourhood of the bibliographer's +villa about the hour of midday. Under ordinary circumstances Signor +Malipizzo would have been delighted to lay sacrilegious hands on Mr. +Eames, whose Olympic aloofness had always annoyed him and against whom +a case could now be got up, on the strength of these indications. +Somewhere in the neighbourhood of the villa--that was quite sufficient +to warrant an arrest. + +The boy in question happened to be a relation of his arch-enemy, the +parish priest. Better still. Chuckling at the happy coincidence, he +forgot all about Mr. Eames, and gave orders for the other to be +conveyed to the guard-house, searched, and interrogated, arguing +plausibly that a person of his mental instability would be sure to give +himself away by some stupid remark. + +Things turned out better than he had dared to hope. Under the +prisoner's clothing was discovered a gold coin of foreign nationality +attached, by a piece of string, round his neck. For all one knew, it +might have been Muhlen's. The interrogating carbineer who is invested, +during such preliminary enquiries, with quasi-judicial functions--being +permitted to assume the role of prosecuting or defending counsel, or to +remain sternly unbiased, as he feels inclined--desired to learn how he +had come by this jewel. + +He received it long ago from his mother, he said, as a talisman against +the moonsickness which had tormented him in childhood. Replying, in +stammering and dazed fashion, to further questions, he gave it to be +understood that nobody had ever set eyes on the coin in question; he +was afraid of showing it, lest someone should take it from him by +force. He loved the coin. He got it from his mother. + +"Ah!" said the friendly policeman. "And your mother, now--could she +perhaps tell us when she gave it to you?" + +"My mother is in Paradise." + +"Dead, is she? H'm. That looks queer, my young friend. Very fishy. You +should be more careful in little things like that. She ought to have +been kept alive, you know. Anybody can say they had gold coins given +them by dead mothers, don't you see? Rather a thin trick. Can't you +suggest something better? Cheer up, boy! You needn't tremble all over. +Look, I am writing it down, and you must put your name to it +afterwards. Think--little. A living uncle, for instance--if he came into +Court and testified that he had given you the coin, why, it might make +all the difference and get you out of a nasty scrape. Surely you've got +an uncle or something? How about His Reverence the PARROCO? Couldn't he +swear--?" + +"My mother is in Paradise." + +"In Paradise, is she? That's where you ought to be, my son. Just sign +this declaration, please. Then perhaps you will meet your mother sooner +than you expect. Can't read or write? Well, put your cross to it and +may the Madonna help you! For I can't. I've done my best to be +impartial, but God alone can steer a fool. He makes a specialty of it, +they tell me. If so, you've got a sporting chance...." + +Overjoyed with this incriminating deposition, His Worship gave orders +for the prisoner's formal arrest. Aloud he remarked: + +"What have I always said? Beware of wimple folks. They are the deep +ones. Their naivete is nothing but a disguise. Here we have a case in +point. This boy, from all accounts, is the pure type of the callous +murderer. He stutters. He makes uncalled-for gurglings of a bestial +nature. He has pendulous ears, and certain other stigmata of +degeneration which are familiar to all conversant with criminal +anthropology. Of course he denies everything. But mark my words! After +six or seven months, when the prison diet begins to take effect, he +will confess. I know the species; it is all too common. Meanwhile we +must congratulate ourselves on having tracked down the culprit so +soon." + +To condemn for homicide the cousin of a Catholic priest warmed the +cockles of his free-thinking heart. In fact, on second thoughts, it was +better than if he had caught the real murderer who might have turned +out to be an atheist, which would have been bad enough--or possibly a +freemason, which would have been really awkward. The news spread +rapidly over the island, and caused wild rejoicings among the +anti-clericals. + +The rejoicings were of brief duration. + +Torquemada, as usual, was in fighting trim. Like all God-fearing +ascetics, he was a man-eater at heart. He made up his mind long ago to +eat the judge, whom he considered an offence to Heaven and earth--the +official mouthpiece of the devil. Up to the present he had bided his +time, waiting for a good opportunity. The time was now ripe. + +Not that he greatly loved his cousin. The family to which the unhappy +youth belonged was of no credit or use to himself, and this particular +member was worse than useless, being afflicted with an unpardonable +vice--lack of judgment. His stupidity had already got him into a number +of minor scrapes. As a child he annoyed foreigners by ingenuous +requests for money, stole flowers from neighbours' gardens because they +were so irresistibly pretty, tied saucepans to their cats because they +had such irresistibly long tails and made such irresistibly droll +movements and noises in order to get rid of them, frightened old ladies +by making faces at them; sometimes, by way of a change, he threw off a +fit; later on, he had taken to smashing crockery, mooning about the +vineyards, forgetting errands entrusted to him, throwing stones at +passing carriages and making a general nuisance of himself. The PARROCO +knew that he had been dismissed as incompetent by tradespeople to whom +he was apprenticed, by farmers who had employed him as a labourer. He +could not even repeat his Ave Maria without producing sinister +crepitations from his gullet. And now he had crowned all by this +surpassing act of imprudence. If he had only kept his mouth shut, like +everybody else. But there! What could you expect from a fool? + +A genuine murderer--it was most irreligious, of course. Still, some +homicides were fairly justifiable, others almost meritorious; and a +criminal of this kind showed, in every case, undeniable traces of +manliness; one could not help respecting him in an oblique sort of +fashion. But a fool! Torquemada, the zealous priest, the man of God, +could never quite repress the promptings of his blood. He had all the +fanatic's appreciation of violent methods; all the Southerner's +fondness for a miscreant, and contempt for a simpleton. A mere +fool--what's the use of him on earth? Had the culprit been any ordinary +Christian, His Reverence would not have dreamt of interfering; gladly +would he have let him spend the remainder of his day sin prison which +everybody knew to be the best place for stupid people--it kept them out +of mischief. + +But this was not an ordinary Christian. He was a relation. A relation! +That meant that one must show fight for him, if only for the sake of +public appearances. + +He held a hurried council with his family and, half an hour later, a +second one with the more influential members of the priesthood. It was +decided, in both cases, that the occasion was favourable for a +long-deferred contest between the Powers of Light and the powers of +darkness, the Catholic Church and modernism, the Clergy of Nepenthe and +the secular authority of law and order as personified by that judge in +whom all evil, public and private, flowed together. A noble parting +cheque which he had just received from Mr. van Koppen for some urgent +repairs to the parish organ came in handy. It would enable him to face +the adversary with good hopes of success. To his friends he said: + +"An insult to my family! I shall not take it lying down. Let them see +what a humble servant of God can do." + +So saying, he girded his loins for the fray, walked in person to the +post office and wrote out a lengthy telegram to the redoubtable Don +Giustino Morena, the parliamentary representative of Nepenthe who, as +readers of the newspapers were aware, happened to be taking a brief +holiday among his own people in the South. It was a judiciously +flattering dispatch. It prayed the famous lawyer-politician to +undertake the defence of a relation, an orphan, a mere child, unjustly +accused of murder and arbitrarily imprisoned, and to deign to accept a +pitiful honorarium of five thousand francs--the largest sum which a +parish priest, poor but jealous of the honour of his family, could +scrape together. If the great man accepted the offer, he might arrive +by the nest day's boat. There was a chance, thought the PARROCO, of his +doing so. Don Giustino was an ardent Catholic; he might be favourably +impressed by the modest petition of a clergyman in his constituency. He +had promised over and over again to visit his Nepenthean constituents. +He would now be killing two birds with one stone. + +Five minutes, under ordinary circumstances, were wont to elapse ere an +item of private news could percolate out of the post office and become +public property. Such was the portentous import of this message that it +did not percolate at all. It flashed, and produced forthwith a feeling +of joyous elation at the prospect of lively events in the near +future--of a battle between the Vatican and the Quirinal. Coming on the +top of Muhlen's murder--which was a decided improvement upon his alleged +flight--it caused the citizens to talk in excited and almost random +fashion about what was coming next. Alone, the members of the Alpha and +Omega Club, thanks to the benign influence of Parker's poison, received +the successive waves of information with composure, and preserved from +beginning to end their sense of proportion. + +"Heard the news? Muhlen's bolted." + +"I thought he would." + +"They say he owes a good deal." + +"Obviously. Else he wouldn't have bolted. Good riddance, anyhow." + +"That's what I say. But he owes me a lot of whiskies, the blighter." + +"You're lucky. Gone off with thirty francs of mine." + +"Damn his eyes. I expect we're not the only ones." + +"Not by a long chalk. Come and have a drink." + +"Heard the news? Muhlen's murdered." + +"Serve him bloody well right. The blackguard owes me two francs fifty. +I'll bet it was some money business." + +"Not a bit of it. A little girl, you know. Got a knife in the stomach. +About eleven at night, from all accounts. They heard him squealing a +mile off." + +"I don't believe it. He was not that kind." + +"Not that kind? What do you mean?" + +"Not that kind." + +"Not THAT kind? Really? Go on. You don't say so, by Jove! What makes +you think it?" + +"Think? I don't think. I happen to know. You pay for my peg and I'll +tell you all about it...." + +"Heard the news? Don Giustino's coming over." + +"The old assassin. What of it?" + +"Good business! One in the eye for Mali--what's his name. There'll be +the hell of a row. We ought to be grateful to Muhlen for this +amusement." + +"Damned if we ought. Unless he got himself killed on purpose to amuse +us. And even then it would have amused me more if he had paid me back +those seventeen francs." + +"You're very hard to please to-day." + +"So would you be, if you'd been as raddled as I was last night. You +ought to see the inside of my head, you ought. There's room for a coal +barge, in there." + +"That's easily remedied. Toss up for drinks." + +"Don't mind if I do...." + +Signor Malipizzo heard the news as he was sitting down to luncheon. At +first he thought the priest had gone crazy. Don Giustino--good God! Five +thousand francs. Where had he found the money? Then he remembered +hearing about old Koppen's cheque for the organ. Those confounded +foreigners, always mixing themselves up in local concerns! If the +PARROCO were really poor, as these hypocrites of Christians professed +to be, he could never have run to it. Don Giustino. What an awful turn +of events. And all because Muhlen got himself murdered. These +confounded foreigners! + +His heart sank within him. He had looked forward to keeping the +priest's cousin for a year or two in gaol, previous to his trial. That +would have to be altered. If Don Giustino came, the proceedings must be +fixed for next morning--it was the merest act of courtesy towards a man +of his standing, a man whom one must conciliate at any cost. He blamed +himself for arresting that young idiot. It threatened to bring him into +undesired prominence. Hitherto, by reason of his sheer insignificance, +he had escaped the great Catholic deputy's eye. As Magistrate of +Nepenthe, who cared what political or religious views he professed or +in what manner he administered the law? All this was now changed. He +was in the limelight. It might end--who knows where? He had other +enemies on the island beside the clericals; the arrival of Don Giustino +might lead to a general revision of his judicial labours. To-morrow +perhaps he would have to confront the monster. Don Giustino! He knew +him by reputation. A Camorrista of the blackest dye. He took no +chances. He never threatened; he performed. Everybody knew that. Signor +Malipizzo did