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In the hall the +servants, who were passing to and fro, drew aside to let us go by them, +but I felt that their eyes were fixed upon me with the curiosity which +had pursued me since the morning. The large door giving on to the park +was open, although the night was cool, and in the shadow I could make out +groups of country folk gathered there to catch a glimpse of the +festivities through the windows. These good people were laughing and +whispering; they were silent for a moment as we advanced to ascend the +staircase, but I once more felt that I was the mark of these inquisitive +looks and the object of all these smiles. The face of mamma, who +accompanied me, was much flushed, and large tears were flowing from her +eyes. + +How was it that an event so gay for some was so sad for others? + +When I think over it now I can hardly keep my countenance. What silly +terrors at that frightful yet charming moment! Yet, after all, one +exaggerates things a great deal. + +On reaching the first floor mamma stopped, choking, took my head in her +hands, and kissed me on the forehead, and exclaimed, "Valentine!" I was +not greatly moved by this outburst, knowing that mamma, since she has +grown a little too stout, has some difficulty in getting upstairs. +I judged, therefore, that the wish to take breath for a moment without +appearing to do so had something to do with this sudden halt. + +We entered the nuptial chamber; it was as coquettish as possible, +refreshing to the eye, snug, elegant, and adorned with fine Louis XVI +furniture, upholstered in Beauvais tapestry. The bed, above all, was a +marvel of elegance, but to tell the truth I had no idea of it till a week +later. At the outside it seemed to me that I was entering an austere- +looking locality; the very air we breathed appeared to me to have +something solemn and awe-striking about it. + +"Here is your room, child," said mamma; "but first of all come and sit +here beside me, my dear girl." + +At these words we both burst into tears, and mamma then expressed herself +as follows: + +"The kiss you are giving me, Valentine, is the last kiss that I shall +have from you as a girl. Your husband--for Georges is that now--" + +At these words I shuddered slightly, and by a singular freak of my brain +pictured to myself Monsieur Georges--Georges--my husband--in a cotton +night cap and a dressing-gown. The vision flashed across my mind in the +midst of the storm. I saw him just as plainly as if he had been there. +It was dreadful. The nightcap came over his forehead, down to his +eyebrows, and he said to me, pressing my hand; "At last, Valentine; you +are mine; do you love me? oh! tell me, do you love me?" And as his +head moved as he uttered these words, the horrible tuft at the end of his +nightcap waggled as an accompaniment. + +"No," I said to myself, "it is impossible for my husband to appear in +such a fashion; let me banish this image--and yet my father wears the +hideous things, and my brother, who is quite young, has them already. +Men wear them at all ages, unless though--" It is frightful to relate, +but Georges now appeared to me with a red-and-green bandanna handkerchief +tied round his head. I would have given ten years of my life to be two +hours older, and hurriedly passed my hand across my eyes to drive away +these diabolical visions. + +However, mamma, who had been still speaking all the time, attributing +this movement to the emotion caused by her words, said, with great +sweetness: + +"Do not be alarmed, my dear Valentine; perhaps I am painting the picture +in too gloomy colors; but my experience and my love render this duty +incumbent upon me." + +I have never heard mamma express herself so fluently. I was all the more +surprised as, not having heard a word of what she had already said, this +sentence seemed suddenly sprung upon me. Not knowing what to answer, +I threw myself into the arms of mamma, who, after a minute or so, put me +away gently, saying, "You are suffocating me, dear." + +She wiped her eyes with her little cambric handkerchief, which was damp, +and said, smilingly: + +"Now that I have told you what my conscience imposed on me, I am strong. +See, dear, I think that I can smile. Your husband, my dear child, is a +man full of delicacy. Have confidence; accept all without misgiving." + +Mamma kissed me on the forehead, which finished off her sentence, and +added: + +"Now, dear one, I have fulfilled a duty I regarded as sacred. Come here +and let me take your wreath off." + +"By this time," I thought, "they have noticed that I have left the +drawing-room. They are saying, 'Where is the bride?' and smiling, +'Monsieur Georges is getting uneasy. What is he doing? what is he +thinking? where is he?'" + +"Have you tried on your nightcap, dear?" said mamma, who had recovered +herself; "it looks rather small to me, but is nicely embroidered. Oh, it +is lovely!" + +And she examined it from every point of view. + +At that moment there was a knock at the door. "It is I," said several +voices, among which I distinguished the flute-like tones of my aunt +Laura, and those of my godmother. Madame de P., who never misses a +chance of pressing her two thick lips to some one's cheeks, accompanied +them. Their eyes glittered, and all three had a sly and triumphant look, +ferreting and inquisitive, which greatly intimidated me. Would they also +set about fulfilling a sacred duty? + +"Oh, you are really too pretty, my angel!" said Madame de P., kissing me +on the forehead, after the moist fashion peculiar to her, and then +sitting down in the large Louis XVI armchair. + +My maid had not been allowed to undress me, so that all of them, taking +off their gloves, set to work to render me this service. They tangled +the laces, caught their own lace in the hooks, and laughed heartily all +the while. + +"It is the least that the oldest friend of the family," --she loved to +speak of herself as such-- "should make herself useful at such a moment," +muttered Madame de P., holding her eyeglass in one hand and working with +the other. + +I passed into a little boudoir to complete my toilette for the night, +and found on the marble of the dressing-table five or six bottles of +scent, tied up with red, white, and blue ribbons--an act of attention on +the part of my Aunt Laura. I felt the blood flying to my head; there was +an unbearable singing in my ears. Now that I can coolly weigh the +impressions I underwent, I can tell that what I felt above all was anger. +I would have liked to be in the farthest depths of the wildest forest in +America, so unseemly did I find this curious kindness which haunted me +with its attentions. I should have liked to converse a little with +myself, to fathom my own emotion somewhat, and, in short, to utter a +brief prayer before throwing myself into the torrent. + +However, through the open door, I could hear the four ladies whispering +together and stifling their outbursts of laughter; I had never seen them +so gay. I made up my mind. I crossed the room, and, shaking off the +pretty little white slippers which my mother had embroidered for me, +jumped into bed. I was not long in finding out that it was no longer my +own narrow little bed. It was immense, and I hesitated a moment, not +knowing which way to turn. I felt nevertheless a feeling of physical +comfort. The bed was warm, and I do not know what scent rose from its +silken coverlet. I felt myself sink into the mass of feathers, the +pillows, twice over too large and trimmed with embroidery, gave way as it +were beneath me, burying me in a soft and perfumed abyss. + +At length the ladies rose, and after giving a glance round the room, +doubtless to make sure that nothing was lacking, approached the bed. + +"Good-night, my dear girl," said my mother, bending over me. + +She kissed me, carried her handkerchief, now reduced to a wet dab, to her +eyes, and went out with a certain precipitation. + +"Remember that the old friend of the family kissed you on this night, my +love," said Madame de P., as she moistened my forehead. + +"Come, my little lamb, good-night and sleep well," said my aunt, with her +smile that seemed to issue from her nose. She added in a whisper: "You +love him, don't you? The slyboots! she won't answer! Well, since you +love him so much, don't tell him so, my dear. But I must leave you; you +are sleepy. Goodnight." + +And she went away, smiling. + +At length I was alone. I listened; the doors were being closed, I heard +a carriage roll along the road; the flame of the two candles placed upon +the mantelshelf quivered silently and were reflected in the looking- +glass. + +I thought about the ceremony of that morning, the dinner, the ball. +I said to myself, clenching my fists to concentrate my thoughts: "How was +Marie dressed? She was dressed in--dressed in--dressed in--" I repeated +the words aloud to impart more authority to them and oblige my mind to +reply; but do what I would, it was impossible for me to drive away the +thought that invaded my whole being. + +"He is coming. What is he doing? Where is he? Perhaps he is on the +stairs now. How shall I receive him when he comes?" + +I loved him; oh! with my whole soul, I can acknowledge it now; but I +loved him quite at the bottom of my heart. In order to think of him I +went down into the very lowest chamber of my heart, bolted the door, and +crouched down in the darkest corner. + +At last, at a certain moment, the floor creaked, a door was opened in the +passage with a thousand precautions, and I heard the tread of a boot--a +boot! + +The boot ceased to creak, and I heard quite close to me, on the other +side of the wall, which was nothing but a thin partition, an armchair +being rolled across the carpet, and then a little cough, which seemed to +me to vibrate with emotion. It was he! But for the partition I could +have touched him with my finger. A few moments later I could distinguish +the almost imperceptible sound of footsteps on the carpet; this faint +sound rang violently in my head. All at once my breathing and my heart +both stopped together; there was a tap at the door. The tapping was +discreet, full of entreaty and delicacy. I wanted to reply, "Come in," +but I had no longer any voice; and, besides, was it becoming to answer +like that, so curtly and plainly? I thought "Come in" would sound +horribly unseemly, and I said nothing. There was another tap. I should +really have preferred the door to have been broken open with a hatchet or +for him to have come down the chimney. In my agony I coughed faintly +among my sheets. That was enough; the door opened, and I divined from +the alteration in the light shed by the candles that some one at whom I +did not dare look was interposing between them and myself. + +This some one, who seemed to glide across the carpet, drew near the bed, +and I could distinguish out of the corner of my eye his shadow on the +wall. I could scarcely restrain my joy; my Captain wore neither cotton +nightcap nor bandanna handkerchief. That was indeed something. However, +in this shadow which represented him in profile, his nose had so much +importance that amid all my uneasiness a smile flitted across my lips. +Is it not strange how all these little details recur to your mind? I did +not dare turn round, but I devoured with my eyes this shadow representing +my husband; I tried to trace in it the slightest of his gestures; I even +sought the varying expressions of his physiognomy, but, alas! in vain. + +I do not know how to express in words all that I felt at that moment; my +pen seems too clumsy to write my sensations, and, besides, did I really +see deep into my heart? + +Do men comprehend all this? Do they understand that the heart requires +gradual changes, and that if a half-light awakens, a noon-day blaze +dazzles and burns? It is not that the poor child, who is trembling in +a corner, refuses to learn; far from that, she has aptitude, good-will, +and a quick and ready intelligence; she knows she has reached the age at +which it is necessary to know how to read; she rejects neither the +science nor even the teacher. It is the method of instruction that makes +her uneasy. She is afraid lest this young professor, whose knowledge is +so extensive, should turn over the pages of the book too quickly and +neglect the A B C. + +A few hours back he was the submissive, humble lover, ready to kneel down +before her, hiding his knowledge as one hides a sin, speaking his own +language with a thousand circumspections. At any moment it might have +been thought that he was going to blush. She was a queen, he a child; +and now all at once the roles are changed; it is the submissive subject +who arrives in the college cap of a professor, hiding under his arm an +unknown and mysterious book. Is the man in the college cap about to +command, to smile, to obtrude himself and his books, to speak Latin, to +deliver a lecture? + +She does not know that this learned individual is trembling, too; that he +is greatly embarrassed over his opening lesson, that emotion has caused +him