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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/3616-0.txt b/3616-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..fadf030 --- /dev/null +++ b/3616-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1241 @@ +The Project Gutenberg eBook, The O'Conors of Castle Conor, by Anthony +Trollope + + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most +other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions +whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of +the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at +www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have +to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. + + + + +Title: The O'Conors of Castle Conor + + +Author: Anthony Trollope + + + +Release Date: January 16, 2015 [eBook #3616] +[This file was first posted on June 15, 2001] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: UTF-8 + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE O'CONORS OF CASTLE CONOR*** + + +Transcribed from the 1864 Chapman & Hall “Tales of All Countries” edition +by David Price, email ccx074@pglaf.org + + + + + + THE O’CONORS OF CASTLE CONOR, COUNTY MAYO. + + +I SHALL never forget my first introduction to country life in Ireland, my +first day’s hunting there, or the manner in which I passed the evening +afterwards. Nor shall I ever cease to be grateful for the hospitality +which I received from the O’Conors of Castle Conor. My acquaintance with +the family was first made in the following manner. But before I begin my +story, let me inform my reader that my name is Archibald Green. + +I had been for a fortnight in Dublin, and was about to proceed into +county Mayo on business which would occupy me there for some weeks. My +head-quarters would, I found, be at the town of Ballyglass; and I soon +learned that Ballyglass was not a place in which I should find hotel +accommodation of a luxurious kind, or much congenial society indigenous +to the place itself. + +“But you are a hunting man, you say,” said old Sir P— C—; “and in that +case you will soon know Tom O’Conor. Tom won’t let you be dull. I’d +write you a letter to Tom, only he’ll certainly make you out without my +taking the trouble.” + +I did think at the time that the old baronet might have written the +letter for me, as he had been a friend of my father’s in former days; but +he did not, and I started for Ballyglass with no other introduction to +any one in the county than that contained in Sir P—’s promise that I +should soon know Mr. Thomas O’Conor. + +I had already provided myself with a horse, groom, saddle and bridle, and +these I sent down, en avant, that the Ballyglassians might know that I +was somebody. Perhaps, before I arrived Tom O’Conor might learn that a +hunting man was coming into the neighbourhood, and I might find at the +inn a polite note intimating that a bed was at my service at Castle +Conor. I had heard so much of the free hospitality of the Irish gentry +as to imagine that such a thing might be possible. + +But I found nothing of the kind. Hunting gentlemen in those days were +very common in county Mayo, and one horse was no great evidence of a +man’s standing in the world. Men there as I learnt afterwards, are +sought for themselves quite as much as they are elsewhere; and though my +groom’s top-boots were neat, and my horse a very tidy animal, my entry +into Ballyglass created no sensation whatever. + +In about four days after my arrival, when I was already infinitely +disgusted with the little Pot-house in which I was forced to stay, and +had made up my mind that the people in county Mayo were a churlish set, I +sent my horse on to a meet of the fox-hounds, and followed after myself +on an open car. + +No one but an erratic fox-hunter such as I am,—a fox-hunter, I mean, +whose lot it has been to wander about from one pack of hounds to +another,—can understand the melancholy feeling which a man has when he +first intrudes himself, unknown by any one, among an entirely new set of +sportsmen. When a stranger falls thus as it were out of the moon into a +hunt, it is impossible that men should not stare at him and ask who he +is. And it is so disagreeable to be stared at, and to have such +questions asked! This feeling does not come upon a man in Leicestershire +or Gloucestershire where the numbers are large, and a stranger or two +will always be overlooked, but in small hunting fields it is so painful +that a man has to pluck up much courage before he encounters it. + +We met on the morning in question at Bingham’s Grove. There were not +above twelve or fifteen men out, all of whom, or nearly all were cousins +to each other. They seemed to be all Toms, and Pats, and Larrys, and +Micks. I was done up very knowingly in pink, and thought that I looked +quite the thing, but for two or three hours nobody noticed me. + +I had my eyes about me, however, and soon found out which of them was Tom +O’Conor. He was a fine-looking fellow, thin and tall, but not largely +made, with a piercing gray eye, and a beautiful voice for speaking to a +hound. He had two sons there also, short, slight fellows, but exquisite +horsemen. I already felt that I had a kind of acquaintance with the +father, but I hardly knew on what ground to put in my claim. + +We had no sport early in the morning. It was a cold bleak February day, +with occasional storms of sleet. We rode from cover to cover, but all in +vain. “I am sorry, sir, that we are to have such a bad day, as you are a +stranger here,” said one gentleman to me. This was Jack O’Conor, Tom’s +eldest son, my bosom friend for many a year after. Poor Jack! I fear +that the Encumbered Estates Court sent him altogether adrift upon the +world. + +“We may still have a run from Poulnaroe, if the gentleman chooses to come +on,” said a voice coming from behind with a sharp trot. It was Tom +O’Conor. + +“Wherever the hounds go, I’ll follow,” said I. + +“Then come on to Poulnaroe,” said Mr. O’Conor. I trotted on quickly by +his side, and before we reached the cover had managed to slip in +something about Sir P. C. + +“What the deuce!” said he. “What! a friend of Sir P—’s? Why the deuce +didn’t you tell me so? What are you doing down here? Where are you +staying?” &c. &c. &c. + +At Poulnaroe we found a fox, but before we did so Mr. O’ Conor had asked +me over to Castle Conor. And this he did in such a way that there was no +possibility of refusing him—or, I should rather say, of disobeying him. +For his invitation came quite in the tone of a command. + +“You’ll come to us of course when the day is over—and let me see; we’re +near Ballyglass now, but the run will be right away in our direction. +Just send word for them to send your things to Castle Conor.” + +“But they’re all about, and unpacked,” said I. + +“Never mind. Write a note and say what you want now, and go and get the +rest to-morrow yourself. Here, Patsey!—Patsey! run into Ballyglass for +this gentleman at once. Now don’t be long, for the chances are we shall +find here.” And then, after giving some further hurried instructions he +left me to write a line in pencil to the innkeeper’s wife on the back of +a ditch. + +This I accordingly did. “Send my small portmanteau,” I said, “and all my +black dress clothes, and shirts, and socks, and all that, and above all +my dressing things which are on the little table, and the satin +neck-handkerchief, and whatever you do, mind you send my _pumps_;” and I +underscored the latter word; for Jack O’Conor, when his father left me, +went on pressing the invitation. “My sisters are going to get up a +dance,” said he; “and if you are fond of that kind of things perhaps we +can amuse you.” Now in those days I was very fond of dancing—and very +fond of young ladies too, and therefore glad enough to learn that Tom +O’Conor had daughters as well as sons. On this account I was very +particular in underscoring the word pumps. + +“And hurry, you young divil,” Jack O’Conor said to Patsey. + +“I have told him to take the portmanteau over on a car,” said I. + +“All right; then you’ll find it there on our arrival.” + +We had an excellent run, in which I may make bold to say that I did not +acquit myself badly. I stuck very close to the hounds, as did the whole +of the O’Conor brood; and when the fellow contrived to earth himself, as +he did, I received those compliments on my horse, which is the most +approved praise which one fox-hunter ever gives to another. + +“We’ll buy that fellow of you before we let you go,” said Peter, the +youngest son. + +“I advise you to look sharp after your money if you sell him to my +brother,” said Jack. + +And then we trotted slowly off to Castle Conor, which, however, was by no +means near to us. “We have ten miles to go;—good Irish miles,” said the +father. “I don’t know that I ever remember a fox from Poulnaroe taking +that line before.” + +“He wasn’t a Poulnaroe fox,” said Peter. + +“I don’t know that;” said Jack; and then they debated that question +hotly. + +Our horses were very tired, and it was late before we reached Mr. +O’Conor’s house. That getting home from hunting with a thoroughly weary +animal, who has no longer sympathy or example to carry him on, is very +tedious work. In the present instance I had company with me; but when a +man is alone, when his horse toes at every ten steps, when the night is +dark and the rain pouring, and there are yet eight miles of road to be +conquered,—at such time a man is almost apt to swear that he will give up +hunting. + +At last we were in the Castle Conor stable yard;—for we had approached +the house by some back way; and as we entered the house by a door leading +through a wilderness of back passages, Mr. O’Conor said out loud, “Now, +boys, remember I sit down to dinner in twenty minutes.” And then turning +expressly to me, he laid his hand kindly upon my shoulder and said, “I +hope you will make yourself quite at home at Castle Conor, and whatever +you do, don’t keep us waiting for dinner. You can dress in twenty +minutes, I suppose?” + +“In ten!” said I, glibly. + +“That’s well. Jack and Peter will show you your room,” and so he turned +away and left us. + +My two young friends made their way into the great hall, and thence into +the drawing-room, and I followed them. We were all dressed in pink, and +had waded deep through bog and mud. I did not exactly know whither I was +being led in this guise, but I soon found myself in the presence of two +young ladies, and of a girl about thirteen years of age. + +“My sisters,” said Jack, introducing me very laconically; “Miss O’Conor, +Miss Kate O’Conor, Miss Tizzy O’Conor.” + +“My name is not Tizzy,” said the younger; “it’s Eliza. How do you do, +sir? I hope you had a fine hunt! Was papa well up, Jack?” + +Jack did not condescend to answer this question, but asked one of the +elder girls whether anything had come, and whether a room had been made +ready for me. + +“Oh yes!” said Miss O’Conor; “they came, I know, for I saw them brought +into the house; and I hope Mr. Green will find everything comfortable.” +As she said this I thought I saw a slight smile steal across her +remarkably pretty mouth. + +They were both exceedingly pretty girls. Fanny the elder wore long +glossy curls,—for I write, oh reader, of bygone days, as long ago as +that, when ladies wore curls if it pleased them so to do, and gentlemen +danced in pumps, with black handkerchiefs round their necks,—yes, long +black, or nearly black silken curls; and then she had such eyes;—I never +knew whether they were most wicked or most bright; and her face was all +dimples, and each dimple was laden with laughter and laden with love. +Kate was probably the prettier girl of the two, but on the whole not so +attractive. She was fairer than her sister, and wore her hair in braids; +and was also somewhat more demure in her manner. + +In spite of the special injunctions of Mr. O’Conor senior, it was +impossible not to loiter for five minutes over the drawing-room fire +talking to these houris—more especially as I seemed to know them +intimately by intuition before half of the five minutes was over. They +were so easy, so pretty, so graceful, so kind, they seemed to take it so +much as a matter of course that I should stand there talking in my red +coat and muddy boots. + +“Well; do go and dress yourselves,” at last said Fanny, pretending to +speak to her brothers but looking more especially a me. “You know how +mad papa will be. And remember Mr. Green, we expect great things from +your dancing to-night. Your coming just at this time is such a Godsend.” +And again that soupçon of a smile passed over her face. + +I hurried up to my room, Peter and Jack coming with me to the door. “Is +everything right?” said Peter, looking among the towels and water-jugs. +“They’ve given you a decent fire for a wonder,” said Jack, stirring up +the red hot turf which blazed in the grate. “All right as a trivet,” +said I. “And look alive like a good fellow,” said Jack. We had scowled +at each other in the morning as very young men do when they are +strangers; and now, after a few hours, we were intimate friends. + +I immediately turned to my work, and was gratified to find that all my +things were laid out ready for dressing; my portmanteau had of course +come open, as my keys were in my pocket, and therefore some of the +excellent servants of the house had been able to save me all the trouble +of unpacking. There was my shirt hanging before the fire; my black +clothes were spread upon the bed, my socks and collar and handkerchief +beside them; my brushes were on the toilet table, and everything prepared +exactly as though my own man had been there. How nice! + +I immediately went to work at getting off my spurs and boots, and then +proceeded to loosen the buttons at my knees. In doing this I sat down in +the arm-chair which had been drawn up for me, opposite the fire. But +what was the object on which my eyes then fell;—the objects I should +rather say! + +Immediately in front of my chair was placed, just ready for may feet, an +enormous pair of shooting-boots—half-boots made to lace up round the +ankles, with thick double leather soles, and each bearing half a stone of +iron in the shape of nails and heel-pieces. I had superintended the +making of these shoes in Burlington Arcade with the greatest diligence. +I was never a good shot; and, like some other sportsmen, intended to make +up for my deficiency in performance by the excellence of my shooting +apparel. “Those nails are not large enough,” I had said; “nor nearly +large enough.” But when the boots came home they struck even me as being +too heavy, too metalsome. “He, he, he,” laughed the boot boy as he +turned them up for me to look at. It may therefore be imagined of what +nature were the articles which were thus set out for the evening’s +dancing. + +And then the way in which they were placed! When I saw this the +conviction flew across my mind like a flash of lightning that the +preparation had been made under other eyes than those of the servant. +The heavy big boots were placed so prettily before the chair, and the +strings of each were made to dangle down at the sides, as though just +ready for tying! They seemed to say, the boots did, “Now, make haste. +We at any rate are ready—you cannot say that you were kept waiting for +us.” No mere servant’s hand had ever enabled a pair of boots to laugh at +one so completely. + +But what was I to do? I rushed at the small portmanteau, thinking that +my pumps also might be there. The woman surely could not have been such +a fool as to send me those tons of iron for my evening wear! But, alas, +alas! no pumps were there. There was nothing else in the way of covering +for my feet; not even a pair of slippers. + +And now what was I to do? The absolute magnitude of my misfortune only +loomed upon me by degrees. The twenty minutes allowed by that stern old +paterfamilias were already gone and I had done nothing towards dressing. +And indeed it was impossible that I should do anything that would be of +avail. I