not like the prospect of losing his lucrative job. Still +less did he fancy the notion of receiving a charge of buck-shot in his +liver, one evening from behind a wall. That was Don Giustino's cheerful +way with people who annoyed him. Those infernal clericals; their +sanguinary, out-of-date methods! Papacy and Camorra--interconvertible +terms--who could plumb their depths? The Masons were different. They +fought for the enlightenment of a people deluded by priestly snares and +intimidated by the threats of assassins. Don Giustino. Holy Mother of +God! What would to-morrow bring? + +Thinking thus, the judge eyed his victuals resentfully. His appetite +was gone--he was beginning to feel sick. Suddenly he pushed his plate +away from him and hobbled out of the room, even forgetting to finish +his wine. He limped across the broiling market-place to give the +necessary orders to his faithful and experienced clerk who, having +likewise got wind of that telegram, was not unprepared for some change +of mind on the part of his chief. + +"The young idiot must come up for trial to-morrow, if the assassin +arrives." + +"A sound suggestion," the grey-haired one replied. "It will take the +wind out of his sails. It will prove--" + +"Of course it will. And now, Don Carlo, go and take your little nap. I +will stay here, to put my papers in order. May your dreams be happy." + +The judge was dowered with extreme irascibility of temper, due to his +chronic valetudinarian condition. He, too--within the limits of +propriety--was not going to take things lying down. So much was certain. +At first he was too agitated to be able to collect his thoughts. +Gradually, as he moved about those rooms, calmness and confidence +returned. He was alone. It was very warm and quiet here, amid these +scenes of his many little triumphs. The look of the archives, the +familiar smell of the place, was reassuring. He began to feel at ease +once more. Ideas came to him. + +He signed warrants for the arrest of the Messiah, Krasnojabkin and some +fifteen others of those who had escaped his wrath on the previous +occasion. They would be under lock and key within two hours. Don +Giustino would never interfere on behalf of these aliens. Nor would any +one else. An inspiration! It would proclaim his zeal for the public +order--his official independence of mind. + +And--yes. There was one other little thing. + +He hobbled to where the various PIECES JUSTIFICATIVES were lying in +their sealed envelopes. He took up the receptacle containing the gold +talisman which had been sequestrated from the priest's nephew, and +broke it open. It could always be sealed up again. The coin, attached +to its string, fell out; it was an old-fashioned medal--Spanish, +apparently. He fingered it awhile. Then, opening the packet which held +Muhlen's gold, he carefully examined the contents. Five or six of these +coins were of the same kind. French Napoleons. That was lucky. Any +stick was good enough to beat a dog with. This was a particularly good +stick. He bored a hole through one of the Napoleons and placed it on +the culprit's string, after removing the original talisman, which he +bestowed in his own pocket. That done, he sealed up the two parcels +again, conscientiously. + +"There!" he said. "He laughs best who laughs last. Don Giustino is a +clever man. But the devil himself could not prove the prisoner +innocent, in the face of evidence like this. Down with the Pope!" + +Never had he felt so enlightened, so gloriously freemasonish. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXXV + + + + + +The commendatore Giustino Morena--familiarly known as Don Giustino or, +by his enemies, as "the assassin"--was a Southerner by birth, a city +product. From low surroundings he had risen to be a prominent member of +the Chamber of Deputies and one of the most impressive figures in the +country. + +As a child he was apprenticed to a cobbler. There, bending over his +work on the pavement outside the shop-door, his blue eyes and curly +fair hair, his rosy cheeks, his winning smile, his precocious retorts, +attracted the most favourable comment from the passers-by and secured +him an unfailing supply of chocolates and cigarettes. People liked him +so much that he quickly learned not only how to mend shoes but a good +many other things which they were anxious to teach him. His grown-up +friends vied with one another for a place in his affections and a +certain scandalous affair with knives, which somehow or other got into +the daily press where it had no business to be, put the seal on his +reputation in the quarter. + +"That boy will go far!" the old men and women used to say. "Only look +at his blue eyes. Blessed the mother that bore him, whoever she +was"--for nobody even pretended to know. + +They were right; as old folks are apt to be. The victor in the +disreputable affray happened to be a gentleman of middle age, a +distinguished ornament of the Black Hand. No happier fate could have +been devised for Giustino than to live under the patronage of such an +individual. He took charge of the little fellow, and was not slow in +discovering that his protege possessed not only a muscular framework +and ready wit, but the malice, the concentrated ruthlessness and +rapacity of fifty devils rolled into one. Something could be made out +of that boy, he concluded; the Society, always ready to adopt promising +neophytes on the recommendation of a qualified practitioner like +himself, would doubtless enrol him in due course. Meanwhile he +instructed him, by precept and example, how to be religious in the +manner most pleasing to the Madonna. He narrated the Lives of the +Saints, forced him to attend Mass and confess himself to one of the +Society's trusted priests and taught him, above all things, to hate the +Government because it oppressed the Pope and the poor. One day he said: + +"You must now attend evening classes. I think you will do well at our +school of the Holy Cross. Your outfit is exceptional. Among other +things you have the great advantage that the first and second fingers +of both your hands are of equal length. That augurs well! God has +favoured you, for many lads have to lengthen the first one +artificially, which is apt to weaken the joints." + +The Master and Director drew good salaries from the numerous pupils at +this institution. Everything useful to young boys was taught here save +only religion. Seeing that all the scholars were drawn from families +distinguished for their piety and adherence to the Pope, the Director +considered a religious training to be superfluous--his pupils learnt +these things on their mothers' knees. Giustino soon acquired the +jargon; he passed his examination in fifteen articles, in secrecy, +swiftness of foot and nimbleness of hand. The latter was taught on a +clothed wooden figure out of whose pockets the students were obliged to +extract handkerchiefs, gold watches and jewelry with such dexterity +that not one of the little bells, which dangled from its hat, gave +forth the slightest sound; that stage passed, the art was practised on +the person of the Director himself who, walking through the streets as +an ordinary citizen, was supposed to have his pockets picked in the +approved professional manner. Those who failed to come up to the +standard were thrashed savagely three or four times; if they still +failed, they were sent back to their parents with a polite +recommendation that they should be taught some other trade. Giustino +was seldom punished. On the contrary, the Director was so enamoured of +his progress and blue eyes that he entered him as a fox long before the +regular three years' course was up, and offered to tattoo the symbol of +proficiency, a cross, on the back of his right hand. + +The patron, while proud of his young friend, did not intend to spoil +his chances in after life by an indelible bodily mark of this kind +however honourably attained. He had other designs for him. To pass the +next year or two, he made arrangements for Giustino, now grown lean and +wolfish, to be officially received into the Black Hand. As probationer +he was the delight of his superiors; he went through the various tests +with phenomenal rapidity and gave abundant proofs of manliness. At the +age of sixteen he had already killed three men--one of them being a +policeman who was suspected of infidelity towards the Society. It was +then that the protector, who was no fool, spoke to him a second time, +saying: + +"As you know, my son, I can neither read nor write. Those were not +considered respectable accomplishments, in my day, for a lad of spirit +or a man of honour. Devil's work! But we live in an effeminate age. +Virtue is at a discount. The wise man, while observing these things +with regret, adapts himself to them. He marches with the times. They +call us reactionaries. It depends upon boys like you to show the world +what reactionaries are good for. The whole town has already learnt to +respect your manly instincts. You must now go further and learn to read +and write. You will then enter the University. There you will study law +and politics. You will then enter Parliament. There you will represent +our cause. The means--the money? Trust the Society! Only be a credit to +your friends, defend the poor, and never forget to say your prayers. +Then the good God will reward your efforts." + +This is precisely what the good God did. Within a short space of time +the young deputy had made a name for himself; he was recognized as one +of the few representatives of the Black Hand whose word could be +implicitly relied upon. He had a share in everything; commissions and +percentages poured in upon him. After making an example of half a dozen +tiresome persons by having them quietly stabbed or shot--nothing was +ever proved against him though everybody knew it was his work--he +experienced no further opposition in his political career. Morena never +threatens, they say; he performs. A safe man! From a timorous Liberal +Government, his avowed enemies, he extorted the title of Commendatore; +not because he attached any value to such outward distinctions but +because, like a true Camorrista, he never lost an opportunity of +showing that he could do what he pleased with everybody, Government +included. It was an open secret that the next vacant portfolio of +Justice would be at his disposal. All this of course was years and +years ago. + +To these arts of statecraft he added a quite unusual legal acumen and +forensic ability. For the last fifteen years he had been in receipt of +large annual retaining fees from the principal commercial firms of the +country; that of one shipping company alone amounted to fifty thousand +francs. They found it worth their while since, without doing a stroke +of work for them, he gave his tacit support to their most nefarious +undertakings. A useful man! As a lawyer in private cases his reputation +was tremendous. Judges and juries had been known to faint with emotion +at his dramatic gestures, his fiery eloquence. He could pull anybody +out of a scrape. Wherever he spoke the Court was crowded to listen to +his impassioned arguments, to look upon the cold fire of his blue eyes, +his carefully adjusted dress, his fair hair turning to grey, his smooth +face which he kept shaven for no other reason--so he used to +declare--than because he reverenced the fashions of the old papal +regime. "Just like an Englishman," people said. + +He had lately put on flesh; it inspired confidence. Moreover, he never +married; that also was something out of the common--it pointed to +independence, to lack of ordinary human frailties. In short, he was so +perfect a compound of vice and intelligence that even his dearest +friends could not put their finger on the exact spot where the one +began and the other ended. And the whole of this unique mixture was +placed at the disposal of the Vatican. Don Giustino was the implacable +enemy of modernism, a living disproof of the vulgar assertion that +freemasonry is the sole key to success in modern Italy. A formidable +man! And growing more formidable every day, as his wealth increased. +His income was already such that he could afford to be honest; nothing +but the force of old habits kept him from developing into a positive +saint. + +It stands to reason that a person of this caliber would have sniffed at +a paltry remuneration of five thousand francs offered by an obscure +country priest. But Don Giustino was a good son of the Church. He had +never forgotten the recommendation of his old patron to succour the +humble and distressed; he specialized, as a lawyer, in defending +murderers and rescuing them from the secular arm. They were enthusiasts +suffering under a sense of wrong; they belonged to the class of the +honest poor; they were victims of governmental greed and social +injustice. Motives, not deeds! he would say. And the motives of the +poor must be judged by other standards than those of the rich. They +have other lives, other temptations. Trust the people. The