to forget his Latin, that his throat is parched and his legs are +trembling beneath him. She does not know this, and I tell you between +ourselves, it is not her self-esteem that suffers least at this +conjecture. She suffers at finding herself, after so many signatures, +contracts, and ceremonies-still a charming child, and nothing more. + +I believe that the first step in conjugal life will, according to the +circumstances accompanying it, give birth to captivating sympathies or +invincible repulsion. But to give birth to these sympathies, to strike +the spark that is to set light to this explosion of infinite gratitude +and joyful love--what art, what tact, what delicacy, and at the same time +what presence of mind are needed. + +How was it that at the first word Georges uttered my terrors vanished? +His voice was so firm and so sweet, he asked me so gayly for leave to +draw near the fire and warm his feet, and spoke to me with such ease and +animation of the incidents of the day. I said to myself, "It is +impossible for the least baseness to be hidden under all this." +In presence of so much good-humor and affability my scaffolding fell to +pieces. I ventured a look from beneath the sheets: I saw him comfortably +installed in the big armchair, and I bit my lips. I am still at a loss +to understand this little fit of ill-temper. When one is reckoning on a +fright, one is really disappointed at its delaying itself. Never had +Georges been more witty, more affectionate, more well-bred; he was still +the man of the day before. He must really have been very excited. + +"You are tired out, I am certain, darling," he said. + +The word "darling" made me start, but did not frighten me; it was the +first time he had called me so, but I really could not refuse him the +privilege of speaking thus. However it may be, I maintained my reserve, +and in the same tone as one replies, "No thanks, I don't take tea," +I answered: + +"Oh, yes! I am worn out." + +"I thought so," he added, approaching the bed; "you can not keep your +eyes open; you can not even look at me, my dear little wife." + +"I will leave you," continued he. "I will leave you; you need repose." +And he drew still more closely to me, which was not natural. Then, +stretching out his hand, which I knew was white and well cared for: +"Won't you give me a little shake of the hand, dear? I am half asleep, +too, my pretty little wife." His face wore an expression which was +alarming, though not without its charm; as he said this, I saw clearly +that he had lied to me like a demon, and that he was no more sleepy than +I was. + +However that may be, I was guilty of the fault, the carelessness that +causes disaster, of letting him take my hand, which was straying by +chance under the lace of the pillows. + +I was that evening in a special condition of nervous sensibility, for at +this contact a strange sensation ran through me from head to foot. It +was not that the Captain's hand had the softness of satin--I believe that +physical sensations, in us women, have causes directly contrary to those +which move men; for that which caused me such lively emotion was +precisely its firmness. There was something strong, manly, and powerful +about it. He squeezed my hand rather strongly. + +My rings, which I have a fancy for wearing all at once, hurt me, and-- +I really should not have believed it--I liked it very much, perhaps too +much. For the first time I found an inexplicable, an almost +intoxicating, charm in this intimate contact with a being who could have +crushed me between his fingers, and that in the middle of the night too, +in silence, without any possibility of help. It was horribly delicious. + +I did not withdraw my hand, which he kissed, but lingeringly. The clock +struck two, and the last sound had long since died away when his lips +were still there, quivering with rapid little movements, which were so +many imperceptible kisses, moist, warm, burning. I felt gleams of fire +flashing around me. I wished to draw away my hand, but could not; I +remember perfectly well that I could not. His moustache pricked me, and +whiffs of the scent with which he perfumed it reached me and completed my +trouble. I felt my nostrils dilating despite myself, and, striving but +in vain to take refuge in my inmost being, I exclaimed inwardly: "Protect +me, Lord, but this time with all your might. A drop of water, Lord; a +drop of water!" I waited--no appreciable succor reached from above. It +was not till a week afterward that I understood the intentions of +Providence. + +"You told me you were sleepy," I murmured, in a trembling voice. I was +like a shipwrecked person clutching at a floating match-box; I knew quite +well that the Captain would not go away. + +"Yes, I was sleepy, pet," said Georges, approaching his face to mine; +"but now I am athirst." He put his lips to my ear and whispered softly, +"Athirst for a kiss from you, love." + +This "love" was the beginning of another life. The spouse now appeared, +the past was fleeing away, I was entering on the future. At length I had +crossed the frontier; I was in a foreign land. Oh! I acknowledge--for +what is the use of feigning?--that I craved for this love, and I felt +that it engrossed me and spread itself through me. I felt that I was +getting out of my depth, I let go the last branch that held me to the +shore, and to myself I repeated: "Yes, I love you; yes, I am willing to +follow you; yes, I am yours, love, love, love!" + +"Won't you kiss your husband; come, won't you?" + +And his mouth was so near my own that it seemed to meet my lips. + +"Yes," said I. + + ............................. + +August 7th, 185- How many times have I not read through you during the +last two years, my little blue note-book! How many things I might add as +marginal notes if you were not doomed to the flames, to light my first +fire this autumn! How could I have written all this, and how is it that +having done so I have not dared to complete my confidences! No one has +seen you, at any rate; no one has turned your pages. Go back into your +drawer, dear, with, pending the first autumn fire, a kiss from your +Valentine. + +NOTE.--Owing to what circumstances this blue note-book, doomed to the +flames, was discovered by me in an old Louis XVI chiffonnier I had just +bought does not greatly matter to you, dear reader, and would be out of +my power to explain even if it did. + + + + +CHAPTER XIV + +THE BLUE NOTE-BOOK AGAIN + +Only to think that I was going to throw you into the fire, poor dear! +Was I not foolish? In whom else could I confide? If I had not you, +to whom could I tell all those little things at which every one laughs, +but which make you cry! + +This evening, for instance, I dined alone, for Georges was invited out; +well, to whom else can I acknowledge that when I found myself alone, +face to face with a leg of mutton, cooked to his liking, and with the +large carving-knife which is usually beside his plate, before me, I began +to cry like a child? To whom else can I admit that I drank out of the +Bohemian wine-glass he prefers, to console me a little? + +But if I were to mention this they would laugh in my face. Father +Cyprien himself, who nevertheless has a heart running over with kindness, +would say to me: + +"Let us pass that by, my dear child; let us pass that by." + +I know him so well, Father Cyprien; while you, you always listen to me, +my poor little note-book; if a tear escapes me, you kindly absorb it and +retain its trace like a good-hearted friend. Hence I love you. + +And, since we are tete-a-tete, let us have a chat. You won't be angry +with me for writing with a pencil, dear. You see I am very comfortably +settled in my big by-by and I do not want to have any ink-stains. The +fire sparkles on the hearth, the street is silent; let us forget that +George will not return till midnight, and turn back to the past. + +I can not recall the first month of that dear past without laughing and +weeping at one and the same time. + +How foolish we were! How sweet it was! There is a method of teaching +swimming which is not the least successful, I am told. It consists in +throwing the future swimmer into the water and praying God to help him. +I am assured that after the first lesson he keeps himself afloat. + +Well, I think that we women are taught to be wives in very much the same +fashion. + +Happy or otherwise--the point is open to discussion marriage is a +hurricane--something unheard-of and alarming. + +In a single night, and without any transition, everything is transformed +and changes color; the erst while-cravatted, freshly curled, carefully +dressed gentleman makes his appearance in a dressing-gown. That which +was prohibited becomes permissible, the code is altered, and words +acquire a meaning they never had before, et cetera, et cetera. + +It is not that all this is so alarming, if taken the right way--a woman +with some courage in her heart and some flexibility in her mind supports +the shock and does not die under it; but the firmest of us are amazed at +it, and stand open-mouthed amid all these strange novelties, like a +penniless gourmand in the shop of Potel and Chabot. + +They dare not touch these delicacies surrounding them, though invited to +taste. It is not that the wish or the appetite is lacking to them, but +all these fine fruits have been offered them so lately that they have +still the somewhat acid charm of green apples or forbidden fruit. They +approach, but they hesitate to bite. + +After all, why complain? What would one have to remember if one had +entered married life like an inn, if one had not trembled a little when +knocking at the door? And it is so pleasant to recall things, that one +would sometimes like to deck the future in the garments of the past. + +It was, I recollect, two days after the all-important one. I had gone +into his room, I no longer remember why--for the pleasure of going in, +I suppose, and thereby acting as a wife. A strong desire is that which +springs up in your brain after leaving church to look like an old married +woman. You put on caps with ribbons, you never lay aside your cashmere +shawl, you talk of "my home"--two sweet words--and then you bite your +lips to keep from breaking out into a laugh; and "my husband," and "my +maid," and the first dinner you order, when you forget the soup. All +this is charming, and, however ill at ease you may feel at first in all +these new clothes, you are quite eager to put them on. + +So I had gone into the dressing-room of my husband, who, standing before +the glass, very lightly clad, was prosaically shaving. + +"Excuse me, dear," said he, laughing, and he held up his shaving-brush, +covered with white lather. "You will pardon my going on with this. Do +you want anything?" + +"I came, on the contrary," I answered, "to see whether you had need of +anything;" and, greatly embarrassed myself, for I was afraid of being +indiscreet, and I was not sure whether one ought to go into one's +husband's room like this, I added, innocently, "Your shirts have buttons, +have they not?" + +"Oh, what a good little housewife I have married! Do not bother yourself +about such trifles, my pet. I will ask your maid to look after my +buttons," said he. + +I felt confused; I was afraid of appealing too much of a schoolgirl in +his eyes. He went on working his soap into a lather with his shaving- +brush. I wanted to go away, but I was interested in such a novel fashion +by the sight of my husband, that I had not courage to do so. His neck +was bare--a thick, strong neck, but very white and changing its shape at +every movement--the muscles, you know. It would have been horrible in a +woman, that neck, and yet it did not seem ugly to me. Nor was it +admiration that thus inspired me; it was rather like gluttony. I wanted +to touch it. His hair, cut very short--according to regulation--grew +very low, and between its beginning and the ear there was quite a smooth +white place. The idea at once occurred to me that if ever I became brave +enough, it was there that I should kiss him oftenest; it was strange, +that presentiment, for it is in fact on that little spot that I-- + +He stopped short. I fancied I understood that he was afraid of appearing +comical in my eyes, with his face smothered in lather; but he was wrong. +I felt myself all in a quiver at being beside a man--the word man is +rather distasteful to me, but I can not find another, for husband would +not express my thoughts--at being beside a man in the making of his +toilette. I should have liked him to go on without troubling himself; +I should have liked to see how he managed to shave himself without +encroaching on his moustache, how he made his parting and brushed his +hair with the two round brushes I saw on the table, what use he made of +all the little instruments set out in order on the marble-tweezers, +scissors, tiny combs, little pots and bottles with silver tops, and a +whole arsenal of bright things, that aroused quite a desire to beautify +one's self. + +I should have liked him while talking to attend to the