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-<title>George Moore (1852-1933): Vain Fortune (1895)</title>
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-
-The Project Gutenberg EBook of Vain Fortune, by George Moore
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
-almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
-re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
-with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
-
-
-Title: Vain Fortune
-
-Author: George Moore
-
-Release Date: June 7, 2004 [EBook #11303]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK VAIN FORTUNE ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by Jon Ingram, Branko Collin and PG Distributed Proofreaders
-
-
-
-
-
-</pre>
-
-
-<a name="001.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<div class="image"><a href="images/image01.jpeg"><img src="images/image01-thumb.jpeg"
-alt="[drawing]" align="left"></a> "She slipped on her knees, and
-burst into a passionate fit of weeping."</div>
-
-<br>
-
-<a name="002.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h1><span class="caps">Vain Fortune</span></h1>
-
-<h2><span class="caps">A Novel</span></h2>
-
-<h3><span class="caps">By</span></h3>
-
-<h3><span class="caps">George Moore</span></h3>
-
-<h3><i><span class="caps">With Five Illustrations</span> By</i> <i><span
-class="caps">Maurice Greiffenhagen</span></i></h3> <span class="caps">New
-Edition</span> <span class="caps">Completely Revised</span> <span
-class="caps">London: Walter Scott, Ltd.</span> <span
-class="caps">Paternoster Square</span> 1895
-
-<a name="003.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Edinburgh: T. and A. <span class="small-caps">Constable</span>, Printers
-to Her Majesty</p>
-
-<a id="pv"></a>
-
-<h2><span class="caps">Prefatory Note</span></h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">I hope</span> it will not seem presumptuous to
-ask my critics to treat this new edition of <i>Vain Fortune</i> as a new
-book: for it is a new book. The first edition was kindly noticed, but it
-attracted little attention, and very rightly, for the story as told therein
-was thin and insipid; and when Messrs. Scribner proposed to print the book
-in America, I stipulated that I should be allowed to rewrite it. They
-consented, and I began the story with Emily Watson, making her the
-principal character instead of Hubert Price. Some months after I received a
-letter from Madam Couperus, offering to translate the English edition into
-Dutch. I sent her the American edition, and asked her which she would
-prefer to translate from. Madam Couperus replied that many things in the
-English edition, which she would like to retain, had been omitted from the
-American edition, that the hundred or more pages <a id="pvi"></a> which I
-had written for the American edition seemed to her equally worthy of
-retention.</p>
-
-<p>She pointed out that, without the alteration of a sentence, the two
-versions could be combined. The idea had not occurred to me; I saw,
-however, that what she proposed was not only feasible but advantageous. I
-wrote, therefore, giving her the required permission, and thanking her for
-a suggestion which I should avail myself of when the time came for a new
-English edition.</p>
-
-<p>The union of the texts was no doubt accomplished by Madam Couperus,
-without the alteration of a sentence; but no such accomplished editing is
-possible to me; I am a victim to the disease of rewriting, and the
-inclusion of the hundred or more pages of new matter written for the
-American edition led me into a third revision of the story. But no more
-than in the second has the skeleton, or the attitude of the skeleton been
-altered in this third version, only flesh and muscle have been added, and,
-I think, a little life. <i>Vain Fortune</i>, even in its present form, is
-probably <a id="pvii"></a> not my best book, but it certainly is far from
-being my worst. But my opinion regarding my own work is of no value; I do
-not write this Prefatory Note to express it, but to ask my critics and my
-readers to forget the original <i>Vain Fortune</i>, and to read this new
-book as if it were issued under another title.</p>
-
-<p>G.M.</p>
-
-<a name="007.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<a name="008.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<hr>
-
-<h2>I</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">The</span> lamp had not been wiped, and the
-room smelt slightly of paraffin. The old window-curtains, whose harsh green
-age had not softened, were drawn. The mahogany sideboard, the threadbare
-carpet, the small horsehair sofa, the gilt mirror, standing on a white
-marble chimney-piece, said clearly, 'Furnished apartments in a house built
-about a hundred years ago.' There were piles of newspapers, there were
-books on the mahogany sideboard and on the horsehair sofa, and on the table
-there were various manuscripts,&mdash;<i>The Gipsy</i>, Act I.; <i>The
-Gipsy</i>, Act III., Scenes iii. and iv.</p>
-
-<p>A sheet of foolscap paper, and upon it a long slender hand. The hand
-traced a few lines of fine, beautiful caligraphy, then it paused,
-correcting with extreme care <a name="009.png" class="pb"></a> what was
-already written, and in a hesitating, minute way, telling of a brain that
-delighted in the correction rather than in the creation of form.</p>
-
-<p>The shirt-cuff was frayed and dirty. The coat was thin and shiny. A
-half-length figure of a man drew out of the massed shadows between the
-window and sideboard. The red beard caught the light, and the wavy brown
-hair brightened. Then a look of weariness, of distress, passed over the
-face, and the man laid down the pen, and, taking some tobacco from a paper,
-rolled a cigarette. Rising, and leaning forward, he lighted it over the
-lamp. He was a man of about thirty&mdash;six feet, broad-shouldered, well-built,
-healthy, almost handsome.</p>
-
-<p>The time he spent in dreaming his play amounted to six times, if not ten
-times, as much as he devoted to trying to write it; and he now lit
-cigarette after cigarette, abandoning himself to every meditation,&mdash;the
-unpleasantness of life in lodgings, the charm of foreign travel, the beauty
-of the south, what he would do if his play succeeded. He plunged into
-calculation of the time it would take him to finish it if he were to sit at
-home all day, working from seven to ten hours every day. If he could but
-make up his mind concerning the beginning and the middle of the third act,
-and <a name="010.png" class="pb"></a> about the end, too,&mdash;the
-solution,&mdash;he felt sure that, with steady work, the play could be completed
-in a fortnight. In such reverie and such consideration he lay immersed,
-oblivious of the present moment, and did not stir from his chair until the
-postman shook the frail walls with a violent double knock. He hoped for a
-letter, for a newspaper&mdash;either would prove a welcome distraction. The
-servant's footsteps on the stairs told him the post had brought him
-something. His heart sank at the thought that it was probably only a bill,
-and he glanced at all the bills lying one above another on the table.</p>
-
-<p>It was not a bill, nor yet an advertisement, but a copy of a weekly
-review. He tore it open. An article about himself!</p>
-
-<p>After referring to the deplorable condition of the modern stage, the
-writer pointed out how dramatic writing has of late years come to be
-practised entirely by men who have failed in all other branches of
-literature. Then he drew attention to the fact that signs of weariness and
-dissatisfaction with the old stale stories, the familiar tricks in bringing
-about 'striking situations,' were noticeable, not only in the newspaper
-criticisms of new plays, but also among the better portion of the audience.
-He admitted, however, that hitherto the attempts made by younger writers in
-the <a name="011.png" class="pb"></a> direction of new subject-matter and
-new treatment had met with little success. But this, he held, was not a
-reason for discouragement. Did those who believed in the old formulas
-imagine that the new formula would be discovered straight away, without
-failures preliminary? Besides, these attempts were not utterly despicable;
-at least one play written on the new lines had met with some measure of
-success, and that play was Mr. Hubert Price's <i>Divorce</i>.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, the fellow is right. The public is ready for a good play: it
-wasn't when <i>Divorce</i> was given. I must finish <i>The Gipsy</i>. There
-are good things in it; that I know. But I wish I could get that third act
-right. The public will accept a masterpiece, but it will not accept an
-attempt to write a masterpiece. But this time there'll be no falling off in
-the last acts. The scene between the gipsy lover and the young lord will
-fetch 'em.' Taking up the review, Hubert glanced over the article a second
-time. 'How anxious the fellows are for me to achieve a success! How they
-believe in me! They desire it more than I do. They believe in me more than
-I do in myself. They want to applaud me. They are hungry for the
-masterpiece.'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment his eye was caught by some letters written on blue paper.
-His face resumed a wearied <a name="012.png" class="pb"></a> and hunted
-expression. 'There's no doubt about it, money I must get somehow. I am
-running it altogether too fine. There isn't twenty pounds between me and
-the deep sea.'</p>
-
-<div>&nbsp;</div> <!-- pause -->
-
-<p>He was the son of the Rev. James Price, a Shropshire clergyman. The
-family was of Welsh extraction, but in Hubert none of the physical
-characteristics of the Celt appeared. He might have been selected as a
-typical Anglo-Saxon. The face was long and pale, and he wore a short
-reddish beard; the eyes were light blue, verging on grey, and they seemed
-to speak a quiet, steadfast soul. Hubert had always been his mother's
-favourite, and the scorn of his elder brothers, two rough boys, addicted in
-early youth to robbing orchards, and later on to gambling and drinking. The
-elder, after having broken his father's heart with debts and disgraceful
-living, had gone out to the Cape. News of his death came to the Rectory
-soon after; but James's death did not turn Henry from his evil courses, and
-one day his father and mother had to go to London on his account, and they
-brought him back a hopeless invalid. Hubert was twelve years of age when he
-followed his brother to the grave.</p>
-
-<a name="013.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>It was at his brother's funeral that Hubert met for the first time his
-uncle, Mr. Burnett. Mr. Burnett had spent the greater part of his life in
-New Zealand, where he had made a large fortune by sheep-farming and
-investments in land. He had seemed to be greatly taken with his nephew, and
-for many years it was understood that he would leave him the greater part,
-if not the whole, of his fortune. But Mr. Burnett had come under the
-influence of some poor relations, some distant cousins, the Watsons, and
-had eventually decided to adopt their daughter Emily and leave her his
-fortune. He did not dare intimate his change of mind to his sister; but the
-news having reached Mrs. Price in various rumours, she wrote to her brother
-asking him to confirm or deny these rumours; and when he admitted their
-truth, Mrs. Price never spoke to him again. She was a determined woman, and
-the remembrance of the wrong done to her son never left her.</p>
-
-<p>While the other children had been a torment and disgrace, Hubert had
-been to his parents a consolation and a blessing. They had feared that he
-too might turn to betting and drink, but he had never shown sign of low
-tastes. He played no games, nor did he care for terriers or horses; but for
-books and drawing, <a name="014.png" class="pb"></a> and long country
-walks. Immediately on hearing of his disinheritance he had spoken at once
-of entering a profession; and for many months this was the subject of
-consideration in the Rectory. Hubert joined in these discussions willingly,
-but he could not bring himself to accept the army or the bar. It was indeed
-only necessary to look at him to see that neither soldier's tunic nor
-lawyer's wig was intended for him; and it was nearly as clear that those
-earnest eyes, so intelligent and yet so undetermined in their gaze, were
-not those of a doctor.</p>
-
-<p>But if his eyes failed to predict his future, his hands told the story
-of his life distinctly enough&mdash;those long, white, languid hands, what could
-they mean but art? And very soon Hubert began to draw, evincing some
-natural aptitude. Then an artist came into the neighbourhood, the two
-became friends, and went together on a long sketching tour. Life in the
-open air, the shade of the hedge, the glare of the highway, the meditation
-of the field, the languor of the river-side, the contemplation of wooded
-horizons, was what Hubert's pastoral nature was most fitted to enjoy; and,
-for the sake of the life it afforded him, he pursued the calling of a
-landscape painter long after he had begun to feel his desire turning in
-another direction. When <a name="015.png" class="pb"></a> the landscape on
-the canvas seemed hopelessly inadequate, he laid aside the brush for the
-pencil, and strove to interpret the summer fields in verse. From verse he
-drifted into the article and the short story, and from the story into the
-play. And it was in this last form that he felt himself strongest, and
-various were the dramas and comedies that he dreamed from year's end to
-year's end.</p>
-
-<p>While he was in the midst of his period of verse-writing his mother
-died, and in the following year, just as he was working at his stories, he
-received a telegram calling him to attend his father's death-bed. When the
-old man was laid in the shadow of the weather-beaten village church, Hubert
-gathered all his belongings and bade farewell for ever to the Shropshire
-rectory.</p>
-
-<p>In London Hubert made few friends. There were some two or three men with
-whom he was frequently seen&mdash;quiet folk like himself, whose enjoyment
-consisted in smoking a tranquil pipe in the evening, or going for long
-walks in the country. He was one of those men whose indefiniteness provokes
-curiosity, and his friends noticed and wondered why it was that he was so
-frequently the theme of their conversation. His simple, unaffected manners
-were full of suggestion, <a name="016.png" class="pb"></a> and in his
-writings there was always an indefinable rainbow-like promise of ultimate
-achievement. So, long before he had succeeded in writing a play, detached
-scenes and occasional verses led his friends into gradual belief that he
-was one from whom big things might be expected. And when the one-act play
-which they had all so heartily approved of was produced, and every
-newspaper praised it for its literary quality, the friends took pride in
-this public vindication of their opinion. After the production of his play
-people came to see the new author, and every Saturday evening some fifteen
-or twenty men used to assemble in Hubert's lodgings to drink whisky, smoke
-cigars, and talk drama. Encouraged by his success, Hubert wrote
-<i>Divorce</i>. He worked unceasingly upon it for more than a year, and
-when he had written the final scene, he was breaking into his last hundred
-pounds. The play was refused twice, and then accepted by a theatrical
-speculator, to whom it seemed to afford opportunity for the exhibition of
-the talents of a lady he was interested in.</p>
-
-<p>The success of the play was brief. But before it was withdrawn, Hubert
-had sold the American rights for a handsome sum, and within the next two
-years he had completed a second play, which he <a name="017.png"
-class="pb"></a> called <i>An Ebbing Tide</i>. Some of the critics argued
-that it contained scenes as fine as any in <i>Divorce</i>, but it was
-admitted on all sides that the interest withered in the later acts. But the
-failure of the play did not shake the established belief in Hubert's
-genius; it merely concentrated the admiration of those interested in the
-new art upon <i>Divorce</i>, the partial failure of which was now
-attributed to the acting. If it had only been played at the Haymarket or
-the Lyceum, it could not have failed.</p>
-
-<p>The next three years Hubert wasted in various aestheticisms. He
-explained the difference between the romantic and realistic methods in the
-reviews; he played with a poetic drama to be called <i>The King of the
-Beggars</i>, and it was not until the close of the third year that he
-settled down to definite work. Then all his energies were concentrated on a
-new play&mdash;<i>The Gipsy</i>. A young woman of Bohemian origin is suddenly
-taken with the nostalgia of the tent, and leaves her husband and her home
-to wander with those of her race. He had read portions of this play to his
-friends, who at last succeeded in driving Montague Ford, the popular
-actor-manager, to Hubert's door; and after hearing some few scenes he had
-offered a couple of hundred pounds in advance of fees <a name="018.png"
-class="pb"></a> for the completed manuscript. 'But when can I have the
-manuscript?' said Ford, as he was about to leave. 'As soon as I can finish
-it,' Hubert replied, looking at him wistfully out of pale blue-grey eyes.
-'I could finish it in a month, if I could count on not being worried by
-duns or disturbed by friends during that time.'</p>
-
-<p>Ford looked at Hubert questioningly; then he said 'I have always noticed
-that when a fellow wants to finish a play, the only way to do it is to go
-away to the country and leave no address.'</p>
-
-<p>But the country was always so full of pleasure for him, that he doubted
-his power to remain indoors with the temptation of fields and rivers before
-his eyes, and he thought that to escape from dunning creditors it would be
-sufficient to change his address. So he left Norfolk Street for the more
-remote quarter of Fitzroy Street, where he took a couple of rooms on the
-second floor. One of his fellow-lodgers, he soon found, was Rose Massey, an
-actress engaged for the performance of small parts at the Queen's Theatre.
-The first time he spoke to her was on the doorstep. She had forgotten her
-latch-key, and he said, 'Will you allow me to let you in?' She stepped
-aside, but did not answer him. Hubert thought her rude, but her strange
-eyes <a name="019.png" class="pb"></a> and absent-minded manner had piqued
-his curiosity, and, having nothing to do that night, he went to the theatre
-to see her act. She was playing a very small part, and one that was
-evidently unsuited to her&mdash;a part that was in contradiction to her nature;
-but there was something behind the outer envelope which led him to believe
-she had real talent, and would make a name for herself when she was given a
-part that would allow her to reveal what was in her.</p>
-
-<p>In the meantime, Rose had been told that the gentleman she had snubbed
-in the passage was Mr. Hubert Price, the author of <i>Divorce</i>.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, it was very silly of me,' she said to Annie. 'If I had only
-known!'</p>
-
-<p>'Lor', he don't mind; he'll be glad enough to speak to you when you
-meets him again.'</p>
-
-<p>And when they met again on the stairs, Rose nodded familiarly, and
-Hubert said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I went to the Queen's the other night.'</p>
-
-<p>'Did you like the piece?'</p>
-
-<p>'I did not care about the piece; but when you get a wild, passionate
-part to play, you'll make a hit. The sentimental parts they give you don't
-suit you.'</p>
-
-<p>A sudden light came into the languid face. 'Yes, I shall do something if
-I can get a part like that.'</p>
-
-<a name="020.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Hubert told her that he was writing a play containing just such a
-part.</p>
-
-<p>Her eyes brightened again. 'Will you read me the play?' she said, fixing
-her dark, dreamy eyes on him.</p>
-
-<p>'I shall be very glad.... Do you think it won't bore you?' And his
-wistful grey eyes were full of interrogation.</p>
-
-<p>'No, I'm sure it won't.'</p>
-
-<p>And a few days after she sent Annie with a note, reminding him of his
-promise to read her what he had written. As she had only a bedroom, the
-reading had to take place in his sitting-room. He read her the first and
-second acts. She was all enthusiasm, and begged hard to be allowed to study
-the part&mdash;just to see what she could do with it&mdash;just to let him see that
-he was not mistaken in her. Her interest in his work captivated him, and he
-couldn't refuse to lend her the manuscript.</p>
-
-<a name="021.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>II</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Rose</span> often came to see Hubert in his
-rooms. Her manner was disappointing, and he thought he must be mistaken in
-his first judgment of her talents. But one afternoon she gave him a
-recitation of the sleep-walking scene in <i>Macbeth</i>. It was strange to
-see this little dark-complexioned, dark-eyed girl, the merest handful of
-flesh and bone, divest herself at will of her personality, and assume the
-tragic horror of Lady Macbeth, or the passionate rapture of Juliet
-detaining her husband-lover on the balcony of her chamber. Hubert watched
-in wonderment this girl, so weak and languid in her own nature, awaking
-only to life when she assumed the personality of another. There she lay,
-her wispy form stretched in his arm-chair, her great dark eyes fixed, her
-mind at rest, sunk in some inscrutable dream. Her thin hand lay on the arm
-of the chair: when she woke from her day-dream she burst into irresponsible
-laughter, or questioned him with petulant curiosity. He looked again: her
-dark curling <a name="022.png" class="pb"></a> hair hung on her swarthy
-neck, and she was somewhat untidily dressed in blue linen.</p>
-
-<p>'Were you ever in love?' she said suddenly. 'I don't suppose you could
-be; you are too occupied with your play. I don't know, though; you might be
-in love, but I don't think that many women would be in love with you....
-You are too good a man, and women don't like good men.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert laughed, and without a trace of offended vanity in his voice he
-said, 'I don't profess to be much of a lady-killer.'</p>
-
-<p>'You don't know what I mean,' she said, looking at him fixedly, a maze
-of half-childish, half-artistic curiosity in her handsome eyes.</p>
-
-<p>Perplexed in his shy, straightford nature, Hubert inquired if she took
-sugar in her tea. She said she did; stretched her feet to the fire, and
-lapsed into dream. She was one of the enigmas of Stageland. She supported
-herself, and went about by herself, looking a poor, lost little thing. She
-spoke with considerable freedom of language on all subjects, but no one had
-been able to fix a lover upon her.</p>
-
-<p>'What a part Lady Hayward is! But tell me,&mdash;I don't quite catch your
-meaning in the second act. Is this it?' and starting to her feet, she
-became in a <a name="023.png" class="pb"></a> moment another being. With a
-gesture, a look, an intonation, she was the woman of the play,&mdash;a woman
-taken by an instinct, long submerged, but which has floated to the surface,
-and is beginning to command her actions. In another moment she had slipped
-back into her weary lymphatic nature, at once prematurely old and
-extravagantly childish. She could not talk of indifferent things; and
-having asked some strange questions, and laughed loudly, she wished Hubert
-'Good-afternoon' in her curious, irresponsible fashion, taking her leave
-abruptly.</p>
-
-<p>The next two days Hubert devoted entirely to his play. There were things
-in it which he knew were good, but it was incomplete. Montague Ford would
-not produce it in its present form. He must put his shoulder to the wheel
-and get it right; one more push, that was all that was wanted. And he could
-be heard walking to and fro, up and down, along and across his tiny
-sitting-room, stopping suddenly to take a note of an idea that had occurred
-to him.</p>
-
-<p>One day he went to Hampstead Heath. A long walk, he thought, would clear
-his mind, and he returned home thinking of his play. The sunset still
-glittering in the skies; the bare trees were beautifully distinct on the
-blue background of the suburban street, <a name="024.png" class="pb"></a>
-and at the end of the long perspective, a 'bus and a hansom could be seen
-coming towards him. As they grew larger, his thoughts defined themselves,
-and the distressing problem of his fourth act seemed to solve itself. That
-very evening he would sketch out a new dramatic movement around which all
-the other movements of the act would cluster. But at the corner of Fitzroy
-Square, within a few yards of No. 17, he was accosted by a shabbily-dressed
-man, who inquired if he were Mr. Price. On being answered in the
-affirmative, the shabbily-dressed man said, 'Then I have something for ye;
-I have been a-watching for ye for the last three days, but ye didn't come
-out; missed yer this morning: 'ere it is;' and he thrust a folded paper
-into Hubert's hand.</p>
-
-<p>'What is this?'</p>
-
-<p>'Don't yer know?' he said with a grin; 'Messrs. Tomkins &amp; Co.,
-Tailors, writ&mdash;twenty-two pound odd.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert made no answer; he put the paper in his pocket, opened the door
-quietly, stole up to his room, and sat down to think. The first thing to do
-was to examine into his finances. It was alarming to find that he was
-breaking into his last five-pound note. True that he was close on the end
-of his play, and when it was finished he would be able to draw on Ford. But
-a <a name="025.png" class="pb"></a> summons to appear in the county court
-could not fail to do him immense injury. He had heard of avoiding service,
-but he knew little of the law, and wondered what power the service of the
-writ gave his creditor over him. His instinct was to escape&mdash;hide himself
-where they would not be able to find him, and so obtain time to finish his
-play. But he owed his landlady money, and his departure would have to be
-clandestine. As he reflected on how many necessaries he might carry away in
-a newspaper, he began to feel strangely like a criminal, and while rolling
-up a couple of shirts, a few pairs of socks, and some collars, he paused,
-his hands resting on the parcel. He did not seem to know himself, and it
-was difficult to believe that he really intended to leave the house in this
-disreputable fashion. Mechanically he continued to add to his parcel,
-thinking all the while that he must go, otherwise his play would never be
-written.</p>
-
-<p>He had been working very well for the last few days, and now he saw his
-way quite clearly; the inspiration he had been so long waiting for had come
-at last, and he felt sure of his fourth act. At the same time he wished to
-conduct himself honestly, even in this distressing situation. Should he
-tell his landlady the truth? But the desire to realise his idea was
-intolerable, <a name="026.png" class="pb"></a> and, yielding as if before
-an irresistible force, he tied the parcel and prepared to go. At that
-moment he remembered that he must leave a note for his landlady, and he was
-more than ever surprised at the naturalness with which lying phrases came
-into his head. But when it came to committing them to paper, he found he
-could not tell an absolute lie, and he wrote a simple little note to the
-effect that he had been called away on urgent business, and hoped to return
-in about a week.</p>
-
-<p>He descended the stairs softly. Mrs. Wilson's sitting-room opened on to
-the passage; she might step out at any moment, and intercept his exit. He
-had nearly reached the last flight when he remembered that he had forgotten
-his manuscripts. His flesh turned cold, his heart stood still. There was
-nothing for it but to ascend those creaking stairs again. His already
-heavily encumbered pockets could not be persuaded to receive more than a
-small portion of the manuscripts. He gathered them in his hand, and
-prepared to redescend the perilous stairs. He walked as lightly as
-possible, dreading that every creak would bring Mrs. Wilson from her
-parlour. A few more steps, and he would be in the passage. A smell of dust,
-sounds of children crying, children talking in the kitchen! A few more
-steps, and, with his eyes on the parlour door, <a name="027.png"
-class="pb"></a> Hubert had reached the rug at the foot of the stairs. He
-hastened along, the passage. Mrs. Wilson was a moment too late. His hand
-was on the street-door when she appeared at the door of her parlour.</p>
-
-<p>'Mr. Price, I want to speak to you before you go out. There has&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I can't wait&mdash;running to catch a train. You'll find a letter on my
-table. It will explain.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert slipped out, closed the door, and ran down the street, and it was
-not until he had put two or three streets between him and Fitzroy Street
-that he relaxed his pace, and could look behind him without dreading to
-feel the hand of the 'writter' upon his shoulder.</p>
-
-<a name="028.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>III</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Then</span> he wandered, not knowing where he
-was going, still in the sensation of his escape, a little amused, and yet
-with a shadow of fear upon his soul, for he grew more and more conscious of
-the fact that he was homeless, if not quite penniless. Suddenly he stopped
-walking. Night was thickening in the street, and he had to decide where he
-would sleep. He could not afford to pay more than five or six shillings a
-week for a room, and he thought of Holloway, as being a neighbourhood where
-creditors would not be able to find him. So he retraced his steps, and,
-tired and footsore, entered the Tottenham Court Road by the Oxford Street
-end.</p>
-
-<p>There the omnibuses stopped. A conductor shouted for fares, with the
-light of the public-house lamps on his open mouth. There was smell of mud,
-of damp clothes, of bad tobacco, and where the lights of the costermongers'
-barrows broke across the footway the picture was of a group of three
-coarse, loud-voiced girls, <a name="029.png" class="pb"></a> followed by
-boys. There were fish shops, cheap Italian restaurants, and the long lines
-of low houses vanished in crapulent night. The characteristics of the
-Tottenham Court Road impressed themselves on Hubert's mind, and he thought
-how he would have to bear for at least three weeks with all the grime of
-its poverty. It would take about that time to finish his play, and the
-neighbourhood would suit his purpose excellently well. So long as he did
-not pass beyond it he ran little risk of discovery, and to secure himself
-against friends and foes he penetrated farther northward, not stopping till
-he reached the confines of Holloway.</p>
-
-<p>Then a little dim street caught his eye, and he knocked at the door of
-the first house exhibiting a card in the parlour window. But they did not
-let their bedroom under seven shillings, and this seemed to Hubert to be an
-extravagant price. He tried farther on, and at last found a clean room for
-six shillings. Having no luggage, he paid a week's rent in advance, and the
-landlady promised to get him a small table, on which he could write, a
-small table that would fit in somewhere near the window. She asked him when
-he would like to be called, and put the candlestick on the chair. Hubert
-looked round the room, and a moment sufficed to complete the survey. It was
-about seven <a name="030.png" class="pb"></a> feet long. The lower half of
-the window was curtained by a piece of muslin hardly bigger than a
-good-sized pocket-handkerchief; to do anything in this room except to lie
-in bed seemed difficult, and Hubert sat down on the bed and emptied out his
-pockets. He had just four pounds, and the calculation how long he could
-live on such a sum took him some time. His breakfast, whether he had it at
-home or in the coffee-house, would cost him at least fourpence. He thought
-he would be able to obtain a fairly good dinner in one of the little
-Italian restaurants for ninepence. His tea would cost the same as his
-breakfast. To these sums he must add twopence for tobacco and a penny for
-an evening paper&mdash;impossible to do without tobacco, and he must know what
-was going on in the world. He could therefore live for one shilling and
-eightpence a day&mdash;eleven shillings a week&mdash;to which he would have to add
-six shillings a week for rent, altogether seventeen shillings a week. He
-really did not see how he could do it cheaper. Four times seventeen are
-sixty-eight; sixty-eight shillings for a month of life, and he had eighty
-shillings&mdash;twelve shillings for incidental expenses; and out of that twelve
-shillings he must buy a shirt, a sponge, and a tooth brush, and when they
-were bought there would be very little left. He must finish his <a
-name="031.png" class="pb"></a> play under the month. Nothing could be
-clearer than that.</p>
-
-<p>Next morning he asked the landlady to let him have a cup of tea and some
-bread and butter, and he ate as much bread as he could, to save himself
-from being hungry in the middle of the day. He began work immediately, and
-continued until seven, and feeling then somewhat light-headed, but
-satisfied with himself, went to the nearest Italian restaurant. The food
-was better than he expected; but he spent twopence more than he had
-intended, so, to accustom himself to a life of strict measure and
-discipline, he determined to forego his tea that evening. And so he lived
-and worked until the end of the week.</p>
-
-<p>But the situation he had counted on to complete his fourth act had
-proved almost impracticable in the working out; he laboured on, however,
-and at the end of the tenth day at least one scene satisfied him. He read
-it over slowly, carefully, thought about it, decided that it was excellent,
-and lay down on his bed to consider it. At that moment it struck him that
-he had better calculate how much he had spent in the last ten days. He
-gathered himself into a sitting posture and counted his money; he had spent
-thirty shillings, and at that rate his money would not hold out till the
-end <a name="032.png" class="pb"></a> of the month. He must reduce his
-expenditure; but how? Impossible to find a room where he could live more
-cheaply than in the one he had got, and it is not easy to dine in London on
-less than ninepence. Only the poor can live cheaply. He pressed his hands
-to his face. His head seemed like splitting, and his monetary difficulty,
-united with his literary difficulties, produced a momentary insanity. Work
-that morning was impossible, so he went out to study the eating-houses of
-the neighbourhood. He must find one where he could dine for sixpence. Or he
-might buy a pound of cooked beef and take it home with him in a paper bag;
-but that would seem an almost intolerable imprisonment in his little room.
-He could go to a public-house and dine off a sausage and potato. But at
-that moment his attention was caught by black letters on a dun, yellowish
-ground: 'Lockhart's Cocoa Rooms.' Not having breakfasted, he decided to
-have a cup of cocoa and a roll.</p>
-
-<p>It was a large, barn-like place, the walls covered with a coat of
-grey-blue paint. Under the window there was a zinc counter, with zinc urns
-always steaming, emiting odours of tea, coffee, and cocoa. The seats were
-like those which give a garden-like appearance to the tops of some
-omnibuses. Each was made to hold <a name="033.png" class="pb"></a> two
-persons, and the table between them was large enough for four plates and
-four pairs of hands. A few hollow-chested men, the pale vagrants of
-civilisation, drowsed in the corners. They had been hunted through the
-night by the policeman, and had come in for something hot. Hubert noted the
-worn frock-coats, and the miserable arms coming out of shirtless sleeves.
-One looked up inquiringly, and Hubert thought how slight had become the
-line that divided him from the outcast. A serving-maid collected the
-plates, knives and forks, when the customers left, and carried them back to
-the great zinc counter.</p>
-
-<p>Impressed by his appearance, she brought him what he had ordered and
-took the money for it, although the custom of the place was for the
-customer to pay for food at the counter and carry it himself to the table
-at which he chose to eat. Hubert learnt that there was no set dinner, but
-there was a beef-steak pudding at one, price fourpence, a penny potatoes, a
-penny bread. So by dining at Lockhart's he would be able to cut down his
-daily expense by at least twopence; that would extend the time to finish
-his play by nearly a week. And if his appetite were not keen, he could
-assuage it with a penny plum pudding; or he could take a middle course,
-making his dinner off a sausage <a name="034.png" class="pb"></a> and
-mashed potatoes. The room was clean, well lighted, and airy; he could read
-his paper there, and forget his troubles in the observation of character.
-He even made friends. An old wizen creature, who had been a prize-fighter,
-told him of his triumphs. If he hadn't broke his hand on somebody's nose
-he'd have been champion light-weight of England. 'And to think that I have
-come to this,' he added emphatically. 'Even them boys knock me about now,
-and 'alf a century ago I could 'ave cleared the bloomin' place.' There was
-a merry little waif from the circus who loved to come and sit with Hubert.
-She had been a rider, she said, but had broken her leg on one occasion, and
-cut her head all open on another, and had ended by running away with some
-one who had deserted her. 'So here I am,' she remarked, with a burst of
-laughter, 'talking to you. Did you never hear of Dolly Dayrell?' Hubert
-confessed that he had not. 'Why,' she said, 'I thought every one had.'</p>
-
-<p>About eight o'clock in the evening, the table near the stairs was
-generally occupied by flower-girls, dressed in dingy clothes, and brightly
-feathered hats. They placed their empty baskets on the floor, and shouted
-at their companions&mdash;men who sold newspapers, boot-laces, and cheap toys.
-About nine the boys came in, <a name="035.png" class="pb"></a> the boys who
-used to push the old prize-fighter about, and Hubert soon began to perceive
-how representative they were of all vices&mdash;gambling, theft, idleness, and
-cruelty were visible in their faces. They were led by a Jew boy who sold
-penny jewellery at the corner of Oxford Street, and they generally made for
-the tables at the end of the room, for there, unless custom was slack
-indeed, they could defeat the vigilance of the serving-maid and play at nap
-at their ease. The tray of penny jewellery was placed at the corner of a
-table, and a small boy set to watch over it. His duty was also to shuffle
-his feet when the servant-maid approached, and a precious drubbing he got
-if he failed to shuffle them loud enough. The ''ot un,' as he was
-nicknamed, always had a pack of cards in his pocket, and to annex
-everything left on the tables he considered to be his privilege. One day,
-when he was asked how he came by the fine carnation in his buttonhole, he
-said it was a present from Sally, neglecting to add that he had told the
-child to steal it from a basket which a flower-girl had just put down.</p>
-
-<a name="036.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<div class="image"><a href="images/image02.jpeg"><img src="images/image02-thumb.jpeg"
-align="left" alt="[drawing]"></a>
-
-"'A dirty, hignominious lot, them boys is.'"</div>
-
-<br>
-
-<a name="037.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<a name="038.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Hubert hated this boy, and once could not resist boxing his ears. The
-''ot un' writhed easily out of his reach, and then assailed him with foul
-language, and so loud were his words that they awoke the innocent cause of
-the quarrel, a weak, sickly-looking man, with pale blue eyes and a blonde
-beard. Hubert had protected him before now against the brutality of the
-boys, who, when they were not playing nap, divided their pleasantries
-between him and the decrepit prize-fighter. He came in about nine, took a
-cup of coffee from the counter, and settled himself for a snooze. The boys
-knew this, and it was their amusement to keep him awake by pelting him with
-egg-shells and other missiles. Hubert noticed that he had always with him a
-red handkerchief full of some sort of loose rubbish, which the boys
-gathered when it fell about the floor, or purloined from the handkerchief
-when they judged that the owner was sufficiently fast asleep. Hubert now
-saw that the handkerchief was filled with bits of coloured chalk, and
-guessed that the man must be a pavement artist.</p>
-
-<p>'A dirty, hignominious lot, them boys is,' said the artist, fixing his
-pale, melancholy eyes on Hubert; 'bad manners, no eddication, and, above
-all, no respect.'</p>
-
-<p>'They are an unmannerly lot&mdash;that Jew boy especially. I don't think
-there's a vice he hasn't got.'</p>
-
-<p>The artist stared at Hubert a long time in silence. A thought seemed to
-be stirring in his mind.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm speaking, I can see, to a man of eddication. <a name="039.png"
-class="pb"></a> I'm a fust-rate judge of character, though I be but a
-pavement artist; but a picture's none the less a picture, no matter where
-it is drawn. That's true, ain't it?'</p>
-
-<p>'Quite true. A horse is a horse, and an ass is an ass, no matter what
-stable you put them into.'</p>
-
-<p>The artist laughed a guttural laugh, and, fixing his pale blue porcelain
-eyes on Hubert, he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; see I made no bloomin' error when I said you was a man of
-eddication. A literary gent, I should think. In the reporting line, most
-like. Down in the luck like myself. What was it&mdash;drink? Got the chuck?'</p>
-
-<p>'No,' said Hubert, 'never touch it. Out of work.'</p>
-
-<p>'No offence, master, we're all mortal, we is all weak, and in misfortune
-we goes to it. It was them boys that drove me to it.'</p>
-
-<p>'How was that?'</p>
-
-<p>'They was always round my show; no getting rid of them, and their
-remarks created a disturbance; the perlice said he wouldn't 'ave it, and
-when the perlice won't 'ave it, what's a poor man to do? They are that
-hignorant. But what's the use of talking of it, it only riles me.' The
-blue-eyed man lay back in his seat, and his head sank on his chest. He
-looked as if he were going to sleep again, but on Hubert's asking him to
-explain his troubles, he leaned across the table.</p>
-
-<a name="040.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Well, I'll tell yer. Yer be an eddicated man, and I likes to talk to
-them that 'as 'ad an eddication. Yer says, and werry truly, just now, that
-changing the stable don't change an 'orse into a hass, or a hass into an
-'orse. That is werry true, most true, none but a eddicated man could 'ave
-made that 'ere hobservation. I likes yer for it. Give us yer 'and. The
-public just thinks too much of the stable, and not enough of what's inside.
-Leastways that's my experience of the public, and I 'ave been a-catering
-for the public ever since I was a growing lad&mdash;sides of bacon, ships on
-fire, good old ship on fire.... I knows the public. Yer don't follow
-me?'</p>
-
-<p>'Not quite.'</p>
-
-<p>'A moment, and I'll explain. You'll admit there's no blooming reason
-except the public's blooming hignorance why a man shouldn't do as good a
-picture on the pavement as on a piece of canvas, provided he 'ave the
-blooming genius. There is no doubt that with them 'ere chalks and a nice
-smooth stone that Raphael&mdash;I 'ave been to the National Gallery and 'ave
-studied 'is work, and werry fine some of it is, although I don't altogether
-hold&mdash;but that's another matter. What was I a-saying of? I remember,&mdash;that
-with them 'ere chalks, and a nice smooth stone, there's no reason why <a
-name="041.png" class="pb"></a> a masterpiece shouldn't be done. That's
-right, ain't it? I ask you, as a man of eddication, to say if that ain't
-right; as a representative of the Press, I asks you to say.' Hubert nodded,
-and the pale-eyed man continued. 'Well, that's what the public won't see,
-can't see. Raphael, says I, could 'ave done a masterpiece with them 'ere
-chalks and a nice smooth stone. But do yer think 'e 'd 'ave been allowed?
-Do yer think the perlice would 'ave stood it? Do yer think the public would
-'ave stood him doing masterpieces on the pavement? I'd give 'im just one
-afternoon. Them boys would 'ave got 'im into trouble, just as they did me.
-Raphael would 'ave been told to wipe them out just as I was.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused; and, half amused, half frightened, Hubert
-considered the pale vague face, and he was struck by the scattered look of
-aspiration that wandered in the pale blue eyes.</p>
-
-<p>'I'll tell you,' said the man, growing more excited, and leaning further
-across the table; 'I'll tell you, because I knows you for an eddicated man,
-and won't blab. S'pose yer thinks, like the rest of the world, that the
-chaps wot smears, for it ain't drawing, the pavement with bits of bacon, a
-ship on fire, and the regulation oysters, does them out of their own
-'eads?' Hubert nodded. 'I'm not surprised that you do, all the world do,
-and <a name="042.png" class="pb"></a> the public chucks down its coppers to
-the poor hartist; but 'e aint no hartist, no more than is them 'ere boys
-that did for my show.' Leaning still further forward, he lowered his voice
-to a whisper. 'They learns it all by 'art; there is schools for the
-teaching of it down in Whitechapel. They can just do what they learns by
-'art, not one of them could draw that 'ere chair or table from natur'; but
-I could. I 'ave an original talent. It was a long time afore I found out it
-was there,' he said, tapping his forehead; 'but it is there,' he said,
-fixing his eyes on Hubert, 'and when it is there they can't take it away&mdash;I
-mean my mates&mdash;though they do laugh at my ideas. They call me "the genius,"
-for they don't believe in me, but I believe in myself, and they laughs best
-that laughs last.... I don't know,' he said, looking round him, his eyes
-full of reverie, 'that the public liked my fancy landscapes better than the
-ship on fire, but I said the public will come to them in time, and I
-continued my fancy landscapes. But one day in Trafalgar Square it came on
-to rain very 'eavy, and I went for shelter into the National Gallery. It
-was my fust visit, and I was struck all of a 'eap, and ever since I can
-'ardly bring myself to go on with the drudgery of the piece of bacon, and
-the piece of cheese, with the mouse nibbling at it. And ever since my <a
-name="043.png" class="pb"></a> 'ead 'as been filled with other things,
-though for a long time I could not make exactly out what. I 'ave 'eard that
-that is always the case with men that 'as an idea&mdash;daresay you 'ave found
-it so yourself. So in my spare time I goes to the National to think it out,
-and in studying the pictures there I got wery interested in a chap called
-Hetty, and 'e do paint the female form divine. I says to myself, Why not go
-in for lovely woman? the public may not care for fancy landscapes, but the
-public allus likes a lovely woman, and, as well as being popular, lovely
-woman is 'igh 'art. So, after dinner hour, I sets to work, and sketches in
-a blue sea with three bathers, and two boxes, with the 'orse's head looking
-out from behind one of the boxes. For a fust attempt at the nude, I assure
-you&mdash;it ain't my way to blow my own trumpet, but I can say that the crowd
-that 'ere picture did draw was bigger than any that 'ad assembled about the
-bits o' bacon and ship-a-fire of all the other coves. 'Ad I been let alone,
-I should 'ave made my fortune, but the crowd was so big and the curiosity
-so great that it took the perlice all their time to keep the pavement from
-being blocked. It wasn't that the public didn't like it enough, it was that
-the public liked it too much, that was the reason of my misfortune.'</p>
-
-<a name="044.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'What do you mean?' said Hubert.</p>
-
-<p>'Well, yer see them boys was a-hawking their cheap toys in the
-neighbourhood, and when they got wind of my success they comes round to
-see, and they remains on account of the crowd. Pockets was picked, I don't
-say they wasn't, and the perlice turned rusty, and then a pious old gent
-comes along, and 'earing the remarks of them boys, which I admit wasn't
-nice, complains to the hauthorities, and I was put down! Now, what I wants
-to know is why my art should be made to suffer for the beastly-mindedness
-of them 'ere boys.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert admitted that there seemed to be an injustice somewhere, and
-asked the artist if he had never tried again.</p>
-
-<p>'Try again? Should think I did. When once a man 'as tasted of 'igh art,
-he can't keep his blooming fingers out of it. It was impossible after the
-success of my bathers to go back to the bacon, so I thought I would
-circumvent the hauthorities. I goes to the National Gallery, makes a
-sketch, 'ere it is,' and after some fumbling in his breast pocket, he
-produced a greasy piece of paper, which he handed to Hubert. 'S'pose yer
-know the picture?' Hubert admitted that he did not. 'Well, that is a
-drawing from Gainsborough's celebrated picture of Medora a-washing of <a
-name="045.png" class="pb"></a> her feet.... But the perlice wouldn't 'ave
-it any more than my original, 'e said it was worse than the bathers at
-Margaret, and when I told the hignorant brute wot it was, 'e said he wanted
-no hargument, that 'e wouldn't 'ave it.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert had noticed, during the latter part of the narrative, a look of
-dubious cunning twinkling in the pale eyes; but now this look died away,
-and the eyes resumed their habitual look of vague reverie.</p>
-
-<p>'I've been 'ad up before the Beak: from him I expected more
-enlightenment, but he, too, said 'e wouldn't 'ave it, and I got a month.
-But I'll beat them yet, the public is on my side, and if it worn't for them
-'ere boys, I'd say that the public could be helevated. They calls me "the
-genius," and they is right.' Then something seemed to go out like a flame,
-the face grew dim, and changed expression. 'It is 'ere all right,' he said,
-no longer addressing Hubert, but speaking to himself, 'and since it is
-there, it must come out.'</p>
-
-<a name="046.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>IV</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Hubert</span> at last found himself obliged to
-write to Ford for an advance of money. But Ford replied that he would
-advance money only on the delivery of the completed manuscript. And the
-whole of one night, in a room hardly eight feet long, sitting on his bed,
-he strove to complete the fourth and fifth acts. But under the pressure of
-such necessity ideas died within him. And all through the night, and even
-when the little window, curtained with a bit of muslin hardly bigger than a
-pocket-handkerchief, had grown white with dawn, he sat gazing at the sheet
-of paper, his brain on fire, unable to think. Laying his pen down in
-despair, he thought of the thousands who would come to his aid if they only
-knew&mdash;if they only knew! And soon after he heard life beginning again in
-the little brick street. He felt that his brain was giving way, that if he
-did not find change, whatever it was, he must surely run raving mad. He had
-had enough of England, and would leave it for America, Australia<a
-name="047.png" class="pb"></a>&mdash;anywhere. He wanted change. The present was
-unendurable. How would he get to America? Perhaps a clerkship on board one
-of the great steamships might be obtained.</p>
-
-<p>The human animal in extreme misery becomes self-reliant, and Hubert
-hardly thought of making application to his uncle. The last time he had
-applied for help his letter had remained unanswered, and he now felt that
-he must make his own living or die. And, quite indifferent as to what might
-befall him, he walked next day to the Victoria Docks. He did not know where
-or how to apply for work, and he tired himself in fruitless endeavour. At
-last he felt he could strive with fate no longer, and wandered mile after
-mile, amused and forgetful of his own misery in the spectacle of the
-river&mdash;the rose sky, the long perspectives, the houses and warehouses
-showing in fine outline, and then the wonderful blue night gathering in the
-forest of masts and rigging. He was admirably patient. There was no
-fretfulness in his soul, nor did he rail against the world's injustice, but
-took his misfortunes with sweet gentleness.</p>
-
-<p>He slept in a public-house, and next day resumed his idle search for
-employment. The weather was mild and beautiful, his wants were simple, a
-cup of coffee <a name="048.png" class="pb"></a> and a roll, a couple of
-sausages, and the day passed in a sort of morose and passionless
-contemplation. He thought of everything and nothing, least of all of how he
-should find money for the morrow. When the day came, and the penny to buy a
-cup of coffee was wanting, he quite naturally, without giving it a second
-thought, engaged himself as a labourer, and worked all day carrying sacks
-of grain out of a vessel's hold. For a large part of his nature was patient
-and simple, docile as an animal's. There was in him so much that was
-rudimentary, that in accepting this burden of physical toil he was acting
-not in contradiction to, but in full and perfect harmony with, his true
-nature.</p>
-
-<p>But at the end of a week his health began to give way, and, like a man
-after a violent debauch, he thought of returning to a more normal
-existence. He had left the manuscript of his unfortunate play in the North.
-Had they destroyed it? The involuntary fear of the writer for his child
-made him smile. What did it matter? Clearly the first thing to do would be
-to write to the editor of <i>The Cosmopolitan</i>, and ask if he could find
-him some employment, something certain; writing occasional articles for
-newspapers, that he couldn't do.</p> <a name="049.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Hubert had saved twelve shillings. He would therefore be able to pay his
-landlady: he smiled&mdash;one of his landladies! The earlier debt was now
-hopelessly out of his reach, and seemed to represent a social plane from
-which he had for ever fallen. If he had succeeded in getting that play
-right, what a difference it would have made! He would have been able to do
-a number of things he had never done, things which he had always desired to
-do. He had desired above all to travel&mdash;to see France and Italy; to linger,
-to muse in the shadows of the world's past; and after this he had desired
-marriage, an English wife, an English home, beautiful children, leisure,
-the society of friends. A successful play would have given him all these
-things, and now his dream must remain for ever unrealised by him. He had
-sunk out of sight and hearing of such life.</p>
-
-<p>Rose was another; she might sink as he had sunk; she might never find
-the opportunity of realising her desire. How well she would have played
-that part! He knew what was in her. And now! What did his failure to write
-that play condemn him to? Heaven only knows, he did not wish to think.
-Strange, was it not strange?... A man of genius&mdash;many believed him a
-genius&mdash;and yet he was incapable of earning his <a name="050.png"
-class="pb"></a> daily bread otherwise than by doing the work of a navvy.
-Even that he could not do well, society had softened his muscles and
-effeminised his constitution. Indeed, he did not know what life fate had
-willed him for. He seemed to be out of place everywhere. His best chance
-was to try to obtain a clerkship. The editor of <i>The Cosmopolitan</i>
-might be able to do that for him; if he could not, far better it would be
-to leave a world in which he was <i>out of place</i>, and through no fault
-of his own&mdash;that was the hard part of it. Hard part! Nonsense! What does
-Fate know of our little rights and wrongs&mdash;or care? Her intentions are
-inscrutable; she watches us come and go, and gives no sign. Prayers are
-vain. The good man is punished, and the wicked is sent on his way
-rejoicing.</p>
-
-<p>In such mournful thought, his clothes stained and torn, with all the
-traces of a week's toil in the docks upon them, Hubert made his way round
-St. Paul's and across Holborn. As he was about to cross into Oxford Street,
-he heard some one accost him,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, Mr. Price, is that you?' It was Rose. 'Where have you been all this
-time?'</p>
-
-<p>She seemed so strange, so small, and so much alone in the great
-thoroughfare, that Hubert forgot all his own troubles in a sudden interest
-in this little mite. <a name="051.png" class="pb"></a> 'Where have you been
-hiding yourself?... It is lucky I met you. Don't you know that Ford has
-decided to revive <i>Divorce</i>?'</p>
-
-<p>'You don't mean it!'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; Ford said that the last acts of <i>The Gipsy</i> were not
-satisfactorily worked out, and as there was something wrong with that
-Hamilton Brown's piece, he has decided to revive <i>Divorce</i>. He says it
-never was properly played ... he thinks he'll make a hit in the husband's
-part, and I daresay he will. But I have been unfortunate again; I wanted
-the part of the adventuress. I really could play it. I don't look it, I
-know ... I have no weight, but I could play it for all that. The public
-mightn't see me in it at first, but in five minutes they would.'</p>
-
-<p>'And what part has he cast you for&mdash;the young girl?'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course; there's no other part. He says I look it; but what's the
-good of looking it when you don't feel it? If he had cast me for Mrs.
-Barrington, I should have had just the five minutes in the second act that
-I have been waiting for so long, and I should have just wiped Miss Osborne
-out, acted her off the stage.... I know I should; you needn't believe it if
-don't like, but I know I should.'</p>
-
-<a name="052.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Hubert wondered how any one could feel so sure of herself, and then he
-said, 'Yes, I think you could do just what you say.... How do you think
-Miss Osborne will play the part?'</p>
-
-<p>'She'll be correct enough; she'll miss nothing, and yet somehow she'll
-miss the whole thing. But you must go at once to Ford. He was saying only
-this morning that if you didn't turn up soon, he'd have to give up the
-idea.'</p>
-
-<p>'I can't go and see him to-night. You see what a state I'm in.'</p>
-
-<p>'You're rather dusty; where have you been? what have you been
-doing?'</p>
-
-<p>'I've been down at the dock.... I thought of going to America.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, we'll talk about that another time. It doesn't matter if you are
-a bit dusty and worn-out-looking. Now that he's going to revive your play,
-he'll let you have some money. You might get a new hat, though. I don't
-know how much they cost, but I've five shillings; can you get one for
-that?'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert thanked her.</p>
-
-<p>'But you are not offended?'</p>
-
-<p>'Offended, my dear Rose! I shall be able to manage. I'll get a brush up
-somewhere.'</p>
-
-<a name="053.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'That's all right. Now I'm going to jump into that 'bus,' and she signed
-with her parasol to the conductor. 'Mind you see Ford to-night,' she cried;
-and a moment after he saw a small space of blue back seated against one of
-the windows.</p>
-
-<a name="054.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>V</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">There</span> was much prophecy abroad.
-Stiggins' words, 'The piece never did, and never will draw money,' were
-evidently present in everybody's mind. They were visible in Ford's face,
-and more than once Hubert expected to hear that&mdash;on account of severe
-indisposition&mdash;Mr. Montague Ford has been obliged to indefinitely postpone
-his contemplated revival of Mr. Hubert Price's play <i>Divorce</i>. But,
-besides the apprehension that Stiggins' unfavourable opinion of his
-enterprise had engendered in him, Ford was obviously provoked by Hubert's
-reluctance to execute the alterations he had suggested. Night after night,
-sometimes until six in the morning, Hubert sat up considering them. Thanks
-to Ford's timely advance he was back in his old rooms in Fitzroy Street.
-All was as it had been. He was working at his play every evening, waiting
-for Rose's footsteps on the stairs. And yet a change had come into his
-life! He believed now that his feet were set on the way to fortune&mdash;that he
-would soon be happy.</p>
-
-<a name="055.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>He stared at the bright flame of the lamp, he listened to the silence.
-The clock chimed sharply, and the windows were growing grey. Hubert had
-begun to drowse in his chair; but he had promised to rewrite the young
-girl's part, Ford having definitely refused to intrust Rose with the part
-of the adventuress. He was sorry for this. He believed that Rose had not
-only talent, but genius. Besides, they were friends, neighbours; he would
-like to give her a chance of distinguishing herself&mdash;the chance which she
-was seeking. All the time he could not but realise that, however he might
-accentuate and characterise the part of the sentimental girl, Rose would
-not be able to do much with it. To bring out her special powers something
-strange, wild, or tragic was required. But of what use thinking of what was
-not to be? Having made some alterations and additions he folded his papers
-up, and addressed them to Miss Massey. He wrote on a piece of paper that
-they were to be given to her at once, and that he was to be called at ten.
-There was a rehearsal at twelve.</p>
-
-<p>On the night of the first performance, Hubert asked Rose to dine in his
-rooms. Mr. Wilson proposed that they should have a roast chicken, and Annie
-was sent to fetch a bottle of champagne from the <a name="056.png"
-class="pb"></a> grocer's. Annie had been given a ticket for the pit. Mrs.
-Wilson was going to the upper boxes. Annie said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Why, you look as if you was going to a funeral, and not to a play. Why
-don't ye laugh?'</p>
-
-<p>In truth, Hubert and Rose were a little silent. Rose was thinking how
-she could say certain lines. She had said them right once at rehearsal, but
-had not since been able to reproduce to her satisfaction a certain effect
-of voice. Hubert was too nervous to talk. There was nothing in his mind but
-'Will the piece succeed? What shall I do if it fails?' He could give heed
-to nothing but himself, all the world seemed blotted out, and he suffered
-the pain of excessive self-concentration. Rose, on the other hand, had lost
-sight of herself, and existed almost unconsciously in the soul of another
-being. She was sometimes like a hypnotised spectator watching with foolish,
-involuntary curiosity the actions of one whom she had been bidden to watch.
-Then a little cloud would gather over her eyes, and then this other being
-would rise as if out of her very entrails and recreate her, fashioning her
-to its own image and likeness.</p>
-
-<p>She did not answer when she was spoken to, and <a name="057.png"
-class="pb"></a> when the question was repeated, she awoke with a little
-start. Dinner was eaten in morbid silence, with painful and fitful efforts
-to appear interested in each other. Walking to the theatre, they once took
-the wrong turning and had to ask the way. At the stage door they smiled
-painfully, nodded, glad to part. Hubert went up to Montague Ford's room. He
-found the comedian on a low stool, seated before a low table covered with
-brushes and cosmetics, in front of a triple glass.</p>
-
-<p>'My dear friend, do not trouble me now. I am thinking of my part.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert turned to go.</p>
-
-<p>'Stay a moment,' cried the actor. 'You know when the husband meets the
-wife he has divorced?'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert remembered the moment referred to, and, with anxious, doubting
-eyes, the comedian sought from the author justification for some
-intonations and gestures which seemed to him to form part and parcel of the
-nature of the man whose drunkenness he had so admirably depicted on his
-face.</p>
-
-<p>'"<i>This is most unfortunate, very unlucky&mdash;very, my dear Louisa;
-but&mdash;&mdash;</i>"</p>
-
-<p>'"<i>I am no longer obliged to bear with your insults; I can now defend
-myself against you.</i>"</p>
-
-<a name="058.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<div class="image"><a href="images/image03.jpeg"><img src="images/image03-thumb.jpeg"
-align="left" alt="[drawing]"></a>
-
-"In the third row Harding stood talking to a young man." </div>
-
-<br>
-
-<a name="059.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<a name="060.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Now, is that your idea of the scene?'</p>
-
-<p>A pained look came upon Hubert's face. 'Don't question me now, my dear
-fellow. I cannot fix my attention. I can see, however, that your make-up is
-capital&mdash;you are the man himself.'</p>
-
-<p>The actor was satisfied, and in his satisfaction he said, 'I think it
-will be all right, old chap.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert hoped to reach his box without meeting critics or authors. The
-serving-maids bowed and smiled,&mdash;he was the author of the play. 'They'll
-think still more of me if the notices are right,' he thought, as he hurried
-upstairs, and from behind the curtain of his box he peeped down and counted
-the critics who edged their way down the stalls. Harding stood in the third
-row talking to a young man. He said, 'You mean the woman with the black
-hair piled into a point, and fastened with a steel circlet. A face of
-sheep-like sensuality. Red lips and a round receding chin. A large bosom,
-and two thin arms showing beneath the opera cloak, which she has not yet
-thrown from her shoulders. I do not know her&mdash;<i>une laideur attirante</i>.
-Many a man might be interested in her. But do you see the woman in the
-stage-box? You would not believe it, but she is sixty, and has only just
-begun to speak of herself as an <a name="061.png" class="pb"></a> old
-woman. She kept her figure, and had an admirer when she was
-fifty-eight.'</p>
-
-<p>'What has become of him?'</p>
-
-<p>'They quarrelled; two years ago he told her he hoped never to see her
-ugly old face again. And that delicate little creature in the box next to
-her&mdash;that pale diaphanous face?'</p>
-
-<p>'With a young man hanging over her whispering in her ear?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes. She hates the theatre; it gives her neuralgia; but she attends all
-the first nights because her one passion is to be made love to in public.
-If her admirer did not hang over her in front of the box just as that man
-is doing, she would not tolerate him for a week.'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment the conversation was interrupted by a new-comer, who
-asked if he had seen the play when it was first produced.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes,' said Harding; 'I did.' And he continued his search for
-acquaintances amid white rows of female backs, necks, and half-seen
-profiles&mdash;amid the black cloth shoulders cut sharply upon the illumined
-curtain.</p>
-
-<p>'And what do you think of it? Do you think it will succeed this
-time?'</p>
-
-<p>'Ford will create an impression in the part; but I don't think the piece
-will run.'</p>
-
-<a name="062.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'And why? Because the public is too stupid?'</p>
-
-<p>'Partly, and partly because Price is only an intentionist. He cannot
-carry an idea quite through.'</p>
-
-<p>'Are you going to write about it?'</p>
-
-<p>'I may.'</p>
-
-<p>'And what will you say?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, most interesting things to be said. Let's take the case of Hubert
-Price ... Ah, there, the curtain is going up.'</p>
-
-<p>The curtain rolled slowly up, and in a small country drawing-room, in
-very simple but very pointedly written dialogue, the story of Mrs. Holmes'
-domestic misfortunes was gradually unfolded. It appeared that she had
-flirted with Captain Grey; he had written her some compromising letters,
-and she had once been to his rooms alone. So the Court had pronounced a
-decree <i>nisi</i>. But Mrs. Holmes had not been unfaithful to her husband.
-She had flirted with Captain Grey because her husband's attentions to a
-certain Mrs. Barrington had maddened her, and in her jealous rage had
-written foolish letters, and been to see Captain Grey.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert noticed that folk were still asking for their seats, and pushing
-down the very rows in which the most influential critics were sitting. They
-exchanged a salutation with their friends in the dress-circle, and, <a
-name="063.png" class="pb"></a> when they were seated, looked around, making
-observations regarding the appearance of the house; and all the while the
-actors were speaking. Hubert trembled with fear and rage. Would these
-people never give their attention to the stage? If they had been sitting by
-him, he could have struck them. Then a line turned into nonsense by the
-actress who played Mrs. Holmes was a lancinating pain; and the actor who
-played Captain Grey, played so slowly that Hubert could hardly refrain from
-calling from his box. He looked round the theatre, noticing the indifferent
-faces of the critics, and the women's shoulders seemed to him especially
-vacuous and imbecile.</p>
-
-<p>The principal scene of the second act was between Mrs. Holmes and the
-man who had divorced her. He has-been driven to drink by the vile behaviour
-of his second wife; he is ruined in health and in pocket, and has come to
-the woman he wronged to beg forgiveness; he knows she has learnt to love
-Captain Grey, but will not marry him, because she believes that once
-married always married. There is only one thing he can do to repair the
-wrong he has done&mdash;he will commit suicide, and so enable her to marry the
-man she loves. He tells her that he has bought the pistol to do it with,
-and the words, 'Not here! not here!' escape from <a name="064.png"
-class="pb"></a> her; and he answers, 'No, not here, but in a cab. I've got
-one at the door.' He goes out; Captain Grey enters, and Mrs. Holmes begs
-him to save her husband. While they are discussing how this is to be done,
-he re-enters, saying that his conscience smote him as he was going to pull
-the trigger. Will she forgive him? If she won't, he must make an end of
-himself. She says she will.</p>
-
-<p>In the third act Hubert had attempted to paint Mr. Holmes' vain efforts
-to reform his life. But the constant presence of Captain Grey in the
-household, his attempts to win Mrs. Holmes from her husband, and the
-drunken husband's amours with the servant-maid disgusted rather than
-horrified. In the fourth act the wretched husband admits that his
-reformation is impossible, and that, although he has no courage to commit
-suicide and set his wife free, he will return to his evil courses; they
-will sooner or later make an end of him. The slowness and deadly gravity
-with which Ford took this scene rendered it intolerable; and,
-notwithstanding the beauty of the conclusion, when the deserted wife, in
-the silence of her drawing-room, reads again Captain Grey's letter, telling
-her that he has left England for ever, and with another, the success of the
-play was left in doubt, and the audience <a name="065.png" class="pb"></a>
-filed out, talking, chattering, arguing, wondering what the public verdict
-would be.</p>
-
-<p>To avoid commiseration of heartless friends and the triumphant glances
-of literary enemies, Hubert passed through the door leading on to the
-stage. Scene-shifters were brutally pushing away what remained of his play;
-and the presence of Hamilton Brown, the dramatic author, talking to Ford,
-was at that moment particularly disagreeable. On catching sight of Hubert,
-Brown ran to him, shook him by the hand, and murmured some discreet
-congratulations. He preferred the piece, however, as it had been originally
-written, and suggested to Ford the advisability of returning to the first
-text. Then Ford went upstairs to take his paint off, and Hubert walked
-about the stage with Brown. Brown's insincerity was sufficiently
-transparent; but men in Hubert's position catch at straws, and he soon
-began to believe that the attitude of the public towards his play was not
-so unfavourable as he had imagined.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert tried to summon up a smile for the stage-door keeper, who, he
-feared, had heard that the piece had failed, and then the moment they got
-outside he begged Rose to tell him the exact truth. She assured him that
-Ford had said that he had always counted on a certain amount of opposition;
-but that he believed <a name="066.png" class="pb"></a> that the general
-public, being more free of prejudice and less sophisticated, would be
-impressed by the simple humanity of the play. The conversation paused, and
-at the end of an irritating silence he said, 'You were excellent, as good
-as any one could be in a part that did not suit them. Ah, if he had cast
-you for the adventuress, how you would have played it!...'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm so glad you are pleased. I hope my notices will be good. Do you
-think they will?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, your notices will be all right,' he answered, with a sigh.</p>
-
-<p>'And your notices will be all right too. No one can say what is going to
-succeed. There was a call after each of the last three acts.... I don't see
-how a piece could go better. It is the suspense....'</p>
-
-<p>'Ah, yes, the suspense!'</p>
-
-<p>They lingered on the landing, and Hubert said, 'Won't you come in for a
-moment?' She followed him into the room. His calm face, usually a perfect
-picture of repose and self-possession, betrayed his emotion by a certain
-blankness in the eyes, certain contractions in the skin of the forehead.
-'I'm afraid,' he said, 'there's no hope.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, you mustn't say that!' she replied. 'I think it <a name="067.png"
-class="pb"></a> went very well indeed.... I know I did nothing with the
-young girl. I oughtn't to have undertaken the part.'</p>
-
-<p>'You were excellent. If we only get some good notices. If we don't, I
-shall never get another play of mine acted.' He looked at her imploringly,
-thirsting for a woman's sympathy. But the little girl was thinking of
-certain effects which she would have made, and which the actress who had
-played the adventuress had failed to make.</p>
-
-<p>'I watched her all the time,' she said, 'following every line, saying
-all the time, "Oh yes, that's all very nice and very proper, my young
-woman; but it's not it; no, not at all&mdash;not within a hundred miles of it."
-I don't think she ever really touched the part&mdash;do you?' Hubert did not
-answer, and a quiver of distraction ran through the muscles of her
-face.</p>
-
-<p>'Why don't you answer me?'</p>
-
-<p>'I can't answer you,' he said abruptly. Then remembering, he added,
-'Forgive me; I can think of nothing now.' He hid his face in his hands, and
-sobbed twice&mdash;two heavy, choking sobs, pregnant with the weight of anguish
-lying on his heart.</p>
-
-<p>Seeing how much he suffered, she laid her hand on his shoulder. 'I am
-very sorry; I wish I could help <a name="068.png" class="pb"></a> you. I
-know how it tears the heart when one cannot get out what one has in one's
-brain.'</p>
-
-<p>Her artistic appreciation of his suffering only jarred him the more.
-What he longed for was some kind, simple-hearted woman who would say,
-'Never mind, dear; the play was perfectly right, only they did not
-understand it; I love you better than ever.' But Rose could not give him
-the sympathy he wanted; and to be alone was almost a relief. He dared not
-go to bed; he sat looking into space. The roar of London hushed till it was
-no more than a faint murmur, the hissing of the gas grew louder, and still
-Hubert sat thinking, the same thoughts battling in his brain. He looked
-into the future, but could see nothing but suicide. His uncle? He had
-applied to him before for help; there was no hope there. Then he tramped up
-and down, maddened by the infernal hissing of the gas; and then threw
-himself into his arm-chair. And so a terrible night wore away; and it was
-not until long after the early carts had begun to rattle in the streets
-that exhaustion brought an end to his sufferings, and he rolled into
-bed.</p>
-
-<a name="069.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>VI</h2>
-
-<p>'<span class="small-caps">What</span> will ye 'ave to eat? Eggs and
-bacon?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no!'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, then, 'ave a chop?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no!'</p>
-
-<p>'Ye must 'ave something.'</p>
-
-<p>'A cup of tea, a slice of toast. I'm not hungry.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, ye are worse than a young lady for a happetite. Miss Massey 'as
-sent you down these 'ere papers.'</p>
-
-<p>The servant-girl laid the papers on the bed, and Hubert lay back on his
-pillow, so that he might collect his thoughts. Stretching forth his hands,
-he selected the inevitable paper.</p>
-
-<p>'For those who do not believe that our English home life is composed
-mainly, if not entirely, of lying, drunkenness, and conjugal infidelity,
-and its sequel divorce, yester evening at the Queen's Theatre must have
-been a sad and dismal experience. That men and women who have vowed to love
-each other do sometimes prove false to their troth no reasonable <a
-name="070.png" class="pb"></a> man will deny. With the divorce court before
-our eyes, even the most enthusiastic believer in the natural goodness and
-ultimate perfectibility of human nature must admit that men and women are
-frail. But drunkenness and infidelity are happily not characteristic of our
-English homes. Then why, we ask, should a dramatist select such a theme,
-and by every artifice of dialogue force into prominence all that is mean
-and painful in an unfortunate woman's life? Always the same relentless
-method; the cold, passionless curiosity of the vivisector; the scalpel is
-placed under the nerve, and we are called upon to watch the quivering
-flesh. Never the kind word, the tears, the effusion, which is man's highest
-prerogative, and which separates him from the brute and signifies the
-immortal end for which he was created. We hold that it is a pity to see so
-much talent wasted, and it was indeed a melancholy sight to see so many
-capable actors and actresses labouring to&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'This is even worse than usual,' said Hubert; and glancing through half
-a column of hysterical commonplace, he came upon the following:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'But if this woman had succeeded in reclaiming from vice the man who
-unjustly divorced her, and who in his misery goes back to ask her
-forgiveness for pity's <a name="071.png" class="pb"></a> sake, what a
-lesson we should have had! And, with lightened and not with heavier hearts,
-we should have left the theatre comforted, better and happier men and
-women. But turning his back on the goodness, truth, and love whither he had
-induced us to believe he was leading us, the author flagrantly makes the
-woman contradict her whole nature in the last act; and, because her husband
-falls again, she, instead of raising him with all the tender mercies and
-humanities of wifehood, declares that her life has been one long mistake,
-and that she accepts the divorce which the Court had unjustly granted. The
-moral, if such a word may be applied to such a piece is this: "The law may
-be bad, but human nature is worse."'</p>
-
-<p>The other morning papers took the same view,&mdash;a great deal of talent
-wasted on a subject that could please no one. Hubert threw the papers
-aside, lay back, and in the lucid idleness of the bed his thoughts grew
-darker. It was hardly possible that the piece could survive such notices;
-and if it did not? Well, he would have to go. But until the piece was taken
-out of the bills it would be a weakness to harbour the ugly thought.</p>
-
-<p>There were, however, the evening papers to look forward to, and soon
-after midday Annie was sent to buy all that had appeared. Hubert expected
-to find in <a name="072.png" class="pb"></a> these papers a more delicate
-appreciation of his work. Many of the critics of the evening press were his
-personal friends, and nearly all were young men in full sympathy with the
-new school of dramatic thought. He read paper after paper with avidity; and
-Annie was sent in a cab to buy one that had not yet found its way so far
-north as Fitzroy Street. The opinion of this paper was of all importance,
-and Hubert tore it open with trembling fingers. Although more temperately
-written than the others, it was clearly favourable, and Hubert sighed a
-sweet sigh of relief. A weight was lifted from him; the world suddenly
-seemed to grow brighter; and he went to the theatre that evening, and, half
-doubting and half confidently, presented himself at the door of Montague
-Ford's dressing-room. The actor had not yet begun to dress, and was busy
-writing letters. He stretched his hand hurriedly to Hubert.</p>
-
-<p>'Excuse me, my dear fellow; I have a couple of letters to finish.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert sat down, glancing nervously from the actor to the morning papers
-with which the table was strewn. There was not an evening paper there. Had
-he not seen them? At the end of about ten minutes the actor said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<a name="073.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Well, this is a bad business; they are terribly down on us&mdash;aren't
-they? What do you think?'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you seen the evening papers&mdash;<i>The Telephone</i>, for
-instance?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, I've seen them all; but the evening papers don't amount to
-much. Stiggins's article was terrible. I am afraid he has killed the
-piece.'</p>
-
-<p>'Don't you think it will run, then?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, that depends upon the public, of course. If they like it, I'll
-keep it on.'</p>
-
-<p>'How's the booking?'</p>
-
-<p>'Not good.' Montague Ford moved his papers absent-mindedly. At the end
-of a long silence he said, 'Even if the piece did catch on, it would take a
-lot of working up to undo the mischief of those articles. Of course you can
-rely on me to give it every chance. I shan't take it out of the bills if I
-can possibly help.'</p>
-
-<p>'There is my <i>Gipsy</i>.'</p>
-
-<p>'I have another piece ready to put into rehearsal; it was arranged for
-six months ago. I only consented to produce your play because&mdash;well,
-because there has been such an outcry lately about art.... Tremendous part
-for me in the new piece... I'm sure you'll like it.'</p>
-
-<p>The business did improve, but so very slowly that <a name="074.png"
-class="pb"></a> Hubert was afraid Ford would lose patience and take the
-play out of the bills. But while the fate of the play hung in the balance,
-Hubert's life was being rendered unbearable by duns. They had found him
-out, one and all; to escape being served was an impossibility; and now his
-table was covered with summonses to appear at the County Court. This would
-not matter if the piece once took the public taste. Then he would be able
-to pay every one, and have some time to rest and think. And there seemed
-every prospect of its catching on. Discussions regarding the morality of
-the play had arisen in the newspapers, and the eternal question whether men
-and women are happier married or unmarried had reached its height. Hubert
-spent the afternoon addressing letters to the papers, striving to fan the
-flame of controversy. Every evening he listened for Rose's footstep on the
-stairs.&mdash;How did the piece go?&mdash;Was there a better house? Money or
-paper?&mdash;Have you seen the notice in the &mdash;&mdash;?&mdash;First-rate, wasn't it?&mdash;That
-ought to do some good.&mdash;I've heard there was a notice in the &mdash;&mdash;, but I
-haven't seen it. Have you?&mdash;No; but So-and-so saw the paper, and said there
-was nothing in it. And, do you know, I hear there's going to be a notice in
-<i>The Modern Review</i>, and that So-and-so is writing it.</p>
-
-<a name="075.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Every post brought newspapers; the room was filled with newspapers&mdash;all
-kinds of newspapers&mdash;papers one has never heard of,&mdash;French papers, Welsh
-papers, North of England papers, Scotch and Irish papers. Hubert read
-columns about himself, anecdotes of all kinds,&mdash;where he was born, who were
-his parents, and what first induced him to attempt writing for the stage;
-his personal appearance, mode of life, the cut of his clothes; his
-religious, moral, and political views. Had he been the plaintiff in an
-action for criminal libel, greater industry in the collection and the
-fabrication of personal details could hardly have been displayed.</p>
-
-<p>But at these articles Hubert only glanced; he was interested in his
-piece, not in himself, and when Annie brought up <i>The Modern Review</i>
-he tore it open, knowing he would find there criticism more fundamental,
-more searching. But as he read, the expression of hope which his face wore
-changed to one of pain pitiful to look upon. The article began with a
-sketch of the general situation, and in a tone of commiseration, of
-benevolent malice, the writer pointed out how inevitable it was that the
-critics should have taken Mr. Price, when <i>Divorce</i> was first
-produced, for the new dramatic genius they were waiting for. 'There comes a
-moment,' said this caustic writer, 'in the affairs of <a name="076.png"
-class="pb"></a> men when the new is not only eagerly accepted, but when it
-is confounded with the original. Wearied by the old stereotyped form of
-drama, the critics had been astonished by a novelty of subject, more
-apparent than real, and by certain surface qualities in the execution; they
-had hailed the work as being original both in form and in matter, whereas
-all that was good in the play had been borrowed from France and
-Scandinavia. <i>Divorce</i> was the inevitable product of the time. It had
-been written by Mr. Price, but it might have been written by a dozen other
-young men&mdash;granting intelligence, youth, leisure, a university education,
-and three or four years of London life&mdash;any one of a dozen clever young men
-who frequent West End drawing-rooms and dabble in literature might have
-written it. All that could be said was that the play was, or rather had
-been, <i>dans le mouvement</i>; and original work never is <i>dans le
-mouvement</i>. <i>Divorce</i> was nothing more than the product of certain
-surroundings, and remembering Mr. Price's other plays, there seemed to be
-no reason to believe that he would do better. Mr. Price had tried his hand
-at criticism, and that was a sure sign that the creative faculty had begun
-to wither. His critical essays were not rich nor abundant in thought, they
-were not the skirmishing of a man fighting for his <a name="077.png"
-class="pb"></a> ideas, they were not preliminary to a great battle; they
-were at once vague and pedantic, somewhat futile, <i>les &eacute;bats d'un esprit
-en peine</i>, and seemed to announce a talent in progress of disintegration
-rather than of reconstruction.</p>
-
-<p>'Sometimes the critic's phrases seemed wet with tears; sometimes,
-abandoning his tone of commiseration, he would assume one of scientific
-indifference. The phenomenon was the commonest. There were dozens of Hubert
-Prices in London. The universities and the newspapers, working singly and
-in collaboration, turned them out by the dozen. And the mission of these
-men of intelligent culture seemed to be to <i>poser des lapins sur la jeune
-presse</i>. Each one came in turn with his little volume of poems, his
-little play, his little picture; all were men of "advanced ideas"; in other
-words, they were all <i>dans le mouvement</i>. There was the rough Hubert
-Price, who made mild consternation in the drawing-room, and there was the
-sophisticated Hubert Price, who cajoled the drawing-room; there was the
-sincere and the insincere, and the Price that suffered and the Price that
-didn't. Each one brought a different <i>nuance</i>, a thousand
-infinitesimal variations of the type, but, considered merely in its
-relation to art, the species may be said to be divided <a name="078.png"
-class="pb"></a> into two distinct categories. In the first category are
-those who rise almost at the first bound to a certain level, who produce
-quickly, never reaching again the original standard, dropping a little
-lower at each successive effort until their work becomes indistinguishable
-from the ordinary artistic commercialism of the time. The fate of those in
-the second category is more pathetic; they gradually wither and die away
-like flowers planted in a thin soil. Among these men many noble souls are
-to be found, men who have surrendered all things for love of their art, and
-who seemed at starting to be the best equipped to win, but who failed,
-impossible to tell how or why. Sometimes their failure turns to comedy,
-sometimes to tragedy. They may become refined, delicate, elderly bachelors,
-the ornaments of drawing-rooms, professional diners-out&mdash;men with brilliant
-careers behind them. But if fate has not willed that they should retire
-into brilliant shells; if chance does not allow them to retreat, to
-separate themselves from their kind, but arbitrarily joins them to others,
-linking their fate to the fate of others' unhappiness, disaster may and
-must accrue from the alliance; honesty of purpose, trueness of heart, deep
-love, every great, good, and gracious quality to be found in nature, will
-not suffice to save them.'</p>
-
-<a name="079.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>The paper dropped from his hands, and he recollected all his
-failures.</p>
-
-<p>'Once I could do good work; now I can do neither good work nor bad. Were
-I a rich man, I should collect my scattered papers and write songs to be
-sung in drawing-rooms; but being a poor one, I must&mdash;I suppose I must get
-out. Positively, there is no hope,&mdash;debts on every side. Fate has willed me
-to go as went Haydon, Gerard de Nerval, and Mar&eacute;chal. The first cut his
-throat, the second hanged himself, and the third blew out his brains.
-Clearly the time has come to consider how I shall make my exit. It is a
-little startling to be called upon so peremptorily to go.'</p>
-
-<p>In this moment of extreme dejection it seemed to Hubert that the writer
-of the article had told him the exact truth. He refused to admit the plea
-of poverty. It was of course hard to write when one is being harassed by
-creditors. But if he had had it in him, it would have come out. The critic
-had very probably told him the truth. He could not hope to make a living
-out of literature. He had not the strength to write the masterpiece which
-the perverse cruelty of nature had permitted him only to see, and he was
-hopelessly unfit for journalism. But in his simple, wholesome mind there
-was no bent towards suicide; and he <a name="080.png" class="pb"></a>
-scanned every horizon. Once again he thought of his uncle. Five years ago
-he had written, asking him for the loan of a hundred pounds. He had
-received ten. And how vain it would be to write a second time! A few pounds
-would only serve to prolong his misery. No; he would not drift from
-degradation to degradation.</p>
-
-<p>He only glanced at the letter which Annie had brought up with the copy
-of <i>The Modern Review</i>. It was clearly a lawyer's letter. Should he
-open it? Why not spare himself the pain? He could alter nothing; and in
-these last days&mdash;&mdash; Leaving the thought unfinished, he sought for his keys;
-he went to his box, unlocked it, and took out a small paper package. Of the
-fifty pounds he had received from Ford about twenty remained: he had been
-poorer before, but hardly quite so hopeless. He scanned every horizon&mdash;all
-were barred. The thought of suicide, and with it the instinctive shrinking
-from it, came into his mind again. Suppose he took, that very night, an
-overdose of chloral? He tried to put the thought from him, and returned, a
-little dazed and helpless, to his chair. Had the critic in <i>The Modern
-Review</i> told him the truth? Was he incapable of earning a living? It
-seemed so. Above all, was he incapable of finishing <a name="081.png"
-class="pb"></a> <i>The Gipsy</i> as he intended? No; that he felt was a
-lie. Give him six months' quiet, free from worry and all anxiety, and he
-would do it. Many a year had passed since he had enjoyed a month of quiet;
-and glancing again at the letter on the table, he thought that perhaps at
-that very moment a score of gallery boys were hissing his play. Perhaps at
-that very moment Ford was making up his mind to announce the last six
-nights of <i>Divorce</i>. At a quarter to twelve he heard Rose's foot on
-the stairs. He opened the door.</p>
-
-<p>'How did the piece go to-night?'</p>
-
-<p>'Pretty well.'</p>
-
-<p>'Only pretty well? Won't you come in for a few minutes?... So the piece
-didn't go very well to-night?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, it did. I've seen it go better; but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Did you get a call?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, after the second act.'</p>
-
-<p>'Not after the third?'</p>
-
-<p>'No. That act never goes well. Harding came behind; I was speaking to
-him, and he said something which struck me as being very true. Ford, he
-said, plays the part a great deal too seriously. When the piece was first
-produced, it was played more good-humouredly <a name="082.png"
-class="pb"></a> by indifferent actors, who let the thing run without trying
-to bring out every point. Ford makes it as hard as nails. I think those
-were his exact words.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert did not answer. At the end of a long silence he said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Did you hear anything about the last night's?'</p>
-
-<p>'No,' she said; 'I heard nothing of that.'</p>
-
-<p>'Ford appeared quite satisfied then?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, quite,' she answered, with difficulty; for his eyes were fixed on
-her, and she felt he knew she was not telling the truth. The conversation
-paused again, and to turn it into another channel she said, 'Why, you have
-not opened your letter!'</p>
-
-<p>'I can see it is a lawyer's letter, on account of some unpaid bill. If I
-could pay it, I would; but as I can't&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'You are afraid to open it,' said Rose.</p>
-
-<p>Ashamed of his weakness, Hubert opened the letter, and began to read.
-Rose saw that the letter was not such an one as he had expected, and a
-moment after his face told her that fortunate news had come to him. The
-signs of the tumult within were represented by the passing of the hand
-across the brow, as if to brush aside some strange hallucination, and <a
-name="083.png" class="pb"></a> the sudden coming of a vague look of
-surprise and fear into the eyes. He said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Read it! Read it!'</p>
-
-<p>Relieved of much detail and much cumbersome legal circumlocution, it was
-to the following effect:&mdash;That about three months ago Mr. Burnett had come
-up from his place in Sussex, and at the offices of Messrs. Grandly &amp;
-Co. had made a will, in which he had disinherited his adopted daughter,
-Miss Emily Watson, and left everything to Mr. Hubert Price. There was no
-question as to the validity of the will; but Messrs. Grandly deemed it
-their duty to inform Mr. Hubert Price of the circumstances under which it
-had been made, and also of the fact that a few weeks before his death Mr.
-Burnett had told Mr. John Grandly, who was then staying with Mr. Burnett at
-Ashwood, that he intended adding a codicil, leaving some two or three
-hundred a year to Miss Watson. It was unfortunate that Mr. Burnett had not
-had time to do this; for Miss Watson was an orphan, eighteen years of age,
-and entirely unprovided for. Messrs. Grandly begged to submit these facts
-to the consideration of Mr. Hubert Price. Miss Watson was now residing at
-Ashwood. She was there with a friend of hers, Mrs. Bentley; and should Mr.
-Hubert Price <a name="084.png" class="pb"></a> feel inclined to do what Mr.
-Burnett had left undone, Messrs. Grandly would have very great pleasure in
-carrying his wishes into effect.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm not dreaming, am I?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, you are not. It is quite true. Your uncle has left his money to
-you. I am so glad; indeed I am. You will be able to finish your play, and
-take a theatre and produce it yourself if you like. I hope you won't forget
-me. I do want to play that part. You can't quite know what I shall do with
-it. One can't explain oneself in a scene here and there.... What are you
-thinking of?'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm thinking of that poor girl, Emily Watson. It comes very hard upon
-her.'</p>
-
-<p>'Who is she?'</p>
-
-<p>'The girl my uncle disinherited.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, she! Well, you can marry her if you like. That would not be a bad
-notion. But if you do, you'll forget all about me and Lady Hayward.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I shall never forget you, Rose.' He stretched his hand to her; but,
-irrespective of his will, the gesture seemed full of farewell.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm so much obliged to you,' he said; 'had it not been for you, I might
-never have opened that letter.'</p>
-
-<p>'Even if you hadn't, it wouldn't have mattered; you <a name="085.png"
-class="pb"></a> would have heard of your good fortune some other way. But
-it is getting very late. I must say good-night. I hope you will have a
-pleasant time in the country, and will finish your play. Good-night.'</p>
-
-<p>Returning from the door, he stopped to think. 'We have been very good
-friends&mdash;that is all. How strangely determined she is!... More so than I
-am. She is bound to succeed. There is in her just that note of individual
-passion.... Perhaps some one will find her out before I have
-finished,&mdash;that would be a pity. I wonder which of us will succeed
-first?'</p>
-
-<p>Then the madness of good fortune came upon him suddenly; he could think
-no more of Rose, and had to go for a long walk in the streets.</p>
-
-<a name="086.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>VII</h2>
-
-<p>'<span class="small-caps">Dearest</span> Emily, you must prepare
-yourself for the worst.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is he dead?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; he passed away quite quietly. To look at him one would say he was
-asleep; he does not appear to have suffered at all.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, Julia, Julia, do you think he forgave me? I could not do what he
-asked me.... I loved him very dearly as a father, but I could not have
-married him.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, dear, you could not. Such a marriage would have been most
-unnatural; he was more than forty years older than you.'</p>
-
-<p>'I do not think he ever thought of such a thing until about a month or
-six weeks ago. You remember how I ran to you? I was as white as a ghost,
-and I trembled like a leaf. I could hardly speak.... You remember?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, I remember; and some hours after, when I came into this room, he
-was standing there, just there, on the hearth-rug; there was a fearful look
-of pain and <a name="087.png" class="pb"></a> despair on his face&mdash;he
-looked as if he was going mad. I never saw such a look before, and I never
-wish to see such a look again. And the effort he made to appear unconcerned
-when he saw me was perhaps the worst part of it. I pretended to see
-nothing, and walked away towards the window and looked out. But all the
-while I could feel that some terrible drama was passing behind me. At last
-I had to look round. He was sitting in that chair, his elbows on his knees,
-clasping his head with both hands, the old, gnarled fingers twined in the
-iron-grey hair. Then, unable to contain himself any longer, he rushed out
-of the room, out of the house, and across the park.'</p>
-
-<p>'You say that he passed away quietly; he did not seem to suffer at
-all?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, he never recovered consciousness.'</p>
-
-<p>'But do you think that my refusal to marry him had anything to do with
-his death?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh no, Emily; a fit of apoplexy, with a man of his age, generally ends
-fatally.'</p>
-
-<p>'Even if I had known it all beforehand I don't think I could have acted
-differently. I could not have married him. Indeed I couldn't, Julia, not
-even if I knew I should save his life by doing so. I daresay it is very
-wicked of me, but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<a name="088.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Dearest Emily, you must not give way to such thoughts; you did quite
-right in refusing to marry Mr. Burnett. It was very wrong of him even to
-think of asking you, and if he had lived he would have seen how wrong it
-was of him to desire such a thing.'</p>
-
-<p>'If he had lived! But then he didn't live, not even long enough to
-forgive me, and when we think of how much he suffered&mdash;I don't mean in
-dying, you say he passed away quietly, but all this last month how
-heart-broken he looked! You remember when he sat at the head of the table,
-never speaking to us, and how frightened I was lest I should meet him on
-the stairs; I used to stand at the door of my room, afraid to move. I know
-he suffered, poor old man. I was very, very sorry for him. Indeed I was,
-Julia, for I'm not selfish, and when I think now that he died without
-forgiving me, I feel, I feel&mdash;oh, I feel as if I should like to die myself.
-Why do such things happen to me? I feel just as miserable now as I used to
-when I lived with father and mother, who could not agree. I have often told
-you how miserable I was then, but I don't think you ever quite understood.
-I feel just the same now, just as if I never wanted to see any one or
-anything again. I was so unhappy when I was a child, they thought I would
-die, and I should have died if I had <a name="089.png" class="pb"></a>
-remained listening to father and mother any longer. ... Every one thought I
-was so lucky when Mr. Burnett decided to adopt me and leave me all his
-money, and he has done that, poor old man, so I suppose I should be happy;
-but I'm not.'</p>
-
-<p>The girl's eyes turned instinctively towards the window and rested for a
-moment on the fair, green prospects of the park.</p>
-
-<p>'I hated to listen to father and mother quarrelling, but I loved them,
-and I had not been here a year before father died, and darling mother was
-not long following him&mdash;only six months. Then I had no one: a few distant
-relatives, whom I knew nothing of, whom I did not care for, so I gave all
-my love to Mr. Burnett. He was so good to me; he never denied me anything;
-he gave me everything, even you, dearest Julia. When he thought I wanted a
-companion, he found you for me. I learnt to love you. You became my best
-and dearest friend. Then things seemed to brighten up, and I thought I was
-happy, when all this dreadful trouble came upon us. Don't let's speak of it
-more than we can help. I often wished myself dead. Didn't you, Julia?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily Watson told the story of her misfortunes in a low, musical voice,
-heedless of two or three interruptions, <a name="090.png" class="pb"></a>
-hardly conscious of her listener, impressed and interested by the fatality
-of circumstances which she believed in design against her. She was a small,
-slender girl of about eighteen. Her abundant chestnut hair&mdash;exquisite,
-soft, and silky&mdash;was looped picturesquely, and fastened with a thin
-tortoiseshell comb. The tiny mouth trembled, and the large, prominent eyes
-reflected a strange, yearning soul. She was dressed in white muslin, and
-the fantastically small waist was confined with a white band. Her friend
-and companion, Julia Bentley, was a woman of about thirty, well above the
-medium height, full-bosomed and small-waisted. The type was Anglo-Saxon
-even to commonplace. The face was long, with a look of instinctive kindness
-upon it. She was given to staring, and as she looked at Emily, her blue
-eyes filled with an expression which told of a nature at once affectionate
-and intelligent. She was dressed in yellow linen, and wore a gold bracelet
-on a well-turned arm.</p>
-
-<p>The room was a long, old-fashioned drawing-room. It had three windows,
-and all three were filled with views of the park, now growing pale in the
-evening air. The flower-gardens were drawn symmetrically about the house
-and were set with blue flower-vases in which there were red geraniums. It
-was a very <a name="091.png" class="pb"></a> large room, nearly forty feet
-long, with old portraits on the walls&mdash;ugly things and ill done; and where
-there were no portraits the walls were decorated with vine leaves and
-mountains. The parqueted floor was partially covered with skins, and the
-furniture seemed to have known many a generation; some of it was heavy and
-cumbersome, some of it was modern. There was a grand piano, and above it
-two full-length portraits&mdash;a lady in a blue dress and a man in black velvet
-knee-breeches. At the end of a long silence, Emily suddenly threw herself
-weeping into Julia's arms.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, you are my only friend; you will not leave me now.... We shall
-always love one another, shall we not? If anything ever came between us it
-would kill me.... That poor old man lying dead up-stairs! He loved me very
-dearly, and I loved him, too. Yet I said just now I could not have married
-him even if I had known it would save his life. I was wrong; yes, I would
-have married him if I had known.... You don't believe me?'</p>
-
-<p>'My dearest girl, you must try to forget that Mr. Burnett ever
-entertained so foolish a thought. He was a very good man, and loved you for
-a long time as he should have loved you&mdash;as a daughter. We shall <a
-name="092.png" class="pb"></a> respect his memory best by forgetting the
-events of the last six weeks. And now, Emily, dinner will be ready at seven
-o'clock, and it is now six. What are you going to do?'</p>
-
-<p>'I shall go out for a little walk. I shall go down and see the
-swans.'</p>
-
-<p>'Shall I come with you?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, thank you, dear; I think I'd sooner be alone. I want to think.'</p>
-
-<p>Julia looked a moment anxiously at this fragile girl, whose tiny head
-was poised on a long, delicate neck like a fruit on its stem.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, go for a walk, dear,' said Julia; 'it will do you good. Shall I go
-and fetch your hat and jacket?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, thank you, I will not trouble you; I'll go myself.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, Emily, I think you had better let me go.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, no; I am not afraid.'</p>
-
-<p>And she went up the wide oak staircase, thinking of the man who lay dead
-in the room at the end of the passage. She was conscious of a sense of
-dread; the house seemed to wear a strange air, and her dog, Dandy, was
-conscious of it, too; he was more silent, less joyful than usual. And when
-she came from her room, dressed to go out, instead of rushing down-stairs,
-<a name="093.png" class="pb"></a> barking with joy, he dropped his tail and
-lingered at the end of the passage. She called him; he still hesitated, and
-then, yielding to a sudden desire, she went down the passage and knocked at
-the door of the room. The nurse answered her knock.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, don't come in, miss.'</p>
-
-<p>'Why not? I want to see him before he goes away for ever.'</p>
-
-<p>Upon the limp, white curtains of an old four-posted bed she saw the
-memorable profile&mdash;stern, unrelenting. How still he lay! Never would that
-face speak or laugh or see again. Although sixty-five, his head was covered
-with short, thick, iron-grey hair; the beard, too, was short and thick, and
-iron-grey. The face was rugged, and when Emily touched the coarse hand,
-telling of a life of toil, she started&mdash;it was singularly cold. Fear and
-sorrow in like measure choked her, and her soul awoke, and tremblingly she
-walked out of the house, glad to breathe the sweet evening air.</p>
-
-<p>She walked towards the artificial water. The sky was melancholy and
-grey, and the park lay before her, hushed and soundless. Through the
-shadows of the darkening island two swans floated softly, leaving behind
-slight silver lines; above, the swallows flew high in the evening. There
-was sensation of death, <a name="094.png" class="pb"></a> too, in this
-cold, mournful water, and in the silence that hung about it, and in some
-vague way it reminded Emily of her own life. She had known little else but
-death; her life seemed full of death; and those reflections, so distinct
-and so colourless, were like death.</p>
-
-<p>Then, in a sudden expansion of youth she wondered. Her own life, how
-strange, how personal, how intense! What did it mean, what meaning had it
-in the great, wide world? And the impressive tranquillity, the pale death
-of the day, lying like a flower on the water, seemed to symbolise her
-thought, and she felt more distinctly than she had ever done before. And
-there arose in her a nervous and passionate interest in herself. She seemed
-so strange, so wonderful. Her childhood was in itself an enigma. That sad
-and sorrowful childhood of hers, passed in that old London house; her
-mother's love for her; her cruel, stern stepfather, and the endless
-quarrels between her father and mother, which made her young life so
-unbearable, so wretched, that she could never think of those years without
-tears rising to her eyes. And then the going away, coming to live with Mr.
-Burnett! The death of her father and her dear mother, so sudden, following
-so soon one after the other. How much there had been <a name="095.png"
-class="pb"></a> in her life, how wonderful it was! Her love of Mr. Burnett,
-and then that bitter and passionate change in him! That proposal of
-marriage; could she ever forget it? And then this cruel and sudden death.
-Everything she had ever loved had been taken from her. Only Julia remained,
-and should Julia be taken from her, she felt that she must die. But that
-would not, could not, happen. She was now mistress of Ashwood, she was a
-great heiress; and she and Julia would live always together, they would
-always love one another, they would always live here in this beautiful
-place which they loved so well.</p>
-
-<a name="096.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>VIII</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">There</span> were at the funeral a few personal
-friends who lived in the neighbourhood, the farmers on the estate, and the
-labourers; and when the little crowd separated outside the church, Emily
-and Julia walked back to Ashwood with Mr. Grandly, Mr. Burnett's intimate
-friend and solicitor. They returned through the park, hardly speaking at
-all, Emily absent-minded as usual, waving her parasol occasionally at a
-passing butterfly. The grass was warm and beautiful to look on, and they
-lingered, prolonging the walk. It was very good of Mr. Grandly to accompany
-them back; he might have gone on straight to the station, so Julia thought,
-and she was surprised indeed when, instead of bidding them good-bye at the
-front door, he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Before I return to London I have a communication to make to both you
-ladies. Will it suit you to come into the drawing-room with me?'</p>
-
-<p>'Perfectly, so far as I'm concerned; and you, Emily?'</p>
-
-<a name="097.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Oh, I've nothing to do; but if it is about business, Julia will
-attend&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I think you had better be present, Miss Watson.'</p>
-
-<p>Mr. Grandly was a tall, massive man with benevolent features; his bald,
-pink skull was partly covered with one lock of white hair. There was an
-anxious look in his pale, deep-set eyes which impressed Julia, and she
-said: 'I hope this communication you have to make to us is not of a painful
-nature. We have&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, Mrs. Bentley, I know that you have been severely tried lately, but
-there is no help for it. I cannot keep you in ignorance any longer of
-certain facts relating to Mr. Burnett's will.' The words 'will' and 'facts'
-struck on Emily's ear. She had been thinking about her fortune. The very
-ground she was walking on was hers. She was the owner of this beautiful
-park; it seemed like a fairy tale. And that house, that dear, old-fashioned
-house, that rambling, funny old place of all sizes and shapes, full of deep
-staircases and pictures, was hers. Her eyes wandered along the smooth wide
-drive, down to the placid water crossed by the great ornamental bridge, the
-island where she had watched the swans floating last night&mdash;all these
-things were hers. So the words 'will' and 'facts' and 'ignorance of them'
-jarred her clutching <a name="098.png" class="pb"></a> little dream, and
-she turned her eyes&mdash;they wore an anxious look&mdash;towards Mr. Grandly, and
-said with an authoritative air: 'Yes, let us go into the drawing-room; I
-want to hear what Mr. Grandly has to say about&mdash;&mdash;Let us go into the
-drawing-room at once.'</p>
-
-<p>Julia took the chair nearest to her. Emily stood at the window, waiting
-impatiently for Mr. Grandly to begin. He laid his hat on the parquet, wiped
-his forehead with his handkerchief, and drew an arm-chair forward. 'Mr.
-Burnett, as you know, made a will some years ago, in favour of his cousin
-and adopted daughter, Miss Emily Watson. In that will he left his entire
-fortune to her, Ashwood Park and all his invested money. No other person
-was mentioned in that will, except Miss Watson. It was I who drew up this
-will. I remember discussing its provisions with Mr. Burnett, and advising
-him to leave something, even if it were only a few hundred pounds, to his
-nephew, Hubert Price. But Mr. Burnett was always a very headstrong man; he
-had quarrelled with this young man, as he said, irreparably, and could not
-be induced to leave him even a hundred pounds. I thought this was harsh,
-and as Mr. Burnett's friend I told him so&mdash;I have always been opposed to
-extreme measures,&mdash;but he was not to be gainsaid. So the matter remained
-for many <a name="099.png" class="pb"></a> years; never did Mr. Burnett
-mention his nephew's name. I thought he had forgotten the young man's
-existence, when, suddenly, without warning, Mr. Burnett came into my office
-and told me that he intended to alter his will, leaving all his property to
-his nephew, Hubert Price. You know what old friends we were, and, presuming
-on our friendship, I told him what I thought of his project of
-disinheritance, for it amounted to that. Well, suffice it to say, we very
-nearly quarrelled over the matter. I refused to draw up the will, so
-iniquitous did it seem to me. He said: "Very well, Grandly, I'll go
-elsewhere." Then I remembered that if I allowed him to go elsewhere I
-should lose all hold over him, and I consented to draw up the will.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily listened, a vague expression of pain in her pathetic eyes. Then
-this house, this room where she was sitting, was not hers, and a strange
-man would come soon and drive her away!</p>
-
-<p>'And he has left Ashwood to Mr. Price, is not that his name?' she said,
-abruptly.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; he has left Ashwood to Mr. Price.'</p>
-
-<p>'And when did he make this new will?'</p>
-
-<p>'I think it is just about a month ago.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily leaned forward, and her great eyes, full of light and sorrow, were
-fixed in space, her little pale <a name="100.png" class="pb"></a> hands
-linked, and the great mass of chestnut hair slipping from the comb. She
-was, in truth, at that moment the subject of a striking picture, and she
-was even more impressive when she said, speaking slowly: 'Then that old man
-was even wickeder than I thought. Oh, what I have learned in the last three
-or four weeks! Oh, what wickedness, what wickedness!... But go on,' she
-said, looking at Mr. Grandly; 'tell me all.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose there was some very serious reason, but on that point Mr.
-Burnett absolutely refused to answer me. He said his reasons were his own,
-and that he intended to leave his money to whom he pleased.'</p>
-
-<p>'There was&mdash;&mdash;' Julia stopped short, and looked interrogatively at
-Emily.</p>
-
-<p>'Go on, Julia, tell him; we have nothing to conceal.'</p>
-
-<p>'Mr. Burnett asked Emily to marry him a short time ago; she, of course,
-refused, and ever since he seemed more like&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'A madman than anything else,' broke in Emily. 'Oh, for the last month
-we have led a miserable life! It was a happy release.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is it possible,' said Mr. Grandly, 'that Mr. Burnett seriously
-contemplated marriage with Miss Watson?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, and her refusal seemed to drive him out of his mind.'</p>
-
-<a name="101.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I never was more surprised.' The placid face of the eminently
-respectable solicitor lapsed into contemplation. 'I often tried,' he said,
-suddenly, 'to divine the reason why he changed his will. Disappointed love
-seemed the only conceivable reason, but I rejected it as being quite
-inconceivable. Well, it only shows how little we know what is passing in
-each other's minds.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then,' said Julia, 'Mr. Burnett has divided his fortune, leaving
-Ashwood to Mr. Price, and all his invested money to Emily?'</p>
-
-<p>A look of pain passed over Mr. Grandly's benevolent face, and he
-answered: 'Unfortunately he has left everything to Mr. Price.'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm glad,' exclaimed Emily, 'that he has left me nothing. Once he
-thought fit to disinherit me because I would not marry him, I prefer not to
-have anything to do with his money.'</p>
-
-<p>Mr. Grandly and Julia looked at each other; they did not need to speak;
-each knew that the girl did not realise at once the full and irretrievable
-nature of this misfortune. The word 'destitute' was at present unrealised,
-and she only thought that she had been deprived of what she loved best in
-the world&mdash;Ashwood. Mr. Grandly glanced at her, and then speaking a little
-more hurriedly, said&mdash;</p>
-
-<a name="102.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I was saying just now that I only consented to draw up the will so that
-I might be able at some future time to induce Mr. Burnett to add a codicil
-to it. Later on I spoke to him again on the subject, and he promised to
-consider it, and a few days after he wrote to me, saying that he had
-decided to take my advice and add a codicil. Subsequently, in another
-letter he mentioned three hundred a year as being the sum he thought he
-would be in honour bound to leave Miss Watson. Unfortunately, he did not
-live long enough to carry this intention into execution. But the letters he
-addressed to me on the subject exist, and I have every hope that the heir,
-Mr. Price, will be glad to make some provision for his cousin.'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you any reason for thinking that Mr. Price will do so?' said
-Julia.</p>
-
-<p>'No. But it seems impossible for any honourable man to act
-otherwise.'</p>
-
-<p>'He cannot bear enmity against Emily, who of course knew nothing of his
-quarrel with his uncle. Do you know anything about Mr. Price? What is he?
-Where does he live?'</p>
-
-<p>'He is a literary man, I believe. I have heard that he writes
-plays!'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, a writer of plays.'</p>
-
-<a name="103.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Yes. I am glad of it; he may be easier to deal with. I daresay it is a
-mistaken notion, but one is apt to imagine that these artist folk are more
-generous with their money than ordinary mortals.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is he married?' said Julia, and involuntarily she glanced toward
-Emily.</p>
-
-<p>Mr. Grandly, too, looked toward the girl, and then he said: 'I don't
-know if Mr. Price is married; I hope not.'</p>
-
-<p>'Why do you hope so?' said Emily, suddenly.</p>
-
-<p>'Because if he isn't, there will only be one person to deal with. If he
-had a wife, she would have a voice in the matter; and in such circumstances
-as ours a man is easier to deal with. I earnestly hope Mr. Hubert Price is
-not married, and shall consider it a great point in our favour if on
-returning to town I find he is not.' Then assuming a lighter tone, for the
-nervous strain of the last ten minutes had been intense, he said: 'If he is
-not married, who knows&mdash;you may take a fancy to him, and he to you; then
-things would be just the same as before&mdash;only better.'</p>
-
-<p>'I should not marry him&mdash;I hate him already. I wonder how you can think
-of such a thing, Mr. Grandly? You know that he must be a very wicked man
-for uncle to have disinherited him. I have always heard that<a
-name="104.png" class="pb"></a>&mdash;but I don't know what I am saying.' Tears
-welled up into her eyes. 'I daresay my cousin is not so bad as&mdash;but I can
-talk no more.... I am very miserable, I have always been miserable, and I
-don't know why; I never did harm to any one.'</p>
-
-<p>Soon after Mr. Grandly bade the ladies good-bye. Julia followed him to
-the front door. 'You will do all you can to help us? That poor child is too
-young, too inexperienced, to realise what her position is.'</p>
-
-<p>'I know, I know,' said Mr. Grandly, extending both hands to Julia; 'in
-the whole course of my experience I never met with a sadder case. But we
-must not take too sad a view of it. Perhaps all will come right in the end.
-The young man cannot refuse to make good his uncle's intentions. He cannot
-see his cousin go to the workhouse. I will do the best I can for you. The
-moment I get back to London, I'll set inquiries on foot and find out his
-address, and when I have seen him I'll write. Good-bye.'</p>
-
-<p>Then, resolving that it were better to leave the girl to herself, Julia
-took up her key-basket and hurried away on household business. But in the
-middle of her many occupations she would now and then stop short to think.
-She had never heard of anything so cruel before. That poor girl&mdash;she must
-go to her; she must <a name="105.png" class="pb"></a> not leave her alone
-any longer. But it would be well to avoid the subject as much as possible.
-She must think of something to distract her thoughts. The pony-chaise. It
-might be the last time they had a carriage to go out in. But they could not
-go out driving on the day of the funeral.</p>
-
-<p>That evening, as they were going to bed, Emily said, lifting her sweet,
-pathetic little face, looking all love and gentleness: 'Oh, to think of a
-common, vulgar writer coming here, with a common, vulgar wife and a horrid
-crowd of children. Oh, Julia, doesn't it seem impossible? And yet I suppose
-it is true. I cannot bear to think of it. I can see the horrid children
-tramping up and down the stairs, breaking the things we have known and
-loved so long; and they will destroy all my flowers, and no one will
-remember to feed the poor swans. Dandy, my beloved, I shall be able to take
-you with me.' And she caught up the rough-haired terrier and hugged him,
-kissing his dear old head. 'Dandy is mine; they can't take him from me, can
-they? But do you think the swans belong to them or to us? I suppose it
-would be impossible to take them with us if we go to live in London. They
-couldn't live in a backyard.'</p>
-
-<p>'But, dearest Emily, who are "they"? You don't <a name="106.png"
-class="pb"></a> know that he is married&mdash;literary men don't often marry.
-For all you know, he is a handsome young man, who will fall madly in love
-with you.'</p>
-
-<p>'No one ever fell in love with me except that horrid old man&mdash;how I hate
-him, how I detest to think of it! I thought I should have died when he
-asked to marry me. The very memory of it is enough to make me hate all men,
-and prevent me from liking any one. I don't think I could like him; I
-should always see that wicked old man's hoary, wrinkled face in his.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, Emily, I cannot think how such ideas can come into your head. It is
-not right, indeed it isn't.' And this simple Englishwoman looked at this
-sensitive girl in sheer wonderment and alarm.</p>
-
-<p>'I only say what I think. I am glad the old man did disinherit me. I'm
-glad we are leaving Ashwood; I cannot abide the place when I think of
-him.... There, that is his chair. I can see him sitting in it now. He is
-grinning at us; he is saying, "Ha! ha! I have made beggars of you both."
-You remember how we used to tremble when we met his terrible old face on
-the stairs; you remember how he used to sit glaring at us all through
-dinner?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, Emily, I remember all that; but I do not think it natural that you
-should forget all the years of <a name="107.png" class="pb"></a> kindness;
-he was very good to you, and loved you very much, and if he forgot himself
-at the end of his life, we must remember the weakness of age.'</p>
-
-<p>'The hideousness of age,' Emily replied, in a low tone. The conversation
-paused, and then Julia said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'You are speaking wildly, Emily, and will live to regret your words. Let
-us speak no more of Mr. Burnett... I daresay you will find your cousin a
-charming young man. I should laugh if it were all to end in a marriage. And
-how glad I should be to see you off on your honeymoon, to bid you
-good-bye!'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, Julia, don't speak like that; you will never bid me good-bye. You
-will never leave me&mdash;promise me that&mdash;you are my only friend. Oh, Julia,
-promise me that you will never leave me.'</p>
-
-<p>Tears rose in Julia's eyes, and taking the girl in her arms, she said,
-'I'll never leave you, my dear girl, until you yourself wish it.'</p>
-
-<p>'I wish it? Oh, Julia, you do not know me. I have lost everything,
-Julia, but I mustn't lose you... After all, it doesn't so much matter, so
-long as we are not separated. I don't care about money, and we can have a
-nice little house in London all to ourselves. And if we get too hard up,
-we'll both go out as daily governesses. I think I could teach a little
-music, to <a name="108.png" class="pb"></a> young children, you know; you'd
-teach the older ones.' Emily looked at Julia inquiringly, and going over to
-the piano, attempted to play her favourite polka. Julia, who had once
-worked for her daily bread, and earned it in a sort of way by giving
-music-lessons, smiled sadly at the girl's ignorance of life.</p>
-
-<p>'I see,' said Emily, who was quick to divine every shade of sentiment
-passing in the minds of those she loved; 'you don't think I could teach
-even the little children.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I hope it will never come to your having to try.'</p>
-
-<p>'I must do something to get a living,' she replied, looking vaguely and
-wistfully into the fire. 'How unfortunate all this is&mdash;that horrid, horrid
-old man. But supposing he had asked you to marry him&mdash;he wasn't nice, but
-you are older than I, and if you had married him you would have become, in
-a way, my stepmother. But what a charming stepmother! Oh, how I should have
-loved that!'</p>
-
-<p>'Come, Emily, it is time to go to bed; you let your imagination run away
-with you.'</p>
-
-<p>'Julia, you are not cross because&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'No, dear, I'm not cross. I'm only a little tired. We have talked too
-long.'</p>
-
-<a name="109.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Emily's allusion to music-teaching had revived in Julia all her most
-painful memories. If this man were to cast them penniless out of Ashwood!
-Supposing, supposing that were to happen? Starving days, pale and haggard,
-rose up in her memory. What should she do, what should she do, and with
-that motherless girl dependent on her for food and clothes and shelter? She
-buried her face in the pillow and prayed that she might be saved from such
-a destiny.</p>
-
-<p>If this man&mdash;this unknown creature&mdash;were to refuse to help them, she and
-Emily would have to go to London, and she would have to support Emily as
-best she might. She would hold to her and fight for her with all her
-strength, but would she not fall vanquished in the fight; and then, and
-then? The same thoughts, questions, and fears turned in her head like a
-wheel, and it was not until dawn had begun to whiten the window-panes that
-she fell asleep.</p>
-
-<p>A few days after, the post brought a letter for Julia. After glancing
-hastily down the page she said: 'This is a letter from Mr. Grandly, and it
-is good news. Oh, what a relief!...'</p>
-
-<p>'Read it.'</p>
-
-<blockquote> <p>'"<span class="small-caps">Dear Mrs. Bentley</span>,&mdash;Immediately I arrived in London, I set to work to find
-out Mr. Price's address. It <a name="110.png" class="pb"></a> was the
-easiest matter in the world, for he has a play now running at one of the
-theatres. So I directed my letter to the theatre, and next morning I had a
-visit from him. After explaining to him the resources of the brilliant
-fortune he had come into, I told him of his uncle's intention to add a
-codicil to his will, leaving Miss Watson three hundred a year; I told him
-that this last will had left her entirely unprovided for. He said, at once,
-that he fully agreed with me, and that he would consider what was the most
-honourable course for him to take in regard to his 'cousin. This is exactly
-what he said, but his manner was such that before leaving he left no doubt
-in my mind whatever that he will act very generously indeed. I should not
-be surprised if he settled even more than the proposed three hundred a year
-on Miss Watson. He is a very quiet, thoughtful young man of about two or
-three and thirty. He looks poor, and I fancy he has lived through very hard
-times. He wears an air of sadness and disappointment which makes him
-attractive, and his manners are gentle and refined. I tell you these
-things, for I know they will interest you. I have not been able to find out
-if he is married, but I am sorry to say that his play has not succeeded. I
-should have found out more, but he was not in my office above ten minutes;
-he had to hurry away to keep an appointment at the theatre, for, as he
-explained, it was to be decided that very day if the play was to be taken
-out of the bills at the end of the week. He promised to call again, and our
-interview is fixed for eleven o'clock the day after to-morrow. In the
-meantime take heart, for I think I am justified in telling you I feel quite
-sanguine as to the result."'</p> </blockquote>
-
-<a name="111.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Well,' said Julia, laying down the letter, 'I don't think that anything
-could be more satisfactory, and just fancy dear old Mr. Grandly being able
-to describe a young man as well as that.'</p>
-
-<p>'He doesn't say if he is short or tall, or dark or fair.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, he doesn't. I think he might have told us something about his
-personal appearance, but it is a great relief to hear that he is not the
-vulgar Bohemian we have always understood him to be. Mr. Grandly says his
-manners are refined; you might take a fancy to him after all.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you don't know that he isn't married. I suppose Mr. Grandly wasn't
-able to find that out. I should like to know&mdash;but not because I want to
-marry him or any one else; only I don't like the idea of a great, vulgar
-woman, and a pack of children scampering about the place when we go.'</p>
-
-<p>'Do you dislike children so much, then, Emily?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't know that I ever thought about them; but I'm sure I shouldn't
-like his children. I dreamt of him last night. Do you believe in
-dreams?'</p>
-
-<p>'What did you dream?'</p>
-
-<p>'I cannot remember, but I woke up crying, feeling more unhappy than I
-ever felt in my life before. It is <a name="112.png" class="pb"></a>
-curious that I should dream of him last night, and that you should receive
-that letter this morning, isn't it?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't see anything strange in it. Nothing more natural than that you
-should dream about him, and it was certain that I should receive a letter
-from Mr. Grandly; he promised to write to me in a few days.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then you believe what is in that letter&mdash;I don't. Something tells me
-that he will not act kindly, but I don't know how.'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm quite sure you are wrong, Emily. Mr. Grandly would never have
-written this letter unless he knew for certain that Mr. Price would do all
-or more than he promised.'</p>
-
-<p>'I can't see from the letter that he has promised anything... Even if he
-does give me three hundred a year, I shall have to leave Ashwood.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I'm cross with you: of course, if you will insist on
-always looking at the melancholy side.... Now I'm going; I've to see after
-the housekeeping. Are you going into the garden?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, presently.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not seem to know what she was going to do. She looked out of
-the window, she lingered in the corridor; finally she wandered into the
-library. The <a name="113.png" class="pb"></a> quaint, old-fashioned room
-recalled her childhood to her. It was here she used to learn her lessons.
-Here was the mahogany table, at which she used to sit with her governess,
-learning to read and write; and there, far away at the other end of the
-long room, was the round table, where lay the old illustrated editions of
-<i>Gulliver's Travels</i> and <i>The Arabian Nights</i>, which she used to
-run to whenever her governess left the room. And at the bottom of the
-book-cases there were drawers full of strange papers; these drawers she
-used to open in fear and trembling, so mysterious did they seem to her. And
-there was the book-cases full of the tall folios, behind which lay, in dark
-and dim recesses, stores of books which she used to pull out, expecting at
-every moment to come upon long-forgotten treasures. She smiled now, as she
-recalled these childish imaginings, and lifting tenderly the coarse
-drugget, she looked at the great green globe which her fingers used to turn
-in infantile curiosity.</p>
-
-<p>Then leaving the library, she roamed through the house, pausing on the
-first landing to gaze on the picture of the fine gentleman in a red coat,
-his hand for ever on his sword. She remembered how she used to wonder whom
-he was going to kill, and how sure she used to feel that at last he would
-grant his adversary <a name="114.png" class="pb"></a> his life. And close
-by was the picture of the wind-mill, set on the edge of the down, with the
-shepherd driving sheep in the foreground. Her whole life seemed drenched
-with tears at the thought of parting with these things. Every room was full
-of memories for her. She was a little girl when she came to live at
-Ashwood, and the room at the top of the stairs had been her nursery. There
-were the two beds; both were now dismantled and bare. It was in the little
-bed in the corner that she used to sleep; it was in the old four-poster
-that her nurse slept. And there was the very place, in front of the fire,
-where she used to have her tea. The table had disappeared, and the grate,
-how rusty it was! In the far corner, by the window, there used to be a
-press, in which nurse kept tea and sugar. That press had been removed. The
-other press was there still, and throwing open the doors she surveyed the
-shelves. She remembered the very peg on which her hat and jacket used to
-hang. And the long walks in the great park, which was to her, then, a world
-of wonderment!</p>
-
-<p>She wandered about the old corridor, in and out of odd rooms, all
-associated with her childhood&mdash;quaint old rooms, many of them lumber rooms,
-full of odd corners and old cupboards, the meaning of which she <a
-name="115.png" class="pb"></a> used to strive to divine. How their silence
-and mystery used to thrill her little soul! Faded rooms whose mystery had
-departed, but whose gloom was haunted with tenderest recollections. In one
-corner was the reading-chair in which Mr. Burnett used to sit. At that time
-she used to sit on his knee, and when the chair gave way beneath their
-weight, he had said she was too big a girl to sit on his knee any longer.
-The words had seemed to her a little cruel. She had forgotten the old
-chair, but now she remembered the very moment when the servants came to
-take it away.</p>
-
-<p>Under the window were some fragments of a china bowl which she had
-broken when quite a little child. There was a hoop-stick and the hoop which
-had been taken down to the blacksmith's to be mended. He had mended it, but
-she did not remember ever using it again. And there was an old box of
-water-colours, with which she used to colour all the uncoloured drawings in
-her picture-books. Emily took the hoop-stick, the old doll, and the broken
-box of water-colours, and packed them away carefully. She would be able to
-find room for them in the little house in London where she and Julia were
-going to live.</p>
-
-<p>A few days after, the post brought letters from Mr. <a name="116.png"
-class="pb"></a> Grandly, one for Emily and one for Julia. Julia's letter
-ran as follows:</p>
-
-<blockquote>
-
-<p>'<span class="small-caps">Dear Mrs. Bentley</span>,&mdash;-I write by this
-post to Miss Watson, advising her that her cousin, Mr. Price, is most
-anxious to make her acquaintance, and asking her to send the dog-cart
-to-morrow to meet him at the station. I must take upon myself the
-responsibility for this step. I have seen Mr. Price again, and he has
-confirmed me in my good opinion of him. He seems most anxious, not only to
-do everything right, but to make matters as pleasant and agreeable as
-possible for his cousin. He has written me a letter recognising Miss
-Watson's claim upon him, and constituting himself her trustee. I have not
-had yet time to prepare a deed of gift, but there can be little doubt that
-Miss Watson's position is now quite secure. So far so good; but more than
-ever does the only clear and satisfactory way out of this miserable
-business seem to me to be a marriage between Mr. Hubert Price and Miss
-Watson. I have already told you that he is a nice, refined young man, of
-gentlemanly bearing, good presence, and excellent speech, though a trifle
-shy and reserved; and, as I have since discovered that he is not married, I
-have taken upon myself the responsibility of advising him to jump into a
-train and to go and tell his cousin the conclusion he has come to regarding
-the will of the late Mr. Burnett. As I have said, he is a shy man, and it
-was some time before I could induce him to take so decisive a step; he
-wanted to meet Miss Watson in my office, but I succeeded in persuading him.
-He will go down to you to-morrow by the five o'clock, and I need not
-impress upon <a name="117.png" class="pb"></a> you the necessity that you
-should use your influence with Miss Watson, and that his reception should
-be as cordial as circumstances permit. I have only to add that I see no
-need that you should show this letter to Miss Watson, for the very fact of
-knowing that we desired to bring about a marriage might prejudice her
-against this young man, whom she otherwise cannot fail to find
-charming.'</p> </blockquote>
-
-<p>Hearing some one at her door, Julia put the letter away. It was
-Emily.</p>
-
-<p>'I've just received a letter from Mr. Grandly, saying that that man is
-coming here to-day, and that we are to send the dog-cart for him.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is not that the very best thing that&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'We cannot remain here, we must leave a note for him, or something of
-that kind. I wouldn't remain here to meet him for worlds. I really
-couldn't, Julia.'</p>
-
-<p>'And why not, Emily?'</p>
-
-<p>'To meet the man who is coming to turn me out of Ashwood!'</p>
-
-<p>'How do you know that he is coming to turn you out of Ashwood? You
-imagine these things.... Do you suppose that Mr. Grandly would send him
-down here if he did not know what his intentions were?'</p>
-
-<p>'But we shall have to leave Ashwood.'</p>
-
-<p>'Very likely, but not in the way you imagine. Remember, <a
-name="118.png" class="pb"></a> Mr. Price is your cousin; you may like him
-very much. Let's be guided by Mr. Grandly; I have not seen your letter, but
-apparently he advises us to remain here and receive him.'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't think I can, Julia. I have misgivings.'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you been dreaming again?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I've not been dreaming, but I have misgivings.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are a silly little goose, Emily. Come and give me a kiss, and
-promise to take my advice.'</p>
-
-<p>'Dearest Julia, you do love me, don't you? Promise me that we shall not
-be separated, and then I don't mind.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, dear, I promise you that, and you will promise me to try to like
-your cousin?'</p>
-
-<p>'I'll try, Julia, but I'm awfully frightened, and&mdash;I don't think I could
-like him, no matter what he was like. I feel a sort of hatred in my heart.
-Don't you know what I mean?' And the girl looked questioningly into her
-friend's eyes.</p>
-
-<a name="119.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>IX</h2>
-
-<p>'<span class="small-caps">I am</span> Miss Watson,' she said in her low
-musical voice, 'and this is my friend, Mrs. Bentley.' Hubert bowed, and
-sought for words. He found none, and the irritating silence was broken
-again by Miss Watson. 'Won't you sit down?' she said.</p>
-
-<p>'Thank you.' He pulled off his gloves. The pained, troubled look which
-he had met in Miss Watson's face seemed a reproach, and he regretted not
-having followed his own idea, and invited the young lady to meet him at Mr.
-Grandly's office. He glanced nervously from one lady to the other.</p>
-
-<p>'I hope you have had a pleasant journey, Mr. Price,' said Mrs. Bentley.
-'The country is looking very beautiful just at present. Do you know this
-part of the country?' Mrs. Bentley's words were very welcome, and Hubert
-replied eagerly&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'No; I do not know the country at all well. I have been very little out
-of London for some years, but I hope now to see more of the country. This
-is a beautiful place.'</p>
-
-<a name="120.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>At that moment he met Mrs. Bentley's eyes, and, feeling that he was
-touching on delicate ground, he stopped speaking. When he turned his head,
-he met Miss Watson's great sad eyes, which seemed to absorb the entire
-face, fixed upon him. They expressed such depth of pathetic appeal that he
-trembled with apprehension, and the instinct in him was to beg for pardon.
-But it became suddenly necessary to say something, and, speaking at random,
-his head full of whirling words, he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Of course nothing could be more sad than my poor uncle's death,&mdash;so
-unexpected... Having lived so long together, you must have&mdash;&mdash;' Then it was
-Hubert's turn to look appealingly at Miss Watson; but her great eyes seemed
-to say, 'Go on, go on; heap cruelty on cruelty!' Then he plunged
-desperately, hoping to retrieve his mistakes. 'He died about a month ago.
-Mr. Grandly told me I should still find you here, so I thought&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>The intensity of his emotion perhaps caused Hubert to accentuate his
-words, so that they conveyed a meaning different from that which he
-intended. Certainly his hesitations were capable of misinterpretation, and
-Miss Watson said, her voice trembling,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Of course we know we have no right here, we are <a name="121.png"
-class="pb"></a> intruding; but we are making preparations.... I daresay
-that to-morrow we shall be able to&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, I beg pardon, Miss Watson; let me assure you ... I am sorry
-if&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>Taking a little handkerchief out of her black dress, Emily covered her
-face in her thin, tiny hands. She sobbed aloud, and ran out of the room.
-Hubert turned to Mrs. Bentley, his face full of consternation.</p>
-
-<p>'I am very sorry, but she did not give me time to speak. Will you go and
-fetch her, Mrs. Bentley? I want to tell her I hope she will never leave
-Ashwood. ... I believe she thinks that I came down here to ask her to leave
-as soon as possible. It is really quite awful that she should think such a
-thing.'</p>
-
-<p>'She is an exceedingly sensitive girl, and is now a little overwrought.
-The events of the last month have proved too much for her.'</p>
-
-<p>'Mr. Grandly informed me that it was Mr. Burnett's intention to add a
-codicil to his will, leaving Miss Watson three hundred a year. This money I
-am prepared to give her, and I'm quite sure she is welcome to stay here as
-long as she pleases. Indeed, she will do me a great favour by remaining.
-Please go and tell her. I cannot bear to see a girl cry; to hear her sob
-like that is quite terrible.'</p>
-
-<a name="122.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'You will be able to tell her yourself during the course of the evening.
-I think it will come better from you.'</p>
-
-<p>'After what has happened, it will be very difficult for me to meet her
-until she is informed that she is mistaken. I charged Mr. Grandly to
-explain everything in his letter. Apparently he omitted to do so.'</p>
-
-<p>'He only said you wanted to see Emily on a matter of business. Of course
-we did not expect such generosity.'</p>
-
-<p>They were standing quite close together, and suddenly Hubert became
-conscious of Mrs. Bentley's beauty. Her blue eyes were at that moment full
-of tender admiration for the instinctive generosity which Hubert so
-unwittingly exhibited, and her eyes told what was passing in her soul.
-Suddenly they both seemed to understand each other better, and, playing
-with the bracelet on her arm, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'You do not know Emily; she is strangely sensitive. But I will go and
-try to persuade her to return.... Although only distantly related, you are
-cousins, after all&mdash;are you not?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, we are cousins, but the relationship is remote. Tell her
-everything; beg of her to come down-stairs.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert imagined Emily's little black figure thrown <a name="123.png"
-class="pb"></a> upon her bed, sobbing convulsively. He was very much
-agitated, and looked about the room, at first hardly seeing it. At last its
-novelty drew his thoughts from his cousin's tears, and he wondered what was
-the history of the house. 'The old man,' he thought, 'bought it all,
-furniture and ancestors, from some ruined landowner, and attempted very few
-alterations&mdash;that's clear.' Then he reproached himself. 'How could I have
-been so stupid? I did not know what I was saying. I was so horribly
-nervous. Those strange eyes of hers quite upset me. I do hope Mrs. Bentley
-will tell her that I wish to act generously, that I am prepared to do
-everything in my power to make her happy. Poor little thing! She looks as
-if she had never been happy.' Again the room drew Hubert's thoughts away
-from his cousin. It was still lit with the faint perfumed glow of the
-sunset. The paint of the old decorations was cracked and faded. A man in a
-plum-coloured coat with gold facings fixed his eyes upon him, and the tall
-lady in blue satin had no doubt played there in short clothes. He walked up
-and down, he turned over the music on the piano, and, hearing a step,
-looked round. It was only the servant coming to tell him that his room was
-ready.</p>
-
-<p>He dressed for dinner, hoping to find the two ladies <a name="124.png"
-class="pb"></a> in the drawing-room, and it was a disappointment to find
-only Mrs. Bentley there.</p>
-
-<p>'I have told Emily everything you said. She is very grateful, and begs
-of me to thank you for your kind intentions. But I am afraid you must
-excuse her absence from dinner. I really don't think she is in a fit state
-to come down; she couldn't possibly take part in the conversation.'</p>
-
-<p>'But why? I hope she isn't ill? Had we better send for the doctor?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh no; she'll be all right in the morning. She has been crying. She
-suffers from depression of spirits. She is, I assure you, all right,' said
-Mrs. Bentley, replying to Hubert's alarmed and questioning face. 'I assure
-you there is no need for you to reproach yourself. Dinner is ready.' She
-took his arm, and they went into the dining-room.</p>
-
-<p>No further mention was made of Mr. Burnett, of money matters, or of the
-young lady up-stairs; and with considerable tact Mrs. Bentley introduced
-the subject of literature, alluding gracefully to Hubert's position as a
-dramatist.</p>
-
-<p>'Your play, <i>Divorce</i>, is now running at the Queen's Theatre?'</p>
-
-<p>No; I'm sorry to say it was taken out of the bills <a name="125.png"
-class="pb"></a> last Saturday. Saturday night was the last
-performance.'</p>
-
-<p>'That was not a long run. And the papers spoke so favourably of it.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is a play that only appeals to the few.' And, encouraged by Mrs.
-Bentley's manner, Hubert told her how happy endings and comic love-scenes
-were essential to secure a popular success.</p>
-
-<p>'I am afraid you will think me very stupid, but I do not quite
-understand.'</p>
-
-<p>In a quiet, unobtrusive way Hubert was a graceful talker, and he knew
-how to adapt his theme, and bring it within the circle of the sympathies of
-his listeners. There was some similarity of temperament between himself and
-Mrs. Bentley; they were both quiet, fair, meditative Saxons. She lent her
-whole mind to the conversation, interested in the account that the young
-man gave of his dramatic aspirations.</p>
-
-<p>From the dining-room window looking over the park the long road wound
-through the vaporous country. The town stood in the middle distance, its
-colour blotted out, and its smoke hardly distinguishable. In the room a
-yellow dress turned grey, and the gold of a bracelet grew darker, and the
-pink of delicate finger-nails was no longer visible. But the <a
-name="126.png" class="pb"></a> pensive dusk of the dining-room, which
-blackened the claret in the decanters, leaving only the faintest ruby glow
-in the glass which Hubert raised to his lips, suited the tenor of the
-conversation, which had wandered from the dramatic to the social side of
-the question. What did he think of divorce? She sighed, and he wondered
-what her story might be.</p>
-
-<p>They passed out of the dining-room, and stood on the gravel, watching
-the night gathering in the open country. In the light of the moon, which
-had just risen above the woods, the white road grew whiter, the town was
-faintly seen in the tide of blue vapour, which here and there allowed a
-field to appear. In the foreground a great silver fir, spiky and solitary,
-rose up in the blue night. Beyond it was seen a corner of the ornamental
-bridge. The island and its shadow were one black mass rising from the park
-up to the level of the moon, which, a little to the right, between the town
-and the island, lay reflected in a narrow strip of water. Farther away some
-reeds were visible in the illusive light, and the meditative chatter of
-dozing ducks stirred the silence which wrapped the country like a
-cloak.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood looking at the landscape. The fragrance of
-his cigar, the presence of <a name="127.png" class="pb"></a> the woman, the
-tenderness of the hour, combined to make him strangely happy; his past life
-seemed to him like a harsh, cruel pain that had suddenly ceased. More than
-he had ever desired seemed to be fulfilled; the reality exceeded the dream.
-What greater happiness than to live here, and with this woman! His thoughts
-paused, for he had forgotten the girl up-stairs. She was not happy; but he
-would make her happy&mdash;of that he was quite certain. At that moment Mrs.
-Bentley said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I hope you like your home. Is not the prospect a lovely one?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; but I was thinking at that moment of Emily. I suppose I must
-accustom myself to call her by her Christian name. She is my cousin, and we
-are going to live together. But, by the way, she cannot stay here alone. I
-hope&mdash;I may trust that you will remain with her?'</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Bentley turned her face towards him; he noticed the look of
-pleasure that had passed into it.</p>
-
-<p>'Thank you; it is very good of you. I shall be glad to remain with Emily
-as long as she cares for my society. It is needless to say I shall do my
-best to deserve your approval.'</p>
-
-<a name="128.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<a name="129.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<div class="image"><a href="images/image04.jpeg"><img src="images/image04-thumb.jpeg"
-align="left" alt="[drawing]"></a>
-
-"They dined at the Caf&eacute; Royal." </div>
-
-<br>
-
-<a name="130.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Her voice fell, and he heard her sigh, and in his happiness it seemed to
-him to be a pity that he should find unhappiness in others.</p>
-
-<p>They went into the drawing-room. Mrs. Bentley asked him if he liked
-music, and she went to the piano and sang some Scotch songs very sweetly.
-Then she took a book from the table and bade him good-night. She was sure
-that he would excuse her. She must go and see after Emily.</p>
-
-<p>When the door closed, the woman who had just left him seemed like some
-one he had seen in a dream; and still more shadowy and illusive did the
-girl seem&mdash;that pale and plaintive beauty, looking like a pastel, who had
-so troubled him with her enigmatic eyes! And the lodging-house that he had
-left only a few hours ago! and Rose.</p>
-
-<p>On Sunday he had taken Rose out to dinner. They dined at the
-Caf&eacute;-Royal. He had tried to talk to her about Hamilton Brown's new drama,
-which they had just heard would follow <i>Divorce</i>; but he was unable to
-detach his thoughts from Ashwood and the ladies he was going to visit
-to-morrow evening. Hubert and Rose had felt like two school-fellows, one of
-whom is leaving school; the link that had bound them had snapped;
-henceforth their ways lay separate; and <a name="131.png" class="pb"></a>
-they were sad at parting just as school-friends are sad.</p>
-
-<p>'You are not rich; you offered to lend me money once. I want to lend you
-some now.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes; five shillings, wasn't it?'</p>
-
-<p>'It doesn't matter what the sum was&mdash;we were both very poor
-then&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'And I'm still poorer now.'</p>
-
-<p>'All the more reason why you should allow me to help you.... Allow me to
-write you a cheque for a hundred pounds. I assure you I can afford it.'</p>
-
-<p>'I think I had better not.... I have some things I can sell.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you must not sell your things. Indeed, you must allow me&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I think I'd rather not. I shall be all right&mdash;that is to say, if Ford
-engages me for Brown's new piece; and I think he will.'</p>
-
-<p>'But if he doesn't?'</p>
-
-<p>'Then,' she said, with a sweet and natural smile, 'I'll write to you....
-We have been excellent friends&mdash;comrades&mdash;have we not?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, we have indeed, and I shall never forget. There is my address;
-that will always find me.'</p>
-
-<p>He had written a play&mdash;a play that the most competent <a name="132.png"
-class="pb"></a> critics had considered a work of genius; in any case, a
-play that had interested his generation more than any other. It had failed,
-and failed twice; but did that prove anything? Fortune had deserted him,
-and he had been unable to finish <i>The Gipsy</i>. Was it the fault of
-circumstances that he had not been able to finish that play? or was it that
-the slight vein of genius that had been in him once had been exhausted? He
-remembered the article in <i>The Modern Review</i>, and was frightened to
-think that the critic might have divined the truth. Once it had seemed
-impossible to finish that play; but fortune had come to his aid, accident
-had made him master of his destiny; he could spend three years, five years
-if he liked, on <i>The Gipsy</i>. But why think of the play at all? What
-did it matter even if he never wrote it? There were many things to do in
-life besides writing plays. There was life! His life was henceforth his
-own, and he could live it as he pleased. What should he do with it? To whom
-should he give it? Should he keep it all for himself and his art? It were
-useless to make plans. All he knew for certain was that henceforth he was
-master of his own life, and could dispense it as he pleased.</p>
-
-<p>And then, in sensuous curiosity, his thoughts turned <a name="133.png"
-class="pb"></a> on the pleasure of life in this beautiful house, in the
-society of two charming women.</p>
-
-<p>'Perhaps I shall marry one of them. Which do I like the better? I
-haven't the least idea.' And then, as his thoughts detached themselves, he
-remembered Emily's tears.</p>
-
-<a name="134.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>X</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">It</span> was a day of English summer, and the
-meadows and trees drowsed in the moist atmosphere; a few white clouds hung
-lazily in the blue sky; the garden was bright with geraniums and early
-roses, and the closely cropped privets were in full leaf. Hubert's senses
-were taken with the beauty of the morning, and there came the thought, so
-delicious, 'All this is mine.' He noticed the glitter of the greenhouses,
-and thought the cawing of some young rooks a sweet sound; a great
-tortoiseshell cat lay basking in the middle of the greensward, whisking its
-furry tail. Hubert stroked the animal; it arched its back, and rubbed
-itself against his legs. At that moment a half-bred fox-terrier barked
-noisily at him; he heard some one calling the dog, and saw a slight black
-figure hastening down one of the side-walks. Despite the dog's attempts on
-his legs, he ran forward.</p>
-
-<p>'Emily! Emily!' he called. She stopped, turned, and stood looking at
-him.</p>
-
-<a name="135.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'My dear cousin,' he said. 'I'm sorry about last night. I hope that Mrs.
-Bentley has told you. I begged of her to do so.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; she told me of your kind intentions. I have to thank you.'</p>
-
-<p>They walked on in silence, neither knowing what to say.</p>
-
-<p>'Go away, Dandy!' said Emily, thrusting her black silk parasol at the
-dog, who had begun an attack on Hubert's trousers. The dog retreated;
-Hubert laughed.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm afraid he doesn't like me.'</p>
-
-<p>'He'll soon get to know you. Are you fond of animals?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't know that I am, particularly.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh!' she said, looking at him reproachfully, 'how can you?' Her eyes
-seemed to say, 'I never can like you after that.' 'I adore animals,' she
-said. 'My dear dog&mdash;there is nothing in the world I love as I love my
-Dandy; come here, dear.' The dog came, wagging his tail, putting back his
-ears, knowing he was going to be caressed. Emily stooped down, took his
-rough head in her hands, and kissed him. 'Is he not a dear?' she said,
-looking up; and then she said, 'I hope you won't object to having him in
-the house;' her face clouded.</p>
-
-<a name="136.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Oh, my dear Emily, how can you ask such a question? I shall never
-object to anything you desire.' The conversation paused, and they walked
-some paces in silence. Emily had just begun to speak of her flowers, when
-they came upon the gardener, who was standing in consternation over the
-fragments of a broken mowing-machine. Jack&mdash;that was the donkey&mdash;had been
-left to himself just for a moment. It was impossible to say what wild freak
-had taken him; but instead of waiting, as he was expected to wait,
-stolidly, he had started off on a wild career, regardless of the safety of
-the machine. At the first bound it had come in contact with a flower-vase,
-which had been sent in many pieces over the sward; at the second it had met
-with some stone coping; and at the third it had turned over in complete
-dissolution, and Jack was free to tear up the turf with his hoofs, until
-finally his erratic course was stopped by the small boy who was responsible
-for the animal's behaviour. The arrival of Hubert and Emily saved the small
-boy from many a cuff and the donkey from a kick or two; and Jack stood amid
-the ruin he had created, as quiet and as docile a creature as the mind
-could imagine.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, you&mdash;you wicked Jack! Who would have <a name="137.png"
-class="pb"></a> thought it of you?' said Emily, throwing her arms round the
-animal's neck. 'And at your age, too! This is my old donkey,' she said,
-turning her dreamy eyes on Hubert. 'I used to ride him every day until
-about two years ago. I love my dear old Jack, and would not have him beaten
-for worlds, although he is so wicked as to break the mowing-machine. Look
-what you have done to the flower-vase.' The animal shook its long ears.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert and Emily strolled down a long walk, wondering what they should
-talk about.</p>
-
-<p>'These are really very pretty grounds,' he said at last. 'I am sure I
-shall enjoy myself immensely here.' The remark appeared to him to be of
-doubtful taste, and he hastened to add, 'That is to say, if I have
-completely made it up with my pretty cousin.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you have not seen the place yet,' she said, speaking still with a
-certain tremor in her voice. 'You haven't even seen the gardens. Come, and
-I'll show them to you.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert would have preferred to walk with her through these ornamental
-swards; and he liked the espalier apple-trees with which the garden was
-divided better than the glare and heat of the greenhouses into which she
-took him.</p>
-
-<a name="138.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Do you care for flowers?'</p>
-
-<p>'Not very much.'</p>
-
-<p>'These are all my flowers,' she said, pointing to many rows of
-flower-pots. 'Those are Julia's. You see I run a line of thread around
-mine, so that there shall be no mistake. She is not nearly so careful as I
-am, and it isn't nice to find that the plants you have been tending for
-weeks have been spoilt by over-watering. I don't say she doesn't love them,
-but she forgets them.... Just look at those; they are devoured by insects.
-They want to be taken out and given a thorough cleansing. Even then I doubt
-if they would come out right,&mdash;a plant never forgives you; it is just like
-a human being.'</p>
-
-<p>'And doesn't a human being ever forgive?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, I didn't mean that!' she said, blushing; 'but sometimes I could cry
-over the poor plants which she neglects. I daresay you will think me very
-ridiculous, but I do cry sometimes, and sometimes I cannot resist taking
-them out on the sly, and giving them a thoroughly good syringing,&mdash;only you
-must not tell her; we have agreed not to touch each other's flowers. But I
-cannot bear to see the poor things dying. How do we know that they do not
-suffer?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't think it probable.'</p>
-
-<a name="139.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'But we don't know for certain,' she said, fixing her great eyes on him.
-'Do we?'</p>
-
-<p>'We know nothing for certain,' he answered; and then he said, 'You and
-Mrs. Bentley have lived a long time together?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; not very long. About a couple of years. I was about thirteen when I
-came to Ashwood. I am now eighteen. Mrs. Bentley is a sort of connection.
-She is very poor&mdash;that is why Mr. Burnett asked her to come and live here;
-besides, as I grew up I wanted a companion. She has been very good to me.
-We have been very happy together&mdash;at least, as happy as one may be; for I
-don't think that any one is ever very happy. Have you been very happy?'</p>
-
-<p>'I have not always been happy. But tell me more about Mrs. Bentley.'</p>
-
-<p>'There is little more to tell. I naturally love her very much. She
-nursed me when I was ill&mdash;and I'm often ill; she taught me all I know; she
-cheered me when I was sad&mdash;when I thought my heart would break; when
-everybody else seemed unkind she was kind. Besides, I could not remain here
-without her.' Emily lowered her eyes, and the conversation seemed to
-pause.</p>
-
-<p>'I have arranged all that,' Hubert answered <a name="140.png"
-class="pb"></a> hurriedly. 'I spoke to her last night, and she has
-consented to remain.'</p>
-
-<p>'That is very good of you.' Emily raised her eyes and looked shyly at
-Hubert; and then, as if doubtful of herself, she said, 'Do you like her?
-I'm sure you do. Every one does. Do you not think she is very
-handsome?'</p>
-
-<p>'I think her an exceedingly pleasant woman, and I'm sure we shall all
-get on very well together.'</p>
-
-<p>'But don't you think her very handsome?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; she is a handsome woman.'</p>
-
-<p>Nothing more was said. Emily drew meditatively on the gravel with the
-point of her parasol. The gardeners looked up from their work.</p>
-
-<p>'I have to go now,' she said, raising her eyes timidly, 'to feed the
-swans. You would not care to go so far?'</p>
-
-<p>'On the contrary, I should like it, of all things. A walk by the water
-on a day like this will be quite a treat.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then will you wait a moment? I will go and fetch the bread.' She
-returned soon after with a small basket; and a large retriever, tied up in
-the corner of the yard, barked and lugged at his chain. 'He knows where I
-am going, and is afraid I shall forget him&mdash;aren't you, <a name="141.png"
-class="pb"></a> dear old Don? You wouldn't like to miss a walk with your
-mistress, would you, dear?' The dog bounded and rushed from side to side;
-it was with difficulty that Emily loosed him. Once free, he galloped down
-the drive, returning at intervals for a caress and a sniff at the basket
-which his mistress carried. 'There's nothing there for you, my beautiful
-Don!'</p>
-
-<p>The drive sloped from the house down to the artificial water, passing
-under some large elms; and in the twilight of the branches where the
-sunlight played, and the silence was tremulous with wings, Hubert felt that
-Emily had forgiven him. She wore the same black dress that he had admired
-her in the night before; her waist was confined by the same black band; but
-the chestnut hair seemed more beautiful beneath the black silk sunshade,
-leaned so gracefully, the black handle held between thumb and forefinger.
-And the little black figure seemed a part of the beautiful English park,
-now so green and fragrant in all the flower and sunlight of June, and
-decorated with a blue summer sky, and white clouds moving lazily over the
-tops of the trees. And the impression of the beautiful park was enforced by
-its reflection, which lay, with the mute magic of reflected things, in the
-still water, stirred only when, with exquisite motion of webbed feet, the
-<a name="142.png" class="pb"></a> swans propelled their freshness to and
-fro, balancing themselves in the current where they knew the bread must
-surely fall.</p>
-
-<p>'They are waiting for me. Cannot you see their black eyes turned towards
-the bridge?' And she threw the bread from the basket, and the beautiful
-birds unbent their curved necks, devouring it voraciously under the
-water.</p>
-
-<p>In the larger portion of this artificial lake there were two islands,
-thickly wooded. In the smaller, which lay behind Emily and Hubert, there
-was one small island covered with reeds and low bushes, and this was a
-favourite haunt for the waterfowl, which now came swimming forward, not
-daring to approach too near the dangerous swans.</p>
-
-<p>'These are my friends,' said Emily. 'They will follow me to the other
-end, and I shall be able to feed them as we walk along the meadow.'</p>
-
-<p>Don and Dandy bounded through the tall grass; sometimes foolishly giving
-chase to the birds that rose up out of the golden grasses, barking in mad
-eagerness&mdash;sometimes pursuing a hare into the distant woods. The last chase
-had led them far, and both dogs returned panting to walk till they
-recovered breath by their mistress's side; and to satisfy the retriever's
-<a name="143.png" class="pb"></a> affection Emily held one hand to him.
-Playing gently with his ears, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Did you ever see much of Mr. Burnett?'</p>
-
-<p>'Not since I was a boy, ten or twelve years ago, when I was at the
-University. There was absolutely no reason for his doing what he did.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; there was,' she said in a strangely decisive tone.</p>
-
-<p>'May I ask&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I do not know if I ought to tell you. It would be better not to. You
-know,' she continued, speaking now with a nervous tremor in her voice,
-'that I do not want you to think that I am so very disappointed. I do not
-know that I am disappointed at all. You have acted so generously, and it
-will be pleasanter to live here with you than with that old man.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation fell; but the sweet meadow seemed to induce
-confidences, and they were so happy in their youth and the sorcery of the
-sunshine. 'Five years ago I wrote to him,' said Hubert, speaking very
-slowly, 'asking him to lend me fifty pounds, and he refused. Since then I
-have not heard from him.' At the end of a long silence, the girl said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'So long as you know that I am no longer angry <a name="144.png"
-class="pb"></a> with him for having disinherited me, I do not mind telling
-you the reason. Two months before he died he asked me to marry him, and I
-refused.'</p>
-
-<p>They walked several yards without speaking.</p>
-
-<p>'Do you not think I was right? I was only eighteen, and he was over
-sixty.'</p>
-
-<p>'It seems to me quite shocking that he could have even contemplated such
-a thing.'</p>
-
-<p>'But look at these poor ducks; they have followed us all the way, and I
-have forgotten to feed them!' Taking out all the bread that remained in the
-basket, Emily threw it to the ducks that had collected where the dammed-up
-stream that filled the lake trickled over a wooden sluice. There was a
-plank by which to cross the deep cutting. Hubert and Emily paused, and
-stood gazing at the large beech wood that swept over some rising ground.
-Don had not been seen for some time, and they both shouted to him.
-Presently a black mass was seen bounding through the flowers, and the
-panting animal once more ensconced himself by his mistress's side.</p>
-
-<p>'I was very fond of Mr. Burnett,' she said, 'but I could not marry him.
-I could not marry any man I did not love.'</p>
-
-<p>'And because you refused to marry him, he did <a name="145.png"
-class="pb"></a> not mention you in his will. I never heard of such
-selfishness before!'</p>
-
-<p>'Men are always selfish,' she said sententiously. 'But it really does
-not matter; things are just the same; he hasn't succeeded in altering
-anything&mdash;at least, not for the worse. We shall get on very well
-together.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused. Then Emily went on: 'You won't tell any one I
-told you? I only told you because I did not want you to think me selfish. I
-was afraid that after the foolish way I behaved last night you might think
-I hated you. Indeed, I do not. Perhaps everything has happened for the
-best. I was very fond of the old man. I gave him my whole heart; no father
-ever had a daughter more attached; but I could not marry him. And it was
-the remembrance of my love for him that made me burst out crying. I do not
-think I realised until I saw you how cruelly I had been treated. But you
-won't tell any one? You won't tell Mrs. Bentley? She knows, of course; but
-do not tell her that I told you. I do not care that my feelings should be
-made a subject of discussion. You promise me?'</p>
-
-<p>'I promise you.'</p>
-
-<p>They had now reached the tennis-lawn. The gong <a name="146.png"
-class="pb"></a> sounded, and Emily said, 'That is lunch, and we shall find
-Julia waiting for us in the dining-room.' It was as she said. Mrs. Bentley
-was standing by the sideboard, her basket of keys in her hand; she had not
-quite finished her housekeeping, and was giving some last instructions to
-the butler. Hubert noticed that the place at the head of the table was for
-him, and he sat down a little embarrassed, to carve a chicken. So much home
-after so many years of homelessness seemed strange.</p>
-
-<a name="147.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XI</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">On</span> the third day, as soon as breakfast
-was over, Hubert introduced the subject of his departure. Julia waited, but
-as Emily did not speak, she said, 'We thought you liked the country better
-than town.'</p>
-
-<p>'So I do, but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'He's tired of us, and we had better leave,' Emily said, abruptly.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert started a little; he looked appealingly at Julia, and seeing the
-look of genuine pain upon his face, she took pity on him. 'You should not
-speak like that, Emily dear; I can see that you pain Mr. Price very
-much.'</p>
-
-<p>'I hope, Emily, that you will stay here as long as you like,' he said,
-in a low, gentle voice; 'as long as it is convenient and agreeable to
-you.'</p>
-
-<p>'We cannot stay here without you,' Emily replied; 'we are your
-guests.'</p>
-
-<p>'And,' said Julia, smiling, 'if there are guests, there must be a host.
-But if you have business in London, of course you must go.'</p>
-
-<a name="148.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I was not thinking of myself,' said Hubert, 'but of you ladies. I was
-afraid that you were already tired of me; that you might like to be left
-alone; that you had business, preparations. I daresay I was all wrong; but
-if Emily knew&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm sorry, Hubert; I did not mean to offend you. I'm very unlucky.
-You'll forgive me.'</p>
-
-<p>'I've nothing to forgive; I only hope that you'll never think again that
-I want to get rid of you. I hope that you'll stop at Ashwood as long as
-ever it suits you to do so. I don't see how I can say more.'</p>
-
-<p>'I like to stop here as long as you are here,' Emily said, in a low
-voice. 'That is all I meant.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then we're all of one mind, I don't want to go back to London. If you
-don't find me in your way, I shall be delighted to stay.'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course,' said Julia, 'we poor country folk can hardly hope to amuse
-you.'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't know about that!' exclaimed Emily. 'Where would he find any one
-to play and sing to him in the evenings as you can?'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused, and all were happier that morning, though none
-knew why. Days passed, desultory and sweet, and with a pile of books about
-him, he lay in a long cane chair under the trees; then the <a
-name="149.png" class="pb"></a> book would drop on his knees, and blowing
-smoke in curling wreaths, he lost himself in dramatic meditations. It was
-pleasant to see that Emily had grown innocently, childishly fond of her
-cousin, and her fondness expressed itself in a number of pretty ways. 'Now,
-Hubert, Hubert, get out of my way,' she would say, feigning a charming
-petulance; or she would come and drag him out of his chair, saying, 'Come,
-Hubert, I can't allow you to lie there any longer; I have to go to South
-Water, and want you to come with me?'</p>
-
-<p>And walking together, they seemed like an Italian greyhound and a tall,
-shaggy setter.</p>
-
-<p>A cloud only appeared on Emily's face when Julia spoke of their
-departure. Julia had proposed that they should leave at the end of the
-month, and Emily had consented to this arrangement. The end of the month
-had appeared to her indefinitely distant, but three weeks of the subscribed
-time had passed, and signs of departure had become more numerous and more
-peremptory. Allusion had been made to the laundress, and Julia had asked
-Emily if she could get all her things into a single box; if not, they would
-have to send to Brighton for another. Emily had no notion of what her box
-would hold, and she showed little disposition to count her dresses or put
-her linen in order. <a name="150.png" class="pb"></a> She seemed entirely
-taken up thinking what books, what pictures, what china she could take
-away. She would like to have this bookcase, and might she not take the
-wardrobe from her own room? and she had known the clock all her life, and
-it did seem so hard to part with it.</p>
-
-<p>'My dear girl, all these things belong to Mr. Price; you really cannot
-take them away without asking him.'</p>
-
-<p>'But he won't refuse; he'll let me have anything I like.'</p>
-
-<p>'He can't very well refuse, so I think it would be nicer on your part
-not to ask for anything.'</p>
-
-<p>'I must have some of these things: I want to make the house we are going
-to live in, in London, look as much like Ashwood as possible.'</p>
-
-<p>'You'd like to take the whole house with you if you could.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; I think I should.' And Emily turned and looked vaguely up and down
-the passage. 'I wonder if he'd give me the picture of the windmill?'</p>
-
-<p>'The landing would look very bare without it.'</p>
-
-<p>'It would indeed, and when we came down here on a visit&mdash;for I suppose
-we shall come down here sometimes on visits&mdash;I should miss the picture
-dreadfully, so I don't think I'll ask him for it. But I must take <a
-name="151.png" class="pb"></a> some pictures away with me. There are a lot
-of old things in the lumber-room at the top of the house, that no one knows
-anything about. I think I'll ask him to let me have them. I'll take him for
-a good long ramble through the house. He hasn't seen any of it yet, except
-just the rooms we live in down-stairs.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily went straight to Hubert. He was lying in the long wicker chair,
-his straw hat drawn over his eyes, for the sun was finding its sharp, white
-way through the leaves of the beeches.</p>
-
-<p>'Now, Hubert, I want you. Are you asleep?'</p>
-
-<p>'Asleep! No, I was only thinking.' He threw his legs over the edge of
-the low chair and stood up.</p>
-
-<p>'If I tell you what I want, you won't refuse me, will you?'</p>
-
-<p>'No,' he said smilingly; 'I don't think I shall.'</p>
-
-<p>'Are you sure?' she said, looking at him enigmatically. Then in a
-lighter tone: 'I want you to give me a lot of things&mdash;oh, not a great many,
-nothing very valuable, but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'But what, Emily?... You can have anything you want.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, we shall see. You must come with me; I must show you what&mdash;I
-shan't want them unless you like to give them. Come along. Oh, you must
-come. <a name="152.png" class="pb"></a> I should not care about them unless
-you came with me, and let me point them out.' She passed her little hand
-into the arm of his rough coat, and led him towards the house. 'You know
-nothing of your own house, so before I go I intend to show you all over it.
-You have no idea what a funny old place it is up-stairs&mdash;endless old
-lumber-rooms which you would never think of going into if I didn't take
-you. When I was a little girl I wasn't often allowed down-stairs: the top
-of the house still seems to me more real than any other part.' Throwing
-open a door at the head of the stairs, she said: 'This used to be my
-nursery. It is all bare and deserted now, but I remember it quite
-different. I used to spend hours looking out of that window. From it you
-can see all over the park, and the park used to be my great delight. I used
-to sit there and make resolutions that next time I went out I would be
-braver, and explore the hollows full of bushes and tall ferns.'</p>
-
-<p>'Did you never break your resolutions?'</p>
-
-<p>'Sometimes. I was afraid of meeting fairies or elves. There are glades
-and hollows that used to seem very wonderful. And they still seem very
-wonderful, only not quite in the same way. Doesn't the world seem very
-wonderful to you? I'm always wondering at things. <a name="153.png"
-class="pb"></a> But I know I'm only a silly little girl, and yet I like to
-talk to you about my fancies. Down there in the beech wood there is a
-beautiful glade. I loved to play there better than anywhere else. I used to
-lie there on a fur rug and play at paper dolls. I always fancied myself a
-duchess or a princess.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are full of dreams, Emily.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; I suppose I am. Everything is pleasant and happy in dreams. I love
-dreaming. They thought I'd never learn to read; but it wasn't because I was
-stupid, but because I wouldn't study. I'd put my hands to my head, and,
-looking at the book, which I didn't see, I'd think of all sorts of things,
-imagine myself a fairy princess.'</p>
-
-<p>'And it was in this room that you dreamed all those dreams?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; in this dear old room. You see that picture: that is one of the
-things I intended to ask you to give me.'</p>
-
-<p>'What? That old, dilapidated print?'</p>
-
-<p>'You mustn't abuse my picture. I used to spend hours wondering if those
-horsemen galloping so madly through the wood were robbers, and if they had
-robbed the castle shown between the trees. I used to wonder if they would
-succeed in escaping. They wouldn't <a name="154.png" class="pb"></a> gallop
-their horses like that unless they were being pursued.... Can I have the
-picture?'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course you can. Is that&mdash;that is not all you are going to ask me
-for?'</p>
-
-<p>'I did think of asking you for a few more things. Do you mind?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, not the least. The more you ask for, the more I shall be
-pleased.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then you must come down-stairs.'</p>
-
-<p>They went down to the next landing. Emily stopped before a bed-room,
-and, looking at Hubert shyly and interrogatively, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'This is my room. I don't know if it is in a fit state to show you. I'm
-not a very tidy girl. I'll look first.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; it will do,' she said, drawing back. 'You can look in. I want you
-to give me that wardrobe. It isn't a very handsome one, but I've used it
-ever since I was a little girl; it has a hollow top, and I used to hide
-things there. Do you think you can spare it?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; I think I can,' he said, smiling.</p>
-
-<p>Then she led him up-stairs through the old lumber rooms, picking out
-here and there some generally broken and always worthless piece of
-furniture, pleading for it timidly, and strangely delighted when he <a
-name="155.png" class="pb"></a> nodded, granting her every request. She
-asked him to pull out what she had chosen from the <i>d&eacute;bris</i>, and a
-curious collection they made in the passage&mdash;dim and worm-eaten pictures,
-small book-cases, broken vases which she proposed mending.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert wiped the dust from his hands and coat-sleeves.</p>
-
-<p>'What a lot of things you have given me! Now we shall be able to get on
-nicely with our furnishing.'</p>
-
-<p>'What furnishing?'</p>
-
-<p>'The furnishing of the little house in London where Julia and I are
-going to live. You said you intended to add a hundred a year to the three
-hundred a year which Mr. Burnett should have left me; I don't see why you
-should do such a thing, but if you do we shall have four hundred a year to
-live upon. Julia says that we shall then be able to afford to give fifty
-pounds a year for a house. We can get a very nice little house, she says,
-for that&mdash;of course, in one of the suburbs. The great expense will be the
-furnishing; we are going to do it on the hire system. I daresay one can get
-very nice things in that way, but I do want to make the place look a little
-like Ashwood; that is why I'm asking you for these things. I was always
-fond of playing in these old lumber-rooms, and these dim old <a
-name="156.png" class="pb"></a> pictures, which I don't think any one knows
-anything of except myself, will remind me of Ashwood. They will look very
-well, indeed, hanging round our little dining-room. You are sure you don't
-want them, do you?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I won't want them. I'm only too pleased to be able to give them to
-you.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are very good, indeed you are. Look at these old haymakers; I never
-saw but one little corner of this picture before; it was stowed away behind
-a lot of lumber, and I hadn't the strength to pull it out.... I'm afraid
-you've got yourself rather dusty.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh no; it will brush off.'</p>
-
-<p>'I shall hang this picture over the fireplace; it will look very well
-there. I daresay you don't see anything in it, but I'd sooner have these
-pictures than those down-stairs. I love the picture of the windmill on the
-first landing&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Then why not have it? I'll have it taken down at once.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I could not think of taking it. How would the landing look without
-it? I should miss it dreadfully when I came here&mdash;for I daresay you will
-ask us to visit you occasionally, when you are lonely, won't you?'</p>
-
-<a name="157.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, whenever you like, I hope you will come here.'</p>
-
-<p>'And you will come and stay with us in London? Your room will be always
-ready; I'll look after that. We shall feel very offended, indeed, if you
-ever think of going to an hotel. Of course, you mustn't expect much; we
-shall only be able to keep one servant, but we shall try to make you
-comfortable, and, when you come, you'll take me to the theatres, to see one
-of your own plays.'</p>
-
-<p>'If my play's being played, certainly. But would it be right for me to
-pay you visits in London?'</p>
-
-<p>'They would be very wicked people indeed who saw anything wrong in it;
-you are my cousin. But why do you say such things? You destroy all my
-pleasure, and I was so happy just now.'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm afraid, Emily, your happiness hangs on a very slender thread.'</p>
-
-<p>She looked at him inquiringly, but feeling that it would be unwise to
-attempt an explanation, he said in a different tone&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'But, Emily, if you love Ashwood so well, why do you go away?'</p>
-
-<p>'Why do I go away? We have been here now some time.... I can't live here
-always.'</p>
-
-<a name="158.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Why not? Why not let things go on just as they are?'</p>
-
-<p>'And live here with you, I and Julia?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; why not?'</p>
-
-<p>'We should bore you; you want to write your plays, you'd get tired of
-me.'</p>
-
-<p>'Your being here would not prevent my writing my plays. I have been
-thinking all the while of asking you to remain, but was afraid you would
-not care to live here.'</p>
-
-<p>'Not care to live here! But you'll get tired of us; we might
-quarrel.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; we shall never quarrel. You will be doing me a great favour by
-remaining. Just fancy living alone in this great house, not a soul to speak
-to all day! I'm sure I should end by going out and hanging myself on one of
-those trees.'</p>
-
-<p>'You wouldn't do that, would you?'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert laughed. 'You and Mrs. Bentley will be doing me a great favour by
-remaining. If you go away I shall be robbed right and left, the gardens
-will go to rack and ruin, and when you come down here you won't know the
-place, and then, perhaps, we shall quarrel.'</p>
-
-<p>'I shouldn't like Ashwood to go to rack and ruin&mdash;<a name="159.png"
-class="pb"></a>and my poor flowers! And I'm sure you'd forget to feed the
-swans. If you did that, I could not forgive you.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, let these grave considerations decide you to remain.'</p>
-
-<p>'Are you really serious?'</p>
-
-<p>'I never was more serious in my life.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well then, may I run and tell Julia?'</p>
-
-<p>'Certainly, and I'll&mdash;no, I won't. I'll look up the housemaids and tell
-them to restore this interesting collection of antiquities to their
-original dust.'</p>
-
-<a name="160.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XII</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">He</span> was, perhaps, a little too conscious
-of his happiness; and he feared to do anything that would endanger the
-pleasure of his present life. It seemed to him like a costly thing which
-might slip from his hand or be broken; and day by day he appreciated more
-and more the delicate comfort of this well-ordered house&mdash;its brightness,
-its ample rooms, the charm of space within and without, the health of
-regular and wholesome meals, the presence of these two women, whose first
-desire was to minister to his least wish or caprice. These, the first
-spoilings he had received, combined to render him singularly happy.
-Bohemianism, he often thought, had been forced upon him&mdash;it was not natural
-to him, and though spiritual belief was dead, he experienced in church a
-resurrection of influences which misfortune had hypnotised, but which were
-stirring again into life. He was conscious again of this revival of his
-early life in the evenings when Mrs. Bentley went to the piano; and when
-playing a game of chess or <a name="161.png" class="pb"></a> draughts,
-remembrances of the old Shropshire rectory came back, sudden, distinct, and
-sweet. In these days the disease of fame and artistic achievement only sang
-monotonously, plaintively, like the wind in the valleys where the wind
-never wholly rests.</p>
-
-<p>Sometimes, when moved by the novel he was reading, he would discuss its
-merits and demerits with the two women who sat by him in the quiet of the
-dim drawing-room, their work on their knees, thinking of him. In the
-excitement of criticism his thoughts wandered to his own work, and the
-women's eyes filled with reveries, and their hands folded languidly over
-their knees. He spoke without emphasis, his words seeming to drop from the
-thick obsession of his dream. At ten the ladies gathered up their work,
-bade him good-night; and nightly these good-nights grew tenderer, and
-nightly they went up-stairs more deeply penetrated with a sense of their
-happiness. But at heart he was a man's man. He hardly perceived life from a
-woman's point of view; and in the long evenings which he spent with these
-women he sometimes had to force himself to appear interested in their
-conversation. He was as far removed from one as from the other. Emily's
-wilfulness puzzled him, and he did not seem to have anything further to
-talk about to Mrs. Bentley.</p>
-
-<a name="162.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>He missed the bachelor evenings of former days&mdash;the whisky and water,
-the pipes, and the literary discussion; and as the days went by he began to
-think of London; his thoughts turned affectionately towards the friends he
-had not seen for so long, and at the end of July he announced his intention
-of running up to town for a few days. So one morning breakfast was hurried
-through; Emily was sure there was plenty of time; Hubert looked at the
-clock and said he must be off; Julia ran after him with parcels which he
-had forgotten; farewell signs were waved; the dog-cart passed out of sight,
-and, after lingering a moment, the women returned to the drawing-room
-thoughtfully.</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder if he'll catch the train,' said Emily, without taking her face
-from the window.</p>
-
-<p>'I hope so; it will be very tiresome for him if he has to come back.
-There isn't another train before three o'clock.'</p>
-
-<p>'If he missed this train he wouldn't go until to-morrow morning.... I
-wonder how long he'll stay away. Supposing something happened, and he never
-came back!' Emily turned round and looked at Julia in dreamy
-wonderment.</p>
-
-<p>'Not come back at all? What nonsense you are <a name="163.png"
-class="pb"></a> talking, Emily! He won't be away more than a fortnight or
-three weeks.'</p>
-
-<p>'Three weeks! that seems a very long while. How shall we get through our
-evenings?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily had again turned towards the window. Julia did not trouble to
-reply. She smiled a little, as she paused on the threshold, for she
-remembered that no more than a few weeks ago Emily had addressed to her
-passionate speeches declaring her to be her only friend, and that they
-would like to live together, content in each other's companionship, always
-ignoring the rest of the world. Although she had not mistaken these
-speeches for anything more than the nervous passion of a moment, the
-suddenness of the recantation surprised her a little. Three or four days
-after, the girl was in a different mood, and when they came into the
-drawing-room after dinner she threw her arms about Julia's neck, saying,
-'Isn't this like old times? Here we are, living all alone together, and I'm
-not boring myself a bit. I never shall have another friend like you,
-Julia.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you'll be very glad when Hubert comes back.'</p>
-
-<p>'There's no harm in that, is there? I should be very ungrateful if I
-wasn't. Think how good he has been to us.... I'm afraid you don't like him,
-Julia.'</p>
-
-<a name="164.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Oh, yes, I do, Emily.'</p>
-
-<p>'Not so much as I do.' And raising herself&mdash;she was sitting on Julia's
-knees&mdash;Emily looked at Julia.</p>
-
-<p>'Perhaps not,' Julia replied, smiling; 'but then I never hated him as
-much as you did.'</p>
-
-<p>A cloud came over Emily's face. 'I did hate him, didn't I? You remember
-that first evening? You remember when you came up-stairs and found me
-trembling in the passage&mdash;I was afraid to go to bed. ... I begged you to
-allow me to sleep with you. You remember how we listened for his footstep
-in the passage, as he went up to bed, and how I clung to you? Then the
-dreams of that night. I never told you what my dreams were, but you
-remember how I woke up with a cry, and you asked me what was the
-matter?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, I remember.'</p>
-
-<p>'I dreamt I was with him in a garden, and was trying to get away; but he
-held me by a single hair, and the hair would not break. How absurd dreams
-are! And the garden was full of flowers, but every time I tried to gather
-them, he pulled me back by that single hair. I don't remember any more,
-only something about running wildly away from him, and losing myself in a
-dark forest, and there the ground <a name="165.png" class="pb"></a> was
-soft like a bog, and it seemed as if I were going to be swallowed up every
-moment. It was a terrible sensation. All of a sudden I woke with a cry. The
-room was grey with dawn, and you said: "Emily dear, what have you been
-dreaming, to cry out like that?" I was too tired and frightened to tell you
-much about my dream, and next morning I had forgotten it. I did not
-remember it for a long time after, but all the same some of it came true.
-Don't you remember how I met Hubert next morning on the lawn? We went into
-the garden and spent the best part of the morning walking about the
-lake.... I don't know if I told you&mdash;I ran away when I heard him coming,
-and should have got away had it not been for this tiresome dog. He called
-after me, using my Christian name. I was so angry I think I hated him then
-more than ever. We walked a little way, and the next thing I remember was
-thinking how nice he was. I don't know how it all happened. Now I think of
-it, it seems like magic. It was the day that my old donkey ran away with
-the mowing machine and broke the flower-vase, the dear old thing; we had a
-long talk about "Jack." And then I took Hubert into the garden and showed
-him the flowers. I don't think he cares much about flowers; he pretended,
-<a name="166.png" class="pb"></a> but I could see it was only to please me.
-Then I knew that he liked me, for when I told him I was going to feed the
-swans, he said he loved swans and begged to be allowed to come too. I don't
-think a man would say that if he didn't like you, do you?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily's mind seemed to contain nothing but memories of Hubert. What he
-had said on this occasion, how he had looked at her on another. The
-conversation paused and Emily sunned herself in the enchantment of
-recollection, until at last breaking forth again, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Have you noticed how Ethel Eastwick goes after him? And the odd part of
-it is, that she can't see that he dislikes her. He thinks nothing of her
-singing; he remained talking to me in the conservatory the whole time. I
-asked him to come into the drawing-room, but he pretended to misunderstand
-me, and asked me if I felt a draught. He said, "Let me get you a shawl." I
-said, "I assure you, Hubert, I don't feel any draught." But he would not
-believe me, and said he could not allow me to sit there without something
-on my shoulders. I begged of him not to move, for I knew that Ethel would
-never forgive me if I interrupted her singing; but he said <a
-name="167.png" class="pb"></a> he could get me a wrap without interrupting
-any one. He opened the conservatory door, ran across the lawn round to the
-front door, and came back with&mdash;what do you think? With two wraps instead
-of one; one was mine, and the other belonged to&mdash;I don't know who it
-belonged to. So I said, "Oh, what ever shall we do? I cannot let you go
-back again. If any one was to come in and find me alone, what ever would
-they think!" Hubert said, "Will you come with me? A walk in the garden will
-be pleasanter than sitting in the conservatory." I didn't like going at
-first, but I thought there couldn't be much harm.'</p>
-
-<p>It seemed to Emily very terrible and very wonderful, and she experienced
-throughout her numbed sense a strange, thrilling pain, akin to joy, and she
-sat, her little fragile form lost in the arm-chair, her great eyes fixed in
-ecstasy, seeing still the dark garden with the great star risen like a
-phantom above the trees. That evening had been to her a wonder and an
-enchantment, and her pausing thoughts dwelt on the moment when the distant
-sound of a bell reached their ears, and the bell came nearer, clanging
-fiercely in the sonorous garden. Then they saw a light&mdash;some one had come
-for them with a lantern&mdash;a joke, a suitable pleasantry, and amid joyous
-laughter, watching the setting moon, <a name="168.png" class="pb"></a> they
-had gone back to the tiled house, where dancers still passed the
-white-curtained windows. Hubert had sat by her at supper, serving her with
-meat and drink. In the sway of memory she trembled and started, looking in
-the great arm-chair like a little bird that the moon keeps awake in its
-soft nest. She no longer wished to tell Julia of that night in the garden;
-her sensation of it lay far beyond words; it was her secret, and it shone
-through her dreamy youth even as the star had shone through the heavens
-that night. Suddenly she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder what Hubert is doing in London? I wonder where he is now?'</p>
-
-<p>'Now? It is just nine. I suppose he's in some theatre.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose he goes a great deal to the theatre. I wonder who he goes
-with. He has lots of friends in London&mdash;actresses, I suppose; he knows them
-who play in his plays. He dines at his club&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Or at a restaurant.'</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder what a restaurant is like; ladies dine at restaurants, don't
-they?'</p>
-
-<p>As Julia was about to make reply, the servant brought her a letter. She
-opened the envelope, and took out a long, closely-written letter; she
-turned it <a name="169.png" class="pb"></a> over to see the signature, and
-then looking toward Emily, she said, with a pleasant smile&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Now I shall be able to answer your questions better; this letter is
-from Mr. Price.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, what does he say? Read it.'</p>
-
-<p>'Wait a moment, let me glance through it first; it is very difficult to
-read.' A few moments after, Julia said, 'There's not much that would
-interest you in the letter, Emily; it is all about his play. He says he
-would have written before if he had not been so busy looking out for a
-theatre, and engaging actors and actresses. He hopes to start rehearsing
-next week.</p>
-
-<blockquote>
-
-<p>"I say I hope, because there are still some parts of the play which do
-not satisfy me, particularly the third act. I intend to work steadily on
-the play till, next Thursday, five or six hours every day; I am in perfect
-health and spirits, and ought to be able to get the thing right. Should I
-fail to satisfy myself, or should any further faults appear when we begin
-to rehearse the piece, I shall dismiss my people, pack up my traps, and
-return to Ashwood. There I shall have quiet; here, people are continually
-knocking at my door, and I cannot deny my friends the pleasure of seeing
-me, if that is a pleasure. But at Ashwood, as I say, I shall be sure of
-quiet, and can easily finish the play this autumn, and February is a better
-time than September to produce a play."'</p> </blockquote>
-
-<a name="170.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Then he goes on,' said Julia, 'to explain the alterations he
-contemplates making. There's no use reading you all that.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose you think I should not understand.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, if you want to read the letter, there it is.'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't want to see your letter.'</p>
-
-<p>'What do you mean, Emily?'</p>
-
-<p>'Nothing, only I think it rather strange that he didn't write to
-me.'</p>
-
-<p>Some days after, Emily took up the book that Julia had laid down.
-'"Shakespeare's Plays." I suppose you are reading them so that you'll be
-able to talk to him better.'</p>
-
-<p>'I never thought of such a thing, Emily.' At the end of a long silence
-Emily said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Do you think clever men like clever women?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't know. Some say they do, some say they don't. I believe that
-really clever men, men of genius, don't.'</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder if Hubert is a man of genius. What do you think?'</p>
-
-<p>'I really am not capable of expressing an opinion on the matter.'</p>
-
-<p>Another week passed away, and Emily began to <a name="171.png"
-class="pb"></a> assume an air of languor and timid yearning. One day she
-said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder he doesn't write. He hasn't answered my letter yet. Has he
-answered yours?'</p>
-
-<p>'He has not written to me again. He hasn't time for letter-writing. He
-is working night and day at his play.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose he'd never think of coming down by the morning train. He'd be
-sure to come by the five o'clock.'</p>
-
-<p>'He won't come without writing. He'd be sure to write for the
-dog-cart.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose so. There's no use in looking out for him.'</p>
-
-<p>But, notwithstanding her certitude on the point, Emily could not help
-choosing five o'clock as the time for a walk, and Julia noticed that the
-girl's feet seemed to turn instinctively towards the lodge. Often she would
-leave the flowers she was tending on the terrace, and stand looking through
-the dim, sun-smitten landscape toward the red-brown spot, which was
-Southwater, in the middle of the long plain.</p>
-
-<a name="172.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XIII</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Hubert</span> felt called upon to entertain his
-friends, and one evening they all sat dining at Hurlingham in the long
-room. The conversation, as usual, had been about books and pictures.</p>
-
-<p>It was the moment when strings of lanterns were hoisted from tree to
-tree. In front of a large space of sky the coloured globes were crude and
-trivial; but in the shadows of the trees by the river, where the mist rose
-into the branches, they had begun to awaken the first impression of
-melancholy and the sadness of <i>f&ecirc;te</i>. It was the moment when the
-great trees hung heavy and motionless, strangely green and solemn beneath a
-slate-coloured sky; and the plaintive waltz cried on Hungarian
-fiddle-strings, till it seemed the soul of this feminine evening. The
-fashionable crowd had moved out upon the lawn; the white dresses were
-phantom blue, and the men's coats faded into obscure masses, darkening the
-gathering shadows. It was the moment when voices soften, and every heart,
-overpowered with <a name="173.png" class="pb"></a> yearning, is impelled to
-tell of grief and disillusion; and every moment the wail of the fiddles
-grew more unbearable, tearing the heart to its very depths.</p>
-
-<p>Author and actor-manager walked up the lawn puffing at their cigars. The
-others sat watching, knowing that the opportunity had come for criticism of
-their friend.</p>
-
-<p>'He does not change much,' said Harding. 'Circumstances haven't affected
-him. A year ago he lived in a garret re-writing his play <i>Divorce</i>. He
-now rewrites <i>Divorce</i> in a handsome house in Sussex.'</p>
-
-<p>'I thought he had finished his play,' said Thompson. 'I heard that he
-was going to take a theatre and produce it himself.'</p>
-
-<p>'But did you not hear him say at dinner that he was re-writing as he
-rehearsed? I met one of the actors yesterday. He doesn't know what to make
-of it. He gets a new part every week to learn.'</p>
-
-<p>'Do you think he'll ever produce it?'</p>
-
-<p>'I doubt it. At the last moment he'll find that the third act doesn't
-satisfy him, and will postpone the production till the spring.'</p>
-
-<p>'What do you think of his work?'</p>
-
-<p>'Very intelligent, but a little insipid&mdash;like himself. Look at him.