people, +under proper guidance of the priests.... + +Although it was hardly likely that the great man would deign to accept +Torquemada's invitation, yet half the town was assembled at the harbour +to await the arrival of the evening boat and catch a glimpse, if +possible, of the famous Camorrista. And there he was! He leaned over +the taffrail, easily recognizable from his pictures in the illustrated +papers. He was dressed in a felt hat, brown boots, and light grey +clothes--just like anybody else. Presently he descended to the quay, +followed by a tall and solid-looking young valet. He was wreathed in +smiles. A whiff of political life, of busy deeds in the capital, +exhaled from his person. The Mayor of Nepenthe, a devout Catholic, +deferentially shook hands and introduced the PARROCO and other +notabilities. They drove up together. It was all delightfully breezy +and informal. But men were aware that in this little episode there +lurked more than met the eye; that the arrival of Commendatore Morena +was an occasion worthy to be chronicled in the annals of the island. +Not only was it his first appearance as a deputy among his +constituents. That alone would have been an event. The avowed purpose +of his visit, to rescue a criminal from the properly constituted +authorities, gave it the character of a pro-Vatican demonstration--a +slap in the face of King and Constitution. + +An intimate little dinner had been arranged by the parish priest in +order to give the principal clergy and a few favoured laymen of their +party an opportunity of paying their respects. No one knew what took +place at this repast save that the distinguished guest was in wonderful +humour; he joked and laughed and told funny stories; he was enchanted +with the wine and the excellent local crayfish and announced his +intention of buying a little villa wherein to spend the evening of his +days, after his public labours were over. An ideal spot! Lucky people, +he called them. It was most unfortunate that he would be obliged to +leave by to-morrow's midday boat, and so miss the greater part of the +festival of Saint Eulalia. + +Another little item of news was allowed to filter out and sedulously +propagated, to the effect that the Commendatore had refused, politely +but firmly, to accept any remuneration for his services. Such a thing +could not be thought of! Pleasure and duty rarely coincided as in this +case, where it was both a pleasure to come to this charming island and +a duty to say a few words in Court about this unfortunate young man--to +defend the oppressed to the utmost of his miserable ability, and +thereby approve himself a good son of the Church. + +"Your servant in everything!" he added. "And if you would now accept +from me a humble donation of one thousand francs to be distributed, as +His Reverence thinks best, among the needy poor of Nepenthe, you would +indeed make me your debtor for life!" + +Such was the great man's speech, as reported. It was a pure invention +on the part of Torquemada who, being a high-principled ecclesiastic, +had clear-cut orthodox views anent the utility of pious legends. He +knew it would sound well among the populace. He hoped it would vex the +envious magistrate into a fit of colic. He argued that the great man +himself, in the event of its coming to his ears, would not be otherwise +than gratified by a godly fable so strictly in keeping with his +character. + +Don Francesco alone, the smiling terrestrial beast, the lover of wine +and women, held aloof from the entertainment, alleging a gastric +indisposition and doctor's orders. He did not see eye to eye with +Torquemada on matters such as these. Don Francesco disliked all +measures of violence, Camorra or freemasonry, Vatican or +Quirinal--disliked them so much that he would have hated them had he +been built, like the PARROCO, on hating lines. He was too unwieldy, too +fond of life, too indulgent towards himself and others to experience at +mention of Don Giustino's name anything but a certain feeling of +discomfort--a feeling which his acute intelligence, embedded under those +rolls of fat, enabled him to formulate with warmth and precision. + +"I know quite well," he said to Torquemada, "that he calls himself a +good son of the Church. So much the worse for the Church. I understand +he is a prominent member of the Government. So much the worse for the +Government. And I realize that, but for his intervention, this harmless +individual might spend the remainder of his life in prison. So much the +worse for all of us, who derive justice from so tainted a source. As to +dining at the same table with him--no. Does not the whole world know his +history? The animal! He would make me vomit. And you will believe me +when I say, my dear PARROCO, that I do not look my best on such +occasions." + +Torquemada shook his head, mournfully. It was by no means the first +time that he had suspected his popular colleague of being a lukewarm +Christian. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXXVI + + + + + +The market-place was filled to over-brimming. Everybody discussed the +near events in the Court of Justice. It promised to be a bad day for +Signor Malipizzo. And yet people could not help admitting how clever he +had been to lock up those Russians. It was the best thing he could have +done under the circumstances. It proved his freedom from anti-Catholic +prejudices. It made him look icily objective. + +Torquemada, on hearing that the prisoner's gold coin corresponded with +those others which had been in the possession of the murdered man, +thought it deplorable. Here was plain evidence of his cousin's guilt! +Most deplorable. Still, the victim being not only a foreigner but a +Protestant was a considerable mitigation of the offence from the moral +and religious point of view, and possibly from the legal one as well. +Anyhow, what did legal aspects matter? Had he not engaged Don Giustino? +Innocent or guilty, the prisoner would be released. And, on second +thoughts, he discovered him to be worthy of the great man's golden +eloquence. He was not altogether a fool. There was a touch of manliness +about him; he was decidedly a brighter lad than he looked. He deserved +to be released. + +Ten o'clock sounded. + +The Court had never been so crowded. There was barely standing room. +Sunlight poured in through the windows which had not been cleaned for +many long months; the atmosphere was already rather oppressive. It was +a stuffy place at all times, reeking of old tobacco smoke and humanity. + +Everybody was still save the old grey-headed clerk who fussed about +with papers. Signor Malipizzo, after a deferential but dignified bow to +the famous lawyer, had taken his seat on the raised platform facing the +public whence he was wont to dispense justice. Nailed against the wall, +directly over his head, was a large white paper bearing the printed +words "La Legge": the law. It dominated the chamber. On one side of +this could be seen a coloured portrait of the Sovereign in the +bersagliere uniform; a fierce military glance shot out of his eyes from +under that helmet whose plume of nodding feathers made it look three +sizes too large for his head. On the other side hung a representation +of the Madonna, simpering benignly in a blue tea-gown besprinkled with +pearls and golden lace. The spittoon, which His Worship required +continually during the audiences, was wont to be placed immediately +below this latter picture; it was the magistrate's polite freemasonish +method of expressing his reverence for the Mother of God. Everybody +noticed that on the present occasion this piece of furniture was +located elsewhere. It stood below the Sovereign's portrait. A delicate +compliment to the formidable lawyer-champion of Catholicism, sworn +enemy to the House of Savoy. People commented favourably on this little +detail. How artful of him! they said. + +All eyes were fixed upon Don Giustino. He sat there quietly. If he was +bored he certainly did not show it. Now that he was here he would give +these good people a taste of his quality. He knew all about the gold +coin; he was profoundly convinced of the prisoner's guilt. This was +lucky for the young man. Had he thought otherwise he would probably +have refused to take up the case. Don Giustino made a point of never +defending innocent people. They were idiots who entangled themselves in +the meshes of the law; they fully deserved their fate. Really to have +murdered Muhlen was the one and only point in the prisoner's favour. It +made him worthy of his rhetorical efforts. All his clients were guilty, +and all of them got off scot free. "I never defend people I can't +respect," he used to say. + +He began his speech in a rambling, desultory sort of fashion and quite +a low tone of voice, as if he were addressing a circle of friends. + +A charming place, Nepenthe! He would carry away the pleasantest +memories of its beauty and the kindliness of its inhabitants. It was +like a terrestrial paradise, so verdant, so remote from all danger. And +yet nothing on earth was secure. That volcanic eruption the other +day--what a scare it must have given them! What a lucky escape they had, +thanks to the Divine intervention of the Patron Saint! Hardly any +damage done; no victims worth mentioning. The fertile fields were +intact; mothers and fathers and children could once more go out to +their daily tasks and return in the evening, tired but happy, to gather +round the family board. Family life, the sacred hearth! It was the +pride, the strength, the mainstay of the country; it was the source +whence the rising generation drew their earliest notions of piety and +right conduct. Nothing in the world could replace home influence, the +parents' teaching and example--nothing! And this poor boy, now +threatened with imprisonment, had a mother. He had a mother. Did the +Court appreciate the import of those words? Did they realize what it +meant to shatter that hallowed bond, to deprive the parent of her +offspring's help and consolation--the child of its mother's fostering +care? Let them consider the lives of all t hose great men of the past +who were known to have had mothers--Themistocles, Dante, Virgil, Peter +the Hermit and Madame de Maintenon--why had they achieved distinction in +the world? What was the secret of their greatness? A mother's +affectionate guidance in youth. They had not been torn, as children, +from her loving arms. + +A good many people were already sobbing. But the orator had noticed +that something was wrong. He consulted a small scrap of paper and then +continued in the same conversational tones as before. + +He had no mother. He was an orphan. An orphan! Did the Court realize +what it meant? No, he dared not ask them to picture to themselves all +that was implied in that bitter word. An orphan. Nobody to instil those +early lessons of piety ... to grow up wild, neglected, despised.... +It was impossible for a man to avoid going astray in such terribly +unnatural conditions. Everybody else had parents to counsel and direct +them; he alone was bereft of this blessing. It was cruel, it was +illogical, to apply the same standard to him as to those fortunate +other ones. Let the Court call to mind the names of those who had +deviated from the narrow path of duty; did they not all belong to this +unhappy class? It might safely be inferred that they had no mothers! +Such person were to be pitied and helped, rather than condemned for +what was the fault not of their natures but of their anomalous +situation in life. To rescue a motherless young soul from the brink of +perdition was the noblest task of a Christian. And this was still, +thank Heaven, a Christian country, despite the ever-swelling invasion +of that irreligious foreign element which threatened to break up the +old faith in God. The Madonna was still worshipped; together with the +Saints. Their precious relics and other holy amulets still proved their +efficacy in the hour of danger. + +Amulets--ah, that reminded him. + +To kill a man with a view to possessing yourself of his substance was +an unpardonable crime. Now what had this boy done? Let them take the +so-called robbery first. Well, no robbery had been committed, in spite +of the notorious fact that this Protestant, this foreigner was known to +be loaded with money. His client had fought down the temptation, the +almost irresistible temptation, of appropriating the gold. Let them +remember that! The minutest investigation failed to reveal anything +save a single coin which he had attached to a string and hung about his +neck. Motives, not deeds! What were his motives for this strange act? +An unconscious application of the homoeopathic principle. He had taken +it as a safeguard, an amulet, in the childish belief that it might +protect him on future occasions against insults such as those he had +undergone. + +Then, while the audience were still puzzling what the last words meant, +he suddenly indulged in one of those abrupt transitions for which he +was famous, and