nails of his +hands, which I was already very fond of; or, better still, to have handed +them over to me. How I should have rummaged in the little corners, cut, +filed, arranged all that. + +"Well, dear, what are you looking at me like that for?" said he, +smiling. + +I lowered my eyes at once, and felt that I was blushing. I was uneasy, +although charmed, amid these new surroundings. I did not know what to +answer, and mechanically I dipped the tip of my finger into the little +china pot in which the soap was being lathered. + +"What is the matter, darling?" said he, approaching his face to mine; +"have I offended you?" + +I don't know what strange idea darted through my mind, but I suddenly +took my hand from the pot and stuck the big ball of lather at the end of +my finger on the tip of his nose. He broke out into a hearty laugh, and +so did I; though I trembled for a moment, lest he should be angry. + +"So that's the way in which you behave to a captain in the lancers? You +shall pay for this, you wicked little darling;" and, taking the shaving +brush in his hand, he chased me round the room. I dodged round the +table, I took refuge behind the armchair, upsetting his boots with my +skirt, getting the tongs at the same time entangled in it. Passing the +sofa, I noticed his uniform laid out--he had to wait on the General that +morning--and, seizing his schapska, I made use of it as a buckler. But +laughter paralyzed me, and besides, what could a poor little woman do +against a soldier, even with a buckler? + +He ended by catching me--the struggle was a lovely one. It was all very +well for me to scream, as I threw my head backward over the arm by which +he clasped me; I none the less saw the frightful brush, like a big +snowball, at the end of a little stick, come nearer and yet nearer. + +But he was merciful; he was satisfied with daubing a little white spot on +my chin and exclaiming, "The cavalry have avenged themselves." + +Seizing the brush in turn, I said to him roguishly, "Captain, let me +lather your face," for I did so want to do that. + +In answer, he held his face toward me, and, observing that I was obliged +to stand on the tips of my toes and to support myself a little on his +shoulder, he knelt down before me and yielded his head to me. + +With the tip of my finger I made him bend his face to the right and the +left, backward and forward, and I lathered and lathered, giggling like a +schoolgirl. It amused me so to see my Captain obey me like a child; +I would have given I don't know what if he had only had his sword and +spurs on at that moment. Unfortunately, he was in his slippers. I +spread the lather over his nose and forehead; he closed his eyes and put +his two arms round me, saying: + +"Go on, my dear, go on; but see that you don't put any into my mouth." + +At that moment I experienced a very strange feeling. My laughter died +away all at once; I felt ashamed at seeing my husband at my feet and at +thus amusing myself with him as if he were a doll. + +I dropped the shaving-brush; I felt my eyes grow moist; and, suddenly, +becoming more tender, I bent toward him and kissed him on the neck, which +was the only spot left clear. + +Yet his ear was so near that, in passing it, my lips moved almost in +spite of myself, and I whispered: + +"Don't be angry, dear," then, overcome by emotion and repentance, +I added: "I love you, I do love you." + +"My own pet!" he said, rising suddenly. His voice shook. + +What delightful moments these were! Unfortunately, oh! yes, indeed, +unfortunately, he could not press his lathered face to mine! + +"Wait a little," he exclaimed, darting toward the washbasin, full of +water, "wait an instant!" + +But it seemed as if it took him a week to wash it off. + + + + +CHAPTER XV + +MY WIFE GOES TO A DANCE + +Madame--Ah! it is so nice of you to come home early! (Looking at the +clock.) A quarter to six. But how cold you are! your hands are frozen; +come and sit by the fire. (She puts a log on the fire.) I have been +thinking of you all day. It is cruel to have to go out in such weather. +Have you finished your doubts? are you satisfied? + +Monsieur--Quite well satisfied, dear. (Aside.) But I have never known my +wife to be so amiable. (Aloud, taking up the bellows.) Quite well +satisfied, and I am very hungry. Has my darling been good? + +Madame--You are hungry. Good! (Calling out.) Marie, call into the +kitchen that your master wants to dine early. Let them look after +everything--and send up a lemon. + +Monsieur--A mystery? + +Madame--Yes, Monsieur, I have a little surprise for you, and I fancy that +it will delight you. + +Monsieur--Well, what is the surprise? + +Madame--Oh! it is a real surprise. How curious you look! your eyes are +glittering already. Suppose I were not to tell you anything? + +Monsieur--Then you would vex me very much. + +Madame--There, I don't want to vex you. You are going to have some +little green oysters and a partridge. Am I good? + +Monsieur--Oysters and a partridge! You are an angel. (He kisses her.) +An angel. (Aside.) What on earth is the matter with her? (Aloud.) Have +you had visitors to-day? + +Madame--I saw Ernestine this morning, but she only stayed a moment. She +has just discharged her maid. Would you believe it, that girl was seen +the night before last dressed up as a man, and in her master's clothes, +too! That was going too far. + +Monsieur--That comes of having confidential servants. And you just got a +sight of Ernestine? + +Madame--And that was quite enough, too. (With an exclamation.) How +stupid I am! I forgot. I had a visit from Madame de Lyr as well. + +Monsieur--God bless her! But does she still laugh on one side of her +mouth to hide her black tooth? + +Madame-How cruel you are! Yet, she likes you very well. Poor woman! +I was really touched by her visit. She came to remind me that we-- +now you will be angry. (She kisses him and sits down beside him.) + +Monsieur--Be angry! be angry! I'm not a Turk. Come, what is it? + +Madame--Come, we shall go to dinner. You know that there are oysters and +a partridge. I won't tell you--you are already in a bad temper. +Besides, I all but told her that we are not going. + +Monsieur--(raising his hands aloft)--I thought so. She and her evening +may go to the dogs. What have I done to this woman that she should so +pester me? + +Madame--But she thinks she is affording you pleasure. She is a charming +friend. As for me, I like her because she always speaks well of you. +If you had been hidden in that cabinet during her visit, you could not +have helped blushing. (He shrugs his shoulders.) "Your husband is so +amiable," she said to me, "so cheery, so witty. Try to bring him; it is +an honor to have him." I said, "Certainly," but without meaning it, you +know. But I don't care about it at all. It is not so very amusing at +Madame de Lyr's. She always invites such a number of serious people. No +doubt they are influential people, and may prove useful, but what does +that matter to me? Come to dinner. You know that there is a bottle left +of that famous Pomard; I have kept it for your partridge. You can not +imagine what pleasure I feel in seeing you eat a partridge. You eat it +with such a gusto. You are a glutton, my dear. (She takes his arm.) +Come, I can hear your rascal of a son getting impatient in the dining- +room. + +Monsieur--(with a preoccupied air)--Hum! and when is it? + +Madame--When is what? + +Monsieur--The party, of course. + +Madame--Ah! you mean the ball--I was not thinking of it. Madame de Lyr's +ball. Why do you ask me that, since we are not going? Let us make +haste, dinner is getting cold . . . . This evening. + +Monsieur--(stopping short)--What! this party is a ball, and this ball is +for this evening. But, hang it! people don't invite you to a ball like +that. They always give notice some time beforehand. + +Madame--But she sent us an invitation a week ago, though I don't know +what became of the card. I forgot to show it to you. + +Monsieur--You forgot! you forgot! + +Madame--Well, it is all for the best; I know you would have been sulky +all the week after. Come to dinner. + +They sat down to table. The cloth was white, the cutlery bright, the +oysters fresh; the partridge, cooked to perfection, exhaled a delightful +odor. Madame was charming, and laughed at everything. Monsieur unbent +his brows and stretched himself on the chair. + +Monsieur--This Pomard is very good. Won't you have some, little dear? + +Madame--Yes, your little dear will. (She pushes forward her glass with a +coquettish movement.) + +Monsieur--Ah! you have put on your Louis Seize ring. It is a very pretty +ring. + +Madame--(putting her hand under her husband's nose)--Yes; but look--see, +there is a little bit coming off. + +Monsieur--(kissing his wife's hand)--Where is the little bit? + +Madame--(smiling)--You jest at everything. I am speaking seriously. +There--look--it is plain enough! (They draw near once another and bend +their heads together to see it.) Don't you see it? (She points out a +spot on the ring with a rosy and slender finger.) There! do you see now +--there? + +Monsieur--That little pearl which--What on earth have you been putting on +your hair, my dear? It smells very nice--You must send it to the +jeweller. The scent is exquisite. Curls don't become you badly. + +Madame--Do you think so? (She adjusts her coiffure with her white hand.) +I thought you would like that scent; now, if I were in your place I +should-- + +Monsieur--What would you do in my place, dear? + +Madame--I should--kiss my wife. + +Monsieur--(kissing her)--Well, I must say you have very bright ideas +sometimes. Give me a little bit more partridge, please. (With his mouth +full.) How pretty these poor little creatures look when running among the +corn. You know the cry they give when the sun sets?--A little gravy.-- +There are moments when the poetic side of country life appeals to one. +And to think that there are barbarians who eat them with cabbage. But +(filling his glass) have you a gown ready? + +Madame--(with innocent astonishment.)--What for, dear? + +Monsieur--Why, for Madame de Lyr's-- + +Madame--For the ball?--What a memory you have--There you are still +thinking of it--No, I have not--ah! yes, I have my tarletan, you know; +but then a woman needs so little to make up a ball-room toilette. + +Monsieur--And the hairdresser, has he been sent for? + +Madame--No, he has not been sent for; but I am not anxious to go to this +ball. We will settle down by the fireside, read a little, and go to bed +early. You remind me, however, that, on leaving, Madame de Lyr did say, +"Your hairdresser is the same as mine, I will send him word." How stupid +I am; I remember now that I did not answer her. But it is not far, I can +send Marie to tell him not to come. + +Monsieur--Since this blessed hairdresser has been told, let him come and +we will go and--amuse ourselves a little at Madame de Lyr's. But on one +condition only; that I find all my dress things laid out in readiness on +my bed with my gloves, you know, and that you tie my necktie. + +Madame--A bargain. (She kisses him.) You are a jewel of a husband. I am +delighted, my poor dear, because I see you are imposing a sacrifice upon +yourself in order to please me; since, as to the ball itself, I am quite +indifferent about it. I did not care to go; really now I don't care to +go. + +Monsieur--Hum. Well, I will go and smoke a cigar so as not to be in your +way, and at ten o'clock I will be back here. Your preparations will be +over and in five minutes I shall be dressed. Adieu. + +Madame--Au revoir. + +Monsieur, after reaching the street, lit his cigar and buttoned up his +great-coat. Two hours to kill. It seems a trifle when one is busy, but +when one has nothing to do it is quite another thing. The pavement is +slippery, rain is beginning to fall--fortunately the Palais Royal is not +far off. At the end of his fourteenth tour round the arcades, Monsieur +looks at his watch. Five minutes to ten, he will be late. He rushes +home. + +In the courtyard the carriage is standing waiting. + +In the bedroom two unshaded lamps shed floods of light. Mountains of +muslin and ribbons are piled on the bed and the furniture. Dresses, +skirts, petticoats, and underpetticoats, lace, scarfs, flowers, jewels, +are mingled in a charming chaos. On the table there are pots of pomade, +sticks of cosmetic, hairpins, combs and brushes, all carefully set out. +Two artificial plaits stretch themselves languishingly upon a dark mass +not unlike a large handful of horsehair. A golden hair net, combs of +pale tortoise-shell and bright coral, clusters of roses, sprays of white +lilac, bouquets of pale violets, await the choice of the artist or the +caprice of the beauty. And yet, must I say it? amidst this luxury of +wealth Madame's hair is undressed, Madame is uneasy, Madame is furious. + +Monsieur--(looking at his watch)--Well, my dear, is your hair dressed? + +Madame--(impatiently)--He asks me whether my hair is dressed? Don't you +see that I have been waiting for the hairdresser for an hour and a half? +Can't you