could not go down to dinner in my stocking feet, nor could I +put on my black dress trousers, over a pair of mud-painted top-boots. As +for those iron-soled horrors—; and then I gave one of them a kick with +the side of my bare foot which sent it half way under the bed. + +But what was I to do? I began washing myself and brushing my hair with +this horrid weight upon my mind. My first plan was to go to bed, and +send down word that I had been taken suddenly ill in the stomach; then to +rise early in the morning and get away unobserved. But by such a course +of action I should lose all chance of any further acquaintance with those +pretty girls! That they were already aware of the extent of my +predicament, and were now enjoying it—of that I was quite sure. + +What if I boldly put on the shooting-boots, and clattered down to dinner +in them? What if I took the bull by the horns, and made, myself, the +most of the joke? This might be very well for the dinner, but it would +be a bad joke for me when the hour for dancing came. And, alas! I felt +that I lacked the courage. It is not every man that can walk down to +dinner, in a strange house full of ladies, wearing such boots as those I +have described. + +Should I not attempt to borrow a pair? This, all the world will say, +should have been my first idea. But I have not yet mentioned that I am +myself a large-boned man, and that my feet are especially well developed. +I had never for a moment entertained a hope that I should find any one in +that house whose boot I could wear. But at last I rang the bell. I +would send for Jack, and if everything failed, I would communicate my +grief to him. + +I had to ring twice before anybody came. The servants, I well knew, were +putting the dinner on the table. At last a man entered the room, dressed +in rather shabby black, whom I afterwards learned to be the butler. + +“What is your name, my friend?” said I, determined to make an ally of the +man. + +“My name? Why Larry sure, yer honer. And the masther is out of his +sinses in a hurry, becase yer honer don’t come down.” + +“Is he though? Well now, Larry; tell me this; which of all the gentlemen +in the house has got the largest foot?” + +“Is it the largest foot, yer honer?” said Larry, altogether surprised by +my question. + +“Yes; the largest foot,” and then I proceeded to explain to him my +misfortune. He took up first my top-boot, and then the shooting-boot—in +looking at which he gazed with wonder at the nails;—and then he glanced +at my feet, measuring them with his eye; and after this he pronounced his +opinion. + +“Yer honer couldn’t wear a morsel of leather belonging to ere a one of +’em, young or ould. There niver was a foot like that yet among the +O’Conors.” + +“But are there no strangers staying here?” + +“There’s three or four on ’em come in to dinner; but they’ll be wanting +their own boots I’m thinking. And there’s young Misther Dillon; he’s +come to stay. But Lord love you—” and he again looked at the enormous +extent which lay between the heel and the toe of the shooting apparatus +which he still held in his hand. “I niver see such a foot as that in the +whole barony,” he said, “barring my own.” + +Now Larry was a large man, much larger altogether than myself, and as he +said this I looked down involuntarily at his feet; or rather at his foot, +for as he stood I could only see one. And then a sudden hope filled my +heart. On that foot there glittered a shoe—not indeed such as were my +own which were now resting ingloriously at Ballyglass while they were so +sorely needed at Castle Conor; but one which I could wear before ladies, +without shame—and in my present frame of mind with infinite contentment. + +“Let me look at that one of your own,” said I to the man, as though it +were merely a subject for experimental inquiry. Larry, accustomed to +obedience, took off the shoe and handed it to me. + +My own foot was immediately in it, and I found that it fitted me like a +glove. + +“And now the other,” said I—not smiling, for a smile would have put him +on his guard; but somewhat sternly, so that that habit of obedience +should not desert him at this perilous moment. And then I stretched out +my hand. + +“But yer honer can’t keep ’em, you know,” said he. “I haven’t the ghost +of another shoe to my feet.” But I only looked more sternly than before, +and still held out my hand. Custom prevailed. Larry stooped down +slowly, looking at me the while, and pulling off the other slipper handed +it to me with much hesitation. Alas! as I put it to my foot I found that +it was old, and worn, and irredeemably down at heel;—that it was in fact +no counterpart at all to that other one which was to do duty as its +fellow. But nevertheless I put my foot into it, and felt that a descent +to the drawing-room was now possible. + +“But yer honer will give ’em back to a poor man?” said Larry almost +crying. “The masther’s mad this minute becase the dinner’s not up. +Glory to God, only listhen to that!” And as he spoke a tremendous peal +rang out from some bell down stairs that had evidently been shaken by an +angry hand. + +“Larry,” said I—and I endeavoured to assume a look of very grave +importance as I spoke—“I look to you to assist me in this matter.” + +“Och—wirra sthrue then, and will you let me go? just listhen to that,” +and another angry peal rang out, loud and repeated. + +“If you do as I ask you,” I continued, “you shall be well rewarded. Look +here; look at these boots,” and I held up the shooting-shoes new from +Burlington Arcade. “They cost thirty shillings—thirty shillings! and I +will give them to you for the loan of this pair of slippers.” + +“They’d be no use at all to me, yer honer; not the laist use in life.” + +“You could do with them very well for to-night, and then you could sell +them. And here are ten shillings besides,” and I held out half a +sovereign which the poor fellow took into his hand. + +I waited no further parley but immediately walked out of the room. With +one foot I was sufficiently pleased. As regarded that I felt that I had +overcome my difficulty. But the other was not so satisfactory. Whenever +I attempted to lift it from the ground the horrid slipper would fall off, +or only just hang by the toe. As for dancing, that would be out of the +question. + +“Och, murther, murther,” sang out Larry, as he heard me going down +stairs. “What will I do at all? Tare and ’ounds; there, he’s at it +agin, as mad as blazes.” This last exclamation had reference to another +peal which was evidently the work of the master’s hand. + +I confess I was not quite comfortable as I walked down stairs. In the +first place I was nearly half an hour late, and I knew from the vigour of +the peals that had sounded that my slowness had already been made the +subject of strong remarks. And then my left shoe went flop, flop, on +every alternate step of the stairs. By no exertion of my foot in the +drawing up of my toe could I induce it to remain permanently fixed upon +my foot. But over and above and worse than all this was the conviction +strong upon my mind that I should become a subject of merriment to the +girls as soon as I entered the room. They would understand the cause of +my distress, and probably at this moment were expecting to hear me +clatter through the stone hall with those odious metal boots. + +However, I hurried down and entered the drawing-room, determined to keep +my position near the door, so that I might have as little as possible to +do on entering and as little as possible in going out. But I had other +difficulties in store for me. I had not as yet been introduced to Mrs. +O’Conor; nor to Miss O’Conor, the squire’s unmarried sister. + +“Upon my word I thought you were never coming,” said Mr. O’Conor as soon +as he saw me. “It is just one hour since we entered the house. Jack, I +wish you would find out what has come to that fellow Larry,” and again he +rang the bell. He was too angry, or it might be too impatient to go +through the ceremony of introducing me to anybody. + +I saw that the two girls looked at me very sharply, but I stood at the +back of an arm-chair so that no one could see my feet. But that little +imp Tizzy walked round deliberately, looked at my heels, and then walked +back again. It was clear that she was in the secret. + +There were eight or ten people in the room, but I was too much fluttered +to notice well who they were. + +“Mamma,” said Miss O’Conor, “let me introduce Mr. Green to you.” + +It luckily happened that Mrs. O’Conor was on the same side of the fire as +myself, and I was able to take the hand which she offered me without +coming round into the middle of the circle. Mrs. O’Conor was a little +woman, apparently not of much importance in the world, but, if one might +judge from first appearance, very good-natured. + +“And my aunt Die, Mr. Green,” said Kate, pointing to a very +straight-backed, grim-looking lady, who occupied a corner of a sofa, on +the opposite side of the hearth. I knew that politeness required that I +should walk across the room and make acquaintance with her. But under +the existing circumstances how was I to obey the dictates of politeness? +I was determined therefore to stand my ground, and merely bowed across +the room at Miss O’Conor. In so doing I made an enemy who never deserted +me during the whole of my intercourse with the family. But for her, who +knows who might have been sitting opposite to me as I now write? + +“Upon my word, Mr. Green, the ladies will expect much from an Adonis who +takes so long over his toilet,” said Tom O’Conor in that cruel tone of +banter which he knew so well how to use. + +“You forget, father, that men in London can’t jump in and out of their +clothes as quick as we wild Irishmen,” said Jack. + +“Mr. Green knows that we expect a great deal from him this evening. I +hope you polk well, Mr. Green,” said Kate. + +I muttered something about never dancing, but I knew that that which I +said was inaudible. + +“I don’t think Mr. Green will dance,” said Tizzy; “at least not much.” +The impudence of that child was, I think, unparalleled by any that I have +ever witnessed. + +“But in the name of all that’s holy, why don’t we have dinner?” And Mr. +O’Conor thundered at the door. “Larry, Larry, Larry!” he screamed. + +“Yes, yer honer, it’ll be all right in two seconds,” answered Larry, from +some bottomless abyss. “Tare an’ ages; what’ll I do at all,” I heard him +continuing, as he made his way into the hall. Oh what a clatter he made +upon the pavement,—for it was all stone! And how the drops of +perspiration stood upon my brow as I listened to him! + +And then there was a pause, for the man had gone into the dining-room. I +could see now that Mr. O’Conor was becoming very angry, and Jack the +eldest son—oh, how often he and I have laughed over all this since—left +the drawing-room for the second time. Immediately afterwards Larry’s +footsteps were again heard, hurrying across the hall, and then there was +a great slither, and an exclamation, and the noise of a fall—and I could +plainly hear poor Larry’s head strike against the stone floor. + +“Ochone, ochone!” he cried at the top of his voice—“I’m murthered with +’em now intirely; and d— ’em for boots—St. Peter be good to me.” + +There was a general rush into the hall, and I was carried with the +stream. The poor fellow who had broken his head would be sure to tell +how I had robbed him of his shoes. The coachman was already helping him +up, and Peter good-naturedly lent a hand. + +“What on earth is the matter?” said Mr. O’Conor. + +“He must be tipsy,” whispered Miss O’Conor, the maiden sister. + +“I aint tipsy at all thin,” said Larry, getting up and rubbing the back +of his head, and sundry other parts of his body. “Tipsy indeed!” And +then he added when he was quite upright, “The dinner is sarved—at last.” + +And he bore it all without telling! “I’ll give that fellow a guinea +to-morrow morning,” said I to myself—“if it’s the last that I have in the +world.” + +I shall never forget the countenance of the Miss O’Conors as Larry +scrambled up cursing the unfortunate boots—“What on earth has he got on?” +said Mr. O’Conor. + +“Sorrow take ’em for shoes,” ejaculated Larry. But his spirit was good +and he said not a word to betray me. + +We all then went in to dinner how we best could. It was useless for us +to go back into the drawing-room, that each might seek his own partner. +Mr. O’Conor “the masther,” not caring much for the girls who were around +him, and being already half beside himself with the confusion and delay, +led the way by himself. I as a stranger should have given my arm to Mrs. +O’Conor; but as it was I took her eldest daughter instead, and contrived +to shuffle along into the dining-room without exciting much attention, +and when there I found myself happily placed between Kate and Fanny. + +“I never knew anything so awkward,” said Fanny; “I declare I can’t +conceive what has come to our old servant Larry. He’s generally the most +precise person in the world, and now he is nearly an hour late—and then +he tumbles down in the hall.” + +“I am afraid I am responsible for the delay,” said I. + +“But not for the tumble I suppose,” said Kate from the other side. I +felt that I blushed up to the eyes, but I did not dare to enter into +explanations. + +“Tom,” said Tizzy, addressing her father across the table, “I hope you +had a good run to-day.” It did seem odd to me that young lady should +call her father Tom, but such was the fact. + +“Well; pretty well,” said Mr. O’Conor. + +“And I hope you were up with the hounds.” + +“You may ask Mr. Green that. He at any rate was with them, and therefore +he can tell you.” + +“Oh, he wasn’t before you, I know. No Englishman could get before you;—I +am quite sure of that.” + +“Don’t you be impertinent, miss,” said Kate. “You can easily see, Mr. +Green, that papa spoils my sister Eliza.” + +“Do you hunt in top-boots, Mr. Green?” said Tizzy. + +To this I made no answer. She would have drawn me into a conversation +about my feet in half a minute, and the slightest allusion to the subject +threw me into a fit of perspiration. + +“Are you fond of hunting, Miss O’Conor?” asked I, blindly hurrying into +any other subject of conversation. + +Miss O’Conor owned that she was fond of hunting—just a little; only papa +would not allow it. When the hounds met anywhere within reach of Castle +Conor, she and Kate would ride out to look at them; and if papa was not +there that day,—an omission of rare occurrence,—they would ride a few +fields with the hounds. + +“But he lets Tizzy keep with them the whole day,” said she, whispering. + +“And has Tizzy a pony of her own?” + +“Oh yes, Tizzy has everything. She’s papa’s pet, you know.” + +“And whose pet are you?” I asked. + +“Oh—I am nobody’s pet, unless sometimes Jack makes a pet of me when he’s +in a good humour. Do you make pets of your sisters, Mr. Green?” + +“I have none. But if I had I should not make pets of them.” + +“Not of your own sisters?” + +“No. As for myself, I’d sooner make a pet of my friend’s sister; a great +deal.” + +“How very unnatural,” said Miss O’Conor, with the prettiest look of +surprise imaginable. + +“Not at all unnatural I think,” said I, looking tenderly and lovingly +into her face. Where does one find girls so pretty, so easy, so sweet, +so talkative as the Irish girls? And then with all their talking and all +their ease who ever hears of their misbehaving? They certainly love +flirting, as they also love dancing. But they flirt without mischief and +without malice. + +I had now quite forgotten my misfortune, and was beginning to think how +well I should like to have Fanny O’Conor for my wife. In this frame of +mind I was bending over towards her as a servant took away a plate from +the other side, when a sepulchral note sounded in my ear. It was like +the memento mori of the old Roman;—as though some one pointed in the +midst of my bliss to the sword hung over my head by a thread. It was the +voice of Larry, whispering in his agony just above my head— + +“They’s disthroying my