-<i>Il est bien l'homme de ses ouvres</i>. There is something dry about him,
-and his writings are <a name="174.png" class="pb"></a> like himself&mdash;hard,
-dry and wanting in personal passion.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yet he talks charmingly, with vivacity and intelligence, and he is so
-full of appreciation of Shakespeare, Goethe, and such genuine love for
-antiquity.'</p>
-
-<p>'I've heard him talk Shakespeare, Goethe, and Ibsen,' said Harding, 'but
-I never heard him say anything new, anything personal. It seems to me that
-you mistake quotation for perception. He assimilates, but he originates
-nothing. He has read a great deal; he is covered with literature like a
-rock with moss and lichen. He's appreciative, I will say that for him. He
-would make a capital editor, or a tutor, or a don, an Oxford don. He would
-be perfectly happy as a don; he could read up the German critics and
-expound Sophocles. He would be perfectly happy as a don. As it is, he is
-perfectly miserable.'</p>
-
-<p>'There was a fellow who had a studio over mine,' said Thompson. 'He had
-been in the army and used to paint a bit. The academy by chance hung a
-portrait, so he left the army and turned portrait-painter. One day he saw a
-picture by Velasquez, and he understood how horrid were the red things he
-used to send to the academy. He used to come down to see me; he used to
-say, "I wish I had never seen a picture, by <a name="175.png"
-class="pb"></a> Gad, it is driving me out of my mind." Poor chap, I wanted
-him to go back to the army. I said, Why paint? no one forces you to; it
-makes you miserable; don't do so any more. When you have anything to say,
-art is a joy; when you haven't, it is a curse to yourself and to
-others.'</p>
-
-<p>Philipps, the editor of <i>The Cosmopolitan</i>, turned towards Harding,
-and he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I cannot follow you in your estimate of Hubert Price. I don't see him
-either mentally or physically as you do. It seems to me that you distort
-the facts to make them fit in with your theory. He is tall and thin, but I
-do not think that his nature is hard and dry. I should, on the contrary,
-say that he was of a soft rather than a hard nature. The expression of his
-face is mild and melancholy. I do not detect the dry, hard, rocky basis of
-which you speak. I should say that Price was a sentimental man.'</p>
-
-<p>'I have never heard of him being in love,' said Harding. 'I should say
-that he had been entirely uninfluenced by women.'</p>
-
-<p>'But love of women is only one form of sentimentality and not the
-highest, nor the deepest,' said Philipps. 'I can imagine a man being
-exceedingly sentimental and not caring about women at all.'</p>
-
-<a name="176.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'What you say is true,' said Harding. His face showed that he felt the
-observation to be true and was interested in it. 'But I think I described
-him truly when I said he was like a rock overgrown with moss and lichen.
-There is not sufficient root-hold for any idea to grow in him, it withers
-and dies. Examine his literature, and you'll see it is as I say. He has
-written some remarkable plays, I don't say he hasn't. But they seem to be
-better than they are. He gets a picturesque situation, but there is always
-something mechanical about it. There's a human emotion somewhere, but it's
-never really there; it might have been, but it is not.... It is very well
-done, it is very intelligent; but it does not seem to live, to
-palpitate.... In like manner there are men who have read everything, who
-understand everything, who can theorise; they can tell you all about the
-masterpiece, but when it comes to producing one, well, they're not on in
-that scene.'</p>
-
-<p>'What an excellent character he would make in a novel! A drama of
-sterility,' said Phillips.</p>
-
-<p>'Or the dramas which they bring about,' said Harding.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, or the dramas they bring about. But what drama can Price bring
-about&mdash;he shuts himself up in a <a name="177.png" class="pb"></a> room and
-tries to write a play,' said Phillips. 'I don't see how he can dramatise
-any life but his own.'</p>
-
-<p>'All deviations from the normal tend to bring about drama,' said
-Harding.</p>
-
-<p>'Then, why don't you do a Hubert Price in a book? It would be most
-interesting. Do you think you ever will?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't think so.'</p>
-
-<p>'Why not? Because he is a friend of yours, and you would not
-like&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I never allow my private life to interfere with my literature. No; for
-quite other reasons. I admit that he represents physically and mentally a
-great deal of the intellectual impotence current in our time. But it would
-be difficult, I think, to bring vividly before the reader that tall, thin,
-blonde man, with his pale gentle eyes and his insipid mind. I should take
-quite a different kind of man as my model.'</p>
-
-<p>'What kind of man?' said Phillips, and the five or six writers and
-painters leaned forward to listen to Harding.</p>
-
-<p>'I think I should imagine a man about the medium height. A nice figure,
-light, trim, neat. Good-looking, straight nose, eyes bright and
-intelligent. I think he would have beard, a very close-cut beard. The <a
-name="178.png" class="pb"></a> turn of his mind would be metaphysical and
-poetic&mdash;an intense subtility of mind combined with much order. He would be
-full of little habits. He would have note-books of a special kind in which
-to enter his ideas. The tendency of his mind would be towards concision,
-and he would by degrees extend his desire for concision into the twilight
-and the night of symbolism.'</p>
-
-<p>'A sort of constipated Browning,' said Phillips.</p>
-
-<p>'Exactly,' said Harding.</p>
-
-<p>'And would you have him married?' asked John Norton.</p>
-
-<p>'Certainly. I imagine him living in a tiny little house somewhere near
-the river&mdash;Westminster or Chelsea. His wife would be a dreadful person,
-thin, withered, herring-gutted&mdash;a sort of red herring with a cap. But his
-daughter would be charming, she would have inherited her father's features.
-I can imagine these women living in admiration of this man, tending on him,
-speaking very little, removed from worldly influences, seeing only the
-young men who come every Tuesday evening to listen to the poet's
-conversation&mdash;I don't hear them saying much&mdash;I can see them sitting in a
-corner listening for the ten thousandth time to aestheticisms not one word
-of which they understand, and about ten o'clock stealing away to some
-mysterious <a name="179.png" class="pb"></a> chamber. Something of the
-poet's sterility would have descended upon them.'</p>
-
-<p>'That is how you imagine <i>un g&eacute;nie rat&eacute;</i>,' said Phillips. 'Your
-conception is clear enough; why don't you write the book?'</p>
-
-<p>'Because there is nothing more to say on the subject. It is a subject
-for a sketch, not for a book. But of this I'm sure, that the dry-rock man
-would come out more clearly in a book than the soft, insipid, gentle,
-companionable, red-bearded fellow.'</p>
-
-<p>'If Price were the dry, sterile nature you describe, we should feel no
-interest in him, we should not be discussing him as we are,' said
-Phillips.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, we should&mdash;Price suffers; we're interested in him because he
-suffers&mdash;because he suffers in public&mdash;"I never was happy except on those
-rare occasions when I thought I was a great man." In that sentence you'll
-find the clew to his attractiveness. But in him there is nothing of the
-irresponsible passion which is genius. There's that little Rose
-Massey&mdash;that little baby who spends half her day dreaming, and who is as
-ignorant as a cod-fish. Well, she has got that something&mdash;that undefinable
-but always recognisable something. It was Price who discovered her. We used
-to laugh at him when he said she had genius. He was right; <a
-name="180.png" class="pb"></a> we were wrong. The other night I was
-standing in the wings; she was coming down from her dressing-room&mdash;she
-lingered on the stairs, looking the most insignificant little thing you can
-well imagine; but the moment her cue came a strange light came into her
-eyes and a strange life was fused in her limbs; she was transformed, and
-went on the stage a very symbol of passion and romance.'</p>
-
-<p>The slate colour of the sky did not seem to change, and yet the night
-grew visibly denser in the park; and there had come the sensation of things
-ended, a movement of wraps thrown over shoulders and thought of bedtime and
-home. The crowd was moving away, and nearly lost in the darkness Hubert
-came towards his friends. He had just knocked the ash from his cigar, and
-as he drew in the smoke the glow of the lighted end fled over his blonde
-face.</p>
-
-<a name="181.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XIV</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">One</span> day a short letter came from Hubert,
-asking Mrs. Bentley to send the dog-cart to the station to fetch him. He
-had decided to come home at once, and postpone the production of his play
-till the coming spring.</p>
-
-<p>Every rehearsal had revealed new and serious faults of construction.
-These he had attempted to remove when he went home in the evening, but
-though he often worked till daybreak, he did not achieve much. The very
-knowledge that he must come to rehearsal with the re-written scene seemed
-to produce in him a sort of mental paralysis, and, striking the table with
-his fist, he would get up, and a thought would cross his mind of how he
-might escape from this torture. After one terrible night, in which he
-feared his brain was really giving way, he went down to the theatre and
-dismissed the company, for he had resolved to return to Ashwood and spend
-another autumn and another winter re-writing <i>The Gipsy</i>. If it did
-not come right then, <a name="182.png" class="pb"></a> he would bother no
-more about it. Why should he? There was so much else in life besides
-literature. He had plenty of money, and was determined in any case to enjoy
-himself. So did his thoughts run as he leaned back on the cushions of a
-first-class carriage, glancing casually through the evening paper.
-Presently his eye was caught by a paragraph narrating an odd calamity which
-had overtaken a scene carpenter, an honest, respectable, sober,
-hard-working man, who had fulfilled all social obligations as perfectly as
-the most exacting could desire, until the day he had conceived the idea of
-a machine for the better exhibition of advertisements on the hoardings. His
-system was based on the roller-towel. The roller was moved by clockwork,
-and the advertisements went round like the towel. At first he spent his
-spare time and his spare money upon it, but as the hobby took possession of
-him, he devoted all his time and all his money to it; then he pawned his
-clothes, and then he raised money on the furniture; the brokers came in,
-and finally the poor fellow was taken to a lunatic asylum, and his wife and
-family were thrown on the parish. The story impressed Hubert strangely. He
-saw an analogy between himself and the crazy inventor, and he asked himself
-if he would go on re-writing <i>The Gipsy</i> until <a name="183.png"
-class="pb"></a> he went out of his mind. 'Even if I do,' he thought, 'I can
-hurt no one but myself. No one else is dependent on me; my hobby can hurt
-no one but myself.' These forebodings passed away, and his mind filled up
-with schemes of work. He knew exactly what he wanted to do, and he looked
-forward to doing it. He wanted quiet, he wanted long days alone with
-himself. Such were his thoughts in the dog-cart as he drove home, and it
-was therefore vaguely unpleasant to him to meet the two ladies waiting for
-him at the lodge gate. Their smiles of welcome irritated him; he longed for
-the solitude of his study, the companionship of his work; and instead he
-had to sit with them in the drawing-room, and tell them how he liked
-London, what he had done there, whom he had seen there, and why he had been
-unable to finish his play to his satisfaction.</p>
-
-<p>In the morning Emily or Mrs. Bentley was generally about to pour out his
-coffee for him and keep him company. One day Hubert noticed that it was no
-longer Mrs. Bentley but Emily who met him in the passage, and followed him
-into the dining-room. And while he was eating she sat with her feet on the
-fender, talking of some girls in the neighbourhood&mdash;their jealousies, and
-how Edith Eastwick could not think of <a name="184.png" class="pb"></a>
-anything for herself, but always copied her dresses. Dandy drowsed at her
-feet, and very often she would take him to the window and make him go
-through all his tricks, calling on Hubert to admire him.</p>
-
-<p>She had a knack of monopolising Hubert, and since his return from
-London, her desire to do so had become almost a determination. Hubert
-showed no disinclination, and after breakfast they were to be seen together
-in the gardens. Hubert was a great catch, and there were other young ladies
-eager to be agreeable to him; but he did not seem to desire flirtation with
-any. So they came to speak of him as a very clever man, no doubt; but as
-they knew nothing about plays, he very probably did not care to talk to
-them. Hubert was not attractive in general society, and he would soon have
-failed to interest them at all had it not been for Emily. She was proud of
-her influence over him, and for the first time showed a desire to go into
-society. Day by day her conversation turned more and more on
-tennis-parties, and she even spoke about a ball. He consented to take her;
-and he had to dance with her, and she refused nearly every one, saying she
-was tired, leading Hubert away for long conversations in the galleries and
-on the staircases. Hubert had positively nothing to say to her; but she
-seemed quite happy as <a name="185.png" class="pb"></a> long as she was
-with him. And as they drove through the dawn Emily chattered of a hundred
-trifles,&mdash;what Edith had said, what Mabel wore, of the possibility of a
-marriage, and the arrival of a detachment of some cavalry regiment. Hubert
-found it hard to affect interest in these conversations. His brain was
-weary with waltz tunes, the shape of shoulders, and the glare and rustle of
-silk; but as she chattered, rubbing the misted windows from time to time,
-so as to determine how far they were from home, he wondered if he should
-ever marry, and half playfully he thought of her as his wife.</p>
-
-<p>But without warning his dreams were broken by a sudden thought, and he
-said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Another time, I think it will be better, my dear Emily, that Mrs.
-Bentley should take you out.'</p>
-
-<p>'Why should you not take me out?... I suppose you don't care to&mdash;I bore
-you.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; on the contrary, I enjoy it&mdash;I like to see you amused; but I think
-you should have a proper chaperon.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not answer; and a little cloud came over her face. Hubert
-thought she looked even prettier in her displeasure than she had done in
-her joy; and he went to sleep thinking of her. Never had he thought her so
-beautiful&mdash;never had she touched him with so <a name="186.png"
-class="pb"></a> personal an interest; and next morning, when he lounged in
-his study, he was glad to hear her knock at the door; and the half-hour he
-spent with her there, yielding to her pleading to come for a walk with her,
-or drive her over to Southwater in the dog-cart, was one of unalloyed
-pleasure. But a few days after, as he lay in bed, a new idea came to him
-for his third act. So he said he would have breakfast in his study. He
-dressed, thinking the whole time how he could round off his idea and bring
-it into the act. So clear and precise did it seem in his mind that he sat
-down immediately after breakfast, forgetting even his matutinal cigar, and
-wrote with a flowing pen. He had left orders that he was not to be
-disturbed; and was annoyed when the door opened and Emily entered.</p>
-
-<p>'I am very sorry, but you must not be cross with me; I do so want you to
-come and see the Eastwicks with me.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I could not think of such a thing this morning. I am
-very busy&mdash;indeed I am.'</p>
-
-<p>'What are you doing? Nothing very important, I can see. You are only
-writing your play. You might come with me.'</p>
-
-<p>'My play is as important to me as a visit to the Eastwicks is to you,'
-he answered, smiling.</p>
-
-<a name="187.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I have promised Edith.... I really do wish you would come.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, it is quite impossible: do let me get on with my
-work!'</p>
-
-<p>Emily's face instantly changed expression; she turned to leave the room,
-and Hubert had to go after her and beg her to forgive him&mdash;he really had
-not meant to be rude to her.</p>
-
-<p>'You don't care to talk to me. I am not clever enough for you.'</p>
-
-<p>Then pity took him, and he made amends by suggesting they should go for
-a walk in the park, and she often succeeded in leading him even to dry,
-uninteresting neighbours. But the burden grew heavier, and soon he could
-endure no longer the evenings of devotion to her in the drawing-room, where
-the presence of Mrs. Bentley seemed to fill her with incipient rebellion.
-One evening after dinner, as he was about to escape up-stairs, Emily took
-his arm, pleading that he should play at least one game of backgammon with
-her. He played three; and then, thinking he had done enough, he took up a
-novel and began to read. Emily was bitterly offended. She sat in a corner,
-a picture of deep misery; and whenever he spoke to Mrs. Bentley, he thought
-she would burst into tears. <a name="188.png" class="pb"></a> It was
-exasperating to be the perpetual victim of such folly; and, pressed by the
-desire to talk to Mrs. Bentley about the book he was reading, he suggested
-that she should come with him to the meet. The Harriers met for the first
-time that season at not five miles from Ashwood. Mrs. Bentley pleaded an
-engagement. She had promised to go over to tea at the rectory.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, we shall be back in plenty of time; I'll leave you at the rectory
-on our way home.'</p>
-
-<p>'Thank you, Mr. Price; but I do not think I can go.'</p>
-
-<p>'And why, may I ask?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, perhaps Emily would like to go.'</p>
-
-<p>'Emily has a cold, and it would be folly of her to venture a long drive
-on a cold morning.'</p>
-
-<p>'My cold is quite well.'</p>
-
-<p>'You were complaining before dinner how bad it was.'</p>
-
-<p>'If you don't want to take me, say so.' Tears were now streaming down
-her cheeks.</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I am only too pleased to have you with me; I was only
-thinking of your cold.'</p>
-
-<p>'My cold is quite gone,' she said, with brightening face; and next
-morning she came down with her waterproof on her arm, and she had on a new
-cloth dress which she had just received from London. <a name="189.png"
-class="pb"></a> Hubert recognised in each article of attire a sign that she
-was determined to carry her point. It seemed cruel to tell her to take her
-things off, and he glanced at Mrs. Bentley and wondered if she were
-offended.</p>
-
-<p>'I hope the drive won't tire you; you know the meet is at least five
-miles from here.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not answer. She looked charming with her great boa tied about
-her throat, and sprang into the dog-cart all lightness and joy.</p>
-
-<p>'I hope you are well wrapped up about the knees,' said Mrs. Bentley.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, thank you; Hubert is looking after me.'</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Bentley's calm, statuesque face, whereon no trace of envy appeared,
-caught Hubert's attention as he gathered up the reins, and he thought how
-her altruism contrasted with the passionate egotism of the young girl.</p>
-
-<p>'I hope Julia was not disappointed. I know she wanted to come;
-but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'But what?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, no one likes Julia more than I do, and I don't want to say
-anything against her; but, having lived so long with her, I see her faults
-better than you can. She is horribly selfish! It never occurs to her to
-think of me.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert did not answer, and Emily looked at him <a name="190.png"
-class="pb"></a> inquiringly. At last she said, 'I suppose you don't think
-so?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, Emily, since you ask me, I must say that I think she took it very
-good-humouredly. You said you were ill, and it was all arranged that I
-should drive her to the meet; then you suddenly interposed, and said you
-wanted to go; and the moment you mentioned your desire to go, she gave way
-without a word. I really don't know what more you want.'</p>
-
-<p>'You don't know Julia. You cannot read her face. She never forgets
-anything, and is storing it up, and will pay me out for it sooner or
-later.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, how can you say such things? I never heard&mdash;&mdash; She is
-always ready to sacrifice herself for you.'</p>
-
-<p>'You think so. She has a knack of pretending to be more unselfish than
-another; but she is in reality intensely selfish.'</p>
-
-<p>'All I can say is that it does not strike me so. I never saw any one
-give way more good-humouredly than she did to-day.'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't think that that is so wonderful, after all. She is only a paid
-companion; and I do not see why she should go driving about the country
-with you, and I be left at home.'</p>
-
-<a name="191.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Hubert was somewhat shocked. The conversation paused.</p>
-
-<p>'She gets on very well with men,' Emily said at last, breaking an
-irritating silence somewhat suddenly. 'They say she is very good-looking.
-Don't you think so?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, she is certainly a pretty woman&mdash;or, I should say, a
-good-looking woman. She is too tall to be what one generally understands as
-a pretty woman.'</p>
-
-<p>'Do you like tall women?'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment the hunt appeared in the field at the bottom of the hill.
-A grey horse had just got rid of his rider, and after galloping round and
-round, his head in the air, stopped and began to graze. The others jumped
-the hedge, and the greater part of the field got over the brook in capital
-style. Emily and Hubert watched them with delighted eyes, for the sight was
-indeed picturesque this fine autumn day. Even their horse pricked up his
-ears and began neighing, and Hubert had to hold him tight in hand, lest he
-should break away while they were enjoying the spectacle. At that moment a
-poor little animal, with fear-haunted eyes, and in all the agony of
-fatigue, appeared above the crest of the hill, and immediately after came
-the <a name="192.png" class="pb"></a> straining hounds, one within a dozen
-yards of the poor little beast, now running in a circle, uttering the most
-plaintive and pitiful cries.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, they are not going to kill it!' cried Emily. 'Oh, save it, save it,
-Hubert!' She hid her face in her hands. 'Did it escape? is it killed?' she
-said, looking round. 'Oh, it is too cruel!' The huntsman was calling to the
-hounds, holding something above them, and at every moment horses' heads
-appeared over the brow of the hill.</p>
-
-<p>There was more hunting; and when the October night began to gather, and
-the lurid sunset flared up in the west, Hubert got out another wrap, and
-placed it about Emily's shoulders. But although the chill night had drawn
-them close together in the dog-cart, they were as widely separated as if
-oceans were between them. So far as lay in his power he had hidden the
-annoyance that the intrusion of her society had occasioned him; and, to
-deceive her, very little concealment was necessary. So long as she saw him
-she seemed to live in a dream, unconscious of every other thought.</p>
-
-<p>They rolled through a gradual effacement of things, seeing the lights of
-the farmhouses in the long plain start into existence, and then remain
-fixed, like gold <a name="193.png" class="pb"></a> beetles pinned on a blue
-curtain. The chill evening drew her to him, till they seemed one; and full
-of the intimate happiness of the senses which comes of a long day spent in
-the open air, she chattered of indifferent things. He thought how pleasant
-the drive would be were he with Mrs. Bentley&mdash;or, for the matter of that,
-with any one with whom he could talk about the novel that had interested
-him. They rolled along the smooth wide road, watching the streak of light
-growing narrower in a veil of light grey cloud drawn athwart the sky.
-Overpowered by her love, the girl hardly noticed his silence; and when they
-passed through the night of an overhanging wood her flesh thrilled, and a
-little faintness came over her; for the leaves that brushed her face had
-seemed like a kiss from her lover.</p>
-
-<a name="194.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XV</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">One</span> afternoon, about the end of
-September, Hubert came down from his study about tea-time, and announced
-that he had written the last scene of his last act. Emily was alone in the
-drawing-room.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, how glad I am! Then it is done at last. Why not write at once and
-engage the theatre? When shall we go to London?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, I don't mean that the play could be put into rehearsal to-morrow.
-It still requires a good deal of overhauling. Besides, even if it were
-completely finished, I should not care to produce it at once. I should like
-to lay it aside for a couple of months, and see how it read then.'</p>
-
-<p>'What a lot of trouble you do take! Does every one who writes plays take
-so much trouble?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, I'm afraid they do not, nor is it necessary they should. Their
-plays are merely incidents strung together more or less loosely; whereas my
-play is the development of a temperament, of temperamental <a
-name="195.png" class="pb"></a> characteristics which cannot be altered,
-having been inherited through centuries; it must therefore pursue its
-course to a fatal conclusion. In Shakespeare&mdash;&mdash; But no, no! these things
-have no interest for you. You shall have the nicest dress that money can
-buy; and if the play succeeds&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>The girl raised her pathetic eyes. In truth, she cared not at all what
-he talked to her about; she was occupied with her own thoughts of him, and
-just to sit in the room with him, and to look at him occasionally, was
-sufficient. But for once his words had pained her. It was because she could
-not understand that he did not care to talk to her. Why did she not
-understand? It was hard for a little girl like her to understand such
-things as he spoke about; but she would understand; and then her thoughts
-passed into words, and she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I understand quite as well as Julia. She, knows the names of more books
-than I, and she is very clever at pretending that she knows more than she
-does.'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment Mrs. Bentley entered. She saw that Emily was enjoying her
-talk with her cousin, and tried to withdraw. But Hubert told her that he
-had written the last act; she pretended to be looking for a <a
-name="196.png" class="pb"></a> book, and then for some work which she said
-had dropped out of her basket.</p>
-
-<p>'If Emily would only continue the talking,' she thought, 'I should be
-able to get away.' But Emily said not a word. She sat as if frozen in her
-chair; and at length Mrs. Bentley was obliged to enter, however cursorily,
-into the conversation.</p>
-
-<p>'If you have written out <i>The Gipsy</i> from end to end, I should
-advise you to produce it without further delay. Once it is put on the
-stage, you will be able to see better where it is wrong.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then it will be too late. The critics will have expressed their
-opinion; the work will be judged. There are only one or two points about
-which I am doubtful. I wish Harding were here. I cannot work unless I have
-some one to talk to about my work. I don't mean to say that I take advice;
-but the very fact of reading an act to a sympathetic listener helps me. I
-wrote the first act of <i>Divorce</i> in that way. It was all wrong. I had
-some vague ideas about how it might be mended. A friend came in; I told him
-my difficulties; in telling them they vanished, and I wrote an entirely new
-act that very night.'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm sorry,' said Mrs. Bentley, 'that I am not Mr. Harding. It must be
-very gratifying to one's feelings <a name="197.png" class="pb"></a> to be
-able to help to solve a literary difficulty, particularly if one cannot
-write oneself.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you can&mdash;I'm sure you can. I remember asking your advice once
-before; it was excellent, and was of immense help to me. Are you sure it
-will not bore you? I shall be so much obliged if you will.'</p>
-
-<p>'Bore me! No, it won't bore me,' said Mrs. Bentley. 'I'm sure I feel
-very much flattered.' The colour mounted to her cheek, a smile was on her
-lips; but it went out at the sight of Emily's face.</p>
-
-<p>'Then come up to my study. We shall have just time to get through the
-first act before dinner.'</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Bentley hesitated; and, noticing her hesitation, Hubert looked
-surprised. At that moment Emily said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'May I not come too?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, I don't know, Emily. You see that we wish to see if there is
-anything in the play that a young girl should not hear.'</p>
-
-<p>'Always an excuse to get rid of me. You want to be alone. I never come
-into the room that you do not stop speaking. Oh, I can bear it no
-longer!'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily!'</p>
-
-<p>'Don't touch me! Go to her; shut yourself up together. Don't think of
-me. I can bear it no <a name="198.png" class="pb"></a> longer!' And she
-fled from the room, leaving behind her a sensation of alarm and pity.
-Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood looking at each other, both at a loss for
-words. At last he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'That poor child will cry herself into her grave. Have you noticed how
-poorly she is looking?'</p>
-
-<p>'Not noticed! But you do not know half of it. It has been going on now a
-long time. You don't know half!'</p>
-
-<p>'I have noticed that things are not settling down as I hoped they would.
-It really has become quite dreadful to see that poor face looking
-reproachfully at you all day long. And I am quite at a loss to know what's
-the right thing to do.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is worse than you think. You have not noticed that we hardly speak
-now?'</p>
-
-<p>'You&mdash;who were such friends&mdash;surely not!'</p>
-
-<p>Then she told him hurriedly, in brief phrases, of the change that had
-taken place in Emily in the last three months. 'It was only the other night
-she accused me of going after you, of having designs upon you. It is very
-painful to have to tell you these things, but I have no choice in the
-matter. She lay on her bed crying, saying that every one hated her, that
-she was thoroughly miserable. Somehow she seems naturally <a name="199.png"
-class="pb"></a> an unhappy child. She was unhappy at home before she came
-here; but then I believe she had excellent reasons,&mdash;her mother was a very
-terrible person. However, all that is past; we have to consider the present
-now. She accused me of having designs on you, insisting all the while that
-every one was talking about it, and that she was fretting solely because of
-my good name. Of course, it is very ridiculous; but it is very pitiful, and
-will end badly if we don't take means to put a stop to it. I shouldn't be
-surprised if she went off her head. We ought to have the best medical
-advice.'</p>
-
-<p>'This is very serious,' he said. And then, at the end of a long silence,
-he said again, 'This is very serious&mdash;perhaps far more serious than we
-think.'</p>
-
-<p>'Not more serious than I think. I ought to have spoken about it to you
-before; but the subject is a delicate one. She hardly sleeps at all at
-night; she cries sometimes for hours; she works herself up into such fits
-of nervousness that she doesn't know what she is saying,&mdash;accuses me of
-killing her, and then repents, declaring that I am the only one who has
-ever cared for her, and begs of me not to leave her. I do assure you it is
-becoming very serious.'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you any proposal to make regarding her? <a name="200.png"
-class="pb"></a> I need hardly say that I'm ready to carry out any idea of
-yours.'</p>
-
-<p>'You know what the cause of it is, I suppose?'</p>
-
-<p>'I do not know; I am not certain. I daresay I'm mistaken.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, you are not; I wish you were&mdash;that is to say, unless&mdash;&mdash; But I was
-saying that it is most serious. The child's health is affected; she is
-working herself up into an awful state of mind; she is losing all
-self-control. I'm sure I'm the last person who would say anything against
-her; but the time has come to speak out. Well, the other day, when we were
-at the Eastwicks, you took the chair next to mine when she left the room.
-When she returned, she saw that you had changed your place, and she said to
-Ethel Eastwick, "Oh, I'm fainting. I cannot go in there; they are
-together." Ethel had to take her up to her room. Well, this morbid
-sensitiveness is most unhealthy. If I walk out on the terrace, she follows,
-thinking that I have made an appointment to meet you. Jealousy of me fills
-up her whole mind. I assure you that I am most seriously alarmed. Something
-occurs every day&mdash;trifles, no doubt; and in anybody else they would mean
-nothing, but in her they mean a great deal.'</p>
-
-<p>'But what do you propose?'</p>
-
-<a name="201.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Unless you intend to marry her&mdash;forgive me for speaking so plain&mdash;there
-is only one thing to do. I must leave.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no; you must not leave! She could not live alone with me. But does
-she want you to leave?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; that is the worst of it. I have proposed it; she will not hear of
-it; to mention the subject is to provoke a scene. She is afraid if I left
-that you would come and see me; and the very thought of my escaping her
-vigilance is intolerable.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is very strange.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, it is very strange; but, opposed though she be to all thoughts of
-it, I must leave.'</p>
-
-<p>'As a favour I ask you to stay. Do me this service, I beg of you. I have
-set my heart on finishing my play this autumn. If it isn't finished now, it
-never will be finished; and your leaving would create so much trouble that
-all thought of work would be out of the question. Emily could not remain
-alone here with me. I should have to find another companion for her; and
-you know how difficult that would be. I'm worried quite enough as it is.' A
-look of pain passed through his eyes, and Mrs. Bentley wondered what he he
-could mean. 'No,' he said, taking her hands, 'we are good friends&mdash;are we
-not? Do me this service. <a name="202.png" class="pb"></a> Stay with me
-until I finish this play; then, if things do not mend, go, if you like, but
-not now. Will you promise me?'</p>
-
-<p>'I promise.'</p>
-
-<p>'Thank you. I am deeply obliged to you.'</p>
-
-<p>At the end of a long silence, Hubert said, 'Will you not come up-stairs,
-and let me read you the first act?'</p>
-
-<p>'I should like to, but I think it better not. If Emily heard that you
-had read me your play, she would not close her eyes to-night; it would be
-tears and misery all the night through.'</p>
-
-<a name="203.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XVI</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">The</span> study in which he had determined to
-write his masterpiece had been fitted up with taste and care. The floor was
-covered with a rare Persian carpet, and the walls were lined with graceful
-bookcases of Chippendale design; the volumes, half morocco, calf, and the
-yellow paper of French novels, showed through the diamond panes. The
-writing-table stood in front of the window; like the bookcases, it was
-Chippendale, and on the dark mahogany the handsome silver inkstand seemed
-to invite literary composition. There was a scent of flowers in the room.
-Emily had filled a bowl of old china with some pale September roses. The
-curtains were made of a modern cretonne&mdash;their colour was similar to the
-bowl of roses; and the large couch on which Hubert lay was covered with the
-same material. On one wall there was a sea-piece by Courbet, and upon
-another a river landscape, with rosy-tinted evening sky, by Corot. The
-chimney-piece was set out with a large gilt timepiece, and candelabra <a
-name="204.png" class="pb"></a> in Dresden china. Hubert had bought these
-works of art on the occasion of his last visit to London, about two months
-ago.</p>
-
-<p>It was twelve o'clock. He had finished reading his second act, and the
-reading had been a bitter disappointment. The idea floated, pure and
-seductive, in his mind; but when he tried to reduce it to a precise shape
-upon paper, it seemed to escape in some vague, mysterious way. Enticingly,
-like a butterfly it fluttered before him; he followed like a child,
-eagerly&mdash;his brain set on the mazy flight. It led him through a country
-where all was promise of milk and honey. He followed, sure that the
-alluring spirit would soon choose a flower; then he would capture it. Often
-it seemed to settle. He approached with palpitating heart; but lo! when the
-net was withdrawn it was empty.</p>
-
-<p>A look of pain and perplexity came upon his face; he remembered the
-lodging at seven shillings a week in the Tottenham Court Road. He had
-suffered there; but it seemed to him that he was suffering more here. He
-had changed his surroundings, but he had not changed himself. Success and
-failure, despair and hope, joy and sorrow, lie within and not without us.
-His pain lay at his heart's root; he could not pluck it forth, and its
-gratification seemed more than ever <a name="205.png" class="pb"></a>
-impossible. He changed his position on the couch. Suddenly his thoughts
-said, 'Perhaps I am mistaken in the subject. Perhaps that is the reason.
-Perhaps there is no play to be extracted from it; perhaps it would be
-better to abandon it and choose another.' For a few seconds he scanned the
-literary horizon of his mind. 'No, no!' he said bitterly, 'this is the play
-I was born to write. No other subject is possible; I can think of nothing
-else. This is all I can feel or see.' It was the second act that now defied
-his efforts. It had once seemed clear and of exquisite proportions; now no
-second act seemed possible: the subject did not seem to admit of a second
-act; and, clasping his forehead with his hands, he strove to think it
-out.</p>
-
-<p>Any distraction from the haunting pain, now become chronic, is welcome,
-and he answers with a glad 'Come in!' the knock at the door.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm sorry,' said Mrs. Bentley, 'for disturbing you, but I should like
-to know what fish you would like for your dinner&mdash;soles, turbot, or
-whiting? Immersed in literary problems as you are, I daresay these details
-are very prosaic; but I notice that later in the day&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert laughed. 'I find such details far more agreeable than literature.
-I can do nothing with my play.'</p>
-
-<a name="206.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Aren't you getting on this morning?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, not very well.'</p>
-
-<p>'What do you think of turbot?'</p>
-
-<p>'I think turbot very nice. Emily likes turbot.'</p>
-
-<p>'Very well, then. I'll order turbot.'</p>
-
-<p>As Mrs. Bentley was about to withdraw, she said, 'I'm sorry you are not
-getting on. What stops you now? That second act?'</p>
-
-<p>'Come, you are not very busy. I'll read you the act as it stands, and
-then tell you how I think it ought to be altered. Nothing helps me so much
-as to talk it over; not only does it clear up my ideas, but it gives me
-desire to write. My best work has always been done in that way.'</p>
-
-<p>'I really don't think I can stay. If Emily heard that you had been
-reading your play to me&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm tired of hearing of what Emily thinks. I can put up with a good
-deal, and I know that it is my duty to show much forbearance; but there is
-a limit to all things!' This was the first time Mrs. Bentley had seen him
-show either excitement or anger; she hardly knew him in this new aspect. In
-a moment the blonde calm of the Saxon had dropped from him, and some Celtic
-emphasis appeared in his speech. 'This hysterical girl,' he continued, 'is
-a sore burden. Tears <a name="207.png" class="pb"></a> about this, and
-sighs about that; fainting fits because I happen to take a chair next to
-yours. You may depend upon it our lives are already the constant gossip of
-the neighbourhood.'</p>
-
-<p>'I know it is very annoying; and I, I assure you, receive my share.
-Every look and word is misinterpreted. I must not stay here.'</p>
-
-<p>'You must not go! I really want you. I assure you that your opinion will
-be of value.'</p>
-
-<p>'But think of Emily. It will make her wretched if she hears of it. You
-do not know how it affects her. The slightest thing! You hardly see
-anything; I see it all.'</p>
-
-<p>'But there is no sense in it; it is pure madness. I'm writing a play,
-trying to work out a most difficult problem, and am in want of an audience,
-and I ask you if you will be kind enough to let me read you the act, and
-you cannot listen to it because&mdash;because&mdash;yes, that's just
-it&mdash;because!'</p>
-
-<p>'You do not know how she suffers. Let me go; spare her the pain.'</p>
-
-<p>'She is not the only one who suffers. Do you think that I don't suffer?
-I've set my heart&mdash;my very life is set on this play. I must get through
-with it; they are all waiting for it. My enemies say I cannot write it, but
-I shall if you will help me.'</p>
-
-<a name="208.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<div class="image"><a href="images/image05.jpeg"><img src="images/image05-thumb.jpeg"
-align="left" alt="[drawing]"></a>
-
-"Sometimes, in an exciting passage, the hands were clasped." </div>
-
-<br>
-
-<a name="209.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<a name="210.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Poor Emily's heart is equally broken. Her life is equally set&mdash;&mdash;' Mrs.
-Bentley did not finish. Hubert just caught the words. Their significance
-struck him; he looked questioningly into Mrs. Bentley's eyes; then,
-pretending not to have understood, he begged her to remain. With the air of
-one who yields to a temptation, she came into the room. He felt strangely
-happy, and, drawing over an arm-chair for her, he threw himself on the
-couch. He noticed that she wore a loose white jacket, and once during the
-reading of the act he was conscious of a beautiful hand hanging over the
-rail of the chair. Sometimes, in an exciting passage, the hands were
-clasped. The black slippers and the slender black-stockinged ankles showed
-beneath the skirt; and when he raised his eyes from the manuscript, he saw
-the blonde face and hair, and the pale eyes were always fixed upon him. She
-listened with a keen and penetrating interest to his criticism of the act,
-agreeing with him generally, sometimes quietly contesting a point, and with
-some strange fascination drawing new and unexpected ideas from him; and in
-the intellectual warmth of her femininity his brain seemed to clear and his
-ideas took new shape.</p>
-
-<p>'Ah,' he said, after two hours' delightful talk, 'how much I'm indebted
-to you! At last I see my mistakes; <a name="211.png" class="pb"></a> in two
-days I shall have written the act. And he wrote rapidly for nearly two
-hours, reconstructing the opening scenes of his second act.' He then threw
-himself on the couch, smoked a cigar, and after half an hour's rest
-continued writing till dinner-time.</p>
-
-<p>When he came down-stairs, the thought of what he had been writing was
-still so vivid in him that he did not notice at once the silence of those
-with whom he was dining. He complimented Mrs. Bentley on the freshness of
-the turbot; she hardly answered; and then he became aware that something
-had gone wrong. What? Only one thing was possible. Emily had heard that
-Mrs. Bentley had been in his study. Looking from the woman to the girl, he
-saw that the latter had been weeping. She was still in a highly hysterical
-state, and might burst into tears and fly from the dinner-table at any
-moment. His face changed expression, and it was with difficulty that he
-restrained his temper. His life had been made up of a constant recurrence
-of these scenes, and he was wholly weary of them; and the thought of the
-absolute want of reason in the causeless jealousy, and the misery that
-these little bickerings made of his life, exasperated him beyond measure.
-The dinner proceeded in silence, and every slight remark was a presage of
-storm. <a name="212.png" class="pb"></a> Hubert hoped the girl would say
-nothing until the servant left the room, and with that view he never spoke
-a word except to ask the ladies what they would take to eat. These tactics
-might have succeeded if Mrs. Bentley had not unfortunately said that next
-week she intended to go to London for a couple of days. 'The Eastwicks are
-there now, and they've asked me to stay with them.'</p>
-
-<p>'I think I shall go up with you. I want to go to London,' said
-Emily.</p>
-
-<p>'It will be very nice if you'll come; but we cannot both stay with the
-Eastwicks; they have only one spare room.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose you'd like me to go to an hotel.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, how can you think of such a thing? A young girl like you
-could not stay at an hotel alone. I shall be only too pleased if you will
-go to the Eastwicks; I will go to the hotel.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily's lip quivered, and in the irritating silence both Hubert and Mrs.
-Bentley saw that she was trying to overcome her passion. They fervently
-hoped she would succeed; for at that moment the servant was handing round
-the wine, and the time he took to accomplish this service seemed endless.
-He had filled the last glass, had handed round the dessert, <a
-name="213.png" class="pb"></a> and was preparing to leave the room when
-Emily said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'The hotel will suit you very well. You'll be free to see Hubert
-whenever you like.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert looked up quickly, hoping Mrs. Bentley would not answer, but
-before he could make a sign she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'What do you mean, Emily? I did not know that Hubert was going to
-London.'</p>
-
-<p>'You hardly expect me to believe that, do you?'</p>
-
-<p>The servant was still in the room; but no look of astonishment appeared
-on his face, and Hubert hoped he had not heard. An awful silence glowered
-upon the dinner-table. The moment the door closed Hubert said, turning
-angrily to Emily&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Really, I am quite surprised, Emily, that you should make such
-observations in the presence of servants! This has been going on quite long
-enough; you are making the house intolerable. I shall not be able to live
-here any longer.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily burst into a passionate flood of tears. She declared she was
-wretchedly miserable, and that she fully understood that Hubert had begun
-to regret that he had asked her to stay at Ashwood. Everything had been
-taken from her; every one was against her. Her <a name="214.png"
-class="pb"></a> sobs shook her frail little frame as if they would break
-it, and Hubert's heart was wrung at the sight of such genuine
-suffering.</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I assure you you are mistaken. We both love you very
-much.' He got up from his chair, and, putting his arm about her, besought
-her to dry her eyes; but she shook him passionately from her, and fled from
-the room.</p>
-
-<p>Three days after, Emily tore up one of her songs, because Mrs. Bentley
-had sung it without her leave. And so on and so on, week after week. No
-sooner was one quarrel allayed than signs of another began to appear.
-Hubert despaired. 'How is this to end?' he asked himself every day. Mrs.
-Bentley begged him to cancel her promise, and allow her to go. But that was
-impossible. He could not remain alone with Emily; if he left her she would
-not fail to believe that he had gone after her rival. The situation had
-become so tense that they ended by discussing these questions almost
-without reserve. To make matters worse, Emily had begun visibly to lose her
-health. There was neither colour in her cheeks nor light in her eyes; she
-hardly slept at all, and had grown more than ever like a little shadow. The
-doctor had been summoned, and, after prescribing a tonic, had advised quiet
-<a name="215.png" class="pb"></a> and avoidance of all excitement.
-Therefore Hubert and Mrs. Bentley agreed never to meet except when Emily
-was present, and then strove to speak as little as possible to each other.
-But the very fact of having to restrain themselves in looks, glances, and
-every slightest word&mdash;for Emily misinterpreted all things&mdash;whetted their
-appetites for each other's society.</p>
-
-<p>In the misery of his study, when he watched the sheet of paper, he often
-sought relief in remembrance of her sweet manner, and the happy morning he
-had spent in her companionship. What he had written under the direct
-influence of her inspiration still seemed to him to be less bad than the
-rest of his play; and he began to feel sure that, if ever this play were
-written, it would be written in the benign charm of her sweet
-encouragement, in the reposeful shadow of her presence. But that presence
-was forbidden him&mdash;that presence that seemed so necessary; and for what
-reason? Turning on the circumstances of his life, he raged against them,
-declaring that it would be folly to allow his very life's desire to be
-frittered away to gratify a young girl's caprice,&mdash;a caprice which in a few
-years she would laugh at. And whenever he was not thinking of his play, he
-remembered the charm of Mrs. Bentley's company, and the beneficent effect
-it had on his work. He had never <a name="216.png" class="pb"></a> known a
-woman he had liked so much, and he felt&mdash;he started at the thought, so like
-an inspiration did it seem to him&mdash;that the only possible solution of the
-present situation was his marriage with her. Once he was married, Emily
-would soon learn to forget him. They would take her up to London for the
-season; and, amid the healthy excitement of balls and parties, her girlish
-fancy would evaporate. No doubt she would meet again the young cavalry
-officer whose addresses she had received so coldly. She would be sure to
-meet him again&mdash;be sure to think him the most charming man in the world;
-they would marry, and she would make him the best possible wife. The
-kindest action they could do Emily would be to marry. There was nothing
-else to do, and they must do something, or else the girl would die. It
-seemed wonderful to Hubert that he had not thought of all this before. 'It
-is the very obvious solution of the problem,' he said; and his heart beat
-as he heard Mrs. Bentley's step in the corridor. It died away in the
-distance; but a few days after, when he heard it again, he jumped from his
-chair, and ran to the door. 'Come,' he said, 'I want to speak to you.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no, I beg of you!'</p>
-
-<p>'I must speak to you!' He laid his hand upon her <a name="217.png"
-class="pb"></a> arm, and said, 'I beg of you. I have something to say&mdash;it
-is of great importance. Come in.'</p>
-
-<p>They looked at each other a moment, and it seemed as if they could see
-into each other's souls. Then a look of yielding passed into her eyes, and
-she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Well, what is it?'</p>
-
-<p>The familiarity of the words struck her, and she saw by the kindling
-tenderness in his eyes that they had given him pleasure. She almost knew he
-was going to tell her that he loved her. He looked towards the open door,
-and, guessing his intention, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Don't shut it! Speak quickly. Remember that she may pass at any moment.
-Were she to find us together, she would suffer; it would be tears and
-reproaches. What you have to say to me is about her?'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course; we never speak of anything else. But we must not be
-overheard. I must shut the door.' She noticed a certain embarrassment in
-his manner. Suddenly relinquishing his intention to take her hands, he
-said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'This cannot go on; our lives are being made unbearable. You agree with
-me&mdash;do you not?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes,' she said, with a curious inquiring look in her eyes. 'You had
-better let me leave. It is the only way out of the difficulty.'</p>
-
-<a name="218.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'You know very well, Julia, that that is impossible.'</p>
-
-<p>It was the first time he had used her Christian name, and she knew now
-he was going to ask her to marry him. A frightened look passed into her
-face; she turned from him; he took her hands.</p>
-
-<p>'No, Julia,' he said; 'there is another and better way out of the
-difficulty. You will stop here&mdash;you will be my wife?' Reading the look of
-pain that had come into her eyes, he said, 'You will not refuse me? I want
-you&mdash;I can do nothing without you. If you leave me, I shall never be able
-to write my play; it can only be written under your influence. I love you,
-Julia!' She allowed him to draw her towards him, and then she broke
-away.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh,' she said, 'why do you say these things? You only make my task
-harder. You know that I cannot betray my friend. Why do you tempt me to do
-a dishonourable action?'</p>
-
-<p>'A dishonourable action! What do you mean? It is the only way to save
-her. Once we are married, she will forget. No doubt she will shed a few
-tears; but to save the body we must often lose a limb. It is even so.
-Things cannot go on as they are. We cannot watch her withering away under
-our very eyes; and that is what is actually happening. I have thought <a
-name="219.png" class="pb"></a> it all over, considered it from every point
-of view, and have come to the conclusion that&mdash;that, well, that we had
-better marry. You must have seen that I always liked you. I did not myself
-know how much until a few days ago. Say that I am not wholly disagreeable
-to you.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I will not listen to you! My conscience tells me plainly where my
-duty lies. Not for all the world will I play Emily false. I shudder to
-think of such a thing; it would be the basest ingratitude. I owe everything
-to her. When I hadn't a penny in the world, and when in my homelessness I
-wrote to Mr. Burnett, she pleaded in my favour, and decided him to take me
-as a companion. No, no! a thousand times no! Let go my hands. Do you not
-know what it is to be loyal?'</p>
-
-<p>'I hope I do. But, as I have explained, it is the only solution. The
-romantic attachments of young girls, unless nipped in the bud, often end
-fatally. Do you not see how ill she is looking? She is wearing her life
-away. We shall be acting in her best interests. Besides, she is not the
-only person to be considered. Do I not love you? Are you not the very woman
-whose influence, whose guidance, is necessary, so that I should succeed?
-Without your help I shall never <a name="220.png" class="pb"></a> write my
-play. A woman's influence is necessary to every undertaking. The greatest
-writers owe their best inspiration to&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Her heart is as closely set upon you as yours is upon your play.'</p>
-
-<p>'But,' cried Hubert, 'I do not love her! Under no circumstances would I
-marry her. That I swear to you. If she and I were alone on a desert
-island&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>Julia looked at him one moment doubtingly, inquiringly. Then she
-said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Hers is no evanescent fancy, but a passion that goes to the very roots
-of her nature, and will kill her if it be not satisfied.'</p>
-
-<p>'Or cut out in time.'</p>
-
-<p>'I must leave.'</p>
-
-<p>'That will not mend matters.'</p>
-
-<p>'My departure will, at all events, remove all cause for jealousy; and
-when I am gone you may learn to love her.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; that I swear is impossible!'</p>
-
-<p>'You very likely think so now; but I'm bound to give her every chance of
-winning you.'</p>
-
-<p>'I say again that that is impossible! I have never seen a woman except
-yourself I could marry. I tell you so: believe me as you like.... In this
-matter <a name="221.png" class="pb"></a> you are acting like a woman,&mdash;you
-allow your emotions and not your intellect to lead you. By acting thus, you
-are certainly sacrificing two lives&mdash;hers and mine. Of your own I do not
-speak, not knowing what is passing in your heart; but if by any chance you
-should care for me, you are adding your own happiness to the general
-holocaust.' Neither spoke again for some time.</p>
-
-<p>'Why should you not marry her?' Julia said, at the end of a long
-silence. 'Some people think her quite a pretty girl.'</p>
-
-<p>The lovers looked at each other and smiled sadly. And then, in pathetic
-phrases, Hubert tried to explain why he could never love Emily. He spoke of
-his age, and of difference of tastes,&mdash;he liked clever women. The
-conversation fell. At the end of a long silence, Julia said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'There is nothing for it but my departure, and the sooner the
-better.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are not in earnest? You are surely not in earnest?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, indeed I am.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then, if you go, you must take her with you. She cannot remain here
-alone with me. And even if she could, I could not live with her. Her folly
-has destroyed <a name="222.png" class="pb"></a> any liking I may have ever
-had for her. You'll have to take her with you.'</p>
-
-<p>'She would not come with me. I spoke to her once of a trip abroad.'</p>
-
-<p>'And she refused?'</p>
-
-<p>'She said she only wanted things to go on just as they are.'</p>
-
-<a name="223.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XVII</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">In</span> some trepidation Julia knocked.
-Receiving no reply, she opened the door, and her candle burnt in what a
-moment before must have been inky darkness. Emily lay on her bed&mdash;on the
-edge of it; and the only movement she made was to avert her eyes from the
-light. 'What! all alone in this darkness, Emily!... Shall I light your
-candles?' She had to repeat the question before she could get an
-answer.</p>
-
-<p>'No, thank you; I want nothing; I have no wish to see anything. I like
-the dark.'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you been asleep?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I have not.... Why do you come to torment me? It cannot matter to
-you whether I lie in the dark or the light. Oh, take that candle away! it
-is blinding me.' Julia put the candle on the washstand. Then full of pity
-for the grieving girl, she stood, her hand resting on the bed-rail.</p>
-
-<p>'Aren't you coming down to dinner, Emily? Come, <a name="224.png"
-class="pb"></a> let me pour out some water for you. When you have bathed
-your eyes&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't want any dinner.'</p>
-
-<p>'It will look very strange if you remain in your room the whole evening.
-You do not want to vex him, do you?'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose he is very angry with me. But I did not mean to vex him. Is
-he very angry?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, he is not angry at all; he is merely distressed. You distress him
-dreadfully when&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't know why I should distress him. I'm sure I don't mean to. You
-know more about it than I. You are always whispering together&mdash;talking
-about me.'</p>
-
-<p>'I assure you, Emily, you are mistaken. Mr. Price and I have no secrets
-whatever.'</p>
-
-<p>'Why should you tell me these falsehoods? They make me so
-miserable.'</p>
-
-<p>'Falsehoods, Emily! When did you ever know me to tell a falsehood?'</p>
-
-<p>'You say you have no secrets! Do you think I am blind? You think, I
-suppose, I did not see you showing him a ring? You took it off, too; and I
-suppose you gave it to him,&mdash;an engagement ring, very likely.'</p>
-
-<a name="225.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I lost a stone from my ring, and I asked Mr. Price if he would take the
-ring to London and have the stone replaced.... That is all. So you see how
-your imagination has run away with you.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not answer. At last she said, breaking the silence
-abruptly&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Is he very angry? Has he gone to his study? Do you think he will come
-down to dinner?'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose he'll come down for dinner.'</p>
-
-<p>'Will you go and ask him?'</p>
-
-<p>'I hardly see how I can do that. He is very busy.... And if you would
-listen to any advice of mine, it would be to leave him to himself as much
-as possible for the present. He is so taken up with his play; I know he's
-most anxious about it.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is he? I don't know. He never speaks to me about it. I hate that play,
-and I hate to see him go up to that study! I cannot understand why he
-should trouble himself about writing plays; he doesn't want the money, and
-it can't be agreeable sitting up there all alone thinking.... It is easy to
-see that it only makes him unhappy. But you encourage him to go on with it.
-Oh yes, you do; there's no use saying you don't. You are always talking to
-him about it; you bring the conversation up. You think I don't see how <a
-name="226.png" class="pb"></a> you do it, but I do; and you like doing it,
-because then you have him all to yourself. I can't talk to him about that
-play; and I wouldn't if I could, for it only makes him unhappy. But you
-don't care whether he's unhappy or not; you only think of yourself.'</p>
-
-<p>'You surely don't believe what you are saying is true? To-morrow you
-will be sorry for what you have said. You cannot think that I would deceive
-you, Emily? Remember what friends we have been.'</p>
-
-<p>'I remember everything. You think I don't; but I do. And you think also
-that there's no reason why I should be miserable; but there is. Because you
-do not feel my misery, you think it doesn't exist. I daresay you think,
-too, that you are very good and kind; but you aren't. You think you deceive
-me; but you don't. I know all that is passing between you and Hubert. I
-know a great deal more than I can explain....'</p>
-
-<p>'But tell me, Emily, what is it you suspect? What do you accuse me
-of?'</p>
-
-<p>'I accuse you of nothing. Can't you understand that things may go wrong
-without it being any one's fault in particular?'</p>
-
-<p>Julia wondered how Emily could think so wisely. She seemed to have grown
-wiser in her grief. But <a name="227.png" class="pb"></a> grief helped her
-no further in her instinctive perception of the truth, and she resumed her
-puerile attack on her friend.</p>
-
-<p>'Nothing has gone well with me ever since you came here. I was
-disinherited; and I daresay you were glad, for you knew that if the money
-did not come to me it would go to Hubert, and I do know&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'What are you saying, Emily? I never heard of such wild accusations
-before! You know very well that I never set eyes on Mr. Price until he came
-down here.'</p>
-
-<p>'How should I know what you know or don't know? But I know that all my
-life every one has been plotting against me. And I cannot make out why. I
-never did harm to any one.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused. Emily flung herself back on the pillow. Not
-even a sob. The candle burned like a long yellow star in the shadows,
-yielding only sufficient light for Julia to see the outlines of a somewhat
-untidy room,&mdash;an old-fashioned mahogany wardrobe, cloudy and black, upon
-old-fashioned grey paper, some cardboard boxes, and a number of china
-ornaments, set out on a small table covered with a tablecloth in
-crewel-work.</p>
-
-<p>'I would do anything in the world for you, Emily. I am your best friend,
-and yet&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<a name="228.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I have no friend. I don't believe in friends. You think people are your
-friends, and then you find they are not.'</p>
-
-<p>'How can I convince you of the injustice of your suspicions?'</p>
-
-<p>'I see all plainly enough; it is fate, I suppose.... Selfishness. We all
-think of ourselves&mdash;we can't help it; and that's what makes life so
-miserable.... He would be a very good match. You have got him to like you.
-Perhaps you didn't intend to; but you have done it all the same.'</p>
-
-<p>'But, Emily dear, listen! There is no question of marriage between me
-and Mr. Price. If you will only have patience, things will come right in
-the end.'</p>
-
-<p>'For you, perhaps.'</p>
-
-<p>'Emily, Emily! ... You should try to understand things better.'</p>
-
-<p>'I feel them, even if I don't understand.'</p>
-
-<p>'Admit that you were wrong about the ring. Have I not convinced you that
-you were wrong?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not answer. But at the end of a long silence, in which she had
-been pursuing a different train of thought, she said, 'Then you mean that
-he has never asked you to marry him?'</p>
-
-<p>The directness of the question took Julia by surprise, <a name="229.png"
-class="pb"></a> and, falsehood being unnatural to her, she hesitated,
-hardly knowing what to answer. Her hesitation was only momentary; but in
-that moment there came up such a wave of pity for the grief-stricken girl
-that she lied for pity's sake, 'No, he never asked me to marry him. I
-assure you that he never did. If you do not believe me&mdash;&mdash;' As she was
-about to say, 'I will swear it if you like,' an irresponsible sensation of
-pride in her ownership of his love surged up through her, overwhelming her
-will, and she ended the sentence, 'I am very sorry, but I cannot help
-it.'</p>
-
-<p>The words were still well enough; it was in the accent that the truth
-transpired. And then yielding still further to the force which had
-subjugated her will, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I admit that we have talked about a great many things.' (Again she
-strove not to speak, but the words rose red-hot to her lips.) 'He has said
-that he would like to marry, but I should not think of accepting&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Then it is just as I thought!' Emily cried; 'he wants to get rid of
-me!'</p>
-
-<p>Julia was shocked and surprised at the depth of disgraceful vanity and
-cowardice which special circumstances had brought within her consciousness.
-The Julia Bentley of the last few moments was not the Julia <a
-name="230.png" class="pb"></a> Bentley she was accustomed to meet and
-interrogate, and she asked herself how she might exorcise the meanness that
-had so unexpectedly appeared in her. Should she pile falsehood on
-falsehood? She felt it would be cruel not to do so; but Emily said, 'He
-wants to marry to get rid of me, and not because he loves you.' Then it was
-hard to deny herself the pleasure of telling the whole truth; but she
-mastered her desire of triumph, and, actuated by nothing but sincerest love
-and pity, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, Emily dear, he never asked me to marry him; he does not love me at
-all! Why will you not believe me?'</p>
-
-<p>'Because I cannot!' she cried passionately. 'I only ask to be left
-alone.'</p>
-
-<p>'A little patience, Emily, and all will come right. Mr. Price does not
-want to get rid of you. You wrong him just as you wrong me. He has often
-said how much he likes you; indeed he has.' Although speaking from the
-bottom of her heart, it seemed to Julia that she was playing the part of a
-cruel, false woman, who was designingly plotting to betray a helpless girl;
-and not understanding why this was so, she was at once puzzled and
-confused. It seemed to her that she was being borne on in a wind of
-destiny, and her will <a name="231.png" class="pb"></a> seemed to beat
-vainly against it, like a bird's wings when a storm is blowing. She was
-conscious of a curious powerlessness; it surprised her, and she could not
-understand why she continued talking, so vain and useless did words seem to
-her&mdash;an idle patter. She continued&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'You think that I stand between you and Mr. Price. Now, I assure you
-that it is not so. I tell you I should refuse Mr. Price, even if he were to
-ask me to marry him, here, at this very moment. I pledge you my word on
-this. Give me your hand, Emily. You will not refuse it?' Emily gave her
-hand. 'It is quite ridiculous to promise, for he will never ask me; but I
-promise not to marry him even if he should ask me.' She gave the promise,
-determined to keep it; and yet she knew she would not keep it. She argued
-passionately with herself, a prey to an inward dread; for no matter how
-firmly she forced resolution upon resolution, they all seemed to melt in
-her soul like snow on a blazing fire. Then, determined to rid herself of a
-numb sensation of powerlessness, and achieve the end she desired, she said,
-'I'll tell you, Emily, what I'll do. I'll not stay here; I will go away.
-Let me go away, dear, and then it will be all right.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no! you mustn't leave; I don't want you to <a name="232.png"
-class="pb"></a> leave. It would be said everywhere that I had you sent
-away.... You promise me not to leave?' Raising herself, Emily clung to
-Julia's arm, detaining her until she had extorted the desired promise.</p>
-
-<p>'Very well; I promise,' she said sadly. 'But I think you are wrong;
-indeed I do. I have always thought that "the only solution of the problem"
-was my departure.' Memory had betrayed her into Hubert's own phrase.</p>
-
-<p>'Why should you go? You think, I suppose, that I'm in love with Hubert?
-I'm not. All I want is for things to go on just the same&mdash;for us to be
-friends as we were before.'</p>
-
-<p>'Very well, Emily&mdash;very well.... But in the meantime you must not
-neglect your meals as you have been doing lately. If you don't take care,
-you'll lose your health and your looks. I have been noticing how thin you
-are looking.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose you have told him that I am looking thin and ill.... Men like
-tall, big, healthy women like you&mdash;don't they?'</p>
-
-<p>'I see, Emily, that it is hopeless; every word one utters is
-misinterpreted. Dinner will be ready in a few minutes; or, if you like, I
-will dine up-stairs; and you and Mr. Price&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<a name="233.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'But is he coming down to dinner? I thought you said he had gone to his
-study; sometimes he dines there.'</p>
-
-<p>'I can tell you nothing about Mr. Price. I don't know whether he'll dine
-up-stairs or down.'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment a knock was heard at the door, and the servant announced
-that dinner was ready. 'Mr. Price has sent down word, ma'am, that he is
-very busy writing; he hopes you'll excuse him, and he'll be glad if you
-will send him his dinner up on a tray.'</p>
-
-<p>'Very well; I shall be down directly.'</p>
-
-<p>The slight interruption had sufficed to calm Julia's irritation, and she
-stood waiting for Emily. But seeing that she showed no signs of moving, she
-said, 'Aren't you coming down to dinner, Emily?' It was a sense of strict
-duty that impelled the question, for her heart sank at the prospect of
-spending the evening alone with the girl. But seeing the tears on Emily's
-cheeks, she sat down beside her, and said, 'Dearest Emily, if you would
-only confide in me!'</p>
-
-<p>'There's nothing to confide....'</p>
-
-<p>'You mustn't give way like this; you really mustn't. Come down and have
-some dinner.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is no use; I couldn't eat anything.'</p>
-
-<a name="234.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'He may come into the drawing-room in the course of the evening, and
-will be so disappointed and grieved to hear that you have not been
-down.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; he will spend the whole evening in his room; we shall not see him
-again.'</p>
-
-<p>'But if I go and ask him to come; if I tell him&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'No; do not speak to him about me; he'd only say that I was interfering
-with his work.'</p>
-
-<p>'That is unjust, Emily; he has never reproached you with interfering
-with his work. Shall I go and tell him that you won't come down because you
-think he is angry with you?'</p>
-
-<p>Ten minutes passed, and no answer could be obtained from Emily&mdash;only
-passionate and illusive refusals, denials, prayer to be left alone; and
-these mingled with irritating suggestions that Julia had better go at once,
-that Hubert might be waiting for her. But Julia bore patiently with her and
-did not leave her until Hubert sent to know why his dinner was delayed.</p>
-
-<p>Emily had begun to undress; and, tearing off her things, she hardly took
-more than five minutes to get into bed.</p>
-
-<p>'Shall I light a candle?' Julia asked before leaving.</p>
-
-<p>'No, thank you.'</p>
-
-<a name="235.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Shall I send you up some soup?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I could not touch it.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are not going to remain in the dark? Let me light a
-night-light?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, thank you; I like the dark.'</p>
-
-<a name="236.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XVIII</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Hubert</span> and Mrs. Bentley stood by the
-chimney-piece in the drawing-room, waiting for the doctor; they had left
-him with Emily, and stood facing each other absorbed in thought, when the
-door opened, and the doctor entered. Hubert said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'What do you think, Doctor? Is she seriously ill?'</p>
-
-<p>'There is nothing, so far as I can make out, organically the matter with
-her, but the system is running down. She is very thin and weak. I shall
-prescribe a tonic, but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'But what, doctor?'</p>
-
-<p>'She seems to be suffering from extreme depression of spirits. Do you
-know of any secret grief&mdash;any love affair? At her age, anything of that
-sort fills the entire mind, and the consequences are often grave.'</p>
-
-<p>'And supposing it were so, what would be your advice? Change of air and
-scene?'</p>
-
-<p>'Certainly.'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you spoken to her on the subject?'</p>
-
-<a name="237.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Yes; but she says she will not leave Ashwood.'</p>
-
-<p>'We cannot send her away by force. What would you advise us to do?'</p>
-
-<p>'There's nothing to be done. We must hope for the best. There is no
-immediate cause for fear.... But, by the way, she looks as if she suffered
-from sleeplessness.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, she does; but she has been ordered chloral. Any harm in that?'</p>
-
-<p>'In her case, it is a necessity; but do you think she takes it?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, she has been taking choral.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused; the doctor went over to the writing-table,
-wrote a prescription, made a few remarks, and took his leave, announcing
-his intention of returning that day fortnight.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert said, and his tone implied reference to some anterior
-conversation, 'We are powerless in this matter. You see we can do nothing.
-We only succeed in making ourselves unhappy; we do not change in anything.
-I am wretchedly unhappy!'</p>
-
-<p>'Believe me,' she said, raising her arms in a beautiful feminine
-movement, 'I do not wish to make you unhappy.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then why do you persist? Why do you refuse <a name="238.png"
-class="pb"></a> to take the only step that may lead us out of this
-difficulty?'</p>
-
-<p>'How can you ask me? Oh, Hubert, I did not think you could be so cruel!
-It would be a shameful action.'</p>
-
-<p>It was the first time she had used his Christian name, and his face
-changed expression.</p>
-
-<p>'I cannot,' she said, 'and I will not, and I do not understand how you
-can ask me&mdash;you who are so loyal, how can you ask me to be disloyal?'</p>
-
-<p>'Spare me your reproaches. Fate has been cruel. I have never told you
-the story of my life. I have suffered deeply; my pride has been humiliated,
-and I have endured hunger and cold; but those sufferings were light
-compared to this last misfortune.'</p>
-
-<p>She looked at him with sublime pity in her eyes. 'I do not conceal from
-you,' she said, 'that I love you very much. I, too, have suffered, and I
-had thought for one moment that fate had vouchsafed me happiness; but, as
-you would say&mdash;the irony of life.'</p>
-
-<p>'Julia, do not say you never will?'</p>
-
-<p>'We cannot look into the future. But this I can say&mdash;I will not do Emily
-any wrong, and so far as is in my power I will avoid giving her pain. There
-is only one way out of this difficulty. I must leave this house as soon as
-I can persuade her to let me go.'</p>
-
-<a name="239.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>The door opened; involuntarily the speakers moved apart; and though
-their faces and attitudes were strictly composed when Emily entered, she
-knew they had been standing closer together.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm afraid I'm interrupting you,' she said.</p>
-
-<p>'No, Emily; pray do not go away. We were only talking about you.'</p>
-
-<p>'If I were to leave every time you begin to talk about me, I should
-spend my life in my room. I daresay you have many faults to find. Let me
-hear all about your fresh discoveries.'</p>
-
-<p>It was a thin November day: leaves were whirling on the lawn, and at
-that moment one blew rustling down the window-pane. And, even as it, she
-seemed a passing thing. Her face was like a plate of fine white porcelain,
-and the deep eyes filled it with a strange and magnetic pathos; the
-abundant chestnut hair hung in the precarious support of a thin
-tortoiseshell; and there was something unforgetable in the manner in which
-her aversion for the elder woman betrayed itself&mdash;a mere nothing, and yet
-more impressive than any more obvious and therefore more vulgar expression
-of dislike would have been.</p>
-
-<p>'A little patience, Emily. You will not have me here much longer.'</p>
-
-<a name="240.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I suppose that I am so disagreeable that you cannot live with me. Why
-should you go away?'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, you must not excite yourself. The doctor&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I want to know why she said she was going to leave. Has she been
-complaining about me to you? What is her reason for wanting to go?'</p>
-
-<p>'We do not get on together as we used to&mdash;that is all, Emily. I can
-please you no longer.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is not my fault if we do not get on. I don't see why we shouldn't,
-and I do not want you to go.'</p>
-
-<p>'Emily, dear, everything shall be as you like it.'</p>
-
-<p>The girl looked at him with the shy, doubting look of an animal that
-would like, and still does not dare, to go to the beckoning hand. How frail
-seemed the body in the black dress! and how thin the arms in the black
-sleeves! Hubert took the little hand in his. At his touch a look of content
-and rest passed into her eyes, and she yielded herself as the leaf yields
-to the wind. She was all his when he chose. Mrs. Bentley left the room;
-and, seeing her go, a light of sudden joy illuminated the thin, pale face;
-and when the door closed, and she was alone with him, the bleak, unhappy
-look, which had lately grown strangely habitual to her, faded out of her
-face and eyes. He fetched <a name="241.png" class="pb"></a> her shawl, and
-took her hand again in his, knowing that by so doing he made her happy. He
-could not refuse her the peace from pain that these attentions brought her,
-though he would have held himself aloof from all women but one. She knew
-the truth well enough; but they who suffer much think only of the cessation
-of pain. He wondered at the inveigling content that introduced itself into
-her voice, face, and gesture. Settling herself comfortably on the sofa, she
-said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Now tell me what the doctor said. Did he say I would soon recover? Did
-he say that I was very bad? Tell me all.'</p>
-
-<p>'He said that you ought to have a change&mdash;that you should go south
-somewhere.'</p>
-
-<p>'And you agree with him that I ought to go away?'</p>
-
-<p>'Is he not the best judge?&mdash;the doctor's orders!'</p>
-
-<p>'Then you, too, have learnt to hate me. You, too, want to send me
-away?'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I only want to do as you like. You asked me what the
-doctor said, and I told you.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert got up and walked aside. He passed his hand across his eyes. He
-could hardly contain himself; the emotion that discussion with this sick
-girl <a name="242.png" class="pb"></a> caused him went to his head. She
-looked at him curiously, watching his movement, and he failed to understand
-what pleasure it could give her to have him by her side, knowing, as she
-clearly did, that his heart was elsewhere. Turning suddenly, he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'But tell me, Emily, how are you feeling? You are, after all, the best
-judge.'</p>
-
-<p>'I feel rather weak. I should get strong enough if&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>She paused, as if waiting for Hubert to ask her to finish the sentence.
-But he hurriedly turned the conversation.</p>
-
-<p>'The doctor said you looked as if you had not had any sleep for several
-nights. I told him that that was strange, for you were taking chloral.'</p>
-
-<p>'I sleep well enough,' she said. 'But sometimes life seems so sad, that
-I do not think I shall be able to bear with it any longer. You do not know
-how unfortunate I have been. When I was a child, father and mother used to
-quarrel always, and I was the only child. That was why Mr. Burnett asked me
-to come and live at Ashwood. I came at first on a visit; and when father
-and mother died, he said he wished to adopt me. I thought he loved me; but
-his love was <a name="243.png" class="pb"></a> only selfishness. No one has
-ever loved me. I feel so utterly alone in this world&mdash;that is why I am
-unhappy.'</p>
-
-<p>Her eyes filled with tears, and at the sight of her tears Hubert's
-feelings were overwrought, and again he had to walk aside. He would give
-her all things; but she was dying for him, and he could not save her. No
-longer was there any disguisement between them. The words they uttered were
-as nothing, so clearly did the thought shine out of their eyes, 'I am dying
-of love for you,' and then the answer, 'I know that is so, and I cannot
-help it.' Her whole soul was spoken in her eyes, and he felt that his eyes
-betrayed him equally plainly. They stood in a sort of mental nakedness. The
-woman no longer sought for words to cover herself with; the man did, but he
-did not find them. They had not spoken for some time; they had been
-thinking of each other. At last she said, and with the querulous perversity
-of the sick&mdash;-</p>
-
-<p>'But even if I wished to go abroad, with whom could I go?'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert fell into the trap, and, noticing the sudden brightness in his
-eyes, a cloud of disappointment shadowed hers. 'Of course, with Mrs.
-Bentley. I assure you, my dear Emily, that you&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<a name="244.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'No, no, I am not mistaken! She hates me, and I cannot bear her. It is
-she who is making me ill.'</p>
-
-<p>'Hate you! Why should she hate you?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not reply. Hubert watched her, noticing the pallor of her
-cheek, so entirely white and blue, hardly a touch of warm colour anywhere,
-even in the shadow of the heavy hair.</p>
-
-<p>'I would give anything to see you friends again.'</p>
-
-<p>'That is impossible! I can never be friends with Julia as I once was.
-She has&mdash;&mdash; No, never can we be friends again. But why do you always take
-her part against me? That is what grieves me most. If only you
-thought&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Emily dear, these are but idle fancies. You are mistaken.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation fell. The girl lay quite still, her hands clasped
-across the shawl, her little foot stretched beyond the limp black dress,
-the hem of which fell over the edge of the grey sofa. Hubert sat by her on
-a low chair, and he looked into the fire, whose light wavered over the
-walls, now and again bringing the face of one of the pictures out of the
-darkness. The wind whined about the windows. Then, speaking as if out of a
-dream, Emily said&mdash;</p>
-
-<a name="245.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Julia and I can never be friends again&mdash;that is impossible.'</p>
-
-<p>'But what has she done?' Hubert asked incautiously, regretting his words
-as soon as he had uttered them.</p>
-
-<p>'What has she done?' she said, looking at him curiously. 'Well, one
-thing, she has got it reported that&mdash;that I am in love with you, and that
-that is the reason of my illness.'</p>
-
-<p>'I am sure she never said any such thing. You are entirely mistaken.
-Mrs. Bentley is incapable of such wickedness.'</p>
-
-<p>'A woman, when she is jealous, will say anything. If she did not say it,
-can you tell me how it got about?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't believe any one ever said such a thing.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, lots have said so&mdash;things come back to me. Julia always was
-jealous of me. She cannot bear me to speak to you. Have you not noticed how
-she follows us? Do you think she would have left the room just now if she
-could have helped it?'</p>
-
-<p>'If you think this is so, had she not better leave?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not answer at once. Motionless she lay on the sofa, looking at
-the grey November day with vague eyes that bespoke an obsession of
-hallucination. <a name="246.png" class="pb"></a> Suddenly she said, 'I do
-not want her to go away. She would spread a report that I was jealous of
-her, and had asked you to send her away. No; it would not be wise to send
-her away. Besides,' she said, fixing her eyes, now full of melancholy
-reproach, 'you would like her to remain.'</p>
-
-<p>'I have said before, Emily, and I assure you I am speaking the truth, I
-want you to do what you like. Say what you wish to be done, and it shall be
-done.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is that really true? I thought no one cared for me. You must care for
-me a little to speak like that.'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course I care for you, Emily.'</p>
-
-<p>'I sometimes think you might have if it had not been for that play; for,
-of course, I'm not clever, and cannot discuss it with you.... Julia, I
-suppose, can&mdash;that is the reason why you like her. Am I not right?'</p>
-
-<p>'Mrs. Bentley is a clever woman, who has read a great deal, and I like
-to talk an act over with her before I write it.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is that all? Then why do people say you are going to marry her?'</p>
-
-<p>'But nobody ever said so.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, they have. Is it true?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, Emily; it is not true.'</p>
-
-<a name="247.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Are you quite sure?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, quite sure.'</p>
-
-<p>'If that is so,' she said, turning her eyes on Hubert, and looking as if
-she could see right down into his soul, 'I shall get well very soon. Then
-we can go on just the same; but if you married her, I&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I what?'</p>
-
-<p>'Nothing! I feel quite happy now. I did not want you to marry her. I
-could not bear it. It would be like having a step-mother&mdash;worse, for she
-would not have me here at all; she would drive me away.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert shook his head.</p>
-
-<p>'You don't know Julia as well as I do. However, it is no use discussing
-what is not going to be. You have been very nice to-day. If you would be
-always nice, as you are to-day, I should soon get well.'</p>
-
-<p>Her pale profile seemed very sharp in the fading twilight, and her
-delicate arms and thin bosom were full of the charm and fascination of
-deciduous things. She turned her face and looked at Hubert. 'You have made
-me very happy. I am content.'</p>
-
-<p>He was afraid to look back at her, lest she should, in her subtle,
-wilful manner, read the thought that was passing in his soul. Even now she
-seemed to read it. She seemed conscious of his pity for her. So little <a
-name="248.png" class="pb"></a> would give her happiness, and that little
-was impossible. His heart was irreparably another's. But though Emily's
-eyes seemed to know all, they seemed to say, 'What matter? I regret
-nothing, only let things remain as they are.' And then her voice said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I think I could sleep a little; happiness has brought me sleep. Don't
-go away. I shall not be asleep long.' She looked at him, and dozed, and
-then fell asleep. Hubert waited till her breathing grew deeper; then he
-laid the hand he held in his by her side, and stole on tiptoe from the
-room.</p>
-
-<p>The strain of the interview had become too intense; the house was
-unbearable. He went into the air. The November sky was drawing into wintry
-night; the grey clouds darkened, clinging round the long plain,
-overshadowing it, blotting out colour, leaving nothing but the severe green
-of the park, and the yellow whirling of dishevelled woods.</p>
-
-<p>'I must,' he said to himself, 'think no more about it. I shall go mad if
-I do. Nature will find her own solution. God grant that it may be a
-merciful one! I can do nothing.' And to escape from useless consideration,
-to release his overwrought brain, he hastened his steps, extending his walk
-through the farthest woods. As he approached the lodge gate he came upon <a
-name="249.png" class="pb"></a> Mrs. Bentley. She stood, her back turned
-from him, leaning on the gate, her thoughts lost in the long darkness of
-autumnal fields and woods.</p>
-
-<p>'Julia!'</p>
-
-<p>'You have left Emily. How did you leave her?'</p>
-
-<p>'She is fast asleep on the sofa. She fell asleep. Then why should I
-remain? The house was unbearable. She went to sleep, saying she felt very
-happy.'</p>
-
-<p>'Really! What induced such a change in her? Did you&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I did not ask her to marry me; but I was able to tell her that I
-was not going to marry you, and that seemed entirely to satisfy her.'</p>
-
-<p>'Did she ask you?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes. And when I told her I was not, she said that that was all she
-wanted to know&mdash;that she would soon get well now. How we human beings
-thrive in each other's unhappiness!'</p>
-
-<p>'Quite true, and we have been reproaching ourselves for our
-selfishness.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, and hers is infinitely greater. She is quite satisfied not to be
-happy herself, so long as she can make sure of our unhappiness. And what is
-so strange is her utter unconsciousness of her own fantastic and hardly
-conceivable selfishness.... It is astonishing!'</p>
-
-<a name="250.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'She is very young, and the young are naturally egotistic.'</p>
-
-<p>'Possibly. Still, it is hardly more agreeable to encounter. Come, let's
-go for a walk; and, above all things, let's talk no more about Emily.'</p>
-
-<p>The roads were greasy, and the hedges were torn and worn with incipient
-winter, and when they dipped the town appeared, a reddish-brown mass in the
-blue landscape. Hubert thought of his play and his love; but not
-separately&mdash;they seemed to him now as one indissoluble, indivisible thing;
-and he told her that he never would be able to write it without her
-assistance. That she might be of use to him in his work was singularly
-sweet to hear, and the thought reached to the end of her heart, causing her
-to smile sadly, and argue vainly, and him to reply querulously. They walked
-for about a mile; and then, wearied with sad expostulation, the
-conversation fell, and at the end of a long silence Julia said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I think we had better turn back.'</p>
-
-<p>The suggestion filled Hubert's heart with rushing pain, and he
-answered&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Why should we return? I cannot go back to that girl. Oh, the miserable
-life we are leading!'</p>
-
-<p>'What can we do? We must go back; we cannot <a name="251.png"
-class="pb"></a> live in a tent by the wayside. We have no tent to set
-up.'</p>
-
-<p>'Come to London, and be my wife.'</p>
-
-<p>'No,' she said; 'that is impossible. Let us not speak of it.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert did not answer; and, turning their faces homeward, they walked
-some way in silence. Suddenly Hubert said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'No; it is impossible. I cannot return. There is no use. I'm at the end
-of my tether. I cannot.'</p>
-
-<p>She looked at him in alarm.</p>
-
-<p>'Hubert,' she said, 'this is folly! I cannot return without you.'</p>
-
-<p>'You ruin my life; you refuse me the only happiness. I'm more wretched
-than I can tell you!'</p>
-
-<p>'And I! Do you think that I'm not wretched?' She raised her face to his;
-her eyes were full of tears. He caught her in his arms, and kissed her. The
-warm touch of her lips, the scent of her face and hair, banished all but
-desire of her.</p>
-
-<p>'You must come with me, Julia. I shall go mad if you don't. I can care
-for no one but you. All my life is in you now. You know I cannot love that
-girl, and we cannot continue in this wretched life. There is no sense in
-it; it is a voluntary, senseless martyrdom!'</p>
-
-<a name="252.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Hubert, do not tempt me to be disloyal to my friend. It is cruel of
-you, for you know I love you. But no, nothing shall tempt me. How can I? We
-do not know what might happen. The shock might kill her. She might do away
-with herself.'</p>
-
-<p>'You must come with me,' said Hubert, now completely lost in his
-passion. 'Nothing will happen. Girls do not do away with themselves; girls
-do not die of broken hearts. Nothing happens in these days. A few more
-tears will be shed, and she will soon become reconciled to what cannot be
-altered. A year or so after, we will marry her to a nice young man, and she
-will settle down a quiet mother of children.'</p>
-
-<p>'Perhaps you are right.'</p>
-
-<p>An empty fly, returning to the town, passed them. The fly-man raised his
-whip.</p>
-
-<p>'Take you to the railway station in ten minutes!'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert spoke quietly; nevertheless there was a strange nervousness in
-his eyes when he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Fate comes to help me; she offers us the means of escape. You will not
-refuse, Julia?'</p>
-
-<p>Her upraised face was full of doubt and pain, and she was perplexed by
-the fly-man's dull eyes, his starved horse, his ramshackle vehicle, the wet
-road, the leaden sky. It was one of those moments when the <a
-name="253.png" class="pb"></a> familiar appears strange and grotesque.
-Then, gathering all her resolution, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'No, no; it is impossible! Come back, come back.'</p>
-
-<p>He caught her arm: quietly and firmly he led her across the road. 'You
-must listen to me.... We are about to take a decisive step. Are you sure
-that&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no, Hubert, I cannot; let us return home.'</p>
-
-<p>'I go back to Ashwood! If I did, I should commit suicide.'</p>
-
-<p>'Don't speak like that.... Where will you go?'</p>
-
-<p>'I shall travel.... I shall visit Italy and Greece.... I shall live
-abroad.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are not serious?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, I am, Julia. That cab may not take both, but it certainly will
-take one of us away from Ashwood, and for ever.'</p>
-
-<p>'Take you to Southwater, sir&mdash;take you to the station in ten minutes,'
-said the fly-man, pulling in his horse. A zig-zag fugitive thought passed:
-why did the fly-man speak of taking them to the station? How was it that he
-knew where they wanted to go? They stopped and wondered. The poor horse's
-bones stood out in strange projections, the round-shouldered little <a
-name="254.png" class="pb"></a> fly-man sat grinning on his box, showing
-three long yellow fangs. The vehicle, the horse, and the man, his arm
-raised in questioning gesture, appeared in strange silhouette upon the grey
-clouds, assuming portentous aspect in their tremulous and excited
-imaginations. 'Take you to Southwater in ten minutes!' The voice of the
-fly-man sounded hard, grating, and derisive in their ears.</p>
-
-<p>He had stopped in the middle of the road, and they walked slowly past,
-through a great puddle, which drenched their feet.</p>
-
-<p>'Get in, Julia. Shall I open the door?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no; think of Emily. I cannot, Hubert,&mdash;I cannot; it would kill
-her.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused, and in a long silence they wondered if the
-fly-man had heard. Then they walked several yards listening to the tramp of
-the hoofs, and then they heard the fly-man strike his horse with the whip.
-The animal shuffled into a sort of trot, and as the carriage passed them
-the fly-man again raised his arm and again repeated the same phrase, 'Drive
-you to the station in ten minutes!' The carriage was her temptation, and
-Julia hoped the man would linger no longer. For the promise she had given
-to Emily lay like a red-hot coal upon her heart; its fumes rose to <a
-name="255.png" class="pb"></a> her head, and there were times when she
-thought they would choke her, and she grew so sick with the pain of
-self-denial that she could have thrown herself down in the wet grass on the
-roadside, and laid her face on the cold earth for relief. Would nothing
-happen? What madness! Night was coming on, and still they followed the road
-to Southwater. Rain fell in heavy drops.</p>
-
-<p>'We shall get wet,' she murmured, as if she were answering the fly-man,
-who had said again, 'Drive you to the station in ten minutes!' She hated
-the man for his persistency.</p>
-
-<p>'Say you will come with me!' Hubert whispered; and all the while the
-rain came down heavier.</p>
-
-<p>'No, no, Hubert.... I cannot; I promised Emily that I never would. I am
-going back.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then we must say good-bye. I will not go back.'</p>
-
-<p>'You don't mean it. You don't really intend me to go back to Emily and
-tell her?... She will not believe me; she will think I have sent you away
-to gain my own end. Hubert, you mustn't leave me ... and in all this wet.
-See how it rains! I shall never be able to get home alone.'</p>
-
-<p>'I will drive you on as far as the lodge-gate; farther than the lodge I
-will not go. Nothing in the world shall tempt me to pass it.'</p>
-
-<a name="256.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>At a sign from Hubert the little fly-man scrambled down from his box. He
-was a little old man, almost hunchbacked, with small mud-coloured eyes and
-a fringe of white beard about his sallow, discoloured face. He was dressed
-in a pale yellow jacket and waistcoat, and they both noticed that his
-crooked little legs were covered with a pair of pepper-and-salt trousers.
-They felt sure he must have overheard a large part of their conversation,
-for as he opened the carriage door he grinned, showing his three yellow
-fangs.... His appearance was not encouraging. Julia wished he were
-different, and then she looked at Hubert. She longed to throw herself into
-his arms and weep. But at that moment the heavens seemed to open, and the
-rain came down like a torrent, thick and fast, splashing all along the road
-in a million splashes.</p>
-
-<p>'Horrible weather, sir; shan't be long a-takin' you to Southwater. What
-part of the town be yer going to&mdash;the railway station?'</p>
-
-<p>Julia still hesitated. The rain beat on their faces, and when some
-chilling drops rolled down her neck she instinctively sought shelter in the
-carriage.</p>
-
-<p>'Drive me to the station as fast as you can. Catch the half-past five to
-London, and I'll give you five shillings.'</p>
-
-<a name="257.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>The leather thong sounded on the starved animal's hide, the crazy
-vehicle rocked from side to side, and the wet country almost disappeared in
-the darkness. Hedges and fields swept past them in faintest outline, here
-and there a blurred mass, which they recognised as a farm building. His arm
-was about her, and she heard him murmur over and over again&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Dearest Julia, you are what I love best in the world.'</p>
-
-<p>The words thrilled her a little, but all the while she saw Emily's eyes
-and heard her voice.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert, however, was full of happiness&mdash;the sweet happiness of the
-quiet, docile creature that has at last obtained what it loves.</p>
-
-<a name="258.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XIX</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Emily</span> awoke shivering; the fire had gone
-out, the room was in darkness, and the house seemed strange and lonely. She
-rang the bell, and asked the servant if he had seen Mr. Price. Mr. Price
-had gone out late in the afternoon, and had not come in. Where was Mrs.
-Bentley? Mrs. Bentley had gone out earlier in the afternoon, and had not
-come in.</p>
-
-<p>She suspected the truth at once. They had gone to London to be married.
-The servant lighted a candle, made up the fire, and asked if she would wait
-dinner. Emily made no answer, but sat still, her eyes fixed, looking into
-space. The man lingered at the door. At that moment her little dog bounded
-into the room, and, in a paroxysm of delight, jumped on his mistress's lap.
-She took him in her arms and kissed him, and this somewhat reassured the
-alarmed servant, who then thought it was no more than one of Miss Emily's
-queer ways. Dandy licked his mistress's face, and rubbed his rough head
-against her shoulder. He <a name="259.png" class="pb"></a> seemed more than
-usually affectionate that evening. Suddenly she caught him up in her arms,
-and kissed him passionately. 'Not even for your sake, dearest Dandy, can I
-bear with it any longer! We are all very selfish, and it is selfish of me
-to leave you, but I cannot help it.' Then a doubt crossed her mind, and she
-raised her head and listened to it. It seemed difficult to believe that he
-had told her a falsehood&mdash;cruel, wicked falsehood&mdash;he who had been so kind.
-And yet&mdash;&mdash; Ah! yes, she knew well enough that it was all true; something
-told her so. The lancinating pain of doubt passed away, and she remained
-thinking of the impossibility of bearing any longer with the life.</p>
-
-<p>An hour passed, and the servant came with the news that Mr. Price and
-Mrs. Bentley had gone to London; they had taken the half-past five train.
-'Yes,' she said, 'I know they have.' Her voice was calm. There was a
-strange hollow ring in it, and the servant wondered. A few minutes after,
-dinner was announced; and to escape observation and comment she went into
-the dining-room, tasted the soup, and took a slice of mutton on her plate.
-She could not eat it. She gave it to Dandy. It was the last time she should
-feed him. How hungry he was! She <a name="260.png" class="pb"></a> hoped he
-would not care to eat it; he would not if he knew she was going to leave
-him.</p>
-
-<p>In the drawing-room he insisted on being nursed; and alone, amid the
-faded furniture, watched over by the old portraits, her pale face fixed and
-her pale hands clasping her beloved dog, she sat thinking, brooding over
-the unhappiness, the incurable unhappiness, of her little life. She was
-absorbed in self, and did not rail against Hubert, or even Julia. Their
-personalities had somehow dropped out of her mind, and merely represented
-forces against which she found herself unable any longer to contend. Nor
-was she surprised at what had happened. There had always been in her some
-prescience of her fate. She and unhappiness had always seemed so
-inseparable, that she had never found it difficult to believe that this
-last misfortune would befall her. She had thought it over, and had decided
-that it would be unendurable to live any longer, and had borne many a
-terrible insomnia so that she might collect sufficient chloral to take her
-out of her misery; and now, as she sat thinking, she remembered that she
-had never, never been happy. Oh! the miserable evenings she used to spend,
-when a child, between her father and mother, who could not agree&mdash;why, she
-never understood. But she used <a name="261.png" class="pb"></a> to have to
-listen to her mother addressing insulting speeches to her father in a calm,
-even voice that nothing could alter; and, though both were dead and years
-divided her from that time, the memory survived, and she could see it all
-again&mdash;that room, the very paper on the wall, and her father being
-gradually worked up into a frenzy.</p>
-
-<p>When she was left an orphan, Mr. Burnett had adopted her, and she
-remembered the joy of coming to Ashwood. She had thought to find happiness
-there; but there, as at home, fate had gone against her, and she was hardly
-eighteen when Mr. Burnett had asked her to marry him. She had loved that
-old man, but he had not loved her; for when she had refused to marry him he
-had broken all his promises and left her penniless, careless of what might
-become of her. Then she had given her whole heart to Julia, and Julia, too,
-had deceived her. And had she not loved Hubert?&mdash;no one would ever know how
-much; she did not know herself,&mdash;and had he not lied to her? Oh, it was
-very cruel to deceive a poor little girl in this heartless way! There was
-no heart in the world, that was it&mdash;and she was all heart; and her heart
-had been trampled on ever since she could remember. And when they came back
-they would revenge themselves <a name="262.png" class="pb"></a> upon
-her&mdash;insult her with their happiness; perhaps insist on sending her
-away.</p>
-
-<p>Dandy drowsed on her lap. The servant brought in the tea, and when he
-returned to the kitchen he said he had never seen any one look so
-ghost-like as Miss Emily. The clock ticked loudly in the silence of the old
-room, the hands moving slowly towards ten. She waited for the hour to
-strike; it was then that she usually went to bed. Her thoughts moved as in
-a nightmare; and paramount in this chaotic mass of sensation was an acute
-sense of the deception that had been practised on her; with the
-consciousness, now firm and unalterable, that it had become impossible for
-her to live. When the clock struck she got up from her chair, and the
-movement seemed to react on her brain; her thoughts unclouded, and she went
-up-stairs thinking clearly of her love of this old house. The old gentleman
-in the red coat, his hand on his sword, looked on her benignly; and the
-lady playing the spinet smiled as sweetly as was her wont. Emily held up
-the candle to the picture of the windmill. She had always loved that
-picture, and the sad thought came that she should never see it again.
-Dandy, who had galloped up-stairs, stood looking through the banisters,
-wagging his tail.</p>
-
-<a name="263.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>The moment she got into her room she wrote the following note: 'I have
-taken an overdose of chloral. My life was too miserable to be borne any
-longer. I forgive those who have caused my unhappiness, and I hope they
-will forgive me any unhappiness I have caused them.' They were nothing to
-her now; they were beyond her hate, and the only pang she felt was parting
-with her beloved Dandy. There he stood looking at her, standing on the edge
-of the bed, waiting for her to cover him up and put him to sleep in his own
-corner. 'Yes, Dandy, in a moment, dear&mdash;have patience.' She looked round
-the little room, and, remembering all that she had suffered there, thought
-that the walls must be saturated with grief, like a sponge.</p>
-
-<p>It was a common thing at that time for her to stand before the glass and
-address such words as these to herself: 'My poor girl, how I pity you, how
-I pity you!' And now, looking at herself very sadly, she said, 'My poor
-girl, I shall never pity you any more!' Having hung up her dress, she
-fetched a chair and took various doses of chloral out of the hollow top of
-her wardrobe, where she had hidden things all her life&mdash;sweets, novels,
-fireworks. They more than half-filled the tumbler; and, looking at the <a
-name="264.png" class="pb"></a> sticky, white liquid, she thought with
-repugnance of drinking so much of it. But, wanting to make quite sure of
-death, she resolved to take it all, and she undressed quickly. She was very
-cold when she got into bed. Then a thought struck her, and she got out of
-bed to add a postscript to her letter. 'I have only one request to make. I
-hope Dandy will always be taken care of.' Surprised that she had not
-wrapped him up and told him he was to go to sleep, the dog stood on the
-edge of the bed, watching her so earnestly that she wondered if he knew
-what she was going to do. 'No, you don't know, dear&mdash;do you? If you did,
-you wouldn't let me do it; you'd bark the house down, I know you would, my
-own darling.' Clasping him to her breast, she smothered him with kisses,
-then put him away in his corner, covering him over for the night.</p>
-
-<p>She felt neither grief nor fear. Through much suffering, thought and
-sensation were, to a great extent, dead in her; and, in a sort of emotive
-numbness, she laid her candlestick in its usual place on the chair by her
-bedside; and, sitting up in bed, her night-dress carefully buttoned,
-holding the tumbler half-filled with chloral, she tried to take a
-dispassionate survey of her life. She thought of what she had <a
-name="265.png" class="pb"></a> endured, and what she would have to endure
-if she did not take it. Then she felt she must go, and without hesitation
-drank off the chloral. She placed the tumbler by the candlestick, and lay
-down, remembering vaguely that a long time ago she had decided that suicide
-was not wrong in itself. The last thing she remembered was the clock
-striking eleven.</p>
-
-<p>For half an hour she slept like stone. Then her eyes opened, and they
-told of sickness now in motion within her. And, strangely enough, through
-the overpowering nausea rising from her stomach to her brain, the thought
-that she was not going to die appeared perfectly clear, and with it a sense
-of disappointment; she would have to begin it all over again. It was with
-great difficulty that she struck a match and lighted a candle. It seemed
-impossible to get up. At last she managed to slip her legs out of bed, and
-found she could stand, and through the various assaults of retching she
-thought of the letter: it must be destroyed; and, leaning in the corner
-against the wall and the wardrobe, she tried to recover herself. A dull,
-deep sleep was pressing on her brain, and she thought she would never be
-able to cross the room to where the letter was. Dandy looked out of his
-rug; she caught sight of his bright eyes.</p>
-
-<a name="266.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>On cold and shaky feet she attempted to make her way towards the letter;
-but the room heaved up at her, and, fearing she should fall, and knowing if
-she did that she would not be able to regain her feet, she clung to the
-toilette-table. She must destroy that letter: if it were found, they would
-watch her; and, however impossible her life might become, she would not be
-able to escape from it. This consideration gave her strength for a final
-effort. She tore the letter into very small pieces, and then, clinging to a
-chair, strove to grasp the rail of the bed; but the bed rolled worse than
-any ship. Making a supreme effort, she got in; and then, neither dreams nor
-waking thoughts, but oblivion complete. Hours and hours passed, and when
-she opened her eyes her maid stood over the bed, looking at her.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, miss, you looked so tired and ill that I didn't wake you. You do
-seem poorly, miss. It is nearly two o'clock. Should you like to sleep a
-little longer, or shall I bring you up some breakfast?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no, no, thank you. I couldn't touch anything. I'm feeling wretched;
-but I'll get up.'</p>
-
-<p>The maid tried to dissuade her; but Emily got out of bed, and allowed
-herself to be dressed. She was very weak&mdash;so weak that she could hardly
-stand up <a name="267.png" class="pb"></a> at the washstand; and the maid
-had to sponge her face and neck. But when she had drunk a cup of tea and
-eaten a little piece of toast, she said she felt better, and was able to
-walk into the drawing-room. She thought no more of death, nor of her
-troubles; thought drowned in her; and in a passive, torpid state she sat
-looking into the fire till dinner-time, hardly caring to bestow a casual
-caress on Dandy, who seemed conscious of his mistress's neglect, for, in
-his sly, coaxing way, he sometimes came and rubbed himself against her
-feet. She went into the dining-room, and the servant was glad to see that
-she finished her soup, and, though she hardly tasted it, she finished a
-wing of a chicken, and also the glass of wine which the man pressed upon
-her. Half an hour after, when he brought out the tea, he found her sitting
-on her habitual chair nursing her dog, and staring into the fire so
-drearily that her look frightened him, and he hesitated before he gave her
-the letter which had just come up from the town; but it was marked
-'Immediate.'</p>
-
-<p>When he left the room she opened it. It was from Mrs. Bentley:&mdash;</p>
-
-<blockquote>
-
-<p>'<span class="small-caps">Dearest Emily</span>,&mdash;I know that Hubert told
-you that he was not going to marry me. He thought he was not, <a
-name="268.png" class="pb"></a> for I had refused to marry him; but a short
-time after we met in the park quite accidentally, and&mdash;well, fate took the
-matter out of our hands, and we are to be married to-morrow. Hubert insists
-on going to Italy, and I believe we shall remain there two months. We have
-made arrangements for your aunt to live with you until we come back; and
-when we do come back, I hope all the little unpleasantnesses which have
-marred our friendship for this last month or two will be forgotten. So far
-as I am concerned, nothing shall be left undone to make you happy. Your
-will shall be law at Ashwood so long as I am there. If you would like to
-join us in Italy, you have only to say the word. We shall be delighted to
-have you.'</p> </blockquote>
-
-<p>Emily could read no more. 'Join them in Italy!' She dashed the letter
-into the fire, and an intense hatred of them both pierced her heart and
-brain. It was the kiss of Judas. Oh, those hateful, lying words! To live
-here with her aunt until they came back, to wait here quietly until she
-returned in triumph with him&mdash;him who had been all the world to her. Oh no;
-that was not possible. Death, death&mdash;escape she must. But how? She had no
-more chloral. Suddenly she thought of the lake. 'Yes, yes; the lake, the
-lake!' And then a keen, swift, passionate longing for death, such as she
-had not felt at all the night before, came upon her. There was the
-knowledge <a name="269.png" class="pb"></a> too that by killing herself she
-would revenge herself on those who had killed her. She was just conscious
-that her suicide would have this effect, but hardly a trace of such
-intention appeared in the letter she wrote; it was as melancholy and as
-brief as the letter she had torn up, and ended, like it, with a request
-that Dandy should be well looked after. She had only just directed the
-envelope when she heard the servant coming to take away the tea-things. She
-concealed the letter; and when his steps died away in the corridor and the
-house-door closed, she knew she could slip out unobserved. Instinctively
-she thought of her hat and jacket, and, without a shudder, remembered she
-would not need them. She sped down the pathway through the shadow of the
-firs.</p>
-
-<p>It was one of those warm nights of winter when a sulphur-coloured sky
-hangs like a blanket behind the wet, dishevelled woods; and, though there
-was neither moon nor star, the night was strangely clear, and the shadow of
-the bridge was distinct in the water. When she approached the brink the
-swans moved slowly away. They reminded her of the cold; but the black
-obsession of death was upon her; and, hastening her steps, she threw
-herself forward. She fell into shallow water and regained her feet, and for
-<a name="270.png" class="pb"></a> a moment it seemed uncertain if she would
-wade to the bank or fling herself into a deeper place. Suddenly she sank,
-the water rising to her shoulders. She was lifted off her feet. A faint
-struggle, a faint cry, and then nothing&mdash;nothing but the whiteness of the
-swans moving through the sultry night slowly towards the island.</p>
-
-<a name="271.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XX</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Its</span> rich, inanimate air proclaimed the
-room to be an expensive bedroom in a first-class London hotel. Interest in
-the newly-married couple, who were to occupy the room, prompted the
-servants to see that nothing was forgotten; and as they lingered steps were
-heard in the passage, and Hubert and Julia entered. The maid-servants stood
-aside to let them pass, and one inquired if madame wanted anything, so that
-her eyes might be gratified with a last inquisition of the happy pair.</p>
-
-<p>'How wonderful! oh, how wonderful! I don't think I ever saw any one act
-before like that&mdash;did you?'</p>
-
-<p>'She certainly had three or four moments that could not be surpassed.
-Her entrance in the sleep-walking scene&mdash;what vague horror! what pale
-presentiment! how she filled the stage! nothing seemed to exist but
-she.'</p>
-
-<p>'And Ford; what did you think of Ford's Macbeth?'</p>
-
-<a name="272.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Very good. Everything he does is good. Talent; but the other has
-genius.'</p>
-
-<p>'I shall never forget this evening. What an awful tragedy!'</p>
-
-<p>'Perhaps I should have taken you to see something more cheerful; but I
-wanted to see Miss Massey play Lady Macbeth. But let us talk of something
-else. Splendid fire&mdash;is it not?'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert threw off his overcoat, the movement attracted Julia's attention,
-and it startled her to see how old he seemed to have grown. She noticed as
-she had not noticed before the grey in his beard and the pathetic weary
-look that haunted his eyes. And she understood in that instant that the
-look his face wore was the look of those who have failed in their
-vocation.</p>
-
-<p>And at that very moment he was wondering if he really loved her, if his
-marriage were a mistake. The passion he had felt when walking with her on
-the wet country road he felt no longer, only an undefinable sadness and a
-weariness which he could not understand. He looked at his wife, and fearing
-that she divined his thoughts, he kissed her. She returned his kiss coldly
-and he wondered if she loved him. He thought that it was improbable that
-she did. Why should she love him? He <a name="273.png" class="pb"></a> had
-never loved any one. He had never inspired love in any one, except perhaps
-Emily.</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder if you really wished to be married,' she said.</p>
-
-<p>'I always wished to be married,' he replied. 'I hated the Bohemianism I was forced to live in. I longed for a
-home, for a wife.'</p>
-
-<p>'You were very poor once?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes: I've lived on tenpence and a shilling a day. I've worked in the
-docks as a labourer. I went down there hoping to get a clerkship on board
-one of the Transatlantic steamers. I had had enough of England, and thought
-of seeking fortune elsewhere.'</p>
-
-<p>'I can hardly believe you worked as a labourer in the docks.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; I did. I saw some men going to work, and I joined them. I don't
-think I thought much about it at the time. A very little misery rubs all
-the psychology out of us, and we return more easily than one thinks to the
-animal.'</p>
-
-<p>'And then?'</p>
-
-<p>'At the end of a week the work began to tell upon me, and I drifted back
-in search of my manuscript.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you must have been in a dreadful condition; your clothes&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<a name="274.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Ah! thereby hangs a tale. An actress lived in one of the houses I had
-been lodging in.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, tell me about her! This is getting very interesting.'</p>
-
-<p>Then passing his arm round his wife's neck, and with her sweet blonde
-face looking upon him, and the insinuating warmth of the fire about them,
-he told her the story of his failure.</p>
-
-<p>'But,' she said, her voice trembling, 'you would not have committed
-suicide?'</p>
-
-<p>'No man knows beforehand whether he will commit suicide. I can only say
-that every other issue was closed.'</p>
-
-<p>At the end of a long silence Julia said, 'I wish you hadn't spoken about
-suicide. I cannot but think of Emily. If she were to make away with
-herself! The very possibility turns my heart to ice. What should I do&mdash;what
-should we do? I ought never to have given way; we were both abominably
-selfish. I can see that poor girl sitting alone in that house grieving her
-heart out.'</p>
-
-<p>'You think that we ought never to have given way!'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose we ought not. I tried very hard, you know I did.... But do
-you regret?' she said, looking at him suddenly.</p>
-
-<a name="275.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'No; I don't regret, but I wish it had happened otherwise.'</p>
-
-<p>'You don't fear anything. Nothing will happen. What can happen?'</p>
-
-<p>'The most terrible things often happen&mdash;have happened.'</p>
-
-<p>'Emily may have been fond of me&mdash;I think she was; but it was no more
-than the hysterical caprice of a young girl. Besides, people do not die for
-love; and I assure you it will be all right. This is not a time for gloomy
-thoughts.'</p>
-
-<p>'I'll try not to think of her. Well, what were we talking about? I know:
-about the actress who lived in 17 Fitzroy Street. Tell me about her.'</p>
-
-<p>'She was a real good girl. If she hadn't lent me that five shillings, I
-don't know where I should be now.'</p>
-
-<p>'Were you very fond of her?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; there never was anything of that sort between us. We were merely
-friends.'</p>
-
-<p>'And what has become of this actress?'</p>
-
-<p>'You saw her to-night?'</p>
-
-<p>'Was she acting in the piece we saw to-night?'</p>
-
-<p>'It was she who played Lady Macbeth.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are joking.'</p>
-
-<a name="276.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'No, I'm not. I always knew she had genius, and they have found it out;
-but I must say they have taken their time about it.'</p>
-
-<p>'How wonderful! she has succeeded!'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, <i>she</i> has succeeded!'</p>
-
-<p>'And she is really the girl you intended to play Lady Hayward?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; and I hope she will play the part one of these days.'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course, she is just the woman for it. What a splendid success she
-has had! All London is talking about her.'</p>
-
-<p>'And I remember when Ford refused to cast her for the adventuress in
-<i>Divorce</i>. If he had, there is no doubt she would have carried the
-piece through. Life is but a bundle of chances; she has succeeded, whatever
-that may mean.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you will let her have the part of Lady Hayward?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, of course&mdash;that is to say, if&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Why "if"?'</p>
-
-<p>'My thoughts are with you, dear; literature seems to have passed out of
-sight.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you must not sacrifice your talent in worship of me. I shall not
-allow you. For my sake, if not <a name="277.png" class="pb"></a> for hers,
-you must finish that play. I want you to be famous. I should be for ever
-miserable if my love proved a upas-tree.'</p>
-
-<p>'A upas-tree! It will be you who will help me; it will be your presence
-that will help me to write my play. I was always vaguely conscious that you
-were a necessary element in my life; but I did not wake up to any knowledge
-of it until that day&mdash;do you remember?&mdash;when you came into my study to ask
-me what fish I'd like for dinner, and I begged of you to allow me to read
-to you that second act. It is that second act that stops me.'</p>
-
-<p>'I thought you had written the second act to your satisfaction. You said
-that after the talk we had that afternoon you wrote for three hours without
-stopping, and that you had never done better work.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, I wrote a great deal; but on reading it over I found that&mdash;I don't
-mean to say that none of it will stand; some still seems to me to be all
-right, but a great deal will require alteration.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation fell. At the end of a long silence Hubert said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'What are you thinking of, dearest?'</p>
-
-<p>'I was thinking that supposing you were mistaken&mdash;if I failed to help
-you in your work.'</p>
-
-<a name="278.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'And I never succeeded in writing my play?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I don't mean that. Of course you will write your play; all you have
-to do is to be less critical.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, I know&mdash;I have heard that before; but, unfortunately, we cannot
-change ourselves. I'll either carry my play through completely, realise my
-ideal, or&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Remain for ever unsatisfied?'</p>
-
-<p>'Whether I write it or no, I shall be happy in your love.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, yes; let us be happy.'</p>
-
-<p>They looked at each other. He did not speak, but his thought said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'There is no happiness on earth for him who has not accomplished his
-task.'</p>
-
-<p>'Shall we be happy? I wonder. We have both suffered,' she said, 'we are
-both tired of suffering, and it is only right that we should be happy.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, we shall be happy, I will be happy. It shall be my pleasure to
-attend to you, to give you all your desire. But you said just now that you
-had suffered. I have told you my past. Tell me yours. I know nothing except
-that you were unhappily married.'</p>
-
-<p>'There is little else to know; a woman's life is not adventurous, like a
-man's. I have not known <a name="279.png" class="pb"></a> the excitement of
-"first nights," nor the striving and the craving for an artistic ideal. My
-life has been essentially a woman's life,&mdash;suppression of self and
-monotonous duty, varied by heart-breaking misfortune. I married when I was
-very young; before I had even begun to think about life I found&mdash;&mdash; But why
-distress these hours with painful memories?'</p>
-
-<p>'It is pleasant to look back on the troubles we have passed
-through.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, I learnt in one year the meaning of three terrible
-words&mdash;poverty, neglect, and cruelty. In the second year of my marriage my
-husband died of drink, and I was left a widow at twenty, entirely
-penniless. I went to live with my sister, and she was so poor that I had to
-support myself by giving music-lessons. You think you know the meaning of
-poverty: you may; but you do not know what a young woman who wants to earn
-her bread honestly has to put up with, trudging through wet and cold, mile
-after mile, to give a lesson, paid for at the rate of one-and-sixpence or
-two shillings an hour.'</p>
-
-<p>Julia took her eyes from her husband's face, and looked dreamily into
-the fire. Then, raising her face from the flame, she looked around with the
-air of one seeking for some topic of conversation. At that <a
-name="280.png" class="pb"></a> moment she caught sight of the corner of a
-letter lying on the mantelpiece. Reaching forth her hand, she took it. It
-was addressed to her husband.</p>
-
-<p>'Here is a letter for you, Hubert.... Why, it comes from Ashwood. Yes,
-and it is in the hand-writing of one of the servants. Oh, it is Black's
-writing! It may be about Emily. Something may have happened to her. Open it
-quickly.'</p>
-
-<p>'That is not probable. Nothing can have happened to her.'</p>
-
-<p>'Look and see. Be quick!'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert opened the letter, and he had not read three lines when Julia's
-face caught expression from his, which had become overcast.</p>
-
-<p>'It is bad news, I know. Something has happened. What is it? Don't keep
-me waiting. The suspense is worse than the truth.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is very awful, Julia. Don't give way.'</p>
-
-<p>'Tell me what it is. Is she dead?</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; she is dead.' Julia got up from her husband's knees and stood by
-the mantelpiece, leaning upon it. 'It is more than mere death.'</p>
-
-<p>'What do you mean? She killed herself&mdash;is that it?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; she drowned herself the night before last in the lake.'</p>
-
-<a name="281.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Oh, it is too horrible! Then we have murdered her. Our unpardonable
-selfishness! I cannot bear it!' Her eyes closed and her lips trembled.
-Hubert caught her in his arms, laid her on the chair, and, fetching some
-water in a tumbler, sprinkled her face; then he held it to her lips; she
-drank a little, and revived. 'I'm not going to faint. Tell me&mdash;tell me when
-the unfortunate child&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'They don't know exactly. She was in the drawing-room at tea-time, and
-the drawing-room was empty when Black went round three-quarters of an hour
-after to lock up. He thought she had gone to her room. It was the gardener
-who brought in the news in the morning about nine.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, good God!'</p>
-
-<p>'Black says he noticed that she looked very depressed the day before,
-but he thought she was looking better when he brought in the tea.'</p>
-
-<p>'It was then she got my letter. Does Black say anything about giving her
-a letter?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, that is to say&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I knew it! I knew it!' said Julia; and her eyes were wild with grief,
-and she rocked herself to and fro. 'It was that letter that drove her to
-it. It was most ill-advised. I told you so. You should have <a
-name="282.png" class="pb"></a> written. She would have borne the news
-better had it come from you. My instinct told me so, but I let myself be
-persuaded. I told you how it would happen. I told you. You can't say I
-didn't. Oh! why did you persuade me&mdash;why&mdash;why&mdash;why?'</p>
-
-<p>'Julia dear, we are not responsible. We were in nowise bound to
-sacrifice our happiness to her&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Don't say a word! I say we were bound. Life can never be the same to me
-again.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert did not answer. Nothing he could say would be of the slightest
-avail, and he feared to say anything that might draw from her expressions
-which she would afterwards regret. He had never seen her moved like this,
-nor did he believe her capable of such agitation, and the contrast of her
-present with her usual demeanour made it the more impressive.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh,' she said, leaning forward and looking at him fixedly, 'take this
-nightmare off my brain, or I shall go mad! It isn't true; it cannot be
-true. But&mdash;oh! yes, it's true enough.'</p>
-
-<p>'Like you, Julia, I am overwhelmed; but we can do nothing.'</p>
-
-<p>'Do nothing!' she cried; 'do nothing! We can do nothing but pray for
-her&mdash;we who sacrificed her.' <a name="283.png" class="pb"></a> And she
-slipped on her knees and burst into a passionate fit of weeping.</p>
-
-<p>'The best thing that could have happened,' thought Hubert; and his
-thought said, clearly and precisely, 'Yes; it is awful, shocking, cruel
-beyond measure!'</p>
-
-<p>The fire was sinking, and he built it up quietly, ashamed of this proof
-of his regard for physical comfort, and hoping it would pass unnoticed. His
-pain expressed itself less vehemently than Julia's; but for all that his
-mind ached. He remembered how he had taken everything from her&mdash;fortune,
-happiness, and now life itself. It was an appalling tragedy&mdash;one of those
-senseless cruelties which we find nature constantly inventing. A thought
-revealed an unexpected analogy between him and his victim. In both lives
-there had been a supreme desire, and both had failed. 'Hers was the better
-part,' he said bitterly. 'Those whose souls are burdened with desire that
-may not be gratified had better fling the load aside. They are fools who
-carry it on to the end.... If it were not for Julia&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>Then he sought to determine what were his exact feelings. He knew he was
-infinitely sorry for poor Emily; but he could not stir himself into a
-paroxysm <a name="284.png" class="pb"></a> of grief, and, ashamed of his
-inability to express his feelings, he looked at Julia, who still wept.</p>
-
-<p>'No doubt,' he thought, 'women have keener feelings than we have.'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment Julia got up from her knees. She had brushed away her
-tears. Her face was shaken with grief.</p>
-
-<p>'My heart is breaking,' she said. 'This is too cruel&mdash;too cruel! And on
-my wedding night.'</p>
-
-<p>Their eyes met; and, divining each other's thought, each felt ashamed,
-and Julia said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, what am I saying? This dreadful selfishness, from which we cannot
-escape, that is with us even in such a moment as this! That poor child gone
-to her death, and yet amid it all we must think of ourselves.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Julia, we cannot escape from our human nature; but, for all
-that, our grief is sincere. We can do nothing. Do not grieve like
-that.'</p>
-
-<p>'And why not? She was my best friend. How have I repaid her? Alas! as
-woman always repays woman for kindness done. The old story. I cannot
-forgive myself. No, no! do not kiss me! I cannot bear it. Leave me. I can
-see nothing but Emily's reproachful face.' She covered her face in her
-hands and sobbed again.</p>
-
-<a name="285.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>The same scenes repeated themselves over and over again. The same fits
-of passionate grief; the same moment of calm, when words impregnated with
-self dropped from their lips. The same nervous sense that something of the
-dead girl stood between them. And still they sat by the fire, weary with
-sorrow, recrimination, long regret, and pain. They could grieve no more;
-and before dawn sleep pressed upon their eyelids, and at the end of a long
-silence he dozed&mdash;a pale, transparent sleep, through which the realities of
-life appeared almost as plainly as before. Suddenly he awoke, and he
-shivered in the chill room. The fire was sinking; dawn divided the
-window-curtains. He looked at his wife. She seemed to him very beautiful as
-she slept, her face turned a little on one side, and again he asked himself
-if he loved her. Then, going to the window, he drew the curtains softly, so
-as not to awaken her; and as he stood watching a thin discoloured day
-breaking over the roofs, it again seemed to him that Emily's suicide was
-the better part. 'Those who do not perform their task in life are never
-happy.' The words drilled themselves into his brain with relentless
-insistency. He felt a terrible emptiness within him which he could not
-fill. He looked at his wife and quailed a little <a name="286.png"
-class="pb"></a> at the thought that had suddenly come upon him. She was
-something like himself&mdash;that was why he had married her. We are attracted
-by what is like ourselves. Emily's passion might have stirred him. Now he
-would have to settle down to live with Julia, and their similar natures
-would grow more and more like one another. Then, turning on his thoughts,
-he dismissed them. They were the morbid feverish fancies of an exceptional,
-of a terrible night. He opened the window quietly so as not to awaken his
-wife. And in the melancholy greyness of the dawn he looked down into the
-street and wondered what the end would be.</p>
-
-<p>He did not think that he would live long. Disappointed men&mdash;those who
-have failed in their ambition&mdash;do not live to make old bones. There were
-men like him in every profession&mdash;the arts are crowded with them. He had
-met barristers and soldiers and clergy-men, just like himself. One hears of
-their deaths&mdash;failure of the heart's action, paralysis of the brain, a
-hundred other medical causes&mdash;but the real cause is, lack of
-appreciation.</p>
-
-<p>He would hang on for another few years, no doubt; during that time he
-must try to make his wife happy. <a name="287.png" class="pb"></a> His duty
-was now to be a good husband, at all events, there was that.</p>
-
-<p>His wife lay asleep in the arm-chair, and fearing she might catch cold,
-he came into the room closing the window very gently behind him.</p>
-
-<p>THE END</p>
-
-<p>Printed by T. and A. <span class="small-caps">Constable</span>, printers
-to Her Majesty at the Edinburgh University Press.</p>
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-<pre>
-
-
-
-
-
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-The Project Gutenberg eBook, Vain Fortune, by George Moore
-
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
-almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
-re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
-with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
-
-
-
-
-
-Title: Vain Fortune
-
-Author: George Moore
-
-Release Date: February 26, 2004 [eBook #11303]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: US-ASCII
-
-
-***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK VAIN FORTUNE***
-
-
-
-[Illustration: "She slipped on her knees, and burst into a passionate fit
-of weeping."]
-
-Vain Fortune
-
-A Novel
-
-By
-
-George Moore
-
-_With Five Illustrations By__Maurice Greiffenhagen_
-
-New Edition
-
-Completely Revised
-
-London: Walter Scott, Ltd. Paternoster Square
-
-1895
-
-Edinburgh: T. and A. Constable, Printers to Her Majesty
-
-
-
-
-Prefatory Note
-
-
-I hope it will not seem presumptuous to ask my critics to treat this new
-edition of _Vain Fortune_ as a new book: for it is a new book. The first
-edition was kindly noticed, but it attracted little attention, and very
-rightly, for the story as told therein was thin and insipid; and when
-Messrs. Scribner proposed to print the book in America, I stipulated that I
-should be allowed to rewrite it. They consented, and I began the story with
-Emily Watson, making her the principal character instead of Hubert Price.
-Some months after I received a letter from Madam Couperus, offering to
-translate the English edition into Dutch. I sent her the American edition,
-and asked her which she would prefer to translate from. Madam Couperus
-replied that many things in the English edition, which she would like to
-retain, had been omitted from the American edition, that the hundred or
-more pages which I had written for the American edition seemed to her
-equally worthy of retention.
-
-She pointed out that, without the alteration of a sentence, the two
-versions could be combined. The idea had not occurred to me; I saw,
-however, that what she proposed was not only feasible but advantageous. I
-wrote, therefore, giving her the required permission, and thanking her for
-a suggestion which I should avail myself of when the time came for a new
-English edition.
-
-The union of the texts was no doubt accomplished by Madam Couperus, without
-the alteration of a sentence; but no such accomplished editing is possible
-to me; I am a victim to the disease of rewriting, and the inclusion of the
-hundred or more pages of new matter written for the American edition led me
-into a third revision of the story. But no more than in the second has the
-skeleton, or the attitude of the skeleton been altered in this third
-version, only flesh and muscle have been added, and, I think, a little
-life. _Vain Fortune_, even in its present form, is probably not my best
-book, but it certainly is far from being my worst. But my opinion regarding
-my own work is of no value; I do not write this Prefatory Note to express
-it, but to ask my critics and my readers to forget the original _Vain
-Fortune_, and to read this new book as if it were issued under another
-title.
-
-G.M.
-
-
-
-
-I
-
-
-The lamp had not been wiped, and the room smelt slightly of paraffin. The
-old window-curtains, whose harsh green age had not softened, were drawn.
-The mahogany sideboard, the threadbare carpet, the small horsehair sofa,
-the gilt mirror, standing on a white marble chimney-piece, said clearly,
-'Furnished apartments in a house built about a hundred years ago.' There
-were piles of newspapers, there were books on the mahogany sideboard and on
-the horsehair sofa, and on the table there were various manuscripts,--_The
-Gipsy_, Act I.; _The Gipsy_, Act III., Scenes iii. and iv.
-
-A sheet of foolscap paper, and upon it a long slender hand. The hand traced
-a few lines of fine, beautiful caligraphy, then it paused, correcting with
-extreme care what was already written, and in a hesitating, minute way,
-telling of a brain that delighted in the correction rather than in the
-creation of form.
-
-The shirt-cuff was frayed and dirty. The coat was thin and shiny. A
-half-length figure of a man drew out of the massed shadows between the
-window and sideboard. The red beard caught the light, and the wavy brown
-hair brightened. Then a look of weariness, of distress, passed over the
-face, and the man laid down the pen, and, taking some tobacco from a paper,
-rolled a cigarette. Rising, and leaning forward, he lighted it over the
-lamp. He was a man of about thirty-six feet, broad-shouldered, well-built,
-healthy, almost handsome.
-
-The time he spent in dreaming his play amounted to six times, if not ten
-times, as much as he devoted to trying to write it; and he now lit
-cigarette after cigarette, abandoning himself to every meditation,--the
-unpleasantness of life in lodgings, the charm of foreign travel, the beauty
-of the south, what he would do if his play succeeded. He plunged into
-calculation of the time it would take him to finish it if he were to sit at
-home all day, working from seven to ten hours every day. If he could but
-make up his mind concerning the beginning and the middle of the third act,
-and about the end, too,--the solution,--he felt sure that, with steady
-work, the play could be completed in a fortnight. In such reverie and such
-consideration he lay immersed, oblivious of the present moment, and did not
-stir from his chair until the postman shook the frail walls with a violent
-double knock. He hoped for a letter, for a newspaper--either would prove a
-welcome distraction. The servant's footsteps on the stairs told him the
-post had brought him something. His heart sank at the thought that it was
-probably only a bill, and he glanced at all the bills lying one above
-another on the table.
-
-It was not a bill, nor yet an advertisement, but a copy of a weekly review.
-He tore it open. An article about himself!
-
-After referring to the deplorable condition of the modern stage, the writer
-pointed out how dramatic writing has of late years come to be practised
-entirely by men who have failed in all other branches of literature. Then
-he drew attention to the fact that signs of weariness and dissatisfaction
-with the old stale stories, the familiar tricks in bringing about 'striking
-situations,' were noticeable, not only in the newspaper criticisms of new
-plays, but also among the better portion of the audience. He admitted,
-however, that hitherto the attempts made by younger writers in the
-direction of new subject-matter and new treatment had met with little
-success. But this, he held, was not a reason for discouragement. Did those
-who believed in the old formulas imagine that the new formula would be
-discovered straight away, without failures preliminary? Besides, these
-attempts were not utterly despicable; at least one play written on the new
-lines had met with some measure of success, and that play was Mr. Hubert
-Price's _Divorce_.
-
-'Yes, the fellow is right. The public is ready for a good play: it wasn't
-when _Divorce_ was given. I must finish _The Gipsy_. There are good things
-in it; that I know. But I wish I could get that third act right. The public
-will accept a masterpiece, but it will not accept an attempt to write a
-masterpiece. But this time there'll be no falling off in the last acts. The
-scene between the gipsy lover and the young lord will fetch 'em.' Taking up
-the review, Hubert glanced over the article a second time. 'How anxious the
-fellows are for me to achieve a success! How they believe in me! They
-desire it more than I do. They believe in me more than I do in myself. They
-want to applaud me. They are hungry for the masterpiece.'
-
-At that moment his eye was caught by some letters written on blue paper.
-His face resumed a wearied and hunted expression. 'There's no doubt about
-it, money I must get somehow. I am running it altogether too fine. There
-isn't twenty pounds between me and the deep sea.'
-
- * * * * *
-
-He was the son of the Rev. James Price, a Shropshire clergyman. The family
-was of Welsh extraction, but in Hubert none of the physical characteristics
-of the Celt appeared. He might have been selected as a typical Anglo-Saxon.
-The face was long and pale, and he wore a short reddish beard; the eyes
-were light blue, verging on grey, and they seemed to speak a quiet,
-steadfast soul. Hubert had always been his mother's favourite, and the
-scorn of his elder brothers, two rough boys, addicted in early youth to
-robbing orchards, and later on to gambling and drinking. The elder, after
-having broken his father's heart with debts and disgraceful living, had
-gone out to the Cape. News of his death came to the Rectory soon after; but
-James's death did not turn Henry from his evil courses, and one day his
-father and mother had to go to London on his account, and they brought him
-back a hopeless invalid. Hubert was twelve years of age when he followed
-his brother to the grave.
-
-It was at his brother's funeral that Hubert met for the first time his
-uncle, Mr. Burnett. Mr. Burnett had spent the greater part of his life in
-New Zealand, where he had made a large fortune by sheep-farming and
-investments in land. He had seemed to be greatly taken with his nephew, and
-for many years it was understood that he would leave him the greater part,
-if not the whole, of his fortune. But Mr. Burnett had come under the
-influence of some poor relations, some distant cousins, the Watsons, and
-had eventually decided to adopt their daughter Emily and leave her his
-fortune. He did not dare intimate his change of mind to his sister; but the
-news having reached Mrs. Price in various rumours, she wrote to her brother
-asking him to confirm or deny these rumours; and when he admitted their
-truth, Mrs. Price never spoke to him again. She was a determined woman, and
-the remembrance of the wrong done to her son never left her.
-
-While the other children had been a torment and disgrace, Hubert had been
-to his parents a consolation and a blessing. They had feared that he too
-might turn to betting and drink, but he had never shown sign of low tastes.
-He played no games, nor did he care for terriers or horses; but for books
-and drawing, and long country walks. Immediately on hearing of his
-disinheritance he had spoken at once of entering a profession; and for many
-months this was the subject of consideration in the Rectory. Hubert joined
-in these discussions willingly, but he could not bring himself to accept
-the army or the bar. It was indeed only necessary to look at him to see
-that neither soldier's tunic nor lawyer's wig was intended for him; and it
-was nearly as clear that those earnest eyes, so intelligent and yet so
-undetermined in their gaze, were not those of a doctor.
-
-But if his eyes failed to predict his future, his hands told the story of
-his life distinctly enough--those long, white, languid hands, what could
-they mean but art? And very soon Hubert began to draw, evincing some
-natural aptitude. Then an artist came into the neighbourhood, the two
-became friends, and went together on a long sketching tour. Life in the
-open air, the shade of the hedge, the glare of the highway, the meditation
-of the field, the languor of the river-side, the contemplation of wooded
-horizons, was what Hubert's pastoral nature was most fitted to enjoy; and,
-for the sake of the life it afforded him, he pursued the calling of a
-landscape painter long after he had begun to feel his desire turning in
-another direction. When the landscape on the canvas seemed hopelessly
-inadequate, he laid aside the brush for the pencil, and strove to interpret
-the summer fields in verse. From verse he drifted into the article and the
-short story, and from the story into the play. And it was in this last form
-that he felt himself strongest, and various were the dramas and comedies
-that he dreamed from year's end to year's end.
-
-While he was in the midst of his period of verse-writing his mother died,
-and in the following year, just as he was working at his stories, he
-received a telegram calling him to attend his father's death-bed. When the
-old man was laid in the shadow of the weather-beaten village church, Hubert
-gathered all his belongings and bade farewell for ever to the Shropshire
-rectory.
-
-In London Hubert made few friends. There were some two or three men with
-whom he was frequently seen--quiet folk like himself, whose enjoyment
-consisted in smoking a tranquil pipe in the evening, or going for long
-walks in the country. He was one of those men whose indefiniteness provokes
-curiosity, and his friends noticed and wondered why it was that he was so
-frequently the theme of their conversation. His simple, unaffected manners
-were full of suggestion, and in his writings there was always an
-indefinable rainbow-like promise of ultimate achievement. So, long before
-he had succeeded in writing a play, detached scenes and occasional verses
-led his friends into gradual belief that he was one from whom big things
-might be expected. And when the one-act play which they had all so heartily
-approved of was produced, and every newspaper praised it for its literary
-quality, the friends took pride in this public vindication of their
-opinion. After the production of his play people came to see the new
-author, and every Saturday evening some fifteen or twenty men used to
-assemble in Hubert's lodgings to drink whisky, smoke cigars, and talk
-drama. Encouraged by his success, Hubert wrote _Divorce_. He worked
-unceasingly upon it for more than a year, and when he had written the final
-scene, he was breaking into his last hundred pounds. The play was refused
-twice, and then accepted by a theatrical speculator, to whom it seemed to
-afford opportunity for the exhibition of the talents of a lady he was
-interested in.
-
-The success of the play was brief. But before it was withdrawn, Hubert had
-sold the American rights for a handsome sum, and within the next two years
-he had completed a second play, which he called _An Ebbing Tide_. Some of
-the critics argued that it contained scenes as fine as any in _Divorce_,
-but it was admitted on all sides that the interest withered in the later
-acts. But the failure of the play did not shake the established belief in
-Hubert's genius; it merely concentrated the admiration of those interested
-in the new art upon _Divorce_, the partial failure of which was now
-attributed to the acting. If it had only been played at the Haymarket or
-the Lyceum, it could not have failed.
-
-The next three years Hubert wasted in various aestheticisms. He explained
-the difference between the romantic and realistic methods in the reviews;
-he played with a poetic drama to be called _The King of the Beggars_, and
-it was not until the close of the third year that he settled down to
-definite work. Then all his energies were concentrated on a new play--_The
-Gipsy_. A young woman of Bohemian origin is suddenly taken with the
-nostalgia of the tent, and leaves her husband and her home to wander with
-those of her race. He had read portions of this play to his friends, who at
-last succeeded in driving Montague Ford, the popular actor-manager, to
-Hubert's door; and after hearing some few scenes he had offered a couple of
-hundred pounds in advance of fees for the completed manuscript. 'But when
-can I have the manuscript?' said Ford, as he was about to leave. 'As soon
-as I can finish it,' Hubert replied, looking at him wistfully out of pale
-blue-grey eyes. 'I could finish it in a month, if I could count on not
-being worried by duns or disturbed by friends during that time.'
-
-Ford looked at Hubert questioningly; then he said 'I have always noticed
-that when a fellow wants to finish a play, the only way to do it is to go
-away to the country and leave no address.'
-
-But the country was always so full of pleasure for him, that he doubted his
-power to remain indoors with the temptation of fields and rivers before his
-eyes, and he thought that to escape from dunning creditors it would be
-sufficient to change his address. So he left Norfolk Street for the more
-remote quarter of Fitzroy Street, where he took a couple of rooms on the
-second floor. One of his fellow-lodgers, he soon found, was Rose Massey, an
-actress engaged for the performance of small parts at the Queen's Theatre.
-The first time he spoke to her was on the doorstep. She had forgotten her
-latch-key, and he said, 'Will you allow me to let you in?' She stepped
-aside, but did not answer him. Hubert thought her rude, but her strange
-eyes and absent-minded manner had piqued his curiosity, and, having nothing
-to do that night, he went to the theatre to see her act. She was playing a
-very small part, and one that was evidently unsuited to her--a part that
-was in contradiction to her nature; but there was something behind the
-outer envelope which led him to believe she had real talent, and would make
-a name for herself when she was given a part that would allow her to reveal
-what was in her.
-
-In the meantime, Rose had been told that the gentleman she had snubbed in
-the passage was Mr. Hubert Price, the author of _Divorce_.
-
-'Oh, it was very silly of me,' she said to Annie. 'If I had only known!'
-
-'Lor', he don't mind; he'll be glad enough to speak to you when you meets
-him again.'
-
-And when they met again on the stairs, Rose nodded familiarly, and Hubert
-said--
-
-'I went to the Queen's the other night.'
-
-'Did you like the piece?'
-
-'I did not care about the piece; but when you get a wild, passionate part
-to play, you'll make a hit. The sentimental parts they give you don't suit
-you.'
-
-A sudden light came into the languid face. 'Yes, I shall do something if I
-can get a part like that.'
-
-Hubert told her that he was writing a play containing just such a part.
-
-Her eyes brightened again. 'Will you read me the play?' she said, fixing
-her dark, dreamy eyes on him.
-
-'I shall be very glad.... Do you think it won't bore you?' And his wistful
-grey eyes were full of interrogation.
-
-'No, I'm sure it won't.'
-
-And a few days after she sent Annie with a note, reminding him of his
-promise to read her what he had written. As she had only a bedroom, the
-reading had to take place in his sitting-room. He read her the first and
-second acts. She was all enthusiasm, and begged hard to be allowed to study
-the part--just to see what she could do with it--just to let him see that
-he was not mistaken in her. Her interest in his work captivated him, and he
-couldn't refuse to lend her the manuscript.
-
-
-
-
-II
-
-
-Rose often came to see Hubert in his rooms. Her manner was disappointing,
-and he thought he must be mistaken in his first judgment of her talents.
-But one afternoon she gave him a recitation of the sleep-walking scene in
-_Macbeth_. It was strange to see this little dark-complexioned, dark-eyed
-girl, the merest handful of flesh and bone, divest herself at will of her
-personality, and assume the tragic horror of Lady Macbeth, or the
-passionate rapture of Juliet detaining her husband-lover on the balcony of
-her chamber. Hubert watched in wonderment this girl, so weak and languid in
-her own nature, awaking only to life when she assumed the personality of
-another. There she lay, her wispy form stretched in his arm-chair, her
-great dark eyes fixed, her mind at rest, sunk in some inscrutable dream.
-Her thin hand lay on the arm of the chair: when she woke from her day-dream
-she burst into irresponsible laughter, or questioned him with petulant
-curiosity. He looked again: her dark curling hair hung on her swarthy neck,
-and she was somewhat untidily dressed in blue linen.
-
-'Were you ever in love?' she said suddenly. 'I don't suppose you could be;
-you are too occupied with your play. I don't know, though; you might be in
-love, but I don't think that many women would be in love with you.... You
-are too good a man, and women don't like good men.'
-
-Hubert laughed, and without a trace of offended vanity in his voice he
-said, 'I don't profess to be much of a lady-killer.'
-
-'You don't know what I mean,' she said, looking at him fixedly, a maze of
-half-childish, half-artistic curiosity in her handsome eyes.
-
-Perplexed in his shy, straightford nature, Hubert inquired if she took
-sugar in her tea. She said she did; stretched her feet to the fire, and
-lapsed into dream. She was one of the enigmas of Stageland. She supported
-herself, and went about by herself, looking a poor, lost little thing. She
-spoke with considerable freedom of language on all subjects, but no one had
-been able to fix a lover upon her.
-
-'What a part Lady Hayward is! But tell me,--I don't quite catch your
-meaning in the second act. Is this it?' and starting to her feet, she
-became in a moment another being. With a gesture, a look, an intonation,
-she was the woman of the play,--a woman taken by an instinct, long
-submerged, but which has floated to the surface, and is beginning to
-command her actions. In another moment she had slipped back into her weary
-lymphatic nature, at once prematurely old and extravagantly childish. She
-could not talk of indifferent things; and having asked some strange
-questions, and laughed loudly, she wished Hubert 'Good-afternoon' in her
-curious, irresponsible fashion, taking her leave abruptly.
-
-The next two days Hubert devoted entirely to his play. There were things in
-it which he knew were good, but it was incomplete. Montague Ford would not
-produce it in its present form. He must put his shoulder to the wheel and
-get it right; one more push, that was all that was wanted. And he could be
-heard walking to and fro, up and down, along and across his tiny
-sitting-room, stopping suddenly to take a note of an idea that had occurred
-to him.
-
-One day he went to Hampstead Heath. A long walk, he thought, would clear
-his mind, and he returned home thinking of his play. The sunset still
-glittering in the skies; the bare trees were beautifully distinct on the
-blue background of the suburban street, and at the end of the long
-perspective, a 'bus and a hansom could be seen coming towards him. As they
-grew larger, his thoughts defined themselves, and the distressing problem
-of his fourth act seemed to solve itself. That very evening he would sketch
-out a new dramatic movement around which all the other movements of the act
-would cluster. But at the corner of Fitzroy Square, within a few yards of
-No. 17, he was accosted by a shabbily-dressed man, who inquired if he were
-Mr. Price. On being answered in the affirmative, the shabbily-dressed man
-said, 'Then I have something for ye; I have been a-watching for ye for the
-last three days, but ye didn't come out; missed yer this morning: 'ere it
-is;' and he thrust a folded paper into Hubert's hand.
-
-'What is this?'
-
-'Don't yer know?' he said with a grin; 'Messrs. Tomkins & Co., Tailors,
-writ--twenty-two pound odd.'
-
-Hubert made no answer; he put the paper in his pocket, opened the door
-quietly, stole up to his room, and sat down to think. The first thing to do
-was to examine into his finances. It was alarming to find that he was
-breaking into his last five-pound note. True that he was close on the end
-of his play, and when it was finished he would be able to draw on Ford. But
-a summons to appear in the county court could not fail to do him immense
-injury. He had heard of avoiding service, but he knew little of the law,
-and wondered what power the service of the writ gave his creditor over him.
-His instinct was to escape--hide himself where they would not be able to
-find him, and so obtain time to finish his play. But he owed his landlady
-money, and his departure would have to be clandestine. As he reflected on
-how many necessaries he might carry away in a newspaper, he began to feel
-strangely like a criminal, and while rolling up a couple of shirts, a few
-pairs of socks, and some collars, he paused, his hands resting on the
-parcel. He did not seem to know himself, and it was difficult to believe
-that he really intended to leave the house in this disreputable fashion.
-Mechanically he continued to add to his parcel, thinking all the while that
-he must go, otherwise his play would never be written.
-
-He had been working very well for the last few days, and now he saw his way
-quite clearly; the inspiration he had been so long waiting for had come at
-last, and he felt sure of his fourth act. At the same time he wished to
-conduct himself honestly, even in this distressing situation. Should he
-tell his landlady the truth? But the desire to realise his idea was
-intolerable, and, yielding as if before an irresistible force, he tied the
-parcel and prepared to go. At that moment he remembered that he must leave
-a note for his landlady, and he was more than ever surprised at the
-naturalness with which lying phrases came into his head. But when it came
-to committing them to paper, he found he could not tell an absolute lie,
-and he wrote a simple little note to the effect that he had been called
-away on urgent business, and hoped to return in about a week.
-
-He descended the stairs softly. Mrs. Wilson's sitting-room opened on to the
-passage; she might step out at any moment, and intercept his exit. He had
-nearly reached the last flight when he remembered that he had forgotten his
-manuscripts. His flesh turned cold, his heart stood still. There was
-nothing for it but to ascend those creaking stairs again. His already
-heavily encumbered pockets could not be persuaded to receive more than a
-small portion of the manuscripts. He gathered them in his hand, and
-prepared to redescend the perilous stairs. He walked as lightly as
-possible, dreading that every creak would bring Mrs. Wilson from her
-parlour. A few more steps, and he would be in the passage. A smell of dust,
-sounds of children crying, children talking in the kitchen! A few more
-steps, and, with his eyes on the parlour door, Hubert had reached the rug
-at the foot of the stairs. He hastened along, the passage. Mrs. Wilson was
-a moment too late. His hand was on the street-door when she appeared at the
-door of her parlour.
-
-'Mr. Price, I want to speak to you before you go out. There has----'
-
-'I can't wait--running to catch a train. You'll find a letter on my table.
-It will explain.'
-
-Hubert slipped out, closed the door, and ran down the street, and it was
-not until he had put two or three streets between him and Fitzroy Street
-that he relaxed his pace, and could look behind him without dreading to
-feel the hand of the 'writter' upon his shoulder.
-
-
-
-
-III
-
-
-Then he wandered, not knowing where he was going, still in the sensation of
-his escape, a little amused, and yet with a shadow of fear upon his soul,
-for he grew more and more conscious of the fact that he was homeless, if
-not quite penniless. Suddenly he stopped walking. Night was thickening in
-the street, and he had to decide where he would sleep. He could not afford
-to pay more than five or six shillings a week for a room, and he thought of
-Holloway, as being a neighbourhood where creditors would not be able to
-find him. So he retraced his steps, and, tired and footsore, entered the
-Tottenham Court Road by the Oxford Street end.
-
-There the omnibuses stopped. A conductor shouted for fares, with the light
-of the public-house lamps on his open mouth. There was smell of mud, of
-damp clothes, of bad tobacco, and where the lights of the costermongers'
-barrows broke across the footway the picture was of a group of three
-coarse, loud-voiced girls, followed by boys. There were fish shops, cheap
-Italian restaurants, and the long lines of low houses vanished in crapulent
-night. The characteristics of the Tottenham Court Road impressed themselves
-on Hubert's mind, and he thought how he would have to bear for at least
-three weeks with all the grime of its poverty. It would take about that
-time to finish his play, and the neighbourhood would suit his purpose
-excellently well. So long as he did not pass beyond it he ran little risk
-of discovery, and to secure himself against friends and foes he penetrated
-farther northward, not stopping till he reached the confines of Holloway.
-
-Then a little dim street caught his eye, and he knocked at the door of the
-first house exhibiting a card in the parlour window. But they did not let
-their bedroom under seven shillings, and this seemed to Hubert to be an
-extravagant price. He tried farther on, and at last found a clean room for
-six shillings. Having no luggage, he paid a week's rent in advance, and the
-landlady promised to get him a small table, on which he could write, a
-small table that would fit in somewhere near the window. She asked him when
-he would like to be called, and put the candlestick on the chair. Hubert
-looked round the room, and a moment sufficed to complete the survey. It was
-about seven feet long. The lower half of the window was curtained by a
-piece of muslin hardly bigger than a good-sized pocket-handkerchief; to do
-anything in this room except to lie in bed seemed difficult, and Hubert sat
-down on the bed and emptied out his pockets. He had just four pounds, and
-the calculation how long he could live on such a sum took him some time.
-His breakfast, whether he had it at home or in the coffee-house, would cost
-him at least fourpence. He thought he would be able to obtain a fairly good
-dinner in one of the little Italian restaurants for ninepence. His tea
-would cost the same as his breakfast. To these sums he must add twopence
-for tobacco and a penny for an evening paper--impossible to do without
-tobacco, and he must know what was going on in the world. He could
-therefore live for one shilling and eightpence a day--eleven shillings a
-week--to which he would have to add six shillings a week for rent,
-altogether seventeen shillings a week. He really did not see how he could
-do it cheaper. Four times seventeen are sixty-eight; sixty-eight shillings
-for a month of life, and he had eighty shillings--twelve shillings for
-incidental expenses; and out of that twelve shillings he must buy a shirt,
-a sponge, and a tooth brush, and when they were bought there would be very
-little left. He must finish his play under the month. Nothing could be
-clearer than that.
-
-Next morning he asked the landlady to let him have a cup of tea and some
-bread and butter, and he ate as much bread as he could, to save himself
-from being hungry in the middle of the day. He began work immediately, and
-continued until seven, and feeling then somewhat light-headed, but
-satisfied with himself, went to the nearest Italian restaurant. The food
-was better than he expected; but he spent twopence more than he had
-intended, so, to accustom himself to a life of strict measure and
-discipline, he determined to forego his tea that evening. And so he lived
-and worked until the end of the week.
-
-But the situation he had counted on to complete his fourth act had proved
-almost impracticable in the working out; he laboured on, however, and at
-the end of the tenth day at least one scene satisfied him. He read it over
-slowly, carefully, thought about it, decided that it was excellent, and lay
-down on his bed to consider it. At that moment it struck him that he had
-better calculate how much he had spent in the last ten days. He gathered
-himself into a sitting posture and counted his money; he had spent thirty
-shillings, and at that rate his money would not hold out till the end of
-the month. He must reduce his expenditure; but how? Impossible to find a
-room where he could live more cheaply than in the one he had got, and it is
-not easy to dine in London on less than ninepence. Only the poor can live
-cheaply. He pressed his hands to his face. His head seemed like splitting,
-and his monetary difficulty, united with his literary difficulties,
-produced a momentary insanity. Work that morning was impossible, so he went
-out to study the eating-houses of the neighbourhood. He must find one where
-he could dine for sixpence. Or he might buy a pound of cooked beef and take
-it home with him in a paper bag; but that would seem an almost intolerable
-imprisonment in his little room. He could go to a public-house and dine off
-a sausage and potato. But at that moment his attention was caught by black
-letters on a dun, yellowish ground: 'Lockhart's Cocoa Rooms.' Not having
-breakfasted, he decided to have a cup of cocoa and a roll.
-
-It was a large, barn-like place, the walls covered with a coat of grey-blue
-paint. Under the window there was a zinc counter, with zinc urns always
-steaming, emiting odours of tea, coffee, and cocoa. The seats were like
-those which give a garden-like appearance to the tops of some omnibuses.
-Each was made to hold two persons, and the table between them was large
-enough for four plates and four pairs of hands. A few hollow-chested men,
-the pale vagrants of civilisation, drowsed in the corners. They had been
-hunted through the night by the policeman, and had come in for something
-hot. Hubert noted the worn frock-coats, and the miserable arms coming out
-of shirtless sleeves. One looked up inquiringly, and Hubert thought how
-slight had become the line that divided him from the outcast. A
-serving-maid collected the plates, knives and forks, when the customers
-left, and carried them back to the great zinc counter.
-
-Impressed by his appearance, she brought him what he had ordered and took
-the money for it, although the custom of the place was for the customer to
-pay for food at the counter and carry it himself to the table at which he
-chose to eat. Hubert learnt that there was no set dinner, but there was a
-beef-steak pudding at one, price fourpence, a penny potatoes, a penny
-bread. So by dining at Lockhart's he would be able to cut down his daily
-expense by at least twopence; that would extend the time to finish his play
-by nearly a week. And if his appetite were not keen, he could assuage it
-with a penny plum pudding; or he could take a middle course, making his
-dinner off a sausage and mashed potatoes. The room was clean, well lighted,
-and airy; he could read his paper there, and forget his troubles in the
-observation of character. He even made friends. An old wizen creature, who
-had been a prize-fighter, told him of his triumphs. If he hadn't broke his
-hand on somebody's nose he'd have been champion light-weight of England.
-'And to think that I have come to this,' he added emphatically. 'Even them
-boys knock me about now, and 'alf a century ago I could 'ave cleared the
-bloomin' place.' There was a merry little waif from the circus who loved to
-come and sit with Hubert. She had been a rider, she said, but had broken
-her leg on one occasion, and cut her head all open on another, and had
-ended by running away with some one who had deserted her. 'So here I am,'
-she remarked, with a burst of laughter, 'talking to you. Did you never hear
-of Dolly Dayrell?' Hubert confessed that he had not. 'Why,' she said, 'I
-thought every one had.'
-
-About eight o'clock in the evening, the table near the stairs was generally
-occupied by flower-girls, dressed in dingy clothes, and brightly feathered
-hats. They placed their empty baskets on the floor, and shouted at their
-companions--men who sold newspapers, boot-laces, and cheap toys. About nine
-the boys came in, the boys who used to push the old prize-fighter about,
-and Hubert soon began to perceive how representative they were of all
-vices--gambling, theft, idleness, and cruelty were visible in their faces.
-They were led by a Jew boy who sold penny jewellery at the corner of Oxford
-Street, and they generally made for the tables at the end of the room, for
-there, unless custom was slack indeed, they could defeat the vigilance of
-the serving-maid and play at nap at their ease. The tray of penny jewellery
-was placed at the corner of a table, and a small boy set to watch over it.
-His duty was also to shuffle his feet when the servant-maid approached, and
-a precious drubbing he got if he failed to shuffle them loud enough. The
-''ot un,' as he was nicknamed, always had a pack of cards in his pocket,
-and to annex everything left on the tables he considered to be his
-privilege. One day, when he was asked how he came by the fine carnation in
-his buttonhole, he said it was a present from Sally, neglecting to add that
-he had told the child to steal it from a basket which a flower-girl had
-just put down.
-
-[Illustration: "'A dirty, hignominious lot, them boys is.'"]
-
-Hubert hated this boy, and once could not resist boxing his ears. The ''ot
-un' writhed easily out of his reach, and then assailed him with foul
-language, and so loud were his words that they awoke the innocent cause of
-the quarrel, a weak, sickly-looking man, with pale blue eyes and a blonde
-beard. Hubert had protected him before now against the brutality of the
-boys, who, when they were not playing nap, divided their pleasantries
-between him and the decrepit prize-fighter. He came in about nine, took a
-cup of coffee from the counter, and settled himself for a snooze. The boys
-knew this, and it was their amusement to keep him awake by pelting him with
-egg-shells and other missiles. Hubert noticed that he had always with him a
-red handkerchief full of some sort of loose rubbish, which the boys
-gathered when it fell about the floor, or purloined from the handkerchief
-when they judged that the owner was sufficiently fast asleep. Hubert now
-saw that the handkerchief was filled with bits of coloured chalk, and
-guessed that the man must be a pavement artist.
-
-'A dirty, hignominious lot, them boys is,' said the artist, fixing his
-pale, melancholy eyes on Hubert; 'bad manners, no eddication, and, above
-all, no respect.'
-
-'They are an unmannerly lot--that Jew boy especially. I don't think there's
-a vice he hasn't got.'
-
-The artist stared at Hubert a long time in silence. A thought seemed to be
-stirring in his mind.
-
-'I'm speaking, I can see, to a man of eddication. I'm a fust-rate judge of
-character, though I be but a pavement artist; but a picture's none the less
-a picture, no matter where it is drawn. That's true, ain't it?'
-
-'Quite true. A horse is a horse, and an ass is an ass, no matter what
-stable you put them into.'
-
-The artist laughed a guttural laugh, and, fixing his pale blue porcelain
-eyes on Hubert, he said--
-
-'Yes; see I made no bloomin' error when I said you was a man of eddication.
-A literary gent, I should think. In the reporting line, most like. Down in
-the luck like myself. What was it--drink? Got the chuck?'
-
-'No,' said Hubert, 'never touch it. Out of work.'
-
-'No offence, master, we're all mortal, we is all weak, and in misfortune we
-goes to it. It was them boys that drove me to it.'
-
-'How was that?'
-
-'They was always round my show; no getting rid of them, and their remarks
-created a disturbance; the perlice said he wouldn't 'ave it, and when the
-perlice won't 'ave it, what's a poor man to do? They are that hignorant.
-But what's the use of talking of it, it only riles me.' The blue-eyed man
-lay back in his seat, and his head sank on his chest. He looked as if he
-were going to sleep again, but on Hubert's asking him to explain his
-troubles, he leaned across the table.
-
-'Well, I'll tell yer. Yer be an eddicated man, and I likes to talk to them
-that 'as 'ad an eddication. Yer says, and werry truly, just now, that
-changing the stable don't change an 'orse into a hass, or a hass into an
-'orse. That is werry true, most true, none but a eddicated man could 'ave
-made that 'ere hobservation. I likes yer for it. Give us yer 'and. The
-public just thinks too much of the stable, and not enough of what's inside.
-Leastways that's my experience of the public, and I 'ave been a-catering
-for the public ever since I was a growing lad--sides of bacon, ships on
-fire, good old ship on fire.... I knows the public. Yer don't follow me?'
-
-'Not quite.'
-
-'A moment, and I'll explain. You'll admit there's no blooming reason except
-the public's blooming hignorance why a man shouldn't do as good a picture
-on the pavement as on a piece of canvas, provided he 'ave the blooming
-genius. There is no doubt that with them 'ere chalks and a nice smooth
-stone that Raphael--I 'ave been to the National Gallery and 'ave studied
-'is work, and werry fine some of it is, although I don't altogether
-hold--but that's another matter. What was I a-saying of? I remember,--that
-with them 'ere chalks, and a nice smooth stone, there's no reason why a
-masterpiece shouldn't be done. That's right, ain't it? I ask you, as a man
-of eddication, to say if that ain't right; as a representative of the
-Press, I asks you to say.' Hubert nodded, and the pale-eyed man continued.
-'Well, that's what the public won't see, can't see. Raphael, says I, could
-'ave done a masterpiece with them 'ere chalks and a nice smooth stone. But
-do yer think 'e 'd 'ave been allowed? Do yer think the perlice would 'ave
-stood it? Do yer think the public would 'ave stood him doing masterpieces
-on the pavement? I'd give 'im just one afternoon. Them boys would 'ave got
-'im into trouble, just as they did me. Raphael would 'ave been told to wipe
-them out just as I was.'
-
-The conversation paused; and, half amused, half frightened, Hubert
-considered the pale vague face, and he was struck by the scattered look of
-aspiration that wandered in the pale blue eyes.
-
-'I'll tell you,' said the man, growing more excited, and leaning further
-across the table; 'I'll tell you, because I knows you for an eddicated man,
-and won't blab. S'pose yer thinks, like the rest of the world, that the
-chaps wot smears, for it ain't drawing, the pavement with bits of bacon, a
-ship on fire, and the regulation oysters, does them out of their own
-'eads?' Hubert nodded. 'I'm not surprised that you do, all the world do,
-and the public chucks down its coppers to the poor hartist; but 'e aint no
-hartist, no more than is them 'ere boys that did for my show.' Leaning
-still further forward, he lowered his voice to a whisper. 'They learns it
-all by 'art; there is schools for the teaching of it down in Whitechapel.
-They can just do what they learns by 'art, not one of them could draw that
-'ere chair or table from natur'; but I could. I 'ave an original talent. It
-was a long time afore I found out it was there,' he said, tapping his
-forehead; 'but it is there,' he said, fixing his eyes on Hubert, 'and when
-it is there they can't take it away--I mean my mates--though they do laugh
-at my ideas. They call me "the genius," for they don't believe in me, but I
-believe in myself, and they laughs best that laughs last.... I don't know,'
-he said, looking round him, his eyes full of reverie, 'that the public
-liked my fancy landscapes better than the ship on fire, but I said the
-public will come to them in time, and I continued my fancy landscapes. But
-one day in Trafalgar Square it came on to rain very 'eavy, and I went for
-shelter into the National Gallery. It was my fust visit, and I was struck
-all of a 'eap, and ever since I can 'ardly bring myself to go on with the
-drudgery of the piece of bacon, and the piece of cheese, with the mouse
-nibbling at it. And ever since my 'ead 'as been filled with other things,
-though for a long time I could not make exactly out what. I 'ave 'eard that
-that is always the case with men that 'as an idea--daresay you 'ave found
-it so yourself. So in my spare time I goes to the National to think it out,
-and in studying the pictures there I got wery interested in a chap called
-Hetty, and 'e do paint the female form divine. I says to myself, Why not go
-in for lovely woman? the public may not care for fancy landscapes, but the
-public allus likes a lovely woman, and, as well as being popular, lovely
-woman is 'igh 'art. So, after dinner hour, I sets to work, and sketches in
-a blue sea with three bathers, and two boxes, with the 'orse's head looking
-out from behind one of the boxes. For a fust attempt at the nude, I assure
-you--it ain't my way to blow my own trumpet, but I can say that the crowd
-that 'ere picture did draw was bigger than any that 'ad assembled about the
-bits o' bacon and ship-a-fire of all the other coves. 'Ad I been let alone,
-I should 'ave made my fortune, but the crowd was so big and the curiosity
-so great that it took the perlice all their time to keep the pavement from
-being blocked. It wasn't that the public didn't like it enough, it was that
-the public liked it too much, that was the reason of my misfortune.'
-
-'What do you mean?' said Hubert.
-
-'Well, yer see them boys was a-hawking their cheap toys in the
-neighbourhood, and when they got wind of my success they comes round to
-see, and they remains on account of the crowd. Pockets was picked, I don't
-say they wasn't, and the perlice turned rusty, and then a pious old gent
-comes along, and 'earing the remarks of them boys, which I admit wasn't
-nice, complains to the hauthorities, and I was put down! Now, what I wants
-to know is why my art should be made to suffer for the beastly-mindedness
-of them 'ere boys.'
-
-Hubert admitted that there seemed to be an injustice somewhere, and asked
-the artist if he had never tried again.
-
-'Try again? Should think I did. When once a man 'as tasted of 'igh art, he
-can't keep his blooming fingers out of it. It was impossible after the
-success of my bathers to go back to the bacon, so I thought I would
-circumvent the hauthorities. I goes to the National Gallery, makes a
-sketch, 'ere it is,' and after some fumbling in his breast pocket, he
-produced a greasy piece of paper, which he handed to Hubert. 'S'pose yer
-know the picture?' Hubert admitted that he did not. 'Well, that is a
-drawing from Gainsborough's celebrated picture of Medora a-washing of her
-feet.... But the perlice wouldn't 'ave it any more than my original, 'e
-said it was worse than the bathers at Margaret, and when I told the
-hignorant brute wot it was, 'e said he wanted no hargument, that 'e
-wouldn't 'ave it.'
-
-Hubert had noticed, during the latter part of the narrative, a look of
-dubious cunning twinkling in the pale eyes; but now this look died away,
-and the eyes resumed their habitual look of vague reverie.
-
-'I've been 'ad up before the Beak: from him I expected more enlightenment,
-but he, too, said 'e wouldn't 'ave it, and I got a month. But I'll beat
-them yet, the public is on my side, and if it worn't for them 'ere boys,
-I'd say that the public could be helevated. They calls me "the genius," and
-they is right.' Then something seemed to go out like a flame, the face grew
-dim, and changed expression. 'It is 'ere all right,' he said, no longer
-addressing Hubert, but speaking to himself, 'and since it is there, it must
-come out.'
-
-
-
-
-IV
-
-
-Hubert at last found himself obliged to write to Ford for an advance of
-money. But Ford replied that he would advance money only on the delivery of
-the completed manuscript. And the whole of one night, in a room hardly
-eight feet long, sitting on his bed, he strove to complete the fourth and
-fifth acts. But under the pressure of such necessity ideas died within him.
-And all through the night, and even when the little window, curtained with
-a bit of muslin hardly bigger than a pocket-handkerchief, had grown white
-with dawn, he sat gazing at the sheet of paper, his brain on fire, unable
-to think. Laying his pen down in despair, he thought of the thousands who
-would come to his aid if they only knew--if they only knew! And soon after
-he heard life beginning again in the little brick street. He felt that his
-brain was giving way, that if he did not find change, whatever it was, he
-must surely run raving mad. He had had enough of England, and would leave
-it for America, Australia--anywhere. He wanted change. The present was
-unendurable. How would he get to America? Perhaps a clerkship on board one
-of the great steamships might be obtained.
-
-The human animal in extreme misery becomes self-reliant, and Hubert hardly
-thought of making application to his uncle. The last time he had applied
-for help his letter had remained unanswered, and he now felt that he must
-make his own living or die. And, quite indifferent as to what might befall
-him, he walked next day to the Victoria Docks. He did not know where or how
-to apply for work, and he tired himself in fruitless endeavour. At last he
-felt he could strive with fate no longer, and wandered mile after mile,
-amused and forgetful of his own misery in the spectacle of the river--the
-rose sky, the long perspectives, the houses and warehouses showing in fine
-outline, and then the wonderful blue night gathering in the forest of masts
-and rigging. He was admirably patient. There was no fretfulness in his
-soul, nor did he rail against the world's injustice, but took his
-misfortunes with sweet gentleness.
-
-He slept in a public-house, and next day resumed his idle search for
-employment. The weather was mild and beautiful, his wants were simple, a
-cup of coffee and a roll, a couple of sausages, and the day passed in a
-sort of morose and passionless contemplation. He thought of everything and
-nothing, least of all of how he should find money for the morrow. When the
-day came, and the penny to buy a cup of coffee was wanting, he quite
-naturally, without giving it a second thought, engaged himself as a
-labourer, and worked all day carrying sacks of grain out of a vessel's
-hold. For a large part of his nature was patient and simple, docile as an
-animal's. There was in him so much that was rudimentary, that in accepting
-this burden of physical toil he was acting not in contradiction to, but in
-full and perfect harmony with, his true nature.
-
-But at the end of a week his health began to give way, and, like a man
-after a violent debauch, he thought of returning to a more normal
-existence. He had left the manuscript of his unfortunate play in the North.
-Had they destroyed it? The involuntary fear of the writer for his child
-made him smile. What did it matter? Clearly the first thing to do would be
-to write to the editor of _The Cosmopolitan_, and ask if he could find him
-some employment, something certain; writing occasional articles for
-newspapers, that he couldn't do.
-
-Hubert had saved twelve shillings. He would therefore be able to pay his
-landlady: he smiled--one of his landladies! The earlier debt was now
-hopelessly out of his reach, and seemed to represent a social plane from
-which he had for ever fallen. If he had succeeded in getting that play
-right, what a difference it would have made! He would have been able to do
-a number of things he had never done, things which he had always desired to
-do. He had desired above all to travel--to see France and Italy; to linger,
-to muse in the shadows of the world's past; and after this he had desired
-marriage, an English wife, an English home, beautiful children, leisure,
-the society of friends. A successful play would have given him all these
-things, and now his dream must remain for ever unrealised by him. He had
-sunk out of sight and hearing of such life.
-
-Rose was another; she might sink as he had sunk; she might never find the
-opportunity of realising her desire. How well she would have played that
-part! He knew what was in her. And now! What did his failure to write that
-play condemn him to? Heaven only knows, he did not wish to think. Strange,
-was it not strange?... A man of genius--many believed him a genius--and yet
-he was incapable of earning his daily bread otherwise than by doing the
-work of a navvy. Even that he could not do well, society had softened his
-muscles and effeminised his constitution. Indeed, he did not know what life
-fate had willed him for. He seemed to be out of place everywhere. His best
-chance was to try to obtain a clerkship. The editor of _The Cosmopolitan_
-might be able to do that for him; if he could not, far better it would be
-to leave a world in which he was _out of place_, and through no fault of
-his own--that was the hard part of it. Hard part! Nonsense! What does Fate
-know of our little rights and wrongs--or care? Her intentions are
-inscrutable; she watches us come and go, and gives no sign. Prayers are
-vain. The good man is punished, and the wicked is sent on his way
-rejoicing.
-
-In such mournful thought, his clothes stained and torn, with all the traces
-of a week's toil in the docks upon them, Hubert made his way round St.
-Paul's and across Holborn. As he was about to cross into Oxford Street, he
-heard some one accost him,--
-
-'Oh, Mr. Price, is that you?' It was Rose. 'Where have you been all this
-time?'
-
-She seemed so strange, so small, and so much alone in the great
-thoroughfare, that Hubert forgot all his own troubles in a sudden interest
-in this little mite. 'Where have you been hiding yourself?... It is lucky I
-met you. Don't you know that Ford has decided to revive _Divorce_?'
-
-'You don't mean it!'
-
-'Yes; Ford said that the last acts of _The Gipsy_ were not satisfactorily
-worked out, and as there was something wrong with that Hamilton Brown's
-piece, he has decided to revive _Divorce_. He says it never was properly
-played ... he thinks he'll make a hit in the husband's part, and I daresay
-he will. But I have been unfortunate again; I wanted the part of the
-adventuress. I really could play it. I don't look it, I know ... I have no
-weight, but I could play it for all that. The public mightn't see me in it
-at first, but in five minutes they would.'
-
-'And what part has he cast you for--the young girl?'
-
-'Of course; there's no other part. He says I look it; but what's the good
-of looking it when you don't feel it? If he had cast me for Mrs.
-Barrington, I should have had just the five minutes in the second act that
-I have been waiting for so long, and I should have just wiped Miss Osborne
-out, acted her off the stage.... I know I should; you needn't believe it if
-don't like, but I know I should.'
-
-Hubert wondered how any one could feel so sure of herself, and then he
-said, 'Yes, I think you could do just what you say.... How do you think
-Miss Osborne will play the part?'
-
-'She'll be correct enough; she'll miss nothing, and yet somehow she'll miss
-the whole thing. But you must go at once to Ford. He was saying only this
-morning that if you didn't turn up soon, he'd have to give up the idea.'
-
-'I can't go and see him to-night. You see what a state I'm in.'
-
-'You're rather dusty; where have you been? what have you been doing?'
-
-'I've been down at the dock.... I thought of going to America.'
-
-'Well, we'll talk about that another time. It doesn't matter if you are a
-bit dusty and worn-out-looking. Now that he's going to revive your play,
-he'll let you have some money. You might get a new hat, though. I don't
-know how much they cost, but I've five shillings; can you get one for
-that?'
-
-Hubert thanked her.
-
-'But you are not offended?'
-
-'Offended, my dear Rose! I shall be able to manage. I'll get a brush up
-somewhere.'
-
-'That's all right. Now I'm going to jump into that 'bus,' and she signed
-with her parasol to the conductor. 'Mind you see Ford to-night,' she cried;
-and a moment after he saw a small space of blue back seated against one of
-the windows.
-
-
-
-
-V
-
-
-There was much prophecy abroad. Stiggins' words, 'The piece never did, and
-never will draw money,' were evidently present in everybody's mind. They
-were visible in Ford's face, and more than once Hubert expected to hear
-that--on account of severe indisposition--Mr. Montague Ford has been
-obliged to indefinitely postpone his contemplated revival of Mr. Hubert
-Price's play _Divorce_. But, besides the apprehension that Stiggins'
-unfavourable opinion of his enterprise had engendered in him, Ford was
-obviously provoked by Hubert's reluctance to execute the alterations he had
-suggested. Night after night, sometimes until six in the morning, Hubert
-sat up considering them. Thanks to Ford's timely advance he was back in his
-old rooms in Fitzroy Street. All was as it had been. He was working at his
-play every evening, waiting for Rose's footsteps on the stairs. And yet a
-change had come into his life! He believed now that his feet were set on
-the way to fortune--that he would soon be happy.
-
-He stared at the bright flame of the lamp, he listened to the silence. The
-clock chimed sharply, and the windows were growing grey. Hubert had begun
-to drowse in his chair; but he had promised to rewrite the young girl's
-part, Ford having definitely refused to intrust Rose with the part of the
-adventuress. He was sorry for this. He believed that Rose had not only
-talent, but genius. Besides, they were friends, neighbours; he would like
-to give her a chance of distinguishing herself--the chance which she was
-seeking. All the time he could not but realise that, however he might
-accentuate and characterise the part of the sentimental girl, Rose would
-not be able to do much with it. To bring out her special powers something
-strange, wild, or tragic was required. But of what use thinking of what was
-not to be? Having made some alterations and additions he folded his papers
-up, and addressed them to Miss Massey. He wrote on a piece of paper that
-they were to be given to her at once, and that he was to be called at ten.
-There was a rehearsal at twelve.
-
-On the night of the first performance, Hubert asked Rose to dine in his
-rooms. Mr. Wilson proposed that they should have a roast chicken, and Annie
-was sent to fetch a bottle of champagne from the grocer's. Annie had been
-given a ticket for the pit. Mrs. Wilson was going to the upper boxes. Annie
-said,--
-
-'Why, you look as if you was going to a funeral, and not to a play. Why
-don't ye laugh?'
-
-In truth, Hubert and Rose were a little silent. Rose was thinking how she
-could say certain lines. She had said them right once at rehearsal, but had
-not since been able to reproduce to her satisfaction a certain effect of
-voice. Hubert was too nervous to talk. There was nothing in his mind but
-'Will the piece succeed? What shall I do if it fails?' He could give heed
-to nothing but himself, all the world seemed blotted out, and he suffered
-the pain of excessive self-concentration. Rose, on the other hand, had lost
-sight of herself, and existed almost unconsciously in the soul of another
-being. She was sometimes like a hypnotised spectator watching with foolish,
-involuntary curiosity the actions of one whom she had been bidden to watch.
-Then a little cloud would gather over her eyes, and then this other being
-would rise as if out of her very entrails and recreate her, fashioning her
-to its own image and likeness.
-
-She did not answer when she was spoken to, and when the question was
-repeated, she awoke with a little start. Dinner was eaten in morbid
-silence, with painful and fitful efforts to appear interested in each
-other. Walking to the theatre, they once took the wrong turning and had to
-ask the way. At the stage door they smiled painfully, nodded, glad to part.
-Hubert went up to Montague Ford's room. He found the comedian on a low
-stool, seated before a low table covered with brushes and cosmetics, in
-front of a triple glass.
-
-'My dear friend, do not trouble me now. I am thinking of my part.'
-
-Hubert turned to go.
-
-'Stay a moment,' cried the actor. 'You know when the husband meets the wife
-he has divorced?'
-
-Hubert remembered the moment referred to, and, with anxious, doubting eyes,
-the comedian sought from the author justification for some intonations and
-gestures which seemed to him to form part and parcel of the nature of the
-man whose drunkenness he had so admirably depicted on his face.
-
-'"_This is most unfortunate, very unlucky--very, my dear Louisa; but----_"
-
-'"_I am no longer obliged to bear with your insults; I can now defend
-myself against you._"
-
-[Illustration: "In the third row Harding stood talking to a young man."]
-
-'Now, is that your idea of the scene?'
-
-A pained look came upon Hubert's face. 'Don't question me now, my dear
-fellow. I cannot fix my attention. I can see, however, that your make-up is
-capital--you are the man himself.'
-
-The actor was satisfied, and in his satisfaction he said, 'I think it will
-be all right, old chap.'
-
-Hubert hoped to reach his box without meeting critics or authors. The
-serving-maids bowed and smiled,--he was the author of the play. 'They'll
-think still more of me if the notices are right,' he thought, as he hurried
-upstairs, and from behind the curtain of his box he peeped down and counted
-the critics who edged their way down the stalls. Harding stood in the third
-row talking to a young man. He said, 'You mean the woman with the black
-hair piled into a point, and fastened with a steel circlet. A face of
-sheep-like sensuality. Red lips and a round receding chin. A large bosom,
-and two thin arms showing beneath the opera cloak, which she has not yet
-thrown from her shoulders. I do not know her--_une laideur attirante_. Many
-a man might be interested in her. But do you see the woman in the
-stage-box? You would not believe it, but she is sixty, and has only just
-begun to speak of herself as an old woman. She kept her figure, and had an
-admirer when she was fifty-eight.'
-
-'What has become of him?'
-
-'They quarrelled; two years ago he told her he hoped never to see her ugly
-old face again. And that delicate little creature in the box next to
-her--that pale diaphanous face?'
-
-'With a young man hanging over her whispering in her ear?'
-
-'Yes. She hates the theatre; it gives her neuralgia; but she attends all
-the first nights because her one passion is to be made love to in public.
-If her admirer did not hang over her in front of the box just as that man
-is doing, she would not tolerate him for a week.'
-
-At that moment the conversation was interrupted by a new-comer, who asked
-if he had seen the play when it was first produced.
-
-'Yes,' said Harding; 'I did.' And he continued his search for acquaintances
-amid white rows of female backs, necks, and half-seen profiles--amid the
-black cloth shoulders cut sharply upon the illumined curtain.
-
-'And what do you think of it? Do you think it will succeed this time?'
-
-'Ford will create an impression in the part; but I don't think the piece
-will run.'
-
-'And why? Because the public is too stupid?'
-
-'Partly, and partly because Price is only an intentionist. He cannot carry
-an idea quite through.'
-
-'Are you going to write about it?'
-
-'I may.'
-
-'And what will you say?'
-
-'Oh, most interesting things to be said. Let's take the case of Hubert
-Price ... Ah, there, the curtain is going up.'
-
-The curtain rolled slowly up, and in a small country drawing-room, in very
-simple but very pointedly written dialogue, the story of Mrs. Holmes'
-domestic misfortunes was gradually unfolded. It appeared that she had
-flirted with Captain Grey; he had written her some compromising letters,
-and she had once been to his rooms alone. So the Court had pronounced a
-decree _nisi_. But Mrs. Holmes had not been unfaithful to her husband. She
-had flirted with Captain Grey because her husband's attentions to a certain
-Mrs. Barrington had maddened her, and in her jealous rage had written
-foolish letters, and been to see Captain Grey.
-
-Hubert noticed that folk were still asking for their seats, and pushing
-down the very rows in which the most influential critics were sitting. They
-exchanged a salutation with their friends in the dress-circle, and, when
-they were seated, looked around, making observations regarding the
-appearance of the house; and all the while the actors were speaking. Hubert
-trembled with fear and rage. Would these people never give their attention
-to the stage? If they had been sitting by him, he could have struck them.
-Then a line turned into nonsense by the actress who played Mrs. Holmes was
-a lancinating pain; and the actor who played Captain Grey, played so slowly
-that Hubert could hardly refrain from calling from his box. He looked round
-the theatre, noticing the indifferent faces of the critics, and the women's
-shoulders seemed to him especially vacuous and imbecile.
-
-The principal scene of the second act was between Mrs. Holmes and the man
-who had divorced her. He has-been driven to drink by the vile behaviour of
-his second wife; he is ruined in health and in pocket, and has come to the
-woman he wronged to beg forgiveness; he knows she has learnt to love
-Captain Grey, but will not marry him, because she believes that once
-married always married. There is only one thing he can do to repair the
-wrong he has done--he will commit suicide, and so enable her to marry the
-man she loves. He tells her that he has bought the pistol to do it with,
-and the words, 'Not here! not here!' escape from her; and he answers, 'No,
-not here, but in a cab. I've got one at the door.' He goes out; Captain
-Grey enters, and Mrs. Holmes begs him to save her husband. While they are
-discussing how this is to be done, he re-enters, saying that his conscience
-smote him as he was going to pull the trigger. Will she forgive him? If she
-won't, he must make an end of himself. She says she will.
-
-In the third act Hubert had attempted to paint Mr. Holmes' vain efforts to
-reform his life. But the constant presence of Captain Grey in the
-household, his attempts to win Mrs. Holmes from her husband, and the
-drunken husband's amours with the servant-maid disgusted rather than
-horrified. In the fourth act the wretched husband admits that his
-reformation is impossible, and that, although he has no courage to commit
-suicide and set his wife free, he will return to his evil courses; they
-will sooner or later make an end of him. The slowness and deadly gravity
-with which Ford took this scene rendered it intolerable; and,
-notwithstanding the beauty of the conclusion, when the deserted wife, in
-the silence of her drawing-room, reads again Captain Grey's letter, telling
-her that he has left England for ever, and with another, the success of the
-play was left in doubt, and the audience filed out, talking, chattering,
-arguing, wondering what the public verdict would be.
-
-To avoid commiseration of heartless friends and the triumphant glances of
-literary enemies, Hubert passed through the door leading on to the stage.
-Scene-shifters were brutally pushing away what remained of his play; and
-the presence of Hamilton Brown, the dramatic author, talking to Ford, was
-at that moment particularly disagreeable. On catching sight of Hubert,
-Brown ran to him, shook him by the hand, and murmured some discreet
-congratulations. He preferred the piece, however, as it had been originally
-written, and suggested to Ford the advisability of returning to the first
-text. Then Ford went upstairs to take his paint off, and Hubert walked
-about the stage with Brown. Brown's insincerity was sufficiently
-transparent; but men in Hubert's position catch at straws, and he soon
-began to believe that the attitude of the public towards his play was not
-so unfavourable as he had imagined.
-
-Hubert tried to summon up a smile for the stage-door keeper, who, he
-feared, had heard that the piece had failed, and then the moment they got
-outside he begged Rose to tell him the exact truth. She assured him that
-Ford had said that he had always counted on a certain amount of opposition;
-but that he believed that the general public, being more free of prejudice
-and less sophisticated, would be impressed by the simple humanity of the
-play. The conversation paused, and at the end of an irritating silence he
-said, 'You were excellent, as good as any one could be in a part that did
-not suit them. Ah, if he had cast you for the adventuress, how you would
-have played it!...'
-
-'I'm so glad you are pleased. I hope my notices will be good. Do you think
-they will?'
-
-'Yes, your notices will be all right,' he answered, with a sigh.
-
-'And your notices will be all right too. No one can say what is going to
-succeed. There was a call after each of the last three acts.... I don't see
-how a piece could go better. It is the suspense....'
-
-'Ah, yes, the suspense!'
-
-They lingered on the landing, and Hubert said, 'Won't you come in for a
-moment?' She followed him into the room. His calm face, usually a perfect
-picture of repose and self-possession, betrayed his emotion by a certain
-blankness in the eyes, certain contractions in the skin of the forehead.
-'I'm afraid,' he said, 'there's no hope.'
-
-'Oh, you mustn't say that!' she replied. 'I think it went very well
-indeed.... I know I did nothing with the young girl. I oughtn't to have
-undertaken the part.'
-
-'You were excellent. If we only get some good notices. If we don't, I shall
-never get another play of mine acted.' He looked at her imploringly,
-thirsting for a woman's sympathy. But the little girl was thinking of
-certain effects which she would have made, and which the actress who had
-played the adventuress had failed to make.