see that I am furious, for he won't come, the horrid wretch? + +Monsieur--The monster! + +Madame--Yes, the monster; and I would advise you not to joke about it. + +There is a ring. The door opens and the lady's-maid exclaims, "It is he, +Madame!" + +Madame--It is he! + +Monsieur--It is he! + +The artist enters hurriedly and bows while turning his sleeves up. + +Madame--My dear Silvani, this is unbearable. + +Silvani--Very sorry, very, but could not come any sooner. I have been +dressing hair since three o'clock in the afternoon. I have just left the +Duchesse de W., who is going to the Ministry this evening. She sent me +home in her brougham. Lisette, give me your mistress's combs, and put +the curling-tongs in the fire. + +Madame--But, my dear Silvani, my maid's name is not Lisette. + +Silvani--You will understand, Madame, that if I had to remember the names +of all the lady's-maids who help me, I should need six clerks instead of +four. Lisette is a pretty name which suits all these young ladies very +well. Lisette, show me your mistress's dress. Good. Is the ball an +official one? + +Madame--But dress my hair, Silvani. + +Silvani--It is impossible for me to dress your hair, Madame, unless I +know the circle in which the coiffure will be worn. (To the husband, +seated in the corner.) May I beg you, Monsieur, to take another place? +I wish to be able to step back, the better to judge the effect. + +Monsieur--Certainly, Monsieur Silvani, only too happy to be agreeable to +you. (He sits down on a chair.) + +Madame--(hastily)--Not there, my dear, you will rumple my skirt. (The +husband gets up and looks for another seat.) Take care behind you, you +are stepping on my bustle. + +Monsieur--(turning round angrily)--Her bustle! her bustle! + +Madame--Now you go upsetting my pins. + +Silvani--May I beg a moment of immobility, Madame? + +Monsieur--Come, calm yourself, I will go into the drawing-room; is there +a fire there? + +Madame--(inattentively)--But, my dear, how can you expect a fire to be in +the drawing-room? + +Monsieur--I will go to my study, then. + +Madame--There is none there, either. What do you want a fire in your +study for? What a singular idea! High up, you know, Silvani, and a dash +of disorder, it is all the rage. + +Silvani--Would you allow a touch of brown under the eyes? That would +enable me to idealize the coiffure. + +Monsieur--(impatiently)--Marie, give me my top-coat and my cap. I will +walk up and down in the anteroom. (Aside.) Madame de Lyr shall pay for +this. + +Silvani--(crimping)--I leave your ear uncovered, Madame; it would be a +sin to veil it. It is like that of the Princesse de K., whose hair I +dressed yesterday. Lisette, get the powder ready. Ears like yours, +Madame, are not numerous. + +Madame--You were saying-- + +Silvani--Would your ear, Madame, be so modest as not to listen? + +Madame's hair is at length dressed. Silvani sheds a light cloud of +scented powder over his work, on which he casts a lingering look of +satisfaction, then bows and retires. + +In passing through the anteroom, he runs against Monsieur, who is walking +up and down. + +Silvani--A thousand pardons, I have the honor to wish you good night. + +Monsieur--(from the depths of his turned-up collar) Good-night. + +A quarter of an hour later the sound of a carriage is heard. Madame is +ready, her coiffure suits her, she smiles at herself in the glass as she +slips the glove-stretchers into the twelve-button gloves. + +Monsieur has made a failure of his necktie and broken off three buttons. +Traces of decided ill-humor are stamped on his features. + +Monsieur--Come, let us go down, the carriage is waiting; it is a quarter +past eleven. (Aside.) Another sleepless night. Sharp, coachman; Rue de +la Pepiniere, number 224. + +They reach the street in question. The Rue de la Pepiniere is in a +tumult. Policemen are hurriedly making way through the crowd. In the +distance, confused cries and a rapidly approaching, rumbling sound are +heard. Monsieur thrusts his head out of the window. + +Monsieur--What is it, Jean? + +Coachman--A fire, Monsieur; here come the firemen. + +Monsieur--Go on all the same to number 224. + +Coachman--We are there, Monsieur; the fire is at number 224. + +Doorkeeper of the House--(quitting a group of people and approaching the +carriage)--You are, I presume, Monsieur, one of the guests of Madame de +Lyr? She is terror-stricken; the fire is in her rooms. She can not +receive any one. + +Madame--(excitedly)--It is scandalous. + +Monsieur--(humming)--Heart-breaking, heartbreaking! (To the coachman.) +Home again, quickly; I am all but asleep. (He stretches himself out and +turns up his collar.) ( Aside.) After all, I am the better for a well- +cooked partridge. + + + + +CHAPTER XVI + +A FALSE ALARM + +Every time I visit Paris, which, unhappily, is too often, it rains in +torrents. It makes no difference whether I change the time of starting +from that which I had fixed upon at first, stop on the way, travel at +night, resort, in short, to a thousand devices to deceive the barometer- +at ten leagues from Paris the clouds begin to pile up and I get out of +the train amidst a general deluge. + +On the occasion of my last visit I found myself as usual in the street, +followed by a street porter carrying my luggage and addressing despairing +signals to all the cabs trotting quickly past amid the driving rain. +After ten minutes of futile efforts a driver, more sensible than the +others, and hidden in his triple cape, checks his horses. With a single +bound I am beside the cab, and opening, the door with a kind of frenzy, +jump in. + +Unfortunately, while I am accomplishing all this on one side, a +gentleman, similarly circumstanced, opens the other door and also jumps +in. It is easy to understand that there ensues a collision. + +"Devil take you!" said my rival, apparently inclined to push still +farther forward. + +I was about to answer him, and pretty sharply, too, for I hail from the +south of France and am rather hotheaded, when our eyes met. We looked +one another in the face like two lions over a single sheep, and suddenly +we both burst out laughing. This angry gentleman was Oscar V., that dear +good fellow Oscar, whom I had not seen for ten years, and who is a very +old friend of mine, a charming fellow whom I used to play with as a boy. + +We embraced, and the driver, who was looking at us through the window, +shrugged his shoulders, unable to understand it all. The two porters, +dripping with water, stood, one at each door, with a trunk on his +shoulder. We had the luggage put on the cab and drove off to the Hotel +du Louvre, where Oscar insisted on dropping me. + +"But you are travelling, too, then?" said I to my friend, after the +first moments of expansion. "Don't you live in Paris?" + +"I live in it as little as possible and have just come up from Les +Roches, an old-fashioned little place I inherited from my father, at +which I pass a great deal of the year. Oh! it is not a chateau; it is +rustic, countrified, but I like it, and would not change anything about +it. The country around is fresh and green, a clear little river flows +past about forty yards from the house, amid the trees; there is a mill in +the background, a spreading valley, a steeple and its weather-cock on the +horizon, flowers under the windows, and happiness in the house. Can I +grumble? My wife makes exquisite pastry, which is very agreeable to me +and helps to whiten her hands. By the way, I did not tell you that I am +married. My dear fellow, I came across an angel, and I rightly thought +that if I let her slip I should not find her equal. I did wisely. But I +want to introduce you to my wife and to show you my little place. When +will you come and see me? It is three hours from Paris--time to smoke a +couple of cigars. It is settled, then--I am going back to-morrow morning +and I will have a room ready for you. Give me your card and I will write +down my address on it." + +All this was said so cordially that I could not resist my friend's +invitation, and promised to visit him. + +Three or four days later, Paris being empty and the recollection of my +old companion haunting me, I felt a strong desire to take a peep at his +conjugal felicity and to see with my own eyes this stream, this mill, +this steeple, beside all which he was so happy. + +I reached Les Roches at about six in the evening and was charmed at the +very first glance. Oscar's residence was a little Louis Quinze chateau +buried in the trees; irregularly built, but charmingly picturesque. It +had been left unaltered for a century at least, and everything, from the +blackened mansard roofs with their rococo weather-cocks, to the bay +windows with their tiny squares of glass and the fantastic escutcheon +over the door, was in keeping. Over the thick tiles of the somewhat +sunken roof, the rough-barked old chestnuts lazily stretched their +branches. Creepers and climbing roses wantoned over the front, framing +the windows, peeping into the garrets, and clinging to the waterspouts, +laden with large bunches of flowers which swayed gently in the air. Amid +all these pointed roofs and this profusion of verdure and trees the blue +sky could only be caught a glimpse of here and there. + +The first person I saw was Oscar, clad in white from head to foot, and +wearing a straw hat. He was seated on an enormous block of stone which +seemed part and parcel of the house, and appeared very much interested in +a fine melon which his gardener had just brought to him. No sooner had +he caught sight of me than he darted forward and grasped me by the hand +with such an expression of good-humor and affection that I said to +myself, "Yes, certainly he was not deceiving me, he is happy." I found +him just as I had known him in his youth, lively, rather wild, but kind +and obliging. + +"Pierre," said he to the gardener, "take this gentleman's portmanteau to +the lower room," and, as the gardener bestirred himself slowly and with +an effort, Oscar seized the portmanteau and swung it, with a jerk, on to +the shoulders of the poor fellow, whose legs bent under the weight. + +"Lazybones," said Oscar, laughing heartily. "Ah! now I must introduce +you to my little queen. My wife, where is my wife?" + +He ran to the bell and pulled it twice. At once a fat cook with a red +face and tucked-up sleeves, and behind her a man-servant wiping a plate, +appeared at the ground-floor windows. Had they been chosen on purpose? +I do not know, but their faces and bearing harmonized so thoroughly with +the picture that I could not help smiling. + +"Where is your mistress?" asked Oscar, and as they did not answer +quickly enough he exclaimed, "Marie, Marie, here is my friend George." + +A young girl, fair as a lily, appeared at a narrow, little window, the +one most garlanded by, flowers, on the first floor. She was clad in a +white dressing-gown of some particular shape; I could not at first make +out. With one hand she gathered its folds about her, and with the other +restrained her flowing hair. Hardly had she seen me when she blushed, +somewhat ashamed, no doubt, at having been surprised in the midst of her +toilet, and, giving a most embarrassed yet charming bow; hurriedly +disappeared. This vision completed the charm; it seemed to me that I had +suddenly been transported into fairy-land. I had fancied when strapping +my portmanteau that I should find my friend Oscar installed in one of +those pretty, little, smart-looking houses, with green shutters and gilt +lightning-conductor, dear to the countrified Parisian, and here I found +myself amid an ideal blending of time-worn stones hidden in flowers, +ancient gables, and fanciful ironwork reddened by rust. I was right in +the midst of one of Morin's sketches, and, charmed and stupefied, I stood +for some moments with my eyes fixed on the narrow window at which the +fair girl had disappeared. + +"I call her my little queen," said Oscar, taking my arm. "It is my wife. +Come this way, we shall meet my cousin who is fishing, and two other +friends who are strolling about in this direction, good fellows, only +they do not understand the country as I do--they have on silk stockings +and pumps, but it does not matter, does it? Would you like a pair of +slippers or a straw hat? + +I hope you have brought some linen jackets. I won't offer you a glass of +Madeira--we shall dine at once. Ah! my dear fellow, you have turned up +at the right moment; we are going to taste the first melon of the year +this evening." + +"Unfortunately, I never eat melons, though I like to see others do so." + +"Well, then, I will offer you consolation by seeking out a bottle of my +old Pomard for you. Between ourselves, I don't give it to every one; it +is a capital wine which my poor father recommended to me on his deathbed; +poor father, his eyes were closed, and his head stretched back on the +pillow. I was sitting beside his bed, my hand in his, when I felt it +feebly pressed. His eyes half opened, and I saw him smile. Then he said +in a weak, slow, and the quavering voice of an old man who is dying: 'The +Pomard at the farther end--on the left--you know, my boy--only for +friends.' He pressed my hand again, and, as if exhausted, closed his +eyes, though I could see by the imperceptible motion of his lips that he +was still smiling inwardly. Come with me to the cellar," continued +Oscar, after a brief silence, "at the farther end to the left, you shall +hold the lantern for me." + +When we came up from the cellar, the bell was ringing furiously, and +flocks of startled birds were flying out of the chestnut-trees. It was +for dinner. All the guests were in the garden. Oscar introduced me in +his off-hand way, and I offered my arm to the mistress of the house to +conduct her to the dining-room. + +On examining my friend's wife, I saw that my first impression had not +been erroneous--she was literally a little angel, and a little angel in +the shape of a woman, which is all the better. She was delicate, slender +as a young girl; her voice was as thrilling and harmonious as the +chaffinch, with an indefinable accent that smacked of no part of the +country in particular, but lent a charm to her slightest word. She had, +moreover, a way of speaking of her own, a childish and coquettish way of +modulating the ends of her sentences and turning her eyes toward her +husband, as if to seek for his approbation. She blushed every moment, +but at the same time her smile was so bewitching and her teeth so white +that she seemed to be laughing at herself. A charming little woman! +Add to this a strange yet tasteful toilette, rather daring, perhaps, +but suiting this little queen, so singular in herself. Her beautiful +fair hair, twisted up apparently at hazard, was fixed rather high up on +the head by a steel comb worn somewhat on one side; and her white muslin +dress trimmed with wide, flat ruches, cut square at the neck, short in +the skirt, and looped up all round, had a delicious eighteenth-century +appearance. The angel was certainly a trifle coquettish, but in her own +way, and yet her way was exquisite. + +Hardly were we seated at table when Oscar threw toward his little queen +a rapid glance, but one so full of happiness and-why should I not say it? +--love that I experienced a kind of shiver, a thrill of envy, +astonishment, and admiration, perhaps. He took from the basket of +flowers on the table a red rose, scarcely opened, and, pushing it toward +her, said with a smile: + +"For your hair, Madame." + +The fair girl blushed deeply, took the flower, and, without hesitation, +quickly and dexterously stuck it in her hair, high up on the left, just +in the right spot, and, delightedly turning round to each of us, repeated +several times, amid bursts of laughter, "Is it right like that?" + +Then she wafted a tiny kiss with the tips of her fingers to her husband, +as a child of twelve would have done, and gayly plunged her spoon into +the soup, turning up her little finger as she did so. + +The other guests had nothing very remarkable about them; they laughed +very good-naturedly at these childish ways, but seemed somewhat out of +place amid all this charming freedom from restraint. The cousin, above +all, the angler, with his white waistcoat, his blue tie, his full beard, +and his almond eyes, especially displeased me. He rolled his r's like an +actor at a country theatre. He broke his bread into little bits and +nibbled them as he talked. I divined that the pleasure of showing off +a large ring he wore had something to do with this fancy for playing with +his bread. Once or twice I caught a glance of melancholy turned toward +the mistress of the house, but at first I did not take much notice of it, +my attention being attracted by the brilliant gayety of Oscar. + +It seemed to me, however, at the end of a minute or so, that this young +man was striving in a thousand ways to engage the attention of the little +queen. + +The latter, however, answered him in the most natural way in the world, +neither betraying constraint nor embarrassment. I was mistaken, +no doubt. Have you ever noticed, when you are suddenly brought into the +midst of a circle where you are unacquainted, how certain little details, +matters of indifference to every one else, assume importance in your +eyes? The first impression is based upon a number of trifles that catch +your attention at the outset. A stain in the ceiling, a nail in the +wall, a feature of your neighbor's countenance impresses itself upon your +mind, installs itself there, assumes importance, and, in spite of +yourself, all the other observations subsequently made by you group +around this spot, this nail, this grimace. Think over it, dear reader, +and you will see that every opinion you may have as to a fact, a person, +or an object has been sensibly influenced by the recollection of the +little trifle that caught your eye at the first glance. What young girl +victim of first impressions has not refused one or two husbands on +account of a waistcoat too loose, a cravat badly tied, an inopportune +sneeze, a foolish smile, or a boot too pointed at the toe? + +One does not like admitting to one's self that such trifles can serve as +a base to the opinion one has of any one, and one must seek attentively +in order to discover within one's mind these unacknowledged germs. + +I recollect quite well that the first time I had the honor of calling on +Madame de M., I noticed that one of her teeth, the first molar on the +right, was quite black. I only caught a glimpse of the little black +monster, such was the care taken to hide it, yet I could not get this +discovery out of my head. I soon noticed that Madame de M. made +frightful grimaces to hide her tooth, and that she took only the smallest +possible mouthfuls at table to spare the nervous susceptibilities of the +little monster. + +I arrived at the pitch of accounting for all the mental and physical +peculiarities of Madame de M. by the presence of this slight blemish, +and despite myself this black tooth personified the Countess so well that +even now, although it has been replaced by another magnificent one, twice +as big and as white as the bottom of a plate, even now, I say, Madame de +M. can not open her mouth without my looking naturally at it. + +But to return to our subject. Amid all this conjugal happiness, so +delightfully surrounded, face to face with dear old Oscar, so good, so +confiding, so much in love with this little cherub in a Louis XV dress, +who carried grace and naivete to so strange a pitch, I had been struck by +the too well combed and foppish head of the cousin in the white +waistcoat. This head had attracted my attention like the stain on the +ceiling of which I spoke just now, like the Countess's black tooth, and +despite myself I did not take my eyes off the angler as he passed the +silver blade of his knife through a slice of that indigestible fruit +which I like to see on the plates of others, but can not tolerate on my +own. + +After dinner, which lasted a very long time, we went into the garden, +where coffee had been served, and stretched ourselves out beatifically, +cigar in mouth. All was calm and silent about us, the insects had ceased +their music, and in an opaline sky little violet clouds were sleeping. + +Oscar, with a happy air, pointed out to me the famous mill, the quiet +valley, and farther on his loved stream, in which the sun, before +setting, was reflecting itself amid the reeds. Meanwhile the little +queen on her high heels flitted round the cups like a child playing at +party-giving, and with a thousand charming touches poured out the boiling +coffee, the odor of which blended deliciously with the perfume of the +flowers, the hay, and the woods. + +When she had finished she sat down beside her husband, so close that her +skirt half hid my friend, and unceremoniously taking the cigar from his +lips, held it at a distance, with a little pout, that meant, "Oh, the +horrid thing!" and knocked off with her little finger the ash which fell +on the gravel. Then she broke into a laugh, and put the cigar back +between the lips of her husband held out to her. + +It was charming. Oscar was no doubt accustomed to this, for he did not +seem astonished, but placed his hand on his wife's shoulder, as one would +upon a child's, and, kissing her on the forehead, said, "Thanks, my +dear." + +"Yes, but you are only making fun of me," said the young wife, in a +whisper, leaning her head against her husband's arm. + +I could not help smiling, there was so much coaxing childishness and +grace in this little whispered sentence. I do not know why I turned +toward the cousin who had remained a little apart, smoking in silence. +He seemed to me rather pale; he took three or four sudden puffs, rose +suddenly under the evident influence of some moral discomfort, and walked +away beneath the trees. + +"What is the matter with cousin?" said Oscar, with some interest. +"What ails him?" + +"I don't know," answered the little queen, in the most natural manner in +the world, "some idea about fishing, no doubt." + +Night began to fall; we had remained as I have said a long time at table. +It was about nine o'clock. The cousin returned and took the seat he had +occupied before, but from this moment it seemed to me that a strange +constraint crept in among us, a singular coolness showed itself. The +talk, so lively at first, slackened gradually and, despite all my efforts +to impart a little life to it, dragged wretchedly. I myself did not feel +very bright; I was haunted by the most absurd notions in the world; +I thought I had detected in the sudden departure of the cousin, in his +pallor, in his embarrassed movements, the expression of some strong +feeling which he had been powerless to hide. But how was it that that +adorable little woman with such a keen intelligent look did not +understand all this, since I understood it myself? Had not Oscar, +however confiding he might be, noted that the departure of the cousin +exactly coincided with the kiss he had given his wife? Were these two +blind, or did they pretend not to see, or was I myself the victim of an +illusion? However, conversation had died away; the mistress of the +house, singular symptom, was silent and serious, and Oscar wriggled in +his chair, like a man who is not altogether at ease. What was passing in +their minds? + +Soon we heard the clock in the drawing-room strike ten, and Oscar, +suddenly rising, said: "My dear fellow, in the country it is Liberty +Hall, you know; so I will ask your permission to go in--I am rather tired +this evening. George," he added to me, "they will show you your room; it +is on the ground floor; I hope that you will be comfortable there." + +Everybody got up silently, and, after bidding one another good-night in +a somewhat constrained manner, sought their respective rooms. I thought, +I must acknowledge, that they went to bed rather too early at my +friend's. I had no wish to sleep; I therefore examined my room, which +was charming. It was completely hung with an old figured tapestry framed +in gray wainscot. The bed, draped in dimity curtains, was turned down +and exhaled that odor of freshly washed linen which invites one to +stretch one's self in it. On the table, a little gem dating from the +beginning of the reign of Louis XVI, were four or five books, evidently +chosen by Oscar and placed there for me. These little attentions touch +one, and naturally my thoughts recurred to the dear fellow, to the +strange incident of the evening, to the vexations and tortures hidden,, +perhaps, by this apparent happiness. I was ridiculous that night-- +I already pitied him, my poor friend. + +I felt quite touched, and, full of melancholy, went and leaned against +the sill of the open window. The moon had just risen, the sky was +beautifully clear, whiffs of delicious perfumes assailed my nostrils. +I saw in the shadow of the trees glowworms sparkling on the grass, and, +in the masses of verdure lit up mysteriously by the moon, I traced +strange shapes of fantastic monsters. There was, above all, a little +pointed roof surmounted by a weathercock, buried in the trees at about +fifty paces from my window, which greatly interested me. I could not in +the obscurity make out either door or windows belonging to this singular +tower. Was it an old pigeon-house, a tomb, a deserted summer-house? +I could not tell, but its little pointed roof, with a round dormer +window, was extremely graceful. Was it chance or an artist lull of taste +that had covered this tower with creepers and flowers, and surrounded it +with foliage in such capricious fashion that it seemed to be hiding +itself in order to catch all glances? I was gazing at all this when I +heard a faint noise in the shrubbery. I looked in that direction and I +saw--really, it was an anxious moment--I saw a phantom clad in a white +robe and walking with mysterious and agitated rapidity. At a turning of +the path the moon shone on this phantom. Doubt was impossible; I had +before my eyes my friend's wife. Her gait no longer had that coquettish +ease which I had noticed, but clearly indicated the agitation due to some +strong