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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/18892-8.txt b/18892-8.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d2cb1f8 --- /dev/null +++ b/18892-8.txt @@ -0,0 +1,6069 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Thoughtless Yes, by Helen H. Gardener + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: A Thoughtless Yes + +Author: Helen H. Gardener + +Release Date: March 13, 2013 [EBook #18892] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A THOUGHTLESS YES *** + + + + +Produced by David Widger + + + + + + +A THOUGHTLESS YES + +By Helen H. Gardener + +Author Of + +"Men, Women, and Gods;" "Sex in Brain;" "Pulpit, Pew, and Cradle;" "Is +this Your Son, my Lord?" "Pushed by Unseen Hands," "Pray you, Sir, whose +Daughter?" "An Unofficial Patriot," and "Facts and Fictions of Life." + +Tenth Edition. + +Copyright, 1890, + + + + +Dedication. + +To the many strangers who, after reading such of these stories as have +before been printed, have written me letters that were thoughtful or gay +or sad, I dedicate this volume. + +These letters have come from far and near; from rich and from poor; from +Christian and from unbeliever; from a bishop's palace and from behind +prison walls. + +If this collection of stories shall give to my friends, known and +unknown, as much pleasure and mental stimulus as their letters gave to +me, I shall be content. + +HELEN H. GARDENER. + + +CONTENTS + +A Splendid Judge of a Woman + +The Lady of the Club + +Under Protest + +For the Prosecution + +A Rusty Link in the Chain + +The Boler House Mystery + +The Time-lock of Our Ancestors + +Florence Campbell's Fate + +My Patient's Story + + + + +PREFACE TO THE EIGHTH EDITION. + +In issuing a new edition of this book, it has been thought wise to state +that an unauthorized edition is now on the market, and it is desirable +that the public shall know that all copies of this book not bearing the +imprint of the Commonwealth Company are sold against the will and in +violation of the rights of the author. + +Since some persons have been puzzled to make the connection between +the title of the book and the stories themselves, and to apply Colonel +Ingersoll's exquisite autograph sentiment more clearly, a part of "An +Open Letter," which was written in reply to an editorial review of the +book when it first appeared, is here reprinted, in the hope that it may +remove the difficulty for all. + + + + +AN OPEN LETTER. + +I have, this morning, read your review of "A Thoughtless Yes." I wish +to thank you for the pleasant things said and also to make the +connection--which I am surprised to see did not present itself to your +mind--between the title and the burden of the stories or sketches. + +It is not so easy as you may suppose to get a title which shall be +exactly and fully descriptive of a collection of tales or sketches, +each one of which was written to suggest thoughts and questions on some +particular topic or topics to which people usually pay the tribute of a +thoughtless yes. With one--possibly two--exceptions each sketch means to +suggest to the reader that there may be a very large question mark put +after many of the social, religious, economic, medical, journalistic, or +legal fiats of the present civilization. + +You say that "in 'The Lady of the Club' she [meaning me] does not show +how poverty results from a thoughtless yes. Perhaps she does not see +that it does." I had in my mind exactly that point when I wrote the +story and when I decided upon the title for the book. No, I do not +attempt in such sketches to show _how_, but to show _that_, such and +such conditions exist and that it is wrong. I want to suggest a question +of the justice and the right of several things; but I want to leave each +person free to think out, not my conclusion or remedy, but a conclusion +and a remedy, and at all events to make him refuse, henceforth, the +thoughtless yes of timid acquiescence to things as they are simply +because they are. In the "Lady of the Club" I meant to attack the +impudent authority that makes such a condition of poverty possible, +by calling sympathetic attention to its workings. There are one or two +other ideas sustained by authority, to which, to the readers of that +tale, I wished to make a thoughtless yes henceforth impossible. At least +I hoped to arouse a question. One is taxation of church property. I +wished to point out that by shirking their honest debts churches heap +still farther poverty and burden upon the poor. I hoped, too, to +suggest that the idea of "charity," to which most people give a warmly +thoughtless yes, must be an indignity or impossibility where, even they +would say, it was most needed. I wanted to call attention to the fact +that a physician and a man of tender heart and lofty soul were compelled +to make themselves criminals, before the law, to even be kind to the +dead. That conditions are so savage under the present system that such a +case is absolutely hopeless while the victims live and outrageous after +they are dead. To all of these dictates of impudent authority, to which +most story readers pay the tribute of a thoughtless yes, I wanted to +call attention in such a way that henceforth a question must arise in +their minds. I hoped to show, too, that even so lofty a character +as Roland Barker was tied hand and foot--until it made him almost a +madman--by a system of economics and religion and law which so interlace +as to sustain each other and combine to not only crush the poor but to +prevent the rich from helping along even where they desire to do so. + +These were the main points upon which that particular tale was intended +to arouse a mental attitude of thoughtful protest There are other, minor +ones, which I need not trouble you to recall. If you will notice, nearly +all of the tales end (or stop without an end) with an open question for +the reader to settle--to settle his way, not mine. Indeed, I am not yet +convinced that my own ideas of the changes needed and the way to bring +them about are infallible. I am still open to conviction. I have tried +to grasp the Socialist, Communist, Anarchist, Single-tax, Free-land, and +other ideas and to comprehend just what each could be fairly expected +to accomplish if established--to see the _pros_ and _cons_ of these +and other schemes for social improvement. These, and the varying cults +ranged between, each seems to me to have certain strong points and +certain weak ones. Each seems to me to overlook some essential feature; +and yet I have no system to offer that I think would be better or would +work better than some of these. Indeed, I do most earnestly believe that +_the_ inspired way is yet to be struck out, and I do not believe that +I am the one to do it Meanwhile I can do some things. I can suggest +questions, and, sometimes, answers. But I am not a god, and I do not +want all people to answer my way. I do want to help prevent, now and +henceforth, the tribute of a thoughtless yes from being given to a good +many established wrongs. + +Since such able thinkers as you are have--in the main--already refused +such tribute, I am perfectly satisfied to let each of these answer the +questions I have suggested or may suggest in my fiction in the way that +seems most hopeful to him. + +Meantime, the vast majority of story readers have not yet had their +emotions touched by the dramatic presentation of "the other side." +Fiction has--in the main--worked to make them accept without question +all things as authority has presented them. Who knows but that a lofty +discontent may be stirred in some soul who can solve the awful problems +and at the same time reconcile the various cults of warring philosophers +so that they may combine for humanity and cease to divide for +revenue--or personal pique? I do not believe that the province of a +story is to assume to give the solution of philosophical questions that +have puzzled and proved too much for the best and ablest brains. I have +no doubt that fiction may stir and arouse to thought many who cannot +understand and will not heed essays or argument or preaching, while +it may also present the same thoughts in a new light to those who do. +Personally I do not believe in tacking on to fiction a "moral" or an +"in conclusion" which shall switch all such aroused thoughts into one +channel. Clear thinking and right feeling may lead some one, who is new +to such protest, to solutions that I have not reached. So let us each +question "impudent authority," whether it be in its stupid blindness to +heredity or to environment; and I shall be content that you solve the +new order by an appeal to Anarchism _via_ free land; or that Matilda +Joslyn Gage solve it by the ballot for women and hereditary freedom from +slavish instincts stamped upon a race bom of superstitious and subject +mothers. + +Personally I do not believe that all the free land, free money or +freedom in the world, which shall leave the mothers of the race (whether +in or out of marriage) a subject class or in a position to transmit to +their children the vices or weaknesses of a dominated dependent, will +ever succeed in populating the world with self-reliant, self-respecting, +honorable and capable people. + +On the other hand, I do not see how the ballot in the hands of woman +will do for her all that many believe it will. That it is her right +and would go far is clear; but after that, your question of economics +touches her in a way that it does not and cannot touch men, and I am +free to confess that as yet I have heard of no economic or social plan +that would not of necessity, in my opinion, bear heaviest upon those who +are mothers. So you will see that when I suggested the desirability in +"For the Prosecution" of having mothers on the bench and as jurors where +a case touched points no man living does or can understand in all its +phases, I do not think that would right all the wrong nor solve all the +questions suggested by such a trial; but I thought it would help push +the car of right and justice in the direction of light which we all hope +is ahead. + +You believe more in environment than in heredity; I believe in both, and +that both are sadly and awfully awry, largely because too many people +in too many ways pay to impudent authority the tribute of a thoughtless +yes. + +It is one of the saddest things in this world to see the brave and +earnest men who fight so nobly for better and fairer economic conditions +for "Labor," pay, much too often, the tribute of a thoughtless yes to +the absolute pauper status of all womanhood They resent with spirit +the idea that men should labor for a mere subsistence and always be +dependent upon and at the financial mercy of the rich. They do not +appear to see that to one-half of the race even that much economic +independence would be a tremendous improvement upon her present status. +How would Singletax or Free-land help this? You may reply that Anarchism +would solve that problem. Would it? With maternity and physical +disabilities in the scale? To my mind, all the various economic schemes +yet put forward lack an essential feature. They provide for a free +and better manhood, but they pay the tribute of a thoughtless yes to +impudent authority in the case of womanhood, in many things. And so long +as motherhood is serfhood, just so long will this world be populated +with a race easy to subjugate, weak to resist oppression, criminal +in its instincts of cruelty toward those in its power, and humble and +subservient toward authority and domination. Character rises but little +above its source. The mother molds the man. If she have the status, the +instincts, and the spirit of a subordinate, she will transmit these, +and the more enlightened she is the surer is this, because of her +consciousness of her own degradation. + +Look at the Kemmler horror. People all marvel at his "brutish nature +and his desire to kill." No one says anything about the fact, which was +merely mentioned at his trial, that his "father was a butcher and his +mother helped in the business." Did you know that this is also true of +Jesse Pomeroy; the boy who "from infancy tortured animals and killed +whatever he could?" + +Would all this sort of thing mean absolutely nothing to women of the +same social and scientific status enjoyed by the men who assisted at the +trials of these two and at the legal murder of one? In ordinary women, +of course, it would not stir very deep thought But these were not +ordinary men. They were far more than that, Almost all the women who +have spoken or written to me of the Kemmler horror have touched that +thought Have you heard a man discuss it? Is there a reason for this? Do +we pay the tribute of a thoughtless yes to all that clusters about the +present ideas on such subjects and about their criminal medicolegal +aspects? But this letter grows too long. + +With great respect and hearty good wishes, + +I am sincerely, + +Helen H. Gardener. + + + + +A SPLENDID JUDGE OF A WOMAN. + +_"We look at the one little woman's face we lovey as we look at the +face of our mother earth, and see all sorts of answers to our own +yearnings."_--George Eliot. + + +"But after all it is not fair to blame her as you do, Cuthbert. She is +what she must be. It is not at all strange. Midge--" + +"I am quite out of patience with you, Nora;" exclaimed Cuthbert Wagner, +vehemently. "How can you excuse her? Midge, as you call her, has been no +friend to you. She was deceitful and designing all along. She even tried +in every way she could think of to undermine you in _my_ affections!" He +tossed his head contemptuously and strode to the window where he stood +glaring out into the moonlight in fierce and indignant protest. His wife +had so often spoken well of Margaret Mintem. She did not appear to hold +the least resentment toward the school-friend of her past years, while +Cuthbert could see nothing whatever that was good or deserving of +praise in the character of the young lady in question. He was bitterly +resentful because Margaret Mintem had spoken ill of his wife while she +was only his betrothed, and Cuthbert Wagner did not forgive easily. + +Nora crossed the room with her swift, graceful tread, and the sweep of +her lace gown over the thick rug had not reached her husband's ear as he +stood thumping on the window pane. He started a little, therefore, when +a soft hand was laid upon his arm and a softer face pressed itself close +to his shoulder. + +"It is very sweet of you, dear," she said in her low, gentle voice, +"It is very sweet of you to feel so keenly any thrust made at me; but +darling, you are unfair to Midge, poor girl! My heart used often to +bleed for her. It must be terribly hard for her to fight her own nature, +as she does,--as she _must_,--and lose the battle so often after all." + +"Fight fiddle-sticks!" said Cuthbert, and then went on grumbling in +inarticulate sounds, at which his wife laughed out merrily. + +"Oh, boo, boo, boo," she said, pretending to imitate his unuttered +words. + +"I don't believe a word of it. _I know Margaret Mintern_. Did I not +room with her for three long years? And do I not know that she is a good +girl, and a very noble one, too, in spite of her little weakness of envy +or jealousy? + +"She can't help that. I am sure she must be terribly humiliated by it. +Indeed, indeed, dear, I know that she is; but she cannot master it. It +is a part of her. I do not know whether she was bom with it or not; but +I do know that all of her life since she was a very little girl she has +been so situated that just that particular defect in her character is +the inevitable result. Don't you believe, Cuthbert, that all such things +are natural productions? Why, dearie, it seems to me that you might as +reasonably feel angry with me because my hair is brown as toward Midge +because her envy sometimes overbears her better qualities. The real +fault lies--" + +"O Nora, suppose you take the stump! Lecture on 'Whatever is is right,' +and have done with it." + +"Aha, my dear," laughed his wife, "I have caught you napping again. I do +not say that it is right; but I do say that it is natural for Margaret +to be just what she is. That is just the point people always overlook, +it seems to me. Nature is wrong about half of the time--even inanimate +nature. Just look over there! See those splendid mountains and the +lovely little valley all touched with moonlight; but, oh, how the +eye longs for water! A lake, a splendid river, the ocean in the +distance--something that is water--_anything_ that is water! But no, it +is valley and mountain and mountain and valley, until the most beautiful +spot in the world, when first you see it, grows hateful and tiresome and +lacking in the most important feature." + +Cuthbert laughed. "A lake would look well just over there by McGuire's +barn, now, wouldn't it? And, come to think of it, how a few mountains +would improve things over at Newport or Long Beach." He stopped to thump +a bug from his wife's shoulder. + +"How pretty you look in that black lace, little woman. I don't believe +nature needed any improver once in her life anyhow--when she made you." + +Nora smiled. A pleased, gratified little dimple made itself visible at +one corner of her mouth. Her husband stooped over and kissed it lightly, +just as the portiere was drawn aside and a guest announced by James, the +immaculate butler. + +"We've just been having a quarrel, Bailey," said Mr. Wagner, as he +advanced to greet the visitor, "and now I mean to leave it to you if--" + +"Yes," drawled Mr. Bailey, "I noticed that as I came in. You were just +punctuating your quarrel as James drew back the portiere. That is the +reason I coughed so violently as I stepped inside. Don't be alarmed +about my health. It isn't consumption. It is only assumption, I do +assure you. I assumed that you assumed that you were alone--that there +wasn't an interested spectator; but, great Scott! Bert, I don't blame +you, so don't apologize;" and with a low bow of admiration to his +friend's wife, he joined in the laugh. + +"But what was the row? I'm consumed to hear it," he added, as they were +seated. "I should be charmed to umpire the matter--so long as it ended +that way. Now, go on; but I want to give you fair warning, old man, that +I am on Mrs. Wagner's side to start with, so you fire off your biggest +guns and don't attempt to roll any twisted balls." + +"_Curved_ balls," laughed Nora, "not twisted; and it seems to me you +mixed your games just a wee bit. There isn't any game with guns and +balls both, is there?" + +"Oh, yes, yes indeed," replied Mr. Bailey, promptly. "The old, old game +in which there is brought to bear a battery of eyes." + +"Oh, don't," said Cuthbert. "I am not equal to it! But after all, I +can't see that you are well out of this, Ned. Where do the balls come +in?" + +"What have you against eyeballs that roll in a fine frenzy when a +battery of handsome eyes is trained upon a bashful fellow like me?" he +asked quite gravely, and then all three laughed and Cuthbert pretended +to faint. + +"I shall really have to protest, myself, if you go any farther, Mr. +Bailey," said Nora. + +"You are getting into deep water, and if you are to be on my side in the +coming contest, I want you to have a cool head and--" + +"A clean heart;" put in Cuthbert. + +"Mrs. Wagner never asks for impossibilities, I am sure," said Mr. +Bailey, dryly. + +"But she does. That is just it. She wants to make me believe that a girl +who traduced her and acted like a little fiend generally, is an adorable +creature--a natural production which couldn't help itself--had to behave +that way. We--" + +"I believe I started in by saying that I should be on your side, Mrs. +Wagner," said their guest, assuming a judicial attitude and bracing +himself behind an imaginary pile of accumulated evidence, "but I'm +beginning to wobble already. If Bert makes another home run like that, I +warn you, madam, that while I shall endeavor to be a fair and impartial +judge, I shall decide against you." + +Nora's eyes had a twinkle in their depths for an instant, but her face +had grown grave. + +"Wait. Let me tell you." she said. "Even Cuthbert does not know just +how it was--what went to make my old school-friend's character precisely +what it became. It was like this: When she was a very little girl her +father died, and the poor little mother went back home with her four +young children, and her crushed pride, to be an additional burden to +the already overburdened father, who was growing old and who had small +children of his own still to educate and pilot through society. +He had lost his hold on business when he went into the army; and +although he came home a general, quite covered with glory, a large +family cannot live on glory, you know, and fame will not buy party +dresses for three daughters and a grandchild." + +"I've noticed that," remarked Mr. Bailey, dryly. + +"The added importance of his position and the consequent publicity made +the handsome party gowns all the more necessary, however," said Nora, +not heeding the interruption, "and so the family had to do a great many +things that were not pleasant to make even one end meet, as poor Midge +used to say. The General loved brains and his granddaughter was very +bright." + +Cuthbert gave a low whistle. He would not compromise. If he found one +thing wrong in an acquaintance all things were wrong. It followed, +therefore, in his mind, that since Margaret Min-tern had been guilty of +envy, she was altogether unlikely to possess fine mental capabilities. +He would not even allow that she was stylish and sang well. + +His wife took no notice of his outburst, but her color deepened a little +as she went on. + +"She was the most clever girl mentally that I have ever known and she +was a vast deal of service to me in the years we were together. She +sharpened my wits and stimulated my thoughts in a thousand ways, for +which I am her debtor still. But I am getting ahead of my story. As I +say, the old General worshipped brains, but he also adored beauty; and, +alas, his granddaughter was quite plain--" + +"Ugly as a hedge-fence, and I never could see that she was so +superhumanly brilliant or stylish, as you claim, either," put in +Cuthbert Wagner, as he leaned back in his deep chair with his eyes drawn +to a narrow line. + +"She was almost exactly the same age of her Aunt Julia, the General's +youngest daughter; but Julia was a dream of beauty and of stupidity." + +"Situation is now quite plain," said Mr. Bailey. "The lovely Julie got +there. She always does, and--" + +"Ah, but you must remember that in this case 'there' was the heart of +the father of one and the grandfather of the other," said Nora, smiling. + +Her husband laughed outright and faced Mr. Bailey. + +"I rather think she has got you now, old man. In a case like that +I'm hanged if I know how it would turn out--who would get there. The +elements won't mix. It is not the usual thing. + +"The beautiful stupid and the brilliant but plain are all +right,--regular stage properties, so to speak,--but the grandfather! +I'll wager if we tossed up for it, and you got heads and I got tails +we'd both be wrong. + +"There is something actually uncanny in the aged grandparent ingredient +in a conundrum like that. Now if it were a young fellow,--only the +average donkey,--why of course the lovely Julia would bear off the +palm and leave Midge, as Nora calls her, to pine away. But if it were a +level-headed, middle-aged chap like me, brains would take precedence." +He waved his hand lightly toward his wife, who parted her lips over a +set of little white teeth and a radiant smile burst forth. + +"You are a bold hypocrite, Bert," said Mr. Bailey. "You did not have to +make any such choice, and you are not entitled to the least credit in +the premises. You got both." + +"This is really quite overwhelming," laughed Nora; "but--" + +"Why on earth did you call her attention to it, Ned," exclaimed Mr. +Wagner, with great pretence of annoyance. "She would have swallowed it +whole. I wonder why it is a woman so loves to be told that you married +her for her intellect, when in nine hundred and ninety-nine cases out +of eight hundred and forty you did nothing of the kind, and she knows +it perfectly well. You married her because you loved her, brains or no +brains, beauty or no beauty, and that's an end of it. Isn't that so, +Ned?" + +"Well, I'm not prepared to say, yet. I am umpire. I have not made up my +mind which I shall marry--the lovely Julia, or the brilliant niece; but +I think I shall in the long run." + +"God help you if you do!" said Cuthbert, dramatically. "I don't know +Julia, the beautiful; but I'd hate to see you married to a cat with +uncut claws, Ned, much as I think you need dressing down from time to +time." + +"Mrs. Wagner," said Mr. Bailey, turning to her, gravely, "I'm not paying +the least attention to him, and I am eager to hear how the grandfather +got out of it." + +"The _grandfather!_" exclaimed Nora, "why I had no idea of telling his +story. It was the two girls I was interested in--or at least, in one of +them; but that is just like a man. He--" + +She allowed her feather fan to fall in her lap and looked up helplessly. +"But come to think of the other side, his story _would_ be worth +telling, wouldn't it? It must have been a rather trying situation for +him, too." + +She took the fan up again, and waved it before her, thoughtfully. "I +wonder why I never thought of that before. I have always rather blamed +him for developing his granddaughter's one sad defect. I thought he +should have guarded her against it. And--I do wonder if it is because I +am a woman that I never before thought how very difficult it must have +been for him?" + +"No doubt, no doubt," said her husband, dryly. "But now that we have +shed a few tears over our mental shortcomings and lack of breadth of +sympathy in overlooking the sad predicament of the doughty General, +proceed. The umpire sleepeth apace, and I've got to have my shy at the +charming Midge before we've done with her," and he shut his paper-knife +with a wicked little click. + +"You can see how it would be," Nora began again, quite gravely, and the +gentlemen both smiled. "You can see how it would be. The granddaughter +was made to feel that she was in the way--was a burden. Her mother +would urge her to become indispensable to the old General. To read to +him, talk brightly to him, sing and play for him, watch his moods and +meet them cleverly. It was all done as a race for his affections. Julia +raced with her, setting her beauty and the other great fact that she was +the child of his old age over against the entertaining qualities of her +rival." + +Mr. Bailey drew his handkerchief across his brow and looked helplessly +perplexed, while Cuthbert responded with a dreary shake of the head. + +"It is a clear case of 'The Lady or the Tiger,' yet, so far as I can +see," said he. "Who got there, Bailey?" + +Mr. Bailey smiled despairingly, and shook his head, but said nothing. + +"It went on like that day after day, week after week, month after month, +year after year," continued Nora, looking steadily in front of her and +shivering a little, "until they were both young ladies. The General +gave a party to present them both to society at the same time. His +granddaughter tried to make him feel that he was repaid for the +expense and trouble by the display of her exceptional powers as a +conversationalist--Julia, by the display of her neck and shoulders, her +exquisite rose-leaf face, and her childishly pretty manners. This sort +of rivalry would have been well enough, no doubt, if it had not been +for the fact that from childhood up to this culmination there had been +a dash of bitterness in it, an un-der-current of antagonism; and poor +Midge had always been the main sufferer, because she was very sensitive +and she was made to feel that all she received was taken from her aunt +Julia. To stand first with her father, Julia would do almost anything; +and the ingenuity with which she devised cruel little stabs at Midge was +simply phenomenal. To be absolutely necessary to him became almost a +mania with his granddaughter." + +"If this thing goes on much longer, I am going to have a fit," Cuthbert +announced, placidly. + +"The girl you judge so harshly, poor child, had a great many of them," +said Nora, with an inflection in her voice that checked a laugh on Mr. +Bailey's lips. "Fits of depression, fits of anger, fits of sorrow, fits +of shame and of indignation with herself and with others. For there were +times when she stooped to little meannesses which her sensitive soul +abhorred. If intense effort resulted, after all, in failure, envy of +her successful rival grew up in her heart; and, sometimes, if it were +carefully cultivated by the pruning hook of sarcasm or an unkind look of +triumph, she would say or do a mean or underhand thing, and then regret +it passionately when it was too late." + +Cuthbert gave a grunt of utter incredulity. + +"Regretted it so little she'd do it again next day," he grumbled. Nora +went steadily on. + +"It grew to be the one spring and impulse of her whole nature--the +necessity of her existence--to stand _first_ with the ruling spirit +wherever she was, whoever it might be. At school I have known her to +sit up all night to make sure that she would be letter-perfect in her +lessons the following morning. Not because she cared for her studies so +much as because she _must_ feel that she stood first in the estimation +of her teachers. And then, too, her grandfather would know and be proud +of her. It got to be nature with her (I do not know how much of the +tendency may have been born in her) to need to stand on the top wherever +she was. (It has always seemed to me that the conditions surrounding her +were quite enough to explain this characteristic without an appeal to a +possible heredity of which I can know nothing.) Even where we boarded, +although she disliked the women and looked down upon the young men, she +made them all like her, and even went the length of allowing one young +fellow to ask her to marry him simply because she saw that he was +interested in me." + +"Humph! She--" began Cuthbert, but his wife held up her hand to check +him, and did not pause in her story. + +"Up to that time she had not given him a thought, and she was very angry +when he finally asked the great question. She thought that he should +have known that such a girl as she was could not be for a man of his +limitations. She felt insulted. She flew up stairs and cried with +indignation. 'The mere idea!' she said to me. 'How dared he! The common +little biped!' I told her that she had encouraged him, and had brought +unnecessary pain upon him as well as regret upon herself. Then she was +angry with me. By and by she put her hand out in the darkness and +took mine and pressed it. Then she said, 'Nora, it _was_ my +fault; but--but--' and then she began to sob again. 'But, Nora, I +don't--know--why--I--did--it--and,' there was a long pause. 'And, +beside, I _thought_ he was in love with you,'" she sobbed out. + +"That was the whole story," said Cuthbert, resentfully. "She simply +wanted to supplant you and--" + +"Yes, that _was_ the whole story, as you say, dear," said his wife, +gently; "but the poor girl could not help it. And--and she did not +understand it herself at all." + +"You make me provoked, Nora," said Cuthbert, almost sharply. "She wasn't +a fool. She tried the same game on me a year or two later; but that +time it didn't work. She even went the length of talking ill of you to +me--saying little cutting things--when she found I had utterly succumbed +to your attractions. I have to laugh yet when I think of it,--that is, +when it don't make me too angry to laugh,--how I gave her a good round +talking to." He laughed now at the recollection. + +"She must have taken me for her delightful old grandparent the way I +lectured her. But when I remembered how loyal you were to her, it just +made my blood boil and I told her so." + +Mr. Bailey shifted his position and began to contemplate giving a +verdict emphatically against the absent lady, when Nora checked him by a +wave of her fan. + +"Yes, I know she did, Cuthbert, and I know everything you said to her. +You were very cruel--if you had understood, as you did not and do not +yet. She came and told me all about it." Cuthbert Wagner gave a low, +incredulous whistle, and even Mr. Bailey looked sceptical. + +"She came back from that drive with you the most wretched girl you ever +saw. Her humiliation was pitiful to see. Her self-reproach was touching +and real. I believe she would have killed herself if I had seemed to +blame her." + +Cuthbert snapped out: + +"Humph! Very likely; and gone and done the same thing again the next +day." + +"Possibly that is true--if there had been a next day with a new +temptation that was too strong for her on the shore where she landed +after death If--" + +"If the Almighty had shown a preference for some one else, hey?" asked +Mr. Bailey, flippantly. + +"No doubt, no doubt," acquiesced Nora. "But suppose you had a weak leg +and it gave way at a critical moment--say just when you were entering +an opera box to greet a lady. Suppose it dropped you in a ridiculous or +humiliating manner. You would rage and be distressed, and make up your +mind not to let it occur again, except in the seclusion of your own +apartments; but--well, it would be quite as likely to serve you the same +trick the following week, in church." + +"The illustration does not strike me as quite fair," said Mr. Bailey, +judicially. + +"Good, Ned! Don't let her argue you into an interest in that little cat. +She was simply a malicious little--" + +"Wait, then," said Nora, ignoring her husband's outburst and looking +steadily at Margaret Mintem's new judge, who was showing signs of +passing a sentence no less severe than if it were delivered by Cuthbert +Wagner himself. + +"Suppose we take your memory. Are there not some names or dates that +_will_ drop out at times and leave you awkwardly in the lurch?" + +"Well, rather," said Mr. Bailey, disgustedly. This was his weak spot. + +"Now, don't you see that a person who has a perfect memory might be as +unfair to you as you are to my old school friend in her little moral +weakness--if we may call it by so harsh a term as that? That was her one +vulnerable spot. It may have been born in her. That I do not know; but +I insist that it _was_ trained and drilled into her as much as her +arithmetic or her catechism were, and with a result as inevitable. She +loathed her fault, but it was too strong for her. Her resolution to +conquer it dropped just short of success very often, indeed; and oh! how +it did hurt her when she realized it and thought it all over, for her +motives were unusually pure, and her moral sense was really very high +indeed." + +"Moral sense was a little frayed at the edges, I think." + +"Don't, Cuthbert. You are such a cruelly severe judge. I know Mr. Bailey +is on my side, now, and will think you very unfair. He does not mean +to be, I assure you, Mr. Bailey, and if she had not spoken ill of me he +would see the case fairly. But what _are_ you thinking?" + +"That it is a rather big question. That I--that I have overstayed my +time. I just came over to ask you to dine with us next Thursday. My +mother has some friends and wants you to meet them. May I leave my +judicial decision open until then?" + +"Certainly. Pray over it," said Cuthbert, rising; "and if you don't come +out on my side, openly,--as I know you are in your mind,--buy a wire +mask. I won't have any dodging." + +"Come early. There is a secret to tell," laughed Mr. Bailey as he +withdrew, and then he blushed furiously. "Mother's secret," he added, as +he closed the door behind him. + +The evening of the dinner the Wagners were later than they had intended +to be, and Mrs. Bailey took Nora aside and said quite abruptly: + +"I've got to pop it at you rather suddenly. Why didn't you come earlier? +The lady whom Ned is to marry is here, and it is for her I have given +the dinner. Ned went to your house to tell you last week, but his heart +failed him. He said you were all in such a gale of nonsense that he +concluded to wait. It is a very tender subject with him, I assure you. +His case is quite hopeless. He is madly in love, and I am very much +pleased with his choice. She seems as nearly perfect as they ever are, +and she is unusually talented. But here is Ned now. I have told her all +about it, my son, come and be congratulated." + +He came forward shyly enough for a man of his years and experience, and +took Nora's hand in a helpless way. But Cuthbert relieved matters at +once by a hearty "Well, it is splendid, old fellow. I'm delighted. I--" + +"But before the others come down," broke in Mr. Bailey, as if to get +away from the subject, "I want to get my discharge papers in that case +you plead before me last week. It lies heavy on my soul, for I am very +sorry to say, Mrs. Wagner, that I am compelled to give judgment against +you and your client. I think she was--I'm with Cuthbert this time. She +impresses me as almost without redeeming qualities. I do not wish to +make her acquaintance. I am sure that I could never force myself to take +even a passing interest in that sort of a moral acrobat. Really, the +lovely but selfish Julia would be my choice in a team of vicious little +pacers like that. I'm sure I should detect your friend's fatal weakness +in her every action. I should be unable to see anything but the hideous +green-eyed monster even in the folds of her lace gowns or the coils of +her shining hair. He would appear to me, ghost-like, peering over her +shoulder in the midst of her most fascinating conversation. I should +feel his fangs and see the glitter of his wicked eyes while I tried to +say small nothings to her, and--" + +"Oh, not at all," protested Nora. "You would never detect it at all +unless she happened to be fighting for your esteem or admiration where +she felt that odds were against her. She--" + +"I beg your pardon, Mrs. Wagner, but I am quite sure that I should. +Envy is to me the very worst trait in the human character. I could more +easily excuse or be blinded to anything else. I _know_ that I should +detect it at once. I always do--especially in a woman." + +"Certainly. Anybody could. You know very well, Nora, that I saw--" began +Cuthbert quite gleefully; but as a salve to her wounded feelings Mr. +Bailey added in a tone of conciliation to Nora: + +"However, I shall agree to let you test me some day. Present your friend +to me, _incog._, and I'll wager--oh, _anything_ that I shall read her +like a book on sight. I'm a splendid judge of a woman. Always was from +childhood. I'm sure that I should feel creepy the moment I saw the +brilliant but envious granddaughter of the unfortunate old warrior. And +by the way, _he_ continues to be the one for whom you have enlisted my +sympathy. I wonder that he was able to live two weeks in the same house +with such a--" + +"Cat," said Cuthbert, with a vicious jab at a paper-weight which +represented a solemn-looking Chinese god in brocade trousers. He was +just turning to enter into a cheerful and elaborate statement of his +side of the controversy, as Mrs. Bailey swept down the room with her +son's betrothed upon her arm, smiling and happy. + +"Margaret Mintern!" exclaimed Nora, in dismay, and then-- + +"I am so glad to see you again, dear, and to be able to congratulate +you, instead of some fair unknown, upon the fact that you are to have so +dear a friend of ours for a husband. We think everything of Mr. Bailey. +He is Bert's best friend and--" + +Cuthbert had turned half away in utter confusion when he saw the ladies +coming down the room, and feigned an absorption in the rotund Chinese +deity which he had never displayed for the one of his own nation. But he +bowed now, and mumbled some inarticulate sounds as he looked, not at +the future Mrs. Bailey, but at the ridiculously happy face of her lover, +whose usually ready tongue was silent as he hung upon the lightest tone +of the brilliant woman beside him. As they passed into the dining-room, +Nora managed to say to her husband: + +"Thank heaven we did not mention her name to him, and he evidently does +not suspect. Pull yourself together and stumble through your part the +best you can, dear, without attracting his attention. And then you know +that he and you agree perfectly about the--cat," she added wickedly, and +then she smiled quietly as she took her seat next to the blissful lover +and the relentless judge of the school friend of her youth. + + + + +THE LADY OF THE CLUB. + + "Poor naked wretches, wheresoe'er you are, + That bide the pelting of this pitiless storm, + How shall your houseless heads, and unfed sides, + Your loop'd, and window'd raggedness, defend you + From seasons such as these? O, I have ta'en + Too little care of this! Take physic, pomp; + Expose thyself to feel what wretches feel; + That thou may'st shake the super flux to them, + Show the heavens more just." + + Shakespeare. + + + + +I. + +The old and somewhat cynical saying, that philosophers and reformers can +bear the griefs and woes of other people with a heroism and resignation +worthy of their creeds, would have fitted the case of Roland Barker only +when shorn of the intentional sting of sarcasm. It is, nevertheless, +true that even his nobly-gifted nature, his tender heart, and his alert +brain sometimes failed to grasp the very pith and point of his own +arguments. + +He was a wealthy man whose sympathies were earnestly with the poor and +unfortunate. He believed that he understood their sufferings, their +ambitions, and their needs; and his voice and pen were no more truly on +the side of charity and brotherly kindness than was his purse. + +It was no unusual thing for him to attend a meeting, address a club, or +take part in a memorial service, where his was the only hand unused to +toil, and where he alone bore all expense, and then--after dressing +himself in the most approved and faultless manner--become the guest +of honor at some fashionable entertainment. Indeed, he was a leader in +fashion as well as in philosophy, and at once a hero in Avenue A and on +Murray Hill. + +On the evening of which I am about to tell you he had addressed a +club of workingmen in their little dingy hall, taking as his subject +"Realities of Life." He had sought to show them that poverty and toil +are not, after all, the worst that can befall a man, and that the most +acute misery dwells in palaces and is robed in purple. + +He spoke with the feeling of one who had himself suffered--as, indeed, +he had--from the unsympathetic associations of an uncongenial marriage. +He portrayed, with deep feeling, the chill atmosphere of a loveless +home, whose wealth and glitter and lustre could never thrill and +enrapture the heart as might the loving hand-clasp in the bare, chill +rooms where sympathy and affection were the companions of poverty. + +I had admired his enthusiasm as he pictured the joy of sacrifice for the +sake of those we love, and I had been deeply touched by his +pathos--a pathos which I knew, alas, too well, sprang from a hungry +heart--whether, as now, it beat beneath a simple coat of tweed or, as +when hours later, it would still be the prisoner of its mighty longing, +though clothed with elegance and seated at a banquet fit for princes. + +The last words fell slowly from his lips, and his eyes were dimmed, as +were the eyes of all about me. His voice, so full of feeling, had hardly +ceased to throb when, far back in the little hall, arose a woman, +thin and worn, and plainly clad, but showing traces of a beauty and +refinement which had held their own and fought their way inch by inch +in spite of poverty, anxiety, and tears. The chairman recognized her and +asked her to the platform. + +"No," she said, in a low, tremulous tone which showed at once her +feeling and her culture--"no, I do not wish to take the platform; but +since you ask for criticism of the kind speech we have just listened to, +it has seemed to me that I might offer one, although I am a stranger to +you all." + +Her voice trembled, and she held firmly to the back of a chair in front +of her. The chairman signified his willingness to extend to her the +privilege of the floor, and there was slight applause. She bowed and +began again slowly: + +"I sometimes think that it is useless to ever try to make the suffering +rich and the suffering poor understand each other. I do not question +that the gentleman has tasted sorrow. All good men have. I do not +question that his heart is warm and true and honest, and that he truly +thinks what he has said; but"--and here her voice broke a little and her +lip trembled--"but he does not know what real suffering is. He cannot. +No rich man can." There was a movement of impatience in the room, and +some one said, loud enough to be heard, "If she thinks money can bring +happiness she is badly left." + +There was a slight ripple of laughter at this, and even the serious face +of Roland Barker grew almost merry for a moment. Then the woman went on, +without appearing to have noticed the interruption: + +"I do not want to seem ungracious, and heaven knows, no one could mean +more kindly what I say; but he has said that money is not needed to make +us happy--only love; and again he quotes that baseless old maxim, 'The +love of money is the root of all evil.'" She paused, then went slowly on +as if feeling her way and fearing to lose her hold upon herself: "I know +it is a sad and cruel world even to the more fortunate, if they have +hearts to feel and brains to think. To the unloving or unloved there +must be little worth; but they at least are spared the agony that sits +where love and poverty have shaken hands with death"--her voice broke, +and there was a painful silence in the room--"where those who love are +wrung and torn by all the thousand fears and apprehensions of ills that +are to come to wife and child and friend. The day has passed when all +this talk of poverty and love--that love makes want an easy thing to +bear--the day has passed, I say, when sane men ought to think, or wise +men speak, such cruel, false, and harmful words. He truly says that +money without love cannot bring happiness; but that is only half the +truth, for love with poverty can bring, does bring, the keenest agony +that mortals ever bore." + +There was a movement of dissent in the hall. She lifted her face a +moment, contracted her lips, drew a long breath, and said: + +"I will explain. Without the love, poverty were light enough to bear. +What does it matter for one's self? It is the love that gives the awful +sting to want, and makes its cruel fingers grip the throat as never vise +or grappling-hook took hold, and torture with a keener zest than fiends +their victims! Love and Poverty! _It is the combination that devils +invented to make a hell on earth._" + +All eyes were fastened on her white face now, and she was rushing on, +her words, hot and impassioned, striking firm on every point she made. + +"Let me give you a case. In a home where comfort is--or wealth--a mother +sits, watching by night and day the awful hand of Death reach nearer, +closer to her precious babe, and nothing that skill or science can +suggest will stay the hand or heal the aching heart; and yet there is +comfort in the thought that all was done that love and wealth and skill +could do, and that it was Nature's way. But take from her the comfort of +that thought. She watches with the same poor, breaking heart, but +with the knowledge, now, to keep her company, that science might, ah! +_could_, push back the end, could even cure her babe if but the means to +pay for skill and change and wholesome food and air were hers. Is that +no added pang? Is poverty no curse to her?--a curse the deeper for +her depth of love? The rich know naught of this. It gives to life its +wildest agony, to love its deepest hurt." + +She paused. There was a slight stir as if some one had thought to offer +applause, and then the silence fell again, and she began anew, with +shining eyes and cheeks aflame. She swayed a little as she spoke and +clutched the chair as for support. Her voice grew hoarse, and trembled, +and she fixed her gaze upon a vacant chair: + +"But let me tell you of another case. A stone's throw from this hall, +where pretty things are said week after week--and kindly meant, I +know--of poverty and love--of the blessedness of these--there is a +living illustration, worth more than all the theories ever spun, to tell +you what 'realities of life' must be where love is great and poverty +holds sway. Picture, with me, the torture and despair of a refined and +cultured woman who watches hour by hour the long months through, and +sees the creeping feet of mental wreck, and physical decay, and knows +the mortal need of care and calm for him who is the whole of life to +her, and for the want of that which others waste and hold as dross he +must work on and on, hastening each day the end _he_ does not see, which +shall deprive him of all of life except the power for ill.... She will +be worse than widowed and alone, for ever by her side sits Want, for +him, tearing at every chord of heart and soul--not for herself--but for +that dearer one, wrecked in the prime of life and left a clod endowed +only with strength for cruel wrong, whose hand would sheath a knife in +her dear heart and laugh with maniac glee at his mad deeds. She saw the +end. She knew long months ago what was to be, if he must toil and strain +his nerve and brain for need of that which goes from knave to knave, and +hoards itself within cathedral walls, where wise men meet to teach +the poor contentment with their lot! She knew _he_ must not know; the +knowledge of the shadow must be kept from _his_ dear brain until the +very end, by smiles, and cheer, and merry jest from her. Who dare tell +_her_ that riches are a curse? and prate of 'dross' and call on heaven +to witness that its loss is only gain of joy and harbinger of higher, +holier things? Who dare call _her_ as witness for the bliss of poverty +with love?" + +She slowly raised her hand and, with a quick-drawn breath, pressed it +against her side, and with her eyes still fastened on the vacant chair, +and tears upon her cheeks, falling unchecked upon her heaving bosom, she +held each listener silent and intent on every word she spoke. The time +allotted anyone was long since overrun; but no one thought of that, and +she went on: + +"'With love!' Ah, there is where the iron can burn and scar and open +every wound afresh each day, make poverty a curse, a blight, a scourge, +a vulture, iron-beaked, with claws of burning steel, that leave no nerve +untouched, no drop of blood unshed. + +"'With love!' 'Tis there the hand of Poverty can deal the deadliest +blows, and show, as nowhere else on earth, the value of that slandered, +hoarded thing called wealth." + +There blazed into her face a fierce, indignant light, her voice swelled +out and struck upon the ear like fire-bells in the dead of night: + +"'The root of evil!'--'poverty with love!' Hypocrisy, in purple velvet +robed, behind stained glass, with strains of music falling on its ears, +with table spread in banquet-hall below, bethought itself to argue thus +to those itself had robbed; while, thoughtless of its meaning and its +birth, the echo of its lying, treacherous words comes from the pallid +lips of many a wretch whose life has been a failure and an agony because +of that which he himself extols. A lie once born contains a thousand +lives, and holds at bay the struggling, feeble truth, if but that lie be +fathered by a priest and mothered by a throne--_as this one was!_ 'The +root of evil' is the spring of joy. Decry it those who will. And those +who do _not_ love, perchance, may laugh at all its need can mean; but +to the loving, suffering poor bring no more cant, and cease to voice the +hollow words of Ignorance and Hypocrisy. It is too cruel, and its deadly +breath has long enough polluted sympathy and frozen up the springs +of healthy thought, while sheathing venomed fangs in breaking hearts. +Recast your heartless creeds! Your theories for the poor are built on +these." + +She sank back into her chair white and exhausted. + +There was a wild burst of applause. A part of the audience, with that +ear for sound and that lack of sense to be found in all such gatherings, +had forgotten that it was not listening to a burst of eloquence which +had been duly written out and committed to memory for the occasion. + +But Roland Barker sprang to his feet, held both his hands up, to command +silence, and said, in a scarcely audible voice, as he trembled from head +to foot: "Hush, hush! She has told the truth! She has told the awful +truth! I never saw it all before. Heaven help you to bear it. It seems +to me I cannot!" + +Several were pale and weeping. I turned to speak to the woman who had +changed an evening's entertainment into a tragic scene; but she had +slipped out during the excitement. I took Barker's arm and we walked +towards the Avenue together. Neither of us spoke until we reached +Madison Square. Here the poor fellow sank into a seat and pulled me down +beside him. + +"Don't talk to me about theories after that," he said. "Great God! I am +more dead than alive. I feel fifty years older than when I went to that +little hall to teach those people how to live by my fine philosophy, +and I truly thought that I had tasted sorrow and found the key to +resignation. Ye gods!" + +"Perhaps you have," I said. + +"Yes, yes," he replied, impatiently; "but suppose I had to face life day +by day, hour by hour, as that woman pictured it--and she was a lady with +as keen a sense of pain as I--what do you suppose my philosophy would do +for me then? Do you think I could endure it? And I went there to teach +those people how to suffer and be strong!" + +"Look here, Barker," I said, "you'd better go home now and go to bed. +You are cold and tired, and this won't help matters any." + +"What will?" he asked. + +I made no reply. When we reached his door he asked again: + +"What will?" + +I shook my head and left him standing in the brilliant hall of his +beautiful home, dazed and puzzled and alone. + + + + +II. + +The next time I met Roland Barker he grasped my hand and said excitedly: +"I have found that woman! What she said is all true. My God! what is +to be done? I feel like a strong man tied hand and foot, while devilish +vultures feed on the flesh of living babes before my eyes!" + +"Stop, Barker," I said; "stop, and go away for a while, or you will go +mad. What have you been doing? Look at your hands; they tremble like the +hands of a palsied man; and your face; why, Barker, your face is haggard +and set, and your hair is actually turning gray! What in the name of all +that's holy have you been doing?" + +"Nothing, absolutely nothing!" he exclaimed "That is the trouble! +What _can_ I do? I tell you something is wrong, Gordon, something is +desperately wrong in this world. Look at that pile of stone over there: +millions of dollars are built into that. It is opened once each week, +aired, cleaned, and put in order for a fashionable audience dressed in +silk and broadcloth. They call it a church, but it is simply a popular +club house, which, unlike other club houses, hasn't the grace to pay +its own taxes. They use that club house, let us say, three hours in all, +each week, for what? To listen to elaborate music and fine-spun theories +about another world. They are asked to, and they give money to send +these same theories to nations far away, who--to put it mildly--are +quite as well off without them. Then that house is closed for a week, +and those who sat there really believe that they have done what is right +by their fellow-men! Their natural consciences, their sense of right +and justice, have been given an anaesthetic. 'The poor ye have with you +always,' they are taught to believe, is not only true, but _right_. I +tell you, Gordon, it is all perfectly damnable, and it seems to me that +I cannot bear it when I remember that woman." + +"She is only one of a great many," I suggested. + +Roland Barker groaned: "My God! that is the trouble--so many that the +thing seems hopeless. And to think that on every one of even these poor +souls is laid another burden that that stone spire may go untaxed!" + +"Barker," I said, laying my hand on his arm, "tell me what has forced +all this upon you with such a terrible weight just now." + +"Not here, not now," he said. "I have written it down just as she told +it to me--you know I learned stenography when I began taking an interest +in public meetings. Well, I've just been copying those notes out. They +are in my pocket," he said, laying his hand on his breast. "They seem to +burn my very soul. I would not dare to trust myself to read them to you +here. Come home with me." + +When we were seated in his magnificent library, he glanced about him, +and with a wave of his hand said, with infinite satire: "You will notice +the striking appropriateness of the surroundings and the subject." + +"No doubt," I said. "I have often noticed that before, especially the +last time I heard a sermon preached to three of the Vanderbilts, +two Astors, five other millionaires, and about sixty more consistent +Christians, all of whom were wealthy. The subject was Christ's advice to +the rich young man, 'Sell all thou hast and give to the poor.' But never +mind; go on; the day has passed when deed and creed are supposed to hold +the slightest relation to each other; and what is a $20,000 salary for +if not to buy sufficient ability to explain it all sweetly away and +administer, at the same time, an anæsthetic to the natural consciences +of men?" + +I settled myself in a large Turkish chair on one side of the splendidly +carved table; he stood on the other side sorting a manuscript. Presently +he began reading it. "'When I married Frank Melville he was strong and +grand and brave; a truer man never lived. He had been educated for the +law. His practice was small, but we were able to live very well on +what he made, and the prospect for the future was bright. We loved each +other--but, ah! there are no words to tell that. We worshipped each +other as only two who have been happily mated can ever understand. We +lived up to his salary. Perhaps you will say that that was not wise. We +thought it was. A good appearance, a fairly good appearance at least, +was all that we could make, and to hold his own in his profession, this +was necessary. You know how that is. A shabby-looking man soon loses his +hold on paying clients. Of course he would not dress well and allow me +to be ill-clad. He--he loved me. We were never able to lay by anything; +but we were young and strong and hopeful--and we loved each other.'" +Barker's voice trembled. He looked at me a moment and then said very +low: "If you could have seen her poor, tired, beautiful eyes when she +said that." + +"I can imagine how she looked," I said. "She had a face one remembers." + +After a little he went on: "We had both been brought up to live well. +Our friends were people of culture, and we--it will sound strange to you +for me to say that our love and devotion were the admiration and talk of +all of them. + +"'By-and-by I was taken ill. My husband could not bear to think of me as +at home alone, suffering He stayed with me a great deal. I did not know +that he was neglecting his business; I think he did not realize it then; +he thought he could make it all up; he was strong and--he loved me. At +last the doctors told him that I should die if he did not take me away; +I ought to have an ocean voyage. It almost killed him that he could not +give me that. We had not the money. He took me away a little while where +I could breathe the salt air, and the good it did me made his heart only +the sadder when he saw that it was true that all I needed was an ocean +voyage. The climate of his home was slowly killing me. We bore it as +long as we dared, and I got so weak that he almost went mad. Then we +moved here, where my health was good. But it was a terrible task to get +business; there were so many others like him, all fighting, as if for +life, for money enough to live on from day to day. The strain was +too much for him, and just as he began to gain a footing he fell ill, +and--and if we had had money enough for him to take a rest then, and +have proper care, good doctors, and be relieved from immediate anxiety, +he would have gotten well, with my care--I loved him so! But as it +was--' Shall I show you the end?" Barker stopped, he was trembling +violently, his eyes were full of tears. I waited. Presently he said, +huskily: "Shall I tell you, Gordon, what I saw? I have not gotten over +it yet. She laid her finger on her lips and motioned me to follow. The +room where we had been was poor and bare. She took a key from her bosom, +opened a door, and went in. I followed. Sitting in the only comfortable +chair--which had been handsome once--was a magnificent-looking man, so +far as mere physical proportions can make one that. + +"'Darling,' she said tenderly, as if talking to a little child. +'Darling, I have brought you a present. Are you glad?' + +"She handed him a withered rose that I had carelessly dropped as I went +in. + +"He arose, bowed to me when she presented me, waved me to his chair, +took the flower, looked at her with infinite love, and said: 'To-morrow, +little wife; wait till to-morrow.' + +"Then he sat down, evidently unconscious of my presence, and gazed +steadily at her for a moment, seeming to forget all else and to struggle +with some thought that constantly eluded him. She patted his hand as if +he were a child, smiling through her heart-break all the while, kissed +him, and motioned me to precede her from the room. + +"When she came out she locked the door carefully behind her, sank into a +chair, covered her face with her hands, and sobbed as if her heart would +break. After a while she said: 'A little money would have saved, him and +now it is too late, too late. Sometimes he is violent, sometimes like +that. The doctors say the end is not far off, and that any moment he +may kill me, and afterwards awake to know it! It is all the result of +poverty _with love!'_ she said. Then, passionately: 'If I did not love +him so I could bear it, but _I cannot, I cannot!_ And how will _he_ bear +it if he ever harms me--and I not there to help him?'" + +Barker stepped to the window to hide his emotion. Presently he said, in +a voice that trembled: "If she did not love him so she could let him +go to some--asylum; but she knows the end is sure, and not far off, +and that the gleams of light he has are when he sees her face. She has +parted with everything that made life attractive to keep food and warmth +for him. She is simply existing now from day to day--one constant agony +of soul and sense--waiting for the end. She allowed me to take a doctor +to see him; I would have come for you, but you were out of town. He only +confirmed what others had told her a year ago. He advised her to have +him put in a safe place before he did some violence; but she refused, +and made us promise not to interfere. She said he would be able to harm +no one but her, if he became violent at the last, and she was ready for +that. It was easier far to live that way and wait for that each day +than to have him taken away where he would be unhappy and perhaps +ill-treated. He needed her care and love beside him every hour, and she +--she needed nothing." + +Here Barker flung himself into a chair and let his head fall on his +folded arms on the table. + +"That is the way love makes poverty easy to bear," he said, bitterly, +after a time, and his trembling hands clinched tight together. + +"Did you give her any money?" I asked. + +He groaned. "Yes, yes, I--that is, I left some on the table under her +sewing. She isn't the kind of woman one can offer charity. She--" + +"No," I said, "she isn't, and beside, for the pain that tortures her it +is too late now for money to help. Only it may relieve her somewhat to +feel sure that she can get what he needs to eat and wear and to keep him +warm and allow her to be free from the necessity of outside work. I am +glad you left the money. But--but--Barker, do you think she will use it, +coming that way and from a stranger?" + +He looked up forlornly. "No, I don't," he said; "and yet she may. I will +hope so; but if she does, what then? The terrible question will still +remain just where it was. That is no way to solve it; we can't bail out +the ocean with a thimble. And what an infamous imposition all this talk +is of 'resignation' to such as she; for her terrible calm, as she talked +to me, had no hint of resignation in it. She is simply, calmly, quietly +desperate now--and she is one of many." He groaned aloud. + +"Will you take me there the next time you go?" I asked. + +"She said I must not come back; she could not be an object of +curiosity--nor allow him to be. She said that she allowed me to come +this time because on the night we first saw her she had stepped into +that little hall to keep herself from freezing in her thin clothes as +she was making her way home, and she saw that I was earnest in what I +said, and she stayed to listen--" his voice broke again. + +Just then the drapery was drawn back, and his wife, superbly robed, +swept in, bringing a bevy of girls. + +"Oh, Mr. Barker," said one, gayly, "you don't know what you missed +to-night by deserting our theatre party; it was all so real--love in +rags, you know, and all that sort of thing; only I really don't like to +see _quite_ so much attention paid to the 'Suffering poor,' with a big +S, and the lower classes generally. I think the stage can do far better +than that, don't you? But it is the new fad, I suppose, and after all I +fancy it doesn't do much harm, only as it makes that sort of people more +insufferably obtrusive about putting their ill-clad, bad-smelling woes +before the rest of us. What a beautiful vase this is, Mrs. Barker! May I +take it to the light?" + +"Certainly, my dear," laughed Mrs. Barker; "and I agree with you, as +usual. I think it is an exquisite vase--and that the stage is becoming +demoralized. It is pandering to the low taste for representations of +low life. I confess I don't like it. That sort of people do not have the +feelings to be hurt--the fine sensibilities and emotions attributed to +them. Those grow up in refined and delicate surroundings. That is what I +often tell Roland when he insists upon making himself unhappy over some +new 'case' of destitution. I tell him to send them five dollars by mail +and not to worry himself, and I won't allow him to worry me with his +Christie-street emotions." + +Barker winced, and I excused myself and withdrew, speculating on certain +phases of delicacy of feeling and fine sensibility. + + + + +III. + +I did not see Barker again for nearly three weeks, when one night my +bell was rung with unusual violence, and I heard an excited voice in my +hall. "Be quick, John; hurry," it said, "and tell the doctor I must see +him at once. Tell him it is Roland Barker." + +John had evidently demurred at calling me at so late an hour. + +"All right, Barker; I'll be down in a moment," I called from above. "No, +come up. You can tell me what is the matter while I dress. Is it for +yourself? There, go in that side room, I can hear you, and I'll be +dressed in a moment." + +"Hurry, hurry," he said, excitedly, "I'll tell you on the way. I have my +carriage. Don't wait to order yours, only hurry, hurry, hurry." + +Once in the carriage, I said: "Barker, you are going to use yourself up, +this way. You can't keep this sort of thing up much longer. You'd better +go abroad." + +"Drive faster," he called, to the man on top. Then to me, "If you are +not the first doctor there? there will be a dreadful scene. They will +most likely arrest her for murder." + +"Whom?" said I. "You have told me nothing, and how can I prevent that if +a murder has been committed?" + +"By giving her a regular death certificate," said he, coolly, "saying +that you attended the case, and that it was a natural death. I depend +upon you, Gordon; it would be simply infamous to make her suffer any +more. I cannot help her now, but you can, you _must_. No one will know +the truth but us, and afterwards we can help her--to forget. She is not +an old woman; there may be something in life for her yet." + +"Is it the Lady of the Club?" I asked. We had always called her that +"What has she done?" + +"Yes," he said, "it is the 'Lady of the Club.' and she has poisoned her +husband." + +"Good God!" exclaimed I; "and you want me to give her a regular death +certificate and say I attended the case?" + +"You must," he said; "it would be infamous not to. She could not bear it +any longer. She found herself breaking down, and she would not leave him +alive without her care and love. He had become almost helpless, except +when short violent spells came on. These left him exhausted. He almost +killed her in the last one. Her terror was that he would do so and +then regain his reason--that he would know it afterwards and perhaps be +dragged through the courts. She had been working in a chemist's office, +it seems, when she was able to do anything. She took some aconitine, and +to-night she put everything in perfect order, gave him the best supper +she could, got him to bed, and then--gave him that. She sent for me and +told me as calmly as--God! it was the calm of absolute desperation. +She sat there when I went in, holding his poor dead hand and kissing it +reverently. She laid it down and told me what I tell you. There was +not a tear, a moan, a sigh. She said: 'Here is the money you left--all +except what I paid for his supper to-night. We had gotten down to that +before I had the chance to steal the poison or the courage to give it to +him. I had not meant to use any of the money; the rest is here. I would +like it used--if you are willing--to bury him decently, not in the +Potter's Field, and I would like--if you will take the trouble--to have +it done absolutely privately. We have borne enough. I cannot bear for +even his ashes to be subjected to any further humiliation.'" + +Roland Barker paused to command himself. "Of course I promised her," he +went on, after a time. "She does not realize that she may be arrested +and have his poor body desecrated to find the cause of death. That would +make her insane--even if-- Drive faster!" he called out again to the +man outside. When we reached the house he said: "Be prepared to see her +perfectly calm. It is frightful to witness, and I tremble for the result +later on." + +When we knocked on her door there was no response. I pushed it open and +entered first. The room was empty. We went to the inner doer and rapped +gently, then louder. There was no sound. Barker opened the door, and +then stepped quickly back and closed it. "She is kneeling there by his +bed," he said; "write the certificate here and give it to me. Then I +will bring an undertaker and--he and I can attend to everything else. I +did want you to see her. I think you should give her something to make +her sleep. That forced calm will make her lose her mind. She is so +shattered you would not recognize her." + +"Stay here, Barker," I said; "I want to see her alone for a moment. I +will tell her who I am and that you brought me--if I need to." + +He eyed me sharply, but I stepped hastily into the inner room. I touched +the shoulder and then the forehead of the kneeling form. It did not +move. "Just as I expected," I muttered, and lifting the lifeless body +in my arms I laid it gently beside her husband. In one hand she held +the vial from which she had taken the last drop of the deadly drug, and +clasped in the other her husband's fingers. She had been dead but a few +moments, and both she and her husband were robed for the grave. + +When I returned to the outer room I found Barker with a note in his +hand, and a shocked and horrified look on his face. He glanced up at me +through his tears. + +"We were too late," he said. "She left this note for me. I found it here +on the table. She meant to do it all along, and that is why she was so +calm and had no fears for herself." + +"I thought so when you told me what she had done," said I. + +"Did you? I did not for a moment, or I would have stayed and tried to +reason her out of it." + +"It is best as it is," said I, "and you could not have reasoned her out +of it. It was inevitable--after the rest. Take this certificate too; you +will need both." + +When all was safely over, as we drove home from the new graves two days +later, Barker said: "Is this the solution?" + +I did not reply. + +Presently he said: "To the dead, who cannot suffer, we can be kind and +shield them even from themselves. Is there no way to help the living? A +few hundred dollars, two short years ago, would have saved all this, and +there was no way for her to get it. She knew it _all_ then, and there +was no help!" + +"Why did she not, in such a case as that, push back her pride and go +to some one? There must be thousands who would have gladly responded to +such a call as that," I argued. + +He buried his face in his hands for a moment and shuddered. At last +he said: "She did--she went to three good men, men who had known, been +friendly with, admired her and her husband. Two of them are worth their +millions, the other one is rich. She only asked to borrow, and promised +to repay it herself if she had to live and work after he were dead to do +it!" + +He paused. + +"You do not mean to tell me that they refused--and they old friends and +rich?" I asked, amazed. + +"I mean to say just this: they one and all made some excuse; they did +not let her have it." + +"She told them what the doctors said, and of her fears?" + +"She did," he answered, sadly. + +"And yet you say they are good men!" I exclaimed, indignantly. + +"Good, benevolent, charitable, every one of them," he answered. + +"Were you one of them, Barker?" I asked, after a moment's pause. + +"Thank God, no!" he replied. "But perhaps in some other case I have done +the same, if I only knew the whole story. Those men do not know this +last, you must remember." + +"And the worst of it is, we dare not tell them," said I, as we parted. + +"No, we dare not," he replied, and left me standing with the copy of the +burial certificate in my hand. + +"Natural causes?" I said to myself, looking at it. "Died of natural +causes--the brutality and selfishness of man--and poverty with love. +_Natural_ causes! Yes." And I closed my office door and turned out the +light. + + + + +UNDER PROTEST. + +_"This is my story, sir; a trifle, indeed, I assure you._ + +_"Much more, perchance, might be said; but I hold him, of all men, most +lightly Who swerves from the truth in his tale."_ + +Bret Harte. + + +When the new family moved into, and we were told had bought, the cottage +nearest our own, we were naturally interested in finding out what kind +of people they were, and whether we had gained or lost by the change of +neighbors. + +In a summer place like this it makes a good deal of difference just what +kind of people live so near to you that when you are sitting on your +veranda and they are swinging in hammocks on theirs, the most of the +conversation is common property, unless you whisper, and one does not +want to spend three or four months of each year mentally and verbally +tiptoeing about one's own premises. Then, on the other hand, there +are few less agreeable situations to be placed in than to be forced to +listen to confidences or quarrels with which you have nothing whatever +to do, or else be deprived of the comforts and pleasures of out-door +life, to secure which you endure so many other annoyances. + +Our new neighbors were, therefore, as you will admit, of the utmost +interest and importance to us, and I was naturally very much pleased, at +the end of the first week, when I returned one day from a fishing party, +from which my wife's headache had detained her, by the report she gave +me of their attitude toward each other. (From her glowing estimate, I +drew rose-colored pictures of their probable kindliness and generosity +toward others.) Up to this time they had been but seldom outside of +their house, and we had not gathered much information of their doings, +except the fact that a good deal of nice furniture had come, and they +appeared to be greatly taken up in beautifying and arranging their +cottage. This much promised well, so far as it went; but we had not +lived to our time of life not to find out, long ago, that the most +exquisitely appointed houses sometimes lack the one essential feature; +that is, ladies and gentlemen to occupy them. + +"They are lovely!" said my wife, the moment I entered the door, before +I had been able to deposit my fishing-tackle and ask after her headache. +"They are lovely; at least he is," she amended. "I am sure we shall +be pleased with them; or, at least, with him. A man as careful of, and +attentive to, his wife as he is can't help being an agreeable neighbor." + +"Good!" said I. "How did you find out? And how is your headache?--Had +a disgusting time fishing. Glad you did not go. Sun was hot; breeze +was hot; boatman's temper was a hundred and twenty in the shade; bait +wouldn't stay on the hooks, and there weren't any fish any way. But how +did you say your head is?" + +"My head?" said my wife, with that retrospective tone women have, which +seemed to indicate that if she had ever had a head, and if her head had +ever ached, and if headache was a matter of sufficient importance to +remember, in all human probability it had recovered in due time. "My +head? Oh, yes--Oh, it is all right; but you really never did see any one +so tractable as that man. And adaptable! Why, it is a perfect wonder. Of +course I had no business to look or listen; but I did. I just couldn't +help it. The fact is, I thought they were quarrelling at first, and I +almost fainted. I said to myself, 'If they are that kind of people +we will sell out. I will not live under the constant drippings of +ill-temper.' Quarrelling ought to be a penitentiary offence; that is, +I mean the bickerings and naggings most people dignify by that name. I +could endure a good, square, stand-up and knock down quarrel, that had +some character to it; but the eternal differences, often expressed by +the tones of voice only, I can't stand." I smiled an emphatic assent, +and my wife went on. + +"Well, I must confess his tones of voice are, at times, against him; but +I'm not sure that it is not due to the distance. _All_ of his tones may +not carry this far. I'm sure they don't, for when I first heard him, +and made up my mind that it was a horrid, common, plebeian little row, +I went to the west bedroom window--you know it looks directly into their +kitchen--and what do you suppose I saw?" + +The question was so sudden and wholly unexpected, and my mental +apparatus was so taken up with the story that I found myself with no +ideas whatever on the subject Indeed I do not believe that my wife +wanted me to guess what she saw, half so much as she wanted breath; but +I gave the only reply which the circumstances appeared to admit of, and +which, I was pleased to see, in spite of its seeming inadequacy, was +as perfectly satisfactory to the blessed little woman as if it had been +made to order and proven a perfect fit. + +"I can't imagine," said I. + +"Of course you can't," she replied, pushing my crossed legs into +position, and seating herself on my knees. + +"Of course you can't. A man couldn't. Well, it seems their servant left +last night, and that blessed man was washing the dishes this morning. +The difference of opinion had been over which one of them should do it." + +"Why, the confounded brute!" said I. "He is a good deal better able to +do it than she is. She looks sick, and so long as he has no business +to attend to down here, he has as much time as she and a good deal more +strength to do that kind of work." + +"Well, I just knew you'd look at it that way," said my wife, with an +inflection of pride and admiration which indicated that I had made a +ten strike of some kind, of which few men--and not many women--would be +capable. + +"But that was not it at all," continued she. + +I began laboriously to readjust my mental moorings to this seemingly +complicated situation, and was on the verge of wondering why my wife was +so pleased with me for simply making a mistake, when she began again, +after giving me a little pat of unqualified satisfaction and sympathy. + +"They both wanted to do it. She said she wasn't a bit tired and could do +it alone just as well as not, and he'd break the glasses with his funny, +great, big fingers; and he said he'd be careful not to break anything, +and that the dish-water would spoil her hands." + +"Good," said I, "I shall like the fellow. I------" + +"Of course you will," my wife broke in, enthusiastically; "but that +isn't all. I went to sleep after that, and later on was awakened by a +loud--and as I thought at the time--a very angry voice. I went to +the window again only to see a laughing scuffle between them over the +potato-knife. She wanted to scrape them and he wanted to scrape them. Of +course he got the knife, and it really did look too comical to see him +work with those little bulbs. He put his whole mind on them, and he +didn't catch her picking over the berries until she was nearly done. +Then he scolded again. He said he did the potatoes to keep her from +getting her thumb and forefinger black, and here she was with her whole +hand covered with berry stain. He seemed really vexed, and I must say +his voice doesn't carry this far as if he was half as nice as he is. +I think there ought to be a chair of voices attached to every +school-house--so to speak--and the result of the training made one of +the tests of admission to the colleges of the country. Don't you?" + +Again I was wholly unprepared for her sudden question, and was only +slowly clambering around the idea she had suggested, so I said--somewhat +irrelevantly, no doubt--"It may be." + +She looked at me for a moment without speaking, and then said, as she +got up and crossed the room: "You didn't hear a word I said, and you +don't begin to appreciate that man anyway." + +"I did hear you, dear," I protested; "I was listening as hard as I +could--and awfully interested--but a fellow can't skip along at that +rate and have well-matured views on tap without a moment's warning. +You've got to be like the noble ladies in the 'Lay of the Last +Minstrel,' 'and give me heart and give me time.' Now _they_ understood +men. We're slow." + +She laughed and tied the last pink bow in the lace of a coquettish +little white gown and dragged me out on the veranda. + +Our new neighbors were out ahead of us. + +"I don't think so at all, Margaret," we heard him say, as we took our +chairs near the edge of the porch to catch any stray breeze that might +be wandering our way. + +"Sh--," we heard her say; "don't talk so loud. They will think you are +going to scalp me." + +"Oh, don't bother about the neighbors; let 'em hear," said he, "let 'em +think. Who cares? If they haven't got anything better to do than sit +around and think, they'd better move away from our neighborhood." + +"Sh--said she again, looking at him with a good deal of emphasis in her +eyes. + +"Well, it is too bad, isn't it?" acquiesced he, in a much lower voice, +and one from which every vestige of the tone of protest had vanished. + +"It _is_ too bad that these summer cottages are built so close together +that you can't tie your shoes without being overheard by the folks next +door? It makes me nervous. I feel as if I had to sit up straight all +the time and smile like a crocodile, or else run the risk of being +misunderstood." + +"It _is_ trying, dear," she said, "and destroys a good deal of the +comfort and ease of one's outing." + +"Nothing of the kind," began he, so explosively as to make my wife jump. + +"Sh--," whispered the lady next door, but he went on. + +"Nothing of the kind. I don't let it bother me in the least. They can +attend to their own affairs, and I----" + +"Sh--," said his wife; "suppose we walk down to the beach." She began to +adjust her wrap. + +"It is a good deal more comfortable here," he protested, "and besides +I'm tired." + +"So you are, of course," she said, regretfully. "I forgot. Such unusual +work for a man would tire him;" and she loosened the lace veil she had +drawn over her head and reseated herself. + +"Well, are you ready?" questioned he, clapping on his hat and suddenly +starting down the steps. + +"Ready for what?" asked she, in surprise. + +"The deuce, Margaret. I thought you said that you were going to the +beach!" + +She got up, readjusted her veil, took her wrap on her arm, and ran +lightly after him. + +"I wonder if I shall need this wrap?" she said as she passed our gate. + +"Heavens! no," he replied, "and it will heat you all up to carry it. +Here, give it to me. I don't see what on earth you brought it for. I'm +certainly hot enough without loading me up with this." + +"I will carry it," she said, cheerfully; "I don't feel the heat on my +arm as you do--or I'll run back and leave it on the porch. You walk +slowly. I can easily catch up." + +She started; but he took the shawl from her, threw it lightly over his +shoulder, and, pulling her hand through his arm, said gayly, and in the +most compliant tone: "It isn't very warm. I won't notice this little +thing and, besides, you'll need it down there, as like as not." + +When they were out of hearing my wife drew a long breath and said: "I +wonder if we ever sound like that to other people?--and yet, they seem +to be devoted to each other," she added hastily. + +"They are, no doubt," said I, "only he appears to be a chronic kicker." + +"A comic what?" said my wife, in so loud a tone that I involuntarily +exclaimed "Sh--!" + +We both laughed. Then she said: "But really, dear, I didn't understand +what you said he was. There doesn't seem to me to be anything comic +about him, though. And----" + +"Comic! Well, I should think not," said I. "I should think it would be +anything but comic to that little woman to go through that sort of thing +every time she opened her mouth. What I said was that he seems to be +a chronic kicker, and I might add--with some show of fairness--that he +impresses me as the champion of Kicktown at that." + +"Sh--," laughed my wife, "they're coming back." + +"I don't agree with you at all. There is no need to do anything of the +kind," were the first words we heard from a somewhat distant couple, and +my wife concluded that our new neighbors were not very far off. "It +would be no end of trouble for you. You'd get all tired out; and +besides, what do we owe to the Joneses that makes it necessary for you +to disturb all our little comforts to ask them down here?" he continued. +We could not hear her reply; but his protest and evident deep +dissatisfaction with the whole scheme went bravely on. + +She passed into the house and left him on the steps. When she came out +a few moments later he said, sweetly: "As I was just saying, it will be +quite a diversion for you to see the girls, and I'd enjoy the old man +hugely. He's a jolly old coon; and then we owe it to them after all they +did for you." + +"What girls? What old man is a jolly coon?" asked she, in an utterly +bewildered tone. + +"Margaret! The Joneses, of course. Whom have we been talking about for +the last half-hour?" exploded he. + +"Oh," said she, having evidently quite given over asking the Joneses, +and become occupied with other thoughts, "I thought the idea did not +please you. But I'm so glad. It will do you good to have him here, and I +shall be delighted." + +"Do me good!" exploded he. "Do me good! Tiresome old bore, if there ever +was one. Women are queer fish to deal with, but I'm sure I don't care +whom you invite here." + +Our neighbors withdrew for the night and we sighed with relief. About +two o'clock my wife touched me to find if I was asleep. The movement +was so stealthy that I inferred at once that there were burglars in the +house. I was wide awake in an instant. + +"What is it?" I whispered. + +"Well, I'm glad you're awake. I want to know what that was you called +the man next door. I forgot what it was, and I couldn't sleep for trying +to remember." + +I laughed. "I believe I said that he impressed me as one so addicted +to the reprehensible habit of protest--on general principles, as +it were--that it had now become the normal condition of his mental +constitution." + +"You didn't say any such thing," said she. "You--" + +"I believe that at the time of which you speak I allowed myself to be +guilty of a habit you do not wholly admire; but I really had no idea it +would keep you awake. I used slang. I said that he was a chronic kicker, +and--" + +"That's it! That's it!" exclaimed she, with deep satisfaction. "He's a +'chronic kicker.' Well, if you'll believe me, he hasn't stopped kicking +long enough to say his prayers decently since we went to bed. First +about what time it was; then about which room they'd sleep in; then +there was too much cover; then the windows were wrong; then--oh, +heavens!--I wonder if he kicks in his sleep? He always comes around to +reason in time; but if there was ever anything more maddening to meet +than that constant wall of protest--for the sake of protest--I don't +know what it could be." + +"Nor--I," said I, half asleep. + +Presently her hand grasped mine vigorously, and I sprang up startled, +for I had been sound asleep again. "What's the matter?" I said, in a +loud tone. + +"Sh--," whispered my wife. "Don't speak in that tone. I'd rather people +would think you stayed out nights, than to suppose you stayed at home +and nagged me. He's at it again. I'd most gone to sleep and his voice +nearly scared the life out of me. She wanted to close the window. He +objected, of course; said he'd smother--sh--" + +Just then we heard our neighbor's wife ask sleepily: "What are you +doing, dear?" + +"Closing this detestable window. Lets in too much salt air. 'Fraid +you'll get chilled. I am. Where's another blanket?" + +The window went down with a bang, and we heard no more of our neighbors +that night. But the next morning the same thing began again, and I do +not believe that during that entire summer he ever agreed with his wife +the first time she spoke, nor failed to come around to her view after he +took time to think it over. I remember when I was introduced to him, +a week later, his wife said: "This is our nearest neighbor, you know, +Thomas, and--" + +"No, he isn't, Margaret; the people back of us are nearer," he said. +Then to me: "Pleased to meet you. I believe our wives have become quite +good friends. I'm very glad for Margaret's sake, too. It's dull for her +with only an old fellow like me to entertain her, and she not very well. +And then, as she says, you are our nearest neighbor, and we really ought +not to be too ceremonious at such a place as this." + +"I thought, Thomas," suggested his wife, "that you said one could not +be too particular. Why, you quite blustered when I first told you I had +made advances to some of the other--" + +"Nonsense! I did nothing of the kind," broke in he. "What on earth ever +put such an idea into your head, Margaret? You know I always say that +without pleasant neighbors, and friendly relations with them, a summer +cottage is no place for a white man to live." + +My wife hastened to change the subject. Nothing on earth is more +distasteful to her than a family contest, of even a very mild type, +especially when the tones of voice seem to express more of indignation +and a desire to override, than a mere difference of opinion. She thought +the surf a safe subject. + +"Was not the water lovely to-day? You were in, I suppose?" she inquired +of our neighbor's wife. + +"Yes, we were in," she began, enthusiastically. "It was perfect and--" + +"I don't know what you call perfect," broke in he, "I called it beastly. +It was so cold I felt like a frog when I got out, and you looked half +frozen. The fact is, this is too far north to bathe for pleasure in the +surf. It may be good for one's health, but it is anything but pleasant. +Now at Old Point Comfort it is different. I like it there." + +"Why, James," said his wife, "I thought you preferred this because of +the more bracing and exhilarating effect." + +After a little more objection, which he seemed to think firmly +established his independence, he ended his remarks thus: + +"Of course, as you say, it is more bracing. Yes, that's a fact, +Margaret. I couldn't help noticing when I came out this morning that I +felt like a new man, and you--why, 'pon my word, you looked as bright +and rosy as a girl of sixteen. Oh, the surf here is great. It really is. +I like it; don't you?" + +This last he had addressed to me. I was so occupied in a study of, and +so astonished by, the facility with which he took his mental flops, +after enjoying his little "kick," that I was taken off my feet by his +sudden appeal to me, and was quite at a loss for a reply which would do +justice to the occasion, and at the same time put a stop to the contest +between husband and wife. + +But, as usual, my wife hastened to my rescue and covered my confusion by +her gay little laugh and explanation. + +"Ha, ha, ha," she laughed, "you have caught my husband napping already. +I know exactly where he was. He was lumbering along through an elaborate +speculation on, and a comparison of, the relative merits of--" here +she began telling them off on her fingers to the great amusement of our +neighbors--"first, fresh and salt water bathing; second, the method, +time, place, and condition of each as affected by the moon, stars, +and Gulf Stream. He was, most likely, climbing over Norway with +a thermometer, or poking a test-tube of some kind into the +semi-liquefaction which passes itself off as water to those unfortunates +who are stranded along the shores of the Mississippi. Just wait; one of +these days he will get down to our discussion and he'll agree with us +when he gets there. But don't hurry him." + +We all joined in the laugh at my expense; and I remarked that I had +served so long as a target for my wife's fun that even if I could skip +around, mentally, at as lively a rate as she seemed to expect, I would +pretend that I couldn't, in order not to deprive her of her chief source +of amusement. At this point our neighbor's new cook came to the edge +of their porch and asked her mistress if she might speak to her for a +moment. She arose to go. + +"Oh, thunder, Margaret, I hope you don't intend to allow that worthless +girl to call you home every time you go any place. Tell her to wait. It +can't be much she wants," said our neighbor. + +"Jane," said his wife sweetly, reseating herself, "you can wait until I +come home. It won't be long." + +"I wonder if you'd better do that, Margaret," said he, just as our wives +had begun to discuss something relative to housekeeping. "Jane is a +good girl, and she wouldn't call you if it were not something important, +Don't you think we had better go at once?" + +"I did think so," said she, and bidding us goodnight our neighbors +crossed the lawn and re-entered their own door and closed it for the +night. + +After a long pause my wife said, in a stage whisper: "I suppose it is +his way of showing that he is 'boss,' as the boys say--the final +appeal in his own household--his idea of the dignity of the masculine +prerogative." + +A sudden stop. I thought she expected me to say something, so I began: + +"I don't know. I doubt it. It looks to me like a case of--" + +"Don't! don't!" exclaimed my wife, in tragic accents "oh, _don't_ catch +it. I really couldn't live with a chronic objector. Anything else. I +really believe I could stand any other phase of bullying better than +that--to feel that at any minute I am liable to run against a solid wall +of 'I don't agree with you!' If it were _real_ I wouldn't mind it so +much; but to hear that man 'kick,' as you say, just for the sake +of asserting himself, and then come around as he does, is perfectly +maddening. The very first symptom I see in you I shall look upon it as a +danger signal--I'll move." + +At that moment, before our quiet little laugh, at their expense, had +died away, there floated out from the bedroom window of our neighbors' +cottage, this refrain: + +"Well, goodness knows, Margaret, _I_ didn't want to come home. I knew it +was all perfect nonsense. If you--" + +My wife suddenly arose, took me by the hand and said quite seriously: +"Come in the house, dear. This atmosphere is too unwholesome to endure +any longer." + +The next day she said to me, "Let's go to Old Point Comfort next year." + +"All right," said I; "but what shall we do with the cottage? You know we +hold the lease for another year, with the 'refusal' to buy." + +"Rent it to your worst enemy, or, better still, get him to buy it. Just +think of the exquisite revenge you could take that way. Twenty-four +hours every day, for four long months each year, to know that you had +him planted next door to a 'chronic kicker.' Or don't you hate anybody +bad enough for that?" and my wife actually shuddered. + +"I don't believe I do, dear," said I; "but I'll do my level best to +_rent_ it to him for one season. You know I wouldn't care to murder him; +if he's hopelessly maimed I'll be satisfied." + +We both laughed; but the next day I advertised the lease of a cottage +for sale very cheap, and gave as a reason my desire to go where there +were fewer people. I think this will catch my enemy. He likes a crowd, +and he'd enjoy nothing better than to feel that I was forced to pay half +of his rent. So I marked the paper and sent it to him, and confidently +await the result. + + + + +FOR THE PROSECUTION. + +_"So deeply inherent is it in this life of ours that men have to suffer +for each other's sins, so inevitably diffusive is human sufferings that +even Justice makes its victims, and we can conceive no retribution +that does not spread beyond its mark in pulsations of unmerited +pain."_--George Eliot. + + + + +I. + +Shortly after Fred Mathews began the practice of law he was elected to +the office of Prosecuting Attorney in the Western town to which he had +gone when first admitted to the bar. + +Of course, every law student becomes familiar with the jests and +gibes cast at the members of the profession as men who are peculiarly +economical of the truth. He smiles with those who hint that a lawyer is +always lavish of advice that leads to litigation. + +That students of Blackstone and Coke hear much merrymaking over and some +serious criticism of the quibbles to which the best of them are +supposed to resort--of making little of real evidence and much +of trivialities--goes without saying. Nor are they unaware of the +fact--alas! sometimes too well founded upon strong evidence--that +the general public appears to be convinced that laws are made for the +purpose of shielding the rich and oppressing the poor or unfortunate. + +No student of average ability enters practice uninformed that there is +a widespread belief that a man of social position or financial power +has little to fear as a result of his misdeeds, while his less fortunate +neighbor could not hope to escape the worst legal consequences of his +most trivial lapse from rectitude. + +Fred Mathews had made up his mind--as many a young fellow had done +before him--that he would do everything in his power to hold the scales +of justice level. + +He determined that such ability as he possessed should be used for the +benefit of society, and that neither bribe nor threat should ever entice +him from the strict performance of his duty to the profession which he +had entered. He would never accept a case in which he did not honestly +believe. No man's money should buy him and no man's wrath intimidate. In +short, he intended to be a lawyer with a conscience as well as a man of +integrity, no matter what the result might be. + +He made so good a beginning in the first two years of his practice that +it was at the end of the third, when he found himself holding the office +of Prosecuting Attorney, with a record clean, and fair sailing ahead, +that a piece of news which came to him caused him to doubt himself for +the first time. + +The shock of that doubt thrilled every fibre in his nature, for with it +came the one fear that is terrible to a brave mind which is aroused for +the first time to its own possibilities--the fear to trust itself--the +dread lest it betray its own higher nature under the pressure of old +habits of thought or new social problems. + +Right and wrong had always seemed to him to have the most decided and +clear-cut outlines. He had never thought of himself as standing before +them unable to distinguish their boundaries. He had felt that he could +answer bravely enough the question: "What would you do if required to +choose between honor and dishonor?" It was a strange thing to him that +his present perplexity should grow out of a simple burglary case. There +did not appear to him, at first, to be more than one side to such a +case. He was the Prosecuting Attorney. A store had been robbed. Among +other things a sealskin sacque was taken. By means of this cloak the +burglary had been traced--it was claimed--to a certain young man high +in social life. The duties of his office had led the State's attorney to +prosecute the investigation with his usual vigor and impartiality until +he had succeeded beyond his fairest hopes. Indeed, the chain of evidence +now in his possession was so strong and complete that he--for the first +time in his career--recognized that he shrank from using the testimony +at his command. + +He felt that it was his duty to cause to be apprehended a young man who +had up to the present time borne a spotless reputation; who had been a +fellow student at college; whose social position was that of a leader, +and who was soon to marry one of the most charming girls in the town. +The situation was painful, but Fred Mathews felt that his own honor was +at stake quite as truly as was that of his old schoolfellow. Here was +his first opportunity to show that he held his duty above his desires. +Here was the first case in which social influence and financial power +were on the side of a criminal whom it was his duty to prosecute to the +end. + +His professional pride, as well as his honor, was enlisted; for this +was the third burglary which had been committed recently, and so far the +"gang"--as the newspapers assumed and the police believed the offenders +to be--had not been caught. + +Fred Mathews now thought he had every reason to believe that the same +hand had executed all three crimes and that the recklessness of +the last--the almost Wanton defiance of perfectly natural means of +precaution and concealment--had led to the discovery of this burglar in +high life. + +After long deliberation, however, the young prosecutor made up his +mind that he would so far compromise with his conscience as to make a +personal, private call upon the young man who was under suspicion and +boldly accuse him of the theft of the tell-tale cloak that had been +traced to him, and take the consequences. + +He was well aware that in case this course should lead to the escape of +the criminal he would be compelled to bear the abuse and suspicion which +would surely follow, for the evidence had passed through other hands +than his own. + +He knew that he was taking a method which would be called in question, +and that he would not take it if the suspected man lived in a less +fashionable street or had the misfortune to be low born. + +All this he knew quite well, and still he argued to himself that it was +the right thing for him to do, or at least that it was the best possible +under the circumstances, and that after giving Walter Banks a private +chance to clear himself--if such a thing were possible--he would still +be in a position to go on with the case, if that should be necessary. + +That night, for the first time in his career, he allowed himself to be +kept awake, not by the fear that he should fail through inexperience in +his duty to his client--as had happened sometimes to trouble him earlier +in his professional life--but by a dread that he should wilfully betray +his trust to the public. At two o'clock he lay staring at the wall, +asking himself if he was becoming corrupt; if he, too, believed in +shielding guilt if only that guilt were dressed in purple and spoke with +a soft and cultured accent. + + + + +II. + +"Mr. Banks will be down in a moment;" the trim maid had said, and left +the library door open as she withdrew. + +The young prosecutor walked about the room uneasily. He had hoped at +the last moment that the object of his call would be from home--that he +would take fright and refuse to be seen--that action had been taken by +the police which would put it out of his power to give the warning that +he now felt he was here to give. But, no. "Mr. Banks will be down in +a moment." He had heard quite distinctly, and there had not been the +slightest accent of fear or annoyance in the voice that spoke. + +In his agitation he had taken up a curiously wrought paper knife which +lay upon the table and had dropped it as if it had burned his fingers. + +"Good God!" he exclaimed. "_He_ was the college thief. It is no new +thing, then." + +He took up the knife again and examined it closely. There could be no +mistake. It was a gold wrought, elaborately engraved blade, set in a +handle which had no duplicate, for the students, who had planned the +gift which had so mysteriously disappeared had devised and caused to be +engraved a secret symbol which was cut deep in the polished surface. + +It was to have been a surprise for one of the favorites in the faculty. +It had disappeared--and here it was! + +"Good morning, Mathews. This is really very kind. I--" + +It was the voice of Walter Banks, but their eyes met over the fallen +paper knife, which had dropped from trembling fingers at the first word. + +A great wave of color rushed into the face of young Banks. The +prosecutor stood mute and pale. Involuntarily he had tried to cover the +knife with a corner of the rug as he turned to meet his host. It vaguely +dawned upon him that he was a guest in a house where he was playing the +part of a detective. His hand was extended in the hearty western fashion +which had become second nature to him, but Walter Banks did not take it. + +"Will you sit down?" said the host in a tone which was hoarse, and quite +unlike the frank, free voice that spoke a moment before. + +As he seated himself he bent forward and took up the bit of tell-tale +gold and ivory. Then he said, slowly in a tone that was scarcely +audible: + +"Yes, I took it. You are right. It _is_ the college knife." + +"Don't! don't!" exclaimed Fred Mathews, rising. "I am-- You forget-- I +am-- My office. Think. I am for the prosecution!" His face was livid. +Young Banks leaned heavily against the table. The color began to die +out of his lips. His hand trembled as he laid the knife upon the table. +Neither spoke. The brain of the young prosecutor found only scraps +and shreds of thought, in which such words as duty, honor, pity, +hospitality, wealth, social order, floated vaguely here and there, +buffeted by the one insistent idea that he should go--go quickly--and +leave this man alone with his shame and humiliation. + +Walter Banks was the first to speak. + +"Come up to my room. Mother might come in here and--I suppose--you have +come about-- I--Is--? You say you are for the prosecution. Have they +traced the cloak to me?" + +The lawyer stepped back again and looked at the man before him. What +could he mean by saying such a thing as that--_to him?_ They had never +been close friends, but now in spite of everything the thought that +he was the prosecutor kept itself steadily in the attorney's mind and +struggled with a pity and reluctance that were seeking to justify him by +a belief in the insanity of young Banks. + +No one but a lunatic would have made that last remark. The thought was a +relief. He grasped at it eagerly and began to fashion his mental outlook +to fit the idea. Then suddenly came to him with overwhelming force all +he had ever heard or read of the failure of justice where criminals of +high degree were concerned. + +He had followed his host to the stairs. Suddenly he turned, caught +up his hat from the stand where he had left it, and passed out of the +street door without a word. Once in the street he glanced involuntarily +up at the house. At the window of the room he had just left stood Walter +Banks. His arm was about his mother's shoulders, and both were very +pale. There was a strange likeness between them. + + + + +III. + +Every conceivable form of pressure to prevent the trial of Walter Banks +was brought to bear in the next few weeks; but Prosecutor Mathews had +pushed the case vigorously in spite of it all. He felt not only that +justice was at stake, but that his own moral fibre was in pawn, as +well. He held aloof from his social friends--who were in many cases the +friends of the accused, also--lest he lose sight of his duty through +some fresh or new form of attack upon his integrity of purpose. + +It had come to his knowledge that even the Judge who was to sit in the +case had been approached by the friends of the defendant, and it was +felt that it would be difficult to impanel a jury that would or could be +fair and impartial. + +If but one man was drawn from the "upper class," the jury would be sure +to hang. On the other hand, if all of the talesmen were chosen from that +social caste which feels that it is usually the victim, it would go hard +with Walter Banks even if he were able--as seemed wholly unlikely--to +show a reasonably clear case in his favor. + +The day came. The court-room held an unusual audience. There were many +ladies present who had never before seen the inside of such a room. They +held their breath and were filled with awe and fear--of they knew not +what. + +Perhaps few men can realize what it is to a woman to face for the first +time the embodiment of all that her strong faith and utter ignorance has +carried to mature years as an ideal of justice and dignity--of solemn +obligation and fearful responsibility. To her there has been no reverse +side to the picture. She believes in courts as courts of justice. She +knows nothing of quibble, of technicality, of precedent. Nothing here +is light or humorous to her. Next to a death chamber the criminal +court-room is fullest of the thoughts which reach beyond mere human +responsibility and import, and all that passes there is freighted for +her with a sense of finality that few men can comprehend. _They_ think +of reversal of judgment. + +The fiat of the court is the closing knell to a woman; and although she +may know the judge in private life to be a fallible or--more incongruous +still--a jovial man, his presence _here_ is overpowering. Of the jury +she feels vaguely, dread. Of the judge, awe. + +The mother of the prisoner sat near him. Her sad, pale, refined face +troubled the young prosecutor sorely and he tugged at his conscience and +spurred on his resolution after each glance at her. + +The case was so plain, the evidence so clear, the defence so weak that +the whole tide of public sentiment swung rapidly from the side of the +prisoner to that of the people. + +The indignation for him which had been felt by the society women who had +come to show themselves as his friends changed into scorn and contempt. +The whole mental atmosphere of the room underwent a revolution. When +court opened few besides the officers believed him guilty. As the +case drew near its close no one believed him innocent. He had not been +allowed by his counsel to take the stand in his own behalf, and this had +told strongly against him in the minds of both jury and spectators. The +prosecuting attorney had made a telling speech, and the charge of the +judge was plainly indicative of his opinion that there was but one +verdict to give. + +The jury had taken but one ballot. They had needed no charge from the +judge at all. + +"Guilty,"--came from the foreman's lips with a decided accent that +indicated a certain satisfaction in pronouncing it. The prisoner's face +grew a shade paler, but the puzzled light in his eyes lost nothing of +that weary, insistent questioning that had marked their depths all day. +Indeed, he seemed to be as much surprised, as the evidence had been +unfolded, as were the friends who were there to see him vindicated. + +During the speech of the prosecutor and the charge of the judge young +Banks; mother had held her son's hand and tears had dropped unheeded +from her eyes. + +The judge had spoken again, but no one moved. The attorney for the +prisoner bent forward and touched him on the shoulder. + +"Stand up for sentence," he said. "The judge"-- + +"Sit still!" It was the woman beside him who spoke. She had dried her +tears. Every face in the room was turned toward her now. She staggered +to her feet. Her voice penetrated every corner of the room. + +"_I_ am the thief, judge. Sentence me. I stole the cloak!" + +"Mother, mother! Great God, it is not true! Mother, sit down! She never +saw the coat. Mother! Mother! Great God, what does it mean?" + +The young fellow had sprung to his feet, but she eluded his grasp, and +before any one knew what she intended to do she passed onto the witness +stand. + +There was a tense silence in the room. No one was prepared for the +scene. It had been so swiftly done--so wholly without warning--that +every one sat dumb. + +She had caught up the Bible as she reached the stand and pressed it +to her lips. She was vaguely aware that this act was looked upon as +affecting the credibility of the witness. She also imagined that it gave +her a right to put in her evidence even at this stage of the trial. She +supposed that a trial was for the purpose of arriving at the facts and +that the Court sat with that object alone in view. She did not know that +it was too late. She was unaware that the case would have to be reopened +to admit her evidence. She did not know that it was possible for the +gate of justice to be swung shut in the face of truth. She supposed +that all trials were for the one purpose of getting at the bottom of the +case; so that it did not occur to her that her action was strange only +in so far as such a confession from such a woman must be so regarded by +all who knew her, and who was there in all the town who did not know and +respect her? + +The young prosecutor sat mute. The eyes of the judge widened in +astonishment. For the moment he was the man and neighbor only. He forgot +his office. She was talking rapidly, and all were listening. + +"I am the thief, judge. Let me tell you. It is not right that he should +suffer for my crime. Poor boy, his life has been a hell on earth for +_me--for me!