poor feet intirely, intirely; so they is! I can’t +bear it much longer, yer honer.” I had committed murder like Macbeth; +and now my Banquo had come to disturb me at my feast. + +“What is it he says to you?” asked Fanny. + +“Oh nothing,” I answered, once more in my misery. + +“There seems to be some point of confidence between you and our Larry,” +she remarked. + +“Oh no,” said I, quite confused; “not at all.” + +“You need not be ashamed of it. Half the gentlemen in the county have +their confidences with Larry;—and some of the ladies too, I can tell you. +He was born in this house, and never lived anywhere else; and I am sure +he has a larger circle of acquaintance than any one else in it.” + +I could not recover my self-possession for the next ten minutes. +Whenever Larry was on our side of the table I was afraid he was coming to +me with another agonised whisper. When he was opposite, I could not but +watch him as he hobbled in his misery. It was evident that the boots +were too tight for him, and had they been made throughout of iron they +could not have been less capable of yielding to the feet. I pitied him +from the bottom of my heart. And I pitied myself also, wishing that I +was well in bed upstairs with some feigned malady, so that Larry might +have had his own again. + +And then for a moment I missed him from the room. He had doubtless gone +to relieve his tortured feet in the servants’ hall, and as he did so was +cursing my cruelty. But what mattered it? Let him curse. If he would +only stay away and do that, I would appease his wrath when we were alone +together with pecuniary satisfaction. + +But there was no such rest in store for me. “Larry, Larry,” shouted Mr. +O’Conor, “where on earth has the fellow gone to?” They were all cousins +at the table except myself, and Mr. O’Conor was not therefore restrained +by any feeling of ceremony. “There is something wrong with that fellow +to-day; what is it, Jack?” + +“Upon my word, sir, I don’t know,” said Jack. + +“I think he must be tipsy,” whispered Miss O’Conor, the maiden sister, +who always sat at her brother’s left hand. But a whisper though it was, +it was audible all down the table. + +“No, ma’am; it aint dhrink at all,” said the coachman. “It is his feet +as does it.” + +“His feet!” shouted Tom O’Conor. + +“Yes; I know it’s his feet,” said that horrid Tizzy. “He’s got on great +thick nailed shoes. It was that that made him tumble down in the hall.” + +I glanced at each side of me, and could see that there was a certain +consciousness expressed in the face of each of my two neighbours;—on +Kate’s mouth there was decidedly a smile, or rather, perhaps, the +slightest possible inclination that way; whereas on Fanny’s part I +thought I saw something like a rising sorrow at my distress. So at least +I flattered myself. + +“Send him back into the room immediately,” said Tom, who looked at me as +though he had some consciousness that I had introduced all this confusion +into his household. What should I do? Would it not be best for me to +make clean breast of it before them all? But alas! I lacked the +courage. + +The coachman went out, and we were left for five minutes without any +servant, and Mr. O’Conor the while became more and more savage. I +attempted to say a word to Fanny, but failed. Vox faucibus haesit. + +“I don’t think he has got any others,” said Tizzy—“at least none others +left.” + +On the whole I am glad I did not marry into the family, as I could not +have endured that girl to stay in my house as a sister-in-law. + +“Where the d— has that other fellow gone to?” said Tom. “Jack, do go out +and see what is the matter. If anybody is drunk send for me.” + +“Oh, there is nobody drunk,” said Tizzy. + +Jack went out, and the coachman returned; but what was done and said I +hardly remember. The whole room seemed to swim round and round, and as +far as I can recollect the company sat mute, neither eating nor drinking. +Presently Jack returned. + +“It’s all right,” said he. I always liked Jack. At the present moment +he just looked towards me and laughed slightly. + +“All right?” said Tom. “But is the fellow coming?” + +“We can do with Richard, I suppose,” said Jack. + +“No—I can’t do with Richard,” said the father. “And will know what it +all means. Where is that fellow Larry?” + +Larry had been standing just outside the door, and now he entered gently +as a mouse. No sound came from his footfall, nor was there in his face +that look of pain which it had worn for the last fifteen minutes. But he +was not the less abashed, frightened and unhappy. + +“What is all this about, Larry?” said his master, turning to him. “I +insist upon knowing.” + +“Och thin, Mr. Green, yer honer, I wouldn’t be afther telling agin yer +honer; indeed I wouldn’t thin, av’ the masther would only let me hould my +tongue.” And he looked across at me, deprecating my anger. + +“Mr. Green!” said Mr. O’Conor. + +“Yes, yer honer. It’s all along of his honer’s thick shoes;” and Larry, +stepping backwards towards the door, lifted them up from some corner, and +coming well forward, exposed them with the soles uppermost to the whole +table. + +“And that’s not all, yer honer; but they’ve squoze the very toes of me +into a jelly.” + +There was now a loud laugh, in which Jack and Peter and Fanny and Kate +and Tizzy all joined; as too did Mr. O’Conor—and I also myself after a +while. + +“Whose boots are they?” demanded Miss O’Conor senior, with her severest +tone and grimmest accent. + +“’Deed then and the divil may have them for me, Miss,” answered Larry. +“They war Mr. Green’s, but the likes of him won’t wear them agin afther +the likes of me—barring he wanted them very particular,” added he, +remembering his own pumps. + +I began muttering something, feeling that the time had come when I must +tell the tale. But Jack with great good nature, took up the story and +told it so well, that I hardly suffered in the telling. + +“And that’s it,” said Tom O’Conor, laughing till I thought he would have +fallen from his chair. “So you’ve got Larry’s shoes on—” + +“And very well he fills them,” said Jack. + +“And it’s his honer that’s welcome to ’em,” said Larry, grinning from ear +to ear now that he saw that “the masther” was once more in a good humour. + +“I hope they’ll be nice shoes for dancing,” said Kate. + +“Only there’s one down at the heel I know,” said Tizzy. + +“The servant’s shoes!” This was an exclamation made by the maiden lady, +and intended apparently only for her brother’s ear. But it was clearly +audible by all the party. + +“Better that than no dinner,” said Peter. + +“But what are you to do about the dancing?” said Fanny, with an air of +dismay on her face which flattered me with an idea that she did care +whether I danced or no. + +In the mean time Larry, now as happy as an emperor, was tripping round +the room without any shoes to encumber him as he withdrew the plates from +the table. + +“And it’s his honer that’s welcome to ’em,” said he again, as he pulled +off the table-cloth with a flourish. “And why wouldn’t he, and he able +to folly the hounds betther nor any Englishman that iver war in these +parts before,—anyways so Mick says!” + +Now Mick was the huntsman, and this little tale of eulogy from Larry went +far towards easing my grief. I had ridden well to the hounds that day, +and I knew it. + +There was nothing more said about the shoes, and I was soon again at my +ease, although Miss O’Conor did say something about the impropriety of +Larry walking about in his stocking feet. The ladies however soon +withdrew,—to my sorrow, for I was getting on swimmingly with Fanny; and +then we gentlemen gathered round the fire and filled our glasses. + +In about ten minutes a very light tap was heard, the door was opened to +the extent of three inches, and a female voice which I readily recognised +called to Jack. + +Jack went out, and in a second or two put his head back into the room and +called to me—“Green,” he said, “just step here moment, there’s a good +fellow.” I went out, and there I found Fanny standing with her brother. + +“Here are the girls at their wits’ ends,” said he, “about your dancing. +So Fanny has put a boy upon one of the horse and proposes that you should +send another line to Mrs. Meehan at Ballyglass. It’s only ten miles, and +he’ll be back in two hours.” + +I need hardly say that I acted in conformity with this advice, I went +into Mr. O’Conor’s book room, with Jack and his sister, and there +scribbled a note. I was delightful to feel how intimate I was with them, +and how anxious they were to make me happy. + +“And we won’t begin till they come,” said Fanny. + +“Oh, Miss O’Conor, pray don’t wait,” said I. + +“Oh, but we will,” she answered. “You have your wine to drink, and then +there’s the tea; and then we’ll have a song two. I’ll spin it out; see +if I don’t.” And so we went to the front door where the boy was already +on his horse—her own nag as I afterwards found. + +“And Patsey,” said she, “ride for your life; and Patsey, whatever you do, +don’t come back without Mr. Green’s pumps—his dancing-shoes you know.” + +And in about two hours the pumps did arrive; and I don’t think I ever +spent a pleasanter evening or got more satisfaction out of a pair of +shoes. They had not been two minutes on my feet before Larry was +carrying a tray of negus across the room in those which I had worn at +dinner. + +“The Dillon girls are going to stay here,” said Fanny as I wished her +good night at two o’clock. “And we’ll have dancing every evening as long +as you remain.” + +“But I shall leave to-morrow,” said I. + +“Indeed you won’t. Papa will take care of that.” + +And so he did. “You had better go over to Ballyglass yourself +to-morrow,” said he, “and collect your own things. There’s no knowing +else what you may have to borrow of Larry.” + +I stayed there three weeks, and in the middle of the third I thought that +everything would be arranged between me and Fanny. But the aunt +interfered; and in about a twelvemonth after my adventures she consented +to make a more fortunate man happy for his life. + + + + +***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE O'CONORS OF CASTLE CONOR*** + + +******* This file should be named 3616-0.txt or 3616-0.zip ******* + + +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: +http://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/3/6/1/3616 + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will +be renamed. + +Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright +law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, +so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United +States without permission and without paying copyright +royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part +of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm +concept and trademark. 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You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of +the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at +www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have +to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. + + + + +Title: The O'Conors of Castle Conor + + +Author: Anthony Trollope + + + +Release Date: January 16, 2015 [eBook #3616] +[This file was first posted on June 15, 2001] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII) + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE O'CONORS OF CASTLE CONOR*** +</pre> +<p>Transcribed from the 1864 Chapman & Hall “Tales of +All Countries” edition by David Price, email +ccx074@pglaf.org</p> +<h1>THE O’CONORS OF CASTLE CONOR, COUNTY MAYO.</h1> +<p>I <span class="smcap">shall</span> never forget my first +introduction to country life in Ireland, my first day’s +hunting there, or the manner in which I passed the evening +afterwards. Nor shall I ever cease to be grateful for the +hospitality which I received from the O’Conors of Castle +Conor. My acquaintance with the family was first made in +the following manner. But before I begin my story, let me +inform my reader that my name is Archibald Green.</p> +<p>I had been for a fortnight in Dublin, and was about to proceed +into county Mayo on business which would occupy me there for some +weeks. My head-quarters would, I found, be at the town of +Ballyglass; and I soon learned that Ballyglass was not a place in +which I should find hotel accommodation of a luxurious kind, or +much congenial society indigenous to the place itself.</p> +<p>“But you are a hunting man, you say,” said old Sir +P— C—; “and in that case you will soon know Tom +O’Conor. Tom won’t let you be dull. +I’d write you a letter to Tom, only he’ll certainly +make you out without my taking the trouble.”</p> +<p>I did think at the time that the old baronet might have +written the letter for me, as he had been a friend of my +father’s in former days; but he did not, and I started for +Ballyglass with no other introduction to any one in the county +than that contained in Sir P—’s promise that I should +soon know Mr. Thomas O’Conor.</p> +<p>I had already provided myself with a horse, groom, saddle and +bridle, and these I sent down, en avant, that the Ballyglassians +might know that I was somebody. Perhaps, before I arrived +Tom O’Conor might learn that a hunting man was coming into +the neighbourhood, and I might find at the inn a polite note +intimating that a bed was at my service at Castle Conor. I +had heard so much of the free hospitality of the Irish gentry as +to imagine that such a thing might be possible.</p> +<p>But I found nothing of the kind. Hunting gentlemen in +those days were very common in county Mayo, and one horse was no +great evidence of a man’s standing in the world. Men +there as I learnt afterwards, are sought for themselves quite as +much as they are elsewhere; and though my groom’s top-boots +were neat, and my horse a very tidy animal, my entry into +Ballyglass created no sensation whatever.</p> +<p>In about four days after my arrival, when I was already +infinitely disgusted with the little Pot-house in which I was +forced to stay, and had made up my mind that the people in county +Mayo were a churlish set, I sent my horse on to a meet of the +fox-hounds, and followed after myself on an open car.</p> +<p>No one but an erratic fox-hunter such as I am,—a +fox-hunter, I mean, whose lot it has been to wander about from +one pack of hounds to another,—can understand the +melancholy feeling which a man has when he first intrudes +himself, unknown by any one, among an entirely new set of +sportsmen. When a stranger falls thus as it were out of the +moon into a hunt, it is impossible that men should not stare at +him and ask who he is. And it is so disagreeable to be +stared at, and to have such questions asked! This feeling +does not come upon a man in Leicestershire or Gloucestershire +where the numbers are large, and a stranger or two will always be +overlooked, but in small hunting fields it is so painful that a +man has to pluck up much courage before he encounters it.</p> +<p>We met on the morning in question at Bingham’s +Grove. There were not above twelve or fifteen men out, all +of whom, or nearly all were cousins to each other. They +seemed to be all Toms, and Pats, and Larrys, and Micks. I +was done up very knowingly in pink, and thought that I looked +quite the thing, but for two or three hours nobody noticed +me.</p> +<p>I had my eyes about me, however, and soon found out which of +them was Tom O’Conor. He was a fine-looking fellow, +thin and tall, but not largely made, with a piercing gray eye, +and a beautiful voice for speaking to a hound. He had two +sons there also, short, slight fellows, but exquisite +horsemen. I already felt that I had a kind of acquaintance +with the father, but I hardly knew on what ground to put in my +claim.</p> +<p>We had no sport early in the morning. It was a cold +bleak February day, with occasional storms of sleet. We +rode from cover to cover, but all in vain. “I am +sorry, sir, that we are to have such a bad day, as you are a +stranger here,” said one gentleman to me. This was +Jack O’Conor, Tom’s eldest son, my bosom friend for +many a year after. Poor Jack! I fear that the +Encumbered Estates Court sent him altogether adrift upon the +world.