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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of In the Track of the Bookworm, by Irving Browne
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: In the Track of the Bookworm
+
+Author: Irving Browne
+
+Release Date: July 17, 2011 [EBook #36764]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK IN THE TRACK OF THE BOOKWORM ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by The Online Distributed Proofreading Team at
+http://www.pgdp.net (This file was produced from images
+generously made available by The Internet Archive.)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+  IN THE TRACK OF THE BOOK-WORM
+  by Irving Browne: thoughts,
+  fancies and gentle gibes on Collecting and
+  Collectors by one of them.
+
+
+  DONE INTO A BOOK AT THE ROYCROFT
+  PRINTING SHOP AT EAST AURORA,
+  NEW YORK, U. S. A.
+  MDCCCXCVII
+
+
+
+
+  Copyrighted by
+  The Roycroft Printing Shop
+  1897
+
+
+
+
+Of this edition but five hundred and ninety copies were printed and types
+then distributed. Each copy is signed and numbered and this book is number
+173
+
+Irving Browne
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTERS.
+
+
+   1. Objects of Collection                          9
+
+   2. Who Have Collected                            11
+
+   3. Diverse Tastes                                18
+
+   4. The Size of Books                             21
+
+   5. Binding                                       25
+
+   6. Paper                                         32
+
+   7. Women as Collectors                           36
+
+   8. The Illustrator                               47
+
+   9. Book-Plates                                   66
+
+  10. The Book-Auctioneer                           73
+
+  11. The Book-Seller                               77
+
+  12. The Public Librarian                          84
+
+  13. Does Book Collecting Pay                      88
+
+  14. The Book-Worm's Faults                        93
+
+  15. Poverty as a Means of Enjoyment              103
+
+  16. The Arrangement of Books                     105
+
+  17. Enemies of Books                             108
+
+  18. Library Companions                           121
+
+  19. The Friendship of Books                      133
+
+
+
+
+BALLADS.
+
+
+   1. How a Bibliomaniac Binds his Books            26
+
+   2. The Bibliomaniac's Assignment of Binders      28
+
+   3. The Failing Books                             33
+
+   4. Suiting Paper to Subject                      34
+
+   5. The Sentimental Chambermaid                   37
+
+   6. A Woman's Idea of a Library                   42
+
+   7. The Shy Portraits                             54
+
+   8. The Snatchers                                 71
+
+   9. The Stolid Auctioneer                         75
+
+  10. The Prophetic Book                            80
+
+  11. The Book-Seller                               82
+
+  12. The Public Librarian                          85
+
+  13. The Book-Worm does not care for Nature        97
+
+  14. How I go A-Fishing                            99
+
+  15. The Book-Thief                               111
+
+  16. The Smoke Traveler                           112
+
+  17. The Fire in the Library                      116
+
+  18. Cleaning the Library                         117
+
+  19. Ode to Omar                                  119
+
+  20. My Dog                                       121
+
+  21. My Clocks                                    123
+
+  22. A Portrait                                   125
+
+  23. My Schoolmate                                126
+
+  24. My Shingle                                   129
+
+  25. Solitaire                                    130
+
+  26. My Friends the Books                         133
+
+
+
+
+  To book-worms all, of high or low degree,
+    Whate'er of madness be their stages,
+  And just as well unknown as known to me,
+    I dedicate these trifling pages,
+  In hope that when they turn them o'er
+  They will not find the Track a bore.
+
+
+
+
+The Track of the Book-Worm.
+
+
+
+
+I.
+
+OBJECTS OF COLLECTION.
+
+
+Philosophers have made various and ingenious but incomplete attempts to
+form a succinct definition of the animal, Man. At first thought it might
+seem that a perfect definition would be, an animal who makes collections.
+But one must remember that the magpie does this. Yet this definition is as
+good as any, and comes nearer exactness than most. What has not the
+animal Man collected? Clocks, watches, snuff-boxes, canes, fans, laces,
+precious stones, china, coins, paper money, spoons, prints, paintings,
+tulips, orchids, hens, horses, match-boxes, postal stamps, miniatures,
+violins, show-bills, play-bills, swords, buttons, shoes, china slippers,
+spools, birds, butterflies, beetles, saddles, skulls, wigs, lanterns,
+book-plates, knockers, crystal balls, shells, penny toys, death-masks,
+tea-pots, autographs, rugs, armour, pipes, arrow heads, locks of hair and
+key locks, and hats (Jules Verne's "Tale of a Hat"), these are some of the
+most prominent subjects in search of which the animal Man runs up and down
+the earth, and spends time and money without scruple or stint. But all
+these curious objects of search fall into insignificance when compared
+with the ancient, noble and useful passion for collecting books. One of
+the wisest of the human race said, the only earthly immortality is in
+writing a book; and the desire to accumulate these evidences of earthly
+immortality needs no defense among cultivated men.
+
+
+
+
+II.
+
+WHO HAVE COLLECTED BOOKS.
+
+
+The mania for book-collecting is by no means a modern disease, but has
+existed ever since there were books to gather, and has infected many of
+the wisest and most potent names in history. Euripides is ridiculed by
+Aristophanes in "The Frogs" for collecting books. Of the Roman emperor,
+Gordian, who flourished (or rather did not flourish, because he was slain
+after a reign of thirty-six days) in the third century, Gibbon says,
+"twenty-two acknowledged concubines and a library of sixty thousand
+volumes attested the variety of his inclinations." This combination of
+uxorious and literary tastes seems to have existed in another monarch of a
+later period--Henry VIII.--the seeming disproportion of whose expenditure
+of 10,800 pounds for jewels in three years, during which he spent but 100
+pounds for books and binding, is explained by the fact that he was
+indebted for the contents of his libraries to the plunder of monasteries.
+Henry printed a few copies of his book against Luther on vellum. Cicero,
+who possessed a superb library, especially rich in Greek, at his villa in
+Tusculum, thus describes his favorite acquisitions: "Books to quicken the
+intelligence of youth, delight age, decorate prosperity, shelter and
+solace us in adversity, bring enjoyment at home, befriend us out-of-doors,
+pass the night with us, travel with us, go into the country with us."
+
+Petrarch, who collected books not simply for his own gratification, but
+aspired to become the founder of a permanent library at Venice, gave his
+books to the Church of St. Mark; but the greater part of them perished
+through neglect, and only a small part remains. Boccaccio, anticipating an
+early death, offered his library to Petrarch, his dear friend, on his own
+terms, to insure its preservation, and the poet promised to care for the
+collection in case he survived Boccaccio; but the latter, outliving
+Petrarch, bequeathed his books to the Augustinians of Florence, and some
+of them are still shown to visitors in the Laurentinian Library. From
+Boccaccio's own account of his collection, one must believe his books
+quite inappropriate for a monastic library, and the good monks probably
+instituted an auto da fe for most of them, like that which befell the
+knightly romances in "Don Quixote." Perhaps the naughty story-teller
+intended the donation as a covert satire. The walls of the room which
+formerly contained Montaigne's books, and is at this day exhibited to
+pilgrims, are covered with inscriptions burnt in with branding-irons on
+the beams and rafters by the eccentric and delightful essayist. The
+author of "Ivanhoe" adorned his magnificent library with suits of superb
+armor, and luxuriated in demonology and witchcraft. The caustic Swift was
+in the habit of annotating his books, and writing on the fly-leaves a
+summary opinion of the author's merits; whatever else he had, he owned no
+Shakespeare, nor can any reference to him be found in the nineteen volumes
+of Swift's works. Military men seem always to have had a passion for
+books. To say nothing of the literary and rhetorical tastes of C�sar, "the
+foremost man of all time," Frederick the Great had libraries at Sans
+Souci, Potsdam, and Berlin, in which he arranged the volumes by classes
+without regard to size. Thick volumes he rebound in sections for more
+convenient use, and his favorite French authors he sometimes caused to be
+reprinted in compact editions to his taste. The great Conde inherited a
+valuable library from his father, and enlarged and loved it. Marlborough
+had twenty-five books on vellum, all earlier than 1496. The hard-fighting
+Junot had a vellum library which sold in London for 1,400 pounds, while
+his great master was not too busy in conquering Europe not only to solace
+himself in his permanent libraries, and in books which he carried with him
+in his expeditions, but to project and actually commence the printing of a
+camp library of duodecimo volumes, without margins, and in thin covers, to
+embrace some three thousand volumes, and which he had designed to complete
+in six years by employing one hundred and twenty compositors and
+twenty-five editors, at an outlay of about 163,000 pounds. St. Helena
+destroyed this scheme. It is curious to note that Napoleon despised
+Voltaire as heartily as Frederick admired him, but gave Fielding and Le
+Sage places among his traveling companions; while the Bibliomaniac appears
+in his direction to his librarian: "I will have fine editions and handsome
+bindings. I am rich enough for that." The main thing that shakes one's
+confidence in the correctness of his literary taste is that he was fond of
+"Ossian." Julius C�sar also formed a traveling library of forty-four
+little volumes, contained in an oak case measuring 16 by 11 by 3 inches,
+covered with leather. The books are bound in white vellum, and consist of
+history, philosophy, theology, and poetry, in Greek and Latin. The
+collector was Sir Julius C�sar, of England, and this exquisite and unique
+collection is in the British Museum. The books were all printed between
+1591 and 1616.
+
+Southey brought together fourteen thousand volumes, the most valuable
+collection which had up to that time been acquired by any man whose means
+and estate lay, as he once said of himself, in his inkstand. Time fails me
+to speak of Erasmus, De Thou, Grotius, Goethe, Bodley; Hans Sloane, whose
+private library of fifty thousand volumes was the beginning of that of the
+British Museum; the Cardinal Borromeo, who founded the Ambrosian Library
+at Milan with his own forty thousand volumes, and the other great names
+entitled to the description of Bibliomaniac. We must not forget Sir
+Richard Whittington, of feline fame, who gave 400 pounds to found the
+library of Christ's Hospital, London.
+
+The fair sex, good and bad, have been lovers of books or founders of
+libraries; witness the distinguished names of Lady Jane Gray, Catherine De
+Medicis, and Diane de Poictiers.
+
+It only remains to speak of the great opium-eater, who was a sort of
+literary ghoul, famed for borrowing books and never returning them, and
+whose library was thus made up of the enforced contributions of
+friends--for who would have dared refuse the loan of a book to Thomas de
+Quincey? The name of the unhappy man would have descended to us with that
+of the incendiary of the Temple of Diana at Ephesus. But the great Thomas
+was recklessly careless and slovenly in his use of books; and Burton, in
+the "Book-hunter," tells us that "he once gave in copy written on the
+edges of a tall octavo 'Somnium Scipionis,' and as he did not obliterate
+the original matter, the printer was rather puzzled, and made a funny
+jumble between the letter-press Latin and the manuscript English." I
+seriously fear that with him must be ranked the gentle Elia, who said: "A
+book reads the better which is our own, and has been so long known to us
+that we know the topography of its blots and dog's ears, and can trace the
+dirt in it to having read it at tea with buttered muffins, or over a pipe,
+which I think is the maximum." And yet a great degree of slovenliness may
+be excused in Charles because, according to Leigh Hunt, he once gave a
+kiss to an old folio Chapman's "Homer," and when asked how he knew his
+books one from the other, for hardly any were lettered, he answered: "How
+does a shepherd know his sheep?"
+
+The love of books displayed by the sensual Henry and the pugnacious Junot
+is not more remarkable than that of the epicurean and sumptuous Lucullus,
+to whom Pompey, when sick, having been directed by his physician to eat a
+thrush for dinner, and learning from his servants that in summer-time
+thrushes were not to be found anywhere but in Lucullus' fattening coops,
+refused to be indebted for his meal, observing: "So if Lucullus had not
+been an epicure, Pompey had not lived." Of him the veracious Plutarch
+says: "His furnishing a library, however, deserved praise and record, for
+he collected very many and choice manuscripts; and the use they were put
+to was even more magnificent than the purchase, the library being always
+open, and the walks and reading rooms about it free to all Greeks, whose
+delight it was to leave their other occupations and hasten thither as to
+the habitation of the Muses."
+
+It is not recorded that Socrates collected books--his wife probably
+objected--but we have his word for it that he loved them. He did not love
+the country, and the only thing that could tempt him thither was a book.
+Acknowledging this to Ph�drus he says:
+
+"Very true, my good friend; and I hope that you will excuse me when you
+hear the reason, which is, that I am a lover of knowledge, and the men who
+dwell in the city are my teachers, and not the trees or the country.
+Though I do indeed believe that you have found a spell with which to draw
+me out of the city into the country, like a hungry cow before whom a bough
+or a bunch of fruit is waved. For only hold up before me in like manner a
+book, and you may lead me all round Attica, and over the wide world. And
+now having arrived, I intend to lie down, and do you choose any posture in
+which you can read best."
+
+
+
+
+III.
+
+DIVERSE TASTES.
+
+
+It is fortunate for the harmony of book-collectors that they do not all
+desire the same thing, just as it was fortunate for their young State that
+all the Romans did not want the same Sabine woman. Otherwise the Helenic
+battle of the books would be fiercer than it is. Thus there are
+bibliomaniacs who reprint rare books from their own libraries in limited
+numbers; authors, like Walpole, who print their own works, and whose fame
+as printers is better deserved than their reputation as writers; like
+Thackeray, who design the illustrations for their own romances, or, like
+Astor, who procure a single copy of their novel to be illustrated at
+lavish expense by artists; amateurs who bind their own books; lunatics who
+yearn for books wholly engraved, or printed only on one side of the leaf,
+or Greek books wholly in capitals, or others in the italic letter; or
+black-letter fanciers; or tall copy men; or rubricists, missal men, or
+first edition men, or incunabulists.
+
+One seeks only ancient books; another limited editions; another those
+privately printed; a fourth wants nothing but presentation copies; yet
+another only those that have belonged to famous men, and still another
+illustrated or illuminated books. There is a perfectly rabid and incurable
+class, of whom the most harmless are devoted to pamphlets; another,
+rather more dangerous, to incorrect or suppressed editions; and a third,
+stark mad, to play-bills and portraits. One patronizes the drama, one
+poetry, one the fine arts, another books about books and their collectors;
+and a very recherche class devote themselves to works on playing-cards,
+angling, magic, or chess, emblems, dances of death, or the jest books and
+faceti�. Finally, there are those unhappy beings who run up and down for
+duplicates, searching for every edition of their favorite authors. In very
+recent days there has arisen a large class who demand the first editions
+of popular novelists like Dickens, Thackeray and Hawthorne, and will pay
+large prices for these issues which have no value except that of rarity. I
+can quite understand the enthusiasm of the collector over the beautiful
+first editions of the Greek and Latin classics, or for the first "Paradise
+Lost," or even for the ugly first folio "Shakespeare," and why he should
+prefer the comparatively rude first Walton's Angler to Pickering's
+edition, the handsomest of this century, with its monumental title page.
+But why a first edition of a popular novel should be more desirable than a
+late one, which is usually the more elegant, I confess I cannot
+understand. It is one of those things which, like the mystery of religion,
+we must take on trust. So when a bookseller tells me that a copy of the
+first issue of "The Scarlet Letter" has sold for seventy-five dollars,
+and that a copy of the second, with the same date, but put out six months
+later, is worth only seventy-five cents, I open my eyes but not my purse,
+especially when I consider that the second is greatly superior to the
+first on account of its famous preface of apology, and when I read of some
+one's bidding $1875 for a copy of Poe's worthless "Tamerlane," I am
+flattered by the reflection that there is one man in the world whom I
+believe to be eighteen hundred and seventy-five times as great a fool as I
+am!
+
+
+
+
+IV.
+
+THE SIZE OF BOOKS.
+
+
+Were I a despotic ruler of the universe I would make it a serious offense
+to publish a book larger than royal octavo. Books should be made to read,
+or at all events to look at, and in this view comfort and ease should be
+consulted. Any one who has ever undertaken to read a huge quarto or folio
+will sympathize with this view. The older and lazier the Book-Worm grows
+the more he longs for little books, which he can hold in one hand without
+getting a cramp, or at least support with arms in an elbow chair without
+fatigue. Darwin remorselessly split big books in two. Mr. Slater says in
+"Book Collecting:" "When the library at Sion College took fire the
+attendants, at the risk of their lives, rescued a pile of books from the
+flames, and it is said that the librarian wept when he found that the
+porters had taken it for granted that the value of a book was in exact
+proportion to its size." Few of us, I suspect, ever read our family Bible,
+and all of us probably groan when we lift out the unabridged dictionary.
+The "Century Dictionary" is a luxury because it is published in small and
+convenient parts. I cannot conceive any good in a big book except that the
+ladies may use it to press flowers or mosses in, or the nurses may put it
+in a chair to sit the baby on at table. I have heard of a gentleman who
+inherited a mass of folio volumes and arranged them as shelves for his
+smaller treasures, and of another who arranged his 12-mos on a stand made
+up of the seventeen volumes of Pinkerton's "Voyages" and Denon's "Egypt"
+for shelves. What reader would not prefer a dainty little Elzevir to the
+huge folio, C�sar's "Commentaries," even with the big bull in it, and the
+wicker idol full of burning human victims? What can be more pleasing than
+the modern Quantin edition of the classics? Or, to speak of a popular
+book, take the "Pastels in Prose," the most exquisite book for the price
+ever known in the history of printing. The small book ought however to
+be easily legible. The health and comfort of the human eye should be
+consulted in the size of the type. Nothing can be worse in this regard
+than the Pickering diamond classics, if meant to be read; and it seems
+that there are too many of them to be intended as mere curiosities of
+printing. Let us approve the exit of the folio and the quarto, and applaud
+the modern tendency toward little and handy volumes. Large paper however
+is a worthy distinction when the subject is worth the distinction and the
+edition is not too large. Nothing raises the gorge of the true Book-Worm
+more than to see an issue on large paper of a row of histories, for
+example; and the very worst instance conceivable was a large paper
+Webster's "Unabridged Dictionary" issued some years ago. The book thus
+distinguished ought to be a classic, or peculiar for elegance, never a
+series, or stereotyped, the first struck off, and the issue ought not to
+be more than from fifty to one hundred copies; any larger issue is not
+worth the extra margin bestowed, and no experienced buyer will tolerate
+it. But if all these conditions are observed, the large paper copies
+bear the same relation to the small that a proof before letters of a print
+holds to the other impressions. Large margins are very pleasant in a
+library as well as in Wall Street, and much more apt to be permanent.
+There are some favorite books of which the possessor longs in vain for a
+large copy, as for instance, the Pickering "Walton and Cotton."
+
+A great deal of fun is made of the Book-Worm because of his desire for
+large paper and of his insistence on uncut edges, but his reasons are
+sound and his taste is unimpeachable. The tricks of the book-trade to
+catch the inexperienced with the bait of large paper are very amusing.
+"Strictly limited" to so many copies for England and so many for America,
+say a thousand in all, or else the number is not stated, and always
+described as an edition de luxe, and its looks are always very repulsive.
+But the bait is eagerly bitten at by a shoal of beings anxious to get one
+of these rarities--a class to one of whom I once found it necessary to
+explain that "uncut edges" does not mean leaves not cut open, and that he
+would not injure the value of his book by being able to read it, and was
+not bound to peep in surreptitiously like a maid-servant at a door "on
+the jar." I once knew a satirical Book-Worm who issued a pamphlet, "one
+hundred copies on large paper, none on small." There is no just
+distinction in an ugly large-paper issue, and sometimes it is not nearly
+so beautiful as the small, especially when the latter has uncut edges. The
+independence of the collector who prefers the small in such circumstances
+is to be commended and imitated.
+
+Too great inequality in uncut edges is also to be shunned as an ugliness.
+It seems that some French books are printed on paper of two different
+sizes, the effect of which is very grotesque, and the device is a catering
+to a very crude and extravagant taste.
+
+
+
+
+V.
+
+BINDING.
+
+
+The binding of books for several centuries has held the dignity of a fine
+art, quite independent of printing. This has been demonstrated by
+exhibitions in this country and abroad. But every collector ought to
+observe fitness in the binding which he procures to be executed. True
+fitness prevails in most old and fine bindings; seldom was a costly garb
+bestowed on a book unworthy of it. But in many a luxurious library we see
+a modern binding fit for a unique or rare book given to one that is
+comparatively worthless or common. Not to speak of bindings that are real
+works of art, many collectors go astray in dressing lumber in purple and
+fine linen--putting full levant morocco on blockhead histories and such
+stuff that perishes in the not using. It is a sad spectacle to behold a
+unique binding wasted on a book of no more value than a backgammon board.
+There are of course not a great many of us who can afford unique bindings,
+but those who cannot should at least observe propriety and fitness in this
+regard, and draw the line severely between full dress and demi-toilette,
+and keep a sharp eye to appropriateness of color. I have known several men
+who bound their books all alike. Nothing could be worse except one who
+should bind particular subjects in special styles, pace Mr. Ellwanger,
+who, in "The Story of My House," advises the Book-Worm to "bind the poets
+in yellow or orange, books on nature in olive, the philosophers in blue,
+the French classics in red," etc. I am curious to know what color this
+pleasant writer would adopt for the binding of his books by military men,
+such for example as "Major Walpole's Anecdotes." (p. 262).
+
+Ambrose Fermin Didot recommended binding the "Iliad" in red and the
+"Odyssey" in blue, for the Greek rhapsodists wore a scarlet cloak when
+they recited the former and a blue one when they recited the latter. The
+churchmen he would clothe in violet, cardinals in scarlet, philosophers in
+black.
+
+I have imagined
+
+  HOW A BIBLIOMANIAC BINDS HIS BOOKS.
+
+  I'd like my favorite books to bind
+    So that their outward dress
+  To every bibliomaniac's mind
+    Their contents should express.
+
+  Napoleon's life should glare in red,
+    John Calvin's gloom in blue;
+  Thus they would typify bloodshed
+    And sour religion's hue.
+
+  The prize-ring record of the past
+    Must be in blue and black;
+  While any color that is fast
+    Would do for Derby track.
+
+  The Popes in scarlet well may go;
+    In jealous green, Othello;
+  In gray, Old Age of Cicero,
+    And London Cries in yellow.
+
+  My Walton should his gentle art
+    In Salmon best express,
+  And Penn and Fox the friendly heart
+    In quiet drab confess.
+
+  Statistics of the lumber trade
+    Should be embraced in boards,
+  While muslin for the inspired Maid
+    A fitting garb affords.
+
+  Intestine wars I'd clothe in vellum,
+    While pig-skin Bacon grasps,
+  And flat romances, such as "Pelham,"
+    Should stand in calf with clasps.
+
+  Blind-tooled should be blank verse and rhyme
+    Of Homer and of Milton;
+  But Newgate Calendar of Crime
+    I'd lavishly dab gilt on.
+
+  The edges of a sculptor's life
+    May fitly marbled be,
+  But sprinkle not, for fear of strife,
+    A Baptist history.
+
+  Crimea's warlike facts and dates
+    Of fragrant Russia smell;
+  The subjugated Barbary States
+    In crushed Morocco dwell.
+
+  But oh! that one I hold so dear
+    Should be arrayed so cheap
+  Gives me a qualm; I sadly fear
+    My Lamb must be half-sheep.
+
+No doubt a Book-Worm so far gone as this could invent stricter analogies
+and make even the binder fit the book.
+
+So we should have
+
+  THE BIBLIOMANIAC'S ASSIGNMENT OF BINDERS.
+
+  If I could bring the dead to day,
+    I would your soul with wonder fill
+  By pointing out a novel way
+    For bibliopegistic skill.
+
+  My Walton, Trautz should take in hand,
+    Or else I'd give him o'er to Hering;
+  Matthews should make the Gospels stand
+    A solemn warning to the erring.
+
+  The history of the Inquisition,
+    With all its diabolic train
+  Of cruelty and superstition,
+    Should fitly be arrayed by Payne.
+
+  A book of dreams by Bedford clad,
+    A Papal history by De Rome,
+  Should make the sense of fitness glad
+    In every bibliomaniac's home.
+
+  As our first mother's folly cost
+    Her sex so dear, and makes men grieve,
+  So Milton's plaint of Eden lost
+    Would be appropriate to Eve.
+
+  Hayday would make "One Summer" be
+    Doubly attractive to the view;
+  While General Wolfe's biography
+    Should be the work of Pasdeloup.
+
+  For lives of dwarfs, like Thomas Thumb,
+    Petit's the man by nature made,
+  And when Munchasen strikes us dumb
+    It is by means of Gascon aid.
+
+  Thus would I the great binders blend
+    In harmony with work before 'em,
+  And so Riviere I would commend
+    To Turner's "Liber Fluviorum."
+
+After all, whether one can afford a three-hundred or a three-dollar
+binding, the gentle Elia has said the last word about fitness of bindings
+when he observed: "To be strong-backed and neat-bound is the desideratum
+of a volume; magnificence comes after. This, when it can be afforded, is
+not to be lavished on all kinds of books indiscriminately.
+
+"Where we know that a book is at once both good and rare--where the
+individual is almost the species,
+
+  'We know not where is that Prometian torch
+  That can its light relumine;'
+
+"Such a book for instance as the 'Life of the Duke of Newcastle' by his
+Duchess--no casket is rich enough, no casing sufficiently durable, to
+honor and keep safe such a jewel.
+
+"To view a well arranged assortment of block-headed encyclopoedias
+(Anglicana or Metropolitanas), set out in an array of Russia and Morocco,
+when a tithe of that good leather would comfortably reclothe my shivering
+folios, would renovate Parcelsus himself, and enable old Raymond Lully to
+look like himself again in the world. I never see these impostors but I
+long to strip them and warm my ragged veterans in their spoils."
+
+There spoke the true Book-Worm. What a pity he could not have sold a part
+of his good sense and fine taste to some of the affluent collectors of
+this period!
+
+Doubtless an experienced binder could give some amusing examples of
+mistakes in indorsing books with their names. One remains in my memory. A
+French binder, entrusted with a French translation of "Uncle Tom's Cabin,"
+in two volumes, put "L'Oncle" on both, and numbered them "Tome 1," "Tome
+2." Charles Cowden-Clarke tells of his having ordered Leigh Hunt's poems
+entitled "Foliage" to be bound in green, and how the book came home in
+blue. That would answer for the "blue grass" region of Kentucky. I have
+no patience with those disgusting realists who bind books in human or
+snake skin. In his charming book on the Law Reporters, Mr. Wallace says of
+Desaussures' South Carolina Reports: "When these volumes are found in
+their original binding most persons, I think, are struck with its
+peculiarity. The cause of it is, I believe, that it was done by negroes."
+What the "peculiarity" is he does not disclose. But book-binding seems to
+be an unwonted occupation for negro slaves. It was not often that they
+beat skins, although their own skins were frequently beaten.
+
+
+
+
+VI.
+
+PAPER.
+
+
+It is a serious question whether the art of printing has been improved
+except in facility. Is not the first printed book still the finest ever
+printed? But in one point I am certain that the moderns have fallen away,
+at least in the production of cheap books, and that is in the quality and
+finish of the paper. Not to speak of injurious devices to make the book
+heavy, the custom of calendering the paper, or making it smooth and shiny,
+practised by some important publishers, is bad for the eyes, and the
+result is not pleasant to look at. It is like the glare of the glass over
+the framed print. It is said to be necessary to the production of the
+modern "process" pictures. Even here however there is a just mean, for
+some of the modern paper is absurdly rough, and very difficult for a good
+impression of the types. Modern paper however has one advantage: Mr.
+Blades, in his pleasant "Enemies of Books," tells us "that the worm will
+not touch it," it is so adulterated. One hint I would give the
+publishers--allow us a few more fly leaves, so that we may paste in
+newspaper cuttings, and make memoranda and suggestions.
+
+It is predicted by some that our nineteenth century books--at least those
+of the last third--will not last; that the paper and ink are far inferior
+to those of preceding centuries, and that the destroying tooth of time
+will work havoc with them. No doubt the modern paper and the modern ink
+are inferior to those of the earlier ages of printing, when making a book
+was a fine art and a work of conscience, but whether the modern
+productions of the press will ultimately fade and crumble is a question to
+be determined only by a considerable lapse of time, which probably no one
+living will be qualified to pronounce upon. Take for what they are worth
+my sentiments respecting
+
+  THE FAILING BOOKS.
+
+  They say our books will disappear,
+    That ink will fade and paper rot--
+  I sha'n't be here,
+    So I don't care a jot.
+
+  The best of them I know by heart,
+    As for the rest they make me tired;
+  The viler part
+    May well be fired.
+
+  Oh, what a hypocritic show
+    Will be the bibliomaniac's hoard!
+  Cheat as hollow
+    As a backgammon board.
+
+  Just think of Lamb without his stuffing,
+    And the iconoclastic Howells,
+  Who spite of puffing
+    Is destitute of bowels.
+
+  'Twould make me laugh to see the stare
+    Of mousing bibliomaniac fond
+  At pages bare
+    As Overreach's bond.
+
+  Those empty titles will displease
+    The earnest student seeking knowledge,--
+  Barren degrees,
+    Like these of Western College.
+
+  That common stuff, "Excelsior,"
+    In poetry so lacking,
+  I care not for--
+    'Tis only fit for packing.
+
+It has occurred to me that publishers might appeal to bibliomaniacal
+tastes by paying a little more attention to their paper, and I have thrown
+a few suggestions on this point into rhyme, so that they may be readily
+committed to memory:
+
+  SUITING PAPER TO SUBJECT.
+
+  Printers the paper should adapt
+    Unto the subject of the book,
+  Thus making buyers wonder-rapt
+    Before they at the contents look.
+
+  Thus Beerbohm's learned book on Eggs
+    On a laid paper he should print,
+  But Motley's "Dutch Republic" begs
+    Rice paper should its matter hint.
+
+  That curious problem of what Man
+    Inhabited the Iron Mask
+  Than Whatman paper never can
+    A more suggestive medium ask.
+
+  The "Book of Dates," by Mr. Haydon,
+    Should be on paper calendered;
+  That Swift on Servants be arrayed on
+    A hand-made paper is inferred.
+
+  Though angling-books have never been
+    Accustomed widely to appear
+  On fly-paper, 'twould be no sin
+    To have them wormed from front to rear.
+
+  The good that authors thus may reap
+    I'll not pursue to tedium,
+  But hint, for books on raising sheep
+    Buckram is just the medium.
+
+
+
+
+VII.
+
+WOMEN AS COLLECTORS.
+
+
+Women collect all sorts of things except books. To them the book-sense
+seems to be denied, and it is difficult for them to appreciate its
+existence in men. To be sure, there have been a few celebrated
+book-collectors among the fair sex, but they have usually been rather
+reprehensible ladies, like Diane de Poictiers and Madame Pompadour.
+Probably Aspasia was a collector of MSS. Lady Jane Grey seems to have been
+a virtuous exception, and she was cruelly "cropped." I am told that there
+are a few women now-a-days who collect books, and only a few weeks ago a
+lady read, before a woman's club in Chicago, a paper on the Collection and
+Adornment of Books, for which occasion a fair member of the club solicited
+me to write her something appropriate to read, which of course I was glad
+to do. But this was in Chicago, where the women go in for culture. In
+thirty years' haunting of the book-shops and print-shops of New York, I
+have never seen a woman catching a cold in her head by turning over the
+large prints, nor soiling her dainty gloves by handling the dirty old
+books. Women have been depicted in literature in many different
+occupations, situations and pleasures, but in all the literature that I
+have read I can recall only one instance in which she is imagined a
+book-buyer. This is in "The Sentimental Journey," and in celebrating the
+unique instance let me rise to a nobler strain and sing a song of
+
+  THE SENTIMENTAL CHAMBERMAID.
+
+  When you're in Paris, do not fail
+    To seek the Quai de Conti,
+  Where in the roguish Parson's tale,
+    Upon the river front he
+  Bespoke the pretty chambermaid
+  Too innocent to be afraid.
+
+  On this book-seller's mouldy stall,
+    Crammed full of volumes musty,
+  I made a bibliophilic call
+    And saw, in garments rusty,
+  The ancient vender, queer to view,
+  In breeches, buckles, and a queue.
+
+  And while to find that famous book,
+    "Les Egaremens du Coeur,"
+  I dilligently undertook,
+    I suddenly met her;
+  She held a small green satin purse,
+  And spite of Time looked none the worse.
+
+  I told her she was known to Fame
+    Through ministerial Mentor,
+  And though I had not heard her name,
+    That this should not prevent her
+  From listening to the homage due
+  To one to Sentiment so true.
+
+  She blushed; I bowed in courtly fashion;
+    In pockets of my trousers
+  Then sought a crown to vouch my passion,
+    Without intent to rouse hers;
+  But I had left my purse 'twould seem--
+  And then I woke--'twas but a dream!
+
+  The heart will wander, never doubt,
+    Though waking faith it keep;
+  That is exceptionally stout
+    Which strays but in its sleep;
+  And hearts must always turn to her
+    Who loved, "Les Egaremens du Coeur."
+
+M. Uzanne, in "The Book-Hunter in Paris," avers that "the woman of fashion
+never goes book-hunting," and he puts the aphorism in italics. He also
+says that the occasional woman at the book-stalls, "if by chance she wants
+a book, tries to bargain for it as if it were a lobster or a fowl." Also
+that the book-stall keepers are always watchful of the woman with an
+ulster, a water-proof, or a muff. These garments are not always impervious
+to books, it seems.
+
+The imitative efforts of women at "extra-illustrating" are usually limited
+to buying a set of photographs at Rome and sticking them into the cracks
+of "The Marble Faun," and giving it away to a friend as a marked favor.
+Poor Hawthorne! he would wriggle in his grave if he could see his fair
+admirers doing this. Mr. Blades certainly ought to have included women
+among the enemies of books. They generally regard the husband's or
+father's expenditure on books as so much spoil of their gowns and jewels.
+We book-men are up to all the tricks of getting the books into the house
+without their knowing it. What joy and glee when we successfully smuggle
+in a parcel from the express, right under our wife's nose, while she is
+busy talking scandal to another woman in the drawing-room! The good
+creatures make us positively dishonest and endanger our eternal welfare.
+How we "hustle around" in their absence, when the embargo is temporarily
+raised; and when the new purchases are detected, how we pretend that they
+are old, and wonder that they have not seen them before, and rattle away
+in a fevered, embarrassed manner about the scarcity and value of the
+surreptitious purchases, and how meanly conscious we are all the time that
+the pretense is unavailing and the fair despots see right through us.
+God has given them an instinct that is more than a match for our
+acknowledged superior intellect. And the good wife smiles quietly but
+satirically, and says, in the form in that case made and provided, "My
+dear, you'll certainly ruin yourself buying books!" with a sigh that
+agitates a very costly diamond necklace reposing on her shapely bosom; or
+she archly shakes at us a warning finger all aglow with ruby and sapphire,
+which she has bought on installments out of the house allowance. Fortunate
+for us if the library is not condemned to be cleaned twice a year. These
+beloved objects ought to deny themselves a ring, or a horse, or a gown, or
+a ball now and then, to atone for their mankind's debauchery in books; but
+do they? They ought to encourage the Bibliomania, for it keeps their
+husbands out of mischief, away from "that horrid club," and safe at home
+of evenings. The Book-Worm is always a blameless being. He never has to
+hie to Canada as a refuge. He is "absolutely pure," like all the baking
+powders.
+
+The gentle Addison, in "The Spectator," thus described a woman's library:
+"The very sound of a lady's library gave me a great curiosity to see it;
+and as it was some time before the lady came to me, I had an opportunity
+of turning over a great many of her books, which were ranged together in a
+very beautiful order. At the end of the folios (which were finely bound
+and gilt) were great jars of china placed one above another in a very
+noble piece of architecture. The quartos were separated from the octavos
+by a pile of smaller vessels, which rose in a delightful pyramid. The
+octavos were bounded by tea-dishes of all shapes, colors, and sizes, which
+were so disposed on a wooden frame that they looked like one continued
+pillar indented with the finest strokes of sculpture, and stained with the
+greatest variety of dyes. That part of the library which was designed for
+the reception of plays and pamphlets, and other loose papers, was inclosed
+in a kind of square, consisting of one of the prettiest grotesque works
+that I ever saw, and made up of scaramouches, lions, mandarins, monkeys,
+trees, shells, and a thousand other odd figures in china ware. In the
+midst of the room was a little Japan table with a quire of gilt paper upon
+it, and on the paper a silver snuff-box made in shape of a little book. I
+found there were several other counterfeit books upon the upper shelves,
+which were carved in wood, and served only to fill up the number, like
+fagots in the muster of a regiment. I was wonderfully pleased with such a
+mixed kind of furniture as seemed very suitable both to the lady and the
+scholar, and did not know at first whether I should fancy myself in a
+grotto or in a library".
+
+If so great a favorite with the fair sex could say such satirical things
+of them, I may be permitted to have my own idea of
+
+  A WOMAN'S IDEA OF A LIBRARY.
+
+  I do not care so much for books,
+    But Libraries are all the style,
+  With fine "editions de luxe"
+    One's formal callers to beguile;
+
+  With neat dwarf cases round the walls,
+    And china teapots on the top,
+  The empty shelves concealed by falls
+    Of India silk that graceful drop.
+
+  A few rare etchings greet the view,
+    Like "Harmony" and "Harvest Moon;"
+  An artist's proof on satin too
+    By what's-his-name is quite a boon.
+
+  My print called "Jupiter and Jo"
+    Is very rarely seen, but then
+  Another copy I can show
+    Inscribed with "Jupiter and 10."
+
+  A fisher boy in marble stoops
+    On pedestal in window placed,
+  And one of Rogers' lovely groups
+    Is through the long lace curtains traced.
+
+  And then I make a painting lean
+    Upon a white and gilded easel,
+  Illustrating that famous scene
+    Of Joseph Andrews and Lady Teazle.
+
+  Of course my shelves the works reveal
+    Of Plutarch, Rollin, and of Tupper,
+  While Bowdler's Shakespeare and "Lucille"
+    Quite soothe one's spirits after supper.
+
+  And when I visited dear Rome
+    I bought a lot of photographs,
+  And had them mounted here at home,
+    And though my dreadful husband laughs,
+
+  I've put them in "The Marble Faun,"
+    And envious women vainly seek
+  At Scribner's shop, from early dawn,
+    To find a volume so unique.
+
+  And monthly here, in deep surmise,
+    Minerva's bust above us frowning,
+  A club of women analyze
+    The works of Ibsen and of Browning.
+
+In the charming romance, "Realmah," the noble African prince prescribes
+monogamy to his subjects, but he allows himself three wives; one is a
+State wife, to sit by his side on the throne, help him receive
+embassadors, and preside at court dinners; another a household wife, to
+rule the kitchen and the homely affairs of the palace; the third is a
+love-wife, to be cherished in his heart and bear him children. Why would
+it not be fair to the Book-Worm to concede him a Book-wife, who should
+understand and sympathize with him in his eccentricity, and who should
+care more for rare and beautiful books than for diamonds, laces, Easter
+bonnets and ten-button gloves?
+
+In regard to women's book-clubs, a recent writer, Mr. Edward Sanford
+Martin, in "Windfalls of Observation," observes: "If a man wants to read a
+book he buys it, and if he likes it he buys six more copies and gives (not
+all the same day, of course) to six women whose intelligence he respects.
+But if a club of fifteen girls determine to read a book, do they buy
+fifteen copies? No. Do they buy five copies? No. Do they buy--No, they
+don't buy at all; they borrow a copy. It doesn't lie in womankind to spend
+money for books unless they are meant to be a gift for some man." Mr.
+Martin is a little too hard here, for I have been told of such clubs which
+sometimes bought one copy. To be sure they always bully the bookseller
+into letting them have it at cost on account of the probable benefit to
+his trade. But it is true that no normally organized woman will forego a
+dollar's worth of ribbon or gloves for a dollar's worth of book. I have
+sometimes read aloud to a number of women while they were sewing, but I do
+it no more, for just as I got to a point where you ought to be able to
+hear a pin drop, I always have heard some woman whisper, "Lend me your
+eighty cotton." A story was told me of the first meeting of a Browning
+Club in a large city in Ohio. My informant was a young lady from the East,
+who was present, and my readers can safely rely on the correctness of the
+narration. The club was composed of young ladies from sixteen to
+twenty-five years of age, all of the "first families." It was thought best
+to take an easy poem for the first meeting, and so one of them read aloud,
+"The Last Ride Together". After the reading there was a moment's
+silence, and then one observed that she would like to know whether they
+took that ride on horseback or in a "buggy." Another silence, and then an
+artless young bud ventured the remark that she thought it must have been
+in a buggy, because if it was on horseback he could not have got his arm
+around her. I once thought of sending this anecdote to Mr. Browning, but
+was warned that he was destitute of the sense of humor, especially at his
+own expense, and so desisted.
+
+  "Ah, that our wives could only see
+    How well the money is invested
+  In these old books, which seem to be
+    By them, alas! so much detested."
+
+But the wives are not always unwise in their opposition to their husband's
+book-buying. There is nothing more pitiful than to see the widow of a poor
+clergyman or lawyer trying to sell his library, and to witness her
+disappointment at the shrinkage of value which she had been taught and
+accustomed to regard as so great. A woman who has a true and wise
+sympathy with her husband's book-buying is an adored object. I recollect
+one such, who at her own suggestion gave up the largest and best room in
+her house to her husband's books, and received her callers and guests in a
+smaller one--she also received her husband's blessing.
+
+
+
+
+VIII.
+
+THE ILLUSTRATOR.
+
+
+The popular notion of the Illustrator, as the term is used by the
+Book-Worm, is that he buys many valuable books containing pictures and
+spoils them by tearing the pictures out, and from them constructs another
+valuable book with pictures. We smile to read this in the newspapers. If
+it were strictly true it would be a very reprehensible practice. But
+generally the books compelled to surrender their prints to the Illustrator
+are good for nothing else. To lament over them is as foolish as to grieve
+over the grape-skins out of which has been pressed the luscious
+Johannisburger, or to mourn over the unsightly holes which the
+porcelain-potter has made in the clay-bank. Even among Book-Worms the
+Illustrator, or the "Grangerite," as the term of reproach is, has come in
+for many hard knocks in recent years. John Hill Burton set the tune by his
+merry satire in "The Book-Hunter," in which he portrays the Grangerite
+illustrating the pious Watts' stanzas, beginning, "How doth the little
+busy bee." In his first edition Mr. Burton mentioned among "great writers
+on bees," whose portrait would be desirable, Aristarchus, meaning probably
+Aristomachus. This mistake is not corrected in the last edition, but the
+name is omitted altogether.
+
+Mr. Beverly Chew "drops into poetry" on the subject, and thus
+apostrophises the Grangerite:
+
+      "Ah, ruthless wight,
+  Think of the books you've turned to waste,
+      With patient skill."
+
+Mr. Henri Pere Du Bois thus describes the ordinary result: "Of one hundred
+books extended by the insertion of prints which were not made for them,
+ninety-nine are ruined; the hundredth book is no longer a book; it is a
+museum. An imperfect book, built with the spoils of a thousand books; a
+crazy quilt made of patches out of gowns of queens and scullions." So
+Burton compares the Grangerite to Genghis Kahn. Mr. Lang declares the
+Grangerites are "book ghouls, and brood, like the obscene demons of
+Arabian superstition, over the fragments of the mighty dead." I would like
+to show Mr. Lang how I have treated his "Letters to Dead Authors" and "Old
+Friends" by illustration. He would probably feel, with �sop's lawyer, that
+"circumstances alter cases," although he says "no book deserves the
+honor".
+
+So a reviewer in "The Nation" stigmatises Grangerism as "a vampire art,
+maiming when it does not murder" (I did not know that vampires "maim"
+their victims) "and incapable of rising beyond canibalism" (not that they
+feed on one another, but when critics get excited their metaphors are apt
+to become mixed).
+
+"G. W. S.," of the New York "Tribune," speaks of the achievement of the
+Illustrators as "colossal vulgarities." Mr. Percy Fitzgerald observes:
+"The pitiless Grangerite slaughters a book for a few pictures, just as an
+epicure has had a sheep killed for the sweetbread".
+
+These are very choice hard words. There is much extravagance, but some
+justice in all this criticism. As a question of economics I do not find
+any great difference between a Book-worm who spends thousands of dollars
+in constructing one attractive book from several not attractive, and one
+who spends a thousand dollars in binding a book, or for an example of a
+famous old binder. If there is any difference it is in favor of the
+Grangerite, who improves the volume for the intelligent purposes of the
+reader, as against the other who merely caters to "the lust of the eye".
+
+I am willing to concede that the Grangerite is sometimes guilty of some
+gross offenses against good taste and good sense. The worst of these is
+when he extends the text of the volume itself to a larger page in order to
+embrace large prints. This is grotesque, for it spoils the very book. He
+is also blamable when he squanders valuable prints and time and patience
+on mere book lumber, such as long rows of histories; and when he stuffs
+and crams his book; and when his pictures are not of the era of the
+events or of the time of life of the persons described; and when they are
+too large or too small to be in just proportion to the printed page; and
+when the book is so heavy and cumbersome that no one can handle it with
+comfort or convenience. Above all he is blamable, in my estimation, when
+he entrusts the selection of prints to an agent. Such agency is frequently
+very unsatisfactory, and at all events the Illustrator misses the sport of
+the hunt. Few men would entrust the furnishing or decorating of a house,
+the purchase of a horse, or the selection of a wife to a third person, and
+the delicate matter of choosing prints for a book is essentially one to be
+transacted in person. The danger of any other procedure in the case of a
+wife was illustrated by Cromwell's agency for Henry Eighth in the affair
+of Anne of Cleves, the "Flanders mare."
+
+But when it is properly done, it seems to me that the very best thing the
+Book-Worm ever does is to illustrate his books, because this insures his
+reading them, at least with his fingers. Not always, for a certain
+chronicler of collections of privately illustrated books in this country
+narrates, how "relying upon the index" of a book, which he illustrated, he
+inserted a portrait of Sam Johnson, the famous, whereas "the text called
+for Sam Johnson, an eccentric dramatic writer," etc. His binder, he says,
+laughed at him for being ignorant that there "two Sam Johnsons" (there are
+four in the biographical dictionaries, one of whom was an early president
+of King's College in New York). But if done personally and conscientiously
+it is a means of valuable culture. As one of the oldest survivors of the
+genus Illustrator in this country, I have thus assumed to offer an apology
+and defense for my much berated kind. And now let me make a few
+suggestions as to what seems to me the most suitable mode of the pursuit.
+
+In illustrating there seem to be two methods, which may be described as
+the literal or realistic, and imaginative. The first consists simply in
+the insertion of portraits, views and scenes appropriate to the text. A
+pleasing variety may be imparted to this method by substituting for a mere
+portrait a scene in the life of the celebrity in question. For example,
+if Charles V. and Titian are mentioned together, it would be interesting
+to insert a picture representing the historical incident of the emperor
+picking up and handing the artist a brush which he had dropped--and one
+will have an interesting hunt to find it. But I am more an adherent of the
+romantic school, which finds excellent play in the illustration of poetry.
+For example, in the poem, "Ennui," in "The Croakers," for the line, "The
+fiend, the fiend is on me still," I found, after a search of some years, a
+picture of an imp sitting on the breast of a man in bed with the gout. In
+the same stanza are the lines, "Like a cruel cat, that sucks a child to
+death," and for this I have a print from a children's magazine, of a cat
+squatting on the breast of a child in a cradle. Now I would like "a
+Madagascar bat," which rhymes to "cat" in the poem. "And like a tom-cat
+dies by inches," is illustrated by a picture of a cat caught by the paw in
+a steel trap. "Simon" was "a gentleman of color," the favorite pastry cook
+and caterer of New York half a century ago--before the days of Mr. Ward
+McAllister. "The Croaker" advises him to "buy an eye-glass and become a
+dandy and a gentleman." This is illustrated by a rare and fine print of a
+colored gentleman, dressed in breeches, silk stockings, and ruffled shirt,
+scanning an overdressed lady of African descent through an eye-glass. "The
+ups and downs of politics" is illustrated by a Cruikshank print, the upper
+part of which shows a party making an ascension in a balloon and the lower
+part a party making a descent in a diving-bell, and entitled "the ups and
+downs of life." To illustrate the phrase, "seeing the elephant," take the
+print of Pyrrhus trying to frighten his captive, Fabricus, by suddenly
+drawing the curtains of his tent and showing him an elephant with his
+trunk raised in a baggage-smashing attitude. For "The Croakers" there are
+apt illustrations also of the following queer subjects: Korah, Dathan and
+Abiram; Miss Atropos, shut up your Scissors; Albany's two Steeples high in
+Air, Reading Cobbett's Register, Bony in His Prison Isle, Giant Wife,
+Beauty and The Beast, Fly Market, Tammany Hall, The Dove from Noah's Ark,
+Rome Saved by Geese, C�sar Offered a Crown, C�sar Crossing the Rubicon,
+Dick Ricker's Bust, Sancho in His Island Reigning, The Wisest of Wild
+Fowl, Reynold' Beer House, A Mummy, A Chimney Sweep, The Arab's Wind,
+Pygmalion, Danae, Highland Chieftain with His Tail On, Nightmare, Shaking
+Quakers, Polony's Crazy Daughter, Bubble-Blowing, First Pair of Breeches,
+Banquo's Ghost, Press Gang, Fair Lady With the Bandaged Eye, A Warrior
+Leaning on His Sword, A Warrior's Tomb, A Duel, and A Street Flirtation.
+
+As the charm of illustrating consists in the hunt for the prints, so the
+latter method is the more engrossing because the game is the more
+difficult to run down. Portraits, views and scenes are plenty, but to find
+them properly adaptable is frequently difficult. Some things which one
+would suppose readily procurable are really hard to find. For example, it
+was a weary chase to get a treadmill, and so of a drum-major, although the
+latter is now not uncommon: and although I know it exists, I have not
+attained unto a bastinado. Sirens and mermaids are rather retiring, and
+when Vedder depicted the Sea-Serpent he conferred a boon on Illustrators.
+"God's Scales," in which the mendicant weighs down the rich man, is a
+rarity. Milton leaving his card on Galileo in prison is among my wants,
+although I have seen it.
+
+As to scarce portraits, let me sing a song of
+
+  THE SHY PORTRAITS.
+
+  Oh, why do you elude me so--
+    Ye portraits that so long I've sought?
+  That somewhere ye exist, I know--
+    Indifferent, good, and good for naught.
+
+  Lucrezia, of the poisoned cup,
+    Why do you shrink away by stealth?
+  To view your "mug" with you I'd sup,
+    And even dare to drink your health.
+
+  Oh! why so coy, Godiva fair?
+    You're covered by your shining tresses,
+  And I would promise not to stare
+    At sheerest of go-diving dresses.
+
+  Come out, old Bluebeard; don't be shy!
+    You're not so bad as Froude's great hero;
+  Xantippe, fear no law gone by
+    When scolds were ducked in ponds at zero.
+
+  Not mealy-mouthed was Mrs. Behn,
+    And prudish was satiric Jane,
+  But equally they both shun men,
+    As if they bore the mark of Cain.
+
+  George Barrington, you may return
+    To country which you "left for good;"
+  Psalmanazar, I would not spurn
+    Your language when 'twas understood.
+
+  Jean Grolier, you left many books--
+    They come so dear I must ignore 'em--
+  But there's no evidence of your looks
+    For us surviving "amicorum."
+
+  This country's overrun by grangers--
+    I'm ignorant of their christian names
+  But my afflicted eyes are strangers
+    To one I want whom men call James.
+
+  There's Heber, man of many books--
+    You're far more modest than the Bishop;
+  I'm curious to learn your looks,
+    And care for nothing shown at his shop.
+
+  And oh! that wondrous, pattern child!
+    His truthfulness, no one can match it;
+  Dear little George! I'm almost wild
+    To find a wood-cut of his hatchet.
+
+  Show forth your face, Anonymous,
+    Whose name is in the books I con
+  Most frequently; so famous thus,
+    Will you not come to me anon?
+
+By way of jest I have inserted an anonymous portrait opposite an anonymous
+poem, and was once gravely asked by an absent-minded friend if it really
+was the portrait of the author. One however will probably look in vain for
+portraits of "Quatorze" and "Quinze," for which a print seller of New York
+once had an inquiry, and I have been told of a collector who returned
+Arlington because of the cut on his nose, and Ogle because of his damaged
+eye. But there is more sport in hunting for a dodo than a rabbit.
+
+It is also a pleasant thing to lay a picture occasionally in a book
+without setting out to illustrate it regularly, so that it may break upon
+one as a surprise when he takes up the book years afterward. It is a
+grateful surprise to find in Ruskin's "Modern Painters" a casual print
+from Roger's "Italy," and in Hamerton's books some sporadic etchings by
+Rembrandt or Hayden. It is like discovering an unexpected "quarter" in the
+pocket of an old waistcoat. For example, in "With Thackeray in America,"
+Mr. Eyre Crowe tells how the second number of the first edition of "The
+Newcomes" came to the author when he was in Paris, and how he found fault
+with Doyle's illustration of the games of the Charterhouse boys. He says:
+"The peccant accessory which roused the wrath of the writer was the group
+of two boys playing at marbles on the left of the spectator. 'Why,' said
+the irate author, 'they would as soon thought of cutting off their heads
+as play marbles at the Charterhouse!' This woodcut was, I noticed,
+suppressed altogether in subsequent editions." Now in my copy--not being
+the possessor of the first edition--I have made a reference to Mr. Crowe's
+passage, and supplied the suppressed cut from an early American copy which
+cost me twenty-five cents. How many of the first edition men know of the
+interesting fact narrated by Mr. Crowe? The Illustrator ought always at
+least to insert the portrait of the author whenever it has been omitted by
+the publisher.