emotion. + +I strove to banish the horrible suspicion which suddenly forced itself +into my mind. "No," I said to myself, "so much innocence and beauty can +not be capable of deception; no doubt she has forgotten her fan or her +embroidery, on one of the benches there." But instead of making her way +toward the benches I noticed on the right, the young wife turned to the +left, and soon disappeared in the shadow of the grove in which was hidden +the mysterious turret. + +My heart ached. "Where is she going, the hapless woman?" I exclaimed to +myself. "At any rate, I will not let her imagine any one is watching +her." And I hurriedly blew out my candle. I wanted to close my window, +go to bed, and see nothing more, but an invincible curiosity took me back +to the window. I had only been there a few minutes when I plainly +distinguished halting and timid footsteps on the gravel. I could see no +one at first, but there was no doubt that the footsteps were those of a +man. I soon had a proof that I was not mistaken; the elongated outline +of the cousin showed up clearly against the dark mass of shrubbery. +I should have liked to have stopped him, the wretch, for his intention +was evident; he was making his way toward the thicket in which the little +queen had disappeared. I should have liked to shout to him, "You are a +villain; you shall go no farther." But had I really any right to act +thus? I was silent, but I coughed, however, loud enough to be heard by +him. + +He suddenly paused in his uneasy walk, looked round on all sides with +visible anxiety, then, seized by I know not what impulse, darted toward +the pavilion. I was overwhelmed. What ought I to do? Warn my friend, +my childhood's companion? Yes, no doubt, but I felt ashamed to pour +despair into the mind of this good fellow and to cause a horrible +exposure. "If he can be kept in ignorance," I said to myself, "and then +perhaps I am wrong--who knows? Perhaps this rendezvous is due to the +most natural motive possible." + +I was seeking to deceive myself, to veil the evidence of my own eyes, +when suddenly one of the house doors opened noisily, and Oscar--Oscar +himself, in all the disorder of night attire, his hair rumpled, and his +dressing-gown floating loosely, passed before my window. He ran rather +than walked; but the anguish of his heart was too plainly revealed in the +strangeness of his movements. He knew all. I felt that a mishap was +inevitable. "Behold the outcome of all his happiness, behold the bitter +poison enclosed in so fair a vessel!" All these thoughts shot through my +mind like arrows. It was necessary above all to delay the explosion, +were it only for a moment, a second, and, beside myself, without giving +myself time to think of what I was going to say to him, I cried in a +sharp imperative tone: + +"Oscar, come here; I want to speak to you." + +He stopped as if petrified. He was ghastly pale, and, with an infernal +smile, replied, "I have no time-later on." + +"Oscar, you must, I beg of you--you are mistaken." + +At these words he broke into a fearful laugh. + +"Mistaken--mistaken!" + +And he ran toward the pavilion. + +Seizing the skirt of his dressing-gown, I held him tightly, exclaiming: + +"Don't go, my dear fellow, don't go; I beg of you on my knees not to go." + +By way of reply he gave me a hard blow on the arm with his fist, +exclaiming: + +"What the devil is the matter with you?" + +"I tell you that you can not go there, Oscar," I said, in a voice which +admitted of no contradiction. + +"Then why did not you tell me at once." + +And feverishly snatching his dressing-gown from my grasp, he began to +walk frantically up and down. + + + + +CHAPTER XVII + +I SUP WITH MY WIFE + +That evening, which chanced to be Christmas Eve, it was infernally cold. +The snow was falling in heavy flakes, and, driven by the wind, beat +furiously against the window panes. The distant chiming of the bells +could just be heard through this heavy and woolly atmosphere. Foot- +passengers, wrapped in their cloaks, slipped rapidly along, keeping close +to the house and bending their heads to the wintry blast. + +Enveloped in my dressing-gown, and tapping with my fingers on the window- +panes, I was smiling at the half-frozen passers-by, the north wind, and +the snow, with the contented look of a man who is in a warm room and has +on his feet comfortable flannel-lined slippers, the soles of which are +buried in a thick carpet. At the fireside my wife was cutting out +something and smiling at me from time to time; a new book awaited me on +the mantelpiece, and the log on the hearth kept shooting out with a +hissing sound those little blue flames which invite one to poke it. + +"There is nothing that looks more dismal than a man tramping through the +snow, is there?" said I to my wife. + +"Hush," said she, lowering the scissors which she held in her hand; and, +after smoothing her chin with her fingers, slender, rosy, and plump at +their tips, she went on examining the pieces of stuff she had cut out. + +"I say that it is ridiculous to go out in the cold when it is so easy to +remain at home at one's own fireside." + +"Hush." + +"But what are you doing that is so important?" + +"I--I am cutting out a pair of braces for you," and she set to work +again. But, as in cutting out she kept her head bent, I noticed, on +passing behind her, her soft, white neck, which she had left bare that +evening by dressing her hair higher than usual. A number of little downy +hairs were curling there. This kind of down made me think of those ripe +peaches one bites so greedily. I drew near, the better to see, and I +kissed the back of my wife's neck. + +"Monsieur!" said Louise, suddenly turning round. + +"Madame," I replied, and we both burst out laughing. + +"Christmas Eve," said I. + +"Do you wish to excuse yourself and to go out?" + +"Do you mean to complain?" + +"Yes, I complain that you are not sufficiently impressed by the fact of +its being Christmas Eve. The ding-ding-dong of the bells of Notre Dame +fails to move you; and just now when the magic-lantern passed beneath the +window, I looked at you while pretending to work, and you were quite +calm." + +"I remain calm when the magic-lantern is going by! Ah! my dear, you are +very severe on me, and really--" + +"Yes, yes, jest about it, but it was none the less true that the +recollections of your childhood have failed." + +"Now, my dear, do you want me to leave my boots out on the hearth this +evening on going to bed? Do you want me to call in the magic-lantern +man, and to look out a big sheet and a candle end for him, as my poor +mother used to do? I can still see her as she used to entrust her white +sheet to him. 'Don't make a hole in it, at least,' she would say. How +we used to clap our hands in the mysterious darkness! I can recall all +those joys, my dear, but you know so many other things have happened +since then. Other pleasures have effaced those." + +"Yes, I can understand, your bachelor pleasures; and, there, I am sure +that this Christmas Eve is the first you have passed by your own +fireside, in your dressing-gown, without supper; for you used to sup on +Christmas Eve." + +"To sup, to sup." + +"Yes, you supped; I will wager you did." + +"I have supped two or three times, perhaps, with friends, you know; two +sous' worth of roasted chestnuts and--" + +"A glass of sugar and water." + +"Oh, pretty nearly so. It was all very simple; as far as I can +recollect. We chatted a little and went to bed." + +"And he says that without a smile. You have never breathed a word to me +of all these simple pleasures." + +"But, my dear, all that I am telling you is strictly true. I remember +that once, however, it was rather lively. It was at Ernest's, and we had +some music. Will you push that log toward me? But, never mind; it will +soon be midnight, and that is the hour when reasonable people--" + +Louise, rising and throwing her arms around my neck, interrupted me with: +"Well, I don't want to be reasonable, I want to wipe out all your +memories of chestnuts and glasses of sugar and water." + +Then pushing me into my dressing-room she locked the door. + +"But, my dear, what is the matter with you?" said I through the keyhole. + +"I want ten minutes, no more. Your newspaper is on the mantelpiece; you +have not read it this evening. There are some matches in the corner." + +I heard a clatter of crockery, a rustling of silk my wife mad? + +Louise soon came and opened the door. + +"Don't scold me for having shut you up," she said, kissing me. "Look how +I have beautified myself? Do you recognize the coiffure you are so fond +of, the chignon high, and the neck bare? Only as my poor neck is +excessively timid, it would have never consented to show itself thus if +I had not encouraged it a little by wearing my dress low. And then one +must put on full uniform to sup with the authorities." + +"To sup?" + +"Certainly, to sup with you; don't you see my illuminations and this +table covered with flowers and a heap of good things? I had got it all +ready in the alcove; but you understand that to roll the table up to the +fire and make a little toilette, I wanted to be alone. Come, Monsieur, +take your place at table. I am as hungry as a hunter. May I offer you a +wing of cold chicken?" + +"Your idea is charming, but, dear, really I am ashamed; I am in my +dressing-gown." + +"Take off your dressing-gown if it incommodes you, Monsieur, but don't +leave this chicken wing on my hands. I want to serve you myself." And, +rising, she turned her sleeves up to the elbow, and placed her table +napkin on her arm. + +"It is thus that the waiters at the restaurant do it, is it not?" + +"Exactly; but, waiter, allow me at least to kiss your hand." + +"I have no time," said she, laughing, sticking the corkscrew into the +neck of the bottle. "Chambertin--it is a pretty name; and then do you +remember that before our marriage (how hard this cork is!) you told me +that you liked it on account of a poem by Alfred de Musset? which, by +the way, you have not let me read yet. Do you see the two little +Bohemian glasses which I bought expressly for this evening? We will +drink each other's health in them." + +"And his, too, eh?" + +"The heir's, poor dear love of an heir! I should think so. And then I +will put away the two glasses against this time next year; they shall be +our Christmas Eve glasses? Every year we will sup like this together, +however old we may get." + +"But, my dear, how about the time when we have no longer any teeth?" + +"Well, we will sup on good strong soups; it will be very nice, all the +same. Another piece, please, with some of the jelly. Thanks." + +As she held out her plate I noticed her arm, the outline of which was +lost in lace. + +"Why are you looking up my sleeve instead of eating?" + +"I am looking at your arm, dear. You are charming, let me tell you, this +evening. That coiffure suits you so well, and that dress which I was +unacquainted with." + +"Well, when one seeks to make a conquest--" + +"How pretty you look, pet!" + +"Is it true that you think me charming, pretty, and a pet this evening? +Well, then," lowering her eyes and smiling at her bracelets, "in that +case I do not see why--" + +"What is it you do not see, dear?" + +"I do not see any reason why you should not come and give me just a +little kiss." + +And as the kiss was prolonged, she said to me, amid bursts of laughter, +her head thrown back, and showing the double row of her white teeth: +"I should like some pie; yes, some brie! You will break my Bohemian +glass, the result of my economy. You always cause some mishap when you +want to kiss me. Do you recollect at Madame de Brill's ball, two days +before our marriage, how you tore my skirt while waltzing in the little +drawing-room?" + +"Because it is difficult to do two things at once-to keep step and to +kiss one's partner." + +"I recollect, too, when mamma asked how my skirt had got torn, I felt +that I was blushing up to my ears. And Madame D., that old jaundiced +fairy, who said to me with her Lenten smile, 'How flushed you are +tonight, my dear child!' I could have strangled her! I said it was the +key of the door that had caught it. I looked at you out of the corner of +my eye; you were pulling your moustache and seemed greatly annoyed--you +are keeping all the truffles for yourself; that is kind--not that one; +I want the big black one there in the corner-it was very wrong all the +same, for--oh! not quite full--I do not want to be tipsy--for, after all, +if we had not been married--and that might have happened, for you know +they say that marriages only depend on a thread. Well, if the thread had +not been strong enough, I should have remained a maid with a kiss on my +shoulder, and a nice thing that would have been." + +"Bah! it does not stain." + +"Yes, Monsieur, it does, I beg your pardon. It stains so much that there +are husbands, I believe, who even shed their blood to wash out such +little stains." + +"But I was joking, dear. Hang it!