burst out: + +"Down with foreigners! We Catholics know what foreigners are, how they +work for evil in places high and low. One cannot take up a daily paper +without seeing some exposure of their many-sided viciousness. They +contaminate the land with their godless depravity. Nobody can count on +immunity. The highest officials in the land, the very Ministers of the +Crown, are subjected to their vile disguised attempts at bribery and +corruption, no humble peasant girl, no child, is safe from the +befoulment of their filthy minds. We know them--our police records, the +archives of our Courts of Justice, testify to their demoralizing +agency. A pest, a contagion! Who can tell what proposals were made in +this particular case--what degrading proposals, backed by the insidious +offer of foreign gold? A weak character might have succumbed. But the +victim was made of different stuff. He belonged to another type--the +heroic type. Suffering anguish of soul, he yet preferred honour to +baseness. In self-defence--" + +At this point the great Deputy ceased to speak. Signor Malipizzo had +swooned away. He had to be carried out of Court. + +It mattered little, for the proceedings were at an end save for a few +formalities. The case was won. + +People were rather annoyed at being deprived of one of Don Giustino's +far-famed perorations. It could not be helped. Better luck next time. +Then they asked themselves why the judge had fainted. Some thought it +might be the heat, or a touch of his old complaint. The majority were +agreed that the attack was due to the Deputy's eloquence. And it was +true that he was greatly impressed by the speech, but not quite as much +as all that. He had decided to faint at a critical moment, for the sake +of appearances. It was clever of him. He did it beautifully too; he had +been rehearsing half the night. Don Giustino, on his part, shared the +common opinion and was charmed with this tribute to his genius. +Altogether, the local judge had made a favourable impression on him; +his attitude had been irreproachably correct. He was not a bat fellow, +for a freemason. One might do worse than leave him in possession of his +present appointment on Nepenthe. + +The Deputy freed his prisoner; it was unavoidable. But the Russians +remained in gaol, and this was always something to the credit of Signor +Malipizzo.... + +Madame Steynlin, on hearing of Peter the Great's arrest, was stricken +dumb. She wept the bitterest tears of all her life. Then, with +returning calmness, she remembered Mr. Keith whose friendship with the +magistrate was the common talk of the place. Would he be able to do +anything? Impulsive by nature, she called on that gentleman and poured +out her griefs to him. Mr. Keith was sympathetic. He declared he +understood perfectly. He promised to do his utmost, that very day. + +The Master, meanwhile, languished in prison. He had nobody to take his +part, not even among the Little White Cows; the new section, that +clique of young extremists, were only too delighted to have him out of +the way. The communal doctor alone interceded on his behalf, imploring +the judge in the name of the sacred brotherhood of freemasons that he, +the Messiah, should be excarcerated in order that he, the physician, +might be enabled to continue the daily treatment to which the old man +had grown accustomed and for which he was being regularly remunerated. +"Think of my wife and children!" he said to the magistrate. + +Signor Malipizzo on this occasion did not mean to be baulked of his +prey. He was in bad humour; Don Giustino had got on his nerves. By +means of a lightning-like discharge of symbols intelligible only to the +Elect he retorted that a physician, who depended for his livelihood +upon a legitimate practice among BONA FIDE patients, was not fit to be +a freemason. + +Then the doctor urged the humanitarian aspects of the case. The old man +needed the treatment which could be given in prison just as well; the +fees would doubtless be paid sooner or later. + +The magistrate proved inexorable, adamantine. What was good enough for +a native, he argued, was good enough for a vicious old alien. A +stomach-pump in prison! What more? They would be wanting fried fish and +asparagus next. + +As a special concession to the Master's age and rank a separate upper +chamber, described as very airy, had been allotted to him in the local +gaol. The poor old man did not know how he got there; they had thrust +him into this strange place and locked the door on him. Long hours had +passed. He sat on an uncomfortable cane-bottomed chair, his hands +folded across his stomach. There was already a slight sense of +oppression in that region of his body. His head, too, felt heavy. +Without knowing how or why, he had fallen into a trap, after the manner +of some dumb beast of earth. When would they take him out again? And +when would that kind gentleman with the machine arrive? + +Daylight entered through a small but thickly grated window. Looking out +from where he sat, he could detect neither men nor houses nor +trees--nothing but four rectangular patches of deep blue. The sea! Often +had he wondered about the sea, and why it was there. It had ever been +an enigma to him, this purposeless mass of water. Not even good to +drink. He knew nothing of those fables of the pagans--of old Poseidon +and white-armed Leucothea and the blithe crew of Triton and +silver-footed Thetis moving upon the placid sunlit waters; nothing of +that fair sea-born goddess whose beauty swayed the hearts of men. His +Venus ideals had been of a more terrestrial nature--the wives or +daughters of army generals and state functionaries who desired +advancement, and sometimes got it. + +Not even good to drink! There was nothing like this in Holy Russia. God +would never have allowed it. The uselessness of this sea had always +been to him a source of perplexity and even vague apprehension. The +spectacle of this shining immensity troubled his world-scheme. Why did +God create water, when land would have been so much more useful? Often +had he puzzled on the subject.... Why? + +But now, in the evening of his life and the extremity of his anguish, +the truth was made manifest. A Revelation drew nigh. It just came to +him. + +The fishes. + +It was a dying gleam of intelligence, his last inspired thought, his +swan-song. How else could the fishes live save in the water? All these +long years he had remained ignorant of the truth. Ah, if only his +disciples were at hand, to jot it down into that GOLDEN BOOK! + +But why--why must the fishes live in water? And why so much water for so +few fishes? Why cannot fishes live on land? Then everybody would be +satisfied. Inscrutable are the ways of God.... + +And his glazed eye moved wearily from that disquieting expanse of blue +along the wall of his chamber which had once been white and was now +scrawled over with obscene jests and drawings, product of the leisure +hours of generations of prisoners. The writing, like all writing, was +unintelligible to him. But some of the artistic efforts left little to +the imagination. He was saddened, less by homely pictures than by the +unfamiliar script. He had always distrusted the written word. Why all +these strange letterings--so unnecessary, so dangerous to the life of an +orthodox Christian? What one brother has to tell another--why write it +down? + +He saw the straw pallet destined for his nocturnal repose. It reminded +him dimly of a similar resting-place during his monastic life. Then, +too, he had slept on a couch near the floor. Flickering visions came to +him of those days, so long ago, ere yet the First Revelation was given +to the world. A breath of old Russia was wafted into his nostrils. He +remembered the lusty, jovial country folk, the songs and dances at +hay-making, the fragrance of the land, the sluggish rivers rolling +their brown mud about the plains, the mild long-drawn evenings. He felt +again that all-pervading charm of sadness, of tender yearning, that +hangs in the pale Russian sky and penetrates to the very soul of the +endless country. + +Gloomy autumn days--wet leaves and lowering horizons. The long winter +within doors. Faces appeared to him, faces of old, an endless +procession of faces clear-cut as ever ... his brother monks, bearded +and unkempt ... debauched acolytes ... pilgrims from the Holy Land +... glittering festal robes ... vodka orgies, endless chants and +litanies, holy lamps burning, somber eikons with staring eyes ... the +smell of greasy lukewarm cabbage soup, of unwashed bodies and boot +leather and incense. Holy Russia--it all moved before his eyes in a kind +of melodious twilight. Then the First Revelation. The Man-God. + +Man-God. The word filtered through his intelligence. How strange it +sounded. The Man-God--what could it mean. + +A sudden change. A life of glory and intrigue. Food on platters of +gold, sparkling wines and laughter. A diamond cross, an imperial gift, +the reward of faithful services. Everybody cringing. Showers of bribes. +Women--always women. A divine life! Nothing but women.... + +Darkness. Something had happened; they had carried him into a place +full of endless penances, floggings, starvings. Then they accused him +of doing wrong. What was it? The flesh of warm-blooded beasts.... He +had preferred the service of God to that of his earthly master. For +this they banished him and made him suffer. He was dying now--dying to +save mankind. He was giving up his life for sinners. Someone else had +once done the same thing. Who was it? He could not remember. People who +read and write--they know these things. Some saint, possibly; or at +least a man from another province--someone he had never met or spoken +to. A good Russian, whoever it was. But the name--the name had slipped +out of his mind. He always had a good memory for faces, but a bad one +for names. + +He was so ill and oppressed too. Worse than before. He felt himself +rotting earthwards, like a fungus of his own native forests under +autumn rains. His body remained inert but his eye, roaming away from +the straw pallet, fixed itself upon the door. When, when would that +kindly gentleman with the instrument arrive? + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXXVII + + + + + +Concerning the life and death of Saint Eulalia, patroness of Nepenthean +sailors, we possess ample and accurate information. + +She was born in 1712 at a remote village in the Spanish province of +Estramadura. Various divine portents accompanied her birth. Her mother +dreamed a strange dream about a sea-serpent; her father was cured of a +painful gouty affection; the image of Saint James of Compostella in the +local church was observed to smile benignly at the very hour of her +entry into the world. At the age of two years and eleven months she +took the vow of chastity. Much difficulty was experienced in keeping +the infant alive; she tormented her body in so merciless a fashion. She +refused to partake of food save once in every five weeks; she remained +immovable "like a statue" for months on end; she wore under her rough +clothing iron spikes which were found, after death, to have entered +deeply into her flesh. She was never known to use a drop of water for +purposes of ablution or to change her underwear more than once a year, +and then only at the order of her confessor who was obliged to be in +daily contact with her. The heat of her body was such that it could not +be touched by human hands. During her frequent trances she spoke +accurately in sixty-nine different languages; there was no hair +whatever on her head which was "spotless as an egg." She put baskets of +sea urchins into her bed and, as a penance for what she called "her +many sins," forced herself to catch the legions of vermin that infested +her brown blanket, count them, separate the males from the females, set +them free once more, and begin over again. She died at the age of +fourteen years and two months. Her corpse forthwith became roseate in +colour, exhaled a delicious odour of violets for twenty weeks, and +performed countless miracles. On dissection, a portrait of Saint James +of Compostella was discovered embedded in her liver. + +Saint Eulalia appeared too late to find her proper niche in Monsignor +Perrelli's ANTIQUITIES or to be commemorated in some worthy +architectural monument by the Good Duke Alfred; too late--and this is +doubtless a lucky circumstance--to become the victim of one of Father +Capocchio's offensive sneers. Whoever is interested in her saintly +career may purchase at Nepenthe, for the small sum of sixpence, an +admirable biography by a young Canon of the Church, Don Giacinto +Mellino. It gives a full account of her life and of those nine hundred +and seventy-two miracles of hers which have been authenticated by +eye-witnesses. No need, therefore, to expatiate further. + +It stands to reason that Mr. Eames possessed a copy of this treatise. +An ideal annotator, he rarely indulged in speculation; his business was +to discover and co-ordinate