+
+Second: What to illustrate. The Illustrator should not be an imitator or
+follower, but should strive after an unhackneyed subject. A man is not apt
+to marry the woman who flings herself at his head; he loves the
+excitement of courting; and so there is not much amusement in utilizing
+common pictures, but the charm consists in hunting for scarce ones. It is
+very natural to tread in others' tracks, and easy, because the market
+affords plenty of material for the common subjects. Shakespeare and Walton
+and Boswell's Johnson, and a few other things of that sort, have been done
+to death, and there is fairer scope in something else. Biographies of
+Painters, Elia's Essays, Sir Thomas Browne's "Religio Medici" and "Urn
+Burial," "Childe Harold," Horace, Virgil, the Life of Bayard, or of
+Vittoria Colonna, or Philip Sidney, and Sappho are charming subjects, and
+not too common. A ponderous or voluminous work lends itself less
+conveniently to the purpose than a small book in one or two volumes. Great
+quartos and folios are mere mausoleums or repositories for expensive
+prints, too huge to handle, and too extensive for any one ever to look
+through, and therefore they afford little pleasure to the owners or their
+guests. An illustrated Shakespeare in thirty volumes is theoretically a
+very grand object, but I should never have the heart to open it, and as
+for histories, I should as soon think of illustrating a dictionary. Walton
+is a lovely subject, but I would adopt a small copy and keep it within two
+or three volumes. After all there is nothing so charming as a single
+little illustrated volume, like "Ballads of Books," compiled by Brander
+Matthews; Andrew Lang's "Letters to Dead Authors," or "Old Friends,"
+Friswell's "Varia," the "Book of Death," "Melodies and Madrigals," "The
+Book of Rubies," Winter's "Shakespeare's England."
+
+A gentleman who published, a good many years ago, a monograph of privately
+illustrated books in this country, spoke of the work that I had done in
+this field, and criticised me for my "apparent want of method,"
+"eccentricity," "madness," "vagaries," "omnivorousness," and "lack of
+speciality or system," and finally, although he blamed me for having
+illustrated pretty much everything, he also blamed me for not having
+illustrated any "biographical works." This criticism seems not only
+inconsistent, but without basis, for one man may not dictate to another
+what he shall prefer to illustrate for his own amusement, any more than
+what sort of a house or pictures he shall buy or what complexion or
+stature his wife shall have. The author also did me the honor to spell my
+name wrong, and did the famous Greek amatory poet the honor of mentioning
+among my illustrated work, "Odes to Anacreon." Would that I could find
+that book!
+
+I offer these suggestions with diffidence, and with no intention to impose
+my taste upon others.
+
+If the Illustrator can get or make something absolutely unique he is a
+fortunate man. For example, I know one, stigmatized as eccentric, who has
+illustrated a printed catalogue of his own library with portraits of the
+authors, copies of prints in the books, and duplicates of engraved
+title-pages; also one who has illustrated a collection in print or in
+manuscript of his own poems; also one who has illustrated a Life of
+Hercules, written by himself, printed by one of his own family, and
+adorned with prints from antique gems and other subjects; and even a
+lawyer who has illustrated a law book written by himself, in which he has
+found place for prints so diverse and apparently out of keeping as Jonah
+and the whale, John Brown, a man pacing the floor in a nightgown with a
+crying baby, a "darkey" shot in a melon-patch, an elephant on the rampage,
+Cupid, Hudibras writing a letter, Joanna Southcote, Launce and his dog, a
+dog catching a boy going over a wall, Dr. Watts, Robinson Crusoe, Barnum
+in the form of a hum-bug, Jacob Hall the rope dancer, Lord Mayor's
+procession, Raphael discoursing to Adam, gathering sea-weed, Artemus Ward,
+a whale ashore, a barber-shop, Gilpin's ride, King Lear, St. Lawrence on
+his gridiron, Charles Lamb, Terpsichore, and a child tumbling into a well.
+The owner of such a book may be sure that it is unique, as the man was
+certain his coat of arms was genuine, because he made it himself.
+
+Third: the Illustrator should not be in a hurry.
+
+There are three singular things about the hunt for pictures. One is, the
+moment you have your book bound, no matter how many years you may have
+waited, some rare picture you wanted is sure to turn up. Hence the
+reluctance of the Illustrator to commit himself to binding, a reluctance
+only paralleled by that of the lover to marry the woman he had courted for
+ten years, because then he would have no place to spend his evenings. (I
+have had books "in hand" for twenty years).
+
+Another is, when you have found your rare picture you are pretty certain
+to find one or two duplicates. Prints, like accidents or crimes, seem to
+come in cycles and schools. I have known a man to search in vain in thirty
+print-shops in London, and coming home find what he wanted in a New York
+print-shop, and two copies at that. The third is, that you are continually
+coming very near the object without quite attaining it. Thus one may get
+Lady Godiva alone, and the effigy of Peeping Tom on the corner of an old
+house at Coventry, but to procure the whole scene is, so far as I know,
+out of the question. It would seem that Mr. Anthony Comstock has put his
+ban on it. So one will find it difficult to get "God's scales," in which
+wealth and poverty are weighed against each other, but I have had other
+scales thrust at me, such as those in which the emblems of love are
+weighed against those of religion, and a king against a beggar, but even
+the latter is not the precise thing, for in these days there are poor
+kings and rich beggars.
+
+One opinion in which all illustrators agree seems sound, and that is, that
+photographs are not to be tolerated. Photography is the most
+misrepresentative of arts. But an exception may be indulged in the case
+of those few celebrities who are too modest to allow themselves to be
+engraved, and of whom photography furnishes the only portraiture. A
+photographic copy of a rare portrait in oil is also admissible. Some also
+exclude wood-cuts. I am not such a purist as that. They are frequently the
+only means of illustrating a subject, and small and fine wood-cuts form
+charming head and tail pieces and marginal adornments. One who eschews
+wood-cuts must forego such interesting little subjects as Washington and
+his little hatchet, God's scales, the skeleton in the closet, and many of
+those which I have particularized. I flatter myself that I have made the
+margins of a good many books very interesting by means of small wood-cuts,
+of which our modern magazines provide an abundant and exquisite supply.
+These furnish a copious source of specific illustration.
+
+With their zeal illustrators are sometimes apt to be anachronistic. Every
+book ought to be illustrated in the spirit and costume of its time. The
+book should not be stuffed too full of prints; let a better proportion be
+preserved between the text and the illustrations than Falstaff observed
+between his bread and his sack. The prints should not be so numerous as to
+cause the text to be forgotten, as in the case of a tedious sermon.
+
+Probably nearly every collector expects that his treasures will be
+dispersed at his death, if not sooner. But it is a serious question to the
+illustrator, what will become of these precious objects upon which he has
+spent so much time, thought and labor, and for which he has expended so
+much money. He never cares and rarely knows, and if he knows he never
+tells, how much they have cost, but he may always be certain that they
+will never fetch their cost. Let us not indulge in any false dreams on
+this subject. The time may have been when prints were cheap and when the
+illustrator may have been able to make himself whole or even reap a
+profit, but that day I believe has gone by. One can hardly expect that
+his family will care for these things; the son generally thinks the
+Book-Worm a bore, and the wife of one's bosom and the daughter of one's
+heart usually affect more interest than they feel, and if they kept such
+objects would do so from a sense of duty alone, as the ancient Romans
+preserved the cinerary urns of their ancestors. For myself, I have often
+imagined my grandson listlessly turning over one of my favorite
+illustrated volumes, and saying, "What a funny old duffer grandad must
+have been!" Such a book-club, as the "Grolier," of New York, is a
+fortunate avenue of escape from these evils. There one might deposit at
+least some of his peculiar treasures, certain that they would receive good
+care, be regarded with permanent interest, and keep alive his memory.
+
+To augment his books by inserting prints is ordinarily just the one thing
+which the Book-Worm can do to render them in a deeper sense his own, and
+to gain for himself a peculiar proprietorship in them. Generally he cannot
+himself bind them, but by this means he may render himself a coadjutor of
+the author, and place himself on equal terms with the printer and the
+binder.
+
+After he has illustrated a favorite book once, it is an enjoyable
+occupation for the Book-Worm to do it over again, in a different spirit
+and with different pictures. "Second thoughts are best," it has been said,
+and I have more than once improved my subject by a second treatment.
+
+There is another form of illustration, of which I have not spoken, and
+that is the insertion of clippings from magazines and newspapers in the
+fly leaves. Sometimes these are of intense interest. My own Dickens,
+Thackeray and Hawthorne, in particular have their porticoes and posterms
+plentifully supplied with material of this sort. The latest contribution
+of this kind is to "Martin Chuzzlewit," and consists in the information
+that a western American "land-shark" has recently swindled people by
+selling them swamp-lots, attractively depicted on a map and named Eden.
+In my Pepys I have laid Mr. Lang's recent letter to the diarist. So on a
+fly leaf of Hawthorne's Life it is pleasing to see a cut of his little red
+house at Lenox, now destroyed by fire.
+
+
+
+
+IX.
+
+BOOK-PLATES.
+
+
+A rather modern form of book-spoliation has arisen in the collection of
+book-plates. These are literally derived "ex libris," and the business
+cannot be indulged, as a general thing, without in some sense despoiling
+books. It cannot be denied that it is a fascinating pursuit. So
+undoubtedly is the taking of watches or rings or other "articles of
+bigotry or virtue," on the highway. But somehow there is something so
+essentially personal in a book-plate, that it is hard to understand why
+other persons than the owners should become possessed by a passion for it.
+Many years ago when Burton, the great comedian, was in his prime, he used
+to act in a farce called "Toodles"--at all events, that was his name in
+the play--and he was afflicted with a wife who had a mania for attending
+auctions and buying all kinds of things, useful or useless, provided that
+they only seemed cheap. One day she came home with a door-plate,
+inscribed, "Thompson"--"Thompson with a p," as Toodles wrathfully
+described it; and this was more than Toodles could stand. He could not see
+what possible use there could ever be in that door-plate for the Toodles
+family. In those same days, there used to be displayed on the door of a
+modest house, on the east side of Broadway, in the city of New York,
+somewhere about Eighth Street, a silver door-plate inscribed, "Mr. Astor."
+This appertained to the original John Jacob. In those days I frequently
+remarked it, and thought what a prize it would be to Mrs. Toodles or some
+collector of door-plates. Now I can understand why one might acquire a
+taste for collecting book-plates of distinguished men or famous
+book-collectors, just as one collects autographs; but why collect hundreds
+and thousands of book-plates of undistinguished and even unknown persons,
+frequently consisting of nothing more than family coats-of-arms, or mere
+family names? I must confess that I share to a certain extent in Mr.
+Lang's antipathy to this species of collecting, and am disposed to call
+down on these collectors Shakespeare's curse on him who should move his
+bones. But I cannot go with Mr. Lang when he calls these well-meaning and
+by no means mischevious persons some hard names.
+
+In some localities it is quite the vogue to take off the coffin-plate from
+the coffin--all the other silver "trimmings," too, for that matter--and
+preserve it, and even have it framed and hung up in the home of the late
+lamented. There may be a sense of proprietorship in the mourners, who have
+bought and paid for it, and see no good reason for burying it, that will
+justify this practice. At all events it is a family matter. The coffin
+plate reminds the desolate survivors of the person designated, who is
+shelved forever in the dust. But what would be said of the sense or sanity
+of one who should go about collecting and framing coffin-plates,
+cataloguing them, and even exchanging them?
+
+Book-worms penetrate to different distances in books. Some go no further
+than the title page; others dig into the preface or bore into the table of
+contents; a few begin excavations at the close, to see "how it comes out."
+But that Worm is most easily satisfied who never goes beyond the inside of
+the front cover, and passes his time in prying off the book-plates.
+
+I think I have heard of persons who collect colophons. These go to work in
+the reverse direction, and are even more reprehensible than the
+accumulators of book-plates, because they inevitably ruin the book.
+
+A book-plate is appropriate, sometimes ornamental, even beautiful, in its
+intended place in the proprietor's book. Out of that, with rare
+exceptions, it strikes one like the coffin-plate, framed and hanging on
+the wall. It gives additional value and attractiveness to a book which
+one buys, but it ought to remain there.
+
+If one purchases books once owned by A, B and C--undistinguished persons,
+or even distinguished--containing their autographs, he does not cut them
+out to form a collection of autographs. If the name is not celebrated,
+the autograph has no interest or value; if famous, it has still greater
+interest and value by remaining in the book. So it seems to me it should
+be in respect to book-plates. Let Mr. Astor's door-plate stay on his
+front door, and let the energetic Mrs. Toodles content herself in buying
+something less invididual and more adaptable.
+
+A book-plate really is of no value except to the owner, as the man says of
+papers which he has lost. It cannot be utilized to mark the possessions of
+another. In this respect it is of inferior value to the door-plate, for
+possibly another Mr. Astor might arise, to whom the orignal door-plate
+might be sold. A Boston newspaper tells of a peddler of door-plates who
+contracted to sell a Salem widow a door-plate; and when she gave him her
+name to be engraved on it, gave only her surname, objecting to any first
+name or initials, observing: "I might get married again, and if my
+initials or first name were on the plate, it would be of no use. If they
+are left off, the plate could be used by my son."
+
+Thus much about collecting book-plates. One word may be tolerated about
+the character of one's own book-plate. To my taste, mere coats-of-arms
+with mottoes are not the best form. They simply denote ownership. They
+might well answer some further purpose, as for example to typify the
+peculiar tastes of the proprietor in respect to his books. A portrait of
+the owner is not objectionable, indeed is quite welcome in connection with
+some device or motto pertaining to books and not to mere family descent.
+But why, although a collector may have a favorite author, like Hawthorne
+or Thackeray, for example, should he insert his portrait in his
+book-plate, as is often done? Mr. Howells would writhe in his grave if he
+knew that somebody had stuck Thackeray's portrait or Scott's in "Silas
+Lapham," and those Calvinists who think that the "Scarlet Letter" is
+wicked, would pronounce damnation on the man who should put the gentle
+Hawthorne's portrait in a religious book. To be sure, one might have a
+variety of book-plates, with portraits appropriate to different kinds of
+books--Napoleon's for military, Calvin for religious, Walton's for angling
+and a composite portrait of Howells-James for fiction of the photographic
+school; but this would involve expense and destroy the intrinsic unity
+desirable in the book-plate. So let the portrait, if any, be either that
+of the proprietor or a conventional image. If I were to relax and allow a
+single exception it would be in favor of dear Charles Lamb's portrait in
+"Fraser's," representing him as reading a book by candle light. (For the
+moment this idea pleases me so much that I feel half inclined to eat all
+my foregoing words on this point, and adopt it for myself. At any rate, I
+hereby preempt the privilege.)
+
+I have referred to Mr. Lang's antipathy to book-plate collectors, and
+while, as I have observed, he goes to extravagant lengths in condemning
+their pursuit, still it may be of interest to my readers to know just
+what he says about them, and so I reproduce below a ballad on the subject,
+with (the material for) which he kindly supplied me when I solicited his
+mild expression of opinion on the subject:
+
+  THE SNATCHERS.
+
+  The Romans snatched the Sabine wives;
+    The crime had some extenuation,
+  For they were leading lonely lives
+    And driven to reckless desperation.
+
+  Lord Elgin stripped the Grecian frieze
+    Of all its marbles celebrated,
+  So our art-students now with ease
+    Consult the figures overrated.
+
+  Napoleon stole the southern pictures
+    And hung them up to grace the Louvre;
+  And though he could not make them fixtures,
+    They answered as an art-improver.
+
+  Bold men ransack an Egyptian tomb,
+    And with the mummies there make free;
+  Such intermeddling with Time's womb
+    May aid in archeology.
+
+  So Cruncher dug up graves in haste,
+    To sell the corpses to the doctors;
+  This trade was not against his taste,
+    Though Misses "flopped," and vowed it shocked hers.
+
+  The modern snatcher sponges leaves
+    And boards of books to crib their labels;
+  Most petty, trivial of thieves,
+    Surpassing all we read in fables.
+
+  He pastes them in a big, blank book
+    To show them to some rival fool,
+  And I pronounce him, when I look,
+    An almost idiotic ghoul.
+
+
+
+
+X.
+
+THE BOOK-AUCTIONEER.
+
+
+There is one figure that stands in a very unpleasant relation to books.
+
+If anybody has any curiosity to know what I consider the most undesirable
+occupation of mankind, I will answer candidly--that of an auctioneer of
+private libraries. It does not seem to have fallen into disrepute like
+that of the headsman or hangman, and perhaps it is as unpleasantly
+essential as that of the undertaker. But it generally thrives on the
+unhappiness of those who are compelled to part with their books, on the
+rivalries of the rich, and the strifes of the trade. It was urged
+against Mr. Cleveland, on his first canvass for the Presidency, that when
+he was sheriff he had hanged a murderer. For my own part, I admired him
+for performing that solemn office himself rather than hiring an underling
+to do it. But if he had been a book-auctioneer, I might have been
+prejudiced against him.
+
+Not so ignoble and inhuman perhaps as that of the slave-seller, still the
+business must breed a sort of callousness which is abhorrent to the genial
+Book-Worm. How I hate the glib rattle of his tongue, the mouldiness of his
+jests and the transparency of his puffery! I should think he would hate
+himself. It must be worse than acting Hamlet or Humpty Dumpty a hundred
+consecutive nights. Dante had no punishment for the Book-Worm in hell,
+if I remember right, but if he deserved any pitiless reprobation, it would
+be found in compelling him to cry off books to all eternity. Grant that
+the auctioneer is a person of sensibility and acquainted with good books,
+then his calling must give him many a pang as he observes the ignorance
+and carelessness of his audience. It is better and more fitting that he
+should know little of his wares. He ought to be well paid for his work,
+and he is--no man gets so much for mere talk except the lawyer, and
+perhaps not even he. I do not so much complain of his favoritism. When
+there is something especially desirable going, I frequently fail to catch
+his eye, and my rival gets the prize. But in this he is no worse than
+the Speaker. On the other hand he sometimes loads me up with a thing that
+I do not want, and in possession of which I would be unwilling to be found
+dead, pretending that I winked at him--a species of imposition which it is
+impolitic to resent for fear of being entirely ignored. These
+discretionary favors are regarded as a practical joke and must not be
+declined. But what I do complain of is his commercial stolidity,
+surpassing that of Charles Surface when he sold the portraits of his
+ancestors. The "bete noir" of the book trade is
+
+  THE STOLID AUCTIONEER.
+
+    Let not a sad ghost
+    From the scribbling host
+  Revisit this workaday sphere;
+    He'll find in the sequel
+    All talents are equal
+  When they come to the auctioneer.
+
+    Not a whit cares he
+    What the book may be,
+  Whether missal with glorious show,
+    A folio Shakespeare,
+    Or an Elzevir,
+  Or a Tupper, or E. P. Roe.
+
+    Without any qualms
+    He knocks down the Psalms,
+  Or the chaste Imitatio,
+    And takes the same pains
+    To enhance his gains
+  With a ribald Boccaccio.
+
+    He rattles them off,
+    Not stopping to cough,
+  He shows no distinction of person;
+    One minute's enough
+    For similar stuff
+  Like Shelley and Ossian Macpherson.
+
+    A Paradise Lost
+    Is had for less cost
+  Than a bulky "fifteener" in Greek,
+    And Addison's prose
+    Quite frequently goes
+  For a tenth of a worthless "unique."
+
+    This formula stale
+    Of his will avail
+  For an epitaph meet for his rank,
+    When dropping his gavel
+    He falls in the gravel,
+  "Do I hear nothing more?--gone--to--?
+
+I speak feelingly, but I think it is pardonable. I once went through an
+auction sale of my own books, and while I lost money on volumes on which I
+had bestowed much thought, labor and expense, I made a profit on Gibbon's
+"Decline and Fall" in tree-calf. I do not complain of the loss; what I was
+mortified by was the profit. But the auctioneer was not at all abashed; in
+fact he seemed rather pleased, and apparently regarded it as a feather in
+his cap. I have always suspected that the shameless purchaser was Silas
+Wegg.
+
+
+
+
+XI.
+
+THE BOOKSELLER.
+
+
+Considering his importance in modern civilization, it is singular that so
+little has been recorded of the Bookseller in literature. Shakespeare has
+a great deal to say of books of various kinds, but not a word, I believe,
+of the Bookseller. It is true that Ursa Major gave a mitigated growl of
+applause to the booksellers, if I recollect my Boswell right, and he
+condescended to write a life of Cave, but bookseller in his view meant
+publisher. It is true that Charles Knight wrote a book entitled "Shadows
+of the Old Booksellers," but here too the characters were mainly
+publishers, and his account of them is indeed shadowy. The chief thing
+that I recall about any of the booksellers thus celebrated is that Tom
+Davies had "a pretty wife," which is probably the reason why Doctor
+Johnson thought Tom would better have stuck to the stage. So far as I
+know, the most vivid pen-pictures of booksellers are those depicting the
+humble members of the craft, the curb-stone venders. They are much more
+picturesque than their more affluent brethren who are used to the luxury
+of a roof.
+
+
+    Rummaging over the contents of an old stall, at a half book, half old
+    iron shop in Ninety-four alley, leading from Wardour street to Soho,
+    yesterday, I lit upon a ragged duodecimo, which has been the strange
+    delight of my infancy; the price demanded was sixpence, which the
+    owner (a little squab duodecimo of a character himself) enforced with
+    the assurance that his own mother should not have it for a farthing
+    less. On my demurring to this extraordinary assertion, the dirty
+    little vender reinforced his assertion with a sort of oath, which
+    seemed more than the occasion demanded. "And now," said he, "I have
+    put my soul to it." Pressed by so solemn an asseveration, I could no
+    longer resist a demand which seemed to set me, however unworthy, upon
+    a level with his nearest relations; and depositing a tester, I bore
+    away the battered prize in triumph.
+
+    --Essays of Elia.
+
+
+Monsieur Uzanne, who has treated of the elegancies of the Fan, the Muff,
+and the Umbrella, has more recently given the world a quite unique series
+of studies among the bookstalls and the quays of Paris--"The Book Hunter
+in Paris"--and this too one finds more entertaining than any account of
+Quaritch's or Putnam's shop would be.
+
+I must bear witness to the honesty and liberality of booksellers. When one
+considers the hundreds of catalogues from which he has ordered books at a
+venture, even from across the ocean, and how seldom he has been misled or
+disappointed in the result, one cannot subscribe to a belief in the dogma
+of total depravity. I remember some of my booksellers with positive
+affection. They were such self-denying men to consent to part with their
+treasures at any price. And as a rule they are far more careless than
+ordinary merchants about getting or securing their pay. To be sure it is
+rather ignoble for the painter of a picture, or the chiseller of a statue,
+or the vender of a fine book, to affect the acuteness of tradesmen in the
+matter of compensation. The excellent bookseller takes it for granted, if
+he stoops to think about it, that if a man orders a Caxton or a Grolier he
+will pay for it, at his convenience. It was this unthinking liberality
+which led a New York bookseller to give credit to a distinguished
+person--afterwards a candidate for the Presidency--to a considerable
+amount, and to let the account stand until it was outlawed, and his
+sensibilities were greviously shocked, when being compelled to sue for his
+due, his debtor pleaded the statute of limitations! His faith was not
+restored even when the acute buyer left a great sum of money by his will
+to found a public library, and the legacy failed through informality.
+
+I have only one complaint to make against booksellers. They should teach
+their clerks to recognize The Book-Worm at a glance. It is very
+annoying, when I go browsing around a book-shop, to have an attendant come
+up and ask me, who have bought books for thirty years, if he can "show me
+anything"--just as if I wanted to see anything in particular--or if
+"anybody is waiting on me"--when all I desire is to be let alone. Some
+booksellers, I am convinced, have this art of recognition, for they let me
+alone, and I make it a rule always to buy something of them, but never
+when their employees are so annoyingly attentive. I do not object to being
+watched; it is only the implication that I need any assistance that
+offends me. It is easy to recognize the Book-Worm at a glance by the care
+with which he handles the rare books and the indifference with which he
+passes the standard authors in holiday bindings.
+
+Once I had a bookseller who had a talent for drawing, which he used to
+exercise occasionally on the exterior of an express package of books. One
+of these wrappings I have preserved, exhibiting a pen-and-ink drawing of a
+war-ship firing a big gun at a few small birds. Perhaps this was
+satirically intended to denote the pains and time he had expended on so
+small a sale. But I will now immortalize him.
+
+The most striking picture of a bookseller that I recall in all literature
+is one drawn by M. Uzanne, in the charming book mentioned above, which I
+will endeavor to transmute and transmit under the title of
+
+  THE PROPHETIC BOOK.
+
+  "La Croix," said the Emperor, "cease to beguile;
+    These bookstalls must go from my bridges and quays;
+  No longer shall tradesmen my city defile
+    With mouldering hideous scarecrows like these."
+
+  While walking that night with the bibliophile,
+    On the Quai Malaquais by the Rue de Saints Peres,
+  The Emperor saw, with satirical smile,
+    Enkindling his stove, in the chill evening air,
+
+  With leaves which he tore from a tome by his side,
+    A bookseller ancient, with tremulous hands;
+  And laying aside his imperial pride,
+    "What book are you burning?" the Emperor demands.
+
+  For answer Pere Foy handed over the book,
+    And there as the headlines saluted his glance,
+  Napoleon read, with a stupefied look,
+    "Account of the Conquests and Victories of France."
+
+  The dreamer imperial swallowed his ire;
+    Pere Foy still remained at his musty old stand,
+  Till France was environed by sword and by fire,
+    And Germans like locusts devoured the land.
+
+Doubtless the occupation of bookseller is generally regarded as a very
+pleasant as well as a refined one. But there is another side, in the
+estimation of a true Book-Worm, and it is not agreeable to him to
+contemplate the life of
+
+  THE BOOK-SELLER.
+
+  He stands surrounded by rare tomes
+  Which find with him their transient homes,
+    He knows their fragrant covers;
+  He keeps them but a week or two,
+  Surrenders then their charming view
+    To bibliomaniac lovers.
+
+  An enviable man, you say,
+  To own such wares if but a day,
+    And handle, see and smell;
+  But all the time his spirit shrinks,
+  As wandering through his shop he thinks
+    He only keeps to sell.
+
+  The man who buys from him retains
+  His purchase long as life remains,
+    And then he doesn't mind
+  If his unbookish eager heirs,
+  Administering his affairs,
+    Shall throw them to the wind.
+
+  Or if in life he sells, in sooth,
+  'Tis parting with a single tooth,
+    A momentary pain;
+  Booksellers, like Sir Walter's Jew,
+  Must this keen suffering renew,
+    Again and yet again.
+
+  And so we need not envy him
+  Who sells us books, for stark and grim
+    Remains this torture deep.
+  This Universalistic hell--
+  Throughout this life he's bound to sell;
+    He has, but cannot keep.
+
+
+
+
+XII.
+
+THE PUBLIC LIBRARIAN.
+
+
+There is one species of the Book-Worm which is more pitiable than the
+Bookseller, and that is the Public Librarian, especially of a circulating
+library. He is condemned to live among great collections of books and
+exhibit them to the curious public, and to be debarred from any
+proprietorship in them, even temporary. But the greater part this does not
+grieve a true Book-Worm, for he would scorn ownership of a vast majority
+of the books which he shows, but on the comparatively rare occasions when
+he is called on to produce a real book (in the sense of Bibliomania), he
+must be saddened by the reflection that it is not his own, and that the
+inspection of it is demanded of him as a matter of right. I have often
+observed the ill concealed reluctance with which the librarian complies
+with such a request; how he looks at the demandant with a degree of
+surprise, and then produces the key of the repository where the treasure
+is kept under guard, and heaving a sigh delivers the volume with a
+grudging hand. It was this characteristic which led me in my youth, before
+I had been inducted into the delights of Bibliomania and had learned to
+appreciate the feelings of a librarian, to define him as one who
+conceives it to be his duty to prevent the public from seeing the books. I
+owe a good old librarian an apology for having said this of him, and
+hereby offer my excuses to one whose honorable name is recorded in the
+Book of Life. Much is to be forgiven to the man who loves books, and yet
+is doomed to deal out books that perish in the using, which no human being
+would ever read a second time nor "be found dead with." These are the true
+tests of a good book, especially the last. Shelley died with a little
+�schylus on his person, which the cruel waves spared, and when Tennyson
+fell asleep it was with a Shakespeare, open at "Cymbeline." One may be
+excused for reading a good deal that he never would re-read, but not for
+owning it, nor for owning a good deal which he would feel ashamed to have
+for his last earthly companion. But now for my tribute to
+
+  THE PUBLIC LIBRARIAN.
+
+  His books extend on every side,
+  And up and down the vistas wide
+      His eye can take them in;
+  He does not love these books at all,
+  Their usefulness in big and small
+      He counts as but a sin.
+
+  And all day long he stands to serve
+  The public with an aching nerve;
+      He views them with disdain--
+  The student with his huge round glasses,
+  The maiden fresh from high school classes,
+      With apathetic brain;
+
+  The sentimental woman lorn,
+  The farmer recent from his corn,
+      The boy who thirsts for fun,
+  The graybeard with a patent-right,
+  The pedagogue of school at night,
+      The fiction-gulping one.
+
+  They ask for histories, reports,
+  Accounts of turf and prize-ring sports,
+      The census of the nation;
+  Philosophy and science too,
+  The fresh romances not a few,
+      Also "Degeneration."
+
+  "They call these books!" he said, and throws
+  Them down in careless heaps and rows
+      Before the ticket-holder;
+  He'd like to cast them at his head,
+  He wishes they might strike him dead,
+      And with the reader moulder.
+
+  But now as for the shrine of saint
+  He seeks a spot whence sweet and faint
+      A leathery smell exudes,
+  And there behind the gilded wires
+  For some loved rarity inquires
+      Which common gaze eludes.
+
+  He wishes Omar would return
+  That vulgar mob of books to burn,
+      While he, like Virgil's hero,
+  Would shoulder off this precious case
+  To some secluded private place
+      With temperature at zero.
+
+  And there in that Seraglio
+  Of books not kept for public show,
+      He'd feast his glowing eyes,
+  Forgetting that these beauties rare,
+  Morocco-clad and passing fair,
+      Are but the Sultan's prize.
+
+  But then a tantalizing sense
+  Invades expectancy intense,
+      And with extorted moan,
+  "Unhappy man!" he sighs, "condemned
+  To show such treasure and to lend--
+      I keep, but cannot own!"
+
+
+
+
+XIII.
+
+DOES BOOK COLLECTING PAY.
+
+
+We now come to the sordid but serious consideration whether books are a
+"good investment" in the financial sense. The mind of every true
+Book-Worm should revolt from this question, for none except a bookseller
+is pardonable for buying books with the design of selling them.
+Booksellers are a necessary evil, as purveyors for the Book-Worm. I
+regard them as the old woman regarded the thirty-nine articles of faith;
+when inquired of by her bishop what she thought of them, she said, "I
+don't know as I've anything against them." So I don't know that I have
+anything against booksellers, although I must concede that they generally
+have something against me. As no well regulated man ever grudges expense
+on the house that forms his home, or on its adornment, and rarely cares or
+even reflects whether he can get his money back, so it is with the true
+bibliomaniac. He never intends to part with his books any more than with
+his homestead. Then again the use and enjoyment of books ought to count
+for something like interest on the capital invested. Many times, directly
+or indirectly, the use of a library is worth even more than the interest
+on the outlay. It is singular how expenditure in books is regarded as an
+extravagance by the business world. One may spend the price of a fine
+library in fast or showy horses, or in travel, or in gluttony, or in stock
+speculations eventuating on the wrong side of his ledger, and the
+money-grubbing community think none the worse of him. But let him expend
+annually a few thousands in books, and these sons of Mammon pull long
+faces, wag their shallow heads, and sneeringly observe, "screw loose
+somewhere," "never get half what he has paid for them," "too much of a
+Book-Worm to be a sharp business man." A man who boldly bets on stocks in
+Wall Street is a gallant fellow, forsooth, and excites the admiration of
+the business community (especially of those who thrive on his losses) even
+when he "comes out at the little end of the horn." As Ruskin observes, we
+frequently hear of a bibliomaniac, never of a horse-maniac. It is said
+there is a private stable in Syracuse, New York, which has cost several
+hundred thousand dollars. The owner is regarded as perfectly sane and the
+building is viewed with great pride by the public, but if the owner had
+expended as much on a private library his neighbors would have thought him
+a lunatic. If a man in business wants to excite the suspicion of the sleek
+gentlemen who sit around the discount board with him, or yell like
+lunatics at the stock exchange with him, or talk with him about the tariff
+or free silver, or any other subject on which no two men ever agree unless
+it is for their interest, let it leak out that he has put a few thousand
+dollars into a Mazarine Bible, or a Caxton, or a first folio Shakespeare
+or some other rare book. No matter if he can afford it, most of his
+associates regard him as they do a Bedlamite who goes about collecting
+straws. Fortunate is he if his wife does not privately call on the family
+attorney and advise with him about putting a committee over the poor man.
+
+But if we must regard book-buying in a money sense, and were to admit that
+books never sell for as much as they cost, it is no worse in respect to
+books than in respect to any other species of personal property. What
+chattel is there for which the buyer can get as much as he paid, even the
+next day? When it is proposed to transform the seller himself into the
+buyer of the same article, we find that the bull of yesterday is converted
+into the bear of to-day. Circumstances alter cases. I have bought a good
+many books and "objects of bigotry and virtue," and have sold some, and
+the nearest I ever came to getting as much as I paid was in the case of a
+rare print, the seller of which, after the lapse of several years,
+solicited me to let him have it again, at exactly what I paid for it, in
+order that he might sell it to some one else at an advance. I declined his
+offer with profuse thanks, and keep the picture as a curiosity.
+
+So I should say, as a rule, that books are not a good financial investment
+in the business sense, and speaking of most books and most buyers. Give
+a man the same experience in buying books that renders him expert in
+buying other personal property, the mere gross objects of trade, and let
+him set out with the purpose of accumulating a library that shall be a
+remunerative financial investment, and he may succeed, indeed, has often
+succeeded, certainly to the extent of getting back his outlay with
+interest, and sometimes making a handsome profit. But this needs
+experience. Just as one must build at least two houses before he can
+exactly suit himself, so he must collect two libraries before he can get
+one that will prove a fair investment in the vulgar sense of trade.
+
+I dare say that one will frequently pay more for a fine microscope or
+telescope than he can ever obtain for it if he desires or is pressed to
+sell it, but who would or should stop to think of that? The power of
+prying into the mysteries of the earth and the wonders of the heavens
+should raise one's thoughts above such petty considerations. So it should
+be in buying that which enables one to converse with Shakespeare or Milton
+or scan the works of Raphael or Durer. When the pioneer on the western
+plains purchases an expensive rifle he does not inquire whether he can
+sell it for what it costs; his purpose is to defend his house against
+Indians and other wild beasts. So the true book-buyer buys books to fight
+weariness, disgust, sorrow and despair; to loose himself from the world
+and forget time and all its limitations and besetments. In this view they
+never cost too much. And so when asked if book-collecting pays, I retort
+by asking, does piety pay? "Honesty is the best policy" is the meanest of
+maxims. Honesty ought to be a principle and not a policy; and
+book-collecting ought to be a means of education, refinement and
+enjoyment, and not a mode of financial investment.
+
+
+
+
+XIV.
+
+THE BOOK-WORM'S FAULTS.
+
+
+This is not a case of "Snakes in Iceland," for the Book-Worm has faults.
+One of his faults is his proneness to regard books as mere merchandise and
+not as vehicles of intellectual profit, that is to say, to be read. Too
+many collectors buy books simply for their rarity and with too little
+regard to the value of their contents. The Circassian slave-dealer does
+not care whether his girls can talk sense or not, and too many men buy
+books with a similar disregard to their capacity for instructing or
+entertaining. It seems to me that a man who buys books which he does not
+read, and especially such as he cannot read, merely on account of their
+value as merchandise, degrades the noble passion of bibliomania to the
+level of a trade. When I go through such a library I think of what
+Christ said to the traders in the Temple. Another fault is his lack of
+independence and his tendency to imitate the recognized leaders. He is too
+prone to buy certain books simply because another has them, and thus even
+rare collections are apt to fall into a tiresome routine. The collector
+who has a hobby and independence to ride it is admirable. Let him addict
+himself to some particular subject or era or "ana," and try to exhaust it,
+and before he is conscious he will have accumulated a collection precious
+for its very singularity. It strikes me that the best example of this
+idea that I have ever heard of is the attempt, in which two collectors in
+this country are engaged, to acquire the first or at least one specimen of
+every one of the five hundred fifteenth century printers. If this should
+ever succeed, the great libraries of all the world would be eager for it,
+and the undertaking is sufficiently arduous to last a lifetime.
+
+Sometimes out of this fault, sometimes independently of it, arises the
+fault by which book collecting degenerates into mere rivalry--the vulgar
+desire of display and ambition for a larger or rarer or costlier
+accumulation than one's neighbor has. The determination not to be
+outdone does not lend dignity or worth to the pursuit which would
+otherwise be commendable. During the late civil war in this country the
+chaplain of a regiment informed his colonel, who was not a godly person,
+that there was a hopeful revival of religion going on in a neighboring and
+rival regiment, and that forty men had been converted and baptized.
+"Dashed if I will submit to that," said the swearing colonel: "Adjutant,
+detail fifty men for baptism instantly!" So Mr. Roe, hearing that Mr. Doe
+has acquired a Caxton or other rarity of a certain height, and absolutely
+flawless except that the corners of the last leaf have been skillfully
+mended and that six leaves are slightly foxed, cannot rest night or day
+for envy, but is like the troubled sea until he can find a copy a
+sixteenth of an inch taller, the corners of whose leaves are in their
+pristine integrity, and over whose brilliant surface the smudge of the fox
+has not been cast, and then how high is his exaltation! Not that he cares
+anything for the book intrinsically, but he glories in having beaten
+Doe. Now if any speaks to him of Doe's remarkable copy, he can draw out
+his own and create a surprise in the bosom of Doe's adherent. The laurels
+of Miltiades no longer deprive him of rest. He has overcome in this
+trivial and childish strife concerning size and condition, and he holds
+the champion's belt for the present. He not only feels big himself but he
+has succeeded in making Doe feel small, which is still better. I don't
+know whether there will be any book-collecting in Mr. Bellamy's Utopia,
+but if there is, it will not be disfigured by such meanness, but
+collectors will go about striving to induce others to accept their
+superior copies and everything will be as lovely as in Heine's heaven,
+where geese fly around ready cooked, and if one treads on your corn it
+conveys a sensation of exquisite delight.
+
+It has been several times remarked by moralists that human nature is
+selfish. One of course does not expect another to relinquish to him his
+place in a "queue" at a box-office or his turn at a barber's shop, but in
+the noble and elegant pursuit of book-collecting it would be well to
+emulate the politeness of the French at Fontenoy, and hat in hand offer
+our antagonist the first shot. But I believe the only place where the
+Book-Worm ever does that is the auction room.
+
+
+    I no sooner come into the library, but I bolt the door to me,
+    excluding lust, ambition, avarice, and all such vices, whose nurse is
+    idleness, the mother of ignorance, and melancholy herself, and in the
+    very lap of eternity, among so many divine souls, I take my seat with
+    so lofty a spirit and sweet content, that I pity all our great ones
+    and rich men that know not this happiness.
+
+    --Heinsius.
+
+
+The modern Book-Worm is not the simple and absent-minded creature who went
+by this name a century ago or more. He is no mere antiquarian, Dryasdust
+or Dominie Sampson, but he is a sharp merchant, or a relentless broker, or
+a professional railroad wrecker, or a keen lawyer, or a busy physician, or
+a great manufacturer--a wide awake man of affairs, quite devoid of the
+conventional innocency and credulity which formerly made the name of
+Book-Worm suggestive of a necessity for a guardian or a committee in
+lunacy. No longer does he inquire, as Becatello inquired of Alphonso,
+King of Naples, which had done the better--Poggius, who sold a Livy,
+fairly writ in his own hand, to buy a country home near Florence, or he,
+who to buy a Livy had sold a piece of land? No longer is the scale turned
+in the negotiation of a treaty between princes by the weight of a rare
+book, as when Cosimo dei Medici persuaded King Alphonso of Naples to a
+peace by sending him a codex of Livy. No longer does the Book-Worm sit in
+his modest book-room, absorbed in his adored volumes, heedless of the
+waning lamp and the setting star, of hunger and thirst, unmindful of the
+scent of the clover wafted in at the window, deaf to the hum of the bees
+and the low of the kine, blind to the glow of sunsets and the soft contour
+of the blue hills, and the billowy swaying of the wheat field before the
+gentle breath of the south. No longer can it be said that
+
+  THE BOOK-WORM DOES NOT CARE FOR NATURE.
+
+  I feel no need of nature's flowers--
+    Of flowers of rhetoric I have store;
+  I do not miss the balmy showers--
+    When books are dry I o'er them pore.
+
+  Why should I sit upon a stile
+    And cause my aged bones to ache,
+  When I can all the hours beguile
+    With any style that I would take?
+
+  Why should I haunt a purling stream,
+    Or fish in miasmatic brook?
+  O'er Euclid's angles I can dream,
+    And recreation find in Hook.
+
+  Why should I jolt upon a horse
+    And after wretched vermin roam,
+  When I can choose an easier course
+    With Fox and Hare and Hunt at home?
+
+  Why should I scratch my precious skin
+    By crawling through a hawthorne hedge,
+  When Hawthorne, raking up my sin,
+    Stands tempting on the nearest ledge?
+
+  No need that I should take the trouble
+    To go abroad to walk or ride,
+  For I can sit at home and double
+    Quite up with pain from Akenside.
+
+The modern Book-Worm deals in sums of six figures; he keeps an agent "on
+the other side;" he cables his demands and his decisions; his name
+flutters the dovecotes in the auction-room; to him is proffered the first
+chance at a rarity worth a King's ransom; too busy to potter in person
+with such a trifle as the purchase of a Mazarine Bible, he hires others to
+do the hunting and he merely receives the game; the tiger skin and the
+elephant's tusk are laid at his feet to order, but he misses all the joy
+and ardor of the hunt. How different is all this from Sir Thomas
+Urquhart's account of his own library, of which he says: "There were not
+three works therein which were not of mine own purchase, and all of them
+together, in the order wherein I had ranked them, compiled like to a
+complete nosegay of flowers, which in my travels I had gathered out of the
+gardens of sixteen several kingdoms."
+
+Another fault of the Book-Worm is the affectation of collecting books on
+subjects in which he takes no practical interest, simply because it is the
+fashion or the books are intrinsically beautiful. Many a man has a fine
+collection on Angling, for example, who hardly knows how to put a worm on
+a hook, much less attach a fly. I fear I am one of these hypocritical
+creatures, for this is
+
+  HOW I GO A-FISHING.
+
+  Tis sweet to sit in shady nook,
+  Or wade in rapid crystal brook,
+  Impervious in rubber boots,
+  And wary of the slippery roots,
+  To snare the swift evasive trout
+  Or eke the sauntering horn-pout;
+  Or in the cold Canadian river
+  To see the glorious salmon quiver,
+  And them with tempting hook inveigle,
+  Fit viand for a table regal;
+  Or after an exciting bout
+  To snatch the pike with sharpened snout;
+  Or with some patient ass to row
+  To troll for bass with motion slow.
+  Oh! joy supreme when they appear
+  Splashing above the water clear,
+  And drawn reluctantly to land
+  Lie gasping on the yellow sand!
+  But sweeter far to read the books
+  That treat of flies and worms and hooks,
+  From Pickering's monumental page,
+  (Late rivalled by the rare Dean Sage),
+  And Major's elder issues neat,
+  To Burnand's funny "Incompleat."
+  I love their figures quaint and queer,
+  Which on the inviting page appear,
+  From those of good Dame Juliana,
+  Who lifts a fish and cries hosanna,
+  To those of Stothard, graceful Quaker,
+  Of fishy art supremest maker,
+  Whose fisherman, so dry and neat,
+  Would never soil a parlor seat.
+  I love them all, the books on angling,
+  And far from cares and business jangling,
+  Ensconced in cosy chimney-corner,
+  Like the traditional Jack Horner,
+  I read from Walton down to Lang,
+  And hum that song the Milkmaid sang.
+  I get not tired nor wet nor cross,
+  Nor suffer monetary loss--
+  If fish are shy and will not bite,
+  And shun the snare laid in their sight--
+  In order home at night to bring
+  A fraudulent, deceitful string,
+  And thus escape the merry jeers
+  Of heartless piscatory peers;
+  Nor have to listen to the lying
+  Of fishermen while fish are frying,
+  Who boast of draughts miraculous
+  Which prove too large a draught on us.
+  I spare the rod, and rods don't break;
+  Nor fish in sight the hook forsake;
+  My lines ne'er snap like corset laces;
+  My lines are fallen in pleasant places.
+  And so in sage experience ripe,
+  My fishery is but a type.
+
+
+
+
+XV.
+
+POVERTY AS A MEANS OF ENJOYMENT IN COLLECTING.
+
+
+Poor collectors are not only not at a disadvantage in enjoyment, but they
+have a positive advantage over affluent rivals. If I were rich, probably I
+should not throw my money away just to experience this superiority, but it
+nevertheless exists. I do not envy, but I commiserate my brother collector
+who has plenty of money. He who only has to draw his check to obtain his
+desire fails to reach the keenest bliss of the pursuit. If diamonds were
+as common as cobble stones there would be no delight in picking them up.
+
+To constitute a bibliomaniac in the true sense, the love of books must
+combine with a certain limitation of means for the gratification of the
+appetite. The consciousness of some extravagance must be always present
+in his mind; there must be a sense of sacrifice in the attainment; in a
+rich man the disease cannot exist; he cannot enter the kingdom of the
+Bibliomaniac's heaven. There is the same difference of sensation between
+the acquirement of books by a wealthy man and by him of slender purse,
+that there is between the taking of fish in a net and the successful
+result of a long angling pursuit after one especially fat and evasive
+trout. When a prince kills his preserved game, with keepers to raise it
+for him and to hand him guns ready loaded, so that all he has to do is to
+squint and pull the trigger, this is not hunting; it is mere vulgar
+butchery. What knows he of the joys of the tramper in the forest, who
+stalks the deer, or scares up smaller game, singly, and has to work hard
+for his bag? We read in Dibdin's sumptuous pages of the celebrated contest
+between the Duke of Devonshire and the Marquis of Blandford for the
+possession of the Valdarfar Decameron; we read with admiration, but we
+also read of the immortal battle of Elia with the little squab-keeper of
+the old book-stall in Ninety-four alley, over the ownership of a ragged
+duodecimo for a sixpence; we read with affection. So we read Leigh
+Hunt's confession that when he "cut open a new catalogue of old books, and
+put crosses against dozens of volumes in the list, out of the pure
+imagination of buying them, the possibility being out of the question."
+Poverty hath her victories no less renowned than wealth. To haunt the
+book-stores, there to see a long-desired work in luxurious and tempting
+style, reluctantly to abandon it for the present on account of the price;
+to go home and dream about it, to wonder, for a year, and perchance
+longer, whether it will ever again greet your eyes; to conjecture what act
+of desperation you might in heat of passion commit toward some more
+affluent man in whose possession you should thereafter find it; to see it
+turn up again in another book-shop, its charms slightly faded, but yet
+mellowed by age, like those of your first love, met in later life--with
+this difference, however, that whereas you crave those of the book more
+than ever, you are generally quite satisfied with yourself for not having,
+through the greenness of youth, yielded untimely to those of the lady; to
+ask with assumed indifference the price, and learn with ill-dissembled joy
+that it is now within your means; to say you'll take it; to place it
+beneath your arm, and pay for it (or more generally order it "charged");
+to go forth from that room with feelings akin to those of Ulysses when he
+brought away the Palladium from Troy; to keep a watchful eye on the parcel
+in the railway coach on your way home, or to gloat over the treasures of
+its pages, and wonder if the other passengers have any suspicion of your
+good fortune; and finally to place the volume on your shelf, and
+thenceforth to call it your own--this is indeed a pleasure denied to the
+affluent, so keen as to be akin to pain, and only marred by the palling
+which always follows possession and the presentation of your book-seller's
+account three months afterwards.
+
+
+
+
+XVI.
+
+THE ARRANGEMENT OF BOOKS.
+
+
+There was a time when I loved to see my books arranged with a view to
+uniformity of height and harmony of color without respect to subjects.
+That time I regard as my vealy period. That was the time when we admired
+"Somnambula," and when the housewife used to have all the pictures hung on
+the same level, and to buy vases in pairs exactly alike and put them on
+either side of the parlor clock, which was generally surmounted by a
+prancing Saracen or a weaving Penelope. Granting that a collection is not
+extensive enough to demand a strict arrangement by subjects, I like to see
+a little artistic confusion--high and low together here and there, like a
+democratic community; now and then some giants laid down on their sides to
+rest; the shelves not uniformly filled out as if the owner never expected
+to buy any more, and alongside a dainty Angler a book in red or blue cloth
+with a white label--just as childred in velvet and furs sit next a
+newsboy, or a little girl in calico with a pigtail at Sunday School, or as
+beggars and princes kneel side by side on the cathedral pavement. It is
+good to have these "swell" books rub up against the commoners, which
+though not so elegant are frequently a great deal brighter. At a country
+funeral I once heard the undertaker say to the bearers, "size yourselves
+off." There is no necessity or artistic gain in such a ceremony in a
+library, and a departure from stiff uniformity is quite agreeable. Then
+I do not care to have the book cases all of the same height, nor even of
+the same kind of wood, nor to have them all "dwarfs," with bric-a-brac on
+the top. I would rather have more books on top. In short, it is pleasant
+to have the collection remind one in a way of Topsy--not that it was
+"born," but "growed" and is expected to grow more. There is a modern
+notion of considering a library as a room rather than as a collection of
+books, and of making the front drawing-room the library, which is
+heretical in the eyes of a true Book-Worm. This is probably an invention
+of the women of the house to prevent any additions to the books without
+their knowledge, and to discourage book-buying. We have surrendered too
+much to our wives in this; they demand book cases as furniture and to
+serve as shelves, without any regard to the interior contents or whether
+there are any, except for the color of the bindings and the regularity of
+the rows. All of us have thus seen "libraries" without books worthy the
+name, and book-cases sometimes with exquisite silk curtains, carefully and
+closely drawn, arousing the suspicion that there were no books behind
+them. My ideal library is a room given up to books, all by itself, at
+the top or in the rear of the house, where "company" cannot break through
+and say to me, "I know you are a great man to buy books--have you seen
+that beautiful limited holiday edition of Ben Hur, with illustrations?"
+
+
+
+
+XVII.
+
+ENEMIES OF BOOKS.
+
+
+Mr. Blades regards as "Enemies of Books" fire, water, gas, heat, dust and
+neglect, ignorance and bigotry, the worm, beetles, bugs and rats,
+book-binders, collectors, servants and children. He does not include
+women, borrowers, or thieves. Perhaps he considers them rather as enemies
+of the book-owners. The worm is not always to be considered an enemy to
+authors, although he may be to books. James Payn, in speaking of the
+recent discovery, in the British Museum, of a copy on papyrus of the
+humorous poems of the obscure Greek poet, Herodles, says: "The humorous
+poems of Herodles possess, however, the immense advantage of being
+'seriously mutilated by worms'; wherever therefore an hiatus occurs, the
+charitable and cultured mind will be enabled to conclude that (as in the
+case of a second descent upon a ball supper) the 'best things' have been
+already devoured." It was doubtless to guard against thieves that the
+ancient books were chained up in the monasteries, but the practice was
+effectual also against borrowers. De Bury, in his "Philobiblon" has a
+chapter entitled "A Provident Arrangement by which his Books may be lent
+to Strangers," in which the utmost leniency is to lend duplicate books
+upon ample security. Not to adopt the harsh judgment of an ancient
+author, who says, "to lend a book is to lose it, and borrowing but a
+hypocritical pretense for stealing," we may conclude, in a word, that to
+lend a book is like the Presidency of the United States, to be neither
+desired nor refused. Collectors are not so much exposed to the ravages of
+thieves as book-sellers are, and a book-thief ought to be regarded with
+leniency for his good taste and his reliance on the existence of culture
+in others. After all, it is one's own fault if he lends a book. One
+should as soon think of lending one of his children, unless he has
+duplicate or triplicate daughters. It would be difficult to foretell what
+would happen to a man who should propose to borrow a rare book. Perhaps
+death by freezing would be the safest prediction. Although Grolier stamped
+"et amicorum" on his books, that did not mean that he would lend them, but
+only that his friends were free of them at his house. It is amusing to
+note, in Mr. Castle's monograph on Book-Plates, how many of them indicate
+a stern purpose not to lend books. Mr. Gosse regards book-plates as a
+precaution not only against thieves, but against borrowers. He observes of
+the man who does not adopt a book-plate: "Such a man is liable to great
+temptations. He is brought face to face with that enemy of his species,
+the borrower, and does not speak with him in the gate. If he had a
+book-plate he would say, 'Oh! certainly I will lend you this volume, if it
+has not my book-plate in it; of course one makes it a rule never to lend
+a book that has.' He would say this and feign to look inside the volume,
+knowing right well that this safeguard against the borrower is there
+already." One may make a gift of a book to a friend, but there is as much
+difference between giving a book and lending one as there is between
+indorsing a note and giving the money. I have considerable respect for and
+sympathy with a good honest book-thief. He holds out no false hopes and
+makes no false pretences. But the borrower who does not return adds
+hypocrisy and false pretences to other crime. He ought to be committed to
+the State prison for life, and put at keeping the books of the
+institution. In a buried temple in Cnidos, in 1857, Mr. Newton found rolls
+of lead hung up, on which were inscribed spells devoting enemies to the
+infernal gods for sundry specified offenses, among which was the failure
+to return a borrowed garment. On which Agnes Repplier says: "Would that
+it were given to me now to inscribe, and by inscribing doom, all those who
+have borrowed and failed to return our books; would that by scribbling
+some strong language on a piece of lead we could avenge the lamentable
+gaps on our shelves, and send the ghosts of the wrong-doers howling
+dismally into the eternal shades of Tartarus."
