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+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 10719 ***
+
+Note: Project Gutenberg also has an HTML version of this
+ file which includes the original illustration.
+ See 10719-h.htm or 10719-h.zip:
+ (http://www.ibiblio.org/gutenberg/1/0/7/1/10719/10719-h/10719-h.htm)
+ or
+ (http://www.ibiblio.org/gutenberg/1/0/7/1/10719/10719-h.zip)
+
+
+
+
+THE MIRROR OF LITERATURE, AMUSEMENT, AND INSTRUCTION.
+
+VOL. 12, No. 349.] SATURDAY, DECEMBER 6, 1828. [PRICE 2d.
+
+
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+
+THE ARCH OF CONSTANTINE, AT ROME.
+
+[Illustration: The Arch of Constantine, at Rome.]
+
+"Still harping" on the Fine Arts--_Architecture_ and _Painting_. Of
+the former, the above engraving is an illustration; and of the latter,
+our readers will find a beautiful subject (from one of _Turner's_
+pictures) in a _Supplement published with the present Number_.[1]
+
+ [1] The Second of "the Spirit of the Annuals," containing a fine
+ Engraving, after a celebrated picture by Turner, and a string of
+ POETICAL GEMS from the Anniversary, Keepsake, and Friendship's
+ Offering, with unique extracts from such of "the Annuals" as were
+ not noticed in the previous Supplement.
+
+The Arches of Rome were splendid monuments of triumph, erected in
+honour of her illustrious generals. They were at first very simple,
+being built of brick or hewn stone, and of a semicircular figure; but
+afterwards more magnificent, built of the finest marble, and of a
+square figure, with a large, arched gate in the middle, and two small
+ones on each side, adorned with columns and statues. In the vault of
+the middle gate, hung winged figures of victory, bearing crowns in
+their hands, which, when let down, they placed on the victor's head,
+when he passed in triumph.
+
+The _Arch of Constantine_, the most noble of all of these structures,
+subsists almost entire. It was erected by the senate and Roman people,
+in honour of Constantine, after his victory over Maxentius, and
+crosses the Appian Way, at the junction of the Coelian and Palatine
+Hills. Here it stands as the last monument of Roman triumph, or like
+the December sun of "the world's sole monument."
+
+This building consists of three arches, of which the centre is the
+largest; and has two fronts, each adorned with four columns of giallo
+antico marble, of the Corinthian order, and fluted, supporting a
+cornice, on which stand eight Dacian captives of Pavonazzetta, or
+violet-coloured marble.
+
+The inscription on both sides of the architrave imports, that it was
+dedicated "to the Emperor Cæsar Flavius Constantine Augustus, the
+greatest, pious, and the happy; because by a divine impulse, the
+greatness of his courage, and the aid of his army, he avenged the
+republic by his just arms, and, at the same time, rescued it from the
+tyrant and his whole faction." On one side of the arch are the words,
+"Liberatori urbis," to the deliverer of the city; and on the other,
+"Fundatori quietis," to the founder of public tranquillity.
+
+Although erected to the honour of Constantine, this arch commemorates
+the victories of Trajan, some of the basso-relievos, &c. having
+been pilfered from one of the arches of Trajan. This accounts for
+the Dacian captives, whose heads Lorenzo de Medicis broke off and
+conveyed to Florence, but the theft might not have been so notorious
+to posterity, had not the artists of Constantine's time added some
+figures of inferior merit. Forsyth says, "Constantine's reign was
+notorious for architectural robbery;" and the styles of the two
+emperors, in the present arch, mar the harmony by their unsightly
+contrasts.
+
+Although the decree for erecting this arch was, without doubt, passed
+immediately after the defeat of Maxentius, it appears from the
+monument itself, that the building was not finished and dedicated till
+the tenth year of Constantine's reign, or the year of Christ 315 or
+316.
+
+The newly-erected arch opposite the entrance to Hyde Park is from the
+Roman arch, though, we believe, not from any particular model. In the
+View of the New Palace, St. James's Park, (in our No. 278,) the arch,
+to be called the Waterloo Monument, and erected in the middle of the
+area of the palace, will be nearly a copy of that of Constantine
+at Rome. In the court-yard of the Tuilleries at Paris, there is a
+similar arch, copied from that of Septimius Severus. This was formerly
+surmounted by the celebrated group of the horses of St. Mark, pilfered
+from Venice, but restored at the peace of 1815.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE BEGGAR'S DAUGHTER OF BETHNAL GREEN.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+The popular ballad of "The Beggar's Daughter of Bednall-Greene" was
+written in the reign of Queen Elizabeth. It is founded, though without
+the least appearance of truth, or even probability, on a legend of
+the time of Henry III. Henry de Montfort, son of the ambitious Earl
+of Leicester, who was slain with his father at the memorable battle
+of Evesham, is the hero of the tale. He is supposed (according to
+the legend) to have been discovered among the bodies of the slain
+by a young lady, in an almost lifeless state, and deprived of sight
+by a wound, which he had received during the engagement. Under
+the fostering hand of this "faire damosel" he soon recovered, and
+afterwards marrying her, she became the mother of "the comelye and
+prettye Bessee." Fearing lest his rank and person should be discovered
+by his enemies, he disguised himself in the habit of a beggar, and
+took up his abode at Bethnal-Green. The beauty of his daughter
+attracted many suitors, and she was at length married to a noble
+knight, who, regardless of her supposed meanness and poverty, had the
+courage to make her his wife, her other lovers having deserted her on
+account of her low origin. Before entering, however, upon the ballad,
+it may not, perhaps, be thought irrelevant to give a brief sketch of
+the family of the De Montforts.
+
+Simon de Montfort, created Earl of Leicester by Henry III., was the
+younger son of Simon de Montfort, the renowned but cruel commander
+of the croisade against the Albigenses. This nobleman was greatly
+honoured by Henry III., to whose sister, the Countess Dowager of
+Pembroke, he paid his addresses, and was married, with the consent
+of her brother. For the favour thus shown him by his sovereign, he,
+however, proved ungrateful: his inordinate ambition, cloaked by a
+pretended zeal for reform, was the cause of those rebellions which, in
+the reign of Henry III., kept the kingdom in such a continued turmoil.
+The different oppressions and successes of the confederate barons,
+who at length got possession of the king's person, and the civil
+wars which ensued, are so well known as to render any remark on the
+subject superfluous; suffice it to say, that the disputes between
+the malcontents and the royal party were at length terminated by the
+battle of Evesham, which decided in favour of the latter. In this
+field fell the Earl of Leicester and his eldest son, Henry de
+Montfort. His death was followed by the total ruin of his family;
+his titles and estates were all confiscated; the countess, his wife,
+who had been extremely active in her designs against the royalists,
+was banished, together with her sons, Simon and Guy, who afterwards
+assassinated their cousin, Henry d'Allmane, when he was endeavouring
+to effect a reconciliation between them and their uncle, Henry IV.
+The head of the earl was sent as a signal of the victory by Roger de
+Mortimer to the countess; but his body, together with that of his
+son Henry, was interred in the Abbey of Evesham; thus leaving the
+improbability of the legend without a shadow of doubt.
+
+As our limits will not allow us to quote the whole of the ballad,[1]
+we must content ourselves with giving the song of the beggar, which,
+as well as being the most interesting, contains the whole of the
+legend concerning de Montfort:--
+
+ A poore beggar's daughter did dwell on a greene,
+ Who for her fairnesse might well be a queene:
+ A blithe bonny lasse, and a daintye was shee,
+ And many one called her pretty Bessee.
+
+ Her father hee had noe goods nor noe land,
+ But begg'd for a penny all day with his hand;
+ And yett to her marriage he gave thousands three,
+ And still he hath somewhat for pretty Bessee.
+
+ And if any one here her birth doe disdaine,
+ Her father is ready, with might and with maine,
+ To prove shee is come of noble degree--
+ Therefore, ever flout att prettye Bessee.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+ Then give me leave, nobles and gentles, each one,
+ One song more to sing, and then I have done;
+ And if that itt may not winn good report,
+ Then doe not give me a GROAT for my sport.
+
+ Sir Simon de Montfort my subject shall bee.
+ Once chiefe of all the great barons was hee--
+ Yet fortune so cruelle this lorde did abase,
+ Now loste and forgotten are hee and his race.
+
+ When the barons in armes did King Henrye oppose,
+ Sir Simon de Montfort their leader they chose--
+ A leader of courage undaunted was hee,
+ And oft-times he made their enemyes flee.
+
+ At length in the battle on Eveshame plaine
+ The barons were routed, and Montfort was slaine;
+ Moste fatall that battel did prove unto thee,
+ Thoughe thou wast not borne then, my prettye Bessee!
+
+ Along with the nobles that fell at that tyde,
+ His eldest son Henrye, who fought by his side,
+ Was fellde by a blowe he receiv'de in the fighte!
+ A blowe that depriv'de him for ever of sight.
+
+ Among the dead bodyes all lifelesse he laye,
+ Till evening drewe on of the following daye,
+ When by a yong ladye discover'd was hee--
+ And this was thy mother, my prettye Bessee!
+
+ A baron's faire daughter stept forth in the nighte,
+ To search for her father, who fell in the fight,
+ And seeing yong Montfort, where gasping he laye,
+ Was moved with pitye, and broughte him awaye.
+
+ In secrette she nurst him, and swaged his paine,
+ While he throughe the realme was beleev'd to be slaine:
+ At lengthe his faire bride she consented to bee,
+ And made him glad father of prettye Bessee.
+
+ And nowe, lest oure foes our lives sholde betraye
+ We clothed ourselves in beggars' arraye;
+ Her jewells shee solde, and hither came wee--
+ All our comfort and care was our prettye Bessee.
+
+ And here have wee lived in fortunes despite,
+ Thoughe poore, yet contented with humble delighte;
+ Full forty winters thus have I beene
+ A silly blind beggar of Bednall-greene.
+
+ And here, noble lordes, is ended the song
+ Of one that once to your owne ranke did belong:
+ And thus have you learned a secrette from mee,
+ That ne'er had beene knowne but for prettye Bessee.
+
+ [1] Vide Percy's "Reliques," vol. ii. p. 178.
+
+At Bethnal-Green is an old mansion, which, in the survey of 1703, was
+called _Bethnal-Green-House_, and which the inhabitants, with their
+usual love of traditionary lore, assign as the "Palace of the Blind
+Beggar." This house was erected in the reign of Queen Elizabeth, by
+John Kirby, citizen of London, and was, says Stow,[1] "lofty like a
+castle." It was afterwards the residence of Sir Hugh Platt, Knight,
+the author of many ingenious works; from him it came into the
+possession of Sir William Ryder, Knight, who died there in 1669; of
+late years it has been used as a private madhouse. The tradition of
+the beggar is still preserved on the sign-posts of several of the
+public-houses in the neighbourhood.
+
+ [1] Strype's Stowe, vol. ii. p. 47, edit. 1755.
+
+S.I.B.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+HISTORY AND ANTIQUITY OF WILLS.
+
+(_For the Mirror._)
+
+According to Blackstone, wills are of high antiquity. We find them
+among the ancient Hebrews; not to mention what Eusebius and others
+have related of Noah's testament, made in writing, and witnessed under
+his seal, by which he disposed of the whole world. A more authentic
+instance of the early use of testaments occurs in the sacred writings,
+(Genesis, chap. xlviii.) in which Jacob bequeaths to his son Joseph, a
+portion of his inheritance, double to that of his brethren.
+
+The Grecian practice concerning wills (says Potter) was not the same
+in all places; some states permitted men to dispose of their estates,
+others wholly deprived them of that privilege. We are told by
+Plutarch, that Solon is much commended for his law concerning wills;
+for before his time no man was allowed to make any, but all the wealth
+of deceased persons belonged to their families; but he permitted them
+to bestow it on whom they pleased, esteeming friendship a stronger tie
+than kindred, and affection than necessity, and thus put every man's
+estate in the disposal of the possessor; yet he allowed not all sorts
+of wills, but required the following conditions in all persons that
+made them:--
+
+1st. That they must be citizens of Athens, not slaves, or foreigners,
+for then their estates were confiscated for the public use.
+
+2nd. That they must be men who have arrived to twenty years of age,
+for women and men under that age were not permitted to dispose by will
+of more than one _medimn_ of barley.
+
+3rd. That they must not be adopted; for when adopted persons died
+without issue, the estates they received by adoption returned to the
+relations of the men who adopted them.
+
+4th. That they should have no male children of their own, for then
+their estate belonged to these. If they had only daughters, the
+persons to whom the inheritance was bequeathed were obliged to marry
+them. Yet men were allowed to appoint heirs to succeed their children,
+in case these happened to die under twenty years of age.
+
+5th. That they should be in their right minds, because testaments
+extorted through the phrenzy of a disease, or dotage of old age, were
+not in reality the wills of the persons that made them.
+
+6th. That they should not be under imprisonment, or other constraint,
+their consent being then only forced, nor in justice to be reputed
+voluntary.
+
+7th. That they should not be induced to it by the charms and
+insinuations of a wife; for (says Plutarch) the wise lawgiver with
+good reason thought that no difference was to be put between deceit
+and necessity, flattery and compulsion, since both are equally
+powerful to persuade a man from reason.
+
+Wills were usually signed before several witnesses, who put seals to
+them for confirmation, then placed them in the hands of trustees, who
+were obliged to see them performed. At Athens, some of the magistrates
+were very often present at the making of wills. Sometimes the
+_archons_ were also present. Sometimes the testator declared his will
+before sufficient witnesses, without committing it to writing. Thus
+Callias, fearing to be cut off by a wicked conspiracy, is said to have
+made an open declaration of his will before the popular assembly at
+Athens. There were several copies of wills in Diogenes Laertius, as
+those of Aristotle, Lycon, and Theophrastus; whence it appears they
+had a common form, beginning with a wish for life and health.
+
+The most ancient testaments among the Romans were made _vivâ voce_,
+the testator declaring his will in the presence of seven witnesses;
+these they called _nuncupative_ testaments; but the danger of trusting
+the will of the dead to the memory of the living soon abolished these;
+and all testaments were ordered to be in writing.
+
+The Romans were wont to set aside testaments, as being _inofficiosa_,
+deficient in natural duty, if they disinherited or totally passed by
+(without assigning a true and sufficient reason) any of the children
+of the testator. But if the child had any legacy, though ever so
+small, it was a proof that the testator had not lost his memory nor
+his reason, which otherwise the law presumed. Hence probably (says
+Blackstone) has arisen that groundless, vulgar error of the necessity
+of leaving the heir a shilling, or some other express legacy, in order
+to effectually disinherit him; whereas the law of England, though
+the heir, or next of kin, be totally omitted, admits no _querela
+inofficiosa_, to set aside such testament.
+
+Alfred the Great made a will, wherein he declared, in express terms,
+that it was just the English should be as free as their own thoughts.
+
+P.T.W.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+
+THE COSMOPOLITE.
+
+DANCING.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+
+Dancing is defined to be "to move in measure; to move with steps
+correspondent to the sound of instruments." But there are other
+species of dancing--as
+
+ -----------------for three long months
+ To _dance attendance_ for a word of audience:
+
+and to dance with pain, or when, as Lord Bacon says, "in pestilences,
+the malignity of the infecting vapour danceth the principal spirits."
+The _Chorea S. Viti_, or _St. Vitus's Dance_ is another variation,
+said to have once prevailed extensively, and to have been cured by a
+prayer to this saint! whose martyrdom is commemorated on June 15. It
+may not be generally known that a person afflicted with this species
+of dancing can _run_, although he cannot walk or stand still. Another
+and a more agreeable species is to _lead the dance_, an unjust
+usurpation which is practised in a thousand other places beside the
+ball-room.
+
+According to the mythologists, (authorities always quotable, and
+nobody knows why,) the Curetes or Corybantes, a people of Crete, who
+were _produced from rain_, first invented the dance to amuse the
+infant Jupiter--with what success he danced we know not, for when a
+year old he waged war against the Titans, and then his dancing days
+must have terminated.
+
+A history of dancing is, however, not to our purpose; but a few of its
+eccentricities. It occurs in the customs of all people, either as a
+recreation or as a religious ceremony--held in contempt by some, and
+in esteem by others. David danced before the ark; the daughters of
+Shiloh danced in a solemn yearly festival; and the Israelites, (good
+judges) danced round the golden calf.
+
+The ancients had a peculiar _penchant_ for dancing, whether in person
+or by animals; and the feats of the latter distance all the wretched
+efforts of the bears, dogs, and horses of our days. The attempts
+of Galba to amuse the Roman people throw into the shade all the
+peace-rejoicings and illuminations of St. James's and the Green Parks.
+Suetonius, Seneca, and Pliny tell us of _elephants_ in their time that
+were taught to walk the rope, backwards and forwards, up and down,
+with the agility of an Italian rope-dancer. Such was the confidence
+reposed in the docility and dexterity of the animal, that a person
+sat upon an elephant's back, while he walked across the theatre
+upon a rope, extended from the one side to the other. Lipsius,
+who has collected these testimonies, thinks them too strong to be
+doubted--perhaps even stronger than the rope. Scaliger corroborates
+all of them; Busbequius _saw_ an elephant dance a _pas seul_ at
+Constantinople; and Suetonius tells us of twelve elephants, six male
+and six female, who were clothed like men and women, and performed a
+country dance, in the reign of Tiberius. In later times, horses have
+been taught to dance. In the carousals of Louis XIII. there were
+dances of horses; and in the 13th century, some rode a horse upon a
+rope. All this eclipses the puny modern feats of Astley and Ducrow.[1]
+
+ [1] Miraculous dancing is not, however, confined to animals; for
+ William of Malmesbury gravely relates an instance of 15 young
+ women and 18 young men who (by the anathema of a priest) continued
+ dancing a whole year, and wore the earth so much, that, by
+ degrees, they sunk midway into the earth!
+
+The Greeks and Romans were divided upon the propriety of dancing.
+Socrates who held death in contempt, when a reverend old gentleman,
+learned to dance of Aspasia, the beautiful nurse of Grecian eloquence.
+The Romans forgot their loss of the republic and of liberty--
+
+ ------------------the air we breathe
+ If we have it not we die.
+
+in seeing Pylades and Bathyllus dance before them in their
+theatres--an indifference of which we were reminded on hearing that
+the Parisians sat in the _Cafés_ on the Boulevard du Italiens--sipping
+coffee and sucking down ice, during the capitulation of the city, and
+while the French, killed and wounded, were conveyed along the road
+before them.
+
+Cato, _Censorius_, danced at the age of fifty-six. Cicero, however,
+reproached a consul with having danced. Tiberius, that monster of
+indulgences, banished dancers from Rome; and Domitian, the illustrious
+fly-catcher, expelled several of his _members of parliament_ for
+having danced. We are much more civilized, for such an edict as that
+of Domitian would clear our senate-houses as effectually as when
+Cromwell turned out the Long Parliament.
+
+Among the Italians and the French even there have been found enemies
+to dancing. Alfieri, the poet, had a great aversion to dancing; and
+one Daneau wrote a Traité des Danses, in which he maintains that
+"the devil never invented a more effectual way than dancing, to fill
+the world with ----." The bishop of Noyon once presided at some
+deliberations respecting a minuet; and in 1770, a reverend prelate
+presented a document on dancing to the king of France. The Quakers
+consider dancing below the dignity of the Christian character; and an
+enthusiast, of another creed, thinks all lovers of the stage belong to
+the schools of Voltaire and Hume, and that dancing is a link in the
+chain of seduction. Stupid, leaden-heeled people, who constantly mope
+in melancholy, and neither enjoy nor impart pleasure, will naturally
+be enemies to dancing; and such we are induced to think the majority
+of these opponents.