references. Nevertheless, in regard to the +earthly life of this particular saint, he used to say: "There are some +things a man cannot help puzzling about." It irked him--her success on +Nepenthe. He knew the sailormen to be a horny-handed, skeptical, +worldly brood. Why had they imported the cult of Eulalia from Spain; +why had they chosen for their patroness a mawkish suffering nonentity, +so different from those sunny goddesses of classical days? He +concluded, lamely, that there was an element of the child in every +Southerner; that men, refusing to believe what is improbable, reserve +their credulity for what is utterly impossible; in brief, that the +prosaic sea-folk of Nepenthe were like everybody else in possessing a +grain of stupidity in their composition--"which does not bring us much +further," he would add.... + +At the time of this year's festival Mr. Eames was supremely happy. +Another pamphlet had come into his hands, an anonymous pamphlet making +fun of the Duchess whose reception into the Roman Church had been fixed +for the day of Saint Eulalia's festival. It bore the objectionable +title THE DIPPING OF THE DUCHESS and had presumably been indited by +some wag at the Alpha and Omega Club who disapproved of water in every +shape, even for baptismal purposes. The stuff was printed on the sly +and hastily circulated about the island--some people maintained that Mr. +Richards, the respectable Vice-President of that institution, was its +author. It was a scurrilous anti-Catholic leaflet, grossly personal and +savouring of atheism. The Duchess, on hearing of it--everything got +about on Nepenthe--was so distressed that she decided to cancel, or at +least postpone, the ceremony of her public conversion. At a meeting of +urgency convened by the priests, who were bitterly disappointed at her +attitude, it was agreed that this was no time for half-measures. A +round sum of money was voted wherewith to buy back the pernicious +pamphlet from its respective owners with a view to its destruction. + +In the space of a single day every copy vanished from the island--every +copy save one, which had found its way into Mr. Eames' collection. He +meant to keep that copy. He would have died sooner than yield it up. +When the clerical deputation arrived at his villa with soft words and +promises of more solid lucre, he professed the uttermost amazement at +their quest. Mr. Eames, the soul of honesty, the scorner of all +subterfuge and crooked dealing, put on a new character. He lied like a +trooper. He lied better than a trooper; that is to say, not only +forcefully but convincingly. He lied as only a lover of bibliographical +curios can lie, in defence of his treasure. He thanked them for their +courteous visit and bade them keep their gold. He professed himself a +poor recluse innocent of the world's ways and undesirous of riches, +adding, as a mere afterthought, that he had not so much as heard of the +noxious broadsheet in question. There must be some mistake. Society +people might know something about it; that gentleman who called himself +a bishop for example, that sallow gentleman from Africa, who spent so +much of his time in social gaieties--he might very likely have received +a copy. If they wished, he would gladly make enquiries, discreet +enquiries, about the matter. + +It was Mr. Eames' second lapse from grace. Gentlemen do not tell +falsehoods. He did not want to be a gentleman just then. He wanted that +pamphlet. + +The reverend visitors withdrew convinced, amid showers of compliments +and apologies. After seeing them safely off the premises and even, for +greater security, half-way down the hill, Mr. Eames returned, drew out +the jewel from where it lay in a secret hiding-place among others of +its kind, and hugged it to his heart. He purposed to reproduce the +pamphlet IN EXTENSO, in that particular appendix to his edition of +Perrelli's ANTIQUITIES which dealt with "Contemporary Social History." +... + +Mr. Heard knew nothing of all this as, jostled among the crowd, he +watched the procession on that bright morning. It reminded him of the +feast of Saint Dodekanus which he had witnessed twelve days earlier; it +was even more extravagant. But he now felt himself seasoned to this +kind of display. Besides, he had seen funnier things in Africa; though +not much funnier. Once more his thoughts went back to those laughing +black people, he remembered all of them--the Wabitembes, the M'tezo, the +Kizibubi--what a set of jovial ruffians! How they would have enjoyed +this sunshiny nonsense. And the Bulangas. Really, those Bulangas-- + +There was a light touch on his shoulder. He turned, and found himself +face to face with Mrs. Meadows. She was smiling and looking ever so +happy. + +"Well, Tommy!" she said. "You don't seem to be very pleased to see me. +Why haven't you come to tea lately? And why are you looking so glum? +He's got his leave, after all. I had a cable two days ago. He'll pick +me up here in a fortnight or three weeks. Aren't you glad you needn't +escort me to England?" + +"Awfully glad!" he replied, trying to be jocular. The words stuck in +his throat. He had expected to meet--if he met her at all--a skulking +contrite criminal. This woman was jubilant. An amazing, terrifying +state of affairs. + +"There is something the matter with you, Tommy. Perhaps you have caught +my headache. You remember how inquisitive you were? And how you +complained of the roses? If you come up now you will find fresh ones +waiting for you." + +Her glance was unclouded. No human being ever looked less +conscience-stricken. It was as though she had convinced herself of the +righteousness of her deed, and thereafter dismissed it from her mind as +something not worth bothering about. Blithe as a bird! If he had not +seen with his own eyes-- + +"Has it gone, your headache?" he enquired, not knowing what to say. + +"Gone away altogether. I have heard so much about this procession that +I thought I would drive down and have a look at it. I missed the last +one, you know. Besides, I wanted to see some friends here whom I've +been neglecting lately. I feel quite guilty about it," she added. + +He couldn't help saying: + +"You don't look guilty." + +"Ah, but you mustn't judge by appearances!" + +"You blamed the sirocco, I remember." + +"I don't blame it any longer. Surely a woman can change her mind? But +what is the matter with you?" + +"Perhaps the south wind," he ventured. + +She remarked laughingly: + +"I don't believe the wind is in the south at all. But you always were a +funny boy, Tommy. If you are very good you will see some pretty +fireworks presently. As for myself, I shall have to drive home for +Baby's early dinner." + +"Fireworks in broad daylight?" he asked. "That is something new." + +"In broad daylight! Aren't they queer people? They can't wait till it +gets dark, I suppose." + +At that moment they were joined by Keith and three or four others. He +had no more chance of speaking to her alone; she drove away, not long +afterwards, waving her parasol at him and leaving him in a state of +dazed perplexity. + +He had been thinking night and day about his cousin, certain of her +criminality and profoundly convinced of her moral rectitude. What had +Muhlen done? He had probably threatened her with some exposure. He was +her legal husband--he could make himself abominable to her and to +Meadows. The future of the child, too, was imperiled. He might be able +to claim it; or if not that--the bishop's notions of bastardy laws were +not very clear--he could certainly rely upon his friend the magistrate +to take the child out of the mother's custody or do something horrible +of that kind. The happiness of that whole family was at his mercy. She +had been goaded to desperation. Mr. Heard began to understand. To +understand--that was not enough. Anybody could understand. + +Keith took his arm and remarked: + +"Come and see my cannas! They are prefect just now. I must tell you a +story about them--it's the wildest romance. I am the only person in +Europe who understands the proper cultivation of cannas. I shall have +scented ones soon." + +"Don't they smell?" enquired the bishop absent-mindedly. + +"Not yet. You are looking a little tired, Heard, as if you had not +slept well lately. Perhaps you would like to sit down? We can watch the +fireworks from the terrace. You ought to read Pepys' DIARY. That is +what I have been doing. I am also rather low-spirited just now. The end +of another spring, you know--it always makes me feel sad. Pepys is the +antidote. He is a tonic. Every Englishman ought to be compelled, for +the good of his soul, to go through Pepys once in three years." + +"I must read him again," said the bishop who was not particularly +interested in the diarist just then. + +"His universal zest! It seems to be extinct nowadays; it is a charm +that I have not discovered in any living Englishman. What a healthy +outlook! Not a trace of straining anywhere. He took life with both +hands. How he threw himself into his work, his amusements, his clothes +and women and politics and food and theatres and pictures. Warm heart, +cool head. So childlike, and yet so wise. There's only one thing that +troubles me about him--his love of music. It was so obviously sincere. +He not only liked it; he actually understood it. Music, to me, is a +succession of sounds more or less painful. I can't even whistle. It's +too bad." + +The bishop said: + +"If the lives of all of us were written down with the same remorseless +candour, how few would stand the test." + +He was thinking of the Devil's Rock. + +"I don't trouble about tests," replied Keith. "The whole herd of +humanity adapts its pace to that of the weakest lamb. The capacity of +the weakest lamb--that is the test. I don't consider myself bound to +such a vulgar standard. And how spectacular we are, in matters of +so-called right and wrong. That is because we have painfully cultivated +the social conscience. Posing, and playing to the gallery! Mankind is +curiously melodramatic, my dear fellow; full of affected reverence for +its droll little institutions. As if anybody really cared what another +person does! As if everybody were not chuckling inwardly all the time!" + +"Surely there are heights and depths in the matter of conduct?" + +"I don't trouble about heights and depths. Does it not all depend upon +where we take up our stand? Must we always remain stationary like +vegetables? A bird knows nothing of heights and depths. You sit here at +night-time and look at the stars. They are firm-fixed, you say. Well, +they are not firm-fixed. Therefore it is the wrong way to look at them. +I have also written a diary, Heard. It is my legacy to posterity and +will be published after my death. It relates of actions not all of +which Count Caloveglia would call pretty. Perhaps it will give some +people the courage of their unspoken convictions." + +The bishop suddenly asked: + +"If somebody you knew had committed a crime, what would you say? +Somebody you really respect--a person like Mrs. Meadows?" + +"Your cousin? I should say that whatever Mrs. Meadows does is well done." + +"You would approve?" + +"Of course I would. People like that are bound to be in the right." + +"Really ...?" + +The fireworks were splendid; altogether, Saint Eulalia's day proved a +tremendous success. The festal joy was only marred by the unseemly +behaviour of Miss Wilberforce, who profited by the occasion to let off +some fireworks, or at least steam, of her own. + +In broad daylight too. + +This was something new, and rather ominous. + +The dear lady was becoming quite a problem. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXXVIII + + + + + +Men looked down from the market-place that afternoon and beheld a +gaily-coloured throng moving about Madame Steynlin's awkwardly situated +promontory. Her house and its wide terrace overhanging the sea were +filled with guests. The entertainment differed from the receptions of +the Duchess. It was more rustic and unrestrained--more in the nature of +a picnic. Everything possible had been done to convert that tongue of +land, that refractory stretch of trachyte, into a garden. Paths were +blasted through the rock; those few scarred olives, the aboriginals, +had been supplanted by whatever flowers and shade-giving trees could be +induced, with assiduous waterings, to strike roots into the arid soil. +It was still rather a transparent place. + +A number of new people had lately arrived on Nepenthe in favour of whom +the hostess, with the frank cordiality of her nature, had issued +invitations broadcast. There was the celebrated R. A. and his dowdy +wife; a group of American politicians who were supposed to be reporting +on economic questions and spent the Government's money in carousing +about Europe; Madame Albert, the lady doctor from Lyons whose unique +combination of magic and massage (a family secret) had brought the +expiring Prince of Philippopolis to life again; an Italian senator with +his two pretty daughters; a bluff hilarious Scotchman, Mr. Jameson, +who, as a matter of fact, had done seven years for forgery but did not +like to have it brought up against him; some sisters of charity; a +grizzled sea-captain who was making discreet enquiries about a safe +place for a shipwreck, having been promised by the owners twenty per +cent of his vessel's insurance money; a dilapidated Viscount and his +SOI-DISTANT niece; two fluffy Danish ladies who always travelled +together and smiled at everything, though the younger one smiled in +such a horrible knowing fashion that you could not help disliking her; +Mrs. Roger Rumbold who addressed meetings to advocate Infanticide for +the Masses; Mr. Bernard of the Entomological Society-author of THE +COURTSHIP OF COCKROACHES; another young man of pleasant exterior who +was held to be an architect because his brother used to be employed in +a well-known engineering firm, and several more. + +The exclusive Mr. Eames was absent. He sat at home, thinking how +narrowly he had escaped imprisonment at the hands of Signor Malipizzo, +in connection with Muhlen's disappearance. The closest shave of all his +life! It showed how right Keith had been in bidding him keep on the +right side of the law--on the right side of the judge--rather than trust +to the promptings of a "good conscience." The Duchess likewise sent her +excuses. She was so troubled about the pamphlet that Don Francesco +hardly dared to leave her side. He, therefore, was also absent; so was +the bereaved Commissioner. Mrs. Meadows had driven home again long ago. +Van Koppen intended to sail in the early hours of next morning. The +bishop and Denis were likewise on the verge of departure. A break-up +was at hand. + +Mr. Keith alone refused to budge. He was waiting for the first cicada +whose strident call was due, he declared, in a week's time. Till then +he proposed to remain on Nepenthe. + +"Fancy waiting for an insect," said his friend van Koppen. "I believe, +Keith, you've got a sentimental streak somewhere." + +"I have been fighting against it all my life. A man ought to dominate +his reflexes. But if the insect keeps good time--why not?" + +He was in an elegiac mood, though he meant to drive away his cares +later in the evening by the "Falernian system." He felt the exodus in +the air. Another spring drawing to its close--everybody scattering! He +was filled, too, with that peculiar pensiveness which troubles complex +people when they have done a kindly act. Virtue had gone out of him. + +He had wrought a miracle. + +The moist look in the eye of his hostess testified to the miracle; so +did her frock which, being of pink muslin, harmonized with the state of +her mind but not with her complexion. Peter the Great had escaped from +prison. Not only he, but all the others were at liberty once more, +including the Messiah who, after some attentions on the part of the +communal doctor, had been put to bed like a little child. The rest of +them filled her trim walks with their gleeful laughter and bright +raiment; they devoured abundant wines and food at those refreshment +tables which groaned under the weight of good things. One could trust +Madame Steynlin to attend to the commissariat department. She knew how +to gladden the human heart. That of Peter the Great was gladdened to +such an extent that he soon began to perform a Russian peasant dance, A +PAS SEUL, to the delight of the assembled guests. It was a cheery +interlude with a disastrous ending, for the rough terrace being +different from what he expected, he stumbled and fell full length upon +the ground. There he lay, laughing, like a young giant refreshed with +wine. + +"I don't know how you have done it, Mr. Keith," she said, "and I am not +going to ask. But I shall never forget this kindness of yours." + +"Would you not do the same for me? I imagine, between ourselves, that +the judge has been a good deal flustered with this trial and the +intervention of Don Giustino. Perhaps he lost his head. We are all +liable to that, are we not? He is a nervous man; but quite a good +fellow if one keeps on the right side of him. It is so easy to keep on +the right side of people. I often wonder, Madame Steynlin, why men are +so full of bitterness towards each other. It is one of the things I +shall never live to understand. And another is this problem of music! +Will you help me to grasp the pleasure which you seem to derive from +it? Helmholtz does not bring me much further. He explains why certain +sounds are necessarily disagreeable--" + +"Oh, Mr. Keith! You would go to a professor. I fear you are not very +musical. Have you never felt inclined to cry?" + +"I have. But not in a concert-room." + +"Nor yet in a theatre?" + +"Never," he replied, "though it saddens me a little to see grown-up men +and women stalking about in funny dressing-gowns and pretending to be +kings and queens. When I watch HAMLET or OTHELLO, I say to myself: +'This stuff is nicely riveted together. But, in the first place, the +story is not true. And secondly, it is no affair of mine. Why cry about +it?'" + +"That looks as if you were heartless and unimaginative. And you so +compassionate! I do not understand you. I do not understand myself +either. We are always groping about in the dark, are we not? We are +always puzzling about our own problems instead of helping other people +with theirs. Perhaps one should not think so much of oneself, though it +is an interesting subject. Tell me, if music says nothing to you, why +not leave it alone?" + +"Because I want to be able to extract pleasure from it, as you do. That +is what makes me curious. I like to understand things, because then I +can begin to enjoy them. I think knowledge should intensify our +pleasures. That is its aim and object, so far as I am concerned. What +are other joys--those of the illiterate and incurious? A dog scratching +his fleas in the sunshine. They too are not wholly to be despised--" + +"What a dreadful simile!" + +"A precise one." + +"You like to be precise?" + +"It is my mother's fault. She brought me up so carefully." + +"I think that is a pity, Mr. Keith. If I had children I would let them +run wild. People are too tame nowadays. That is why so few of them have +any charm. These poor Russians--no one tries to understand them. Why is +everybody so much alike? Because we never follow our feelings. And yet, +what is a surer guide than the heart? We seem to live in a world of +echoes." + +"A world of masks, Madame Steynlin. It is the only theatre worth +looking at...." + +The lady was too happy to consider how the miracle had been wrought, +though she suspected dirty work at the bottom of it. She never +discovered how simple had been the method of Mr. Keith who had merely +given His Worship to understand that he had done enough bribing for one +season and that, unless Krasnojabkin were promptly released, there +would be no bribing whatever next year. The judge, with his usual legal +acumen, perceived the cogency of his friend's argument. He met Mr. +Keith's wishes more than half-way. On an impulse of downright +good-nature--there was no other interpretation to be put on it--he +released all the Russians, including the Messiah. They were +excarcerated then and there on a decree of "provisional liberty," which +looked well in the records of the Court and, being interpreted, +signified immunity from further judicial molestation. The incident was +closed. + +People talked about it none the less. They discussed Don Giustino, his +past career and present prosperity. As for Mr. Muhlen--he was already +almost forgotten. So was the Commissioner's lady. Madame Steynlin alone +brought herself to say a few kind words about both of them. She was +ready to say kind things about anyone. The magic of love! Her heart, +under the influence of Peter, had opened so wide as to embrace not only +the Russian colony, but even the nine thousand families of Chinese +cultivators who, according to a paragraph in the morning's newspaper, +had perished in a sudden inundation of the Hoang-Ho. + +The poor people! she said. She did not see why one should not +sympathize with the griefs of a Chinaman. Humble honest folks, without +a doubt--swept off the face of the earth, through no fault of their own, +by a cataclysm! There was quite a discussion about it on her terrace +that afternoon. + +Mr. Heard, feeling also very charitable, found himself taking her part +against someone who said it was impossible to sympathize with the +troubles of a yellow man--they were too different, too remote from +ourselves. He thought that much individual hardship had been suffered, +undeserved, unchronicled; homes destroyed, children drowned before the +eyes of their parents. And nobody seemed to care. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XXXIX + + + + + +Later on, he turned his back upon the crowded walks and found himself +on a remote terrace overlooking the sea. It was quiet here, in view of +the sunset--his last sunset on Nepenthe. + +Leaning over the parapet he enjoyed, once more, the strangely intimate +companionship of the sea. He glanced down into the water whose uneven +floor was diapered with long weedy patches, fragments of fallen rock, +and brighter patches of sand; he inhaled the pungent odour of sea-wrack +and listened to the breathings of the waves. They lapped softly against +the rounded boulders which strewed the shore like a flock of nodding +Behemoths. He remembered his visits at daybreak to the beach--those +unspoken confidences with the sunlit element to whose friendly caresses +he had abandoned his body. How calm it was, too, in this evening light. +Near at hand, somewhere, lay a sounding cave; it sang a melody of moist +content. Shadows lengthened; fishing boats, moving outward for their +night-work, steered darkly across the luminous river at his feet. Those +jewel-like morning tints of blue and green had faded from the water; +the southern cliff-scenery, projections of it, caught a fiery glare. +Bastions of flame.... + +The air seemed to have become unusually cool and bracing. + +Here, on a bench all by himself, sat Count Caloveglia. As the bishop +took a seat beside him they exchanged a few words. The Italian, so +affable as a rule, was rather preoccupied and disinclined for talk. + +Mr. Heard remembered his first encounter with that old man--the Salt of +the South, as Keith had called him. It was at those theatricals in the +Municipality. Then too the Count had been remarkably silent, his chin +reposing in his hand, absorbed in the spectacle--in the passionate grace +of the young players. He was absorbed in another spectacle now--the old +sun, moving in passionless splendour down the sky. + +Only a fortnight ago, that first meeting. Less than a fortnight. Twelve +days. How much had been crammed into them! + +A kind of merry nightmare. Things happened. There was something bright +and diabolical in the tone of the place, something kaleidoscopic--a +frolicsome perversity. Purifying, at the same time. It swept away the +cobwebs. It gave you a measure, a standard, whereby to compute earthly +affairs. Another landmark passed; another milestone on the road to +enlightenment. That period of doubt was over. His values had righted +themselves. He had carved out new and sound ones; a workable, +up-to-date theory of life. He was in fine trim. His liver--he forgot +that he ever had one. Nepenthe had done him good all round. And he knew +exactly what he wanted. A return to the Church, for example, was out of +the question. His sympathies had outgrown the ideals of that +establishment; a wave of pantheistic benevolence had drowned its smug +little teachings. The Church of England! What was it still good for? A +stepping-stone, possibly towards something more respectable and humane; +a warning to all concerned of the folly of idolizing dead men and their +delusions. The Church? Ghosts! + +His thoughts wandered to England. Often had he sighed, in Africa, for +its drowsy verdant opulence--those willow-fringed streamlets and grazing +cattle, the smell of hay, the flowery lanes, the rooks cawing among +slumberous elms; often had he thought of that village on the hill-top +with its grey steeple. Well, he would see them all in a few days. And +how would England compare with the tingling realism of Nepenthe? Rather +parochial, rather dun; grey-in-grey; subdued light above--crepuscular +emotions on earth. Everything fireproof, seaworthy. Kindly thoughts +expressed in safe unvarying formulas. A guileless people! Ships tossing +at sea; minds firmly anchored to the commonplace. Abundance for the +body; diet for the spirit. The monotony of a nation intent upon +respecting laws and customs. Horror of the tangent, the extreme, the +unconventional. God save the King. + +So much the better. This soulful cult of tradition, this clinging to +the obvious and genteel as it were an anchor of safety--it nipped in the +bud the monster-making faculty of low horizons and bleak, wintry +stretches of earth. Bazhakuloff! Those Russians, it struck him, had +been providentially