_ And he has never understood. I could not tell him. I shall +now. He shall understand. _You_ shall, judge. Oh, God, if only a woman +sat where you do--a mother! But let me tell you; I can. I thought I +could not; but I can--even to _these_ gentlemen." She waved her hand +toward the jury and there was a widening of her nostrils as if her +breath and courage were leaving her. "Rather than have him punished, +disgraced, ruined, I can tell it all. He is _not_ guilty. It is I! It is +I!" She put her trembling hands to her temples and her eyes were those +of a hunted creature at bay. + +"Before he came into the world--you'll let me tell you frankly, judge? +_I must_. Before he came into the world I made him what he is--a thief. +Did I or did his father? It was like this. I am ashamed to tell it, but, +oh, judge, I _loved_ him, and I longed to make the pretty things and +buy the dainty ones that would make his soft, white, dimpled flesh +look sweeter when he should lie before me. His father was--you knew his +father, judge. He was a good man, but-- You know how he loved money--and +power. He-- I-- I was the pauper most young wives are. I was too proud +to ask for money, and if I _had_ asked often-- But I was too proud, so, +perhaps, I need not tell about the if. Most women know it, and-- You +could not understand." + +She paused. A panic had overtaken her nerves. She was becoming vaguely +conscious of her position. Her eyes wandered over the room; but when +they fell upon her son, sitting with his wretched face pinched and +startled, with his deep eyes staring at her, her courage came again. + +"At first I had no thought of theft. I used to go each night after my +husband fell asleep and take a little money from his pocket. Only +a little. He never missed it--never. So he used to whip the boy for +stealing afterward and said he would disgrace us and-- I never told +him even then. Life was horrible. The growing certainty maddened me. He +would steal anything, everything about the house, even his own things. +He did not understand himself and he could not help it; but I did not +think it would ever come to _this_--through me--_through me!_" + +She calmed herself again suddenly by a glance at her son. + +"Every night I took only a little money. My motive was a good one. +I knew my husband did not understand how I longed to get the pretty +things. How-- Of course in one sense I had a right to the money. He was +rich even then, but--I _felt_ myself a--pauper--and a thief. + +"I-- Do you think young mothers should be young paupers, judge? I've +sometimes thought that if they were not there might be less use for +courts like this--and prisons. + +"I've sometimes thought if mothers sat on juries they'd know the reasons +why for crime and wrong and, maybe, work to cure the causes of +the crimes rather than simply punish those who have committed them +blindly--_often blindly_. + +"I've sometimes thought the cost--in money--would be less; and then the +cost in love and sorrow! Oh, judge, be patient just a little longer. +Do not let them stop me. It means so much to _us!_ I'll go back to +the point. I'll tell the truth--all of it--all. But it is hard to do +it--here. + +"I bought the little wardrobe; but remember, judge, the months and +months of daily building, bone on bone, fibre within fibre, thought on +thought that is moulded into shape for human beings! + +"I knew your father, judge. Your eyes are like his, but all your mental +life--your temperament--you got from other blood than filled his veins. + +"Your father's mother gave you your character. Your gentle heart is +hers--your patient thoughtfulness. I knew her well. I knew your mother, +too. She was the teacher of my motherhood. It was to her I told the +truth in my boy's childhood--when I first began to realize or fear +what I had done. You owe it all to her that you are strong and true. She +understood in time--and now you sit in judgment on my boy, whose mother +learned from yours too late the meaning and the danger of it all. +She saved my other children. I killed my pride for them. _I asked +for money_. The others may be _beggars_ some day--they never will be +thieves. + +"That boy has never asked a favor. He simply cannot. His pride was +always stronger than anything--anything except his love for me. + +"I knit that in his blood too. I loved him so I made myself a thief for +him. Of course I did not know--I did not understand the awful danger +then; but-- A young mother--I--it is hard to tell it here. You will not +understand--you cannot. Oh, God, for a mother on the jury! A mother on +the bench!" + +She caught at her escaping courage again. The officer whose duty it +was to take her away moved forward a second time, and a second time the +judge motioned him back. She had been his mother's friend ever since +he could remember, and the ordinary discipline of the court was not for +her. He would do his duty, he said to himself, but surely there was no +haste. All this was irregular, of course, but if something should come +of it that gave excuse for a new trial no one would be more thankful +than he. + +"Young mothers are so ignorant. They know so little of all the things of +which they should know much. They are so helpless. Judge, there will +be criminal courts and prisons--oh, so many of both--just as long as +motherhood is ignorant and helpless and swayed by feeling only. Don't +you know it is ignorance and feeling that leads to crime? If people only +understood! If only they were able to think it out to what it means, +crimes would not be--but they cannot, they cannot! Those trembling +lips you see before you are no more truly a copy of mine--the boy is +as responsible for the set and curve of those lips--as he is for his +hopeless fault. He has stolen from his infancy; but I, not he, am the +thief. Now sentence the real criminal, judge. Courts are to punish the +guilty--not to further curse the helpless victims. I am the criminal +here. Sentence me!" + +"Mother! Mother! I never understood my-self before! Oh, mother, mother!" + +It was a wild cry from Walter Banks as his mother had risen asking for +sentence on herself. He sprang forward, forgetting everything and took +her in his arms. There was a great stir in the room. + +"Silence in the court!" + +Mrs. Banks had fainted. Her son helped to carry her into another room. +No one attempted to prevent him. The young prosecutor returned with him +and stood dumb before the court. + +"I am ready for sentence, your Honor. I committed the burglary." It was +the voice of the prisoner. He was standing with his arms folded and his +eyes cast down. Silence fell in the room. The women ceased to sob. There +was an uneasy movement in the jury box. + +"In view of the new evidence--" began the foreman but the voice of the +judge, slow and steady, filled the room. + +"It is the sentence of this court that you, Walter Banks, be confined at +hard labor in the state penitentiary for the term of four years." + +The prisoner bowed and turned a shade paler. + +"Do not tell mother that until she is better," he said to his attorney +and passed out in the custody of the sheriff. + +"And at the end of four years, what!" a lady was saying to the young +prosecutor as the room slowly emptied. + +"The brute!" was hurled after the judge by another, as his form vanished +through the door. + +"Shows that law is not for the poor alone--" + +"Good things for social order and--" + +"Well, yes, I'm rather disappointed; but of course a judge can't go +behind the returns." + +"Evidence all one way if--" + +"Heavens, what a scene!" + +"--my opinion no woman should ever be admitted to a court room except as +a prisoner. It--" + +"Feather in the cap of the prosecutor." + +"--re-election sure enough now." + +"Whole thing in a nutshell--" + +"Simple question. _Did_ he commit the burglary? If so--" + +The young prosecutor hurried away from the sound of these voices and +the congratulations of his political friends. He was mentally sore and +perplexed because he had won his case. + +That night he called upon the prisoner for the second time. + +"I have made up' my mind to resign my office," he said, not looking at +the convict, who had risen to receive him. + +Walter Banks was by far the calmer of the two, but he did not speak. + +"I shall never be able to act for the prosecution again. I thought +this case was so clear. My duty seemed so plain--too plain to admit of +anything but the most vigorous course of action; but--" + +"You did nothing but your duty, Mathews. We are all victims I +suppose--one way or another. You are going to be the victim of your +sensitive conscience. The result will be a course of vacillation that +will ruin your chances of success. I am sorry. You've got all the +elements for a leader--only you've got a conscience. That settles it. A +bit of heredity like that is as fatal as--as mine." He bit his lips. + +"Don't let your part in my case worry you. The game of life has gone +against me. That is all. The dice were loaded before I ever got hold of +them. I did what I could to out-live--out-fight my awful--inheritance. +I wasn't strong enough. It got the best of me. Nature is a terrible +antagonist. Perhaps now that I understand myself better I shall be able +to keep a firmer hold. You did your duty, Mathews; good-by. Be-- Can't +you be a little kind to mother? She suffers so. Her punishment is +double--and her crime was ignorance!" + +This time he took the hand that was held out to him. + +"Only ignorance," he added. "It seems an awful punishment for that." + +"Ignorance--and poverty and love," said the young prosecutor as the +door closed behind him, "and Nature did the rest! What a grip is at +our throats! And how we help blind Nature in her cruel work by laws and +customs and conditions! What a little way we've come from barbarism +yet! How slow we travel. But we are moving," he added with a deep sigh. +"Moving a little. There is light ahead. If not for us, then for those +who come after." + +He heard the bolt slip behind him and shuddered. + +"It might as easily have been I," he mused as he went down the steps, +and shuddered again. + +"I doubt if it was fault of his or virtue of mine that determined which +of us two should be the prosecutor." + + + + +A RUSTY LINK IN THE CHAIN. + + +_"In the brainy that wondrous world with one inhabitant, there are +recesses dim and dark, treacherous sands and dangerous shores, where +seeming sirens tempt and fade; streams that rise in unknown lands from +hidden springs, strange seas with ebb and flow of tides, resistless +billows urged by storms of flame, profound and awful depths hidden +by mist of dreams, obscure and phantom realms where vague and fearful +things are half revealed, jungles where passion's tigers crouch, and +skies of cloud and hue where fancies fly with painted wings that dazzle +and mislead; and the poor sovereign of this pictured world is led by old +desires and ancient hates, and stained by crimes of many vanished years, +and pushed by hands that long ago were dust, until he feels like some +bewildered slave that Mockery has throned and crowned."_ + +Ingersoll. + + +When I called, last Sunday afternoon, as was my habit, upon my old +college friend--now a distinguished physician--I found him sitting in +his office holding in his hand a letter. His manner was unusually grave +and, I thought, troubled. I asked him, laughingly, if he had had bad +news from beyond the seas--from his Castle in Spain. + +"No, it is worse than that, I fear," he said gravely. "It looks to +me very much like bad news from beyond the grave--from the Castle of +Heredity in the realm of an Ancestor." + +"I hope, doctor, that you have not had,--that my little jest was not a +cruel touch upon a real hurt." + +"Not at all, not at all, old fellow," he said, smiling a little. + +"It is not my own trouble at all; but--well, it set me to thinking +strange thoughts. Shall I tell you about it? I should really like +to know just how it would impress you--an intelligent man out of the +profession." + +He placed the letter on the table beside him, looked at me steadily for +a moment, and then began: + +"It may be as well to say that I have never before ventured to tell the +story of George Wetherell's curious experience, simply because I have +always felt certain that to a really intelligent and well-in-formed +physician it would be a comparatively familiar, and not specially +startling (although a wholly uncomprehended) phase of human disorder; +while to many, not of the profession, it would appear to involve such +fearful and far-reaching results, that they would either refuse to +believe it possible at all, or else jump to the conclusion that numerous +cases which have only some slight point of similarity are to be classed +with it and explained upon the same basis. + +"In regard to these latter persons, I do not intend to convey +the impression that I am either ambitious to shield them from the +consequences of their own nimble and unguarded reckonings, or that by my +silence in this particular instance I suppose that I have prevented them +from forming quite as erroneous opinions founded upon some other equally +misunderstood and ill-digested scrap of psychological and medical +information. + +"But it has sometimes seemed to me that there were certain features +connected with the case of George Wetherell which, in the hands of the +ignorant or unscrupulous, might easily be used to the disadvantage of +their fellow-beings, and I have therefore hesitated to lay it before any +one who was not, in my opinion, both intelligent and honorable enough +to accept it as one of the strange manifestations in an individual +experience; and to understand, because of the innumerable conditions of +mental and physical heredity--which were not likely ever to occur again +in the same proportions--that therefore the same manifestations were, +not to be looked for in a sufficient number of persons to ever make this +case in any sense a type or a guide. + +"Notwithstanding this, there are, as I said in the first place, certain +features connected with it which many members of the medical profession +will recognize; but they are none the less puzzling symptoms. + +"The matter has been brought back with unusual force to my mind at this +time, by a circumstance connected with one of Wetherell's children, +which is detailed in this letter. It lends a new touch of interest +to the malady of the father. To enable you to obtain even a fairly +comprehensive idea of the strange development, it will be necessary for +me to tell you, first, something about the man and his surroundings. + +"To be as brief as I may, then, he was the son of a merry, whole-souled, +stout, and, withal, mentally alert, Southern gentleman, who had taken +the law into his own hands and duly scandalized the reputable part of +the community in which he lived by giving his slaves (all of whom he or +his wife had inherited) their freedom at a time and under circumstances +which made it necessary for him to betake himself with some considerable +alacrity to a part of the country where it was looked upon as +respectable to pay for the voluntary services of one's fellowmen, rather +than to pay for the man himself with the expectation that the services +were to be thrown in. + +"Of course it was imperative--not only for the peace, but for the safety +of all parties concerned--for him to transport both his family and his +freed-men to a place where it was at once honorable for a white man +to do such a deed and for a black man to own himself. This he did; and +while a number of the negroes remained in the service of the family, the +son (on whose account, and to prevent whom from believing in and being +enervated by the possession of slaves the step had, in great measure, +been taken) had grown to manhood with a curious mingling of Southern +sympathies and Northern reasoning and convictions. + +"The outbreak of the war found the young fellow struggling bravely, with +all the fire and energy of a peculiarly gifted nature, to establish +a newspaper in a border State, and to convince his readers that the +extension of slavery would be a grave calamity, not only for the owned +but for the owner. + +"His two associates were Eastern college-bred men, and it was therefore +deemed wisest to push young Wetherell forward as the special champion +of free soil, under the illusion that his Southern birth and sympathies +would win for him a more ready and kindly hearing on a subject which +at that time was a dangerous one to handle freely, especially in the +border-land then under dispute. + +"But the three young enthusiasts had reckoned, as young people will, +upon a certain degree of reason about, and calm discussion of, a +question which at that time they still recognized as having two very +strong and serious sides; for they had not taken the stand of the +Abolition party at all. They called themselves free-soil Democrats, and +were simply arguing against the extension of an institution which they +were not yet prepared to believe it wise to attempt to abolish where +it was already established, and where there was seemingly no other +peaceable or fair solution than the one of limitation and gradual +emancipation, through the process of mental and moral development of the +ruling race. This position was not an unnatural one, surely, for young +Wetherell, and was only what might have been expected from the son of +a man who had given practical demonstration of the possibility of such +evolution in the slave-holding and slave-dependent class. + +"But, as I have intimated, the confidence and reasonableness of youth +had led to a complete misconception as to the temper of the opposition. +It is quite possible that the frank, passionate, free-soil editorials, +if they had come from either of the Eastern men, might have been +accepted as the delusions of youth, the prejudice of section, or, +at worst, as the arguments of partisans; but from a man of Southern +birth--the son of a law-breaker (you must remember that the +enfranchisement of the slaves had been a serious infraction of the law, +strange as that sounds to the ears of the present generation)--from the +son of such a man they could mean only a malicious desire to stir up +strife and cause bloodshed by making restless slaves dangerous and +dangerous slaves desperate. The result was that one night, after the +issue of a paper containing an article of unusual force and power, young +Wetherell found himself startled from a sound sleep, in the back room of +his office, by the smell of smoke and gleam of flame. + +"He understood their significance at a glance, and knew that escape by +the front door meant a reception by masked men, five minutes for prayer, +and--a rope. + +"Springing from the back window into the river, he swam to the other +shore, and within a few days raised the first regiment of volunteers +that the State sent in response to the call of the President, and cut +adrift at once and forever from all effort to argue the case from an +ethical or a financial outlook. + +"It is more than likely that anger may have had something to do with +his sudden conversion from a 'peace and argument,' to first a 'war +Democrat,' and shortly thereafter to a Republican; but be that as it +may, it is certain that at such crises as these, mental activity is +spurred and radical changes are made with a rapidity and decision +astonishing to contemplate in periods of quiet and peace. + +"So it came about that this lad of twenty-three suddenly found himself +at the head of a regiment of somewhat desperate border men, most of whom +were more than twice his own age, wildly charging a battery in one of +the first battles of the war. + +"He received three wounds, one of which was a slight abrasion of the +scalp, not looked upon as more than a scratch by either the surgeon or +himself; indeed, it would hardly be worth mentioning but for the strange +events which followed. Whether this wound had anything to do with the +condition of which I am about to tell, you will have to decide for +yourself; but I must warn you, in the beginning, that there was nothing +like a fracture of the skull, and the little path made by the bullet +through the scalp healed without trouble, almost without attention, and +never afterward gave the slightest pain. + +"The hair, it is true, did not grow again over the parting, and, as +it was nearly in the middle of his head, it made him an involuntary +follower of the fashion of a certain effeminate type of youths for whom +he had an overwhelming contempt. Neither of the other two wounds was +serious, and after a very short period in the hospital he reported for +duty, was promoted, and given sole charge of a post of considerable +importance. + +"Shortly thereafter his father received a some what discomposing +telegram. He had previously had several more or less lucid despatches +from his son while the patient was still in the hospital; but any +lack of clearness in their wording had been attributed to haste or +to carelessness in the transmission, and as they all indicated rapid +recovery, no undue anxiety had been felt. But the message in question +now produced the impression that there was something wrong. It read: +'Send me one thousand swords immediately.' + +"After a few moments' consultation with the boy's mother, Mr. Wetherell +packed his hand-bag, and, armed with a letter from President Lincoln, +whose personal friend he was, started for the seat of war. + +"Upon arriving at his destination, the son expressed no surprise +whatever, but much pleasure, at seeing his father. He asked, in the most +natural and affectionate way, about each member of the family, and then +suddenly put his hand to his head and appeared to be in deep thought. + +"His eyes contracted in the manner peculiar to some persons when +attempting to recall a long-forgotten event; but in a moment this had +passed away and he appeared to be perfectly clear and natural. + +"He attended to the affairs of his office in a manner which not only +escaped criticism, but won praise from his superiors, and conversed with +great freedom and marked intelligence on the stirring subjects of the +time. + +"He had had some little fever while his wounds were fresh, but in no +degree to cause alarm, and even this had now almost entirely left +him. In short, he appeared to be in nearly perfect mental and physical +health. There was, however, one peculiarity which the father noticed as +unfamiliar in his son; but as it was not at all strange that so young a +man--or any man, indeed, who had suddenly been given control of matters +of such grave importance--should at times be very quiet and appear to be +struggling to recall some matter of moment, the habit was not given more +than passing attention, and it was not sufficiently marked to be noticed +at all by any one except a near relation. At these times young Wetherell +would contract his eyebrows, look steadily at some object near him,--as +the toe of his boot or the palm of his hand,--raise his head suddenly, +gaze at the distant horizon, bite his lip, and then appear to either +give it up or be satisfied with some mental solution of his puzzle. + +"One day his father said: 'What is it, George?' + +"The young fellow turned his eyes quickly upon his father and asked: + +"'Have I forgotten anything? It seems to me there is something I just +fail to recall. I am on the edge of it constantly, but it slips. I can't +get quite enough hold on it to be sure what it is--or to be certain, +indeed, that it is anything. Can you think of anything I ought to do +that I have overlooked?' + +"This all sounded natural enough, and was, seemingly, a condition not +unfamiliar to his father, so they began together going over the duties +pertaining to the son's office to see if, by a mischance, something had +been neglected. Everything was complete and in perfect order; but still +the look returned from time to time, until it became almost habitual. + +"This was ten days after his father had reached camp, and his plan was +to leave for home that afternoon; for, as I said, the boy's wounds +were almost entirely healed, and he appeared to be in need of nothing +whatever. More and more his superior officers called him into their +councils, and more and more his clear judgment was commended by them. + +"He was to walk to the train with his father. The moment they were +outside the limits of the camp George remarked, casually, 'I must stop +on the way and order those swords.' + +"The remark recalled the queer telegram which had caused Mr. Wetherell +to come to his son, the wording of which had been wholly obliterated +from his mind by their meeting. + +"'What swords?' inquired his father, now on the alert again. + +"The young fellow turned and looked at his father for a moment, and then +said: 'I don't know. It is a secret order. Don't mention it. The general +told me to order them. They are to be sent to me.' + +"This all seemed probable enough to Mr. Wetherell, and yet he somehow +felt, rather than saw, a queer change in his son's eyes, which he +thought he had noticed once or twice before. + +"He decided not to return home for the present. + +"When he told his son this, the boy took it quite as a matter of course, +and made no comment whatever on the sudden alteration of purpose. + +"On the way back to camp George stepped into a military supply station +and ordered fourteen hundred swords to be delivered to him immediately. + +"By this time his father had made up his mind that there were short +intervals in which the young colonel did not know exactly what he was +doing--or, rather, that while he did know and act intelligently--from +the outlook of the moment--it was a time wholly disconnected from +the rest of his life, and when the moment was past he had no farther +recollection of it. + +"However, Mr. Wetherell was not sure enough of this to risk compromising +a probably brilliant future by a premature or unnecessarily public +announcement, and he therefore allowed the order to be made, and taken +in good faith, and walked back to camp with his son, who immediately +went about his duties in the most intelligent and scrupulously careful +manner. + +"Mr. Wetherell, however, made a call upon the officer in command the +moment he could do so without attracting attention; and after a long +talk (in which the secret sword order was discovered to be a delusion), +it was decided that the recently recovered invalid should retire +from the field on the sick leave, which he had previously refused to +consider. + +"When he was told of this arrangement, he agreed to it without a murmur, +and began, for the first time for many days, to have his wounds (which +were now past the need of it) dressed with much care. This he continued +every morning, but by the time they reached home he had become possessed +with the belief that his chief wound was in his side, where there had +not been a scratch. + +"To humor him, the family physician applied bandages to the imaginary +injury every day regularly. + +"All this time there was no clearer talker, no more acute reasoner, no +more simple, earnest, gentlemanly fellow to be found than Col. George +Wetherell, whom his townsmen were honoring and inducing to make public +speeches and write clear, firm, inspiring editorials for one of the +leading papers. No one except his own family and physician suspected for +a moment that he was not mentally as bright as he always had been, and +even the younger members of the family were without the least hint of +it. + +"Indeed, his father and the doctor both thought that his only illusion +now was a belief in the wound in his side. Several weeks passed, and +even this indication was losing its force, for he no longer required +medical attention, and was as well and as rational as ever in his life, +so far as any one could perceive, when one day a stranger appeared and +asked for him. Mr. Wetherell requested the gentleman (who was evidently +laboring under great excitement) to be seated, and at the same time made +up his own mind to be present during the interview. + +"Colonel Wetherell was summoned, and, on entering the room, looked in +a startled way at the stranger, smiled vaguely, extended his hand, +contracted his eyes into a long, narrow line, turned white, and throwing +both arms suddenly above his head, exclaimed: 'My God! my God! what have +I done? Where am I? How long has it been? Is she dead? Is she dead?' and +staggered back into his father's arms. + +"His distress was so manifest, that the visitor lost his severity at +once, and said quite gently: 'No, she is not dead; but she is almost +insane with fright, and has been so exhausted with anxiety and tears, +that we had lost all hope for her reason, or even for her life, unless +I could find you. I have been through the lines, was delayed by the loss +of my passport, and it is now five weeks since I saw her. She is alive, +but--' + +"Young Wetherell sprang to his feet, and turned on his father like +a madman. 'How dared you?' he demanded; 'how dared you keep back my +letters? You have killed her. You have murdered her, poor, delicate +girl, with anxiety and doubt of me.' And then with set teeth and white +lips he advanced upon his father, his arm uplifted, as if he held a +sword, and with a sweep which would have severed chords of steel, if the +weapon had really been within his grasp, he brought his arm across his +father's breast and sank upon the floor, senseless and still. + +"Afterward, when he revived, he had no recollection of what had +occurred, except alone the fact that for many weeks previous he had +forgotten utterly the girl who was to be his wife, whose life and +love were all his world. While he had remembered everything else, had +carefully attended to the smallest details of daily life, the link of +memory that held the fact of her existence had been coated with a rust +of absolute oblivion. The single link in all the chain of memory that +had failed him had been the one the nearest to his heart--the dearest +one of all! + +"They were married two months later, and he resumed command of his +regiment. Through an honorable and eventful life no sign of mental lapse +ever returned; but every day he dreaded it, and watched his wife and +children as a man might do who saw a creeping monster back of those he +loved while he stood paralyzed and dumb. He never seemed to fear that +other things might lose their hold upon his consciousness; but the +apprehension that his mind would slip the link which held his wife, and +leave her sick and faint with anxious fears, which he alone could still, +constantly haunted him. + +"His wounds never troubled him again. He died not long ago. His career +was an exceptionally brilliant one. You would know him if I had given +his real name, for it was in the public ear for years. + +"There were but six persons who ever knew the history of his case, and +they are still unable to explain it--its cause, its direction, its cure. +Or is it cured? Will his children be subject to it? Will it take the +same form? Was it caused by the wound? by the fever? Or were hereditary +conditions so grouped as to produce this mental effect, even if there +had been no wound--no illness? If the latter, will it be transmitted? +These questions come to me with renewed force, to-day, as I hold in my +hand this letter, asking me to give the family history of Col. George +Wetherell for the use of physicians in a distant city who are now +treating his son. This son has reached the precise age at which his +father had the strange experience of which I have just told you. + +"There is a hint in the letter which, in the light of the father's +malady, appears to a physician to be of peculiar importance from a +medical outlook. + +"We shall see, we shall see." + +There was a long pause; then he asked: "Should you, a layman, look +to the wound to explain the condition? Or to the Castle of Heredity? +Suppose the son's malady is quite similar--as now appears--what then?" + + + + +THE BOLER HOUSE MYSTERY. + +_"What would you do? what would you say now, if you were in such a +position?"_--Thackeray. + +_"Thackeray is always protesting that no good is to be done by +blinking the truth. Let us have facts out, and mend what is bad if we +can"_--Trollope. + + +Mr. John Boler had been in the hotel business, as he phrased it, ever +since he was born. Before he could walk he had been the "feature" of his +father's summer hotel, where he was the only baby to be passed around +and hugged into semi-unconsciousness by all the women in the house. +Because of the scarcity of his kind, too, he was subjected to untold +agony by the male guests, most of whom appeared to believe that the +chief desire of his infantile heart was to be tossed skyward from hour +to hour and caught in upstretched hands as he descended with a sickening +sense of insecurity and a wild hysterical laugh. In these later years he +often said that he would like to know who those summer fiends were who +had made his infancy so full of narrow escapes from sudden and violent +death. Finally he thought he had revenge at hand. A benevolent-looking +old gentleman came puffing up to the desk of the Boler House, and, +after registering, proceeded to question the genial proprietor as to his +identity. + +"Dear me, dear me," he puffed, "and so you are the son of old John +Boler, the best hotel-keeper the sun ever shone upon! Why, I remember +tossing you up to the rafters under the porch of your father's house +when you were only the size of a baked apple and mighty nigh as measly +looking. Well, well, to be sure you had grit for a young one. Never got +scared. Always yelled for more. I believe if you had batted your soft +little head against the roof you'd have laughed all the louder and +kicked until you did it again," and the old man chuckled with the +pleasure of age and retrospection. + +"Yes, I remember well," said Mr. Boler, casting about in his own mind +for the form of revenge he should take on this man now that he was to +have the chance for which he had so longed and waited. + +His first thought was to put him in the room next to the three sporting +men who played poker and told questionable stories of their own exploits +after two o'clock every night, but that hardly seemed adequate. The +room adjoining the elevator popped into his head. Every time the old +gentleman fell asleep _bang_ would go that elevator door or _bzzzz_ +would start off the bell so suddenly that it would leave him unnerved +and frantic in the morning. But what was that? What John Boler yearned +for was to make the punishment fit the crime, and, after all these years +of planning and wishing for the chance, here it was, and he felt that he +could think of nothing, absolutely nothing, bad enough. + +So with a fine satire which was wholly lost upon his victim, Mr. Boler +ordered him taken to the very best room in the house, and made up his +mind that after disarming all suspicion in that way he would set about +his revenge, which should take some exquisitely torturous form. + +All this had run through his mind with great rapidity while the old +gentleman talked. Then Mr. Boler turned the register around, wrote "98" +opposite the name. Said he should be delighted to show his own mettle to +one of his father's old guests, called out "Front," and transferred his +attention to a sweet-faced girl who stood waiting her turn to register. + +"A small room, please," she said in a voice scarcely above a whisper. +Mr. Boler knew just what it meant in an instant. He knew that she was +not used to hotels--that she was uncertain what to do, and that she +wanted her living to cost her as little as possible. She was evidently a +lady, and quite as evidently from some small town. + +"Front," he called again. "Show this lady to 96. Step lively." Front +grinned. Ninety-six was a mere closet with no window except one facing a +dark shaft. Indeed, it had once been the dressing-room and clothes press +for the adjoining suite, and so far as Front could remember had never +been used as a sleeping apartment by any one except the valet of a +certain French gentleman who once occupied 98. + +"Took my revenge on the wrong person that time," mused Mr. Boler as he +saw the lady enter the elevator. "Now I wonder why I did that?" But Mr. +John Boler had his little superstition, as most of us have, and whenever +he was moved by a perfectly blind impulse to do a thing, he always +believed that "something would come of it sure," as he expressed it. +"Never knew it to fail. Of course I don't believe in such things; but--" +and then he would laugh and go on believing in it as implicitly as ever. + +All day he brooded over what he should do to old Winkle, as he called +the man in 98, and as surely as his mind grew exhausted and his various +plans fell through, his thoughts would catch a glimpse of the timid +girl in the next room, and he would smilingly wink to himself and say, +"Something will come of it, something will come of it sure. Never put a +guest in that beastly room before, and I had nothing against _her. Must_ +have been him It was after." He always called his blind impulses "It" +when he was utilizing them for superstitious purposes or to quiet his +reason. + +"I'll bet that girl being in that closet will be the means of getting +me even with old Winkle yet, and she is not used to city hotels. She'll +think that it is all right and she will most likely be out all day. It's +not so bad to sleep in after all. Quietest room in the house." + +The next morning Mr. Winkle strolled into the office and harassed Mr. +Boler about his infancy, reminding him that he had possessed a very weak +stomach. "And who wouldn't," thought that gentleman indignantly, "if he +was pitched about like a bale of hay from morning till night by every +fool that got hold of him?" but he smiled pleasantly and said no doubt +he had been very much like other infants, judging from the way he grew +up. He looked upon a baby as the embryonic man, and as he was about an +average adult male biped now, he had most likely been very close to an +average male infant. "I might have been more," he hinted darkly, "but +for certain idiotic people," and then he laughed. For it was not in Mr. +John Boler's nature to be openly unpleasant to any one. This was the +secret of his success as an innkeeper. + +"By the way, Johnnie," said old Mr. Winkle late the next afternoon, "I +thought I heard some one sobbing in the room next to mine last night. +This morning I concluded I was mistaken, but now I'm sure I heard it. +Anybody sick in there? I tried the door that leads into my room but it +was locked. It sounds like a woman's voice. It always did tear the very +heart out of me to hear a woman cry--" He went on talking but Mr. John +Boler heard no more. His heart gave a wild bound of delight. "It" had +given him his revenge. He would let the young woman stay in the hotel +free of charge as long as old Winkle was in the house if only she would +weep and sob pretty steadily. "'Johnnie,' by gad," thought he, resenting +this new indignity to his name. "By George, what luck!" And then he went +about his duties with a new spring in his always elastic step. At the +lunch hour the following day he glanced into the dining-room, and sure +enough, there sat the occupant of 96, and her eyes were swollen and red. +At almost any other time this would have disturbed John Boler, but now +it was a deep delight to him. + +"Had a spat with her lover, no doubt," speculated he, "and, by Jove! it +came at a lucky time for me. I'd pay her lover to keep up the row for +three weeks if I could get at him. 'Weak stomach,' 'Johnnie,' indeed!" +And he went back to the office rubbing his hands in a satisfied way, +thinking that old Winkle would be afraid to go to his room that night, +and that his sleep would be broken by visions of a weeping woman next +door, even if she did not keep him awake half the time sobbing because +Ralph had called her a mean thing or a proud stuck-up flirt, and hinted +darkly that she was in love with his rival. + +Matters had gone on in this way for nearly a week and Mr. Winkle had +fretted and fumed and asked for another room two or three times, but +Mr. Boler told him that the house was full and that there wasn't another +room fit to offer him anyhow. He said that he would change the young +lady's room as soon as he could, but he expected her to leave every day. +She went out a good deal and wrote a large number of letters, and +he felt sure she was going to remain only a day or two longer. He +apologized and explained and planned, and then he would chuckle to +himself the moment "old Winkle's" back was turned to think how "_It_" +had succeeded in getting him even with the old reprobate without the +least overt act on his part. + +But the eighth morning Mr. Winkle rebelled outright. He said that he +would wring the girl's worthless neck if he could get at her, but he +could not and would not bear her sobs any longer. The night before they +had been worse than ever and he had not slept a wink all night long. At +last Mr. Boler promised that he would transfer the girl to another room +that very afternoon if she did not leave, and the old man softened at +once and said if she could not afford to pay for any other room he would +pay the difference and she need never know it. + +John Boler was not mercenary, but this offer gave him keen delight. +For "old Winkle" would have to buy his relief after all. He thought how +willingly a certain infant of his memory would have paid for rest +and quiet too when it was helpless clay in the hands of certain old +imbeciles he knew of. + +At 2 p.m. he told Front to go up to 96 and tell the young lady that he +now had a better room for her that would cost her no more than the one +she now occupied, and to change her and her belongings to 342 forthwith. +In five minutes Front came back as white as a cloth and said that the +young lady's door was unlocked, that there were a number of letters on +the table and that she was dead. + +Mr. John Boler dashed from behind the desk across the street and was +back in an incredibly short space of time, dragging behind him the +dignified and wealthy physician whose office faced the hotel. + +At this stage of the proceedings he cautioned the employees not to say +a word about the matter on pain of instant dismissal. They one and all +promised, and then proceeded to tell the first reporter who dropped in +that a young lady had committed suicide upstairs and that she had +cried out loud for a week. They gave a full description of her and her +effects, all of which appeared in the 5 o'clock edition of the paper, +duly headlined with her name and certain gratuitous speculations in +regard to her motive for self-destruction. In these it was darkly hinted +that she was no better than she should be, but now that she was dead +"we" (the immaculate young gentlemen of the press) felt disposed to draw +a veil of charity over her past and say with the law that her suicide +proved her insanity, and that her mental condition might also account +for her past frailties. + +While these generous young gentlemen were penning their reports the +doctor and Mr. John Boler worked over the poor helpless body of the +unconscious girl in the dark little room upstairs. Between times they +read the letters on the table and learned the old, old story--not of +crime, but of misfortune. No work had offered, and she must work or +starve--or sell the only value she possessed in the sight of men. One or +two of the answers to her advertisement had boldly hinted at this, +and when her little stock of money had run out and the little stock of +misfortune had swelled into a mountain, and the little pile of insults +had increased until she felt that she could endure life no longer, she +had concluded to brave another world where she was taught to believe a +loving Father awaited her because she had been good and true and pure to +the last in spite of storms and disappointments and temptations. So she +made the wild leap in the dark, confident that the hereafter could +hold nothing worse, and believing sincerely that it must hold +something better for Her and her kind, even if that better were only +forgetfulness. + +Up to this point her story was that of thousands of helpless girls who +face the unknown dangers of a great city with the confidence of youth, +and that ill training and ignorance of the world which is supposed to be +a part of the charm of young womanhood. She had not registered her real +name, it is true; but this was because she intended to advertise for +work and have the replies sent to the hotel, and somehow she thought +that it would be easier for her to do that over a name less sacred to +her than her mother's, which was also her own. So instead of registering +as Fannie Ellis Worth of Atlanta, she had written "Miss Kate Jarvis" and +had given no address whatever. This latter fact told strongly against +her with the reporters. They located her in a certain house on +Thirty-first Street and "interviewed" the madam, who gave them a picture +of a girl who had once been there, and a cut of this picture appeared +in two of the morning papers with the fuller account of the suicide. A +beautiful moral was appended to this history of the girl's life +"which had now come to its appropriate ending." But when one of these +enterprising young gentlemen of the press called to get the details of +the funeral for his paper, he was shocked to learn that the young lady +was not dead after all, and that she was now in a fair way to recover. +He was still further disgusted when neither Mr. Boler nor the attending +physician would submit to an interview and declined to allow him to send +his card to the girl's room. + +Then and there he made up his mind that if he had to rewrite that +two-column report to fit the new developments in the case, he would, as +he expressed it, make John Boler and pompous Dr. Ralston wish that they +had never been bom. Incident to this undertaking, he would darkly hint +at a number of things in regard to the girl herself and their relations +with her. This was not at all to make her wish that she had never been +born; but if it should serve that purpose, the young gentleman did not +feel that he would be in the least to blame--if, indeed, he gave the +matter a thought at all, which he very likely did not. + +The article he wrote was certainly very "wide awake" and surprised even +himself in its ingenuity of conjecture as to the motive which could +prompt two such men as John Boler, proprietor of the Boler House, and +Dr. Ralston, "whose reputation had heretofore been above suspicion, to +place themselves in so unenviable, not to say dangerous, a position." +He suggested that although the young woman had taken her case out of +the jurisdiction of the coroner by not actually dying, this fact did +not relieve the affair of certain features which demanded the prompt +attention of the police court. The matter was perfectly clear. Here was +a young woman who had attempted to relieve herself, by rapid means, of +the life which all the social and financial conditions which surrounded +her had combined to take by a slower and more painful process. If she +had succeeded, the law held that she was of unsound mind--that she was, +in short, a lunatic--and treated her case accordingly; but, on the other +hand, if she failed, or if, as in this instance, her effort to place +herself beyond want and pain was thwarted by others, then the law was +equally sure that she was _not_ a lunatic at all, but that she was a +criminal, and that it was the plain duty of the police judge to see +that she was put with those of her class--the enemies and outcasts of +society. + +It was also quite clear that any one who aided, abetted, or shielded a +criminal was _particeps criminis,_ and that unless Mr. John Boler and +Dr. Ralston turned the young offender over to the police at once, there +was a virtuous young reporter on the _Daily Screamer_ who intended to +know the reason why. + +It was this article in the _Screamer_ which first made Mr. Winkle aware +of the condition of affairs in the room adjoining his own. He had been +absent from the hotel for some hours, and had, therefore, known nothing +of the sad happenings so near him. He dashed down into the office with +the paper in his hand and asked for Mr. Boler; but that gentleman was +not visible. It was said that he was in consultation with Dr. Ralston +at the office of the latter, whereupon Mr. Winkle re-read the entire +article aloud to the imperturbable clerk and expressed himself as under +the impression that something was the matter with the law, or else that +a certain reporter for the _Screamer_ was the most dangerous lunatic +at present outside of the legislature. The clerk smiled. A young man +leaning against the desk made a note on a tablet, and then asked Mr. +Winkle what he knew of the case and to state his objections to the law, +first saying _which_ law he so vigorously disapproved. The clerk winked +at Mr. Winkle, but Mr. Winkle either did not see, or else did not regard +the purport of the demonstration, and proceeded to express himself with +a good deal of emphasis in regard to a condition of affairs which made +it possible to elect as lawmakers men capable of framing such idiotic +measures and employing on newspapers others who upheld the enactment. +But before he had gone far in these strictures on public affairs as now +administered he espied John Boler and followed him hastily upstairs. + +That afternoon Mr. Winkle almost fell from his chair when he saw the +evening edition of the _Screamer_ with a three-column "interview" with +himself. It was headed, "_Rank Socialism at the Boler House. A Close +Friend of the Offending Landlord Lets the Cat out of the Bag. A +Dangerous Nest of Law Breakers. John Boler and Dr. Ralston still +Defiant. Backed by a Man Who Ought to Know Better. Shameless Confession +of one of the Arch Conspirators. The Mask torn from Old Silas Winkle Who +Roomed Next to the Would-be Suicide. Will the Police Act Now?_" + +When Mr. Winkle read the article appended to these startling headlines, +he descended hastily to the office floor and proceeded to make some +remarks which it would be safe to assert would not be repeated by any +Sunday-school superintendent--in the presence of his class--in the +confines of the State of New York. John Boler was present at the time +and whispered aside to Mr. Winkle that a reporter for the _Screamer_ and +five others from as many different papers were within hearing, +whereupon Mr. Winkle became more and more excited, and talked with great +volubility to each and every one of the young men as they gathered about +him. "_Adds Blasphemy to His Other Crimes_," wrote one of them as his +headline, and then John Boler interfered. + +"Look here, boys," said he pleasantly, but with a ring of determination +in his voice, "you just let Mr. Winkle alone. This sort of thing is all +new to him, and he had no more to do with that girl than if his room +had been in Texas." (The reporters winked at each other and one of them +wrote, _Connived at by the Proprietor_.) "I put her in the room next to +his. _I_ helped the doctor to resuscitate her. _I_ positively refuse to +give you her real name and present address, although I know both, and +Mr. Winkle does not, and if the police court has any use for me it knows +where to find me. Have a cigar?" Each reporter took a weed, and three of +them went to the office of Dr. Ralston to complete their records as soon +as possible. + +"I'm sorry all this has happened to you in my house, Mr. Winkle," said +John Boler, as they stood alone for a moment. "It is partly my fault, +too," he added, in a sudden burst of contrition. "It" had carried his +revenge further than he had intended. He knew how the old man's sudden +outbreak of righteous indignation would go against him in the newspaper +reports that would follow, and John Boler was kind-hearted as well as +fearless. + +"Good Lord, don't you worry about me, Johnnie!" said the old man, +craning his neck to watch the retreating forms from the window. "But +those young devils have gone over to the doctor's office and they'll +bully him into telling where the girl is, and then they'll bully the +police into dragging her into court yet. Dear me, dear me!" + +"Now, don't you be scared about that, Mr. Winkle. The doctor and I have +made up our minds to fight this thing out. We've found out all about the +girl and that it was simply a case of utter despair. It was a question +of death by slow or by quick means. Society, law, prescribed the slow +method, and the girl herself chose the rapid one. Well, now, as long as +she was to be the sufferer in either case, it strikes me that she had +about as good a right to a voice in the matter as the rest of us. Dr. +Ralston and I checkmated her. (I can't afford to have that kind of thing +happen in the hotel, of course.) But, by gad, we're not going to let +them make a criminal of her. All the circumstances combined to do that +before and she chose death. Well, we stopped her efforts in that line +too, and now the court proposes to put the finishing touches on +society's other inhumanities and send her up for it. Why, good God, man, +just look at it! In substance that girl said, 'I'll die before I'll be +forced into association with criminals,' and the court says, 'You shall +do nothing of the kind. Science shall doctor you up and we will _send_ +you up. Despair is a crime.' That girl tried every way she knew of to +live right. She failed. No work that she could do came her way. Well, +now, will you just tell me what she was to do? You know what any man on +God's earth would do if _he_ had been situated that way and _could_ have +sold his virtue--in the sense we use virtue for women. Well, some women +are not built that way. They prefer to die. Life don't mean enough of +happiness to them to pay for the rest of it--life as it is, I mean. +Well, since women don't have anything to say about what the laws and +social conditions shall be, it strikes me that the situation is a trifle +arbitrary, to put it mildly. We make laws for and demands upon women +that no man on earth would think of complying with, and then we tell 'em +they sha'n't even die to get away from the conditions we impose and +about which they are not allowed a word to say. To tell you the bald +truth _I'm_ ashamed of it. So when we learned that girl's story we just +made up our minds that since we had taken the liberty to keep her from +getting out of the world by a shorter cut than the one usually +prescribed in such cases--starvation--that we'd just take the additional +liberty of keeping her from being hounded to insanity and made a +criminal of by legal verdict." + +Mr. Winkle gave a snort that startled John Boler, for he had been +running on half to himself during the last of his talk and had almost +forgotten that the old man was present. When he heard the explosion he +mistook its meaning and his conscience gave him another smart twinge. + +"Yes, I'm sorry, _very_ sorry, Mr. Winkle, that this trouble has come to +you in my house, but who could have foreseen that--a--that is to say--" + +"Trouble to _me?_" exclaimed Mr. Winkle. "Trouble to _me?_ Who's said +anything about any trouble to me? Do you suppose I care what those young +scamps say about me in the papers? Got to make a living, haven't they? +Well, society doesn't object to their making a living by taking what +does not belong to 'em, if it happens to be a man's reputation or a +woman's chance to ever make an honest living again. Little thefts like +that don't count That is not a crime; but dear me, Johnnie, do you +suppose I care a tinker's dam about that, so for as _I_ go? God bless my +soul, if the dear boys can sell their three columns of rot about me, and +it will keep them off the heels of some poor devil that it might ruin, +why, I'm satisfied. All I've got to say to you is, if they arrest +you I'll go bail, and if they fine you I'll pay it, and if they jail +you--hang it, Johnnie, I'll serve your term, that's all." + +Mr. Boler laughed. "My punishment shall all be vicarious then, hey? Good +idea, only it won't work in every-day life. The law doesn't let other +people serve out your term. But I'm just as much obliged, and--and--to +tell you the truth, Mr. Winkle, I'm--that is to say, I hope you will +forgive me--the fact is, I forgive you freely for the part you took in +helping to addle such brains as I had when I was a child. There is my +hand. 'It' went a little too far this time, and--" + +Mr. Winkle took off his glasses and polished them carefully. Then he +placed them astride his nose and gazed thoughtfully at his old friend's +son for fully a minute before he said a word. Finally he took the +extended hand, shook it solemnly, and walked slowly away, wondering to +himself if it could be possible that hard-headed old John Boler's son +was touched a little in the brain. Mr. Boler noticed his perplexed +expression and laughed merrily to himself as he started toward the +elevator. Before he reached it he turned and beckoned to Mr. Winkle to +follow him. On the third floor they were joined by Dr. Ralston. + +"She is so much better now, Mr. Winkle," explained the genial hotel man, +"and you are an older man than either the doctor or I, so I thought-- It +just struck me that she might feel-- That you might like-- Oh, damn it, +would you like to go up to see her? We are going now. A clergyman has +called, and if she wants to see him we shall not stay but a minute; but +as there is no woman about, as she is so alone, I thought perhaps she +might like to have an older man come with us, for she seems to be a very +sensitive girl. She has been silent about herself so far; but she is +better now, and we want to find out what work she can do, and have a +place ready for her when she is able to get about. Perhaps she will talk +more freely to you." + +The old gentleman looked perplexed, but made no reply until they +were out of the elevator. Then he took Mr. Boler by the arm and said +helplessly, "I--I am a bachelor, you know, Johnnie, and--" + +"No!" laughed Mr. Boler. "Well, confound it, you don't look it. Anybody +would take you for the proud father of a large brood. She will think you +are and it may help her. Come on." + +The old gentleman entered the darkened room last and sat down silently +in the deepest shadow. The doctor stepped to the bed and spoke in a low +tone. A white face on the pillow turned slowly, so that the only band of +light that reached in from the open door fell full upon it. Mr. Winkle +shuddered as he saw for the first time the delicate, pallid, hopeless +face. + +"A priest?" she said feebly, in answer to the doctor. "Oh, no. Why +should I want to see a priest? You've had your way. You've brought me +back to battle with a world wherein I only now acknowledged my defeat." +Her voice trembled with weakness and emotion, but she was looking +steadily at the doctor with great wide eyes, in which there burnt the +intensity of mental suffering and a determination to free her mind even +at the risk of losing the good-will of those who had intended to be kind +to her. "A priest! What could he do? _This_ life is what I fear. His +mission is to deal with other worlds--of which I know already what he +does--and that is _nothing_. Of this life I know, alas! too much. Far +more than he. He cannot help me, for I could tell him much he _cannot_ +know, of suffering and fortitude and hope laid low at last, without a +refuge even in cloistered walls. I know what he would say. His voice +would tremble and he would offer sympathy and good advice--and, maybe, +alms. These are not what I want or need. I am not very old--just +twenty-two--but I have thought and thought until my brain is tired, and +what good could it do for him to sit beside me here and say in gentle +tones that it is very sad? No doubt that he would tell me, too, how +wicked I have been that I should choose to die by my own hand when life +had failed me." + +She smiled a little, and her wan face lit from within was beautiful +still in spite of its pallor. The doctor murmured something about +natural sympathy, and Mr. Boler remarked that men who were fortunate +would gladly help those who were in distress if only they knew in time. +She did not appear to heed them, but presently went on as though her +mind were on the clergymen below waiting to see her. + +"To feel that it is sad is only human; but what is to be done? That is +the question now. What is to be done for suffering in _this_ world? It +is life that is hard to bear, not death. Sympathy with the unfortunate +is good. Kind words and gentle tones as your priest recounts their woes +are touching. Yes, and when they are drawn to fit the truth would melt +a heart of stone; but unless action wings the sympathy and dries the +tears, the object of his tenderness is in no wise bettered--indeed, is +injured. Why? Because he lulls to sleep man's conscience and thereby +gives relief from pangs that otherwise had found an outlet through an +open purse. And when I say an open purse I do not speak of charity, that +double blight which kills the self-respect in its recipient and numbs +the conscience of the 'benevolent' man who grasps the utmost penny +_here_ that he may give with ostentation _there_, wounding the many that +he may heal the few. All this was safe enough, no doubt, while Poverty +was ignorant, for ignorance is helpless always; but now--" There was +a pause. She raised her head a little from the pillow and a frightened +look crept into her eyes--"but now the poor are not so ignorant that +it will long be safe to play at cross purposes with suffering made too +intelligent to drink in patient faith the bitter draughts of life and +wait the crown of gold he promises hereafter--and wears, meanwhile, +himself. A _little_ joy on earth, they think, will not bedim the lustre +of a life that is to come--if such there be. You see I've thought a +little in these wretched days and months just past." She was silent +again for a moment. A bitter smile crossed her face and vanished. The +doctor offered her a powder which she swallowed without a word. John +Boler stepped to the table and poured out a glass of wine, but when he +held it toward her she shook her head and closed her eyes a moment. Then +she spoke again as if no break had checked her thought. "Oh, no; I +do not care to see your priest. The poor no longer fail to note his +willingness to risk the needle's eye with camel's back piled high with +worldly gain. If he may enter thus, why may not they with simpler train +and fewer trappings? The poor are asking this to-day of prince and +priest alike. No answer comes from either. Evasion does not satisfy. +I ask, but no one answers. The day once was when silence passed for +wisdom. That day is gone. To-day we are asking why? and why? and why? no +longer, when? And so the old reply, 'hereafter,' does not fit the query. +Why, not when, is what we urge to-day, and your replies must change to +fit the newer, nearer question. When I say _your_ replies, I do not mean +you, doctor, nor your friend. You two meant kindly by me. Yes, I know. +I am not claiming that you are at fault, nor they--the fortunate--the +prince and priest. I understand. Blind nature took her course and trod +beneath her cruel feet the millions who were born too weak to struggle +with the foes they found within themselves and in their stronger +brothers. I know, I know." + +She lay back on the pillow and closed her eyes wearily. Mr. Winkle drew +near and stood behind the doctor's chair, still keeping in the shadow, +but watching her pale face with an intensity born of a simple nature +easy to stir and quick to resolve. The doctor touched her pulse with a +light finger and gravely nodded his head as he glanced at his watch. Her +heavy eyelids did not lift but her voice broke the silence again. There +was a cadence in it that gave a solemn thrill to the three men as they +listened, the doctor watching with professional interest the effect of +the powder he had given; the other two waited, expecting they knew not +what. + +"The ignorance and cruelty of all the past, the superstitious fears, +the cunning prophecies, the greeds and needs of men, joined hands and +marched triumphant. They did not halt to ask the fallen what had borne +them down. They did not silence bugle blasts of joy where new-made +graves were thick. No silken flag was lowered to warm to life the +shivering forms of comrades overcome and fallen by the way. The strong +marched on and called themselves the brave. Sometimes they were. But +other times the bravest had gone down, plucked at, perchance, by wife or +child or friend whose sorrow or distress reached out and twined itself +about the strong but tender heart and held it back until the foot lost +step, and in the end the eye lost sight of those who only now had kept +him company." + +She lifted her small white hand and pointed as if to a distant +battlefield, but her eyes remained closed. The doctor glanced uneasily +at his watch and took her other wrist in his fingers again. + +"The next battalion trampled him. The priest bent low and whispered +'over there, hereafter,' and slipped the treasure of the fallen hero +beneath his ample robe to swell the coffers of the church, since dead +men need no treasures." + +Her voice was infinitely sad but she laughed a little and opened +her eyes. They fixed themselves upon the silvered head of Mr. Winkle +standing behind the doctor's chair. + +"Perhaps I shock you. I do not mean to, but I have thought and thought +these last few wretched months, and looking at the battlefields of life +backward through all the ages, I thought I saw at night, in camp, the +priest and conqueror meet beside the campfire and council for the next +day's march. I thought I heard the monarch say, 'I go before and cleave +my way. You follow me and gather up two things--the spoils I miss and +all the arrows of awakened scorn and wrath embedded in the breasts of +those of our own ranks who fall or are borne down, lest they arise and +overtake us while we sleep and venge themselves on us. Tell them to +wait. Their time will come. Tell them _I_ clear the way for them, and +_you_ forgive a hatred which you see is growing up within their wicked +breasts. Quiet, soothe, and shame them into peace. Assure them that +_hereafter_ they, not we, shall have the better part. Gain time. +Lay blame to me if need be; but always counsel patience, waiting, +acquiescence, peace, submission to the will of God--_your will and +mine_. Your task is easy. No danger lies therein. I take the risk and +share with you the glory and the gain.' I heard the priest disclaim all +greed of gain and go to do his part as loyal subject and as holy man. +I saw all this and more before I took the last resolve you balked. You +meant it kindly, doctor, yes, I know, but I am very tired and what is +there ahead for me, or such as I, on battlefields like these?" + +No one ventured a reply. She closed her eyes and waited. The doctor took +another powder from his case and held it above her lips. She smiled and +swallowed it. + +"We take our powders very docilely," she said, with a bitter little +laugh as the wine-glass left her hand and Mr. Boler's finger touched her +own. He noticed that hers was very cold. + +"They used to make us sleep in the good old days of priest and monarch, +but our nerves are wrong just now. Our powders only make us think the +more and have strange visions." + +Dr. Ralston glanced at Mr. Boler and nodded his head mysteriously. The +powder was beginning to work, he thought, for she had reverted to the +old vision, and talked as if she were in a dream. "That way it was, +another way it is, and still another will be," she was saying. "To-day +the honest poor, the hampered weak, are defeated, dazed, and some of us +are hopeless. Others there are who cling to hope and life and brood on +vengeance. That is your danger, gentlemen, for days that are to come. +You will have to change your powders. The old prescriptions do not make +us sleep. We think, and think, and think. We strain our nerves and break +our hearts, for what? A life as cold and colorless and sad as death +itself--to some of us far sadder--and yet you will not even let us die. +Again we ask you, why? There is no place on earth for such as we, unless +we will be criminals. That is the hinge whereon the future turns. How +many will prefer the crime to want? What dangers lie behind the door +that now is swinging open? Intelligence has taught us scorn for such +a grovelling lot, has multiplied our needs, and turned the knife of +suffering in quivering wounds no longer deadened by the anaesthetics of +ignorant content with life or superstitious fear of death. The door is +swinging on the hinge. The future has to face creatures the past has +made like demons. Some, like myself, behind the door, who do not love +mere life, will turn the sharpened dagger on themselves. But there are +others--" + +Her voice sank. The three men thought that she had fallen asleep at +last. The doctor drew a long satisfied breath and consulted his watch +for the fourth time, making a mental note for future use in giving the +drug whose action he was watching. He started and frowned, therefore, +when her voice broke the silence again. + +"Others there are, in spite of pain and anguish, in spite of woe and +fear, who cling to life--who read in eyes they worship the pangs of +hunger, cold, and mental agony. Where will their vengeance go? Who +knows?" + +She opened her great eyes and looked first at one and then at another, +and repeated, "Who knows?" + +Again there was no reply. After a long pause Mr. Winkle said gently: + +"There is a place in life for girls like you. I shall charge myself +with it. You shall find work and joy yet, my child. Now go to sleep. Be +quiet. We have let you talk too long. Stop thinking sadly now. You think +too much. You _think_ too much." + +She closed her eyes quickly and there was a tightening of the lips that +left them paler than before. Then a tear rolled slowly down her temple. +Before it reached the pillow the doctor bent forward and dried it softly +with his silk handkerchief. She opened her eyes wide at the touch. "'Be +quiet?'" she repeated, "'stop thinking?' Oh, yes; _I_ will be quiet, but +the rest, the others? Those with whom you do not charge yourself, who +find no work, no joy? Will _they_ be quiet, will they stop thinking? Oh, +yes; I can be quiet, very quiet, but the rest, the rest? The others who +think too much--_all, all?_" + +There was a wild look in her dry eyes. The doctor touched her wrist +again and said softly to the men beside him, "It is working now. She +will sleep. But the shock of all her trouble has left her mind unhinged, +poor child. 'The rest? the others?' _We_ cannot care for all the +countless poor. Her brain is surely touched, poor child, poor child. How +can we tell whether the others will stop thinking, or how, or when? Her +mind was wandering, and now she sleeps, poor child. Come out. She is +best alone." + +They closed the door gently behind them and stood a moment in awkward +silence outside, each one afraid to speak and yet ashamed of his own +tender helplessness. At last Mr. Winkle looking steadily in the crown of +his hat, said huskily, "By gad, boys, there is something rotten in the +state of Denmark." They all three laughed with an effort, but kept their +eyes averted. + +"It is a rat in the wainscoting of the storeroom," said John Boler, with +a desperate attempt to regain his old manner and tone, "and I've got +to go and look after it or there'll be the devil to pay with the Boler +House." And he ran down the stairs three steps at a time heartily +ashamed of his own remark, but determined not to allow the tears to show +themselves either in his eyes or voice, and feeling that his only safety +was in flight. + +But Mr. Winkle had not stood silently behind the doctor's chair all that +time for nothing, and if his nature was somewhat light, and if he had +taken life so far as something of a jest, he was by no means without +a heart. He did not now trouble himself very greatly about the tangled +problems of existence, but he felt quite equal to dealing with any given +case effectively and on short notice. With systems he was helpless, +with individuals he could deal promptly. Therefore he, in common with +the doctor and Mr. Boler, and, indeed, with most of us, occupied himself +with the girl he saw suffering and in need. + +When she had cried out, "But the rest, the others, what of them?" he had +said nothing, because he had nothing to say. He was vaguely aware that +when the smallpox broke out on one of Dr. Ralston's patients that astute +practitioner did not essay to treat each individual pustule separately +as the whole of the disease and so devote his entire skill and mind to +each in turn until it was cured. But then he could not undertake to cure +the whole human race of its various social ailments any more than Dr. +Ralston could hope to look after all of its physical pains. So Mr. +Winkle took this one little social pustule upstairs as his particular +charge, and in his own peculiar way went about securing better +conditions for her, leaving the "others who think too much" to somebody +else, or to fate, as the case might be. Therefore, when Mr. Winkle +reached the street door and met an officer of the law who had come +prepared to learn the whereabouts of the would-be suicide or else take +Mr. John Boler and Dr. Ralston into custody, the old gentleman made up +his mind to begin his part in the future proceedings without further +delay. + +Unknown to Mr. Winkle himself, literature had lost a great novelist when +he had gone into the mercantile business, and the surprises which he now +sprang upon the policeman were no less astonishing and interesting to +himself than they were to that astute guardian of the public morals. + +"Want to know where she is, do you? Well, don't worry Johnnie Boler any +more. They've already got him so his mind is a little affected. I'll +tell you all about that girl. Her name is Estelle Morris. She worked for +me for nine years as a nursery governess. Last month my youngest child +died, and it upset Estelle so that she has been out of her head ever +since. I thought if I'd bring her to the city maybe she might get over +it, but she didn't, and the doctor gave her some stuff and she took +a double dose by mistake, and all the row came from that and the +long tongues of the servants, pieced out by the long pencils of the +reporters. See!" + +"Is that so?" exclaimed the officer. "Where is she now?" + +Mr. Winkle had not thought of that, and he did not know exactly what to +say; but he agreed to produce her in court on the following day if so +ordered, and there the matter dropped for the moment. + +That evening there appeared in a paper this "want:" "A good-looking +young woman who is willing to lie like a pirate for the space of +one hour for the sum of $50. May have to go to court." The number of +handsome girls who were anxious to lend the activity of their tongues +for the purpose named and the amount stipulated was quite wonderful. One +particularly bright young miss remarked that she had been in training +for just that position for years. She was confidential correspondent for +a broker. Mr. Winkle accepted her on the spot. + +"Now," said he, "look solemn and sad. That is right. You do it first +rate. Whatever I tell about you you are to stick to. Understand that?" + +"Perfectly. Years of practice," she responded, with entire simplicity +and without a suspicion of humor. + +"Your name is Estelle Morris, and you have been the governess of my +children for nine years. How old are you?" + +"Nineteen," said Estelle Morris demurely. + +"Good gracious, girl, what could you teach at ten years of age? You've +got to be older. Take the curl out of your hair in front and put on a +bonnet with strings. I heard my niece say that made her look ten years +older. Mind you, you are not a day under twenty-six. Not a day." + +"All right," said Estelle Morris thoughtfully. + +"You are to look sick, too, and--" + +"Oh, I can fix _that_ easy enough. I'll--" + +"Well, then fix it and come back here at exactly two o'clock this +afternoon." + +At the appointed hour, Mr. Winkle met Miss Estelle Morris and took her +with great dignity and care to the Boler House, where he was joined +by another gentleman--an officer of the law--and the three started out +together. + +"The examination was strictly private in deference to the wishes of the +parties first implicated, John Boler and Dr. Ralston, and because it is +now believed that the girl is more sinned against than sinning," wrote +the reporter for the morning rival of the _Screamer_. "It is the object +of justice to help the erring to start anew in life wherever that line +of action is consonant with the stern necessities of the blind goddess. +Neither of the male accomplices appeared in the case, but Mr. +Silas Winkle--whose name has figured somewhat conspicuously in the +matter--produced the principal, who, it must be confessed, is pretty +enough to account for all the chivalry which has been displayed in +her behalf. She confessed to twenty-six years of single wretchedness, +although she could easily pass for a year or two younger. It would +appear that she had lived in Mr. Winkle's family for nine years as +governess to his children and came to the city with him about two weeks +ago. The justice accepted this explanation of the relations existing +between them, and that there was no attempt at suicide at all, but only +an accidental overdose of a remedy prescribed by Dr. Ralston, which +explained satisfactorily the doctor's connection with the unsavory +case, and places him once more in the honorable position from which this +unfortunate affair so nearly hurled him. In short, the justice said in +substance, 'not guilty, and don't do it any more.' The young woman bowed +modestly, and Silas Winkle led her from the court-room a sadder, and, +let us hope, a wiser woman. Such as she must have much to live for. Many +a man has braved death for a face less lovely than hers. This ends the +'Boler House Mystery,' which, after all, turns out to be only a tempest +in a teapot, with a respectable father of a family and his children's +governess for _dramatis persono_ and a fresh young reporter on a certain +sensational morning contemporary as general misinformer of the public +as usual." This was headlined, "_Exploded--Another Fake by Our Esteemed +Contemporary_." + +That night John Boler rubbed his eyes when he read the report. "I +thought you were a bachelor, Mr. Winkle," said he, "and here you produce +in court a governess--" + +"I am," said Mr. Winkle, laughing, and then he showed his "want" +advertisement. "That is the whole case, Johnnie, my boy, but it is all +over now. Don't you worry; it might go to your head again. You saved the +girl and I saved you, and it only cost me $50. I'd pay that any time +to get ahead of the _Screamer_, and I rather think I salted that +enterprising sheet down this time, don't you? But what is to become of +that girl?" added he, without waiting for a reply to his first question. +"You've taken the liberty to save her life, which she had decided she +did not want under existing circumstances. Has she simply got to go over +the same thing again? I told her that I'd look after her, but I don't +see how in thunder I'm going to do it. She won't take money from me and +_I've_ got nothing for her to do. Is there nothing ahead of her but a +coffin or a police court?" + +"For this individual girl, yes. Dr. Ralston has already secured work +for her; but for all the thou-sands of her kind--" John Boler's voice +trembled a little and he stopped speaking to hide it. He in common with +most men was heartily ashamed of his better nature. + +"For all the thousands of her kind," broke in Mr. Winkle, "there are +just exactly three roads open--starvation, suicide, or shame, with the +courts, the legislature, and the newspapers on the side of the latter. +I just tell you, Johnnie, it makes my blood boil. I--I don't see any way +out of it--none at all. That is the worst of it." + +"I do," said Mr. Boler. + +"_You do!_" exclaimed Mr. Winkle excitedly, and then looked hard at his +old friend's son to see if he had gone crazy again. + +"Yes, I do. Those same newspapers you are so down on will do it. They're +bound to. The boys go wrong sometimes, as they did in this case; but +that only makes sensible people indignant, and, after all, it called +attention to the law that makes such things possible. _More light on +the laws_. That's the first thing we want, and no matter which side of +a question the papers take, we are bound to get that in the long run. +Silence is the worst danger. We get pretty mad at the boys if they write +what we don't like, but that isn't half so dangerous as if they didn't +write at all. See?" + +Mr. Winkle turned slowly away and shook his head as he murmured to +himself: "Who would have believed that old John Boler would have been +the father of a lunatic? Dear me, dear me. I'm going back to Meadville +before I get touched in the head myself." And he started to his room to +pack his valise. John Boler followed him to the elevator. + +"I don't blame you for feeling pretty mad about all the stuff they put +in the _Screamer_ about you; but--oh, the boys _mean_ all right--" + +"So does the devil," broke in the old man. But Mr. Boler gave no +evidence of noticing the interruption nor of observing the irascibility +of his guest. + +"The trouble is with the system," he went on, entering the elevator +after Mr. Winkle. "Why, just look at it, man. What I say or do, if it is +of a public nature, I'm responsible for _to_ the public. What you write +you put your name to; but it's a pretty big temptation to a young fellow +who knows he has got the swing in a newspaper and doesn't have to sign +his name to what he says, to make an effort to 'scoop' his rivals at +whatever cost. The boys don't mean any harm, but irresponsible power is +a mighty dangerous weapon to handle. Not many older men can be trusted +to use it wisely. Then why should we expect it of those young fellows +who don't know yet any of the deeper meanings of life? Great Scott, man! +_I_ think they do pretty well under the circumstances. I'm afraid I'd do +worse." + +Mr. Winkle stroked his chin reflectively. + +"No doubt, no doubt," he said abstractedly, as they stepped out of the +elevator. + +John Boler looked at him for a brief space of time to see if he had +intended the thrust and then went on: + +"That girl's life or death just meant an item to the boys, and it didn't +mean much more to you or me until--until we stood and heard her talk and +saw her suffer, and were made personally uncomfortable by it. Yet we are +old enough to know all about it for her and others. We _do_ know it, and +go right along as if we didn't. We are a pretty bad lot, don't you think +so?" + +Silas Winkle unlocked his door before he spoke. Then he turned to his +old friend's son and shook his hand warmly. + +"Good-bye," he said, looking at him steadily. "Good-bye, Johnnie. I see +it only comes on you at odd spells. Come up to Meadville for a while +and I think you will get over it altogether. Your father was the +clearest-headed man I ever saw and you seem to have lucid intervals. +Those last remarks of yours were worthy of your father, my boy," and the +old man patted him softly on the back. + +John Boler whistled all the way downstairs. Then he laughed. + +"I wonder if old Winkle really does think I am off my base," said he, +as he took down his hat. "I suppose we are all more or less crazy. He +thinks I am and I know he is. It is a crazy world. Only lunatics could +plan or conduct it on its present lines." And he laughed again and then +sighed and passed out into the human stream on Broadway. + + + + +THE TIME LOCK OF OUR ANCESTORS. + +_"Visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third +and fourth generation._"--Bible. + + +"Don't be so hard on yourself, Nellie. I am sure it can be no great +wrong you have done. Girls like you are too apt to be morbid. No doubt +we all do it, whatever it is. I'm sure I shall not blame you when you +tell me. Perhaps I shall say you are quite right--that is, if there is +any right and wrong to it, and provided I know which is which, after I +hear the whole story--as most likely I shall not. Right--" + +And here the elder woman smiled a little satirically, and looked out +of the window with a far-away gaze, as if she were retravelling through +vast spaces of time and experience far beyond anything her friend could +comprehend. + +The evening shadows had gathered, and cast, as they will, a spell of +gravity and exchange of confidences over the two. + +Presently the older woman began speaking again: + +"Do you know, Nell, I was always a little surprised that Lord Byron, of +all people, should have put it that way: + + "I know the right, and I approve it too; + Condemn the wrong--and yet the wrong pursue. + +"_The_ right '--why, it is like a woman to say that. As if there were +but one 'right,' and it were dressed in purple and fine linen, and +seated on a throne in sight of the assembled multitude! '_The right._' +indeed! Yes, it sounds like a woman--and a very young woman at that, +Nellie." + +The girl looked with large, troubled, passionate eyes at her friend, and +then broke out into hot, indignant words--words that would have offended +many a woman; but Florence Campbell only laughed, a light, queer little +peal; tipped her chair a trifle farther back, put her daintily slippered +feet on the satin cushion of the low window-seat, and looked at her +friend, through the gathering darkness, from under half-closed eyelids. + +Presently--this woman was always deliberate in her conversation; long +silences were a part of her power in interesting and keeping the full +attention of her listeners--presently she said: + +"Of course you think so. Why shouldn't you? So did I--once. And do you +know, Nellie, that sort of sentiment dies hard--_very_ hard--in a woman. +At your age--" Florence Campbell always spoke as if she were very old, +although to look at her one would say that she was not twenty-eight. + +These delicately formed Dresden-china women often carry their age +with such an easy grace--it sits upon them so lightly--in spite of +ill-health, mental storms, and moral defeats, that while their more +robust sisters grow haggard and worn, and hard of feature and tone, +under weights less terrible and with feelings less intense, they keep +their grace and gentleness of tone in the teeth of every blast. + +"At your age, dear, I would have scorned a woman who talked as I do now; +and more than that, I would have suspected her, as you do not suspect +me, of being a very dangerous and not unlikely a very bad person +indeed--simply from choice. While you--you generous little soul--think +that I am better than I talk." + +She laughed again, and shifted her position as if she were not wholly +comfortable under the troubled gaze of the great eyes she knew were +fastened upon her. + +"You think I am better than my opinions. I know exactly what you tell +yourself about me when you are having it out with yourself upstairs. +Oh, I know! You excuse me for saying this on the theory that it was not +deliberate--was an oversight. You account for that by the belief that I +am not well--my nerves are shaken. You are perfectly certain that _I_ am +all right, no matter what I do, or say, or think." She took her little +friend's soft hand as it twisted nervously a ribbon in her lap, and held +the back of it against her cheek, as she often did. "But just suppose it +were some one else--some other woman, Nellie, you would suspect her +(no doubt quite unfairly) of all the crimes in the statute-books. Oh, I +know, I know, child! I did--at your age--and, sad to relate, _I_ had no +Florence Campbell to soften my judgments on even one of my sex." + +She had grown serious as she talked, and her voice almost trembled. The +instant she recognized this herself, she laughed again, and said gayly: + +"Oh, I was a very severe judge--once--I do assure you, though you may +not think so now." She dropped her voice to a tone of mocking solemnity, +not uncommon with her, and added: "If you won't tell on me, I'll make a +little confession to you, dear;" and she took both of the girl's hands +firmly in her own and waited until the promise was given. + +"I wouldn't have it get out for the world, but the fact is, Nell, I +sometimes strongly suspect that, at your age, I was--a most unmitigated, +self-righteous little prig." + +Nellie's hands gave a disappointed little jerk: but her friend held them +firmly, laughed gayly at her discomfiture--for she recognized fully +that the girl was attuned to tragedy--buried her face in them! for an +instant, and then deliberately kissed in turn each pink little palm--not +omitting her own. Then she dropped those of her friend, and leaned back +against her cushions and sighed. + +Nellie was puzzled and annoyed. She was on the verge of tears. + +"Florence, darling," she said presently, "if I did not know you to be +the best woman in the world, I shouldn't know what to make of your dark +hints, and of--and of you. You are always a riddle to me--a beautiful +riddle, with a good answer, if only I could guess it. You talk like a +fiend, sometimes, and you act like--an angel, always." + +"Give me up. You can't guess me. Fact is, I haven't got any answer," +laughed Florence. + +But the girl went steadily on without seeming to hear her: "Do you know, +there are times when I wonder if it would be possible to be insane and +vicious, mentally and _verbally_, as it were, and perfectly sane and +exaltedly good morally." + +Florence Campbell threw herself back on her cushions and laughed gayly, +albeit a trifle hysterically. "Photograph taken by an experienced +artist!" she exclaimed. "You've hit me! Oh, you've hit me, Nell." Then +sitting suddenly bolt-upright, she looked the girl searchingly in the +face, and said slowly: "Do you know, Nellie, that I am sometimes tempted +to tell the truth? About myself, I mean--and to _you_. Never on any +other subject, nor to anybody else, of course," she added dryly, in +comedy tones, strangely contrasting with the almost tragic accents as +she went on. "But I can't. '_The_ truth!' Why, it is like _the_ right; +I'm sure I don't know what it is; and it has been so long--oh, so +cruelly long--since I told it, by word or action, that I have lost its +very likeness from my mind. I have told lies and acted lies so long--" +Her friend's eyes grew indignant and she began to protest, but Florence +ran on: "I have evaded facts--not only to others, but to myself, +until--until I'd have to swear out a search-warrant and have it served +on my mental belongings to find out myself what I _do_ think or feel or +want on any given subject." + +It was characteristic of the woman to use this flippant method of +expression, even in her most intense moments. + +"I change so, Nell; sometimes suddenly--all in a flash." + +There was a long silence. Then she began again, quite seriously: + +"There is a theory, you know, that we inherit traits and conditions from +our remote ancestors as well as from our immediate ones. I sometimes +fancy that they descend to some people with a Time Lock attachment. A +child is born"--she held out her hands as if a baby lay on them--"he +is like his mother, we will say, gentle, sweet, kind, truthful, for +years--let us say seven. Suddenly the Time Lock turns, and the traits of +his father (modified, of course, by the acquired habits of seven years) +show themselves strongly--take possession, in fact. Another seven years, +and the priggishness of a great-uncle, the stinginess of an aunt, or the +dullness, in books, of a rural grandfather. Then, in keeping with the +next two turns of the Lock, he falls in love with every new face he +sees, marries early and indulges himself recklessly in a large family. +He is an exemplary husband and father, as men go, an ideal business man, +and a general favorite in society." + +She was running on now as if her words had the whip-hand of her. + +"Everybody remarks upon the favorable change since his stupid, priggish +college days. All this time, through every change, he has been honorable +and upright in his dealings with his fellows. Suddenly the Time Lock +of a Thievish Ancestor is turned on; he finds temptation too strong +for even that greatly under-estimated power--the force of habit of +a lifetime--and the trust funds in his keeping disappear with him to +Canada. Everybody is surprised, shocked, pained--and he, no doubt, +more so than any one else. Emotional insanity is offered as a possible +explanation by the charitable; longheaded, calculating, intentional +rascality, by the severe or self-righteous. And he? Well, he is wholly +unable to account for it at all. He _knows_ that he had not lived all +these years as a conscious, self-controlled thief. He _knows_ that the +temptations of his past life had never before taken that particular +form. He _knows_ that the impulse was sudden, blinding, overwhelming; +but he does not know why and how. It was like an awful dream. He seemed +to be powerless to overcome it. The Time Lock had turned without his +knowledge, and in spite of himself. The unknown, unheard-of Thievish +Ancestor took possession, as it were, through force of superior strength +and ability--and then it was his hour. The hereditary shadow on the dial +had come around to him. The great-uncle's hour was past. _He_, no doubt, +was 'turned on' to some other dazed automaton--in Maine or Texas--who +had fallen heir to a drop too much of his blood, and she, poor thing, if +it happened to be a girl this time, forthwith proceeded to fall in love +with her friend's husband--seeing he was the only man at hand at the +time; while the Thievish Ancestor left--in shame and contrition--a +small but light-fingered boy in Georgia, to keep his engagement with +our respectable, highly honored, and heretofore highly honorable man of +affairs in Wall street. The Time Lock of heredity had been set for this +hour, and the machinery of circumstances oiled the wheels and silently +moved the dial." There was absolute silence when Florence Camp-bell's +voice ceased. The heavy curtains made the shadows in the struggling +moonlight deep and solemn. Two great eyes looked out into the darkness +and a shudder passed over her frame. She thought her little friend +had fallen asleep, she lay so still and quiet on the rug at her feet. +Florence sighed, and thought how quickly youth forgot its troubles and +how lightly Care sat on her throne. Then suddenly a passionate sobbing +broke the silence, and two arms, covered with lace and jewels, flung +themselves around the older woman's knees. + +"O my God! Florence; O my God! is there no way to stop the wheels? +Must they go blindly on? Can we _never_ know who or what we shall be +to-morrow? It is awful, Florence, awful; and--it--is _true!_ O God! it +is _true!_" + +Florence Campbell had been very serious when she stopped her little +harangue. There had been a quality in her voice which, while it was not +wholly new to her friend, _would_ have been unknown to many who thought +they knew her well. To them she was a beautiful, fashionable, rather +light woman, with a gay nature, who either did not know, or did not care +to investigate too closely, the career of her husband, to whom she was +devotedly attached. + +She had been quite serious, I say, when she stopped her little +philosophical speculation; but she was greatly surprised at the storm +she had raised in the breast of her little friend. + +Florence bent down quickly, and putting her arms about the girl tried to +raise her up; but she only sobbed the harder, and clung to her friend's +knees as a desperate, frightened creature might cling to its only +refuge. + +"Why, Nellie, little kitten," said the older woman, using a term of +endearment common with her in talking with the girl--"why, Nellie, +little kitten, what in the world is the matter? Did I scare the life out +of you with my Time Locks and my gruesome ancestors?" and she tried to +laugh a little; but the sound of her voice was not altogether pleasant +to the ear. "I'll ring for a light. I had no business to talk such stuff +to you when you were blue and in the dark too. I guess, Nell, that the +Time Lock of _my_ remote ancestor, who was a fool, must have been turned +on me shortly after sundown to-day, don't you think?" And this time her +laugh lacked the note of bitterness it had held before. + +She ran on, still caressing the weeping girl at her feet: + +"Yes, undoubtedly, my Remote Ancestor--the fool--has now moved in. Do +you think you can stand seven years of him, kitten, if you live with +me that long? But you won't. You'll go and marry some horrid man, and I +shall be so jealous that my hair will curl at sight of him." + +But the girl would not laugh. She refused to be cheered, nor would she +have a light. She raised herself until her head rested on her friend's +bosom, and clung to her, sobbing as if her heart would break. Florence +stroked her hair and sat silent for a while, wondering just what had +so shaken the child. She knew full well that it was _not_ what she had +hinted of the darkness and her gruesome story. Presently Nellie drew her +friend's face down, and whispered between her sobs: + +"Darling, I must have had some dreadful ancestor, a wicked--_wicked_ +woman. I--" + +Florence Campbell shrieked with laughter. She felt relieved of--she did +not know what. She had blamed herself for even unconsciously touching +the secret spring of sorrow in the girl's heart. It was a strange +sight, the two women clinging to each other, the one sobbing, the other +laughing, each trying in vain to check the other. + +At last Nellie said, still almost in a whisper: "But, Florence, you do +not know. You do not understand. You are too good to know. It is you +who will scorn and hate me when I tell you. O Florence, Florence, I +can never _dare_ to tell you!" Her friend, still laughing, made +little ejaculations of satirical import as the girl grew more and more +hysterical. + +"O thou wicked wretch!" laughed she. "No doubt you've killed your man, +as they say out West. Oh, dear--oh, dear! Nell, this is really quite +delicious! Did it step on a bug? Or was it a great big spider? And does +it think it ought to be hanged for the crime? A peal of laughter from +the one, a shudder from the other, was the only reply to these efforts +to break the force of the girl's self-reproach. Florence clinched her +small fist in mock heroics and began again: + +"Your crimes have found you out! And mine--_mine_--has been the avenging +hand! Really, this is too good, kitten. I shall tell, let me see--I +shall tell--_Tom!_" + +The girl was on her feet in a flash. + +"Not that! _not that_, Florence! Anything but that! I will tell you +myself first--_he_ shall not?" Florence grew suddenly silent and grave. +The girl slipped down at her knees again, and clasping her hand, went +hoarsely on: + +"O Florence, darling, I did not mean to wrong you! Truly, truly, I did +not--and I do not believe _he_ did--not at--first. We--oh, it was--" +she sank on the floor, at the feet of her astonished friend, and with +upstretched arms in the darkness whispered: "Florence, Florence--O my +God! I _cannot_ tell you! I must go away! _I must go away!_" The older +woman did not touch the outstretched hands and they sank to the floor, +and on them rested a tear-stained, wretched face. + +A moment later Tom Campbell entered the room. To eyes unaccustomed to +the darkness nothing was visible. He did not see his wife, who arose as +he entered, and stood with bated breath over the form of the girl on the +floor. + +"By Jove!" he muttered, "this room is as dark as Egypt, and then +some--Wonder where Florence is. Those damned servants ought to be shot! +Whole house like a confounded coal-pit! Didn't expect me for hours yet, +I suppose! That's no reason for living like a lot of damned bats! 'Fraid +of musquitoes, I suppose. Where are those matches? _Florence!_ She's +evidently gone out--or to bed. Wonder where her little 'kitten' is? +Umm--wonder how much longer Florence means to keep her here? Don't see +how the thing's going to go on much longer this way, with a girl with a +conscience like that. Perfectly abnormal! Perfectly ridiculous! Umm--no +more tact than--" + +Nellie moaned aloud. Florence had held her breath, hoping he would +go. He had almost reached the door leading to the hall, after his vain +search for matches. + +"Hello! what was that?" said Campbell, turning again into the room. + +His wife knew that escape was not now possible. "Nothing, Tom," she +said, in a voice that trembled a little. "Go upstairs. I will come up +soon." + +"Why, hello, Florence, that you? What are you sitting here in the dark +for, all alone? Why didn't you speak to me when I came in? What did you +let me--" + +Nellie sat up, and in doing so overturned a chair. + +Tom's eyes had grown accustomed to the darkness. He saw the two women +outlined before him, and he saw that Nellie had been on the floor, and +that his wife stood over her. + +"What's the matter?" he demanded. "What's up?" + +He came toward them. Nellie sprang to her feet, with flashing eyes and +outstretched, imploring hands to wave him back. She was about to rush +into a painful explanation. Florence stepped toward her, put both arms +about her, and drew her onto the cushioned window-seat at their side. +She knew she must cover the girl's agitation from her husband, and +somehow gain time to think. + +"Sit down, dear," she said softly. "Sit down here by me. You have been +asleep. He frightened you coming in so suddenly. You have been dreaming; +you talked in your sleep--but it was all nonsense--about an ancestor, +whom you blamed very bitterly." + +The girl began to speak impulsively, but Florence checked her. + +"Yes, I know. You told me. It was all the greatest stuff. But the part +that was true--I doubt if she was to blame. I think, from all I know +of--of her, and of the gentleman you mentioned, the one she--seemed to +care for--that--oh, no, kitten! I am _sure she_ was not to blame." + +Nellie was trembling violently, clinging to her friend in shame and +remorse. Tom stood perfectly quiet in the deeper darkness, back from +the window, with a smile on his cheerful face and a puzzled light in his +handsome eyes. + +"Go upstairs, Tom," said Florence again, this time in a steadier tone. +"Nellie's head aches; you waked her up too suddenly. We don't want more +light--do we, Nellie? Not just now. We have quite light enough for the +present. I assure you we are better off just now in the dark. You would +think so yourself if you could see us as we see ourselves. We are +quite battered and out at elbow, I assure you, and not at all fit for +fastidious masculine eyes." + +She was pulling herself up well. "To-morrow we will spruce up our bangs, +put on fresh gowns, and not know ourselves for the wretches we are +tonight. Until then, Sir Knight, no masculine eye shall rest upon our +dilapidation. Go!" + +Tom Campbell had seen his wife in this mood before. He went. + +All the way upstairs he wondered what had happened. "Never could make +women out anyway," he muttered; "least of all, Florence. Women are a +queer lot. More you live with 'em, more you don't know what they'll do +next. Wonder what in thunder's up. 'Kitten' never said a word; but I'm +damned if I did't hear her groan! Guess the little goose feels kind +of--queer--with me and the old lady both present. Wonder--whew!--wonder +how much I said aloud, and how much they heard when I first went in! +Confounded habit, talking aloud to myself! Got to stop it, old boy; must +be done--get you into trouble yet!" + +Then he turned off the gas, and was sleeping as peacefully as an infant +before the two women below stairs had parted for the night. + +When Tom left the room, Nellie began to sob again, and Florence stroked +her hair with her icy hands and waited for the girl to speak--or grow +calm. And for herself--she hardly knew what she waited for in herself; +but she felt that she needed time. + +After a long silence she said, quite gently; "Nellie, little girl, we +will go upstairs now; you will go to bed. If you ever feel like it, +after you take time to think it over, and your nerves are quiet--if +you ever feel like it, you may tell just what trick your troublesome +ancestor has tried to play you; but I want to say now, dear, don't feel +that you _must_ tell me, nor that I do not know perfectly well that +my little kitten is all right, ancestors or no ancestors, and that we, +together can somehow find the combination to that Time Lock that so +distresses you, and turn it off again. Meantime, little girl _no one_ +shall harm you. You shall be let alone; you are all right! Be _sure_ of +that. I am. Now, good-night;" and she kissed the still sobbing girl on +the forehead and hands, in spite, of her protests and self-accusations. + +Suddenly Nellie sank on her knees again, and grasped Florence's dress as +she had turned to go: + +"O Florence! O Florence! are you human? How _can_ you? You are not like +other women! O my God! if I could only be like you; but you frighten me! +You are so calm. How cold your hands are! oh--" + +"Are they? I did not notice. Oh well, no matter; it is an old trick of +theirs, you know." + +Florence Campbell's voice was very steady now. Her words were slow and +deliberate--they sounded as if she was very tired; and her step, as she +climbed the stairs, had lost its spring and lightness. + +The next morning Nellie's breakfast was carried to her room, with a +message from Florence not to get up until she came to her at their usual +hour for reading together. + +About noon, as the girl lay thinking for the hundredth time that she +must get up and face life again--that she must somehow stop this +blinding headache, and go away--that she must die--Florence swept into +the room, trailing her soft, long gown behind her, and gently closed the +door. She had put on a gay pink tea-gown, with masses of white lace and +smart little bows in unexpected places. + +"Feel better, dear?" she asked, gayly. "Griggs told me your head ached, +and that you had not slept well. I confess I did not either--not very. +Tom and I talked rather late; you know he sails for Liverpool at noon. +Sure enough, you didn't know. Well, no matter. The vessel is just about +sailing now. Yes, it is _rather_ sudden. We talked so much of it last +night that it seems quite an old story to me to-day, though. You know +he was to go in two weeks, anyway. It seemed best to go earlier, so I +helped him pack, and saw him to the steamer two hours ago. You know a +man doesn't have to take anything but a tooth-brush and a smoking-cap. +We thought it would be best for his health to go at once. Tom has not +seemed quite himself of late." She did not look at her friend as she +talked and her white face was turned from the light. She talked so fast, +it seemed as if she had rehearsed and was repeating a part with a desire +to have it over as soon as might be. "His Travelling Ancestor, the one +who wants change--change--change in all things, has had hold of him of +late. I'm sure you have noticed how restless he was." + +The girl sat up and listened with wide eyes and flushed cheeks. She had +known many unexpected and unexplained things to be done in the house of +this friend, who had given her a home and a warm welcome a year before, +when she had left school, an orphan and homeless. But this sudden +departure she had not heard even mentioned before. She thought she +understood it. + +"O Florence! Florence!" she cried, passionately. "It is _my_ fault! I +have separated you! I have brought sorrow to you! You, who are so good, +_so good;_ and I--oh, how _can_ you be so kind to me? _Hate_ me! _Hate +me!_ Thrust me from your house, and tell the world I tried to steal your +husband! Tell that I am vile and wicked! Tell--and now I have sent him +away from you, who love him--whom he loves! Why do you not blame me? Why +do you never blame anyone? Why--" + +There was a pause; the girl sobbed bitterly, while the older woman +seemed afraid to trust her voice. After a while in a tired, solemn tone, +Nellie went on: + +"Do you think you can believe a word I say, Florence? Is there any use +for me to tell you the truth?" + +Her friend nodded slowly, looking her steadily in the eyes. Her lips +were tightly drawn together, and her hands were cold and trembling. + +"Then, Florence, I will tell you, truly--truly--truly, as I hope for--" +She was going to say "your forgiveness," but it seemed too cruel to ask +for that just now. "I did not understand, not at first, either him or +myself. I thought he was like you"--she felt Florence shudder--"and +loved me, as he said, as you did. I was so glad and proud, +until--until--O Florence! how can I tell you that I let him _beg_ me to +go away with him! After I understood what he meant, my heart _did_ leap, +even in its utter self-abasement and wretchedness. I let him beg me +twice, and kiss me, _after_ I understood! It must have been my fault; +he said it was"--Florence took her friend's hand in hers--"and he said +that no one else had ever taken his thoughts away from you." + +The girl thought she saw the drawn lips before her curl; but she must +free her whole heart now, and lay bare her very soul. + +"He said that he had always been true to you, Florence, even in thought, +until I--O Florence! I must be worse than anyone one earth. I--he said--" + +Florence Campbell sprang to her feet. "Yes, I know, I know!" she +exclaimed, breathlessly, "and you _believed_ him! Poor little fool! +Women do. Sometimes a second time, but not a third time, dear--not a +third time! Do not blame yourself any more." She stopped, then hurried +on as one will do when danger threatens from within. "If it had not been +you, it would, it might--my God! it might have been worse! Some poor +girl--" + +She stopped again as if choking. The two women looked at each other; +the younger one gave a long, shuddering moan, and buried her face in her +hands. + +Presently Florence said slowly: "All ancestors were not thieves. Some +were simply fickle, and light, and faithless." + +Nellie raised a face full of passionate suffering: "Florence! Florence! +how can you excuse either of us? How _can--_" + +Suddenly, with a great sob, Florence Campbell threw herself into the +girl's outstretched arms, and with a wail of utter desolation cried: +"Hush, Nellie, hush! Never speak of it again, never! Only _love_ me, +_love me--love me!_ I need it so! And _no_ one--no one in all the world +has ever loved me truly!" It was the only time Nellie ever saw Florence +Campbell lose her self-control. + + + + +FLORENCE CAMPBELL'S FATE. + +_"'Tis the good reader that makes the good book; a good head cannot read +amiss; in every book he finds passages which seem confidences or asides +hidden from all else and unmistakably meant for his ear...._" + +_"Every man has a history worth knowing, if he could tell it, or if we +could draw it from him."