--don't you think--yes, certainly, hang +it!" + +"Ah! that's right, I like to see you angry. You are a trifle jealous, +dear--oh! that is too bad; I asked you for the big black one, and you +have gone and eaten it." + +"I am sorry, dear; I quite forgot about it." + +"It was the same at the Town Hall, where I was obliged to jog your elbow +to make you answer 'Yes' to the Mayor's kind words." + +"Kind!" + +"Yes, kind. I thought him charming. No one could have been more +graceful than he was in addressing me. 'Mademoiselle, will you consent +to accept for your husband that great, ugly fellow standing beside you?'" +(Laughing, with her mouth full.) "I wanted to say to him, 'Let us come to +an understanding, Mr. Mayor; there is something to be said on either +side.' I am choking!"--she bursts out laughing-- "I was wrong not to +impose restrictions. Your health, dear! I am teasing you; it is very +stupid. I said 'Yes' with all my heart, I can assure you, dear, and I +thought the word too weak a one. When I think that all women, even the +worst, say that word, I feel ashamed not to have found another." Holding +out her glass: "To our golden wedding--will you touch glasses?" + +"And to his baptism, little mamma." + +In a low voice: "Tell me--are you sorry you married me?" + +Laughing, "Yes." Kissing her on the shoulder, "I think I have found the +stain again; it was just there." + +"It is two in the morning, the fire is out, and I am a little--you won't +laugh now? Well, I am a little dizzy." + +"A capital pie, eh?" + +"A capital pie! We shall have a cup of tea for breakfast tomorrow, shall +we not?" + + + + +CHAPTER XVIII + +FROM ONE THING TO ANOTHER + + SCENE.--The country in autumn--The wind is blowing without--MADAME, + seated by the fireside in a large armchair, is engaged in needlework + --MONSIEUR, seated in front of her, is watching the flames of the + fire--A long silence. + +Monsieur--Will you pass me the poker, my dear? + +Madame--(humming to herself)--"And yet despite so many fears." (Spoken.) +Here is the poker. (Humming.) "Despite the painful----" + +Monsieur--That is by Mehul, is it not, my dear? Ah! that is music--I saw +Delaunay Riquier in Joseph. (He hums as he makes up the fire.) "Holy +pains." (Spoken.) One wonders why it does not burn, and, by Jove! it +turns out to be green wood. Only he was a little too robust--Riquier. +A charming voice, but he is too stout. + +Madame--(holding her needlework at a distance, the better to judge of the +effect)--Tell me, George, would you have this square red or black? You +see, the square near the point. Tell me frankly. + +Monsieur--(singing) "If you can repent." (Spoken without turning his +head.) Red, my dear; red. I should not hesitate; I hate black. + +Madame--Yes, but if I make that red it will lead me to-- (She reflects.) + +Monsieur--Well, my dear, if it leads you away, you must hold fast to +something to save yourself. + +Madame--Come, George, I am speaking seriously. You know that if this +little square is red, the point can not remain violet, and I would not +change that for anything. + +Monsieur--(slowly and seriously)--My dear, will you follow the advice of +an irreproachable individual, to whose existence you have linked your +fate? Well, make that square pea-green, and so no more about it. Just +look whether a coal fire ever looked like that. + +Madame--I should only be too well pleased to use up my pea-green wool; I +have a quantity of it. + +Monsieur--Then where lies the difficulty? + +Madame--The difficulty is that pea-green is not sufficiently religious. + +Monsieur--Hum! (Humming.) Holy pains! (Spoken.) Will you be kind enough +to pass the bellows? Would it be indiscreet to ask why the poor pea- +green, which does not look very guilty, has such an evil reputation? You +are going in for religious needlework, then, my dear? + +Madame--Oh, George! I beg of you to spare me your fun. I have been +familiar with it for a long time, you know, and it is horribly +disagreeable to me. I am simply making a little mat for the +confessional-box of the vicar. There! are you satisfied? You know what +it is for, and you must understand that under the present circumstances +pea-green would be altogether out of place. + +Monsieur--Not the least in the world. I can swear to you that I could +just as well confess with pea-green under my feet. It is true that I am +naturally of a resolute disposition. Use up your wool; I can assure you +that the vicar will accept it all the same. He does not know how to +refuse. (He plies the bellows briskly.) + +Madame--You are pleased, are you not? + +Monsieur--Pleased at what, dear? + +Madame--Pleased at having vented your sarcasm, at having passed a jest on +one who is absent. Well, I tell you that you are a bad man, seeing that +you seek to shake the faith of those about you. My beliefs had need be +very fervent, principles strong, and have real virtue, to resist these +incessant attacks. Well, why are you looking at me like that? + +Monsieur--I want to be converted, my little apostle. You are so pretty +when you speak out; your eyes glisten, your voice rings, your gestures-- +I am sure that you could speak like that for a long time, eh? (He kisses +her hand, and takes two of her curls and ties them under hey chin.) You +are looking pretty, my pet. + +Madame--Oh! you think you have reduced me to silence because you have +interrupted me. Ah! there, you have tangled my hair. How provoking you +are! It will take me an hour to put it right. You are not satisfied +with being a prodigy of impiety, but you must also tangle my hair. Come, +hold out your hands and take this skein of wool. + +Monsieur--(sitting down on a stool, which he draws as closely as possible +to Madame, and holding up his hands) My little Saint John! + +Madame--Not so close, George; not so close. (She smiles despite +herself.) How silly you are! Please be careful; you will break my wool. + +Monsieur--Your religious wool. + +Madame--Yes, my religious wool. (She gives him a little pat on the +cheek.) Why do you part your hair so much on one side, George? It would +suit you much better in the middle, here. Yes, you may kiss me, but +gently. + +Monsieur--Can you guess what I am thinking of? + +Madame--How do you imagine I could guess that? + +Monsieur--Well, I am thinking of the barometer which is falling and of +the thermometer which is falling too. + +Madame--You see, cold weather is coming on and my mat will never be +finished. Come, let us make haste. + +Monsieur--I was thinking of the thermometer which is falling and of my +room which faces due north. + +Madame--Did you not choose it yourself? My wool! Good gracious! my +wool! Oh! the wicked wretch! + +Monsieur--In summer my room with the northern aspect is, no doubt, very +pleasant; but when autumn comes, when the wind creeps in, when the rain +trickles down the windowpanes, when the fields, the country, seem hidden +under a huge veil of sadness, when the spoils of our woodlands strew the +earth, when the groves have lost their mystery and the nightingale her +voice--oh! then the room with the northern aspect has a very northern +aspect, and-- + +Madame--(continuing to wind her wool)--What nonsense you are talking! + +Monsieur--I protest against autumns, that is all. God's sun is hidden +and I seek another. Is not that natural, my little fairhaired saint, my +little mystic lamb, my little blessed palmbranch? This new sun I find in +you, pet--in your look, in the sweet odor of your person, in the rustling +of your skirt, in the down on your neck which one notices by the lamp- +light when you bend over the vicar's mat, in your nostril which expands +when my lips approach yours-- + +Madame--Will you be quiet, George? It is Friday, and Ember week. + +Monsieur--And your dispensation? (He kisses her.) Don't you see that +your hand shakes, that you blush, that your heart is beating? + +Madame--George, will you have done, sir? (She pulls away her hand, +throws herself back in the chair, and avoids her husband's glance.) + +Monsieur--Your poor little heart beats, and it is right, dear; it knows +that autumn is the time for confidential chats and evening caresses, the +time for kisses. And you know it too, for you defend yourself poorly, +and I defy you to look me in the face. Come! look me in the face. + +Madame--(she suddenly leans toward hey husband, the ball of wool rolling +into the fireplace, the pious task falling to the ground. She takes his +head between her hands)--Oh, what a dear, charming husband you would be +if you had-- + +Monsieur--If I had what? Tell me quickly. + +Madame--If you had a little religion. I should only ask for such a +little at the beginning. It is not very difficult, I can assure you. +While, now, you are really too-- + +Monsieur--Pea-green, eh? + +Madame--Yes, pea-green, you great goose. (She laughs frankly.) + +Monsieur--(lifting his hands in the air)--Sound trumpets! Madame has +laughed; Madame is disarmed. Well, my snowwhite lamb, I am going to +finish my story; listen properly, there, like that--your hands here, my +head so. Hush! don't laugh. I am speaking seriously. As I was saying +to you, the north room is large but cold, poetic but gloomy, and I will +add that two are not too many in this wintry season to contend against +the rigors of the night. I will further remark that if the sacred ties +of marriage have a profoundly social significance, it is--do not +interrupt me--at that hour of one's existence when one shivers on one's +solitary couch. + +Madame--You can not be serious. + +Monsieur--Well, seriously, I should like the vicar's mat piously spread +upon your bed, to keep us both warm together, this very evening. I wish +to return as speedily as possible to the intimacy of conjugal life. Do +you hear how the wind blows and whistles through the doors? The fire +splutters, and your feet are frozen. (He takes her foot in his hands.) + +Madame--But you are taking off my slipper, George. + +Monsieur--Do you think, my white lamb, that I am going to leave your poor +little foot in that state? Let it stay in my hand to be warmed. Nothing +is so cold as silk. What! openwork stockings? My dear, you are rather +dainty about your foot-gear for a Friday. Do you know, pet, you can not +imagine how gay I wake up when the morning sun shines into my room. You +shall see. I am no longer a man; I am a chaffinch; all the joys of +spring recur to me. I laugh, I sing, I speechify, I tell tales to make +one die of laughter. Sometimes I even dance. + +Madame--Come now! I who in the morning like neither noise nor broad +daylight--how little all that suits! + +Monsieur--(suddenly changing his tone)--Did I say that I liked all that? +The morning sun? Never in autumn, my sweet dove, never. I awake, on the +contrary full of languor and poesy; I was like that in my very cradle. +We will prolong the night, and behind the drawn curtain, behind the +closed shutter, we will remain asleep without sleeping. Buried in +silence and shadow, delightfully stretched beneath your warm eider-down +coverlets, we will slowly enjoy the happiness of being together, and we +will wish one another good-morning only on the stroke of noon. You do +not like noise, dear. I will not say a word. Not a murmur to disturb +your unfinished dream and warn you that you are no longer sleeping; not a +breath to recall you to reality; not a movement to rustle the coverings. +I will be silent as a shade, motionless as a statue; and if I kiss you-- +for, after all, I have my weaknesses--it will be done with a thousand +precautions, my lips will scarcely brush your sleeping shoulder; and if +you quiver with pleasure as you stretch out your arms, if your eye half +uncloses at the murmur of my kiss, if your lips smile at me, if I kiss +you, it would be because you would like me to, and I shall have nothing +to reproach myself with. + +Madame--(her eyes half closed, leaning back in hey armchair, her head +bent with emotion, she places her hands before his mouth. In a low +voice)--Hush, hush! Don't say that, dear; not another word! If you knew +how wrong it was! + +Monsieur--Wrong! What is there that is wrong? Is your heart of marble +or adamant, that you do not see that I love you, you naughty child? That +I hold out my arms to you, that I long to clasp you to my heart, and to +fall asleep in your hair? What is there more sacred in the world than to +love one's wife or love one's husband? (Midnight strikes.) + +Madame--(she suddenly changes hey expression at the sound, throws her +arms round her husband, and hurriedly kisses him thrice)--You thought I +did not love you, eh, dear? Oh, yes! I love you. Great baby! not to +see that I was waiting the time. + +Monsieur--What time, dear? + +Madame--The time. It has struck twelve, see. (She blushes crimson.) +Friday is over. (She holds out her hand for him to kiss.) + +Monsieur--Are you sure the clock is not five minutes fast, love? + + + + +CHAPTER XIX + +A LITTLE CHAT + + MADAME F----- MADAME H------ + + (These ladies are seated at needlework as they talk.) + +Madame F--For myself, you know, my dear, I fulfil my duties tolerably, +still I am not what would be called a devotee. By no means. Pass me +your