-
-'I watched her all the time,' she said, 'following every line, saying all
-the time, "Oh yes, that's all very nice and very proper, my young woman;
-but it's not it; no, not at all--not within a hundred miles of it." I don't
-think she ever really touched the part--do you?' Hubert did not answer, and
-a quiver of distraction ran through the muscles of her face.
-
-'Why don't you answer me?'
-
-'I can't answer you,' he said abruptly. Then remembering, he added,
-'Forgive me; I can think of nothing now.' He hid his face in his hands, and
-sobbed twice--two heavy, choking sobs, pregnant with the weight of anguish
-lying on his heart.
-
-Seeing how much he suffered, she laid her hand on his shoulder. 'I am very
-sorry; I wish I could help you. I know how it tears the heart when one
-cannot get out what one has in one's brain.'
-
-Her artistic appreciation of his suffering only jarred him the more. What
-he longed for was some kind, simple-hearted woman who would say, 'Never
-mind, dear; the play was perfectly right, only they did not understand it;
-I love you better than ever.' But Rose could not give him the sympathy he
-wanted; and to be alone was almost a relief. He dared not go to bed; he sat
-looking into space. The roar of London hushed till it was no more than a
-faint murmur, the hissing of the gas grew louder, and still Hubert sat
-thinking, the same thoughts battling in his brain. He looked into the
-future, but could see nothing but suicide. His uncle? He had applied to him
-before for help; there was no hope there. Then he tramped up and down,
-maddened by the infernal hissing of the gas; and then threw himself into
-his arm-chair. And so a terrible night wore away; and it was not until long
-after the early carts had begun to rattle in the streets that exhaustion
-brought an end to his sufferings, and he rolled into bed.
-
-
-
-
-VI
-
-
-'What will ye 'ave to eat? Eggs and bacon?'
-
-'No, no!'
-
-'Well, then, 'ave a chop?'
-
-'No, no!'
-
-'Ye must 'ave something.'
-
-'A cup of tea, a slice of toast. I'm not hungry.'
-
-'Well, ye are worse than a young lady for a happetite. Miss Massey 'as sent
-you down these 'ere papers.'
-
-The servant-girl laid the papers on the bed, and Hubert lay back on his
-pillow, so that he might collect his thoughts. Stretching forth his hands,
-he selected the inevitable paper.
-
-'For those who do not believe that our English home life is composed
-mainly, if not entirely, of lying, drunkenness, and conjugal infidelity,
-and its sequel divorce, yester evening at the Queen's Theatre must have
-been a sad and dismal experience. That men and women who have vowed to love
-each other do sometimes prove false to their troth no reasonable man will
-deny. With the divorce court before our eyes, even the most enthusiastic
-believer in the natural goodness and ultimate perfectibility of human
-nature must admit that men and women are frail. But drunkenness and
-infidelity are happily not characteristic of our English homes. Then why,
-we ask, should a dramatist select such a theme, and by every artifice of
-dialogue force into prominence all that is mean and painful in an
-unfortunate woman's life? Always the same relentless method; the cold,
-passionless curiosity of the vivisector; the scalpel is placed under the
-nerve, and we are called upon to watch the quivering flesh. Never the kind
-word, the tears, the effusion, which is man's highest prerogative, and
-which separates him from the brute and signifies the immortal end for which
-he was created. We hold that it is a pity to see so much talent wasted, and
-it was indeed a melancholy sight to see so many capable actors and
-actresses labouring to----'
-
-'This is even worse than usual,' said Hubert; and glancing through half a
-column of hysterical commonplace, he came upon the following:--
-
-'But if this woman had succeeded in reclaiming from vice the man who
-unjustly divorced her, and who in his misery goes back to ask her
-forgiveness for pity's sake, what a lesson we should have had! And, with
-lightened and not with heavier hearts, we should have left the theatre
-comforted, better and happier men and women. But turning his back on the
-goodness, truth, and love whither he had induced us to believe he was
-leading us, the author flagrantly makes the woman contradict her whole
-nature in the last act; and, because her husband falls again, she, instead
-of raising him with all the tender mercies and humanities of wifehood,
-declares that her life has been one long mistake, and that she accepts the
-divorce which the Court had unjustly granted. The moral, if such a word may
-be applied to such a piece is this: "The law may be bad, but human nature
-is worse."'
-
-The other morning papers took the same view,--a great deal of talent wasted
-on a subject that could please no one. Hubert threw the papers aside, lay
-back, and in the lucid idleness of the bed his thoughts grew darker. It was
-hardly possible that the piece could survive such notices; and if it did
-not? Well, he would have to go. But until the piece was taken out of the
-bills it would be a weakness to harbour the ugly thought.
-
-There were, however, the evening papers to look forward to, and soon after
-midday Annie was sent to buy all that had appeared. Hubert expected to find
-in these papers a more delicate appreciation of his work. Many of the
-critics of the evening press were his personal friends, and nearly all were
-young men in full sympathy with the new school of dramatic thought. He read
-paper after paper with avidity; and Annie was sent in a cab to buy one that
-had not yet found its way so far north as Fitzroy Street. The opinion of
-this paper was of all importance, and Hubert tore it open with trembling
-fingers. Although more temperately written than the others, it was clearly
-favourable, and Hubert sighed a sweet sigh of relief. A weight was lifted
-from him; the world suddenly seemed to grow brighter; and he went to the
-theatre that evening, and, half doubting and half confidently, presented
-himself at the door of Montague Ford's dressing-room. The actor had not yet
-begun to dress, and was busy writing letters. He stretched his hand
-hurriedly to Hubert.
-
-'Excuse me, my dear fellow; I have a couple of letters to finish.'
-
-Hubert sat down, glancing nervously from the actor to the morning papers
-with which the table was strewn. There was not an evening paper there. Had
-he not seen them? At the end of about ten minutes the actor said,--
-
-'Well, this is a bad business; they are terribly down on us--aren't they?
-What do you think?'
-
-'Have you seen the evening papers--_The Telephone_, for instance?'
-
-'Oh yes, I've seen them all; but the evening papers don't amount to much.
-Stiggins's article was terrible. I am afraid he has killed the piece.'
-
-'Don't you think it will run, then?'
-
-'Well, that depends upon the public, of course. If they like it, I'll keep
-it on.'
-
-'How's the booking?'
-
-'Not good.' Montague Ford moved his papers absent-mindedly. At the end of a
-long silence he said, 'Even if the piece did catch on, it would take a lot
-of working up to undo the mischief of those articles. Of course you can
-rely on me to give it every chance. I shan't take it out of the bills if I
-can possibly help.'
-
-'There is my _Gipsy_.'
-
-'I have another piece ready to put into rehearsal; it was arranged for six
-months ago. I only consented to produce your play because--well, because
-there has been such an outcry lately about art.... Tremendous part for me
-in the new piece... I'm sure you'll like it.'
-
-The business did improve, but so very slowly that Hubert was afraid Ford
-would lose patience and take the play out of the bills. But while the fate
-of the play hung in the balance, Hubert's life was being rendered
-unbearable by duns. They had found him out, one and all; to escape being
-served was an impossibility; and now his table was covered with summonses
-to appear at the County Court. This would not matter if the piece once took
-the public taste. Then he would be able to pay every one, and have some
-time to rest and think. And there seemed every prospect of its catching on.
-Discussions regarding the morality of the play had arisen in the
-newspapers, and the eternal question whether men and women are happier
-married or unmarried had reached its height. Hubert spent the afternoon
-addressing letters to the papers, striving to fan the flame of controversy.
-Every evening he listened for Rose's footstep on the stairs.--How did the
-piece go?--Was there a better house? Money or paper?--Have you seen the
-notice in the ----?--First-rate, wasn't it?--That ought to do some
-good.--I've heard there was a notice in the ----, but I haven't seen it.
-Have you?--No; but So-and-so saw the paper, and said there was nothing in
-it. And, do you know, I hear there's going to be a notice in _The Modern
-Review_, and that So-and-so is writing it.
-
-Every post brought newspapers; the room was filled with newspapers--all
-kinds of newspapers--papers one has never heard of,--French papers, Welsh
-papers, North of England papers, Scotch and Irish papers. Hubert read
-columns about himself, anecdotes of all kinds,--where he was born, who were
-his parents, and what first induced him to attempt writing for the stage;
-his personal appearance, mode of life, the cut of his clothes; his
-religious, moral, and political views. Had he been the plaintiff in an
-action for criminal libel, greater industry in the collection and the
-fabrication of personal details could hardly have been displayed.
-
-But at these articles Hubert only glanced; he was interested in his piece,
-not in himself, and when Annie brought up _The Modern Review_ he tore it
-open, knowing he would find there criticism more fundamental, more
-searching. But as he read, the expression of hope which his face wore
-changed to one of pain pitiful to look upon. The article began with a
-sketch of the general situation, and in a tone of commiseration, of
-benevolent malice, the writer pointed out how inevitable it was that the
-critics should have taken Mr. Price, when _Divorce_ was first produced, for
-the new dramatic genius they were waiting for. 'There comes a moment,' said
-this caustic writer, 'in the affairs of men when the new is not only
-eagerly accepted, but when it is confounded with the original. Wearied by
-the old stereotyped form of drama, the critics had been astonished by a
-novelty of subject, more apparent than real, and by certain surface
-qualities in the execution; they had hailed the work as being original both
-in form and in matter, whereas all that was good in the play had been
-borrowed from France and Scandinavia. _Divorce_ was the inevitable product
-of the time. It had been written by Mr. Price, but it might have been
-written by a dozen other young men--granting intelligence, youth, leisure,
-a university education, and three or four years of London life--any one of
-a dozen clever young men who frequent West End drawing-rooms and dabble in
-literature might have written it. All that could be said was that the play
-was, or rather had been, _dans le mouvement_; and original work never is
-_dans le mouvement_. _Divorce_ was nothing more than the product of certain
-surroundings, and remembering Mr. Price's other plays, there seemed to be
-no reason to believe that he would do better. Mr. Price had tried his hand
-at criticism, and that was a sure sign that the creative faculty had begun
-to wither. His critical essays were not rich nor abundant in thought, they
-were not the skirmishing of a man fighting for his ideas, they were not
-preliminary to a great battle; they were at once vague and pedantic,
-somewhat futile, _les ébats d'un esprit en peine_, and seemed to announce
-a talent in progress of disintegration rather than of reconstruction.
-
-'Sometimes the critic's phrases seemed wet with tears; sometimes,
-abandoning his tone of commiseration, he would assume one of scientific
-indifference. The phenomenon was the commonest. There were dozens of Hubert
-Prices in London. The universities and the newspapers, working singly and
-in collaboration, turned them out by the dozen. And the mission of these
-men of intelligent culture seemed to be to _poser des lapins sur la jeune
-presse_. Each one came in turn with his little volume of poems, his little
-play, his little picture; all were men of "advanced ideas"; in other words,
-they were all _dans le mouvement_. There was the rough Hubert Price, who
-made mild consternation in the drawing-room, and there was the
-sophisticated Hubert Price, who cajoled the drawing-room; there was the
-sincere and the insincere, and the Price that suffered and the Price that
-didn't. Each one brought a different _nuance_, a thousand infinitesimal
-variations of the type, but, considered merely in its relation to art, the
-species may be said to be divided into two distinct categories. In the
-first category are those who rise almost at the first bound to a certain
-level, who produce quickly, never reaching again the original standard,
-dropping a little lower at each successive effort until their work becomes
-indistinguishable from the ordinary artistic commercialism of the time. The
-fate of those in the second category is more pathetic; they gradually
-wither and die away like flowers planted in a thin soil. Among these men
-many noble souls are to be found, men who have surrendered all things for
-love of their art, and who seemed at starting to be the best equipped to
-win, but who failed, impossible to tell how or why. Sometimes their failure
-turns to comedy, sometimes to tragedy. They may become refined, delicate,
-elderly bachelors, the ornaments of drawing-rooms, professional
-diners-out--men with brilliant careers behind them. But if fate has not
-willed that they should retire into brilliant shells; if chance does not
-allow them to retreat, to separate themselves from their kind, but
-arbitrarily joins them to others, linking their fate to the fate of others'
-unhappiness, disaster may and must accrue from the alliance; honesty of
-purpose, trueness of heart, deep love, every great, good, and gracious
-quality to be found in nature, will not suffice to save them.'
-
-The paper dropped from his hands, and he recollected all his failures.
-
-'Once I could do good work; now I can do neither good work nor bad. Were I
-a rich man, I should collect my scattered papers and write songs to be sung
-in drawing-rooms; but being a poor one, I must--I suppose I must get out.
-Positively, there is no hope,--debts on every side. Fate has willed me to
-go as went Haydon, Gerard de Nerval, and Maréchal. The first cut his
-throat, the second hanged himself, and the third blew out his brains.
-Clearly the time has come to consider how I shall make my exit. It is a
-little startling to be called upon so peremptorily to go.'
-
-In this moment of extreme dejection it seemed to Hubert that the writer of
-the article had told him the exact truth. He refused to admit the plea of
-poverty. It was of course hard to write when one is being harassed by
-creditors. But if he had had it in him, it would have come out. The critic
-had very probably told him the truth. He could not hope to make a living
-out of literature. He had not the strength to write the masterpiece which
-the perverse cruelty of nature had permitted him only to see, and he was
-hopelessly unfit for journalism. But in his simple, wholesome mind there
-was no bent towards suicide; and he scanned every horizon. Once again he
-thought of his uncle. Five years ago he had written, asking him for the
-loan of a hundred pounds. He had received ten. And how vain it would be to
-write a second time! A few pounds would only serve to prolong his misery.
-No; he would not drift from degradation to degradation.
-
-He only glanced at the letter which Annie had brought up with the copy of
-_The Modern Review_. It was clearly a lawyer's letter. Should he open it?
-Why not spare himself the pain? He could alter nothing; and in these last
-days---- Leaving the thought unfinished, he sought for his keys; he went to
-his box, unlocked it, and took out a small paper package. Of the fifty
-pounds he had received from Ford about twenty remained: he had been poorer
-before, but hardly quite so hopeless. He scanned every horizon--all were
-barred. The thought of suicide, and with it the instinctive shrinking from
-it, came into his mind again. Suppose he took, that very night, an overdose
-of chloral? He tried to put the thought from him, and returned, a little
-dazed and helpless, to his chair. Had the critic in _The Modern Review_
-told him the truth? Was he incapable of earning a living? It seemed so.
-Above all, was he incapable of finishing _The Gipsy_ as he intended? No;
-that he felt was a lie. Give him six months' quiet, free from worry and all
-anxiety, and he would do it. Many a year had passed since he had enjoyed a
-month of quiet; and glancing again at the letter on the table, he thought
-that perhaps at that very moment a score of gallery boys were hissing his
-play. Perhaps at that very moment Ford was making up his mind to announce
-the last six nights of _Divorce_. At a quarter to twelve he heard Rose's
-foot on the stairs. He opened the door.
-
-'How did the piece go to-night?'
-
-'Pretty well.'
-
-'Only pretty well? Won't you come in for a few minutes?... So the piece
-didn't go very well to-night?'
-
-'Oh yes, it did. I've seen it go better; but----'
-
-'Did you get a call?'
-
-'Yes, after the second act.'
-
-'Not after the third?'
-
-'No. That act never goes well. Harding came behind; I was speaking to him,
-and he said something which struck me as being very true. Ford, he said,
-plays the part a great deal too seriously. When the piece was first
-produced, it was played more good-humouredly by indifferent actors, who let
-the thing run without trying to bring out every point. Ford makes it as
-hard as nails. I think those were his exact words.'
-
-Hubert did not answer. At the end of a long silence he said,--
-
-'Did you hear anything about the last night's?'
-
-'No,' she said; 'I heard nothing of that.'
-
-'Ford appeared quite satisfied then?'
-
-'Yes, quite,' she answered, with difficulty; for his eyes were fixed on
-her, and she felt he knew she was not telling the truth. The conversation
-paused again, and to turn it into another channel she said, 'Why, you have
-not opened your letter!'
-
-'I can see it is a lawyer's letter, on account of some unpaid bill. If I
-could pay it, I would; but as I can't----'
-
-'You are afraid to open it,' said Rose.
-
-Ashamed of his weakness, Hubert opened the letter, and began to read. Rose
-saw that the letter was not such an one as he had expected, and a moment
-after his face told her that fortunate news had come to him. The signs of
-the tumult within were represented by the passing of the hand across the
-brow, as if to brush aside some strange hallucination, and the sudden
-coming of a vague look of surprise and fear into the eyes. He said,--
-
-'Read it! Read it!'
-
-Relieved of much detail and much cumbersome legal circumlocution, it was to
-the following effect:--That about three months ago Mr. Burnett had come up
-from his place in Sussex, and at the offices of Messrs. Grandly & Co. had
-made a will, in which he had disinherited his adopted daughter, Miss Emily
-Watson, and left everything to Mr. Hubert Price. There was no question as
-to the validity of the will; but Messrs. Grandly deemed it their duty to
-inform Mr. Hubert Price of the circumstances under which it had been made,
-and also of the fact that a few weeks before his death Mr. Burnett had told
-Mr. John Grandly, who was then staying with Mr. Burnett at Ashwood, that he
-intended adding a codicil, leaving some two or three hundred a year to Miss
-Watson. It was unfortunate that Mr. Burnett had not had time to do this;
-for Miss Watson was an orphan, eighteen years of age, and entirely
-unprovided for. Messrs. Grandly begged to submit these facts to the
-consideration of Mr. Hubert Price. Miss Watson was now residing at Ashwood.
-She was there with a friend of hers, Mrs. Bentley; and should Mr. Hubert
-Price feel inclined to do what Mr. Burnett had left undone, Messrs. Grandly
-would have very great pleasure in carrying his wishes into effect.
-
-'I'm not dreaming, am I?'
-
-'No, you are not. It is quite true. Your uncle has left his money to you. I
-am so glad; indeed I am. You will be able to finish your play, and take a
-theatre and produce it yourself if you like. I hope you won't forget me. I
-do want to play that part. You can't quite know what I shall do with it.
-One can't explain oneself in a scene here and there.... What are you
-thinking of?'
-
-'I'm thinking of that poor girl, Emily Watson. It comes very hard upon
-her.'
-
-'Who is she?'
-
-'The girl my uncle disinherited.'
-
-'Oh, she! Well, you can marry her if you like. That would not be a bad
-notion. But if you do, you'll forget all about me and Lady Hayward.'
-
-'No; I shall never forget you, Rose.' He stretched his hand to her; but,
-irrespective of his will, the gesture seemed full of farewell.
-
-'I'm so much obliged to you,' he said; 'had it not been for you, I might
-never have opened that letter.'
-
-'Even if you hadn't, it wouldn't have mattered; you would have heard of
-your good fortune some other way. But it is getting very late. I must say
-good-night. I hope you will have a pleasant time in the country, and will
-finish your play. Good-night.'
-
-Returning from the door, he stopped to think. 'We have been very good
-friends--that is all. How strangely determined she is!... More so than I
-am. She is bound to succeed. There is in her just that note of individual
-passion.... Perhaps some one will find her out before I have
-finished,--that would be a pity. I wonder which of us will succeed first?'
-
-Then the madness of good fortune came upon him suddenly; he could think no
-more of Rose, and had to go for a long walk in the streets.
-
-
-
-
-VII
-
-
-'Dearest Emily, you must prepare yourself for the worst.'
-
-'Is he dead?'
-
-'Yes; he passed away quite quietly. To look at him one would say he was
-asleep; he does not appear to have suffered at all.'
-
-'Oh, Julia, Julia, do you think he forgave me? I could not do what he asked
-me.... I loved him very dearly as a father, but I could not have married
-him.'
-
-'No, dear, you could not. Such a marriage would have been most unnatural;
-he was more than forty years older than you.'
-
-'I do not think he ever thought of such a thing until about a month or six
-weeks ago. You remember how I ran to you? I was as white as a ghost, and I
-trembled like a leaf. I could hardly speak.... You remember?'
-
-'Yes, I remember; and some hours after, when I came into this room, he was
-standing there, just there, on the hearth-rug; there was a fearful look of
-pain and despair on his face--he looked as if he was going mad. I never saw
-such a look before, and I never wish to see such a look again. And the
-effort he made to appear unconcerned when he saw me was perhaps the worst
-part of it. I pretended to see nothing, and walked away towards the window
-and looked out. But all the while I could feel that some terrible drama was
-passing behind me. At last I had to look round. He was sitting in that
-chair, his elbows on his knees, clasping his head with both hands, the old,
-gnarled fingers twined in the iron-grey hair. Then, unable to contain
-himself any longer, he rushed out of the room, out of the house, and across
-the park.'
-
-'You say that he passed away quietly; he did not seem to suffer at all?'
-
-'No, he never recovered consciousness.'
-
-'But do you think that my refusal to marry him had anything to do with his
-death?'
-
-'Oh no, Emily; a fit of apoplexy, with a man of his age, generally ends
-fatally.'
-
-'Even if I had known it all beforehand I don't think I could have acted
-differently. I could not have married him. Indeed I couldn't, Julia, not
-even if I knew I should save his life by doing so. I daresay it is very
-wicked of me, but----'
-
-'Dearest Emily, you must not give way to such thoughts; you did quite right
-in refusing to marry Mr. Burnett. It was very wrong of him even to think of
-asking you, and if he had lived he would have seen how wrong it was of him
-to desire such a thing.'
-
-'If he had lived! But then he didn't live, not even long enough to forgive
-me, and when we think of how much he suffered--I don't mean in dying, you
-say he passed away quietly, but all this last month how heart-broken he
-looked! You remember when he sat at the head of the table, never speaking
-to us, and how frightened I was lest I should meet him on the stairs; I
-used to stand at the door of my room, afraid to move. I know he suffered,
-poor old man. I was very, very sorry for him. Indeed I was, Julia, for I'm
-not selfish, and when I think now that he died without forgiving me, I
-feel, I feel--oh, I feel as if I should like to die myself. Why do such
-things happen to me? I feel just as miserable now as I used to when I lived
-with father and mother, who could not agree. I have often told you how
-miserable I was then, but I don't think you ever quite understood. I feel
-just the same now, just as if I never wanted to see any one or anything
-again. I was so unhappy when I was a child, they thought I would die, and I
-should have died if I had remained listening to father and mother any
-longer. ... Every one thought I was so lucky when Mr. Burnett decided to
-adopt me and leave me all his money, and he has done that, poor old man, so
-I suppose I should be happy; but I'm not.'
-
-The girl's eyes turned instinctively towards the window and rested for a
-moment on the fair, green prospects of the park.
-
-'I hated to listen to father and mother quarrelling, but I loved them, and
-I had not been here a year before father died, and darling mother was not
-long following him--only six months. Then I had no one: a few distant
-relatives, whom I knew nothing of, whom I did not care for, so I gave all
-my love to Mr. Burnett. He was so good to me; he never denied me anything;
-he gave me everything, even you, dearest Julia. When he thought I wanted a
-companion, he found you for me. I learnt to love you. You became my best
-and dearest friend. Then things seemed to brighten up, and I thought I was
-happy, when all this dreadful trouble came upon us. Don't let's speak of it
-more than we can help. I often wished myself dead. Didn't you, Julia?'
-
-Emily Watson told the story of her misfortunes in a low, musical voice,
-heedless of two or three interruptions, hardly conscious of her listener,
-impressed and interested by the fatality of circumstances which she
-believed in design against her. She was a small, slender girl of about
-eighteen. Her abundant chestnut hair--exquisite, soft, and silky--was
-looped picturesquely, and fastened with a thin tortoiseshell comb. The tiny
-mouth trembled, and the large, prominent eyes reflected a strange, yearning
-soul. She was dressed in white muslin, and the fantastically small waist
-was confined with a white band. Her friend and companion, Julia Bentley,
-was a woman of about thirty, well above the medium height, full-bosomed and
-small-waisted. The type was Anglo-Saxon even to commonplace. The face was
-long, with a look of instinctive kindness upon it. She was given to
-staring, and as she looked at Emily, her blue eyes filled with an
-expression which told of a nature at once affectionate and intelligent. She
-was dressed in yellow linen, and wore a gold bracelet on a well-turned arm.
-
-The room was a long, old-fashioned drawing-room. It had three windows, and
-all three were filled with views of the park, now growing pale in the
-evening air. The flower-gardens were drawn symmetrically about the house
-and were set with blue flower-vases in which there were red geraniums. It
-was a very large room, nearly forty feet long, with old portraits on the
-walls--ugly things and ill done; and where there were no portraits the
-walls were decorated with vine leaves and mountains. The parqueted floor
-was partially covered with skins, and the furniture seemed to have known
-many a generation; some of it was heavy and cumbersome, some of it was
-modern. There was a grand piano, and above it two full-length portraits--a
-lady in a blue dress and a man in black velvet knee-breeches. At the end of
-a long silence, Emily suddenly threw herself weeping into Julia's arms.
-
-'Oh, you are my only friend; you will not leave me now.... We shall always
-love one another, shall we not? If anything ever came between us it would
-kill me.... That poor old man lying dead up-stairs! He loved me very
-dearly, and I loved him, too. Yet I said just now I could not have married
-him even if I had known it would save his life. I was wrong; yes, I would
-have married him if I had known.... You don't believe me?'
-
-'My dearest girl, you must try to forget that Mr. Burnett ever entertained
-so foolish a thought. He was a very good man, and loved you for a long time
-as he should have loved you--as a daughter. We shall respect his memory
-best by forgetting the events of the last six weeks. And now, Emily, dinner
-will be ready at seven o'clock, and it is now six. What are you going to
-do?'
-
-'I shall go out for a little walk. I shall go down and see the swans.'
-
-'Shall I come with you?'
-
-'No, thank you, dear; I think I'd sooner be alone. I want to think.'
-
-Julia looked a moment anxiously at this fragile girl, whose tiny head was
-poised on a long, delicate neck like a fruit on its stem.
-
-'Yes, go for a walk, dear,' said Julia; 'it will do you good. Shall I go
-and fetch your hat and jacket?'
-
-'No, thank you, I will not trouble you; I'll go myself.'
-
-'No, Emily, I think you had better let me go.'
-
-'Oh, no; I am not afraid.'
-
-And she went up the wide oak staircase, thinking of the man who lay dead in
-the room at the end of the passage. She was conscious of a sense of dread;
-the house seemed to wear a strange air, and her dog, Dandy, was conscious
-of it, too; he was more silent, less joyful than usual. And when she came
-from her room, dressed to go out, instead of rushing down-stairs, barking
-with joy, he dropped his tail and lingered at the end of the passage. She
-called him; he still hesitated, and then, yielding to a sudden desire, she
-went down the passage and knocked at the door of the room. The nurse
-answered her knock.
-
-'Oh, don't come in, miss.'
-
-'Why not? I want to see him before he goes away for ever.'
-
-Upon the limp, white curtains of an old four-posted bed she saw the
-memorable profile--stern, unrelenting. How still he lay! Never would that
-face speak or laugh or see again. Although sixty-five, his head was covered
-with short, thick, iron-grey hair; the beard, too, was short and thick, and
-iron-grey. The face was rugged, and when Emily touched the coarse hand,
-telling of a life of toil, she started--it was singularly cold. Fear and
-sorrow in like measure choked her, and her soul awoke, and tremblingly she
-walked out of the house, glad to breathe the sweet evening air.
-
-She walked towards the artificial water. The sky was melancholy and grey,
-and the park lay before her, hushed and soundless. Through the shadows of
-the darkening island two swans floated softly, leaving behind slight silver
-lines; above, the swallows flew high in the evening. There was sensation of
-death, too, in this cold, mournful water, and in the silence that hung
-about it, and in some vague way it reminded Emily of her own life. She had
-known little else but death; her life seemed full of death; and those
-reflections, so distinct and so colourless, were like death.
-
-Then, in a sudden expansion of youth she wondered. Her own life, how
-strange, how personal, how intense! What did it mean, what meaning had it
-in the great, wide world? And the impressive tranquillity, the pale death
-of the day, lying like a flower on the water, seemed to symbolise her
-thought, and she felt more distinctly than she had ever done before. And
-there arose in her a nervous and passionate interest in herself. She seemed
-so strange, so wonderful. Her childhood was in itself an enigma. That sad
-and sorrowful childhood of hers, passed in that old London house; her
-mother's love for her; her cruel, stern stepfather, and the endless
-quarrels between her father and mother, which made her young life so
-unbearable, so wretched, that she could never think of those years without
-tears rising to her eyes. And then the going away, coming to live with Mr.
-Burnett! The death of her father and her dear mother, so sudden, following
-so soon one after the other. How much there had been in her life, how
-wonderful it was! Her love of Mr. Burnett, and then that bitter and
-passionate change in him! That proposal of marriage; could she ever forget
-it? And then this cruel and sudden death. Everything she had ever loved had
-been taken from her. Only Julia remained, and should Julia be taken from
-her, she felt that she must die. But that would not, could not, happen. She
-was now mistress of Ashwood, she was a great heiress; and she and Julia
-would live always together, they would always love one another, they would
-always live here in this beautiful place which they loved so well.
-
-
-
-
-VIII
-
-
-There were at the funeral a few personal friends who lived in the
-neighbourhood, the farmers on the estate, and the labourers; and when the
-little crowd separated outside the church, Emily and Julia walked back to
-Ashwood with Mr. Grandly, Mr. Burnett's intimate friend and solicitor. They
-returned through the park, hardly speaking at all, Emily absent-minded as
-usual, waving her parasol occasionally at a passing butterfly. The grass
-was warm and beautiful to look on, and they lingered, prolonging the walk.
-It was very good of Mr. Grandly to accompany them back; he might have gone
-on straight to the station, so Julia thought, and she was surprised indeed
-when, instead of bidding them good-bye at the front door, he said--
-
-'Before I return to London I have a communication to make to both you
-ladies. Will it suit you to come into the drawing-room with me?'
-
-'Perfectly, so far as I'm concerned; and you, Emily?'
-
-'Oh, I've nothing to do; but if it is about business, Julia will
-attend----'
-
-'I think you had better be present, Miss Watson.'
-
-Mr. Grandly was a tall, massive man with benevolent features; his bald,
-pink skull was partly covered with one lock of white hair. There was an
-anxious look in his pale, deep-set eyes which impressed Julia, and she
-said: 'I hope this communication you have to make to us is not of a painful
-nature. We have----'
-
-'Yes, Mrs. Bentley, I know that you have been severely tried lately, but
-there is no help for it. I cannot keep you in ignorance any longer of
-certain facts relating to Mr. Burnett's will.' The words 'will' and 'facts'
-struck on Emily's ear. She had been thinking about her fortune. The very
-ground she was walking on was hers. She was the owner of this beautiful
-park; it seemed like a fairy tale. And that house, that dear, old-fashioned
-house, that rambling, funny old place of all sizes and shapes, full of deep
-staircases and pictures, was hers. Her eyes wandered along the smooth wide
-drive, down to the placid water crossed by the great ornamental bridge, the
-island where she had watched the swans floating last night--all these
-things were hers. So the words 'will' and 'facts' and 'ignorance of them'
-jarred her clutching little dream, and she turned her eyes--they wore an
-anxious look--towards Mr. Grandly, and said with an authoritative air:
-'Yes, let us go into the drawing-room; I want to hear what Mr. Grandly has
-to say about----Let us go into the drawing-room at once.'
-
-Julia took the chair nearest to her. Emily stood at the window, waiting
-impatiently for Mr. Grandly to begin. He laid his hat on the parquet, wiped
-his forehead with his handkerchief, and drew an arm-chair forward. 'Mr.
-Burnett, as you know, made a will some years ago, in favour of his cousin
-and adopted daughter, Miss Emily Watson. In that will he left his entire
-fortune to her, Ashwood Park and all his invested money. No other person
-was mentioned in that will, except Miss Watson. It was I who drew up this
-will. I remember discussing its provisions with Mr. Burnett, and advising
-him to leave something, even if it were only a few hundred pounds, to his
-nephew, Hubert Price. But Mr. Burnett was always a very headstrong man; he
-had quarrelled with this young man, as he said, irreparably, and could not
-be induced to leave him even a hundred pounds. I thought this was harsh,
-and as Mr. Burnett's friend I told him so--I have always been opposed to
-extreme measures,--but he was not to be gainsaid. So the matter remained
-for many years; never did Mr. Burnett mention his nephew's name. I thought
-he had forgotten the young man's existence, when, suddenly, without
-warning, Mr. Burnett came into my office and told me that he intended to
-alter his will, leaving all his property to his nephew, Hubert Price. You
-know what old friends we were, and, presuming on our friendship, I told him
-what I thought of his project of disinheritance, for it amounted to that.
-Well, suffice it to say, we very nearly quarrelled over the matter. I
-refused to draw up the will, so iniquitous did it seem to me. He said:
-"Very well, Grandly, I'll go elsewhere." Then I remembered that if I
-allowed him to go elsewhere I should lose all hold over him, and I
-consented to draw up the will.'
-
-Emily listened, a vague expression of pain in her pathetic eyes. Then this
-house, this room where she was sitting, was not hers, and a strange man
-would come soon and drive her away!
-
-'And he has left Ashwood to Mr. Price, is not that his name?' she said,
-abruptly.
-
-'Yes; he has left Ashwood to Mr. Price.'
-
-'And when did he make this new will?'
-
-'I think it is just about a month ago.'
-
-Emily leaned forward, and her great eyes, full of light and sorrow, were
-fixed in space, her little pale hands linked, and the great mass of
-chestnut hair slipping from the comb. She was, in truth, at that moment the
-subject of a striking picture, and she was even more impressive when she
-said, speaking slowly: 'Then that old man was even wickeder than I thought.
-Oh, what I have learned in the last three or four weeks! Oh, what
-wickedness, what wickedness!... But go on,' she said, looking at Mr.
-Grandly; 'tell me all.'
-
-'I suppose there was some very serious reason, but on that point Mr.
-Burnett absolutely refused to answer me. He said his reasons were his own,
-and that he intended to leave his money to whom he pleased.'
-
-'There was----' Julia stopped short, and looked interrogatively at Emily.
-
-'Go on, Julia, tell him; we have nothing to conceal.'
-
-'Mr. Burnett asked Emily to marry him a short time ago; she, of course,
-refused, and ever since he seemed more like----'
-
-'A madman than anything else,' broke in Emily. 'Oh, for the last month we
-have led a miserable life! It was a happy release.'
-
-'Is it possible,' said Mr. Grandly, 'that Mr. Burnett seriously
-contemplated marriage with Miss Watson?'
-
-'Yes, and her refusal seemed to drive him out of his mind.'
-
-'I never was more surprised.' The placid face of the eminently respectable
-solicitor lapsed into contemplation. 'I often tried,' he said, suddenly,
-'to divine the reason why he changed his will. Disappointed love seemed the
-only conceivable reason, but I rejected it as being quite inconceivable.
-Well, it only shows how little we know what is passing in each other's
-minds.'
-
-'Then,' said Julia, 'Mr. Burnett has divided his fortune, leaving Ashwood
-to Mr. Price, and all his invested money to Emily?'
-
-A look of pain passed over Mr. Grandly's benevolent face, and he answered:
-'Unfortunately he has left everything to Mr. Price.'
-
-'I'm glad,' exclaimed Emily, 'that he has left me nothing. Once he thought
-fit to disinherit me because I would not marry him, I prefer not to have
-anything to do with his money.'
-
-Mr. Grandly and Julia looked at each other; they did not need to speak;
-each knew that the girl did not realise at once the full and irretrievable
-nature of this misfortune. The word 'destitute' was at present unrealised,
-and she only thought that she had been deprived of what she loved best in
-the world--Ashwood. Mr. Grandly glanced at her, and then speaking a little
-more hurriedly, said--
-
-'I was saying just now that I only consented to draw up the will so that I
-might be able at some future time to induce Mr. Burnett to add a codicil to
-it. Later on I spoke to him again on the subject, and he promised to
-consider it, and a few days after he wrote to me, saying that he had
-decided to take my advice and add a codicil. Subsequently, in another
-letter he mentioned three hundred a year as being the sum he thought he
-would be in honour bound to leave Miss Watson. Unfortunately, he did not
-live long enough to carry this intention into execution. But the letters he
-addressed to me on the subject exist, and I have every hope that the heir,
-Mr. Price, will be glad to make some provision for his cousin.'
-
-'Have you any reason for thinking that Mr. Price will do so?' said Julia.
-
-'No. But it seems impossible for any honourable man to act otherwise.'
-
-'He cannot bear enmity against Emily, who of course knew nothing of his
-quarrel with his uncle. Do you know anything about Mr. Price? What is he?
-Where does he live?'
-
-'He is a literary man, I believe. I have heard that he writes plays!'
-
-'Oh, a writer of plays.'
-
-'Yes. I am glad of it; he may be easier to deal with. I daresay it is a
-mistaken notion, but one is apt to imagine that these artist folk are more
-generous with their money than ordinary mortals.'
-
-'Is he married?' said Julia, and involuntarily she glanced toward Emily.
-
-Mr. Grandly, too, looked toward the girl, and then he said: 'I don't know
-if Mr. Price is married; I hope not.'
-
-'Why do you hope so?' said Emily, suddenly.
-
-'Because if he isn't, there will only be one person to deal with. If he had
-a wife, she would have a voice in the matter; and in such circumstances as
-ours a man is easier to deal with. I earnestly hope Mr. Hubert Price is not
-married, and shall consider it a great point in our favour if on returning
-to town I find he is not.' Then assuming a lighter tone, for the nervous
-strain of the last ten minutes had been intense, he said: 'If he is not
-married, who knows--you may take a fancy to him, and he to you; then things
-would be just the same as before--only better.'
-
-'I should not marry him--I hate him already. I wonder how you can think of
-such a thing, Mr. Grandly? You know that he must be a very wicked man for
-uncle to have disinherited him. I have always heard that--but I don't know
-what I am saying.' Tears welled up into her eyes. 'I daresay my cousin is
-not so bad as--but I can talk no more.... I am very miserable, I have
-always been miserable, and I don't know why; I never did harm to any one.'
-
-Soon after Mr. Grandly bade the ladies good-bye. Julia followed him to the
-front door. 'You will do all you can to help us? That poor child is too
-young, too inexperienced, to realise what her position is.'
-
-'I know, I know,' said Mr. Grandly, extending both hands to Julia; 'in the
-whole course of my experience I never met with a sadder case. But we must
-not take too sad a view of it. Perhaps all will come right in the end. The
-young man cannot refuse to make good his uncle's intentions. He cannot see
-his cousin go to the workhouse. I will do the best I can for you. The
-moment I get back to London, I'll set inquiries on foot and find out his
-address, and when I have seen him I'll write. Good-bye.'
-
-Then, resolving that it were better to leave the girl to herself, Julia
-took up her key-basket and hurried away on household business. But in the
-middle of her many occupations she would now and then stop short to think.
-She had never heard of anything so cruel before. That poor girl--she must
-go to her; she must not leave her alone any longer. But it would be well to
-avoid the subject as much as possible. She must think of something to
-distract her thoughts. The pony-chaise. It might be the last time they had
-a carriage to go out in. But they could not go out driving on the day of
-the funeral.
-
-That evening, as they were going to bed, Emily said, lifting her sweet,
-pathetic little face, looking all love and gentleness: 'Oh, to think of a
-common, vulgar writer coming here, with a common, vulgar wife and a horrid
-crowd of children. Oh, Julia, doesn't it seem impossible? And yet I suppose
-it is true. I cannot bear to think of it. I can see the horrid children
-tramping up and down the stairs, breaking the things we have known and
-loved so long; and they will destroy all my flowers, and no one will
-remember to feed the poor swans. Dandy, my beloved, I shall be able to take
-you with me.' And she caught up the rough-haired terrier and hugged him,
-kissing his dear old head. 'Dandy is mine; they can't take him from me, can
-they? But do you think the swans belong to them or to us? I suppose it
-would be impossible to take them with us if we go to live in London. They
-couldn't live in a backyard.'
-
-'But, dearest Emily, who are "they"? You don't know that he is
-married--literary men don't often marry. For all you know, he is a handsome
-young man, who will fall madly in love with you.'
-
-'No one ever fell in love with me except that horrid old man--how I hate
-him, how I detest to think of it! I thought I should have died when he
-asked to marry me. The very memory of it is enough to make me hate all men,
-and prevent me from liking any one. I don't think I could like him; I
-should always see that wicked old man's hoary, wrinkled face in his.'
-
-'Oh, Emily, I cannot think how such ideas can come into your head. It is
-not right, indeed it isn't.' And this simple Englishwoman looked at this
-sensitive girl in sheer wonderment and alarm.
-
-'I only say what I think. I am glad the old man did disinherit me. I'm glad
-we are leaving Ashwood; I cannot abide the place when I think of him....
-There, that is his chair. I can see him sitting in it now. He is grinning
-at us; he is saying, "Ha! ha! I have made beggars of you both." You
-remember how we used to tremble when we met his terrible old face on the
-stairs; you remember how he used to sit glaring at us all through dinner?'
-
-'Yes, Emily, I remember all that; but I do not think it natural that you
-should forget all the years of kindness; he was very good to you, and loved
-you very much, and if he forgot himself at the end of his life, we must
-remember the weakness of age.'
-
-'The hideousness of age,' Emily replied, in a low tone. The conversation
-paused, and then Julia said--
-
-'You are speaking wildly, Emily, and will live to regret your words. Let us
-speak no more of Mr. Burnett... I daresay you will find your cousin a
-charming young man. I should laugh if it were all to end in a marriage. And
-how glad I should be to see you off on your honeymoon, to bid you
-good-bye!'
-
-'Oh, Julia, don't speak like that; you will never bid me good-bye. You will
-never leave me--promise me that--you are my only friend. Oh, Julia, promise
-me that you will never leave me.'
-
-Tears rose in Julia's eyes, and taking the girl in her arms, she said,
-'I'll never leave you, my dear girl, until you yourself wish it.'
-
-'I wish it? Oh, Julia, you do not know me. I have lost everything, Julia,
-but I mustn't lose you... After all, it doesn't so much matter, so long as
-we are not separated. I don't care about money, and we can have a nice
-little house in London all to ourselves. And if we get too hard up, we'll
-both go out as daily governesses. I think I could teach a little music, to
-young children, you know; you'd teach the older ones.' Emily looked at
-Julia inquiringly, and going over to the piano, attempted to play her
-favourite polka. Julia, who had once worked for her daily bread, and earned
-it in a sort of way by giving music-lessons, smiled sadly at the girl's
-ignorance of life.
-
-'I see,' said Emily, who was quick to divine every shade of sentiment
-passing in the minds of those she loved; 'you don't think I could teach
-even the little children.'
-
-'My dear Emily, I hope it will never come to your having to try.'
-
-'I must do something to get a living,' she replied, looking vaguely and
-wistfully into the fire. 'How unfortunate all this is--that horrid, horrid
-old man. But supposing he had asked you to marry him--he wasn't nice, but
-you are older than I, and if you had married him you would have become, in
-a way, my stepmother. But what a charming stepmother! Oh, how I should have
-loved that!'
-
-'Come, Emily, it is time to go to bed; you let your imagination run away
-with you.'
-
-'Julia, you are not cross because----'
-
-'No, dear, I'm not cross. I'm only a little tired. We have talked too
-long.'
-
-Emily's allusion to music-teaching had revived in Julia all her most
-painful memories. If this man were to cast them penniless out of Ashwood!
-Supposing, supposing that were to happen? Starving days, pale and haggard,
-rose up in her memory. What should she do, what should she do, and with
-that motherless girl dependent on her for food and clothes and shelter? She
-buried her face in the pillow and prayed that she might be saved from such
-a destiny.
-
-If this man--this unknown creature--were to refuse to help them, she and
-Emily would have to go to London, and she would have to support Emily as
-best she might. She would hold to her and fight for her with all her
-strength, but would she not fall vanquished in the fight; and then, and
-then? The same thoughts, questions, and fears turned in her head like a
-wheel, and it was not until dawn had begun to whiten the window-panes that
-she fell asleep.
-
-A few days after, the post brought a letter for Julia. After glancing
-hastily down the page she said: 'This is a letter from Mr. Grandly, and it
-is good news. Oh, what a relief!...'
-
-'Read it.'
-
-'"Dear Mrs. Bentley,--Immediately I arrived in London, I set to work to
-find out Mr. Price's address. It was the easiest matter in the world, for
-he has a play now running at one of the theatres. So I directed my letter
-to the theatre, and next morning I had a visit from him. After explaining
-to him the resources of the brilliant fortune he had come into, I told him
-of his uncle's intention to add a codicil to his will, leaving Miss Watson
-three hundred a year; I told him that this last will had left her entirely
-unprovided for. He said, at once, that he fully agreed with me, and that he
-would consider what was the most honourable course for him to take in
-regard to his 'cousin. This is exactly what he said, but his manner was
-such that before leaving he left no doubt in my mind whatever that he will
-act very generously indeed. I should not be surprised if he settled even
-more than the proposed three hundred a year on Miss Watson. He is a very
-quiet, thoughtful young man of about two or three and thirty. He looks
-poor, and I fancy he has lived through very hard times. He wears an air of
-sadness and disappointment which makes him attractive, and his manners are
-gentle and refined. I tell you these things, for I know they will interest
-you. I have not been able to find out if he is married, but I am sorry to
-say that his play has not succeeded. I should have found out more, but he
-was not in my office above ten minutes; he had to hurry away to keep an
-appointment at the theatre, for, as he explained, it was to be decided that
-very day if the play was to be taken out of the bills at the end of the
-week. He promised to call again, and our interview is fixed for eleven
-o'clock the day after to-morrow. In the meantime take heart, for I think I
-am justified in telling you I feel quite sanguine as to the result."'
-
-'Well,' said Julia, laying down the letter, 'I don't think that anything
-could be more satisfactory, and just fancy dear old Mr. Grandly being able
-to describe a young man as well as that.'
-
-'He doesn't say if he is short or tall, or dark or fair.'
-
-'No, he doesn't. I think he might have told us something about his personal
-appearance, but it is a great relief to hear that he is not the vulgar
-Bohemian we have always understood him to be. Mr. Grandly says his manners
-are refined; you might take a fancy to him after all.'
-
-'But you don't know that he isn't married. I suppose Mr. Grandly wasn't
-able to find that out. I should like to know--but not because I want to
-marry him or any one else; only I don't like the idea of a great, vulgar
-woman, and a pack of children scampering about the place when we go.'
-
-'Do you dislike children so much, then, Emily?'
-
-'I don't know that I ever thought about them; but I'm sure I shouldn't like
-his children. I dreamt of him last night. Do you believe in dreams?'
-
-'What did you dream?'
-
-'I cannot remember, but I woke up crying, feeling more unhappy than I ever
-felt in my life before. It is curious that I should dream of him last
-night, and that you should receive that letter this morning, isn't it?'
-
-'I don't see anything strange in it. Nothing more natural than that you
-should dream about him, and it was certain that I should receive a letter
-from Mr. Grandly; he promised to write to me in a few days.'
-
-'Then you believe what is in that letter--I don't. Something tells me that
-he will not act kindly, but I don't know how.'
-
-'I'm quite sure you are wrong, Emily. Mr. Grandly would never have written
-this letter unless he knew for certain that Mr. Price would do all or more
-than he promised.'
-
-'I can't see from the letter that he has promised anything... Even if he
-does give me three hundred a year, I shall have to leave Ashwood.'
-
-'My dear Emily, I'm cross with you: of course, if you will insist on always
-looking at the melancholy side.... Now I'm going; I've to see after the
-housekeeping. Are you going into the garden?'
-
-'Yes, presently.'
-
-Emily did not seem to know what she was going to do. She looked out of the
-window, she lingered in the corridor; finally she wandered into the
-library. The quaint, old-fashioned room recalled her childhood to her. It
-was here she used to learn her lessons. Here was the mahogany table, at
-which she used to sit with her governess, learning to read and write; and
-there, far away at the other end of the long room, was the round table,
-where lay the old illustrated editions of _Gulliver's Travels_ and _The
-Arabian Nights_, which she used to run to whenever her governess left the
-room. And at the bottom of the book-cases there were drawers full of
-strange papers; these drawers she used to open in fear and trembling, so
-mysterious did they seem to her. And there was the book-cases full of the
-tall folios, behind which lay, in dark and dim recesses, stores of books
-which she used to pull out, expecting at every moment to come upon
-long-forgotten treasures. She smiled now, as she recalled these childish
-imaginings, and lifting tenderly the coarse drugget, she looked at the
-great green globe which her fingers used to turn in infantile curiosity.
-
-Then leaving the library, she roamed through the house, pausing on the
-first landing to gaze on the picture of the fine gentleman in a red coat,
-his hand for ever on his sword. She remembered how she used to wonder whom
-he was going to kill, and how sure she used to feel that at last he would
-grant his adversary his life. And close by was the picture of the
-wind-mill, set on the edge of the down, with the shepherd driving sheep in
-the foreground. Her whole life seemed drenched with tears at the thought of
-parting with these things. Every room was full of memories for her. She was
-a little girl when she came to live at Ashwood, and the room at the top of
-the stairs had been her nursery. There were the two beds; both were now
-dismantled and bare. It was in the little bed in the corner that she used
-to sleep; it was in the old four-poster that her nurse slept. And there was
-the very place, in front of the fire, where she used to have her tea. The
-table had disappeared, and the grate, how rusty it was! In the far corner,
-by the window, there used to be a press, in which nurse kept tea and sugar.
-That press had been removed. The other press was there still, and throwing
-open the doors she surveyed the shelves. She remembered the very peg on
-which her hat and jacket used to hang. And the long walks in the great
-park, which was to her, then, a world of wonderment!
-
-She wandered about the old corridor, in and out of odd rooms, all
-associated with her childhood--quaint old rooms, many of them lumber rooms,
-full of odd corners and old cupboards, the meaning of which she used to
-strive to divine. How their silence and mystery used to thrill her little
-soul! Faded rooms whose mystery had departed, but whose gloom was haunted
-with tenderest recollections. In one corner was the reading-chair in which
-Mr. Burnett used to sit. At that time she used to sit on his knee, and when
-the chair gave way beneath their weight, he had said she was too big a girl
-to sit on his knee any longer. The words had seemed to her a little cruel.
-She had forgotten the old chair, but now she remembered the very moment
-when the servants came to take it away.
-
-Under the window were some fragments of a china bowl which she had broken
-when quite a little child. There was a hoop-stick and the hoop which had
-been taken down to the blacksmith's to be mended. He had mended it, but she
-did not remember ever using it again. And there was an old box of
-water-colours, with which she used to colour all the uncoloured drawings in
-her picture-books. Emily took the hoop-stick, the old doll, and the broken
-box of water-colours, and packed them away carefully. She would be able to
-find room for them in the little house in London where she and Julia were
-going to live.
-
-A few days after, the post brought letters from Mr. Grandly, one for Emily
-and one for Julia. Julia's letter ran as follows:
-
-'Dear Mrs. Bentley,---I write by this post to Miss Watson, advising her
-that her cousin, Mr. Price, is most anxious to make her acquaintance, and
-asking her to send the dog-cart to-morrow to meet him at the station. I
-must take upon myself the responsibility for this step. I have seen Mr.
-Price again, and he has confirmed me in my good opinion of him. He seems
-most anxious, not only to do everything right, but to make matters as
-pleasant and agreeable as possible for his cousin. He has written me a
-letter recognising Miss Watson's claim upon him, and constituting himself
-her trustee. I have not had yet time to prepare a deed of gift, but there
-can be little doubt that Miss Watson's position is now quite secure. So far
-so good; but more than ever does the only clear and satisfactory way out of
-this miserable business seem to me to be a marriage between Mr. Hubert
-Price and Miss Watson. I have already told you that he is a nice, refined
-young man, of gentlemanly bearing, good presence, and excellent speech,
-though a trifle shy and reserved; and, as I have since discovered that he
-is not married, I have taken upon myself the responsibility of advising him
-to jump into a train and to go and tell his cousin the conclusion he has
-come to regarding the will of the late Mr. Burnett. As I have said, he is a
-shy man, and it was some time before I could induce him to take so decisive
-a step; he wanted to meet Miss Watson in my office, but I succeeded in
-persuading him. He will go down to you to-morrow by the five o'clock, and I
-need not impress upon you the necessity that you should use your influence
-with Miss Watson, and that his reception should be as cordial as
-circumstances permit. I have only to add that I see no need that you should
-show this letter to Miss Watson, for the very fact of knowing that we
-desired to bring about a marriage might prejudice her against this young
-man, whom she otherwise cannot fail to find charming.'
-
-Hearing some one at her door, Julia put the letter away. It was Emily.
-
-'I've just received a letter from Mr. Grandly, saying that that man is
-coming here to-day, and that we are to send the dog-cart for him.'
-
-'Is not that the very best thing that----'
-
-'We cannot remain here, we must leave a note for him, or something of that
-kind. I wouldn't remain here to meet him for worlds. I really couldn't,
-Julia.'
-
-'And why not, Emily?'
-
-'To meet the man who is coming to turn me out of Ashwood!'
-
-'How do you know that he is coming to turn you out of Ashwood? You imagine
-these things.... Do you suppose that Mr. Grandly would send him down here
-if he did not know what his intentions were?'
-
-'But we shall have to leave Ashwood.'
-
-'Very likely, but not in the way you imagine. Remember, Mr. Price is your
-cousin; you may like him very much. Let's be guided by Mr. Grandly; I have
-not seen your letter, but apparently he advises us to remain here and
-receive him.'
-
-'I don't think I can, Julia. I have misgivings.'
-
-'Have you been dreaming again?'
-
-'No; I've not been dreaming, but I have misgivings.'
-
-'You are a silly little goose, Emily. Come and give me a kiss, and promise
-to take my advice.'
-
-'Dearest Julia, you do love me, don't you? Promise me that we shall not be
-separated, and then I don't mind.'
-
-'Yes, dear, I promise you that, and you will promise me to try to like your
-cousin?'
-
-'I'll try, Julia, but I'm awfully frightened, and--I don't think I could
-like him, no matter what he was like. I feel a sort of hatred in my heart.
-Don't you know what I mean?' And the girl looked questioningly into her
-friend's eyes.
-
-
-
-
-IX
-
-
-'I am Miss Watson,' she said in her low musical voice, 'and this is my
-friend, Mrs. Bentley.' Hubert bowed, and sought for words. He found none,
-and the irritating silence was broken again by Miss Watson. 'Won't you sit
-down?' she said.
-
-'Thank you.' He pulled off his gloves. The pained, troubled look which he
-had met in Miss Watson's face seemed a reproach, and he regretted not
-having followed his own idea, and invited the young lady to meet him at Mr.
-Grandly's office. He glanced nervously from one lady to the other.
-
-'I hope you have had a pleasant journey, Mr. Price,' said Mrs. Bentley.
-'The country is looking very beautiful just at present. Do you know this
-part of the country?' Mrs. Bentley's words were very welcome, and Hubert
-replied eagerly--
-
-'No; I do not know the country at all well. I have been very little out of
-London for some years, but I hope now to see more of the country. This is a
-beautiful place.'
-
-At that moment he met Mrs. Bentley's eyes, and, feeling that he was
-touching on delicate ground, he stopped speaking. When he turned his head,
-he met Miss Watson's great sad eyes, which seemed to absorb the entire
-face, fixed upon him. They expressed such depth of pathetic appeal that he
-trembled with apprehension, and the instinct in him was to beg for pardon.
-But it became suddenly necessary to say something, and, speaking at random,
-his head full of whirling words, he said--
-
-'Of course nothing could be more sad than my poor uncle's death,--so
-unexpected... Having lived so long together, you must have----' Then it was
-Hubert's turn to look appealingly at Miss Watson; but her great eyes seemed
-to say, 'Go on, go on; heap cruelty on cruelty!' Then he plunged
-desperately, hoping to retrieve his mistakes. 'He died about a month ago.
-Mr. Grandly told me I should still find you here, so I thought----'
-
-The intensity of his emotion perhaps caused Hubert to accentuate his words,
-so that they conveyed a meaning different from that which he intended.
-Certainly his hesitations were capable of misinterpretation, and Miss
-Watson said, her voice trembling,--
-
-'Of course we know we have no right here, we are intruding; but we are
-making preparations.... I daresay that to-morrow we shall be able to----'
-
-'Oh, I beg pardon, Miss Watson; let me assure you ... I am sorry if----'
-
-Taking a little handkerchief out of her black dress, Emily covered her face
-in her thin, tiny hands. She sobbed aloud, and ran out of the room. Hubert
-turned to Mrs. Bentley, his face full of consternation.
-
-'I am very sorry, but she did not give me time to speak. Will you go and
-fetch her, Mrs. Bentley? I want to tell her I hope she will never leave
-Ashwood. ... I believe she thinks that I came down here to ask her to leave
-as soon as possible. It is really quite awful that she should think such a
-thing.'
-
-'She is an exceedingly sensitive girl, and is now a little overwrought. The
-events of the last month have proved too much for her.'
-
-'Mr. Grandly informed me that it was Mr. Burnett's intention to add a
-codicil to his will, leaving Miss Watson three hundred a year. This money I
-am prepared to give her, and I'm quite sure she is welcome to stay here as
-long as she pleases. Indeed, she will do me a great favour by remaining.
-Please go and tell her. I cannot bear to see a girl cry; to hear her sob
-like that is quite terrible.'
-
-'You will be able to tell her yourself during the course of the evening. I
-think it will come better from you.'
-
-'After what has happened, it will be very difficult for me to meet her
-until she is informed that she is mistaken. I charged Mr. Grandly to
-explain everything in his letter. Apparently he omitted to do so.'
-
-'He only said you wanted to see Emily on a matter of business. Of course we
-did not expect such generosity.'
-
-They were standing quite close together, and suddenly Hubert became
-conscious of Mrs. Bentley's beauty. Her blue eyes were at that moment full
-of tender admiration for the instinctive generosity which Hubert so
-unwittingly exhibited, and her eyes told what was passing in her soul.
-Suddenly they both seemed to understand each other better, and, playing
-with the bracelet on her arm, she said--
-
-'You do not know Emily; she is strangely sensitive. But I will go and try
-to persuade her to return.... Although only distantly related, you are
-cousins, after all--are you not?'
-
-'Yes, we are cousins, but the relationship is remote. Tell her everything;
-beg of her to come down-stairs.'
-
-Hubert imagined Emily's little black figure thrown upon her bed, sobbing
-convulsively. He was very much agitated, and looked about the room, at
-first hardly seeing it. At last its novelty drew his thoughts from his
-cousin's tears, and he wondered what was the history of the house. 'The old
-man,' he thought, 'bought it all, furniture and ancestors, from some ruined
-landowner, and attempted very few alterations--that's clear.' Then he
-reproached himself. 'How could I have been so stupid? I did not know what I
-was saying. I was so horribly nervous. Those strange eyes of hers quite
-upset me. I do hope Mrs. Bentley will tell her that I wish to act
-generously, that I am prepared to do everything in my power to make her
-happy. Poor little thing! She looks as if she had never been happy.' Again
-the room drew Hubert's thoughts away from his cousin. It was still lit with
-the faint perfumed glow of the sunset. The paint of the old decorations was
-cracked and faded. A man in a plum-coloured coat with gold facings fixed
-his eyes upon him, and the tall lady in blue satin had no doubt played
-there in short clothes. He walked up and down, he turned over the music on
-the piano, and, hearing a step, looked round. It was only the servant
-coming to tell him that his room was ready.
-
-He dressed for dinner, hoping to find the two ladies in the drawing-room,
-and it was a disappointment to find only Mrs. Bentley there.
-
-'I have told Emily everything you said. She is very grateful, and begs of
-me to thank you for your kind intentions. But I am afraid you must excuse
-her absence from dinner. I really don't think she is in a fit state to come
-down; she couldn't possibly take part in the conversation.'
-
-'But why? I hope she isn't ill? Had we better send for the doctor?'
-
-'Oh no; she'll be all right in the morning. She has been crying. She
-suffers from depression of spirits. She is, I assure you, all right,' said
-Mrs. Bentley, replying to Hubert's alarmed and questioning face. 'I assure
-you there is no need for you to reproach yourself. Dinner is ready.' She
-took his arm, and they went into the dining-room.
-
-No further mention was made of Mr. Burnett, of money matters, or of the
-young lady up-stairs; and with considerable tact Mrs. Bentley introduced
-the subject of literature, alluding gracefully to Hubert's position as a
-dramatist.
-
-'Your play, _Divorce_, is now running at the Queen's Theatre?'
-
-No; I'm sorry to say it was taken out of the bills last Saturday. Saturday
-night was the last performance.'
-
-'That was not a long run. And the papers spoke so favourably of it.'
-
-'It is a play that only appeals to the few.' And, encouraged by Mrs.
-Bentley's manner, Hubert told her how happy endings and comic love-scenes
-were essential to secure a popular success.
-
-'I am afraid you will think me very stupid, but I do not quite understand.'
-
-In a quiet, unobtrusive way Hubert was a graceful talker, and he knew how
-to adapt his theme, and bring it within the circle of the sympathies of his
-listeners. There was some similarity of temperament between himself and
-Mrs. Bentley; they were both quiet, fair, meditative Saxons. She lent her
-whole mind to the conversation, interested in the account that the young
-man gave of his dramatic aspirations.
-
-From the dining-room window looking over the park the long road wound
-through the vaporous country. The town stood in the middle distance, its
-colour blotted out, and its smoke hardly distinguishable. In the room a
-yellow dress turned grey, and the gold of a bracelet grew darker, and the
-pink of delicate finger-nails was no longer visible. But the pensive dusk
-of the dining-room, which blackened the claret in the decanters, leaving
-only the faintest ruby glow in the glass which Hubert raised to his lips,
-suited the tenor of the conversation, which had wandered from the dramatic
-to the social side of the question. What did he think of divorce? She
-sighed, and he wondered what her story might be.
-
-They passed out of the dining-room, and stood on the gravel, watching the
-night gathering in the open country. In the light of the moon, which had
-just risen above the woods, the white road grew whiter, the town was
-faintly seen in the tide of blue vapour, which here and there allowed a
-field to appear. In the foreground a great silver fir, spiky and solitary,
-rose up in the blue night. Beyond it was seen a corner of the ornamental
-bridge. The island and its shadow were one black mass rising from the park
-up to the level of the moon, which, a little to the right, between the town
-and the island, lay reflected in a narrow strip of water. Farther away some
-reeds were visible in the illusive light, and the meditative chatter of
-dozing ducks stirred the silence which wrapped the country like a cloak.
-
-Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood looking at the landscape. The fragrance of
-his cigar, the presence of the woman, the tenderness of the hour, combined
-to make him strangely happy; his past life seemed to him like a harsh,
-cruel pain that had suddenly ceased. More than he had ever desired seemed
-to be fulfilled; the reality exceeded the dream. What greater happiness
-than to live here, and with this woman! His thoughts paused, for he had
-forgotten the girl up-stairs. She was not happy; but he would make her
-happy--of that he was quite certain. At that moment Mrs. Bentley said--
-
-'I hope you like your home. Is not the prospect a lovely one?'
-
-'Yes; but I was thinking at that moment of Emily. I suppose I must accustom
-myself to call her by her Christian name. She is my cousin, and we are
-going to live together. But, by the way, she cannot stay here alone. I
-hope--I may trust that you will remain with her?'
-
-Mrs. Bentley turned her face towards him; he noticed the look of pleasure
-that had passed into it.
-
-'Thank you; it is very good of you. I shall be glad to remain with Emily as
-long as she cares for my society. It is needless to say I shall do my best
-to deserve your approval.'
-
-[Illustration: "They dined at the Café Royal."]
-
-Her voice fell, and he heard her sigh, and in his happiness it seemed to
-him to be a pity that he should find unhappiness in others.
-
-They went into the drawing-room. Mrs. Bentley asked him if he liked music,
-and she went to the piano and sang some Scotch songs very sweetly. Then she
-took a book from the table and bade him good-night. She was sure that he
-would excuse her. She must go and see after Emily.
-
-When the door closed, the woman who had just left him seemed like some one
-he had seen in a dream; and still more shadowy and illusive did the girl
-seem--that pale and plaintive beauty, looking like a pastel, who had so
-troubled him with her enigmatic eyes! And the lodging-house that he had
-left only a few hours ago! and Rose.
-
-On Sunday he had taken Rose out to dinner. They dined at the Café-Royal. He
-had tried to talk to her about Hamilton Brown's new drama, which they had
-just heard would follow _Divorce_; but he was unable to detach his thoughts
-from Ashwood and the ladies he was going to visit to-morrow evening. Hubert
-and Rose had felt like two school-fellows, one of whom is leaving school;
-the link that had bound them had snapped; henceforth their ways lay
-separate; and they were sad at parting just as school-friends are sad.
-
-'You are not rich; you offered to lend me money once. I want to lend you
-some now.'
-
-'Oh yes; five shillings, wasn't it?'
-
-'It doesn't matter what the sum was--we were both very poor then----'
-
-'And I'm still poorer now.'
-
-'All the more reason why you should allow me to help you.... Allow me to
-write you a cheque for a hundred pounds. I assure you I can afford it.'
-
-'I think I had better not.... I have some things I can sell.'
-
-'But you must not sell your things. Indeed, you must allow me----'
-
-'I think I'd rather not. I shall be all right--that is to say, if Ford
-engages me for Brown's new piece; and I think he will.'
-
-'But if he doesn't?'
-
-'Then,' she said, with a sweet and natural smile, 'I'll write to you.... We
-have been excellent friends--comrades--have we not?'
-
-'Yes, we have indeed, and I shall never forget. There is my address; that
-will always find me.'
-
-He had written a play--a play that the most competent critics had
-considered a work of genius; in any case, a play that had interested his
-generation more than any other. It had failed, and failed twice; but did
-that prove anything? Fortune had deserted him, and he had been unable to
-finish _The Gipsy_. Was it the fault of circumstances that he had not been
-able to finish that play? or was it that the slight vein of genius that had
-been in him once had been exhausted? He remembered the article in _The
-Modern Review_, and was frightened to think that the critic might have
-divined the truth. Once it had seemed impossible to finish that play; but
-fortune had come to his aid, accident had made him master of his destiny;
-he could spend three years, five years if he liked, on _The Gipsy_. But why
-think of the play at all? What did it matter even if he never wrote it?
-There were many things to do in life besides writing plays. There was life!
-His life was henceforth his own, and he could live it as he pleased. What
-should he do with it? To whom should he give it? Should he keep it all for
-himself and his art? It were useless to make plans. All he knew for certain
-was that henceforth he was master of his own life, and could dispense it as
-he pleased.
-
-And then, in sensuous curiosity, his thoughts turned on the pleasure of
-life in this beautiful house, in the society of two charming women.
-
-'Perhaps I shall marry one of them. Which do I like the better? I haven't
-the least idea.' And then, as his thoughts detached themselves, he
-remembered Emily's tears.
-
-
-
-
-X
-
-
-It was a day of English summer, and the meadows and trees drowsed in the
-moist atmosphere; a few white clouds hung lazily in the blue sky; the
-garden was bright with geraniums and early roses, and the closely cropped
-privets were in full leaf. Hubert's senses were taken with the beauty of
-the morning, and there came the thought, so delicious, 'All this is mine.'
-He noticed the glitter of the greenhouses, and thought the cawing of some
-young rooks a sweet sound; a great tortoiseshell cat lay basking in the
-middle of the greensward, whisking its furry tail. Hubert stroked the
-animal; it arched its back, and rubbed itself against his legs. At that
-moment a half-bred fox-terrier barked noisily at him; he heard some one
-calling the dog, and saw a slight black figure hastening down one of the
-side-walks. Despite the dog's attempts on his legs, he ran forward.
-
-'Emily! Emily!' he called. She stopped, turned, and stood looking at him.
-
-'My dear cousin,' he said. 'I'm sorry about last night. I hope that Mrs.
-Bentley has told you. I begged of her to do so.'
-
-'Yes; she told me of your kind intentions. I have to thank you.'
-
-They walked on in silence, neither knowing what to say.
-
-'Go away, Dandy!' said Emily, thrusting her black silk parasol at the dog,
-who had begun an attack on Hubert's trousers. The dog retreated; Hubert
-laughed.
-
-'I'm afraid he doesn't like me.'
-
-'He'll soon get to know you. Are you fond of animals?'
-
-'I don't know that I am, particularly.'
-
-'Oh!' she said, looking at him reproachfully, 'how can you?' Her eyes
-seemed to say, 'I never can like you after that.' 'I adore animals,' she
-said. 'My dear dog--there is nothing in the world I love as I love my
-Dandy; come here, dear.' The dog came, wagging his tail, putting back his
-ears, knowing he was going to be caressed. Emily stooped down, took his
-rough head in her hands, and kissed him. 'Is he not a dear?' she said,
-looking up; and then she said, 'I hope you won't object to having him in
-the house;' her face clouded.
-
-'Oh, my dear Emily, how can you ask such a question? I shall never object
-to anything you desire.' The conversation paused, and they walked some
-paces in silence. Emily had just begun to speak of her flowers, when they
-came upon the gardener, who was standing in consternation over the
-fragments of a broken mowing-machine. Jack--that was the donkey--had been
-left to himself just for a moment. It was impossible to say what wild freak
-had taken him; but instead of waiting, as he was expected to wait,
-stolidly, he had started off on a wild career, regardless of the safety of
-the machine. At the first bound it had come in contact with a flower-vase,
-which had been sent in many pieces over the sward; at the second it had met
-with some stone coping; and at the third it had turned over in complete
-dissolution, and Jack was free to tear up the turf with his hoofs, until
-finally his erratic course was stopped by the small boy who was responsible
-for the animal's behaviour. The arrival of Hubert and Emily saved the small
-boy from many a cuff and the donkey from a kick or two; and Jack stood amid
-the ruin he had created, as quiet and as docile a creature as the mind
-could imagine.
-
-'Oh, you--you wicked Jack! Who would have thought it of you?' said Emily,
-throwing her arms round the animal's neck. 'And at your age, too! This is
-my old donkey,' she said, turning her dreamy eyes on Hubert. 'I used to
-ride him every day until about two years ago. I love my dear old Jack, and
-would not have him beaten for worlds, although he is so wicked as to break
-the mowing-machine. Look what you have done to the flower-vase.' The animal
-shook its long ears.
-
-Hubert and Emily strolled down a long walk, wondering what they should talk
-about.
-
-'These are really very pretty grounds,' he said at last. 'I am sure I shall
-enjoy myself immensely here.' The remark appeared to him to be of doubtful
-taste, and he hastened to add, 'That is to say, if I have completely made
-it up with my pretty cousin.'
-
-'But you have not seen the place yet,' she said, speaking still with a
-certain tremor in her voice. 'You haven't even seen the gardens. Come, and
-I'll show them to you.'
-
-Hubert would have preferred to walk with her through these ornamental
-swards; and he liked the espalier apple-trees with which the garden was
-divided better than the glare and heat of the greenhouses into which she
-took him.
-
-'Do you care for flowers?'
-
-'Not very much.'
-
-'These are all my flowers,' she said, pointing to many rows of flower-pots.
-'Those are Julia's. You see I run a line of thread around mine, so that
-there shall be no mistake. She is not nearly so careful as I am, and it
-isn't nice to find that the plants you have been tending for weeks have
-been spoilt by over-watering. I don't say she doesn't love them, but she
-forgets them.... Just look at those; they are devoured by insects. They
-want to be taken out and given a thorough cleansing. Even then I doubt if
-they would come out right,--a plant never forgives you; it is just like a
-human being.'
-
-'And doesn't a human being ever forgive?'
-
-'Oh, I didn't mean that!' she said, blushing; 'but sometimes I could cry
-over the poor plants which she neglects. I daresay you will think me very
-ridiculous, but I do cry sometimes, and sometimes I cannot resist taking
-them out on the sly, and giving them a thoroughly good syringing,--only you
-must not tell her; we have agreed not to touch each other's flowers. But I
-cannot bear to see the poor things dying. How do we know that they do not
-suffer?'
-
-'I don't think it probable.'
-
-'But we don't know for certain,' she said, fixing her great eyes on him.
-'Do we?'
-
-'We know nothing for certain,' he answered; and then he said, 'You and Mrs.
-Bentley have lived a long time together?'
-
-'No; not very long. About a couple of years. I was about thirteen when I
-came to Ashwood. I am now eighteen. Mrs. Bentley is a sort of connection.
-She is very poor--that is why Mr. Burnett asked her to come and live here;
-besides, as I grew up I wanted a companion. She has been very good to me.
-We have been very happy together--at least, as happy as one may be; for I
-don't think that any one is ever very happy. Have you been very happy?'
-
-'I have not always been happy. But tell me more about Mrs. Bentley.'
-
-'There is little more to tell. I naturally love her very much. She nursed
-me when I was ill--and I'm often ill; she taught me all I know; she cheered
-me when I was sad--when I thought my heart would break; when everybody else
-seemed unkind she was kind. Besides, I could not remain here without her.'
-Emily lowered her eyes, and the conversation seemed to pause.
-
-'I have arranged all that,' Hubert answered hurriedly. 'I spoke to her last
-night, and she has consented to remain.'
-
-'That is very good of you.' Emily raised her eyes and looked shyly at
-Hubert; and then, as if doubtful of herself, she said, 'Do you like her?
-I'm sure you do. Every one does. Do you not think she is very handsome?'
-
-'I think her an exceedingly pleasant woman, and I'm sure we shall all get
-on very well together.'
-
-'But don't you think her very handsome?'
-
-'Yes; she is a handsome woman.'
-
-Nothing more was said. Emily drew meditatively on the gravel with the point
-of her parasol. The gardeners looked up from their work.
-
-'I have to go now,' she said, raising her eyes timidly, 'to feed the swans.
-You would not care to go so far?'
-
-'On the contrary, I should like it, of all things. A walk by the water on a
-day like this will be quite a treat.'
-
-'Then will you wait a moment? I will go and fetch the bread.' She returned
-soon after with a small basket; and a large retriever, tied up in the
-corner of the yard, barked and lugged at his chain. 'He knows where I am
-going, and is afraid I shall forget him--aren't you, dear old Don? You
-wouldn't like to miss a walk with your mistress, would you, dear?' The dog
-bounded and rushed from side to side; it was with difficulty that Emily
-loosed him. Once free, he galloped down the drive, returning at intervals
-for a caress and a sniff at the basket which his mistress carried. 'There's
-nothing there for you, my beautiful Don!'
-
-The drive sloped from the house down to the artificial water, passing under
-some large elms; and in the twilight of the branches where the sunlight
-played, and the silence was tremulous with wings, Hubert felt that Emily
-had forgiven him. She wore the same black dress that he had admired her in
-the night before; her waist was confined by the same black band; but the
-chestnut hair seemed more beautiful beneath the black silk sunshade, leaned
-so gracefully, the black handle held between thumb and forefinger. And the
-little black figure seemed a part of the beautiful English park, now so
-green and fragrant in all the flower and sunlight of June, and decorated
-with a blue summer sky, and white clouds moving lazily over the tops of the
-trees. And the impression of the beautiful park was enforced by its
-reflection, which lay, with the mute magic of reflected things, in the
-still water, stirred only when, with exquisite motion of webbed feet, the
-swans propelled their freshness to and fro, balancing themselves in the
-current where they knew the bread must surely fall.
-
-'They are waiting for me. Cannot you see their black eyes turned towards
-the bridge?' And she threw the bread from the basket, and the beautiful
-birds unbent their curved necks, devouring it voraciously under the water.
-
-In the larger portion of this artificial lake there were two islands,
-thickly wooded. In the smaller, which lay behind Emily and Hubert, there
-was one small island covered with reeds and low bushes, and this was a
-favourite haunt for the waterfowl, which now came swimming forward, not
-daring to approach too near the dangerous swans.
-
-'These are my friends,' said Emily. 'They will follow me to the other end,
-and I shall be able to feed them as we walk along the meadow.'
-
-Don and Dandy bounded through the tall grass; sometimes foolishly giving
-chase to the birds that rose up out of the golden grasses, barking in mad
-eagerness--sometimes pursuing a hare into the distant woods. The last chase
-had led them far, and both dogs returned panting to walk till they
-recovered breath by their mistress's side; and to satisfy the retriever's
-affection Emily held one hand to him. Playing gently with his ears, she
-said--
-
-'Did you ever see much of Mr. Burnett?'
-
-'Not since I was a boy, ten or twelve years ago, when I was at the
-University. There was absolutely no reason for his doing what he did.'
-
-'Yes; there was,' she said in a strangely decisive tone.
-
-'May I ask----'
-
-'I do not know if I ought to tell you. It would be better not to. You
-know,' she continued, speaking now with a nervous tremor in her voice,
-'that I do not want you to think that I am so very disappointed. I do not
-know that I am disappointed at all. You have acted so generously, and it
-will be pleasanter to live here with you than with that old man.'
-
-The conversation fell; but the sweet meadow seemed to induce confidences,
-and they were so happy in their youth and the sorcery of the sunshine.
-'Five years ago I wrote to him,' said Hubert, speaking very slowly, 'asking
-him to lend me fifty pounds, and he refused. Since then I have not heard
-from him.' At the end of a long silence, the girl said--
-
-'So long as you know that I am no longer angry with him for having
-disinherited me, I do not mind telling you the reason. Two months before he
-died he asked me to marry him, and I refused.'
-
-They walked several yards without speaking.
-
-'Do you not think I was right? I was only eighteen, and he was over sixty.'
-
-'It seems to me quite shocking that he could have even contemplated such a
-thing.'
-
-'But look at these poor ducks; they have followed us all the way, and I
-have forgotten to feed them!' Taking out all the bread that remained in the
-basket, Emily threw it to the ducks that had collected where the dammed-up
-stream that filled the lake trickled over a wooden sluice. There was a
-plank by which to cross the deep cutting. Hubert and Emily paused, and
-stood gazing at the large beech wood that swept over some rising ground.
-Don had not been seen for some time, and they both shouted to him.
-Presently a black mass was seen bounding through the flowers, and the
-panting animal once more ensconced himself by his mistress's side.
-
-'I was very fond of Mr. Burnett,' she said, 'but I could not marry him. I
-could not marry any man I did not love.'
-
-'And because you refused to marry him, he did not mention you in his will.
-I never heard of such selfishness before!'
-
-'Men are always selfish,' she said sententiously. 'But it really does not
-matter; things are just the same; he hasn't succeeded in altering
-anything--at least, not for the worse. We shall get on very well together.'
-
-The conversation paused. Then Emily went on: 'You won't tell any one I told
-you? I only told you because I did not want you to think me selfish. I was
-afraid that after the foolish way I behaved last night you might think I
-hated you. Indeed, I do not. Perhaps everything has happened for the best.
-I was very fond of the old man. I gave him my whole heart; no father ever
-had a daughter more attached; but I could not marry him. And it was the
-remembrance of my love for him that made me burst out crying. I do not
-think I realised until I saw you how cruelly I had been treated. But you
-won't tell any one? You won't tell Mrs. Bentley? She knows, of course; but
-do not tell her that I told you. I do not care that my feelings should be
-made a subject of discussion. You promise me?'
-
-'I promise you.'
-
-They had now reached the tennis-lawn. The gong sounded, and Emily said,
-'That is lunch, and we shall find Julia waiting for us in the dining-room.'
-It was as she said. Mrs. Bentley was standing by the sideboard, her basket
-of keys in her hand; she had not quite finished her housekeeping, and was
-giving some last instructions to the butler. Hubert noticed that the place
-at the head of the table was for him, and he sat down a little embarrassed,
-to carve a chicken. So much home after so many years of homelessness seemed
-strange.
-
-
-
-
-XI
-
-
-On the third day, as soon as breakfast was over, Hubert introduced the
-subject of his departure. Julia waited, but as Emily did not speak, she
-said, 'We thought you liked the country better than town.'
-
-'So I do, but----'
-
-'He's tired of us, and we had better leave,' Emily said, abruptly.
-
-Hubert started a little; he looked appealingly at Julia, and seeing the
-look of genuine pain upon his face, she took pity on him. 'You should not
-speak like that, Emily dear; I can see that you pain Mr. Price very much.'
-
-'I hope, Emily, that you will stay here as long as you like,' he said, in a
-low, gentle voice; 'as long as it is convenient and agreeable to you.'
-
-'We cannot stay here without you,' Emily replied; 'we are your guests.'
-
-'And,' said Julia, smiling, 'if there are guests, there must be a host. But
-if you have business in London, of course you must go.'
-
-'I was not thinking of myself,' said Hubert, 'but of you ladies. I was
-afraid that you were already tired of me; that you might like to be left
-alone; that you had business, preparations. I daresay I was all wrong; but
-if Emily knew----'
-
-'I'm sorry, Hubert; I did not mean to offend you. I'm very unlucky. You'll
-forgive me.'
-
-'I've nothing to forgive; I only hope that you'll never think again that I
-want to get rid of you. I hope that you'll stop at Ashwood as long as ever
-it suits you to do so. I don't see how I can say more.'
-
-'I like to stop here as long as you are here,' Emily said, in a low voice.
-'That is all I meant.'
-
-'Then we're all of one mind, I don't want to go back to London. If you
-don't find me in your way, I shall be delighted to stay.'
-
-'Of course,' said Julia, 'we poor country folk can hardly hope to amuse
-you.'
-
-'I don't know about that!' exclaimed Emily. 'Where would he find any one to
-play and sing to him in the evenings as you can?'
-
-The conversation paused, and all were happier that morning, though none
-knew why. Days passed, desultory and sweet, and with a pile of books about
-him, he lay in a long cane chair under the trees; then the book would drop
-on his knees, and blowing smoke in curling wreaths, he lost himself in
-dramatic meditations. It was pleasant to see that Emily had grown
-innocently, childishly fond of her cousin, and her fondness expressed
-itself in a number of pretty ways. 'Now, Hubert, Hubert, get out of my
-way,' she would say, feigning a charming petulance; or she would come and
-drag him out of his chair, saying, 'Come, Hubert, I can't allow you to lie
-there any longer; I have to go to South Water, and want you to come with
-me?'
-
-And walking together, they seemed like an Italian greyhound and a tall,
-shaggy setter.
-
-A cloud only appeared on Emily's face when Julia spoke of their departure.
-Julia had proposed that they should leave at the end of the month, and
-Emily had consented to this arrangement. The end of the month had appeared
-to her indefinitely distant, but three weeks of the subscribed time had
-passed, and signs of departure had become more numerous and more
-peremptory. Allusion had been made to the laundress, and Julia had asked
-Emily if she could get all her things into a single box; if not, they would
-have to send to Brighton for another. Emily had no notion of what her box
-would hold, and she showed little disposition to count her dresses or put
-her linen in order. She seemed entirely taken up thinking what books, what
-pictures, what china she could take away. She would like to have this
-bookcase, and might she not take the wardrobe from her own room? and she
-had known the clock all her life, and it did seem so hard to part with it.
-
-'My dear girl, all these things belong to Mr. Price; you really cannot take
-them away without asking him.'
-
-'But he won't refuse; he'll let me have anything I like.'
-
-'He can't very well refuse, so I think it would be nicer on your part not
-to ask for anything.'
-
-'I must have some of these things: I want to make the house we are going to
-live in, in London, look as much like Ashwood as possible.'
-
-'You'd like to take the whole house with you if you could.'
-
-'Yes; I think I should.' And Emily turned and looked vaguely up and down
-the passage. 'I wonder if he'd give me the picture of the windmill?'
-
-'The landing would look very bare without it.'
-
-'It would indeed, and when we came down here on a visit--for I suppose we
-shall come down here sometimes on visits--I should miss the picture
-dreadfully, so I don't think I'll ask him for it. But I must take some
-pictures away with me. There are a lot of old things in the lumber-room at
-the top of the house, that no one knows anything about. I think I'll ask
-him to let me have them. I'll take him for a good long ramble through the
-house. He hasn't seen any of it yet, except just the rooms we live in
-down-stairs.'
-
-Emily went straight to Hubert. He was lying in the long wicker chair, his
-straw hat drawn over his eyes, for the sun was finding its sharp, white way
-through the leaves of the beeches.
-
-'Now, Hubert, I want you. Are you asleep?'
-
-'Asleep! No, I was only thinking.' He threw his legs over the edge of the
-low chair and stood up.
-
-'If I tell you what I want, you won't refuse me, will you?'
-
-'No,' he said smilingly; 'I don't think I shall.'
-
-'Are you sure?' she said, looking at him enigmatically. Then in a lighter
-tone: 'I want you to give me a lot of things--oh, not a great many, nothing
-very valuable, but----'
-
-'But what, Emily?... You can have anything you want.'
-
-'Well, we shall see. You must come with me; I must show you what--I shan't
-want them unless you like to give them. Come along. Oh, you must come. I
-should not care about them unless you came with me, and let me point them
-out.' She passed her little hand into the arm of his rough coat, and led
-him towards the house. 'You know nothing of your own house, so before I go
-I intend to show you all over it. You have no idea what a funny old place
-it is up-stairs--endless old lumber-rooms which you would never think of
-going into if I didn't take you. When I was a little girl I wasn't often
-allowed down-stairs: the top of the house still seems to me more real than
-any other part.' Throwing open a door at the head of the stairs, she said:
-'This used to be my nursery. It is all bare and deserted now, but I
-remember it quite different. I used to spend hours looking out of that
-window. From it you can see all over the park, and the park used to be my
-great delight. I used to sit there and make resolutions that next time I
-went out I would be braver, and explore the hollows full of bushes and tall
-ferns.'
-
-'Did you never break your resolutions?'
-
-'Sometimes. I was afraid of meeting fairies or elves. There are glades and
-hollows that used to seem very wonderful. And they still seem very
-wonderful, only not quite in the same way. Doesn't the world seem very
-wonderful to you? I'm always wondering at things. But I know I'm only a
-silly little girl, and yet I like to talk to you about my fancies. Down
-there in the beech wood there is a beautiful glade. I loved to play there
-better than anywhere else. I used to lie there on a fur rug and play at
-paper dolls. I always fancied myself a duchess or a princess.'
-
-'You are full of dreams, Emily.'
-
-'Yes; I suppose I am. Everything is pleasant and happy in dreams. I love
-dreaming. They thought I'd never learn to read; but it wasn't because I was
-stupid, but because I wouldn't study. I'd put my hands to my head, and,
-looking at the book, which I didn't see, I'd think of all sorts of things,
-imagine myself a fairy princess.'
-
-'And it was in this room that you dreamed all those dreams?'
-
-'Yes; in this dear old room. You see that picture: that is one of the
-things I intended to ask you to give me.'
-
-'What? That old, dilapidated print?'
-
-'You mustn't abuse my picture. I used to spend hours wondering if those
-horsemen galloping so madly through the wood were robbers, and if they had
-robbed the castle shown between the trees. I used to wonder if they would
-succeed in escaping. They wouldn't gallop their horses like that unless
-they were being pursued.... Can I have the picture?'
-
-'Of course you can. Is that--that is not all you are going to ask me for?'
-
-'I did think of asking you for a few more things. Do you mind?'
-
-'No, not the least. The more you ask for, the more I shall be pleased.'
-
-'Then you must come down-stairs.'
-
-They went down to the next landing. Emily stopped before a bed-room, and,
-looking at Hubert shyly and interrogatively, she said--
-
-'This is my room. I don't know if it is in a fit state to show you. I'm not
-a very tidy girl. I'll look first.'
-
-'Yes; it will do,' she said, drawing back. 'You can look in. I want you to
-give me that wardrobe. It isn't a very handsome one, but I've used it ever
-since I was a little girl; it has a hollow top, and I used to hide things
-there. Do you think you can spare it?'
-
-'Yes; I think I can,' he said, smiling.
-
-Then she led him up-stairs through the old lumber rooms, picking out here
-and there some generally broken and always worthless piece of furniture,
-pleading for it timidly, and strangely delighted when he nodded, granting
-her every request. She asked him to pull out what she had chosen from the
-_débris_, and a curious collection they made in the passage--dim and
-worm-eaten pictures, small book-cases, broken vases which she proposed
-mending.
-
-Hubert wiped the dust from his hands and coat-sleeves.
-
-'What a lot of things you have given me! Now we shall be able to get on
-nicely with our furnishing.'
-
-'What furnishing?'
-
-'The furnishing of the little house in London where Julia and I are going
-to live. You said you intended to add a hundred a year to the three hundred
-a year which Mr. Burnett should have left me; I don't see why you should do
-such a thing, but if you do we shall have four hundred a year to live upon.
-Julia says that we shall then be able to afford to give fifty pounds a year
-for a house. We can get a very nice little house, she says, for that--of
-course, in one of the suburbs. The great expense will be the furnishing; we
-are going to do it on the hire system. I daresay one can get very nice
-things in that way, but I do want to make the place look a little like
-Ashwood; that is why I'm asking you for these things. I was always fond of
-playing in these old lumber-rooms, and these dim old pictures, which I
-don't think any one knows anything of except myself, will remind me of
-Ashwood. They will look very well, indeed, hanging round our little
-dining-room. You are sure you don't want them, do you?'
-
-'No; I won't want them. I'm only too pleased to be able to give them to
-you.'
-
-'You are very good, indeed you are. Look at these old haymakers; I never
-saw but one little corner of this picture before; it was stowed away behind
-a lot of lumber, and I hadn't the strength to pull it out.... I'm afraid
-you've got yourself rather dusty.'
-
-'Oh no; it will brush off.'
-
-'I shall hang this picture over the fireplace; it will look very well
-there. I daresay you don't see anything in it, but I'd sooner have these
-pictures than those down-stairs. I love the picture of the windmill on the
-first landing----'
-
-'Then why not have it? I'll have it taken down at once.'
-
-'No; I could not think of taking it. How would the landing look without it?
-I should miss it dreadfully when I came here--for I daresay you will ask us
-to visit you occasionally, when you are lonely, won't you?'
-
-'My dear Emily, whenever you like, I hope you will come here.'
-
-'And you will come and stay with us in London? Your room will be always
-ready; I'll look after that. We shall feel very offended, indeed, if you
-ever think of going to an hotel. Of course, you mustn't expect much; we
-shall only be able to keep one servant, but we shall try to make you
-comfortable, and, when you come, you'll take me to the theatres, to see one
-of your own plays.'
-
-'If my play's being played, certainly. But would it be right for me to pay
-you visits in London?'
-
-'They would be very wicked people indeed who saw anything wrong in it; you
-are my cousin. But why do you say such things? You destroy all my pleasure,
-and I was so happy just now.'
-
-'I'm afraid, Emily, your happiness hangs on a very slender thread.'
-
-She looked at him inquiringly, but feeling that it would be unwise to
-attempt an explanation, he said in a different tone--
-
-'But, Emily, if you love Ashwood so well, why do you go away?'
-
-'Why do I go away? We have been here now some time.... I can't live here
-always.'
-
-'Why not? Why not let things go on just as they are?'
-
-'And live here with you, I and Julia?'
-
-'Yes; why not?'
-
-'We should bore you; you want to write your plays, you'd get tired of me.'
-
-'Your being here would not prevent my writing my plays. I have been
-thinking all the while of asking you to remain, but was afraid you would
-not care to live here.'
-
-'Not care to live here! But you'll get tired of us; we might quarrel.'
-
-'No; we shall never quarrel. You will be doing me a great favour by
-remaining. Just fancy living alone in this great house, not a soul to speak
-to all day! I'm sure I should end by going out and hanging myself on one of
-those trees.'
-
-'You wouldn't do that, would you?'
-
-Hubert laughed. 'You and Mrs. Bentley will be doing me a great favour by
-remaining. If you go away I shall be robbed right and left, the gardens
-will go to rack and ruin, and when you come down here you won't know the
-place, and then, perhaps, we shall quarrel.'
-
-'I shouldn't like Ashwood to go to rack and ruin--and my poor flowers! And
-I'm sure you'd forget to feed the swans. If you did that, I could not
-forgive you.'
-
-'Well, let these grave considerations decide you to remain.'
-
-'Are you really serious?'
-
-'I never was more serious in my life.'
-
-'Well then, may I run and tell Julia?'
-
-'Certainly, and I'll--no, I won't. I'll look up the housemaids and tell
-them to restore this interesting collection of antiquities to their
-original dust.'
-
-
-
-
-XII
-
-
-He was, perhaps, a little too conscious of his happiness; and he feared to
-do anything that would endanger the pleasure of his present life. It seemed
-to him like a costly thing which might slip from his hand or be broken; and
-day by day he appreciated more and more the delicate comfort of this
-well-ordered house--its brightness, its ample rooms, the charm of space
-within and without, the health of regular and wholesome meals, the presence
-of these two women, whose first desire was to minister to his least wish or
-caprice. These, the first spoilings he had received, combined to render him
-singularly happy. Bohemianism, he often thought, had been forced upon
-him--it was not natural to him, and though spiritual belief was dead, he
-experienced in church a resurrection of influences which misfortune had
-hypnotised, but which were stirring again into life. He was conscious again
-of this revival of his early life in the evenings when Mrs. Bentley went to
-the piano; and when playing a game of chess or draughts, remembrances of
-the old Shropshire rectory came back, sudden, distinct, and sweet. In these
-days the disease of fame and artistic achievement only sang monotonously,
-plaintively, like the wind in the valleys where the wind never wholly
-rests.
-
-Sometimes, when moved by the novel he was reading, he would discuss its
-merits and demerits with the two women who sat by him in the quiet of the
-dim drawing-room, their work on their knees, thinking of him. In the
-excitement of criticism his thoughts wandered to his own work, and the
-women's eyes filled with reveries, and their hands folded languidly over
-their knees. He spoke without emphasis, his words seeming to drop from the
-thick obsession of his dream. At ten the ladies gathered up their work,
-bade him good-night; and nightly these good-nights grew tenderer, and
-nightly they went up-stairs more deeply penetrated with a sense of their
-happiness. But at heart he was a man's man. He hardly perceived life from a
-woman's point of view; and in the long evenings which he spent with these
-women he sometimes had to force himself to appear interested in their
-conversation. He was as far removed from one as from the other. Emily's
-wilfulness puzzled him, and he did not seem to have anything further to
-talk about to Mrs. Bentley.
-
-He missed the bachelor evenings of former days--the whisky and water, the
-pipes, and the literary discussion; and as the days went by he began to
-think of London; his thoughts turned affectionately towards the friends he
-had not seen for so long, and at the end of July he announced his intention
-of running up to town for a few days. So one morning breakfast was hurried
-through; Emily was sure there was plenty of time; Hubert looked at the
-clock and said he must be off; Julia ran after him with parcels which he
-had forgotten; farewell signs were waved; the dog-cart passed out of sight,
-and, after lingering a moment, the women returned to the drawing-room
-thoughtfully.
-
-'I wonder if he'll catch the train,' said Emily, without taking her face
-from the window.
-
-'I hope so; it will be very tiresome for him if he has to come back. There
-isn't another train before three o'clock.'
-
-'If he missed this train he wouldn't go until to-morrow morning.... I
-wonder how long he'll stay away. Supposing something happened, and he never
-came back!' Emily turned round and looked at Julia in dreamy wonderment.
-
-'Not come back at all? What nonsense you are talking, Emily! He won't be
-away more than a fortnight or three weeks.'
-
-'Three weeks! that seems a very long while. How shall we get through our
-evenings?'
-
-Emily had again turned towards the window. Julia did not trouble to reply.
-She smiled a little, as she paused on the threshold, for she remembered
-that no more than a few weeks ago Emily had addressed to her passionate
-speeches declaring her to be her only friend, and that they would like to
-live together, content in each other's companionship, always ignoring the
-rest of the world. Although she had not mistaken these speeches for
-anything more than the nervous passion of a moment, the suddenness of the
-recantation surprised her a little. Three or four days after, the girl was
-in a different mood, and when they came into the drawing-room after dinner
-she threw her arms about Julia's neck, saying, 'Isn't this like old times?
-Here we are, living all alone together, and I'm not boring myself a bit. I
-never shall have another friend like you, Julia.'
-
-'But you'll be very glad when Hubert comes back.'
-
-'There's no harm in that, is there? I should be very ungrateful if I
-wasn't. Think how good he has been to us.... I'm afraid you don't like him,
-Julia.'
-
-'Oh, yes, I do, Emily.'
-
-'Not so much as I do.' And raising herself--she was sitting on Julia's
-knees--Emily looked at Julia.
-
-'Perhaps not,' Julia replied, smiling; 'but then I never hated him as much
-as you did.'
-
-A cloud came over Emily's face. 'I did hate him, didn't I? You remember
-that first evening? You remember when you came up-stairs and found me
-trembling in the passage--I was afraid to go to bed. ... I begged you to
-allow me to sleep with you. You remember how we listened for his footstep
-in the passage, as he went up to bed, and how I clung to you? Then the
-dreams of that night. I never told you what my dreams were, but you
-remember how I woke up with a cry, and you asked me what was the matter?'
-
-'Yes, I remember.'
-
-'I dreamt I was with him in a garden, and was trying to get away; but he
-held me by a single hair, and the hair would not break. How absurd dreams
-are! And the garden was full of flowers, but every time I tried to gather
-them, he pulled me back by that single hair. I don't remember any more,
-only something about running wildly away from him, and losing myself in a
-dark forest, and there the ground was soft like a bog, and it seemed as if
-I were going to be swallowed up every moment. It was a terrible sensation.
-All of a sudden I woke with a cry. The room was grey with dawn, and you
-said: "Emily dear, what have you been dreaming, to cry out like that?" I
-was too tired and frightened to tell you much about my dream, and next
-morning I had forgotten it. I did not remember it for a long time after,
-but all the same some of it came true. Don't you remember how I met Hubert
-next morning on the lawn? We went into the garden and spent the best part
-of the morning walking about the lake.... I don't know if I told you--I ran
-away when I heard him coming, and should have got away had it not been for
-this tiresome dog. He called after me, using my Christian name. I was so
-angry I think I hated him then more than ever. We walked a little way, and
-the next thing I remember was thinking how nice he was. I don't know how it
-all happened. Now I think of it, it seems like magic. It was the day that
-my old donkey ran away with the mowing machine and broke the flower-vase,
-the dear old thing; we had a long talk about "Jack." And then I took Hubert
-into the garden and showed him the flowers. I don't think he cares much
-about flowers; he pretended, but I could see it was only to please me. Then
-I knew that he liked me, for when I told him I was going to feed the swans,
-he said he loved swans and begged to be allowed to come too. I don't think
-a man would say that if he didn't like you, do you?'
-
-Emily's mind seemed to contain nothing but memories of Hubert. What he had
-said on this occasion, how he had looked at her on another. The
-conversation paused and Emily sunned herself in the enchantment of
-recollection, until at last breaking forth again, she said--
-
-'Have you noticed how Ethel Eastwick goes after him? And the odd part of it
-is, that she can't see that he dislikes her. He thinks nothing of her
-singing; he remained talking to me in the conservatory the whole time. I
-asked him to come into the drawing-room, but he pretended to misunderstand
-me, and asked me if I felt a draught. He said, "Let me get you a shawl." I
-said, "I assure you, Hubert, I don't feel any draught." But he would not
-believe me, and said he could not allow me to sit there without something
-on my shoulders. I begged of him not to move, for I knew that Ethel would
-never forgive me if I interrupted her singing; but he said he could get me
-a wrap without interrupting any one. He opened the conservatory door, ran
-across the lawn round to the front door, and came back with--what do you
-think? With two wraps instead of one; one was mine, and the other belonged
-to--I don't know who it belonged to. So I said, "Oh, what ever shall we do?
-I cannot let you go back again. If any one was to come in and find me
-alone, what ever would they think!" Hubert said, "Will you come with me? A
-walk in the garden will be pleasanter than sitting in the conservatory." I
-didn't like going at first, but I thought there couldn't be much harm.'
-
-It seemed to Emily very terrible and very wonderful, and she experienced
-throughout her numbed sense a strange, thrilling pain, akin to joy, and she
-sat, her little fragile form lost in the arm-chair, her great eyes fixed in
-ecstasy, seeing still the dark garden with the great star risen like a
-phantom above the trees. That evening had been to her a wonder and an
-enchantment, and her pausing thoughts dwelt on the moment when the distant
-sound of a bell reached their ears, and the bell came nearer, clanging
-fiercely in the sonorous garden. Then they saw a light--some one had come
-for them with a lantern--a joke, a suitable pleasantry, and amid joyous
-laughter, watching the setting moon, they had gone back to the tiled house,
-where dancers still passed the white-curtained windows. Hubert had sat by
-her at supper, serving her with meat and drink. In the sway of memory she
-trembled and started, looking in the great arm-chair like a little bird
-that the moon keeps awake in its soft nest. She no longer wished to tell
-Julia of that night in the garden; her sensation of it lay far beyond
-words; it was her secret, and it shone through her dreamy youth even as the
-star had shone through the heavens that night. Suddenly she said--
-
-'I wonder what Hubert is doing in London? I wonder where he is now?'
-
-'Now? It is just nine. I suppose he's in some theatre.'
-
-'I suppose he goes a great deal to the theatre. I wonder who he goes with.
-He has lots of friends in London--actresses, I suppose; he knows them who
-play in his plays. He dines at his club----'
-
-'Or at a restaurant.'
-
-'I wonder what a restaurant is like; ladies dine at restaurants, don't
-they?'
-
-As Julia was about to make reply, the servant brought her a letter. She
-opened the envelope, and took out a long, closely-written letter; she
-turned it over to see the signature, and then looking toward Emily, she
-said, with a pleasant smile--
-
-'Now I shall be able to answer your questions better; this letter is from
-Mr. Price.'
-
-'Oh, what does he say? Read it.'
-
-'Wait a moment, let me glance through it first; it is very difficult to
-read.' A few moments after, Julia said, 'There's not much that would
-interest you in the letter, Emily; it is all about his play. He says he
-would have written before if he had not been so busy looking out for a
-theatre, and engaging actors and actresses. He hopes to start rehearsing
-next week.
-
-"I say I hope, because there are still some parts of the play which do not
-satisfy me, particularly the third act. I intend to work steadily on the
-play till, next Thursday, five or six hours every day; I am in perfect
-health and spirits, and ought to be able to get the thing right. Should I
-fail to satisfy myself, or should any further faults appear when we begin
-to rehearse the piece, I shall dismiss my people, pack up my traps, and
-return to Ashwood. There I shall have quiet; here, people are continually
-knocking at my door, and I cannot deny my friends the pleasure of seeing
-me, if that is a pleasure. But at Ashwood, as I say, I shall be sure of
-quiet, and can easily finish the play this autumn, and February is a better
-time than September to produce a play."'
-
-'Then he goes on,' said Julia, 'to explain the alterations he contemplates
-making. There's no use reading you all that.'
-
-'I suppose you think I should not understand.'
-
-'My dear Emily, if you want to read the letter, there it is.'
-
-'I don't want to see your letter.'
-
-'What do you mean, Emily?'
-
-'Nothing, only I think it rather strange that he didn't write to me.'
-
-Some days after, Emily took up the book that Julia had laid down.
-'"Shakespeare's Plays." I suppose you are reading them so that you'll be
-able to talk to him better.'
-
-'I never thought of such a thing, Emily.' At the end of a long silence
-Emily said--
-
-'Do you think clever men like clever women?'
-
-'I don't know. Some say they do, some say they don't. I believe that really
-clever men, men of genius, don't.'
-
-'I wonder if Hubert is a man of genius. What do you think?'
-
-'I really am not capable of expressing an opinion on the matter.'
-
-Another week passed away, and Emily began to assume an air of languor and
-timid yearning. One day she said--
-
-'I wonder he doesn't write. He hasn't answered my letter yet. Has he
-answered yours?'
-
-'He has not written to me again. He hasn't time for letter-writing. He is
-working night and day at his play.'
-
-'I suppose he'd never think of coming down by the morning train. He'd be
-sure to come by the five o'clock.'
-
-'He won't come without writing. He'd be sure to write for the dog-cart.'
-
-'I suppose so. There's no use in looking out for him.'
-
-But, notwithstanding her certitude on the point, Emily could not help
-choosing five o'clock as the time for a walk, and Julia noticed that the
-girl's feet seemed to turn instinctively towards the lodge. Often she would
-leave the flowers she was tending on the terrace, and stand looking through
-the dim, sun-smitten landscape toward the red-brown spot, which was
-Southwater, in the middle of the long plain.
-
-
-
-
-XIII
-
-
-Hubert felt called upon to entertain his friends, and one evening they all
-sat dining at Hurlingham in the long room. The conversation, as usual, had
-been about books and pictures.
-
-It was the moment when strings of lanterns were hoisted from tree to tree.
-In front of a large space of sky the coloured globes were crude and
-trivial; but in the shadows of the trees by the river, where the mist rose
-into the branches, they had begun to awaken the first impression of
-melancholy and the sadness of _fête_. It was the moment when the great
-trees hung heavy and motionless, strangely green and solemn beneath a
-slate-coloured sky; and the plaintive waltz cried on Hungarian
-fiddle-strings, till it seemed the soul of this feminine evening. The
-fashionable crowd had moved out upon the lawn; the white dresses were
-phantom blue, and the men's coats faded into obscure masses, darkening the
-gathering shadows. It was the moment when voices soften, and every heart,
-overpowered with yearning, is impelled to tell of grief and disillusion;
-and every moment the wail of the fiddles grew more unbearable, tearing the
-heart to its very depths.
-
-Author and actor-manager walked up the lawn puffing at their cigars. The
-others sat watching, knowing that the opportunity had come for criticism of
-their friend.
-
-'He does not change much,' said Harding. 'Circumstances haven't affected
-him. A year ago he lived in a garret re-writing his play _Divorce_. He now
-rewrites _Divorce_ in a handsome house in Sussex.'
-
-'I thought he had finished his play,' said Thompson. 'I heard that he was
-going to take a theatre and produce it himself.'
-
-'But did you not hear him say at dinner that he was re-writing as he
-rehearsed? I met one of the actors yesterday. He doesn't know what to make
-of it. He gets a new part every week to learn.'
-
-'Do you think he'll ever produce it?'
-
-'I doubt it. At the last moment he'll find that the third act doesn't
-satisfy him, and will postpone the production till the spring.'
-
-'What do you think of his work?'
-
-'Very intelligent, but a little insipid--like himself. Look at him. _Il est
-bien l'homme de ses ouvres_. There is something dry about him, and his
-writings are like himself--hard, dry and wanting in personal passion.'
-
-'Yet he talks charmingly, with vivacity and intelligence, and he is so full
-of appreciation of Shakespeare, Goethe, and such genuine love for
-antiquity.'
-
-'I've heard him talk Shakespeare, Goethe, and Ibsen,' said Harding, 'but I
-never heard him say anything new, anything personal. It seems to me that
-you mistake quotation for perception. He assimilates, but he originates
-nothing. He has read a great deal; he is covered with literature like a
-rock with moss and lichen. He's appreciative, I will say that for him. He
-would make a capital editor, or a tutor, or a don, an Oxford don. He would
-be perfectly happy as a don; he could read up the German critics and
-expound Sophocles. He would be perfectly happy as a don. As it is, he is
-perfectly miserable.'
-
-'There was a fellow who had a studio over mine,' said Thompson. 'He had
-been in the army and used to paint a bit. The academy by chance hung a
-portrait, so he left the army and turned portrait-painter. One day he saw a
-picture by Velasquez, and he understood how horrid were the red things he
-used to send to the academy. He used to come down to see me; he used to
-say, "I wish I had never seen a picture, by Gad, it is driving me out of my
-mind." Poor chap, I wanted him to go back to the army. I said, Why paint?
-no one forces you to; it makes you miserable; don't do so any more. When
-you have anything to say, art is a joy; when you haven't, it is a curse to
-yourself and to others.'
-
-Philipps, the editor of _The Cosmopolitan_, turned towards Harding, and he
-said--
-
-'I cannot follow you in your estimate of Hubert Price. I don't see him
-either mentally or physically as you do. It seems to me that you distort
-the facts to make them fit in with your theory. He is tall and thin, but I
-do not think that his nature is hard and dry. I should, on the contrary,
-say that he was of a soft rather than a hard nature. The expression of his
-face is mild and melancholy. I do not detect the dry, hard, rocky basis of
-which you speak. I should say that Price was a sentimental man.'
-
-'I have never heard of him being in love,' said Harding. 'I should say that
-he had been entirely uninfluenced by women.'
-
-'But love of women is only one form of sentimentality and not the highest,
-nor the deepest,' said Philipps. 'I can imagine a man being exceedingly
-sentimental and not caring about women at all.'
-
-'What you say is true,' said Harding. His face showed that he felt the
-observation to be true and was interested in it. 'But I think I described
-him truly when I said he was like a rock overgrown with moss and lichen.
-There is not sufficient root-hold for any idea to grow in him, it withers
-and dies. Examine his literature, and you'll see it is as I say. He has
-written some remarkable plays, I don't say he hasn't. But they seem to be
-better than they are. He gets a picturesque situation, but there is always
-something mechanical about it. There's a human emotion somewhere, but it's
-never really there; it might have been, but it is not.... It is very well
-done, it is very intelligent; but it does not seem to live, to
-palpitate.... In like manner there are men who have read everything, who
-understand everything, who can theorise; they can tell you all about the
-masterpiece, but when it comes to producing one, well, they're not on in
-that scene.'
-
-'What an excellent character he would make in a novel! A drama of
-sterility,' said Phillips.
-
-'Or the dramas which they bring about,' said Harding.
-
-'Yes, or the dramas they bring about. But what drama can Price bring
-about--he shuts himself up in a room and tries to write a play,' said
-Phillips. 'I don't see how he can dramatise any life but his own.'
-
-'All deviations from the normal tend to bring about drama,' said Harding.
-
-'Then, why don't you do a Hubert Price in a book? It would be most
-interesting. Do you think you ever will?'
-
-'I don't think so.'
-
-'Why not? Because he is a friend of yours, and you would not like----'
-
-'I never allow my private life to interfere with my literature. No; for
-quite other reasons. I admit that he represents physically and mentally a
-great deal of the intellectual impotence current in our time. But it would
-be difficult, I think, to bring vividly before the reader that tall, thin,
-blonde man, with his pale gentle eyes and his insipid mind. I should take
-quite a different kind of man as my model.'
-
-'What kind of man?' said Phillips, and the five or six writers and painters
-leaned forward to listen to Harding.
-
-'I think I should imagine a man about the medium height. A nice figure,
-light, trim, neat. Good-looking, straight nose, eyes bright and
-intelligent. I think he would have beard, a very close-cut beard. The turn
-of his mind would be metaphysical and poetic--an intense subtility of mind
-combined with much order. He would be full of little habits. He would have
-note-books of a special kind in which to enter his ideas. The tendency of
-his mind would be towards concision, and he would by degrees extend his
-desire for concision into the twilight and the night of symbolism.'
-
-'A sort of constipated Browning,' said Phillips.
-
-'Exactly,' said Harding.
-
-'And would you have him married?' asked John Norton.
-
-'Certainly. I imagine him living in a tiny little house somewhere near the
-river--Westminster or Chelsea. His wife would be a dreadful person, thin,
-withered, herring-gutted--a sort of red herring with a cap. But his
-daughter would be charming, she would have inherited her father's features.
-I can imagine these women living in admiration of this man, tending on him,
-speaking very little, removed from worldly influences, seeing only the
-young men who come every Tuesday evening to listen to the poet's
-conversation--I don't hear them saying much--I can see them sitting in a
-corner listening for the ten thousandth time to aestheticisms not one word
-of which they understand, and about ten o'clock stealing away to some
-mysterious chamber. Something of the poet's sterility would have descended
-upon them.'
-
-'That is how you imagine _un génie raté_,' said Phillips. 'Your
-conception is clear enough; why don't you write the book?'
-
-'Because there is nothing more to say on the subject. It is a subject for a
-sketch, not for a book. But of this I'm sure, that the dry-rock man would
-come out more clearly in a book than the soft, insipid, gentle,
-companionable, red-bearded fellow.'
-
-'If Price were the dry, sterile nature you describe, we should feel no
-interest in him, we should not be discussing him as we are,' said Phillips.
-
-'Yes, we should--Price suffers; we're interested in him because he
-suffers--because he suffers in public--"I never was happy except on those
-rare occasions when I thought I was a great man." In that sentence you'll
-find the clew to his attractiveness. But in him there is nothing of the
-irresponsible passion which is genius. There's that little Rose
-Massey--that little baby who spends half her day dreaming, and who is as
-ignorant as a cod-fish. Well, she has got that something--that undefinable
-but always recognisable something. It was Price who discovered her. We used
-to laugh at him when he said she had genius. He was right; we were wrong.
-The other night I was standing in the wings; she was coming down from her
-dressing-room--she lingered on the stairs, looking the most insignificant
-little thing you can well imagine; but the moment her cue came a strange
-light came into her eyes and a strange life was fused in her limbs; she was
-transformed, and went on the stage a very symbol of passion and romance.'
-
-The slate colour of the sky did not seem to change, and yet the night grew
-visibly denser in the park; and there had come the sensation of things
-ended, a movement of wraps thrown over shoulders and thought of bedtime and
-home. The crowd was moving away, and nearly lost in the darkness Hubert
-came towards his friends. He had just knocked the ash from his cigar, and
-as he drew in the smoke the glow of the lighted end fled over his blonde
-face.
-
-
-
-
-XIV
-
-
-One day a short letter came from Hubert, asking Mrs. Bentley to send the
-dog-cart to the station to fetch him. He had decided to come home at once,
-and postpone the production of his play till the coming spring.
-
-Every rehearsal had revealed new and serious faults of construction. These
-he had attempted to remove when he went home in the evening, but though he
-often worked till daybreak, he did not achieve much. The very knowledge
-that he must come to rehearsal with the re-written scene seemed to produce
-in him a sort of mental paralysis, and, striking the table with his fist,
-he would get up, and a thought would cross his mind of how he might escape
-from this torture. After one terrible night, in which he feared his brain
-was really giving way, he went down to the theatre and dismissed the
-company, for he had resolved to return to Ashwood and spend another autumn
-and another winter re-writing _The Gipsy_. If it did not come right then,
-he would bother no more about it. Why should he? There was so much else in
-life besides literature. He had plenty of money, and was determined in any
-case to enjoy himself. So did his thoughts run as he leaned back on the
-cushions of a first-class carriage, glancing casually through the evening
-paper. Presently his eye was caught by a paragraph narrating an odd
-calamity which had overtaken a scene carpenter, an honest, respectable,
-sober, hard-working man, who had fulfilled all social obligations as
-perfectly as the most exacting could desire, until the day he had conceived
-the idea of a machine for the better exhibition of advertisements on the
-hoardings. His system was based on the roller-towel. The roller was moved
-by clockwork, and the advertisements went round like the towel. At first he
-spent his spare time and his spare money upon it, but as the hobby took
-possession of him, he devoted all his time and all his money to it; then he
-pawned his clothes, and then he raised money on the furniture; the brokers
-came in, and finally the poor fellow was taken to a lunatic asylum, and his
-wife and family were thrown on the parish. The story impressed Hubert
-strangely. He saw an analogy between himself and the crazy inventor, and he
-asked himself if he would go on re-writing _The Gipsy_ until he went out of
-his mind. 'Even if I do,' he thought, 'I can hurt no one but myself. No one
-else is dependent on me; my hobby can hurt no one but myself.' These
-forebodings passed away, and his mind filled up with schemes of work. He
-knew exactly what he wanted to do, and he looked forward to doing it. He
-wanted quiet, he wanted long days alone with himself. Such were his
-thoughts in the dog-cart as he drove home, and it was therefore vaguely
-unpleasant to him to meet the two ladies waiting for him at the lodge gate.
-Their smiles of welcome irritated him; he longed for the solitude of his
-study, the companionship of his work; and instead he had to sit with them
-in the drawing-room, and tell them how he liked London, what he had done
-there, whom he had seen there, and why he had been unable to finish his
-play to his satisfaction.
-
-In the morning Emily or Mrs. Bentley was generally about to pour out his
-coffee for him and keep him company. One day Hubert noticed that it was no
-longer Mrs. Bentley but Emily who met him in the passage, and followed him
-into the dining-room. And while he was eating she sat with her feet on the
-fender, talking of some girls in the neighbourhood--their jealousies, and
-how Edith Eastwick could not think of anything for herself, but always
-copied her dresses. Dandy drowsed at her feet, and very often she would
-take him to the window and make him go through all his tricks, calling on
-Hubert to admire him.
-
-She had a knack of monopolising Hubert, and since his return from London,
-her desire to do so had become almost a determination. Hubert showed no
-disinclination, and after breakfast they were to be seen together in the
-gardens. Hubert was a great catch, and there were other young ladies eager
-to be agreeable to him; but he did not seem to desire flirtation with any.
-So they came to speak of him as a very clever man, no doubt; but as they
-knew nothing about plays, he very probably did not care to talk to them.
-Hubert was not attractive in general society, and he would soon have failed
-to interest them at all had it not been for Emily. She was proud of her
-influence over him, and for the first time showed a desire to go into
-society. Day by day her conversation turned more and more on
-tennis-parties, and she even spoke about a ball. He consented to take her;
-and he had to dance with her, and she refused nearly every one, saying she
-was tired, leading Hubert away for long conversations in the galleries and
-on the staircases. Hubert had positively nothing to say to her; but she
-seemed quite happy as long as she was with him. And as they drove through
-the dawn Emily chattered of a hundred trifles,--what Edith had said, what
-Mabel wore, of the possibility of a marriage, and the arrival of a
-detachment of some cavalry regiment. Hubert found it hard to affect
-interest in these conversations. His brain was weary with waltz tunes, the
-shape of shoulders, and the glare and rustle of silk; but as she chattered,
-rubbing the misted windows from time to time, so as to determine how far
-they were from home, he wondered if he should ever marry, and half
-playfully he thought of her as his wife.
-
-But without warning his dreams were broken by a sudden thought, and he
-said--
-
-'Another time, I think it will be better, my dear Emily, that Mrs. Bentley
-should take you out.'
-
-'Why should you not take me out?... I suppose you don't care to--I bore
-you.'
-
-'No; on the contrary, I enjoy it--I like to see you amused; but I think you
-should have a proper chaperon.'
-
-Emily did not answer; and a little cloud came over her face. Hubert thought
-she looked even prettier in her displeasure than she had done in her joy;
-and he went to sleep thinking of her. Never had he thought her so
-beautiful--never had she touched him with so personal an interest; and next
-morning, when he lounged in his study, he was glad to hear her knock at the
-door; and the half-hour he spent with her there, yielding to her pleading
-to come for a walk with her, or drive her over to Southwater in the
-dog-cart, was one of unalloyed pleasure. But a few days after, as he lay in
-bed, a new idea came to him for his third act. So he said he would have
-breakfast in his study. He dressed, thinking the whole time how he could
-round off his idea and bring it into the act. So clear and precise did it
-seem in his mind that he sat down immediately after breakfast, forgetting
-even his matutinal cigar, and wrote with a flowing pen. He had left orders
-that he was not to be disturbed; and was annoyed when the door opened and
-Emily entered.
-
-'I am very sorry, but you must not be cross with me; I do so want you to
-come and see the Eastwicks with me.'
-
-'My dear Emily, I could not think of such a thing this morning. I am very
-busy--indeed I am.'
-
-'What are you doing? Nothing very important, I can see. You are only
-writing your play. You might come with me.'
-
-'My play is as important to me as a visit to the Eastwicks is to you,' he
-answered, smiling.
-
-'I have promised Edith.... I really do wish you would come.'
-
-'My dear Emily, it is quite impossible: do let me get on with my work!'
-
-Emily's face instantly changed expression; she turned to leave the room,
-and Hubert had to go after her and beg her to forgive him--he really had
-not meant to be rude to her.
-
-'You don't care to talk to me. I am not clever enough for you.'
-
-Then pity took him, and he made amends by suggesting they should go for a
-walk in the park, and she often succeeded in leading him even to dry,
-uninteresting neighbours. But the burden grew heavier, and soon he could
-endure no longer the evenings of devotion to her in the drawing-room, where
-the presence of Mrs. Bentley seemed to fill her with incipient rebellion.
-One evening after dinner, as he was about to escape up-stairs, Emily took
-his arm, pleading that he should play at least one game of backgammon with
-her. He played three; and then, thinking he had done enough, he took up a
-novel and began to read. Emily was bitterly offended. She sat in a corner,
-a picture of deep misery; and whenever he spoke to Mrs. Bentley, he thought
-she would burst into tears. It was exasperating to be the perpetual victim
-of such folly; and, pressed by the desire to talk to Mrs. Bentley about the
-book he was reading, he suggested that she should come with him to the
-meet. The Harriers met for the first time that season at not five miles
-from Ashwood. Mrs. Bentley pleaded an engagement. She had promised to go
-over to tea at the rectory.
-
-'Oh, we shall be back in plenty of time; I'll leave you at the rectory on
-our way home.'
-
-'Thank you, Mr. Price; but I do not think I can go.'
-
-'And why, may I ask?'
-
-'Well, perhaps Emily would like to go.'
-
-'Emily has a cold, and it would be folly of her to venture a long drive on
-a cold morning.'
-
-'My cold is quite well.'
-
-'You were complaining before dinner how bad it was.'
-
-'If you don't want to take me, say so.' Tears were now streaming down her
-cheeks.
-
-'My dear Emily, I am only too pleased to have you with me; I was only
-thinking of your cold.'
-
-'My cold is quite gone,' she said, with brightening face; and next morning
-she came down with her waterproof on her arm, and she had on a new cloth
-dress which she had just received from London. Hubert recognised in each
-article of attire a sign that she was determined to carry her point. It
-seemed cruel to tell her to take her things off, and he glanced at Mrs.
-Bentley and wondered if she were offended.
-
-'I hope the drive won't tire you; you know the meet is at least five miles
-from here.'
-
-Emily did not answer. She looked charming with her great boa tied about her
-throat, and sprang into the dog-cart all lightness and joy.
-
-'I hope you are well wrapped up about the knees,' said Mrs. Bentley.
-
-'Oh yes, thank you; Hubert is looking after me.'
-
-Mrs. Bentley's calm, statuesque face, whereon no trace of envy appeared,
-caught Hubert's attention as he gathered up the reins, and he thought how
-her altruism contrasted with the passionate egotism of the young girl.
-
-'I hope Julia was not disappointed. I know she wanted to come; but----'
-
-'But what?'
-
-'Well, no one likes Julia more than I do, and I don't want to say anything
-against her; but, having lived so long with her, I see her faults better
-than you can. She is horribly selfish! It never occurs to her to think of
-me.'
-
-Hubert did not answer, and Emily looked at him inquiringly. At last she
-said, 'I suppose you don't think so?'
-
-'Well, Emily, since you ask me, I must say that I think she took it very
-good-humouredly. You said you were ill, and it was all arranged that I
-should drive her to the meet; then you suddenly interposed, and said you
-wanted to go; and the moment you mentioned your desire to go, she gave way
-without a word. I really don't know what more you want.'
-
-'You don't know Julia. You cannot read her face. She never forgets
-anything, and is storing it up, and will pay me out for it sooner or
-later.'
-
-'My dear Emily, how can you say such things? I never heard---- She is
-always ready to sacrifice herself for you.'
-
-'You think so. She has a knack of pretending to be more unselfish than
-another; but she is in reality intensely selfish.'
-
-'All I can say is that it does not strike me so. I never saw any one give
-way more good-humouredly than she did to-day.'
-
-'I don't think that that is so wonderful, after all. She is only a paid
-companion; and I do not see why she should go driving about the country
-with you, and I be left at home.'
-
-Hubert was somewhat shocked. The conversation paused.
-
-'She gets on very well with men,' Emily said at last, breaking an
-irritating silence somewhat suddenly. 'They say she is very good-looking.
-Don't you think so?'
-
-'Oh yes, she is certainly a pretty woman--or, I should say, a good-looking
-woman. She is too tall to be what one generally understands as a pretty
-woman.'
-
-'Do you like tall women?'
-
-At that moment the hunt appeared in the field at the bottom of the hill. A
-grey horse had just got rid of his rider, and after galloping round and
-round, his head in the air, stopped and began to graze. The others jumped
-the hedge, and the greater part of the field got over the brook in capital
-style. Emily and Hubert watched them with delighted eyes, for the sight was
-indeed picturesque this fine autumn day. Even their horse pricked up his
-ears and began neighing, and Hubert had to hold him tight in hand, lest he
-should break away while they were enjoying the spectacle. At that moment a
-poor little animal, with fear-haunted eyes, and in all the agony of
-fatigue, appeared above the crest of the hill, and immediately after came
-the straining hounds, one within a dozen yards of the poor little beast,
-now running in a circle, uttering the most plaintive and pitiful cries.
-
-'Oh, they are not going to kill it!' cried Emily. 'Oh, save it, save it,
-Hubert!' She hid her face in her hands. 'Did it escape? is it killed?' she
-said, looking round. 'Oh, it is too cruel!' The huntsman was calling to the
-hounds, holding something above them, and at every moment horses' heads
-appeared over the brow of the hill.
-
-There was more hunting; and when the October night began to gather, and the
-lurid sunset flared up in the west, Hubert got out another wrap, and placed
-it about Emily's shoulders. But although the chill night had drawn them
-close together in the dog-cart, they were as widely separated as if oceans
-were between them. So far as lay in his power he had hidden the annoyance
-that the intrusion of her society had occasioned him; and, to deceive her,
-very little concealment was necessary. So long as she saw him she seemed to
-live in a dream, unconscious of every other thought.
-
-They rolled through a gradual effacement of things, seeing the lights of
-the farmhouses in the long plain start into existence, and then remain
-fixed, like gold beetles pinned on a blue curtain. The chill evening drew
-her to him, till they seemed one; and full of the intimate happiness of the
-senses which comes of a long day spent in the open air, she chattered of
-indifferent things. He thought how pleasant the drive would be were he with
-Mrs. Bentley--or, for the matter of that, with any one with whom he could
-talk about the novel that had interested him. They rolled along the smooth
-wide road, watching the streak of light growing narrower in a veil of light
-grey cloud drawn athwart the sky. Overpowered by her love, the girl hardly
-noticed his silence; and when they passed through the night of an
-overhanging wood her flesh thrilled, and a little faintness came over her;
-for the leaves that brushed her face had seemed like a kiss from her lover.
-
-
-
-
-XV
-
-
-One afternoon, about the end of September, Hubert came down from his study
-about tea-time, and announced that he had written the last scene of his
-last act. Emily was alone in the drawing-room.
-
-'Oh, how glad I am! Then it is done at last. Why not write at once and
-engage the theatre? When shall we go to London?'
-
-'Well, I don't mean that the play could be put into rehearsal to-morrow. It
-still requires a good deal of overhauling. Besides, even if it were
-completely finished, I should not care to produce it at once. I should like
-to lay it aside for a couple of months, and see how it read then.'
-
-'What a lot of trouble you do take! Does every one who writes plays take so
-much trouble?'
-
-'No, I'm afraid they do not, nor is it necessary they should. Their plays
-are merely incidents strung together more or less loosely; whereas my play
-is the development of a temperament, of temperamental characteristics which
-cannot be altered, having been inherited through centuries; it must
-therefore pursue its course to a fatal conclusion. In Shakespeare---- But
-no, no! these things have no interest for you. You shall have the nicest
-dress that money can buy; and if the play succeeds----'
-
-The girl raised her pathetic eyes. In truth, she cared not at all what he
-talked to her about; she was occupied with her own thoughts of him, and
-just to sit in the room with him, and to look at him occasionally, was
-sufficient. But for once his words had pained her. It was because she could
-not understand that he did not care to talk to her. Why did she not
-understand? It was hard for a little girl like her to understand such
-things as he spoke about; but she would understand; and then her thoughts
-passed into words, and she said--
-
-'I understand quite as well as Julia. She, knows the names of more books
-than I, and she is very clever at pretending that she knows more than she
-does.'
-
-At that moment Mrs. Bentley entered. She saw that Emily was enjoying her
-talk with her cousin, and tried to withdraw. But Hubert told her that he
-had written the last act; she pretended to be looking for a book, and then
-for some work which she said had dropped out of her basket.
-
-'If Emily would only continue the talking,' she thought, 'I should be able
-to get away.' But Emily said not a word. She sat as if frozen in her chair;
-and at length Mrs. Bentley was obliged to enter, however cursorily, into
-the conversation.
-
-'If you have written out _The Gipsy_ from end to end, I should advise you
-to produce it without further delay. Once it is put on the stage, you will
-be able to see better where it is wrong.'
-
-'Then it will be too late. The critics will have expressed their opinion;
-the work will be judged. There are only one or two points about which I am
-doubtful. I wish Harding were here. I cannot work unless I have some one to
-talk to about my work. I don't mean to say that I take advice; but the very
-fact of reading an act to a sympathetic listener helps me. I wrote the
-first act of _Divorce_ in that way. It was all wrong. I had some vague
-ideas about how it might be mended. A friend came in; I told him my
-difficulties; in telling them they vanished, and I wrote an entirely new
-act that very night.'
-
-'I'm sorry,' said Mrs. Bentley, 'that I am not Mr. Harding. It must be very
-gratifying to one's feelings to be able to help to solve a literary
-difficulty, particularly if one cannot write oneself.'
-
-'But you can--I'm sure you can. I remember asking your advice once before;
-it was excellent, and was of immense help to me. Are you sure it will not
-bore you? I shall be so much obliged if you will.'
-
-'Bore me! No, it won't bore me,' said Mrs. Bentley. 'I'm sure I feel very
-much flattered.' The colour mounted to her cheek, a smile was on her lips;
-but it went out at the sight of Emily's face.
-
-'Then come up to my study. We shall have just time to get through the first
-act before dinner.'
-
-Mrs. Bentley hesitated; and, noticing her hesitation, Hubert looked
-surprised. At that moment Emily said--
-
-'May I not come too?'
-
-'Well, I don't know, Emily. You see that we wish to see if there is
-anything in the play that a young girl should not hear.'
-
-'Always an excuse to get rid of me. You want to be alone. I never come into
-the room that you do not stop speaking. Oh, I can bear it no longer!'
-
-'My dear Emily!'
-
-'Don't touch me! Go to her; shut yourself up together. Don't think of me. I
-can bear it no longer!' And she fled from the room, leaving behind her a
-sensation of alarm and pity. Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood looking at each
-other, both at a loss for words. At last he said--
-
-'That poor child will cry herself into her grave. Have you noticed how
-poorly she is looking?'
-
-'Not noticed! But you do not know half of it. It has been going on now a
-long time. You don't know half!'
-
-'I have noticed that things are not settling down as I hoped they would. It
-really has become quite dreadful to see that poor face looking
-reproachfully at you all day long. And I am quite at a loss to know what's
-the right thing to do.'
-
-'It is worse than you think. You have not noticed that we hardly speak
-now?'
-
-'You--who were such friends--surely not!'
-
-Then she told him hurriedly, in brief phrases, of the change that had taken
-place in Emily in the last three months. 'It was only the other night she
-accused me of going after you, of having designs upon you. It is very
-painful to have to tell you these things, but I have no choice in the
-matter. She lay on her bed crying, saying that every one hated her, that
-she was thoroughly miserable. Somehow she seems naturally an unhappy child.
-She was unhappy at home before she came here; but then I believe she had
-excellent reasons,--her mother was a very terrible person. However, all
-that is past; we have to consider the present now. She accused me of having
-designs on you, insisting all the while that every one was talking about
-it, and that she was fretting solely because of my good name. Of course, it
-is very ridiculous; but it is very pitiful, and will end badly if we don't
-take means to put a stop to it. I shouldn't be surprised if she went off
-her head. We ought to have the best medical advice.'
-
-'This is very serious,' he said. And then, at the end of a long silence, he
-said again, 'This is very serious--perhaps far more serious than we think.'
-
-'Not more serious than I think. I ought to have spoken about it to you
-before; but the subject is a delicate one. She hardly sleeps at all at
-night; she cries sometimes for hours; she works herself up into such fits
-of nervousness that she doesn't know what she is saying,--accuses me of
-killing her, and then repents, declaring that I am the only one who has
-ever cared for her, and begs of me not to leave her. I do assure you it is
-becoming very serious.'
-
-'Have you any proposal to make regarding her? I need hardly say that I'm
-ready to carry out any idea of yours.'
-
-'You know what the cause of it is, I suppose?'
-
-'I do not know; I am not certain. I daresay I'm mistaken.'
-
-'No, you are not; I wish you were--that is to say, unless---- But I was
-saying that it is most serious. The child's health is affected; she is
-working herself up into an awful state of mind; she is losing all
-self-control. I'm sure I'm the last person who would say anything against
-her; but the time has come to speak out. Well, the other day, when we were
-at the Eastwicks, you took the chair next to mine when she left the room.
-When she returned, she saw that you had changed your place, and she said to
-Ethel Eastwick, "Oh, I'm fainting. I cannot go in there; they are
-together." Ethel had to take her up to her room. Well, this morbid
-sensitiveness is most unhealthy. If I walk out on the terrace, she follows,
-thinking that I have made an appointment to meet you. Jealousy of me fills
-up her whole mind. I assure you that I am most seriously alarmed. Something
-occurs every day--trifles, no doubt; and in anybody else they would mean
-nothing, but in her they mean a great deal.'
-
-'But what do you propose?'
-
-'Unless you intend to marry her--forgive me for speaking so plain--there is
-only one thing to do. I must leave.'
-
-'No, no; you must not leave! She could not live alone with me. But does she
-want you to leave?'
-
-'No; that is the worst of it. I have proposed it; she will not hear of it;
-to mention the subject is to provoke a scene. She is afraid if I left that
-you would come and see me; and the very thought of my escaping her
-vigilance is intolerable.'
-
-'It is very strange.'
-
-'Yes, it is very strange; but, opposed though she be to all thoughts of it,
-I must leave.'
-
-'As a favour I ask you to stay. Do me this service, I beg of you. I have
-set my heart on finishing my play this autumn. If it isn't finished now, it
-never will be finished; and your leaving would create so much trouble that
-all thought of work would be out of the question. Emily could not remain
-alone here with me. I should have to find another companion for her; and
-you know how difficult that would be. I'm worried quite enough as it is.' A
-look of pain passed through his eyes, and Mrs. Bentley wondered what he he
-could mean. 'No,' he said, taking her hands, 'we are good friends--are we
-not? Do me this service. Stay with me until I finish this play; then, if
-things do not mend, go, if you like, but not now. Will you promise me?'
-
-'I promise.'
-
-'Thank you. I am deeply obliged to you.'
-
-At the end of a long silence, Hubert said, 'Will you not come up-stairs,
-and let me read you the first act?'
-
-'I should like to, but I think it better not. If Emily heard that you had
-read me your play, she would not close her eyes to-night; it would be tears
-and misery all the night through.'
-
-
-
-
-XVI
-
-
-The study in which he had determined to write his masterpiece had been
-fitted up with taste and care. The floor was covered with a rare Persian
-carpet, and the walls were lined with graceful bookcases of Chippendale
-design; the volumes, half morocco, calf, and the yellow paper of French
-novels, showed through the diamond panes. The writing-table stood in front
-of the window; like the bookcases, it was Chippendale, and on the dark
-mahogany the handsome silver inkstand seemed to invite literary
-composition. There was a scent of flowers in the room. Emily had filled a
-bowl of old china with some pale September roses. The curtains were made of
-a modern cretonne--their colour was similar to the bowl of roses; and the
-large couch on which Hubert lay was covered with the same material. On one
-wall there was a sea-piece by Courbet, and upon another a river landscape,
-with rosy-tinted evening sky, by Corot. The chimney-piece was set out with
-a large gilt timepiece, and candelabra in Dresden china. Hubert had bought
-these works of art on the occasion of his last visit to London, about two
-months ago.
-
-It was twelve o'clock. He had finished reading his second act, and the
-reading had been a bitter disappointment. The idea floated, pure and
-seductive, in his mind; but when he tried to reduce it to a precise shape
-upon paper, it seemed to escape in some vague, mysterious way. Enticingly,
-like a butterfly it fluttered before him; he followed like a child,
-eagerly--his brain set on the mazy flight. It led him through a country
-where all was promise of milk and honey. He followed, sure that the
-alluring spirit would soon choose a flower; then he would capture it. Often
-it seemed to settle. He approached with palpitating heart; but lo! when the
-net was withdrawn it was empty.
-
-A look of pain and perplexity came upon his face; he remembered the lodging
-at seven shillings a week in the Tottenham Court Road. He had suffered
-there; but it seemed to him that he was suffering more here. He had changed
-his surroundings, but he had not changed himself. Success and failure,
-despair and hope, joy and sorrow, lie within and not without us. His pain
-lay at his heart's root; he could not pluck it forth, and its gratification
-seemed more than ever impossible. He changed his position on the couch.
-Suddenly his thoughts said, 'Perhaps I am mistaken in the subject. Perhaps
-that is the reason. Perhaps there is no play to be extracted from it;
-perhaps it would be better to abandon it and choose another.' For a few
-seconds he scanned the literary horizon of his mind. 'No, no!' he said
-bitterly, 'this is the play I was born to write. No other subject is
-possible; I can think of nothing else. This is all I can feel or see.' It
-was the second act that now defied his efforts. It had once seemed clear
-and of exquisite proportions; now no second act seemed possible: the
-subject did not seem to admit of a second act; and, clasping his forehead
-with his hands, he strove to think it out.
-
-Any distraction from the haunting pain, now become chronic, is welcome, and
-he answers with a glad 'Come in!' the knock at the door.
-
-'I'm sorry,' said Mrs. Bentley, 'for disturbing you, but I should like to
-know what fish you would like for your dinner--soles, turbot, or whiting?
-Immersed in literary problems as you are, I daresay these details are very
-prosaic; but I notice that later in the day----'
-
-Hubert laughed. 'I find such details far more agreeable than literature. I
-can do nothing with my play.'
-
-'Aren't you getting on this morning?'
-
-'No, not very well.'
-
-'What do you think of turbot?'
-
-'I think turbot very nice. Emily likes turbot.'
-
-'Very well, then. I'll order turbot.'
-
-As Mrs. Bentley was about to withdraw, she said, 'I'm sorry you are not
-getting on. What stops you now? That second act?'
-
-'Come, you are not very busy. I'll read you the act as it stands, and then
-tell you how I think it ought to be altered. Nothing helps me so much as to
-talk it over; not only does it clear up my ideas, but it gives me desire to
-write. My best work has always been done in that way.'
-
-'I really don't think I can stay. If Emily heard that you had been reading
-your play to me----'
-
-'I'm tired of hearing of what Emily thinks. I can put up with a good deal,
-and I know that it is my duty to show much forbearance; but there is a
-limit to all things!' This was the first time Mrs. Bentley had seen him
-show either excitement or anger; she hardly knew him in this new aspect. In
-a moment the blonde calm of the Saxon had dropped from him, and some Celtic
-emphasis appeared in his speech. 'This hysterical girl,' he continued, 'is
-a sore burden. Tears about this, and sighs about that; fainting fits
-because I happen to take a chair next to yours. You may depend upon it our
-lives are already the constant gossip of the neighbourhood.'
-
-'I know it is very annoying; and I, I assure you, receive my share. Every
-look and word is misinterpreted. I must not stay here.'
-
-'You must not go! I really want you. I assure you that your opinion will be
-of value.'
-
-'But think of Emily. It will make her wretched if she hears of it. You do
-not know how it affects her. The slightest thing! You hardly see anything;
-I see it all.'
-
-'But there is no sense in it; it is pure madness. I'm writing a play,
-trying to work out a most difficult problem, and am in want of an audience,
-and I ask you if you will be kind enough to let me read you the act, and
-you cannot listen to it because--because--yes, that's just it--because!'
-
-'You do not know how she suffers. Let me go; spare her the pain.'
-
-'She is not the only one who suffers. Do you think that I don't suffer?
-I've set my heart--my very life is set on this play. I must get through
-with it; they are all waiting for it. My enemies say I cannot write it, but
-I shall if you will help me.'
-
-[Illustration: "Sometimes, in an exciting passage, the hands were
-clasped."]
-
-'Poor Emily's heart is equally broken. Her life is equally set----' Mrs.
-Bentley did not finish. Hubert just caught the words. Their significance
-struck him; he looked questioningly into Mrs. Bentley's eyes; then,
-pretending not to have understood, he begged her to remain. With the air of
-one who yields to a temptation, she came into the room. He felt strangely
-happy, and, drawing over an arm-chair for her, he threw himself on the
-couch. He noticed that she wore a loose white jacket, and once during the
-reading of the act he was conscious of a beautiful hand hanging over the
-rail of the chair. Sometimes, in an exciting passage, the hands were
-clasped. The black slippers and the slender black-stockinged ankles showed
-beneath the skirt; and when he raised his eyes from the manuscript, he saw
-the blonde face and hair, and the pale eyes were always fixed upon him. She
-listened with a keen and penetrating interest to his criticism of the act,
-agreeing with him generally, sometimes quietly contesting a point, and with
-some strange fascination drawing new and unexpected ideas from him; and in
-the intellectual warmth of her femininity his brain seemed to clear and his
-ideas took new shape.
-
-'Ah,' he said, after two hours' delightful talk, 'how much I'm indebted to
-you! At last I see my mistakes; in two days I shall have written the act.
-And he wrote rapidly for nearly two hours, reconstructing the opening
-scenes of his second act.' He then threw himself on the couch, smoked a
-cigar, and after half an hour's rest continued writing till dinner-time.
-
-When he came down-stairs, the thought of what he had been writing was still
-so vivid in him that he did not notice at once the silence of those with
-whom he was dining. He complimented Mrs. Bentley on the freshness of the
-turbot; she hardly answered; and then he became aware that something had
-gone wrong. What? Only one thing was possible. Emily had heard that Mrs.
-Bentley had been in his study. Looking from the woman to the girl, he saw
-that the latter had been weeping. She was still in a highly hysterical
-state, and might burst into tears and fly from the dinner-table at any
-moment. His face changed expression, and it was with difficulty that he
-restrained his temper. His life had been made up of a constant recurrence
-of these scenes, and he was wholly weary of them; and the thought of the
-absolute want of reason in the causeless jealousy, and the misery that
-these little bickerings made of his life, exasperated him beyond measure.
-The dinner proceeded in silence, and every slight remark was a presage of
-storm. Hubert hoped the girl would say nothing until the servant left the
-room, and with that view he never spoke a word except to ask the ladies
-what they would take to eat. These tactics might have succeeded if Mrs.
-Bentley had not unfortunately said that next week she intended to go to
-London for a couple of days. 'The Eastwicks are there now, and they've
-asked me to stay with them.'
-
-'I think I shall go up with you. I want to go to London,' said Emily.
-
-'It will be very nice if you'll come; but we cannot both stay with the
-Eastwicks; they have only one spare room.'
-
-'I suppose you'd like me to go to an hotel.'
-
-'My dear Emily, how can you think of such a thing? A young girl like you
-could not stay at an hotel alone. I shall be only too pleased if you will
-go to the Eastwicks; I will go to the hotel.'
-
-Emily's lip quivered, and in the irritating silence both Hubert and Mrs.
-Bentley saw that she was trying to overcome her passion. They fervently
-hoped she would succeed; for at that moment the servant was handing round
-the wine, and the time he took to accomplish this service seemed endless.
-He had filled the last glass, had handed round the dessert, and was
-preparing to leave the room when Emily said--
-
-'The hotel will suit you very well. You'll be free to see Hubert whenever
-you like.'
-
-Hubert looked up quickly, hoping Mrs. Bentley would not answer, but before
-he could make a sign she said--
-
-'What do you mean, Emily? I did not know that Hubert was going to London.'
-
-'You hardly expect me to believe that, do you?'
-
-The servant was still in the room; but no look of astonishment appeared on
-his face, and Hubert hoped he had not heard. An awful silence glowered upon
-the dinner-table. The moment the door closed Hubert said, turning angrily
-to Emily--
-
-'Really, I am quite surprised, Emily, that you should make such
-observations in the presence of servants! This has been going on quite long
-enough; you are making the house intolerable. I shall not be able to live
-here any longer.'
-
-Emily burst into a passionate flood of tears. She declared she was
-wretchedly miserable, and that she fully understood that Hubert had begun
-to regret that he had asked her to stay at Ashwood. Everything had been
-taken from her; every one was against her. Her sobs shook her frail little
-frame as if they would break it, and Hubert's heart was wrung at the sight
-of such genuine suffering.
-
-'My dear Emily, I assure you you are mistaken. We both love you very much.'
-He got up from his chair, and, putting his arm about her, besought her to
-dry her eyes; but she shook him passionately from her, and fled from the
-room.
-
-Three days after, Emily tore up one of her songs, because Mrs. Bentley had
-sung it without her leave. And so on and so on, week after week. No sooner
-was one quarrel allayed than signs of another began to appear. Hubert
-despaired. 'How is this to end?' he asked himself every day. Mrs. Bentley
-begged him to cancel her promise, and allow her to go. But that was
-impossible. He could not remain alone with Emily; if he left her she would
-not fail to believe that he had gone after her rival. The situation had
-become so tense that they ended by discussing these questions almost
-without reserve. To make matters worse, Emily had begun visibly to lose her
-health. There was neither colour in her cheeks nor light in her eyes; she
-hardly slept at all, and had grown more than ever like a little shadow. The
-doctor had been summoned, and, after prescribing a tonic, had advised quiet
-and avoidance of all excitement. Therefore Hubert and Mrs. Bentley agreed
-never to meet except when Emily was present, and then strove to speak as
-little as possible to each other. But the very fact of having to restrain
-themselves in looks, glances, and every slightest word--for Emily
-misinterpreted all things--whetted their appetites for each other's
-society.
-
-In the misery of his study, when he watched the sheet of paper, he often
-sought relief in remembrance of her sweet manner, and the happy morning he
-had spent in her companionship. What he had written under the direct
-influence of her inspiration still seemed to him to be less bad than the
-rest of his play; and he began to feel sure that, if ever this play were
-written, it would be written in the benign charm of her sweet
-encouragement, in the reposeful shadow of her presence. But that presence
-was forbidden him--that presence that seemed so necessary; and for what
-reason? Turning on the circumstances of his life, he raged against them,
-declaring that it would be folly to allow his very life's desire to be
-frittered away to gratify a young girl's caprice,--a caprice which in a few
-years she would laugh at. And whenever he was not thinking of his play, he
-remembered the charm of Mrs. Bentley's company, and the beneficent effect
-it had on his work. He had never known a woman he had liked so much, and he
-felt--he started at the thought, so like an inspiration did it seem to
-him--that the only possible solution of the present situation was his
-marriage with her. Once he was married, Emily would soon learn to forget
-him. They would take her up to London for the season; and, amid the healthy
-excitement of balls and parties, her girlish fancy would evaporate. No
-doubt she would meet again the young cavalry officer whose addresses she
-had received so coldly. She would be sure to meet him again--be sure to
-think him the most charming man in the world; they would marry, and she
-would make him the best possible wife. The kindest action they could do
-Emily would be to marry. There was nothing else to do, and they must do
-something, or else the girl would die. It seemed wonderful to Hubert that
-he had not thought of all this before. 'It is the very obvious solution of
-the problem,' he said; and his heart beat as he heard Mrs. Bentley's step
-in the corridor. It died away in the distance; but a few days after, when
-he heard it again, he jumped from his chair, and ran to the door. 'Come,'
-he said, 'I want to speak to you.'
-
-'No, no, I beg of you!'
-
-'I must speak to you!' He laid his hand upon her arm, and said, 'I beg of
-you. I have something to say--it is of great importance. Come in.'
-
-They looked at each other a moment, and it seemed as if they could see into
-each other's souls. Then a look of yielding passed into her eyes, and she
-said--
-
-'Well, what is it?'
-
-The familiarity of the words struck her, and she saw by the kindling
-tenderness in his eyes that they had given him pleasure. She almost knew he
-was going to tell her that he loved her. He looked towards the open door,
-and, guessing his intention, she said--
-
-'Don't shut it! Speak quickly. Remember that she may pass at any moment.
-Were she to find us together, she would suffer; it would be tears and
-reproaches. What you have to say to me is about her?'
-
-'Of course; we never speak of anything else. But we must not be overheard.
-I must shut the door.' She noticed a certain embarrassment in his manner.
-Suddenly relinquishing his intention to take her hands, he said--
-
-'This cannot go on; our lives are being made unbearable. You agree with
-me--do you not?'
-
-'Yes,' she said, with a curious inquiring look in her eyes. 'You had better
-let me leave. It is the only way out of the difficulty.'
-
-'You know very well, Julia, that that is impossible.'
-
-It was the first time he had used her Christian name, and she knew now he
-was going to ask her to marry him. A frightened look passed into her face;
-she turned from him; he took her hands.
-
-'No, Julia,' he said; 'there is another and better way out of the
-difficulty. You will stop here--you will be my wife?' Reading the look of
-pain that had come into her eyes, he said, 'You will not refuse me? I want
-you--I can do nothing without you. If you leave me, I shall never be able
-to write my play; it can only be written under your influence. I love you,
-Julia!' She allowed him to draw her towards him, and then she broke away.
-
-'Oh,' she said, 'why do you say these things? You only make my task harder.
-You know that I cannot betray my friend. Why do you tempt me to do a
-dishonourable action?'
-
-'A dishonourable action! What do you mean? It is the only way to save her.
-Once we are married, she will forget. No doubt she will shed a few tears;
-but to save the body we must often lose a limb. It is even so. Things
-cannot go on as they are. We cannot watch her withering away under our very
-eyes; and that is what is actually happening. I have thought it all over,
-considered it from every point of view, and have come to the conclusion
-that--that, well, that we had better marry. You must have seen that I
-always liked you. I did not myself know how much until a few days ago. Say
-that I am not wholly disagreeable to you.'
-
-'No; I will not listen to you! My conscience tells me plainly where my duty
-lies. Not for all the world will I play Emily false. I shudder to think of
-such a thing; it would be the basest ingratitude. I owe everything to her.
-When I hadn't a penny in the world, and when in my homelessness I wrote to
-Mr. Burnett, she pleaded in my favour, and decided him to take me as a
-companion. No, no! a thousand times no! Let go my hands. Do you not know
-what it is to be loyal?'
-
-'I hope I do. But, as I have explained, it is the only solution. The
-romantic attachments of young girls, unless nipped in the bud, often end
-fatally. Do you not see how ill she is looking? She is wearing her life
-away. We shall be acting in her best interests. Besides, she is not the
-only person to be considered. Do I not love you? Are you not the very woman
-whose influence, whose guidance, is necessary, so that I should succeed?
-Without your help I shall never write my play. A woman's influence is
-necessary to every undertaking. The greatest writers owe their best
-inspiration to----'
-
-'Her heart is as closely set upon you as yours is upon your play.'
-
-'But,' cried Hubert, 'I do not love her! Under no circumstances would I
-marry her. That I swear to you. If she and I were alone on a desert
-island----'
-
-Julia looked at him one moment doubtingly, inquiringly. Then she said--
-
-'Hers is no evanescent fancy, but a passion that goes to the very roots of
-her nature, and will kill her if it be not satisfied.'
-
-'Or cut out in time.'
-
-'I must leave.'
-
-'That will not mend matters.'
-
-'My departure will, at all events, remove all cause for jealousy; and when
-I am gone you may learn to love her.'
-
-'No; that I swear is impossible!'
-
-'You very likely think so now; but I'm bound to give her every chance of
-winning you.'
-
-'I say again that that is impossible! I have never seen a woman except
-yourself I could marry. I tell you so: believe me as you like.... In this
-matter you are acting like a woman,--you allow your emotions and not your
-intellect to lead you. By acting thus, you are certainly sacrificing two
-lives--hers and mine. Of your own I do not speak, not knowing what is
-passing in your heart; but if by any chance you should care for me, you are
-adding your own happiness to the general holocaust.' Neither spoke again
-for some time.
-
-'Why should you not marry her?' Julia said, at the end of a long silence.
-'Some people think her quite a pretty girl.'
-
-The lovers looked at each other and smiled sadly. And then, in pathetic
-phrases, Hubert tried to explain why he could never love Emily. He spoke of
-his age, and of difference of tastes,--he liked clever women. The
-conversation fell. At the end of a long silence, Julia said--
-
-'There is nothing for it but my departure, and the sooner the better.'
-
-'You are not in earnest? You are surely not in earnest?'
-
-'Yes, indeed I am.'
-
-'Then, if you go, you must take her with you. She cannot remain here alone
-with me. And even if she could, I could not live with her. Her folly has
-destroyed any liking I may have ever had for her. You'll have to take her
-with you.'
-
-'She would not come with me. I spoke to her once of a trip abroad.'
-
-'And she refused?'
-
-'She said she only wanted things to go on just as they are.'
-
-
-
-
-XVII
-
-
-In some trepidation Julia knocked. Receiving no reply, she opened the door,
-and her candle burnt in what a moment before must have been inky darkness.
-Emily lay on her bed--on the edge of it; and the only movement she made was
-to avert her eyes from the light. 'What! all alone in this darkness,
-Emily!... Shall I light your candles?' She had to repeat the question
-before she could get an answer.
-
-'No, thank you; I want nothing; I have no wish to see anything. I like the
-dark.'
-
-'Have you been asleep?'
-
-'No; I have not.... Why do you come to torment me? It cannot matter to you
-whether I lie in the dark or the light. Oh, take that candle away! it is
-blinding me.' Julia put the candle on the washstand. Then full of pity for
-the grieving girl, she stood, her hand resting on the bed-rail.
-
-'Aren't you coming down to dinner, Emily? Come, let me pour out some water
-for you. When you have bathed your eyes----'
-
-'I don't want any dinner.'
-
-'It will look very strange if you remain in your room the whole evening.
-You do not want to vex him, do you?'
-
-'I suppose he is very angry with me. But I did not mean to vex him. Is he
-very angry?'
-
-'No, he is not angry at all; he is merely distressed. You distress him
-dreadfully when----'
-
-'I don't know why I should distress him. I'm sure I don't mean to. You know
-more about it than I. You are always whispering together--talking about
-me.'
-
-'I assure you, Emily, you are mistaken. Mr. Price and I have no secrets
-whatever.'
-
-'Why should you tell me these falsehoods? They make me so miserable.'
-
-'Falsehoods, Emily! When did you ever know me to tell a falsehood?'
-
-'You say you have no secrets! Do you think I am blind? You think, I
-suppose, I did not see you showing him a ring? You took it off, too; and I
-suppose you gave it to him,--an engagement ring, very likely.'
-
-'I lost a stone from my ring, and I asked Mr. Price if he would take the
-ring to London and have the stone replaced.... That is all. So you see how
-your imagination has run away with you.'
-
-Emily did not answer. At last she said, breaking the silence abruptly--
-
-'Is he very angry? Has he gone to his study? Do you think he will come down
-to dinner?'
-
-'I suppose he'll come down for dinner.'
-
-'Will you go and ask him?'
-
-'I hardly see how I can do that. He is very busy.... And if you would
-listen to any advice of mine, it would be to leave him to himself as much
-as possible for the present. He is so taken up with his play; I know he's
-most anxious about it.'
-
-'Is he? I don't know. He never speaks to me about it. I hate that play, and
-I hate to see him go up to that study! I cannot understand why he should
-trouble himself about writing plays; he doesn't want the money, and it
-can't be agreeable sitting up there all alone thinking.... It is easy to
-see that it only makes him unhappy. But you encourage him to go on with it.
-Oh yes, you do; there's no use saying you don't. You are always talking to
-him about it; you bring the conversation up. You think I don't see how you
-do it, but I do; and you like doing it, because then you have him all to
-yourself. I can't talk to him about that play; and I wouldn't if I could,
-for it only makes him unhappy. But you don't care whether he's unhappy or
-not; you only think of yourself.'
-
-'You surely don't believe what you are saying is true? To-morrow you will
-be sorry for what you have said. You cannot think that I would deceive you,
-Emily? Remember what friends we have been.'
-
-'I remember everything. You think I don't; but I do. And you think also
-that there's no reason why I should be miserable; but there is. Because you
-do not feel my misery, you think it doesn't exist. I daresay you think,
-too, that you are very good and kind; but you aren't. You think you deceive
-me; but you don't. I know all that is passing between you and Hubert. I
-know a great deal more than I can explain....'
-
-'But tell me, Emily, what is it you suspect? What do you accuse me of?'
-
-'I accuse you of nothing. Can't you understand that things may go wrong
-without it being any one's fault in particular?'
-
-Julia wondered how Emily could think so wisely. She seemed to have grown
-wiser in her grief. But grief helped her no further in her instinctive
-perception of the truth, and she resumed her puerile attack on her friend.
-
-'Nothing has gone well with me ever since you came here. I was
-disinherited; and I daresay you were glad, for you knew that if the money
-did not come to me it would go to Hubert, and I do know----'
-
-'What are you saying, Emily? I never heard of such wild accusations before!
-You know very well that I never set eyes on Mr. Price until he came down
-here.'
-
-'How should I know what you know or don't know? But I know that all my life
-every one has been plotting against me. And I cannot make out why. I never
-did harm to any one.'
-
-The conversation paused. Emily flung herself back on the pillow. Not even a
-sob. The candle burned like a long yellow star in the shadows, yielding
-only sufficient light for Julia to see the outlines of a somewhat untidy
-room,--an old-fashioned mahogany wardrobe, cloudy and black, upon
-old-fashioned grey paper, some cardboard boxes, and a number of china
-ornaments, set out on a small table covered with a tablecloth in
-crewel-work.
-
-'I would do anything in the world for you, Emily. I am your best friend,
-and yet----'
-
-'I have no friend. I don't believe in friends. You think people are your
-friends, and then you find they are not.'
-
-'How can I convince you of the injustice of your suspicions?'
-
-'I see all plainly enough; it is fate, I suppose.... Selfishness. We all
-think of ourselves--we can't help it; and that's what makes life so
-miserable.... He would be a very good match. You have got him to like you.
-Perhaps you didn't intend to; but you have done it all the same.'
-
-'But, Emily dear, listen! There is no question of marriage between me and
-Mr. Price. If you will only have patience, things will come right in the
-end.'
-
-'For you, perhaps.'
-
-'Emily, Emily! ... You should try to understand things better.'
-
-'I feel them, even if I don't understand.'
-
-'Admit that you were wrong about the ring. Have I not convinced you that
-you were wrong?'
-
-Emily did not answer. But at the end of a long silence, in which she had
-been pursuing a different train of thought, she said, 'Then you mean that
-he has never asked you to marry him?'
-
-The directness of the question took Julia by surprise, and, falsehood being
-unnatural to her, she hesitated, hardly knowing what to answer. Her
-hesitation was only momentary; but in that moment there came up such a wave
-of pity for the grief-stricken girl that she lied for pity's sake, 'No, he
-never asked me to marry him. I assure you that he never did. If you do not
-believe me----' As she was about to say, 'I will swear it if you like,' an
-irresponsible sensation of pride in her ownership of his love surged up
-through her, overwhelming her will, and she ended the sentence, 'I am very
-sorry, but I cannot help it.'
-
-The words were still well enough; it was in the accent that the truth
-transpired. And then yielding still further to the force which had
-subjugated her will, she said--
-
-'I admit that we have talked about a great many things.' (Again she strove
-not to speak, but the words rose red-hot to her lips.) 'He has said that he
-would like to marry, but I should not think of accepting----'
-
-'Then it is just as I thought!' Emily cried; 'he wants to get rid of me!'
-
-Julia was shocked and surprised at the depth of disgraceful vanity and
-cowardice which special circumstances had brought within her consciousness.
-The Julia Bentley of the last few moments was not the Julia Bentley she was
-accustomed to meet and interrogate, and she asked herself how she might
-exorcise the meanness that had so unexpectedly appeared in her. Should she
-pile falsehood on falsehood? She felt it would be cruel not to do so; but
-Emily said, 'He wants to marry to get rid of me, and not because he loves
-you.' Then it was hard to deny herself the pleasure of telling the whole
-truth; but she mastered her desire of triumph, and, actuated by nothing but
-sincerest love and pity, she said--
-
-'Oh, Emily dear, he never asked me to marry him; he does not love me at
-all! Why will you not believe me?'
-
-'Because I cannot!' she cried passionately. 'I only ask to be left alone.'
-
-'A little patience, Emily, and all will come right. Mr. Price does not want
-to get rid of you. You wrong him just as you wrong me. He has often said
-how much he likes you; indeed he has.' Although speaking from the bottom of
-her heart, it seemed to Julia that she was playing the part of a cruel,
-false woman, who was designingly plotting to betray a helpless girl; and
-not understanding why this was so, she was at once puzzled and confused. It
-seemed to her that she was being borne on in a wind of destiny, and her
-will seemed to beat vainly against it, like a bird's wings when a storm is
-blowing. She was conscious of a curious powerlessness; it surprised her,
-and she could not understand why she continued talking, so vain and useless
-did words seem to her--an idle patter. She continued--
-
-'You think that I stand between you and Mr. Price. Now, I assure you that
-it is not so. I tell you I should refuse Mr. Price, even if he were to ask
-me to marry him, here, at this very moment. I pledge you my word on this.
-Give me your hand, Emily. You will not refuse it?' Emily gave her hand. 'It
-is quite ridiculous to promise, for he will never ask me; but I promise not
-to marry him even if he should ask me.' She gave the promise, determined to
-keep it; and yet she knew she would not keep it. She argued passionately
-with herself, a prey to an inward dread; for no matter how firmly she
-forced resolution upon resolution, they all seemed to melt in her soul like
-snow on a blazing fire. Then, determined to rid herself of a numb sensation
-of powerlessness, and achieve the end she desired, she said, 'I'll tell
-you, Emily, what I'll do. I'll not stay here; I will go away. Let me go
-away, dear, and then it will be all right.'
-
-'No, no! you mustn't leave; I don't want you to leave. It would be said
-everywhere that I had you sent away.... You promise me not to leave?'
-Raising herself, Emily clung to Julia's arm, detaining her until she had
-extorted the desired promise.
-
-'Very well; I promise,' she said sadly. 'But I think you are wrong; indeed
-I do. I have always thought that "the only solution of the problem" was my
-departure.' Memory had betrayed her into Hubert's own phrase.
-
-'Why should you go? You think, I suppose, that I'm in love with Hubert? I'm
-not. All I want is for things to go on just the same--for us to be friends
-as we were before.'
-
-'Very well, Emily--very well.... But in the meantime you must not neglect
-your meals as you have been doing lately. If you don't take care, you'll
-lose your health and your looks. I have been noticing how thin you are
-looking.'
-
-'I suppose you have told him that I am looking thin and ill.... Men like
-tall, big, healthy women like you--don't they?'
-
-'I see, Emily, that it is hopeless; every word one utters is
-misinterpreted. Dinner will be ready in a few minutes; or, if you like, I
-will dine up-stairs; and you and Mr. Price----'
-
-'But is he coming down to dinner? I thought you said he had gone to his
-study; sometimes he dines there.'
-
-'I can tell you nothing about Mr. Price. I don't know whether he'll dine
-up-stairs or down.'
-
-At that moment a knock was heard at the door, and the servant announced
-that dinner was ready. 'Mr. Price has sent down word, ma'am, that he is
-very busy writing; he hopes you'll excuse him, and he'll be glad if you
-will send him his dinner up on a tray.'
-
-'Very well; I shall be down directly.'
-
-The slight interruption had sufficed to calm Julia's irritation, and she
-stood waiting for Emily. But seeing that she showed no signs of moving, she
-said, 'Aren't you coming down to dinner, Emily?' It was a sense of strict
-duty that impelled the question, for her heart sank at the prospect of
-spending the evening alone with the girl. But seeing the tears on Emily's
-cheeks, she sat down beside her, and said, 'Dearest Emily, if you would
-only confide in me!'
-
-'There's nothing to confide....'
-
-'You mustn't give way like this; you really mustn't. Come down and have
-some dinner.'
-
-'It is no use; I couldn't eat anything.'
-
-'He may come into the drawing-room in the course of the evening, and will
-be so disappointed and grieved to hear that you have not been down.'
-
-'No; he will spend the whole evening in his room; we shall not see him
-again.'
-
-'But if I go and ask him to come; if I tell him----'
-
-'No; do not speak to him about me; he'd only say that I was interfering
-with his work.'
-
-'That is unjust, Emily; he has never reproached you with interfering with
-his work. Shall I go and tell him that you won't come down because you
-think he is angry with you?'
-
-Ten minutes passed, and no answer could be obtained from Emily--only
-passionate and illusive refusals, denials, prayer to be left alone; and
-these mingled with irritating suggestions that Julia had better go at once,
-that Hubert might be waiting for her. But Julia bore patiently with her and
-did not leave her until Hubert sent to know why his dinner was delayed.
-
-Emily had begun to undress; and, tearing off her things, she hardly took
-more than five minutes to get into bed.
-
-'Shall I light a candle?' Julia asked before leaving.
-
-'No, thank you.'
-
-'Shall I send you up some soup?'
-
-'No; I could not touch it.'
-
-'You are not going to remain in the dark? Let me light a night-light?'
-
-'No, thank you; I like the dark.'
-
-
-
-
-XVIII
-
-
-Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood by the chimney-piece in the drawing-room,
-waiting for the doctor; they had left him with Emily, and stood facing each
-other absorbed in thought, when the door opened, and the doctor entered.
-Hubert said--
-
-'What do you think, Doctor? Is she seriously ill?'
-
-'There is nothing, so far as I can make out, organically the matter with
-her, but the system is running down. She is very thin and weak. I shall
-prescribe a tonic, but----'
-
-'But what, doctor?'
-
-'She seems to be suffering from extreme depression of spirits. Do you know
-of any secret grief--any love affair? At her age, anything of that sort
-fills the entire mind, and the consequences are often grave.'
-
-'And supposing it were so, what would be your advice? Change of air and
-scene?'
-
-'Certainly.'
-
-'Have you spoken to her on the subject?'
-
-'Yes; but she says she will not leave Ashwood.'
-
-'We cannot send her away by force. What would you advise us to do?'
-
-'There's nothing to be done. We must hope for the best. There is no
-immediate cause for fear.... But, by the way, she looks as if she suffered
-from sleeplessness.'
-
-'Yes, she does; but she has been ordered chloral. Any harm in that?'
-
-'In her case, it is a necessity; but do you think she takes it?'
-
-'Oh yes, she has been taking choral.'
-
-The conversation paused; the doctor went over to the writing-table, wrote a
-prescription, made a few remarks, and took his leave, announcing his
-intention of returning that day fortnight.
-
-Hubert said, and his tone implied reference to some anterior conversation,
-'We are powerless in this matter. You see we can do nothing. We only
-succeed in making ourselves unhappy; we do not change in anything. I am
-wretchedly unhappy!'
-
-'Believe me,' she said, raising her arms in a beautiful feminine movement,
-'I do not wish to make you unhappy.'
-
-'Then why do you persist? Why do you refuse to take the only step that may
-lead us out of this difficulty?'
-
-'How can you ask me? Oh, Hubert, I did not think you could be so cruel! It
-would be a shameful action.'
-
-It was the first time she had used his Christian name, and his face changed
-expression.
-
-'I cannot,' she said, 'and I will not, and I do not understand how you can
-ask me--you who are so loyal, how can you ask me to be disloyal?'
-
-'Spare me your reproaches. Fate has been cruel. I have never told you the
-story of my life. I have suffered deeply; my pride has been humiliated, and
-I have endured hunger and cold; but those sufferings were light compared to
-this last misfortune.'
-
-She looked at him with sublime pity in her eyes. 'I do not conceal from
-you,' she said, 'that I love you very much. I, too, have suffered, and I
-had thought for one moment that fate had vouchsafed me happiness; but, as
-you would say--the irony of life.'
-
-'Julia, do not say you never will?'
-
-'We cannot look into the future. But this I can say--I will not do Emily
-any wrong, and so far as is in my power I will avoid giving her pain. There
-is only one way out of this difficulty. I must leave this house as soon as
-I can persuade her to let me go.'
-
-The door opened; involuntarily the speakers moved apart; and though their
-faces and attitudes were strictly composed when Emily entered, she knew
-they had been standing closer together.
-
-'I'm afraid I'm interrupting you,' she said.
-
-'No, Emily; pray do not go away. We were only talking about you.'
-
-'If I were to leave every time you begin to talk about me, I should spend
-my life in my room. I daresay you have many faults to find. Let me hear all
-about your fresh discoveries.'
-
-It was a thin November day: leaves were whirling on the lawn, and at that
-moment one blew rustling down the window-pane. And, even as it, she seemed
-a passing thing. Her face was like a plate of fine white porcelain, and the
-deep eyes filled it with a strange and magnetic pathos; the abundant
-chestnut hair hung in the precarious support of a thin tortoiseshell; and
-there was something unforgetable in the manner in which her aversion for
-the elder woman betrayed itself--a mere nothing, and yet more impressive
-than any more obvious and therefore more vulgar expression of dislike would
-have been.
-
-'A little patience, Emily. You will not have me here much longer.'
-
-'I suppose that I am so disagreeable that you cannot live with me. Why
-should you go away?'
-
-'My dear Emily, you must not excite yourself. The doctor----'
-
-'I want to know why she said she was going to leave. Has she been
-complaining about me to you? What is her reason for wanting to go?'
-
-'We do not get on together as we used to--that is all, Emily. I can please
-you no longer.'
-
-'It is not my fault if we do not get on. I don't see why we shouldn't, and
-I do not want you to go.'
-
-'Emily, dear, everything shall be as you like it.'
-
-The girl looked at him with the shy, doubting look of an animal that would
-like, and still does not dare, to go to the beckoning hand. How frail
-seemed the body in the black dress! and how thin the arms in the black
-sleeves! Hubert took the little hand in his. At his touch a look of content
-and rest passed into her eyes, and she yielded herself as the leaf yields
-to the wind. She was all his when he chose. Mrs. Bentley left the room;
-and, seeing her go, a light of sudden joy illuminated the thin, pale face;
-and when the door closed, and she was alone with him, the bleak, unhappy
-look, which had lately grown strangely habitual to her, faded out of her
-face and eyes. He fetched her shawl, and took her hand again in his,
-knowing that by so doing he made her happy. He could not refuse her the
-peace from pain that these attentions brought her, though he would have
-held himself aloof from all women but one. She knew the truth well enough;
-but they who suffer much think only of the cessation of pain. He wondered
-at the inveigling content that introduced itself into her voice, face, and
-gesture. Settling herself comfortably on the sofa, she said--
-
-'Now tell me what the doctor said. Did he say I would soon recover? Did he
-say that I was very bad? Tell me all.'
-
-'He said that you ought to have a change--that you should go south
-somewhere.'
-
-'And you agree with him that I ought to go away?'
-
-'Is he not the best judge?--the doctor's orders!'
-
-'Then you, too, have learnt to hate me. You, too, want to send me away?'
-
-'My dear Emily, I only want to do as you like. You asked me what the doctor
-said, and I told you.'
-
-Hubert got up and walked aside. He passed his hand across his eyes. He
-could hardly contain himself; the emotion that discussion with this sick
-girl caused him went to his head. She looked at him curiously, watching his
-movement, and he failed to understand what pleasure it could give her to
-have him by her side, knowing, as she clearly did, that his heart was
-elsewhere. Turning suddenly, he said--
-
-'But tell me, Emily, how are you feeling? You are, after all, the best
-judge.'
-
-'I feel rather weak. I should get strong enough if----'
-
-She paused, as if waiting for Hubert to ask her to finish the sentence. But
-he hurriedly turned the conversation.
-
-'The doctor said you looked as if you had not had any sleep for several
-nights. I told him that that was strange, for you were taking chloral.'
-
-'I sleep well enough,' she said. 'But sometimes life seems so sad, that I
-do not think I shall be able to bear with it any longer. You do not know
-how unfortunate I have been. When I was a child, father and mother used to
-quarrel always, and I was the only child. That was why Mr. Burnett asked me
-to come and live at Ashwood. I came at first on a visit; and when father
-and mother died, he said he wished to adopt me. I thought he loved me; but
-his love was only selfishness. No one has ever loved me. I feel so utterly
-alone in this world--that is why I am unhappy.'
-
-Her eyes filled with tears, and at the sight of her tears Hubert's feelings
-were overwrought, and again he had to walk aside. He would give her all
-things; but she was dying for him, and he could not save her. No longer was
-there any disguisement between them. The words they uttered were as
-nothing, so clearly did the thought shine out of their eyes, 'I am dying of
-love for you,' and then the answer, 'I know that is so, and I cannot help
-it.' Her whole soul was spoken in her eyes, and he felt that his eyes
-betrayed him equally plainly. They stood in a sort of mental nakedness. The
-woman no longer sought for words to cover herself with; the man did, but he
-did not find them. They had not spoken for some time; they had been
-thinking of each other. At last she said, and with the querulous perversity
-of the sick---
-
-'But even if I wished to go abroad, with whom could I go?'
-
-Hubert fell into the trap, and, noticing the sudden brightness in his eyes,
-a cloud of disappointment shadowed hers. 'Of course, with Mrs. Bentley. I
-assure you, my dear Emily, that you----'
-
-'No, no, I am not mistaken! She hates me, and I cannot bear her. It is she
-who is making me ill.'
-
-'Hate you! Why should she hate you?'
-
-Emily did not reply. Hubert watched her, noticing the pallor of her cheek,
-so entirely white and blue, hardly a touch of warm colour anywhere, even in
-the shadow of the heavy hair.
-
-'I would give anything to see you friends again.'
-
-'That is impossible! I can never be friends with Julia as I once was. She
-has---- No, never can we be friends again. But why do you always take her
-part against me? That is what grieves me most. If only you thought----'
-
-'Emily dear, these are but idle fancies. You are mistaken.'
-
-The conversation fell. The girl lay quite still, her hands clasped across
-the shawl, her little foot stretched beyond the limp black dress, the hem
-of which fell over the edge of the grey sofa. Hubert sat by her on a low
-chair, and he looked into the fire, whose light wavered over the walls, now
-and again bringing the face of one of the pictures out of the darkness. The
-wind whined about the windows. Then, speaking as if out of a dream, Emily
-said--
-
-'Julia and I can never be friends again--that is impossible.'
-
-'But what has she done?' Hubert asked incautiously, regretting his words as
-soon as he had uttered them.
-
-'What has she done?' she said, looking at him curiously. 'Well, one thing,
-she has got it reported that--that I am in love with you, and that that is
-the reason of my illness.'
-
-'I am sure she never said any such thing. You are entirely mistaken. Mrs.
-Bentley is incapable of such wickedness.'
-
-'A woman, when she is jealous, will say anything. If she did not say it,
-can you tell me how it got about?'
-
-'I don't believe any one ever said such a thing.'
-
-'Oh yes, lots have said so--things come back to me. Julia always was
-jealous of me. She cannot bear me to speak to you. Have you not noticed how
-she follows us? Do you think she would have left the room just now if she
-could have helped it?'
-
-'If you think this is so, had she not better leave?'
-
-Emily did not answer at once. Motionless she lay on the sofa, looking at
-the grey November day with vague eyes that bespoke an obsession of
-hallucination. Suddenly she said, 'I do not want her to go away. She would
-spread a report that I was jealous of her, and had asked you to send her
-away. No; it would not be wise to send her away. Besides,' she said, fixing
-her eyes, now full of melancholy reproach, 'you would like her to remain.'
-
-'I have said before, Emily, and I assure you I am speaking the truth, I
-want you to do what you like. Say what you wish to be done, and it shall be
-done.'
-
-'Is that really true? I thought no one cared for me. You must care for me a
-little to speak like that.'
-
-'Of course I care for you, Emily.'
-
-'I sometimes think you might have if it had not been for that play; for, of
-course, I'm not clever, and cannot discuss it with you.... Julia, I
-suppose, can--that is the reason why you like her. Am I not right?'
-
-'Mrs. Bentley is a clever woman, who has read a great deal, and I like to
-talk an act over with her before I write it.'
-
-'Is that all? Then why do people say you are going to marry her?'
-
-'But nobody ever said so.'
-
-'Oh yes, they have. Is it true?'
-
-'No, Emily; it is not true.'
-
-'Are you quite sure?'
-
-'Yes, quite sure.'
-
-'If that is so,' she said, turning her eyes on Hubert, and looking as if
-she could see right down into his soul, 'I shall get well very soon. Then
-we can go on just the same; but if you married her, I----'
-
-'I what?'
-
-'Nothing! I feel quite happy now. I did not want you to marry her. I could
-not bear it. It would be like having a step-mother--worse, for she would
-not have me here at all; she would drive me away.'
-
-Hubert shook his head.
-
-'You don't know Julia as well as I do. However, it is no use discussing
-what is not going to be. You have been very nice to-day. If you would be
-always nice, as you are to-day, I should soon get well.'
-
-Her pale profile seemed very sharp in the fading twilight, and her delicate
-arms and thin bosom were full of the charm and fascination of deciduous
-things. She turned her face and looked at Hubert. 'You have made me very
-happy. I am content.'
-
-He was afraid to look back at her, lest she should, in her subtle, wilful
-manner, read the thought that was passing in his soul. Even now she seemed
-to read it. She seemed conscious of his pity for her. So little would give
-her happiness, and that little was impossible. His heart was irreparably
-another's. But though Emily's eyes seemed to know all, they seemed to say,
-'What matter? I regret nothing, only let things remain as they are.' And
-then her voice said--
-
-'I think I could sleep a little; happiness has brought me sleep. Don't go
-away. I shall not be asleep long.' She looked at him, and dozed, and then
-fell asleep. Hubert waited till her breathing grew deeper; then he laid the
-hand he held in his by her side, and stole on tiptoe from the room.