_--Ralph Waldo Emerson. + + +I was sitting in my office, with my head in my hands, and with both +elbows resting on my desk. I was tired in every nerve of my body; +more than that, I was greatly puzzled over the strange conduct of my +predecessor in the college, whose assistant I had been, and whose place +I was appointed to fill during the unexpired term for which he had been +elected lecturer on anatomy. + +That morning he was to introduce me to the class formally as his +successor, deliver his last lecture, and then retire from active +connection with anatomical instruction. + +Everything appeared to be perfectly arranged, and, indeed, some of the +younger men--under my direction--had taken special pains to provide our +outgoing and much admired professor with rather unusual facilities for a +brilliant close to his career as our instructor. + +I was feeling particularly pleased with the arrangements, when, after a +neat little speech on his part, commendatory of me, and when we supposed +him to be about to begin his lecture, he suddenly turned to me and +said, bluntly: "You will be so good as to take the class to-day. Young +gentlemen, I bid you good morning," and abruptly took up his hat and +left. I sat facing an expectant and surprised class of shrewd young +fellows, and I was quite unprepared to proceed. + +I had intended my first lecture to be a great success. It was ready +for the following day; but my notes were at home, and my position can, +therefore, be better imagined than described. + +I was thinking over this and the strange behavior of my generally +punctilious predecessor, when he entered my office, unannounced, and, +after the ordinary salutations and apologies for having placed me in so +undesirable a position in the morning, he told me the following episode +from his history. I will give it in his own words, omitting, as far as +possible, all comment made by me at the time, thus endeavoring to leave +you alone with him and his story, as I was that night. This will better +enable me to impart the effect to you as it was conveyed to me at the +time. It greatly interested me then, but the more I think it over, +the less am I able to decide, in my own mind, all of the psychological +questions which it aroused then and which it has since called up. This +is the story. + + + + +I. + +I am, as you know, not a young man, and in the practice of my +profession, which has extended over a period of nearly thirty years, I +have learned to diagnose the cases that come under my care very slowly +and by degrees. Every year has taught me, what you will undoubtedly +learn--for I have great hopes for your future career--that physical +symptoms are often the results of mental ailments, and that, while +cordials and powders are sometimes very useful aids, the first and +all-important thing is to understand fully the _true_ history of my +patient. + +I have laid stress upon the word true, simply because while _a_ history +is easy enough to get, about the most difficult matter in this world to +secure is _the_ history of one who comes to a physician ailing in body +or in mind. It is easy enough to treat a broken leg, a gunshot wound, or +even that ghastliest of physical foes, diphtheria, if it is one of these +and nothing more. + +But if it is a broken leg as to outward sign, and a broken heart as an +inward fact, then the case is quite another matter, and the treatment +involves skill of a different kind. + +If the bullet that tore its way through the body was poisoned with the +bitterness of disappointment, anxiety, terror, or remorse, something +more is needed than bandages and beef-tea. + +If diphtheria was contracted solely from a defective sewage-pipe, it +will, no doubt, yield to remedies and pure air. But if long years of +nervous and mental prostration have made ready its reception, the work +to be done is of a much more serious nature. + +So when I was first called to see Florence Campbell, the message +conveyed to me threw no light on the case, beyond what the most ordinary +observer would have detected at a glance. + +The note read thus: + +"Dr. H. Hamilton. + +"Dear Sir: Although I have been in your city for several months, it +is the first time since I came that I have myself felt that I needed +medical attention. I have, therefore, not sent you the enclosed note +(the history of which you no doubt know) until now. If you will read it, +it will explain that the time has now come when, if you will come to me, +I need your care. + +"Yours respectfully, + +"Florence Campbell." + +"Parlor 13, F------ Ave. Hotel." + +The note enclosed was from a physician in Chicago whom I had known +intimately many years before, but with whom, contrary to the hint given +by the lady, I had held no communication for a long time past. It said: + +"My Dear Doctor: One of my patients is about to visit your city. The +length of her stay is uncertain, and, as she is often ailing, she has +asked me to give her a note to one whom I believe to be skilful and to +possess the qualities which she requires in a physician. In thinking +over the list of those known to me in New York, I have decided to give +her this note to you. I need not commend her to you; she will do that +for herself. You will see at a glance that she is a charming woman, and +you will learn in five minutes' conversation with her, that she is a +brilliant one. She is also one of those rare patients to whom you +can afford to tell the unvarnished truth--an old hobby of yours, I +remember--and from whom you can expect it. She has had no serious +illness recently, but is rather subject to slight colds and sick +headache. I give her sulph. 12. She always responds to that in time. + +"Yours, as ever, + +"Thomas C. Griswold." + +I folded the note and laid it on my desk and took up a pen. Then, +on second thought, I turned to the messenger and said, "Say to Miss +Campbell that I will call at four o'clock this afternoon." + +Before I had finished the sentence he was gone, and I laid down the pen +and sat thinking. + +How like Tom Griswold that was--the old Tom of college days--to write +such a note as that and give it to a patient! "Sulph. 12"--and then +I laughed outright at his interpretation of my desire for veracious +relations between patient and practitioner, and re-read his note from +end to end. + +Then I read hers again. Neither of them indicated the slightest need of +haste on my part. + +I pictured a pretty little blonde--I knew Tom's taste. He had been +betrothed to three different girls during the old days, and they had all +been of that type; small, blue-eyed, Dresden-china sort of girls, +who had each pouted--and married someone else in due time, after a +"misunderstanding" with Tom. + +One of these misunderstandings had been over some roses, I remember. +They did not "match" her dress in color, and she was wretched. She told +him he should have known better than to get that shade, when he knew +very well that she never wore anything that would "go with" it. + +He had naturally felt a little hurt, since he had bought the finest +and highest-priced roses to be had, and expected ecstatic praise of his +taste and extravagance. The "misunderstanding" was final, and, after a +wretched evening and several days of tragic grief, five tinted notes of +sorrow, reproach, and pride, they each began to flirt with some one else +and to talk of the inconstancy of the other sex. They vowed, of course, +that they would never marry anybody on earth, and finally engaged +themselves to marry some one else, who perhaps, had just passed through +a similar harrowing experience and was yearning to be consoled. + +I remember that Tom smoked a great deal during this tragic period, that +he looked gloomy, wore only black neckties, and allowed a cold to run on +until it became thoroughly settled and had to be nursed all the rest of +the winter. + +He knew that smoking injured him, and he doubtless had an idea that he +would end his misery by means of this cold, supplemented by nicotine +poison. How near he might have approached to success it would be +difficult to tell, if he had not met my sister Nellie at Christmas-time, +and, after having told his woes to her, promised her, "as a friend," not +to smoke again for three days and then to report to her. The report was +satisfactory, and she then confessed that she had forsworn bonbons for +the same length of time, as a sort of companionship in sacrifice. + +This, of course, impressed Tom as a truly remarkable test of friendship +and sympathy, and,--well, what is the use to tell the rest? + +You will know it. It had no new features, so far as I can now recall, +and I believe that they had been betrothed six months before Nellie +met grave old Professor Menlo and began the study of Greek roots and +mythology. + +I think that, perhaps, Tom would have been all right if it had not been +for the mythology. But Nellie was romantic, and the professor was an +enthusiast in this branch of knowledge, and so, by and by, Tom, poor +devil, took to smoking again--this time it was a pipe--and local +papers were filled with notices of the romantic marriage of "Wisdom and +Beauty," and poor little Nellie wrote a pathetic note to Tom, and sent +it by me, with frantic directions not to allow him to kill himself +because she had not understood her own heart; but that she loved +him truly--as a friend--still, and he must come to see her and _her_ +professor in their new home on the hill. And, dear, dear, what a time +I had with Tom! It is funny enough now; but even I felt sorry for him +then, and shielded him from the least unnecessary pain by telling +the boys that they absolutely must not congratulate me on my sister's +marriage, nor mention it in any way whatever, when Tom was present, +unless they wanted to have trouble with me personally. + +And to think that Tom married Kittie Johnson before he had fairly +finished his first year in the hospital service; and had to take her +home for his father to support! Since then I had seen him from time to +time, and heard of his large practice, his numerous children, and his +elegant home; but he never talked of his wife, although I believed him +to be perfectly satisfied with her. He seemed content, was prosperous +beyond expectation, and had grown fat and gouty, when I last saw him at +a medical convention. He attributed his too great flesh and his gout +to the climate of his Western home, and was constantly threatening to +retire from practice, and said that he should ultimately come to New +York to live. + +Yes, undoubtedly Florence Campbell is a petite blonde, with little white +teeth and a roseleaf cheek, thought I, and I laughed, and rang for my +carriage. + + + + +II. + +I do not know that I ever entered a more delicately perfumed room--and +I am very sensitive to perfumes--than the one in which Florence Campbell +sat. + +She arose from her deep arm-chair as I entered, and, extending her hand, +grasped mine with a vigor unusual in a woman, even when she is well. + +"This is Dr. Hamilton?" she said, in a clear voice, which told nothing +of pain, and was wholly free from the usually querulous note struck by +women who are ill, or who think that they are. "This is Dr. Hamilton? I +am very glad to see you, doctor. I am Florence Campbell. You received a +note from your friend, Dr. Griswold, of Chicago, and one telling how +I came to send it to you--how I came into possession of it." Direct of +speech, clear of voice, hand feverish, but firm in grasp, I commented +mentally, as she spoke. + +This is not what I had expected. This is not the limp little blonde that +I had pictured, on a lounge, in tears, with the light fluffy hair in +disorder, and a tone of voice which plead for sympathy. This is not the +figure I had expected to see. + +She stood with her back to the light, very erect and well poised. + +"Come to the window," I said. "Does your head ache?" That is always a +safe question to ask, you know. + +She laughed. "Oh, I don't know that it does--not particularly. I fancy +there is not enough inside of it to ache much. Mere bone and vacuity +could not do a great deal in that line, could it, doctor?" Then +she laughed again. She looked me in the eyes, and I fancied she was +diagnosing _me_. + +Her eyes were deep, large, and brown, or a dark gray; her complexion +was dark and clear--almost too transparent; her cheeks were flushed a +little; and the light in her eyes was unnaturally intense. + +She was evidently trying to gain time--to take my measure. + +"It is always a rather trying thing to get a new doctor; don't you think +so?" she asked, with another little laugh. "I always feel so foolish to +think I have called him to come for so trifling a matter as my ailments +are. I am never really ill, you know," she said with nervous haste; "but +I am not very strong, and so I often feel--rather--under the weather, +and I always fancy that a doctor can prevent, or cure it; but I suppose +he cannot. I shall really not expect a great deal of you, in that line, +doctor. I cannot expect you to furnish me with robust ancestors, can I? +Just so you keep me out of bed"--and here, for the first time, I noticed +a slight tremor in her voice--"just keep me so that I can read, +and--so that I shall not need to sit alone, and--think--I shall be quite +satisfied--quite." She had turned her face away, as she said the last; +but I saw that she was having a hard struggle to keep back the tears, +notwithstanding the little laugh that followed. + +I had felt her pulse; it was hardly perceptible, and fluttered rather +than beat; and I had watched her closely as she spoke; but whenever she +came near the verge of showing deeper than the surface she broke in with +that non-committal little laugh, or turned her face, or half closed her +great eyes, and I was foiled. Her pulse and the faint blue veins told me +one story; she tried to tell me quite another. + +"How are you suffering to-day," I asked. + +She looked steadily at me a moment, then lowered her eyes, raised her +left hand (upon which I remember noticing there was a handsome ring), +looked at its palm a moment, held her lips tightly closed, and then, +with a sudden glance at me, again as if on the defensive said: + +"I hardly know; I am only a little under the weather; I am weak. I +am losing my--grip--on myself; I am--losing my grip--on my--nerves. I +cannot afford to do that." The last was said with more emotion than she +cared to display. So she arose, walked swiftly to the dressing-case, +took up a lace handkerchief, glanced at herself in the mirror, moved a +picture (I noticed that it was a likeness of an old gentleman, perhaps +her father), and returned to a chair which stood in the shadow, and +then, with a merry little peal of laughter, said: "Well, I don't wonder, +doctor, that you are unable to diagnose that case. It would require a +barometer to do that I fancy, from the amount of weather I got into it. +But really, now, how am _I_ to know what is the matter with me? That is +for you to say; I am not the doctor. If you tell me it is malaria, as +all of you do, I shall be perfectly satisfied--and take your powders +with the docility of an infant in arms. I suppose it _is_ malaria, don't +you?" + +I wanted to gain time--to study her a little. I saw that she was, or had +been really ill; ill, that is, in mind if not in body. I fancied that +she had succeeded in deceiving Griswold into treating her for some +physical trouble which she did not have, or, if she had it, only as a +result of a much graver malady. + +The right branch may have been found and nipped off from time time +when it grew uncomfortably long, but the root, I believed, had not +been touched, and, I thought, had not been even suspected by her former +physician. + +We of the profession, as you very well know, do not always possess that +abiding faith in the knowledge and skill of our brethren that we demand +and expect from outsiders. + +We claim our right to guess over after our associates, and not always to +guess the same thing. + +I believed that Griswold had not fully understood his former patient. +"Sulph. 12," indeed! Then I smiled, and said aloud: + +"Dr. Griswold writes me that in such cases as yours he advises sulph. +12--that it has given relief. Do you call yourself a sulphur patient?" I +watched her narrowly, and if she did not smile in a satirical way, I was +deceived. "Are you out of that remedy? and do you want more of it?" I +asked with a serious face. + +She did not reply at once. There seemed to be a struggle in her mind as +to how much she would let me know. Then she looked at me attentively +for a moment, with a puzzled expression, I thought; an unutterably weary +look crossed her face. She said, slowly, deliberately: "I have no doubt +sulphur will do as well as anything else. Oh! yes--I am decidedly a +sulphur patient, no doubt I suppose I have taken several pints of that +innocent remedy in my time. A number of physicians have given it to +me from time to time. Your friend is not its only devotee. Sulphur and +nux--nux and sulphur! I believe they cure anything short of a broken +heart, or actual imbecility, do they not, doctor?" She laughed, not +altogether pleasantly. + +How far would she go and how far would she let me go, with this +humbuggery? I looked gravely into her eyes, and said, "Certainly they +will do all that, and more. They sometimes hold a patient until a doctor +can decide which of those two interesting complaints is the particular +one to be treated. In _your_ case I am inclined to suspect--the--that it +is--_not_ imbecility. I shall therefore begin by asking you to be good +enough to tell me what it is that affects your heart." + +I had taken her wrist in my hand, as I began to speak. My finger was on +her pulse. It gave a great bound, and then beat rapidly; and although +her face grew a shade paler and her eyes wavered as they tried to look +into mine, I knew that I had both surprised and impressed her. + +She recovered herself instantly, and made up her mind to hedge still +further. "If there is anything the matter with my heart, you are the +first to suspect it. My father, however, died of heart disease, and I +have--always--hoped that I should--die as suddenly. But I shall not! I +shall not! I am so--wiry--so all-enduring. I recover! I always recover!" + +She said this passionately, and as if it were a grave misfortune--as if +she were very old. I pretended to take it humorously. + +"Perhaps at your advanced age your father might have said the same." + +She laughed. She saw a loophole, and immediately took it. "Oh, you think +I am very young, doctor, but I am not. People always think me younger +than I am--at first. I look older when you get used to me. I am nearly +thirty." + +I was surprised; I had taken her to be about twenty-three. + +"In years or in experience?" I said. "Which way do you count your age?" + +She got up suddenly again and walked to the dressing-case, then to the +window. In doing so she raised her hand to her eyes. It was the hand +with the lace handkerchief in it. + +"Experience!" she exclaimed; and then, checking herself. "No, people +never think me so old--not at first," she said, returning to her chair. +"But I suppose I am not too old to be cured with sulph. 12, am I?" Then +she laughed her little nervous, quick laugh, and added: "Dear old Dr. +Griswold, what faith he must have in 'sulph. 12.' and in his patients. +He seems to think that they were made for each other, as it were; +and--of course, I am not a doctor--how do I know they were not?" + +"Miss Campbell," I said, stepping quickly to her side and surprising +her, "you do not need sulphur. You need to be relieved of this strain +on your nerves. Make up your mind to tell me your history to-morrow +morning--to tell it all; I do not want some fairy-tale. Until then, take +these drops to quiet your nerves." + +There were tears in her eyes. She did not attempt to hide them. They +ran down her cheeks, and she simply closed the lids and let them flow. +I took her lace handkerchief and wiped her cheeks. Then I dropped it in +her lap, placed the phial on her stand, took up my hat, and left. + + + + +III. + +But I did not get her story the next day, nor the next, nor the next. + +Her tact was perfectly mystifying in its intricacy; her power of evasion +marvellous, and her study of me amusing. She grew weaker and more +languid every day; but insisted that she had no pain--"nothing upon +which to hang a symptom," she would say. + +I suggested that refuge of all puzzled doctors--a change. + +"A change!" she said, wearily. "A change! Let me see, I have been here +nearly five months. I stayed two months in the last place. I was nine +days in San Francisco, one year doing the whole of Europe, and seven +months in Asia. Yes, decidedly, I must need a change. There are three +places left for me to try, which one do you advise?" There was a bitter +little laugh, but her expression was sweet, and her eyes twinkled as she +glanced at me. + +"I am glad I have three places to choose from," I said. "I was afraid +you were not going to leave so many as that, and had already begun to +plan 'electric treatment' as a final refuge." + +She laughed nervously, but I thought I saw signs of a mental change. + +I had always found that I could do most with her by falling into her +own moods of humor or merry satire upon her own condition or upon the +various stages of medical ignorance and pretence into which we are often +driven. + +"Where are these three unhappy places that you have so shamelessly +neglected? Was it done in malice? I sincerely hope, for their sakes, +that it was not so bad as that--that it was a mere oversight on your +part," I went on. + +"Australia has been spared my presence so far through malice; the other +two, through defective theology. I dislike the idea of one of them +on account of the climate, and of the other, because of the stupid +company," she said, with a droll assumption of perplexity; "so, you +see, I can't even hope for a pleasant change after death. Oh, my case is +quite hopeless, I assure you, doctor; _quite!_" She laughed again. + +I had her where I wanted her now. I thought by a little adroitness I +might get, at least, a part of the truth. + +"So you are really afraid to die, and yet think that you must," I said, +bluntly. + +She turned her great luminous eyes on me, and her lip curled slightly, +with real scorn, before she forced upon her face her usual mask of +good-hum-ored sarcasm. + +"Afraid!" she exclaimed, "afraid to die! afraid of what, pray? I cannot +imagine being afraid to die. It is _life_ I am afraid of. If I could +only--" This last passionately. She checked herself abruptly, and with +an evident effort resumed her usual light air and tone. "But it does +always seem so absurdly impossible to me, doctor, to hear grownup people +talk about being afraid to die. It almost surprised me into talking +seriously, a reprehensive habit I never allow myself. A luxury few can +afford, you know. It skirts too closely the banks of Tragedy. One is +safer on the high seas of Frivolity--don't you think?" + +"Much safer, no doubt, my child," said I, taking her hand, which was +almost as cold and white as marble; "much safer from those deceived and +confiding persons who prescribe 'sulph. 12' for the broken heart and +overwrought nerves of a little woman who tries bravely to fly her gay +colors in the face of defeat and to whistle a tune at a grave." + +I had called late, and we were sitting in the twilight, but I saw tears +fall on her lap, and she did not withdraw her hand, which trembled +violently. + +I had touched the wound roughly--as I had determined to do--but, old man +as I was, and used to the sight of suffering as I had been for years, I +could restrain myself only by an effort from taking her in my arms and +asking her to forget what I had said. She seemed so utterly shaken. We +sat for some moment in perfect silence, except for her quick, smothered +little sobs, and then she said, passionately: + +"Oh, my God! doctor, how did you know?" And then, with a flash of fear in +her voice, "Who told you? No one has talked me over to you? No one has +written to you?" + +"I know nothing, except what I have seen of your brave fight, my child. +All the information I have had about you, from outside, was contained in +that valuable little note of introduction from Griswold." + +In spite of her tears and agitation she smiled, but looked puzzled, as I +afterward recalled she always did when I mentioned his name, or spoke as +if she knew him well. + +"I have not watched you for nothing. And I never treat a patient without +first diagnosing his case. I do not say that I am _always_ right. I am +not vain of the methods nor of the progress of my profession; but I am, +at least, not blind, and I have always been interested in you. I should +like to help you, if you will let me. I can do nothing for you in the +dark." Then dropping my voice, significantly: "Does _he_ know where you +are? Does _he_ know you are ill?" + +There was a long silence. I did not know but that she was offended. She +was struggling for command of her voice, and for courage. Presently she +said, in a hoarse whisper, which evidently shocked her as much as it +startled me, so unnatural did it sound: + +"Who? My husband?" + +"Your _husband!_" I exclaimed. "Are you--is there--I did not know you +were married. Why did you always allow me to call you _Miss_ Campbell?" + +"I do not know," she said, wearily. "It made no difference to me, and it +seemed to please your fancy to treat me as a child.. But I never really +noticed that you did always call me Miss. If I had, I should not have +cared. What difference could it make to me--or to you--what prefix you +put to my name?" + +"But I did not know you were married," I said almost sharply. + +She looked up, startled for a moment; but recovering, as from some vague +suspicion, in an instant she said, smiling a little, and with evident +relief, plunging into a new opening: + +"That had nothing to do with my case. There was no need to discuss +family relations. I never thought of whether _you_ were married or +not. You were my doctor--I your patient. What our family relations, +wardrobes, or political affiliations might be seem to me quite aside +from that. We may choose to talk of them together, or we may not, as +the case may be. And in my case, it would not be--edifying." There was +a moment's pause, then she said, rather impatiently, but as if the new +topic were a relief to her: "The idea that a woman must be ticketed as +married or unmarried, to every chance acquaintance, is repellent to me. +Men are not so ticketed--and that is right. It is vulgar to suppose a +sign is needed to prevent trespass, or to tempt approach. 'Miss Jones, +this is Mr. Smith.' What does it tell?" She was talking very rapidly +now--nervously. "It tells her, 'Here is a gentleman to whom I wish to +introduce you. If you find him agreeable you will doubtless learn more +of him later on.' It tells him, 'Here is a lady. _She is not married._ +Her family relations--her most private affairs--are thrust in his face +before she has even said good evening to him. I think it is vulgar, +and it is certainly an unnecessary personality. What his or her marital +relations may be would seem to come a good deal later in the stage of +acquaintance, don't you think so, doctor?" She laughed, but it was not +like herself. Even the laugh had changed. She was fighting for time. + +"It is a new idea to me," I said, "and I confess I like it. Come to +think of it, it _is_ a trifle premature--this thrusting a title intended +to indicate private relations onto a name used on all public occasions. +By Jove! it is absurd. I never thought of it before; but it is _never_ +done with men, is it? 'General,' 'Mr.' 'Dr.'--none of them. All relate +to him as an individual, leaving vast fields of possibilities all about +him. 'Mrs.' 'Miss'--they tell one thing, and one only. That is of a +private nature--a personal association. You have started me on a new +line of thought, and," said I, taking her hand again, "you have given +me so much that is new to think of to-night that I will go home to +look over the budget. You are tired out. Go to bed now. Order your tea +brought up. Here is an order to see to anything you may ask, promptly. +Beesley, the manager, is an old friend of mine. Any order you may give, +if you send it down with this note from me, will be obeyed at once. I +shall come to-morrow. Good-night." + +I put the order on the table, at her side. I know my voice was husky. +It startled me, as I heard it. She sat perfectly still, but she laid her +other hand on top of mine, with a light pressure, and her voice sounded +tired and full of tears. + +"Good-night. You are very kind--very thoughtful. I will be brave +to-morrow. Good-night." That night I drove past and saw a light in her +window at one o'clock. "Poor child!" I said; "will she be brave enough +to tell me to-morrow, or will she die with her burden, and her gay +little laugh on her lips?" + + + + +IV. + +The next day I called earlier than usual. I had spent an almost +sleepless night, wondering what I could do for this beautiful, lovable +woman, who seemed to be all alone in the world, and who evidently felt +that she must remain apart and desolate. + +What had caused her to leave her husband? Or had he left her? What for? +What kind of a man was he? Did she love him, and was she breaking her +heart for him? or did he stand between her and some other love? Had she +married young, and made a mistake that was eating her life out? Whose +fault was it? How could I help her? + +All these and a thousand other questions forced themselves upon me, and +none of the answers came to fit the case. Answers there were in plenty, +but they were not for these questions nor for this woman--not for this +delicate flower of her race. + +As I stepped into the hotel office to send my card to "Parlor 13," as +was my custom, the clerk looked up with his perfunctory smile and said, +"Go' morning, doctor. Got so in the habit 'coming here lately, s'pose +it'll take quite a while to taper off. That about the size of it?" + +I stared at the young man in utter bewilderment. + +"Ha! ha! ha! I believe you'd really forgot already she'd gone;" +and then, with a quick flash of surprise and intelligent, detective +shrewdness, "You knew she was going, doctor? She did not skip her little +bill, did she? Of course not. Her husband was in such a deuce of a hurry +to catch the early train, the night-clerk said he was ringing his bell +the blessed night for fear they'd get left. Front! take water to 273. +You hadn't been gone five minutes last night, when he came skipping down +here with your check and order, and we just had to make things hum to +get cash enough together to meet it for her; but we made it, and so they +got off all right." + +"Have you got my check here yet?" asked I, in in a tone that arrested +the attention of the other clerk, who looked up in surprise. + +"Good heavens! no. Do you think we're made of ready money, just because +you are? That check was in the bank and part of the cash in that desk +the first thing after banking hours," said he, opening out the register +and reaching for a bunch of pens behind him. "You see it cleaned us out +last night. I couldn't change two dollars for a man this morning. I told +Campbell last night that you must think hotels were run queer, to +expect us to cash a five-thousand dollar check on five minutes' notice. +Couldn't 'a' done it at all if 't hadn't been pay-night for servants and +the rest of us. We all had to wait till to-day. But the old man'll tell +you. Here he comes." + +"Why, hello! doctor, old boy," said Beesley, coming up from behind and +clapping me vigorously on the shoulder. "Didn't expect to see the light +of your countenance around here again so soon. Thought we owed it all +to your professional ardor for that charming patient of yours up in 13. +They got off all right, but if any other man but you had sent that order +and check down here for us to cash last night I'd have told him to +make tracks. Of course, I understood that they were called away +suddenly--unexpectedly, and all that. He told me all about it, and that +you did not finish the trade till the last minute; but--" + +"_Trade?_" gasped I, in spite of my determination to hear all before +disclosing anything. "Trade?" + +"Oh, come off. Don't be so consumedly skittish about the use of English, +I suppose you want me to say that the 'transaction between you was not +concluded,' etc., etc. Oh, you're a droll one, doctor." He appeared +to notice a change on my face, which he evidently misconstrued, and he +added, gayly. "Oh, it was all right, my boy, as long as it was you--glad +to do you a good turn any day; but what a queer idea for that little +woman to marry such a man! How did it happen? I'd like to know the +history! Every time I saw him come swelling around I made up mind to ask +you about them, and then I always forgot it when I saw you. When he told +me you had been his wife's guardian I thought some of kicking you the +next good chance I got, for allowing the match, and for not telling me +you had such a pretty ward. You always were a deep rascal--go off!" He +rattled on. + +Several times I had decided to speak, but as often restrained myself. My +blank face and unsettled manner appeared to touch his sense of humor. +He concluded that it was good acting. I decided to confirm the mistake, +until I had time to think it all over. Finally, I said, as carelessly as +I could: + +"How long had this--a--husband been here? That is--when did he get +back?" + +"Been here! get back! Been here all the time; smoked more good cigars +and surrounded more wine than any other one man in the house. Oh, he was +a Jim-dandy of a fellow for a hotel!" Then, with sudden suspicion: "Why? +Had he told you he'd go away before? Oh! I--see! _That_ was the trade? +Paid him to skip, hey? M--m--m--yes! I think I begin to catch on." He +could hardly restrain his mirth, and winked at me in sheer ecstasy. + +I went slowly out. When I arrived at the house I directed the servant to +say to anyone who might call that the doctor was not at home. I went +to my room and wrote to Dr. Griswold, asking him for information about +Florence Campbell, the fair patient he had sent me. "Who was she? What +did he know of her? Where were her friends?" I told him nothing of this +last development, but asked for an immediately reply, adding--"for an +important reason." + +Three days later a telegram was handed to me as I drove up to my office. +It was this: + +"Never heard of her. Why? Griswold?" + +I did not sleep that night. For the first time my faith in Florence +Campbell wavered. Up to that time I had blamed her husband for +everything. I had woven around her a web of plausible circumstances +which made her the unwilling victim of a designing villain--an expert +forger, no doubt, who used her, without her own knowledge, as a decoy--a +man of whom she was both ashamed and afraid, but from whom she could not +escape. + +But how was all that to be reconciled with this revelation? Griswold did +not know her. How about his introduction and that "sulph. 12"? I looked +through my desk for Griswold's note. It was certainly his handwriting; +but I noticed, for the first time, that it did not mention her name. + +Perhaps this was a loop-hole through which I might bring my fair +patient--in whom I was beginning to fear I had taken too deep an +interest--without discredit to herself. + +Might she not have changed her name since Griswold treated her? I +determined to give her the benefit of this doubt until I could be sure +that it had no foundation. + +I felt relieved by this respite, and, heartily ashamed of the unjust +suspicion of the moment before, I gave no hint of it in the letter I now +wrote Griswold, describing the lady, and in which I enclosed his letter +of introduction to me. + +The next few days I went about my practice in a dream, and it was no +doubt due to fortuitous circumstances rather than to my skill that +several of my patients still live to tell the tale of their suffering +and of my phenomenal ability to cope with disease in all its malignant +power. + + + + +V. + +In due time Griswold's letter came. I went into my office to read it. I +told myself that I had no fears for the good name of Florence Campbell. +I knew that some explanation would be made that would confirm me in my +opinion of her; but, for all that, I locked the door, and my hand was +less steady than I liked to see it, as I tore the end of the envelope. + +I even remember thinking vaguely that I usually took time to open my +letters with more precision and with less disregard for the untidy +appearance of their outer covering afterward. I hesitated to read beyond +the first line, although I had so hastened to get that far. I read: "My +dear old friend," and then turned the letter over to see how long it +was--how much probable information it contained. There were four closely +written pages. I wondered if it could all be about Florence Campbell, +and was vaguely afraid that it was--and that it was _not_. I remembered +looking at the clock when I came into the office. It was nearly six +o'clock. I laid the letter down and went to the cooler and got out +a bottle of Vichy. I sat it and (placed) some wine by my elbow on the +desk, and took up the letter. + +"I never heard of anyone by the name of Florence Campbell, so far as I +can recall. I certainly never had a patient by that name. Some months +ago I gave the letter you enclose--which I certainly did write--to a +patient of mine who was on her way to Europe and expected to stay some +time in New York on her way through. + +"She, however, was in no way like the lady you describe. Her name was +Kittie Hatfield, and she was small, with dreamy blue eyes and flaxen +hair--a _perfect_ woman, in fact." Oh! Tom! Tom! thought I--true to your +record, to the last! I had long since ceased to wonder at the lapse, +however, for Florence Campbell herself was surely sufficient explanation +of all that. "I understood"--the letter went on--"that Kittie did not +stop but a few days in New York, when she was joined by the party with +which she was to travel. She stayed at the F------ Avenue Hotel, I have +learned, and became intimate with some queer people there--much to the +indignation of her brother, when he learned of it." + +I laid the letter down and put my head on my arms, folded as they were +on the desk. I was dizzy and tired. When I raised my head it was dark. +I got up, lighted the gas, and found myself stiff and as if I had been +long in a forced and unnatural position. I recalled that I had been +indignant. + +This brother of the silly-pated, blue-eyed girl had not liked her +to know Florence Campbell, indeed! He was, no doubt, a precious +fool--naturally would be, with such a sister, I commented mentally. +What else, I wondered, had Griswold found out? Was the rest of this old +fool's letter about her? I began where I had left off. + +"I have since learned from him that the man--whose name _was_ +Campbell--was a foreigner of some kind, with a decidedly vague, not +to say, hazy reputation, and that his wife, who was supposed to be an +invalid, and an American of good family, never appeared in public, and +so was never seen by him--that is by Will Hatfield--but was only known +to him through Kittie's enraptured eyes. She was said to be bright and +pretty. Kittie is the most generous child alive in her estimate of other +women; however, he thinks it possible that Kittie either gave her the +letter from me to you, and asked her to have proper medical care, or +else that the woman, or her husband, got hold of it in a less legitimate +way; which I think quite likely. Kittie thought the Campbell woman was +charming." The "Campbell woman," indeed! I felt like a thief, even +to read such rubbish, and I should have enjoyed throttling the whole +ill-natured gossipping set--not omitting flaxen-haired Kittie herself. + +I determined to finish the letter, however. + +"Hatfield is so ashamed of his sister's friendship for the woman that +I had the utmost difficulty in making him tell me the whole truth, but, +from what I gathered yesterday, he thinks them most likely the head of a +gang of counterfeiters or forgers and--" + +I read no further, or, if I did, I can recall only that. It was burned +into my brain, and when a loud pounding on my office-door aroused me, I +found the letter twisted and torn into a hundred pieces, the Vichy and +wine-bottles at my side half-empty, and the hands of the clock pointing +to half-past ten. + +"Doctor, doctor," called my lackey; "oh, doctor! Oh, lord, I'm afraid +something's wrong with the doctor, but I'm afraid to break in the door." + +I went to the door to prevent a scene. One of my best patients stood +there, with Morgan, the man. Both of them were pale and full of +suppressed excitement. + +"Heavens and earth, doctor, we were afraid you were dead. I've been +waiting here a good hour for you to come home. No one knew you were in, +till Morgan peeped over the transom. What in the devil is the matter?" +said my patient. + +"Tired out, went to sleep," said I; but I did not know my own voice as I +spoke. It sounded distant, and its tones were strange. + +They both looked at me suspiciously, and with evident anxiety as to my +mental condition. I caught at the means of escape. + +"I am too tired to see anyone to-night. In fact, I am not well. You will +have to let me off this time. Get Dr. Talbott, next door, if anyone is +sick; I am going to bed. Good-night." + +There was a long pause. Then he said, wearily: "You are a young man, +doctor. You have taken the chair I left vacant at the college. I would +never have told the story to you, perhaps, only I wanted you to know why +I left the class in your care so suddenly this morning, when I uncovered +the beautiful face of the 'subject' you had brought from the morgue for +me to give my closing lecture upon. That class of shallow-pated fellows +have not learned yet that doctors--even old fellows like me--know a +good deal less than they think they do about the human race--themselves +included." + +I stammered some explanation of the circumstances, and again there was a +long silence. + +Then he said: + +"Found drowned, was she? Poor girl! Do you believe, with that face, she +was ever a bad woman? Or that she had anything to do with the rascality +of her husband, even if he were consciously a rascal? and who is to +judge of that, knowing so little of him? Did I ever recover the five +thousand dollars? Did I attempt to recover it? Oh, no. All this happened +nearly ten years ago now; and if that were all it had cost me I should +not mind. The hotel people never knew. Why should they? This is the +first time I have told the story. You think I am an old fool? Well, +well, perhaps I am--perhaps I am; who can say what any of us are, or +what we are not? Thirty years ago I knew that I understood myself and +everybody else perfectly. To-day I know equally well that I understand +neither the one nor the other. We learn that fact, and then we die--and +that is about all we do learn. You wonder, after what I tell you, if the +beautiful face at the demonstration class this morning was really hers, +or whether a strong likeness led my eyes and nerves astray You wonder if +she drowned herself, and why? Was it an accident? Did _he_ do it? This +last will be decided by each one according as he judges of Florence +Campbell and her husband--of who and what they were. Perhaps I shall +try to find him now. Not for the money, but to learn why she married the +man he seemed to be. It is hard to tell what I should learn. It is not +even easy to know just what I should _like_ to learn; and perhaps, after +all, it is better not to know more--who shall say?" + +And the doctor bade me good-night and bowed himself out to his carriage +with his old courtesy, and left me alone with the strange, sad story of +the beautiful girl whose lifeless form had furnished the subject of my +first lecture to a class of medical students. + + + + +MY PATIENTS STORY. + + _"Things are cruel and blind; their strength detains and deforms: + And the wearying wings of the mind still beat up the stream of their storms. + Still, as one swimming up stream, they strike out blind in the blast. + In thunders of vision and dream, and lightning of future and past. + We are baffled and caught in the current, and bruised upon edges of shoals; + As weeds or as reeds in the torrent of things are the wind-shaken souls."_ + + Algernon Charles Swinburne. + + + + +I. + +Perhaps I may have told you before, that at the time of which I speak, +my Summer home--where I preferred to spend much more than half of the +year--was on a sandy beach a few miles out of New York, and also that I +had retired from active practice as a physician, even when I was in the +city. + +Notwithstanding these two facts, I was often called in consultation, +both in and out of the city; and was occasionally compelled to take a +case entirely into my own hands, through some accident or unforeseen +circumstance. + +It was one of these accidents which brought the patient whose story I am +about to tell you, under my care. + +I can hardly say now, why I retained the case instead of turning it over +to some brother practitioner, as was my almost invariable habit; but for +some reason I kept it in my own hands, and, as it was the only one for +which I was solely responsible at the time, I naturally took more than +ordinary interest in and paid more than usual attention to all that +seemed to me to bear upon it. + +As you know I am an "old school" or "regular" physician, although that +did not prevent me from consulting with, and appreciating the strong +points of many of those who were of other, and younger branches of the +profession. + +This peculiarity had subjected me, in times gone by, to much adverse +criticism from some of my colleagues who belonged to that rigidly +orthodox faction which appears to feel that it is a much better thing +to allow a patient to die "regularly"--as it were--than it is to join +forces with one, who, being of us, is still not with us in theory and +practice. + +Recognizing that we were all purblind at best, and that there was and +still is, much to learn in every department of medicine, it did not +always seem to me that it was absolutely necessary to reject, without +due consideration, the guesses of other earnest and careful men, even +though they might differ from me in the prefix to the "pathy" which +forms the basis of the conjecture. + +We are all wrong so often that it has never appeared to be a matter +of the first importance--it does not present itself to my mind as +absolutely imperative--that it should be invariably the same wrong, or +that all of the mistakes should necessarily follow the beaten track of +the "old school." + +I had arrived at that state of beatitude where I was not unwilling for +a life to be saved--or even for pain to be alleviated, by other methods +than my own. + +I do not pretend that this exalted ethical status came to me all at +once, nor at a very early stage of my career; but it came, and I had +reaped the whirlwind of wrath, as I have just hinted to you. + +So when my patient let me know, after a time, that he had been used to +homeopathic treatment, I at once suggested that he send for some one of +that school to take charge of his case. + +He declined--somewhat reluctantly, I thought, still, quite positively. +But, in the course of events, when I felt that a consultation was due +to him as well as to myself, I asked him if he would not prefer that the +consulting physician should be of that school. + +He admitted that he would, and I assured him that I should be pleased to +send for any one he might name. + +He knew no doctor here, he said, and left it to me to send for the one +in whom I had the greatest confidence. + +It is at this point my story really begins. + +I stopped on my way uptown to arrange, with Dr. Hamilton, of Madison +Avenue, a consultation that afternoon, at three o'clock. I told the +doctor all that I, myself, knew at that time, of my patient's history. +Three weeks before I had been in a Fifth Avenue stage; a gentleman had +politely arisen to offer his seat to a lady at the moment that the stage +gave a sudden lurch which threw them both violently against each other +and against the end of the stage. + +He broke the fall for her; but he received a blow on the head, +which member came in contact with the money-box, with a sharp crack. +Accustomed to the sight of pain and suffering as I was, the sound of the +blow and his suddenly livid face gave me a feeling of sickness which did +not wholly leave me for an hour afterward. Involuntarily I caught him in +my arms--he was a slightly built man--and directed the driver to stop +at the first hotel. + +The gentleman was unconscious and I feared he had sustained a serious +fracture of the skull. He was evidently a man of culture, and I thought +not an American. I therefore wished, if possible, to save him a police +or hospital experience. + +By taking him into the first hotel I reasoned, we could examine him; +learn who and what he was, where he lived, and, after reviving him, send +him home in a carriage. + +The process of bringing him back to consciousness was slow, and as the +papers on his person, which we felt at liberty to examine, gave no clue +to his residence, we concluded to put him to bed and trust to farther +developments to show us what to do in the matter of removal. The lady +on whose account he had received the injury had given me her card, which +bore a name well known on the Avenue, and had stated that she would, if +necessary, be responsible for all expense at the hotel. + +It was deemed best, therefore, to put him to bed, as I said before, and +wait for him to indicate, for himself, the next move. I placed in the +safe of the hotel his pocketbook, which contained a large sum of money +(large that is, for a man to carry on his person in these days of +cheques and exchanges) and his watch, which was a handsome one, with +this inscription on the inside cover, "T. C. from Florence." + +The cards in his pocket bore different names and addresses, mostly +foreign, but the ones I took for his own were finely engraved, and +read "Mr. T. C. Lathro," nothing more. No address, no business; simply +calling cards, of a fashionable size, and of the finest quality. + +This, as I say, was about three weeks before I concluded to call Dr. +Hamilton in consultation; and I had really learned very little more of +my patient's affairs than these facts taken from his pocket that first +day while he was still unconscious. + +He was silent about himself, and while he had slowly grown better his +progress toward health did not satisfy me, nor do I think that he was +wholly of opinion, that I was doing quite all that should be done to +hasten his recovery. + +He was always courteous, self-poised, and able to bear pain bravely; but +I thought he watched me narrowly, and I several times detected him in +a weary sigh and an impatient movement of the eyebrows, which did not +tally with his assumption of cheerful indifference and hospitality. + +I use the word hospitality advisedly, for his effort always seemed to +be to treat me as a guest whom he must entertain, and distract from +observing his ailments, rather than as a physician whose business it was +to discover and remedy them. + +He had declined to be moved; said he was a stranger; had no preferences +as to hotels; felt sure this one was as comfortable as any; thanked me +over and over for having taken him there, and changed the subject. +He would talk as long as I would allow him on any subject, airily, +brightly, readily. On any subject, that is, except himself; yet from his +conversation I had gathered that he had travelled a great deal; was a +man of wealth and culture, whether French, Italian or Russian, I could +not decide. He spoke all of these languages, and words from each fitted +easily into place when for a better English one, he hesitated or was at +a loss. + +Indeed, he seemed to have seen much of every country and to have +observed impartially--without national prejudice. He knew men well, too +well to praise recklessly; and he sometimes gave me the impression, I +can hardly say how, that blame was a word whose meaning he did not know. + +He spoke of having seen deeds of the most appalling nature in Russia, +and talked of their perpetrators sometimes, as good and brave men. He +never appeared to measure men by their exceptional acts. + +Occasionally I contested these points with him, and I am not sure but +that it may have been the interest I took in his conversation that held +me as his physician; for as I said, I was well aware that he did not +improve as he should have done after the first few days. + +But I liked to hear him talk. He was a revelation to me. I greatly +enjoyed his breath and charity--if I may so express the mental attitude +which recognized neither the possession of, nor the need for, either +quality in his judgments of his fellow-men. + +He had evidently not been able to pass through life under the impression +that character, like cloth, is cut to fit a certain outline, and that +after the basting-threads are once in, no farther variation need be +looked for. Indeed, I question if he would have been able to comprehend +the mental condition of those grown-up "educated" children who are +never able to outgrow the comfortable belief that words and acts have +a definite, inflexible, par-value--that an unabridged dictionary, so to +speak, is an infallible appeal; who, in short, expect their villains to +be consistently and invariably villainous, in the regulation orthodox +fashion. + +Individual shades of meaning, whether of language or of character, +do not enter into their simple philosophy. Mankind suffers, in their +pennyweight scales, a shrinkage that is none the less real because +they never suspect that the dwarfage may be due to themselves--to their +system of weights and measures. All variations from their standard +indicate an unvarying tendency to mendacity. He whom they once detect in +a quibble, or in an attempt to acquire the large end of a bargain, never +recovers (what is perhaps only his rightful heritage, in spite of an +occasional lapse) the respect and confidence of these primer students +who are inflexible judges of all mental and moral manifestations. + +I repeat that this comfortable and regular philosophy was foreign to my +patient's mental habits, and I began to consider, the more I talked +with him, that it did not agree with my own personal observations. I +reflected that I was not very greatly surprised, nor did I lose faith +in a man necessarily, when I discovered him in a single mean or +questionable action. + +Why, then, should I be surprised to find those of whom I had known only +ill-engaged in deeds of the most unselfish nature? Deeds of heroism and +generosity such as he often recounted as a part of the life of some of +these same terrible Russian officials. There seems, however, to be that +in us which finds it far easier to reconcile a single mean or immoral +action with an otherwise upright life, than to believe it likely, or +even possible, for a depraved nature to perform, upon occasion, deeds of +exalted or unusual purity. Yet so common is the latter, that its failure +of recognition by humanity in general can be due it seems to me, only to +a wrong teaching or to a stupidity beyond even normal bounds. + +For, after all, the bad man who is all bad, is really a less frequent +product than that much talked of, but rare creature, a perfect woman. +Perhaps one could count the specimens of either of these to be met with +in a life time, on the fingers of one hand. + +But to return to my patient and his story. + +It was of these things that he and I had often talked, and I had come +to greatly respect the self-poise and acute observation, as well as the +broad human sympathy of this reserved and evidently sad-hearted man. +Sad-hearted I knew, in spite of his keen sense of humor, and his firm +grasp of philosophy. + +I gave Dr. Hamilton a brief outline of all this, as well as of the +physical condition of the man whom he was to see; for I believe it to be +quite as important for a physician to understand and diagnose the mental +as the physical conditions of those who come under his care before he +can prescribe intelligently for other than very trifling ailments. + +You can imagine my surprise when I tell you that the moment Dr. Hamilton +stepped into the room, and I mentioned his name, my patient, this +self-poised man of the world, whose nerves had often seemed to me to be +of tempered steel, looked up suddenly as you have seen a timid child do +when it is sharply reproved, and fainted dead away. + + + + +II. + +I confess that I expected a scene. + +I glanced at the doctor, but he showed no sign of ever having seen my +patient before, and went to work with me in the most methodical and +indifferent way possible to revive him. + +"You did not mention that this was one of his symptoms--a peculiarity +of his. Has he been subject to this sort of thing? Did he say he was +subject to it before he hurt his head, or has it developed since?" the +doctor inquired quietly as we worked. + +I bit my lip. His tone was so exasperatingly cool, while, knowing my +patient as I did, his startled manner and sudden fainting had impressed +me deeply. + +"It is the first time," I said, "since he was hurt--that is, since +he recovered consciousness after the blow--that he has exhibited the +slightest tendency to anything of the kind." + +I hesitated, then I said: "Doctor, if you know him; if this is the +result of seeing you suddenly (for he did not know who was to come) +don't you think--would it be well?--Do you think it best for you to be +where he will see you when he begins to revive?" + +The doctor stared at me, then at my patient. "I don't know him--never +saw him before in my life so far as I know. What did you say his name +is? Mum--oh, yes, Lathro--first and only time I ever heard it. Oh, no, +I suppose his nerves are weak. The excitement of seeing me--the idea +of--a--er--consultation." I smiled, involuntarily. "You don't know the +man, doctor," said I. "He is bomb proof as to nerves in that sense of +the word. He--a--There must be some other reason. He must have mistaken +you for some one else. I am sorry to trouble you, doctor, but would you +kindly step into the other room? He will open his eyes now, you see." + +When, a moment later, my patient regained consciousuess, he glanced +about him furtively, like a hunted man. He did not look like himself. + +He examined my face closely--suspiciously, I thought--for a moment. Then +I laughed lightly, and said: "Well, old fellow, you've been trying your +hand at a faint. That's a pretty way to treat a friend. I come in to see +you; you step out to nobody knows where--to no man's land--and give me +no end of trouble rowing you back to our shore. What did you eat for +dinner that served you that kind of a trick?" + +He looked all about the room again, examined my face, and then smiled, +for the first time since I had known him, nervously, and said: + +"I think my digestion must be pretty badly out of order. I'll declare +I saw double when you came in. I thought there were two of you; and the +other one--wasn't you." + +I laughed; "That is good. Two of me, but the other one wasn't me. Well, +thank heaven there is only one of me up to date." + +He smiled, but seemed disturbed still. I decided to ask him a direct +question: + +"Well now, just suppose there had been two of me--is that an excuse for +you to faint? Does associating with one of me try you to that extent +that two of me would prostrate you?" + +He did not take me up with his old manner. He was listless and absent. +I said that I would go down to the office and order some wine and return +at once. I slipped into the other room, and with my finger on my lips +motioned to Dr. Hamilton to pass out quietly before me. + +I followed him. "There is something wrong, Doctor," I said: "I am sorry, +but I shall have to ask you to go without seeing him again. I can't +tell you why yet, but I'll try to find out and let you know. Order some +champagne sent up to me, please, as you go out, and I will see you as +soon as I can." + +The moment I re-entered the room, my patient, whose restless eyes met +mine as I opened the door, said: "I thought you were talking to some +one." + +"I was," said I carelessly; a bell-boy, "I ordered wine. It will be up +soon." Then I changed the subject; but he was nervous and unlike himself +and none of the old topics interested him. + +When the door opened for the boy with the wine an expression of actual +terror passed over my patient's face. When I left him a half hour later +I was puzzled and anxious. + + + + +III. + +The moment I entered his room on the following day he said: "I +thought you had planned to have another doctor come and look me over, +yesterday." He was watching me closely as he spoke: "Did I hear you +mention his name?" + +Ah, thought I, here _is_ a mystery in spite of Dr. Hamilton's denial. I +will try him. + +"Yes," I said, "I had decided to ask the best Homeopathic doctor I know, +a skilful man, especially successful in diagnosing cases, to overhaul +you and see if he agrees with me that you ought to be on your feet this +blessed minute, if my diagnosis of your case is entirely right. I +don't see why you are still so weak. He may find the spring that I have +missed. Why?" + +"Did you--I am not acquainted with the doctors here,--I think you said +his name is--?" + +"I have not mentioned his name to you," I said, "but the one I had in +mind is Dr. Hamilton of---- Madison Avenue." + +There was no doubt about it, the color rose slowly to his face, and he +was struggling for self-control. At length he said: "No, I do not +wish to see another doctor. I am perfectly satisfied with you. I am--I +say--no, positively do not ask him; that is, do not ask anyone to come +unless I know and definitely agree to it. And I certainly shall want to +know who he is first." + +All this was wholly foreign to the man, to his nature and habit. + +"Tell me," I said, "what you have against Dr. Hamilton, for I cannot +fail to see that there is something behind all this." + +He did not reply for some time; then he said wearily, but with great +depth of feeling. + +"I suppose I may as well tell you. I cannot forgive him for an injury I +did him long ago." + +I did not say anything nor did I look at him. Presently he went on +hoarsely; "If I had only injured him, perhaps I could get over it but +I took a mean advantage of--I did it through a woman who liked him--and +whom he--loved and trusted." There was another long silence; then I +said; "You were right to tell me, Lathro. You need not fear that I will +betray you to him, and he does not know you. He did not recognize you +either before or after you fainted. Of course I knew there was something +wrong. He will not come again." + +He sprang to his feet, and a wave of red surged into his face. "I knew +it! I knew I had seen him! I was sure it was not a delusion," he said. +"He was here. No, he would not know me. He never saw me. I did not +injure him like a man, I struck from behind a woman. A woman who cared +for his respect, and I let him blame her. I suppose I could get over it +if it were not for that. I came back here partly to let him know, if +I could some way, that she was not to blame"--there was another +long silence--"and partly to get rid of myself. Russia did not do +it,--Turkey,--France--none of them. I thought perhaps he would--I had +some sort of a wild idea that he might settle with me some way. I have +carried that forged cheque in my brain, until--" + +I started visibly. I had had no idea that it was so bad as this. I +changed my position to hide or cover the involuntary movement I had +made, but he had seen it and the color died out of his face. He +forced himself to begin again. "I carried that forged check," he was +articulating now with horrible distinctness, "wherever I went. She never +knew anything about it. She knew I was--she thought, or feared, that I +might be somewhat--what you Americans call crooked; but she did not know +the truth, not until the very last. She knew that I had been unreliable +in some ways long ago; but she did not dream of the worst. At +last,--sometimes I think I was a fool to have done it,--but I told her. +I told her the whole truth, and--she left me. She had borne everything +till then. I think she came here. Before long I followed. She told me +not to, and I said I would not; but of course I did. I could not help +it. I knew then, and I know now, that I am putting myself into the +clutches of the law; but I do not care--not now-- since I cannot find +Florence Campbell." + +He pronounced the name as if it were a treasure wrung from him by force. +"It is the only really criminal thing I ever did. I do not know why +I did it. They say that crime--a taste for it, develops slowly, by +degrees. Maybe so; but not with me, not with me. + +"I had money enough; but--oh, my God! how I hated him. I saw that he +was growing to love her without knowing it. I often heard them talking +together. They did not know it, and if they had it could not have been +more innocent; but I was madly jealous, for the first time in my life. +I determined to make him think ill of her, and yet I said just now that +forgery was my only crime. That was worse, by far, but I believe it is +not a crime in law." + +He smiled scornfully. "I have outgrown all that now. The storm has +left me the wreck you see; but I thought it all out last night, and +determined to tell you. You are to tell--him--for her sake," he said +between his set teeth. + +"He may see her yet some day. She will never return to me--God bless +her! God help us both!" + +"No, she will never return to you nor to anyone else," I said, as gently +as I could. + +He sprang up with the energy of a maniac. "How do you know? What do you +know?" he demanded. + +"I only know that she is dead, my friend," I said, placing my hand on +his arm, "and that Dr. Hamilton does not wish to punish you. I heard it +all; the story of the forgery of his name, and that a Florence Campbell +was in some way connected with it. I heard it from him long, long ago; +but he does not know that you are Tom Campbell. You are safe." + +"Does not wish to punish me! I am safe! Great God, no one could punish +me. I do that. Safe! Oh, the irony of language!" + +There was a long pause. He had gone to the window and was staring out +into the darkness. + +Presently the sound of convulsive sobbing filled the room; I thought +best to remain near the door and make no effort to check his grief with +words. + +At last the storm spent itself. He came slowly into the middle of the +room and stood facing me. At length he said: + +"One of the greatest punishments is gone, thank God. Florence Campbell +is dead, you say. Do you know what it is, Doctor, to wish that one you +loved was dead?" + +"Yes, yes." I said; "but it is best for you not to talk any more--nor +think, just now--not of that--not of that." + +He broke in impatiently--"Don't you know me well enough yet to know that +that sort of thing--that sort of professional humbug is useless? Must +not talk more of that--nor think of it, indeed! What else do you suppose +I ever think of? The good men who are bad and the bad ones who are +good--the puppets of our recent conversations? Suppose we boil it down a +little. Am I a bad man? That is a question that puzzles me. Am I a good +one? At least I can answer _that_--and yet I never did but one criminal +deed in my whole life, and I have done a great many so-called good ones +to set over against it." + +"Then you can answer neither question with a single word," I said. He +took my hand and pressed it with the frenzy of a new hope. + +"At least one man's philosophy is not all words," he said. "You act upon +your theories. You are the only one I ever knew who did." + +"Perhaps I am the only one you ever gave the chance," I replied, still +holding his hand. + +We stood thus silent for a moment, then he said with an inexpressible +accent of satire: "Would you advise me to try it, doctor, with anyone +else?" I deliberated some time before I replied. Then I said: "No, I am +sorry to say that I fear it would not be safe. There is still so much +tiger in the human race. No, do not tell your story again to any one; it +can do no good. Most certainly I would advise you _not_ to try it ever +again." + +As I left the room he said: "True, true. It can do no good, none +whatever." + +The next day he left. I never saw him again. Two years later I received +a kind letter from him in which he greatly over-estimated all I had done +for him. The letter came from St. Petersburg and was signed "T. Lathro +Campbell, Col. Imperial Guard." + +I fancied, in spite of his letter, that he would rather sever all +connection with this country, and feel that he had no ties nor past; so +I never answered his letter. + +Sometimes I wonder if he misunderstood my silence, and accepted it as a +token of unfriendliness--and yet--well, I have never been able to decide +just what would be least painful to him; so I let it drift into years of +silence, and perhaps, after all, these very good intentions of mine may +be only cobble-stones added to the paving of the streets of a certain +dread, but very populous city which is, in these days of agnosticism +quite a matter of jest in polite society. + +Who shall say? Which would he prefer, friendly communication or silence +and forgetfulness? + + +THE END + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Thoughtless Yes, by Helen H. 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Gardener + </title> + <style type="text/css" xml:space="preserve"> + + body { margin:5%; background:#faebd0; text-align:justify} + P { text-indent: 1em; margin-top: .25em; margin-bottom: .25em; } + H1,H2,H3,H4,H5,H6 { text-align: center; margin-left: 15%; margin-right: 15%; } + hr { width: 50%; text-align: center;} + .foot { margin-left: 20%; margin-right: 20%; text-align: justify; text-indent: -3em; font-size: 90%; } + blockquote {font-size: 97%; font-style: italic; margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%;} + .mynote {background-color: #DDE; color: #000; padding: .5em; margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 95%;} + .toc { margin-left: 10%; margin-bottom: .75em;} + .toc2 { margin-left: 20%;} + div.fig { display:block; margin:0 auto; text-align:center; } + div.middle { margin-left: 20%; margin-right: 20%; text-align: justify; } + .figleft {float: left; margin-left: 0%; margin-right: 1%;} + .figright {float: right; margin-right: 0%; margin-left: 1%;} + .pagenum {display:inline; font-size: 70%; font-style:normal; + margin: 0; padding: 0; position: absolute; right: 1%; + text-align: right;} + pre { font-style: italic; font-size: 90%; margin-left: 10%;} + +</style> + </head> + <body> + + +<pre> + +The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Thoughtless Yes, by Helen H. Gardener + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: A Thoughtless Yes + +Author: Helen H. Gardener + +Release Date: March 13, 2013 [EBook #18892] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A THOUGHTLESS YES *** + + + + +Produced by David Widger + + + + + +</pre> + + <div style="height: 8em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h1> + A THOUGHTLESS YES + </h1> + <h2> + By Helen H. Gardener + </h2> + <p> + <br /> + </p> + <blockquote> + <p> + Author Of + </p> + <p> + "Men, Women, and Gods;" "Sex in Brain;" "Pulpit, Pew, and Cradle;" "Is + this Your Son, my Lord?" "Pushed by Unseen Hands," "Pray you, Sir, whose + Daughter?" "An Unofficial Patriot," and "Facts and Fictions of Life." + </p> + </blockquote> + <p> + <br /> + </p> + <h4> + Tenth Edition. <br /> <br /> Copyright, 1890, + </h4> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0001" id="link2H_4_0001"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + Dedication. + </h2> + <p> + To the many strangers who, after reading such of these stories as have + before been printed, have written me letters that were thoughtful or gay + or sad, I dedicate this volume. + </p> + <p> + These letters have come from far and near; from rich and from poor; from + Christian and from unbeliever; from a bishop's palace and from behind + prison walls. + </p> + <p> + If this collection of stories shall give to my friends, known and unknown, + as much pleasure and mental stimulus as their letters gave to me, I shall + be content. + </p> + <p> + HELEN H. GARDENER. + </p> + <p> + <br /> <br /> + </p> + <hr /> + <p> + <br /> <br /> + </p> + <h3> + Contents + </h3> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0001"> Dedication. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_TOC"> CONTENTS </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_PREF"> PREFACE TO THE EIGHTH EDITION. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0003"> AN OPEN LETTER. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0004"> A SPLENDID JUDGE OF A WOMAN. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0005"> THE LADY OF THE CLUB. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0006"> I. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0007"> II. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0008"> III. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0009"> UNDER PROTEST. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0010"> FOR THE PROSECUTION. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0011"> I. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0012"> II. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0013"> III. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0014"> A RUSTY LINK IN THE CHAIN. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0015"> THE BOLER HOUSE MYSTERY. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0016"> THE TIME LOCK OF OUR ANCESTORS. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0017"> FLORENCE CAMPBELL'S FATE. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0018"> I. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0019"> II. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0020"> III. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0021"> IV. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0022"> V. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0023"> MY PATIENTS STORY. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0024"> I. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0025"> II. </a> + </p> + <p class="toc2"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0026"> III. </a> + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_TOC" id="link2H_TOC"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <p> + <a name="link2H_PREF" id="link2H_PREF"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + PREFACE TO THE EIGHTH EDITION. + </h2> + <p> + In issuing a new edition of this book, it has been thought wise to state + that an unauthorized edition is now on the market, and it is desirable + that the public shall know that all copies of this book not bearing the + imprint of the Commonwealth Company are sold against the will and in + violation of the rights of the author. + </p> + <p> + Since some persons have been puzzled to make the connection between the + title of the book and the stories themselves, and to apply Colonel + Ingersoll's exquisite autograph sentiment more clearly, a part of "An Open + Letter," which was written in reply to an editorial review of the book + when it first appeared, is here reprinted, in the hope that it may remove + the difficulty for all. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0003" id="link2H_4_0003"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + AN OPEN LETTER. + </h2> + <p> + I have, this morning, read your review of "A Thoughtless Yes." I wish to + thank you for the pleasant things said and also to make the connection—which + I am surprised to see did not present itself to your mind—between + the title and the burden of the stories or sketches. + </p> + <p> + It is not so easy as you may suppose to get a title which shall be exactly + and fully descriptive of a collection of tales or sketches, each one of + which was written to suggest thoughts and questions on some particular + topic or topics to which people usually pay the tribute of a thoughtless + yes. With one—possibly two—exceptions each sketch means to + suggest to the reader that there may be a very large question mark put + after many of the social, religious, economic, medical, journalistic, or + legal fiats of the present civilization. + </p> + <p> + You say that "in 'The Lady of the Club' she [meaning me] does not show how + poverty results from a thoughtless yes. Perhaps she does not see that it + does." I had in my mind exactly that point when I wrote the story and when + I decided upon the title for the book. No, I do not attempt in such + sketches to show <i>how</i>, but to show <i>that</i>, such and such + conditions exist and that it is wrong. I want to suggest a question of the + justice and the right of several things; but I want to leave each person + free to think out, not my conclusion or remedy, but a conclusion and a + remedy, and at all events to make him refuse, henceforth, the thoughtless + yes of timid acquiescence to things as they are simply because they are. + In the "Lady of the Club" I meant to attack the impudent authority that + makes such a condition of poverty possible, by calling sympathetic + attention to its workings. There are one or two other ideas sustained by + authority, to which, to the readers of that tale, I wished to make a + thoughtless yes henceforth impossible. At least I hoped to arouse a + question. One is taxation of church property. I wished to point out that + by shirking their honest debts churches heap still farther poverty and + burden upon the poor. I hoped, too, to suggest that the idea of "charity," + to which most people give a warmly thoughtless yes, must be an indignity + or impossibility where, even they would say, it was most needed. I wanted + to call attention to the fact that a physician and a man of tender heart + and lofty soul were compelled to make themselves criminals, before the + law, to even be kind to the dead. That conditions are so savage under the + present system that such a case is absolutely hopeless while the victims + live and outrageous after they are dead. To all of these dictates of + impudent authority, to which most story readers pay the tribute of a + thoughtless yes, I wanted to call attention in such a way that henceforth + a question must arise in their minds. I hoped to show, too, that even so + lofty a character as Roland Barker was tied hand and foot—until it + made him almost a madman—by a system of economics and religion and + law which so interlace as to sustain each other and combine to not only + crush the poor but to prevent the rich from helping along even where they + desire to do so. + </p> + <p> + These were the main points upon which that particular tale was intended to + arouse a mental attitude of thoughtful protest There are other, minor + ones, which I need not trouble you to recall. If you will notice, nearly + all of the tales end (or stop without an end) with an open question for + the reader to settle—to settle his way, not mine. Indeed, I am not + yet convinced that my own ideas of the changes needed and the way to bring + them about are infallible. I am still open to conviction. I have tried to + grasp the Socialist, Communist, Anarchist, Single-tax, Free-land, and + other ideas and to comprehend just what each could be fairly expected to + accomplish if established—to see the <i>pros</i> and <i>cons</i> of + these and other schemes for social improvement. These, and the varying + cults ranged between, each seems to me to have certain strong points and + certain weak ones. Each seems to me to overlook some essential feature; + and yet I have no system to offer that I think would be better or would + work better than some of these. Indeed, I do most earnestly believe that + <i>the</i> inspired way is yet to be struck out, and I do not believe that + I am the one to do it Meanwhile I can do some things. I can suggest + questions, and, sometimes, answers. But I am not a god, and I do not want + all people to answer my way. I do want to help prevent, now and + henceforth, the tribute of a thoughtless yes from being given to a good + many established wrongs. + </p> + <p> + Since such able thinkers as you are have—in the main—already + refused such tribute, I am perfectly satisfied to let each of these answer + the questions I have suggested or may suggest in my fiction in the way + that seems most hopeful to him. + </p> + <p> + Meantime, the vast majority of story readers have not yet had their + emotions touched by the dramatic presentation of "the other side." Fiction + has—in the main—worked to make them accept without question + all things as authority has presented them. Who knows but that a lofty + discontent may be stirred in some soul who can solve the awful problems + and at the same time reconcile the various cults of warring philosophers + so that they may combine for humanity and cease to divide for revenue—or + personal pique? I do not believe that the province of a story is to assume + to give the solution of philosophical questions that have puzzled and + proved too much for the best and ablest brains. I have no doubt that + fiction may stir and arouse to thought many who cannot understand and will + not heed essays or argument or preaching, while it may also present the + same thoughts in a new light to those who do. Personally I do not believe + in tacking on to fiction a "moral" or an "in conclusion" which shall + switch all such aroused thoughts into one channel. Clear thinking and + right feeling may lead some one, who is new to such protest, to solutions + that I have not reached. So let us each question "impudent authority," + whether it be in its stupid blindness to heredity or to environment; and I + shall be content that you solve the new order by an appeal to Anarchism <i>via</i> + free land; or that Matilda Joslyn Gage solve it by the ballot for women + and hereditary freedom from slavish instincts stamped upon a race bom of + superstitious and subject mothers. + </p> + <p> + Personally I do not believe that all the free land, free money or freedom + in the world, which shall leave the mothers of the race (whether in or out + of marriage) a subject class or in a position to transmit to their + children the vices or weaknesses of a dominated dependent, will ever + succeed in populating the world with self-reliant, self-respecting, + honorable and capable people. + </p> + <p> + On the other hand, I do not see how the ballot in the hands of woman will + do for her all that many believe it will. That it is her right and would + go far is clear; but after that, your question of economics touches her in + a way that it does not and cannot touch men, and I am free to confess that + as yet I have heard of no economic or social plan that would not of + necessity, in my opinion, bear heaviest upon those who are mothers. So you + will see that when I suggested the desirability in "For the Prosecution" + of having mothers on the bench and as jurors where a case touched points + no man living does or can understand in all its phases, I do not think + that would right all the wrong nor solve all the questions suggested by + such a trial; but I thought it would help push the car of right and + justice in the direction of light which we all hope is ahead. + </p> + <p> + You believe more in environment than in heredity; I believe in both, and + that both are sadly and awfully awry, largely because too many people in + too many ways pay to impudent authority the tribute of a thoughtless yes. + </p> + <p> + It is one of the saddest things in this world to see the brave and earnest + men who fight so nobly for better and fairer economic conditions for + "Labor," pay, much too often, the tribute of a thoughtless yes to the + absolute pauper status of all womanhood They resent with spirit the idea + that men should labor for a mere subsistence and always be dependent upon + and at the financial mercy of the rich. They do not appear to see that to + one-half of the race even that much economic independence would be a + tremendous improvement upon her present status. How would Singletax or + Free-land help this? You may reply that Anarchism would solve that + problem. Would it? With maternity and physical disabilities in the scale? + To my mind, all the various economic schemes yet put forward lack an + essential feature. They provide for a free and better manhood, but they + pay the tribute of a thoughtless yes to impudent authority in the case of + womanhood, in many things. And so long as motherhood is serfhood, just so + long will this world be populated with a race easy to subjugate, weak to + resist oppression, criminal in its instincts of cruelty toward those in + its power, and humble and subservient toward authority and domination. + Character rises but little above its source. The mother molds the man. If + she have the status, the instincts, and the spirit of a subordinate, she + will transmit these, and the more enlightened she is the surer is this, + because of her consciousness of her own degradation. + </p> + <p> + Look at the Kemmler horror. People all marvel at his "brutish nature and + his desire to kill." No one says anything about the fact, which was merely + mentioned at his trial, that his "father was a butcher and his mother + helped in the business." Did you know that this is also true of Jesse + Pomeroy; the boy who "from infancy tortured animals and killed whatever he + could?" + </p> + <p> + Would all this sort of thing mean absolutely nothing to women of the same + social and scientific status enjoyed by the men who assisted at the trials + of these two and at the legal murder of one? In ordinary women, of course, + it would not stir very deep thought But these were not ordinary men. They + were far more than that, Almost all the women who have spoken or written + to me of the Kemmler horror have touched that thought Have you heard a man + discuss it? Is there a reason for this? Do we pay the tribute of a + thoughtless yes to all that clusters about the present ideas on such + subjects and about their criminal medicolegal aspects? But this letter + grows too long. + </p> + <p> + With great respect and hearty good wishes, + </p> + <p> + I am sincerely, + </p> + <p> + Helen H. Gardener. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0004" id="link2H_4_0004"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + A SPLENDID JUDGE OF A WOMAN. + </h2> + <p> + <i>"We look at the one little woman's face we lovey as we look at the face + of our mother earth, and see all sorts of answers to our own yearnings."</i>—George + Eliot. + </p> +<div style="height: 1em;"> + <br /> + </div> + <p> + "But after all it is not fair to blame her as you do, Cuthbert. She is + what she must be. It is not at all strange. Midge—" + </p> + <p> + "I am quite out of patience with you, Nora;" exclaimed Cuthbert Wagner, + vehemently. "How can you excuse her? Midge, as you call her, has been no + friend to you. She was deceitful and designing all along. She even tried + in every way she could think of to undermine you in <i>my</i> affections!" + He tossed his head contemptuously and strode to the window where he stood + glaring out into the moonlight in fierce and indignant protest. His wife + had so often spoken well of Margaret Mintem. She did not appear to hold + the least resentment toward the school-friend of her past years, while + Cuthbert could see nothing whatever that was good or deserving of praise + in the character of the young lady in question. He was bitterly resentful + because Margaret Mintem had spoken ill of his wife while she was only his + betrothed, and Cuthbert Wagner did not forgive easily. + </p> + <p> + Nora crossed the room with her swift, graceful tread, and the sweep of her + lace gown over the thick rug had not reached her husband's ear as he stood + thumping on the window pane. He started a little, therefore, when a soft + hand was laid upon his arm and a softer face pressed itself close to his + shoulder. + </p> + <p> + "It is very sweet of you, dear," she said in her low, gentle voice, "It is + very sweet of you to feel so keenly any thrust made at me; but darling, + you are unfair to Midge, poor girl! My heart used often to bleed for her. + It must be terribly hard for her to fight her own nature, as she does,—as + she <i>must</i>,—and lose the battle so often after all." + </p> + <p> + "Fight fiddle-sticks!" said Cuthbert, and then went on grumbling in + inarticulate sounds, at which his wife laughed out merrily. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, boo, boo, boo," she said, pretending to imitate his unuttered words. + </p> + <p> + "I don't believe a word of it. <i>I know Margaret Mintern</i>. Did I not + room with her for three long years? And do I not know that she is a good + girl, and a very noble one, too, in spite of her little weakness of envy + or jealousy? + </p> + <p> + "She can't help that. I am sure she must be terribly humiliated by it. + Indeed, indeed, dear, I know that she is; but she cannot master it. It is + a part of her. I do not know whether she was bom with it or not; but I do + know that all of her life since she was a very little girl she has been so + situated that just that particular defect in her character is the + inevitable result. Don't you believe, Cuthbert, that all such things are + natural productions? Why, dearie, it seems to me that you might as + reasonably feel angry with me because my hair is brown as toward Midge + because her envy sometimes overbears her better qualities. The real fault + lies—" + </p> + <p> + "O Nora, suppose you take the stump! Lecture on 'Whatever is is right,' + and have done with it." + </p> + <p> + "Aha, my dear," laughed his wife, "I have caught you napping again. I do + not say that it is right; but I do say that it is natural for Margaret to + be just what she is. That is just the point people always overlook, it + seems to me. Nature is wrong about half of the time—even inanimate + nature. Just look over there! See those splendid mountains and the lovely + little valley all touched with moonlight; but, oh, how the eye longs for + water! A lake, a splendid river, the ocean in the distance—something + that is water—<i>anything</i> that is water! But no, it is valley + and mountain and mountain and valley, until the most beautiful spot in the + world, when first you see it, grows hateful and tiresome and lacking in + the most important feature." + </p> + <p> + Cuthbert laughed. "A lake would look well just over there by McGuire's + barn, now, wouldn't it? And, come to think of it, how a few mountains + would improve things over at Newport or Long Beach." He stopped to thump a + bug from his wife's shoulder. + </p> + <p> + "How pretty you look in that black lace, little woman. I don't believe + nature needed any improver once in her life anyhow—when she made + you." + </p> + <p> + Nora smiled. A pleased, gratified little dimple made itself visible at one + corner of her mouth. Her husband stooped over and kissed it lightly, just + as the portiere was drawn aside and a guest announced by James, the + immaculate butler. + </p> + <p> + "We've just been having a quarrel, Bailey," said Mr. Wagner, as he + advanced to greet the visitor, "and now I mean to leave it to you if—" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," drawled Mr. Bailey, "I noticed that as I came in. You were just + punctuating your quarrel as James drew back the portiere. That is the + reason I coughed so violently as I stepped inside. Don't be alarmed about + my health. It isn't consumption. It is only assumption, I do assure you. I + assumed that you assumed that you were alone—that there wasn't an + interested spectator; but, great Scott! Bert, I don't blame you, so don't + apologize;" and with a low bow of admiration to his friend's wife, he + joined in the laugh. + </p> + <p> + "But what was the row? I'm consumed to hear it," he added, as they were + seated. "I should be charmed to umpire the matter—so long as it + ended that way. Now, go on; but I want to give you fair warning, old man, + that I am on Mrs. Wagner's side to start with, so you fire off your + biggest guns and don't attempt to roll any twisted balls." + </p> + <p> + "<i>Curved</i> balls," laughed Nora, "not twisted; and it seems to me you + mixed your games just a wee bit. There isn't any game with guns and balls + both, is there?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, yes, yes indeed," replied Mr. Bailey, promptly. "The old, old game in + which there is brought to bear a battery of eyes." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, don't," said Cuthbert. "I am not equal to it! But after all, I can't + see that you are well out of this, Ned. Where do the balls come in?" + </p> + <p> + "What have you against eyeballs that roll in a fine frenzy when a battery + of handsome eyes is trained upon a bashful fellow like me?" he asked quite + gravely, and then all three laughed and Cuthbert pretended to faint. + </p> + <p> + "I shall really have to protest, myself, if you go any farther, Mr. + Bailey," said Nora. + </p> + <p> + "You are getting into deep water, and if you are to be on my side in the + coming contest, I want you to have a cool head and—" + </p> + <p> + "A clean heart;" put in Cuthbert. + </p> + <p> + "Mrs. Wagner never asks for impossibilities, I am sure," said Mr. Bailey, + dryly. + </p> + <p> + "But she does. That is just it. She wants to make me believe that a girl + who traduced her and acted like a little fiend generally, is an adorable + creature—a natural production which couldn't help itself—had + to behave that way. We—" + </p> + <p> + "I believe I started in by saying that I should be on your side, Mrs. + Wagner," said their guest, assuming a judicial attitude and bracing + himself behind an imaginary pile of accumulated evidence, "but I'm + beginning to wobble already. If Bert makes another home run like that, I + warn you, madam, that while I shall endeavor to be a fair and impartial + judge, I shall decide against you." + </p> + <p> + Nora's eyes had a twinkle in their depths for an instant, but her face had + grown grave. + </p> + <p> + "Wait. Let me tell you." she said. "Even Cuthbert does not know just how + it was—what went to make my old school-friend's character precisely + what it became. It was like this: When she was a very little girl her + father died, and the poor little mother went back home with her four young + children, and her crushed pride, to be an additional burden to the already + overburdened father, who was growing old and who had small children of his + own still to educate and pilot through society. He had lost his hold on + business when he went into the army; and although he came home a general, + quite covered with glory, a large family cannot live on glory, you know, + and fame will not buy party dresses for three daughters and a grandchild." + </p> + <p> + "I've noticed that," remarked Mr. Bailey, dryly. + </p> + <p> + "The added importance of his position and the consequent publicity made + the handsome party gowns all the more necessary, however," said Nora, not + heeding the interruption, "and so the family had to do a great many things + that were not pleasant to make even one end meet, as poor Midge used to + say. The General loved brains and his granddaughter was very bright." + </p> + <p> + Cuthbert gave a low whistle. He would not compromise. If he found one + thing wrong in an acquaintance all things were wrong. It followed, + therefore, in his mind, that since Margaret Min-tern had been guilty of + envy, she was altogether unlikely to possess fine mental capabilities. He + would not even allow that she was stylish and sang well. + </p> + <p> + His wife took no notice of his outburst, but her color deepened a little + as she went on. + </p> + <p> + "She was the most clever girl mentally that I have ever known and she was + a vast deal of service to me in the years we were together. She sharpened + my wits and stimulated my thoughts in a thousand ways, for which I am her + debtor still. But I am getting ahead of my story. As I say, the old + General worshipped brains, but he also adored beauty; and, alas, his + granddaughter was quite plain—" + </p> + <p> + "Ugly as a hedge-fence, and I never could see that she was so superhumanly + brilliant or stylish, as you claim, either," put in Cuthbert Wagner, as he + leaned back in his deep chair with his eyes drawn to a narrow line. + </p> + <p> + "She was almost exactly the same age of her Aunt Julia, the General's + youngest daughter; but Julia was a dream of beauty and of stupidity." + </p> + <p> + "Situation is now quite plain," said Mr. Bailey. "The lovely Julie got + there. She always does, and—" + </p> + <p> + "Ah, but you must remember that in this case 'there' was the heart of the + father of one and the grandfather of the other," said Nora, smiling. + </p> + <p> + Her husband laughed outright and faced Mr. Bailey. + </p> + <p> + "I rather think she has got you now, old man. In a case like that I'm + hanged if I know how it would turn out—who would get there. The + elements won't mix. It is not the usual thing. + </p> + <p> + "The beautiful stupid and the brilliant but plain are all right,—regular + stage properties, so to speak,—but the grandfather! I'll wager if we + tossed up for it, and you got heads and I got tails we'd both be wrong. + </p> + <p> + "There is something actually uncanny in the aged grandparent ingredient in + a conundrum like that. Now if it were a young fellow,—only the + average donkey,—why of course the lovely Julia would bear off the + palm and leave Midge, as Nora calls her, to pine away. But if it were a + level-headed, middle-aged chap like me, brains would take precedence." He + waved his hand lightly toward his wife, who parted her lips over a set of + little white teeth and a radiant smile burst forth. + </p> + <p> + "You are a bold hypocrite, Bert," said Mr. Bailey. "You did not have to + make any such choice, and you are not entitled to the least credit in the + premises. You got both." + </p> + <p> + "This is really quite overwhelming," laughed Nora; "but—" + </p> + <p> + "Why on earth did you call her attention to it, Ned," exclaimed Mr. + Wagner, with great pretence of annoyance. "She would have swallowed it + whole. I wonder why it is a woman so loves to be told that you married her + for her intellect, when in nine hundred and ninety-nine cases out of eight + hundred and forty you did nothing of the kind, and she knows it perfectly + well. You married her because you loved her, brains or no brains, beauty + or no beauty, and that's an end of it. Isn't that so, Ned?" + </p> + <p> + "Well, I'm not prepared to say, yet. I am umpire. I have not made up my + mind which I shall marry—the lovely Julia, or the brilliant niece; + but I think I shall in the long run." + </p> + <p> + "God help you if you do!" said Cuthbert, dramatically. "I don't know + Julia, the beautiful; but I'd hate to see you married to a cat with uncut + claws, Ned, much as I think you need dressing down from time to time." + </p> + <p> + "Mrs. Wagner," said Mr. Bailey, turning to her, gravely, "I'm not paying + the least attention to him, and I am eager to hear how the grandfather got + out of it." + </p> + <p> + "The <i>grandfather!</i>" exclaimed Nora, "why I had no idea of telling + his story. It was the two girls I was interested in—or at least, in + one of them; but that is just like a man. He—" + </p> + <p> + She allowed her feather fan to fall in her lap and looked up helplessly. + "But come to think of the other side, his story <i>would</i> be worth + telling, wouldn't it? It must have been a rather trying situation for him, + too." + </p> + <p> + She took the fan up again, and waved it before her, thoughtfully. "I + wonder why I never thought of that before. I have always rather blamed him + for developing his granddaughter's one sad defect. I thought he should + have guarded her against it. And—I do wonder if it is because I am a + woman that I never before thought how very difficult it must have been for + him?" + </p> + <p> + "No doubt, no doubt," said her husband, dryly. "But now that we have shed + a few tears over our mental shortcomings and lack of breadth of sympathy + in overlooking the sad predicament of the doughty General, proceed. The + umpire sleepeth apace, and I've got to have my shy at the charming Midge + before we've done with her," and he shut his paper-knife with a wicked + little click. + </p> + <p> + "You can see how it would be," Nora began again, quite gravely, and the + gentlemen both smiled. "You can see how it would be. The granddaughter was + made to feel that she was in the way—was a burden. Her mother would + urge her to become indispensable to the old General. To read to him, talk + brightly to him, sing and play for him, watch his moods and meet them + cleverly. It was all done as a race for his affections. Julia raced with + her, setting her beauty and the other great fact that she was the child of + his old age over against the entertaining qualities of her rival." + </p> + <p> + Mr. Bailey drew his handkerchief across his brow and looked helplessly + perplexed, while Cuthbert responded with a dreary shake of the head. + </p> + <p> + "It is a clear case of 'The Lady or the Tiger,' yet, so far as I can see," + said he. "Who got there, Bailey?" + </p> + <p> + Mr. Bailey smiled despairingly, and shook his head, but said nothing. + </p> + <p> + "It went on like that day after day, week after week, month after month, + year after year," continued Nora, looking steadily in front of her and + shivering a little, "until they were both young ladies. The General gave a + party to present them both to society at the same time. His granddaughter + tried to make him feel that he was repaid for the expense and trouble by + the display of her exceptional powers as a conversationalist—Julia, + by the display of her neck and shoulders, her exquisite rose-leaf face, + and her childishly pretty manners. This sort of rivalry would have been + well enough, no doubt, if it had not been for the fact that from childhood + up to this culmination there had been a dash of bitterness in it, an + un-der-current of antagonism; and poor Midge had always been the main + sufferer, because she was very sensitive and she was made to feel that all + she received was taken from her aunt Julia. To stand first with her + father, Julia would do almost anything; and the ingenuity with which she + devised cruel little stabs at Midge was simply phenomenal. To be + absolutely necessary to him became almost a mania with his granddaughter." + </p> + <p> + "If this thing goes on much longer, I am going to have a fit," Cuthbert + announced, placidly. + </p> + <p> + "The girl you judge so harshly, poor child, had a great many of them," + said Nora, with an inflection in her voice that checked a laugh on Mr. + Bailey's lips. "Fits of depression, fits of anger, fits of sorrow, fits of + shame and of indignation with herself and with others. For there were + times when she stooped to little meannesses which her sensitive soul + abhorred. If intense effort resulted, after all, in failure, envy of her + successful rival grew up in her heart; and, sometimes, if it were + carefully cultivated by the pruning hook of sarcasm or an unkind look of + triumph, she would say or do a mean or underhand thing, and then regret it + passionately when it was too late." + </p> + <p> + Cuthbert gave a grunt of utter incredulity. + </p> + <p> + "Regretted it so little she'd do it again next day," he grumbled. Nora + went steadily on. + </p> + <p> + "It grew to be the one spring and impulse of her whole nature—the + necessity of her existence—to stand <i>first</i> with the ruling + spirit wherever she was, whoever it might be. At school I have known her + to sit up all night to make sure that she would be letter-perfect in her + lessons the following morning. Not because she cared for her studies so + much as because she <i>must</i> feel that she stood first in the + estimation of her teachers. And then, too, her grandfather would know and + be proud of her. It got to be nature with her (I do not know how much of + the tendency may have been born in her) to need to stand on the top + wherever she was. (It has always seemed to me that the conditions + surrounding her were quite enough to explain this characteristic without + an appeal to a possible heredity of which I can know nothing.) Even where + we boarded, although she disliked the women and looked down upon the young + men, she made them all like her, and even went the length of allowing one + young fellow to ask her to marry him simply because she saw that he was + interested in me." + </p> + <p> + "Humph! She—" began Cuthbert, but his wife held up her hand to check + him, and did not pause in her story. + </p> + <p> + "Up to that time she had not given him a thought, and she was very angry + when he finally asked the great question. She thought that he should have + known that such a girl as she was could not be for a man of his + limitations. She felt insulted. She flew up stairs and cried with + indignation. 'The mere idea!' she said to me. 'How dared he! The common + little biped!' I told her that she had encouraged him, and had brought + unnecessary pain upon him as well as regret upon herself. Then she was + angry with me. By and by she put her hand out in the darkness and took + mine and pressed it. Then she said, 'Nora, it <i>was</i> my fault; but—but—' + and then she began to sob again. 'But, Nora, I don't—know—why—I—did—it—and,' + there was a long pause. 'And, beside, I <i>thought</i> he was in love with + you,'" she sobbed out. + </p> + <p> + "That was the whole story," said Cuthbert, resentfully. "She simply wanted + to supplant you and—" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, that <i>was</i> the whole story, as you say, dear," said his wife, + gently; "but the poor girl could not help it. And—and she did not + understand it herself at all." + </p> + <p> + "You make me provoked, Nora," said Cuthbert, almost sharply. "She wasn't a + fool. She tried the same game on me a year or two later; but that time it + didn't work. She even went the length of talking ill of you to me—saying + little cutting things—when she found I had utterly succumbed to your + attractions. I have to laugh yet when I think of it,—that is, when + it don't make me too angry to laugh,—how I gave her a good round + talking to." He laughed now at the recollection. + </p> + <p> + "She must have taken me for her delightful old grandparent the way I + lectured her. But when I remembered how loyal you were to her, it just + made my blood boil and I told her so." + </p> + <p> + Mr. Bailey shifted his position and began to contemplate giving a verdict + emphatically against the absent lady, when Nora checked him by a wave of + her fan. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I know she did, Cuthbert, and I know everything you said to her. You + were very cruel—if you had understood, as you did not and do not + yet. She came and told me all about it." Cuthbert Wagner gave a low, + incredulous whistle, and even Mr. Bailey looked sceptical. + </p> + <p> + "She came back from that drive with you the most wretched girl you ever + saw. Her humiliation was pitiful to see. Her self-reproach was touching + and real. I believe she would have killed herself if I had seemed to blame + her." + </p> + <p> + Cuthbert snapped out: + </p> + <p> + "Humph! Very likely; and gone and done the same thing again the next day." + </p> + <p> + "Possibly that is true—if there had been a next day with a new + temptation that was too strong for her on the shore where she landed after + death If—" + </p> + <p> + "If the Almighty had shown a preference for some one else, hey?" asked Mr. + Bailey, flippantly. + </p> + <p> + "No doubt, no doubt," acquiesced Nora. "But suppose you had a weak leg and + it gave way at a critical moment—say just when you were entering an + opera box to greet a lady. Suppose it dropped you in a ridiculous or + humiliating manner. You would rage and be distressed, and make up your + mind not to let it occur again, except in the seclusion of your own + apartments; but—well, it would be quite as likely to serve you the + same trick the following week, in church." + </p> + <p> + "The illustration does not strike me as quite fair," said Mr. Bailey, + judicially. + </p> + <p> + "Good, Ned! Don't let her argue you into an interest in that little cat. + She was simply a malicious little—" + </p> + <p> + "Wait, then," said Nora, ignoring her husband's outburst and looking + steadily at Margaret Mintem's new judge, who was showing signs of passing + a sentence no less severe than if it were delivered by Cuthbert Wagner + himself. + </p> + <p> + "Suppose we take your memory. Are there not some names or dates that <i>will</i> + drop out at times and leave you awkwardly in the lurch?" + </p> + <p> + "Well, rather," said Mr. Bailey, disgustedly. This was his weak spot. + </p> + <p> + "Now, don't you see that a person who has a perfect memory might be as + unfair to you as you are to my old school friend in her little moral + weakness—if we may call it by so harsh a term as that? That was her + one vulnerable spot. It may have been born in her. That I do not know; but + I insist that it <i>was</i> trained and drilled into her as much as her + arithmetic or her catechism were, and with a result as inevitable. She + loathed her fault, but it was too strong for her. Her resolution to + conquer it dropped just short of success very often, indeed; and oh! how + it did hurt her when she realized it and thought it all over, for her + motives were unusually pure, and her moral sense was really very high + indeed." + </p> + <p> + "Moral sense was a little frayed at the edges, I think." + </p> + <p> + "Don't, Cuthbert. You are such a cruelly severe judge. I know Mr. Bailey + is on my side, now, and will think you very unfair. He does not mean to + be, I assure you, Mr. Bailey, and if she had not spoken ill of me he would + see the case fairly. But what <i>are</i> you thinking?" + </p> + <p> + "That it is a rather big question. That I—that I have overstayed my + time. I just came over to ask you to dine with us next Thursday. My mother + has some friends and wants you to meet them. May I leave my judicial + decision open until then?" + </p> + <p> + "Certainly. Pray over it," said Cuthbert, rising; "and if you don't come + out on my side, openly,—as I know you are in your mind,—buy a + wire mask. I won't have any dodging." + </p> + <p> + "Come early. There is a secret to tell," laughed Mr. Bailey as he + withdrew, and then he blushed furiously. "Mother's secret," he added, as + he closed the door behind him. + </p> + <p> + The evening of the dinner the Wagners were later than they had intended to + be, and Mrs. Bailey took Nora aside and said quite abruptly: + </p> + <p> + "I've got to pop it at you rather suddenly. Why didn't you come earlier? + The lady whom Ned is to marry is here, and it is for her I have given the + dinner. Ned went to your house to tell you last week, but his heart failed + him. He said you were all in such a gale of nonsense that he concluded to + wait. It is a very tender subject with him, I assure you. His case is + quite hopeless. He is madly in love, and I am very much pleased with his + choice. She seems as nearly perfect as they ever are, and she is unusually + talented. But here is Ned now. I have told her all about it, my son, come + and be congratulated." + </p> + <p> + He came forward shyly enough for a man of his years and experience, and + took Nora's hand in a helpless way. But Cuthbert relieved matters at once + by a hearty "Well, it is splendid, old fellow. I'm delighted. I—" + </p> + <p> + "But before the others come down," broke in Mr. Bailey, as if to get away + from the subject, "I want to get my discharge papers in that case you + plead before me last week. It lies heavy on my soul, for I am very sorry + to say, Mrs. Wagner, that I am compelled to give judgment against you and + your client. I think she was—I'm with Cuthbert this time. She + impresses me as almost without redeeming qualities. I do not wish to make + her acquaintance. I am sure that I could never force myself to take even a + passing interest in that sort of a moral acrobat. Really, the lovely but + selfish Julia would be my choice in a team of vicious little pacers like + that. I'm sure I should detect your friend's fatal weakness in her every + action. I should be unable to see anything but the hideous green-eyed + monster even in the folds of her lace gowns or the coils of her shining + hair. He would appear to me, ghost-like, peering over her shoulder in the + midst of her most fascinating conversation. I should feel his fangs and + see the glitter of his wicked eyes while I tried to say small nothings to + her, and—" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, not at all," protested Nora. "You would never detect it at all unless + she happened to be fighting for your esteem or admiration where she felt + that odds were against her. She—" + </p> + <p> + "I beg your pardon, Mrs. Wagner, but I am quite sure that I should. Envy + is to me the very worst trait in the human character. I could more easily + excuse or be blinded to anything else. I <i>know</i> that I should detect + it at once. I always do—especially in a woman." + </p> + <p> + "Certainly. Anybody could. You know very well, Nora, that I saw—" + began Cuthbert quite gleefully; but as a salve to her wounded feelings Mr. + Bailey added in a tone of conciliation to Nora: + </p> + <p> + "However, I shall agree to let you test me some day. Present your friend + to me, <i>incog.