scissors. Thanks. + +Madame H--You are quite welcome, dear. What a time those little squares +of lace must take. I am like yourself in respect of religion; in the +first place, I think that nothing should be overdone. Have you ever- +I have never spoken to any one on the subject, but I see your ideas are +so in accordance with my own that-- + +Madame F--Come, speak out, dear; you trust me a little, I hope. + +Madame H--Well, then, have you--tell me truly--ever had any doubts? + +Madame F--(after reflecting for a moment)--Doubts! No. And you? + +Madame H--I have had doubts, which has been a real grief to me. Heavens! +how I have wept. + +Madame F--I should think so, my poor dear. For my own part, my faith is +very strong. These doubts must have made you very unhappy. + +Madame H--Terribly so. You know, it seems as if everything failed you; +there is a vacancy all about you--I have never spoken about it to my +husband, of course--Leon is a jewel of a man, but he will not listen to +anything of that kind. I can still see him, the day after our marriage; +I was smoothing my hair--broad bands were then worn, you know. + +Madame F--Yes, yes; they were charming. You will see that we shall go +back to them. + +Madame H--I should not be surprised; fashion is a wheel that turns. +Leon, then, said to me the day after our wedding: "My dear child, I shall +not hinder you going to church, but I beg you, for mercy's sake, never to +say a word to me about it." + +Madame F--Really, Monsieur H. said that to you? + +Madame H--Upon my honor. Oh! my husband is all that is most--or, if you +prefer it, all that is least-- + +Madame F--Yes, yes, I understand. That is a grief, you know. Mine is +only indifferent. From time to time he says some disagreeable things to +me on the question, but I am sure he could be very easily brought back to +the right. At the first illness he has, you shall see. When he has only +a cold in the head, I notice the change. You have not seen my thimble? + +Madame H--Here it is. Do not be too sure of that, dear; men are not to +be brought back by going "chk, chk" to them, like little chickens. And +then, though I certainly greatly admire the men who observe religious +practices, you know me well enough not to doubt that--I think, as I told +you, that nothing should be exaggerated. And yourself, pet, should you +like to see your husband walking before the banner with a great wax taper +in his right hand and a bouquet of flowers in his left? + +Madame F--Oh! no, indeed. Why not ask me at once whether I should like +to see Leon in a black silk skull cap, with cotton in his ears and a holy +water sprinkler in his hand? One has no need to go whining about a +church with one's nose buried in a book to be a pious person; there is a +more elevated form of religion, which is that of--of refined people, you +know. + +Madame H--Ah! when you speak like that, I am of your opinion. I think, +for instance, that there is nothing looks finer than a man while the host +is being elevated. Arms crossed, no book, head slightly bowed, grave +look, frock coat buttoned up. Have you seen Monsieur de P. at mass? +How well he looks! + +Madame F--He is such a fine man, and, then, he dresses so well. Have you +seen him on horseback? Ah! so you have doubts; but tell me what they +are, seeing we are indulging in confidences. + +Madame H--I can hardly tell you. Doubts, in short; about hell, for +instance, I have had horrible doubts. Oh! but do not let us speak about +that; I believe it is wrong even to think of it. + +Madame F--I have very broad views on that point; I never think about it. +Besides, my late confessor helped me. "Do not seek too much," he always +said to me, "do not try to understand that which is unfathomable." You +did not know Father Gideon? He was a jewel of a confessor; I was +extremely pleased with him. Not too tedious, always discreet, and, above +all, well-bred. He turned monk from a romantic cause--a penitent was +madly in love with him. + +Madame H--Impossible! + +Madame F--Yes, really. What! did you not know about it? The success of +the monastery was due to that accident. Before the coming of Father +Gideon it vegetated, but on his coming the ladies soon flocked there in +crowds. They organized a little guild, entitled "The Ladies of the +Agony." They prayed for the Chinese who had died without confession, +and wore little death's heads in aluminum as sleeve-links. It became +very fashionable, as you are aware, and the good fathers organized, in +turn, a registry for men servants; and the result is that, from one thing +leading to another, the community has become extremely wealthy. I have +even heard that one of the most important railway stations in Paris is +shortly to be moved, so that the size of their garden can be increased, +which is rather restricted at present. + +Madame H--As to that, it is natural enough that men should want a place +to walk in at home; but what I do not understand is that a woman, however +pious she may be, should fall in love with a priest. It is all very +well, but that is no longer piety; it is--fanaticism. I venerate +priests, I can say so truly, but after all I can not imagine myself--you +will laugh at me--ha, ha, ha! + +Madame F--Not at all. Ha, ha, ha! what a child you are! + +Madame H--(working with great briskness)--Well, I can not imagine that +they are men--like the others. + +Madame F--(resuming work with equal ardor)--And yet, my dear, people say +they are. + +Madame H--There are so many false reports set afloat. (A long silence.) + +Madame F--(in a discreet tone of voice)--After all, there are priests who +have beards--the Capuchins, for instance. + +Madame H--Madame de V. has a beard right up to her eyes, so that counts +for nothing, dear. + +Madame F--That counts for nothing. I do not think so. In the first +place, Madame de V.'s beard is not a perennial beard; her niece told me +that she sheds her moustaches every autumn. What can a beard be that can +not stand the winter? A mere trifle. + +Madame H--A mere trifle that is horribly ugly, my dear. + +Madame F--Oh! if Madame de V. had only moustaches to frighten away +people, one might still look upon her without sorrow, but-- + +Madame H--I grant all that. Let us allow that the Countess's moustache +and imperial are a nameless species of growth. I do not attach much +importance to the point, you understand. She has a chin of heartbreaking +fertility, that is all. + +Madame F--To return to what we were saying, how is it that the men who +are strongest, most courageous, most manly--soldiers, in fact--are +precisely those who have most beard? + +Madame H--That is nonsense, for then the pioneers would be braver than +the Generals; and, in any case, there is not in France, I am sure, a +General with as much beard as a Capuchin. You have never looked at a +Capuchin then? + +Madame F--Oh, yes! I have looked at one quite close. It is a rather +funny story. Fancy Clementine's cook having a brother a Capuchin--an +ex-jeweller, a very decent man. In consequence of misfortunes in +business--it was in 1848, business was at a stand-still--in short, +he lost his senses--no, he did not lose his senses, but he threw himself +into the arms of Heaven. + +Madame H--Oh! I never knew that! When? Clementine-- + +Madame F--I was like you, I would not believe it, but one day Clementine +said to me: "Since you will not believe in my Capuchin, come and see me +tomorrow about three o'clock; he will be paying a visit to his sister. +Don't have lunch first; we will lunch together." Very good. I went the +next day with Louise, who absolutely insisted upon accompanying me, and I +found at Clementine's five or six ladies installed in the drawing-room +and laughing like madcaps. They had all come to see the Capuchin. +"Well," said I, as I went in, when they all began to make signs to me and +whisper, "Hush, hush!" He was in the kitchen. + +Madame H--And what was he like? + +Madame F--Oh! very nice, except his feet; you know how it always gives +one a chill to look at their feet; but, in short, he was very amiable. +He was sent for into the drawing-room, but he would not take anything +except a little biscuit and a glass of water, which took away our +appetites. He was very lively; told us that we were coquettes with our +little bonnets and our full skirts. He was very funny, always a little +bit of the jeweller at the bottom, but with plenty of good nature and +frankness. He imitated the buzzing of a fly for us; it was wonderful. +He also wanted to show us a little conjuring trick, but he needed two +corks for it, and unfortunately his sister could only find one. + +Madame H--No matter, I can not understand Clementine engaging a servant +like that. + +Madame F--Why? The brother is a guarantee. + +Madame H--Of morality, I don't say no; but it seems to me that a girl +like that can not be very discreet in her ways. + +Madame F--How do you make that out? + +Madame H--I don't know, I can not reason the matter out, but it seems to +me that it must be so, that is all, . . . besides, I should not like +to see a monk in my kitchen, close to the soup. Oh, mercy! no! + +Madame F--What a child you are! + +Madame H--That has nothing to do with religious feelings, my dear; I do +not attack any dogma. Ah! if I were to say, for instance--come now, if I +were to say, what now? + +Madame F--In point of fact, what really is dogma? + +Madame H--Well, it is what can not be attacked. Thus, for instance, +a thing that is evident, you understand me, is unassailable, . . . or +else it should be assailed, . . in short, it can not be attacked. That +is why it is monstrous to allow the Jewish religion and the Protestant +religion in France, because these religions can be assailed, for they +have no dogma. I give you this briefly, but in your prayer-book you will +find the list of dogmas. I am a rod of iron as regards dogmas. My +husband, who, as I said, has succeeded in inspiring me with doubts on +many matters--without imagining it, for he has never required anything of +me; I must do him that justice--but who, at any rate, has succeeded in +making me neglect many things belonging to religion, such as fasting, +vespers, sermons, . . . confession. + +Madame F--Confession! Oh! my dear, I should never have believed that. + +Madame H--It is in confidence, dear pet, that I tell you this. You will +swear never to speak of it? + +Madame F--Confession! Oh! yes, I swear it. Come here, and let me kiss +you. + +Madame H--You pity me, do you not? + +Madame F--I can not pity you too much, for I am absolutely in the same +position. + +Madame H--You, too! Good heavens! how I love you. What can one do, eh? +Must one not introduce some plan of conciliation into the household, +sacrifice one's belief a little to that of one's husband? + +Madame F--No doubt. For instance, how would you have me go to high mass, +which is celebrated at my parish church at eleven o'clock exactly? That +is just our breakfast time. Can I let my husband breakfast alone? He +would never hinder me from going to high mass, he has said so a thousand +times, only he has always added, "When you want to go to mass during +breakfast time, I only ask one thing--it is to give me notice the day +before, so that I may invite some friends to keep me company." + +Madame H--But only fancy, pet, our two husbands could not be more alike +if they were brothers. Leon has always said, "My dear little chicken--" + +Madame F--Ha! ha! ha! + +Madame H--Yes, that is his name for me; you know how lively he is. He +has always said to me, then, "My dear little chicken, I am not a man to +do violence to your opinions, but in return give way to me as regards +some of your pious practices." I only give you the mere gist of it; it +was said with a thousand delicacies, which I suppress. And I have agreed +by degrees, . . . so that, while only paying very little attention to +the outward observances of religion, I have remained, as I told you, a +bar of iron as regards dogmas. Oh! as to that, I would not give way an +inch, a hair-breadth, and Leon is the first to tell me that I am right. +After all, dogma is everything; practice, well, what would you? If I +could bring Leon round, it would be quite another thing. How glad I am +to have spoken to you about all this. + +Madame F--Have we not been chattering? But it is half-past five, and I +must go and take my cinchona bark. Thirty minutes before meals, it is a +sacred duty. Will you come, pet? + +Madame H--Stop a moment, I have lost my thimble again and must find it. + + + + +ETEXT EDITOR'S BOOKMARKS: + +But she thinks she is affording you pleasure +Do not seek too much +First impression is based upon a number of trifles +Sometimes like to deck the future in the garments of the past +The heart requires gradual changes + + + + +End of this Project Gutenberg Etext of TMonsieur, Madame, and Bebe, v2 +by Gustave Droz + diff --git a/3924.zip b/3924.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..c43c26a --- /dev/null +++ b/3924.zip diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. 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