</p> +<p>“We may still have a run from Poulnaroe, if the +gentleman chooses to come on,” said a voice coming from +behind with a sharp trot. It was Tom O’Conor.</p> +<p>“Wherever the hounds go, I’ll follow,” said +I.</p> +<p>“Then come on to Poulnaroe,” said Mr. +O’Conor. I trotted on quickly by his side, and before +we reached the cover had managed to slip in something about Sir +P. C.</p> +<p>“What the deuce!” said he. “What! a +friend of Sir P—’s? Why the deuce didn’t +you tell me so? What are you doing down here? Where +are you staying?” &c. &c. &c.</p> +<p>At Poulnaroe we found a fox, but before we did so Mr. O’ +Conor had asked me over to Castle Conor. And this he did in +such a way that there was no possibility of refusing +him—or, I should rather say, of disobeying him. For +his invitation came quite in the tone of a command.</p> +<p>“You’ll come to us of course when the day is +over—and let me see; we’re near Ballyglass now, but +the run will be right away in our direction. Just send word +for them to send your things to Castle Conor.”</p> +<p>“But they’re all about, and unpacked,” said +I.</p> +<p>“Never mind. Write a note and say what you want +now, and go and get the rest to-morrow yourself. Here, +Patsey!—Patsey! run into Ballyglass for this gentleman at +once. Now don’t be long, for the chances are we shall +find here.” And then, after giving some further +hurried instructions he left me to write a line in pencil to the +innkeeper’s wife on the back of a ditch.</p> +<p>This I accordingly did. “Send my small +portmanteau,” I said, “and all my black dress +clothes, and shirts, and socks, and all that, and above all my +dressing things which are on the little table, and the satin +neck-handkerchief, and whatever you do, mind you send my +<i>pumps</i>;” and I underscored the latter word; for Jack +O’Conor, when his father left me, went on pressing the +invitation. “My sisters are going to get up a +dance,” said he; “and if you are fond of that kind of +things perhaps we can amuse you.” Now in those days I +was very fond of dancing—and very fond of young ladies too, +and therefore glad enough to learn that Tom O’Conor had +daughters as well as sons. On this account I was very +particular in underscoring the word pumps.</p> +<p>“And hurry, you young divil,” Jack O’Conor +said to Patsey.</p> +<p>“I have told him to take the portmanteau over on a +car,” said I.</p> +<p>“All right; then you’ll find it there on our +arrival.”</p> +<p>We had an excellent run, in which I may make bold to say that +I did not acquit myself badly. I stuck very close to the +hounds, as did the whole of the O’Conor brood; and when the +fellow contrived to earth himself, as he did, I received those +compliments on my horse, which is the most approved praise which +one fox-hunter ever gives to another.</p> +<p>“We’ll buy that fellow of you before we let you +go,” said Peter, the youngest son.</p> +<p>“I advise you to look sharp after your money if you sell +him to my brother,” said Jack.</p> +<p>And then we trotted slowly off to Castle Conor, which, +however, was by no means near to us. “We have ten +miles to go;—good Irish miles,” said the +father. “I don’t know that I ever remember a +fox from Poulnaroe taking that line before.”</p> +<p>“He wasn’t a Poulnaroe fox,” said Peter.</p> +<p>“I don’t know that;” said Jack; and then +they debated that question hotly.</p> +<p>Our horses were very tired, and it was late before we reached +Mr. O’Conor’s house. That getting home from +hunting with a thoroughly weary animal, who has no longer +sympathy or example to carry him on, is very tedious work. +In the present instance I had company with me; but when a man is +alone, when his horse toes at every ten steps, when the night is +dark and the rain pouring, and there are yet eight miles of road +to be conquered,—at such time a man is almost apt to swear +that he will give up hunting.</p> +<p>At last we were in the Castle Conor stable yard;—for we +had approached the house by some back way; and as we entered the +house by a door leading through a wilderness of back passages, +Mr. O’Conor said out loud, “Now, boys, remember I sit +down to dinner in twenty minutes.” And then turning +expressly to me, he laid his hand kindly upon my shoulder and +said, “I hope you will make yourself quite at home at +Castle Conor, and whatever you do, don’t keep us waiting +for dinner. You can dress in twenty minutes, I +suppose?”</p> +<p>“In ten!” said I, glibly.</p> +<p>“That’s well. Jack and Peter will show you +your room,” and so he turned away and left us.</p> +<p>My two young friends made their way into the great hall, and +thence into the drawing-room, and I followed them. We were +all dressed in pink, and had waded deep through bog and +mud. I did not exactly know whither I was being led in this +guise, but I soon found myself in the presence of two young +ladies, and of a girl about thirteen years of age.</p> +<p>“My sisters,” said Jack, introducing me very +laconically; “Miss O’Conor, Miss Kate O’Conor, +Miss Tizzy O’Conor.”</p> +<p>“My name is not Tizzy,” said the younger; +“it’s Eliza. How do you do, sir? I hope +you had a fine hunt! Was papa well up, Jack?”</p> +<p>Jack did not condescend to answer this question, but asked one +of the elder girls whether anything had come, and whether a room +had been made ready for me.</p> +<p>“Oh yes!” said Miss O’Conor; “they +came, I know, for I saw them brought into the house; and I hope +Mr. Green will find everything comfortable.” As she +said this I thought I saw a slight smile steal across her +remarkably pretty mouth.</p> +<p>They were both exceedingly pretty girls. Fanny the elder +wore long glossy curls,—for I write, oh reader, of bygone +days, as long ago as that, when ladies wore curls if it pleased +them so to do, and gentlemen danced in pumps, with black +handkerchiefs round their necks,—yes, long black, or nearly +black silken curls; and then she had such eyes;—I never +knew whether they were most wicked or most bright; and her face +was all dimples, and each dimple was laden with laughter and +laden with love. Kate was probably the prettier girl of the +two, but on the whole not so attractive. She was fairer +than her sister, and wore her hair in braids; and was also +somewhat more demure in her manner.</p> +<p>In spite of the special injunctions of Mr. O’Conor +senior, it was impossible not to loiter for five minutes over the +drawing-room fire talking to these houris—more especially +as I seemed to know them intimately by intuition before half of +the five minutes was over. They were so easy, so pretty, so +graceful, so kind, they seemed to take it so much as a matter of +course that I should stand there talking in my red coat and muddy +boots.</p> +<p>“Well; do go and dress yourselves,” at last said +Fanny, pretending to speak to her brothers but looking more +especially a me. “You know how mad papa will +be. And remember Mr. Green, we expect great things from +your dancing to-night. Your coming just at this time is +such a Godsend.” And again that soupçon of a +smile passed over her face.</p> +<p>I hurried up to my room, Peter and Jack coming with me to the +door. “Is everything right?” said Peter, +looking among the towels and water-jugs. +“They’ve given you a decent fire for a wonder,” +said Jack, stirring up the red hot turf which blazed in the +grate. “All right as a trivet,” said I. +“And look alive like a good fellow,” said Jack. +We had scowled at each other in the morning as very young men do +when they are strangers; and now, after a few hours, we were +intimate friends.</p> +<p>I immediately turned to my work, and was gratified to find +that all my things were laid out ready for dressing; my +portmanteau had of course come open, as my keys were in my +pocket, and therefore some of the excellent servants of the house +had been able to save me all the trouble of unpacking. +There was my shirt hanging before the fire; my black clothes were +spread upon the bed, my socks and collar and handkerchief beside +them; my brushes were on the toilet table, and everything +prepared exactly as though my own man had been there. How +nice!</p> +<p>I immediately went to work at getting off my spurs and boots, +and then proceeded to loosen the buttons at my knees. In +doing this I sat down in the arm-chair which had been drawn up +for me, opposite the fire. But what was the object on which +my eyes then fell;—the objects I should rather say!</p> +<p>Immediately in front of my chair was placed, just ready for +may feet, an enormous pair of shooting-boots—half-boots +made to lace up round the ankles, with thick double leather +soles, and each bearing half a stone of iron in the shape of +nails and heel-pieces. I had superintended the making of +these shoes in Burlington Arcade with the greatest +diligence. I was never a good shot; and, like some other +sportsmen, intended to make up for my deficiency in performance +by the excellence of my shooting apparel. “Those +nails are not large enough,” I had said; “nor nearly +large enough.” But when the boots came home they +struck even me as being too heavy, too metalsome. +“He, he, he,” laughed the boot boy as he turned them +up for me to look at. It may therefore be imagined of what +nature were the articles which were thus set out for the +evening’s dancing.</p> +<p>And then the way in which they were placed! When I saw +this the conviction flew across my mind like a flash of lightning +that the preparation had been made under other eyes than those of +the servant. The heavy big boots were placed so prettily +before the chair, and the strings of each were made to dangle +down at the sides, as though just ready for tying! They +seemed to say, the boots did, “Now, make haste. We at +any rate are ready—you cannot say that you were kept +waiting for us.” No mere servant’s hand had +ever enabled a pair of boots to laugh at one so completely.</p> +<p>But what was I to do? I rushed at the small portmanteau, +thinking that my pumps also might be there. The woman +surely could not have been such a fool as to send me those tons +of iron for my evening wear! But, alas, alas! no pumps were +there. There was nothing else in the way of covering for my +feet; not even a pair of slippers.</p> +<p>And now what was I to do? The absolute magnitude of my +misfortune only loomed upon me by degrees. The twenty +minutes allowed by that stern old paterfamilias were already gone +and I had done nothing towards dressing. And indeed it was +impossible that I should do anything that would be of +avail. I could not go down to dinner in my stocking feet, +nor could I put on my black dress trousers, over a pair of +mud-painted top-boots. As for those iron-soled +horrors—; and then I gave one of them a kick with the side +of my bare foot which sent it half way under the bed.</p> +<p>But what was I to do? I began washing myself and +brushing my hair with this horrid weight upon my mind. My +first plan was to go to bed, and send down word that I had been +taken suddenly ill in the stomach; then to rise early in the +morning and get away unobserved. But by such a course of +action I should lose all chance of any further acquaintance with +those pretty girls! That they were already aware of the +extent of my predicament, and were now enjoying it—of that +I was quite sure.</p> +<p>What if I boldly put on the shooting-boots, and clattered down +to dinner in them? What if I took the bull by the horns, +and made, myself, the most of the joke? This might be very +well for the dinner, but it would be a bad joke for me when the +hour for dancing came. And, alas! I felt that I +lacked the courage. It is not every man that can walk down +to dinner, in a strange house full of ladies, wearing such boots +as those I have described.</p> +<p>Should I not attempt to borrow a pair? This, all the +world will say, should have been my first idea. But I have +not yet mentioned that I am myself a large-boned man, and that my +feet are especially well developed. I had never for a +moment entertained a hope that I should find any one in that +house whose boot I could wear. But at last I rang the +bell. I would send for Jack, and if everything failed, I +would communicate my grief to him.</p> +<p>I had to ring twice before anybody came. The servants, I +well knew, were putting the dinner on the table. At last a +man entered the room, dressed in rather shabby black, whom I +afterwards learned to be the butler.</p> +<p>“What is your name, my friend?” said I, determined +to make an ally of the man.</p> +<p>“My name? Why Larry sure, yer honer. And the +masther is out of his sinses in a hurry, becase yer honer +don’t come down.”</p> +<p>“Is he though? Well now, Larry; tell me this; +which of all the gentlemen in the house has got the largest +foot?”</p> +<p>“Is it the largest foot, yer honer?” said Larry, +altogether surprised by my question.</p> +<p>“Yes; the largest foot,” and then I proceeded to +explain to him my misfortune. He took up first my top-boot, +and then the shooting-boot—in looking at which he gazed +with wonder at the nails;—and then he glanced at my feet, +measuring them with his eye; and after this he pronounced his +opinion.</p> +<p>“Yer honer couldn’t wear a morsel of leather +belonging to ere a one of ’em, young or ould. There +niver was a foot like that yet among the +O’Conors.”</p> +<p>“But are there no strangers staying here?”</p> +<p>“There’s three or four on ’em come in to +dinner; but they’ll be wanting their own boots I’m +thinking. And there’s young Misther Dillon; +he’s come to stay. But Lord love you—” +and he again looked at the enormous extent which lay between the +heel and the toe of the shooting apparatus which he still held in +his hand. “I niver see such a foot as that in the +whole barony,” he said, “barring my own.”</p> +<p>Now Larry was a large man, much larger altogether than myself, +and as he said this I looked down involuntarily at his feet; or +rather at his foot, for as he stood I could only see one. +And then a sudden hope filled my heart. On that foot there +glittered a shoe—not indeed such as were my own which were +now resting ingloriously at Ballyglass while they were so sorely +needed at Castle Conor; but one which I could wear before ladies, +without shame—and in my present frame of mind with infinite +contentment.</p> +<p>“Let me look at that one of your own,” said I to +the man, as though it were merely a subject for experimental +inquiry. Larry, accustomed to obedience, took off the shoe +and handed it to me.</p> +<p>My own foot was immediately in it, and I found that it fitted +me like a glove.</p> +<p>“And now the other,” said I—not smiling, for +a smile would have put him on his guard; but somewhat sternly, so +that that habit of obedience should not desert him at this +perilous moment. And then I stretched out my hand.</p> +<p>“But yer honer can’t keep ’em, you +know,” said he. “I haven’t the ghost of +another shoe to my feet.” But I only looked more +sternly than before, and still held out my hand. Custom +prevailed. Larry stooped down slowly, looking at me the +while, and pulling off the other slipper handed it to me with +much hesitation. Alas! as I put it to my foot I found that +it was old, and worn, and irredeemably down at heel;—that +it was in fact no counterpart at all to that other one which was +to do duty as its fellow. But nevertheless I put my foot +into it, and felt that a descent to the drawing-room was now +possible.</p> +<p>“But yer honer will give ’em back to a poor +man?” said Larry almost crying. “The +masther’s mad this minute becase the dinner’s not +up. Glory to God, only listhen to that!” And as +he spoke a tremendous peal rang out from some bell down stairs +that had evidently been shaken by an angry hand.</p> +<p>“Larry,” said I—and I endeavoured to assume +a look of very grave importance as I spoke—“I look to +you to assist me in this matter.”