</i>, and I'll wager—oh, <i>anything</i> that I + shall read her like a book on sight. I'm a splendid judge of a woman. + Always was from childhood. I'm sure that I should feel creepy the moment I + saw the brilliant but envious granddaughter of the unfortunate old + warrior. And by the way, <i>he</i> continues to be the one for whom you + have enlisted my sympathy. I wonder that he was able to live two weeks in + the same house with such a—" + </p> + <p> + "Cat," said Cuthbert, with a vicious jab at a paper-weight which + represented a solemn-looking Chinese god in brocade trousers. He was just + turning to enter into a cheerful and elaborate statement of his side of + the controversy, as Mrs. Bailey swept down the room with her son's + betrothed upon her arm, smiling and happy. + </p> + <p> + "Margaret Mintern!" exclaimed Nora, in dismay, and then— + </p> + <p> + "I am so glad to see you again, dear, and to be able to congratulate you, + instead of some fair unknown, upon the fact that you are to have so dear a + friend of ours for a husband. We think everything of Mr. Bailey. He is + Bert's best friend and—" + </p> + <p> + Cuthbert had turned half away in utter confusion when he saw the ladies + coming down the room, and feigned an absorption in the rotund Chinese + deity which he had never displayed for the one of his own nation. But he + bowed now, and mumbled some inarticulate sounds as he looked, not at the + future Mrs. Bailey, but at the ridiculously happy face of her lover, whose + usually ready tongue was silent as he hung upon the lightest tone of the + brilliant woman beside him. As they passed into the dining-room, Nora + managed to say to her husband: + </p> + <p> + "Thank heaven we did not mention her name to him, and he evidently does + not suspect. Pull yourself together and stumble through your part the best + you can, dear, without attracting his attention. And then you know that he + and you agree perfectly about the—cat," she added wickedly, and then + she smiled quietly as she took her seat next to the blissful lover and the + relentless judge of the school friend of her youth. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0005" id="link2H_4_0005"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + THE LADY OF THE CLUB. + </h2> +<pre xml:space="preserve"> + "Poor naked wretches, wheresoe'er you are, + That bide the pelting of this pitiless storm, + How shall your houseless heads, and unfed sides, + Your loop'd, and window'd raggedness, defend you + From seasons such as these? O, I have ta'en + Too little care of this! Take physic, pomp; + Expose thyself to feel what wretches feel; + That thou may'st shake the super flux to them, + Show the heavens more just." + + Shakespeare. +</pre> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0006" id="link2H_4_0006"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + I. + </h2> + <p> + The old and somewhat cynical saying, that philosophers and reformers can + bear the griefs and woes of other people with a heroism and resignation + worthy of their creeds, would have fitted the case of Roland Barker only + when shorn of the intentional sting of sarcasm. It is, nevertheless, true + that even his nobly-gifted nature, his tender heart, and his alert brain + sometimes failed to grasp the very pith and point of his own arguments. + </p> + <p> + He was a wealthy man whose sympathies were earnestly with the poor and + unfortunate. He believed that he understood their sufferings, their + ambitions, and their needs; and his voice and pen were no more truly on + the side of charity and brotherly kindness than was his purse. + </p> + <p> + It was no unusual thing for him to attend a meeting, address a club, or + take part in a memorial service, where his was the only hand unused to + toil, and where he alone bore all expense, and then—after dressing + himself in the most approved and faultless manner—become the guest + of honor at some fashionable entertainment. Indeed, he was a leader in + fashion as well as in philosophy, and at once a hero in Avenue A and on + Murray Hill. + </p> + <p> + On the evening of which I am about to tell you he had addressed a club of + workingmen in their little dingy hall, taking as his subject "Realities of + Life." He had sought to show them that poverty and toil are not, after + all, the worst that can befall a man, and that the most acute misery + dwells in palaces and is robed in purple. + </p> + <p> + He spoke with the feeling of one who had himself suffered—as, + indeed, he had—from the unsympathetic associations of an uncongenial + marriage. He portrayed, with deep feeling, the chill atmosphere of a + loveless home, whose wealth and glitter and lustre could never thrill and + enrapture the heart as might the loving hand-clasp in the bare, chill + rooms where sympathy and affection were the companions of poverty. + </p> + <p> + I had admired his enthusiasm as he pictured the joy of sacrifice for the + sake of those we love, and I had been deeply touched by his pathos—a + pathos which I knew, alas, too well, sprang from a hungry heart—whether, + as now, it beat beneath a simple coat of tweed or, as when hours later, it + would still be the prisoner of its mighty longing, though clothed with + elegance and seated at a banquet fit for princes. + </p> + <p> + The last words fell slowly from his lips, and his eyes were dimmed, as + were the eyes of all about me. His voice, so full of feeling, had hardly + ceased to throb when, far back in the little hall, arose a woman, thin and + worn, and plainly clad, but showing traces of a beauty and refinement + which had held their own and fought their way inch by inch in spite of + poverty, anxiety, and tears. The chairman recognized her and asked her to + the platform. + </p> + <p> + "No," she said, in a low, tremulous tone which showed at once her feeling + and her culture—"no, I do not wish to take the platform; but since + you ask for criticism of the kind speech we have just listened to, it has + seemed to me that I might offer one, although I am a stranger to you all." + </p> + <p> + Her voice trembled, and she held firmly to the back of a chair in front of + her. The chairman signified his willingness to extend to her the privilege + of the floor, and there was slight applause. She bowed and began again + slowly: + </p> + <p> + "I sometimes think that it is useless to ever try to make the suffering + rich and the suffering poor understand each other. I do not question that + the gentleman has tasted sorrow. All good men have. I do not question that + his heart is warm and true and honest, and that he truly thinks what he + has said; but"—and here her voice broke a little and her lip + trembled—"but he does not know what real suffering is. He cannot. No + rich man can." There was a movement of impatience in the room, and some + one said, loud enough to be heard, "If she thinks money can bring + happiness she is badly left." + </p> + <p> + There was a slight ripple of laughter at this, and even the serious face + of Roland Barker grew almost merry for a moment. Then the woman went on, + without appearing to have noticed the interruption: + </p> + <p> + "I do not want to seem ungracious, and heaven knows, no one could mean + more kindly what I say; but he has said that money is not needed to make + us happy—only love; and again he quotes that baseless old maxim, + 'The love of money is the root of all evil.'" She paused, then went slowly + on as if feeling her way and fearing to lose her hold upon herself: "I + know it is a sad and cruel world even to the more fortunate, if they have + hearts to feel and brains to think. To the unloving or unloved there must + be little worth; but they at least are spared the agony that sits where + love and poverty have shaken hands with death"—her voice broke, and + there was a painful silence in the room—"where those who love are + wrung and torn by all the thousand fears and apprehensions of ills that + are to come to wife and child and friend. The day has passed when all this + talk of poverty and love—that love makes want an easy thing to bear—the + day has passed, I say, when sane men ought to think, or wise men speak, + such cruel, false, and harmful words. He truly says that money without + love cannot bring happiness; but that is only half the truth, for love + with poverty can bring, does bring, the keenest agony that mortals ever + bore." + </p> + <p> + There was a movement of dissent in the hall. She lifted her face a moment, + contracted her lips, drew a long breath, and said: + </p> + <p> + "I will explain. Without the love, poverty were light enough to bear. What + does it matter for one's self? It is the love that gives the awful sting + to want, and makes its cruel fingers grip the throat as never vise or + grappling-hook took hold, and torture with a keener zest than fiends their + victims! Love and Poverty! <i>It is the combination that devils invented + to make a hell on earth.</i>" + </p> + <p> + All eyes were fastened on her white face now, and she was rushing on, her + words, hot and impassioned, striking firm on every point she made. + </p> + <p> + "Let me give you a case. In a home where comfort is—or wealth—a + mother sits, watching by night and day the awful hand of Death reach + nearer, closer to her precious babe, and nothing that skill or science can + suggest will stay the hand or heal the aching heart; and yet there is + comfort in the thought that all was done that love and wealth and skill + could do, and that it was Nature's way. But take from her the comfort of + that thought. She watches with the same poor, breaking heart, but with the + knowledge, now, to keep her company, that science might, ah! <i>could</i>, + push back the end, could even cure her babe if but the means to pay for + skill and change and wholesome food and air were hers. Is that no added + pang? Is poverty no curse to her?—a curse the deeper for her depth + of love? The rich know naught of this. It gives to life its wildest agony, + to love its deepest hurt." + </p> + <p> + She paused. There was a slight stir as if some one had thought to offer + applause, and then the silence fell again, and she began anew, with + shining eyes and cheeks aflame. She swayed a little as she spoke and + clutched the chair as for support. Her voice grew hoarse, and trembled, + and she fixed her gaze upon a vacant chair: + </p> + <p> + "But let me tell you of another case. A stone's throw from this hall, + where pretty things are said week after week—and kindly meant, I + know—of poverty and love—of the blessedness of these—there + is a living illustration, worth more than all the theories ever spun, to + tell you what 'realities of life' must be where love is great and poverty + holds sway. Picture, with me, the torture and despair of a refined and + cultured woman who watches hour by hour the long months through, and sees + the creeping feet of mental wreck, and physical decay, and knows the + mortal need of care and calm for him who is the whole of life to her, and + for the want of that which others waste and hold as dross he must work on + and on, hastening each day the end <i>he</i> does not see, which shall + deprive him of all of life except the power for ill.... She will be worse + than widowed and alone, for ever by her side sits Want, for him, tearing + at every chord of heart and soul—not for herself—but for that + dearer one, wrecked in the prime of life and left a clod endowed only with + strength for cruel wrong, whose hand would sheath a knife in her dear + heart and laugh with maniac glee at his mad deeds. She saw the end. She + knew long months ago what was to be, if he must toil and strain his nerve + and brain for need of that which goes from knave to knave, and hoards + itself within cathedral walls, where wise men meet to teach the poor + contentment with their lot! She knew <i>he</i> must not know; the + knowledge of the shadow must be kept from <i>his</i> dear brain until the + very end, by smiles, and cheer, and merry jest from her. Who dare tell <i>her</i> + that riches are a curse? and prate of 'dross' and call on heaven to + witness that its loss is only gain of joy and harbinger of higher, holier + things? Who dare call <i>her</i> as witness for the bliss of poverty with + love?" + </p> + <p> + She slowly raised her hand and, with a quick-drawn breath, pressed it + against her side, and with her eyes still fastened on the vacant chair, + and tears upon her cheeks, falling unchecked upon her heaving bosom, she + held each listener silent and intent on every word she spoke. The time + allotted anyone was long since overrun; but no one thought of that, and + she went on: + </p> + <p> + "'With love!' Ah, there is where the iron can burn and scar and open every + wound afresh each day, make poverty a curse, a blight, a scourge, a + vulture, iron-beaked, with claws of burning steel, that leave no nerve + untouched, no drop of blood unshed. + </p> + <p> + "'With love!' 'Tis there the hand of Poverty can deal the deadliest blows, + and show, as nowhere else on earth, the value of that slandered, hoarded + thing called wealth." + </p> + <p> + There blazed into her face a fierce, indignant light, her voice swelled + out and struck upon the ear like fire-bells in the dead of night: + </p> + <p> + "'The root of evil!'—'poverty with love!' Hypocrisy, in purple + velvet robed, behind stained glass, with strains of music falling on its + ears, with table spread in banquet-hall below, bethought itself to argue + thus to those itself had robbed; while, thoughtless of its meaning and its + birth, the echo of its lying, treacherous words comes from the pallid lips + of many a wretch whose life has been a failure and an agony because of + that which he himself extols. A lie once born contains a thousand lives, + and holds at bay the struggling, feeble truth, if but that lie be fathered + by a priest and mothered by a throne—<i>as this one was!</i> 'The + root of evil' is the spring of joy. Decry it those who will. And those who + do <i>not</i> love, perchance, may laugh at all its need can mean; but to + the loving, suffering poor bring no more cant, and cease to voice the + hollow words of Ignorance and Hypocrisy. It is too cruel, and its deadly + breath has long enough polluted sympathy and frozen up the springs of + healthy thought, while sheathing venomed fangs in breaking hearts. Recast + your heartless creeds! Your theories for the poor are built on these." + </p> + <p> + She sank back into her chair white and exhausted. + </p> + <p> + There was a wild burst of applause. A part of the audience, with that ear + for sound and that lack of sense to be found in all such gatherings, had + forgotten that it was not listening to a burst of eloquence which had been + duly written out and committed to memory for the occasion. + </p> + <p> + But Roland Barker sprang to his feet, held both his hands up, to command + silence, and said, in a scarcely audible voice, as he trembled from head + to foot: "Hush, hush! She has told the truth! She has told the awful + truth! I never saw it all before. Heaven help you to bear it. It seems to + me I cannot!" + </p> + <p> + Several were pale and weeping. I turned to speak to the woman who had + changed an evening's entertainment into a tragic scene; but she had + slipped out during the excitement. I took Barker's arm and we walked + towards the Avenue together. Neither of us spoke until we reached Madison + Square. Here the poor fellow sank into a seat and pulled me down beside + him. + </p> + <p> + "Don't talk to me about theories after that," he said. "Great God! I am + more dead than alive. I feel fifty years older than when I went to that + little hall to teach those people how to live by my fine philosophy, and I + truly thought that I had tasted sorrow and found the key to resignation. + Ye gods!" + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps you have," I said. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, yes," he replied, impatiently; "but suppose I had to face life day + by day, hour by hour, as that woman pictured it—and she was a lady + with as keen a sense of pain as I—what do you suppose my philosophy + would do for me then? Do you think I could endure it? And I went there to + teach those people how to suffer and be strong!" + </p> + <p> + "Look here, Barker," I said, "you'd better go home now and go to bed. You + are cold and tired, and this won't help matters any." + </p> + <p> + "What will?" he asked. + </p> + <p> + I made no reply. When we reached his door he asked again: + </p> + <p> + "What will?" + </p> + <p> + I shook my head and left him standing in the brilliant hall of his + beautiful home, dazed and puzzled and alone. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0007" id="link2H_4_0007"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + II. + </h2> + <p> + The next time I met Roland Barker he grasped my hand and said excitedly: + "I have found that woman! What she said is all true. My God! what is to be + done? I feel like a strong man tied hand and foot, while devilish vultures + feed on the flesh of living babes before my eyes!" + </p> + <p> + "Stop, Barker," I said; "stop, and go away for a while, or you will go + mad. What have you been doing? Look at your hands; they tremble like the + hands of a palsied man; and your face; why, Barker, your face is haggard + and set, and your hair is actually turning gray! What in the name of all + that's holy have you been doing?" + </p> + <p> + "Nothing, absolutely nothing!" he exclaimed "That is the trouble! What <i>can</i> + I do? I tell you something is wrong, Gordon, something is desperately + wrong in this world. Look at that pile of stone over there: millions of + dollars are built into that. It is opened once each week, aired, cleaned, + and put in order for a fashionable audience dressed in silk and + broadcloth. They call it a church, but it is simply a popular club house, + which, unlike other club houses, hasn't the grace to pay its own taxes. + They use that club house, let us say, three hours in all, each week, for + what? To listen to elaborate music and fine-spun theories about another + world. They are asked to, and they give money to send these same theories + to nations far away, who—to put it mildly—are quite as well + off without them. Then that house is closed for a week, and those who sat + there really believe that they have done what is right by their + fellow-men! Their natural consciences, their sense of right and justice, + have been given an anaesthetic. 'The poor ye have with you always,' they + are taught to believe, is not only true, but <i>right</i>. I tell you, + Gordon, it is all perfectly damnable, and it seems to me that I cannot + bear it when I remember that woman." + </p> + <p> + "She is only one of a great many," I suggested. + </p> + <p> + Roland Barker groaned: "My God! that is the trouble—so many that the + thing seems hopeless. And to think that on every one of even these poor + souls is laid another burden that that stone spire may go untaxed!" + </p> + <p> + "Barker," I said, laying my hand on his arm, "tell me what has forced all + this upon you with such a terrible weight just now." + </p> + <p> + "Not here, not now," he said. "I have written it down just as she told it + to me—you know I learned stenography when I began taking an interest + in public meetings. Well, I've just been copying those notes out. They are + in my pocket," he said, laying his hand on his breast. "They seem to burn + my very soul. I would not dare to trust myself to read them to you here. + Come home with me." + </p> + <p> + When we were seated in his magnificent library, he glanced about him, and + with a wave of his hand said, with infinite satire: "You will notice the + striking appropriateness of the surroundings and the subject." + </p> + <p> + "No doubt," I said. "I have often noticed that before, especially the last + time I heard a sermon preached to three of the Vanderbilts, two Astors, + five other millionaires, and about sixty more consistent Christians, all + of whom were wealthy. The subject was Christ's advice to the rich young + man, 'Sell all thou hast and give to the poor.' But never mind; go on; the + day has passed when deed and creed are supposed to hold the slightest + relation to each other; and what is a $20,000 salary for if not to buy + sufficient ability to explain it all sweetly away and administer, at the + same time, an anæsthetic to the natural consciences of men?" + </p> + <p> + I settled myself in a large Turkish chair on one side of the splendidly + carved table; he stood on the other side sorting a manuscript. Presently + he began reading it. "'When I married Frank Melville he was strong and + grand and brave; a truer man never lived. He had been educated for the + law. His practice was small, but we were able to live very well on what he + made, and the prospect for the future was bright. We loved each other—but, + ah! there are no words to tell that. We worshipped each other as only two + who have been happily mated can ever understand. We lived up to his + salary. Perhaps you will say that that was not wise. We thought it was. A + good appearance, a fairly good appearance at least, was all that we could + make, and to hold his own in his profession, this was necessary. You know + how that is. A shabby-looking man soon loses his hold on paying clients. + Of course he would not dress well and allow me to be ill-clad. He—he + loved me. We were never able to lay by anything; but we were young and + strong and hopeful—and we loved each other.'" Barker's voice + trembled. He looked at me a moment and then said very low: "If you could + have seen her poor, tired, beautiful eyes when she said that." + </p> + <p> + "I can imagine how she looked," I said. "She had a face one remembers." + </p> + <p> + After a little he went on: "We had both been brought up to live well. Our + friends were people of culture, and we—it will sound strange to you + for me to say that our love and devotion were the admiration and talk of + all of them. + </p> + <p> + "'By-and-by I was taken ill. My husband could not bear to think of me as + at home alone, suffering He stayed with me a great deal. I did not know + that he was neglecting his business; I think he did not realize it then; + he thought he could make it all up; he was strong and—he loved me. + At last the doctors told him that I should die if he did not take me away; + I ought to have an ocean voyage. It almost killed him that he could not + give me that. We had not the money. He took me away a little while where I + could breathe the salt air, and the good it did me made his heart only the + sadder when he saw that it was true that all I needed was an ocean voyage. + The climate of his home was slowly killing me. We bore it as long as we + dared, and I got so weak that he almost went mad. Then we moved here, + where my health was good. But it was a terrible task to get business; + there were so many others like him, all fighting, as if for life, for + money enough to live on from day to day. The strain was too much for him, + and just as he began to gain a footing he fell ill, and—and if we + had had money enough for him to take a rest then, and have proper care, + good doctors, and be relieved from immediate anxiety, he would have gotten + well, with my care—I loved him so! But as it was—' Shall I + show you the end?" Barker stopped, he was trembling violently, his eyes + were full of tears. I waited. Presently he said, huskily: "Shall I tell + you, Gordon, what I saw? I have not gotten over it yet. She laid her + finger on her lips and motioned me to follow. The room where we had been + was poor and bare. She took a key from her bosom, opened a door, and went + in. I followed. Sitting in the only comfortable chair—which had been + handsome once—was a magnificent-looking man, so far as mere physical + proportions can make one that. + </p> + <p> + "'Darling,' she said tenderly, as if talking to a little child. 'Darling, + I have brought you a present. Are you glad?' + </p> + <p> + "She handed him a withered rose that I had carelessly dropped as I went + in. + </p> + <p> + "He arose, bowed to me when she presented me, waved me to his chair, took + the flower, looked at her with infinite love, and said: 'To-morrow, little + wife; wait till to-morrow.' + </p> + <p> + "Then he sat down, evidently unconscious of my presence, and gazed + steadily at her for a moment, seeming to forget all else and to struggle + with some thought that constantly eluded him. She patted his hand as if he + were a child, smiling through her heart-break all the while, kissed him, + and motioned me to precede her from the room. + </p> + <p> + "When she came out she locked the door carefully behind her, sank into a + chair, covered her face with her hands, and sobbed as if her heart would + break. After a while she said: 'A little money would have saved, him and + now it is too late, too late. Sometimes he is violent, sometimes like + that. The doctors say the end is not far off, and that any moment he may + kill me, and afterwards awake to know it! It is all the result of poverty + <i>with love!'</i> she said. Then, passionately: 'If I did not love him so + I could bear it, but <i>I cannot, I cannot!</i> And how will <i>he</i> + bear it if he ever harms me—and I not there to help him?'" + </p> + <p> + Barker stepped to the window to hide his emotion. Presently he said, in a + voice that trembled: "If she did not love him so she could let him go to + some—asylum; but she knows the end is sure, and not far off, and + that the gleams of light he has are when he sees her face. She has parted + with everything that made life attractive to keep food and warmth for him. + She is simply existing now from day to day—one constant agony of + soul and sense—waiting for the end. She allowed me to take a doctor + to see him; I would have come for you, but you were out of town. He only + confirmed what others had told her a year ago. He advised her to have him + put in a safe place before he did some violence; but she refused, and made + us promise not to interfere. She said he would be able to harm no one but + her, if he became violent at the last, and she was ready for that. It was + easier far to live that way and wait for that each day than to have him + taken away where he would be unhappy and perhaps ill-treated. He needed + her care and love beside him every hour, and she —she needed + nothing." + </p> + <p> + Here Barker flung himself into a chair and let his head fall on his folded + arms on the table. + </p> + <p> + "That is the way love makes poverty easy to bear," he said, bitterly, + after a time, and his trembling hands clinched tight together. + </p> + <p> + "Did you give her any money?" I asked. + </p> + <p> + He groaned. "Yes, yes, I—that is, I left some on the table under her + sewing. She isn't the kind of woman one can offer charity. She—" + </p> + <p> + "No," I said, "she isn't, and beside, for the pain that tortures her it is + too late now for money to help. Only it may relieve her somewhat to feel + sure that she can get what he needs to eat and wear and to keep him warm + and allow her to be free from the necessity of outside work. I am glad you + left the money. But—but—Barker, do you think she will use it, + coming that way and from a stranger?" + </p> + <p> + He looked up forlornly. "No, I don't," he said; "and yet she may. I will + hope so; but if she does, what then? The terrible question will still + remain just where it was. That is no way to solve it; we can't bail out + the ocean with a thimble. And what an infamous imposition all this talk is + of 'resignation' to such as she; for her terrible calm, as she talked to + me, had no hint of resignation in it. She is simply, calmly, quietly + desperate now—and she is one of many." He groaned aloud. + </p> + <p> + "Will you take me there the next time you go?" I asked. + </p> + <p> + "She said I must not come back; she could not be an object of curiosity—nor + allow him to be. She said that she allowed me to come this time because on + the night we first saw her she had stepped into that little hall to keep + herself from freezing in her thin clothes as she was making her way home, + and she saw that I was earnest in what I said, and she stayed to listen—" + his voice broke again. + </p> + <p> + Just then the drapery was drawn back, and his wife, superbly robed, swept + in, bringing a bevy of girls. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, Mr. Barker," said one, gayly, "you don't know what you missed + to-night by deserting our theatre party; it was all so real—love in + rags, you know, and all that sort of thing; only I really don't like to + see <i>quite</i> so much attention paid to the 'Suffering poor,' with a + big S, and the lower classes generally. I think the stage can do far + better than that, don't you? But it is the new fad, I suppose, and after + all I fancy it doesn't do much harm, only as it makes that sort of people + more insufferably obtrusive about putting their ill-clad, bad-smelling + woes before the rest of us. What a beautiful vase this is, Mrs. Barker! + May I take it to the light?" + </p> + <p> + "Certainly, my dear," laughed Mrs. Barker; "and I agree with you, as + usual. I think it is an exquisite vase—and that the stage is + becoming demoralized. It is pandering to the low taste for representations + of low life. I confess I don't like it. That sort of people do not have + the feelings to be hurt—the fine sensibilities and emotions + attributed to them. Those grow up in refined and delicate surroundings. + That is what I often tell Roland when he insists upon making himself + unhappy over some new 'case' of destitution. I tell him to send them five + dollars by mail and not to worry himself, and I won't allow him to worry + me with his Christie-street emotions." + </p> + <p> + Barker winced, and I excused myself and withdrew, speculating on certain + phases of delicacy of feeling and fine sensibility. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0008" id="link2H_4_0008"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + III. + </h2> + <p> + I did not see Barker again for nearly three weeks, when one night my bell + was rung with unusual violence, and I heard an excited voice in my hall. + "Be quick, John; hurry," it said, "and tell the doctor I must see him at + once. Tell him it is Roland Barker." + </p> + <p> + John had evidently demurred at calling me at so late an hour. + </p> + <p> + "All right, Barker; I'll be down in a moment," I called from above. "No, + come up. You can tell me what is the matter while I dress. Is it for + yourself? There, go in that side room, I can hear you, and I'll be dressed + in a moment." + </p> + <p> + "Hurry, hurry," he said, excitedly, "I'll tell you on the way. I have my + carriage. Don't wait to order yours, only hurry, hurry, hurry." + </p> + <p> + Once in the carriage, I said: "Barker, you are going to use yourself up, + this way. You can't keep this sort of thing up much longer. You'd better + go abroad." + </p> + <p> + "Drive faster," he called, to the man on top. Then to me, "If you are not + the first doctor there? there will be a dreadful scene. They will most + likely arrest her for murder." + </p> + <p> + "Whom?" said I. "You have told me nothing, and how can I prevent that if a + murder has been committed?" + </p> + <p> + "By giving her a regular death certificate," said he, coolly, "saying that + you attended the case, and that it was a natural death. I depend upon you, + Gordon; it would be simply infamous to make her suffer any more. I cannot + help her now, but you can, you <i>must</i>. No one will know the truth but + us, and afterwards we can help her—to forget. She is not an old + woman; there may be something in life for her yet." + </p> + <p> + "Is it the Lady of the Club?" I asked. We had always called her that "What + has she done?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," he said, "it is the 'Lady of the Club.' and she has poisoned her + husband." + </p> + <p> + "Good God!" exclaimed I; "and you want me to give her a regular death + certificate and say I attended the case?" + </p> + <p> + "You must," he said; "it would be infamous not to. She could not bear it + any longer. She found herself breaking down, and she would not leave him + alive without her care and love. He had become almost helpless, except + when short violent spells came on. These left him exhausted. He almost + killed her in the last one. Her terror was that he would do so and then + regain his reason—that he would know it afterwards and perhaps be + dragged through the courts. She had been working in a chemist's office, it + seems, when she was able to do anything. She took some aconitine, and + to-night she put everything in perfect order, gave him the best supper she + could, got him to bed, and then—gave him that. She sent for me and + told me as calmly as—God! it was the calm of absolute desperation. + She sat there when I went in, holding his poor dead hand and kissing it + reverently. She laid it down and told me what I tell you. There was not a + tear, a moan, a sigh. She said: 'Here is the money you left—all + except what I paid for his supper to-night. We had gotten down to that + before I had the chance to steal the poison or the courage to give it to + him. I had not meant to use any of the money; the rest is here. I would + like it used—if you are willing—to bury him decently, not in + the Potter's Field, and I would like—if you will take the trouble—to + have it done absolutely privately. We have borne enough. I cannot bear for + even his ashes to be subjected to any further humiliation.'" + </p> + <p> + Roland Barker paused to command himself. "Of course I promised her," he + went on, after a time. "She does not realize that she may be arrested and + have his poor body desecrated to find the cause of death. That would make + her insane—even if— Drive faster!" he called out again to the + man outside. When we reached the house he said: "Be prepared to see her + perfectly calm. It is frightful to witness, and I tremble for the result + later on." + </p> + <p> + When we knocked on her door there was no response. I pushed it open and + entered first. The room was empty. We went to the inner doer and rapped + gently, then louder. There was no sound. Barker opened the door, and then + stepped quickly back and closed it. "She is kneeling there by his bed," he + said; "write the certificate here and give it to me. Then I will bring an + undertaker and—he and I can attend to everything else. I did want + you to see her. I think you should give her something to make her sleep. + That forced calm will make her lose her mind. She is so shattered you + would not recognize her." + </p> + <p> + "Stay here, Barker," I said; "I want to see her alone for a moment. I will + tell her who I am and that you brought me—if I need to." + </p> + <p> + He eyed me sharply, but I stepped hastily into the inner room. I touched + the shoulder and then the forehead of the kneeling form. It did not move. + "Just as I expected," I muttered, and lifting the lifeless body in my arms + I laid it gently beside her husband. In one hand she held the vial from + which she had taken the last drop of the deadly drug, and clasped in the + other her husband's fingers. She had been dead but a few moments, and both + she and her husband were robed for the grave. + </p> + <p> + When I returned to the outer room I found Barker with a note in his hand, + and a shocked and horrified look on his face. He glanced up at me through + his tears. + </p> + <p> + "We were too late," he said. "She left this note for me. I found it here + on the table. She meant to do it all along, and that is why she was so + calm and had no fears for herself." + </p> + <p> + "I thought so when you told me what she had done," said I. + </p> + <p> + "Did you? I did not for a moment, or I would have stayed and tried to + reason her out of it." + </p> + <p> + "It is best as it is," said I, "and you could not have reasoned her out of + it. It was inevitable—after the rest. Take this certificate too; you + will need both." + </p> + <p> + When all was safely over, as we drove home from the new graves two days + later, Barker said: "Is this the solution?" + </p> + <p> + I did not reply. + </p> + <p> + Presently he said: "To the dead, who cannot suffer, we can be kind and + shield them even from themselves. Is there no way to help the living? A + few hundred dollars, two short years ago, would have saved all this, and + there was no way for her to get it. She knew it <i>all</i> then, and there + was no help!" + </p> + <p> + "Why did she not, in such a case as that, push back her pride and go to + some one? There must be thousands who would have gladly responded to such + a call as that," I argued. + </p> + <p> + He buried his face in his hands for a moment and shuddered. At last he + said: "She did—she went to three good men, men who had known, been + friendly with, admired her and her husband. Two of them are worth their + millions, the other one is rich. She only asked to borrow, and promised to + repay it herself if she had to live and work after he were dead to do it!" + </p> + <p> + He paused. + </p> + <p> + "You do not mean to tell me that they refused—and they old friends + and rich?" I asked, amazed. + </p> + <p> + "I mean to say just this: they one and all made some excuse; they did not + let her have it." + </p> + <p> + "She told them what the doctors said, and of her fears?" + </p> + <p> + "She did," he answered, sadly. + </p> + <p> + "And yet you say they are good men!" I exclaimed, indignantly. + </p> + <p> + "Good, benevolent, charitable, every one of them," he answered. + </p> + <p> + "Were you one of them, Barker?" I asked, after a moment's pause. + </p> + <p> + "Thank God, no!" he replied. "But perhaps in some other case I have done + the same, if I only knew the whole story. Those men do not know this last, + you must remember." + </p> + <p> + "And the worst of it is, we dare not tell them," said I, as we parted. + </p> + <p> + "No, we dare not," he replied, and left me standing with the copy of the + burial certificate in my hand. + </p> + <p> + "Natural causes?" I said to myself, looking at it. "Died of natural causes—the + brutality and selfishness of man—and poverty with love. <i>Natural</i> + causes! Yes." And I closed my office door and turned out the light. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0009" id="link2H_4_0009"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + UNDER PROTEST. + </h2> + <p> + <i>"This is my story, sir; a trifle, indeed, I assure you.</i> + </p> + <p> + <i>"Much more, perchance, might be said; but I hold him, of all men, most + lightly Who swerves from the truth in his tale."</i> + </p> + <p> + Bret Harte. + </p> +<div style="height: 1em;"> + <br /> + </div> + <p> + When the new family moved into, and we were told had bought, the cottage + nearest our own, we were naturally interested in finding out what kind of + people they were, and whether we had gained or lost by the change of + neighbors. + </p> + <p> + In a summer place like this it makes a good deal of difference just what + kind of people live so near to you that when you are sitting on your + veranda and they are swinging in hammocks on theirs, the most of the + conversation is common property, unless you whisper, and one does not want + to spend three or four months of each year mentally and verbally tiptoeing + about one's own premises. Then, on the other hand, there are few less + agreeable situations to be placed in than to be forced to listen to + confidences or quarrels with which you have nothing whatever to do, or + else be deprived of the comforts and pleasures of out-door life, to secure + which you endure so many other annoyances. + </p> + <p> + Our new neighbors were, therefore, as you will admit, of the utmost + interest and importance to us, and I was naturally very much pleased, at + the end of the first week, when I returned one day from a fishing party, + from which my wife's headache had detained her, by the report she gave me + of their attitude toward each other. (From her glowing estimate, I drew + rose-colored pictures of their probable kindliness and generosity toward + others.) Up to this time they had been but seldom outside of their house, + and we had not gathered much information of their doings, except the fact + that a good deal of nice furniture had come, and they appeared to be + greatly taken up in beautifying and arranging their cottage. This much + promised well, so far as it went; but we had not lived to our time of life + not to find out, long ago, that the most exquisitely appointed houses + sometimes lack the one essential feature; that is, ladies and gentlemen to + occupy them. + </p> + <p> + "They are lovely!" said my wife, the moment I entered the door, before I + had been able to deposit my fishing-tackle and ask after her headache. + "They are lovely; at least he is," she amended. "I am sure we shall be + pleased with them; or, at least, with him. A man as careful of, and + attentive to, his wife as he is can't help being an agreeable neighbor." + </p> + <p> + "Good!" said I. "How did you find out? And how is your headache?—Had + a disgusting time fishing. Glad you did not go. Sun was hot; breeze was + hot; boatman's temper was a hundred and twenty in the shade; bait wouldn't + stay on the hooks, and there weren't any fish any way. But how did you say + your head is?" + </p> + <p> + "My head?" said my wife, with that retrospective tone women have, which + seemed to indicate that if she had ever had a head, and if her head had + ever ached, and if headache was a matter of sufficient importance to + remember, in all human probability it had recovered in due time. "My head? + Oh, yes—Oh, it is all right; but you really never did see any one so + tractable as that man. And adaptable! Why, it is a perfect wonder. Of + course I had no business to look or listen; but I did. I just couldn't + help it. The fact is, I thought they were quarrelling at first, and I + almost fainted. I said to myself, 'If they are that kind of people we will + sell out. I will not live under the constant drippings of ill-temper.' + Quarrelling ought to be a penitentiary offence; that is, I mean the + bickerings and naggings most people dignify by that name. I could endure a + good, square, stand-up and knock down quarrel, that had some character to + it; but the eternal differences, often expressed by the tones of voice + only, I can't stand." I smiled an emphatic assent, and my wife went on. + </p> + <p> + "Well, I must confess his tones of voice are, at times, against him; but + I'm not sure that it is not due to the distance. <i>All</i> of his tones + may not carry this far. I'm sure they don't, for when I first heard him, + and made up my mind that it was a horrid, common, plebeian little row, I + went to the west bedroom window—you know it looks directly into + their kitchen—and what do you suppose I saw?" + </p> + <p> + The question was so sudden and wholly unexpected, and my mental apparatus + was so taken up with the story that I found myself with no ideas whatever + on the subject Indeed I do not believe that my wife wanted me to guess + what she saw, half so much as she wanted breath; but I gave the only reply + which the circumstances appeared to admit of, and which, I was pleased to + see, in spite of its seeming inadequacy, was as perfectly satisfactory to + the blessed little woman as if it had been made to order and proven a + perfect fit. + </p> + <p> + "I can't imagine," said I. + </p> + <p> + "Of course you can't," she replied, pushing my crossed legs into position, + and seating herself on my knees. + </p> + <p> + "Of course you can't. A man couldn't. Well, it seems their servant left + last night, and that blessed man was washing the dishes this morning. The + difference of opinion had been over which one of them should do it." + </p> + <p> + "Why, the confounded brute!" said I. "He is a good deal better able to do + it than she is. She looks sick, and so long as he has no business to + attend to down here, he has as much time as she and a good deal more + strength to do that kind of work." + </p> + <p> + "Well, I just knew you'd look at it that way," said my wife, with an + inflection of pride and admiration which indicated that I had made a ten + strike of some kind, of which few men—and not many women—would + be capable. + </p> + <p> + "But that was not it at all," continued she. + </p> + <p> + I began laboriously to readjust my mental moorings to this seemingly + complicated situation, and was on the verge of wondering why my wife was + so pleased with me for simply making a mistake, when she began again, + after giving me a little pat of unqualified satisfaction and sympathy. + </p> + <p> + "They both wanted to do it. She said she wasn't a bit tired and could do + it alone just as well as not, and he'd break the glasses with his funny, + great, big fingers; and he said he'd be careful not to break anything, and + that the dish-water would spoil her hands." + </p> + <p> + "Good," said I, "I shall like the fellow. I———" + </p> + <p> + "Of course you will," my wife broke in, enthusiastically; "but that isn't + all. I went to sleep after that, and later on was awakened by a loud—and + as I thought at the time—a very angry voice. I went to the window + again only to see a laughing scuffle between them over the potato-knife. + She wanted to scrape them and he wanted to scrape them. Of course he got + the knife, and it really did look too comical to see him work with those + little bulbs. He put his whole mind on them, and he didn't catch her + picking over the berries until she was nearly done. Then he scolded again. + He said he did the potatoes to keep her from getting her thumb and + forefinger black, and here she was with her whole hand covered with berry + stain. He seemed really vexed, and I must say his voice doesn't carry this + far as if he was half as nice as he is. I think there ought to be a chair + of voices attached to every school-house—so to speak—and the + result of the training made one of the tests of admission to the colleges + of the country. Don't you?" + </p> + <p> + Again I was wholly unprepared for her sudden question, and was only slowly + clambering around the idea she had suggested, so I said—somewhat + irrelevantly, no doubt—"It may be." + </p> + <p> + She looked at me for a moment without speaking, and then said, as she got + up and crossed the room: "You didn't hear a word I said, and you don't + begin to appreciate that man anyway." + </p> + <p> + "I did hear you, dear," I protested; "I was listening as hard as I could—and + awfully interested—but a fellow can't skip along at that rate and + have well-matured views on tap without a moment's warning. You've got to + be like the noble ladies in the 'Lay of the Last Minstrel,' 'and give me + heart and give me time.' Now <i>they</i> understood men. We're slow." + </p> + <p> + She laughed and tied the last pink bow in the lace of a coquettish little + white gown and dragged me out on the veranda. + </p> + <p> + Our new neighbors were out ahead of us. + </p> + <p> + "I don't think so at all, Margaret," we heard him say, as we took our + chairs near the edge of the porch to catch any stray breeze that might be + wandering our way. + </p> + <p> + "Sh—," we heard her say; "don't talk so loud. They will think you + are going to scalp me." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, don't bother about the neighbors; let 'em hear," said he, "let 'em + think. Who cares? If they haven't got anything better to do than sit + around and think, they'd better move away from our neighborhood." + </p> + <p> + "Sh—said she again, looking at him with a good deal of emphasis in + her eyes. + </p> + <p> + "Well, it is too bad, isn't it?" acquiesced he, in a much lower voice, and + one from which every vestige of the tone of protest had vanished. + </p> + <p> + "It <i>is</i> too bad that these summer cottages are built so close + together that you can't tie your shoes without being overheard by the + folks next door? It makes me nervous. I feel as if I had to sit up + straight all the time and smile like a crocodile, or else run the risk of + being misunderstood." + </p> + <p> + "It <i>is</i> trying, dear," she said, "and destroys a good deal of the + comfort and ease of one's outing." + </p> + <p> + "Nothing of the kind," began he, so explosively as to make my wife jump. + </p> + <p> + "Sh—," whispered the lady next door, but he went on. + </p> + <p> + "Nothing of the kind. I don't let it bother me in the least. They can + attend to their own affairs, and I——" + </p> + <p> + "Sh—," said his wife; "suppose we walk down to the beach." She began + to adjust her wrap. + </p> + <p> + "It is a good deal more comfortable here," he protested, "and besides I'm + tired." + </p> + <p> + "So you are, of course," she said, regretfully. "I forgot. Such unusual + work for a man would tire him;" and she loosened the lace veil she had + drawn over her head and reseated herself. + </p> + <p> + "Well, are you ready?" questioned he, clapping on his hat and suddenly + starting down the steps. + </p> + <p> + "Ready for what?" asked she, in surprise. + </p> + <p> + "The deuce, Margaret. I thought you said that you were going to the + beach!" + </p> + <p> + She got up, readjusted her veil, took her wrap on her arm, and ran lightly + after him. + </p> + <p> + "I wonder if I shall need this wrap?" she said as she passed our gate. + </p> + <p> + "Heavens! no," he replied, "and it will heat you all up to carry it. Here, + give it to me. I don't see what on earth you brought it for. I'm certainly + hot enough without loading me up with this." + </p> + <p> + "I will carry it," she said, cheerfully; "I don't feel the heat on my arm + as you do—or I'll run back and leave it on the porch. You walk + slowly. I can easily catch up." + </p> + <p> + She started; but he took the shawl from her, threw it lightly over his + shoulder, and, pulling her hand through his arm, said gayly, and in the + most compliant tone: "It isn't very warm. I won't notice this little thing + and, besides, you'll need it down there, as like as not." + </p> + <p> + When they were out of hearing my wife drew a long breath and said: "I + wonder if we ever sound like that to other people?—and yet, they + seem to be devoted to each other," she added hastily. + </p> + <p> + "They are, no doubt," said I, "only he appears to be a chronic kicker." + </p> + <p> + "A comic what?" said my wife, in so loud a tone that I involuntarily + exclaimed "Sh—!" + </p> + <p> + We both laughed. Then she said: "But really, dear, I didn't understand + what you said he was. There doesn't seem to me to be anything comic about + him, though. And——" + </p> + <p> + "Comic! Well, I should think not," said I. "I should think it would be + anything but comic to that little woman to go through that sort of thing + every time she opened her mouth. What I said was that he seems to be a + chronic kicker, and I might add—with some show of fairness—that + he impresses me as the champion of Kicktown at that." + </p> + <p> + "Sh—," laughed my wife, "they're coming back." + </p> + <p> + "I don't agree with you at all. There is no need to do anything of the + kind," were the first words we heard from a somewhat distant couple, and + my wife concluded that our new neighbors were not very far off. "It would + be no end of trouble for you. You'd get all tired out; and besides, what + do we owe to the Joneses that makes it necessary for you to disturb all + our little comforts to ask them down here?" he continued. We could not + hear her reply; but his protest and evident deep dissatisfaction with the + whole scheme went bravely on. + </p> + <p> + She passed into the house and left him on the steps. When she came out a + few moments later he said, sweetly: "As I was just saying, it will be + quite a diversion for you to see the girls, and I'd enjoy the old man + hugely. He's a jolly old coon; and then we owe it to them after all they + did for you." + </p> + <p> + "What girls? What old man is a jolly coon?" asked she, in an utterly + bewildered tone. + </p> + <p> + "Margaret! The Joneses, of course. Whom have we been talking about for the + last half-hour?" exploded he. + </p> + <p> + "Oh," said she, having evidently quite given over asking the Joneses, and + become occupied with other thoughts, "I thought the idea did not please + you. But I'm so glad. It will do you good to have him here, and I shall be + delighted." + </p> + <p> + "Do me good!" exploded he. "Do me good! Tiresome old bore, if there ever + was one. Women are queer fish to deal with, but I'm sure I don't care whom + you invite here." + </p> + <p> + Our neighbors withdrew for the night and we sighed with relief. About two + o'clock my wife touched me to find if I was asleep. The movement was so + stealthy that I inferred at once that there were burglars in the house. I + was wide awake in an instant. + </p> + <p> + "What is it?" I whispered. + </p> + <p> + "Well, I'm glad you're awake. I want to know what that was you called the + man next door. I forgot what it was, and I couldn't sleep for trying to + remember." + </p> + <p> + I laughed. "I believe I said that he impressed me as one so addicted to + the reprehensible habit of protest—on general principles, as it were—that + it had now become the normal condition of his mental constitution." + </p> + <p> + "You didn't say any such thing," said she. "You—" + </p> + <p> + "I believe that at the time of which you speak I allowed myself to be + guilty of a habit you do not wholly admire; but I really had no idea it + would keep you awake. I used slang. I said that he was a chronic kicker, + and—" + </p> + <p> + "That's it! That's it!" exclaimed she, with deep satisfaction. "He's a + 'chronic kicker.' Well, if you'll believe me, he hasn't stopped kicking + long enough to say his prayers decently since we went to bed. First about + what time it was; then about which room they'd sleep in; then there was + too much cover; then the windows were wrong; then—oh, heavens!—I + wonder if he kicks in his sleep? He always comes around to reason in time; + but if there was ever anything more maddening to meet than that constant + wall of protest—for the sake of protest—I don't know what it + could be." + </p> + <p> + "Nor—I," said I, half asleep. + </p> + <p> + Presently her hand grasped mine vigorously, and I sprang up startled, for + I had been sound asleep again. "What's the matter?" I said, in a loud + tone. + </p> + <p> + "Sh—," whispered my wife. "Don't speak in that tone. I'd rather + people would think you stayed out nights, than to suppose you stayed at + home and nagged me. He's at it again. I'd most gone to sleep and his voice + nearly scared the life out of me. She wanted to close the window. He + objected, of course; said he'd smother—sh—" + </p> + <p> + Just then we heard our neighbor's wife ask sleepily: "What are you doing, + dear?" + </p> + <p> + "Closing this detestable window. Lets in too much salt air. 'Fraid you'll + get chilled. I am. Where's another blanket?" + </p> + <p> + The window went down with a bang, and we heard no more of our neighbors + that night. But the next morning the same thing began again, and I do not + believe that during that entire summer he ever agreed with his wife the + first time she spoke, nor failed to come around to her view after he took + time to think it over. I remember when I was introduced to him, a week + later, his wife said: "This is our nearest neighbor, you know, Thomas, and—" + </p> + <p> + "No, he isn't, Margaret; the people back of us are nearer," he said. Then + to me: "Pleased to meet you. I believe our wives have become quite good + friends. I'm very glad for Margaret's sake, too. It's dull for her with + only an old fellow like me to entertain her, and she not very well. And + then, as she says, you are our nearest neighbor, and we really ought not + to be too ceremonious at such a place as this." + </p> + <p> + "I thought, Thomas," suggested his wife, "that you said one could not be + too particular. Why, you quite blustered when I first told you I had made + advances to some of the other—" + </p> + <p> + "Nonsense! I did nothing of the kind," broke in he. "What on earth ever + put such an idea into your head, Margaret? You know I always say that + without pleasant neighbors, and friendly relations with them, a summer + cottage is no place for a white man to live." + </p> + <p> + My wife hastened to change the subject. Nothing on earth is more + distasteful to her than a family contest, of even a very mild type, + especially when the tones of voice seem to express more of indignation and + a desire to override, than a mere difference of opinion. She thought the + surf a safe subject. + </p> + <p> + "Was not the water lovely to-day? You were in, I suppose?" she inquired of + our neighbor's wife. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, we were in," she began, enthusiastically. "It was perfect and—" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know what you call perfect," broke in he, "I called it beastly. + It was so cold I felt like a frog when I got out, and you looked half + frozen. The fact is, this is too far north to bathe for pleasure in the + surf. It may be good for one's health, but it is anything but pleasant. + Now at Old Point Comfort it is different. I like it there." + </p> + <p> + "Why, James," said his wife, "I thought you preferred this because of the + more bracing and exhilarating effect." + </p> + <p> + After a little more objection, which he seemed to think firmly established + his independence, he ended his remarks thus: + </p> + <p> + "Of course, as you say, it is more bracing. Yes, that's a fact, Margaret. + I couldn't help noticing when I came out this morning that I felt like a + new man, and you—why, 'pon my word, you looked as bright and rosy as + a girl of sixteen. Oh, the surf here is great. It really is. I like it; + don't you?" + </p> + <p> + This last he had addressed to me. I was so occupied in a study of, and so + astonished by, the facility with which he took his mental flops, after + enjoying his little "kick," that I was taken off my feet by his sudden + appeal to me, and was quite at a loss for a reply which would do justice + to the occasion, and at the same time put a stop to the contest between + husband and wife. + </p> + <p> + But, as usual, my wife hastened to my rescue and covered my confusion by + her gay little laugh and explanation. + </p> + <p> + "Ha, ha, ha," she laughed, "you have caught my husband napping already. I + know exactly where he was. He was lumbering along through an elaborate + speculation on, and a comparison of, the relative merits of—" here + she began telling them off on her fingers to the great amusement of our + neighbors—"first, fresh and salt water bathing; second, the method, + time, place, and condition of each as affected by the moon, stars, and + Gulf Stream. He was, most likely, climbing over Norway with a thermometer, + or poking a test-tube of some kind into the semi-liquefaction which passes + itself off as water to those unfortunates who are stranded along the + shores of the Mississippi. Just wait; one of these days he will get down + to our discussion and he'll agree with us when he gets there. But don't + hurry him." + </p> + <p> + We all joined in the laugh at my expense; and I remarked that I had served + so long as a target for my wife's fun that even if I could skip around, + mentally, at as lively a rate as she seemed to expect, I would pretend + that I couldn't, in order not to deprive her of her chief source of + amusement. At this point our neighbor's new cook came to the edge of their + porch and asked her mistress if she might speak to her for a moment. She + arose to go. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, thunder, Margaret, I hope you don't intend to allow that worthless + girl to call you home every time you go any place. Tell her to wait. It + can't be much she wants," said our neighbor. + </p> + <p> + "Jane," said his wife sweetly, reseating herself, "you can wait until I + come home. It won't be long." + </p> + <p> + "I wonder if you'd better do that, Margaret," said he, just as our wives + had begun to discuss something relative to housekeeping. "Jane is a good + girl, and she wouldn't call you if it were not something important, Don't + you think we had better go at once?" + </p> + <p> + "I did think so," said she, and bidding us goodnight our neighbors crossed + the lawn and re-entered their own door and closed it for the night. + </p> + <p> + After a long pause my wife said, in a stage whisper: "I suppose it is his + way of showing that he is 'boss,' as the boys say—the final appeal + in his own household—his idea of the dignity of the masculine + prerogative." + </p> + <p> + A sudden stop. I thought she expected me to say something, so I began: + </p> + <p> + "I don't know. I doubt it. It looks to me like a case of—" + </p> + <p> + "Don't! don't!" exclaimed my wife, in tragic accents "oh, <i>don't</i> + catch it. I really couldn't live with a chronic objector. Anything else. I + really believe I could stand any other phase of bullying better than that—to + feel that at any minute I am liable to run against a solid wall of 'I + don't agree with you!' If it were <i>real</i> I wouldn't mind it so much; + but to hear that man 'kick,' as you say, just for the sake of asserting + himself, and then come around as he does, is perfectly maddening. The very + first symptom I see in you I shall look upon it as a danger signal—I'll + move." + </p> + <p> + At that moment, before our quiet little laugh, at their expense, had died + away, there floated out from the bedroom window of our neighbors' cottage, + this refrain: + </p> + <p> + "Well, goodness knows, Margaret, <i>I</i> didn't want to come home. I knew + it was all perfect nonsense. If you—" + </p> + <p> + My wife suddenly arose, took me by the hand and said quite seriously: + "Come in the house, dear. This atmosphere is too unwholesome to endure any + longer." + </p> + <p> + The next day she said to me, "Let's go to Old Point Comfort next year." + </p> + <p> + "All right," said I; "but what shall we do with the cottage? You know we + hold the lease for another year, with the 'refusal' to buy." + </p> + <p> + "Rent it to your worst enemy, or, better still, get him to buy it. Just + think of the exquisite revenge you could take that way. Twenty-four hours + every day, for four long months each year, to know that you had him + planted next door to a 'chronic kicker.' Or don't you hate anybody bad + enough for that?" and my wife actually shuddered. + </p> + <p> + "I don't believe I do, dear," said I; "but I'll do my level best to <i>rent</i> + it to him for one season. You know I wouldn't care to murder him; if he's + hopelessly maimed I'll be satisfied." + </p> + <p> + We both laughed; but the next day I advertised the lease of a cottage for + sale very cheap, and gave as a reason my desire to go where there were + fewer people. I think this will catch my enemy. He likes a crowd, and he'd + enjoy nothing better than to feel that I was forced to pay half of his + rent. So I marked the paper and sent it to him, and confidently await the + result. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0010" id="link2H_4_0010"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + FOR THE PROSECUTION. + </h2> + <p> + <i>"So deeply inherent is it in this life of ours that men have to suffer + for each other's sins, so inevitably diffusive is human sufferings that + even Justice makes its victims, and we can conceive no retribution that + does not spread beyond its mark in pulsations of unmerited pain."</i>—George + Eliot. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0011" id="link2H_4_0011"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + I. + </h2> + <p> + Shortly after Fred Mathews began the practice of law he was elected to the + office of Prosecuting Attorney in the Western town to which he had gone + when first admitted to the bar. + </p> + <p> + Of course, every law student becomes familiar with the jests and gibes + cast at the members of the profession as men who are peculiarly economical + of the truth. He smiles with those who hint that a lawyer is always lavish + of advice that leads to litigation. + </p> + <p> + That students of Blackstone and Coke hear much merrymaking over and some + serious criticism of the quibbles to which the best of them are supposed + to resort—of making little of real evidence and much of trivialities—goes + without saying. Nor are they unaware of the fact—alas! sometimes too + well founded upon strong evidence—that the general public appears to + be convinced that laws are made for the purpose of shielding the rich and + oppressing the poor or unfortunate. + </p> + <p> + No student of average ability enters practice uninformed that there is a + widespread belief that a man of social position or financial power has + little to fear as a result of his misdeeds, while his less fortunate + neighbor could not hope to escape the worst legal consequences of his most + trivial lapse from rectitude. + </p> + <p> + Fred Mathews had made up his mind—as many a young fellow had done + before him—that he would do everything in his power to hold the + scales of justice level. + </p> + <p> + He determined that such ability as he possessed should be used for the + benefit of society, and that neither bribe nor threat should ever entice + him from the strict performance of his duty to the profession which he had + entered. He would never accept a case in which he did not honestly + believe. No man's money should buy him and no man's wrath intimidate. In + short, he intended to be a lawyer with a conscience as well as a man of + integrity, no matter what the result might be. + </p> + <p> + He made so good a beginning in the first two years of his practice that it + was at the end of the third, when he found himself holding the office of + Prosecuting Attorney, with a record clean, and fair sailing ahead, that a + piece of news which came to him caused him to doubt himself for the first + time. + </p> + <p> + The shock of that doubt thrilled every fibre in his nature, for with it + came the one fear that is terrible to a brave mind which is aroused for + the first time to its own possibilities—the fear to trust itself—the + dread lest it betray its own higher nature under the pressure of old + habits of thought or new social problems. + </p> + <p> + Right and wrong had always seemed to him to have the most decided and + clear-cut outlines. He had never thought of himself as standing before + them unable to distinguish their boundaries. He had felt that he could + answer bravely enough the question: "What would you do if required to + choose between honor and dishonor?" It was a strange thing to him that his + present perplexity should grow out of a simple burglary case. There did + not appear to him, at first, to be more than one side to such a case. He + was the Prosecuting Attorney. A store had been robbed. Among other things + a sealskin sacque was taken. By means of this cloak the burglary had been + traced—it was claimed—to a certain young man high in social + life. The duties of his office had led the State's attorney to prosecute + the investigation with his usual vigor and impartiality until he had + succeeded beyond his fairest hopes. Indeed, the chain of evidence now in + his possession was so strong and complete that he—for the first time + in his career—recognized that he shrank from using the testimony at + his command. + </p> + <p> + He felt that it was his duty to cause to be apprehended a young man who + had up to the present time borne a spotless reputation; who had been a + fellow student at college; whose social position was that of a leader, and + who was soon to marry one of the most charming girls in the town. The + situation was painful, but Fred Mathews felt that his own honor was at + stake quite as truly as was that of his old schoolfellow. Here was his + first opportunity to show that he held his duty above his desires. Here + was the first case in which social influence and financial power were on + the side of a criminal whom it was his duty to prosecute to the end. + </p> + <p> + His professional pride, as well as his honor, was enlisted; for this was + the third burglary which had been committed recently, and so far the + "gang"—as the newspapers assumed and the police believed the + offenders to be—had not been caught. + </p> + <p> + Fred Mathews now thought he had every reason to believe that the same hand + had executed all three crimes and that the recklessness of the last—the + almost Wanton defiance of perfectly natural means of precaution and + concealment—had led to the discovery of this burglar in high life. + </p> + <p> + After long deliberation, however, the young prosecutor made up his mind + that he would so far compromise with his conscience as to make a personal, + private call upon the young man who was under suspicion and boldly accuse + him of the theft of the tell-tale cloak that had been traced to him, and + take the consequences. + </p> + <p> + He was well aware that in case this course should lead to the escape of + the criminal he would be compelled to bear the abuse and suspicion which + would surely follow, for the evidence had passed through other hands than + his own. + </p> + <p> + He knew that he was taking a method which would be called in question, and + that he would not take it if the suspected man lived in a less fashionable + street or had the misfortune to be low born. + </p> + <p> + All this he knew quite well, and still he argued to himself that it was + the right thing for him to do, or at least that it was the best possible + under the circumstances, and that after giving Walter Banks a private + chance to clear himself—if such a thing were possible—he would + still be in a position to go on with the case, if that should be + necessary. + </p> + <p> + That night, for the first time in his career, he allowed himself to be + kept awake, not by the fear that he should fail through inexperience in + his duty to his client—as had happened sometimes to trouble him + earlier in his professional life—but by a dread that he should + wilfully betray his trust to the public. At two o'clock he lay staring at + the wall, asking himself if he was becoming corrupt; if he, too, believed + in shielding guilt if only that guilt were dressed in purple and spoke + with a soft and cultured accent. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0012" id="link2H_4_0012"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + II. + </h2> + <p> + "Mr. Banks will be down in a moment;" the trim maid had said, and left the + library door open as she withdrew. + </p> + <p> + The young prosecutor walked about the room uneasily. He had hoped at the + last moment that the object of his call would be from home—that he + would take fright and refuse to be seen—that action had been taken + by the police which would put it out of his power to give the warning that + he now felt he was here to give. But, no. "Mr. Banks will be down in a + moment." He had heard quite distinctly, and there had not been the + slightest accent of fear or annoyance in the voice that spoke. + </p> + <p> + In his agitation he had taken up a curiously wrought paper knife which lay + upon the table and had dropped it as if it had burned his fingers. + </p> + <p> + "Good God!" he exclaimed. "<i>He</i> was the college thief. It is no new + thing, then." + </p> + <p> + He took up the knife again and examined it closely. There could be no + mistake. It was a gold wrought, elaborately engraved blade, set in a + handle which had no duplicate, for the students, who had planned the gift + which had so mysteriously disappeared had devised and caused to be + engraved a secret symbol which was cut deep in the polished surface. + </p> + <p> + It was to have been a surprise for one of the favorites in the faculty. It + had disappeared—and here it was! + </p> + <p> + "Good morning, Mathews. This is really very kind. I—" + </p> + <p> + It was the voice of Walter Banks, but their eyes met over the fallen paper + knife, which had dropped from trembling fingers at the first word. + </p> + <p> + A great wave of color rushed into the face of young Banks. The prosecutor + stood mute and pale. Involuntarily he had tried to cover the knife with a + corner of the rug as he turned to meet his host. It vaguely dawned upon + him that he was a guest in a house where he was playing the part of a + detective. His hand was extended in the hearty western fashion which had + become second nature to him, but Walter Banks did not take it. + </p> + <p> + "Will you sit down?" said the host in a tone which was hoarse, and quite + unlike the frank, free voice that spoke a moment before. + </p> + <p> + As he seated himself he bent forward and took up the bit of tell-tale gold + and ivory. Then he said, slowly in a tone that was scarcely audible: + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I took it. You are right. It <i>is</i> the college knife." + </p> + <p> + "Don't! don't!" exclaimed Fred Mathews, rising. "I am— You forget— + I am— My office. Think. I am for the prosecution!" His face was + livid. Young Banks leaned heavily against the table. The color began to + die out of his lips. His hand trembled as he laid the knife upon the + table. Neither spoke. The brain of the young prosecutor found only scraps + and shreds of thought, in which such words as duty, honor, pity, + hospitality, wealth, social order, floated vaguely here and there, + buffeted by the one insistent idea that he should go—go quickly—and + leave this man alone with his shame and humiliation. + </p> + <p> + Walter Banks was the first to speak. + </p> + <p> + "Come up to my room. Mother might come in here and—I suppose—you + have come about— I—Is—? You say you are for the + prosecution. Have they traced the cloak to me?" + </p> + <p> + The lawyer stepped back again and looked at the man before him. What could + he mean by saying such a thing as that—<i>to him?</i> They had never + been close friends, but now in spite of everything the thought that he was + the prosecutor kept itself steadily in the attorney's mind and struggled + with a pity and reluctance that were seeking to justify him by a belief in + the insanity of young Banks. + </p> + <p> + No one but a lunatic would have made that last remark. The thought was a + relief. He grasped at it eagerly and began to fashion his mental outlook + to fit the idea. Then suddenly came to him with overwhelming force all he + had ever heard or read of the failure of justice where criminals of high + degree were concerned. + </p> + <p> + He had followed his host to the stairs. Suddenly he turned, caught up his + hat from the stand where he had left it, and passed out of the street door + without a word. Once in the street he glanced involuntarily up at the + house. At the window of the room he had just left stood Walter Banks. His + arm was about his mother's shoulders, and both were very pale. There was a + strange likeness between them. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0013" id="link2H_4_0013"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + III. + </h2> + <p> + Every conceivable form of pressure to prevent the trial of Walter Banks + was brought to bear in the next few weeks; but Prosecutor Mathews had + pushed the case vigorously in spite of it all. He felt not only that + justice was at stake, but that his own moral fibre was in pawn, as well. + He held aloof from his social friends—who were in many cases the + friends of the accused, also—lest he lose sight of his duty through + some fresh or new form of attack upon his integrity of purpose. + </p> + <p> + It had come to his knowledge that even the Judge who was to sit in the + case had been approached by the friends of the defendant, and it was felt + that it would be difficult to impanel a jury that would or could be fair + and impartial. + </p> + <p> + If but one man was drawn from the "upper class," the jury would be sure to + hang. On the other hand, if all of the talesmen were chosen from that + social caste which feels that it is usually the victim, it would go hard + with Walter Banks even if he were able—as seemed wholly unlikely—to + show a reasonably clear case in his favor. + </p> + <p> + The day came. The court-room held an unusual audience. There were many + ladies present who had never before seen the inside of such a room. They + held their breath and were filled with awe and fear—of they knew not + what. + </p> + <p> + Perhaps few men can realize what it is to a woman to face for the first + time the embodiment of all that her strong faith and utter ignorance has + carried to mature years as an ideal of justice and dignity—of solemn + obligation and fearful responsibility. To her there has been no reverse + side to the picture. She believes in courts as courts of justice. She + knows nothing of quibble, of technicality, of precedent. Nothing here is + light or humorous to her. Next to a death chamber the criminal court-room + is fullest of the thoughts which reach beyond mere human responsibility + and import, and all that passes there is freighted for her with a sense of + finality that few men can comprehend. <i>They</i> think of reversal of + judgment. + </p> + <p> + The fiat of the court is the closing knell to a woman; and although she + may know the judge in private life to be a fallible or—more + incongruous still—a jovial man, his presence <i>here</i> is + overpowering. Of the jury she feels vaguely, dread. Of the judge, awe. + </p> + <p> + The mother of the prisoner sat near him. Her sad, pale, refined face + troubled the young prosecutor sorely and he tugged at his conscience and + spurred on his resolution after each glance at her. + </p> + <p> + The case was so plain, the evidence so clear, the defence so weak that the + whole tide of public sentiment swung rapidly from the side of the prisoner + to that of the people. + </p> + <p> + The indignation for him which had been felt by the society women who had + come to show themselves as his friends changed into scorn and contempt. + The whole mental atmosphere of the room underwent a revolution. When court + opened few besides the officers believed him guilty. As the case drew near + its close no one believed him innocent. He had not been allowed by his + counsel to take the stand in his own behalf, and this had told strongly + against him in the minds of both jury and spectators. The prosecuting + attorney had made a telling speech, and the charge of the judge was + plainly indicative of his opinion that there was but one verdict to give. + </p> + <p> + The jury had taken but one ballot. They had needed no charge from the + judge at all. + </p> + <p> + "Guilty,"—came from the foreman's lips with a decided accent that + indicated a certain satisfaction in pronouncing it. The prisoner's face + grew a shade paler, but the puzzled light in his eyes lost nothing of that + weary, insistent questioning that had marked their depths all day. Indeed, + he seemed to be as much surprised, as the evidence had been unfolded, as + were the friends who were there to see him vindicated. + </p> + <p> + During the speech of the prosecutor and the charge of the judge young + Banks; mother had held her son's hand and tears had dropped unheeded from + her eyes. + </p> + <p> + The judge had spoken again, but no one moved. The attorney for the + prisoner bent forward and touched him on the shoulder. + </p> + <p> + "Stand up for sentence," he said. "The judge"— + </p> + <p> + "Sit still!" It was the woman beside him who spoke. She had dried her + tears. Every face in the room was turned toward her now. She staggered to + her feet. Her voice penetrated every corner of the room. + </p> + <p> + "<i>I</i> am the thief, judge. Sentence me. I stole the cloak!" + </p> + <p> + "Mother, mother! Great God, it is not true! Mother, sit down! She never + saw the coat. Mother! Mother! Great God, what does it mean?" + </p> + <p> + The young fellow had sprung to his feet, but she eluded his grasp, and + before any one knew what she intended to do she passed onto the witness + stand. + </p> + <p> + There was a tense silence in the room. No one was prepared for the scene. + It had been so swiftly done—so wholly without warning—that + every one sat dumb. + </p> + <p> + She had caught up the Bible as she reached the stand and pressed it to her + lips. She was vaguely aware that this act was looked upon as affecting the + credibility of the witness. She also imagined that it gave her a right to + put in her evidence even at this stage of the trial. She supposed that a + trial was for the purpose of arriving at the facts and that the Court sat + with that object alone in view. She did not know that it was too late. She + was unaware that the case would have to be reopened to admit her evidence. + She did not know that it was possible for the gate of justice to be swung + shut in the face of truth. She supposed that all trials were for the one + purpose of getting at the bottom of the case; so that it did not occur to + her that her action was strange only in so far as such a confession from + such a woman must be so regarded by all who knew her, and who was there in + all the town who did not know and respect her? + </p> + <p> + The young prosecutor sat mute. The eyes of the judge widened in + astonishment. For the moment he was the man and neighbor only. He forgot + his office. She was talking rapidly, and all were listening. + </p> + <p> + "I am the thief, judge. Let me tell you. It is not right that he should + suffer for my crime. Poor boy, his life has been a hell on earth for <i>me—for + me!</i> And he has never understood. I could not tell him. I shall now. He + shall understand. <i>You</i> shall, judge. Oh, God, if only a woman sat + where you do—a mother! But let me tell you; I can. I thought I could + not; but I can—even to <i>these</i> gentlemen." She waved her hand + toward the jury and there was a widening of her nostrils as if her breath + and courage were leaving her. "Rather than have him punished, disgraced, + ruined, I can tell it all. He is <i>not</i> guilty. It is I! It is I!" She + put her trembling hands to her temples and her eyes were those of a hunted + creature at bay. + </p> + <p> + "Before he came into the world—you'll let me tell you frankly, + judge? <i>I must</i>. Before he came into the world I made him what he is—a + thief. Did I or did his father? It was like this. I am ashamed to tell it, + but, oh, judge, I <i>loved</i> him, and I longed to make the pretty things + and buy the dainty ones that would make his soft, white, dimpled flesh + look sweeter when he should lie before me. His father was—you knew + his father, judge. He was a good man, but— You know how he loved + money—and power. He— I— I was the pauper most young + wives are. I was too proud to ask for money, and if I <i>had</i> asked + often— But I was too proud, so, perhaps, I need not tell about the + if. Most women know it, and— You could not understand." + </p> + <p> + She paused. A panic had overtaken her nerves. She was becoming vaguely + conscious of her position. Her eyes wandered over the room; but when they + fell upon her son, sitting with his wretched face pinched and startled, + with his deep eyes staring at her, her courage came again. + </p> + <p> + "At first I had no thought of theft. I used to go each night after my + husband fell asleep and take a little money from his pocket. Only a + little. He never missed it—never. So he used to whip the boy for + stealing afterward and said he would disgrace us and— I never told + him even then. Life was horrible. The growing certainty maddened me. He + would steal anything, everything about the house, even his own things. He + did not understand himself and he could not help it; but I did not think + it would ever come to <i>this</i>—through me—<i>through me!</i>" + </p> + <p> + She calmed herself again suddenly by a glance at her son. + </p> + <p> + "Every night I took only a little money. My motive was a good one. I knew + my husband did not understand how I longed to get the pretty things. How— + Of course in one sense I had a right to the money. He was rich even then, + but—I <i>felt</i> myself a—pauper—and a thief. + </p> + <p> + "I— Do you think young mothers should be young paupers, judge? I've + sometimes thought that if they were not there might be less use for courts + like this—and prisons. + </p> + <p> + "I've sometimes thought if mothers sat on juries they'd know the reasons + why for crime and wrong and, maybe, work to cure the causes of the crimes + rather than simply punish those who have committed them blindly—<i>often + blindly</i>. + </p> + <p> + "I've sometimes thought the cost—in money—would be less; and + then the cost in love and sorrow! Oh, judge, be patient just a little + longer. Do not let them stop me. It means so much to <i>us!</i> I'll go + back to the point. I'll tell the truth—all of it—all. But it + is hard to do it—here. + </p> + <p> + "I bought the little wardrobe; but remember, judge, the months and months + of daily building, bone on bone, fibre within fibre, thought on thought + that is moulded into shape for human beings! + </p> + <p> + "I knew your father, judge. Your eyes are like his, but all your mental + life—your temperament—you got from other blood than filled his + veins. + </p> + <p> + "Your father's mother gave you your character. Your gentle heart is hers—your + patient thoughtfulness. I knew her well. I knew your mother, too. She was + the teacher of my motherhood. It was to her I told the truth in my boy's + childhood—when I first began to realize or fear what I had done. You + owe it all to her that you are strong and true. She understood in time—and + now you sit in judgment on my boy, whose mother learned from yours too + late the meaning and the danger of it all. She saved my other children. I + killed my pride for them. <i>I asked for money</i>. The others may be <i>beggars</i> + some day—they never will be thieves. + </p> + <p> + "That boy has never asked a favor. He simply cannot. His pride was always + stronger than anything—anything except his love for me. + </p> + <p> + "I knit that in his blood too. I loved him so I made myself a thief for + him. Of course I did not know—I did not understand the awful danger + then; but— A young mother—I—it is hard to tell it here. + You will not understand—you cannot. Oh, God, for a mother on the + jury! A mother on the bench!" + </p> + <p> + She caught at her escaping courage again. The officer whose duty it was to + take her away moved forward a second time, and a second time the judge + motioned him back. She had been his mother's friend ever since he could + remember, and the ordinary discipline of the court was not for her. He + would do his duty, he said to himself, but surely there was no haste. All + this was irregular, of course, but if something should come of it that + gave excuse for a new trial no one would be more thankful than he. + </p> + <p> + "Young mothers are so ignorant. They know so little of all the things of + which they should know much. They are so helpless. Judge, there will be + criminal courts and prisons—oh, so many of both—just as long + as motherhood is ignorant and helpless and swayed by feeling only. Don't + you know it is ignorance and feeling that leads to crime? If people only + understood! If only they were able to think it out to what it means, + crimes would not be—but they cannot, they cannot! Those trembling + lips you see before you are no more truly a copy of mine—the boy is + as responsible for the set and curve of those lips—as he is for his + hopeless fault. He has stolen from his infancy; but I, not he, am the + thief. Now sentence the real criminal, judge. Courts are to punish the + guilty—not to further curse the helpless victims. I am the criminal + here. Sentence me!" + </p> + <p> + "Mother! Mother! I never understood my-self before! Oh, mother, mother!" + </p> + <p> + It was a wild cry from Walter Banks as his mother had risen asking for + sentence on herself. He sprang forward, forgetting everything and took her + in his arms. There was a great stir in the room. + </p> + <p> + "Silence in the court!" + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Banks had fainted. Her son helped to carry her into another room. No + one attempted to prevent him. The young prosecutor returned with him and + stood dumb before the court. + </p> + <p> + "I am ready for sentence, your Honor. I committed the burglary." It was + the voice of the prisoner. He was standing with his arms folded and his + eyes cast down. Silence fell in the room. The women ceased to sob. There + was an uneasy movement in the jury box. + </p> + <p> + "In view of the new evidence—" began the foreman but the voice of + the judge, slow and steady, filled the room. + </p> + <p> + "It is the sentence of this court that you, Walter Banks, be confined at + hard labor in the state penitentiary for the term of four years." + </p> + <p> + The prisoner bowed and turned a shade paler. + </p> + <p> + "Do not tell mother that until she is better," he said to his attorney and + passed out in the custody of the sheriff. + </p> + <p> + "And at the end of four years, what!" a lady was saying to the young + prosecutor as the room slowly emptied. + </p> + <p> + "The brute!" was hurled after the judge by another, as his form vanished + through the door. + </p> + <p> + "Shows that law is not for the poor alone—" + </p> + <p> + "Good things for social order and—" + </p> + <p> + "Well, yes, I'm rather disappointed; but of course a judge can't go behind + the returns." + </p> + <p> + "Evidence all one way if—" + </p> + <p> + "Heavens, what a scene!" + </p> + <p> + "—my opinion no woman should ever be admitted to a court room except + as a prisoner. It—" + </p> + <p> + "Feather in the cap of the prosecutor." + </p> + <p> + "—re-election sure enough now." + </p> + <p> + "Whole thing in a nutshell—" + </p> + <p> + "Simple question. <i>Did</i> he commit the burglary? If so—" + </p> + <p> + The young prosecutor hurried away from the sound of these voices and the + congratulations of his political friends. He was mentally sore and + perplexed because he had won his case. + </p> + <p> + That night he called upon the prisoner for the second time. + </p> + <p> + "I have made up' my mind to resign my office," he said, not looking at the + convict, who had risen to receive him. + </p> + <p> + Walter Banks was by far the calmer of the two, but he did not speak. + </p> + <p> + "I shall never be able to act for the prosecution again. I thought this + case was so clear. My duty seemed so plain—too plain to admit of + anything but the most vigorous course of action; but—" + </p> + <p> + "You did nothing but your duty, Mathews. We are all victims I suppose—one + way or another. You are going to be the victim of your sensitive + conscience. The result will be a course of vacillation that will ruin your + chances of success. I am sorry. You've got all the elements for a leader—only + you've got a conscience. That settles it. A bit of heredity like that is + as fatal as—as mine." He bit his lips. + </p> + <p> + "Don't let your part in my case worry you. The game of life has gone + against me. That is all. The dice were loaded before I ever got hold of + them. I did what I could to out-live—out-fight my awful—inheritance. + I wasn't strong enough. It got the best of me. Nature is a terrible + antagonist. Perhaps now that I understand myself better I shall be able to + keep a firmer hold. You did your duty, Mathews; good-by. Be— Can't + you be a little kind to mother? She suffers so. Her punishment is double—and + her crime was ignorance!" + </p> + <p> + This time he took the hand that was held out to him. + </p> + <p> + "Only ignorance," he added. "It seems an awful punishment for that." + </p> + <p> + "Ignorance—and poverty and love," said the young prosecutor as the + door closed behind him, "and Nature did the rest! What a grip is at our + throats! And how we help blind Nature in her cruel work by laws and + customs and conditions! What a little way we've come from barbarism yet! + How slow we travel. But we are moving," he added with a deep sigh. "Moving + a little. There is light ahead. If not for us, then for those who come + after." + </p> + <p> + He heard the bolt slip behind him and shuddered. + </p> + <p> + "It might as easily have been I," he mused as he went down the steps, and + shuddered again. + </p> + <p> + "I doubt if it was fault of his or virtue of mine that determined which of + us two should be the prosecutor." + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0014" id="link2H_4_0014"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + A RUSTY LINK IN THE CHAIN. + </h2> + <p> + <i>"In the brainy that wondrous world with one inhabitant, there are + recesses dim and dark, treacherous sands and dangerous shores, where + seeming sirens tempt and fade; streams that rise in unknown lands from + hidden springs, strange seas with ebb and flow of tides, resistless + billows urged by storms of flame, profound and awful depths hidden by mist + of dreams, obscure and phantom realms where vague and fearful things are + half revealed, jungles where passion's tigers crouch, and skies of cloud + and hue where fancies fly with painted wings that dazzle and mislead; and + the poor sovereign of this pictured world is led by old desires and + ancient hates, and stained by crimes of many vanished years, and pushed by + hands that long ago were dust, until he feels like some bewildered slave + that Mockery has throned and crowned."</i> + </p> + <p> + Ingersoll. + </p> +<div style="height: 1em;"> + <br /> + </div> + <p> + When I called, last Sunday afternoon, as was my habit, upon my old college + friend—now a distinguished physician—I found him sitting in + his office holding in his hand a letter. His manner was unusually grave + and, I thought, troubled. I asked him, laughingly, if he had had bad news + from beyond the seas—from his Castle in Spain. + </p> + <p> + "No, it is worse than that, I fear," he said gravely. "It looks to me very + much like bad news from beyond the grave—from the Castle of Heredity + in the realm of an Ancestor." + </p> + <p> + "I hope, doctor, that you have not had,—that my little jest was not + a cruel touch upon a real hurt." + </p> + <p> + "Not at all, not at all, old fellow," he said, smiling a little. + </p> + <p> + "It is not my own trouble at all; but—well, it set me to thinking + strange thoughts. Shall I tell you about it? I should really like to know + just how it would impress you—an intelligent man out of the + profession." + </p> + <p> + He placed the letter on the table beside him, looked at me steadily for a + moment, and then began: + </p> + <p> + "It may be as well to say that I have never before ventured to tell the + story of George Wetherell's curious experience, simply because I have + always felt certain that to a really intelligent and well-in-formed + physician it would be a comparatively familiar, and not specially + startling (although a wholly uncomprehended) phase of human disorder; + while to many, not of the profession, it would appear to involve such + fearful and far-reaching results, that they would either refuse to believe + it possible at all, or else jump to the conclusion that numerous cases + which have only some slight point of similarity are to be classed with it + and explained upon the same basis. + </p> + <p> + "In regard to these latter persons, I do not intend to convey the + impression that I am either ambitious to shield them from the consequences + of their own nimble and unguarded reckonings, or that by my silence in + this particular instance I suppose that I have prevented them from forming + quite as erroneous opinions founded upon some other equally misunderstood + and ill-digested scrap of psychological and medical information. + </p> + <p> + "But it has sometimes seemed to me that there were certain features + connected with the case of George Wetherell which, in the hands of the + ignorant or unscrupulous, might easily be used to the disadvantage of + their fellow-beings, and I have therefore hesitated to lay it before any + one who was not, in my opinion, both intelligent and honorable enough to + accept it as one of the strange manifestations in an individual + experience; and to understand, because of the innumerable conditions of + mental and physical heredity—which were not likely ever to occur + again in the same proportions—that therefore the same manifestations + were, not to be looked for in a sufficient number of persons to ever make + this case in any sense a type or a guide. + </p> + <p> + "Notwithstanding this, there are, as I said in the first place, certain + features connected with it which many members of the medical profession + will recognize; but they are none the less puzzling symptoms. + </p> + <p> + "The matter has been brought back with unusual force to my mind at this + time, by a circumstance connected with one of Wetherell's children, which + is detailed in this letter. It lends a new touch of interest to the malady + of the father. To enable you to obtain even a fairly comprehensive idea of + the strange development, it will be necessary for me to tell you, first, + something about the man and his surroundings. + </p> + <p> + "To be as brief as I may, then, he was the son of a merry, whole-souled, + stout, and, withal, mentally alert, Southern gentleman, who had taken the + law into his own hands and duly scandalized the reputable part of the + community in which he lived by giving his slaves (all of whom he or his + wife had inherited) their freedom at a time and under circumstances which + made it necessary for him to betake himself with some considerable + alacrity to a part of the country where it was looked upon as respectable + to pay for the voluntary services of one's fellowmen, rather than to pay + for the man himself with the expectation that the services were to be + thrown in. + </p> + <p> + "Of course it was imperative—not only for the peace, but for the + safety of all parties concerned—for him to transport both his family + and his freed-men to a place where it was at once honorable for a white + man to do such a deed and for a black man to own himself. This he did; and + while a number of the negroes remained in the service of the family, the + son (on whose account, and to prevent whom from believing in and being + enervated by the possession of slaves the step had, in great measure, been + taken) had grown to manhood with a curious mingling of Southern sympathies + and Northern reasoning and convictions. + </p> + <p> + "The outbreak of the war found the young fellow struggling bravely, with + all the fire and energy of a peculiarly gifted nature, to establish a + newspaper in a border State, and to convince his readers that the + extension of slavery would be a grave calamity, not only for the owned but + for the owner. + </p> + <p> + "His two associates were Eastern college-bred men, and it was therefore + deemed wisest to push young Wetherell forward as the special champion of + free soil, under the illusion that his Southern birth and sympathies would + win for him a more ready and kindly hearing on a subject which at that + time was a dangerous one to handle freely, especially in the border-land + then under dispute. + </p> + <p> + "But the three young enthusiasts had reckoned, as young people will, upon + a certain degree of reason about, and calm discussion of, a question which + at that time they still recognized as having two very strong and serious + sides; for they had not taken the stand of the Abolition party at all. + They called themselves free-soil Democrats, and were simply arguing + against the extension of an institution which they were not yet prepared + to believe it wise to attempt to abolish where it was already established, + and where there was seemingly no other peaceable or fair solution than the + one of limitation and gradual emancipation, through the process of mental + and moral development of the ruling race. This position was not an + unnatural one, surely, for young Wetherell, and was only what might have + been expected from the son of a man who had given practical demonstration + of the possibility of such evolution in the slave-holding and + slave-dependent class. + </p> + <p> + "But, as I have intimated, the confidence and reasonableness of youth had + led to a complete misconception as to the temper of the opposition. It is + quite possible that the frank, passionate, free-soil editorials, if they + had come from either of the Eastern men, might have been accepted as the + delusions of youth, the prejudice of section, or, at worst, as the + arguments of partisans; but from a man of Southern birth—the son of + a law-breaker (you must remember that the enfranchisement of the slaves + had been a serious infraction of the law, strange as that sounds to the + ears of the present generation)—from the son of such a man they + could mean only a malicious desire to stir up strife and cause bloodshed + by making restless slaves dangerous and dangerous slaves desperate. The + result was that one night, after the issue of a paper containing an + article of unusual force and power, young Wetherell found himself startled + from a sound sleep, in the back room of his office, by the smell of smoke + and gleam of flame. + </p> + <p> + "He understood their significance at a glance, and knew that escape by the + front door meant a reception by masked men, five minutes for prayer, and—a + rope. + </p> + <p> + "Springing from the back window into the river, he swam to the other + shore, and within a few days raised the first regiment of volunteers that + the State sent in response to the call of the President, and cut adrift at + once and forever from all effort to argue the case from an ethical or a + financial outlook. + </p> + <p> + "It is more than likely that anger may have had something to do with his + sudden conversion from a 'peace and argument,' to first a 'war Democrat,' + and shortly thereafter to a Republican; but be that as it may, it is + certain that at such crises as these, mental activity is spurred and + radical changes are made with a rapidity and decision astonishing to + contemplate in periods of quiet and peace. + </p> + <p> + "So it came about that this lad of twenty-three suddenly found himself at + the head of a regiment of somewhat desperate border men, most of whom were + more than twice his own age, wildly charging a battery in one of the first + battles of the war. + </p> + <p> + "He received three wounds, one of which was a slight abrasion of the + scalp, not looked upon as more than a scratch by either the surgeon or + himself; indeed, it would hardly be worth mentioning but for the strange + events which followed. Whether this wound had anything to do with the + condition of which I am about to tell, you will have to decide for + yourself; but I must warn you, in the beginning, that there was nothing + like a fracture of the skull, and the little path made by the bullet + through the scalp healed without trouble, almost without attention, and + never afterward gave the slightest pain. + </p> + <p> + "The hair, it is true, did not grow again over the parting, and, as it was + nearly in the middle of his head, it made him an involuntary follower of + the fashion of a certain effeminate type of youths for whom he had an + overwhelming contempt. Neither of the other two wounds was serious, and + after a very short period in the hospital he reported for duty, was + promoted, and given sole charge of a post of considerable importance. + </p> + <p> + "Shortly thereafter his father received a some what discomposing telegram. + He had previously had several more or less lucid despatches from his son + while the patient was still in the hospital; but any lack of clearness in + their wording had been attributed to haste or to carelessness in the + transmission, and as they all indicated rapid recovery, no undue anxiety + had been felt. But the message in question now produced the impression + that there was something wrong. It read: 'Send me one thousand swords + immediately.' + </p> + <p> + "After a few moments' consultation with the boy's mother, Mr. Wetherell + packed his hand-bag, and, armed with a letter from President Lincoln, + whose personal friend he was, started for the seat of war. + </p> + <p> + "Upon arriving at his destination, the son expressed no surprise whatever, + but much pleasure, at seeing his father. He asked, in the most natural and + affectionate way, about each member of the family, and then suddenly put + his hand to his head and appeared to be in deep thought. + </p> + <p> + "His eyes contracted in the manner peculiar to some persons when + attempting to recall a long-forgotten event; but in a moment this had + passed away and he appeared to be perfectly clear and natural. + </p> + <p> + "He attended to the affairs of his office in a manner which not only + escaped criticism, but won praise from his superiors, and conversed with + great freedom and marked intelligence on the stirring subjects of the + time. + </p> + <p> + "He had had some little fever while his wounds were fresh, but in no + degree to cause alarm, and even this had now almost entirely left him. In + short, he appeared to be in nearly perfect mental and physical health. + There was, however, one peculiarity which the father noticed as unfamiliar + in his son; but as it was not at all strange that so young a man—or + any man, indeed, who had suddenly been given control of matters of such + grave importance—should at times be very quiet and appear to be + struggling to recall some matter of moment, the habit was not given more + than passing attention, and it was not sufficiently marked to be noticed + at all by any one except a near relation. At these times young Wetherell + would contract his eyebrows, look steadily at some object near him,—as + the toe of his boot or the palm of his hand,—raise his head + suddenly, gaze at the distant horizon, bite his lip, and then appear to + either give it up or be satisfied with some mental solution of his puzzle. + </p> + <p> + "One day his father said: 'What is it, George?' + </p> + <p> + "The young fellow turned his eyes quickly upon his father and asked: + </p> + <p> + "'Have I forgotten anything? It seems to me there is something I just fail + to recall. I am on the edge of it constantly, but it slips. I can't get + quite enough hold on it to be sure what it is—or to be certain, + indeed, that it is anything. Can you think of anything I ought to do that + I have overlooked?' + </p> + <p> + "This all sounded natural enough, and was, seemingly, a condition not + unfamiliar to his father, so they began together going over the duties + pertaining to the son's office to see if, by a mischance, something had + been neglected. Everything was complete and in perfect order; but still + the look returned from time to time, until it became almost habitual. + </p> + <p> + "This was ten days after his father had reached camp, and his plan was to + leave for home that afternoon; for, as I said, the boy's wounds were + almost entirely healed, and he appeared to be in need of nothing whatever. + More and more his superior officers called him into their councils, and + more and more his clear judgment was commended by them. + </p> + <p> + "He was to walk to the train with his father. The moment they were outside + the limits of the camp George remarked, casually, 'I must stop on the way + and order those swords.' + </p> + <p> + "The remark recalled the queer telegram which had caused Mr. Wetherell to + come to his son, the wording of which had been wholly obliterated from his + mind by their meeting. + </p> + <p> + "'What swords?' inquired his father, now on the alert again. + </p> + <p> + "The young fellow turned and looked at his father for a moment, and then + said: 'I don't know. It is a secret order. Don't mention it. The general + told me to order them. They are to be sent to me.' + </p> + <p> + "This all seemed probable enough to Mr. Wetherell, and yet he somehow + felt, rather than saw, a queer change in his son's eyes, which he thought + he had noticed once or twice before. + </p> + <p> + "He decided not to return home for the present. + </p> + <p> + "When he told his son this, the boy took it quite as a matter of course, + and made no comment whatever on the sudden alteration of purpose. + </p> + <p> + "On the way back to camp George stepped into a military supply station and + ordered fourteen hundred swords to be delivered to him immediately. + </p> + <p> + "By this time his father had made up his mind that there were short + intervals in which the young colonel did not know exactly what he was + doing—or, rather, that while he did know and act intelligently—from + the outlook of the moment—it was a time wholly disconnected from the + rest of his life, and when the moment was past he had no farther + recollection of it. + </p> + <p> + "However, Mr. Wetherell was not sure enough of this to risk compromising a + probably brilliant future by a premature or unnecessarily public + announcement, and he therefore allowed the order to be made, and taken in + good faith, and walked back to camp with his son, who immediately went + about his duties in the most intelligent and scrupulously careful manner. + </p> + <p> + "Mr. Wetherell, however, made a call upon the officer in command the + moment he could do so without attracting attention; and after a long talk + (in which the secret sword order was discovered to be a delusion), it was + decided that the recently recovered invalid should retire from the field + on the sick leave, which he had previously refused to consider. + </p> + <p> + "When he was told of this arrangement, he agreed to it without a murmur, + and began, for the first time for many days, to have his wounds (which + were now past the need of it) dressed with much care. This he continued + every morning, but by the time they reached home he had become possessed + with the belief that his chief wound was in his side, where there had not + been a scratch. + </p> + <p> + "To humor him, the family physician applied bandages to the imaginary + injury every day regularly. + </p> + <p> + "All this time there was no clearer talker, no more acute reasoner, no + more simple, earnest, gentlemanly fellow to be found than Col. George + Wetherell, whom his townsmen were honoring and inducing to make public + speeches and write clear, firm, inspiring editorials for one of the + leading papers. No one except his own family and physician suspected for a + moment that he was not mentally as bright as he always had been, and even + the younger members of the family were without the least hint of it. + </p> + <p> + "Indeed, his father and the doctor both thought that his only illusion now + was a belief in the wound in his side. Several weeks passed, and even this + indication was losing its force, for he no longer required medical + attention, and was as well and as rational as ever in his life, so far as + any one could perceive, when one day a stranger appeared and asked for + him. Mr. Wetherell requested the gentleman (who was evidently laboring + under great excitement) to be seated, and at the same time made up his own + mind to be present during the interview. + </p> + <p> + "Colonel Wetherell was summoned, and, on entering the room, looked in a + startled way at the stranger, smiled vaguely, extended his hand, + contracted his eyes into a long, narrow line, turned white, and throwing + both arms suddenly above his head, exclaimed: 'My God! my God! what have I + done? Where am I? How long has it been? Is she dead? Is she dead?' and + staggered back into his father's arms. + </p> + <p> + "His distress was so manifest, that the visitor lost his severity at once, + and said quite gently: 'No, she is not dead; but she is almost insane with + fright, and has been so exhausted with anxiety and tears, that we had lost + all hope for her reason, or even for her life, unless I could find you. I + have been through the lines, was delayed by the loss of my passport, and + it is now five weeks since I saw her. She is alive, but—' + </p> + <p> + "Young Wetherell sprang to his feet, and turned on his father like a + madman. 'How dared you?' he demanded; 'how dared you keep back my letters? + You have killed her. You have murdered her, poor, delicate girl, with + anxiety and doubt of me.' And then with set teeth and white lips he + advanced upon his father, his arm uplifted, as if he held a sword, and + with a sweep which would have severed chords of steel, if the weapon had + really been within his grasp, he brought his arm across his father's + breast and sank upon the floor, senseless and still. + </p> + <p> + "Afterward, when he revived, he had no recollection of what had occurred, + except alone the fact that for many weeks previous he had forgotten + utterly the girl who was to be his wife, whose life and love were all his + world. While he had remembered everything else, had carefully attended to + the smallest details of daily life, the link of memory that held the fact + of her existence had been coated with a rust of absolute oblivion. The + single link in all the chain of memory that had failed him had been the + one the nearest to his heart—the dearest one of all! + </p> + <p> + "They were married two months later, and he resumed command of his + regiment. Through an honorable and eventful life no sign of mental lapse + ever returned; but every day he dreaded it, and watched his wife and + children as a man might do who saw a creeping monster back of those he + loved while he stood paralyzed and dumb. He never seemed to fear that + other things might lose their hold upon his consciousness; but the + apprehension that his mind would slip the link which held his wife, and + leave her sick and faint with anxious fears, which he alone could still, + constantly haunted him. + </p> + <p> + "His wounds never troubled him again. He died not long ago. His career was + an exceptionally brilliant one. You would know him if I had given his real + name, for it was in the public ear for years. + </p> + <p> + "There were but six persons who ever knew the history of his case, and + they are still unable to explain it—its cause, its direction, its + cure. Or is it cured? Will his children be subject to it? Will it take the + same form? Was it caused by the wound? by the fever? Or were hereditary + conditions so grouped as to produce this mental effect, even if there had + been no wound—no illness? If the latter, will it be transmitted? + These questions come to me with renewed force, to-day, as I hold in my + hand this letter, asking me to give the family history of Col. George + Wetherell for the use of physicians in a distant city who are now treating + his son. This son has reached the precise age at which his father had the + strange experience of which I have just told you. + </p> + <p> + "There is a hint in the letter which, in the light of the father's malady, + appears to a physician to be of peculiar importance from a medical + outlook. + </p> + <p> + "We shall see, we shall see." + </p> + <p> + There was a long pause; then he asked: "Should you, a layman, look to the + wound to explain the condition? Or to the Castle of Heredity? Suppose the + son's malady is quite similar—as now appears—what then?" + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0015" id="link2H_4_0015"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + THE BOLER HOUSE MYSTERY. + </h2> + <p> + <i>"What would you do? what would you say now, if you were in such a + position?"