-
-The strain of the interview had become too intense; the house was
-unbearable. He went into the air. The November sky was drawing into wintry
-night; the grey clouds darkened, clinging round the long plain,
-overshadowing it, blotting out colour, leaving nothing but the severe green
-of the park, and the yellow whirling of dishevelled woods.
-
-'I must,' he said to himself, 'think no more about it. I shall go mad if I
-do. Nature will find her own solution. God grant that it may be a merciful
-one! I can do nothing.' And to escape from useless consideration, to
-release his overwrought brain, he hastened his steps, extending his walk
-through the farthest woods. As he approached the lodge gate he came upon
-Mrs. Bentley. She stood, her back turned from him, leaning on the gate, her
-thoughts lost in the long darkness of autumnal fields and woods.
-
-'Julia!'
-
-'You have left Emily. How did you leave her?'
-
-'She is fast asleep on the sofa. She fell asleep. Then why should I remain?
-The house was unbearable. She went to sleep, saying she felt very happy.'
-
-'Really! What induced such a change in her? Did you----'
-
-'No; I did not ask her to marry me; but I was able to tell her that I was
-not going to marry you, and that seemed entirely to satisfy her.'
-
-'Did she ask you?'
-
-'Yes. And when I told her I was not, she said that that was all she wanted
-to know--that she would soon get well now. How we human beings thrive in
-each other's unhappiness!'
-
-'Quite true, and we have been reproaching ourselves for our selfishness.'
-
-'Yes, and hers is infinitely greater. She is quite satisfied not to be
-happy herself, so long as she can make sure of our unhappiness. And what is
-so strange is her utter unconsciousness of her own fantastic and hardly
-conceivable selfishness.... It is astonishing!'
-
-'She is very young, and the young are naturally egotistic.'
-
-'Possibly. Still, it is hardly more agreeable to encounter. Come, let's go
-for a walk; and, above all things, let's talk no more about Emily.'
-
-The roads were greasy, and the hedges were torn and worn with incipient
-winter, and when they dipped the town appeared, a reddish-brown mass in the
-blue landscape. Hubert thought of his play and his love; but not
-separately--they seemed to him now as one indissoluble, indivisible thing;
-and he told her that he never would be able to write it without her
-assistance. That she might be of use to him in his work was singularly
-sweet to hear, and the thought reached to the end of her heart, causing her
-to smile sadly, and argue vainly, and him to reply querulously. They walked
-for about a mile; and then, wearied with sad expostulation, the
-conversation fell, and at the end of a long silence Julia said--
-
-'I think we had better turn back.'
-
-The suggestion filled Hubert's heart with rushing pain, and he answered--
-
-'Why should we return? I cannot go back to that girl. Oh, the miserable
-life we are leading!'
-
-'What can we do? We must go back; we cannot live in a tent by the wayside.
-We have no tent to set up.'
-
-'Come to London, and be my wife.'
-
-'No,' she said; 'that is impossible. Let us not speak of it.'
-
-Hubert did not answer; and, turning their faces homeward, they walked some
-way in silence. Suddenly Hubert said--
-
-'No; it is impossible. I cannot return. There is no use. I'm at the end of
-my tether. I cannot.'
-
-She looked at him in alarm.
-
-'Hubert,' she said, 'this is folly! I cannot return without you.'
-
-'You ruin my life; you refuse me the only happiness. I'm more wretched than
-I can tell you!'
-
-'And I! Do you think that I'm not wretched?' She raised her face to his;
-her eyes were full of tears. He caught her in his arms, and kissed her. The
-warm touch of her lips, the scent of her face and hair, banished all but
-desire of her.
-
-'You must come with me, Julia. I shall go mad if you don't. I can care for
-no one but you. All my life is in you now. You know I cannot love that
-girl, and we cannot continue in this wretched life. There is no sense in
-it; it is a voluntary, senseless martyrdom!'
-
-'Hubert, do not tempt me to be disloyal to my friend. It is cruel of you,
-for you know I love you. But no, nothing shall tempt me. How can I? We do
-not know what might happen. The shock might kill her. She might do away
-with herself.'
-
-'You must come with me,' said Hubert, now completely lost in his passion.
-'Nothing will happen. Girls do not do away with themselves; girls do not
-die of broken hearts. Nothing happens in these days. A few more tears will
-be shed, and she will soon become reconciled to what cannot be altered. A
-year or so after, we will marry her to a nice young man, and she will
-settle down a quiet mother of children.'
-
-'Perhaps you are right.'
-
-An empty fly, returning to the town, passed them. The fly-man raised his
-whip.
-
-'Take you to the railway station in ten minutes!'
-
-Hubert spoke quietly; nevertheless there was a strange nervousness in his
-eyes when he said--
-
-'Fate comes to help me; she offers us the means of escape. You will not
-refuse, Julia?'
-
-Her upraised face was full of doubt and pain, and she was perplexed by the
-fly-man's dull eyes, his starved horse, his ramshackle vehicle, the wet
-road, the leaden sky. It was one of those moments when the familiar appears
-strange and grotesque. Then, gathering all her resolution, she said--
-
-'No, no; it is impossible! Come back, come back.'
-
-He caught her arm: quietly and firmly he led her across the road. 'You must
-listen to me.... We are about to take a decisive step. Are you sure
-that----'
-
-'No, no, Hubert, I cannot; let us return home.'
-
-'I go back to Ashwood! If I did, I should commit suicide.'
-
-'Don't speak like that.... Where will you go?'
-
-'I shall travel.... I shall visit Italy and Greece.... I shall live
-abroad.'
-
-'You are not serious?'
-
-'Yes, I am, Julia. That cab may not take both, but it certainly will take
-one of us away from Ashwood, and for ever.'
-
-'Take you to Southwater, sir--take you to the station in ten minutes,' said
-the fly-man, pulling in his horse. A zig-zag fugitive thought passed: why
-did the fly-man speak of taking them to the station? How was it that he
-knew where they wanted to go? They stopped and wondered. The poor horse's
-bones stood out in strange projections, the round-shouldered little fly-man
-sat grinning on his box, showing three long yellow fangs. The vehicle, the
-horse, and the man, his arm raised in questioning gesture, appeared in
-strange silhouette upon the grey clouds, assuming portentous aspect in
-their tremulous and excited imaginations. 'Take you to Southwater in ten
-minutes!' The voice of the fly-man sounded hard, grating, and derisive in
-their ears.
-
-He had stopped in the middle of the road, and they walked slowly past,
-through a great puddle, which drenched their feet.
-
-'Get in, Julia. Shall I open the door?'
-
-'No, no; think of Emily. I cannot, Hubert,--I cannot; it would kill her.'
-
-The conversation paused, and in a long silence they wondered if the fly-man
-had heard. Then they walked several yards listening to the tramp of the
-hoofs, and then they heard the fly-man strike his horse with the whip. The
-animal shuffled into a sort of trot, and as the carriage passed them the
-fly-man again raised his arm and again repeated the same phrase, 'Drive you
-to the station in ten minutes!' The carriage was her temptation, and Julia
-hoped the man would linger no longer. For the promise she had given to
-Emily lay like a red-hot coal upon her heart; its fumes rose to her head,
-and there were times when she thought they would choke her, and she grew so
-sick with the pain of self-denial that she could have thrown herself down
-in the wet grass on the roadside, and laid her face on the cold earth for
-relief. Would nothing happen? What madness! Night was coming on, and still
-they followed the road to Southwater. Rain fell in heavy drops.
-
-'We shall get wet,' she murmured, as if she were answering the fly-man, who
-had said again, 'Drive you to the station in ten minutes!' She hated the
-man for his persistency.
-
-'Say you will come with me!' Hubert whispered; and all the while the rain
-came down heavier.
-
-'No, no, Hubert.... I cannot; I promised Emily that I never would. I am
-going back.'
-
-'Then we must say good-bye. I will not go back.'
-
-'You don't mean it. You don't really intend me to go back to Emily and tell
-her?... She will not believe me; she will think I have sent you away to
-gain my own end. Hubert, you mustn't leave me ... and in all this wet. See
-how it rains! I shall never be able to get home alone.'
-
-'I will drive you on as far as the lodge-gate; farther than the lodge I
-will not go. Nothing in the world shall tempt me to pass it.'
-
-At a sign from Hubert the little fly-man scrambled down from his box. He
-was a little old man, almost hunchbacked, with small mud-coloured eyes and
-a fringe of white beard about his sallow, discoloured face. He was dressed
-in a pale yellow jacket and waistcoat, and they both noticed that his
-crooked little legs were covered with a pair of pepper-and-salt trousers.
-They felt sure he must have overheard a large part of their conversation,
-for as he opened the carriage door he grinned, showing his three yellow
-fangs.... His appearance was not encouraging. Julia wished he were
-different, and then she looked at Hubert. She longed to throw herself into
-his arms and weep. But at that moment the heavens seemed to open, and the
-rain came down like a torrent, thick and fast, splashing all along the road
-in a million splashes.
-
-'Horrible weather, sir; shan't be long a-takin' you to Southwater. What
-part of the town be yer going to--the railway station?'
-
-Julia still hesitated. The rain beat on their faces, and when some chilling
-drops rolled down her neck she instinctively sought shelter in the
-carriage.
-
-'Drive me to the station as fast as you can. Catch the half-past five to
-London, and I'll give you five shillings.'
-
-The leather thong sounded on the starved animal's hide, the crazy vehicle
-rocked from side to side, and the wet country almost disappeared in the
-darkness. Hedges and fields swept past them in faintest outline, here and
-there a blurred mass, which they recognised as a farm building. His arm was
-about her, and she heard him murmur over and over again--
-
-'Dearest Julia, you are what I love best in the world.'
-
-The words thrilled her a little, but all the while she saw Emily's eyes and
-heard her voice.
-
-Hubert, however, was full of happiness--the sweet happiness of the quiet,
-docile creature that has at last obtained what it loves.
-
-
-
-
-XIX
-
-
-Emily awoke shivering; the fire had gone out, the room was in darkness, and
-the house seemed strange and lonely. She rang the bell, and asked the
-servant if he had seen Mr. Price. Mr. Price had gone out late in the
-afternoon, and had not come in. Where was Mrs. Bentley? Mrs. Bentley had
-gone out earlier in the afternoon, and had not come in.
-
-She suspected the truth at once. They had gone to London to be married. The
-servant lighted a candle, made up the fire, and asked if she would wait
-dinner. Emily made no answer, but sat still, her eyes fixed, looking into
-space. The man lingered at the door. At that moment her little dog bounded
-into the room, and, in a paroxysm of delight, jumped on his mistress's lap.
-She took him in her arms and kissed him, and this somewhat reassured the
-alarmed servant, who then thought it was no more than one of Miss Emily's
-queer ways. Dandy licked his mistress's face, and rubbed his rough head
-against her shoulder. He seemed more than usually affectionate that
-evening. Suddenly she caught him up in her arms, and kissed him
-passionately. 'Not even for your sake, dearest Dandy, can I bear with it
-any longer! We are all very selfish, and it is selfish of me to leave you,
-but I cannot help it.' Then a doubt crossed her mind, and she raised her
-head and listened to it. It seemed difficult to believe that he had told
-her a falsehood--cruel, wicked falsehood--he who had been so kind. And
-yet---- Ah! yes, she knew well enough that it was all true; something told
-her so. The lancinating pain of doubt passed away, and she remained
-thinking of the impossibility of bearing any longer with the life.
-
-An hour passed, and the servant came with the news that Mr. Price and Mrs.
-Bentley had gone to London; they had taken the half-past five train. 'Yes,'
-she said, 'I know they have.' Her voice was calm. There was a strange
-hollow ring in it, and the servant wondered. A few minutes after, dinner
-was announced; and to escape observation and comment she went into the
-dining-room, tasted the soup, and took a slice of mutton on her plate. She
-could not eat it. She gave it to Dandy. It was the last time she should
-feed him. How hungry he was! She hoped he would not care to eat it; he
-would not if he knew she was going to leave him.
-
-In the drawing-room he insisted on being nursed; and alone, amid the faded
-furniture, watched over by the old portraits, her pale face fixed and her
-pale hands clasping her beloved dog, she sat thinking, brooding over the
-unhappiness, the incurable unhappiness, of her little life. She was
-absorbed in self, and did not rail against Hubert, or even Julia. Their
-personalities had somehow dropped out of her mind, and merely represented
-forces against which she found herself unable any longer to contend. Nor
-was she surprised at what had happened. There had always been in her some
-prescience of her fate. She and unhappiness had always seemed so
-inseparable, that she had never found it difficult to believe that this
-last misfortune would befall her. She had thought it over, and had decided
-that it would be unendurable to live any longer, and had borne many a
-terrible insomnia so that she might collect sufficient chloral to take her
-out of her misery; and now, as she sat thinking, she remembered that she
-had never, never been happy. Oh! the miserable evenings she used to spend,
-when a child, between her father and mother, who could not agree--why, she
-never understood. But she used to have to listen to her mother addressing
-insulting speeches to her father in a calm, even voice that nothing could
-alter; and, though both were dead and years divided her from that time, the
-memory survived, and she could see it all again--that room, the very paper
-on the wall, and her father being gradually worked up into a frenzy.
-
-When she was left an orphan, Mr. Burnett had adopted her, and she
-remembered the joy of coming to Ashwood. She had thought to find happiness
-there; but there, as at home, fate had gone against her, and she was hardly
-eighteen when Mr. Burnett had asked her to marry him. She had loved that
-old man, but he had not loved her; for when she had refused to marry him he
-had broken all his promises and left her penniless, careless of what might
-become of her. Then she had given her whole heart to Julia, and Julia, too,
-had deceived her. And had she not loved Hubert?--no one would ever know how
-much; she did not know herself,--and had he not lied to her? Oh, it was
-very cruel to deceive a poor little girl in this heartless way! There was
-no heart in the world, that was it--and she was all heart; and her heart
-had been trampled on ever since she could remember. And when they came back
-they would revenge themselves upon her--insult her with their happiness;
-perhaps insist on sending her away.
-
-Dandy drowsed on her lap. The servant brought in the tea, and when he
-returned to the kitchen he said he had never seen any one look so
-ghost-like as Miss Emily. The clock ticked loudly in the silence of the old
-room, the hands moving slowly towards ten. She waited for the hour to
-strike; it was then that she usually went to bed. Her thoughts moved as in
-a nightmare; and paramount in this chaotic mass of sensation was an acute
-sense of the deception that had been practised on her; with the
-consciousness, now firm and unalterable, that it had become impossible for
-her to live. When the clock struck she got up from her chair, and the
-movement seemed to react on her brain; her thoughts unclouded, and she went
-up-stairs thinking clearly of her love of this old house. The old gentleman
-in the red coat, his hand on his sword, looked on her benignly; and the
-lady playing the spinet smiled as sweetly as was her wont. Emily held up
-the candle to the picture of the windmill. She had always loved that
-picture, and the sad thought came that she should never see it again.
-Dandy, who had galloped up-stairs, stood looking through the banisters,
-wagging his tail.
-
-The moment she got into her room she wrote the following note: 'I have
-taken an overdose of chloral. My life was too miserable to be borne any
-longer. I forgive those who have caused my unhappiness, and I hope they
-will forgive me any unhappiness I have caused them.' They were nothing to
-her now; they were beyond her hate, and the only pang she felt was parting
-with her beloved Dandy. There he stood looking at her, standing on the edge
-of the bed, waiting for her to cover him up and put him to sleep in his own
-corner. 'Yes, Dandy, in a moment, dear--have patience.' She looked round
-the little room, and, remembering all that she had suffered there, thought
-that the walls must be saturated with grief, like a sponge.
-
-It was a common thing at that time for her to stand before the glass and
-address such words as these to herself: 'My poor girl, how I pity you, how
-I pity you!' And now, looking at herself very sadly, she said, 'My poor
-girl, I shall never pity you any more!' Having hung up her dress, she
-fetched a chair and took various doses of chloral out of the hollow top of
-her wardrobe, where she had hidden things all her life--sweets, novels,
-fireworks. They more than half-filled the tumbler; and, looking at the
-sticky, white liquid, she thought with repugnance of drinking so much of
-it. But, wanting to make quite sure of death, she resolved to take it all,
-and she undressed quickly. She was very cold when she got into bed. Then a
-thought struck her, and she got out of bed to add a postscript to her
-letter. 'I have only one request to make. I hope Dandy will always be taken
-care of.' Surprised that she had not wrapped him up and told him he was to
-go to sleep, the dog stood on the edge of the bed, watching her so
-earnestly that she wondered if he knew what she was going to do. 'No, you
-don't know, dear--do you? If you did, you wouldn't let me do it; you'd bark
-the house down, I know you would, my own darling.' Clasping him to her
-breast, she smothered him with kisses, then put him away in his corner,
-covering him over for the night.
-
-She felt neither grief nor fear. Through much suffering, thought and
-sensation were, to a great extent, dead in her; and, in a sort of emotive
-numbness, she laid her candlestick in its usual place on the chair by her
-bedside; and, sitting up in bed, her night-dress carefully buttoned,
-holding the tumbler half-filled with chloral, she tried to take a
-dispassionate survey of her life. She thought of what she had endured, and
-what she would have to endure if she did not take it. Then she felt she
-must go, and without hesitation drank off the chloral. She placed the
-tumbler by the candlestick, and lay down, remembering vaguely that a long
-time ago she had decided that suicide was not wrong in itself. The last
-thing she remembered was the clock striking eleven.
-
-For half an hour she slept like stone. Then her eyes opened, and they told
-of sickness now in motion within her. And, strangely enough, through the
-overpowering nausea rising from her stomach to her brain, the thought that
-she was not going to die appeared perfectly clear, and with it a sense of
-disappointment; she would have to begin it all over again. It was with
-great difficulty that she struck a match and lighted a candle. It seemed
-impossible to get up. At last she managed to slip her legs out of bed, and
-found she could stand, and through the various assaults of retching she
-thought of the letter: it must be destroyed; and, leaning in the corner
-against the wall and the wardrobe, she tried to recover herself. A dull,
-deep sleep was pressing on her brain, and she thought she would never be
-able to cross the room to where the letter was. Dandy looked out of his
-rug; she caught sight of his bright eyes.
-
-On cold and shaky feet she attempted to make her way towards the letter;
-but the room heaved up at her, and, fearing she should fall, and knowing if
-she did that she would not be able to regain her feet, she clung to the
-toilette-table. She must destroy that letter: if it were found, they would
-watch her; and, however impossible her life might become, she would not be
-able to escape from it. This consideration gave her strength for a final
-effort. She tore the letter into very small pieces, and then, clinging to a
-chair, strove to grasp the rail of the bed; but the bed rolled worse than
-any ship. Making a supreme effort, she got in; and then, neither dreams nor
-waking thoughts, but oblivion complete. Hours and hours passed, and when
-she opened her eyes her maid stood over the bed, looking at her.
-
-'Oh, miss, you looked so tired and ill that I didn't wake you. You do seem
-poorly, miss. It is nearly two o'clock. Should you like to sleep a little
-longer, or shall I bring you up some breakfast?'
-
-'No, no, no, thank you. I couldn't touch anything. I'm feeling wretched;
-but I'll get up.'
-
-The maid tried to dissuade her; but Emily got out of bed, and allowed
-herself to be dressed. She was very weak--so weak that she could hardly
-stand up at the washstand; and the maid had to sponge her face and neck.
-But when she had drunk a cup of tea and eaten a little piece of toast, she
-said she felt better, and was able to walk into the drawing-room. She
-thought no more of death, nor of her troubles; thought drowned in her; and
-in a passive, torpid state she sat looking into the fire till dinner-time,
-hardly caring to bestow a casual caress on Dandy, who seemed conscious of
-his mistress's neglect, for, in his sly, coaxing way, he sometimes came and
-rubbed himself against her feet. She went into the dining-room, and the
-servant was glad to see that she finished her soup, and, though she hardly
-tasted it, she finished a wing of a chicken, and also the glass of wine
-which the man pressed upon her. Half an hour after, when he brought out the
-tea, he found her sitting on her habitual chair nursing her dog, and
-staring into the fire so drearily that her look frightened him, and he
-hesitated before he gave her the letter which had just come up from the
-town; but it was marked 'Immediate.'
-
-When he left the room she opened it. It was from Mrs. Bentley:--
-
-'Dearest Emily,--I know that Hubert told you that he was not going to marry
-me. He thought he was not, for I had refused to marry him; but a short time
-after we met in the park quite accidentally, and--well, fate took the
-matter out of our hands, and we are to be married to-morrow. Hubert insists
-on going to Italy, and I believe we shall remain there two months. We have
-made arrangements for your aunt to live with you until we come back; and
-when we do come back, I hope all the little unpleasantnesses which have
-marred our friendship for this last month or two will be forgotten. So far
-as I am concerned, nothing shall be left undone to make you happy. Your
-will shall be law at Ashwood so long as I am there. If you would like to
-join us in Italy, you have only to say the word. We shall be delighted to
-have you.'
-
-Emily could read no more. 'Join them in Italy!' She dashed the letter into
-the fire, and an intense hatred of them both pierced her heart and brain.
-It was the kiss of Judas. Oh, those hateful, lying words! To live here with
-her aunt until they came back, to wait here quietly until she returned in
-triumph with him--him who had been all the world to her. Oh no; that was
-not possible. Death, death--escape she must. But how? She had no more
-chloral. Suddenly she thought of the lake. 'Yes, yes; the lake, the lake!'
-And then a keen, swift, passionate longing for death, such as she had not
-felt at all the night before, came upon her. There was the knowledge too
-that by killing herself she would revenge herself on those who had killed
-her. She was just conscious that her suicide would have this effect, but
-hardly a trace of such intention appeared in the letter she wrote; it was
-as melancholy and as brief as the letter she had torn up, and ended, like
-it, with a request that Dandy should be well looked after. She had only
-just directed the envelope when she heard the servant coming to take away
-the tea-things. She concealed the letter; and when his steps died away in
-the corridor and the house-door closed, she knew she could slip out
-unobserved. Instinctively she thought of her hat and jacket, and, without a
-shudder, remembered she would not need them. She sped down the pathway
-through the shadow of the firs.
-
-It was one of those warm nights of winter when a sulphur-coloured sky hangs
-like a blanket behind the wet, dishevelled woods; and, though there was
-neither moon nor star, the night was strangely clear, and the shadow of the
-bridge was distinct in the water. When she approached the brink the swans
-moved slowly away. They reminded her of the cold; but the black obsession
-of death was upon her; and, hastening her steps, she threw herself forward.
-She fell into shallow water and regained her feet, and for a moment it
-seemed uncertain if she would wade to the bank or fling herself into a
-deeper place. Suddenly she sank, the water rising to her shoulders. She was
-lifted off her feet. A faint struggle, a faint cry, and then
-nothing--nothing but the whiteness of the swans moving through the sultry
-night slowly towards the island.
-
-
-
-
-XX
-
-
-Its rich, inanimate air proclaimed the room to be an expensive bedroom in a
-first-class London hotel. Interest in the newly-married couple, who were to
-occupy the room, prompted the servants to see that nothing was forgotten;
-and as they lingered steps were heard in the passage, and Hubert and Julia
-entered. The maid-servants stood aside to let them pass, and one inquired
-if madame wanted anything, so that her eyes might be gratified with a last
-inquisition of the happy pair.
-
-'How wonderful! oh, how wonderful! I don't think I ever saw any one act
-before like that--did you?'
-
-'She certainly had three or four moments that could not be surpassed. Her
-entrance in the sleep-walking scene--what vague horror! what pale
-presentiment! how she filled the stage! nothing seemed to exist but she.'
-
-'And Ford; what did you think of Ford's Macbeth?'
-
-'Very good. Everything he does is good. Talent; but the other has genius.'
-
-'I shall never forget this evening. What an awful tragedy!'
-
-'Perhaps I should have taken you to see something more cheerful; but I
-wanted to see Miss Massey play Lady Macbeth. But let us talk of something
-else. Splendid fire--is it not?'
-
-Hubert threw off his overcoat, the movement attracted Julia's attention,
-and it startled her to see how old he seemed to have grown. She noticed as
-she had not noticed before the grey in his beard and the pathetic weary
-look that haunted his eyes. And she understood in that instant that the
-look his face wore was the look of those who have failed in their vocation.
-
-And at that very moment he was wondering if he really loved her, if his
-marriage were a mistake. The passion he had felt when walking with her on
-the wet country road he felt no longer, only an undefinable sadness and a
-weariness which he could not understand. He looked at his wife, and fearing
-that she divined his thoughts, he kissed her. She returned his kiss coldly
-and he wondered if she loved him. He thought that it was improbable that
-she did. Why should she love him? He had never loved any one. He had never
-inspired love in any one, except perhaps Emily.
-
-'I wonder if you really wished to be married,' she said.
-
-'I always wished to be married,' he replied. 'I hated the Bohemianism I was
-forced to live in. I longed for a home, for a wife.'
-
-'You were very poor once?'
-
-'Yes: I've lived on tenpence and a shilling a day. I've worked in the docks
-as a labourer. I went down there hoping to get a clerkship on board one of
-the Transatlantic steamers. I had had enough of England, and thought of
-seeking fortune elsewhere.'
-
-'I can hardly believe you worked as a labourer in the docks.'
-
-'Yes; I did. I saw some men going to work, and I joined them. I don't think
-I thought much about it at the time. A very little misery rubs all the
-psychology out of us, and we return more easily than one thinks to the
-animal.'
-
-'And then?'
-
-'At the end of a week the work began to tell upon me, and I drifted back in
-search of my manuscript.'
-
-'But you must have been in a dreadful condition; your clothes----'
-
-'Ah! thereby hangs a tale. An actress lived in one of the houses I had been
-lodging in.'
-
-'Oh, tell me about her! This is getting very interesting.'
-
-Then passing his arm round his wife's neck, and with her sweet blonde face
-looking upon him, and the insinuating warmth of the fire about them, he
-told her the story of his failure.
-
-'But,' she said, her voice trembling, 'you would not have committed
-suicide?'
-
-'No man knows beforehand whether he will commit suicide. I can only say
-that every other issue was closed.'
-
-At the end of a long silence Julia said, 'I wish you hadn't spoken about
-suicide. I cannot but think of Emily. If she were to make away with
-herself! The very possibility turns my heart to ice. What should I do--what
-should we do? I ought never to have given way; we were both abominably
-selfish. I can see that poor girl sitting alone in that house grieving her
-heart out.'
-
-'You think that we ought never to have given way!'
-
-'I suppose we ought not. I tried very hard, you know I did.... But do you
-regret?' she said, looking at him suddenly.
-
-'No; I don't regret, but I wish it had happened otherwise.'
-
-'You don't fear anything. Nothing will happen. What can happen?'
-
-'The most terrible things often happen--have happened.'
-
-'Emily may have been fond of me--I think she was; but it was no more than
-the hysterical caprice of a young girl. Besides, people do not die for
-love; and I assure you it will be all right. This is not a time for gloomy
-thoughts.'
-
-'I'll try not to think of her. Well, what were we talking about? I know:
-about the actress who lived in 17 Fitzroy Street. Tell me about her.'
-
-'She was a real good girl. If she hadn't lent me that five shillings, I
-don't know where I should be now.'
-
-'Were you very fond of her?'
-
-'No; there never was anything of that sort between us. We were merely
-friends.'
-
-'And what has become of this actress?'
-
-'You saw her to-night?'
-
-'Was she acting in the piece we saw to-night?'
-
-'It was she who played Lady Macbeth.'
-
-'You are joking.'
-
-'No, I'm not. I always knew she had genius, and they have found it out; but
-I must say they have taken their time about it.'
-
-'How wonderful! she has succeeded!'
-
-'Yes, _she_ has succeeded!'
-
-'And she is really the girl you intended to play Lady Hayward?'
-
-'Yes; and I hope she will play the part one of these days.'
-
-'Of course, she is just the woman for it. What a splendid success she has
-had! All London is talking about her.'
-
-'And I remember when Ford refused to cast her for the adventuress in
-_Divorce_. If he had, there is no doubt she would have carried the piece
-through. Life is but a bundle of chances; she has succeeded, whatever that
-may mean.'
-
-'But you will let her have the part of Lady Hayward?'
-
-'Yes, of course--that is to say, if----'
-
-'Why "if"?'
-
-'My thoughts are with you, dear; literature seems to have passed out of
-sight.'
-
-'But you must not sacrifice your talent in worship of me. I shall not allow
-you. For my sake, if not for hers, you must finish that play. I want you to
-be famous. I should be for ever miserable if my love proved a upas-tree.'
-
-'A upas-tree! It will be you who will help me; it will be your presence
-that will help me to write my play. I was always vaguely conscious that you
-were a necessary element in my life; but I did not wake up to any knowledge
-of it until that day--do you remember?--when you came into my study to ask
-me what fish I'd like for dinner, and I begged of you to allow me to read
-to you that second act. It is that second act that stops me.'
-
-'I thought you had written the second act to your satisfaction. You said
-that after the talk we had that afternoon you wrote for three hours without
-stopping, and that you had never done better work.'
-
-'Yes, I wrote a great deal; but on reading it over I found that--I don't
-mean to say that none of it will stand; some still seems to me to be all
-right, but a great deal will require alteration.'
-
-The conversation fell. At the end of a long silence Hubert said--
-
-'What are you thinking of, dearest?'
-
-'I was thinking that supposing you were mistaken--if I failed to help you
-in your work.'
-
-'And I never succeeded in writing my play?'
-
-'No; I don't mean that. Of course you will write your play; all you have to
-do is to be less critical.'
-
-'Yes, I know--I have heard that before; but, unfortunately, we cannot
-change ourselves. I'll either carry my play through completely, realise my
-ideal, or----'
-
-'Remain for ever unsatisfied?'
-
-'Whether I write it or no, I shall be happy in your love.'
-
-'Yes, yes; let us be happy.'
-
-They looked at each other. He did not speak, but his thought said--
-
-'There is no happiness on earth for him who has not accomplished his task.'
-
-'Shall we be happy? I wonder. We have both suffered,' she said, 'we are
-both tired of suffering, and it is only right that we should be happy.'
-
-'Yes, we shall be happy, I will be happy. It shall be my pleasure to attend
-to you, to give you all your desire. But you said just now that you had
-suffered. I have told you my past. Tell me yours. I know nothing except
-that you were unhappily married.'
-
-'There is little else to know; a woman's life is not adventurous, like a
-man's. I have not known the excitement of "first nights," nor the striving
-and the craving for an artistic ideal. My life has been essentially a
-woman's life,--suppression of self and monotonous duty, varied by
-heart-breaking misfortune. I married when I was very young; before I had
-even begun to think about life I found---- But why distress these hours
-with painful memories?'
-
-'It is pleasant to look back on the troubles we have passed through.'
-
-'Well, I learnt in one year the meaning of three terrible words--poverty,
-neglect, and cruelty. In the second year of my marriage my husband died of
-drink, and I was left a widow at twenty, entirely penniless. I went to live
-with my sister, and she was so poor that I had to support myself by giving
-music-lessons. You think you know the meaning of poverty: you may; but you
-do not know what a young woman who wants to earn her bread honestly has to
-put up with, trudging through wet and cold, mile after mile, to give a
-lesson, paid for at the rate of one-and-sixpence or two shillings an hour.'
-
-Julia took her eyes from her husband's face, and looked dreamily into the
-fire. Then, raising her face from the flame, she looked around with the air
-of one seeking for some topic of conversation. At that moment she caught
-sight of the corner of a letter lying on the mantelpiece. Reaching forth
-her hand, she took it. It was addressed to her husband.
-
-'Here is a letter for you, Hubert.... Why, it comes from Ashwood. Yes, and
-it is in the hand-writing of one of the servants. Oh, it is Black's
-writing! It may be about Emily. Something may have happened to her. Open it
-quickly.'
-
-'That is not probable. Nothing can have happened to her.'
-
-'Look and see. Be quick!'
-
-Hubert opened the letter, and he had not read three lines when Julia's face
-caught expression from his, which had become overcast.
-
-'It is bad news, I know. Something has happened. What is it? Don't keep me
-waiting. The suspense is worse than the truth.'
-
-'It is very awful, Julia. Don't give way.'
-
-'Tell me what it is. Is she dead?
-
-'Yes; she is dead.' Julia got up from her husband's knees and stood by the
-mantelpiece, leaning upon it. 'It is more than mere death.'
-
-'What do you mean? She killed herself--is that it?'
-
-'Yes; she drowned herself the night before last in the lake.'
-
-'Oh, it is too horrible! Then we have murdered her. Our unpardonable
-selfishness! I cannot bear it!' Her eyes closed and her lips trembled.
-Hubert caught her in his arms, laid her on the chair, and, fetching some
-water in a tumbler, sprinkled her face; then he held it to her lips; she
-drank a little, and revived. 'I'm not going to faint. Tell me--tell me when
-the unfortunate child----'
-
-'They don't know exactly. She was in the drawing-room at tea-time, and the
-drawing-room was empty when Black went round three-quarters of an hour
-after to lock up. He thought she had gone to her room. It was the gardener
-who brought in the news in the morning about nine.'
-
-'Oh, good God!'
-
-'Black says he noticed that she looked very depressed the day before, but
-he thought she was looking better when he brought in the tea.'
-
-'It was then she got my letter. Does Black say anything about giving her a
-letter?'
-
-'Yes, that is to say----'
-
-'I knew it! I knew it!' said Julia; and her eyes were wild with grief, and
-she rocked herself to and fro. 'It was that letter that drove her to it. It
-was most ill-advised. I told you so. You should have written. She would
-have borne the news better had it come from you. My instinct told me so,
-but I let myself be persuaded. I told you how it would happen. I told you.
-You can't say I didn't. Oh! why did you persuade me--why--why--why?'
-
-'Julia dear, we are not responsible. We were in nowise bound to sacrifice
-our happiness to her----'
-
-'Don't say a word! I say we were bound. Life can never be the same to me
-again.'
-
-Hubert did not answer. Nothing he could say would be of the slightest
-avail, and he feared to say anything that might draw from her expressions
-which she would afterwards regret. He had never seen her moved like this,
-nor did he believe her capable of such agitation, and the contrast of her
-present with her usual demeanour made it the more impressive.
-
-'Oh,' she said, leaning forward and looking at him fixedly, 'take this
-nightmare off my brain, or I shall go mad! It isn't true; it cannot be
-true. But--oh! yes, it's true enough.'
-
-'Like you, Julia, I am overwhelmed; but we can do nothing.'
-
-'Do nothing!' she cried; 'do nothing! We can do nothing but pray for
-her--we who sacrificed her.' And she slipped on her knees and burst into a
-passionate fit of weeping.
-
-'The best thing that could have happened,' thought Hubert; and his thought
-said, clearly and precisely, 'Yes; it is awful, shocking, cruel beyond
-measure!'
-
-The fire was sinking, and he built it up quietly, ashamed of this proof of
-his regard for physical comfort, and hoping it would pass unnoticed. His
-pain expressed itself less vehemently than Julia's; but for all that his
-mind ached. He remembered how he had taken everything from her--fortune,
-happiness, and now life itself. It was an appalling tragedy--one of those
-senseless cruelties which we find nature constantly inventing. A thought
-revealed an unexpected analogy between him and his victim. In both lives
-there had been a supreme desire, and both had failed. 'Hers was the better
-part,' he said bitterly. 'Those whose souls are burdened with desire that
-may not be gratified had better fling the load aside. They are fools who
-carry it on to the end.... If it were not for Julia----'
-
-Then he sought to determine what were his exact feelings. He knew he was
-infinitely sorry for poor Emily; but he could not stir himself into a
-paroxysm of grief, and, ashamed of his inability to express his feelings,
-he looked at Julia, who still wept.
-
-'No doubt,' he thought, 'women have keener feelings than we have.'
-
-At that moment Julia got up from her knees. She had brushed away her tears.
-Her face was shaken with grief.
-
-'My heart is breaking,' she said. 'This is too cruel--too cruel! And on my
-wedding night.'
-
-Their eyes met; and, divining each other's thought, each felt ashamed, and
-Julia said--
-
-'Oh, what am I saying? This dreadful selfishness, from which we cannot
-escape, that is with us even in such a moment as this! That poor child gone
-to her death, and yet amid it all we must think of ourselves.'
-
-'My dear Julia, we cannot escape from our human nature; but, for all that,
-our grief is sincere. We can do nothing. Do not grieve like that.'
-
-'And why not? She was my best friend. How have I repaid her? Alas! as woman
-always repays woman for kindness done. The old story. I cannot forgive
-myself. No, no! do not kiss me! I cannot bear it. Leave me. I can see
-nothing but Emily's reproachful face.' She covered her face in her hands
-and sobbed again.
-
-The same scenes repeated themselves over and over again. The same fits of
-passionate grief; the same moment of calm, when words impregnated with self
-dropped from their lips. The same nervous sense that something of the dead
-girl stood between them. And still they sat by the fire, weary with sorrow,
-recrimination, long regret, and pain. They could grieve no more; and before
-dawn sleep pressed upon their eyelids, and at the end of a long silence he
-dozed--a pale, transparent sleep, through which the realities of life
-appeared almost as plainly as before. Suddenly he awoke, and he shivered in
-the chill room. The fire was sinking; dawn divided the window-curtains. He
-looked at his wife. She seemed to him very beautiful as she slept, her face
-turned a little on one side, and again he asked himself if he loved her.
-Then, going to the window, he drew the curtains softly, so as not to awaken
-her; and as he stood watching a thin discoloured day breaking over the
-roofs, it again seemed to him that Emily's suicide was the better part.
-'Those who do not perform their task in life are never happy.' The words
-drilled themselves into his brain with relentless insistency. He felt a
-terrible emptiness within him which he could not fill. He looked at his
-wife and quailed a little at the thought that had suddenly come upon him.
-She was something like himself--that was why he had married her. We are
-attracted by what is like ourselves. Emily's passion might have stirred
-him. Now he would have to settle down to live with Julia, and their similar
-natures would grow more and more like one another. Then, turning on his
-thoughts, he dismissed them. They were the morbid feverish fancies of an
-exceptional, of a terrible night. He opened the window quietly so as not to
-awaken his wife. And in the melancholy greyness of the dawn he looked down
-into the street and wondered what the end would be.
-
-He did not think that he would live long. Disappointed men--those who have
-failed in their ambition--do not live to make old bones. There were men
-like him in every profession--the arts are crowded with them. He had met
-barristers and soldiers and clergy-men, just like himself. One hears of
-their deaths--failure of the heart's action, paralysis of the brain, a
-hundred other medical causes--but the real cause is, lack of appreciation.
-
-He would hang on for another few years, no doubt; during that time he must
-try to make his wife happy. His duty was now to be a good husband, at all
-events, there was that.
-
-His wife lay asleep in the arm-chair, and fearing she might catch cold, he
-came into the room closing the window very gently behind him.
-
-THE END
-
-Printed by T. and A. Constable, printers to Her Majesty at the Edinburgh
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-example an eBook of filename 10234 would be found at:
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-*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 11303 ***
-
-[Illustration: "She slipped on her knees, and burst into a passionate fit
-of weeping."]
-
-Vain Fortune
-
-A Novel
-
-By
-
-George Moore
-
-_With Five Illustrations By__Maurice Greiffenhagen_
-
-New Edition
-
-Completely Revised
-
-London: Walter Scott, Ltd. Paternoster Square
-
-1895
-
-Edinburgh: T. and A. Constable, Printers to Her Majesty
-
-
-
-
-Prefatory Note
-
-
-I hope it will not seem presumptuous to ask my critics to treat this new
-edition of _Vain Fortune_ as a new book: for it is a new book. The first
-edition was kindly noticed, but it attracted little attention, and very
-rightly, for the story as told therein was thin and insipid; and when
-Messrs. Scribner proposed to print the book in America, I stipulated that I
-should be allowed to rewrite it. They consented, and I began the story with
-Emily Watson, making her the principal character instead of Hubert Price.
-Some months after I received a letter from Madam Couperus, offering to
-translate the English edition into Dutch. I sent her the American edition,
-and asked her which she would prefer to translate from. Madam Couperus
-replied that many things in the English edition, which she would like to
-retain, had been omitted from the American edition, that the hundred or
-more pages which I had written for the American edition seemed to her
-equally worthy of retention.
-
-She pointed out that, without the alteration of a sentence, the two
-versions could be combined. The idea had not occurred to me; I saw,
-however, that what she proposed was not only feasible but advantageous. I
-wrote, therefore, giving her the required permission, and thanking her for
-a suggestion which I should avail myself of when the time came for a new
-English edition.
-
-The union of the texts was no doubt accomplished by Madam Couperus, without
-the alteration of a sentence; but no such accomplished editing is possible
-to me; I am a victim to the disease of rewriting, and the inclusion of the
-hundred or more pages of new matter written for the American edition led me
-into a third revision of the story. But no more than in the second has the
-skeleton, or the attitude of the skeleton been altered in this third
-version, only flesh and muscle have been added, and, I think, a little
-life. _Vain Fortune_, even in its present form, is probably not my best
-book, but it certainly is far from being my worst. But my opinion regarding
-my own work is of no value; I do not write this Prefatory Note to express
-it, but to ask my critics and my readers to forget the original _Vain
-Fortune_, and to read this new book as if it were issued under another
-title.
-
-G.M.
-
-
-
-
-I
-
-
-The lamp had not been wiped, and the room smelt slightly of paraffin. The
-old window-curtains, whose harsh green age had not softened, were drawn.
-The mahogany sideboard, the threadbare carpet, the small horsehair sofa,
-the gilt mirror, standing on a white marble chimney-piece, said clearly,
-'Furnished apartments in a house built about a hundred years ago.' There
-were piles of newspapers, there were books on the mahogany sideboard and on
-the horsehair sofa, and on the table there were various manuscripts,--_The
-Gipsy_, Act I.; _The Gipsy_, Act III., Scenes iii. and iv.
-
-A sheet of foolscap paper, and upon it a long slender hand. The hand traced
-a few lines of fine, beautiful caligraphy, then it paused, correcting with
-extreme care what was already written, and in a hesitating, minute way,
-telling of a brain that delighted in the correction rather than in the
-creation of form.
-
-The shirt-cuff was frayed and dirty. The coat was thin and shiny. A
-half-length figure of a man drew out of the massed shadows between the
-window and sideboard. The red beard caught the light, and the wavy brown
-hair brightened. Then a look of weariness, of distress, passed over the
-face, and the man laid down the pen, and, taking some tobacco from a paper,
-rolled a cigarette. Rising, and leaning forward, he lighted it over the
-lamp. He was a man of about thirty-six feet, broad-shouldered, well-built,
-healthy, almost handsome.
-
-The time he spent in dreaming his play amounted to six times, if not ten
-times, as much as he devoted to trying to write it; and he now lit
-cigarette after cigarette, abandoning himself to every meditation,--the
-unpleasantness of life in lodgings, the charm of foreign travel, the beauty
-of the south, what he would do if his play succeeded. He plunged into
-calculation of the time it would take him to finish it if he were to sit at
-home all day, working from seven to ten hours every day. If he could but
-make up his mind concerning the beginning and the middle of the third act,
-and about the end, too,--the solution,--he felt sure that, with steady
-work, the play could be completed in a fortnight. In such reverie and such
-consideration he lay immersed, oblivious of the present moment, and did not
-stir from his chair until the postman shook the frail walls with a violent
-double knock. He hoped for a letter, for a newspaper--either would prove a
-welcome distraction. The servant's footsteps on the stairs told him the
-post had brought him something. His heart sank at the thought that it was
-probably only a bill, and he glanced at all the bills lying one above
-another on the table.
-
-It was not a bill, nor yet an advertisement, but a copy of a weekly review.
-He tore it open. An article about himself!
-
-After referring to the deplorable condition of the modern stage, the writer
-pointed out how dramatic writing has of late years come to be practised
-entirely by men who have failed in all other branches of literature. Then
-he drew attention to the fact that signs of weariness and dissatisfaction
-with the old stale stories, the familiar tricks in bringing about 'striking
-situations,' were noticeable, not only in the newspaper criticisms of new
-plays, but also among the better portion of the audience. He admitted,
-however, that hitherto the attempts made by younger writers in the
-direction of new subject-matter and new treatment had met with little
-success. But this, he held, was not a reason for discouragement. Did those
-who believed in the old formulas imagine that the new formula would be
-discovered straight away, without failures preliminary? Besides, these
-attempts were not utterly despicable; at least one play written on the new
-lines had met with some measure of success, and that play was Mr. Hubert
-Price's _Divorce_.
-
-'Yes, the fellow is right. The public is ready for a good play: it wasn't
-when _Divorce_ was given. I must finish _The Gipsy_. There are good things
-in it; that I know. But I wish I could get that third act right. The public
-will accept a masterpiece, but it will not accept an attempt to write a
-masterpiece. But this time there'll be no falling off in the last acts. The
-scene between the gipsy lover and the young lord will fetch 'em.' Taking up
-the review, Hubert glanced over the article a second time. 'How anxious the
-fellows are for me to achieve a success! How they believe in me! They
-desire it more than I do. They believe in me more than I do in myself. They
-want to applaud me. They are hungry for the masterpiece.'
-
-At that moment his eye was caught by some letters written on blue paper.
-His face resumed a wearied and hunted expression. 'There's no doubt about
-it, money I must get somehow. I am running it altogether too fine. There
-isn't twenty pounds between me and the deep sea.'
-
- * * * * *
-
-He was the son of the Rev. James Price, a Shropshire clergyman. The family
-was of Welsh extraction, but in Hubert none of the physical characteristics
-of the Celt appeared. He might have been selected as a typical Anglo-Saxon.
-The face was long and pale, and he wore a short reddish beard; the eyes
-were light blue, verging on grey, and they seemed to speak a quiet,
-steadfast soul. Hubert had always been his mother's favourite, and the
-scorn of his elder brothers, two rough boys, addicted in early youth to
-robbing orchards, and later on to gambling and drinking. The elder, after
-having broken his father's heart with debts and disgraceful living, had
-gone out to the Cape. News of his death came to the Rectory soon after; but
-James's death did not turn Henry from his evil courses, and one day his
-father and mother had to go to London on his account, and they brought him
-back a hopeless invalid. Hubert was twelve years of age when he followed
-his brother to the grave.
-
-It was at his brother's funeral that Hubert met for the first time his
-uncle, Mr. Burnett. Mr. Burnett had spent the greater part of his life in
-New Zealand, where he had made a large fortune by sheep-farming and
-investments in land. He had seemed to be greatly taken with his nephew, and
-for many years it was understood that he would leave him the greater part,
-if not the whole, of his fortune. But Mr. Burnett had come under the
-influence of some poor relations, some distant cousins, the Watsons, and
-had eventually decided to adopt their daughter Emily and leave her his
-fortune. He did not dare intimate his change of mind to his sister; but the
-news having reached Mrs. Price in various rumours, she wrote to her brother
-asking him to confirm or deny these rumours; and when he admitted their
-truth, Mrs. Price never spoke to him again. She was a determined woman, and
-the remembrance of the wrong done to her son never left her.
-
-While the other children had been a torment and disgrace, Hubert had been
-to his parents a consolation and a blessing. They had feared that he too
-might turn to betting and drink, but he had never shown sign of low tastes.
-He played no games, nor did he care for terriers or horses; but for books
-and drawing, and long country walks. Immediately on hearing of his
-disinheritance he had spoken at once of entering a profession; and for many
-months this was the subject of consideration in the Rectory. Hubert joined
-in these discussions willingly, but he could not bring himself to accept
-the army or the bar. It was indeed only necessary to look at him to see
-that neither soldier's tunic nor lawyer's wig was intended for him; and it
-was nearly as clear that those earnest eyes, so intelligent and yet so
-undetermined in their gaze, were not those of a doctor.
-
-But if his eyes failed to predict his future, his hands told the story of
-his life distinctly enough--those long, white, languid hands, what could
-they mean but art? And very soon Hubert began to draw, evincing some
-natural aptitude. Then an artist came into the neighbourhood, the two
-became friends, and went together on a long sketching tour. Life in the
-open air, the shade of the hedge, the glare of the highway, the meditation
-of the field, the languor of the river-side, the contemplation of wooded
-horizons, was what Hubert's pastoral nature was most fitted to enjoy; and,
-for the sake of the life it afforded him, he pursued the calling of a
-landscape painter long after he had begun to feel his desire turning in
-another direction. When the landscape on the canvas seemed hopelessly
-inadequate, he laid aside the brush for the pencil, and strove to interpret
-the summer fields in verse. From verse he drifted into the article and the
-short story, and from the story into the play. And it was in this last form
-that he felt himself strongest, and various were the dramas and comedies
-that he dreamed from year's end to year's end.
-
-While he was in the midst of his period of verse-writing his mother died,
-and in the following year, just as he was working at his stories, he
-received a telegram calling him to attend his father's death-bed. When the
-old man was laid in the shadow of the weather-beaten village church, Hubert
-gathered all his belongings and bade farewell for ever to the Shropshire
-rectory.
-
-In London Hubert made few friends. There were some two or three men with
-whom he was frequently seen--quiet folk like himself, whose enjoyment
-consisted in smoking a tranquil pipe in the evening, or going for long
-walks in the country. He was one of those men whose indefiniteness provokes
-curiosity, and his friends noticed and wondered why it was that he was so
-frequently the theme of their conversation. His simple, unaffected manners
-were full of suggestion, and in his writings there was always an
-indefinable rainbow-like promise of ultimate achievement. So, long before
-he had succeeded in writing a play, detached scenes and occasional verses
-led his friends into gradual belief that he was one from whom big things
-might be expected. And when the one-act play which they had all so heartily
-approved of was produced, and every newspaper praised it for its literary
-quality, the friends took pride in this public vindication of their
-opinion. After the production of his play people came to see the new
-author, and every Saturday evening some fifteen or twenty men used to
-assemble in Hubert's lodgings to drink whisky, smoke cigars, and talk
-drama. Encouraged by his success, Hubert wrote _Divorce_. He worked
-unceasingly upon it for more than a year, and when he had written the final
-scene, he was breaking into his last hundred pounds. The play was refused
-twice, and then accepted by a theatrical speculator, to whom it seemed to
-afford opportunity for the exhibition of the talents of a lady he was
-interested in.
-
-The success of the play was brief. But before it was withdrawn, Hubert had
-sold the American rights for a handsome sum, and within the next two years
-he had completed a second play, which he called _An Ebbing Tide_. Some of
-the critics argued that it contained scenes as fine as any in _Divorce_,
-but it was admitted on all sides that the interest withered in the later
-acts. But the failure of the play did not shake the established belief in
-Hubert's genius; it merely concentrated the admiration of those interested
-in the new art upon _Divorce_, the partial failure of which was now
-attributed to the acting. If it had only been played at the Haymarket or
-the Lyceum, it could not have failed.
-
-The next three years Hubert wasted in various aestheticisms. He explained
-the difference between the romantic and realistic methods in the reviews;
-he played with a poetic drama to be called _The King of the Beggars_, and
-it was not until the close of the third year that he settled down to
-definite work. Then all his energies were concentrated on a new play--_The
-Gipsy_. A young woman of Bohemian origin is suddenly taken with the
-nostalgia of the tent, and leaves her husband and her home to wander with
-those of her race. He had read portions of this play to his friends, who at
-last succeeded in driving Montague Ford, the popular actor-manager, to
-Hubert's door; and after hearing some few scenes he had offered a couple of
-hundred pounds in advance of fees for the completed manuscript. 'But when
-can I have the manuscript?' said Ford, as he was about to leave. 'As soon
-as I can finish it,' Hubert replied, looking at him wistfully out of pale
-blue-grey eyes. 'I could finish it in a month, if I could count on not
-being worried by duns or disturbed by friends during that time.'
-
-Ford looked at Hubert questioningly; then he said 'I have always noticed
-that when a fellow wants to finish a play, the only way to do it is to go
-away to the country and leave no address.'
-
-But the country was always so full of pleasure for him, that he doubted his
-power to remain indoors with the temptation of fields and rivers before his
-eyes, and he thought that to escape from dunning creditors it would be
-sufficient to change his address. So he left Norfolk Street for the more
-remote quarter of Fitzroy Street, where he took a couple of rooms on the
-second floor. One of his fellow-lodgers, he soon found, was Rose Massey, an
-actress engaged for the performance of small parts at the Queen's Theatre.
-The first time he spoke to her was on the doorstep. She had forgotten her
-latch-key, and he said, 'Will you allow me to let you in?' She stepped
-aside, but did not answer him. Hubert thought her rude, but her strange
-eyes and absent-minded manner had piqued his curiosity, and, having nothing
-to do that night, he went to the theatre to see her act. She was playing a
-very small part, and one that was evidently unsuited to her--a part that
-was in contradiction to her nature; but there was something behind the
-outer envelope which led him to believe she had real talent, and would make
-a name for herself when she was given a part that would allow her to reveal
-what was in her.
-
-In the meantime, Rose had been told that the gentleman she had snubbed in
-the passage was Mr. Hubert Price, the author of _Divorce_.
-
-'Oh, it was very silly of me,' she said to Annie. 'If I had only known!'
-
-'Lor', he don't mind; he'll be glad enough to speak to you when you meets
-him again.'
-
-And when they met again on the stairs, Rose nodded familiarly, and Hubert
-said--
-
-'I went to the Queen's the other night.'
-
-'Did you like the piece?'
-
-'I did not care about the piece; but when you get a wild, passionate part
-to play, you'll make a hit. The sentimental parts they give you don't suit
-you.'
-
-A sudden light came into the languid face. 'Yes, I shall do something if I
-can get a part like that.'
-
-Hubert told her that he was writing a play containing just such a part.
-
-Her eyes brightened again. 'Will you read me the play?' she said, fixing
-her dark, dreamy eyes on him.
-
-'I shall be very glad.... Do you think it won't bore you?' And his wistful
-grey eyes were full of interrogation.
-
-'No, I'm sure it won't.'
-
-And a few days after she sent Annie with a note, reminding him of his
-promise to read her what he had written. As she had only a bedroom, the
-reading had to take place in his sitting-room. He read her the first and
-second acts. She was all enthusiasm, and begged hard to be allowed to study
-the part--just to see what she could do with it--just to let him see that
-he was not mistaken in her. Her interest in his work captivated him, and he
-couldn't refuse to lend her the manuscript.
-
-
-
-
-II
-
-
-Rose often came to see Hubert in his rooms. Her manner was disappointing,
-and he thought he must be mistaken in his first judgment of her talents.
-But one afternoon she gave him a recitation of the sleep-walking scene in
-_Macbeth_. It was strange to see this little dark-complexioned, dark-eyed
-girl, the merest handful of flesh and bone, divest herself at will of her
-personality, and assume the tragic horror of Lady Macbeth, or the
-passionate rapture of Juliet detaining her husband-lover on the balcony of
-her chamber. Hubert watched in wonderment this girl, so weak and languid in
-her own nature, awaking only to life when she assumed the personality of
-another. There she lay, her wispy form stretched in his arm-chair, her
-great dark eyes fixed, her mind at rest, sunk in some inscrutable dream.
-Her thin hand lay on the arm of the chair: when she woke from her day-dream
-she burst into irresponsible laughter, or questioned him with petulant
-curiosity. He looked again: her dark curling hair hung on her swarthy neck,
-and she was somewhat untidily dressed in blue linen.
-
-'Were you ever in love?' she said suddenly. 'I don't suppose you could be;
-you are too occupied with your play. I don't know, though; you might be in
-love, but I don't think that many women would be in love with you.... You
-are too good a man, and women don't like good men.'
-
-Hubert laughed, and without a trace of offended vanity in his voice he
-said, 'I don't profess to be much of a lady-killer.'
-
-'You don't know what I mean,' she said, looking at him fixedly, a maze of
-half-childish, half-artistic curiosity in her handsome eyes.
-
-Perplexed in his shy, straightford nature, Hubert inquired if she took
-sugar in her tea. She said she did; stretched her feet to the fire, and
-lapsed into dream. She was one of the enigmas of Stageland. She supported
-herself, and went about by herself, looking a poor, lost little thing. She
-spoke with considerable freedom of language on all subjects, but no one had
-been able to fix a lover upon her.
-
-'What a part Lady Hayward is! But tell me,--I don't quite catch your
-meaning in the second act. Is this it?' and starting to her feet, she
-became in a moment another being. With a gesture, a look, an intonation,
-she was the woman of the play,--a woman taken by an instinct, long
-submerged, but which has floated to the surface, and is beginning to
-command her actions. In another moment she had slipped back into her weary
-lymphatic nature, at once prematurely old and extravagantly childish. She
-could not talk of indifferent things; and having asked some strange
-questions, and laughed loudly, she wished Hubert 'Good-afternoon' in her
-curious, irresponsible fashion, taking her leave abruptly.
-
-The next two days Hubert devoted entirely to his play. There were things in
-it which he knew were good, but it was incomplete. Montague Ford would not
-produce it in its present form. He must put his shoulder to the wheel and
-get it right; one more push, that was all that was wanted. And he could be
-heard walking to and fro, up and down, along and across his tiny
-sitting-room, stopping suddenly to take a note of an idea that had occurred
-to him.
-
-One day he went to Hampstead Heath. A long walk, he thought, would clear
-his mind, and he returned home thinking of his play. The sunset still
-glittering in the skies; the bare trees were beautifully distinct on the
-blue background of the suburban street, and at the end of the long
-perspective, a 'bus and a hansom could be seen coming towards him. As they
-grew larger, his thoughts defined themselves, and the distressing problem
-of his fourth act seemed to solve itself. That very evening he would sketch
-out a new dramatic movement around which all the other movements of the act
-would cluster. But at the corner of Fitzroy Square, within a few yards of
-No. 17, he was accosted by a shabbily-dressed man, who inquired if he were
-Mr. Price. On being answered in the affirmative, the shabbily-dressed man
-said, 'Then I have something for ye; I have been a-watching for ye for the
-last three days, but ye didn't come out; missed yer this morning: 'ere it
-is;' and he thrust a folded paper into Hubert's hand.
-
-'What is this?'
-
-'Don't yer know?' he said with a grin; 'Messrs. Tomkins & Co., Tailors,
-writ--twenty-two pound odd.'
-
-Hubert made no answer; he put the paper in his pocket, opened the door
-quietly, stole up to his room, and sat down to think. The first thing to do
-was to examine into his finances. It was alarming to find that he was
-breaking into his last five-pound note. True that he was close on the end
-of his play, and when it was finished he would be able to draw on Ford. But
-a summons to appear in the county court could not fail to do him immense
-injury. He had heard of avoiding service, but he knew little of the law,
-and wondered what power the service of the writ gave his creditor over him.
-His instinct was to escape--hide himself where they would not be able to
-find him, and so obtain time to finish his play. But he owed his landlady
-money, and his departure would have to be clandestine. As he reflected on
-how many necessaries he might carry away in a newspaper, he began to feel
-strangely like a criminal, and while rolling up a couple of shirts, a few
-pairs of socks, and some collars, he paused, his hands resting on the
-parcel. He did not seem to know himself, and it was difficult to believe
-that he really intended to leave the house in this disreputable fashion.
-Mechanically he continued to add to his parcel, thinking all the while that
-he must go, otherwise his play would never be written.
-
-He had been working very well for the last few days, and now he saw his way
-quite clearly; the inspiration he had been so long waiting for had come at
-last, and he felt sure of his fourth act. At the same time he wished to
-conduct himself honestly, even in this distressing situation. Should he
-tell his landlady the truth? But the desire to realise his idea was
-intolerable, and, yielding as if before an irresistible force, he tied the
-parcel and prepared to go. At that moment he remembered that he must leave
-a note for his landlady, and he was more than ever surprised at the
-naturalness with which lying phrases came into his head. But when it came
-to committing them to paper, he found he could not tell an absolute lie,
-and he wrote a simple little note to the effect that he had been called
-away on urgent business, and hoped to return in about a week.
-
-He descended the stairs softly. Mrs. Wilson's sitting-room opened on to the
-passage; she might step out at any moment, and intercept his exit. He had
-nearly reached the last flight when he remembered that he had forgotten his
-manuscripts. His flesh turned cold, his heart stood still. There was
-nothing for it but to ascend those creaking stairs again. His already
-heavily encumbered pockets could not be persuaded to receive more than a
-small portion of the manuscripts. He gathered them in his hand, and
-prepared to redescend the perilous stairs. He walked as lightly as
-possible, dreading that every creak would bring Mrs. Wilson from her
-parlour. A few more steps, and he would be in the passage. A smell of dust,
-sounds of children crying, children talking in the kitchen! A few more
-steps, and, with his eyes on the parlour door, Hubert had reached the rug
-at the foot of the stairs. He hastened along, the passage. Mrs. Wilson was
-a moment too late. His hand was on the street-door when she appeared at the
-door of her parlour.
-
-'Mr. Price, I want to speak to you before you go out. There has----'
-
-'I can't wait--running to catch a train. You'll find a letter on my table.
-It will explain.'
-
-Hubert slipped out, closed the door, and ran down the street, and it was
-not until he had put two or three streets between him and Fitzroy Street
-that he relaxed his pace, and could look behind him without dreading to
-feel the hand of the 'writter' upon his shoulder.
-
-
-
-
-III
-
-
-Then he wandered, not knowing where he was going, still in the sensation of
-his escape, a little amused, and yet with a shadow of fear upon his soul,
-for he grew more and more conscious of the fact that he was homeless, if
-not quite penniless. Suddenly he stopped walking. Night was thickening in
-the street, and he had to decide where he would sleep. He could not afford
-to pay more than five or six shillings a week for a room, and he thought of
-Holloway, as being a neighbourhood where creditors would not be able to
-find him. So he retraced his steps, and, tired and footsore, entered the
-Tottenham Court Road by the Oxford Street end.
-
-There the omnibuses stopped. A conductor shouted for fares, with the light
-of the public-house lamps on his open mouth. There was smell of mud, of
-damp clothes, of bad tobacco, and where the lights of the costermongers'
-barrows broke across the footway the picture was of a group of three
-coarse, loud-voiced girls, followed by boys. There were fish shops, cheap
-Italian restaurants, and the long lines of low houses vanished in crapulent
-night. The characteristics of the Tottenham Court Road impressed themselves
-on Hubert's mind, and he thought how he would have to bear for at least
-three weeks with all the grime of its poverty. It would take about that
-time to finish his play, and the neighbourhood would suit his purpose
-excellently well. So long as he did not pass beyond it he ran little risk
-of discovery, and to secure himself against friends and foes he penetrated
-farther northward, not stopping till he reached the confines of Holloway.
-
-Then a little dim street caught his eye, and he knocked at the door of the
-first house exhibiting a card in the parlour window. But they did not let
-their bedroom under seven shillings, and this seemed to Hubert to be an
-extravagant price. He tried farther on, and at last found a clean room for
-six shillings. Having no luggage, he paid a week's rent in advance, and the
-landlady promised to get him a small table, on which he could write, a
-small table that would fit in somewhere near the window. She asked him when
-he would like to be called, and put the candlestick on the chair. Hubert
-looked round the room, and a moment sufficed to complete the survey. It was
-about seven feet long. The lower half of the window was curtained by a
-piece of muslin hardly bigger than a good-sized pocket-handkerchief; to do
-anything in this room except to lie in bed seemed difficult, and Hubert sat
-down on the bed and emptied out his pockets. He had just four pounds, and
-the calculation how long he could live on such a sum took him some time.
-His breakfast, whether he had it at home or in the coffee-house, would cost
-him at least fourpence. He thought he would be able to obtain a fairly good
-dinner in one of the little Italian restaurants for ninepence. His tea
-would cost the same as his breakfast. To these sums he must add twopence
-for tobacco and a penny for an evening paper--impossible to do without
-tobacco, and he must know what was going on in the world. He could
-therefore live for one shilling and eightpence a day--eleven shillings a
-week--to which he would have to add six shillings a week for rent,
-altogether seventeen shillings a week. He really did not see how he could
-do it cheaper. Four times seventeen are sixty-eight; sixty-eight shillings
-for a month of life, and he had eighty shillings--twelve shillings for
-incidental expenses; and out of that twelve shillings he must buy a shirt,
-a sponge, and a tooth brush, and when they were bought there would be very
-little left. He must finish his play under the month. Nothing could be
-clearer than that.
-
-Next morning he asked the landlady to let him have a cup of tea and some
-bread and butter, and he ate as much bread as he could, to save himself
-from being hungry in the middle of the day. He began work immediately, and
-continued until seven, and feeling then somewhat light-headed, but
-satisfied with himself, went to the nearest Italian restaurant. The food
-was better than he expected; but he spent twopence more than he had
-intended, so, to accustom himself to a life of strict measure and
-discipline, he determined to forego his tea that evening. And so he lived
-and worked until the end of the week.
-
-But the situation he had counted on to complete his fourth act had proved
-almost impracticable in the working out; he laboured on, however, and at
-the end of the tenth day at least one scene satisfied him. He read it over
-slowly, carefully, thought about it, decided that it was excellent, and lay
-down on his bed to consider it. At that moment it struck him that he had
-better calculate how much he had spent in the last ten days. He gathered
-himself into a sitting posture and counted his money; he had spent thirty
-shillings, and at that rate his money would not hold out till the end of
-the month. He must reduce his expenditure; but how? Impossible to find a
-room where he could live more cheaply than in the one he had got, and it is
-not easy to dine in London on less than ninepence. Only the poor can live
-cheaply. He pressed his hands to his face. His head seemed like splitting,
-and his monetary difficulty, united with his literary difficulties,
-produced a momentary insanity. Work that morning was impossible, so he went
-out to study the eating-houses of the neighbourhood. He must find one where
-he could dine for sixpence. Or he might buy a pound of cooked beef and take
-it home with him in a paper bag; but that would seem an almost intolerable
-imprisonment in his little room. He could go to a public-house and dine off
-a sausage and potato. But at that moment his attention was caught by black
-letters on a dun, yellowish ground: 'Lockhart's Cocoa Rooms.' Not having
-breakfasted, he decided to have a cup of cocoa and a roll.
-
-It was a large, barn-like place, the walls covered with a coat of grey-blue
-paint. Under the window there was a zinc counter, with zinc urns always
-steaming, emiting odours of tea, coffee, and cocoa. The seats were like
-those which give a garden-like appearance to the tops of some omnibuses.
-Each was made to hold two persons, and the table between them was large
-enough for four plates and four pairs of hands. A few hollow-chested men,
-the pale vagrants of civilisation, drowsed in the corners. They had been
-hunted through the night by the policeman, and had come in for something
-hot. Hubert noted the worn frock-coats, and the miserable arms coming out
-of shirtless sleeves. One looked up inquiringly, and Hubert thought how
-slight had become the line that divided him from the outcast. A
-serving-maid collected the plates, knives and forks, when the customers
-left, and carried them back to the great zinc counter.
-
-Impressed by his appearance, she brought him what he had ordered and took
-the money for it, although the custom of the place was for the customer to
-pay for food at the counter and carry it himself to the table at which he
-chose to eat. Hubert learnt that there was no set dinner, but there was a
-beef-steak pudding at one, price fourpence, a penny potatoes, a penny
-bread. So by dining at Lockhart's he would be able to cut down his daily
-expense by at least twopence; that would extend the time to finish his play
-by nearly a week. And if his appetite were not keen, he could assuage it
-with a penny plum pudding; or he could take a middle course, making his
-dinner off a sausage and mashed potatoes. The room was clean, well lighted,
-and airy; he could read his paper there, and forget his troubles in the
-observation of character. He even made friends. An old wizen creature, who
-had been a prize-fighter, told him of his triumphs. If he hadn't broke his
-hand on somebody's nose he'd have been champion light-weight of England.
-'And to think that I have come to this,' he added emphatically. 'Even them
-boys knock me about now, and 'alf a century ago I could 'ave cleared the
-bloomin' place.' There was a merry little waif from the circus who loved to
-come and sit with Hubert. She had been a rider, she said, but had broken
-her leg on one occasion, and cut her head all open on another, and had
-ended by running away with some one who had deserted her. 'So here I am,'
-she remarked, with a burst of laughter, 'talking to you. Did you never hear
-of Dolly Dayrell?' Hubert confessed that he had not. 'Why,' she said, 'I
-thought every one had.'
-
-About eight o'clock in the evening, the table near the stairs was generally
-occupied by flower-girls, dressed in dingy clothes, and brightly feathered
-hats. They placed their empty baskets on the floor, and shouted at their
-companions--men who sold newspapers, boot-laces, and cheap toys. About nine
-the boys came in, the boys who used to push the old prize-fighter about,
-and Hubert soon began to perceive how representative they were of all
-vices--gambling, theft, idleness, and cruelty were visible in their faces.
-They were led by a Jew boy who sold penny jewellery at the corner of Oxford
-Street, and they generally made for the tables at the end of the room, for
-there, unless custom was slack indeed, they could defeat the vigilance of
-the serving-maid and play at nap at their ease. The tray of penny jewellery
-was placed at the corner of a table, and a small boy set to watch over it.
-His duty was also to shuffle his feet when the servant-maid approached, and
-a precious drubbing he got if he failed to shuffle them loud enough. The
-''ot un,' as he was nicknamed, always had a pack of cards in his pocket,
-and to annex everything left on the tables he considered to be his
-privilege. One day, when he was asked how he came by the fine carnation in
-his buttonhole, he said it was a present from Sally, neglecting to add that
-he had told the child to steal it from a basket which a flower-girl had
-just put down.
-
-[Illustration: "'A dirty, hignominious lot, them boys is.'"]
-
-Hubert hated this boy, and once could not resist boxing his ears. The ''ot
-un' writhed easily out of his reach, and then assailed him with foul
-language, and so loud were his words that they awoke the innocent cause of
-the quarrel, a weak, sickly-looking man, with pale blue eyes and a blonde
-beard. Hubert had protected him before now against the brutality of the
-boys, who, when they were not playing nap, divided their pleasantries
-between him and the decrepit prize-fighter. He came in about nine, took a
-cup of coffee from the counter, and settled himself for a snooze. The boys
-knew this, and it was their amusement to keep him awake by pelting him with
-egg-shells and other missiles. Hubert noticed that he had always with him a
-red handkerchief full of some sort of loose rubbish, which the boys
-gathered when it fell about the floor, or purloined from the handkerchief
-when they judged that the owner was sufficiently fast asleep. Hubert now
-saw that the handkerchief was filled with bits of coloured chalk, and
-guessed that the man must be a pavement artist.
-
-'A dirty, hignominious lot, them boys is,' said the artist, fixing his
-pale, melancholy eyes on Hubert; 'bad manners, no eddication, and, above
-all, no respect.'
-
-'They are an unmannerly lot--that Jew boy especially. I don't think there's
-a vice he hasn't got.'
-
-The artist stared at Hubert a long time in silence. A thought seemed to be
-stirring in his mind.
-
-'I'm speaking, I can see, to a man of eddication. I'm a fust-rate judge of
-character, though I be but a pavement artist; but a picture's none the less
-a picture, no matter where it is drawn. That's true, ain't it?'
-
-'Quite true. A horse is a horse, and an ass is an ass, no matter what
-stable you put them into.'
-
-The artist laughed a guttural laugh, and, fixing his pale blue porcelain
-eyes on Hubert, he said--
-
-'Yes; see I made no bloomin' error when I said you was a man of eddication.
-A literary gent, I should think. In the reporting line, most like. Down in
-the luck like myself. What was it--drink? Got the chuck?'
-
-'No,' said Hubert, 'never touch it. Out of work.'
-
-'No offence, master, we're all mortal, we is all weak, and in misfortune we
-goes to it. It was them boys that drove me to it.'
-
-'How was that?'
-
-'They was always round my show; no getting rid of them, and their remarks
-created a disturbance; the perlice said he wouldn't 'ave it, and when the
-perlice won't 'ave it, what's a poor man to do? They are that hignorant.
-But what's the use of talking of it, it only riles me.' The blue-eyed man
-lay back in his seat, and his head sank on his chest. He looked as if he
-were going to sleep again, but on Hubert's asking him to explain his
-troubles, he leaned across the table.
-
-'Well, I'll tell yer. Yer be an eddicated man, and I likes to talk to them
-that 'as 'ad an eddication. Yer says, and werry truly, just now, that
-changing the stable don't change an 'orse into a hass, or a hass into an
-'orse. That is werry true, most true, none but a eddicated man could 'ave
-made that 'ere hobservation. I likes yer for it. Give us yer 'and. The
-public just thinks too much of the stable, and not enough of what's inside.
-Leastways that's my experience of the public, and I 'ave been a-catering
-for the public ever since I was a growing lad--sides of bacon, ships on
-fire, good old ship on fire.... I knows the public. Yer don't follow me?'
-
-'Not quite.'
-
-'A moment, and I'll explain. You'll admit there's no blooming reason except
-the public's blooming hignorance why a man shouldn't do as good a picture
-on the pavement as on a piece of canvas, provided he 'ave the blooming
-genius. There is no doubt that with them 'ere chalks and a nice smooth
-stone that Raphael--I 'ave been to the National Gallery and 'ave studied
-'is work, and werry fine some of it is, although I don't altogether
-hold--but that's another matter. What was I a-saying of? I remember,--that
-with them 'ere chalks, and a nice smooth stone, there's no reason why a
-masterpiece shouldn't be done. That's right, ain't it? I ask you, as a man
-of eddication, to say if that ain't right; as a representative of the
-Press, I asks you to say.' Hubert nodded, and the pale-eyed man continued.
-'Well, that's what the public won't see, can't see. Raphael, says I, could
-'ave done a masterpiece with them 'ere chalks and a nice smooth stone. But
-do yer think 'e 'd 'ave been allowed? Do yer think the perlice would 'ave
-stood it? Do yer think the public would 'ave stood him doing masterpieces
-on the pavement? I'd give 'im just one afternoon. Them boys would 'ave got
-'im into trouble, just as they did me. Raphael would 'ave been told to wipe
-them out just as I was.'
-
-The conversation paused; and, half amused, half frightened, Hubert
-considered the pale vague face, and he was struck by the scattered look of
-aspiration that wandered in the pale blue eyes.
-
-'I'll tell you,' said the man, growing more excited, and leaning further
-across the table; 'I'll tell you, because I knows you for an eddicated man,
-and won't blab. S'pose yer thinks, like the rest of the world, that the
-chaps wot smears, for it ain't drawing, the pavement with bits of bacon, a
-ship on fire, and the regulation oysters, does them out of their own
-'eads?' Hubert nodded. 'I'm not surprised that you do, all the world do,
-and the public chucks down its coppers to the poor hartist; but 'e aint no
-hartist, no more than is them 'ere boys that did for my show.' Leaning
-still further forward, he lowered his voice to a whisper. 'They learns it
-all by 'art; there is schools for the teaching of it down in Whitechapel.
-They can just do what they learns by 'art, not one of them could draw that
-'ere chair or table from natur'; but I could. I 'ave an original talent. It
-was a long time afore I found out it was there,' he said, tapping his
-forehead; 'but it is there,' he said, fixing his eyes on Hubert, 'and when
-it is there they can't take it away--I mean my mates--though they do laugh
-at my ideas. They call me "the genius," for they don't believe in me, but I
-believe in myself, and they laughs best that laughs last.... I don't know,'
-he said, looking round him, his eyes full of reverie, 'that the public
-liked my fancy landscapes better than the ship on fire, but I said the
-public will come to them in time, and I continued my fancy landscapes. But
-one day in Trafalgar Square it came on to rain very 'eavy, and I went for
-shelter into the National Gallery. It was my fust visit, and I was struck
-all of a 'eap, and ever since I can 'ardly bring myself to go on with the
-drudgery of the piece of bacon, and the piece of cheese, with the mouse
-nibbling at it. And ever since my 'ead 'as been filled with other things,
-though for a long time I could not make exactly out what. I 'ave 'eard that
-that is always the case with men that 'as an idea--daresay you 'ave found
-it so yourself. So in my spare time I goes to the National to think it out,
-and in studying the pictures there I got wery interested in a chap called
-Hetty, and 'e do paint the female form divine. I says to myself, Why not go
-in for lovely woman? the public may not care for fancy landscapes, but the
-public allus likes a lovely woman, and, as well as being popular, lovely
-woman is 'igh 'art. So, after dinner hour, I sets to work, and sketches in
-a blue sea with three bathers, and two boxes, with the 'orse's head looking
-out from behind one of the boxes. For a fust attempt at the nude, I assure
-you--it ain't my way to blow my own trumpet, but I can say that the crowd
-that 'ere picture did draw was bigger than any that 'ad assembled about the
-bits o' bacon and ship-a-fire of all the other coves. 'Ad I been let alone,
-I should 'ave made my fortune, but the crowd was so big and the curiosity
-so great that it took the perlice all their time to keep the pavement from
-being blocked. It wasn't that the public didn't like it enough, it was that
-the public liked it too much, that was the reason of my misfortune.'
-
-'What do you mean?' said Hubert.
-
-'Well, yer see them boys was a-hawking their cheap toys in the
-neighbourhood, and when they got wind of my success they comes round to
-see, and they remains on account of the crowd. Pockets was picked, I don't
-say they wasn't, and the perlice turned rusty, and then a pious old gent
-comes along, and 'earing the remarks of them boys, which I admit wasn't
-nice, complains to the hauthorities, and I was put down! Now, what I wants
-to know is why my art should be made to suffer for the beastly-mindedness
-of them 'ere boys.'
-
-Hubert admitted that there seemed to be an injustice somewhere, and asked
-the artist if he had never tried again.
-
-'Try again? Should think I did. When once a man 'as tasted of 'igh art, he
-can't keep his blooming fingers out of it. It was impossible after the
-success of my bathers to go back to the bacon, so I thought I would
-circumvent the hauthorities. I goes to the National Gallery, makes a
-sketch, 'ere it is,' and after some fumbling in his breast pocket, he
-produced a greasy piece of paper, which he handed to Hubert. 'S'pose yer
-know the picture?' Hubert admitted that he did not. 'Well, that is a
-drawing from Gainsborough's celebrated picture of Medora a-washing of her
-feet.... But the perlice wouldn't 'ave it any more than my original, 'e
-said it was worse than the bathers at Margaret, and when I told the
-hignorant brute wot it was, 'e said he wanted no hargument, that 'e
-wouldn't 'ave it.'
-
-Hubert had noticed, during the latter part of the narrative, a look of
-dubious cunning twinkling in the pale eyes; but now this look died away,
-and the eyes resumed their habitual look of vague reverie.
-
-'I've been 'ad up before the Beak: from him I expected more enlightenment,
-but he, too, said 'e wouldn't 'ave it, and I got a month. But I'll beat
-them yet, the public is on my side, and if it worn't for them 'ere boys,
-I'd say that the public could be helevated. They calls me "the genius," and
-they is right.' Then something seemed to go out like a flame, the face grew
-dim, and changed expression. 'It is 'ere all right,' he said, no longer
-addressing Hubert, but speaking to himself, 'and since it is there, it must
-come out.'
-
-
-
-
-IV
-
-
-Hubert at last found himself obliged to write to Ford for an advance of
-money. But Ford replied that he would advance money only on the delivery of
-the completed manuscript. And the whole of one night, in a room hardly
-eight feet long, sitting on his bed, he strove to complete the fourth and
-fifth acts. But under the pressure of such necessity ideas died within him.
-And all through the night, and even when the little window, curtained with
-a bit of muslin hardly bigger than a pocket-handkerchief, had grown white
-with dawn, he sat gazing at the sheet of paper, his brain on fire, unable
-to think. Laying his pen down in despair, he thought of the thousands who
-would come to his aid if they only knew--if they only knew! And soon after
-he heard life beginning again in the little brick street. He felt that his
-brain was giving way, that if he did not find change, whatever it was, he
-must surely run raving mad. He had had enough of England, and would leave
-it for America, Australia--anywhere. He wanted change. The present was
-unendurable. How would he get to America? Perhaps a clerkship on board one
-of the great steamships might be obtained.
-
-The human animal in extreme misery becomes self-reliant, and Hubert hardly
-thought of making application to his uncle. The last time he had applied
-for help his letter had remained unanswered, and he now felt that he must
-make his own living or die. And, quite indifferent as to what might befall
-him, he walked next day to the Victoria Docks. He did not know where or how
-to apply for work, and he tired himself in fruitless endeavour. At last he
-felt he could strive with fate no longer, and wandered mile after mile,
-amused and forgetful of his own misery in the spectacle of the river--the
-rose sky, the long perspectives, the houses and warehouses showing in fine
-outline, and then the wonderful blue night gathering in the forest of masts
-and rigging. He was admirably patient. There was no fretfulness in his
-soul, nor did he rail against the world's injustice, but took his
-misfortunes with sweet gentleness.
-
-He slept in a public-house, and next day resumed his idle search for
-employment. The weather was mild and beautiful, his wants were simple, a
-cup of coffee and a roll, a couple of sausages, and the day passed in a
-sort of morose and passionless contemplation. He thought of everything and
-nothing, least of all of how he should find money for the morrow. When the
-day came, and the penny to buy a cup of coffee was wanting, he quite
-naturally, without giving it a second thought, engaged himself as a
-labourer, and worked all day carrying sacks of grain out of a vessel's
-hold. For a large part of his nature was patient and simple, docile as an
-animal's. There was in him so much that was rudimentary, that in accepting
-this burden of physical toil he was acting not in contradiction to, but in
-full and perfect harmony with, his true nature.
-
-But at the end of a week his health began to give way, and, like a man
-after a violent debauch, he thought of returning to a more normal
-existence. He had left the manuscript of his unfortunate play in the North.
-Had they destroyed it? The involuntary fear of the writer for his child
-made him smile. What did it matter? Clearly the first thing to do would be
-to write to the editor of _The Cosmopolitan_, and ask if he could find him
-some employment, something certain; writing occasional articles for
-newspapers, that he couldn't do.
-
-Hubert had saved twelve shillings. He would therefore be able to pay his
-landlady: he smiled--one of his landladies! The earlier debt was now
-hopelessly out of his reach, and seemed to represent a social plane from
-which he had for ever fallen. If he had succeeded in getting that play
-right, what a difference it would have made! He would have been able to do
-a number of things he had never done, things which he had always desired to
-do. He had desired above all to travel--to see France and Italy; to linger,
-to muse in the shadows of the world's past; and after this he had desired
-marriage, an English wife, an English home, beautiful children, leisure,
-the society of friends. A successful play would have given him all these
-things, and now his dream must remain for ever unrealised by him. He had
-sunk out of sight and hearing of such life.
-
-Rose was another; she might sink as he had sunk; she might never find the
-opportunity of realising her desire. How well she would have played that
-part! He knew what was in her. And now! What did his failure to write that
-play condemn him to? Heaven only knows, he did not wish to think. Strange,
-was it not strange?... A man of genius--many believed him a genius--and yet
-he was incapable of earning his daily bread otherwise than by doing the
-work of a navvy. Even that he could not do well, society had softened his
-muscles and effeminised his constitution. Indeed, he did not know what life
-fate had willed him for. He seemed to be out of place everywhere. His best
-chance was to try to obtain a clerkship. The editor of _The Cosmopolitan_
-might be able to do that for him; if he could not, far better it would be
-to leave a world in which he was _out of place_, and through no fault of
-his own--that was the hard part of it. Hard part! Nonsense! What does Fate
-know of our little rights and wrongs--or care? Her intentions are
-inscrutable; she watches us come and go, and gives no sign. Prayers are
-vain. The good man is punished, and the wicked is sent on his way
-rejoicing.
-
-In such mournful thought, his clothes stained and torn, with all the traces
-of a week's toil in the docks upon them, Hubert made his way round St.
-Paul's and across Holborn. As he was about to cross into Oxford Street, he
-heard some one accost him,--
-
-'Oh, Mr. Price, is that you?' It was Rose. 'Where have you been all this
-time?'
-
-She seemed so strange, so small, and so much alone in the great
-thoroughfare, that Hubert forgot all his own troubles in a sudden interest
-in this little mite. 'Where have you been hiding yourself?... It is lucky I
-met you. Don't you know that Ford has decided to revive _Divorce_?'
-
-'You don't mean it!'
-
-'Yes; Ford said that the last acts of _The Gipsy_ were not satisfactorily
-worked out, and as there was something wrong with that Hamilton Brown's
-piece, he has decided to revive _Divorce_. He says it never was properly
-played ... he thinks he'll make a hit in the husband's part, and I daresay
-he will. But I have been unfortunate again; I wanted the part of the
-adventuress. I really could play it. I don't look it, I know ... I have no
-weight, but I could play it for all that. The public mightn't see me in it
-at first, but in five minutes they would.'
-
-'And what part has he cast you for--the young girl?'
-
-'Of course; there's no other part. He says I look it; but what's the good
-of looking it when you don't feel it? If he had cast me for Mrs.
-Barrington, I should have had just the five minutes in the second act that
-I have been waiting for so long, and I should have just wiped Miss Osborne
-out, acted her off the stage.... I know I should; you needn't believe it if
-don't like, but I know I should.'
-
-Hubert wondered how any one could feel so sure of herself, and then he
-said, 'Yes, I think you could do just what you say.... How do you think
-Miss Osborne will play the part?'
-
-'She'll be correct enough; she'll miss nothing, and yet somehow she'll miss
-the whole thing. But you must go at once to Ford. He was saying only this
-morning that if you didn't turn up soon, he'd have to give up the idea.'
-
-'I can't go and see him to-night. You see what a state I'm in.'
-
-'You're rather dusty; where have you been? what have you been doing?'
-
-'I've been down at the dock.... I thought of going to America.'
-
-'Well, we'll talk about that another time. It doesn't matter if you are a
-bit dusty and worn-out-looking. Now that he's going to revive your play,
-he'll let you have some money. You might get a new hat, though. I don't
-know how much they cost, but I've five shillings; can you get one for
-that?'
-
-Hubert thanked her.
-
-'But you are not offended?'
-
-'Offended, my dear Rose! I shall be able to manage. I'll get a brush up
-somewhere.'
-
-'That's all right. Now I'm going to jump into that 'bus,' and she signed
-with her parasol to the conductor. 'Mind you see Ford to-night,' she cried;
-and a moment after he saw a small space of blue back seated against one of
-the windows.
-
-
-
-
-V
-
-
-There was much prophecy abroad. Stiggins' words, 'The piece never did, and
-never will draw money,' were evidently present in everybody's mind. They
-were visible in Ford's face, and more than once Hubert expected to hear
-that--on account of severe indisposition--Mr. Montague Ford has been
-obliged to indefinitely postpone his contemplated revival of Mr. Hubert
-Price's play _Divorce_. But, besides the apprehension that Stiggins'
-unfavourable opinion of his enterprise had engendered in him, Ford was
-obviously provoked by Hubert's reluctance to execute the alterations he had
-suggested. Night after night, sometimes until six in the morning, Hubert
-sat up considering them. Thanks to Ford's timely advance he was back in his
-old rooms in Fitzroy Street. All was as it had been. He was working at his
-play every evening, waiting for Rose's footsteps on the stairs. And yet a
-change had come into his life! He believed now that his feet were set on
-the way to fortune--that he would soon be happy.
-
-He stared at the bright flame of the lamp, he listened to the silence. The
-clock chimed sharply, and the windows were growing grey. Hubert had begun
-to drowse in his chair; but he had promised to rewrite the young girl's
-part, Ford having definitely refused to intrust Rose with the part of the
-adventuress. He was sorry for this. He believed that Rose had not only
-talent, but genius. Besides, they were friends, neighbours; he would like
-to give her a chance of distinguishing herself--the chance which she was
-seeking. All the time he could not but realise that, however he might
-accentuate and characterise the part of the sentimental girl, Rose would
-not be able to do much with it. To bring out her special powers something
-strange, wild, or tragic was required. But of what use thinking of what was
-not to be? Having made some alterations and additions he folded his papers
-up, and addressed them to Miss Massey. He wrote on a piece of paper that
-they were to be given to her at once, and that he was to be called at ten.
-There was a rehearsal at twelve.
-
-On the night of the first performance, Hubert asked Rose to dine in his
-rooms. Mr. Wilson proposed that they should have a roast chicken, and Annie
-was sent to fetch a bottle of champagne from the grocer's. Annie had been
-given a ticket for the pit. Mrs. Wilson was going to the upper boxes. Annie
-said,--
-
-'Why, you look as if you was going to a funeral, and not to a play. Why
-don't ye laugh?'
-
-In truth, Hubert and Rose were a little silent. Rose was thinking how she
-could say certain lines. She had said them right once at rehearsal, but had
-not since been able to reproduce to her satisfaction a certain effect of
-voice. Hubert was too nervous to talk. There was nothing in his mind but
-'Will the piece succeed? What shall I do if it fails?' He could give heed
-to nothing but himself, all the world seemed blotted out, and he suffered
-the pain of excessive self-concentration. Rose, on the other hand, had lost
-sight of herself, and existed almost unconsciously in the soul of another
-being. She was sometimes like a hypnotised spectator watching with foolish,
-involuntary curiosity the actions of one whom she had been bidden to watch.
-Then a little cloud would gather over her eyes, and then this other being
-would rise as if out of her very entrails and recreate her, fashioning her
-to its own image and likeness.
-
-She did not answer when she was spoken to, and when the question was
-repeated, she awoke with a little start. Dinner was eaten in morbid
-silence, with painful and fitful efforts to appear interested in each
-other. Walking to the theatre, they once took the wrong turning and had to
-ask the way. At the stage door they smiled painfully, nodded, glad to part.
-Hubert went up to Montague Ford's room. He found the comedian on a low
-stool, seated before a low table covered with brushes and cosmetics, in
-front of a triple glass.
-
-'My dear friend, do not trouble me now. I am thinking of my part.'
-
-Hubert turned to go.
-
-'Stay a moment,' cried the actor. 'You know when the husband meets the wife
-he has divorced?'
-
-Hubert remembered the moment referred to, and, with anxious, doubting eyes,
-the comedian sought from the author justification for some intonations and
-gestures which seemed to him to form part and parcel of the nature of the
-man whose drunkenness he had so admirably depicted on his face.
-
-'"_This is most unfortunate, very unlucky--very, my dear Louisa; but----_"
-
-'"_I am no longer obliged to bear with your insults; I can now defend
-myself against you._"
-
-[Illustration: "In the third row Harding stood talking to a young man."]
-
-'Now, is that your idea of the scene?'
-
-A pained look came upon Hubert's face. 'Don't question me now, my dear
-fellow. I cannot fix my attention. I can see, however, that your make-up is
-capital--you are the man himself.'
-
-The actor was satisfied, and in his satisfaction he said, 'I think it will
-be all right, old chap.'
-
-Hubert hoped to reach his box without meeting critics or authors. The
-serving-maids bowed and smiled,--he was the author of the play. 'They'll
-think still more of me if the notices are right,' he thought, as he hurried
-upstairs, and from behind the curtain of his box he peeped down and counted
-the critics who edged their way down the stalls. Harding stood in the third
-row talking to a young man. He said, 'You mean the woman with the black
-hair piled into a point, and fastened with a steel circlet. A face of
-sheep-like sensuality. Red lips and a round receding chin. A large bosom,
-and two thin arms showing beneath the opera cloak, which she has not yet
-thrown from her shoulders. I do not know her--_une laideur attirante_. Many
-a man might be interested in her. But do you see the woman in the
-stage-box? You would not believe it, but she is sixty, and has only just
-begun to speak of herself as an old woman. She kept her figure, and had an
-admirer when she was fifty-eight.'
-
-'What has become of him?'
-
-'They quarrelled; two years ago he told her he hoped never to see her ugly
-old face again. And that delicate little creature in the box next to
-her--that pale diaphanous face?'
-
-'With a young man hanging over her whispering in her ear?'
-
-'Yes. She hates the theatre; it gives her neuralgia; but she attends all
-the first nights because her one passion is to be made love to in public.
-If her admirer did not hang over her in front of the box just as that man
-is doing, she would not tolerate him for a week.'
-
-At that moment the conversation was interrupted by a new-comer, who asked
-if he had seen the play when it was first produced.
-
-'Yes,' said Harding; 'I did.' And he continued his search for acquaintances
-amid white rows of female backs, necks, and half-seen profiles--amid the
-black cloth shoulders cut sharply upon the illumined curtain.
-
-'And what do you think of it? Do you think it will succeed this time?'
-
-'Ford will create an impression in the part; but I don't think the piece
-will run.'
-
-'And why? Because the public is too stupid?'
-
-'Partly, and partly because Price is only an intentionist. He cannot carry
-an idea quite through.'
-
-'Are you going to write about it?'
-
-'I may.'
-
-'And what will you say?'
-
-'Oh, most interesting things to be said. Let's take the case of Hubert
-Price ... Ah, there, the curtain is going up.'
-
-The curtain rolled slowly up, and in a small country drawing-room, in very
-simple but very pointedly written dialogue, the story of Mrs. Holmes'
-domestic misfortunes was gradually unfolded. It appeared that she had
-flirted with Captain Grey; he had written her some compromising letters,
-and she had once been to his rooms alone. So the Court had pronounced a
-decree _nisi_. But Mrs. Holmes had not been unfaithful to her husband. She
-had flirted with Captain Grey because her husband's attentions to a certain
-Mrs. Barrington had maddened her, and in her jealous rage had written
-foolish letters, and been to see Captain Grey.
-
-Hubert noticed that folk were still asking for their seats, and pushing
-down the very rows in which the most influential critics were sitting. They
-exchanged a salutation with their friends in the dress-circle, and, when
-they were seated, looked around, making observations regarding the
-appearance of the house; and all the while the actors were speaking. Hubert
-trembled with fear and rage. Would these people never give their attention
-to the stage? If they had been sitting by him, he could have struck them.
-Then a line turned into nonsense by the actress who played Mrs. Holmes was
-a lancinating pain; and the actor who played Captain Grey, played so slowly
-that Hubert could hardly refrain from calling from his box. He looked round
-the theatre, noticing the indifferent faces of the critics, and the women's
-shoulders seemed to him especially vacuous and imbecile.
-
-The principal scene of the second act was between Mrs. Holmes and the man
-who had divorced her. He has-been driven to drink by the vile behaviour of
-his second wife; he is ruined in health and in pocket, and has come to the
-woman he wronged to beg forgiveness; he knows she has learnt to love
-Captain Grey, but will not marry him, because she believes that once
-married always married. There is only one thing he can do to repair the
-wrong he has done--he will commit suicide, and so enable her to marry the
-man she loves. He tells her that he has bought the pistol to do it with,
-and the words, 'Not here! not here!' escape from her; and he answers, 'No,
-not here, but in a cab. I've got one at the door.' He goes out; Captain
-Grey enters, and Mrs. Holmes begs him to save her husband. While they are
-discussing how this is to be done, he re-enters, saying that his conscience
-smote him as he was going to pull the trigger. Will she forgive him? If she
-won't, he must make an end of himself. She says she will.
-
-In the third act Hubert had attempted to paint Mr. Holmes' vain efforts to
-reform his life. But the constant presence of Captain Grey in the
-household, his attempts to win Mrs. Holmes from her husband, and the
-drunken husband's amours with the servant-maid disgusted rather than
-horrified. In the fourth act the wretched husband admits that his
-reformation is impossible, and that, although he has no courage to commit
-suicide and set his wife free, he will return to his evil courses; they
-will sooner or later make an end of him. The slowness and deadly gravity
-with which Ford took this scene rendered it intolerable; and,
-notwithstanding the beauty of the conclusion, when the deserted wife, in
-the silence of her drawing-room, reads again Captain Grey's letter, telling
-her that he has left England for ever, and with another, the success of the
-play was left in doubt, and the audience filed out, talking, chattering,
-arguing, wondering what the public verdict would be.
-
-To avoid commiseration of heartless friends and the triumphant glances of
-literary enemies, Hubert passed through the door leading on to the stage.
-Scene-shifters were brutally pushing away what remained of his play; and
-the presence of Hamilton Brown, the dramatic author, talking to Ford, was
-at that moment particularly disagreeable. On catching sight of Hubert,
-Brown ran to him, shook him by the hand, and murmured some discreet
-congratulations. He preferred the piece, however, as it had been originally
-written, and suggested to Ford the advisability of returning to the first
-text. Then Ford went upstairs to take his paint off, and Hubert walked
-about the stage with Brown. Brown's insincerity was sufficiently
-transparent; but men in Hubert's position catch at straws, and he soon
-began to believe that the attitude of the public towards his play was not
-so unfavourable as he had imagined.
-
-Hubert tried to summon up a smile for the stage-door keeper, who, he
-feared, had heard that the piece had failed, and then the moment they got
-outside he begged Rose to tell him the exact truth. She assured him that
-Ford had said that he had always counted on a certain amount of opposition;
-but that he believed that the general public, being more free of prejudice
-and less sophisticated, would be impressed by the simple humanity of the
-play. The conversation paused, and at the end of an irritating silence he
-said, 'You were excellent, as good as any one could be in a part that did
-not suit them. Ah, if he had cast you for the adventuress, how you would
-have played it!...'
-
-'I'm so glad you are pleased. I hope my notices will be good. Do you think
-they will?'
-
-'Yes, your notices will be all right,' he answered, with a sigh.
-
-'And your notices will be all right too. No one can say what is going to
-succeed. There was a call after each of the last three acts.... I don't see
-how a piece could go better. It is the suspense....'
-
-'Ah, yes, the suspense!'
-
-They lingered on the landing, and Hubert said, 'Won't you come in for a
-moment?' She followed him into the room. His calm face, usually a perfect
-picture of repose and self-possession, betrayed his emotion by a certain
-blankness in the eyes, certain contractions in the skin of the forehead.
-'I'm afraid,' he said, 'there's no hope.'
-
-'Oh, you mustn't say that!' she replied. 'I think it went very well
-indeed.... I know I did nothing with the young girl. I oughtn't to have
-undertaken the part.'
-
-'You were excellent. If we only get some good notices. If we don't, I shall
-never get another play of mine acted.' He looked at her imploringly,
-thirsting for a woman's sympathy. But the little girl was thinking of
-certain effects which she would have made, and which the actress who had
-played the adventuress had failed to make.
-
-'I watched her all the time,' she said, 'following every line, saying all
-the time, "Oh yes, that's all very nice and very proper, my young woman;
-but it's not it; no, not at all--not within a hundred miles of it." I don't
-think she ever really touched the part--do you?' Hubert did not answer, and
-a quiver of distraction ran through the muscles of her face.
-
-'Why don't you answer me?'
-
-'I can't answer you,' he said abruptly. Then remembering, he added,
-'Forgive me; I can think of nothing now.' He hid his face in his hands, and
-sobbed twice--two heavy, choking sobs, pregnant with the weight of anguish
-lying on his heart.
-
-Seeing how much he suffered, she laid her hand on his shoulder. 'I am very
-sorry; I wish I could help you. I know how it tears the heart when one
-cannot get out what one has in one's brain.'
-
-Her artistic appreciation of his suffering only jarred him the more. What
-he longed for was some kind, simple-hearted woman who would say, 'Never
-mind, dear; the play was perfectly right, only they did not understand it;
-I love you better than ever.' But Rose could not give him the sympathy he
-wanted; and to be alone was almost a relief. He dared not go to bed; he sat
-looking into space. The roar of London hushed till it was no more than a
-faint murmur, the hissing of the gas grew louder, and still Hubert sat
-thinking, the same thoughts battling in his brain. He looked into the
-future, but could see nothing but suicide. His uncle? He had applied to him
-before for help; there was no hope there. Then he tramped up and down,
-maddened by the infernal hissing of the gas; and then threw himself into
-his arm-chair. And so a terrible night wore away; and it was not until long
-after the early carts had begun to rattle in the streets that exhaustion
-brought an end to his sufferings, and he rolled into bed.
-
-
-
-
-VI
-
-
-'What will ye 'ave to eat? Eggs and bacon?'
-
-'No, no!'
-
-'Well, then, 'ave a chop?'
-
-'No, no!'
-
-'Ye must 'ave something.'
-
-'A cup of tea, a slice of toast. I'm not hungry.'
-
-'Well, ye are worse than a young lady for a happetite. Miss Massey 'as sent
-you down these 'ere papers.'
-
-The servant-girl laid the papers on the bed, and Hubert lay back on his
-pillow, so that he might collect his thoughts. Stretching forth his hands,
-he selected the inevitable paper.
-
-'For those who do not believe that our English home life is composed
-mainly, if not entirely, of lying, drunkenness, and conjugal infidelity,
-and its sequel divorce, yester evening at the Queen's Theatre must have
-been a sad and dismal experience. That men and women who have vowed to love
-each other do sometimes prove false to their troth no reasonable man will
-deny. With the divorce court before our eyes, even the most enthusiastic
-believer in the natural goodness and ultimate perfectibility of human
-nature must admit that men and women are frail. But drunkenness and
-infidelity are happily not characteristic of our English homes. Then why,
-we ask, should a dramatist select such a theme, and by every artifice of
-dialogue force into prominence all that is mean and painful in an
-unfortunate woman's life? Always the same relentless method; the cold,
-passionless curiosity of the vivisector; the scalpel is placed under the
-nerve, and we are called upon to watch the quivering flesh. Never the kind
-word, the tears, the effusion, which is man's highest prerogative, and
-which separates him from the brute and signifies the immortal end for which
-he was created. We hold that it is a pity to see so much talent wasted, and
-it was indeed a melancholy sight to see so many capable actors and
-actresses labouring to----'
-
-'This is even worse than usual,' said Hubert; and glancing through half a
-column of hysterical commonplace, he came upon the following:--
-
-'But if this woman had succeeded in reclaiming from vice the man who
-unjustly divorced her, and who in his misery goes back to ask her
-forgiveness for pity's sake, what a lesson we should have had! And, with
-lightened and not with heavier hearts, we should have left the theatre
-comforted, better and happier men and women. But turning his back on the
-goodness, truth, and love whither he had induced us to believe he was
-leading us, the author flagrantly makes the woman contradict her whole
-nature in the last act; and, because her husband falls again, she, instead
-of raising him with all the tender mercies and humanities of wifehood,
-declares that her life has been one long mistake, and that she accepts the
-divorce which the Court had unjustly granted. The moral, if such a word may
-be applied to such a piece is this: "The law may be bad, but human nature
-is worse."'
-
-The other morning papers took the same view,--a great deal of talent wasted
-on a subject that could please no one. Hubert threw the papers aside, lay
-back, and in the lucid idleness of the bed his thoughts grew darker. It was
-hardly possible that the piece could survive such notices; and if it did
-not? Well, he would have to go. But until the piece was taken out of the
-bills it would be a weakness to harbour the ugly thought.
-
-There were, however, the evening papers to look forward to, and soon after
-midday Annie was sent to buy all that had appeared. Hubert expected to find
-in these papers a more delicate appreciation of his work. Many of the
-critics of the evening press were his personal friends, and nearly all were
-young men in full sympathy with the new school of dramatic thought. He read
-paper after paper with avidity; and Annie was sent in a cab to buy one that
-had not yet found its way so far north as Fitzroy Street. The opinion of
-this paper was of all importance, and Hubert tore it open with trembling
-fingers. Although more temperately written than the others, it was clearly
-favourable, and Hubert sighed a sweet sigh of relief. A weight was lifted
-from him; the world suddenly seemed to grow brighter; and he went to the
-theatre that evening, and, half doubting and half confidently, presented
-himself at the door of Montague Ford's dressing-room. The actor had not yet
-begun to dress, and was busy writing letters. He stretched his hand
-hurriedly to Hubert.
-
-'Excuse me, my dear fellow; I have a couple of letters to finish.'
-
-Hubert sat down, glancing nervously from the actor to the morning papers
-with which the table was strewn. There was not an evening paper there. Had
-he not seen them? At the end of about ten minutes the actor said,--
-
-'Well, this is a bad business; they are terribly down on us--aren't they?
-What do you think?'
-
-'Have you seen the evening papers--_The Telephone_, for instance?'
-
-'Oh yes, I've seen them all; but the evening papers don't amount to much.
-Stiggins's article was terrible. I am afraid he has killed the piece.'
-
-'Don't you think it will run, then?'
-
-'Well, that depends upon the public, of course. If they like it, I'll keep
-it on.'
-
-'How's the booking?'
-
-'Not good.' Montague Ford moved his papers absent-mindedly. At the end of a
-long silence he said, 'Even if the piece did catch on, it would take a lot
-of working up to undo the mischief of those articles. Of course you can
-rely on me to give it every chance. I shan't take it out of the bills if I
-can possibly help.'
-
-'There is my _Gipsy_.'
-
-'I have another piece ready to put into rehearsal; it was arranged for six
-months ago. I only consented to produce your play because--well, because
-there has been such an outcry lately about art.... Tremendous part for me
-in the new piece... I'm sure you'll like it.'
-
-The business did improve, but so very slowly that Hubert was afraid Ford
-would lose patience and take the play out of the bills. But while the fate
-of the play hung in the balance, Hubert's life was being rendered
-unbearable by duns. They had found him out, one and all; to escape being
-served was an impossibility; and now his table was covered with summonses
-to appear at the County Court. This would not matter if the piece once took
-the public taste. Then he would be able to pay every one, and have some
-time to rest and think. And there seemed every prospect of its catching on.
-Discussions regarding the morality of the play had arisen in the
-newspapers, and the eternal question whether men and women are happier
-married or unmarried had reached its height. Hubert spent the afternoon
-addressing letters to the papers, striving to fan the flame of controversy.
-Every evening he listened for Rose's footstep on the stairs.--How did the
-piece go?--Was there a better house? Money or paper?--Have you seen the
-notice in the ----?--First-rate, wasn't it?--That ought to do some
-good.--I've heard there was a notice in the ----, but I haven't seen it.
-Have you?--No; but So-and-so saw the paper, and said there was nothing in
-it. And, do you know, I hear there's going to be a notice in _The Modern
-Review_, and that So-and-so is writing it.
-
-Every post brought newspapers; the room was filled with newspapers--all
-kinds of newspapers--papers one has never heard of,--French papers, Welsh
-papers, North of England papers, Scotch and Irish papers. Hubert read
-columns about himself, anecdotes of all kinds,--where he was born, who were
-his parents, and what first induced him to attempt writing for the stage;
-his personal appearance, mode of life, the cut of his clothes; his
-religious, moral, and political views. Had he been the plaintiff in an
-action for criminal libel, greater industry in the collection and the
-fabrication of personal details could hardly have been displayed.
-
-But at these articles Hubert only glanced; he was interested in his piece,
-not in himself, and when Annie brought up _The Modern Review_ he tore it
-open, knowing he would find there criticism more fundamental, more
-searching. But as he read, the expression of hope which his face wore
-changed to one of pain pitiful to look upon. The article began with a
-sketch of the general situation, and in a tone of commiseration, of
-benevolent malice, the writer pointed out how inevitable it was that the
-critics should have taken Mr. Price, when _Divorce_ was first produced, for
-the new dramatic genius they were waiting for. 'There comes a moment,' said
-this caustic writer, 'in the affairs of men when the new is not only
-eagerly accepted, but when it is confounded with the original. Wearied by
-the old stereotyped form of drama, the critics had been astonished by a
-novelty of subject, more apparent than real, and by certain surface
-qualities in the execution; they had hailed the work as being original both
-in form and in matter, whereas all that was good in the play had been
-borrowed from France and Scandinavia. _Divorce_ was the inevitable product
-of the time. It had been written by Mr. Price, but it might have been
-written by a dozen other young men--granting intelligence, youth, leisure,
-a university education, and three or four years of London life--any one of
-a dozen clever young men who frequent West End drawing-rooms and dabble in
-literature might have written it. All that could be said was that the play
-was, or rather had been, _dans le mouvement_; and original work never is
-_dans le mouvement_. _Divorce_ was nothing more than the product of certain
-surroundings, and remembering Mr. Price's other plays, there seemed to be
-no reason to believe that he would do better. Mr. Price had tried his hand
-at criticism, and that was a sure sign that the creative faculty had begun
-to wither. His critical essays were not rich nor abundant in thought, they
-were not the skirmishing of a man fighting for his ideas, they were not
-preliminary to a great battle; they were at once vague and pedantic,
-somewhat futile, _les ébats d'un esprit en peine_, and seemed to announce
-a talent in progress of disintegration rather than of reconstruction.
-
-'Sometimes the critic's phrases seemed wet with tears; sometimes,
-abandoning his tone of commiseration, he would assume one of scientific
-indifference. The phenomenon was the commonest. There were dozens of Hubert
-Prices in London. The universities and the newspapers, working singly and
-in collaboration, turned them out by the dozen. And the mission of these
-men of intelligent culture seemed to be to _poser des lapins sur la jeune
-presse_. Each one came in turn with his little volume of poems, his little
-play, his little picture; all were men of "advanced ideas"; in other words,
-they were all _dans le mouvement_. There was the rough Hubert Price, who
-made mild consternation in the drawing-room, and there was the
-sophisticated Hubert Price, who cajoled the drawing-room; there was the
-sincere and the insincere, and the Price that suffered and the Price that
-didn't. Each one brought a different _nuance_, a thousand infinitesimal
-variations of the type, but, considered merely in its relation to art, the
-species may be said to be divided into two distinct categories. In the
-first category are those who rise almost at the first bound to a certain
-level, who produce quickly, never reaching again the original standard,
-dropping a little lower at each successive effort until their work becomes
-indistinguishable from the ordinary artistic commercialism of the time. The
-fate of those in the second category is more pathetic; they gradually
-wither and die away like flowers planted in a thin soil. Among these men
-many noble souls are to be found, men who have surrendered all things for
-love of their art, and who seemed at starting to be the best equipped to
-win, but who failed, impossible to tell how or why. Sometimes their failure
-turns to comedy, sometimes to tragedy. They may become refined, delicate,
-elderly bachelors, the ornaments of drawing-rooms, professional
-diners-out--men with brilliant careers behind them. But if fate has not
-willed that they should retire into brilliant shells; if chance does not
-allow them to retreat, to separate themselves from their kind, but
-arbitrarily joins them to others, linking their fate to the fate of others'
-unhappiness, disaster may and must accrue from the alliance; honesty of
-purpose, trueness of heart, deep love, every great, good, and gracious
-quality to be found in nature, will not suffice to save them.'
-
-The paper dropped from his hands, and he recollected all his failures.
-
-'Once I could do good work; now I can do neither good work nor bad. Were I
-a rich man, I should collect my scattered papers and write songs to be sung
-in drawing-rooms; but being a poor one, I must--I suppose I must get out.
-Positively, there is no hope,--debts on every side. Fate has willed me to
-go as went Haydon, Gerard de Nerval, and Maréchal. The first cut his
-throat, the second hanged himself, and the third blew out his brains.
-Clearly the time has come to consider how I shall make my exit. It is a
-little startling to be called upon so peremptorily to go.'
-
-In this moment of extreme dejection it seemed to Hubert that the writer of
-the article had told him the exact truth. He refused to admit the plea of
-poverty. It was of course hard to write when one is being harassed by
-creditors. But if he had had it in him, it would have come out. The critic
-had very probably told him the truth. He could not hope to make a living
-out of literature. He had not the strength to write the masterpiece which
-the perverse cruelty of nature had permitted him only to see, and he was
-hopelessly unfit for journalism. But in his simple, wholesome mind there
-was no bent towards suicide; and he scanned every horizon. Once again he
-thought of his uncle. Five years ago he had written, asking him for the
-loan of a hundred pounds. He had received ten. And how vain it would be to
-write a second time! A few pounds would only serve to prolong his misery.
-No; he would not drift from degradation to degradation.
-
-He only glanced at the letter which Annie had brought up with the copy of
-_The Modern Review_. It was clearly a lawyer's letter. Should he open it?
-Why not spare himself the pain? He could alter nothing; and in these last
-days---- Leaving the thought unfinished, he sought for his keys; he went to
-his box, unlocked it, and took out a small paper package. Of the fifty
-pounds he had received from Ford about twenty remained: he had been poorer
-before, but hardly quite so hopeless. He scanned every horizon--all were
-barred. The thought of suicide, and with it the instinctive shrinking from
-it, came into his mind again. Suppose he took, that very night, an overdose
-of chloral? He tried to put the thought from him, and returned, a little
-dazed and helpless, to his chair. Had the critic in _The Modern Review_
-told him the truth? Was he incapable of earning a living? It seemed so.
-Above all, was he incapable of finishing _The Gipsy_ as he intended? No;
-that he felt was a lie. Give him six months' quiet, free from worry and all
-anxiety, and he would do it. Many a year had passed since he had enjoyed a
-month of quiet; and glancing again at the letter on the table, he thought
-that perhaps at that very moment a score of gallery boys were hissing his
-play. Perhaps at that very moment Ford was making up his mind to announce
-the last six nights of _Divorce_. At a quarter to twelve he heard Rose's
-foot on the stairs. He opened the door.
-
-'How did the piece go to-night?'
-
-'Pretty well.'
-
-'Only pretty well? Won't you come in for a few minutes?... So the piece
-didn't go very well to-night?'
-
-'Oh yes, it did. I've seen it go better; but----'
-
-'Did you get a call?'
-
-'Yes, after the second act.'
-
-'Not after the third?'
-
-'No. That act never goes well. Harding came behind; I was speaking to him,
-and he said something which struck me as being very true. Ford, he said,
-plays the part a great deal too seriously. When the piece was first
-produced, it was played more good-humouredly by indifferent actors, who let
-the thing run without trying to bring out every point. Ford makes it as
-hard as nails. I think those were his exact words.'
-
-Hubert did not answer. At the end of a long silence he said,--
-
-'Did you hear anything about the last night's?'
-
-'No,' she said; 'I heard nothing of that.'
-
-'Ford appeared quite satisfied then?'
-
-'Yes, quite,' she answered, with difficulty; for his eyes were fixed on
-her, and she felt he knew she was not telling the truth. The conversation
-paused again, and to turn it into another channel she said, 'Why, you have
-not opened your letter!'
-
-'I can see it is a lawyer's letter, on account of some unpaid bill. If I
-could pay it, I would; but as I can't----'
-
-'You are afraid to open it,' said Rose.
-
-Ashamed of his weakness, Hubert opened the letter, and began to read. Rose
-saw that the letter was not such an one as he had expected, and a moment
-after his face told her that fortunate news had come to him. The signs of
-the tumult within were represented by the passing of the hand across the
-brow, as if to brush aside some strange hallucination, and the sudden
-coming of a vague look of surprise and fear into the eyes. He said,--
-
-'Read it! Read it!'
-
-Relieved of much detail and much cumbersome legal circumlocution, it was to
-the following effect:--That about three months ago Mr. Burnett had come up
-from his place in Sussex, and at the offices of Messrs. Grandly & Co. had
-made a will, in which he had disinherited his adopted daughter, Miss Emily
-Watson, and left everything to Mr. Hubert Price. There was no question as
-to the validity of the will; but Messrs. Grandly deemed it their duty to
-inform Mr. Hubert Price of the circumstances under which it had been made,
-and also of the fact that a few weeks before his death Mr. Burnett had told
-Mr. John Grandly, who was then staying with Mr. Burnett at Ashwood, that he
-intended adding a codicil, leaving some two or three hundred a year to Miss
-Watson. It was unfortunate that Mr. Burnett had not had time to do this;
-for Miss Watson was an orphan, eighteen years of age, and entirely
-unprovided for. Messrs. Grandly begged to submit these facts to the
-consideration of Mr. Hubert Price. Miss Watson was now residing at Ashwood.
-She was there with a friend of hers, Mrs. Bentley; and should Mr. Hubert
-Price feel inclined to do what Mr. Burnett had left undone, Messrs. Grandly
-would have very great pleasure in carrying his wishes into effect.
-
-'I'm not dreaming, am I?'
-
-'No, you are not. It is quite true. Your uncle has left his money to you. I
-am so glad; indeed I am. You will be able to finish your play, and take a
-theatre and produce it yourself if you like. I hope you won't forget me. I
-do want to play that part. You can't quite know what I shall do with it.
-One can't explain oneself in a scene here and there.... What are you
-thinking of?'
-
-'I'm thinking of that poor girl, Emily Watson. It comes very hard upon
-her.'
-
-'Who is she?'
-
-'The girl my uncle disinherited.'
-
-'Oh, she! Well, you can marry her if you like. That would not be a bad
-notion. But if you do, you'll forget all about me and Lady Hayward.'
-
-'No; I shall never forget you, Rose.' He stretched his hand to her; but,
-irrespective of his will, the gesture seemed full of farewell.
-
-'I'm so much obliged to you,' he said; 'had it not been for you, I might
-never have opened that letter.'
-
-'Even if you hadn't, it wouldn't have mattered; you would have heard of
-your good fortune some other way. But it is getting very late. I must say
-good-night. I hope you will have a pleasant time in the country, and will
-finish your play. Good-night.'
-
-Returning from the door, he stopped to think. 'We have been very good
-friends--that is all. How strangely determined she is!... More so than I
-am. She is bound to succeed. There is in her just that note of individual
-passion.... Perhaps some one will find her out before I have
-finished,--that would be a pity. I wonder which of us will succeed first?'
-
-Then the madness of good fortune came upon him suddenly; he could think no
-more of Rose, and had to go for a long walk in the streets.
-
-
-
-
-VII
-
-
-'Dearest Emily, you must prepare yourself for the worst.'
-
-'Is he dead?'
-
-'Yes; he passed away quite quietly. To look at him one would say he was
-asleep; he does not appear to have suffered at all.'
-
-'Oh, Julia, Julia, do you think he forgave me? I could not do what he asked
-me.... I loved him very dearly as a father, but I could not have married
-him.'
-
-'No, dear, you could not. Such a marriage would have been most unnatural;
-he was more than forty years older than you.'
-
-'I do not think he ever thought of such a thing until about a month or six
-weeks ago. You remember how I ran to you? I was as white as a ghost, and I
-trembled like a leaf. I could hardly speak.... You remember?'
-
-'Yes, I remember; and some hours after, when I came into this room, he was
-standing there, just there, on the hearth-rug; there was a fearful look of
-pain and despair on his face--he looked as if he was going mad. I never saw
-such a look before, and I never wish to see such a look again. And the
-effort he made to appear unconcerned when he saw me was perhaps the worst
-part of it. I pretended to see nothing, and walked away towards the window
-and looked out. But all the while I could feel that some terrible drama was
-passing behind me. At last I had to look round. He was sitting in that
-chair, his elbows on his knees, clasping his head with both hands, the old,
-gnarled fingers twined in the iron-grey hair. Then, unable to contain
-himself any longer, he rushed out of the room, out of the house, and across
-the park.'
-
-'You say that he passed away quietly; he did not seem to suffer at all?'
-
-'No, he never recovered consciousness.'
-
-'But do you think that my refusal to marry him had anything to do with his
-death?'
-
-'Oh no, Emily; a fit of apoplexy, with a man of his age, generally ends
-fatally.'
-
-'Even if I had known it all beforehand I don't think I could have acted
-differently. I could not have married him. Indeed I couldn't, Julia, not
-even if I knew I should save his life by doing so. I daresay it is very
-wicked of me, but----'
-
-'Dearest Emily, you must not give way to such thoughts; you did quite right
-in refusing to marry Mr. Burnett. It was very wrong of him even to think of
-asking you, and if he had lived he would have seen how wrong it was of him
-to desire such a thing.'
-
-'If he had lived! But then he didn't live, not even long enough to forgive
-me, and when we think of how much he suffered--I don't mean in dying, you
-say he passed away quietly, but all this last month how heart-broken he
-looked! You remember when he sat at the head of the table, never speaking
-to us, and how frightened I was lest I should meet him on the stairs; I
-used to stand at the door of my room, afraid to move. I know he suffered,
-poor old man. I was very, very sorry for him. Indeed I was, Julia, for I'm
-not selfish, and when I think now that he died without forgiving me, I
-feel, I feel--oh, I feel as if I should like to die myself. Why do such
-things happen to me? I feel just as miserable now as I used to when I lived
-with father and mother, who could not agree. I have often told you how
-miserable I was then, but I don't think you ever quite understood. I feel
-just the same now, just as if I never wanted to see any one or anything
-again. I was so unhappy when I was a child, they thought I would die, and I
-should have died if I had remained listening to father and mother any
-longer. ... Every one thought I was so lucky when Mr. Burnett decided to
-adopt me and leave me all his money, and he has done that, poor old man, so
-I suppose I should be happy; but I'm not.'
-
-The girl's eyes turned instinctively towards the window and rested for a
-moment on the fair, green prospects of the park.
-
-'I hated to listen to father and mother quarrelling, but I loved them, and
-I had not been here a year before father died, and darling mother was not
-long following him--only six months. Then I had no one: a few distant
-relatives, whom I knew nothing of, whom I did not care for, so I gave all
-my love to Mr. Burnett. He was so good to me; he never denied me anything;
-he gave me everything, even you, dearest Julia. When he thought I wanted a
-companion, he found you for me. I learnt to love you. You became my best
-and dearest friend. Then things seemed to brighten up, and I thought I was
-happy, when all this dreadful trouble came upon us. Don't let's speak of it
-more than we can help. I often wished myself dead. Didn't you, Julia?'
-
-Emily Watson told the story of her misfortunes in a low, musical voice,
-heedless of two or three interruptions, hardly conscious of her listener,
-impressed and interested by the fatality of circumstances which she
-believed in design against her. She was a small, slender girl of about
-eighteen. Her abundant chestnut hair--exquisite, soft, and silky--was
-looped picturesquely, and fastened with a thin tortoiseshell comb. The tiny
-mouth trembled, and the large, prominent eyes reflected a strange, yearning
-soul. She was dressed in white muslin, and the fantastically small waist
-was confined with a white band. Her friend and companion, Julia Bentley,
-was a woman of about thirty, well above the medium height, full-bosomed and
-small-waisted. The type was Anglo-Saxon even to commonplace. The face was
-long, with a look of instinctive kindness upon it. She was given to
-staring, and as she looked at Emily, her blue eyes filled with an
-expression which told of a nature at once affectionate and intelligent. She
-was dressed in yellow linen, and wore a gold bracelet on a well-turned arm.
-
-The room was a long, old-fashioned drawing-room. It had three windows, and
-all three were filled with views of the park, now growing pale in the
-evening air. The flower-gardens were drawn symmetrically about the house
-and were set with blue flower-vases in which there were red geraniums. It
-was a very large room, nearly forty feet long, with old portraits on the
-walls--ugly things and ill done; and where there were no portraits the
-walls were decorated with vine leaves and mountains. The parqueted floor
-was partially covered with skins, and the furniture seemed to have known
-many a generation; some of it was heavy and cumbersome, some of it was
-modern. There was a grand piano, and above it two full-length portraits--a
-lady in a blue dress and a man in black velvet knee-breeches. At the end of
-a long silence, Emily suddenly threw herself weeping into Julia's arms.
-
-'Oh, you are my only friend; you will not leave me now.... We shall always
-love one another, shall we not? If anything ever came between us it would
-kill me.... That poor old man lying dead up-stairs! He loved me very
-dearly, and I loved him, too. Yet I said just now I could not have married
-him even if I had known it would save his life. I was wrong; yes, I would
-have married him if I had known.... You don't believe me?'
-
-'My dearest girl, you must try to forget that Mr. Burnett ever entertained
-so foolish a thought. He was a very good man, and loved you for a long time
-as he should have loved you--as a daughter. We shall respect his memory
-best by forgetting the events of the last six weeks. And now, Emily, dinner
-will be ready at seven o'clock, and it is now six. What are you going to
-do?'
-
-'I shall go out for a little walk. I shall go down and see the swans.'
-
-'Shall I come with you?'
-
-'No, thank you, dear; I think I'd sooner be alone. I want to think.'
-
-Julia looked a moment anxiously at this fragile girl, whose tiny head was
-poised on a long, delicate neck like a fruit on its stem.
-
-'Yes, go for a walk, dear,' said Julia; 'it will do you good. Shall I go
-and fetch your hat and jacket?'
-
-'No, thank you, I will not trouble you; I'll go myself.'
-
-'No, Emily, I think you had better let me go.'
-
-'Oh, no; I am not afraid.'
-
-And she went up the wide oak staircase, thinking of the man who lay dead in
-the room at the end of the passage. She was conscious of a sense of dread;
-the house seemed to wear a strange air, and her dog, Dandy, was conscious
-of it, too; he was more silent, less joyful than usual. And when she came
-from her room, dressed to go out, instead of rushing down-stairs, barking
-with joy, he dropped his tail and lingered at the end of the passage. She
-called him; he still hesitated, and then, yielding to a sudden desire, she
-went down the passage and knocked at the door of the room. The nurse
-answered her knock.
-
-'Oh, don't come in, miss.'
-
-'Why not? I want to see him before he goes away for ever.'
-
-Upon the limp, white curtains of an old four-posted bed she saw the
-memorable profile--stern, unrelenting. How still he lay! Never would that
-face speak or laugh or see again. Although sixty-five, his head was covered
-with short, thick, iron-grey hair; the beard, too, was short and thick, and
-iron-grey. The face was rugged, and when Emily touched the coarse hand,
-telling of a life of toil, she started--it was singularly cold. Fear and
-sorrow in like measure choked her, and her soul awoke, and tremblingly she
-walked out of the house, glad to breathe the sweet evening air.
-
-She walked towards the artificial water. The sky was melancholy and grey,
-and the park lay before her, hushed and soundless. Through the shadows of
-the darkening island two swans floated softly, leaving behind slight silver
-lines; above, the swallows flew high in the evening. There was sensation of
-death, too, in this cold, mournful water, and in the silence that hung
-about it, and in some vague way it reminded Emily of her own life. She had
-known little else but death; her life seemed full of death; and those
-reflections, so distinct and so colourless, were like death.
-
-Then, in a sudden expansion of youth she wondered. Her own life, how
-strange, how personal, how intense! What did it mean, what meaning had it
-in the great, wide world? And the impressive tranquillity, the pale death
-of the day, lying like a flower on the water, seemed to symbolise her
-thought, and she felt more distinctly than she had ever done before. And
-there arose in her a nervous and passionate interest in herself. She seemed
-so strange, so wonderful. Her childhood was in itself an enigma. That sad
-and sorrowful childhood of hers, passed in that old London house; her
-mother's love for her; her cruel, stern stepfather, and the endless
-quarrels between her father and mother, which made her young life so
-unbearable, so wretched, that she could never think of those years without
-tears rising to her eyes. And then the going away, coming to live with Mr.
-Burnett! The death of her father and her dear mother, so sudden, following
-so soon one after the other. How much there had been in her life, how
-wonderful it was! Her love of Mr. Burnett, and then that bitter and
-passionate change in him! That proposal of marriage; could she ever forget
-it? And then this cruel and sudden death. Everything she had ever loved had
-been taken from her. Only Julia remained, and should Julia be taken from
-her, she felt that she must die. But that would not, could not, happen. She
-was now mistress of Ashwood, she was a great heiress; and she and Julia
-would live always together, they would always love one another, they would
-always live here in this beautiful place which they loved so well.
-
-
-
-
-VIII
-
-
-There were at the funeral a few personal friends who lived in the
-neighbourhood, the farmers on the estate, and the labourers; and when the
-little crowd separated outside the church, Emily and Julia walked back to
-Ashwood with Mr. Grandly, Mr. Burnett's intimate friend and solicitor. They
-returned through the park, hardly speaking at all, Emily absent-minded as
-usual, waving her parasol occasionally at a passing butterfly. The grass
-was warm and beautiful to look on, and they lingered, prolonging the walk.
-It was very good of Mr. Grandly to accompany them back; he might have gone
-on straight to the station, so Julia thought, and she was surprised indeed
-when, instead of bidding them good-bye at the front door, he said--
-
-'Before I return to London I have a communication to make to both you
-ladies. Will it suit you to come into the drawing-room with me?'
-
-'Perfectly, so far as I'm concerned; and you, Emily?'
-
-'Oh, I've nothing to do; but if it is about business, Julia will
-attend----'
-
-'I think you had better be present, Miss Watson.'
-
-Mr. Grandly was a tall, massive man with benevolent features; his bald,
-pink skull was partly covered with one lock of white hair. There was an
-anxious look in his pale, deep-set eyes which impressed Julia, and she
-said: 'I hope this communication you have to make to us is not of a painful
-nature. We have----'
-
-'Yes, Mrs. Bentley, I know that you have been severely tried lately, but
-there is no help for it. I cannot keep you in ignorance any longer of
-certain facts relating to Mr. Burnett's will.' The words 'will' and 'facts'
-struck on Emily's ear. She had been thinking about her fortune. The very
-ground she was walking on was hers. She was the owner of this beautiful
-park; it seemed like a fairy tale. And that house, that dear, old-fashioned
-house, that rambling, funny old place of all sizes and shapes, full of deep
-staircases and pictures, was hers. Her eyes wandered along the smooth wide
-drive, down to the placid water crossed by the great ornamental bridge, the
-island where she had watched the swans floating last night--all these
-things were hers. So the words 'will' and 'facts' and 'ignorance of them'
-jarred her clutching little dream, and she turned her eyes--they wore an
-anxious look--towards Mr. Grandly, and said with an authoritative air:
-'Yes, let us go into the drawing-room; I want to hear what Mr. Grandly has
-to say about----Let us go into the drawing-room at once.'
-
-Julia took the chair nearest to her. Emily stood at the window, waiting
-impatiently for Mr. Grandly to begin. He laid his hat on the parquet, wiped
-his forehead with his handkerchief, and drew an arm-chair forward. 'Mr.
-Burnett, as you know, made a will some years ago, in favour of his cousin
-and adopted daughter, Miss Emily Watson. In that will he left his entire
-fortune to her, Ashwood Park and all his invested money. No other person
-was mentioned in that will, except Miss Watson. It was I who drew up this
-will. I remember discussing its provisions with Mr. Burnett, and advising
-him to leave something, even if it were only a few hundred pounds, to his
-nephew, Hubert Price. But Mr. Burnett was always a very headstrong man; he
-had quarrelled with this young man, as he said, irreparably, and could not
-be induced to leave him even a hundred pounds. I thought this was harsh,
-and as Mr. Burnett's friend I told him so--I have always been opposed to
-extreme measures,--but he was not to be gainsaid. So the matter remained
-for many years; never did Mr. Burnett mention his nephew's name. I thought
-he had forgotten the young man's existence, when, suddenly, without
-warning, Mr. Burnett came into my office and told me that he intended to
-alter his will, leaving all his property to his nephew, Hubert Price. You
-know what old friends we were, and, presuming on our friendship, I told him
-what I thought of his project of disinheritance, for it amounted to that.
-Well, suffice it to say, we very nearly quarrelled over the matter. I
-refused to draw up the will, so iniquitous did it seem to me. He said:
-"Very well, Grandly, I'll go elsewhere." Then I remembered that if I
-allowed him to go elsewhere I should lose all hold over him, and I
-consented to draw up the will.'
-
-Emily listened, a vague expression of pain in her pathetic eyes. Then this
-house, this room where she was sitting, was not hers, and a strange man
-would come soon and drive her away!
-
-'And he has left Ashwood to Mr. Price, is not that his name?' she said,
-abruptly.
-
-'Yes; he has left Ashwood to Mr. Price.'
-
-'And when did he make this new will?'
-
-'I think it is just about a month ago.'
-
-Emily leaned forward, and her great eyes, full of light and sorrow, were
-fixed in space, her little pale hands linked, and the great mass of
-chestnut hair slipping from the comb. She was, in truth, at that moment the
-subject of a striking picture, and she was even more impressive when she
-said, speaking slowly: 'Then that old man was even wickeder than I thought.
-Oh, what I have learned in the last three or four weeks! Oh, what
-wickedness, what wickedness!... But go on,' she said, looking at Mr.
-Grandly; 'tell me all.'
-
-'I suppose there was some very serious reason, but on that point Mr.
-Burnett absolutely refused to answer me. He said his reasons were his own,
-and that he intended to leave his money to whom he pleased.'
-
-'There was----' Julia stopped short, and looked interrogatively at Emily.
-
-'Go on, Julia, tell him; we have nothing to conceal.'
-
-'Mr. Burnett asked Emily to marry him a short time ago; she, of course,
-refused, and ever since he seemed more like----'
-
-'A madman than anything else,' broke in Emily. 'Oh, for the last month we
-have led a miserable life! It was a happy release.'
-
-'Is it possible,' said Mr. Grandly, 'that Mr. Burnett seriously
-contemplated marriage with Miss Watson?'
-
-'Yes, and her refusal seemed to drive him out of his mind.'
-
-'I never was more surprised.' The placid face of the eminently respectable
-solicitor lapsed into contemplation. 'I often tried,' he said, suddenly,
-'to divine the reason why he changed his will. Disappointed love seemed the
-only conceivable reason, but I rejected it as being quite inconceivable.
-Well, it only shows how little we know what is passing in each other's
-minds.'
-
-'Then,' said Julia, 'Mr. Burnett has divided his fortune, leaving Ashwood
-to Mr. Price, and all his invested money to Emily?'
-
-A look of pain passed over Mr. Grandly's benevolent face, and he answered:
-'Unfortunately he has left everything to Mr. Price.'
-
-'I'm glad,' exclaimed Emily, 'that he has left me nothing. Once he thought
-fit to disinherit me because I would not marry him, I prefer not to have
-anything to do with his money.'
-
-Mr. Grandly and Julia looked at each other; they did not need to speak;
-each knew that the girl did not realise at once the full and irretrievable
-nature of this misfortune. The word 'destitute' was at present unrealised,
-and she only thought that she had been deprived of what she loved best in
-the world--Ashwood. Mr. Grandly glanced at her, and then speaking a little
-more hurriedly, said--
-
-'I was saying just now that I only consented to draw up the will so that I
-might be able at some future time to induce Mr. Burnett to add a codicil to
-it. Later on I spoke to him again on the subject, and he promised to
-consider it, and a few days after he wrote to me, saying that he had
-decided to take my advice and add a codicil. Subsequently, in another
-letter he mentioned three hundred a year as being the sum he thought he
-would be in honour bound to leave Miss Watson. Unfortunately, he did not
-live long enough to carry this intention into execution. But the letters he
-addressed to me on the subject exist, and I have every hope that the heir,
-Mr. Price, will be glad to make some provision for his cousin.'
-
-'Have you any reason for thinking that Mr. Price will do so?' said Julia.
-
-'No. But it seems impossible for any honourable man to act otherwise.'
-
-'He cannot bear enmity against Emily, who of course knew nothing of his
-quarrel with his uncle. Do you know anything about Mr. Price? What is he?
-Where does he live?'
-
-'He is a literary man, I believe. I have heard that he writes plays!'
-
-'Oh, a writer of plays.'
-
-'Yes. I am glad of it; he may be easier to deal with. I daresay it is a
-mistaken notion, but one is apt to imagine that these artist folk are more
-generous with their money than ordinary mortals.'
-
-'Is he married?' said Julia, and involuntarily she glanced toward Emily.
-
-Mr. Grandly, too, looked toward the girl, and then he said: 'I don't know
-if Mr. Price is married; I hope not.'
-
-'Why do you hope so?' said Emily, suddenly.
-
-'Because if he isn't, there will only be one person to deal with. If he had
-a wife, she would have a voice in the matter; and in such circumstances as
-ours a man is easier to deal with. I earnestly hope Mr. Hubert Price is not
-married, and shall consider it a great point in our favour if on returning
-to town I find he is not.' Then assuming a lighter tone, for the nervous
-strain of the last ten minutes had been intense, he said: 'If he is not
-married, who knows--you may take a fancy to him, and he to you; then things
-would be just the same as before--only better.'
-
-'I should not marry him--I hate him already. I wonder how you can think of
-such a thing, Mr. Grandly? You know that he must be a very wicked man for
-uncle to have disinherited him. I have always heard that--but I don't know
-what I am saying.' Tears welled up into her eyes. 'I daresay my cousin is
-not so bad as--but I can talk no more.... I am very miserable, I have
-always been miserable, and I don't know why; I never did harm to any one.'
-
-Soon after Mr. Grandly bade the ladies good-bye. Julia followed him to the
-front door. 'You will do all you can to help us? That poor child is too
-young, too inexperienced, to realise what her position is.'
-
-'I know, I know,' said Mr. Grandly, extending both hands to Julia; 'in the
-whole course of my experience I never met with a sadder case. But we must
-not take too sad a view of it. Perhaps all will come right in the end. The
-young man cannot refuse to make good his uncle's intentions. He cannot see
-his cousin go to the workhouse. I will do the best I can for you. The
-moment I get back to London, I'll set inquiries on foot and find out his
-address, and when I have seen him I'll write. Good-bye.'
-
-Then, resolving that it were better to leave the girl to herself, Julia
-took up her key-basket and hurried away on household business. But in the
-middle of her many occupations she would now and then stop short to think.
-She had never heard of anything so cruel before. That poor girl--she must
-go to her; she must not leave her alone any longer. But it would be well to
-avoid the subject as much as possible. She must think of something to
-distract her thoughts. The pony-chaise. It might be the last time they had
-a carriage to go out in. But they could not go out driving on the day of
-the funeral.
-
-That evening, as they were going to bed, Emily said, lifting her sweet,
-pathetic little face, looking all love and gentleness: 'Oh, to think of a
-common, vulgar writer coming here, with a common, vulgar wife and a horrid
-crowd of children. Oh, Julia, doesn't it seem impossible? And yet I suppose
-it is true. I cannot bear to think of it. I can see the horrid children
-tramping up and down the stairs, breaking the things we have known and
-loved so long; and they will destroy all my flowers, and no one will
-remember to feed the poor swans. Dandy, my beloved, I shall be able to take
-you with me.' And she caught up the rough-haired terrier and hugged him,
-kissing his dear old head. 'Dandy is mine; they can't take him from me, can
-they? But do you think the swans belong to them or to us? I suppose it
-would be impossible to take them with us if we go to live in London. They
-couldn't live in a backyard.'
-
-'But, dearest Emily, who are "they"? You don't know that he is
-married--literary men don't often marry. For all you know, he is a handsome
-young man, who will fall madly in love with you.'
-
-'No one ever fell in love with me except that horrid old man--how I hate
-him, how I detest to think of it! I thought I should have died when he
-asked to marry me. The very memory of it is enough to make me hate all men,
-and prevent me from liking any one. I don't think I could like him; I
-should always see that wicked old man's hoary, wrinkled face in his.'
-
-'Oh, Emily, I cannot think how such ideas can come into your head. It is
-not right, indeed it isn't.' And this simple Englishwoman looked at this
-sensitive girl in sheer wonderment and alarm.
-
-'I only say what I think. I am glad the old man did disinherit me. I'm glad
-we are leaving Ashwood; I cannot abide the place when I think of him....
-There, that is his chair. I can see him sitting in it now. He is grinning
-at us; he is saying, "Ha! ha! I have made beggars of you both." You
-remember how we used to tremble when we met his terrible old face on the
-stairs; you remember how he used to sit glaring at us all through dinner?'
-
-'Yes, Emily, I remember all that; but I do not think it natural that you
-should forget all the years of kindness; he was very good to you, and loved
-you very much, and if he forgot himself at the end of his life, we must
-remember the weakness of age.'
-
-'The hideousness of age,' Emily replied, in a low tone. The conversation
-paused, and then Julia said--
-
-'You are speaking wildly, Emily, and will live to regret your words. Let us
-speak no more of Mr. Burnett... I daresay you will find your cousin a
-charming young man. I should laugh if it were all to end in a marriage. And
-how glad I should be to see you off on your honeymoon, to bid you
-good-bye!'
-
-'Oh, Julia, don't speak like that; you will never bid me good-bye. You will
-never leave me--promise me that--you are my only friend. Oh, Julia, promise
-me that you will never leave me.'
-
-Tears rose in Julia's eyes, and taking the girl in her arms, she said,
-'I'll never leave you, my dear girl, until you yourself wish it.'
-
-'I wish it? Oh, Julia, you do not know me. I have lost everything, Julia,
-but I mustn't lose you... After all, it doesn't so much matter, so long as
-we are not separated. I don't care about money, and we can have a nice
-little house in London all to ourselves. And if we get too hard up, we'll
-both go out as daily governesses. I think I could teach a little music, to
-young children, you know; you'd teach the older ones.' Emily looked at
-Julia inquiringly, and going over to the piano, attempted to play her
-favourite polka. Julia, who had once worked for her daily bread, and earned
-it in a sort of way by giving music-lessons, smiled sadly at the girl's
-ignorance of life.
-
-'I see,' said Emily, who was quick to divine every shade of sentiment
-passing in the minds of those she loved; 'you don't think I could teach
-even the little children.'
-
-'My dear Emily, I hope it will never come to your having to try.'
-
-'I must do something to get a living,' she replied, looking vaguely and
-wistfully into the fire. 'How unfortunate all this is--that horrid, horrid
-old man. But supposing he had asked you to marry him--he wasn't nice, but
-you are older than I, and if you had married him you would have become, in
-a way, my stepmother. But what a charming stepmother! Oh, how I should have
-loved that!'
-
-'Come, Emily, it is time to go to bed; you let your imagination run away
-with you.'
-
-'Julia, you are not cross because----'
-
-'No, dear, I'm not cross. I'm only a little tired. We have talked too
-long.'
-
-Emily's allusion to music-teaching had revived in Julia all her most
-painful memories. If this man were to cast them penniless out of Ashwood!
-Supposing, supposing that were to happen? Starving days, pale and haggard,
-rose up in her memory. What should she do, what should she do, and with
-that motherless girl dependent on her for food and clothes and shelter? She
-buried her face in the pillow and prayed that she might be saved from such
-a destiny.
-
-If this man--this unknown creature--were to refuse to help them, she and
-Emily would have to go to London, and she would have to support Emily as
-best she might. She would hold to her and fight for her with all her
-strength, but would she not fall vanquished in the fight; and then, and
-then? The same thoughts, questions, and fears turned in her head like a
-wheel, and it was not until dawn had begun to whiten the window-panes that
-she fell asleep.
-
-A few days after, the post brought a letter for Julia. After glancing
-hastily down the page she said: 'This is a letter from Mr. Grandly, and it
-is good news. Oh, what a relief!...'
-
-'Read it.'
-
-'"Dear Mrs. Bentley,--Immediately I arrived in London, I set to work to
-find out Mr. Price's address. It was the easiest matter in the world, for
-he has a play now running at one of the theatres. So I directed my letter
-to the theatre, and next morning I had a visit from him. After explaining
-to him the resources of the brilliant fortune he had come into, I told him
-of his uncle's intention to add a codicil to his will, leaving Miss Watson
-three hundred a year; I told him that this last will had left her entirely
-unprovided for. He said, at once, that he fully agreed with me, and that he
-would consider what was the most honourable course for him to take in
-regard to his 'cousin. This is exactly what he said, but his manner was
-such that before leaving he left no doubt in my mind whatever that he will
-act very generously indeed. I should not be surprised if he settled even
-more than the proposed three hundred a year on Miss Watson. He is a very
-quiet, thoughtful young man of about two or three and thirty. He looks
-poor, and I fancy he has lived through very hard times. He wears an air of
-sadness and disappointment which makes him attractive, and his manners are
-gentle and refined. I tell you these things, for I know they will interest
-you. I have not been able to find out if he is married, but I am sorry to
-say that his play has not succeeded. I should have found out more, but he
-was not in my office above ten minutes; he had to hurry away to keep an
-appointment at the theatre, for, as he explained, it was to be decided that
-very day if the play was to be taken out of the bills at the end of the
-week. He promised to call again, and our interview is fixed for eleven
-o'clock the day after to-morrow. In the meantime take heart, for I think I
-am justified in telling you I feel quite sanguine as to the result."'
-
-'Well,' said Julia, laying down the letter, 'I don't think that anything
-could be more satisfactory, and just fancy dear old Mr. Grandly being able
-to describe a young man as well as that.'
-
-'He doesn't say if he is short or tall, or dark or fair.'
-
-'No, he doesn't. I think he might have told us something about his personal
-appearance, but it is a great relief to hear that he is not the vulgar
-Bohemian we have always understood him to be. Mr. Grandly says his manners
-are refined; you might take a fancy to him after all.'
-
-'But you don't know that he isn't married. I suppose Mr. Grandly wasn't
-able to find that out. I should like to know--but not because I want to
-marry him or any one else; only I don't like the idea of a great, vulgar
-woman, and a pack of children scampering about the place when we go.'
-
-'Do you dislike children so much, then, Emily?'
-
-'I don't know that I ever thought about them; but I'm sure I shouldn't like
-his children. I dreamt of him last night. Do you believe in dreams?'
-
-'What did you dream?'
-
-'I cannot remember, but I woke up crying, feeling more unhappy than I ever
-felt in my life before. It is curious that I should dream of him last
-night, and that you should receive that letter this morning, isn't it?'
-
-'I don't see anything strange in it. Nothing more natural than that you
-should dream about him, and it was certain that I should receive a letter
-from Mr. Grandly; he promised to write to me in a few days.'
-
-'Then you believe what is in that letter--I don't. Something tells me that
-he will not act kindly, but I don't know how.'
-
-'I'm quite sure you are wrong, Emily. Mr. Grandly would never have written
-this letter unless he knew for certain that Mr. Price would do all or more
-than he promised.'
-
-'I can't see from the letter that he has promised anything... Even if he
-does give me three hundred a year, I shall have to leave Ashwood.'
-
-'My dear Emily, I'm cross with you: of course, if you will insist on always
-looking at the melancholy side.... Now I'm going; I've to see after the
-housekeeping. Are you going into the garden?'
-
-'Yes, presently.'
-
-Emily did not seem to know what she was going to do. She looked out of the
-window, she lingered in the corridor; finally she wandered into the
-library. The quaint, old-fashioned room recalled her childhood to her. It
-was here she used to learn her lessons. Here was the mahogany table, at
-which she used to sit with her governess, learning to read and write; and
-there, far away at the other end of the long room, was the round table,
-where lay the old illustrated editions of _Gulliver's Travels_ and _The
-Arabian Nights_, which she used to run to whenever her governess left the
-room. And at the bottom of the book-cases there were drawers full of
-strange papers; these drawers she used to open in fear and trembling, so
-mysterious did they seem to her. And there was the book-cases full of the
-tall folios, behind which lay, in dark and dim recesses, stores of books
-which she used to pull out, expecting at every moment to come upon
-long-forgotten treasures. She smiled now, as she recalled these childish
-imaginings, and lifting tenderly the coarse drugget, she looked at the
-great green globe which her fingers used to turn in infantile curiosity.
-
-Then leaving the library, she roamed through the house, pausing on the
-first landing to gaze on the picture of the fine gentleman in a red coat,
-his hand for ever on his sword. She remembered how she used to wonder whom
-he was going to kill, and how sure she used to feel that at last he would
-grant his adversary his life. And close by was the picture of the
-wind-mill, set on the edge of the down, with the shepherd driving sheep in
-the foreground. Her whole life seemed drenched with tears at the thought of
-parting with these things. Every room was full of memories for her. She was
-a little girl when she came to live at Ashwood, and the room at the top of
-the stairs had been her nursery. There were the two beds; both were now
-dismantled and bare. It was in the little bed in the corner that she used
-to sleep; it was in the old four-poster that her nurse slept. And there was
-the very place, in front of the fire, where she used to have her tea. The
-table had disappeared, and the grate, how rusty it was! In the far corner,
-by the window, there used to be a press, in which nurse kept tea and sugar.
-That press had been removed. The other press was there still, and throwing
-open the doors she surveyed the shelves. She remembered the very peg on
-which her hat and jacket used to hang. And the long walks in the great
-park, which was to her, then, a world of wonderment!
-
-She wandered about the old corridor, in and out of odd rooms, all
-associated with her childhood--quaint old rooms, many of them lumber rooms,
-full of odd corners and old cupboards, the meaning of which she used to
-strive to divine. How their silence and mystery used to thrill her little
-soul! Faded rooms whose mystery had departed, but whose gloom was haunted
-with tenderest recollections. In one corner was the reading-chair in which
-Mr. Burnett used to sit. At that time she used to sit on his knee, and when
-the chair gave way beneath their weight, he had said she was too big a girl
-to sit on his knee any longer. The words had seemed to her a little cruel.
-She had forgotten the old chair, but now she remembered the very moment
-when the servants came to take it away.
-
-Under the window were some fragments of a china bowl which she had broken
-when quite a little child. There was a hoop-stick and the hoop which had
-been taken down to the blacksmith's to be mended. He had mended it, but she
-did not remember ever using it again. And there was an old box of
-water-colours, with which she used to colour all the uncoloured drawings in
-her picture-books. Emily took the hoop-stick, the old doll, and the broken
-box of water-colours, and packed them away carefully. She would be able to
-find room for them in the little house in London where she and Julia were
-going to live.
-
-A few days after, the post brought letters from Mr. Grandly, one for Emily
-and one for Julia. Julia's letter ran as follows:
-
-'Dear Mrs. Bentley,---I write by this post to Miss Watson, advising her
-that her cousin, Mr. Price, is most anxious to make her acquaintance, and
-asking her to send the dog-cart to-morrow to meet him at the station. I
-must take upon myself the responsibility for this step. I have seen Mr.
-Price again, and he has confirmed me in my good opinion of him. He seems
-most anxious, not only to do everything right, but to make matters as
-pleasant and agreeable as possible for his cousin. He has written me a
-letter recognising Miss Watson's claim upon him, and constituting himself
-her trustee. I have not had yet time to prepare a deed of gift, but there
-can be little doubt that Miss Watson's position is now quite secure. So far
-so good; but more than ever does the only clear and satisfactory way out of
-this miserable business seem to me to be a marriage between Mr. Hubert
-Price and Miss Watson. I have already told you that he is a nice, refined
-young man, of gentlemanly bearing, good presence, and excellent speech,
-though a trifle shy and reserved; and, as I have since discovered that he
-is not married, I have taken upon myself the responsibility of advising him
-to jump into a train and to go and tell his cousin the conclusion he has
-come to regarding the will of the late Mr. Burnett. As I have said, he is a
-shy man, and it was some time before I could induce him to take so decisive
-a step; he wanted to meet Miss Watson in my office, but I succeeded in
-persuading him. He will go down to you to-morrow by the five o'clock, and I
-need not impress upon you the necessity that you should use your influence
-with Miss Watson, and that his reception should be as cordial as
-circumstances permit. I have only to add that I see no need that you should
-show this letter to Miss Watson, for the very fact of knowing that we
-desired to bring about a marriage might prejudice her against this young
-man, whom she otherwise cannot fail to find charming.'
-
-Hearing some one at her door, Julia put the letter away. It was Emily.
-
-'I've just received a letter from Mr. Grandly, saying that that man is
-coming here to-day, and that we are to send the dog-cart for him.'
-
-'Is not that the very best thing that----'
-
-'We cannot remain here, we must leave a note for him, or something of that
-kind. I wouldn't remain here to meet him for worlds. I really couldn't,
-Julia.'
-
-'And why not, Emily?'
-
-'To meet the man who is coming to turn me out of Ashwood!'
-
-'How do you know that he is coming to turn you out of Ashwood? You imagine
-these things.... Do you suppose that Mr. Grandly would send him down here
-if he did not know what his intentions were?'
-
-'But we shall have to leave Ashwood.'
-
-'Very likely, but not in the way you imagine. Remember, Mr. Price is your
-cousin; you may like him very much. Let's be guided by Mr. Grandly; I have
-not seen your letter, but apparently he advises us to remain here and
-receive him.'
-
-'I don't think I can, Julia. I have misgivings.'
-
-'Have you been dreaming again?'
-
-'No; I've not been dreaming, but I have misgivings.'
-
-'You are a silly little goose, Emily. Come and give me a kiss, and promise
-to take my advice.'
-
-'Dearest Julia, you do love me, don't you? Promise me that we shall not be
-separated, and then I don't mind.'
-
-'Yes, dear, I promise you that, and you will promise me to try to like your
-cousin?'
-
-'I'll try, Julia, but I'm awfully frightened, and--I don't think I could
-like him, no matter what he was like. I feel a sort of hatred in my heart.
-Don't you know what I mean?' And the girl looked questioningly into her
-friend's eyes.
-
-
-
-
-IX
-
-
-'I am Miss Watson,' she said in her low musical voice, 'and this is my
-friend, Mrs. Bentley.' Hubert bowed, and sought for words. He found none,
-and the irritating silence was broken again by Miss Watson. 'Won't you sit
-down?' she said.
-
-'Thank you.' He pulled off his gloves. The pained, troubled look which he
-had met in Miss Watson's face seemed a reproach, and he regretted not
-having followed his own idea, and invited the young lady to meet him at Mr.
-Grandly's office. He glanced nervously from one lady to the other.
-
-'I hope you have had a pleasant journey, Mr. Price,' said Mrs. Bentley.
-'The country is looking very beautiful just at present. Do you know this
-part of the country?' Mrs. Bentley's words were very welcome, and Hubert
-replied eagerly--
-
-'No; I do not know the country at all well. I have been very little out of
-London for some years, but I hope now to see more of the country. This is a
-beautiful place.'
-
-At that moment he met Mrs. Bentley's eyes, and, feeling that he was
-touching on delicate ground, he stopped speaking. When he turned his head,
-he met Miss Watson's great sad eyes, which seemed to absorb the entire
-face, fixed upon him. They expressed such depth of pathetic appeal that he
-trembled with apprehension, and the instinct in him was to beg for pardon.
-But it became suddenly necessary to say something, and, speaking at random,
-his head full of whirling words, he said--
-
-'Of course nothing could be more sad than my poor uncle's death,--so
-unexpected... Having lived so long together, you must have----' Then it was
-Hubert's turn to look appealingly at Miss Watson; but her great eyes seemed
-to say, 'Go on, go on; heap cruelty on cruelty!' Then he plunged
-desperately, hoping to retrieve his mistakes. 'He died about a month ago.
-Mr. Grandly told me I should still find you here, so I thought----'
-
-The intensity of his emotion perhaps caused Hubert to accentuate his words,
-so that they conveyed a meaning different from that which he intended.
-Certainly his hesitations were capable of misinterpretation, and Miss
-Watson said, her voice trembling,--
-
-'Of course we know we have no right here, we are intruding; but we are
-making preparations.... I daresay that to-morrow we shall be able to----'
-
-'Oh, I beg pardon, Miss Watson; let me assure you ... I am sorry if----'
-
-Taking a little handkerchief out of her black dress, Emily covered her face
-in her thin, tiny hands. She sobbed aloud, and ran out of the room. Hubert
-turned to Mrs. Bentley, his face full of consternation.
-
-'I am very sorry, but she did not give me time to speak. Will you go and
-fetch her, Mrs. Bentley? I want to tell her I hope she will never leave
-Ashwood. ... I believe she thinks that I came down here to ask her to leave
-as soon as possible. It is really quite awful that she should think such a
-thing.'
-
-'She is an exceedingly sensitive girl, and is now a little overwrought. The
-events of the last month have proved too much for her.'
-
-'Mr. Grandly informed me that it was Mr. Burnett's intention to add a
-codicil to his will, leaving Miss Watson three hundred a year. This money I
-am prepared to give her, and I'm quite sure she is welcome to stay here as
-long as she pleases. Indeed, she will do me a great favour by remaining.
-Please go and tell her. I cannot bear to see a girl cry; to hear her sob
-like that is quite terrible.'
-
-'You will be able to tell her yourself during the course of the evening. I
-think it will come better from you.'
-
-'After what has happened, it will be very difficult for me to meet her
-until she is informed that she is mistaken. I charged Mr. Grandly to
-explain everything in his letter. Apparently he omitted to do so.'
-
-'He only said you wanted to see Emily on a matter of business. Of course we
-did not expect such generosity.'
-
-They were standing quite close together, and suddenly Hubert became
-conscious of Mrs. Bentley's beauty. Her blue eyes were at that moment full
-of tender admiration for the instinctive generosity which Hubert so
-unwittingly exhibited, and her eyes told what was passing in her soul.
-Suddenly they both seemed to understand each other better, and, playing
-with the bracelet on her arm, she said--
-
-'You do not know Emily; she is strangely sensitive. But I will go and try
-to persuade her to return.... Although only distantly related, you are
-cousins, after all--are you not?'
-
-'Yes, we are cousins, but the relationship is remote. Tell her everything;
-beg of her to come down-stairs.'
-
-Hubert imagined Emily's little black figure thrown upon her bed, sobbing
-convulsively. He was very much agitated, and looked about the room, at
-first hardly seeing it. At last its novelty drew his thoughts from his
-cousin's tears, and he wondered what was the history of the house. 'The old
-man,' he thought, 'bought it all, furniture and ancestors, from some ruined
-landowner, and attempted very few alterations--that's clear.' Then he
-reproached himself. 'How could I have been so stupid? I did not know what I
-was saying. I was so horribly nervous. Those strange eyes of hers quite
-upset me. I do hope Mrs. Bentley will tell her that I wish to act
-generously, that I am prepared to do everything in my power to make her
-happy. Poor little thing! She looks as if she had never been happy.' Again
-the room drew Hubert's thoughts away from his cousin. It was still lit with
-the faint perfumed glow of the sunset. The paint of the old decorations was
-cracked and faded. A man in a plum-coloured coat with gold facings fixed
-his eyes upon him, and the tall lady in blue satin had no doubt played
-there in short clothes. He walked up and down, he turned over the music on
-the piano, and, hearing a step, looked round. It was only the servant
-coming to tell him that his room was ready.
-
-He dressed for dinner, hoping to find the two ladies in the drawing-room,
-and it was a disappointment to find only Mrs. Bentley there.
-
-'I have told Emily everything you said. She is very grateful, and begs of
-me to thank you for your kind intentions. But I am afraid you must excuse
-her absence from dinner. I really don't think she is in a fit state to come
-down; she couldn't possibly take part in the conversation.'
-
-'But why? I hope she isn't ill? Had we better send for the doctor?'
-
-'Oh no; she'll be all right in the morning. She has been crying. She
-suffers from depression of spirits. She is, I assure you, all right,' said
-Mrs. Bentley, replying to Hubert's alarmed and questioning face. 'I assure
-you there is no need for you to reproach yourself. Dinner is ready.' She
-took his arm, and they went into the dining-room.
-
-No further mention was made of Mr. Burnett, of money matters, or of the
-young lady up-stairs; and with considerable tact Mrs. Bentley introduced
-the subject of literature, alluding gracefully to Hubert's position as a
-dramatist.
-
-'Your play, _Divorce_, is now running at the Queen's Theatre?'
-
-No; I'm sorry to say it was taken out of the bills last Saturday. Saturday
-night was the last performance.'
-
-'That was not a long run. And the papers spoke so favourably of it.'
-
-'It is a play that only appeals to the few.' And, encouraged by Mrs.
-Bentley's manner, Hubert told her how happy endings and comic love-scenes
-were essential to secure a popular success.
-
-'I am afraid you will think me very stupid, but I do not quite understand.'
-
-In a quiet, unobtrusive way Hubert was a graceful talker, and he knew how
-to adapt his theme, and bring it within the circle of the sympathies of his
-listeners. There was some similarity of temperament between himself and
-Mrs. Bentley; they were both quiet, fair, meditative Saxons. She lent her
-whole mind to the conversation, interested in the account that the young
-man gave of his dramatic aspirations.
-
-From the dining-room window looking over the park the long road wound
-through the vaporous country. The town stood in the middle distance, its
-colour blotted out, and its smoke hardly distinguishable. In the room a
-yellow dress turned grey, and the gold of a bracelet grew darker, and the
-pink of delicate finger-nails was no longer visible. But the pensive dusk
-of the dining-room, which blackened the claret in the decanters, leaving
-only the faintest ruby glow in the glass which Hubert raised to his lips,
-suited the tenor of the conversation, which had wandered from the dramatic
-to the social side of the question. What did he think of divorce? She
-sighed, and he wondered what her story might be.
-
-They passed out of the dining-room, and stood on the gravel, watching the
-night gathering in the open country. In the light of the moon, which had
-just risen above the woods, the white road grew whiter, the town was
-faintly seen in the tide of blue vapour, which here and there allowed a
-field to appear. In the foreground a great silver fir, spiky and solitary,
-rose up in the blue night. Beyond it was seen a corner of the ornamental
-bridge. The island and its shadow were one black mass rising from the park
-up to the level of the moon, which, a little to the right, between the town
-and the island, lay reflected in a narrow strip of water. Farther away some
-reeds were visible in the illusive light, and the meditative chatter of
-dozing ducks stirred the silence which wrapped the country like a cloak.
-
-Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood looking at the landscape. The fragrance of
-his cigar, the presence of the woman, the tenderness of the hour, combined
-to make him strangely happy; his past life seemed to him like a harsh,
-cruel pain that had suddenly ceased. More than he had ever desired seemed
-to be fulfilled; the reality exceeded the dream. What greater happiness
-than to live here, and with this woman! His thoughts paused, for he had
-forgotten the girl up-stairs. She was not happy; but he would make her
-happy--of that he was quite certain. At that moment Mrs. Bentley said--
-
-'I hope you like your home. Is not the prospect a lovely one?'
-
-'Yes; but I was thinking at that moment of Emily. I suppose I must accustom
-myself to call her by her Christian name. She is my cousin, and we are
-going to live together. But, by the way, she cannot stay here alone. I
-hope--I may trust that you will remain with her?'
-
-Mrs. Bentley turned her face towards him; he noticed the look of pleasure
-that had passed into it.
-
-'Thank you; it is very good of you. I shall be glad to remain with Emily as
-long as she cares for my society. It is needless to say I shall do my best
-to deserve your approval.'
-
-[Illustration: "They dined at the Café Royal."]
-
-Her voice fell, and he heard her sigh, and in his happiness it seemed to
-him to be a pity that he should find unhappiness in others.
-
-They went into the drawing-room. Mrs. Bentley asked him if he liked music,
-and she went to the piano and sang some Scotch songs very sweetly. Then she
-took a book from the table and bade him good-night. She was sure that he
-would excuse her. She must go and see after Emily.
-
-When the door closed, the woman who had just left him seemed like some one
-he had seen in a dream; and still more shadowy and illusive did the girl
-seem--that pale and plaintive beauty, looking like a pastel, who had so
-troubled him with her enigmatic eyes! And the lodging-house that he had
-left only a few hours ago! and Rose.
-
-On Sunday he had taken Rose out to dinner. They dined at the Café-Royal. He
-had tried to talk to her about Hamilton Brown's new drama, which they had
-just heard would follow _Divorce_; but he was unable to detach his thoughts
-from Ashwood and the ladies he was going to visit to-morrow evening. Hubert
-and Rose had felt like two school-fellows, one of whom is leaving school;
-the link that had bound them had snapped; henceforth their ways lay
-separate; and they were sad at parting just as school-friends are sad.
-
-'You are not rich; you offered to lend me money once. I want to lend you
-some now.'
-
-'Oh yes; five shillings, wasn't it?'
-
-'It doesn't matter what the sum was--we were both very poor then----'
-
-'And I'm still poorer now.'
-
-'All the more reason why you should allow me to help you.... Allow me to
-write you a cheque for a hundred pounds. I assure you I can afford it.'
-
-'I think I had better not.... I have some things I can sell.'
-
-'But you must not sell your things. Indeed, you must allow me----'
-
-'I think I'd rather not. I shall be all right--that is to say, if Ford
-engages me for Brown's new piece; and I think he will.'
-
-'But if he doesn't?'
-
-'Then,' she said, with a sweet and natural smile, 'I'll write to you.... We
-have been excellent friends--comrades--have we not?'
-
-'Yes, we have indeed, and I shall never forget. There is my address; that
-will always find me.'
-
-He had written a play--a play that the most competent critics had
-considered a work of genius; in any case, a play that had interested his
-generation more than any other. It had failed, and failed twice; but did
-that prove anything? Fortune had deserted him, and he had been unable to
-finish _The Gipsy_. Was it the fault of circumstances that he had not been
-able to finish that play? or was it that the slight vein of genius that had
-been in him once had been exhausted? He remembered the article in _The
-Modern Review_, and was frightened to think that the critic might have
-divined the truth. Once it had seemed impossible to finish that play; but
-fortune had come to his aid, accident had made him master of his destiny;
-he could spend three years, five years if he liked, on _The Gipsy_. But why
-think of the play at all? What did it matter even if he never wrote it?
-There were many things to do in life besides writing plays. There was life!
-His life was henceforth his own, and he could live it as he pleased. What
-should he do with it? To whom should he give it? Should he keep it all for
-himself and his art? It were useless to make plans. All he knew for certain
-was that henceforth he was master of his own life, and could dispense it as
-he pleased.
-
-And then, in sensuous curiosity, his thoughts turned on the pleasure of
-life in this beautiful house, in the society of two charming women.
-
-'Perhaps I shall marry one of them. Which do I like the better? I haven't
-the least idea.' And then, as his thoughts detached themselves, he
-remembered Emily's tears.
-
-
-
-
-X
-
-
-It was a day of English summer, and the meadows and trees drowsed in the
-moist atmosphere; a few white clouds hung lazily in the blue sky; the
-garden was bright with geraniums and early roses, and the closely cropped
-privets were in full leaf. Hubert's senses were taken with the beauty of
-the morning, and there came the thought, so delicious, 'All this is mine.'
-He noticed the glitter of the greenhouses, and thought the cawing of some
-young rooks a sweet sound; a great tortoiseshell cat lay basking in the
-middle of the greensward, whisking its furry tail. Hubert stroked the
-animal; it arched its back, and rubbed itself against his legs. At that
-moment a half-bred fox-terrier barked noisily at him; he heard some one
-calling the dog, and saw a slight black figure hastening down one of the
-side-walks. Despite the dog's attempts on his legs, he ran forward.
-
-'Emily! Emily!' he called. She stopped, turned, and stood looking at him.
-
-'My dear cousin,' he said. 'I'm sorry about last night. I hope that Mrs.
-Bentley has told you. I begged of her to do so.'
-
-'Yes; she told me of your kind intentions. I have to thank you.'
-
-They walked on in silence, neither knowing what to say.
-
-'Go away, Dandy!' said Emily, thrusting her black silk parasol at the dog,
-who had begun an attack on Hubert's trousers. The dog retreated; Hubert
-laughed.
-
-'I'm afraid he doesn't like me.'
-
-'He'll soon get to know you. Are you fond of animals?'
-
-'I don't know that I am, particularly.'
-
-'Oh!' she said, looking at him reproachfully, 'how can you?' Her eyes
-seemed to say, 'I never can like you after that.' 'I adore animals,' she
-said. 'My dear dog--there is nothing in the world I love as I love my
-Dandy; come here, dear.' The dog came, wagging his tail, putting back his
-ears, knowing he was going to be caressed. Emily stooped down, took his
-rough head in her hands, and kissed him. 'Is he not a dear?' she said,
-looking up; and then she said, 'I hope you won't object to having him in
-the house;' her face clouded.
-
-'Oh, my dear Emily, how can you ask such a question? I shall never object
-to anything you desire.' The conversation paused, and they walked some
-paces in silence. Emily had just begun to speak of her flowers, when they
-came upon the gardener, who was standing in consternation over the
-fragments of a broken mowing-machine. Jack--that was the donkey--had been
-left to himself just for a moment. It was impossible to say what wild freak
-had taken him; but instead of waiting, as he was expected to wait,
-stolidly, he had started off on a wild career, regardless of the safety of
-the machine. At the first bound it had come in contact with a flower-vase,
-which had been sent in many pieces over the sward; at the second it had met
-with some stone coping; and at the third it had turned over in complete
-dissolution, and Jack was free to tear up the turf with his hoofs, until
-finally his erratic course was stopped by the small boy who was responsible
-for the animal's behaviour. The arrival of Hubert and Emily saved the small
-boy from many a cuff and the donkey from a kick or two; and Jack stood amid
-the ruin he had created, as quiet and as docile a creature as the mind
-could imagine.
-
-'Oh, you--you wicked Jack! Who would have thought it of you?' said Emily,
-throwing her arms round the animal's neck. 'And at your age, too! This is
-my old donkey,' she said, turning her dreamy eyes on Hubert. 'I used to
-ride him every day until about two years ago. I love my dear old Jack, and
-would not have him beaten for worlds, although he is so wicked as to break
-the mowing-machine. Look what you have done to the flower-vase.' The animal
-shook its long ears.
-
-Hubert and Emily strolled down a long walk, wondering what they should talk
-about.
-
-'These are really very pretty grounds,' he said at last. 'I am sure I shall
-enjoy myself immensely here.' The remark appeared to him to be of doubtful
-taste, and he hastened to add, 'That is to say, if I have completely made
-it up with my pretty cousin.'
-
-'But you have not seen the place yet,' she said, speaking still with a
-certain tremor in her voice. 'You haven't even seen the gardens. Come, and
-I'll show them to you.'
-
-Hubert would have preferred to walk with her through these ornamental
-swards; and he liked the espalier apple-trees with which the garden was
-divided better than the glare and heat of the greenhouses into which she
-took him.
-
-'Do you care for flowers?'
-
-'Not very much.'
-
-'These are all my flowers,' she said, pointing to many rows of flower-pots.
-'Those are Julia's. You see I run a line of thread around mine, so that
-there shall be no mistake. She is not nearly so careful as I am, and it
-isn't nice to find that the plants you have been tending for weeks have
-been spoilt by over-watering. I don't say she doesn't love them, but she
-forgets them.... Just look at those; they are devoured by insects. They
-want to be taken out and given a thorough cleansing. Even then I doubt if
-they would come out right,--a plant never forgives you; it is just like a
-human being.'
-
-'And doesn't a human being ever forgive?'
-
-'Oh, I didn't mean that!' she said, blushing; 'but sometimes I could cry
-over the poor plants which she neglects. I daresay you will think me very
-ridiculous, but I do cry sometimes, and sometimes I cannot resist taking
-them out on the sly, and giving them a thoroughly good syringing,--only you
-must not tell her; we have agreed not to touch each other's flowers. But I
-cannot bear to see the poor things dying. How do we know that they do not
-suffer?'
-
-'I don't think it probable.'
-
-'But we don't know for certain,' she said, fixing her great eyes on him.
-'Do we?'
-
-'We know nothing for certain,' he answered; and then he said, 'You and Mrs.
-Bentley have lived a long time together?'
-
-'No; not very long. About a couple of years. I was about thirteen when I
-came to Ashwood. I am now eighteen. Mrs. Bentley is a sort of connection.
-She is very poor--that is why Mr. Burnett asked her to come and live here;
-besides, as I grew up I wanted a companion. She has been very good to me.
-We have been very happy together--at least, as happy as one may be; for I
-don't think that any one is ever very happy. Have you been very happy?'
-
-'I have not always been happy. But tell me more about Mrs. Bentley.'
-
-'There is little more to tell. I naturally love her very much. She nursed
-me when I was ill--and I'm often ill; she taught me all I know; she cheered
-me when I was sad--when I thought my heart would break; when everybody else
-seemed unkind she was kind. Besides, I could not remain here without her.'
-Emily lowered her eyes, and the conversation seemed to pause.
-
-'I have arranged all that,' Hubert answered hurriedly. 'I spoke to her last
-night, and she has consented to remain.'
-
-'That is very good of you.' Emily raised her eyes and looked shyly at
-Hubert; and then, as if doubtful of herself, she said, 'Do you like her?
-I'm sure you do. Every one does. Do you not think she is very handsome?'
-
-'I think her an exceedingly pleasant woman, and I'm sure we shall all get
-on very well together.'
-
-'But don't you think her very handsome?'
-
-'Yes; she is a handsome woman.'
-
-Nothing more was said. Emily drew meditatively on the gravel with the point
-of her parasol. The gardeners looked up from their work.
-
-'I have to go now,' she said, raising her eyes timidly, 'to feed the swans.
-You would not care to go so far?'
-
-'On the contrary, I should like it, of all things. A walk by the water on a
-day like this will be quite a treat.'
-
-'Then will you wait a moment? I will go and fetch the bread.' She returned
-soon after with a small basket; and a large retriever, tied up in the
-corner of the yard, barked and lugged at his chain. 'He knows where I am
-going, and is afraid I shall forget him--aren't you, dear old Don? You
-wouldn't like to miss a walk with your mistress, would you, dear?' The dog
-bounded and rushed from side to side; it was with difficulty that Emily
-loosed him. Once free, he galloped down the drive, returning at intervals
-for a caress and a sniff at the basket which his mistress carried. 'There's
-nothing there for you, my beautiful Don!'
-
-The drive sloped from the house down to the artificial water, passing under
-some large elms; and in the twilight of the branches where the sunlight
-played, and the silence was tremulous with wings, Hubert felt that Emily
-had forgiven him. She wore the same black dress that he had admired her in
-the night before; her waist was confined by the same black band; but the
-chestnut hair seemed more beautiful beneath the black silk sunshade, leaned
-so gracefully, the black handle held between thumb and forefinger. And the
-little black figure seemed a part of the beautiful English park, now so
-green and fragrant in all the flower and sunlight of June, and decorated
-with a blue summer sky, and white clouds moving lazily over the tops of the
-trees. And the impression of the beautiful park was enforced by its
-reflection, which lay, with the mute magic of reflected things, in the
-still water, stirred only when, with exquisite motion of webbed feet, the
-swans propelled their freshness to and fro, balancing themselves in the
-current where they knew the bread must surely fall.
-
-'They are waiting for me. Cannot you see their black eyes turned towards
-the bridge?' And she threw the bread from the basket, and the beautiful
-birds unbent their curved necks, devouring it voraciously under the water.
-
-In the larger portion of this artificial lake there were two islands,
-thickly wooded. In the smaller, which lay behind Emily and Hubert, there
-was one small island covered with reeds and low bushes, and this was a
-favourite haunt for the waterfowl, which now came swimming forward, not
-daring to approach too near the dangerous swans.
-
-'These are my friends,' said Emily. 'They will follow me to the other end,
-and I shall be able to feed them as we walk along the meadow.'
-
-Don and Dandy bounded through the tall grass; sometimes foolishly giving
-chase to the birds that rose up out of the golden grasses, barking in mad
-eagerness--sometimes pursuing a hare into the distant woods. The last chase
-had led them far, and both dogs returned panting to walk till they
-recovered breath by their mistress's side; and to satisfy the retriever's
-affection Emily held one hand to him. Playing gently with his ears, she
-said--
-
-'Did you ever see much of Mr. Burnett?'
-
-'Not since I was a boy, ten or twelve years ago, when I was at the
-University. There was absolutely no reason for his doing what he did.'
-
-'Yes; there was,' she said in a strangely decisive tone.
-
-'May I ask----'
-
-'I do not know if I ought to tell you. It would be better not to. You
-know,' she continued, speaking now with a nervous tremor in her voice,
-'that I do not want you to think that I am so very disappointed. I do not
-know that I am disappointed at all. You have acted so generously, and it
-will be pleasanter to live here with you than with that old man.'
-
-The conversation fell; but the sweet meadow seemed to induce confidences,
-and they were so happy in their youth and the sorcery of the sunshine.
-'Five years ago I wrote to him,' said Hubert, speaking very slowly, 'asking
-him to lend me fifty pounds, and he refused. Since then I have not heard
-from him.' At the end of a long silence, the girl said--
-
-'So long as you know that I am no longer angry with him for having
-disinherited me, I do not mind telling you the reason. Two months before he
-died he asked me to marry him, and I refused.'
-
-They walked several yards without speaking.
-
-'Do you not think I was right? I was only eighteen, and he was over sixty.'
-
-'It seems to me quite shocking that he could have even contemplated such a
-thing.'
-
-'But look at these poor ducks; they have followed us all the way, and I
-have forgotten to feed them!' Taking out all the bread that remained in the
-basket, Emily threw it to the ducks that had collected where the dammed-up
-stream that filled the lake trickled over a wooden sluice. There was a
-plank by which to cross the deep cutting. Hubert and Emily paused, and
-stood gazing at the large beech wood that swept over some rising ground.
-Don had not been seen for some time, and they both shouted to him.
-Presently a black mass was seen bounding through the flowers, and the
-panting animal once more ensconced himself by his mistress's side.
-
-'I was very fond of Mr. Burnett,' she said, 'but I could not marry him. I
-could not marry any man I did not love.'
-
-'And because you refused to marry him, he did not mention you in his will.
-I never heard of such selfishness before!'
-
-'Men are always selfish,' she said sententiously. 'But it really does not
-matter; things are just the same; he hasn't succeeded in altering
-anything--at least, not for the worse. We shall get on very well together.'
-
-The conversation paused. Then Emily went on: 'You won't tell any one I told
-you? I only told you because I did not want you to think me selfish. I was
-afraid that after the foolish way I behaved last night you might think I
-hated you. Indeed, I do not. Perhaps everything has happened for the best.
-I was very fond of the old man. I gave him my whole heart; no father ever
-had a daughter more attached; but I could not marry him. And it was the
-remembrance of my love for him that made me burst out crying. I do not
-think I realised until I saw you how cruelly I had been treated. But you
-won't tell any one? You won't tell Mrs. Bentley? She knows, of course; but
-do not tell her that I told you. I do not care that my feelings should be
-made a subject of discussion. You promise me?'
-
-'I promise you.'