+
+I have spoken of a certain amount of sympathy as due from a magnanimous
+book-owner toward a pilferer of such wares. This is always on the
+condition that he steals to add to his own hoard and not for mere
+pecuniary gain. The following is suggested as a Christian mode of dealing
+with
+
+  THE BOOK-THIEF.
+
+      Ah, gentle thief!
+  I marked the absent-minded air
+  With which you tucked away my rare
+      Book in your pocket.
+
+      'Twas past belief--
+  I saw you near the open case,
+  But yours was such an honest face
+      I did not lock it.
+
+      I knew you lacked
+  That one to make your set complete,
+  And when that book you chanced to meet
+      You recognized it.
+
+      And when attacked
+  By rage of bibliophilic greed,
+  You prigged that small Quantin Ovide,
+      Although I prized it.
+
+      I will not sue,
+  Nor bring your family to shame
+  By giving up your honored name
+      To heartless prattle.
+
+      I'll visit you,
+  And under your unwary eyes
+  Secrete and carry off the prize,
+      My ravished chattel.
+
+It greatly rejoices me to observe that Mr. Blades does not include tobacco
+among the enemies of books. In one sense tobacco may be ranked as a
+book-enemy, for self-denial in this regard may furnish a man with a good
+library in a few years. I have known a very pretty collection made out of
+the ordinary smoke-offerings of twenty years. Undoubtedly there are
+libraries so fine that smoking in them would be discountenanced, but mine
+is not impervious to the pipe or cigar, and I entertain the pleasing fancy
+that tobacco-smoke is good for books, disinfects them, and keeps them free
+from the destroying worm. As I do not myself smoke, I like to see my
+friends taking their ease in my book-room, with the "smoke of their
+torment ascending" above my modest volumes. I know how they feel, without
+incurring the expense, and so to them I indite and dedicate
+
+  THE SMOKE TRAVELLER.
+
+  When I puff my cigarette,
+      Straight I see a Spanish girl,
+      Mantilla, fan, coquettish curl,
+      Languid airs and dimpled face,
+      Calculating fatal grace;
+      Hear a twittering serenade
+      Under lofty balcony played;
+      Queen at bull-fight, naught she cares
+      What her agile lover dares;
+  She can love and quick forget.
+
+  Let me but my meerschaum light,
+      I behold a bearded man,
+      Built upon capacious plan,
+      Sabre-slashed in war or duel,
+      Gruff of aspect but not cruel,
+      Metaphysically muddled,
+      With strong beer a little fuddled,
+      Slow in love and deep in books,
+      More sentimental than he looks,
+  Swears new friendships every night.
+
+  Let me my chibouk enkindle,--
+      In a tent I'm quick set down
+      With a Bedouin lean and brown,
+      Plotting gain of merchandise,
+      Or perchance of robber prize;
+      Clumsy camel load upheaving,
+      Woman deftly carpet weaving;
+      Meal of dates and bread and salt,
+      While in azure heavenly vault
+  Throbbing stars begin to dwindle.
+
+  Glowing coal in clay dudheen
+      Carries me to sweet Killarney,
+      Full of hypocritic blarney;
+      Huts with babies, pigs and hens
+      Mixed together; bogs and fens;
+      Shillalahs, praties, usquebaugh,
+      Tenants defying hated law,
+      Fair blue eyes with lashes black,
+      Eyes black and blue from cudgel-thwack,--
+  So fair, so foul, is Erin green.
+
+  My nargileh once inflamed,
+      Quick appears a Turk with turban,
+      Girt with guards in palace urban,
+      Or in house by summer sea
+      Slave-girls dancing languidly;
+      Bow-string, sack and bastinado,
+      Black boats darting in the shadow;
+      Let things happen as they please,
+      Whether well or ill at ease,
+  Fate alone is blessed or blamed.
+
+  With my ancient calumet
+      I can raise a wigwam's smoke,
+      And the copper tribe invoke,--
+      Scalps and wampum, bows and knives,
+      Slender maidens, greasy wives,
+      Papoose hanging on a tree,
+      Chieftains squatting silently,
+      Feathers, beads and hideous paint,
+      Medicine-man and wooden saint,--
+  Forest-framed the vision set.
+
+  My cigar breeds many forms--
+      Planter of the rich Havana,
+      Mopping brow with sheer bandanna;
+      Russian prince in fur arrayed;
+      Paris fop on dress parade;
+      London swell just after dinner;
+      Wall Street broker--gambling sinner;
+      Delver in Nevada mine;
+      Scotch laird bawling "Auld Lang Syne;"
+  Thus Raleigh's weed my fancy warms.
+
+  Life's review in smoke goes past.
+      Fickle fortune, stubborn fate,
+      Right discovered all too late,
+      Beings loved and gone before,
+      Beings loved but friends no more,
+      Self-reproach and futile sighs,
+      Vanity in birth that dies,
+      Longing, heart-break, adoration,--
+      Nothing sure in expectation
+  Save ash-receiver at the last.
+
+In the early history of New England, when the town of Deerfield was burned
+by the Indians, Captain Dunstan, who was the father of a large family,
+deeming discretion the better part of valor, made up his mind to run for
+it and to take one child (as a sample, probably), that being all he could
+safely carry on his horse. But on looking about him, he could not
+determine which child to take, and so observing to his wife, "All or
+none," he set her and the baby on the horse, and brought up the rear on
+foot with his gun, and fended off the redskins and brought the whole
+family into safety. Such is the tale, and in the old primer there was a
+picture of the scene--although I do not understand that it was taken from
+the life, and the story reflects small credit on the character of the
+aborigines for enterprise.
+
+I have often conjectured which of my books I would save in case of fire in
+my library, and whether I should care to rescue any if I could not bring
+off all. Perhaps the problem would work itself out as follows:
+
+  THE FIRE IN THE LIBRARY.
+
+  Twas just before midnight a smart conflagration
+    Broke out in my dwelling and threatened my books;
+  Confounded and dazed with a great consternation
+    I gazed at my treasures with pitiful looks.
+
+  "Oh! which shall I rescue?" I cried in deep feeling;
+    I wished I were armed like Briareus of yore,
+  While sharper and sharper the flames kept revealing
+    The sight of my bibliographical store.
+
+  "My Lamb may remain to be thoroughly roasted,
+    My Crabbe to be broiled and my Bacon to fry,
+  My Browning accustomed to being well toasted,
+    And Waterman Taylor rejoicing to dry."
+
+  At hazard I grasped at the rest of my treasure,
+    And crammed all pockets with dainty eighteens;
+  I packed up a pillow case, heaping good measure,
+    And turned me away from the saddest of scenes.
+
+  But slowly departing, my face growing sadder,
+    At leaving old favorites behind me so far,
+  A feminine voice from the foot of the ladder
+    Cried, "Bring down my Cook-Book and Harper's Bazar!"
+
+It has been hereinbefore intimated that women may be classed among the
+enemies of books. There is at least one time of the year when every
+Book-Worm thinks so, and that is the dread period of
+house-cleaning--sometimes in the spring, sometimes in the autumn, and
+sometimes, in the case of excessively finical housewives, in both. That
+is the time looked forward to by him with apprehension and looked back
+upon with horror, because the poor fellow knows what comes of
+
+  CLEANING THE LIBRARY.
+
+  With traitorous kiss remarked my spouse,
+    "Remain down town to lunch to-day,
+  For we are busy cleaning house,
+    And you would be in Minnie's way."
+
+  When I came home that fateful night,
+    I found within my sacred room
+  The wretched maid had wreaked her spite
+    With mop and pail and witch's broom.
+
+  The books were there, but oh how changed!
+    They startled me with rare surprises,
+  For they had all been rearranged,
+    And less by subjects than by sizes.
+
+  Some volumes numbered right to left,
+    And some were standing on their heads,
+  And some were of their mates bereft,
+    And some behind for refuge fled.
+
+  The women brave attempts had made
+    At placing cognate books together;--
+  They looked like strangers close arrayed
+    Under a porch in stormy weather.
+
+  She watched my face--that spouse of mine--
+    Some approbation there to glean,
+  But seeing I did not incline
+    To praise, remarked, "I've got it clean."
+
+  And so she had--and also wrong;
+    She little knew--she was but thirty--
+  I entertained a preference strong
+    To have it right, though ne'er so dirty.
+
+  That wife of mine has much good sense,
+    To chide her would have been inhuman,
+  And it would be a great expense
+    To graft the book-sense on a woman.
+
+Such are my reflections when I consider a fire in my own little library.
+But when I regard the great and growing mass of books with which the earth
+groans, and reflect how few of them are necessary or original, and how
+little the greater part of them would be missed, I sometimes am led to
+believe that a general conflagration of them might in the long run be a
+blessing to mankind, by the stimulation of thought and the deliverance of
+authors from the influence of tradition and the habit of imitation. When I
+am in this mood I incline to think that much is
+
+  ODE TO OMAR.
+
+  Omar, who burned (or did not burn)
+    The Alexandrian tomes,
+  I would erect to thee an urn
+    Beneath Sophia's domes.
+
+  So many books I can't endure--
+    The dull and commonplace,
+  The dirty, trifling and obscure,
+    The realistic race.
+
+  Would that thy exemplary torch
+    Could bravely blaze again,
+  And many manufactories scorch
+    Of book-inditing men.
+
+  The poets who write "dialect,"
+    Maudlin and coarse by turns,
+  Most ardently do I expect
+    Thou'lt wither up with Burns.
+
+  All the erratic, yawping class
+    Condemn with judgment stern,
+  Walt Whitman's awful "Leaves of Grass"
+    With elegant Swinburne.
+
+  Of commentators make a point,
+    The carping, blind, and dry;
+  Rend the "Baconians" joint by joint,
+    And throw them on to fry.
+
+  Especially I'd have thee choke
+    Law libraries in sheep
+  With fire derived from ancient Coke,
+    And sink in ashes deep.
+
+  Destroy the sheep--don't save my own--
+    I weary of the cram,
+  The misplaced diligence I've shown--
+    But kindly spare my Lamb.
+
+  Fear not to sprinkle on the pyre
+    The woes of "Esther Waters";
+  They'll only make the flame soar higher,
+    And warn Eve's other daughters.
+
+  But 'ware of Howells and of James,
+    Of Trollope and his rout;
+  They'd dampen down the fiercest flames
+    And put your fire out.
+
+
+
+
+XVIII.
+
+LIBRARY COMPANIONS.
+
+
+As a rule I do not care for any constant human companion in my library,
+but I do not object to a cat or a small dog. That picture of Montaigne,
+drawn by himself, amusing his cat with a garter, or that other one of
+Doctor Johnson feeding oysters to his cat Hodge, is a very pleasing one.
+In my library hangs Durer's picture of St. Jerome in his cell, busy with
+his writing, and a dog and a lion quietly dozing together in the
+foreground. As I am no saint I have never been able to keep a lion in my
+library for any great length of time, but I have maintained a dog there.
+Lamb even contended that his books were the better for being dog's-eared,
+but I do not go so far as that. Nor do I pretend that his presence will
+prevent the books from becoming foxed. Here is a portrait of
+
+  MY DOG.
+
+  He is a trifling, homely beast,
+  Of no use, or the very least;
+  To shake imaginary rat
+  Or bark for hours at china cat;
+  To lie at head of stairs and start,
+  Like animated, woolly dart,
+  Upon a non-existent foe;
+  Or on hind legs like monkey go,
+  To beg for sugar or for bone;
+  Never content to be alone;
+  To bask for hours in the sun.
+  Rolled up till head and tail are one;
+  Usurping all the softest places
+  And keeping them with doggish graces;
+  To sneak between the housemaid's feet
+  And scour unnoticed on the street;
+  Wag indefatigable tail;
+  Cajole with piteous human wail;
+  To dance with dainty dandy air
+  When nicely parted is his hair,
+  And look most ancient and dejected
+  When it has been too long neglected;
+  To sleep upon my book-den rug
+  And dream of battle with a pug;
+  To growl with counterfeited rabies;
+  To be more trouble than twin babies;--
+  These are the qualities and tricks
+  That in my heart his image fix;
+  And so in cursory, doggerel rhyme
+  I celebrate him in his time,
+  Nor wait his virtues to rehearse
+  In cold obituary verse.
+
+There is one other speaking companion that I would tolerate in my library,
+and that is a clock. I have a number of clocks in mine, and if it were not
+for their unanimous and warning voice I might forget to go to bed.
+Perhaps my reader would like to hear an account of
+
+  MY CLOCKS.
+
+  Five clocks adorn my domicile
+    And give me occupation,
+  For moments else inane I fill
+    With their due regulation.
+
+  Four of these clocks, on each Lord's Day,
+    As regular as preaching,
+  I wind and set, so that they may
+    The flight of time be teaching.
+
+  My grandfather's old clock is chief,
+    With foolish moon-faced dial;
+  Procrastination is a thief
+    It always brings to trial.
+
+  Its height is as the tallest men,
+    Its pendulum beats slow,
+  And when its awful bell booms ten,
+    Young men get up and go.
+
+  Another clock is bronze and gilt,
+    Penelope sits on it,
+  And in her fingers holds a quilt--
+    How strange 'tis not a bonnet!
+
+  Memorial of those weary years
+    When she the web unravelled,
+  While Ithacus choked down his fears
+    And slow from Ilium travelled.
+
+  Ceres upon the third, with spray
+    Of grain, in classic gown,
+  Seems sadly to recall the day
+    Proserpine sank down,
+
+  With scarcely time to say good-bye,
+    Unto the world of Dis;
+  And keeps account, with many a sigh,
+    Of harvest time in this.
+
+  Another clock is rococo,
+    Of Louis Sept or Seize,
+  With many a dreadful furbelow
+    An artist's hair to raise,
+
+  Suggestions of a giddy court,
+    With fan and boufflant bustle,
+  When silken trains made gallant sport
+    And o'er the floor did rustle.
+
+  The fourth was brought, in foolish trust
+    From Alpland far away,
+  A baby clock, and so it must
+    Be tended every day.
+
+  Importunate and trivial thing!
+    Thou katydid of clocks!
+  Defying all my skill to bring
+    Right time from out thy box.
+
+  With works of wood and face of brass
+    On which queer cherubs play,
+  The tedious hours thou well dost pass,
+    And none thy chirp gainsay.
+
+Among the silent companions in my study are the effigies of the four
+greatest geniuses of modern times in the realms of literature, art, music
+and war--a print of Shakespeare; one of Michael Angelo's corrugated face
+with its broken nose; a bust of Beethoven, resembling a pouting lion; and
+a print of Napoleon at St. Helena, representing him dressed in a white
+duck suit, with a broad-brimmed straw hat, and sitting looking seaward,
+with those unfathomable eyes, a newspaper lying in his lap. Unhappy
+faces all except the first--his cheerful, probably because he has effected
+an arrangement with an otherwise idle person, named Bacon, to do all his
+work for him. But there is another portrait, at which I look oftener, the
+original of which probably takes more interest in me, but is unknown to
+every visitor to my study. I myself have not seen her in half a century.
+I call it simply
+
+  A PORTRAIT.
+
+  A gentle face is ever in my room,
+    With features fine and melancholy eyes,
+  Though young, a little past life's freshest bloom,
+    And always with air of sad surmise.
+
+  A great white cap almost conceals her hair,
+    A collar broad falls o'er her shoulders slender;
+  The fashion of a bygone age an air
+    Of quaintness to her simple garb doth render.
+
+  Those hazel eyes pursue me as I move
+    And seem to watch my busy toiling pen;
+  They hold me with an anxious yearning love,
+    As if she dwelt upon the earth again.
+
+  My mother's portrait! fifty years ago,
+    When I was but a heedless happy boy,
+  The influence of her being ceased to flow,
+    And she laid down life's burden and its joy.
+
+  And now as I sit pondering o'er my books,
+    So vainly seeking a receding rest,
+  I read the wonder in her steadfast looks:
+    "Is this my son who lay upon my breast?"
+
+  And when for me there is an end of time,
+    And this unsatisfying work is done,
+  If I shall meet thee in thy peaceful clime,
+    Young mother, wilt thou know thy gray-haired son?
+
+There is one other work of art which adorns my library--a medallion by a
+dear friend of mine, an eminent sculptor, the story of which I will put
+into his mouth. He calls the face
+
+  MY SCHOOLMATE.
+
+  The snows have settled on my head
+    But not upon my heart,
+  And incidents of years long fled
+    From out my memory start.
+  My hand is cunning to contrive
+    The shapes my brain invents,
+  And keep in marble forms alive
+    That which my soul contents;
+  And I have wife, and children tall,
+    Grandchildren cluster near,
+  And sweet the applause of men doth fall
+    On my undeafened ear.
+  But still my mind will backward turn
+    For half a century,
+  And without reasoning will yearn
+    For sight or news of thee,
+  Thou playmate of my boyhood days,
+    When life was all aglow,
+  When the sweetest thing was thy girlish praise,
+    As I drew thee o'er the snow
+  To the old red school-house by the road,
+    Where we learned to spell and read,
+  When thou wert all my fairy load
+    And I was thy prancing steed.
+
+  Oh! thou wert simple then and fair.
+    Artless and unconstrained,
+  With quaintly knotted auburn hair
+    From which the wind refrained,
+  And from thine earnest steady eyes
+    Shone out a nature pure,
+  Formed by kind Heaven, a man's best prize,
+    To love and to endure.
+
+  Oh! art thou still in life and time,
+    Or hast thou gone before?
+  And hath thy lot been like to mine,
+    Or pinched and bare and sore?
+  And didst thou marry, or art thou
+    Still of the spinster tribe?
+  Perchance thou art a widow now,
+    Steeled against second bribe?
+  Do grandsons round thy hearthstone play,
+    Or dost thou end thy race?
+  And could that auburn hair grow gray,
+    And wrinkles line thy face?
+  I cannot make thee old and plain--
+    I would not if I could--
+  And I recall thee without stain,
+    Simply and sweetly good;
+  And I have carved thy pretty head
+    And hung it on my wall,
+  And to all men let it be said,
+    I like it best of all;
+  For on a far-off snowy road,
+    Before I had learned to read,
+  Thou wert all my fairy load
+    And I was thy prancing steed!
+
+I have reserved my queerest library companion till the last. It is not a
+book, although it is good for nothing but to read. It is not an autograph,
+although it is simply the name of an individual. It is my office sign
+which I have cherished, as a memento of busier days. Some singular
+reflections are roused when I gaze at
+
+  MY SHINGLE.
+
+  My shingle is battered and old,
+    No longer deciphered with ease,
+  So I've taken it in from the cold,
+    And fastened it up on a frieze.
+
+  A long generation ago,
+    With feelings of singular pride
+  I regarded its glittering show,
+    And pointed it out to my bride.
+
+  Companions of youth have grown few,
+    Its loves and aversions are faint;
+  No spirit to make friends anew--
+    An old enemy seems like a saint.
+
+  My clients have paid the last fee
+    For passage in Charon's sad boat,
+  Imposing no duty on me
+    Save to utter this querelous note;
+
+  And still as I toil in life's mills,
+    In loneliness growing profound,
+  To attend on the proof of their wills
+    And swear that their wits were quite sound!
+
+  So I work with the scissors and pen,
+    And to show of old courage a spark,
+  I must utter a jest now and then,
+    Like whistling of boys in the dark.
+
+  I tack my old friend on the wall,
+    So that infantile grandson of mine
+  May not think, if my life he recall,
+    That I died without making a sign.
+
+  When at court on the great judgment day
+    With penitent suitors I mingle,
+  May my guilt be washed cleanly away,
+    Like that on my faded old shingle!
+
+Of course my chief occupation in my library is reading and writing. To be
+sure, I do a good deal of thinking there. But there is another occupation
+which I practice to a great extent, which does not involve reading or
+writing at all, nor thinking to any considerable degree. That is playing
+solitaire. I play only one kind of this and that I have played for many
+years. It requires two packs of cards, and requires building on the aces
+and kings, and so I have them tacked down on a lap-board to save picking
+out and laying down every time. This particular game is called "St.
+Elba," probably because Napoleon did not play it, and it can be "won" once
+in about sixty trials. I do not care for card-playing with others, but I
+have certain reasons for liking
+
+  SOLITAIRE.
+
+  I like to play cards with a man of sense,
+    And allow him to play with me,
+  And so it has grown a delight intense
+    To play solitaire on my knee.
+
+  I love the quaint form of the sceptered king,
+    The simplicity of the ace,
+  The stolid knave like a wooden thing,
+    And her majesty's smirking face.
+
+  Diamonds, aces, and clubs and spades--
+    Their garb of respectable black
+  A moiety brilliant of red invades,
+    As they mingle in motley pack.
+
+  Independent of anyone's signal or leave,
+    Relieved from the bluffing of poker,
+  I've no apprehension of ace up a sleeve,
+    And fear no superfluous joker.
+
+  I build up and down; all the cards I hold,
+    And the game is always fair,
+  For I am honest, and so is my old
+    Companion at solitaire.
+
+  Let kings condescend to the lower grades,
+    Queens glitter with diamonds rare,
+  Knaves flourish their clubs, and peasants wield spades,
+    But give me my solitaire.
+
+
+
+
+XIX.
+
+THE FRIENDSHIP OF BOOKS.
+
+
+To many peaceful men of the legal robe the companionship of books is
+inexpressibly dear. What a privilege it is to summon the greatest and most
+charming spirits of the past from their graves, and find them always
+willing to talk to us! How delightful to go to our well-known
+book-shelves, lay hands on our favorite authors--even in the dark, so well
+do we know them--take any volume, open it at any page, and in a few
+minutes lose all sense and remembrance of the real world, with its strife,
+its bitterness, its disappointments, its hollowness, its unfaithfulness,
+its selfishness, in the pictures of an ideal world! The real world, do we
+say? Which is the real world, that of history or that of fiction? In this
+age of historic doubt and iconoclasm, are not the heroes of our favorite
+romances much more real than those of history? Captain Ed'ard Cuttle,
+mariner, is much more real to us than Captain Joseph Cook; Cooper's Two
+Admirals than the great Nelson; Leather-Stocking than the yellow-haired
+Custer; Henry Esmond than any of the Pretenders; Hester Prynne and Becky
+Sharp than Catherine of Russia or Aspasia or Lucrezia; Sidney Carton than
+Philip Sidney. Even the kings and heroes who have lived in history live
+more vividly for us in romance. We know the crooked Richard and the
+crafty Louis XI. most familiarly, if not most accurately, through
+Shakespeare and Scott; and where in history do we get so haunting a
+picture of the great Napoleon and Waterloo as in Victor Hugo's wondrous
+but inaccurate chapter? Happy is the man who has for his associates David,
+Solomon, Job, Paul, and John, in spite of the assaults of modern criticism
+upon the Scriptures! No one can shake our faith in Don Quixote, although
+the accounts of the Knight "without fear and without reproach" are so
+short and vague. There is no doubt about the travels of Christian,
+although those of Stanley may be questioned. The Vicar of Wakefield is a
+much more actual personage than Peter who preached the Crusades. Sir Roger
+de Coverley and his squire life are much more probable to us than Sir
+William Temple in his gardens. There is no character in romance who has
+not or might not have lived, but we are thrown into grave doubts of the
+saintly Washington and the devilish Napoleon depicted three quarters of a
+century ago. We cast history aside in scepticism and disgust; we cling to
+romance with faith and delight. "The things that are seen are temporal;
+the things that are not seen are eternal." So let the writer hereof sing a
+song in praise of
+
+  MY FRIENDS THE BOOKS.
+
+  Friends of my youth and of my age
+    Within my chamber wait,
+  Until I fondly turn the page
+    And prove them wise and great.
+
+  At me they do not rudely glare
+    With eye that luster lacks,
+  But knowing how I hate a stare,
+    Politely turn their backs.
+
+  They never split my head with din,
+    Nor snuffle through their noses,
+  Nor admiration seek to win
+    By inartistic poses.
+
+  If I should chance to fall asleep,
+    They do not scowl or snap,
+  But prudently their counsel keep
+    Till I have had my nap.
+
+  And if I choose to rout them out
+    Unseasonably at night,
+  They do not chafe nor curse nor pout,
+    But rise all clothed and bright.
+
+  They ne'er intrude with silly say,
+    They never scold nor worry;
+  They ne'er suspect and ne'er betray,
+    They're never in a hurry.
+
+  Anacreon never gets quite full,
+    Nor Horace too flirtatious;
+  Swift makes due fun of Johnny Bull,
+    And Addison is gracious.
+
+  Saint-Simon and Grammont rehearse
+    Their tales of court with glee;
+  For all their scandal I'm no worse,--
+    They never peach on me.
+
+  For what I owe Montaigne, no dread
+    To meet him on the morrow;
+  And better still, it must be said,
+    He never wants to borrow.
+
+  Paul never asks, though sure to preach,
+    Why I don't come to church;
+  Though Dr. Johnson strives to teach,
+    I do not fear his birch.
+
+  My Dickens never is away
+    Whene'er I choose to call;
+  I need not wait for Thackeray
+    In chill palatial hall.
+
+  I help to bring Amelia to,
+    Who always is a-fainting;
+  I love the Oxford graduate who
+    Explains great Turner's painting.
+
+  My memory is full of graves
+    Of friends in days gone by;
+  But Time these sweet companions saves,--
+    These friends who never die!
+
+
+
+
+  SO HERE ENDETH "IN THE TRACK OF THE
+  BOOK-WORM." PRINTED BY ME, ELBERT
+  HUBBARD, AT THE ROYCROFT SHOP IN
+  EAST AURORA, N. Y., U. S. A., AND
+  COMPLETED THIS TWENTY-SIXTH DAY OF
+  JUNE, MDCCCXCVII.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg's In the Track of the Bookworm, by Irving Browne
+
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of In the Track of the Bookworm, by Irving Browne
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
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+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: In the Track of the Bookworm
+
+Author: Irving Browne
+
+Release Date: July 17, 2011 [EBook #36764]
+
+Language: English
+
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+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK IN THE TRACK OF THE BOOKWORM ***
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+
+
+<p class="title"><span class="huge">IN THE TRACK OF THE BOOK-WORM</span> <img src="images/arrow_leaf.jpg" alt="" />
+<span class="large">by Irving Browne: thoughts,
+fancies and gentle gibes on Collecting and
+Collectors <img src="images/arrow_leaf.jpg" alt="" /> by one of them.<img src="images/img_pg001b.jpg" alt="" /></span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg001c.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p class="center">DONE INTO A BOOK AT THE ROYCROFT<br />
+PRINTING SHOP AT EAST AURORA,<br />
+NEW YORK, U. S. A.<br />
+MDCCCXCVII</p>
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg001d.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p class="center">Copyrighted by<br />
+The Roycroft Printing Shop<br />1897</p>
+
+
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<div class="note">
+<p style="color: maroon;">Of this edition but five hundred and ninety copies were printed and types
+then distributed. Each copy is signed and numbered and this book is number <img src="images/num173.jpg" alt="173" /></p>
+
+<p class="right"><img src="images/ibrowne.jpg" alt="Irving Browne" /></p></div>
+
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<h2><span style="color: maroon;">CHAPTERS.</span></h2>
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/red_clover.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#I">1.</a></td><td>Objects of Collection</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_9">9</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#II">2.</a></td><td>Who Have Collected</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_11">11</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#III">3.</a></td><td>Diverse Tastes</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_18">18</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#IV">4.</a></td><td>The Size of Books</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_21">21</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#V">5.</a></td><td>Binding</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_25">25</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#VI">6.</a></td><td>Paper</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_32">32</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#VII">7.</a></td><td>Women as Collectors</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_36">36</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#VIII">8.</a></td><td>The Illustrator</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_47">47</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#IX">9.</a></td><td>Book-Plates</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_66">66</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#X">10.</a></td><td>The Book-Auctioneer</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_73">73</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#XI">11.</a></td><td>The Book-Seller</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_77">77</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#XII">12.</a></td><td>The Public Librarian</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_84">84</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#XIII">13.</a></td><td>Does Book Collecting Pay</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_88">88</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#XIV">14.</a></td><td>The Book-Worm&#8217;s Faults</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_93">93</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#XV">15.</a></td><td>Poverty as a Means of Enjoyment</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_103">103</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#XVI">16.</a></td><td>The Arrangement of Books</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_105">105</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#XVII">17.</a></td><td>Enemies of Books</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_108">108</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#XVIII">18.</a></td><td>Library Companions</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_121">121</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right"><a href="#XIX">19.</a></td><td>The Friendship of Books</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_132"><ins class="correction" title="original: 133">132</ins></a></td></tr></table>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg004b.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<h2><span style="color: maroon;">BALLADS.</span></h2>
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/red_clover.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
+<tr><td align="right">1.</td><td>How a Bibliomaniac Binds his Books</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_26">26</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">2.</td><td>The Bibliomaniac&#8217;s Assignment of Binders</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_28">28</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">3.</td><td>The Failing Books</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_33">33</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">4.</td><td>Suiting Paper to Subject</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_34">34</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">5.</td><td>The Sentimental Chambermaid</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_37">37</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">6.</td><td>A Woman&#8217;s Idea of a Library</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_42">42</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">7.</td><td>The Shy Portraits</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_54">54</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">8.</td><td>The Snatchers</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_71">71</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">9.</td><td>The Stolid Auctioneer</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_75">75</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">10.</td><td>The Prophetic Book</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_80">80</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">11.</td><td>The Book-Seller</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_82">82</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">12.</td><td>The Public Librarian</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_85">85</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">13.</td><td>The Book-Worm does not care for Nature</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_97">97</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">14.</td><td>How I go A-Fishing</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_99">99</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">15.</td><td>The Book-Thief</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_111">111</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">16.</td><td>The Smoke Traveler</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_112">112</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">17.</td><td>The Fire in the Library</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_116">116</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">18.</td><td>Cleaning the Library</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_117">117</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">19.</td><td>Ode to Omar</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_119">119</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">20.</td><td>My Dog</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_121">121</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">21.</td><td>My Clocks</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_123">123</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">22.</td><td>A Portrait</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_125">125</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">23.</td><td>My Schoolmate</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_126">126</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">24.</td><td>My Shingle</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_129">129</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">25.</td><td>Solitaire</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_130">130</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align="right">26.</td><td>My Friends the Books</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_133">133</a></td></tr></table>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg005b.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
+<tr><td><span class="dropfig" style="margin-top: -0.5em; margin-bottom: -1em;"><img src="images/img_pg006.jpg" alt="T" /></span><span style="color: maroon;">o book-worms all, of high or low degree,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><span style="color: maroon;">Whate&#8217;er of madness be their stages,</span></span><br />
+<span style="color: maroon;">And just as well unknown as known to me,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><span style="color: maroon;">I dedicate these trifling pages,</span></span><br />
+<span style="color: maroon;">In hope that when they turn them o&#8217;er</span><br />
+<span style="color: maroon;">They will not find the Track a bore.</span></td></tr></table>
+
+
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[Pg 9]</a></span></p>
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg009.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+<p class="center"><span class="giant">The Track of the Book-Worm.</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2><a name="I" id="I"></a>I.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">OBJECTS OF COLLECTION.</span></p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_p.jpg" alt="P" /></span>hilosophers have made various and ingenious but incomplete attempts to
+form a succinct definition of the animal, Man. At first thought it might
+seem that a perfect definition would be, an animal who makes collections.
+But one must remember that the magpie does this. Yet this definition is as
+good as any, and comes nearer exactness than most <img src="images/acorn_var2.jpg" alt="" /> What has not the
+animal Man collected? <span class="figright"><img src="images/img_pg009c.jpg" alt="" /></span> Clocks, watches, snuff-boxes, canes, fans, laces,
+precious stones, china, coins, paper money, spoons, prints, paintings,
+tulips, orchids, hens, horses, match-boxes, postal stamps, miniatures,
+violins, show-bills, play-bills, swords, buttons, shoes, china slippers,
+spools, birds, butterflies, beetles, saddles, skulls, wigs, lanterns,
+book-plates, knockers, crystal balls, shells, penny toys, death-masks,
+tea-pots, <span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[Pg 10]</a></span>autographs, rugs, armour, pipes, arrow heads, locks of hair and
+key locks, and hats (Jules Verne&#8217;s &#8220;Tale of a Hat&#8221;), these are some of the
+most prominent subjects in search of which the animal Man runs up and down
+the earth, and spends time and money without scruple or stint <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> But all
+these curious objects of search fall into insignificance when compared
+with the ancient, noble and useful passion for collecting books. One of
+the wisest of the human race said, the only earthly immortality is in
+writing a book; and the desire to accumulate these evidences of earthly
+immortality needs no defense among cultivated men.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/leaves_jag.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[Pg 11]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="II" id="II"></a>II.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">WHO HAVE COLLECTED BOOKS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t.jpg" alt="T" /></span>he mania for book-collecting is by no means a modern disease, but has
+existed ever since there were books to gather, and has infected many of
+the wisest and most potent names in history. Euripides is ridiculed by
+Aristophanes in &#8220;The Frogs&#8221; for collecting books. Of the Roman emperor,
+Gordian, who flourished (or rather did not flourish, because he was slain
+after a reign of thirty-six days) in the third century, Gibbon says,
+&#8220;twenty-two acknowledged concubines and a library of sixty thousand
+volumes attested the variety of his inclinations.&#8221; This combination of
+uxorious and literary tastes seems to have existed in another monarch of a
+later period&mdash;Henry VIII.&mdash;the seeming disproportion of whose expenditure
+of 10,800 pounds for jewels in three years, during which he spent but 100
+pounds for books and binding, is explained by the fact that he was
+indebted for the contents of his libraries to the plunder of monasteries.
+Henry printed a few copies of his book against Luther on vellum <img src="images/acorn_var2.jpg" alt="" /> Cicero,
+who possessed a superb library, especially rich in Greek, at his villa in
+Tusculum, thus describes his favorite acquisitions: &#8220;Books to quicken the
+intelligence of youth, delight age, <span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[Pg 12]</a></span>decorate prosperity, shelter and
+solace us in adversity, bring enjoyment at home, befriend us out-of-doors,
+pass the night with us, travel with us, go into the country with us.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_p.jpg" alt="P" /></span>etrarch, who collected books not simply for his own gratification, but
+aspired to become the founder of a permanent library at Venice, gave his
+books to the Church of St. Mark; but the greater part of them perished
+through neglect, and only a small part remains. Boccaccio, anticipating an
+early death, offered his library to Petrarch, his dear friend, on his own
+terms, to insure its preservation, and the poet promised to care for the
+collection in case he survived Boccaccio; but the latter, outliving
+Petrarch, bequeathed his books to the Augustinians of Florence, and some
+of them are still shown to visitors in the Laurentinian Library. From
+Boccaccio&#8217;s own account of his collection, one must believe his books
+quite inappropriate for a monastic library, and the good monks probably
+instituted an auto da fe for most of them, like that which befell the
+knightly romances in &#8220;Don Quixote.&#8221; Perhaps the naughty story-teller
+intended the donation as a covert satire. The walls of the room which
+formerly contained Montaigne&#8217;s books, and is at this day exhibited to
+pilgrims, are covered with inscriptions burnt in with branding-irons on
+the beams and rafters by the eccentric and delightful essayist <img src="images/acorns.jpg" alt="" /> The
+author of &#8220;Ivanhoe&#8221; adorned his magnificent library with<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[Pg 13]</a></span> suits of superb
+armor, and luxuriated in demonology and witchcraft. The caustic Swift was
+in the habit of annotating his books, and writing on the fly-leaves a
+summary opinion of the author&#8217;s merits; whatever else he had, he owned no
+Shakespeare, nor can any reference to him be found in the nineteen volumes
+of Swift&#8217;s works. Military men seem always to have had a passion for
+books. To say nothing of the literary and rhetorical tastes of C&aelig;sar, &#8220;the
+foremost man of all time,&#8221; Frederick the Great had libraries at Sans
+Souci, Potsdam, and Berlin, in which he arranged the volumes by classes
+without regard to size. Thick volumes he rebound in sections for more
+convenient use, and his favorite French authors he sometimes caused to be
+reprinted in compact editions to his taste. The great Conde inherited a
+valuable library from his father, and enlarged and loved it. Marlborough
+had twenty-five books on vellum, all earlier than 1496. The hard-fighting
+Junot had a vellum library which sold in London for 1,400 pounds, while
+his great master was not too busy in conquering Europe not only to solace
+himself in his permanent libraries, and in books which he carried with him
+in his expeditions, but to project and actually commence the printing of a
+camp library of duodecimo volumes, without margins, and in thin covers, to
+embrace some three thousand volumes, and which he had designed to complete
+in six years by employing one hundred and twenty compositors and
+twenty-five editors, at an outlay of about 163,000 pounds <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> St.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[Pg 14]</a></span> Helena
+destroyed this scheme. It is curious to note that Napoleon despised
+Voltaire as heartily as Frederick admired him, but gave Fielding and Le
+Sage places among his traveling companions; while the Bibliomaniac appears
+in his direction to his librarian: &#8220;I will have fine editions and handsome
+bindings. I am rich enough for that.&#8221; <img src="images/fan.jpg" alt="" /> The main thing that shakes one&#8217;s
+confidence in the correctness of his literary taste is that he was fond of
+&#8220;Ossian.&#8221; Julius C&aelig;sar also formed a traveling library of forty-four
+little volumes, contained in an oak case measuring 16 by 11 by 3 inches,
+covered with leather. The books are bound in white vellum, and consist of
+history, philosophy, theology, and poetry, in Greek and Latin. The
+collector was Sir Julius C&aelig;sar, of England, and this exquisite and unique
+collection is in the British Museum. The books were all printed between
+1591 and 1616 <img src="images/acorn_var3.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_s.jpg" alt="S" /></span>outhey brought together fourteen thousand volumes, the most valuable
+collection which had up to that time been acquired by any man whose means
+and estate lay, as he once said of himself, in his inkstand. Time fails me
+to speak of Erasmus, De Thou, Grotius, Goethe, Bodley; Hans Sloane, whose
+private library of fifty thousand volumes was the beginning of that of the
+British Museum; the Cardinal Borromeo, who founded the Ambrosian Library
+at Milan with his own forty thousand volumes, and the other great names
+entitled to the description of Bibliomaniac.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[Pg 15]</a></span> We must not forget Sir
+Richard Whittington, of feline fame, who gave 400 pounds to found the
+library of Christ&#8217;s Hospital, London <img src="images/img_pg015.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>The fair sex, good and bad, have been lovers of books or founders of
+libraries; witness the distinguished names of Lady Jane Gray, Catherine De
+Medicis, and Diane de Poictiers.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/long_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>t only remains to speak of the great opium-eater, who was a sort of
+literary ghoul, famed for borrowing books and never returning them, and
+whose library was thus made up of the enforced contributions of
+friends&mdash;for who would have dared refuse the loan of a book to Thomas de
+Quincey? The name of the unhappy man would have descended to us with that
+of the incendiary of the Temple of Diana at Ephesus. But the great Thomas
+was recklessly careless and slovenly in his use of books; and Burton, in
+the &#8220;Book-hunter,&#8221; tells us that &#8220;he once gave in copy written on the
+edges of a tall octavo &#8216;Somnium Scipionis,&#8217; and as he did not obliterate
+the original matter, the printer was rather puzzled, and made a funny
+jumble between the letter-press Latin and the manuscript English.&#8221; <img src="images/fan.jpg" alt="" /> I
+seriously fear that with him must be ranked the gentle Elia, who said: &#8220;A
+book reads the better which is our own, and has been so long known to us
+that we know the topography of its blots and dog&#8217;s ears, and can trace the
+dirt in it to having read it at tea with buttered muffins, or over a pipe,
+which I think is the maximum.&#8221; And yet a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_16" id="Page_16">[Pg 16]</a></span> great degree of slovenliness may
+be excused in Charles because, according to Leigh Hunt, he once gave a
+kiss to an old folio Chapman&#8217;s &#8220;Homer,&#8221; and when asked how he knew his
+books one from the other, for hardly any were lettered, he answered: &#8220;How
+does a shepherd know his sheep?&#8221; <img src="images/img_pg016.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>The love of books displayed by the sensual Henry and the pugnacious Junot
+is not more remarkable than that of the epicurean and sumptuous Lucullus,
+to whom Pompey, when sick, having been directed by his physician to eat a
+thrush for dinner, and learning from his servants that in summer-time
+thrushes were not to be found anywhere but in Lucullus&#8217; fattening coops,
+refused to be indebted for his meal, observing: &#8220;So if Lucullus had not
+been an epicure, Pompey had not lived.&#8221; Of him the veracious Plutarch
+says: &#8220;His furnishing a library, however, deserved praise and record, for
+he collected very many and choice manuscripts; and the use they were put
+to was even more magnificent than the purchase, the library being always
+open, and the walks and reading rooms about it free to all Greeks, whose
+delight it was to leave their other occupations and hasten thither as to
+the habitation of the Muses.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>It is not recorded that Socrates collected books&mdash;his wife probably
+objected&mdash;but we have his word for it that he loved them. He did not love
+the country, and the only thing that could tempt him thither was a book.
+Acknowledging this to Ph&aelig;drus he says: <img src="images/arrow_leaf.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[Pg 17]</a></span>&#8220;Very true, my good friend; and I hope that you will excuse me when you
+hear the reason, which is, that I am a lover of knowledge, and the men who
+dwell in the city are my teachers, and not the trees or the country.
+Though I do indeed believe that you have found a spell with which to draw
+me out of the city into the country, like a hungry cow before whom a bough
+or a bunch of fruit is waved. For only hold up before me in like manner a
+book, and you may lead me all round Attica, and over the wide world. And
+now having arrived, I intend to lie down, and do you choose any posture in
+which you can read best.&#8221;</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg017.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[Pg 18]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="III" id="III"></a>III.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">DIVERSE TASTES.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/long_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>t is fortunate for the harmony of book-collectors that they do not all
+desire the same thing, just as it was fortunate for their young State that
+all the Romans did not want the same Sabine woman. Otherwise the Helenic
+battle of the books would be fiercer than it is. Thus there are
+bibliomaniacs who reprint rare books from their own libraries in limited
+numbers; authors, like Walpole, who print their own works, and whose fame
+as printers is better deserved than their reputation as writers; like
+Thackeray, who design the illustrations for their own romances, or, like
+Astor, who procure a single copy of their novel to be illustrated at
+lavish expense by artists; amateurs who bind their own books; lunatics who
+yearn for books wholly engraved, or printed only on one side of the leaf,
+or Greek books wholly in capitals, or others in the italic letter; or
+black-letter fanciers; or tall copy men; or rubricists, missal men, or
+first edition men, or incunabulists <img src="images/acorns2.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>One seeks only ancient books; another limited editions; another those
+privately printed; a fourth wants nothing but presentation copies; yet
+another only those that have belonged to famous men, and still another
+illustrated or illuminated books. There is a perfectly rabid and incurable
+class, of whom the most harmless are devoted to pamphlets; another,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[Pg 19]</a></span>
+rather more dangerous, to incorrect or suppressed editions; and a third,
+stark mad, to play-bills and portraits. One patronizes the drama, one
+poetry, one the fine arts, another books about books and their collectors;
+and a very recherche class devote themselves to works on playing-cards,
+angling, magic, or chess, emblems, dances of death, or the jest books and
+faceti&aelig; <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> Finally, there are those unhappy beings who run up and down for
+duplicates, searching for every edition of their favorite authors. In very
+recent days there has arisen a large class who demand the first editions
+of popular novelists like Dickens, Thackeray and Hawthorne, and will pay
+large prices for these issues which have no value except that of rarity. I
+can quite understand the enthusiasm of the collector over the beautiful
+first editions of the Greek and Latin classics, or for the first &#8220;Paradise
+Lost,&#8221; or even for the ugly first folio &#8220;Shakespeare,&#8221; <span class="figright"><img src="images/img_pg019.jpg" alt="" /></span> and why he should
+prefer the comparatively rude first Walton&#8217;s Angler to Pickering&#8217;s
+edition, the handsomest of this century, with its monumental title page.
+But why a first edition of a popular novel should be more desirable than a
+late one, which is usually the more elegant, I confess I cannot
+understand. It is one of those things which, like the mystery of religion,
+we must take on trust. So when a bookseller tells me that a copy of the
+first issue<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[Pg 20]</a></span> of &#8220;The Scarlet Letter&#8221; has sold for seventy-five dollars,
+and that a copy of the second, with the same date, but put out six months
+later, is worth only seventy-five cents, I open my eyes but not my purse,
+especially when I consider that the second is greatly superior to the
+first on account of its famous preface of apology, and when I read of some
+one&#8217;s bidding $1875 for a copy of Poe&#8217;s worthless &#8220;Tamerlane,&#8221; I am
+flattered by the reflection that there is one man in the world whom I
+believe to be eighteen hundred and seventy-five times as great a fool as I am!</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/flower.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[Pg 21]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="IV" id="IV"></a>IV.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">THE SIZE OF BOOKS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_w.jpg" alt="W" /></span>ere I a despotic ruler of the universe I would make it a serious offense
+to publish a book larger than royal octavo. Books should be made to read,
+or at all events to look at, and in this view comfort and ease should be
+consulted. Any one who has ever undertaken to read a huge quarto or folio
+will sympathize with this view. The older and lazier the Book-Worm grows
+the more he longs for little books, which he can hold in one hand without
+getting a cramp, or at least support with arms in an elbow chair without
+fatigue. Darwin remorselessly split big books in two. Mr. Slater says in
+&#8220;Book Collecting:&#8221; &#8220;When the library at Sion College took fire the
+attendants, at the risk of their lives, rescued a pile of books from the
+flames, and it is said that the librarian wept when he found that the
+porters had taken it for granted that the value of a book was in exact
+proportion to its size.&#8221; Few of us, I suspect, ever read our family Bible,
+and all of us probably groan when we lift out the unabridged dictionary.
+The &#8220;Century Dictionary&#8221; is a luxury because it is published in small and
+convenient parts. I cannot conceive any good in a big book except that the
+ladies may use it to press flowers or mosses in, or the nurses may put<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_22" id="Page_22">[Pg 22]</a></span> it
+in a chair to sit the baby on at table. I have heard of a gentleman who
+inherited a mass of folio volumes and arranged them as shelves for his
+smaller treasures, and of another who arranged his 12-mos on a stand made
+up of the seventeen volumes of Pinkerton&#8217;s &#8220;Voyages&#8221; and Denon&#8217;s &#8220;Egypt&#8221;
+for shelves. What reader would not prefer a dainty little Elzevir to the
+huge folio, C&aelig;sar&#8217;s &#8220;Commentaries,&#8221; even with the big bull in it, and the
+wicker idol full of burning human victims? What can be more pleasing than
+the modern Quantin edition of the classics? Or, to speak of a popular
+book, take the &#8220;Pastels in Prose,&#8221; the most exquisite book for the price
+ever known in the history of printing <img src="images/leaf_l.jpg" alt="" /> The small book ought however to
+be easily legible. The health and comfort of the human eye should be
+consulted in the size of the type. Nothing can be worse in this regard
+than the Pickering diamond classics, if meant to be read; and it seems
+that there are too many of them to be intended as mere curiosities of
+printing. Let us approve the exit of the folio and the quarto, and applaud
+the modern tendency toward little and handy volumes. Large paper however
+is a worthy distinction when the subject is worth the distinction and the
+edition is not too large. Nothing raises the gorge of the true Book-Worm
+more than to see an issue on large paper of a row of histories, for
+example; and the very worst instance conceivable was a large paper
+Webster&#8217;s &#8220;Unabridged Dictionary&#8221; issued some years ago. The book thus
+distinguished ought to be a classic, or <span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[Pg 23]</a></span>peculiar for elegance, never a
+series, or stereotyped, the first struck off, and the issue ought not to
+be more than from fifty to one hundred copies; any larger issue is not
+worth the extra margin bestowed, and no experienced buyer will tolerate
+it <img src="images/arrow_leaf.jpg" alt="" /> But if all these conditions are observed, the large paper copies
+bear the same relation to the small that a proof before letters of a print
+holds to the other impressions. Large margins are very pleasant in a
+library as well as in Wall Street, and much more apt to be permanent.
+There are some favorite books of which the possessor longs in vain for a
+large copy, as for instance, the Pickering &#8220;Walton and Cotton.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_a.jpg" alt="A" /></span> great deal of fun is made of the Book-Worm because of his desire for
+large paper and of his insistence on uncut edges, but his reasons are
+sound and his taste is unimpeachable. The tricks of the book-trade to
+catch the inexperienced with the bait of large paper are very amusing.
+&#8220;Strictly limited&#8221; to so many copies for England and so many for America,
+say a thousand in all, or else the number is not stated, and always
+described as an edition de luxe, and its looks are always very repulsive.
+But the bait is eagerly bitten at by a shoal of beings anxious to get one
+of these rarities&mdash;a class to one of whom I once found it necessary to
+explain that &#8220;uncut edges&#8221; does not mean leaves not cut open, and that he
+would not injure the value of his book by being able to read it, and was
+not bound to peep in surreptitiously like a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_24" id="Page_24">[Pg 24]</a></span> maid-servant at a door &#8220;on
+the jar.&#8221; I once knew a satirical Book-Worm who issued a pamphlet, &#8220;one
+hundred copies on large paper, none on small.&#8221; There is no just
+distinction in an ugly large-paper issue, and sometimes it is not nearly
+so beautiful as the small, especially when the latter has uncut edges. The
+independence of the collector who prefers the small in such circumstances
+is to be commended and imitated.</p>
+
+<p>Too great inequality in uncut edges is also to be shunned as an ugliness.
+It seems that some French books are printed on paper of two different
+sizes, the effect of which is very grotesque, and the device is a catering
+to a very crude and extravagant taste.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg024.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[Pg 25]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="V" id="V"></a>V.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">BINDING.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t.jpg" alt="T" /></span>he binding of books for several centuries has held the dignity of a fine
+art, quite independent of printing. This has been demonstrated by
+exhibitions in this country and abroad. But every collector ought to
+observe fitness in the binding which he procures to be executed. True
+fitness prevails in most old and fine bindings; seldom was a costly garb
+bestowed on a book unworthy of it. But in many a luxurious library we see
+a modern binding fit for a unique or rare book given to one that is
+comparatively worthless or common. Not to speak of bindings that are real
+works of art, many collectors go astray in dressing lumber in purple and
+fine linen&mdash;putting full levant morocco on blockhead histories and such
+stuff that perishes in the not using. It is a sad spectacle to behold a
+unique binding wasted on a book of no more value than a backgammon board.