sent to Nepenthe for his delectation and +instruction. He was glad to have beheld a type of this nature, +inconceivable in England. That grotesque, with three million followers! +It had been a liberal education to look into his vacuous face, into +those filmy eyes dripping with saintliness and alcohol. The Little +White Cows! Chimaeras, engendered in hyperborean mists. + +And still Count Caloveglia said nothing. He gazed at the sun, whose orb +now rolled upon the rim of the horizon. Slowly it sank, fusing the +water into a golden pool. A hush fell upon nature. Colours fled from +earth into the sky. They scattered among the clouds. The enchantment +began, overhead. + +At last the old man remarked: + +"I suppose that is why I am no colourist. That is why I worship the +inexorable rigour of form. We of the South, Mr. Heard, are drenched in +volatile beauty.... And yet one never wearies of these things! It is +what you call a glamour, an interlude of witchcraft. Nature is +a-tremble with the miraculous. She beckons us to explore her strange +places. She says: Tread here, my friend--and here; tread where you have +never trodden before! The sage surrenders his intelligence, and grows +young again. He recaptures the spirit of his boyish dreams. He peers +into worlds unknown. See! Adventure and discovery are lurking on every +side. These painted clouds with their floating banners and citadels, +yonder mysterious headlands that creep into the landscape at this hour, +those islets emerging, like flakes of bronze, out of the +sunset-glow--all the wonder of the ODYSSEY is there!" + +He spoke out of politeness and soon fell silent again. His thoughts +roamed far away. + +They were thoughts commensurate with the grandeur of the scene. + +Count Caloveglia was no colourist. He was a sculptor, about to reap the +reward of his labours. The cheque would be in his pocket that night. +Three hundred and fifty thousand francs--or nearly. That is what made +him not exactly grave, but reserved. Excess of joy, like all other +excesses, is not meet to be displayed before men. All excess is +unseemly. Nothing overmuch. Measure in everything. + +Measure even in the fabrication of Hellenic masterpieces. He had +created one of them (the Demeter did not count); it sufficed for his +modest ambitions. The Faun was his first forgery and his last. To +retrieve the fortunes of his family he had employed those peculiar +talents which God had given him. He would remain, henceforward, an +artist. He shrank from the idea of becoming a wholesale manufacturer of +antiques. + +Three hundred and fifty thousand francs. If sufficed. Thinking of those +figures, he began to smile with contentment. He smiled--but no more. And +as he continued to muse upon the transaction his look melted, +imperceptibly, into one of reverential awe; there was a solemnity about +that sum, an amplitude, a perfection of outline that reminded him, in a +way, of the proportions of some wonderful old Doric temple. The labour +of a lifetime would not have enabled him to collect so much had he +tried to sell bronzes of his own workmanship. A bust or statue by Count +Caloveglia--it would command a certain small price, no doubt; but what +was the reputation, the market value, of the most eminent modern artist +as compared with that nameless but consummate craftsman of Locri? + +The Count saw things in their true perspective. His mental attitude +towards Sir Herbert Street and his American employer was not tinged +with the faintest cloud of disrespect; for van Koppen, indeed, he +cherished a liking which bordered on affection. He detected in the +astute American what nobody else could detect--an element of childlike +freshness and simplicity. As far apart, in externals, as two distant +trees whose leaves are fluttering on either side of some tangled +forest, he yet felt that their roots were interwoven below ground, +drawing common life and nourishment and sympathies from that old +teeming soil of human aspirations. Nor was he vainglorious of his +achievement. His superiority over the art-expert he took as a gift of +the gods. Vanityi was abhorrent to his nature. He was not proud but +glad--glad to have been able to reconquer his legitimate social +position; glad, above all things, to have forged a link with the past--a +key to admit him into the fellowship of Lysippus and those others whose +august shades, he opined, were even them smiling upon him. The Locri +Faun was his handiwork. He was "entitled to dine well," as he had told +Denis. That was what he now purposed to do. One master-stroke had +repaired his fortunes. It sufficed. Nothing overmuch. Count Caloveglia +knew the story of Polycrates, the too-fortunate man. He knew what lies +in wait for the presumptuous mortal whoo oversteps the boundary of what +is fair and good. Nemesis! + +Three hundred and fifty thousand francs. There would be an ample dowry +for Matilda. And, as regards himself, he could return to his passion of +youth; he could afford to become a sculptor again and even, if so +disposed, a collector--though not exactly after the style of his +excellent friend Cornelius van Koppen. + +"That was a suggestive encounter, was it not, between the Deputy and +our local judge?" + +He spoke, as before, out of civility. + +"Very suggestive," assented Mr. Heard. "Two blackguards, I call them." + +The bishop was particularly glad to learn, as everybody on the island +had learnt, the minutest details of this sordid legal affair. It seemed +likewise to have been providentially arranged, in order to afford him +an insight into the administration of local law, and some notion of +what would have been in store for his cousin had she applied for relief +from Muhlen's persecutions to Signor Malipizzo, his intimate friend. +There would have been no justice for her--not from that quarter. He +would probably have forbidden the child to be moved out of his +jurisdiction, pending the progress of a trial which might never end. +Nor could the English Court, with its obsolete provisions on this head, +have regarded Muhlen otherwise than as her legal husband--the child of +her later union as illegitimate. Bastardy: a taint for life! How well +she had done to put herself beyond a rancorous letter of the law; to +protect her child and family according to the immutable instincts of +mankind! + +The Nepenthe magistrate had shown what he was capable of, in his +bestial dealings with a half-witted lad and those harmless Russian +lunatics--the first one saved through the intervention of a cut-throat +politician, and the second ... well, he did not exactly know how the +Muscovites had been able to regain their freedom but, remembering what +Keith had told him about Miss Wilberforce, her periodical imprisonments +and his periodical bribes, he shrewdly suspected some underhand +practices on the part of that gentleman at the instigation, very +possibly, of the charming Madame Steynlin. Signor Malipizzo's cruel +travesty of justice--how unfavourably it compared with his cousin's +altogether satisfactory, straightforward and businesslike handling of +Muhlen's little affair! + +Doubtless she suffered intensely. He called to mind her looks, her +voice, during that first interview at the villa Mon Repos; he thought +it likely that, but for her child and husband, she would have taken her +own life in order to escape from this villain. And doubtless she had +weighed the matter in her own mind. Sensible people do not take steps +of this gravity without reflecting on the possible consequences. She +must have tried her hardest to talk Muhlen over, before coming to the +conclusion that thee was nothing to be done with the fellow. She knew +him; she knew her own mind. She knew better than anyone else what was +in store for her if Muhlen got the upper hand. Her home broken up; her +child a bastard; herself and Meadows--social outcasts; all their three +lives ruined. Mrs. Meadows, plainly, did not relish such a prospect. +She did not see why her existence should be wrecked because a scoundrel +happened to be supported by a disreputable paragraph of the Code. +Muhlen was a troublesome insect. He must be brushed aside. Ridiculous +to call such a thing a tragedy! + +He thought of the insignificance of a human life. Thousands of decent +upright folks swept away at a blow.... Who cared? One dirty +blackmailer more or less: what on earth did it matter to anybody? + +An enigma? His cousin was not an enigma at all. Keith had called her a +tiger mother. That was correct. Not every parent could do what she had +done. Not every parent could do what she had done. Not every parent was +placed under the necessity. Not every parent had the grit. If all of +them fought for their offspring after this fashion, the race would be +stronger and better. Thinking thus, he not only understood. He +approved. Mrs. Meadows had saved her family. She was perfect of her +kind. + +Suddenly he remembered that other parent on the passenger boat when he +came to Nepenthe--that ugly peasant-woman dressed in black, with the +scar across her cheek--how she had tried to console her suffering child. +What had Muhlen said? "Throw it into the water! It's often the only way +of ridding oneself of a nuisance." Into the water. His own words. That +was where he, the nuisance, had gone. It was unpleasant, maybe, to +hurtle through eight hundred feet of air. But men who specialize in +making themselves objectionable after Muhlen's peculiar fashion deserve +all they can get. Sensible women do not put up with such nonsense, if +they can help it. + +One owes something to one's self, N'EST-CE PAS? + +Decidedly so. + +Everything was as clear as daylight. And he found he had bothered +himself long enough about Muhlen; there were so many other interesting +things on earth. A contemptible little episode! He decided to relegate +it into the category of unimportant events. He was glad that the whole +affair had remained in the background, so to speak, of his Nepenthean +experiences. It seemed appropriate. Odd, all the same, that the most +respectable woman on the island should be a murderess. + +"Dear me!" he mused. "How very queer. It never struck me in the light +before. Shows how careful one must be.... And a relation of mine +into the bargain. H'm. Some people, if they knew, would call it a +compromising situation. Well, I begin to think it rather creditable +than otherwise to our family. We want more women of this kind on earth. +All mothers ought to be tiger mothers...." + +"Don't you notice, Count, that there is an unwonted sparkle in the air +this evening? Something cleansing, clarifying?" + +"To be sure I do," replied the other. "And I can tell you the cause of +it. Sirocco is over for the present. The wind has shifted to the north. +It brightens all nature. It makes one see things in their true +perspective, doesn't it?" + +"That is exactly what I feel," said Mr. Heard. + + + + + + +CHAPTER XL + + + + + +The symposium, that evening, might have degenerated into something like +an orgy but for the masterful intervention of Denis who was not going +to let Keith make a fool of himself. It took place in the most famous +of all the caves of Nepenthe-Luisella's grotto-cavern dedicated, by +common usage, to the worship of Venus and Bacchus. + +There were two or three living rooms on the surface of the ground. +Walking through the first of these you clambered down some slippery +stairs into what was once a breathless subterranean vault hewn out of +the soft and dry pumiceous rock and used, as was customary, for storing +barrels and other paraphernalia. In the course of time, as more barrels +accumulated, the grotto was excavated further and further into the +entrails of the island. There seemed no reason why it should ever cease +growing when suddenly, one day, the perspiring workmen were struck in +the face by a cool blast of wind laden with marine moisture. They knew +what this meant. They had encountered one of those mysterious and +dangerous fissures that lead down to unknown depths, opening upon the +world of sunshine often at the water's edge, four hundred feet below. +It was deemed prudent to suspend excavations. These rents in the +interior of the earth had a knack of enlarging themselves, without a +word of warning, from cracks of a few inches to black gulfs several +hundred feet across. The cavern ceased to grow. As a matter of fact, it +turned out to be just large enough. + +That current of air ventilating the grotto made the fortune of these +orphan girls--Luisella and her three sisters. The barrels and other +lumber once removed, the recess became a breezy night-tavern, its +natural vaulting being first whitewashed and then adorned, by +master-hand, with thrilling pictures of crimson fish afloat upon +caerulean waves, and piles of bossy pumpkins, and birds of Paradise with +streaming golden feathers, and goats at pasture among blue lilies, and +horses prancing over emerald mountains, and trees laden with flowers +and fruits such as no mortal had ever seen or tasted. It was an ideal +place