+
+The French are inveterate dancers. They have their _bals parés_ and
+their _salons de danse_ in every street; and as long as the weather
+will permit, they dance on platforms out of doors, and a heavy shower
+of rain will scarcely cool their ardour in the recreation. Some of
+their stage _figurantes_ resemble aerial beings rather than bone and
+blood, for flesh may almost be left out of the composition. But the
+Italians are a nation of dancers as well as the children of song, and
+they seem to have followed the noble example of old Cato, in this
+respect, with better effect than they have studied his virtue. We are
+also told upon good authority, that the American dancers equal any of
+the European _figurantes_.
+
+The English people have always been lovers of dancing; and it forms
+an accompaniment of almost all their old sports and pastimes. Witness
+the maypoles, wassails, and wakes of rural life, and the grotesque
+morris-dance, originating in a kind of Pyrrhic or military dance, and
+described by Sir William Temple as composed of "ten men, who danced a
+maid marian and a tabor and pipe." In the time of Henry VII. dancers
+were remarkably well paid; for in some of his accounts in the
+Exchequer, we find
+
+ £. s. d.
+Paid to a spye, in reward----------------- 2 0 0
+To Pechie, the fool, in rewarde----------- 0 6 8
+To Richard Beden, for writing of bokes---- 0 10 0
+_To the young dameysell that daunceth_---- 30 0 0
+
+In Shakspeare's time, to _dance_ was an elegant accomplishment. Thus
+in the "Merry Wives of Windsor," "What say you to young Mr. Fenton? He
+capers, he _dances_, he has eyes of youth, he writes verses." Locke
+thus alludes to the graceful motions which dancing lends to the human
+frame: "the legs of the dancing-master, and the fingers of a musician,
+fall, as it were, naturally, without thought or pains, into regular
+and admirable motions."
+
+It must be somewhat surprising to those who over-rate the
+matter-of-fact character of the English people, that so great a
+majority of them are attached to _dancing_. Among rank and wealth
+this amusement admits of a finer display of beauty and artificial
+decoration than almost any other recreation; for nothing can be more
+splendid than a brilliantly illuminated and well-filled ball-room.
+Dancing among the middle classes of society is equally mirthful though
+not of so ostentatious a character, and it is a question whether the
+latter, being free from the alloy of fashionable follies, are not more
+exhilarated by sweet sounds than their wealthy superiors. But the
+mushroom aristocracy and pride of purse often operate as checks to the
+enjoyment of both these classes; and splendid dancing accommodations
+sometimes put an end to the amusement. At Dorking, in Surrey, attached
+to one of the inns is a ball-room, which cost the builder £12,000, and
+here is one, or at most three balls during the year, while at scores
+of places within our recollection, of less consequence, there are
+monthly and even weekly balls; and we are inclined to think these
+periodical recreations of great importance to the happiness of country
+towns. But there is a species of intoxication sometimes arising
+from them--that of dancing all night, to suffer from exhaustion and
+rheumatism on the following day--an evil easy of remedy, by such
+amusements being more frequent and less protracted. The influence
+on the character of the people would probably be that of rendering
+it more even, from the admixture or reciprocation of pleasure and
+business being more proportional. This plan would get rid of much of
+the ostentation and expense of a country ball, and would ultimately
+prove the best antidote to the sins of scandal.
+
+As we have spoken of public dancing in the time of Henry VII., we will
+show that the enormous sums paid to _artists_ have nourished their
+conceit to an alarming height. Pitrot, the Vestris of his day, was a
+consummate specimen of this effrontery. At Vienna, he chose to appear
+only in the last act of the ballet. The emperor desired him to come
+forth at the end of the first; Pitrot refused; the court left the
+opera, and then Pitrot told the dancers they would have a hop by
+themselves, which they did. However, this was forgiven; and, at his
+departure, he was presented with the emperor's picture, set with
+brilliants. Pitrot received it with _sang froid_, pressed his thumb
+upon the crystal, crushed the picture to pieces, adding, "Thus I treat
+men not worthy of my friendship." This fellow behaved equally ill
+in France, Prussia, and Russia; but, at length, scouted by all his
+patrons, and, after giving his thousands to opera girls, he wandered
+about Calais in rags and poverty. Farinelli, after accumulating a
+fortune in England, built a superb mansion in Italy, which he called
+the _English Folly_.[1]
+
+ [1] Here is a card "extraordinary" of one of our humble English
+ dancing-masters:--"As Dancing is the poetry of motion, those who
+ wish to sail through the mazes of harmony, or to 'trip it on the
+ light fantastic toe,' will find an able guide in John Wilde, who
+ was formed by nature for a dancing-master.--N.B. Those who have
+ been taught to dance with _a couple of left legs_, had better
+ apply in time, as he effectually cures all bad habits of the
+ kind."
+
+The oddity of some ideas of dancing is really ludicrous. The
+Cambro-Britains, in a very late period, used to be played out of
+church by a fiddle, and to form a dance in the church-yard at the
+end of the service. But the ideas which the Chinese have of dancing
+exceeds all others. When Commodore Anson was at Canton, the officers
+of the _Centurion_ had a ball upon some court holiday: while they were
+dancing, a Chinese, who very quietly surveyed the operation, said,
+softly, to one of the party, "Why don't you let your servants do this
+for you?"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+FINE ARTS.
+
+SCHOOL OF PAINTING AT THE BRITISH INSTITUTION.
+
+_(To the Editor of the Mirror.)_
+
+
+I beg to present you with a brief notice of the School of Painting at
+the British Institution, Pall Mall; you may rely upon its correctness,
+as I have been extremely cautious in making my notes, and in
+ascertaining every particular relative to the subject.
+
+The students at this excellent institution have, for several weeks,
+been arduously engaged in copying the fine pictures which were
+entrusted to the directors by his majesty, and the nobility, for that
+purpose. In general, the students have been very successful, and
+deserve much praise; I must, however, in my prescribed limits, only
+mention a few.
+
+Vandyke's _Duchess de St. Croix_ has been cleverly copied by Mr. Boden
+and Mr. Faulkner; the latter gentleman has well imitated the color and
+the beautiful finish of the original. Messrs. Frisk, Child, Howell
+and M'Call have likewise made clever copies of this _chef d'oeuvre_
+of art. Many bold efforts have been made to copy Hobbima's large
+_Landscape_; Mr. Laporte's is the most complete, though not quite
+spirited enough in the handling. _The Spanish Gentleman_, by
+Velasquez, has engaged the pencils of numerous artists, though they
+have not all been so successful as could have been wished; Messrs.
+Inskipp, Frisk, Morton and Child have produced the best _fac similes_.
+The _Lime Kiln_, by the younger Teniers, has been carefully studied
+by Mr. Gill, &c.; and Messrs. M'Call and Morton, have executed the
+finest studies from _Innocent X._, by Velasquez. _The Embarkation_,
+by Claude, is extremely well imitated in Mr. Cartwright's copy; and
+the _Virgin and Child_, which is one of Julio Romano's best works,
+has met with due attention from Mr. Farrier, and others. Mr. Novice
+has executed the only copy from DeHooge's fine picture--_A Dutch
+Family preparing for a Walk_; and Messrs. Foster and Earl display
+considerable talent in their copies from the _Landscape and Cattle_,
+by Cuyp. Other admirable works by Guido, Rubens, Bassan, Ruysdael,
+Vanderneer, and Canaletta, have met with a host of imitators, from
+whose talents we may anticipate, at no distant period, pictorial
+excellency of the first order. I should discover a want of gallantry,
+and, indeed, be most unjust, were I not to say that the ladies, in
+nearly all their undertakings, have exerted their utmost to excel;
+those especially, who have executed copies in water colours deserve
+the highest recommendation.
+
+G.W.N.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE ANECDOTE GALLERY.
+
+THAXTED HIGHWAYMEN.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+
+The following incident led to the breaking up and dispersion of a gang
+of desperate highwaymen, denominated the Thaxted gang, who about sixty
+years ago used to infest the roads in the neighbourhood of Dunmow,
+Thaxted, and the adjacent towns and villages:--
+
+An opulent farmer of Thaxted, being one day at Dunmow market, received
+a considerable sum of money, the produce of grain and other marketable
+articles, which he had that day disposed of; and going to the inn
+where he had left his horse, he ordered it to be saddled directly
+for the purpose of returning home. In those times every tradesman,
+salesman and a greater part of the publicans and innkeepers knew what
+money each other received on a market day. The innkeeper at whose
+house the farmer was in the habit of putting up at, said to him, "Why
+you are not going home to-night, are you, with all that money about
+you? You will stand a chance of getting a knock on the head."--"Let
+them knock away," answered the farmer. "I have never yet been robbed,
+nor do I think it likely I shall be to-night; so, Robert, get my horse
+ready," calling to the hostler. "Well, but have you any weapons of
+defence?" inquired the publican.--"No, nor none I want," responded the
+farmer. The innkeeper pressed him to take a pair of holster pistols;
+saying, "he might find them handy;" and after a great deal of
+persuasion, he agreed to take _one_, the publican first loading and
+charging it with ball. The farmer put the pistol in his great coat
+pocket, and was on the point of departure when he recollected that he
+had to get a pound of tea at a grocer's shop in the town, a few doors
+from the inn. He instantly ran to the shop for the tea, and while the
+grocer was serving him he made the same remark as the innkeeper had
+done respecting his going home with so considerable a sum as he knew
+the farmer had about him. The farmer made answer, "I am going home
+to-night, but our friend the publican, has lent me a pistol; and if
+any one interrupts me, I intend to blow his brains out."--"Do you
+know," said the grocer, "I do not like that fellow. Will you let me
+look at the pistol if you have it with you."--"O yes, look at it if
+you like. I never fired a pistol in my life; however, should I be
+stopped, I think I could manage it." The grocer took the pistol; drew
+the charge; and found, to the great surprise of the farmer, it was
+only loaded with horse-dung, and a large bullet at the top. "I thought
+he was a rascal, and this confirms it." said the grocer. "Here is
+evidently a plot; now leave your money with me; we will load this
+pistol properly, and you can, if you like, proceed on your journey:
+it may be the means of detecting some one."
+
+The farmer left his money in the hands of the grocer; went back to the
+inn; mounted his horse, and rode off on his journey. About a mile
+from Dunmow, he was stopped by a fellow, well mounted, who instantly
+demanded his money. "I have not got any," replied the farmer, "but I
+have a pistol, with which, if you do not instantly allow me to pass on
+my way home, I will blow your brains out." "You have got money--and as
+to the pistol, you may blow away--blow away, my fine fellow," said the
+chuckling highwayman. The farmer instantly fired, and his assailant
+fell off his horse to the ground with a groan. The farmer galloped
+back to the inn, and inquired of the hostler where his master was.
+"He has been gone out, on horseback, about a quarter of an hour,"
+the hostler replied. "Well, I will tell you what," said the farmer,
+"you may find your master, with his brains blown out, in the road,"
+describing the place where he had had the encounter with the
+innkeeper.
+
+From this time a number of persons resident in and about Thaxted and
+Dunmow, left their places of abode, which circumstance created some
+surprise among the remaining inhabitants; but it was afterwards
+ascertained they formed the desperate gang that had so long and
+successfully robbed, and sometimes murdered, their unsuspecting
+neighbours and the different travellers who had occasion to pass the
+roads on which these marauders were stationed.
+
+J.W.B.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+MANNERS & CUSTOMS OF ALL NATIONS.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+
+WISE MEN OF GOTHAM.
+
+The village of Gotham, about seven miles from Nottingham, has been
+rendered noted by the common proverb of "The Wise Men of Gotham."
+It is observable that a custom has prevailed among many nations of
+stigmatizing the inhabitants of some particular spot as remarkable for
+stupidity. This opprobrious district among the Asiatics was Phrygia.
+Among the Thracians, Abdera; among the Greeks, Boeotia; in England
+it is Gotham. Of the Gothamites ironically called _The Wise Men of
+Gotham_, many ridiculous stories are traditionally told, particularly,
+that often having heard the cuckoo but never seen her, they hedged in
+a bush from whence her note seemed to proceed, so that being confined
+within so small a compass, they might at length satisfy their
+curiosity; and at a place called Court Hill, in this parish, is a bush
+called Cuckoo Bush.
+
+HALBERT H.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+MALLARD NIGHT.
+
+At All Souls' College, Oxford, the _Mallard Night_ is celebrated
+annually on the 14th of January, in remembrance of a very singular
+circumstance, viz. the discovery of a live and excessively large
+mallard, or drake, supposed to have long ranged in a drain or sewer
+of considerable depth. The only probable conjecture respecting its
+extraordinary situation was, that it had fallen when young through the
+bars or grating at the entrance of the drain, (which was of sufficient
+width to receive it if very young,) but was found at a great distance
+from it, on digging for the foundation of the college, (A.D. 1437.) A
+very humorous account of this event was published some years ago by
+Dr. Buckler, subwarden, from a manuscript of Thomas Walsingham, the
+historian, and monk of St. Alban's. It is the cause of much mirth, for
+on the day, and in remembrance of the mallard, many an old and merry
+song is sung.
+
+E.T.S.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+WELSH MARRIAGES.
+
+It appears to me a matter of no small surprise that so economical
+a people as the English should not have adopted such a plan as the
+following by the lower classes of the Welsh. When a young couple
+intend offering themselves at the Temple of Hymen, if they are very
+poor, they generally send a man, called the bidder, round to their
+acquaintance and friends, who invites them, sometimes in rhyme, to
+the wedding; but if they can afford it, they issue circulars. The
+following is a copy of one:--
+
+"_June 27, 1827._
+
+"As we intend to enter the matrimonial state on Thursday, the 19th day
+of July next, we are encouraged by our friends to make a bidding on
+the occasion, the same day, at the Butchers' Arms, Carmarthen, when
+and where the favour of your good and agreeable company is humbly
+solicited; and whatever donation you may be pleased to confer on us
+then, will be thankfully received, warmly acknowledged, and cheerfully
+repaid whenever called for on a similar occasion.
+
+"By your most obedient servants,
+
+"JOHN JONES.
+
+"MARY EVANS."
+
+The persons so invited (if they accept the invitation) generally form
+part of the procession to church, and are preceded by a harper or
+fiddler. After the nuptial knot is tied, they veer their course to
+the public-house mentioned in the bills, where they partake, not of a
+sumptuous banquet, but of the simple, though not the worst, fare of
+bread and cheese and kisses, at the expense of the new married folks.
+After this, a large plate is placed on the table in the room, and they
+proceed to receive the money which each person may be disposed to
+give, whilst one keeps account of the sum and names. They frequently
+receive 50_l._, and sometimes, though seldom, 100_l._; and they have
+the privilege (by paying the duty) of selling the ale to the persons
+assembled. It is to be observed, that the money so deposited cannot be
+reclaimed by the persons who gave it until a similar occasion presents
+itself in their family. By this means the new married couple are
+enabled to procure furniture, and other things requisite for them.
+
+W.H.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+CURIOUS FOUNDATION.
+
+At Spinney, in Cambridgeshire, was an abbey founded in the reign of
+Henry III. near which was a church, built by Lady Mary Bassingburne,
+and given to the Abbey of Spinney, on condition that the monks should
+support seven aged men with the following allowance, viz. one farthing
+loaf, one herring, and one pennyworth of ale per day, and two hundred
+dry turves, one pair of shoes, one woollen garment, and three ells of
+linen every year. Henry Cromwell, second son of Oliver Cromwell, is
+buried here.
+
+HALBERT H.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE SELECTOR,
+
+AND
+
+LITERARY NOTICES OF
+
+_NEW WORKS_
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+ADVENTURES OF ALLAN-A-SOP.
+
+_By Sir Walter Scott, Bart._
+
+The chief of the clan, MacLean of Duart, in the Isle of Mull, had an
+intrigue with a beautiful young woman of his own clan, who bore a son
+to him. In consequence of the child's being, by some accident, born in
+a barn, he received the name of Allan-a-Sop, or Allan of the Straw, by
+which he was distinguished from others of his clan. As his father and
+mother were not married, Allan was of course a bastard or natural son,
+and had no inheritance to look for, save that which he might win for
+himself.
+
+But the beauty of the boy's mother having captivated a man of rank in
+the clan, called MacLean of Torloisk, he married her, and took her
+to reside with him at his castle of Torloisk, situated on the shores
+of the Sound, or small strait of the sea, which divides the smaller
+island of Ulva from that of Mull. Allan-a-Sop paid his mother frequent
+visits at her new residence, and she was naturally glad to see the
+poor boy, both from affection, and on account of his personal strength
+and beauty, which distinguished him above other youths of his age. But
+she was obliged to confer marks of her attachment on him as privately
+as she could, for Allan's visits were by no means so acceptable to
+her husband as to herself. Indeed, Torloisk liked so little to see
+the lad, that he determined to put some affront on him, which should
+prevent his returning to the castle for some time. An opportunity for
+executing his purpose soon occurred.
+
+The lady one morning, looking from the window, saw her son coming
+wandering down the hill, and hastened to put a girdle cake upon
+the fire, that he might have hot bread to his breakfast. Something
+called her out of the apartment after making this preparation, and
+her husband entering at the same time, saw at once what she had been
+about, and determined to give the boy such a reception as should
+disgust him for the future. He snatched the cake from the girdle,
+thrust it into his step-son's hands, which he forcibly closed on the
+scalding bread, saying, "Here, Allan--here is a cake which your mother
+has got ready for your breakfast." Allan's hands were severely burnt;
+and, being a sharp-witted and proud boy, he resented this mark of his
+step-father's ill-will, and came not again to Torloisk.
+
+At this time the western seas were covered with the vessels of
+pirates, who, not unlike the sea-kings of Denmark at an early period,
+sometimes settled and made conquests on the islands. Allan-a-Sop was
+young, strong, and brave to desperation. He entered as a mariner on
+board of one of these ships, and in process of time obtained the
+command, first of one galley, then of a small flotilla, with which he
+sailed round the seas and collected considerable plunder, until his
+name became both feared and famous. At length he proposed to himself
+to pay a visit to his mother, whom he had not seen for many years; and
+setting sail for this purpose, he anchored one morning in the Sound of
+Ulva, and in front of the house of Torloisk. His mother was dead, but
+his stepfather, to whom he was now an object of fear as he had been
+formerly of aversion, hastened to the shore to receive his formidable
+son-in-law, with great affectation of kindness and interest in his
+prosperity; while Allan-a-Sop, who, though very rough and hasty, does
+not appear to have been sullen or vindictive, seemed to take his kind
+reception in good part.
+
+The crafty old man succeeded so well, as he thought, in securing
+Allan's friendship, and in obliterating all recollections of the
+former affront put on him, that he began to think it possible to
+employ him in executing his private revenge upon MacKinnon of Ulva,
+with whom, as was usual between such neighbours, he had some feud.