</p> +<p>“Och—wirra sthrue then, and will you let me go? +just listhen to that,” and another angry peal rang out, +loud and repeated.</p> +<p>“If you do as I ask you,” I continued, “you +shall be well rewarded. Look here; look at these +boots,” and I held up the shooting-shoes new from +Burlington Arcade. “They cost thirty +shillings—thirty shillings! and I will give them to you for +the loan of this pair of slippers.”</p> +<p>“They’d be no use at all to me, yer honer; not the +laist use in life.”</p> +<p>“You could do with them very well for to-night, and then +you could sell them. And here are ten shillings +besides,” and I held out half a sovereign which the poor +fellow took into his hand.</p> +<p>I waited no further parley but immediately walked out of the +room. With one foot I was sufficiently pleased. As +regarded that I felt that I had overcome my difficulty. But +the other was not so satisfactory. Whenever I attempted to +lift it from the ground the horrid slipper would fall off, or +only just hang by the toe. As for dancing, that would be +out of the question.</p> +<p>“Och, murther, murther,” sang out Larry, as he +heard me going down stairs. “What will I do at +all? Tare and ’ounds; there, he’s at it agin, +as mad as blazes.” This last exclamation had +reference to another peal which was evidently the work of the +master’s hand.</p> +<p>I confess I was not quite comfortable as I walked down +stairs. In the first place I was nearly half an hour late, +and I knew from the vigour of the peals that had sounded that my +slowness had already been made the subject of strong +remarks. And then my left shoe went flop, flop, on every +alternate step of the stairs. By no exertion of my foot in +the drawing up of my toe could I induce it to remain permanently +fixed upon my foot. But over and above and worse than all +this was the conviction strong upon my mind that I should become +a subject of merriment to the girls as soon as I entered the +room. They would understand the cause of my distress, and +probably at this moment were expecting to hear me clatter through +the stone hall with those odious metal boots.</p> +<p>However, I hurried down and entered the drawing-room, +determined to keep my position near the door, so that I might +have as little as possible to do on entering and as little as +possible in going out. But I had other difficulties in +store for me. I had not as yet been introduced to Mrs. +O’Conor; nor to Miss O’Conor, the squire’s +unmarried sister.</p> +<p>“Upon my word I thought you were never coming,” +said Mr. O’Conor as soon as he saw me. “It is +just one hour since we entered the house. Jack, I wish you +would find out what has come to that fellow Larry,” and +again he rang the bell. He was too angry, or it might be +too impatient to go through the ceremony of introducing me to +anybody.</p> +<p>I saw that the two girls looked at me very sharply, but I +stood at the back of an arm-chair so that no one could see my +feet. But that little imp Tizzy walked round deliberately, +looked at my heels, and then walked back again. It was +clear that she was in the secret.</p> +<p>There were eight or ten people in the room, but I was too much +fluttered to notice well who they were.</p> +<p>“Mamma,” said Miss O’Conor, “let me +introduce Mr. Green to you.”</p> +<p>It luckily happened that Mrs. O’Conor was on the same +side of the fire as myself, and I was able to take the hand which +she offered me without coming round into the middle of the +circle. Mrs. O’Conor was a little woman, apparently +not of much importance in the world, but, if one might judge from +first appearance, very good-natured.</p> +<p>“And my aunt Die, Mr. Green,” said Kate, pointing +to a very straight-backed, grim-looking lady, who occupied a +corner of a sofa, on the opposite side of the hearth. I +knew that politeness required that I should walk across the room +and make acquaintance with her. But under the existing +circumstances how was I to obey the dictates of politeness? +I was determined therefore to stand my ground, and merely bowed +across the room at Miss O’Conor. In so doing I made +an enemy who never deserted me during the whole of my intercourse +with the family. But for her, who knows who might have been +sitting opposite to me as I now write?</p> +<p>“Upon my word, Mr. Green, the ladies will expect much +from an Adonis who takes so long over his toilet,” said Tom +O’Conor in that cruel tone of banter which he knew so well +how to use.</p> +<p>“You forget, father, that men in London can’t jump +in and out of their clothes as quick as we wild Irishmen,” +said Jack.</p> +<p>“Mr. Green knows that we expect a great deal from him +this evening. I hope you polk well, Mr. Green,” said +Kate.</p> +<p>I muttered something about never dancing, but I knew that that +which I said was inaudible.</p> +<p>“I don’t think Mr. Green will dance,” said +Tizzy; “at least not much.” The impudence of +that child was, I think, unparalleled by any that I have ever +witnessed.</p> +<p>“But in the name of all that’s holy, why +don’t we have dinner?” And Mr. O’Conor +thundered at the door. “Larry, Larry, Larry!” +he screamed.</p> +<p>“Yes, yer honer, it’ll be all right in two +seconds,” answered Larry, from some bottomless abyss. +“Tare an’ ages; what’ll I do at all,” I +heard him continuing, as he made his way into the hall. Oh +what a clatter he made upon the pavement,—for it was all +stone! And how the drops of perspiration stood upon my brow +as I listened to him!</p> +<p>And then there was a pause, for the man had gone into the +dining-room. I could see now that Mr. O’Conor was +becoming very angry, and Jack the eldest son—oh, how often +he and I have laughed over all this since—left the +drawing-room for the second time. Immediately afterwards +Larry’s footsteps were again heard, hurrying across the +hall, and then there was a great slither, and an exclamation, and +the noise of a fall—and I could plainly hear poor +Larry’s head strike against the stone floor.</p> +<p>“Ochone, ochone!” he cried at the top of his +voice—“I’m murthered with ’em now +intirely; and d— ’em for boots—St. Peter be +good to me.”</p> +<p>There was a general rush into the hall, and I was carried with +the stream. The poor fellow who had broken his head would +be sure to tell how I had robbed him of his shoes. The +coachman was already helping him up, and Peter good-naturedly +lent a hand.</p> +<p>“What on earth is the matter?” said Mr. +O’Conor.</p> +<p>“He must be tipsy,” whispered Miss O’Conor, +the maiden sister.</p> +<p>“I aint tipsy at all thin,” said Larry, getting up +and rubbing the back of his head, and sundry other parts of his +body. “Tipsy indeed!” And then he added +when he was quite upright, “The dinner is sarved—at +last.”</p> +<p>And he bore it all without telling! “I’ll +give that fellow a guinea to-morrow morning,” said I to +myself—“if it’s the last that I have in the +world.”</p> +<p>I shall never forget the countenance of the Miss +O’Conors as Larry scrambled up cursing the unfortunate +boots—“What on earth has he got on?” said Mr. +O’Conor.</p> +<p>“Sorrow take ’em for shoes,” ejaculated +Larry. But his spirit was good and he said not a word to +betray me.</p> +<p>We all then went in to dinner how we best could. It was +useless for us to go back into the drawing-room, that each might +seek his own partner. Mr. O’Conor “the +masther,” not caring much for the girls who were around +him, and being already half beside himself with the confusion and +delay, led the way by himself. I as a stranger should have +given my arm to Mrs. O’Conor; but as it was I took her +eldest daughter instead, and contrived to shuffle along into the +dining-room without exciting much attention, and when there I +found myself happily placed between Kate and Fanny.</p> +<p>“I never knew anything so awkward,” said Fanny; +“I declare I can’t conceive what has come to our old +servant Larry. He’s generally the most precise person +in the world, and now he is nearly an hour late—and then he +tumbles down in the hall.”</p> +<p>“I am afraid I am responsible for the delay,” said +I.</p> +<p>“But not for the tumble I suppose,” said Kate from +the other side. I felt that I blushed up to the eyes, but I +did not dare to enter into explanations.</p> +<p>“Tom,” said Tizzy, addressing her father across +the table, “I hope you had a good run to-day.” +It did seem odd to me that young lady should call her father Tom, +but such was the fact.</p> +<p>“Well; pretty well,” said Mr. O’Conor.</p> +<p>“And I hope you were up with the hounds.”</p> +<p>“You may ask Mr. Green that. He at any rate was +with them, and therefore he can tell you.”</p> +<p>“Oh, he wasn’t before you, I know. No +Englishman could get before you;—I am quite sure of +that.”</p> +<p>“Don’t you be impertinent, miss,” said +Kate. “You can easily see, Mr. Green, that papa +spoils my sister Eliza.”</p> +<p>“Do you hunt in top-boots, Mr. Green?” said +Tizzy.</p> +<p>To this I made no answer. She would have drawn me into a +conversation about my feet in half a minute, and the slightest +allusion to the subject threw me into a fit of perspiration.</p> +<p>“Are you fond of hunting, Miss O’Conor?” +asked I, blindly hurrying into any other subject of +conversation.</p> +<p>Miss O’Conor owned that she was fond of +hunting—just a little; only papa would not allow it. +When the hounds met anywhere within reach of Castle Conor, she +and Kate would ride out to look at them; and if papa was not +there that day,—an omission of rare occurrence,—they +would ride a few fields with the hounds.</p> +<p>“But he lets Tizzy keep with them the whole day,” +said she, whispering.</p> +<p>“And has Tizzy a pony of her own?”</p> +<p>“Oh yes, Tizzy has everything. She’s +papa’s pet, you know.”</p> +<p>“And whose pet are you?” I asked.</p> +<p>“Oh—I am nobody’s pet, unless sometimes Jack +makes a pet of me when he’s in a good humour. Do you +make pets of your sisters, Mr. Green?”</p> +<p>“I have none. But if I had I should not make pets +of them.”</p> +<p>“Not of your own sisters?”</p> +<p>“No. As for myself, I’d sooner make a pet of +my friend’s sister; a great deal.”</p> +<p>“How very unnatural,” said Miss O’Conor, +with the prettiest look of surprise imaginable.</p> +<p>“Not at all unnatural I think,” said I, looking +tenderly and lovingly into her face. Where does one find +girls so pretty, so easy, so sweet, so talkative as the Irish +girls? And then with all their talking and all their ease +who ever hears of their misbehaving? They certainly love +flirting, as they also love dancing. But they flirt without +mischief and without malice.</p> +<p>I had now quite forgotten my misfortune, and was beginning to +think how well I should like to have Fanny O’Conor for my +wife. In this frame of mind I was bending over towards her +as a servant took away a plate from the other side, when a +sepulchral note sounded in my ear. It was like the memento +mori of the old Roman;—as though some one pointed in the +midst of my bliss to the sword hung over my head by a +thread. It was the voice of Larry, whispering in his agony +just above my head—</p> +<p>“They’s disthroying my poor feet intirely, +intirely; so they is! I can’t bear it much longer, +yer honer.” I had committed murder like Macbeth; and +now my Banquo had come to disturb me at my feast.</p> +<p>“What is it he says to you?” asked Fanny.</p> +<p>“Oh nothing,” I answered, once more in my +misery.</p> +<p>“There seems to be some point of confidence between you +and our Larry,” she remarked.</p> +<p>“Oh no,” said I, quite confused; “not at +all.”</p> +<p>“You need not be ashamed of it. Half the gentlemen +in the county have their confidences with Larry;—and some +of the ladies too, I can tell you. He was born in this +house, and never lived anywhere else; and I am sure he has a +larger circle of acquaintance than any one else in it.”</p> +<p>I could not recover my self-possession for the next ten +minutes. Whenever Larry was on our side of the table I was +afraid he was coming to me with another agonised whisper. +When he was opposite, I could not but watch him as he hobbled in +his misery. It was evident that the boots were too tight +for him, and had they been made throughout of iron they could not +have been less capable of yielding to the feet. I pitied +him from the bottom of my heart. And I pitied myself also, +wishing that I was well in bed upstairs with some feigned malady, +so that Larry might have had his own again.</p> +<p>And then for a moment I missed him from the room. He had +doubtless gone to relieve his tortured feet in the +servants’ hall, and as he did so was cursing my +cruelty. But what mattered it? Let him curse. +If he would only stay away and do that, I would appease his wrath +when we were alone together with pecuniary satisfaction.</p> +<p>But there was no such rest in store for me. +“Larry, Larry,” shouted Mr. O’Conor, +“where on earth has the fellow gone to?” They +were all cousins at the table except myself, and Mr. +O’Conor was not therefore restrained by any feeling of +ceremony. “There is something wrong with that fellow +to-day; what is it, Jack?”</p> +<p>“Upon my word, sir, I don’t know,” said +Jack.</p> +<p>“I think he must be tipsy,” whispered Miss +O’Conor, the maiden sister, who always sat at her +brother’s left hand. But a whisper though it was, it +was audible all down the table.</p> +<p>“No, ma’am; it aint dhrink at all,” said the +coachman. “It is his feet as does it.”</p> +<p>“His feet!” shouted Tom O’Conor.</p> +<p>“Yes; I know it’s his feet,” said that +horrid Tizzy. “He’s got on great thick nailed +shoes. It was that that made him tumble down in the +hall.”</p> +<p>I glanced at each side of me, and could see that there was a +certain consciousness expressed in the face of each of my two +neighbours;—on Kate’s mouth there was decidedly a +smile, or rather, perhaps, the slightest possible inclination +that way; whereas on Fanny’s part I thought I saw something +like a rising sorrow at my distress. So at least I +flattered myself.</p> +<p>“Send him back into the room immediately,” said +Tom, who looked at me as though he had some consciousness that I +had introduced all this confusion into his household. What +should I do? Would it not be best for me to make clean +breast of it before them all? But alas! I lacked the +courage.</p> +<p>The coachman went out, and we were left for five minutes +without any servant, and Mr. O’Conor the while became more +and more savage. I attempted to say a word to Fanny, but +failed. Vox faucibus haesit.</p> +<p>“I don’t think he has got any others,” said +Tizzy—“at least none others left.”</p> +<p>On the whole I am glad I did not marry into the family, as I +could not have endured that girl to stay in my house as a +sister-in-law.</p> +<p>“Where the d— has that other fellow gone +to?” said Tom. “Jack, do go out and see what is +the matter. If anybody is drunk send for me.”</p> +<p>“Oh, there is nobody drunk,” said Tizzy.</p> +<p>Jack went out, and the coachman returned; but what was done +and said I hardly remember. The whole room seemed to swim +round and round, and as far as I can recollect the company sat +mute, neither eating nor drinking. Presently Jack +returned.</p> +<p>“It’s all right,” said he. I always +liked Jack. At the present moment he just looked towards me +and laughed slightly.</p> +<p>“All right?” said Tom. “But is the +fellow coming?”</p> +<p>“We can do with Richard, I suppose,” said +Jack.</p> +<p>“No—I can’t do with Richard,” said the +father. “And will know what it all means. Where +is that fellow Larry?”</p> +<p>Larry had been standing just outside the door, and now he +entered gently as a mouse. No sound came from his footfall, +nor was there in his face that look of pain which it had worn for +the last fifteen minutes. But he was not the less abashed, +frightened and unhappy.</p> +<p>“What is all this about, Larry?” said his master, +turning to him. “I insist upon knowing.”