+There are of course not a great many of us who can afford unique bindings,
+but those who cannot should at least observe propriety and fitness in this
+regard, and draw the line severely between full dress and demi-toilette,
+and keep a sharp eye to appropriateness of color. I have known several men
+who bound their books all alike.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[Pg 26]</a></span> Nothing could be worse except one who
+should bind particular subjects in special styles, pace Mr. Ellwanger,
+who, in &#8220;The Story of My House,&#8221; advises the Book-Worm to &#8220;bind the poets
+in yellow or orange, books on nature in olive, the philosophers in blue,
+the French classics in red,&#8221; etc. I am curious to know what color this
+pleasant writer would adopt for the binding of his books by military men,
+such for example as &#8220;Major Walpole&#8217;s Anecdotes.&#8221; (p. 262) <img src="images/acorn_var2.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_a.jpg" alt="A" /></span>mbrose Fermin
+Didot <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> recommended binding the &#8220;Iliad&#8221; in red and the
+&#8220;Odyssey&#8221; in blue, for the Greek rhapsodists wore a scarlet cloak when
+they recited the former and a blue one when they recited the latter. The
+churchmen he would clothe in violet, cardinals in scarlet, philosophers in
+black <img src="images/leaves.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>I have imagined</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: -2.5em;">HOW A BIBLIOMANIAC BINDS HIS BOOKS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>&#8217;d like my favorite books to bind<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">So that their outward dress</span><br />
+To every bibliomaniac&#8217;s mind<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Their contents should express.</span><br />
+<br />
+Napoleon&#8217;s life should glare in red,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">John Calvin&#8217;s gloom in blue;</span><br />
+Thus they would typify bloodshed<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And sour religion&#8217;s hue.</span><br />
+<br />
+The prize-ring record of the past<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[Pg 27]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Must be in blue and black;</span><br />
+While any color that is fast<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Would do for Derby track.</span><br />
+<br />
+The Popes in scarlet well may go;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In jealous green, Othello;</span><br />
+In gray, Old Age of Cicero,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And London Cries in yellow.</span><br />
+<br />
+My Walton should his gentle art<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In Salmon best express,</span><br />
+And Penn and Fox the friendly heart<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In quiet drab confess.</span><br />
+<br />
+Statistics of the lumber trade<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Should be embraced in boards,</span><br />
+While muslin for the inspired Maid<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A fitting garb affords.</span><br />
+<br />
+Intestine wars I&#8217;d clothe in vellum,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">While pig-skin Bacon grasps,</span><br />
+And flat romances, such as &#8220;Pelham,&#8221;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Should stand in calf with clasps.</span><br />
+<br />
+Blind-tooled should be blank verse and rhyme<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of Homer and of Milton;</span><br />
+But Newgate Calendar of Crime<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I&#8217;d lavishly dab gilt on.</span><br />
+<br />
+The edges of a sculptor&#8217;s life<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">May fitly marbled be,</span><br />
+But sprinkle not, for fear of strife,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A Baptist history.</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_28" id="Page_28">[Pg 28]</a></span><br />
+Crimea&#8217;s warlike facts and dates<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of fragrant Russia smell;</span><br />
+The subjugated Barbary States<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In crushed Morocco dwell.</span><br />
+<br />
+But oh! that one I hold so dear<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Should be arrayed so cheap</span><br />
+Gives me a qualm; I sadly fear<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">My Lamb must be half-sheep.</span></p></div>
+
+<p>No doubt a Book-Worm so far gone as this could invent stricter analogies
+and make even the binder fit the book <img src="images/leaves.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>So we should have</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: -3em;">THE BIBLIOMANIAC&#8217;S ASSIGNMENT OF BINDERS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>f I could bring the dead to day,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I would your soul with wonder fill</span><br />
+By pointing out a novel way<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For bibliopegistic skill.</span><br />
+<br />
+My Walton, Trautz should take in hand,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Or else I&#8217;d give him o&#8217;er to Hering;</span><br />
+Matthews should make the Gospels stand<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A solemn warning to the erring.</span><br />
+<br />
+The history of the Inquisition,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With all its diabolic train</span><br />
+Of cruelty and superstition,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Should fitly be arrayed by Payne.</span><br />
+<br />
+A book of dreams by Bedford clad,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A Papal history by De Rome,</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[Pg 29]</a></span>Should make the sense of fitness glad<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In every bibliomaniac&#8217;s home.</span><br />
+<br />
+As our first mother&#8217;s folly cost<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Her sex so dear, and makes men grieve,</span><br />
+So Milton&#8217;s plaint of Eden lost<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Would be appropriate to Eve.</span><br />
+<br />
+Hayday would make &#8220;One Summer&#8221; be<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Doubly attractive to the view;</span><br />
+While General Wolfe&#8217;s biography<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Should be the work of Pasdeloup.</span><br />
+<br />
+For lives of dwarfs, like Thomas Thumb,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Petit&#8217;s the man by nature made,</span><br />
+And when Munchasen strikes us dumb<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It is by means of Gascon aid.</span><br />
+<br />
+Thus would I the great binders blend<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In harmony with work before &#8217;em,</span><br />
+And so Riviere I would commend<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To Turner&#8217;s &#8220;Liber Fluviorum.&#8221;</span></p></div>
+
+<p>After all, whether one can afford a three-hundred or a three-dollar
+binding, the gentle Elia has said the last word about fitness of bindings
+when he observed: &#8220;To be strong-backed and neat-bound is the desideratum
+of a volume; magnificence comes after. This, when it can be afforded, is
+not to be lavished on all kinds of books indiscriminately <img src="images/leaf_l.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Where we know that a book is at once both good and rare&mdash;where the
+individual is almost the species,</p>
+
+<p class="poem"><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_30" id="Page_30">[Pg 30]</a></span>
+&#8216;We know not where is that Prometian torch<br />
+That can its light relumine;&#8217;</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Such a book for instance as the &#8216;Life of the Duke of Newcastle&#8217; by his
+Duchess&mdash;no casket is rich enough, no casing sufficiently durable, to
+honor and keep safe such a jewel <img src="images/img_pg030.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>&#8220;To view a well arranged assortment of block-headed encyclop&oelig;dias
+(Anglicana or Metropolitanas), set out in an array of Russia and Morocco,
+when a tithe of that good leather would comfortably reclothe my shivering
+folios, would renovate Parcelsus himself, and enable old Raymond Lully to
+look like himself again in the world. I never see these impostors but I
+long to strip them and warm my ragged veterans in their spoils.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t2.jpg" alt="T" /></span>here spoke the true Book-Worm. What a pity he could not have sold a part
+of his good sense and fine taste to some of the affluent collectors of
+this period!</p>
+
+<p>Doubtless an experienced binder could give some amusing examples of
+mistakes in indorsing books with their names. One remains in my memory. A
+French binder, entrusted with a French translation of &#8220;Uncle Tom&#8217;s Cabin,&#8221;
+in two volumes, put &#8220;L&#8217;Oncle&#8221; on both, and numbered them &#8220;Tome 1,&#8221; &#8220;Tome
+2.&#8221; Charles Cowden-Clarke tells of his having ordered Leigh Hunt&#8217;s poems
+entitled &#8220;Foliage&#8221; to be bound in green, and how the book came home in
+blue. That would answer for the &#8220;blue<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_31" id="Page_31">[Pg 31]</a></span> grass&#8221; region of Kentucky. I have
+no patience with those disgusting realists who bind books in human or
+snake skin. In his charming book on the Law Reporters, Mr. Wallace says of
+Desaussures&#8217; South Carolina Reports: &#8220;When these volumes are found in
+their original binding most persons, I think, are struck with its
+peculiarity. The cause of it is, I believe, that it was done by negroes.&#8221;
+What the &#8220;peculiarity&#8221; is he does not disclose. But book-binding seems to
+be an unwonted occupation for negro slaves. It was not often that they
+beat skins, although their own skins were frequently beaten.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg031.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_32" id="Page_32">[Pg 32]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="VI" id="VI"></a>VI.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">PAPER.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/long_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>t is a serious question whether the art of printing has been improved
+except in facility. Is not the first printed book still the finest ever
+printed? But in one point I am certain that the moderns have fallen away,
+at least in the production of cheap books, and that is in the quality and
+finish of the paper. Not to speak of injurious devices to make the book
+heavy, the custom of calendering the paper, or making it smooth and shiny,
+practised by some important publishers, is bad for the eyes, and the
+result is not pleasant to look at. It is like the glare of the glass over
+the framed print. It is said to be necessary to the production of the
+modern &#8220;process&#8221; pictures. Even here however there is a just mean, for
+some of the modern paper is absurdly rough, and very difficult for a good
+impression of the types. Modern paper however has one advantage: Mr.
+Blades, in his pleasant &#8220;Enemies of Books,&#8221; tells us &#8220;that the worm will
+not touch it,&#8221; it is so adulterated. One hint I would give the
+publishers&mdash;allow us a few more fly leaves, so that we may paste in
+newspaper cuttings, and make memoranda and suggestions <img src="images/img_pg032b.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>It is predicted by some that our nineteenth century books&mdash;at least those
+of the last third&mdash;will not last; that the paper and ink are far inferior
+to those of preceding centuries, and that the destroying tooth of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_33" id="Page_33">[Pg 33]</a></span> time
+will work havoc with them. No doubt the modern paper and the modern ink
+are inferior to those of the earlier ages of printing, when making a book
+was a fine art and a work of conscience, but whether the modern
+productions of the press will ultimately fade and crumble is a question to
+be determined only by a considerable lapse of time, which probably no one
+living will be qualified to pronounce upon. Take for what they are worth
+my sentiments respecting</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">THE FAILING BOOKS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_t.jpg" alt="T" /></span>hey say our books will disappear,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That ink will fade and paper rot&mdash;</span><br />
+I sha&#8217;n&#8217;t be here,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">So I don&#8217;t care a jot.</span><br />
+<br />
+The best of them I know by heart,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As for the rest they make me tired;</span><br />
+The viler part<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">May well be fired.</span><br />
+<br />
+Oh, what a hypocritic show<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Will be the bibliomaniac&#8217;s hoard!</span><br />
+Cheat as hollow<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As a backgammon board.</span><br />
+<br />
+Just think of Lamb without his stuffing,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the iconoclastic Howells,</span><br />
+Who spite of puffing<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is destitute of bowels.</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[Pg 34]</a></span><br />
+&#8217;Twould make me laugh to see the stare<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of mousing bibliomaniac fond</span><br />
+At pages bare<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As Overreach&#8217;s bond.</span><br />
+<br />
+Those empty titles will displease<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The earnest student seeking knowledge,&mdash;</span><br />
+Barren degrees,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Like these of Western College.</span><br />
+<br />
+That common stuff, &#8220;Excelsior,&#8221;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In poetry so lacking,</span><br />
+I care not for&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8217;Tis only fit for packing.</span></p></div>
+
+<p>It has occurred to me that publishers might appeal to bibliomaniacal
+tastes by paying a little more attention to their paper, and I have thrown
+a few suggestions on this point into rhyme, so that they may be readily
+committed to memory:</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p>SUITING PAPER TO SUBJECT.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_p.jpg" alt="P" /></span>rinters the paper should adapt<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Unto the subject of the book,</span><br />
+Thus making buyers wonder-rapt<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Before they at the contents look.</span><br />
+<br />
+Thus Beerbohm&#8217;s learned book on Eggs<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">On a laid paper he should print,</span><br />
+But Motley&#8217;s &#8220;Dutch Republic&#8221; begs<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Rice paper should its matter hint.</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[Pg 35]</a></span><br />
+That curious problem of what Man<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Inhabited the Iron Mask</span><br />
+Than Whatman paper never can<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A more suggestive medium ask.</span><br />
+<br />
+The &#8220;Book of Dates,&#8221; by Mr. Haydon,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Should be on paper calendered;</span><br />
+That Swift on Servants be arrayed on<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A hand-made paper is inferred.</span><br />
+<br />
+Though angling-books have never been<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Accustomed widely to appear</span><br />
+On fly-paper, &#8217;twould be no sin<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To have them wormed from front to rear.</span><br />
+<br />
+The good that authors thus may reap<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I&#8217;ll not pursue to tedium,</span><br />
+But hint, for books on raising sheep<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Buckram is just the medium.</span></p></div>
+
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_36" id="Page_36">[Pg 36]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="VII" id="VII"></a>VII.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">WOMEN AS COLLECTORS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_w.jpg" alt="W" /></span>omen collect all sorts
+of <img src="images/acorn.jpg" alt="" /> things except books. To them the book-sense
+seems to be denied, and it is difficult for them to appreciate its
+existence in men. To be sure, there have been a few celebrated
+book-collectors among the fair sex, but they have usually been rather
+reprehensible ladies, like Diane de Poictiers and Madame Pompadour.
+Probably Aspasia was a collector of MSS. Lady Jane Grey seems to have been
+a virtuous exception, and she was cruelly &#8220;cropped.&#8221; I am told that there
+are a few women now-a-days who collect books, and only a few weeks ago a
+lady read, before a woman&#8217;s club in Chicago, a paper on the Collection and
+Adornment of Books, for which occasion a fair member of the club solicited
+me to write her something appropriate to read, which of course I was glad
+to do. But this was in Chicago, where the women go in for culture. In
+thirty years&#8217; haunting of the book-shops and print-shops of New York, I
+have never seen a woman catching a cold in her head by turning over the
+large prints, nor soiling her dainty gloves by handling the dirty old
+books. Women have been depicted in literature in many different
+occupations, situations and pleasures, but in all the literature that I
+have<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_37" id="Page_37">[Pg 37]</a></span> read I can recall only one instance in which she is imagined a
+book-buyer. This is in &#8220;The Sentimental Journey,&#8221; and in celebrating the
+unique instance let me rise to a nobler strain and sing a song of</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: -1.5em;">THE SENTIMENTAL CHAMBERMAID.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_w.jpg" alt="W" /></span>hen you&#8217;re in Paris, do not fail<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To seek the Quai de Conti,</span><br />
+Where in the roguish Parson&#8217;s tale,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Upon the river front he</span><br />
+Bespoke the pretty chambermaid<br />
+Too innocent to be afraid.<br />
+<br />
+On this book-seller&#8217;s mouldy stall,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Crammed full of volumes musty,</span><br />
+I made a bibliophilic call<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And saw, in garments rusty,</span><br />
+The ancient vender, queer to view,<br />
+In breeches, buckles, and a queue.<br />
+<br />
+And while to find that famous book,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;Les Egaremens du C&oelig;ur,&#8221;</span><br />
+I dilligently undertook,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I suddenly met her;</span><br />
+She held a small green satin purse,<br />
+And spite of Time looked none the worse.<br />
+<br />
+I told her she was known to Fame<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Through ministerial Mentor,</span><br />
+And though I had not heard her name,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That this should not prevent her</span><br />
+From listening to the homage due<br />
+To one to Sentiment so true.<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_38" id="Page_38">[Pg 38]</a></span><br />
+She blushed; I bowed in courtly fashion;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In pockets of my trousers</span><br />
+Then sought a crown to vouch my passion,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Without intent to rouse hers;</span><br />
+But I had left my purse &#8217;twould seem&mdash;<br />
+And then I woke&mdash;&#8217;twas but a dream!<br />
+<br />
+The heart will wander, never doubt,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Though waking faith it keep;</span><br />
+That is exceptionally stout<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Which strays but in its sleep;</span><br />
+And hearts must always turn to her<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Who loved, &#8220;Les Egaremens du C&oelig;ur.&#8221;</span></p></div>
+
+<p>M. Uzanne, in &#8220;The Book-Hunter in Paris,&#8221; avers that &#8220;the woman of fashion
+never goes book-hunting,&#8221; and he puts the aphorism in italics. He also
+says that the occasional woman at the book-stalls, &#8220;if by chance she wants
+a book, tries to bargain for it as if it were a lobster or a fowl.&#8221; Also
+that the book-stall keepers are always watchful of the woman with an
+ulster, a water-proof, or a muff. These garments are not always impervious
+to books, it seems.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/fan.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_39" id="Page_39">[Pg 39]</a></span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg039.jpg" alt="T" /></span>he imitative efforts
+of women at &#8220;extra-illustrating&#8221; are usually <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> limited
+to buying a set of photographs at Rome and sticking them into the cracks
+of &#8220;The Marble Faun,&#8221; and giving it away to a friend as a marked favor <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" />
+Poor Hawthorne! he would wriggle in his grave if he could see his fair
+admirers doing this. Mr. Blades certainly ought to have included women
+among the enemies of books. They generally regard the husband&#8217;s or
+father&#8217;s expenditure on books as so much spoil of their gowns and jewels.
+We book-men are up to all the tricks of getting the books into the house
+without their knowing it <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> What joy and glee when we successfully smuggle
+in a parcel from the express, right under our wife&#8217;s nose, while she is
+busy talking scandal to another woman in the drawing-room! The good
+creatures make us positively dishonest and endanger our eternal welfare.
+How we &#8220;hustle around&#8221; in their absence, when the embargo is temporarily
+raised; and when the new purchases are<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_40" id="Page_40">[Pg 40]</a></span> detected, how we pretend that they
+are old, and wonder that they have not seen them before, and rattle away
+in a fevered, embarrassed manner about the scarcity and value of the
+surreptitious purchases, and how meanly conscious we are all the time that
+the pretense is unavailing and the fair despots see right through us <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" />
+God has given them an instinct that is more than a match for our
+acknowledged superior intellect. And the good wife smiles quietly but
+satirically, and says, in the form in that case made and provided, &#8220;My
+dear, you&#8217;ll certainly ruin yourself buying books!&#8221; with a sigh that
+agitates a very costly diamond necklace reposing on her shapely bosom; or
+she archly shakes at us a warning finger all aglow with ruby and sapphire,
+which she has bought on installments out of the house allowance. Fortunate
+for us if the library is not condemned to be cleaned twice a year. These
+beloved objects ought to deny themselves a ring, or a horse, or a gown, or
+a ball now and then, to atone for their mankind&#8217;s debauchery in books; but
+do they? They ought to encourage the Bibliomania, for it keeps their
+husbands out of mischief, away from &#8220;that horrid club,&#8221; and safe at home
+of evenings. The Book-Worm is always a blameless being. He never has to
+hie to Canada as a refuge. He is &#8220;absolutely pure,&#8221; like all the baking
+powders <img src="images/leaves.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>The gentle Addison, in &#8220;The Spectator,&#8221; thus described a woman&#8217;s library:
+&#8220;The very sound of a lady&#8217;s library gave me a great curiosity to see it;
+and<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_41" id="Page_41">[Pg 41]</a></span> as it was some time before the lady came to me, I had an opportunity
+of turning over a great many of her books, which were ranged together in a
+very beautiful order. At the end of the folios (which were finely bound
+and gilt) were great jars of china placed one above another in a very
+noble piece of architecture. The quartos were separated from the octavos
+by a pile of smaller vessels, which rose in a delightful pyramid <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> The
+octavos were bounded by tea-dishes of all shapes, colors, and sizes, which
+were so disposed on a wooden frame that they looked like one continued
+pillar indented with the finest strokes of sculpture, and stained with the
+greatest variety of dyes. That part of the library which was designed for
+the reception of plays and pamphlets, and other loose papers, was inclosed
+in a kind of square, consisting of one of the prettiest grotesque works
+that I ever saw, and made up of scaramouches, lions, mandarins, monkeys,
+trees, shells, and a thousand other odd figures in china ware. In the
+midst of the room was a little Japan table with a quire of gilt paper upon
+it, and on the paper a silver snuff-box made in shape of a little book. I
+found there were several other counterfeit books upon the upper shelves,
+which were carved in wood, and served only to fill up the number, like
+fagots in the muster of a regiment. I was wonderfully pleased with such a
+mixed kind of furniture as seemed very suitable both to the lady and the
+scholar, and did not know at first whether I should fancy myself in a
+grotto or in a library&#8221; <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_42" id="Page_42">[Pg 42]</a></span>If so great a favorite with the fair sex could say such satirical things
+of them, I may be permitted to have my own idea of</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: -1em;">A WOMAN&#8217;S IDEA OF A LIBRARY.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span> do not care so much for books,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But Libraries are all the style,</span><br />
+With fine &#8220;editions de luxe&#8221;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">One&#8217;s formal callers to beguile;</span><br />
+<br />
+With neat dwarf cases round the walls,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And china teapots on the top,</span><br />
+The empty shelves concealed by falls<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of India silk that graceful drop.</span><br />
+<br />
+A few rare etchings greet the view,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Like &#8220;Harmony&#8221; and &#8220;Harvest Moon;&#8221;</span><br />
+An artist&#8217;s proof on satin too<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By what&#8217;s-his-name is quite a boon.</span><br />
+<br />
+My print called &#8220;Jupiter and Jo&#8221;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is very rarely seen, but then</span><br />
+Another copy I can show<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Inscribed with &#8220;Jupiter and 10.&#8221;</span><br />
+<br />
+A fisher boy in marble stoops<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">On pedestal in window placed,</span><br />
+And one of Rogers&#8217; lovely groups<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is through the long lace curtains traced.</span><br />
+<br />
+And then I make a painting lean<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Upon a white and gilded easel,</span><br />
+Illustrating that famous scene<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_43" id="Page_43">[Pg 43]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of Joseph Andrews and Lady Teazle.</span><br />
+<br />
+Of course my shelves the works reveal<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of Plutarch, Rollin, and of Tupper,</span><br />
+While Bowdler&#8217;s Shakespeare and &#8220;Lucille&#8221;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Quite soothe one&#8217;s spirits after supper.</span><br />
+<br />
+And when I visited dear Rome<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I bought a lot of photographs,</span><br />
+And had them mounted here at home,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And though my dreadful husband laughs,</span><br />
+<br />
+I&#8217;ve put them in &#8220;The Marble Faun,&#8221;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And envious women vainly seek</span><br />
+At Scribner&#8217;s shop, from early dawn,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To find a volume so unique.</span><br />
+<br />
+And monthly here, in deep surmise,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Minerva&#8217;s bust above us frowning,</span><br />
+A club of women analyze<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The works of Ibsen and of Browning.</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>n the charming romance, &#8220;Realmah,&#8221; the noble African prince prescribes
+monogamy to his subjects, but he allows himself three wives; one is a
+State wife, to sit by his side on the throne, help him receive
+embassadors, and preside at court dinners; another a household wife, to
+rule the kitchen and the homely affairs of the palace; the third is a
+love-wife, to be cherished in his heart and bear him children. Why would
+it not be fair to the Book-Worm to concede him a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_44" id="Page_44">[Pg 44]</a></span> Book-wife, who should
+understand and sympathize with him in his eccentricity, and who should
+care more for rare and beautiful books than for diamonds, laces, Easter
+bonnets and ten-button gloves? <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>In regard to women&#8217;s book-clubs, a recent writer, Mr. Edward Sanford
+Martin, in &#8220;Windfalls of Observation,&#8221; observes: &#8220;If a man wants to read a
+book he buys it, and if he likes it he buys six more copies and gives (not
+all the same day, of course) to six women whose intelligence he respects.
+But if a club of fifteen girls determine to read a book, do they buy
+fifteen copies? No. Do they buy five copies? No. Do they buy&mdash;No, they
+don&#8217;t buy at all; they borrow a copy. It doesn&#8217;t lie in womankind to spend
+money for books unless they are meant to be a gift for some man.&#8221; Mr.
+Martin is a little too hard here, for I have been told of such clubs which
+sometimes bought one copy. To be sure they always bully the bookseller
+into letting them have it at cost on account of the probable benefit to
+his trade. But it is true that no normally organized woman will forego a
+dollar&#8217;s worth of ribbon or gloves for a dollar&#8217;s worth of book <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> I have
+sometimes read aloud to a number of women while they were sewing, but I do
+it no more, for just as I got to a point where you ought to be able to
+hear a pin drop, I always have heard some woman whisper, &#8220;Lend me your
+eighty cotton.&#8221; A story was told me of the first meeting of a Browning
+Club in a large city in Ohio. My informant was a young lady from the East,
+who was present, and my readers can<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_45" id="Page_45">[Pg 45]</a></span> safely rely on the correctness of the
+narration. The club was composed of young ladies from sixteen to
+twenty-five years of age, all of the &#8220;first families.&#8221; It was thought best
+to take an easy poem for the first meeting, and so one of them read aloud,
+&#8220;The Last Ride Together&#8221; <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> After the reading there was a moment&#8217;s
+silence, and then one observed that she would like to know whether they
+took that ride on horseback or in a &#8220;buggy.&#8221; Another silence, and then an
+artless young bud ventured the remark that she thought it must have been
+in a buggy, because if it was on horseback he could not have got his arm
+around her. I once thought of sending this anecdote to Mr. Browning, but
+was warned that he was destitute of the sense of humor, especially at his
+own expense, and so desisted <img src="images/acorn_var1.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p class="poem">&#8220;Ah, that our wives could only see<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">How well the money is invested</span><br />
+In these old books, which seem to be<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By them, alas! so much detested.&#8221;</span></p>
+
+<div class="figleft"><img src="images/img_pg045.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>But the wives are not always unwise in their opposition to their husband&#8217;s
+book-buying. There is nothing more pitiful than to see the widow of a poor
+clergyman or lawyer trying to sell his library, and to witness her
+disappointment at the <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> shrinkage of value which she had been taught and
+accustomed to regard as so<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_46" id="Page_46">[Pg 46]</a></span> great. A woman who has a true and wise
+sympathy with her husband&#8217;s book-buying is an adored object. I recollect
+one such, who at her own suggestion gave up the largest and best room in
+her house to her husband&#8217;s books, and received her callers and guests in a
+smaller one&mdash;she also received her husband&#8217;s blessing.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/flower.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_47" id="Page_47">[Pg 47]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="VIII" id="VIII"></a>VIII.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">THE ILLUSTRATOR.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t.jpg" alt="T" /></span>he popular notion of the Illustrator, as the term is used by the
+Book-Worm, is that he buys many valuable books containing pictures and
+spoils them by tearing the pictures out, and from them constructs another
+valuable book with pictures. We smile to read this in the newspapers. If
+it were strictly true it would be a very reprehensible practice. But
+generally the books compelled to surrender their prints to the Illustrator
+are good for nothing else. To lament over them is as foolish as to grieve
+over the grape-skins out of which has been pressed the luscious
+Johannisburger, or to mourn over the unsightly holes which the
+porcelain-potter has made in the clay-bank. Even among Book-Worms the
+Illustrator, or the &#8220;Grangerite,&#8221; as the term of reproach is, has come in
+for many hard knocks in recent years. John Hill Burton set the tune by his
+merry satire in &#8220;The Book-Hunter,&#8221; in which he portrays the Grangerite
+illustrating the pious Watts&#8217; stanzas, beginning, &#8220;How doth the little
+busy bee.&#8221; In his first edition Mr. Burton mentioned among &#8220;great writers
+on bees,&#8221; whose portrait would be desirable, Aristarchus, <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> meaning probably
+Aristomachus. This mistake is not<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_48" id="Page_48">[Pg 48]</a></span> corrected in the last edition, but the
+name is omitted altogether <img src="images/acorn.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>Mr. Beverly Chew &#8220;drops into poetry&#8221; on the subject, and thus
+apostrophises the Grangerite:</p>
+
+<p class="poem"><span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;Ah, ruthless wight,</span><br />
+Think of the books you&#8217;ve turned to waste,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With patient skill.&#8221;</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg048.jpg" alt="M" /></span>r. Henri Pere Du Bois thus describes the ordinary result: &#8220;Of one hundred
+books extended by the insertion of prints which were not made for them,
+ninety-nine are ruined; <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> the hundredth book is no longer a book; it is a
+museum. An imperfect book, built with the spoils of a thousand books; a
+crazy quilt made of patches out of gowns of queens and scullions.&#8221; So
+Burton compares the Grangerite to Genghis Kahn. Mr. Lang declares the
+Grangerites are &#8220;book ghouls, and brood, like the obscene demons of
+Arabian superstition, over the fragments of the mighty dead.&#8221; I would like
+to show Mr. Lang how I have treated his &#8220;Letters to Dead Authors&#8221; and &#8220;Old
+Friends&#8221; by illustration. He would probably feel, with &AElig;sop&#8217;s lawyer, that
+&#8220;circumstances alter cases,&#8221; although he says &#8220;no book deserves the
+honor&#8221; <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>So a reviewer in &#8220;The Nation&#8221; stigmatises Grangerism as &#8220;a vampire art,
+maiming when it does not murder&#8221; (I did not know that vampires &#8220;maim&#8221;
+their victims) &#8220;and incapable of rising beyond <span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_49" id="Page_49">[Pg 49]</a></span>canibalism&#8221; (not that they
+feed on one another, but when critics get excited their metaphors are apt
+to become mixed) <img src="images/leaves.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>&#8220;G. W. S.,&#8221; of the New York &#8220;Tribune,&#8221; speaks of the achievement of the
+Illustrators as &#8220;colossal vulgarities.&#8221; Mr. Percy Fitzgerald observes:
+&#8220;The pitiless Grangerite slaughters a book for a few pictures, just as an
+epicure has had a sheep killed for the sweetbread&#8221; <img src="images/acorn.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t2.jpg" alt="T" /></span>hese are very choice hard words. There is much extravagance, but some
+justice in all this criticism. As a question of economics I do not find
+any great difference between a Book-worm who spends thousands of dollars
+in constructing one attractive book from several not attractive, and one
+who spends a thousand dollars in binding a book, or for an example of a
+famous old binder. If there is any difference it is in favor of the
+Grangerite, who improves the volume for the intelligent purposes of the
+reader, as against the other who merely caters to &#8220;the lust of the eye&#8221; <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>I am willing to concede that the Grangerite is sometimes guilty of some
+gross offenses against good taste and good sense. The worst of these is
+when he extends the text of the volume itself to a larger page in order to
+embrace large prints. This is grotesque, for it spoils the very book. He
+is also blamable when he squanders valuable prints and time and patience
+on mere book lumber, such as long rows of histories; and when he stuffs
+and crams his book; and when<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_50" id="Page_50">[Pg 50]</a></span> his pictures are not of the era of the
+events or of the time of life of the persons described; and when they are
+too large or too small to be in just proportion to the printed page; and
+when the book is so heavy and cumbersome that no one can handle it with
+comfort or convenience. Above all he is blamable, in my estimation, when
+he entrusts the selection of prints to an agent. Such agency is frequently
+very unsatisfactory, and at all events the Illustrator misses the sport of
+the hunt. Few men would entrust the furnishing or decorating of a house,
+the purchase of a horse, or the selection of a wife to a third person, and
+the delicate matter of choosing prints for a book is essentially one to be
+transacted in person. The danger of any other procedure in the case of a
+wife was illustrated by Cromwell&#8217;s agency for Henry Eighth in the affair
+of Anne of Cleves, the &#8220;Flanders mare.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_b.jpg" alt="B" /></span>ut when it is properly done, it seems to me that the very best thing the
+Book-Worm ever does is to illustrate his books, because this insures his
+reading them, at least with his fingers. Not always, for a certain
+chronicler of collections of privately illustrated books in this country
+narrates, how &#8220;relying upon the index&#8221; of a book, which he illustrated, he
+inserted a portrait of Sam Johnson, the famous, whereas &#8220;the text called
+for Sam Johnson, an eccentric dramatic writer,&#8221; etc. His binder, he says,
+laughed at him for being ignorant that there &#8220;two Sam Johnsons&#8221; (there are
+four in the biographical dictionaries, one of whom was an<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_51" id="Page_51">[Pg 51]</a></span> early president
+of King&#8217;s College in New York). But if done personally and conscientiously
+it is a means of valuable culture. As one of the oldest survivors of the
+genus Illustrator in this country, I have thus assumed to offer an apology
+and defense for my much berated kind. And now let me make a few
+suggestions as to what seems to me the most suitable mode of the pursuit.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/flame.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_52" id="Page_52">[Pg 52]</a></span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg052.jpg" alt="I" /></span>n illustrating there seem to be two methods, which may be described as
+the literal or realistic, and imaginative. The first consists simply in
+the insertion of portraits, views and scenes appropriate to the text. A
+pleasing variety may be imparted to this method by substituting for a mere
+portrait a scene in the life of the celebrity in question <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> For example,
+if Charles V. and Titian are mentioned together, it would be interesting
+to insert a picture representing the historical incident of the emperor
+picking up and handing the artist a brush which he had dropped&mdash;and one
+will have an interesting hunt to find it. But I am more an adherent of the
+romantic school, which finds excellent play in the illustration of poetry.
+For example, in the poem, &#8220;Ennui,&#8221; in &#8220;The Croakers,&#8221; for the line, &#8220;The
+fiend, the fiend is on me still,&#8221; I found, after a search of some years, a
+picture of an imp sitting on the breast of a man in bed with the gout. In
+the same stanza are the lines, &#8220;Like a cruel cat, that sucks a child to
+death,&#8221; and for this I have a print from a children&#8217;s magazine, of a cat
+squatting on the breast of a child in a cradle. Now I would like &#8220;a
+Madagascar bat,&#8221; which rhymes to &#8220;cat&#8221;<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_53" id="Page_53">[Pg 53]</a></span> in the poem. &#8220;And like a tom-cat
+dies by inches,&#8221; is illustrated by a picture of a cat caught by the paw in
+a steel trap. &#8220;Simon&#8221; was &#8220;a gentleman of color,&#8221; the favorite pastry cook
+and caterer of New York half a century ago&mdash;before the days of Mr. Ward
+McAllister. &#8220;The Croaker&#8221; advises him to &#8220;buy an eye-glass and become a
+dandy and a gentleman.&#8221; This is illustrated by a rare and fine print of a
+colored gentleman, dressed in breeches, silk stockings, and ruffled shirt,
+scanning an overdressed lady of African descent through an eye-glass. &#8220;The
+ups and downs of politics&#8221; is illustrated by a Cruikshank print, the upper
+part of which shows a party making an ascension in a balloon and the lower
+part a party making a descent in a diving-bell, and entitled &#8220;the ups and
+downs of life.&#8221; To illustrate the phrase, &#8220;seeing the elephant,&#8221; take the
+print of Pyrrhus trying to frighten his captive, Fabricus, by suddenly
+drawing the curtains of his tent and showing him an elephant with his
+trunk raised in a baggage-smashing attitude. For &#8220;The Croakers&#8221; there are
+apt illustrations also of the following queer subjects: Korah, Dathan and
+Abiram; Miss Atropos, shut up your Scissors; Albany&#8217;s two Steeples high in
+Air, Reading Cobbett&#8217;s Register, Bony in His Prison Isle, Giant Wife,
+Beauty and The Beast, Fly Market, Tammany Hall, The Dove from Noah&#8217;s Ark,
+Rome Saved by Geese, C&aelig;sar Offered a Crown, C&aelig;sar Crossing the Rubicon,
+Dick Ricker&#8217;s Bust, Sancho in His Island Reigning, The Wisest of Wild
+Fowl, Reynold&#8217; Beer House, A<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_54" id="Page_54">[Pg 54]</a></span> Mummy, A Chimney Sweep, The Arab&#8217;s Wind,
+Pygmalion, Danae, Highland Chieftain with His Tail On, Nightmare, Shaking
+Quakers, Polony&#8217;s Crazy Daughter, Bubble-Blowing, First Pair of Breeches,
+Banquo&#8217;s Ghost, Press Gang, Fair Lady With the Bandaged Eye, A Warrior
+Leaning on His Sword, A Warrior&#8217;s Tomb, A Duel, and A Street Flirtation.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_a.jpg" alt="A" /></span>s the charm of illustrating consists in the hunt for the prints, so the
+latter method is the more engrossing because the game is the more
+difficult to run down. Portraits, views and scenes are plenty, but to find
+them properly adaptable is frequently difficult. Some things which one
+would suppose readily procurable are really hard to find. For example, it
+was a weary chase to get a treadmill, and so of a drum-major, although the
+latter is now not uncommon: and although I know it exists, I have not
+attained unto a bastinado. Sirens and mermaids are rather retiring, and
+when Vedder depicted the Sea-Serpent he conferred a boon on Illustrators.
+&#8220;God&#8217;s Scales,&#8221; in which the mendicant weighs down the rich man, is a
+rarity. Milton leaving his card on Galileo in prison is among my wants,
+although I have seen it <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>As to scarce portraits, let me sing a song of</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">THE SHY PORTRAITS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_o.jpg" alt="O" /></span>h, why do you elude me so&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Ye portraits that so long I&#8217;ve sought?</span><br />
+That somewhere ye exist, I know&mdash;<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_55" id="Page_55">[Pg 55]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Indifferent, good, and good for naught.</span><br />
+<br />
+Lucrezia, of the poisoned cup,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Why do you shrink away by stealth?</span><br />
+To view your &#8220;mug&#8221; with you I&#8217;d sup,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And even dare to drink your health.</span><br />
+<br />
+Oh! why so coy, Godiva fair?<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You&#8217;re covered by your shining tresses,</span><br />
+And I would promise not to stare<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">At sheerest of go-diving dresses.</span><br />
+<br />
+Come out, old Bluebeard; don&#8217;t be shy!<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You&#8217;re not so bad as Froude&#8217;s great hero;</span><br />
+Xantippe, fear no law gone by<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When scolds were ducked in ponds at zero.</span><br />
+<br />
+Not mealy-mouthed was Mrs. Behn,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And prudish was satiric Jane,</span><br />
+But equally they both shun men,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As if they bore the mark of Cain.</span><br />
+<br />
+George Barrington, you may return<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To country which you &#8220;left for good;&#8221;</span><br />
+Psalmanazar, I would not spurn<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Your language when &#8217;twas understood.</span><br />
+<br />
+Jean Grolier, you left many books&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They come so dear I must ignore &#8217;em&mdash;</span><br />
+But there&#8217;s no evidence of your looks<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For us surviving &#8220;amicorum.&#8221;</span><br />
+<br />
+This country&#8217;s overrun by grangers&mdash;<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_56" id="Page_56">[Pg 56]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">I&#8217;m ignorant of their christian names</span><br />
+But my afflicted eyes are strangers<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To one I want whom men call James.</span><br />
+<br />
+There&#8217;s Heber, man of many books&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You&#8217;re far more modest than the Bishop;</span><br />
+I&#8217;m curious to learn your looks,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And care for nothing shown at his shop.</span><br />
+<br />
+And oh! that wondrous, pattern child!<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">His truthfulness, no one can match it;</span><br />
+Dear little George! I&#8217;m almost wild<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To find a wood-cut of his hatchet.</span><br />
+<br />
+Show forth your face, Anonymous,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Whose name is in the books I con</span><br />
+Most frequently; so famous thus,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Will you not come to me anon?</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_b.jpg" alt="B" /></span>y way of jest I have inserted an anonymous portrait opposite an anonymous
+poem, and was once gravely asked by an absent-minded friend if it really
+was the portrait of the author. One however will probably look in vain for
+portraits of &#8220;Quatorze&#8221; and &#8220;Quinze,&#8221; for which a print seller of New York
+once had an inquiry, and I have been told of a collector who returned
+Arlington because of the cut on his nose, and Ogle because of his damaged
+eye. But there is more sport in hunting for a dodo than a rabbit <img src="images/acorn.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>It is also a pleasant thing to lay a picture occasionally in a book
+without setting out to illustrate it <span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_57" id="Page_57">[Pg 57]</a></span>regularly, so that it may break upon
+one as a surprise when he takes up the book years afterward. It is a
+grateful surprise to find in Ruskin&#8217;s &#8220;Modern Painters&#8221; a casual print
+from Roger&#8217;s &#8220;Italy,&#8221; and in Hamerton&#8217;s books some sporadic etchings by
+Rembrandt or Hayden. It is like discovering an unexpected &#8220;quarter&#8221; in the
+pocket of an old waistcoat. For example, in &#8220;With Thackeray in America,&#8221;
+Mr. Eyre Crowe tells how the second number of the first edition of &#8220;The
+Newcomes&#8221; came to the author when he was in Paris, and how he found fault
+with Doyle&#8217;s illustration of the games of the Charterhouse boys. He says:
+&#8220;The peccant accessory which roused the wrath of the writer was the group
+of two boys playing at marbles on the left of the spectator. &#8216;Why,&#8217; said
+the irate author, &#8216;they would as soon thought of cutting off their heads
+as play marbles at the Charterhouse!&#8217; This woodcut was, I noticed,
+suppressed altogether in subsequent editions.&#8221; Now in my copy&mdash;not being
+the possessor of the first edition&mdash;I have made a reference to Mr. Crowe&#8217;s
+passage, and supplied the suppressed cut from an early American copy which
+cost me twenty-five cents. How many of the first edition men know of the
+interesting fact narrated by Mr. Crowe? The Illustrator ought always at
+least to insert the portrait of the author whenever it has been omitted by
+the publisher <img src="images/img_pg057.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>Second: What to illustrate. The Illustrator should not be an imitator or
+follower, but should strive after an unhackneyed subject. A man is not apt
+to marry<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_58" id="Page_58">[Pg 58]</a></span> the woman who flings herself at his head; he loves the
+excitement of courting; and so there is not much amusement in utilizing
+common pictures, but the charm consists in hunting for scarce ones. It is
+very natural to tread in others&#8217; tracks, and easy, because the market
+affords plenty of material for the common subjects. Shakespeare and Walton
+and Boswell&#8217;s Johnson, and a few other things of that sort, have been done
+to death, and there is fairer scope in something else. Biographies of
+Painters, Elia&#8217;s Essays, Sir Thomas Browne&#8217;s &#8220;Religio Medici&#8221; and &#8220;Urn
+Burial,&#8221; &#8220;Childe Harold,&#8221; Horace, Virgil, the Life of Bayard, or of
+Vittoria Colonna, or Philip Sidney, and Sappho are charming subjects, and
+not too common. A ponderous or voluminous work lends itself less
+conveniently to the purpose than a small book in one or two volumes. Great
+quartos and folios are mere mausoleums or repositories for expensive
+prints, too huge to handle, and too extensive for any one ever to look
+through, and therefore they afford little pleasure to the owners or their
+guests. An illustrated Shakespeare in thirty volumes is theoretically a
+very grand object, but I should never have the heart to open it, and as
+for histories, I should as soon think of illustrating a dictionary. Walton
+is a lovely subject, but I would adopt a small copy and keep it within two
+or three volumes. After all there is nothing so charming as a single
+little illustrated volume, like &#8220;Ballads of Books,&#8221; compiled by Brander
+Matthews; Andrew Lang&#8217;s &#8220;Letters to<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_59" id="Page_59">[Pg 59]</a></span> Dead Authors,&#8221; or &#8220;Old Friends,&#8221;
+Friswell&#8217;s &#8220;Varia,&#8221; the &#8220;Book of Death,&#8221; &#8220;Melodies and Madrigals,&#8221; &#8220;The
+Book of Rubies,&#8221; Winter&#8217;s &#8220;Shakespeare&#8217;s England.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_a.jpg" alt="A" /></span> gentleman who published, a good many years ago, a monograph of privately
+illustrated books in this country, spoke of the work that I had done in
+this field, and criticised me for my &#8220;apparent want of method,&#8221;
+&#8220;eccentricity,&#8221; &#8220;madness,&#8221; &#8220;vagaries,&#8221; &#8220;omnivorousness,&#8221; and &#8220;lack of
+speciality or system,&#8221; and finally, although he blamed me for having
+illustrated pretty much everything, he also blamed me for not having
+illustrated any &#8220;biographical works.&#8221; This criticism seems not only
+inconsistent, but without basis, for one man may not dictate to another
+what he shall prefer to illustrate for his own amusement, any more than
+what sort of a house or pictures he shall buy or what complexion or
+stature his wife shall have. The author also did me the honor to spell my
+name wrong, and did the famous Greek amatory poet the honor of mentioning
+among my illustrated work, &#8220;Odes to Anacreon.&#8221; Would that I could find
+that book! <img src="images/acorn_var1.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>I offer these suggestions with diffidence, and with no intention to impose
+my taste upon others <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>If the Illustrator can get or make something absolutely unique he is a
+fortunate man. For example, I know one, stigmatized as eccentric, who has
+illustrated a printed catalogue of his own library with<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_60" id="Page_60">[Pg 60]</a></span> portraits of the
+authors, copies of prints in the books, and duplicates of engraved
+title-pages; also one who has illustrated a collection in print or in
+manuscript of his own poems; also one who has illustrated a Life of
+Hercules, written by himself, printed by one of his own family, and
+adorned with prints from antique gems and other subjects; and even a
+lawyer who has illustrated a law book written by himself, in which he has
+found place for prints so diverse and apparently out of keeping as Jonah
+and the whale, John Brown, a man pacing the floor in a nightgown with a
+crying baby, a &#8220;darkey&#8221; shot in a melon-patch, an elephant on the rampage,
+Cupid, Hudibras writing a letter, Joanna Southcote, Launce and his dog, a
+dog catching a boy going over a wall, Dr. Watts, Robinson Crusoe, Barnum
+in the form of a hum-bug, Jacob Hall the rope dancer, Lord Mayor&#8217;s
+procession, Raphael discoursing to Adam, gathering sea-weed, Artemus Ward,
+a whale ashore, a barber-shop, Gilpin&#8217;s ride, King Lear, St. Lawrence on
+his gridiron, Charles Lamb, Terpsichore, and a child tumbling into a well.
+The owner of such a book may be sure that it is unique, as the man was
+certain his coat of arms was genuine, because he made it himself <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>Third: the Illustrator should not be in a hurry.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t2.jpg" alt="T" /></span>here are three singular things about the hunt for pictures. One is, the
+moment you have your book bound, no matter how many years you may have
+waited, some rare picture you wanted is sure to turn up. Hence<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_61" id="Page_61">[Pg 61]</a></span> the
+reluctance of the Illustrator to commit himself to binding, a reluctance
+only paralleled by that of the lover to marry the woman he had courted for
+ten years, because then he would have no place to spend his evenings. (I
+have had books &#8220;in hand&#8221; for twenty years).</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_a.jpg" alt="A" /></span>nother is, when you have found your rare picture you are pretty certain
+to find one or two duplicates. Prints, like accidents or crimes, seem to
+come in cycles and schools. I have known a man to search in vain in thirty
+print-shops in London, and coming home find what he wanted in a New York
+print-shop, and two copies at that. The third is, that you are continually
+coming very near the object without quite attaining it. Thus one may get
+Lady Godiva alone, and the effigy of Peeping Tom on the corner of an old
+house at Coventry, but to procure the whole scene is, so far as I know,
+out of the question. It would seem that Mr. Anthony Comstock has put his
+ban on it. So one will find it difficult to get &#8220;God&#8217;s scales,&#8221; in which
+wealth and poverty are weighed against each other, but I have had other
+scales thrust at me, such as those in which the emblems of love are
+weighed against those of religion, and a king against a beggar, but even
+the latter is not the precise thing, for in these days there are poor
+kings and rich beggars <img src="images/leaves.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>One opinion in which all illustrators agree seems sound, and that is, that
+photographs are not to be tolerated. Photography is the most
+misrepresentative<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_62" id="Page_62">[Pg 62]</a></span> of arts. But an exception may be indulged in the case
+of those few celebrities who are too modest to allow themselves to be
+engraved, and of whom photography furnishes the only portraiture <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> A
+photographic copy of a rare portrait in oil is also admissible. Some also
+exclude wood-cuts. I am not such a purist as that. They are frequently the
+only means of illustrating a subject, and small and fine wood-cuts form
+charming head and tail pieces and marginal adornments. One who eschews
+wood-cuts must forego such interesting little subjects as Washington and
+his little hatchet, God&#8217;s scales, the skeleton in the closet, and many of
+those which I have particularized <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> I flatter myself that I have made the
+margins of a good many books very interesting by means of small wood-cuts,
+of which our modern magazines provide an abundant and exquisite supply.
+These furnish a copious source of specific illustration.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/leaves_jag.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_63" id="Page_63">[Pg 63]</a></span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg063.jpg" alt="W" /></span>ith their zeal illustrators are sometimes apt to be anachronistic. Every
+book ought to be illustrated in the spirit and costume of its time. The
+book should not be stuffed too full of prints; let a better proportion be
+preserved between the text and the illustrations than Falstaff observed
+between his bread and his sack. The prints should not be so numerous as to
+cause the text to be forgotten, as in the case of a tedious sermon <img src="images/acorns.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>Probably nearly every collector expects that his treasures will be
+dispersed at his death, if not sooner. But it is a serious question to the
+illustrator, what will become of these precious objects upon which he has
+spent so much time, thought and labor, and for which he has expended so
+much money. He never cares and rarely knows, and if he knows he never
+tells, how much they have cost, but he may always be certain that they
+will never fetch their cost. Let us not indulge in any false dreams on
+this subject. The time may have<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_64" id="Page_64">[Pg 64]</a></span> been when prints were cheap and when the
+illustrator may have been able to make himself whole or even reap a
+profit, but that day I believe has gone by <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> One can hardly expect that
+his family will care for these things; the son generally thinks the
+Book-Worm a bore, and the wife of one&#8217;s bosom and the daughter of one&#8217;s
+heart usually affect more interest than they feel, and if they kept such
+objects would do so from a sense of duty alone, as the ancient Romans
+preserved the cinerary urns of their ancestors. For myself, I have often
+imagined my grandson listlessly turning over one of my favorite
+illustrated volumes, and saying, &#8220;What a funny old duffer grandad must
+have been!&#8221; Such a book-club, as the &#8220;Grolier,&#8221; of New York, is a
+fortunate avenue of escape from these evils. There one might deposit at
+least some of his peculiar treasures, certain that they would receive good
+care, be regarded with permanent interest, and keep alive his memory.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t2.jpg" alt="T" /></span>o augment his books by inserting prints is ordinarily just the one thing
+which the Book-Worm can do to render them in a deeper sense his own, and
+to gain for himself a peculiar proprietorship in them. Generally he cannot
+himself bind them, but by this means he may render himself a coadjutor of
+the author, and place himself on equal terms with the printer and the
+binder <img src="images/leaves.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>After he has illustrated a favorite book once, it is an enjoyable
+occupation for the Book-Worm to do it over<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_65" id="Page_65">[Pg 65]</a></span> again, in a different spirit
+and with different pictures. &#8220;Second thoughts are best,&#8221; it has been said,
+and I have more than once improved my subject by a second treatment <img src="images/img_pg065.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>There is another form of illustration, of which I have not spoken, and
+that is the insertion of clippings from magazines and newspapers in the
+fly leaves. Sometimes these are of intense interest. My own Dickens,
+Thackeray and Hawthorne, in particular have their porticoes and posterms
+plentifully supplied with material of this sort <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> The latest contribution
+of this kind is to &#8220;Martin Chuzzlewit,&#8221; and consists in the information
+that a western American &#8220;land-shark&#8221; has recently swindled people by
+selling them swamp-lots, attractively depicted on a map and named Eden <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" />
+In my Pepys I have laid Mr. Lang&#8217;s recent letter to the diarist. So on a
+fly leaf of Hawthorne&#8217;s Life it is pleasing to see a cut of his little red
+house at Lenox, now destroyed by fire.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/flame.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_66" id="Page_66">[Pg 66]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="IX" id="IX"></a>IX.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">BOOK-PLATES.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_a2.jpg" alt="A" /></span> rather modern form of book-spoliation has arisen in the collection of
+book-plates. These are literally derived &#8220;ex libris,&#8221; and the business
+cannot be indulged, as a general thing, without in some sense despoiling
+books. It cannot be denied that it is a fascinating pursuit. So
+undoubtedly is the taking of watches or rings or other &#8220;articles of
+bigotry or virtue,&#8221; on the highway <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> But somehow there is something so
+essentially personal in a book-plate, that it is hard to understand why
+other persons than the owners should become possessed by a passion for it.
+Many years ago when Burton, the great comedian, was in his prime, he used
+to act in a farce called &#8220;Toodles&#8221;&mdash;at all events, that was his name in
+the play&mdash;and he was afflicted with a wife who had a mania for attending
+auctions and buying all kinds of things, useful or useless, provided that
+they only seemed cheap. One day she came home with a door-plate,
+inscribed, &#8220;Thompson&#8221;&mdash;&#8220;Thompson with a p,&#8221; as Toodles wrathfully
+described it; and this was more than Toodles could stand. He could not see
+what possible use there could ever be in that door-plate for the Toodles
+family. In those same days, there used to be<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_67" id="Page_67">[Pg 67]</a></span> displayed on the door of a
+modest house, on the east side of Broadway, in the city of New York,
+somewhere about Eighth Street, a silver door-plate inscribed, &#8220;Mr. Astor.&#8221;
+This appertained to the original John Jacob <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> In those days I frequently
+remarked it, and thought what a prize it would be to Mrs. Toodles or some
+collector of door-plates. Now I can understand why one might acquire a
+taste for collecting book-plates of distinguished men or famous
+book-collectors, just as one collects autographs; but why collect hundreds
+and thousands of book-plates of undistinguished and even unknown persons,
+frequently consisting of nothing more than family coats-of-arms, or mere
+family names? I must confess that I share to a certain extent in Mr.
+Lang&#8217;s antipathy to this species of collecting, and am disposed to call
+down on these collectors Shakespeare&#8217;s curse on him who should move his
+bones. But I cannot go with Mr. Lang when he calls these well-meaning and
+by no means mischevious persons some hard names.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>n some localities it is quite the vogue to take off the coffin-plate from
+the coffin&mdash;all the other silver &#8220;trimmings,&#8221; too, for that matter&mdash;and
+preserve it, and even have it framed and hung up in the home of the late
+lamented. There may be a sense of proprietorship in the mourners, who have
+bought and paid for it, and see no good reason for burying it, that will
+justify this practice. At all events it is a family matter. The coffin
+plate reminds the desolate survivors of the person <span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_68" id="Page_68">[Pg 68]</a></span>designated, who is
+shelved forever in the dust. But what would be said of the sense or sanity
+of one who should go about collecting and framing coffin-plates,
+cataloguing them, and even exchanging them?</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_b.jpg" alt="B" /></span>ook-worms penetrate to different distances in books. Some go no further
+than the title page; others dig into the preface or bore into the table of
+contents; a few begin excavations at the close, to see &#8220;how it comes out.&#8221;
+But that Worm is most easily satisfied who never goes beyond the inside of
+the front cover, and passes his time in prying off the book-plates <img src="images/leaf_l.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>I think I have heard of persons who collect colophons. These go to work in
+the reverse direction, and are even more reprehensible than the
+accumulators of book-plates, because they inevitably ruin the book <img src="images/acorn_var2.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>A book-plate is appropriate, sometimes ornamental, even beautiful, in its
+intended place in the proprietor&#8217;s book. Out of that, with rare
+exceptions, it strikes one like the coffin-plate, framed and hanging on
+the wall <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> It gives additional value and attractiveness to a book which
+one buys, but it ought to remain there <img src="images/leaves.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>If one purchases books once owned by A, B and C&mdash;undistinguished persons,
+or even distinguished&mdash;containing their autographs, he does not cut them
+out to form a collection of autographs <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> If the name is not celebrated,
+the autograph has no interest or value; if famous, it has still greater
+interest and value by<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_69" id="Page_69">[Pg 69]</a></span> remaining in the book. So it seems to me it should
+be in respect to book-plates <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> Let Mr. Astor&#8217;s door-plate stay on his
+front door, and let the energetic Mrs. Toodles content herself in buying
+something less invididual and more adaptable.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg069.jpg" alt="A" /></span> book-plate really is of no value except to the owner, as the man says of
+papers which he has lost. It cannot be utilized to mark the possessions of
+another. In this respect it is of inferior value to the door-plate, for
+possibly another Mr. Astor might arise, to whom the orignal door-plate
+might be sold. A Boston newspaper tells of a peddler of door-plates who
+contracted to sell a Salem widow a door-plate; and when she gave him her
+name to be engraved on it, gave only her surname, objecting to any first
+name or initials, observing: &#8220;I might get married again, and if my
+initials or first name were on the plate, it would be of no use. If they
+are left off, the plate could be used by my son.&#8221; <img src="images/acorn_var3.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>Thus much about collecting book-plates. One word may be tolerated about
+the character of one&#8217;s own book-plate. To my taste, mere coats-of-arms
+with mottoes are not the best form. <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> They simply denote ownership. They
+might well answer some further purpose, as for example to typify the
+peculiar tastes of the proprietor in respect to his books. A portrait of
+the owner is not objectionable, indeed is quite welcome in connection with
+some device or motto<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_70" id="Page_70">[Pg 70]</a></span> pertaining to books and not to mere family descent.