+With this purpose, he offered what he called the following good advice
+to his son-in-law:--"My dear Allan, you have now wandered over the
+seas long enough; it is time you should have some footing upon land,
+a castle to protect yourself in winter, a village and cattle for your
+men, and a harbour to lay up your galleys. Now, here is the island
+of Ulva, near at hand, which lies ready for your occupation, and it
+will cost you no trouble, save that of putting to death the present
+proprietor, the Laird of MacKinnon, a useless old carle, who has
+cumbered the world long enough."
+
+Allan-a-Sop thanked his stepfather for so happy a suggestion, which
+he declared he would put in execution forthwith. Accordingly, setting
+sail the next morning, he appeared before MacKinnon's house an hour
+before noon. The old chief of Ulva was much alarmed at the menacing
+apparition of so many galleys, and his anxiety was not lessened by the
+news, that they were commanded by the redoubted Allan-a-Sop. Having
+no effectual means of resistance, MacKinnon, who was a man of shrewd
+sense, saw no alternative save that of receiving the invaders,
+whatever might be their purpose, with all outward demonstrations of
+joy and satisfaction. He caused immediate preparations to be made for
+a banquet as splendid as circumstances admitted, hastened down to
+the shore to meet the rover, and welcomed him to Ulva with such an
+appearance of sincerity, that the pirate found it impossible to pick
+any quarrel which might afford a pretence for executing the violent
+purpose which he had been led to meditate.
+
+They feasted together the whole day; and in the evening, as
+Allan-a-Sop was about to retire to his ships, he thanked the Laird
+of MacKinnon for his entertainment, but remarked, with a sigh, that
+it had cost him very dear. "How can that be" said MacKinnon, "when I
+bestowed this entertainment upon you in free good-will?"--"It is true,
+my friend," replied the pirate, "but then it has quite disconcerted
+the purpose for which I came hither; which was to put you to death,
+my good friend, and seize upon your house and island, and so settle
+myself in the world. It would have been very convenient, this island,
+but your friendly reception has rendered it impossible for me to
+execute my purpose; so that I must be a wanderer on the seas for some
+time longer." Whatever MacKinnon felt at hearing that he had been so
+near to destruction, he took care to show no emotion save surprise,
+and replied to his visiter,--"My dear Allan, who was it that put into
+your mind so unkind a purpose towards your old friend; for I am sure
+it never arose from your own generous nature? It must have been your
+father-in-law, old Torloisk, who made such an indifferent husband to
+your mother, and such an unfriendly stepfather to you when you were a
+helpless boy; but now, when he sees you a bold and powerful leader, he
+desires to make a quarrel betwixt you and those who were the friends
+of your youth. If you consider this matter rightly, Allan, you will
+see that the estate and harbour of Torloisk lie as conveniently for
+you as those of Ulva, and that, if you are to make a settlement by
+force, it is much better it should be at the expense of the old churl,
+who never showed you kindness or countenance, than at that of a friend
+like me, who always loved and honoured you."
+
+Allan-a-Sop was struck with the justice of this reasoning; and the old
+offence of his scalded fingers was suddenly recalled to his mind. "It
+is very true what you say, MacKinnon," he replied, "and, besides, I
+have not forgotten what a hot breakfast my father-in-law treated me to
+one morning. Farewell for the present; you shall soon hear news of me
+from the other side of the Sound." Having said thus much, the pirate
+got on board, and commanding his men to unmoor the galleys, sailed
+back to Torloisk, and prepared to land in arms. His father-in-law
+hastened to meet him, in expectation to hear of the death of his
+enemy, MacKinnon. But Allan greeted him in a very different manner
+from what he expected. "You hoary old traitor," he said, "you
+instigated my simple good-nature to murder a better man than yourself.
+But have you forgotten how you scorched my fingers twenty years
+ago, with a burning cake? The day is come that that breakfast must
+be paid for." So saying, he dashed out his father-in-law's brains
+with a battle-axe, took possession of his castle and property,
+and established there a distinguished branch of the clan of
+MacLean.--_Tales of a Grandfather--Second Series._
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+ADVANTAGES OF A GOOD HEART,
+
+_A Fragment from the "Disowned," by the author of "Pelham."_
+
+
+"The next day, Sir Christopher Findlater called on Clarence. 'Let us
+lounge into the park,' said he. 'With pleasure,' replied Clarence;
+and into the park they lounged. By the way they met a crowd, who
+were hurrying a man to prison. The good-hearted Sir Christopher
+stopped--'Who is that poor fellow?' said he. 'It is the
+celebrated'--(in England all criminals are celebrated. Thurtell was
+a hero, Thistlewood a patriot, and Fauntleroy was discovered to be
+exactly like Bonaparte)--'it is the celebrated robber, John Jefferies,
+who broke into Mrs. Wilson's house, and cut the throats of herself and
+her husband, wounded the maid-servant, and split the child's skull
+with the poker.' * * * 'John Jefferies!' exclaimed the baronet, 'let
+us come away.' 'Linden,' continued Sir Christopher, 'that fellow was
+my servant once. He robbed me to some considerable extent. I caught
+him. He appealed to my heart, and you know, my dear fellow, that was
+irresistible, so I let him off. Who could have thought he would have
+turned out so?' And the baronet proceeded to eulogize his own good
+nature, by which it is just necessary to remark, that one miscreant
+had been saved for a few years from transportation in order to rob and
+murder _ad libitum_, and having fulfilled the office of a common pest,
+to suffer on the gallows at last. What a fine thing it is to have a
+good heart! Both our gentlemen now sunk into a reverie, from which
+they were awakened, at the entrance of the park, by a young man in
+rags, who, with a piteous tone, supplicated charity. Clarence, who to
+his honour be it spoken, spent an allotted and considerable part of
+his income in judicious and laborious benevolence, had read a little
+of political morals, then beginning to be understood, and walked on.
+The good-hearted baronet put his hand in his pocket, and gave the
+beggar half-a-guinea, by which a young, strong man, who had only just
+commenced the trade, was confirmed in his imposition for the rest of
+his life; and instead of the useful support, became the pernicious
+incumbrance of society. Sir Christopher had now recovered his spirits.
+'What's like a good action?' said he to Clarence, with a swelling
+breast. The park was crowded to excess; our loungers were joined by
+Lord St. George. His lordship was a staunch Tory. He could not endure
+Wilkes, liberty, or general education. He launched out against the
+enlightenment of domestics. 'What has made you so bitter?' said Sir
+Christopher. 'My valet!' cried Lord St. George; 'he has invented a new
+toasting-fork; is going to take out a patent, make his fortune, _and
+leave me_; that's what I call ingratitude, Sir Christopher; for I
+ordered his wages to be raised five pounds but last year.' 'It _was_
+very ungrateful,' said the ironical Clarence. 'Very!' reiterated
+the good-hearted Sir Christopher. 'You cannot recommend me a valet,
+Findlater,' renewed his lordship; 'a good, honest, sensible fellow,
+who can neither read nor write?' 'N--o--o--that is to say, yes! I can;
+my old servant, Collard, is out of place, and is as ignorant as--as--'
+'I--or you are,' said Lord St. George, with a laugh. 'Precisely,'
+replied the baronet. 'Well, then, I take your recommendation: send
+him to me to-morrow at twelve.' 'I will,' said Sir Christopher. 'My
+dear Findlater,' cried Clarence, when Lord St. George was gone, 'did
+you not tell me some time ago, that Collard was a great rascal, and
+closely _lie_ with Jefferies? and now you recommend him to Lord St.
+George!' 'Hush, hush, hush!' said the baronet; 'he was a great rogue,
+to be sure; but poor fellow, he came to me yesterday with tears in his
+eyes, and said he should starve if I would not give him a character;
+so what could I do?' 'At least, tell Lord St. George the truth,'
+observed Clarence. 'But then Lord St. George would not take him!'
+rejoined the good-hearted Sir Christopher, with forcible _naiveté_.
+'No, no, Linden, we must not be so hard-hearted; we must forgive and
+forget;' and so saying, the baronet threw out his chest, with the
+conscious exultation of a man who has uttered a noble sentiment. The
+moral of this little history is, that Lord St. George, having been
+pillaged 'through thick and thin,' as the proverb has it, for two
+years, at last missed a gold watch, and Monsieur Collard finished his
+career, as his exemplary tutor, Mr. John Jefferies, had done before
+him. Ah! what a fine thing it is to have a good heart. But, to return,
+just as our wanderers had arrived at the further end of the park, Lady
+Westborough and her daughter passed them. Clarence excusing himself to
+his friend, hastened towards them, and was soon occupied in saying the
+prettiest things in the world to the prettiest person, at least in his
+eyes; while Sir Christopher, having done as much mischief as a good
+heart well can do in a walk of an hour, returned home to write a long
+letter to his mother, against 'learning and all such nonsense, which
+only served to blunt the affections and harden the heart.' 'Admirable
+young man!' cried the mother, with tears in her eyes; 'a good heart is
+better than all the heads in the world.' Amen!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+SPIRIT OF THE PUBLIC JOURNALS.
+
+QUADRANGLE OF KING'S COLLEGE, CAMBRIDGE.
+
+
+In the last _New Monthly Magazine_ is an excellent account of this
+splendid structure, in _A Day at Cambridge_,--in which occurs the
+following exquisite little descriptive gem:--
+
+With the exception of a gravel walk, running near to the buildings on
+every side, the whole ground-plot of this quadrangle is covered by an
+unbroken turf, kept, by means of constant and almost hourly attention,
+in that exquisite order which is only to be observed in spots devoted
+to similar purposes, here and at Oxford. The effect of an unbroken
+plot of turf of this kind and quality, and in a situation like this,
+is perfectly unique, and perhaps indescribable. It is supposed to be,
+and in fact is, for all purposes of preservation and beauty, sacred
+from the foot of man or beast; and the feeling arising from this
+circumstance, added to the exquisite natural adaptation of the object
+itself to the purposes of rest and relief from the almost dazzling
+architectural splendour of the surrounding objects, is such as cannot
+be communicated by any other means whatever, and we might in vain
+attempt to describe. It is of such a kind, however, that those who
+are capable of experiencing it, would as soon think of treading upon
+the object that conveys it to them, as those who honour Nature would
+think of rooting up a nest of violets. Speaking for ourselves alone,
+there is but one thing that can disturb and deteriorate the absolute
+tranquillity of mind, and peace of heart, which fall upon us, like
+dew from heaven, on entering a place like that we have attempted to
+describe above; it is, to see a capped and gowned Fellow, profaning
+with his footsteps the floor of that, in some sort, sacred temple,
+merely because he can, by so doing, reach his habitation by a few
+footsteps less than if he kept to the path allotted for him. We look
+upon the act as a species of impiety; to say nothing of its proving,
+to a demonstration, that the person who commits it is either utterly
+insensible to the mysterious harmony that subsists between a certain
+class of natural objects and the heart of man; or utterly disregards
+that harmony, and sets it at naught. He is, in fact, one of whom it
+may in one sense be said, that
+
+ "He hath no music in his soul."
+
+And we are almost tempted to complete the quotation, by adding--
+
+ "Let no such man be trusted!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+A RUSTIC PAIR.
+
+_By Miss Mitford_.
+
+Few damsels of twelve years old, generally a very pretty age, were
+less pretty that Hannah Bint. Short and stunted in her figure, thin
+in face, sharp in feature, with a muddled complexion, wild sun-burnt
+hair, and eyes, whose very brightness had in them something startling,
+over-informed, super-subtle, too clever for her age. At twelve years
+old she had quite the air of a little old fairy. Now, at seventeen,
+matters are mended. Her complexion has cleared; her countenance, her
+figure, has shot up into height and brightness, and a sort of rustic
+grace; her bright, acute eye is softened and sweetened by the womanly
+wish to please; her hair is trimmed, and curled, and brushed with
+exquisite neatness; and her whole dress arranged with that nice
+attention to the becoming, the suitable both in form and texture,
+which would be called the highest degree of coquetry, if it
+did not deserve the better name of propriety. Never was such a
+transmogrification beheld. The lass is really pretty, and Ned Miles
+has discovered that she is so. There he stands, the rogue, close at
+her aide, (for he hath joined her whilst we have been telling her
+little story, and the milking is over!)--there he stands--holding her
+milk-pail in one hand, and stroking Watch with the other; whilst she
+is returning the compliment, by patting Neptune's magnificent head.
+There they stand, as much like lovers as may be; he smiling, and she
+blushing--he never looking so handsome, nor she so pretty, in all
+their lives. There they stand, in blessed forgetfulness of all except
+each other--as happy a couple as ever trod the earth. There they
+stand, and one would not disturb them for all the milk and butter in
+Christendom. I should not wonder if they were fixing the wedding-day.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+RECOLLECTIONS OF A R*T.
+
+_(Concluded from page 365.)_
+
+
+Finding a detachment just setting out to join the Grand Allied Army, I
+thought, as a true Briton, I could do no less than accompany it, and
+prevailed upon all our party to do the same.
+
+The detachment with which I marched, consisted of 80,000. As we had
+little baggage, having crossed the Rhine, we proceeded rapidly through
+a dull, uninteresting country.
+
+The town of Coblentz is situated at the junction of the Rhine
+and the Moselle. Here the majestic Rhine gently flows along in
+all its grandeur, separating the town from the noble fortress of
+Ehrenbreitstein.[1] I crossed over the bridge of boats, and made
+a most minute inspection of this very romantic castle, which gave
+me great pleasure indeed. In a few days I availed myself of a
+passage-boat which was going to Mayence, and was quite enraptured with
+the view on all sides. Rhenish wines, and perhaps also the water,
+I found did not well agree with my stomach; and no inconsiderable
+annoyance, I soon experienced. They seemed, however, to have exactly
+the same effect upon every Englishman I saw, so I was not singular. A
+little brandy soon, however, put me all to rights; and by the time I
+reached Strasbourg, I was perfectly well again, and able to do ample
+justice to her Splendid Pies! I attended high mass in the great
+Cathedral of Strasbourg, and was surprised and pleased at the sight
+of 10,000 soldiers, in review order, drawn up within its walls. It
+was tiresome enough work mounting to the top of the spire, (which
+I ascertained, by the steps I took, to be exactly 490 feet high,
+Strasbourg measure; and this is exactly eight feet higher than St.
+Peter's at Rome), but I made it out, notwithstanding the sulky looks
+of the jackanapes who lives at the top. Nothing can surpass the beauty
+of the view from this cathedral. At your feet you have the ancient
+town, with all its regular fortifications and outworks--the majestic
+Rhine, with its bridge of boats, and ruined Gothic bridge, sublime in
+its decay--and as far as the eye can reach you have an exceedingly
+rich country, everywhere speckled with towns, and fertilized by
+luxuriant streams.
+
+ [1] Apropos--our _Supplement_ contains a fine Engraving of this
+ very spot.
+
+I made a point of visiting my venerable friend, the old Comte de
+Strasbourg, who, unchanged in the rolling on of centuries, lies in his
+glass coffin, to all appearance in the same freshness of health and
+vigour in which, when myself a very young man, I saw him many hundred
+years ago;[1] his countess, his son, and his daughter, keep him
+company, each in their separate place of repose. Alas, alas! the sight
+made me weep.
+
+ [1] The venerable count died about the year 1519. The glass
+ coffins are still shown.
+
+A few days afterwards, I was rather unexpectedly stopped in my tour.
+For a night I had taken up my residence in the carriage of a young
+Englishman, who that day arrived from Rome, the hostler having assured
+me that he would remain for some time. I did so, as I found it much
+quieter and cooler than the hotel "La ville de Lyon," which was
+overcrowded. In the morning, I thought my friends were merely going a
+short drive, so I kept my seat. We, however, travelled on till night,
+when I heard we were bound for London; but as my companions were very
+agreeable, I thought I might as well accompany them the whole way.
+They seemed to be annoyed at every posthouse with their passports,
+&c.; I was never even asked about the matter. The custom-house gentry,
+in their searches, to be sure, occasionally gave me a little trouble,
+but I was soon up to their tricks. We had an avant-courier constantly
+galloping before us, and we travelled with such expedition that we
+reached London in five days; for my fellow-travellers were idle young
+men of fortune, who are of course always in the greatest hurry for the
+end of a journey, because they don't know what to make of themselves
+when it is over.
+
+I had not then an opportunity of seeing Paris, as we only changed
+horses in it. I have since, however, spent many months there, and have
+always been very much pleased with every thing I saw, particularly the
+Catacombs, which were my favourite lounge. When last in Paris, I made
+a narrow escape with my life, as I tumbled headlong into a cask of
+brandy. I, however, managed to scramble out, with the assistance of a
+bit of cord, which happened to be hanging over its side, and which my
+friend pushed in to me. I was little the worse of my ducking; for, as
+soon as I got out, I was set a-laughing by his telling me how to spell
+_brandy_, in both French and English, in three letters, viz. "B.R. and
+Y." and "O.D.V."
+
+In London I made a point, as a stranger, of going everywhere, and was
+certainly much delighted with every thing. I must confess, however,
+that I thought all the acting at the Opera and Theatres, and all the
+eloquence of the Houses of Parliament, as nothing in comparison of
+what I saw and tasted at the East India and London Docks. When I
+was in the House of Lords, a companion whispered to me, that he had
+heard an act read, offering a reward of 10,000_l._ for a _male_
+tortoise-shell cat. This I believe, indeed, is a very safe offer, for
+such a thing was never heard of. And it is certainly as much worth
+their while as making an act that I should never have more than six
+dishes of meat at my dinner, or that I should not be buried in linen
+above twenty shillings Scots value per ell, although I wished it
+particularly, and could well afford to pay for it. There was, however,
+one restrictive act, which had sense in it; and the husbands of the
+present day would, I dare say, give their ears that it were still in
+force, whatever the dressmakers might think of it. But many of their
+acts of Parliament are silly enough--as they must be; for they don't
+like to be thought idle, and imagine that it is necessary to be always
+enacting something.
+
+It is curious, indeed, how fashion should be every thing in the great
+city. A lady could not possibly venture to see her dearest friend on
+earth, or even her own sister, if she happened to live in rather an
+unfashionable part of the town. By so doing, she would expose herself
+to her own footmen, who very properly would lose all respect for her,
+and I suppose instantly leave her service, as, poor fellows, they have
+a rank in life to keep up!! John Bull certainly gives himself many
+airs, to say the least of it. After receiving the greatest kindness
+and hospitality from you in Scotland, and perhaps staying for months
+in your house, he will cut you dead in London. I remember once meeting
+with such a return, but took it, of course, very coolly. Next day,
+when I was arm in arm with ---- ----, I happened again to meet my
+quondam friend, who immediately rushed up to me--I, however, turned
+on my tail, and did not know him.--Fashion is an odd thing after all.
+It is not rank which will do. I have seen many a spendthrift young
+commoner cut his uncle the duke; and being a duchess by no means
+will ensure admittance at Almack's.--I thank my stars, I am not
+fashionable, and am always happy to see my friends!
+
+I was persuaded, soon after reaching London, to go down to Essex for
+a few days, to pay a visit to an old friend. When I arrived at his
+house, which I think they called Waltham Abbey, I was sorry to receive
+the melancholy accounts that he had been devoured, and that, if I did
+not instantly take myself off, I should be dealt with in the same
+manner. The truth was, that a famine had arisen; and it is well known,
+on those occasions, as necessity has no law, that the stronger kills
+the weaker. Day after day the combat is renewed, till at last all
+except one are destroyed, and he is then obliged to decamp, or eat
+himself up, as he likes best. It is in this way that castles, houses,
+&c. which have been long infested by us, are so suddenly entirely
+freed from our presence.