</p> +<p>“Och thin, Mr. Green, yer honer, I wouldn’t be +afther telling agin yer honer; indeed I wouldn’t thin, +av’ the masther would only let me hould my +tongue.” And he looked across at me, deprecating my +anger.</p> +<p>“Mr. Green!” said Mr. O’Conor.</p> +<p>“Yes, yer honer. It’s all along of his +honer’s thick shoes;” and Larry, stepping backwards +towards the door, lifted them up from some corner, and coming +well forward, exposed them with the soles uppermost to the whole +table.</p> +<p>“And that’s not all, yer honer; but they’ve +squoze the very toes of me into a jelly.”</p> +<p>There was now a loud laugh, in which Jack and Peter and Fanny +and Kate and Tizzy all joined; as too did Mr. +O’Conor—and I also myself after a while.</p> +<p>“Whose boots are they?” demanded Miss +O’Conor senior, with her severest tone and grimmest +accent.</p> +<p>“’Deed then and the divil may have them for me, +Miss,” answered Larry. “They war Mr. +Green’s, but the likes of him won’t wear them agin +afther the likes of me—barring he wanted them very +particular,” added he, remembering his own pumps.</p> +<p>I began muttering something, feeling that the time had come +when I must tell the tale. But Jack with great good nature, +took up the story and told it so well, that I hardly suffered in +the telling.</p> +<p>“And that’s it,” said Tom O’Conor, +laughing till I thought he would have fallen from his +chair. “So you’ve got Larry’s shoes +on—”</p> +<p>“And very well he fills them,” said Jack.</p> +<p>“And it’s his honer that’s welcome to +’em,” said Larry, grinning from ear to ear now that +he saw that “the masther” was once more in a good +humour.</p> +<p>“I hope they’ll be nice shoes for dancing,” +said Kate.</p> +<p>“Only there’s one down at the heel I know,” +said Tizzy.</p> +<p>“The servant’s shoes!” This was an +exclamation made by the maiden lady, and intended apparently only +for her brother’s ear. But it was clearly audible by +all the party.</p> +<p>“Better that than no dinner,” said Peter.</p> +<p>“But what are you to do about the dancing?” said +Fanny, with an air of dismay on her face which flattered me with +an idea that she did care whether I danced or no.</p> +<p>In the mean time Larry, now as happy as an emperor, was +tripping round the room without any shoes to encumber him as he +withdrew the plates from the table.</p> +<p>“And it’s his honer that’s welcome to +’em,” said he again, as he pulled off the table-cloth +with a flourish. “And why wouldn’t he, and he +able to folly the hounds betther nor any Englishman that iver war +in these parts before,—anyways so Mick says!”</p> +<p>Now Mick was the huntsman, and this little tale of eulogy from +Larry went far towards easing my grief. I had ridden well +to the hounds that day, and I knew it.</p> +<p>There was nothing more said about the shoes, and I was soon +again at my ease, although Miss O’Conor did say something +about the impropriety of Larry walking about in his stocking +feet. The ladies however soon withdrew,—to my sorrow, +for I was getting on swimmingly with Fanny; and then we gentlemen +gathered round the fire and filled our glasses.</p> +<p>In about ten minutes a very light tap was heard, the door was +opened to the extent of three inches, and a female voice which I +readily recognised called to Jack.</p> +<p>Jack went out, and in a second or two put his head back into +the room and called to me—“Green,” he said, +“just step here moment, there’s a good +fellow.” I went out, and there I found Fanny standing +with her brother.</p> +<p>“Here are the girls at their wits’ ends,” +said he, “about your dancing. So Fanny has put a boy +upon one of the horse and proposes that you should send another +line to Mrs. Meehan at Ballyglass. It’s only ten +miles, and he’ll be back in two hours.”</p> +<p>I need hardly say that I acted in conformity with this advice, +I went into Mr. O’Conor’s book room, with Jack and +his sister, and there scribbled a note. I was delightful to +feel how intimate I was with them, and how anxious they were to +make me happy.</p> +<p>“And we won’t begin till they come,” said +Fanny.</p> +<p>“Oh, Miss O’Conor, pray don’t wait,” +said I.</p> +<p>“Oh, but we will,” she answered. “You +have your wine to drink, and then there’s the tea; and then +we’ll have a song two. I’ll spin it out; see if +I don’t.” And so we went to the front door +where the boy was already on his horse—her own nag as I +afterwards found.</p> +<p>“And Patsey,” said she, “ride for your life; +and Patsey, whatever you do, don’t come back without Mr. +Green’s pumps—his dancing-shoes you know.”</p> +<p>And in about two hours the pumps did arrive; and I don’t +think I ever spent a pleasanter evening or got more satisfaction +out of a pair of shoes. They had not been two minutes on my +feet before Larry was carrying a tray of negus across the room in +those which I had worn at dinner.</p> +<p>“The Dillon girls are going to stay here,” said +Fanny as I wished her good night at two o’clock. +“And we’ll have dancing every evening as long as you +remain.”</p> +<p>“But I shall leave to-morrow,” said I.</p> +<p>“Indeed you won’t. Papa will take care of +that.”</p> +<p>And so he did. “You had better go over to +Ballyglass yourself to-morrow,” said he, “and collect +your own things. There’s no knowing else what you may +have to borrow of Larry.”</p> +<p>I stayed there three weeks, and in the middle of the third I +thought that everything would be arranged between me and +Fanny. But the aunt interfered; and in about a twelvemonth +after my adventures she consented to make a more fortunate man +happy for his life.</p> +<p>***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE O'CONORS OF CASTLE CONOR***</p> +<pre> + + +***** This file should be named 3616-h.htm or 3616-h.zip****** + + +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: +http://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/3/6/1/3616 + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will +be renamed. + +Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright +law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, +so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United +States without permission and without paying copyright +royalties. 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FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.05/20/01*END* +[Portions of this header are copyright (C) 2001 by Michael S. Hart +and may be reprinted only when these Etexts are free of all fees.] +[Project Gutenberg is a TradeMark and may not be used in any sales +of Project Gutenberg Etexts or other materials be they hardware or +software or any other related product without express permission.] + + + + + +This etext was produced by David Price, email ccx074@coventry.ac.uk, +from the 1864 Chapman & Hall edition. + + + + + +THE O'CONORS OF CASTLE CONOR, COUNTY MAYO. +FROM "TALES FROM ALL COUNTRIES" + +by Anthony Trollope + + + + +I shall never forget my first introduction to country life in +Ireland, my first day's hunting there, or the manner in which I +passed the evening afterwards. Nor shall I ever cease to be grateful +for the hospitality which I received from the O'Conors of Castle +Conor. My acquaintance with the family was first made in the +following manner. But before I begin my story, let me inform my +reader that my name is Archibald Green. + +I had been for a fortnight in Dublin, and was about to proceed into +county Mayo on business which would occupy me there for some weeks. +My head-quarters would, I found, be at the town of Ballyglass; and I +soon learned that Ballyglass was not a place in which I should find +hotel accommodation of a luxurious kind, or much congenial society +indigenous to the place itself. + +"But you are a hunting man, you say," said old Sir P- C-; "and in +that case you will soon know Tom O'Conor. Tom won't let you be dull. +I'd write you a letter to Tom, only he'll certainly make you out +without my taking the trouble." + +I did think at the time that the old baronet might have written the +letter for me, as he had been a friend of my father's in former days; +but he did not, and I started for Ballyglass with no other +introduction to any one in the county than that contained in Sir P-'s +promise that I should soon know Mr. Thomas O'Conor. + +I had already provided myself with a horse, groom, saddle and bridle, +and these I sent down, en avant, that the Ballyglassians might know +that I was somebody. Perhaps, before I arrived Tom O'Conor might +learn that a hunting man was coming into the neighbourhood, and I +might find at the inn a polite note intimating that a bed was at my +service at Castle Conor. I had heard so much of the free hospitality +of the Irish gentry as to imagine that such a thing might be +possible. + +But I found nothing of the kind. Hunting gentlemen in those days +were very common in county Mayo, and one horse was no great evidence +of a man's standing in the world. Men there as I learnt afterwards, +are sought for themselves quite as much as they are elsewhere; and +though my groom's top-boots were neat, and my horse a very tidy +animal, my entry into Ballyglass created no sensation whatever. + +In about four days after my arrival, when I was already infinitely +disgusted with the little Pot-house in which I was forced to stay, +and had made up my mind that the people in county Mayo were a +churlish set, I sent my horse on to a meet of the fox-hounds, and +followed after myself on an open car. + +No one but an erratic fox-hunter such as I am,--a fox-hunter, I mean, +whose lot it has been to wander about from one pack of hounds to +another,--can understand the melancholy feeling which a man has when +he first intrudes himself, unknown by any one, among an entirely new +set of sportsmen. When a stranger falls thus as it were out of the +moon into a hunt, it is impossible that men should not stare at him +and ask who he is. And it is so disagreeable to be stared at, and to +have such questions asked! This feeling does not come upon a man in +Leicestershire or Gloucestershire where the numbers are large, and a +stranger or two will always be overlooked, but in small hunting +fields it is so painful that a man has to pluck up much courage +before he encounters it. + +We met on the morning in question at Bingham's Grove. There were not +above twelve or fifteen men out, all of whom, or nearly all were +cousins to each other. They seemed to be all Toms, and Pats, and +Larrys, and Micks. I was done up very knowingly in pink, and thought +that I looked quite the thing, but for two or three hours nobody +noticed me. + +I had my eyes about me, however, and soon found out which of them was +Tom O'Conor. He was a fine-looking fellow, thin and tall, but not +largely made, with a piercing gray eye, and a beautiful voice for +speaking to a hound. He had two sons there also, short, slight +fellows, but exquisite horsemen. I already felt that I had a kind of +acquaintance with the father, but I hardly knew on what ground to put +in my claim. + +We had no sport early in the morning. It was a cold bleak February +day, with occasional storms of sleet. We rode from cover to cover, +but all in vain. "I am sorry, sir, that we are to have such a bad +day, as you are a stranger here," said one gentleman to me. This was +Jack O'Conor, Tom's eldest son, my bosom friend for many a year +after. Poor Jack! I fear that the Encumbered Estates Court sent him +altogether adrift upon the world. + +"We may still have a run from Poulnaroe, if the gentleman chooses to +come on," said a voice coming from behind with a sharp trot. It was +Tom O'Conor. + +"Wherever the hounds go, I'll follow," said I. + +"Then come on to Poulnaroe," said Mr. O'Conor. I trotted on quickly +by his side, and before we reached the cover had managed to slip in +something about Sir P. C. + +"What the deuce!" said he. "What! a friend of Sir P-'s? Why the +deuce didn't you tell me so? What are you doing down here? Where +are you staying?" &c. &c. &c. + +At Poulnaroe we found a fox, but before we did so Mr. O' Conor had +asked me over to Castle Conor. And this he did in such a way that +there was no possibility of refusing him--or, I should rather say, of +disobeying him. For his invitation came quite in the tone of a +command. + +"You'll come to us of course when the day is over--and let me see; +we're near Ballyglass now, but the run will be right away in our +direction. Just send word for them to send your things to Castle +Conor." + +"But they're all about, and unpacked," said I. + +"Never mind. Write a note and say what you want now, and go and get +the rest to-morrow yourself. Here, Patsey!--Patsey! run into +Ballyglass for this gentleman at once. Now don't be long, for the +chances are we shall find here." And then, after giving some further +hurried instructions he left me to write a line in pencil to the +innkeeper's wife on the back of a ditch. + +This I accordingly did. "Send my small portmanteau," I said, "and +all my black dress clothes, and shirts, and socks, and all that, and +above all my dressing things which are on the little table, and the +satin neck-handkerchief, and whatever you do, mind you send my +PUMPS;" and I underscored the latter word; for Jack O'Conor, when his +father left me, went on pressing the invitation. "My sisters are +going to get up a dance," said he; "and if you are fond of that kind +of things perhaps we can amuse you." Now in those days I was very +fond of dancing--and very fond of young ladies too, and therefore +glad enough to learn that Tom O'Conor had daughters as well as sons. +On this account I was very particular in underscoring the word pumps. + +"And hurry, you young divil," Jack O'Conor said to Patsey. + +"I have told him to take the portmanteau over on a car," said I. + +"All right; then you'll find it there on our arrival." + +We had an excellent run, in which I may make bold to say that I did +not acquit myself badly. I stuck very close to the hounds, as did +the whole of the O'Conor brood; and when the fellow contrived to +earth himself, as he did, I received those compliments on my horse, +which is the most approved praise which one fox-hunter ever gives to +another. + +"We'll buy that fellow of you before we let you go," said Peter, the +youngest son. + +"I advise you to look sharp after your money if you sell him to my +brother," said Jack. + +And then we trotted slowly off to Castle Conor, which, however, was +by no means near to us. "We have ten miles to go;--good Irish +miles," said the father. "I don't know that I ever remember a fox +from Poulnaroe taking that line before." + +"He wasn't a Poulnaroe fox," said Peter. + +"I don't know that;" said Jack; and then they debated that question +hotly. + +Our horses were very tired, and it was late before we reached Mr. +O'Conor's house. That getting home from hunting with a thoroughly +weary animal, who has no longer sympathy or example to carry him on, +is very tedious work. In the present instance I had company with me; +but when a man is alone, when his horse toes at every ten steps, when +the night is dark and the rain pouring, and there are yet eight miles +of road to be conquered,--at such time a man is almost apt to swear +that he will give up hunting. + +At last we were in the Castle Conor stable yard;--for we had +approached the house by some back way; and as we entered the house by +a door leading through a wilderness of back passages, Mr. O'Conor +said out loud, "Now, boys, remember I sit down to dinner in twenty +minutes." And then turning expressly to me, he laid his hand kindly +upon my shoulder and said, "I hope you will make yourself quite at +home at Castle Conor, and whatever you do, don't keep us waiting for +dinner. You can dress in twenty minutes, I suppose?" + +"In ten!" said I, glibly. + +"That's well. Jack and Peter will show you your room," and so he +turned away and left us. + +My two young friends made their way into the great hall, and thence +into the drawing-room, and I followed them. We were all dressed in +pink, and had waded deep through bog and mud. I did not exactly know +whither I was being led in this guise, but I