+But why, although a collector may have a favorite author, like Hawthorne
+or Thackeray, for example, should he insert his portrait in his
+book-plate, as is often done? Mr. Howells would writhe in his grave if he
+knew that somebody had stuck Thackeray&#8217;s portrait or Scott&#8217;s in &#8220;Silas
+Lapham,&#8221; and those Calvinists who think that the &#8220;Scarlet Letter&#8221; is
+wicked, would pronounce damnation on the man who should put the gentle
+Hawthorne&#8217;s portrait in a religious book <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> To be sure, one might have a
+variety of book-plates, with portraits appropriate to different kinds of
+books&mdash;Napoleon&#8217;s for military, Calvin for religious, Walton&#8217;s for angling
+and a composite portrait of Howells-James for fiction of the photographic
+school; but this would involve expense and destroy the intrinsic unity
+desirable in the book-plate. So let the portrait, if any, be either that
+of the proprietor or a conventional image. If I were to relax and allow a
+single exception it would be in favor of dear Charles Lamb&#8217;s portrait in
+&#8220;Fraser&#8217;s,&#8221; representing him as reading a book by candle light. (For the
+moment this idea pleases me so much that I feel half inclined to eat all
+my foregoing words on this point, and adopt it for myself. At any rate, I
+hereby preempt the privilege.)</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span> have referred to Mr. Lang&#8217;s antipathy to book-plate collectors, and
+while, as I have observed, he goes to extravagant lengths in condemning
+their pursuit, still it may be of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_71" id="Page_71">[Pg 71]</a></span> interest to my readers to know just
+what he says about them, and so I reproduce below a ballad on the subject,
+with (the material for) which he kindly supplied me when I solicited his
+mild expression of opinion on the subject:</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 4em;">THE SNATCHERS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_t.jpg" alt="T" /></span>he Romans snatched the Sabine wives;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The crime had some extenuation,</span><br />
+For they were leading lonely lives<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And driven to reckless desperation.</span><br />
+<br />
+Lord Elgin stripped the Grecian frieze<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of all its marbles celebrated,</span><br />
+So our art-students now with ease<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Consult the figures overrated.</span><br />
+<br />
+Napoleon stole the southern pictures<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And hung them up to grace the Louvre;</span><br />
+And though he could not make them fixtures,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They answered as an art-improver.</span><br />
+<br />
+Bold men ransack an Egyptian tomb,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And with the mummies there make free;</span><br />
+Such intermeddling with Time&#8217;s womb<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">May aid in archeology.</span><br />
+<br />
+So Cruncher dug up graves in haste,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To sell the corpses to the doctors;</span><br />
+This trade was not against his taste,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Though Misses &#8220;flopped,&#8221; and vowed it shocked hers.</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_72" id="Page_72">[Pg 72]</a></span><br />
+The modern snatcher sponges leaves<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And boards of books to crib their labels;</span><br />
+Most petty, trivial of thieves,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Surpassing all we read in fables.</span><br />
+<br />
+He pastes them in a big, blank book<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To show them to some rival fool,</span><br />
+And I pronounce him, when I look,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">An almost idiotic ghoul.</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/leaves_jag.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_73" id="Page_73">[Pg 73]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="X" id="X"></a>X.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">THE BOOK-AUCTIONEER.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t.jpg" alt="T" /></span>here is one
+figure that stands in a very unpleasant relation to books <img src="images/leaves.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>If anybody has any curiosity to know what I consider the most undesirable
+occupation of mankind, I will answer candidly&mdash;that of an auctioneer of
+private libraries. It does not seem to have fallen into disrepute like
+that of the headsman or hangman, and perhaps it is as unpleasantly
+essential as that of the undertaker. But it generally thrives on the
+unhappiness of those who are compelled to part with their books, on the
+rivalries of the rich, and the strifes of the trade <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> It was urged
+against Mr. Cleveland, on his first canvass for the Presidency, that when
+he was sheriff he had hanged a murderer. For my own part, I admired him
+for performing that solemn office himself rather than hiring an underling
+to do it. But if he had been a book-auctioneer, I might have been
+prejudiced against him <img src="images/acorn_var2.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>Not so ignoble and inhuman perhaps as that of the slave-seller, still the
+business must breed a sort of callousness which is abhorrent to the genial
+Book-Worm. How I hate the glib rattle of his tongue, the mouldiness of his
+jests and the transparency of his<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_74" id="Page_74">[Pg 74]</a></span> puffery! I should think he would hate
+himself. It must be worse than acting Hamlet or Humpty Dumpty a hundred
+consecutive nights <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> Dante had no punishment for the Book-Worm in hell,
+if I remember right, but if he deserved any pitiless reprobation, it would
+be found in compelling him to cry off books to all eternity <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> Grant that
+the auctioneer is a person of sensibility and acquainted with good books,
+then his calling must give him many a pang as he observes the ignorance
+and carelessness of his audience. It is better and more fitting that he
+should know little of his wares. He ought to be well paid for his work,
+and he is&mdash;no man gets so much for mere talk except the lawyer, and
+perhaps not even he. I do not so much complain of his favoritism. When
+there is something especially desirable going, I frequently fail to catch
+his eye, and my rival gets the prize <img src="images/img_pg074.jpg" alt="" /> But in this he is no worse than
+the Speaker. On the other hand he sometimes loads me up with a thing that
+I do not want, and in possession of which I would be unwilling to be found
+dead, pretending that I winked at him&mdash;a species of imposition which it is
+impolitic to resent for fear of being entirely ignored. These
+discretionary favors are regarded as a practical joke and must not be
+declined <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> But what I do complain of is his commercial stolidity,
+surpassing that of Charles Surface when he sold the portraits of his
+ancestors. The &#8220;bete noir&#8221; of the book trade is <img src="images/acorn.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_75" id="Page_75">[Pg 75]</a></span></p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: -.75em;">THE STOLID AUCTIONEER.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_l.jpg" alt="L" /></span>et not a sad ghost<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">From the scribbling host</span><br />
+Revisit this workaday sphere;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He&#8217;ll find in the sequel</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">All talents are equal</span><br />
+When they come to the auctioneer.<br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Not a whit cares he</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">What the book may be,</span><br />
+Whether missal with glorious show,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A folio Shakespeare,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Or an Elzevir,</span><br />
+Or a Tupper, or E. P. Roe.<br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Without any qualms</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He knocks down the Psalms,</span><br />
+Or the chaste Imitatio,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And takes the same pains</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To enhance his gains</span><br />
+With a ribald Boccaccio.<br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He rattles them off,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Not stopping to cough,</span><br />
+He shows no distinction of person;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">One minute&#8217;s enough</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For similar stuff</span><br />
+Like Shelley and Ossian Macpherson.<br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A Paradise Lost</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is had for less cost</span><br />
+Than a bulky &#8220;fifteener&#8221; in Greek,<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_76" id="Page_76">[Pg 76]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">And Addison&#8217;s prose</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Quite frequently goes</span><br />
+For a tenth of a worthless &#8220;unique.&#8221;<br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">This formula stale</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of his will avail</span><br />
+For an epitaph meet for his rank,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When dropping his gavel</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He falls in the gravel,</span><br />
+&#8220;Do I hear nothing more?&mdash;gone&mdash;to&mdash;?</p></div>
+
+<p>I speak feelingly, but I think it is pardonable. I once went through an
+auction sale of my own books, and while I lost money on volumes on which I
+had bestowed much thought, labor and expense, I made a profit on Gibbon&#8217;s
+&#8220;Decline and Fall&#8221; in tree-calf. I do not complain of the loss; what I was
+mortified by was the profit. But the auctioneer was not at all abashed; in
+fact he seemed rather pleased, and apparently regarded it as a feather in
+his cap. I have always suspected that the shameless purchaser was Silas
+Wegg.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/flame.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_77" id="Page_77">[Pg 77]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="XI" id="XI"></a>XI.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">THE BOOKSELLER.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg077.jpg" alt="C" /></span>onsidering his importance in modern civilization, it is singular that so
+little has been recorded of the Bookseller in literature. Shakespeare has
+a great deal to say of books of various kinds, but not a word, I believe,
+of the Bookseller. It is true that Ursa Major gave a mitigated growl of
+applause to the booksellers, if I recollect my Boswell right, and he
+condescended to write a life of Cave, but bookseller in his view meant
+publisher. It is true that Charles Knight wrote a book entitled &#8220;Shadows
+of the Old Booksellers,&#8221; but here too the characters were mainly
+publishers, and his account of them is indeed shadowy. The chief thing
+that I recall about any of the booksellers thus celebrated is that Tom
+Davies had &#8220;a pretty wife,&#8221; which is probably the reason why Doctor
+Johnson thought Tom would better have stuck to the stage. So far as I
+know, the most vivid pen-pictures of booksellers are those depicting the
+humble members of the craft, the curb-stone venders <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> They are much more
+picturesque than their more affluent brethren who are used to the luxury
+of a roof.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_78" id="Page_78">[Pg 78]</a></span></p>
+<div class="blockquot"><p style="color: maroon;">Rummaging over the contents of an old stall, at a half book, half old
+iron shop in Ninety-four alley, leading from Wardour street to Soho,
+yesterday, I lit upon a ragged duodecimo, which has been the strange
+delight of my infancy; the price demanded was sixpence, which the
+owner (a little squab duodecimo of a character himself) enforced with
+the assurance that his own mother should not have it for a farthing
+less. On my demurring to this extraordinary assertion, the dirty
+little vender reinforced his assertion with a sort of oath, which
+seemed more than the occasion demanded. &#8220;And now,&#8221; said he, &#8220;I have
+put my soul to it.&#8221; Pressed by so solemn an asseveration, I could no
+longer resist a demand which seemed to set me, however unworthy, upon
+a level with his nearest relations; and depositing a tester, I bore
+away the battered prize in triumph.</p>
+
+<p style="color: maroon;" class="right">&mdash;Essays of Elia.</p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_m.jpg" alt="M" /></span>onsieur Uzanne,
+who has <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> treated of the elegancies of the Fan, the Muff,
+and the Umbrella, has more recently given the world a quite unique series
+of studies among the bookstalls and the quays of Paris&mdash;&#8220;The Book Hunter
+in Paris&#8221;&mdash;and this too one finds more entertaining than any account of
+Quaritch&#8217;s or Putnam&#8217;s shop would be <img src="images/acorn_var3.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>I must bear witness to the honesty and liberality of booksellers. When one
+considers the hundreds of catalogues from which he has ordered books at a
+venture, even from across the ocean, and how seldom he has been misled or
+disappointed in the <span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_79" id="Page_79">[Pg 79]</a></span>result, one cannot subscribe to a belief in the dogma
+of total depravity. I remember some of my booksellers with positive
+affection. They were such self-denying men to consent to part with their
+treasures at any price <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> And as a rule they are far more careless than
+ordinary merchants about getting or securing their pay <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> To be sure it is
+rather ignoble for the painter of a picture, or the chiseller of a statue,
+or the vender of a fine book, to affect the acuteness of tradesmen in the
+matter of compensation. The excellent bookseller takes it for granted, if
+he stoops to think about it, that if a man orders a Caxton or a Grolier he
+will pay for it, at his convenience. It was this unthinking liberality
+which led a New York bookseller to give credit to a distinguished
+person&mdash;afterwards a candidate for the Presidency&mdash;to a considerable
+amount, and to let the account stand until it was outlawed, and his
+sensibilities were greviously shocked, when being compelled to sue for his
+due, his debtor pleaded the statute of limitations! His faith was not
+restored even when the acute buyer left a great sum of money by his will
+to found a public library, and the legacy failed through informality.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/long_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span> have only one complaint to make against booksellers. They should teach
+their clerks to recognize The Book-Worm at a glance <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> It is very
+annoying, when I go browsing around a book-shop, to have an attendant come
+up and ask me, who have bought books for thirty years, if he can &#8220;show me
+anything&#8221;&mdash;just as if I<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_80" id="Page_80">[Pg 80]</a></span> wanted to see anything in particular&mdash;or if
+&#8220;anybody is waiting on me&#8221;&mdash;when all I desire is to be let alone. Some
+booksellers, I am convinced, have this art of recognition, for they let me
+alone, and I make it a rule always to buy something of them, but never
+when their employees are so annoyingly attentive. I do not object to being
+watched; it is only the implication that I need any assistance that
+offends me. It is easy to recognize the Book-Worm at a glance by the care
+with which he handles the rare books and the indifference with which he
+passes the standard authors in holiday bindings.</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg080.jpg" alt="O" /></span>nce I had a bookseller who had a talent for drawing, which he used to
+exercise occasionally on the exterior of an express package of books. One
+of these wrappings I have preserved, exhibiting a pen-and-ink drawing of a
+war-ship firing a big gun at a few small birds. Perhaps this was
+satirically intended to denote the pains and time he had expended on so
+small a sale. But I will now immortalize him <img src="images/leaves.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>The most striking picture of a bookseller that I recall in all literature
+is one drawn by M. Uzanne, in the charming book mentioned above, which I
+will endeavor to transmute and transmit under the title of</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 4em;">THE PROPHETIC BOOK.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_l.jpg" alt="L" /></span>a Croix,&#8221; said the Emperor, &#8220;cease to beguile;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">These bookstalls must go from my bridges and quays;</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_81" id="Page_81">[Pg 81]</a></span>No longer shall tradesmen my city defile<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With mouldering hideous scarecrows like these.&#8221;</span><br />
+<br />
+While walking that night with the bibliophile,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">On the Quai Malaquais by the Rue de Saints Peres,</span><br />
+The Emperor saw, with satirical smile,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Enkindling his stove, in the chill evening air,</span><br />
+<br />
+With leaves which he tore from a tome by his side,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A bookseller ancient, with tremulous hands;</span><br />
+And laying aside his imperial pride,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;What book are you burning?&#8221; the Emperor demands.</span><br />
+<br />
+For answer Pere Foy handed over the book,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And there as the headlines saluted his glance,</span><br />
+Napoleon read, with a stupefied look,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;Account of the Conquests and Victories of France.&#8221;</span><br />
+<br />
+The dreamer imperial swallowed his ire;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Pere Foy still remained at his musty old stand,</span><br />
+Till France was environed by sword and by fire,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And Germans like locusts devoured the land.</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg081.jpg" alt="D" /></span>oubtless the occupation of bookseller is generally regarded as a very
+pleasant as well as a refined one. But there is another side, in the
+estimation of a true Book-Worm, and it is not agreeable to him to
+contemplate the life of</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_82" id="Page_82">[Pg 82]</a></span></p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 2em;">THE BOOK-SELLER.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_h.jpg" alt="H" /></span>e stands surrounded by rare tomes<br />
+Which find with him their transient homes,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He knows their fragrant covers;</span><br />
+He keeps them but a week or two,<br />
+Surrenders then their charming view<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To bibliomaniac lovers.</span><br />
+<br />
+An enviable man, you say,<br />
+To own such wares if but a day,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And handle, see and smell;</span><br />
+But all the time his spirit shrinks,<br />
+As wandering through his shop he thinks<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He only keeps to sell.</span><br />
+<br />
+The man who buys from him retains<br />
+His purchase long as life remains,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And then he doesn&#8217;t mind</span><br />
+If his unbookish eager heirs,<br />
+Administering his affairs,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Shall throw them to the wind.</span><br />
+<br />
+Or if in life he sells, in sooth,<br />
+&#8217;Tis parting with a single tooth,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A momentary pain;</span><br />
+Booksellers, like Sir Walter&#8217;s Jew,<br />
+Must this keen suffering renew,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Again and yet again.</span><br />
+<br />
+And so we need not envy him<br />
+Who sells us books, for stark and grim<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_83" id="Page_83">[Pg 83]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Remains this torture deep.</span><br />
+This Universalistic hell&mdash;<br />
+Throughout this life he&#8217;s bound to sell;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He has, but cannot keep.</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/cabbage.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_84" id="Page_84">[Pg 84]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="XII" id="XII"></a>XII.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">THE PUBLIC LIBRARIAN.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t.jpg" alt="T" /></span>here is one species of the Book-Worm which is more pitiable than the
+Bookseller, and that is the Public Librarian, especially of a circulating
+library. He is condemned to live among great collections of books and
+exhibit them to the curious public, and to be debarred from any
+proprietorship in them, even temporary. But the greater part this does not
+grieve a true Book-Worm, for he would scorn ownership of a vast majority
+of the books which he shows, but on the comparatively rare occasions when
+he is called on to produce a real book (in the sense of Bibliomania), he
+must be saddened by the reflection that it is not his own, and that the
+inspection of it is demanded of him as a matter of right <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> I have often
+observed the ill concealed reluctance with which the librarian complies
+with such a request; how he looks at the demandant with a degree of
+surprise, and then produces the key of the repository where the treasure
+is kept under guard, and heaving a sigh delivers the volume with a
+grudging hand. It was this characteristic which led me in my youth, before
+I had been inducted into the delights of Bibliomania and had learned to
+appreciate the feelings of a librarian,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_85" id="Page_85">[Pg 85]</a></span> to define him as one who
+conceives it to be his duty to prevent the public from seeing the books. I
+owe a good old librarian an apology for having said this of him, and
+hereby offer my excuses to one whose honorable name is recorded in the
+Book of Life <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> Much is to be forgiven to the man who loves books, and yet
+is doomed to deal out books that perish in the using, which no human being
+would ever read a second time nor &#8220;be found dead with.&#8221; These are the true
+tests of a good book, especially the last. Shelley died with a little
+&AElig;schylus on his person, which the cruel waves spared, and when Tennyson
+fell asleep it was with a Shakespeare, open at &#8220;Cymbeline.&#8221; One may be
+excused for reading a good deal that he never would re-read, but not for
+owning it, nor for owning a good deal which he would feel ashamed to have
+for his last earthly companion. But now for my tribute to</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: .5em;">THE PUBLIC LIBRARIAN.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_h.jpg" alt="H" /></span>is books extend on every side,<br />
+And up and down the vistas wide<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">His eye can take them in;</span><br />
+He does not love these books at all,<br />
+Their usefulness in big and small<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He counts as but a sin.</span><br />
+<br />
+And all day long he stands to serve<br />
+The public with an aching nerve;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He views them with disdain&mdash;</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_86" id="Page_86">[Pg 86]</a></span>The student with his huge round glasses,<br />
+The maiden fresh from high school classes,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With apathetic brain;</span><br />
+<br />
+The sentimental woman lorn,<br />
+The farmer recent from his corn,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The boy who thirsts for fun,</span><br />
+The graybeard with a patent-right,<br />
+The pedagogue of school at night,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The fiction-gulping one.</span><br />
+<br />
+They ask for histories, reports,<br />
+Accounts of turf and prize-ring sports,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The census of the nation;</span><br />
+Philosophy and science too,<br />
+The fresh romances not a few,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Also &#8220;Degeneration.&#8221;</span><br />
+<br />
+&#8220;They call these books!&#8221; he said, and throws<br />
+Them down in careless heaps and rows<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Before the ticket-holder;</span><br />
+He&#8217;d like to cast them at his head,<br />
+He wishes they might strike him dead,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And with the reader moulder.</span><br />
+<br />
+But now as for the shrine of saint<br />
+He seeks a spot whence sweet and faint<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A leathery smell exudes,</span><br />
+And there behind the gilded wires<br />
+For some loved rarity inquires<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Which common gaze eludes.</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_87" id="Page_87">[Pg 87]</a></span><br />
+He wishes Omar would return<br />
+That vulgar mob of books to burn,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">While he, like Virgil&#8217;s hero,</span><br />
+Would shoulder off this precious case<br />
+To some secluded private place<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With temperature at zero.</span><br />
+<br />
+And there in that Seraglio<br />
+Of books not kept for public show,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He&#8217;d feast his glowing eyes,</span><br />
+Forgetting that these beauties rare,<br />
+Morocco-clad and passing fair,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Are but the Sultan&#8217;s prize.</span><br />
+<br />
+But then a tantalizing sense<br />
+Invades expectancy intense,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And with extorted moan,</span><br />
+&#8220;Unhappy man!&#8221; he sighs, &#8220;condemned<br />
+To show such treasure and to lend&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I keep, but cannot own!&#8221;</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/flower.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_88" id="Page_88">[Pg 88]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="XIII" id="XIII"></a>XIII.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">DOES BOOK COLLECTING PAY.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_w.jpg" alt="W" /></span>e now come to the sordid but serious consideration whether books are a
+&#8220;good investment&#8221; in the financial sense <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> The mind of every true
+Book-Worm should revolt from this question, for none except a bookseller
+is pardonable for buying books with the design of selling them.
+Booksellers are a necessary evil, as purveyors for the Book-Worm <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> I
+regard them as the old woman regarded the thirty-nine articles of faith;
+when inquired of by her bishop what she thought of them, she said, &#8220;I
+don&#8217;t know as I&#8217;ve anything against them.&#8221; So I don&#8217;t know that I have
+anything against booksellers, although I must concede that they generally
+have something against me. As no well regulated man ever grudges expense
+on the house that forms his home, or on its adornment, and rarely cares or
+even reflects whether he can get his money back, so it is with the true
+bibliomaniac <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> He never intends to part with his books any more than with
+his homestead. Then again the use and enjoyment of books ought to count
+for something like interest on the capital invested. Many times, directly
+or indirectly, the use of a library is worth even more than the interest
+on the outlay. It is singular how expenditure<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_89" id="Page_89">[Pg 89]</a></span> in books is regarded as an
+extravagance by the business world. One may spend the price of a fine
+library in fast or showy horses, or in travel, or in gluttony, or in stock
+speculations eventuating on the wrong side of his ledger, and the
+money-grubbing community think none the worse of him <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> But let him expend
+annually a few thousands in books, and these sons of Mammon pull long
+faces, wag their shallow heads, and sneeringly observe, &#8220;screw loose
+somewhere,&#8221; &#8220;never get half what he has paid for them,&#8221; &#8220;too much of a
+Book-Worm to be a sharp business man.&#8221; A man who boldly bets on stocks in
+Wall Street is a gallant fellow, forsooth, and excites the admiration of
+the business community (especially of those who thrive on his losses) even
+when he &#8220;comes out at the little end of the horn.&#8221; As Ruskin observes, we
+frequently hear of a bibliomaniac, never of a horse-maniac <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> It is said
+there is a private stable in Syracuse, New York, which has cost several
+hundred thousand dollars. The owner is regarded as perfectly sane and the
+building is viewed with great pride by the public, but if the owner had
+expended as much on a private library his neighbors would have thought him
+a lunatic. If a man in business wants to excite the suspicion of the sleek
+gentlemen who sit around the discount board with him, or yell like
+lunatics at the stock exchange with him, or talk with him about the tariff
+or free silver, or any other subject on which no two men ever agree unless
+it is for their interest, let it leak out that he has put a few thousand
+dollars<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_90" id="Page_90">[Pg 90]</a></span> into a Mazarine Bible, or a Caxton, or a first folio Shakespeare
+or some other rare book <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> No matter if he can afford it, most of his
+associates regard him as they do a Bedlamite who goes about collecting
+straws. Fortunate is he if his wife does not privately call on the family
+attorney and advise with him about putting a committee over the poor man.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_b.jpg" alt="B" /></span>ut if we must regard book-buying in a money sense, and were to admit that
+books never sell for as much as they cost, it is no worse in respect to
+books than in respect to any other species of personal property. What
+chattel is there for which the buyer can get as much as he paid, even the
+next day? When it is proposed to transform the seller himself into the
+buyer of the same article, we find that the bull of yesterday is converted
+into the bear of to-day. Circumstances alter cases. I have bought a good
+many books and &#8220;objects of bigotry and virtue,&#8221; and have sold some, and
+the nearest I ever came to getting as much as I paid was in the case of a
+rare print, the seller of which, after the lapse of several years,
+solicited me to let him have it again, at exactly what I paid for it, in
+order that he might sell it to some one else at an advance. I declined his
+offer with profuse thanks, and keep the picture as a curiosity <img src="images/leaves.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>So I should say, as a rule, that books are not a good financial investment
+in the business sense, and speaking of most books and most buyers <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> Give
+a man the same experience in buying books that renders<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_91" id="Page_91">[Pg 91]</a></span> him expert in
+buying other personal property, the mere gross objects of trade, and let
+him set out with the purpose of accumulating a library that shall be a
+remunerative financial investment, and he may succeed, indeed, has often
+succeeded, certainly to the extent of getting back his outlay with
+interest, and sometimes making a handsome profit. But this needs
+experience <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> Just as one must build at least two houses before he can
+exactly suit himself, so he must collect two libraries before he can get
+one that will prove a fair investment in the vulgar sense of trade.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/long_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span> dare say that one will frequently pay more for a fine microscope or
+telescope than he can ever obtain for it if he desires or is pressed to
+sell it, but who would or should stop to think of that? The power of
+prying into the mysteries of the earth and the wonders of the heavens
+should raise one&#8217;s thoughts above such petty considerations. So it should
+be in buying that which enables one to converse with Shakespeare or Milton
+or scan the works of Raphael or Durer. When the pioneer on the western
+plains purchases an expensive rifle he does not inquire whether he can
+sell it for what it costs; his purpose is to defend his house against
+Indians and other wild beasts. So the true book-buyer buys books to fight
+weariness, disgust, sorrow and despair; to loose himself from the world
+and forget time and all its limitations and besetments. In this view they
+never cost too much. And<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_92" id="Page_92">[Pg 92]</a></span> so when asked if book-collecting pays, I retort
+by asking, does piety pay? &#8220;Honesty is the best policy&#8221; is the meanest of
+maxims. Honesty ought to be a principle and not a policy; and
+book-collecting ought to be a means of education, refinement and
+enjoyment, and not a mode of financial investment.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/flame.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_93" id="Page_93">[Pg 93]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="XIV" id="XIV"></a>XIV.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">THE BOOK-WORM&#8217;S FAULTS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t3.jpg" alt="T" /></span>his is not a case of &#8220;Snakes in Iceland,&#8221; for the Book-Worm has faults.
+One of his faults is his proneness to regard books as mere merchandise and
+not as vehicles of intellectual profit, that is to say, to be read. Too
+many collectors buy books simply for their rarity and with too little
+regard to the value of their contents <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> The Circassian slave-dealer does
+not care whether his girls can talk sense or not, and too many men buy
+books with a similar disregard to their capacity for instructing or
+entertaining. It seems to me that a man who buys books which he does not
+read, and especially such as he cannot read, merely on account of their
+value as merchandise, degrades the noble passion of bibliomania to the
+level of a trade <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> When I go through such a library I think of what
+Christ said to the traders in the Temple. Another fault is his lack of
+independence and his tendency to imitate the recognized leaders. He is too
+prone to buy certain books simply because another has them, and thus even
+rare collections are apt to fall into a tiresome routine <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> The collector
+who has a hobby and independence to ride it is admirable. Let him addict
+himself to some particular subject or era or &#8220;ana,&#8221; and try to exhaust it,
+and before he is conscious he will have accumulated a collection precious
+for its<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_94" id="Page_94">[Pg 94]</a></span> very singularity. It strikes me that the best example of this
+idea that I have ever heard of is the attempt, in which two collectors in
+this country are engaged, to acquire the first or at least one specimen of
+every one of the five hundred fifteenth century printers. If this should
+ever succeed, the great libraries of all the world would be eager for it,
+and the undertaking is sufficiently arduous to last a lifetime.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg094.jpg" alt="S" /></span>ometimes out of this fault, sometimes independently of it, arises the
+fault by which book collecting degenerates into mere rivalry&mdash;the vulgar
+desire of display and ambition for a larger or rarer or costlier
+accumulation than one&#8217;s neighbor has <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> The determination not to be
+outdone does not lend dignity or worth to the pursuit which would
+otherwise be commendable. During the late civil war in this country the
+chaplain of a regiment informed his colonel, who was not a godly person,
+that there was a hopeful revival of religion going on in a neighboring and
+rival regiment, and that forty men had been converted and baptized.
+&#8220;Dashed if I will submit to that,&#8221; said the swearing colonel: &#8220;Adjutant,
+detail fifty men for baptism instantly!&#8221; So Mr. Roe, hearing that Mr. Doe
+has acquired a Caxton or other rarity of a certain height, and absolutely
+flawless except that the corners of the last leaf have been skillfully
+mended and that six leaves are slightly foxed, cannot rest<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_95" id="Page_95">[Pg 95]</a></span> night or day
+for envy, but is like the troubled sea until he can find a copy a
+sixteenth of an inch taller, the corners of whose leaves are in their
+pristine integrity, and over whose brilliant surface the smudge of the fox
+has not been cast, and then how high is his exaltation! Not that he cares
+anything for the book intrinsically, but he glories in having beaten
+Doe <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> Now if any speaks to him of Doe&#8217;s remarkable copy, he can draw out
+his own and create a surprise in the bosom of Doe&#8217;s adherent. The laurels
+of Miltiades no longer deprive him of rest. He has overcome in this
+trivial and childish strife concerning size and condition, and he holds
+the champion&#8217;s belt for the present. He not only feels big himself but he
+has succeeded in making Doe feel small, which is still better. I don&#8217;t
+know whether there will be any book-collecting in Mr. Bellamy&#8217;s Utopia,
+but if there is, it will not be disfigured by such meanness, but
+collectors will go about striving to induce others to accept their
+superior copies and everything will be as lovely as in Heine&#8217;s heaven,
+where geese fly around ready cooked, and if one treads on your corn it
+conveys a sensation of exquisite delight.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>t has been several times remarked by moralists that human nature is
+selfish. One of course does not expect another to relinquish to him his
+place in a &#8220;queue&#8221; at a box-office or his turn at a barber&#8217;s shop, but in
+the noble and elegant pursuit of book-collecting it would be well to
+emulate the politeness of the French at<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_96" id="Page_96">[Pg 96]</a></span> Fontenoy, and hat in hand offer
+our antagonist the first shot <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> But I believe the only place where the
+Book-Worm ever does that is the auction room.</p>
+
+<div class="blockquot"><p style="color: maroon;">I no sooner come into the library, but I bolt the door to me,
+excluding lust, ambition, avarice, and all such vices, whose nurse is
+idleness, the mother of ignorance, and melancholy herself, and in the
+very lap of eternity, among so many divine souls, I take my seat with
+so lofty a spirit and sweet content, that I pity all our great ones
+and rich men that know not this happiness.</p>
+
+<p style="color: maroon;" class="right">&mdash;Heinsius.</p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t2.jpg" alt="T" /></span>he modern Book-Worm is not the simple and absent-minded creature who went
+by this name a century ago or more. He is no mere antiquarian, Dryasdust
+or Dominie Sampson, but he is a sharp merchant, or a relentless broker, or
+a professional railroad wrecker, or a keen lawyer, or a busy physician, or
+a great manufacturer&mdash;a wide awake man of affairs, quite devoid of the
+conventional innocency and credulity which formerly made the name of
+Book-Worm suggestive of a necessity for a guardian or a committee in
+lunacy <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> No longer does he inquire, as Becatello inquired of Alphonso,
+King of Naples, which had done the better&mdash;Poggius, who sold a Livy,
+fairly writ in his own hand, to buy a country home near Florence, or he,
+who to buy a Livy had sold a piece of land? No longer is the scale turned
+in the negotiation of a treaty between princes by the weight of a rare
+book, as when Cosimo dei Medici persuaded King Alphonso<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_97" id="Page_97">[Pg 97]</a></span> of Naples to a
+peace by sending him a codex of Livy. No longer does the Book-Worm sit in
+his modest book-room, absorbed in his adored volumes, heedless of the
+waning lamp and the setting star, of hunger and thirst, unmindful of the
+scent of the clover wafted in at the window, deaf to the hum of the bees
+and the low of the kine, blind to the glow of sunsets and the soft contour
+of the blue hills, and the billowy swaying of the wheat field before the
+gentle breath of the south <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> No longer can it be said that</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: -3em;">THE BOOK-WORM DOES NOT CARE FOR NATURE.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span> feel no need of nature&#8217;s flowers&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of flowers of rhetoric I have store;</span><br />
+I do not miss the balmy showers&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When books are dry I o&#8217;er them pore.</span><br />
+<br />
+Why should I sit upon a stile<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And cause my aged bones to ache,</span><br />
+When I can all the hours beguile<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With any style that I would take?</span><br />
+<br />
+Why should I haunt a purling stream,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Or fish in miasmatic brook?</span><br />
+O&#8217;er Euclid&#8217;s angles I can dream,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And recreation find in Hook.</span><br />
+<br />
+Why should I jolt upon a horse<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And after wretched vermin roam,</span><br />
+When I can choose an easier course<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With Fox and Hare and Hunt at home?</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_98" id="Page_98">[Pg 98]</a></span><br />
+Why should I scratch my precious skin<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By crawling through a hawthorne hedge,</span><br />
+When Hawthorne, raking up my sin,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Stands tempting on the nearest ledge?</span><br />
+<br />
+No need that I should take the trouble<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To go abroad to walk or ride,</span><br />
+For I can sit at home and double<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Quite up with pain from Akenside.</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t2.jpg" alt="T" /></span>he modern Book-Worm deals in sums of six figures; he keeps an agent &#8220;on
+the other side;&#8221; he cables his demands and his decisions; his name
+flutters the dovecotes in the auction-room; to him is proffered the first
+chance at a rarity worth a King&#8217;s ransom; too busy to potter in person
+with such a trifle as the purchase of a Mazarine Bible, he hires others to
+do the hunting and he merely receives the game; the tiger skin and the
+elephant&#8217;s tusk are laid at his feet to order, but he misses all the joy
+and ardor of the hunt. How different is all this from Sir Thomas
+Urquhart&#8217;s account of his own library, of which he says: &#8220;There were not
+three works therein which were not of mine own purchase, and all of them
+together, in the order wherein I had ranked them, compiled like to a
+complete nosegay of flowers, which in my travels I had gathered out of the
+gardens of sixteen several kingdoms.&#8221; <img src="images/acorn_var2.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>Another fault of the Book-Worm is the affectation<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_99" id="Page_99">[Pg 99]</a></span> of collecting books on
+subjects in which he takes no practical interest, simply because it is the
+fashion or the books are intrinsically beautiful. Many a man has a fine
+collection on Angling, for example, who hardly knows how to put a worm on
+a hook, much less attach a fly <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> I fear I am one of these hypocritical
+creatures, for this is</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 1em;">HOW I GO A-FISHING.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_t.jpg" alt="T" /></span>is sweet to sit in shady nook,<br />
+Or wade in rapid crystal brook,<br />
+Impervious in rubber boots,<br />
+And wary of the slippery roots,<br />
+To snare the swift evasive trout<br />
+Or eke the sauntering horn-pout;<br />
+Or in the cold Canadian river<br />
+To see the glorious salmon quiver,<br />
+And them with tempting hook inveigle,<br />
+Fit viand for a table regal;<br />
+Or after an exciting bout<br />
+To snatch the pike with sharpened snout;<br />
+Or with some patient ass to row<br />
+To troll for bass with motion slow.<br />
+Oh! joy supreme when they appear<br />
+Splashing above the water clear,<br />
+And drawn reluctantly to land<br />
+Lie gasping on the yellow sand!<br />
+But sweeter far to read the books<br />
+That treat of flies and worms and hooks,<br />
+From Pickering&#8217;s monumental page,<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_100" id="Page_100">[Pg 100]</a></span>(Late rivalled by the rare Dean Sage),<br />
+And Major&#8217;s elder issues neat,<br />
+To Burnand&#8217;s funny &#8220;Incompleat.&#8221;<br />
+I love their figures quaint and queer,<br />
+Which on the inviting page appear,<br />
+From those of good Dame Juliana,<br />
+Who lifts a fish and cries hosanna,<br />
+To those of Stothard, graceful Quaker,<br />
+Of fishy art supremest maker,<br />
+Whose fisherman, so dry and neat,<br />
+Would never soil a parlor seat.<br />
+I love them all, the books on angling,<br />
+And far from cares and business jangling,<br />
+Ensconced in cosy chimney-corner,<br />
+Like the traditional Jack Horner,<br />
+I read from Walton down to Lang,<br />
+And hum that song the Milkmaid sang.<br />
+I get not tired nor wet nor cross,<br />
+Nor suffer monetary loss&mdash;<br />
+If fish are shy and will not bite,<br />
+And shun the snare laid in their sight&mdash;<br />
+In order home at night to bring<br />
+A fraudulent, deceitful string,<br />
+And thus escape the merry jeers<br />
+Of heartless piscatory peers;<br />
+Nor have to listen to the lying<br />
+Of fishermen while fish are frying,<br />
+Who boast of draughts miraculous<br />
+Which prove too large a draught on us.<br />
+I spare the rod, and rods don&#8217;t break;<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_101" id="Page_101">[Pg 101]</a></span>Nor fish in sight the hook forsake;<br />
+My lines ne&#8217;er snap like corset laces;<br />
+My lines are fallen in pleasant places.<br />
+And so in sage experience ripe,<br />
+My fishery is but a type.</p></div>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/wreath.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_102" id="Page_102">[Pg 102]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="XV" id="XV"></a>XV.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">POVERTY AS A MEANS OF ENJOYMENT IN COLLECTING.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_p.jpg" alt="P" /></span>oor collectors are not only not at a disadvantage in enjoyment, but they
+have a positive advantage over affluent rivals. If I were rich, probably I
+should not throw my money away just to experience this superiority, but it
+nevertheless exists. I do not envy, but I commiserate my brother collector
+who has plenty of money. He who only has to draw his check to obtain his
+desire fails to reach the keenest bliss of the pursuit. If diamonds were
+as common as cobble stones there would be no delight in picking them up <img src="images/acorn_var2.jpg" alt="" /></p>
+
+<p>To constitute a bibliomaniac in the true sense, the love of books must
+combine with a certain limitation of means for the gratification of the
+appetite <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> The consciousness of some extravagance must be always present
+in his mind; there must be a sense of sacrifice in the attainment; in a
+rich man the disease cannot exist; he cannot enter the kingdom of the
+Bibliomaniac&#8217;s heaven. There is the same difference of sensation between
+the acquirement of books by a wealthy man and by him of slender purse,
+that there is between the taking of fish in a net and the successful
+result of a long angling pursuit after one especially fat and evasive
+trout. When a prince kills<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[Pg 103]</a></span> his preserved game, with keepers to raise it
+for him and to hand him guns ready loaded, so that all he has to do is to
+squint and pull the trigger, this is not hunting; it is mere vulgar
+butchery <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> What knows he of the joys of the tramper in the forest, who
+stalks the deer, or scares up smaller game, singly, and has to work hard
+for his bag? We read in Dibdin&#8217;s sumptuous pages of the celebrated contest
+between the Duke of Devonshire and the Marquis of Blandford for the
+possession of the Valdarfar Decameron; we read with admiration, but we
+also read of the immortal battle of Elia with the little squab-keeper of
+the old book-stall in Ninety-four alley, over the ownership of a ragged
+duodecimo for a sixpence; we read with affection <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> So we read Leigh
+Hunt&#8217;s confession that when he &#8220;cut open a new catalogue of old books, and
+put crosses against dozens of volumes in the list, out of the pure
+imagination of buying them, the possibility being out of the question.&#8221; <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" />
+Poverty hath her victories no less renowned than wealth. To haunt the
+book-stores, there to see a long-desired work in luxurious and tempting
+style, reluctantly to abandon it for the present on account of the price;
+to go home and dream about it, to wonder, for a year, and perchance
+longer, whether it will ever again greet your eyes; to conjecture what act
+of desperation you might in heat of passion commit toward some more
+affluent man in whose possession you should thereafter find it; to see it
+turn up again in another book-shop, its charms slightly faded, but<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[Pg 104]</a></span> yet
+mellowed by age, like those of your first love, met in later life&mdash;with
+this difference, however, that whereas you crave those of the book more
+than ever, you are generally quite satisfied with yourself for not having,
+through the greenness of youth, yielded untimely to those of the lady; to
+ask with assumed indifference the price, and learn with ill-dissembled joy
+that it is now within your means; to say you&#8217;ll take it; to place it
+beneath your arm, and pay for it (or more generally order it &#8220;charged&#8221;);
+to go forth from that room with feelings akin to those of Ulysses when he
+brought away the Palladium from Troy; to keep a watchful eye on the parcel
+in the railway coach on your way home, or to gloat over the treasures of
+its pages, and wonder if the other passengers have any suspicion of your
+good fortune; and finally to place the volume on your shelf, and
+thenceforth to call it your own&mdash;this is indeed a pleasure denied to the
+affluent, so keen as to be akin to pain, and only marred by the palling
+which always follows possession and the presentation of your book-seller&#8217;s
+account three months afterwards.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/leaves_jag.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[Pg 105]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="XVI" id="XVI"></a>XVI.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">THE ARRANGEMENT OF BOOKS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg105.jpg" alt="T" /></span>here was a time when I loved to see my books arranged with a view to
+uniformity of height and harmony of color without respect to subjects.
+That time I regard as my vealy period <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> That was the time when we admired
+&#8220;Somnambula,&#8221; and when the housewife used to have all the pictures hung on
+the same level, and to buy vases in pairs exactly alike and put them on
+either side of the parlor clock, which was generally surmounted by a
+prancing Saracen or a weaving Penelope. Granting that a collection is not
+extensive enough to demand a strict arrangement by subjects, I like to see
+a little artistic confusion&mdash;high and low together here and there, like a
+democratic community; now and then some giants laid down on their sides to
+rest; the shelves not uniformly filled out as if the owner never expected
+to buy any more, and alongside a dainty Angler a book in red or blue cloth
+with a white label&mdash;just as childred in velvet and furs sit next a
+newsboy, or a little girl in calico with a pigtail at Sunday School, or as
+beggars and princes kneel side by side on the cathedral pavement.  It is
+good to have these &#8220;swell&#8221; books rub up against the commoners, which
+though not so elegant are frequently a great deal brighter. At a country<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[Pg 106]</a></span>
+funeral I once heard the undertaker say to the bearers, &#8220;size yourselves
+off.&#8221; There is no necessity or artistic gain in such a ceremony in a
+library, and a departure from stiff uniformity is quite agreeable <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> Then
+I do not care to have the book cases all of the same height, nor even of
+the same kind of wood, nor to have them all &#8220;dwarfs,&#8221; with bric-a-brac on
+the top. I would rather have more books on top <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> In short, it is pleasant
+to have the collection remind one in a way of Topsy&mdash;not that it was
+&#8220;born,&#8221; but &#8220;growed&#8221; and is expected to grow more <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> There is a modern
+notion of considering a library as a room rather than as a collection of
+books, and of making the front drawing-room the library, which is
+heretical in the eyes of a true Book-Worm. <span class="figright"><img src="images/img_pg106.jpg" alt="" /></span> This is probably an invention
+of the women of the house to prevent any additions to the books without
+their knowledge, and to discourage book-buying. We have surrendered too
+much to our wives in this; they demand book cases as furniture and to
+serve as shelves, without any regard to the interior contents or whether
+there are any, except for the color of the bindings and the regularity of
+the rows. All of us have thus seen &#8220;libraries&#8221; without books worthy the
+name, and book-cases sometimes with exquisite silk curtains, carefully and
+closely drawn, arousing the suspicion that there were no<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[Pg 107]</a></span> books behind
+them <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> My ideal library is a room given up to books, all by itself, at
+the top or in the rear of the house, where &#8220;company&#8221; cannot break through
+and say to me, &#8220;I know you are a great man to buy books&mdash;have you seen
+that beautiful limited holiday edition of Ben Hur, with illustrations?&#8221;</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/flower.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_108" id="Page_108">[Pg 108]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="XVII" id="XVII"></a>XVII.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">ENEMIES OF BOOKS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_m.jpg" alt="M" /></span>r. Blades regards as &#8220;Enemies of Books&#8221; fire, water, gas, heat, dust and
+neglect, ignorance and bigotry, the worm, beetles, bugs and rats,
+book-binders, collectors, servants and children <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> He does not include
+women, borrowers, or thieves. Perhaps he considers them rather as enemies
+of the book-owners <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> The worm is not always to be considered an enemy to
+authors, although he may be to books. James Payn, in speaking of the
+recent discovery, in the British Museum, of a copy on papyrus of the
+humorous poems of the obscure Greek poet, Herodles, says: &#8220;The humorous
+poems of Herodles possess, however, the immense advantage of being
+&#8216;seriously mutilated by worms&#8217;; wherever therefore an hiatus occurs, the
+charitable and cultured mind will be enabled to conclude that (as in the
+case of a second descent upon a ball supper) the &#8216;best things&#8217; have been
+already devoured.&#8221; It was doubtless to guard against thieves that the
+ancient books were chained up in the monasteries, but the practice was
+effectual also against borrowers. De Bury, in his &#8220;Philobiblon&#8221; has a
+chapter entitled &#8220;A Provident Arrangement by which his Books may be lent
+to Strangers,&#8221; in which the utmost leniency is to lend duplicate books
+upon ample security. Not to adopt the harsh judgment<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_109" id="Page_109">[Pg 109]</a></span> of an ancient
+author, who says, &#8220;to lend a book is to lose it, and borrowing but a
+hypocritical pretense for stealing,&#8221; we may conclude, in a word, that to
+lend a book is like the Presidency of the United States, to be neither
+desired nor refused. Collectors are not so much exposed to the ravages of
+thieves as book-sellers are, and a book-thief ought to be regarded with
+leniency for his good taste and his reliance on the existence of culture
+in others. After all, it is one&#8217;s own fault if he lends a book <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> One
+should as soon think of lending one of his children, unless he has
+duplicate or triplicate daughters. It would be difficult to foretell what
+would happen to a man who should propose to borrow a rare book. Perhaps
+death by freezing would be the safest prediction. Although Grolier stamped
+&#8220;et amicorum&#8221; on his books, that did not mean that he would lend them, but
+only that his friends were free of them at his house. It is amusing to
+note, in Mr. Castle&#8217;s monograph on Book-Plates, how many of them indicate
+a stern purpose not to lend books. Mr. Gosse regards book-plates as a
+precaution not only against thieves, but against borrowers. He observes of
+the man who does not adopt a book-plate: &#8220;Such a man is liable to great
+temptations. He is brought face to face with that enemy of his species,
+the borrower, and does not speak with him in the gate. If he had a
+book-plate he would say, &#8216;Oh! certainly I will lend you this volume, if it
+has not my book-plate in it; of course one makes it a rule never to lend
+a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_110" id="Page_110">[Pg 110]</a></span> book that has.&#8217; He would say this and feign to look inside the volume,
+knowing right well that this safeguard against the borrower is there
+already.&#8221; One may make a gift of a book to a friend, but there is as much
+difference between giving a book and lending one as there is between
+indorsing a note and giving the money. I have considerable respect for and
+sympathy with a good honest book-thief. He holds out no false hopes and
+makes no false pretences. But the borrower who does not return adds
+hypocrisy and false pretences to other crime. He ought to be committed to
+the State prison for life, and put at keeping the books of the
+institution. In a buried temple in Cnidos, in 1857, Mr. Newton found rolls
+of lead hung up, on which were inscribed spells devoting enemies to the
+infernal gods for sundry specified offenses, among which was the failure
+to return a borrowed garment <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> On which Agnes Repplier says: &#8220;Would that
+it were given to me now to inscribe, and by inscribing doom, all those who
+have borrowed and failed to return our books; would that by scribbling
+some strong language on a piece of lead we could avenge the lamentable
+gaps on our shelves, and send the ghosts of the wrong-doers howling
+dismally into the eternal shades of Tartarus.&#8221;</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span> have spoken of a certain amount of sympathy as due from a magnanimous
+book-owner toward a pilferer of such wares. This is always on the
+condition that he steals to add to his own hoard and not for mere
+pecuniary<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_111" id="Page_111">[Pg 111]</a></span> gain. The following is suggested as a Christian mode of dealing
+with</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 1.5em;">THE BOOK-THIEF.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_a.jpg" alt="A" /></span>h, gentle thief!<br />
+I marked the absent-minded air<br />
+With which you tucked away my rare<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Book in your pocket.</span><br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8217;Twas past belief&mdash;</span><br />
+I saw you near the open case,<br />
+But yours was such an honest face<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I did not lock it.</span><br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I knew you lacked</span><br />
+That one to make your set complete,<br />
+And when that book you chanced to meet<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">You recognized it.</span><br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And when attacked</span><br />
+By rage of bibliophilic greed,<br />
+You prigged that small Quantin Ovide,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Although I prized it.</span><br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I will not sue,</span><br />
+Nor bring your family to shame<br />
+By giving up your honored name<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To heartless prattle.</span><br />
+<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I&#8217;ll visit you,</span><br />
+And under your unwary eyes<br />
+Secrete and carry off the prize,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">My ravished chattel.</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_112" id="Page_112">[Pg 112]</a></span><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/long_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>t greatly rejoices me to observe that Mr. Blades does not include tobacco
+among the enemies of books. In one sense tobacco may be ranked as a
+book-enemy, for self-denial in this regard may furnish a man with a good
+library in a few years. I have known a very pretty collection made out of
+the ordinary smoke-offerings of twenty years. Undoubtedly there are
+libraries so fine that smoking in them would be discountenanced, but mine
+is not impervious to the pipe or cigar, and I entertain the pleasing fancy
+that tobacco-smoke is good for books, disinfects them, and keeps them free
+from the destroying worm. As I do not myself smoke, I like to see my
+friends taking their ease in my book-room, with the &#8220;smoke of their
+torment ascending&#8221; above my modest volumes. I know how they feel, without
+incurring the expense, and so to them I indite and dedicate</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p>THE SMOKE TRAVELLER.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_w.jpg" alt="W" /></span>hen I puff my cigarette,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Straight I see a Spanish girl,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Mantilla, fan, coquettish curl,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Languid airs and dimpled face,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Calculating fatal grace;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Hear a twittering serenade</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Under lofty balcony played;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Queen at bull-fight, naught she cares</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">What her agile lover dares;</span><br />
+She can love and quick forget.<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_113" id="Page_113">[Pg 113]</a></span><br />
+Let me but my meerschaum light,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I behold a bearded man,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Built upon capacious plan,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Sabre-slashed in war or duel,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Gruff of aspect but not cruel,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Metaphysically muddled,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With strong beer a little fuddled,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Slow in love and deep in books,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">More sentimental than he looks,</span><br />
+Swears new friendships every night.<br />
+<br />
+Let me my chibouk enkindle,&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">In a tent I&#8217;m quick set down</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With a Bedouin lean and brown,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Plotting gain of merchandise,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Or perchance of robber prize;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Clumsy camel load upheaving,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Woman deftly carpet weaving;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Meal of dates and bread and salt,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">While in azure heavenly vault</span><br />
+Throbbing stars begin to dwindle.<br />
+<br />
+Glowing coal in clay dudheen<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Carries me to sweet Killarney,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Full of hypocritic blarney;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Huts with babies, pigs and hens</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Mixed together; bogs and fens;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Shillalahs, praties, usquebaugh,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Tenants defying hated law,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Fair blue eyes with lashes black,</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_114" id="Page_114">[Pg 114]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 2em;">Eyes black and blue from cudgel-thwack,&mdash;</span><br />
+So fair, so foul, is Erin green.<br />
+<br />
+My nargileh once inflamed,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Quick appears a Turk with turban,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Girt with guards in palace urban,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Or in house by summer sea</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Slave-girls dancing languidly;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Bow-string, sack and bastinado,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Black boats darting in the shadow;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Let things happen as they please,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Whether well or ill at ease,</span><br />
+Fate alone is blessed or blamed.<br />
+<br />
+With my ancient calumet<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I can raise a wigwam&#8217;s smoke,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And the copper tribe invoke,&mdash;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Scalps and wampum, bows and knives,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Slender maidens, greasy wives,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Papoose hanging on a tree,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Chieftains squatting silently,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Feathers, beads and hideous paint,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Medicine-man and wooden saint,&mdash;</span><br />
+Forest-framed the vision set.<br />
+<br />
+My cigar breeds many forms&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Planter of the rich Havana,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Mopping brow with sheer bandanna;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Russian prince in fur arrayed;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Paris fop on dress parade;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">London swell just after dinner;</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_115" id="Page_115">[Pg 115]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 2em;">Wall Street broker&mdash;gambling sinner;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Delver in Nevada mine;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Scotch laird bawling &#8220;Auld Lang Syne;&#8221;</span><br />
+Thus Raleigh&#8217;s weed my fancy warms.<br />
+<br />
+Life&#8217;s review in smoke goes past.<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Fickle fortune, stubborn fate,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Right discovered all too late,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Beings loved and gone before,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Beings loved but friends no more,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Self-reproach and futile sighs,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Vanity in birth that dies,</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Longing, heart-break, adoration,&mdash;</span><br />
+<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Nothing sure in expectation</span><br />
+Save ash-receiver at the last.</p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/long_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>n the early history of New England, when the town of Deerfield was burned
+by the Indians, Captain Dunstan, who was the father of a large family,
+deeming discretion the better part of valor, made up his mind to run for
+it and to take one child (as a sample, probably), that being all he could
+safely carry on his horse <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> But on looking about him, he could not
+determine which child to take, and so observing to his wife, &#8220;All or
+none,&#8221; he set her and the baby on the horse, and brought up the rear on
+foot with his gun, and fended off the redskins and brought the whole
+family into safety. Such is the tale, and in the old primer there was a
+picture of the scene&mdash;although I do not<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_116" id="Page_116">[Pg 116]</a></span> understand that it was taken from
+the life, and the story reflects small credit on the character of the
+aborigines for enterprise.</p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span> have often conjectured which of my books I would save in case of fire in
+my library, and whether I should care to rescue any if I could not bring
+off all. Perhaps the problem would work itself out as follows:</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 3em;">THE FIRE IN THE LIBRARY.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_t.jpg" alt="T" /></span>was just before midnight a smart conflagration<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Broke out in my dwelling and threatened my books;</span><br />
+Confounded and dazed with a great consternation<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I gazed at my treasures with pitiful looks.</span><br />
+<br />
+&#8220;Oh! which shall I rescue?&#8221; I cried in deep feeling;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I wished I were armed like Briareus of yore,</span><br />
+While sharper and sharper the flames kept revealing<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The sight of my bibliographical store.</span><br />
+<br />
+&#8220;My Lamb may remain to be thoroughly roasted,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">My Crabbe to be broiled and my Bacon to fry,</span><br />
+My Browning accustomed to being well toasted,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And Waterman Taylor rejoicing to dry.&#8221;</span><br />
+<br />
+At hazard I grasped at the rest of my treasure,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And crammed all pockets with dainty eighteens;</span><br />
+I packed up a pillow case, heaping good measure,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And turned me away from the saddest of scenes.</span><br />
+<br />
+But slowly departing, my face growing sadder,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">At leaving old favorites behind me so far,</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_117" id="Page_117">[Pg 117]</a></span>A feminine voice from the foot of the ladder<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Cried, &#8220;Bring down my Cook-Book and Harper&#8217;s Bazar!&#8221;</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span>t has been hereinbefore intimated that women may be classed among the
+enemies of books. There is at least one time of the year when every
+Book-Worm thinks so, and that is the dread period of
+house-cleaning&mdash;sometimes in the spring, sometimes in the autumn, and
+sometimes, in the case of excessively finical housewives, in both <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> That
+is the time looked forward to by him with apprehension and looked back
+upon with horror, because the poor fellow knows what comes of</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 2em;">CLEANING THE LIBRARY.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_w.jpg" alt="W" /></span>ith traitorous kiss remarked my spouse,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;Remain down town to lunch to-day,</span><br />
+For we are busy cleaning house,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And you would be in Minnie&#8217;s way.&#8221;</span><br />
+<br />
+When I came home that fateful night,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I found within my sacred room</span><br />
+The wretched maid had wreaked her spite<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With mop and pail and witch&#8217;s broom.</span><br />
+<br />
+The books were there, but oh how changed!<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They startled me with rare surprises,</span><br />
+For they had all been rearranged,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And less by subjects than by sizes.</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_118" id="Page_118">[Pg 118]</a></span><br />
+Some volumes numbered right to left,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And some were standing on their heads,</span><br />
+And some were of their mates bereft,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And some behind for refuge fled.</span><br />
+<br />
+The women brave attempts had made<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">At placing cognate books together;&mdash;</span><br />
+They looked like strangers close arrayed<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Under a porch in stormy weather.</span><br />
+<br />
+She watched my face&mdash;that spouse of mine&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Some approbation there to glean,</span><br />
+But seeing I did not incline<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To praise, remarked, &#8220;I&#8217;ve got it clean.&#8221;</span><br />
+<br />
+And so she had&mdash;and also wrong;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">She little knew&mdash;she was but thirty&mdash;</span><br />
+I entertained a preference strong<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To have it right, though ne&#8217;er so dirty.</span><br />
+<br />
+That wife of mine has much good sense,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To chide her would have been inhuman,</span><br />
+And it would be a great expense<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To graft the book-sense on a woman.</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_s.jpg" alt="S" /></span>uch are my reflections when I consider a fire in my own little library.