+
+I amused myself in making an excursion to Epping Forest, till I
+thought the civil war at my late friend's habitation might have
+proceeded far enough for my presence to be useful. In the forest,
+one day, I had the luck to kill one of those troublesome reptiles--a
+Tom Cat. I believe, however, it was a house one. After a hard day's
+hunting his highness made too free at a Valerian party. I watched my
+opportunity, and soon put an effectual end to his caterwauling. When
+I returned to the abbey, I found I was in the best possible time--the
+garrison being reduced to about a dozen, and they so weakened and
+tired out with the constant worrying work they had had, that I was
+myself a complete match for any two of them. In a few days the number
+was only four, and in other two days I was sole lord and master.
+
+[He then returns to town.]
+
+At a friend's house, in Berkeley Square, where I met a distinguished
+party, a scene took place, just such as Pope describes--
+
+ Our courtier walks from dish to dish;
+ Tastes, for his friend, of fowl and fish:
+ "That jelly's rich, that malmsey's healing,
+ Pray dip your whiskers and your tail in."
+ Was ever such a happy swain?
+ He stuffs, and swills, and stuffs again.
+ "I'm quite ashamed--'Tis mighty rude
+ To eat so much; but all's so good!
+ I have a thousand thanks to give,
+ My lord alone knows how to live."--
+ No sooner said, but from the hall
+ Rush chaplain, butler, dogs, and all:
+ "A r--t, a r--t! clap to the door!"--
+
+I, however, made good my exit, and was nothing the worse of a
+practical warning to be more cautious in future.
+
+It would be endless for me to describe all my after voyages and
+travels. Suffice it to say, I have been both east and west, north
+and south; and there is scarcely a part of the habitable globe which
+I have not visited. After all, I have come to this conclusion, that
+there is no country like Britain. Oh! how I could wish my human
+existence had been in such happy times and under such glorious
+sovereigns as a George the Third, and George the Fourth!!!
+
+For some years I have remained in this country, enjoying (like a
+patriarch of old) a quiet, regular life with my family, which now
+amounts to above 2,000. I, however, keep very much to my own room,
+as I hate bustle, and like to enjoy my own reflections.
+
+The age to which our species can exist is not ascertained, as never
+one of us was known to die in his bed, at least a natural death. A
+kind of instinct I have always had, has as yet saved me from arsenic,
+stewed corks, traps, stamps, &c.; and my great strength, and a
+good deal of science, which is of more consequence, have, as yet,
+preserved me in many a deadly combat, both with my own species, and
+with the dog, the ferret, the weasel, the hawk, and that green-eyed
+monster--the cat. But I am now getting somewhat stiffer, and am not
+so sharp as I was. I am not--
+
+ "--qualis eram, quum primam aciem Præneste sub ipsa
+ Stravi, scutorumque incendi victor acervos;
+ Et regem hâc Herilum dextrâ sub Tartara misi!!"
+
+And in some evil hour my time must come.
+
+--I am well aware, indeed, of the fleeting existence even of this
+world itself, for I studied astronomy with the celebrated M. Olbers
+of Bremen, and assisted him in making many useful observations and
+discoveries, particularly regarding comets, in the course of which
+we came to this melancholy conclusion, that the comet which was
+afterwards visible in 1786 and 1795, will, in 83,000 years, approach
+the earth as nearly as the moon; and that in 4,000,000 years it
+will come to within a distance of 7,700 geographical miles;--the
+consequence of which will be (if its attraction be equal to that of
+the earth) the elevation of the waters of the ocean 13,000 feet; that
+is to say, above the tops of all the European mountains, except Mount
+Blanc. The inhabitants of the Andes and of the Himalaya mountains
+alone will escape this second deluge; but they will not benefit by
+their good fortune more than 216,000,000 years, for it is probable,
+that at the expiration of that time, our globe standing right in the
+way of the comet, will receive a shock severe enough to ensure its
+utter destruction!!!
+
+_Note._--After reading over the above MS., I am inclined to come to
+this conclusion--that our historian, while in a human form, must have
+been a Scottish nobleman--that he probably was born about the year
+1501--and that he lived to about the age of 89.--_Ed._
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE FANCY BALL.
+
+
+ "A visor for a visor! what care I
+ What curious eye doth quote deformities!"
+ SHAKSPEARE.
+
+ "You used to talk," said Miss Mac Call,
+ "Of flowers, and flames, and Cupid;
+ But now you never talk at all.
+ You're getting vastly stupid.
+ You'd better burn your Blackstone, Sir,
+ You never will get through it;
+ There's a Fancy Ball at Winchester--
+ Do let us take you to it."
+
+ I made that night a solemn vow,
+ To startle all beholders:
+ I wore white muslin on my brow,
+ Green velvet on my shoulders--
+ My trousers were supremely wide,
+ I learn'd to swear "by Allah"--
+ I stuck a poniard by my side,
+ And called myself "Abdallah."
+
+ Oh! a Fancy Ball's a strange affair,
+ Made up of silks and leathers,
+ Light heads, light heels, false hearts, false hair,
+ Pins, paint, and ostrich feathers:
+ The dullest Duke in all the town,
+ To-night may shine a droll one--
+ And rakes, who have not half-a-crown,
+ Look royal with a whole one.
+
+ Hail, blest Confusion! here are met
+ All tongues, and times, and faces,
+ The Lancers flirt with Juliet,
+ The Bramin talks of races;
+ And where's your genius, bright Corinne?
+ And where your brogue, Sir Lucius?
+ And Chinca Ti, you have not seen
+ One chapter of Confucius.
+
+ Lo! dandies from Kamschatka flirt
+ With beauties from the Wrekin--
+ And belles from Berne look very pert
+ On Mandarins from Pekin;
+ The Cardinal is here from Rome,
+ The Commandant from Seville--
+ And Hamlet's father from the tomb,
+ And Faustus from the Devil.
+
+ What mean those laughing Nuns, I pray,
+ What mean they, Nun or Fairy:
+ I guess they told no beads to-day,
+ And sang no Ave Mary.
+ From Mass and Matins, Priest and Pix,
+ Barred door, and window grated,
+ I wish all pretty Catholics
+ Were thus emancipated.
+
+ Four Seasons come to dance quadrilles,
+ With four well-seasoned sailors--
+ And Raleigh talks of rail-road bills,
+ With Timon, prince of railers.
+ I find Sir Charles of Aubyn Park
+ Equipp'd for a walk to Mecca--
+ And I run away from Joan of Arc,
+ To romp with sad Rebecca.
+
+ Fair Cleopatra's very plain,
+ Puck halts, and Ariel swaggers--
+ And Cæsar's murder'd o'er again,
+ Though not by Roman daggers.
+ Great Charlemagne is four feet high--
+ Sad Stuff has Bacon spoken--
+ Queen Mary's waist is all awry,
+ And Psyche's nose is broken.
+
+ Our happiest bride, how very odd!
+ Is the mourning Isabella,
+ And the heaviest foot that ever trod
+ Is the foot of Cinderella.
+ Here sad Calista laughs outright,
+ There Yorick looks most grave, Sir,
+ And a Templar waves the cross to-night,
+ Who never cross'd the wave, Sir.
+
+ And what a Babel is the talk!
+ "The Giraffe"--"plays the fiddle"--
+ "Macadam's roads"--"I hate this chalk"--
+ "Sweet girl"--"a charming riddle"--
+ "I'm nearly drunk with"--"Epsom salts"--
+ "Yes, separate beds"--"such cronies!"--
+ "Good heaven! who taught that man to valtz?"--
+ "A pair of Shetland ponies."
+
+ "Lord D----" "an enchanting shape"--
+ "Will move for"--"Maraschino"
+ "Pray, Julia, how's your mother's ape?"--
+ "He died at Navarino!"
+ "The gout, by Jove, is"--"apple pie"--
+ "Don Miguel"--"Tom the tinker"--
+ "His Lordship's pedigree's as high
+ As ----" "Whipcord, dam by Clinker."
+
+ "Love's shafts are weak"--"my chestnut kicks"--
+ "Heart broken;"--"broke the traces"--
+ "What say you now of politics?"--
+ "Change sides and to your places"--
+ "A five-barred gate"--"a precious pearl"
+ "Grave things may all be punn'd on!"--
+ "The Whigs, thank God, are"--"out of curl!"--
+ "Her age is"--"four by London!"
+
+ Thus run the giddy hours away,
+ Till morning's light is beaming,
+ And we must go to dream by day
+ All we to-night are dreaming;
+ To smile and sigh, to love and change--
+ Oh! in our heart's recesses,
+ We dress in fancies quite as strange
+ As these our fancy-dresses.
+
+_New Monthly Magazine_.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE GATHERER.
+
+ A snapper up of unconsidered trifles
+ SHAKSPEARE.
+
+ Tho' lang an lonely be the road
+ Between me an my dearie;
+ Yet I the gate hae aften troad,
+ When I've been tired and wearie.
+
+ Be't stormin rain, hail, win or snaw--
+ A lonely road and drearie--
+ There's nought wad e'er keep me awa
+ Frae gaun to see my dearie!!!
+
+M.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+FRENCH BALL CONVERSATION.
+
+During the French revolution, parties danced as gaily as ever; the
+following is a ball conversation, which took place in the month of
+Frimare, year 7.:--Well, the Ottoman Porte has declared war against
+us! Oh yes, there is no doubt of it, (_En avant deux_) It is an enemy
+the more--(_chassez_) and the Russian fleet they say has passed the
+Dardanelles, (_en avant quatre_) yet the papers say that the emperor
+sincerely desires peace.--Yes, but Count Metternich wishes for war,
+(_balancez_) so we have also a new coalition against us. England,
+Portugal, Naples, Turkey, the Emperor, Russia, perhaps the empire
+of Prussia, (_Faites face et chassez tous les huit_)--well we have
+bayonettes, (_la poussette_) besides it is not so far from Dover to
+Calais, (_traversez_)--Do you belong to the conscription?--Yes, and I
+too; (_pirouettez_) what makes me uneasy is to know what will become
+of our partners when we are gone: (_La chaine des dames_)--what will
+be left to amuse them (_La queu du chat_.) It was thus that days of
+terror were preceded by evenings of amusement and pleasure.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+INTUITIVE AFFECTION.
+
+"There are three things," said a wit, "which I have always loved
+without ever understanding them, painting, music, and woman."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+RETORT UNCOURTEOUS.
+
+A lady, well known in the fashionable vicinity of Portland-place,
+always accosts a stranger, with "I think I have seen you somewhere,"
+which often leads to a clue for her finding out the history of the
+party. One evening she played off the same game on a gentleman, who
+replied, "Most likely, madam, for I sometimes go there."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+With the present Number is published the SECOND SUPPLEMENT of
+the Spirit of the Annuals--containing Poetry and Prose by Allan
+Cunningham, Professor Wilson, the late P.B. Shelley, Miss Landon,
+Mrs. Hemans, Mr. Pringle, Theodore Hook, and other distinguished
+Writers--with a beautiful Engraving.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Purchasers of the MIRROR, who may wish to complete their sets are
+informed, that every volume is complete in itself, and may be
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+can be procured by giving an order to any Bookseller or Newsvender.
+
+Complete sets Vol. I. to XI. in boards, price £2. 19s. 6d. half bound,
+£3. 17s.
+
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+
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+
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+
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+
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+
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+
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+House,) London; sold by ERNEST FLEISCHER, 626, New Market, Leipsic;
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+*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 10719 ***
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+ .poem p.i8 {margin-left: 4em;}
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+<body>
+<div>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 10719 ***</div>
+<h1>The Project Gutenberg eBook, The Mirror of Literature, Amusement, and
+Instruction, Vol. 12, Issue 345, December 6, 1828, by Various</h1>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<span class="pagenum"><a id="page385" name="page385"></a>[pg
+385]</span>
+<h1>THE MIRROR<br />
+OF<br />
+LITERATURE, AMUSEMENT, AND INSTRUCTION.</h1>
+<hr class="full" />
+<table width="100%">
+<tr>
+<td align="left"><b>Vol. XII. No. 345.</b></td>
+<td align="center"><b>SATURDAY, DECEMBER 6, 1828.</b></td>
+<td align="right"><b>[PRICE 2d.</b></td>
+</tr>
+</table>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>The Arch of Constantine, at Rome.</h2>
+<div class="figure" style="width:100%;"><a href=
+"images/345-1.png"><img width="100%" src="images/345-1.png" alt=
+"" /></a></div>
+<p>"Still harping" on the Fine Arts&mdash;<i>Architecture</i> and
+<i>Painting</i>. Of the former, the above engraving is an
+illustration; and of the latter, our readers will find a beautiful
+subject (from one of <i>Turner's</i> pictures) in a <i>Supplement
+published with the present Number</i>.<a id="footnotetag1" name=
+"footnotetag1"></a><a href="#footnote1"><sup>1</sup></a></p>
+<p>The Arches of Rome were splendid monuments of triumph, erected
+in honour of her illustrious generals. They were at first very
+simple, being built of brick or hewn stone, and of a semicircular
+figure; but afterwards more magnificent, built of the finest
+marble, and of a square figure, with a large, arched gate in the
+middle, and two small ones on each side, adorned with columns and
+statues. In the vault of the middle gate, hung winged figures of
+victory, bearing crowns in their hands, which, when let down, they
+placed on the victor's head, when he passed in triumph.</p>
+<p>The <i>Arch of Constantine</i>, the most noble of all of these
+structures, subsists almost entire. It was erected by the senate
+and Roman people, in honour of Constantine, after his victory over
+Maxentius, and crosses the Appian Way, at <span class=
+"pagenum"><a name="page386" id="page386"></a>[pg 386]</span> the
+junction of the Coelian and Palatine Hills. Here it stands as the
+last monument of Roman triumph, or like the December sun of "the
+world's sole monument."</p>
+<p>This building consists of three arches, of which the centre is
+the largest; and has two fronts, each adorned with four columns of
+giallo antico marble, of the Corinthian order, and fluted,
+supporting a cornice, on which stand eight Dacian captives of
+Pavonazzetta, or violet-coloured marble.</p>
+<p>The inscription on both sides of the architrave imports, that it
+was dedicated "to the Emperor C&aelig;sar Flavius Constantine
+Augustus, the greatest, pious, and the happy; because by a divine
+impulse, the greatness of his courage, and the aid of his army, he
+avenged the republic by his just arms, and, at the same time,
+rescued it from the tyrant and his whole faction." On one side of
+the arch are the words, "Liberatori urbis," to the deliverer of the
+city; and on the other, "Fundatori quietis," to the founder of
+public tranquillity.</p>
+<p>Although erected to the honour of Constantine, this arch
+commemorates the victories of Trajan, some of the basso-relievos,
+&amp;c. having been pilfered from one of the arches of Trajan. This
+accounts for the Dacian captives, whose heads Lorenzo de Medicis
+broke off and conveyed to Florence, but the theft might not have
+been so notorious to posterity, had not the artists of
+Constantine's time added some figures of inferior merit. Forsyth
+says, "Constantine's reign was notorious for architectural
+robbery;" and the styles of the two emperors, in the present arch,
+mar the harmony by their unsightly contrasts.</p>
+<p>Although the decree for erecting this arch was, without doubt,
+passed immediately after the defeat of Maxentius, it appears from
+the monument itself, that the building was not finished and
+dedicated till the tenth year of Constantine's reign, or the year
+of Christ 315 or 316.</p>
+<p>The newly-erected arch opposite the entrance to Hyde Park is
+from the Roman arch, though, we believe, not from any particular
+model. In the View of the New Palace, St. James's Park, (in our No.