</i>—Thackeray. + </p> + <p> + <i>"Thackeray is always protesting that no good is to be done by blinking + the truth. Let us have facts out, and mend what is bad if we can"</i>—Trollope. + </p> +<div style="height: 1em;"> + <br /> + </div> + <p> + Mr. John Boler had been in the hotel business, as he phrased it, ever + since he was born. Before he could walk he had been the "feature" of his + father's summer hotel, where he was the only baby to be passed around and + hugged into semi-unconsciousness by all the women in the house. Because of + the scarcity of his kind, too, he was subjected to untold agony by the + male guests, most of whom appeared to believe that the chief desire of his + infantile heart was to be tossed skyward from hour to hour and caught in + upstretched hands as he descended with a sickening sense of insecurity and + a wild hysterical laugh. In these later years he often said that he would + like to know who those summer fiends were who had made his infancy so full + of narrow escapes from sudden and violent death. Finally he thought he had + revenge at hand. A benevolent-looking old gentleman came puffing up to the + desk of the Boler House, and, after registering, proceeded to question the + genial proprietor as to his identity. + </p> + <p> + "Dear me, dear me," he puffed, "and so you are the son of old John Boler, + the best hotel-keeper the sun ever shone upon! Why, I remember tossing you + up to the rafters under the porch of your father's house when you were + only the size of a baked apple and mighty nigh as measly looking. Well, + well, to be sure you had grit for a young one. Never got scared. Always + yelled for more. I believe if you had batted your soft little head against + the roof you'd have laughed all the louder and kicked until you did it + again," and the old man chuckled with the pleasure of age and + retrospection. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I remember well," said Mr. Boler, casting about in his own mind for + the form of revenge he should take on this man now that he was to have the + chance for which he had so longed and waited. + </p> + <p> + His first thought was to put him in the room next to the three sporting + men who played poker and told questionable stories of their own exploits + after two o'clock every night, but that hardly seemed adequate. The room + adjoining the elevator popped into his head. Every time the old gentleman + fell asleep <i>bang</i> would go that elevator door or <i>bzzzz</i> would + start off the bell so suddenly that it would leave him unnerved and + frantic in the morning. But what was that? What John Boler yearned for was + to make the punishment fit the crime, and, after all these years of + planning and wishing for the chance, here it was, and he felt that he + could think of nothing, absolutely nothing, bad enough. + </p> + <p> + So with a fine satire which was wholly lost upon his victim, Mr. Boler + ordered him taken to the very best room in the house, and made up his mind + that after disarming all suspicion in that way he would set about his + revenge, which should take some exquisitely torturous form. + </p> + <p> + All this had run through his mind with great rapidity while the old + gentleman talked. Then Mr. Boler turned the register around, wrote "98" + opposite the name. Said he should be delighted to show his own mettle to + one of his father's old guests, called out "Front," and transferred his + attention to a sweet-faced girl who stood waiting her turn to register. + </p> + <p> + "A small room, please," she said in a voice scarcely above a whisper. Mr. + Boler knew just what it meant in an instant. He knew that she was not used + to hotels—that she was uncertain what to do, and that she wanted her + living to cost her as little as possible. She was evidently a lady, and + quite as evidently from some small town. + </p> + <p> + "Front," he called again. "Show this lady to 96. Step lively." Front + grinned. Ninety-six was a mere closet with no window except one facing a + dark shaft. Indeed, it had once been the dressing-room and clothes press + for the adjoining suite, and so far as Front could remember had never been + used as a sleeping apartment by any one except the valet of a certain + French gentleman who once occupied 98. + </p> + <p> + "Took my revenge on the wrong person that time," mused Mr. Boler as he saw + the lady enter the elevator. "Now I wonder why I did that?" But Mr. John + Boler had his little superstition, as most of us have, and whenever he was + moved by a perfectly blind impulse to do a thing, he always believed that + "something would come of it sure," as he expressed it. "Never knew it to + fail. Of course I don't believe in such things; but—" and then he + would laugh and go on believing in it as implicitly as ever. + </p> + <p> + All day he brooded over what he should do to old Winkle, as he called the + man in 98, and as surely as his mind grew exhausted and his various plans + fell through, his thoughts would catch a glimpse of the timid girl in the + next room, and he would smilingly wink to himself and say, "Something will + come of it, something will come of it sure. Never put a guest in that + beastly room before, and I had nothing against <i>her. Must</i> have been + him It was after." He always called his blind impulses "It" when he was + utilizing them for superstitious purposes or to quiet his reason. + </p> + <p> + "I'll bet that girl being in that closet will be the means of getting me + even with old Winkle yet, and she is not used to city hotels. She'll think + that it is all right and she will most likely be out all day. It's not so + bad to sleep in after all. Quietest room in the house." + </p> + <p> + The next morning Mr. Winkle strolled into the office and harassed Mr. + Boler about his infancy, reminding him that he had possessed a very weak + stomach. "And who wouldn't," thought that gentleman indignantly, "if he + was pitched about like a bale of hay from morning till night by every fool + that got hold of him?" but he smiled pleasantly and said no doubt he had + been very much like other infants, judging from the way he grew up. He + looked upon a baby as the embryonic man, and as he was about an average + adult male biped now, he had most likely been very close to an average + male infant. "I might have been more," he hinted darkly, "but for certain + idiotic people," and then he laughed. For it was not in Mr. John Boler's + nature to be openly unpleasant to any one. This was the secret of his + success as an innkeeper. + </p> + <p> + "By the way, Johnnie," said old Mr. Winkle late the next afternoon, "I + thought I heard some one sobbing in the room next to mine last night. This + morning I concluded I was mistaken, but now I'm sure I heard it. Anybody + sick in there? I tried the door that leads into my room but it was locked. + It sounds like a woman's voice. It always did tear the very heart out of + me to hear a woman cry—" He went on talking but Mr. John Boler heard + no more. His heart gave a wild bound of delight. "It" had given him his + revenge. He would let the young woman stay in the hotel free of charge as + long as old Winkle was in the house if only she would weep and sob pretty + steadily. "'Johnnie,' by gad," thought he, resenting this new indignity to + his name. "By George, what luck!" And then he went about his duties with a + new spring in his always elastic step. At the lunch hour the following day + he glanced into the dining-room, and sure enough, there sat the occupant + of 96, and her eyes were swollen and red. At almost any other time this + would have disturbed John Boler, but now it was a deep delight to him. + </p> + <p> + "Had a spat with her lover, no doubt," speculated he, "and, by Jove! it + came at a lucky time for me. I'd pay her lover to keep up the row for + three weeks if I could get at him. 'Weak stomach,' 'Johnnie,' indeed!" And + he went back to the office rubbing his hands in a satisfied way, thinking + that old Winkle would be afraid to go to his room that night, and that his + sleep would be broken by visions of a weeping woman next door, even if she + did not keep him awake half the time sobbing because Ralph had called her + a mean thing or a proud stuck-up flirt, and hinted darkly that she was in + love with his rival. + </p> + <p> + Matters had gone on in this way for nearly a week and Mr. Winkle had + fretted and fumed and asked for another room two or three times, but Mr. + Boler told him that the house was full and that there wasn't another room + fit to offer him anyhow. He said that he would change the young lady's + room as soon as he could, but he expected her to leave every day. She went + out a good deal and wrote a large number of letters, and he felt sure she + was going to remain only a day or two longer. He apologized and explained + and planned, and then he would chuckle to himself the moment "old + Winkle's" back was turned to think how "<i>It</i>" had succeeded in + getting him even with the old reprobate without the least overt act on his + part. + </p> + <p> + But the eighth morning Mr. Winkle rebelled outright. He said that he would + wring the girl's worthless neck if he could get at her, but he could not + and would not bear her sobs any longer. The night before they had been + worse than ever and he had not slept a wink all night long. At last Mr. + Boler promised that he would transfer the girl to another room that very + afternoon if she did not leave, and the old man softened at once and said + if she could not afford to pay for any other room he would pay the + difference and she need never know it. + </p> + <p> + John Boler was not mercenary, but this offer gave him keen delight. For + "old Winkle" would have to buy his relief after all. He thought how + willingly a certain infant of his memory would have paid for rest and + quiet too when it was helpless clay in the hands of certain old imbeciles + he knew of. + </p> + <p> + At 2 p.m. he told Front to go up to 96 and tell the young lady that he now + had a better room for her that would cost her no more than the one she now + occupied, and to change her and her belongings to 342 forthwith. In five + minutes Front came back as white as a cloth and said that the young lady's + door was unlocked, that there were a number of letters on the table and + that she was dead. + </p> + <p> + Mr. John Boler dashed from behind the desk across the street and was back + in an incredibly short space of time, dragging behind him the dignified + and wealthy physician whose office faced the hotel. + </p> + <p> + At this stage of the proceedings he cautioned the employees not to say a + word about the matter on pain of instant dismissal. They one and all + promised, and then proceeded to tell the first reporter who dropped in + that a young lady had committed suicide upstairs and that she had cried + out loud for a week. They gave a full description of her and her effects, + all of which appeared in the 5 o'clock edition of the paper, duly + headlined with her name and certain gratuitous speculations in regard to + her motive for self-destruction. In these it was darkly hinted that she + was no better than she should be, but now that she was dead "we" (the + immaculate young gentlemen of the press) felt disposed to draw a veil of + charity over her past and say with the law that her suicide proved her + insanity, and that her mental condition might also account for her past + frailties. + </p> + <p> + While these generous young gentlemen were penning their reports the doctor + and Mr. John Boler worked over the poor helpless body of the unconscious + girl in the dark little room upstairs. Between times they read the letters + on the table and learned the old, old story—not of crime, but of + misfortune. No work had offered, and she must work or starve—or sell + the only value she possessed in the sight of men. One or two of the + answers to her advertisement had boldly hinted at this, and when her + little stock of money had run out and the little stock of misfortune had + swelled into a mountain, and the little pile of insults had increased + until she felt that she could endure life no longer, she had concluded to + brave another world where she was taught to believe a loving Father + awaited her because she had been good and true and pure to the last in + spite of storms and disappointments and temptations. So she made the wild + leap in the dark, confident that the hereafter could hold nothing worse, + and believing sincerely that it must hold something better for Her and her + kind, even if that better were only forgetfulness. + </p> + <p> + Up to this point her story was that of thousands of helpless girls who + face the unknown dangers of a great city with the confidence of youth, and + that ill training and ignorance of the world which is supposed to be a + part of the charm of young womanhood. She had not registered her real + name, it is true; but this was because she intended to advertise for work + and have the replies sent to the hotel, and somehow she thought that it + would be easier for her to do that over a name less sacred to her than her + mother's, which was also her own. So instead of registering as Fannie + Ellis Worth of Atlanta, she had written "Miss Kate Jarvis" and had given + no address whatever. This latter fact told strongly against her with the + reporters. They located her in a certain house on Thirty-first Street and + "interviewed" the madam, who gave them a picture of a girl who had once + been there, and a cut of this picture appeared in two of the morning + papers with the fuller account of the suicide. A beautiful moral was + appended to this history of the girl's life "which had now come to its + appropriate ending." But when one of these enterprising young gentlemen of + the press called to get the details of the funeral for his paper, he was + shocked to learn that the young lady was not dead after all, and that she + was now in a fair way to recover. He was still further disgusted when + neither Mr. Boler nor the attending physician would submit to an interview + and declined to allow him to send his card to the girl's room. + </p> + <p> + Then and there he made up his mind that if he had to rewrite that + two-column report to fit the new developments in the case, he would, as he + expressed it, make John Boler and pompous Dr. Ralston wish that they had + never been bom. Incident to this undertaking, he would darkly hint at a + number of things in regard to the girl herself and their relations with + her. This was not at all to make her wish that she had never been born; + but if it should serve that purpose, the young gentleman did not feel that + he would be in the least to blame—if, indeed, he gave the matter a + thought at all, which he very likely did not. + </p> + <p> + The article he wrote was certainly very "wide awake" and surprised even + himself in its ingenuity of conjecture as to the motive which could prompt + two such men as John Boler, proprietor of the Boler House, and Dr. + Ralston, "whose reputation had heretofore been above suspicion, to place + themselves in so unenviable, not to say dangerous, a position." He + suggested that although the young woman had taken her case out of the + jurisdiction of the coroner by not actually dying, this fact did not + relieve the affair of certain features which demanded the prompt attention + of the police court. The matter was perfectly clear. Here was a young + woman who had attempted to relieve herself, by rapid means, of the life + which all the social and financial conditions which surrounded her had + combined to take by a slower and more painful process. If she had + succeeded, the law held that she was of unsound mind—that she was, + in short, a lunatic—and treated her case accordingly; but, on the + other hand, if she failed, or if, as in this instance, her effort to place + herself beyond want and pain was thwarted by others, then the law was + equally sure that she was <i>not</i> a lunatic at all, but that she was a + criminal, and that it was the plain duty of the police judge to see that + she was put with those of her class—the enemies and outcasts of + society. + </p> + <p> + It was also quite clear that any one who aided, abetted, or shielded a + criminal was <i>particeps criminis,</i> and that unless Mr. John Boler and + Dr. Ralston turned the young offender over to the police at once, there + was a virtuous young reporter on the <i>Daily Screamer</i> who intended to + know the reason why. + </p> + <p> + It was this article in the <i>Screamer</i> which first made Mr. Winkle + aware of the condition of affairs in the room adjoining his own. He had + been absent from the hotel for some hours, and had, therefore, known + nothing of the sad happenings so near him. He dashed down into the office + with the paper in his hand and asked for Mr. Boler; but that gentleman was + not visible. It was said that he was in consultation with Dr. Ralston at + the office of the latter, whereupon Mr. Winkle re-read the entire article + aloud to the imperturbable clerk and expressed himself as under the + impression that something was the matter with the law, or else that a + certain reporter for the <i>Screamer</i> was the most dangerous lunatic at + present outside of the legislature. The clerk smiled. A young man leaning + against the desk made a note on a tablet, and then asked Mr. Winkle what + he knew of the case and to state his objections to the law, first saying + <i>which</i> law he so vigorously disapproved. The clerk winked at Mr. + Winkle, but Mr. Winkle either did not see, or else did not regard the + purport of the demonstration, and proceeded to express himself with a good + deal of emphasis in regard to a condition of affairs which made it + possible to elect as lawmakers men capable of framing such idiotic + measures and employing on newspapers others who upheld the enactment. But + before he had gone far in these strictures on public affairs as now + administered he espied John Boler and followed him hastily upstairs. + </p> + <p> + That afternoon Mr. Winkle almost fell from his chair when he saw the + evening edition of the <i>Screamer</i> with a three-column "interview" + with himself. It was headed, "<i>Rank Socialism at the Boler House. A + Close Friend of the Offending Landlord Lets the Cat out of the Bag. A + Dangerous Nest of Law Breakers. John Boler and Dr. Ralston still Defiant. + Backed by a Man Who Ought to Know Better. Shameless Confession of one of + the Arch Conspirators. The Mask torn from Old Silas Winkle Who Roomed Next + to the Would-be Suicide. Will the Police Act Now?</i>" + </p> + <p> + When Mr. Winkle read the article appended to these startling headlines, he + descended hastily to the office floor and proceeded to make some remarks + which it would be safe to assert would not be repeated by any + Sunday-school superintendent—in the presence of his class—in + the confines of the State of New York. John Boler was present at the time + and whispered aside to Mr. Winkle that a reporter for the <i>Screamer</i> + and five others from as many different papers were within hearing, + whereupon Mr. Winkle became more and more excited, and talked with great + volubility to each and every one of the young men as they gathered about + him. "<i>Adds Blasphemy to His Other Crimes</i>," wrote one of them as his + headline, and then John Boler interfered. + </p> + <p> + "Look here, boys," said he pleasantly, but with a ring of determination in + his voice, "you just let Mr. Winkle alone. This sort of thing is all new + to him, and he had no more to do with that girl than if his room had been + in Texas." (The reporters winked at each other and one of them wrote, <i>Connived + at by the Proprietor</i>.) "I put her in the room next to his. <i>I</i> + helped the doctor to resuscitate her. <i>I</i> positively refuse to give + you her real name and present address, although I know both, and Mr. + Winkle does not, and if the police court has any use for me it knows where + to find me. Have a cigar?" Each reporter took a weed, and three of them + went to the office of Dr. Ralston to complete their records as soon as + possible. + </p> + <p> + "I'm sorry all this has happened to you in my house, Mr. Winkle," said + John Boler, as they stood alone for a moment. "It is partly my fault, + too," he added, in a sudden burst of contrition. "It" had carried his + revenge further than he had intended. He knew how the old man's sudden + outbreak of righteous indignation would go against him in the newspaper + reports that would follow, and John Boler was kind-hearted as well as + fearless. + </p> + <p> + "Good Lord, don't you worry about me, Johnnie!" said the old man, craning + his neck to watch the retreating forms from the window. "But those young + devils have gone over to the doctor's office and they'll bully him into + telling where the girl is, and then they'll bully the police into dragging + her into court yet. Dear me, dear me!" + </p> + <p> + "Now, don't you be scared about that, Mr. Winkle. The doctor and I have + made up our minds to fight this thing out. We've found out all about the + girl and that it was simply a case of utter despair. It was a question of + death by slow or by quick means. Society, law, prescribed the slow method, + and the girl herself chose the rapid one. Well, now, as long as she was to + be the sufferer in either case, it strikes me that she had about as good a + right to a voice in the matter as the rest of us. Dr. Ralston and I + checkmated her. (I can't afford to have that kind of thing happen in the + hotel, of course.) But, by gad, we're not going to let them make a + criminal of her. All the circumstances combined to do that before and she + chose death. Well, we stopped her efforts in that line too, and now the + court proposes to put the finishing touches on society's other + inhumanities and send her up for it. Why, good God, man, just look at it! + In substance that girl said, 'I'll die before I'll be forced into + association with criminals,' and the court says, 'You shall do nothing of + the kind. Science shall doctor you up and we will <i>send</i> you up. + Despair is a crime.' That girl tried every way she knew of to live right. + She failed. No work that she could do came her way. Well, now, will you + just tell me what she was to do? You know what any man on God's earth + would do if <i>he</i> had been situated that way and <i>could</i> have + sold his virtue—in the sense we use virtue for women. Well, some + women are not built that way. They prefer to die. Life don't mean enough + of happiness to them to pay for the rest of it—life as it is, I + mean. Well, since women don't have anything to say about what the laws and + social conditions shall be, it strikes me that the situation is a trifle + arbitrary, to put it mildly. We make laws for and demands upon women that + no man on earth would think of complying with, and then we tell 'em they + sha'n't even die to get away from the conditions we impose and about which + they are not allowed a word to say. To tell you the bald truth <i>I'm</i> + ashamed of it. So when we learned that girl's story we just made up our + minds that since we had taken the liberty to keep her from getting out of + the world by a shorter cut than the one usually prescribed in such cases—starvation—that + we'd just take the additional liberty of keeping her from being hounded to + insanity and made a criminal of by legal verdict." + </p> + <p> + Mr. Winkle gave a snort that startled John Boler, for he had been running + on half to himself during the last of his talk and had almost forgotten + that the old man was present. When he heard the explosion he mistook its + meaning and his conscience gave him another smart twinge. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I'm sorry, <i>very</i> sorry, Mr. Winkle, that this trouble has come + to you in my house, but who could have foreseen that—a—that is + to say—" + </p> + <p> + "Trouble to <i>me?</i>" exclaimed Mr. Winkle. "Trouble to <i>me?</i> Who's + said anything about any trouble to me? Do you suppose I care what those + young scamps say about me in the papers? Got to make a living, haven't + they? Well, society doesn't object to their making a living by taking what + does not belong to 'em, if it happens to be a man's reputation or a + woman's chance to ever make an honest living again. Little thefts like + that don't count That is not a crime; but dear me, Johnnie, do you suppose + I care a tinker's dam about that, so for as <i>I</i> go? God bless my + soul, if the dear boys can sell their three columns of rot about me, and + it will keep them off the heels of some poor devil that it might ruin, + why, I'm satisfied. All I've got to say to you is, if they arrest you I'll + go bail, and if they fine you I'll pay it, and if they jail you—hang + it, Johnnie, I'll serve your term, that's all." + </p> + <p> + Mr. Boler laughed. "My punishment shall all be vicarious then, hey? Good + idea, only it won't work in every-day life. The law doesn't let other + people serve out your term. But I'm just as much obliged, and—and—to + tell you the truth, Mr. Winkle, I'm—that is to say, I hope you will + forgive me—the fact is, I forgive you freely for the part you took + in helping to addle such brains as I had when I was a child. There is my + hand. 'It' went a little too far this time, and—" + </p> + <p> + Mr. Winkle took off his glasses and polished them carefully. Then he + placed them astride his nose and gazed thoughtfully at his old friend's + son for fully a minute before he said a word. Finally he took the extended + hand, shook it solemnly, and walked slowly away, wondering to himself if + it could be possible that hard-headed old John Boler's son was touched a + little in the brain. Mr. Boler noticed his perplexed expression and + laughed merrily to himself as he started toward the elevator. Before he + reached it he turned and beckoned to Mr. Winkle to follow him. On the + third floor they were joined by Dr. Ralston. + </p> + <p> + "She is so much better now, Mr. Winkle," explained the genial hotel man, + "and you are an older man than either the doctor or I, so I thought— + It just struck me that she might feel— That you might like— + Oh, damn it, would you like to go up to see her? We are going now. A + clergyman has called, and if she wants to see him we shall not stay but a + minute; but as there is no woman about, as she is so alone, I thought + perhaps she might like to have an older man come with us, for she seems to + be a very sensitive girl. She has been silent about herself so far; but + she is better now, and we want to find out what work she can do, and have + a place ready for her when she is able to get about. Perhaps she will talk + more freely to you." + </p> + <p> + The old gentleman looked perplexed, but made no reply until they were out + of the elevator. Then he took Mr. Boler by the arm and said helplessly, "I—I + am a bachelor, you know, Johnnie, and—" + </p> + <p> + "No!" laughed Mr. Boler. "Well, confound it, you don't look it. Anybody + would take you for the proud father of a large brood. She will think you + are and it may help her. Come on." + </p> + <p> + The old gentleman entered the darkened room last and sat down silently in + the deepest shadow. The doctor stepped to the bed and spoke in a low tone. + A white face on the pillow turned slowly, so that the only band of light + that reached in from the open door fell full upon it. Mr. Winkle shuddered + as he saw for the first time the delicate, pallid, hopeless face. + </p> + <p> + "A priest?" she said feebly, in answer to the doctor. "Oh, no. Why should + I want to see a priest? You've had your way. You've brought me back to + battle with a world wherein I only now acknowledged my defeat." Her voice + trembled with weakness and emotion, but she was looking steadily at the + doctor with great wide eyes, in which there burnt the intensity of mental + suffering and a determination to free her mind even at the risk of losing + the good-will of those who had intended to be kind to her. "A priest! What + could he do? <i>This</i> life is what I fear. His mission is to deal with + other worlds—of which I know already what he does—and that is + <i>nothing</i>. Of this life I know, alas! too much. Far more than he. He + cannot help me, for I could tell him much he <i>cannot</i> know, of + suffering and fortitude and hope laid low at last, without a refuge even + in cloistered walls. I know what he would say. His voice would tremble and + he would offer sympathy and good advice—and, maybe, alms. These are + not what I want or need. I am not very old—just twenty-two—but + I have thought and thought until my brain is tired, and what good could it + do for him to sit beside me here and say in gentle tones that it is very + sad? No doubt that he would tell me, too, how wicked I have been that I + should choose to die by my own hand when life had failed me." + </p> + <p> + She smiled a little, and her wan face lit from within was beautiful still + in spite of its pallor. The doctor murmured something about natural + sympathy, and Mr. Boler remarked that men who were fortunate would gladly + help those who were in distress if only they knew in time. She did not + appear to heed them, but presently went on as though her mind were on the + clergymen below waiting to see her. + </p> + <p> + "To feel that it is sad is only human; but what is to be done? That is the + question now. What is to be done for suffering in <i>this</i> world? It is + life that is hard to bear, not death. Sympathy with the unfortunate is + good. Kind words and gentle tones as your priest recounts their woes are + touching. Yes, and when they are drawn to fit the truth would melt a heart + of stone; but unless action wings the sympathy and dries the tears, the + object of his tenderness is in no wise bettered—indeed, is injured. + Why? Because he lulls to sleep man's conscience and thereby gives relief + from pangs that otherwise had found an outlet through an open purse. And + when I say an open purse I do not speak of charity, that double blight + which kills the self-respect in its recipient and numbs the conscience of + the 'benevolent' man who grasps the utmost penny <i>here</i> that he may + give with ostentation <i>there</i>, wounding the many that he may heal the + few. All this was safe enough, no doubt, while Poverty was ignorant, for + ignorance is helpless always; but now—" There was a pause. She + raised her head a little from the pillow and a frightened look crept into + her eyes—"but now the poor are not so ignorant that it will long be + safe to play at cross purposes with suffering made too intelligent to + drink in patient faith the bitter draughts of life and wait the crown of + gold he promises hereafter—and wears, meanwhile, himself. A <i>little</i> + joy on earth, they think, will not bedim the lustre of a life that is to + come—if such there be. You see I've thought a little in these + wretched days and months just past." She was silent again for a moment. A + bitter smile crossed her face and vanished. The doctor offered her a + powder which she swallowed without a word. John Boler stepped to the table + and poured out a glass of wine, but when he held it toward her she shook + her head and closed her eyes a moment. Then she spoke again as if no break + had checked her thought. "Oh, no; I do not care to see your priest. The + poor no longer fail to note his willingness to risk the needle's eye with + camel's back piled high with worldly gain. If he may enter thus, why may + not they with simpler train and fewer trappings? The poor are asking this + to-day of prince and priest alike. No answer comes from either. Evasion + does not satisfy. I ask, but no one answers. The day once was when silence + passed for wisdom. That day is gone. To-day we are asking why? and why? + and why? no longer, when? And so the old reply, 'hereafter,' does not fit + the query. Why, not when, is what we urge to-day, and your replies must + change to fit the newer, nearer question. When I say <i>your</i> replies, + I do not mean you, doctor, nor your friend. You two meant kindly by me. + Yes, I know. I am not claiming that you are at fault, nor they—the + fortunate—the prince and priest. I understand. Blind nature took her + course and trod beneath her cruel feet the millions who were born too weak + to struggle with the foes they found within themselves and in their + stronger brothers. I know, I know." + </p> + <p> + She lay back on the pillow and closed her eyes wearily. Mr. Winkle drew + near and stood behind the doctor's chair, still keeping in the shadow, but + watching her pale face with an intensity born of a simple nature easy to + stir and quick to resolve. The doctor touched her pulse with a light + finger and gravely nodded his head as he glanced at his watch. Her heavy + eyelids did not lift but her voice broke the silence again. There was a + cadence in it that gave a solemn thrill to the three men as they listened, + the doctor watching with professional interest the effect of the powder he + had given; the other two waited, expecting they knew not what. + </p> + <p> + "The ignorance and cruelty of all the past, the superstitious fears, the + cunning prophecies, the greeds and needs of men, joined hands and marched + triumphant. They did not halt to ask the fallen what had borne them down. + They did not silence bugle blasts of joy where new-made graves were thick. + No silken flag was lowered to warm to life the shivering forms of comrades + overcome and fallen by the way. The strong marched on and called + themselves the brave. Sometimes they were. But other times the bravest had + gone down, plucked at, perchance, by wife or child or friend whose sorrow + or distress reached out and twined itself about the strong but tender + heart and held it back until the foot lost step, and in the end the eye + lost sight of those who only now had kept him company." + </p> + <p> + She lifted her small white hand and pointed as if to a distant + battlefield, but her eyes remained closed. The doctor glanced uneasily at + his watch and took her other wrist in his fingers again. + </p> + <p> + "The next battalion trampled him. The priest bent low and whispered 'over + there, hereafter,' and slipped the treasure of the fallen hero beneath his + ample robe to swell the coffers of the church, since dead men need no + treasures." + </p> + <p> + Her voice was infinitely sad but she laughed a little and opened her eyes. + They fixed themselves upon the silvered head of Mr. Winkle standing behind + the doctor's chair. + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps I shock you. I do not mean to, but I have thought and thought + these last few wretched months, and looking at the battlefields of life + backward through all the ages, I thought I saw at night, in camp, the + priest and conqueror meet beside the campfire and council for the next + day's march. I thought I heard the monarch say, 'I go before and cleave my + way. You follow me and gather up two things—the spoils I miss and + all the arrows of awakened scorn and wrath embedded in the breasts of + those of our own ranks who fall or are borne down, lest they arise and + overtake us while we sleep and venge themselves on us. Tell them to wait. + Their time will come. Tell them <i>I</i> clear the way for them, and <i>you</i> + forgive a hatred which you see is growing up within their wicked breasts. + Quiet, soothe, and shame them into peace. Assure them that <i>hereafter</i> + they, not we, shall have the better part. Gain time. Lay blame to me if + need be; but always counsel patience, waiting, acquiescence, peace, + submission to the will of God—<i>your will and mine</i>. Your task + is easy. No danger lies therein. I take the risk and share with you the + glory and the gain.' I heard the priest disclaim all greed of gain and go + to do his part as loyal subject and as holy man. I saw all this and more + before I took the last resolve you balked. You meant it kindly, doctor, + yes, I know, but I am very tired and what is there ahead for me, or such + as I, on battlefields like these?" + </p> + <p> + No one ventured a reply. She closed her eyes and waited. The doctor took + another powder from his case and held it above her lips. She smiled and + swallowed it. + </p> + <p> + "We take our powders very docilely," she said, with a bitter little laugh + as the wine-glass left her hand and Mr. Boler's finger touched her own. He + noticed that hers was very cold. + </p> + <p> + "They used to make us sleep in the good old days of priest and monarch, + but our nerves are wrong just now. Our powders only make us think the more + and have strange visions." + </p> + <p> + Dr. Ralston glanced at Mr. Boler and nodded his head mysteriously. The + powder was beginning to work, he thought, for she had reverted to the old + vision, and talked as if she were in a dream. "That way it was, another + way it is, and still another will be," she was saying. "To-day the honest + poor, the hampered weak, are defeated, dazed, and some of us are hopeless. + Others there are who cling to hope and life and brood on vengeance. That + is your danger, gentlemen, for days that are to come. You will have to + change your powders. The old prescriptions do not make us sleep. We think, + and think, and think. We strain our nerves and break our hearts, for what? + A life as cold and colorless and sad as death itself—to some of us + far sadder—and yet you will not even let us die. Again we ask you, + why? There is no place on earth for such as we, unless we will be + criminals. That is the hinge whereon the future turns. How many will + prefer the crime to want? What dangers lie behind the door that now is + swinging open? Intelligence has taught us scorn for such a grovelling lot, + has multiplied our needs, and turned the knife of suffering in quivering + wounds no longer deadened by the anaesthetics of ignorant content with + life or superstitious fear of death. The door is swinging on the hinge. + The future has to face creatures the past has made like demons. Some, like + myself, behind the door, who do not love mere life, will turn the + sharpened dagger on themselves. But there are others—" + </p> + <p> + Her voice sank. The three men thought that she had fallen asleep at last. + The doctor drew a long satisfied breath and consulted his watch for the + fourth time, making a mental note for future use in giving the drug whose + action he was watching. He started and frowned, therefore, when her voice + broke the silence again. + </p> + <p> + "Others there are, in spite of pain and anguish, in spite of woe and fear, + who cling to life—who read in eyes they worship the pangs of hunger, + cold, and mental agony. Where will their vengeance go? Who knows?" + </p> + <p> + She opened her great eyes and looked first at one and then at another, and + repeated, "Who knows?" + </p> + <p> + Again there was no reply. After a long pause Mr. Winkle said gently: + </p> + <p> + "There is a place in life for girls like you. I shall charge myself with + it. You shall find work and joy yet, my child. Now go to sleep. Be quiet. + We have let you talk too long. Stop thinking sadly now. You think too + much. You <i>think</i> too much." + </p> + <p> + She closed her eyes quickly and there was a tightening of the lips that + left them paler than before. Then a tear rolled slowly down her temple. + Before it reached the pillow the doctor bent forward and dried it softly + with his silk handkerchief. She opened her eyes wide at the touch. "'Be + quiet?'" she repeated, "'stop thinking?' Oh, yes; <i>I</i> will be quiet, + but the rest, the others? Those with whom you do not charge yourself, who + find no work, no joy? Will <i>they</i> be quiet, will they stop thinking? + Oh, yes; I can be quiet, very quiet, but the rest, the rest? The others + who think too much—<i>all, all?</i>" + </p> + <p> + There was a wild look in her dry eyes. The doctor touched her wrist again + and said softly to the men beside him, "It is working now. She will sleep. + But the shock of all her trouble has left her mind unhinged, poor child. + 'The rest? the others?' <i>We</i> cannot care for all the countless poor. + Her brain is surely touched, poor child, poor child. How can we tell + whether the others will stop thinking, or how, or when? Her mind was + wandering, and now she sleeps, poor child. Come out. She is best alone." + </p> + <p> + They closed the door gently behind them and stood a moment in awkward + silence outside, each one afraid to speak and yet ashamed of his own + tender helplessness. At last Mr. Winkle looking steadily in the crown of + his hat, said huskily, "By gad, boys, there is something rotten in the + state of Denmark." They all three laughed with an effort, but kept their + eyes averted. + </p> + <p> + "It is a rat in the wainscoting of the storeroom," said John Boler, with a + desperate attempt to regain his old manner and tone, "and I've got to go + and look after it or there'll be the devil to pay with the Boler House." + And he ran down the stairs three steps at a time heartily ashamed of his + own remark, but determined not to allow the tears to show themselves + either in his eyes or voice, and feeling that his only safety was in + flight. + </p> + <p> + But Mr. Winkle had not stood silently behind the doctor's chair all that + time for nothing, and if his nature was somewhat light, and if he had + taken life so far as something of a jest, he was by no means without a + heart. He did not now trouble himself very greatly about the tangled + problems of existence, but he felt quite equal to dealing with any given + case effectively and on short notice. With systems he was helpless, with + individuals he could deal promptly. Therefore he, in common with the + doctor and Mr. Boler, and, indeed, with most of us, occupied himself with + the girl he saw suffering and in need. + </p> + <p> + When she had cried out, "But the rest, the others, what of them?" he had + said nothing, because he had nothing to say. He was vaguely aware that + when the smallpox broke out on one of Dr. Ralston's patients that astute + practitioner did not essay to treat each individual pustule separately as + the whole of the disease and so devote his entire skill and mind to each + in turn until it was cured. But then he could not undertake to cure the + whole human race of its various social ailments any more than Dr. Ralston + could hope to look after all of its physical pains. So Mr. Winkle took + this one little social pustule upstairs as his particular charge, and in + his own peculiar way went about securing better conditions for her, + leaving the "others who think too much" to somebody else, or to fate, as + the case might be. Therefore, when Mr. Winkle reached the street door and + met an officer of the law who had come prepared to learn the whereabouts + of the would-be suicide or else take Mr. John Boler and Dr. Ralston into + custody, the old gentleman made up his mind to begin his part in the + future proceedings without further delay. + </p> + <p> + Unknown to Mr. Winkle himself, literature had lost a great novelist when + he had gone into the mercantile business, and the surprises which he now + sprang upon the policeman were no less astonishing and interesting to + himself than they were to that astute guardian of the public morals. + </p> + <p> + "Want to know where she is, do you? Well, don't worry Johnnie Boler any + more. They've already got him so his mind is a little affected. I'll tell + you all about that girl. Her name is Estelle Morris. She worked for me for + nine years as a nursery governess. Last month my youngest child died, and + it upset Estelle so that she has been out of her head ever since. I + thought if I'd bring her to the city maybe she might get over it, but she + didn't, and the doctor gave her some stuff and she took a double dose by + mistake, and all the row came from that and the long tongues of the + servants, pieced out by the long pencils of the reporters. See!" + </p> + <p> + "Is that so?" exclaimed the officer. "Where is she now?" + </p> + <p> + Mr. Winkle had not thought of that, and he did not know exactly what to + say; but he agreed to produce her in court on the following day if so + ordered, and there the matter dropped for the moment. + </p> + <p> + That evening there appeared in a paper this "want:" "A good-looking young + woman who is willing to lie like a pirate for the space of one hour for + the sum of $50. May have to go to court." The number of handsome girls who + were anxious to lend the activity of their tongues for the purpose named + and the amount stipulated was quite wonderful. One particularly bright + young miss remarked that she had been in training for just that position + for years. She was confidential correspondent for a broker. Mr. Winkle + accepted her on the spot. + </p> + <p> + "Now," said he, "look solemn and sad. That is right. You do it first rate. + Whatever I tell about you you are to stick to. Understand that?" + </p> + <p> + "Perfectly. Years of practice," she responded, with entire simplicity and + without a suspicion of humor. + </p> + <p> + "Your name is Estelle Morris, and you have been the governess of my + children for nine years. How old are you?" + </p> + <p> + "Nineteen," said Estelle Morris demurely. + </p> + <p> + "Good gracious, girl, what could you teach at ten years of age? You've got + to be older. Take the curl out of your hair in front and put on a bonnet + with strings. I heard my niece say that made her look ten years older. + Mind you, you are not a day under twenty-six. Not a day." + </p> + <p> + "All right," said Estelle Morris thoughtfully. + </p> + <p> + "You are to look sick, too, and—" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I can fix <i>that</i> easy enough. I'll—" + </p> + <p> + "Well, then fix it and come back here at exactly two o'clock this + afternoon." + </p> + <p> + At the appointed hour, Mr. Winkle met Miss Estelle Morris and took her + with great dignity and care to the Boler House, where he was joined by + another gentleman—an officer of the law—and the three started + out together. + </p> + <p> + "The examination was strictly private in deference to the wishes of the + parties first implicated, John Boler and Dr. Ralston, and because it is + now believed that the girl is more sinned against than sinning," wrote the + reporter for the morning rival of the <i>Screamer</i>. "It is the object + of justice to help the erring to start anew in life wherever that line of + action is consonant with the stern necessities of the blind goddess. + Neither of the male accomplices appeared in the case, but Mr. Silas Winkle—whose + name has figured somewhat conspicuously in the matter—produced the + principal, who, it must be confessed, is pretty enough to account for all + the chivalry which has been displayed in her behalf. She confessed to + twenty-six years of single wretchedness, although she could easily pass + for a year or two younger. It would appear that she had lived in Mr. + Winkle's family for nine years as governess to his children and came to + the city with him about two weeks ago. The justice accepted this + explanation of the relations existing between them, and that there was no + attempt at suicide at all, but only an accidental overdose of a remedy + prescribed by Dr. Ralston, which explained satisfactorily the doctor's + connection with the unsavory case, and places him once more in the + honorable position from which this unfortunate affair so nearly hurled + him. In short, the justice said in substance, 'not guilty, and don't do it + any more.' The young woman bowed modestly, and Silas Winkle led her from + the court-room a sadder, and, let us hope, a wiser woman. Such as she must + have much to live for. Many a man has braved death for a face less lovely + than hers. This ends the 'Boler House Mystery,' which, after all, turns + out to be only a tempest in a teapot, with a respectable father of a + family and his children's governess for <i>dramatis persono</i> and a + fresh young reporter on a certain sensational morning contemporary as + general misinformer of the public as usual." This was headlined, "<i>Exploded—Another + Fake by Our Esteemed Contemporary</i>." + </p> + <p> + That night John Boler rubbed his eyes when he read the report. "I thought + you were a bachelor, Mr. Winkle," said he, "and here you produce in court + a governess—" + </p> + <p> + "I am," said Mr. Winkle, laughing, and then he showed his "want" + advertisement. "That is the whole case, Johnnie, my boy, but it is all + over now. Don't you worry; it might go to your head again. You saved the + girl and I saved you, and it only cost me $50. I'd pay that any time to + get ahead of the <i>Screamer</i>, and I rather think I salted that + enterprising sheet down this time, don't you? But what is to become of + that girl?" added he, without waiting for a reply to his first question. + "You've taken the liberty to save her life, which she had decided she did + not want under existing circumstances. Has she simply got to go over the + same thing again? I told her that I'd look after her, but I don't see how + in thunder I'm going to do it. She won't take money from me and <i>I've</i> + got nothing for her to do. Is there nothing ahead of her but a coffin or a + police court?" + </p> + <p> + "For this individual girl, yes. Dr. Ralston has already secured work for + her; but for all the thou-sands of her kind—" John Boler's voice + trembled a little and he stopped speaking to hide it. He in common with + most men was heartily ashamed of his better nature. + </p> + <p> + "For all the thousands of her kind," broke in Mr. Winkle, "there are just + exactly three roads open—starvation, suicide, or shame, with the + courts, the legislature, and the newspapers on the side of the latter. I + just tell you, Johnnie, it makes my blood boil. I—I don't see any + way out of it—none at all. That is the worst of it." + </p> + <p> + "I do," said Mr. Boler. + </p> + <p> + "<i>You do!</i>" exclaimed Mr. Winkle excitedly, and then looked hard at + his old friend's son to see if he had gone crazy again. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I do. Those same newspapers you are so down on will do it. They're + bound to. The boys go wrong sometimes, as they did in this case; but that + only makes sensible people indignant, and, after all, it called attention + to the law that makes such things possible. <i>More light on the laws</i>. + That's the first thing we want, and no matter which side of a question the + papers take, we are bound to get that in the long run. Silence is the + worst danger. We get pretty mad at the boys if they write what we don't + like, but that isn't half so dangerous as if they didn't write at all. + See?" + </p> + <p> + Mr. Winkle turned slowly away and shook his head as he murmured to + himself: "Who would have believed that old John Boler would have been the + father of a lunatic? Dear me, dear me. I'm going back to Meadville before + I get touched in the head myself." And he started to his room to pack his + valise. John Boler followed him to the elevator. + </p> + <p> + "I don't blame you for feeling pretty mad about all the stuff they put in + the <i>Screamer</i> about you; but—oh, the boys <i>mean</i> all + right—" + </p> + <p> + "So does the devil," broke in the old man. But Mr. Boler gave no evidence + of noticing the interruption nor of observing the irascibility of his + guest. + </p> + <p> + "The trouble is with the system," he went on, entering the elevator after + Mr. Winkle. "Why, just look at it, man. What I say or do, if it is of a + public nature, I'm responsible for <i>to</i> the public. What you write + you put your name to; but it's a pretty big temptation to a young fellow + who knows he has got the swing in a newspaper and doesn't have to sign his + name to what he says, to make an effort to 'scoop' his rivals at whatever + cost. The boys don't mean any harm, but irresponsible power is a mighty + dangerous weapon to handle. Not many older men can be trusted to use it + wisely. Then why should we expect it of those young fellows who don't know + yet any of the deeper meanings of life? Great Scott, man! <i>I</i> think + they do pretty well under the circumstances. I'm afraid I'd do worse." + </p> + <p> + Mr. Winkle stroked his chin reflectively. + </p> + <p> + "No doubt, no doubt," he said abstractedly, as they stepped out of the + elevator. + </p> + <p> + John Boler looked at him for a brief space of time to see if he had + intended the thrust and then went on: + </p> + <p> + "That girl's life or death just meant an item to the boys, and it didn't + mean much more to you or me until—until we stood and heard her talk + and saw her suffer, and were made personally uncomfortable by it. Yet we + are old enough to know all about it for her and others. We <i>do</i> know + it, and go right along as if we didn't. We are a pretty bad lot, don't you + think so?" + </p> + <p> + Silas Winkle unlocked his door before he spoke. Then he turned to his old + friend's son and shook his hand warmly. + </p> + <p> + "Good-bye," he said, looking at him steadily. "Good-bye, Johnnie. I see it + only comes on you at odd spells. Come up to Meadville for a while and I + think you will get over it altogether. Your father was the clearest-headed + man I ever saw and you seem to have lucid intervals. Those last remarks of + yours were worthy of your father, my boy," and the old man patted him + softly on the back. + </p> + <p> + John Boler whistled all the way downstairs. Then he laughed. + </p> + <p> + "I wonder if old Winkle really does think I am off my base," said he, as + he took down his hat. "I suppose we are all more or less crazy. He thinks + I am and I know he is. It is a crazy world. Only lunatics could plan or + conduct it on its present lines." And he laughed again and then sighed and + passed out into the human stream on Broadway. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0016" id="link2H_4_0016"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + THE TIME LOCK OF OUR ANCESTORS. + </h2> + <p> + <i>"Visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third + and fourth generation.</i>"—Bible. + </p> +<div style="height: 1em;"> + <br /> + </div> + <p> + "Don't be so hard on yourself, Nellie. I am sure it can be no great wrong + you have done. Girls like you are too apt to be morbid. No doubt we all do + it, whatever it is. I'm sure I shall not blame you when you tell me. + Perhaps I shall say you are quite right—that is, if there is any + right and wrong to it, and provided I know which is which, after I hear + the whole story—as most likely I shall not. Right—" + </p> + <p> + And here the elder woman smiled a little satirically, and looked out of + the window with a far-away gaze, as if she were retravelling through vast + spaces of time and experience far beyond anything her friend could + comprehend. + </p> + <p> + The evening shadows had gathered, and cast, as they will, a spell of + gravity and exchange of confidences over the two. + </p> + <p> + Presently the older woman began speaking again: + </p> + <p> + "Do you know, Nell, I was always a little surprised that Lord Byron, of + all people, should have put it that way: + </p> +<pre xml:space="preserve"> + "I know the right, and I approve it too; + Condemn the wrong—and yet the wrong pursue. +</pre> + <p> + "<i>The</i> right '—why, it is like a woman to say that. As if there + were but one 'right,' and it were dressed in purple and fine linen, and + seated on a throne in sight of the assembled multitude! '<i>The right.</i>' + indeed! Yes, it sounds like a woman—and a very young woman at that, + Nellie." + </p> + <p> + The girl looked with large, troubled, passionate eyes at her friend, and + then broke out into hot, indignant words—words that would have + offended many a woman; but Florence Campbell only laughed, a light, queer + little peal; tipped her chair a trifle farther back, put her daintily + slippered feet on the satin cushion of the low window-seat, and looked at + her friend, through the gathering darkness, from under half-closed + eyelids. + </p> + <p> + Presently—this woman was always deliberate in her conversation; long + silences were a part of her power in interesting and keeping the full + attention of her listeners—presently she said: + </p> + <p> + "Of course you think so. Why shouldn't you? So did I—once. And do + you know, Nellie, that sort of sentiment dies hard—<i>very</i> hard—in + a woman. At your age—" Florence Campbell always spoke as if she were + very old, although to look at her one would say that she was not + twenty-eight. + </p> + <p> + These delicately formed Dresden-china women often carry their age with + such an easy grace—it sits upon them so lightly—in spite of + ill-health, mental storms, and moral defeats, that while their more robust + sisters grow haggard and worn, and hard of feature and tone, under weights + less terrible and with feelings less intense, they keep their grace and + gentleness of tone in the teeth of every blast. + </p> + <p> + "At your age, dear, I would have scorned a woman who talked as I do now; + and more than that, I would have suspected her, as you do not suspect me, + of being a very dangerous and not unlikely a very bad person indeed—simply + from choice. While you—you generous little soul—think that I + am better than I talk." + </p> + <p> + She laughed again, and shifted her position as if she were not wholly + comfortable under the troubled gaze of the great eyes she knew were + fastened upon her. + </p> + <p> + "You think I am better than my opinions. I know exactly what you tell + yourself about me when you are having it out with yourself upstairs. Oh, I + know! You excuse me for saying this on the theory that it was not + deliberate—was an oversight. You account for that by the belief that + I am not well—my nerves are shaken. You are perfectly certain that + <i>I</i> am all right, no matter what I do, or say, or think." She took + her little friend's soft hand as it twisted nervously a ribbon in her lap, + and held the back of it against her cheek, as she often did. "But just + suppose it were some one else—some other woman, Nellie, you would + suspect her (no doubt quite unfairly) of all the crimes in the + statute-books. Oh, I know, I know, child! I did—at your age—and, + sad to relate, <i>I</i> had no Florence Campbell to soften my judgments on + even one of my sex." + </p> + <p> + She had grown serious as she talked, and her voice almost trembled. The + instant she recognized this herself, she laughed again, and said gayly: + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I was a very severe judge—once—I do assure you, though + you may not think so now." She dropped her voice to a tone of mocking + solemnity, not uncommon with her, and added: "If you won't tell on me, + I'll make a little confession to you, dear;" and she took both of the + girl's hands firmly in her own and waited until the promise was given. + </p> + <p> + "I wouldn't have it get out for the world, but the fact is, Nell, I + sometimes strongly suspect that, at your age, I was—a most + unmitigated, self-righteous little prig." + </p> + <p> + Nellie's hands gave a disappointed little jerk: but her friend held them + firmly, laughed gayly at her discomfiture—for she recognized fully + that the girl was attuned to tragedy—buried her face in them! for an + instant, and then deliberately kissed in turn each pink little palm—not + omitting her own. Then she dropped those of her friend, and leaned back + against her cushions and sighed. + </p> + <p> + Nellie was puzzled and annoyed. She was on the verge of tears. + </p> + <p> + "Florence, darling," she said presently, "if I did not know you to be the + best woman in the world, I shouldn't know what to make of your dark hints, + and of—and of you. You are always a riddle to me—a beautiful + riddle, with a good answer, if only I could guess it. You talk like a + fiend, sometimes, and you act like—an angel, always." + </p> + <p> + "Give me up. You can't guess me. Fact is, I haven't got any answer," + laughed Florence. + </p> + <p> + But the girl went steadily on without seeming to hear her: "Do you know, + there are times when I wonder if it would be possible to be insane and + vicious, mentally and <i>verbally</i>, as it were, and perfectly sane and + exaltedly good morally." + </p> + <p> + Florence Campbell threw herself back on her cushions and laughed gayly, + albeit a trifle hysterically. "Photograph taken by an experienced artist!" + she exclaimed. "You've hit me! Oh, you've hit me, Nell." Then sitting + suddenly bolt-upright, she looked the girl searchingly in the face, and + said slowly: "Do you know, Nellie, that I am sometimes tempted to tell the + truth? About myself, I mean—and to <i>you</i>. Never on any other + subject, nor to anybody else, of course," she added dryly, in comedy + tones, strangely contrasting with the almost tragic accents as she went + on. "But I can't. '<i>The</i> truth!' Why, it is like <i>the</i> right; + I'm sure I don't know what it is; and it has been so long—oh, so + cruelly long—since I told it, by word or action, that I have lost + its very likeness from my mind. I have told lies and acted lies so long—" + Her friend's eyes grew indignant and she began to protest, but Florence + ran on: "I have evaded facts—not only to others, but to myself, + until—until I'd have to swear out a search-warrant and have it + served on my mental belongings to find out myself what I <i>do</i> think + or feel or want on any given subject." + </p> + <p> + It was characteristic of the woman to use this flippant method of + expression, even in her most intense moments. + </p> + <p> + "I change so, Nell; sometimes suddenly—all in a flash." + </p> + <p> + There was a long silence. Then she began again, quite seriously: + </p> + <p> + "There is a theory, you know, that we inherit traits and conditions from + our remote ancestors as well as from our immediate ones. I sometimes fancy + that they descend to some people with a Time Lock attachment. A child is + born"—she held out her hands as if a baby lay on them—"he is + like his mother, we will say, gentle, sweet, kind, truthful, for years—let + us say seven. Suddenly the Time Lock turns, and the traits of his father + (modified, of course, by the acquired habits of seven years) show + themselves strongly—take possession, in fact. Another seven years, + and the priggishness of a great-uncle, the stinginess of an aunt, or the + dullness, in books, of a rural grandfather. Then, in keeping with the next + two turns of the Lock, he falls in love with every new face he sees, + marries early and indulges himself recklessly in a large family. He is an + exemplary husband and father, as men go, an ideal business man, and a + general favorite in society." + </p> + <p> + She was running on now as if her words had the whip-hand of her. + </p> + <p> + "Everybody remarks upon the favorable change since his stupid, priggish + college days. All this time, through every change, he has been honorable + and upright in his dealings with his fellows. Suddenly the Time Lock of a + Thievish Ancestor is turned on; he finds temptation too strong for even + that greatly under-estimated power—the force of habit of a lifetime—and + the trust funds in his keeping disappear with him to Canada. Everybody is + surprised, shocked, pained—and he, no doubt, more so than any one + else. Emotional insanity is offered as a possible explanation by the + charitable; longheaded, calculating, intentional rascality, by the severe + or self-righteous. And he? Well, he is wholly unable to account for it at + all. He <i>knows</i> that he had not lived all these years as a conscious, + self-controlled thief. He <i>knows</i> that the temptations of his past + life had never before taken that particular form. He <i>knows</i> that the + impulse was sudden, blinding, overwhelming; but he does not know why and + how. It was like an awful dream. He seemed to be powerless to overcome it. + The Time Lock had turned without his knowledge, and in spite of himself. + The unknown, unheard-of Thievish Ancestor took possession, as it were, + through force of superior strength and ability—and then it was his + hour. The hereditary shadow on the dial had come around to him. The + great-uncle's hour was past. <i>He</i>, no doubt, was 'turned on' to some + other dazed automaton—in Maine or Texas—who had fallen heir to + a drop too much of his blood, and she, poor thing, if it happened to be a + girl this time, forthwith proceeded to fall in love with her friend's + husband—seeing he was the only man at hand at the time; while the + Thievish Ancestor left—in shame and contrition—a small but + light-fingered boy in Georgia, to keep his engagement with our + respectable, highly honored, and heretofore highly honorable man of + affairs in Wall street. The Time Lock of heredity had been set for this + hour, and the machinery of circumstances oiled the wheels and silently + moved the dial." There was absolute silence when Florence Camp-bell's + voice ceased. The heavy curtains made the shadows in the struggling + moonlight deep and solemn. Two great eyes looked out into the darkness and + a shudder passed over her frame. She thought her little friend had fallen + asleep, she lay so still and quiet on the rug at her feet. Florence + sighed, and thought how quickly youth forgot its troubles and how lightly + Care sat on her throne. Then suddenly a passionate sobbing broke the + silence, and two arms, covered with lace and jewels, flung themselves + around the older woman's knees. + </p> + <p> + "O my God! Florence; O my God! is there no way to stop the wheels? Must + they go blindly on? Can we <i>never</i> know who or what we shall be + to-morrow? It is awful, Florence, awful; and—it—is <i>true!</i> + O God! it is <i>true!</i>" + </p> + <p> + Florence Campbell had been very serious when she stopped her little + harangue. There had been a quality in her voice which, while it was not + wholly new to her friend, <i>would</i> have been unknown to many who + thought they knew her well. To them she was a beautiful, fashionable, + rather light woman, with a gay nature, who either did not know, or did not + care to investigate too closely, the career of her husband, to whom she + was devotedly attached. + </p> + <p> + She had been quite serious, I say, when she stopped her little + philosophical speculation; but she was greatly surprised at the storm she + had raised in the breast of her little friend. + </p> + <p> + Florence bent down quickly, and putting her arms about the girl tried to + raise her up; but she only sobbed the harder, and clung to her friend's + knees as a desperate, frightened creature might cling to its only refuge. + </p> + <p> + "Why, Nellie, little kitten," said the older woman, using a term of + endearment common with her in talking with the girl—"why, Nellie, + little kitten, what in the world is the matter? Did I scare the life out + of you with my Time Locks and my gruesome ancestors?" and she tried to + laugh a little; but the sound of her voice was not altogether pleasant to + the ear. "I'll ring for a light. I had no business to talk such stuff to + you when you were blue and in the dark too. I guess, Nell, that the Time + Lock of <i>my</i> remote ancestor, who was a fool, must have been turned + on me shortly after sundown to-day, don't you think?" And this time her + laugh lacked the note of bitterness it had held before. + </p> + <p> + She ran on, still caressing the weeping girl at her feet: + </p> + <p> + "Yes, undoubtedly, my Remote Ancestor—the fool—has now moved + in. Do you think you can stand seven years of him, kitten, if you live + with me that long? But you won't. You'll go and marry some horrid man, and + I shall be so jealous that my hair will curl at sight of him." + </p> + <p> + But the girl would not laugh. She refused to be cheered, nor would she + have a light. She raised herself until her head rested on her friend's + bosom, and clung to her, sobbing as if her heart would break. Florence + stroked her hair and sat silent for a while, wondering just what had so + shaken the child. She knew full well that it was <i>not</i> what she had + hinted of the darkness and her gruesome story. Presently Nellie drew her + friend's face down, and whispered between her sobs: + </p> + <p> + "Darling, I must have had some dreadful ancestor, a wicked—<i>wicked</i> + woman. I—" + </p> + <p> + Florence Campbell shrieked with laughter. She felt relieved of—she + did not know what. She had blamed herself for even unconsciously touching + the secret spring of sorrow in the girl's heart. It was a strange sight, + the two women clinging to each other, the one sobbing, the other laughing, + each trying in vain to check the other. + </p> + <p> + At last Nellie said, still almost in a whisper: "But, Florence, you do not + know. You do not understand. You are too good to know. It is you who will + scorn and hate me when I tell you. O Florence, Florence, I can never <i>dare</i> + to tell you!" Her friend, still laughing, made little ejaculations of + satirical import as the girl grew more and more hysterical. + </p> + <p> + "O thou wicked wretch!" laughed she. "No doubt you've killed your man, as + they say out West. Oh, dear—oh, dear! Nell, this is really quite + delicious! Did it step on a bug? Or was it a great big spider? And does it + think it ought to be hanged for the crime? A peal of laughter from the + one, a shudder from the other, was the only reply to these efforts to + break the force of the girl's self-reproach. Florence clinched her small + fist in mock heroics and began again: + </p> + <p> + "Your crimes have found you out! And mine—<i>mine</i>—has been + the avenging hand! Really, this is too good, kitten. I shall tell, let me + see—I shall tell—<i>Tom!</i>" + </p> + <p> + The girl was on her feet in a flash. + </p> + <p> + "Not that! <i>not that</i>, Florence! Anything but that! I will tell you + myself first—<i>he</i> shall not?" Florence grew suddenly silent and + grave. The girl slipped down at her knees again, and clasping her hand, + went hoarsely on: + </p> + <p> + "O Florence, darling, I did not mean to wrong you! Truly, truly, I did not—and + I do not believe <i>he</i> did—not at—first. We—oh, it + was—" she sank on the floor, at the feet of her astonished friend, + and with upstretched arms in the darkness whispered: "Florence, Florence—O + my God! I <i>cannot</i> tell you! I must go away! <i>I must go away!</i>" + The older woman did not touch the outstretched hands and they sank to the + floor, and on them rested a tear-stained, wretched face. + </p> + <p> + A moment later Tom Campbell entered the room. To eyes unaccustomed to the + darkness nothing was visible. He did not see his wife, who arose as he + entered, and stood with bated breath over the form of the girl on the + floor. + </p> + <p> + "By Jove!" he muttered, "this room is as dark as Egypt, and then some—Wonder + where Florence is. Those damned servants ought to be shot! Whole house + like a confounded coal-pit! Didn't expect me for hours yet, I suppose! + That's no reason for living like a lot of damned bats! 'Fraid of + musquitoes, I suppose. Where are those matches? <i>Florence!</i> She's + evidently gone out—or to bed. Wonder where her little 'kitten' is? + Umm—wonder how much longer Florence means to keep her here? Don't + see how the thing's going to go on much longer this way, with a girl with + a conscience like that. Perfectly abnormal! Perfectly ridiculous! Umm—no + more tact than—" + </p> + <p> + Nellie moaned aloud. Florence had held her breath, hoping he would go. He + had almost reached the door leading to the hall, after his vain search for + matches. + </p> + <p> + "Hello! what was that?" said Campbell, turning again into the room. + </p> + <p> + His wife knew that escape was not now possible. "Nothing, Tom," she said, + in a voice that trembled a little. "Go upstairs. I will come up soon." + </p> + <p> + "Why, hello, Florence, that you? What are you sitting here in the dark + for, all alone? Why didn't you speak to me when I came in? What did you + let me—" + </p> + <p> + Nellie sat up, and in doing so overturned a chair. + </p> + <p> + Tom's eyes had grown accustomed to the darkness. He saw the two women + outlined before him, and he saw that Nellie had been on the floor, and + that his wife stood over her. + </p> + <p> + "What's the matter?" he demanded. "What's up?" + </p> + <p> + He came toward them. Nellie sprang to her feet, with flashing eyes and + outstretched, imploring hands to wave him back. She was about to rush into + a painful explanation. Florence stepped toward her, put both arms about + her, and drew her onto the cushioned window-seat at their side. She knew + she must cover the girl's agitation from her husband, and somehow gain + time to think. + </p> + <p> + "Sit down, dear," she said softly. "Sit down here by me. You have been + asleep. He frightened you coming in so suddenly. You have been dreaming; + you talked in your sleep—but it was all nonsense—about an + ancestor, whom you blamed very bitterly." + </p> + <p> + The girl began to speak impulsively, but Florence checked her. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I know. You told me. It was all the greatest stuff. But the part + that was true—I doubt if she was to blame. I think, from all I know + of—of her, and of the gentleman you mentioned, the one she—seemed + to care for—that—oh, no, kitten! I am <i>sure she</i> was not + to blame." + </p> + <p> + Nellie was trembling violently, clinging to her friend in shame and + remorse. Tom stood perfectly quiet in the deeper darkness, back from the + window, with a smile on his cheerful face and a puzzled light in his + handsome eyes. + </p> + <p> + "Go upstairs, Tom," said Florence again, this time in a steadier tone. + "Nellie's head aches; you waked her up too suddenly. We don't want more + light—do we, Nellie? Not just now. We have quite light enough for + the present. I assure you we are better off just now in the dark. You + would think so yourself if you could see us as we see ourselves. We are + quite battered and out at elbow, I assure you, and not at all fit for + fastidious masculine eyes." + </p> + <p> + She was pulling herself up well. "To-morrow we will spruce up our bangs, + put on fresh gowns, and not know ourselves for the wretches we are + tonight. Until then, Sir Knight, no masculine eye shall rest upon our + dilapidation. Go!" + </p> + <p> + Tom Campbell had seen his wife in this mood before. He went. + </p> + <p> + All the way upstairs he wondered what had happened. "Never could make + women out anyway," he muttered; "least of all, Florence. Women are a queer + lot. More you live with 'em, more you don't know what they'll do next. + Wonder what in thunder's up. 'Kitten' never said a word; but I'm damned if + I did't hear her groan! Guess the little goose feels kind of—queer—with + me and the old lady both present. Wonder—whew!—wonder how much + I said aloud, and how much they heard when I first went in! Confounded + habit, talking aloud to myself! Got to stop it, old boy; must be done—get + you into trouble yet!" + </p> + <p> + Then he turned off the gas, and was sleeping as peacefully as an infant + before the two women below stairs had parted for the night. + </p> + <p> + When Tom left the room, Nellie began to sob again, and Florence stroked + her hair with her icy hands and waited for the girl to speak—or grow + calm. And for herself—she hardly knew what she waited for in + herself; but she felt that she needed time. + </p> + <p> + After a long silence she said, quite gently; "Nellie, little girl, we will + go upstairs now; you will go to bed. If you ever feel like it, after you + take time to think it over, and your nerves are quiet—if you ever + feel like it, you may tell just what trick your troublesome ancestor has + tried to play you; but I want to say now, dear, don't feel that you <i>must</i> + tell me, nor that I do not know perfectly well that my little kitten is + all right, ancestors or no ancestors, and that we, together can somehow + find the combination to that Time Lock that so distresses you, and turn it + off again. Meantime, little girl <i>no one</i> shall harm you. You shall + be let alone; you are all right! Be <i>sure</i> of that. I am. Now, + good-night;" and she kissed the still sobbing girl on the forehead and + hands, in spite, of her protests and self-accusations. + </p> + <p> + Suddenly Nellie sank on her knees again, and grasped Florence's dress as + she had turned to go: + </p> + <p> + "O Florence! O Florence! are you human? How <i>can</i> you? You are not + like other women! O my God! if I could only be like you; but you frighten + me! You are so calm. How cold your hands are! oh—" + </p> + <p> + "Are they? I did not notice. Oh well, no matter; it is an old trick of + theirs, you know." + </p> + <p> + Florence Campbell's voice was very steady now. Her words were slow and + deliberate—they sounded as if she was very tired; and her step, as + she climbed the stairs, had lost its spring and lightness. + </p> + <p> + The next morning Nellie's breakfast was carried to her room, with a + message from Florence not to get up until she came to her at their usual + hour for reading together. + </p> + <p> + About noon, as the girl lay thinking for the hundredth time that she must + get up and face life again—that she must somehow stop this blinding + headache, and go away—that she must die—Florence swept into + the room, trailing her soft, long gown behind her, and gently closed the + door. She had put on a gay pink tea-gown, with masses of white lace and + smart little bows in unexpected places. + </p> + <p> + "Feel better, dear?" she asked, gayly. "Griggs told me your head ached, + and that you had not slept well. I confess I did not either—not + very. Tom and I talked rather late; you know he sails for Liverpool at + noon. Sure enough, you didn't know. Well, no matter. The vessel is just + about sailing now. Yes, it is <i>rather</i> sudden. We talked so much of + it last night that it seems quite an old story to me to-day, though. You + know he was to go in two weeks, anyway. It seemed best to go earlier, so I + helped him pack, and saw him to the steamer two hours ago. You know a man + doesn't have to take anything but a tooth-brush and a smoking-cap. We + thought it would be best for his health to go at once. Tom has not seemed + quite himself of late." She did not look at her friend as she talked and + her white face was turned from the light. She talked so fast, it seemed as + if she had rehearsed and was repeating a part with a desire to have it + over as soon as might be. "His Travelling Ancestor, the one who wants + change—change—change in all things, has had hold of him of + late. I'm sure you have noticed how restless he was." + </p> + <p> + The girl sat up and listened with wide eyes and flushed cheeks. She had + known many unexpected and unexplained things to be done in the house of + this friend, who had given her a home and a warm welcome a year before, + when she had left school, an orphan and homeless. But this sudden + departure she had not heard even mentioned before. She thought she + understood it. + </p> + <p> + "O Florence! Florence!" she cried, passionately. "It is <i>my</i> fault! I + have separated you! I have brought sorrow to you! You, who are so good, <i>so + good;</i> and I—oh, how <i>can</i> you be so kind to me? <i>Hate</i> + me! <i>Hate me!</i> Thrust me from your house, and tell the world I tried + to steal your husband! Tell that I am vile and wicked! Tell—and now + I have sent him away from you, who love him—whom he loves! Why do + you not blame me? Why do you never blame anyone? Why—" + </p> + <p> + There was a pause; the girl sobbed bitterly, while the older woman seemed + afraid to trust her voice. After a while in a tired, solemn tone, Nellie + went on: + </p> + <p> + "Do you think you can believe a word I say, Florence? Is there any use for + me to tell you the truth?" + </p> + <p> + Her friend nodded slowly, looking her steadily in the eyes. Her lips were + tightly drawn together, and her hands were cold and trembling. + </p> + <p> + "Then, Florence, I will tell you, truly—truly—truly, as I hope + for—" She was going to say "your forgiveness," but it seemed too + cruel to ask for that just now. "I did not understand, not at first, + either him or myself. I thought he was like you"—she felt Florence + shudder—"and loved me, as he said, as you did. I was so glad and + proud, until—until—O Florence! how can I tell you that I let + him <i>beg</i> me to go away with him! After I understood what he meant, + my heart <i>did</i> leap, even in its utter self-abasement and + wretchedness. I let him beg me twice, and kiss me, <i>after</i> I + understood! It must have been my fault; he said it was"—Florence + took her friend's hand in hers—"and he said that no one else had + ever taken his thoughts away from you." + </p> + <p> + The girl thought she saw the drawn lips before her curl; but she must free + her whole heart now, and lay bare her very soul. + </p> + <p> + "He said that he had always been true to you, Florence, even in thought, + until I—O Florence! I must be worse than anyone one earth. I—he + said—" + </p> + <p> + Florence Campbell sprang to her feet. "Yes, I know, I know!" she + exclaimed, breathlessly, "and you <i>believed</i> him! Poor little fool! + Women do. Sometimes a second time, but not a third time, dear—not a + third time! Do not blame yourself any more." She stopped, then hurried on + as one will do when danger threatens from within. "If it had not been you, + it would, it might—my God! it might have been worse! Some poor girl—" + </p> + <p> + She stopped again as if choking. The two women looked at each other; the + younger one gave a long, shuddering moan, and buried her face in her + hands. + </p> + <p> + Presently Florence said slowly: "All ancestors were not thieves. Some were + simply fickle, and light, and faithless." + </p> + <p> + Nellie raised a face full of passionate suffering: "Florence! Florence! + how can you excuse either of us? How <i>can—</i>" + </p> + <p> + Suddenly, with a great sob, Florence Campbell threw herself into the + girl's outstretched arms, and with a wail of utter desolation cried: + "Hush, Nellie, hush! Never speak of it again, never! Only <i>love</i> me, + <i>love me—love me!</i> I need it so! And <i>no</i> one—no one + in all the world has ever loved me truly!" It was the only time Nellie + ever saw Florence Campbell lose her self-control. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0017" id="link2H_4_0017"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + FLORENCE CAMPBELL'S FATE. + </h2> + <p> + <i>"'Tis the good reader that makes the good book; a good head cannot read + amiss; in every book he finds passages which seem confidences or asides + hidden from all else and unmistakably meant for his ear....</i>" + </p> + <p> + <i>"Every man has a history worth knowing, if he could tell it, or if we + could draw it from him."</i>—Ralph Waldo Emerson. + </p> + <p> + I was sitting in my office, with my head in my hands, and with both elbows + resting on my desk. I was tired in every nerve of my body; more than that, + I was greatly puzzled over the strange conduct of my predecessor in the + college, whose assistant I had been, and whose place I was appointed to + fill during the unexpired term for which he had been elected lecturer on + anatomy. + </p> + <p> + That morning he was to introduce me to the class formally as his + successor, deliver his last lecture, and then retire from active + connection with anatomical instruction. + </p> + <p> + Everything appeared to be perfectly arranged, and, indeed, some of the + younger men—under my direction—had taken special pains to + provide our outgoing and much admired professor with rather unusual + facilities for a brilliant close to his career as our instructor. + </p> + <p> + I was feeling particularly pleased with the arrangements, when, after a + neat little speech on his part, commendatory of me, and when we supposed + him to be about to begin his lecture, he suddenly turned to me and said, + bluntly: "You will be so good as to take the class to-day. Young + gentlemen, I bid you good morning," and abruptly took up his hat and left. + I sat facing an expectant and surprised class of shrewd young fellows, and + I was quite unprepared to proceed. + </p> + <p> + I had intended my first lecture to be a great success. It was ready for + the following day; but my notes were at home, and my position can, + therefore, be better imagined than described. + </p> + <p> + I was thinking over this and the strange behavior of my generally + punctilious predecessor, when he entered my office, unannounced, and, + after the ordinary salutations and apologies for having placed me in so + undesirable a position in the morning, he told me the following episode + from his history. I will give it in his own words, omitting, as far as + possible, all comment made by me at the time, thus endeavoring to leave + you alone with him and his story, as I was that night. This will better + enable me to impart the effect to you as it was conveyed to me at the + time. It greatly interested me then, but the more I think it over, the + less am I able to decide, in my own mind, all of the psychological + questions which it aroused then and which it has since called up. This is + the story. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0018" id="link2H_4_0018"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + I. + </h2> + <p> + I am, as you know, not a young man, and in the practice of my profession, + which has extended over a period of nearly thirty years, I have learned to + diagnose the cases that come under my care very slowly and by degrees. + Every year has taught me, what you will undoubtedly learn—for I have + great hopes for your future career—that physical symptoms are often + the results of mental ailments, and that, while cordials and powders are + sometimes very useful aids, the first and all-important thing is to + understand fully the <i>true</i> history of my patient. + </p> + <p> + I have laid stress upon the word true, simply because while <i>a</i> + history is easy enough to get, about the most difficult matter in this + world to secure is <i>the</i> history of one who comes to a physician + ailing in body or in mind. It is easy enough to treat a broken leg, a + gunshot wound, or even that ghastliest of physical foes, diphtheria, if it + is one of these and nothing more. + </p> + <p> + But if it is a broken leg as to outward sign, and a broken heart as an + inward fact, then the case is quite another matter, and the treatment + involves skill of a different kind. + </p> + <p> + If the bullet that tore its way through the body was poisoned with the + bitterness of disappointment, anxiety, terror, or remorse, something more + is needed than bandages and beef-tea. + </p> + <p> + If diphtheria was contracted solely from a defective sewage-pipe, it will, + no doubt, yield to remedies and pure air. But if long years of nervous and + mental prostration have made ready its reception, the work to be done is + of a much more serious nature. + </p> + <p> + So when I was first called to see Florence Campbell, the message conveyed + to me threw no light on the case, beyond what the most ordinary observer + would have detected at a glance. + </p> + <p> + The note read thus: + </p> + <p> + "Dr. H. Hamilton. + </p> + <p> + "Dear Sir: Although I have been in your city for several months, it is the + first time since I came that I have myself felt that I needed medical + attention. I have, therefore, not sent you the enclosed note (the history + of which you no doubt know) until now. If you will read it, it will + explain that the time has now come when, if you will come to me, I need + your care. + </p> + <p> + "Yours respectfully, + </p> + <p> + "Florence Campbell." + </p> + <p> + "Parlor 13, F——— Ave. Hotel." + </p> + <p> + The note enclosed was from a physician in Chicago whom I had known + intimately many years before, but with whom, contrary to the hint given by + the lady, I had held no communication for a long time past. It said: + </p> + <p> + "My Dear Doctor: One of my patients is about to visit your city. The + length of her stay is uncertain, and, as she is often ailing, she has + asked me to give her a note to one whom I believe to be skilful and to + possess the qualities which she requires in a physician. In thinking over + the list of those known to me in New York, I have decided to give her this + note to you. I need not commend her to you; she will do that for herself. + You will see at a glance that she is a charming woman, and you will learn + in five minutes' conversation with her, that she is a brilliant one. She + is also one of those rare patients to whom you can afford to tell the + unvarnished truth—an old hobby of yours, I remember—and from + whom you can expect it. She has had no serious illness recently, but is + rather subject to slight colds and sick headache. I give her sulph. 12. + She always responds to that in time. + </p> + <p> + "Yours, as ever, + </p> + <p> + "Thomas C. Griswold." + </p> + <p> + I folded the note and laid it on my desk and took up a pen. Then, on + second thought, I turned to the messenger and said, "Say to Miss Campbell + that I will call at four o'clock this afternoon." + </p> + <p> + Before I had finished the sentence he was gone, and I laid down the pen + and sat thinking. + </p> + <p> + How like Tom Griswold that was—the old Tom of college days—to + write such a note as that and give it to a patient! "Sulph. 12"—and + then I laughed outright at his interpretation of my desire for veracious + relations between patient and practitioner, and re-read his note from end + to end. + </p> + <p> + Then I read hers again. Neither of them indicated the slightest need of + haste on my part. + </p> + <p> + I pictured a pretty little blonde—I knew Tom's taste. He had been + betrothed to three different girls during the old days, and they had all + been of that type; small, blue-eyed, Dresden-china sort of girls, who had + each pouted—and married someone else in due time, after a + "misunderstanding" with Tom. + </p> + <p> + One of these misunderstandings had been over some roses, I remember. They + did not "match" her dress in color, and she was wretched. She told him he + should have known better than to get that shade, when he knew very well + that she never wore anything that would "go with" it. + </p> + <p> + He had naturally felt a little hurt, since he had bought the finest and + highest-priced roses to be had, and expected ecstatic praise of his taste + and extravagance. The "misunderstanding" was final, and, after a wretched + evening and several days of tragic grief, five tinted notes of sorrow, + reproach, and pride, they each began to flirt with some one else and to + talk of the inconstancy of the other sex. They vowed, of course, that they + would never marry anybody on earth, and finally engaged themselves to + marry some one else, who perhaps, had just passed through a similar + harrowing experience and was yearning to be consoled. + </p> + <p> + I remember that Tom smoked a great deal during this tragic period, that he + looked gloomy, wore only black neckties, and allowed a cold to run on + until it became thoroughly settled and had to be nursed all the rest of + the winter. + </p> + <p> + He knew that smoking injured him, and he doubtless had an idea that he + would end his misery by means of this cold, supplemented by nicotine + poison. How near he might have approached to success it would be difficult + to tell, if he had not met my sister Nellie at Christmas-time, and, after + having told his woes to her, promised her, "as a friend," not to smoke + again for three days and then to report to her. The report was + satisfactory, and she then confessed that she had forsworn bonbons for the + same length of time, as a sort of companionship in sacrifice. + </p> + <p> + This, of course, impressed Tom as a truly remarkable test of friendship + and sympathy, and,—well, what is the use to tell the rest? + </p> + <p> + You will know it. It had no new features, so far as I can now recall, and + I believe that they had been betrothed six months before Nellie met grave + old Professor Menlo and began the study of Greek roots and mythology. + </p> + <p> + I think that, perhaps, Tom would have been all right if it had not been + for the mythology. But Nellie was romantic, and the professor was an + enthusiast in this branch of knowledge, and so, by and by, Tom, poor + devil, took to smoking again—this time it was a pipe—and local + papers were filled with notices of the romantic marriage of "Wisdom and + Beauty," and poor little Nellie wrote a pathetic note to Tom, and sent it + by me, with frantic directions not to allow him to kill himself because + she had not understood her own heart; but that she loved him truly—as + a friend—still, and he must come to see her and <i>her</i> professor + in their new home on the hill. And, dear, dear, what a time I had with + Tom! It is funny enough now; but even I felt sorry for him then, and + shielded him from the least unnecessary pain by telling the boys that they + absolutely must not congratulate me on my sister's marriage, nor mention + it in any way whatever, when Tom was present, unless they wanted to have + trouble with me personally. + </p> + <p> + And to think that Tom married Kittie Johnson before he had fairly finished + his first year in the hospital service; and had to take her home for his + father to support! Since then I had seen him from time to time, and heard + of his large practice, his numerous children, and his elegant home; but he + never talked of his wife, although I believed him to be perfectly + satisfied with her. He seemed content, was prosperous beyond expectation, + and had grown fat and gouty, when I last saw him at a medical convention. + He attributed his too great flesh and his gout to the climate of his + Western home, and was constantly threatening to retire from practice, and + said that he should ultimately come to New York to live. + </p> + <p> + Yes, undoubtedly Florence Campbell is a petite blonde, with little white + teeth and a roseleaf cheek, thought I, and I laughed, and rang for my + carriage. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0019" id="link2H_4_0019"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + II. + </h2> + <p> + I do not know that I ever entered a more delicately perfumed room—and + I am very sensitive to perfumes—than the one in which Florence + Campbell sat. + </p> + <p> + She arose from her deep arm-chair as I entered, and, extending her hand, + grasped mine with a vigor unusual in a woman, even when she is well. + </p> + <p> + "This is Dr. Hamilton?" she said, in a clear voice, which told nothing of + pain, and was wholly free from the usually querulous note struck by women + who are ill, or who think that they are. "This is Dr. Hamilton? I am very + glad to see you, doctor. I am Florence Campbell. You received a note from + your friend, Dr. Griswold, of Chicago, and one telling how I came to send + it to you—how I came into possession of it." Direct of speech, clear + of voice, hand feverish, but firm in grasp, I commented mentally, as she + spoke. + </p> + <p> + This is not what I had expected. This is not the limp little blonde that I + had pictured, on a lounge, in tears, with the light fluffy hair in + disorder, and a tone of voice which plead for sympathy. This is not the + figure I had expected to see. + </p> + <p> + She stood with her back to the light, very erect and well poised. + </p> + <p> + "Come to the window," I said. "Does your head ache?" That is always a safe + question to ask, you know. + </p> + <p> + She laughed. "Oh, I don't know that it does—not particularly. I + fancy there is not enough inside of it to ache much. Mere bone and vacuity + could not do a great deal in that line, could it, doctor?" Then she + laughed again. She looked me in the eyes, and I fancied she was diagnosing + <i>me</i>. + </p> + <p> + Her eyes were deep, large, and brown, or a dark gray; her complexion was + dark and clear—almost too transparent; her cheeks were flushed a + little; and the light in her eyes was unnaturally intense. + </p> + <p> + She was evidently trying to gain time—to take my measure. + </p> + <p> + "It is always a rather trying thing to get a new doctor; don't you think + so?" she asked, with another little laugh. "I always feel so foolish to + think I have called him to come for so trifling a matter as my ailments + are. I am never really ill, you know," she said with nervous haste; "but I + am not very strong, and so I often feel—rather—under the + weather, and I always fancy that a doctor can prevent, or cure it; but I + suppose he cannot. I shall really not expect a great deal of you, in that + line, doctor. I cannot expect you to furnish me with robust ancestors, can + I? Just so you keep me out of bed"—and here, for the first time, I + noticed a slight tremor in her voice—"just keep me so that I can + read, and—so that I shall not need to sit alone, and—think—I + shall be quite satisfied—quite." She had turned her face away, as + she said the last; but I saw that she was having a hard struggle to keep + back the tears, notwithstanding the little laugh that followed. + </p> + <p> + I had felt her pulse; it was hardly perceptible, and fluttered rather than + beat; and I had watched her closely as she spoke; but whenever she came + near the verge of showing deeper than the surface she broke in with that + non-committal little laugh, or turned her face, or half closed her great + eyes, and I was foiled. Her pulse and the faint blue veins told me one + story; she tried to tell me quite another. + </p> + <p> + "How are you suffering to-day," I asked. + </p> + <p> + She looked steadily at me a moment, then lowered her eyes, raised her left + hand (upon which I remember noticing there was a handsome ring), looked at + its palm a moment, held her lips tightly closed, and then, with a sudden + glance at me, again as if on the defensive said: + </p> + <p> + "I hardly know; I am only a little under the weather; I am weak. I am + losing my—grip—on myself; I am—losing my grip—on + my—nerves. I cannot afford to do that." The last was said with more + emotion than she cared to display. So she arose, walked swiftly to the + dressing-case, took up a lace handkerchief, glanced at herself in the + mirror, moved a picture (I noticed that it was a likeness of an old + gentleman, perhaps her father), and returned to a chair which stood in the + shadow, and then, with a merry little peal of laughter, said: "Well, I + don't wonder, doctor, that you are unable to diagnose that case. It would + require a barometer to do that I fancy, from the amount of weather I got + into it. But really, now, how am <i>I</i> to know what is the matter with + me? That is for you to say; I am not the doctor. If you tell me it is + malaria, as all of you do, I shall be perfectly satisfied—and take + your powders with the docility of an infant in arms. I suppose it <i>is</i> + malaria, don't you?" + </p> + <p> + I wanted to gain time—to study her a little. I saw that she was, or + had been really ill; ill, that is, in mind if not in body. I fancied that + she had succeeded in deceiving Griswold into treating her for some + physical trouble which she did not have, or, if she had it, only as a + result of a much graver malady. + </p> + <p> + The right branch may have been found and nipped off from time time when it + grew uncomfortably long, but the root, I believed, had not been touched, + and, I thought, had not been even suspected by her former physician. + </p> + <p> + We of the profession, as you very well know, do not always possess that + abiding faith in the knowledge and skill of our brethren that we demand + and expect from outsiders. + </p> + <p> + We claim our right to guess over after our associates, and not always to + guess the same thing. + </p> + <p> + I believed that Griswold had not fully understood his former patient. + "Sulph. 12," indeed! Then I smiled, and said aloud: + </p> + <p> + "Dr. Griswold writes me that in such cases as yours he advises sulph. 12—that + it has given relief. Do you call yourself a sulphur patient?" I watched + her narrowly, and if she did not smile in a satirical way, I was deceived. + "Are you out of that remedy? and do you want more of it?" I asked with a + serious face. + </p> + <p> + She did not reply at once. There seemed to be a struggle in her mind as to + how much she would let me know. Then she looked at me attentively for a + moment, with a puzzled expression, I thought; an unutterably weary look + crossed her face. She said, slowly, deliberately: "I have no doubt sulphur + will do as well as anything else. Oh! yes—I am decidedly a sulphur + patient, no doubt I suppose I have taken several pints of that innocent + remedy in my time. A number of physicians have given it to me from time to + time. Your friend is not its only devotee. Sulphur and nux—nux and + sulphur! I believe they cure anything short of a broken heart, or actual + imbecility, do they not, doctor?" She laughed, not altogether pleasantly. + </p> + <p> + How far would she go and how far would she let me go, with this + humbuggery? I looked gravely into her eyes, and said, "Certainly they will + do all that, and more. They sometimes hold a patient until a doctor can + decide which of those two interesting complaints is the particular one to + be treated. In <i>your</i> case I am inclined to suspect—the—that + it is—<i>not</i> imbecility. I shall therefore begin by asking you + to be good enough to tell me what it is that affects your heart." + </p> + <p> + I had taken her wrist in my hand, as I began to speak. My finger was on + her pulse. It gave a great bound, and then beat rapidly; and although her + face grew a shade paler and her eyes wavered as they tried to look into + mine, I knew that I had both surprised and impressed her. + </p> + <p> + She recovered herself instantly, and made up her mind to hedge still + further. "If there is anything the matter with my heart, you are the first + to suspect it. My father, however, died of heart disease, and I have—always—hoped + that I should—die as suddenly. But I shall not! I shall not! I am so—wiry—so + all-enduring. I recover! I always recover!" + </p> + <p> + She said this passionately, and as if it were a grave misfortune—as + if she were very old. I pretended to take it humorously. + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps at your advanced age your father might have said the same." + </p> + <p> + She laughed. She saw a loophole, and immediately took it. "Oh, you think I + am very young, doctor, but I am not. People always think me younger than I + am—at first. I look older when you get used to me. I am nearly + thirty." + </p> + <p> + I was surprised; I had taken her to be about twenty-three. + </p> + <p> + "In years or in experience?" I said. "Which way do you count your age?" + </p> + <p> + She got up suddenly again and walked to the dressing-case, then to the + window. In doing so she raised her hand to her eyes. It was the hand with + the lace handkerchief in it. + </p> + <p> + "Experience!" she exclaimed; and then, checking herself. "No, people never + think me so old—not at first," she said, returning to her chair. + "But I suppose I am not too old to be cured with sulph. 12, am I?" Then + she laughed her little nervous, quick laugh, and added: "Dear old Dr. + Griswold, what faith he must have in 'sulph. 12.' and in his patients. He + seems to think that they were made for each other, as it were; and—of + course, I am not a doctor—how do I know they were not?" + </p> + <p> + "Miss Campbell," I said, stepping quickly to her side and surprising her, + "you do not need sulphur. You need to be relieved of this strain on your + nerves. Make up your mind to tell me your history to-morrow morning—to + tell it all; I do not want some fairy-tale. Until then, take these drops + to quiet your nerves." + </p> + <p> + There were tears in her eyes. She did not attempt to hide them. They ran + down her cheeks, and she simply closed the lids and let them flow. I took + her lace handkerchief and wiped her cheeks. Then I dropped it in her lap, + placed the phial on her stand, took up my hat, and left. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0020" id="link2H_4_0020"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + III. + </h2> + <h3> + But I did not get her story the next day, nor the next, nor the next. + </h3> + <p> + Her tact was perfectly mystifying in its intricacy; her power of evasion + marvellous, and her study of me amusing. She grew weaker and more languid + every day; but insisted that she had no pain—"nothing upon which to + hang a symptom," she would say. + </p> + <p> + I suggested that refuge of all puzzled doctors—a change. + </p> + <p> + "A change!" she said, wearily. "A change! Let me see, I have been here + nearly five months. I stayed two months in the last place. I was nine days + in San Francisco, one year doing the whole of Europe, and seven months in + Asia. Yes, decidedly, I must need a change. There are three places left + for me to try, which one do you advise?" There was a bitter little laugh, + but her expression was sweet, and her eyes twinkled as she glanced at me. + </p> + <p> + "I am glad I have three places to choose from," I said. "I was afraid you + were not going to leave so many as that, and had already begun to plan + 'electric treatment' as a final refuge." + </p> + <p> + She laughed nervously, but I thought I saw signs of a mental change. + </p> + <p> + I had always found that I could do most with her by falling into her own + moods of humor or merry satire upon her own condition or upon the various + stages of medical ignorance and pretence into which we are often driven. + </p> + <p> + "Where are these three unhappy places that you have so shamelessly + neglected? Was it done in malice? I sincerely hope, for their sakes, that + it was not so bad as that—that it was a mere oversight on your + part," I went on. + </p> + <p> + "Australia has been spared my presence so far through malice; the other + two, through defective theology. I dislike the idea of one of them on + account of the climate, and of the other, because of the stupid company," + she said, with a droll assumption of perplexity; "so, you see, I can't + even hope for a pleasant change after death. Oh, my case is quite + hopeless, I assure you, doctor; <i>quite!</i>" She laughed again. + </p> + <p> + I had her where I wanted her now. I thought by a little adroitness I might + get, at least, a part of the truth. + </p> + <p> + "So you are really afraid to die, and yet think that you must," I said, + bluntly. + </p> + <p> + She turned her great luminous eyes on me, and her lip curled slightly, + with real scorn, before she forced upon her face her usual mask of + good-hum-ored sarcasm. + </p> + <p> + "Afraid!" she exclaimed, "afraid to die! afraid of what, pray? I cannot + imagine being afraid to die. It is <i>life</i> I am afraid of. If I could + only—" This last passionately. She checked herself abruptly, and + with an evident effort resumed her usual light air and tone. "But it does + always seem so absurdly impossible to me, doctor, to hear grownup people + talk about being afraid to die. It almost surprised me into talking + seriously, a reprehensive habit I never allow myself. A luxury few can + afford, you know. It skirts too closely the banks of Tragedy. One is safer + on the high seas of Frivolity—don't you think?" + </p> + <p> + "Much safer, no doubt, my child," said I, taking her hand, which was + almost as cold and white as marble; "much safer from those deceived and + confiding persons who prescribe 'sulph. 12' for the broken heart and + overwrought nerves of a little woman who tries bravely to fly her gay + colors in the face of defeat and to whistle a tune at a grave." + </p> + <p> + I had called late, and we were sitting in the twilight, but I saw tears + fall on her lap, and she did not withdraw her hand, which trembled + violently. + </p> + <p> + I had touched the wound roughly—as I had determined to do—but, + old man as I was, and used to the sight of suffering as I had been for + years, I could restrain myself only by an effort from taking her in my + arms and asking her to forget what I had said. She seemed so utterly + shaken. We sat for some moment in perfect silence, except for her quick, + smothered little sobs, and then she said, passionately: + </p> + <p> + "Oh, my God! doctor, how did you know?" And then, with a flash of fear in + her voice, "Who told you? No one has talked me over to you? No one has + written to you?" + </p> + <p> + "I know nothing, except what I have seen of your brave fight, my child. + All the information I have had about you, from outside, was contained in + that valuable little note of introduction from Griswold." + </p> + <p> + In spite of her tears and agitation she smiled, but looked puzzled, as I + afterward recalled she always did when I mentioned his name, or spoke as + if she knew him well. + </p> + <p> + "I have not watched you for nothing. And I never treat a patient without + first diagnosing his case. I do not say that I am <i>always</i> right. I + am not vain of the methods nor of the progress of my profession; but I am, + at least, not blind, and I have always been interested in you. I should + like to help you, if you will let me. I can do nothing for you in the + dark." Then dropping my voice, significantly: "Does <i>he</i> know where + you are? Does <i>he</i> know you are ill?" + </p> + <p> + There was a long silence. I did not know but that she was offended. She + was struggling for command of her voice, and for courage. Presently she + said, in a hoarse whisper, which evidently shocked her as much as it + startled me, so unnatural did it sound: + </p> + <p> + "Who? My husband?" + </p> + <p> + "Your <i>husband!</i>" I exclaimed. "Are you—is there—I did + not know you were married. Why did you always allow me to call you <i>Miss</i> + Campbell?" + </p> + <p> + "I do not know," she said, wearily. "It made no difference to me, and it + seemed to please your fancy to treat me as a child.. But I never really + noticed that you did always call me Miss. If I had, I should not have + cared. What difference could it make to me—or to you—what + prefix you put to my name?" + </p> + <p> + "But I did not know you were married," I said almost sharply. + </p> + <p> + She looked up, startled for a moment; but recovering, as from some vague + suspicion, in an instant she said, smiling a little, and with evident + relief, plunging into a new opening: + </p> + <p> + "That had nothing to do with my case. There was no need to discuss family + relations. I never thought of whether <i>you</i> were married or not. You + were my doctor—I your patient. What our family relations, wardrobes, + or political affiliations might be seem to me quite aside from that. We + may choose to talk of them together, or we may not, as the case may be. + And in my case, it would not be—edifying." There was a moment's + pause, then she said, rather impatiently, but as if the new topic were a + relief to her: "The idea that a woman must be ticketed as married or + unmarried, to every chance acquaintance, is repellent to me. Men are not + so ticketed—and that is right. It is vulgar to suppose a sign is + needed to prevent trespass, or to tempt approach. 'Miss Jones, this is Mr. + Smith.' What does it tell?" She was talking very rapidly now—nervously. + "It tells her, 'Here is a gentleman to whom I wish to introduce you. If + you find him agreeable you will doubtless learn more of him later on.' It + tells him, 'Here is a lady. <i>She is not married.</i> Her family + relations—her most private affairs—are thrust in his face + before she has even said good evening to him. I think it is vulgar, and it + is certainly an unnecessary personality. What his or her marital relations + may be would seem to come a good deal later in the stage of acquaintance, + don't you think so, doctor?" She laughed, but it was not like herself. + Even the laugh had changed. She was fighting for time. + </p> + <p> + "It is a new idea to me," I said, "and I confess I like it. Come to think + of it, it <i>is</i> a trifle premature—this thrusting a title + intended to indicate private relations onto a name used on all public + occasions. By Jove! it is absurd. I never thought of it before; but it is + <i>never</i> done with men, is it? 