soon found myself in the +presence of two young ladies, and of a girl about thirteen years of +age. + +"My sisters," said Jack, introducing me very laconically; "Miss +O'Conor, Miss Kate O'Conor, Miss Tizzy O'Conor." + +"My name is not Tizzy," said the younger; "it's Eliza. How do you +do, sir? I hope you had a fine hunt! Was papa well up, Jack?" + +Jack did not condescend to answer this question, but asked one of the +elder girls whether anything had come, and whether a room had been +made ready for me. + +"Oh yes!" said Miss O'Conor; "they came, I know, for I saw them +brought into the house; and I hope Mr. Green will find everything +comfortable." As she said this I thought I saw a slight smile steal +across her remarkably pretty mouth. + +They were both exceedingly pretty girls. Fanny the elder wore long +glossy curls,--for I write, oh reader, of bygone days, as long ago as +that, when ladies wore curls if it pleased them so to do, and +gentlemen danced in pumps, with black handkerchiefs round their +necks,--yes, long black, or nearly black silken curls; and then she +had such eyes;--I never knew whether they were most wicked or most +bright; and her face was all dimples, and each dimple was laden with +laughter and laden with love. Kate was probably the prettier girl of +the two, but on the whole not so attractive. She was fairer than her +sister, and wore her hair in braids; and was also somewhat more +demure in her manner. + +In spite of the special injunctions of Mr. O'Conor senior, it was +impossible not to loiter for five minutes over the drawing-room fire +talking to these houris--more especially as I seemed to know them +intimately by intuition before half of the five minutes was over. +They were so easy, so pretty, so graceful, so kind, they seemed to +take it so much as a matter of course that I should stand there +talking in my red coat and muddy boots. + +"Well; do go and dress yourselves," at last said Fanny, pretending to +speak to her brothers but looking more especially a me. "You know +how mad papa will be. And remember Mr. Green, we expect great things +from your dancing to-night. Your coming just at this time is such a +Godsend." And again that soupcon of a smile passed over her face. + +I hurried up to my room, Peter and Jack coming with me to the door. +"Is everything right?" said Peter, looking among the towels and +water-jugs. "They've given you a decent fire for a wonder," said +Jack, stirring up the red hot turf which blazed in the grate. "All +right as a trivet," said I. "And look alive like a good fellow," +said Jack. We had scowled at each other in the morning as very young +men do when they are strangers; and now, after a few hours, we were +intimate friends. + +I immediately turned to my work, and was gratified to find that all +my things were laid out ready for dressing; my portmanteau had of +course come open, as my keys were in my pocket, and therefore some of +the excellent servants of the house had been able to save me all the +trouble of unpacking. There was my shirt hanging before the fire; my +black clothes were spread upon the bed, my socks and collar and +handkerchief beside them; my brushes were on the toilet table, and +everything prepared exactly as though my own man had been there. How +nice! + +I immediately went to work at getting off my spurs and boots, and +then proceeded to loosen the buttons at my knees. In doing this I +sat down in the arm-chair which had been drawn up for me, opposite +the fire. But what was the object on which my eyes then fell;--the +objects I should rather say! + +Immediately in front of my chair was placed, just ready for may feet, +an enormous pair of shooting-boots--half-boots made to lace up round +the ankles, with thick double leather soles, and each bearing half a +stone of iron in the shape of nails and heel-pieces. I had +superintended the making of these shoes in Burlington Arcade with the +greatest diligence. I was never a good shot; and, like some other +sportsmen, intended to make up for my deficiency in performance by +the excellence of my shooting apparel. "Those nails are not large +enough," I had said; "nor nearly large enough." But when the boots +came home they struck even me as being too heavy, too metalsome. +"He, he, he," laughed the boot boy as he turned them up for me to +look at. It may therefore be imagined of what nature were the +articles which were thus set out for the evening's dancing. + +And then the way in which they were placed! When I saw this the +conviction flew across my mind like a flash of lightning that the +preparation had been made under other eyes than those of the servant. +The heavy big boots were placed so prettily before the chair, and the +strings of each were made to dangle down at the sides, as though just +ready for tying! They seemed to say, the boots did, "Now, make +haste. We at any rate are ready--you cannot say that you were kept +waiting for us." No mere servant's hand had ever enabled a pair of +boots to laugh at one so completely. + +But what was I to do? I rushed at the small portmanteau, thinking +that my pumps also might be there. The woman surely could not have +been such a fool as to send me those tons of iron for my evening +wear! But, alas, alas! no pumps were there. There was nothing else +in the way of covering for my feet; not even a pair of slippers. + +And now what was I to do? The absolute magnitude of my misfortune +only loomed upon me by degrees. The twenty minutes allowed by that +stern old paterfamilias were already gone and I had done nothing +towards dressing. And indeed it was impossible that I should do +anything that would be of avail. I could not go down to dinner in my +stocking feet, nor could I put on my black dress trousers, over a +pair of mud-painted top-boots. As for those iron-soled horrors--; +and then I gave one of them a kick with the side of my bare foot +which sent it half way under the bed. + +But what was I to do? I began washing myself and brushing my hair +with this horrid weight upon my mind. My first plan was to go to +bed, and send down word that I had been taken suddenly ill in the +stomach; then to rise early in the morning and get away unobserved. +But by such a course of action I should lose all chance of any +further acquaintance with those pretty girls! That they were already +aware of the extent of my predicament, and were now enjoying it--of +that I was quite sure. + +What if I boldly put on the shooting-boots, and clattered down to +dinner in them? What if I took the bull by the horns, and made, +myself, the most of the joke? This might be very well for the +dinner, but it would be a bad joke for me when the hour for dancing +came. And, alas! I felt that I lacked the courage. It is not every +man that can walk down to dinner, in a strange house full of ladies, +wearing such boots as those I have described. + +Should I not attempt to borrow a pair? This, all the world will say, +should have been my first idea. But I have not yet mentioned that I +am myself a large-boned man, and that my feet are especially well +developed. I had never for a moment entertained a hope that I should +find any one in that house whose boot I could wear. But at last I +rang the bell. I would send for Jack, and if everything failed, I +would communicate my grief to him. + +I had to ring twice before anybody came. The servants, I well knew, +were putting the dinner on the table. At last a man entered the +room, dressed in rather shabby black, whom I afterwards learned to be +the butler. + +"What is your name, my friend?" said I, determined to make an ally of +the man. + +"My name? Why Larry sure, yer honer. And the masther is out of his +sinses in a hurry, becase yer honer don't come down." + +"Is he though? Well now, Larry; tell me this; which of all the +gentlemen in the house has got the largest foot?" + +"Is it the largest foot, yer honer?" said Larry, altogether surprised +by my question. + +"Yes; the largest foot," and then I proceeded to explain to him my +misfortune. He took up first my top-boot, and then the shooting- +boot--in looking at which he gazed with wonder at the nails;--and +then he glanced at my feet, measuring them with his eye; and after +this he pronounced his opinion. + +"Yer honer couldn't wear a morsel of leather belonging to ere a one +of 'em, young or ould. There niver was a foot like that yet among +the O'Conors." + +"But are there no strangers staying here?" + +"There's three or four on 'em come in to dinner; but they'll be +wanting their own boots I'm thinking. And there's young Misther +Dillon; he's come to stay. But Lord love you--" and he again looked +at the enormous extent which lay between the heel and the toe of the +shooting apparatus which he still held in his hand. "I niver see +such a foot as that in the whole barony," he said, "barring my own." + +Now Larry was a large man, much larger altogether than myself, and as +he said this I looked down involuntarily at his feet; or rather at +his foot, for as he stood I could only see one. And then a sudden +hope filled my heart. On that foot there glittered a shoe--not +indeed such as were my own which were now resting ingloriously at +Ballyglass while they were so sorely needed at Castle Conor; but one +which I could wear before ladies, without shame--and in my present +frame of mind with infinite contentment. + +"Let me look at that one of your own," said I to the man, as though +it were merely a subject for experimental inquiry. Larry, accustomed +to obedience, took off the shoe and handed it to me. + +My own foot was immediately in it, and I found that it fitted me like +a glove. + +"And now the other," said I--not smiling, for a smile would have put +him on his guard; but somewhat sternly, so that that habit of +obedience should not desert him at this perilous moment. And then I +stretched out my hand. + +"But yer honer can't keep 'em, you know," said he. "I haven't the +ghost of another shoe to my feet." But I only looked more sternly +than before, and still held out my hand. Custom prevailed. Larry +stooped down slowly, looking at me the while, and pulling off the +other slipper handed it to me with much hesitation. Alas! as I put +it to my foot I found that it was old, and worn, and irredeemably +down at heel;--that it was in fact no counterpart at all to that +other one which was to do duty as its fellow. But nevertheless I put +my foot into it, and felt that a descent to the drawing-room was now +possible. + +"But yer honer will give 'em back to a poor man?" said Larry almost +crying. "The masther's mad this minute becase the dinner's not up. +Glory to God, only listhen to that!" And as he spoke a tremendous +peal rang out from some bell down stairs that had evidently been +shaken by an angry hand. + +"Larry," said I--and I endeavoured to assume a look of very grave +importance as I spoke--"I look to you to assist me in this matter." + +"Och--wirra sthrue then, and will you let me go? just listhen to +that," and another angry peal rang out, loud and repeated. + +"If you do as I ask you," I continued, "you shall be well rewarded. +Look here; look at these boots," and I held up the shooting-shoes new +from Burlington Arcade. "They cost thirty shillings--thirty +shillings! and I will give them to you for the loan of this pair of +slippers." + +"They'd be no use at all to me, yer honer; not the laist use in +life." + +"You could do with them very well for to-night, and then you could +sell them. And here are ten shillings besides," and I held out half +a sovereign which the poor fellow took into his hand. + +I waited no further parley but immediately walked out of the room. +With one foot I was sufficiently pleased. As regarded that I felt +that I had overcome my difficulty. But the other was not so +satisfactory. Whenever I attempted to lift it from the ground the +horrid slipper would fall off, or only just hang by the toe. As for +dancing, that would be out of the question. + +"Och, murther, murther," sang out Larry, as he heard me going down +stairs. "What will I do at all? Tare and 'ounds; there, he's at it +agin, as mad as blazes." This last exclamation had reference to +another peal which was evidently the work of the master's hand. + +I confess I was not quite comfortable as I walked down stairs. In +the first place I was nearly half an hour late, and I knew from the +vigour of the peals that had sounded that my slowness had already +been made the subject of strong remarks. And then my left shoe went +flop, flop, on every alternate step of the stairs. By no exertion of +my foot in the drawing up of my toe could I induce it to remain +permanently fixed upon my foot. But over and above and worse than +all this was the conviction strong upon my mind that I should become +a subject of merriment to the girls as soon as I entered the room. +They would understand the cause of my distress, and probably at this +moment were expecting to hear me clatter through the stone hall with +those odious metal boots. + +However, I hurried down and entered the drawing-room, determined to +keep my position near the door, so that I might have as little as +possible to do on entering and as little as possible in going out. +But I had other difficulties in store for me. I had not as yet been +introduced to Mrs. O'Conor; nor to Miss O'Conor, the squire's +unmarried sister. + +"Upon my word I thought you were never coming," said Mr. O'Conor as +soon as he saw me. "It is just one hour since we entered the house. +Jack, I wish you would find out what has come to that fellow Larry," +and again he rang the bell. He was too angry, or it might be too +impatient to go through the ceremony of introducing me to anybody. + +I saw that the two girls looked at me very sharply, but I stood at +the back of an arm-chair so that no one could see my feet. But that +little imp Tizzy walked round deliberately, looked at my heels, and +then walked back again. It was clear that she was in the secret. + +There were eight or ten people in the room, but I was too much +fluttered to notice well who they were. + +"Mamma," said Miss O'Conor, "let me introduce Mr. Green to you." + +It luckily happened that Mrs. O'Conor was on the same side of the +fire as myself, and I was able to take the hand which she offered me +without coming round into the middle of the circle. Mrs. O'Conor was +a little woman, apparently not of much importance in the world, but, +if one might judge from first appearance, very good-natured. + +"And my aunt Die, Mr. Green," said Kate, pointing to a very straight- +backed, grim-looking lady, who occupied a corner of a sofa, on the +opposite side of the hearth. I knew that politeness required that I +should walk across the room and make acquaintance with her. But +under the existing circumstances how was I to obey the dictates of +politeness? I was determined therefore to stand my ground, and +merely bowed across the room at Miss O'Conor. In so doing I made an +enemy who never deserted me during the whole of my intercourse with +the family. But for her, who knows who might have been sitting +opposite to me as I now write? + +"Upon my word, Mr. Green, the ladies will expect much from an Adonis +who takes so long over his toilet," said Tom O'Conor in that cruel +tone of banter which he knew so well how to use. + +"You forget, father, that men in London can't jump in and out of +their clothes as quick as we wild Irishmen," said Jack. + +"Mr. Green knows that we expect a great deal from him this evening. +I hope you polk well, Mr. Green," said Kate. + +I muttered something about never dancing, but I knew that that which +I said was inaudible. + +"I don't think Mr. Green will dance," said Tizzy; "at least not +much." The impudence of that child was, I think, unparalleled by any +that I have ever witnessed. + +"But in the name of all that's holy, why don't we have dinner?" And +Mr. O'Conor thundered at the door. "Larry, Larry, Larry!" he +screamed. + +"Yes, yer honer, it'll be all right in two seconds," answered Larry, +from some bottomless abyss. "Tare