-
-They had now reached the tennis-lawn. The gong sounded, and Emily said,
-'That is lunch, and we shall find Julia waiting for us in the dining-room.'
-It was as she said. Mrs. Bentley was standing by the sideboard, her basket
-of keys in her hand; she had not quite finished her housekeeping, and was
-giving some last instructions to the butler. Hubert noticed that the place
-at the head of the table was for him, and he sat down a little embarrassed,
-to carve a chicken. So much home after so many years of homelessness seemed
-strange.
-
-
-
-
-XI
-
-
-On the third day, as soon as breakfast was over, Hubert introduced the
-subject of his departure. Julia waited, but as Emily did not speak, she
-said, 'We thought you liked the country better than town.'
-
-'So I do, but----'
-
-'He's tired of us, and we had better leave,' Emily said, abruptly.
-
-Hubert started a little; he looked appealingly at Julia, and seeing the
-look of genuine pain upon his face, she took pity on him. 'You should not
-speak like that, Emily dear; I can see that you pain Mr. Price very much.'
-
-'I hope, Emily, that you will stay here as long as you like,' he said, in a
-low, gentle voice; 'as long as it is convenient and agreeable to you.'
-
-'We cannot stay here without you,' Emily replied; 'we are your guests.'
-
-'And,' said Julia, smiling, 'if there are guests, there must be a host. But
-if you have business in London, of course you must go.'
-
-'I was not thinking of myself,' said Hubert, 'but of you ladies. I was
-afraid that you were already tired of me; that you might like to be left
-alone; that you had business, preparations. I daresay I was all wrong; but
-if Emily knew----'
-
-'I'm sorry, Hubert; I did not mean to offend you. I'm very unlucky. You'll
-forgive me.'
-
-'I've nothing to forgive; I only hope that you'll never think again that I
-want to get rid of you. I hope that you'll stop at Ashwood as long as ever
-it suits you to do so. I don't see how I can say more.'
-
-'I like to stop here as long as you are here,' Emily said, in a low voice.
-'That is all I meant.'
-
-'Then we're all of one mind, I don't want to go back to London. If you
-don't find me in your way, I shall be delighted to stay.'
-
-'Of course,' said Julia, 'we poor country folk can hardly hope to amuse
-you.'
-
-'I don't know about that!' exclaimed Emily. 'Where would he find any one to
-play and sing to him in the evenings as you can?'
-
-The conversation paused, and all were happier that morning, though none
-knew why. Days passed, desultory and sweet, and with a pile of books about
-him, he lay in a long cane chair under the trees; then the book would drop
-on his knees, and blowing smoke in curling wreaths, he lost himself in
-dramatic meditations. It was pleasant to see that Emily had grown
-innocently, childishly fond of her cousin, and her fondness expressed
-itself in a number of pretty ways. 'Now, Hubert, Hubert, get out of my
-way,' she would say, feigning a charming petulance; or she would come and
-drag him out of his chair, saying, 'Come, Hubert, I can't allow you to lie
-there any longer; I have to go to South Water, and want you to come with
-me?'
-
-And walking together, they seemed like an Italian greyhound and a tall,
-shaggy setter.
-
-A cloud only appeared on Emily's face when Julia spoke of their departure.
-Julia had proposed that they should leave at the end of the month, and
-Emily had consented to this arrangement. The end of the month had appeared
-to her indefinitely distant, but three weeks of the subscribed time had
-passed, and signs of departure had become more numerous and more
-peremptory. Allusion had been made to the laundress, and Julia had asked
-Emily if she could get all her things into a single box; if not, they would
-have to send to Brighton for another. Emily had no notion of what her box
-would hold, and she showed little disposition to count her dresses or put
-her linen in order. She seemed entirely taken up thinking what books, what
-pictures, what china she could take away. She would like to have this
-bookcase, and might she not take the wardrobe from her own room? and she
-had known the clock all her life, and it did seem so hard to part with it.
-
-'My dear girl, all these things belong to Mr. Price; you really cannot take
-them away without asking him.'
-
-'But he won't refuse; he'll let me have anything I like.'
-
-'He can't very well refuse, so I think it would be nicer on your part not
-to ask for anything.'
-
-'I must have some of these things: I want to make the house we are going to
-live in, in London, look as much like Ashwood as possible.'
-
-'You'd like to take the whole house with you if you could.'
-
-'Yes; I think I should.' And Emily turned and looked vaguely up and down
-the passage. 'I wonder if he'd give me the picture of the windmill?'
-
-'The landing would look very bare without it.'
-
-'It would indeed, and when we came down here on a visit--for I suppose we
-shall come down here sometimes on visits--I should miss the picture
-dreadfully, so I don't think I'll ask him for it. But I must take some
-pictures away with me. There are a lot of old things in the lumber-room at
-the top of the house, that no one knows anything about. I think I'll ask
-him to let me have them. I'll take him for a good long ramble through the
-house. He hasn't seen any of it yet, except just the rooms we live in
-down-stairs.'
-
-Emily went straight to Hubert. He was lying in the long wicker chair, his
-straw hat drawn over his eyes, for the sun was finding its sharp, white way
-through the leaves of the beeches.
-
-'Now, Hubert, I want you. Are you asleep?'
-
-'Asleep! No, I was only thinking.' He threw his legs over the edge of the
-low chair and stood up.
-
-'If I tell you what I want, you won't refuse me, will you?'
-
-'No,' he said smilingly; 'I don't think I shall.'
-
-'Are you sure?' she said, looking at him enigmatically. Then in a lighter
-tone: 'I want you to give me a lot of things--oh, not a great many, nothing
-very valuable, but----'
-
-'But what, Emily?... You can have anything you want.'
-
-'Well, we shall see. You must come with me; I must show you what--I shan't
-want them unless you like to give them. Come along. Oh, you must come. I
-should not care about them unless you came with me, and let me point them
-out.' She passed her little hand into the arm of his rough coat, and led
-him towards the house. 'You know nothing of your own house, so before I go
-I intend to show you all over it. You have no idea what a funny old place
-it is up-stairs--endless old lumber-rooms which you would never think of
-going into if I didn't take you. When I was a little girl I wasn't often
-allowed down-stairs: the top of the house still seems to me more real than
-any other part.' Throwing open a door at the head of the stairs, she said:
-'This used to be my nursery. It is all bare and deserted now, but I
-remember it quite different. I used to spend hours looking out of that
-window. From it you can see all over the park, and the park used to be my
-great delight. I used to sit there and make resolutions that next time I
-went out I would be braver, and explore the hollows full of bushes and tall
-ferns.'
-
-'Did you never break your resolutions?'
-
-'Sometimes. I was afraid of meeting fairies or elves. There are glades and
-hollows that used to seem very wonderful. And they still seem very
-wonderful, only not quite in the same way. Doesn't the world seem very
-wonderful to you? I'm always wondering at things. But I know I'm only a
-silly little girl, and yet I like to talk to you about my fancies. Down
-there in the beech wood there is a beautiful glade. I loved to play there
-better than anywhere else. I used to lie there on a fur rug and play at
-paper dolls. I always fancied myself a duchess or a princess.'
-
-'You are full of dreams, Emily.'
-
-'Yes; I suppose I am. Everything is pleasant and happy in dreams. I love
-dreaming. They thought I'd never learn to read; but it wasn't because I was
-stupid, but because I wouldn't study. I'd put my hands to my head, and,
-looking at the book, which I didn't see, I'd think of all sorts of things,
-imagine myself a fairy princess.'
-
-'And it was in this room that you dreamed all those dreams?'
-
-'Yes; in this dear old room. You see that picture: that is one of the
-things I intended to ask you to give me.'
-
-'What? That old, dilapidated print?'
-
-'You mustn't abuse my picture. I used to spend hours wondering if those
-horsemen galloping so madly through the wood were robbers, and if they had
-robbed the castle shown between the trees. I used to wonder if they would
-succeed in escaping. They wouldn't gallop their horses like that unless
-they were being pursued.... Can I have the picture?'
-
-'Of course you can. Is that--that is not all you are going to ask me for?'
-
-'I did think of asking you for a few more things. Do you mind?'
-
-'No, not the least. The more you ask for, the more I shall be pleased.'
-
-'Then you must come down-stairs.'
-
-They went down to the next landing. Emily stopped before a bed-room, and,
-looking at Hubert shyly and interrogatively, she said--
-
-'This is my room. I don't know if it is in a fit state to show you. I'm not
-a very tidy girl. I'll look first.'
-
-'Yes; it will do,' she said, drawing back. 'You can look in. I want you to
-give me that wardrobe. It isn't a very handsome one, but I've used it ever
-since I was a little girl; it has a hollow top, and I used to hide things
-there. Do you think you can spare it?'
-
-'Yes; I think I can,' he said, smiling.
-
-Then she led him up-stairs through the old lumber rooms, picking out here
-and there some generally broken and always worthless piece of furniture,
-pleading for it timidly, and strangely delighted when he nodded, granting
-her every request. She asked him to pull out what she had chosen from the
-_débris_, and a curious collection they made in the passage--dim and
-worm-eaten pictures, small book-cases, broken vases which she proposed
-mending.
-
-Hubert wiped the dust from his hands and coat-sleeves.
-
-'What a lot of things you have given me! Now we shall be able to get on
-nicely with our furnishing.'
-
-'What furnishing?'
-
-'The furnishing of the little house in London where Julia and I are going
-to live. You said you intended to add a hundred a year to the three hundred
-a year which Mr. Burnett should have left me; I don't see why you should do
-such a thing, but if you do we shall have four hundred a year to live upon.
-Julia says that we shall then be able to afford to give fifty pounds a year
-for a house. We can get a very nice little house, she says, for that--of
-course, in one of the suburbs. The great expense will be the furnishing; we
-are going to do it on the hire system. I daresay one can get very nice
-things in that way, but I do want to make the place look a little like
-Ashwood; that is why I'm asking you for these things. I was always fond of
-playing in these old lumber-rooms, and these dim old pictures, which I
-don't think any one knows anything of except myself, will remind me of
-Ashwood. They will look very well, indeed, hanging round our little
-dining-room. You are sure you don't want them, do you?'
-
-'No; I won't want them. I'm only too pleased to be able to give them to
-you.'
-
-'You are very good, indeed you are. Look at these old haymakers; I never
-saw but one little corner of this picture before; it was stowed away behind
-a lot of lumber, and I hadn't the strength to pull it out.... I'm afraid
-you've got yourself rather dusty.'
-
-'Oh no; it will brush off.'
-
-'I shall hang this picture over the fireplace; it will look very well
-there. I daresay you don't see anything in it, but I'd sooner have these
-pictures than those down-stairs. I love the picture of the windmill on the
-first landing----'
-
-'Then why not have it? I'll have it taken down at once.'
-
-'No; I could not think of taking it. How would the landing look without it?
-I should miss it dreadfully when I came here--for I daresay you will ask us
-to visit you occasionally, when you are lonely, won't you?'
-
-'My dear Emily, whenever you like, I hope you will come here.'
-
-'And you will come and stay with us in London? Your room will be always
-ready; I'll look after that. We shall feel very offended, indeed, if you
-ever think of going to an hotel. Of course, you mustn't expect much; we
-shall only be able to keep one servant, but we shall try to make you
-comfortable, and, when you come, you'll take me to the theatres, to see one
-of your own plays.'
-
-'If my play's being played, certainly. But would it be right for me to pay
-you visits in London?'
-
-'They would be very wicked people indeed who saw anything wrong in it; you
-are my cousin. But why do you say such things? You destroy all my pleasure,
-and I was so happy just now.'
-
-'I'm afraid, Emily, your happiness hangs on a very slender thread.'
-
-She looked at him inquiringly, but feeling that it would be unwise to
-attempt an explanation, he said in a different tone--
-
-'But, Emily, if you love Ashwood so well, why do you go away?'
-
-'Why do I go away? We have been here now some time.... I can't live here
-always.'
-
-'Why not? Why not let things go on just as they are?'
-
-'And live here with you, I and Julia?'
-
-'Yes; why not?'
-
-'We should bore you; you want to write your plays, you'd get tired of me.'
-
-'Your being here would not prevent my writing my plays. I have been
-thinking all the while of asking you to remain, but was afraid you would
-not care to live here.'
-
-'Not care to live here! But you'll get tired of us; we might quarrel.'
-
-'No; we shall never quarrel. You will be doing me a great favour by
-remaining. Just fancy living alone in this great house, not a soul to speak
-to all day! I'm sure I should end by going out and hanging myself on one of
-those trees.'
-
-'You wouldn't do that, would you?'
-
-Hubert laughed. 'You and Mrs. Bentley will be doing me a great favour by
-remaining. If you go away I shall be robbed right and left, the gardens
-will go to rack and ruin, and when you come down here you won't know the
-place, and then, perhaps, we shall quarrel.'
-
-'I shouldn't like Ashwood to go to rack and ruin--and my poor flowers! And
-I'm sure you'd forget to feed the swans. If you did that, I could not
-forgive you.'
-
-'Well, let these grave considerations decide you to remain.'
-
-'Are you really serious?'
-
-'I never was more serious in my life.'
-
-'Well then, may I run and tell Julia?'
-
-'Certainly, and I'll--no, I won't. I'll look up the housemaids and tell
-them to restore this interesting collection of antiquities to their
-original dust.'
-
-
-
-
-XII
-
-
-He was, perhaps, a little too conscious of his happiness; and he feared to
-do anything that would endanger the pleasure of his present life. It seemed
-to him like a costly thing which might slip from his hand or be broken; and
-day by day he appreciated more and more the delicate comfort of this
-well-ordered house--its brightness, its ample rooms, the charm of space
-within and without, the health of regular and wholesome meals, the presence
-of these two women, whose first desire was to minister to his least wish or
-caprice. These, the first spoilings he had received, combined to render him
-singularly happy. Bohemianism, he often thought, had been forced upon
-him--it was not natural to him, and though spiritual belief was dead, he
-experienced in church a resurrection of influences which misfortune had
-hypnotised, but which were stirring again into life. He was conscious again
-of this revival of his early life in the evenings when Mrs. Bentley went to
-the piano; and when playing a game of chess or draughts, remembrances of
-the old Shropshire rectory came back, sudden, distinct, and sweet. In these
-days the disease of fame and artistic achievement only sang monotonously,
-plaintively, like the wind in the valleys where the wind never wholly
-rests.
-
-Sometimes, when moved by the novel he was reading, he would discuss its
-merits and demerits with the two women who sat by him in the quiet of the
-dim drawing-room, their work on their knees, thinking of him. In the
-excitement of criticism his thoughts wandered to his own work, and the
-women's eyes filled with reveries, and their hands folded languidly over
-their knees. He spoke without emphasis, his words seeming to drop from the
-thick obsession of his dream. At ten the ladies gathered up their work,
-bade him good-night; and nightly these good-nights grew tenderer, and
-nightly they went up-stairs more deeply penetrated with a sense of their
-happiness. But at heart he was a man's man. He hardly perceived life from a
-woman's point of view; and in the long evenings which he spent with these
-women he sometimes had to force himself to appear interested in their
-conversation. He was as far removed from one as from the other. Emily's
-wilfulness puzzled him, and he did not seem to have anything further to
-talk about to Mrs. Bentley.
-
-He missed the bachelor evenings of former days--the whisky and water, the
-pipes, and the literary discussion; and as the days went by he began to
-think of London; his thoughts turned affectionately towards the friends he
-had not seen for so long, and at the end of July he announced his intention
-of running up to town for a few days. So one morning breakfast was hurried
-through; Emily was sure there was plenty of time; Hubert looked at the
-clock and said he must be off; Julia ran after him with parcels which he
-had forgotten; farewell signs were waved; the dog-cart passed out of sight,
-and, after lingering a moment, the women returned to the drawing-room
-thoughtfully.
-
-'I wonder if he'll catch the train,' said Emily, without taking her face
-from the window.
-
-'I hope so; it will be very tiresome for him if he has to come back. There
-isn't another train before three o'clock.'
-
-'If he missed this train he wouldn't go until to-morrow morning.... I
-wonder how long he'll stay away. Supposing something happened, and he never
-came back!' Emily turned round and looked at Julia in dreamy wonderment.
-
-'Not come back at all? What nonsense you are talking, Emily! He won't be
-away more than a fortnight or three weeks.'
-
-'Three weeks! that seems a very long while. How shall we get through our
-evenings?'
-
-Emily had again turned towards the window. Julia did not trouble to reply.
-She smiled a little, as she paused on the threshold, for she remembered
-that no more than a few weeks ago Emily had addressed to her passionate
-speeches declaring her to be her only friend, and that they would like to
-live together, content in each other's companionship, always ignoring the
-rest of the world. Although she had not mistaken these speeches for
-anything more than the nervous passion of a moment, the suddenness of the
-recantation surprised her a little. Three or four days after, the girl was
-in a different mood, and when they came into the drawing-room after dinner
-she threw her arms about Julia's neck, saying, 'Isn't this like old times?
-Here we are, living all alone together, and I'm not boring myself a bit. I
-never shall have another friend like you, Julia.'
-
-'But you'll be very glad when Hubert comes back.'
-
-'There's no harm in that, is there? I should be very ungrateful if I
-wasn't. Think how good he has been to us.... I'm afraid you don't like him,
-Julia.'
-
-'Oh, yes, I do, Emily.'
-
-'Not so much as I do.' And raising herself--she was sitting on Julia's
-knees--Emily looked at Julia.
-
-'Perhaps not,' Julia replied, smiling; 'but then I never hated him as much
-as you did.'
-
-A cloud came over Emily's face. 'I did hate him, didn't I? You remember
-that first evening? You remember when you came up-stairs and found me
-trembling in the passage--I was afraid to go to bed. ... I begged you to
-allow me to sleep with you. You remember how we listened for his footstep
-in the passage, as he went up to bed, and how I clung to you? Then the
-dreams of that night. I never told you what my dreams were, but you
-remember how I woke up with a cry, and you asked me what was the matter?'
-
-'Yes, I remember.'
-
-'I dreamt I was with him in a garden, and was trying to get away; but he
-held me by a single hair, and the hair would not break. How absurd dreams
-are! And the garden was full of flowers, but every time I tried to gather
-them, he pulled me back by that single hair. I don't remember any more,
-only something about running wildly away from him, and losing myself in a
-dark forest, and there the ground was soft like a bog, and it seemed as if
-I were going to be swallowed up every moment. It was a terrible sensation.
-All of a sudden I woke with a cry. The room was grey with dawn, and you
-said: "Emily dear, what have you been dreaming, to cry out like that?" I
-was too tired and frightened to tell you much about my dream, and next
-morning I had forgotten it. I did not remember it for a long time after,
-but all the same some of it came true. Don't you remember how I met Hubert
-next morning on the lawn? We went into the garden and spent the best part
-of the morning walking about the lake.... I don't know if I told you--I ran
-away when I heard him coming, and should have got away had it not been for
-this tiresome dog. He called after me, using my Christian name. I was so
-angry I think I hated him then more than ever. We walked a little way, and
-the next thing I remember was thinking how nice he was. I don't know how it
-all happened. Now I think of it, it seems like magic. It was the day that
-my old donkey ran away with the mowing machine and broke the flower-vase,
-the dear old thing; we had a long talk about "Jack." And then I took Hubert
-into the garden and showed him the flowers. I don't think he cares much
-about flowers; he pretended, but I could see it was only to please me. Then
-I knew that he liked me, for when I told him I was going to feed the swans,
-he said he loved swans and begged to be allowed to come too. I don't think
-a man would say that if he didn't like you, do you?'
-
-Emily's mind seemed to contain nothing but memories of Hubert. What he had
-said on this occasion, how he had looked at her on another. The
-conversation paused and Emily sunned herself in the enchantment of
-recollection, until at last breaking forth again, she said--
-
-'Have you noticed how Ethel Eastwick goes after him? And the odd part of it
-is, that she can't see that he dislikes her. He thinks nothing of her
-singing; he remained talking to me in the conservatory the whole time. I
-asked him to come into the drawing-room, but he pretended to misunderstand
-me, and asked me if I felt a draught. He said, "Let me get you a shawl." I
-said, "I assure you, Hubert, I don't feel any draught." But he would not
-believe me, and said he could not allow me to sit there without something
-on my shoulders. I begged of him not to move, for I knew that Ethel would
-never forgive me if I interrupted her singing; but he said he could get me
-a wrap without interrupting any one. He opened the conservatory door, ran
-across the lawn round to the front door, and came back with--what do you
-think? With two wraps instead of one; one was mine, and the other belonged
-to--I don't know who it belonged to. So I said, "Oh, what ever shall we do?
-I cannot let you go back again. If any one was to come in and find me
-alone, what ever would they think!" Hubert said, "Will you come with me? A
-walk in the garden will be pleasanter than sitting in the conservatory." I
-didn't like going at first, but I thought there couldn't be much harm.'
-
-It seemed to Emily very terrible and very wonderful, and she experienced
-throughout her numbed sense a strange, thrilling pain, akin to joy, and she
-sat, her little fragile form lost in the arm-chair, her great eyes fixed in
-ecstasy, seeing still the dark garden with the great star risen like a
-phantom above the trees. That evening had been to her a wonder and an
-enchantment, and her pausing thoughts dwelt on the moment when the distant
-sound of a bell reached their ears, and the bell came nearer, clanging
-fiercely in the sonorous garden. Then they saw a light--some one had come
-for them with a lantern--a joke, a suitable pleasantry, and amid joyous
-laughter, watching the setting moon, they had gone back to the tiled house,
-where dancers still passed the white-curtained windows. Hubert had sat by
-her at supper, serving her with meat and drink. In the sway of memory she
-trembled and started, looking in the great arm-chair like a little bird
-that the moon keeps awake in its soft nest. She no longer wished to tell
-Julia of that night in the garden; her sensation of it lay far beyond
-words; it was her secret, and it shone through her dreamy youth even as the
-star had shone through the heavens that night. Suddenly she said--
-
-'I wonder what Hubert is doing in London? I wonder where he is now?'
-
-'Now? It is just nine. I suppose he's in some theatre.'
-
-'I suppose he goes a great deal to the theatre. I wonder who he goes with.
-He has lots of friends in London--actresses, I suppose; he knows them who
-play in his plays. He dines at his club----'
-
-'Or at a restaurant.'
-
-'I wonder what a restaurant is like; ladies dine at restaurants, don't
-they?'
-
-As Julia was about to make reply, the servant brought her a letter. She
-opened the envelope, and took out a long, closely-written letter; she
-turned it over to see the signature, and then looking toward Emily, she
-said, with a pleasant smile--
-
-'Now I shall be able to answer your questions better; this letter is from
-Mr. Price.'
-
-'Oh, what does he say? Read it.'
-
-'Wait a moment, let me glance through it first; it is very difficult to
-read.' A few moments after, Julia said, 'There's not much that would
-interest you in the letter, Emily; it is all about his play. He says he
-would have written before if he had not been so busy looking out for a
-theatre, and engaging actors and actresses. He hopes to start rehearsing
-next week.
-
-"I say I hope, because there are still some parts of the play which do not
-satisfy me, particularly the third act. I intend to work steadily on the
-play till, next Thursday, five or six hours every day; I am in perfect
-health and spirits, and ought to be able to get the thing right. Should I
-fail to satisfy myself, or should any further faults appear when we begin
-to rehearse the piece, I shall dismiss my people, pack up my traps, and
-return to Ashwood. There I shall have quiet; here, people are continually
-knocking at my door, and I cannot deny my friends the pleasure of seeing
-me, if that is a pleasure. But at Ashwood, as I say, I shall be sure of
-quiet, and can easily finish the play this autumn, and February is a better
-time than September to produce a play."'
-
-'Then he goes on,' said Julia, 'to explain the alterations he contemplates
-making. There's no use reading you all that.'
-
-'I suppose you think I should not understand.'
-
-'My dear Emily, if you want to read the letter, there it is.'
-
-'I don't want to see your letter.'
-
-'What do you mean, Emily?'
-
-'Nothing, only I think it rather strange that he didn't write to me.'
-
-Some days after, Emily took up the book that Julia had laid down.
-'"Shakespeare's Plays." I suppose you are reading them so that you'll be
-able to talk to him better.'
-
-'I never thought of such a thing, Emily.' At the end of a long silence
-Emily said--
-
-'Do you think clever men like clever women?'
-
-'I don't know. Some say they do, some say they don't. I believe that really
-clever men, men of genius, don't.'
-
-'I wonder if Hubert is a man of genius. What do you think?'
-
-'I really am not capable of expressing an opinion on the matter.'
-
-Another week passed away, and Emily began to assume an air of languor and
-timid yearning. One day she said--
-
-'I wonder he doesn't write. He hasn't answered my letter yet. Has he
-answered yours?'
-
-'He has not written to me again. He hasn't time for letter-writing. He is
-working night and day at his play.'
-
-'I suppose he'd never think of coming down by the morning train. He'd be
-sure to come by the five o'clock.'
-
-'He won't come without writing. He'd be sure to write for the dog-cart.'
-
-'I suppose so. There's no use in looking out for him.'
-
-But, notwithstanding her certitude on the point, Emily could not help
-choosing five o'clock as the time for a walk, and Julia noticed that the
-girl's feet seemed to turn instinctively towards the lodge. Often she would
-leave the flowers she was tending on the terrace, and stand looking through
-the dim, sun-smitten landscape toward the red-brown spot, which was
-Southwater, in the middle of the long plain.
-
-
-
-
-XIII
-
-
-Hubert felt called upon to entertain his friends, and one evening they all
-sat dining at Hurlingham in the long room. The conversation, as usual, had
-been about books and pictures.
-
-It was the moment when strings of lanterns were hoisted from tree to tree.
-In front of a large space of sky the coloured globes were crude and
-trivial; but in the shadows of the trees by the river, where the mist rose
-into the branches, they had begun to awaken the first impression of
-melancholy and the sadness of _fête_. It was the moment when the great
-trees hung heavy and motionless, strangely green and solemn beneath a
-slate-coloured sky; and the plaintive waltz cried on Hungarian
-fiddle-strings, till it seemed the soul of this feminine evening. The
-fashionable crowd had moved out upon the lawn; the white dresses were
-phantom blue, and the men's coats faded into obscure masses, darkening the
-gathering shadows. It was the moment when voices soften, and every heart,
-overpowered with yearning, is impelled to tell of grief and disillusion;
-and every moment the wail of the fiddles grew more unbearable, tearing the
-heart to its very depths.
-
-Author and actor-manager walked up the lawn puffing at their cigars. The
-others sat watching, knowing that the opportunity had come for criticism of
-their friend.
-
-'He does not change much,' said Harding. 'Circumstances haven't affected
-him. A year ago he lived in a garret re-writing his play _Divorce_. He now
-rewrites _Divorce_ in a handsome house in Sussex.'
-
-'I thought he had finished his play,' said Thompson. 'I heard that he was
-going to take a theatre and produce it himself.'
-
-'But did you not hear him say at dinner that he was re-writing as he
-rehearsed? I met one of the actors yesterday. He doesn't know what to make
-of it. He gets a new part every week to learn.'
-
-'Do you think he'll ever produce it?'
-
-'I doubt it. At the last moment he'll find that the third act doesn't
-satisfy him, and will postpone the production till the spring.'
-
-'What do you think of his work?'
-
-'Very intelligent, but a little insipid--like himself. Look at him. _Il est
-bien l'homme de ses ouvres_. There is something dry about him, and his
-writings are like himself--hard, dry and wanting in personal passion.'
-
-'Yet he talks charmingly, with vivacity and intelligence, and he is so full
-of appreciation of Shakespeare, Goethe, and such genuine love for
-antiquity.'
-
-'I've heard him talk Shakespeare, Goethe, and Ibsen,' said Harding, 'but I
-never heard him say anything new, anything personal. It seems to me that
-you mistake quotation for perception. He assimilates, but he originates
-nothing. He has read a great deal; he is covered with literature like a
-rock with moss and lichen. He's appreciative, I will say that for him. He
-would make a capital editor, or a tutor, or a don, an Oxford don. He would
-be perfectly happy as a don; he could read up the German critics and
-expound Sophocles. He would be perfectly happy as a don. As it is, he is
-perfectly miserable.'
-
-'There was a fellow who had a studio over mine,' said Thompson. 'He had
-been in the army and used to paint a bit. The academy by chance hung a
-portrait, so he left the army and turned portrait-painter. One day he saw a
-picture by Velasquez, and he understood how horrid were the red things he
-used to send to the academy. He used to come down to see me; he used to
-say, "I wish I had never seen a picture, by Gad, it is driving me out of my
-mind." Poor chap, I wanted him to go back to the army. I said, Why paint?
-no one forces you to; it makes you miserable; don't do so any more. When
-you have anything to say, art is a joy; when you haven't, it is a curse to
-yourself and to others.'
-
-Philipps, the editor of _The Cosmopolitan_, turned towards Harding, and he
-said--
-
-'I cannot follow you in your estimate of Hubert Price. I don't see him
-either mentally or physically as you do. It seems to me that you distort
-the facts to make them fit in with your theory. He is tall and thin, but I
-do not think that his nature is hard and dry. I should, on the contrary,
-say that he was of a soft rather than a hard nature. The expression of his
-face is mild and melancholy. I do not detect the dry, hard, rocky basis of
-which you speak. I should say that Price was a sentimental man.'
-
-'I have never heard of him being in love,' said Harding. 'I should say that
-he had been entirely uninfluenced by women.'
-
-'But love of women is only one form of sentimentality and not the highest,
-nor the deepest,' said Philipps. 'I can imagine a man being exceedingly
-sentimental and not caring about women at all.'
-
-'What you say is true,' said Harding. His face showed that he felt the
-observation to be true and was interested in it. 'But I think I described
-him truly when I said he was like a rock overgrown with moss and lichen.
-There is not sufficient root-hold for any idea to grow in him, it withers
-and dies. Examine his literature, and you'll see it is as I say. He has
-written some remarkable plays, I don't say he hasn't. But they seem to be
-better than they are. He gets a picturesque situation, but there is always
-something mechanical about it. There's a human emotion somewhere, but it's
-never really there; it might have been, but it is not.... It is very well
-done, it is very intelligent; but it does not seem to live, to
-palpitate.... In like manner there are men who have read everything, who
-understand everything, who can theorise; they can tell you all about the
-masterpiece, but when it comes to producing one, well, they're not on in
-that scene.'
-
-'What an excellent character he would make in a novel! A drama of
-sterility,' said Phillips.
-
-'Or the dramas which they bring about,' said Harding.
-
-'Yes, or the dramas they bring about. But what drama can Price bring
-about--he shuts himself up in a room and tries to write a play,' said
-Phillips. 'I don't see how he can dramatise any life but his own.'
-
-'All deviations from the normal tend to bring about drama,' said Harding.
-
-'Then, why don't you do a Hubert Price in a book? It would be most
-interesting. Do you think you ever will?'
-
-'I don't think so.'
-
-'Why not? Because he is a friend of yours, and you would not like----'
-
-'I never allow my private life to interfere with my literature. No; for
-quite other reasons. I admit that he represents physically and mentally a
-great deal of the intellectual impotence current in our time. But it would
-be difficult, I think, to bring vividly before the reader that tall, thin,
-blonde man, with his pale gentle eyes and his insipid mind. I should take
-quite a different kind of man as my model.'
-
-'What kind of man?' said Phillips, and the five or six writers and painters
-leaned forward to listen to Harding.
-
-'I think I should imagine a man about the medium height. A nice figure,
-light, trim, neat. Good-looking, straight nose, eyes bright and
-intelligent. I think he would have beard, a very close-cut beard. The turn
-of his mind would be metaphysical and poetic--an intense subtility of mind
-combined with much order. He would be full of little habits. He would have
-note-books of a special kind in which to enter his ideas. The tendency of
-his mind would be towards concision, and he would by degrees extend his
-desire for concision into the twilight and the night of symbolism.'
-
-'A sort of constipated Browning,' said Phillips.
-
-'Exactly,' said Harding.
-
-'And would you have him married?' asked John Norton.
-
-'Certainly. I imagine him living in a tiny little house somewhere near the
-river--Westminster or Chelsea. His wife would be a dreadful person, thin,
-withered, herring-gutted--a sort of red herring with a cap. But his
-daughter would be charming, she would have inherited her father's features.
-I can imagine these women living in admiration of this man, tending on him,
-speaking very little, removed from worldly influences, seeing only the
-young men who come every Tuesday evening to listen to the poet's
-conversation--I don't hear them saying much--I can see them sitting in a
-corner listening for the ten thousandth time to aestheticisms not one word
-of which they understand, and about ten o'clock stealing away to some
-mysterious chamber. Something of the poet's sterility would have descended
-upon them.'
-
-'That is how you imagine _un génie raté_,' said Phillips. 'Your
-conception is clear enough; why don't you write the book?'
-
-'Because there is nothing more to say on the subject. It is a subject for a
-sketch, not for a book. But of this I'm sure, that the dry-rock man would
-come out more clearly in a book than the soft, insipid, gentle,
-companionable, red-bearded fellow.'
-
-'If Price were the dry, sterile nature you describe, we should feel no
-interest in him, we should not be discussing him as we are,' said Phillips.
-
-'Yes, we should--Price suffers; we're interested in him because he
-suffers--because he suffers in public--"I never was happy except on those
-rare occasions when I thought I was a great man." In that sentence you'll
-find the clew to his attractiveness. But in him there is nothing of the
-irresponsible passion which is genius. There's that little Rose
-Massey--that little baby who spends half her day dreaming, and who is as
-ignorant as a cod-fish. Well, she has got that something--that undefinable
-but always recognisable something. It was Price who discovered her. We used
-to laugh at him when he said she had genius. He was right; we were wrong.
-The other night I was standing in the wings; she was coming down from her
-dressing-room--she lingered on the stairs, looking the most insignificant
-little thing you can well imagine; but the moment her cue came a strange
-light came into her eyes and a strange life was fused in her limbs; she was
-transformed, and went on the stage a very symbol of passion and romance.'
-
-The slate colour of the sky did not seem to change, and yet the night grew
-visibly denser in the park; and there had come the sensation of things
-ended, a movement of wraps thrown over shoulders and thought of bedtime and
-home. The crowd was moving away, and nearly lost in the darkness Hubert
-came towards his friends. He had just knocked the ash from his cigar, and
-as he drew in the smoke the glow of the lighted end fled over his blonde
-face.
-
-
-
-
-XIV
-
-
-One day a short letter came from Hubert, asking Mrs. Bentley to send the
-dog-cart to the station to fetch him. He had decided to come home at once,
-and postpone the production of his play till the coming spring.
-
-Every rehearsal had revealed new and serious faults of construction. These
-he had attempted to remove when he went home in the evening, but though he
-often worked till daybreak, he did not achieve much. The very knowledge
-that he must come to rehearsal with the re-written scene seemed to produce
-in him a sort of mental paralysis, and, striking the table with his fist,
-he would get up, and a thought would cross his mind of how he might escape
-from this torture. After one terrible night, in which he feared his brain
-was really giving way, he went down to the theatre and dismissed the
-company, for he had resolved to return to Ashwood and spend another autumn
-and another winter re-writing _The Gipsy_. If it did not come right then,
-he would bother no more about it. Why should he? There was so much else in
-life besides literature. He had plenty of money, and was determined in any
-case to enjoy himself. So did his thoughts run as he leaned back on the
-cushions of a first-class carriage, glancing casually through the evening
-paper. Presently his eye was caught by a paragraph narrating an odd
-calamity which had overtaken a scene carpenter, an honest, respectable,
-sober, hard-working man, who had fulfilled all social obligations as
-perfectly as the most exacting could desire, until the day he had conceived
-the idea of a machine for the better exhibition of advertisements on the
-hoardings. His system was based on the roller-towel. The roller was moved
-by clockwork, and the advertisements went round like the towel. At first he
-spent his spare time and his spare money upon it, but as the hobby took
-possession of him, he devoted all his time and all his money to it; then he
-pawned his clothes, and then he raised money on the furniture; the brokers
-came in, and finally the poor fellow was taken to a lunatic asylum, and his
-wife and family were thrown on the parish. The story impressed Hubert
-strangely. He saw an analogy between himself and the crazy inventor, and he
-asked himself if he would go on re-writing _The Gipsy_ until he went out of
-his mind. 'Even if I do,' he thought, 'I can hurt no one but myself. No one
-else is dependent on me; my hobby can hurt no one but myself.' These
-forebodings passed away, and his mind filled up with schemes of work. He
-knew exactly what he wanted to do, and he looked forward to doing it. He
-wanted quiet, he wanted long days alone with himself. Such were his
-thoughts in the dog-cart as he drove home, and it was therefore vaguely
-unpleasant to him to meet the two ladies waiting for him at the lodge gate.
-Their smiles of welcome irritated him; he longed for the solitude of his
-study, the companionship of his work; and instead he had to sit with them
-in the drawing-room, and tell them how he liked London, what he had done
-there, whom he had seen there, and why he had been unable to finish his
-play to his satisfaction.
-
-In the morning Emily or Mrs. Bentley was generally about to pour out his
-coffee for him and keep him company. One day Hubert noticed that it was no
-longer Mrs. Bentley but Emily who met him in the passage, and followed him
-into the dining-room. And while he was eating she sat with her feet on the
-fender, talking of some girls in the neighbourhood--their jealousies, and
-how Edith Eastwick could not think of anything for herself, but always
-copied her dresses. Dandy drowsed at her feet, and very often she would
-take him to the window and make him go through all his tricks, calling on
-Hubert to admire him.
-
-She had a knack of monopolising Hubert, and since his return from London,
-her desire to do so had become almost a determination. Hubert showed no
-disinclination, and after breakfast they were to be seen together in the
-gardens. Hubert was a great catch, and there were other young ladies eager
-to be agreeable to him; but he did not seem to desire flirtation with any.
-So they came to speak of him as a very clever man, no doubt; but as they
-knew nothing about plays, he very probably did not care to talk to them.
-Hubert was not attractive in general society, and he would soon have failed
-to interest them at all had it not been for Emily. She was proud of her
-influence over him, and for the first time showed a desire to go into
-society. Day by day her conversation turned more and more on
-tennis-parties, and she even spoke about a ball. He consented to take her;
-and he had to dance with her, and she refused nearly every one, saying she
-was tired, leading Hubert away for long conversations in the galleries and
-on the staircases. Hubert had positively nothing to say to her; but she
-seemed quite happy as long as she was with him. And as they drove through
-the dawn Emily chattered of a hundred trifles,--what Edith had said, what
-Mabel wore, of the possibility of a marriage, and the arrival of a
-detachment of some cavalry regiment. Hubert found it hard to affect
-interest in these conversations. His brain was weary with waltz tunes, the
-shape of shoulders, and the glare and rustle of silk; but as she chattered,
-rubbing the misted windows from time to time, so as to determine how far
-they were from home, he wondered if he should ever marry, and half
-playfully he thought of her as his wife.
-
-But without warning his dreams were broken by a sudden thought, and he
-said--
-
-'Another time, I think it will be better, my dear Emily, that Mrs. Bentley
-should take you out.'
-
-'Why should you not take me out?... I suppose you don't care to--I bore
-you.'
-
-'No; on the contrary, I enjoy it--I like to see you amused; but I think you
-should have a proper chaperon.'
-
-Emily did not answer; and a little cloud came over her face. Hubert thought
-she looked even prettier in her displeasure than she had done in her joy;
-and he went to sleep thinking of her. Never had he thought her so
-beautiful--never had she touched him with so personal an interest; and next
-morning, when he lounged in his study, he was glad to hear her knock at the
-door; and the half-hour he spent with her there, yielding to her pleading
-to come for a walk with her, or drive her over to Southwater in the
-dog-cart, was one of unalloyed pleasure. But a few days after, as he lay in
-bed, a new idea came to him for his third act. So he said he would have
-breakfast in his study. He dressed, thinking the whole time how he could
-round off his idea and bring it into the act. So clear and precise did it
-seem in his mind that he sat down immediately after breakfast, forgetting
-even his matutinal cigar, and wrote with a flowing pen. He had left orders
-that he was not to be disturbed; and was annoyed when the door opened and
-Emily entered.
-
-'I am very sorry, but you must not be cross with me; I do so want you to
-come and see the Eastwicks with me.'
-
-'My dear Emily, I could not think of such a thing this morning. I am very
-busy--indeed I am.'
-
-'What are you doing? Nothing very important, I can see. You are only
-writing your play. You might come with me.'
-
-'My play is as important to me as a visit to the Eastwicks is to you,' he
-answered, smiling.
-
-'I have promised Edith.... I really do wish you would come.'
-
-'My dear Emily, it is quite impossible: do let me get on with my work!'
-
-Emily's face instantly changed expression; she turned to leave the room,
-and Hubert had to go after her and beg her to forgive him--he really had
-not meant to be rude to her.
-
-'You don't care to talk to me. I am not clever enough for you.'
-
-Then pity took him, and he made amends by suggesting they should go for a
-walk in the park, and she often succeeded in leading him even to dry,
-uninteresting neighbours. But the burden grew heavier, and soon he could
-endure no longer the evenings of devotion to her in the drawing-room, where
-the presence of Mrs. Bentley seemed to fill her with incipient rebellion.
-One evening after dinner, as he was about to escape up-stairs, Emily took
-his arm, pleading that he should play at least one game of backgammon with
-her. He played three; and then, thinking he had done enough, he took up a
-novel and began to read. Emily was bitterly offended. She sat in a corner,
-a picture of deep misery; and whenever he spoke to Mrs. Bentley, he thought
-she would burst into tears. It was exasperating to be the perpetual victim
-of such folly; and, pressed by the desire to talk to Mrs. Bentley about the
-book he was reading, he suggested that she should come with him to the
-meet. The Harriers met for the first time that season at not five miles
-from Ashwood. Mrs. Bentley pleaded an engagement. She had promised to go
-over to tea at the rectory.
-
-'Oh, we shall be back in plenty of time; I'll leave you at the rectory on
-our way home.'
-
-'Thank you, Mr. Price; but I do not think I can go.'
-
-'And why, may I ask?'
-
-'Well, perhaps Emily would like to go.'
-
-'Emily has a cold, and it would be folly of her to venture a long drive on
-a cold morning.'
-
-'My cold is quite well.'
-
-'You were complaining before dinner how bad it was.'
-
-'If you don't want to take me, say so.' Tears were now streaming down her
-cheeks.
-
-'My dear Emily, I am only too pleased to have you with me; I was only
-thinking of your cold.'
-
-'My cold is quite gone,' she said, with brightening face; and next morning
-she came down with her waterproof on her arm, and she had on a new cloth
-dress which she had just received from London. Hubert recognised in each
-article of attire a sign that she was determined to carry her point. It
-seemed cruel to tell her to take her things off, and he glanced at Mrs.
-Bentley and wondered if she were offended.
-
-'I hope the drive won't tire you; you know the meet is at least five miles
-from here.'
-
-Emily did not answer. She looked charming with her great boa tied about her
-throat, and sprang into the dog-cart all lightness and joy.
-
-'I hope you are well wrapped up about the knees,' said Mrs. Bentley.
-
-'Oh yes, thank you; Hubert is looking after me.'
-
-Mrs. Bentley's calm, statuesque face, whereon no trace of envy appeared,
-caught Hubert's attention as he gathered up the reins, and he thought how
-her altruism contrasted with the passionate egotism of the young girl.
-
-'I hope Julia was not disappointed. I know she wanted to come; but----'
-
-'But what?'
-
-'Well, no one likes Julia more than I do, and I don't want to say anything
-against her; but, having lived so long with her, I see her faults better
-than you can. She is horribly selfish! It never occurs to her to think of
-me.'
-
-Hubert did not answer, and Emily looked at him inquiringly. At last she
-said, 'I suppose you don't think so?'
-
-'Well, Emily, since you ask me, I must say that I think she took it very
-good-humouredly. You said you were ill, and it was all arranged that I
-should drive her to the meet; then you suddenly interposed, and said you
-wanted to go; and the moment you mentioned your desire to go, she gave way
-without a word. I really don't know what more you want.'
-
-'You don't know Julia. You cannot read her face. She never forgets
-anything, and is storing it up, and will pay me out for it sooner or
-later.'
-
-'My dear Emily, how can you say such things? I never heard---- She is
-always ready to sacrifice herself for you.'
-
-'You think so. She has a knack of pretending to be more unselfish than
-another; but she is in reality intensely selfish.'
-
-'All I can say is that it does not strike me so. I never saw any one give
-way more good-humouredly than she did to-day.'
-
-'I don't think that that is so wonderful, after all. She is only a paid
-companion; and I do not see why she should go driving about the country
-with you, and I be left at home.'
-
-Hubert was somewhat shocked. The conversation paused.
-
-'She gets on very well with men,' Emily said at last, breaking an
-irritating silence somewhat suddenly. 'They say she is very good-looking.
-Don't you think so?'
-
-'Oh yes, she is certainly a pretty woman--or, I should say, a good-looking
-woman. She is too tall to be what one generally understands as a pretty
-woman.'
-
-'Do you like tall women?'
-
-At that moment the hunt appeared in the field at the bottom of the hill. A
-grey horse had just got rid of his rider, and after galloping round and
-round, his head in the air, stopped and began to graze. The others jumped
-the hedge, and the greater part of the field got over the brook in capital
-style. Emily and Hubert watched them with delighted eyes, for the sight was
-indeed picturesque this fine autumn day. Even their horse pricked up his
-ears and began neighing, and Hubert had to hold him tight in hand, lest he
-should break away while they were enjoying the spectacle. At that moment a
-poor little animal, with fear-haunted eyes, and in all the agony of
-fatigue, appeared above the crest of the hill, and immediately after came
-the straining hounds, one within a dozen yards of the poor little beast,
-now running in a circle, uttering the most plaintive and pitiful cries.
-
-'Oh, they are not going to kill it!' cried Emily. 'Oh, save it, save it,
-Hubert!' She hid her face in her hands. 'Did it escape? is it killed?' she
-said, looking round. 'Oh, it is too cruel!' The huntsman was calling to the
-hounds, holding something above them, and at every moment horses' heads
-appeared over the brow of the hill.
-
-There was more hunting; and when the October night began to gather, and the
-lurid sunset flared up in the west, Hubert got out another wrap, and placed
-it about Emily's shoulders. But although the chill night had drawn them
-close together in the dog-cart, they were as widely separated as if oceans
-were between them. So far as lay in his power he had hidden the annoyance
-that the intrusion of her society had occasioned him; and, to deceive her,
-very little concealment was necessary. So long as she saw him she seemed to
-live in a dream, unconscious of every other thought.
-
-They rolled through a gradual effacement of things, seeing the lights of
-the farmhouses in the long plain start into existence, and then remain
-fixed, like gold beetles pinned on a blue curtain. The chill evening drew
-her to him, till they seemed one; and full of the intimate happiness of the
-senses which comes of a long day spent in the open air, she chattered of
-indifferent things. He thought how pleasant the drive would be were he with
-Mrs. Bentley--or, for the matter of that, with any one with whom he could
-talk about the novel that had interested him. They rolled along the smooth
-wide road, watching the streak of light growing narrower in a veil of light
-grey cloud drawn athwart the sky. Overpowered by her love, the girl hardly
-noticed his silence; and when they passed through the night of an
-overhanging wood her flesh thrilled, and a little faintness came over her;
-for the leaves that brushed her face had seemed like a kiss from her lover.
-
-
-
-
-XV
-
-
-One afternoon, about the end of September, Hubert came down from his study
-about tea-time, and announced that he had written the last scene of his
-last act. Emily was alone in the drawing-room.
-
-'Oh, how glad I am! Then it is done at last. Why not write at once and
-engage the theatre? When shall we go to London?'
-
-'Well, I don't mean that the play could be put into rehearsal to-morrow. It
-still requires a good deal of overhauling. Besides, even if it were
-completely finished, I should not care to produce it at once. I should like
-to lay it aside for a couple of months, and see how it read then.'
-
-'What a lot of trouble you do take! Does every one who writes plays take so
-much trouble?'
-
-'No, I'm afraid they do not, nor is it necessary they should. Their plays
-are merely incidents strung together more or less loosely; whereas my play
-is the development of a temperament, of temperamental characteristics which
-cannot be altered, having been inherited through centuries; it must
-therefore pursue its course to a fatal conclusion. In Shakespeare---- But
-no, no! these things have no interest for you. You shall have the nicest
-dress that money can buy; and if the play succeeds----'
-
-The girl raised her pathetic eyes. In truth, she cared not at all what he
-talked to her about; she was occupied with her own thoughts of him, and
-just to sit in the room with him, and to look at him occasionally, was
-sufficient. But for once his words had pained her. It was because she could
-not understand that he did not care to talk to her. Why did she not
-understand? It was hard for a little girl like her to understand such
-things as he spoke about; but she would understand; and then her thoughts
-passed into words, and she said--
-
-'I understand quite as well as Julia. She, knows the names of more books
-than I, and she is very clever at pretending that she knows more than she
-does.'
-
-At that moment Mrs. Bentley entered. She saw that Emily was enjoying her
-talk with her cousin, and tried to withdraw. But Hubert told her that he
-had written the last act; she pretended to be looking for a book, and then
-for some work which she said had dropped out of her basket.
-
-'If Emily would only continue the talking,' she thought, 'I should be able
-to get away.' But Emily said not a word. She sat as if frozen in her chair;
-and at length Mrs. Bentley was obliged to enter, however cursorily, into
-the conversation.
-
-'If you have written out _The Gipsy_ from end to end, I should advise you
-to produce it without further delay. Once it is put on the stage, you will
-be able to see better where it is wrong.'
-
-'Then it will be too late. The critics will have expressed their opinion;
-the work will be judged. There are only one or two points about which I am
-doubtful. I wish Harding were here. I cannot work unless I have some one to
-talk to about my work. I don't mean to say that I take advice; but the very
-fact of reading an act to a sympathetic listener helps me. I wrote the
-first act of _Divorce_ in that way. It was all wrong. I had some vague
-ideas about how it might be mended. A friend came in; I told him my
-difficulties; in telling them they vanished, and I wrote an entirely new
-act that very night.'
-
-'I'm sorry,' said Mrs. Bentley, 'that I am not Mr. Harding. It must be very
-gratifying to one's feelings to be able to help to solve a literary
-difficulty, particularly if one cannot write oneself.'
-
-'But you can--I'm sure you can. I remember asking your advice once before;
-it was excellent, and was of immense help to me. Are you sure it will not
-bore you? I shall be so much obliged if you will.'
-
-'Bore me! No, it won't bore me,' said Mrs. Bentley. 'I'm sure I feel very
-much flattered.' The colour mounted to her cheek, a smile was on her lips;
-but it went out at the sight of Emily's face.
-
-'Then come up to my study. We shall have just time to get through the first
-act before dinner.'
-
-Mrs. Bentley hesitated; and, noticing her hesitation, Hubert looked
-surprised. At that moment Emily said--
-
-'May I not come too?'
-
-'Well, I don't know, Emily. You see that we wish to see if there is
-anything in the play that a young girl should not hear.'
-
-'Always an excuse to get rid of me. You want to be alone. I never come into
-the room that you do not stop speaking. Oh, I can bear it no longer!'
-
-'My dear Emily!'
-
-'Don't touch me! Go to her; shut yourself up together. Don't think of me. I
-can bear it no longer!' And she fled from the room, leaving behind her a
-sensation of alarm and pity. Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood looking at each
-other, both at a loss for words. At last he said--
-
-'That poor child will cry herself into her grave. Have you noticed how
-poorly she is looking?'
-
-'Not noticed! But you do not know half of it. It has been going on now a
-long time. You don't know half!'
-
-'I have noticed that things are not settling down as I hoped they would. It
-really has become quite dreadful to see that poor face looking
-reproachfully at you all day long. And I am quite at a loss to know what's
-the right thing to do.'
-
-'It is worse than you think. You have not noticed that we hardly speak
-now?'
-
-'You--who were such friends--surely not!'
-
-Then she told him hurriedly, in brief phrases, of the change that had taken
-place in Emily in the last three months. 'It was only the other night she
-accused me of going after you, of having designs upon you. It is very
-painful to have to tell you these things, but I have no choice in the
-matter. She lay on her bed crying, saying that every one hated her, that
-she was thoroughly miserable. Somehow she seems naturally an unhappy child.
-She was unhappy at home before she came here; but then I believe she had
-excellent reasons,--her mother was a very terrible person. However, all
-that is past; we have to consider the present now. She accused me of having
-designs on you, insisting all the while that every one was talking about
-it, and that she was fretting solely because of my good name. Of course, it
-is very ridiculous; but it is very pitiful, and will end badly if we don't
-take means to put a stop to it. I shouldn't be surprised if she went off
-her head. We ought to have the best medical advice.'
-
-'This is very serious,' he said. And then, at the end of a long silence, he
-said again, 'This is very serious--perhaps far more serious than we think.'
-
-'Not more serious than I think. I ought to have spoken about it to you
-before; but the subject is a delicate one. She hardly sleeps at all at
-night; she cries sometimes for hours; she works herself up into such fits
-of nervousness that she doesn't know what she is saying,--accuses me of
-killing her, and then repents, declaring that I am the only one who has
-ever cared for her, and begs of me not to leave her. I do assure you it is
-becoming very serious.'
-
-'Have you any proposal to make regarding her? I need hardly say that I'm
-ready to carry out any idea of yours.'
-
-'You know what the cause of it is, I suppose?'
-
-'I do not know; I am not certain. I daresay I'm mistaken.'
-
-'No, you are not; I wish you were--that is to say, unless---- But I was
-saying that it is most serious. The child's health is affected; she is
-working herself up into an awful state of mind; she is losing all
-self-control. I'm sure I'm the last person who would say anything against
-her; but the time has come to speak out. Well, the other day, when we were
-at the Eastwicks, you took the chair next to mine when she left the room.
-When she returned, she saw that you had changed your place, and she said to
-Ethel Eastwick, "Oh, I'm fainting. I cannot go in there; they are
-together." Ethel had to take her up to her room. Well, this morbid
-sensitiveness is most unhealthy. If I walk out on the terrace, she follows,
-thinking that I have made an appointment to meet you. Jealousy of me fills
-up her whole mind. I assure you that I am most seriously alarmed. Something
-occurs every day--trifles, no doubt; and in anybody else they would mean
-nothing, but in her they mean a great deal.'
-
-'But what do you propose?'
-
-'Unless you intend to marry her--forgive me for speaking so plain--there is
-only one thing to do. I must leave.'
-
-'No, no; you must not leave! She could not live alone with me. But does she
-want you to leave?'
-
-'No; that is the worst of it. I have proposed it; she will not hear of it;
-to mention the subject is to provoke a scene. She is afraid if I left that
-you would come and see me; and the very thought of my escaping her
-vigilance is intolerable.'
-
-'It is very strange.'
-
-'Yes, it is very strange; but, opposed though she be to all thoughts of it,
-I must leave.'
-
-'As a favour I ask you to stay. Do me this service, I beg of you. I have
-set my heart on finishing my play this autumn. If it isn't finished now, it
-never will be finished; and your leaving would create so much trouble that
-all thought of work would be out of the question. Emily could not remain
-alone here with me. I should have to find another companion for her; and
-you know how difficult that would be. I'm worried quite enough as it is.' A
-look of pain passed through his eyes, and Mrs. Bentley wondered what he he
-could mean. 'No,' he said, taking her hands, 'we are good friends--are we
-not? Do me this service. Stay with me until I finish this play; then, if
-things do not mend, go, if you like, but not now. Will you promise me?'
-
-'I promise.'
-
-'Thank you. I am deeply obliged to you.'
-
-At the end of a long silence, Hubert said, 'Will you not come up-stairs,
-and let me read you the first act?'
-
-'I should like to, but I think it better not. If Emily heard that you had
-read me your play, she would not close her eyes to-night; it would be tears
-and misery all the night through.'
-
-
-
-
-XVI
-
-
-The study in which he had determined to write his masterpiece had been
-fitted up with taste and care. The floor was covered with a rare Persian
-carpet, and the walls were lined with graceful bookcases of Chippendale
-design; the volumes, half morocco, calf, and the yellow paper of French
-novels, showed through the diamond panes. The writing-table stood in front
-of the window; like the bookcases, it was Chippendale, and on the dark
-mahogany the handsome silver inkstand seemed to invite literary
-composition. There was a scent of flowers in the room. Emily had filled a
-bowl of old china with some pale September roses. The curtains were made of
-a modern cretonne--their colour was similar to the bowl of roses; and the
-large couch on which Hubert lay was covered with the same material. On one
-wall there was a sea-piece by Courbet, and upon another a river landscape,
-with rosy-tinted evening sky, by Corot. The chimney-piece was set out with
-a large gilt timepiece, and candelabra in Dresden china. Hubert had bought
-these works of art on the occasion of his last visit to London, about two
-months ago.
-
-It was twelve o'clock. He had finished reading his second act, and the
-reading had been a bitter disappointment. The idea floated, pure and
-seductive, in his mind; but when he tried to reduce it to a precise shape
-upon paper, it seemed to escape in some vague, mysterious way. Enticingly,
-like a butterfly it fluttered before him; he followed like a child,
-eagerly--his brain set on the mazy flight. It led him through a country
-where all was promise of milk and honey. He followed, sure that the
-alluring spirit would soon choose a flower; then he would capture it. Often
-it seemed to settle. He approached with palpitating heart; but lo! when the
-net was withdrawn it was empty.
-
-A look of pain and perplexity came upon his face; he remembered the lodging
-at seven shillings a week in the Tottenham Court Road. He had suffered
-there; but it seemed to him that he was suffering more here. He had changed
-his surroundings, but he had not changed himself. Success and failure,
-despair and hope, joy and sorrow, lie within and not without us. His pain
-lay at his heart's root; he could not pluck it forth, and its gratification
-seemed more than ever impossible. He changed his position on the couch.
-Suddenly his thoughts said, 'Perhaps I am mistaken in the subject. Perhaps
-that is the reason. Perhaps there is no play to be extracted from it;
-perhaps it would be better to abandon it and choose another.' For a few
-seconds he scanned the literary horizon of his mind. 'No, no!' he said
-bitterly, 'this is the play I was born to write. No other subject is
-possible; I can think of nothing else. This is all I can feel or see.' It
-was the second act that now defied his efforts. It had once seemed clear
-and of exquisite proportions; now no second act seemed possible: the
-subject did not seem to admit of a second act; and, clasping his forehead
-with his hands, he strove to think it out.
-
-Any distraction from the haunting pain, now become chronic, is welcome, and
-he answers with a glad 'Come in!' the knock at the door.
-
-'I'm sorry,' said Mrs. Bentley, 'for disturbing you, but I should like to
-know what fish you would like for your dinner--soles, turbot, or whiting?
-Immersed in literary problems as you are, I daresay these details are very
-prosaic; but I notice that later in the day----'
-
-Hubert laughed. 'I find such details far more agreeable than literature. I
-can do nothing with my play.'
-
-'Aren't you getting on this morning?'
-
-'No, not very well.'
-
-'What do you think of turbot?'
-
-'I think turbot very nice. Emily likes turbot.'
-
-'Very well, then. I'll order turbot.'
-
-As Mrs. Bentley was about to withdraw, she said, 'I'm sorry you are not
-getting on. What stops you now? That second act?'
-
-'Come, you are not very busy. I'll read you the act as it stands, and then
-tell you how I think it ought to be altered. Nothing helps me so much as to
-talk it over; not only does it clear up my ideas, but it gives me desire to
-write. My best work has always been done in that way.'
-
-'I really don't think I can stay. If Emily heard that you had been reading
-your play to me----'
-
-'I'm tired of hearing of what Emily thinks. I can put up with a good deal,
-and I know that it is my duty to show much forbearance; but there is a
-limit to all things!' This was the first time Mrs. Bentley had seen him
-show either excitement or anger; she hardly knew him in this new aspect. In
-a moment the blonde calm of the Saxon had dropped from him, and some Celtic
-emphasis appeared in his speech. 'This hysterical girl,' he continued, 'is
-a sore burden. Tears about this, and sighs about that; fainting fits
-because I happen to take a chair next to yours. You may depend upon it our
-lives are already the constant gossip of the neighbourhood.'
-
-'I know it is very annoying; and I, I assure you, receive my share. Every
-look and word is misinterpreted. I must not stay here.'
-
-'You must not go! I really want you. I assure you that your opinion will be
-of value.'
-
-'But think of Emily. It will make her wretched if she hears of it. You do
-not know how it affects her. The slightest thing! You hardly see anything;
-I see it all.'
-
-'But there is no sense in it; it is pure madness. I'm writing a play,
-trying to work out a most difficult problem, and am in want of an audience,
-and I ask you if you will be kind enough to let me read you the act, and
-you cannot listen to it because--because--yes, that's just it--because!'
-
-'You do not know how she suffers. Let me go; spare her the pain.'
-
-'She is not the only one who suffers. Do you think that I don't suffer?
-I've set my heart--my very life is set on this play. I must get through
-with it; they are all waiting for it. My enemies say I cannot write it, but
-I shall if you will help me.'
-
-[Illustration: "Sometimes, in an exciting passage, the hands were
-clasped."]
-
-'Poor Emily's heart is equally broken. Her life is equally set----' Mrs.
-Bentley did not finish. Hubert just caught the words. Their significance
-struck him; he looked questioningly into Mrs. Bentley's eyes; then,
-pretending not to have understood, he begged her to remain. With the air of
-one who yields to a temptation, she came into the room. He felt strangely
-happy, and, drawing over an arm-chair for her, he threw himself on the
-couch. He noticed that she wore a loose white jacket, and once during the
-reading of the act he was conscious of a beautiful hand hanging over the
-rail of the chair. Sometimes, in an exciting passage, the hands were
-clasped. The black slippers and the slender black-stockinged ankles showed
-beneath the skirt; and when he raised his eyes from the manuscript, he saw
-the blonde face and hair, and the pale eyes were always fixed upon him. She
-listened with a keen and penetrating interest to his criticism of the act,
-agreeing with him generally, sometimes quietly contesting a point, and with
-some strange fascination drawing new and unexpected ideas from him; and in
-the intellectual warmth of her femininity his brain seemed to clear and his
-ideas took new shape.
-
-'Ah,' he said, after two hours' delightful talk, 'how much I'm indebted to
-you! At last I see my mistakes; in two days I shall have written the act.
-And he wrote rapidly for nearly two hours, reconstructing the opening
-scenes of his second act.' He then threw himself on the couch, smoked a
-cigar, and after half an hour's rest continued writing till dinner-time.
-
-When he came down-stairs, the thought of what he had been writing was still
-so vivid in him that he did not notice at once the silence of those with
-whom he was dining. He complimented Mrs. Bentley on the freshness of the
-turbot; she hardly answered; and then he became aware that something had
-gone wrong. What? Only one thing was possible. Emily had heard that Mrs.
-Bentley had been in his study. Looking from the woman to the girl, he saw
-that the latter had been weeping. She was still in a highly hysterical
-state, and might burst into tears and fly from the dinner-table at any
-moment. His face changed expression, and it was with difficulty that he
-restrained his temper. His life had been made up of a constant recurrence
-of these scenes, and he was wholly weary of them; and the thought of the
-absolute want of reason in the causeless jealousy, and the misery that
-these little bickerings made of his life, exasperated him beyond measure.
-The dinner proceeded in silence, and every slight remark was a presage of
-storm. Hubert hoped the girl would say nothing until the servant left the
-room, and with that view he never spoke a word except to ask the ladies
-what they would take to eat. These tactics might have succeeded if Mrs.
-Bentley had not unfortunately said that next week she intended to go to
-London for a couple of days. 'The Eastwicks are there now, and they've
-asked me to stay with them.'
-
-'I think I shall go up with you. I want to go to London,' said Emily.
-
-'It will be very nice if you'll come; but we cannot both stay with the
-Eastwicks; they have only one spare room.'
-
-'I suppose you'd like me to go to an hotel.'
-
-'My dear Emily, how can you think of such a thing? A young girl like you
-could not stay at an hotel alone. I shall be only too pleased if you will
-go to the Eastwicks; I will go to the hotel.'
-
-Emily's lip quivered, and in the irritating silence both Hubert and Mrs.
-Bentley saw that she was trying to overcome her passion. They fervently
-hoped she would succeed; for at that moment the servant was handing round
-the wine, and the time he took to accomplish this service seemed endless.
-He had filled the last glass, had handed round the dessert, and was
-preparing to leave the room when Emily said--
-
-'The hotel will suit you very well. You'll be free to see Hubert whenever
-you like.'
-
-Hubert looked up quickly, hoping Mrs. Bentley would not answer, but before
-he could make a sign she said--
-
-'What do you mean, Emily? I did not know that Hubert was going to London.'
-
-'You hardly expect me to believe that, do you?'
-
-The servant was still in the room; but no look of astonishment appeared on
-his face, and Hubert hoped he had not heard. An awful silence glowered upon
-the dinner-table. The moment the door closed Hubert said, turning angrily
-to Emily--
-
-'Really, I am quite surprised, Emily, that you should make such
-observations in the presence of servants! This has been going on quite long
-enough; you are making the house intolerable. I shall not be able to live
-here any longer.'
-
-Emily burst into a passionate flood of tears. She declared she was
-wretchedly miserable, and that she fully understood that Hubert had begun
-to regret that he had asked her to stay at Ashwood. Everything had been
-taken from her; every one was against her. Her sobs shook her frail little
-frame as if they would break it, and Hubert's heart was wrung at the sight
-of such genuine suffering.
-
-'My dear Emily, I assure you you are mistaken. We both love you very much.'
-He got up from his chair, and, putting his arm about her, besought her to
-dry her eyes; but she shook him passionately from her, and fled from the
-room.
-
-Three days after, Emily tore up one of her songs, because Mrs. Bentley had
-sung it without her leave. And so on and so on, week after week. No sooner
-was one quarrel allayed than signs of another began to appear. Hubert
-despaired. 'How is this to end?' he asked himself every day. Mrs. Bentley
-begged him to cancel her promise, and allow her to go. But that was
-impossible. He could not remain alone with Emily; if he left her she would
-not fail to believe that he had gone after her rival. The situation had
-become so tense that they ended by discussing these questions almost
-without reserve. To make matters worse, Emily had begun visibly to lose her
-health. There was neither colour in her cheeks nor light in her eyes; she
-hardly slept at all, and had grown more than ever like a little shadow. The
-doctor had been summoned, and, after prescribing a tonic, had advised quiet
-and avoidance of all excitement. Therefore Hubert and Mrs. Bentley agreed
-never to meet except when Emily was present, and then strove to speak as
-little as possible to each other. But the very fact of having to restrain
-themselves in looks, glances, and every slightest word--for Emily
-misinterpreted all things--whetted their appetites for each other's
-society.
-
-In the misery of his study, when he watched the sheet of paper, he often
-sought relief in remembrance of her sweet manner, and the happy morning he
-had spent in her companionship. What he had written under the direct
-influence of her inspiration still seemed to him to be less bad than the
-rest of his play; and he began to feel sure that, if ever this play were
-written, it would be written in the benign charm of her sweet
-encouragement, in the reposeful shadow of her presence. But that presence
-was forbidden him--that presence that seemed so necessary; and for what
-reason? Turning on the circumstances of his life, he raged against them,
-declaring that it would be folly to allow his very life's desire to be
-frittered away to gratify a young girl's caprice,--a caprice which in a few
-years she would laugh at. And whenever he was not thinking of his play, he
-remembered the charm of Mrs. Bentley's company, and the beneficent effect
-it had on his work. He had never known a woman he had liked so much, and he
-felt--he started at the thought, so like an inspiration did it seem to
-him--that the only possible solution of the present situation was his
-marriage with her. Once he was married, Emily would soon learn to forget
-him. They would take her up to London for the season; and, amid the healthy
-excitement of balls and parties, her girlish fancy would evaporate. No
-doubt she would meet again the young cavalry officer whose addresses she
-had received so coldly. She would be sure to meet him again--be sure to
-think him the most charming man in the world; they would marry, and she
-would make him the best possible wife. The kindest action they could do
-Emily would be to marry. There was nothing else to do, and they must do
-something, or else the girl would die. It seemed wonderful to Hubert that
-he had not thought of all this before. 'It is the very obvious solution of
-the problem,' he said; and his heart beat as he heard Mrs. Bentley's step
-in the corridor. It died away in the distance; but a few days after, when
-he heard it again, he jumped from his chair, and ran to the door. 'Come,'
-he said, 'I want to speak to you.'
-
-'No, no, I beg of you!'
-
-'I must speak to you!' He laid his hand upon her arm, and said, 'I beg of
-you. I have something to say--it is of great importance. Come in.'
-
-They looked at each other a moment, and it seemed as if they could see into
-each other's souls. Then a look of yielding passed into her eyes, and she
-said--
-
-'Well, what is it?'
-
-The familiarity of the words struck her, and she saw by the kindling
-tenderness in his eyes that they had given him pleasure. She almost knew he
-was going to tell her that he loved her. He looked towards the open door,
-and, guessing his intention, she said--
-
-'Don't shut it! Speak quickly. Remember that she may pass at any moment.
-Were she to find us together, she would suffer; it would be tears and
-reproaches. What you have to say to me is about her?'
-
-'Of course; we never speak of anything else. But we must not be overheard.
-I must shut the door.' She noticed a certain embarrassment in his manner.
-Suddenly relinquishing his intention to take her hands, he said--
-
-'This cannot go on; our lives are being made unbearable. You agree with
-me--do you not?'
-
-'Yes,' she said, with a curious inquiring look in her eyes. 'You had better
-let me leave. It is the only way out of the difficulty.'
-
-'You know very well, Julia, that that is impossible.'
-
-It was the first time he had used her Christian name, and she knew now he
-was going to ask her to marry him. A frightened look passed into her face;
-she turned from him; he took her hands.
-
-'No, Julia,' he said; 'there is another and better way out of the
-difficulty. You will stop here--you will be my wife?' Reading the look of
-pain that had come into her eyes, he said, 'You will not refuse me? I want
-you--I can do nothing without you. If you leave me, I shall never be able
-to write my play; it can only be written under your influence. I love you,
-Julia!' She allowed him to draw her towards him, and then she broke away.
-
-'Oh,' she said, 'why do you say these things? You only make my task harder.
-You know that I cannot betray my friend. Why do you tempt me to do a
-dishonourable action?'
-
-'A dishonourable action! What do you mean? It is the only way to save her.
-Once we are married, she will forget. No doubt she will shed a few tears;
-but to save the body we must often lose a limb. It is even so. Things
-cannot go on as they are. We cannot watch her withering away under our very
-eyes; and that is what is actually happening. I have thought it all over,
-considered it from every point of view, and have come to the conclusion
-that--that, well, that we had better marry. You must have seen that I
-always liked you. I did not myself know how much until a few days ago. Say
-that I am not wholly disagreeable to you.'
-
-'No; I will not listen to you! My conscience tells me plainly where my duty
-lies. Not for all the world will I play Emily false. I shudder to think of
-such a thing; it would be the basest ingratitude. I owe everything to her.
-When I hadn't a penny in the world, and when in my homelessness I wrote to
-Mr. Burnett, she pleaded in my favour, and decided him to take me as a
-companion. No, no! a thousand times no! Let go my hands. Do you not know
-what it is to be loyal?'
-
-'I hope I do. But, as I have explained, it is the only solution. The
-romantic attachments of young girls, unless nipped in the bud, often end
-fatally. Do you not see how ill she is looking? She is wearing her life
-away. We shall be acting in her best interests. Besides, she is not the
-only person to be considered. Do I not love you? Are you not the very woman
-whose influence, whose guidance, is necessary, so that I should succeed?
-Without your help I shall never write my play. A woman's influence is
-necessary to every undertaking. The greatest writers owe their best
-inspiration to----'
-
-'Her heart is as closely set upon you as yours is upon your play.'
-
-'But,' cried Hubert, 'I do not love her! Under no circumstances would I
-marry her. That I swear to you. If she and I were alone on a desert
-island----'
-
-Julia looked at him one moment doubtingly, inquiringly. Then she said--
-
-'Hers is no evanescent fancy, but a passion that goes to the very roots of
-her nature, and will kill her if it be not satisfied.'
-
-'Or cut out in time.'
-
-'I must leave.'
-
-'That will not mend matters.'
-
-'My departure will, at all events, remove all cause for jealousy; and when
-I am gone you may learn to love her.'
-
-'No; that I swear is impossible!'
-
-'You very likely think so now; but I'm bound to give her every chance of
-winning you.'
-
-'I say again that that is impossible! I have never seen a woman except
-yourself I could marry. I tell you so: believe me as you like.... In this
-matter you are acting like a woman,--you allow your emotions and not your
-intellect to lead you. By acting thus, you are certainly sacrificing two
-lives--hers and mine. Of your own I do not speak, not knowing what is
-passing in your heart; but if by any chance you should care for me, you are
-adding your own happiness to the general holocaust.' Neither spoke again
-for some time.
-
-'Why should you not marry her?' Julia said, at the end of a long silence.
-'Some people think her quite a pretty girl.'
-
-The lovers looked at each other and smiled sadly. And then, in pathetic
-phrases, Hubert tried to explain why he could never love Emily. He spoke of
-his age, and of difference of tastes,--he liked clever women. The
-conversation fell. At the end of a long silence, Julia said--
-
-'There is nothing for it but my departure, and the sooner the better.'
-
-'You are not in earnest? You are surely not in earnest?'
-
-'Yes, indeed I am.'
-
-'Then, if you go, you must take her with you. She cannot remain here alone
-with me. And even if she could, I could not live with her. Her folly has
-destroyed any liking I may have ever had for her. You'll have to take her
-with you.'
-
-'She would not come with me. I spoke to her once of a trip abroad.'
-
-'And she refused?'
-
-'She said she only wanted things to go on just as they are.'
-
-
-
-
-XVII
-
-
-In some trepidation Julia knocked. Receiving no reply, she opened the door,
-and her candle burnt in what a moment before must have been inky darkness.
-Emily lay on her bed--on the edge of it; and the only movement she made was
-to avert her eyes from the light. 'What! all alone in this darkness,
-Emily!... Shall I light your candles?' She had to repeat the question
-before she could get an answer.
-
-'No, thank you; I want nothing; I have no wish to see anything. I like the
-dark.'
-
-'Have you been asleep?'
-
-'No; I have not.... Why do you come to torment me? It cannot matter to you
-whether I lie in the dark or the light. Oh, take that candle away! it is
-blinding me.' Julia put the candle on the washstand. Then full of pity for
-the grieving girl, she stood, her hand resting on the bed-rail.
-
-'Aren't you coming down to dinner, Emily? Come, let me pour out some water
-for you. When you have bathed your eyes----'
-
-'I don't want any dinner.'
-
-'It will look very strange if you remain in your room the whole evening.
-You do not want to vex him, do you?'
-
-'I suppose he is very angry with me. But I did not mean to vex him. Is he
-very angry?'
-
-'No, he is not angry at all; he is merely distressed. You distress him
-dreadfully when----'
-
-'I don't know why I should distress him. I'm sure I don't mean to. You know
-more about it than I. You are always whispering together--talking about
-me.'
-
-'I assure you, Emily, you are mistaken. Mr. Price and I have no secrets
-whatever.'
-
-'Why should you tell me these falsehoods? They make me so miserable.'
-
-'Falsehoods, Emily! When did you ever know me to tell a falsehood?'
-
-'You say you have no secrets! Do you think I am blind? You think, I
-suppose, I did not see you showing him a ring? You took it off, too; and I
-suppose you gave it to him,--an engagement ring, very likely.'
-
-'I lost a stone from my ring, and I asked Mr. Price if he would take the
-ring to London and have the stone replaced.... That is all. So you see how
-your imagination has run away with you.'
-
-Emily did not answer. At last she said, breaking the silence abruptly--
-
-'Is he very angry? Has he gone to his study? Do you think he will come down
-to dinner?'
-
-'I suppose he'll come down for dinner.'
-
-'Will you go and ask him?'
-
-'I hardly see how I can do that. He is very busy.... And if you would
-listen to any advice of mine, it would be to leave him to himself as much
-as possible for the present. He is so taken up with his play; I know he's
-most anxious about it.'
-
-'Is he? I don't know. He never speaks to me about it. I hate that play, and
-I hate to see him go up to that study! I cannot understand why he should
-trouble himself about writing plays; he doesn't want the money, and it
-can't be agreeable sitting up there all alone thinking.... It is easy to
-see that it only makes him unhappy. But you encourage him to go on with it.
-Oh yes, you do; there's no use saying you don't. You are always talking to
-him about it; you bring the conversation up. You think I don't see how you
-do it, but I do; and you like doing it, because then you have him all to
-yourself. I can't talk to him about that play; and I wouldn't if I could,
-for it only makes him unhappy. But you don't care whether he's unhappy or
-not; you only think of yourself.'
-
-'You surely don't believe what you are saying is true? To-morrow you will
-be sorry for what you have said. You cannot think that I would deceive you,
-Emily? Remember what friends we have been.'
-
-'I remember everything. You think I don't; but I do. And you think also
-that there's no reason why I should be miserable; but there is. Because you
-do not feel my misery, you think it doesn't exist. I daresay you think,
-too, that you are very good and kind; but you aren't. You think you deceive
-me; but you don't. I know all that is passing between you and Hubert. I
-know a great deal more than I can explain....'
-
-'But tell me, Emily, what is it you suspect? What do you accuse me of?'
-
-'I accuse you of nothing. Can't you understand that things may go wrong
-without it being any one's fault in particular?'
-
-Julia wondered how Emily could think so wisely. She seemed to have grown
-wiser in her grief. But grief helped her no further in her instinctive
-perception of the truth, and she resumed her puerile attack on her friend.
-
-'Nothing has gone well with me ever since you came here. I was
-disinherited; and I daresay you were glad, for you knew that if the money
-did not come to me it would go to Hubert, and I do know----'
-
-'What are you saying, Emily? I never heard of such wild accusations before!
-You know very well that I never set eyes on Mr. Price until he came down
-here.'
-
-'How should I know what you know or don't know? But I know that all my life
-every one has been plotting against me. And I cannot make out why. I never
-did harm to any one.'
-
-The conversation paused. Emily flung herself back on the pillow. Not even a
-sob. The candle burned like a long yellow star in the shadows, yielding
-only sufficient light for Julia to see the outlines of a somewhat untidy
-room,--an old-fashioned mahogany wardrobe, cloudy and black, upon
-old-fashioned grey paper, some cardboard boxes, and a number of china
-ornaments, set out on a small table covered with a tablecloth in
-crewel-work.
-
-'I would do anything in the world for you, Emily. I am your best friend,
-and yet----'
-
-'I have no friend. I don't believe in friends. You think people are your
-friends, and then you find they are not.'
-
-'How can I convince you of the injustice of your suspicions?'
-
-'I see all plainly enough; it is fate, I suppose.... Selfishness. We all
-think of ourselves--we can't help it; and that's what makes life so
-miserable.... He would be a very good match. You have got him to like you.
-Perhaps you didn't intend to; but you have done it all the same.'
-
-'But, Emily dear, listen! There is no question of marriage between me and
-Mr. Price. If you will only have patience, things will come right in the
-end.'
-
-'For you, perhaps.'
-
-'Emily, Emily! ... You should try to understand things better.'
-
-'I feel them, even if I don't understand.'
-
-'Admit that you were wrong about the ring. Have I not convinced you that
-you were wrong?'
-
-Emily did not answer. But at the end of a long silence, in which she had
-been pursuing a different train of thought, she said, 'Then you mean that
-he has never asked you to marry him?'
-
-The directness of the question took Julia by surprise, and, falsehood being
-unnatural to her, she hesitated, hardly knowing what to answer. Her
-hesitation was only momentary; but in that moment there came up such a wave
-of pity for the grief-stricken girl that she lied for pity's sake, 'No, he
-never asked me to marry him. I assure you that he never did. If you do not
-believe me----' As she was about to say, 'I will swear it if you like,' an
-irresponsible sensation of pride in her ownership of his love surged up
-through her, overwhelming her will, and she ended the sentence, 'I am very
-sorry, but I cannot help it.'
-
-The words were still well enough; it was in the accent that the truth
-transpired. And then yielding still further to the force which had
-subjugated her will, she said--
-
-'I admit that we have talked about a great many things.' (Again she strove
-not to speak, but the words rose red-hot to her lips.) 'He has said that he
-would like to marry, but I should not think of accepting----'
-
-'Then it is just as I thought!' Emily cried; 'he wants to get rid of me!'
-
-Julia was shocked and surprised at the depth of disgraceful vanity and
-cowardice which special circumstances had brought within her consciousness.
-The Julia Bentley of the last few moments was not the Julia Bentley she was
-accustomed to meet and interrogate, and she asked herself how she might
-exorcise the meanness that had so unexpectedly appeared in her. Should she
-pile falsehood on falsehood? She felt it would be cruel not to do so; but
-Emily said, 'He wants to marry to get rid of me, and not because he loves
-you.' Then it was hard to deny herself the pleasure of telling the whole
-truth; but she mastered her desire of triumph, and, actuated by nothing but
-sincerest love and pity, she said--
-
-'Oh, Emily dear, he never asked me to marry him; he does not love me at
-all! Why will you not believe me?'
-
-'Because I cannot!' she cried passionately. 'I only ask to be left alone.'
-
-'A little patience, Emily, and all will come right. Mr. Price does not want
-to get rid of you. You wrong him just as you wrong me. He has often said
-how much he likes you; indeed he has.' Although speaking from the bottom of
-her heart, it seemed to Julia that she was playing the part of a cruel,
-false woman, who was designingly plotting to betray a helpless girl; and
-not understanding why this was so, she was at once puzzled and confused. It
-seemed to her that she was being borne on in a wind of destiny, and her
-will seemed to beat vainly against it, like a bird's wings when a storm is
-blowing. She was conscious of a curious powerlessness; it surprised her,
-and she could not understand why she continued talking, so vain and useless
-did words seem to her--an idle patter. She continued--
-
-'You think that I stand between you and Mr. Price. Now, I assure you that
-it is not so. I tell you I should refuse Mr. Price, even if he were to ask
-me to marry him, here, at this very moment. I pledge you my word on this.
-Give me your hand, Emily. You will not refuse it?' Emily gave her hand. 'It
-is quite ridiculous to promise, for he will never ask me; but I promise not
-to marry him even if he should ask me.' She gave the promise, determined to
-keep it; and yet she knew she would not keep it. She argued passionately
-with herself, a prey to an inward dread; for no matter how firmly she
-forced resolution upon resolution, they all seemed to melt in her soul like
-snow on a blazing fire. Then, determined to rid herself of a numb sensation
-of powerlessness, and achieve the end she desired, she said, 'I'll tell
-you, Emily, what I'll do. I'll not stay here; I will go away. Let me go
-away, dear, and then it will be all right.'
-
-'No, no! you mustn't leave; I don't want you to leave. It would be said
-everywhere that I had you sent away.... You promise me not to leave?'
-Raising herself, Emily clung to Julia's arm, detaining her until she had
-extorted the desired promise.
-
-'Very well; I promise,' she said sadly. 'But I think you are wrong; indeed
-I do. I have always thought that "the only solution of the problem" was my
-departure.' Memory had betrayed her into Hubert's own phrase.
-
-'Why should you go? You think, I suppose, that I'm in love with Hubert? I'm
-not. All I want is for things to go on just the same--for us to be friends
-as we were before.'
-
-'Very well, Emily--very well.... But in the meantime you must not neglect
-your meals as you have been doing lately. If you don't take care, you'll
-lose your health and your looks. I have been noticing how thin you are
-looking.'
-
-'I suppose you have told him that I am looking thin and ill.... Men like
-tall, big, healthy women like you--don't they?'
-
-'I see, Emily, that it is hopeless; every word one utters is
-misinterpreted. Dinner will be ready in a few minutes; or, if you like, I
-will dine up-stairs; and you and Mr. Price----'
-
-'But is he coming down to dinner? I thought you said he had gone to his
-study; sometimes he dines there.'
-
-'I can tell you nothing about Mr. Price. I don't know whether he'll dine
-up-stairs or down.'
-
-At that moment a knock was heard at the door, and the servant announced
-that dinner was ready. 'Mr. Price has sent down word, ma'am, that he is
-very busy writing; he hopes you'll excuse him, and he'll be glad if you
-will send him his dinner up on a tray.'
-
-'Very well; I shall be down directly.'
-
-The slight interruption had sufficed to calm Julia's irritation, and she
-stood waiting for Emily. But seeing that she showed no signs of moving, she
-said, 'Aren't you coming down to dinner, Emily?' It was a sense of strict
-duty that impelled the question, for her heart sank at the prospect of
-spending the evening alone with the girl. But seeing the tears on Emily's
-cheeks, she sat down beside her, and said, 'Dearest Emily, if you would
-only confide in me!'
-
-'There's nothing to confide....'
-
-'You mustn't give way like this; you really mustn't. Come down and have
-some dinner.'
-
-'It is no use; I couldn't eat anything.'
-
-'He may come into the drawing-room in the course of the evening, and will
-be so disappointed and grieved to hear that you have not been down.'
-
-'No; he will spend the whole evening in his room; we shall not see him
-again.'
-
-'But if I go and ask him to come; if I tell him----'
-
-'No; do not speak to him about me; he'd only say that I was interfering
-with his work.'
-
-'That is unjust, Emily; he has never reproached you with interfering with
-his work. Shall I go and tell him that you won't come down because you
-think he is angry with you?'
-
-Ten minutes passed, and no answer could be obtained from Emily--only
-passionate and illusive refusals, denials, prayer to be left alone; and
-these mingled with irritating suggestions that Julia had better go at once,
-that Hubert might be waiting for her. But Julia bore patiently with her and
-did not leave her until Hubert sent to know why his dinner was delayed.
-
-Emily had begun to undress; and, tearing off her things, she hardly took
-more than five minutes to get into bed.
-
-'Shall I light a candle?' Julia asked before leaving.
-
-'No, thank you.'
-
-'Shall I send you up some soup?'
-
-'No; I could not touch it.'
-
-'You are not going to remain in the dark? Let me light a night-light?'
-
-'No, thank you; I like the dark.'
-
-
-
-
-XVIII
-
-
-Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood by the chimney-piece in the drawing-room,
-waiting for the doctor; they had left him with Emily, and stood facing each
-other absorbed in thought, when the door opened, and the doctor entered.
-Hubert said--
-
-'What do you think, Doctor? Is she seriously ill?'
-
-'There is nothing, so far as I can make out, organically the matter with
-her, but the system is running down. She is very thin and weak. I shall
-prescribe a tonic, but----'
-
-'But what, doctor?'
-
-'She seems to be suffering from extreme depression of spirits. Do you know
-of any secret grief--any love affair? At her age, anything of that sort
-fills the entire mind, and the consequences are often grave.'
-
-'And supposing it were so, what would be your advice? Change of air and
-scene?'
-
-'Certainly.'
-
-'Have you spoken to her on the subject?'
-
-'Yes; but she says she will not leave Ashwood.'
-
-'We cannot send her away by force. What would you advise us to do?'
-
-'There's nothing to be done. We must hope for the best. There is no
-immediate cause for fear.... But, by the way, she looks as if she suffered
-from sleeplessness.'
-
-'Yes, she does; but she has been ordered chloral. Any harm in that?'
-
-'In her case, it is a necessity; but do you think she takes it?'
-
-'Oh yes, she has been taking choral.'
-
-The conversation paused; the doctor went over to the writing-table, wrote a
-prescription, made a few remarks, and took his leave, announcing his
-intention of returning that day fortnight.
-
-Hubert said, and his tone implied reference to some anterior conversation,
-'We are powerless in this matter. You see we can do nothing. We only
-succeed in making ourselves unhappy; we do not change in anything. I am
-wretchedly unhappy!'
-
-'Believe me,' she said, raising her arms in a beautiful feminine movement,
-'I do not wish to make you unhappy.'
-
-'Then why do you persist? Why do you refuse to take the only step that may
-lead us out of this difficulty?'
-
-'How can you ask me? Oh, Hubert, I did not think you could be so cruel! It
-would be a shameful action.'
-
-It was the first time she had used his Christian name, and his face changed
-expression.
-
-'I cannot,' she said, 'and I will not, and I do not understand how you can
-ask me--you who are so loyal, how can you ask me to be disloyal?'
-
-'Spare me your reproaches. Fate has been cruel. I have never told you the
-story of my life. I have suffered deeply; my pride has been humiliated, and
-I have endured hunger and cold; but those sufferings were light compared to
-this last misfortune.'
-
-She looked at him with sublime pity in her eyes. 'I do not conceal from
-you,' she said, 'that I love you very much. I, too, have suffered, and I
-had thought for one moment that fate had vouchsafed me happiness; but, as
-you would say--the irony of life.'
-
-'Julia, do not say you never will?'
-
-'We cannot look into the future. But this I can say--I will not do Emily
-any wrong, and so far as is in my power I will avoid giving her pain. There
-is only one way out of this difficulty. I must leave this house as soon as
-I can persuade her to let me go.'
-
-The door opened; involuntarily the speakers moved apart; and though their
-faces and attitudes were strictly composed when Emily entered, she knew
-they had been standing closer together.
-
-'I'm afraid I'm interrupting you,' she said.
-
-'No, Emily; pray do not go away. We were only talking about you.'
-
-'If I were to leave every time you begin to talk about me, I should spend
-my life in my room. I daresay you have many faults to find. Let me hear all
-about your fresh discoveries.'
-
-It was a thin November day: leaves were whirling on the lawn, and at that
-moment one blew rustling down the window-pane. And, even as it, she seemed
-a passing thing. Her face was like a plate of fine white porcelain, and the
-deep eyes filled it with a strange and magnetic pathos; the abundant
-chestnut hair hung in the precarious support of a thin tortoiseshell; and
-there was something unforgetable in the manner in which her aversion for
-the elder woman betrayed itself--a mere nothing, and yet more impressive
-than any more obvious and therefore more vulgar expression of dislike would
-have been.
-
-'A little patience, Emily. You will not have me here much longer.'
-
-'I suppose that I am so disagreeable that you cannot live with me. Why
-should you go away?'
-
-'My dear Emily, you must not excite yourself. The doctor----'
-
-'I want to know why she said she was going to leave. Has she been
-complaining about me to you? What is her reason for wanting to go?'
-
-'We do not get on together as we used to--that is all, Emily. I can please
-you no longer.'
-
-'It is not my fault if we do not get on. I don't see why we shouldn't, and
-I do not want you to go.'
-
-'Emily, dear, everything shall be as you like it.'
-
-The girl looked at him with the shy, doubting look of an animal that would
-like, and still does not dare, to go to the beckoning hand. How frail
-seemed the body in the black dress! and how thin the arms in the black
-sleeves! Hubert took the little hand in his. At his touch a look of content
-and rest passed into her eyes, and she yielded herself as the leaf yields
-to the wind. She was all his when he chose. Mrs. Bentley left the room;
-and, seeing her go, a light of sudden joy illuminated the thin, pale face;
-and when the door closed, and she was alone with him, the bleak, unhappy
-look, which had lately grown strangely habitual to her, faded out of her
-face and eyes. He fetched her shawl, and took her hand again in his,
-knowing that by so doing he made her happy. He could not refuse her the
-peace from pain that these attentions brought her, though he would have
-held himself aloof from all women but one. She knew the truth well enough;
-but they who suffer much think only of the cessation of pain. He wondered
-at the inveigling content that introduced itself into her voice, face, and
-gesture. Settling herself comfortably on the sofa, she said--
-
-'Now tell me what the doctor said. Did he say I would soon recover? Did he
-say that I was very bad? Tell me all.'
-
-'He said that you ought to have a change--that you should go south
-somewhere.'
-
-'And you agree with him that I ought to go away?'
-
-'Is he not the best judge?--the doctor's orders!'
-
-'Then you, too, have learnt to hate me. You, too, want to send me away?'
-
-'My dear Emily, I only want to do as you like. You asked me what the doctor
-said, and I told you.'
-
-Hubert got up and walked aside. He passed his hand across his eyes. He
-could hardly contain himself; the emotion that discussion with this sick
-girl caused him went to his head. She looked at him curiously, watching his
-movement, and he failed to understand what pleasure it could give her to
-have him by her side, knowing, as she clearly did, that his heart was
-elsewhere. Turning suddenly, he said--
-
-'But tell me, Emily, how are you feeling? You are, after all, the best
-judge.'
-
-'I feel rather weak. I should get strong enough if----'
-
-She paused, as if waiting for Hubert to ask her to finish the sentence. But
-he hurriedly turned the conversation.
-
-'The doctor said you looked as if you had not had any sleep for several
-nights. I told him that that was strange, for you were taking chloral.'
-
-'I sleep well enough,' she said. 'But sometimes life seems so sad, that I
-do not think I shall be able to bear with it any longer. You do not know
-how unfortunate I have been. When I was a child, father and mother used to
-quarrel always, and I was the only child. That was why Mr. Burnett asked me
-to come and live at Ashwood. I came at first on a visit; and when father
-and mother died, he said he wished to adopt me. I thought he loved me; but
-his love was only selfishness. No one has ever loved me. I feel so utterly
-alone in this world--that is why I am unhappy.'
-
-Her eyes filled with tears, and at the sight of her tears Hubert's feelings
-were overwrought, and again he had to walk aside. He would give her all
-things; but she was dying for him, and he could not save her. No longer was
-there any disguisement between them. The words they uttered were as
-nothing, so clearly did the thought shine out of their eyes, 'I am dying of
-love for you,' and then the answer, 'I know that is so, and I cannot help
-it.' Her whole soul was spoken in her eyes, and he felt that his eyes
-betrayed him equally plainly. They stood in a sort of mental nakedness. The
-woman no longer sought for words to cover herself with; the man did, but he
-did not find them. They had not spoken for some time; they had been
-thinking of each other. At last she said, and with the querulous perversity
-of the sick---
-
-'But even if I wished to go abroad, with whom could I go?'
-
-Hubert fell into the trap, and, noticing the sudden brightness in his eyes,
-a cloud of disappointment shadowed hers. 'Of course, with Mrs. Bentley. I
-assure you, my dear Emily, that you----'
-
-'No, no, I am not mistaken! She hates me, and I cannot bear her. It is she
-who is making me ill.'
-
-'Hate you! Why should she hate you?'
-
-Emily did not reply. Hubert watched her, noticing the pallor of her cheek,
-so entirely white and blue, hardly a touch of warm colour anywhere, even in
-the shadow of the heavy hair.
-
-'I would give anything to see you friends again.'
-
-'That is impossible! I can never be friends with Julia as I once was. She
-has---- No, never can we be friends again. But why do you always take her
-part against me? That is what grieves me most. If only you thought----'
-
-'Emily dear, these are but idle fancies. You are mistaken.'
-
-The conversation fell. The girl lay quite still, her hands clasped across
-the shawl, her little foot stretched beyond the limp black dress, the hem
-of which fell over the edge of the grey sofa. Hubert sat by her on a low
-chair, and he looked into the fire, whose light wavered over the walls, now
-and again bringing the face of one of the pictures out of the darkness. The
-wind whined about the windows. Then, speaking as if out of a dream, Emily
-said--
-
-'Julia and I can never be friends again--that is impossible.'
-
-'But what has she done?' Hubert asked incautiously, regretting his words as
-soon as he had uttered them.
-
-'What has she done?' she said, looking at him curiously. 'Well, one thing,
-she has got it reported that--that I am in love with you, and that that is
-the reason of my illness.'
-
-'I am sure she never said any such thing. You are entirely mistaken. Mrs.
-Bentley is incapable of such wickedness.'
-
-'A woman, when she is jealous, will say anything. If she did not say it,
-can you tell me how it got about?'
-
-'I don't believe any one ever said such a thing.'
-
-'Oh yes, lots have said so--things come back to me. Julia always was
-jealous of me. She cannot bear me to speak to you. Have you not noticed how
-she follows us? Do you think she would have left the room just now if she
-could have helped it?'
-
-'If you think this is so, had she not better leave?'
-
-Emily did not answer at once. Motionless she lay on the sofa, looking at
-the grey November day with vague eyes that bespoke an obsession of
-hallucination. Suddenly she said, 'I do not want her to go away. She would
-spread a report that I was jealous of her, and had asked you to send her
-away. No; it would not be wise to send her away. Besides,' she said, fixing
-her eyes, now full of melancholy reproach, 'you would like her to remain.'
-
-'I have said before, Emily, and I assure you I am speaking the truth, I
-want you to do what you like. Say what you wish to be done, and it shall be
-done.'
-
-'Is that really true? I thought no one cared for me. You must care for me a
-little to speak like that.'
-
-'Of course I care for you, Emily.'
-
-'I sometimes think you might have if it had not been for that play; for, of
-course, I'm not clever, and cannot discuss it with you.... Julia, I
-suppose, can--that is the reason why you like her. Am I not right?'
-
-'Mrs. Bentley is a clever woman, who has read a great deal, and I like to
-talk an act over with her before I write it.'
-
-'Is that all? Then why do people say you are going to marry her?'
-
-'But nobody ever said so.'
-
-'Oh yes, they have. Is it true?'
-
-'No, Emily; it is not true.'
-
-'Are you quite sure?'
-
-'Yes, quite sure.'
-
-'If that is so,' she said, turning her eyes on Hubert, and looking as if
-she could see right down into his soul, 'I shall get well very soon. Then
-we can go on just the same; but if you married her, I----'
-
-'I what?'
-
-'Nothing! I feel quite happy now. I did not want you to marry her. I could
-not bear it. It would be like having a step-mother--worse, for she would
-not have me here at all; she would drive me away.'
-
-Hubert shook his head.
-
-'You don't know Julia as well as I do. However, it is no use discussing
-what is not going to be. You have been very nice to-day. If you would be
-always nice, as you are to-day, I should soon get well.'
-
-Her pale profile seemed very sharp in the fading twilight, and her delicate
-arms and thin bosom were full of the charm and fascination of deciduous
-things. She turned her face and looked at Hubert. 'You have made me very
-happy. I am content.'
-
-He was afraid to look back at her, lest she should, in her subtle, wilful
-manner, read the thought that was passing in his soul. Even now she seemed
-to read it. She seemed conscious of his pity for her. So little would give
-her happiness, and that little was impossible. His heart was irreparably
-another's. But though Emily's eyes seemed to know all, they seemed to say,
-'What matter? I regret nothing, only let things remain as they are.' And
-then her voice said--
-
-'I think I could sleep a little; happiness has brought me sleep. Don't go
-away. I shall not be asleep long.' She looked at him, and dozed, and then
-fell asleep. Hubert waited till her breathing grew deeper; then he laid the
-hand he held in his by her side, and stole on tiptoe from the room.
-
-The strain of the interview had become too intense; the house was
-unbearable. He went into the air. The November sky was drawing into wintry
-night; the grey clouds darkened, clinging round the long plain,
-overshadowing it, blotting out colour, leaving nothing but the severe green
-of the park, and the yellow whirling of dishevelled woods.
-
-'I must,' he said to himself, 'think no more about it. I shall go mad if I
-do. Nature will find her own solution. God grant that it may be a merciful
-one! I can do nothing.' And to escape from useless consideration, to
-release his overwrought brain, he hastened his steps, extending his walk
-through the farthest woods. As he approached the lodge gate he came upon
-Mrs. Bentley. She stood, her back turned from him, leaning on the gate, her
-thoughts lost in the long darkness of autumnal fields and woods.
-
-'Julia!'
-
-'You have left Emily. How did you leave her?'
-
-'She is fast asleep on the sofa. She fell asleep. Then why should I remain?
-The house was unbearable. She went to sleep, saying she felt very happy.'
-
-'Really! What induced such a change in her? Did you----'
-
-'No; I did not ask her to marry me; but I was able to tell her that I was
-not going to marry you, and that seemed entirely to satisfy her.'
-
-'Did she ask you?'
-
-'Yes. And when I told her I was not, she said that that was all she wanted
-to know--that she would soon get well now. How we human beings thrive in
-each other's unhappiness!'
-
-'Quite true, and we have been reproaching ourselves for our selfishness.'
-
-'Yes, and hers is infinitely greater. She is quite satisfied not to be
-happy herself, so long as she can make sure of our unhappiness. And what is
-so strange is her utter unconsciousness of her own fantastic and hardly
-conceivable selfishness.... It is astonishing!'
-
-'She is very young, and the young are naturally egotistic.'
-
-'Possibly. Still, it is hardly more agreeable to encounter. Come, let's go
-for a walk; and, above all things, let's talk no more about Emily.'
-
-The roads were greasy, and the hedges were torn and worn with incipient
-winter, and when they dipped the town appeared, a reddish-brown mass in the
-blue landscape. Hubert thought of his play and his love; but not
-separately--they seemed to him now as one indissoluble, indivisible thing;
-and he told her that he never would be able to write it without her
-assistance. That she might be of use to him in his work was singularly
-sweet to hear, and the thought reached to the end of her heart, causing her
-to smile sadly, and argue vainly, and him to reply querulously. They walked
-for about a mile; and then, wearied with sad expostulation, the
-conversation fell, and at the end of a long silence Julia said--
-
-'I think we had better turn back.'
-
-The suggestion filled Hubert's heart with rushing pain, and he answered--
-
-'Why should we return? I cannot go back to that girl. Oh, the miserable
-life we are leading!'
-
-'What can we do? We must go back; we cannot live in a tent by the wayside.
-We have no tent to set up.'
-
-'Come to London, and be my wife.'
-
-'No,' she said; 'that is impossible. Let us not speak of it.'
-
-Hubert did not answer; and, turning their faces homeward, they walked some
-way in silence. Suddenly Hubert said--
-
-'No; it is impossible. I cannot return. There is no use. I'm at the end of
-my tether. I cannot.'
-
-She looked at him in alarm.
-
-'Hubert,' she said, 'this is folly! I cannot return without you.'
-
-'You ruin my life; you refuse me the only happiness. I'm more wretched than
-I can tell you!'
-
-'And I! Do you think that I'm not wretched?' She raised her face to his;
-her eyes were full of tears. He caught her in his arms, and kissed her. The
-warm touch of her lips, the scent of her face and hair, banished all but
-desire of her.
-
-'You must come with me, Julia. I shall go mad if you don't. I can care for
-no one but you. All my life is in you now. You know I cannot love that
-girl, and we cannot continue in this wretched life. There is no sense in
-it; it is a voluntary, senseless martyrdom!'
-
-'Hubert, do not tempt me to be disloyal to my friend. It is cruel of you,
-for you know I love you. But no, nothing shall tempt me. How can I? We do
-not know what might happen. The shock might kill her. She might do away
-with herself.'
-
-'You must come with me,' said Hubert, now completely lost in his passion.
-'Nothing will happen. Girls do not do away with themselves; girls do not
-die of broken hearts. Nothing happens in these days. A few more tears will
-be shed, and she will soon become reconciled to what cannot be altered. A
-year or so after, we will marry her to a nice young man, and she will
-settle down a quiet mother of children.'
-
-'Perhaps you are right.'
-
-An empty fly, returning to the town, passed them. The fly-man raised his
-whip.
-
-'Take you to the railway station in ten minutes!'
-
-Hubert spoke quietly; nevertheless there was a strange nervousness in his
-eyes when he said--
-
-'Fate comes to help me; she offers us the means of escape. You will not
-refuse, Julia?'
-
-Her upraised face was full of doubt and pain, and she was perplexed by the
-fly-man's dull eyes, his starved horse, his ramshackle vehicle, the wet
-road, the leaden sky. It was one of those moments when the familiar appears
-strange and grotesque. Then, gathering all her resolution, she said--
-
-'No, no; it is impossible! Come back, come back.'
-
-He caught her arm: quietly and firmly he led her across the road. 'You must
-listen to me.... We are about to take a decisive step. Are you sure
-that----'
-
-'No, no, Hubert, I cannot; let us return home.'
-
-'I go back to Ashwood! If I did, I should commit suicide.'
-
-'Don't speak like that.... Where will you go?'
-
-'I shall travel.... I shall visit Italy and Greece.... I shall live
-abroad.'
-
-'You are not serious?'
-
-'Yes, I am, Julia. That cab may not take both, but it certainly will take
-one of us away from Ashwood, and for ever.'
-
-'Take you to Southwater, sir--take you to the station in ten minutes,' said
-the fly-man, pulling in his horse. A zig-zag fugitive thought passed: why
-did the fly-man speak of taking them to the station? How was it that he
-knew where they wanted to go? They stopped and wondered. The poor horse's
-bones stood out in strange projections, the round-shouldered little fly-man
-sat grinning on his box, showing three long yellow fangs. The vehicle, the
-horse, and the man, his arm raised in questioning gesture, appeared in
-strange silhouette upon the grey clouds, assuming portentous aspect in
-their tremulous and excited imaginations. 'Take you to Southwater in ten
-minutes!' The voice of the fly-man sounded hard, grating, and derisive in
-their ears.
-
-He had stopped in the middle of the road, and they walked slowly past,
-through a great puddle, which drenched their feet.
-
-'Get in, Julia. Shall I open the door?'
-
-'No, no; think of Emily. I cannot, Hubert,--I cannot; it would kill her.'
-
-The conversation paused, and in a long silence they wondered if the fly-man
-had heard. Then they walked several yards listening to the tramp of the
-hoofs, and then they heard the fly-man strike his horse with the whip. The
-animal shuffled into a sort of trot, and as the carriage passed them the
-fly-man again raised his arm and again repeated the same phrase, 'Drive you
-to the station in ten minutes!' The carriage was her temptation, and Julia
-hoped the man would linger no longer. For the promise she had given to
-Emily lay like a red-hot coal upon her heart; its fumes rose to her head,
-and there were times when she thought they would choke her, and she grew so
-sick with the pain of self-denial that she could have thrown herself down
-in the wet grass on the roadside, and laid her face on the cold earth for
-relief. Would nothing happen? What madness! Night was coming on, and still
-they followed the road to Southwater. Rain fell in heavy drops.
-
-'We shall get wet,' she murmured, as if she were answering the fly-man, who
-had said again, 'Drive you to the station in ten minutes!' She hated the
-man for his persistency.
-
-'Say you will come with me!' Hubert whispered; and all the while the rain
-came down heavier.
-
-'No, no, Hubert.... I cannot; I promised Emily that I never would. I am
-going back.'
-
-'Then we must say good-bye. I will not go back.'
-
-'You don't mean it. You don't really intend me to go back to Emily and tell
-her?... She will not believe me; she will think I have sent you away to
-gain my own end. Hubert, you mustn't leave me ... and in all this wet. See
-how it rains! I shall never be able to get home alone.'
-
-'I will drive you on as far as the lodge-gate; farther than the lodge I
-will not go. Nothing in the world shall tempt me to pass it.'
-
-At a sign from Hubert the little fly-man scrambled down from his box. He
-was a little old man, almost hunchbacked, with small mud-coloured eyes and
-a fringe of white beard about his sallow, discoloured face. He was dressed
-in a pale yellow jacket and waistcoat, and they both noticed that his
-crooked little legs were covered with a pair of pepper-and-salt trousers.
-They felt sure he must have overheard a large part of their conversation,
-for as he opened the carriage door he grinned, showing his three yellow
-fangs.... His appearance was not encouraging. Julia wished he were
-different, and then she looked at Hubert. She longed to throw herself into
-his arms and weep. But at that moment the heavens seemed to open, and the
-rain came down like a torrent, thick and fast, splashing all along the road
-in a million splashes.
-
-'Horrible weather, sir; shan't be long a-takin' you to Southwater. What
-part of the town be yer going to--the railway station?'
-
-Julia still hesitated. The rain beat on their faces, and when some chilling
-drops rolled down her neck she instinctively sought shelter in the
-carriage.
-
-'Drive me to the station as fast as you can. Catch the half-past five to
-London, and I'll give you five shillings.'
-
-The leather thong sounded on the starved animal's hide, the crazy vehicle
-rocked from side to side, and the wet country almost disappeared in the
-darkness. Hedges and fields swept past them in faintest outline, here and
-there a blurred mass, which they recognised as a farm building. His arm was
-about her, and she heard him murmur over and over again--
-
-'Dearest Julia, you are what I love best in the world.'
-
-The words thrilled her a little, but all the while she saw Emily's eyes and
-heard her voice.
-
-Hubert, however, was full of happiness--the sweet happiness of the quiet,
-docile creature that has at last obtained what it loves.
-
-
-
-
-XIX
-
-
-Emily awoke shivering; the fire had gone out, the room was in darkness, and
-the house seemed strange and lonely. She rang the bell, and asked the
-servant if he had seen Mr. Price. Mr. Price had gone out late in the
-afternoon, and had not come in. Where was Mrs. Bentley? Mrs. Bentley had
-gone out earlier in the afternoon, and had not come in.
-
-She suspected the truth at once. They had gone to London to be married. The
-servant lighted a candle, made up the fire, and asked if she would wait
-dinner. Emily made no answer, but sat still, her eyes fixed, looking into
-space. The man lingered at the door. At that moment her little dog bounded
-into the room, and, in a paroxysm of delight, jumped on his mistress's lap.
-She took him in her arms and kissed him, and this somewhat reassured the
-alarmed servant, who then thought it was no more than one of Miss Emily's
-queer ways. Dandy licked his mistress's face, and rubbed his rough head
-against her shoulder. He seemed more than usually affectionate that
-evening. Suddenly she caught him up in her arms, and kissed him
-passionately. 'Not even for your sake, dearest Dandy, can I bear with it
-any longer! We are all very selfish, and it is selfish of me to leave you,
-but I cannot help it.' Then a doubt crossed her mind, and she raised her
-head and listened to it. It seemed difficult to believe that he had told
-her a falsehood--cruel, wicked falsehood--he who had been so kind. And
-yet---- Ah! yes, she knew well enough that it was all true; something told
-her so. The lancinating pain of doubt passed away, and she remained
-thinking of the impossibility of bearing any longer with the life.
-
-An hour passed, and the servant came with the news that Mr. Price and Mrs.
-Bentley had gone to London; they had taken the half-past five train. 'Yes,'
-she said, 'I know they have.' Her voice was calm. There was a strange
-hollow ring in it, and the servant wondered. A few minutes after, dinner
-was announced; and to escape observation and comment she went into the
-dining-room, tasted the soup, and took a slice of mutton on her plate. She
-could not eat it. She gave it to Dandy. It was the last time she should
-feed him. How hungry he was! She hoped he would not care to eat it; he
-would not if he knew she was going to leave him.
-
-In the drawing-room he insisted on being nursed; and alone, amid the faded
-furniture, watched over by the old portraits, her pale face fixed and her
-pale hands clasping her beloved dog, she sat thinking, brooding over the
-unhappiness, the incurable unhappiness, of her little life. She was
-absorbed in self, and did not rail against Hubert, or even Julia. Their
-personalities had somehow dropped out of her mind, and merely represented
-forces against which she found herself unable any longer to contend. Nor
-was she surprised at what had happened. There had always been in her some
-prescience of her fate. She and unhappiness had always seemed so
-inseparable, that she had never found it difficult to believe that this
-last misfortune would befall her. She had thought it over, and had decided
-that it would be unendurable to live any longer, and had borne many a
-terrible insomnia so that she might collect sufficient chloral to take her
-out of her misery; and now, as she sat thinking, she remembered that she
-had never, never been happy. Oh! the miserable evenings she used to spend,
-when a child, between her father and mother, who could not agree--why, she
-never understood. But she used to have to listen to her mother addressing
-insulting speeches to her father in a calm, even voice that nothing could
-alter; and, though both were dead and years divided her from that time, the
-memory survived, and she could see it all again--that room, the very paper
-on the wall, and her father being gradually worked up into a frenzy.
-
-When she was left an orphan, Mr. Burnett had adopted her, and she
-remembered the joy of coming to Ashwood. She had thought to find happiness
-there; but there, as at home, fate had gone against her, and she was hardly
-eighteen when Mr. Burnett had asked her to marry him. She had loved that
-old man, but he had not loved her; for when she had refused to marry him he
-had broken all his promises and left her penniless, careless of what might
-become of her. Then she had given her whole heart to Julia, and Julia, too,
-had deceived her. And had she not loved Hubert?--no one would ever know how
-much; she did not know herself,--and had he not lied to her? Oh, it was
-very cruel to deceive a poor little girl in this heartless way! There was
-no heart in the world, that was it--and she was all heart; and her heart
-had been trampled on ever since she could remember. And when they came back
-they would revenge themselves upon her--insult her with their happiness;
-perhaps insist on sending her away.
-
-Dandy drowsed on her lap. The servant brought in the tea, and when he
-returned to the kitchen he said he had never seen any one look so
-ghost-like as Miss Emily. The clock ticked loudly in the silence of the old
-room, the hands moving slowly towards ten. She waited for the hour to
-strike; it was then that she usually went to bed. Her thoughts moved as in
-a nightmare; and paramount in this chaotic mass of sensation was an acute
-sense of the deception that had been practised on her; with the
-consciousness, now firm and unalterable, that it had become impossible for
-her to live. When the clock struck she got up from her chair, and the
-movement seemed to react on her brain; her thoughts unclouded, and she went
-up-stairs thinking clearly of her love of this old house. The old gentleman
-in the red coat, his hand on his sword, looked on her benignly; and the
-lady playing the spinet smiled as sweetly as was her wont. Emily held up
-the candle to the picture of the windmill. She had always loved that
-picture, and the sad thought came that she should never see it again.
-Dandy, who had galloped up-stairs, stood looking through the banisters,
-wagging his tail.
-
-The moment she got into her room she wrote the following note: 'I have
-taken an overdose of chloral. My life was too miserable to be borne any
-longer. I forgive those who have caused my unhappiness, and I hope they
-will forgive me any unhappiness I have caused them.' They were nothing to
-her now; they were beyond her hate, and the only pang she felt was parting
-with her beloved Dandy. There he stood looking at her, standing on the edge
-of the bed, waiting for her to cover him up and put him to sleep in his own
-corner. 'Yes, Dandy, in a moment, dear--have patience.' She looked round
-the little room, and, remembering all that she had suffered there, thought
-that the walls must be saturated with grief, like a sponge.
-
-It was a common thing at that time for her to stand before the glass and
-address such words as these to herself: 'My poor girl, how I pity you, how
-I pity you!' And now, looking at herself very sadly, she said, 'My poor
-girl, I shall never pity you any more!' Having hung up her dress, she
-fetched a chair and took various doses of chloral out of the hollow top of
-her wardrobe, where she had hidden things all her life--sweets, novels,
-fireworks. They more than half-filled the tumbler; and, looking at the
-sticky, white liquid, she thought with repugnance of drinking so much of
-it. But, wanting to make quite sure of death, she resolved to take it all,
-and she undressed quickly. She was very cold when she got into bed. Then a
-thought struck her, and she got out of bed to add a postscript to her
-letter. 'I have only one request to make. I hope Dandy will always be taken
-care of.' Surprised that she had not wrapped him up and told him he was to
-go to sleep, the dog stood on the edge of the bed, watching her so
-earnestly that she wondered if he knew what she was going to do. 'No, you
-don't know, dear--do you? If you did, you wouldn't let me do it; you'd bark
-the house down, I know you would, my own darling.' Clasping him to her
-breast, she smothered him with kisses, then put him away in his corner,
-covering him over for the night.
-
-She felt neither grief nor fear. Through much suffering, thought and
-sensation were, to a great extent, dead in her; and, in a sort of emotive
-numbness, she laid her candlestick in its usual place on the chair by her
-bedside; and, sitting up in bed, her night-dress carefully buttoned,
-holding the tumbler half-filled with chloral, she tried to take a
-dispassionate survey of her life. She thought of what she had endured, and
-what she would have to endure if she did not take it. Then she felt she
-must go, and without hesitation drank off the chloral. She placed the
-tumbler by the candlestick, and lay down, remembering vaguely that a long
-time ago she had decided that suicide was not wrong in itself. The last
-thing she remembered was the clock striking eleven.
-
-For half an hour she slept like stone. Then her eyes opened, and they told
-of sickness now in motion within her. And, strangely enough, through the
-overpowering nausea rising from her stomach to her brain, the thought that
-she was not going to die appeared perfectly clear, and with it a sense of
-disappointment; she would have to begin it all over again. It was with
-great difficulty that she struck a match and lighted a candle. It seemed
-impossible to get up. At last she managed to slip her legs out of bed, and
-found she could stand, and through the various assaults of retching she
-thought of the letter: it must be destroyed; and, leaning in the corner
-against the wall and the wardrobe, she tried to recover herself. A dull,
-deep sleep was pressing on her brain, and she thought she would never be
-able to cross the room to where the letter was. Dandy looked out of his
-rug; she caught sight of his bright eyes.
-
-On cold and shaky feet she attempted to make her way towards the letter;
-but the room heaved up at her, and, fearing she should fall, and knowing if
-she did that she would not be able to regain her feet, she clung to the
-toilette-table. She must destroy that letter: if it were found, they would
-watch her; and, however impossible her life might become, she would not be
-able to escape from it. This consideration gave her strength for a final
-effort. She tore the letter into very small pieces, and then, clinging to a
-chair, strove to grasp the rail of the bed; but the bed rolled worse than
-any ship. Making a supreme effort, she got in; and then, neither dreams nor
-waking thoughts, but oblivion complete. Hours and hours passed, and when
-she opened her eyes her maid stood over the bed, looking at her.
-
-'Oh, miss, you looked so tired and ill that I didn't wake you. You do seem
-poorly, miss. It is nearly two o'clock. Should you like to sleep a little
-longer, or shall I bring you up some breakfast?'
-
-'No, no, no, thank you. I couldn't touch anything. I'm feeling wretched;
-but I'll get up.'
-
-The maid tried to dissuade her; but Emily got out of bed, and allowed
-herself to be dressed. She was very weak--so weak that she could hardly
-stand up at the washstand; and the maid had to sponge her face and neck.
-But when she had drunk a cup of tea and eaten a little piece of toast, she
-said she felt better, and was able to walk into the drawing-room. She
-thought no more of death, nor of her troubles; thought drowned in her; and
-in a passive, torpid state she sat looking into the fire till dinner-time,
-hardly caring to bestow a casual caress on Dandy, who seemed conscious of
-his mistress's neglect, for, in his sly, coaxing way, he sometimes came and
-rubbed himself against her feet. She went into the dining-room, and the
-servant was glad to see that she finished her soup, and, though she hardly
-tasted it, she finished a wing of a chicken, and also the glass of wine
-which the man pressed upon her. Half an hour after, when he brought out the
-tea, he found her sitting on her habitual chair nursing her dog, and
-staring into the fire so drearily that her look frightened him, and he
-hesitated before he gave her the letter which had just come up from the
-town; but it was marked 'Immediate.'
-
-When he left the room she opened it. It was from Mrs. Bentley:--
-
-'Dearest Emily,--I know that Hubert told you that he was not going to marry
-me. He thought he was not, for I had refused to marry him; but a short time
-after we met in the park quite accidentally, and--well, fate took the
-matter out of our hands, and we are to be married to-morrow. Hubert insists
-on going to Italy, and I believe we shall remain there two months. We have
-made arrangements for your aunt to live with you until we come back; and
-when we do come back, I hope all the little unpleasantnesses which have
-marred our friendship for this last month or two will be forgotten. So far
-as I am concerned, nothing shall be left undone to make you happy. Your
-will shall be law at Ashwood so long as I am there. If you would like to
-join us in Italy, you have only to say the word. We shall be delighted to
-have you.'
-
-Emily could read no more. 'Join them in Italy!' She dashed the letter into
-the fire, and an intense hatred of them both pierced her heart and brain.
-It was the kiss of Judas. Oh, those hateful, lying words! To live here with
-her aunt until they came back, to wait here quietly until she returned in
-triumph with him--him who had been all the world to her. Oh no; that was
-not possible. Death, death--escape she must. But how? She had no more
-chloral. Suddenly she thought of the lake. 'Yes, yes; the lake, the lake!'
-And then a keen, swift, passionate longing for death, such as she had not
-felt at all the night before, came upon her. There was the knowledge too
-that by killing herself she would revenge herself on those who had killed
-her. She was just conscious that her suicide would have this effect, but
-hardly a trace of such intention appeared in the letter she wrote; it was
-as melancholy and as brief as the letter she had torn up, and ended, like
-it, with a request that Dandy should be well looked after. She had only
-just directed the envelope when she heard the servant coming to take away
-the tea-things. She concealed the letter; and when his steps died away in
-the corridor and the house-door closed, she knew she could slip out
-unobserved. Instinctively she thought of her hat and jacket, and, without a
-shudder, remembered she would not need them. She sped down the pathway
-through the shadow of the firs.
-
-It was one of those warm nights of winter when a sulphur-coloured sky hangs
-like a blanket behind the wet, dishevelled woods; and, though there was
-neither moon nor star, the night was strangely clear, and the shadow of the
-bridge was distinct in the water. When she approached the brink the swans
-moved slowly away. They reminded her of the cold; but the black obsession
-of death was upon her; and, hastening her steps, she threw herself forward.
-She fell into shallow water and regained her feet, and for a moment it
-seemed uncertain if she would wade to the bank or fling herself into a
-deeper place. Suddenly she sank, the water rising to her shoulders. She was
-lifted off her feet. A faint struggle, a faint cry, and then
-nothing--nothing but the whiteness of the swans moving through the sultry
-night slowly towards the island.
-
-
-
-
-XX
-
-
-Its rich, inanimate air proclaimed the room to be an expensive bedroom in a
-first-class London hotel. Interest in the newly-married couple, who were to
-occupy the room, prompted the servants to see that nothing was forgotten;
-and as they lingered steps were heard in the passage, and Hubert and Julia
-entered. The maid-servants stood aside to let them pass, and one inquired
-if madame wanted anything, so that her eyes might be gratified with a last
-inquisition of the happy pair.
-
-'How wonderful! oh, how wonderful! I don't think I ever saw any one act
-before like that--did you?'
-
-'She certainly had three or four moments that could not be surpassed. Her
-entrance in the sleep-walking scene--what vague horror! what pale
-presentiment! how she filled the stage! nothing seemed to exist but she.'
-
-'And Ford; what did you think of Ford's Macbeth?'
-
-'Very good. Everything he does is good. Talent; but the other has genius.'
-
-'I shall never forget this evening. What an awful tragedy!'
-
-'Perhaps I should have taken you to see something more cheerful; but I
-wanted to see Miss Massey play Lady Macbeth. But let us talk of something
-else. Splendid fire--is it not?'
-
-Hubert threw off his overcoat, the movement attracted Julia's attention,
-and it startled her to see how old he seemed to have grown. She noticed as
-she had not noticed before the grey in his beard and the pathetic weary
-look that haunted his eyes. And she understood in that instant that the
-look his face wore was the look of those who have failed in their vocation.
-
-And at that very moment he was wondering if he really loved her, if his
-marriage were a mistake. The passion he had felt when walking with her on
-the wet country road he felt no longer, only an undefinable sadness and a
-weariness which he could not understand. He looked at his wife, and fearing
-that she divined his thoughts, he kissed her. She returned his kiss coldly
-and he wondered if she loved him. He thought that it was improbable that
-she did. Why should she love him? He had never loved any one. He had never
-inspired love in any one, except perhaps Emily.
-
-'I wonder if you really wished to be married,' she said.
-
-'I always wished to be married,' he replied. 'I hated the Bohemianism I was
-forced to live in. I longed for a home, for a wife.'
-
-'You were very poor once?'
-
-'Yes: I've lived on tenpence and a shilling a day. I've worked in the docks
-as a labourer. I went down there hoping to get a clerkship on board one of
-the Transatlantic steamers. I had had enough of England, and thought of
-seeking fortune elsewhere.'
-
-'I can hardly believe you worked as a labourer in the docks.'
-
-'Yes; I did. I saw some men going to work, and I joined them. I don't think
-I thought much about it at the time. A very little misery rubs all the
-psychology out of us, and we return more easily than one thinks to the
-animal.'
-
-'And then?'
-
-'At the end of a week the work began to tell upon me, and I drifted back in
-search of my manuscript.'
-
-'But you must have been in a dreadful condition; your clothes----'
-
-'Ah! thereby hangs a tale. An actress lived in one of the houses I had been
-lodging in.'
-
-'Oh, tell me about her! This is getting very interesting.'
-
-Then passing his arm round his wife's neck, and with her sweet blonde face
-looking upon him, and the insinuating warmth of the fire about them, he
-told her the story of his failure.
-
-'But,' she said, her voice trembling, 'you would not have committed
-suicide?'
-
-'No man knows beforehand whether he will commit suicide. I can only say
-that every other issue was closed.'
-
-At the end of a long silence Julia said, 'I wish you hadn't spoken about
-suicide. I cannot but think of Emily. If she were to make away with
-herself! The very possibility turns my heart to ice. What should I do--what
-should we do? I ought never to have given way; we were both abominably
-selfish. I can see that poor girl sitting alone in that house grieving her
-heart out.'
-
-'You think that we ought never to have given way!'
-
-'I suppose we ought not. I tried very hard, you know I did.... But do you
-regret?' she said, looking at him suddenly.
-
-'No; I don't regret, but I wish it had happened otherwise.'
-
-'You don't fear anything. Nothing will happen. What can happen?'
-
-'The most terrible things often happen--have happened.'
-
-'Emily may have been fond of me--I think she was; but it was no more than
-the hysterical caprice of a young girl. Besides, people do not die for
-love; and I assure you it will be all right. This is not a time for gloomy
-thoughts.'
-
-'I'll try not to think of her. Well, what were we talking about? I know:
-about the actress who lived in 17 Fitzroy Street. Tell me about her.'
-
-'She was a real good girl. If she hadn't lent me that five shillings, I
-don't know where I should be now.'
-
-'Were you very fond of her?'
-
-'No; there never was anything of that sort between us. We were merely
-friends.'
-
-'And what has become of this actress?'
-
-'You saw her to-night?'
-
-'Was she acting in the piece we saw to-night?'
-
-'It was she who played Lady Macbeth.'
-
-'You are joking.'
-
-'No, I'm not. I always knew she had genius, and they have found it out; but
-I must say they have taken their time about it.'
-
-'How wonderful! she has succeeded!'
-
-'Yes, _she_ has succeeded!'
-
-'And she is really the girl you intended to play Lady Hayward?'
-
-'Yes; and I hope she will play the part one of these days.'
-
-'Of course, she is just the woman for it. What a splendid success she has
-had! All London is talking about her.'
-
-'And I remember when Ford refused to cast her for the adventuress in
-_Divorce_. If he had, there is no doubt she would have carried the piece
-through. Life is but a bundle of chances; she has succeeded, whatever that
-may mean.'
-
-'But you will let her have the part of Lady Hayward?'
-
-'Yes, of course--that is to say, if----'
-
-'Why "if"?'
-
-'My thoughts are with you, dear; literature seems to have passed out of
-sight.'
-
-'But you must not sacrifice your talent in worship of me. I shall not allow
-you. For my sake, if not for hers, you must finish that play. I want you to
-be famous. I should be for ever miserable if my love proved a upas-tree.'
-
-'A upas-tree! It will be you who will help me; it will be your presence
-that will help me to write my play. I was always vaguely conscious that you
-were a necessary element in my life; but I did not wake up to any knowledge
-of it until that day--do you remember?--when you came into my study to ask
-me what fish I'd like for dinner, and I begged of you to allow me to read
-to you that second act. It is that second act that stops me.'
-
-'I thought you had written the second act to your satisfaction. You said
-that after the talk we had that afternoon you wrote for three hours without
-stopping, and that you had never done better work.'
-
-'Yes, I wrote a great deal; but on reading it over I found that--I don't
-mean to say that none of it will stand; some still seems to me to be all
-right, but a great deal will require alteration.'
-
-The conversation fell. At the end of a long silence Hubert said--
-
-'What are you thinking of, dearest?'
-
-'I was thinking that supposing you were mistaken--if I failed to help you
-in your work.'
-
-'And I never succeeded in writing my play?'
-
-'No; I don't mean that. Of course you will write your play; all you have to
-do is to be less critical.'
-
-'Yes, I know--I have heard that before; but, unfortunately, we cannot
-change ourselves. I'll either carry my play through completely, realise my
-ideal, or----'
-
-'Remain for ever unsatisfied?'
-
-'Whether I write it or no, I shall be happy in your love.'
-
-'Yes, yes; let us be happy.'
-
-They looked at each other. He did not speak, but his thought said--
-
-'There is no happiness on earth for him who has not accomplished his task.'
-
-'Shall we be happy? I wonder. We have both suffered,' she said, 'we are
-both tired of suffering, and it is only right that we should be happy.'
-
-'Yes, we shall be happy, I will be happy. It shall be my pleasure to attend
-to you, to give you all your desire. But you said just now that you had
-suffered. I have told you my past. Tell me yours. I know nothing except
-that you were unhappily married.'
-
-'There is little else to know; a woman's life is not adventurous, like a
-man's. I have not known the excitement of "first nights," nor the striving
-and the craving for an artistic ideal. My life has been essentially a
-woman's life,--suppression of self and monotonous duty, varied by
-heart-breaking misfortune. I married when I was very young; before I had
-even begun to think about life I found---- But why distress these hours
-with painful memories?'
-
-'It is pleasant to look back on the troubles we have passed through.'
-
-'Well, I learnt in one year the meaning of three terrible words--poverty,
-neglect, and cruelty. In the second year of my marriage my husband died of
-drink, and I was left a widow at twenty, entirely penniless. I went to live
-with my sister, and she was so poor that I had to support myself by giving
-music-lessons. You think you know the meaning of poverty: you may; but you
-do not know what a young woman who wants to earn her bread honestly has to
-put up with, trudging through wet and cold, mile after mile, to give a
-lesson, paid for at the rate of one-and-sixpence or two shillings an hour.'
-
-Julia took her eyes from her husband's face, and looked dreamily into the
-fire. Then, raising her face from the flame, she looked around with the air
-of one seeking for some topic of conversation. At that moment she caught
-sight of the corner of a letter lying on the mantelpiece. Reaching forth
-her hand, she took it. It was addressed to her husband.
-
-'Here is a letter for you, Hubert.... Why, it comes from Ashwood. Yes, and
-it is in the hand-writing of one of the servants. Oh, it is Black's
-writing! It may be about Emily. Something may have happened to her. Open it
-quickly.'
-
-'That is not probable. Nothing can have happened to her.'
-
-'Look and see. Be quick!'
-
-Hubert opened the letter, and he had not read three lines when Julia's face
-caught expression from his, which had become overcast.
-
-'It is bad news, I know. Something has happened. What is it? Don't keep me
-waiting. The suspense is worse than the truth.'
-
-'It is very awful, Julia. Don't give way.'
-
-'Tell me what it is. Is she dead?
-
-'Yes; she is dead.' Julia got up from her husband's knees and stood by the
-mantelpiece, leaning upon it. 'It is more than mere death.'
-
-'What do you mean? She killed herself--is that it?'
-
-'Yes; she drowned herself the night before last in the lake.'
-
-'Oh, it is too horrible! Then we have murdered her. Our unpardonable
-selfishness! I cannot bear it!' Her eyes closed and her lips trembled.
-Hubert caught her in his arms, laid her on the chair, and, fetching some
-water in a tumbler, sprinkled her face; then he held it to her lips; she
-drank a little, and revived. 'I'm not going to faint. Tell me--tell me when
-the unfortunate child----'
-
-'They don't know exactly. She was in the drawing-room at tea-time, and the
-drawing-room was empty when Black went round three-quarters of an hour
-after to lock up. He thought she had gone to her room. It was the gardener
-who brought in the news in the morning about nine.'
-
-'Oh, good God!'
-
-'Black says he noticed that she looked very depressed the day before, but
-he thought she was looking better when he brought in the tea.'
-
-'It was then she got my letter. Does Black say anything about giving her a
-letter?'
-
-'Yes, that is to say----'
-
-'I knew it! I knew it!' said Julia; and her eyes were wild with grief, and
-she rocked herself to and fro. 'It was that letter that drove her to it. It
-was most ill-advised. I told you so. You should have written. She would
-have borne the news better had it come from you. My instinct told me so,
-but I let myself be persuaded. I told you how it would happen. I told you.
-You can't say I didn't. Oh! why did you persuade me--why--why--why?'
-
-'Julia dear, we are not responsible. We were in nowise bound to sacrifice
-our happiness to her----'
-
-'Don't say a word! I say we were bound. Life can never be the same to me
-again.'
-
-Hubert did not answer. Nothing he could say would be of the slightest
-avail, and he feared to say anything that might draw from her expressions
-which she would afterwards regret. He had never seen her moved like this,
-nor did he believe her capable of such agitation, and the contrast of her
-present with her usual demeanour made it the more impressive.
-
-'Oh,' she said, leaning forward and looking at him fixedly, 'take this
-nightmare off my brain, or I shall go mad! It isn't true; it cannot be
-true. But--oh! yes, it's true enough.'
-
-'Like you, Julia, I am overwhelmed; but we can do nothing.'
-
-'Do nothing!' she cried; 'do nothing! We can do nothing but pray for
-her--we who sacrificed her.' And she slipped on her knees and burst into a
-passionate fit of weeping.
-
-'The best thing that could have happened,' thought Hubert; and his thought
-said, clearly and precisely, 'Yes; it is awful, shocking, cruel beyond
-measure!'
-
-The fire was sinking, and he built it up quietly, ashamed of this proof of
-his regard for physical comfort, and hoping it would pass unnoticed. His
-pain expressed itself less vehemently than Julia's; but for all that his
-mind ached. He remembered how he had taken everything from her--fortune,
-happiness, and now life itself. It was an appalling tragedy--one of those
-senseless cruelties which we find nature constantly inventing. A thought
-revealed an unexpected analogy between him and his victim. In both lives
-there had been a supreme desire, and both had failed. 'Hers was the better
-part,' he said bitterly. 'Those whose souls are burdened with desire that
-may not be gratified had better fling the load aside. They are fools who
-carry it on to the end.... If it were not for Julia----'
-
-Then he sought to determine what were his exact feelings. He knew he was
-infinitely sorry for poor Emily; but he could not stir himself into a
-paroxysm of grief, and, ashamed of his inability to express his feelings,
-he looked at Julia, who still wept.
-
-'No doubt,' he thought, 'women have keener feelings than we have.'
-
-At that moment Julia got up from her knees. She had brushed away her tears.
-Her face was shaken with grief.
-
-'My heart is breaking,' she said. 'This is too cruel--too cruel! And on my
-wedding night.'
-
-Their eyes met; and, divining each other's thought, each felt ashamed, and
-Julia said--
-
-'Oh, what am I saying? This dreadful selfishness, from which we cannot
-escape, that is with us even in such a moment as this! That poor child gone
-to her death, and yet amid it all we must think of ourselves.'
-
-'My dear Julia, we cannot escape from our human nature; but, for all that,
-our grief is sincere. We can do nothing. Do not grieve like that.'
-
-'And why not? She was my best friend. How have I repaid her? Alas! as woman
-always repays woman for kindness done. The old story. I cannot forgive
-myself. No, no! do not kiss me! I cannot bear it. Leave me. I can see
-nothing but Emily's reproachful face.' She covered her face in her hands
-and sobbed again.
-
-The same scenes repeated themselves over and over again. The same fits of
-passionate grief; the same moment of calm, when words impregnated with self
-dropped from their lips. The same nervous sense that something of the dead
-girl stood between them. And still they sat by the fire, weary with sorrow,
-recrimination, long regret, and pain. They could grieve no more; and before
-dawn sleep pressed upon their eyelids, and at the end of a long silence he
-dozed--a pale, transparent sleep, through which the realities of life
-appeared almost as plainly as before. Suddenly he awoke, and he shivered in
-the chill room. The fire was sinking; dawn divided the window-curtains. He
-looked at his wife. She seemed to him very beautiful as she slept, her face
-turned a little on one side, and again he asked himself if he loved her.
-Then, going to the window, he drew the curtains softly, so as not to awaken
-her; and as he stood watching a thin discoloured day breaking over the
-roofs, it again seemed to him that Emily's suicide was the better part.
-'Those who do not perform their task in life are never happy.' The words
-drilled themselves into his brain with relentless insistency. He felt a
-terrible emptiness within him which he could not fill. He looked at his
-wife and quailed a little at the thought that had suddenly come upon him.
-She was something like himself--that was why he had married her. We are
-attracted by what is like ourselves. Emily's passion might have stirred
-him. Now he would have to settle down to live with Julia, and their similar
-natures would grow more and more like one another. Then, turning on his
-thoughts, he dismissed them. They were the morbid feverish fancies of an
-exceptional, of a terrible night. He opened the window quietly so as not to
-awaken his wife. And in the melancholy greyness of the dawn he looked down
-into the street and wondered what the end would be.
-
-He did not think that he would live long. Disappointed men--those who have
-failed in their ambition--do not live to make old bones. There were men
-like him in every profession--the arts are crowded with them. He had met
-barristers and soldiers and clergy-men, just like himself. One hears of
-their deaths--failure of the heart's action, paralysis of the brain, a
-hundred other medical causes--but the real cause is, lack of appreciation.
-
-He would hang on for another few years, no doubt; during that time he must
-try to make his wife happy. His duty was now to be a good husband, at all
-events, there was that.
-
-His wife lay asleep in the arm-chair, and fearing she might catch cold, he
-came into the room closing the window very gently behind him.
-
-THE END
-
-Printed by T. and A. Constable, printers to Her Majesty at the Edinburgh
-University Press.
-
-*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 11303 ***
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-
-The Project Gutenberg EBook of Vain Fortune, by George Moore
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
-almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
-re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
-with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
-
-
-Title: Vain Fortune
-
-Author: George Moore
-
-Release Date: June 7, 2004 [EBook #11303]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK VAIN FORTUNE ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by Jon Ingram, Branko Collin and PG Distributed Proofreaders
-
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-</pre>
-
-
-<a name="001.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<div class="image"><a href="images/image01.jpeg"><img src="images/image01-thumb.jpeg"
-alt="[drawing]" align="left"></a> "She slipped on her knees, and
-burst into a passionate fit of weeping."</div>
-
-<br>
-
-<a name="002.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h1><span class="caps">Vain Fortune</span></h1>
-
-<h2><span class="caps">A Novel</span></h2>
-
-<h3><span class="caps">By</span></h3>
-
-<h3><span class="caps">George Moore</span></h3>
-
-<h3><i><span class="caps">With Five Illustrations</span> By</i> <i><span
-class="caps">Maurice Greiffenhagen</span></i></h3> <span class="caps">New
-Edition</span> <span class="caps">Completely Revised</span> <span
-class="caps">London: Walter Scott, Ltd.</span> <span
-class="caps">Paternoster Square</span> 1895
-
-<a name="003.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Edinburgh: T. and A. <span class="small-caps">Constable</span>, Printers
-to Her Majesty</p>
-
-<a id="pv"></a>
-
-<h2><span class="caps">Prefatory Note</span></h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">I hope</span> it will not seem presumptuous to
-ask my critics to treat this new edition of <i>Vain Fortune</i> as a new
-book: for it is a new book. The first edition was kindly noticed, but it
-attracted little attention, and very rightly, for the story as told therein
-was thin and insipid; and when Messrs. Scribner proposed to print the book
-in America, I stipulated that I should be allowed to rewrite it. They
-consented, and I began the story with Emily Watson, making her the
-principal character instead of Hubert Price. Some months after I received a
-letter from Madam Couperus, offering to translate the English edition into
-Dutch. I sent her the American edition, and asked her which she would
-prefer to translate from. Madam Couperus replied that many things in the
-English edition, which she would like to retain, had been omitted from the
-American edition, that the hundred or more pages <a id="pvi"></a> which I
-had written for the American edition seemed to her equally worthy of
-retention.</p>
-
-<p>She pointed out that, without the alteration of a sentence, the two
-versions could be combined. The idea had not occurred to me; I saw,
-however, that what she proposed was not only feasible but advantageous. I
-wrote, therefore, giving her the required permission, and thanking her for
-a suggestion which I should avail myself of when the time came for a new
-English edition.</p>
-
-<p>The union of the texts was no doubt accomplished by Madam Couperus,
-without the alteration of a sentence; but no such accomplished editing is
-possible to me; I am a victim to the disease of rewriting, and the
-inclusion of the hundred or more pages of new matter written for the
-American edition led me into a third revision of the story. But no more
-than in the second has the skeleton, or the attitude of the skeleton been
-altered in this third version, only flesh and muscle have been added, and,
-I think, a little life. <i>Vain Fortune</i>, even in its present form, is
-probably <a id="pvii"></a> not my best book, but it certainly is far from
-being my worst. But my opinion regarding my own work is of no value; I do
-not write this Prefatory Note to express it, but to ask my critics and my
-readers to forget the original <i>Vain Fortune</i>, and to read this new
-book as if it were issued under another title.</p>
-
-<p>G.M.</p>
-
-<a name="007.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<a name="008.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<hr>
-
-<h2>I</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">The</span> lamp had not been wiped, and the
-room smelt slightly of paraffin. The old window-curtains, whose harsh green
-age had not softened, were drawn. The mahogany sideboard, the threadbare
-carpet, the small horsehair sofa, the gilt mirror, standing on a white
-marble chimney-piece, said clearly, 'Furnished apartments in a house built
-about a hundred years ago.' There were piles of newspapers, there were
-books on the mahogany sideboard and on the horsehair sofa, and on the table
-there were various manuscripts,&mdash;<i>The Gipsy</i>, Act I.; <i>The
-Gipsy</i>, Act III., Scenes iii. and iv.</p>
-
-<p>A sheet of foolscap paper, and upon it a long slender hand. The hand
-traced a few lines of fine, beautiful caligraphy, then it paused,
-correcting with extreme care <a name="009.png" class="pb"></a> what was
-already written, and in a hesitating, minute way, telling of a brain that
-delighted in the correction rather than in the creation of form.</p>
-
-<p>The shirt-cuff was frayed and dirty. The coat was thin and shiny. A
-half-length figure of a man drew out of the massed shadows between the
-window and sideboard. The red beard caught the light, and the wavy brown
-hair brightened. Then a look of weariness, of distress, passed over the
-face, and the man laid down the pen, and, taking some tobacco from a paper,
-rolled a cigarette. Rising, and leaning forward, he lighted it over the
-lamp. He was a man of about thirty&mdash;six feet, broad-shouldered, well-built,
-healthy, almost handsome.</p>
-
-<p>The time he spent in dreaming his play amounted to six times, if not ten
-times, as much as he devoted to trying to write it; and he now lit
-cigarette after cigarette, abandoning himself to every meditation,&mdash;the
-unpleasantness of life in lodgings, the charm of foreign travel, the beauty
-of the south, what he would do if his play succeeded. He plunged into
-calculation of the time it would take him to finish it if he were to sit at
-home all day, working from seven to ten hours every day. If he could but
-make up his mind concerning the beginning and the middle of the third act,
-and <a name="010.png" class="pb"></a> about the end, too,&mdash;the
-solution,&mdash;he felt sure that, with steady work, the play could be completed
-in a fortnight. In such reverie and such consideration he lay immersed,
-oblivious of the present moment, and did not stir from his chair until the
-postman shook the frail walls with a violent double knock. He hoped for a
-letter, for a newspaper&mdash;either would prove a welcome distraction. The
-servant's footsteps on the stairs told him the post had brought him
-something. His heart sank at the thought that it was probably only a bill,
-and he glanced at all the bills lying one above another on the table.</p>
-
-<p>It was not a bill, nor yet an advertisement, but a copy of a weekly
-review. He tore it open. An article about himself!</p>
-
-<p>After referring to the deplorable condition of the modern stage, the
-writer pointed out how dramatic writing has of late years come to be
-practised entirely by men who have failed in all other branches of
-literature. Then he drew attention to the fact that signs of weariness and
-dissatisfaction with the old stale stories, the familiar tricks in bringing
-about 'striking situations,' were noticeable, not only in the newspaper
-criticisms of new plays, but also among the better portion of the audience.
-He admitted, however, that hitherto the attempts made by younger writers in
-the <a name="011.png" class="pb"></a> direction of new subject-matter and
-new treatment had met with little success. But this, he held, was not a
-reason for discouragement. Did those who believed in the old formulas
-imagine that the new formula would be discovered straight away, without
-failures preliminary? Besides, these attempts were not utterly despicable;
-at least one play written on the new lines had met with some measure of
-success, and that play was Mr. Hubert Price's <i>Divorce</i>.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, the fellow is right. The public is ready for a good play: it
-wasn't when <i>Divorce</i> was given. I must finish <i>The Gipsy</i>. There
-are good things in it; that I know. But I wish I could get that third act
-right. The public will accept a masterpiece, but it will not accept an
-attempt to write a masterpiece. But this time there'll be no falling off in
-the last acts. The scene between the gipsy lover and the young lord will
-fetch 'em.' Taking up the review, Hubert glanced over the article a second
-time. 'How anxious the fellows are for me to achieve a success! How they
-believe in me! They desire it more than I do. They believe in me more than
-I do in myself. They want to applaud me. They are hungry for the
-masterpiece.'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment his eye was caught by some letters written on blue paper.
-His face resumed a wearied <a name="012.png" class="pb"></a> and hunted
-expression. 'There's no doubt about it, money I must get somehow. I am
-running it altogether too fine. There isn't twenty pounds between me and
-the deep sea.'</p>
-
-<div>&nbsp;</div> <!-- pause -->
-
-<p>He was the son of the Rev. James Price, a Shropshire clergyman. The
-family was of Welsh extraction, but in Hubert none of the physical
-characteristics of the Celt appeared. He might have been selected as a
-typical Anglo-Saxon. The face was long and pale, and he wore a short
-reddish beard; the eyes were light blue, verging on grey, and they seemed
-to speak a quiet, steadfast soul. Hubert had always been his mother's
-favourite, and the scorn of his elder brothers, two rough boys, addicted in
-early youth to robbing orchards, and later on to gambling and drinking. The
-elder, after having broken his father's heart with debts and disgraceful
-living, had gone out to the Cape. News of his death came to the Rectory
-soon after; but James's death did not turn Henry from his evil courses, and
-one day his father and mother had to go to London on his account, and they
-brought him back a hopeless invalid. Hubert was twelve years of age when he
-followed his brother to the grave.</p>
-
-<a name="013.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>It was at his brother's funeral that Hubert met for the first time his
-uncle, Mr. Burnett. Mr. Burnett had spent the greater part of his life in
-New Zealand, where he had made a large fortune by sheep-farming and
-investments in land. He had seemed to be greatly taken with his nephew, and
-for many years it was understood that he would leave him the greater part,
-if not the whole, of his fortune. But Mr. Burnett had come under the
-influence of some poor relations, some distant cousins, the Watsons, and
-had eventually decided to adopt their daughter Emily and leave her his
-fortune. He did not dare intimate his change of mind to his sister; but the
-news having reached Mrs. Price in various rumours, she wrote to her brother
-asking him to confirm or deny these rumours; and when he admitted their
-truth, Mrs. Price never spoke to him again. She was a determined woman, and
-the remembrance of the wrong done to her son never left her.</p>
-
-<p>While the other children had been a torment and disgrace, Hubert had
-been to his parents a consolation and a blessing. They had feared that he
-too might turn to betting and drink, but he had never shown sign of low
-tastes. He played no games, nor did he care for terriers or horses; but for
-books and drawing, <a name="014.png" class="pb"></a> and long country
-walks. Immediately on hearing of his disinheritance he had spoken at once
-of entering a profession; and for many months this was the subject of
-consideration in the Rectory. Hubert joined in these discussions willingly,
-but he could not bring himself to accept the army or the bar. It was indeed
-only necessary to look at him to see that neither soldier's tunic nor
-lawyer's wig was intended for him; and it was nearly as clear that those
-earnest eyes, so intelligent and yet so undetermined in their gaze, were
-not those of a doctor.</p>
-
-<p>But if his eyes failed to predict his future, his hands told the story
-of his life distinctly enough&mdash;those long, white, languid hands, what could
-they mean but art? And very soon Hubert began to draw, evincing some
-natural aptitude. Then an artist came into the neighbourhood, the two
-became friends, and went together on a long sketching tour. Life in the
-open air, the shade of the hedge, the glare of the highway, the meditation
-of the field, the languor of the river-side, the contemplation of wooded
-horizons, was what Hubert's pastoral nature was most fitted to enjoy; and,
-for the sake of the life it afforded him, he pursued the calling of a
-landscape painter long after he had begun to feel his desire turning in
-another direction. When <a name="015.png" class="pb"></a> the landscape on
-the canvas seemed hopelessly inadequate, he laid aside the brush for the
-pencil, and strove to interpret the summer fields in verse. From verse he
-drifted into the article and the short story, and from the story into the
-play. And it was in this last form that he felt himself strongest, and
-various were the dramas and comedies that he dreamed from year's end to
-year's end.</p>
-
-<p>While he was in the midst of his period of verse-writing his mother
-died, and in the following year, just as he was working at his stories, he
-received a telegram calling him to attend his father's death-bed. When the
-old man was laid in the shadow of the weather-beaten village church, Hubert
-gathered all his belongings and bade farewell for ever to the Shropshire
-rectory.</p>
-
-<p>In London Hubert made few friends. There were some two or three men with
-whom he was frequently seen&mdash;quiet folk like himself, whose enjoyment
-consisted in smoking a tranquil pipe in the evening, or going for long
-walks in the country. He was one of those men whose indefiniteness provokes
-curiosity, and his friends noticed and wondered why it was that he was so
-frequently the theme of their conversation. His simple, unaffected manners
-were full of suggestion, <a name="016.png" class="pb"></a> and in his
-writings there was always an indefinable rainbow-like promise of ultimate
-achievement. So, long before he had succeeded in writing a play, detached
-scenes and occasional verses led his friends into gradual belief that he
-was one from whom big things might be expected. And when the one-act play
-which they had all so heartily approved of was produced, and every
-newspaper praised it for its literary quality, the friends took pride in
-this public vindication of their opinion. After the production of his play
-people came to see the new author, and every Saturday evening some fifteen
-or twenty men used to assemble in Hubert's lodgings to drink whisky, smoke
-cigars, and talk drama. Encouraged by his success, Hubert wrote
-<i>Divorce</i>. He worked unceasingly upon it for more than a year, and
-when he had written the final scene, he was breaking into his last hundred
-pounds. The play was refused twice, and then accepted by a theatrical
-speculator, to whom it seemed to afford opportunity for the exhibition of
-the talents of a lady he was interested in.</p>
-
-<p>The success of the play was brief. But before it was withdrawn, Hubert
-had sold the American rights for a handsome sum, and within the next two
-years he had completed a second play, which he <a name="017.png"
-class="pb"></a> called <i>An Ebbing Tide</i>. Some of the critics argued
-that it contained scenes as fine as any in <i>Divorce</i>, but it was
-admitted on all sides that the interest withered in the later acts. But the
-failure of the play did not shake the established belief in Hubert's
-genius; it merely concentrated the admiration of those interested in the
-new art upon <i>Divorce</i>, the partial failure of which was now
-attributed to the acting. If it had only been played at the Haymarket or
-the Lyceum, it could not have failed.</p>
-
-<p>The next three years Hubert wasted in various aestheticisms. He
-explained the difference between the romantic and realistic methods in the
-reviews; he played with a poetic drama to be called <i>The King of the
-Beggars</i>, and it was not until the close of the third year that he
-settled down to definite work. Then all his energies were concentrated on a
-new play&mdash;<i>The Gipsy</i>. A young woman of Bohemian origin is suddenly
-taken with the nostalgia of the tent, and leaves her husband and her home
-to wander with those of her race. He had read portions of this play to his
-friends, who at last succeeded in driving Montague Ford, the popular
-actor-manager, to Hubert's door; and after hearing some few scenes he had
-offered a couple of hundred pounds in advance of fees <a name="018.png"
-class="pb"></a> for the completed manuscript. 'But when can I have the
-manuscript?' said Ford, as he was about to leave. 'As soon as I can finish
-it,' Hubert replied, looking at him wistfully out of pale blue-grey eyes.
-'I could finish it in a month, if I could count on not being worried by
-duns or disturbed by friends during that time.'</p>
-
-<p>Ford looked at Hubert questioningly; then he said 'I have always noticed
-that when a fellow wants to finish a play, the only way to do it is to go
-away to the country and leave no address.'</p>
-
-<p>But the country was always so full of pleasure for him, that he doubted
-his power to remain indoors with the temptation of fields and rivers before
-his eyes, and he thought that to escape from dunning creditors it would be
-sufficient to change his address. So he left Norfolk Street for the more
-remote quarter of Fitzroy Street, where he took a couple of rooms on the
-second floor. One of his fellow-lodgers, he soon found, was Rose Massey, an
-actress engaged for the performance of small parts at the Queen's Theatre.
-The first time he spoke to her was on the doorstep. She had forgotten her
-latch-key, and he said, 'Will you allow me to let you in?' She stepped
-aside, but did not answer him. Hubert thought her rude, but her strange
-eyes <a name="019.png" class="pb"></a> and absent-minded manner had piqued
-his curiosity, and, having nothing to do that night, he went to the theatre
-to see her act. She was playing a very small part, and one that was
-evidently unsuited to her&mdash;a part that was in contradiction to her nature;
-but there was something behind the outer envelope which led him to believe
-she had real talent, and would make a name for herself when she was given a
-part that would allow her to reveal what was in her.</p>
-
-<p>In the meantime, Rose had been told that the gentleman she had snubbed
-in the passage was Mr. Hubert Price, the author of <i>Divorce</i>.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, it was very silly of me,' she said to Annie. 'If I had only
-known!'</p>
-
-<p>'Lor', he don't mind; he'll be glad enough to speak to you when you
-meets him again.'</p>
-
-<p>And when they met again on the stairs, Rose nodded familiarly, and
-Hubert said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I went to the Queen's the other night.'</p>
-
-<p>'Did you like the piece?'</p>
-
-<p>'I did not care about the piece; but when you get a wild, passionate
-part to play, you'll make a hit. The sentimental parts they give you don't
-suit you.'</p>
-
-<p>A sudden light came into the languid face. 'Yes, I shall do something if
-I can get a part like that.'</p>
-
-<a name="020.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Hubert told her that he was writing a play containing just such a
-part.</p>
-
-<p>Her eyes brightened again. 'Will you read me the play?' she said, fixing
-her dark, dreamy eyes on him.</p>
-
-<p>'I shall be very glad.... Do you think it won't bore you?' And his
-wistful grey eyes were full of interrogation.</p>
-
-<p>'No, I'm sure it won't.'</p>
-
-<p>And a few days after she sent Annie with a note, reminding him of his
-promise to read her what he had written. As she had only a bedroom, the
-reading had to take place in his sitting-room. He read her the first and
-second acts. She was all enthusiasm, and begged hard to be allowed to study
-the part&mdash;just to see what she could do with it&mdash;just to let him see that
-he was not mistaken in her. Her interest in his work captivated him, and he
-couldn't refuse to lend her the manuscript.</p>
-
-<a name="021.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>II</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Rose</span> often came to see Hubert in his
-rooms. Her manner was disappointing, and he thought he must be mistaken in
-his first judgment of her talents. But one afternoon she gave him a
-recitation of the sleep-walking scene in <i>Macbeth</i>. It was strange to
-see this little dark-complexioned, dark-eyed girl, the merest handful of
-flesh and bone, divest herself at will of her personality, and assume the
-tragic horror of Lady Macbeth, or the passionate rapture of Juliet
-detaining her husband-lover on the balcony of her chamber. Hubert watched
-in wonderment this girl, so weak and languid in her own nature, awaking
-only to life when she assumed the personality of another. There she lay,
-her wispy form stretched in his arm-chair, her great dark eyes fixed, her
-mind at rest, sunk in some inscrutable dream. Her thin hand lay on the arm
-of the chair: when she woke from her day-dream she burst into irresponsible
-laughter, or questioned him with petulant curiosity. He looked again: her
-dark curling <a name="022.png" class="pb"></a> hair hung on her swarthy
-neck, and she was somewhat untidily dressed in blue linen.</p>
-
-<p>'Were you ever in love?' she said suddenly. 'I don't suppose you could
-be; you are too occupied with your play. I don't know, though; you might be
-in love, but I don't think that many women would be in love with you....
-You are too good a man, and women don't like good men.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert laughed, and without a trace of offended vanity in his voice he
-said, 'I don't profess to be much of a lady-killer.'</p>
-
-<p>'You don't know what I mean,' she said, looking at him fixedly, a maze
-of half-childish, half-artistic curiosity in her handsome eyes.</p>
-
-<p>Perplexed in his shy, straightford nature, Hubert inquired if she took
-sugar in her tea. She said she did; stretched her feet to the fire, and
-lapsed into dream. She was one of the enigmas of Stageland. She supported
-herself, and went about by herself, looking a poor, lost little thing. She
-spoke with considerable freedom of language on all subjects, but no one had
-been able to fix a lover upon her.</p>
-
-<p>'What a part Lady Hayward is! But tell me,&mdash;I don't quite catch your
-meaning in the second act. Is this it?' and starting to her feet, she
-became in a <a name="023.png" class="pb"></a> moment another being. With a
-gesture, a look, an intonation, she was the woman of the play,&mdash;a woman
-taken by an instinct, long submerged, but which has floated to the surface,
-and is beginning to command her actions. In another moment she had slipped
-back into her weary lymphatic nature, at once prematurely old and
-extravagantly childish. She could not talk of indifferent things; and
-having asked some strange questions, and laughed loudly, she wished Hubert
-'Good-afternoon' in her curious, irresponsible fashion, taking her leave
-abruptly.</p>
-
-<p>The next two days Hubert devoted entirely to his play. There were things
-in it which he knew were good, but it was incomplete. Montague Ford would
-not produce it in its present form. He must put his shoulder to the wheel
-and get it right; one more push, that was all that was wanted. And he could
-be heard walking to and fro, up and down, along and across his tiny
-sitting-room, stopping suddenly to take a note of an idea that had occurred
-to him.</p>
-
-<p>One day he went to Hampstead Heath. A long walk, he thought, would clear
-his mind, and he returned home thinking of his play. The sunset still
-glittering in the skies; the bare trees were beautifully distinct on the
-blue background of the suburban street, <a name="024.png" class="pb"></a>
-and at the end of the long perspective, a 'bus and a hansom could be seen
-coming towards him. As they grew larger, his thoughts defined themselves,
-and the distressing problem of his fourth act seemed to solve itself. That
-very evening he would sketch out a new dramatic movement around which all
-the other movements of the act would cluster. But at the corner of Fitzroy
-Square, within a few yards of No. 17, he was accosted by a shabbily-dressed
-man, who inquired if he were Mr. Price. On being answered in the
-affirmative, the shabbily-dressed man said, 'Then I have something for ye;
-I have been a-watching for ye for the last three days, but ye didn't come
-out; missed yer this morning: 'ere it is;' and he thrust a folded paper
-into Hubert's hand.</p>
-
-<p>'What is this?'</p>
-
-<p>'Don't yer know?' he said with a grin; 'Messrs. Tomkins &amp; Co.,
-Tailors, writ&mdash;twenty-two pound odd.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert made no answer; he put the paper in his pocket, opened the door
-quietly, stole up to his room, and sat down to think. The first thing to do
-was to examine into his finances. It was alarming to find that he was
-breaking into his last five-pound note. True that he was close on the end
-of his play, and when it was finished he would be able to draw on Ford. But
-a <a name="025.png" class="pb"></a> summons to appear in the county court
-could not fail to do him immense injury. He had heard of avoiding service,
-but he knew little of the law, and wondered what power the service of the
-writ gave his creditor over him. His instinct was to escape&mdash;hide himself
-where they would not be able to find him, and so obtain time to finish his
-play. But he owed his landlady money, and his departure would have to be
-clandestine. As he reflected on how many necessaries he might carry away in
-a newspaper, he began to feel strangely like a criminal, and while rolling
-up a couple of shirts, a few pairs of socks, and some collars, he paused,
-his hands resting on the parcel. He did not seem to know himself, and it
-was difficult to believe that he really intended to leave the house in this
-disreputable fashion. Mechanically he continued to add to his parcel,
-thinking all the while that he must go, otherwise his play would never be
-written.</p>
-
-<p>He had been working very well for the last few days, and now he saw his
-way quite clearly; the inspiration he had been so long waiting for had come
-at last, and he felt sure of his fourth act. At the same time he wished to
-conduct himself honestly, even in this distressing situation. Should he
-tell his landlady the truth? But the desire to realise his idea was
-intolerable, <a name="026.png" class="pb"></a> and, yielding as if before
-an irresistible force, he tied the parcel and prepared to go. At that
-moment he remembered that he must leave a note for his landlady, and he was
-more than ever surprised at the naturalness with which lying phrases came
-into his head. But when it came to committing them to paper, he found he
-could not tell an absolute lie, and he wrote a simple little note to the
-effect that he had been called away on urgent business, and hoped to return
-in about a week.</p>
-
-<p>He descended the stairs softly. Mrs. Wilson's sitting-room opened on to
-the passage; she might step out at any moment, and intercept his exit. He
-had nearly reached the last flight when he remembered that he had forgotten
-his manuscripts. His flesh turned cold, his heart stood still. There was
-nothing for it but to ascend those creaking stairs again. His already
-heavily encumbered pockets could not be persuaded to receive more than a
-small portion of the manuscripts. He gathered them in his hand, and
-prepared to redescend the perilous stairs. He walked as lightly as
-possible, dreading that every creak would bring Mrs. Wilson from her
-parlour. A few more steps, and he would be in the passage. A smell of dust,
-sounds of children crying, children talking in the kitchen! A few more
-steps, and, with his eyes on the parlour door, <a name="027.png"
-class="pb"></a> Hubert had reached the rug at the foot of the stairs. He
-hastened along, the passage. Mrs. Wilson was a moment too late. His hand
-was on the street-door when she appeared at the door of her parlour.</p>
-
-<p>'Mr. Price, I want to speak to you before you go out. There has&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I can't wait&mdash;running to catch a train. You'll find a letter on my
-table. It will explain.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert slipped out, closed the door, and ran down the street, and it was
-not until he had put two or three streets between him and Fitzroy Street
-that he relaxed his pace, and could look behind him without dreading to
-feel the hand of the 'writter' upon his shoulder.</p>
-
-<a name="028.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>III</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Then</span> he wandered, not knowing where he
-was going, still in the sensation of his escape, a little amused, and yet
-with a shadow of fear upon his soul, for he grew more and more conscious of
-the fact that he was homeless, if not quite penniless. Suddenly he stopped
-walking. Night was thickening in the street, and he had to decide where he
-would sleep. He could not afford to pay more than five or six shillings a
-week for a room, and he thought of Holloway, as being a neighbourhood where
-creditors would not be able to find him. So he retraced his steps, and,
-tired and footsore, entered the Tottenham Court Road by the Oxford Street
-end.</p>
-
-<p>There the omnibuses stopped. A conductor shouted for fares, with the
-light of the public-house lamps on his open mouth. There was smell of mud,
-of damp clothes, of bad tobacco, and where the lights of the costermongers'
-barrows broke across the footway the picture was of a group of three
-coarse, loud-voiced girls, <a name="029.png" class="pb"></a> followed by
-boys. There were fish shops, cheap Italian restaurants, and the long lines
-of low houses vanished in crapulent night. The characteristics of the
-Tottenham Court Road impressed themselves on Hubert's mind, and he thought
-how he would have to bear for at least three weeks with all the grime of
-its poverty. It would take about that time to finish his play, and the
-neighbourhood would suit his purpose excellently well. So long as he did
-not pass beyond it he ran little risk of discovery, and to secure himself
-against friends and foes he penetrated farther northward, not stopping till
-he reached the confines of Holloway.</p>
-
-<p>Then a little dim street caught his eye, and he knocked at the door of
-the first house exhibiting a card in the parlour window. But they did not
-let their bedroom under seven shillings, and this seemed to Hubert to be an
-extravagant price. He tried farther on, and at last found a clean room for
-six shillings. Having no luggage, he paid a week's rent in advance, and the
-landlady promised to get him a small table, on which he could write, a
-small table that would fit in somewhere near the window. She asked him when
-he would like to be called, and put the candlestick on the chair. Hubert
-looked round the room, and a moment sufficed to complete the survey. It was
-about seven <a name="030.png" class="pb"></a> feet long. The lower half of
-the window was curtained by a piece of muslin hardly bigger than a
-good-sized pocket-handkerchief; to do anything in this room except to lie
-in bed seemed difficult, and Hubert sat down on the bed and emptied out his
-pockets. He had just four pounds, and the calculation how long he could
-live on such a sum took him some time. His breakfast, whether he had it at
-home or in the coffee-house, would cost him at least fourpence. He thought
-he would be able to obtain a fairly good dinner in one of the little
-Italian restaurants for ninepence. His tea would cost the same as his
-breakfast. To these sums he must add twopence for tobacco and a penny for
-an evening paper&mdash;impossible to do without tobacco, and he must know what
-was going on in the world. He could therefore live for one shilling and
-eightpence a day&mdash;eleven shillings a week&mdash;to which he would have to add
-six shillings a week for rent, altogether seventeen shillings a week. He
-really did not see how he could do it cheaper. Four times seventeen are
-sixty-eight; sixty-eight shillings for a month of life, and he had eighty
-shillings&mdash;twelve shillings for incidental expenses; and out of that twelve
-shillings he must buy a shirt, a sponge, and a tooth brush, and when they
-were bought there would be very little left. He must finish his <a
-name="031.png" class="pb"></a> play under the month. Nothing could be
-clearer than that.</p>
-
-<p>Next morning he asked the landlady to let him have a cup of tea and some
-bread and butter, and he ate as much bread as he could, to save himself
-from being hungry in the middle of the day. He began work immediately, and
-continued until seven, and feeling then somewhat light-headed, but
-satisfied with himself, went to the nearest Italian restaurant. The food
-was better than he expected; but he spent twopence more than he had
-intended, so, to accustom himself to a life of strict measure and
-discipline, he determined to forego his tea that evening. And so he lived
-and worked until the end of the week.</p>
-
-<p>But the situation he had counted on to complete his fourth act had
-proved almost impracticable in the working out; he laboured on, however,
-and at the end of the tenth day at least one scene satisfied him. He read
-it over slowly, carefully, thought about it, decided that it was excellent,
-and lay down on his bed to consider it. At that moment it struck him that
-he had better calculate how much he had spent in the last ten days. He
-gathered himself into a sitting posture and counted his money; he had spent
-thirty shillings, and at that rate his money would not hold out till the
-end <a name="032.png" class="pb"></a> of the month. He must reduce his
-expenditure; but how? Impossible to find a room where he could live more
-cheaply than in the one he had got, and it is not easy to dine in London on
-less than ninepence. Only the poor can live cheaply. He pressed his hands
-to his face. His head seemed like splitting, and his monetary difficulty,
-united with his literary difficulties, produced a momentary insanity. Work
-that morning was impossible, so he went out to study the eating-houses of
-the neighbourhood. He must find one where he could dine for sixpence. Or he
-might buy a pound of cooked beef and take it home with him in a paper bag;
-but that would seem an almost intolerable imprisonment in his little room.
-He could go to a public-house and dine off a sausage and potato. But at
-that moment his attention was caught by black letters on a dun, yellowish
-ground: 'Lockhart's Cocoa Rooms.' Not having breakfasted, he decided to
-have a cup of cocoa and a roll.</p>
-
-<p>It was a large, barn-like place, the walls covered with a coat of
-grey-blue paint. Under the window there was a zinc counter, with zinc urns
-always steaming, emiting odours of tea, coffee, and cocoa. The seats were
-like those which give a garden-like appearance to the tops of some
-omnibuses. Each was made to hold <a name="033.png" class="pb"></a> two
-persons, and the table between them was large enough for four plates and
-four pairs of hands. A few hollow-chested men, the pale vagrants of
-civilisation, drowsed in the corners. They had been hunted through the
-night by the policeman, and had come in for something hot. Hubert noted the
-worn frock-coats, and the miserable arms coming out of shirtless sleeves.
-One looked up inquiringly, and Hubert thought how slight had become the
-line that divided him from the outcast. A serving-maid collected the
-plates, knives and forks, when the customers left, and carried them back to
-the great zinc counter.</p>
-
-<p>Impressed by his appearance, she brought him what he had ordered and
-took the money for it, although the custom of the place was for the
-customer to pay for food at the counter and carry it himself to the table
-at which he chose to eat. Hubert learnt that there was no set dinner, but
-there was a beef-steak pudding at one, price fourpence, a penny potatoes, a
-penny bread. So by dining at Lockhart's he would be able to cut down his
-daily expense by at least twopence; that would extend the time to finish
-his play by nearly a week. And if his appetite were not keen, he could
-assuage it with a penny plum pudding; or he could take a middle course,
-making his dinner off a sausage <a name="034.png" class="pb"></a> and
-mashed potatoes. The room was clean, well lighted, and airy; he could read
-his paper there, and forget his troubles in the observation of character.
-He even made friends. An old wizen creature, who had been a prize-fighter,
-told him of his triumphs. If he hadn't broke his hand on somebody's nose
-he'd have been champion light-weight of England. 'And to think that I have
-come to this,' he added emphatically. 'Even them boys knock me about now,
-and 'alf a century ago I could 'ave cleared the bloomin' place.' There was
-a merry little waif from the circus who loved to come and sit with Hubert.
-She had been a rider, she said, but had broken her leg on one occasion, and
-cut her head all open on another, and had ended by running away with some
-one who had deserted her. 'So here I am,' she remarked, with a burst of
-laughter, 'talking to you. Did you never hear of Dolly Dayrell?' Hubert
-confessed that he had not. 'Why,' she said, 'I thought every one had.'</p>
-
-<p>About eight o'clock in the evening, the table near the stairs was
-generally occupied by flower-girls, dressed in dingy clothes, and brightly
-feathered hats. They placed their empty baskets on the floor, and shouted
-at their companions&mdash;men who sold newspapers, boot-laces, and cheap toys.
-About nine the boys came in, <a name="035.png" class="pb"></a> the boys who
-used to push the old prize-fighter about, and Hubert soon began to perceive
-how representative they were of all vices&mdash;gambling, theft, idleness, and
-cruelty were visible in their faces. They were led by a Jew boy who sold
-penny jewellery at the corner of Oxford Street, and they generally made for
-the tables at the end of the room, for there, unless custom was slack
-indeed, they could defeat the vigilance of the serving-maid and play at nap
-at their ease. The tray of penny jewellery was placed at the corner of a
-table, and a small boy set to watch over it. His duty was also to shuffle
-his feet when the servant-maid approached, and a precious drubbing he got
-if he failed to shuffle them loud enough. The ''ot un,' as he was
-nicknamed, always had a pack of cards in his pocket, and to annex
-everything left on the tables he considered to be his privilege. One day,
-when he was asked how he came by the fine carnation in his buttonhole, he
-said it was a present from Sally, neglecting to add that he had told the
-child to steal it from a basket which a flower-girl had just put down.</p>
-
-<a name="036.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<div class="image"><a href="images/image02.jpeg"><img src="images/image02-thumb.jpeg"
-align="left" alt="[drawing]"></a>
-
-"'A dirty, hignominious lot, them boys is.'"</div>
-
-<br>
-
-<a name="037.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<a name="038.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Hubert hated this boy, and once could not resist boxing his ears. The
-''ot un' writhed easily out of his reach, and then assailed him with foul
-language, and so loud were his words that they awoke the innocent cause of
-the quarrel, a weak, sickly-looking man, with pale blue eyes and a blonde
-beard. Hubert had protected him before now against the brutality of the
-boys, who, when they were not playing nap, divided their pleasantries
-between him and the decrepit prize-fighter. He came in about nine, took a
-cup of coffee from the counter, and settled himself for a snooze. The boys
-knew this, and it was their amusement to keep him awake by pelting him with
-egg-shells and other missiles. Hubert noticed that he had always with him a
-red handkerchief full of some sort of loose rubbish, which the boys
-gathered when it fell about the floor, or purloined from the handkerchief
-when they judged that the owner was sufficiently fast asleep. Hubert now
-saw that the handkerchief was filled with bits of coloured chalk, and
-guessed that the man must be a pavement artist.</p>
-
-<p>'A dirty, hignominious lot, them boys is,' said the artist, fixing his
-pale, melancholy eyes on Hubert; 'bad manners, no eddication, and, above
-all, no respect.'</p>
-
-<p>'They are an unmannerly lot&mdash;that Jew boy especially. I don't think
-there's a vice he hasn't got.'</p>
-
-<p>The artist stared at Hubert a long time in silence. A thought seemed to
-be stirring in his mind.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm speaking, I can see, to a man of eddication. <a name="039.png"
-class="pb"></a> I'm a fust-rate judge of character, though I be but a
-pavement artist; but a picture's none the less a picture, no matter where
-it is drawn. That's true, ain't it?'</p>
-
-<p>'Quite true. A horse is a horse, and an ass is an ass, no matter what
-stable you put them into.'</p>
-
-<p>The artist laughed a guttural laugh, and, fixing his pale blue porcelain
-eyes on Hubert, he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; see I made no bloomin' error when I said you was a man of
-eddication. A literary gent, I should think. In the reporting line, most
-like. Down in the luck like myself. What was it&mdash;drink? Got the chuck?'</p>
-
-<p>'No,' said Hubert, 'never touch it. Out of work.'</p>
-
-<p>'No offence, master, we're all mortal, we is all weak, and in misfortune
-we goes to it. It was them boys that drove me to it.'</p>
-
-<p>'How was that?'</p>
-
-<p>'They was always round my show; no getting rid of them, and their
-remarks created a disturbance; the perlice said he wouldn't 'ave it, and
-when the perlice won't 'ave it, what's a poor man to do? They are that
-hignorant. But what's the use of talking of it, it only riles me.' The
-blue-eyed man lay back in his seat, and his head sank on his chest. He
-looked as if he were going to sleep again, but on Hubert's asking him to
-explain his troubles, he leaned across the table.</p>
-
-<a name="040.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Well, I'll tell yer. Yer be an eddicated man, and I likes to talk to
-them that 'as 'ad an eddication. Yer says, and werry truly, just now, that
-changing the stable don't change an 'orse into a hass, or a hass into an
-'orse. That is werry true, most true, none but a eddicated man could 'ave
-made that 'ere hobservation. I likes yer for it. Give us yer 'and. The
-public just thinks too much of the stable, and not enough of what's inside.
-Leastways that's my experience of the public, and I 'ave been a-catering
-for the public ever since I was a growing lad&mdash;sides of bacon, ships on
-fire, good old ship on fire.... I knows the public. Yer don't follow
-me?'</p>
-
-<p>'Not quite.'</p>
-
-<p>'A moment, and I'll explain. You'll admit there's no blooming reason
-except the public's blooming hignorance why a man shouldn't do as good a
-picture on the pavement as on a piece of canvas, provided he 'ave the
-blooming genius. There is no doubt that with them 'ere chalks and a nice
-smooth stone that Raphael&mdash;I 'ave been to the National Gallery and 'ave
-studied 'is work, and werry fine some of it is, although I don't altogether
-hold&mdash;but that's another matter. What was I a-saying of? I remember,&mdash;that
-with them 'ere chalks, and a nice smooth stone, there's no reason why <a
-name="041.png" class="pb"></a> a masterpiece shouldn't be done. That's
-right, ain't it? I ask you, as a man of eddication, to say if that ain't
-right; as a representative of the Press, I asks you to say.' Hubert nodded,
-and the pale-eyed man continued. 'Well, that's what the public won't see,
-can't see. Raphael, says I, could 'ave done a masterpiece with them 'ere
-chalks and a nice smooth stone. But do yer think 'e 'd 'ave been allowed?
-Do yer think the perlice would 'ave stood it? Do yer think the public would
-'ave stood him doing masterpieces on the pavement? I'd give 'im just one
-afternoon. Them boys would 'ave got 'im into trouble, just as they did me.