'General,' 'Mr.' 'Dr.'—none of + them. All relate to him as an individual, leaving vast fields of + possibilities all about him. 'Mrs.' 'Miss'—they tell one thing, and + one only. That is of a private nature—a personal association. You + have started me on a new line of thought, and," said I, taking her hand + again, "you have given me so much that is new to think of to-night that I + will go home to look over the budget. You are tired out. Go to bed now. + Order your tea brought up. Here is an order to see to anything you may + ask, promptly. Beesley, the manager, is an old friend of mine. Any order + you may give, if you send it down with this note from me, will be obeyed + at once. I shall come to-morrow. Good-night." + </p> + <p> + I put the order on the table, at her side. I know my voice was husky. It + startled me, as I heard it. She sat perfectly still, but she laid her + other hand on top of mine, with a light pressure, and her voice sounded + tired and full of tears. + </p> + <p> + "Good-night. You are very kind—very thoughtful. I will be brave + to-morrow. Good-night." That night I drove past and saw a light in her + window at one o'clock. "Poor child!" I said; "will she be brave enough to + tell me to-morrow, or will she die with her burden, and her gay little + laugh on her lips?" + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0021" id="link2H_4_0021"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + IV. + </h2> + <p> + The next day I called earlier than usual. I had spent an almost sleepless + night, wondering what I could do for this beautiful, lovable woman, who + seemed to be all alone in the world, and who evidently felt that she must + remain apart and desolate. + </p> + <p> + What had caused her to leave her husband? Or had he left her? What for? + What kind of a man was he? Did she love him, and was she breaking her + heart for him? or did he stand between her and some other love? Had she + married young, and made a mistake that was eating her life out? Whose + fault was it? How could I help her? + </p> + <p> + All these and a thousand other questions forced themselves upon me, and + none of the answers came to fit the case. Answers there were in plenty, + but they were not for these questions nor for this woman—not for + this delicate flower of her race. + </p> + <p> + As I stepped into the hotel office to send my card to "Parlor 13," as was + my custom, the clerk looked up with his perfunctory smile and said, "Go' + morning, doctor. Got so in the habit 'coming here lately, s'pose it'll + take quite a while to taper off. That about the size of it?" + </p> + <p> + I stared at the young man in utter bewilderment. + </p> + <p> + "Ha! ha! ha! I believe you'd really forgot already she'd gone;" and then, + with a quick flash of surprise and intelligent, detective shrewdness, "You + knew she was going, doctor? She did not skip her little bill, did she? Of + course not. Her husband was in such a deuce of a hurry to catch the early + train, the night-clerk said he was ringing his bell the blessed night for + fear they'd get left. Front! take water to 273. You hadn't been gone five + minutes last night, when he came skipping down here with your check and + order, and we just had to make things hum to get cash enough together to + meet it for her; but we made it, and so they got off all right." + </p> + <p> + "Have you got my check here yet?" asked I, in in a tone that arrested the + attention of the other clerk, who looked up in surprise. + </p> + <p> + "Good heavens! no. Do you think we're made of ready money, just because + you are? That check was in the bank and part of the cash in that desk the + first thing after banking hours," said he, opening out the register and + reaching for a bunch of pens behind him. "You see it cleaned us out last + night. I couldn't change two dollars for a man this morning. I told + Campbell last night that you must think hotels were run queer, to expect + us to cash a five-thousand dollar check on five minutes' notice. Couldn't + 'a' done it at all if 't hadn't been pay-night for servants and the rest + of us. We all had to wait till to-day. But the old man'll tell you. Here + he comes." + </p> + <p> + "Why, hello! doctor, old boy," said Beesley, coming up from behind and + clapping me vigorously on the shoulder. "Didn't expect to see the light of + your countenance around here again so soon. Thought we owed it all to your + professional ardor for that charming patient of yours up in 13. They got + off all right, but if any other man but you had sent that order and check + down here for us to cash last night I'd have told him to make tracks. Of + course, I understood that they were called away suddenly—unexpectedly, + and all that. He told me all about it, and that you did not finish the + trade till the last minute; but—" + </p> + <p> + "<i>Trade?</i>" gasped I, in spite of my determination to hear all before + disclosing anything. "Trade?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, come off. Don't be so consumedly skittish about the use of English, I + suppose you want me to say that the 'transaction between you was not + concluded,' etc., etc. Oh, you're a droll one, doctor." He appeared to + notice a change on my face, which he evidently misconstrued, and he added, + gayly. "Oh, it was all right, my boy, as long as it was you—glad to + do you a good turn any day; but what a queer idea for that little woman to + marry such a man! How did it happen? I'd like to know the history! Every + time I saw him come swelling around I made up mind to ask you about them, + and then I always forgot it when I saw you. When he told me you had been + his wife's guardian I thought some of kicking you the next good chance I + got, for allowing the match, and for not telling me you had such a pretty + ward. You always were a deep rascal—go off!" He rattled on. + </p> + <p> + Several times I had decided to speak, but as often restrained myself. My + blank face and unsettled manner appeared to touch his sense of humor. He + concluded that it was good acting. I decided to confirm the mistake, until + I had time to think it all over. Finally, I said, as carelessly as I + could: + </p> + <p> + "How long had this—a—husband been here? That is—when did + he get back?" + </p> + <p> + "Been here! get back! Been here all the time; smoked more good cigars and + surrounded more wine than any other one man in the house. Oh, he was a + Jim-dandy of a fellow for a hotel!" Then, with sudden suspicion: "Why? Had + he told you he'd go away before? Oh! I—see! <i>That</i> was the + trade? Paid him to skip, hey? M—m—m—yes! I think I begin + to catch on." He could hardly restrain his mirth, and winked at me in + sheer ecstasy. + </p> + <p> + I went slowly out. When I arrived at the house I directed the servant to + say to anyone who might call that the doctor was not at home. I went to my + room and wrote to Dr. Griswold, asking him for information about Florence + Campbell, the fair patient he had sent me. "Who was she? What did he know + of her? Where were her friends?" I told him nothing of this last + development, but asked for an immediately reply, adding—"for an + important reason." + </p> + <p> + Three days later a telegram was handed to me as I drove up to my office. + It was this: + </p> + <p> + "Never heard of her. Why? Griswold?" + </p> + <p> + I did not sleep that night. For the first time my faith in Florence + Campbell wavered. Up to that time I had blamed her husband for everything. + I had woven around her a web of plausible circumstances which made her the + unwilling victim of a designing villain—an expert forger, no doubt, + who used her, without her own knowledge, as a decoy—a man of whom + she was both ashamed and afraid, but from whom she could not escape. + </p> + <p> + But how was all that to be reconciled with this revelation? Griswold did + not know her. How about his introduction and that "sulph. 12"? I looked + through my desk for Griswold's note. It was certainly his handwriting; but + I noticed, for the first time, that it did not mention her name. + </p> + <p> + Perhaps this was a loop-hole through which I might bring my fair patient—in + whom I was beginning to fear I had taken too deep an interest—without + discredit to herself. + </p> + <p> + Might she not have changed her name since Griswold treated her? I + determined to give her the benefit of this doubt until I could be sure + that it had no foundation. + </p> + <p> + I felt relieved by this respite, and, heartily ashamed of the unjust + suspicion of the moment before, I gave no hint of it in the letter I now + wrote Griswold, describing the lady, and in which I enclosed his letter of + introduction to me. + </p> + <p> + The next few days I went about my practice in a dream, and it was no doubt + due to fortuitous circumstances rather than to my skill that several of my + patients still live to tell the tale of their suffering and of my + phenomenal ability to cope with disease in all its malignant power. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0022" id="link2H_4_0022"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + V. + </h2> + <p> + In due time Griswold's letter came. I went into my office to read it. I + told myself that I had no fears for the good name of Florence Campbell. I + knew that some explanation would be made that would confirm me in my + opinion of her; but, for all that, I locked the door, and my hand was less + steady than I liked to see it, as I tore the end of the envelope. + </p> + <p> + I even remember thinking vaguely that I usually took time to open my + letters with more precision and with less disregard for the untidy + appearance of their outer covering afterward. I hesitated to read beyond + the first line, although I had so hastened to get that far. I read: "My + dear old friend," and then turned the letter over to see how long it was—how + much probable information it contained. There were four closely written + pages. I wondered if it could all be about Florence Campbell, and was + vaguely afraid that it was—and that it was <i>not</i>. I remembered + looking at the clock when I came into the office. It was nearly six + o'clock. I laid the letter down and went to the cooler and got out a + bottle of Vichy. I sat it and (placed) some wine by my elbow on the desk, + and took up the letter. + </p> + <p> + "I never heard of anyone by the name of Florence Campbell, so far as I can + recall. I certainly never had a patient by that name. Some months ago I + gave the letter you enclose—which I certainly did write—to a + patient of mine who was on her way to Europe and expected to stay some + time in New York on her way through. + </p> + <p> + "She, however, was in no way like the lady you describe. Her name was + Kittie Hatfield, and she was small, with dreamy blue eyes and flaxen hair—a + <i>perfect</i> woman, in fact." Oh! Tom! Tom! thought I—true to your + record, to the last! I had long since ceased to wonder at the lapse, + however, for Florence Campbell herself was surely sufficient explanation + of all that. "I understood"—the letter went on—"that Kittie + did not stop but a few days in New York, when she was joined by the party + with which she was to travel. She stayed at the F——— + Avenue Hotel, I have learned, and became intimate with some queer people + there—much to the indignation of her brother, when he learned of + it." + </p> + <p> + I laid the letter down and put my head on my arms, folded as they were on + the desk. I was dizzy and tired. When I raised my head it was dark. I got + up, lighted the gas, and found myself stiff and as if I had been long in a + forced and unnatural position. I recalled that I had been indignant. + </p> + <p> + This brother of the silly-pated, blue-eyed girl had not liked her to know + Florence Campbell, indeed! He was, no doubt, a precious fool—naturally + would be, with such a sister, I commented mentally. What else, I wondered, + had Griswold found out? Was the rest of this old fool's letter about her? + I began where I had left off. + </p> + <p> + "I have since learned from him that the man—whose name <i>was</i> + Campbell—was a foreigner of some kind, with a decidedly vague, not + to say, hazy reputation, and that his wife, who was supposed to be an + invalid, and an American of good family, never appeared in public, and so + was never seen by him—that is by Will Hatfield—but was only + known to him through Kittie's enraptured eyes. She was said to be bright + and pretty. Kittie is the most generous child alive in her estimate of + other women; however, he thinks it possible that Kittie either gave her + the letter from me to you, and asked her to have proper medical care, or + else that the woman, or her husband, got hold of it in a less legitimate + way; which I think quite likely. Kittie thought the Campbell woman was + charming." The "Campbell woman," indeed! I felt like a thief, even to read + such rubbish, and I should have enjoyed throttling the whole ill-natured + gossipping set—not omitting flaxen-haired Kittie herself. + </p> + <p> + I determined to finish the letter, however. + </p> + <p> + "Hatfield is so ashamed of his sister's friendship for the woman that I + had the utmost difficulty in making him tell me the whole truth, but, from + what I gathered yesterday, he thinks them most likely the head of a gang + of counterfeiters or forgers and—" + </p> + <p> + I read no further, or, if I did, I can recall only that. It was burned + into my brain, and when a loud pounding on my office-door aroused me, I + found the letter twisted and torn into a hundred pieces, the Vichy and + wine-bottles at my side half-empty, and the hands of the clock pointing to + half-past ten. + </p> + <p> + "Doctor, doctor," called my lackey; "oh, doctor! Oh, lord, I'm afraid + something's wrong with the doctor, but I'm afraid to break in the door." + </p> + <p> + I went to the door to prevent a scene. One of my best patients stood + there, with Morgan, the man. Both of them were pale and full of suppressed + excitement. + </p> + <p> + "Heavens and earth, doctor, we were afraid you were dead. I've been + waiting here a good hour for you to come home. No one knew you were in, + till Morgan peeped over the transom. What in the devil is the matter?" + said my patient. + </p> + <p> + "Tired out, went to sleep," said I; but I did not know my own voice as I + spoke. It sounded distant, and its tones were strange. + </p> + <p> + They both looked at me suspiciously, and with evident anxiety as to my + mental condition. I caught at the means of escape. + </p> + <p> + "I am too tired to see anyone to-night. In fact, I am not well. You will + have to let me off this time. Get Dr. Talbott, next door, if anyone is + sick; I am going to bed. Good-night." + </p> + <p> + There was a long pause. Then he said, wearily: "You are a young man, + doctor. You have taken the chair I left vacant at the college. I would + never have told the story to you, perhaps, only I wanted you to know why I + left the class in your care so suddenly this morning, when I uncovered the + beautiful face of the 'subject' you had brought from the morgue for me to + give my closing lecture upon. That class of shallow-pated fellows have not + learned yet that doctors—even old fellows like me—know a good + deal less than they think they do about the human race—themselves + included." + </p> + <p> + I stammered some explanation of the circumstances, and again there was a + long silence. + </p> + <p> + Then he said: + </p> + <p> + "Found drowned, was she? Poor girl! Do you believe, with that face, she + was ever a bad woman? Or that she had anything to do with the rascality of + her husband, even if he were consciously a rascal? and who is to judge of + that, knowing so little of him? Did I ever recover the five thousand + dollars? Did I attempt to recover it? Oh, no. All this happened nearly ten + years ago now; and if that were all it had cost me I should not mind. The + hotel people never knew. Why should they? This is the first time I have + told the story. You think I am an old fool? Well, well, perhaps I am—perhaps + I am; who can say what any of us are, or what we are not? Thirty years ago + I knew that I understood myself and everybody else perfectly. To-day I + know equally well that I understand neither the one nor the other. We + learn that fact, and then we die—and that is about all we do learn. + You wonder, after what I tell you, if the beautiful face at the + demonstration class this morning was really hers, or whether a strong + likeness led my eyes and nerves astray You wonder if she drowned herself, + and why? Was it an accident? Did <i>he</i> do it? This last will be + decided by each one according as he judges of Florence Campbell and her + husband—of who and what they were. Perhaps I shall try to find him + now. Not for the money, but to learn why she married the man he seemed to + be. It is hard to tell what I should learn. It is not even easy to know + just what I should <i>like</i> to learn; and perhaps, after all, it is + better not to know more—who shall say?" + </p> + <p> + And the doctor bade me good-night and bowed himself out to his carriage + with his old courtesy, and left me alone with the strange, sad story of + the beautiful girl whose lifeless form had furnished the subject of my + first lecture to a class of medical students. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0023" id="link2H_4_0023"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + MY PATIENTS STORY. + </h2> +<pre xml:space="preserve"> + <i>"Things are cruel and blind; their strength detains and deforms: + And the wearying wings of the mind still beat up the stream of their storms. + Still, as one swimming up stream, they strike out blind in the blast. + In thunders of vision and dream, and lightning of future and past. + We are baffled and caught in the current, and bruised upon edges of shoals; + As weeds or as reeds in the torrent of things are the wind-shaken souls."</i> + + Algernon Charles Swinburne. +</pre> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0024" id="link2H_4_0024"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + I. + </h2> + <p> + Perhaps I may have told you before, that at the time of which I speak, my + Summer home—where I preferred to spend much more than half of the + year—was on a sandy beach a few miles out of New York, and also that + I had retired from active practice as a physician, even when I was in the + city. + </p> + <p> + Notwithstanding these two facts, I was often called in consultation, both + in and out of the city; and was occasionally compelled to take a case + entirely into my own hands, through some accident or unforeseen + circumstance. + </p> + <p> + It was one of these accidents which brought the patient whose story I am + about to tell you, under my care. + </p> + <p> + I can hardly say now, why I retained the case instead of turning it over + to some brother practitioner, as was my almost invariable habit; but for + some reason I kept it in my own hands, and, as it was the only one for + which I was solely responsible at the time, I naturally took more than + ordinary interest in and paid more than usual attention to all that seemed + to me to bear upon it. + </p> + <p> + As you know I am an "old school" or "regular" physician, although that did + not prevent me from consulting with, and appreciating the strong points of + many of those who were of other, and younger branches of the profession. + </p> + <p> + This peculiarity had subjected me, in times gone by, to much adverse + criticism from some of my colleagues who belonged to that rigidly orthodox + faction which appears to feel that it is a much better thing to allow a + patient to die "regularly"—as it were—than it is to join + forces with one, who, being of us, is still not with us in theory and + practice. + </p> + <p> + Recognizing that we were all purblind at best, and that there was and + still is, much to learn in every department of medicine, it did not always + seem to me that it was absolutely necessary to reject, without due + consideration, the guesses of other earnest and careful men, even though + they might differ from me in the prefix to the "pathy" which forms the + basis of the conjecture. + </p> + <p> + We are all wrong so often that it has never appeared to be a matter of the + first importance—it does not present itself to my mind as absolutely + imperative—that it should be invariably the same wrong, or that all + of the mistakes should necessarily follow the beaten track of the "old + school." + </p> + <p> + I had arrived at that state of beatitude where I was not unwilling for a + life to be saved—or even for pain to be alleviated, by other methods + than my own. + </p> + <p> + I do not pretend that this exalted ethical status came to me all at once, + nor at a very early stage of my career; but it came, and I had reaped the + whirlwind of wrath, as I have just hinted to you. + </p> + <p> + So when my patient let me know, after a time, that he had been used to + homeopathic treatment, I at once suggested that he send for some one of + that school to take charge of his case. + </p> + <p> + He declined—somewhat reluctantly, I thought, still, quite + positively. But, in the course of events, when I felt that a consultation + was due to him as well as to myself, I asked him if he would not prefer + that the consulting physician should be of that school. + </p> + <p> + He admitted that he would, and I assured him that I should be pleased to + send for any one he might name. + </p> + <p> + He knew no doctor here, he said, and left it to me to send for the one in + whom I had the greatest confidence. + </p> + <p> + It is at this point my story really begins. + </p> + <p> + I stopped on my way uptown to arrange, with Dr. Hamilton, of Madison + Avenue, a consultation that afternoon, at three o'clock. I told the doctor + all that I, myself, knew at that time, of my patient's history. Three + weeks before I had been in a Fifth Avenue stage; a gentleman had politely + arisen to offer his seat to a lady at the moment that the stage gave a + sudden lurch which threw them both violently against each other and + against the end of the stage. + </p> + <p> + He broke the fall for her; but he received a blow on the head, which + member came in contact with the money-box, with a sharp crack. Accustomed + to the sight of pain and suffering as I was, the sound of the blow and his + suddenly livid face gave me a feeling of sickness which did not wholly + leave me for an hour afterward. Involuntarily I caught him in my arms—he + was a slightly built man—and directed the driver to stop at the + first hotel. + </p> + <p> + The gentleman was unconscious and I feared he had sustained a serious + fracture of the skull. He was evidently a man of culture, and I thought + not an American. I therefore wished, if possible, to save him a police or + hospital experience. + </p> + <p> + By taking him into the first hotel I reasoned, we could examine him; learn + who and what he was, where he lived, and, after reviving him, send him + home in a carriage. + </p> + <p> + The process of bringing him back to consciousness was slow, and as the + papers on his person, which we felt at liberty to examine, gave no clue to + his residence, we concluded to put him to bed and trust to farther + developments to show us what to do in the matter of removal. The lady on + whose account he had received the injury had given me her card, which bore + a name well known on the Avenue, and had stated that she would, if + necessary, be responsible for all expense at the hotel. + </p> + <p> + It was deemed best, therefore, to put him to bed, as I said before, and + wait for him to indicate, for himself, the next move. I placed in the safe + of the hotel his pocketbook, which contained a large sum of money (large + that is, for a man to carry on his person in these days of cheques and + exchanges) and his watch, which was a handsome one, with this inscription + on the inside cover, "T. C. from Florence." + </p> + <p> + The cards in his pocket bore different names and addresses, mostly + foreign, but the ones I took for his own were finely engraved, and read + "Mr. T. C. Lathro," nothing more. No address, no business; simply calling + cards, of a fashionable size, and of the finest quality. + </p> + <p> + This, as I say, was about three weeks before I concluded to call Dr. + Hamilton in consultation; and I had really learned very little more of my + patient's affairs than these facts taken from his pocket that first day + while he was still unconscious. + </p> + <p> + He was silent about himself, and while he had slowly grown better his + progress toward health did not satisfy me, nor do I think that he was + wholly of opinion, that I was doing quite all that should be done to + hasten his recovery. + </p> + <p> + He was always courteous, self-poised, and able to bear pain bravely; but I + thought he watched me narrowly, and I several times detected him in a + weary sigh and an impatient movement of the eyebrows, which did not tally + with his assumption of cheerful indifference and hospitality. + </p> + <p> + I use the word hospitality advisedly, for his effort always seemed to be + to treat me as a guest whom he must entertain, and distract from observing + his ailments, rather than as a physician whose business it was to discover + and remedy them. + </p> + <p> + He had declined to be moved; said he was a stranger; had no preferences as + to hotels; felt sure this one was as comfortable as any; thanked me over + and over for having taken him there, and changed the subject. He would + talk as long as I would allow him on any subject, airily, brightly, + readily. On any subject, that is, except himself; yet from his + conversation I had gathered that he had travelled a great deal; was a man + of wealth and culture, whether French, Italian or Russian, I could not + decide. He spoke all of these languages, and words from each fitted easily + into place when for a better English one, he hesitated or was at a loss. + </p> + <p> + Indeed, he seemed to have seen much of every country and to have observed + impartially—without national prejudice. He knew men well, too well + to praise recklessly; and he sometimes gave me the impression, I can + hardly say how, that blame was a word whose meaning he did not know. + </p> + <p> + He spoke of having seen deeds of the most appalling nature in Russia, and + talked of their perpetrators sometimes, as good and brave men. He never + appeared to measure men by their exceptional acts. + </p> + <p> + Occasionally I contested these points with him, and I am not sure but that + it may have been the interest I took in his conversation that held me as + his physician; for as I said, I was well aware that he did not improve as + he should have done after the first few days. + </p> + <p> + But I liked to hear him talk. He was a revelation to me. I greatly enjoyed + his breath and charity—if I may so express the mental attitude which + recognized neither the possession of, nor the need for, either quality in + his judgments of his fellow-men. + </p> + <p> + He had evidently not been able to pass through life under the impression + that character, like cloth, is cut to fit a certain outline, and that + after the basting-threads are once in, no farther variation need be looked + for. Indeed, I question if he would have been able to comprehend the + mental condition of those grown-up "educated" children who are never able + to outgrow the comfortable belief that words and acts have a definite, + inflexible, par-value—that an unabridged dictionary, so to speak, is + an infallible appeal; who, in short, expect their villains to be + consistently and invariably villainous, in the regulation orthodox + fashion. + </p> + <p> + Individual shades of meaning, whether of language or of character, do not + enter into their simple philosophy. Mankind suffers, in their pennyweight + scales, a shrinkage that is none the less real because they never suspect + that the dwarfage may be due to themselves—to their system of + weights and measures. All variations from their standard indicate an + unvarying tendency to mendacity. He whom they once detect in a quibble, or + in an attempt to acquire the large end of a bargain, never recovers (what + is perhaps only his rightful heritage, in spite of an occasional lapse) + the respect and confidence of these primer students who are inflexible + judges of all mental and moral manifestations. + </p> + <p> + I repeat that this comfortable and regular philosophy was foreign to my + patient's mental habits, and I began to consider, the more I talked with + him, that it did not agree with my own personal observations. I reflected + that I was not very greatly surprised, nor did I lose faith in a man + necessarily, when I discovered him in a single mean or questionable + action. + </p> + <p> + Why, then, should I be surprised to find those of whom I had known only + ill-engaged in deeds of the most unselfish nature? Deeds of heroism and + generosity such as he often recounted as a part of the life of some of + these same terrible Russian officials. There seems, however, to be that in + us which finds it far easier to reconcile a single mean or immoral action + with an otherwise upright life, than to believe it likely, or even + possible, for a depraved nature to perform, upon occasion, deeds of + exalted or unusual purity. Yet so common is the latter, that its failure + of recognition by humanity in general can be due it seems to me, only to a + wrong teaching or to a stupidity beyond even normal bounds. + </p> + <p> + For, after all, the bad man who is all bad, is really a less frequent + product than that much talked of, but rare creature, a perfect woman. + Perhaps one could count the specimens of either of these to be met with in + a life time, on the fingers of one hand. + </p> + <p> + But to return to my patient and his story. + </p> + <p> + It was of these things that he and I had often talked, and I had come to + greatly respect the self-poise and acute observation, as well as the broad + human sympathy of this reserved and evidently sad-hearted man. Sad-hearted + I knew, in spite of his keen sense of humor, and his firm grasp of + philosophy. + </p> + <p> + I gave Dr. Hamilton a brief outline of all this, as well as of the + physical condition of the man whom he was to see; for I believe it to be + quite as important for a physician to understand and diagnose the mental + as the physical conditions of those who come under his care before he can + prescribe intelligently for other than very trifling ailments. + </p> + <p> + You can imagine my surprise when I tell you that the moment Dr. Hamilton + stepped into the room, and I mentioned his name, my patient, this + self-poised man of the world, whose nerves had often seemed to me to be of + tempered steel, looked up suddenly as you have seen a timid child do when + it is sharply reproved, and fainted dead away. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0025" id="link2H_4_0025"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + II. + </h2> + <h3> + I confess that I expected a scene. + </h3> + <p> + I glanced at the doctor, but he showed no sign of ever having seen my + patient before, and went to work with me in the most methodical and + indifferent way possible to revive him. + </p> + <p> + "You did not mention that this was one of his symptoms—a peculiarity + of his. Has he been subject to this sort of thing? Did he say he was + subject to it before he hurt his head, or has it developed since?" the + doctor inquired quietly as we worked. + </p> + <p> + I bit my lip. His tone was so exasperatingly cool, while, knowing my + patient as I did, his startled manner and sudden fainting had impressed me + deeply. + </p> + <p> + "It is the first time," I said, "since he was hurt—that is, since he + recovered consciousness after the blow—that he has exhibited the + slightest tendency to anything of the kind." + </p> + <p> + I hesitated, then I said: "Doctor, if you know him; if this is the result + of seeing you suddenly (for he did not know who was to come) don't you + think—would it be well?—Do you think it best for you to be + where he will see you when he begins to revive?" + </p> + <p> + The doctor stared at me, then at my patient. "I don't know him—never + saw him before in my life so far as I know. What did you say his name is? + Mum—oh, yes, Lathro—first and only time I ever heard it. Oh, + no, I suppose his nerves are weak. The excitement of seeing me—the + idea of—a—er—consultation." I smiled, involuntarily. + "You don't know the man, doctor," said I. "He is bomb proof as to nerves + in that sense of the word. He—a—There must be some other + reason. He must have mistaken you for some one else. I am sorry to trouble + you, doctor, but would you kindly step into the other room? He will open + his eyes now, you see." + </p> + <p> + When, a moment later, my patient regained consciousuess, he glanced about + him furtively, like a hunted man. He did not look like himself. + </p> + <p> + He examined my face closely—suspiciously, I thought—for a + moment. Then I laughed lightly, and said: "Well, old fellow, you've been + trying your hand at a faint. That's a pretty way to treat a friend. I come + in to see you; you step out to nobody knows where—to no man's land—and + give me no end of trouble rowing you back to our shore. What did you eat + for dinner that served you that kind of a trick?" + </p> + <p> + He looked all about the room again, examined my face, and then smiled, for + the first time since I had known him, nervously, and said: + </p> + <p> + "I think my digestion must be pretty badly out of order. I'll declare I + saw double when you came in. I thought there were two of you; and the + other one—wasn't you." + </p> + <p> + I laughed; "That is good. Two of me, but the other one wasn't me. Well, + thank heaven there is only one of me up to date." + </p> + <p> + He smiled, but seemed disturbed still. I decided to ask him a direct + question: + </p> + <p> + "Well now, just suppose there had been two of me—is that an excuse + for you to faint? Does associating with one of me try you to that extent + that two of me would prostrate you?" + </p> + <p> + He did not take me up with his old manner. He was listless and absent. I + said that I would go down to the office and order some wine and return at + once. I slipped into the other room, and with my finger on my lips + motioned to Dr. Hamilton to pass out quietly before me. + </p> + <p> + I followed him. "There is something wrong, Doctor," I said: "I am sorry, + but I shall have to ask you to go without seeing him again. I can't tell + you why yet, but I'll try to find out and let you know. Order some + champagne sent up to me, please, as you go out, and I will see you as soon + as I can." + </p> + <p> + The moment I re-entered the room, my patient, whose restless eyes met mine + as I opened the door, said: "I thought you were talking to some one." + </p> + <p> + "I was," said I carelessly; a bell-boy, "I ordered wine. It will be up + soon." Then I changed the subject; but he was nervous and unlike himself + and none of the old topics interested him. + </p> + <p> + When the door opened for the boy with the wine an expression of actual + terror passed over my patient's face. When I left him a half hour later I + was puzzled and anxious. + </p> + <p> + <a name="link2H_4_0026" id="link2H_4_0026"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + <h2> + III. + </h2> + <p> + The moment I entered his room on the following day he said: "I thought you + had planned to have another doctor come and look me over, yesterday." He + was watching me closely as he spoke: "Did I hear you mention his name?" + </p> + <p> + Ah, thought I, here <i>is</i> a mystery in spite of Dr. Hamilton's denial. + I will try him. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," I said, "I had decided to ask the best Homeopathic doctor I know, a + skilful man, especially successful in diagnosing cases, to overhaul you + and see if he agrees with me that you ought to be on your feet this + blessed minute, if my diagnosis of your case is entirely right. I don't + see why you are still so weak. He may find the spring that I have missed. + Why?" + </p> + <p> + "Did you—I am not acquainted with the doctors here,—I think + you said his name is—?" + </p> + <p> + "I have not mentioned his name to you," I said, "but the one I had in mind + is Dr. Hamilton of—— Madison Avenue." + </p> + <p> + There was no doubt about it, the color rose slowly to his face, and he was + struggling for self-control. At length he said: "No, I do not wish to see + another doctor. I am perfectly satisfied with you. I am—I say—no, + positively do not ask him; that is, do not ask anyone to come unless I + know and definitely agree to it. And I certainly shall want to know who he + is first." + </p> + <p> + All this was wholly foreign to the man, to his nature and habit. + </p> + <p> + "Tell me," I said, "what you have against Dr. Hamilton, for I cannot fail + to see that there is something behind all this." + </p> + <p> + He did not reply for some time; then he said wearily, but with great depth + of feeling. + </p> + <p> + "I suppose I may as well tell you. I cannot forgive him for an injury I + did him long ago." + </p> + <p> + I did not say anything nor did I look at him. Presently he went on + hoarsely; "If I had only injured him, perhaps I could get over it but I + took a mean advantage of—I did it through a woman who liked him—and + whom he—loved and trusted." There was another long silence; then I + said; "You were right to tell me, Lathro. You need not fear that I will + betray you to him, and he does not know you. He did not recognize you + either before or after you fainted. Of course I knew there was something + wrong. He will not come again." + </p> + <p> + He sprang to his feet, and a wave of red surged into his face. "I knew it! + I knew I had seen him! I was sure it was not a delusion," he said. "He was + here. No, he would not know me. He never saw me. I did not injure him like + a man, I struck from behind a woman. A woman who cared for his respect, + and I let him blame her. I suppose I could get over it if it were not for + that. I came back here partly to let him know, if I could some way, that + she was not to blame"—there was another long silence—"and + partly to get rid of myself. Russia did not do it,—Turkey,—France—none + of them. I thought perhaps he would—I had some sort of a wild idea + that he might settle with me some way. I have carried that forged cheque + in my brain, until—" + </p> + <p> + I started visibly. I had had no idea that it was so bad as this. I changed + my position to hide or cover the involuntary movement I had made, but he + had seen it and the color died out of his face. He forced himself to begin + again. "I carried that forged check," he was articulating now with + horrible distinctness, "wherever I went. She never knew anything about it. + She knew I was—she thought, or feared, that I might be somewhat—what + you Americans call crooked; but she did not know the truth, not until the + very last. She knew that I had been unreliable in some ways long ago; but + she did not dream of the worst. At last,—sometimes I think I was a + fool to have done it,—but I told her. I told her the whole truth, + and—she left me. She had borne everything till then. I think she + came here. Before long I followed. She told me not to, and I said I would + not; but of course I did. I could not help it. I knew then, and I know + now, that I am putting myself into the clutches of the law; but I do not + care—not now— since I cannot find Florence Campbell." + </p> + <p> + He pronounced the name as if it were a treasure wrung from him by force. + "It is the only really criminal thing I ever did. I do not know why I did + it. They say that crime—a taste for it, develops slowly, by degrees. + Maybe so; but not with me, not with me. + </p> + <p> + "I had money enough; but—oh, my God! how I hated him. I saw that he + was growing to love her without knowing it. I often heard them talking + together. They did not know it, and if they had it could not have been + more innocent; but I was madly jealous, for the first time in my life. I + determined to make him think ill of her, and yet I said just now that + forgery was my only crime. That was worse, by far, but I believe it is not + a crime in law." + </p> + <p> + He smiled scornfully. "I have outgrown all that now. The storm has left me + the wreck you see; but I thought it all out last night, and determined to + tell you. You are to tell—him—for her sake," he said between + his set teeth. + </p> + <p> + "He may see her yet some day. She will never return to me—God bless + her! God help us both!" + </p> + <p> + "No, she will never return to you nor to anyone else," I said, as gently + as I could. + </p> + <p> + He sprang up with the energy of a maniac. "How do you know? What do you + know?" he demanded. + </p> + <p> + "I only know that she is dead, my friend," I said, placing my hand on his + arm, "and that Dr. Hamilton does not wish to punish you. I heard it all; + the story of the forgery of his name, and that a Florence Campbell was in + some way connected with it. I heard it from him long, long ago; but he + does not know that you are Tom Campbell. You are safe." + </p> + <p> + "Does not wish to punish me! I am safe! Great God, no one could punish me. + I do that. Safe! Oh, the irony of language!" + </p> + <p> + There was a long pause. He had gone to the window and was staring out into + the darkness. + </p> + <p> + Presently the sound of convulsive sobbing filled the room; I thought best + to remain near the door and make no effort to check his grief with words. + </p> + <p> + At last the storm spent itself. He came slowly into the middle of the room + and stood facing me. At length he said: + </p> + <p> + "One of the greatest punishments is gone, thank God. Florence Campbell is + dead, you say. Do you know what it is, Doctor, to wish that one you loved + was dead?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, yes." I said; "but it is best for you not to talk any more—nor + think, just now—not of that—not of that." + </p> + <p> + He broke in impatiently—"Don't you know me well enough yet to know + that that sort of thing—that sort of professional humbug is useless? + Must not talk more of that—nor think of it, indeed! What else do you + suppose I ever think of? The good men who are bad and the bad ones who are + good—the puppets of our recent conversations? Suppose we boil it + down a little. Am I a bad man? That is a question that puzzles me. Am I a + good one? At least I can answer <i>that</i>—and yet I never did but + one criminal deed in my whole life, and I have done a great many so-called + good ones to set over against it." + </p> + <p> + "Then you can answer neither question with a single word," I said. He took + my hand and pressed it with the frenzy of a new hope. + </p> + <p> + "At least one man's philosophy is not all words," he said. "You act upon + your theories. You are the only one I ever knew who did." + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps I am the only one you ever gave the chance," I replied, still + holding his hand. + </p> + <p> + We stood thus silent for a moment, then he said with an inexpressible + accent of satire: "Would you advise me to try it, doctor, with anyone + else?" I deliberated some time before I replied. Then I said: "No, I am + sorry to say that I fear it would not be safe. There is still so much + tiger in the human race. No, do not tell your story again to any one; it + can do no good. Most certainly I would advise you <i>not</i> to try it + ever again." + </p> + <p> + As I left the room he said: "True, true. It can do no good, none + whatever." + </p> + <p> + The next day he left. I never saw him again. Two years later I received a + kind letter from him in which he greatly over-estimated all I had done for + him. The letter came from St. Petersburg and was signed "T. Lathro + Campbell, Col. Imperial Guard." + </p> + <p> + I fancied, in spite of his letter, that he would rather sever all + connection with this country, and feel that he had no ties nor past; so I + never answered his letter. + </p> + <p> + Sometimes I wonder if he misunderstood my silence, and accepted it as a + token of unfriendliness—and yet—well, I have never been able + to decide just what would be least painful to him; so I let it drift into + years of silence, and perhaps, after all, these very good intentions of + mine may be only cobble-stones added to the paving of the streets of a + certain dread, but very populous city which is, in these days of + agnosticism quite a matter of jest in polite society. + </p> + <p> + Who shall say? Which would he prefer, friendly communication or silence + and forgetfulness? + </p> + <p> + THE END + </p> + <div style="height: 6em;"> + <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> + </div> + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Thoughtless Yes, by Helen H. Gardener + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A THOUGHTLESS YES *** + +***** This file should be named 18892-h.htm or 18892-h.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/1/8/8/9/18892/ + +Produced by David Widger + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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Gardener + +Release Date: March 13, 2013 [EBook #18892] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A THOUGHTLESS YES *** + + + + +Produced by David Widger + + + + + + +A THOUGHTLESS YES + +By Helen H. Gardener + +Author Of + +"Men, Women, and Gods;" "Sex in Brain;" "Pulpit, Pew, and Cradle;" "Is +this Your Son, my Lord?" "Pushed by Unseen Hands," "Pray you, Sir, whose +Daughter?" "An Unofficial Patriot," and "Facts and Fictions of Life." + +Tenth Edition. + +Copyright, 1890, + + + + +Dedication. + +To the many strangers who, after reading such of these stories as have +before been printed, have written me letters that were thoughtful or gay +or sad, I dedicate this volume. + +These letters have come from far and near; from rich and from poor; from +Christian and from unbeliever; from a bishop's palace and from behind +prison walls. + +If this collection of stories shall give to my friends, known and +unknown, as much pleasure and mental stimulus as their letters gave to +me, I shall be content. + +HELEN H. GARDENER. + + +CONTENTS + +A Splendid Judge of a Woman + +The Lady of the Club + +Under Protest + +For the Prosecution + +A Rusty Link in the Chain + +The Boler House Mystery + +The Time-lock of Our Ancestors + +Florence Campbell's Fate + +My Patient's Story + + + + +PREFACE TO THE EIGHTH EDITION. + +In issuing a new edition of this book, it has been thought wise to state +that an unauthorized edition is now on the market, and it is desirable +that the public shall know that all copies of this book not bearing the +imprint of the Commonwealth Company are sold against the will and in +violation of the rights of the author. + +Since some persons have been puzzled to make the connection between +the title of the book and the stories themselves, and to apply Colonel +Ingersoll's exquisite autograph sentiment more clearly, a part of "An +Open Letter," which was written in reply to an editorial review of the +book when it first appeared, is here reprinted, in the hope that it may +remove the difficulty for all. + + + + +AN OPEN LETTER. + +I have, this morning, read your review of "A Thoughtless Yes." I wish +to thank you for the pleasant things said and also to make the +connection--which I am surprised to see did not present itself to your +mind--between the title and the burden of the stories or sketches. + +It is not so easy as you may suppose to get a title which shall be +exactly and fully descriptive of a collection of tales or sketches, +each one of which was written to suggest thoughts and questions on some +particular topic or topics to which people usually pay the tribute of a +thoughtless yes. With one--possibly two--exceptions each sketch means to +suggest to the reader that there may be a very large question mark put +after many of the social, religious, economic, medical, journalistic, or +legal fiats of the present civilization. + +You say that "in 'The Lady of the Club' she [meaning me] does not show +how poverty results from a thoughtless yes. Perhaps she does not see +that it does." I had in my mind exactly that point when I wrote the +story and when I decided upon the title for the book. No, I do not +attempt in such sketches to show _how_, but to show _that_, such and +such conditions exist and that it is wrong. I want to suggest a question +of the justice and the right of several things; but I want to leave each +person free to think out, not my conclusion or remedy, but a conclusion +and a remedy, and at all events to make him refuse, henceforth, the +thoughtless yes of timid acquiescence to things as they are simply +because they are. In the "Lady of the Club" I meant to attack the +impudent authority that makes such a condition of poverty possible, +by calling sympathetic attention to its workings. There are one or two +other ideas sustained by authority, to which, to the readers of that +tale, I wished to make a thoughtless yes henceforth impossible. At least +I hoped to arouse a question. One is taxation of church property. I +wished to point out that by shirking their honest debts churches heap +still farther poverty and burden upon the poor. I hoped, too, to +suggest that the idea of "charity," to which most people give a warmly +thoughtless yes, must be an indignity or impossibility where, even they +would say, it was most needed. I wanted to call attention to the fact +that a physician and a man of tender heart and lofty soul were compelled +to make themselves criminals, before the law, to even be kind to the +dead. That conditions are so savage under the present system that such a +case is absolutely hopeless while the victims live and outrageous after +they are dead. To all of these dictates of impudent authority, to which +most story readers pay the tribute of a thoughtless yes, I wanted to +call attention in such a way that henceforth a question must arise in +their minds. I hoped to show, too, that even so lofty a character +as Roland Barker was tied hand and foot--until it made him almost a +madman--by a system of economics and religion and law which so interlace +as to sustain each other and combine to not only crush the poor but to +prevent the rich from helping along even where they desire to do so. + +These were the main points upon which that particular tale was intended +to arouse a mental attitude of thoughtful protest There are other, minor +ones, which I need not trouble you to recall. If you will notice, nearly +all of the tales end (or stop without an end) with an open question for +the reader to settle--to settle his way, not mine. Indeed, I am not yet +convinced that my own ideas of the changes needed and the way to bring +them about are infallible. I am still open to conviction. I have tried +to grasp the Socialist, Communist, Anarchist, Single-tax, Free-land, and +other ideas and to comprehend just what each could be fairly expected +to accomplish if established--to see the _pros_ and _cons_ of these +and other schemes for social improvement. These, and the varying cults +ranged between, each seems to me to have certain strong points and +certain weak ones. Each seems to me to overlook some essential feature; +and yet I have no system to offer that I think would be better or would +work better than some of these. Indeed, I do most earnestly believe that +_the_ inspired way is yet to be struck out, and I do not believe that +I am the one to do it Meanwhile I can do some things. I can suggest +questions, and, sometimes, answers. But I am not a god, and I do not +want all people to answer my way. I do want to help prevent, now and +henceforth, the tribute of a thoughtless yes from being given to a good +many established wrongs. + +Since such able thinkers as you are have--in the main--already refused +such tribute, I am perfectly satisfied to let each of these answer the +questions I have suggested or may suggest in my fiction in the way that +seems most hopeful to him. + +Meantime, the vast majority of story readers have not yet had their +emotions touched by the dramatic presentation of "the other side." +Fiction has--in the main--worked to make them accept without question +all things as authority has presented them. Who knows but that a lofty +discontent may be stirred in some soul who can solve the awful problems +and at the same time reconcile the various cults of warring philosophers +so that they may combine for humanity and cease to divide for +revenue--or personal pique? I do not believe that the province of a +story is to assume to give the solution of philosophical questions that +have puzzled and proved too much for the best and ablest brains. I have +no doubt that fiction may stir and arouse to thought many who cannot +understand and will not heed essays or argument or preaching, while +it may also present the same thoughts in a new light to those who do. +Personally I do not believe in tacking on to fiction a "moral" or an +"in conclusion" which shall switch all such aroused thoughts into one +channel. Clear thinking and right feeling may lead some one, who is new +to such protest, to solutions that I have not reached. So let us each +question "impudent authority," whether it be in its stupid blindness to +heredity or to environment; and I shall be content that you solve the +new order by an appeal to Anarchism _via_ free land; or that Matilda +Joslyn Gage solve it by the ballot for women and hereditary freedom from +slavish instincts stamped upon a race bom of superstitious and subject +mothers. + +Personally I do not believe that all the free land, free money or +freedom in the world, which shall leave the mothers of the race (whether +in or out of marriage) a subject class or in a position to transmit to +their children the vices or weaknesses of a dominated dependent, will +ever succeed in populating the world with self-reliant, self-respecting, +honorable and capable people. + +On the other hand, I do not see how the ballot in the hands of woman +will do for her all that many believe it will. That it is her right +and would go far is clear; but after that, your question of economics +touches her in a way that it does not and cannot touch men, and I am +free to confess that as yet I have heard of no economic or social plan +that would not of necessity, in my opinion, bear heaviest upon those who +are mothers. So you will see that when I suggested the desirability in +"For the Prosecution" of having mothers on the bench and as jurors where +a case touched points no man living does or can understand in all its +phases, I do not think that would right all the wrong nor solve all the +questions suggested by such a trial; but I thought it would help push +the car of right and justice in the direction of light which we all hope +is ahead. + +You believe more in environment than in heredity; I believe in both, and +that both are sadly and awfully awry, largely because too many people +in too many ways pay to impudent authority the tribute of a thoughtless +yes. + +It is one of the saddest things in this world to see the brave and +earnest men who fight so nobly for better and fairer economic conditions +for "Labor," pay, much too often, the tribute of a thoughtless yes to +the absolute pauper status of all womanhood They resent with spirit +the idea that men should labor for a mere subsistence and always be +dependent upon and at the financial mercy of the rich. They do not +appear to see that to one-half of the race even that much economic +independence would be a tremendous improvement upon her present status. +How would Singletax or Free-land help this? You may reply that Anarchism +would solve that problem. Would it? With maternity and physical +disabilities in the scale? To my mind, all the various economic schemes +yet put forward lack an essential feature. They provide for a free +and better manhood, but they pay the tribute of a thoughtless yes to +impudent authority in the case of womanhood, in many things. And so long +as motherhood is serfhood, just so long will this world be populated +with a race easy to subjugate, weak to resist oppression, criminal +in its instincts of cruelty toward those in its power, and humble and +subservient toward authority and domination. Character rises but little +above its source. The mother molds the man. If she have the status, the +instincts, and the spirit of a subordinate, she will transmit these, +and the more enlightened she is the surer is this, because of her +consciousness of her own degradation. + +Look at the Kemmler horror. People all marvel at his "brutish nature +and his desire to kill." No one says anything about the fact, which was +merely mentioned at his trial, that his "father was a butcher and his +mother helped in the business." Did you know that this is also true of +Jesse Pomeroy; the boy who "from infancy tortured animals and killed +whatever he could?" + +Would all this sort of thing mean absolutely nothing to women of the +same social and scientific status enjoyed by the men who assisted at the +trials of these two and at the legal murder of one? In ordinary women, +of course, it would not stir very deep thought But these were not +ordinary men. They were far more than that, Almost all the women who +have spoken or written to me of the Kemmler horror have touched that +thought Have you heard a man discuss it? Is there a reason for this? Do +we pay the tribute of a thoughtless yes to all that clusters about the +present ideas on such subjects and about their criminal medicolegal +aspects? But this letter grows too long. + +With great respect and hearty good wishes, + +I am sincerely, + +Helen H. Gardener. + + + + +A SPLENDID JUDGE OF A WOMAN. + +_"We look at the one little woman's face we lovey as we look at the +face of our mother earth, and see all sorts of answers to our own +yearnings."_--George Eliot. + + +"But after all it is not fair to blame her as you do, Cuthbert. She is +what she must be. It is not at all strange. Midge--" + +"I am quite out of patience with you, Nora;" exclaimed Cuthbert Wagner, +vehemently. "How can you excuse her? Midge, as you call her, has been no +friend to you. She was deceitful and designing all along. She even tried +in every way she could think of to undermine you in _my_ affections!" He +tossed his head contemptuously and strode to the window where he stood +glaring out into the moonlight in fierce and indignant protest. His wife +had so often spoken well of Margaret Mintem. She did not appear to hold +the least resentment toward the school-friend of her past years, while +Cuthbert could see nothing whatever that was good or deserving of +praise in the character of the young lady in question. He was bitterly +resentful because Margaret Mintem had spoken ill of his wife while she +was only his betrothed, and Cuthbert Wagner did not forgive easily. + +Nora crossed the room with her swift, graceful tread, and the sweep of +her lace gown over the thick rug had not reached her husband's ear as he +stood thumping on the window pane. He started a little, therefore, when +a soft hand was laid upon his arm and a softer face pressed itself close +to his shoulder. + +"It is very sweet of you, dear," she said in her low, gentle voice, +"It is very sweet of you to feel so keenly any thrust made at me; but +darling, you are unfair to Midge, poor girl! My heart used often to +bleed for her. It must be terribly hard for her to fight her own nature, +as she does,--as she _must_,--and lose the battle so often after all." + +"Fight fiddle-sticks!" said Cuthbert, and then went on grumbling in +inarticulate sounds, at which his wife laughed out merrily. + +"Oh, boo, boo, boo," she said, pretending to imitate his unuttered +words. + +"I don't believe a word of it. _I know Margaret Mintern_. Did I not +room with her for three long years? And do I not know that she is a good +girl, and a very noble one, too, in spite of her little weakness of envy +or jealousy? + +"She can't help that. I am sure she must be terribly humiliated by it. +Indeed, indeed, dear, I know that she is; but she cannot master it. It +is a part of her. I do not know whether she was bom with it or not; but +I do know that all of her life since she was a very little girl she has +been so situated that just that particular defect in her character is +the inevitable result. Don't you believe, Cuthbert, that all such things +are natural productions? Why, dearie, it seems to me that you might as +reasonably feel angry with me because my hair is brown as toward Midge +because her envy sometimes overbears her better qualities. The real +fault lies--" + +"O Nora, suppose you take the stump! Lecture on 'Whatever is is right,' +and have done with it." + +"Aha, my dear," laughed his wife, "I have caught you napping again. I do +not say that it is right; but I do say that it is natural for Margaret +to be just what she is. That is just the point people always overlook, +it seems to me. Nature is wrong about half of the time--even inanimate +nature. Just look over there! See those splendid mountains and the +lovely little valley all touched with moonlight; but, oh, how the +eye longs for water! A lake, a splendid river, the ocean in the +distance--something that is water--_anything_ that is water! But no, it +is valley and mountain and mountain and valley, until the most beautiful +spot in the world, when first you see it, grows hateful and tiresome and +lacking in the most important feature." + +Cuthbert laughed. "A lake would look well just over there by McGuire's +barn, now, wouldn't it? And, come to think of it, how a few mountains +would improve things over at Newport or Long Beach." He stopped to thump +a bug from his wife's shoulder. + +"How pretty you look in that black lace, little woman. I don't believe +nature needed any improver once in her life anyhow--when she made you." + +Nora smiled. A pleased, gratified little dimple made itself visible at +one corner of her mouth. Her husband stooped over and kissed it lightly, +just as the portiere was drawn aside and a guest announced by James, the +immaculate butler. + +"We've just been having a quarrel, Bailey," said Mr. Wagner, as he +advanced to greet the visitor, "and now I mean to leave it to you if--" + +"Yes," drawled Mr. Bailey, "I noticed that as I came in. You were just +punctuating your quarrel as James drew back the portiere. That is the +reason I coughed so violently as I stepped inside. Don't be alarmed +about my health. It isn't consumption. It is only assumption, I do +assure you. I assumed that you assumed that you were alone--that there +wasn't an interested spectator; but, great Scott! Bert, I don't blame +you, so don't apologize;" and with a low bow of admiration to his +friend's wife, he joined in the laugh. + +"But what was the row? I'm consumed to hear it," he added, as they were +seated. "I should be charmed to umpire the matter--so long as it ended +that way. Now, go on; but I want to give you fair warning, old man, that +I am on Mrs. Wagner's side to start with, so you fire off your biggest +guns and don't attempt to roll any twisted balls." + +"_Curved_ balls," laughed Nora, "not twisted; and it seems to me you +mixed your games just a wee bit. There isn't any game with guns and +balls both, is there?" + +"Oh, yes, yes indeed," replied Mr. Bailey, promptly. "The old, old game +in which there is brought to bear a battery of eyes." + +"Oh, don't," said Cuthbert. "I am not equal to it! But after all, I +can't see that you are well out of this, Ned. Where do the balls come +in?" + +"What have you against eyeballs that roll in a fine frenzy when a +battery of handsome eyes is trained upon a bashful fellow like me?" he +asked quite gravely, and then all three laughed and Cuthbert pretended +to faint. + +"I shall really have to protest, myself, if you go any farther, Mr. +Bailey," said Nora. + +"You are getting into deep water, and if you are to be on my side in the +coming contest, I want you to have a cool head and--" + +"A clean heart;" put in Cuthbert. + +"Mrs. Wagner never asks for impossibilities, I am sure," said Mr. +Bailey, dryly. + +"But she does. That is just it. She wants to make me believe that a girl +who traduced her and acted like a little fiend generally, is an adorable +creature--a natural production which couldn't help itself--had to behave +that way. We--" + +"I believe I started in by saying that I should be on your side, Mrs. +Wagner," said their guest, assuming a judicial attitude and bracing +himself behind an imaginary pile of accumulated evidence, "but I'm +beginning to wobble already. If Bert makes another home run like that, I +warn you, madam, that while I shall endeavor to be a fair and impartial +judge, I shall decide against you." + +Nora's eyes had a twinkle in their depths for an instant, but her face +had grown grave. + +"Wait. Let me tell you." she said. "Even Cuthbert does not know just +how it was--what went to make my old school-friend's character precisely +what it became. It was like this: When she was a very little girl her +father died, and the poor little mother went back home with her four +young children, and her crushed pride, to be an additional burden to +the already overburdened father, who was growing old and who had small +children of his own still to educate and pilot through society. +He had lost his hold on business when he went into the army; and +although he came home a general, quite covered with glory, a large +family cannot live on glory, you know, and fame will not buy party +dresses for three daughters and a grandchild." + +"I've noticed that," remarked Mr. Bailey, dryly. + +"The added importance of his position and the consequent publicity made +the handsome party gowns all the more necessary, however," said Nora, +not heeding the interruption, "and so the family had to do a great many +things that were not pleasant to make even one end meet, as poor Midge +used to say. The General loved brains and his granddaughter was very +bright." + +Cuthbert gave a low whistle. He would not compromise. If he found one +thing wrong in an acquaintance all things were wrong. It followed, +therefore, in his mind, that since Margaret Min-tern had been guilty of +envy, she was altogether unlikely to possess fine mental capabilities. +He would not even allow that she was stylish and sang well. + +His wife took no notice of his outburst, but her color deepened a little +as she went on. + +"She was the most clever girl mentally that I have ever known and she +was a vast deal of service to me in the years we were together. She +sharpened my wits and stimulated my thoughts in a thousand ways, for +which I am her debtor still. But I am getting ahead of my story. As I +say, the old General worshipped brains, but he also adored beauty; and, +alas, his granddaughter was quite plain--" + +"Ugly as a hedge-fence, and I never could see that she was so +superhumanly brilliant or stylish, as you claim, either," put in +Cuthbert Wagner, as he leaned back in his deep chair with his eyes drawn +to a narrow line. + +"She was almost exactly the same age of her Aunt Julia, the General's +youngest daughter; but Julia was a dream of beauty and of stupidity." + +"Situation is now quite plain," said Mr. Bailey. "The lovely Julie got +there. She always does, and--" + +"Ah, but you must remember that in this case 'there' was the heart of +the father of one and the grandfather of the other," said Nora, smiling. + +Her husband laughed outright and faced Mr. Bailey. + +"I rather think she has got you now, old man. In a case like that +I'm hanged if I know how it would turn out--who would get there. The +elements won't mix. It is not the usual thing. + +"The beautiful stupid and the brilliant but plain are all +right,--regular stage properties, so to speak,--but the grandfather! +I'll wager if we tossed up for it, and you got heads and I got tails +we'd both be wrong. + +"There is something actually uncanny in the aged grandparent ingredient +in a conundrum like that. Now if it were a young fellow,--only the +average donkey,--why of course the lovely Julia would bear off the +palm and leave Midge, as Nora calls her, to pine away. But if it were a +level-headed, middle-aged chap like me, brains would take precedence." +He waved his hand lightly toward his wife, who parted her lips over a +set of little white teeth and a radiant smile burst forth. + +"You are a bold hypocrite, Bert," said Mr. Bailey. "You did not have to +make any such choice, and you are not entitled to the least credit in +the premises. You got both." + +"This is really quite overwhelming," laughed Nora; "but--" + +"Why on earth did you call her attention to it, Ned," exclaimed Mr. +Wagner, with great pretence of annoyance. "She would have swallowed it +whole. I wonder why it is a woman so loves to be told that you married +her for her intellect, when in nine hundred and ninety-nine cases out +of eight hundred and forty you did nothing of the kind, and she knows +it perfectly well. You married her because you loved her, brains or no +brains, beauty or no beauty, and that's an end of it. Isn't that so, +Ned?" + +"Well, I'm not prepared to say, yet. I am umpire. I have not made up my +mind which I shall marry--the lovely Julia, or the brilliant niece; but +I think I shall in the long run." + +"God help you if you do!" said Cuthbert, dramatically. "I don't know +Julia, the beautiful; but I'd hate to see you married to a cat with +uncut claws, Ned, much as I think you need dressing down from time to +time." + +"Mrs. Wagner," said Mr. Bailey, turning to her, gravely, "I'm not paying +the least attention to him, and I am eager to hear how the grandfather +got out of it." + +"The _grandfather!_" exclaimed Nora, "why I had no idea of telling his +story. It was the two girls I was interested in--or at least, in one of +them; but that is just like a man. He--" + +She allowed her feather fan to fall in her lap and looked up helplessly. +"But come to think of the other side, his story _would_ be worth +telling, wouldn't it? It must have been a rather trying situation for +him, too." + +She took the fan up again, and waved it before her, thoughtfully. "I +wonder why I never thought of that before. I have always rather blamed +him for developing his granddaughter's one sad defect. I thought he +should have guarded her against it. And--I do wonder if it is because I +am a woman that I never before thought how very difficult it must have +been for him?" + +"No doubt, no doubt," said her husband, dryly. "But now that we have +shed a few tears over our mental shortcomings and lack of breadth of +sympathy in overlooking the sad predicament of the doughty General, +proceed. The umpire sleepeth apace, and I've got to have my shy at the +charming Midge before we've done with her," and he shut his paper-knife +with a wicked little click. + +"You can see how it would be," Nora began again, quite gravely, and the +gentlemen both smiled. "You can see how it would be. The granddaughter +was made to feel that she was in the way--was a burden. Her mother +would urge her to become indispensable to the old General. To read to +him, talk brightly to him, sing and play for him, watch his moods and +meet them cleverly. It was all done as a race for his affections. Julia +raced with her, setting her beauty and the other great fact that she was +the child of his old age over against the entertaining qualities of her +rival." + +Mr. Bailey drew his handkerchief across his brow and looked helplessly +perplexed, while Cuthbert responded with a dreary shake of the head. + +"It is a clear case of 'The Lady or the Tiger,' yet, so far as I can +see," said he. "Who got there, Bailey?" + +Mr. Bailey smiled despairingly, and shook his head, but said nothing. + +"It went on like that day after day, week after week, month after month, +year after year," continued Nora, looking steadily in front of her and +shivering a little, "until they were both young ladies. The General +gave a party to present them both to society at the same time. His +granddaughter tried to make him feel that he was repaid for the +expense and trouble by the display of her exceptional powers as a +conversationalist--Julia, by the display of her neck and shoulders, her +exquisite rose-leaf face, and her childishly pretty manners. This sort +of rivalry would have been well enough, no doubt, if it had not been +for the fact that from childhood up to this culmination there had been +a dash of bitterness in it, an un-der-current of antagonism; and poor +Midge had always been the main sufferer, because she was very sensitive +and she was made to feel that all she received was taken from her aunt +Julia. To stand first with her father, Julia would do almost anything; +and the ingenuity with which she devised cruel little stabs at Midge was +simply phenomenal. To be absolutely necessary to him became almost a +mania with his granddaughter." + +"If this thing goes on much longer, I am going to have a fit," Cuthbert +announced, placidly. + +"The girl you judge so harshly, poor child, had a great many of them," +said Nora, with an inflection in her voice that checked a laugh on Mr. +Bailey's lips. "Fits of depression, fits of anger, fits of sorrow, fits +of shame and of indignation with herself and with others. For there were +times when she stooped to little meannesses which her sensitive soul +abhorred. If intense effort resulted, after all, in failure, envy of +her successful rival grew up in her heart; and, sometimes, if it were +carefully cultivated by the pruning hook of sarcasm or an unkind look of +triumph, she would say or do a mean or underhand thing, and then regret +it passionately when it was too late." + +Cuthbert gave a grunt of utter incredulity. + +"Regretted it so little she'd do it again next day," he grumbled. Nora +went steadily on. + +"It grew to be the one spring and impulse of her whole nature--the +necessity of her existence--to stand _first_ with the ruling spirit +wherever she was, whoever it might be. At school I have known her to +sit up all night to make sure that she would be letter-perfect in her +lessons the following morning. Not because she cared for her studies so +much as because she _must_ feel that she stood first in the estimation +of her teachers. And then, too, her grandfather would know and be proud +of her. It got to be nature with her (I do not know how much of the +tendency may have been born in her) to need to stand on the top wherever +she was. (It has always seemed to me that the conditions surrounding her +were quite enough to explain this characteristic without an appeal to a +possible heredity of which I can know nothing.) Even where we boarded, +although she disliked the women and looked down upon the young men, she +made them all like her, and even went the length of allowing one young +fellow to ask her to marry him simply because she saw that he was +interested in me." + +"Humph! She--" began Cuthbert, but his wife held up her hand to check +him, and did not pause in her story. + +"Up to that time she had not given him a thought, and she was very angry +when he finally asked the great question. She thought that he should +have known that such a girl as she was could not be for a man of his +limitations. She felt insulted. She flew up stairs and cried with +indignation. 'The mere idea!' she said to me. 'How dared he! The common +little biped!' I told her that she had encouraged him, and had brought +unnecessary pain upon him as well as regret upon herself. Then she was +angry with me. By and by she put her hand out in the darkness and +took mine and pressed it. Then she said, 'Nora, it _was_ my +fault; but--but--' and then she began to sob again. 'But, Nora, I +don't--know--why--I--did--it--and,' there was a long pause. 'And, +beside, I _thought_ he was in love with you,'" she sobbed out. + +"That was the whole story," said Cuthbert, resentfully. "She simply +wanted to supplant you and--" + +"Yes, that _was_ the whole story, as you say, dear," said his wife, +gently; "but the poor girl could not help it. And--and she did not +understand it herself at all." + +"You make me provoked, Nora," said Cuthbert, almost sharply. "She wasn't +a fool. She tried the same game on me a year or two later; but that +time it didn't work. She even went the length of talking ill of you to +me--saying little cutting things--when she found I had utterly succumbed +to your attractions. I have to laugh yet when I think of it,--that is, +when it don't make me too angry to laugh,--how I gave her a good round +talking to." He laughed now at the recollection. + +"She must have taken me for her delightful old grandparent the way I +lectured her. But when I remembered how loyal you were to her, it just +made my blood boil and I told her so." + +Mr. Bailey shifted his position and began to contemplate giving a +verdict emphatically against the absent lady, when Nora checked him by a +wave of her fan. + +"Yes, I know she did, Cuthbert, and I know everything you said to her. +You were very cruel--if you had understood, as you did not and do not +yet. She came and told me all about it." Cuthbert Wagner gave a low, +incredulous whistle, and even Mr. Bailey looked sceptical. + +"She came back from that drive with you the most wretched girl you ever +saw. Her humiliation was pitiful to see. Her self-reproach was touching +and real. I believe she would have killed herself if I had seemed to +blame her." + +Cuthbert snapped out: + +"Humph! Very likely; and gone and done the same thing again the next +day." + +"Possibly that is true--if there had been a next day with a new +temptation that was too strong for her on the shore where she landed +after death If--" + +"If the Almighty had shown a preference for some one else, hey?" asked +Mr. Bailey, flippantly. + +"No doubt, no doubt," acquiesced Nora. "But suppose you had a weak leg +and it gave way at a critical moment--say just when you were entering +an opera box to greet a lady. Suppose it dropped you in a ridiculous or +humiliating manner. You would rage and be distressed, and make up your +mind not to let it occur again, except in the seclusion of your own +apartments; but--well, it would be quite as likely to serve you the same +trick the following week, in church." + +"The illustration does not strike me as quite fair," said Mr. Bailey, +judicially. + +"Good, Ned! Don't let her argue you into an interest in that little cat. +She was simply a malicious little--" + +"Wait, then," said Nora, ignoring her husband's outburst and looking +steadily at Margaret Mintem's new judge, who was showing signs of +passing a sentence no less severe than if it were delivered by Cuthbert +Wagner himself. + +"Suppose we take your memory. Are there not some names or dates that +_will_ drop out at times and leave you awkwardly in the lurch?" + +"Well, rather," said Mr. Bailey, disgustedly. This was his weak spot. + +"Now, don't you see that a person who has a perfect memory might be as +unfair to you as you are to my old school friend in her little moral +weakness--if we may call it by so harsh a term as that? That was her one +vulnerable spot. It may have been born in her. That I do not know; but +I insist that it _was_ trained and drilled into her as much as her +arithmetic or her catechism were, and with a result as inevitable. She +loathed her fault, but it was too strong for her. Her resolution to +conquer it dropped just short of success very often, indeed; and oh! how +it did hurt her when she realized it and thought it all over, for her +motives were unusually pure, and her moral sense was really very high +indeed." + +"Moral sense was a little frayed at the edges, I think." + +"Don't, Cuthbert. You are such a cruelly severe judge. I know Mr. Bailey +is on my side, now, and will think you very unfair. He does not mean +to be, I assure you, Mr. Bailey, and if she had not spoken ill of me he +would see the case fairly. But what _are_ you thinking?" + +"That it is a rather big question. That I--that I have overstayed my +time. I just came over to ask you to dine with us next Thursday. My +mother has some friends and wants you to meet them. May I leave my +judicial decision open until then?" + +"Certainly. Pray over it," said Cuthbert, rising; "and if you don't come +out on my side, openly,--as I know you are in your mind,--buy a wire +mask. I won't have any dodging." + +"Come early. There is a secret to tell," laughed Mr. Bailey as he +withdrew, and then he blushed furiously. "Mother's secret," he added, as +he closed the door behind him. + +The evening of the dinner the Wagners were later than they had intended +to be, and Mrs. Bailey took Nora aside and said quite abruptly: + +"I've got to pop it at you rather suddenly. Why didn't you come earlier? +The lady whom Ned is to marry is here, and it is for her I have given +the dinner. Ned went to your house to tell you last week, but his heart +failed him. He said you were all in such a gale of nonsense that he +concluded to wait. It is a very tender subject with him, I assure you. +His case is quite hopeless. He is madly in love, and I am very much +pleased with his choice. She seems as nearly perfect as they ever are, +and she is unusually talented. But here is Ned now. I have told her all +about it, my son, come and be congratulated." + +He came forward shyly enough for a man of his years and experience, and +took Nora's hand in a helpless way. But Cuthbert relieved matters at +once by a hearty "Well, it is splendid, old fellow. I'm delighted. I--" + +"But before the others come down," broke in Mr. Bailey, as if to get +away from the subject, "I want to get my discharge papers in that case +you plead before me last week. It lies heavy on my soul, for I am very +sorry to say, Mrs. Wagner, that I am compelled to give judgment against +you and your client. I think she was--I'm with Cuthbert this time. She +impresses me as almost without redeeming qualities. I do not wish to +make her acquaintance. I am sure that I could never force myself to take +even a passing interest in that sort of a moral acrobat. Really, the +lovely but selfish Julia would be my choice in a team of vicious little +pacers like that. I'm sure I should detect your friend's fatal weakness +in her every action. I should be unable to see anything but the hideous +green-eyed monster even in the folds of her lace gowns or the coils of +her shining hair. He would appear to me, ghost-like, peering over her +shoulder in the midst of her most fascinating conversation. I should +feel his fangs and see the glitter of his wicked eyes while I tried to +say small nothings to her, and--" + +"Oh, not at all," protested Nora. "You would never detect it at all +unless she happened to be fighting for your esteem or admiration where +she felt that odds were against her. She--" + +"I beg your pardon, Mrs. Wagner, but I am quite sure that I should. +Envy is to me the very worst trait in the human character. I could more +easily excuse or be blinded to anything else. I _know_ that I should +detect it at once. I always do--especially in a woman." + +"Certainly. Anybody could. You know very well, Nora, that I saw--" began +Cuthbert quite gleefully; but as a salve to her wounded feelings Mr. +Bailey added in a tone of conciliation to Nora: + +"However, I shall agree to let you test me some day. Present your friend +to me, _incog._, and I'll wager--oh, _anything_ that I shall read her +like a book on sight. I'm a splendid judge of a woman. Always was from +childhood. I'm sure that I should feel creepy the moment I saw the +brilliant but envious granddaughter of the unfortunate old warrior. And +by the way, _he_ continues to be the one for whom you have enlisted my +sympathy. I wonder that he was able to live two weeks in the same house +with such a--" + +"Cat," said Cuthbert, with a vicious jab at a paper-weight which +represented a solemn-looking Chinese god in brocade trousers. He was +just turning to enter into a cheerful and elaborate statement of his +side of the controversy, as Mrs. Bailey swept down the room with her +son's betrothed upon her arm, smiling and happy. + +"Margaret Mintern!" exclaimed Nora, in dismay, and then-- + +"I am so glad to see you again, dear, and to be able to congratulate +you, instead of some fair unknown, upon the fact that you are to have so +dear a friend of ours for a husband. We think everything of Mr. Bailey. +He is Bert's best friend and--" + +Cuthbert had turned half away in utter confusion when he saw the ladies +coming down the room, and feigned an absorption in the rotund Chinese +deity which he had never displayed for the one of his own nation. But he +bowed now, and mumbled some inarticulate sounds as he looked, not at +the future Mrs. Bailey, but at the ridiculously happy face of her lover, +whose usually ready tongue was silent as he hung upon the lightest tone +of the brilliant woman beside him. As they passed into the dining-room, +Nora managed to say to her husband: + +"Thank heaven we did not mention her name to him, and he evidently does +not suspect. Pull yourself together and stumble through your part the +best you can, dear, without attracting his attention. And then you know +that he and you agree perfectly about the--cat," she added wickedly, and +then she smiled quietly as she took her seat next to the blissful lover +and the relentless judge of the school friend of her youth. + + + + +THE LADY OF THE CLUB. + + "Poor naked wretches, wheresoe'er you are, + That bide the pelting of this pitiless storm, + How shall your houseless heads, and unfed sides, + Your loop'd, and window'd raggedness, defend you + From seasons such as these? O, I have ta'en + Too little care of this! Take physic, pomp; + Expose thyself to feel what wretches feel; + That thou may'st shake the super flux to them, + Show the heavens more just." + + Shakespeare. + + + + +I. + +The old and somewhat cynical saying, that philosophers and reformers can +bear the griefs and woes of other people with a heroism and resignation +worthy of their creeds, would have fitted the case of Roland Barker only +when shorn of the intentional sting of sarcasm. It is, nevertheless, +true that even his nobly-gifted nature, his tender heart, and his alert +brain sometimes failed to grasp the very pith and point of his own +arguments. + +He was a wealthy man whose sympathies were earnestly with the poor and +unfortunate. He believed that he understood their sufferings, their +ambitions, and their needs; and his voice and pen were no more truly on +the side of charity and brotherly kindness than was his purse. + +It was no unusual thing for him to attend a meeting, address a club, or +take part in a memorial service, where his was the only hand unused to +toil, and where he alone bore all expense, and then--after dressing +himself in the most approved and faultless manner--become the guest +of honor at some fashionable entertainment. Indeed, he was a leader in +fashion as well as in philosophy, and at once a hero in Avenue A and on +Murray Hill. + +On the evening of which I am about to tell you he had addressed a +club of workingmen in their little dingy hall, taking as his subject +"Realities of Life." He had sought to show them that poverty and toil +are not, after all, the worst that can befall a man, and that the most +acute misery dwells in palaces and is robed in purple. + +He spoke with the feeling of one who had himself suffered--as, indeed, +he had--from the unsympathetic associations of an uncongenial marriage. +He portrayed, with deep feeling, the chill atmosphere of a loveless +home, whose wealth and glitter and lustre could never thrill and +enrapture the heart as might the loving hand-clasp in the bare, chill +rooms where sympathy and affection were the companions of poverty. + +I had admired his enthusiasm as he pictured the joy of sacrifice for the +sake of those we love, and I had been deeply touched by his +pathos--a pathos which I knew, alas, too well, sprang from a hungry +heart--whether, as now, it beat beneath a simple coat of tweed or, as +when hours later, it would still be the prisoner of its mighty longing, +though clothed with elegance and seated at a banquet fit for princes. + +The last words fell slowly from his lips, and his eyes were dimmed, as +were the eyes of all about me. His voice, so full of feeling, had hardly +ceased to throb when, far back in the little hall, arose a woman, +thin and worn, and plainly clad, but showing traces of a beauty and +refinement which had held their own and fought their way inch by inch +in spite of poverty, anxiety, and tears. The chairman recognized her and +asked her to the platform. + +"No," she said, in a low, tremulous tone which showed at once her +feeling and her culture--"no, I do not wish to take the platform; but +since you ask for criticism of the kind speech we have just listened to, +it has seemed to me that I might offer one, although I am a stranger to +you all." + +Her voice trembled, and she held firmly to the back of a chair in front +of her. The chairman signified his willingness to extend to her the +privilege of the floor, and there was slight applause. She bowed and +began again slowly: + +"I sometimes think that it is useless to ever try to make the suffering +rich and the suffering poor understand each other. I do not question +that the gentleman has tasted sorrow. All good men have. I do not +question that his heart is warm and true and honest, and that he truly +thinks what he has said; but"--and here her voice broke a little and her +lip trembled--"but he does not know what real suffering is. He cannot. +No rich man can." There was a movement of impatience in the room, and +some one said, loud enough to be heard, "If she thinks money can bring +happiness she is badly left." + +There was a slight ripple of laughter at this, and even the serious face +of Roland Barker grew almost merry for a moment. Then the woman went on, +without appearing to have noticed the interruption: + +"I do not want to seem ungracious, and heaven knows, no one could mean +more kindly what I say; but he has said that money is not needed to make +us happy--only love; and again he quotes that baseless old maxim, 'The +love of money is the root of all evil.'" She paused, then went slowly on +as if feeling her way and fearing to lose her hold upon herself: "I know +it is a sad and cruel world even to the more fortunate, if they have +hearts to feel and brains to think. To the unloving or unloved there +must be little worth; but they at least are spared the agony that sits +where love and poverty have shaken hands with death"--her voice broke, +and there was a painful silence in the room--"where those who love are +wrung and torn by all the thousand fears and apprehensions of ills that +are to come to wife and child and friend. The day has passed when all +this talk of poverty and love--that love makes want an easy thing to +bear--the day has passed, I say, when sane men ought to think, or wise +men speak, such cruel, false, and harmful words. He truly says that +money without love cannot bring happiness; but that is only half the +truth, for love with poverty can bring, does bring, the keenest agony +that mortals ever bore." + +There was a movement of dissent in the hall. She lifted her face a +moment, contracted her lips, drew a long breath, and said: + +"I will explain. Without the love, poverty were light enough to bear. +What does it matter for one's self? It is the love that gives the awful +sting to want, and makes its cruel fingers grip the throat as never vise +or grappling-hook took hold, and torture with a keener zest than fiends +their victims! Love and Poverty! _It is the combination that devils +invented to make a hell on earth._" + +All eyes were fastened on her white face now, and she was rushing on, +her words, hot and impassioned, striking firm on every point she made. + +"Let me give you a case. In a home where comfort is--or wealth--a mother +sits, watching by night and day the awful hand of Death reach nearer, +closer to her precious babe, and nothing that skill or science can +suggest will stay the hand or heal the aching heart; and yet there is +comfort in the thought that all was done that love and wealth and skill +could do, and that it was Nature's way. But take from her the comfort of +that thought. She watches with the same poor, breaking heart, but +with the knowledge, now, to keep her company, that science might, ah! +_could_, push back the end, could even cure her babe if but the means to +pay for skill and change and wholesome food and air were hers. Is that +no added pang? Is poverty no curse to her?--a curse the deeper for +her depth of love? The rich know naught of this. It gives to life its +wildest agony, to love its deepest hurt." + +She paused. There was a slight stir as if some one had thought to offer +applause, and then the silence fell again, and she began anew, with +shining eyes and cheeks aflame. She swayed a little as she spoke and +clutched the chair as for support. Her voice grew hoarse, and trembled, +and she fixed her gaze upon a vacant chair: + +"But let me tell you of another case. A stone's throw from this hall, +where pretty things are said week after week--and kindly meant, I +know--of poverty and love--of the blessedness of these--there is a +living illustration, worth more than all the theories ever spun, to tell +you what 'realities of life' must be where love is great and poverty +holds sway. Picture, with me, the torture and despair of a refined and +cultured woman who watches hour by hour the long months through, and +sees the creeping feet of mental wreck, and physical decay, and knows +the mortal need of care and calm for him who is the whole of life to +her, and for the want of that which others waste and hold as dross he +must work on and on, hastening each day the end _he_ does not see, which +shall deprive him of all of life except the power for ill.... She will +be worse than widowed and alone, for ever by her side sits Want, for +him, tearing at every chord of heart and soul--not for herself--but for +that dearer one, wrecked in the prime of life and left a clod endowed +only with strength for cruel wrong, whose hand would sheath a knife in +her dear heart and laugh with maniac glee at his mad deeds. She saw the +end. She knew long months ago what was to be, if he must toil and strain +his nerve and brain for need of that which goes from knave to knave, and +hoards itself within cathedral walls, where wise men meet to teach +the poor contentment with their lot! She knew _he_ must not know; the +knowledge of the shadow must be kept from _his_ dear brain until the +very end, by smiles, and cheer, and merry jest from her. Who dare tell +_her_ that riches are a curse? and prate of 'dross' and call on heaven +to witness that its loss is only gain of joy and harbinger of higher, +holier things? Who dare call _her_ as witness for the bliss of poverty +with love?" + +She slowly raised her hand and, with a quick-drawn breath, pressed it +against her side, and with her eyes still fastened on the vacant chair, +and tears upon her cheeks, falling unchecked upon her heaving bosom, she +held each listener silent and intent on every word she spoke. The time +allotted anyone was long since overrun; but no one thought of that, and +she went on: + +"'With love!' Ah, there is where the iron can burn and scar and open +every wound afresh each day, make poverty a curse, a blight, a scourge, +a vulture, iron-beaked, with claws of burning steel, that leave no nerve +untouched, no drop of blood unshed. + +"'With love!' 'Tis there the hand of Poverty can deal the deadliest +blows, and show, as nowhere else on earth, the value of that slandered, +hoarded thing called wealth." + +There blazed into her face a fierce, indignant light, her voice swelled +out and struck upon the ear like fire-bells in the dead of night: + +"'The root of evil!'--'poverty with love!' Hypocrisy, in purple velvet +robed, behind stained glass, with strains of music falling on its ears, +with table spread in banquet-hall below, bethought itself to argue thus +to those itself had robbed; while, thoughtless of its meaning and its +birth, the echo of its lying, treacherous words comes from the pallid +lips of many a wretch whose life has been a failure and an agony because +of that which he himself extols. A lie once born contains a thousand +lives, and holds at bay the struggling, feeble truth, if but that lie be +fathered by a priest and mothered by a throne--_as this one was!_ 'The +root of evil' is the spring of joy. Decry it those who will. And those +who do _not_ love, perchance, may laugh at all its need can mean; but +to the loving, suffering poor bring no more cant, and cease to voice the +hollow words of Ignorance and Hypocrisy. It is too cruel, and its deadly +breath has long enough polluted sympathy and frozen up the springs +of healthy thought, while sheathing venomed fangs in breaking hearts. +Recast your heartless creeds! Your theories for the poor are built on +these." + +She sank back into her chair white and exhausted. + +There was a wild burst of applause. A part of the audience, with that +ear for sound and that lack of sense to be found in all such gatherings, +had forgotten that it was not listening to a burst of eloquence which +had been duly written out and committed to memory for the occasion. + +But Roland Barker sprang to his feet, held both his hands up, to command +silence, and said, in a scarcely audible voice, as he trembled from head +to foot: "Hush, hush! She has told the truth! She has told the awful +truth! I never saw it all before. Heaven help you to bear it. It seems +to me I cannot!" + +Several were pale and weeping. I turned to speak to the woman who had +changed an evening's entertainment into a tragic scene; but she had +slipped out during the excitement. I took Barker's arm and we walked +towards the Avenue together. Neither of us spoke until we reached +Madison Square. Here the poor fellow sank into a seat and pulled me down +beside him. + +"Don't talk to me about theories after that," he said. "Great God! I am +more dead than alive. I feel fifty years older than when I went to that +little hall to teach those people how to live by my fine philosophy, +and I truly thought that I had tasted sorrow and found the key to +resignation. Ye gods!" + +"Perhaps you have," I said. + +"Yes, yes," he replied, impatiently; "but suppose I had to face life day +by day, hour by hour, as that woman pictured it--and she was a lady with +as keen a sense of pain as I--what do you suppose my philosophy would do +for me then? Do you think I could endure it? And I went there to teach +those people how to suffer and be strong!" + +"Look here, Barker," I said, "you'd better go home now and go to bed. +You are cold and tired, and this won't help matters any." + +"What will?" he asked. + +I made no reply. When we reached his door he asked again: + +"What will?" + +I shook my head and left him standing in the brilliant hall of his +beautiful home, dazed and puzzled and alone. + + + + +II. + +The next time I met Roland Barker he grasped my hand and said excitedly: +"I have found that woman! What she said is all true. My God! what is +to be done? I feel like a strong man tied hand and foot, while devilish +vultures feed on the flesh of living babes before my eyes!" + +"Stop, Barker," I said; "stop, and go away for a while, or you will go +mad. What have you been doing? Look at your hands; they tremble like the +hands of a palsied man; and your face; why, Barker, your face is haggard +and set, and your hair is actually turning gray! What in the name of all +that's holy have you been doing?" + +"Nothing, absolutely nothing!" he exclaimed "That is the trouble! +What _can_ I do? I tell you something is wrong, Gordon, something is +desperately wrong in this world. Look at that pile of stone over there: +millions of dollars are built into that. It is opened once each week, +aired, cleaned, and put in order for a fashionable audience dressed in +silk and broadcloth. They call it a church, but it is simply a popular +club house, which, unlike other club houses, hasn't the grace to pay +its own taxes. They use that club house, let us say, three hours in all, +each week, for what? To listen to elaborate music and fine-spun theories +about another world. They are asked to, and they give money to send +these same theories to nations far away, who--to put it mildly--are +quite as well off without them. Then that house is closed for a week, +and those who sat there really believe that they have done what is right +by their fellow-men! Their natural consciences, their sense of right +and justice, have been given an anaesthetic. 'The poor ye have with you +always,' they are taught to believe, is not only true, but _right_. I +tell you, Gordon, it is all perfectly damnable, and it seems to me that +I cannot bear it when I remember that woman." + +"She is only one of a great many," I suggested. + +Roland Barker groaned: "My God! that is the trouble--so many that the +thing seems hopeless. And to think that on every one of even these poor +souls is laid another burden that that stone spire may go untaxed!" + +"Barker," I said, laying my hand on his arm, "tell me what has forced +all this upon you with such a terrible weight just now." + +"Not here, not now," he said. "I have written it down just as she told +it to me--you know I learned stenography when I began taking an interest +in public meetings. Well, I've just been copying those notes out. They +are in my pocket," he said, laying his hand on his breast. "They seem to +burn my very soul. I would not dare to trust myself to read them to you +here. Come home with me." + +When we were seated in his magnificent library, he glanced about him, +and with a wave of his hand said, with infinite satire: "You will notice +the striking appropriateness of the surroundings and the subject." + +"No doubt," I said. "I have often noticed that before, especially the +last time I heard a sermon preached to three of the Vanderbilts, +two Astors, five other millionaires, and about sixty more consistent +Christians, all of whom were wealthy. The subject was Christ's advice to +the rich young man, 'Sell all thou hast and give to the poor.' But never +mind; go on; the day has passed when deed and creed are supposed to hold +the slightest relation to each other; and what is a $20,000 salary for +if not to buy sufficient ability to explain it all sweetly away and +administer, at the same time, an anaesthetic to the natural consciences +of men?" + +I settled myself in a large Turkish chair on one side of the splendidly +carved table; he stood on the other side sorting a manuscript. Presently +he began reading it. "'When I married Frank Melville he was strong and +grand and brave; a truer man never lived. He had been educated for the +law. His practice was small, but we were able to live very well on +what he made, and the prospect for the future was bright. We loved each +other--but, ah! there are no words to tell that. We worshipped each +other as only two who have been happily mated can ever understand. We +lived up to his salary. Perhaps you will say that that was not wise. We +thought it was. A good appearance, a fairly good appearance at least, +was all that we could make, and to hold his own in his profession, this +was necessary. You know how that is. A shabby-looking man soon loses his +hold on paying clients. Of course he would not dress well and allow me +to be ill-clad. He--he loved me. We were never able to lay by anything; +but we were young and strong and hopeful--and we loved each other.'" +Barker's voice trembled. He looked at me a moment and then said very +low: "If you could have seen her poor, tired, beautiful eyes when she +said that." + +"I can imagine how she looked," I said. "She had a face one remembers." + +After a little he went on: "We had both been brought up to live well. +Our friends were people of culture, and we--it will sound strange to you +for me to say that our love and devotion were the admiration and talk of +all of them. + +"'By-and-by I was taken ill. My husband could not bear to think of me as +at home alone, suffering He stayed with me a great deal. I did not know +that he was neglecting his business; I think he did not realize it then; +he thought he could make it all up; he was strong and--he loved me. At +last the doctors told him that I should die if he did not take me away; +I ought to have an ocean voyage. It almost killed him that he could not +give me that. We had not the money. He took me away a little while where +I could breathe the salt air, and the good it did me made his heart only +the sadder when he saw that it was true that all I needed was an ocean +voyage. The climate of his home was slowly killing me. We bore it as +long as we dared, and I got so weak that he almost went mad. Then we +moved here, where my health was good. But it was a terrible task to get +business; there were so many others like him, all fighting, as if for +life, for money enough to live on from day to day. The strain was +too much for him, and just as he began to gain a footing he fell ill, +and--and if we had had money enough for him to take a rest then, and +have proper care, good doctors, and be relieved from immediate anxiety, +he would have gotten well, with my care--I loved him so! But as it +was--' Shall I show you the end?" Barker stopped, he was trembling +violently, his eyes were full of tears. I waited. Presently he said, +huskily: "Shall I tell you, Gordon, what I saw? I have not gotten over +it yet. She laid her finger on her lips and motioned me to follow. The +room where we had been was poor and bare. She took a key from her bosom, +opened a door, and went in. I followed. Sitting in the only comfortable +chair--which had been handsome once--was a magnificent-looking man, so +far as mere physical proportions can make one that. + +"'Darling,' she said tenderly, as if talking to a little child. +'Darling, I have brought you a present. Are you glad?' + +"She handed him a withered rose that I had carelessly dropped as I went +in. + +"He arose, bowed to me when she presented me, waved me to his chair, +took the flower, looked at her with infinite love, and said: 'To-morrow, +little wife; wait till to-morrow.' + +"Then he sat down, evidently unconscious of my presence, and gazed +steadily at her for a moment, seeming to forget all else and to struggle +with some thought that constantly eluded him. She patted his hand as if +he were a child, smiling through her heart-break all the while, kissed +him, and motioned me to precede her from the room. + +"When she came out she locked the door carefully behind her, sank into a +chair, covered her face with her hands, and sobbed as if her heart would +break. After a while she said: 'A little money would have saved, him and +now it is too late, too late. Sometimes he is violent, sometimes like +that. The doctors say the end is not far off, and that any moment he +may kill me, and afterwards awake to know it! It is all the result of +poverty _with love!'_ she said. Then, passionately: 'If I did not love +him so I could bear it, but _I cannot, I cannot!