+But when I regard the great and growing mass of books with which the earth
+groans, and reflect how few of them are necessary or original, and how
+little the greater part of them would be missed, I sometimes am led to
+believe that a general conflagration of them might in the long run be a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_119" id="Page_119">[Pg 119]</a></span>
+blessing to mankind, by the stimulation of thought and the deliverance of
+authors from the influence of tradition and the habit of imitation. When I
+am in this mood I incline to think that much is</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 3em;">ODE TO OMAR.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_o.jpg" alt="O" /></span>mar, who burned (or did not burn)<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The Alexandrian tomes,</span><br />
+I would erect to thee an urn<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Beneath Sophia&#8217;s domes.</span><br />
+<br />
+So many books I can&#8217;t endure&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The dull and commonplace,</span><br />
+The dirty, trifling and obscure,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The realistic race.</span><br />
+<br />
+Would that thy exemplary torch<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Could bravely blaze again,</span><br />
+And many manufactories scorch<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of book-inditing men.</span><br />
+<br />
+The poets who write &#8220;dialect,&#8221;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Maudlin and coarse by turns,</span><br />
+Most ardently do I expect<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Thou&#8217;lt wither up with Burns.</span><br />
+<br />
+All the erratic, yawping class<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Condemn with judgment stern,</span><br />
+Walt Whitman&#8217;s awful &#8220;Leaves of Grass&#8221;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With elegant Swinburne.</span><br />
+<br />
+Of commentators make a point,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The carping, blind, and dry;</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_120" id="Page_120">[Pg 120]</a></span>Rend the &#8220;Baconians&#8221; joint by joint,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And throw them on to fry.</span><br />
+<br />
+Especially I&#8217;d have thee choke<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Law libraries in sheep</span><br />
+With fire derived from ancient Coke,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And sink in ashes deep.</span><br />
+<br />
+Destroy the sheep&mdash;don&#8217;t save my own&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I weary of the cram,</span><br />
+The misplaced diligence I&#8217;ve shown&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But kindly spare my Lamb.</span><br />
+<br />
+Fear not to sprinkle on the pyre<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The woes of &#8220;Esther Waters&#8221;;</span><br />
+They&#8217;ll only make the flame soar higher,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And warn Eve&#8217;s other daughters.</span><br />
+<br />
+But &#8217;ware of Howells and of James,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of Trollope and his rout;</span><br />
+They&#8217;d dampen down the fiercest flames<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And put your fire out.</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/wreath.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_121" id="Page_121">[Pg 121]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="XVIII" id="XVIII"></a>XVIII.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">LIBRARY COMPANIONS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_a2.jpg" alt="A" /></span>s a rule I do not care for any constant human companion in my library,
+but I do not object to a cat or a small dog <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> That picture of Montaigne,
+drawn by himself, amusing his cat with a garter, or that other one of
+Doctor Johnson feeding oysters to his cat Hodge, is a very pleasing one.
+In my library hangs Durer&#8217;s picture of St. Jerome in his cell, busy with
+his writing, and a dog and a lion quietly dozing together in the
+foreground. As I am no saint I have never been able to keep a lion in my
+library for any great length of time, but I have maintained a dog there <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" />
+Lamb even contended that his books were the better for being dog&#8217;s-eared,
+but I do not go so far as that. Nor do I pretend that his presence will
+prevent the books from becoming foxed. Here is a portrait of</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 3em;">MY DOG.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_h.jpg" alt="H" /></span>e is a trifling, homely beast,<br />
+Of no use, or the very least;<br />
+To shake imaginary rat<br />
+Or bark for hours at china cat;<br />
+To lie at head of stairs and start,<br />
+Like animated, woolly dart,<br />
+Upon a non-existent foe;<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_122" id="Page_122">[Pg 122]</a></span>Or on hind legs like monkey go,<br />
+To beg for sugar or for bone;<br />
+Never content to be alone;<br />
+To bask for hours in the sun.<br />
+Rolled up till head and tail are one;<br />
+Usurping all the softest places<br />
+And keeping them with doggish graces;<br />
+To sneak between the housemaid&#8217;s feet<br />
+And scour unnoticed on the street;<br />
+Wag indefatigable tail;<br />
+Cajole with piteous human wail;<br />
+To dance with dainty dandy air<br />
+When nicely parted is his hair,<br />
+And look most ancient and dejected<br />
+When it has been too long neglected;<br />
+To sleep upon my book-den rug<br />
+And dream of battle with a pug;<br />
+To growl with counterfeited rabies;<br />
+To be more trouble than twin babies;&mdash;<br />
+These are the qualities and tricks<br />
+That in my heart his image fix;<br />
+And so in cursory, doggerel rhyme<br />
+I celebrate him in his time,<br />
+Nor wait his virtues to rehearse<br />
+In cold obituary verse.</p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t2.jpg" alt="T" /></span>here is one other speaking companion that I would tolerate in my library,
+and that is a clock. I have a number of clocks in mine, and if it were not
+for their unanimous<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_123" id="Page_123">[Pg 123]</a></span> and warning voice I might forget to go to bed.
+Perhaps my reader would like to hear an account of</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 3em;">MY CLOCKS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_f.jpg" alt="F" /></span>ive clocks adorn my domicile<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And give me occupation,</span><br />
+For moments else inane I fill<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With their due regulation.</span><br />
+<br />
+Four of these clocks, on each Lord&#8217;s Day,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As regular as preaching,</span><br />
+I wind and set, so that they may<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The flight of time be teaching.</span><br />
+<br />
+My grandfather&#8217;s old clock is chief,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With foolish moon-faced dial;</span><br />
+Procrastination is a thief<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It always brings to trial.</span><br />
+<br />
+Its height is as the tallest men,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Its pendulum beats slow,</span><br />
+And when its awful bell booms ten,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Young men get up and go.</span><br />
+<br />
+Another clock is bronze and gilt,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Penelope sits on it,</span><br />
+And in her fingers holds a quilt&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">How strange &#8217;tis not a bonnet!</span><br />
+<br />
+Memorial of those weary years<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When she the web unravelled,</span><br />
+While Ithacus choked down his fears<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And slow from Ilium travelled.</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_124" id="Page_124">[Pg 124]</a></span><br />
+Ceres upon the third, with spray<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of grain, in classic gown,</span><br />
+Seems sadly to recall the day<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Proserpine sank down,</span><br />
+<br />
+With scarcely time to say good-bye,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Unto the world of Dis;</span><br />
+And keeps account, with many a sigh,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of harvest time in this.</span><br />
+<br />
+Another clock is rococo,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of Louis Sept or Seize,</span><br />
+With many a dreadful furbelow<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">An artist&#8217;s hair to raise,</span><br />
+<br />
+Suggestions of a giddy court,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With fan and boufflant bustle,</span><br />
+When silken trains made gallant sport<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And o&#8217;er the floor did rustle.</span><br />
+<br />
+The fourth was brought, in foolish trust<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">From Alpland far away,</span><br />
+A baby clock, and so it must<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Be tended every day.</span><br />
+<br />
+Importunate and trivial thing!<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Thou katydid of clocks!</span><br />
+Defying all my skill to bring<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Right time from out thy box.</span><br />
+<br />
+With works of wood and face of brass<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">On which queer cherubs play,</span><br />
+The tedious hours thou well dost pass,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And none thy chirp gainsay.</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_125" id="Page_125">[Pg 125]</a></span><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg125.jpg" alt="A" /></span>mong the silent companions in my study are the effigies of the four
+greatest geniuses of modern times in the realms of literature, art, music
+and war&mdash;a print of Shakespeare; one of Michael Angelo&#8217;s corrugated face
+with its broken nose; a bust of Beethoven, resembling a pouting lion; and
+a print of Napoleon at St. Helena, representing him dressed in a white
+duck suit, with a broad-brimmed straw hat, and sitting looking seaward,
+with those unfathomable eyes, a newspaper lying in his lap <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> Unhappy
+faces all except the first&mdash;his cheerful, probably because he has effected
+an arrangement with an otherwise idle person, named Bacon, to do all his
+work for him. But there is another portrait, at which I look oftener, the
+original of which probably takes more interest in me, but is unknown to
+every visitor to my study. I myself have not seen her in half a century <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" />
+I call it simply</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 4em;">A PORTRAIT.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_a.jpg" alt="A" /></span> gentle face is ever in my room,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With features fine and melancholy eyes,</span><br />
+Though young, a little past life&#8217;s freshest bloom,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And always with air of sad surmise.</span><br />
+<br />
+A great white cap almost conceals her hair,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A collar broad falls o&#8217;er her shoulders slender;</span><br />
+The fashion of a bygone age an air<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of quaintness to her simple garb doth render.</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_126" id="Page_126">[Pg 126]</a></span><br />
+Those hazel eyes pursue me as I move<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And seem to watch my busy toiling pen;</span><br />
+They hold me with an anxious yearning love,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As if she dwelt upon the earth again.</span><br />
+<br />
+My mother&#8217;s portrait! fifty years ago,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When I was but a heedless happy boy,</span><br />
+The influence of her being ceased to flow,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And she laid down life&#8217;s burden and its joy.</span><br />
+<br />
+And now as I sit pondering o&#8217;er my books,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">So vainly seeking a receding rest,</span><br />
+I read the wonder in her steadfast looks:<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;Is this my son who lay upon my breast?&#8221;</span><br />
+<br />
+And when for me there is an end of time,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And this unsatisfying work is done,</span><br />
+If I shall meet thee in thy peaceful clime,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Young mother, wilt thou know thy gray-haired son?</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t2.jpg" alt="T" /></span>here is one other work of art which adorns my library&mdash;a medallion by a
+dear friend of mine, an eminent sculptor, the story of which I will put
+into his mouth. He calls the face</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 2.5em;">MY SCHOOLMATE.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_t.jpg" alt="T" /></span>he snows have settled on my head<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But not upon my heart,</span><br />
+And incidents of years long fled<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">From out my memory start.</span><br />
+My hand is cunning to contrive<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_127" id="Page_127">[Pg 127]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">The shapes my brain invents,</span><br />
+And keep in marble forms alive<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That which my soul contents;</span><br />
+And I have wife, and children tall,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Grandchildren cluster near,</span><br />
+And sweet the applause of men doth fall<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">On my undeafened ear.</span><br />
+But still my mind will backward turn<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For half a century,</span><br />
+And without reasoning will yearn<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For sight or news of thee,</span><br />
+Thou playmate of my boyhood days,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When life was all aglow,</span><br />
+When the sweetest thing was thy girlish praise,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As I drew thee o&#8217;er the snow</span><br />
+To the old red school-house by the road,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Where we learned to spell and read,</span><br />
+When thou wert all my fairy load<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And I was thy prancing steed.</span><br />
+<br />
+Oh! thou wert simple then and fair.<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Artless and unconstrained,</span><br />
+With quaintly knotted auburn hair<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">From which the wind refrained,</span><br />
+And from thine earnest steady eyes<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Shone out a nature pure,</span><br />
+Formed by kind Heaven, a man&#8217;s best prize,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To love and to endure.</span><br />
+<br />
+Oh! art thou still in life and time,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Or hast thou gone before?</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_128" id="Page_128">[Pg 128]</a></span>And hath thy lot been like to mine,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Or pinched and bare and sore?</span><br />
+And didst thou marry, or art thou<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Still of the spinster tribe?</span><br />
+Perchance thou art a widow now,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Steeled against second bribe?</span><br />
+Do grandsons round thy hearthstone play,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Or dost thou end thy race?</span><br />
+And could that auburn hair grow gray,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And wrinkles line thy face?</span><br />
+I cannot make thee old and plain&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I would not if I could&mdash;</span><br />
+And I recall thee without stain,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Simply and sweetly good;</span><br />
+And I have carved thy pretty head<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And hung it on my wall,</span><br />
+And to all men let it be said,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I like it best of all;</span><br />
+For on a far-off snowy road,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Before I had learned to read,</span><br />
+Thou wert all my fairy load<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And I was thy prancing steed!</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/long_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span> have reserved my queerest library companion till the last. It is not a
+book, although it is good for nothing but to read. It is not an autograph,
+although it is simply the name of an individual <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> It is my office sign
+which I have cherished, as a memento of busier days. Some singular
+reflections are roused when I gaze at</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_129" id="Page_129">[Pg 129]</a></span></p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 3em;">MY SHINGLE.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_m.jpg" alt="M" /></span>y shingle is battered and old,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">No longer deciphered with ease,</span><br />
+So I&#8217;ve taken it in from the cold,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And fastened it up on a frieze.</span><br />
+<br />
+A long generation ago,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With feelings of singular pride</span><br />
+I regarded its glittering show,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And pointed it out to my bride.</span><br />
+<br />
+Companions of youth have grown few,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Its loves and aversions are faint;</span><br />
+No spirit to make friends anew&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">An old enemy seems like a saint.</span><br />
+<br />
+My clients have paid the last fee<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For passage in Charon&#8217;s sad boat,</span><br />
+Imposing no duty on me<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Save to utter this querelous note;</span><br />
+<br />
+And still as I toil in life&#8217;s mills,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In loneliness growing profound,</span><br />
+To attend on the proof of their wills<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And swear that their wits were quite sound!</span><br />
+<br />
+So I work with the scissors and pen,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And to show of old courage a spark,</span><br />
+I must utter a jest now and then,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Like whistling of boys in the dark.</span><br />
+<br />
+I tack my old friend on the wall,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">So that infantile grandson of mine</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_130" id="Page_130">[Pg 130]</a></span>May not think, if my life he recall,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That I died without making a sign.</span><br />
+<br />
+When at court on the great judgment day<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With penitent suitors I mingle,</span><br />
+May my guilt be washed cleanly away,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Like that on my faded old shingle!</span></p></div>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/img_pg130.jpg" alt="O" /></span>f course my chief occupation in my library is reading and writing. To be
+sure, I do a good deal of thinking there. But there is another occupation
+which I practice to a great extent, which does not involve reading or
+writing at all, nor thinking to any considerable degree. That is playing
+solitaire. I play only one kind of this and that I have played for many
+years <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> It requires two packs of cards, and requires building on the aces
+and kings, and so I have them tacked down on a lap-board to save picking
+out and laying down every time <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> This particular game is called &#8220;St.
+Elba,&#8221; probably because Napoleon did not play it, and it can be &#8220;won&#8221; once
+in about sixty trials. I do not care for card-playing with others, but I
+have certain reasons for liking</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 4.5em;">SOLITAIRE.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_i.jpg" alt="I" /></span> like to play cards with a man of sense,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And allow him to play with me,</span><br />
+And so it has grown a delight intense<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To play solitaire on my knee.</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_131" id="Page_131">[Pg 131]</a></span><br />
+I love the quaint form of the sceptered king,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The simplicity of the ace,</span><br />
+The stolid knave like a wooden thing,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And her majesty&#8217;s smirking face.</span><br />
+<br />
+Diamonds, aces, and clubs and spades&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Their garb of respectable black</span><br />
+A moiety brilliant of red invades,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As they mingle in motley pack.</span><br />
+<br />
+Independent of anyone&#8217;s signal or leave,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Relieved from the bluffing of poker,</span><br />
+I&#8217;ve no apprehension of ace up a sleeve,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And fear no superfluous joker.</span><br />
+<br />
+I build up and down; all the cards I hold,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the game is always fair,</span><br />
+For I am honest, and so is my old<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Companion at solitaire.</span><br />
+<br />
+Let kings condescend to the lower grades,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Queens glitter with diamonds rare,</span><br />
+Knaves flourish their clubs, and peasants wield spades,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But give me my solitaire.</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg131.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr style="width: 50%;" />
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_132" id="Page_132">[Pg 132]</a></span></p>
+<h2><a name="XIX" id="XIX"></a>XIX.</h2>
+<p class="center"><span class="large">THE FRIENDSHIP OF BOOKS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/cap_t3.jpg" alt="T" /></span>o many peaceful men of the legal robe the companionship of books is
+inexpressibly dear. What a privilege it is to summon the greatest and most
+charming spirits of the past from their graves, and find them always
+willing to talk to us! How delightful to go to our well-known
+book-shelves, lay hands on our favorite authors&mdash;even in the dark, so well
+do we know them&mdash;take any volume, open it at any page, and in a few
+minutes lose all sense and remembrance of the real world, with its strife,
+its bitterness, its disappointments, its hollowness, its unfaithfulness,
+its selfishness, in the pictures of an ideal world! <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> The real world, do we
+say? Which is the real world, that of history or that of fiction? In this
+age of historic doubt and iconoclasm, are not the heroes of our favorite
+romances much more real than those of history? Captain Ed&#8217;ard Cuttle,
+mariner, is much more real to us than Captain Joseph Cook; Cooper&#8217;s Two
+Admirals than the great Nelson; Leather-Stocking than the yellow-haired
+Custer; Henry Esmond than any of the Pretenders; Hester Prynne and Becky
+Sharp than Catherine of Russia or Aspasia or Lucrezia; Sidney Carton than
+Philip Sidney. Even the kings and heroes who have lived in history live
+more vividly for us in romance. We know the crooked<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_133" id="Page_133">[Pg 133]</a></span> Richard and the
+crafty Louis XI. most familiarly, if not most accurately, through
+Shakespeare and Scott; and where in history do we get so haunting a
+picture of the great Napoleon and Waterloo as in Victor Hugo&#8217;s wondrous
+but inaccurate chapter? Happy is the man who has for his associates David,
+Solomon, Job, Paul, and John, in spite of the assaults of modern criticism
+upon the Scriptures! No one can shake our faith in Don Quixote, although
+the accounts of the Knight &#8220;without fear and without reproach&#8221; are so
+short and vague. There is no doubt about the travels of Christian,
+although those of Stanley may be questioned. The Vicar of Wakefield is a
+much more actual personage than Peter who preached the Crusades. Sir Roger
+de Coverley and his squire life are much more probable to us than Sir
+William Temple in his gardens <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> There is no character in romance who has
+not or might not have lived, but we are thrown into grave doubts of the
+saintly Washington and the devilish Napoleon depicted three quarters of a
+century ago. We cast history aside in scepticism and disgust; we cling to
+romance with faith and delight <img src="images/clover.jpg" alt="" /> &#8220;The things that are seen are temporal;
+the things that are not seen are eternal.&#8221; So let the writer hereof sing a
+song in praise of</p>
+
+<div class="poem">
+<p><span style="margin-left: 1em;">MY FRIENDS THE BOOKS.</span></p>
+
+<p><span class="dropfig"><img src="images/small_f.jpg" alt="F" /></span>riends of my youth and of my age<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Within my chamber wait,</span><br />
+Until I fondly turn the page<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And prove them wise and great.</span><br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_134" id="Page_134">[Pg 134]</a></span><br />
+At me they do not rudely glare<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With eye that luster lacks,</span><br />
+But knowing how I hate a stare,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Politely turn their backs.</span><br />
+<br />
+They never split my head with din,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Nor snuffle through their noses,</span><br />
+Nor admiration seek to win<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By inartistic poses.</span><br />
+<br />
+If I should chance to fall asleep,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They do not scowl or snap,</span><br />
+But prudently their counsel keep<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Till I have had my nap.</span><br />
+<br />
+And if I choose to rout them out<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Unseasonably at night,</span><br />
+They do not chafe nor curse nor pout,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But rise all clothed and bright.</span><br />
+<br />
+They ne&#8217;er intrude with silly say,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They never scold nor worry;</span><br />
+They ne&#8217;er suspect and ne&#8217;er betray,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They&#8217;re never in a hurry.</span><br />
+<br />
+Anacreon never gets quite full,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Nor Horace too flirtatious;</span><br />
+Swift makes due fun of Johnny Bull,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And Addison is gracious.</span><br />
+<br />
+Saint-Simon and Grammont rehearse<br />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_135" id="Page_135">[Pg 135]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Their tales of court with glee;</span><br />
+For all their scandal I&#8217;m no worse,&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They never peach on me.</span><br />
+<br />
+For what I owe Montaigne, no dread<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To meet him on the morrow;</span><br />
+And better still, it must be said,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He never wants to borrow.</span><br />
+<br />
+Paul never asks, though sure to preach,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Why I don&#8217;t come to church;</span><br />
+Though Dr. Johnson strives to teach,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I do not fear his birch.</span><br />
+<br />
+My Dickens never is away<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Whene&#8217;er I choose to call;</span><br />
+I need not wait for Thackeray<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In chill palatial hall.</span><br />
+<br />
+I help to bring Amelia to,<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Who always is a-fainting;</span><br />
+I love the Oxford graduate who<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Explains great Turner&#8217;s painting.</span><br />
+<br />
+My memory is full of graves<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of friends in days gone by;</span><br />
+But Time these sweet companions saves,&mdash;<br />
+<span style="margin-left: 1em;">These friends who never die!</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg135.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p style="color: maroon;" class="title">SO HERE ENDETH &#8220;IN THE TRACK OF THE
+BOOK-WORM.&#8221; <img src="images/red_clover.jpg" alt="" /> PRINTED BY ME, ELBERT
+HUBBARD, AT THE ROYCROFT SHOP <img src="images/red_clover.jpg" alt="" /> IN
+EAST AURORA, N. Y., U. S. A., AND COMPLETED
+THIS TWENTY-SIXTH DAY OF <img src="images/img_pg136b.jpg" alt="" />
+JUNE, MDCCCXCVII.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter"><img src="images/img_pg136c.jpg" alt="" /></div>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg's In the Track of the Bookworm, by Irving Browne
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+</body>
+</html>
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of In the Track of the Bookworm, by Irving Browne
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: In the Track of the Bookworm
+
+Author: Irving Browne
+
+Release Date: July 17, 2011 [EBook #36764]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK IN THE TRACK OF THE BOOKWORM ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by The Online Distributed Proofreading Team at
+http://www.pgdp.net (This file was produced from images
+generously made available by The Internet Archive.)
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+  IN THE TRACK OF THE BOOK-WORM
+  by Irving Browne: thoughts,
+  fancies and gentle gibes on Collecting and
+  Collectors by one of them.
+
+
+  DONE INTO A BOOK AT THE ROYCROFT
+  PRINTING SHOP AT EAST AURORA,
+  NEW YORK, U. S. A.
+  MDCCCXCVII
+
+
+
+
+  Copyrighted by
+  The Roycroft Printing Shop
+  1897
+
+
+
+
+Of this edition but five hundred and ninety copies were printed and types
+then distributed. Each copy is signed and numbered and this book is number
+173
+
+Irving Browne
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTERS.
+
+
+   1. Objects of Collection                          9
+
+   2. Who Have Collected                            11
+
+   3. Diverse Tastes                                18
+
+   4. The Size of Books                             21
+
+   5. Binding                                       25
+
+   6. Paper                                         32
+
+   7. Women as Collectors                           36
+
+   8. The Illustrator                               47
+
+   9. Book-Plates                                   66
+
+  10. The Book-Auctioneer                           73
+
+  11. The Book-Seller                               77
+
+  12. The Public Librarian                          84
+
+  13. Does Book Collecting Pay                      88
+
+  14. The Book-Worm's Faults                        93
+
+  15. Poverty as a Means of Enjoyment              103
+
+  16. The Arrangement of Books                     105
+
+  17. Enemies of Books                             108
+
+  18. Library Companions                           121
+
+  19. The Friendship of Books                      133
+
+
+
+
+BALLADS.
+
+
+   1. How a Bibliomaniac Binds his Books            26
+
+   2. The Bibliomaniac's Assignment of Binders      28
+
+   3. The Failing Books                             33
+
+   4. Suiting Paper to Subject                      34
+
+   5. The Sentimental Chambermaid                   37
+
+   6. A Woman's Idea of a Library                   42
+
+   7. The Shy Portraits                             54
+
+   8. The Snatchers                                 71
+
+   9. The Stolid Auctioneer                         75
+
+  10. The Prophetic Book                            80
+
+  11. The Book-Seller                               82
+
+  12. The Public Librarian                          85
+
+  13. The Book-Worm does not care for Nature        97
+
+  14. How I go A-Fishing                            99
+
+  15. The Book-Thief                               111
+
+  16. The Smoke Traveler                           112
+
+  17. The Fire in the Library                      116
+
+  18. Cleaning the Library                         117
+
+  19. Ode to Omar                                  119
+
+  20. My Dog                                       121
+
+  21. My Clocks                                    123
+
+  22. A Portrait                                   125
+
+  23. My Schoolmate                                126
+
+  24. My Shingle                                   129
+
+  25. Solitaire                                    130
+
+  26. My Friends the Books                         133
+
+
+
+
+  To book-worms all, of high or low degree,
+    Whate'er of madness be their stages,
+  And just as well unknown as known to me,
+    I dedicate these trifling pages,
+  In hope that when they turn them o'er
+  They will not find the Track a bore.
+
+
+
+
+The Track of the Book-Worm.
+
+
+
+
+I.
+
+OBJECTS OF COLLECTION.
+
+
+Philosophers have made various and ingenious but incomplete attempts to
+form a succinct definition of the animal, Man. At first thought it might
+seem that a perfect definition would be, an animal who makes collections.
+But one must remember that the magpie does this. Yet this definition is as
+good as any, and comes nearer exactness than most. What has not the
+animal Man collected? Clocks, watches, snuff-boxes, canes, fans, laces,
+precious stones, china, coins, paper money, spoons, prints, paintings,
+tulips, orchids, hens, horses, match-boxes, postal stamps, miniatures,
+violins, show-bills, play-bills, swords, buttons, shoes, china slippers,
+spools, birds, butterflies, beetles, saddles, skulls, wigs, lanterns,
+book-plates, knockers, crystal balls, shells, penny toys, death-masks,
+tea-pots, autographs, rugs, armour, pipes, arrow heads, locks of hair and
+key locks, and hats (Jules Verne's "Tale of a Hat"), these are some of the
+most prominent subjects in search of which the animal Man runs up and down
+the earth, and spends time and money without scruple or stint. But all
+these curious objects of search fall into insignificance when compared
+with the ancient, noble and useful passion for collecting books. One of
+the wisest of the human race said, the only earthly immortality is in
+writing a book; and the desire to accumulate these evidences of earthly
+immortality needs no defense among cultivated men.
+
+
+
+
+II.
+
+WHO HAVE COLLECTED BOOKS.
+
+
+The mania for book-collecting is by no means a modern disease, but has
+existed ever since there were books to gather, and has infected many of
+the wisest and most potent names in history. Euripides is ridiculed by
+Aristophanes in "The Frogs" for collecting books. Of the Roman emperor,
+Gordian, who flourished (or rather did not flourish, because he was slain
+after a reign of thirty-six days) in the third century, Gibbon says,
+"twenty-two acknowledged concubines and a library of sixty thousand
+volumes attested the variety of his inclinations." This combination of
+uxorious and literary tastes seems to have existed in another monarch of a
+later period--Henry VIII.--the seeming disproportion of whose expenditure
+of 10,800 pounds for jewels in three years, during which he spent but 100
+pounds for books and binding, is explained by the fact that he was
+indebted for the contents of his libraries to the plunder of monasteries.
+Henry printed a few copies of his book against Luther on vellum. Cicero,
+who possessed a superb library, especially rich in Greek, at his villa in
+Tusculum, thus describes his favorite acquisitions: "Books to quicken the
+intelligence of youth, delight age, decorate prosperity, shelter and
+solace us in adversity, bring enjoyment at home, befriend us out-of-doors,
+pass the night with us, travel with us, go into the country with us."
+
+Petrarch, who collected books not simply for his own gratification, but
+aspired to become the founder of a permanent library at Venice, gave his
+books to the Church of St. Mark; but the greater part of them perished
+through neglect, and only a small part remains. Boccaccio, anticipating an
+early death, offered his library to Petrarch, his dear friend, on his own
+terms, to insure its preservation, and the poet promised to care for the
+collection in case he survived Boccaccio; but the latter, outliving
+Petrarch, bequeathed his books to the Augustinians of Florence, and some
+of them are still shown to visitors in the Laurentinian Library. From
+Boccaccio's own account of his collection, one must believe his books
+quite inappropriate for a monastic library, and the good monks probably
+instituted an auto da fe for most of them, like that which befell the
+knightly romances in "Don Quixote." Perhaps the naughty story-teller
+intended the donation as a covert satire. The walls of the room which
+formerly contained Montaigne's books, and is at this day exhibited to
+pilgrims, are covered with inscriptions burnt in with branding-irons on
+the beams and rafters by the eccentric and delightful essayist. The
+author of "Ivanhoe" adorned his magnificent library with suits of superb
+armor, and luxuriated in demonology and witchcraft. The caustic Swift was
+in the habit of annotating his books, and writing on the fly-leaves a
+summary opinion of the author's merits; whatever else he had, he owned no
+Shakespeare, nor can any reference to him be found in the nineteen volumes
+of Swift's works. Military men seem always to have had a passion for
+books. To say nothing of the literary and rhetorical tastes of Caesar, "the
+foremost man of all time," Frederick the Great had libraries at Sans
+Souci, Potsdam, and Berlin, in which he arranged the volumes by classes
+without regard to size. Thick volumes he rebound in sections for more
+convenient use, and his favorite French authors he sometimes caused to be
+reprinted in compact editions to his taste. The great Conde inherited a
+valuable library from his father, and enlarged and loved it. Marlborough
+had twenty-five books on vellum, all earlier than 1496. The hard-fighting
+Junot had a vellum library which sold in London for 1,400 pounds, while
+his great master was not too busy in conquering Europe not only to solace
+himself in his permanent libraries, and in books which he carried with him
+in his expeditions, but to project and actually commence the printing of a
+camp library of duodecimo volumes, without margins, and in thin covers, to
+embrace some three thousand volumes, and which he had designed to complete
+in six years by employing one hundred and twenty compositors and
+twenty-five editors, at an outlay of about 163,000 pounds. St. Helena
+destroyed this scheme. It is curious to note that Napoleon despised
+Voltaire as heartily as Frederick admired him, but gave Fielding and Le
+Sage places among his traveling companions; while the Bibliomaniac appears
+in his direction to his librarian: "I will have fine editions and handsome
+bindings. I am rich enough for that." The main thing that shakes one's
+confidence in the correctness of his literary taste is that he was fond of
+"Ossian." Julius Caesar also formed a traveling library of forty-four
+little volumes, contained in an oak case measuring 16 by 11 by 3 inches,
+covered with leather. The books are bound in white vellum, and consist of
+history, philosophy, theology, and poetry, in Greek and Latin. The
+collector was Sir Julius Caesar, of England, and this exquisite and unique
+collection is in the British Museum. The books were all printed between
+1591 and 1616.
+
+Southey brought together fourteen thousand volumes, the most valuable
+collection which had up to that time been acquired by any man whose means
+and estate lay, as he once said of himself, in his inkstand. Time fails me
+to speak of Erasmus, De Thou, Grotius, Goethe, Bodley; Hans Sloane, whose
+private library of fifty thousand volumes was the beginning of that of the
+British Museum; the Cardinal Borromeo, who founded the Ambrosian Library
+at Milan with his own forty thousand volumes, and the other great names
+entitled to the description of Bibliomaniac. We must not forget Sir
+Richard Whittington, of feline fame, who gave 400 pounds to found the
+library of Christ's Hospital, London.
+
+The fair sex, good and bad, have been lovers of books or founders of
+libraries; witness the distinguished names of Lady Jane Gray, Catherine De
+Medicis, and Diane de Poictiers.
+
+It only remains to speak of the great opium-eater, who was a sort of
+literary ghoul, famed for borrowing books and never returning them, and
+whose library was thus made up of the enforced contributions of
+friends--for who would have dared refuse the loan of a book to Thomas de
+Quincey? The name of the unhappy man would have descended to us with that
+of the incendiary of the Temple of Diana at Ephesus. But the great Thomas
+was recklessly careless and slovenly in his use of books; and Burton, in
+the "Book-hunter," tells us that "he once gave in copy written on the
+edges of a tall octavo 'Somnium Scipionis,' and as he did not obliterate
+the original matter, the printer was rather puzzled, and made a funny
+jumble between the letter-press Latin and the manuscript English." I
+seriously fear that with him must be ranked the gentle Elia, who said: "A
+book reads the better which is our own, and has been so long known to us
+that we know the topography of its blots and dog's ears, and can trace the
+dirt in it to having read it at tea with buttered muffins, or over a pipe,
+which I think is the maximum." And yet a great degree of slovenliness may
+be excused in Charles because, according to Leigh Hunt, he once gave a
+kiss to an old folio Chapman's "Homer," and when asked how he knew his
+books one from the other, for hardly any were lettered, he answered: "How
+does a shepherd know his sheep?"
+
+The love of books displayed by the sensual Henry and the pugnacious Junot
+is not more remarkable than that of the epicurean and sumptuous Lucullus,
+to whom Pompey, when sick, having been directed by his physician to eat a
+thrush for dinner, and learning from his servants that in summer-time
+thrushes were not to be found anywhere but in Lucullus' fattening coops,
+refused to be indebted for his meal, observing: "So if Lucullus had not
+been an epicure, Pompey had not lived." Of him the veracious Plutarch
+says: "His furnishing a library, however, deserved praise and record, for
+he collected very many and choice manuscripts; and the use they were put
+to was even more magnificent than the purchase, the library being always
+open, and the walks and reading rooms about it free to all Greeks, whose
+delight it was to leave their other occupations and hasten thither as to
+the habitation of the Muses."
+
+It is not recorded that Socrates collected books--his wife probably
+objected--but we have his word for it that he loved them. He did not love
+the country, and the only thing that could tempt him thither was a book.
+Acknowledging this to Phaedrus he says:
+
+"Very true, my good friend; and I hope that you will excuse me when you
+hear the reason, which is, that I am a lover of knowledge, and the men who
+dwell in the city are my teachers, and not the trees or the country.
+Though I do indeed believe that you have found a spell with which to draw
+me out of the city into the country, like a hungry cow before whom a bough
+or a bunch of fruit is waved. For only hold up before me in like manner a
+book, and you may lead me all round Attica, and over the wide world. And
+now having arrived, I intend to lie down, and do you choose any posture in
+which you can read best."
+
+
+
+
+III.
+
+DIVERSE TASTES.
+
+
+It is fortunate for the harmony of book-collectors that they do not all
+desire the same thing, just as it was fortunate for their young State that
+all the Romans did not want the same Sabine woman. Otherwise the Helenic
+battle of the books would be fiercer than it is. Thus there are
+bibliomaniacs who reprint rare books from their own libraries in limited
+numbers; authors, like Walpole, who print their own works, and whose fame
+as printers is better deserved than their reputation as writers; like
+Thackeray, who design the illustrations for their own romances, or, like
+Astor, who procure a single copy of their novel to be illustrated at
+lavish expense by artists; amateurs who bind their own books; lunatics who
+yearn for books wholly engraved, or printed only on one side of the leaf,
+or Greek books wholly in capitals, or others in the italic letter; or
+black-letter fanciers; or tall copy men; or rubricists, missal men, or
+first edition men, or incunabulists.
+
+One seeks only ancient books; another limited editions; another those
+privately printed; a fourth wants nothing but presentation copies; yet
+another only those that have belonged to famous men, and still another
+illustrated or illuminated books. There is a perfectly rabid and incurable
+class, of whom the most harmless are devoted to pamphlets; another,
+rather more dangerous, to incorrect or suppressed editions; and a third,
+stark mad, to play-bills and portraits. One patronizes the drama, one
+poetry, one the fine arts, another books about books and their collectors;
+and a very recherche class devote themselves to works on playing-cards,
+angling, magic, or chess, emblems, dances of death, or the jest books and
+facetiae. Finally, there are those unhappy beings who run up and down for
+duplicates, searching for every edition of their favorite authors. In very
+recent days there has arisen a large class who demand the first editions
+of popular novelists like Dickens, Thackeray and Hawthorne, and will pay
+large prices for these issues which have no value except that of rarity. I
+can quite understand the enthusiasm of the collector over the beautiful
+first editions of the Greek and Latin classics, or for the first "Paradise
+Lost," or even for the ugly first folio "Shakespeare," and why he should
+prefer the comparatively rude first Walton's Angler to Pickering's
+edition, the handsomest of this century, with its monumental title page.
+But why a first edition of a popular novel should be more desirable than a
+late one, which is usually the more elegant, I confess I cannot
+understand. It is one of those things which, like the mystery of religion,
+we must take on trust. So when a bookseller tells me that a copy of the
+first issue of "The Scarlet Letter" has sold for seventy-five dollars,
+and that a copy of the second, with the same date, but put out six months
+later, is worth only seventy-five cents, I open my eyes but not my purse,
+especially when I consider that the second is greatly superior to the
+first on account of its famous preface of apology, and when I read of some
+one's bidding $1875 for a copy of Poe's worthless "Tamerlane," I am
+flattered by the reflection that there is one man in the world whom I
+believe to be eighteen hundred and seventy-five times as great a fool as I
+am!
+
+
+
+
+IV.
+
+THE SIZE OF BOOKS.
+
+
+Were I a despotic ruler of the universe I would make it a serious offense
+to publish a book larger than royal octavo. Books should be made to read,
+or at all events to look at, and in this view comfort and ease should be
+consulted. Any one who has ever undertaken to read a huge quarto or folio
+will sympathize with this view. The older and lazier the Book-Worm grows
+the more he longs for little books, which he can hold in one hand without
+getting a cramp, or at least support with arms in an elbow chair without
+fatigue. Darwin remorselessly split big books in two. Mr. Slater says in
+"Book Collecting:" "When the library at Sion College took fire the
+attendants, at the risk of their lives, rescued a pile of books from the
+flames, and it is said that the librarian wept when he found that the
+porters had taken it for granted that the value of a book was in exact
+proportion to its size." Few of us, I suspect, ever read our family Bible,
+and all of us probably groan when we lift out the unabridged dictionary.
+The "Century Dictionary" is a luxury because it is published in small and
+convenient parts. I cannot conceive any good in a big book except that the
+ladies may use it to press flowers or mosses in, or the nurses may put it
+in a chair to sit the baby on at table. I have heard of a gentleman who
+inherited a mass of folio volumes and arranged them as shelves for his
+smaller treasures, and of another who arranged his 12-mos on a stand made
+up of the seventeen volumes of Pinkerton's "Voyages" and Denon's "Egypt"
+for shelves. What reader would not prefer a dainty little Elzevir to the
+huge folio, Caesar's "Commentaries," even with the big bull in it, and the
+wicker idol full of burning human victims? What can be more pleasing than
+the modern Quantin edition of the classics? Or, to speak of a popular
+book, take the "Pastels in Prose," the most exquisite book for the price
+ever known in the history of printing. The small book ought however to
+be easily legible. The health and comfort of the human eye should be
+consulted in the size of the type. Nothing can be worse in this regard
+than the Pickering diamond classics, if meant to be read; and it seems
+that there are too many of them to be intended as mere curiosities of
+printing. Let us approve the exit of the folio and the quarto, and applaud
+the modern tendency toward little and handy volumes. Large paper however
+is a worthy distinction when the subject is worth the distinction and the
+edition is not too large. Nothing raises the gorge of the true Book-Worm
+more than to see an issue on large paper of a row of histories, for
+example; and the very worst instance conceivable was a large paper
+Webster's "Unabridged Dictionary" issued some years ago. The book thus
+distinguished ought to be a classic, or peculiar for elegance, never a
+series, or stereotyped, the first struck off, and the issue ought not to
+be more than from fifty to one hundred copies; any larger issue is not
+worth the extra margin bestowed, and no experienced buyer will tolerate
+it. But if all these conditions are observed, the large paper copies
+bear the same relation to the small that a proof before letters of a print
+holds to the other impressions. Large margins are very pleasant in a
+library as well as in Wall Street, and much more apt to be permanent.
+There are some favorite books of which the possessor longs in vain for a
+large copy, as for instance, the Pickering "Walton and Cotton."
+
+A great deal of fun is made of the Book-Worm because of his desire for
+large paper and of his insistence on uncut edges, but his reasons are
+sound and his taste is unimpeachable. The tricks of the book-trade to
+catch the inexperienced with the bait of large paper are very amusing.
+"Strictly limited" to so many copies for England and so many for America,
+say a thousand in all, or else the number is not stated, and always
+described as an edition de luxe, and its looks are always very repulsive.
+But the bait is eagerly bitten at by a shoal of beings anxious to get one
+of these rarities--a class to one of whom I once found it necessary to
+explain that "uncut edges" does not mean leaves not cut open, and that he
+would not injure the value of his book by being able to read it, and was
+not bound to peep in surreptitiously like a maid-servant at a door "on
+the jar." I once knew a satirical Book-Worm who issued a pamphlet, "one
+hundred copies on large paper, none on small." There is no just
+distinction in an ugly large-paper issue, and sometimes it is not nearly
+so beautiful as the small, especially when the latter has uncut edges. The
+independence of the collector who prefers the small in such circumstances
+is to be commended and imitated.
+
+Too great inequality in uncut edges is also to be shunned as an ugliness.
+It seems that some French books are printed on paper of two different
+sizes, the effect of which is very grotesque, and the device is a catering
+to a very crude and extravagant taste.
+
+
+
+
+V.
+
+BINDING.
+
+
+The binding of books for several centuries has held the dignity of a fine
+art, quite independent of printing. This has been demonstrated by
+exhibitions in this country and abroad. But every collector ought to
+observe fitness in the binding which he procures to be executed. True
+fitness prevails in most old and fine bindings; seldom was a costly garb
+bestowed on a book unworthy of it. But in many a luxurious library we see
+a modern binding fit for a unique or rare book given to one that is
+comparatively worthless or common. Not to speak of bindings that are real
+works of art, many collectors go astray in dressing lumber in purple and
+fine linen--putting full levant morocco on blockhead histories and such
+stuff that perishes in the not using. It is a sad spectacle to behold a
+unique binding wasted on a book of no more value than a backgammon board.
+There are of course not a great many of us who can afford unique bindings,
+but those who cannot should at least observe propriety and fitness in this
+regard, and draw the line severely between full dress and demi-toilette,
+and keep a sharp eye to appropriateness of color. I have known several men
+who bound their books all alike. Nothing could be worse except one who
+should bind particular subjects in special styles, pace Mr. Ellwanger,
+who, in "The Story of My House," advises the Book-Worm to "bind the poets
+in yellow or orange, books on nature in olive, the philosophers in blue,
+the French classics in red," etc. I am curious to know what color this
+pleasant writer would adopt for the binding of his books by military men,
+such for example as "Major Walpole's Anecdotes." (p. 262).
+
+Ambrose Fermin Didot recommended binding the "Iliad" in red and the
+"Odyssey" in blue, for the Greek rhapsodists wore a scarlet cloak when
+they recited the former and a blue one when they recited the latter. The
+churchmen he would clothe in violet, cardinals in scarlet, philosophers in
+black.
+
+I have imagined
+
+  HOW A BIBLIOMANIAC BINDS HIS BOOKS.
+
+  I'd like my favorite books to bind
+    So that their outward dress
+  To every bibliomaniac's mind
+    Their contents should express.
+
+  Napoleon's life should glare in red,
+    John Calvin's gloom in blue;
+  Thus they would typify bloodshed
+    And sour religion's hue.
+
+  The prize-ring record of the past
+    Must be in blue and black;
+  While any color that is fast
+    Would do for Derby track.
+
+  The Popes in scarlet well may go;
+    In jealous green, Othello;
+  In gray, Old Age of Cicero,
+    And London Cries in yellow.
+
+  My Walton should his gentle art
+    In Salmon best express,
+  And Penn and Fox the friendly heart
+    In quiet drab confess.
+
+  Statistics of the lumber trade
+    Should be embraced in boards,
+  While muslin for the inspired Maid
+    A fitting garb affords.
+
+  Intestine wars I'd clothe in vellum,
+    While pig-skin Bacon grasps,
+  And flat romances, such as "Pelham,"
+    Should stand in calf with clasps.
+
+  Blind-tooled should be blank verse and rhyme
+    Of Homer and of Milton;
+  But Newgate Calendar of Crime
+    I'd lavishly dab gilt on.
+
+  The edges of a sculptor's life
+    May fitly marbled be,
+  But sprinkle not, for fear of strife,
+    A Baptist history.
+
+  Crimea's warlike facts and dates
+    Of fragrant Russia smell;
+  The subjugated Barbary States
+    In crushed Morocco dwell.
+
+  But oh! that one I hold so dear
+    Should be arrayed so cheap
+  Gives me a qualm; I sadly fear
+    My Lamb must be half-sheep.
+
+No doubt a Book-Worm so far gone as this could invent stricter analogies
+and make even the binder fit the book.
+
+So we should have
+
+  THE BIBLIOMANIAC'S ASSIGNMENT OF BINDERS.
+
+  If I could bring the dead to day,
+    I would your soul with wonder fill
+  By pointing out a novel way
+    For bibliopegistic skill.
+
+  My Walton, Trautz should take in hand,
+    Or else I'd give him o'er to Hering;
+  Matthews should make the Gospels stand
+    A solemn warning to the erring.
+
+  The history of the Inquisition,
+    With all its diabolic train
+  Of cruelty and superstition,
+    Should fitly be arrayed by Payne.
+
+  A book of dreams by Bedford clad,
+    A Papal history by De Rome,
+  Should make the sense of fitness glad
+    In every bibliomaniac's home.
+
+  As our first mother's folly cost
+    Her sex so dear, and makes men grieve,
+  So Milton's plaint of Eden lost
+    Would be appropriate to Eve.
+
+  Hayday would make "One Summer" be
+    Doubly attractive to the view;
+  While General Wolfe's biography
+    Should be the work of Pasdeloup.
+
+  For lives of dwarfs, like Thomas Thumb,
+    Petit's the man by nature made,
+  And when Munchasen strikes us dumb
+    It is by means of Gascon aid.
+
+  Thus would I the great binders blend
+    In harmony with work before 'em,
+  And so Riviere I would commend
+    To Turner's "Liber Fluviorum."
+
+After all, whether one can afford a three-hundred or a three-dollar
+binding, the gentle Elia has said the last word about fitness of bindings
+when he observed: "To be strong-backed and neat-bound is the desideratum
+of a volume; magnificence comes after. This, when it can be afforded, is
+not to be lavished on all kinds of books indiscriminately.
+
+"Where we know that a book is at once both good and rare--where the
+individual is almost the species,
+
+  'We know not where is that Prometian torch
+  That can its light relumine;'
+
+"Such a book for instance as the 'Life of the Duke of Newcastle' by his
+Duchess--no casket is rich enough, no casing sufficiently durable, to
+honor and keep safe such a jewel.
+
+"To view a well arranged assortment of block-headed encyclopoedias
+(Anglicana or Metropolitanas), set out in an array of Russia and Morocco,
+when a tithe of that good leather would comfortably reclothe my shivering
+folios, would renovate Parcelsus himself, and enable old Raymond Lully to
+look like himself again in the world. I never see these impostors but I
+long to strip them and warm my ragged veterans in their spoils."
+
+There spoke the true Book-Worm. What a pity he could not have sold a part
+of his good sense and fine taste to some of the affluent collectors of
+this period!
+
+Doubtless an experienced binder could give some amusing examples of
+mistakes in indorsing books with their names. One remains in my memory. A
+French binder, entrusted with a French translation of "Uncle Tom's Cabin,"
+in two volumes, put "L'Oncle" on both, and numbered them "Tome 1," "Tome
+2." Charles Cowden-Clarke tells of his having ordered Leigh Hunt's poems
+entitled "Foliage" to be bound in green, and how the book came home in
+blue. That would answer for the "blue grass" region of Kentucky. I have
+no patience with those disgusting realists who bind books in human or
+snake skin. In his charming book on the Law Reporters, Mr. Wallace says of
+Desaussures' South Carolina Reports: "When these volumes are found in
+their original binding most persons, I think, are struck with its
+peculiarity. The cause of it is, I believe, that it was done by negroes."
+What the "peculiarity" is he does not disclose. But book-binding seems to
+be an unwonted occupation for negro slaves. It was not often that they
+beat skins, although their own skins were frequently beaten.
+
+
+
+
+VI.
+
+PAPER.