for a carousal. + +They could cook, those girls. Their savoury stews and vegetable soups +and FRITTURAS of every description were known far and wide. It was +universally agreed that nobody could make a more appetizing mayonnaise +sauce for cold fish and lobsters. No mayonnaise was quite like theirs; +no, not quite. Its flavour lingered on the palate; it haunted your +memory in distant lands, like the after-glow of some happy love-affair. +Nice girls, too; well-mannered; not very difficult to caress, and never +jealous of each other. "It's all in the family," they used to declare. + +"Am I right, then, or am I wrong?" asked Mr. Keith, whose pomposity was +melting away under successive bottles of his own wine, specially +imported to grace the table. + +The honest Vice-President of the Club, Mr. Richards, was pretty far +gone, but could always be relied upon to say something opposite. That +was due to his legal training. Once a thriving solicitor, he had been +struck off the rolls in consequence of some stupid trustee business +which turned out all wrong and thereafter driven along devious paths +known only to himself: hence his residence on Nepenthe. He replied: + +"That depends entirely, my dear Sir, upon what you postulated." + +"The older I get," observed Mr. van Koppen, "the more I realize that +everything depends upon what a man postulates. The rest is plain +sailing." + +"I never heard a truer remark," said Keith, "not even from you! One has +only to posit a thing, and it's done. Don't you agree, Bishop? Here is +what I would call a worn-out earthenware plate. It is not a plate +unless I tell it to be a plate. You may call it anything you like--it +can't answer back. But we need not pursue the argument. Speaking for +myself, I am feeling as comfortable as a beetle in a rose." + +The Vice-President remarked: + +"We all know what it means when Mr. Keith becomes horticultural in his +similes. It means the same thing as when I become legal. Gentlemen! I +propose to grow legal within the next half-hour or so." + +"You promised to tell me the history of your cannas," said Mr. Heard. + +"You were going to tell it me too," answered Denis. + +"I did. I was. And I will. But let me ask you this: have you ever heard +of a teetotaler conspicuous for kindliness of heart, or intellectually +distinguished in any walk of life? I should be glad to know his name. A +sorry crew! Not because they drink water, but because the state of mind +which makes them dread alcohol is unpropitious to the hatching of any +generous idea. WHEN MEN HAVE WELL DRUNK. I like that phrase. WHEN MEN +HAVE WELL DRUNK. I am inclined to think that the Aramaic text has not +been tampered with at this point. What do you say, Heard?" + +"Nothing is more improbable," replied the bishop. "And the water, you +perceive, was changed into wine; not into cocoa or lemonade. That +conveys, if I am not mistaken, rather a suggestive implication." + +"I have been pursuing Seneca's letters. He was a cocoa-drinker, +masquerading as an ancient. An objectionable hypocrite! I wish people +would read Seneca instead of talking about him." + +Van Koppen observed: + +"What a man postulates is truer than what exists. I have grown grey in +trying to make my fellow-creatures understand that realities are less +convincing than make-believe." + +"Given the proper atmosphere," said the bishop, laughing, "everything +becomes inevitable. If you were wrong, Mr. van Koppen, where would our +poets and novelists be?" + +"Where are they?" queried the American. + +"How shall that come out of a man," continued Mr. Heard, "which was +never in him? How shall he generate a harmonious atmosphere if he be +disharmonious himself? It is all a question of plausibility, of +verisimi--simili--" + +"I never heard a more profound remark, Koppen, no, nor a more subtle +one; not even from you. Nor yet from you, Heard. And I can tell you +something to the point. I was talking this afternoon with a gentleman +about the stage. I said it made me said to see flesh-and-blood people +pretending to be kings and queens. Because it cannot be done. No +sensible person can bring himself to believe it. But when you watch +some of these local marionette theatres the illusion is complete. Why +is a poppy show more convincing than the COMEDIE FRANCAISE? Because it +is still further removed from reality. There is so much make-belief +that you cease to struggle. You succumb without an effort. You are +quite disposed, you are positively anxious, to make concessions to the +improbable. Once they are made--why, as you say, it is plain sailing." + +"All life is a concession to the improbable," observed the bishop +rather vaguely. + +Mr. Richards remarked: + +"These questions must be approached with an open mind. An open mind, +gentlemen, is not necessarily an empty one." + +"A fine distinction!" + +"Very well. Mr. Keith proposes to abolish theatres. I second the +motion. Nothing is easier. Let me draw up a memorial to the House of +Lords. We will appeal to them on moral grounds. I know the proper +language. WHEREAS BY THE GRACE OF GOD YOUR PETITIONERS HUMBLY PROTEST +THAT THERE IS TOO MUCH KISSING ON THE STAGE--ah! Talking of kissing, +here comes our friend Don Francesco. He shall put his name to the +memorial and seal it with an oath. No Englishman can resist a +Monsignor. And nothing like a solemn oath. People always think you mean +it." + +That amiable personage strode down the stairs in dignified fashion, +greeting the guests with a sonorous: + +"PAX VOBISCUM!" + +He could not be induced to stay long, however. He had been perturbed +all day on account of the Duchess who now threatened to join the +Moravian Brotherhood; she was so annoyed about a little thing which had +happened. He did not quite believe it, of course; but, like a +well-trained priest, took nothing for granted and was prepared for +every emergency where ladies are concerned. + +"Just one glass!" said Keith. + +"Let me drink to your health ere we part," added the bishop. "I am +sorry to leave you. Our friendship will endure. We meet in September, +during the vintage season. Keith has been talking to me. I am as wax in +his hands. Your smile, Don Francesco, will follow me across the ocean. +Just one glass!" + +"Ah, well!" said the priest. "The next best thing to leading others +astray is to be led astray oneself." + +He gulped down a couple of tumblers and dutifully took his leave, +turning round, as he reached the staircase, to make a playful gesture +of benediction towards the assembled company. + +"Don't leave your bottle half empty," Keith called after him, +imploringly. "It looks untidy." + +"And so unhappy," added the bishop. "Dear me! This is most singular. I +seem to see two lamps instead of one. It must have been those +apricots." + +Keith interposed: + +"Or perhaps you strained one of your eyes bathing. It has happened to +me, occasionally. Darkness is the best remedy. It rests the optic +nerve." + +"Shall we take a turn or two outside?" asked Denis. + +It was past midnight as the two climbed out of the cave into the night +air. A cool north wind blew across the market-place. The bishop was +filled with a sense--a clear-cut, all-convincing sense--of the +screamingly funny insignificance of everything. Then he noticed the +moon. + +It dangled over the water, waning, sickly, moth-eaten, top-heavy, and +altogether out of condition--as if it had been on duty for weeks on end. +In other respects, too, its appearance was not quite normal. In fact, +it soon took to behaving in the most extraordinary fashion. Sometimes +there were two moons, and sometimes one. They seemed to merge +together--to glide into each other, and then to separate again. Mr. +Heard was vastly pleased and puzzled by the phenomenon--so pleased that +he gave utterance to one of the longest speeches he had made since his +arrival on Nepenthe. He said: + +"I have seen many funny things here, Denis. But this is the funniest of +all. The spectacle seems to have been providentially arranged, as a +sort of BONNE BOUCHE, for my last evening on the island. Dear me. Now +there are two again. And now they are behind each other once more. A +kind of celestial hide and seek. Most interesting. I wish Keith could +see it. Or that dear Count Caloveglia. He would be sure to say +something polite.... The inconstant moon! I know, at last, what the +poet meant by that expression, though the word inconstant strikes me as +hardly forcible enough. The skittish moon, I should be inclined to call +it. The skittish moon. The frivolous moon. The giddy moon. The +quite-too-absurd moon.... There it goes again! Very curious. What +can it be?... Why, this is the reverse of an eclipse, my boy. The +disk is darkened during an eclipse. It disappears IN VACUO. In the +present case it is brightened and rendered, so to speak, doubly +apparent. What would you call the reverse of an eclipse, Denis? +Anti-eclipse? That sounds rather barbaric to my ears. One should never +mix Greek and Latin, if it can possibly be avoided. Well?" + +"We must have a good look at this thing from your window, and then find +out all about it." + +"Oh, but I could not possibly take you from your friends! I know my way +home perfectly well. You will not dream of accompanying me." + +"Indeed I will. I walked with you to that house when you first arrived +here, and helped you to unpack. Don't you remember? And now you must +let me take you there on our last evening...." + +By the time Denis returned to the grotto a more exuberant and +incoherent tone had been generated among the guests. He was not +pleased. He felt inclined to be stern. A number of reprobates from the +Club had dropped in, and Keith, whom he meant to keep straight for one +night at least, was saying silly things and giving himself away. So was +the excellent Mr. Richards. + +"This is a good island," observed that gentleman. "We discourse like +sages and drink like swine. Peace with Honour!... How that old Jew +took our English measure, eh? How he laughed in his sleeve at our +infatuation for a phrase like that. Peace with Honour! The sort of +claptrap that makes a man feel so jolly comfortable inside, so damned +satisfied with everything like after a good deed. And that sentimental +primrose business. Dizzy as flower-expert! What cared he for primroses? +Votes and moneybags was what he was after. But he knew the British +Public. And that accounts for the pious domestic button-hole. Who ever +heard of a Jew telling the difference between a primrose and any other +kind of rose? They're not such blasted fools." + +"Excuse me," said Keith, rising from his seat in an afflatus of +inspiration. "Excuse me. I know the difference. It is primarily a +question of nutrition. Glucose! I am a great believer in glucose. +Because, even if it could be proved that the monks of Palaiokastron +stripped the vine of its leaves and thereby hastened the maturing of +the grape without reducing its natural supply of sugar--" + +"You don't shine," interrupted Denis, "when you talk like that." + +"Because even if this could be proved, which I greatly doubt, yet +nothing on earth will make me believe that glucose is otherwise than +beneficial to vegetation. Because--" + +"Do sit down, Keith. You are monopolizing the conversation." + +"Because the glucose resides within that verdant foliage like truth in +her well, like the oyster within its pearl. The monks of +Palaiokastron--they got it straight from Noah. I am a great believer in +glucose. Which is absurd. Because--" + +"Oh, shut up! You are making a perfect exhibition of yourself. Can't +you oblige me, for once in the way?" + +Denis was growing seriously alarmed for the reputation of his friend. +He had changed of late; he was beginning to know his own mind. He meant +to put a stop to this humiliating scene. As the other, regardless of +his pleadings, continued to babble dithyrambic nonsense concerning +glucose and self-fertilization and artificial manures and inflorescence +and Assyrian bas-reliefs and Stilton cheese, he suddenly gripped his +arm and pulled him, with a crash, into his chair. + +"Sit down, you double-distilled owl!" + +This was the first virile achievement of his young life, and directed +to a worthy end. For it was obvious to the meanest intelligence that +Mr. Keith was considerably drunk. Too surprised to utter a word of +protest, the orator paused in his declamation, beaming blandly at +nobody in particular. Then he remarked, in quite a subdued tone of +voice: + +"We are all at the mercy of youth. Mr. Richards! Could you oblige me +with a fairy-tale?" + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of South Wind, by Norman Douglas + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SOUTH WIND *** + +***** This file should be named 4508.txt or 4508.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/4/5/0/4508/ + +Produced by Charles Aldarondo Aldarondo@yahoo.com and Colin +Choat CChoat@sanderson.net.au + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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