-Raphael would 'ave been told to wipe them out just as I was.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused; and, half amused, half frightened, Hubert
-considered the pale vague face, and he was struck by the scattered look of
-aspiration that wandered in the pale blue eyes.</p>
-
-<p>'I'll tell you,' said the man, growing more excited, and leaning further
-across the table; 'I'll tell you, because I knows you for an eddicated man,
-and won't blab. S'pose yer thinks, like the rest of the world, that the
-chaps wot smears, for it ain't drawing, the pavement with bits of bacon, a
-ship on fire, and the regulation oysters, does them out of their own
-'eads?' Hubert nodded. 'I'm not surprised that you do, all the world do,
-and <a name="042.png" class="pb"></a> the public chucks down its coppers to
-the poor hartist; but 'e aint no hartist, no more than is them 'ere boys
-that did for my show.' Leaning still further forward, he lowered his voice
-to a whisper. 'They learns it all by 'art; there is schools for the
-teaching of it down in Whitechapel. They can just do what they learns by
-'art, not one of them could draw that 'ere chair or table from natur'; but
-I could. I 'ave an original talent. It was a long time afore I found out it
-was there,' he said, tapping his forehead; 'but it is there,' he said,
-fixing his eyes on Hubert, 'and when it is there they can't take it away&mdash;I
-mean my mates&mdash;though they do laugh at my ideas. They call me "the genius,"
-for they don't believe in me, but I believe in myself, and they laughs best
-that laughs last.... I don't know,' he said, looking round him, his eyes
-full of reverie, 'that the public liked my fancy landscapes better than the
-ship on fire, but I said the public will come to them in time, and I
-continued my fancy landscapes. But one day in Trafalgar Square it came on
-to rain very 'eavy, and I went for shelter into the National Gallery. It
-was my fust visit, and I was struck all of a 'eap, and ever since I can
-'ardly bring myself to go on with the drudgery of the piece of bacon, and
-the piece of cheese, with the mouse nibbling at it. And ever since my <a
-name="043.png" class="pb"></a> 'ead 'as been filled with other things,
-though for a long time I could not make exactly out what. I 'ave 'eard that
-that is always the case with men that 'as an idea&mdash;daresay you 'ave found
-it so yourself. So in my spare time I goes to the National to think it out,
-and in studying the pictures there I got wery interested in a chap called
-Hetty, and 'e do paint the female form divine. I says to myself, Why not go
-in for lovely woman? the public may not care for fancy landscapes, but the
-public allus likes a lovely woman, and, as well as being popular, lovely
-woman is 'igh 'art. So, after dinner hour, I sets to work, and sketches in
-a blue sea with three bathers, and two boxes, with the 'orse's head looking
-out from behind one of the boxes. For a fust attempt at the nude, I assure
-you&mdash;it ain't my way to blow my own trumpet, but I can say that the crowd
-that 'ere picture did draw was bigger than any that 'ad assembled about the
-bits o' bacon and ship-a-fire of all the other coves. 'Ad I been let alone,
-I should 'ave made my fortune, but the crowd was so big and the curiosity
-so great that it took the perlice all their time to keep the pavement from
-being blocked. It wasn't that the public didn't like it enough, it was that
-the public liked it too much, that was the reason of my misfortune.'</p>
-
-<a name="044.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'What do you mean?' said Hubert.</p>
-
-<p>'Well, yer see them boys was a-hawking their cheap toys in the
-neighbourhood, and when they got wind of my success they comes round to
-see, and they remains on account of the crowd. Pockets was picked, I don't
-say they wasn't, and the perlice turned rusty, and then a pious old gent
-comes along, and 'earing the remarks of them boys, which I admit wasn't
-nice, complains to the hauthorities, and I was put down! Now, what I wants
-to know is why my art should be made to suffer for the beastly-mindedness
-of them 'ere boys.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert admitted that there seemed to be an injustice somewhere, and
-asked the artist if he had never tried again.</p>
-
-<p>'Try again? Should think I did. When once a man 'as tasted of 'igh art,
-he can't keep his blooming fingers out of it. It was impossible after the
-success of my bathers to go back to the bacon, so I thought I would
-circumvent the hauthorities. I goes to the National Gallery, makes a
-sketch, 'ere it is,' and after some fumbling in his breast pocket, he
-produced a greasy piece of paper, which he handed to Hubert. 'S'pose yer
-know the picture?' Hubert admitted that he did not. 'Well, that is a
-drawing from Gainsborough's celebrated picture of Medora a-washing of <a
-name="045.png" class="pb"></a> her feet.... But the perlice wouldn't 'ave
-it any more than my original, 'e said it was worse than the bathers at
-Margaret, and when I told the hignorant brute wot it was, 'e said he wanted
-no hargument, that 'e wouldn't 'ave it.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert had noticed, during the latter part of the narrative, a look of
-dubious cunning twinkling in the pale eyes; but now this look died away,
-and the eyes resumed their habitual look of vague reverie.</p>
-
-<p>'I've been 'ad up before the Beak: from him I expected more
-enlightenment, but he, too, said 'e wouldn't 'ave it, and I got a month.
-But I'll beat them yet, the public is on my side, and if it worn't for them
-'ere boys, I'd say that the public could be helevated. They calls me "the
-genius," and they is right.' Then something seemed to go out like a flame,
-the face grew dim, and changed expression. 'It is 'ere all right,' he said,
-no longer addressing Hubert, but speaking to himself, 'and since it is
-there, it must come out.'</p>
-
-<a name="046.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>IV</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Hubert</span> at last found himself obliged to
-write to Ford for an advance of money. But Ford replied that he would
-advance money only on the delivery of the completed manuscript. And the
-whole of one night, in a room hardly eight feet long, sitting on his bed,
-he strove to complete the fourth and fifth acts. But under the pressure of
-such necessity ideas died within him. And all through the night, and even
-when the little window, curtained with a bit of muslin hardly bigger than a
-pocket-handkerchief, had grown white with dawn, he sat gazing at the sheet
-of paper, his brain on fire, unable to think. Laying his pen down in
-despair, he thought of the thousands who would come to his aid if they only
-knew&mdash;if they only knew! And soon after he heard life beginning again in
-the little brick street. He felt that his brain was giving way, that if he
-did not find change, whatever it was, he must surely run raving mad. He had
-had enough of England, and would leave it for America, Australia<a
-name="047.png" class="pb"></a>&mdash;anywhere. He wanted change. The present was
-unendurable. How would he get to America? Perhaps a clerkship on board one
-of the great steamships might be obtained.</p>
-
-<p>The human animal in extreme misery becomes self-reliant, and Hubert
-hardly thought of making application to his uncle. The last time he had
-applied for help his letter had remained unanswered, and he now felt that
-he must make his own living or die. And, quite indifferent as to what might
-befall him, he walked next day to the Victoria Docks. He did not know where
-or how to apply for work, and he tired himself in fruitless endeavour. At
-last he felt he could strive with fate no longer, and wandered mile after
-mile, amused and forgetful of his own misery in the spectacle of the
-river&mdash;the rose sky, the long perspectives, the houses and warehouses
-showing in fine outline, and then the wonderful blue night gathering in the
-forest of masts and rigging. He was admirably patient. There was no
-fretfulness in his soul, nor did he rail against the world's injustice, but
-took his misfortunes with sweet gentleness.</p>
-
-<p>He slept in a public-house, and next day resumed his idle search for
-employment. The weather was mild and beautiful, his wants were simple, a
-cup of coffee <a name="048.png" class="pb"></a> and a roll, a couple of
-sausages, and the day passed in a sort of morose and passionless
-contemplation. He thought of everything and nothing, least of all of how he
-should find money for the morrow. When the day came, and the penny to buy a
-cup of coffee was wanting, he quite naturally, without giving it a second
-thought, engaged himself as a labourer, and worked all day carrying sacks
-of grain out of a vessel's hold. For a large part of his nature was patient
-and simple, docile as an animal's. There was in him so much that was
-rudimentary, that in accepting this burden of physical toil he was acting
-not in contradiction to, but in full and perfect harmony with, his true
-nature.</p>
-
-<p>But at the end of a week his health began to give way, and, like a man
-after a violent debauch, he thought of returning to a more normal
-existence. He had left the manuscript of his unfortunate play in the North.
-Had they destroyed it? The involuntary fear of the writer for his child
-made him smile. What did it matter? Clearly the first thing to do would be
-to write to the editor of <i>The Cosmopolitan</i>, and ask if he could find
-him some employment, something certain; writing occasional articles for
-newspapers, that he couldn't do.</p> <a name="049.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Hubert had saved twelve shillings. He would therefore be able to pay his
-landlady: he smiled&mdash;one of his landladies! The earlier debt was now
-hopelessly out of his reach, and seemed to represent a social plane from
-which he had for ever fallen. If he had succeeded in getting that play
-right, what a difference it would have made! He would have been able to do
-a number of things he had never done, things which he had always desired to
-do. He had desired above all to travel&mdash;to see France and Italy; to linger,
-to muse in the shadows of the world's past; and after this he had desired
-marriage, an English wife, an English home, beautiful children, leisure,
-the society of friends. A successful play would have given him all these
-things, and now his dream must remain for ever unrealised by him. He had
-sunk out of sight and hearing of such life.</p>
-
-<p>Rose was another; she might sink as he had sunk; she might never find
-the opportunity of realising her desire. How well she would have played
-that part! He knew what was in her. And now! What did his failure to write
-that play condemn him to? Heaven only knows, he did not wish to think.
-Strange, was it not strange?... A man of genius&mdash;many believed him a
-genius&mdash;and yet he was incapable of earning his <a name="050.png"
-class="pb"></a> daily bread otherwise than by doing the work of a navvy.
-Even that he could not do well, society had softened his muscles and
-effeminised his constitution. Indeed, he did not know what life fate had
-willed him for. He seemed to be out of place everywhere. His best chance
-was to try to obtain a clerkship. The editor of <i>The Cosmopolitan</i>
-might be able to do that for him; if he could not, far better it would be
-to leave a world in which he was <i>out of place</i>, and through no fault
-of his own&mdash;that was the hard part of it. Hard part! Nonsense! What does
-Fate know of our little rights and wrongs&mdash;or care? Her intentions are
-inscrutable; she watches us come and go, and gives no sign. Prayers are
-vain. The good man is punished, and the wicked is sent on his way
-rejoicing.</p>
-
-<p>In such mournful thought, his clothes stained and torn, with all the
-traces of a week's toil in the docks upon them, Hubert made his way round
-St. Paul's and across Holborn. As he was about to cross into Oxford Street,
-he heard some one accost him,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, Mr. Price, is that you?' It was Rose. 'Where have you been all this
-time?'</p>
-
-<p>She seemed so strange, so small, and so much alone in the great
-thoroughfare, that Hubert forgot all his own troubles in a sudden interest
-in this little mite. <a name="051.png" class="pb"></a> 'Where have you been
-hiding yourself?... It is lucky I met you. Don't you know that Ford has
-decided to revive <i>Divorce</i>?'</p>
-
-<p>'You don't mean it!'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; Ford said that the last acts of <i>The Gipsy</i> were not
-satisfactorily worked out, and as there was something wrong with that
-Hamilton Brown's piece, he has decided to revive <i>Divorce</i>. He says it
-never was properly played ... he thinks he'll make a hit in the husband's
-part, and I daresay he will. But I have been unfortunate again; I wanted
-the part of the adventuress. I really could play it. I don't look it, I
-know ... I have no weight, but I could play it for all that. The public
-mightn't see me in it at first, but in five minutes they would.'</p>
-
-<p>'And what part has he cast you for&mdash;the young girl?'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course; there's no other part. He says I look it; but what's the
-good of looking it when you don't feel it? If he had cast me for Mrs.
-Barrington, I should have had just the five minutes in the second act that
-I have been waiting for so long, and I should have just wiped Miss Osborne
-out, acted her off the stage.... I know I should; you needn't believe it if
-don't like, but I know I should.'</p>
-
-<a name="052.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Hubert wondered how any one could feel so sure of herself, and then he
-said, 'Yes, I think you could do just what you say.... How do you think
-Miss Osborne will play the part?'</p>
-
-<p>'She'll be correct enough; she'll miss nothing, and yet somehow she'll
-miss the whole thing. But you must go at once to Ford. He was saying only
-this morning that if you didn't turn up soon, he'd have to give up the
-idea.'</p>
-
-<p>'I can't go and see him to-night. You see what a state I'm in.'</p>
-
-<p>'You're rather dusty; where have you been? what have you been
-doing?'</p>
-
-<p>'I've been down at the dock.... I thought of going to America.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, we'll talk about that another time. It doesn't matter if you are
-a bit dusty and worn-out-looking. Now that he's going to revive your play,
-he'll let you have some money. You might get a new hat, though. I don't
-know how much they cost, but I've five shillings; can you get one for
-that?'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert thanked her.</p>
-
-<p>'But you are not offended?'</p>
-
-<p>'Offended, my dear Rose! I shall be able to manage. I'll get a brush up
-somewhere.'</p>
-
-<a name="053.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'That's all right. Now I'm going to jump into that 'bus,' and she signed
-with her parasol to the conductor. 'Mind you see Ford to-night,' she cried;
-and a moment after he saw a small space of blue back seated against one of
-the windows.</p>
-
-<a name="054.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>V</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">There</span> was much prophecy abroad.
-Stiggins' words, 'The piece never did, and never will draw money,' were
-evidently present in everybody's mind. They were visible in Ford's face,
-and more than once Hubert expected to hear that&mdash;on account of severe
-indisposition&mdash;Mr. Montague Ford has been obliged to indefinitely postpone
-his contemplated revival of Mr. Hubert Price's play <i>Divorce</i>. But,
-besides the apprehension that Stiggins' unfavourable opinion of his
-enterprise had engendered in him, Ford was obviously provoked by Hubert's
-reluctance to execute the alterations he had suggested. Night after night,
-sometimes until six in the morning, Hubert sat up considering them. Thanks
-to Ford's timely advance he was back in his old rooms in Fitzroy Street.
-All was as it had been. He was working at his play every evening, waiting
-for Rose's footsteps on the stairs. And yet a change had come into his
-life! He believed now that his feet were set on the way to fortune&mdash;that he
-would soon be happy.</p>
-
-<a name="055.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>He stared at the bright flame of the lamp, he listened to the silence.
-The clock chimed sharply, and the windows were growing grey. Hubert had
-begun to drowse in his chair; but he had promised to rewrite the young
-girl's part, Ford having definitely refused to intrust Rose with the part
-of the adventuress. He was sorry for this. He believed that Rose had not
-only talent, but genius. Besides, they were friends, neighbours; he would
-like to give her a chance of distinguishing herself&mdash;the chance which she
-was seeking. All the time he could not but realise that, however he might
-accentuate and characterise the part of the sentimental girl, Rose would
-not be able to do much with it. To bring out her special powers something
-strange, wild, or tragic was required. But of what use thinking of what was
-not to be? Having made some alterations and additions he folded his papers
-up, and addressed them to Miss Massey. He wrote on a piece of paper that
-they were to be given to her at once, and that he was to be called at ten.
-There was a rehearsal at twelve.</p>
-
-<p>On the night of the first performance, Hubert asked Rose to dine in his
-rooms. Mr. Wilson proposed that they should have a roast chicken, and Annie
-was sent to fetch a bottle of champagne from the <a name="056.png"
-class="pb"></a> grocer's. Annie had been given a ticket for the pit. Mrs.
-Wilson was going to the upper boxes. Annie said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Why, you look as if you was going to a funeral, and not to a play. Why
-don't ye laugh?'</p>
-
-<p>In truth, Hubert and Rose were a little silent. Rose was thinking how
-she could say certain lines. She had said them right once at rehearsal, but
-had not since been able to reproduce to her satisfaction a certain effect
-of voice. Hubert was too nervous to talk. There was nothing in his mind but
-'Will the piece succeed? What shall I do if it fails?' He could give heed
-to nothing but himself, all the world seemed blotted out, and he suffered
-the pain of excessive self-concentration. Rose, on the other hand, had lost
-sight of herself, and existed almost unconsciously in the soul of another
-being. She was sometimes like a hypnotised spectator watching with foolish,
-involuntary curiosity the actions of one whom she had been bidden to watch.
-Then a little cloud would gather over her eyes, and then this other being
-would rise as if out of her very entrails and recreate her, fashioning her
-to its own image and likeness.</p>
-
-<p>She did not answer when she was spoken to, and <a name="057.png"
-class="pb"></a> when the question was repeated, she awoke with a little
-start. Dinner was eaten in morbid silence, with painful and fitful efforts
-to appear interested in each other. Walking to the theatre, they once took
-the wrong turning and had to ask the way. At the stage door they smiled
-painfully, nodded, glad to part. Hubert went up to Montague Ford's room. He
-found the comedian on a low stool, seated before a low table covered with
-brushes and cosmetics, in front of a triple glass.</p>
-
-<p>'My dear friend, do not trouble me now. I am thinking of my part.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert turned to go.</p>
-
-<p>'Stay a moment,' cried the actor. 'You know when the husband meets the
-wife he has divorced?'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert remembered the moment referred to, and, with anxious, doubting
-eyes, the comedian sought from the author justification for some
-intonations and gestures which seemed to him to form part and parcel of the
-nature of the man whose drunkenness he had so admirably depicted on his
-face.</p>
-
-<p>'"<i>This is most unfortunate, very unlucky&mdash;very, my dear Louisa;
-but&mdash;&mdash;</i>"</p>
-
-<p>'"<i>I am no longer obliged to bear with your insults; I can now defend
-myself against you.</i>"</p>
-
-<a name="058.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<div class="image"><a href="images/image03.jpeg"><img src="images/image03-thumb.jpeg"
-align="left" alt="[drawing]"></a>
-
-"In the third row Harding stood talking to a young man." </div>
-
-<br>
-
-<a name="059.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<a name="060.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Now, is that your idea of the scene?'</p>
-
-<p>A pained look came upon Hubert's face. 'Don't question me now, my dear
-fellow. I cannot fix my attention. I can see, however, that your make-up is
-capital&mdash;you are the man himself.'</p>
-
-<p>The actor was satisfied, and in his satisfaction he said, 'I think it
-will be all right, old chap.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert hoped to reach his box without meeting critics or authors. The
-serving-maids bowed and smiled,&mdash;he was the author of the play. 'They'll
-think still more of me if the notices are right,' he thought, as he hurried
-upstairs, and from behind the curtain of his box he peeped down and counted
-the critics who edged their way down the stalls. Harding stood in the third
-row talking to a young man. He said, 'You mean the woman with the black
-hair piled into a point, and fastened with a steel circlet. A face of
-sheep-like sensuality. Red lips and a round receding chin. A large bosom,
-and two thin arms showing beneath the opera cloak, which she has not yet
-thrown from her shoulders. I do not know her&mdash;<i>une laideur attirante</i>.
-Many a man might be interested in her. But do you see the woman in the
-stage-box? You would not believe it, but she is sixty, and has only just
-begun to speak of herself as an <a name="061.png" class="pb"></a> old
-woman. She kept her figure, and had an admirer when she was
-fifty-eight.'</p>
-
-<p>'What has become of him?'</p>
-
-<p>'They quarrelled; two years ago he told her he hoped never to see her
-ugly old face again. And that delicate little creature in the box next to
-her&mdash;that pale diaphanous face?'</p>
-
-<p>'With a young man hanging over her whispering in her ear?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes. She hates the theatre; it gives her neuralgia; but she attends all
-the first nights because her one passion is to be made love to in public.
-If her admirer did not hang over her in front of the box just as that man
-is doing, she would not tolerate him for a week.'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment the conversation was interrupted by a new-comer, who
-asked if he had seen the play when it was first produced.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes,' said Harding; 'I did.' And he continued his search for
-acquaintances amid white rows of female backs, necks, and half-seen
-profiles&mdash;amid the black cloth shoulders cut sharply upon the illumined
-curtain.</p>
-
-<p>'And what do you think of it? Do you think it will succeed this
-time?'</p>
-
-<p>'Ford will create an impression in the part; but I don't think the piece
-will run.'</p>
-
-<a name="062.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'And why? Because the public is too stupid?'</p>
-
-<p>'Partly, and partly because Price is only an intentionist. He cannot
-carry an idea quite through.'</p>
-
-<p>'Are you going to write about it?'</p>
-
-<p>'I may.'</p>
-
-<p>'And what will you say?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, most interesting things to be said. Let's take the case of Hubert
-Price ... Ah, there, the curtain is going up.'</p>
-
-<p>The curtain rolled slowly up, and in a small country drawing-room, in
-very simple but very pointedly written dialogue, the story of Mrs. Holmes'
-domestic misfortunes was gradually unfolded. It appeared that she had
-flirted with Captain Grey; he had written her some compromising letters,
-and she had once been to his rooms alone. So the Court had pronounced a
-decree <i>nisi</i>. But Mrs. Holmes had not been unfaithful to her husband.
-She had flirted with Captain Grey because her husband's attentions to a
-certain Mrs. Barrington had maddened her, and in her jealous rage had
-written foolish letters, and been to see Captain Grey.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert noticed that folk were still asking for their seats, and pushing
-down the very rows in which the most influential critics were sitting. They
-exchanged a salutation with their friends in the dress-circle, and, <a
-name="063.png" class="pb"></a> when they were seated, looked around, making
-observations regarding the appearance of the house; and all the while the
-actors were speaking. Hubert trembled with fear and rage. Would these
-people never give their attention to the stage? If they had been sitting by
-him, he could have struck them. Then a line turned into nonsense by the
-actress who played Mrs. Holmes was a lancinating pain; and the actor who
-played Captain Grey, played so slowly that Hubert could hardly refrain from
-calling from his box. He looked round the theatre, noticing the indifferent
-faces of the critics, and the women's shoulders seemed to him especially
-vacuous and imbecile.</p>
-
-<p>The principal scene of the second act was between Mrs. Holmes and the
-man who had divorced her. He has-been driven to drink by the vile behaviour
-of his second wife; he is ruined in health and in pocket, and has come to
-the woman he wronged to beg forgiveness; he knows she has learnt to love
-Captain Grey, but will not marry him, because she believes that once
-married always married. There is only one thing he can do to repair the
-wrong he has done&mdash;he will commit suicide, and so enable her to marry the
-man she loves. He tells her that he has bought the pistol to do it with,
-and the words, 'Not here! not here!' escape from <a name="064.png"
-class="pb"></a> her; and he answers, 'No, not here, but in a cab. I've got
-one at the door.' He goes out; Captain Grey enters, and Mrs. Holmes begs
-him to save her husband. While they are discussing how this is to be done,
-he re-enters, saying that his conscience smote him as he was going to pull
-the trigger. Will she forgive him? If she won't, he must make an end of
-himself. She says she will.</p>
-
-<p>In the third act Hubert had attempted to paint Mr. Holmes' vain efforts
-to reform his life. But the constant presence of Captain Grey in the
-household, his attempts to win Mrs. Holmes from her husband, and the
-drunken husband's amours with the servant-maid disgusted rather than
-horrified. In the fourth act the wretched husband admits that his
-reformation is impossible, and that, although he has no courage to commit
-suicide and set his wife free, he will return to his evil courses; they
-will sooner or later make an end of him. The slowness and deadly gravity
-with which Ford took this scene rendered it intolerable; and,
-notwithstanding the beauty of the conclusion, when the deserted wife, in
-the silence of her drawing-room, reads again Captain Grey's letter, telling
-her that he has left England for ever, and with another, the success of the
-play was left in doubt, and the audience <a name="065.png" class="pb"></a>
-filed out, talking, chattering, arguing, wondering what the public verdict
-would be.</p>
-
-<p>To avoid commiseration of heartless friends and the triumphant glances
-of literary enemies, Hubert passed through the door leading on to the
-stage. Scene-shifters were brutally pushing away what remained of his play;
-and the presence of Hamilton Brown, the dramatic author, talking to Ford,
-was at that moment particularly disagreeable. On catching sight of Hubert,
-Brown ran to him, shook him by the hand, and murmured some discreet
-congratulations. He preferred the piece, however, as it had been originally
-written, and suggested to Ford the advisability of returning to the first
-text. Then Ford went upstairs to take his paint off, and Hubert walked
-about the stage with Brown. Brown's insincerity was sufficiently
-transparent; but men in Hubert's position catch at straws, and he soon
-began to believe that the attitude of the public towards his play was not
-so unfavourable as he had imagined.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert tried to summon up a smile for the stage-door keeper, who, he
-feared, had heard that the piece had failed, and then the moment they got
-outside he begged Rose to tell him the exact truth. She assured him that
-Ford had said that he had always counted on a certain amount of opposition;
-but that he believed <a name="066.png" class="pb"></a> that the general
-public, being more free of prejudice and less sophisticated, would be
-impressed by the simple humanity of the play. The conversation paused, and
-at the end of an irritating silence he said, 'You were excellent, as good
-as any one could be in a part that did not suit them. Ah, if he had cast
-you for the adventuress, how you would have played it!...'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm so glad you are pleased. I hope my notices will be good. Do you
-think they will?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, your notices will be all right,' he answered, with a sigh.</p>
-
-<p>'And your notices will be all right too. No one can say what is going to
-succeed. There was a call after each of the last three acts.... I don't see
-how a piece could go better. It is the suspense....'</p>
-
-<p>'Ah, yes, the suspense!'</p>
-
-<p>They lingered on the landing, and Hubert said, 'Won't you come in for a
-moment?' She followed him into the room. His calm face, usually a perfect
-picture of repose and self-possession, betrayed his emotion by a certain
-blankness in the eyes, certain contractions in the skin of the forehead.
-'I'm afraid,' he said, 'there's no hope.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, you mustn't say that!' she replied. 'I think it <a name="067.png"
-class="pb"></a> went very well indeed.... I know I did nothing with the
-young girl. I oughtn't to have undertaken the part.'</p>
-
-<p>'You were excellent. If we only get some good notices. If we don't, I
-shall never get another play of mine acted.' He looked at her imploringly,
-thirsting for a woman's sympathy. But the little girl was thinking of
-certain effects which she would have made, and which the actress who had
-played the adventuress had failed to make.</p>
-
-<p>'I watched her all the time,' she said, 'following every line, saying
-all the time, "Oh yes, that's all very nice and very proper, my young
-woman; but it's not it; no, not at all&mdash;not within a hundred miles of it."
-I don't think she ever really touched the part&mdash;do you?' Hubert did not
-answer, and a quiver of distraction ran through the muscles of her
-face.</p>
-
-<p>'Why don't you answer me?'</p>
-
-<p>'I can't answer you,' he said abruptly. Then remembering, he added,
-'Forgive me; I can think of nothing now.' He hid his face in his hands, and
-sobbed twice&mdash;two heavy, choking sobs, pregnant with the weight of anguish
-lying on his heart.</p>
-
-<p>Seeing how much he suffered, she laid her hand on his shoulder. 'I am
-very sorry; I wish I could help <a name="068.png" class="pb"></a> you. I
-know how it tears the heart when one cannot get out what one has in one's
-brain.'</p>
-
-<p>Her artistic appreciation of his suffering only jarred him the more.
-What he longed for was some kind, simple-hearted woman who would say,
-'Never mind, dear; the play was perfectly right, only they did not
-understand it; I love you better than ever.' But Rose could not give him
-the sympathy he wanted; and to be alone was almost a relief. He dared not
-go to bed; he sat looking into space. The roar of London hushed till it was
-no more than a faint murmur, the hissing of the gas grew louder, and still
-Hubert sat thinking, the same thoughts battling in his brain. He looked
-into the future, but could see nothing but suicide. His uncle? He had
-applied to him before for help; there was no hope there. Then he tramped up
-and down, maddened by the infernal hissing of the gas; and then threw
-himself into his arm-chair. And so a terrible night wore away; and it was
-not until long after the early carts had begun to rattle in the streets
-that exhaustion brought an end to his sufferings, and he rolled into
-bed.</p>
-
-<a name="069.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>VI</h2>
-
-<p>'<span class="small-caps">What</span> will ye 'ave to eat? Eggs and
-bacon?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no!'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, then, 'ave a chop?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no!'</p>
-
-<p>'Ye must 'ave something.'</p>
-
-<p>'A cup of tea, a slice of toast. I'm not hungry.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, ye are worse than a young lady for a happetite. Miss Massey 'as
-sent you down these 'ere papers.'</p>
-
-<p>The servant-girl laid the papers on the bed, and Hubert lay back on his
-pillow, so that he might collect his thoughts. Stretching forth his hands,
-he selected the inevitable paper.</p>
-
-<p>'For those who do not believe that our English home life is composed
-mainly, if not entirely, of lying, drunkenness, and conjugal infidelity,
-and its sequel divorce, yester evening at the Queen's Theatre must have
-been a sad and dismal experience. That men and women who have vowed to love
-each other do sometimes prove false to their troth no reasonable <a
-name="070.png" class="pb"></a> man will deny. With the divorce court before
-our eyes, even the most enthusiastic believer in the natural goodness and
-ultimate perfectibility of human nature must admit that men and women are
-frail. But drunkenness and infidelity are happily not characteristic of our
-English homes. Then why, we ask, should a dramatist select such a theme,
-and by every artifice of dialogue force into prominence all that is mean
-and painful in an unfortunate woman's life? Always the same relentless
-method; the cold, passionless curiosity of the vivisector; the scalpel is
-placed under the nerve, and we are called upon to watch the quivering
-flesh. Never the kind word, the tears, the effusion, which is man's highest
-prerogative, and which separates him from the brute and signifies the
-immortal end for which he was created. We hold that it is a pity to see so
-much talent wasted, and it was indeed a melancholy sight to see so many
-capable actors and actresses labouring to&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'This is even worse than usual,' said Hubert; and glancing through half
-a column of hysterical commonplace, he came upon the following:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'But if this woman had succeeded in reclaiming from vice the man who
-unjustly divorced her, and who in his misery goes back to ask her
-forgiveness for pity's <a name="071.png" class="pb"></a> sake, what a
-lesson we should have had! And, with lightened and not with heavier hearts,
-we should have left the theatre comforted, better and happier men and
-women. But turning his back on the goodness, truth, and love whither he had
-induced us to believe he was leading us, the author flagrantly makes the
-woman contradict her whole nature in the last act; and, because her husband
-falls again, she, instead of raising him with all the tender mercies and
-humanities of wifehood, declares that her life has been one long mistake,
-and that she accepts the divorce which the Court had unjustly granted. The
-moral, if such a word may be applied to such a piece is this: "The law may
-be bad, but human nature is worse."'</p>
-
-<p>The other morning papers took the same view,&mdash;a great deal of talent
-wasted on a subject that could please no one. Hubert threw the papers
-aside, lay back, and in the lucid idleness of the bed his thoughts grew
-darker. It was hardly possible that the piece could survive such notices;
-and if it did not? Well, he would have to go. But until the piece was taken
-out of the bills it would be a weakness to harbour the ugly thought.</p>
-
-<p>There were, however, the evening papers to look forward to, and soon
-after midday Annie was sent to buy all that had appeared. Hubert expected
-to find in <a name="072.png" class="pb"></a> these papers a more delicate
-appreciation of his work. Many of the critics of the evening press were his
-personal friends, and nearly all were young men in full sympathy with the
-new school of dramatic thought. He read paper after paper with avidity; and
-Annie was sent in a cab to buy one that had not yet found its way so far
-north as Fitzroy Street. The opinion of this paper was of all importance,
-and Hubert tore it open with trembling fingers. Although more temperately
-written than the others, it was clearly favourable, and Hubert sighed a
-sweet sigh of relief. A weight was lifted from him; the world suddenly
-seemed to grow brighter; and he went to the theatre that evening, and, half
-doubting and half confidently, presented himself at the door of Montague
-Ford's dressing-room. The actor had not yet begun to dress, and was busy
-writing letters. He stretched his hand hurriedly to Hubert.</p>
-
-<p>'Excuse me, my dear fellow; I have a couple of letters to finish.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert sat down, glancing nervously from the actor to the morning papers
-with which the table was strewn. There was not an evening paper there. Had
-he not seen them? At the end of about ten minutes the actor said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<a name="073.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Well, this is a bad business; they are terribly down on us&mdash;aren't
-they? What do you think?'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you seen the evening papers&mdash;<i>The Telephone</i>, for
-instance?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, I've seen them all; but the evening papers don't amount to
-much. Stiggins's article was terrible. I am afraid he has killed the
-piece.'</p>
-
-<p>'Don't you think it will run, then?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, that depends upon the public, of course. If they like it, I'll
-keep it on.'</p>
-
-<p>'How's the booking?'</p>
-
-<p>'Not good.' Montague Ford moved his papers absent-mindedly. At the end
-of a long silence he said, 'Even if the piece did catch on, it would take a
-lot of working up to undo the mischief of those articles. Of course you can
-rely on me to give it every chance. I shan't take it out of the bills if I
-can possibly help.'</p>
-
-<p>'There is my <i>Gipsy</i>.'</p>
-
-<p>'I have another piece ready to put into rehearsal; it was arranged for
-six months ago. I only consented to produce your play because&mdash;well,
-because there has been such an outcry lately about art.... Tremendous part
-for me in the new piece... I'm sure you'll like it.'</p>
-
-<p>The business did improve, but so very slowly that <a name="074.png"
-class="pb"></a> Hubert was afraid Ford would lose patience and take the
-play out of the bills. But while the fate of the play hung in the balance,
-Hubert's life was being rendered unbearable by duns. They had found him
-out, one and all; to escape being served was an impossibility; and now his
-table was covered with summonses to appear at the County Court. This would
-not matter if the piece once took the public taste. Then he would be able
-to pay every one, and have some time to rest and think. And there seemed
-every prospect of its catching on. Discussions regarding the morality of
-the play had arisen in the newspapers, and the eternal question whether men
-and women are happier married or unmarried had reached its height. Hubert
-spent the afternoon addressing letters to the papers, striving to fan the
-flame of controversy. Every evening he listened for Rose's footstep on the
-stairs.&mdash;How did the piece go?&mdash;Was there a better house? Money or
-paper?&mdash;Have you seen the notice in the &mdash;&mdash;?&mdash;First-rate, wasn't it?&mdash;That
-ought to do some good.&mdash;I've heard there was a notice in the &mdash;&mdash;, but I
-haven't seen it. Have you?&mdash;No; but So-and-so saw the paper, and said there
-was nothing in it. And, do you know, I hear there's going to be a notice in
-<i>The Modern Review</i>, and that So-and-so is writing it.</p>
-
-<a name="075.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Every post brought newspapers; the room was filled with newspapers&mdash;all
-kinds of newspapers&mdash;papers one has never heard of,&mdash;French papers, Welsh
-papers, North of England papers, Scotch and Irish papers. Hubert read
-columns about himself, anecdotes of all kinds,&mdash;where he was born, who were
-his parents, and what first induced him to attempt writing for the stage;
-his personal appearance, mode of life, the cut of his clothes; his
-religious, moral, and political views. Had he been the plaintiff in an
-action for criminal libel, greater industry in the collection and the
-fabrication of personal details could hardly have been displayed.</p>
-
-<p>But at these articles Hubert only glanced; he was interested in his
-piece, not in himself, and when Annie brought up <i>The Modern Review</i>
-he tore it open, knowing he would find there criticism more fundamental,
-more searching. But as he read, the expression of hope which his face wore
-changed to one of pain pitiful to look upon. The article began with a
-sketch of the general situation, and in a tone of commiseration, of
-benevolent malice, the writer pointed out how inevitable it was that the
-critics should have taken Mr. Price, when <i>Divorce</i> was first
-produced, for the new dramatic genius they were waiting for. 'There comes a
-moment,' said this caustic writer, 'in the affairs of <a name="076.png"
-class="pb"></a> men when the new is not only eagerly accepted, but when it
-is confounded with the original. Wearied by the old stereotyped form of
-drama, the critics had been astonished by a novelty of subject, more
-apparent than real, and by certain surface qualities in the execution; they
-had hailed the work as being original both in form and in matter, whereas
-all that was good in the play had been borrowed from France and
-Scandinavia. <i>Divorce</i> was the inevitable product of the time. It had
-been written by Mr. Price, but it might have been written by a dozen other
-young men&mdash;granting intelligence, youth, leisure, a university education,
-and three or four years of London life&mdash;any one of a dozen clever young men
-who frequent West End drawing-rooms and dabble in literature might have
-written it. All that could be said was that the play was, or rather had
-been, <i>dans le mouvement</i>; and original work never is <i>dans le
-mouvement</i>. <i>Divorce</i> was nothing more than the product of certain
-surroundings, and remembering Mr. Price's other plays, there seemed to be
-no reason to believe that he would do better. Mr. Price had tried his hand
-at criticism, and that was a sure sign that the creative faculty had begun
-to wither. His critical essays were not rich nor abundant in thought, they
-were not the skirmishing of a man fighting for his <a name="077.png"
-class="pb"></a> ideas, they were not preliminary to a great battle; they
-were at once vague and pedantic, somewhat futile, <i>les &eacute;bats d'un esprit
-en peine</i>, and seemed to announce a talent in progress of disintegration
-rather than of reconstruction.</p>
-
-<p>'Sometimes the critic's phrases seemed wet with tears; sometimes,
-abandoning his tone of commiseration, he would assume one of scientific
-indifference. The phenomenon was the commonest. There were dozens of Hubert
-Prices in London. The universities and the newspapers, working singly and
-in collaboration, turned them out by the dozen. And the mission of these
-men of intelligent culture seemed to be to <i>poser des lapins sur la jeune
-presse</i>. Each one came in turn with his little volume of poems, his
-little play, his little picture; all were men of "advanced ideas"; in other
-words, they were all <i>dans le mouvement</i>. There was the rough Hubert
-Price, who made mild consternation in the drawing-room, and there was the
-sophisticated Hubert Price, who cajoled the drawing-room; there was the
-sincere and the insincere, and the Price that suffered and the Price that
-didn't. Each one brought a different <i>nuance</i>, a thousand
-infinitesimal variations of the type, but, considered merely in its
-relation to art, the species may be said to be divided <a name="078.png"
-class="pb"></a> into two distinct categories. In the first category are
-those who rise almost at the first bound to a certain level, who produce
-quickly, never reaching again the original standard, dropping a little
-lower at each successive effort until their work becomes indistinguishable
-from the ordinary artistic commercialism of the time. The fate of those in
-the second category is more pathetic; they gradually wither and die away
-like flowers planted in a thin soil. Among these men many noble souls are
-to be found, men who have surrendered all things for love of their art, and
-who seemed at starting to be the best equipped to win, but who failed,
-impossible to tell how or why. Sometimes their failure turns to comedy,
-sometimes to tragedy. They may become refined, delicate, elderly bachelors,
-the ornaments of drawing-rooms, professional diners-out&mdash;men with brilliant
-careers behind them. But if fate has not willed that they should retire
-into brilliant shells; if chance does not allow them to retreat, to
-separate themselves from their kind, but arbitrarily joins them to others,
-linking their fate to the fate of others' unhappiness, disaster may and
-must accrue from the alliance; honesty of purpose, trueness of heart, deep
-love, every great, good, and gracious quality to be found in nature, will
-not suffice to save them.'</p>
-
-<a name="079.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>The paper dropped from his hands, and he recollected all his
-failures.</p>
-
-<p>'Once I could do good work; now I can do neither good work nor bad. Were
-I a rich man, I should collect my scattered papers and write songs to be
-sung in drawing-rooms; but being a poor one, I must&mdash;I suppose I must get
-out. Positively, there is no hope,&mdash;debts on every side. Fate has willed me
-to go as went Haydon, Gerard de Nerval, and Mar&eacute;chal. The first cut his
-throat, the second hanged himself, and the third blew out his brains.
-Clearly the time has come to consider how I shall make my exit. It is a
-little startling to be called upon so peremptorily to go.'</p>
-
-<p>In this moment of extreme dejection it seemed to Hubert that the writer
-of the article had told him the exact truth. He refused to admit the plea
-of poverty. It was of course hard to write when one is being harassed by
-creditors. But if he had had it in him, it would have come out. The critic
-had very probably told him the truth. He could not hope to make a living
-out of literature. He had not the strength to write the masterpiece which
-the perverse cruelty of nature had permitted him only to see, and he was
-hopelessly unfit for journalism. But in his simple, wholesome mind there
-was no bent towards suicide; and he <a name="080.png" class="pb"></a>
-scanned every horizon. Once again he thought of his uncle. Five years ago
-he had written, asking him for the loan of a hundred pounds. He had
-received ten. And how vain it would be to write a second time! A few pounds
-would only serve to prolong his misery. No; he would not drift from
-degradation to degradation.</p>
-
-<p>He only glanced at the letter which Annie had brought up with the copy
-of <i>The Modern Review</i>. It was clearly a lawyer's letter. Should he
-open it? Why not spare himself the pain? He could alter nothing; and in
-these last days&mdash;&mdash; Leaving the thought unfinished, he sought for his keys;
-he went to his box, unlocked it, and took out a small paper package. Of the
-fifty pounds he had received from Ford about twenty remained: he had been
-poorer before, but hardly quite so hopeless. He scanned every horizon&mdash;all
-were barred. The thought of suicide, and with it the instinctive shrinking
-from it, came into his mind again. Suppose he took, that very night, an
-overdose of chloral? He tried to put the thought from him, and returned, a
-little dazed and helpless, to his chair. Had the critic in <i>The Modern
-Review</i> told him the truth? Was he incapable of earning a living? It
-seemed so. Above all, was he incapable of finishing <a name="081.png"
-class="pb"></a> <i>The Gipsy</i> as he intended? No; that he felt was a
-lie. Give him six months' quiet, free from worry and all anxiety, and he
-would do it. Many a year had passed since he had enjoyed a month of quiet;
-and glancing again at the letter on the table, he thought that perhaps at
-that very moment a score of gallery boys were hissing his play. Perhaps at
-that very moment Ford was making up his mind to announce the last six
-nights of <i>Divorce</i>. At a quarter to twelve he heard Rose's foot on
-the stairs. He opened the door.</p>
-
-<p>'How did the piece go to-night?'</p>
-
-<p>'Pretty well.'</p>
-
-<p>'Only pretty well? Won't you come in for a few minutes?... So the piece
-didn't go very well to-night?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, it did. I've seen it go better; but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Did you get a call?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, after the second act.'</p>
-
-<p>'Not after the third?'</p>
-
-<p>'No. That act never goes well. Harding came behind; I was speaking to
-him, and he said something which struck me as being very true. Ford, he
-said, plays the part a great deal too seriously. When the piece was first
-produced, it was played more good-humouredly <a name="082.png"
-class="pb"></a> by indifferent actors, who let the thing run without trying
-to bring out every point. Ford makes it as hard as nails. I think those
-were his exact words.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert did not answer. At the end of a long silence he said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Did you hear anything about the last night's?'</p>
-
-<p>'No,' she said; 'I heard nothing of that.'</p>
-
-<p>'Ford appeared quite satisfied then?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, quite,' she answered, with difficulty; for his eyes were fixed on
-her, and she felt he knew she was not telling the truth. The conversation
-paused again, and to turn it into another channel she said, 'Why, you have
-not opened your letter!'</p>
-
-<p>'I can see it is a lawyer's letter, on account of some unpaid bill. If I
-could pay it, I would; but as I can't&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'You are afraid to open it,' said Rose.</p>
-
-<p>Ashamed of his weakness, Hubert opened the letter, and began to read.
-Rose saw that the letter was not such an one as he had expected, and a
-moment after his face told her that fortunate news had come to him. The
-signs of the tumult within were represented by the passing of the hand
-across the brow, as if to brush aside some strange hallucination, and <a
-name="083.png" class="pb"></a> the sudden coming of a vague look of
-surprise and fear into the eyes. He said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Read it! Read it!'</p>
-
-<p>Relieved of much detail and much cumbersome legal circumlocution, it was
-to the following effect:&mdash;That about three months ago Mr. Burnett had come
-up from his place in Sussex, and at the offices of Messrs. Grandly &amp;
-Co. had made a will, in which he had disinherited his adopted daughter,
-Miss Emily Watson, and left everything to Mr. Hubert Price. There was no
-question as to the validity of the will; but Messrs. Grandly deemed it
-their duty to inform Mr. Hubert Price of the circumstances under which it
-had been made, and also of the fact that a few weeks before his death Mr.
-Burnett had told Mr. John Grandly, who was then staying with Mr. Burnett at
-Ashwood, that he intended adding a codicil, leaving some two or three
-hundred a year to Miss Watson. It was unfortunate that Mr. Burnett had not
-had time to do this; for Miss Watson was an orphan, eighteen years of age,
-and entirely unprovided for. Messrs. Grandly begged to submit these facts
-to the consideration of Mr. Hubert Price. Miss Watson was now residing at
-Ashwood. She was there with a friend of hers, Mrs. Bentley; and should Mr.
-Hubert Price <a name="084.png" class="pb"></a> feel inclined to do what Mr.
-Burnett had left undone, Messrs. Grandly would have very great pleasure in
-carrying his wishes into effect.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm not dreaming, am I?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, you are not. It is quite true. Your uncle has left his money to
-you. I am so glad; indeed I am. You will be able to finish your play, and
-take a theatre and produce it yourself if you like. I hope you won't forget
-me. I do want to play that part. You can't quite know what I shall do with
-it. One can't explain oneself in a scene here and there.... What are you
-thinking of?'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm thinking of that poor girl, Emily Watson. It comes very hard upon
-her.'</p>
-
-<p>'Who is she?'</p>
-
-<p>'The girl my uncle disinherited.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, she! Well, you can marry her if you like. That would not be a bad
-notion. But if you do, you'll forget all about me and Lady Hayward.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I shall never forget you, Rose.' He stretched his hand to her; but,
-irrespective of his will, the gesture seemed full of farewell.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm so much obliged to you,' he said; 'had it not been for you, I might
-never have opened that letter.'</p>
-
-<p>'Even if you hadn't, it wouldn't have mattered; you <a name="085.png"
-class="pb"></a> would have heard of your good fortune some other way. But
-it is getting very late. I must say good-night. I hope you will have a
-pleasant time in the country, and will finish your play. Good-night.'</p>
-
-<p>Returning from the door, he stopped to think. 'We have been very good
-friends&mdash;that is all. How strangely determined she is!... More so than I
-am. She is bound to succeed. There is in her just that note of individual
-passion.... Perhaps some one will find her out before I have
-finished,&mdash;that would be a pity. I wonder which of us will succeed
-first?'</p>
-
-<p>Then the madness of good fortune came upon him suddenly; he could think
-no more of Rose, and had to go for a long walk in the streets.</p>
-
-<a name="086.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>VII</h2>
-
-<p>'<span class="small-caps">Dearest</span> Emily, you must prepare
-yourself for the worst.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is he dead?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; he passed away quite quietly. To look at him one would say he was
-asleep; he does not appear to have suffered at all.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, Julia, Julia, do you think he forgave me? I could not do what he
-asked me.... I loved him very dearly as a father, but I could not have
-married him.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, dear, you could not. Such a marriage would have been most
-unnatural; he was more than forty years older than you.'</p>
-
-<p>'I do not think he ever thought of such a thing until about a month or
-six weeks ago. You remember how I ran to you? I was as white as a ghost,
-and I trembled like a leaf. I could hardly speak.... You remember?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, I remember; and some hours after, when I came into this room, he
-was standing there, just there, on the hearth-rug; there was a fearful look
-of pain and <a name="087.png" class="pb"></a> despair on his face&mdash;he
-looked as if he was going mad. I never saw such a look before, and I never
-wish to see such a look again. And the effort he made to appear unconcerned
-when he saw me was perhaps the worst part of it. I pretended to see
-nothing, and walked away towards the window and looked out. But all the
-while I could feel that some terrible drama was passing behind me. At last
-I had to look round. He was sitting in that chair, his elbows on his knees,
-clasping his head with both hands, the old, gnarled fingers twined in the
-iron-grey hair. Then, unable to contain himself any longer, he rushed out
-of the room, out of the house, and across the park.'</p>
-
-<p>'You say that he passed away quietly; he did not seem to suffer at
-all?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, he never recovered consciousness.'</p>
-
-<p>'But do you think that my refusal to marry him had anything to do with
-his death?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh no, Emily; a fit of apoplexy, with a man of his age, generally ends
-fatally.'</p>
-
-<p>'Even if I had known it all beforehand I don't think I could have acted
-differently. I could not have married him. Indeed I couldn't, Julia, not
-even if I knew I should save his life by doing so. I daresay it is very
-wicked of me, but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<a name="088.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Dearest Emily, you must not give way to such thoughts; you did quite
-right in refusing to marry Mr. Burnett. It was very wrong of him even to
-think of asking you, and if he had lived he would have seen how wrong it
-was of him to desire such a thing.'</p>
-
-<p>'If he had lived! But then he didn't live, not even long enough to
-forgive me, and when we think of how much he suffered&mdash;I don't mean in
-dying, you say he passed away quietly, but all this last month how
-heart-broken he looked! You remember when he sat at the head of the table,
-never speaking to us, and how frightened I was lest I should meet him on
-the stairs; I used to stand at the door of my room, afraid to move. I know
-he suffered, poor old man. I was very, very sorry for him. Indeed I was,
-Julia, for I'm not selfish, and when I think now that he died without
-forgiving me, I feel, I feel&mdash;oh, I feel as if I should like to die myself.
-Why do such things happen to me? I feel just as miserable now as I used to
-when I lived with father and mother, who could not agree. I have often told
-you how miserable I was then, but I don't think you ever quite understood.
-I feel just the same now, just as if I never wanted to see any one or
-anything again. I was so unhappy when I was a child, they thought I would
-die, and I should have died if I had <a name="089.png" class="pb"></a>
-remained listening to father and mother any longer. ... Every one thought I
-was so lucky when Mr. Burnett decided to adopt me and leave me all his
-money, and he has done that, poor old man, so I suppose I should be happy;
-but I'm not.'</p>
-
-<p>The girl's eyes turned instinctively towards the window and rested for a
-moment on the fair, green prospects of the park.</p>
-
-<p>'I hated to listen to father and mother quarrelling, but I loved them,
-and I had not been here a year before father died, and darling mother was
-not long following him&mdash;only six months. Then I had no one: a few distant
-relatives, whom I knew nothing of, whom I did not care for, so I gave all
-my love to Mr. Burnett. He was so good to me; he never denied me anything;
-he gave me everything, even you, dearest Julia. When he thought I wanted a
-companion, he found you for me. I learnt to love you. You became my best
-and dearest friend. Then things seemed to brighten up, and I thought I was
-happy, when all this dreadful trouble came upon us. Don't let's speak of it
-more than we can help. I often wished myself dead. Didn't you, Julia?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily Watson told the story of her misfortunes in a low, musical voice,
-heedless of two or three interruptions, <a name="090.png" class="pb"></a>
-hardly conscious of her listener, impressed and interested by the fatality
-of circumstances which she believed in design against her. She was a small,
-slender girl of about eighteen. Her abundant chestnut hair&mdash;exquisite,
-soft, and silky&mdash;was looped picturesquely, and fastened with a thin
-tortoiseshell comb. The tiny mouth trembled, and the large, prominent eyes
-reflected a strange, yearning soul. She was dressed in white muslin, and
-the fantastically small waist was confined with a white band. Her friend
-and companion, Julia Bentley, was a woman of about thirty, well above the
-medium height, full-bosomed and small-waisted. The type was Anglo-Saxon
-even to commonplace. The face was long, with a look of instinctive kindness
-upon it. She was given to staring, and as she looked at Emily, her blue
-eyes filled with an expression which told of a nature at once affectionate
-and intelligent. She was dressed in yellow linen, and wore a gold bracelet
-on a well-turned arm.</p>
-
-<p>The room was a long, old-fashioned drawing-room. It had three windows,
-and all three were filled with views of the park, now growing pale in the
-evening air. The flower-gardens were drawn symmetrically about the house
-and were set with blue flower-vases in which there were red geraniums. It
-was a very <a name="091.png" class="pb"></a> large room, nearly forty feet
-long, with old portraits on the walls&mdash;ugly things and ill done; and where
-there were no portraits the walls were decorated with vine leaves and
-mountains. The parqueted floor was partially covered with skins, and the
-furniture seemed to have known many a generation; some of it was heavy and
-cumbersome, some of it was modern. There was a grand piano, and above it
-two full-length portraits&mdash;a lady in a blue dress and a man in black velvet
-knee-breeches. At the end of a long silence, Emily suddenly threw herself
-weeping into Julia's arms.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, you are my only friend; you will not leave me now.... We shall
-always love one another, shall we not? If anything ever came between us it
-would kill me.... That poor old man lying dead up-stairs! He loved me very
-dearly, and I loved him, too. Yet I said just now I could not have married
-him even if I had known it would save his life. I was wrong; yes, I would
-have married him if I had known.... You don't believe me?'</p>
-
-<p>'My dearest girl, you must try to forget that Mr. Burnett ever
-entertained so foolish a thought. He was a very good man, and loved you for
-a long time as he should have loved you&mdash;as a daughter. We shall <a
-name="092.png" class="pb"></a> respect his memory best by forgetting the
-events of the last six weeks. And now, Emily, dinner will be ready at seven
-o'clock, and it is now six. What are you going to do?'</p>
-
-<p>'I shall go out for a little walk. I shall go down and see the
-swans.'</p>
-
-<p>'Shall I come with you?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, thank you, dear; I think I'd sooner be alone. I want to think.'</p>
-
-<p>Julia looked a moment anxiously at this fragile girl, whose tiny head
-was poised on a long, delicate neck like a fruit on its stem.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, go for a walk, dear,' said Julia; 'it will do you good. Shall I go
-and fetch your hat and jacket?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, thank you, I will not trouble you; I'll go myself.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, Emily, I think you had better let me go.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, no; I am not afraid.'</p>
-
-<p>And she went up the wide oak staircase, thinking of the man who lay dead
-in the room at the end of the passage. She was conscious of a sense of
-dread; the house seemed to wear a strange air, and her dog, Dandy, was
-conscious of it, too; he was more silent, less joyful than usual. And when
-she came from her room, dressed to go out, instead of rushing down-stairs,
-<a name="093.png" class="pb"></a> barking with joy, he dropped his tail and
-lingered at the end of the passage. She called him; he still hesitated, and
-then, yielding to a sudden desire, she went down the passage and knocked at
-the door of the room. The nurse answered her knock.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, don't come in, miss.'</p>
-
-<p>'Why not? I want to see him before he goes away for ever.'</p>
-
-<p>Upon the limp, white curtains of an old four-posted bed she saw the
-memorable profile&mdash;stern, unrelenting. How still he lay! Never would that
-face speak or laugh or see again. Although sixty-five, his head was covered
-with short, thick, iron-grey hair; the beard, too, was short and thick, and
-iron-grey. The face was rugged, and when Emily touched the coarse hand,
-telling of a life of toil, she started&mdash;it was singularly cold. Fear and
-sorrow in like measure choked her, and her soul awoke, and tremblingly she
-walked out of the house, glad to breathe the sweet evening air.</p>
-
-<p>She walked towards the artificial water. The sky was melancholy and
-grey, and the park lay before her, hushed and soundless. Through the
-shadows of the darkening island two swans floated softly, leaving behind
-slight silver lines; above, the swallows flew high in the evening. There
-was sensation of death, <a name="094.png" class="pb"></a> too, in this
-cold, mournful water, and in the silence that hung about it, and in some
-vague way it reminded Emily of her own life. She had known little else but
-death; her life seemed full of death; and those reflections, so distinct
-and so colourless, were like death.</p>
-
-<p>Then, in a sudden expansion of youth she wondered. Her own life, how
-strange, how personal, how intense! What did it mean, what meaning had it
-in the great, wide world? And the impressive tranquillity, the pale death
-of the day, lying like a flower on the water, seemed to symbolise her
-thought, and she felt more distinctly than she had ever done before. And
-there arose in her a nervous and passionate interest in herself. She seemed
-so strange, so wonderful. Her childhood was in itself an enigma. That sad
-and sorrowful childhood of hers, passed in that old London house; her
-mother's love for her; her cruel, stern stepfather, and the endless
-quarrels between her father and mother, which made her young life so
-unbearable, so wretched, that she could never think of those years without
-tears rising to her eyes. And then the going away, coming to live with Mr.
-Burnett! The death of her father and her dear mother, so sudden, following
-so soon one after the other. How much there had been <a name="095.png"
-class="pb"></a> in her life, how wonderful it was! Her love of Mr. Burnett,
-and then that bitter and passionate change in him! That proposal of
-marriage; could she ever forget it? And then this cruel and sudden death.
-Everything she had ever loved had been taken from her. Only Julia remained,
-and should Julia be taken from her, she felt that she must die. But that
-would not, could not, happen. She was now mistress of Ashwood, she was a
-great heiress; and she and Julia would live always together, they would
-always love one another, they would always live here in this beautiful
-place which they loved so well.</p>
-
-<a name="096.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>VIII</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">There</span> were at the funeral a few personal
-friends who lived in the neighbourhood, the farmers on the estate, and the
-labourers; and when the little crowd separated outside the church, Emily
-and Julia walked back to Ashwood with Mr. Grandly, Mr. Burnett's intimate
-friend and solicitor. They returned through the park, hardly speaking at
-all, Emily absent-minded as usual, waving her parasol occasionally at a
-passing butterfly. The grass was warm and beautiful to look on, and they
-lingered, prolonging the walk. It was very good of Mr. Grandly to accompany
-them back; he might have gone on straight to the station, so Julia thought,
-and she was surprised indeed when, instead of bidding them good-bye at the
-front door, he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Before I return to London I have a communication to make to both you
-ladies. Will it suit you to come into the drawing-room with me?'</p>
-
-<p>'Perfectly, so far as I'm concerned; and you, Emily?'</p>
-
-<a name="097.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Oh, I've nothing to do; but if it is about business, Julia will
-attend&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I think you had better be present, Miss Watson.'</p>
-
-<p>Mr. Grandly was a tall, massive man with benevolent features; his bald,
-pink skull was partly covered with one lock of white hair. There was an
-anxious look in his pale, deep-set eyes which impressed Julia, and she
-said: 'I hope this communication you have to make to us is not of a painful
-nature. We have&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, Mrs. Bentley, I know that you have been severely tried lately, but
-there is no help for it. I cannot keep you in ignorance any longer of
-certain facts relating to Mr. Burnett's will.' The words 'will' and 'facts'
-struck on Emily's ear. She had been thinking about her fortune. The very
-ground she was walking on was hers. She was the owner of this beautiful
-park; it seemed like a fairy tale. And that house, that dear, old-fashioned
-house, that rambling, funny old place of all sizes and shapes, full of deep
-staircases and pictures, was hers. Her eyes wandered along the smooth wide
-drive, down to the placid water crossed by the great ornamental bridge, the
-island where she had watched the swans floating last night&mdash;all these
-things were hers. So the words 'will' and 'facts' and 'ignorance of them'
-jarred her clutching <a name="098.png" class="pb"></a> little dream, and
-she turned her eyes&mdash;they wore an anxious look&mdash;towards Mr. Grandly, and
-said with an authoritative air: 'Yes, let us go into the drawing-room; I
-want to hear what Mr. Grandly has to say about&mdash;&mdash;Let us go into the
-drawing-room at once.'</p>
-
-<p>Julia took the chair nearest to her. Emily stood at the window, waiting
-impatiently for Mr. Grandly to begin. He laid his hat on the parquet, wiped
-his forehead with his handkerchief, and drew an arm-chair forward. 'Mr.
-Burnett, as you know, made a will some years ago, in favour of his cousin
-and adopted daughter, Miss Emily Watson. In that will he left his entire
-fortune to her, Ashwood Park and all his invested money. No other person
-was mentioned in that will, except Miss Watson. It was I who drew up this
-will. I remember discussing its provisions with Mr. Burnett, and advising
-him to leave something, even if it were only a few hundred pounds, to his
-nephew, Hubert Price. But Mr. Burnett was always a very headstrong man; he
-had quarrelled with this young man, as he said, irreparably, and could not
-be induced to leave him even a hundred pounds. I thought this was harsh,
-and as Mr. Burnett's friend I told him so&mdash;I have always been opposed to
-extreme measures,&mdash;but he was not to be gainsaid. So the matter remained
-for many <a name="099.png" class="pb"></a> years; never did Mr. Burnett
-mention his nephew's name. I thought he had forgotten the young man's
-existence, when, suddenly, without warning, Mr. Burnett came into my office
-and told me that he intended to alter his will, leaving all his property to
-his nephew, Hubert Price. You know what old friends we were, and, presuming
-on our friendship, I told him what I thought of his project of
-disinheritance, for it amounted to that. Well, suffice it to say, we very
-nearly quarrelled over the matter. I refused to draw up the will, so
-iniquitous did it seem to me. He said: "Very well, Grandly, I'll go
-elsewhere." Then I remembered that if I allowed him to go elsewhere I
-should lose all hold over him, and I consented to draw up the will.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily listened, a vague expression of pain in her pathetic eyes. Then
-this house, this room where she was sitting, was not hers, and a strange
-man would come soon and drive her away!</p>
-
-<p>'And he has left Ashwood to Mr. Price, is not that his name?' she said,
-abruptly.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; he has left Ashwood to Mr. Price.'</p>
-
-<p>'And when did he make this new will?'</p>
-
-<p>'I think it is just about a month ago.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily leaned forward, and her great eyes, full of light and sorrow, were
-fixed in space, her little pale <a name="100.png" class="pb"></a> hands
-linked, and the great mass of chestnut hair slipping from the comb. She
-was, in truth, at that moment the subject of a striking picture, and she
-was even more impressive when she said, speaking slowly: 'Then that old man
-was even wickeder than I thought. Oh, what I have learned in the last three
-or four weeks! Oh, what wickedness, what wickedness!... But go on,' she
-said, looking at Mr. Grandly; 'tell me all.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose there was some very serious reason, but on that point Mr.
-Burnett absolutely refused to answer me. He said his reasons were his own,
-and that he intended to leave his money to whom he pleased.'</p>
-
-<p>'There was&mdash;&mdash;' Julia stopped short, and looked interrogatively at
-Emily.</p>
-
-<p>'Go on, Julia, tell him; we have nothing to conceal.'</p>
-
-<p>'Mr. Burnett asked Emily to marry him a short time ago; she, of course,
-refused, and ever since he seemed more like&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'A madman than anything else,' broke in Emily. 'Oh, for the last month
-we have led a miserable life! It was a happy release.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is it possible,' said Mr. Grandly, 'that Mr. Burnett seriously
-contemplated marriage with Miss Watson?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, and her refusal seemed to drive him out of his mind.'</p>
-
-<a name="101.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I never was more surprised.' The placid face of the eminently
-respectable solicitor lapsed into contemplation. 'I often tried,' he said,
-suddenly, 'to divine the reason why he changed his will. Disappointed love
-seemed the only conceivable reason, but I rejected it as being quite
-inconceivable. Well, it only shows how little we know what is passing in
-each other's minds.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then,' said Julia, 'Mr. Burnett has divided his fortune, leaving
-Ashwood to Mr. Price, and all his invested money to Emily?'</p>
-
-<p>A look of pain passed over Mr. Grandly's benevolent face, and he
-answered: 'Unfortunately he has left everything to Mr. Price.'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm glad,' exclaimed Emily, 'that he has left me nothing. Once he
-thought fit to disinherit me because I would not marry him, I prefer not to
-have anything to do with his money.'</p>
-
-<p>Mr. Grandly and Julia looked at each other; they did not need to speak;
-each knew that the girl did not realise at once the full and irretrievable
-nature of this misfortune. The word 'destitute' was at present unrealised,
-and she only thought that she had been deprived of what she loved best in
-the world&mdash;Ashwood. Mr. Grandly glanced at her, and then speaking a little
-more hurriedly, said&mdash;</p>
-
-<a name="102.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I was saying just now that I only consented to draw up the will so that
-I might be able at some future time to induce Mr. Burnett to add a codicil
-to it. Later on I spoke to him again on the subject, and he promised to
-consider it, and a few days after he wrote to me, saying that he had
-decided to take my advice and add a codicil. Subsequently, in another
-letter he mentioned three hundred a year as being the sum he thought he
-would be in honour bound to leave Miss Watson. Unfortunately, he did not
-live long enough to carry this intention into execution. But the letters he
-addressed to me on the subject exist, and I have every hope that the heir,
-Mr. Price, will be glad to make some provision for his cousin.'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you any reason for thinking that Mr. Price will do so?' said
-Julia.</p>
-
-<p>'No. But it seems impossible for any honourable man to act
-otherwise.'</p>
-
-<p>'He cannot bear enmity against Emily, who of course knew nothing of his
-quarrel with his uncle. Do you know anything about Mr. Price? What is he?
-Where does he live?'</p>
-
-<p>'He is a literary man, I believe. I have heard that he writes
-plays!'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, a writer of plays.'</p>
-
-<a name="103.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Yes. I am glad of it; he may be easier to deal with. I daresay it is a
-mistaken notion, but one is apt to imagine that these artist folk are more
-generous with their money than ordinary mortals.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is he married?' said Julia, and involuntarily she glanced toward
-Emily.</p>
-
-<p>Mr. Grandly, too, looked toward the girl, and then he said: 'I don't
-know if Mr. Price is married; I hope not.'</p>
-
-<p>'Why do you hope so?' said Emily, suddenly.</p>
-
-<p>'Because if he isn't, there will only be one person to deal with. If he
-had a wife, she would have a voice in the matter; and in such circumstances
-as ours a man is easier to deal with. I earnestly hope Mr. Hubert Price is
-not married, and shall consider it a great point in our favour if on
-returning to town I find he is not.' Then assuming a lighter tone, for the
-nervous strain of the last ten minutes had been intense, he said: 'If he is
-not married, who knows&mdash;you may take a fancy to him, and he to you; then
-things would be just the same as before&mdash;only better.'</p>
-
-<p>'I should not marry him&mdash;I hate him already. I wonder how you can think
-of such a thing, Mr. Grandly? You know that he must be a very wicked man
-for uncle to have disinherited him. I have always heard that<a
-name="104.png" class="pb"></a>&mdash;but I don't know what I am saying.' Tears
-welled up into her eyes. 'I daresay my cousin is not so bad as&mdash;but I can
-talk no more.... I am very miserable, I have always been miserable, and I
-don't know why; I never did harm to any one.'</p>
-
-<p>Soon after Mr. Grandly bade the ladies good-bye. Julia followed him to
-the front door. 'You will do all you can to help us? That poor child is too
-young, too inexperienced, to realise what her position is.'</p>
-
-<p>'I know, I know,' said Mr. Grandly, extending both hands to Julia; 'in
-the whole course of my experience I never met with a sadder case. But we
-must not take too sad a view of it. Perhaps all will come right in the end.
-The young man cannot refuse to make good his uncle's intentions. He cannot
-see his cousin go to the workhouse. I will do the best I can for you. The
-moment I get back to London, I'll set inquiries on foot and find out his
-address, and when I have seen him I'll write. Good-bye.'</p>
-
-<p>Then, resolving that it were better to leave the girl to herself, Julia
-took up her key-basket and hurried away on household business. But in the
-middle of her many occupations she would now and then stop short to think.
-She had never heard of anything so cruel before. That poor girl&mdash;she must
-go to her; she must <a name="105.png" class="pb"></a> not leave her alone
-any longer. But it would be well to avoid the subject as much as possible.
-She must think of something to distract her thoughts. The pony-chaise. It
-might be the last time they had a carriage to go out in. But they could not
-go out driving on the day of the funeral.</p>
-
-<p>That evening, as they were going to bed, Emily said, lifting her sweet,
-pathetic little face, looking all love and gentleness: 'Oh, to think of a
-common, vulgar writer coming here, with a common, vulgar wife and a horrid
-crowd of children. Oh, Julia, doesn't it seem impossible? And yet I suppose
-it is true. I cannot bear to think of it. I can see the horrid children
-tramping up and down the stairs, breaking the things we have known and
-loved so long; and they will destroy all my flowers, and no one will
-remember to feed the poor swans. Dandy, my beloved, I shall be able to take
-you with me.' And she caught up the rough-haired terrier and hugged him,
-kissing his dear old head. 'Dandy is mine; they can't take him from me, can
-they? But do you think the swans belong to them or to us? I suppose it
-would be impossible to take them with us if we go to live in London. They
-couldn't live in a backyard.'</p>
-
-<p>'But, dearest Emily, who are "they"? You don't <a name="106.png"
-class="pb"></a> know that he is married&mdash;literary men don't often marry.
-For all you know, he is a handsome young man, who will fall madly in love
-with you.'</p>
-
-<p>'No one ever fell in love with me except that horrid old man&mdash;how I hate
-him, how I detest to think of it! I thought I should have died when he
-asked to marry me. The very memory of it is enough to make me hate all men,
-and prevent me from liking any one. I don't think I could like him; I
-should always see that wicked old man's hoary, wrinkled face in his.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, Emily, I cannot think how such ideas can come into your head. It is
-not right, indeed it isn't.' And this simple Englishwoman looked at this
-sensitive girl in sheer wonderment and alarm.</p>
-
-<p>'I only say what I think. I am glad the old man did disinherit me. I'm
-glad we are leaving Ashwood; I cannot abide the place when I think of
-him.... There, that is his chair. I can see him sitting in it now. He is
-grinning at us; he is saying, "Ha! ha! I have made beggars of you both."
-You remember how we used to tremble when we met his terrible old face on
-the stairs; you remember how he used to sit glaring at us all through
-dinner?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, Emily, I remember all that; but I do not think it natural that you
-should forget all the years of <a name="107.png" class="pb"></a> kindness;
-he was very good to you, and loved you very much, and if he forgot himself
-at the end of his life, we must remember the weakness of age.'</p>
-
-<p>'The hideousness of age,' Emily replied, in a low tone. The conversation
-paused, and then Julia said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'You are speaking wildly, Emily, and will live to regret your words. Let
-us speak no more of Mr. Burnett... I daresay you will find your cousin a
-charming young man. I should laugh if it were all to end in a marriage. And
-how glad I should be to see you off on your honeymoon, to bid you
-good-bye!'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, Julia, don't speak like that; you will never bid me good-bye. You
-will never leave me&mdash;promise me that&mdash;you are my only friend. Oh, Julia,
-promise me that you will never leave me.'</p>
-
-<p>Tears rose in Julia's eyes, and taking the girl in her arms, she said,
-'I'll never leave you, my dear girl, until you yourself wish it.'</p>
-
-<p>'I wish it? Oh, Julia, you do not know me. I have lost everything,
-Julia, but I mustn't lose you... After all, it doesn't so much matter, so
-long as we are not separated. I don't care about money, and we can have a
-nice little house in London all to ourselves. And if we get too hard up,
-we'll both go out as daily governesses. I think I could teach a little
-music, to <a name="108.png" class="pb"></a> young children, you know; you'd
-teach the older ones.' Emily looked at Julia inquiringly, and going over to
-the piano, attempted to play her favourite polka. Julia, who had once
-worked for her daily bread, and earned it in a sort of way by giving
-music-lessons, smiled sadly at the girl's ignorance of life.</p>
-
-<p>'I see,' said Emily, who was quick to divine every shade of sentiment
-passing in the minds of those she loved; 'you don't think I could teach
-even the little children.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I hope it will never come to your having to try.'</p>
-
-<p>'I must do something to get a living,' she replied, looking vaguely and
-wistfully into the fire. 'How unfortunate all this is&mdash;that horrid, horrid
-old man. But supposing he had asked you to marry him&mdash;he wasn't nice, but
-you are older than I, and if you had married him you would have become, in
-a way, my stepmother. But what a charming stepmother! Oh, how I should have
-loved that!'</p>
-
-<p>'Come, Emily, it is time to go to bed; you let your imagination run away
-with you.'</p>
-
-<p>'Julia, you are not cross because&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'No, dear, I'm not cross. I'm only a little tired. We have talked too
-long.'</p>
-
-<a name="109.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Emily's allusion to music-teaching had revived in Julia all her most
-painful memories. If this man were to cast them penniless out of Ashwood!
-Supposing, supposing that were to happen? Starving days, pale and haggard,
-rose up in her memory. What should she do, what should she do, and with
-that motherless girl dependent on her for food and clothes and shelter? She
-buried her face in the pillow and prayed that she might be saved from such
-a destiny.</p>
-
-<p>If this man&mdash;this unknown creature&mdash;were to refuse to help them, she and
-Emily would have to go to London, and she would have to support Emily as
-best she might. She would hold to her and fight for her with all her
-strength, but would she not fall vanquished in the fight; and then, and
-then? The same thoughts, questions, and fears turned in her head like a
-wheel, and it was not until dawn had begun to whiten the window-panes that
-she fell asleep.</p>
-
-<p>A few days after, the post brought a letter for Julia. After glancing
-hastily down the page she said: 'This is a letter from Mr. Grandly, and it
-is good news. Oh, what a relief!...'</p>
-
-<p>'Read it.'</p>
-
-<blockquote> <p>'"<span class="small-caps">Dear Mrs. Bentley</span>,&mdash;Immediately I arrived in London, I set to work to find
-out Mr. Price's address. It <a name="110.png" class="pb"></a> was the
-easiest matter in the world, for he has a play now running at one of the
-theatres. So I directed my letter to the theatre, and next morning I had a
-visit from him. After explaining to him the resources of the brilliant
-fortune he had come into, I told him of his uncle's intention to add a
-codicil to his will, leaving Miss Watson three hundred a year; I told him
-that this last will had left her entirely unprovided for. He said, at once,
-that he fully agreed with me, and that he would consider what was the most
-honourable course for him to take in regard to his 'cousin. This is exactly
-what he said, but his manner was such that before leaving he left no doubt
-in my mind whatever that he will act very generously indeed. I should not
-be surprised if he settled even more than the proposed three hundred a year
-on Miss Watson. He is a very quiet, thoughtful young man of about two or
-three and thirty. He looks poor, and I fancy he has lived through very hard
-times. He wears an air of sadness and disappointment which makes him
-attractive, and his manners are gentle and refined. I tell you these
-things, for I know they will interest you. I have not been able to find out
-if he is married, but I am sorry to say that his play has not succeeded. I
-should have found out more, but he was not in my office above ten minutes;
-he had to hurry away to keep an appointment at the theatre, for, as he
-explained, it was to be decided that very day if the play was to be taken
-out of the bills at the end of the week. He promised to call again, and our
-interview is fixed for eleven o'clock the day after to-morrow. In the
-meantime take heart, for I think I am justified in telling you I feel quite
-sanguine as to the result."'</p> </blockquote>
-
-<a name="111.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Well,' said Julia, laying down the letter, 'I don't think that anything
-could be more satisfactory, and just fancy dear old Mr. Grandly being able
-to describe a young man as well as that.'</p>
-
-<p>'He doesn't say if he is short or tall, or dark or fair.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, he doesn't. I think he might have told us something about his
-personal appearance, but it is a great relief to hear that he is not the
-vulgar Bohemian we have always understood him to be. Mr. Grandly says his
-manners are refined; you might take a fancy to him after all.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you don't know that he isn't married. I suppose Mr. Grandly wasn't
-able to find that out. I should like to know&mdash;but not because I want to
-marry him or any one else; only I don't like the idea of a great, vulgar
-woman, and a pack of children scampering about the place when we go.'</p>
-
-<p>'Do you dislike children so much, then, Emily?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't know that I ever thought about them; but I'm sure I shouldn't
-like his children. I dreamt of him last night. Do you believe in
-dreams?'</p>
-
-<p>'What did you dream?'</p>
-
-<p>'I cannot remember, but I woke up crying, feeling more unhappy than I
-ever felt in my life before. It is <a name="112.png" class="pb"></a>
-curious that I should dream of him last night, and that you should receive
-that letter this morning, isn't it?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't see anything strange in it. Nothing more natural than that you
-should dream about him, and it was certain that I should receive a letter
-from Mr. Grandly; he promised to write to me in a few days.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then you believe what is in that letter&mdash;I don't. Something tells me
-that he will not act kindly, but I don't know how.'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm quite sure you are wrong, Emily. Mr. Grandly would never have
-written this letter unless he knew for certain that Mr. Price would do all
-or more than he promised.'</p>
-
-<p>'I can't see from the letter that he has promised anything... Even if he
-does give me three hundred a year, I shall have to leave Ashwood.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I'm cross with you: of course, if you will insist on
-always looking at the melancholy side.... Now I'm going; I've to see after
-the housekeeping. Are you going into the garden?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, presently.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not seem to know what she was going to do. She looked out of
-the window, she lingered in the corridor; finally she wandered into the
-library. The <a name="113.png" class="pb"></a> quaint, old-fashioned room
-recalled her childhood to her. It was here she used to learn her lessons.
-Here was the mahogany table, at which she used to sit with her governess,
-learning to read and write; and there, far away at the other end of the
-long room, was the round table, where lay the old illustrated editions of
-<i>Gulliver's Travels</i> and <i>The Arabian Nights</i>, which she used to
-run to whenever her governess left the room. And at the bottom of the
-book-cases there were drawers full of strange papers; these drawers she
-used to open in fear and trembling, so mysterious did they seem to her. And
-there was the book-cases full of the tall folios, behind which lay, in dark
-and dim recesses, stores of books which she used to pull out, expecting at
-every moment to come upon long-forgotten treasures. She smiled now, as she
-recalled these childish imaginings, and lifting tenderly the coarse
-drugget, she looked at the great green globe which her fingers used to turn
-in infantile curiosity.</p>
-
-<p>Then leaving the library, she roamed through the house, pausing on the
-first landing to gaze on the picture of the fine gentleman in a red coat,
-his hand for ever on his sword. She remembered how she used to wonder whom
-he was going to kill, and how sure she used to feel that at last he would
-grant his adversary <a name="114.png" class="pb"></a> his life. And close
-by was the picture of the wind-mill, set on the edge of the down, with the
-shepherd driving sheep in the foreground. Her whole life seemed drenched
-with tears at the thought of parting with these things. Every room was full
-of memories for her. She was a little girl when she came to live at
-Ashwood, and the room at the top of the stairs had been her nursery. There
-were the two beds; both were now dismantled and bare. It was in the little
-bed in the corner that she used to sleep; it was in the old four-poster
-that her nurse slept. And there was the very place, in front of the fire,
-where she used to have her tea. The table had disappeared, and the grate,
-how rusty it was! In the far corner, by the window, there used to be a
-press, in which nurse kept tea and sugar. That press had been removed. The
-other press was there still, and throwing open the doors she surveyed the
-shelves. She remembered the very peg on which her hat and jacket used to
-hang. And the long walks in the great park, which was to her, then, a world
-of wonderment!</p>
-
-<p>She wandered about the old corridor, in and out of odd rooms, all
-associated with her childhood&mdash;quaint old rooms, many of them lumber rooms,
-full of odd corners and old cupboards, the meaning of which she <a
-name="115.png" class="pb"></a> used to strive to divine. How their silence
-and mystery used to thrill her little soul! Faded rooms whose mystery had
-departed, but whose gloom was haunted with tenderest recollections. In one
-corner was the reading-chair in which Mr. Burnett used to sit. At that time
-she used to sit on his knee, and when the chair gave way beneath their
-weight, he had said she was too big a girl to sit on his knee any longer.
-The words had seemed to her a little cruel. She had forgotten the old
-chair, but now she remembered the very moment when the servants came to
-take it away.</p>
-
-<p>Under the window were some fragments of a china bowl which she had
-broken when quite a little child. There was a hoop-stick and the hoop which
-had been taken down to the blacksmith's to be mended. He had mended it, but
-she did not remember ever using it again. And there was an old box of
-water-colours, with which she used to colour all the uncoloured drawings in
-her picture-books. Emily took the hoop-stick, the old doll, and the broken
-box of water-colours, and packed them away carefully. She would be able to
-find room for them in the little house in London where she and Julia were
-going to live.</p>
-
-<p>A few days after, the post brought letters from Mr. <a name="116.png"
-class="pb"></a> Grandly, one for Emily and one for Julia. Julia's letter
-ran as follows:</p>
-
-<blockquote>
-
-<p>'<span class="small-caps">Dear Mrs. Bentley</span>,&mdash;-I write by this
-post to Miss Watson, advising her that her cousin, Mr. Price, is most
-anxious to make her acquaintance, and asking her to send the dog-cart
-to-morrow to meet him at the station. I must take upon myself the
-responsibility for this step. I have seen Mr. Price again, and he has
-confirmed me in my good opinion of him. He seems most anxious, not only to
-do everything right, but to make matters as pleasant and agreeable as
-possible for his cousin. He has written me a letter recognising Miss
-Watson's claim upon him, and constituting himself her trustee. I have not
-had yet time to prepare a deed of gift, but there can be little doubt that
-Miss Watson's position is now quite secure. So far so good; but more than
-ever does the only clear and satisfactory way out of this miserable
-business seem to me to be a marriage between Mr. Hubert Price and Miss
-Watson. I have already told you that he is a nice, refined young man, of
-gentlemanly bearing, good presence, and excellent speech, though a trifle
-shy and reserved; and, as I have since discovered that he is not married, I
-have taken upon myself the responsibility of advising him to jump into a
-train and to go and tell his cousin the conclusion he has come to regarding
-the will of the late Mr. Burnett. As I have said, he is a shy man, and it
-was some time before I could induce him to take so decisive a step; he
-wanted to meet Miss Watson in my office, but I succeeded in persuading him.
-He will go down to you to-morrow by the five o'clock, and I need not
-impress upon <a name="117.png" class="pb"></a> you the necessity that you
-should use your influence with Miss Watson, and that his reception should
-be as cordial as circumstances permit. I have only to add that I see no
-need that you should show this letter to Miss Watson, for the very fact of
-knowing that we desired to bring about a marriage might prejudice her
-against this young man, whom she otherwise cannot fail to find
-charming.'</p> </blockquote>
-
-<p>Hearing some one at her door, Julia put the letter away. It was
-Emily.</p>
-
-<p>'I've just received a letter from Mr. Grandly, saying that that man is
-coming here to-day, and that we are to send the dog-cart for him.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is not that the very best thing that&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'We cannot remain here, we must leave a note for him, or something of
-that kind. I wouldn't remain here to meet him for worlds. I really
-couldn't, Julia.'</p>
-
-<p>'And why not, Emily?'</p>
-
-<p>'To meet the man who is coming to turn me out of Ashwood!'</p>
-
-<p>'How do you know that he is coming to turn you out of Ashwood? You
-imagine these things.... Do you suppose that Mr. Grandly would send him
-down here if he did not know what his intentions were?'</p>
-
-<p>'But we shall have to leave Ashwood.'</p>
-
-<p>'Very likely, but not in the way you imagine. Remember, <a
-name="118.png" class="pb"></a> Mr. Price is your cousin; you may like him
-very much. Let's be guided by Mr. Grandly; I have not seen your letter, but
-apparently he advises us to remain here and receive him.'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't think I can, Julia. I have misgivings.'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you been dreaming again?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I've not been dreaming, but I have misgivings.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are a silly little goose, Emily. Come and give me a kiss, and
-promise to take my advice.'</p>
-
-<p>'Dearest Julia, you do love me, don't you? Promise me that we shall not
-be separated, and then I don't mind.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, dear, I promise you that, and you will promise me to try to like
-your cousin?'</p>
-
-<p>'I'll try, Julia, but I'm awfully frightened, and&mdash;I don't think I could
-like him, no matter what he was like. I feel a sort of hatred in my heart.
-Don't you know what I mean?' And the girl looked questioningly into her
-friend's eyes.</p>
-
-<a name="119.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>IX</h2>
-
-<p>'<span class="small-caps">I am</span> Miss Watson,' she said in her low
-musical voice, 'and this is my friend, Mrs. Bentley.' Hubert bowed, and
-sought for words. He found none, and the irritating silence was broken
-again by Miss Watson. 'Won't you sit down?' she said.</p>
-
-<p>'Thank you.' He pulled off his gloves. The pained, troubled look which
-he had met in Miss Watson's face seemed a reproach, and he regretted not
-having followed his own idea, and invited the young lady to meet him at Mr.
-Grandly's office. He glanced nervously from one lady to the other.</p>
-
-<p>'I hope you have had a pleasant journey, Mr. Price,' said Mrs. Bentley.
-'The country is looking very beautiful just at present. Do you know this
-part of the country?' Mrs. Bentley's words were very welcome, and Hubert
-replied eagerly&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'No; I do not know the country at all well. I have been very little out
-of London for some years, but I hope now to see more of the country. This
-is a beautiful place.'</p>
-
-<a name="120.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>At that moment he met Mrs. Bentley's eyes, and, feeling that he was
-touching on delicate ground, he stopped speaking. When he turned his head,
-he met Miss Watson's great sad eyes, which seemed to absorb the entire
-face, fixed upon him. They expressed such depth of pathetic appeal that he
-trembled with apprehension, and the instinct in him was to beg for pardon.
-But it became suddenly necessary to say something, and, speaking at random,
-his head full of whirling words, he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Of course nothing could be more sad than my poor uncle's death,&mdash;so
-unexpected... Having lived so long together, you must have&mdash;&mdash;' Then it was
-Hubert's turn to look appealingly at Miss Watson; but her great eyes seemed
-to say, 'Go on, go on; heap cruelty on cruelty!' Then he plunged
-desperately, hoping to retrieve his mistakes. 'He died about a month ago.
-Mr. Grandly told me I should still find you here, so I thought&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>The intensity of his emotion perhaps caused Hubert to accentuate his
-words, so that they conveyed a meaning different from that which he
-intended. Certainly his hesitations were capable of misinterpretation, and
-Miss Watson said, her voice trembling,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Of course we know we have no right here, we are <a name="121.png"
-class="pb"></a> intruding; but we are making preparations.... I daresay
-that to-morrow we shall be able to&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, I beg pardon, Miss Watson; let me assure you ... I am sorry
-if&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>Taking a little handkerchief out of her black dress, Emily covered her
-face in her thin, tiny hands. She sobbed aloud, and ran out of the room.
-Hubert turned to Mrs. Bentley, his face full of consternation.</p>
-
-<p>'I am very sorry, but she did not give me time to speak. Will you go and
-fetch her, Mrs. Bentley? I want to tell her I hope she will never leave
-Ashwood. ... I believe she thinks that I came down here to ask her to leave
-as soon as possible. It is really quite awful that she should think such a
-thing.'</p>
-
-<p>'She is an exceedingly sensitive girl, and is now a little overwrought.
-The events of the last month have proved too much for her.'</p>
-
-<p>'Mr. Grandly informed me that it was Mr. Burnett's intention to add a
-codicil to his will, leaving Miss Watson three hundred a year. This money I
-am prepared to give her, and I'm quite sure she is welcome to stay here as
-long as she pleases. Indeed, she will do me a great favour by remaining.
-Please go and tell her. I cannot bear to see a girl cry; to hear her sob
-like that is quite terrible.'</p>
-
-<a name="122.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'You will be able to tell her yourself during the course of the evening.
-I think it will come better from you.'</p>
-
-<p>'After what has happened, it will be very difficult for me to meet her
-until she is informed that she is mistaken. I charged Mr. Grandly to
-explain everything in his letter. Apparently he omitted to do so.'</p>
-
-<p>'He only said you wanted to see Emily on a matter of business. Of course
-we did not expect such generosity.'</p>
-
-<p>They were standing quite close together, and suddenly Hubert became
-conscious of Mrs. Bentley's beauty. Her blue eyes were at that moment full
-of tender admiration for the instinctive generosity which Hubert so
-unwittingly exhibited, and her eyes told what was passing in her soul.
-Suddenly they both seemed to understand each other better, and, playing
-with the bracelet on her arm, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'You do not know Emily; she is strangely sensitive. But I will go and
-try to persuade her to return.... Although only distantly related, you are
-cousins, after all&mdash;are you not?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, we are cousins, but the relationship is remote. Tell her
-everything; beg of her to come down-stairs.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert imagined Emily's little black figure thrown <a name="123.png"
-class="pb"></a> upon her bed, sobbing convulsively. He was very much
-agitated, and looked about the room, at first hardly seeing it. At last its
-novelty drew his thoughts from his cousin's tears, and he wondered what was
-the history of the house. 'The old man,' he thought, 'bought it all,
-furniture and ancestors, from some ruined landowner, and attempted very few
-alterations&mdash;that's clear.' Then he reproached himself. 'How could I have
-been so stupid? I did not know what I was saying. I was so horribly
-nervous. Those strange eyes of hers quite upset me. I do hope Mrs. Bentley
-will tell her that I wish to act generously, that I am prepared to do
-everything in my power to make her happy. Poor little thing! She looks as
-if she had never been happy.' Again the room drew Hubert's thoughts away
-from his cousin. It was still lit with the faint perfumed glow of the
-sunset. The paint of the old decorations was cracked and faded. A man in a
-plum-coloured coat with gold facings fixed his eyes upon him, and the tall
-lady in blue satin had no doubt played there in short clothes. He walked up
-and down, he turned over the music on the piano, and, hearing a step,
-looked round. It was only the servant coming to tell him that his room was
-ready.</p>
-
-<p>He dressed for dinner, hoping to find the two ladies <a name="124.png"
-class="pb"></a> in the drawing-room, and it was a disappointment to find
-only Mrs. Bentley there.</p>
-
-<p>'I have told Emily everything you said. She is very grateful, and begs
-of me to thank you for your kind intentions. But I am afraid you must
-excuse her absence from dinner. I really don't think she is in a fit state
-to come down; she couldn't possibly take part in the conversation.'</p>
-
-<p>'But why? I hope she isn't ill? Had we better send for the doctor?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh no; she'll be all right in the morning. She has been crying. She
-suffers from depression of spirits. She is, I assure you, all right,' said
-Mrs. Bentley, replying to Hubert's alarmed and questioning face. 'I assure
-you there is no need for you to reproach yourself. Dinner is ready.' She
-took his arm, and they went into the dining-room.</p>
-
-<p>No further mention was made of Mr. Burnett, of money matters, or of the
-young lady up-stairs; and with considerable tact Mrs. Bentley introduced
-the subject of literature, alluding gracefully to Hubert's position as a
-dramatist.</p>
-
-<p>'Your play, <i>Divorce</i>, is now running at the Queen's Theatre?'</p>
-
-<p>No; I'm sorry to say it was taken out of the bills <a name="125.png"
-class="pb"></a> last Saturday. Saturday night was the last
-performance.'</p>
-
-<p>'That was not a long run. And the papers spoke so favourably of it.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is a play that only appeals to the few.' And, encouraged by Mrs.
-Bentley's manner, Hubert told her how happy endings and comic love-scenes
-were essential to secure a popular success.</p>
-
-<p>'I am afraid you will think me very stupid, but I do not quite
-understand.'</p>
-
-<p>In a quiet, unobtrusive way Hubert was a graceful talker, and he knew
-how to adapt his theme, and bring it within the circle of the sympathies of
-his listeners. There was some similarity of temperament between himself and
-Mrs. Bentley; they were both quiet, fair, meditative Saxons. She lent her
-whole mind to the conversation, interested in the account that the young
-man gave of his dramatic aspirations.</p>
-
-<p>From the dining-room window looking over the park the long road wound
-through the vaporous country. The town stood in the middle distance, its
-colour blotted out, and its smoke hardly distinguishable. In the room a
-yellow dress turned grey, and the gold of a bracelet grew darker, and the
-pink of delicate finger-nails was no longer visible. But the <a
-name="126.png" class="pb"></a> pensive dusk of the dining-room, which
-blackened the claret in the decanters, leaving only the faintest ruby glow
-in the glass which Hubert raised to his lips, suited the tenor of the
-conversation, which had wandered from the dramatic to the social side of
-the question. What did he think of divorce? She sighed, and he wondered
-what her story might be.</p>
-
-<p>They passed out of the dining-room, and stood on the gravel, watching
-the night gathering in the open country. In the light of the moon, which
-had just risen above the woods, the white road grew whiter, the town was
-faintly seen in the tide of blue vapour, which here and there allowed a
-field to appear. In the foreground a great silver fir, spiky and solitary,
-rose up in the blue night. Beyond it was seen a corner of the ornamental
-bridge. The island and its shadow were one black mass rising from the park
-up to the level of the moon, which, a little to the right, between the town
-and the island, lay reflected in a narrow strip of water. Farther away some
-reeds were visible in the illusive light, and the meditative chatter of
-dozing ducks stirred the silence which wrapped the country like a
-cloak.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood looking at the landscape. The fragrance of
-his cigar, the presence of <a name="127.png" class="pb"></a> the woman, the
-tenderness of the hour, combined to make him strangely happy; his past life
-seemed to him like a harsh, cruel pain that had suddenly ceased. More than
-he had ever desired seemed to be fulfilled; the reality exceeded the dream.
-What greater happiness than to live here, and with this woman! His thoughts
-paused, for he had forgotten the girl up-stairs. She was not happy; but he
-would make her happy&mdash;of that he was quite certain. At that moment Mrs.
-Bentley said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I hope you like your home. Is not the prospect a lovely one?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; but I was thinking at that moment of Emily. I suppose I must
-accustom myself to call her by her Christian name. She is my cousin, and we
-are going to live together. But, by the way, she cannot stay here alone. I
-hope&mdash;I may trust that you will remain with her?'</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Bentley turned her face towards him; he noticed the look of
-pleasure that had passed into it.</p>
-
-<p>'Thank you; it is very good of you. I shall be glad to remain with Emily
-as long as she cares for my society. It is needless to say I shall do my
-best to deserve your approval.'</p>
-
-<a name="128.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<a name="129.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<div class="image"><a href="images/image04.jpeg"><img src="images/image04-thumb.jpeg"
-align="left" alt="[drawing]"></a>
-
-"They dined at the Caf&eacute; Royal." </div>
-
-<br>
-
-<a name="130.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Her voice fell, and he heard her sigh, and in his happiness it seemed to
-him to be a pity that he should find unhappiness in others.</p>
-
-<p>They went into the drawing-room. Mrs. Bentley asked him if he liked
-music, and she went to the piano and sang some Scotch songs very sweetly.
-Then she took a book from the table and bade him good-night. She was sure
-that he would excuse her. She must go and see after Emily.</p>
-
-<p>When the door closed, the woman who had just left him seemed like some
-one he had seen in a dream; and still more shadowy and illusive did the
-girl seem&mdash;that pale and plaintive beauty, looking like a pastel, who had
-so troubled him with her enigmatic eyes! And the lodging-house that he had
-left only a few hours ago! and Rose.</p>
-
-<p>On Sunday he had taken Rose out to dinner. They dined at the
-Caf&eacute;-Royal. He had tried to talk to her about Hamilton Brown's new drama,
-which they had just heard would follow <i>Divorce</i>; but he was unable to
-detach his thoughts from Ashwood and the ladies he was going to visit
-to-morrow evening. Hubert and Rose had felt like two school-fellows, one of
-whom is leaving school; the link that had bound them had snapped;
-henceforth their ways lay separate; and <a name="131.png" class="pb"></a>
-they were sad at parting just as school-friends are sad.</p>
-
-<p>'You are not rich; you offered to lend me money once. I want to lend you
-some now.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes; five shillings, wasn't it?'</p>
-
-<p>'It doesn't matter what the sum was&mdash;we were both very poor
-then&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'And I'm still poorer now.'</p>
-
-<p>'All the more reason why you should allow me to help you.... Allow me to
-write you a cheque for a hundred pounds. I assure you I can afford it.'</p>
-
-<p>'I think I had better not.... I have some things I can sell.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you must not sell your things. Indeed, you must allow me&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I think I'd rather not. I shall be all right&mdash;that is to say, if Ford
-engages me for Brown's new piece; and I think he will.'</p>
-
-<p>'But if he doesn't?'</p>
-
-<p>'Then,' she said, with a sweet and natural smile, 'I'll write to you....
-We have been excellent friends&mdash;comrades&mdash;have we not?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, we have indeed, and I shall never forget. There is my address;
-that will always find me.'</p>
-
-<p>He had written a play&mdash;a play that the most competent <a name="132.png"
-class="pb"></a> critics had considered a work of genius; in any case, a
-play that had interested his generation more than any other. It had failed,
-and failed twice; but did that prove anything? Fortune had deserted him,
-and he had been unable to finish <i>The Gipsy</i>. Was it the fault of
-circumstances that he had not been able to finish that play? or was it that
-the slight vein of genius that had been in him once had been exhausted? He
-remembered the article in <i>The Modern Review</i>, and was frightened to
-think that the critic might have divined the truth. Once it had seemed
-impossible to finish that play; but fortune had come to his aid, accident
-had made him master of his destiny; he could spend three years, five years
-if he liked, on <i>The Gipsy</i>. But why think of the play at all? What
-did it matter even if he never wrote it? There were many things to do in
-life besides writing plays. There was life! His life was henceforth his
-own, and he could live it as he pleased. What should he do with it? To whom
-should he give it? Should he keep it all for himself and his art? It were
-useless to make plans. All he knew for certain was that henceforth he was
-master of his own life, and could dispense it as he pleased.</p>
-
-<p>And then, in sensuous curiosity, his thoughts turned <a name="133.png"
-class="pb"></a> on the pleasure of life in this beautiful house, in the
-society of two charming women.</p>
-
-<p>'Perhaps I shall marry one of them. Which do I like the better? I
-haven't the least idea.' And then, as his thoughts detached themselves, he
-remembered Emily's tears.</p>
-
-<a name="134.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>X</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">It</span> was a day of English summer, and the
-meadows and trees drowsed in the moist atmosphere; a few white clouds hung
-lazily in the blue sky; the garden was bright with geraniums and early
-roses, and the closely cropped privets were in full leaf. Hubert's senses
-were taken with the beauty of the morning, and there came the thought, so
-delicious, 'All this is mine.' He noticed the glitter of the greenhouses,
-and thought the cawing of some young rooks a sweet sound; a great
-tortoiseshell cat lay basking in the middle of the greensward, whisking its
-furry tail. Hubert stroked the animal; it arched its back, and rubbed
-itself against his legs. At that moment a half-bred fox-terrier barked
-noisily at him; he heard some one calling the dog, and saw a slight black
-figure hastening down one of the side-walks. Despite the dog's attempts on
-his legs, he ran forward.</p>
-
-<p>'Emily! Emily!' he called. She stopped, turned, and stood looking at
-him.</p>
-
-<a name="135.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'My dear cousin,' he said. 'I'm sorry about last night. I hope that Mrs.
-Bentley has told you. I begged of her to do so.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; she told me of your kind intentions. I have to thank you.'</p>
-
-<p>They walked on in silence, neither knowing what to say.</p>
-
-<p>'Go away, Dandy!' said Emily, thrusting her black silk parasol at the
-dog, who had begun an attack on Hubert's trousers. The dog retreated;
-Hubert laughed.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm afraid he doesn't like me.'</p>
-
-<p>'He'll soon get to know you. Are you fond of animals?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't know that I am, particularly.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh!' she said, looking at him reproachfully, 'how can you?' Her eyes
-seemed to say, 'I never can like you after that.' 'I adore animals,' she
-said. 'My dear dog&mdash;there is nothing in the world I love as I love my
-Dandy; come here, dear.' The dog came, wagging his tail, putting back his
-ears, knowing he was going to be caressed. Emily stooped down, took his
-rough head in her hands, and kissed him. 'Is he not a dear?' she said,
-looking up; and then she said, 'I hope you won't object to having him in
-the house;' her face clouded.</p>
-
-<a name="136.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Oh, my dear Emily, how can you ask such a question? I shall never
-object to anything you desire.' The conversation paused, and they walked
-some paces in silence. Emily had just begun to speak of her flowers, when
-they came upon the gardener, who was standing in consternation over the
-fragments of a broken mowing-machine. Jack&mdash;that was the donkey&mdash;had been
-left to himself just for a moment. It was impossible to say what wild freak
-had taken him; but instead of waiting, as he was expected to wait,
-stolidly, he had started off on a wild career, regardless of the safety of
-the machine. At the first bound it had come in contact with a flower-vase,
-which had been sent in many pieces over the sward; at the second it had met
-with some stone coping; and at the third it had turned over in complete
-dissolution, and Jack was free to tear up the turf with his hoofs, until
-finally his erratic course was stopped by the small boy who was responsible
-for the animal's behaviour. The arrival of Hubert and Emily saved the small
-boy from many a cuff and the donkey from a kick or two; and Jack stood amid
-the ruin he had created, as quiet and as docile a creature as the mind
-could imagine.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, you&mdash;you wicked Jack! Who would have <a name="137.png"
-class="pb"></a> thought it of you?' said Emily, throwing her arms round the
-animal's neck. 'And at your age, too! This is my old donkey,' she said,
-turning her dreamy eyes on Hubert. 'I used to ride him every day until
-about two years ago. I love my dear old Jack, and would not have him beaten
-for worlds, although he is so wicked as to break the mowing-machine. Look
-what you have done to the flower-vase.' The animal shook its long ears.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert and Emily strolled down a long walk, wondering what they should
-talk about.</p>
-
-<p>'These are really very pretty grounds,' he said at last. 'I am sure I
-shall enjoy myself immensely here.' The remark appeared to him to be of
-doubtful taste, and he hastened to add, 'That is to say, if I have
-completely made it up with my pretty cousin.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you have not seen the place yet,' she said, speaking still with a
-certain tremor in her voice. 'You haven't even seen the gardens. Come, and
-I'll show them to you.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert would have preferred to walk with her through these ornamental
-swards; and he liked the espalier apple-trees with which the garden was
-divided better than the glare and heat of the greenhouses into which she
-took him.</p>
-
-<a name="138.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Do you care for flowers?'</p>
-
-<p>'Not very much.'</p>
-
-<p>'These are all my flowers,' she said, pointing to many rows of
-flower-pots. 'Those are Julia's. You see I run a line of thread around
-mine, so that there shall be no mistake. She is not nearly so careful as I
-am, and it isn't nice to find that the plants you have been tending for
-weeks have been spoilt by over-watering. I don't say she doesn't love them,
-but she forgets them.... Just look at those; they are devoured by insects.
-They want to be taken out and given a thorough cleansing. Even then I doubt
-if they would come out right,&mdash;a plant never forgives you; it is just like
-a human being.'</p>
-
-<p>'And doesn't a human being ever forgive?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, I didn't mean that!' she said, blushing; 'but sometimes I could cry
-over the poor plants which she neglects. I daresay you will think me very
-ridiculous, but I do cry sometimes, and sometimes I cannot resist taking
-them out on the sly, and giving them a thoroughly good syringing,&mdash;only you
-must not tell her; we have agreed not to touch each other's flowers. But I
-cannot bear to see the poor things dying. How do we know that they do not
-suffer?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't think it probable.'</p>
-
-<a name="139.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'But we don't know for certain,' she said, fixing her great eyes on him.
-'Do we?'</p>
-
-<p>'We know nothing for certain,' he answered; and then he said, 'You and
-Mrs. Bentley have lived a long time together?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; not very long. About a couple of years. I was about thirteen when I
-came to Ashwood. I am now eighteen. Mrs. Bentley is a sort of connection.
-She is very poor&mdash;that is why Mr. Burnett asked her to come and live here;
-besides, as I grew up I wanted a companion. She has been very good to me.
-We have been very happy together&mdash;at least, as happy as one may be; for I
-don't think that any one is ever very happy. Have you been very happy?'</p>
-
-<p>'I have not always been happy. But tell me more about Mrs. Bentley.'</p>
-
-<p>'There is little more to tell. I naturally love her very much. She
-nursed me when I was ill&mdash;and I'm often ill; she taught me all I know; she
-cheered me when I was sad&mdash;when I thought my heart would break; when
-everybody else seemed unkind she was kind. Besides, I could not remain here
-without her.' Emily lowered her eyes, and the conversation seemed to
-pause.</p>
-
-<p>'I have arranged all that,' Hubert answered <a name="140.png"
-class="pb"></a> hurriedly. 'I spoke to her last night, and she has
-consented to remain.'</p>
-
-<p>'That is very good of you.' Emily raised her eyes and looked shyly at
-Hubert; and then, as if doubtful of herself, she said, 'Do you like her?
-I'm sure you do. Every one does. Do you not think she is very
-handsome?'</p>
-
-<p>'I think her an exceedingly pleasant woman, and I'm sure we shall all
-get on very well together.'</p>
-
-<p>'But don't you think her very handsome?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; she is a handsome woman.'</p>
-
-<p>Nothing more was said. Emily drew meditatively on the gravel with the
-point of her parasol. The gardeners looked up from their work.</p>
-
-<p>'I have to go now,' she said, raising her eyes timidly, 'to feed the
-swans. You would not care to go so far?'</p>
-
-<p>'On the contrary, I should like it, of all things. A walk by the water
-on a day like this will be quite a treat.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then will you wait a moment? I will go and fetch the bread.' She
-returned soon after with a small basket; and a large retriever, tied up in
-the corner of the yard, barked and lugged at his chain. 'He knows where I
-am going, and is afraid I shall forget him&mdash;aren't you, <a name="141.png"
-class="pb"></a> dear old Don? You wouldn't like to miss a walk with your
-mistress, would you, dear?' The dog bounded and rushed from side to side;
-it was with difficulty that Emily loosed him. Once free, he galloped down
-the drive, returning at intervals for a caress and a sniff at the basket
-which his mistress carried. 'There's nothing there for you, my beautiful
-Don!'</p>
-
-<p>The drive sloped from the house down to the artificial water, passing
-under some large elms; and in the twilight of the branches where the
-sunlight played, and the silence was tremulous with wings, Hubert felt that
-Emily had forgiven him. She wore the same black dress that he had admired
-her in the night before; her waist was confined by the same black band; but
-the chestnut hair seemed more beautiful beneath the black silk sunshade,
-leaned so gracefully, the black handle held between thumb and forefinger.
-And the little black figure seemed a part of the beautiful English park,
-now so green and fragrant in all the flower and sunlight of June, and
-decorated with a blue summer sky, and white clouds moving lazily over the
-tops of the trees. And the impression of the beautiful park was enforced by
-its reflection, which lay, with the mute magic of reflected things, in the
-still water, stirred only when, with exquisite motion of webbed feet, the
-<a name="142.png" class="pb"></a> swans propelled their freshness to and
-fro, balancing themselves in the current where they knew the bread must
-surely fall.</p>
-
-<p>'They are waiting for me. Cannot you see their black eyes turned towards
-the bridge?' And she threw the bread from the basket, and the beautiful
-birds unbent their curved necks, devouring it voraciously under the
-water.</p>
-
-<p>In the larger portion of this artificial lake there were two islands,
-thickly wooded. In the smaller, which lay behind Emily and Hubert, there
-was one small island covered with reeds and low bushes, and this was a
-favourite haunt for the waterfowl, which now came swimming forward, not
-daring to approach too near the dangerous swans.</p>
-
-<p>'These are my friends,' said Emily. 'They will follow me to the other
-end, and I shall be able to feed them as we walk along the meadow.'</p>
-
-<p>Don and Dandy bounded through the tall grass; sometimes foolishly giving
-chase to the birds that rose up out of the golden grasses, barking in mad
-eagerness&mdash;sometimes pursuing a hare into the distant woods. The last chase
-had led them far, and both dogs returned panting to walk till they
-recovered breath by their mistress's side; and to satisfy the retriever's
-<a name="143.png" class="pb"></a> affection Emily held one hand to him.
-Playing gently with his ears, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Did you ever see much of Mr. Burnett?'</p>
-
-<p>'Not since I was a boy, ten or twelve years ago, when I was at the
-University. There was absolutely no reason for his doing what he did.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; there was,' she said in a strangely decisive tone.</p>
-
-<p>'May I ask&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I do not know if I ought to tell you. It would be better not to. You
-know,' she continued, speaking now with a nervous tremor in her voice,
-'that I do not want you to think that I am so very disappointed. I do not
-know that I am disappointed at all. You have acted so generously, and it
-will be pleasanter to live here with you than with that old man.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation fell; but the sweet meadow seemed to induce
-confidences, and they were so happy in their youth and the sorcery of the
-sunshine. 'Five years ago I wrote to him,' said Hubert, speaking very
-slowly, 'asking him to lend me fifty pounds, and he refused. Since then I
-have not heard from him.' At the end of a long silence, the girl said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'So long as you know that I am no longer angry <a name="144.png"
-class="pb"></a> with him for having disinherited me, I do not mind telling
-you the reason. Two months before he died he asked me to marry him, and I
-refused.'</p>
-
-<p>They walked several yards without speaking.</p>
-
-<p>'Do you not think I was right? I was only eighteen, and he was over
-sixty.'</p>
-
-<p>'It seems to me quite shocking that he could have even contemplated such
-a thing.'</p>
-
-<p>'But look at these poor ducks; they have followed us all the way, and I
-have forgotten to feed them!' Taking out all the bread that remained in the
-basket, Emily threw it to the ducks that had collected where the dammed-up
-stream that filled the lake trickled over a wooden sluice. There was a
-plank by which to cross the deep cutting. Hubert and Emily paused, and
-stood gazing at the large beech wood that swept over some rising ground.
-Don had not been seen for some time, and they both shouted to him.
-Presently a black mass was seen bounding through the flowers, and the
-panting animal once more ensconced himself by his mistress's side.</p>
-
-<p>'I was very fond of Mr. Burnett,' she said, 'but I could not marry him.
-I could not marry any man I did not love.'</p>
-
-<p>'And because you refused to marry him, he did <a name="145.png"
-class="pb"></a> not mention you in his will. I never heard of such
-selfishness before!'</p>
-
-<p>'Men are always selfish,' she said sententiously. 'But it really does
-not matter; things are just the same; he hasn't succeeded in altering
-anything&mdash;at least, not for the worse. We shall get on very well
-together.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused. Then Emily went on: 'You won't tell any one I
-told you? I only told you because I did not want you to think me selfish. I
-was afraid that after the foolish way I behaved last night you might think
-I hated you. Indeed, I do not. Perhaps everything has happened for the
-best. I was very fond of the old man. I gave him my whole heart; no father
-ever had a daughter more attached; but I could not marry him. And it was
-the remembrance of my love for him that made me burst out crying. I do not
-think I realised until I saw you how cruelly I had been treated. But you
-won't tell any one? You won't tell Mrs. Bentley? She knows, of course; but
-do not tell her that I told you. I do not care that my feelings should be
-made a subject of discussion. You promise me?'</p>
-
-<p>'I promise you.'</p>
-
-<p>They had now reached the tennis-lawn. The gong <a name="146.png"
-class="pb"></a> sounded, and Emily said, 'That is lunch, and we shall find
-Julia waiting for us in the dining-room.' It was as she said. Mrs. Bentley
-was standing by the sideboard, her basket of keys in her hand; she had not
-quite finished her housekeeping, and was giving some last instructions to
-the butler. Hubert noticed that the place at the head of the table was for
-him, and he sat down a little embarrassed, to carve a chicken. So much home
-after so many years of homelessness seemed strange.</p>
-
-<a name="147.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XI</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">On</span> the third day, as soon as breakfast
-was over, Hubert introduced the subject of his departure. Julia waited, but
-as Emily did not speak, she said, 'We thought you liked the country better
-than town.'</p>
-
-<p>'So I do, but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'He's tired of us, and we had better leave,' Emily said, abruptly.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert started a little; he looked appealingly at Julia, and seeing the
-look of genuine pain upon his face, she took pity on him. 'You should not
-speak like that, Emily dear; I can see that you pain Mr. Price very
-much.'</p>
-
-<p>'I hope, Emily, that you will stay here as long as you like,' he said,
-in a low, gentle voice; 'as long as it is convenient and agreeable to
-you.'</p>
-
-<p>'We cannot stay here without you,' Emily replied; 'we are your
-guests.'</p>
-
-<p>'And,' said Julia, smiling, 'if there are guests, there must be a host.
-But if you have business in London, of course you must go.'</p>
-
-<a name="148.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I was not thinking of myself,' said Hubert, 'but of you ladies. I was
-afraid that you were already tired of me; that you might like to be left
-alone; that you had business, preparations. I daresay I was all wrong; but
-if Emily knew&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm sorry, Hubert; I did not mean to offend you. I'm very unlucky.
-You'll forgive me.'</p>
-
-<p>'I've nothing to forgive; I only hope that you'll never think again that
-I want to get rid of you. I hope that you'll stop at Ashwood as long as
-ever it suits you to do so. I don't see how I can say more.'</p>
-
-<p>'I like to stop here as long as you are here,' Emily said, in a low
-voice. 'That is all I meant.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then we're all of one mind, I don't want to go back to London. If you
-don't find me in your way, I shall be delighted to stay.'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course,' said Julia, 'we poor country folk can hardly hope to amuse
-you.'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't know about that!' exclaimed Emily. 'Where would he find any one
-to play and sing to him in the evenings as you can?'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused, and all were happier that morning, though none
-knew why. Days passed, desultory and sweet, and with a pile of books about
-him, he lay in a long cane chair under the trees; then the <a
-name="149.png" class="pb"></a> book would drop on his knees, and blowing
-smoke in curling wreaths, he lost himself in dramatic meditations. It was
-pleasant to see that Emily had grown innocently, childishly fond of her
-cousin, and her fondness expressed itself in a number of pretty ways. 'Now,
-Hubert, Hubert, get out of my way,' she would say, feigning a charming
-petulance; or she would come and drag him out of his chair, saying, 'Come,
-Hubert, I can't allow you to lie there any longer; I have to go to South
-Water, and want you to come with me?'</p>
-
-<p>And walking together, they seemed like an Italian greyhound and a tall,
-shaggy setter.</p>
-
-<p>A cloud only appeared on Emily's face when Julia spoke of their
-departure. Julia had proposed that they should leave at the end of the
-month, and Emily had consented to this arrangement. The end of the month
-had appeared to her indefinitely distant, but three weeks of the subscribed
-time had passed, and signs of departure had become more numerous and more
-peremptory. Allusion had been made to the laundress, and Julia had asked
-Emily if she could get all her things into a single box; if not, they would
-have to send to Brighton for another. Emily had no notion of what her box
-would hold, and she showed little disposition to count her dresses or put
-her linen in order. <a name="150.png" class="pb"></a> She seemed entirely
-taken up thinking what books, what pictures, what china she could take
-away. She would like to have this bookcase, and might she not take the
-wardrobe from her own room? and she had known the clock all her life, and
-it did seem so hard to part with it.</p>
-
-<p>'My dear girl, all these things belong to Mr. Price; you really cannot
-take them away without asking him.'</p>
-
-<p>'But he won't refuse; he'll let me have anything I like.'</p>
-
-<p>'He can't very well refuse, so I think it would be nicer on your part
-not to ask for anything.'</p>
-
-<p>'I must have some of these things: I want to make the house we are going
-to live in, in London, look as much like Ashwood as possible.'</p>
-
-<p>'You'd like to take the whole house with you if you could.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; I think I should.' And Emily turned and looked vaguely up and down
-the passage. 'I wonder if he'd give me the picture of the windmill?'</p>
-
-<p>'The landing would look very bare without it.'</p>
-
-<p>'It would indeed, and when we came down here on a visit&mdash;for I suppose
-we shall come down here sometimes on visits&mdash;I should miss the picture
-dreadfully, so I don't think I'll ask him for it. But I must take <a
-name="151.png" class="pb"></a> some pictures away with me. There are a lot
-of old things in the lumber-room at the top of the house, that no one knows
-anything about. I think I'll ask him to let me have them. I'll take him for
-a good long ramble through the house. He hasn't seen any of it yet, except
-just the rooms we live in down-stairs.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily went straight to Hubert. He was lying in the long wicker chair,
-his straw hat drawn over his eyes, for the sun was finding its sharp, white
-way through the leaves of the beeches.</p>
-
-<p>'Now, Hubert, I want you. Are you asleep?'</p>
-
-<p>'Asleep! No, I was only thinking.' He threw his legs over the edge of
-the low chair and stood up.</p>
-
-<p>'If I tell you what I want, you won't refuse me, will you?'</p>
-
-<p>'No,' he said smilingly; 'I don't think I shall.'</p>
-
-<p>'Are you sure?' she said, looking at him enigmatically. Then in a
-lighter tone: 'I want you to give me a lot of things&mdash;oh, not a great many,
-nothing very valuable, but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'But what, Emily?... You can have anything you want.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, we shall see. You must come with me; I must show you what&mdash;I
-shan't want them unless you like to give them. Come along. Oh, you must
-come. <a name="152.png" class="pb"></a> I should not care about them unless
-you came with me, and let me point them out.' She passed her little hand
-into the arm of his rough coat, and led him towards the house. 'You know
-nothing of your own house, so before I go I intend to show you all over it.
-You have no idea what a funny old place it is up-stairs&mdash;endless old
-lumber-rooms which you would never think of going into if I didn't take
-you. When I was a little girl I wasn't often allowed down-stairs: the top
-of the house still seems to me more real than any other part.' Throwing
-open a door at the head of the stairs, she said: 'This used to be my
-nursery. It is all bare and deserted now, but I remember it quite
-different. I used to spend hours looking out of that window. From it you
-can see all over the park, and the park used to be my great delight. I used
-to sit there and make resolutions that next time I went out I would be
-braver, and explore the hollows full of bushes and tall ferns.'</p>
-
-<p>'Did you never break your resolutions?'</p>
-
-<p>'Sometimes. I was afraid of meeting fairies or elves. There are glades
-and hollows that used to seem very wonderful. And they still seem very
-wonderful, only not quite in the same way. Doesn't the world seem very
-wonderful to you? I'm always wondering at things. <a name="153.png"
-class="pb"></a> But I know I'm only a silly little girl, and yet I like to
-talk to you about my fancies. Down there in the beech wood there is a
-beautiful glade. I loved to play there better than anywhere else. I used to
-lie there on a fur rug and play at paper dolls. I always fancied myself a
-duchess or a princess.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are full of dreams, Emily.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; I suppose I am. Everything is pleasant and happy in dreams. I love
-dreaming. They thought I'd never learn to read; but it wasn't because I was
-stupid, but because I wouldn't study. I'd put my hands to my head, and,
-looking at the book, which I didn't see, I'd think of all sorts of things,
-imagine myself a fairy princess.'</p>
-
-<p>'And it was in this room that you dreamed all those dreams?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; in this dear old room. You see that picture: that is one of the
-things I intended to ask you to give me.'</p>
-
-<p>'What? That old, dilapidated print?'</p>
-
-<p>'You mustn't abuse my picture. I used to spend hours wondering if those
-horsemen galloping so madly through the wood were robbers, and if they had
-robbed the castle shown between the trees. I used to wonder if they would
-succeed in escaping. They wouldn't <a name="154.png" class="pb"></a> gallop
-their horses like that unless they were being pursued.... Can I have the
-picture?'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course you can. Is that&mdash;that is not all you are going to ask me
-for?'</p>
-
-<p>'I did think of asking you for a few more things. Do you mind?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, not the least. The more you ask for, the more I shall be
-pleased.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then you must come down-stairs.'</p>
-
-<p>They went down to the next landing. Emily stopped before a bed-room,
-and, looking at Hubert shyly and interrogatively, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'This is my room. I don't know if it is in a fit state to show you. I'm
-not a very tidy girl. I'll look first.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; it will do,' she said, drawing back. 'You can look in. I want you
-to give me that wardrobe. It isn't a very handsome one, but I've used it
-ever since I was a little girl; it has a hollow top, and I used to hide
-things there. Do you think you can spare it?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; I think I can,' he said, smiling.</p>
-
-<p>Then she led him up-stairs through the old lumber rooms, picking out
-here and there some generally broken and always worthless piece of
-furniture, pleading for it timidly, and strangely delighted when he <a
-name="155.png" class="pb"></a> nodded, granting her every request. She
-asked him to pull out what she had chosen from the <i>d&eacute;bris</i>, and a
-curious collection they made in the passage&mdash;dim and worm-eaten pictures,
-small book-cases, broken vases which she proposed mending.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert wiped the dust from his hands and coat-sleeves.</p>
-
-<p>'What a lot of things you have given me! Now we shall be able to get on
-nicely with our furnishing.'</p>
-
-<p>'What furnishing?'</p>
-
-<p>'The furnishing of the little house in London where Julia and I are
-going to live. You said you intended to add a hundred a year to the three
-hundred a year which Mr. Burnett should have left me; I don't see why you
-should do such a thing, but if you do we shall have four hundred a year to
-live upon. Julia says that we shall then be able to afford to give fifty
-pounds a year for a house. We can get a very nice little house, she says,
-for that&mdash;of course, in one of the suburbs. The great expense will be the
-furnishing; we are going to do it on the hire system. I daresay one can get
-very nice things in that way, but I do want to make the place look a little
-like Ashwood; that is why I'm asking you for these things. I was always
-fond of playing in these old lumber-rooms, and these dim old <a
-name="156.png" class="pb"></a> pictures, which I don't think any one knows
-anything of except myself, will remind me of Ashwood. They will look very
-well, indeed, hanging round our little dining-room. You are sure you don't
-want them, do you?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I won't want them. I'm only too pleased to be able to give them to
-you.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are very good, indeed you are. Look at these old haymakers; I never
-saw but one little corner of this picture before; it was stowed away behind
-a lot of lumber, and I hadn't the strength to pull it out.... I'm afraid
-you've got yourself rather dusty.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh no; it will brush off.'</p>
-
-<p>'I shall hang this picture over the fireplace; it will look very well
-there. I daresay you don't see anything in it, but I'd sooner have these
-pictures than those down-stairs. I love the picture of the windmill on the
-first landing&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Then why not have it? I'll have it taken down at once.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I could not think of taking it. How would the landing look without
-it? I should miss it dreadfully when I came here&mdash;for I daresay you will
-ask us to visit you occasionally, when you are lonely, won't you?'</p>
-
-<a name="157.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, whenever you like, I hope you will come here.'</p>
-
-<p>'And you will come and stay with us in London? Your room will be always
-ready; I'll look after that. We shall feel very offended, indeed, if you
-ever think of going to an hotel. Of course, you mustn't expect much; we
-shall only be able to keep one servant, but we shall try to make you
-comfortable, and, when you come, you'll take me to the theatres, to see one
-of your own plays.'</p>
-
-<p>'If my play's being played, certainly. But would it be right for me to
-pay you visits in London?'</p>
-
-<p>'They would be very wicked people indeed who saw anything wrong in it;
-you are my cousin. But why do you say such things? You destroy all my
-pleasure, and I was so happy just now.'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm afraid, Emily, your happiness hangs on a very slender thread.'</p>
-
-<p>She looked at him inquiringly, but feeling that it would be unwise to
-attempt an explanation, he said in a different tone&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'But, Emily, if you love Ashwood so well, why do you go away?'</p>
-
-<p>'Why do I go away? We have been here now some time.... I can't live here
-always.'</p>
-
-<a name="158.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Why not? Why not let things go on just as they are?'</p>
-
-<p>'And live here with you, I and Julia?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; why not?'</p>
-
-<p>'We should bore you; you want to write your plays, you'd get tired of
-me.'</p>
-
-<p>'Your being here would not prevent my writing my plays. I have been
-thinking all the while of asking you to remain, but was afraid you would
-not care to live here.'</p>
-
-<p>'Not care to live here! But you'll get tired of us; we might
-quarrel.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; we shall never quarrel. You will be doing me a great favour by
-remaining. Just fancy living alone in this great house, not a soul to speak
-to all day! I'm sure I should end by going out and hanging myself on one of
-those trees.'</p>
-
-<p>'You wouldn't do that, would you?'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert laughed. 'You and Mrs. Bentley will be doing me a great favour by
-remaining. If you go away I shall be robbed right and left, the gardens
-will go to rack and ruin, and when you come down here you won't know the
-place, and then, perhaps, we shall quarrel.'</p>
-
-<p>'I shouldn't like Ashwood to go to rack and ruin&mdash;<a name="159.png"
-class="pb"></a>and my poor flowers! And I'm sure you'd forget to feed the
-swans. If you did that, I could not forgive you.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, let these grave considerations decide you to remain.'</p>
-
-<p>'Are you really serious?'</p>
-
-<p>'I never was more serious in my life.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well then, may I run and tell Julia?'</p>
-
-<p>'Certainly, and I'll&mdash;no, I won't. I'll look up the housemaids and tell
-them to restore this interesting collection of antiquities to their
-original dust.'</p>
-
-<a name="160.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XII</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">He</span> was, perhaps, a little too conscious
-of his happiness; and he feared to do anything that would endanger the
-pleasure of his present life. It seemed to him like a costly thing which
-might slip from his hand or be broken; and day by day he appreciated more
-and more the delicate comfort of this well-ordered house&mdash;its brightness,
-its ample rooms, the charm of space within and without, the health of
-regular and wholesome meals, the presence of these two women, whose first
-desire was to minister to his least wish or caprice. These, the first
-spoilings he had received, combined to render him singularly happy.
-Bohemianism, he often thought, had been forced upon him&mdash;it was not natural
-to him, and though spiritual belief was dead, he experienced in church a
-resurrection of influences which misfortune had hypnotised, but which were
-stirring again into life. He was conscious again of this revival of his
-early life in the evenings when Mrs. Bentley went to the piano; and when
-playing a game of chess or <a name="161.png" class="pb"></a> draughts,
-remembrances of the old Shropshire rectory came back, sudden, distinct, and
-sweet. In these days the disease of fame and artistic achievement only sang
-monotonously, plaintively, like the wind in the valleys where the wind
-never wholly rests.</p>
-
-<p>Sometimes, when moved by the novel he was reading, he would discuss its
-merits and demerits with the two women who sat by him in the quiet of the
-dim drawing-room, their work on their knees, thinking of him. In the
-excitement of criticism his thoughts wandered to his own work, and the
-women's eyes filled with reveries, and their hands folded languidly over
-their knees. He spoke without emphasis, his words seeming to drop from the
-thick obsession of his dream. At ten the ladies gathered up their work,
-bade him good-night; and nightly these good-nights grew tenderer, and
-nightly they went up-stairs more deeply penetrated with a sense of their
-happiness. But at heart he was a man's man. He hardly perceived life from a
-woman's point of view; and in the long evenings which he spent with these
-women he sometimes had to force himself to appear interested in their
-conversation. He was as far removed from one as from the other. Emily's
-wilfulness puzzled him, and he did not seem to have anything further to
-talk about to Mrs. Bentley.</p>
-
-<a name="162.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>He missed the bachelor evenings of former days&mdash;the whisky and water,
-the pipes, and the literary discussion; and as the days went by he began to
-think of London; his thoughts turned affectionately towards the friends he
-had not seen for so long, and at the end of July he announced his intention
-of running up to town for a few days. So one morning breakfast was hurried
-through; Emily was sure there was plenty of time; Hubert looked at the
-clock and said he must be off; Julia ran after him with parcels which he
-had forgotten; farewell signs were waved; the dog-cart passed out of sight,
-and, after lingering a moment, the women returned to the drawing-room
-thoughtfully.</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder if he'll catch the train,' said Emily, without taking her face
-from the window.</p>
-
-<p>'I hope so; it will be very tiresome for him if he has to come back.
-There isn't another train before three o'clock.'</p>
-
-<p>'If he missed this train he wouldn't go until to-morrow morning.... I
-wonder how long he'll stay away. Supposing something happened, and he never
-came back!' Emily turned round and looked at Julia in dreamy
-wonderment.</p>
-
-<p>'Not come back at all? What nonsense you are <a name="163.png"
-class="pb"></a> talking, Emily! He won't be away more than a fortnight or
-three weeks.'</p>
-
-<p>'Three weeks! that seems a very long while. How shall we get through our
-evenings?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily had again turned towards the window. Julia did not trouble to
-reply. She smiled a little, as she paused on the threshold, for she
-remembered that no more than a few weeks ago Emily had addressed to her
-passionate speeches declaring her to be her only friend, and that they
-would like to live together, content in each other's companionship, always
-ignoring the rest of the world. Although she had not mistaken these
-speeches for anything more than the nervous passion of a moment, the
-suddenness of the recantation surprised her a little. Three or four days
-after, the girl was in a different mood, and when they came into the
-drawing-room after dinner she threw her arms about Julia's neck, saying,
-'Isn't this like old times? Here we are, living all alone together, and I'm
-not boring myself a bit. I never shall have another friend like you,
-Julia.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you'll be very glad when Hubert comes back.'</p>
-
-<p>'There's no harm in that, is there? I should be very ungrateful if I
-wasn't. Think how good he has been to us.... I'm afraid you don't like him,
-Julia.'</p>
-
-<a name="164.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Oh, yes, I do, Emily.'</p>
-
-<p>'Not so much as I do.' And raising herself&mdash;she was sitting on Julia's
-knees&mdash;Emily looked at Julia.</p>
-
-<p>'Perhaps not,' Julia replied, smiling; 'but then I never hated him as
-much as you did.'</p>
-
-<p>A cloud came over Emily's face. 'I did hate him, didn't I? You remember
-that first evening? You remember when you came up-stairs and found me
-trembling in the passage&mdash;I was afraid to go to bed. ... I begged you to
-allow me to sleep with you. You remember how we listened for his footstep
-in the passage, as he went up to bed, and how I clung to you? Then the
-dreams of that night. I never told you what my dreams were, but you
-remember how I woke up with a cry, and you asked me what was the
-matter?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, I remember.'</p>
-
-<p>'I dreamt I was with him in a garden, and was trying to get away; but he
-held me by a single hair, and the hair would not break. How absurd dreams
-are! And the garden was full of flowers, but every time I tried to gather
-them, he pulled me back by that single hair. I don't remember any more,
-only something about running wildly away from him, and losing myself in a
-dark forest, and there the ground <a name="165.png" class="pb"></a> was
-soft like a bog, and it seemed as if I were going to be swallowed up every
-moment. It was a terrible sensation. All of a sudden I woke with a cry. The
-room was grey with dawn, and you said: "Emily dear, what have you been
-dreaming, to cry out like that?" I was too tired and frightened to tell you
-much about my dream, and next morning I had forgotten it. I did not
-remember it for a long time after, but all the same some of it came true.
-Don't you remember how I met Hubert next morning on the lawn? We went into
-the garden and spent the best part of the morning walking about the
-lake.... I don't know if I told you&mdash;I ran away when I heard him coming,
-and should have got away had it not been for this tiresome dog. He called
-after me, using my Christian name. I was so angry I think I hated him then
-more than ever. We walked a little way, and the next thing I remember was
-thinking how nice he was. I don't know how it all happened. Now I think of
-it, it seems like magic. It was the day that my old donkey ran away with
-the mowing machine and broke the flower-vase, the dear old thing; we had a
-long talk about "Jack." And then I took Hubert into the garden and showed
-him the flowers. I don't think he cares much about flowers; he pretended,
-<a name="166.png" class="pb"></a> but I could see it was only to please me.
-Then I knew that he liked me, for when I told him I was going to feed the
-swans, he said he loved swans and begged to be allowed to come too. I don't
-think a man would say that if he didn't like you, do you?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily's mind seemed to contain nothing but memories of Hubert. What he
-had said on this occasion, how he had looked at her on another. The
-conversation paused and Emily sunned herself in the enchantment of
-recollection, until at last breaking forth again, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Have you noticed how Ethel Eastwick goes after him? And the odd part of
-it is, that she can't see that he dislikes her. He thinks nothing of her
-singing; he remained talking to me in the conservatory the whole time. I
-asked him to come into the drawing-room, but he pretended to misunderstand
-me, and asked me if I felt a draught. He said, "Let me get you a shawl." I
-said, "I assure you, Hubert, I don't feel any draught." But he would not
-believe me, and said he could not allow me to sit there without something
-on my shoulders. I begged of him not to move, for I knew that Ethel would
-never forgive me if I interrupted her singing; but he said <a
-name="167.png" class="pb"></a> he could get me a wrap without interrupting
-any one. He opened the conservatory door, ran across the lawn round to the
-front door, and came back with&mdash;what do you think? With two wraps instead
-of one; one was mine, and the other belonged to&mdash;I don't know who it
-belonged to. So I said, "Oh, what ever shall we do? I cannot let you go
-back again. If any one was to come in and find me alone, what ever would
-they think!" Hubert said, "Will you come with me? A walk in the garden will
-be pleasanter than sitting in the conservatory." I didn't like going at
-first, but I thought there couldn't be much harm.'</p>
-
-<p>It seemed to Emily very terrible and very wonderful, and she experienced
-throughout her numbed sense a strange, thrilling pain, akin to joy, and she
-sat, her little fragile form lost in the arm-chair, her great eyes fixed in
-ecstasy, seeing still the dark garden with the great star risen like a
-phantom above the trees. That evening had been to her a wonder and an
-enchantment, and her pausing thoughts dwelt on the moment when the distant
-sound of a bell reached their ears, and the bell came nearer, clanging
-fiercely in the sonorous garden. Then they saw a light&mdash;some one had come
-for them with a lantern&mdash;a joke, a suitable pleasantry, and amid joyous
-laughter, watching the setting moon, <a name="168.png" class="pb"></a> they
-had gone back to the tiled house, where dancers still passed the
-white-curtained windows. Hubert had sat by her at supper, serving her with
-meat and drink. In the sway of memory she trembled and started, looking in
-the great arm-chair like a little bird that the moon keeps awake in its
-soft nest. She no longer wished to tell Julia of that night in the garden;
-her sensation of it lay far beyond words; it was her secret, and it shone
-through her dreamy youth even as the star had shone through the heavens
-that night. Suddenly she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder what Hubert is doing in London? I wonder where he is now?'</p>
-
-<p>'Now? It is just nine. I suppose he's in some theatre.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose he goes a great deal to the theatre. I wonder who he goes
-with. He has lots of friends in London&mdash;actresses, I suppose; he knows them
-who play in his plays. He dines at his club&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Or at a restaurant.'</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder what a restaurant is like; ladies dine at restaurants, don't
-they?'</p>
-
-<p>As Julia was about to make reply, the servant brought her a letter. She
-opened the envelope, and took out a long, closely-written letter; she
-turned it <a name="169.png" class="pb"></a> over to see the signature, and
-then looking toward Emily, she said, with a pleasant smile&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Now I shall be able to answer your questions better; this letter is
-from Mr. Price.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, what does he say? Read it.'</p>
-
-<p>'Wait a moment, let me glance through it first; it is very difficult to
-read.' A few moments after, Julia said, 'There's not much that would
-interest you in the letter, Emily; it is all about his play. He says he
-would have written before if he had not been so busy looking out for a
-theatre, and engaging actors and actresses. He hopes to start rehearsing
-next week.</p>
-
-<blockquote>
-
-<p>"I say I hope, because there are still some parts of the play which do
-not satisfy me, particularly the third act. I intend to work steadily on
-the play till, next Thursday, five or six hours every day; I am in perfect
-health and spirits, and ought to be able to get the thing right. Should I
-fail to satisfy myself, or should any further faults appear when we begin
-to rehearse the piece, I shall dismiss my people, pack up my traps, and
-return to Ashwood. There I shall have quiet; here, people are continually
-knocking at my door, and I cannot deny my friends the pleasure of seeing
-me, if that is a pleasure. But at Ashwood, as I say, I shall be sure of
-quiet, and can easily finish the play this autumn, and February is a better
-time than September to produce a play."'</p> </blockquote>
-
-<a name="170.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Then he goes on,' said Julia, 'to explain the alterations he
-contemplates making. There's no use reading you all that.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose you think I should not understand.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, if you want to read the letter, there it is.'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't want to see your letter.'</p>
-
-<p>'What do you mean, Emily?'</p>
-
-<p>'Nothing, only I think it rather strange that he didn't write to
-me.'</p>
-
-<p>Some days after, Emily took up the book that Julia had laid down.
-'"Shakespeare's Plays." I suppose you are reading them so that you'll be
-able to talk to him better.'</p>
-
-<p>'I never thought of such a thing, Emily.' At the end of a long silence
-Emily said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Do you think clever men like clever women?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't know. Some say they do, some say they don't. I believe that
-really clever men, men of genius, don't.'</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder if Hubert is a man of genius. What do you think?'</p>
-
-<p>'I really am not capable of expressing an opinion on the matter.'</p>
-
-<p>Another week passed away, and Emily began to <a name="171.png"
-class="pb"></a> assume an air of languor and timid yearning. One day she
-said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder he doesn't write. He hasn't answered my letter yet. Has he
-answered yours?'</p>
-
-<p>'He has not written to me again. He hasn't time for letter-writing. He
-is working night and day at his play.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose he'd never think of coming down by the morning train. He'd be
-sure to come by the five o'clock.'</p>
-
-<p>'He won't come without writing. He'd be sure to write for the
-dog-cart.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose so. There's no use in looking out for him.'</p>
-
-<p>But, notwithstanding her certitude on the point, Emily could not help
-choosing five o'clock as the time for a walk, and Julia noticed that the
-girl's feet seemed to turn instinctively towards the lodge. Often she would
-leave the flowers she was tending on the terrace, and stand looking through
-the dim, sun-smitten landscape toward the red-brown spot, which was
-Southwater, in the middle of the long plain.</p>
-
-<a name="172.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XIII</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Hubert</span> felt called upon to entertain his
-friends, and one evening they all sat dining at Hurlingham in the long
-room. The conversation, as usual, had been about books and pictures.</p>
-
-<p>It was the moment when strings of lanterns were hoisted from tree to
-tree. In front of a large space of sky the coloured globes were crude and
-trivial; but in the shadows of the trees by the river, where the mist rose
-into the branches, they had begun to awaken the first impression of
-melancholy and the sadness of <i>f&ecirc;te</i>. It was the moment when the
-great trees hung heavy and motionless, strangely green and solemn beneath a
-slate-coloured sky; and the plaintive waltz cried on Hungarian
-fiddle-strings, till it seemed the soul of this feminine evening. The
-fashionable crowd had moved out upon the lawn; the white dresses were
-phantom blue, and the men's coats faded into obscure masses, darkening the
-gathering shadows. It was the moment when voices soften, and every heart,
-overpowered with <a name="173.png" class="pb"></a> yearning, is impelled to
-tell of grief and disillusion; and every moment the wail of the fiddles
-grew more unbearable, tearing the heart to its very depths.</p>
-
-<p>Author and actor-manager walked up the lawn puffing at their cigars. The
-others sat watching, knowing that the opportunity had come for criticism of
-their friend.</p>
-
-<p>'He does not change much,' said Harding. 'Circumstances haven't affected
-him. A year ago he lived in a garret re-writing his play <i>Divorce</i>. He
-now rewrites <i>Divorce</i> in a handsome house in Sussex.'</p>
-
-<p>'I thought he had finished his play,' said Thompson. 'I heard that he
-was going to take a theatre and produce it himself.'</p>
-
-<p>'But did you not hear him say at dinner that he was re-writing as he
-rehearsed? I met one of the actors yesterday. He doesn't know what to make
-of it. He gets a new part every week to learn.'</p>
-
-<p>'Do you think he'll ever produce it?'</p>
-
-<p>'I doubt it. At the last moment he'll find that the third act doesn't
-satisfy him, and will postpone the production till the spring.'</p>
-
-<p>'What do you think of his work?'</p>
-
-<p>'Very intelligent, but a little insipid&mdash;like himself. Look at him.
-<i>Il est bien l'homme de ses ouvres</i>. There is something dry about him,
-and his writings are <a name="174.png" class="pb"></a> like himself&mdash;hard,
-dry and wanting in personal passion.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yet he talks charmingly, with vivacity and intelligence, and he is so
-full of appreciation of Shakespeare, Goethe, and such genuine love for
-antiquity.'</p>
-
-<p>'I've heard him talk Shakespeare, Goethe, and Ibsen,' said Harding, 'but
-I never heard him say anything new, anything personal. It seems to me that
-you mistake quotation for perception. He assimilates, but he originates
-nothing. He has read a great deal; he is covered with literature like a
-rock with moss and lichen. He's appreciative, I will say that for him. He
-would make a capital editor, or a tutor, or a don, an Oxford don. He would
-be perfectly happy as a don; he could read up the German critics and
-expound Sophocles. He would be perfectly happy as a don. As it is, he is
-perfectly miserable.'</p>
-
-<p>'There was a fellow who had a studio over mine,' said Thompson. 'He had
-been in the army and used to paint a bit. The academy by chance hung a
-portrait, so he left the army and turned portrait-painter. One day he saw a
-picture by Velasquez, and he understood how horrid were the red things he
-used to send to the academy. He used to come down to see me; he used to
-say, "I wish I had never seen a picture, by <a name="175.png"
-class="pb"></a> Gad, it is driving me out of my mind." Poor chap, I wanted
-him to go back to the army. I said, Why paint? no one forces you to; it
-makes you miserable; don't do so any more. When you have anything to say,
-art is a joy; when you haven't, it is a curse to yourself and to
-others.'</p>
-
-<p>Philipps, the editor of <i>The Cosmopolitan</i>, turned towards Harding,
-and he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I cannot follow you in your estimate of Hubert Price. I don't see him
-either mentally or physically as you do. It seems to me that you distort
-the facts to make them fit in with your theory. He is tall and thin, but I
-do not think that his nature is hard and dry. I should, on the contrary,
-say that he was of a soft rather than a hard nature. The expression of his
-face is mild and melancholy. I do not detect the dry, hard, rocky basis of
-which you speak. I should say that Price was a sentimental man.'</p>
-
-<p>'I have never heard of him being in love,' said Harding. 'I should say
-that he had been entirely uninfluenced by women.'</p>
-
-<p>'But love of women is only one form of sentimentality and not the
-highest, nor the deepest,' said Philipps. 'I can imagine a man being
-exceedingly sentimental and not caring about women at all.'</p>
-
-<a name="176.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'What you say is true,' said Harding. His face showed that he felt the
-observation to be true and was interested in it. 'But I think I described
-him truly when I said he was like a rock overgrown with moss and lichen.
-There is not sufficient root-hold for any idea to grow in him, it withers
-and dies. Examine his literature, and you'll see it is as I say. He has
-written some remarkable plays, I don't say he hasn't. But they seem to be
-better than they are. He gets a picturesque situation, but there is always
-something mechanical about it. There's a human emotion somewhere, but it's
-never really there; it might have been, but it is not.... It is very well
-done, it is very intelligent; but it does not seem to live, to
-palpitate.... In like manner there are men who have read everything, who
-understand everything, who can theorise; they can tell you all about the
-masterpiece, but when it comes to producing one, well, they're not on in
-that scene.'</p>
-
-<p>'What an excellent character he would make in a novel! A drama of
-sterility,' said Phillips.</p>
-
-<p>'Or the dramas which they bring about,' said Harding.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, or the dramas they bring about. But what drama can Price bring
-about&mdash;he shuts himself up in a <a name="177.png" class="pb"></a> room and
-tries to write a play,' said Phillips. 'I don't see how he can dramatise
-any life but his own.'</p>
-
-<p>'All deviations from the normal tend to bring about drama,' said
-Harding.</p>
-
-<p>'Then, why don't you do a Hubert Price in a book? It would be most
-interesting. Do you think you ever will?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't think so.'</p>
-
-<p>'Why not? Because he is a friend of yours, and you would not
-like&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I never allow my private life to interfere with my literature. No; for
-quite other reasons. I admit that he represents physically and mentally a
-great deal of the intellectual impotence current in our time. But it would
-be difficult, I think, to bring vividly before the reader that tall, thin,
-blonde man, with his pale gentle eyes and his insipid mind. I should take
-quite a different kind of man as my model.'</p>
-
-<p>'What kind of man?' said Phillips, and the five or six writers and
-painters leaned forward to listen to Harding.</p>
-
-<p>'I think I should imagine a man about the medium height. A nice figure,
-light, trim, neat. Good-looking, straight nose, eyes bright and
-intelligent. I think he would have beard, a very close-cut beard. The <a
-name="178.png" class="pb"></a> turn of his mind would be metaphysical and
-poetic&mdash;an intense subtility of mind combined with much order. He would be
-full of little habits. He would have note-books of a special kind in which
-to enter his ideas. The tendency of his mind would be towards concision,
-and he would by degrees extend his desire for concision into the twilight
-and the night of symbolism.'</p>
-
-<p>'A sort of constipated Browning,' said Phillips.</p>
-
-<p>'Exactly,' said Harding.</p>
-
-<p>'And would you have him married?' asked John Norton.</p>
-
-<p>'Certainly. I imagine him living in a tiny little house somewhere near
-the river&mdash;Westminster or Chelsea. His wife would be a dreadful person,
-thin, withered, herring-gutted&mdash;a sort of red herring with a cap. But his
-daughter would be charming, she would have inherited her father's features.
-I can imagine these women living in admiration of this man, tending on him,
-speaking very little, removed from worldly influences, seeing only the
-young men who come every Tuesday evening to listen to the poet's
-conversation&mdash;I don't hear them saying much&mdash;I can see them sitting in a
-corner listening for the ten thousandth time to aestheticisms not one word
-of which they understand, and about ten o'clock stealing away to some
-mysterious <a name="179.png" class="pb"></a> chamber. Something of the
-poet's sterility would have descended upon them.'</p>
-
-<p>'That is how you imagine <i>un g&eacute;nie rat&eacute;</i>,' said Phillips. 'Your
-conception is clear enough; why don't you write the book?'</p>
-
-<p>'Because there is nothing more to say on the subject. It is a subject
-for a sketch, not for a book. But of this I'm sure, that the dry-rock man
-would come out more clearly in a book than the soft, insipid, gentle,
-companionable, red-bearded fellow.'</p>
-
-<p>'If Price were the dry, sterile nature you describe, we should feel no
-interest in him, we should not be discussing him as we are,' said
-Phillips.</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, we should&mdash;Price suffers; we're interested in him because he
-suffers&mdash;because he suffers in public&mdash;"I never was happy except on those
-rare occasions when I thought I was a great man." In that sentence you'll
-find the clew to his attractiveness. But in him there is nothing of the
-irresponsible passion which is genius. There's that little Rose
-Massey&mdash;that little baby who spends half her day dreaming, and who is as
-ignorant as a cod-fish. Well, she has got that something&mdash;that undefinable
-but always recognisable something. It was Price who discovered her. We used
-to laugh at him when he said she had genius. He was right; <a
-name="180.png" class="pb"></a> we were wrong. The other night I was
-standing in the wings; she was coming down from her dressing-room&mdash;she
-lingered on the stairs, looking the most insignificant little thing you can
-well imagine; but the moment her cue came a strange light came into her
-eyes and a strange life was fused in her limbs; she was transformed, and
-went on the stage a very symbol of passion and romance.'</p>
-
-<p>The slate colour of the sky did not seem to change, and yet the night
-grew visibly denser in the park; and there had come the sensation of things
-ended, a movement of wraps thrown over shoulders and thought of bedtime and
-home. The crowd was moving away, and nearly lost in the darkness Hubert
-came towards his friends. He had just knocked the ash from his cigar, and
-as he drew in the smoke the glow of the lighted end fled over his blonde
-face.</p>
-
-<a name="181.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XIV</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">One</span> day a short letter came from Hubert,
-asking Mrs. Bentley to send the dog-cart to the station to fetch him. He
-had decided to come home at once, and postpone the production of his play
-till the coming spring.</p>
-
-<p>Every rehearsal had revealed new and serious faults of construction.
-These he had attempted to remove when he went home in the evening, but
-though he often worked till daybreak, he did not achieve much. The very
-knowledge that he must come to rehearsal with the re-written scene seemed
-to produce in him a sort of mental paralysis, and, striking the table with
-his fist, he would get up, and a thought would cross his mind of how he
-might escape from this torture. After one terrible night, in which he
-feared his brain was really giving way, he went down to the theatre and
-dismissed the company, for he had resolved to return to Ashwood and spend
-another autumn and another winter re-writing <i>The Gipsy</i>. If it did
-not come right then, <a name="182.png" class="pb"></a> he would bother no
-more about it. Why should he? There was so much else in life besides
-literature. He had plenty of money, and was determined in any case to enjoy
-himself. So did his thoughts run as he leaned back on the cushions of a
-first-class carriage, glancing casually through the evening paper.
-Presently his eye was caught by a paragraph narrating an odd calamity which
-had overtaken a scene carpenter, an honest, respectable, sober,
-hard-working man, who had fulfilled all social obligations as perfectly as
-the most exacting could desire, until the day he had conceived the idea of
-a machine for the better exhibition of advertisements on the hoardings. His
-system was based on the roller-towel. The roller was moved by clockwork,
-and the advertisements went round like the towel. At first he spent his
-spare time and his spare money upon it, but as the hobby took possession of
-him, he devoted all his time and all his money to it; then he pawned his
-clothes, and then he raised money on the furniture; the brokers came in,
-and finally the poor fellow was taken to a lunatic asylum, and his wife and
-family were thrown on the parish. The story impressed Hubert strangely. He
-saw an analogy between himself and the crazy inventor, and he asked himself
-if he would go on re-writing <i>The Gipsy</i> until <a name="183.png"
-class="pb"></a> he went out of his mind. 'Even if I do,' he thought, 'I can
-hurt no one but myself. No one else is dependent on me; my hobby can hurt
-no one but myself.' These forebodings passed away, and his mind filled up
-with schemes of work. He knew exactly what he wanted to do, and he looked
-forward to doing it. He wanted quiet, he wanted long days alone with
-himself. Such were his thoughts in the dog-cart as he drove home, and it
-was therefore vaguely unpleasant to him to meet the two ladies waiting for
-him at the lodge gate. Their smiles of welcome irritated him; he longed for
-the solitude of his study, the companionship of his work; and instead he
-had to sit with them in the drawing-room, and tell them how he liked
-London, what he had done there, whom he had seen there, and why he had been
-unable to finish his play to his satisfaction.</p>
-
-<p>In the morning Emily or Mrs. Bentley was generally about to pour out his
-coffee for him and keep him company. One day Hubert noticed that it was no
-longer Mrs. Bentley but Emily who met him in the passage, and followed him
-into the dining-room. And while he was eating she sat with her feet on the
-fender, talking of some girls in the neighbourhood&mdash;their jealousies, and
-how Edith Eastwick could not think of <a name="184.png" class="pb"></a>
-anything for herself, but always copied her dresses. Dandy drowsed at her
-feet, and very often she would take him to the window and make him go
-through all his tricks, calling on Hubert to admire him.</p>
-
-<p>She had a knack of monopolising Hubert, and since his return from
-London, her desire to do so had become almost a determination. Hubert
-showed no disinclination, and after breakfast they were to be seen together
-in the gardens. Hubert was a great catch, and there were other young ladies
-eager to be agreeable to him; but he did not seem to desire flirtation with
-any. So they came to speak of him as a very clever man, no doubt; but as
-they knew nothing about plays, he very probably did not care to talk to
-them. Hubert was not attractive in general society, and he would soon have
-failed to interest them at all had it not been for Emily. She was proud of
-her influence over him, and for the first time showed a desire to go into
-society. Day by day her conversation turned more and more on
-tennis-parties, and she even spoke about a ball. He consented to take her;
-and he had to dance with her, and she refused nearly every one, saying she
-was tired, leading Hubert away for long conversations in the galleries and
-on the staircases. Hubert had positively nothing to say to her; but she
-seemed quite happy as <a name="185.png" class="pb"></a> long as she was
-with him. And as they drove through the dawn Emily chattered of a hundred
-trifles,&mdash;what Edith had said, what Mabel wore, of the possibility of a
-marriage, and the arrival of a detachment of some cavalry regiment. Hubert
-found it hard to affect interest in these conversations. His brain was
-weary with waltz tunes, the shape of shoulders, and the glare and rustle of
-silk; but as she chattered, rubbing the misted windows from time to time,
-so as to determine how far they were from home, he wondered if he should
-ever marry, and half playfully he thought of her as his wife.</p>
-
-<p>But without warning his dreams were broken by a sudden thought, and he
-said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Another time, I think it will be better, my dear Emily, that Mrs.
-Bentley should take you out.'</p>
-
-<p>'Why should you not take me out?... I suppose you don't care to&mdash;I bore
-you.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; on the contrary, I enjoy it&mdash;I like to see you amused; but I think
-you should have a proper chaperon.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not answer; and a little cloud came over her face. Hubert
-thought she looked even prettier in her displeasure than she had done in
-her joy; and he went to sleep thinking of her. Never had he thought her so
-beautiful&mdash;never had she touched him with so <a name="186.png"
-class="pb"></a> personal an interest; and next morning, when he lounged in
-his study, he was glad to hear her knock at the door; and the half-hour he
-spent with her there, yielding to her pleading to come for a walk with her,
-or drive her over to Southwater in the dog-cart, was one of unalloyed
-pleasure. But a few days after, as he lay in bed, a new idea came to him
-for his third act. So he said he would have breakfast in his study. He
-dressed, thinking the whole time how he could round off his idea and bring
-it into the act. So clear and precise did it seem in his mind that he sat
-down immediately after breakfast, forgetting even his matutinal cigar, and
-wrote with a flowing pen. He had left orders that he was not to be
-disturbed; and was annoyed when the door opened and Emily entered.</p>
-
-<p>'I am very sorry, but you must not be cross with me; I do so want you to
-come and see the Eastwicks with me.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I could not think of such a thing this morning. I am
-very busy&mdash;indeed I am.'</p>
-
-<p>'What are you doing? Nothing very important, I can see. You are only
-writing your play. You might come with me.'</p>
-
-<p>'My play is as important to me as a visit to the Eastwicks is to you,'
-he answered, smiling.</p>
-
-<a name="187.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I have promised Edith.... I really do wish you would come.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, it is quite impossible: do let me get on with my
-work!'</p>
-
-<p>Emily's face instantly changed expression; she turned to leave the room,
-and Hubert had to go after her and beg her to forgive him&mdash;he really had
-not meant to be rude to her.</p>
-
-<p>'You don't care to talk to me. I am not clever enough for you.'</p>
-
-<p>Then pity took him, and he made amends by suggesting they should go for
-a walk in the park, and she often succeeded in leading him even to dry,
-uninteresting neighbours. But the burden grew heavier, and soon he could
-endure no longer the evenings of devotion to her in the drawing-room, where
-the presence of Mrs. Bentley seemed to fill her with incipient rebellion.
-One evening after dinner, as he was about to escape up-stairs, Emily took
-his arm, pleading that he should play at least one game of backgammon with
-her. He played three; and then, thinking he had done enough, he took up a
-novel and began to read. Emily was bitterly offended. She sat in a corner,
-a picture of deep misery; and whenever he spoke to Mrs. Bentley, he thought
-she would burst into tears. <a name="188.png" class="pb"></a> It was
-exasperating to be the perpetual victim of such folly; and, pressed by the
-desire to talk to Mrs. Bentley about the book he was reading, he suggested
-that she should come with him to the meet. The Harriers met for the first
-time that season at not five miles from Ashwood. Mrs. Bentley pleaded an
-engagement. She had promised to go over to tea at the rectory.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, we shall be back in plenty of time; I'll leave you at the rectory
-on our way home.'</p>
-
-<p>'Thank you, Mr. Price; but I do not think I can go.'</p>
-
-<p>'And why, may I ask?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, perhaps Emily would like to go.'</p>
-
-<p>'Emily has a cold, and it would be folly of her to venture a long drive
-on a cold morning.'</p>
-
-<p>'My cold is quite well.'</p>
-
-<p>'You were complaining before dinner how bad it was.'</p>
-
-<p>'If you don't want to take me, say so.' Tears were now streaming down
-her cheeks.</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I am only too pleased to have you with me; I was only
-thinking of your cold.'</p>
-
-<p>'My cold is quite gone,' she said, with brightening face; and next
-morning she came down with her waterproof on her arm, and she had on a new
-cloth dress which she had just received from London. <a name="189.png"
-class="pb"></a> Hubert recognised in each article of attire a sign that she
-was determined to carry her point. It seemed cruel to tell her to take her
-things off, and he glanced at Mrs. Bentley and wondered if she were
-offended.</p>
-
-<p>'I hope the drive won't tire you; you know the meet is at least five
-miles from here.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not answer. She looked charming with her great boa tied about
-her throat, and sprang into the dog-cart all lightness and joy.</p>
-
-<p>'I hope you are well wrapped up about the knees,' said Mrs. Bentley.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, thank you; Hubert is looking after me.'</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Bentley's calm, statuesque face, whereon no trace of envy appeared,
-caught Hubert's attention as he gathered up the reins, and he thought how
-her altruism contrasted with the passionate egotism of the young girl.</p>
-
-<p>'I hope Julia was not disappointed. I know she wanted to come;
-but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'But what?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, no one likes Julia more than I do, and I don't want to say
-anything against her; but, having lived so long with her, I see her faults
-better than you can. She is horribly selfish! It never occurs to her to
-think of me.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert did not answer, and Emily looked at him <a name="190.png"
-class="pb"></a> inquiringly. At last she said, 'I suppose you don't think
-so?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, Emily, since you ask me, I must say that I think she took it very
-good-humouredly. You said you were ill, and it was all arranged that I
-should drive her to the meet; then you suddenly interposed, and said you
-wanted to go; and the moment you mentioned your desire to go, she gave way
-without a word. I really don't know what more you want.'</p>
-
-<p>'You don't know Julia. You cannot read her face. She never forgets
-anything, and is storing it up, and will pay me out for it sooner or
-later.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, how can you say such things? I never heard&mdash;&mdash; She is
-always ready to sacrifice herself for you.'</p>
-
-<p>'You think so. She has a knack of pretending to be more unselfish than
-another; but she is in reality intensely selfish.'</p>
-
-<p>'All I can say is that it does not strike me so. I never saw any one
-give way more good-humouredly than she did to-day.'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't think that that is so wonderful, after all. She is only a paid
-companion; and I do not see why she should go driving about the country
-with you, and I be left at home.'</p>
-
-<a name="191.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>Hubert was somewhat shocked. The conversation paused.</p>
-
-<p>'She gets on very well with men,' Emily said at last, breaking an
-irritating silence somewhat suddenly. 'They say she is very good-looking.
-Don't you think so?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, she is certainly a pretty woman&mdash;or, I should say, a
-good-looking woman. She is too tall to be what one generally understands as
-a pretty woman.'</p>
-
-<p>'Do you like tall women?'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment the hunt appeared in the field at the bottom of the hill.
-A grey horse had just got rid of his rider, and after galloping round and
-round, his head in the air, stopped and began to graze. The others jumped
-the hedge, and the greater part of the field got over the brook in capital
-style. Emily and Hubert watched them with delighted eyes, for the sight was
-indeed picturesque this fine autumn day. Even their horse pricked up his
-ears and began neighing, and Hubert had to hold him tight in hand, lest he
-should break away while they were enjoying the spectacle. At that moment a
-poor little animal, with fear-haunted eyes, and in all the agony of
-fatigue, appeared above the crest of the hill, and immediately after came
-the <a name="192.png" class="pb"></a> straining hounds, one within a dozen
-yards of the poor little beast, now running in a circle, uttering the most
-plaintive and pitiful cries.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, they are not going to kill it!' cried Emily. 'Oh, save it, save it,
-Hubert!' She hid her face in her hands. 'Did it escape? is it killed?' she
-said, looking round. 'Oh, it is too cruel!' The huntsman was calling to the
-hounds, holding something above them, and at every moment horses' heads
-appeared over the brow of the hill.</p>
-
-<p>There was more hunting; and when the October night began to gather, and
-the lurid sunset flared up in the west, Hubert got out another wrap, and
-placed it about Emily's shoulders. But although the chill night had drawn
-them close together in the dog-cart, they were as widely separated as if
-oceans were between them. So far as lay in his power he had hidden the
-annoyance that the intrusion of her society had occasioned him; and, to
-deceive her, very little concealment was necessary. So long as she saw him
-she seemed to live in a dream, unconscious of every other thought.</p>
-
-<p>They rolled through a gradual effacement of things, seeing the lights of
-the farmhouses in the long plain start into existence, and then remain
-fixed, like gold <a name="193.png" class="pb"></a> beetles pinned on a blue
-curtain. The chill evening drew her to him, till they seemed one; and full
-of the intimate happiness of the senses which comes of a long day spent in
-the open air, she chattered of indifferent things. He thought how pleasant
-the drive would be were he with Mrs. Bentley&mdash;or, for the matter of that,
-with any one with whom he could talk about the novel that had interested
-him. They rolled along the smooth wide road, watching the streak of light
-growing narrower in a veil of light grey cloud drawn athwart the sky.
-Overpowered by her love, the girl hardly noticed his silence; and when they
-passed through the night of an overhanging wood her flesh thrilled, and a
-little faintness came over her; for the leaves that brushed her face had
-seemed like a kiss from her lover.</p>
-
-<a name="194.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XV</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">One</span> afternoon, about the end of
-September, Hubert came down from his study about tea-time, and announced
-that he had written the last scene of his last act. Emily was alone in the
-drawing-room.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, how glad I am! Then it is done at last. Why not write at once and
-engage the theatre? When shall we go to London?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, I don't mean that the play could be put into rehearsal to-morrow.
-It still requires a good deal of overhauling. Besides, even if it were
-completely finished, I should not care to produce it at once. I should like
-to lay it aside for a couple of months, and see how it read then.'</p>
-
-<p>'What a lot of trouble you do take! Does every one who writes plays take
-so much trouble?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, I'm afraid they do not, nor is it necessary they should. Their
-plays are merely incidents strung together more or less loosely; whereas my
-play is the development of a temperament, of temperamental <a
-name="195.png" class="pb"></a> characteristics which cannot be altered,
-having been inherited through centuries; it must therefore pursue its
-course to a fatal conclusion. In Shakespeare&mdash;&mdash; But no, no! these things
-have no interest for you. You shall have the nicest dress that money can
-buy; and if the play succeeds&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>The girl raised her pathetic eyes. In truth, she cared not at all what
-he talked to her about; she was occupied with her own thoughts of him, and
-just to sit in the room with him, and to look at him occasionally, was
-sufficient. But for once his words had pained her. It was because she could
-not understand that he did not care to talk to her. Why did she not
-understand? It was hard for a little girl like her to understand such
-things as he spoke about; but she would understand; and then her thoughts
-passed into words, and she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I understand quite as well as Julia. She, knows the names of more books
-than I, and she is very clever at pretending that she knows more than she
-does.'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment Mrs. Bentley entered. She saw that Emily was enjoying her
-talk with her cousin, and tried to withdraw. But Hubert told her that he
-had written the last act; she pretended to be looking for a <a
-name="196.png" class="pb"></a> book, and then for some work which she said
-had dropped out of her basket.</p>
-
-<p>'If Emily would only continue the talking,' she thought, 'I should be
-able to get away.' But Emily said not a word. She sat as if frozen in her
-chair; and at length Mrs. Bentley was obliged to enter, however cursorily,
-into the conversation.</p>
-
-<p>'If you have written out <i>The Gipsy</i> from end to end, I should
-advise you to produce it without further delay. Once it is put on the
-stage, you will be able to see better where it is wrong.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then it will be too late. The critics will have expressed their
-opinion; the work will be judged. There are only one or two points about
-which I am doubtful. I wish Harding were here. I cannot work unless I have
-some one to talk to about my work. I don't mean to say that I take advice;
-but the very fact of reading an act to a sympathetic listener helps me. I
-wrote the first act of <i>Divorce</i> in that way. It was all wrong. I had
-some vague ideas about how it might be mended. A friend came in; I told him
-my difficulties; in telling them they vanished, and I wrote an entirely new
-act that very night.'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm sorry,' said Mrs. Bentley, 'that I am not Mr. Harding. It must be
-very gratifying to one's feelings <a name="197.png" class="pb"></a> to be
-able to help to solve a literary difficulty, particularly if one cannot
-write oneself.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you can&mdash;I'm sure you can. I remember asking your advice once
-before; it was excellent, and was of immense help to me. Are you sure it
-will not bore you? I shall be so much obliged if you will.'</p>
-
-<p>'Bore me! No, it won't bore me,' said Mrs. Bentley. 'I'm sure I feel
-very much flattered.' The colour mounted to her cheek, a smile was on her
-lips; but it went out at the sight of Emily's face.</p>
-
-<p>'Then come up to my study. We shall have just time to get through the
-first act before dinner.'</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Bentley hesitated; and, noticing her hesitation, Hubert looked
-surprised. At that moment Emily said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'May I not come too?'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, I don't know, Emily. You see that we wish to see if there is
-anything in the play that a young girl should not hear.'</p>
-
-<p>'Always an excuse to get rid of me. You want to be alone. I never come
-into the room that you do not stop speaking. Oh, I can bear it no
-longer!'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily!'</p>
-
-<p>'Don't touch me! Go to her; shut yourself up together. Don't think of
-me. I can bear it no <a name="198.png" class="pb"></a> longer!' And she
-fled from the room, leaving behind her a sensation of alarm and pity.
-Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood looking at each other, both at a loss for
-words. At last he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'That poor child will cry herself into her grave. Have you noticed how
-poorly she is looking?'</p>
-
-<p>'Not noticed! But you do not know half of it. It has been going on now a
-long time. You don't know half!'</p>
-
-<p>'I have noticed that things are not settling down as I hoped they would.
-It really has become quite dreadful to see that poor face looking
-reproachfully at you all day long. And I am quite at a loss to know what's
-the right thing to do.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is worse than you think. You have not noticed that we hardly speak
-now?'</p>
-
-<p>'You&mdash;who were such friends&mdash;surely not!'</p>
-
-<p>Then she told him hurriedly, in brief phrases, of the change that had
-taken place in Emily in the last three months. 'It was only the other night
-she accused me of going after you, of having designs upon you. It is very
-painful to have to tell you these things, but I have no choice in the
-matter. She lay on her bed crying, saying that every one hated her, that
-she was thoroughly miserable. Somehow she seems naturally <a name="199.png"
-class="pb"></a> an unhappy child. She was unhappy at home before she came
-here; but then I believe she had excellent reasons,&mdash;her mother was a very
-terrible person. However, all that is past; we have to consider the present
-now. She accused me of having designs on you, insisting all the while that
-every one was talking about it, and that she was fretting solely because of
-my good name. Of course, it is very ridiculous; but it is very pitiful, and
-will end badly if we don't take means to put a stop to it. I shouldn't be
-surprised if she went off her head. We ought to have the best medical
-advice.'</p>
-
-<p>'This is very serious,' he said. And then, at the end of a long silence,
-he said again, 'This is very serious&mdash;perhaps far more serious than we
-think.'</p>
-
-<p>'Not more serious than I think. I ought to have spoken about it to you
-before; but the subject is a delicate one. She hardly sleeps at all at
-night; she cries sometimes for hours; she works herself up into such fits
-of nervousness that she doesn't know what she is saying,&mdash;accuses me of
-killing her, and then repents, declaring that I am the only one who has
-ever cared for her, and begs of me not to leave her. I do assure you it is
-becoming very serious.'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you any proposal to make regarding her? <a name="200.png"
-class="pb"></a> I need hardly say that I'm ready to carry out any idea of
-yours.'</p>
-
-<p>'You know what the cause of it is, I suppose?'</p>
-
-<p>'I do not know; I am not certain. I daresay I'm mistaken.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, you are not; I wish you were&mdash;that is to say, unless&mdash;&mdash; But I was
-saying that it is most serious. The child's health is affected; she is
-working herself up into an awful state of mind; she is losing all
-self-control. I'm sure I'm the last person who would say anything against
-her; but the time has come to speak out. Well, the other day, when we were
-at the Eastwicks, you took the chair next to mine when she left the room.
-When she returned, she saw that you had changed your place, and she said to
-Ethel Eastwick, "Oh, I'm fainting. I cannot go in there; they are
-together." Ethel had to take her up to her room. Well, this morbid
-sensitiveness is most unhealthy. If I walk out on the terrace, she follows,
-thinking that I have made an appointment to meet you. Jealousy of me fills
-up her whole mind. I assure you that I am most seriously alarmed. Something
-occurs every day&mdash;trifles, no doubt; and in anybody else they would mean
-nothing, but in her they mean a great deal.'</p>
-
-<p>'But what do you propose?'</p>
-
-<a name="201.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Unless you intend to marry her&mdash;forgive me for speaking so plain&mdash;there
-is only one thing to do. I must leave.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no; you must not leave! She could not live alone with me. But does
-she want you to leave?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; that is the worst of it. I have proposed it; she will not hear of
-it; to mention the subject is to provoke a scene. She is afraid if I left
-that you would come and see me; and the very thought of my escaping her
-vigilance is intolerable.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is very strange.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, it is very strange; but, opposed though she be to all thoughts of
-it, I must leave.'</p>
-
-<p>'As a favour I ask you to stay. Do me this service, I beg of you. I have
-set my heart on finishing my play this autumn. If it isn't finished now, it
-never will be finished; and your leaving would create so much trouble that
-all thought of work would be out of the question. Emily could not remain
-alone here with me. I should have to find another companion for her; and
-you know how difficult that would be. I'm worried quite enough as it is.' A
-look of pain passed through his eyes, and Mrs. Bentley wondered what he he
-could mean. 'No,' he said, taking her hands, 'we are good friends&mdash;are we
-not? Do me this service. <a name="202.png" class="pb"></a> Stay with me
-until I finish this play; then, if things do not mend, go, if you like, but
-not now. Will you promise me?'</p>
-
-<p>'I promise.'</p>
-
-<p>'Thank you. I am deeply obliged to you.'</p>
-
-<p>At the end of a long silence, Hubert said, 'Will you not come up-stairs,
-and let me read you the first act?'</p>
-
-<p>'I should like to, but I think it better not. If Emily heard that you
-had read me your play, she would not close her eyes to-night; it would be
-tears and misery all the night through.'</p>
-
-<a name="203.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XVI</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">The</span> study in which he had determined to
-write his masterpiece had been fitted up with taste and care. The floor was
-covered with a rare Persian carpet, and the walls were lined with graceful
-bookcases of Chippendale design; the volumes, half morocco, calf, and the
-yellow paper of French novels, showed through the diamond panes. The
-writing-table stood in front of the window; like the bookcases, it was
-Chippendale, and on the dark mahogany the handsome silver inkstand seemed
-to invite literary composition. There was a scent of flowers in the room.
-Emily had filled a bowl of old china with some pale September roses. The
-curtains were made of a modern cretonne&mdash;their colour was similar to the
-bowl of roses; and the large couch on which Hubert lay was covered with the
-same material. On one wall there was a sea-piece by Courbet, and upon
-another a river landscape, with rosy-tinted evening sky, by Corot. The
-chimney-piece was set out with a large gilt timepiece, and candelabra <a
-name="204.png" class="pb"></a> in Dresden china. Hubert had bought these
-works of art on the occasion of his last visit to London, about two months
-ago.</p>
-
-<p>It was twelve o'clock. He had finished reading his second act, and the
-reading had been a bitter disappointment. The idea floated, pure and
-seductive, in his mind; but when he tried to reduce it to a precise shape
-upon paper, it seemed to escape in some vague, mysterious way. Enticingly,
-like a butterfly it fluttered before him; he followed like a child,
-eagerly&mdash;his brain set on the mazy flight. It led him through a country
-where all was promise of milk and honey. He followed, sure that the
-alluring spirit would soon choose a flower; then he would capture it. Often
-it seemed to settle. He approached with palpitating heart; but lo! when the
-net was withdrawn it was empty.</p>
-
-<p>A look of pain and perplexity came upon his face; he remembered the
-lodging at seven shillings a week in the Tottenham Court Road. He had
-suffered there; but it seemed to him that he was suffering more here. He
-had changed his surroundings, but he had not changed himself. Success and
-failure, despair and hope, joy and sorrow, lie within and not without us.
-His pain lay at his heart's root; he could not pluck it forth, and its
-gratification seemed more than ever <a name="205.png" class="pb"></a>
-impossible. He changed his position on the couch. Suddenly his thoughts
-said, 'Perhaps I am mistaken in the subject. Perhaps that is the reason.
-Perhaps there is no play to be extracted from it; perhaps it would be
-better to abandon it and choose another.' For a few seconds he scanned the
-literary horizon of his mind. 'No, no!' he said bitterly, 'this is the play
-I was born to write. No other subject is possible; I can think of nothing
-else. This is all I can feel or see.' It was the second act that now defied
-his efforts. It had once seemed clear and of exquisite proportions; now no
-second act seemed possible: the subject did not seem to admit of a second
-act; and, clasping his forehead with his hands, he strove to think it
-out.</p>
-
-<p>Any distraction from the haunting pain, now become chronic, is welcome,
-and he answers with a glad 'Come in!' the knock at the door.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm sorry,' said Mrs. Bentley, 'for disturbing you, but I should like
-to know what fish you would like for your dinner&mdash;soles, turbot, or
-whiting? Immersed in literary problems as you are, I daresay these details
-are very prosaic; but I notice that later in the day&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert laughed. 'I find such details far more agreeable than literature.
-I can do nothing with my play.'</p>
-
-<a name="206.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Aren't you getting on this morning?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, not very well.'</p>
-
-<p>'What do you think of turbot?'</p>
-
-<p>'I think turbot very nice. Emily likes turbot.'</p>
-
-<p>'Very well, then. I'll order turbot.'</p>
-
-<p>As Mrs. Bentley was about to withdraw, she said, 'I'm sorry you are not
-getting on. What stops you now? That second act?'</p>
-
-<p>'Come, you are not very busy. I'll read you the act as it stands, and
-then tell you how I think it ought to be altered. Nothing helps me so much
-as to talk it over; not only does it clear up my ideas, but it gives me
-desire to write. My best work has always been done in that way.'</p>
-
-<p>'I really don't think I can stay. If Emily heard that you had been
-reading your play to me&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I'm tired of hearing of what Emily thinks. I can put up with a good
-deal, and I know that it is my duty to show much forbearance; but there is
-a limit to all things!' This was the first time Mrs. Bentley had seen him
-show either excitement or anger; she hardly knew him in this new aspect. In
-a moment the blonde calm of the Saxon had dropped from him, and some Celtic
-emphasis appeared in his speech. 'This hysterical girl,' he continued, 'is
-a sore burden. Tears <a name="207.png" class="pb"></a> about this, and
-sighs about that; fainting fits because I happen to take a chair next to
-yours. You may depend upon it our lives are already the constant gossip of
-the neighbourhood.'</p>
-
-<p>'I know it is very annoying; and I, I assure you, receive my share.
-Every look and word is misinterpreted. I must not stay here.'</p>
-
-<p>'You must not go! I really want you. I assure you that your opinion will
-be of value.'</p>
-
-<p>'But think of Emily. It will make her wretched if she hears of it. You
-do not know how it affects her. The slightest thing! You hardly see
-anything; I see it all.'</p>
-
-<p>'But there is no sense in it; it is pure madness. I'm writing a play,
-trying to work out a most difficult problem, and am in want of an audience,
-and I ask you if you will be kind enough to let me read you the act, and
-you cannot listen to it because&mdash;because&mdash;yes, that's just
-it&mdash;because!'</p>
-
-<p>'You do not know how she suffers. Let me go; spare her the pain.'</p>
-
-<p>'She is not the only one who suffers. Do you think that I don't suffer?
-I've set my heart&mdash;my very life is set on this play. I must get through
-with it; they are all waiting for it. My enemies say I cannot write it, but
-I shall if you will help me.'</p>
-
-<a name="208.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<div class="image"><a href="images/image05.jpeg"><img src="images/image05-thumb.jpeg"
-align="left" alt="[drawing]"></a>
-
-"Sometimes, in an exciting passage, the hands were clasped." </div>
-
-<br>
-
-<a name="209.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<a name="210.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Poor Emily's heart is equally broken. Her life is equally set&mdash;&mdash;' Mrs.
-Bentley did not finish. Hubert just caught the words. Their significance
-struck him; he looked questioningly into Mrs. Bentley's eyes; then,
-pretending not to have understood, he begged her to remain. With the air of
-one who yields to a temptation, she came into the room. He felt strangely
-happy, and, drawing over an arm-chair for her, he threw himself on the
-couch. He noticed that she wore a loose white jacket, and once during the
-reading of the act he was conscious of a beautiful hand hanging over the
-rail of the chair. Sometimes, in an exciting passage, the hands were
-clasped. The black slippers and the slender black-stockinged ankles showed
-beneath the skirt; and when he raised his eyes from the manuscript, he saw
-the blonde face and hair, and the pale eyes were always fixed upon him. She
-listened with a keen and penetrating interest to his criticism of the act,
-agreeing with him generally, sometimes quietly contesting a point, and with
-some strange fascination drawing new and unexpected ideas from him; and in
-the intellectual warmth of her femininity his brain seemed to clear and his
-ideas took new shape.</p>
-
-<p>'Ah,' he said, after two hours' delightful talk, 'how much I'm indebted
-to you! At last I see my mistakes; <a name="211.png" class="pb"></a> in two
-days I shall have written the act. And he wrote rapidly for nearly two
-hours, reconstructing the opening scenes of his second act.' He then threw
-himself on the couch, smoked a cigar, and after half an hour's rest
-continued writing till dinner-time.</p>
-
-<p>When he came down-stairs, the thought of what he had been writing was
-still so vivid in him that he did not notice at once the silence of those
-with whom he was dining. He complimented Mrs. Bentley on the freshness of
-the turbot; she hardly answered; and then he became aware that something
-had gone wrong. What? Only one thing was possible. Emily had heard that
-Mrs. Bentley had been in his study. Looking from the woman to the girl, he
-saw that the latter had been weeping. She was still in a highly hysterical
-state, and might burst into tears and fly from the dinner-table at any
-moment. His face changed expression, and it was with difficulty that he
-restrained his temper. His life had been made up of a constant recurrence
-of these scenes, and he was wholly weary of them; and the thought of the
-absolute want of reason in the causeless jealousy, and the misery that
-these little bickerings made of his life, exasperated him beyond measure.
-The dinner proceeded in silence, and every slight remark was a presage of
-storm. <a name="212.png" class="pb"></a> Hubert hoped the girl would say
-nothing until the servant left the room, and with that view he never spoke
-a word except to ask the ladies what they would take to eat. These tactics
-might have succeeded if Mrs. Bentley had not unfortunately said that next
-week she intended to go to London for a couple of days. 'The Eastwicks are
-there now, and they've asked me to stay with them.'</p>
-
-<p>'I think I shall go up with you. I want to go to London,' said
-Emily.</p>
-
-<p>'It will be very nice if you'll come; but we cannot both stay with the
-Eastwicks; they have only one spare room.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose you'd like me to go to an hotel.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, how can you think of such a thing? A young girl like you
-could not stay at an hotel alone. I shall be only too pleased if you will
-go to the Eastwicks; I will go to the hotel.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily's lip quivered, and in the irritating silence both Hubert and Mrs.
-Bentley saw that she was trying to overcome her passion. They fervently
-hoped she would succeed; for at that moment the servant was handing round
-the wine, and the time he took to accomplish this service seemed endless.