+
+
+It is a serious question whether the art of printing has been improved
+except in facility. Is not the first printed book still the finest ever
+printed? But in one point I am certain that the moderns have fallen away,
+at least in the production of cheap books, and that is in the quality and
+finish of the paper. Not to speak of injurious devices to make the book
+heavy, the custom of calendering the paper, or making it smooth and shiny,
+practised by some important publishers, is bad for the eyes, and the
+result is not pleasant to look at. It is like the glare of the glass over
+the framed print. It is said to be necessary to the production of the
+modern "process" pictures. Even here however there is a just mean, for
+some of the modern paper is absurdly rough, and very difficult for a good
+impression of the types. Modern paper however has one advantage: Mr.
+Blades, in his pleasant "Enemies of Books," tells us "that the worm will
+not touch it," it is so adulterated. One hint I would give the
+publishers--allow us a few more fly leaves, so that we may paste in
+newspaper cuttings, and make memoranda and suggestions.
+
+It is predicted by some that our nineteenth century books--at least those
+of the last third--will not last; that the paper and ink are far inferior
+to those of preceding centuries, and that the destroying tooth of time
+will work havoc with them. No doubt the modern paper and the modern ink
+are inferior to those of the earlier ages of printing, when making a book
+was a fine art and a work of conscience, but whether the modern
+productions of the press will ultimately fade and crumble is a question to
+be determined only by a considerable lapse of time, which probably no one
+living will be qualified to pronounce upon. Take for what they are worth
+my sentiments respecting
+
+  THE FAILING BOOKS.
+
+  They say our books will disappear,
+    That ink will fade and paper rot--
+  I sha'n't be here,
+    So I don't care a jot.
+
+  The best of them I know by heart,
+    As for the rest they make me tired;
+  The viler part
+    May well be fired.
+
+  Oh, what a hypocritic show
+    Will be the bibliomaniac's hoard!
+  Cheat as hollow
+    As a backgammon board.
+
+  Just think of Lamb without his stuffing,
+    And the iconoclastic Howells,
+  Who spite of puffing
+    Is destitute of bowels.
+
+  'Twould make me laugh to see the stare
+    Of mousing bibliomaniac fond
+  At pages bare
+    As Overreach's bond.
+
+  Those empty titles will displease
+    The earnest student seeking knowledge,--
+  Barren degrees,
+    Like these of Western College.
+
+  That common stuff, "Excelsior,"
+    In poetry so lacking,
+  I care not for--
+    'Tis only fit for packing.
+
+It has occurred to me that publishers might appeal to bibliomaniacal
+tastes by paying a little more attention to their paper, and I have thrown
+a few suggestions on this point into rhyme, so that they may be readily
+committed to memory:
+
+  SUITING PAPER TO SUBJECT.
+
+  Printers the paper should adapt
+    Unto the subject of the book,
+  Thus making buyers wonder-rapt
+    Before they at the contents look.
+
+  Thus Beerbohm's learned book on Eggs
+    On a laid paper he should print,
+  But Motley's "Dutch Republic" begs
+    Rice paper should its matter hint.
+
+  That curious problem of what Man
+    Inhabited the Iron Mask
+  Than Whatman paper never can
+    A more suggestive medium ask.
+
+  The "Book of Dates," by Mr. Haydon,
+    Should be on paper calendered;
+  That Swift on Servants be arrayed on
+    A hand-made paper is inferred.
+
+  Though angling-books have never been
+    Accustomed widely to appear
+  On fly-paper, 'twould be no sin
+    To have them wormed from front to rear.
+
+  The good that authors thus may reap
+    I'll not pursue to tedium,
+  But hint, for books on raising sheep
+    Buckram is just the medium.
+
+
+
+
+VII.
+
+WOMEN AS COLLECTORS.
+
+
+Women collect all sorts of things except books. To them the book-sense
+seems to be denied, and it is difficult for them to appreciate its
+existence in men. To be sure, there have been a few celebrated
+book-collectors among the fair sex, but they have usually been rather
+reprehensible ladies, like Diane de Poictiers and Madame Pompadour.
+Probably Aspasia was a collector of MSS. Lady Jane Grey seems to have been
+a virtuous exception, and she was cruelly "cropped." I am told that there
+are a few women now-a-days who collect books, and only a few weeks ago a
+lady read, before a woman's club in Chicago, a paper on the Collection and
+Adornment of Books, for which occasion a fair member of the club solicited
+me to write her something appropriate to read, which of course I was glad
+to do. But this was in Chicago, where the women go in for culture. In
+thirty years' haunting of the book-shops and print-shops of New York, I
+have never seen a woman catching a cold in her head by turning over the
+large prints, nor soiling her dainty gloves by handling the dirty old
+books. Women have been depicted in literature in many different
+occupations, situations and pleasures, but in all the literature that I
+have read I can recall only one instance in which she is imagined a
+book-buyer. This is in "The Sentimental Journey," and in celebrating the
+unique instance let me rise to a nobler strain and sing a song of
+
+  THE SENTIMENTAL CHAMBERMAID.
+
+  When you're in Paris, do not fail
+    To seek the Quai de Conti,
+  Where in the roguish Parson's tale,
+    Upon the river front he
+  Bespoke the pretty chambermaid
+  Too innocent to be afraid.
+
+  On this book-seller's mouldy stall,
+    Crammed full of volumes musty,
+  I made a bibliophilic call
+    And saw, in garments rusty,
+  The ancient vender, queer to view,
+  In breeches, buckles, and a queue.
+
+  And while to find that famous book,
+    "Les Egaremens du Coeur,"
+  I dilligently undertook,
+    I suddenly met her;
+  She held a small green satin purse,
+  And spite of Time looked none the worse.
+
+  I told her she was known to Fame
+    Through ministerial Mentor,
+  And though I had not heard her name,
+    That this should not prevent her
+  From listening to the homage due
+  To one to Sentiment so true.
+
+  She blushed; I bowed in courtly fashion;
+    In pockets of my trousers
+  Then sought a crown to vouch my passion,
+    Without intent to rouse hers;
+  But I had left my purse 'twould seem--
+  And then I woke--'twas but a dream!
+
+  The heart will wander, never doubt,
+    Though waking faith it keep;
+  That is exceptionally stout
+    Which strays but in its sleep;
+  And hearts must always turn to her
+    Who loved, "Les Egaremens du Coeur."
+
+M. Uzanne, in "The Book-Hunter in Paris," avers that "the woman of fashion
+never goes book-hunting," and he puts the aphorism in italics. He also
+says that the occasional woman at the book-stalls, "if by chance she wants
+a book, tries to bargain for it as if it were a lobster or a fowl." Also
+that the book-stall keepers are always watchful of the woman with an
+ulster, a water-proof, or a muff. These garments are not always impervious
+to books, it seems.
+
+The imitative efforts of women at "extra-illustrating" are usually limited
+to buying a set of photographs at Rome and sticking them into the cracks
+of "The Marble Faun," and giving it away to a friend as a marked favor.
+Poor Hawthorne! he would wriggle in his grave if he could see his fair
+admirers doing this. Mr. Blades certainly ought to have included women
+among the enemies of books. They generally regard the husband's or
+father's expenditure on books as so much spoil of their gowns and jewels.
+We book-men are up to all the tricks of getting the books into the house
+without their knowing it. What joy and glee when we successfully smuggle
+in a parcel from the express, right under our wife's nose, while she is
+busy talking scandal to another woman in the drawing-room! The good
+creatures make us positively dishonest and endanger our eternal welfare.
+How we "hustle around" in their absence, when the embargo is temporarily
+raised; and when the new purchases are detected, how we pretend that they
+are old, and wonder that they have not seen them before, and rattle away
+in a fevered, embarrassed manner about the scarcity and value of the
+surreptitious purchases, and how meanly conscious we are all the time that
+the pretense is unavailing and the fair despots see right through us.
+God has given them an instinct that is more than a match for our
+acknowledged superior intellect. And the good wife smiles quietly but
+satirically, and says, in the form in that case made and provided, "My
+dear, you'll certainly ruin yourself buying books!" with a sigh that
+agitates a very costly diamond necklace reposing on her shapely bosom; or
+she archly shakes at us a warning finger all aglow with ruby and sapphire,
+which she has bought on installments out of the house allowance. Fortunate
+for us if the library is not condemned to be cleaned twice a year. These
+beloved objects ought to deny themselves a ring, or a horse, or a gown, or
+a ball now and then, to atone for their mankind's debauchery in books; but
+do they? They ought to encourage the Bibliomania, for it keeps their
+husbands out of mischief, away from "that horrid club," and safe at home
+of evenings. The Book-Worm is always a blameless being. He never has to
+hie to Canada as a refuge. He is "absolutely pure," like all the baking
+powders.
+
+The gentle Addison, in "The Spectator," thus described a woman's library:
+"The very sound of a lady's library gave me a great curiosity to see it;
+and as it was some time before the lady came to me, I had an opportunity
+of turning over a great many of her books, which were ranged together in a
+very beautiful order. At the end of the folios (which were finely bound
+and gilt) were great jars of china placed one above another in a very
+noble piece of architecture. The quartos were separated from the octavos
+by a pile of smaller vessels, which rose in a delightful pyramid. The
+octavos were bounded by tea-dishes of all shapes, colors, and sizes, which
+were so disposed on a wooden frame that they looked like one continued
+pillar indented with the finest strokes of sculpture, and stained with the
+greatest variety of dyes. That part of the library which was designed for
+the reception of plays and pamphlets, and other loose papers, was inclosed
+in a kind of square, consisting of one of the prettiest grotesque works
+that I ever saw, and made up of scaramouches, lions, mandarins, monkeys,
+trees, shells, and a thousand other odd figures in china ware. In the
+midst of the room was a little Japan table with a quire of gilt paper upon
+it, and on the paper a silver snuff-box made in shape of a little book. I
+found there were several other counterfeit books upon the upper shelves,
+which were carved in wood, and served only to fill up the number, like
+fagots in the muster of a regiment. I was wonderfully pleased with such a
+mixed kind of furniture as seemed very suitable both to the lady and the
+scholar, and did not know at first whether I should fancy myself in a
+grotto or in a library".
+
+If so great a favorite with the fair sex could say such satirical things
+of them, I may be permitted to have my own idea of
+
+  A WOMAN'S IDEA OF A LIBRARY.
+
+  I do not care so much for books,
+    But Libraries are all the style,
+  With fine "editions de luxe"
+    One's formal callers to beguile;
+
+  With neat dwarf cases round the walls,
+    And china teapots on the top,
+  The empty shelves concealed by falls
+    Of India silk that graceful drop.
+
+  A few rare etchings greet the view,
+    Like "Harmony" and "Harvest Moon;"
+  An artist's proof on satin too
+    By what's-his-name is quite a boon.
+
+  My print called "Jupiter and Jo"
+    Is very rarely seen, but then
+  Another copy I can show
+    Inscribed with "Jupiter and 10."
+
+  A fisher boy in marble stoops
+    On pedestal in window placed,
+  And one of Rogers' lovely groups
+    Is through the long lace curtains traced.
+
+  And then I make a painting lean
+    Upon a white and gilded easel,
+  Illustrating that famous scene
+    Of Joseph Andrews and Lady Teazle.
+
+  Of course my shelves the works reveal
+    Of Plutarch, Rollin, and of Tupper,
+  While Bowdler's Shakespeare and "Lucille"
+    Quite soothe one's spirits after supper.
+
+  And when I visited dear Rome
+    I bought a lot of photographs,
+  And had them mounted here at home,
+    And though my dreadful husband laughs,
+
+  I've put them in "The Marble Faun,"
+    And envious women vainly seek
+  At Scribner's shop, from early dawn,
+    To find a volume so unique.
+
+  And monthly here, in deep surmise,
+    Minerva's bust above us frowning,
+  A club of women analyze
+    The works of Ibsen and of Browning.
+
+In the charming romance, "Realmah," the noble African prince prescribes
+monogamy to his subjects, but he allows himself three wives; one is a
+State wife, to sit by his side on the throne, help him receive
+embassadors, and preside at court dinners; another a household wife, to
+rule the kitchen and the homely affairs of the palace; the third is a
+love-wife, to be cherished in his heart and bear him children. Why would
+it not be fair to the Book-Worm to concede him a Book-wife, who should
+understand and sympathize with him in his eccentricity, and who should
+care more for rare and beautiful books than for diamonds, laces, Easter
+bonnets and ten-button gloves?
+
+In regard to women's book-clubs, a recent writer, Mr. Edward Sanford
+Martin, in "Windfalls of Observation," observes: "If a man wants to read a
+book he buys it, and if he likes it he buys six more copies and gives (not
+all the same day, of course) to six women whose intelligence he respects.
+But if a club of fifteen girls determine to read a book, do they buy
+fifteen copies? No. Do they buy five copies? No. Do they buy--No, they
+don't buy at all; they borrow a copy. It doesn't lie in womankind to spend
+money for books unless they are meant to be a gift for some man." Mr.
+Martin is a little too hard here, for I have been told of such clubs which
+sometimes bought one copy. To be sure they always bully the bookseller
+into letting them have it at cost on account of the probable benefit to
+his trade. But it is true that no normally organized woman will forego a
+dollar's worth of ribbon or gloves for a dollar's worth of book. I have
+sometimes read aloud to a number of women while they were sewing, but I do
+it no more, for just as I got to a point where you ought to be able to
+hear a pin drop, I always have heard some woman whisper, "Lend me your
+eighty cotton." A story was told me of the first meeting of a Browning
+Club in a large city in Ohio. My informant was a young lady from the East,
+who was present, and my readers can safely rely on the correctness of the
+narration. The club was composed of young ladies from sixteen to
+twenty-five years of age, all of the "first families." It was thought best
+to take an easy poem for the first meeting, and so one of them read aloud,
+"The Last Ride Together". After the reading there was a moment's
+silence, and then one observed that she would like to know whether they
+took that ride on horseback or in a "buggy." Another silence, and then an
+artless young bud ventured the remark that she thought it must have been
+in a buggy, because if it was on horseback he could not have got his arm
+around her. I once thought of sending this anecdote to Mr. Browning, but
+was warned that he was destitute of the sense of humor, especially at his
+own expense, and so desisted.
+
+  "Ah, that our wives could only see
+    How well the money is invested
+  In these old books, which seem to be
+    By them, alas! so much detested."
+
+But the wives are not always unwise in their opposition to their husband's
+book-buying. There is nothing more pitiful than to see the widow of a poor
+clergyman or lawyer trying to sell his library, and to witness her
+disappointment at the shrinkage of value which she had been taught and
+accustomed to regard as so great. A woman who has a true and wise
+sympathy with her husband's book-buying is an adored object. I recollect
+one such, who at her own suggestion gave up the largest and best room in
+her house to her husband's books, and received her callers and guests in a
+smaller one--she also received her husband's blessing.
+
+
+
+
+VIII.
+
+THE ILLUSTRATOR.
+
+
+The popular notion of the Illustrator, as the term is used by the
+Book-Worm, is that he buys many valuable books containing pictures and
+spoils them by tearing the pictures out, and from them constructs another
+valuable book with pictures. We smile to read this in the newspapers. If
+it were strictly true it would be a very reprehensible practice. But
+generally the books compelled to surrender their prints to the Illustrator
+are good for nothing else. To lament over them is as foolish as to grieve
+over the grape-skins out of which has been pressed the luscious
+Johannisburger, or to mourn over the unsightly holes which the
+porcelain-potter has made in the clay-bank. Even among Book-Worms the
+Illustrator, or the "Grangerite," as the term of reproach is, has come in
+for many hard knocks in recent years. John Hill Burton set the tune by his
+merry satire in "The Book-Hunter," in which he portrays the Grangerite
+illustrating the pious Watts' stanzas, beginning, "How doth the little
+busy bee." In his first edition Mr. Burton mentioned among "great writers
+on bees," whose portrait would be desirable, Aristarchus, meaning probably
+Aristomachus. This mistake is not corrected in the last edition, but the
+name is omitted altogether.
+
+Mr. Beverly Chew "drops into poetry" on the subject, and thus
+apostrophises the Grangerite:
+
+      "Ah, ruthless wight,
+  Think of the books you've turned to waste,
+      With patient skill."
+
+Mr. Henri Pere Du Bois thus describes the ordinary result: "Of one hundred
+books extended by the insertion of prints which were not made for them,
+ninety-nine are ruined; the hundredth book is no longer a book; it is a
+museum. An imperfect book, built with the spoils of a thousand books; a
+crazy quilt made of patches out of gowns of queens and scullions." So
+Burton compares the Grangerite to Genghis Kahn. Mr. Lang declares the
+Grangerites are "book ghouls, and brood, like the obscene demons of
+Arabian superstition, over the fragments of the mighty dead." I would like
+to show Mr. Lang how I have treated his "Letters to Dead Authors" and "Old
+Friends" by illustration. He would probably feel, with AEsop's lawyer, that
+"circumstances alter cases," although he says "no book deserves the
+honor".
+
+So a reviewer in "The Nation" stigmatises Grangerism as "a vampire art,
+maiming when it does not murder" (I did not know that vampires "maim"
+their victims) "and incapable of rising beyond canibalism" (not that they
+feed on one another, but when critics get excited their metaphors are apt
+to become mixed).
+
+"G. W. S.," of the New York "Tribune," speaks of the achievement of the
+Illustrators as "colossal vulgarities." Mr. Percy Fitzgerald observes:
+"The pitiless Grangerite slaughters a book for a few pictures, just as an
+epicure has had a sheep killed for the sweetbread".
+
+These are very choice hard words. There is much extravagance, but some
+justice in all this criticism. As a question of economics I do not find
+any great difference between a Book-worm who spends thousands of dollars
+in constructing one attractive book from several not attractive, and one
+who spends a thousand dollars in binding a book, or for an example of a
+famous old binder. If there is any difference it is in favor of the
+Grangerite, who improves the volume for the intelligent purposes of the
+reader, as against the other who merely caters to "the lust of the eye".
+
+I am willing to concede that the Grangerite is sometimes guilty of some
+gross offenses against good taste and good sense. The worst of these is
+when he extends the text of the volume itself to a larger page in order to
+embrace large prints. This is grotesque, for it spoils the very book. He
+is also blamable when he squanders valuable prints and time and patience
+on mere book lumber, such as long rows of histories; and when he stuffs
+and crams his book; and when his pictures are not of the era of the
+events or of the time of life of the persons described; and when they are
+too large or too small to be in just proportion to the printed page; and
+when the book is so heavy and cumbersome that no one can handle it with
+comfort or convenience. Above all he is blamable, in my estimation, when
+he entrusts the selection of prints to an agent. Such agency is frequently
+very unsatisfactory, and at all events the Illustrator misses the sport of
+the hunt. Few men would entrust the furnishing or decorating of a house,
+the purchase of a horse, or the selection of a wife to a third person, and
+the delicate matter of choosing prints for a book is essentially one to be
+transacted in person. The danger of any other procedure in the case of a
+wife was illustrated by Cromwell's agency for Henry Eighth in the affair
+of Anne of Cleves, the "Flanders mare."
+
+But when it is properly done, it seems to me that the very best thing the
+Book-Worm ever does is to illustrate his books, because this insures his
+reading them, at least with his fingers. Not always, for a certain
+chronicler of collections of privately illustrated books in this country
+narrates, how "relying upon the index" of a book, which he illustrated, he
+inserted a portrait of Sam Johnson, the famous, whereas "the text called
+for Sam Johnson, an eccentric dramatic writer," etc. His binder, he says,
+laughed at him for being ignorant that there "two Sam Johnsons" (there are
+four in the biographical dictionaries, one of whom was an early president
+of King's College in New York). But if done personally and conscientiously
+it is a means of valuable culture. As one of the oldest survivors of the
+genus Illustrator in this country, I have thus assumed to offer an apology
+and defense for my much berated kind. And now let me make a few
+suggestions as to what seems to me the most suitable mode of the pursuit.
+
+In illustrating there seem to be two methods, which may be described as
+the literal or realistic, and imaginative. The first consists simply in
+the insertion of portraits, views and scenes appropriate to the text. A
+pleasing variety may be imparted to this method by substituting for a mere
+portrait a scene in the life of the celebrity in question. For example,
+if Charles V. and Titian are mentioned together, it would be interesting
+to insert a picture representing the historical incident of the emperor
+picking up and handing the artist a brush which he had dropped--and one
+will have an interesting hunt to find it. But I am more an adherent of the
+romantic school, which finds excellent play in the illustration of poetry.
+For example, in the poem, "Ennui," in "The Croakers," for the line, "The
+fiend, the fiend is on me still," I found, after a search of some years, a
+picture of an imp sitting on the breast of a man in bed with the gout. In
+the same stanza are the lines, "Like a cruel cat, that sucks a child to
+death," and for this I have a print from a children's magazine, of a cat
+squatting on the breast of a child in a cradle. Now I would like "a
+Madagascar bat," which rhymes to "cat" in the poem. "And like a tom-cat
+dies by inches," is illustrated by a picture of a cat caught by the paw in
+a steel trap. "Simon" was "a gentleman of color," the favorite pastry cook
+and caterer of New York half a century ago--before the days of Mr. Ward
+McAllister. "The Croaker" advises him to "buy an eye-glass and become a
+dandy and a gentleman." This is illustrated by a rare and fine print of a
+colored gentleman, dressed in breeches, silk stockings, and ruffled shirt,
+scanning an overdressed lady of African descent through an eye-glass. "The
+ups and downs of politics" is illustrated by a Cruikshank print, the upper
+part of which shows a party making an ascension in a balloon and the lower
+part a party making a descent in a diving-bell, and entitled "the ups and
+downs of life." To illustrate the phrase, "seeing the elephant," take the
+print of Pyrrhus trying to frighten his captive, Fabricus, by suddenly
+drawing the curtains of his tent and showing him an elephant with his
+trunk raised in a baggage-smashing attitude. For "The Croakers" there are
+apt illustrations also of the following queer subjects: Korah, Dathan and
+Abiram; Miss Atropos, shut up your Scissors; Albany's two Steeples high in
+Air, Reading Cobbett's Register, Bony in His Prison Isle, Giant Wife,
+Beauty and The Beast, Fly Market, Tammany Hall, The Dove from Noah's Ark,
+Rome Saved by Geese, Caesar Offered a Crown, Caesar Crossing the Rubicon,
+Dick Ricker's Bust, Sancho in His Island Reigning, The Wisest of Wild
+Fowl, Reynold' Beer House, A Mummy, A Chimney Sweep, The Arab's Wind,
+Pygmalion, Danae, Highland Chieftain with His Tail On, Nightmare, Shaking
+Quakers, Polony's Crazy Daughter, Bubble-Blowing, First Pair of Breeches,
+Banquo's Ghost, Press Gang, Fair Lady With the Bandaged Eye, A Warrior
+Leaning on His Sword, A Warrior's Tomb, A Duel, and A Street Flirtation.
+
+As the charm of illustrating consists in the hunt for the prints, so the
+latter method is the more engrossing because the game is the more
+difficult to run down. Portraits, views and scenes are plenty, but to find
+them properly adaptable is frequently difficult. Some things which one
+would suppose readily procurable are really hard to find. For example, it
+was a weary chase to get a treadmill, and so of a drum-major, although the
+latter is now not uncommon: and although I know it exists, I have not
+attained unto a bastinado. Sirens and mermaids are rather retiring, and
+when Vedder depicted the Sea-Serpent he conferred a boon on Illustrators.
+"God's Scales," in which the mendicant weighs down the rich man, is a
+rarity. Milton leaving his card on Galileo in prison is among my wants,
+although I have seen it.
+
+As to scarce portraits, let me sing a song of
+
+  THE SHY PORTRAITS.
+
+  Oh, why do you elude me so--
+    Ye portraits that so long I've sought?
+  That somewhere ye exist, I know--
+    Indifferent, good, and good for naught.
+
+  Lucrezia, of the poisoned cup,
+    Why do you shrink away by stealth?
+  To view your "mug" with you I'd sup,
+    And even dare to drink your health.
+
+  Oh! why so coy, Godiva fair?
+    You're covered by your shining tresses,
+  And I would promise not to stare
+    At sheerest of go-diving dresses.
+
+  Come out, old Bluebeard; don't be shy!
+    You're not so bad as Froude's great hero;
+  Xantippe, fear no law gone by
+    When scolds were ducked in ponds at zero.
+
+  Not mealy-mouthed was Mrs. Behn,
+    And prudish was satiric Jane,
+  But equally they both shun men,
+    As if they bore the mark of Cain.
+
+  George Barrington, you may return
+    To country which you "left for good;"
+  Psalmanazar, I would not spurn
+    Your language when 'twas understood.
+
+  Jean Grolier, you left many books--
+    They come so dear I must ignore 'em--
+  But there's no evidence of your looks
+    For us surviving "amicorum."
+
+  This country's overrun by grangers--
+    I'm ignorant of their christian names
+  But my afflicted eyes are strangers
+    To one I want whom men call James.
+
+  There's Heber, man of many books--
+    You're far more modest than the Bishop;
+  I'm curious to learn your looks,
+    And care for nothing shown at his shop.
+
+  And oh! that wondrous, pattern child!
+    His truthfulness, no one can match it;
+  Dear little George! I'm almost wild
+    To find a wood-cut of his hatchet.
+
+  Show forth your face, Anonymous,
+    Whose name is in the books I con
+  Most frequently; so famous thus,
+    Will you not come to me anon?
+
+By way of jest I have inserted an anonymous portrait opposite an anonymous
+poem, and was once gravely asked by an absent-minded friend if it really
+was the portrait of the author. One however will probably look in vain for
+portraits of "Quatorze" and "Quinze," for which a print seller of New York
+once had an inquiry, and I have been told of a collector who returned
+Arlington because of the cut on his nose, and Ogle because of his damaged
+eye. But there is more sport in hunting for a dodo than a rabbit.
+
+It is also a pleasant thing to lay a picture occasionally in a book
+without setting out to illustrate it regularly, so that it may break upon
+one as a surprise when he takes up the book years afterward. It is a
+grateful surprise to find in Ruskin's "Modern Painters" a casual print
+from Roger's "Italy," and in Hamerton's books some sporadic etchings by
+Rembrandt or Hayden. It is like discovering an unexpected "quarter" in the
+pocket of an old waistcoat. For example, in "With Thackeray in America,"
+Mr. Eyre Crowe tells how the second number of the first edition of "The
+Newcomes" came to the author when he was in Paris, and how he found fault
+with Doyle's illustration of the games of the Charterhouse boys. He says:
+"The peccant accessory which roused the wrath of the writer was the group
+of two boys playing at marbles on the left of the spectator. 'Why,' said
+the irate author, 'they would as soon thought of cutting off their heads
+as play marbles at the Charterhouse!' This woodcut was, I noticed,
+suppressed altogether in subsequent editions." Now in my copy--not being
+the possessor of the first edition--I have made a reference to Mr. Crowe's
+passage, and supplied the suppressed cut from an early American copy which
+cost me twenty-five cents. How many of the first edition men know of the
+interesting fact narrated by Mr. Crowe? The Illustrator ought always at
+least to insert the portrait of the author whenever it has been omitted by
+the publisher.
+
+Second: What to illustrate. The Illustrator should not be an imitator or
+follower, but should strive after an unhackneyed subject. A man is not apt
+to marry the woman who flings herself at his head; he loves the
+excitement of courting; and so there is not much amusement in utilizing
+common pictures, but the charm consists in hunting for scarce ones. It is
+very natural to tread in others' tracks, and easy, because the market
+affords plenty of material for the common subjects. Shakespeare and Walton
+and Boswell's Johnson, and a few other things of that sort, have been done
+to death, and there is fairer scope in something else. Biographies of
+Painters, Elia's Essays, Sir Thomas Browne's "Religio Medici" and "Urn
+Burial," "Childe Harold," Horace, Virgil, the Life of Bayard, or of
+Vittoria Colonna, or Philip Sidney, and Sappho are charming subjects, and
+not too common. A ponderous or voluminous work lends itself less
+conveniently to the purpose than a small book in one or two volumes. Great
+quartos and folios are mere mausoleums or repositories for expensive
+prints, too huge to handle, and too extensive for any one ever to look
+through, and therefore they afford little pleasure to the owners or their
+guests. An illustrated Shakespeare in thirty volumes is theoretically a
+very grand object, but I should never have the heart to open it, and as
+for histories, I should as soon think of illustrating a dictionary. Walton
+is a lovely subject, but I would adopt a small copy and keep it within two
+or three volumes. After all there is nothing so charming as a single
+little illustrated volume, like "Ballads of Books," compiled by Brander
+Matthews; Andrew Lang's "Letters to Dead Authors," or "Old Friends,"
+Friswell's "Varia," the "Book of Death," "Melodies and Madrigals," "The
+Book of Rubies," Winter's "Shakespeare's England."
+
+A gentleman who published, a good many years ago, a monograph of privately
+illustrated books in this country, spoke of the work that I had done in
+this field, and criticised me for my "apparent want of method,"
+"eccentricity," "madness," "vagaries," "omnivorousness," and "lack of
+speciality or system," and finally, although he blamed me for having
+illustrated pretty much everything, he also blamed me for not having
+illustrated any "biographical works." This criticism seems not only
+inconsistent, but without basis, for one man may not dictate to another
+what he shall prefer to illustrate for his own amusement, any more than
+what sort of a house or pictures he shall buy or what complexion or
+stature his wife shall have. The author also did me the honor to spell my
+name wrong, and did the famous Greek amatory poet the honor of mentioning
+among my illustrated work, "Odes to Anacreon." Would that I could find
+that book!
+
+I offer these suggestions with diffidence, and with no intention to impose
+my taste upon others.
+
+If the Illustrator can get or make something absolutely unique he is a
+fortunate man. For example, I know one, stigmatized as eccentric, who has
+illustrated a printed catalogue of his own library with portraits of the
+authors, copies of prints in the books, and duplicates of engraved
+title-pages; also one who has illustrated a collection in print or in
+manuscript of his own poems; also one who has illustrated a Life of
+Hercules, written by himself, printed by one of his own family, and
+adorned with prints from antique gems and other subjects; and even a
+lawyer who has illustrated a law book written by himself, in which he has
+found place for prints so diverse and apparently out of keeping as Jonah
+and the whale, John Brown, a man pacing the floor in a nightgown with a
+crying baby, a "darkey" shot in a melon-patch, an elephant on the rampage,
+Cupid, Hudibras writing a letter, Joanna Southcote, Launce and his dog, a
+dog catching a boy going over a wall, Dr. Watts, Robinson Crusoe, Barnum
+in the form of a hum-bug, Jacob Hall the rope dancer, Lord Mayor's
+procession, Raphael discoursing to Adam, gathering sea-weed, Artemus Ward,
+a whale ashore, a barber-shop, Gilpin's ride, King Lear, St. Lawrence on
+his gridiron, Charles Lamb, Terpsichore, and a child tumbling into a well.
+The owner of such a book may be sure that it is unique, as the man was
+certain his coat of arms was genuine, because he made it himself.
+
+Third: the Illustrator should not be in a hurry.
+
+There are three singular things about the hunt for pictures. One is, the
+moment you have your book bound, no matter how many years you may have
+waited, some rare picture you wanted is sure to turn up. Hence the
+reluctance of the Illustrator to commit himself to binding, a reluctance
+only paralleled by that of the lover to marry the woman he had courted for
+ten years, because then he would have no place to spend his evenings. (I
+have had books "in hand" for twenty years).
+
+Another is, when you have found your rare picture you are pretty certain
+to find one or two duplicates. Prints, like accidents or crimes, seem to
+come in cycles and schools. I have known a man to search in vain in thirty
+print-shops in London, and coming home find what he wanted in a New York
+print-shop, and two copies at that. The third is, that you are continually
+coming very near the object without quite attaining it. Thus one may get
+Lady Godiva alone, and the effigy of Peeping Tom on the corner of an old
+house at Coventry, but to procure the whole scene is, so far as I know,
+out of the question. It would seem that Mr. Anthony Comstock has put his
+ban on it. So one will find it difficult to get "God's scales," in which
+wealth and poverty are weighed against each other, but I have had other
+scales thrust at me, such as those in which the emblems of love are
+weighed against those of religion, and a king against a beggar, but even
+the latter is not the precise thing, for in these days there are poor
+kings and rich beggars.
+
+One opinion in which all illustrators agree seems sound, and that is, that
+photographs are not to be tolerated. Photography is the most
+misrepresentative of arts. But an exception may be indulged in the case
+of those few celebrities who are too modest to allow themselves to be
+engraved, and of whom photography furnishes the only portraiture. A
+photographic copy of a rare portrait in oil is also admissible. Some also
+exclude wood-cuts. I am not such a purist as that. They are frequently the
+only means of illustrating a subject, and small and fine wood-cuts form
+charming head and tail pieces and marginal adornments. One who eschews
+wood-cuts must forego such interesting little subjects as Washington and
+his little hatchet, God's scales, the skeleton in the closet, and many of
+those which I have particularized. I flatter myself that I have made the
+margins of a good many books very interesting by means of small wood-cuts,
+of which our modern magazines provide an abundant and exquisite supply.
+These furnish a copious source of specific illustration.
+
+With their zeal illustrators are sometimes apt to be anachronistic. Every
+book ought to be illustrated in the spirit and costume of its time. The
+book should not be stuffed too full of prints; let a better proportion be
+preserved between the text and the illustrations than Falstaff observed
+between his bread and his sack. The prints should not be so numerous as to
+cause the text to be forgotten, as in the case of a tedious sermon.
+
+Probably nearly every collector expects that his treasures will be
+dispersed at his death, if not sooner. But it is a serious question to the
+illustrator, what will become of these precious objects upon which he has
+spent so much time, thought and labor, and for which he has expended so
+much money. He never cares and rarely knows, and if he knows he never
+tells, how much they have cost, but he may always be certain that they
+will never fetch their cost. Let us not indulge in any false dreams on
+this subject. The time may have been when prints were cheap and when the
+illustrator may have been able to make himself whole or even reap a
+profit, but that day I believe has gone by. One can hardly expect that
+his family will care for these things; the son generally thinks the
+Book-Worm a bore, and the wife of one's bosom and the daughter of one's
+heart usually affect more interest than they feel, and if they kept such
+objects would do so from a sense of duty alone, as the ancient Romans
+preserved the cinerary urns of their ancestors. For myself, I have often
+imagined my grandson listlessly turning over one of my favorite
+illustrated volumes, and saying, "What a funny old duffer grandad must
+have been!" Such a book-club, as the "Grolier," of New York, is a
+fortunate avenue of escape from these evils. There one might deposit at
+least some of his peculiar treasures, certain that they would receive good
+care, be regarded with permanent interest, and keep alive his memory.
+
+To augment his books by inserting prints is ordinarily just the one thing
+which the Book-Worm can do to render them in a deeper sense his own, and
+to gain for himself a peculiar proprietorship in them. Generally he cannot
+himself bind them, but by this means he may render himself a coadjutor of
+the author, and place himself on equal terms with the printer and the
+binder.
+
+After he has illustrated a favorite book once, it is an enjoyable
+occupation for the Book-Worm to do it over again, in a different spirit
+and with different pictures. "Second thoughts are best," it has been said,
+and I have more than once improved my subject by a second treatment.
+
+There is another form of illustration, of which I have not spoken, and
+that is the insertion of clippings from magazines and newspapers in the
+fly leaves. Sometimes these are of intense interest. My own Dickens,
+Thackeray and Hawthorne, in particular have their porticoes and posterms
+plentifully supplied with material of this sort. The latest contribution
+of this kind is to "Martin Chuzzlewit," and consists in the information
+that a western American "land-shark" has recently swindled people by
+selling them swamp-lots, attractively depicted on a map and named Eden.
+In my Pepys I have laid Mr. Lang's recent letter to the diarist. So on a
+fly leaf of Hawthorne's Life it is pleasing to see a cut of his little red
+house at Lenox, now destroyed by fire.
+
+
+
+
+IX.
+
+BOOK-PLATES.
+
+
+A rather modern form of book-spoliation has arisen in the collection of
+book-plates. These are literally derived "ex libris," and the business
+cannot be indulged, as a general thing, without in some sense despoiling
+books. It cannot be denied that it is a fascinating pursuit. So
+undoubtedly is the taking of watches or rings or other "articles of
+bigotry or virtue," on the highway. But somehow there is something so
+essentially personal in a book-plate, that it is hard to understand why
+other persons than the owners should become possessed by a passion for it.
+Many years ago when Burton, the great comedian, was in his prime, he used
+to act in a farce called "Toodles"--at all events, that was his name in
+the play--and he was afflicted with a wife who had a mania for attending
+auctions and buying all kinds of things, useful or useless, provided that
+they only seemed cheap. One day she came home with a door-plate,
+inscribed, "Thompson"--"Thompson with a p," as Toodles wrathfully
+described it; and this was more than Toodles could stand. He could not see
+what possible use there could ever be in that door-plate for the Toodles
+family. In those same days, there used to be displayed on the door of a
+modest house, on the east side of Broadway, in the city of New York,
+somewhere about Eighth Street, a silver door-plate inscribed, "Mr. Astor."
+This appertained to the original John Jacob. In those days I frequently
+remarked it, and thought what a prize it would be to Mrs. Toodles or some
+collector of door-plates. Now I can understand why one might acquire a
+taste for collecting book-plates of distinguished men or famous
+book-collectors, just as one collects autographs; but why collect hundreds
+and thousands of book-plates of undistinguished and even unknown persons,
+frequently consisting of nothing more than family coats-of-arms, or mere
+family names? I must confess that I share to a certain extent in Mr.
+Lang's antipathy to this species of collecting, and am disposed to call
+down on these collectors Shakespeare's curse on him who should move his
+bones. But I cannot go with Mr. Lang when he calls these well-meaning and
+by no means mischevious persons some hard names.
+
+In some localities it is quite the vogue to take off the coffin-plate from
+the coffin--all the other silver "trimmings," too, for that matter--and
+preserve it, and even have it framed and hung up in the home of the late
+lamented. There may be a sense of proprietorship in the mourners, who have
+bought and paid for it, and see no good reason for burying it, that will
+justify this practice. At all events it is a family matter. The coffin
+plate reminds the desolate survivors of the person designated, who is
+shelved forever in the dust. But what would be said of the sense or sanity
+of one who should go about collecting and framing coffin-plates,
+cataloguing them, and even exchanging them?
+
+Book-worms penetrate to different distances in books. Some go no further
+than the title page; others dig into the preface or bore into the table of
+contents; a few begin excavations at the close, to see "how it comes out."
+But that Worm is most easily satisfied who never goes beyond the inside of
+the front cover, and passes his time in prying off the book-plates.
+
+I think I have heard of persons who collect colophons. These go to work in
+the reverse direction, and are even more reprehensible than the
+accumulators of book-plates, because they inevitably ruin the book.
+
+A book-plate is appropriate, sometimes ornamental, even beautiful, in its
+intended place in the proprietor's book. Out of that, with rare
+exceptions, it strikes one like the coffin-plate, framed and hanging on
+the wall. It gives additional value and attractiveness to a book which
+one buys, but it ought to remain there.
+
+If one purchases books once owned by A, B and C--undistinguished persons,
+or even distinguished--containing their autographs, he does not cut them
+out to form a collection of autographs. If the name is not celebrated,
+the autograph has no interest or value; if famous, it has still greater
+interest and value by remaining in the book. So it seems to me it should
+be in respect to book-plates. Let Mr. Astor's door-plate stay on his
+front door, and let the energetic Mrs. Toodles content herself in buying
+something less invididual and more adaptable.
+
+A book-plate really is of no value except to the owner, as the man says of
+papers which he has lost. It cannot be utilized to mark the possessions of
+another. In this respect it is of inferior value to the door-plate, for
+possibly another Mr. Astor might arise, to whom the orignal door-plate
+might be sold. A Boston newspaper tells of a peddler of door-plates who
+contracted to sell a Salem widow a door-plate; and when she gave him her
+name to be engraved on it, gave only her surname, objecting to any first
+name or initials, observing: "I might get married again, and if my
+initials or first name were on the plate, it would be of no use. If they
+are left off, the plate could be used by my son."
+
+Thus much about collecting book-plates. One word may be tolerated about
+the character of one's own book-plate. To my taste, mere coats-of-arms
+with mottoes are not the best form. They simply denote ownership. They
+might well answer some further purpose, as for example to typify the
+peculiar tastes of the proprietor in respect to his books. A portrait of
+the owner is not objectionable, indeed is quite welcome in connection with
+some device or motto pertaining to books and not to mere family descent.
+But why, although a collector may have a favorite author, like Hawthorne
+or Thackeray, for example, should he insert his portrait in his
+book-plate, as is often done? Mr. Howells would writhe in his grave if he
+knew that somebody had stuck Thackeray's portrait or Scott's in "Silas
+Lapham," and those Calvinists who think that the "Scarlet Letter" is
+wicked, would pronounce damnation on the man who should put the gentle
+Hawthorne's portrait in a religious book. To be sure, one might have a
+variety of book-plates, with portraits appropriate to different kinds of
+books--Napoleon's for military, Calvin for religious, Walton's for angling
+and a composite portrait of Howells-James for fiction of the photographic
+school; but this would involve expense and destroy the intrinsic unity
+desirable in the book-plate. So let the portrait, if any, be either that
+of the proprietor or a conventional image. If I were to relax and allow a
+single exception it would be in favor of dear Charles Lamb's portrait in
+"Fraser's," representing him as reading a book by candle light. (For the
+moment this idea pleases me so much that I feel half inclined to eat all
+my foregoing words on this point, and adopt it for myself. At any rate, I
+hereby preempt the privilege.)
+
+I have referred to Mr. Lang's antipathy to book-plate collectors, and
+while, as I have observed, he goes to extravagant lengths in condemning
+their pursuit, still it may be of interest to my readers to know just
+what he says about them, and so I reproduce below a ballad on the subject,
+with (the material for) which he kindly supplied me when I solicited his
+mild expression of opinion on the subject:
+
+  THE SNATCHERS.
+
+  The Romans snatched the Sabine wives;
+    The crime had some extenuation,
+  For they were leading lonely lives
+    And driven to reckless desperation.
+
+  Lord Elgin stripped the Grecian frieze
+    Of all its marbles celebrated,
+  So our art-students now with ease
+    Consult the figures overrated.
+
+  Napoleon stole the southern pictures
+    And hung them up to grace the Louvre;
+  And though he could not make them fixtures,
+    They answered as an art-improver.
+
+  Bold men ransack an Egyptian tomb,
+    And with the mummies there make free;
+  Such intermeddling with Time's womb
+    May aid in archeology.
+
+  So Cruncher dug up graves in haste,
+    To sell the corpses to the doctors;
+  This trade was not against his taste,
+    Though Misses "flopped," and vowed it shocked hers.
+
+  The modern snatcher sponges leaves
+    And boards of books to crib their labels;
+  Most petty, trivial of thieves,
+    Surpassing all we read in fables.
+
+  He pastes them in a big, blank book
+    To show them to some rival fool,
+  And I pronounce him, when I look,
+    An almost idiotic ghoul.
+
+
+
+
+X.
+
+THE BOOK-AUCTIONEER.
+
+
+There is one figure that stands in a very unpleasant relation to books.
+
+If anybody has any curiosity to know what I consider the most undesirable
+occupation of mankind, I will answer candidly--that of an auctioneer of
+private libraries. It does not seem to have fallen into disrepute like
+that of the headsman or hangman, and perhaps it is as unpleasantly
+essential as that of the undertaker. But it generally thrives on the
+unhappiness of those who are compelled to part with their books, on the
+rivalries of the rich, and the strifes of the trade. It was urged
+against Mr. Cleveland, on his first canvass for the Presidency, that when
+he was sheriff he had hanged a murderer. For my own part, I admired him
+for performing that solemn office himself rather than hiring an underling
+to do it. But if he had been a book-auctioneer, I might have been
+prejudiced against him.
+
+Not so ignoble and inhuman perhaps as that of the slave-seller, still the
+business must breed a sort of callousness which is abhorrent to the genial
+Book-Worm. How I hate the glib rattle of his tongue, the mouldiness of his
+jests and the transparency of his puffery! I should think he would hate
+himself. It must be worse than acting Hamlet or Humpty Dumpty a hundred
+consecutive nights. Dante had no punishment for the Book-Worm in hell,
+if I remember right, but if he deserved any pitiless reprobation, it would
+be found in compelling him to cry off books to all eternity. Grant that
+the auctioneer is a person of sensibility and acquainted with good books,
+then his calling must give him many a pang as he observes the ignorance
+and carelessness of his audience. It is better and more fitting that he
+should know little of his wares. He ought to be well paid for his work,
+and he is--no man gets so much for mere talk except the lawyer, and
+perhaps not even he. I do not so much complain of his favoritism. When
+there is something especially desirable going, I frequently fail to catch
+his eye, and my rival gets the prize. But in this he is no worse than
+the Speaker. On the other hand he sometimes loads me up with a thing that
+I do not want, and in possession of which I would be unwilling to be found
+dead, pretending that I winked at him--a species of imposition which it is
+impolitic to resent for fear of being entirely ignored. These
+discretionary favors are regarded as a practical joke and must not be
+declined. But what I do complain of is his commercial stolidity,
+surpassing that of Charles Surface when he sold the portraits of his
+ancestors. The "bete noir" of the book trade is
+
+  THE STOLID AUCTIONEER.
+
+    Let not a sad ghost
+    From the scribbling host
+  Revisit this workaday sphere;
+    He'll find in the sequel
+    All talents are equal
+  When they come to the auctioneer.
+
+    Not a whit cares he
+    What the book may be,
+  Whether missal with glorious show,
+    A folio Shakespeare,
+    Or an Elzevir,
+  Or a Tupper, or E. P. Roe.
+
+    Without any qualms
+    He knocks down the Psalms,
+  Or the chaste Imitatio,
+    And takes the same pains
+    To enhance his gains
+  With a ribald Boccaccio.
+
+    He rattles them off,
+    Not stopping to cough,
+  He shows no distinction of person;
+    One minute's enough
+    For similar stuff
+  Like Shelley and Ossian Macpherson.
+
+    A Paradise Lost
+    Is had for less cost
+  Than a bulky "fifteener" in Greek,
+    And Addison's prose
+    Quite frequently goes
+  For a tenth of a worthless "unique."
+
+    This formula stale
+    Of his will avail
+  For an epitaph meet for his rank,
+    When dropping his gavel
+    He falls in the gravel,
+  "Do I hear nothing more?--gone--to--?
+
+I speak feelingly, but I think it is pardonable. I once went through an
+auction sale of my own books, and while I lost money on volumes on which I
+had bestowed much thought, labor and expense, I made a profit on Gibbon's
+"Decline and Fall" in tree-calf. I do not complain of the loss; what I was
+mortified by was the profit. But the auctioneer was not at all abashed; in
+fact he seemed rather pleased, and apparently regarded it as a feather in
+his cap. I have always suspected that the shameless purchaser was Silas
+Wegg.
+
+
+
+
+XI.
+
+THE BOOKSELLER.
+
+
+Considering his importance in modern civilization, it is singular that so
+little has been recorded of the Bookseller in literature. Shakespeare has
+a great deal to say of books of various kinds, but not a word, I believe,
+of the Bookseller. It is true that Ursa Major gave a mitigated growl of
+applause to the booksellers, if I recollect my Boswell right, and he
+condescended to write a life of Cave, but bookseller in his view meant
+publisher. It is true that Charles Knight wrote a book entitled "Shadows
+of the Old Booksellers," but here too the characters were mainly
+publishers, and his account of them is indeed shadowy. The chief thing
+that I recall about any of the booksellers thus celebrated is that Tom
+Davies had "a pretty wife," which is probably the reason why Doctor
+Johnson thought Tom would better have stuck to the stage. So far as I
+know, the most vivid pen-pictures of booksellers are those depicting the
+humble members of the craft, the curb-stone venders. They are much more
+picturesque than their more affluent brethren who are used to the luxury
+of a roof.
+
+
+    Rummaging over the contents of an old stall, at a half book, half old
+    iron shop in Ninety-four alley, leading from Wardour street to Soho,
+    yesterday, I lit upon a ragged duodecimo, which has been the strange
+    delight of my infancy; the price demanded was sixpence, which the
+    owner (a little squab duodecimo of a character himself) enforced with
+    the assurance that his own mother should not have it for a farthing
+    less. On my demurring to this extraordinary assertion, the dirty
+    little vender reinforced his assertion with a sort of oath, which
+    seemed more than the occasion demanded. "And now," said he, "I have
+    put my soul to it." Pressed by so solemn an asseveration, I could no
+    longer resist a demand which seemed to set me, however unworthy, upon
+    a level with his nearest relations; and depositing a tester, I bore
+    away the battered prize in triumph.
+
+    --Essays of Elia.
+
+
+Monsieur Uzanne, who has treated of the elegancies of the Fan, the Muff,
+and the Umbrella, has more recently given the world a quite unique series
+of studies among the bookstalls and the quays of Paris--"The Book Hunter
+in Paris"--and this too one finds more entertaining than any account of
+Quaritch's or Putnam's shop would be.
+
+I must bear witness to the honesty and liberality of booksellers. When one
+considers the hundreds of catalogues from which he has ordered books at a
+venture, even from across the ocean, and how seldom he has been misled or
+disappointed in the result, one cannot subscribe to a belief in the dogma
+of total depravity. I remember some of my booksellers with positive
+affection. They were such self-denying men to consent to part with their
+treasures at any price. And as a rule they are far more careless than
+ordinary merchants about getting or securing their pay. To be sure it is
+rather ignoble for the painter of a picture, or the chiseller of a statue,
+or the vender of a fine book, to affect the acuteness of tradesmen in the
+matter of compensation. The excellent bookseller takes it for granted, if
+he stoops to think about it, that if a man orders a Caxton or a Grolier he
+will pay for it, at his convenience. It was this unthinking liberality
+which led a New York bookseller to give credit to a distinguished
+person--afterwards a candidate for the Presidency--to a considerable
+amount, and to let the account stand until it was outlawed, and his
+sensibilities were greviously shocked, when being compelled to sue for his
+due, his debtor pleaded the statute of limitations! His faith was not
+restored even when the acute buyer left a great sum of money by his will
+to found a public library, and the legacy failed through informality.
+
+I have only one complaint to make against booksellers. They should teach
+their clerks to recognize The Book-Worm at a glance. It is very
+annoying, when I go browsing around a book-shop, to have an attendant come
+up and ask me, who have bought books for thirty years, if he can "show me
+anything"--just as if I wanted to see anything in particular--or if
+"anybody is waiting on me"--when all I desire is to be let alone. Some
+booksellers, I am convinced, have this art of recognition, for they let me
+alone, and I make it a rule always to buy something of them, but never
+when their employees are so annoyingly attentive. I do not object to being
+watched; it is only the implication that I need any assistance that
+offends me. It is easy to recognize the Book-Worm at a glance by the care
+with which he handles the rare books and the indifference with which he
+passes the standard authors in holiday bindings.
+
+Once I had a bookseller who had a talent for drawing, which he used to
+exercise occasionally on the exterior of an express package of books. One
+of these wrappings I have preserved, exhibiting a pen-and-ink drawing of a
+war-ship firing a big gun at a few small birds. Perhaps this was
+satirically intended to denote the pains and time he had expended on so
+small a sale. But I will now immortalize him.
+
+The most striking picture of a bookseller that I recall in all literature
+is one drawn by M. Uzanne, in the charming book mentioned above, which I
+will endeavor to transmute and transmit under the title of
+
+  THE PROPHETIC BOOK.
+
+  "La Croix," said the Emperor, "cease to beguile;
+    These bookstalls must go from my bridges and quays;
+  No longer shall tradesmen my city defile
+    With mouldering hideous scarecrows like these."
+
+  While walking that night with the bibliophile,
+    On the Quai Malaquais by the Rue de Saints Peres,
+  The Emperor saw, with satirical smile,
+    Enkindling his stove, in the chill evening air,
+
+  With leaves which he tore from a tome by his side,
+    A bookseller ancient, with tremulous hands;
+  And laying aside his imperial pride,
+    "What book are you burning?" the Emperor demands.
+
+  For answer Pere Foy handed over the book,
+    And there as the headlines saluted his glance,
+  Napoleon read, with a stupefied look,
+    "Account of the Conquests and Victories of France."
+
+  The dreamer imperial swallowed his ire;
+    Pere Foy still remained at his musty old stand,
+  Till France was environed by sword and by fire,
+    And Germans like locusts devoured the land.
+
+Doubtless the occupation of bookseller is generally regarded as a very
+pleasant as well as a refined one. But there is another side, in the
+estimation of a true Book-Worm, and it is not agreeable to him to
+contemplate the life of
+
+  THE BOOK-SELLER.
+
+  He stands surrounded by rare tomes
+  Which find with him their transient homes,
+    He knows their fragrant covers;
+  He keeps them but a week or two,
+  Surrenders then their charming view
+    To bibliomaniac lovers.
+
+  An enviable man, you say,
+  To own such wares if but a day,
+    And handle, see and smell;
+  But all the time his spirit shrinks,
+  As wandering through his shop he thinks
+    He only keeps to sell.
+
+  The man who buys from him retains
+  His purchase long as life remains,
+    And then he doesn't mind
+  If his unbookish eager heirs,
+  Administering his affairs,
+    Shall throw them to the wind.
+
+  Or if in life he sells, in sooth,
+  'Tis parting with a single tooth,
+    A momentary pain;
+  Booksellers, like Sir Walter's Jew,
+  Must this keen suffering renew,
+    Again and yet again.