_ And how will _he_ bear +it if he ever harms me--and I not there to help him?'" + +Barker stepped to the window to hide his emotion. Presently he said, in +a voice that trembled: "If she did not love him so she could let him +go to some--asylum; but she knows the end is sure, and not far off, +and that the gleams of light he has are when he sees her face. She has +parted with everything that made life attractive to keep food and warmth +for him. She is simply existing now from day to day--one constant agony +of soul and sense--waiting for the end. She allowed me to take a doctor +to see him; I would have come for you, but you were out of town. He only +confirmed what others had told her a year ago. He advised her to have +him put in a safe place before he did some violence; but she refused, +and made us promise not to interfere. She said he would be able to harm +no one but her, if he became violent at the last, and she was ready for +that. It was easier far to live that way and wait for that each day +than to have him taken away where he would be unhappy and perhaps +ill-treated. He needed her care and love beside him every hour, and she +--she needed nothing." + +Here Barker flung himself into a chair and let his head fall on his +folded arms on the table. + +"That is the way love makes poverty easy to bear," he said, bitterly, +after a time, and his trembling hands clinched tight together. + +"Did you give her any money?" I asked. + +He groaned. "Yes, yes, I--that is, I left some on the table under her +sewing. She isn't the kind of woman one can offer charity. She--" + +"No," I said, "she isn't, and beside, for the pain that tortures her it +is too late now for money to help. Only it may relieve her somewhat to +feel sure that she can get what he needs to eat and wear and to keep him +warm and allow her to be free from the necessity of outside work. I am +glad you left the money. But--but--Barker, do you think she will use it, +coming that way and from a stranger?" + +He looked up forlornly. "No, I don't," he said; "and yet she may. I will +hope so; but if she does, what then? The terrible question will still +remain just where it was. That is no way to solve it; we can't bail out +the ocean with a thimble. And what an infamous imposition all this talk +is of 'resignation' to such as she; for her terrible calm, as she talked +to me, had no hint of resignation in it. She is simply, calmly, quietly +desperate now--and she is one of many." He groaned aloud. + +"Will you take me there the next time you go?" I asked. + +"She said I must not come back; she could not be an object of +curiosity--nor allow him to be. She said that she allowed me to come +this time because on the night we first saw her she had stepped into +that little hall to keep herself from freezing in her thin clothes as +she was making her way home, and she saw that I was earnest in what I +said, and she stayed to listen--" his voice broke again. + +Just then the drapery was drawn back, and his wife, superbly robed, +swept in, bringing a bevy of girls. + +"Oh, Mr. Barker," said one, gayly, "you don't know what you missed +to-night by deserting our theatre party; it was all so real--love in +rags, you know, and all that sort of thing; only I really don't like to +see _quite_ so much attention paid to the 'Suffering poor,' with a big +S, and the lower classes generally. I think the stage can do far better +than that, don't you? But it is the new fad, I suppose, and after all I +fancy it doesn't do much harm, only as it makes that sort of people more +insufferably obtrusive about putting their ill-clad, bad-smelling woes +before the rest of us. What a beautiful vase this is, Mrs. Barker! May I +take it to the light?" + +"Certainly, my dear," laughed Mrs. Barker; "and I agree with you, as +usual. I think it is an exquisite vase--and that the stage is becoming +demoralized. It is pandering to the low taste for representations of +low life. I confess I don't like it. That sort of people do not have the +feelings to be hurt--the fine sensibilities and emotions attributed to +them. Those grow up in refined and delicate surroundings. That is what I +often tell Roland when he insists upon making himself unhappy over some +new 'case' of destitution. I tell him to send them five dollars by mail +and not to worry himself, and I won't allow him to worry me with his +Christie-street emotions." + +Barker winced, and I excused myself and withdrew, speculating on certain +phases of delicacy of feeling and fine sensibility. + + + + +III. + +I did not see Barker again for nearly three weeks, when one night my +bell was rung with unusual violence, and I heard an excited voice in my +hall. "Be quick, John; hurry," it said, "and tell the doctor I must see +him at once. Tell him it is Roland Barker." + +John had evidently demurred at calling me at so late an hour. + +"All right, Barker; I'll be down in a moment," I called from above. "No, +come up. You can tell me what is the matter while I dress. Is it for +yourself? There, go in that side room, I can hear you, and I'll be +dressed in a moment." + +"Hurry, hurry," he said, excitedly, "I'll tell you on the way. I have my +carriage. Don't wait to order yours, only hurry, hurry, hurry." + +Once in the carriage, I said: "Barker, you are going to use yourself up, +this way. You can't keep this sort of thing up much longer. You'd better +go abroad." + +"Drive faster," he called, to the man on top. Then to me, "If you are +not the first doctor there? there will be a dreadful scene. They will +most likely arrest her for murder." + +"Whom?" said I. "You have told me nothing, and how can I prevent that if +a murder has been committed?" + +"By giving her a regular death certificate," said he, coolly, "saying +that you attended the case, and that it was a natural death. I depend +upon you, Gordon; it would be simply infamous to make her suffer any +more. I cannot help her now, but you can, you _must_. No one will know +the truth but us, and afterwards we can help her--to forget. She is not +an old woman; there may be something in life for her yet." + +"Is it the Lady of the Club?" I asked. We had always called her that +"What has she done?" + +"Yes," he said, "it is the 'Lady of the Club.' and she has poisoned her +husband." + +"Good God!" exclaimed I; "and you want me to give her a regular death +certificate and say I attended the case?" + +"You must," he said; "it would be infamous not to. She could not bear it +any longer. She found herself breaking down, and she would not leave him +alive without her care and love. He had become almost helpless, except +when short violent spells came on. These left him exhausted. He almost +killed her in the last one. Her terror was that he would do so and +then regain his reason--that he would know it afterwards and perhaps be +dragged through the courts. She had been working in a chemist's office, +it seems, when she was able to do anything. She took some aconitine, and +to-night she put everything in perfect order, gave him the best supper +she could, got him to bed, and then--gave him that. She sent for me and +told me as calmly as--God! it was the calm of absolute desperation. +She sat there when I went in, holding his poor dead hand and kissing it +reverently. She laid it down and told me what I tell you. There was +not a tear, a moan, a sigh. She said: 'Here is the money you left--all +except what I paid for his supper to-night. We had gotten down to that +before I had the chance to steal the poison or the courage to give it to +him. I had not meant to use any of the money; the rest is here. I would +like it used--if you are willing--to bury him decently, not in the +Potter's Field, and I would like--if you will take the trouble--to have +it done absolutely privately. We have borne enough. I cannot bear for +even his ashes to be subjected to any further humiliation.'" + +Roland Barker paused to command himself. "Of course I promised her," he +went on, after a time. "She does not realize that she may be arrested +and have his poor body desecrated to find the cause of death. That would +make her insane--even if-- Drive faster!" he called out again to the +man outside. When we reached the house he said: "Be prepared to see her +perfectly calm. It is frightful to witness, and I tremble for the result +later on." + +When we knocked on her door there was no response. I pushed it open and +entered first. The room was empty. We went to the inner doer and rapped +gently, then louder. There was no sound. Barker opened the door, and +then stepped quickly back and closed it. "She is kneeling there by his +bed," he said; "write the certificate here and give it to me. Then I +will bring an undertaker and--he and I can attend to everything else. I +did want you to see her. I think you should give her something to make +her sleep. That forced calm will make her lose her mind. She is so +shattered you would not recognize her." + +"Stay here, Barker," I said; "I want to see her alone for a moment. I +will tell her who I am and that you brought me--if I need to." + +He eyed me sharply, but I stepped hastily into the inner room. I touched +the shoulder and then the forehead of the kneeling form. It did not +move. "Just as I expected," I muttered, and lifting the lifeless body +in my arms I laid it gently beside her husband. In one hand she held +the vial from which she had taken the last drop of the deadly drug, and +clasped in the other her husband's fingers. She had been dead but a few +moments, and both she and her husband were robed for the grave. + +When I returned to the outer room I found Barker with a note in his +hand, and a shocked and horrified look on his face. He glanced up at me +through his tears. + +"We were too late," he said. "She left this note for me. I found it here +on the table. She meant to do it all along, and that is why she was so +calm and had no fears for herself." + +"I thought so when you told me what she had done," said I. + +"Did you? I did not for a moment, or I would have stayed and tried to +reason her out of it." + +"It is best as it is," said I, "and you could not have reasoned her out +of it. It was inevitable--after the rest. Take this certificate too; you +will need both." + +When all was safely over, as we drove home from the new graves two days +later, Barker said: "Is this the solution?" + +I did not reply. + +Presently he said: "To the dead, who cannot suffer, we can be kind and +shield them even from themselves. Is there no way to help the living? A +few hundred dollars, two short years ago, would have saved all this, and +there was no way for her to get it. She knew it _all_ then, and there +was no help!" + +"Why did she not, in such a case as that, push back her pride and go +to some one? There must be thousands who would have gladly responded to +such a call as that," I argued. + +He buried his face in his hands for a moment and shuddered. At last +he said: "She did--she went to three good men, men who had known, been +friendly with, admired her and her husband. Two of them are worth their +millions, the other one is rich. She only asked to borrow, and promised +to repay it herself if she had to live and work after he were dead to do +it!" + +He paused. + +"You do not mean to tell me that they refused--and they old friends and +rich?" I asked, amazed. + +"I mean to say just this: they one and all made some excuse; they did +not let her have it." + +"She told them what the doctors said, and of her fears?" + +"She did," he answered, sadly. + +"And yet you say they are good men!" I exclaimed, indignantly. + +"Good, benevolent, charitable, every one of them," he answered. + +"Were you one of them, Barker?" I asked, after a moment's pause. + +"Thank God, no!" he replied. "But perhaps in some other case I have done +the same, if I only knew the whole story. Those men do not know this +last, you must remember." + +"And the worst of it is, we dare not tell them," said I, as we parted. + +"No, we dare not," he replied, and left me standing with the copy of the +burial certificate in my hand. + +"Natural causes?" I said to myself, looking at it. "Died of natural +causes--the brutality and selfishness of man--and poverty with love. +_Natural_ causes! Yes." And I closed my office door and turned out the +light. + + + + +UNDER PROTEST. + +_"This is my story, sir; a trifle, indeed, I assure you._ + +_"Much more, perchance, might be said; but I hold him, of all men, most +lightly Who swerves from the truth in his tale."_ + +Bret Harte. + + +When the new family moved into, and we were told had bought, the cottage +nearest our own, we were naturally interested in finding out what kind +of people they were, and whether we had gained or lost by the change of +neighbors. + +In a summer place like this it makes a good deal of difference just what +kind of people live so near to you that when you are sitting on your +veranda and they are swinging in hammocks on theirs, the most of the +conversation is common property, unless you whisper, and one does not +want to spend three or four months of each year mentally and verbally +tiptoeing about one's own premises. Then, on the other hand, there +are few less agreeable situations to be placed in than to be forced to +listen to confidences or quarrels with which you have nothing whatever +to do, or else be deprived of the comforts and pleasures of out-door +life, to secure which you endure so many other annoyances. + +Our new neighbors were, therefore, as you will admit, of the utmost +interest and importance to us, and I was naturally very much pleased, at +the end of the first week, when I returned one day from a fishing party, +from which my wife's headache had detained her, by the report she gave +me of their attitude toward each other. (From her glowing estimate, I +drew rose-colored pictures of their probable kindliness and generosity +toward others.) Up to this time they had been but seldom outside of +their house, and we had not gathered much information of their doings, +except the fact that a good deal of nice furniture had come, and they +appeared to be greatly taken up in beautifying and arranging their +cottage. This much promised well, so far as it went; but we had not +lived to our time of life not to find out, long ago, that the most +exquisitely appointed houses sometimes lack the one essential feature; +that is, ladies and gentlemen to occupy them. + +"They are lovely!" said my wife, the moment I entered the door, before +I had been able to deposit my fishing-tackle and ask after her headache. +"They are lovely; at least he is," she amended. "I am sure we shall +be pleased with them; or, at least, with him. A man as careful of, and +attentive to, his wife as he is can't help being an agreeable neighbor." + +"Good!" said I. "How did you find out? And how is your headache?--Had +a disgusting time fishing. Glad you did not go. Sun was hot; breeze +was hot; boatman's temper was a hundred and twenty in the shade; bait +wouldn't stay on the hooks, and there weren't any fish any way. But how +did you say your head is?" + +"My head?" said my wife, with that retrospective tone women have, which +seemed to indicate that if she had ever had a head, and if her head had +ever ached, and if headache was a matter of sufficient importance to +remember, in all human probability it had recovered in due time. "My +head? Oh, yes--Oh, it is all right; but you really never did see any one +so tractable as that man. And adaptable! Why, it is a perfect wonder. Of +course I had no business to look or listen; but I did. I just couldn't +help it. The fact is, I thought they were quarrelling at first, and I +almost fainted. I said to myself, 'If they are that kind of people +we will sell out. I will not live under the constant drippings of +ill-temper.' Quarrelling ought to be a penitentiary offence; that is, +I mean the bickerings and naggings most people dignify by that name. I +could endure a good, square, stand-up and knock down quarrel, that had +some character to it; but the eternal differences, often expressed by +the tones of voice only, I can't stand." I smiled an emphatic assent, +and my wife went on. + +"Well, I must confess his tones of voice are, at times, against him; but +I'm not sure that it is not due to the distance. _All_ of his tones may +not carry this far. I'm sure they don't, for when I first heard him, +and made up my mind that it was a horrid, common, plebeian little row, +I went to the west bedroom window--you know it looks directly into their +kitchen--and what do you suppose I saw?" + +The question was so sudden and wholly unexpected, and my mental +apparatus was so taken up with the story that I found myself with no +ideas whatever on the subject Indeed I do not believe that my wife +wanted me to guess what she saw, half so much as she wanted breath; but +I gave the only reply which the circumstances appeared to admit of, and +which, I was pleased to see, in spite of its seeming inadequacy, was +as perfectly satisfactory to the blessed little woman as if it had been +made to order and proven a perfect fit. + +"I can't imagine," said I. + +"Of course you can't," she replied, pushing my crossed legs into +position, and seating herself on my knees. + +"Of course you can't. A man couldn't. Well, it seems their servant left +last night, and that blessed man was washing the dishes this morning. +The difference of opinion had been over which one of them should do it." + +"Why, the confounded brute!" said I. "He is a good deal better able to +do it than she is. She looks sick, and so long as he has no business +to attend to down here, he has as much time as she and a good deal more +strength to do that kind of work." + +"Well, I just knew you'd look at it that way," said my wife, with an +inflection of pride and admiration which indicated that I had made a +ten strike of some kind, of which few men--and not many women--would be +capable. + +"But that was not it at all," continued she. + +I began laboriously to readjust my mental moorings to this seemingly +complicated situation, and was on the verge of wondering why my wife was +so pleased with me for simply making a mistake, when she began again, +after giving me a little pat of unqualified satisfaction and sympathy. + +"They both wanted to do it. She said she wasn't a bit tired and could do +it alone just as well as not, and he'd break the glasses with his funny, +great, big fingers; and he said he'd be careful not to break anything, +and that the dish-water would spoil her hands." + +"Good," said I, "I shall like the fellow. I------" + +"Of course you will," my wife broke in, enthusiastically; "but that +isn't all. I went to sleep after that, and later on was awakened by a +loud--and as I thought at the time--a very angry voice. I went to +the window again only to see a laughing scuffle between them over the +potato-knife. She wanted to scrape them and he wanted to scrape them. Of +course he got the knife, and it really did look too comical to see him +work with those little bulbs. He put his whole mind on them, and he +didn't catch her picking over the berries until she was nearly done. +Then he scolded again. He said he did the potatoes to keep her from +getting her thumb and forefinger black, and here she was with her whole +hand covered with berry stain. He seemed really vexed, and I must say +his voice doesn't carry this far as if he was half as nice as he is. +I think there ought to be a chair of voices attached to every +school-house--so to speak--and the result of the training made one of +the tests of admission to the colleges of the country. Don't you?" + +Again I was wholly unprepared for her sudden question, and was only +slowly clambering around the idea she had suggested, so I said--somewhat +irrelevantly, no doubt--"It may be." + +She looked at me for a moment without speaking, and then said, as she +got up and crossed the room: "You didn't hear a word I said, and you +don't begin to appreciate that man anyway." + +"I did hear you, dear," I protested; "I was listening as hard as I +could--and awfully interested--but a fellow can't skip along at that +rate and have well-matured views on tap without a moment's warning. +You've got to be like the noble ladies in the 'Lay of the Last +Minstrel,' 'and give me heart and give me time.' Now _they_ understood +men. We're slow." + +She laughed and tied the last pink bow in the lace of a coquettish +little white gown and dragged me out on the veranda. + +Our new neighbors were out ahead of us. + +"I don't think so at all, Margaret," we heard him say, as we took our +chairs near the edge of the porch to catch any stray breeze that might +be wandering our way. + +"Sh--," we heard her say; "don't talk so loud. They will think you are +going to scalp me." + +"Oh, don't bother about the neighbors; let 'em hear," said he, "let 'em +think. Who cares? If they haven't got anything better to do than sit +around and think, they'd better move away from our neighborhood." + +"Sh--said she again, looking at him with a good deal of emphasis in her +eyes. + +"Well, it is too bad, isn't it?" acquiesced he, in a much lower voice, +and one from which every vestige of the tone of protest had vanished. + +"It _is_ too bad that these summer cottages are built so close together +that you can't tie your shoes without being overheard by the folks next +door? It makes me nervous. I feel as if I had to sit up straight all +the time and smile like a crocodile, or else run the risk of being +misunderstood." + +"It _is_ trying, dear," she said, "and destroys a good deal of the +comfort and ease of one's outing." + +"Nothing of the kind," began he, so explosively as to make my wife jump. + +"Sh--," whispered the lady next door, but he went on. + +"Nothing of the kind. I don't let it bother me in the least. They can +attend to their own affairs, and I----" + +"Sh--," said his wife; "suppose we walk down to the beach." She began to +adjust her wrap. + +"It is a good deal more comfortable here," he protested, "and besides +I'm tired." + +"So you are, of course," she said, regretfully. "I forgot. Such unusual +work for a man would tire him;" and she loosened the lace veil she had +drawn over her head and reseated herself. + +"Well, are you ready?" questioned he, clapping on his hat and suddenly +starting down the steps. + +"Ready for what?" asked she, in surprise. + +"The deuce, Margaret. I thought you said that you were going to the +beach!" + +She got up, readjusted her veil, took her wrap on her arm, and ran +lightly after him. + +"I wonder if I shall need this wrap?" she said as she passed our gate. + +"Heavens! no," he replied, "and it will heat you all up to carry it. +Here, give it to me. I don't see what on earth you brought it for. I'm +certainly hot enough without loading me up with this." + +"I will carry it," she said, cheerfully; "I don't feel the heat on my +arm as you do--or I'll run back and leave it on the porch. You walk +slowly. I can easily catch up." + +She started; but he took the shawl from her, threw it lightly over his +shoulder, and, pulling her hand through his arm, said gayly, and in the +most compliant tone: "It isn't very warm. I won't notice this little +thing and, besides, you'll need it down there, as like as not." + +When they were out of hearing my wife drew a long breath and said: "I +wonder if we ever sound like that to other people?--and yet, they seem +to be devoted to each other," she added hastily. + +"They are, no doubt," said I, "only he appears to be a chronic kicker." + +"A comic what?" said my wife, in so loud a tone that I involuntarily +exclaimed "Sh--!" + +We both laughed. Then she said: "But really, dear, I didn't understand +what you said he was. There doesn't seem to me to be anything comic +about him, though. And----" + +"Comic! Well, I should think not," said I. "I should think it would be +anything but comic to that little woman to go through that sort of thing +every time she opened her mouth. What I said was that he seems to be +a chronic kicker, and I might add--with some show of fairness--that he +impresses me as the champion of Kicktown at that." + +"Sh--," laughed my wife, "they're coming back." + +"I don't agree with you at all. There is no need to do anything of the +kind," were the first words we heard from a somewhat distant couple, and +my wife concluded that our new neighbors were not very far off. "It +would be no end of trouble for you. You'd get all tired out; and +besides, what do we owe to the Joneses that makes it necessary for you +to disturb all our little comforts to ask them down here?" he continued. +We could not hear her reply; but his protest and evident deep +dissatisfaction with the whole scheme went bravely on. + +She passed into the house and left him on the steps. When she came out +a few moments later he said, sweetly: "As I was just saying, it will be +quite a diversion for you to see the girls, and I'd enjoy the old man +hugely. He's a jolly old coon; and then we owe it to them after all they +did for you." + +"What girls? What old man is a jolly coon?" asked she, in an utterly +bewildered tone. + +"Margaret! The Joneses, of course. Whom have we been talking about for +the last half-hour?" exploded he. + +"Oh," said she, having evidently quite given over asking the Joneses, +and become occupied with other thoughts, "I thought the idea did not +please you. But I'm so glad. It will do you good to have him here, and I +shall be delighted." + +"Do me good!" exploded he. "Do me good! Tiresome old bore, if there ever +was one. Women are queer fish to deal with, but I'm sure I don't care +whom you invite here." + +Our neighbors withdrew for the night and we sighed with relief. About +two o'clock my wife touched me to find if I was asleep. The movement +was so stealthy that I inferred at once that there were burglars in the +house. I was wide awake in an instant. + +"What is it?" I whispered. + +"Well, I'm glad you're awake. I want to know what that was you called +the man next door. I forgot what it was, and I couldn't sleep for trying +to remember." + +I laughed. "I believe I said that he impressed me as one so addicted +to the reprehensible habit of protest--on general principles, as +it were--that it had now become the normal condition of his mental +constitution." + +"You didn't say any such thing," said she. "You--" + +"I believe that at the time of which you speak I allowed myself to be +guilty of a habit you do not wholly admire; but I really had no idea it +would keep you awake. I used slang. I said that he was a chronic kicker, +and--" + +"That's it! That's it!" exclaimed she, with deep satisfaction. "He's a +'chronic kicker.' Well, if you'll believe me, he hasn't stopped kicking +long enough to say his prayers decently since we went to bed. First +about what time it was; then about which room they'd sleep in; then +there was too much cover; then the windows were wrong; then--oh, +heavens!--I wonder if he kicks in his sleep? He always comes around to +reason in time; but if there was ever anything more maddening to meet +than that constant wall of protest--for the sake of protest--I don't +know what it could be." + +"Nor--I," said I, half asleep. + +Presently her hand grasped mine vigorously, and I sprang up startled, +for I had been sound asleep again. "What's the matter?" I said, in a +loud tone. + +"Sh--," whispered my wife. "Don't speak in that tone. I'd rather people +would think you stayed out nights, than to suppose you stayed at home +and nagged me. He's at it again. I'd most gone to sleep and his voice +nearly scared the life out of me. She wanted to close the window. He +objected, of course; said he'd smother--sh--" + +Just then we heard our neighbor's wife ask sleepily: "What are you +doing, dear?" + +"Closing this detestable window. Lets in too much salt air. 'Fraid +you'll get chilled. I am. Where's another blanket?" + +The window went down with a bang, and we heard no more of our neighbors +that night. But the next morning the same thing began again, and I do +not believe that during that entire summer he ever agreed with his wife +the first time she spoke, nor failed to come around to her view after he +took time to think it over. I remember when I was introduced to him, +a week later, his wife said: "This is our nearest neighbor, you know, +Thomas, and--" + +"No, he isn't, Margaret; the people back of us are nearer," he said. +Then to me: "Pleased to meet you. I believe our wives have become quite +good friends. I'm very glad for Margaret's sake, too. It's dull for her +with only an old fellow like me to entertain her, and she not very well. +And then, as she says, you are our nearest neighbor, and we really ought +not to be too ceremonious at such a place as this." + +"I thought, Thomas," suggested his wife, "that you said one could not +be too particular. Why, you quite blustered when I first told you I had +made advances to some of the other--" + +"Nonsense! I did nothing of the kind," broke in he. "What on earth ever +put such an idea into your head, Margaret? You know I always say that +without pleasant neighbors, and friendly relations with them, a summer +cottage is no place for a white man to live." + +My wife hastened to change the subject. Nothing on earth is more +distasteful to her than a family contest, of even a very mild type, +especially when the tones of voice seem to express more of indignation +and a desire to override, than a mere difference of opinion. She thought +the surf a safe subject. + +"Was not the water lovely to-day? You were in, I suppose?" she inquired +of our neighbor's wife. + +"Yes, we were in," she began, enthusiastically. "It was perfect and--" + +"I don't know what you call perfect," broke in he, "I called it beastly. +It was so cold I felt like a frog when I got out, and you looked half +frozen. The fact is, this is too far north to bathe for pleasure in the +surf. It may be good for one's health, but it is anything but pleasant. +Now at Old Point Comfort it is different. I like it there." + +"Why, James," said his wife, "I thought you preferred this because of +the more bracing and exhilarating effect." + +After a little more objection, which he seemed to think firmly +established his independence, he ended his remarks thus: + +"Of course, as you say, it is more bracing. Yes, that's a fact, +Margaret. I couldn't help noticing when I came out this morning that I +felt like a new man, and you--why, 'pon my word, you looked as bright +and rosy as a girl of sixteen. Oh, the surf here is great. It really is. +I like it; don't you?" + +This last he had addressed to me. I was so occupied in a study of, and +so astonished by, the facility with which he took his mental flops, +after enjoying his little "kick," that I was taken off my feet by his +sudden appeal to me, and was quite at a loss for a reply which would do +justice to the occasion, and at the same time put a stop to the contest +between husband and wife. + +But, as usual, my wife hastened to my rescue and covered my confusion by +her gay little laugh and explanation. + +"Ha, ha, ha," she laughed, "you have caught my husband napping already. +I know exactly where he was. He was lumbering along through an elaborate +speculation on, and a comparison of, the relative merits of--" here +she began telling them off on her fingers to the great amusement of our +neighbors--"first, fresh and salt water bathing; second, the method, +time, place, and condition of each as affected by the moon, stars, +and Gulf Stream. He was, most likely, climbing over Norway with +a thermometer, or poking a test-tube of some kind into the +semi-liquefaction which passes itself off as water to those unfortunates +who are stranded along the shores of the Mississippi. Just wait; one of +these days he will get down to our discussion and he'll agree with us +when he gets there. But don't hurry him." + +We all joined in the laugh at my expense; and I remarked that I had +served so long as a target for my wife's fun that even if I could skip +around, mentally, at as lively a rate as she seemed to expect, I would +pretend that I couldn't, in order not to deprive her of her chief source +of amusement. At this point our neighbor's new cook came to the edge +of their porch and asked her mistress if she might speak to her for a +moment. She arose to go. + +"Oh, thunder, Margaret, I hope you don't intend to allow that worthless +girl to call you home every time you go any place. Tell her to wait. It +can't be much she wants," said our neighbor. + +"Jane," said his wife sweetly, reseating herself, "you can wait until I +come home. It won't be long." + +"I wonder if you'd better do that, Margaret," said he, just as our wives +had begun to discuss something relative to housekeeping. "Jane is a +good girl, and she wouldn't call you if it were not something important, +Don't you think we had better go at once?" + +"I did think so," said she, and bidding us goodnight our neighbors +crossed the lawn and re-entered their own door and closed it for the +night. + +After a long pause my wife said, in a stage whisper: "I suppose it is +his way of showing that he is 'boss,' as the boys say--the final +appeal in his own household--his idea of the dignity of the masculine +prerogative." + +A sudden stop. I thought she expected me to say something, so I began: + +"I don't know. I doubt it. It looks to me like a case of--" + +"Don't! don't!" exclaimed my wife, in tragic accents "oh, _don't_ catch +it. I really couldn't live with a chronic objector. Anything else. I +really believe I could stand any other phase of bullying better than +that--to feel that at any minute I am liable to run against a solid wall +of 'I don't agree with you!' If it were _real_ I wouldn't mind it so +much; but to hear that man 'kick,' as you say, just for the sake +of asserting himself, and then come around as he does, is perfectly +maddening. The very first symptom I see in you I shall look upon it as a +danger signal--I'll move." + +At that moment, before our quiet little laugh, at their expense, had +died away, there floated out from the bedroom window of our neighbors' +cottage, this refrain: + +"Well, goodness knows, Margaret, _I_ didn't want to come home. I knew it +was all perfect nonsense. If you--" + +My wife suddenly arose, took me by the hand and said quite seriously: +"Come in the house, dear. This atmosphere is too unwholesome to endure +any longer." + +The next day she said to me, "Let's go to Old Point Comfort next year." + +"All right," said I; "but what shall we do with the cottage? You know we +hold the lease for another year, with the 'refusal' to buy." + +"Rent it to your worst enemy, or, better still, get him to buy it. Just +think of the exquisite revenge you could take that way. Twenty-four +hours every day, for four long months each year, to know that you had +him planted next door to a 'chronic kicker.' Or don't you hate anybody +bad enough for that?" and my wife actually shuddered. + +"I don't believe I do, dear," said I; "but I'll do my level best to +_rent_ it to him for one season. You know I wouldn't care to murder him; +if he's hopelessly maimed I'll be satisfied." + +We both laughed; but the next day I advertised the lease of a cottage +for sale very cheap, and gave as a reason my desire to go where there +were fewer people. I think this will catch my enemy. He likes a crowd, +and he'd enjoy nothing better than to feel that I was forced to pay half +of his rent. So I marked the paper and sent it to him, and confidently +await the result. + + + + +FOR THE PROSECUTION. + +_"So deeply inherent is it in this life of ours that men have to suffer +for each other's sins, so inevitably diffusive is human sufferings that +even Justice makes its victims, and we can conceive no retribution +that does not spread beyond its mark in pulsations of unmerited +pain."_--George Eliot. + + + + +I. + +Shortly after Fred Mathews began the practice of law he was elected to +the office of Prosecuting Attorney in the Western town to which he had +gone when first admitted to the bar. + +Of course, every law student becomes familiar with the jests and +gibes cast at the members of the profession as men who are peculiarly +economical of the truth. He smiles with those who hint that a lawyer is +always lavish of advice that leads to litigation. + +That students of Blackstone and Coke hear much merrymaking over and some +serious criticism of the quibbles to which the best of them are +supposed to resort--of making little of real evidence and much +of trivialities--goes without saying. Nor are they unaware of the +fact--alas! sometimes too well founded upon strong evidence--that +the general public appears to be convinced that laws are made for the +purpose of shielding the rich and oppressing the poor or unfortunate. + +No student of average ability enters practice uninformed that there is +a widespread belief that a man of social position or financial power +has little to fear as a result of his misdeeds, while his less fortunate +neighbor could not hope to escape the worst legal consequences of his +most trivial lapse from rectitude. + +Fred Mathews had made up his mind--as many a young fellow had done +before him--that he would do everything in his power to hold the scales +of justice level. + +He determined that such ability as he possessed should be used for the +benefit of society, and that neither bribe nor threat should ever entice +him from the strict performance of his duty to the profession which he +had entered. He would never accept a case in which he did not honestly +believe. No man's money should buy him and no man's wrath intimidate. In +short, he intended to be a lawyer with a conscience as well as a man of +integrity, no matter what the result might be. + +He made so good a beginning in the first two years of his practice that +it was at the end of the third, when he found himself holding the office +of Prosecuting Attorney, with a record clean, and fair sailing ahead, +that a piece of news which came to him caused him to doubt himself for +the first time. + +The shock of that doubt thrilled every fibre in his nature, for with it +came the one fear that is terrible to a brave mind which is aroused for +the first time to its own possibilities--the fear to trust itself--the +dread lest it betray its own higher nature under the pressure of old +habits of thought or new social problems. + +Right and wrong had always seemed to him to have the most decided and +clear-cut outlines. He had never thought of himself as standing before +them unable to distinguish their boundaries. He had felt that he could +answer bravely enough the question: "What would you do if required to +choose between honor and dishonor?" It was a strange thing to him that +his present perplexity should grow out of a simple burglary case. There +did not appear to him, at first, to be more than one side to such a +case. He was the Prosecuting Attorney. A store had been robbed. Among +other things a sealskin sacque was taken. By means of this cloak the +burglary had been traced--it was claimed--to a certain young man high +in social life. The duties of his office had led the State's attorney to +prosecute the investigation with his usual vigor and impartiality until +he had succeeded beyond his fairest hopes. Indeed, the chain of evidence +now in his possession was so strong and complete that he--for the first +time in his career--recognized that he shrank from using the testimony +at his command. + +He felt that it was his duty to cause to be apprehended a young man who +had up to the present time borne a spotless reputation; who had been a +fellow student at college; whose social position was that of a leader, +and who was soon to marry one of the most charming girls in the town. +The situation was painful, but Fred Mathews felt that his own honor was +at stake quite as truly as was that of his old schoolfellow. Here was +his first opportunity to show that he held his duty above his desires. +Here was the first case in which social influence and financial power +were on the side of a criminal whom it was his duty to prosecute to the +end. + +His professional pride, as well as his honor, was enlisted; for this +was the third burglary which had been committed recently, and so far the +"gang"--as the newspapers assumed and the police believed the offenders +to be--had not been caught. + +Fred Mathews now thought he had every reason to believe that the same +hand had executed all three crimes and that the recklessness of +the last--the almost Wanton defiance of perfectly natural means of +precaution and concealment--had led to the discovery of this burglar in +high life. + +After long deliberation, however, the young prosecutor made up his +mind that he would so far compromise with his conscience as to make a +personal, private call upon the young man who was under suspicion and +boldly accuse him of the theft of the tell-tale cloak that had been +traced to him, and take the consequences. + +He was well aware that in case this course should lead to the escape of +the criminal he would be compelled to bear the abuse and suspicion which +would surely follow, for the evidence had passed through other hands +than his own. + +He knew that he was taking a method which would be called in question, +and that he would not take it if the suspected man lived in a less +fashionable street or had the misfortune to be low born. + +All this he knew quite well, and still he argued to himself that it was +the right thing for him to do, or at least that it was the best possible +under the circumstances, and that after giving Walter Banks a private +chance to clear himself--if such a thing were possible--he would still +be in a position to go on with the case, if that should be necessary. + +That night, for the first time in his career, he allowed himself to be +kept awake, not by the fear that he should fail through inexperience in +his duty to his client--as had happened sometimes to trouble him earlier +in his professional life--but by a dread that he should wilfully betray +his trust to the public. At two o'clock he lay staring at the wall, +asking himself if he was becoming corrupt; if he, too, believed in +shielding guilt if only that guilt were dressed in purple and spoke with +a soft and cultured accent. + + + + +II. + +"Mr. Banks will be down in a moment;" the trim maid had said, and left +the library door open as she withdrew. + +The young prosecutor walked about the room uneasily. He had hoped at +the last moment that the object of his call would be from home--that he +would take fright and refuse to be seen--that action had been taken by +the police which would put it out of his power to give the warning that +he now felt he was here to give. But, no. "Mr. Banks will be down in +a moment." He had heard quite distinctly, and there had not been the +slightest accent of fear or annoyance in the voice that spoke. + +In his agitation he had taken up a curiously wrought paper knife which +lay upon the table and had dropped it as if it had burned his fingers. + +"Good God!" he exclaimed. "_He_ was the college thief. It is no new +thing, then." + +He took up the knife again and examined it closely. There could be no +mistake. It was a gold wrought, elaborately engraved blade, set in a +handle which had no duplicate, for the students, who had planned the +gift which had so mysteriously disappeared had devised and caused to be +engraved a secret symbol which was cut deep in the polished surface. + +It was to have been a surprise for one of the favorites in the faculty. +It had disappeared--and here it was! + +"Good morning, Mathews. This is really very kind. I--" + +It was the voice of Walter Banks, but their eyes met over the fallen +paper knife, which had dropped from trembling fingers at the first word. + +A great wave of color rushed into the face of young Banks. The +prosecutor stood mute and pale. Involuntarily he had tried to cover the +knife with a corner of the rug as he turned to meet his host. It vaguely +dawned upon him that he was a guest in a house where he was playing the +part of a detective. His hand was extended in the hearty western fashion +which had become second nature to him, but Walter Banks did not take it. + +"Will you sit down?" said the host in a tone which was hoarse, and quite +unlike the frank, free voice that spoke a moment before. + +As he seated himself he bent forward and took up the bit of tell-tale +gold and ivory. Then he said, slowly in a tone that was scarcely +audible: + +"Yes, I took it. You are right. It _is_ the college knife." + +"Don't! don't!" exclaimed Fred Mathews, rising. "I am-- You forget-- I +am-- My office. Think. I am for the prosecution!" His face was livid. +Young Banks leaned heavily against the table. The color began to die +out of his lips. His hand trembled as he laid the knife upon the table. +Neither spoke. The brain of the young prosecutor found only scraps +and shreds of thought, in which such words as duty, honor, pity, +hospitality, wealth, social order, floated vaguely here and there, +buffeted by the one insistent idea that he should go--go quickly--and +leave this man alone with his shame and humiliation. + +Walter Banks was the first to speak. + +"Come up to my room. Mother might come in here and--I suppose--you have +come about-- I--Is--? You say you are for the prosecution. Have they +traced the cloak to me?" + +The lawyer stepped back again and looked at the man before him. What +could he mean by saying such a thing as that--_to him?_ They had never +been close friends, but now in spite of everything the thought that +he was the prosecutor kept itself steadily in the attorney's mind and +struggled with a pity and reluctance that were seeking to justify him by +a belief in the insanity of young Banks. + +No one but a lunatic would have made that last remark. The thought was a +relief. He grasped at it eagerly and began to fashion his mental outlook +to fit the idea. Then suddenly came to him with overwhelming force all +he had ever heard or read of the failure of justice where criminals of +high degree were concerned. + +He had followed his host to the stairs. Suddenly he turned, caught +up his hat from the stand where he had left it, and passed out of the +street door without a word. Once in the street he glanced involuntarily +up at the house. At the window of the room he had just left stood Walter +Banks. His arm was about his mother's shoulders, and both were very +pale. There was a strange likeness between them. + + + + +III. + +Every conceivable form of pressure to prevent the trial of Walter Banks +was brought to bear in the next few weeks; but Prosecutor Mathews had +pushed the case vigorously in spite of it all. He felt not only that +justice was at stake, but that his own moral fibre was in pawn, as +well. He held aloof from his social friends--who were in many cases the +friends of the accused, also--lest he lose sight of his duty through +some fresh or new form of attack upon his integrity of purpose. + +It had come to his knowledge that even the Judge who was to sit in the +case had been approached by the friends of the defendant, and it was +felt that it would be difficult to impanel a jury that would or could be +fair and impartial. + +If but one man was drawn from the "upper class," the jury would be sure +to hang. On the other hand, if all of the talesmen were chosen from that +social caste which feels that it is usually the victim, it would go hard +with Walter Banks even if he were able--as seemed wholly unlikely--to +show a reasonably clear case in his favor. + +The day came. The court-room held an unusual audience. There were many +ladies present who had never before seen the inside of such a room. They +held their breath and were filled with awe and fear--of they knew not +what. + +Perhaps few men can realize what it is to a woman to face for the first +time the embodiment of all that her strong faith and utter ignorance has +carried to mature years as an ideal of justice and dignity--of solemn +obligation and fearful responsibility. To her there has been no reverse +side to the picture. She believes in courts as courts of justice. She +knows nothing of quibble, of technicality, of precedent. Nothing here +is light or humorous to her. Next to a death chamber the criminal +court-room is fullest of the thoughts which reach beyond mere human +responsibility and import, and all that passes there is freighted for +her with a sense of finality that few men can comprehend. _They_ think +of reversal of judgment. + +The fiat of the court is the closing knell to a woman; and although she +may know the judge in private life to be a fallible or--more incongruous +still--a jovial man, his presence _here_ is overpowering. Of the jury +she feels vaguely, dread. Of the judge, awe. + +The mother of the prisoner sat near him. Her sad, pale, refined face +troubled the young prosecutor sorely and he tugged at his conscience and +spurred on his resolution after each glance at her. + +The case was so plain, the evidence so clear, the defence so weak that +the whole tide of public sentiment swung rapidly from the side of the +prisoner to that of the people. + +The indignation for him which had been felt by the society women who had +come to show themselves as his friends changed into scorn and contempt. +The whole mental atmosphere of the room underwent a revolution. When +court opened few besides the officers believed him guilty. As the +case drew near its close no one believed him innocent. He had not been +allowed by his counsel to take the stand in his own behalf, and this had +told strongly against him in the minds of both jury and spectators. The +prosecuting attorney had made a telling speech, and the charge of the +judge was plainly indicative of his opinion that there was but one +verdict to give. + +The jury had taken but one ballot. They had needed no charge from the +judge at all. + +"Guilty,"--came from the foreman's lips with a decided accent that +indicated a certain satisfaction in pronouncing it. The prisoner's face +grew a shade paler, but the puzzled light in his eyes lost nothing of +that weary, insistent questioning that had marked their depths all day. +Indeed, he seemed to be as much surprised, as the evidence had been +unfolded, as were the friends who were there to see him vindicated. + +During the speech of the prosecutor and the charge of the judge young +Banks; mother had held her son's hand and tears had dropped unheeded +from her eyes. + +The judge had spoken again, but no one moved. The attorney for the +prisoner bent forward and touched him on the shoulder. + +"Stand up for sentence," he said. "The judge"-- + +"Sit still!" It was the woman beside him who spoke. She had dried her +tears. Every face in the room was turned toward her now. She staggered +to her feet. Her voice penetrated every corner of the room. + +"_I_ am the thief, judge. Sentence me. I stole the cloak!" + +"Mother, mother! Great God, it is not true! Mother, sit down! She never +saw the coat. Mother! Mother! Great God, what does it mean?" + +The young fellow had sprung to his feet, but she eluded his grasp, and +before any one knew what she intended to do she passed onto the witness +stand. + +There was a tense silence in the room. No one was prepared for the +scene. It had been so swiftly done--so wholly without warning--that +every one sat dumb. + +She had caught up the Bible as she reached the stand and pressed it +to her lips. She was vaguely aware that this act was looked upon as +affecting the credibility of the witness. She also imagined that it gave +her a right to put in her evidence even at this stage of the trial. She +supposed that a trial was for the purpose of arriving at the facts and +that the Court sat with that object alone in view. She did not know that +it was too late. She was unaware that the case would have to be reopened +to admit her evidence. She did not know that it was possible for the +gate of justice to be swung shut in the face of truth. She supposed +that all trials were for the one purpose of getting at the bottom of the +case; so that it did not occur to her that her action was strange only +in so far as such a confession from such a woman must be so regarded by +all who knew her, and who was there in all the town who did not know and +respect her? + +The young prosecutor sat mute. The eyes of the judge widened in +astonishment. For the moment he was the man and neighbor only. He forgot +his office. She was talking rapidly, and all were listening. + +"I am the thief, judge. Let me tell you. It is not right that he should +suffer for my crime. Poor boy, his life has been a hell on earth for +_me--for me!_ And he has never understood. I could not tell him. I shall +now. He shall understand. _You_ shall, judge. Oh, God, if only a woman +sat where you do--a mother! But let me tell you; I can. I thought I +could not; but I can--even to _these_ gentlemen." She waved her hand +toward the jury and there was a widening of her nostrils as if her +breath and courage were leaving her. "Rather than have him punished, +disgraced, ruined, I can tell it all. He is _not_ guilty. It is I! It is +I!" She put her trembling hands to her temples and her eyes were those +of a hunted creature at bay. + +"Before he came into the world--you'll let me tell you frankly, judge? +_I must_. Before he came into the world I made him what he is--a thief. +Did I or did his father? It was like this. I am ashamed to tell it, but, +oh, judge, I _loved_ him, and I longed to make the pretty things and +buy the dainty ones that would make his soft, white, dimpled flesh +look sweeter when he should lie before me. His father was--you knew his +father, judge. He was a good man, but-- You know how he loved money--and +power. He-- I-- I was the pauper most young wives are. I was too proud +to ask for money, and if I _had_ asked often-- But I was too proud, so, +perhaps, I need not tell about the if. Most women know it, and-- You +could not understand." + +She paused. A panic had overtaken her nerves. She was becoming vaguely +conscious of her position. Her eyes wandered over the room; but when +they fell upon her son, sitting with his wretched face pinched and +startled, with his deep eyes staring at her, her courage came again. + +"At first I had no thought of theft. I used to go each night after my +husband fell asleep and take a little money from his pocket. Only +a little. He never missed it--never. So he used to whip the boy for +stealing afterward and said he would disgrace us and-- I never told +him even then. Life was horrible. The growing certainty maddened me. He +would steal anything, everything about the house, even his own things. +He did not understand himself and he could not help it; but I did not +think it would ever come to _this_--through me--_through me!_" + +She calmed herself again suddenly by a glance at her son. + +"Every night I took only a little money. My motive was a good one. +I knew my husband did not understand how I longed to get the pretty +things. How-- Of course in one sense I had a right to the money. He was +rich even then, but--I _felt_ myself a--pauper--and a thief. + +"I-- Do you think young mothers should be young paupers, judge? I've +sometimes thought that if they were not there might be less use for +courts like this--and prisons. + +"I've sometimes thought if mothers sat on juries they'd know the reasons +why for crime and wrong and, maybe, work to cure the causes of +the crimes rather than simply punish those who have committed them +blindly--_often blindly_. + +"I've sometimes thought the cost--in money--would be less; and then the +cost in love and sorrow! Oh, judge, be patient just a little longer. +Do not let them stop me. It means so much to _us!_ I'll go back to +the point. I'll tell the truth--all of it--all. But it is hard to do +it--here. + +"I bought the little wardrobe; but remember, judge, the months and +months of daily building, bone on bone, fibre within fibre, thought on +thought that is moulded into shape for human beings! + +"I knew your father, judge. Your eyes are like his, but all your mental +life--your temperament--you got from other blood than filled his veins. + +"Your father's mother gave you your character. Your gentle heart is +hers--your patient thoughtfulness. I knew her well. I knew your mother, +too. She was the teacher of my motherhood. It was to her I told the +truth in my boy's childhood--when I first began to realize or fear +what I had done. You owe it all to her that you are strong and true. She +understood in time--and now you sit in judgment on my boy, whose mother +learned from yours too late the meaning and the danger of it all. +She saved my other children. I killed my pride for them. _I asked +for money_. The others may be _beggars_ some day--they never will be +thieves. + +"That boy has never asked a favor. He simply cannot. His pride was +always stronger than anything--anything except his love for me. + +"I knit that in his blood too. I loved him so I made myself a thief for +him. Of course I did not know--I did not understand the awful danger +then; but-- A young mother--I--it is hard to tell it here. You will not +understand--you cannot. Oh, God, for a mother on the jury! A mother on +the bench!" + +She caught at her escaping courage again. The officer whose duty it +was to take her away moved forward a second time, and a second time the +judge motioned him back. She had been his mother's friend ever since +he could remember, and the ordinary discipline of the court was not for +her. He would do his duty, he said to himself, but surely there was no +haste. All this was irregular, of course, but if something should come +of it that gave excuse for a new trial no one would be more thankful +than he. + +"Young mothers are so ignorant. They know so little of all the things of +which they should know much. They are so helpless. Judge, there will +be criminal courts and prisons--oh, so many of both--just as long as +motherhood is ignorant and helpless and swayed by feeling only. Don't +you know it is ignorance and feeling that leads to crime? If people only +understood! If only they were able to think it out to what it means, +crimes would not be--but they cannot, they cannot! Those trembling +lips you see before you are no more truly a copy of mine--the boy is +as responsible for the set and curve of those lips--as he is for his +hopeless fault. He has stolen from his infancy; but I, not he, am the +thief. Now sentence the real criminal, judge. Courts are to punish the +guilty--not to further curse the helpless victims. I am the criminal +here. Sentence me!" + +"Mother! Mother! I never understood my-self before! Oh, mother, mother!" + +It was a wild cry from Walter Banks as his mother had risen asking for +sentence on herself. He sprang forward, forgetting everything and took +her in his arms. There was a great stir in the room. + +"Silence in the court!" + +Mrs. Banks had fainted. Her son helped to carry her into another room. +No one attempted to prevent him. The young prosecutor returned with him +and stood dumb before the court. + +"I am ready for sentence, your Honor. I committed the burglary." It was +the voice of the prisoner. He was standing with his arms folded and his +eyes cast down. Silence fell in the room. The women ceased to sob. There +was an uneasy movement in the jury box. + +"In view of the new evidence--" began the foreman but the voice of the +judge, slow and steady, filled the room. + +"It is the sentence of this court that you, Walter Banks, be confined at +hard labor in the state penitentiary for the term of four years." + +The prisoner bowed and turned a shade paler. + +"Do not tell mother that until she is better," he said to his attorney +and passed out in the custody of the sheriff. + +"And at the end of four years, what!" a lady was saying to the young +prosecutor as the room slowly emptied. + +"The brute!" was hurled after the judge by another, as his form vanished +through the door. + +"Shows that law is not for the poor alone--" + +"Good things for social order and--" + +"Well, yes, I'm rather disappointed; but of course a judge can't go +behind the returns." + +"Evidence all one way if--" + +"Heavens, what a scene!" + +"--my opinion no woman should ever be admitted to a court room except as +a prisoner. It--" + +"Feather in the cap of the prosecutor." + +"--re-election sure enough now." + +"Whole thing in a nutshell--" + +"Simple question. _Did_ he commit the burglary? If so--" + +The young prosecutor hurried away from the sound of these voices and +the congratulations of his political friends. He was mentally sore and +perplexed because he had won his case. + +That night he called upon the prisoner for the second time. + +"I have made up' my mind to resign my office," he said, not looking at +the convict, who had risen to receive him. + +Walter Banks was by far the calmer of the two, but he did not speak. + +"I shall never be able to act for the prosecution again. I thought +this case was so clear. My duty seemed so plain--too plain to admit of +anything but the most vigorous course of action; but--" + +"You did nothing but your duty, Mathews. We are all victims I +suppose--one way or another. You are going to be the victim of your +sensitive conscience. The result will be a course of vacillation that +will ruin your chances of success. I am sorry. You've got all the +elements for a leader--only you've got a conscience. That settles it. A +bit of heredity like that is as fatal as--as mine." He bit his lips. + +"Don't let your part in my case worry you. The game of life has gone +against me. That is all. The dice were loaded before I ever got hold of +them. I did what I could to out-live--out-fight my awful--inheritance. +I wasn't strong enough. It got the best of me. Nature is a terrible +antagonist. Perhaps now that I understand myself better I shall be able +to keep a firmer hold. You did your duty, Mathews; good-by. Be-- Can't +you be a little kind to mother? She suffers so. Her punishment is +double--and her crime was ignorance!" + +This time he took the hand that was held out to him. + +"Only ignorance," he added. "It seems an awful punishment for that." + +"Ignorance--and poverty and love," said the young prosecutor as the +door closed behind him, "and Nature did the rest! What a grip is at +our throats! And how we help blind Nature in her cruel work by laws and +customs and conditions! What a little way we've come from barbarism +yet! How slow we travel. But we are moving," he added with a deep sigh. +"Moving a little. There is light ahead. If not for us, then for those +who come after." + +He heard the bolt slip behind him and shuddered. + +"It might as easily have been I," he mused as he went down the steps, +and shuddered again. + +"I doubt if it was fault of his or virtue of mine that determined which +of us two should be the prosecutor." + + + + +A RUSTY LINK IN THE CHAIN. + + +_"In the brainy that wondrous world with one inhabitant, there are +recesses dim and dark, treacherous sands and dangerous shores, where +seeming sirens tempt and fade; streams that rise in unknown lands from +hidden springs, strange seas with ebb and flow of tides, resistless +billows urged by storms of flame, profound and awful depths hidden +by mist of dreams, obscure and phantom realms where vague and fearful +things are half revealed, jungles where passion's tigers crouch, and +skies of cloud and hue where fancies fly with painted wings that dazzle +and mislead; and the poor sovereign of this pictured world is led by old +desires and ancient hates, and stained by crimes of many vanished years, +and pushed by hands that long ago were dust, until he feels like some +bewildered slave that Mockery has throned and crowned."_ + +Ingersoll. + + +When I called, last Sunday afternoon, as was my habit, upon my old +college friend--now a distinguished physician--I found him sitting in +his office holding in his hand a letter. His manner was unusually grave +and, I thought, troubled. I asked him, laughingly, if he had had bad +news from beyond the seas--from his Castle in Spain. + +"No, it is worse than that, I fear," he said gravely. "It looks to +me very much like bad news from beyond the grave--from the Castle of +Heredity in the realm of an Ancestor." + +"I hope, doctor, that you have not had,--that my little jest was not a +cruel touch upon a real hurt." + +"Not at all, not at all, old fellow," he said, smiling a little. + +"It is not my own trouble at all; but--well, it set me to thinking +strange thoughts. Shall I tell you about it? I should really like +to know just how it would impress you--an intelligent man out of the +profession." + +He placed the letter on the table beside him, looked at me steadily for +a moment, and then began: + +"It may be as well to say that I have never before ventured to tell the +story of George Wetherell's curious experience, simply because I have +always felt certain that to a really intelligent and well-in-formed +physician it would be a comparatively familiar, and not specially +startling (although a wholly uncomprehended) phase of human disorder; +while to many, not of the profession, it would appear to involve such +fearful and far-reaching results, that they would either refuse to +believe it possible at all, or else jump to the conclusion that numerous +cases which have only some slight point of similarity are to be classed +with it and explained upon the same basis. + +"In regard to these latter persons, I do not intend to convey +the impression that I am either ambitious to shield them from the +consequences of their own nimble and unguarded reckonings, or that by my +silence in this particular instance I suppose that I have prevented them +from forming quite as erroneous opinions founded upon some other equally +misunderstood and ill-digested scrap of psychological and medical +information. + +"But it has sometimes seemed to me that there were certain features +connected with the case of George Wetherell which, in the hands of the +ignorant or unscrupulous, might easily be used to the disadvantage of +their fellow-beings, and I have therefore hesitated to lay it before any +one who was not, in my opinion, both intelligent and honorable enough +to accept it as one of the strange manifestations in an individual +experience; and to understand, because of the innumerable conditions of +mental and physical heredity--which were not likely ever to occur again +in the same proportions--that therefore the same manifestations were, +not to be looked for in a sufficient number of persons to ever make this +case in any sense a type or a guide. + +"Notwithstanding this, there are, as I said in the first place, certain +features connected with it which many members of the medical profession +will recognize; but they are none the less puzzling symptoms. + +"The matter has been brought back with unusual force to my mind at this +time, by a circumstance connected with one of Wetherell's children, +which is detailed in this letter. It lends a new touch of interest +to the malady of the father. To enable you to obtain even a fairly +comprehensive idea of the strange development, it will be necessary for +me to tell you, first, something about the man and his surroundings. + +"To be as brief as I may, then, he was the son of a merry, whole-souled, +stout, and, withal, mentally alert, Southern gentleman, who had taken +the law into his own hands and duly scandalized the reputable part of +the community in which he lived by giving his slaves (all of whom he or +his wife had inherited) their freedom at a time and under circumstances +which made it necessary for him to betake himself with some considerable +alacrity to a part of the country where it was looked upon as +respectable to pay for the voluntary services of one's fellowmen, rather +than to pay for the man himself with the expectation that the services +were to be thrown in. + +"Of course it was imperative--not only for the peace, but for the safety +of all parties concerned--for him to transport both his family and his +freed-men to a place where it was at once honorable for a white man +to do such a deed and for a black man to own himself. This he did; and +while a number of the negroes remained in the service of the family, the +son (on whose account, and to prevent whom from believing in and being +enervated by the possession of slaves the step had, in great measure, +been taken) had grown to manhood with a curious mingling of Southern +sympathies and Northern reasoning and convictions. + +"The outbreak of the war found the young fellow struggling bravely, with +all the fire and energy of a peculiarly gifted nature, to establish +a newspaper in a border State, and to convince his readers that the +extension of slavery would be a grave calamity, not only for the owned +but for the owner. + +"His two associates were Eastern college-bred men, and it was therefore +deemed wisest to push young Wetherell forward as the special champion +of free soil, under the illusion that his Southern birth and sympathies +would win for him a more ready and kindly hearing on a subject which +at that time was a dangerous one to handle freely, especially in the +border-land then under dispute. + +"But the three young enthusiasts had reckoned, as young people will, +upon a certain degree of reason about, and calm discussion of, a +question which at that time they still recognized as having two very +strong and serious sides; for they had not taken the stand of the +Abolition party at all. They called themselves free-soil Democrats, and +were simply arguing against the extension of an institution which they +were not yet prepared to believe it wise to attempt to abolish where +it was already established, and where there was seemingly no other +peaceable or fair solution than the one of limitation and gradual +emancipation, through the process of mental and moral development of the +ruling race. This position was not an unnatural one, surely, for young +Wetherell, and was only what might have been expected from the son of +a man who had given practical demonstration of the possibility of such +evolution in the slave-holding and slave-dependent class. + +"But, as I have intimated, the confidence and reasonableness of youth +had led to a complete misconception as to the temper of the opposition. +It is quite possible that the frank, passionate, free-soil editorials, +if they had come from either of the Eastern men, might have been +accepted as the delusions of youth, the prejudice of section, or, +at worst, as the arguments of partisans; but from a man of Southern +birth--the son of a law-breaker (you must remember that the +enfranchisement of the slaves had been a serious infraction of the law, +strange as that sounds to the ears of the present generation)--from the +son of such a man they could mean only a malicious desire to stir up +strife and cause bloodshed by making restless slaves dangerous and +dangerous slaves desperate. The result was that one night, after the +issue of a paper containing an article of unusual force and power, young +Wetherell found himself startled from a sound sleep, in the back room of +his office, by the smell of smoke and gleam of flame. + +"He understood their significance at a glance, and knew that escape by +the front door meant a reception by masked men, five minutes for prayer, +and--a rope. + +"Springing from the back window into the river, he swam to the other +shore, and within a few days raised the first regiment of volunteers +that the State sent in response to the call of the President, and cut +adrift at once and forever from all effort to argue the case from an +ethical or a financial outlook. + +"It is more than likely that anger may have had something to do with +his sudden conversion from a 'peace and argument,' to first a 'war +Democrat,' and shortly thereafter to a Republican; but be that as it +may, it is certain that at such crises as these, mental activity is +spurred and radical changes are made with a rapidity and decision +astonishing to contemplate in periods of quiet and peace. + +"So it came about that this lad of twenty-three suddenly found himself +at the head of a regiment of somewhat desperate border men, most of whom +were more than twice his own age, wildly charging a battery in one of +the first battles of the war. + +"He received three wounds, one of which was a slight abrasion of the +scalp, not looked upon as more than a scratch by either the surgeon or +himself; indeed, it would hardly be worth mentioning but for the strange +events which followed. Whether this wound had anything to do with the +condition of which I am about to tell, you will have to decide for +yourself; but I must warn you, in the beginning, that there was nothing +like a fracture of the skull, and the little path made by the bullet +through the scalp healed without trouble, almost without attention, and +never afterward gave the slightest pain. + +"The hair, it is true, did not grow again over the parting, and, as +it was nearly in the middle of his head, it made him an involuntary +follower of the fashion of a certain effeminate type of youths for whom +he had an overwhelming contempt. Neither of the other two wounds was +serious, and after a very short period in the hospital he reported for +duty, was promoted, and given sole charge of a post of considerable +importance. + +"Shortly thereafter his father received a some what discomposing +telegram. He had previously had several more or less lucid despatches +from his son while the patient was still in the hospital; but any +lack of clearness in their wording had been attributed to haste or +to carelessness in the transmission, and as they all indicated rapid +recovery, no undue anxiety had been felt. But the message in question +now produced the impression that there was something wrong. It read: +'Send me one thousand swords immediately.' + +"After a few moments' consultation with the boy's mother, Mr. Wetherell +packed his hand-bag, and, armed with a letter from President Lincoln, +whose personal friend he was, started for the seat of war. + +"Upon arriving at his destination, the son expressed no surprise +whatever, but much pleasure, at seeing his father. He asked, in the most +natural and affectionate way, about each member of the family, and then +suddenly put his hand to his head and appeared to be in deep thought. + +"His eyes contracted in the manner peculiar to some persons when +attempting to recall a long-forgotten event; but in a moment this had +passed away and he appeared to be perfectly clear and natural. + +"He attended to the affairs of his office in a manner which not only +escaped criticism, but won praise from his superiors, and conversed with +great freedom and marked intelligence on the stirring subjects of the +time. + +"He had had some little fever while his wounds were fresh, but in no +degree to cause alarm, and even this had now almost entirely left +him. In short, he appeared to be in nearly perfect mental and physical +health. There was, however, one peculiarity which the father noticed as +unfamiliar in his son; but as it was not at all strange that so young a +man--or any man, indeed, who had suddenly been given control of matters +of such grave importance--should at times be very quiet and appear to be +struggling to recall some matter of moment, the habit was not given more +than passing attention, and it was not sufficiently marked to be noticed +at all by any one except a near relation. At these times young Wetherell +would contract his eyebrows, look steadily at some object near him,--as +the toe of his boot or the palm of his hand,--raise his head suddenly, +gaze at the distant horizon, bite his lip, and then appear to either +give it up or be satisfied with some mental solution of his puzzle. + +"One day his father said: 'What is it, George?' + +"The young fellow turned his eyes quickly upon his father and asked: + +"'Have I forgotten anything? It seems to me there is something I just +fail to recall. I am on the edge of it constantly, but it slips. I can't +get quite enough hold on it to be sure what it is--or to be certain, +indeed, that it is anything. Can you think of anything I ought to do +that I have overlooked?' + +"This all sounded natural enough, and was, seemingly, a condition not +unfamiliar to his father, so they began together going over the duties +pertaining to the son's office to see if, by a mischance, something had +been neglected. Everything was complete and in perfect order; but still +the look returned from time to time, until it became almost habitual. + +"This was ten days after his father had reached camp, and his plan was +to leave for home that afternoon; for, as I said, the boy's wounds +were almost entirely healed, and he appeared to be in need of nothing +whatever. More and more his superior officers called him into their +councils, and more and more his clear judgment was commended by them. + +"He was to walk to the train with his father. The moment they were +outside the limits of the camp George remarked, casually, 'I must stop +on the way and order those swords.' + +"The remark recalled the queer telegram which had caused Mr. Wetherell +to come to his son, the wording of which had been wholly obliterated +from his mind by their meeting. + +"'What swords?' inquired his father, now on the alert again. + +"The young fellow turned and looked at his father for a moment, and then +said: 'I don't know. It is a secret order. Don't mention it. The general +told me to order them. They are to be sent to me.' + +"This all seemed probable enough to Mr. Wetherell, and yet he somehow +felt, rather than saw, a queer change in his son's eyes, which he +thought he had noticed once or twice before. + +"He decided not to return home for the present. + +"When he told his son this, the boy took it quite as a matter of course, +and made no comment whatever on the sudden alteration of purpose. + +"On the way back to camp George stepped into a military supply station +and ordered fourteen hundred swords to be delivered to him immediately. + +"By this time his father had made up his mind that there were short +intervals in which the young colonel did not know exactly what he was +doing--or, rather, that while he did know and act intelligently--from +the outlook of the moment--it was a time wholly disconnected from +the rest of his life, and when the moment was past he had no farther +recollection of it. + +"However, Mr. Wetherell was not sure enough of this to risk compromising +a probably brilliant future by a premature or unnecessarily public +announcement, and he therefore allowed the order to be made, and taken +in good faith, and walked back to camp with his son, who immediately +went about his duties in the most intelligent and scrupulously careful +manner. + +"Mr. Wetherell, however, made a call upon the officer in command the +moment he could do so without attracting attention; and after a long +talk (in which the secret sword order was discovered to be a delusion), +it was decided that the recently recovered invalid should retire +from the field on the sick leave, which he had previously refused to +consider. + +"When he was told of this arrangement, he agreed to it without a murmur, +and began, for the first time for many days, to have his wounds (which +were now past the need of it) dressed with much care. This he continued +every morning, but by the time they reached home he had become possessed +with the belief that his chief wound was in his side, where there had +not been a scratch. + +"To humor him, the family physician applied bandages to the imaginary +injury every day regularly. + +"All this time there was no clearer talker, no more acute reasoner, no +more simple, earnest, gentlemanly fellow to be found than Col. George +Wetherell, whom his townsmen were honoring and inducing to make public +speeches and write clear, firm, inspiring editorials for one of the +leading papers. No one except his own family and physician suspected for +a moment that he was not mentally as bright as he always had been, and +even the younger members of the family were without the least hint of +it. + +"Indeed, his father and the doctor both thought that his only illusion +now was a belief in the wound in his side. Several weeks passed, and +even this indication was losing its force, for he no longer required +medical attention, and was as well and as rational as ever in his life, +so far as any one could perceive, when one day a stranger appeared and +asked for him. Mr. Wetherell requested the gentleman (who was evidently +laboring under great excitement) to be seated, and at the same time made +up his own mind to be present during the interview. + +"Colonel Wetherell was summoned, and, on entering the room, looked in +a startled way at the stranger, smiled vaguely, extended his hand, +contracted his eyes into a long, narrow line, turned white, and throwing +both arms suddenly above his head, exclaimed: 'My God! my God! what have +I done? Where am I? How long has it been? Is she dead? Is she dead?' and +staggered back into his father's arms. + +"His distress was so manifest, that the visitor lost his severity at +once, and said quite gently: 'No, she is not dead; but she is almost +insane with fright, and has been so exhausted with anxiety and tears, +that we had lost all hope for her reason, or even for her life, unless +I could find you. I have been through the lines, was delayed by the loss +of my passport, and it is now five weeks since I saw her. She is alive, +but--' + +"Young Wetherell sprang to his feet, and turned on his father like +a madman. 'How dared you?' he demanded; 'how dared you keep back my +letters? You have killed her. You have murdered her, poor, delicate +girl, with anxiety and doubt of me.' And then with set teeth and white +lips he advanced upon his father, his arm uplifted, as if he held a +sword, and with a sweep which would have severed chords of steel, if the +weapon had really been within his grasp, he brought his arm across his +father's breast and sank upon the floor, senseless and still. + +"Afterward, when he revived, he had no recollection of what had +occurred, except alone the fact that for many weeks previous he had +forgotten utterly the girl who was to be his wife, whose life and +love were all his world. While he had remembered everything else, had +carefully attended to the smallest details of daily life, the link of +memory that held the fact of her existence had been coated with a rust +of absolute oblivion. The single link in all the chain of memory that +had failed him had been the one the nearest to his heart--the dearest +one of all! + +"They were married two months later, and he resumed command of his +regiment. Through an honorable and eventful life no sign of mental lapse +ever returned; but every day he dreaded it, and watched his wife and +children as a man might do who saw a creeping monster back of those he +loved while he stood paralyzed and dumb. He never seemed to fear that +other things might lose their hold upon his consciousness; but the +apprehension that his mind would slip the link which held his wife, and +leave her sick and faint with anxious fears, which he alone could still, +constantly haunted him. + +"His wounds never troubled him again. He died not long ago. His career +was an exceptionally brilliant one. You would know him if I had given +his real name, for it was in the public ear for years. + +"There were but six persons who ever knew the history of his case, and +they are still unable to explain it--its cause, its direction, its cure. +Or is it cured? Will his children be subject to it? Will it take the +same form? Was it caused by the wound? by the fever? Or were hereditary +conditions so grouped as to produce this mental effect, even if there +had been no wound--no illness? If the latter, will it be transmitted? +These questions come to me with renewed force, to-day, as I hold in my +hand this letter, asking me to give the family history of Col. George +Wetherell for the use of physicians in a distant city who are now +treating his son. This son has reached the precise age at which his +father had the strange experience of which I have just told you. + +"There is a hint in the letter which, in the light of the father's +malady, appears to a physician to be of peculiar importance from a +medical outlook. + +"We shall see, we shall see." + +There was a long pause; then he asked: "Should you, a layman, look +to the wound to explain the condition? Or to the Castle of Heredity? +Suppose the son's malady is quite similar--as now appears--what then?" + + + + +THE BOLER HOUSE MYSTERY. + +_"What would you do? what would you say now, if you were in such a +position?"_--Thackeray. + +_"Thackeray is always protesting that no good is to be done by +blinking the truth. Let us have facts out, and mend what is bad if we +can"_--Trollope. + + +Mr. John Boler had been in the hotel business, as he phrased it, ever +since he was born. Before he could walk he had been the "feature" of his +father's summer hotel, where he was the only baby to be passed around +and hugged into semi-unconsciousness by all the women in the house. +Because of the scarcity of his kind, too, he was subjected to untold +agony by the male guests, most of whom appeared to believe that the +chief desire of his infantile heart was to be tossed skyward from hour +to hour and caught in upstretched hands as he descended with a sickening +sense of insecurity and a wild hysterical laugh. In these later years he +often said that he would like to know who those summer fiends were who +had made his infancy so full of narrow escapes from sudden and violent +death. Finally he thought he had revenge at hand. A benevolent-looking +old gentleman came puffing up to the desk of the Boler House, and, +after registering, proceeded to question the genial proprietor as to his +identity. + +"Dear me, dear me," he puffed, "and so you are the son of old John +Boler, the best hotel-keeper the sun ever shone upon! Why, I remember +tossing you up to the rafters under the porch of your father's house +when you were only the size of a baked apple and mighty nigh as measly +looking. Well, well, to be sure you had grit for a young one. Never got +scared. Always yelled for more. I believe if you had batted your soft +little head against the roof you'd have laughed all the louder and +kicked until you did it again," and the old man chuckled with the +pleasure of age and retrospection. + +"Yes, I remember well," said Mr. Boler, casting about in his own mind +for the form of revenge he should take on this man now that he was to +have the chance for which he had so longed and waited. + +His first thought was to put him in the room next to the three sporting +men who played poker and told questionable stories of their own exploits +after two o'clock every night, but that hardly seemed adequate. The +room adjoining the elevator popped into his head. Every time the old +gentleman fell asleep _bang_ would go that elevator door or _bzzzz_ +would start off the bell so suddenly that it would leave him unnerved +and frantic in the morning. But what was that? What John Boler yearned +for was to make the punishment fit the crime, and, after all these years +of planning and wishing for the chance, here it was, and he felt that he +could think of nothing, absolutely nothing, bad enough. + +So with a fine satire which was wholly lost upon his victim, Mr. Boler +ordered him taken to the very best room in the house, and made up his +mind that after disarming all suspicion in that way he would set about +his revenge, which should take some exquisitely torturous form. + +All this had run through his mind with great rapidity while the old +gentleman talked. Then Mr. Boler turned the register around, wrote "98" +opposite the name. Said he should be delighted to show his own mettle to +one of his father's old guests, called out "Front," and transferred his +attention to a sweet-faced girl who stood waiting her turn to register. + +"A small room, please," she said in a voice scarcely above a whisper. +Mr. Boler knew just what it meant in an instant. He knew that she was +not used to hotels--that she was uncertain what to do, and that she +wanted her living to cost her as little as possible. She was evidently a +lady, and quite as evidently from some small town. + +"Front," he called again. "Show this lady to 96. Step lively." Front +grinned. Ninety-six was a mere closet with no window except one facing a +dark shaft. Indeed, it had once been the dressing-room and clothes press +for the adjoining suite, and so far as Front could remember had never +been used as a sleeping apartment by any one except the valet of a +certain French gentleman who once occupied 98. + +"Took my revenge on the wrong person that time," mused Mr. Boler as he +saw the lady enter the elevator. "Now I wonder why I did that?" But Mr. +John Boler had his little superstition, as most of us have, and whenever +he was moved by a perfectly blind impulse to do a thing, he always +believed that "something would come of it sure," as he expressed it. +"Never knew it to fail. Of course I don't believe in such things; but--" +and then he would laugh and go on believing in it as implicitly as ever. + +All day he brooded over what he should do to old Winkle, as he called +the man in 98, and as surely as his mind grew exhausted and his various +plans fell through, his thoughts would catch a glimpse of the timid +girl in the next room, and he would smilingly wink to himself and say, +"Something will come of it, something will come of it sure. Never put a +guest in that beastly room before, and I had nothing against _her. Must_ +have been him It was after." He always called his blind impulses "It" +when he was utilizing them for superstitious purposes or to quiet his +reason. + +"I'll bet that girl being in that closet will be the means of getting +me even with old Winkle yet, and she is not used to city hotels. She'll +think that it is all right and she will most likely be out all day. It's +not so bad to sleep in after all. Quietest room in the house." + +The next morning Mr. Winkle strolled into the office and harassed Mr. +Boler about his infancy, reminding him that he had possessed a very weak +stomach. "And who wouldn't," thought that gentleman indignantly, "if he +was pitched about like a bale of hay from morning till night by every +fool that got hold of him?" but he smiled pleasantly and said no doubt +he had been very much like other infants, judging from the way he grew +up. He looked upon a baby as the embryonic man, and as he was about an +average adult male biped now, he had most likely been very close to an +average male infant. "I might have been more," he hinted darkly, "but +for certain idiotic people," and then he laughed. For it was not in Mr. +John Boler's nature to be openly unpleasant to any one. This was the +secret of his success as an innkeeper. + +"By the way, Johnnie," said old Mr. Winkle late the next afternoon, "I +thought I heard some one sobbing in the room next to mine last night. +This morning I concluded I was mistaken, but now I'm sure I heard it. +Anybody sick in there? I tried the door that leads into my room but it +was locked. It sounds like a woman's voice. It always did tear the very +heart out of me to hear a woman cry--" He went on talking but Mr. John +Boler heard no more. His heart gave a wild bound of delight. "It" had +given him his revenge. He would let the young woman stay in the hotel +free of charge as long as old Winkle was in the house if only she would +weep and sob pretty steadily. "'Johnnie,' by gad," thought he, resenting +this new indignity to his name. "By George, what luck!" And then he went +about his duties with a new spring in his always elastic step. At the +lunch hour the following day he glanced into the dining-room, and sure +enough, there sat the occupant of 96, and her eyes were swollen and red. +At almost any other time this would have disturbed John Boler, but now +it was a deep delight to him. + +"Had a spat with her lover, no doubt," speculated he, "and, by Jove! it +came at a lucky time for me. I'd pay her lover to keep up the row for +three weeks if I could get at him. 'Weak stomach,' 'Johnnie,' indeed!" +And he went back to the office rubbing his hands in a satisfied way, +thinking that old Winkle would be afraid to go to his room that night, +and that his sleep would be broken by visions of a weeping woman next +door, even if she did not keep him awake half the time sobbing because +Ralph had called her a mean thing or a proud stuck-up flirt, and hinted +darkly that she was in love with his rival. + +Matters had gone on in this way for nearly a week and Mr. Winkle had +fretted and fumed and asked for another room two or three times, but +Mr. Boler told him that the house was full and that there wasn't another +room fit to offer him anyhow. He said that he would change the young +lady's room as soon as he could, but he expected her to leave every day. +She went out a good deal and wrote a large number of letters, and +he felt sure she was going to remain only a day or two longer. He +apologized and explained and planned, and then he would chuckle to +himself the moment "old Winkle's" back was turned to think how "_It_" +had succeeded in getting him even with the old reprobate without the +least overt act on his part. + +But the eighth morning Mr. Winkle rebelled outright. He said that he +would wring the girl's worthless neck if he could get at her, but he +could not and would not bear her sobs any longer. The night before they +had been worse than ever and he had not slept a wink all night long. At +last Mr. Boler promised that he would transfer the girl to another room +that very afternoon if she did not leave, and the old man softened at +once and said if she could not afford to pay for any other room he would +pay the difference and she need never know it. + +John Boler was not mercenary, but this offer gave him keen delight. +For "old Winkle" would have to buy his relief after all. He thought how +willingly a certain infant of his memory would have paid for rest +and quiet too when it was helpless clay in the hands of certain old +imbeciles he knew of. + +At 2 p.m. he told Front to go up to 96 and tell the young lady that he +now had a better room for her that would cost her no more than the one +she now occupied, and to change her and her belongings to 342 forthwith. +In five minutes Front came back as white as a cloth and said that the +young lady's door was unlocked, that there were a number of letters on +the table and that she was dead. + +Mr. John Boler dashed from behind the desk across the street and was +back in an incredibly short space of time, dragging behind him the +dignified and wealthy physician whose office faced the hotel. + +At this stage of the proceedings he cautioned the employees not to say +a word about the matter on pain of instant dismissal. They one and all +promised, and then proceeded to tell the first reporter who dropped in +that a young lady had committed suicide upstairs and that she had +cried out loud for a week. They gave a full description of her and her +effects, all of which appeared in the 5 o'clock edition of the paper, +duly headlined with her name and certain gratuitous speculations in +regard to her motive for self-destruction. In these it was darkly hinted +that she was no better than she should be, but now that she was dead +"we" (the immaculate young gentlemen of the press) felt disposed to draw +a veil of charity over her past and say with the law that her suicide +proved her insanity, and that her mental condition might also account +for her past frailties. + +While these generous young gentlemen were penning their reports the +doctor and Mr. John Boler worked over the poor helpless body of the +unconscious girl in the dark little room upstairs. Between times they +read the letters on the table and learned the old, old story--not of +crime, but of misfortune. No work had offered, and she must work or +starve--or sell the only value she possessed in the sight of men. One or +two of the answers to her advertisement had boldly hinted at this, +and when her little stock of money had run out and the little stock of +misfortune had swelled into a mountain, and the little pile of insults +had increased until she felt that she could endure life no longer, she +had concluded to brave another world where she was taught to believe a +loving Father awaited her because she had been good and true and pure to +the last in spite of storms and disappointments and temptations. So she +made the wild leap in the dark, confident that the hereafter could +hold nothing worse, and believing sincerely that it must hold +something better for Her and her kind, even if that better were only +forgetfulness. + +Up to this point her story was that of thousands of helpless girls who +face the unknown dangers of a great city with the confidence of youth, +and that ill training and ignorance of the world which is supposed to be +a part of the charm of young womanhood. She had not registered her real +name, it is true; but this was because she intended to advertise for +work and have the replies sent to the hotel, and somehow she thought +that it would be easier for her to do that over a name less sacred to +her than her mother's, which was also her own. So instead of registering +as Fannie Ellis Worth of Atlanta, she had written "Miss Kate Jarvis" and +had given no address whatever. This latter fact told strongly against +her with the reporters. They located her in a certain house on +Thirty-first Street and "interviewed" the madam, who gave them a picture +of a girl who had once been there, and a cut of this picture appeared +in two of the morning papers with the fuller account of the suicide. A +beautiful moral was appended to this history of the girl's life +"which had now come to its appropriate ending." But when one of these +enterprising young gentlemen of the press called to get the details of +the funeral for his paper, he was shocked to learn that the young lady +was not dead after all, and that she was now in a fair way to recover. +He was still further disgusted when neither Mr. Boler nor the attending +physician would submit to an interview and declined to allow him to send +his card to the girl's room. + +Then and there he made up his mind that if he had to rewrite that +two-column report to fit the new developments in the case, he would, as +he expressed it, make John Boler and pompous Dr. Ralston wish that they +had never been bom. Incident to this undertaking, he would darkly hint +at a number of things in regard to the girl herself and their relations +with her. This was not at all to make her wish that she had never been +born; but if it should serve that purpose, the young gentleman did not +feel that he would be in the least to blame--if, indeed, he gave the +matter a thought at all, which he very likely did not. + +The article he wrote was certainly very "wide awake" and surprised even +himself in its ingenuity of conjecture as to the motive which could +prompt two such men as John Boler, proprietor of the Boler House, and +Dr. Ralston, "whose reputation had heretofore been above suspicion, to +place themselves in so unenviable, not to say dangerous, a position." +He suggested that although the young woman had taken her case out of +the jurisdiction of the coroner by not actually dying, this fact did +not relieve the affair of certain features which demanded the prompt +attention of the police court. The matter was perfectly clear. Here was +a young woman who had attempted to relieve herself, by rapid means, of +the life which all the social and financial conditions which surrounded +her had combined to take by a slower and more painful process. If she +had succeeded, the law held that she was of unsound mind--that she was, +in short, a lunatic--and treated her case accordingly; but, on the other +hand, if she failed, or if, as in this instance, her effort to place +herself beyond want and pain was thwarted by others, then the law was +equally sure that she was _not_ a lunatic at all, but that she was a +criminal, and that it was the plain duty of the police judge to see +that she was put with those of her class--the enemies and outcasts of +society. + +It was also quite clear that any one who aided, abetted, or shielded a +criminal was _particeps criminis,_ and that unless Mr. John Boler and +Dr. Ralston turned the young offender over to the police at once, there +was a virtuous young reporter on the _Daily Screamer_ who intended to +know the reason why. + +It was this article in the _Screamer_ which first made Mr. Winkle aware +of the condition of affairs in the room adjoining his own. He had been +absent from the hotel for some hours, and had, therefore, known nothing +of the sad happenings so near him. He dashed down into the office with +the paper in his hand and asked for Mr. Boler; but that gentleman was +not visible. It was said that he was in consultation with Dr. Ralston +at the office of the latter, whereupon Mr. Winkle re-read the entire +article aloud to the imperturbable clerk and expressed himself as under +the impression that something was the matter with the law, or else that +a certain reporter for the _Screamer_ was the most dangerous lunatic +at present outside of the legislature. The clerk smiled. A young man +leaning against the desk made a note on a tablet, and then asked Mr. +Winkle what he knew of the case and to state his objections to the law, +first saying _which_ law he so vigorously disapproved. The clerk winked +at Mr. Winkle, but Mr. Winkle either did not see, or else did not regard +the purport of the demonstration, and proceeded to express himself with +a good deal of emphasis in regard to a condition of affairs which made +it possible to elect as lawmakers men capable of framing such idiotic +measures and employing on newspapers others who upheld the enactment. +But before he had gone far in these strictures on public affairs as now +administered he espied John Boler and followed him hastily upstairs. + +That afternoon Mr. Winkle almost fell from his chair when he saw the +evening edition of the _Screamer_ with a three-column "interview" with +himself. It was headed, "_Rank Socialism at the Boler House. A Close +Friend of the Offending Landlord Lets the Cat out of the Bag. A +Dangerous Nest of Law Breakers. John Boler and Dr. Ralston still +Defiant. Backed by a Man Who Ought to Know Better. Shameless Confession +of one of the Arch Conspirators. The Mask torn from Old Silas Winkle Who +Roomed Next to the Would-be Suicide. Will the Police Act Now?_" + +When Mr. Winkle read the article appended to these startling headlines, +he descended hastily to the office floor and proceeded to make some +remarks which it would be safe to assert would not be repeated by any +Sunday-school superintendent--in the presence of his class--in the +confines of the State of New York. John Boler was present at the time +and whispered aside to Mr. Winkle that a reporter for the _Screamer_ and +five others from as many different papers were within hearing, +whereupon Mr. Winkle became more and more excited, and talked with great +volubility to each and every one of the young men as they gathered about +him. "_Adds Blasphemy to His Other Crimes_," wrote one of them as his +headline, and then John Boler interfered. + +"Look here, boys," said he pleasantly, but with a ring of determination +in his voice, "you just let Mr. Winkle alone. This sort of thing is all +new to him, and he had no more to do with that girl than if his room +had been in Texas." (The reporters winked at each other and one of them +wrote, _Connived at by the Proprietor_.) "I put her in the room next to +his. _I_ helped the doctor to resuscitate her. _I_ positively refuse to +give you her real name and present address, although I know both, and +Mr. Winkle does not, and if the police court has any use for me it knows +where to find me. Have a cigar?" Each reporter took a weed, and three of +them went to the office of Dr. Ralston to complete their records as soon +as possible. + +"I'm sorry all this has happened to you in my house, Mr. Winkle," said +John Boler, as they stood alone for a moment. "It is partly my fault, +too," he added, in a sudden burst of contrition. "It" had carried his +revenge further than he had intended. He knew how the old man's sudden +outbreak of righteous indignation would go against him in the newspaper +reports that would follow, and John Boler was kind-hearted as well as +fearless. + +"Good Lord, don't you worry about me, Johnnie!" said the old man, +craning his neck to watch the retreating forms from the window. "But +those young devils have gone over to the doctor's office and they'll +bully him into telling where the girl is, and then they'll bully the +police into dragging her into court yet. Dear me, dear me!" + +"Now, don't you be scared about that, Mr. Winkle. The doctor and I have +made up our minds to fight this thing out. We've found out all about the +girl and that it was simply a case of utter despair. It was a question +of death by slow or by quick means. Society, law, prescribed the slow +method, and the girl herself chose the rapid one. Well, now, as long as +she was to be the sufferer in either case, it strikes me that she had +about as good a right to a voice in the matter as the rest of us. Dr. +Ralston and I checkmated her. (I can't afford to have that kind of thing +happen in the hotel, of course.) But, by gad, we're not going to let +them make a criminal of her. All the circumstances combined to do that +before and she chose death. Well, we stopped her efforts in that line +too, and now the court proposes to put the finishing touches on +society's other inhumanities and send her up for it. Why, good God, man, +just look at it! In substance that girl said, 'I'll die before I'll be +forced into association with criminals,' and the court says, 'You shall +do nothing of the kind. Science shall doctor you up and we will _send_ +you up. Despair is a crime.' That girl tried every way she knew of to +live right. She failed. No work that she could do came her way. Well, +now, will you just tell me what she was to do? You know what any man on +God's earth would do if _he_ had been situated that way and _could_ have +sold his virtue--in the sense we use virtue for women. Well, some women +are not built that way. They prefer to die. Life don't mean enough of +happiness to them to pay for the rest of it--life as it is, I mean. +Well, since women don't have anything to say about what the laws and +social conditions shall be, it strikes me that the situation is a trifle +arbitrary, to put it mildly. We make laws for and demands upon women +that no man on earth would think of complying with, and then we tell 'em +they sha'n't even die to get away from the conditions we impose and +about which they are not allowed a word to say. To tell you the bald +truth _I'm_ ashamed of it. So when we learned that girl's story we just +made up our minds that since we had taken the liberty to keep her from +getting out of the world by a shorter cut than the one usually +prescribed in such cases--starvation--that we'd just take the additional +liberty of keeping her from being hounded to insanity and made a +criminal of by legal verdict." + +Mr. Winkle gave a snort that startled John Boler, for he had been +running on half to himself during the last of his talk and had almost +forgotten that the old man was present. When he heard the explosion he +mistook its meaning and his conscience gave him another smart twinge. + +"Yes, I'm sorry, _very_ sorry, Mr. Winkle, that this trouble has come to +you in my house, but who could have foreseen that--a--that is to say--" + +"Trouble to _me?_" exclaimed Mr. Winkle. "Trouble to _me?_ Who's said +anything about any trouble to me? Do you suppose I care what those young +scamps say about me in the papers? Got to make a living, haven't they? +Well, society doesn't object to their making a living by taking what +does not belong to 'em, if it happens to be a man's reputation or a +woman's chance to ever make an honest living again. Little thefts like +that don't count That is not a crime; but dear me, Johnnie, do you +suppose I care a tinker's dam about that, so for as _I_ go? God bless my +soul, if the dear boys can sell their three columns of rot about me, and +it will keep them off the heels of some poor devil that it might ruin, +why, I'm satisfied. All I've got to say to you is, if they arrest +you I'll go bail, and if they fine you I'll pay it, and if they jail +you--hang it, Johnnie, I'll serve your term, that's all." + +Mr. Boler laughed. "My punishment shall all be vicarious then, hey? Good +idea, only it won't work in every-day life. The law doesn't let other +people serve out your term. But I'm just as much obliged, and--and--to +tell you the truth, Mr. Winkle, I'm--that is to say, I hope you will +forgive me--the fact is, I forgive you freely for the part you took in +helping to addle such brains as I had when I was a child. There is my +hand. 'It' went a little too far this time, and--" + +Mr. Winkle took off his glasses and polished them carefully. Then he +placed them astride his nose and gazed thoughtfully at his old friend's +son for fully a minute before he said a word. Finally he took the +extended hand, shook it solemnly, and walked slowly away, wondering to +himself if it could be possible that hard-headed old John Boler's son +was touched a little in the brain. Mr. Boler noticed his perplexed +expression and laughed merrily to himself as he started toward the +elevator. Before he reached it he turned and beckoned to Mr. Winkle to +follow him. On the third floor they were joined by Dr. Ralston. + +"She is so much better now, Mr. Winkle," explained the genial hotel man, +"and you are an older man than either the doctor or I, so I thought-- It +just struck me that she might feel-- That you might like-- Oh, damn it, +would you like to go up to see her? We are going now. A clergyman has +called, and if she wants to see him we shall not stay but a minute; but +as there is no woman about, as she is so alone, I thought perhaps she +might like to have an older man come with us, for she seems to be a very +sensitive girl. She has been silent about herself so far; but she is +better now, and we want to find out what work she can do, and have a +place ready for her when she is able to get about. Perhaps she will talk +more freely to you." + +The old gentleman looked perplexed, but made no reply until they +were out of the elevator. Then he took Mr. Boler by the arm and said +helplessly, "I--I am a bachelor, you know, Johnnie, and--" + +"No!" laughed Mr. Boler. "Well, confound it, you don't look it. Anybody +would take you for the proud father of a large brood. She will think you +are and it may help her. Come on." + +The old gentleman entered the darkened room last and sat down silently +in the deepest shadow. The doctor stepped to the bed and spoke in a low +tone. A white face on the pillow turned slowly, so that the only band of +light that reached in from the open door fell full upon it. Mr. Winkle +shuddered as he saw for the first time the delicate, pallid, hopeless +face. + +"A priest?" she said feebly, in answer to the doctor. "Oh, no. Why +should I want to see a priest? You've had your way. You've brought me +back to battle with a world wherein I only now acknowledged my defeat." +Her voice trembled with weakness and emotion, but she was looking +steadily at the doctor with great wide eyes, in which there burnt the +intensity of mental suffering and a determination to free her mind even +at the risk of losing the good-will of those who had intended to be kind +to her. "A priest! What could he do? _This_ life is what I fear. His +mission is to deal with other worlds--of which I know already what he +does--and that is _nothing_. Of this life I know, alas! too much. Far +more than he. He cannot help me, for I could tell him much he _cannot_ +know, of suffering and fortitude and hope laid low at last, without a +refuge even in cloistered walls. I know what he would say. His voice +would tremble and he would offer sympathy and good advice--and, maybe, +alms. These are not what I want or need. I am not very old--just +twenty-two--but I have thought and thought until my brain is tired, and +what good could it do for him to sit beside me here and say in gentle +tones that it is very sad? No doubt that he would tell me, too, how +wicked I have been that I should choose to die by my own hand when life +had failed me." + +She smiled a little, and her wan face lit from within was beautiful +still in spite of its pallor. The doctor murmured something about +natural sympathy, and Mr. Boler remarked that men who were fortunate +would gladly help those who were in distress if only they knew in time. +She did not appear to heed them, but presently went on as though her +mind were on the clergymen below waiting to see her. + +"To feel that it is sad is only human; but what is to be done? That is +the question now. What is to be done for suffering in _this_ world? It +is life that is hard to bear, not death. Sympathy with the unfortunate +is good. Kind words and gentle tones as your priest recounts their woes +are touching. Yes, and when they are drawn to fit the truth would melt +a heart of stone; but unless action wings the sympathy and dries the +tears, the object of his tenderness is in no wise bettered--indeed, is +injured. Why? Because he lulls to sleep man's conscience and thereby +gives relief from pangs that otherwise had found an outlet through an +open purse. And when I say an open purse I do not speak of charity, that +double blight which kills the self-respect in its recipient and numbs +the conscience of the 'benevolent' man who grasps the utmost penny +_here_ that he may give with ostentation _there_, wounding the many that +he may heal the few. All this was safe enough, no doubt, while Poverty +was ignorant, for ignorance is helpless always; but now--" There was +a pause. She raised her head a little from the pillow and a frightened +look crept into her eyes--"but now the poor are not so ignorant that +it will long be safe to play at cross purposes with suffering made too +intelligent to drink in patient faith the bitter draughts of life and +wait the crown of gold he promises hereafter--and wears, meanwhile, +himself. A _little_ joy on earth, they think, will not bedim the lustre +of a life that is to come--if such there be. You see I've thought a +little in these wretched days and months just past." She was silent +again for a moment. A bitter smile crossed her face and vanished. The +doctor offered her a powder which she swallowed without a word. John +Boler stepped to the table and poured out a glass of wine, but when he +held it toward her she shook her head and closed her eyes a moment. Then +she spoke again as if no break had checked her thought. "Oh, no; I +do not care to see your priest. The poor no longer fail to note his +willingness to risk the needle's eye with camel's back piled high with +worldly gain. If he may enter thus, why may not they with simpler train +and fewer trappings? The poor are asking this to-day of prince and +priest alike. No answer comes from either. Evasion does not satisfy. +I ask, but no one answers. The day once was when silence passed for +wisdom. That day is gone. To-day we are asking why? and why? and why? no +longer, when? And so the old reply, 'hereafter,' does not fit the query. +Why, not when, is what we urge to-day, and your replies must change to +fit the newer, nearer question. When I say _your_ replies, I do not mean +you, doctor, nor your friend. You two meant kindly by me. Yes, I know. +I am not claiming that you are at fault, nor they--the fortunate--the +prince and priest. I understand. Blind nature took her course and trod +beneath her cruel feet the millions who were born too weak to struggle +with the foes they found within themselves and in their stronger +brothers. I know, I know." + +She lay back on the pillow and closed her eyes wearily. Mr. Winkle drew +near and stood behind the doctor's chair, still keeping in the shadow, +but watching her pale face with an intensity born of a simple nature +easy to stir and quick to resolve. The doctor touched her pulse with a +light finger and gravely nodded his head as he glanced at his watch. Her +heavy eyelids did not lift but her voice broke the silence again. There +was a cadence in it that gave a solemn thrill to the three men as they +listened, the doctor watching with professional interest the effect of +the powder he had given; the other two waited, expecting they knew not +what. + +"The ignorance and cruelty of all the past, the superstitious fears, +the cunning prophecies, the greeds and needs of men, joined hands and +marched triumphant. They did not halt to ask the fallen what had borne +them down. They did not silence bugle blasts of joy where new-made +graves were thick. No silken flag was lowered to warm to life the +shivering forms of comrades overcome and fallen by the way. The strong +marched on and called themselves the brave. Sometimes they were. But +other times the bravest had gone down, plucked at, perchance, by wife or +child or friend whose sorrow or distress reached out and twined itself +about the strong but tender heart and held it back until the foot lost +step, and in the end the eye lost sight of those who only now had kept +him company." + +She lifted her small white hand and pointed as if to a distant +battlefield, but her eyes remained closed. The doctor glanced uneasily +at his watch and took her other wrist in his fingers again. + +"The next battalion trampled him. The priest bent low and whispered +'over there, hereafter,' and slipped the treasure of the fallen hero +beneath his ample robe to swell the coffers of the church, since dead +men need no treasures." + +Her voice was infinitely sad but she laughed a little and opened +her eyes. They fixed themselves upon the silvered head of Mr. Winkle +standing behind the doctor's chair. + +"Perhaps I shock you. I do not mean to, but I have thought and thought +these last few wretched months, and looking at the battlefields of life +backward through all the ages, I thought I saw at night, in camp, the +priest and conqueror meet beside the campfire and council for the next +day's march. I thought I heard the monarch say, 'I go before and cleave +my way. You follow me and gather up two things--the spoils I miss and +all the arrows of awakened scorn and wrath embedded in the breasts of +those of our own ranks who fall or are borne down, lest they arise and +overtake us while we sleep and venge themselves on us. Tell them to +wait. Their time will come. Tell them _I_ clear the way for them, and +_you_ forgive a hatred which you see is growing up within their wicked +breasts. Quiet, soothe, and shame them into peace. Assure them that +_hereafter_ they, not we, shall have the better part. Gain time. +Lay blame to me if need be; but always counsel patience, waiting, +acquiescence, peace, submission to the will of God--_your will and +mine_. Your task is easy. No danger lies therein. I take the risk and +share with you the glory and the gain.' I heard the priest disclaim all +greed of gain and go to do his part as loyal subject and as holy man. +I saw all this and more before I took the last resolve you balked. You +meant it kindly, doctor, yes, I know, but I am very tired and what is +there ahead for me, or such as I, on battlefields like these?" + +No one ventured a reply. She closed her eyes and waited. The doctor took +another powder from his case and held it above her lips. She smiled and +swallowed it. + +"We take our powders very docilely," she said, with a bitter little +laugh as the wine-glass left her hand and Mr. Boler's finger touched her +own. He noticed that hers was very cold. + +"They used to make us sleep in the good old days of priest and monarch, +but our nerves are wrong just now. Our powders only make us think the +more and have strange visions." + +Dr. Ralston glanced at Mr. Boler and nodded his head mysteriously. The +powder was beginning to work, he thought, for she had reverted to the +old vision, and talked as if she were in a dream. "That way it was, +another way it is, and still another will be," she was saying. "To-day +the honest poor, the hampered weak, are defeated, dazed, and some of us +are hopeless. Others there are who cling to hope and life and brood on +vengeance. That is your danger, gentlemen, for days that are to come. +You will have to change your powders. The old prescriptions do not make +us sleep. We think, and think, and think. We strain our nerves and break +our hearts, for what? A life as cold and colorless and sad as death +itself--to some of us far sadder--and yet you will not even let us die. +Again we ask you, why? There is no place on earth for such as we, unless +we will be criminals. That is the hinge whereon the future turns. How +many will prefer the crime to want? What dangers lie behind the door +that now is swinging open? Intelligence has taught us scorn for such +a grovelling lot, has multiplied our needs, and turned the knife of +suffering in quivering wounds no longer deadened by the anaesthetics of +ignorant content with life or superstitious fear of death. The door is +swinging on the hinge. The future has to face creatures the past has +made like demons. Some, like myself, behind the door, who do not love +mere life, will turn the sharpened dagger on themselves. But there are +others--" + +Her voice sank. The three men thought that she had fallen asleep at +last. The doctor drew a long satisfied breath and consulted his watch +for the fourth time, making a mental note for future use in giving the +drug whose action he was watching. He started and frowned, therefore, +when her voice broke the silence again. + +"Others there are, in spite of pain and anguish, in spite of woe and +fear, who cling to life--who read in eyes they worship the pangs of +hunger, cold, and mental agony. Where will their vengeance go? Who +knows?" + +She opened her great eyes and looked first at one and then at another, +and repeated, "Who knows?" + +Again there was no reply. After a long pause Mr. Winkle said gently: + +"There is a place in life for girls like you. I shall charge myself +with it. You shall find work and joy yet, my child. Now go to sleep. Be +quiet. We have let you talk too long. Stop thinking sadly now. You think +too much. You _think_ too much." + +She closed her eyes quickly and there was a tightening of the lips that +left them paler than before. Then a tear rolled slowly down her temple. +Before it reached the pillow the doctor bent forward and dried it softly +with his silk handkerchief. She opened her eyes wide at the touch. "'Be +quiet?'" she repeated, "'stop thinking?' Oh, yes; _I_ will be quiet, but +the rest, the others? Those with whom you do not charge yourself, who +find no work, no joy? Will _they_ be quiet, will they stop thinking? Oh, +yes; I can be quiet, very quiet, but the rest, the rest? The others who +think too much--_all, all?