+278,) the arch, to be called the Waterloo Monument, and erected in
+the middle of the area of the palace, will be nearly a copy of that
+of Constantine at Rome. In the court-yard of the Tuilleries at
+Paris, there is a similar arch, copied from that of Septimius
+Severus. This was formerly surmounted by the celebrated group of
+the horses of St. Mark, pilfered from Venice, but restored at the
+peace of 1815.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>THE BEGGAR'S DAUGHTER OF BETHNAL GREEN.</h2>
+<h4><i>(For the Mirror.)</i></h4>
+<p>The popular ballad of "The Beggar's Daughter of Bednall-Greene"
+was written in the reign of Queen Elizabeth. It is founded, though
+without the least appearance of truth, or even probability, on a
+legend of the time of Henry III. Henry de Montfort, son of the
+ambitious Earl of Leicester, who was slain with his father at the
+memorable battle of Evesham, is the hero of the tale. He is
+supposed (according to the legend) to have been discovered among
+the bodies of the slain by a young lady, in an almost lifeless
+state, and deprived of sight by a wound, which he had received
+during the engagement. Under the fostering hand of this "faire
+damosel" he soon recovered, and afterwards marrying her, she became
+the mother of "the comelye and prettye Bessee." Fearing lest his
+rank and person should be discovered by his enemies, he disguised
+himself in the habit of a beggar, and took up his abode at
+Bethnal-Green. The beauty of his daughter attracted many suitors,
+and she was at length married to a noble knight, who, regardless of
+her supposed meanness and poverty, had the courage to make her his
+wife, her other lovers having deserted her on account of her low
+origin. Before entering, however, upon the ballad, it may not,
+perhaps, be thought irrelevant to give a brief sketch of the family
+of the De Montforts.</p>
+<p>Simon de Montfort, created Earl of Leicester by Henry III., was
+the younger son of Simon de Montfort, the renowned but cruel
+commander of the croisade against the Albigenses. This nobleman was
+greatly honoured by Henry III., to whose sister, the Countess
+Dowager of Pembroke, he paid his addresses, and was married, with
+the consent of her brother. For the favour thus shown him by his
+sovereign, he, however, proved ungrateful: his inordinate ambition,
+cloaked by a pretended zeal for reform, was the cause of those
+rebellions which, in the reign of Henry III., kept the kingdom in
+such a continued turmoil. The different oppressions and successes
+of the confederate barons, who at length got possession of the
+king's person, and the civil wars which ensued, are so well known
+as to render any remark on the subject superfluous; suffice it to
+say, that the disputes between the malcontents and the royal party
+were at length terminated by the battle of Evesham, which decided
+in favour of the latter. In this field fell the Earl of Leicester
+and his eldest son, Henry de Montfort. His death was followed by
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page387" id="page387"></a>[pg
+387]</span> the total ruin of his family; his titles and estates
+were all confiscated; the countess, his wife, who had been
+extremely active in her designs against the royalists, was
+banished, together with her sons, Simon and Guy, who afterwards
+assassinated their cousin, Henry d'Allmane, when he was
+endeavouring to effect a reconciliation between them and their
+uncle, Henry IV. The head of the earl was sent as a signal of the
+victory by Roger de Mortimer to the countess; but his body,
+together with that of his son Henry, was interred in the Abbey of
+Evesham; thus leaving the improbability of the legend without a
+shadow of doubt.</p>
+<p>As our limits will not allow us to quote the whole of the
+ballad,<a id="footnotetag2" name="footnotetag2"></a><a href=
+"#footnote2"><sup>2</sup></a> we must content ourselves with giving
+the song of the beggar, which, as well as being the most
+interesting, contains the whole of the legend concerning de
+Montfort:&mdash;</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>A poore beggar's daughter did dwell on a greene,</p>
+<p>Who for her fairnesse might well be a queene:</p>
+<p>A blithe bonny lasse, and a daintye was shee,</p>
+<p>And many one called her pretty Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Her father hee had noe goods nor noe land,</p>
+<p>But begg'd for a penny all day with his hand;</p>
+<p>And yett to her marriage he gave thousands three,</p>
+<p>And still he hath somewhat for pretty Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>And if any one here her birth doe disdaine,</p>
+<p>Her father is ready, with might and with maine,</p>
+<p>To prove shee is come of noble degree&mdash;</p>
+<p>Therefore, ever flout att prettye Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<hr class="short" /></div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Then give me leave, nobles and gentles, each one,</p>
+<p>One song more to sing, and then I have done;</p>
+<p>And if that itt may not winn good report,</p>
+<p>Then doe not give me a GROAT for my sport.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Sir Simon de Montfort my subject shall bee.</p>
+<p>Once chiefe of all the great barons was hee&mdash;</p>
+<p>Yet fortune so cruelle this lorde did abase,</p>
+<p>Now loste and forgotten are hee and his race.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>When the barons in armes did King Henrye oppose,</p>
+<p>Sir Simon de Montfort their leader they chose&mdash;</p>
+<p>A leader of courage undaunted was hee,</p>
+<p>And oft-times he made their enemyes flee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>At length in the battle on Eveshame plaine</p>
+<p>The barons were routed, and Montfort was slaine;</p>
+<p>Moste fatall that battel did prove unto thee,</p>
+<p>Thoughe thou wast not borne then, my prettye Bessee!</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Along with the nobles that fell at that tyde,</p>
+<p>His eldest son Henrye, who fought by his side,</p>
+<p>Was fellde by a blowe he receiv'de in the fighte!</p>
+<p>A blowe that depriv'de him for ever of sight.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Among the dead bodyes all lifelesse he laye,</p>
+<p>Till evening drewe on of the following daye,</p>
+<p>When by a yong ladye discover'd was hee&mdash;</p>
+<p>And this was thy mother, my prettye Bessee!</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>A baron's faire daughter stept forth in the nighte,</p>
+<p>To search for her father, who fell in the fight,</p>
+<p>And seeing yong Montfort, where gasping he laye,</p>
+<p>Was moved with pitye, and broughte him awaye.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>In secrette she nurst him, and swaged his paine,</p>
+<p>While he throughe the realme was beleev'd to be slaine:</p>
+<p>At lengthe his faire bride she consented to bee,</p>
+<p>And made him glad father of prettye Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>And nowe, lest oure foes our lives sholde betraye</p>
+<p>We clothed ourselves in beggars' arraye;</p>
+<p>Her jewells shee solde, and hither came wee&mdash;</p>
+<p>All our comfort and care was our prettye Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>And here have wee lived in fortunes despite,</p>
+<p>Thoughe poore, yet contented with humble delighte;</p>
+<p>Full forty winters thus have I beene</p>
+<p>A silly blind beggar of Bednall-greene.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>And here, noble lordes, is ended the song</p>
+<p>Of one that once to your owne ranke did belong:</p>
+<p>And thus have you learned a secrette from mee,</p>
+<p>That ne'er had beene knowne but for prettye Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>At Bethnal-Green is an old mansion, which, in the survey of
+1703, was called <i>Bethnal-Green-House</i>, and which the
+inhabitants, with their usual love of traditionary lore, assign as
+the "Palace of the Blind Beggar." This house was erected in the
+reign of Queen Elizabeth, by John Kirby, citizen of London, and
+was, says Stow,<a id="footnotetag3" name=
+"footnotetag3"></a><a href="#footnote3"><sup>3</sup></a> "lofty
+like a castle." It was afterwards the residence of Sir Hugh Platt,
+Knight, the author of many ingenious works; from him it came into
+the possession of Sir William Ryder, Knight, who died there in
+1669; of late years it has been used as a private madhouse. The
+tradition of the beggar is still preserved on the sign-posts of
+several of the public-houses in the neighbourhood.</p>
+<p>S.I.B.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>HISTORY AND ANTIQUITY OF WILLS.</h2>
+<h4>(<i>For the Mirror.</i>)</h4>
+<p>According to Blackstone, wills are of high antiquity. We find
+them among the ancient Hebrews; not to mention what Eusebius and
+others have related of Noah's testament, made in writing, and
+witnessed under his seal, by which he disposed of the whole world.
+A more authentic instance of the early use of testaments occurs in
+the sacred writings, (Genesis, chap. xlviii.) in which Jacob
+bequeaths to his son Joseph, a portion of his inheritance, double
+to that of his brethren.</p>
+<p>The Grecian practice concerning wills (says Potter) was not the
+same in all <span class="pagenum"><a name="page388" id=
+"page388"></a>[pg 388]</span> places; some states permitted men to
+dispose of their estates, others wholly deprived them of that
+privilege. We are told by Plutarch, that Solon is much commended
+for his law concerning wills; for before his time no man was
+allowed to make any, but all the wealth of deceased persons
+belonged to their families; but he permitted them to bestow it on
+whom they pleased, esteeming friendship a stronger tie than
+kindred, and affection than necessity, and thus put every man's
+estate in the disposal of the possessor; yet he allowed not all
+sorts of wills, but required the following conditions in all
+persons that made them:&mdash;</p>
+<p>1st. That they must be citizens of Athens, not slaves, or
+foreigners, for then their estates were confiscated for the public
+use.</p>
+<p>2nd. That they must be men who have arrived to twenty years of
+age, for women and men under that age were not permitted to dispose
+by will of more than one <i>medimn</i> of barley.</p>
+<p>3rd. That they must not be adopted; for when adopted persons
+died without issue, the estates they received by adoption returned
+to the relations of the men who adopted them.</p>
+<p>4th. That they should have no male children of their own, for
+then their estate belonged to these. If they had only daughters,
+the persons to whom the inheritance was bequeathed were obliged to
+marry them. Yet men were allowed to appoint heirs to succeed their
+children, in case these happened to die under twenty years of
+age.</p>
+<p>5th. That they should be in their right minds, because
+testaments extorted through the phrenzy of a disease, or dotage of
+old age, were not in reality the wills of the persons that made
+them.</p>
+<p>6th. That they should not be under imprisonment, or other
+constraint, their consent being then only forced, nor in justice to
+be reputed voluntary.</p>
+<p>7th. That they should not be induced to it by the charms and
+insinuations of a wife; for (says Plutarch) the wise lawgiver with
+good reason thought that no difference was to be put between deceit
+and necessity, flattery and compulsion, since both are equally
+powerful to persuade a man from reason.</p>
+<p>Wills were usually signed before several witnesses, who put
+seals to them for confirmation, then placed them in the hands of
+trustees, who were obliged to see them performed. At Athens, some
+of the magistrates were very often present at the making of wills.
+Sometimes the <i>archons</i> were also present. Sometimes the
+testator declared his will before sufficient witnesses, without
+committing it to writing. Thus Callias, fearing to be cut off by a
+wicked conspiracy, is said to have made an open declaration of his
+will before the popular assembly at Athens. There were several
+copies of wills in Diogenes Laertius, as those of Aristotle, Lycon,
+and Theophrastus; whence it appears they had a common form,
+beginning with a wish for life and health.</p>
+<p>The most ancient testaments among the Romans were made
+<i>viv&acirc; voce</i>, the testator declaring his will in the
+presence of seven witnesses; these they called <i>nuncupative</i>
+testaments; but the danger of trusting the will of the dead to the
+memory of the living soon abolished these; and all testaments were
+ordered to be in writing.</p>
+<p>The Romans were wont to set aside testaments, as being
+<i>inofficiosa</i>, deficient in natural duty, if they disinherited
+or totally passed by (without assigning a true and sufficient
+reason) any of the children of the testator. But if the child had
+any legacy, though ever so small, it was a proof that the testator
+had not lost his memory nor his reason, which otherwise the law
+presumed. Hence probably (says Blackstone) has arisen that
+groundless, vulgar error of the necessity of leaving the heir a
+shilling, or some other express legacy, in order to effectually
+disinherit him; whereas the law of England, though the heir, or
+next of kin, be totally omitted, admits no <i>querela
+inofficiosa</i>, to set aside such testament.</p>
+<p>Alfred the Great made a will, wherein he declared, in express
+terms, that it was just the English should be as free as their own
+thoughts.</p>
+<p>P.T.W.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>The Cosmopolite.</h2>
+<h3>DANCING.</h3>
+<h4><i>(For the Mirror.)</i></h4>
+<p>Dancing is defined to be "to move in measure; to move with steps
+correspondent to the sound of instruments." But there are other
+species of dancing&mdash;as</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;for
+three long months</p>
+<p>To <i>dance attendance</i> for a word of audience:</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>and to dance with pain, or when, as Lord Bacon says, "in
+pestilences, the malignity of the infecting vapour danceth the
+principal spirits." The <i>Chorea S. Viti</i>, or <i>St. Vitus's
+Dance</i> is another variation, said to have once prevailed
+extensively, and to have been cured by a prayer to this saint!
+whose martyrdom is commemorated on June 15. It may not be generally
+known that a person afflicted with this species of dancing can
+<i>run</i>, although he cannot walk or stand still. Another
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page389" id="page389"></a>[pg
+389]</span> and a more agreeable species is to <i>lead the
+dance</i>, an unjust usurpation which is practised in a thousand
+other places beside the ball-room.</p>
+<p>According to the mythologists, (authorities always quotable, and
+nobody knows why,) the Curetes or Corybantes, a people of Crete,
+who were <i>produced from rain</i>, first invented the dance to
+amuse the infant Jupiter&mdash;with what success he danced we know
+not, for when a year old he waged war against the Titans, and then
+his dancing days must have terminated.</p>
+<p>A history of dancing is, however, not to our purpose; but a few
+of its eccentricities. It occurs in the customs of all people,
+either as a recreation or as a religious ceremony&mdash;held in
+contempt by some, and in esteem by others. David danced before the
+ark; the daughters of Shiloh danced in a solemn yearly festival;
+and the Israelites, (good judges) danced round the golden calf.</p>
+<p>The ancients had a peculiar <i>penchant</i> for dancing, whether
+in person or by animals; and the feats of the latter distance all
+the wretched efforts of the bears, dogs, and horses of our days.
+The attempts of Galba to amuse the Roman people throw into the
+shade all the peace-rejoicings and illuminations of St. James's and
+the Green Parks. Suetonius, Seneca, and Pliny tell us of
+<i>elephants</i> in their time that were taught to walk the rope,
+backwards and forwards, up and down, with the agility of an Italian
+rope-dancer. Such was the confidence reposed in the docility and
+dexterity of the animal, that a person sat upon an elephant's back,
+while he walked across the theatre upon a rope, extended from the
+one side to the other. Lipsius, who has collected these
+testimonies, thinks them too strong to be doubted&mdash;perhaps
+even stronger than the rope. Scaliger corroborates all of them;
+Busbequius <i>saw</i> an elephant dance a <i>pas seul</i> at
+Constantinople; and Suetonius tells us of twelve elephants, six
+male and six female, who were clothed like men and women, and
+performed a country dance, in the reign of Tiberius. In later
+times, horses have been taught to dance. In the carousals of Louis
+XIII. there were dances of horses; and in the 13th century, some
+rode a horse upon a rope. All this eclipses the puny modern feats
+of Astley and Ducrow.<a id="footnotetag4" name=
+"footnotetag4"></a><a href="#footnote4"><sup>4</sup></a></p>
+<p>The Greeks and Romans were divided upon the propriety of
+dancing. Socrates who held death in contempt, when a reverend old
+gentleman, learned to dance of Aspasia, the beautiful nurse of
+Grecian eloquence. The Romans forgot their loss of the republic and
+of liberty&mdash;</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;the
+air we breathe</p>
+<p>If we have it not we die.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>in seeing Pylades and Bathyllus dance before them in their
+theatres&mdash;an indifference of which we were reminded on hearing
+that the Parisians sat in the <i>Caf&eacute;s</i> on the Boulevard
+du Italiens&mdash;sipping coffee and sucking down ice, during the
+capitulation of the city, and while the French, killed and wounded,
+were conveyed along the road before them.</p>
+<p>Cato, <i>Censorius</i>, danced at the age of fifty-six. Cicero,
+however, reproached a consul with having danced. Tiberius, that
+monster of indulgences, banished dancers from Rome; and Domitian,
+the illustrious fly-catcher, expelled several of his <i>members of
+parliament</i> for having danced. We are much more civilized, for
+such an edict as that of Domitian would clear our senate-houses as
+effectually as when Cromwell turned out the Long Parliament.</p>
+<p>Among the Italians and the French even there have been found
+enemies to dancing. Alfieri, the poet, had a great aversion to
+dancing; and one Daneau wrote a Trait&eacute; des Danses, in which
+he maintains that "the devil never invented a more effectual way
+than dancing, to fill the world with &mdash;&mdash;." The bishop of
+Noyon once presided at some deliberations respecting a minuet; and
+in 1770, a reverend prelate presented a document on dancing to the
+king of France. The Quakers consider dancing below the dignity of
+the Christian character; and an enthusiast, of another creed,
+thinks all lovers of the stage belong to the schools of Voltaire
+and Hume, and that dancing is a link in the chain of seduction.
+Stupid, leaden-heeled people, who constantly mope in melancholy,
+and neither enjoy nor impart pleasure, will naturally be enemies to
+dancing; and such we are induced to think the majority of these
+opponents.</p>
+<p>The French are inveterate dancers. They have their <i>bals
+par&eacute;s</i> and their <i>salons de danse</i> in every street;
+and as long as the weather will permit, they dance on platforms out
+of doors, and a heavy shower of rain will scarcely cool their
+ardour in the recreation. Some of their stage <i>figurantes</i>
+resemble aerial beings rather than bone and blood, for flesh may
+almost be left out of the composition. But the Italians are a
+nation of dancers as well as the children of song, and they seem to
+have followed the noble <span class="pagenum"><a name="page390" id=
+"page390"></a>[pg 390]</span> example of old Cato, in this respect,
+with better effect than they have studied his virtue. We are also
+told upon good authority, that the American dancers equal any of
+the European <i>figurantes</i>.</p>
+<p>The English people have always been lovers of dancing; and it
+forms an accompaniment of almost all their old sports and pastimes.
+Witness the maypoles, wassails, and wakes of rural life, and the
+grotesque morris-dance, originating in a kind of Pyrrhic or
+military dance, and described by Sir William Temple as composed of
+"ten men, who danced a maid marian and a tabor and pipe." In the
+time of Henry VII. dancers were remarkably well paid; for in some
+of his accounts in the Exchequer, we find</p>
+<pre>
+ &pound;. <i>s.</i> <i>d.</i>
+ Paid to a spye, in reward----------------- 2 0 0
+ To Pechie, the fool, in rewarde----------- 0 6 8
+ To Richard Beden, for writing of bokes---- 0 10 0
+ <i>To the young dameysell that daunceth</i>------ 30 0 0
+</pre>
+<p>In Shakspeare's time, to <i>dance</i> was an elegant
+accomplishment. Thus in the "Merry Wives of Windsor," "What say you
+to young Mr. Fenton? He capers, he <i>dances</i>, he has eyes of
+youth, he writes verses." Locke thus alludes to the graceful
+motions which dancing lends to the human frame: "the legs of the
+dancing-master, and the fingers of a musician, fall, as it were,
+naturally, without thought or pains, into regular and admirable
+motions."</p>
+<p>It must be somewhat surprising to those who over-rate the
+matter-of-fact character of the English people, that so great a
+majority of them are attached to <i>dancing</i>. Among rank and
+wealth this amusement admits of a finer display of beauty and
+artificial decoration than almost any other recreation; for nothing
+can be more splendid than a brilliantly illuminated and well-filled
+ball-room. Dancing among the middle classes of society is equally
+mirthful though not of so ostentatious a character, and it is a
+question whether the latter, being free from the alloy of
+fashionable follies, are not more exhilarated by sweet sounds than
+their wealthy superiors. But the mushroom aristocracy and pride of
+purse often operate as checks to the enjoyment of both these
+classes; and splendid dancing accommodations sometimes put an end
+to the amusement. At Dorking, in Surrey, attached to one of the
+inns is a ball-room, which cost the builder &pound;12,000, and here
+is one, or at most three balls during the year, while at scores of
+places within our recollection, of less consequence, there are
+monthly and even weekly balls; and we are inclined to think these
+periodical recreations of great importance to the happiness of
+country towns. But there is a species of intoxication sometimes
+arising from them&mdash;that of dancing all night, to suffer from
+exhaustion and rheumatism on the following day&mdash;an evil easy
+of remedy, by such amusements being more frequent and less
+protracted. The influence on the character of the people would
+probably be that of rendering it more even, from the admixture or
+reciprocation of pleasure and business being more proportional.
+This plan would get rid of much of the ostentation and expense of a
+country ball, and would ultimately prove the best antidote to the
+sins of scandal.</p>
+<p>As we have spoken of public dancing in the time of Henry VII.,
+we will show that the enormous sums paid to <i>artists</i> have
+nourished their conceit to an alarming height. Pitrot, the Vestris
+of his day, was a consummate specimen of this effrontery. At
+Vienna, he chose to appear only in the last act of the ballet. The
+emperor desired him to come forth at the end of the first; Pitrot
+refused; the court left the opera, and then Pitrot told the dancers
+they would have a hop by themselves, which they did. However, this
+was forgiven; and, at his departure, he was presented with the
+emperor's picture, set with brilliants. Pitrot received it with
+<i>sang froid</i>, pressed his thumb upon the crystal, crushed the
+picture to pieces, adding, "Thus I treat men not worthy of my
+friendship." This fellow behaved equally ill in France, Prussia,
+and Russia; but, at length, scouted by all his patrons, and, after
+giving his thousands to opera girls, he wandered about Calais in
+rags and poverty. Farinelli, after accumulating a fortune in
+England, built a superb mansion in Italy, which he called the
+<i>English Folly</i>.<a id="footnotetag5" name=
+"footnotetag5"></a><a href="#footnote5"><sup>5</sup></a></p>
+<p>The oddity of some ideas of dancing is really ludicrous. The
+Cambro-Britains, in a very late period, used to be played out of
+church by a fiddle, and to form a dance in the church-yard at the
+end of the service. But the ideas which the Chinese have of dancing
+exceeds all others. When Commodore Anson was at Canton, the
+officers of the <i>Centurion</i> had a ball upon some court
+holiday: while they were dancing, a Chinese, who very quietly
+surveyed the operation, said, softly, to one of the party, "Why
+don't you let your servants do this for you?"</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page391" id="page391"></a>[pg
+391]</span>
+<h2>Fine Arts.</h2>
+<h3>SCHOOL OF PAINTING AT THE BRITISH INSTITUTION.</h3>
+<h4><i>(To the Editor of the Mirror.)</i></h4>
+<p>I beg to present you with a brief notice of the School of
+Painting at the British Institution, Pall Mall; you may rely upon
+its correctness, as I have been extremely cautious in making my
+notes, and in ascertaining every particular relative to the
+subject.</p>
+<p>The students at this excellent institution have, for several
+weeks, been arduously engaged in copying the fine pictures which
+were entrusted to the directors by his majesty, and the nobility,
+for that purpose. In general, the students have been very
+successful, and deserve much praise; I must, however, in my
+prescribed limits, only mention a few.</p>
+<p>Vandyke's <i>Duchess de St. Croix</i> has been cleverly copied
+by Mr. Boden and Mr. Faulkner; the latter gentleman has well
+imitated the color and the beautiful finish of the original.