an' ages; what'll I do at all," I +heard him continuing, as he made his way into the hall. Oh what a +clatter he made upon the pavement,--for it was all stone! And how +the drops of perspiration stood upon my brow as I listened to him! + +And then there was a pause, for the man had gone into the dining- +room. I could see now that Mr. O'Conor was becoming very angry, and +Jack the eldest son--oh, how often he and I have laughed over all +this since--left the drawing-room for the second time. Immediately +afterwards Larry's footsteps were again heard, hurrying across the +hall, and then there was a great slither, and an exclamation, and the +noise of a fall--and I could plainly hear poor Larry's head strike +against the stone floor. + +"Ochone, ochone!" he cried at the top of his voice--"I'm murthered +with 'em now intirely; and d-- 'em for boots--St. Peter be good to +me." + +There was a general rush into the hall, and I was carried with the +stream. The poor fellow who had broken his head would be sure to +tell how I had robbed him of his shoes. The coachman was already +helping him up, and Peter good-naturedly lent a hand. + +"What on earth is the matter?" said Mr. O'Conor. + +"He must be tipsy," whispered Miss O'Conor, the maiden sister. + +"I aint tipsy at all thin," said Larry, getting up and rubbing the +back of his head, and sundry other parts of his body. "Tipsy +indeed!" And then he added when he was quite upright, "The dinner is +sarved--at last." + +And he bore it all without telling! "I'll give that fellow a guinea +to-morrow morning," said I to myself--"if it's the last that I have +in the world." + +I shall never forget the countenance of the Miss O'Conors as Larry +scrambled up cursing the unfortunate boots--"What on earth has he got +on?" said Mr. O'Conor. + +"Sorrow take 'em for shoes," ejaculated Larry. But his spirit was +good and he said not a word to betray me. + +We all then went in to dinner how we best could. It was useless for +us to go back into the drawing-room, that each might seek his own +partner. Mr. O'Conor "the masther," not caring much for the girls +who were around him, and being already half beside himself with the +confusion and delay, led the way by himself. I as a stranger should +have given my arm to Mrs. O'Conor; but as it was I took her eldest +daughter instead, and contrived to shuffle along into the dining-room +without exciting much attention, and when there I found myself +happily placed between Kate and Fanny. + +"I never knew anything so awkward," said Fanny; "I declare I can't +conceive what has come to our old servant Larry. He's generally the +most precise person in the world, and now he is nearly an hour late-- +and then he tumbles down in the hall." + +"I am afraid I am responsible for the delay," said I. + +"But not for the tumble I suppose," said Kate from the other side. I +felt that I blushed up to the eyes, but I did not dare to enter into +explanations. + +"Tom," said Tizzy, addressing her father across the table, "I hope +you had a good run to-day." It did seem odd to me that young lady +should call her father Tom, but such was the fact. + +"Well; pretty well," said Mr. O'Conor. + +"And I hope you were up with the hounds." + +"You may ask Mr. Green that. He at any rate was with them, and +therefore he can tell you." + +"Oh, he wasn't before you, I know. No Englishman could get before +you;--I am quite sure of that." + +"Don't you be impertinent, miss," said Kate. "You can easily see, +Mr. Green, that papa spoils my sister Eliza." + +"Do you hunt in top-boots, Mr. Green?" said Tizzy. + +To this I made no answer. She would have drawn me into a +conversation about my feet in half a minute, and the slightest +allusion to the subject threw me into a fit of perspiration. + +"Are you fond of hunting, Miss O'Conor?" asked I, blindly hurrying +into any other subject of conversation. + +Miss O'Conor owned that she was fond of hunting--just a little; only +papa would not allow it. When the hounds met anywhere within reach +of Castle Conor, she and Kate would ride out to look at them; and if +papa was not there that day,--an omission of rare occurrence,--they +would ride a few fields with the hounds. + +"But he lets Tizzy keep with them the whole day," said she, +whispering. + +"And has Tizzy a pony of her own?" + +"Oh yes, Tizzy has everything. She's papa's pet, you know." + +"And whose pet are you?" I asked. + +"Oh--I am nobody's pet, unless sometimes Jack makes a pet of me when +he's in a good humour. Do you make pets of your sisters, Mr. Green?" + +"I have none. But if I had I should not make pets of them." + +"Not of your own sisters?" + +"No. As for myself, I'd sooner make a pet of my friend's sister; a +great deal." + +"How very unnatural," said Miss O'Conor, with the prettiest look of +surprise imaginable. + +"Not at all unnatural I think," said I, looking tenderly and lovingly +into her face. Where does one find girls so pretty, so easy, so +sweet, so talkative as the Irish girls? And then with all their +talking and all their ease who ever hears of their misbehaving? They +certainly love flirting, as they also love dancing. But they flirt +without mischief and without malice. + +I had now quite forgotten my misfortune, and was beginning to think +how well I should like to have Fanny O'Conor for my wife. In this +frame of mind I was bending over towards her as a servant took away a +plate from the other side, when a sepulchral note sounded in my ear. +It was like the memento mori of the old Roman;--as though some one +pointed in the midst of my bliss to the sword hung over my head by a +thread. It was the voice of Larry, whispering in his agony just +above my head - + +"They's disthroying my poor feet intirely, intirely; so they is! I +can't bear it much longer, yer honer." I had committed murder like +Macbeth; and now my Banquo had come to disturb me at my feast. + +"What is it he says to you?" asked Fanny. + +"Oh nothing," I answered, once more in my misery. + +"There seems to be some point of confidence between you and our +Larry," she remarked. + +"Oh no," said I, quite confused; "not at all." + +"You need not be ashamed of it. Half the gentlemen in the county +have their confidences with Larry;--and some of the ladies too, I can +tell you. He was born in this house, and never lived anywhere else; +and I am sure he has a larger circle of acquaintance than any one +else in it." + +I could not recover my self-possession for the next ten minutes. +Whenever Larry was on our side of the table I was afraid he was +coming to me with another agonised whisper. When he was opposite, I +could not but watch him as he hobbled in his misery. It was evident +that the boots were too tight for him, and had they been made +throughout of iron they could not have been less capable of yielding +to the feet. I pitied him from the bottom of my heart. And I pitied +myself also, wishing that I was well in bed upstairs with some +feigned malady, so that Larry might have had his own again. + +And then for a moment I missed him from the room. He had doubtless +gone to relieve his tortured feet in the servants' hall, and as he +did so was cursing my cruelty. But what mattered it? Let him curse. +If he would only stay away and do that, I would appease his wrath +when we were alone together with pecuniary satisfaction. + +But there was no such rest in store for me. "Larry, Larry," shouted +Mr. O'Conor, "where on earth has the fellow gone to?" They were all +cousins at the table except myself, and Mr. O'Conor was not therefore +restrained by any feeling of ceremony. "There is something wrong +with that fellow to-day; what is it, Jack?" + +"Upon my word, sir, I don't know," said Jack. + +"I think he must be tipsy," whispered Miss O'Conor, the maiden +sister, who always sat at her brother's left hand. But a whisper +though it was, it was audible all down the table. + +"No, ma'am; it aint dhrink at all," said the coachman. "It is his +feet as does it." + +"His feet!" shouted Tom O'Conor. + +"Yes; I know it's his feet," said that horrid Tizzy. "He's got on +great thick nailed shoes. It was that that made him tumble down in +the hall." + +I glanced at each side of me, and could see that there was a certain +consciousness expressed in the face of each of my two neighbours;--on +Kate's mouth there was decidedly a smile, or rather, perhaps, the +slightest possible inclination that way; whereas on Fanny's part I +thought I saw something like a rising sorrow at my distress. So at +least I flattered myself. + +"Send him back into the room immediately," said Tom, who looked at me +as though he had some consciousness that I had introduced all this +confusion into his household. What should I do? Would it not be +best for me to make clean breast of it before them all? But alas! I +lacked the courage. + +The coachman went out, and we were left for five minutes without any +servant, and Mr. O'Conor the while became more and more savage. I +attempted to say a word to Fanny, but failed. Vox faucibus haesit. + +"I don't think he has got any others," said Tizzy--"at least none +others left." + +On the whole I am glad I did not marry into the family, as I could +not have endured that girl to stay in my house as a sister-in-law. + +"Where the d-- has that other fellow gone to?" said Tom. "Jack, do +go out and see what is the matter. If anybody is drunk send for me." + +"Oh, there is nobody drunk," said Tizzy. + +Jack went out, and the coachman returned; but what was done and said +I hardly remember. The whole room seemed to swim round and round, +and as far as I can recollect the company sat mute, neither eating +nor drinking. Presently Jack returned. + +"It's all right," said he. I always liked Jack. At the present +moment he just looked towards me and laughed slightly. + +"All right?" said Tom. "But is the fellow coming?" + +"We can do with Richard, I suppose," said Jack. + +"No--I can't do with Richard," said the father. "And will know what +it all means. Where is that fellow Larry?" + +Larry had been standing just outside the door, and now he entered +gently as a mouse. No sound came from his footfall, nor was there in +his face that look of pain which it had worn for the last fifteen +minutes. But he was not the less abashed, frightened and unhappy. + +"What is all this about, Larry?" said his master, turning to him. "I +insist upon knowing." + +"Och thin, Mr. Green, yer honer, I wouldn't be afther telling agin +yer honer; indeed I wouldn't thin, av' the masther would only let me +hould my tongue." And he looked across at me, deprecating my anger. + +"Mr. Green!" said Mr. O'Conor. + +"Yes, yer honer. It's all along of his honer's thick shoes;" and +Larry, stepping backwards towards the door, lifted them up from some +corner, and coming well forward, exposed them with the soles +uppermost to the whole table. + +"And that's not all, yer honer; but they've squoze the very toes of +me into a jelly." + +There was now a loud laugh, in which Jack and Peter and Fanny and +Kate and Tizzy all joined; as too did Mr. O'Conor--and I also myself +after a while. + +"Whose boots are they?" demanded Miss O'Conor senior, with her +severest tone and grimmest accent. + +"'Deed then and the divil may have them for me, Miss," answered +Larry. "They war Mr. Green's, but the likes of him won't wear them +agin afther the likes of me--barring he wanted them very particular," +added he, remembering his own pumps. + +I began muttering something, feeling that the time had come when I +must tell the tale. But Jack with great good nature, took up the +story and told it so well, that I hardly suffered in the telling. + +"And that's it," said Tom O'Conor, laughing till I thought he would +have fallen from his chair. "So you've got Larry's shoes on--" + +"And very well he fills them," said Jack. + +"And it's his honer that's welcome to 'em," said Larry, grinning from +ear to ear now that he saw that "the masther" was once more in a good +humour. + +"I hope they'll be nice shoes for dancing," said Kate. + +"Only there's one down at the heel I know," said Tizzy. + +"The servant's shoes!" This was an exclamation made by the maiden +lady, and intended apparently only for her brother's ear. But it was +clearly audible by all the party. + +"Better that than no dinner," said Peter. + +"But what are you to do about the dancing?" said Fanny, with an air +of dismay on her face which flattered me with an idea that she did +care whether I danced or no. + +In the mean time Larry, now as happy as an emperor, was tripping +round the room without any shoes to encumber him as he withdrew the +plates from the table. + +"And it's his honer that's welcome to 'em," said he again, as he +pulled off the table-cloth with a flourish. "And why wouldn't he, +and he able to folly the hounds betther nor any Englishman that iver +war in these parts before,--anyways so Mick says!" + +Now Mick was the huntsman, and this little tale of eulogy from Larry +went far towards easing my grief. I had ridden well to the hounds +that day, and I knew it. + +There was nothing more said about the shoes, and I was soon again at +my ease, although Miss O'Conor did say something about the +impropriety of Larry walking about in his stocking feet. The ladies +however soon withdrew,--to my sorrow, for I was getting on swimmingly +with Fanny; and then we gentlemen gathered round the fire and filled +our glasses. + +In about ten minutes a very light tap was heard, the door was opened +to the extent of three inches, and a female voice which I readily +recognised called to Jack. + +Jack went out, and in a second or two put his head back into the room +and called to me--"Green," he said, "just step here moment, there's a +good fellow." I went out, and there I found Fanny standing with her +brother. + +"Here are the girls at their wits' ends," said he, "about your +dancing. So Fanny has put a boy upon one of the horse and proposes +that you should send another line to Mrs. Meehan at Ballyglass. It's +only ten miles, and he'll be back in two hours." + +I need hardly say that I acted in conformity with this advice, I went +into Mr. O'Conor's book room, with Jack and his sister, and there +scribbled a note. I was delightful to feel how intimate I was with +them, and how anxious they were to make me happy. + +"And we won't begin till they come," said Fanny. + +"Oh, Miss O'Conor, pray don't wait," said I. + +"Oh, but we will," she answered. "You have your wine to drink, and +then there's the tea; and then we'll have a song two. I'll spin it +out; see if I don't." And so we went to the front door where the boy +was already on his horse--her own nag as I afterwards found. + +"And Patsey," said she, "ride for your life; and Patsey, whatever you +do, don't come back without Mr. Green's pumps--his dancing-shoes you +know." + +And in about two hours the pumps did arrive; and I don't think I ever +spent a pleasanter evening or got more satisfaction out of a pair of +shoes. They had not been two minutes on my feet before Larry was +carrying a tray of negus across the room in those which I had worn at +dinner. + +"The Dillon girls are going to stay here," said Fanny as I wished her +good night at two o'clock. "And we'll have dancing every evening as +long as you remain." + +"But I shall leave to-morrow," said I. + +"Indeed you won't. Papa will take care of that." + +And so he did. "You had better go over to Ballyglass yourself to- +morrow," said he, "and collect your own things. There's no knowing +else what you may have to borrow of Larry." + +I stayed there three weeks, and in the middle of the third I thought +that everything would be arranged between me and Fanny. But the aunt +interfered; and in about a twelvemonth after my adventures she +consented to make a more fortunate man happy for his life. + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's O'Conors of Castle Conor, by Anthony Trollope + diff --git a/old/oconr10.zip b/old/oconr10.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..bee8052 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/oconr10.zip |