_" + +There was a wild look in her dry eyes. The doctor touched her wrist +again and said softly to the men beside him, "It is working now. She +will sleep. But the shock of all her trouble has left her mind unhinged, +poor child. 'The rest? the others?' _We_ cannot care for all the +countless poor. Her brain is surely touched, poor child, poor child. How +can we tell whether the others will stop thinking, or how, or when? Her +mind was wandering, and now she sleeps, poor child. Come out. She is +best alone." + +They closed the door gently behind them and stood a moment in awkward +silence outside, each one afraid to speak and yet ashamed of his own +tender helplessness. At last Mr. Winkle looking steadily in the crown of +his hat, said huskily, "By gad, boys, there is something rotten in the +state of Denmark." They all three laughed with an effort, but kept their +eyes averted. + +"It is a rat in the wainscoting of the storeroom," said John Boler, with +a desperate attempt to regain his old manner and tone, "and I've got +to go and look after it or there'll be the devil to pay with the Boler +House." And he ran down the stairs three steps at a time heartily +ashamed of his own remark, but determined not to allow the tears to show +themselves either in his eyes or voice, and feeling that his only safety +was in flight. + +But Mr. Winkle had not stood silently behind the doctor's chair all that +time for nothing, and if his nature was somewhat light, and if he had +taken life so far as something of a jest, he was by no means without +a heart. He did not now trouble himself very greatly about the tangled +problems of existence, but he felt quite equal to dealing with any given +case effectively and on short notice. With systems he was helpless, +with individuals he could deal promptly. Therefore he, in common with +the doctor and Mr. Boler, and, indeed, with most of us, occupied himself +with the girl he saw suffering and in need. + +When she had cried out, "But the rest, the others, what of them?" he had +said nothing, because he had nothing to say. He was vaguely aware that +when the smallpox broke out on one of Dr. Ralston's patients that astute +practitioner did not essay to treat each individual pustule separately +as the whole of the disease and so devote his entire skill and mind to +each in turn until it was cured. But then he could not undertake to cure +the whole human race of its various social ailments any more than Dr. +Ralston could hope to look after all of its physical pains. So Mr. +Winkle took this one little social pustule upstairs as his particular +charge, and in his own peculiar way went about securing better +conditions for her, leaving the "others who think too much" to somebody +else, or to fate, as the case might be. Therefore, when Mr. Winkle +reached the street door and met an officer of the law who had come +prepared to learn the whereabouts of the would-be suicide or else take +Mr. John Boler and Dr. Ralston into custody, the old gentleman made up +his mind to begin his part in the future proceedings without further +delay. + +Unknown to Mr. Winkle himself, literature had lost a great novelist when +he had gone into the mercantile business, and the surprises which he now +sprang upon the policeman were no less astonishing and interesting to +himself than they were to that astute guardian of the public morals. + +"Want to know where she is, do you? Well, don't worry Johnnie Boler any +more. They've already got him so his mind is a little affected. I'll +tell you all about that girl. Her name is Estelle Morris. She worked for +me for nine years as a nursery governess. Last month my youngest child +died, and it upset Estelle so that she has been out of her head ever +since. I thought if I'd bring her to the city maybe she might get over +it, but she didn't, and the doctor gave her some stuff and she took +a double dose by mistake, and all the row came from that and the +long tongues of the servants, pieced out by the long pencils of the +reporters. See!" + +"Is that so?" exclaimed the officer. "Where is she now?" + +Mr. Winkle had not thought of that, and he did not know exactly what to +say; but he agreed to produce her in court on the following day if so +ordered, and there the matter dropped for the moment. + +That evening there appeared in a paper this "want:" "A good-looking +young woman who is willing to lie like a pirate for the space of +one hour for the sum of $50. May have to go to court." The number of +handsome girls who were anxious to lend the activity of their tongues +for the purpose named and the amount stipulated was quite wonderful. One +particularly bright young miss remarked that she had been in training +for just that position for years. She was confidential correspondent for +a broker. Mr. Winkle accepted her on the spot. + +"Now," said he, "look solemn and sad. That is right. You do it first +rate. Whatever I tell about you you are to stick to. Understand that?" + +"Perfectly. Years of practice," she responded, with entire simplicity +and without a suspicion of humor. + +"Your name is Estelle Morris, and you have been the governess of my +children for nine years. How old are you?" + +"Nineteen," said Estelle Morris demurely. + +"Good gracious, girl, what could you teach at ten years of age? You've +got to be older. Take the curl out of your hair in front and put on a +bonnet with strings. I heard my niece say that made her look ten years +older. Mind you, you are not a day under twenty-six. Not a day." + +"All right," said Estelle Morris thoughtfully. + +"You are to look sick, too, and--" + +"Oh, I can fix _that_ easy enough. I'll--" + +"Well, then fix it and come back here at exactly two o'clock this +afternoon." + +At the appointed hour, Mr. Winkle met Miss Estelle Morris and took her +with great dignity and care to the Boler House, where he was joined +by another gentleman--an officer of the law--and the three started out +together. + +"The examination was strictly private in deference to the wishes of the +parties first implicated, John Boler and Dr. Ralston, and because it is +now believed that the girl is more sinned against than sinning," wrote +the reporter for the morning rival of the _Screamer_. "It is the object +of justice to help the erring to start anew in life wherever that line +of action is consonant with the stern necessities of the blind goddess. +Neither of the male accomplices appeared in the case, but Mr. +Silas Winkle--whose name has figured somewhat conspicuously in the +matter--produced the principal, who, it must be confessed, is pretty +enough to account for all the chivalry which has been displayed in +her behalf. She confessed to twenty-six years of single wretchedness, +although she could easily pass for a year or two younger. It would +appear that she had lived in Mr. Winkle's family for nine years as +governess to his children and came to the city with him about two weeks +ago. The justice accepted this explanation of the relations existing +between them, and that there was no attempt at suicide at all, but only +an accidental overdose of a remedy prescribed by Dr. Ralston, which +explained satisfactorily the doctor's connection with the unsavory +case, and places him once more in the honorable position from which this +unfortunate affair so nearly hurled him. In short, the justice said in +substance, 'not guilty, and don't do it any more.' The young woman bowed +modestly, and Silas Winkle led her from the court-room a sadder, and, +let us hope, a wiser woman. Such as she must have much to live for. Many +a man has braved death for a face less lovely than hers. This ends the +'Boler House Mystery,' which, after all, turns out to be only a tempest +in a teapot, with a respectable father of a family and his children's +governess for _dramatis persono_ and a fresh young reporter on a certain +sensational morning contemporary as general misinformer of the public +as usual." This was headlined, "_Exploded--Another Fake by Our Esteemed +Contemporary_." + +That night John Boler rubbed his eyes when he read the report. "I +thought you were a bachelor, Mr. Winkle," said he, "and here you produce +in court a governess--" + +"I am," said Mr. Winkle, laughing, and then he showed his "want" +advertisement. "That is the whole case, Johnnie, my boy, but it is all +over now. Don't you worry; it might go to your head again. You saved the +girl and I saved you, and it only cost me $50. I'd pay that any time +to get ahead of the _Screamer_, and I rather think I salted that +enterprising sheet down this time, don't you? But what is to become of +that girl?" added he, without waiting for a reply to his first question. +"You've taken the liberty to save her life, which she had decided she +did not want under existing circumstances. Has she simply got to go over +the same thing again? I told her that I'd look after her, but I don't +see how in thunder I'm going to do it. She won't take money from me and +_I've_ got nothing for her to do. Is there nothing ahead of her but a +coffin or a police court?" + +"For this individual girl, yes. Dr. Ralston has already secured work +for her; but for all the thou-sands of her kind--" John Boler's voice +trembled a little and he stopped speaking to hide it. He in common with +most men was heartily ashamed of his better nature. + +"For all the thousands of her kind," broke in Mr. Winkle, "there are +just exactly three roads open--starvation, suicide, or shame, with the +courts, the legislature, and the newspapers on the side of the latter. +I just tell you, Johnnie, it makes my blood boil. I--I don't see any way +out of it--none at all. That is the worst of it." + +"I do," said Mr. Boler. + +"_You do!_" exclaimed Mr. Winkle excitedly, and then looked hard at his +old friend's son to see if he had gone crazy again. + +"Yes, I do. Those same newspapers you are so down on will do it. They're +bound to. The boys go wrong sometimes, as they did in this case; but +that only makes sensible people indignant, and, after all, it called +attention to the law that makes such things possible. _More light on +the laws_. That's the first thing we want, and no matter which side of +a question the papers take, we are bound to get that in the long run. +Silence is the worst danger. We get pretty mad at the boys if they write +what we don't like, but that isn't half so dangerous as if they didn't +write at all. See?" + +Mr. Winkle turned slowly away and shook his head as he murmured to +himself: "Who would have believed that old John Boler would have been +the father of a lunatic? Dear me, dear me. I'm going back to Meadville +before I get touched in the head myself." And he started to his room to +pack his valise. John Boler followed him to the elevator. + +"I don't blame you for feeling pretty mad about all the stuff they put +in the _Screamer_ about you; but--oh, the boys _mean_ all right--" + +"So does the devil," broke in the old man. But Mr. Boler gave no +evidence of noticing the interruption nor of observing the irascibility +of his guest. + +"The trouble is with the system," he went on, entering the elevator +after Mr. Winkle. "Why, just look at it, man. What I say or do, if it is +of a public nature, I'm responsible for _to_ the public. What you write +you put your name to; but it's a pretty big temptation to a young fellow +who knows he has got the swing in a newspaper and doesn't have to sign +his name to what he says, to make an effort to 'scoop' his rivals at +whatever cost. The boys don't mean any harm, but irresponsible power is +a mighty dangerous weapon to handle. Not many older men can be trusted +to use it wisely. Then why should we expect it of those young fellows +who don't know yet any of the deeper meanings of life? Great Scott, man! +_I_ think they do pretty well under the circumstances. I'm afraid I'd do +worse." + +Mr. Winkle stroked his chin reflectively. + +"No doubt, no doubt," he said abstractedly, as they stepped out of the +elevator. + +John Boler looked at him for a brief space of time to see if he had +intended the thrust and then went on: + +"That girl's life or death just meant an item to the boys, and it didn't +mean much more to you or me until--until we stood and heard her talk and +saw her suffer, and were made personally uncomfortable by it. Yet we are +old enough to know all about it for her and others. We _do_ know it, and +go right along as if we didn't. We are a pretty bad lot, don't you think +so?" + +Silas Winkle unlocked his door before he spoke. Then he turned to his +old friend's son and shook his hand warmly. + +"Good-bye," he said, looking at him steadily. "Good-bye, Johnnie. I see +it only comes on you at odd spells. Come up to Meadville for a while +and I think you will get over it altogether. Your father was the +clearest-headed man I ever saw and you seem to have lucid intervals. +Those last remarks of yours were worthy of your father, my boy," and the +old man patted him softly on the back. + +John Boler whistled all the way downstairs. Then he laughed. + +"I wonder if old Winkle really does think I am off my base," said he, +as he took down his hat. "I suppose we are all more or less crazy. He +thinks I am and I know he is. It is a crazy world. Only lunatics could +plan or conduct it on its present lines." And he laughed again and then +sighed and passed out into the human stream on Broadway. + + + + +THE TIME LOCK OF OUR ANCESTORS. + +_"Visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third +and fourth generation._"--Bible. + + +"Don't be so hard on yourself, Nellie. I am sure it can be no great +wrong you have done. Girls like you are too apt to be morbid. No doubt +we all do it, whatever it is. I'm sure I shall not blame you when you +tell me. Perhaps I shall say you are quite right--that is, if there is +any right and wrong to it, and provided I know which is which, after I +hear the whole story--as most likely I shall not. Right--" + +And here the elder woman smiled a little satirically, and looked out +of the window with a far-away gaze, as if she were retravelling through +vast spaces of time and experience far beyond anything her friend could +comprehend. + +The evening shadows had gathered, and cast, as they will, a spell of +gravity and exchange of confidences over the two. + +Presently the older woman began speaking again: + +"Do you know, Nell, I was always a little surprised that Lord Byron, of +all people, should have put it that way: + + "I know the right, and I approve it too; + Condemn the wrong--and yet the wrong pursue. + +"_The_ right '--why, it is like a woman to say that. As if there were +but one 'right,' and it were dressed in purple and fine linen, and +seated on a throne in sight of the assembled multitude! '_The right._' +indeed! Yes, it sounds like a woman--and a very young woman at that, +Nellie." + +The girl looked with large, troubled, passionate eyes at her friend, and +then broke out into hot, indignant words--words that would have offended +many a woman; but Florence Campbell only laughed, a light, queer little +peal; tipped her chair a trifle farther back, put her daintily slippered +feet on the satin cushion of the low window-seat, and looked at her +friend, through the gathering darkness, from under half-closed eyelids. + +Presently--this woman was always deliberate in her conversation; long +silences were a part of her power in interesting and keeping the full +attention of her listeners--presently she said: + +"Of course you think so. Why shouldn't you? So did I--once. And do you +know, Nellie, that sort of sentiment dies hard--_very_ hard--in a woman. +At your age--" Florence Campbell always spoke as if she were very old, +although to look at her one would say that she was not twenty-eight. + +These delicately formed Dresden-china women often carry their age +with such an easy grace--it sits upon them so lightly--in spite of +ill-health, mental storms, and moral defeats, that while their more +robust sisters grow haggard and worn, and hard of feature and tone, +under weights less terrible and with feelings less intense, they keep +their grace and gentleness of tone in the teeth of every blast. + +"At your age, dear, I would have scorned a woman who talked as I do now; +and more than that, I would have suspected her, as you do not suspect +me, of being a very dangerous and not unlikely a very bad person +indeed--simply from choice. While you--you generous little soul--think +that I am better than I talk." + +She laughed again, and shifted her position as if she were not wholly +comfortable under the troubled gaze of the great eyes she knew were +fastened upon her. + +"You think I am better than my opinions. I know exactly what you tell +yourself about me when you are having it out with yourself upstairs. +Oh, I know! You excuse me for saying this on the theory that it was not +deliberate--was an oversight. You account for that by the belief that I +am not well--my nerves are shaken. You are perfectly certain that _I_ am +all right, no matter what I do, or say, or think." She took her little +friend's soft hand as it twisted nervously a ribbon in her lap, and held +the back of it against her cheek, as she often did. "But just suppose it +were some one else--some other woman, Nellie, you would suspect her +(no doubt quite unfairly) of all the crimes in the statute-books. Oh, I +know, I know, child! I did--at your age--and, sad to relate, _I_ had no +Florence Campbell to soften my judgments on even one of my sex." + +She had grown serious as she talked, and her voice almost trembled. The +instant she recognized this herself, she laughed again, and said gayly: + +"Oh, I was a very severe judge--once--I do assure you, though you may +not think so now." She dropped her voice to a tone of mocking solemnity, +not uncommon with her, and added: "If you won't tell on me, I'll make a +little confession to you, dear;" and she took both of the girl's hands +firmly in her own and waited until the promise was given. + +"I wouldn't have it get out for the world, but the fact is, Nell, I +sometimes strongly suspect that, at your age, I was--a most unmitigated, +self-righteous little prig." + +Nellie's hands gave a disappointed little jerk: but her friend held them +firmly, laughed gayly at her discomfiture--for she recognized fully +that the girl was attuned to tragedy--buried her face in them! for an +instant, and then deliberately kissed in turn each pink little palm--not +omitting her own. Then she dropped those of her friend, and leaned back +against her cushions and sighed. + +Nellie was puzzled and annoyed. She was on the verge of tears. + +"Florence, darling," she said presently, "if I did not know you to be +the best woman in the world, I shouldn't know what to make of your dark +hints, and of--and of you. You are always a riddle to me--a beautiful +riddle, with a good answer, if only I could guess it. You talk like a +fiend, sometimes, and you act like--an angel, always." + +"Give me up. You can't guess me. Fact is, I haven't got any answer," +laughed Florence. + +But the girl went steadily on without seeming to hear her: "Do you know, +there are times when I wonder if it would be possible to be insane and +vicious, mentally and _verbally_, as it were, and perfectly sane and +exaltedly good morally." + +Florence Campbell threw herself back on her cushions and laughed gayly, +albeit a trifle hysterically. "Photograph taken by an experienced +artist!" she exclaimed. "You've hit me! Oh, you've hit me, Nell." Then +sitting suddenly bolt-upright, she looked the girl searchingly in the +face, and said slowly: "Do you know, Nellie, that I am sometimes tempted +to tell the truth? About myself, I mean--and to _you_. Never on any +other subject, nor to anybody else, of course," she added dryly, in +comedy tones, strangely contrasting with the almost tragic accents as +she went on. "But I can't. '_The_ truth!' Why, it is like _the_ right; +I'm sure I don't know what it is; and it has been so long--oh, so +cruelly long--since I told it, by word or action, that I have lost its +very likeness from my mind. I have told lies and acted lies so long--" +Her friend's eyes grew indignant and she began to protest, but Florence +ran on: "I have evaded facts--not only to others, but to myself, +until--until I'd have to swear out a search-warrant and have it served +on my mental belongings to find out myself what I _do_ think or feel or +want on any given subject." + +It was characteristic of the woman to use this flippant method of +expression, even in her most intense moments. + +"I change so, Nell; sometimes suddenly--all in a flash." + +There was a long silence. Then she began again, quite seriously: + +"There is a theory, you know, that we inherit traits and conditions from +our remote ancestors as well as from our immediate ones. I sometimes +fancy that they descend to some people with a Time Lock attachment. A +child is born"--she held out her hands as if a baby lay on them--"he +is like his mother, we will say, gentle, sweet, kind, truthful, for +years--let us say seven. Suddenly the Time Lock turns, and the traits of +his father (modified, of course, by the acquired habits of seven years) +show themselves strongly--take possession, in fact. Another seven years, +and the priggishness of a great-uncle, the stinginess of an aunt, or the +dullness, in books, of a rural grandfather. Then, in keeping with the +next two turns of the Lock, he falls in love with every new face he +sees, marries early and indulges himself recklessly in a large family. +He is an exemplary husband and father, as men go, an ideal business man, +and a general favorite in society." + +She was running on now as if her words had the whip-hand of her. + +"Everybody remarks upon the favorable change since his stupid, priggish +college days. All this time, through every change, he has been honorable +and upright in his dealings with his fellows. Suddenly the Time Lock +of a Thievish Ancestor is turned on; he finds temptation too strong +for even that greatly under-estimated power--the force of habit of +a lifetime--and the trust funds in his keeping disappear with him to +Canada. Everybody is surprised, shocked, pained--and he, no doubt, +more so than any one else. Emotional insanity is offered as a possible +explanation by the charitable; longheaded, calculating, intentional +rascality, by the severe or self-righteous. And he? Well, he is wholly +unable to account for it at all. He _knows_ that he had not lived all +these years as a conscious, self-controlled thief. He _knows_ that the +temptations of his past life had never before taken that particular +form. He _knows_ that the impulse was sudden, blinding, overwhelming; +but he does not know why and how. It was like an awful dream. He seemed +to be powerless to overcome it. The Time Lock had turned without his +knowledge, and in spite of himself. The unknown, unheard-of Thievish +Ancestor took possession, as it were, through force of superior strength +and ability--and then it was his hour. The hereditary shadow on the dial +had come around to him. The great-uncle's hour was past. _He_, no doubt, +was 'turned on' to some other dazed automaton--in Maine or Texas--who +had fallen heir to a drop too much of his blood, and she, poor thing, if +it happened to be a girl this time, forthwith proceeded to fall in love +with her friend's husband--seeing he was the only man at hand at the +time; while the Thievish Ancestor left--in shame and contrition--a +small but light-fingered boy in Georgia, to keep his engagement with +our respectable, highly honored, and heretofore highly honorable man of +affairs in Wall street. The Time Lock of heredity had been set for this +hour, and the machinery of circumstances oiled the wheels and silently +moved the dial." There was absolute silence when Florence Camp-bell's +voice ceased. The heavy curtains made the shadows in the struggling +moonlight deep and solemn. Two great eyes looked out into the darkness +and a shudder passed over her frame. She thought her little friend +had fallen asleep, she lay so still and quiet on the rug at her feet. +Florence sighed, and thought how quickly youth forgot its troubles and +how lightly Care sat on her throne. Then suddenly a passionate sobbing +broke the silence, and two arms, covered with lace and jewels, flung +themselves around the older woman's knees. + +"O my God! Florence; O my God! is there no way to stop the wheels? +Must they go blindly on? Can we _never_ know who or what we shall be +to-morrow? It is awful, Florence, awful; and--it--is _true!_ O God! it +is _true!_" + +Florence Campbell had been very serious when she stopped her little +harangue. There had been a quality in her voice which, while it was not +wholly new to her friend, _would_ have been unknown to many who thought +they knew her well. To them she was a beautiful, fashionable, rather +light woman, with a gay nature, who either did not know, or did not care +to investigate too closely, the career of her husband, to whom she was +devotedly attached. + +She had been quite serious, I say, when she stopped her little +philosophical speculation; but she was greatly surprised at the storm +she had raised in the breast of her little friend. + +Florence bent down quickly, and putting her arms about the girl tried to +raise her up; but she only sobbed the harder, and clung to her friend's +knees as a desperate, frightened creature might cling to its only +refuge. + +"Why, Nellie, little kitten," said the older woman, using a term of +endearment common with her in talking with the girl--"why, Nellie, +little kitten, what in the world is the matter? Did I scare the life out +of you with my Time Locks and my gruesome ancestors?" and she tried to +laugh a little; but the sound of her voice was not altogether pleasant +to the ear. "I'll ring for a light. I had no business to talk such stuff +to you when you were blue and in the dark too. I guess, Nell, that the +Time Lock of _my_ remote ancestor, who was a fool, must have been turned +on me shortly after sundown to-day, don't you think?" And this time her +laugh lacked the note of bitterness it had held before. + +She ran on, still caressing the weeping girl at her feet: + +"Yes, undoubtedly, my Remote Ancestor--the fool--has now moved in. Do +you think you can stand seven years of him, kitten, if you live with +me that long? But you won't. You'll go and marry some horrid man, and I +shall be so jealous that my hair will curl at sight of him." + +But the girl would not laugh. She refused to be cheered, nor would she +have a light. She raised herself until her head rested on her friend's +bosom, and clung to her, sobbing as if her heart would break. Florence +stroked her hair and sat silent for a while, wondering just what had +so shaken the child. She knew full well that it was _not_ what she had +hinted of the darkness and her gruesome story. Presently Nellie drew her +friend's face down, and whispered between her sobs: + +"Darling, I must have had some dreadful ancestor, a wicked--_wicked_ +woman. I--" + +Florence Campbell shrieked with laughter. She felt relieved of--she did +not know what. She had blamed herself for even unconsciously touching +the secret spring of sorrow in the girl's heart. It was a strange +sight, the two women clinging to each other, the one sobbing, the other +laughing, each trying in vain to check the other. + +At last Nellie said, still almost in a whisper: "But, Florence, you do +not know. You do not understand. You are too good to know. It is you +who will scorn and hate me when I tell you. O Florence, Florence, I +can never _dare_ to tell you!" Her friend, still laughing, made +little ejaculations of satirical import as the girl grew more and more +hysterical. + +"O thou wicked wretch!" laughed she. "No doubt you've killed your man, +as they say out West. Oh, dear--oh, dear! Nell, this is really quite +delicious! Did it step on a bug? Or was it a great big spider? And does +it think it ought to be hanged for the crime? A peal of laughter from +the one, a shudder from the other, was the only reply to these efforts +to break the force of the girl's self-reproach. Florence clinched her +small fist in mock heroics and began again: + +"Your crimes have found you out! And mine--_mine_--has been the avenging +hand! Really, this is too good, kitten. I shall tell, let me see--I +shall tell--_Tom!_" + +The girl was on her feet in a flash. + +"Not that! _not that_, Florence! Anything but that! I will tell you +myself first--_he_ shall not?" Florence grew suddenly silent and grave. +The girl slipped down at her knees again, and clasping her hand, went +hoarsely on: + +"O Florence, darling, I did not mean to wrong you! Truly, truly, I did +not--and I do not believe _he_ did--not at--first. We--oh, it was--" +she sank on the floor, at the feet of her astonished friend, and with +upstretched arms in the darkness whispered: "Florence, Florence--O my +God! I _cannot_ tell you! I must go away! _I must go away!_" The older +woman did not touch the outstretched hands and they sank to the floor, +and on them rested a tear-stained, wretched face. + +A moment later Tom Campbell entered the room. To eyes unaccustomed to +the darkness nothing was visible. He did not see his wife, who arose as +he entered, and stood with bated breath over the form of the girl on the +floor. + +"By Jove!" he muttered, "this room is as dark as Egypt, and then +some--Wonder where Florence is. Those damned servants ought to be shot! +Whole house like a confounded coal-pit! Didn't expect me for hours yet, +I suppose! That's no reason for living like a lot of damned bats! 'Fraid +of musquitoes, I suppose. Where are those matches? _Florence!_ She's +evidently gone out--or to bed. Wonder where her little 'kitten' is? +Umm--wonder how much longer Florence means to keep her here? Don't see +how the thing's going to go on much longer this way, with a girl with a +conscience like that. Perfectly abnormal! Perfectly ridiculous! Umm--no +more tact than--" + +Nellie moaned aloud. Florence had held her breath, hoping he would +go. He had almost reached the door leading to the hall, after his vain +search for matches. + +"Hello! what was that?" said Campbell, turning again into the room. + +His wife knew that escape was not now possible. "Nothing, Tom," she +said, in a voice that trembled a little. "Go upstairs. I will come up +soon." + +"Why, hello, Florence, that you? What are you sitting here in the dark +for, all alone? Why didn't you speak to me when I came in? What did you +let me--" + +Nellie sat up, and in doing so overturned a chair. + +Tom's eyes had grown accustomed to the darkness. He saw the two women +outlined before him, and he saw that Nellie had been on the floor, and +that his wife stood over her. + +"What's the matter?" he demanded. "What's up?" + +He came toward them. Nellie sprang to her feet, with flashing eyes and +outstretched, imploring hands to wave him back. She was about to rush +into a painful explanation. Florence stepped toward her, put both arms +about her, and drew her onto the cushioned window-seat at their side. +She knew she must cover the girl's agitation from her husband, and +somehow gain time to think. + +"Sit down, dear," she said softly. "Sit down here by me. You have been +asleep. He frightened you coming in so suddenly. You have been dreaming; +you talked in your sleep--but it was all nonsense--about an ancestor, +whom you blamed very bitterly." + +The girl began to speak impulsively, but Florence checked her. + +"Yes, I know. You told me. It was all the greatest stuff. But the part +that was true--I doubt if she was to blame. I think, from all I know +of--of her, and of the gentleman you mentioned, the one she--seemed to +care for--that--oh, no, kitten! I am _sure she_ was not to blame." + +Nellie was trembling violently, clinging to her friend in shame and +remorse. Tom stood perfectly quiet in the deeper darkness, back from +the window, with a smile on his cheerful face and a puzzled light in his +handsome eyes. + +"Go upstairs, Tom," said Florence again, this time in a steadier tone. +"Nellie's head aches; you waked her up too suddenly. We don't want more +light--do we, Nellie? Not just now. We have quite light enough for the +present. I assure you we are better off just now in the dark. You would +think so yourself if you could see us as we see ourselves. We are +quite battered and out at elbow, I assure you, and not at all fit for +fastidious masculine eyes." + +She was pulling herself up well. "To-morrow we will spruce up our bangs, +put on fresh gowns, and not know ourselves for the wretches we are +tonight. Until then, Sir Knight, no masculine eye shall rest upon our +dilapidation. Go!" + +Tom Campbell had seen his wife in this mood before. He went. + +All the way upstairs he wondered what had happened. "Never could make +women out anyway," he muttered; "least of all, Florence. Women are a +queer lot. More you live with 'em, more you don't know what they'll do +next. Wonder what in thunder's up. 'Kitten' never said a word; but I'm +damned if I did't hear her groan! Guess the little goose feels kind +of--queer--with me and the old lady both present. Wonder--whew!--wonder +how much I said aloud, and how much they heard when I first went in! +Confounded habit, talking aloud to myself! Got to stop it, old boy; must +be done--get you into trouble yet!" + +Then he turned off the gas, and was sleeping as peacefully as an infant +before the two women below stairs had parted for the night. + +When Tom left the room, Nellie began to sob again, and Florence stroked +her hair with her icy hands and waited for the girl to speak--or grow +calm. And for herself--she hardly knew what she waited for in herself; +but she felt that she needed time. + +After a long silence she said, quite gently; "Nellie, little girl, we +will go upstairs now; you will go to bed. If you ever feel like it, +after you take time to think it over, and your nerves are quiet--if +you ever feel like it, you may tell just what trick your troublesome +ancestor has tried to play you; but I want to say now, dear, don't feel +that you _must_ tell me, nor that I do not know perfectly well that +my little kitten is all right, ancestors or no ancestors, and that we, +together can somehow find the combination to that Time Lock that so +distresses you, and turn it off again. Meantime, little girl _no one_ +shall harm you. You shall be let alone; you are all right! Be _sure_ of +that. I am. Now, good-night;" and she kissed the still sobbing girl on +the forehead and hands, in spite, of her protests and self-accusations. + +Suddenly Nellie sank on her knees again, and grasped Florence's dress as +she had turned to go: + +"O Florence! O Florence! are you human? How _can_ you? You are not like +other women! O my God! if I could only be like you; but you frighten me! +You are so calm. How cold your hands are! oh--" + +"Are they? I did not notice. Oh well, no matter; it is an old trick of +theirs, you know." + +Florence Campbell's voice was very steady now. Her words were slow and +deliberate--they sounded as if she was very tired; and her step, as she +climbed the stairs, had lost its spring and lightness. + +The next morning Nellie's breakfast was carried to her room, with a +message from Florence not to get up until she came to her at their usual +hour for reading together. + +About noon, as the girl lay thinking for the hundredth time that she +must get up and face life again--that she must somehow stop this +blinding headache, and go away--that she must die--Florence swept into +the room, trailing her soft, long gown behind her, and gently closed the +door. She had put on a gay pink tea-gown, with masses of white lace and +smart little bows in unexpected places. + +"Feel better, dear?" she asked, gayly. "Griggs told me your head ached, +and that you had not slept well. I confess I did not either--not very. +Tom and I talked rather late; you know he sails for Liverpool at noon. +Sure enough, you didn't know. Well, no matter. The vessel is just about +sailing now. Yes, it is _rather_ sudden. We talked so much of it last +night that it seems quite an old story to me to-day, though. You know +he was to go in two weeks, anyway. It seemed best to go earlier, so I +helped him pack, and saw him to the steamer two hours ago. You know a +man doesn't have to take anything but a tooth-brush and a smoking-cap. +We thought it would be best for his health to go at once. Tom has not +seemed quite himself of late." She did not look at her friend as she +talked and her white face was turned from the light. She talked so fast, +it seemed as if she had rehearsed and was repeating a part with a desire +to have it over as soon as might be. "His Travelling Ancestor, the one +who wants change--change--change in all things, has had hold of him of +late. I'm sure you have noticed how restless he was." + +The girl sat up and listened with wide eyes and flushed cheeks. She had +known many unexpected and unexplained things to be done in the house of +this friend, who had given her a home and a warm welcome a year before, +when she had left school, an orphan and homeless. But this sudden +departure she had not heard even mentioned before. She thought she +understood it. + +"O Florence! Florence!" she cried, passionately. "It is _my_ fault! I +have separated you! I have brought sorrow to you! You, who are so good, +_so good;_ and I--oh, how _can_ you be so kind to me? _Hate_ me! _Hate +me!_ Thrust me from your house, and tell the world I tried to steal your +husband! Tell that I am vile and wicked! Tell--and now I have sent him +away from you, who love him--whom he loves! Why do you not blame me? Why +do you never blame anyone? Why--" + +There was a pause; the girl sobbed bitterly, while the older woman +seemed afraid to trust her voice. After a while in a tired, solemn tone, +Nellie went on: + +"Do you think you can believe a word I say, Florence? Is there any use +for me to tell you the truth?" + +Her friend nodded slowly, looking her steadily in the eyes. Her lips +were tightly drawn together, and her hands were cold and trembling. + +"Then, Florence, I will tell you, truly--truly--truly, as I hope for--" +She was going to say "your forgiveness," but it seemed too cruel to ask +for that just now. "I did not understand, not at first, either him or +myself. I thought he was like you"--she felt Florence shudder--"and +loved me, as he said, as you did. I was so glad and proud, +until--until--O Florence! how can I tell you that I let him _beg_ me to +go away with him! After I understood what he meant, my heart _did_ leap, +even in its utter self-abasement and wretchedness. I let him beg me +twice, and kiss me, _after_ I understood! It must have been my fault; +he said it was"--Florence took her friend's hand in hers--"and he said +that no one else had ever taken his thoughts away from you." + +The girl thought she saw the drawn lips before her curl; but she must +free her whole heart now, and lay bare her very soul. + +"He said that he had always been true to you, Florence, even in thought, +until I--O Florence! I must be worse than anyone one earth. I--he said--" + +Florence Campbell sprang to her feet. "Yes, I know, I know!" she +exclaimed, breathlessly, "and you _believed_ him! Poor little fool! +Women do. Sometimes a second time, but not a third time, dear--not a +third time! Do not blame yourself any more." She stopped, then hurried +on as one will do when danger threatens from within. "If it had not been +you, it would, it might--my God! it might have been worse! Some poor +girl--" + +She stopped again as if choking. The two women looked at each other; +the younger one gave a long, shuddering moan, and buried her face in her +hands. + +Presently Florence said slowly: "All ancestors were not thieves. Some +were simply fickle, and light, and faithless." + +Nellie raised a face full of passionate suffering: "Florence! Florence! +how can you excuse either of us? How _can--_" + +Suddenly, with a great sob, Florence Campbell threw herself into the +girl's outstretched arms, and with a wail of utter desolation cried: +"Hush, Nellie, hush! Never speak of it again, never! Only _love_ me, +_love me--love me!_ I need it so! And _no_ one--no one in all the world +has ever loved me truly!" It was the only time Nellie ever saw Florence +Campbell lose her self-control. + + + + +FLORENCE CAMPBELL'S FATE. + +_"'Tis the good reader that makes the good book; a good head cannot read +amiss; in every book he finds passages which seem confidences or asides +hidden from all else and unmistakably meant for his ear...._" + +_"Every man has a history worth knowing, if he could tell it, or if we +could draw it from him."_--Ralph Waldo Emerson. + + +I was sitting in my office, with my head in my hands, and with both +elbows resting on my desk. I was tired in every nerve of my body; +more than that, I was greatly puzzled over the strange conduct of my +predecessor in the college, whose assistant I had been, and whose place +I was appointed to fill during the unexpired term for which he had been +elected lecturer on anatomy. + +That morning he was to introduce me to the class formally as his +successor, deliver his last lecture, and then retire from active +connection with anatomical instruction. + +Everything appeared to be perfectly arranged, and, indeed, some of the +younger men--under my direction--had taken special pains to provide our +outgoing and much admired professor with rather unusual facilities for a +brilliant close to his career as our instructor. + +I was feeling particularly pleased with the arrangements, when, after a +neat little speech on his part, commendatory of me, and when we supposed +him to be about to begin his lecture, he suddenly turned to me and +said, bluntly: "You will be so good as to take the class to-day. Young +gentlemen, I bid you good morning," and abruptly took up his hat and +left. I sat facing an expectant and surprised class of shrewd young +fellows, and I was quite unprepared to proceed. + +I had intended my first lecture to be a great success. It was ready +for the following day; but my notes were at home, and my position can, +therefore, be better imagined than described. + +I was thinking over this and the strange behavior of my generally +punctilious predecessor, when he entered my office, unannounced, and, +after the ordinary salutations and apologies for having placed me in so +undesirable a position in the morning, he told me the following episode +from his history. I will give it in his own words, omitting, as far as +possible, all comment made by me at the time, thus endeavoring to leave +you alone with him and his story, as I was that night. This will better +enable me to impart the effect to you as it was conveyed to me at the +time. It greatly interested me then, but the more I think it over, +the less am I able to decide, in my own mind, all of the psychological +questions which it aroused then and which it has since called up. This +is the story. + + + + +I. + +I am, as you know, not a young man, and in the practice of my +profession, which has extended over a period of nearly thirty years, I +have learned to diagnose the cases that come under my care very slowly +and by degrees. Every year has taught me, what you will undoubtedly +learn--for I have great hopes for your future career--that physical +symptoms are often the results of mental ailments, and that, while +cordials and powders are sometimes very useful aids, the first and +all-important thing is to understand fully the _true_ history of my +patient. + +I have laid stress upon the word true, simply because while _a_ history +is easy enough to get, about the most difficult matter in this world to +secure is _the_ history of one who comes to a physician ailing in body +or in mind. It is easy enough to treat a broken leg, a gunshot wound, or +even that ghastliest of physical foes, diphtheria, if it is one of these +and nothing more. + +But if it is a broken leg as to outward sign, and a broken heart as an +inward fact, then the case is quite another matter, and the treatment +involves skill of a different kind. + +If the bullet that tore its way through the body was poisoned with the +bitterness of disappointment, anxiety, terror, or remorse, something +more is needed than bandages and beef-tea. + +If diphtheria was contracted solely from a defective sewage-pipe, it +will, no doubt, yield to remedies and pure air. But if long years of +nervous and mental prostration have made ready its reception, the work +to be done is of a much more serious nature. + +So when I was first called to see Florence Campbell, the message +conveyed to me threw no light on the case, beyond what the most ordinary +observer would have detected at a glance. + +The note read thus: + +"Dr. H. Hamilton. + +"Dear Sir: Although I have been in your city for several months, it +is the first time since I came that I have myself felt that I needed +medical attention. I have, therefore, not sent you the enclosed note +(the history of which you no doubt know) until now. If you will read it, +it will explain that the time has now come when, if you will come to me, +I need your care. + +"Yours respectfully, + +"Florence Campbell." + +"Parlor 13, F------ Ave. Hotel." + +The note enclosed was from a physician in Chicago whom I had known +intimately many years before, but with whom, contrary to the hint given +by the lady, I had held no communication for a long time past. It said: + +"My Dear Doctor: One of my patients is about to visit your city. The +length of her stay is uncertain, and, as she is often ailing, she has +asked me to give her a note to one whom I believe to be skilful and to +possess the qualities which she requires in a physician. In thinking +over the list of those known to me in New York, I have decided to give +her this note to you. I need not commend her to you; she will do that +for herself. You will see at a glance that she is a charming woman, and +you will learn in five minutes' conversation with her, that she is a +brilliant one. She is also one of those rare patients to whom you +can afford to tell the unvarnished truth--an old hobby of yours, I +remember--and from whom you can expect it. She has had no serious +illness recently, but is rather subject to slight colds and sick +headache. I give her sulph. 12. She always responds to that in time. + +"Yours, as ever, + +"Thomas C. Griswold." + +I folded the note and laid it on my desk and took up a pen. Then, +on second thought, I turned to the messenger and said, "Say to Miss +Campbell that I will call at four o'clock this afternoon." + +Before I had finished the sentence he was gone, and I laid down the pen +and sat thinking. + +How like Tom Griswold that was--the old Tom of college days--to write +such a note as that and give it to a patient! "Sulph. 12"--and then +I laughed outright at his interpretation of my desire for veracious +relations between patient and practitioner, and re-read his note from +end to end. + +Then I read hers again. Neither of them indicated the slightest need of +haste on my part. + +I pictured a pretty little blonde--I knew Tom's taste. He had been +betrothed to three different girls during the old days, and they had all +been of that type; small, blue-eyed, Dresden-china sort of girls, +who had each pouted--and married someone else in due time, after a +"misunderstanding" with Tom. + +One of these misunderstandings had been over some roses, I remember. +They did not "match" her dress in color, and she was wretched. She told +him he should have known better than to get that shade, when he knew +very well that she never wore anything that would "go with" it. + +He had naturally felt a little hurt, since he had bought the finest +and highest-priced roses to be had, and expected ecstatic praise of his +taste and extravagance. The "misunderstanding" was final, and, after a +wretched evening and several days of tragic grief, five tinted notes of +sorrow, reproach, and pride, they each began to flirt with some one else +and to talk of the inconstancy of the other sex. They vowed, of course, +that they would never marry anybody on earth, and finally engaged +themselves to marry some one else, who perhaps, had just passed through +a similar harrowing experience and was yearning to be consoled. + +I remember that Tom smoked a great deal during this tragic period, that +he looked gloomy, wore only black neckties, and allowed a cold to run on +until it became thoroughly settled and had to be nursed all the rest of +the winter. + +He knew that smoking injured him, and he doubtless had an idea that he +would end his misery by means of this cold, supplemented by nicotine +poison. How near he might have approached to success it would be +difficult to tell, if he had not met my sister Nellie at Christmas-time, +and, after having told his woes to her, promised her, "as a friend," not +to smoke again for three days and then to report to her. The report was +satisfactory, and she then confessed that she had forsworn bonbons for +the same length of time, as a sort of companionship in sacrifice. + +This, of course, impressed Tom as a truly remarkable test of friendship +and sympathy, and,--well, what is the use to tell the rest? + +You will know it. It had no new features, so far as I can now recall, +and I believe that they had been betrothed six months before Nellie +met grave old Professor Menlo and began the study of Greek roots and +mythology. + +I think that, perhaps, Tom would have been all right if it had not been +for the mythology. But Nellie was romantic, and the professor was an +enthusiast in this branch of knowledge, and so, by and by, Tom, poor +devil, took to smoking again--this time it was a pipe--and local +papers were filled with notices of the romantic marriage of "Wisdom and +Beauty," and poor little Nellie wrote a pathetic note to Tom, and sent +it by me, with frantic directions not to allow him to kill himself +because she had not understood her own heart; but that she loved +him truly--as a friend--still, and he must come to see her and _her_ +professor in their new home on the hill. And, dear, dear, what a time +I had with Tom! It is funny enough now; but even I felt sorry for him +then, and shielded him from the least unnecessary pain by telling +the boys that they absolutely must not congratulate me on my sister's +marriage, nor mention it in any way whatever, when Tom was present, +unless they wanted to have trouble with me personally. + +And to think that Tom married Kittie Johnson before he had fairly +finished his first year in the hospital service; and had to take her +home for his father to support! Since then I had seen him from time to +time, and heard of his large practice, his numerous children, and his +elegant home; but he never talked of his wife, although I believed him +to be perfectly satisfied with her. He seemed content, was prosperous +beyond expectation, and had grown fat and gouty, when I last saw him at +a medical convention. He attributed his too great flesh and his gout +to the climate of his Western home, and was constantly threatening to +retire from practice, and said that he should ultimately come to New +York to live. + +Yes, undoubtedly Florence Campbell is a petite blonde, with little white +teeth and a roseleaf cheek, thought I, and I laughed, and rang for my +carriage. + + + + +II. + +I do not know that I ever entered a more delicately perfumed room--and +I am very sensitive to perfumes--than the one in which Florence Campbell +sat. + +She arose from her deep arm-chair as I entered, and, extending her hand, +grasped mine with a vigor unusual in a woman, even when she is well. + +"This is Dr. Hamilton?" she said, in a clear voice, which told nothing +of pain, and was wholly free from the usually querulous note struck by +women who are ill, or who think that they are. "This is Dr. Hamilton? I +am very glad to see you, doctor. I am Florence Campbell. You received a +note from your friend, Dr. Griswold, of Chicago, and one telling how +I came to send it to you--how I came into possession of it." Direct of +speech, clear of voice, hand feverish, but firm in grasp, I commented +mentally, as she spoke. + +This is not what I had expected. This is not the limp little blonde that +I had pictured, on a lounge, in tears, with the light fluffy hair in +disorder, and a tone of voice which plead for sympathy. This is not the +figure I had expected to see. + +She stood with her back to the light, very erect and well poised. + +"Come to the window," I said. "Does your head ache?" That is always a +safe question to ask, you know. + +She laughed. "Oh, I don't know that it does--not particularly. I fancy +there is not enough inside of it to ache much. Mere bone and vacuity +could not do a great deal in that line, could it, doctor?" Then +she laughed again. She looked me in the eyes, and I fancied she was +diagnosing _me_. + +Her eyes were deep, large, and brown, or a dark gray; her complexion +was dark and clear--almost too transparent; her cheeks were flushed a +little; and the light in her eyes was unnaturally intense. + +She was evidently trying to gain time--to take my measure. + +"It is always a rather trying thing to get a new doctor; don't you think +so?" she asked, with another little laugh. "I always feel so foolish to +think I have called him to come for so trifling a matter as my ailments +are. I am never really ill, you know," she said with nervous haste; "but +I am not very strong, and so I often feel--rather--under the weather, +and I always fancy that a doctor can prevent, or cure it; but I suppose +he cannot. I shall really not expect a great deal of you, in that line, +doctor. I cannot expect you to furnish me with robust ancestors, can I? +Just so you keep me out of bed"--and here, for the first time, I noticed +a slight tremor in her voice--"just keep me so that I can read, +and--so that I shall not need to sit alone, and--think--I shall be quite +satisfied--quite." She had turned her face away, as she said the last; +but I saw that she was having a hard struggle to keep back the tears, +notwithstanding the little laugh that followed. + +I had felt her pulse; it was hardly perceptible, and fluttered rather +than beat; and I had watched her closely as she spoke; but whenever she +came near the verge of showing deeper than the surface she broke in with +that non-committal little laugh, or turned her face, or half closed her +great eyes, and I was foiled. Her pulse and the faint blue veins told me +one story; she tried to tell me quite another. + +"How are you suffering to-day," I asked. + +She looked steadily at me a moment, then lowered her eyes, raised her +left hand (upon which I remember noticing there was a handsome ring), +looked at its palm a moment, held her lips tightly closed, and then, +with a sudden glance at me, again as if on the defensive said: + +"I hardly know; I am only a little under the weather; I am weak. I +am losing my--grip--on myself; I am--losing my grip--on my--nerves. I +cannot afford to do that." The last was said with more emotion than she +cared to display. So she arose, walked swiftly to the dressing-case, +took up a lace handkerchief, glanced at herself in the mirror, moved a +picture (I noticed that it was a likeness of an old gentleman, perhaps +her father), and returned to a chair which stood in the shadow, and +then, with a merry little peal of laughter, said: "Well, I don't wonder, +doctor, that you are unable to diagnose that case. It would require a +barometer to do that I fancy, from the amount of weather I got into it. +But really, now, how am _I_ to know what is the matter with me? That is +for you to say; I am not the doctor. If you tell me it is malaria, as +all of you do, I shall be perfectly satisfied--and take your powders +with the docility of an infant in arms. I suppose it _is_ malaria, don't +you?" + +I wanted to gain time--to study her a little. I saw that she was, or had +been really ill; ill, that is, in mind if not in body. I fancied that +she had succeeded in deceiving Griswold into treating her for some +physical trouble which she did not have, or, if she had it, only as a +result of a much graver malady. + +The right branch may have been found and nipped off from time time +when it grew uncomfortably long, but the root, I believed, had not +been touched, and, I thought, had not been even suspected by her former +physician. + +We of the profession, as you very well know, do not always possess that +abiding faith in the knowledge and skill of our brethren that we demand +and expect from outsiders. + +We claim our right to guess over after our associates, and not always to +guess the same thing. + +I believed that Griswold had not fully understood his former patient. +"Sulph. 12," indeed! Then I smiled, and said aloud: + +"Dr. Griswold writes me that in such cases as yours he advises sulph. +12--that it has given relief. Do you call yourself a sulphur patient?" I +watched her narrowly, and if she did not smile in a satirical way, I was +deceived. "Are you out of that remedy? and do you want more of it?" I +asked with a serious face. + +She did not reply at once. There seemed to be a struggle in her mind as +to how much she would let me know. Then she looked at me attentively +for a moment, with a puzzled expression, I thought; an unutterably weary +look crossed her face. She said, slowly, deliberately: "I have no doubt +sulphur will do as well as anything else. Oh! yes--I am decidedly a +sulphur patient, no doubt I suppose I have taken several pints of that +innocent remedy in my time. A number of physicians have given it to +me from time to time. Your friend is not its only devotee. Sulphur and +nux--nux and sulphur! I believe they cure anything short of a broken +heart, or actual imbecility, do they not, doctor?" She laughed, not +altogether pleasantly. + +How far would she go and how far would she let me go, with this +humbuggery? I looked gravely into her eyes, and said, "Certainly they +will do all that, and more. They sometimes hold a patient until a doctor +can decide which of those two interesting complaints is the particular +one to be treated. In _your_ case I am inclined to suspect--the--that it +is--_not_ imbecility. I shall therefore begin by asking you to be good +enough to tell me what it is that affects your heart." + +I had taken her wrist in my hand, as I began to speak. My finger was on +her pulse. It gave a great bound, and then beat rapidly; and although +her face grew a shade paler and her eyes wavered as they tried to look +into mine, I knew that I had both surprised and impressed her. + +She recovered herself instantly, and made up her mind to hedge still +further. "If there is anything the matter with my heart, you are the +first to suspect it. My father, however, died of heart disease, and I +have--always--hoped that I should--die as suddenly. But I shall not! I +shall not! I am so--wiry--so all-enduring. I recover! I always recover!" + +She said this passionately, and as if it were a grave misfortune--as if +she were very old. I pretended to take it humorously. + +"Perhaps at your advanced age your father might have said the same." + +She laughed. She saw a loophole, and immediately took it. "Oh, you think +I am very young, doctor, but I am not. People always think me younger +than I am--at first. I look older when you get used to me. I am nearly +thirty." + +I was surprised; I had taken her to be about twenty-three. + +"In years or in experience?" I said. "Which way do you count your age?" + +She got up suddenly again and walked to the dressing-case, then to the +window. In doing so she raised her hand to her eyes. It was the hand +with the lace handkerchief in it. + +"Experience!" she exclaimed; and then, checking herself. "No, people +never think me so old--not at first," she said, returning to her chair. +"But I suppose I am not too old to be cured with sulph. 12, am I?" Then +she laughed her little nervous, quick laugh, and added: "Dear old Dr. +Griswold, what faith he must have in 'sulph. 12.' and in his patients. +He seems to think that they were made for each other, as it were; +and--of course, I am not a doctor--how do I know they were not?" + +"Miss Campbell," I said, stepping quickly to her side and surprising +her, "you do not need sulphur. You need to be relieved of this strain +on your nerves. Make up your mind to tell me your history to-morrow +morning--to tell it all; I do not want some fairy-tale. Until then, take +these drops to quiet your nerves." + +There were tears in her eyes. She did not attempt to hide them. They +ran down her cheeks, and she simply closed the lids and let them flow. +I took her lace handkerchief and wiped her cheeks. Then I dropped it in +her lap, placed the phial on her stand, took up my hat, and left. + + + + +III. + +But I did not get her story the next day, nor the next, nor the next. + +Her tact was perfectly mystifying in its intricacy; her power of evasion +marvellous, and her study of me amusing. She grew weaker and more +languid every day; but insisted that she had no pain--"nothing upon +which to hang a symptom," she would say. + +I suggested that refuge of all puzzled doctors--a change. + +"A change!" she said, wearily. "A change! Let me see, I have been here +nearly five months. I stayed two months in the last place. I was nine +days in San Francisco, one year doing the whole of Europe, and seven +months in Asia. Yes, decidedly, I must need a change. There are three +places left for me to try, which one do you advise?" There was a bitter +little laugh, but her expression was sweet, and her eyes twinkled as she +glanced at me. + +"I am glad I have three places to choose from," I said. "I was afraid +you were not going to leave so many as that, and had already begun to +plan 'electric treatment' as a final refuge." + +She laughed nervously, but I thought I saw signs of a mental change. + +I had always found that I could do most with her by falling into her +own moods of humor or merry satire upon her own condition or upon the +various stages of medical ignorance and pretence into which we are often +driven. + +"Where are these three unhappy places that you have so shamelessly +neglected? Was it done in malice? I sincerely hope, for their sakes, +that it was not so bad as that--that it was a mere oversight on your +part," I went on. + +"Australia has been spared my presence so far through malice; the other +two, through defective theology. I dislike the idea of one of them +on account of the climate, and of the other, because of the stupid +company," she said, with a droll assumption of perplexity; "so, you +see, I can't even hope for a pleasant change after death. Oh, my case is +quite hopeless, I assure you, doctor; _quite!_" She laughed again. + +I had her where I wanted her now. I thought by a little adroitness I +might get, at least, a part of the truth. + +"So you are really afraid to die, and yet think that you must," I said, +bluntly. + +She turned her great luminous eyes on me, and her lip curled slightly, +with real scorn, before she forced upon her face her usual mask of +good-hum-ored sarcasm. + +"Afraid!" she exclaimed, "afraid to die! afraid of what, pray? I cannot +imagine being afraid to die. It is _life_ I am afraid of. If I could +only--" This last passionately. She checked herself abruptly, and with +an evident effort resumed her usual light air and tone. "But it does +always seem so absurdly impossible to me, doctor, to hear grownup people +talk about being afraid to die. It almost surprised me into talking +seriously, a reprehensive habit I never allow myself. A luxury few can +afford, you know. It skirts too closely the banks of Tragedy. One is +safer on the high seas of Frivolity--don't you think?" + +"Much safer, no doubt, my child," said I, taking her hand, which was +almost as cold and white as marble; "much safer from those deceived and +confiding persons who prescribe 'sulph. 12' for the broken heart and +overwrought nerves of a little woman who tries bravely to fly her gay +colors in the face of defeat and to whistle a tune at a grave." + +I had called late, and we were sitting in the twilight, but I saw tears +fall on her lap, and she did not withdraw her hand, which trembled +violently. + +I had touched the wound roughly--as I had determined to do--but, old man +as I was, and used to the sight of suffering as I had been for years, I +could restrain myself only by an effort from taking her in my arms and +asking her to forget what I had said. She seemed so utterly shaken. We +sat for some moment in perfect silence, except for her quick, smothered +little sobs, and then she said, passionately: + +"Oh, my God! doctor, how did you know?" And then, with a flash of fear in +her voice, "Who told you? No one has talked me over to you? No one has +written to you?" + +"I know nothing, except what I have seen of your brave fight, my child. +All the information I have had about you, from outside, was contained in +that valuable little note of introduction from Griswold." + +In spite of her tears and agitation she smiled, but looked puzzled, as I +afterward recalled she always did when I mentioned his name, or spoke as +if she knew him well. + +"I have not watched you for nothing. And I never treat a patient without +first diagnosing his case. I do not say that I am _always_ right. I am +not vain of the methods nor of the progress of my profession; but I am, +at least, not blind, and I have always been interested in you. I should +like to help you, if you will let me. I can do nothing for you in the +dark." Then dropping my voice, significantly: "Does _he_ know where you +are? Does _he_ know you are ill?" + +There was a long silence. I did not know but that she was offended. She +was struggling for command of her voice, and for courage. Presently she +said, in a hoarse whisper, which evidently shocked her as much as it +startled me, so unnatural did it sound: + +"Who? My husband?" + +"Your _husband!_" I exclaimed. "Are you--is there--I did not know you +were married. Why did you always allow me to call you _Miss_ Campbell?" + +"I do not know," she said, wearily. "It made no difference to me, and it +seemed to please your fancy to treat me as a child.. But I never really +noticed that you did always call me Miss. If I had, I should not have +cared. What difference could it make to me--or to you--what prefix you +put to my name?" + +"But I did not know you were married," I said almost sharply. + +She looked up, startled for a moment; but recovering, as from some vague +suspicion, in an instant she said, smiling a little, and with evident +relief, plunging into a new opening: + +"That had nothing to do with my case. There was no need to discuss +family relations. I never thought of whether _you_ were married or +not. You were my doctor--I your patient. What our family relations, +wardrobes, or political affiliations might be seem to me quite aside +from that. We may choose to talk of them together, or we may not, as +the case may be. And in my case, it would not be--edifying." There was +a moment's pause, then she said, rather impatiently, but as if the new +topic were a relief to her: "The idea that a woman must be ticketed as +married or unmarried, to every chance acquaintance, is repellent to me. +Men are not so ticketed--and that is right. It is vulgar to suppose a +sign is needed to prevent trespass, or to tempt approach. 'Miss Jones, +this is Mr. Smith.' What does it tell?" She was talking very rapidly +now--nervously. "It tells her, 'Here is a gentleman to whom I wish to +introduce you. If you find him agreeable you will doubtless learn more +of him later on.' It tells him, 'Here is a lady. _She is not married._ +Her family relations--her most private affairs--are thrust in his face +before she has even said good evening to him. I think it is vulgar, +and it is certainly an unnecessary personality. What his or her marital +relations may be would seem to come a good deal later in the stage of +acquaintance, don't you think so, doctor?" She laughed, but it was not +like herself. Even the laugh had changed. She was fighting for time. + +"It is a new idea to me," I said, "and I confess I like it. Come to +think of it, it _is_ a trifle premature--this thrusting a title intended +to indicate private relations onto a name used on all public occasions. +By Jove! it is absurd. I never thought of it before; but it is _never_ +done with men, is it? 'General,' 'Mr.' 'Dr.'--none of them. All relate +to him as an individual, leaving vast fields of possibilities all about +him. 'Mrs.' 'Miss'--they tell one thing, and one only. That is of a +private nature--a personal association. You have started me on a new +line of thought, and," said I, taking her hand again, "you have given +me so much that is new to think of to-night that I will go home to +look over the budget. You are tired out. Go to bed now. Order your tea +brought up. Here is an order to see to anything you may ask, promptly. +Beesley, the manager, is an old friend of mine. Any order you may give, +if you send it down with this note from me, will be obeyed at once. I +shall come to-morrow. Good-night." + +I put the order on the table, at her side. I know my voice was husky. +It startled me, as I heard it. She sat perfectly still, but she laid her +other hand on top of mine, with a light pressure, and her voice sounded +tired and full of tears. + +"Good-night. You are very kind--very thoughtful. I will be brave +to-morrow. Good-night." That night I drove past and saw a light in her +window at one o'clock. "Poor child!" I said; "will she be brave enough +to tell me to-morrow, or will she die with her burden, and her gay +little laugh on her lips?" + + + + +IV. + +The next day I called earlier than usual. I had spent an almost +sleepless night, wondering what I could do for this beautiful, lovable +woman, who seemed to be all alone in the world, and who evidently felt +that she must remain apart and desolate. + +What had caused her to leave her husband? Or had he left her? What for? +What kind of a man was he? Did she love him, and was she breaking her +heart for him? or did he stand between her and some other love? Had she +married young, and made a mistake that was eating her life out? Whose +fault was it? How could I help her? + +All these and a thousand other questions forced themselves upon me, and +none of the answers came to fit the case. Answers there were in plenty, +but they were not for these questions nor for this woman--not for this +delicate flower of her race. + +As I stepped into the hotel office to send my card to "Parlor 13," as +was my custom, the clerk looked up with his perfunctory smile and said, +"Go' morning, doctor. Got so in the habit 'coming here lately, s'pose +it'll take quite a while to taper off. That about the size of it?" + +I stared at the young man in utter bewilderment. + +"Ha! ha! ha! I believe you'd really forgot already she'd gone;" +and then, with a quick flash of surprise and intelligent, detective +shrewdness, "You knew she was going, doctor? She did not skip her little +bill, did she? Of course not. Her husband was in such a deuce of a hurry +to catch the early train, the night-clerk said he was ringing his bell +the blessed night for fear they'd get left. Front! take water to 273. +You hadn't been gone five minutes last night, when he came skipping down +here with your check and order, and we just had to make things hum to +get cash enough together to meet it for her; but we made it, and so they +got off all right." + +"Have you got my check here yet?" asked I, in in a tone that arrested +the attention of the other clerk, who looked up in surprise. + +"Good heavens! no. Do you think we're made of ready money, just because +you are? That check was in the bank and part of the cash in that desk +the first thing after banking hours," said he, opening out the register +and reaching for a bunch of pens behind him. "You see it cleaned us out +last night. I couldn't change two dollars for a man this morning. I told +Campbell last night that you must think hotels were run queer, to +expect us to cash a five-thousand dollar check on five minutes' notice. +Couldn't 'a' done it at all if 't hadn't been pay-night for servants and +the rest of us. We all had to wait till to-day. But the old man'll tell +you. Here he comes." + +"Why, hello! doctor, old boy," said Beesley, coming up from behind and +clapping me vigorously on the shoulder. "Didn't expect to see the light +of your countenance around here again so soon. Thought we owed it all +to your professional ardor for that charming patient of yours up in 13. +They got off all right, but if any other man but you had sent that order +and check down here for us to cash last night I'd have told him to +make tracks. Of course, I understood that they were called away +suddenly--unexpectedly, and all that. He told me all about it, and that +you did not finish the trade till the last minute; but--" + +"_Trade?_" gasped I, in spite of my determination to hear all before +disclosing anything. "Trade?" + +"Oh, come off. Don't be so consumedly skittish about the use of English, +I suppose you want me to say that the 'transaction between you was not +concluded,' etc., etc. Oh, you're a droll one, doctor." He appeared +to notice a change on my face, which he evidently misconstrued, and he +added, gayly. "Oh, it was all right, my boy, as long as it was you--glad +to do you a good turn any day; but what a queer idea for that little +woman to marry such a man! How did it happen? I'd like to know the +history! Every time I saw him come swelling around I made up mind to ask +you about them, and then I always forgot it when I saw you. When he told +me you had been his wife's guardian I thought some of kicking you the +next good chance I got, for allowing the match, and for not telling me +you had such a pretty ward. You always were a deep rascal--go off!" He +rattled on. + +Several times I had decided to speak, but as often restrained myself. My +blank face and unsettled manner appeared to touch his sense of humor. +He concluded that it was good acting. I decided to confirm the mistake, +until I had time to think it all over. Finally, I said, as carelessly as +I could: + +"How long had this--a--husband been here? That is--when did he get +back?" + +"Been here! get back! Been here all the time; smoked more good cigars +and surrounded more wine than any other one man in the house. Oh, he was +a Jim-dandy of a fellow for a hotel!" Then, with sudden suspicion: "Why? +Had he told you he'd go away before? Oh! I--see! _That_ was the trade? +Paid him to skip, hey? M--m--m--yes! I think I begin to catch on." He +could hardly restrain his mirth, and winked at me in sheer ecstasy. + +I went slowly out. When I arrived at the house I directed the servant to +say to anyone who might call that the doctor was not at home. I went +to my room and wrote to Dr. Griswold, asking him for information about +Florence Campbell, the fair patient he had sent me. "Who was she? What +did he know of her? Where were her friends?" I told him nothing of this +last development, but asked for an immediately reply, adding--"for an +important reason." + +Three days later a telegram was handed to me as I drove up to my office. +It was this: + +"Never heard of her. Why? Griswold?" + +I did not sleep that night. For the first time my faith in Florence +Campbell wavered. Up to that time I had blamed her husband for +everything. I had woven around her a web of plausible circumstances +which made her the unwilling victim of a designing villain--an expert +forger, no doubt, who used her, without her own knowledge, as a decoy--a +man of whom she was both ashamed and afraid, but from whom she could not +escape. + +But how was all that to be reconciled with this revelation? Griswold did +not know her. How about his introduction and that "sulph. 12"? I looked +through my desk for Griswold's note. It was certainly his handwriting; +but I noticed, for the first time, that it did not mention her name. + +Perhaps this was a loop-hole through which I might bring my fair +patient--in whom I was beginning to fear I had taken too deep an +interest--without discredit to herself. + +Might she not have changed her name since Griswold treated her? I +determined to give her the benefit of this doubt until I could be sure +that it had no foundation. + +I felt relieved by this respite, and, heartily ashamed of the unjust +suspicion of the moment before, I gave no hint of it in the letter I now +wrote Griswold, describing the lady, and in which I enclosed his letter +of introduction to me. + +The next few days I went about my practice in a dream, and it was no +doubt due to fortuitous circumstances rather than to my skill that +several of my patients still live to tell the tale of their suffering +and of my phenomenal ability to cope with disease in all its malignant +power. + + + + +V. + +In due time Griswold's letter came. I went into my office to read it. I +told myself that I had no fears for the good name of Florence Campbell. +I knew that some explanation would be made that would confirm me in my +opinion of her; but, for all that, I locked the door, and my hand was +less steady than I liked to see it, as I tore the end of the envelope. + +I even remember thinking vaguely that I usually took time to open my +letters with more precision and with less disregard for the untidy +appearance of their outer covering afterward. I hesitated to read beyond +the first line, although I had so hastened to get that far. I read: "My +dear old friend," and then turned the letter over to see how long it +was--how much probable information it contained. There were four closely +written pages. I wondered if it could all be about Florence Campbell, +and was vaguely afraid that it was--and that it was _not_. I remembered +looking at the clock when I came into the office. It was nearly six +o'clock. I laid the letter down and went to the cooler and got out +a bottle of Vichy. I sat it and (placed) some wine by my elbow on the +desk, and took up the letter. + +"I never heard of anyone by the name of Florence Campbell, so far as I +can recall. I certainly never had a patient by that name. Some months +ago I gave the letter you enclose--which I certainly did write--to a +patient of mine who was on her way to Europe and expected to stay some +time in New York on her way through. + +"She, however, was in no way like the lady you describe. Her name was +Kittie Hatfield, and she was small, with dreamy blue eyes and flaxen +hair--a _perfect_ woman, in fact." Oh! Tom! Tom! thought I--true to your +record, to the last! I had long since ceased to wonder at the lapse, +however, for Florence Campbell herself was surely sufficient explanation +of all that. "I understood"--the letter went on--"that Kittie did not +stop but a few days in New York, when she was joined by the party with +which she was to travel. She stayed at the F------ Avenue Hotel, I have +learned, and became intimate with some queer people there--much to the +indignation of her brother, when he learned of it." + +I laid the letter down and put my head on my arms, folded as they were +on the desk. I was dizzy and tired. When I raised my head it was dark. +I got up, lighted the gas, and found myself stiff and as if I had been +long in a forced and unnatural position. I recalled that I had been +indignant. + +This brother of the silly-pated, blue-eyed girl had not liked her +to know Florence Campbell, indeed! He was, no doubt, a precious +fool--naturally would be, with such a sister, I commented mentally. +What else, I wondered, had Griswold found out? Was the rest of this old +fool's letter about her? I began where I had left off. + +"I have since learned from him that the man--whose name _was_ +Campbell--was a foreigner of some kind, with a decidedly vague, not +to say, hazy reputation, and that his wife, who was supposed to be an +invalid, and an American of good family, never appeared in public, and +so was never seen by him--that is by Will Hatfield--but was only known +to him through Kittie's enraptured eyes. She was said to be bright and +pretty. Kittie is the most generous child alive in her estimate of other +women; however, he thinks it possible that Kittie either gave her the +letter from me to you, and asked her to have proper medical care, or +else that the woman, or her husband, got hold of it in a less legitimate +way; which I think quite likely. Kittie thought the Campbell woman was +charming." The "Campbell woman," indeed! I felt like a thief, even +to read such rubbish, and I should have enjoyed throttling the whole +ill-natured gossipping set--not omitting flaxen-haired Kittie herself. + +I determined to finish the letter, however. + +"Hatfield is so ashamed of his sister's friendship for the woman that +I had the utmost difficulty in making him tell me the whole truth, but, +from what I gathered yesterday, he thinks them most likely the head of a +gang of counterfeiters or forgers and--" + +I read no further, or, if I did, I can recall only that. It was burned +into my brain, and when a loud pounding on my office-door aroused me, I +found the letter twisted and torn into a hundred pieces, the Vichy and +wine-bottles at my side half-empty, and the hands of the clock pointing +to half-past ten. + +"Doctor, doctor," called my lackey; "oh, doctor! Oh, lord, I'm afraid +something's wrong with the doctor, but I'm afraid to break in the door." + +I went to the door to prevent a scene. One of my best patients stood +there, with Morgan, the man. Both of them were pale and full of +suppressed excitement. + +"Heavens and earth, doctor, we were afraid you were dead. I've been +waiting here a good hour for you to come home. No one knew you were in, +till Morgan peeped over the transom. What in the devil is the matter?" +said my patient. + +"Tired out, went to sleep," said I; but I did not know my own voice as I +spoke. It sounded distant, and its tones were strange. + +They both looked at me suspiciously, and with evident anxiety as to my +mental condition. I caught at the means of escape. + +"I am too tired to see anyone to-night. In fact, I am not well. You will +have to let me off this time. Get Dr. Talbott, next door, if anyone is +sick; I am going to bed. Good-night." + +There was a long pause. Then he said, wearily: "You are a young man, +doctor. You have taken the chair I left vacant at the college. I would +never have told the story to you, perhaps, only I wanted you to know why +I left the class in your care so suddenly this morning, when I uncovered +the beautiful face of the 'subject' you had brought from the morgue for +me to give my closing lecture upon. That class of shallow-pated fellows +have not learned yet that doctors--even old fellows like me--know a +good deal less than they think they do about the human race--themselves +included." + +I stammered some explanation of the circumstances, and again there was a +long silence. + +Then he said: + +"Found drowned, was she? Poor girl! Do you believe, with that face, she +was ever a bad woman? Or that she had anything to do with the rascality +of her husband, even if he were consciously a rascal? and who is to +judge of that, knowing so little of him? Did I ever recover the five +thousand dollars? Did I attempt to recover it? Oh, no. All this happened +nearly ten years ago now; and if that were all it had cost me I should +not mind. The hotel people never knew. Why should they? This is the +first time I have told the story. You think I am an old fool? Well, +well, perhaps I am--perhaps I am; who can say what any of us are, or +what we are not? Thirty years ago I knew that I understood myself and +everybody else perfectly. To-day I know equally well that I understand +neither the one nor the other. We learn that fact, and then we die--and +that is about all we do learn. You wonder, after what I tell you, if the +beautiful face at the demonstration class this morning was really hers, +or whether a strong likeness led my eyes and nerves astray You wonder if +she drowned herself, and why? Was it an accident? Did _he_ do it? This +last will be decided by each one according as he judges of Florence +Campbell and her husband--of who and what they were. Perhaps I shall +try to find him now. Not for the money, but to learn why she married the +man he seemed to be. It is hard to tell what I should learn. It is not +even easy to know just what I should _like_ to learn; and perhaps, after +all, it is better not to know more--who shall say?" + +And the doctor bade me good-night and bowed himself out to his carriage +with his old courtesy, and left me alone with the strange, sad story of +the beautiful girl whose lifeless form had furnished the subject of my +first lecture to a class of medical students. + + + + +MY PATIENTS STORY. + + _"Things are cruel and blind; their strength detains and deforms: + And the wearying wings of the mind still beat up the stream of their storms. + Still, as one swimming up stream, they strike out blind in the blast. + In thunders of vision and dream, and lightning of future and past. + We are baffled and caught in the current, and bruised upon edges of shoals; + As weeds or as reeds in the torrent of things are the wind-shaken souls."_ + + Algernon Charles Swinburne. + + + + +I. + +Perhaps I may have told you before, that at the time of which I speak, +my Summer home--where I preferred to spend much more than half of the +year--was on a sandy beach a few miles out of New York, and also that I +had retired from active practice as a physician, even when I was in the +city. + +Notwithstanding these two facts, I was often called in consultation, +both in and out of the city; and was occasionally compelled to take a +case entirely into my own hands, through some accident or unforeseen +circumstance. + +It was one of these accidents which brought the patient whose story I am +about to tell you, under my care. + +I can hardly say now, why I retained the case instead of turning it over +to some brother practitioner, as was my almost invariable habit; but for +some reason I kept it in my own hands, and, as it was the only one for +which I was solely responsible at the time, I naturally took more than +ordinary interest in and paid more than usual attention to all that +seemed to me to bear upon it. + +As you know I am an "old school" or "regular" physician, although that +did not prevent me from consulting with, and appreciating the strong +points of many of those who were of other, and younger branches of the +profession. + +This peculiarity had subjected me, in times gone by, to much adverse +criticism from some of my colleagues who belonged to that rigidly +orthodox faction which appears to feel that it is a much better thing +to allow a patient to die "regularly"--as it were--than it is to join +forces with one, who, being of us, is still not with us in theory and +practice. + +Recognizing that we were all purblind at best, and that there was and +still is, much to learn in every department of medicine, it did not +always seem to me that it was absolutely necessary to reject, without +due consideration, the guesses of other earnest and careful men, even +though they might differ from me in the prefix to the "pathy" which +forms the basis of the conjecture. + +We are all wrong so often that it has never appeared to be a matter +of the first importance--it does not present itself to my mind as +absolutely imperative--that it should be invariably the same wrong, or +that all of the mistakes should necessarily follow the beaten track of +the "old school." + +I had arrived at that state of beatitude where I was not unwilling for +a life to be saved--or even for pain to be alleviated, by other methods +than my own. + +I do not pretend that this exalted ethical status came to me all at +once, nor at a very early stage of my career; but it came, and I had +reaped the whirlwind of wrath, as I have just hinted to you. + +So when my patient let me know, after a time, that he had been used to +homeopathic treatment, I at once suggested that he send for some one of +that school to take charge of his case. + +He declined--somewhat reluctantly, I thought, still, quite positively. +But, in the course of events, when I felt that a consultation was due +to him as well as to myself, I asked him if he would not prefer that the +consulting physician should be of that school. + +He admitted that he would, and I assured him that I should be pleased to +send for any one he might name. + +He knew no doctor here, he said, and left it to me to send for the one +in whom I had the greatest confidence. + +It is at this point my story really begins. + +I stopped on my way uptown to arrange, with Dr. Hamilton, of Madison +Avenue, a consultation that afternoon, at three o'clock. I told the +doctor all that I, myself, knew at that time, of my patient's history. +Three weeks before I had been in a Fifth Avenue stage; a gentleman had +politely arisen to offer his seat to a lady at the moment that the stage +gave a sudden lurch which threw them both violently against each other +and against the end of the stage. + +He broke the fall for her; but he received a blow on the head, +which member came in contact with the money-box, with a sharp crack. +Accustomed to the sight of pain and suffering as I was, the sound of the +blow and his suddenly livid face gave me a feeling of sickness which did +not wholly leave me for an hour afterward. Involuntarily I caught him in +my arms--he was a slightly built man--and directed the driver to stop +at the first hotel. + +The gentleman was unconscious and I feared he had sustained a serious +fracture of the skull. He was evidently a man of culture, and I thought +not an American. I therefore wished, if possible, to save him a police +or hospital experience. + +By taking him into the first hotel I reasoned, we could examine him; +learn who and what he was, where he lived, and, after reviving him, send +him home in a carriage. + +The process of bringing him back to consciousness was slow, and as the +papers on his person, which we felt at liberty to examine, gave no clue +to his residence, we concluded to put him to bed and trust to farther +developments to show us what to do in the matter of removal. The lady +on whose account he had received the injury had given me her card, which +bore a name well known on the Avenue, and had stated that she would, if +necessary, be responsible for all expense at the hotel. + +It was deemed best, therefore, to put him to bed, as I said before, and +wait for him to indicate, for himself, the next move. I placed in the +safe of the hotel his pocketbook, which contained a large sum of money +(large that is, for a man to carry on his person in these days of +cheques and exchanges) and his watch, which was a handsome one, with +this inscription on the inside cover, "T. C. from Florence." + +The cards in his pocket bore different names and addresses, mostly +foreign, but the ones I took for his own were finely engraved, and +read "Mr. T. C. Lathro," nothing more. No address, no business; simply +calling cards, of a fashionable size, and of the finest quality. + +This, as I say, was about three weeks before I concluded to call Dr. +Hamilton in consultation; and I had really learned very little more of +my patient's affairs than these facts taken from his pocket that first +day while he was still unconscious. + +He was silent about himself, and while he had slowly grown better his +progress toward health did not satisfy me, nor do I think that he was +wholly of opinion, that I was doing quite all that should be done to +hasten his recovery. + +He was always courteous, self-poised, and able to bear pain bravely; but +I thought he watched me narrowly, and I several times detected him in +a weary sigh and an impatient movement of the eyebrows, which did not +tally with his assumption of cheerful indifference and hospitality. + +I use the word hospitality advisedly, for his effort always seemed to +be to treat me as a guest whom he must entertain, and distract from +observing his ailments, rather than as a physician whose business it was +to discover and remedy them. + +He had declined to be moved; said he was a stranger; had no preferences +as to hotels; felt sure this one was as comfortable as any; thanked me +over and over for having taken him there, and changed the subject. +He would talk as long as I would allow him on any subject, airily, +brightly, readily. On any subject, that is, except himself; yet from his +conversation I had gathered that he had travelled a great deal; was a +man of wealth and culture, whether French, Italian or Russian, I could +not decide. He spoke all of these languages, and words from each fitted +easily into place when for a better English one, he hesitated or was at +a loss. + +Indeed, he seemed to have seen much of every country and to have +observed impartially--without national prejudice. He knew men well, too +well to praise recklessly; and he sometimes gave me the impression, I +can hardly say how, that blame was a word whose meaning he did not know. + +He spoke of having seen deeds of the most appalling nature in Russia, +and talked of their perpetrators sometimes, as good and brave men. He +never appeared to measure men by their exceptional acts. + +Occasionally I contested these points with him, and I am not sure but +that it may have been the interest I took in his conversation that held +me as his physician; for as I said, I was well aware that he did not +improve as he should have done after the first few days. + +But I liked to hear him talk. He was a revelation to me. I greatly +enjoyed his breath and charity--if I may so express the mental attitude +which recognized neither the possession of, nor the need for, either +quality in his judgments of his fellow-men. + +He had evidently not been able to pass through life under the impression +that character, like cloth, is cut to fit a certain outline, and that +after the basting-threads are once in, no farther variation need be +looked for. Indeed, I question if he would have been able to comprehend +the mental condition of those grown-up "educated" children who are +never able to outgrow the comfortable belief that words and acts have +a definite, inflexible, par-value--that an unabridged dictionary, so to +speak, is an infallible appeal; who, in short, expect their villains to +be consistently and invariably villainous, in the regulation orthodox +fashion. + +Individual shades of meaning, whether of language or of character, +do not enter into their simple philosophy. Mankind suffers, in their +pennyweight scales, a shrinkage that is none the less real because +they never suspect that the dwarfage may be due to themselves--to their +system of weights and measures. All variations from their standard +indicate an unvarying tendency to mendacity. He whom they once detect in +a quibble, or in an attempt to acquire the large end of a bargain, never +recovers (what is perhaps only his rightful heritage, in spite of an +occasional lapse) the respect and confidence of these primer students +who are inflexible judges of all mental and moral manifestations. + +I repeat that this comfortable and regular philosophy was foreign to my +patient's mental habits, and I began to consider, the more I talked +with him, that it did not agree with my own personal observations. I +reflected that I was not very greatly surprised, nor did I lose faith +in a man necessarily, when I discovered him in a single mean or +questionable action. + +Why, then, should I be surprised to find those of whom I had known only +ill-engaged in deeds of the most unselfish nature? Deeds of heroism and +generosity such as he often recounted as a part of the life of some of +these same terrible Russian officials. There seems, however, to be that +in us which finds it far easier to reconcile a single mean or immoral +action with an otherwise upright life, than to believe it likely, or +even possible, for a depraved nature to perform, upon occasion, deeds of +exalted or unusual purity. Yet so common is the latter, that its failure +of recognition by humanity in general can be due it seems to me, only to +a wrong teaching or to a stupidity beyond even normal bounds. + +For, after all, the bad man who is all bad, is really a less frequent +product than that much talked of, but rare creature, a perfect woman. +Perhaps one could count the specimens of either of these to be met with +in a life time, on the fingers of one hand. + +But to return to my patient and his story. + +It was of these things that he and I had often talked, and I had come +to greatly respect the self-poise and acute observation, as well as the +broad human sympathy of this reserved and evidently sad-hearted man. +Sad-hearted I knew, in spite of his keen sense of humor, and his firm +grasp of philosophy. + +I gave Dr. Hamilton a brief outline of all this, as well as of the +physical condition of the man whom he was to see; for I believe it to be +quite as important for a physician to understand and diagnose the mental +as the physical conditions of those who come under his care before he +can prescribe intelligently for other than very trifling ailments. + +You can imagine my surprise when I tell you that the moment Dr. Hamilton +stepped into the room, and I mentioned his name, my patient, this +self-poised man of the world, whose nerves had often seemed to me to be +of tempered steel, looked up suddenly as you have seen a timid child do +when it is sharply reproved, and fainted dead away. + + + + +II. + +I confess that I expected a scene. + +I glanced at the doctor, but he showed no sign of ever having seen my +patient before, and went to work with me in the most methodical and +indifferent way possible to revive him. + +"You did not mention that this was one of his symptoms--a peculiarity +of his. Has he been subject to this sort of thing? Did he say he was +subject to it before he hurt his head, or has it developed since?" the +doctor inquired quietly as we worked. + +I bit my lip. His tone was so exasperatingly cool, while, knowing my +patient as I did, his startled manner and sudden fainting had impressed +me deeply. + +"It is the first time," I said, "since he was hurt--that is, since +he recovered consciousness after the blow--that he has exhibited the +slightest tendency to anything of the kind." + +I hesitated, then I said: "Doctor, if you know him; if this is the +result of seeing you suddenly (for he did not know who was to come) +don't you think--would it be well?--Do you think it best for you to be +where he will see you when he begins to revive?" + +The doctor stared at me, then at my patient. "I don't know him--never +saw him before in my life so far as I know. What did you say his name +is? Mum--oh, yes, Lathro--first and only time I ever heard it. Oh, no, +I suppose his nerves are weak. The excitement of seeing me--the idea +of--a--er--consultation." I smiled, involuntarily. "You don't know the +man, doctor," said I. "He is bomb proof as to nerves in that sense of +the word. He--a--There must be some other reason. He must have mistaken +you for some one else. I am sorry to trouble you, doctor, but would you +kindly step into the other room? He will open his eyes now, you see." + +When, a moment later, my patient regained consciousuess, he glanced +about him furtively, like a hunted man. He did not look like himself. + +He examined my face closely--suspiciously, I thought--for a moment. Then +I laughed lightly, and said: "Well, old fellow, you've been trying your +hand at a faint. That's a pretty way to treat a friend. I come in to see +you; you step out to nobody knows where--to no man's land--and give me +no end of trouble rowing you back to our shore. What did you eat for +dinner that served you that kind of a trick?" + +He looked all about the room again, examined my face, and then smiled, +for the first time since I had known him, nervously, and said: + +"I think my digestion must be pretty badly out of order. I'll declare +I saw double when you came in. I thought there were two of you; and the +other one--wasn't you." + +I laughed; "That is good. Two of me, but the other one wasn't me. Well, +thank heaven there is only one of me up to date." + +He smiled, but seemed disturbed still. I decided to ask him a direct +question: + +"Well now, just suppose there had been two of me--is that an excuse for +you to faint? Does associating with one of me try you to that extent +that two of me would prostrate you?" + +He did not take me up with his old manner. He was listless and absent. +I said that I would go down to the office and order some wine and return +at once. I slipped into the other room, and with my finger on my lips +motioned to Dr. Hamilton to pass out quietly before me. + +I followed him. "There is something wrong, Doctor," I said: "I am sorry, +but I shall have to ask you to go without seeing him again. I can't +tell you why yet, but I'll try to find out and let you know. Order some +champagne sent up to me, please, as you go out, and I will see you as +soon as I can." + +The moment I re-entered the room, my patient, whose restless eyes met +mine as I opened the door, said: "I thought you were talking to some +one." + +"I was," said I carelessly; a bell-boy, "I ordered wine. It will be up +soon." Then I changed the subject; but he was nervous and unlike himself +and none of the old topics interested him. + +When the door opened for the boy with the wine an expression of actual +terror passed over my patient's face. When I left him a half hour later +I was puzzled and anxious. + + + + +III. + +The moment I entered his room on the following day he said: "I +thought you had planned to have another doctor come and look me over, +yesterday." He was watching me closely as he spoke: "Did I hear you +mention his name?" + +Ah, thought I, here _is_ a mystery in spite of Dr. Hamilton's denial. I +will try him. + +"Yes," I said, "I had decided to ask the best Homeopathic doctor I know, +a skilful man, especially successful in diagnosing cases, to overhaul +you and see if he agrees with me that you ought to be on your feet this +blessed minute, if my diagnosis of your case is entirely right. I +don't see why you are still so weak. He may find the spring that I have +missed. Why?" + +"Did you--I am not acquainted with the doctors here,--I think you said +his name is--?" + +"I have not mentioned his name to you," I said, "but the one I had in +mind is Dr. Hamilton of---- Madison Avenue." + +There was no doubt about it, the color rose slowly to his face, and he +was struggling for self-control. At length he said: "No, I do not +wish to see another doctor. I am perfectly satisfied with you. I am--I +say--no, positively do not ask him; that is, do not ask anyone to come +unless I know and definitely agree to it. And I certainly shall want to +know who he is first." + +All this was wholly foreign to the man, to his nature and habit. + +"Tell me," I said, "what you have against Dr. Hamilton, for I cannot +fail to see that there is something behind all this." + +He did not reply for some time; then he said wearily, but with great +depth of feeling. + +"I suppose I may as well tell you. I cannot forgive him for an injury I +did him long ago." + +I did not say anything nor did I look at him. Presently he went on +hoarsely; "If I had only injured him, perhaps I could get over it but +I took a mean advantage of--I did it through a woman who liked him--and +whom he--loved and trusted." There was another long silence; then I +said; "You were right to tell me, Lathro. You need not fear that I will +betray you to him, and he does not know you. He did not recognize you +either before or after you fainted. Of course I knew there was something +wrong. He will not come again." + +He sprang to his feet, and a wave of red surged into his face. "I knew +it! I knew I had seen him! I was sure it was not a delusion," he said. +"He was here. No, he would not know me. He never saw me. I did not +injure him like a man, I struck from behind a woman. A woman who cared +for his respect, and I let him blame her. I suppose I could get over it +if it were not for that. I came back here partly to let him know, if +I could some way, that she was not to blame"--there was another +long silence--"and partly to get rid of myself. Russia did not do +it,--Turkey,--France--none of them. I thought perhaps he would--I had +some sort of a wild idea that he might settle with me some way. I have +carried that forged cheque in my brain, until--" + +I started visibly. I had had no idea that it was so bad as this. I +changed my position to hide or cover the involuntary movement I had +made, but he had seen it and the color died out of his face. He +forced himself to begin again. "I carried that forged check," he was +articulating now with horrible distinctness, "wherever I went. She never +knew anything about it. She knew I was--she thought, or feared, that I +might be somewhat--what you Americans call crooked; but she did not know +the truth, not until the very last. She knew that I had been unreliable +in some ways long ago; but she did not dream of the worst. At +last,--sometimes I think I was a fool to have done it,--but I told her. +I told her the whole truth, and--she left me. She had borne everything +till then. I think she came here. Before long I followed. She told me +not to, and I said I would not; but of course I did. I could not help +it. I knew then, and I know now, that I am putting myself into the +clutches of the law; but I do not care--not now-- since I cannot find +Florence Campbell." + +He pronounced the name as if it were a treasure wrung from him by force. +"It is the only really criminal thing I ever did. I do not know why +I did it. They say that crime--a taste for it, develops slowly, by +degrees. Maybe so; but not with me, not with me. + +"I had money enough; but--oh, my God! how I hated him. I saw that he +was growing to love her without knowing it. I often heard them talking +together. They did not know it, and if they had it could not have been +more innocent; but I was madly jealous, for the first time in my life. +I determined to make him think ill of her, and yet I said just now that +forgery was my only crime. That was worse, by far, but I believe it is +not a crime in law." + +He smiled scornfully. "I have outgrown all that now. The storm has +left me the wreck you see; but I thought it all out last night, and +determined to tell you. You are to tell--him--for her sake," he said +between his set teeth. + +"He may see her yet some day. She will never return to me--God bless +her! God help us both!" + +"No, she will never return to you nor to anyone else," I said, as gently +as I could. + +He sprang up with the energy of a maniac. "How do you know? What do you +know?" he demanded. + +"I only know that she is dead, my friend," I said, placing my hand on +his arm, "and that Dr. Hamilton does not wish to punish you. I heard it +all; the story of the forgery of his name, and that a Florence Campbell +was in some way connected with it. I heard it from him long, long ago; +but he does not know that you are Tom Campbell. You are safe." + +"Does not wish to punish me! I am safe! Great God, no one could punish +me. I do that. Safe! Oh, the irony of language!" + +There was a long pause. He had gone to the window and was staring out +into the darkness. + +Presently the sound of convulsive sobbing filled the room; I thought +best to remain near the door and make no effort to check his grief with +words. + +At last the storm spent itself. He came slowly into the middle of the +room and stood facing me. At length he said: + +"One of the greatest punishments is gone, thank God. Florence Campbell +is dead, you say. Do you know what it is, Doctor, to wish that one you +loved was dead?" + +"Yes, yes." I said; "but it is best for you not to talk any more--nor +think, just now--not of that--not of that." + +He broke in impatiently--"Don't you know me well enough yet to know that +that sort of thing--that sort of professional humbug is useless? Must +not talk more of that--nor think of it, indeed! What else do you suppose +I ever think of? The good men who are bad and the bad ones who are +good--the puppets of our recent conversations? Suppose we boil it down a +little. Am I a bad man? That is a question that puzzles me. Am I a good +one? At least I can answer _that_--and yet I never did but one criminal +deed in my whole life, and I have done a great many so-called good ones +to set over against it." + +"Then you can answer neither question with a single word," I said. He +took my hand and pressed it with the frenzy of a new hope. + +"At least one man's philosophy is not all words," he said. "You act upon +your theories. You are the only one I ever knew who did." + +"Perhaps I am the only one you ever gave the chance," I replied, still +holding his hand. + +We stood thus silent for a moment, then he said with an inexpressible +accent of satire: "Would you advise me to try it, doctor, with anyone +else?" I deliberated some time before I replied. Then I said: "No, I am +sorry to say that I fear it would not be safe. There is still so much +tiger in the human race. No, do not tell your story again to any one; it +can do no good. Most certainly I would advise you _not_ to try it ever +again." + +As I left the room he said: "True, true. It can do no good, none +whatever." + +The next day he left. I never saw him again. Two years later I received +a kind letter from him in which he greatly over-estimated all I had done +for him. The letter came from St. Petersburg and was signed "T. Lathro +Campbell, Col. Imperial Guard." + +I fancied, in spite of his letter, that he would rather sever all +connection with this country, and feel that he had no ties nor past; so +I never answered his letter. + +Sometimes I wonder if he misunderstood my silence, and accepted it as a +token of unfriendliness--and yet--well, I have never been able to decide +just what would be least painful to him; so I let it drift into years of +silence, and perhaps, after all, these very good intentions of mine may +be only cobble-stones added to the paving of the streets of a certain +dread, but very populous city which is, in these days of agnosticism +quite a matter of jest in polite society. + +Who shall say? Which would he prefer, friendly communication or silence +and forgetfulness? + + +THE END + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Thoughtless Yes, by Helen H. 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