+Messrs. Frisk, Child, Howell and M'Call have likewise made clever
+copies of this <i>chef d'oeuvre</i> of art. Many bold efforts have
+been made to copy Hobbima's large <i>Landscape</i>; Mr. Laporte's
+is the most complete, though not quite spirited enough in the
+handling. <i>The Spanish Gentleman</i>, by Velasquez, has engaged
+the pencils of numerous artists, though they have not all been so
+successful as could have been wished; Messrs. Inskipp, Frisk,
+Morton and Child have produced the best <i>fac similes</i>. The
+<i>Lime Kiln</i>, by the younger Teniers, has been carefully
+studied by Mr. Gill, &amp;c.; and Messrs. M'Call and Morton, have
+executed the finest studies from <i>Innocent X.</i>, by Velasquez.
+<i>The Embarkation</i>, by Claude, is extremely well imitated in
+Mr. Cartwright's copy; and the <i>Virgin and Child</i>, which is
+one of Julio Romano's best works, has met with due attention from
+Mr. Farrier, and others. Mr. Novice has executed the only copy from
+DeHooge's fine picture&mdash;<i>A Dutch Family preparing for a
+Walk</i>; and Messrs. Foster and Earl display considerable talent
+in their copies from the <i>Landscape and Cattle</i>, by Cuyp.
+Other admirable works by Guido, Rubens, Bassan, Ruysdael,
+Vanderneer, and Canaletta, have met with a host of imitators, from
+whose talents we may anticipate, at no distant period, pictorial
+excellency of the first order. I should discover a want of
+gallantry, and, indeed, be most unjust, were I not to say that the
+ladies, in nearly all their undertakings, have exerted their utmost
+to excel; those especially, who have executed copies in water
+colours deserve the highest recommendation.</p>
+<p>G.W.N.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>The Anecdote Gallery.</h2>
+<h3>Thaxted Highwaymen.</h3>
+<h4><i>(For the Mirror.)</i></h4>
+<p>The following incident led to the breaking up and dispersion of
+a gang of desperate highwaymen, denominated the Thaxted gang, who
+about sixty years ago used to infest the roads in the neighbourhood
+of Dunmow, Thaxted, and the adjacent towns and villages:&mdash;</p>
+<p>An opulent farmer of Thaxted, being one day at Dunmow market,
+received a considerable sum of money, the produce of grain and
+other marketable articles, which he had that day disposed of; and
+going to the inn where he had left his horse, he ordered it to be
+saddled directly for the purpose of returning home. In those times
+every tradesman, salesman and a greater part of the publicans and
+innkeepers knew what money each other received on a market day. The
+innkeeper at whose house the farmer was in the habit of putting up
+at, said to him, "Why you are not going home to-night, are you,
+with all that money about you? You will stand a chance of getting a
+knock on the head."&mdash;"Let them knock away," answered the
+farmer. "I have never yet been robbed, nor do I think it likely I
+shall be to-night; so, Robert, get my horse ready," calling to the
+hostler. "Well, but have you any weapons of defence?" inquired the
+publican.&mdash;"No, nor none I want," responded the farmer. The
+innkeeper pressed him to take a pair of holster pistols; saying,
+"he might find them handy;" and after a great deal of persuasion,
+he agreed to take <i>one</i>, the publican first loading and
+charging it with ball. The farmer put the pistol in his great coat
+pocket, and was on the point of departure when he recollected that
+he had to get a pound of tea at a grocer's shop in the town, a few
+doors from the inn. He instantly ran to the shop for the tea, and
+while the grocer was serving him he made the same remark as the
+innkeeper had done respecting his going home with so considerable a
+sum as he knew the farmer had about him. The farmer made answer, "I
+am going home to-night, but our friend the publican, has lent me a
+pistol; and if any one interrupts me, I intend to blow his brains
+out."&mdash;"Do you know," said <span class="pagenum"><a name=
+"page392" id="page392"></a>[pg 392]</span> the grocer, "I do not
+like that fellow. Will you let me look at the pistol if you have it
+with you."&mdash;"O yes, look at it if you like. I never fired a
+pistol in my life; however, should I be stopped, I think I could
+manage it." The grocer took the pistol; drew the charge; and found,
+to the great surprise of the farmer, it was only loaded with
+horse-dung, and a large bullet at the top. "I thought he was a
+rascal, and this confirms it." said the grocer. "Here is evidently
+a plot; now leave your money with me; we will load this pistol
+properly, and you can, if you like, proceed on your journey: it may
+be the means of detecting some one."</p>
+<p>The farmer left his money in the hands of the grocer; went back
+to the inn; mounted his horse, and rode off on his journey. About a
+mile from Dunmow, he was stopped by a fellow, well mounted, who
+instantly demanded his money. "I have not got any," replied the
+farmer, "but I have a pistol, with which, if you do not instantly
+allow me to pass on my way home, I will blow your brains out." "You
+have got money&mdash;and as to the pistol, you may blow
+away&mdash;blow away, my fine fellow," said the chuckling
+highwayman. The farmer instantly fired, and his assailant fell off
+his horse to the ground with a groan. The farmer galloped back to
+the inn, and inquired of the hostler where his master was. "He has
+been gone out, on horseback, about a quarter of an hour," the
+hostler replied. "Well, I will tell you what," said the farmer,
+"you may find your master, with his brains blown out, in the road,"
+describing the place where he had had the encounter with the
+innkeeper.</p>
+<p>From this time a number of persons resident in and about Thaxted
+and Dunmow, left their places of abode, which circumstance created
+some surprise among the remaining inhabitants; but it was
+afterwards ascertained they formed the desperate gang that had so
+long and successfully robbed, and sometimes murdered, their
+unsuspecting neighbours and the different travellers who had
+occasion to pass the roads on which these marauders were
+stationed.</p>
+<p>J.W.B.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>Manners &amp; Customs of all Nations.</h2>
+<h4><i>(For the Mirror.)</i></h4>
+<h3>WISE MEN OF GOTHAM.</h3>
+<p>The village of Gotham, about seven miles from Nottingham, has
+been rendered noted by the common proverb of "The Wise Men of
+Gotham." It is observable that a custom has prevailed among many
+nations of stigmatizing the inhabitants of some particular spot as
+remarkable for stupidity. This opprobrious district among the
+Asiatics was Phrygia. Among the Thracians, Abdera; among the
+Greeks, Boeotia; in England it is Gotham. Of the Gothamites
+ironically called <i>The Wise Men of Gotham</i>, many ridiculous
+stories are traditionally told, particularly, that often having
+heard the cuckoo but never seen her, they hedged in a bush from
+whence her note seemed to proceed, so that being confined within so
+small a compass, they might at length satisfy their curiosity; and
+at a place called Court Hill, in this parish, is a bush called
+Cuckoo Bush.</p>
+<p>HALBERT H.</p>
+<hr />
+<h3>MALLARD NIGHT.</h3>
+<p>At All Souls' College, Oxford, the <i>Mallard Night</i> is
+celebrated annually on the 14th of January, in remembrance of a
+very singular circumstance, viz. the discovery of a live and
+excessively large mallard, or drake, supposed to have long ranged
+in a drain or sewer of considerable depth. The only probable
+conjecture respecting its extraordinary situation was, that it had
+fallen when young through the bars or grating at the entrance of
+the drain, (which was of sufficient width to receive it if very
+young,) but was found at a great distance from it, on digging for
+the foundation of the college, (A.D. 1437.) A very humorous account
+of this event was published some years ago by Dr. Buckler,
+subwarden, from a manuscript of Thomas Walsingham, the historian,
+and monk of St. Alban's. It is the cause of much mirth, for on the
+day, and in remembrance of the mallard, many an old and merry song
+is sung.</p>
+<p>E.T.S.</p>
+<hr />
+<h3>WELSH MARRIAGES.</h3>
+<p>It appears to me a matter of no small surprise that so
+economical a people as the English should not have adopted such a
+plan as the following by the lower classes of the Welsh. When a
+young couple intend offering themselves at the Temple of Hymen, if
+they are very poor, they generally send a man, called the bidder,
+round to their acquaintance and friends, who invites them,
+sometimes in rhyme, to the wedding; but if they can afford it, they
+issue circulars. The following is a copy of one:&mdash;</p>
+<p>"<i>June 27, 1827.</i></p>
+<p>"As we intend to enter the matrimonial state on Thursday, the
+19th day of July next, we are encouraged by our friends to make a
+bidding on the occasion, the same day, at the Butchers' Arms,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page393" id="page393"></a>[pg
+393]</span> Carmarthen, when and where the favour of your good and
+agreeable company is humbly solicited; and whatever donation you
+may be pleased to confer on us then, will be thankfully received,
+warmly acknowledged, and cheerfully repaid whenever called for on a
+similar occasion.</p>
+<p>"By your most obedient servants,</p>
+<p>"JOHN JONES.</p>
+<p>"MARY EVANS."</p>
+<p>The persons so invited (if they accept the invitation) generally
+form part of the procession to church, and are preceded by a harper
+or fiddler. After the nuptial knot is tied, they veer their course
+to the public-house mentioned in the bills, where they partake, not
+of a sumptuous banquet, but of the simple, though not the worst,
+fare of bread and cheese and kisses, at the expense of the new
+married folks. After this, a large plate is placed on the table in
+the room, and they proceed to receive the money which each person
+may be disposed to give, whilst one keeps account of the sum and
+names. They frequently receive 50<i>l.</i>, and sometimes, though
+seldom, 100<i>l.</i>; and they have the privilege (by paying the
+duty) of selling the ale to the persons assembled. It is to be
+observed, that the money so deposited cannot be reclaimed by the
+persons who gave it until a similar occasion presents itself in
+their family. By this means the new married couple are enabled to
+procure furniture, and other things requisite for them.</p>
+<p>W.H.</p>
+<hr />
+<h3>CURIOUS FOUNDATION.</h3>
+<p>At Spinney, in Cambridgeshire, was an abbey founded in the reign
+of Henry III. near which was a church, built by Lady Mary
+Bassingburne, and given to the Abbey of Spinney, on condition that
+the monks should support seven aged men with the following
+allowance, viz. one farthing loaf, one herring, and one pennyworth
+of ale per day, and two hundred dry turves, one pair of shoes, one
+woollen garment, and three ells of linen every year. Henry
+Cromwell, second son of Oliver Cromwell, is buried here.</p>
+<p>HALBERT H.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>THE SELECTOR,</h2>
+<h4>AND</h4>
+<h3>LITERARY NOTICES OF</h3>
+<h3><i>NEW WORKS</i></h3>
+<hr />
+<h2>ADVENTURES OF ALLAN-A-SOP.</h2>
+<h4><i>By Sir Walter Scott, Bart.</i></h4>
+<p>The chief of the clan, MacLean of Duart, in the Isle of Mull,
+had an intrigue with a beautiful young woman of his own clan, who
+bore a son to him. In consequence of the child's being, by some
+accident, born in a barn, he received the name of Allan-a-Sop, or
+Allan of the Straw, by which he was distinguished from others of
+his clan. As his father and mother were not married, Allan was of
+course a bastard or natural son, and had no inheritance to look
+for, save that which he might win for himself.</p>
+<p>But the beauty of the boy's mother having captivated a man of
+rank in the clan, called MacLean of Torloisk, he married her, and
+took her to reside with him at his castle of Torloisk, situated on
+the shores of the Sound, or small strait of the sea, which divides
+the smaller island of Ulva from that of Mull. Allan-a-Sop paid his
+mother frequent visits at her new residence, and she was naturally
+glad to see the poor boy, both from affection, and on account of
+his personal strength and beauty, which distinguished him above
+other youths of his age. But she was obliged to confer marks of her
+attachment on him as privately as she could, for Allan's visits
+were by no means so acceptable to her husband as to herself.
+Indeed, Torloisk liked so little to see the lad, that he determined
+to put some affront on him, which should prevent his returning to
+the castle for some time. An opportunity for executing his purpose
+soon occurred.</p>
+<p>The lady one morning, looking from the window, saw her son
+coming wandering down the hill, and hastened to put a girdle cake
+upon the fire, that he might have hot bread to his breakfast.
+Something called her out of the apartment after making this
+preparation, and her husband entering at the same time, saw at once
+what she had been about, and determined to give the boy such a
+reception as should disgust him for the future. He snatched the
+cake from the girdle, thrust it into his step-son's hands, which he
+forcibly closed on the scalding bread, saying, "Here,
+Allan&mdash;here is a cake which your mother has got ready for your
+breakfast." Allan's hands were severely burnt; and, being a
+sharp-witted and proud boy, he resented this mark of his
+step-father's ill-will, and came not again to Torloisk.</p>
+<p>At this time the western seas were covered with the vessels of
+pirates, who, not unlike the sea-kings of Denmark at an early
+period, sometimes settled and made conquests on the islands.
+Allan-a-Sop was young, strong, and brave to desperation. He entered
+as a mariner on board of one of these ships, and in process of time
+obtained the command, first of one galley, then of a small
+flotilla, with which he sailed round the seas and collected
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page394" id="page394"></a>[pg
+394]</span> considerable plunder, until his name became both feared
+and famous. At length he proposed to himself to pay a visit to his
+mother, whom he had not seen for many years; and setting sail for
+this purpose, he anchored one morning in the Sound of Ulva, and in
+front of the house of Torloisk. His mother was dead, but his
+stepfather, to whom he was now an object of fear as he had been
+formerly of aversion, hastened to the shore to receive his
+formidable son-in-law, with great affectation of kindness and
+interest in his prosperity; while Allan-a-Sop, who, though very
+rough and hasty, does not appear to have been sullen or vindictive,
+seemed to take his kind reception in good part.</p>
+<p>The crafty old man succeeded so well, as he thought, in securing
+Allan's friendship, and in obliterating all recollections of the
+former affront put on him, that he began to think it possible to
+employ him in executing his private revenge upon MacKinnon of Ulva,
+with whom, as was usual between such neighbours, he had some feud.
+With this purpose, he offered what he called the following good
+advice to his son-in-law:&mdash;"My dear Allan, you have now
+wandered over the seas long enough; it is time you should have some
+footing upon land, a castle to protect yourself in winter, a
+village and cattle for your men, and a harbour to lay up your
+galleys. Now, here is the island of Ulva, near at hand, which lies
+ready for your occupation, and it will cost you no trouble, save
+that of putting to death the present proprietor, the Laird of
+MacKinnon, a useless old carle, who has cumbered the world long
+enough."</p>
+<p>Allan-a-Sop thanked his stepfather for so happy a suggestion,
+which he declared he would put in execution forthwith. Accordingly,
+setting sail the next morning, he appeared before MacKinnon's house
+an hour before noon. The old chief of Ulva was much alarmed at the
+menacing apparition of so many galleys, and his anxiety was not
+lessened by the news, that they were commanded by the redoubted
+Allan-a-Sop. Having no effectual means of resistance, MacKinnon,
+who was a man of shrewd sense, saw no alternative save that of
+receiving the invaders, whatever might be their purpose, with all
+outward demonstrations of joy and satisfaction. He caused immediate
+preparations to be made for a banquet as splendid as circumstances
+admitted, hastened down to the shore to meet the rover, and
+welcomed him to Ulva with such an appearance of sincerity, that the
+pirate found it impossible to pick any quarrel which might afford a
+pretence for executing the violent purpose which he had been led to
+meditate.</p>
+<p>They feasted together the whole day; and in the evening, as
+Allan-a-Sop was about to retire to his ships, he thanked the Laird
+of MacKinnon for his entertainment, but remarked, with a sigh, that
+it had cost him very dear. "How can that be" said MacKinnon, "when
+I bestowed this entertainment upon you in free
+good-will?"&mdash;"It is true, my friend," replied the pirate, "but
+then it has quite disconcerted the purpose for which I came hither;
+which was to put you to death, my good friend, and seize upon your
+house and island, and so settle myself in the world. It would have
+been very convenient, this island, but your friendly reception has
+rendered it impossible for me to execute my purpose; so that I must
+be a wanderer on the seas for some time longer." Whatever MacKinnon
+felt at hearing that he had been so near to destruction, he took
+care to show no emotion save surprise, and replied to his
+visiter,&mdash;"My dear Allan, who was it that put into your mind
+so unkind a purpose towards your old friend; for I am sure it never
+arose from your own generous nature? It must have been your
+father-in-law, old Torloisk, who made such an indifferent husband
+to your mother, and such an unfriendly stepfather to you when you
+were a helpless boy; but now, when he sees you a bold and powerful
+leader, he desires to make a quarrel betwixt you and those who were
+the friends of your youth. If you consider this matter rightly,
+Allan, you will see that the estate and harbour of Torloisk lie as
+conveniently for you as those of Ulva, and that, if you are to make
+a settlement by force, it is much better it should be at the
+expense of the old churl, who never showed you kindness or
+countenance, than at that of a friend like me, who always loved and
+honoured you."</p>
+<p>Allan-a-Sop was struck with the justice of this reasoning; and
+the old offence of his scalded fingers was suddenly recalled to his
+mind. "It is very true what you say, MacKinnon," he replied, "and,
+besides, I have not forgotten what a hot breakfast my father-in-law
+treated me to one morning. Farewell for the present; you shall soon
+hear news of me from the other side of the Sound." Having said thus
+much, the pirate got on board, and commanding his men to unmoor the
+galleys, sailed back to Torloisk, and prepared to land in arms. His
+father-in-law hastened to meet him, in expectation to hear of the
+death of his enemy, MacKinnon. But Allan greeted him in a very
+different manner from what he expected. <span class=
+"pagenum"><a name="page395" id="page395"></a>[pg 395]</span> "You
+hoary old traitor," he said, "you instigated my simple good-nature
+to murder a better man than yourself. But have you forgotten how
+you scorched my fingers twenty years ago, with a burning cake? The
+day is come that that breakfast must be paid for." So saying, he
+dashed out his father-in-law's brains with a battle-axe, took
+possession of his castle and property, and established there a
+distinguished branch of the clan of MacLean.&mdash;<i>Tales of a
+Grandfather&mdash;Second Series.</i></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>ADVANTAGES OF A GOOD HEART,</h2>
+<h4><i>A Fragment from the "Disowned," by the author of
+"Pelham."</i></h4>
+<p>"The next day, Sir Christopher Findlater called on Clarence.
+'Let us lounge into the park,' said he. 'With pleasure,' replied
+Clarence; and into the park they lounged. By the way they met a
+crowd, who were hurrying a man to prison. The good-hearted Sir
+Christopher stopped&mdash;'Who is that poor fellow?' said he. 'It
+is the celebrated'&mdash;(in England all criminals are celebrated.
+Thurtell was a hero, Thistlewood a patriot, and Fauntleroy was
+discovered to be exactly like Bonaparte)&mdash;'it is the
+celebrated robber, John Jefferies, who broke into Mrs. Wilson's
+house, and cut the throats of herself and her husband, wounded the
+maid-servant, and split the child's skull with the poker.' * * *
+'John Jefferies!' exclaimed the baronet, 'let us come away.'