-He had filled the last glass, had handed round the dessert, <a
-name="213.png" class="pb"></a> and was preparing to leave the room when
-Emily said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'The hotel will suit you very well. You'll be free to see Hubert
-whenever you like.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert looked up quickly, hoping Mrs. Bentley would not answer, but
-before he could make a sign she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'What do you mean, Emily? I did not know that Hubert was going to
-London.'</p>
-
-<p>'You hardly expect me to believe that, do you?'</p>
-
-<p>The servant was still in the room; but no look of astonishment appeared
-on his face, and Hubert hoped he had not heard. An awful silence glowered
-upon the dinner-table. The moment the door closed Hubert said, turning
-angrily to Emily&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Really, I am quite surprised, Emily, that you should make such
-observations in the presence of servants! This has been going on quite long
-enough; you are making the house intolerable. I shall not be able to live
-here any longer.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily burst into a passionate flood of tears. She declared she was
-wretchedly miserable, and that she fully understood that Hubert had begun
-to regret that he had asked her to stay at Ashwood. Everything had been
-taken from her; every one was against her. Her <a name="214.png"
-class="pb"></a> sobs shook her frail little frame as if they would break
-it, and Hubert's heart was wrung at the sight of such genuine
-suffering.</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I assure you you are mistaken. We both love you very
-much.' He got up from his chair, and, putting his arm about her, besought
-her to dry her eyes; but she shook him passionately from her, and fled from
-the room.</p>
-
-<p>Three days after, Emily tore up one of her songs, because Mrs. Bentley
-had sung it without her leave. And so on and so on, week after week. No
-sooner was one quarrel allayed than signs of another began to appear.
-Hubert despaired. 'How is this to end?' he asked himself every day. Mrs.
-Bentley begged him to cancel her promise, and allow her to go. But that was
-impossible. He could not remain alone with Emily; if he left her she would
-not fail to believe that he had gone after her rival. The situation had
-become so tense that they ended by discussing these questions almost
-without reserve. To make matters worse, Emily had begun visibly to lose her
-health. There was neither colour in her cheeks nor light in her eyes; she
-hardly slept at all, and had grown more than ever like a little shadow. The
-doctor had been summoned, and, after prescribing a tonic, had advised quiet
-<a name="215.png" class="pb"></a> and avoidance of all excitement.
-Therefore Hubert and Mrs. Bentley agreed never to meet except when Emily
-was present, and then strove to speak as little as possible to each other.
-But the very fact of having to restrain themselves in looks, glances, and
-every slightest word&mdash;for Emily misinterpreted all things&mdash;whetted their
-appetites for each other's society.</p>
-
-<p>In the misery of his study, when he watched the sheet of paper, he often
-sought relief in remembrance of her sweet manner, and the happy morning he
-had spent in her companionship. What he had written under the direct
-influence of her inspiration still seemed to him to be less bad than the
-rest of his play; and he began to feel sure that, if ever this play were
-written, it would be written in the benign charm of her sweet
-encouragement, in the reposeful shadow of her presence. But that presence
-was forbidden him&mdash;that presence that seemed so necessary; and for what
-reason? Turning on the circumstances of his life, he raged against them,
-declaring that it would be folly to allow his very life's desire to be
-frittered away to gratify a young girl's caprice,&mdash;a caprice which in a few
-years she would laugh at. And whenever he was not thinking of his play, he
-remembered the charm of Mrs. Bentley's company, and the beneficent effect
-it had on his work. He had never <a name="216.png" class="pb"></a> known a
-woman he had liked so much, and he felt&mdash;he started at the thought, so like
-an inspiration did it seem to him&mdash;that the only possible solution of the
-present situation was his marriage with her. Once he was married, Emily
-would soon learn to forget him. They would take her up to London for the
-season; and, amid the healthy excitement of balls and parties, her girlish
-fancy would evaporate. No doubt she would meet again the young cavalry
-officer whose addresses she had received so coldly. She would be sure to
-meet him again&mdash;be sure to think him the most charming man in the world;
-they would marry, and she would make him the best possible wife. The
-kindest action they could do Emily would be to marry. There was nothing
-else to do, and they must do something, or else the girl would die. It
-seemed wonderful to Hubert that he had not thought of all this before. 'It
-is the very obvious solution of the problem,' he said; and his heart beat
-as he heard Mrs. Bentley's step in the corridor. It died away in the
-distance; but a few days after, when he heard it again, he jumped from his
-chair, and ran to the door. 'Come,' he said, 'I want to speak to you.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no, I beg of you!'</p>
-
-<p>'I must speak to you!' He laid his hand upon her <a name="217.png"
-class="pb"></a> arm, and said, 'I beg of you. I have something to say&mdash;it
-is of great importance. Come in.'</p>
-
-<p>They looked at each other a moment, and it seemed as if they could see
-into each other's souls. Then a look of yielding passed into her eyes, and
-she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Well, what is it?'</p>
-
-<p>The familiarity of the words struck her, and she saw by the kindling
-tenderness in his eyes that they had given him pleasure. She almost knew he
-was going to tell her that he loved her. He looked towards the open door,
-and, guessing his intention, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Don't shut it! Speak quickly. Remember that she may pass at any moment.
-Were she to find us together, she would suffer; it would be tears and
-reproaches. What you have to say to me is about her?'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course; we never speak of anything else. But we must not be
-overheard. I must shut the door.' She noticed a certain embarrassment in
-his manner. Suddenly relinquishing his intention to take her hands, he
-said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'This cannot go on; our lives are being made unbearable. You agree with
-me&mdash;do you not?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes,' she said, with a curious inquiring look in her eyes. 'You had
-better let me leave. It is the only way out of the difficulty.'</p>
-
-<a name="218.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'You know very well, Julia, that that is impossible.'</p>
-
-<p>It was the first time he had used her Christian name, and she knew now
-he was going to ask her to marry him. A frightened look passed into her
-face; she turned from him; he took her hands.</p>
-
-<p>'No, Julia,' he said; 'there is another and better way out of the
-difficulty. You will stop here&mdash;you will be my wife?' Reading the look of
-pain that had come into her eyes, he said, 'You will not refuse me? I want
-you&mdash;I can do nothing without you. If you leave me, I shall never be able
-to write my play; it can only be written under your influence. I love you,
-Julia!' She allowed him to draw her towards him, and then she broke
-away.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh,' she said, 'why do you say these things? You only make my task
-harder. You know that I cannot betray my friend. Why do you tempt me to do
-a dishonourable action?'</p>
-
-<p>'A dishonourable action! What do you mean? It is the only way to save
-her. Once we are married, she will forget. No doubt she will shed a few
-tears; but to save the body we must often lose a limb. It is even so.
-Things cannot go on as they are. We cannot watch her withering away under
-our very eyes; and that is what is actually happening. I have thought <a
-name="219.png" class="pb"></a> it all over, considered it from every point
-of view, and have come to the conclusion that&mdash;that, well, that we had
-better marry. You must have seen that I always liked you. I did not myself
-know how much until a few days ago. Say that I am not wholly disagreeable
-to you.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I will not listen to you! My conscience tells me plainly where my
-duty lies. Not for all the world will I play Emily false. I shudder to
-think of such a thing; it would be the basest ingratitude. I owe everything
-to her. When I hadn't a penny in the world, and when in my homelessness I
-wrote to Mr. Burnett, she pleaded in my favour, and decided him to take me
-as a companion. No, no! a thousand times no! Let go my hands. Do you not
-know what it is to be loyal?'</p>
-
-<p>'I hope I do. But, as I have explained, it is the only solution. The
-romantic attachments of young girls, unless nipped in the bud, often end
-fatally. Do you not see how ill she is looking? She is wearing her life
-away. We shall be acting in her best interests. Besides, she is not the
-only person to be considered. Do I not love you? Are you not the very woman
-whose influence, whose guidance, is necessary, so that I should succeed?
-Without your help I shall never <a name="220.png" class="pb"></a> write my
-play. A woman's influence is necessary to every undertaking. The greatest
-writers owe their best inspiration to&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Her heart is as closely set upon you as yours is upon your play.'</p>
-
-<p>'But,' cried Hubert, 'I do not love her! Under no circumstances would I
-marry her. That I swear to you. If she and I were alone on a desert
-island&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>Julia looked at him one moment doubtingly, inquiringly. Then she
-said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Hers is no evanescent fancy, but a passion that goes to the very roots
-of her nature, and will kill her if it be not satisfied.'</p>
-
-<p>'Or cut out in time.'</p>
-
-<p>'I must leave.'</p>
-
-<p>'That will not mend matters.'</p>
-
-<p>'My departure will, at all events, remove all cause for jealousy; and
-when I am gone you may learn to love her.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; that I swear is impossible!'</p>
-
-<p>'You very likely think so now; but I'm bound to give her every chance of
-winning you.'</p>
-
-<p>'I say again that that is impossible! I have never seen a woman except
-yourself I could marry. I tell you so: believe me as you like.... In this
-matter <a name="221.png" class="pb"></a> you are acting like a woman,&mdash;you
-allow your emotions and not your intellect to lead you. By acting thus, you
-are certainly sacrificing two lives&mdash;hers and mine. Of your own I do not
-speak, not knowing what is passing in your heart; but if by any chance you
-should care for me, you are adding your own happiness to the general
-holocaust.' Neither spoke again for some time.</p>
-
-<p>'Why should you not marry her?' Julia said, at the end of a long
-silence. 'Some people think her quite a pretty girl.'</p>
-
-<p>The lovers looked at each other and smiled sadly. And then, in pathetic
-phrases, Hubert tried to explain why he could never love Emily. He spoke of
-his age, and of difference of tastes,&mdash;he liked clever women. The
-conversation fell. At the end of a long silence, Julia said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'There is nothing for it but my departure, and the sooner the
-better.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are not in earnest? You are surely not in earnest?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, indeed I am.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then, if you go, you must take her with you. She cannot remain here
-alone with me. And even if she could, I could not live with her. Her folly
-has destroyed <a name="222.png" class="pb"></a> any liking I may have ever
-had for her. You'll have to take her with you.'</p>
-
-<p>'She would not come with me. I spoke to her once of a trip abroad.'</p>
-
-<p>'And she refused?'</p>
-
-<p>'She said she only wanted things to go on just as they are.'</p>
-
-<a name="223.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XVII</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">In</span> some trepidation Julia knocked.
-Receiving no reply, she opened the door, and her candle burnt in what a
-moment before must have been inky darkness. Emily lay on her bed&mdash;on the
-edge of it; and the only movement she made was to avert her eyes from the
-light. 'What! all alone in this darkness, Emily!... Shall I light your
-candles?' She had to repeat the question before she could get an
-answer.</p>
-
-<p>'No, thank you; I want nothing; I have no wish to see anything. I like
-the dark.'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you been asleep?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I have not.... Why do you come to torment me? It cannot matter to
-you whether I lie in the dark or the light. Oh, take that candle away! it
-is blinding me.' Julia put the candle on the washstand. Then full of pity
-for the grieving girl, she stood, her hand resting on the bed-rail.</p>
-
-<p>'Aren't you coming down to dinner, Emily? Come, <a name="224.png"
-class="pb"></a> let me pour out some water for you. When you have bathed
-your eyes&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't want any dinner.'</p>
-
-<p>'It will look very strange if you remain in your room the whole evening.
-You do not want to vex him, do you?'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose he is very angry with me. But I did not mean to vex him. Is
-he very angry?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, he is not angry at all; he is merely distressed. You distress him
-dreadfully when&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't know why I should distress him. I'm sure I don't mean to. You
-know more about it than I. You are always whispering together&mdash;talking
-about me.'</p>
-
-<p>'I assure you, Emily, you are mistaken. Mr. Price and I have no secrets
-whatever.'</p>
-
-<p>'Why should you tell me these falsehoods? They make me so
-miserable.'</p>
-
-<p>'Falsehoods, Emily! When did you ever know me to tell a falsehood?'</p>
-
-<p>'You say you have no secrets! Do you think I am blind? You think, I
-suppose, I did not see you showing him a ring? You took it off, too; and I
-suppose you gave it to him,&mdash;an engagement ring, very likely.'</p>
-
-<a name="225.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I lost a stone from my ring, and I asked Mr. Price if he would take the
-ring to London and have the stone replaced.... That is all. So you see how
-your imagination has run away with you.'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not answer. At last she said, breaking the silence
-abruptly&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Is he very angry? Has he gone to his study? Do you think he will come
-down to dinner?'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose he'll come down for dinner.'</p>
-
-<p>'Will you go and ask him?'</p>
-
-<p>'I hardly see how I can do that. He is very busy.... And if you would
-listen to any advice of mine, it would be to leave him to himself as much
-as possible for the present. He is so taken up with his play; I know he's
-most anxious about it.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is he? I don't know. He never speaks to me about it. I hate that play,
-and I hate to see him go up to that study! I cannot understand why he
-should trouble himself about writing plays; he doesn't want the money, and
-it can't be agreeable sitting up there all alone thinking.... It is easy to
-see that it only makes him unhappy. But you encourage him to go on with it.
-Oh yes, you do; there's no use saying you don't. You are always talking to
-him about it; you bring the conversation up. You think I don't see how <a
-name="226.png" class="pb"></a> you do it, but I do; and you like doing it,
-because then you have him all to yourself. I can't talk to him about that
-play; and I wouldn't if I could, for it only makes him unhappy. But you
-don't care whether he's unhappy or not; you only think of yourself.'</p>
-
-<p>'You surely don't believe what you are saying is true? To-morrow you
-will be sorry for what you have said. You cannot think that I would deceive
-you, Emily? Remember what friends we have been.'</p>
-
-<p>'I remember everything. You think I don't; but I do. And you think also
-that there's no reason why I should be miserable; but there is. Because you
-do not feel my misery, you think it doesn't exist. I daresay you think,
-too, that you are very good and kind; but you aren't. You think you deceive
-me; but you don't. I know all that is passing between you and Hubert. I
-know a great deal more than I can explain....'</p>
-
-<p>'But tell me, Emily, what is it you suspect? What do you accuse me
-of?'</p>
-
-<p>'I accuse you of nothing. Can't you understand that things may go wrong
-without it being any one's fault in particular?'</p>
-
-<p>Julia wondered how Emily could think so wisely. She seemed to have grown
-wiser in her grief. But <a name="227.png" class="pb"></a> grief helped her
-no further in her instinctive perception of the truth, and she resumed her
-puerile attack on her friend.</p>
-
-<p>'Nothing has gone well with me ever since you came here. I was
-disinherited; and I daresay you were glad, for you knew that if the money
-did not come to me it would go to Hubert, and I do know&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'What are you saying, Emily? I never heard of such wild accusations
-before! You know very well that I never set eyes on Mr. Price until he came
-down here.'</p>
-
-<p>'How should I know what you know or don't know? But I know that all my
-life every one has been plotting against me. And I cannot make out why. I
-never did harm to any one.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused. Emily flung herself back on the pillow. Not
-even a sob. The candle burned like a long yellow star in the shadows,
-yielding only sufficient light for Julia to see the outlines of a somewhat
-untidy room,&mdash;an old-fashioned mahogany wardrobe, cloudy and black, upon
-old-fashioned grey paper, some cardboard boxes, and a number of china
-ornaments, set out on a small table covered with a tablecloth in
-crewel-work.</p>
-
-<p>'I would do anything in the world for you, Emily. I am your best friend,
-and yet&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<a name="228.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I have no friend. I don't believe in friends. You think people are your
-friends, and then you find they are not.'</p>
-
-<p>'How can I convince you of the injustice of your suspicions?'</p>
-
-<p>'I see all plainly enough; it is fate, I suppose.... Selfishness. We all
-think of ourselves&mdash;we can't help it; and that's what makes life so
-miserable.... He would be a very good match. You have got him to like you.
-Perhaps you didn't intend to; but you have done it all the same.'</p>
-
-<p>'But, Emily dear, listen! There is no question of marriage between me
-and Mr. Price. If you will only have patience, things will come right in
-the end.'</p>
-
-<p>'For you, perhaps.'</p>
-
-<p>'Emily, Emily! ... You should try to understand things better.'</p>
-
-<p>'I feel them, even if I don't understand.'</p>
-
-<p>'Admit that you were wrong about the ring. Have I not convinced you that
-you were wrong?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not answer. But at the end of a long silence, in which she had
-been pursuing a different train of thought, she said, 'Then you mean that
-he has never asked you to marry him?'</p>
-
-<p>The directness of the question took Julia by surprise, <a name="229.png"
-class="pb"></a> and, falsehood being unnatural to her, she hesitated,
-hardly knowing what to answer. Her hesitation was only momentary; but in
-that moment there came up such a wave of pity for the grief-stricken girl
-that she lied for pity's sake, 'No, he never asked me to marry him. I
-assure you that he never did. If you do not believe me&mdash;&mdash;' As she was
-about to say, 'I will swear it if you like,' an irresponsible sensation of
-pride in her ownership of his love surged up through her, overwhelming her
-will, and she ended the sentence, 'I am very sorry, but I cannot help
-it.'</p>
-
-<p>The words were still well enough; it was in the accent that the truth
-transpired. And then yielding still further to the force which had
-subjugated her will, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I admit that we have talked about a great many things.' (Again she
-strove not to speak, but the words rose red-hot to her lips.) 'He has said
-that he would like to marry, but I should not think of accepting&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Then it is just as I thought!' Emily cried; 'he wants to get rid of
-me!'</p>
-
-<p>Julia was shocked and surprised at the depth of disgraceful vanity and
-cowardice which special circumstances had brought within her consciousness.
-The Julia Bentley of the last few moments was not the Julia <a
-name="230.png" class="pb"></a> Bentley she was accustomed to meet and
-interrogate, and she asked herself how she might exorcise the meanness that
-had so unexpectedly appeared in her. Should she pile falsehood on
-falsehood? She felt it would be cruel not to do so; but Emily said, 'He
-wants to marry to get rid of me, and not because he loves you.' Then it was
-hard to deny herself the pleasure of telling the whole truth; but she
-mastered her desire of triumph, and, actuated by nothing but sincerest love
-and pity, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, Emily dear, he never asked me to marry him; he does not love me at
-all! Why will you not believe me?'</p>
-
-<p>'Because I cannot!' she cried passionately. 'I only ask to be left
-alone.'</p>
-
-<p>'A little patience, Emily, and all will come right. Mr. Price does not
-want to get rid of you. You wrong him just as you wrong me. He has often
-said how much he likes you; indeed he has.' Although speaking from the
-bottom of her heart, it seemed to Julia that she was playing the part of a
-cruel, false woman, who was designingly plotting to betray a helpless girl;
-and not understanding why this was so, she was at once puzzled and
-confused. It seemed to her that she was being borne on in a wind of
-destiny, and her will <a name="231.png" class="pb"></a> seemed to beat
-vainly against it, like a bird's wings when a storm is blowing. She was
-conscious of a curious powerlessness; it surprised her, and she could not
-understand why she continued talking, so vain and useless did words seem to
-her&mdash;an idle patter. She continued&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'You think that I stand between you and Mr. Price. Now, I assure you
-that it is not so. I tell you I should refuse Mr. Price, even if he were to
-ask me to marry him, here, at this very moment. I pledge you my word on
-this. Give me your hand, Emily. You will not refuse it?' Emily gave her
-hand. 'It is quite ridiculous to promise, for he will never ask me; but I
-promise not to marry him even if he should ask me.' She gave the promise,
-determined to keep it; and yet she knew she would not keep it. She argued
-passionately with herself, a prey to an inward dread; for no matter how
-firmly she forced resolution upon resolution, they all seemed to melt in
-her soul like snow on a blazing fire. Then, determined to rid herself of a
-numb sensation of powerlessness, and achieve the end she desired, she said,
-'I'll tell you, Emily, what I'll do. I'll not stay here; I will go away.
-Let me go away, dear, and then it will be all right.'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no! you mustn't leave; I don't want you to <a name="232.png"
-class="pb"></a> leave. It would be said everywhere that I had you sent
-away.... You promise me not to leave?' Raising herself, Emily clung to
-Julia's arm, detaining her until she had extorted the desired promise.</p>
-
-<p>'Very well; I promise,' she said sadly. 'But I think you are wrong;
-indeed I do. I have always thought that "the only solution of the problem"
-was my departure.' Memory had betrayed her into Hubert's own phrase.</p>
-
-<p>'Why should you go? You think, I suppose, that I'm in love with Hubert?
-I'm not. All I want is for things to go on just the same&mdash;for us to be
-friends as we were before.'</p>
-
-<p>'Very well, Emily&mdash;very well.... But in the meantime you must not
-neglect your meals as you have been doing lately. If you don't take care,
-you'll lose your health and your looks. I have been noticing how thin you
-are looking.'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose you have told him that I am looking thin and ill.... Men like
-tall, big, healthy women like you&mdash;don't they?'</p>
-
-<p>'I see, Emily, that it is hopeless; every word one utters is
-misinterpreted. Dinner will be ready in a few minutes; or, if you like, I
-will dine up-stairs; and you and Mr. Price&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<a name="233.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'But is he coming down to dinner? I thought you said he had gone to his
-study; sometimes he dines there.'</p>
-
-<p>'I can tell you nothing about Mr. Price. I don't know whether he'll dine
-up-stairs or down.'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment a knock was heard at the door, and the servant announced
-that dinner was ready. 'Mr. Price has sent down word, ma'am, that he is
-very busy writing; he hopes you'll excuse him, and he'll be glad if you
-will send him his dinner up on a tray.'</p>
-
-<p>'Very well; I shall be down directly.'</p>
-
-<p>The slight interruption had sufficed to calm Julia's irritation, and she
-stood waiting for Emily. But seeing that she showed no signs of moving, she
-said, 'Aren't you coming down to dinner, Emily?' It was a sense of strict
-duty that impelled the question, for her heart sank at the prospect of
-spending the evening alone with the girl. But seeing the tears on Emily's
-cheeks, she sat down beside her, and said, 'Dearest Emily, if you would
-only confide in me!'</p>
-
-<p>'There's nothing to confide....'</p>
-
-<p>'You mustn't give way like this; you really mustn't. Come down and have
-some dinner.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is no use; I couldn't eat anything.'</p>
-
-<a name="234.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'He may come into the drawing-room in the course of the evening, and
-will be so disappointed and grieved to hear that you have not been
-down.'</p>
-
-<p>'No; he will spend the whole evening in his room; we shall not see him
-again.'</p>
-
-<p>'But if I go and ask him to come; if I tell him&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'No; do not speak to him about me; he'd only say that I was interfering
-with his work.'</p>
-
-<p>'That is unjust, Emily; he has never reproached you with interfering
-with his work. Shall I go and tell him that you won't come down because you
-think he is angry with you?'</p>
-
-<p>Ten minutes passed, and no answer could be obtained from Emily&mdash;only
-passionate and illusive refusals, denials, prayer to be left alone; and
-these mingled with irritating suggestions that Julia had better go at once,
-that Hubert might be waiting for her. But Julia bore patiently with her and
-did not leave her until Hubert sent to know why his dinner was delayed.</p>
-
-<p>Emily had begun to undress; and, tearing off her things, she hardly took
-more than five minutes to get into bed.</p>
-
-<p>'Shall I light a candle?' Julia asked before leaving.</p>
-
-<p>'No, thank you.'</p>
-
-<a name="235.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Shall I send you up some soup?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I could not touch it.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are not going to remain in the dark? Let me light a
-night-light?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, thank you; I like the dark.'</p>
-
-<a name="236.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XVIII</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Hubert</span> and Mrs. Bentley stood by the
-chimney-piece in the drawing-room, waiting for the doctor; they had left
-him with Emily, and stood facing each other absorbed in thought, when the
-door opened, and the doctor entered. Hubert said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'What do you think, Doctor? Is she seriously ill?'</p>
-
-<p>'There is nothing, so far as I can make out, organically the matter with
-her, but the system is running down. She is very thin and weak. I shall
-prescribe a tonic, but&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'But what, doctor?'</p>
-
-<p>'She seems to be suffering from extreme depression of spirits. Do you
-know of any secret grief&mdash;any love affair? At her age, anything of that
-sort fills the entire mind, and the consequences are often grave.'</p>
-
-<p>'And supposing it were so, what would be your advice? Change of air and
-scene?'</p>
-
-<p>'Certainly.'</p>
-
-<p>'Have you spoken to her on the subject?'</p>
-
-<a name="237.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Yes; but she says she will not leave Ashwood.'</p>
-
-<p>'We cannot send her away by force. What would you advise us to do?'</p>
-
-<p>'There's nothing to be done. We must hope for the best. There is no
-immediate cause for fear.... But, by the way, she looks as if she suffered
-from sleeplessness.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, she does; but she has been ordered chloral. Any harm in that?'</p>
-
-<p>'In her case, it is a necessity; but do you think she takes it?'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, she has been taking choral.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused; the doctor went over to the writing-table,
-wrote a prescription, made a few remarks, and took his leave, announcing
-his intention of returning that day fortnight.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert said, and his tone implied reference to some anterior
-conversation, 'We are powerless in this matter. You see we can do nothing.
-We only succeed in making ourselves unhappy; we do not change in anything.
-I am wretchedly unhappy!'</p>
-
-<p>'Believe me,' she said, raising her arms in a beautiful feminine
-movement, 'I do not wish to make you unhappy.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then why do you persist? Why do you refuse <a name="238.png"
-class="pb"></a> to take the only step that may lead us out of this
-difficulty?'</p>
-
-<p>'How can you ask me? Oh, Hubert, I did not think you could be so cruel!
-It would be a shameful action.'</p>
-
-<p>It was the first time she had used his Christian name, and his face
-changed expression.</p>
-
-<p>'I cannot,' she said, 'and I will not, and I do not understand how you
-can ask me&mdash;you who are so loyal, how can you ask me to be disloyal?'</p>
-
-<p>'Spare me your reproaches. Fate has been cruel. I have never told you
-the story of my life. I have suffered deeply; my pride has been humiliated,
-and I have endured hunger and cold; but those sufferings were light
-compared to this last misfortune.'</p>
-
-<p>She looked at him with sublime pity in her eyes. 'I do not conceal from
-you,' she said, 'that I love you very much. I, too, have suffered, and I
-had thought for one moment that fate had vouchsafed me happiness; but, as
-you would say&mdash;the irony of life.'</p>
-
-<p>'Julia, do not say you never will?'</p>
-
-<p>'We cannot look into the future. But this I can say&mdash;I will not do Emily
-any wrong, and so far as is in my power I will avoid giving her pain. There
-is only one way out of this difficulty. I must leave this house as soon as
-I can persuade her to let me go.'</p>
-
-<a name="239.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>The door opened; involuntarily the speakers moved apart; and though
-their faces and attitudes were strictly composed when Emily entered, she
-knew they had been standing closer together.</p>
-
-<p>'I'm afraid I'm interrupting you,' she said.</p>
-
-<p>'No, Emily; pray do not go away. We were only talking about you.'</p>
-
-<p>'If I were to leave every time you begin to talk about me, I should
-spend my life in my room. I daresay you have many faults to find. Let me
-hear all about your fresh discoveries.'</p>
-
-<p>It was a thin November day: leaves were whirling on the lawn, and at
-that moment one blew rustling down the window-pane. And, even as it, she
-seemed a passing thing. Her face was like a plate of fine white porcelain,
-and the deep eyes filled it with a strange and magnetic pathos; the
-abundant chestnut hair hung in the precarious support of a thin
-tortoiseshell; and there was something unforgetable in the manner in which
-her aversion for the elder woman betrayed itself&mdash;a mere nothing, and yet
-more impressive than any more obvious and therefore more vulgar expression
-of dislike would have been.</p>
-
-<p>'A little patience, Emily. You will not have me here much longer.'</p>
-
-<a name="240.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'I suppose that I am so disagreeable that you cannot live with me. Why
-should you go away?'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, you must not excite yourself. The doctor&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I want to know why she said she was going to leave. Has she been
-complaining about me to you? What is her reason for wanting to go?'</p>
-
-<p>'We do not get on together as we used to&mdash;that is all, Emily. I can
-please you no longer.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is not my fault if we do not get on. I don't see why we shouldn't,
-and I do not want you to go.'</p>
-
-<p>'Emily, dear, everything shall be as you like it.'</p>
-
-<p>The girl looked at him with the shy, doubting look of an animal that
-would like, and still does not dare, to go to the beckoning hand. How frail
-seemed the body in the black dress! and how thin the arms in the black
-sleeves! Hubert took the little hand in his. At his touch a look of content
-and rest passed into her eyes, and she yielded herself as the leaf yields
-to the wind. She was all his when he chose. Mrs. Bentley left the room;
-and, seeing her go, a light of sudden joy illuminated the thin, pale face;
-and when the door closed, and she was alone with him, the bleak, unhappy
-look, which had lately grown strangely habitual to her, faded out of her
-face and eyes. He fetched <a name="241.png" class="pb"></a> her shawl, and
-took her hand again in his, knowing that by so doing he made her happy. He
-could not refuse her the peace from pain that these attentions brought her,
-though he would have held himself aloof from all women but one. She knew
-the truth well enough; but they who suffer much think only of the cessation
-of pain. He wondered at the inveigling content that introduced itself into
-her voice, face, and gesture. Settling herself comfortably on the sofa, she
-said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Now tell me what the doctor said. Did he say I would soon recover? Did
-he say that I was very bad? Tell me all.'</p>
-
-<p>'He said that you ought to have a change&mdash;that you should go south
-somewhere.'</p>
-
-<p>'And you agree with him that I ought to go away?'</p>
-
-<p>'Is he not the best judge?&mdash;the doctor's orders!'</p>
-
-<p>'Then you, too, have learnt to hate me. You, too, want to send me
-away?'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Emily, I only want to do as you like. You asked me what the
-doctor said, and I told you.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert got up and walked aside. He passed his hand across his eyes. He
-could hardly contain himself; the emotion that discussion with this sick
-girl <a name="242.png" class="pb"></a> caused him went to his head. She
-looked at him curiously, watching his movement, and he failed to understand
-what pleasure it could give her to have him by her side, knowing, as she
-clearly did, that his heart was elsewhere. Turning suddenly, he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'But tell me, Emily, how are you feeling? You are, after all, the best
-judge.'</p>
-
-<p>'I feel rather weak. I should get strong enough if&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>She paused, as if waiting for Hubert to ask her to finish the sentence.
-But he hurriedly turned the conversation.</p>
-
-<p>'The doctor said you looked as if you had not had any sleep for several
-nights. I told him that that was strange, for you were taking chloral.'</p>
-
-<p>'I sleep well enough,' she said. 'But sometimes life seems so sad, that
-I do not think I shall be able to bear with it any longer. You do not know
-how unfortunate I have been. When I was a child, father and mother used to
-quarrel always, and I was the only child. That was why Mr. Burnett asked me
-to come and live at Ashwood. I came at first on a visit; and when father
-and mother died, he said he wished to adopt me. I thought he loved me; but
-his love was <a name="243.png" class="pb"></a> only selfishness. No one has
-ever loved me. I feel so utterly alone in this world&mdash;that is why I am
-unhappy.'</p>
-
-<p>Her eyes filled with tears, and at the sight of her tears Hubert's
-feelings were overwrought, and again he had to walk aside. He would give
-her all things; but she was dying for him, and he could not save her. No
-longer was there any disguisement between them. The words they uttered were
-as nothing, so clearly did the thought shine out of their eyes, 'I am dying
-of love for you,' and then the answer, 'I know that is so, and I cannot
-help it.' Her whole soul was spoken in her eyes, and he felt that his eyes
-betrayed him equally plainly. They stood in a sort of mental nakedness. The
-woman no longer sought for words to cover herself with; the man did, but he
-did not find them. They had not spoken for some time; they had been
-thinking of each other. At last she said, and with the querulous perversity
-of the sick&mdash;-</p>
-
-<p>'But even if I wished to go abroad, with whom could I go?'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert fell into the trap, and, noticing the sudden brightness in his
-eyes, a cloud of disappointment shadowed hers. 'Of course, with Mrs.
-Bentley. I assure you, my dear Emily, that you&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<a name="244.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'No, no, I am not mistaken! She hates me, and I cannot bear her. It is
-she who is making me ill.'</p>
-
-<p>'Hate you! Why should she hate you?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not reply. Hubert watched her, noticing the pallor of her
-cheek, so entirely white and blue, hardly a touch of warm colour anywhere,
-even in the shadow of the heavy hair.</p>
-
-<p>'I would give anything to see you friends again.'</p>
-
-<p>'That is impossible! I can never be friends with Julia as I once was.
-She has&mdash;&mdash; No, never can we be friends again. But why do you always take
-her part against me? That is what grieves me most. If only you
-thought&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Emily dear, these are but idle fancies. You are mistaken.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation fell. The girl lay quite still, her hands clasped
-across the shawl, her little foot stretched beyond the limp black dress,
-the hem of which fell over the edge of the grey sofa. Hubert sat by her on
-a low chair, and he looked into the fire, whose light wavered over the
-walls, now and again bringing the face of one of the pictures out of the
-darkness. The wind whined about the windows. Then, speaking as if out of a
-dream, Emily said&mdash;</p>
-
-<a name="245.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Julia and I can never be friends again&mdash;that is impossible.'</p>
-
-<p>'But what has she done?' Hubert asked incautiously, regretting his words
-as soon as he had uttered them.</p>
-
-<p>'What has she done?' she said, looking at him curiously. 'Well, one
-thing, she has got it reported that&mdash;that I am in love with you, and that
-that is the reason of my illness.'</p>
-
-<p>'I am sure she never said any such thing. You are entirely mistaken.
-Mrs. Bentley is incapable of such wickedness.'</p>
-
-<p>'A woman, when she is jealous, will say anything. If she did not say it,
-can you tell me how it got about?'</p>
-
-<p>'I don't believe any one ever said such a thing.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, lots have said so&mdash;things come back to me. Julia always was
-jealous of me. She cannot bear me to speak to you. Have you not noticed how
-she follows us? Do you think she would have left the room just now if she
-could have helped it?'</p>
-
-<p>'If you think this is so, had she not better leave?'</p>
-
-<p>Emily did not answer at once. Motionless she lay on the sofa, looking at
-the grey November day with vague eyes that bespoke an obsession of
-hallucination. <a name="246.png" class="pb"></a> Suddenly she said, 'I do
-not want her to go away. She would spread a report that I was jealous of
-her, and had asked you to send her away. No; it would not be wise to send
-her away. Besides,' she said, fixing her eyes, now full of melancholy
-reproach, 'you would like her to remain.'</p>
-
-<p>'I have said before, Emily, and I assure you I am speaking the truth, I
-want you to do what you like. Say what you wish to be done, and it shall be
-done.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is that really true? I thought no one cared for me. You must care for
-me a little to speak like that.'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course I care for you, Emily.'</p>
-
-<p>'I sometimes think you might have if it had not been for that play; for,
-of course, I'm not clever, and cannot discuss it with you.... Julia, I
-suppose, can&mdash;that is the reason why you like her. Am I not right?'</p>
-
-<p>'Mrs. Bentley is a clever woman, who has read a great deal, and I like
-to talk an act over with her before I write it.'</p>
-
-<p>'Is that all? Then why do people say you are going to marry her?'</p>
-
-<p>'But nobody ever said so.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh yes, they have. Is it true?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, Emily; it is not true.'</p>
-
-<a name="247.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Are you quite sure?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, quite sure.'</p>
-
-<p>'If that is so,' she said, turning her eyes on Hubert, and looking as if
-she could see right down into his soul, 'I shall get well very soon. Then
-we can go on just the same; but if you married her, I&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I what?'</p>
-
-<p>'Nothing! I feel quite happy now. I did not want you to marry her. I
-could not bear it. It would be like having a step-mother&mdash;worse, for she
-would not have me here at all; she would drive me away.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert shook his head.</p>
-
-<p>'You don't know Julia as well as I do. However, it is no use discussing
-what is not going to be. You have been very nice to-day. If you would be
-always nice, as you are to-day, I should soon get well.'</p>
-
-<p>Her pale profile seemed very sharp in the fading twilight, and her
-delicate arms and thin bosom were full of the charm and fascination of
-deciduous things. She turned her face and looked at Hubert. 'You have made
-me very happy. I am content.'</p>
-
-<p>He was afraid to look back at her, lest she should, in her subtle,
-wilful manner, read the thought that was passing in his soul. Even now she
-seemed to read it. She seemed conscious of his pity for her. So little <a
-name="248.png" class="pb"></a> would give her happiness, and that little
-was impossible. His heart was irreparably another's. But though Emily's
-eyes seemed to know all, they seemed to say, 'What matter? I regret
-nothing, only let things remain as they are.' And then her voice said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I think I could sleep a little; happiness has brought me sleep. Don't
-go away. I shall not be asleep long.' She looked at him, and dozed, and
-then fell asleep. Hubert waited till her breathing grew deeper; then he
-laid the hand he held in his by her side, and stole on tiptoe from the
-room.</p>
-
-<p>The strain of the interview had become too intense; the house was
-unbearable. He went into the air. The November sky was drawing into wintry
-night; the grey clouds darkened, clinging round the long plain,
-overshadowing it, blotting out colour, leaving nothing but the severe green
-of the park, and the yellow whirling of dishevelled woods.</p>
-
-<p>'I must,' he said to himself, 'think no more about it. I shall go mad if
-I do. Nature will find her own solution. God grant that it may be a
-merciful one! I can do nothing.' And to escape from useless consideration,
-to release his overwrought brain, he hastened his steps, extending his walk
-through the farthest woods. As he approached the lodge gate he came upon <a
-name="249.png" class="pb"></a> Mrs. Bentley. She stood, her back turned
-from him, leaning on the gate, her thoughts lost in the long darkness of
-autumnal fields and woods.</p>
-
-<p>'Julia!'</p>
-
-<p>'You have left Emily. How did you leave her?'</p>
-
-<p>'She is fast asleep on the sofa. She fell asleep. Then why should I
-remain? The house was unbearable. She went to sleep, saying she felt very
-happy.'</p>
-
-<p>'Really! What induced such a change in her? Did you&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I did not ask her to marry me; but I was able to tell her that I
-was not going to marry you, and that seemed entirely to satisfy her.'</p>
-
-<p>'Did she ask you?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes. And when I told her I was not, she said that that was all she
-wanted to know&mdash;that she would soon get well now. How we human beings
-thrive in each other's unhappiness!'</p>
-
-<p>'Quite true, and we have been reproaching ourselves for our
-selfishness.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, and hers is infinitely greater. She is quite satisfied not to be
-happy herself, so long as she can make sure of our unhappiness. And what is
-so strange is her utter unconsciousness of her own fantastic and hardly
-conceivable selfishness.... It is astonishing!'</p>
-
-<a name="250.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'She is very young, and the young are naturally egotistic.'</p>
-
-<p>'Possibly. Still, it is hardly more agreeable to encounter. Come, let's
-go for a walk; and, above all things, let's talk no more about Emily.'</p>
-
-<p>The roads were greasy, and the hedges were torn and worn with incipient
-winter, and when they dipped the town appeared, a reddish-brown mass in the
-blue landscape. Hubert thought of his play and his love; but not
-separately&mdash;they seemed to him now as one indissoluble, indivisible thing;
-and he told her that he never would be able to write it without her
-assistance. That she might be of use to him in his work was singularly
-sweet to hear, and the thought reached to the end of her heart, causing her
-to smile sadly, and argue vainly, and him to reply querulously. They walked
-for about a mile; and then, wearied with sad expostulation, the
-conversation fell, and at the end of a long silence Julia said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'I think we had better turn back.'</p>
-
-<p>The suggestion filled Hubert's heart with rushing pain, and he
-answered&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Why should we return? I cannot go back to that girl. Oh, the miserable
-life we are leading!'</p>
-
-<p>'What can we do? We must go back; we cannot <a name="251.png"
-class="pb"></a> live in a tent by the wayside. We have no tent to set
-up.'</p>
-
-<p>'Come to London, and be my wife.'</p>
-
-<p>'No,' she said; 'that is impossible. Let us not speak of it.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert did not answer; and, turning their faces homeward, they walked
-some way in silence. Suddenly Hubert said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'No; it is impossible. I cannot return. There is no use. I'm at the end
-of my tether. I cannot.'</p>
-
-<p>She looked at him in alarm.</p>
-
-<p>'Hubert,' she said, 'this is folly! I cannot return without you.'</p>
-
-<p>'You ruin my life; you refuse me the only happiness. I'm more wretched
-than I can tell you!'</p>
-
-<p>'And I! Do you think that I'm not wretched?' She raised her face to his;
-her eyes were full of tears. He caught her in his arms, and kissed her. The
-warm touch of her lips, the scent of her face and hair, banished all but
-desire of her.</p>
-
-<p>'You must come with me, Julia. I shall go mad if you don't. I can care
-for no one but you. All my life is in you now. You know I cannot love that
-girl, and we cannot continue in this wretched life. There is no sense in
-it; it is a voluntary, senseless martyrdom!'</p>
-
-<a name="252.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Hubert, do not tempt me to be disloyal to my friend. It is cruel of
-you, for you know I love you. But no, nothing shall tempt me. How can I? We
-do not know what might happen. The shock might kill her. She might do away
-with herself.'</p>
-
-<p>'You must come with me,' said Hubert, now completely lost in his
-passion. 'Nothing will happen. Girls do not do away with themselves; girls
-do not die of broken hearts. Nothing happens in these days. A few more
-tears will be shed, and she will soon become reconciled to what cannot be
-altered. A year or so after, we will marry her to a nice young man, and she
-will settle down a quiet mother of children.'</p>
-
-<p>'Perhaps you are right.'</p>
-
-<p>An empty fly, returning to the town, passed them. The fly-man raised his
-whip.</p>
-
-<p>'Take you to the railway station in ten minutes!'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert spoke quietly; nevertheless there was a strange nervousness in
-his eyes when he said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Fate comes to help me; she offers us the means of escape. You will not
-refuse, Julia?'</p>
-
-<p>Her upraised face was full of doubt and pain, and she was perplexed by
-the fly-man's dull eyes, his starved horse, his ramshackle vehicle, the wet
-road, the leaden sky. It was one of those moments when the <a
-name="253.png" class="pb"></a> familiar appears strange and grotesque.
-Then, gathering all her resolution, she said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'No, no; it is impossible! Come back, come back.'</p>
-
-<p>He caught her arm: quietly and firmly he led her across the road. 'You
-must listen to me.... We are about to take a decisive step. Are you sure
-that&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no, Hubert, I cannot; let us return home.'</p>
-
-<p>'I go back to Ashwood! If I did, I should commit suicide.'</p>
-
-<p>'Don't speak like that.... Where will you go?'</p>
-
-<p>'I shall travel.... I shall visit Italy and Greece.... I shall live
-abroad.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are not serious?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, I am, Julia. That cab may not take both, but it certainly will
-take one of us away from Ashwood, and for ever.'</p>
-
-<p>'Take you to Southwater, sir&mdash;take you to the station in ten minutes,'
-said the fly-man, pulling in his horse. A zig-zag fugitive thought passed:
-why did the fly-man speak of taking them to the station? How was it that he
-knew where they wanted to go? They stopped and wondered. The poor horse's
-bones stood out in strange projections, the round-shouldered little <a
-name="254.png" class="pb"></a> fly-man sat grinning on his box, showing
-three long yellow fangs. The vehicle, the horse, and the man, his arm
-raised in questioning gesture, appeared in strange silhouette upon the grey
-clouds, assuming portentous aspect in their tremulous and excited
-imaginations. 'Take you to Southwater in ten minutes!' The voice of the
-fly-man sounded hard, grating, and derisive in their ears.</p>
-
-<p>He had stopped in the middle of the road, and they walked slowly past,
-through a great puddle, which drenched their feet.</p>
-
-<p>'Get in, Julia. Shall I open the door?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no; think of Emily. I cannot, Hubert,&mdash;I cannot; it would kill
-her.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation paused, and in a long silence they wondered if the
-fly-man had heard. Then they walked several yards listening to the tramp of
-the hoofs, and then they heard the fly-man strike his horse with the whip.
-The animal shuffled into a sort of trot, and as the carriage passed them
-the fly-man again raised his arm and again repeated the same phrase, 'Drive
-you to the station in ten minutes!' The carriage was her temptation, and
-Julia hoped the man would linger no longer. For the promise she had given
-to Emily lay like a red-hot coal upon her heart; its fumes rose to <a
-name="255.png" class="pb"></a> her head, and there were times when she
-thought they would choke her, and she grew so sick with the pain of
-self-denial that she could have thrown herself down in the wet grass on the
-roadside, and laid her face on the cold earth for relief. Would nothing
-happen? What madness! Night was coming on, and still they followed the road
-to Southwater. Rain fell in heavy drops.</p>
-
-<p>'We shall get wet,' she murmured, as if she were answering the fly-man,
-who had said again, 'Drive you to the station in ten minutes!' She hated
-the man for his persistency.</p>
-
-<p>'Say you will come with me!' Hubert whispered; and all the while the
-rain came down heavier.</p>
-
-<p>'No, no, Hubert.... I cannot; I promised Emily that I never would. I am
-going back.'</p>
-
-<p>'Then we must say good-bye. I will not go back.'</p>
-
-<p>'You don't mean it. You don't really intend me to go back to Emily and
-tell her?... She will not believe me; she will think I have sent you away
-to gain my own end. Hubert, you mustn't leave me ... and in all this wet.
-See how it rains! I shall never be able to get home alone.'</p>
-
-<p>'I will drive you on as far as the lodge-gate; farther than the lodge I
-will not go. Nothing in the world shall tempt me to pass it.'</p>
-
-<a name="256.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>At a sign from Hubert the little fly-man scrambled down from his box. He
-was a little old man, almost hunchbacked, with small mud-coloured eyes and
-a fringe of white beard about his sallow, discoloured face. He was dressed
-in a pale yellow jacket and waistcoat, and they both noticed that his
-crooked little legs were covered with a pair of pepper-and-salt trousers.
-They felt sure he must have overheard a large part of their conversation,
-for as he opened the carriage door he grinned, showing his three yellow
-fangs.... His appearance was not encouraging. Julia wished he were
-different, and then she looked at Hubert. She longed to throw herself into
-his arms and weep. But at that moment the heavens seemed to open, and the
-rain came down like a torrent, thick and fast, splashing all along the road
-in a million splashes.</p>
-
-<p>'Horrible weather, sir; shan't be long a-takin' you to Southwater. What
-part of the town be yer going to&mdash;the railway station?'</p>
-
-<p>Julia still hesitated. The rain beat on their faces, and when some
-chilling drops rolled down her neck she instinctively sought shelter in the
-carriage.</p>
-
-<p>'Drive me to the station as fast as you can. Catch the half-past five to
-London, and I'll give you five shillings.'</p>
-
-<a name="257.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>The leather thong sounded on the starved animal's hide, the crazy
-vehicle rocked from side to side, and the wet country almost disappeared in
-the darkness. Hedges and fields swept past them in faintest outline, here
-and there a blurred mass, which they recognised as a farm building. His arm
-was about her, and she heard him murmur over and over again&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Dearest Julia, you are what I love best in the world.'</p>
-
-<p>The words thrilled her a little, but all the while she saw Emily's eyes
-and heard her voice.</p>
-
-<p>Hubert, however, was full of happiness&mdash;the sweet happiness of the
-quiet, docile creature that has at last obtained what it loves.</p>
-
-<a name="258.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XIX</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Emily</span> awoke shivering; the fire had gone
-out, the room was in darkness, and the house seemed strange and lonely. She
-rang the bell, and asked the servant if he had seen Mr. Price. Mr. Price
-had gone out late in the afternoon, and had not come in. Where was Mrs.
-Bentley? Mrs. Bentley had gone out earlier in the afternoon, and had not
-come in.</p>
-
-<p>She suspected the truth at once. They had gone to London to be married.
-The servant lighted a candle, made up the fire, and asked if she would wait
-dinner. Emily made no answer, but sat still, her eyes fixed, looking into
-space. The man lingered at the door. At that moment her little dog bounded
-into the room, and, in a paroxysm of delight, jumped on his mistress's lap.
-She took him in her arms and kissed him, and this somewhat reassured the
-alarmed servant, who then thought it was no more than one of Miss Emily's
-queer ways. Dandy licked his mistress's face, and rubbed his rough head
-against her shoulder. He <a name="259.png" class="pb"></a> seemed more than
-usually affectionate that evening. Suddenly she caught him up in her arms,
-and kissed him passionately. 'Not even for your sake, dearest Dandy, can I
-bear with it any longer! We are all very selfish, and it is selfish of me
-to leave you, but I cannot help it.' Then a doubt crossed her mind, and she
-raised her head and listened to it. It seemed difficult to believe that he
-had told her a falsehood&mdash;cruel, wicked falsehood&mdash;he who had been so kind.
-And yet&mdash;&mdash; Ah! yes, she knew well enough that it was all true; something
-told her so. The lancinating pain of doubt passed away, and she remained
-thinking of the impossibility of bearing any longer with the life.</p>
-
-<p>An hour passed, and the servant came with the news that Mr. Price and
-Mrs. Bentley had gone to London; they had taken the half-past five train.
-'Yes,' she said, 'I know they have.' Her voice was calm. There was a
-strange hollow ring in it, and the servant wondered. A few minutes after,
-dinner was announced; and to escape observation and comment she went into
-the dining-room, tasted the soup, and took a slice of mutton on her plate.
-She could not eat it. She gave it to Dandy. It was the last time she should
-feed him. How hungry he was! She <a name="260.png" class="pb"></a> hoped he
-would not care to eat it; he would not if he knew she was going to leave
-him.</p>
-
-<p>In the drawing-room he insisted on being nursed; and alone, amid the
-faded furniture, watched over by the old portraits, her pale face fixed and
-her pale hands clasping her beloved dog, she sat thinking, brooding over
-the unhappiness, the incurable unhappiness, of her little life. She was
-absorbed in self, and did not rail against Hubert, or even Julia. Their
-personalities had somehow dropped out of her mind, and merely represented
-forces against which she found herself unable any longer to contend. Nor
-was she surprised at what had happened. There had always been in her some
-prescience of her fate. She and unhappiness had always seemed so
-inseparable, that she had never found it difficult to believe that this
-last misfortune would befall her. She had thought it over, and had decided
-that it would be unendurable to live any longer, and had borne many a
-terrible insomnia so that she might collect sufficient chloral to take her
-out of her misery; and now, as she sat thinking, she remembered that she
-had never, never been happy. Oh! the miserable evenings she used to spend,
-when a child, between her father and mother, who could not agree&mdash;why, she
-never understood. But she used <a name="261.png" class="pb"></a> to have to
-listen to her mother addressing insulting speeches to her father in a calm,
-even voice that nothing could alter; and, though both were dead and years
-divided her from that time, the memory survived, and she could see it all
-again&mdash;that room, the very paper on the wall, and her father being
-gradually worked up into a frenzy.</p>
-
-<p>When she was left an orphan, Mr. Burnett had adopted her, and she
-remembered the joy of coming to Ashwood. She had thought to find happiness
-there; but there, as at home, fate had gone against her, and she was hardly
-eighteen when Mr. Burnett had asked her to marry him. She had loved that
-old man, but he had not loved her; for when she had refused to marry him he
-had broken all his promises and left her penniless, careless of what might
-become of her. Then she had given her whole heart to Julia, and Julia, too,
-had deceived her. And had she not loved Hubert?&mdash;no one would ever know how
-much; she did not know herself,&mdash;and had he not lied to her? Oh, it was
-very cruel to deceive a poor little girl in this heartless way! There was
-no heart in the world, that was it&mdash;and she was all heart; and her heart
-had been trampled on ever since she could remember. And when they came back
-they would revenge themselves <a name="262.png" class="pb"></a> upon
-her&mdash;insult her with their happiness; perhaps insist on sending her
-away.</p>
-
-<p>Dandy drowsed on her lap. The servant brought in the tea, and when he
-returned to the kitchen he said he had never seen any one look so
-ghost-like as Miss Emily. The clock ticked loudly in the silence of the old
-room, the hands moving slowly towards ten. She waited for the hour to
-strike; it was then that she usually went to bed. Her thoughts moved as in
-a nightmare; and paramount in this chaotic mass of sensation was an acute
-sense of the deception that had been practised on her; with the
-consciousness, now firm and unalterable, that it had become impossible for
-her to live. When the clock struck she got up from her chair, and the
-movement seemed to react on her brain; her thoughts unclouded, and she went
-up-stairs thinking clearly of her love of this old house. The old gentleman
-in the red coat, his hand on his sword, looked on her benignly; and the
-lady playing the spinet smiled as sweetly as was her wont. Emily held up
-the candle to the picture of the windmill. She had always loved that
-picture, and the sad thought came that she should never see it again.
-Dandy, who had galloped up-stairs, stood looking through the banisters,
-wagging his tail.</p>
-
-<a name="263.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>The moment she got into her room she wrote the following note: 'I have
-taken an overdose of chloral. My life was too miserable to be borne any
-longer. I forgive those who have caused my unhappiness, and I hope they
-will forgive me any unhappiness I have caused them.' They were nothing to
-her now; they were beyond her hate, and the only pang she felt was parting
-with her beloved Dandy. There he stood looking at her, standing on the edge
-of the bed, waiting for her to cover him up and put him to sleep in his own
-corner. 'Yes, Dandy, in a moment, dear&mdash;have patience.' She looked round
-the little room, and, remembering all that she had suffered there, thought
-that the walls must be saturated with grief, like a sponge.</p>
-
-<p>It was a common thing at that time for her to stand before the glass and
-address such words as these to herself: 'My poor girl, how I pity you, how
-I pity you!' And now, looking at herself very sadly, she said, 'My poor
-girl, I shall never pity you any more!' Having hung up her dress, she
-fetched a chair and took various doses of chloral out of the hollow top of
-her wardrobe, where she had hidden things all her life&mdash;sweets, novels,
-fireworks. They more than half-filled the tumbler; and, looking at the <a
-name="264.png" class="pb"></a> sticky, white liquid, she thought with
-repugnance of drinking so much of it. But, wanting to make quite sure of
-death, she resolved to take it all, and she undressed quickly. She was very
-cold when she got into bed. Then a thought struck her, and she got out of
-bed to add a postscript to her letter. 'I have only one request to make. I
-hope Dandy will always be taken care of.' Surprised that she had not
-wrapped him up and told him he was to go to sleep, the dog stood on the
-edge of the bed, watching her so earnestly that she wondered if he knew
-what she was going to do. 'No, you don't know, dear&mdash;do you? If you did,
-you wouldn't let me do it; you'd bark the house down, I know you would, my
-own darling.' Clasping him to her breast, she smothered him with kisses,
-then put him away in his corner, covering him over for the night.</p>
-
-<p>She felt neither grief nor fear. Through much suffering, thought and
-sensation were, to a great extent, dead in her; and, in a sort of emotive
-numbness, she laid her candlestick in its usual place on the chair by her
-bedside; and, sitting up in bed, her night-dress carefully buttoned,
-holding the tumbler half-filled with chloral, she tried to take a
-dispassionate survey of her life. She thought of what she had <a
-name="265.png" class="pb"></a> endured, and what she would have to endure
-if she did not take it. Then she felt she must go, and without hesitation
-drank off the chloral. She placed the tumbler by the candlestick, and lay
-down, remembering vaguely that a long time ago she had decided that suicide
-was not wrong in itself. The last thing she remembered was the clock
-striking eleven.</p>
-
-<p>For half an hour she slept like stone. Then her eyes opened, and they
-told of sickness now in motion within her. And, strangely enough, through
-the overpowering nausea rising from her stomach to her brain, the thought
-that she was not going to die appeared perfectly clear, and with it a sense
-of disappointment; she would have to begin it all over again. It was with
-great difficulty that she struck a match and lighted a candle. It seemed
-impossible to get up. At last she managed to slip her legs out of bed, and
-found she could stand, and through the various assaults of retching she
-thought of the letter: it must be destroyed; and, leaning in the corner
-against the wall and the wardrobe, she tried to recover herself. A dull,
-deep sleep was pressing on her brain, and she thought she would never be
-able to cross the room to where the letter was. Dandy looked out of his
-rug; she caught sight of his bright eyes.</p>
-
-<a name="266.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>On cold and shaky feet she attempted to make her way towards the letter;
-but the room heaved up at her, and, fearing she should fall, and knowing if
-she did that she would not be able to regain her feet, she clung to the
-toilette-table. She must destroy that letter: if it were found, they would
-watch her; and, however impossible her life might become, she would not be
-able to escape from it. This consideration gave her strength for a final
-effort. She tore the letter into very small pieces, and then, clinging to a
-chair, strove to grasp the rail of the bed; but the bed rolled worse than
-any ship. Making a supreme effort, she got in; and then, neither dreams nor
-waking thoughts, but oblivion complete. Hours and hours passed, and when
-she opened her eyes her maid stood over the bed, looking at her.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, miss, you looked so tired and ill that I didn't wake you. You do
-seem poorly, miss. It is nearly two o'clock. Should you like to sleep a
-little longer, or shall I bring you up some breakfast?'</p>
-
-<p>'No, no, no, thank you. I couldn't touch anything. I'm feeling wretched;
-but I'll get up.'</p>
-
-<p>The maid tried to dissuade her; but Emily got out of bed, and allowed
-herself to be dressed. She was very weak&mdash;so weak that she could hardly
-stand up <a name="267.png" class="pb"></a> at the washstand; and the maid
-had to sponge her face and neck. But when she had drunk a cup of tea and
-eaten a little piece of toast, she said she felt better, and was able to
-walk into the drawing-room. She thought no more of death, nor of her
-troubles; thought drowned in her; and in a passive, torpid state she sat
-looking into the fire till dinner-time, hardly caring to bestow a casual
-caress on Dandy, who seemed conscious of his mistress's neglect, for, in
-his sly, coaxing way, he sometimes came and rubbed himself against her
-feet. She went into the dining-room, and the servant was glad to see that
-she finished her soup, and, though she hardly tasted it, she finished a
-wing of a chicken, and also the glass of wine which the man pressed upon
-her. Half an hour after, when he brought out the tea, he found her sitting
-on her habitual chair nursing her dog, and staring into the fire so
-drearily that her look frightened him, and he hesitated before he gave her
-the letter which had just come up from the town; but it was marked
-'Immediate.'</p>
-
-<p>When he left the room she opened it. It was from Mrs. Bentley:&mdash;</p>
-
-<blockquote>
-
-<p>'<span class="small-caps">Dearest Emily</span>,&mdash;I know that Hubert told
-you that he was not going to marry me. He thought he was not, <a
-name="268.png" class="pb"></a> for I had refused to marry him; but a short
-time after we met in the park quite accidentally, and&mdash;well, fate took the
-matter out of our hands, and we are to be married to-morrow. Hubert insists
-on going to Italy, and I believe we shall remain there two months. We have
-made arrangements for your aunt to live with you until we come back; and
-when we do come back, I hope all the little unpleasantnesses which have
-marred our friendship for this last month or two will be forgotten. So far
-as I am concerned, nothing shall be left undone to make you happy. Your
-will shall be law at Ashwood so long as I am there. If you would like to
-join us in Italy, you have only to say the word. We shall be delighted to
-have you.'</p> </blockquote>
-
-<p>Emily could read no more. 'Join them in Italy!' She dashed the letter
-into the fire, and an intense hatred of them both pierced her heart and
-brain. It was the kiss of Judas. Oh, those hateful, lying words! To live
-here with her aunt until they came back, to wait here quietly until she
-returned in triumph with him&mdash;him who had been all the world to her. Oh no;
-that was not possible. Death, death&mdash;escape she must. But how? She had no
-more chloral. Suddenly she thought of the lake. 'Yes, yes; the lake, the
-lake!' And then a keen, swift, passionate longing for death, such as she
-had not felt at all the night before, came upon her. There was the
-knowledge <a name="269.png" class="pb"></a> too that by killing herself she
-would revenge herself on those who had killed her. She was just conscious
-that her suicide would have this effect, but hardly a trace of such
-intention appeared in the letter she wrote; it was as melancholy and as
-brief as the letter she had torn up, and ended, like it, with a request
-that Dandy should be well looked after. She had only just directed the
-envelope when she heard the servant coming to take away the tea-things. She
-concealed the letter; and when his steps died away in the corridor and the
-house-door closed, she knew she could slip out unobserved. Instinctively
-she thought of her hat and jacket, and, without a shudder, remembered she
-would not need them. She sped down the pathway through the shadow of the
-firs.</p>
-
-<p>It was one of those warm nights of winter when a sulphur-coloured sky
-hangs like a blanket behind the wet, dishevelled woods; and, though there
-was neither moon nor star, the night was strangely clear, and the shadow of
-the bridge was distinct in the water. When she approached the brink the
-swans moved slowly away. They reminded her of the cold; but the black
-obsession of death was upon her; and, hastening her steps, she threw
-herself forward. She fell into shallow water and regained her feet, and for
-<a name="270.png" class="pb"></a> a moment it seemed uncertain if she would
-wade to the bank or fling herself into a deeper place. Suddenly she sank,
-the water rising to her shoulders. She was lifted off her feet. A faint
-struggle, a faint cry, and then nothing&mdash;nothing but the whiteness of the
-swans moving through the sultry night slowly towards the island.</p>
-
-<a name="271.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<h2>XX</h2>
-
-<p><span class="small-caps">Its</span> rich, inanimate air proclaimed the
-room to be an expensive bedroom in a first-class London hotel. Interest in
-the newly-married couple, who were to occupy the room, prompted the
-servants to see that nothing was forgotten; and as they lingered steps were
-heard in the passage, and Hubert and Julia entered. The maid-servants stood
-aside to let them pass, and one inquired if madame wanted anything, so that
-her eyes might be gratified with a last inquisition of the happy pair.</p>
-
-<p>'How wonderful! oh, how wonderful! I don't think I ever saw any one act
-before like that&mdash;did you?'</p>
-
-<p>'She certainly had three or four moments that could not be surpassed.
-Her entrance in the sleep-walking scene&mdash;what vague horror! what pale
-presentiment! how she filled the stage! nothing seemed to exist but
-she.'</p>
-
-<p>'And Ford; what did you think of Ford's Macbeth?'</p>
-
-<a name="272.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Very good. Everything he does is good. Talent; but the other has
-genius.'</p>
-
-<p>'I shall never forget this evening. What an awful tragedy!'</p>
-
-<p>'Perhaps I should have taken you to see something more cheerful; but I
-wanted to see Miss Massey play Lady Macbeth. But let us talk of something
-else. Splendid fire&mdash;is it not?'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert threw off his overcoat, the movement attracted Julia's attention,
-and it startled her to see how old he seemed to have grown. She noticed as
-she had not noticed before the grey in his beard and the pathetic weary
-look that haunted his eyes. And she understood in that instant that the
-look his face wore was the look of those who have failed in their
-vocation.</p>
-
-<p>And at that very moment he was wondering if he really loved her, if his
-marriage were a mistake. The passion he had felt when walking with her on
-the wet country road he felt no longer, only an undefinable sadness and a
-weariness which he could not understand. He looked at his wife, and fearing
-that she divined his thoughts, he kissed her. She returned his kiss coldly
-and he wondered if she loved him. He thought that it was improbable that
-she did. Why should she love him? He <a name="273.png" class="pb"></a> had
-never loved any one. He had never inspired love in any one, except perhaps
-Emily.</p>
-
-<p>'I wonder if you really wished to be married,' she said.</p>
-
-<p>'I always wished to be married,' he replied. 'I hated the Bohemianism I was forced to live in. I longed for a
-home, for a wife.'</p>
-
-<p>'You were very poor once?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes: I've lived on tenpence and a shilling a day. I've worked in the
-docks as a labourer. I went down there hoping to get a clerkship on board
-one of the Transatlantic steamers. I had had enough of England, and thought
-of seeking fortune elsewhere.'</p>
-
-<p>'I can hardly believe you worked as a labourer in the docks.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; I did. I saw some men going to work, and I joined them. I don't
-think I thought much about it at the time. A very little misery rubs all
-the psychology out of us, and we return more easily than one thinks to the
-animal.'</p>
-
-<p>'And then?'</p>
-
-<p>'At the end of a week the work began to tell upon me, and I drifted back
-in search of my manuscript.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you must have been in a dreadful condition; your clothes&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<a name="274.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Ah! thereby hangs a tale. An actress lived in one of the houses I had
-been lodging in.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, tell me about her! This is getting very interesting.'</p>
-
-<p>Then passing his arm round his wife's neck, and with her sweet blonde
-face looking upon him, and the insinuating warmth of the fire about them,
-he told her the story of his failure.</p>
-
-<p>'But,' she said, her voice trembling, 'you would not have committed
-suicide?'</p>
-
-<p>'No man knows beforehand whether he will commit suicide. I can only say
-that every other issue was closed.'</p>
-
-<p>At the end of a long silence Julia said, 'I wish you hadn't spoken about
-suicide. I cannot but think of Emily. If she were to make away with
-herself! The very possibility turns my heart to ice. What should I do&mdash;what
-should we do? I ought never to have given way; we were both abominably
-selfish. I can see that poor girl sitting alone in that house grieving her
-heart out.'</p>
-
-<p>'You think that we ought never to have given way!'</p>
-
-<p>'I suppose we ought not. I tried very hard, you know I did.... But do
-you regret?' she said, looking at him suddenly.</p>
-
-<a name="275.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'No; I don't regret, but I wish it had happened otherwise.'</p>
-
-<p>'You don't fear anything. Nothing will happen. What can happen?'</p>
-
-<p>'The most terrible things often happen&mdash;have happened.'</p>
-
-<p>'Emily may have been fond of me&mdash;I think she was; but it was no more
-than the hysterical caprice of a young girl. Besides, people do not die for
-love; and I assure you it will be all right. This is not a time for gloomy
-thoughts.'</p>
-
-<p>'I'll try not to think of her. Well, what were we talking about? I know:
-about the actress who lived in 17 Fitzroy Street. Tell me about her.'</p>
-
-<p>'She was a real good girl. If she hadn't lent me that five shillings, I
-don't know where I should be now.'</p>
-
-<p>'Were you very fond of her?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; there never was anything of that sort between us. We were merely
-friends.'</p>
-
-<p>'And what has become of this actress?'</p>
-
-<p>'You saw her to-night?'</p>
-
-<p>'Was she acting in the piece we saw to-night?'</p>
-
-<p>'It was she who played Lady Macbeth.'</p>
-
-<p>'You are joking.'</p>
-
-<a name="276.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'No, I'm not. I always knew she had genius, and they have found it out;
-but I must say they have taken their time about it.'</p>
-
-<p>'How wonderful! she has succeeded!'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, <i>she</i> has succeeded!'</p>
-
-<p>'And she is really the girl you intended to play Lady Hayward?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; and I hope she will play the part one of these days.'</p>
-
-<p>'Of course, she is just the woman for it. What a splendid success she
-has had! All London is talking about her.'</p>
-
-<p>'And I remember when Ford refused to cast her for the adventuress in
-<i>Divorce</i>. If he had, there is no doubt she would have carried the
-piece through. Life is but a bundle of chances; she has succeeded, whatever
-that may mean.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you will let her have the part of Lady Hayward?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, of course&mdash;that is to say, if&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Why "if"?'</p>
-
-<p>'My thoughts are with you, dear; literature seems to have passed out of
-sight.'</p>
-
-<p>'But you must not sacrifice your talent in worship of me. I shall not
-allow you. For my sake, if not <a name="277.png" class="pb"></a> for hers,
-you must finish that play. I want you to be famous. I should be for ever
-miserable if my love proved a upas-tree.'</p>
-
-<p>'A upas-tree! It will be you who will help me; it will be your presence
-that will help me to write my play. I was always vaguely conscious that you
-were a necessary element in my life; but I did not wake up to any knowledge
-of it until that day&mdash;do you remember?&mdash;when you came into my study to ask
-me what fish I'd like for dinner, and I begged of you to allow me to read
-to you that second act. It is that second act that stops me.'</p>
-
-<p>'I thought you had written the second act to your satisfaction. You said
-that after the talk we had that afternoon you wrote for three hours without
-stopping, and that you had never done better work.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, I wrote a great deal; but on reading it over I found that&mdash;I don't
-mean to say that none of it will stand; some still seems to me to be all
-right, but a great deal will require alteration.'</p>
-
-<p>The conversation fell. At the end of a long silence Hubert said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'What are you thinking of, dearest?'</p>
-
-<p>'I was thinking that supposing you were mistaken&mdash;if I failed to help
-you in your work.'</p>
-
-<a name="278.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'And I never succeeded in writing my play?'</p>
-
-<p>'No; I don't mean that. Of course you will write your play; all you have
-to do is to be less critical.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, I know&mdash;I have heard that before; but, unfortunately, we cannot
-change ourselves. I'll either carry my play through completely, realise my
-ideal, or&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Remain for ever unsatisfied?'</p>
-
-<p>'Whether I write it or no, I shall be happy in your love.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, yes; let us be happy.'</p>
-
-<p>They looked at each other. He did not speak, but his thought said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'There is no happiness on earth for him who has not accomplished his
-task.'</p>
-
-<p>'Shall we be happy? I wonder. We have both suffered,' she said, 'we are
-both tired of suffering, and it is only right that we should be happy.'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, we shall be happy, I will be happy. It shall be my pleasure to
-attend to you, to give you all your desire. But you said just now that you
-had suffered. I have told you my past. Tell me yours. I know nothing except
-that you were unhappily married.'</p>
-
-<p>'There is little else to know; a woman's life is not adventurous, like a
-man's. I have not known <a name="279.png" class="pb"></a> the excitement of
-"first nights," nor the striving and the craving for an artistic ideal. My
-life has been essentially a woman's life,&mdash;suppression of self and
-monotonous duty, varied by heart-breaking misfortune. I married when I was
-very young; before I had even begun to think about life I found&mdash;&mdash; But why
-distress these hours with painful memories?'</p>
-
-<p>'It is pleasant to look back on the troubles we have passed
-through.'</p>
-
-<p>'Well, I learnt in one year the meaning of three terrible
-words&mdash;poverty, neglect, and cruelty. In the second year of my marriage my
-husband died of drink, and I was left a widow at twenty, entirely
-penniless. I went to live with my sister, and she was so poor that I had to
-support myself by giving music-lessons. You think you know the meaning of
-poverty: you may; but you do not know what a young woman who wants to earn
-her bread honestly has to put up with, trudging through wet and cold, mile
-after mile, to give a lesson, paid for at the rate of one-and-sixpence or
-two shillings an hour.'</p>
-
-<p>Julia took her eyes from her husband's face, and looked dreamily into
-the fire. Then, raising her face from the flame, she looked around with the
-air of one seeking for some topic of conversation. At that <a
-name="280.png" class="pb"></a> moment she caught sight of the corner of a
-letter lying on the mantelpiece. Reaching forth her hand, she took it. It
-was addressed to her husband.</p>
-
-<p>'Here is a letter for you, Hubert.... Why, it comes from Ashwood. Yes,
-and it is in the hand-writing of one of the servants. Oh, it is Black's
-writing! It may be about Emily. Something may have happened to her. Open it
-quickly.'</p>
-
-<p>'That is not probable. Nothing can have happened to her.'</p>
-
-<p>'Look and see. Be quick!'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert opened the letter, and he had not read three lines when Julia's
-face caught expression from his, which had become overcast.</p>
-
-<p>'It is bad news, I know. Something has happened. What is it? Don't keep
-me waiting. The suspense is worse than the truth.'</p>
-
-<p>'It is very awful, Julia. Don't give way.'</p>
-
-<p>'Tell me what it is. Is she dead?</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; she is dead.' Julia got up from her husband's knees and stood by
-the mantelpiece, leaning upon it. 'It is more than mere death.'</p>
-
-<p>'What do you mean? She killed herself&mdash;is that it?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes; she drowned herself the night before last in the lake.'</p>
-
-<a name="281.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>'Oh, it is too horrible! Then we have murdered her. Our unpardonable
-selfishness! I cannot bear it!' Her eyes closed and her lips trembled.
-Hubert caught her in his arms, laid her on the chair, and, fetching some
-water in a tumbler, sprinkled her face; then he held it to her lips; she
-drank a little, and revived. 'I'm not going to faint. Tell me&mdash;tell me when
-the unfortunate child&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'They don't know exactly. She was in the drawing-room at tea-time, and
-the drawing-room was empty when Black went round three-quarters of an hour
-after to lock up. He thought she had gone to her room. It was the gardener
-who brought in the news in the morning about nine.'</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, good God!'</p>
-
-<p>'Black says he noticed that she looked very depressed the day before,
-but he thought she was looking better when he brought in the tea.'</p>
-
-<p>'It was then she got my letter. Does Black say anything about giving her
-a letter?'</p>
-
-<p>'Yes, that is to say&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'I knew it! I knew it!' said Julia; and her eyes were wild with grief,
-and she rocked herself to and fro. 'It was that letter that drove her to
-it. It was most ill-advised. I told you so. You should have <a
-name="282.png" class="pb"></a> written. She would have borne the news
-better had it come from you. My instinct told me so, but I let myself be
-persuaded. I told you how it would happen. I told you. You can't say I
-didn't. Oh! why did you persuade me&mdash;why&mdash;why&mdash;why?'</p>
-
-<p>'Julia dear, we are not responsible. We were in nowise bound to
-sacrifice our happiness to her&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>'Don't say a word! I say we were bound. Life can never be the same to me
-again.'</p>
-
-<p>Hubert did not answer. Nothing he could say would be of the slightest
-avail, and he feared to say anything that might draw from her expressions
-which she would afterwards regret. He had never seen her moved like this,
-nor did he believe her capable of such agitation, and the contrast of her
-present with her usual demeanour made it the more impressive.</p>
-
-<p>'Oh,' she said, leaning forward and looking at him fixedly, 'take this
-nightmare off my brain, or I shall go mad! It isn't true; it cannot be
-true. But&mdash;oh! yes, it's true enough.'</p>
-
-<p>'Like you, Julia, I am overwhelmed; but we can do nothing.'</p>
-
-<p>'Do nothing!' she cried; 'do nothing! We can do nothing but pray for
-her&mdash;we who sacrificed her.' <a name="283.png" class="pb"></a> And she
-slipped on her knees and burst into a passionate fit of weeping.</p>
-
-<p>'The best thing that could have happened,' thought Hubert; and his
-thought said, clearly and precisely, 'Yes; it is awful, shocking, cruel
-beyond measure!'</p>
-
-<p>The fire was sinking, and he built it up quietly, ashamed of this proof
-of his regard for physical comfort, and hoping it would pass unnoticed. His
-pain expressed itself less vehemently than Julia's; but for all that his
-mind ached. He remembered how he had taken everything from her&mdash;fortune,
-happiness, and now life itself. It was an appalling tragedy&mdash;one of those
-senseless cruelties which we find nature constantly inventing. A thought
-revealed an unexpected analogy between him and his victim. In both lives
-there had been a supreme desire, and both had failed. 'Hers was the better
-part,' he said bitterly. 'Those whose souls are burdened with desire that
-may not be gratified had better fling the load aside. They are fools who
-carry it on to the end.... If it were not for Julia&mdash;&mdash;'</p>
-
-<p>Then he sought to determine what were his exact feelings. He knew he was
-infinitely sorry for poor Emily; but he could not stir himself into a
-paroxysm <a name="284.png" class="pb"></a> of grief, and, ashamed of his
-inability to express his feelings, he looked at Julia, who still wept.</p>
-
-<p>'No doubt,' he thought, 'women have keener feelings than we have.'</p>
-
-<p>At that moment Julia got up from her knees. She had brushed away her
-tears. Her face was shaken with grief.</p>
-
-<p>'My heart is breaking,' she said. 'This is too cruel&mdash;too cruel! And on
-my wedding night.'</p>
-
-<p>Their eyes met; and, divining each other's thought, each felt ashamed,
-and Julia said&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>'Oh, what am I saying? This dreadful selfishness, from which we cannot
-escape, that is with us even in such a moment as this! That poor child gone
-to her death, and yet amid it all we must think of ourselves.'</p>
-
-<p>'My dear Julia, we cannot escape from our human nature; but, for all
-that, our grief is sincere. We can do nothing. Do not grieve like
-that.'</p>
-
-<p>'And why not? She was my best friend. How have I repaid her? Alas! as
-woman always repays woman for kindness done. The old story. I cannot
-forgive myself. No, no! do not kiss me! I cannot bear it. Leave me. I can
-see nothing but Emily's reproachful face.' She covered her face in her
-hands and sobbed again.</p>
-
-<a name="285.png" class="pb"></a>
-
-<p>The same scenes repeated themselves over and over again. The same fits
-of passionate grief; the same moment of calm, when words impregnated with
-self dropped from their lips. The same nervous sense that something of the
-dead girl stood between them. And still they sat by the fire, weary with
-sorrow, recrimination, long regret, and pain. They could grieve no more;
-and before dawn sleep pressed upon their eyelids, and at the end of a long
-silence he dozed&mdash;a pale, transparent sleep, through which the realities of
-life appeared almost as plainly as before. Suddenly he awoke, and he
-shivered in the chill room. The fire was sinking; dawn divided the
-window-curtains. He looked at his wife. She seemed to him very beautiful as
-she slept, her face turned a little on one side, and again he asked himself
-if he loved her. Then, going to the window, he drew the curtains softly, so
-as not to awaken her; and as he stood watching a thin discoloured day
-breaking over the roofs, it again seemed to him that Emily's suicide was
-the better part. 'Those who do not perform their task in life are never
-happy.' The words drilled themselves into his brain with relentless
-insistency. He felt a terrible emptiness within him which he could not
-fill. He looked at his wife and quailed a little <a name="286.png"
-class="pb"></a> at the thought that had suddenly come upon him. She was
-something like himself&mdash;that was why he had married her. We are attracted
-by what is like ourselves. Emily's passion might have stirred him. Now he
-would have to settle down to live with Julia, and their similar natures
-would grow more and more like one another. Then, turning on his thoughts,
-he dismissed them. They were the morbid feverish fancies of an exceptional,
-of a terrible night. He opened the window quietly so as not to awaken his
-wife. And in the melancholy greyness of the dawn he looked down into the
-street and wondered what the end would be.</p>
-
-<p>He did not think that he would live long. Disappointed men&mdash;those who
-have failed in their ambition&mdash;do not live to make old bones. There were
-men like him in every profession&mdash;the arts are crowded with them. He had
-met barristers and soldiers and clergy-men, just like himself. One hears of
-their deaths&mdash;failure of the heart's action, paralysis of the brain, a
-hundred other medical causes&mdash;but the real cause is, lack of
-appreciation.</p>
-
-<p>He would hang on for another few years, no doubt; during that time he
-must try to make his wife happy. <a name="287.png" class="pb"></a> His duty
-was now to be a good husband, at all events, there was that.</p>
-
-<p>His wife lay asleep in the arm-chair, and fearing she might catch cold,
-he came into the room closing the window very gently behind him.</p>
-
-<p>THE END</p>
-
-<p>Printed by T. and A. <span class="small-caps">Constable</span>, printers
-to Her Majesty at the Edinburgh University Press.</p>
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-<pre>
-
-
-
-
-
-End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Vain Fortune, by George Moore
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-The Project Gutenberg eBook, Vain Fortune, by George Moore
-
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
-almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
-re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
-with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
-
-
-
-
-
-Title: Vain Fortune
-
-Author: George Moore
-
-Release Date: February 26, 2004 [eBook #11303]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: US-ASCII
-
-
-***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK VAIN FORTUNE***
-
-
-
-[Illustration: "She slipped on her knees, and burst into a passionate fit
-of weeping."]
-
-Vain Fortune
-
-A Novel
-
-By
-
-George Moore
-
-_With Five Illustrations By__Maurice Greiffenhagen_
-
-New Edition
-
-Completely Revised
-
-London: Walter Scott, Ltd. Paternoster Square
-
-1895
-
-Edinburgh: T. and A. Constable, Printers to Her Majesty
-
-
-
-
-Prefatory Note
-
-
-I hope it will not seem presumptuous to ask my critics to treat this new
-edition of _Vain Fortune_ as a new book: for it is a new book. The first
-edition was kindly noticed, but it attracted little attention, and very
-rightly, for the story as told therein was thin and insipid; and when
-Messrs. Scribner proposed to print the book in America, I stipulated that I
-should be allowed to rewrite it. They consented, and I began the story with
-Emily Watson, making her the principal character instead of Hubert Price.
-Some months after I received a letter from Madam Couperus, offering to
-translate the English edition into Dutch. I sent her the American edition,
-and asked her which she would prefer to translate from. Madam Couperus
-replied that many things in the English edition, which she would like to
-retain, had been omitted from the American edition, that the hundred or
-more pages which I had written for the American edition seemed to her
-equally worthy of retention.
-
-She pointed out that, without the alteration of a sentence, the two
-versions could be combined. The idea had not occurred to me; I saw,
-however, that what she proposed was not only feasible but advantageous. I
-wrote, therefore, giving her the required permission, and thanking her for
-a suggestion which I should avail myself of when the time came for a new
-English edition.
-
-The union of the texts was no doubt accomplished by Madam Couperus, without
-the alteration of a sentence; but no such accomplished editing is possible
-to me; I am a victim to the disease of rewriting, and the inclusion of the
-hundred or more pages of new matter written for the American edition led me
-into a third revision of the story. But no more than in the second has the
-skeleton, or the attitude of the skeleton been altered in this third
-version, only flesh and muscle have been added, and, I think, a little
-life. _Vain Fortune_, even in its present form, is probably not my best
-book, but it certainly is far from being my worst. But my opinion regarding
-my own work is of no value; I do not write this Prefatory Note to express
-it, but to ask my critics and my readers to forget the original _Vain
-Fortune_, and to read this new book as if it were issued under another
-title.
-
-G.M.
-
-
-
-
-I
-
-
-The lamp had not been wiped, and the room smelt slightly of paraffin. The
-old window-curtains, whose harsh green age had not softened, were drawn.
-The mahogany sideboard, the threadbare carpet, the small horsehair sofa,
-the gilt mirror, standing on a white marble chimney-piece, said clearly,
-'Furnished apartments in a house built about a hundred years ago.' There
-were piles of newspapers, there were books on the mahogany sideboard and on
-the horsehair sofa, and on the table there were various manuscripts,--_The
-Gipsy_, Act I.; _The Gipsy_, Act III., Scenes iii. and iv.
-
-A sheet of foolscap paper, and upon it a long slender hand. The hand traced
-a few lines of fine, beautiful caligraphy, then it paused, correcting with
-extreme care what was already written, and in a hesitating, minute way,
-telling of a brain that delighted in the correction rather than in the
-creation of form.
-
-The shirt-cuff was frayed and dirty. The coat was thin and shiny. A
-half-length figure of a man drew out of the massed shadows between the
-window and sideboard. The red beard caught the light, and the wavy brown
-hair brightened. Then a look of weariness, of distress, passed over the
-face, and the man laid down the pen, and, taking some tobacco from a paper,
-rolled a cigarette. Rising, and leaning forward, he lighted it over the
-lamp. He was a man of about thirty-six feet, broad-shouldered, well-built,
-healthy, almost handsome.
-
-The time he spent in dreaming his play amounted to six times, if not ten
-times, as much as he devoted to trying to write it; and he now lit
-cigarette after cigarette, abandoning himself to every meditation,--the
-unpleasantness of life in lodgings, the charm of foreign travel, the beauty
-of the south, what he would do if his play succeeded. He plunged into
-calculation of the time it would take him to finish it if he were to sit at
-home all day, working from seven to ten hours every day. If he could but
-make up his mind concerning the beginning and the middle of the third act,
-and about the end, too,--the solution,--he felt sure that, with steady
-work, the play could be completed in a fortnight. In such reverie and such
-consideration he lay immersed, oblivious of the present moment, and did not
-stir from his chair until the postman shook the frail walls with a violent
-double knock. He hoped for a letter, for a newspaper--either would prove a
-welcome distraction. The servant's footsteps on the stairs told him the
-post had brought him something. His heart sank at the thought that it was
-probably only a bill, and he glanced at all the bills lying one above
-another on the table.
-
-It was not a bill, nor yet an advertisement, but a copy of a weekly review.
-He tore it open. An article about himself!
-
-After referring to the deplorable condition of the modern stage, the writer
-pointed out how dramatic writing has of late years come to be practised
-entirely by men who have failed in all other branches of literature. Then
-he drew attention to the fact that signs of weariness and dissatisfaction
-with the old stale stories, the familiar tricks in bringing about 'striking
-situations,' were noticeable, not only in the newspaper criticisms of new
-plays, but also among the better portion of the audience. He admitted,
-however, that hitherto the attempts made by younger writers in the
-direction of new subject-matter and new treatment had met with little
-success. But this, he held, was not a reason for discouragement. Did those
-who believed in the old formulas imagine that the new formula would be
-discovered straight away, without failures preliminary? Besides, these
-attempts were not utterly despicable; at least one play written on the new
-lines had met with some measure of success, and that play was Mr. Hubert
-Price's _Divorce_.
-
-'Yes, the fellow is right. The public is ready for a good play: it wasn't
-when _Divorce_ was given. I must finish _The Gipsy_. There are good things
-in it; that I know. But I wish I could get that third act right. The public
-will accept a masterpiece, but it will not accept an attempt to write a
-masterpiece. But this time there'll be no falling off in the last acts. The
-scene between the gipsy lover and the young lord will fetch 'em.' Taking up
-the review, Hubert glanced over the article a second time. 'How anxious the
-fellows are for me to achieve a success! How they believe in me! They
-desire it more than I do. They believe in me more than I do in myself. They
-want to applaud me. They are hungry for the masterpiece.'
-
-At that moment his eye was caught by some letters written on blue paper.
-His face resumed a wearied and hunted expression. 'There's no doubt about
-it, money I must get somehow. I am running it altogether too fine. There
-isn't twenty pounds between me and the deep sea.'
-
- * * * * *
-
-He was the son of the Rev. James Price, a Shropshire clergyman. The family
-was of Welsh extraction, but in Hubert none of the physical characteristics
-of the Celt appeared. He might have been selected as a typical Anglo-Saxon.
-The face was long and pale, and he wore a short reddish beard; the eyes
-were light blue, verging on grey, and they seemed to speak a quiet,
-steadfast soul. Hubert had always been his mother's favourite, and the
-scorn of his elder brothers, two rough boys, addicted in early youth to
-robbing orchards, and later on to gambling and drinking. The elder, after
-having broken his father's heart with debts and disgraceful living, had
-gone out to the Cape. News of his death came to the Rectory soon after; but
-James's death did not turn Henry from his evil courses, and one day his
-father and mother had to go to London on his account, and they brought him
-back a hopeless invalid. Hubert was twelve years of age when he followed
-his brother to the grave.
-
-It was at his brother's funeral that Hubert met for the first time his
-uncle, Mr. Burnett. Mr. Burnett had spent the greater part of his life in
-New Zealand, where he had made a large fortune by sheep-farming and
-investments in land. He had seemed to be greatly taken with his nephew, and
-for many years it was understood that he would leave him the greater part,
-if not the whole, of his fortune. But Mr. Burnett had come under the
-influence of some poor relations, some distant cousins, the Watsons, and
-had eventually decided to adopt their daughter Emily and leave her his
-fortune. He did not dare intimate his change of mind to his sister; but the
-news having reached Mrs. Price in various rumours, she wrote to her brother
-asking him to confirm or deny these rumours; and when he admitted their
-truth, Mrs. Price never spoke to him again. She was a determined woman, and
-the remembrance of the wrong done to her son never left her.
-
-While the other children had been a torment and disgrace, Hubert had been
-to his parents a consolation and a blessing. They had feared that he too
-might turn to betting and drink, but he had never shown sign of low tastes.
-He played no games, nor did he care for terriers or horses; but for books
-and drawing, and long country walks. Immediately on hearing of his
-disinheritance he had spoken at once of entering a profession; and for many
-months this was the subject of consideration in the Rectory. Hubert joined
-in these discussions willingly, but he could not bring himself to accept
-the army or the bar. It was indeed only necessary to look at him to see
-that neither soldier's tunic nor lawyer's wig was intended for him; and it
-was nearly as clear that those earnest eyes, so intelligent and yet so
-undetermined in their gaze, were not those of a doctor.
-
-But if his eyes failed to predict his future, his hands told the story of
-his life distinctly enough--those long, white, languid hands, what could
-they mean but art? And very soon Hubert began to draw, evincing some
-natural aptitude. Then an artist came into the neighbourhood, the two
-became friends, and went together on a long sketching tour. Life in the
-open air, the shade of the hedge, the glare of the highway, the meditation
-of the field, the languor of the river-side, the contemplation of wooded
-horizons, was what Hubert's pastoral nature was most fitted to enjoy; and,
-for the sake of the life it afforded him, he pursued the calling of a
-landscape painter long after he had begun to feel his desire turning in
-another direction. When the landscape on the canvas seemed hopelessly
-inadequate, he laid aside the brush for the pencil, and strove to interpret
-the summer fields in verse. From verse he drifted into the article and the
-short story, and from the story into the play. And it was in this last form
-that he felt himself strongest, and various were the dramas and comedies
-that he dreamed from year's end to year's end.
-
-While he was in the midst of his period of verse-writing his mother died,
-and in the following year, just as he was working at his stories, he
-received a telegram calling him to attend his father's death-bed. When the
-old man was laid in the shadow of the weather-beaten village church, Hubert
-gathered all his belongings and bade farewell for ever to the Shropshire
-rectory.
-
-In London Hubert made few friends. There were some two or three men with
-whom he was frequently seen--quiet folk like himself, whose enjoyment
-consisted in smoking a tranquil pipe in the evening, or going for long
-walks in the country. He was one of those men whose indefiniteness provokes
-curiosity, and his friends noticed and wondered why it was that he was so
-frequently the theme of their conversation. His simple, unaffected manners
-were full of suggestion, and in his writings there was always an
-indefinable rainbow-like promise of ultimate achievement. So, long before
-he had succeeded in writing a play, detached scenes and occasional verses
-led his friends into gradual belief that he was one from whom big things
-might be expected. And when the one-act play which they had all so heartily
-approved of was produced, and every newspaper praised it for its literary
-quality, the friends took pride in this public vindication of their
-opinion. After the production of his play people came to see the new
-author, and every Saturday evening some fifteen or twenty men used to
-assemble in Hubert's lodgings to drink whisky, smoke cigars, and talk
-drama. Encouraged by his success, Hubert wrote _Divorce_. He worked
-unceasingly upon it for more than a year, and when he had written the final
-scene, he was breaking into his last hundred pounds. The play was refused
-twice, and then accepted by a theatrical speculator, to whom it seemed to
-afford opportunity for the exhibition of the talents of a lady he was
-interested in.
-
-The success of the play was brief. But before it was withdrawn, Hubert had
-sold the American rights for a handsome sum, and within the next two years
-he had completed a second play, which he called _An Ebbing Tide_. Some of
-the critics argued that it contained scenes as fine as any in _Divorce_,
-but it was admitted on all sides that the interest withered in the later
-acts. But the failure of the play did not shake the established belief in
-Hubert's genius; it merely concentrated the admiration of those interested
-in the new art upon _Divorce_, the partial failure of which was now
-attributed to the acting. If it had only been played at the Haymarket or
-the Lyceum, it could not have failed.
-
-The next three years Hubert wasted in various aestheticisms. He explained
-the difference between the romantic and realistic methods in the reviews;
-he played with a poetic drama to be called _The King of the Beggars_, and
-it was not until the close of the third year that he settled down to
-definite work. Then all his energies were concentrated on a new play--_The
-Gipsy_. A young woman of Bohemian origin is suddenly taken with the
-nostalgia of the tent, and leaves her husband and her home to wander with
-those of her race. He had read portions of this play to his friends, who at
-last succeeded in driving Montague Ford, the popular actor-manager, to
-Hubert's door; and after hearing some few scenes he had offered a couple of
-hundred pounds in advance of fees for the completed manuscript. 'But when
-can I have the manuscript?' said Ford, as he was about to leave. 'As soon
-as I can finish it,' Hubert replied, looking at him wistfully out of pale
-blue-grey eyes. 'I could finish it in a month, if I could count on not
-being worried by duns or disturbed by friends during that time.'
-
-Ford looked at Hubert questioningly; then he said 'I have always noticed
-that when a fellow wants to finish a play, the only way to do it is to go
-away to the country and leave no address.'
-
-But the country was always so full of pleasure for him, that he doubted his
-power to remain indoors with the temptation of fields and rivers before his
-eyes, and he thought that to escape from dunning creditors it would be
-sufficient to change his address. So he left Norfolk Street for the more
-remote quarter of Fitzroy Street, where he took a couple of rooms on the
-second floor. One of his fellow-lodgers, he soon found, was Rose Massey, an
-actress engaged for the performance of small parts at the Queen's Theatre.
-The first time he spoke to her was on the doorstep. She had forgotten her
-latch-key, and he said, 'Will you allow me to let you in?' She stepped
-aside, but did not answer him. Hubert thought her rude, but her strange
-eyes and absent-minded manner had piqued his curiosity, and, having nothing
-to do that night, he went to the theatre to see her act. She was playing a
-very small part, and one that was evidently unsuited to her--a part that
-was in contradiction to her nature; but there was something behind the
-outer envelope which led him to believe she had real talent, and would make
-a name for herself when she was given a part that would allow her to reveal
-what was in her.
-
-In the meantime, Rose had been told that the gentleman she had snubbed in
-the passage was Mr. Hubert Price, the author of _Divorce_.
-
-'Oh, it was very silly of me,' she said to Annie. 'If I had only known!'
-
-'Lor', he don't mind; he'll be glad enough to speak to you when you meets
-him again.'
-
-And when they met again on the stairs, Rose nodded familiarly, and Hubert
-said--
-
-'I went to the Queen's the other night.'
-
-'Did you like the piece?'
-
-'I did not care about the piece; but when you get a wild, passionate part
-to play, you'll make a hit. The sentimental parts they give you don't suit
-you.'
-
-A sudden light came into the languid face. 'Yes, I shall do something if I
-can get a part like that.'
-
-Hubert told her that he was writing a play containing just such a part.
-
-Her eyes brightened again. 'Will you read me the play?' she said, fixing
-her dark, dreamy eyes on him.
-
-'I shall be very glad.... Do you think it won't bore you?' And his wistful
-grey eyes were full of interrogation.
-
-'No, I'm sure it won't.'
-
-And a few days after she sent Annie with a note, reminding him of his
-promise to read her what he had written. As she had only a bedroom, the
-reading had to take place in his sitting-room. He read her the first and
-second acts. She was all enthusiasm, and begged hard to be allowed to study
-the part--just to see what she could do with it--just to let him see that
-he was not mistaken in her. Her interest in his work captivated him, and he
-couldn't refuse to lend her the manuscript.
-
-
-
-
-II
-
-
-Rose often came to see Hubert in his rooms. Her manner was disappointing,
-and he thought he must be mistaken in his first judgment of her talents.
-But one afternoon she gave him a recitation of the sleep-walking scene in
-_Macbeth_. It was strange to see this little dark-complexioned, dark-eyed
-girl, the merest handful of flesh and bone, divest herself at will of her
-personality, and assume the tragic horror of Lady Macbeth, or the
-passionate rapture of Juliet detaining her husband-lover on the balcony of
-her chamber. Hubert watched in wonderment this girl, so weak and languid in
-her own nature, awaking only to life when she assumed the personality of
-another. There she lay, her wispy form stretched in his arm-chair, her
-great dark eyes fixed, her mind at rest, sunk in some inscrutable dream.
-Her thin hand lay on the arm of the chair: when she woke from her day-dream
-she burst into irresponsible laughter, or questioned him with petulant
-curiosity. He looked again: her dark curling hair hung on her swarthy neck,
-and she was somewhat untidily dressed in blue linen.
-
-'Were you ever in love?' she said suddenly. 'I don't suppose you could be;
-you are too occupied with your play. I don't know, though; you might be in
-love, but I don't think that many women would be in love with you.... You
-are too good a man, and women don't like good men.'
-
-Hubert laughed, and without a trace of offended vanity in his voice he
-said, 'I don't profess to be much of a lady-killer.'
-
-'You don't know what I mean,' she said, looking at him fixedly, a maze of
-half-childish, half-artistic curiosity in her handsome eyes.
-
-Perplexed in his shy, straightford nature, Hubert inquired if she took
-sugar in her tea. She said she did; stretched her feet to the fire, and
-lapsed into dream. She was one of the enigmas of Stageland. She supported
-herself, and went about by herself, looking a poor, lost little thing. She
-spoke with considerable freedom of language on all subjects, but no one had
-been able to fix a lover upon her.
-
-'What a part Lady Hayward is! But tell me,--I don't quite catch your
-meaning in the second act. Is this it?' and starting to her feet, she
-became in a moment another being. With a gesture, a look, an intonation,
-she was the woman of the play,--a woman taken by an instinct, long
-submerged, but which has floated to the surface, and is beginning to
-command her actions. In another moment she had slipped back into her weary
-lymphatic nature, at once prematurely old and extravagantly childish. She
-could not talk of indifferent things; and having asked some strange
-questions, and laughed loudly, she wished Hubert 'Good-afternoon' in her
-curious, irresponsible fashion, taking her leave abruptly.
-
-The next two days Hubert devoted entirely to his play. There were things in
-it which he knew were good, but it was incomplete. Montague Ford would not
-produce it in its present form. He must put his shoulder to the wheel and
-get it right; one more push, that was all that was wanted. And he could be
-heard walking to and fro, up and down, along and across his tiny
-sitting-room, stopping suddenly to take a note of an idea that had occurred
-to him.
-
-One day he went to Hampstead Heath. A long walk, he thought, would clear
-his mind, and he returned home thinking of his play. The sunset still
-glittering in the skies; the bare trees were beautifully distinct on the
-blue background of the suburban street, and at the end of the long
-perspective, a 'bus and a hansom could be seen coming towards him. As they
-grew larger, his thoughts defined themselves, and the distressing problem
-of his fourth act seemed to solve itself. That very evening he would sketch
-out a new dramatic movement around which all the other movements of the act
-would cluster. But at the corner of Fitzroy Square, within a few yards of
-No. 17, he was accosted by a shabbily-dressed man, who inquired if he were
-Mr. Price. On being answered in the affirmative, the shabbily-dressed man
-said, 'Then I have something for ye; I have been a-watching for ye for the
-last three days, but ye didn't come out; missed yer this morning: 'ere it
-is;' and he thrust a folded paper into Hubert's hand.
-
-'What is this?'
-
-'Don't yer know?' he said with a grin; 'Messrs. Tomkins & Co., Tailors,
-writ--twenty-two pound odd.'
-
-Hubert made no answer; he put the paper in his pocket, opened the door
-quietly, stole up to his room, and sat down to think. The first thing to do
-was to examine into his finances. It was alarming to find that he was
-breaking into his last five-pound note. True that he was close on the end
-of his play, and when it was finished he would be able to draw on Ford. But
-a summons to appear in the county court could not fail to do him immense
-injury. He had heard of avoiding service, but he knew little of the law,
-and wondered what power the service of the writ gave his creditor over him.
-His instinct was to escape--hide himself where they would not be able to
-find him, and so obtain time to finish his play. But he owed his landlady
-money, and his departure would have to be clandestine. As he reflected on
-how many necessaries he might carry away in a newspaper, he began to feel
-strangely like a criminal, and while rolling up a couple of shirts, a few
-pairs of socks, and some collars, he paused, his hands resting on the
-parcel. He did not seem to know himself, and it was difficult to believe
-that he really intended to leave the house in this disreputable fashion.
-Mechanically he continued to add to his parcel, thinking all the while that
-he must go, otherwise his play would never be written.
-
-He had been working very well for the last few days, and now he saw his way
-quite clearly; the inspiration he had been so long waiting for had come at
-last, and he felt sure of his fourth act. At the same time he wished to
-conduct himself honestly, even in this distressing situation. Should he
-tell his landlady the truth? But the desire to realise his idea was
-intolerable, and, yielding as if before an irresistible force, he tied the
-parcel and prepared to go. At that moment he remembered that he must leave
-a note for his landlady, and he was more than ever surprised at the
-naturalness with which lying phrases came into his head. But when it came
-to committing them to paper, he found he could not tell an absolute lie,
-and he wrote a simple little note to the effect that he had been called
-away on urgent business, and hoped to return in about a week.
-
-He descended the stairs softly. Mrs. Wilson's sitting-room opened on to the
-passage; she might step out at any moment, and intercept his exit. He had
-nearly reached the last flight when he remembered that he had forgotten his
-manuscripts. His flesh turned cold, his heart stood still. There was
-nothing for it but to ascend those creaking stairs again. His already
-heavily encumbered pockets could not be persuaded to receive more than a
-small portion of the manuscripts. He gathered them in his hand, and
-prepared to redescend the perilous stairs. He walked as lightly as
-possible, dreading that every creak would bring Mrs. Wilson from her
-parlour. A few more steps, and he would be in the passage. A smell of dust,
-sounds of children crying, children talking in the kitchen! A few more
-steps, and, with his eyes on the parlour door, Hubert had reached the rug
-at the foot of the stairs. He hastened along, the passage. Mrs. Wilson was
-a moment too late. His hand was on the street-door when she appeared at the
-door of her parlour.
-
-'Mr. Price, I want to speak to you before you go out. There has----'
-
-'I can't wait--running to catch a train. You'll find a letter on my table.
-It will explain.'
-
-Hubert slipped out, closed the door, and ran down the street, and it was
-not until he had put two or three streets between him and Fitzroy Street
-that he relaxed his pace, and could look behind him without dreading to
-feel the hand of the 'writter' upon his shoulder.
-
-
-
-
-III
-
-
-Then he wandered, not knowing where he was going, still in the sensation of
-his escape, a little amused, and yet with a shadow of fear upon his soul,
-for he grew more and more conscious of the fact that he was homeless, if
-not quite penniless. Suddenly he stopped walking. Night was thickening in
-the street, and he had to decide where he would sleep. He could not afford
-to pay more than five or six shillings a week for a room, and he thought of
-Holloway, as being a neighbourhood where creditors would not be able to
-find him. So he retraced his steps, and, tired and footsore, entered the
-Tottenham Court Road by the Oxford Street end.
-
-There the omnibuses stopped. A conductor shouted for fares, with the light
-of the public-house lamps on his open mouth. There was smell of mud, of
-damp clothes, of bad tobacco, and where the lights of the costermongers'
-barrows broke across the footway the picture was of a group of three
-coarse, loud-voiced girls, followed by boys. There were fish shops, cheap
-Italian restaurants, and the long lines of low houses vanished in crapulent
-night. The characteristics of the Tottenham Court Road impressed themselves
-on Hubert's mind, and he thought how he would have to bear for at least
-three weeks with all the grime of its poverty. It would take about that
-time to finish his play, and the neighbourhood would suit his purpose
-excellently well. So long as he did not pass beyond it he ran little risk
-of discovery, and to secure himself against friends and foes he penetrated
-farther northward, not stopping till he reached the confines of Holloway.
-
-Then a little dim street caught his eye, and he knocked at the door of the
-first house exhibiting a card in the parlour window. But they did not let
-their bedroom under seven shillings, and this seemed to Hubert to be an
-extravagant price. He tried farther on, and at last found a clean room for
-six shillings. Having no luggage, he paid a week's rent in advance, and the
-landlady promised to get him a small table, on which he could write, a
-small table that would fit in somewhere near the window. She asked him when
-he would like to be called, and put the candlestick on the chair. Hubert
-looked round the room, and a moment sufficed to complete the survey. It was
-about seven feet long. The lower half of the window was curtained by a
-piece of muslin hardly bigger than a good-sized pocket-handkerchief; to do
-anything in this room except to lie in bed seemed difficult, and Hubert sat
-down on the bed and emptied out his pockets. He had just four pounds, and
-the calculation how long he could live on such a sum took him some time.
-His breakfast, whether he had it at home or in the coffee-house, would cost
-him at least fourpence. He thought he would be able to obtain a fairly good
-dinner in one of the little Italian restaurants for ninepence. His tea
-would cost the same as his breakfast. To these sums he must add twopence
-for tobacco and a penny for an evening paper--impossible to do without
-tobacco, and he must know what was going on in the world. He could
-therefore live for one shilling and eightpence a day--eleven shillings a
-week--to which he would have to add six shillings a week for rent,
-altogether seventeen shillings a week. He really did not see how he could
-do it cheaper. Four times seventeen are sixty-eight; sixty-eight shillings
-for a month of life, and he had eighty shillings--twelve shillings for
-incidental expenses; and out of that twelve shillings he must buy a shirt,
-a sponge, and a tooth brush, and when they were bought there would be very
-little left. He must finish his play under the month. Nothing could be
-clearer than that.
-
-Next morning he asked the landlady to let him have a cup of tea and some
-bread and butter, and he ate as much bread as he could, to save himself
-from being hungry in the middle of the day. He began work immediately, and
-continued until seven, and feeling then somewhat light-headed, but
-satisfied with himself, went to the nearest Italian restaurant. The food
-was better than he expected; but he spent twopence more than he had
-intended, so, to accustom himself to a life of strict measure and
-discipline, he determined to forego his tea that evening. And so he lived
-and worked until the end of the week.
-
-But the situation he had counted on to complete his fourth act had proved
-almost impracticable in the working out; he laboured on, however, and at
-the end of the tenth day at least one scene satisfied him. He read it over
-slowly, carefully, thought about it, decided that it was excellent, and lay
-down on his bed to consider it. At that moment it struck him that he had
-better calculate how much he had spent in the last ten days. He gathered
-himself into a sitting posture and counted his money; he had spent thirty
-shillings, and at that rate his money would not hold out till the end of
-the month. He must reduce his expenditure; but how? Impossible to find a
-room where he could live more cheaply than in the one he had got, and it is
-not easy to dine in London on less than ninepence. Only the poor can live
-cheaply. He pressed his hands to his face. His head seemed like splitting,
-and his monetary difficulty, united with his literary difficulties,
-produced a momentary insanity. Work that morning was impossible, so he went
-out to study the eating-houses of the neighbourhood. He must find one where
-he could dine for sixpence. Or he might buy a pound of cooked beef and take
-it home with him in a paper bag; but that would seem an almost intolerable
-imprisonment in his little room. He could go to a public-house and dine off
-a sausage and potato. But at that moment his attention was caught by black
-letters on a dun, yellowish ground: 'Lockhart's Cocoa Rooms.' Not having
-breakfasted, he decided to have a cup of cocoa and a roll.
-
-It was a large, barn-like place, the walls covered with a coat of grey-blue
-paint. Under the window there was a zinc counter, with zinc urns always
-steaming, emiting odours of tea, coffee, and cocoa. The seats were like
-those which give a garden-like appearance to the tops of some omnibuses.
-Each was made to hold two persons, and the table between them was large
-enough for four plates and four pairs of hands. A few hollow-chested men,
-the pale vagrants of civilisation, drowsed in the corners. They had been
-hunted through the night by the policeman, and had come in for something
-hot. Hubert noted the worn frock-coats, and the miserable arms coming out
-of shirtless sleeves. One looked up inquiringly, and Hubert thought how
-slight had become the line that divided him from the outcast. A
-serving-maid collected the plates, knives and forks, when the customers
-left, and carried them back to the great zinc counter.
-
-Impressed by his appearance, she brought him what he had ordered and took
-the money for it, although the custom of the place was for the customer to
-pay for food at the counter and carry it himself to the table at which he
-chose to eat. Hubert learnt that there was no set dinner, but there was a
-beef-steak pudding at one, price fourpence, a penny potatoes, a penny
-bread. So by dining at Lockhart's he would be able to cut down his daily
-expense by at least twopence; that would extend the time to finish his play
-by nearly a week. And if his appetite were not keen, he could assuage it
-with a penny plum pudding; or he could take a middle course, making his
-dinner off a sausage and mashed potatoes. The room was clean, well lighted,
-and airy; he could read his paper there, and forget his troubles in the
-observation of character. He even made friends. An old wizen creature, who
-had been a prize-fighter, told him of his triumphs. If he hadn't broke his
-hand on somebody's nose he'd have been champion light-weight of England.
-'And to think that I have come to this,' he added emphatically. 'Even them
-boys knock me about now, and 'alf a century ago I could 'ave cleared the
-bloomin' place.' There was a merry little waif from the circus who loved to
-come and sit with Hubert. She had been a rider, she said, but had broken
-her leg on one occasion, and cut her head all open on another, and had
-ended by running away with some one who had deserted her. 'So here I am,'
-she remarked, with a burst of laughter, 'talking to you. Did you never hear
-of Dolly Dayrell?' Hubert confessed that he had not. 'Why,' she said, 'I
-thought every one had.'
-
-About eight o'clock in the evening, the table near the stairs was generally
-occupied by flower-girls, dressed in dingy clothes, and brightly feathered
-hats. They placed their empty baskets on the floor, and shouted at their
-companions--men who sold newspapers, boot-laces, and cheap toys. About nine
-the boys came in, the boys who used to push the old prize-fighter about,
-and Hubert soon began to perceive how representative they were of all
-vices--gambling, theft, idleness, and cruelty were visible in their faces.
-They were led by a Jew boy who sold penny jewellery at the corner of Oxford
-Street, and they generally made for the tables at the end of the room, for
-there, unless custom was slack indeed, they could defeat the vigilance of
-the serving-maid and play at nap at their ease. The tray of penny jewellery
-was placed at the corner of a table, and a small boy set to watch over it.
-His duty was also to shuffle his feet when the servant-maid approached, and
-a precious drubbing he got if he failed to shuffle them loud enough. The
-''ot un,' as he was nicknamed, always had a pack of cards in his pocket,
-and to annex everything left on the tables he considered to be his
-privilege. One day, when he was asked how he came by the fine carnation in
-his buttonhole, he said it was a present from Sally, neglecting to add that
-he had told the child to steal it from a basket which a flower-girl had
-just put down.
-
-[Illustration: "'A dirty, hignominious lot, them boys is.'"]
-
-Hubert hated this boy, and once could not resist boxing his ears. The ''ot
-un' writhed easily out of his reach, and then assailed him with foul
-language, and so loud were his words that they awoke the innocent cause of
-the quarrel, a weak, sickly-looking man, with pale blue eyes and a blonde
-beard. Hubert had protected him before now against the brutality of the
-boys, who, when they were not playing nap, divided their pleasantries
-between him and the decrepit prize-fighter. He came in about nine, took a
-cup of coffee from the counter, and settled himself for a snooze. The boys
-knew this, and it was their amusement to keep him awake by pelting him with
-egg-shells and other missiles. Hubert noticed that he had always with him a
-red handkerchief full of some sort of loose rubbish, which the boys
-gathered when it fell about the floor, or purloined from the handkerchief
-when they judged that the owner was sufficiently fast asleep. Hubert now
-saw that the handkerchief was filled with bits of coloured chalk, and
-guessed that the man must be a pavement artist.
-
-'A dirty, hignominious lot, them boys is,' said the artist, fixing his
-pale, melancholy eyes on Hubert; 'bad manners, no eddication, and, above
-all, no respect.'
-
-'They are an unmannerly lot--that Jew boy especially. I don't think there's
-a vice he hasn't got.'
-
-The artist stared at Hubert a long time in silence. A thought seemed to be
-stirring in his mind.
-
-'I'm speaking, I can see, to a man of eddication. I'm a fust-rate judge of
-character, though I be but a pavement artist; but a picture's none the less
-a picture, no matter where it is drawn. That's true, ain't it?'
-
-'Quite true. A horse is a horse, and an ass is an ass, no matter what
-stable you put them into.'
-
-The artist laughed a guttural laugh, and, fixing his pale blue porcelain
-eyes on Hubert, he said--
-
-'Yes; see I made no bloomin' error when I said you was a man of eddication.
-A literary gent, I should think. In the reporting line, most like. Down in
-the luck like myself. What was it--drink? Got the chuck?'
-
-'No,' said Hubert, 'never touch it. Out of work.'
-
-'No offence, master, we're all mortal, we is all weak, and in misfortune we
-goes to it. It was them boys that drove me to it.'
-
-'How was that?'
-
-'They was always round my show; no getting rid of them, and their remarks
-created a disturbance; the perlice said he wouldn't 'ave it, and when the
-perlice won't 'ave it, what's a poor man to do? They are that hignorant.
-But what's the use of talking of it, it only riles me.' The blue-eyed man
-lay back in his seat, and his head sank on his chest. He looked as if he
-were going to sleep again, but on Hubert's asking him to explain his
-troubles, he leaned across the table.
-
-'Well, I'll tell yer. Yer be an eddicated man, and I likes to talk to them
-that 'as 'ad an eddication. Yer says, and werry truly, just now, that
-changing the stable don't change an 'orse into a hass, or a hass into an
-'orse. That is werry true, most true, none but a eddicated man could 'ave
-made that 'ere hobservation. I likes yer for it. Give us yer 'and. The
-public just thinks too much of the stable, and not enough of what's inside.
-Leastways that's my experience of the public, and I 'ave been a-catering
-for the public ever since I was a growing lad--sides of bacon, ships on
-fire, good old ship on fire.... I knows the public. Yer don't follow me?'
-
-'Not quite.'
-
-'A moment, and I'll explain. You'll admit there's no blooming reason except
-the public's blooming hignorance why a man shouldn't do as good a picture
-on the pavement as on a piece of canvas, provided he 'ave the blooming
-genius. There is no doubt that with them 'ere chalks and a nice smooth
-stone that Raphael--I 'ave been to the National Gallery and 'ave studied
-'is work, and werry fine some of it is, although I don't altogether
-hold--but that's another matter. What was I a-saying of? I remember,--that
-with them 'ere chalks, and a nice smooth stone, there's no reason why a
-masterpiece shouldn't be done. That's right, ain't it? I ask you, as a man
-of eddication, to say if that ain't right; as a representative of the
-Press, I asks you to say.' Hubert nodded, and the pale-eyed man continued.
-'Well, that's what the public won't see, can't see. Raphael, says I, could
-'ave done a masterpiece with them 'ere chalks and a nice smooth stone. But
-do yer think 'e 'd 'ave been allowed? Do yer think the perlice would 'ave
-stood it? Do yer think the public would 'ave stood him doing masterpieces
-on the pavement? I'd give 'im just one afternoon. Them boys would 'ave got
-'im into trouble, just as they did me. Raphael would 'ave been told to wipe
-them out just as I was.'
-
-The conversation paused; and, half amused, half frightened, Hubert
-considered the pale vague face, and he was struck by the scattered look of
-aspiration that wandered in the pale blue eyes.
-
-'I'll tell you,' said the man, growing more excited, and leaning further
-across the table; 'I'll tell you, because I knows you for an eddicated man,
-and won't blab. S'pose yer thinks, like the rest of the world, that the
-chaps wot smears, for it ain't drawing, the pavement with bits of bacon, a
-ship on fire, and the regulation oysters, does them out of their own
-'eads?' Hubert nodded. 'I'm not surprised that you do, all the world do,
-and the public chucks down its coppers to the poor hartist; but 'e aint no
-hartist, no more than is them 'ere boys that did for my show.' Leaning
-still further forward, he lowered his voice to a whisper. 'They learns it
-all by 'art; there is schools for the teaching of it down in Whitechapel.
-They can just do what they learns by 'art, not one of them could draw that
-'ere chair or table from natur'; but I could. I 'ave an original talent. It
-was a long time afore I found out it was there,' he said, tapping his
-forehead; 'but it is there,' he said, fixing his eyes on Hubert, 'and when
-it is there they can't take it away--I mean my mates--though they do laugh
-at my ideas. They call me "the genius," for they don't believe in me, but I
-believe in myself, and they laughs best that laughs last.... I don't know,'
-he said, looking round him, his eyes full of reverie, 'that the public
-liked my fancy landscapes better than the ship on fire, but I said the
-public will come to them in time, and I continued my fancy landscapes. But
-one day in Trafalgar Square it came on to rain very 'eavy, and I went for
-shelter into the National Gallery. It was my fust visit, and I was struck
-all of a 'eap, and ever since I can 'ardly bring myself to go on with the
-drudgery of the piece of bacon, and the piece of cheese, with the mouse
-nibbling at it. And ever since my 'ead 'as been filled with other things,
-though for a long time I could not make exactly out what. I 'ave 'eard that
-that is always the case with men that 'as an idea--daresay you 'ave found
-it so yourself. So in my spare time I goes to the National to think it out,
-and in studying the pictures there I got wery interested in a chap called
-Hetty, and 'e do paint the female form divine. I says to myself, Why not go
-in for lovely woman? the public may not care for fancy landscapes, but the
-public allus likes a lovely woman, and, as well as being popular, lovely
-woman is 'igh 'art. So, after dinner hour, I sets to work, and sketches in
-a blue sea with three bathers, and two boxes, with the 'orse's head looking
-out from behind one of the boxes. For a fust attempt at the nude, I assure
-you--it ain't my way to blow my own trumpet, but I can say that the crowd
-that 'ere picture did draw was bigger than any that 'ad assembled about the
-bits o' bacon and ship-a-fire of all the other coves. 'Ad I been let alone,
-I should 'ave made my fortune, but the crowd was so big and the curiosity
-so great that it took the perlice all their time to keep the pavement from
-being blocked. It wasn't that the public didn't like it enough, it was that
-the public liked it too much, that was the reason of my misfortune.'
-
-'What do you mean?' said Hubert.
-
-'Well, yer see them boys was a-hawking their cheap toys in the
-neighbourhood, and when they got wind of my success they comes round to
-see, and they remains on account of the crowd. Pockets was picked, I don't
-say they wasn't, and the perlice turned rusty, and then a pious old gent
-comes along, and 'earing the remarks of them boys, which I admit wasn't
-nice, complains to the hauthorities, and I was put down! Now, what I wants
-to know is why my art should be made to suffer for the beastly-mindedness
-of them 'ere boys.'
-
-Hubert admitted that there seemed to be an injustice somewhere, and asked
-the artist if he had never tried again.
-
-'Try again? Should think I did. When once a man 'as tasted of 'igh art, he
-can't keep his blooming fingers out of it. It was impossible after the
-success of my bathers to go back to the bacon, so I thought I would
-circumvent the hauthorities. I goes to the National Gallery, makes a
-sketch, 'ere it is,' and after some fumbling in his breast pocket, he
-produced a greasy piece of paper, which he handed to Hubert. 'S'pose yer
-know the picture?' Hubert admitted that he did not. 'Well, that is a
-drawing from Gainsborough's celebrated picture of Medora a-washing of her
-feet.... But the perlice wouldn't 'ave it any more than my original, 'e
-said it was worse than the bathers at Margaret, and when I told the
-hignorant brute wot it was, 'e said he wanted no hargument, that 'e
-wouldn't 'ave it.'
-
-Hubert had noticed, during the latter part of the narrative, a look of
-dubious cunning twinkling in the pale eyes; but now this look died away,
-and the eyes resumed their habitual look of vague reverie.
-
-'I've been 'ad up before the Beak: from him I expected more enlightenment,
-but he, too, said 'e wouldn't 'ave it, and I got a month. But I'll beat
-them yet, the public is on my side, and if it worn't for them 'ere boys,
-I'd say that the public could be helevated. They calls me "the genius," and
-they is right.' Then something seemed to go out like a flame, the face grew
-dim, and changed expression. 'It is 'ere all right,' he said, no longer
-addressing Hubert, but speaking to himself, 'and since it is there, it must
-come out.'
-
-
-
-
-IV
-
-
-Hubert at last found himself obliged to write to Ford for an advance of
-money. But Ford replied that he would advance money only on the delivery of
-the completed manuscript. And the whole of one night, in a room hardly
-eight feet long, sitting on his bed, he strove to complete the fourth and
-fifth acts. But under the pressure of such necessity ideas died within him.
-And all through the night, and even when the little window, curtained with
-a bit of muslin hardly bigger than a pocket-handkerchief, had grown white
-with dawn, he sat gazing at the sheet of paper, his brain on fire, unable
-to think. Laying his pen down in despair, he thought of the thousands who
-would come to his aid if they only knew--if they only knew! And soon after
-he heard life beginning again in the little brick street. He felt that his
-brain was giving way, that if he did not find change, whatever it was, he
-must surely run raving mad. He had had enough of England, and would leave
-it for America, Australia--anywhere. He wanted change. The present was
-unendurable. How would he get to America? Perhaps a clerkship on board one
-of the great steamships might be obtained.
-
-The human animal in extreme misery becomes self-reliant, and Hubert hardly
-thought of making application to his uncle. The last time he had applied
-for help his letter had remained unanswered, and he now felt that he must
-make his own living or die. And, quite indifferent as to what might befall
-him, he walked next day to the Victoria Docks. He did not know where or how
-to apply for work, and he tired himself in fruitless endeavour. At last he
-felt he could strive with fate no longer, and wandered mile after mile,
-amused and forgetful of his own misery in the spectacle of the river--the
-rose sky, the long perspectives, the houses and warehouses showing in fine
-outline, and then the wonderful blue night gathering in the forest of masts
-and rigging. He was admirably patient. There was no fretfulness in his
-soul, nor did he rail against the world's injustice, but took his
-misfortunes with sweet gentleness.
-
-He slept in a public-house, and next day resumed his idle search for
-employment. The weather was mild and beautiful, his wants were simple, a
-cup of coffee and a roll, a couple of sausages, and the day passed in a
-sort of morose and passionless contemplation. He thought of everything and
-nothing, least of all of how he should find money for the morrow. When the
-day came, and the penny to buy a cup of coffee was wanting, he quite
-naturally, without giving it a second thought, engaged himself as a
-labourer, and worked all day carrying sacks of grain out of a vessel's
-hold. For a large part of his nature was patient and simple, docile as an
-animal's. There was in him so much that was rudimentary, that in accepting
-this burden of physical toil he was acting not in contradiction to, but in
-full and perfect harmony with, his true nature.
-
-But at the end of a week his health began to give way, and, like a man
-after a violent debauch, he thought of returning to a more normal
-existence. He had left the manuscript of his unfortunate play in the North.
-Had they destroyed it? The involuntary fear of the writer for his child
-made him smile. What did it matter? Clearly the first thing to do would be
-to write to the editor of _The Cosmopolitan_, and ask if he could find him
-some employment, something certain; writing occasional articles for
-newspapers, that he couldn't do.
-
-Hubert had saved twelve shillings. He would therefore be able to pay his
-landlady: he smiled--one of his landladies! The earlier debt was now
-hopelessly out of his reach, and seemed to represent a social plane from
-which he had for ever fallen. If he had succeeded in getting that play
-right, what a difference it would have made! He would have been able to do
-a number of things he had never done, things which he had always desired to
-do. He had desired above all to travel--to see France and Italy; to linger,
-to muse in the shadows of the world's past; and after this he had desired
-marriage, an English wife, an English home, beautiful children, leisure,
-the society of friends. A successful play would have given him all these
-things, and now his dream must remain for ever unrealised by him. He had
-sunk out of sight and hearing of such life.
-
-Rose was another; she might sink as he had sunk; she might never find the
-opportunity of realising her desire. How well she would have played that
-part! He knew what was in her. And now! What did his failure to write that
-play condemn him to? Heaven only knows, he did not wish to think. Strange,
-was it not strange?... A man of genius--many believed him a genius--and yet
-he was incapable of earning his daily bread otherwise than by doing the
-work of a navvy. Even that he could not do well, society had softened his
-muscles and effeminised his constitution. Indeed, he did not know what life
-fate had willed him for. He seemed to be out of place everywhere. His best
-chance was to try to obtain a clerkship. The editor of _The Cosmopolitan_
-might be able to do that for him; if he could not, far better it would be
-to leave a world in which he was _out of place_, and through no fault of
-his own--that was the hard part of it. Hard part! Nonsense! What does Fate
-know of our little rights and wrongs--or care? Her intentions are
-inscrutable; she watches us come and go, and gives no sign. Prayers are
-vain. The good man is punished, and the wicked is sent on his way
-rejoicing.
-
-In such mournful thought, his clothes stained and torn, with all the traces
-of a week's toil in the docks upon them, Hubert made his way round St.
-Paul's and across Holborn. As he was about to cross into Oxford Street, he
-heard some one accost him,--
-
-'Oh, Mr. Price, is that you?' It was Rose. 'Where have you been all this
-time?'
-
-She seemed so strange, so small, and so much alone in the great
-thoroughfare, that Hubert forgot all his own troubles in a sudden interest
-in this little mite. 'Where have you been hiding yourself?... It is lucky I
-met you. Don't you know that Ford has decided to revive _Divorce_?'
-
-'You don't mean it!'
-
-'Yes; Ford said that the last acts of _The Gipsy_ were not satisfactorily
-worked out, and as there was something wrong with that Hamilton Brown's
-piece, he has decided to revive _Divorce_. He says it never was properly
-played ... he thinks he'll make a hit in the husband's part, and I daresay
-he will. But I have been unfortunate again; I wanted the part of the
-adventuress. I really could play it. I don't look it, I know ... I have no
-weight, but I could play it for all that. The public mightn't see me in it
-at first, but in five minutes they would.'
-
-'And what part has he cast you for--the young girl?'
-
-'Of course; there's no other part. He says I look it; but what's the good
-of looking it when you don't feel it? If he had cast me for Mrs.
-Barrington, I should have had just the five minutes in the second act that
-I have been waiting for so long, and I should have just wiped Miss Osborne
-out, acted her off the stage.... I know I should; you needn't believe it if
-don't like, but I know I should.'
-
-Hubert wondered how any one could feel so sure of herself, and then he
-said, 'Yes, I think you could do just what you say.... How do you think
-Miss Osborne will play the part?'
-
-'She'll be correct enough; she'll miss nothing, and yet somehow she'll miss
-the whole thing. But you must go at once to Ford. He was saying only this
-morning that if you didn't turn up soon, he'd have to give up the idea.'
-
-'I can't go and see him to-night. You see what a state I'm in.'
-
-'You're rather dusty; where have you been? what have you been doing?'
-
-'I've been down at the dock.... I thought of going to America.'
-
-'Well, we'll talk about that another time. It doesn't matter if you are a
-bit dusty and worn-out-looking. Now that he's going to revive your play,
-he'll let you have some money. You might get a new hat, though. I don't
-know how much they cost, but I've five shillings; can you get one for
-that?'
-
-Hubert thanked her.
-
-'But you are not offended?'
-
-'Offended, my dear Rose! I shall be able to manage. I'll get a brush up
-somewhere.'
-
-'That's all right. Now I'm going to jump into that 'bus,' and she signed
-with her parasol to the conductor. 'Mind you see Ford to-night,' she cried;
-and a moment after he saw a small space of blue back seated against one of
-the windows.
-
-
-
-
-V
-
-
-There was much prophecy abroad. Stiggins' words, 'The piece never did, and
-never will draw money,' were evidently present in everybody's mind. They
-were visible in Ford's face, and more than once Hubert expected to hear
-that--on account of severe indisposition--Mr. Montague Ford has been
-obliged to indefinitely postpone his contemplated revival of Mr. Hubert
-Price's play _Divorce_. But, besides the apprehension that Stiggins'
-unfavourable opinion of his enterprise had engendered in him, Ford was
-obviously provoked by Hubert's reluctance to execute the alterations he had
-suggested. Night after night, sometimes until six in the morning, Hubert
-sat up considering them. Thanks to Ford's timely advance he was back in his
-old rooms in Fitzroy Street. All was as it had been. He was working at his
-play every evening, waiting for Rose's footsteps on the stairs. And yet a
-change had come into his life! He believed now that his feet were set on
-the way to fortune--that he would soon be happy.
-
-He stared at the bright flame of the lamp, he listened to the silence. The
-clock chimed sharply, and the windows were growing grey. Hubert had begun
-to drowse in his chair; but he had promised to rewrite the young girl's
-part, Ford having definitely refused to intrust Rose with the part of the
-adventuress. He was sorry for this. He believed that Rose had not only
-talent, but genius. Besides, they were friends, neighbours; he would like
-to give her a chance of distinguishing herself--the chance which she was
-seeking. All the time he could not but realise that, however he might
-accentuate and characterise the part of the sentimental girl, Rose would
-not be able to do much with it. To bring out her special powers something
-strange, wild, or tragic was required. But of what use thinking of what was
-not to be? Having made some alterations and additions he folded his papers
-up, and addressed them to Miss Massey. He wrote on a piece of paper that
-they were to be given to her at once, and that he was to be called at ten.
-There was a rehearsal at twelve.
-
-On the night of the first performance, Hubert asked Rose to dine in his
-rooms. Mr. Wilson proposed that they should have a roast chicken, and Annie
-was sent to fetch a bottle of champagne from the grocer's. Annie had been
-given a ticket for the pit. Mrs. Wilson was going to the upper boxes. Annie
-said,--
-
-'Why, you look as if you was going to a funeral, and not to a play. Why
-don't ye laugh?'
-
-In truth, Hubert and Rose were a little silent. Rose was thinking how she
-could say certain lines. She had said them right once at rehearsal, but had
-not since been able to reproduce to her satisfaction a certain effect of
-voice. Hubert was too nervous to talk. There was nothing in his mind but
-'Will the piece succeed? What shall I do if it fails?' He could give heed
-to nothing but himself, all the world seemed blotted out, and he suffered
-the pain of excessive self-concentration. Rose, on the other hand, had lost
-sight of herself, and existed almost unconsciously in the soul of another
-being. She was sometimes like a hypnotised spectator watching with foolish,
-involuntary curiosity the actions of one whom she had been bidden to watch.
-Then a little cloud would gather over her eyes, and then this other being
-would rise as if out of her very entrails and recreate her, fashioning her
-to its own image and likeness.
-
-She did not answer when she was spoken to, and when the question was
-repeated, she awoke with a little start. Dinner was eaten in morbid
-silence, with painful and fitful efforts to appear interested in each
-other. Walking to the theatre, they once took the wrong turning and had to
-ask the way. At the stage door they smiled painfully, nodded, glad to part.
-Hubert went up to Montague Ford's room. He found the comedian on a low
-stool, seated before a low table covered with brushes and cosmetics, in
-front of a triple glass.
-
-'My dear friend, do not trouble me now. I am thinking of my part.'
-
-Hubert turned to go.
-
-'Stay a moment,' cried the actor. 'You know when the husband meets the wife
-he has divorced?'
-
-Hubert remembered the moment referred to, and, with anxious, doubting eyes,
-the comedian sought from the author justification for some intonations and
-gestures which seemed to him to form part and parcel of the nature of the
-man whose drunkenness he had so admirably depicted on his face.
-
-'"_This is most unfortunate, very unlucky--very, my dear Louisa; but----_"
-
-'"_I am no longer obliged to bear with your insults; I can now defend
-myself against you._"
-
-[Illustration: "In the third row Harding stood talking to a young man."]
-
-'Now, is that your idea of the scene?'
-
-A pained look came upon Hubert's face. 'Don't question me now, my dear
-fellow. I cannot fix my attention. I can see, however, that your make-up is
-capital--you are the man himself.'
-
-The actor was satisfied, and in his satisfaction he said, 'I think it will
-be all right, old chap.'
-
-Hubert hoped to reach his box without meeting critics or authors. The
-serving-maids bowed and smiled,--he was the author of the play. 'They'll
-think still more of me if the notices are right,' he thought, as he hurried
-upstairs, and from behind the curtain of his box he peeped down and counted
-the critics who edged their way down the stalls. Harding stood in the third
-row talking to a young man. He said, 'You mean the woman with the black
-hair piled into a point, and fastened with a steel circlet. A face of
-sheep-like sensuality. Red lips and a round receding chin. A large bosom,
-and two thin arms showing beneath the opera cloak, which she has not yet
-thrown from her shoulders. I do not know her--_une laideur attirante_. Many
-a man might be interested in her. But do you see the woman in the
-stage-box? You would not believe it, but she is sixty, and has only just
-begun to speak of herself as an old woman. She kept her figure, and had an
-admirer when she was fifty-eight.'
-
-'What has become of him?'
-
-'They quarrelled; two years ago he told her he hoped never to see her ugly
-old face again. And that delicate little creature in the box next to
-her--that pale diaphanous face?'
-
-'With a young man hanging over her whispering in her ear?'
-
-'Yes. She hates the theatre; it gives her neuralgia; but she attends all
-the first nights because her one passion is to be made love to in public.
-If her admirer did not hang over her in front of the box just as that man
-is doing, she would not tolerate him for a week.'
-
-At that moment the conversation was interrupted by a new-comer, who asked
-if he had seen the play when it was first produced.
-
-'Yes,' said Harding; 'I did.' And he continued his search for acquaintances
-amid white rows of female backs, necks, and half-seen profiles--amid the
-black cloth shoulders cut sharply upon the illumined curtain.
-
-'And what do you think of it? Do you think it will succeed this time?'
-
-'Ford will create an impression in the part; but I don't think the piece
-will run.'
-
-'And why? Because the public is too stupid?'
-
-'Partly, and partly because Price is only an intentionist. He cannot carry
-an idea quite through.'
-
-'Are you going to write about it?'
-
-'I may.'
-
-'And what will you say?'
-
-'Oh, most interesting things to be said. Let's take the case of Hubert
-Price ... Ah, there, the curtain is going up.'
-
-The curtain rolled slowly up, and in a small country drawing-room, in very
-simple but very pointedly written dialogue, the story of Mrs. Holmes'
-domestic misfortunes was gradually unfolded. It appeared that she had
-flirted with Captain Grey; he had written her some compromising letters,
-and she had once been to his rooms alone. So the Court had pronounced a
-decree _nisi_. But Mrs. Holmes had not been unfaithful to her husband. She
-had flirted with Captain Grey because her husband's attentions to a certain
-Mrs. Barrington had maddened her, and in her jealous rage had written
-foolish letters, and been to see Captain Grey.
-
-Hubert noticed that folk were still asking for their seats, and pushing
-down the very rows in which the most influential critics were sitting. They
-exchanged a salutation with their friends in the dress-circle, and, when
-they were seated, looked around, making observations regarding the
-appearance of the house; and all the while the actors were speaking. Hubert
-trembled with fear and rage. Would these people never give their attention
-to the stage? If they had been sitting by him, he could have struck them.
-Then a line turned into nonsense by the actress who played Mrs. Holmes was
-a lancinating pain; and the actor who played Captain Grey, played so slowly
-that Hubert could hardly refrain from calling from his box. He looked round
-the theatre, noticing the indifferent faces of the critics, and the women's
-shoulders seemed to him especially vacuous and imbecile.
-
-The principal scene of the second act was between Mrs. Holmes and the man
-who had divorced her. He has-been driven to drink by the vile behaviour of
-his second wife; he is ruined in health and in pocket, and has come to the
-woman he wronged to beg forgiveness; he knows she has learnt to love
-Captain Grey, but will not marry him, because she believes that once
-married always married. There is only one thing he can do to repair the
-wrong he has done--he will commit suicide, and so enable her to marry the
-man she loves. He tells her that he has bought the pistol to do it with,
-and the words, 'Not here! not here!' escape from her; and he answers, 'No,
-not here, but in a cab. I've got one at the door.' He goes out; Captain
-Grey enters, and Mrs. Holmes begs him to save her husband. While they are
-discussing how this is to be done, he re-enters, saying that his conscience
-smote him as he was going to pull the trigger. Will she forgive him? If she
-won't, he must make an end of himself. She says she will.
-
-In the third act Hubert had attempted to paint Mr. Holmes' vain efforts to
-reform his life. But the constant presence of Captain Grey in the
-household, his attempts to win Mrs. Holmes from her husband, and the
-drunken husband's amours with the servant-maid disgusted rather than
-horrified. In the fourth act the wretched husband admits that his
-reformation is impossible, and that, although he has no courage to commit
-suicide and set his wife free, he will return to his evil courses; they
-will sooner or later make an end of him. The slowness and deadly gravity
-with which Ford took this scene rendered it intolerable; and,
-notwithstanding the beauty of the conclusion, when the deserted wife, in
-the silence of her drawing-room, reads again Captain Grey's letter, telling
-her that he has left England for ever, and with another, the success of the
-play was left in doubt, and the audience filed out, talking, chattering,
-arguing, wondering what the public verdict would be.
-
-To avoid commiseration of heartless friends and the triumphant glances of
-literary enemies, Hubert passed through the door leading on to the stage.
-Scene-shifters were brutally pushing away what remained of his play; and
-the presence of Hamilton Brown, the dramatic author, talking to Ford, was
-at that moment particularly disagreeable. On catching sight of Hubert,
-Brown ran to him, shook him by the hand, and murmured some discreet
-congratulations. He preferred the piece, however, as it had been originally
-written, and suggested to Ford the advisability of returning to the first
-text. Then Ford went upstairs to take his paint off, and Hubert walked
-about the stage with Brown. Brown's insincerity was sufficiently
-transparent; but men in Hubert's position catch at straws, and he soon
-began to believe that the attitude of the public towards his play was not
-so unfavourable as he had imagined.
-
-Hubert tried to summon up a smile for the stage-door keeper, who, he
-feared, had heard that the piece had failed, and then the moment they got
-outside he begged Rose to tell him the exact truth. She assured him that
-Ford had said that he had always counted on a certain amount of opposition;
-but that he believed that the general public, being more free of prejudice
-and less sophisticated, would be impressed by the simple humanity of the
-play. The conversation paused, and at the end of an irritating silence he
-said, 'You were excellent, as good as any one could be in a part that did
-not suit them. Ah, if he had cast you for the adventuress, how you would
-have played it!...'
-
-'I'm so glad you are pleased. I hope my notices will be good. Do you think
-they will?'
-
-'Yes, your notices will be all right,' he answered, with a sigh.
-
-'And your notices will be all right too. No one can say what is going to
-succeed. There was a call after each of the last three acts.... I don't see
-how a piece could go better. It is the suspense....'
-
-'Ah, yes, the suspense!'
-
-They lingered on the landing, and Hubert said, 'Won't you come in for a
-moment?' She followed him into the room. His calm face, usually a perfect
-picture of repose and self-possession, betrayed his emotion by a certain
-blankness in the eyes, certain contractions in the skin of the forehead.
-'I'm afraid,' he said, 'there's no hope.'
-
-'Oh, you mustn't say that!' she replied. 'I think it went very well
-indeed.... I know I did nothing with the young girl. I oughtn't to have
-undertaken the part.'
-
-'You were excellent. If we only get some good notices. If we don't, I shall
-never get another play of mine acted.' He looked at her imploringly,
-thirsting for a woman's sympathy. But the little girl was thinking of
-certain effects which she would have made, and which the actress who had
-played the adventuress had failed to make.
-
-'I watched her all the time,' she said, 'following every line, saying all
-the time, "Oh yes, that's all very nice and very proper, my young woman;
-but it's not it; no, not at all--not within a hundred miles of it." I don't
-think she ever really touched the part--do you?' Hubert did not answer, and
-a quiver of distraction ran through the muscles of her face.
-
-'Why don't you answer me?'
-
-'I can't answer you,' he said abruptly. Then remembering, he added,
-'Forgive me; I can think of nothing now.' He hid his face in his hands, and
-sobbed twice--two heavy, choking sobs, pregnant with the weight of anguish
-lying on his heart.
-
-Seeing how much he suffered, she laid her hand on his shoulder. 'I am very
-sorry; I wish I could help you. I know how it tears the heart when one
-cannot get out what one has in one's brain.'
-
-Her artistic appreciation of his suffering only jarred him the more. What
-he longed for was some kind, simple-hearted woman who would say, 'Never
-mind, dear; the play was perfectly right, only they did not understand it;
-I love you better than ever.' But Rose could not give him the sympathy he
-wanted; and to be alone was almost a relief. He dared not go to bed; he sat
-looking into space. The roar of London hushed till it was no more than a
-faint murmur, the hissing of the gas grew louder, and still Hubert sat
-thinking, the same thoughts battling in his brain. He looked into the
-future, but could see nothing but suicide. His uncle? He had applied to him
-before for help; there was no hope there. Then he tramped up and down,
-maddened by the infernal hissing of the gas; and then threw himself into
-his arm-chair. And so a terrible night wore away; and it was not until long
-after the early carts had begun to rattle in the streets that exhaustion
-brought an end to his sufferings, and he rolled into bed.
-
-
-
-
-VI
-
-
-'What will ye 'ave to eat? Eggs and bacon?'
-
-'No, no!'
-
-'Well, then, 'ave a chop?'
-
-'No, no!'
-
-'Ye must 'ave something.'
-
-'A cup of tea, a slice of toast. I'm not hungry.'
-
-'Well, ye are worse than a young lady for a happetite. Miss Massey 'as sent
-you down these 'ere papers.'
-
-The servant-girl laid the papers on the bed, and Hubert lay back on his
-pillow, so that he might collect his thoughts. Stretching forth his hands,
-he selected the inevitable paper.
-
-'For those who do not believe that our English home life is composed
-mainly, if not entirely, of lying, drunkenness, and conjugal infidelity,
-and its sequel divorce, yester evening at the Queen's Theatre must have
-been a sad and dismal experience. That men and women who have vowed to love
-each other do sometimes prove false to their troth no reasonable man will
-deny. With the divorce court before our eyes, even the most enthusiastic
-believer in the natural goodness and ultimate perfectibility of human
-nature must admit that men and women are frail. But drunkenness and
-infidelity are happily not characteristic of our English homes. Then why,
-we ask, should a dramatist select such a theme, and by every artifice of
-dialogue force into prominence all that is mean and painful in an
-unfortunate woman's life? Always the same relentless method; the cold,
-passionless curiosity of the vivisector; the scalpel is placed under the
-nerve, and we are called upon to watch the quivering flesh. Never the kind
-word, the tears, the effusion, which is man's highest prerogative, and
-which separates him from the brute and signifies the immortal end for which
-he was created. We hold that it is a pity to see so much talent wasted, and
-it was indeed a melancholy sight to see so many capable actors and
-actresses labouring to----'
-
-'This is even worse than usual,' said Hubert; and glancing through half a
-column of hysterical commonplace, he came upon the following:--
-
-'But if this woman had succeeded in reclaiming from vice the man who
-unjustly divorced her, and who in his misery goes back to ask her
-forgiveness for pity's sake, what a lesson we should have had! And, with
-lightened and not with heavier hearts, we should have left the theatre
-comforted, better and happier men and women. But turning his back on the
-goodness, truth, and love whither he had induced us to believe he was
-leading us, the author flagrantly makes the woman contradict her whole
-nature in the last act; and, because her husband falls again, she, instead
-of raising him with all the tender mercies and humanities of wifehood,
-declares that her life has been one long mistake, and that she accepts the
-divorce which the Court had unjustly granted. The moral, if such a word may
-be applied to such a piece is this: "The law may be bad, but human nature
-is worse."'
-
-The other morning papers took the same view,--a great deal of talent wasted
-on a subject that could please no one. Hubert threw the papers aside, lay
-back, and in the lucid idleness of the bed his thoughts grew darker. It was
-hardly possible that the piece could survive such notices; and if it did
-not? Well, he would have to go. But until the piece was taken out of the
-bills it would be a weakness to harbour the ugly thought.
-
-There were, however, the evening papers to look forward to, and soon after
-midday Annie was sent to buy all that had appeared. Hubert expected to find
-in these papers a more delicate appreciation of his work. Many of the
-critics of the evening press were his personal friends, and nearly all were
-young men in full sympathy with the new school of dramatic thought. He read
-paper after paper with avidity; and Annie was sent in a cab to buy one that
-had not yet found its way so far north as Fitzroy Street. The opinion of
-this paper was of all importance, and Hubert tore it open with trembling
-fingers. Although more temperately written than the others, it was clearly
-favourable, and Hubert sighed a sweet sigh of relief. A weight was lifted
-from him; the world suddenly seemed to grow brighter; and he went to the
-theatre that evening, and, half doubting and half confidently, presented
-himself at the door of Montague Ford's dressing-room. The actor had not yet
-begun to dress, and was busy writing letters. He stretched his hand
-hurriedly to Hubert.
-
-'Excuse me, my dear fellow; I have a couple of letters to finish.'
-
-Hubert sat down, glancing nervously from the actor to the morning papers
-with which the table was strewn. There was not an evening paper there. Had
-he not seen them? At the end of about ten minutes the actor said,--
-
-'Well, this is a bad business; they are terribly down on us--aren't they?
-What do you think?'
-
-'Have you seen the evening papers--_The Telephone_, for instance?'
-
-'Oh yes, I've seen them all; but the evening papers don't amount to much.
-Stiggins's article was terrible. I am afraid he has killed the piece.'
-
-'Don't you think it will run, then?'
-
-'Well, that depends upon the public, of course. If they like it, I'll keep
-it on.'
-
-'How's the booking?'
-
-'Not good.' Montague Ford moved his papers absent-mindedly. At the end of a
-long silence he said, 'Even if the piece did catch on, it would take a lot
-of working up to undo the mischief of those articles. Of course you can
-rely on me to give it every chance. I shan't take it out of the bills if I
-can possibly help.'
-
-'There is my _Gipsy_.'
-
-'I have another piece ready to put into rehearsal; it was arranged for six
-months ago. I only consented to produce your play because--well, because
-there has been such an outcry lately about art.... Tremendous part for me
-in the new piece... I'm sure you'll like it.'
-
-The business did improve, but so very slowly that Hubert was afraid Ford
-would lose patience and take the play out of the bills. But while the fate
-of the play hung in the balance, Hubert's life was being rendered
-unbearable by duns. They had found him out, one and all; to escape being
-served was an impossibility; and now his table was covered with summonses
-to appear at the County Court. This would not matter if the piece once took
-the public taste. Then he would be able to pay every one, and have some
-time to rest and think. And there seemed every prospect of its catching on.
-Discussions regarding the morality of the play had arisen in the
-newspapers, and the eternal question whether men and women are happier
-married or unmarried had reached its height. Hubert spent the afternoon
-addressing letters to the papers, striving to fan the flame of controversy.
-Every evening he listened for Rose's footstep on the stairs.--How did the
-piece go?--Was there a better house? Money or paper?--Have you seen the
-notice in the ----?--First-rate, wasn't it?--That ought to do some
-good.--I've heard there was a notice in the ----, but I haven't seen it.
-Have you?--No; but So-and-so saw the paper, and said there was nothing in
-it. And, do you know, I hear there's going to be a notice in _The Modern
-Review_, and that So-and-so is writing it.
-
-Every post brought newspapers; the room was filled with newspapers--all
-kinds of newspapers--papers one has never heard of,--French papers, Welsh
-papers, North of England papers, Scotch and Irish papers. Hubert read
-columns about himself, anecdotes of all kinds,--where he was born, who were
-his parents, and what first induced him to attempt writing for the stage;
-his personal appearance, mode of life, the cut of his clothes; his
-religious, moral, and political views. Had he been the plaintiff in an
-action for criminal libel, greater industry in the collection and the
-fabrication of personal details could hardly have been displayed.
-
-But at these articles Hubert only glanced; he was interested in his piece,
-not in himself, and when Annie brought up _The Modern Review_ he tore it
-open, knowing he would find there criticism more fundamental, more
-searching. But as he read, the expression of hope which his face wore
-changed to one of pain pitiful to look upon. The article began with a
-sketch of the general situation, and in a tone of commiseration, of
-benevolent malice, the writer pointed out how inevitable it was that the
-critics should have taken Mr. Price, when _Divorce_ was first produced, for
-the new dramatic genius they were waiting for. 'There comes a moment,' said
-this caustic writer, 'in the affairs of men when the new is not only
-eagerly accepted, but when it is confounded with the original. Wearied by
-the old stereotyped form of drama, the critics had been astonished by a
-novelty of subject, more apparent than real, and by certain surface
-qualities in the execution; they had hailed the work as being original both
-in form and in matter, whereas all that was good in the play had been
-borrowed from France and Scandinavia. _Divorce_ was the inevitable product
-of the time. It had been written by Mr. Price, but it might have been
-written by a dozen other young men--granting intelligence, youth, leisure,
-a university education, and three or four years of London life--any one of
-a dozen clever young men who frequent West End drawing-rooms and dabble in
-literature might have written it. All that could be said was that the play
-was, or rather had been, _dans le mouvement_; and original work never is
-_dans le mouvement_. _Divorce_ was nothing more than the product of certain
-surroundings, and remembering Mr. Price's other plays, there seemed to be
-no reason to believe that he would do better. Mr. Price had tried his hand
-at criticism, and that was a sure sign that the creative faculty had begun
-to wither. His critical essays were not rich nor abundant in thought, they
-were not the skirmishing of a man fighting for his ideas, they were not
-preliminary to a great battle; they were at once vague and pedantic,
-somewhat futile, _les ébats d'un esprit en peine_, and seemed to announce
-a talent in progress of disintegration rather than of reconstruction.
-
-'Sometimes the critic's phrases seemed wet with tears; sometimes,
-abandoning his tone of commiseration, he would assume one of scientific
-indifference. The phenomenon was the commonest. There were dozens of Hubert
-Prices in London. The universities and the newspapers, working singly and
-in collaboration, turned them out by the dozen. And the mission of these
-men of intelligent culture seemed to be to _poser des lapins sur la jeune
-presse_. Each one came in turn with his little volume of poems, his little
-play, his little picture; all were men of "advanced ideas"; in other words,
-they were all _dans le mouvement_. There was the rough Hubert Price, who
-made mild consternation in the drawing-room, and there was the
-sophisticated Hubert Price, who cajoled the drawing-room; there was the
-sincere and the insincere, and the Price that suffered and the Price that
-didn't. Each one brought a different _nuance_, a thousand infinitesimal
-variations of the type, but, considered merely in its relation to art, the
-species may be said to be divided into two distinct categories. In the
-first category are those who rise almost at the first bound to a certain
-level, who produce quickly, never reaching again the original standard,
-dropping a little lower at each successive effort until their work becomes
-indistinguishable from the ordinary artistic commercialism of the time. The
-fate of those in the second category is more pathetic; they gradually
-wither and die away like flowers planted in a thin soil. Among these men
-many noble souls are to be found, men who have surrendered all things for
-love of their art, and who seemed at starting to be the best equipped to
-win, but who failed, impossible to tell how or why. Sometimes their failure
-turns to comedy, sometimes to tragedy. They may become refined, delicate,
-elderly bachelors, the ornaments of drawing-rooms, professional
-diners-out--men with brilliant careers behind them. But if fate has not
-willed that they should retire into brilliant shells; if chance does not
-allow them to retreat, to separate themselves from their kind, but
-arbitrarily joins them to others, linking their fate to the fate of others'
-unhappiness, disaster may and must accrue from the alliance; honesty of
-purpose, trueness of heart, deep love, every great, good, and gracious
-quality to be found in nature, will not suffice to save them.'
-
-The paper dropped from his hands, and he recollected all his failures.
-
-'Once I could do good work; now I can do neither good work nor bad. Were I
-a rich man, I should collect my scattered papers and write songs to be sung
-in drawing-rooms; but being a poor one, I must--I suppose I must get out.
-Positively, there is no hope,--debts on every side. Fate has willed me to
-go as went Haydon, Gerard de Nerval, and Maréchal. The first cut his
-throat, the second hanged himself, and the third blew out his brains.
-Clearly the time has come to consider how I shall make my exit. It is a
-little startling to be called upon so peremptorily to go.'
-
-In this moment of extreme dejection it seemed to Hubert that the writer of
-the article had told him the exact truth. He refused to admit the plea of
-poverty. It was of course hard to write when one is being harassed by
-creditors. But if he had had it in him, it would have come out. The critic
-had very probably told him the truth. He could not hope to make a living
-out of literature. He had not the strength to write the masterpiece which
-the perverse cruelty of nature had permitted him only to see, and he was
-hopelessly unfit for journalism. But in his simple, wholesome mind there
-was no bent towards suicide; and he scanned every horizon. Once again he
-thought of his uncle. Five years ago he had written, asking him for the
-loan of a hundred pounds. He had received ten. And how vain it would be to
-write a second time! A few pounds would only serve to prolong his misery.
-No; he would not drift from degradation to degradation.
-
-He only glanced at the letter which Annie had brought up with the copy of
-_The Modern Review_. It was clearly a lawyer's letter. Should he open it?
-Why not spare himself the pain? He could alter nothing; and in these last
-days---- Leaving the thought unfinished, he sought for his keys; he went to
-his box, unlocked it, and took out a small paper package. Of the fifty
-pounds he had received from Ford about twenty remained: he had been poorer
-before, but hardly quite so hopeless. He scanned every horizon--all were
-barred. The thought of suicide, and with it the instinctive shrinking from
-it, came into his mind again. Suppose he took, that very night, an overdose
-of chloral? He tried to put the thought from him, and returned, a little
-dazed and helpless, to his chair. Had the critic in _The Modern Review_
-told him the truth? Was he incapable of earning a living? It seemed so.
-Above all, was he incapable of finishing _The Gipsy_ as he intended? No;
-that he felt was a lie. Give him six months' quiet, free from worry and all
-anxiety, and he would do it. Many a year had passed since he had enjoyed a
-month of quiet; and glancing again at the letter on the table, he thought
-that perhaps at that very moment a score of gallery boys were hissing his
-play. Perhaps at that very moment Ford was making up his mind to announce
-the last six nights of _Divorce_. At a quarter to twelve he heard Rose's
-foot on the stairs. He opened the door.
-
-'How did the piece go to-night?'
-
-'Pretty well.'
-
-'Only pretty well? Won't you come in for a few minutes?... So the piece
-didn't go very well to-night?'
-
-'Oh yes, it did. I've seen it go better; but----'
-
-'Did you get a call?'
-
-'Yes, after the second act.'
-
-'Not after the third?'
-
-'No. That act never goes well. Harding came behind; I was speaking to him,
-and he said something which struck me as being very true. Ford, he said,
-plays the part a great deal too seriously. When the piece was first
-produced, it was played more good-humouredly by indifferent actors, who let
-the thing run without trying to bring out every point. Ford makes it as
-hard as nails. I think those were his exact words.'
-
-Hubert did not answer. At the end of a long silence he said,--
-
-'Did you hear anything about the last night's?'
-
-'No,' she said; 'I heard nothing of that.'
-
-'Ford appeared quite satisfied then?'
-
-'Yes, quite,' she answered, with difficulty; for his eyes were fixed on
-her, and she felt he knew she was not telling the truth. The conversation
-paused again, and to turn it into another channel she said, 'Why, you have
-not opened your letter!'
-
-'I can see it is a lawyer's letter, on account of some unpaid bill. If I
-could pay it, I would; but as I can't----'
-
-'You are afraid to open it,' said Rose.
-
-Ashamed of his weakness, Hubert opened the letter, and began to read. Rose
-saw that the letter was not such an one as he had expected, and a moment
-after his face told her that fortunate news had come to him. The signs of
-the tumult within were represented by the passing of the hand across the
-brow, as if to brush aside some strange hallucination, and the sudden
-coming of a vague look of surprise and fear into the eyes. He said,--
-
-'Read it! Read it!'
-
-Relieved of much detail and much cumbersome legal circumlocution, it was to
-the following effect:--That about three months ago Mr. Burnett had come up
-from his place in Sussex, and at the offices of Messrs. Grandly & Co. had
-made a will, in which he had disinherited his adopted daughter, Miss Emily
-Watson, and left everything to Mr. Hubert Price. There was no question as
-to the validity of the will; but Messrs. Grandly deemed it their duty to
-inform Mr. Hubert Price of the circumstances under which it had been made,
-and also of the fact that a few weeks before his death Mr. Burnett had told
-Mr. John Grandly, who was then staying with Mr. Burnett at Ashwood, that he
-intended adding a codicil, leaving some two or three hundred a year to Miss
-Watson. It was unfortunate that Mr. Burnett had not had time to do this;
-for Miss Watson was an orphan, eighteen years of age, and entirely
-unprovided for. Messrs. Grandly begged to submit these facts to the
-consideration of Mr. Hubert Price. Miss Watson was now residing at Ashwood.
-She was there with a friend of hers, Mrs. Bentley; and should Mr. Hubert
-Price feel inclined to do what Mr. Burnett had left undone, Messrs. Grandly
-would have very great pleasure in carrying his wishes into effect.
-
-'I'm not dreaming, am I?'
-
-'No, you are not. It is quite true. Your uncle has left his money to you. I
-am so glad; indeed I am. You will be able to finish your play, and take a
-theatre and produce it yourself if you like. I hope you won't forget me. I
-do want to play that part. You can't quite know what I shall do with it.
-One can't explain oneself in a scene here and there.... What are you
-thinking of?'
-
-'I'm thinking of that poor girl, Emily Watson. It comes very hard upon
-her.'
-
-'Who is she?'
-
-'The girl my uncle disinherited.'
-
-'Oh, she! Well, you can marry her if you like. That would not be a bad
-notion. But if you do, you'll forget all about me and Lady Hayward.'
-
-'No; I shall never forget you, Rose.' He stretched his hand to her; but,
-irrespective of his will, the gesture seemed full of farewell.
-
-'I'm so much obliged to you,' he said; 'had it not been for you, I might
-never have opened that letter.'
-
-'Even if you hadn't, it wouldn't have mattered; you would have heard of
-your good fortune some other way. But it is getting very late. I must say
-good-night. I hope you will have a pleasant time in the country, and will
-finish your play. Good-night.'
-
-Returning from the door, he stopped to think. 'We have been very good
-friends--that is all. How strangely determined she is!... More so than I
-am. She is bound to succeed. There is in her just that note of individual
-passion.... Perhaps some one will find her out before I have
-finished,--that would be a pity. I wonder which of us will succeed first?'
-
-Then the madness of good fortune came upon him suddenly; he could think no
-more of Rose, and had to go for a long walk in the streets.
-
-
-
-
-VII
-
-
-'Dearest Emily, you must prepare yourself for the worst.'
-
-'Is he dead?'
-
-'Yes; he passed away quite quietly. To look at him one would say he was
-asleep; he does not appear to have suffered at all.'
-
-'Oh, Julia, Julia, do you think he forgave me? I could not do what he asked
-me.... I loved him very dearly as a father, but I could not have married
-him.'
-
-'No, dear, you could not. Such a marriage would have been most unnatural;
-he was more than forty years older than you.'
-
-'I do not think he ever thought of such a thing until about a month or six
-weeks ago. You remember how I ran to you? I was as white as a ghost, and I
-trembled like a leaf. I could hardly speak.... You remember?'
-
-'Yes, I remember; and some hours after, when I came into this room, he was
-standing there, just there, on the hearth-rug; there was a fearful look of
-pain and despair on his face--he looked as if he was going mad. I never saw
-such a look before, and I never wish to see such a look again. And the
-effort he made to appear unconcerned when he saw me was perhaps the worst
-part of it. I pretended to see nothing, and walked away towards the window
-and looked out. But all the while I could feel that some terrible drama was
-passing behind me. At last I had to look round. He was sitting in that
-chair, his elbows on his knees, clasping his head with both hands, the old,
-gnarled fingers twined in the iron-grey hair. Then, unable to contain
-himself any longer, he rushed out of the room, out of the house, and across
-the park.'
-
-'You say that he passed away quietly; he did not seem to suffer at all?'
-
-'No, he never recovered consciousness.'
-
-'But do you think that my refusal to marry him had anything to do with his
-death?'
-
-'Oh no, Emily; a fit of apoplexy, with a man of his age, generally ends
-fatally.'
-
-'Even if I had known it all beforehand I don't think I could have acted
-differently. I could not have married him. Indeed I couldn't, Julia, not
-even if I knew I should save his life by doing so. I daresay it is very
-wicked of me, but----'
-
-'Dearest Emily, you must not give way to such thoughts; you did quite right
-in refusing to marry Mr. Burnett. It was very wrong of him even to think of
-asking you, and if he had lived he would have seen how wrong it was of him
-to desire such a thing.'
-
-'If he had lived! But then he didn't live, not even long enough to forgive
-me, and when we think of how much he suffered--I don't mean in dying, you
-say he passed away quietly, but all this last month how heart-broken he
-looked! You remember when he sat at the head of the table, never speaking
-to us, and how frightened I was lest I should meet him on the stairs; I
-used to stand at the door of my room, afraid to move. I know he suffered,
-poor old man. I was very, very sorry for him. Indeed I was, Julia, for I'm
-not selfish, and when I think now that he died without forgiving me, I
-feel, I feel--oh, I feel as if I should like to die myself. Why do such
-things happen to me? I feel just as miserable now as I used to when I lived
-with father and mother, who could not agree. I have often told you how
-miserable I was then, but I don't think you ever quite understood. I feel
-just the same now, just as if I never wanted to see any one or anything
-again. I was so unhappy when I was a child, they thought I would die, and I
-should have died if I had remained listening to father and mother any
-longer. ... Every one thought I was so lucky when Mr. Burnett decided to
-adopt me and leave me all his money, and he has done that, poor old man, so
-I suppose I should be happy; but I'm not.'
-
-The girl's eyes turned instinctively towards the window and rested for a
-moment on the fair, green prospects of the park.
-
-'I hated to listen to father and mother quarrelling, but I loved them, and
-I had not been here a year before father died, and darling mother was not
-long following him--only six months. Then I had no one: a few distant
-relatives, whom I knew nothing of, whom I did not care for, so I gave all
-my love to Mr. Burnett. He was so good to me; he never denied me anything;
-he gave me everything, even you, dearest Julia. When he thought I wanted a
-companion, he found you for me. I learnt to love you. You became my best
-and dearest friend. Then things seemed to brighten up, and I thought I was
-happy, when all this dreadful trouble came upon us. Don't let's speak of it
-more than we can help. I often wished myself dead. Didn't you, Julia?'
-
-Emily Watson told the story of her misfortunes in a low, musical voice,
-heedless of two or three interruptions, hardly conscious of her listener,
-impressed and interested by the fatality of circumstances which she
-believed in design against her. She was a small, slender girl of about
-eighteen. Her abundant chestnut hair--exquisite, soft, and silky--was
-looped picturesquely, and fastened with a thin tortoiseshell comb. The tiny
-mouth trembled, and the large, prominent eyes reflected a strange, yearning
-soul. She was dressed in white muslin, and the fantastically small waist
-was confined with a white band. Her friend and companion, Julia Bentley,
-was a woman of about thirty, well above the medium height, full-bosomed and
-small-waisted. The type was Anglo-Saxon even to commonplace. The face was
-long, with a look of instinctive kindness upon it. She was given to
-staring, and as she looked at Emily, her blue eyes filled with an
-expression which told of a nature at once affectionate and intelligent. She
-was dressed in yellow linen, and wore a gold bracelet on a well-turned arm.
-
-The room was a long, old-fashioned drawing-room. It had three windows, and
-all three were filled with views of the park, now growing pale in the
-evening air. The flower-gardens were drawn symmetrically about the house
-and were set with blue flower-vases in which there were red geraniums. It
-was a very large room, nearly forty feet long, with old portraits on the
-walls--ugly things and ill done; and where there were no portraits the
-walls were decorated with vine leaves and mountains. The parqueted floor
-was partially covered with skins, and the furniture seemed to have known
-many a generation; some of it was heavy and cumbersome, some of it was
-modern. There was a grand piano, and above it two full-length portraits--a
-lady in a blue dress and a man in black velvet knee-breeches. At the end of
-a long silence, Emily suddenly threw herself weeping into Julia's arms.
-
-'Oh, you are my only friend; you will not leave me now.... We shall always
-love one another, shall we not? If anything ever came between us it would
-kill me.... That poor old man lying dead up-stairs! He loved me very
-dearly, and I loved him, too. Yet I said just now I could not have married
-him even if I had known it would save his life. I was wrong; yes, I would
-have married him if I had known.... You don't believe me?'
-
-'My dearest girl, you must try to forget that Mr. Burnett ever entertained
-so foolish a thought. He was a very good man, and loved you for a long time
-as he should have loved you--as a daughter. We shall respect his memory
-best by forgetting the events of the last six weeks. And now, Emily, dinner
-will be ready at seven o'clock, and it is now six. What are you going to
-do?'
-
-'I shall go out for a little walk. I shall go down and see the swans.'
-
-'Shall I come with you?'
-
-'No, thank you, dear; I think I'd sooner be alone. I want to think.'
-
-Julia looked a moment anxiously at this fragile girl, whose tiny head was
-poised on a long, delicate neck like a fruit on its stem.
-
-'Yes, go for a walk, dear,' said Julia; 'it will do you good. Shall I go
-and fetch your hat and jacket?'
-
-'No, thank you, I will not trouble you; I'll go myself.'
-
-'No, Emily, I think you had better let me go.'
-
-'Oh, no; I am not afraid.'
-
-And she went up the wide oak staircase, thinking of the man who lay dead in
-the room at the end of the passage. She was conscious of a sense of dread;
-the house seemed to wear a strange air, and her dog, Dandy, was conscious
-of it, too; he was more silent, less joyful than usual. And when she came
-from her room, dressed to go out, instead of rushing down-stairs, barking
-with joy, he dropped his tail and lingered at the end of the passage. She
-called him; he still hesitated, and then, yielding to a sudden desire, she
-went down the passage and knocked at the door of the room. The nurse
-answered her knock.
-
-'Oh, don't come in, miss.'
-
-'Why not? I want to see him before he goes away for ever.'
-
-Upon the limp, white curtains of an old four-posted bed she saw the
-memorable profile--stern, unrelenting. How still he lay! Never would that
-face speak or laugh or see again. Although sixty-five, his head was covered
-with short, thick, iron-grey hair; the beard, too, was short and thick, and
-iron-grey. The face was rugged, and when Emily touched the coarse hand,
-telling of a life of toil, she started--it was singularly cold. Fear and
-sorrow in like measure choked her, and her soul awoke, and tremblingly she
-walked out of the house, glad to breathe the sweet evening air.
-
-She walked towards the artificial water. The sky was melancholy and grey,
-and the park lay before her, hushed and soundless. Through the shadows of
-the darkening island two swans floated softly, leaving behind slight silver
-lines; above, the swallows flew high in the evening. There was sensation of
-death, too, in this cold, mournful water, and in the silence that hung
-about it, and in some vague way it reminded Emily of her own life. She had
-known little else but death; her life seemed full of death; and those
-reflections, so distinct and so colourless, were like death.
-
-Then, in a sudden expansion of youth she wondered. Her own life, how
-strange, how personal, how intense! What did it mean, what meaning had it
-in the great, wide world? And the impressive tranquillity, the pale death
-of the day, lying like a flower on the water, seemed to symbolise her
-thought, and she felt more distinctly than she had ever done before. And
-there arose in her a nervous and passionate interest in herself. She seemed
-so strange, so wonderful. Her childhood was in itself an enigma. That sad
-and sorrowful childhood of hers, passed in that old London house; her
-mother's love for her; her cruel, stern stepfather, and the endless
-quarrels between her father and mother, which made her young life so
-unbearable, so wretched, that she could never think of those years without
-tears rising to her eyes. And then the going away, coming to live with Mr.
-Burnett! The death of her father and her dear mother, so sudden, following
-so soon one after the other. How much there had been in her life, how
-wonderful it was! Her love of Mr. Burnett, and then that bitter and
-passionate change in him! That proposal of marriage; could she ever forget
-it? And then this cruel and sudden death. Everything she had ever loved had
-been taken from her. Only Julia remained, and should Julia be taken from
-her, she felt that she must die. But that would not, could not, happen. She
-was now mistress of Ashwood, she was a great heiress; and she and Julia
-would live always together, they would always love one another, they would
-always live here in this beautiful place which they loved so well.
-
-
-
-
-VIII
-
-
-There were at the funeral a few personal friends who lived in the
-neighbourhood, the farmers on the estate, and the labourers; and when the
-little crowd separated outside the church, Emily and Julia walked back to
-Ashwood with Mr. Grandly, Mr. Burnett's intimate friend and solicitor. They
-returned through the park, hardly speaking at all, Emily absent-minded as
-usual, waving her parasol occasionally at a passing butterfly. The grass
-was warm and beautiful to look on, and they lingered, prolonging the walk.
-It was very good of Mr. Grandly to accompany them back; he might have gone
-on straight to the station, so Julia thought, and she was surprised indeed
-when, instead of bidding them good-bye at the front door, he said--
-
-'Before I return to London I have a communication to make to both you
-ladies. Will it suit you to come into the drawing-room with me?'
-
-'Perfectly, so far as I'm concerned; and you, Emily?'
-
-'Oh, I've nothing to do; but if it is about business, Julia will
-attend----'
-
-'I think you had better be present, Miss Watson.'
-
-Mr. Grandly was a tall, massive man with benevolent features; his bald,
-pink skull was partly covered with one lock of white hair. There was an
-anxious look in his pale, deep-set eyes which impressed Julia, and she
-said: 'I hope this communication you have to make to us is not of a painful
-nature. We have----'
-
-'Yes, Mrs. Bentley, I know that you have been severely tried lately, but
-there is no help for it. I cannot keep you in ignorance any longer of
-certain facts relating to Mr. Burnett's will.' The words 'will' and 'facts'
-struck on Emily's ear. She had been thinking about her fortune. The very
-ground she was walking on was hers. She was the owner of this beautiful
-park; it seemed like a fairy tale. And that house, that dear, old-fashioned
-house, that rambling, funny old place of all sizes and shapes, full of deep
-staircases and pictures, was hers. Her eyes wandered along the smooth wide
-drive, down to the placid water crossed by the great ornamental bridge, the
-island where she had watched the swans floating last night--all these
-things were hers. So the words 'will' and 'facts' and 'ignorance of them'
-jarred her clutching little dream, and she turned her eyes--they wore an
-anxious look--towards Mr. Grandly, and said with an authoritative air:
-'Yes, let us go into the drawing-room; I want to hear what Mr. Grandly has
-to say about----Let us go into the drawing-room at once.'
-
-Julia took the chair nearest to her. Emily stood at the window, waiting
-impatiently for Mr. Grandly to begin. He laid his hat on the parquet, wiped
-his forehead with his handkerchief, and drew an arm-chair forward. 'Mr.
-Burnett, as you know, made a will some years ago, in favour of his cousin
-and adopted daughter, Miss Emily Watson. In that will he left his entire
-fortune to her, Ashwood Park and all his invested money. No other person
-was mentioned in that will, except Miss Watson. It was I who drew up this
-will. I remember discussing its provisions with Mr. Burnett, and advising
-him to leave something, even if it were only a few hundred pounds, to his
-nephew, Hubert Price. But Mr. Burnett was always a very headstrong man; he
-had quarrelled with this young man, as he said, irreparably, and could not
-be induced to leave him even a hundred pounds. I thought this was harsh,
-and as Mr. Burnett's friend I told him so--I have always been opposed to
-extreme measures,--but he was not to be gainsaid. So the matter remained
-for many years; never did Mr. Burnett mention his nephew's name. I thought
-he had forgotten the young man's existence, when, suddenly, without
-warning, Mr. Burnett came into my office and told me that he intended to
-alter his will, leaving all his property to his nephew, Hubert Price. You
-know what old friends we were, and, presuming on our friendship, I told him
-what I thought of his project of disinheritance, for it amounted to that.
-Well, suffice it to say, we very nearly quarrelled over the matter. I
-refused to draw up the will, so iniquitous did it seem to me. He said:
-"Very well, Grandly, I'll go elsewhere." Then I remembered that if I
-allowed him to go elsewhere I should lose all hold over him, and I
-consented to draw up the will.'
-
-Emily listened, a vague expression of pain in her pathetic eyes. Then this
-house, this room where she was sitting, was not hers, and a strange man
-would come soon and drive her away!
-
-'And he has left Ashwood to Mr. Price, is not that his name?' she said,
-abruptly.
-
-'Yes; he has left Ashwood to Mr. Price.'
-
-'And when did he make this new will?'
-
-'I think it is just about a month ago.'
-
-Emily leaned forward, and her great eyes, full of light and sorrow, were
-fixed in space, her little pale hands linked, and the great mass of
-chestnut hair slipping from the comb. She was, in truth, at that moment the
-subject of a striking picture, and she was even more impressive when she
-said, speaking slowly: 'Then that old man was even wickeder than I thought.
-Oh, what I have learned in the last three or four weeks! Oh, what
-wickedness, what wickedness!... But go on,' she said, looking at Mr.
-Grandly; 'tell me all.'
-
-'I suppose there was some very serious reason, but on that point Mr.
-Burnett absolutely refused to answer me. He said his reasons were his own,
-and that he intended to leave his money to whom he pleased.'
-
-'There was----' Julia stopped short, and looked interrogatively at Emily.
-
-'Go on, Julia, tell him; we have nothing to conceal.'
-
-'Mr. Burnett asked Emily to marry him a short time ago; she, of course,
-refused, and ever since he seemed more like----'
-
-'A madman than anything else,' broke in Emily. 'Oh, for the last month we
-have led a miserable life! It was a happy release.'
-
-'Is it possible,' said Mr. Grandly, 'that Mr. Burnett seriously
-contemplated marriage with Miss Watson?'
-
-'Yes, and her refusal seemed to drive him out of his mind.'
-
-'I never was more surprised.' The placid face of the eminently respectable
-solicitor lapsed into contemplation. 'I often tried,' he said, suddenly,
-'to divine the reason why he changed his will. Disappointed love seemed the
-only conceivable reason, but I rejected it as being quite inconceivable.
-Well, it only shows how little we know what is passing in each other's
-minds.'
-
-'Then,' said Julia, 'Mr. Burnett has divided his fortune, leaving Ashwood
-to Mr. Price, and all his invested money to Emily?'
-
-A look of pain passed over Mr. Grandly's benevolent face, and he answered:
-'Unfortunately he has left everything to Mr. Price.'
-
-'I'm glad,' exclaimed Emily, 'that he has left me nothing. Once he thought
-fit to disinherit me because I would not marry him, I prefer not to have
-anything to do with his money.'
-
-Mr. Grandly and Julia looked at each other; they did not need to speak;
-each knew that the girl did not realise at once the full and irretrievable
-nature of this misfortune. The word 'destitute' was at present unrealised,
-and she only thought that she had been deprived of what she loved best in
-the world--Ashwood. Mr. Grandly glanced at her, and then speaking a little
-more hurriedly, said--
-
-'I was saying just now that I only consented to draw up the will so that I
-might be able at some future time to induce Mr. Burnett to add a codicil to
-it. Later on I spoke to him again on the subject, and he promised to
-consider it, and a few days after he wrote to me, saying that he had
-decided to take my advice and add a codicil. Subsequently, in another
-letter he mentioned three hundred a year as being the sum he thought he
-would be in honour bound to leave Miss Watson. Unfortunately, he did not
-live long enough to carry this intention into execution. But the letters he
-addressed to me on the subject exist, and I have every hope that the heir,
-Mr. Price, will be glad to make some provision for his cousin.'
-
-'Have you any reason for thinking that Mr. Price will do so?' said Julia.
-
-'No. But it seems impossible for any honourable man to act otherwise.'
-
-'He cannot bear enmity against Emily, who of course knew nothing of his
-quarrel with his uncle. Do you know anything about Mr. Price? What is he?
-Where does he live?'
-
-'He is a literary man, I believe. I have heard that he writes plays!'
-
-'Oh, a writer of plays.'
-
-'Yes. I am glad of it; he may be easier to deal with. I daresay it is a
-mistaken notion, but one is apt to imagine that these artist folk are more
-generous with their money than ordinary mortals.'
-
-'Is he married?' said Julia, and involuntarily she glanced toward Emily.
-
-Mr. Grandly, too, looked toward the girl, and then he said: 'I don't know
-if Mr. Price is married; I hope not.'
-
-'Why do you hope so?' said Emily, suddenly.
-
-'Because if he isn't, there will only be one person to deal with. If he had
-a wife, she would have a voice in the matter; and in such circumstances as
-ours a man is easier to deal with. I earnestly hope Mr. Hubert Price is not
-married, and shall consider it a great point in our favour if on returning
-to town I find he is not.' Then assuming a lighter tone, for the nervous
-strain of the last ten minutes had been intense, he said: 'If he is not
-married, who knows--you may take a fancy to him, and he to you; then things
-would be just the same as before--only better.'
-
-'I should not marry him--I hate him already. I wonder how you can think of
-such a thing, Mr. Grandly? You know that he must be a very wicked man for
-uncle to have disinherited him. I have always heard that--but I don't know
-what I am saying.' Tears welled up into her eyes. 'I daresay my cousin is
-not so bad as--but I can talk no more.... I am very miserable, I have
-always been miserable, and I don't know why; I never did harm to any one.'
-
-Soon after Mr. Grandly bade the ladies good-bye. Julia followed him to the
-front door. 'You will do all you can to help us? That poor child is too
-young, too inexperienced, to realise what her position is.'
-
-'I know, I know,' said Mr. Grandly, extending both hands to Julia; 'in the
-whole course of my experience I never met with a sadder case. But we must
-not take too sad a view of it. Perhaps all will come right in the end. The
-young man cannot refuse to make good his uncle's intentions. He cannot see
-his cousin go to the workhouse. I will do the best I can for you. The
-moment I get back to London, I'll set inquiries on foot and find out his
-address, and when I have seen him I'll write. Good-bye.'
-
-Then, resolving that it were better to leave the girl to herself, Julia
-took up her key-basket and hurried away on household business. But in the
-middle of her many occupations she would now and then stop short to think.
-She had never heard of anything so cruel before. That poor girl--she must
-go to her; she must not leave her alone any longer. But it would be well to
-avoid the subject as much as possible. She must think of something to
-distract her thoughts. The pony-chaise. It might be the last time they had
-a carriage to go out in. But they could not go out driving on the day of
-the funeral.