+
+  And so we need not envy him
+  Who sells us books, for stark and grim
+    Remains this torture deep.
+  This Universalistic hell--
+  Throughout this life he's bound to sell;
+    He has, but cannot keep.
+
+
+
+
+XII.
+
+THE PUBLIC LIBRARIAN.
+
+
+There is one species of the Book-Worm which is more pitiable than the
+Bookseller, and that is the Public Librarian, especially of a circulating
+library. He is condemned to live among great collections of books and
+exhibit them to the curious public, and to be debarred from any
+proprietorship in them, even temporary. But the greater part this does not
+grieve a true Book-Worm, for he would scorn ownership of a vast majority
+of the books which he shows, but on the comparatively rare occasions when
+he is called on to produce a real book (in the sense of Bibliomania), he
+must be saddened by the reflection that it is not his own, and that the
+inspection of it is demanded of him as a matter of right. I have often
+observed the ill concealed reluctance with which the librarian complies
+with such a request; how he looks at the demandant with a degree of
+surprise, and then produces the key of the repository where the treasure
+is kept under guard, and heaving a sigh delivers the volume with a
+grudging hand. It was this characteristic which led me in my youth, before
+I had been inducted into the delights of Bibliomania and had learned to
+appreciate the feelings of a librarian, to define him as one who
+conceives it to be his duty to prevent the public from seeing the books. I
+owe a good old librarian an apology for having said this of him, and
+hereby offer my excuses to one whose honorable name is recorded in the
+Book of Life. Much is to be forgiven to the man who loves books, and yet
+is doomed to deal out books that perish in the using, which no human being
+would ever read a second time nor "be found dead with." These are the true
+tests of a good book, especially the last. Shelley died with a little
+AEschylus on his person, which the cruel waves spared, and when Tennyson
+fell asleep it was with a Shakespeare, open at "Cymbeline." One may be
+excused for reading a good deal that he never would re-read, but not for
+owning it, nor for owning a good deal which he would feel ashamed to have
+for his last earthly companion. But now for my tribute to
+
+  THE PUBLIC LIBRARIAN.
+
+  His books extend on every side,
+  And up and down the vistas wide
+      His eye can take them in;
+  He does not love these books at all,
+  Their usefulness in big and small
+      He counts as but a sin.
+
+  And all day long he stands to serve
+  The public with an aching nerve;
+      He views them with disdain--
+  The student with his huge round glasses,
+  The maiden fresh from high school classes,
+      With apathetic brain;
+
+  The sentimental woman lorn,
+  The farmer recent from his corn,
+      The boy who thirsts for fun,
+  The graybeard with a patent-right,
+  The pedagogue of school at night,
+      The fiction-gulping one.
+
+  They ask for histories, reports,
+  Accounts of turf and prize-ring sports,
+      The census of the nation;
+  Philosophy and science too,
+  The fresh romances not a few,
+      Also "Degeneration."
+
+  "They call these books!" he said, and throws
+  Them down in careless heaps and rows
+      Before the ticket-holder;
+  He'd like to cast them at his head,
+  He wishes they might strike him dead,
+      And with the reader moulder.
+
+  But now as for the shrine of saint
+  He seeks a spot whence sweet and faint
+      A leathery smell exudes,
+  And there behind the gilded wires
+  For some loved rarity inquires
+      Which common gaze eludes.
+
+  He wishes Omar would return
+  That vulgar mob of books to burn,
+      While he, like Virgil's hero,
+  Would shoulder off this precious case
+  To some secluded private place
+      With temperature at zero.
+
+  And there in that Seraglio
+  Of books not kept for public show,
+      He'd feast his glowing eyes,
+  Forgetting that these beauties rare,
+  Morocco-clad and passing fair,
+      Are but the Sultan's prize.
+
+  But then a tantalizing sense
+  Invades expectancy intense,
+      And with extorted moan,
+  "Unhappy man!" he sighs, "condemned
+  To show such treasure and to lend--
+      I keep, but cannot own!"
+
+
+
+
+XIII.
+
+DOES BOOK COLLECTING PAY.
+
+
+We now come to the sordid but serious consideration whether books are a
+"good investment" in the financial sense. The mind of every true
+Book-Worm should revolt from this question, for none except a bookseller
+is pardonable for buying books with the design of selling them.
+Booksellers are a necessary evil, as purveyors for the Book-Worm. I
+regard them as the old woman regarded the thirty-nine articles of faith;
+when inquired of by her bishop what she thought of them, she said, "I
+don't know as I've anything against them." So I don't know that I have
+anything against booksellers, although I must concede that they generally
+have something against me. As no well regulated man ever grudges expense
+on the house that forms his home, or on its adornment, and rarely cares or
+even reflects whether he can get his money back, so it is with the true
+bibliomaniac. He never intends to part with his books any more than with
+his homestead. Then again the use and enjoyment of books ought to count
+for something like interest on the capital invested. Many times, directly
+or indirectly, the use of a library is worth even more than the interest
+on the outlay. It is singular how expenditure in books is regarded as an
+extravagance by the business world. One may spend the price of a fine
+library in fast or showy horses, or in travel, or in gluttony, or in stock
+speculations eventuating on the wrong side of his ledger, and the
+money-grubbing community think none the worse of him. But let him expend
+annually a few thousands in books, and these sons of Mammon pull long
+faces, wag their shallow heads, and sneeringly observe, "screw loose
+somewhere," "never get half what he has paid for them," "too much of a
+Book-Worm to be a sharp business man." A man who boldly bets on stocks in
+Wall Street is a gallant fellow, forsooth, and excites the admiration of
+the business community (especially of those who thrive on his losses) even
+when he "comes out at the little end of the horn." As Ruskin observes, we
+frequently hear of a bibliomaniac, never of a horse-maniac. It is said
+there is a private stable in Syracuse, New York, which has cost several
+hundred thousand dollars. The owner is regarded as perfectly sane and the
+building is viewed with great pride by the public, but if the owner had
+expended as much on a private library his neighbors would have thought him
+a lunatic. If a man in business wants to excite the suspicion of the sleek
+gentlemen who sit around the discount board with him, or yell like
+lunatics at the stock exchange with him, or talk with him about the tariff
+or free silver, or any other subject on which no two men ever agree unless
+it is for their interest, let it leak out that he has put a few thousand
+dollars into a Mazarine Bible, or a Caxton, or a first folio Shakespeare
+or some other rare book. No matter if he can afford it, most of his
+associates regard him as they do a Bedlamite who goes about collecting
+straws. Fortunate is he if his wife does not privately call on the family
+attorney and advise with him about putting a committee over the poor man.
+
+But if we must regard book-buying in a money sense, and were to admit that
+books never sell for as much as they cost, it is no worse in respect to
+books than in respect to any other species of personal property. What
+chattel is there for which the buyer can get as much as he paid, even the
+next day? When it is proposed to transform the seller himself into the
+buyer of the same article, we find that the bull of yesterday is converted
+into the bear of to-day. Circumstances alter cases. I have bought a good
+many books and "objects of bigotry and virtue," and have sold some, and
+the nearest I ever came to getting as much as I paid was in the case of a
+rare print, the seller of which, after the lapse of several years,
+solicited me to let him have it again, at exactly what I paid for it, in
+order that he might sell it to some one else at an advance. I declined his
+offer with profuse thanks, and keep the picture as a curiosity.
+
+So I should say, as a rule, that books are not a good financial investment
+in the business sense, and speaking of most books and most buyers. Give
+a man the same experience in buying books that renders him expert in
+buying other personal property, the mere gross objects of trade, and let
+him set out with the purpose of accumulating a library that shall be a
+remunerative financial investment, and he may succeed, indeed, has often
+succeeded, certainly to the extent of getting back his outlay with
+interest, and sometimes making a handsome profit. But this needs
+experience. Just as one must build at least two houses before he can
+exactly suit himself, so he must collect two libraries before he can get
+one that will prove a fair investment in the vulgar sense of trade.
+
+I dare say that one will frequently pay more for a fine microscope or
+telescope than he can ever obtain for it if he desires or is pressed to
+sell it, but who would or should stop to think of that? The power of
+prying into the mysteries of the earth and the wonders of the heavens
+should raise one's thoughts above such petty considerations. So it should
+be in buying that which enables one to converse with Shakespeare or Milton
+or scan the works of Raphael or Durer. When the pioneer on the western
+plains purchases an expensive rifle he does not inquire whether he can
+sell it for what it costs; his purpose is to defend his house against
+Indians and other wild beasts. So the true book-buyer buys books to fight
+weariness, disgust, sorrow and despair; to loose himself from the world
+and forget time and all its limitations and besetments. In this view they
+never cost too much. And so when asked if book-collecting pays, I retort
+by asking, does piety pay? "Honesty is the best policy" is the meanest of
+maxims. Honesty ought to be a principle and not a policy; and
+book-collecting ought to be a means of education, refinement and
+enjoyment, and not a mode of financial investment.
+
+
+
+
+XIV.
+
+THE BOOK-WORM'S FAULTS.
+
+
+This is not a case of "Snakes in Iceland," for the Book-Worm has faults.
+One of his faults is his proneness to regard books as mere merchandise and
+not as vehicles of intellectual profit, that is to say, to be read. Too
+many collectors buy books simply for their rarity and with too little
+regard to the value of their contents. The Circassian slave-dealer does
+not care whether his girls can talk sense or not, and too many men buy
+books with a similar disregard to their capacity for instructing or
+entertaining. It seems to me that a man who buys books which he does not
+read, and especially such as he cannot read, merely on account of their
+value as merchandise, degrades the noble passion of bibliomania to the
+level of a trade. When I go through such a library I think of what
+Christ said to the traders in the Temple. Another fault is his lack of
+independence and his tendency to imitate the recognized leaders. He is too
+prone to buy certain books simply because another has them, and thus even
+rare collections are apt to fall into a tiresome routine. The collector
+who has a hobby and independence to ride it is admirable. Let him addict
+himself to some particular subject or era or "ana," and try to exhaust it,
+and before he is conscious he will have accumulated a collection precious
+for its very singularity. It strikes me that the best example of this
+idea that I have ever heard of is the attempt, in which two collectors in
+this country are engaged, to acquire the first or at least one specimen of
+every one of the five hundred fifteenth century printers. If this should
+ever succeed, the great libraries of all the world would be eager for it,
+and the undertaking is sufficiently arduous to last a lifetime.
+
+Sometimes out of this fault, sometimes independently of it, arises the
+fault by which book collecting degenerates into mere rivalry--the vulgar
+desire of display and ambition for a larger or rarer or costlier
+accumulation than one's neighbor has. The determination not to be
+outdone does not lend dignity or worth to the pursuit which would
+otherwise be commendable. During the late civil war in this country the
+chaplain of a regiment informed his colonel, who was not a godly person,
+that there was a hopeful revival of religion going on in a neighboring and
+rival regiment, and that forty men had been converted and baptized.
+"Dashed if I will submit to that," said the swearing colonel: "Adjutant,
+detail fifty men for baptism instantly!" So Mr. Roe, hearing that Mr. Doe
+has acquired a Caxton or other rarity of a certain height, and absolutely
+flawless except that the corners of the last leaf have been skillfully
+mended and that six leaves are slightly foxed, cannot rest night or day
+for envy, but is like the troubled sea until he can find a copy a
+sixteenth of an inch taller, the corners of whose leaves are in their
+pristine integrity, and over whose brilliant surface the smudge of the fox
+has not been cast, and then how high is his exaltation! Not that he cares
+anything for the book intrinsically, but he glories in having beaten
+Doe. Now if any speaks to him of Doe's remarkable copy, he can draw out
+his own and create a surprise in the bosom of Doe's adherent. The laurels
+of Miltiades no longer deprive him of rest. He has overcome in this
+trivial and childish strife concerning size and condition, and he holds
+the champion's belt for the present. He not only feels big himself but he
+has succeeded in making Doe feel small, which is still better. I don't
+know whether there will be any book-collecting in Mr. Bellamy's Utopia,
+but if there is, it will not be disfigured by such meanness, but
+collectors will go about striving to induce others to accept their
+superior copies and everything will be as lovely as in Heine's heaven,
+where geese fly around ready cooked, and if one treads on your corn it
+conveys a sensation of exquisite delight.
+
+It has been several times remarked by moralists that human nature is
+selfish. One of course does not expect another to relinquish to him his
+place in a "queue" at a box-office or his turn at a barber's shop, but in
+the noble and elegant pursuit of book-collecting it would be well to
+emulate the politeness of the French at Fontenoy, and hat in hand offer
+our antagonist the first shot. But I believe the only place where the
+Book-Worm ever does that is the auction room.
+
+
+    I no sooner come into the library, but I bolt the door to me,
+    excluding lust, ambition, avarice, and all such vices, whose nurse is
+    idleness, the mother of ignorance, and melancholy herself, and in the
+    very lap of eternity, among so many divine souls, I take my seat with
+    so lofty a spirit and sweet content, that I pity all our great ones
+    and rich men that know not this happiness.
+
+    --Heinsius.
+
+
+The modern Book-Worm is not the simple and absent-minded creature who went
+by this name a century ago or more. He is no mere antiquarian, Dryasdust
+or Dominie Sampson, but he is a sharp merchant, or a relentless broker, or
+a professional railroad wrecker, or a keen lawyer, or a busy physician, or
+a great manufacturer--a wide awake man of affairs, quite devoid of the
+conventional innocency and credulity which formerly made the name of
+Book-Worm suggestive of a necessity for a guardian or a committee in
+lunacy. No longer does he inquire, as Becatello inquired of Alphonso,
+King of Naples, which had done the better--Poggius, who sold a Livy,
+fairly writ in his own hand, to buy a country home near Florence, or he,
+who to buy a Livy had sold a piece of land? No longer is the scale turned
+in the negotiation of a treaty between princes by the weight of a rare
+book, as when Cosimo dei Medici persuaded King Alphonso of Naples to a
+peace by sending him a codex of Livy. No longer does the Book-Worm sit in
+his modest book-room, absorbed in his adored volumes, heedless of the
+waning lamp and the setting star, of hunger and thirst, unmindful of the
+scent of the clover wafted in at the window, deaf to the hum of the bees
+and the low of the kine, blind to the glow of sunsets and the soft contour
+of the blue hills, and the billowy swaying of the wheat field before the
+gentle breath of the south. No longer can it be said that
+
+  THE BOOK-WORM DOES NOT CARE FOR NATURE.
+
+  I feel no need of nature's flowers--
+    Of flowers of rhetoric I have store;
+  I do not miss the balmy showers--
+    When books are dry I o'er them pore.
+
+  Why should I sit upon a stile
+    And cause my aged bones to ache,
+  When I can all the hours beguile
+    With any style that I would take?
+
+  Why should I haunt a purling stream,
+    Or fish in miasmatic brook?
+  O'er Euclid's angles I can dream,
+    And recreation find in Hook.
+
+  Why should I jolt upon a horse
+    And after wretched vermin roam,
+  When I can choose an easier course
+    With Fox and Hare and Hunt at home?
+
+  Why should I scratch my precious skin
+    By crawling through a hawthorne hedge,
+  When Hawthorne, raking up my sin,
+    Stands tempting on the nearest ledge?
+
+  No need that I should take the trouble
+    To go abroad to walk or ride,
+  For I can sit at home and double
+    Quite up with pain from Akenside.
+
+The modern Book-Worm deals in sums of six figures; he keeps an agent "on
+the other side;" he cables his demands and his decisions; his name
+flutters the dovecotes in the auction-room; to him is proffered the first
+chance at a rarity worth a King's ransom; too busy to potter in person
+with such a trifle as the purchase of a Mazarine Bible, he hires others to
+do the hunting and he merely receives the game; the tiger skin and the
+elephant's tusk are laid at his feet to order, but he misses all the joy
+and ardor of the hunt. How different is all this from Sir Thomas
+Urquhart's account of his own library, of which he says: "There were not
+three works therein which were not of mine own purchase, and all of them
+together, in the order wherein I had ranked them, compiled like to a
+complete nosegay of flowers, which in my travels I had gathered out of the
+gardens of sixteen several kingdoms."
+
+Another fault of the Book-Worm is the affectation of collecting books on
+subjects in which he takes no practical interest, simply because it is the
+fashion or the books are intrinsically beautiful. Many a man has a fine
+collection on Angling, for example, who hardly knows how to put a worm on
+a hook, much less attach a fly. I fear I am one of these hypocritical
+creatures, for this is
+
+  HOW I GO A-FISHING.
+
+  Tis sweet to sit in shady nook,
+  Or wade in rapid crystal brook,
+  Impervious in rubber boots,
+  And wary of the slippery roots,
+  To snare the swift evasive trout
+  Or eke the sauntering horn-pout;
+  Or in the cold Canadian river
+  To see the glorious salmon quiver,
+  And them with tempting hook inveigle,
+  Fit viand for a table regal;
+  Or after an exciting bout
+  To snatch the pike with sharpened snout;
+  Or with some patient ass to row
+  To troll for bass with motion slow.
+  Oh! joy supreme when they appear
+  Splashing above the water clear,
+  And drawn reluctantly to land
+  Lie gasping on the yellow sand!
+  But sweeter far to read the books
+  That treat of flies and worms and hooks,
+  From Pickering's monumental page,
+  (Late rivalled by the rare Dean Sage),
+  And Major's elder issues neat,
+  To Burnand's funny "Incompleat."
+  I love their figures quaint and queer,
+  Which on the inviting page appear,
+  From those of good Dame Juliana,
+  Who lifts a fish and cries hosanna,
+  To those of Stothard, graceful Quaker,
+  Of fishy art supremest maker,
+  Whose fisherman, so dry and neat,
+  Would never soil a parlor seat.
+  I love them all, the books on angling,
+  And far from cares and business jangling,
+  Ensconced in cosy chimney-corner,
+  Like the traditional Jack Horner,
+  I read from Walton down to Lang,
+  And hum that song the Milkmaid sang.
+  I get not tired nor wet nor cross,
+  Nor suffer monetary loss--
+  If fish are shy and will not bite,
+  And shun the snare laid in their sight--
+  In order home at night to bring
+  A fraudulent, deceitful string,
+  And thus escape the merry jeers
+  Of heartless piscatory peers;
+  Nor have to listen to the lying
+  Of fishermen while fish are frying,
+  Who boast of draughts miraculous
+  Which prove too large a draught on us.
+  I spare the rod, and rods don't break;
+  Nor fish in sight the hook forsake;
+  My lines ne'er snap like corset laces;
+  My lines are fallen in pleasant places.
+  And so in sage experience ripe,
+  My fishery is but a type.
+
+
+
+
+XV.
+
+POVERTY AS A MEANS OF ENJOYMENT IN COLLECTING.
+
+
+Poor collectors are not only not at a disadvantage in enjoyment, but they
+have a positive advantage over affluent rivals. If I were rich, probably I
+should not throw my money away just to experience this superiority, but it
+nevertheless exists. I do not envy, but I commiserate my brother collector
+who has plenty of money. He who only has to draw his check to obtain his
+desire fails to reach the keenest bliss of the pursuit. If diamonds were
+as common as cobble stones there would be no delight in picking them up.
+
+To constitute a bibliomaniac in the true sense, the love of books must
+combine with a certain limitation of means for the gratification of the
+appetite. The consciousness of some extravagance must be always present
+in his mind; there must be a sense of sacrifice in the attainment; in a
+rich man the disease cannot exist; he cannot enter the kingdom of the
+Bibliomaniac's heaven. There is the same difference of sensation between
+the acquirement of books by a wealthy man and by him of slender purse,
+that there is between the taking of fish in a net and the successful
+result of a long angling pursuit after one especially fat and evasive
+trout. When a prince kills his preserved game, with keepers to raise it
+for him and to hand him guns ready loaded, so that all he has to do is to
+squint and pull the trigger, this is not hunting; it is mere vulgar
+butchery. What knows he of the joys of the tramper in the forest, who
+stalks the deer, or scares up smaller game, singly, and has to work hard
+for his bag? We read in Dibdin's sumptuous pages of the celebrated contest
+between the Duke of Devonshire and the Marquis of Blandford for the
+possession of the Valdarfar Decameron; we read with admiration, but we
+also read of the immortal battle of Elia with the little squab-keeper of
+the old book-stall in Ninety-four alley, over the ownership of a ragged
+duodecimo for a sixpence; we read with affection. So we read Leigh
+Hunt's confession that when he "cut open a new catalogue of old books, and
+put crosses against dozens of volumes in the list, out of the pure
+imagination of buying them, the possibility being out of the question."
+Poverty hath her victories no less renowned than wealth. To haunt the
+book-stores, there to see a long-desired work in luxurious and tempting
+style, reluctantly to abandon it for the present on account of the price;
+to go home and dream about it, to wonder, for a year, and perchance
+longer, whether it will ever again greet your eyes; to conjecture what act
+of desperation you might in heat of passion commit toward some more
+affluent man in whose possession you should thereafter find it; to see it
+turn up again in another book-shop, its charms slightly faded, but yet
+mellowed by age, like those of your first love, met in later life--with
+this difference, however, that whereas you crave those of the book more
+than ever, you are generally quite satisfied with yourself for not having,
+through the greenness of youth, yielded untimely to those of the lady; to
+ask with assumed indifference the price, and learn with ill-dissembled joy
+that it is now within your means; to say you'll take it; to place it
+beneath your arm, and pay for it (or more generally order it "charged");
+to go forth from that room with feelings akin to those of Ulysses when he
+brought away the Palladium from Troy; to keep a watchful eye on the parcel
+in the railway coach on your way home, or to gloat over the treasures of
+its pages, and wonder if the other passengers have any suspicion of your
+good fortune; and finally to place the volume on your shelf, and
+thenceforth to call it your own--this is indeed a pleasure denied to the
+affluent, so keen as to be akin to pain, and only marred by the palling
+which always follows possession and the presentation of your book-seller's
+account three months afterwards.
+
+
+
+
+XVI.
+
+THE ARRANGEMENT OF BOOKS.
+
+
+There was a time when I loved to see my books arranged with a view to
+uniformity of height and harmony of color without respect to subjects.
+That time I regard as my vealy period. That was the time when we admired
+"Somnambula," and when the housewife used to have all the pictures hung on
+the same level, and to buy vases in pairs exactly alike and put them on
+either side of the parlor clock, which was generally surmounted by a
+prancing Saracen or a weaving Penelope. Granting that a collection is not
+extensive enough to demand a strict arrangement by subjects, I like to see
+a little artistic confusion--high and low together here and there, like a
+democratic community; now and then some giants laid down on their sides to
+rest; the shelves not uniformly filled out as if the owner never expected
+to buy any more, and alongside a dainty Angler a book in red or blue cloth
+with a white label--just as childred in velvet and furs sit next a
+newsboy, or a little girl in calico with a pigtail at Sunday School, or as
+beggars and princes kneel side by side on the cathedral pavement. It is
+good to have these "swell" books rub up against the commoners, which
+though not so elegant are frequently a great deal brighter. At a country
+funeral I once heard the undertaker say to the bearers, "size yourselves
+off." There is no necessity or artistic gain in such a ceremony in a
+library, and a departure from stiff uniformity is quite agreeable. Then
+I do not care to have the book cases all of the same height, nor even of
+the same kind of wood, nor to have them all "dwarfs," with bric-a-brac on
+the top. I would rather have more books on top. In short, it is pleasant
+to have the collection remind one in a way of Topsy--not that it was
+"born," but "growed" and is expected to grow more. There is a modern
+notion of considering a library as a room rather than as a collection of
+books, and of making the front drawing-room the library, which is
+heretical in the eyes of a true Book-Worm. This is probably an invention
+of the women of the house to prevent any additions to the books without
+their knowledge, and to discourage book-buying. We have surrendered too
+much to our wives in this; they demand book cases as furniture and to
+serve as shelves, without any regard to the interior contents or whether
+there are any, except for the color of the bindings and the regularity of
+the rows. All of us have thus seen "libraries" without books worthy the
+name, and book-cases sometimes with exquisite silk curtains, carefully and
+closely drawn, arousing the suspicion that there were no books behind
+them. My ideal library is a room given up to books, all by itself, at
+the top or in the rear of the house, where "company" cannot break through
+and say to me, "I know you are a great man to buy books--have you seen
+that beautiful limited holiday edition of Ben Hur, with illustrations?"
+
+
+
+
+XVII.
+
+ENEMIES OF BOOKS.
+
+
+Mr. Blades regards as "Enemies of Books" fire, water, gas, heat, dust and
+neglect, ignorance and bigotry, the worm, beetles, bugs and rats,
+book-binders, collectors, servants and children. He does not include
+women, borrowers, or thieves. Perhaps he considers them rather as enemies
+of the book-owners. The worm is not always to be considered an enemy to
+authors, although he may be to books. James Payn, in speaking of the
+recent discovery, in the British Museum, of a copy on papyrus of the
+humorous poems of the obscure Greek poet, Herodles, says: "The humorous
+poems of Herodles possess, however, the immense advantage of being
+'seriously mutilated by worms'; wherever therefore an hiatus occurs, the
+charitable and cultured mind will be enabled to conclude that (as in the
+case of a second descent upon a ball supper) the 'best things' have been
+already devoured." It was doubtless to guard against thieves that the
+ancient books were chained up in the monasteries, but the practice was
+effectual also against borrowers. De Bury, in his "Philobiblon" has a
+chapter entitled "A Provident Arrangement by which his Books may be lent
+to Strangers," in which the utmost leniency is to lend duplicate books
+upon ample security. Not to adopt the harsh judgment of an ancient
+author, who says, "to lend a book is to lose it, and borrowing but a
+hypocritical pretense for stealing," we may conclude, in a word, that to
+lend a book is like the Presidency of the United States, to be neither
+desired nor refused. Collectors are not so much exposed to the ravages of
+thieves as book-sellers are, and a book-thief ought to be regarded with
+leniency for his good taste and his reliance on the existence of culture
+in others. After all, it is one's own fault if he lends a book. One
+should as soon think of lending one of his children, unless he has
+duplicate or triplicate daughters. It would be difficult to foretell what
+would happen to a man who should propose to borrow a rare book. Perhaps
+death by freezing would be the safest prediction. Although Grolier stamped
+"et amicorum" on his books, that did not mean that he would lend them, but
+only that his friends were free of them at his house. It is amusing to
+note, in Mr. Castle's monograph on Book-Plates, how many of them indicate
+a stern purpose not to lend books. Mr. Gosse regards book-plates as a
+precaution not only against thieves, but against borrowers. He observes of
+the man who does not adopt a book-plate: "Such a man is liable to great
+temptations. He is brought face to face with that enemy of his species,
+the borrower, and does not speak with him in the gate. If he had a
+book-plate he would say, 'Oh! certainly I will lend you this volume, if it
+has not my book-plate in it; of course one makes it a rule never to lend
+a book that has.' He would say this and feign to look inside the volume,
+knowing right well that this safeguard against the borrower is there
+already." One may make a gift of a book to a friend, but there is as much
+difference between giving a book and lending one as there is between
+indorsing a note and giving the money. I have considerable respect for and
+sympathy with a good honest book-thief. He holds out no false hopes and
+makes no false pretences. But the borrower who does not return adds
+hypocrisy and false pretences to other crime. He ought to be committed to
+the State prison for life, and put at keeping the books of the
+institution. In a buried temple in Cnidos, in 1857, Mr. Newton found rolls
+of lead hung up, on which were inscribed spells devoting enemies to the
+infernal gods for sundry specified offenses, among which was the failure
+to return a borrowed garment. On which Agnes Repplier says: "Would that
+it were given to me now to inscribe, and by inscribing doom, all those who
+have borrowed and failed to return our books; would that by scribbling
+some strong language on a piece of lead we could avenge the lamentable
+gaps on our shelves, and send the ghosts of the wrong-doers howling
+dismally into the eternal shades of Tartarus."
+
+I have spoken of a certain amount of sympathy as due from a magnanimous
+book-owner toward a pilferer of such wares. This is always on the
+condition that he steals to add to his own hoard and not for mere
+pecuniary gain. The following is suggested as a Christian mode of dealing
+with
+
+  THE BOOK-THIEF.
+
+      Ah, gentle thief!
+  I marked the absent-minded air
+  With which you tucked away my rare
+      Book in your pocket.
+
+      'Twas past belief--
+  I saw you near the open case,
+  But yours was such an honest face
+      I did not lock it.
+
+      I knew you lacked
+  That one to make your set complete,
+  And when that book you chanced to meet
+      You recognized it.
+
+      And when attacked
+  By rage of bibliophilic greed,
+  You prigged that small Quantin Ovide,
+      Although I prized it.
+
+      I will not sue,
+  Nor bring your family to shame
+  By giving up your honored name
+      To heartless prattle.
+
+      I'll visit you,
+  And under your unwary eyes
+  Secrete and carry off the prize,
+      My ravished chattel.
+
+It greatly rejoices me to observe that Mr. Blades does not include tobacco
+among the enemies of books. In one sense tobacco may be ranked as a
+book-enemy, for self-denial in this regard may furnish a man with a good
+library in a few years. I have known a very pretty collection made out of
+the ordinary smoke-offerings of twenty years. Undoubtedly there are
+libraries so fine that smoking in them would be discountenanced, but mine
+is not impervious to the pipe or cigar, and I entertain the pleasing fancy
+that tobacco-smoke is good for books, disinfects them, and keeps them free
+from the destroying worm. As I do not myself smoke, I like to see my
+friends taking their ease in my book-room, with the "smoke of their
+torment ascending" above my modest volumes. I know how they feel, without
+incurring the expense, and so to them I indite and dedicate
+
+  THE SMOKE TRAVELLER.
+
+  When I puff my cigarette,
+      Straight I see a Spanish girl,
+      Mantilla, fan, coquettish curl,
+      Languid airs and dimpled face,
+      Calculating fatal grace;
+      Hear a twittering serenade
+      Under lofty balcony played;
+      Queen at bull-fight, naught she cares
+      What her agile lover dares;
+  She can love and quick forget.
+
+  Let me but my meerschaum light,
+      I behold a bearded man,
+      Built upon capacious plan,
+      Sabre-slashed in war or duel,
+      Gruff of aspect but not cruel,
+      Metaphysically muddled,
+      With strong beer a little fuddled,
+      Slow in love and deep in books,
+      More sentimental than he looks,
+  Swears new friendships every night.
+
+  Let me my chibouk enkindle,--
+      In a tent I'm quick set down
+      With a Bedouin lean and brown,
+      Plotting gain of merchandise,
+      Or perchance of robber prize;
+      Clumsy camel load upheaving,
+      Woman deftly carpet weaving;
+      Meal of dates and bread and salt,
+      While in azure heavenly vault
+  Throbbing stars begin to dwindle.
+
+  Glowing coal in clay dudheen
+      Carries me to sweet Killarney,
+      Full of hypocritic blarney;
+      Huts with babies, pigs and hens
+      Mixed together; bogs and fens;
+      Shillalahs, praties, usquebaugh,
+      Tenants defying hated law,
+      Fair blue eyes with lashes black,
+      Eyes black and blue from cudgel-thwack,--
+  So fair, so foul, is Erin green.
+
+  My nargileh once inflamed,
+      Quick appears a Turk with turban,
+      Girt with guards in palace urban,
+      Or in house by summer sea
+      Slave-girls dancing languidly;
+      Bow-string, sack and bastinado,
+      Black boats darting in the shadow;
+      Let things happen as they please,
+      Whether well or ill at ease,
+  Fate alone is blessed or blamed.
+
+  With my ancient calumet
+      I can raise a wigwam's smoke,
+      And the copper tribe invoke,--
+      Scalps and wampum, bows and knives,
+      Slender maidens, greasy wives,
+      Papoose hanging on a tree,
+      Chieftains squatting silently,
+      Feathers, beads and hideous paint,
+      Medicine-man and wooden saint,--
+  Forest-framed the vision set.
+
+  My cigar breeds many forms--
+      Planter of the rich Havana,
+      Mopping brow with sheer bandanna;
+      Russian prince in fur arrayed;
+      Paris fop on dress parade;
+      London swell just after dinner;
+      Wall Street broker--gambling sinner;
+      Delver in Nevada mine;
+      Scotch laird bawling "Auld Lang Syne;"
+  Thus Raleigh's weed my fancy warms.
+
+  Life's review in smoke goes past.
+      Fickle fortune, stubborn fate,
+      Right discovered all too late,
+      Beings loved and gone before,
+      Beings loved but friends no more,
+      Self-reproach and futile sighs,
+      Vanity in birth that dies,
+      Longing, heart-break, adoration,--
+      Nothing sure in expectation
+  Save ash-receiver at the last.
+
+In the early history of New England, when the town of Deerfield was burned
+by the Indians, Captain Dunstan, who was the father of a large family,
+deeming discretion the better part of valor, made up his mind to run for
+it and to take one child (as a sample, probably), that being all he could
+safely carry on his horse. But on looking about him, he could not
+determine which child to take, and so observing to his wife, "All or
+none," he set her and the baby on the horse, and brought up the rear on
+foot with his gun, and fended off the redskins and brought the whole
+family into safety. Such is the tale, and in the old primer there was a
+picture of the scene--although I do not understand that it was taken from
+the life, and the story reflects small credit on the character of the
+aborigines for enterprise.
+
+I have often conjectured which of my books I would save in case of fire in
+my library, and whether I should care to rescue any if I could not bring
+off all. Perhaps the problem would work itself out as follows:
+
+  THE FIRE IN THE LIBRARY.
+
+  Twas just before midnight a smart conflagration
+    Broke out in my dwelling and threatened my books;
+  Confounded and dazed with a great consternation
+    I gazed at my treasures with pitiful looks.
+
+  "Oh! which shall I rescue?" I cried in deep feeling;
+    I wished I were armed like Briareus of yore,
+  While sharper and sharper the flames kept revealing
+    The sight of my bibliographical store.
+
+  "My Lamb may remain to be thoroughly roasted,
+    My Crabbe to be broiled and my Bacon to fry,
+  My Browning accustomed to being well toasted,
+    And Waterman Taylor rejoicing to dry."
+
+  At hazard I grasped at the rest of my treasure,
+    And crammed all pockets with dainty eighteens;
+  I packed up a pillow case, heaping good measure,
+    And turned me away from the saddest of scenes.
+
+  But slowly departing, my face growing sadder,
+    At leaving old favorites behind me so far,
+  A feminine voice from the foot of the ladder
+    Cried, "Bring down my Cook-Book and Harper's Bazar!"
+
+It has been hereinbefore intimated that women may be classed among the
+enemies of books. There is at least one time of the year when every
+Book-Worm thinks so, and that is the dread period of
+house-cleaning--sometimes in the spring, sometimes in the autumn, and
+sometimes, in the case of excessively finical housewives, in both. That
+is the time looked forward to by him with apprehension and looked back
+upon with horror, because the poor fellow knows what comes of
+
+  CLEANING THE LIBRARY.
+
+  With traitorous kiss remarked my spouse,
+    "Remain down town to lunch to-day,
+  For we are busy cleaning house,
+    And you would be in Minnie's way."
+
+  When I came home that fateful night,
+    I found within my sacred room
+  The wretched maid had wreaked her spite
+    With mop and pail and witch's broom.
+
+  The books were there, but oh how changed!
+    They startled me with rare surprises,
+  For they had all been rearranged,
+    And less by subjects than by sizes.
+
+  Some volumes numbered right to left,
+    And some were standing on their heads,
+  And some were of their mates bereft,
+    And some behind for refuge fled.
+
+  The women brave attempts had made
+    At placing cognate books together;--
+  They looked like strangers close arrayed
+    Under a porch in stormy weather.
+
+  She watched my face--that spouse of mine--
+    Some approbation there to glean,
+  But seeing I did not incline
+    To praise, remarked, "I've got it clean."
+
+  And so she had--and also wrong;
+    She little knew--she was but thirty--
+  I entertained a preference strong
+    To have it right, though ne'er so dirty.
+
+  That wife of mine has much good sense,
+    To chide her would have been inhuman,
+  And it would be a great expense
+    To graft the book-sense on a woman.
+
+Such are my reflections when I consider a fire in my own little library.
+But when I regard the great and growing mass of books with which the earth
+groans, and reflect how few of them are necessary or original, and how
+little the greater part of them would be missed, I sometimes am led to
+believe that a general conflagration of them might in the long run be a
+blessing to mankind, by the stimulation of thought and the deliverance of
+authors from the influence of tradition and the habit of imitation. When I
+am in this mood I incline to think that much is
+
+  ODE TO OMAR.
+
+  Omar, who burned (or did not burn)
+    The Alexandrian tomes,
+  I would erect to thee an urn
+    Beneath Sophia's domes.
+
+  So many books I can't endure--
+    The dull and commonplace,
+  The dirty, trifling and obscure,
+    The realistic race.
+
+  Would that thy exemplary torch
+    Could bravely blaze again,
+  And many manufactories scorch
+    Of book-inditing men.
+
+  The poets who write "dialect,"
+    Maudlin and coarse by turns,
+  Most ardently do I expect
+    Thou'lt wither up with Burns.
+
+  All the erratic, yawping class
+    Condemn with judgment stern,
+  Walt Whitman's awful "Leaves of Grass"
+    With elegant Swinburne.
+
+  Of commentators make a point,
+    The carping, blind, and dry;
+  Rend the "Baconians" joint by joint,
+    And throw them on to fry.
+
+  Especially I'd have thee choke
+    Law libraries in sheep
+  With fire derived from ancient Coke,
+    And sink in ashes deep.
+
+  Destroy the sheep--don't save my own--
+    I weary of the cram,
+  The misplaced diligence I've shown--
+    But kindly spare my Lamb.
+
+  Fear not to sprinkle on the pyre
+    The woes of "Esther Waters";
+  They'll only make the flame soar higher,
+    And warn Eve's other daughters.
+
+  But 'ware of Howells and of James,
+    Of Trollope and his rout;
+  They'd dampen down the fiercest flames
+    And put your fire out.
+
+
+
+
+XVIII.
+
+LIBRARY COMPANIONS.
+
+
+As a rule I do not care for any constant human companion in my library,
+but I do not object to a cat or a small dog. That picture of Montaigne,
+drawn by himself, amusing his cat with a garter, or that other one of
+Doctor Johnson feeding oysters to his cat Hodge, is a very pleasing one.
+In my library hangs Durer's picture of St. Jerome in his cell, busy with
+his writing, and a dog and a lion quietly dozing together in the
+foreground. As I am no saint I have never been able to keep a lion in my
+library for any great length of time, but I have maintained a dog there.
+Lamb even contended that his books were the better for being dog's-eared,
+but I do not go so far as that. Nor do I pretend that his presence will
+prevent the books from becoming foxed. Here is a portrait of
+
+  MY DOG.
+
+  He is a trifling, homely beast,
+  Of no use, or the very least;
+  To shake imaginary rat
+  Or bark for hours at china cat;
+  To lie at head of stairs and start,
+  Like animated, woolly dart,
+  Upon a non-existent foe;
+  Or on hind legs like monkey go,
+  To beg for sugar or for bone;
+  Never content to be alone;
+  To bask for hours in the sun.
+  Rolled up till head and tail are one;
+  Usurping all the softest places
+  And keeping them with doggish graces;
+  To sneak between the housemaid's feet
+  And scour unnoticed on the street;
+  Wag indefatigable tail;
+  Cajole with piteous human wail;
+  To dance with dainty dandy air
+  When nicely parted is his hair,
+  And look most ancient and dejected
+  When it has been too long neglected;
+  To sleep upon my book-den rug
+  And dream of battle with a pug;
+  To growl with counterfeited rabies;
+  To be more trouble than twin babies;--
+  These are the qualities and tricks
+  That in my heart his image fix;
+  And so in cursory, doggerel rhyme
+  I celebrate him in his time,
+  Nor wait his virtues to rehearse
+  In cold obituary verse.
+
+There is one other speaking companion that I would tolerate in my library,
+and that is a clock. I have a number of clocks in mine, and if it were not
+for their unanimous and warning voice I might forget to go to bed.
+Perhaps my reader would like to hear an account of
+
+  MY CLOCKS.
+
+  Five clocks adorn my domicile
+    And give me occupation,
+  For moments else inane I fill
+    With their due regulation.
+
+  Four of these clocks, on each Lord's Day,
+    As regular as preaching,
+  I wind and set, so that they may
+    The flight of time be teaching.
+
+  My grandfather's old clock is chief,
+    With foolish moon-faced dial;
+  Procrastination is a thief
+    It always brings to trial.
+
+  Its height is as the tallest men,
+    Its pendulum beats slow,
+  And when its awful bell booms ten,
+    Young men get up and go.
+
+  Another clock is bronze and gilt,
+    Penelope sits on it,
+  And in her fingers holds a quilt--
+    How strange 'tis not a bonnet!
+
+  Memorial of those weary years
+    When she the web unravelled,
+  While Ithacus choked down his fears
+    And slow from Ilium travelled.
+
+  Ceres upon the third, with spray
+    Of grain, in classic gown,
+  Seems sadly to recall the day
+    Proserpine sank down,
+
+  With scarcely time to say good-bye,
+    Unto the world of Dis;
+  And keeps account, with many a sigh,
+    Of harvest time in this.
+
+  Another clock is rococo,
+    Of Louis Sept or Seize,
+  With many a dreadful furbelow
+    An artist's hair to raise,
+
+  Suggestions of a giddy court,
+    With fan and boufflant bustle,
+  When silken trains made gallant sport
+    And o'er the floor did rustle.
+
+  The fourth was brought, in foolish trust
+    From Alpland far away,
+  A baby clock, and so it must
+    Be tended every day.
+
+  Importunate and trivial thing!
+    Thou katydid of clocks!
+  Defying all my skill to bring
+    Right time from out thy box.
+
+  With works of wood and face of brass
+    On which queer cherubs play,
+  The tedious hours thou well dost pass,
+    And none thy chirp gainsay.
+
+Among the silent companions in my study are the effigies of the four
+greatest geniuses of modern times in the realms of literature, art, music
+and war--a print of Shakespeare; one of Michael Angelo's corrugated face
+with its broken nose; a bust of Beethoven, resembling a pouting lion; and
+a print of Napoleon at St. Helena, representing him dressed in a white
+duck suit, with a broad-brimmed straw hat, and sitting looking seaward,
+with those unfathomable eyes, a newspaper lying in his lap. Unhappy
+faces all except the first--his cheerful, probably because he has effected
+an arrangement with an otherwise idle person, named Bacon, to do all his
+work for him. But there is another portrait, at which I look oftener, the
+original of which probably takes more interest in me, but is unknown to
+every visitor to my study. I myself have not seen her in half a century.
+I call it simply
+
+  A PORTRAIT.
+
+  A gentle face is ever in my room,
+    With features fine and melancholy eyes,
+  Though young, a little past life's freshest bloom,
+    And always with air of sad surmise.
+
+  A great white cap almost conceals her hair,
+    A collar broad falls o'er her shoulders slender;
+  The fashion of a bygone age an air
+    Of quaintness to her simple garb doth render.
+
+  Those hazel eyes pursue me as I move
+    And seem to watch my busy toiling pen;
+  They hold me with an anxious yearning love,
+    As if she dwelt upon the earth again.
+
+  My mother's portrait! fifty years ago,
+    When I was but a heedless happy boy,
+  The influence of her being ceased to flow,
+    And she laid down life's burden and its joy.
+
+  And now as I sit pondering o'er my books,
+    So vainly seeking a receding rest,
+  I read the wonder in her steadfast looks:
+    "Is this my son who lay upon my breast?"
+
+  And when for me there is an end of time,
+    And this unsatisfying work is done,
+  If I shall meet thee in thy peaceful clime,
+    Young mother, wilt thou know thy gray-haired son?
+
+There is one other work of art which adorns my library--a medallion by a
+dear friend of mine, an eminent sculptor, the story of which I will put
+into his mouth. He calls the face
+
+  MY SCHOOLMATE.
+
+  The snows have settled on my head
+    But not upon my heart,
+  And incidents of years long fled
+    From out my memory start.
+  My hand is cunning to contrive
+    The shapes my brain invents,
+  And keep in marble forms alive
+    That which my soul contents;
+  And I have wife, and children tall,
+    Grandchildren cluster near,
+  And sweet the applause of men doth fall
+    On my undeafened ear.
+  But still my mind will backward turn
+    For half a century,
+  And without reasoning will yearn
+    For sight or news of thee,
+  Thou playmate of my boyhood days,
+    When life was all aglow,
+  When the sweetest thing was thy girlish praise,
+    As I drew thee o'er the snow
+  To the old red school-house by the road,
+    Where we learned to spell and read,
+  When thou wert all my fairy load
+    And I was thy prancing steed.
+
+  Oh! thou wert simple then and fair.
+    Artless and unconstrained,
+  With quaintly knotted auburn hair
+    From which the wind refrained,
+  And from thine earnest steady eyes
+    Shone out a nature pure,
+  Formed by kind Heaven, a man's best prize,
+    To love and to endure.
+
+  Oh! art thou still in life and time,
+    Or hast thou gone before?
+  And hath thy lot been like to mine,
+    Or pinched and bare and sore?
+  And didst thou marry, or art thou
+    Still of the spinster tribe?
+  Perchance thou art a widow now,
+    Steeled against second bribe?
+  Do grandsons round thy hearthstone play,
+    Or dost thou end thy race?
+  And could that auburn hair grow gray,
+    And wrinkles line thy face?
+  I cannot make thee old and plain--
+    I would not if I could--
+  And I recall thee without stain,
+    Simply and sweetly good;
+  And I have carved thy pretty head
+    And hung it on my wall,
+  And to all men let it be said,
+    I like it best of all;
+  For on a far-off snowy road,
+    Before I had learned to read,
+  Thou wert all my fairy load
+    And I was thy prancing steed!
+
+I have reserved my queerest library companion till the last. It is not a
+book, although it is good for nothing but to read. It is not an autograph,
+although it is simply the name of an individual. It is my office sign
+which I have cherished, as a memento of busier days. Some singular
+reflections are roused when I gaze at
+
+  MY SHINGLE.
+
+  My shingle is battered and old,
+    No longer deciphered with ease,
+  So I've taken it in from the cold,
+    And fastened it up on a frieze.
+
+  A long generation ago,
+    With feelings of singular pride
+  I regarded its glittering show,
+    And pointed it out to my bride.
+
+  Companions of youth have grown few,
+    Its loves and aversions are faint;
+  No spirit to make friends anew--
+    An old enemy seems like a saint.
+
+  My clients have paid the last fee
+    For passage in Charon's sad boat,
+  Imposing no duty on me
+    Save to utter this querelous note;
+
+  And still as I toil in life's mills,
+    In loneliness growing profound,
+  To attend on the proof of their wills
+    And swear that their wits were quite sound!
+
+  So I work with the scissors and pen,
+    And to show of old courage a spark,
+  I must utter a jest now and then,
+    Like whistling of boys in the dark.
+
+  I tack my old friend on the wall,
+    So that infantile grandson of mine
+  May not think, if my life he recall,
+    That I died without making a sign.
+
+  When at court on the great judgment day
+    With penitent suitors I mingle,
+  May my guilt be washed cleanly away,
+    Like that on my faded old shingle!
+
+Of course my chief occupation in my library is reading and writing. To be
+sure, I do a good deal of thinking there. But there is another occupation
+which I practice to a great extent, which does not involve reading or
+writing at all, nor thinking to any considerable degree. That is playing
+solitaire. I play only one kind of this and that I have played for many
+years. It requires two packs of cards, and requires building on the aces
+and kings, and so I have them tacked down on a lap-board to save picking
+out and laying down every time. This particular game is called "St.
+Elba," probably because Napoleon did not play it, and it can be "won" once
+in about sixty trials. I do not care for card-playing with others, but I
+have certain reasons for liking
+
+  SOLITAIRE.
+
+  I like to play cards with a man of sense,
+    And allow him to play with me,
+  And so it has grown a delight intense
+    To play solitaire on my knee.
+
+  I love the quaint form of the sceptered king,
+    The simplicity of the ace,
+  The stolid knave like a wooden thing,
+    And her majesty's smirking face.
+
+  Diamonds, aces, and clubs and spades--
+    Their garb of respectable black
+  A moiety brilliant of red invades,
+    As they mingle in motley pack.
+
+  Independent of anyone's signal or leave,
+    Relieved from the bluffing of poker,
+  I've no apprehension of ace up a sleeve,
+    And fear no superfluous joker.
+
+  I build up and down; all the cards I hold,
+    And the game is always fair,
+  For I am honest, and so is my old
+    Companion at solitaire.
+
+  Let kings condescend to the lower grades,
+    Queens glitter with diamonds rare,
+  Knaves flourish their clubs, and peasants wield spades,
+    But give me my solitaire.
+
+
+
+
+XIX.
+
+THE FRIENDSHIP OF BOOKS.
+
+
+To many peaceful men of the legal robe the companionship of books is
+inexpressibly dear. What a privilege it is to summon the greatest and most
+charming spirits of the past from their graves, and find them always
+willing to talk to us! How delightful to go to our well-known
+book-shelves, lay hands on our favorite authors--even in the dark, so well
+do we know them--take any volume, open it at any page, and in a few
+minutes lose all sense and remembrance of the real world, with its strife,
+its bitterness, its disappointments, its hollowness, its unfaithfulness,
+its selfishness, in the pictures of an ideal world! The real world, do we
+say? Which is the real world, that of history or that of fiction? In this
+age of historic doubt and iconoclasm, are not the heroes of our favorite
+romances much more real than those of history? Captain Ed'ard Cuttle,
+mariner, is much more real to us than Captain Joseph Cook; Cooper's Two
+Admirals than the great Nelson; Leather-Stocking than the yellow-haired
+Custer; Henry Esmond than any of the Pretenders; Hester Prynne and Becky
+Sharp than Catherine of Russia or Aspasia or Lucrezia; Sidney Carton than
+Philip Sidney. Even the kings and heroes who have lived in history live
+more vividly for us in romance. We know the crooked Richard and the
+crafty Louis XI. most familiarly, if not most accurately, through
+Shakespeare and Scott; and where in history do we get so haunting a
+picture of the great Napoleon and Waterloo as in Victor Hugo's wondrous
+but inaccurate chapter? Happy is the man who has for his associates David,
+Solomon, Job, Paul, and John, in spite of the assaults of modern criticism
+upon the Scriptures! No one can shake our faith in Don Quixote, although
+the accounts of the Knight "without fear and without reproach" are so
+short and vague. There is no doubt about the travels of Christian,
+although those of Stanley may be questioned. The Vicar of Wakefield is a
+much more actual personage than Peter who preached the Crusades. Sir Roger
+de Coverley and his squire life are much more probable to us than Sir
+William Temple in his gardens. There is no character in romance who has
+not or might not have lived, but we are thrown into grave doubts of the
+saintly Washington and the devilish Napoleon depicted three quarters of a
+century ago. We cast history aside in scepticism and disgust; we cling to
+romance with faith and delight. "The things that are seen are temporal;
+the things that are not seen are eternal." So let the writer hereof sing a
+song in praise of
+
+  MY FRIENDS THE BOOKS.
+
+  Friends of my youth and of my age
+    Within my chamber wait,
+  Until I fondly turn the page
+    And prove them wise and great.
+
+  At me they do not rudely glare
+    With eye that luster lacks,
+  But knowing how I hate a stare,
+    Politely turn their backs.
+
+  They never split my head with din,
+    Nor snuffle through their noses,
+  Nor admiration seek to win
+    By inartistic poses.
+
+  If I should chance to fall asleep,
+    They do not scowl or snap,
+  But prudently their counsel keep
+    Till I have had my nap.
+
+  And if I choose to rout them out
+    Unseasonably at night,
+  They do not chafe nor curse nor pout,
+    But rise all clothed and bright.
+
+  They ne'er intrude with silly say,
+    They never scold nor worry;
+  They ne'er suspect and ne'er betray,
+    They're never in a hurry.
+
+  Anacreon never gets quite full,
+    Nor Horace too flirtatious;
+  Swift makes due fun of Johnny Bull,
+    And Addison is gracious.
+
+  Saint-Simon and Grammont rehearse
+    Their tales of court with glee;
+  For all their scandal I'm no worse,--
+    They never peach on me.
+
+  For what I owe Montaigne, no dread
+    To meet him on the morrow;
+  And better still, it must be said,
+    He never wants to borrow.
+
+  Paul never asks, though sure to preach,
+    Why I don't come to church;
+  Though Dr. Johnson strives to teach,
+    I do not fear his birch.
+
+  My Dickens never is away
+    Whene'er I choose to call;
+  I need not wait for Thackeray
+    In chill palatial hall.
+
+  I help to bring Amelia to,
+    Who always is a-fainting;
+  I love the Oxford graduate who
+    Explains great Turner's painting.
+
+  My memory is full of graves
+    Of friends in days gone by;
+  But Time these sweet companions saves,--
+    These friends who never die!
+
+
+
+
+  SO HERE ENDETH "IN THE TRACK OF THE
+  BOOK-WORM." PRINTED BY ME, ELBERT
+  HUBBARD, AT THE ROYCROFT SHOP IN
+  EAST AURORA, N. Y., U. S. A., AND
+  COMPLETED THIS TWENTY-SIXTH DAY OF
+  JUNE, MDCCCXCVII.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg's In the Track of the Bookworm, by Irving Browne
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