+'Linden,' continued Sir Christopher, 'that fellow was my servant
+once. He robbed me to some considerable extent. I caught him. He
+appealed to my heart, and you know, my dear fellow, that was
+irresistible, so I let him off. Who could have thought he would
+have turned out so?' And the baronet proceeded to eulogize his own
+good nature, by which it is just necessary to remark, that one
+miscreant had been saved for a few years from transportation in
+order to rob and murder <i>ad libitum</i>, and having fulfilled the
+office of a common pest, to suffer on the gallows at last. What a
+fine thing it is to have a good heart! Both our gentlemen now sunk
+into a reverie, from which they were awakened, at the entrance of
+the park, by a young man in rags, who, with a piteous tone,
+supplicated charity. Clarence, who to his honour be it spoken,
+spent an allotted and considerable part of his income in judicious
+and laborious benevolence, had read a little of political morals,
+then beginning to be understood, and walked on. The good-hearted
+baronet put his hand in his pocket, and gave the beggar
+half-a-guinea, by which a young, strong man, who had only just
+commenced the trade, was confirmed in his imposition for the rest
+of his life; and instead of the useful support, became the
+pernicious incumbrance of society. Sir Christopher had now
+recovered his spirits. 'What's like a good action?' said he to
+Clarence, with a swelling breast. The park was crowded to excess;
+our loungers were joined by Lord St. George. His lordship was a
+staunch Tory. He could not endure Wilkes, liberty, or general
+education. He launched out against the enlightenment of domestics.
+'What has made you so bitter?' said Sir Christopher. 'My valet!'
+cried Lord St. George; 'he has invented a new toasting-fork; is
+going to take out a patent, make his fortune, <i>and leave me</i>;
+that's what I call ingratitude, Sir Christopher; for I ordered his
+wages to be raised five pounds but last year.' 'It <i>was</i> very
+ungrateful,' said the ironical Clarence. 'Very!' reiterated the
+good-hearted Sir Christopher. 'You cannot recommend me a valet,
+Findlater,' renewed his lordship; 'a good, honest, sensible fellow,
+who can neither read nor write?' 'N&mdash;o&mdash;o&mdash;that is
+to say, yes! I can; my old servant, Collard, is out of place, and
+is as ignorant as&mdash;as&mdash;' 'I&mdash;or you are,' said Lord
+St. George, with a laugh. 'Precisely,' replied the baronet. 'Well,
+then, I take your recommendation: send him to me to-morrow at
+twelve.' 'I will,' said Sir Christopher. 'My dear Findlater,' cried
+Clarence, when Lord St. George was gone, 'did you not tell me some
+time ago, that Collard was a great rascal, and closely <i>lie</i>
+with Jefferies? and now you recommend him to Lord St. George!'
+'Hush, hush, hush!' said the baronet; 'he was a great rogue, to be
+sure; but poor fellow, he came to me yesterday with tears in his
+eyes, and said he should starve if I would not give him a
+character; so what could I do?' 'At least, tell Lord St. George the
+truth,' observed Clarence. 'But then Lord St. George would not take
+him!' rejoined the good-hearted Sir Christopher, with forcible
+<i>naivet&eacute;</i>. 'No, no, Linden, we must not be so
+hard-hearted; we must forgive and forget;' and so saying, the
+baronet threw out his chest, with the conscious exultation of a man
+who has uttered a noble sentiment. The moral of this little history
+is, that Lord St. George, having been pillaged 'through thick and
+thin,' as the proverb has it, for two years, at last missed a gold
+watch, and Monsieur Collard finished his career, as his exemplary
+tutor, Mr. John Jefferies, had <span class="pagenum"><a name=
+"page396" id="page396"></a>[pg 396]</span> done before him. Ah!
+what a fine thing it is to have a good heart. But, to return, just
+as our wanderers had arrived at the further end of the park, Lady
+Westborough and her daughter passed them. Clarence excusing himself
+to his friend, hastened towards them, and was soon occupied in
+saying the prettiest things in the world to the prettiest person,
+at least in his eyes; while Sir Christopher, having done as much
+mischief as a good heart well can do in a walk of an hour, returned
+home to write a long letter to his mother, against 'learning and
+all such nonsense, which only served to blunt the affections and
+harden the heart.' 'Admirable young man!' cried the mother, with
+tears in her eyes; 'a good heart is better than all the heads in
+the world.' Amen!"</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h3>SPIRIT OF THE</h3>
+<h2>Public Journals.</h2>
+<h3>QUADRANGLE OF KING'S COLLEGE, CAMBRIDGE.</h3>
+<p>In the last <i>New Monthly Magazine</i> is an excellent account
+of this splendid structure, in <i>A Day at Cambridge</i>,&mdash;in
+which occurs the following exquisite little descriptive
+gem:&mdash;</p>
+<p>With the exception of a gravel walk, running near to the
+buildings on every side, the whole ground-plot of this quadrangle
+is covered by an unbroken turf, kept, by means of constant and
+almost hourly attention, in that exquisite order which is only to
+be observed in spots devoted to similar purposes, here and at
+Oxford. The effect of an unbroken plot of turf of this kind and
+quality, and in a situation like this, is perfectly unique, and
+perhaps indescribable. It is supposed to be, and in fact is, for
+all purposes of preservation and beauty, sacred from the foot of
+man or beast; and the feeling arising from this circumstance, added
+to the exquisite natural adaptation of the object itself to the
+purposes of rest and relief from the almost dazzling architectural
+splendour of the surrounding objects, is such as cannot be
+communicated by any other means whatever, and we might in vain
+attempt to describe. It is of such a kind, however, that those who
+are capable of experiencing it, would as soon think of treading
+upon the object that conveys it to them, as those who honour Nature
+would think of rooting up a nest of violets. Speaking for ourselves
+alone, there is but one thing that can disturb and deteriorate the
+absolute tranquillity of mind, and peace of heart, which fall upon
+us, like dew from heaven, on entering a place like that we have
+attempted to describe above; it is, to see a capped and gowned
+Fellow, profaning with his footsteps the floor of that, in some
+sort, sacred temple, merely because he can, by so doing, reach his
+habitation by a few footsteps less than if he kept to the path
+allotted for him. We look upon the act as a species of impiety; to
+say nothing of its proving, to a demonstration, that the person who
+commits it is either utterly insensible to the mysterious harmony
+that subsists between a certain class of natural objects and the
+heart of man; or utterly disregards that harmony, and sets it at
+naught. He is, in fact, one of whom it may in one sense be said,
+that</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"He hath no music in his soul."</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>And we are almost tempted to complete the quotation, by
+adding&mdash;</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"Let no such man be trusted!"</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<hr />
+<h3>A RUSTIC PAIR.</h3>
+<h4><i>By Miss Mitford</i>.</h4>
+<p>Few damsels of twelve years old, generally a very pretty age,
+were less pretty that Hannah Bint. Short and stunted in her figure,
+thin in face, sharp in feature, with a muddled complexion, wild
+sun-burnt hair, and eyes, whose very brightness had in them
+something startling, over-informed, super-subtle, too clever for
+her age. At twelve years old she had quite the air of a little old
+fairy. Now, at seventeen, matters are mended. Her complexion has
+cleared; her countenance, her figure, has shot up into height and
+brightness, and a sort of rustic grace; her bright, acute eye is
+softened and sweetened by the womanly wish to please; her hair is
+trimmed, and curled, and brushed with exquisite neatness; and her
+whole dress arranged with that nice attention to the becoming, the
+suitable both in form and texture, which would be called the
+highest degree of coquetry, if it did not deserve the better name
+of propriety. Never was such a transmogrification beheld. The lass
+is really pretty, and Ned Miles has discovered that she is so.
+There he stands, the rogue, close at her aide, (for he hath joined
+her whilst we have been telling her little story, and the milking
+is over!)&mdash;there he stands&mdash;holding her milk-pail in one
+hand, and stroking Watch with the other; whilst she is returning
+the compliment, by patting Neptune's magnificent head. There they
+stand, as much like lovers as may be; he smiling, and she
+blushing&mdash;he never looking so handsome, nor she so pretty, in
+all their lives. There they stand, in <span class=
+"pagenum"><a name="page397" id="page397"></a>[pg 397]</span>
+blessed forgetfulness of all except each other&mdash;as happy a
+couple as ever trod the earth. There they stand, and one would not
+disturb them for all the milk and butter in Christendom. I should
+not wonder if they were fixing the wedding-day.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>RECOLLECTIONS OF A R*T.</h2>
+<h4><i>(Concluded from page 365.)</i></h4>
+<p>Finding a detachment just setting out to join the Grand Allied
+Army, I thought, as a true Briton, I could do no less than
+accompany it, and prevailed upon all our party to do the same.</p>
+<p>The detachment with which I marched, consisted of 80,000. As we
+had little baggage, having crossed the Rhine, we proceeded rapidly
+through a dull, uninteresting country.</p>
+<p>The town of Coblentz is situated at the junction of the Rhine
+and the Moselle. Here the majestic Rhine gently flows along in all
+its grandeur, separating the town from the noble fortress of
+Ehrenbreitstein.<a id="footnotetag6" name=
+"footnotetag6"></a><a href="#footnote6"><sup>6</sup></a> I crossed
+over the bridge of boats, and made a most minute inspection of this
+very romantic castle, which gave me great pleasure indeed. In a few
+days I availed myself of a passage-boat which was going to Mayence,
+and was quite enraptured with the view on all sides. Rhenish wines,
+and perhaps also the water, I found did not well agree with my
+stomach; and no inconsiderable annoyance, I soon experienced. They
+seemed, however, to have exactly the same effect upon every
+Englishman I saw, so I was not singular. A little brandy soon,
+however, put me all to rights; and by the time I reached
+Strasbourg, I was perfectly well again, and able to do ample
+justice to her Splendid Pies! I attended high mass in the great
+Cathedral of Strasbourg, and was surprised and pleased at the sight
+of 10,000 soldiers, in review order, drawn up within its walls. It
+was tiresome enough work mounting to the top of the spire, (which I
+ascertained, by the steps I took, to be exactly 490 feet high,
+Strasbourg measure; and this is exactly eight feet higher than St.
+Peter's at Rome), but I made it out, notwithstanding the sulky
+looks of the jackanapes who lives at the top. Nothing can surpass
+the beauty of the view from this cathedral. At your feet you have
+the ancient town, with all its regular fortifications and
+outworks&mdash;the majestic Rhine, with its bridge of boats, and
+ruined Gothic bridge, sublime in its decay&mdash;and as far as the
+eye can reach you have an exceedingly rich country, everywhere
+speckled with towns, and fertilized by luxuriant streams.</p>
+<p>I made a point of visiting my venerable friend, the old Comte de
+Strasbourg, who, unchanged in the rolling on of centuries, lies in
+his glass coffin, to all appearance in the same freshness of health
+and vigour in which, when myself a very young man, I saw him many
+hundred years ago;<a id="footnotetag7" name=
+"footnotetag7"></a><a href="#footnote7"><sup>7</sup></a> his
+countess, his son, and his daughter, keep him company, each in
+their separate place of repose. Alas, alas! the sight made me
+weep.</p>
+<p>A few days afterwards, I was rather unexpectedly stopped in my
+tour. For a night I had taken up my residence in the carriage of a
+young Englishman, who that day arrived from Rome, the hostler
+having assured me that he would remain for some time. I did so, as
+I found it much quieter and cooler than the hotel "La ville de
+Lyon," which was overcrowded. In the morning, I thought my friends
+were merely going a short drive, so I kept my seat. We, however,
+travelled on till night, when I heard we were bound for London; but
+as my companions were very agreeable, I thought I might as well
+accompany them the whole way. They seemed to be annoyed at every
+posthouse with their passports, &amp;c.; I was never even asked
+about the matter. The custom-house gentry, in their searches, to be
+sure, occasionally gave me a little trouble, but I was soon up to
+their tricks. We had an avant-courier constantly galloping before
+us, and we travelled with such expedition that we reached London in
+five days; for my fellow-travellers were idle young men of fortune,
+who are of course always in the greatest hurry for the end of a
+journey, because they don't know what to make of themselves when it
+is over.</p>
+<p>I had not then an opportunity of seeing Paris, as we only
+changed horses in it. I have since, however, spent many months
+there, and have always been very much pleased with every thing I
+saw, particularly the Catacombs, which were my favourite lounge.
+When last in Paris, I made a narrow escape with my life, as I
+tumbled headlong into a cask of brandy. I, however, managed to
+scramble out, with the assistance of a bit of cord, which happened
+to be hanging over its side, and which my friend pushed in to me. I
+was little the worse of my ducking; for, as soon as I got out, I
+was set a-laughing by his telling me how to spell <i>brandy</i>, in
+both French and English, in three letters, viz. "B.R. and Y." and
+"O.D.V."</p>
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page398" id="page398"></a>[pg
+398]</span>
+<p>In London I made a point, as a stranger, of going everywhere,
+and was certainly much delighted with every thing. I must confess,
+however, that I thought all the acting at the Opera and Theatres,
+and all the eloquence of the Houses of Parliament, as nothing in
+comparison of what I saw and tasted at the East India and London
+Docks. When I was in the House of Lords, a companion whispered to
+me, that he had heard an act read, offering a reward of
+10,000<i>l.</i> for a <i>male</i> tortoise-shell cat. This I
+believe, indeed, is a very safe offer, for such a thing was never
+heard of. And it is certainly as much worth their while as making
+an act that I should never have more than six dishes of meat at my
+dinner, or that I should not be buried in linen above twenty
+shillings Scots value per ell, although I wished it particularly,
+and could well afford to pay for it. There was, however, one
+restrictive act, which had sense in it; and the husbands of the
+present day would, I dare say, give their ears that it were still
+in force, whatever the dressmakers might think of it. But many of
+their acts of Parliament are silly enough&mdash;as they must be;
+for they don't like to be thought idle, and imagine that it is
+necessary to be always enacting something.</p>
+<p>It is curious, indeed, how fashion should be every thing in the
+great city. A lady could not possibly venture to see her dearest
+friend on earth, or even her own sister, if she happened to live in
+rather an unfashionable part of the town. By so doing, she would
+expose herself to her own footmen, who very properly would lose all
+respect for her, and I suppose instantly leave her service, as,
+poor fellows, they have a rank in life to keep up!! John Bull
+certainly gives himself many airs, to say the least of it. After
+receiving the greatest kindness and hospitality from you in
+Scotland, and perhaps staying for months in your house, he will cut
+you dead in London. I remember once meeting with such a return, but
+took it, of course, very coolly. Next day, when I was arm in arm
+with &mdash;&mdash; &mdash;&mdash;, I happened again to meet my
+quondam friend, who immediately rushed up to me&mdash;I, however,
+turned on my tail, and did not know him.&mdash;Fashion is an odd
+thing after all. It is not rank which will do. I have seen many a
+spendthrift young commoner cut his uncle the duke; and being a
+duchess by no means will ensure admittance at Almack's.&mdash;I
+thank my stars, I am not fashionable, and am always happy to see my
+friends!</p>
+<p>I was persuaded, soon after reaching London, to go down to Essex
+for a few days, to pay a visit to an old friend. When I arrived at
+his house, which I think they called Waltham Abbey, I was sorry to
+receive the melancholy accounts that he had been devoured, and
+that, if I did not instantly take myself off, I should be dealt
+with in the same manner. The truth was, that a famine had arisen;
+and it is well known, on those occasions, as necessity has no law,
+that the stronger kills the weaker. Day after day the combat is
+renewed, till at last all except one are destroyed, and he is then
+obliged to decamp, or eat himself up, as he likes best. It is in
+this way that castles, houses, &amp;c. which have been long
+infested by us, are so suddenly entirely freed from our
+presence.</p>
+<p>I amused myself in making an excursion to Epping Forest, till I
+thought the civil war at my late friend's habitation might have
+proceeded far enough for my presence to be useful. In the forest,
+one day, I had the luck to kill one of those troublesome
+reptiles&mdash;a Tom Cat. I believe, however, it was a house one.