-
-That evening, as they were going to bed, Emily said, lifting her sweet,
-pathetic little face, looking all love and gentleness: 'Oh, to think of a
-common, vulgar writer coming here, with a common, vulgar wife and a horrid
-crowd of children. Oh, Julia, doesn't it seem impossible? And yet I suppose
-it is true. I cannot bear to think of it. I can see the horrid children
-tramping up and down the stairs, breaking the things we have known and
-loved so long; and they will destroy all my flowers, and no one will
-remember to feed the poor swans. Dandy, my beloved, I shall be able to take
-you with me.' And she caught up the rough-haired terrier and hugged him,
-kissing his dear old head. 'Dandy is mine; they can't take him from me, can
-they? But do you think the swans belong to them or to us? I suppose it
-would be impossible to take them with us if we go to live in London. They
-couldn't live in a backyard.'
-
-'But, dearest Emily, who are "they"? You don't know that he is
-married--literary men don't often marry. For all you know, he is a handsome
-young man, who will fall madly in love with you.'
-
-'No one ever fell in love with me except that horrid old man--how I hate
-him, how I detest to think of it! I thought I should have died when he
-asked to marry me. The very memory of it is enough to make me hate all men,
-and prevent me from liking any one. I don't think I could like him; I
-should always see that wicked old man's hoary, wrinkled face in his.'
-
-'Oh, Emily, I cannot think how such ideas can come into your head. It is
-not right, indeed it isn't.' And this simple Englishwoman looked at this
-sensitive girl in sheer wonderment and alarm.
-
-'I only say what I think. I am glad the old man did disinherit me. I'm glad
-we are leaving Ashwood; I cannot abide the place when I think of him....
-There, that is his chair. I can see him sitting in it now. He is grinning
-at us; he is saying, "Ha! ha! I have made beggars of you both." You
-remember how we used to tremble when we met his terrible old face on the
-stairs; you remember how he used to sit glaring at us all through dinner?'
-
-'Yes, Emily, I remember all that; but I do not think it natural that you
-should forget all the years of kindness; he was very good to you, and loved
-you very much, and if he forgot himself at the end of his life, we must
-remember the weakness of age.'
-
-'The hideousness of age,' Emily replied, in a low tone. The conversation
-paused, and then Julia said--
-
-'You are speaking wildly, Emily, and will live to regret your words. Let us
-speak no more of Mr. Burnett... I daresay you will find your cousin a
-charming young man. I should laugh if it were all to end in a marriage. And
-how glad I should be to see you off on your honeymoon, to bid you
-good-bye!'
-
-'Oh, Julia, don't speak like that; you will never bid me good-bye. You will
-never leave me--promise me that--you are my only friend. Oh, Julia, promise
-me that you will never leave me.'
-
-Tears rose in Julia's eyes, and taking the girl in her arms, she said,
-'I'll never leave you, my dear girl, until you yourself wish it.'
-
-'I wish it? Oh, Julia, you do not know me. I have lost everything, Julia,
-but I mustn't lose you... After all, it doesn't so much matter, so long as
-we are not separated. I don't care about money, and we can have a nice
-little house in London all to ourselves. And if we get too hard up, we'll
-both go out as daily governesses. I think I could teach a little music, to
-young children, you know; you'd teach the older ones.' Emily looked at
-Julia inquiringly, and going over to the piano, attempted to play her
-favourite polka. Julia, who had once worked for her daily bread, and earned
-it in a sort of way by giving music-lessons, smiled sadly at the girl's
-ignorance of life.
-
-'I see,' said Emily, who was quick to divine every shade of sentiment
-passing in the minds of those she loved; 'you don't think I could teach
-even the little children.'
-
-'My dear Emily, I hope it will never come to your having to try.'
-
-'I must do something to get a living,' she replied, looking vaguely and
-wistfully into the fire. 'How unfortunate all this is--that horrid, horrid
-old man. But supposing he had asked you to marry him--he wasn't nice, but
-you are older than I, and if you had married him you would have become, in
-a way, my stepmother. But what a charming stepmother! Oh, how I should have
-loved that!'
-
-'Come, Emily, it is time to go to bed; you let your imagination run away
-with you.'
-
-'Julia, you are not cross because----'
-
-'No, dear, I'm not cross. I'm only a little tired. We have talked too
-long.'
-
-Emily's allusion to music-teaching had revived in Julia all her most
-painful memories. If this man were to cast them penniless out of Ashwood!
-Supposing, supposing that were to happen? Starving days, pale and haggard,
-rose up in her memory. What should she do, what should she do, and with
-that motherless girl dependent on her for food and clothes and shelter? She
-buried her face in the pillow and prayed that she might be saved from such
-a destiny.
-
-If this man--this unknown creature--were to refuse to help them, she and
-Emily would have to go to London, and she would have to support Emily as
-best she might. She would hold to her and fight for her with all her
-strength, but would she not fall vanquished in the fight; and then, and
-then? The same thoughts, questions, and fears turned in her head like a
-wheel, and it was not until dawn had begun to whiten the window-panes that
-she fell asleep.
-
-A few days after, the post brought a letter for Julia. After glancing
-hastily down the page she said: 'This is a letter from Mr. Grandly, and it
-is good news. Oh, what a relief!...'
-
-'Read it.'
-
-'"Dear Mrs. Bentley,--Immediately I arrived in London, I set to work to
-find out Mr. Price's address. It was the easiest matter in the world, for
-he has a play now running at one of the theatres. So I directed my letter
-to the theatre, and next morning I had a visit from him. After explaining
-to him the resources of the brilliant fortune he had come into, I told him
-of his uncle's intention to add a codicil to his will, leaving Miss Watson
-three hundred a year; I told him that this last will had left her entirely
-unprovided for. He said, at once, that he fully agreed with me, and that he
-would consider what was the most honourable course for him to take in
-regard to his 'cousin. This is exactly what he said, but his manner was
-such that before leaving he left no doubt in my mind whatever that he will
-act very generously indeed. I should not be surprised if he settled even
-more than the proposed three hundred a year on Miss Watson. He is a very
-quiet, thoughtful young man of about two or three and thirty. He looks
-poor, and I fancy he has lived through very hard times. He wears an air of
-sadness and disappointment which makes him attractive, and his manners are
-gentle and refined. I tell you these things, for I know they will interest
-you. I have not been able to find out if he is married, but I am sorry to
-say that his play has not succeeded. I should have found out more, but he
-was not in my office above ten minutes; he had to hurry away to keep an
-appointment at the theatre, for, as he explained, it was to be decided that
-very day if the play was to be taken out of the bills at the end of the
-week. He promised to call again, and our interview is fixed for eleven
-o'clock the day after to-morrow. In the meantime take heart, for I think I
-am justified in telling you I feel quite sanguine as to the result."'
-
-'Well,' said Julia, laying down the letter, 'I don't think that anything
-could be more satisfactory, and just fancy dear old Mr. Grandly being able
-to describe a young man as well as that.'
-
-'He doesn't say if he is short or tall, or dark or fair.'
-
-'No, he doesn't. I think he might have told us something about his personal
-appearance, but it is a great relief to hear that he is not the vulgar
-Bohemian we have always understood him to be. Mr. Grandly says his manners
-are refined; you might take a fancy to him after all.'
-
-'But you don't know that he isn't married. I suppose Mr. Grandly wasn't
-able to find that out. I should like to know--but not because I want to
-marry him or any one else; only I don't like the idea of a great, vulgar
-woman, and a pack of children scampering about the place when we go.'
-
-'Do you dislike children so much, then, Emily?'
-
-'I don't know that I ever thought about them; but I'm sure I shouldn't like
-his children. I dreamt of him last night. Do you believe in dreams?'
-
-'What did you dream?'
-
-'I cannot remember, but I woke up crying, feeling more unhappy than I ever
-felt in my life before. It is curious that I should dream of him last
-night, and that you should receive that letter this morning, isn't it?'
-
-'I don't see anything strange in it. Nothing more natural than that you
-should dream about him, and it was certain that I should receive a letter
-from Mr. Grandly; he promised to write to me in a few days.'
-
-'Then you believe what is in that letter--I don't. Something tells me that
-he will not act kindly, but I don't know how.'
-
-'I'm quite sure you are wrong, Emily. Mr. Grandly would never have written
-this letter unless he knew for certain that Mr. Price would do all or more
-than he promised.'
-
-'I can't see from the letter that he has promised anything... Even if he
-does give me three hundred a year, I shall have to leave Ashwood.'
-
-'My dear Emily, I'm cross with you: of course, if you will insist on always
-looking at the melancholy side.... Now I'm going; I've to see after the
-housekeeping. Are you going into the garden?'
-
-'Yes, presently.'
-
-Emily did not seem to know what she was going to do. She looked out of the
-window, she lingered in the corridor; finally she wandered into the
-library. The quaint, old-fashioned room recalled her childhood to her. It
-was here she used to learn her lessons. Here was the mahogany table, at
-which she used to sit with her governess, learning to read and write; and
-there, far away at the other end of the long room, was the round table,
-where lay the old illustrated editions of _Gulliver's Travels_ and _The
-Arabian Nights_, which she used to run to whenever her governess left the
-room. And at the bottom of the book-cases there were drawers full of
-strange papers; these drawers she used to open in fear and trembling, so
-mysterious did they seem to her. And there was the book-cases full of the
-tall folios, behind which lay, in dark and dim recesses, stores of books
-which she used to pull out, expecting at every moment to come upon
-long-forgotten treasures. She smiled now, as she recalled these childish
-imaginings, and lifting tenderly the coarse drugget, she looked at the
-great green globe which her fingers used to turn in infantile curiosity.
-
-Then leaving the library, she roamed through the house, pausing on the
-first landing to gaze on the picture of the fine gentleman in a red coat,
-his hand for ever on his sword. She remembered how she used to wonder whom
-he was going to kill, and how sure she used to feel that at last he would
-grant his adversary his life. And close by was the picture of the
-wind-mill, set on the edge of the down, with the shepherd driving sheep in
-the foreground. Her whole life seemed drenched with tears at the thought of
-parting with these things. Every room was full of memories for her. She was
-a little girl when she came to live at Ashwood, and the room at the top of
-the stairs had been her nursery. There were the two beds; both were now
-dismantled and bare. It was in the little bed in the corner that she used
-to sleep; it was in the old four-poster that her nurse slept. And there was
-the very place, in front of the fire, where she used to have her tea. The
-table had disappeared, and the grate, how rusty it was! In the far corner,
-by the window, there used to be a press, in which nurse kept tea and sugar.
-That press had been removed. The other press was there still, and throwing
-open the doors she surveyed the shelves. She remembered the very peg on
-which her hat and jacket used to hang. And the long walks in the great
-park, which was to her, then, a world of wonderment!
-
-She wandered about the old corridor, in and out of odd rooms, all
-associated with her childhood--quaint old rooms, many of them lumber rooms,
-full of odd corners and old cupboards, the meaning of which she used to
-strive to divine. How their silence and mystery used to thrill her little
-soul! Faded rooms whose mystery had departed, but whose gloom was haunted
-with tenderest recollections. In one corner was the reading-chair in which
-Mr. Burnett used to sit. At that time she used to sit on his knee, and when
-the chair gave way beneath their weight, he had said she was too big a girl
-to sit on his knee any longer. The words had seemed to her a little cruel.
-She had forgotten the old chair, but now she remembered the very moment
-when the servants came to take it away.
-
-Under the window were some fragments of a china bowl which she had broken
-when quite a little child. There was a hoop-stick and the hoop which had
-been taken down to the blacksmith's to be mended. He had mended it, but she
-did not remember ever using it again. And there was an old box of
-water-colours, with which she used to colour all the uncoloured drawings in
-her picture-books. Emily took the hoop-stick, the old doll, and the broken
-box of water-colours, and packed them away carefully. She would be able to
-find room for them in the little house in London where she and Julia were
-going to live.
-
-A few days after, the post brought letters from Mr. Grandly, one for Emily
-and one for Julia. Julia's letter ran as follows:
-
-'Dear Mrs. Bentley,---I write by this post to Miss Watson, advising her
-that her cousin, Mr. Price, is most anxious to make her acquaintance, and
-asking her to send the dog-cart to-morrow to meet him at the station. I
-must take upon myself the responsibility for this step. I have seen Mr.
-Price again, and he has confirmed me in my good opinion of him. He seems
-most anxious, not only to do everything right, but to make matters as
-pleasant and agreeable as possible for his cousin. He has written me a
-letter recognising Miss Watson's claim upon him, and constituting himself
-her trustee. I have not had yet time to prepare a deed of gift, but there
-can be little doubt that Miss Watson's position is now quite secure. So far
-so good; but more than ever does the only clear and satisfactory way out of
-this miserable business seem to me to be a marriage between Mr. Hubert
-Price and Miss Watson. I have already told you that he is a nice, refined
-young man, of gentlemanly bearing, good presence, and excellent speech,
-though a trifle shy and reserved; and, as I have since discovered that he
-is not married, I have taken upon myself the responsibility of advising him
-to jump into a train and to go and tell his cousin the conclusion he has
-come to regarding the will of the late Mr. Burnett. As I have said, he is a
-shy man, and it was some time before I could induce him to take so decisive
-a step; he wanted to meet Miss Watson in my office, but I succeeded in
-persuading him. He will go down to you to-morrow by the five o'clock, and I
-need not impress upon you the necessity that you should use your influence
-with Miss Watson, and that his reception should be as cordial as
-circumstances permit. I have only to add that I see no need that you should
-show this letter to Miss Watson, for the very fact of knowing that we
-desired to bring about a marriage might prejudice her against this young
-man, whom she otherwise cannot fail to find charming.'
-
-Hearing some one at her door, Julia put the letter away. It was Emily.
-
-'I've just received a letter from Mr. Grandly, saying that that man is
-coming here to-day, and that we are to send the dog-cart for him.'
-
-'Is not that the very best thing that----'
-
-'We cannot remain here, we must leave a note for him, or something of that
-kind. I wouldn't remain here to meet him for worlds. I really couldn't,
-Julia.'
-
-'And why not, Emily?'
-
-'To meet the man who is coming to turn me out of Ashwood!'
-
-'How do you know that he is coming to turn you out of Ashwood? You imagine
-these things.... Do you suppose that Mr. Grandly would send him down here
-if he did not know what his intentions were?'
-
-'But we shall have to leave Ashwood.'
-
-'Very likely, but not in the way you imagine. Remember, Mr. Price is your
-cousin; you may like him very much. Let's be guided by Mr. Grandly; I have
-not seen your letter, but apparently he advises us to remain here and
-receive him.'
-
-'I don't think I can, Julia. I have misgivings.'
-
-'Have you been dreaming again?'
-
-'No; I've not been dreaming, but I have misgivings.'
-
-'You are a silly little goose, Emily. Come and give me a kiss, and promise
-to take my advice.'
-
-'Dearest Julia, you do love me, don't you? Promise me that we shall not be
-separated, and then I don't mind.'
-
-'Yes, dear, I promise you that, and you will promise me to try to like your
-cousin?'
-
-'I'll try, Julia, but I'm awfully frightened, and--I don't think I could
-like him, no matter what he was like. I feel a sort of hatred in my heart.
-Don't you know what I mean?' And the girl looked questioningly into her
-friend's eyes.
-
-
-
-
-IX
-
-
-'I am Miss Watson,' she said in her low musical voice, 'and this is my
-friend, Mrs. Bentley.' Hubert bowed, and sought for words. He found none,
-and the irritating silence was broken again by Miss Watson. 'Won't you sit
-down?' she said.
-
-'Thank you.' He pulled off his gloves. The pained, troubled look which he
-had met in Miss Watson's face seemed a reproach, and he regretted not
-having followed his own idea, and invited the young lady to meet him at Mr.
-Grandly's office. He glanced nervously from one lady to the other.
-
-'I hope you have had a pleasant journey, Mr. Price,' said Mrs. Bentley.
-'The country is looking very beautiful just at present. Do you know this
-part of the country?' Mrs. Bentley's words were very welcome, and Hubert
-replied eagerly--
-
-'No; I do not know the country at all well. I have been very little out of
-London for some years, but I hope now to see more of the country. This is a
-beautiful place.'
-
-At that moment he met Mrs. Bentley's eyes, and, feeling that he was
-touching on delicate ground, he stopped speaking. When he turned his head,
-he met Miss Watson's great sad eyes, which seemed to absorb the entire
-face, fixed upon him. They expressed such depth of pathetic appeal that he
-trembled with apprehension, and the instinct in him was to beg for pardon.
-But it became suddenly necessary to say something, and, speaking at random,
-his head full of whirling words, he said--
-
-'Of course nothing could be more sad than my poor uncle's death,--so
-unexpected... Having lived so long together, you must have----' Then it was
-Hubert's turn to look appealingly at Miss Watson; but her great eyes seemed
-to say, 'Go on, go on; heap cruelty on cruelty!' Then he plunged
-desperately, hoping to retrieve his mistakes. 'He died about a month ago.
-Mr. Grandly told me I should still find you here, so I thought----'
-
-The intensity of his emotion perhaps caused Hubert to accentuate his words,
-so that they conveyed a meaning different from that which he intended.
-Certainly his hesitations were capable of misinterpretation, and Miss
-Watson said, her voice trembling,--
-
-'Of course we know we have no right here, we are intruding; but we are
-making preparations.... I daresay that to-morrow we shall be able to----'
-
-'Oh, I beg pardon, Miss Watson; let me assure you ... I am sorry if----'
-
-Taking a little handkerchief out of her black dress, Emily covered her face
-in her thin, tiny hands. She sobbed aloud, and ran out of the room. Hubert
-turned to Mrs. Bentley, his face full of consternation.
-
-'I am very sorry, but she did not give me time to speak. Will you go and
-fetch her, Mrs. Bentley? I want to tell her I hope she will never leave
-Ashwood. ... I believe she thinks that I came down here to ask her to leave
-as soon as possible. It is really quite awful that she should think such a
-thing.'
-
-'She is an exceedingly sensitive girl, and is now a little overwrought. The
-events of the last month have proved too much for her.'
-
-'Mr. Grandly informed me that it was Mr. Burnett's intention to add a
-codicil to his will, leaving Miss Watson three hundred a year. This money I
-am prepared to give her, and I'm quite sure she is welcome to stay here as
-long as she pleases. Indeed, she will do me a great favour by remaining.
-Please go and tell her. I cannot bear to see a girl cry; to hear her sob
-like that is quite terrible.'
-
-'You will be able to tell her yourself during the course of the evening. I
-think it will come better from you.'
-
-'After what has happened, it will be very difficult for me to meet her
-until she is informed that she is mistaken. I charged Mr. Grandly to
-explain everything in his letter. Apparently he omitted to do so.'
-
-'He only said you wanted to see Emily on a matter of business. Of course we
-did not expect such generosity.'
-
-They were standing quite close together, and suddenly Hubert became
-conscious of Mrs. Bentley's beauty. Her blue eyes were at that moment full
-of tender admiration for the instinctive generosity which Hubert so
-unwittingly exhibited, and her eyes told what was passing in her soul.
-Suddenly they both seemed to understand each other better, and, playing
-with the bracelet on her arm, she said--
-
-'You do not know Emily; she is strangely sensitive. But I will go and try
-to persuade her to return.... Although only distantly related, you are
-cousins, after all--are you not?'
-
-'Yes, we are cousins, but the relationship is remote. Tell her everything;
-beg of her to come down-stairs.'
-
-Hubert imagined Emily's little black figure thrown upon her bed, sobbing
-convulsively. He was very much agitated, and looked about the room, at
-first hardly seeing it. At last its novelty drew his thoughts from his
-cousin's tears, and he wondered what was the history of the house. 'The old
-man,' he thought, 'bought it all, furniture and ancestors, from some ruined
-landowner, and attempted very few alterations--that's clear.' Then he
-reproached himself. 'How could I have been so stupid? I did not know what I
-was saying. I was so horribly nervous. Those strange eyes of hers quite
-upset me. I do hope Mrs. Bentley will tell her that I wish to act
-generously, that I am prepared to do everything in my power to make her
-happy. Poor little thing! She looks as if she had never been happy.' Again
-the room drew Hubert's thoughts away from his cousin. It was still lit with
-the faint perfumed glow of the sunset. The paint of the old decorations was
-cracked and faded. A man in a plum-coloured coat with gold facings fixed
-his eyes upon him, and the tall lady in blue satin had no doubt played
-there in short clothes. He walked up and down, he turned over the music on
-the piano, and, hearing a step, looked round. It was only the servant
-coming to tell him that his room was ready.
-
-He dressed for dinner, hoping to find the two ladies in the drawing-room,
-and it was a disappointment to find only Mrs. Bentley there.
-
-'I have told Emily everything you said. She is very grateful, and begs of
-me to thank you for your kind intentions. But I am afraid you must excuse
-her absence from dinner. I really don't think she is in a fit state to come
-down; she couldn't possibly take part in the conversation.'
-
-'But why? I hope she isn't ill? Had we better send for the doctor?'
-
-'Oh no; she'll be all right in the morning. She has been crying. She
-suffers from depression of spirits. She is, I assure you, all right,' said
-Mrs. Bentley, replying to Hubert's alarmed and questioning face. 'I assure
-you there is no need for you to reproach yourself. Dinner is ready.' She
-took his arm, and they went into the dining-room.
-
-No further mention was made of Mr. Burnett, of money matters, or of the
-young lady up-stairs; and with considerable tact Mrs. Bentley introduced
-the subject of literature, alluding gracefully to Hubert's position as a
-dramatist.
-
-'Your play, _Divorce_, is now running at the Queen's Theatre?'
-
-No; I'm sorry to say it was taken out of the bills last Saturday. Saturday
-night was the last performance.'
-
-'That was not a long run. And the papers spoke so favourably of it.'
-
-'It is a play that only appeals to the few.' And, encouraged by Mrs.
-Bentley's manner, Hubert told her how happy endings and comic love-scenes
-were essential to secure a popular success.
-
-'I am afraid you will think me very stupid, but I do not quite understand.'
-
-In a quiet, unobtrusive way Hubert was a graceful talker, and he knew how
-to adapt his theme, and bring it within the circle of the sympathies of his
-listeners. There was some similarity of temperament between himself and
-Mrs. Bentley; they were both quiet, fair, meditative Saxons. She lent her
-whole mind to the conversation, interested in the account that the young
-man gave of his dramatic aspirations.
-
-From the dining-room window looking over the park the long road wound
-through the vaporous country. The town stood in the middle distance, its
-colour blotted out, and its smoke hardly distinguishable. In the room a
-yellow dress turned grey, and the gold of a bracelet grew darker, and the
-pink of delicate finger-nails was no longer visible. But the pensive dusk
-of the dining-room, which blackened the claret in the decanters, leaving
-only the faintest ruby glow in the glass which Hubert raised to his lips,
-suited the tenor of the conversation, which had wandered from the dramatic
-to the social side of the question. What did he think of divorce? She
-sighed, and he wondered what her story might be.
-
-They passed out of the dining-room, and stood on the gravel, watching the
-night gathering in the open country. In the light of the moon, which had
-just risen above the woods, the white road grew whiter, the town was
-faintly seen in the tide of blue vapour, which here and there allowed a
-field to appear. In the foreground a great silver fir, spiky and solitary,
-rose up in the blue night. Beyond it was seen a corner of the ornamental
-bridge. The island and its shadow were one black mass rising from the park
-up to the level of the moon, which, a little to the right, between the town
-and the island, lay reflected in a narrow strip of water. Farther away some
-reeds were visible in the illusive light, and the meditative chatter of
-dozing ducks stirred the silence which wrapped the country like a cloak.
-
-Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood looking at the landscape. The fragrance of
-his cigar, the presence of the woman, the tenderness of the hour, combined
-to make him strangely happy; his past life seemed to him like a harsh,
-cruel pain that had suddenly ceased. More than he had ever desired seemed
-to be fulfilled; the reality exceeded the dream. What greater happiness
-than to live here, and with this woman! His thoughts paused, for he had
-forgotten the girl up-stairs. She was not happy; but he would make her
-happy--of that he was quite certain. At that moment Mrs. Bentley said--
-
-'I hope you like your home. Is not the prospect a lovely one?'
-
-'Yes; but I was thinking at that moment of Emily. I suppose I must accustom
-myself to call her by her Christian name. She is my cousin, and we are
-going to live together. But, by the way, she cannot stay here alone. I
-hope--I may trust that you will remain with her?'
-
-Mrs. Bentley turned her face towards him; he noticed the look of pleasure
-that had passed into it.
-
-'Thank you; it is very good of you. I shall be glad to remain with Emily as
-long as she cares for my society. It is needless to say I shall do my best
-to deserve your approval.'
-
-[Illustration: "They dined at the Café Royal."]
-
-Her voice fell, and he heard her sigh, and in his happiness it seemed to
-him to be a pity that he should find unhappiness in others.
-
-They went into the drawing-room. Mrs. Bentley asked him if he liked music,
-and she went to the piano and sang some Scotch songs very sweetly. Then she
-took a book from the table and bade him good-night. She was sure that he
-would excuse her. She must go and see after Emily.
-
-When the door closed, the woman who had just left him seemed like some one
-he had seen in a dream; and still more shadowy and illusive did the girl
-seem--that pale and plaintive beauty, looking like a pastel, who had so
-troubled him with her enigmatic eyes! And the lodging-house that he had
-left only a few hours ago! and Rose.
-
-On Sunday he had taken Rose out to dinner. They dined at the Café-Royal. He
-had tried to talk to her about Hamilton Brown's new drama, which they had
-just heard would follow _Divorce_; but he was unable to detach his thoughts
-from Ashwood and the ladies he was going to visit to-morrow evening. Hubert
-and Rose had felt like two school-fellows, one of whom is leaving school;
-the link that had bound them had snapped; henceforth their ways lay
-separate; and they were sad at parting just as school-friends are sad.
-
-'You are not rich; you offered to lend me money once. I want to lend you
-some now.'
-
-'Oh yes; five shillings, wasn't it?'
-
-'It doesn't matter what the sum was--we were both very poor then----'
-
-'And I'm still poorer now.'
-
-'All the more reason why you should allow me to help you.... Allow me to
-write you a cheque for a hundred pounds. I assure you I can afford it.'
-
-'I think I had better not.... I have some things I can sell.'
-
-'But you must not sell your things. Indeed, you must allow me----'
-
-'I think I'd rather not. I shall be all right--that is to say, if Ford
-engages me for Brown's new piece; and I think he will.'
-
-'But if he doesn't?'
-
-'Then,' she said, with a sweet and natural smile, 'I'll write to you.... We
-have been excellent friends--comrades--have we not?'
-
-'Yes, we have indeed, and I shall never forget. There is my address; that
-will always find me.'
-
-He had written a play--a play that the most competent critics had
-considered a work of genius; in any case, a play that had interested his
-generation more than any other. It had failed, and failed twice; but did
-that prove anything? Fortune had deserted him, and he had been unable to
-finish _The Gipsy_. Was it the fault of circumstances that he had not been
-able to finish that play? or was it that the slight vein of genius that had
-been in him once had been exhausted? He remembered the article in _The
-Modern Review_, and was frightened to think that the critic might have
-divined the truth. Once it had seemed impossible to finish that play; but
-fortune had come to his aid, accident had made him master of his destiny;
-he could spend three years, five years if he liked, on _The Gipsy_. But why
-think of the play at all? What did it matter even if he never wrote it?
-There were many things to do in life besides writing plays. There was life!
-His life was henceforth his own, and he could live it as he pleased. What
-should he do with it? To whom should he give it? Should he keep it all for
-himself and his art? It were useless to make plans. All he knew for certain
-was that henceforth he was master of his own life, and could dispense it as
-he pleased.
-
-And then, in sensuous curiosity, his thoughts turned on the pleasure of
-life in this beautiful house, in the society of two charming women.
-
-'Perhaps I shall marry one of them. Which do I like the better? I haven't
-the least idea.' And then, as his thoughts detached themselves, he
-remembered Emily's tears.
-
-
-
-
-X
-
-
-It was a day of English summer, and the meadows and trees drowsed in the
-moist atmosphere; a few white clouds hung lazily in the blue sky; the
-garden was bright with geraniums and early roses, and the closely cropped
-privets were in full leaf. Hubert's senses were taken with the beauty of
-the morning, and there came the thought, so delicious, 'All this is mine.'
-He noticed the glitter of the greenhouses, and thought the cawing of some
-young rooks a sweet sound; a great tortoiseshell cat lay basking in the
-middle of the greensward, whisking its furry tail. Hubert stroked the
-animal; it arched its back, and rubbed itself against his legs. At that
-moment a half-bred fox-terrier barked noisily at him; he heard some one
-calling the dog, and saw a slight black figure hastening down one of the
-side-walks. Despite the dog's attempts on his legs, he ran forward.
-
-'Emily! Emily!' he called. She stopped, turned, and stood looking at him.
-
-'My dear cousin,' he said. 'I'm sorry about last night. I hope that Mrs.
-Bentley has told you. I begged of her to do so.'
-
-'Yes; she told me of your kind intentions. I have to thank you.'
-
-They walked on in silence, neither knowing what to say.
-
-'Go away, Dandy!' said Emily, thrusting her black silk parasol at the dog,
-who had begun an attack on Hubert's trousers. The dog retreated; Hubert
-laughed.
-
-'I'm afraid he doesn't like me.'
-
-'He'll soon get to know you. Are you fond of animals?'
-
-'I don't know that I am, particularly.'
-
-'Oh!' she said, looking at him reproachfully, 'how can you?' Her eyes
-seemed to say, 'I never can like you after that.' 'I adore animals,' she
-said. 'My dear dog--there is nothing in the world I love as I love my
-Dandy; come here, dear.' The dog came, wagging his tail, putting back his
-ears, knowing he was going to be caressed. Emily stooped down, took his
-rough head in her hands, and kissed him. 'Is he not a dear?' she said,
-looking up; and then she said, 'I hope you won't object to having him in
-the house;' her face clouded.
-
-'Oh, my dear Emily, how can you ask such a question? I shall never object
-to anything you desire.' The conversation paused, and they walked some
-paces in silence. Emily had just begun to speak of her flowers, when they
-came upon the gardener, who was standing in consternation over the
-fragments of a broken mowing-machine. Jack--that was the donkey--had been
-left to himself just for a moment. It was impossible to say what wild freak
-had taken him; but instead of waiting, as he was expected to wait,
-stolidly, he had started off on a wild career, regardless of the safety of
-the machine. At the first bound it had come in contact with a flower-vase,
-which had been sent in many pieces over the sward; at the second it had met
-with some stone coping; and at the third it had turned over in complete
-dissolution, and Jack was free to tear up the turf with his hoofs, until
-finally his erratic course was stopped by the small boy who was responsible
-for the animal's behaviour. The arrival of Hubert and Emily saved the small
-boy from many a cuff and the donkey from a kick or two; and Jack stood amid
-the ruin he had created, as quiet and as docile a creature as the mind
-could imagine.
-
-'Oh, you--you wicked Jack! Who would have thought it of you?' said Emily,
-throwing her arms round the animal's neck. 'And at your age, too! This is
-my old donkey,' she said, turning her dreamy eyes on Hubert. 'I used to
-ride him every day until about two years ago. I love my dear old Jack, and
-would not have him beaten for worlds, although he is so wicked as to break
-the mowing-machine. Look what you have done to the flower-vase.' The animal
-shook its long ears.
-
-Hubert and Emily strolled down a long walk, wondering what they should talk
-about.
-
-'These are really very pretty grounds,' he said at last. 'I am sure I shall
-enjoy myself immensely here.' The remark appeared to him to be of doubtful
-taste, and he hastened to add, 'That is to say, if I have completely made
-it up with my pretty cousin.'
-
-'But you have not seen the place yet,' she said, speaking still with a
-certain tremor in her voice. 'You haven't even seen the gardens. Come, and
-I'll show them to you.'
-
-Hubert would have preferred to walk with her through these ornamental
-swards; and he liked the espalier apple-trees with which the garden was
-divided better than the glare and heat of the greenhouses into which she
-took him.
-
-'Do you care for flowers?'
-
-'Not very much.'
-
-'These are all my flowers,' she said, pointing to many rows of flower-pots.
-'Those are Julia's. You see I run a line of thread around mine, so that
-there shall be no mistake. She is not nearly so careful as I am, and it
-isn't nice to find that the plants you have been tending for weeks have
-been spoilt by over-watering. I don't say she doesn't love them, but she
-forgets them.... Just look at those; they are devoured by insects. They
-want to be taken out and given a thorough cleansing. Even then I doubt if
-they would come out right,--a plant never forgives you; it is just like a
-human being.'
-
-'And doesn't a human being ever forgive?'
-
-'Oh, I didn't mean that!' she said, blushing; 'but sometimes I could cry
-over the poor plants which she neglects. I daresay you will think me very
-ridiculous, but I do cry sometimes, and sometimes I cannot resist taking
-them out on the sly, and giving them a thoroughly good syringing,--only you
-must not tell her; we have agreed not to touch each other's flowers. But I
-cannot bear to see the poor things dying. How do we know that they do not
-suffer?'
-
-'I don't think it probable.'
-
-'But we don't know for certain,' she said, fixing her great eyes on him.
-'Do we?'
-
-'We know nothing for certain,' he answered; and then he said, 'You and Mrs.
-Bentley have lived a long time together?'
-
-'No; not very long. About a couple of years. I was about thirteen when I
-came to Ashwood. I am now eighteen. Mrs. Bentley is a sort of connection.
-She is very poor--that is why Mr. Burnett asked her to come and live here;
-besides, as I grew up I wanted a companion. She has been very good to me.
-We have been very happy together--at least, as happy as one may be; for I
-don't think that any one is ever very happy. Have you been very happy?'
-
-'I have not always been happy. But tell me more about Mrs. Bentley.'
-
-'There is little more to tell. I naturally love her very much. She nursed
-me when I was ill--and I'm often ill; she taught me all I know; she cheered
-me when I was sad--when I thought my heart would break; when everybody else
-seemed unkind she was kind. Besides, I could not remain here without her.'
-Emily lowered her eyes, and the conversation seemed to pause.
-
-'I have arranged all that,' Hubert answered hurriedly. 'I spoke to her last
-night, and she has consented to remain.'
-
-'That is very good of you.' Emily raised her eyes and looked shyly at
-Hubert; and then, as if doubtful of herself, she said, 'Do you like her?
-I'm sure you do. Every one does. Do you not think she is very handsome?'
-
-'I think her an exceedingly pleasant woman, and I'm sure we shall all get
-on very well together.'
-
-'But don't you think her very handsome?'
-
-'Yes; she is a handsome woman.'
-
-Nothing more was said. Emily drew meditatively on the gravel with the point
-of her parasol. The gardeners looked up from their work.
-
-'I have to go now,' she said, raising her eyes timidly, 'to feed the swans.
-You would not care to go so far?'
-
-'On the contrary, I should like it, of all things. A walk by the water on a
-day like this will be quite a treat.'
-
-'Then will you wait a moment? I will go and fetch the bread.' She returned
-soon after with a small basket; and a large retriever, tied up in the
-corner of the yard, barked and lugged at his chain. 'He knows where I am
-going, and is afraid I shall forget him--aren't you, dear old Don? You
-wouldn't like to miss a walk with your mistress, would you, dear?' The dog
-bounded and rushed from side to side; it was with difficulty that Emily
-loosed him. Once free, he galloped down the drive, returning at intervals
-for a caress and a sniff at the basket which his mistress carried. 'There's
-nothing there for you, my beautiful Don!'
-
-The drive sloped from the house down to the artificial water, passing under
-some large elms; and in the twilight of the branches where the sunlight
-played, and the silence was tremulous with wings, Hubert felt that Emily
-had forgiven him. She wore the same black dress that he had admired her in
-the night before; her waist was confined by the same black band; but the
-chestnut hair seemed more beautiful beneath the black silk sunshade, leaned
-so gracefully, the black handle held between thumb and forefinger. And the
-little black figure seemed a part of the beautiful English park, now so
-green and fragrant in all the flower and sunlight of June, and decorated
-with a blue summer sky, and white clouds moving lazily over the tops of the
-trees. And the impression of the beautiful park was enforced by its
-reflection, which lay, with the mute magic of reflected things, in the
-still water, stirred only when, with exquisite motion of webbed feet, the
-swans propelled their freshness to and fro, balancing themselves in the
-current where they knew the bread must surely fall.
-
-'They are waiting for me. Cannot you see their black eyes turned towards
-the bridge?' And she threw the bread from the basket, and the beautiful
-birds unbent their curved necks, devouring it voraciously under the water.
-
-In the larger portion of this artificial lake there were two islands,
-thickly wooded. In the smaller, which lay behind Emily and Hubert, there
-was one small island covered with reeds and low bushes, and this was a
-favourite haunt for the waterfowl, which now came swimming forward, not
-daring to approach too near the dangerous swans.
-
-'These are my friends,' said Emily. 'They will follow me to the other end,
-and I shall be able to feed them as we walk along the meadow.'
-
-Don and Dandy bounded through the tall grass; sometimes foolishly giving
-chase to the birds that rose up out of the golden grasses, barking in mad
-eagerness--sometimes pursuing a hare into the distant woods. The last chase
-had led them far, and both dogs returned panting to walk till they
-recovered breath by their mistress's side; and to satisfy the retriever's
-affection Emily held one hand to him. Playing gently with his ears, she
-said--
-
-'Did you ever see much of Mr. Burnett?'
-
-'Not since I was a boy, ten or twelve years ago, when I was at the
-University. There was absolutely no reason for his doing what he did.'
-
-'Yes; there was,' she said in a strangely decisive tone.
-
-'May I ask----'
-
-'I do not know if I ought to tell you. It would be better not to. You
-know,' she continued, speaking now with a nervous tremor in her voice,
-'that I do not want you to think that I am so very disappointed. I do not
-know that I am disappointed at all. You have acted so generously, and it
-will be pleasanter to live here with you than with that old man.'
-
-The conversation fell; but the sweet meadow seemed to induce confidences,
-and they were so happy in their youth and the sorcery of the sunshine.
-'Five years ago I wrote to him,' said Hubert, speaking very slowly, 'asking
-him to lend me fifty pounds, and he refused. Since then I have not heard
-from him.' At the end of a long silence, the girl said--
-
-'So long as you know that I am no longer angry with him for having
-disinherited me, I do not mind telling you the reason. Two months before he
-died he asked me to marry him, and I refused.'
-
-They walked several yards without speaking.
-
-'Do you not think I was right? I was only eighteen, and he was over sixty.'
-
-'It seems to me quite shocking that he could have even contemplated such a
-thing.'
-
-'But look at these poor ducks; they have followed us all the way, and I
-have forgotten to feed them!' Taking out all the bread that remained in the
-basket, Emily threw it to the ducks that had collected where the dammed-up
-stream that filled the lake trickled over a wooden sluice. There was a
-plank by which to cross the deep cutting. Hubert and Emily paused, and
-stood gazing at the large beech wood that swept over some rising ground.
-Don had not been seen for some time, and they both shouted to him.
-Presently a black mass was seen bounding through the flowers, and the
-panting animal once more ensconced himself by his mistress's side.
-
-'I was very fond of Mr. Burnett,' she said, 'but I could not marry him. I
-could not marry any man I did not love.'
-
-'And because you refused to marry him, he did not mention you in his will.
-I never heard of such selfishness before!'
-
-'Men are always selfish,' she said sententiously. 'But it really does not
-matter; things are just the same; he hasn't succeeded in altering
-anything--at least, not for the worse. We shall get on very well together.'
-
-The conversation paused. Then Emily went on: 'You won't tell any one I told
-you? I only told you because I did not want you to think me selfish. I was
-afraid that after the foolish way I behaved last night you might think I
-hated you. Indeed, I do not. Perhaps everything has happened for the best.
-I was very fond of the old man. I gave him my whole heart; no father ever
-had a daughter more attached; but I could not marry him. And it was the
-remembrance of my love for him that made me burst out crying. I do not
-think I realised until I saw you how cruelly I had been treated. But you
-won't tell any one? You won't tell Mrs. Bentley? She knows, of course; but
-do not tell her that I told you. I do not care that my feelings should be
-made a subject of discussion. You promise me?'
-
-'I promise you.'
-
-They had now reached the tennis-lawn. The gong sounded, and Emily said,
-'That is lunch, and we shall find Julia waiting for us in the dining-room.'
-It was as she said. Mrs. Bentley was standing by the sideboard, her basket
-of keys in her hand; she had not quite finished her housekeeping, and was
-giving some last instructions to the butler. Hubert noticed that the place
-at the head of the table was for him, and he sat down a little embarrassed,
-to carve a chicken. So much home after so many years of homelessness seemed
-strange.
-
-
-
-
-XI
-
-
-On the third day, as soon as breakfast was over, Hubert introduced the
-subject of his departure. Julia waited, but as Emily did not speak, she
-said, 'We thought you liked the country better than town.'
-
-'So I do, but----'
-
-'He's tired of us, and we had better leave,' Emily said, abruptly.
-
-Hubert started a little; he looked appealingly at Julia, and seeing the
-look of genuine pain upon his face, she took pity on him. 'You should not
-speak like that, Emily dear; I can see that you pain Mr. Price very much.'
-
-'I hope, Emily, that you will stay here as long as you like,' he said, in a
-low, gentle voice; 'as long as it is convenient and agreeable to you.'
-
-'We cannot stay here without you,' Emily replied; 'we are your guests.'
-
-'And,' said Julia, smiling, 'if there are guests, there must be a host. But
-if you have business in London, of course you must go.'
-
-'I was not thinking of myself,' said Hubert, 'but of you ladies. I was
-afraid that you were already tired of me; that you might like to be left
-alone; that you had business, preparations. I daresay I was all wrong; but
-if Emily knew----'
-
-'I'm sorry, Hubert; I did not mean to offend you. I'm very unlucky. You'll
-forgive me.'
-
-'I've nothing to forgive; I only hope that you'll never think again that I
-want to get rid of you. I hope that you'll stop at Ashwood as long as ever
-it suits you to do so. I don't see how I can say more.'
-
-'I like to stop here as long as you are here,' Emily said, in a low voice.
-'That is all I meant.'
-
-'Then we're all of one mind, I don't want to go back to London. If you
-don't find me in your way, I shall be delighted to stay.'
-
-'Of course,' said Julia, 'we poor country folk can hardly hope to amuse
-you.'
-
-'I don't know about that!' exclaimed Emily. 'Where would he find any one to
-play and sing to him in the evenings as you can?'
-
-The conversation paused, and all were happier that morning, though none
-knew why. Days passed, desultory and sweet, and with a pile of books about
-him, he lay in a long cane chair under the trees; then the book would drop
-on his knees, and blowing smoke in curling wreaths, he lost himself in
-dramatic meditations. It was pleasant to see that Emily had grown
-innocently, childishly fond of her cousin, and her fondness expressed
-itself in a number of pretty ways. 'Now, Hubert, Hubert, get out of my
-way,' she would say, feigning a charming petulance; or she would come and
-drag him out of his chair, saying, 'Come, Hubert, I can't allow you to lie
-there any longer; I have to go to South Water, and want you to come with
-me?'
-
-And walking together, they seemed like an Italian greyhound and a tall,
-shaggy setter.
-
-A cloud only appeared on Emily's face when Julia spoke of their departure.
-Julia had proposed that they should leave at the end of the month, and
-Emily had consented to this arrangement. The end of the month had appeared
-to her indefinitely distant, but three weeks of the subscribed time had
-passed, and signs of departure had become more numerous and more
-peremptory. Allusion had been made to the laundress, and Julia had asked
-Emily if she could get all her things into a single box; if not, they would
-have to send to Brighton for another. Emily had no notion of what her box
-would hold, and she showed little disposition to count her dresses or put
-her linen in order. She seemed entirely taken up thinking what books, what
-pictures, what china she could take away. She would like to have this
-bookcase, and might she not take the wardrobe from her own room? and she
-had known the clock all her life, and it did seem so hard to part with it.
-
-'My dear girl, all these things belong to Mr. Price; you really cannot take
-them away without asking him.'
-
-'But he won't refuse; he'll let me have anything I like.'
-
-'He can't very well refuse, so I think it would be nicer on your part not
-to ask for anything.'
-
-'I must have some of these things: I want to make the house we are going to
-live in, in London, look as much like Ashwood as possible.'
-
-'You'd like to take the whole house with you if you could.'
-
-'Yes; I think I should.' And Emily turned and looked vaguely up and down
-the passage. 'I wonder if he'd give me the picture of the windmill?'
-
-'The landing would look very bare without it.'
-
-'It would indeed, and when we came down here on a visit--for I suppose we
-shall come down here sometimes on visits--I should miss the picture
-dreadfully, so I don't think I'll ask him for it. But I must take some
-pictures away with me. There are a lot of old things in the lumber-room at
-the top of the house, that no one knows anything about. I think I'll ask
-him to let me have them. I'll take him for a good long ramble through the
-house. He hasn't seen any of it yet, except just the rooms we live in
-down-stairs.'
-
-Emily went straight to Hubert. He was lying in the long wicker chair, his
-straw hat drawn over his eyes, for the sun was finding its sharp, white way
-through the leaves of the beeches.
-
-'Now, Hubert, I want you. Are you asleep?'
-
-'Asleep! No, I was only thinking.' He threw his legs over the edge of the
-low chair and stood up.
-
-'If I tell you what I want, you won't refuse me, will you?'
-
-'No,' he said smilingly; 'I don't think I shall.'
-
-'Are you sure?' she said, looking at him enigmatically. Then in a lighter
-tone: 'I want you to give me a lot of things--oh, not a great many, nothing
-very valuable, but----'
-
-'But what, Emily?... You can have anything you want.'
-
-'Well, we shall see. You must come with me; I must show you what--I shan't
-want them unless you like to give them. Come along. Oh, you must come. I
-should not care about them unless you came with me, and let me point them
-out.' She passed her little hand into the arm of his rough coat, and led
-him towards the house. 'You know nothing of your own house, so before I go
-I intend to show you all over it. You have no idea what a funny old place
-it is up-stairs--endless old lumber-rooms which you would never think of
-going into if I didn't take you. When I was a little girl I wasn't often
-allowed down-stairs: the top of the house still seems to me more real than
-any other part.' Throwing open a door at the head of the stairs, she said:
-'This used to be my nursery. It is all bare and deserted now, but I
-remember it quite different. I used to spend hours looking out of that
-window. From it you can see all over the park, and the park used to be my
-great delight. I used to sit there and make resolutions that next time I
-went out I would be braver, and explore the hollows full of bushes and tall
-ferns.'
-
-'Did you never break your resolutions?'
-
-'Sometimes. I was afraid of meeting fairies or elves. There are glades and
-hollows that used to seem very wonderful. And they still seem very
-wonderful, only not quite in the same way. Doesn't the world seem very
-wonderful to you? I'm always wondering at things. But I know I'm only a
-silly little girl, and yet I like to talk to you about my fancies. Down
-there in the beech wood there is a beautiful glade. I loved to play there
-better than anywhere else. I used to lie there on a fur rug and play at
-paper dolls. I always fancied myself a duchess or a princess.'
-
-'You are full of dreams, Emily.'
-
-'Yes; I suppose I am. Everything is pleasant and happy in dreams. I love
-dreaming. They thought I'd never learn to read; but it wasn't because I was
-stupid, but because I wouldn't study. I'd put my hands to my head, and,
-looking at the book, which I didn't see, I'd think of all sorts of things,
-imagine myself a fairy princess.'
-
-'And it was in this room that you dreamed all those dreams?'
-
-'Yes; in this dear old room. You see that picture: that is one of the
-things I intended to ask you to give me.'
-
-'What? That old, dilapidated print?'
-
-'You mustn't abuse my picture. I used to spend hours wondering if those
-horsemen galloping so madly through the wood were robbers, and if they had
-robbed the castle shown between the trees. I used to wonder if they would
-succeed in escaping. They wouldn't gallop their horses like that unless
-they were being pursued.... Can I have the picture?'
-
-'Of course you can. Is that--that is not all you are going to ask me for?'
-
-'I did think of asking you for a few more things. Do you mind?'
-
-'No, not the least. The more you ask for, the more I shall be pleased.'
-
-'Then you must come down-stairs.'
-
-They went down to the next landing. Emily stopped before a bed-room, and,
-looking at Hubert shyly and interrogatively, she said--
-
-'This is my room. I don't know if it is in a fit state to show you. I'm not
-a very tidy girl. I'll look first.'
-
-'Yes; it will do,' she said, drawing back. 'You can look in. I want you to
-give me that wardrobe. It isn't a very handsome one, but I've used it ever
-since I was a little girl; it has a hollow top, and I used to hide things
-there. Do you think you can spare it?'
-
-'Yes; I think I can,' he said, smiling.
-
-Then she led him up-stairs through the old lumber rooms, picking out here
-and there some generally broken and always worthless piece of furniture,
-pleading for it timidly, and strangely delighted when he nodded, granting
-her every request. She asked him to pull out what she had chosen from the
-_débris_, and a curious collection they made in the passage--dim and
-worm-eaten pictures, small book-cases, broken vases which she proposed
-mending.
-
-Hubert wiped the dust from his hands and coat-sleeves.
-
-'What a lot of things you have given me! Now we shall be able to get on
-nicely with our furnishing.'
-
-'What furnishing?'
-
-'The furnishing of the little house in London where Julia and I are going
-to live. You said you intended to add a hundred a year to the three hundred
-a year which Mr. Burnett should have left me; I don't see why you should do
-such a thing, but if you do we shall have four hundred a year to live upon.
-Julia says that we shall then be able to afford to give fifty pounds a year
-for a house. We can get a very nice little house, she says, for that--of
-course, in one of the suburbs. The great expense will be the furnishing; we
-are going to do it on the hire system. I daresay one can get very nice
-things in that way, but I do want to make the place look a little like
-Ashwood; that is why I'm asking you for these things. I was always fond of
-playing in these old lumber-rooms, and these dim old pictures, which I
-don't think any one knows anything of except myself, will remind me of
-Ashwood. They will look very well, indeed, hanging round our little
-dining-room. You are sure you don't want them, do you?'
-
-'No; I won't want them. I'm only too pleased to be able to give them to
-you.'
-
-'You are very good, indeed you are. Look at these old haymakers; I never
-saw but one little corner of this picture before; it was stowed away behind
-a lot of lumber, and I hadn't the strength to pull it out.... I'm afraid
-you've got yourself rather dusty.'
-
-'Oh no; it will brush off.'
-
-'I shall hang this picture over the fireplace; it will look very well
-there. I daresay you don't see anything in it, but I'd sooner have these
-pictures than those down-stairs. I love the picture of the windmill on the
-first landing----'
-
-'Then why not have it? I'll have it taken down at once.'
-
-'No; I could not think of taking it. How would the landing look without it?
-I should miss it dreadfully when I came here--for I daresay you will ask us
-to visit you occasionally, when you are lonely, won't you?'
-
-'My dear Emily, whenever you like, I hope you will come here.'
-
-'And you will come and stay with us in London? Your room will be always
-ready; I'll look after that. We shall feel very offended, indeed, if you
-ever think of going to an hotel. Of course, you mustn't expect much; we
-shall only be able to keep one servant, but we shall try to make you
-comfortable, and, when you come, you'll take me to the theatres, to see one
-of your own plays.'
-
-'If my play's being played, certainly. But would it be right for me to pay
-you visits in London?'
-
-'They would be very wicked people indeed who saw anything wrong in it; you
-are my cousin. But why do you say such things? You destroy all my pleasure,
-and I was so happy just now.'
-
-'I'm afraid, Emily, your happiness hangs on a very slender thread.'
-
-She looked at him inquiringly, but feeling that it would be unwise to
-attempt an explanation, he said in a different tone--
-
-'But, Emily, if you love Ashwood so well, why do you go away?'
-
-'Why do I go away? We have been here now some time.... I can't live here
-always.'
-
-'Why not? Why not let things go on just as they are?'
-
-'And live here with you, I and Julia?'
-
-'Yes; why not?'
-
-'We should bore you; you want to write your plays, you'd get tired of me.'
-
-'Your being here would not prevent my writing my plays. I have been
-thinking all the while of asking you to remain, but was afraid you would
-not care to live here.'
-
-'Not care to live here! But you'll get tired of us; we might quarrel.'
-
-'No; we shall never quarrel. You will be doing me a great favour by
-remaining. Just fancy living alone in this great house, not a soul to speak
-to all day! I'm sure I should end by going out and hanging myself on one of
-those trees.'
-
-'You wouldn't do that, would you?'
-
-Hubert laughed. 'You and Mrs. Bentley will be doing me a great favour by
-remaining. If you go away I shall be robbed right and left, the gardens
-will go to rack and ruin, and when you come down here you won't know the
-place, and then, perhaps, we shall quarrel.'
-
-'I shouldn't like Ashwood to go to rack and ruin--and my poor flowers! And
-I'm sure you'd forget to feed the swans. If you did that, I could not
-forgive you.'
-
-'Well, let these grave considerations decide you to remain.'
-
-'Are you really serious?'
-
-'I never was more serious in my life.'
-
-'Well then, may I run and tell Julia?'
-
-'Certainly, and I'll--no, I won't. I'll look up the housemaids and tell
-them to restore this interesting collection of antiquities to their
-original dust.'
-
-
-
-
-XII
-
-
-He was, perhaps, a little too conscious of his happiness; and he feared to
-do anything that would endanger the pleasure of his present life. It seemed
-to him like a costly thing which might slip from his hand or be broken; and
-day by day he appreciated more and more the delicate comfort of this
-well-ordered house--its brightness, its ample rooms, the charm of space
-within and without, the health of regular and wholesome meals, the presence
-of these two women, whose first desire was to minister to his least wish or
-caprice. These, the first spoilings he had received, combined to render him
-singularly happy. Bohemianism, he often thought, had been forced upon
-him--it was not natural to him, and though spiritual belief was dead, he
-experienced in church a resurrection of influences which misfortune had
-hypnotised, but which were stirring again into life. He was conscious again
-of this revival of his early life in the evenings when Mrs. Bentley went to
-the piano; and when playing a game of chess or draughts, remembrances of
-the old Shropshire rectory came back, sudden, distinct, and sweet. In these
-days the disease of fame and artistic achievement only sang monotonously,
-plaintively, like the wind in the valleys where the wind never wholly
-rests.
-
-Sometimes, when moved by the novel he was reading, he would discuss its
-merits and demerits with the two women who sat by him in the quiet of the
-dim drawing-room, their work on their knees, thinking of him. In the
-excitement of criticism his thoughts wandered to his own work, and the
-women's eyes filled with reveries, and their hands folded languidly over
-their knees. He spoke without emphasis, his words seeming to drop from the
-thick obsession of his dream. At ten the ladies gathered up their work,
-bade him good-night; and nightly these good-nights grew tenderer, and
-nightly they went up-stairs more deeply penetrated with a sense of their
-happiness. But at heart he was a man's man. He hardly perceived life from a
-woman's point of view; and in the long evenings which he spent with these
-women he sometimes had to force himself to appear interested in their
-conversation. He was as far removed from one as from the other. Emily's
-wilfulness puzzled him, and he did not seem to have anything further to
-talk about to Mrs. Bentley.
-
-He missed the bachelor evenings of former days--the whisky and water, the
-pipes, and the literary discussion; and as the days went by he began to
-think of London; his thoughts turned affectionately towards the friends he
-had not seen for so long, and at the end of July he announced his intention
-of running up to town for a few days. So one morning breakfast was hurried
-through; Emily was sure there was plenty of time; Hubert looked at the
-clock and said he must be off; Julia ran after him with parcels which he
-had forgotten; farewell signs were waved; the dog-cart passed out of sight,
-and, after lingering a moment, the women returned to the drawing-room
-thoughtfully.
-
-'I wonder if he'll catch the train,' said Emily, without taking her face
-from the window.
-
-'I hope so; it will be very tiresome for him if he has to come back. There
-isn't another train before three o'clock.'
-
-'If he missed this train he wouldn't go until to-morrow morning.... I
-wonder how long he'll stay away. Supposing something happened, and he never
-came back!' Emily turned round and looked at Julia in dreamy wonderment.
-
-'Not come back at all? What nonsense you are talking, Emily! He won't be
-away more than a fortnight or three weeks.'
-
-'Three weeks! that seems a very long while. How shall we get through our
-evenings?'
-
-Emily had again turned towards the window. Julia did not trouble to reply.
-She smiled a little, as she paused on the threshold, for she remembered
-that no more than a few weeks ago Emily had addressed to her passionate
-speeches declaring her to be her only friend, and that they would like to
-live together, content in each other's companionship, always ignoring the
-rest of the world. Although she had not mistaken these speeches for
-anything more than the nervous passion of a moment, the suddenness of the
-recantation surprised her a little. Three or four days after, the girl was
-in a different mood, and when they came into the drawing-room after dinner
-she threw her arms about Julia's neck, saying, 'Isn't this like old times?
-Here we are, living all alone together, and I'm not boring myself a bit. I
-never shall have another friend like you, Julia.'
-
-'But you'll be very glad when Hubert comes back.'
-
-'There's no harm in that, is there? I should be very ungrateful if I
-wasn't. Think how good he has been to us.... I'm afraid you don't like him,
-Julia.'
-
-'Oh, yes, I do, Emily.'
-
-'Not so much as I do.' And raising herself--she was sitting on Julia's
-knees--Emily looked at Julia.
-
-'Perhaps not,' Julia replied, smiling; 'but then I never hated him as much
-as you did.'
-
-A cloud came over Emily's face. 'I did hate him, didn't I? You remember
-that first evening? You remember when you came up-stairs and found me
-trembling in the passage--I was afraid to go to bed. ... I begged you to
-allow me to sleep with you. You remember how we listened for his footstep
-in the passage, as he went up to bed, and how I clung to you? Then the
-dreams of that night. I never told you what my dreams were, but you
-remember how I woke up with a cry, and you asked me what was the matter?'
-
-'Yes, I remember.'
-
-'I dreamt I was with him in a garden, and was trying to get away; but he
-held me by a single hair, and the hair would not break. How absurd dreams
-are! And the garden was full of flowers, but every time I tried to gather
-them, he pulled me back by that single hair. I don't remember any more,
-only something about running wildly away from him, and losing myself in a
-dark forest, and there the ground was soft like a bog, and it seemed as if
-I were going to be swallowed up every moment. It was a terrible sensation.
-All of a sudden I woke with a cry. The room was grey with dawn, and you
-said: "Emily dear, what have you been dreaming, to cry out like that?" I
-was too tired and frightened to tell you much about my dream, and next
-morning I had forgotten it. I did not remember it for a long time after,
-but all the same some of it came true. Don't you remember how I met Hubert
-next morning on the lawn? We went into the garden and spent the best part
-of the morning walking about the lake.... I don't know if I told you--I ran
-away when I heard him coming, and should have got away had it not been for
-this tiresome dog. He called after me, using my Christian name. I was so
-angry I think I hated him then more than ever. We walked a little way, and
-the next thing I remember was thinking how nice he was. I don't know how it
-all happened. Now I think of it, it seems like magic. It was the day that
-my old donkey ran away with the mowing machine and broke the flower-vase,
-the dear old thing; we had a long talk about "Jack." And then I took Hubert
-into the garden and showed him the flowers. I don't think he cares much
-about flowers; he pretended, but I could see it was only to please me. Then
-I knew that he liked me, for when I told him I was going to feed the swans,
-he said he loved swans and begged to be allowed to come too. I don't think
-a man would say that if he didn't like you, do you?'
-
-Emily's mind seemed to contain nothing but memories of Hubert. What he had
-said on this occasion, how he had looked at her on another. The
-conversation paused and Emily sunned herself in the enchantment of
-recollection, until at last breaking forth again, she said--
-
-'Have you noticed how Ethel Eastwick goes after him? And the odd part of it
-is, that she can't see that he dislikes her. He thinks nothing of her
-singing; he remained talking to me in the conservatory the whole time. I
-asked him to come into the drawing-room, but he pretended to misunderstand
-me, and asked me if I felt a draught. He said, "Let me get you a shawl." I
-said, "I assure you, Hubert, I don't feel any draught." But he would not
-believe me, and said he could not allow me to sit there without something
-on my shoulders. I begged of him not to move, for I knew that Ethel would
-never forgive me if I interrupted her singing; but he said he could get me
-a wrap without interrupting any one. He opened the conservatory door, ran
-across the lawn round to the front door, and came back with--what do you
-think? With two wraps instead of one; one was mine, and the other belonged
-to--I don't know who it belonged to. So I said, "Oh, what ever shall we do?
-I cannot let you go back again. If any one was to come in and find me
-alone, what ever would they think!" Hubert said, "Will you come with me? A
-walk in the garden will be pleasanter than sitting in the conservatory." I
-didn't like going at first, but I thought there couldn't be much harm.'
-
-It seemed to Emily very terrible and very wonderful, and she experienced
-throughout her numbed sense a strange, thrilling pain, akin to joy, and she
-sat, her little fragile form lost in the arm-chair, her great eyes fixed in
-ecstasy, seeing still the dark garden with the great star risen like a
-phantom above the trees. That evening had been to her a wonder and an
-enchantment, and her pausing thoughts dwelt on the moment when the distant
-sound of a bell reached their ears, and the bell came nearer, clanging
-fiercely in the sonorous garden. Then they saw a light--some one had come
-for them with a lantern--a joke, a suitable pleasantry, and amid joyous
-laughter, watching the setting moon, they had gone back to the tiled house,
-where dancers still passed the white-curtained windows. Hubert had sat by
-her at supper, serving her with meat and drink. In the sway of memory she
-trembled and started, looking in the great arm-chair like a little bird
-that the moon keeps awake in its soft nest. She no longer wished to tell
-Julia of that night in the garden; her sensation of it lay far beyond
-words; it was her secret, and it shone through her dreamy youth even as the
-star had shone through the heavens that night. Suddenly she said--
-
-'I wonder what Hubert is doing in London? I wonder where he is now?'
-
-'Now? It is just nine. I suppose he's in some theatre.'
-
-'I suppose he goes a great deal to the theatre. I wonder who he goes with.
-He has lots of friends in London--actresses, I suppose; he knows them who
-play in his plays. He dines at his club----'
-
-'Or at a restaurant.'
-
-'I wonder what a restaurant is like; ladies dine at restaurants, don't
-they?'
-
-As Julia was about to make reply, the servant brought her a letter. She
-opened the envelope, and took out a long, closely-written letter; she
-turned it over to see the signature, and then looking toward Emily, she
-said, with a pleasant smile--
-
-'Now I shall be able to answer your questions better; this letter is from
-Mr. Price.'
-
-'Oh, what does he say? Read it.'
-
-'Wait a moment, let me glance through it first; it is very difficult to
-read.' A few moments after, Julia said, 'There's not much that would
-interest you in the letter, Emily; it is all about his play. He says he
-would have written before if he had not been so busy looking out for a
-theatre, and engaging actors and actresses. He hopes to start rehearsing
-next week.
-
-"I say I hope, because there are still some parts of the play which do not
-satisfy me, particularly the third act. I intend to work steadily on the
-play till, next Thursday, five or six hours every day; I am in perfect
-health and spirits, and ought to be able to get the thing right. Should I
-fail to satisfy myself, or should any further faults appear when we begin
-to rehearse the piece, I shall dismiss my people, pack up my traps, and
-return to Ashwood. There I shall have quiet; here, people are continually
-knocking at my door, and I cannot deny my friends the pleasure of seeing
-me, if that is a pleasure. But at Ashwood, as I say, I shall be sure of
-quiet, and can easily finish the play this autumn, and February is a better
-time than September to produce a play."'
-
-'Then he goes on,' said Julia, 'to explain the alterations he contemplates
-making. There's no use reading you all that.'
-
-'I suppose you think I should not understand.'
-
-'My dear Emily, if you want to read the letter, there it is.'
-
-'I don't want to see your letter.'
-
-'What do you mean, Emily?'
-
-'Nothing, only I think it rather strange that he didn't write to me.'
-
-Some days after, Emily took up the book that Julia had laid down.
-'"Shakespeare's Plays." I suppose you are reading them so that you'll be
-able to talk to him better.'
-
-'I never thought of such a thing, Emily.' At the end of a long silence
-Emily said--
-
-'Do you think clever men like clever women?'
-
-'I don't know. Some say they do, some say they don't. I believe that really
-clever men, men of genius, don't.'
-
-'I wonder if Hubert is a man of genius. What do you think?'
-
-'I really am not capable of expressing an opinion on the matter.'
-
-Another week passed away, and Emily began to assume an air of languor and
-timid yearning. One day she said--
-
-'I wonder he doesn't write. He hasn't answered my letter yet. Has he
-answered yours?'
-
-'He has not written to me again. He hasn't time for letter-writing. He is
-working night and day at his play.'
-
-'I suppose he'd never think of coming down by the morning train. He'd be
-sure to come by the five o'clock.'
-
-'He won't come without writing. He'd be sure to write for the dog-cart.'
-
-'I suppose so. There's no use in looking out for him.'
-
-But, notwithstanding her certitude on the point, Emily could not help
-choosing five o'clock as the time for a walk, and Julia noticed that the
-girl's feet seemed to turn instinctively towards the lodge. Often she would
-leave the flowers she was tending on the terrace, and stand looking through
-the dim, sun-smitten landscape toward the red-brown spot, which was
-Southwater, in the middle of the long plain.
-
-
-
-
-XIII
-
-
-Hubert felt called upon to entertain his friends, and one evening they all
-sat dining at Hurlingham in the long room. The conversation, as usual, had
-been about books and pictures.
-
-It was the moment when strings of lanterns were hoisted from tree to tree.
-In front of a large space of sky the coloured globes were crude and
-trivial; but in the shadows of the trees by the river, where the mist rose
-into the branches, they had begun to awaken the first impression of
-melancholy and the sadness of _fête_. It was the moment when the great
-trees hung heavy and motionless, strangely green and solemn beneath a
-slate-coloured sky; and the plaintive waltz cried on Hungarian
-fiddle-strings, till it seemed the soul of this feminine evening. The
-fashionable crowd had moved out upon the lawn; the white dresses were
-phantom blue, and the men's coats faded into obscure masses, darkening the
-gathering shadows. It was the moment when voices soften, and every heart,
-overpowered with yearning, is impelled to tell of grief and disillusion;
-and every moment the wail of the fiddles grew more unbearable, tearing the
-heart to its very depths.
-
-Author and actor-manager walked up the lawn puffing at their cigars. The
-others sat watching, knowing that the opportunity had come for criticism of
-their friend.
-
-'He does not change much,' said Harding. 'Circumstances haven't affected
-him. A year ago he lived in a garret re-writing his play _Divorce_. He now
-rewrites _Divorce_ in a handsome house in Sussex.'
-
-'I thought he had finished his play,' said Thompson. 'I heard that he was
-going to take a theatre and produce it himself.'
-
-'But did you not hear him say at dinner that he was re-writing as he
-rehearsed? I met one of the actors yesterday. He doesn't know what to make
-of it. He gets a new part every week to learn.'
-
-'Do you think he'll ever produce it?'
-
-'I doubt it. At the last moment he'll find that the third act doesn't
-satisfy him, and will postpone the production till the spring.'
-
-'What do you think of his work?'
-
-'Very intelligent, but a little insipid--like himself. Look at him. _Il est
-bien l'homme de ses ouvres_. There is something dry about him, and his
-writings are like himself--hard, dry and wanting in personal passion.'
-
-'Yet he talks charmingly, with vivacity and intelligence, and he is so full
-of appreciation of Shakespeare, Goethe, and such genuine love for
-antiquity.'
-
-'I've heard him talk Shakespeare, Goethe, and Ibsen,' said Harding, 'but I
-never heard him say anything new, anything personal. It seems to me that
-you mistake quotation for perception. He assimilates, but he originates
-nothing. He has read a great deal; he is covered with literature like a
-rock with moss and lichen. He's appreciative, I will say that for him. He
-would make a capital editor, or a tutor, or a don, an Oxford don. He would
-be perfectly happy as a don; he could read up the German critics and
-expound Sophocles. He would be perfectly happy as a don. As it is, he is
-perfectly miserable.'
-
-'There was a fellow who had a studio over mine,' said Thompson. 'He had
-been in the army and used to paint a bit. The academy by chance hung a
-portrait, so he left the army and turned portrait-painter. One day he saw a
-picture by Velasquez, and he understood how horrid were the red things he
-used to send to the academy. He used to come down to see me; he used to
-say, "I wish I had never seen a picture, by Gad, it is driving me out of my
-mind." Poor chap, I wanted him to go back to the army. I said, Why paint?
-no one forces you to; it makes you miserable; don't do so any more. When
-you have anything to say, art is a joy; when you haven't, it is a curse to
-yourself and to others.'
-
-Philipps, the editor of _The Cosmopolitan_, turned towards Harding, and he
-said--
-
-'I cannot follow you in your estimate of Hubert Price. I don't see him
-either mentally or physically as you do. It seems to me that you distort
-the facts to make them fit in with your theory. He is tall and thin, but I
-do not think that his nature is hard and dry. I should, on the contrary,
-say that he was of a soft rather than a hard nature. The expression of his
-face is mild and melancholy. I do not detect the dry, hard, rocky basis of
-which you speak. I should say that Price was a sentimental man.'
-
-'I have never heard of him being in love,' said Harding. 'I should say that
-he had been entirely uninfluenced by women.'
-
-'But love of women is only one form of sentimentality and not the highest,
-nor the deepest,' said Philipps. 'I can imagine a man being exceedingly
-sentimental and not caring about women at all.'
-
-'What you say is true,' said Harding. His face showed that he felt the
-observation to be true and was interested in it. 'But I think I described
-him truly when I said he was like a rock overgrown with moss and lichen.
-There is not sufficient root-hold for any idea to grow in him, it withers
-and dies. Examine his literature, and you'll see it is as I say. He has
-written some remarkable plays, I don't say he hasn't. But they seem to be
-better than they are. He gets a picturesque situation, but there is always
-something mechanical about it. There's a human emotion somewhere, but it's
-never really there; it might have been, but it is not.... It is very well
-done, it is very intelligent; but it does not seem to live, to
-palpitate.... In like manner there are men who have read everything, who
-understand everything, who can theorise; they can tell you all about the
-masterpiece, but when it comes to producing one, well, they're not on in
-that scene.'
-
-'What an excellent character he would make in a novel! A drama of
-sterility,' said Phillips.
-
-'Or the dramas which they bring about,' said Harding.
-
-'Yes, or the dramas they bring about. But what drama can Price bring
-about--he shuts himself up in a room and tries to write a play,' said
-Phillips. 'I don't see how he can dramatise any life but his own.'
-
-'All deviations from the normal tend to bring about drama,' said Harding.
-
-'Then, why don't you do a Hubert Price in a book? It would be most
-interesting. Do you think you ever will?'
-
-'I don't think so.'
-
-'Why not? Because he is a friend of yours, and you would not like----'
-
-'I never allow my private life to interfere with my literature. No; for
-quite other reasons. I admit that he represents physically and mentally a
-great deal of the intellectual impotence current in our time. But it would
-be difficult, I think, to bring vividly before the reader that tall, thin,
-blonde man, with his pale gentle eyes and his insipid mind. I should take
-quite a different kind of man as my model.'
-
-'What kind of man?' said Phillips, and the five or six writers and painters
-leaned forward to listen to Harding.
-
-'I think I should imagine a man about the medium height. A nice figure,
-light, trim, neat. Good-looking, straight nose, eyes bright and
-intelligent. I think he would have beard, a very close-cut beard. The turn
-of his mind would be metaphysical and poetic--an intense subtility of mind
-combined with much order. He would be full of little habits. He would have
-note-books of a special kind in which to enter his ideas. The tendency of
-his mind would be towards concision, and he would by degrees extend his
-desire for concision into the twilight and the night of symbolism.'
-
-'A sort of constipated Browning,' said Phillips.
-
-'Exactly,' said Harding.
-
-'And would you have him married?' asked John Norton.
-
-'Certainly. I imagine him living in a tiny little house somewhere near the
-river--Westminster or Chelsea. His wife would be a dreadful person, thin,
-withered, herring-gutted--a sort of red herring with a cap. But his
-daughter would be charming, she would have inherited her father's features.
-I can imagine these women living in admiration of this man, tending on him,
-speaking very little, removed from worldly influences, seeing only the
-young men who come every Tuesday evening to listen to the poet's
-conversation--I don't hear them saying much--I can see them sitting in a
-corner listening for the ten thousandth time to aestheticisms not one word
-of which they understand, and about ten o'clock stealing away to some
-mysterious chamber. Something of the poet's sterility would have descended
-upon them.'
-
-'That is how you imagine _un génie raté_,' said Phillips. 'Your
-conception is clear enough; why don't you write the book?'
-
-'Because there is nothing more to say on the subject. It is a subject for a
-sketch, not for a book. But of this I'm sure, that the dry-rock man would
-come out more clearly in a book than the soft, insipid, gentle,
-companionable, red-bearded fellow.'
-
-'If Price were the dry, sterile nature you describe, we should feel no
-interest in him, we should not be discussing him as we are,' said Phillips.
-
-'Yes, we should--Price suffers; we're interested in him because he
-suffers--because he suffers in public--"I never was happy except on those
-rare occasions when I thought I was a great man." In that sentence you'll
-find the clew to his attractiveness. But in him there is nothing of the
-irresponsible passion which is genius. There's that little Rose
-Massey--that little baby who spends half her day dreaming, and who is as
-ignorant as a cod-fish. Well, she has got that something--that undefinable
-but always recognisable something. It was Price who discovered her. We used
-to laugh at him when he said she had genius. He was right; we were wrong.
-The other night I was standing in the wings; she was coming down from her
-dressing-room--she lingered on the stairs, looking the most insignificant
-little thing you can well imagine; but the moment her cue came a strange
-light came into her eyes and a strange life was fused in her limbs; she was
-transformed, and went on the stage a very symbol of passion and romance.'
-
-The slate colour of the sky did not seem to change, and yet the night grew
-visibly denser in the park; and there had come the sensation of things
-ended, a movement of wraps thrown over shoulders and thought of bedtime and
-home. The crowd was moving away, and nearly lost in the darkness Hubert
-came towards his friends. He had just knocked the ash from his cigar, and
-as he drew in the smoke the glow of the lighted end fled over his blonde
-face.
-
-
-
-
-XIV
-
-
-One day a short letter came from Hubert, asking Mrs. Bentley to send the
-dog-cart to the station to fetch him. He had decided to come home at once,
-and postpone the production of his play till the coming spring.
-
-Every rehearsal had revealed new and serious faults of construction. These
-he had attempted to remove when he went home in the evening, but though he
-often worked till daybreak, he did not achieve much. The very knowledge
-that he must come to rehearsal with the re-written scene seemed to produce
-in him a sort of mental paralysis, and, striking the table with his fist,
-he would get up, and a thought would cross his mind of how he might escape
-from this torture. After one terrible night, in which he feared his brain
-was really giving way, he went down to the theatre and dismissed the
-company, for he had resolved to return to Ashwood and spend another autumn
-and another winter re-writing _The Gipsy_. If it did not come right then,
-he would bother no more about it. Why should he? There was so much else in
-life besides literature. He had plenty of money, and was determined in any
-case to enjoy himself. So did his thoughts run as he leaned back on the
-cushions of a first-class carriage, glancing casually through the evening
-paper. Presently his eye was caught by a paragraph narrating an odd
-calamity which had overtaken a scene carpenter, an honest, respectable,
-sober, hard-working man, who had fulfilled all social obligations as
-perfectly as the most exacting could desire, until the day he had conceived
-the idea of a machine for the better exhibition of advertisements on the
-hoardings. His system was based on the roller-towel. The roller was moved
-by clockwork, and the advertisements went round like the towel. At first he
-spent his spare time and his spare money upon it, but as the hobby took
-possession of him, he devoted all his time and all his money to it; then he
-pawned his clothes, and then he raised money on the furniture; the brokers
-came in, and finally the poor fellow was taken to a lunatic asylum, and his
-wife and family were thrown on the parish. The story impressed Hubert
-strangely. He saw an analogy between himself and the crazy inventor, and he
-asked himself if he would go on re-writing _The Gipsy_ until he went out of
-his mind. 'Even if I do,' he thought, 'I can hurt no one but myself. No one
-else is dependent on me; my hobby can hurt no one but myself.' These
-forebodings passed away, and his mind filled up with schemes of work. He
-knew exactly what he wanted to do, and he looked forward to doing it. He
-wanted quiet, he wanted long days alone with himself. Such were his
-thoughts in the dog-cart as he drove home, and it was therefore vaguely
-unpleasant to him to meet the two ladies waiting for him at the lodge gate.
-Their smiles of welcome irritated him; he longed for the solitude of his
-study, the companionship of his work; and instead he had to sit with them
-in the drawing-room, and tell them how he liked London, what he had done
-there, whom he had seen there, and why he had been unable to finish his
-play to his satisfaction.
-
-In the morning Emily or Mrs. Bentley was generally about to pour out his
-coffee for him and keep him company. One day Hubert noticed that it was no
-longer Mrs. Bentley but Emily who met him in the passage, and followed him
-into the dining-room. And while he was eating she sat with her feet on the
-fender, talking of some girls in the neighbourhood--their jealousies, and
-how Edith Eastwick could not think of anything for herself, but always
-copied her dresses. Dandy drowsed at her feet, and very often she would
-take him to the window and make him go through all his tricks, calling on
-Hubert to admire him.
-
-She had a knack of monopolising Hubert, and since his return from London,
-her desire to do so had become almost a determination. Hubert showed no
-disinclination, and after breakfast they were to be seen together in the
-gardens. Hubert was a great catch, and there were other young ladies eager
-to be agreeable to him; but he did not seem to desire flirtation with any.
-So they came to speak of him as a very clever man, no doubt; but as they
-knew nothing about plays, he very probably did not care to talk to them.
-Hubert was not attractive in general society, and he would soon have failed
-to interest them at all had it not been for Emily. She was proud of her
-influence over him, and for the first time showed a desire to go into
-society. Day by day her conversation turned more and more on
-tennis-parties, and she even spoke about a ball. He consented to take her;
-and he had to dance with her, and she refused nearly every one, saying she
-was tired, leading Hubert away for long conversations in the galleries and
-on the staircases. Hubert had positively nothing to say to her; but she
-seemed quite happy as long as she was with him. And as they drove through
-the dawn Emily chattered of a hundred trifles,--what Edith had said, what
-Mabel wore, of the possibility of a marriage, and the arrival of a
-detachment of some cavalry regiment. Hubert found it hard to affect
-interest in these conversations. His brain was weary with waltz tunes, the
-shape of shoulders, and the glare and rustle of silk; but as she chattered,
-rubbing the misted windows from time to time, so as to determine how far
-they were from home, he wondered if he should ever marry, and half
-playfully he thought of her as his wife.
-
-But without warning his dreams were broken by a sudden thought, and he
-said--
-
-'Another time, I think it will be better, my dear Emily, that Mrs. Bentley
-should take you out.'
-
-'Why should you not take me out?... I suppose you don't care to--I bore
-you.'
-
-'No; on the contrary, I enjoy it--I like to see you amused; but I think you
-should have a proper chaperon.'
-
-Emily did not answer; and a little cloud came over her face. Hubert thought
-she looked even prettier in her displeasure than she had done in her joy;
-and he went to sleep thinking of her. Never had he thought her so
-beautiful--never had she touched him with so personal an interest; and next
-morning, when he lounged in his study, he was glad to hear her knock at the
-door; and the half-hour he spent with her there, yielding to her pleading
-to come for a walk with her, or drive her over to Southwater in the
-dog-cart, was one of unalloyed pleasure. But a few days after, as he lay in
-bed, a new idea came to him for his third act. So he said he would have
-breakfast in his study. He dressed, thinking the whole time how he could
-round off his idea and bring it into the act. So clear and precise did it
-seem in his mind that he sat down immediately after breakfast, forgetting
-even his matutinal cigar, and wrote with a flowing pen. He had left orders
-that he was not to be disturbed; and was annoyed when the door opened and
-Emily entered.
-
-'I am very sorry, but you must not be cross with me; I do so want you to
-come and see the Eastwicks with me.'
-
-'My dear Emily, I could not think of such a thing this morning. I am very
-busy--indeed I am.'
-
-'What are you doing? Nothing very important, I can see. You are only
-writing your play. You might come with me.'
-
-'My play is as important to me as a visit to the Eastwicks is to you,' he
-answered, smiling.
-
-'I have promised Edith.... I really do wish you would come.'
-
-'My dear Emily, it is quite impossible: do let me get on with my work!'
-
-Emily's face instantly changed expression; she turned to leave the room,
-and Hubert had to go after her and beg her to forgive him--he really had
-not meant to be rude to her.
-
-'You don't care to talk to me. I am not clever enough for you.'
-
-Then pity took him, and he made amends by suggesting they should go for a
-walk in the park, and she often succeeded in leading him even to dry,
-uninteresting neighbours. But the burden grew heavier, and soon he could
-endure no longer the evenings of devotion to her in the drawing-room, where
-the presence of Mrs. Bentley seemed to fill her with incipient rebellion.
-One evening after dinner, as he was about to escape up-stairs, Emily took
-his arm, pleading that he should play at least one game of backgammon with
-her. He played three; and then, thinking he had done enough, he took up a
-novel and began to read. Emily was bitterly offended. She sat in a corner,
-a picture of deep misery; and whenever he spoke to Mrs. Bentley, he thought
-she would burst into tears. It was exasperating to be the perpetual victim
-of such folly; and, pressed by the desire to talk to Mrs. Bentley about the
-book he was reading, he suggested that she should come with him to the
-meet. The Harriers met for the first time that season at not five miles
-from Ashwood. Mrs. Bentley pleaded an engagement. She had promised to go
-over to tea at the rectory.
-
-'Oh, we shall be back in plenty of time; I'll leave you at the rectory on
-our way home.'
-
-'Thank you, Mr. Price; but I do not think I can go.'
-
-'And why, may I ask?'
-
-'Well, perhaps Emily would like to go.'
-
-'Emily has a cold, and it would be folly of her to venture a long drive on
-a cold morning.'
-
-'My cold is quite well.'
-
-'You were complaining before dinner how bad it was.'
-
-'If you don't want to take me, say so.' Tears were now streaming down her
-cheeks.
-
-'My dear Emily, I am only too pleased to have you with me; I was only
-thinking of your cold.'
-
-'My cold is quite gone,' she said, with brightening face; and next morning
-she came down with her waterproof on her arm, and she had on a new cloth
-dress which she had just received from London. Hubert recognised in each
-article of attire a sign that she was determined to carry her point. It
-seemed cruel to tell her to take her things off, and he glanced at Mrs.
-Bentley and wondered if she were offended.
-
-'I hope the drive won't tire you; you know the meet is at least five miles
-from here.'
-
-Emily did not answer. She looked charming with her great boa tied about her
-throat, and sprang into the dog-cart all lightness and joy.
-
-'I hope you are well wrapped up about the knees,' said Mrs. Bentley.
-
-'Oh yes, thank you; Hubert is looking after me.'
-
-Mrs. Bentley's calm, statuesque face, whereon no trace of envy appeared,
-caught Hubert's attention as he gathered up the reins, and he thought how
-her altruism contrasted with the passionate egotism of the young girl.
-
-'I hope Julia was not disappointed. I know she wanted to come; but----'
-
-'But what?'
-
-'Well, no one likes Julia more than I do, and I don't want to say anything
-against her; but, having lived so long with her, I see her faults better
-than you can. She is horribly selfish! It never occurs to her to think of
-me.'
-
-Hubert did not answer, and Emily looked at him inquiringly. At last she
-said, 'I suppose you don't think so?'
-
-'Well, Emily, since you ask me, I must say that I think she took it very
-good-humouredly. You said you were ill, and it was all arranged that I
-should drive her to the meet; then you suddenly interposed, and said you
-wanted to go; and the moment you mentioned your desire to go, she gave way
-without a word. I really don't know what more you want.'
-
-'You don't know Julia. You cannot read her face. She never forgets
-anything, and is storing it up, and will pay me out for it sooner or
-later.'
-
-'My dear Emily, how can you say such things? I never heard---- She is
-always ready to sacrifice herself for you.'
-
-'You think so. She has a knack of pretending to be more unselfish than
-another; but she is in reality intensely selfish.'
-
-'All I can say is that it does not strike me so. I never saw any one give
-way more good-humouredly than she did to-day.'
-
-'I don't think that that is so wonderful, after all. She is only a paid
-companion; and I do not see why she should go driving about the country
-with you, and I be left at home.'
-
-Hubert was somewhat shocked. The conversation paused.
-
-'She gets on very well with men,' Emily said at last, breaking an
-irritating silence somewhat suddenly. 'They say she is very good-looking.
-Don't you think so?'
-
-'Oh yes, she is certainly a pretty woman--or, I should say, a good-looking
-woman. She is too tall to be what one generally understands as a pretty
-woman.'
-
-'Do you like tall women?'
-
-At that moment the hunt appeared in the field at the bottom of the hill. A
-grey horse had just got rid of his rider, and after galloping round and
-round, his head in the air, stopped and began to graze. The others jumped
-the hedge, and the greater part of the field got over the brook in capital
-style. Emily and Hubert watched them with delighted eyes, for the sight was
-indeed picturesque this fine autumn day. Even their horse pricked up his
-ears and began neighing, and Hubert had to hold him tight in hand, lest he
-should break away while they were enjoying the spectacle. At that moment a
-poor little animal, with fear-haunted eyes, and in all the agony of
-fatigue, appeared above the crest of the hill, and immediately after came
-the straining hounds, one within a dozen yards of the poor little beast,
-now running in a circle, uttering the most plaintive and pitiful cries.
-
-'Oh, they are not going to kill it!' cried Emily. 'Oh, save it, save it,
-Hubert!' She hid her face in her hands. 'Did it escape? is it killed?' she
-said, looking round. 'Oh, it is too cruel!' The huntsman was calling to the
-hounds, holding something above them, and at every moment horses' heads
-appeared over the brow of the hill.
-
-There was more hunting; and when the October night began to gather, and the
-lurid sunset flared up in the west, Hubert got out another wrap, and placed
-it about Emily's shoulders. But although the chill night had drawn them
-close together in the dog-cart, they were as widely separated as if oceans
-were between them. So far as lay in his power he had hidden the annoyance
-that the intrusion of her society had occasioned him; and, to deceive her,
-very little concealment was necessary. So long as she saw him she seemed to
-live in a dream, unconscious of every other thought.
-
-They rolled through a gradual effacement of things, seeing the lights of
-the farmhouses in the long plain start into existence, and then remain
-fixed, like gold beetles pinned on a blue curtain. The chill evening drew
-her to him, till they seemed one; and full of the intimate happiness of the
-senses which comes of a long day spent in the open air, she chattered of
-indifferent things. He thought how pleasant the drive would be were he with
-Mrs. Bentley--or, for the matter of that, with any one with whom he could
-talk about the novel that had interested him. They rolled along the smooth
-wide road, watching the streak of light growing narrower in a veil of light
-grey cloud drawn athwart the sky. Overpowered by her love, the girl hardly
-noticed his silence; and when they passed through the night of an
-overhanging wood her flesh thrilled, and a little faintness came over her;
-for the leaves that brushed her face had seemed like a kiss from her lover.
-
-
-
-
-XV
-
-
-One afternoon, about the end of September, Hubert came down from his study
-about tea-time, and announced that he had written the last scene of his
-last act. Emily was alone in the drawing-room.
-
-'Oh, how glad I am! Then it is done at last. Why not write at once and
-engage the theatre? When shall we go to London?'
-
-'Well, I don't mean that the play could be put into rehearsal to-morrow. It
-still requires a good deal of overhauling. Besides, even if it were
-completely finished, I should not care to produce it at once. I should like
-to lay it aside for a couple of months, and see how it read then.'
-
-'What a lot of trouble you do take! Does every one who writes plays take so
-much trouble?'
-
-'No, I'm afraid they do not, nor is it necessary they should. Their plays
-are merely incidents strung together more or less loosely; whereas my play
-is the development of a temperament, of temperamental characteristics which
-cannot be altered, having been inherited through centuries; it must
-therefore pursue its course to a fatal conclusion. In Shakespeare---- But
-no, no! these things have no interest for you. You shall have the nicest
-dress that money can buy; and if the play succeeds----'
-
-The girl raised her pathetic eyes. In truth, she cared not at all what he
-talked to her about; she was occupied with her own thoughts of him, and
-just to sit in the room with him, and to look at him occasionally, was
-sufficient. But for once his words had pained her. It was because she could
-not understand that he did not care to talk to her. Why did she not
-understand? It was hard for a little girl like her to understand such
-things as he spoke about; but she would understand; and then her thoughts
-passed into words, and she said--
-
-'I understand quite as well as Julia. She, knows the names of more books
-than I, and she is very clever at pretending that she knows more than she
-does.'
-
-At that moment Mrs. Bentley entered. She saw that Emily was enjoying her
-talk with her cousin, and tried to withdraw. But Hubert told her that he
-had written the last act; she pretended to be looking for a book, and then
-for some work which she said had dropped out of her basket.
-
-'If Emily would only continue the talking,' she thought, 'I should be able
-to get away.' But Emily said not a word. She sat as if frozen in her chair;
-and at length Mrs. Bentley was obliged to enter, however cursorily, into
-the conversation.
-
-'If you have written out _The Gipsy_ from end to end, I should advise you
-to produce it without further delay. Once it is put on the stage, you will
-be able to see better where it is wrong.'
-
-'Then it will be too late. The critics will have expressed their opinion;
-the work will be judged. There are only one or two points about which I am
-doubtful. I wish Harding were here. I cannot work unless I have some one to
-talk to about my work. I don't mean to say that I take advice; but the very
-fact of reading an act to a sympathetic listener helps me. I wrote the
-first act of _Divorce_ in that way. It was all wrong. I had some vague
-ideas about how it might be mended. A friend came in; I told him my
-difficulties; in telling them they vanished, and I wrote an entirely new
-act that very night.'
-
-'I'm sorry,' said Mrs. Bentley, 'that I am not Mr. Harding. It must be very
-gratifying to one's feelings to be able to help to solve a literary
-difficulty, particularly if one cannot write oneself.'
-
-'But you can--I'm sure you can. I remember asking your advice once before;
-it was excellent, and was of immense help to me. Are you sure it will not
-bore you? I shall be so much obliged if you will.'
-
-'Bore me! No, it won't bore me,' said Mrs. Bentley. 'I'm sure I feel very
-much flattered.' The colour mounted to her cheek, a smile was on her lips;
-but it went out at the sight of Emily's face.
-
-'Then come up to my study. We shall have just time to get through the first
-act before dinner.'
-
-Mrs. Bentley hesitated; and, noticing her hesitation, Hubert looked
-surprised. At that moment Emily said--
-
-'May I not come too?'
-
-'Well, I don't know, Emily. You see that we wish to see if there is
-anything in the play that a young girl should not hear.'
-
-'Always an excuse to get rid of me. You want to be alone. I never come into
-the room that you do not stop speaking. Oh, I can bear it no longer!'
-
-'My dear Emily!'
-
-'Don't touch me! Go to her; shut yourself up together. Don't think of me. I
-can bear it no longer!' And she fled from the room, leaving behind her a
-sensation of alarm and pity. Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood looking at each
-other, both at a loss for words. At last he said--
-
-'That poor child will cry herself into her grave. Have you noticed how
-poorly she is looking?'
-
-'Not noticed! But you do not know half of it. It has been going on now a
-long time. You don't know half!'
-
-'I have noticed that things are not settling down as I hoped they would. It
-really has become quite dreadful to see that poor face looking
-reproachfully at you all day long. And I am quite at a loss to know what's
-the right thing to do.'
-
-'It is worse than you think. You have not noticed that we hardly speak
-now?'
-
-'You--who were such friends--surely not!'
-
-Then she told him hurriedly, in brief phrases, of the change that had taken
-place in Emily in the last three months. 'It was only the other night she
-accused me of going after you, of having designs upon you. It is very
-painful to have to tell you these things, but I have no choice in the
-matter. She lay on her bed crying, saying that every one hated her, that
-she was thoroughly miserable. Somehow she seems naturally an unhappy child.
-She was unhappy at home before she came here; but then I believe she had
-excellent reasons,--her mother was a very terrible person. However, all
-that is past; we have to consider the present now. She accused me of having
-designs on you, insisting all the while that every one was talking about
-it, and that she was fretting solely because of my good name. Of course, it
-is very ridiculous; but it is very pitiful, and will end badly if we don't
-take means to put a stop to it. I shouldn't be surprised if she went off
-her head. We ought to have the best medical advice.'
-
-'This is very serious,' he said. And then, at the end of a long silence, he
-said again, 'This is very serious--perhaps far more serious than we think.'
-
-'Not more serious than I think. I ought to have spoken about it to you
-before; but the subject is a delicate one. She hardly sleeps at all at
-night; she cries sometimes for hours; she works herself up into such fits
-of nervousness that she doesn't know what she is saying,--accuses me of
-killing her, and then repents, declaring that I am the only one who has
-ever cared for her, and begs of me not to leave her. I do assure you it is
-becoming very serious.'
-
-'Have you any proposal to make regarding her? I need hardly say that I'm
-ready to carry out any idea of yours.'
-
-'You know what the cause of it is, I suppose?'
-
-'I do not know; I am not certain. I daresay I'm mistaken.'
-
-'No, you are not; I wish you were--that is to say, unless---- But I was
-saying that it is most serious. The child's health is affected; she is
-working herself up into an awful state of mind; she is losing all
-self-control. I'm sure I'm the last person who would say anything against
-her; but the time has come to speak out. Well, the other day, when we were
-at the Eastwicks, you took the chair next to mine when she left the room.
-When she returned, she saw that you had changed your place, and she said to
-Ethel Eastwick, "Oh, I'm fainting. I cannot go in there; they are
-together." Ethel had to take her up to her room. Well, this morbid
-sensitiveness is most unhealthy. If I walk out on the terrace, she follows,
-thinking that I have made an appointment to meet you. Jealousy of me fills
-up her whole mind. I assure you that I am most seriously alarmed. Something
-occurs every day--trifles, no doubt; and in anybody else they would mean
-nothing, but in her they mean a great deal.'
-
-'But what do you propose?'
-
-'Unless you intend to marry her--forgive me for speaking so plain--there is
-only one thing to do. I must leave.'
-
-'No, no; you must not leave! She could not live alone with me. But does she
-want you to leave?'
-
-'No; that is the worst of it. I have proposed it; she will not hear of it;
-to mention the subject is to provoke a scene. She is afraid if I left that
-you would come and see me; and the very thought of my escaping her
-vigilance is intolerable.'
-
-'It is very strange.'
-
-'Yes, it is very strange; but, opposed though she be to all thoughts of it,
-I must leave.'
-
-'As a favour I ask you to stay. Do me this service, I beg of you. I have
-set my heart on finishing my play this autumn. If it isn't finished now, it
-never will be finished; and your leaving would create so much trouble that
-all thought of work would be out of the question. Emily could not remain
-alone here with me. I should have to find another companion for her; and
-you know how difficult that would be. I'm worried quite enough as it is.' A
-look of pain passed through his eyes, and Mrs. Bentley wondered what he he
-could mean. 'No,' he said, taking her hands, 'we are good friends--are we
-not? Do me this service. Stay with me until I finish this play; then, if
-things do not mend, go, if you like, but not now. Will you promise me?'
-
-'I promise.'
-
-'Thank you. I am deeply obliged to you.'
-
-At the end of a long silence, Hubert said, 'Will you not come up-stairs,
-and let me read you the first act?'
-
-'I should like to, but I think it better not. If Emily heard that you had
-read me your play, she would not close her eyes to-night; it would be tears
-and misery all the night through.'
-
-
-
-
-XVI
-
-
-The study in which he had determined to write his masterpiece had been
-fitted up with taste and care. The floor was covered with a rare Persian
-carpet, and the walls were lined with graceful bookcases of Chippendale
-design; the volumes, half morocco, calf, and the yellow paper of French
-novels, showed through the diamond panes. The writing-table stood in front
-of the window; like the bookcases, it was Chippendale, and on the dark
-mahogany the handsome silver inkstand seemed to invite literary
-composition. There was a scent of flowers in the room. Emily had filled a
-bowl of old china with some pale September roses. The curtains were made of
-a modern cretonne--their colour was similar to the bowl of roses; and the
-large couch on which Hubert lay was covered with the same material. On one
-wall there was a sea-piece by Courbet, and upon another a river landscape,
-with rosy-tinted evening sky, by Corot. The chimney-piece was set out with
-a large gilt timepiece, and candelabra in Dresden china. Hubert had bought
-these works of art on the occasion of his last visit to London, about two
-months ago.
-
-It was twelve o'clock. He had finished reading his second act, and the
-reading had been a bitter disappointment. The idea floated, pure and
-seductive, in his mind; but when he tried to reduce it to a precise shape
-upon paper, it seemed to escape in some vague, mysterious way. Enticingly,
-like a butterfly it fluttered before him; he followed like a child,
-eagerly--his brain set on the mazy flight. It led him through a country
-where all was promise of milk and honey. He followed, sure that the
-alluring spirit would soon choose a flower; then he would capture it. Often
-it seemed to settle. He approached with palpitating heart; but lo! when the
-net was withdrawn it was empty.
-
-A look of pain and perplexity came upon his face; he remembered the lodging
-at seven shillings a week in the Tottenham Court Road. He had suffered
-there; but it seemed to him that he was suffering more here. He had changed
-his surroundings, but he had not changed himself. Success and failure,
-despair and hope, joy and sorrow, lie within and not without us. His pain
-lay at his heart's root; he could not pluck it forth, and its gratification
-seemed more than ever impossible. He changed his position on the couch.
-Suddenly his thoughts said, 'Perhaps I am mistaken in the subject. Perhaps
-that is the reason. Perhaps there is no play to be extracted from it;
-perhaps it would be better to abandon it and choose another.' For a few
-seconds he scanned the literary horizon of his mind. 'No, no!' he said
-bitterly, 'this is the play I was born to write. No other subject is
-possible; I can think of nothing else. This is all I can feel or see.' It
-was the second act that now defied his efforts. It had once seemed clear
-and of exquisite proportions; now no second act seemed possible: the
-subject did not seem to admit of a second act; and, clasping his forehead
-with his hands, he strove to think it out.
-
-Any distraction from the haunting pain, now become chronic, is welcome, and
-he answers with a glad 'Come in!' the knock at the door.
-
-'I'm sorry,' said Mrs. Bentley, 'for disturbing you, but I should like to
-know what fish you would like for your dinner--soles, turbot, or whiting?
-Immersed in literary problems as you are, I daresay these details are very
-prosaic; but I notice that later in the day----'
-
-Hubert laughed. 'I find such details far more agreeable than literature. I
-can do nothing with my play.'
-
-'Aren't you getting on this morning?'
-
-'No, not very well.'
-
-'What do you think of turbot?'
-
-'I think turbot very nice. Emily likes turbot.'
-
-'Very well, then. I'll order turbot.'
-
-As Mrs. Bentley was about to withdraw, she said, 'I'm sorry you are not
-getting on. What stops you now? That second act?'
-
-'Come, you are not very busy. I'll read you the act as it stands, and then
-tell you how I think it ought to be altered. Nothing helps me so much as to
-talk it over; not only does it clear up my ideas, but it gives me desire to
-write. My best work has always been done in that way.'
-
-'I really don't think I can stay. If Emily heard that you had been reading
-your play to me----'
-
-'I'm tired of hearing of what Emily thinks. I can put up with a good deal,
-and I know that it is my duty to show much forbearance; but there is a
-limit to all things!' This was the first time Mrs. Bentley had seen him
-show either excitement or anger; she hardly knew him in this new aspect. In
-a moment the blonde calm of the Saxon had dropped from him, and some Celtic
-emphasis appeared in his speech. 'This hysterical girl,' he continued, 'is
-a sore burden. Tears about this, and sighs about that; fainting fits
-because I happen to take a chair next to yours. You may depend upon it our
-lives are already the constant gossip of the neighbourhood.'
-
-'I know it is very annoying; and I, I assure you, receive my share. Every
-look and word is misinterpreted. I must not stay here.'
-
-'You must not go! I really want you. I assure you that your opinion will be
-of value.'
-
-'But think of Emily. It will make her wretched if she hears of it. You do
-not know how it affects her. The slightest thing! You hardly see anything;
-I see it all.'
-
-'But there is no sense in it; it is pure madness. I'm writing a play,
-trying to work out a most difficult problem, and am in want of an audience,
-and I ask you if you will be kind enough to let me read you the act, and
-you cannot listen to it because--because--yes, that's just it--because!'
-
-'You do not know how she suffers. Let me go; spare her the pain.'
-
-'She is not the only one who suffers. Do you think that I don't suffer?
-I've set my heart--my very life is set on this play. I must get through
-with it; they are all waiting for it. My enemies say I cannot write it, but
-I shall if you will help me.'
-
-[Illustration: "Sometimes, in an exciting passage, the hands were
-clasped."]
-
-'Poor Emily's heart is equally broken. Her life is equally set----' Mrs.
-Bentley did not finish. Hubert just caught the words. Their significance
-struck him; he looked questioningly into Mrs. Bentley's eyes; then,
-pretending not to have understood, he begged her to remain. With the air of
-one who yields to a temptation, she came into the room. He felt strangely
-happy, and, drawing over an arm-chair for her, he threw himself on the
-couch. He noticed that she wore a loose white jacket, and once during the
-reading of the act he was conscious of a beautiful hand hanging over the
-rail of the chair. Sometimes, in an exciting passage, the hands were
-clasped. The black slippers and the slender black-stockinged ankles showed
-beneath the skirt; and when he raised his eyes from the manuscript, he saw
-the blonde face and hair, and the pale eyes were always fixed upon him. She
-listened with a keen and penetrating interest to his criticism of the act,
-agreeing with him generally, sometimes quietly contesting a point, and with
-some strange fascination drawing new and unexpected ideas from him; and in
-the intellectual warmth of her femininity his brain seemed to clear and his
-ideas took new shape.
-
-'Ah,' he said, after two hours' delightful talk, 'how much I'm indebted to
-you! At last I see my mistakes; in two days I shall have written the act.
-And he wrote rapidly for nearly two hours, reconstructing the opening
-scenes of his second act.' He then threw himself on the couch, smoked a
-cigar, and after half an hour's rest continued writing till dinner-time.
-
-When he came down-stairs, the thought of what he had been writing was still
-so vivid in him that he did not notice at once the silence of those with
-whom he was dining. He complimented Mrs. Bentley on the freshness of the
-turbot; she hardly answered; and then he became aware that something had
-gone wrong. What? Only one thing was possible. Emily had heard that Mrs.
-Bentley had been in his study. Looking from the woman to the girl, he saw
-that the latter had been weeping. She was still in a highly hysterical
-state, and might burst into tears and fly from the dinner-table at any
-moment. His face changed expression, and it was with difficulty that he
-restrained his temper. His life had been made up of a constant recurrence
-of these scenes, and he was wholly weary of them; and the thought of the
-absolute want of reason in the causeless jealousy, and the misery that
-these little bickerings made of his life, exasperated him beyond measure.
-The dinner proceeded in silence, and every slight remark was a presage of
-storm. Hubert hoped the girl would say nothing until the servant left the
-room, and with that view he never spoke a word except to ask the ladies
-what they would take to eat. These tactics might have succeeded if Mrs.
-Bentley had not unfortunately said that next week she intended to go to
-London for a couple of days. 'The Eastwicks are there now, and they've
-asked me to stay with them.'
-
-'I think I shall go up with you. I want to go to London,' said Emily.
-
-'It will be very nice if you'll come; but we cannot both stay with the
-Eastwicks; they have only one spare room.'
-
-'I suppose you'd like me to go to an hotel.'
-
-'My dear Emily, how can you think of such a thing? A young girl like you
-could not stay at an hotel alone. I shall be only too pleased if you will
-go to the Eastwicks; I will go to the hotel.'
-
-Emily's lip quivered, and in the irritating silence both Hubert and Mrs.
-Bentley saw that she was trying to overcome her passion. They fervently
-hoped she would succeed; for at that moment the servant was handing round
-the wine, and the time he took to accomplish this service seemed endless.
-He had filled the last glass, had handed round the dessert, and was
-preparing to leave the room when Emily said--
-
-'The hotel will suit you very well. You'll be free to see Hubert whenever
-you like.'
-
-Hubert looked up quickly, hoping Mrs. Bentley would not answer, but before
-he could make a sign she said--
-
-'What do you mean, Emily? I did not know that Hubert was going to London.'
-
-'You hardly expect me to believe that, do you?'
-
-The servant was still in the room; but no look of astonishment appeared on
-his face, and Hubert hoped he had not heard. An awful silence glowered upon
-the dinner-table. The moment the door closed Hubert said, turning angrily
-to Emily--
-
-'Really, I am quite surprised, Emily, that you should make such
-observations in the presence of servants! This has been going on quite long
-enough; you are making the house intolerable. I shall not be able to live
-here any longer.'
-
-Emily burst into a passionate flood of tears. She declared she was
-wretchedly miserable, and that she fully understood that Hubert had begun
-to regret that he had asked her to stay at Ashwood. Everything had been
-taken from her; every one was against her. Her sobs shook her frail little
-frame as if they would break it, and Hubert's heart was wrung at the sight
-of such genuine suffering.
-
-'My dear Emily, I assure you you are mistaken. We both love you very much.'
-He got up from his chair, and, putting his arm about her, besought her to
-dry her eyes; but she shook him passionately from her, and fled from the
-room.
-
-Three days after, Emily tore up one of her songs, because Mrs. Bentley had
-sung it without her leave. And so on and so on, week after week. No sooner
-was one quarrel allayed than signs of another began to appear. Hubert
-despaired. 'How is this to end?' he asked himself every day. Mrs. Bentley
-begged him to cancel her promise, and allow her to go. But that was
-impossible. He could not remain alone with Emily; if he left her she would
-not fail to believe that he had gone after her rival. The situation had
-become so tense that they ended by discussing these questions almost
-without reserve. To make matters worse, Emily had begun visibly to lose her
-health. There was neither colour in her cheeks nor light in her eyes; she
-hardly slept at all, and had grown more than ever like a little shadow. The
-doctor had been summoned, and, after prescribing a tonic, had advised quiet
-and avoidance of all excitement. Therefore Hubert and Mrs. Bentley agreed
-never to meet except when Emily was present, and then strove to speak as
-little as possible to each other. But the very fact of having to restrain
-themselves in looks, glances, and every slightest word--for Emily
-misinterpreted all things--whetted their appetites for each other's
-society.
-
-In the misery of his study, when he watched the sheet of paper, he often
-sought relief in remembrance of her sweet manner, and the happy morning he
-had spent in her companionship. What he had written under the direct
-influence of her inspiration still seemed to him to be less bad than the
-rest of his play; and he began to feel sure that, if ever this play were
-written, it would be written in the benign charm of her sweet
-encouragement, in the reposeful shadow of her presence. But that presence
-was forbidden him--that presence that seemed so necessary; and for what
-reason? Turning on the circumstances of his life, he raged against them,
-declaring that it would be folly to allow his very life's desire to be
-frittered away to gratify a young girl's caprice,--a caprice which in a few
-years she would laugh at. And whenever he was not thinking of his play, he
-remembered the charm of Mrs. Bentley's company, and the beneficent effect
-it had on his work. He had never known a woman he had liked so much, and he
-felt--he started at the thought, so like an inspiration did it seem to
-him--that the only possible solution of the present situation was his
-marriage with her. Once he was married, Emily would soon learn to forget
-him. They would take her up to London for the season; and, amid the healthy
-excitement of balls and parties, her girlish fancy would evaporate. No
-doubt she would meet again the young cavalry officer whose addresses she
-had received so coldly. She would be sure to meet him again--be sure to
-think him the most charming man in the world; they would marry, and she
-would make him the best possible wife. The kindest action they could do
-Emily would be to marry. There was nothing else to do, and they must do
-something, or else the girl would die. It seemed wonderful to Hubert that
-he had not thought of all this before. 'It is the very obvious solution of
-the problem,' he said; and his heart beat as he heard Mrs. Bentley's step
-in the corridor. It died away in the distance; but a few days after, when
-he heard it again, he jumped from his chair, and ran to the door. 'Come,'
-he said, 'I want to speak to you.'
-
-'No, no, I beg of you!'
-
-'I must speak to you!' He laid his hand upon her arm, and said, 'I beg of
-you. I have something to say--it is of great importance. Come in.'
-
-They looked at each other a moment, and it seemed as if they could see into
-each other's souls. Then a look of yielding passed into her eyes, and she
-said--
-
-'Well, what is it?'
-
-The familiarity of the words struck her, and she saw by the kindling
-tenderness in his eyes that they had given him pleasure. She almost knew he
-was going to tell her that he loved her. He looked towards the open door,
-and, guessing his intention, she said--
-
-'Don't shut it! Speak quickly. Remember that she may pass at any moment.
-Were she to find us together, she would suffer; it would be tears and
-reproaches. What you have to say to me is about her?'
-
-'Of course; we never speak of anything else. But we must not be overheard.
-I must shut the door.' She noticed a certain embarrassment in his manner.
-Suddenly relinquishing his intention to take her hands, he said--
-
-'This cannot go on; our lives are being made unbearable. You agree with
-me--do you not?'
-
-'Yes,' she said, with a curious inquiring look in her eyes. 'You had better
-let me leave. It is the only way out of the difficulty.'
-
-'You know very well, Julia, that that is impossible.'
-
-It was the first time he had used her Christian name, and she knew now he
-was going to ask her to marry him. A frightened look passed into her face;
-she turned from him; he took her hands.
-
-'No, Julia,' he said; 'there is another and better way out of the
-difficulty. You will stop here--you will be my wife?' Reading the look of
-pain that had come into her eyes, he said, 'You will not refuse me? I want
-you--I can do nothing without you. If you leave me, I shall never be able
-to write my play; it can only be written under your influence. I love you,
-Julia!' She allowed him to draw her towards him, and then she broke away.
-
-'Oh,' she said, 'why do you say these things? You only make my task harder.
-You know that I cannot betray my friend. Why do you tempt me to do a
-dishonourable action?'
-
-'A dishonourable action! What do you mean? It is the only way to save her.
-Once we are married, she will forget. No doubt she will shed a few tears;
-but to save the body we must often lose a limb. It is even so. Things
-cannot go on as they are. We cannot watch her withering away under our very
-eyes; and that is what is actually happening. I have thought it all over,
-considered it from every point of view, and have come to the conclusion
-that--that, well, that we had better marry. You must have seen that I
-always liked you. I did not myself know how much until a few days ago. Say
-that I am not wholly disagreeable to you.'
-
-'No; I will not listen to you! My conscience tells me plainly where my duty
-lies. Not for all the world will I play Emily false. I shudder to think of
-such a thing; it would be the basest ingratitude. I owe everything to her.
-When I hadn't a penny in the world, and when in my homelessness I wrote to
-Mr. Burnett, she pleaded in my favour, and decided him to take me as a
-companion. No, no! a thousand times no! Let go my hands. Do you not know
-what it is to be loyal?'
-
-'I hope I do. But, as I have explained, it is the only solution. The
-romantic attachments of young girls, unless nipped in the bud, often end
-fatally. Do you not see how ill she is looking? She is wearing her life
-away. We shall be acting in her best interests. Besides, she is not the
-only person to be considered. Do I not love you? Are you not the very woman
-whose influence, whose guidance, is necessary, so that I should succeed?
-Without your help I shall never write my play. A woman's influence is
-necessary to every undertaking. The greatest writers owe their best
-inspiration to----'
-
-'Her heart is as closely set upon you as yours is upon your play.'
-
-'But,' cried Hubert, 'I do not love her! Under no circumstances would I
-marry her. That I swear to you. If she and I were alone on a desert
-island----'
-
-Julia looked at him one moment doubtingly, inquiringly. Then she said--
-
-'Hers is no evanescent fancy, but a passion that goes to the very roots of
-her nature, and will kill her if it be not satisfied.'
-
-'Or cut out in time.'
-
-'I must leave.'
-
-'That will not mend matters.'
-
-'My departure will, at all events, remove all cause for jealousy; and when
-I am gone you may learn to love her.'
-
-'No; that I swear is impossible!'
-
-'You very likely think so now; but I'm bound to give her every chance of
-winning you.'
-
-'I say again that that is impossible! I have never seen a woman except
-yourself I could marry. I tell you so: believe me as you like.... In this
-matter you are acting like a woman,--you allow your emotions and not your
-intellect to lead you. By acting thus, you are certainly sacrificing two
-lives--hers and mine. Of your own I do not speak, not knowing what is
-passing in your heart; but if by any chance you should care for me, you are
-adding your own happiness to the general holocaust.' Neither spoke again
-for some time.
-
-'Why should you not marry her?' Julia said, at the end of a long silence.
-'Some people think her quite a pretty girl.'
-
-The lovers looked at each other and smiled sadly. And then, in pathetic
-phrases, Hubert tried to explain why he could never love Emily. He spoke of
-his age, and of difference of tastes,--he liked clever women. The
-conversation fell. At the end of a long silence, Julia said--
-
-'There is nothing for it but my departure, and the sooner the better.'
-
-'You are not in earnest? You are surely not in earnest?'
-
-'Yes, indeed I am.'
-
-'Then, if you go, you must take her with you. She cannot remain here alone
-with me. And even if she could, I could not live with her. Her folly has
-destroyed any liking I may have ever had for her. You'll have to take her
-with you.'
-
-'She would not come with me. I spoke to her once of a trip abroad.'
-
-'And she refused?'
-
-'She said she only wanted things to go on just as they are.'
-
-
-
-
-XVII
-
-
-In some trepidation Julia knocked. Receiving no reply, she opened the door,
-and her candle burnt in what a moment before must have been inky darkness.
-Emily lay on her bed--on the edge of it; and the only movement she made was
-to avert her eyes from the light. 'What! all alone in this darkness,
-Emily!... Shall I light your candles?' She had to repeat the question
-before she could get an answer.
-
-'No, thank you; I want nothing; I have no wish to see anything. I like the
-dark.'
-
-'Have you been asleep?'
-
-'No; I have not.... Why do you come to torment me? It cannot matter to you
-whether I lie in the dark or the light. Oh, take that candle away! it is
-blinding me.' Julia put the candle on the washstand. Then full of pity for
-the grieving girl, she stood, her hand resting on the bed-rail.
-
-'Aren't you coming down to dinner, Emily? Come, let me pour out some water
-for you. When you have bathed your eyes----'
-
-'I don't want any dinner.'
-
-'It will look very strange if you remain in your room the whole evening.
-You do not want to vex him, do you?'
-
-'I suppose he is very angry with me. But I did not mean to vex him. Is he
-very angry?'
-
-'No, he is not angry at all; he is merely distressed. You distress him
-dreadfully when----'
-
-'I don't know why I should distress him. I'm sure I don't mean to. You know
-more about it than I. You are always whispering together--talking about
-me.'
-
-'I assure you, Emily, you are mistaken. Mr. Price and I have no secrets
-whatever.'
-
-'Why should you tell me these falsehoods? They make me so miserable.'
-
-'Falsehoods, Emily! When did you ever know me to tell a falsehood?'
-
-'You say you have no secrets! Do you think I am blind? You think, I
-suppose, I did not see you showing him a ring? You took it off, too; and I
-suppose you gave it to him,--an engagement ring, very likely.'
-
-'I lost a stone from my ring, and I asked Mr. Price if he would take the
-ring to London and have the stone replaced.... That is all. So you see how
-your imagination has run away with you.'
-
-Emily did not answer. At last she said, breaking the silence abruptly--
-
-'Is he very angry? Has he gone to his study? Do you think he will come down
-to dinner?'
-
-'I suppose he'll come down for dinner.'
-
-'Will you go and ask him?'
-
-'I hardly see how I can do that. He is very busy.... And if you would
-listen to any advice of mine, it would be to leave him to himself as much
-as possible for the present. He is so taken up with his play; I know he's
-most anxious about it.'
-
-'Is he? I don't know. He never speaks to me about it. I hate that play, and
-I hate to see him go up to that study! I cannot understand why he should
-trouble himself about writing plays; he doesn't want the money, and it
-can't be agreeable sitting up there all alone thinking.... It is easy to
-see that it only makes him unhappy. But you encourage him to go on with it.
-Oh yes, you do; there's no use saying you don't. You are always talking to
-him about it; you bring the conversation up. You think I don't see how you
-do it, but I do; and you like doing it, because then you have him all to
-yourself. I can't talk to him about that play; and I wouldn't if I could,
-for it only makes him unhappy. But you don't care whether he's unhappy or
-not; you only think of yourself.'
-
-'You surely don't believe what you are saying is true? To-morrow you will
-be sorry for what you have said. You cannot think that I would deceive you,
-Emily? Remember what friends we have been.'
-
-'I remember everything. You think I don't; but I do. And you think also
-that there's no reason why I should be miserable; but there is. Because you
-do not feel my misery, you think it doesn't exist. I daresay you think,
-too, that you are very good and kind; but you aren't. You think you deceive
-me; but you don't. I know all that is passing between you and Hubert. I
-know a great deal more than I can explain....'
-
-'But tell me, Emily, what is it you suspect? What do you accuse me of?'
-
-'I accuse you of nothing. Can't you understand that things may go wrong
-without it being any one's fault in particular?'
-
-Julia wondered how Emily could think so wisely. She seemed to have grown
-wiser in her grief. But grief helped her no further in her instinctive
-perception of the truth, and she resumed her puerile attack on her friend.
-
-'Nothing has gone well with me ever since you came here. I was
-disinherited; and I daresay you were glad, for you knew that if the money
-did not come to me it would go to Hubert, and I do know----'
-
-'What are you saying, Emily? I never heard of such wild accusations before!
-You know very well that I never set eyes on Mr. Price until he came down
-here.'
-
-'How should I know what you know or don't know? But I know that all my life
-every one has been plotting against me. And I cannot make out why. I never
-did harm to any one.'
-
-The conversation paused. Emily flung herself back on the pillow. Not even a
-sob. The candle burned like a long yellow star in the shadows, yielding
-only sufficient light for Julia to see the outlines of a somewhat untidy
-room,--an old-fashioned mahogany wardrobe, cloudy and black, upon
-old-fashioned grey paper, some cardboard boxes, and a number of china
-ornaments, set out on a small table covered with a tablecloth in
-crewel-work.
-
-'I would do anything in the world for you, Emily. I am your best friend,
-and yet----'
-
-'I have no friend. I don't believe in friends. You think people are your
-friends, and then you find they are not.'
-
-'How can I convince you of the injustice of your suspicions?'
-
-'I see all plainly enough; it is fate, I suppose.... Selfishness. We all
-think of ourselves--we can't help it; and that's what makes life so
-miserable.... He would be a very good match. You have got him to like you.
-Perhaps you didn't intend to; but you have done it all the same.'
-
-'But, Emily dear, listen! There is no question of marriage between me and
-Mr. Price. If you will only have patience, things will come right in the
-end.'
-
-'For you, perhaps.'
-
-'Emily, Emily! ... You should try to understand things better.'
-
-'I feel them, even if I don't understand.'
-
-'Admit that you were wrong about the ring. Have I not convinced you that
-you were wrong?'
-
-Emily did not answer. But at the end of a long silence, in which she had
-been pursuing a different train of thought, she said, 'Then you mean that
-he has never asked you to marry him?'
-
-The directness of the question took Julia by surprise, and, falsehood being
-unnatural to her, she hesitated, hardly knowing what to answer. Her
-hesitation was only momentary; but in that moment there came up such a wave
-of pity for the grief-stricken girl that she lied for pity's sake, 'No, he
-never asked me to marry him. I assure you that he never did. If you do not
-believe me----' As she was about to say, 'I will swear it if you like,' an
-irresponsible sensation of pride in her ownership of his love surged up
-through her, overwhelming her will, and she ended the sentence, 'I am very
-sorry, but I cannot help it.'
-
-The words were still well enough; it was in the accent that the truth
-transpired. And then yielding still further to the force which had
-subjugated her will, she said--
-
-'I admit that we have talked about a great many things.' (Again she strove
-not to speak, but the words rose red-hot to her lips.) 'He has said that he
-would like to marry, but I should not think of accepting----'
-
-'Then it is just as I thought!' Emily cried; 'he wants to get rid of me!'
-
-Julia was shocked and surprised at the depth of disgraceful vanity and
-cowardice which special circumstances had brought within her consciousness.
-The Julia Bentley of the last few moments was not the Julia Bentley she was
-accustomed to meet and interrogate, and she asked herself how she might
-exorcise the meanness that had so unexpectedly appeared in her. Should she
-pile falsehood on falsehood? She felt it would be cruel not to do so; but
-Emily said, 'He wants to marry to get rid of me, and not because he loves
-you.' Then it was hard to deny herself the pleasure of telling the whole
-truth; but she mastered her desire of triumph, and, actuated by nothing but
-sincerest love and pity, she said--
-
-'Oh, Emily dear, he never asked me to marry him; he does not love me at
-all! Why will you not believe me?'
-
-'Because I cannot!' she cried passionately. 'I only ask to be left alone.'
-
-'A little patience, Emily, and all will come right. Mr. Price does not want
-to get rid of you. You wrong him just as you wrong me. He has often said
-how much he likes you; indeed he has.' Although speaking from the bottom of
-her heart, it seemed to Julia that she was playing the part of a cruel,
-false woman, who was designingly plotting to betray a helpless girl; and
-not understanding why this was so, she was at once puzzled and confused. It
-seemed to her that she was being borne on in a wind of destiny, and her
-will seemed to beat vainly against it, like a bird's wings when a storm is
-blowing. She was conscious of a curious powerlessness; it surprised her,
-and she could not understand why she continued talking, so vain and useless
-did words seem to her--an idle patter. She continued--
-
-'You think that I stand between you and Mr. Price. Now, I assure you that
-it is not so. I tell you I should refuse Mr. Price, even if he were to ask
-me to marry him, here, at this very moment. I pledge you my word on this.
-Give me your hand, Emily. You will not refuse it?' Emily gave her hand. 'It
-is quite ridiculous to promise, for he will never ask me; but I promise not
-to marry him even if he should ask me.' She gave the promise, determined to
-keep it; and yet she knew she would not keep it. She argued passionately
-with herself, a prey to an inward dread; for no matter how firmly she
-forced resolution upon resolution, they all seemed to melt in her soul like
-snow on a blazing fire. Then, determined to rid herself of a numb sensation
-of powerlessness, and achieve the end she desired, she said, 'I'll tell
-you, Emily, what I'll do. I'll not stay here; I will go away. Let me go
-away, dear, and then it will be all right.'
-
-'No, no! you mustn't leave; I don't want you to leave. It would be said
-everywhere that I had you sent away.... You promise me not to leave?'
-Raising herself, Emily clung to Julia's arm, detaining her until she had
-extorted the desired promise.
-
-'Very well; I promise,' she said sadly. 'But I think you are wrong; indeed
-I do. I have always thought that "the only solution of the problem" was my
-departure.' Memory had betrayed her into Hubert's own phrase.
-
-'Why should you go? You think, I suppose, that I'm in love with Hubert? I'm
-not. All I want is for things to go on just the same--for us to be friends
-as we were before.'
-
-'Very well, Emily--very well.... But in the meantime you must not neglect
-your meals as you have been doing lately. If you don't take care, you'll
-lose your health and your looks. I have been noticing how thin you are
-looking.'
-
-'I suppose you have told him that I am looking thin and ill.... Men like
-tall, big, healthy women like you--don't they?'
-
-'I see, Emily, that it is hopeless; every word one utters is
-misinterpreted. Dinner will be ready in a few minutes; or, if you like, I
-will dine up-stairs; and you and Mr. Price----'
-
-'But is he coming down to dinner? I thought you said he had gone to his
-study; sometimes he dines there.'
-
-'I can tell you nothing about Mr. Price. I don't know whether he'll dine
-up-stairs or down.'
-
-At that moment a knock was heard at the door, and the servant announced
-that dinner was ready. 'Mr. Price has sent down word, ma'am, that he is
-very busy writing; he hopes you'll excuse him, and he'll be glad if you
-will send him his dinner up on a tray.'
-
-'Very well; I shall be down directly.'
-
-The slight interruption had sufficed to calm Julia's irritation, and she
-stood waiting for Emily. But seeing that she showed no signs of moving, she
-said, 'Aren't you coming down to dinner, Emily?' It was a sense of strict
-duty that impelled the question, for her heart sank at the prospect of
-spending the evening alone with the girl. But seeing the tears on Emily's
-cheeks, she sat down beside her, and said, 'Dearest Emily, if you would
-only confide in me!'
-
-'There's nothing to confide....'
-
-'You mustn't give way like this; you really mustn't. Come down and have
-some dinner.'
-
-'It is no use; I couldn't eat anything.'
-
-'He may come into the drawing-room in the course of the evening, and will
-be so disappointed and grieved to hear that you have not been down.'
-
-'No; he will spend the whole evening in his room; we shall not see him
-again.'
-
-'But if I go and ask him to come; if I tell him----'
-
-'No; do not speak to him about me; he'd only say that I was interfering
-with his work.'
-
-'That is unjust, Emily; he has never reproached you with interfering with
-his work. Shall I go and tell him that you won't come down because you
-think he is angry with you?'
-
-Ten minutes passed, and no answer could be obtained from Emily--only
-passionate and illusive refusals, denials, prayer to be left alone; and
-these mingled with irritating suggestions that Julia had better go at once,
-that Hubert might be waiting for her. But Julia bore patiently with her and
-did not leave her until Hubert sent to know why his dinner was delayed.
-
-Emily had begun to undress; and, tearing off her things, she hardly took
-more than five minutes to get into bed.
-
-'Shall I light a candle?' Julia asked before leaving.
-
-'No, thank you.'
-
-'Shall I send you up some soup?'
-
-'No; I could not touch it.'
-
-'You are not going to remain in the dark? Let me light a night-light?'
-
-'No, thank you; I like the dark.'
-
-
-
-
-XVIII
-
-
-Hubert and Mrs. Bentley stood by the chimney-piece in the drawing-room,
-waiting for the doctor; they had left him with Emily, and stood facing each
-other absorbed in thought, when the door opened, and the doctor entered.
-Hubert said--
-
-'What do you think, Doctor? Is she seriously ill?'
-
-'There is nothing, so far as I can make out, organically the matter with
-her, but the system is running down. She is very thin and weak. I shall
-prescribe a tonic, but----'
-
-'But what, doctor?'
-
-'She seems to be suffering from extreme depression of spirits. Do you know
-of any secret grief--any love affair? At her age, anything of that sort
-fills the entire mind, and the consequences are often grave.'
-
-'And supposing it were so, what would be your advice? Change of air and
-scene?'
-
-'Certainly.'
-
-'Have you spoken to her on the subject?'
-
-'Yes; but she says she will not leave Ashwood.'
-
-'We cannot send her away by force. What would you advise us to do?'
-
-'There's nothing to be done. We must hope for the best. There is no
-immediate cause for fear.... But, by the way, she looks as if she suffered
-from sleeplessness.'
-
-'Yes, she does; but she has been ordered chloral. Any harm in that?'
-
-'In her case, it is a necessity; but do you think she takes it?'
-
-'Oh yes, she has been taking choral.'
-
-The conversation paused; the doctor went over to the writing-table, wrote a
-prescription, made a few remarks, and took his leave, announcing his
-intention of returning that day fortnight.
-
-Hubert said, and his tone implied reference to some anterior conversation,
-'We are powerless in this matter. You see we can do nothing. We only
-succeed in making ourselves unhappy; we do not change in anything. I am
-wretchedly unhappy!'
-
-'Believe me,' she said, raising her arms in a beautiful feminine movement,
-'I do not wish to make you unhappy.'
-
-'Then why do you persist? Why do you refuse to take the only step that may
-lead us out of this difficulty?'
-
-'How can you ask me? Oh, Hubert, I did not think you could be so cruel! It
-would be a shameful action.'
-
-It was the first time she had used his Christian name, and his face changed
-expression.
-
-'I cannot,' she said, 'and I will not, and I do not understand how you can
-ask me--you who are so loyal, how can you ask me to be disloyal?'
-
-'Spare me your reproaches. Fate has been cruel. I have never told you the
-story of my life. I have suffered deeply; my pride has been humiliated, and
-I have endured hunger and cold; but those sufferings were light compared to
-this last misfortune.'
-
-She looked at him with sublime pity in her eyes. 'I do not conceal from
-you,' she said, 'that I love you very much. I, too, have suffered, and I
-had thought for one moment that fate had vouchsafed me happiness; but, as
-you would say--the irony of life.'
-
-'Julia, do not say you never will?'
-
-'We cannot look into the future. But this I can say--I will not do Emily
-any wrong, and so far as is in my power I will avoid giving her pain. There
-is only one way out of this difficulty. I must leave this house as soon as
-I can persuade her to let me go.'
-
-The door opened; involuntarily the speakers moved apart; and though their
-faces and attitudes were strictly composed when Emily entered, she knew
-they had been standing closer together.
-
-'I'm afraid I'm interrupting you,' she said.
-
-'No, Emily; pray do not go away. We were only talking about you.'
-
-'If I were to leave every time you begin to talk about me, I should spend
-my life in my room. I daresay you have many faults to find. Let me hear all
-about your fresh discoveries.'
-
-It was a thin November day: leaves were whirling on the lawn, and at that
-moment one blew rustling down the window-pane. And, even as it, she seemed
-a passing thing. Her face was like a plate of fine white porcelain, and the
-deep eyes filled it with a strange and magnetic pathos; the abundant
-chestnut hair hung in the precarious support of a thin tortoiseshell; and
-there was something unforgetable in the manner in which her aversion for
-the elder woman betrayed itself--a mere nothing, and yet more impressive
-than any more obvious and therefore more vulgar expression of dislike would
-have been.
-
-'A little patience, Emily. You will not have me here much longer.'
-
-'I suppose that I am so disagreeable that you cannot live with me. Why
-should you go away?'
-
-'My dear Emily, you must not excite yourself. The doctor----'
-
-'I want to know why she said she was going to leave. Has she been
-complaining about me to you? What is her reason for wanting to go?'
-
-'We do not get on together as we used to--that is all, Emily. I can please
-you no longer.'
-
-'It is not my fault if we do not get on. I don't see why we shouldn't, and
-I do not want you to go.'
-
-'Emily, dear, everything shall be as you like it.'
-
-The girl looked at him with the shy, doubting look of an animal that would
-like, and still does not dare, to go to the beckoning hand. How frail
-seemed the body in the black dress! and how thin the arms in the black
-sleeves! Hubert took the little hand in his. At his touch a look of content
-and rest passed into her eyes, and she yielded herself as the leaf yields
-to the wind. She was all his when he chose. Mrs. Bentley left the room;
-and, seeing her go, a light of sudden joy illuminated the thin, pale face;
-and when the door closed, and she was alone with him, the bleak, unhappy
-look, which had lately grown strangely habitual to her, faded out of her
-face and eyes. He fetched her shawl, and took her hand again in his,
-knowing that by so doing he made her happy. He could not refuse her the
-peace from pain that these attentions brought her, though he would have
-held himself aloof from all women but one. She knew the truth well enough;
-but they who suffer much think only of the cessation of pain. He wondered
-at the inveigling content that introduced itself into her voice, face, and
-gesture. Settling herself comfortably on the sofa, she said--
-
-'Now tell me what the doctor said. Did he say I would soon recover? Did he
-say that I was very bad? Tell me all.'
-
-'He said that you ought to have a change--that you should go south
-somewhere.'
-
-'And you agree with him that I ought to go away?'
-
-'Is he not the best judge?--the doctor's orders!'
-
-'Then you, too, have learnt to hate me. You, too, want to send me away?'
-
-'My dear Emily, I only want to do as you like. You asked me what the doctor
-said, and I told you.'
-
-Hubert got up and walked aside. He passed his hand across his eyes. He
-could hardly contain himself; the emotion that discussion with this sick
-girl caused him went to his head. She looked at him curiously, watching his
-movement, and he failed to understand what pleasure it could give her to
-have him by her side, knowing, as she clearly did, that his heart was
-elsewhere. Turning suddenly, he said--
-
-'But tell me, Emily, how are you feeling? You are, after all, the best
-judge.'
-
-'I feel rather weak. I should get strong enough if----'
-
-She paused, as if waiting for Hubert to ask her to finish the sentence. But
-he hurriedly turned the conversation.
-
-'The doctor said you looked as if you had not had any sleep for several
-nights. I told him that that was strange, for you were taking chloral.'
-
-'I sleep well enough,' she said. 'But sometimes life seems so sad, that I
-do not think I shall be able to bear with it any longer. You do not know
-how unfortunate I have been. When I was a child, father and mother used to
-quarrel always, and I was the only child. That was why Mr. Burnett asked me
-to come and live at Ashwood. I came at first on a visit; and when father
-and mother died, he said he wished to adopt me. I thought he loved me; but
-his love was only selfishness. No one has ever loved me. I feel so utterly
-alone in this world--that is why I am unhappy.'
-
-Her eyes filled with tears, and at the sight of her tears Hubert's feelings
-were overwrought, and again he had to walk aside. He would give her all
-things; but she was dying for him, and he could not save her. No longer was
-there any disguisement between them. The words they uttered were as
-nothing, so clearly did the thought shine out of their eyes, 'I am dying of
-love for you,' and then the answer, 'I know that is so, and I cannot help
-it.' Her whole soul was spoken in her eyes, and he felt that his eyes
-betrayed him equally plainly. They stood in a sort of mental nakedness. The
-woman no longer sought for words to cover herself with; the man did, but he
-did not find them. They had not spoken for some time; they had been
-thinking of each other. At last she said, and with the querulous perversity
-of the sick---
-
-'But even if I wished to go abroad, with whom could I go?'
-
-Hubert fell into the trap, and, noticing the sudden brightness in his eyes,
-a cloud of disappointment shadowed hers. 'Of course, with Mrs. Bentley. I
-assure you, my dear Emily, that you----'
-
-'No, no, I am not mistaken! She hates me, and I cannot bear her. It is she
-who is making me ill.'
-
-'Hate you! Why should she hate you?'
-
-Emily did not reply. Hubert watched her, noticing the pallor of her cheek,
-so entirely white and blue, hardly a touch of warm colour anywhere, even in
-the shadow of the heavy hair.
-
-'I would give anything to see you friends again.'
-
-'That is impossible! I can never be friends with Julia as I once was. She
-has---- No, never can we be friends again. But why do you always take her
-part against me? That is what grieves me most. If only you thought----'
-
-'Emily dear, these are but idle fancies. You are mistaken.'
-
-The conversation fell. The girl lay quite still, her hands clasped across
-the shawl, her little foot stretched beyond the limp black dress, the hem
-of which fell over the edge of the grey sofa. Hubert sat by her on a low
-chair, and he looked into the fire, whose light wavered over the walls, now
-and again bringing the face of one of the pictures out of the darkness. The
-wind whined about the windows. Then, speaking as if out of a dream, Emily
-said--
-
-'Julia and I can never be friends again--that is impossible.'
-
-'But what has she done?' Hubert asked incautiously, regretting his words as
-soon as he had uttered them.
-
-'What has she done?' she said, looking at him curiously. 'Well, one thing,
-she has got it reported that--that I am in love with you, and that that is
-the reason of my illness.'
-
-'I am sure she never said any such thing. You are entirely mistaken. Mrs.
-Bentley is incapable of such wickedness.'
-
-'A woman, when she is jealous, will say anything. If she did not say it,
-can you tell me how it got about?'
-
-'I don't believe any one ever said such a thing.'
-
-'Oh yes, lots have said so--things come back to me. Julia always was
-jealous of me. She cannot bear me to speak to you. Have you not noticed how
-she follows us? Do you think she would have left the room just now if she
-could have helped it?'
-
-'If you think this is so, had she not better leave?'
-
-Emily did not answer at once. Motionless she lay on the sofa, looking at
-the grey November day with vague eyes that bespoke an obsession of
-hallucination. Suddenly she said, 'I do not want her to go away. She would
-spread a report that I was jealous of her, and had asked you to send her
-away. No; it would not be wise to send her away. Besides,' she said, fixing
-her eyes, now full of melancholy reproach, 'you would like her to remain.'
-
-'I have said before, Emily, and I assure you I am speaking the truth, I
-want you to do what you like. Say what you wish to be done, and it shall be
-done.'
-
-'Is that really true? I thought no one cared for me. You must care for me a
-little to speak like that.'
-
-'Of course I care for you, Emily.'
-
-'I sometimes think you might have if it had not been for that play; for, of
-course, I'm not clever, and cannot discuss it with you.... Julia, I
-suppose, can--that is the reason why you like her. Am I not right?'
-
-'Mrs. Bentley is a clever woman, who has read a great deal, and I like to
-talk an act over with her before I write it.'
-
-'Is that all? Then why do people say you are going to marry her?'
-
-'But nobody ever said so.'
-
-'Oh yes, they have. Is it true?'
-
-'No, Emily; it is not true.'
-
-'Are you quite sure?'
-
-'Yes, quite sure.'
-
-'If that is so,' she said, turning her eyes on Hubert, and looking as if
-she could see right down into his soul, 'I shall get well very soon. Then
-we can go on just the same; but if you married her, I----'
-
-'I what?'
-
-'Nothing! I feel quite happy now. I did not want you to marry her. I could
-not bear it. It would be like having a step-mother--worse, for she would
-not have me here at all; she would drive me away.'
-
-Hubert shook his head.
-
-'You don't know Julia as well as I do. However, it is no use discussing
-what is not going to be. You have been very nice to-day. If you would be
-always nice, as you are to-day, I should soon get well.'
-
-Her pale profile seemed very sharp in the fading twilight, and her delicate
-arms and thin bosom were full of the charm and fascination of deciduous
-things. She turned her face and looked at Hubert. 'You have made me very
-happy. I am content.'
-
-He was afraid to look back at her, lest she should, in her subtle, wilful
-manner, read the thought that was passing in his soul. Even now she seemed
-to read it. She seemed conscious of his pity for her. So little would give
-her happiness, and that little was impossible. His heart was irreparably
-another's. But though Emily's eyes seemed to know all, they seemed to say,
-'What matter? I regret nothing, only let things remain as they are.' And
-then her voice said--
-
-'I think I could sleep a little; happiness has brought me sleep. Don't go
-away. I shall not be asleep long.' She looked at him, and dozed, and then
-fell asleep. Hubert waited till her breathing grew deeper; then he laid the
-hand he held in his by her side, and stole on tiptoe from the room.
-
-The strain of the interview had become too intense; the house was
-unbearable. He went into the air. The November sky was drawing into wintry
-night; the grey clouds darkened, clinging round the long plain,
-overshadowing it, blotting out colour, leaving nothing but the severe green
-of the park, and the yellow whirling of dishevelled woods.
-
-'I must,' he said to himself, 'think no more about it. I shall go mad if I
-do. Nature will find her own solution. God grant that it may be a merciful
-one! I can do nothing.' And to escape from useless consideration, to
-release his overwrought brain, he hastened his steps, extending his walk
-through the farthest woods. As he approached the lodge gate he came upon
-Mrs. Bentley. She stood, her back turned from him, leaning on the gate, her
-thoughts lost in the long darkness of autumnal fields and woods.
-
-'Julia!'
-
-'You have left Emily. How did you leave her?'
-
-'She is fast asleep on the sofa. She fell asleep. Then why should I remain?
-The house was unbearable. She went to sleep, saying she felt very happy.'
-
-'Really! What induced such a change in her? Did you----'
-
-'No; I did not ask her to marry me; but I was able to tell her that I was
-not going to marry you, and that seemed entirely to satisfy her.'
-
-'Did she ask you?'
-
-'Yes. And when I told her I was not, she said that that was all she wanted
-to know--that she would soon get well now. How we human beings thrive in
-each other's unhappiness!'
-
-'Quite true, and we have been reproaching ourselves for our selfishness.'
-
-'Yes, and hers is infinitely greater. She is quite satisfied not to be
-happy herself, so long as she can make sure of our unhappiness. And what is
-so strange is her utter unconsciousness of her own fantastic and hardly
-conceivable selfishness.... It is astonishing!'
-
-'She is very young, and the young are naturally egotistic.'
-
-'Possibly. Still, it is hardly more agreeable to encounter. Come, let's go
-for a walk; and, above all things, let's talk no more about Emily.'
-
-The roads were greasy, and the hedges were torn and worn with incipient
-winter, and when they dipped the town appeared, a reddish-brown mass in the
-blue landscape. Hubert thought of his play and his love; but not
-separately--they seemed to him now as one indissoluble, indivisible thing;
-and he told her that he never would be able to write it without her
-assistance. That she might be of use to him in his work was singularly
-sweet to hear, and the thought reached to the end of her heart, causing her
-to smile sadly, and argue vainly, and him to reply querulously. They walked
-for about a mile; and then, wearied with sad expostulation, the
-conversation fell, and at the end of a long silence Julia said--
-
-'I think we had better turn back.'
-
-The suggestion filled Hubert's heart with rushing pain, and he answered--
-
-'Why should we return? I cannot go back to that girl. Oh, the miserable
-life we are leading!'
-
-'What can we do? We must go back; we cannot live in a tent by the wayside.
-We have no tent to set up.'
-
-'Come to London, and be my wife.'
-
-'No,' she said; 'that is impossible. Let us not speak of it.'
-
-Hubert did not answer; and, turning their faces homeward, they walked some
-way in silence. Suddenly Hubert said--
-
-'No; it is impossible. I cannot return. There is no use. I'm at the end of
-my tether. I cannot.'
-
-She looked at him in alarm.
-
-'Hubert,' she said, 'this is folly! I cannot return without you.'
-
-'You ruin my life; you refuse me the only happiness. I'm more wretched than
-I can tell you!'
-
-'And I! Do you think that I'm not wretched?' She raised her face to his;
-her eyes were full of tears. He caught her in his arms, and kissed her. The
-warm touch of her lips, the scent of her face and hair, banished all but
-desire of her.
-
-'You must come with me, Julia. I shall go mad if you don't. I can care for
-no one but you. All my life is in you now. You know I cannot love that
-girl, and we cannot continue in this wretched life. There is no sense in
-it; it is a voluntary, senseless martyrdom!'
-
-'Hubert, do not tempt me to be disloyal to my friend. It is cruel of you,
-for you know I love you. But no, nothing shall tempt me. How can I? We do
-not know what might happen. The shock might kill her. She might do away
-with herself.'
-
-'You must come with me,' said Hubert, now completely lost in his passion.
-'Nothing will happen. Girls do not do away with themselves; girls do not
-die of broken hearts. Nothing happens in these days. A few more tears will
-be shed, and she will soon become reconciled to what cannot be altered. A
-year or so after, we will marry her to a nice young man, and she will
-settle down a quiet mother of children.'
-
-'Perhaps you are right.'
-
-An empty fly, returning to the town, passed them. The fly-man raised his
-whip.
-
-'Take you to the railway station in ten minutes!'
-
-Hubert spoke quietly; nevertheless there was a strange nervousness in his
-eyes when he said--
-
-'Fate comes to help me; she offers us the means of escape. You will not
-refuse, Julia?'
-
-Her upraised face was full of doubt and pain, and she was perplexed by the
-fly-man's dull eyes, his starved horse, his ramshackle vehicle, the wet
-road, the leaden sky. It was one of those moments when the familiar appears
-strange and grotesque. Then, gathering all her resolution, she said--
-
-'No, no; it is impossible! Come back, come back.'
-
-He caught her arm: quietly and firmly he led her across the road. 'You must
-listen to me.... We are about to take a decisive step. Are you sure
-that----'
-
-'No, no, Hubert, I cannot; let us return home.'
-
-'I go back to Ashwood! If I did, I should commit suicide.'
-
-'Don't speak like that.... Where will you go?'
-
-'I shall travel.... I shall visit Italy and Greece.... I shall live
-abroad.'
-
-'You are not serious?'
-
-'Yes, I am, Julia. That cab may not take both, but it certainly will take
-one of us away from Ashwood, and for ever.'
-
-'Take you to Southwater, sir--take you to the station in ten minutes,' said
-the fly-man, pulling in his horse. A zig-zag fugitive thought passed: why
-did the fly-man speak of taking them to the station? How was it that he
-knew where they wanted to go? They stopped and wondered. The poor horse's
-bones stood out in strange projections, the round-shouldered little fly-man
-sat grinning on his box, showing three long yellow fangs. The vehicle, the
-horse, and the man, his arm raised in questioning gesture, appeared in
-strange silhouette upon the grey clouds, assuming portentous aspect in
-their tremulous and excited imaginations. 'Take you to Southwater in ten
-minutes!' The voice of the fly-man sounded hard, grating, and derisive in
-their ears.
-
-He had stopped in the middle of the road, and they walked slowly past,
-through a great puddle, which drenched their feet.
-
-'Get in, Julia. Shall I open the door?'
-
-'No, no; think of Emily. I cannot, Hubert,--I cannot; it would kill her.'
-
-The conversation paused, and in a long silence they wondered if the fly-man
-had heard. Then they walked several yards listening to the tramp of the
-hoofs, and then they heard the fly-man strike his horse with the whip. The
-animal shuffled into a sort of trot, and as the carriage passed them the
-fly-man again raised his arm and again repeated the same phrase, 'Drive you
-to the station in ten minutes!' The carriage was her temptation, and Julia
-hoped the man would linger no longer. For the promise she had given to
-Emily lay like a red-hot coal upon her heart; its fumes rose to her head,
-and there were times when she thought they would choke her, and she grew so
-sick with the pain of self-denial that she could have thrown herself down
-in the wet grass on the roadside, and laid her face on the cold earth for
-relief. Would nothing happen? What madness! Night was coming on, and still
-they followed the road to Southwater. Rain fell in heavy drops.
-
-'We shall get wet,' she murmured, as if she were answering the fly-man, who
-had said again, 'Drive you to the station in ten minutes!' She hated the
-man for his persistency.
-
-'Say you will come with me!' Hubert whispered; and all the while the rain
-came down heavier.
-
-'No, no, Hubert.... I cannot; I promised Emily that I never would. I am
-going back.'
-
-'Then we must say good-bye. I will not go back.'
-
-'You don't mean it. You don't really intend me to go back to Emily and tell
-her?... She will not believe me; she will think I have sent you away to
-gain my own end. Hubert, you mustn't leave me ... and in all this wet. See
-how it rains! I shall never be able to get home alone.'
-
-'I will drive you on as far as the lodge-gate; farther than the lodge I
-will not go. Nothing in the world shall tempt me to pass it.'
-
-At a sign from Hubert the little fly-man scrambled down from his box. He
-was a little old man, almost hunchbacked, with small mud-coloured eyes and
-a fringe of white beard about his sallow, discoloured face. He was dressed
-in a pale yellow jacket and waistcoat, and they both noticed that his
-crooked little legs were covered with a pair of pepper-and-salt trousers.
-They felt sure he must have overheard a large part of their conversation,
-for as he opened the carriage door he grinned, showing his three yellow
-fangs.... His appearance was not encouraging. Julia wished he were
-different, and then she looked at Hubert. She longed to throw herself into
-his arms and weep. But at that moment the heavens seemed to open, and the
-rain came down like a torrent, thick and fast, splashing all along the road
-in a million splashes.
-
-'Horrible weather, sir; shan't be long a-takin' you to Southwater. What
-part of the town be yer going to--the railway station?'
-
-Julia still hesitated. The rain beat on their faces, and when some chilling
-drops rolled down her neck she instinctively sought shelter in the
-carriage.
-
-'Drive me to the station as fast as you can. Catch the half-past five to
-London, and I'll give you five shillings.'
-
-The leather thong sounded on the starved animal's hide, the crazy vehicle
-rocked from side to side, and the wet country almost disappeared in the
-darkness. Hedges and fields swept past them in faintest outline, here and
-there a blurred mass, which they recognised as a farm building. His arm was
-about her, and she heard him murmur over and over again--
-
-'Dearest Julia, you are what I love best in the world.'
-
-The words thrilled her a little, but all the while she saw Emily's eyes and
-heard her voice.
-
-Hubert, however, was full of happiness--the sweet happiness of the quiet,
-docile creature that has at last obtained what it loves.
-
-
-
-
-XIX
-
-
-Emily awoke shivering; the fire had gone out, the room was in darkness, and
-the house seemed strange and lonely. She rang the bell, and asked the
-servant if he had seen Mr. Price. Mr. Price had gone out late in the
-afternoon, and had not come in. Where was Mrs. Bentley? Mrs. Bentley had
-gone out earlier in the afternoon, and had not come in.
-
-She suspected the truth at once. They had gone to London to be married. The
-servant lighted a candle, made up the fire, and asked if she would wait
-dinner. Emily made no answer, but sat still, her eyes fixed, looking into
-space. The man lingered at the door. At that moment her little dog bounded
-into the room, and, in a paroxysm of delight, jumped on his mistress's lap.
-She took him in her arms and kissed him, and this somewhat reassured the
-alarmed servant, who then thought it was no more than one of Miss Emily's
-queer ways. Dandy licked his mistress's face, and rubbed his rough head
-against her shoulder. He seemed more than usually affectionate that
-evening. Suddenly she caught him up in her arms, and kissed him
-passionately. 'Not even for your sake, dearest Dandy, can I bear with it
-any longer! We are all very selfish, and it is selfish of me to leave you,
-but I cannot help it.' Then a doubt crossed her mind, and she raised her
-head and listened to it. It seemed difficult to believe that he had told
-her a falsehood--cruel, wicked falsehood--he who had been so kind. And
-yet---- Ah! yes, she knew well enough that it was all true; something told
-her so. The lancinating pain of doubt passed away, and she remained
-thinking of the impossibility of bearing any longer with the life.
-
-An hour passed, and the servant came with the news that Mr. Price and Mrs.
-Bentley had gone to London; they had taken the half-past five train. 'Yes,'
-she said, 'I know they have.' Her voice was calm. There was a strange
-hollow ring in it, and the servant wondered. A few minutes after, dinner
-was announced; and to escape observation and comment she went into the
-dining-room, tasted the soup, and took a slice of mutton on her plate. She
-could not eat it. She gave it to Dandy. It was the last time she should
-feed him. How hungry he was! She hoped he would not care to eat it; he
-would not if he knew she was going to leave him.
-
-In the drawing-room he insisted on being nursed; and alone, amid the faded
-furniture, watched over by the old portraits, her pale face fixed and her
-pale hands clasping her beloved dog, she sat thinking, brooding over the
-unhappiness, the incurable unhappiness, of her little life. She was
-absorbed in self, and did not rail against Hubert, or even Julia. Their
-personalities had somehow dropped out of her mind, and merely represented
-forces against which she found herself unable any longer to contend. Nor
-was she surprised at what had happened. There had always been in her some
-prescience of her fate. She and unhappiness had always seemed so
-inseparable, that she had never found it difficult to believe that this
-last misfortune would befall her. She had thought it over, and had decided
-that it would be unendurable to live any longer, and had borne many a
-terrible insomnia so that she might collect sufficient chloral to take her
-out of her misery; and now, as she sat thinking, she remembered that she
-had never, never been happy. Oh! the miserable evenings she used to spend,
-when a child, between her father and mother, who could not agree--why, she
-never understood. But she used to have to listen to her mother addressing
-insulting speeches to her father in a calm, even voice that nothing could
-alter; and, though both were dead and years divided her from that time, the
-memory survived, and she could see it all again--that room, the very paper
-on the wall, and her father being gradually worked up into a frenzy.
-
-When she was left an orphan, Mr. Burnett had adopted her, and she
-remembered the joy of coming to Ashwood. She had thought to find happiness
-there; but there, as at home, fate had gone against her, and she was hardly
-eighteen when Mr. Burnett had asked her to marry him. She had loved that
-old man, but he had not loved her; for when she had refused to marry him he
-had broken all his promises and left her penniless, careless of what might
-become of her. Then she had given her whole heart to Julia, and Julia, too,
-had deceived her. And had she not loved Hubert?--no one would ever know how
-much; she did not know herself,--and had he not lied to her? Oh, it was
-very cruel to deceive a poor little girl in this heartless way! There was
-no heart in the world, that was it--and she was all heart; and her heart
-had been trampled on ever since she could remember. And when they came back
-they would revenge themselves upon her--insult her with their happiness;
-perhaps insist on sending her away.
-
-Dandy drowsed on her lap. The servant brought in the tea, and when he
-returned to the kitchen he said he had never seen any one look so
-ghost-like as Miss Emily. The clock ticked loudly in the silence of the old
-room, the hands moving slowly towards ten. She waited for the hour to
-strike; it was then that she usually went to bed. Her thoughts moved as in
-a nightmare; and paramount in this chaotic mass of sensation was an acute
-sense of the deception that had been practised on her; with the
-consciousness, now firm and unalterable, that it had become impossible for
-her to live. When the clock struck she got up from her chair, and the
-movement seemed to react on her brain; her thoughts unclouded, and she went
-up-stairs thinking clearly of her love of this old house. The old gentleman
-in the red coat, his hand on his sword, looked on her benignly; and the
-lady playing the spinet smiled as sweetly as was her wont. Emily held up
-the candle to the picture of the windmill. She had always loved that
-picture, and the sad thought came that she should never see it again.
-Dandy, who had galloped up-stairs, stood looking through the banisters,
-wagging his tail.
-
-The moment she got into her room she wrote the following note: 'I have
-taken an overdose of chloral. My life was too miserable to be borne any
-longer. I forgive those who have caused my unhappiness, and I hope they
-will forgive me any unhappiness I have caused them.' They were nothing to
-her now; they were beyond her hate, and the only pang she felt was parting
-with her beloved Dandy. There he stood looking at her, standing on the edge
-of the bed, waiting for her to cover him up and put him to sleep in his own
-corner. 'Yes, Dandy, in a moment, dear--have patience.' She looked round
-the little room, and, remembering all that she had suffered there, thought
-that the walls must be saturated with grief, like a sponge.
-
-It was a common thing at that time for her to stand before the glass and
-address such words as these to herself: 'My poor girl, how I pity you, how
-I pity you!' And now, looking at herself very sadly, she said, 'My poor
-girl, I shall never pity you any more!' Having hung up her dress, she
-fetched a chair and took various doses of chloral out of the hollow top of
-her wardrobe, where she had hidden things all her life--sweets, novels,
-fireworks. They more than half-filled the tumbler; and, looking at the
-sticky, white liquid, she thought with repugnance of drinking so much of
-it. But, wanting to make quite sure of death, she resolved to take it all,
-and she undressed quickly. She was very cold when she got into bed. Then a
-thought struck her, and she got out of bed to add a postscript to her
-letter. 'I have only one request to make. I hope Dandy will always be taken
-care of.' Surprised that she had not wrapped him up and told him he was to
-go to sleep, the dog stood on the edge of the bed, watching her so
-earnestly that she wondered if he knew what she was going to do. 'No, you
-don't know, dear--do you? If you did, you wouldn't let me do it; you'd bark
-the house down, I know you would, my own darling.' Clasping him to her
-breast, she smothered him with kisses, then put him away in his corner,
-covering him over for the night.
-
-She felt neither grief nor fear. Through much suffering, thought and
-sensation were, to a great extent, dead in her; and, in a sort of emotive
-numbness, she laid her candlestick in its usual place on the chair by her
-bedside; and, sitting up in bed, her night-dress carefully buttoned,
-holding the tumbler half-filled with chloral, she tried to take a
-dispassionate survey of her life. She thought of what she had endured, and
-what she would have to endure if she did not take it. Then she felt she
-must go, and without hesitation drank off the chloral. She placed the
-tumbler by the candlestick, and lay down, remembering vaguely that a long
-time ago she had decided that suicide was not wrong in itself. The last
-thing she remembered was the clock striking eleven.
-
-For half an hour she slept like stone. Then her eyes opened, and they told
-of sickness now in motion within her. And, strangely enough, through the
-overpowering nausea rising from her stomach to her brain, the thought that
-she was not going to die appeared perfectly clear, and with it a sense of
-disappointment; she would have to begin it all over again. It was with
-great difficulty that she struck a match and lighted a candle. It seemed
-impossible to get up. At last she managed to slip her legs out of bed, and
-found she could stand, and through the various assaults of retching she
-thought of the letter: it must be destroyed; and, leaning in the corner
-against the wall and the wardrobe, she tried to recover herself. A dull,
-deep sleep was pressing on her brain, and she thought she would never be
-able to cross the room to where the letter was. Dandy looked out of his
-rug; she caught sight of his bright eyes.
-
-On cold and shaky feet she attempted to make her way towards the letter;
-but the room heaved up at her, and, fearing she should fall, and knowing if
-she did that she would not be able to regain her feet, she clung to the
-toilette-table. She must destroy that letter: if it were found, they would
-watch her; and, however impossible her life might become, she would not be
-able to escape from it. This consideration gave her strength for a final
-effort. She tore the letter into very small pieces, and then, clinging to a
-chair, strove to grasp the rail of the bed; but the bed rolled worse than
-any ship. Making a supreme effort, she got in; and then, neither dreams nor
-waking thoughts, but oblivion complete. Hours and hours passed, and when
-she opened her eyes her maid stood over the bed, looking at her.
-
-'Oh, miss, you looked so tired and ill that I didn't wake you. You do seem
-poorly, miss. It is nearly two o'clock. Should you like to sleep a little
-longer, or shall I bring you up some breakfast?'
-
-'No, no, no, thank you. I couldn't touch anything. I'm feeling wretched;
-but I'll get up.'
-
-The maid tried to dissuade her; but Emily got out of bed, and allowed
-herself to be dressed. She was very weak--so weak that she could hardly
-stand up at the washstand; and the maid had to sponge her face and neck.
-But when she had drunk a cup of tea and eaten a little piece of toast, she
-said she felt better, and was able to walk into the drawing-room. She
-thought no more of death, nor of her troubles; thought drowned in her; and
-in a passive, torpid state she sat looking into the fire till dinner-time,
-hardly caring to bestow a casual caress on Dandy, who seemed conscious of
-his mistress's neglect, for, in his sly, coaxing way, he sometimes came and
-rubbed himself against her feet. She went into the dining-room, and the
-servant was glad to see that she finished her soup, and, though she hardly
-tasted it, she finished a wing of a chicken, and also the glass of wine
-which the man pressed upon her. Half an hour after, when he brought out the
-tea, he found her sitting on her habitual chair nursing her dog, and
-staring into the fire so drearily that her look frightened him, and he
-hesitated before he gave her the letter which had just come up from the
-town; but it was marked 'Immediate.'
-
-When he left the room she opened it. It was from Mrs. Bentley:--
-
-'Dearest Emily,--I know that Hubert told you that he was not going to marry
-me. He thought he was not, for I had refused to marry him; but a short time
-after we met in the park quite accidentally, and--well, fate took the
-matter out of our hands, and we are to be married to-morrow. Hubert insists
-on going to Italy, and I believe we shall remain there two months. We have
-made arrangements for your aunt to live with you until we come back; and
-when we do come back, I hope all the little unpleasantnesses which have
-marred our friendship for this last month or two will be forgotten. So far
-as I am concerned, nothing shall be left undone to make you happy. Your
-will shall be law at Ashwood so long as I am there. If you would like to
-join us in Italy, you have only to say the word. We shall be delighted to
-have you.'
-
-Emily could read no more. 'Join them in Italy!' She dashed the letter into
-the fire, and an intense hatred of them both pierced her heart and brain.
-It was the kiss of Judas. Oh, those hateful, lying words! To live here with
-her aunt until they came back, to wait here quietly until she returned in
-triumph with him--him who had been all the world to her. Oh no; that was
-not possible. Death, death--escape she must. But how? She had no more
-chloral. Suddenly she thought of the lake. 'Yes, yes; the lake, the lake!'
-And then a keen, swift, passionate longing for death, such as she had not
-felt at all the night before, came upon her. There was the knowledge too
-that by killing herself she would revenge herself on those who had killed
-her. She was just conscious that her suicide would have this effect, but
-hardly a trace of such intention appeared in the letter she wrote; it was
-as melancholy and as brief as the letter she had torn up, and ended, like
-it, with a request that Dandy should be well looked after. She had only
-just directed the envelope when she heard the servant coming to take away
-the tea-things. She concealed the letter; and when his steps died away in
-the corridor and the house-door closed, she knew she could slip out
-unobserved. Instinctively she thought of her hat and jacket, and, without a
-shudder, remembered she would not need them. She sped down the pathway
-through the shadow of the firs.
-
-It was one of those warm nights of winter when a sulphur-coloured sky hangs
-like a blanket behind the wet, dishevelled woods; and, though there was
-neither moon nor star, the night was strangely clear, and the shadow of the
-bridge was distinct in the water. When she approached the brink the swans
-moved slowly away. They reminded her of the cold; but the black obsession
-of death was upon her; and, hastening her steps, she threw herself forward.
-She fell into shallow water and regained her feet, and for a moment it
-seemed uncertain if she would wade to the bank or fling herself into a
-deeper place. Suddenly she sank, the water rising to her shoulders. She was
-lifted off her feet. A faint struggle, a faint cry, and then
-nothing--nothing but the whiteness of the swans moving through the sultry
-night slowly towards the island.
-
-
-
-
-XX
-
-
-Its rich, inanimate air proclaimed the room to be an expensive bedroom in a
-first-class London hotel. Interest in the newly-married couple, who were to
-occupy the room, prompted the servants to see that nothing was forgotten;
-and as they lingered steps were heard in the passage, and Hubert and Julia
-entered. The maid-servants stood aside to let them pass, and one inquired
-if madame wanted anything, so that her eyes might be gratified with a last
-inquisition of the happy pair.
-
-'How wonderful! oh, how wonderful! I don't think I ever saw any one act
-before like that--did you?'
-
-'She certainly had three or four moments that could not be surpassed. Her
-entrance in the sleep-walking scene--what vague horror! what pale
-presentiment! how she filled the stage! nothing seemed to exist but she.'
-
-'And Ford; what did you think of Ford's Macbeth?'
-
-'Very good. Everything he does is good. Talent; but the other has genius.'
-
-'I shall never forget this evening. What an awful tragedy!'
-
-'Perhaps I should have taken you to see something more cheerful; but I
-wanted to see Miss Massey play Lady Macbeth. But let us talk of something
-else. Splendid fire--is it not?'
-
-Hubert threw off his overcoat, the movement attracted Julia's attention,
-and it startled her to see how old he seemed to have grown. She noticed as
-she had not noticed before the grey in his beard and the pathetic weary
-look that haunted his eyes. And she understood in that instant that the
-look his face wore was the look of those who have failed in their vocation.
-
-And at that very moment he was wondering if he really loved her, if his
-marriage were a mistake. The passion he had felt when walking with her on
-the wet country road he felt no longer, only an undefinable sadness and a
-weariness which he could not understand. He looked at his wife, and fearing
-that she divined his thoughts, he kissed her. She returned his kiss coldly
-and he wondered if she loved him. He thought that it was improbable that
-she did. Why should she love him? He had never loved any one. He had never
-inspired love in any one, except perhaps Emily.
-
-'I wonder if you really wished to be married,' she said.
-
-'I always wished to be married,' he replied. 'I hated the Bohemianism I was
-forced to live in. I longed for a home, for a wife.'
-
-'You were very poor once?'
-
-'Yes: I've lived on tenpence and a shilling a day. I've worked in the docks
-as a labourer. I went down there hoping to get a clerkship on board one of
-the Transatlantic steamers. I had had enough of England, and thought of
-seeking fortune elsewhere.'
-
-'I can hardly believe you worked as a labourer in the docks.'
-
-'Yes; I did. I saw some men going to work, and I joined them. I don't think
-I thought much about it at the time. A very little misery rubs all the
-psychology out of us, and we return more easily than one thinks to the
-animal.'
-
-'And then?'
-
-'At the end of a week the work began to tell upon me, and I drifted back in
-search of my manuscript.'
-
-'But you must have been in a dreadful condition; your clothes----'
-
-'Ah! thereby hangs a tale. An actress lived in one of the houses I had been
-lodging in.'
-
-'Oh, tell me about her! This is getting very interesting.'
-
-Then passing his arm round his wife's neck, and with her sweet blonde face
-looking upon him, and the insinuating warmth of the fire about them, he
-told her the story of his failure.
-
-'But,' she said, her voice trembling, 'you would not have committed
-suicide?'
-
-'No man knows beforehand whether he will commit suicide. I can only say
-that every other issue was closed.'
-
-At the end of a long silence Julia said, 'I wish you hadn't spoken about
-suicide. I cannot but think of Emily. If she were to make away with
-herself! The very possibility turns my heart to ice. What should I do--what
-should we do? I ought never to have given way; we were both abominably
-selfish. I can see that poor girl sitting alone in that house grieving her
-heart out.'
-
-'You think that we ought never to have given way!'
-
-'I suppose we ought not. I tried very hard, you know I did.... But do you
-regret?' she said, looking at him suddenly.
-
-'No; I don't regret, but I wish it had happened otherwise.'
-
-'You don't fear anything. Nothing will happen. What can happen?'
-
-'The most terrible things often happen--have happened.'
-
-'Emily may have been fond of me--I think she was; but it was no more than
-the hysterical caprice of a young girl. Besides, people do not die for
-love; and I assure you it will be all right. This is not a time for gloomy
-thoughts.'
-
-'I'll try not to think of her. Well, what were we talking about? I know:
-about the actress who lived in 17 Fitzroy Street. Tell me about her.'
-
-'She was a real good girl. If she hadn't lent me that five shillings, I
-don't know where I should be now.'
-
-'Were you very fond of her?'
-
-'No; there never was anything of that sort between us. We were merely
-friends.'
-
-'And what has become of this actress?'
-
-'You saw her to-night?'
-
-'Was she acting in the piece we saw to-night?'
-
-'It was she who played Lady Macbeth.'
-
-'You are joking.'
-
-'No, I'm not. I always knew she had genius, and they have found it out; but
-I must say they have taken their time about it.'
-
-'How wonderful! she has succeeded!'
-
-'Yes, _she_ has succeeded!'
-
-'And she is really the girl you intended to play Lady Hayward?'
-
-'Yes; and I hope she will play the part one of these days.'
-
-'Of course, she is just the woman for it. What a splendid success she has
-had! All London is talking about her.'
-
-'And I remember when Ford refused to cast her for the adventuress in
-_Divorce_. If he had, there is no doubt she would have carried the piece
-through. Life is but a bundle of chances; she has succeeded, whatever that
-may mean.'
-
-'But you will let her have the part of Lady Hayward?'
-
-'Yes, of course--that is to say, if----'
-
-'Why "if"?'
-
-'My thoughts are with you, dear; literature seems to have passed out of
-sight.'
-
-'But you must not sacrifice your talent in worship of me. I shall not allow
-you. For my sake, if not for hers, you must finish that play. I want you to
-be famous. I should be for ever miserable if my love proved a upas-tree.'
-
-'A upas-tree! It will be you who will help me; it will be your presence
-that will help me to write my play. I was always vaguely conscious that you
-were a necessary element in my life; but I did not wake up to any knowledge
-of it until that day--do you remember?--when you came into my study to ask
-me what fish I'd like for dinner, and I begged of you to allow me to read
-to you that second act. It is that second act that stops me.'
-
-'I thought you had written the second act to your satisfaction. You said
-that after the talk we had that afternoon you wrote for three hours without
-stopping, and that you had never done better work.'
-
-'Yes, I wrote a great deal; but on reading it over I found that--I don't
-mean to say that none of it will stand; some still seems to me to be all
-right, but a great deal will require alteration.'
-
-The conversation fell. At the end of a long silence Hubert said--
-
-'What are you thinking of, dearest?'
-
-'I was thinking that supposing you were mistaken--if I failed to help you
-in your work.'
-
-'And I never succeeded in writing my play?'
-
-'No; I don't mean that. Of course you will write your play; all you have to
-do is to be less critical.'
-
-'Yes, I know--I have heard that before; but, unfortunately, we cannot
-change ourselves. I'll either carry my play through completely, realise my
-ideal, or----'
-
-'Remain for ever unsatisfied?'
-
-'Whether I write it or no, I shall be happy in your love.'
-
-'Yes, yes; let us be happy.'
-
-They looked at each other. He did not speak, but his thought said--
-
-'There is no happiness on earth for him who has not accomplished his task.'
-
-'Shall we be happy? I wonder. We have both suffered,' she said, 'we are
-both tired of suffering, and it is only right that we should be happy.'
-
-'Yes, we shall be happy, I will be happy. It shall be my pleasure to attend
-to you, to give you all your desire. But you said just now that you had
-suffered. I have told you my past. Tell me yours. I know nothing except
-that you were unhappily married.'
-
-'There is little else to know; a woman's life is not adventurous, like a
-man's. I have not known the excitement of "first nights," nor the striving
-and the craving for an artistic ideal. My life has been essentially a
-woman's life,--suppression of self and monotonous duty, varied by
-heart-breaking misfortune. I married when I was very young; before I had
-even begun to think about life I found---- But why distress these hours
-with painful memories?'
-
-'It is pleasant to look back on the troubles we have passed through.'
-
-'Well, I learnt in one year the meaning of three terrible words--poverty,
-neglect, and cruelty. In the second year of my marriage my husband died of
-drink, and I was left a widow at twenty, entirely penniless. I went to live
-with my sister, and she was so poor that I had to support myself by giving
-music-lessons. You think you know the meaning of poverty: you may; but you
-do not know what a young woman who wants to earn her bread honestly has to
-put up with, trudging through wet and cold, mile after mile, to give a
-lesson, paid for at the rate of one-and-sixpence or two shillings an hour.'
-
-Julia took her eyes from her husband's face, and looked dreamily into the
-fire. Then, raising her face from the flame, she looked around with the air
-of one seeking for some topic of conversation. At that moment she caught
-sight of the corner of a letter lying on the mantelpiece. Reaching forth
-her hand, she took it. It was addressed to her husband.
-
-'Here is a letter for you, Hubert.... Why, it comes from Ashwood. Yes, and
-it is in the hand-writing of one of the servants. Oh, it is Black's
-writing! It may be about Emily. Something may have happened to her. Open it
-quickly.'
-
-'That is not probable. Nothing can have happened to her.'
-
-'Look and see. Be quick!'
-
-Hubert opened the letter, and he had not read three lines when Julia's face
-caught expression from his, which had become overcast.
-
-'It is bad news, I know. Something has happened. What is it? Don't keep me
-waiting. The suspense is worse than the truth.'
-
-'It is very awful, Julia. Don't give way.'
-
-'Tell me what it is. Is she dead?
-
-'Yes; she is dead.' Julia got up from her husband's knees and stood by the
-mantelpiece, leaning upon it. 'It is more than mere death.'
-
-'What do you mean? She killed herself--is that it?'
-
-'Yes; she drowned herself the night before last in the lake.'
-
-'Oh, it is too horrible! Then we have murdered her. Our unpardonable
-selfishness! I cannot bear it!' Her eyes closed and her lips trembled.
-Hubert caught her in his arms, laid her on the chair, and, fetching some
-water in a tumbler, sprinkled her face; then he held it to her lips; she
-drank a little, and revived. 'I'm not going to faint. Tell me--tell me when
-the unfortunate child----'
-
-'They don't know exactly. She was in the drawing-room at tea-time, and the
-drawing-room was empty when Black went round three-quarters of an hour
-after to lock up. He thought she had gone to her room. It was the gardener
-who brought in the news in the morning about nine.'
-
-'Oh, good God!'
-
-'Black says he noticed that she looked very depressed the day before, but
-he thought she was looking better when he brought in the tea.'
-
-'It was then she got my letter. Does Black say anything about giving her a
-letter?'
-
-'Yes, that is to say----'
-
-'I knew it! I knew it!' said Julia; and her eyes were wild with grief, and
-she rocked herself to and fro. 'It was that letter that drove her to it. It
-was most ill-advised. I told you so. You should have written. She would
-have borne the news better had it come from you. My instinct told me so,
-but I let myself be persuaded. I told you how it would happen. I told you.
-You can't say I didn't. Oh! why did you persuade me--why--why--why?'
-
-'Julia dear, we are not responsible. We were in nowise bound to sacrifice
-our happiness to her----'
-
-'Don't say a word! I say we were bound. Life can never be the same to me
-again.'
-
-Hubert did not answer. Nothing he could say would be of the slightest
-avail, and he feared to say anything that might draw from her expressions
-which she would afterwards regret. He had never seen her moved like this,
-nor did he believe her capable of such agitation, and the contrast of her
-present with her usual demeanour made it the more impressive.
-
-'Oh,' she said, leaning forward and looking at him fixedly, 'take this
-nightmare off my brain, or I shall go mad! It isn't true; it cannot be
-true. But--oh! yes, it's true enough.'
-
-'Like you, Julia, I am overwhelmed; but we can do nothing.'
-
-'Do nothing!' she cried; 'do nothing! We can do nothing but pray for
-her--we who sacrificed her.' And she slipped on her knees and burst into a
-passionate fit of weeping.
-
-'The best thing that could have happened,' thought Hubert; and his thought
-said, clearly and precisely, 'Yes; it is awful, shocking, cruel beyond
-measure!'
-
-The fire was sinking, and he built it up quietly, ashamed of this proof of
-his regard for physical comfort, and hoping it would pass unnoticed. His
-pain expressed itself less vehemently than Julia's; but for all that his
-mind ached. He remembered how he had taken everything from her--fortune,
-happiness, and now life itself. It was an appalling tragedy--one of those
-senseless cruelties which we find nature constantly inventing. A thought
-revealed an unexpected analogy between him and his victim. In both lives
-there had been a supreme desire, and both had failed. 'Hers was the better
-part,' he said bitterly. 'Those whose souls are burdened with desire that
-may not be gratified had better fling the load aside. They are fools who
-carry it on to the end.... If it were not for Julia----'
-
-Then he sought to determine what were his exact feelings. He knew he was
-infinitely sorry for poor Emily; but he could not stir himself into a
-paroxysm of grief, and, ashamed of his inability to express his feelings,
-he looked at Julia, who still wept.
-
-'No doubt,' he thought, 'women have keener feelings than we have.'
-
-At that moment Julia got up from her knees. She had brushed away her tears.
-Her face was shaken with grief.
-
-'My heart is breaking,' she said. 'This is too cruel--too cruel! And on my
-wedding night.'
-
-Their eyes met; and, divining each other's thought, each felt ashamed, and
-Julia said--
-
-'Oh, what am I saying? This dreadful selfishness, from which we cannot
-escape, that is with us even in such a moment as this! That poor child gone
-to her death, and yet amid it all we must think of ourselves.'
-
-'My dear Julia, we cannot escape from our human nature; but, for all that,
-our grief is sincere. We can do nothing. Do not grieve like that.'
-
-'And why not? She was my best friend. How have I repaid her? Alas! as woman
-always repays woman for kindness done. The old story. I cannot forgive
-myself. No, no! do not kiss me! I cannot bear it. Leave me. I can see
-nothing but Emily's reproachful face.' She covered her face in her hands
-and sobbed again.
-
-The same scenes repeated themselves over and over again. The same fits of
-passionate grief; the same moment of calm, when words impregnated with self
-dropped from their lips. The same nervous sense that something of the dead
-girl stood between them. And still they sat by the fire, weary with sorrow,
-recrimination, long regret, and pain. They could grieve no more; and before
-dawn sleep pressed upon their eyelids, and at the end of a long silence he
-dozed--a pale, transparent sleep, through which the realities of life
-appeared almost as plainly as before. Suddenly he awoke, and he shivered in
-the chill room. The fire was sinking; dawn divided the window-curtains. He
-looked at his wife. She seemed to him very beautiful as she slept, her face
-turned a little on one side, and again he asked himself if he loved her.
-Then, going to the window, he drew the curtains softly, so as not to awaken
-her; and as he stood watching a thin discoloured day breaking over the
-roofs, it again seemed to him that Emily's suicide was the better part.
-'Those who do not perform their task in life are never happy.' The words
-drilled themselves into his brain with relentless insistency. He felt a
-terrible emptiness within him which he could not fill. He looked at his
-wife and quailed a little at the thought that had suddenly come upon him.
-She was something like himself--that was why he had married her. We are
-attracted by what is like ourselves. Emily's passion might have stirred
-him. Now he would have to settle down to live with Julia, and their similar
-natures would grow more and more like one another. Then, turning on his
-thoughts, he dismissed them. They were the morbid feverish fancies of an
-exceptional, of a terrible night. He opened the window quietly so as not to
-awaken his wife. And in the melancholy greyness of the dawn he looked down
-into the street and wondered what the end would be.
-
-He did not think that he would live long. Disappointed men--those who have
-failed in their ambition--do not live to make old bones. There were men
-like him in every profession--the arts are crowded with them. He had met
-barristers and soldiers and clergy-men, just like himself. One hears of
-their deaths--failure of the heart's action, paralysis of the brain, a
-hundred other medical causes--but the real cause is, lack of appreciation.
-
-He would hang on for another few years, no doubt; during that time he must
-try to make his wife happy. His duty was now to be a good husband, at all
-events, there was that.
-
-His wife lay asleep in the arm-chair, and fearing she might catch cold, he
-came into the room closing the window very gently behind him.
-
-THE END
-
-Printed by T. and A. Constable, printers to Her Majesty at the Edinburgh
-University Press.
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