+After a hard day's hunting his highness made too free at a Valerian
+party. I watched my opportunity, and soon put an effectual end to
+his caterwauling. When I returned to the abbey, I found I was in
+the best possible time&mdash;the garrison being reduced to about a
+dozen, and they so weakened and tired out with the constant
+worrying work they had had, that I was myself a complete match for
+any two of them. In a few days the number was only four, and in
+other two days I was sole lord and master.</p>
+<p>[He then returns to town.]</p>
+<p>At a friend's house, in Berkeley Square, where I met a
+distinguished party, a scene took place, just such as Pope
+describes&mdash;</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Our courtier walks from dish to dish;</p>
+<p>Tastes, for his friend, of fowl and fish:</p>
+<p>"That jelly's rich, that malmsey's healing,</p>
+<p>Pray dip your whiskers and your tail in."</p>
+<p>Was ever such a happy swain?</p>
+<p>He stuffs, and swills, and stuffs again.</p>
+<p>"I'm quite ashamed&mdash;'Tis mighty rude</p>
+<p>To eat so much; but all's so good!</p>
+<p>I have a thousand thanks to give,</p>
+<p>My lord alone knows how to live."&mdash;</p>
+<p>No sooner said, but from the hall</p>
+<p>Rush chaplain, butler, dogs, and all:</p>
+<p>"A r&mdash;t, a r&mdash;t! clap to the door!"&mdash;</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>I, however, made good my exit, and was nothing the worse of a
+practical warning to be more cautious in future.</p>
+<p>It would be endless for me to describe all my after voyages and
+travels. Suffice it to say, I have been both east and west, north
+and south; and there is scarcely a part of the habitable globe
+which I have not visited. After all, I have come to this
+conclusion, that there is no country like Britain. Oh! how I could
+wish my human existence had been in such happy <span class=
+"pagenum"><a name="page399" id="page399"></a>[pg 399]</span> times
+and under such glorious sovereigns as a George the Third, and
+George the Fourth!!!</p>
+<p>For some years I have remained in this country, enjoying (like a
+patriarch of old) a quiet, regular life with my family, which now
+amounts to above 2,000. I, however, keep very much to my own room,
+as I hate bustle, and like to enjoy my own reflections.</p>
+<p>The age to which our species can exist is not ascertained, as
+never one of us was known to die in his bed, at least a natural
+death. A kind of instinct I have always had, has as yet saved me
+from arsenic, stewed corks, traps, stamps, &amp;c.; and my great
+strength, and a good deal of science, which is of more consequence,
+have, as yet, preserved me in many a deadly combat, both with my
+own species, and with the dog, the ferret, the weasel, the hawk,
+and that green-eyed monster&mdash;the cat. But I am now getting
+somewhat stiffer, and am not so sharp as I was. I am not&mdash;</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"&mdash;&mdash;qualis eram, quum primam aciem Pr&aelig;neste sub
+ipsa</p>
+<p>Stravi, scutorumque incendi victor acervos;</p>
+<p>Et regem h&acirc;c Herilum dextr&acirc; sub Tartara misi!!"</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>And in some evil hour my time must come.</p>
+<p>&mdash;I am well aware, indeed, of the fleeting existence even
+of this world itself, for I studied astronomy with the celebrated
+M. Olbers of Bremen, and assisted him in making many useful
+observations and discoveries, particularly regarding comets, in the
+course of which we came to this melancholy conclusion, that the
+comet which was afterwards visible in 1786 and 1795, will, in
+83,000 years, approach the earth as nearly as the moon; and that in
+4,000,000 years it will come to within a distance of 7,700
+geographical miles;&mdash;the consequence of which will be (if its
+attraction be equal to that of the earth) the elevation of the
+waters of the ocean 13,000 feet; that is to say, above the tops of
+all the European mountains, except Mount Blanc. The inhabitants of
+the Andes and of the Himalaya mountains alone will escape this
+second deluge; but they will not benefit by their good fortune more
+than 216,000,000 years, for it is probable, that at the expiration
+of that time, our globe standing right in the way of the comet,
+will receive a shock severe enough to ensure its utter
+destruction!!!</p>
+<p><i>Note.</i>&mdash;After reading over the above MS., I am
+inclined to come to this conclusion&mdash;that our historian, while
+in a human form, must have been a Scottish nobleman&mdash;that he
+probably was born about the year 1501&mdash;and that he lived to
+about the age of 89.&mdash;<i>Ed.</i></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>THE FANCY BALL.</h2>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"A visor for a visor! what care I</p>
+<p>What curious eye doth quote deformities!"</p>
+<p class="i10">SHAKSPEARE.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"You used to talk," said Miss Mac Call,</p>
+<p class="i2">"Of flowers, and flames, and Cupid;</p>
+<p>But now you never talk at all.</p>
+<p class="i2">You're getting vastly stupid.</p>
+<p>You'd better burn your Blackstone, Sir,</p>
+<p class="i2">You never will get through it;</p>
+<p>There's a Fancy Ball at Winchester&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">Do let us take you to it."</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>I made that night a solemn vow,</p>
+<p class="i2">To startle all beholders:</p>
+<p>I wore white muslin on my brow,</p>
+<p class="i2">Green velvet on my shoulders&mdash;</p>
+<p>My trousers were supremely wide,</p>
+<p class="i2">I learn'd to swear "by Allah"&mdash;</p>
+<p>I stuck a poniard by my side,</p>
+<p class="i2">And called myself "Abdallah."</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Oh! a Fancy Ball's a strange affair,</p>
+<p class="i2">Made up of silks and leathers,</p>
+<p>Light heads, light heels, false hearts, false hair,</p>
+<p class="i2">Pins, paint, and ostrich feathers:</p>
+<p>The dullest Duke in all the town,</p>
+<p class="i2">To-night may shine a droll one&mdash;</p>
+<p>And rakes, who have not half-a-crown,</p>
+<p class="i2">Look royal with a whole one.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Hail, blest Confusion! here are met</p>
+<p class="i2">All tongues, and times, and faces,</p>
+<p>The Lancers flirt with Juliet,</p>
+<p class="i2">The Bramin talks of races;</p>
+<p>And where's your genius, bright Corinne?</p>
+<p class="i2">And where your brogue, Sir Lucius?</p>
+<p>And Chinca Ti, you have not seen</p>
+<p class="i2">One chapter of Confucius.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Lo! dandies from Kamschatka flirt</p>
+<p class="i2">With beauties from the Wrekin&mdash;</p>
+<p>And belles from Berne look very pert</p>
+<p class="i2">On Mandarins from Pekin;</p>
+<p>The Cardinal is here from Rome,</p>
+<p class="i2">The Commandant from Seville&mdash;</p>
+<p>And Hamlet's father from the tomb,</p>
+<p class="i2">And Faustus from the Devil.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>What mean those laughing Nuns, I pray,</p>
+<p class="i2">What mean they, Nun or Fairy:</p>
+<p>I guess they told no beads to-day,</p>
+<p class="i2">And sang no Ave Mary.</p>
+<p>From Mass and Matins, Priest and Pix,</p>
+<p class="i2">Barred door, and window grated,</p>
+<p>I wish all pretty Catholics</p>
+<p class="i2">Were thus emancipated.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Four Seasons come to dance quadrilles,</p>
+<p class="i2">With four well-seasoned sailors&mdash;</p>
+<p>And Raleigh talks of rail-road bills,</p>
+<p class="i2">With Timon, prince of railers.</p>
+<p>I find Sir Charles of Aubyn Park</p>
+<p class="i2">Equipp'd for a walk to Mecca&mdash;</p>
+<p>And I run away from Joan of Arc,</p>
+<p class="i2">To romp with sad Rebecca.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Fair Cleopatra's very plain,</p>
+<p class="i2">Puck halts, and Ariel swaggers&mdash;</p>
+<p>And C&aelig;sar's murder'd o'er again,</p>
+<p class="i2">Though not by Roman daggers.</p>
+<p>Great Charlemagne is four feet high&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">Sad Stuff has Bacon spoken&mdash;</p>
+<p>Queen Mary's waist is all awry,</p>
+<p class="i2">And Psyche's nose is broken.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Our happiest bride, how very odd!</p>
+<p class="i2">Is the mourning Isabella,</p>
+<p>And the heaviest foot that ever trod</p>
+<p class="i2">Is the foot of Cinderella.</p>
+<p>Here sad Calista laughs outright,</p>
+<p class="i2">There Yorick looks most grave, Sir,</p>
+<p>And a Templar waves the cross to-night,</p>
+<p class="i2">Who never cross'd the wave, Sir.</p>
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page400" id="page400"></a>[pg
+400]</span></div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>And what a Babel is the talk!</p>
+<p class="i2">"The Giraffe"&mdash;"plays the fiddle"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"Macadam's roads"&mdash;"I hate this chalk"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Sweet girl"&mdash;"a charming riddle"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"I'm nearly drunk with"&mdash;"Epsom salts"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Yes, separate beds"&mdash;"such cronies!"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"Good heaven! who taught that man to valtz?"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"A pair of Shetland ponies."</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"Lord D&mdash;&mdash;" "an enchanting shape"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Will move for"&mdash;"Maraschino"</p>
+<p>"Pray, Julia, how's your mother's ape?"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"He died at Navarino!"</p>
+<p>"The gout, by Jove, is"&mdash;"apple pie"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Don Miguel"&mdash;"Tom the tinker"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"His Lordship's pedigree's as high</p>
+<p class="i2">As &mdash;&mdash;" "Whipcord, dam by Clinker."</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"Love's shafts are weak"&mdash;"my chestnut kicks"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Heart broken;"&mdash;"broke the traces"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"What say you now of politics?"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Change sides and to your places"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"A five-barred gate"&mdash;"a precious pearl"</p>
+<p class="i2">"Grave things may all be punn'd on!"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"The Whigs, thank God, are"&mdash;"out of curl!"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Her age is"&mdash;"four by London!"</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Thus run the giddy hours away,</p>
+<p class="i2">Till morning's light is beaming,</p>
+<p>And we must go to dream by day</p>
+<p class="i2">All we to-night are dreaming;</p>
+<p>To smile and sigh, to love and change&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">Oh! in our heart's recesses,</p>
+<p>We dress in fancies quite as strange</p>
+<p class="i2">As these our fancy-dresses.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p><i>New Monthly Magazine</i>.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>The Gatherer.</h2>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>A snapper up of unconsidered trifles</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p class="i10">SHAKSPEARE.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Tho' lang an lonely be the road</p>
+<p class="i2">Between me an my dearie;</p>
+<p>Yet I the gate hae aften troad,</p>
+<p class="i2">When I've been tired and wearie.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Be't stormin rain, hail, win or snaw&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">A lonely road and drearie&mdash;</p>
+<p>There's nought wad e'er keep me awa</p>
+<p class="i2">Frae gaun to see my dearie!!!</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>M.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<hr />
+<h3>FRENCH BALL CONVERSATION.</h3>
+<p>During the French revolution, parties danced as gaily as ever;
+the following is a ball conversation, which took place in the month
+of Frimare, year 7.:&mdash;Well, the Ottoman Porte has declared war
+against us! Oh yes, there is no doubt of it, (<i>En avant deux</i>)
+It is an enemy the more&mdash;(<i>chassez</i>) and the Russian
+fleet they say has passed the Dardanelles, (<i>en avant quatre</i>)
+yet the papers say that the emperor sincerely desires
+peace.&mdash;Yes, but Count Metternich wishes for war,
+(<i>balancez</i>) so we have also a new coalition against us.
+England, Portugal, Naples, Turkey, the Emperor, Russia, perhaps the
+empire of Prussia, (<i>Faites face et chassez tous les
+huit</i>)&mdash;well we have bayonettes, (<i>la poussette</i>)
+besides it is not so far from Dover to Calais,
+(<i>traversez</i>)&mdash;Do you belong to the
+conscription?&mdash;Yes, and I too; (<i>pirouettez</i>) what makes
+me uneasy is to know what will become of our partners when we are
+gone: (<i>La chaine des dames</i>)&mdash;what will be left to amuse
+them (<i>La queu du chat</i>.) It was thus that days of terror were
+preceded by evenings of amusement and pleasure.</p>
+<hr />
+<h3>INTUITIVE AFFECTION.</h3>
+<p>"There are three things," said a wit, "which I have always loved
+without ever understanding them, painting, music, and woman."</p>
+<hr />
+<h3>RETORT UNCOURTEOUS.</h3>
+<p>A lady, well known in the fashionable vicinity of
+Portland-place, always accosts a stranger, with "I think I have
+seen you somewhere," which often leads to a clue for her finding
+out the history of the party. One evening she played off the same
+game on a gentleman, who replied, "Most likely, madam, for I
+sometimes go there."</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>With the present Number is published the SECOND SUPPLEMENT of
+the Spirit of the Annuals&mdash;containing Poetry and Prose by
+Allan Cunningham, Professor Wilson, the late P.B. Shelley, Miss
+Landon, Mrs. Hemans, Mr. Pringle, Theodore Hook, and other
+distinguished Writers&mdash;with a beautiful Engraving.</p>
+<hr />
+<p>Purchasers of the MIRROR, who may wish to complete their sets
+are informed, that every volume is complete in itself, and may be
+purchased separately. The whole of the numbers are now in print,
+and can be procured by giving an order to any Bookseller or
+Newsvender.</p>
+<p>Complete sets Vol. I. to XI. in boards, price &pound;2.
+19<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i> half bound, &pound;3. 17<i>s.</i></p>
+<hr />
+<h4><i>LIMBIRD'S EDITIONS.</i></h4>
+<p>CHEAP and POPULAR WORKS published at the MIRROR OFFICE in the
+Strand, near Somerset House.</p>
+<p>The ARABIAN NIGHTS' ENTERTAINMENTS, Embellished with nearly 150
+Engravings. Price 6<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i> boards.</p>
+<p>The TALES of the GENII. Price 2<i>s.</i></p>
+<p>The MICROCOSM. By the Right Hon. G. CANNING, &amp;c. Price
+2<i>s.</i></p>
+<p>PLUTARCH'S LIVES, with Fifty Portraits, 2 vols. price
+13<i>s.</i> boards.</p>
+<p>COWPER'S POEMS, with 12 Engravings, price 3<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i>
+boards.</p>
+<p>COOK'S VOYAGES, 2 vols. price 8<i>s.</i> boards.</p>
+<p>The CABINET of CURIOSITIES: or WONDERS of the WORLD DISPLAYED
+Price 5<i>s.</i> boards.</p>
+<p>BEAUTIES of SCOTT. 2 vols. price 7<i>s.</i> boards.</p>
+<p>The ARCANA of SCIENCE for 1828. Price 4<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i></p>
+<p>*** Any of the above Works can be purchased in Parts.</p>
+<p>GOLDSMITH'S ESSAYS. Price 8<i>d.</i></p>
+<p>DR. FRANKLIN'S ESSAYS. Price 1<i>s.</i> 2<i>d.</i></p>
+<p>BACON'S ESSAYS. Price 8<i>d.</i></p>
+<p>SALMAGUNDI. Price 1<i>s.</i> 8<i>d.</i></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote1" name=
+"footnote1"></a><b>Footnote 1:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag1">(return)</a>
+<p>The Second of "the Spirit of the Annuals," containing a fine
+Engraving, after a celebrated picture by Turner, and a string of
+POETICAL GEMS from the Anniversary, Keepsake, and Friendship's
+Offering, with unique extracts from such of "the Annuals" as were
+not noticed in the previous Supplement.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote2" name=
+"footnote2"></a><b>Footnote 2:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag2">(return)</a>
+<p>Vide Percy's "Reliques," vol. ii. p. 178.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote3" name=
+"footnote3"></a><b>Footnote 3:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag3">(return)</a>
+<p>Strype's Stowe, vol. ii. p. 47, edit. 1755.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote4" name=
+"footnote4"></a><b>Footnote 4:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag4">(return)</a>
+<p>Miraculous dancing is not, however, confined to animals; for
+William of Malmesbury gravely relates an instance of 15 young women
+and 18 young men who (by the anathema of a priest) continued
+dancing a whole year, and wore the earth so much, that, by degrees,
+they sunk midway into the earth!</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote5" name=
+"footnote5"></a><b>Footnote 5:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag5">(return)</a>
+<p>Here is a card "extraordinary" of one of our humble English
+dancing-masters:&mdash;"As Dancing is the poetry of motion, those
+who wish to sail through the mazes of harmony, or to 'trip it on
+the light fantastic toe,' will find an able guide in John Wilde,
+who was formed by nature for a dancing-master.&mdash;N.B. Those who
+have been taught to dance with <i>a couple of left legs</i>, had
+better apply in time, as he effectually cures all bad habits of the
+kind."</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote6" name=
+"footnote6"></a><b>Footnote 6:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag6">(return)</a>
+<p>Apropos&mdash;our <i>Supplement</i> contains a fine Engraving of
+this very spot.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote7" name=
+"footnote7"></a><b>Footnote 7:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag7">(return)</a>
+<p>The venerable count died about the year 1519. The glass coffins
+are still shown.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><i>Printed and Published by J. LIMBIRD, 143, Strand, (near
+Somerset House,) London; sold by ERNEST FLEISCHER, 626, New Market,
+Leipsic; and by all Newsmen and Booksellers.</i></p>
+<div>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 10719 ***</div>
+</body>
+</html>
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+This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements,
+metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be
+in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES.
+
+Procedures for determining public domain status are described in
+the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org.
+
+No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in
+jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize
+this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright
+status under the laws that apply to them.
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #10719 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/10719)
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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, The Mirror of Literature, Amusement, and
+Instruction, Vol. 12, Issue 345, December 6, 1828, by Various
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+Title: The Mirror of Literature, Amusement, and Instruction, Vol. 12,
+Issue 345, December 6, 1828
+
+Author: Various
+
+Release Date: January 14, 2004 [eBook #10719]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: iso-8859-1
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MIRROR OF LITERATURE,
+AMUSEMENT, AND INSTRUCTION, VOL. 12, ISSUE 345, DECEMBER 6, 1828***
+
+
+E-text prepared by Jonathan Ingram, William Flis, and Project Gutenberg
+Distributed Proofreaders
+
+
+
+Note: Project Gutenberg also has an HTML version of this
+ file which includes the original illustration.
+ See 10719-h.htm or 10719-h.zip:
+ (http://www.ibiblio.org/gutenberg/1/0/7/1/10719/10719-h/10719-h.htm)
+ or
+ (http://www.ibiblio.org/gutenberg/1/0/7/1/10719/10719-h.zip)
+
+
+
+
+THE MIRROR OF LITERATURE, AMUSEMENT, AND INSTRUCTION.
+
+VOL. 12, No. 349.] SATURDAY, DECEMBER 6, 1828. [PRICE 2d.
+
+
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+
+THE ARCH OF CONSTANTINE, AT ROME.
+
+[Illustration: The Arch of Constantine, at Rome.]
+
+"Still harping" on the Fine Arts--_Architecture_ and _Painting_. Of
+the former, the above engraving is an illustration; and of the latter,
+our readers will find a beautiful subject (from one of _Turner's_
+pictures) in a _Supplement published with the present Number_.[1]
+
+ [1] The Second of "the Spirit of the Annuals," containing a fine
+ Engraving, after a celebrated picture by Turner, and a string of
+ POETICAL GEMS from the Anniversary, Keepsake, and Friendship's
+ Offering, with unique extracts from such of "the Annuals" as were
+ not noticed in the previous Supplement.
+
+The Arches of Rome were splendid monuments of triumph, erected in
+honour of her illustrious generals. They were at first very simple,
+being built of brick or hewn stone, and of a semicircular figure; but
+afterwards more magnificent, built of the finest marble, and of a
+square figure, with a large, arched gate in the middle, and two small
+ones on each side, adorned with columns and statues. In the vault of
+the middle gate, hung winged figures of victory, bearing crowns in
+their hands, which, when let down, they placed on the victor's head,
+when he passed in triumph.
+
+The _Arch of Constantine_, the most noble of all of these structures,
+subsists almost entire. It was erected by the senate and Roman people,
+in honour of Constantine, after his victory over Maxentius, and
+crosses the Appian Way, at the junction of the Coelian and Palatine
+Hills. Here it stands as the last monument of Roman triumph, or like
+the December sun of "the world's sole monument."
+
+This building consists of three arches, of which the centre is the
+largest; and has two fronts, each adorned with four columns of giallo
+antico marble, of the Corinthian order, and fluted, supporting a
+cornice, on which stand eight Dacian captives of Pavonazzetta, or
+violet-coloured marble.
+
+The inscription on both sides of the architrave imports, that it was
+dedicated "to the Emperor Cæsar Flavius Constantine Augustus, the
+greatest, pious, and the happy; because by a divine impulse, the
+greatness of his courage, and the aid of his army, he avenged the
+republic by his just arms, and, at the same time, rescued it from the
+tyrant and his whole faction." On one side of the arch are the words,
+"Liberatori urbis," to the deliverer of the city; and on the other,
+"Fundatori quietis," to the founder of public tranquillity.
+
+Although erected to the honour of Constantine, this arch commemorates
+the victories of Trajan, some of the basso-relievos, &c. having
+been pilfered from one of the arches of Trajan. This accounts for
+the Dacian captives, whose heads Lorenzo de Medicis broke off and
+conveyed to Florence, but the theft might not have been so notorious
+to posterity, had not the artists of Constantine's time added some
+figures of inferior merit. Forsyth says, "Constantine's reign was
+notorious for architectural robbery;" and the styles of the two
+emperors, in the present arch, mar the harmony by their unsightly
+contrasts.
+
+Although the decree for erecting this arch was, without doubt, passed
+immediately after the defeat of Maxentius, it appears from the
+monument itself, that the building was not finished and dedicated till
+the tenth year of Constantine's reign, or the year of Christ 315 or
+316.
+
+The newly-erected arch opposite the entrance to Hyde Park is from the
+Roman arch, though, we believe, not from any particular model. In the
+View of the New Palace, St. James's Park, (in our No. 278,) the arch,
+to be called the Waterloo Monument, and erected in the middle of the
+area of the palace, will be nearly a copy of that of Constantine
+at Rome. In the court-yard of the Tuilleries at Paris, there is a
+similar arch, copied from that of Septimius Severus. This was formerly
+surmounted by the celebrated group of the horses of St. Mark, pilfered
+from Venice, but restored at the peace of 1815.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE BEGGAR'S DAUGHTER OF BETHNAL GREEN.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+The popular ballad of "The Beggar's Daughter of Bednall-Greene" was
+written in the reign of Queen Elizabeth. It is founded, though without
+the least appearance of truth, or even probability, on a legend of
+the time of Henry III. Henry de Montfort, son of the ambitious Earl
+of Leicester, who was slain with his father at the memorable battle
+of Evesham, is the hero of the tale. He is supposed (according to
+the legend) to have been discovered among the bodies of the slain
+by a young lady, in an almost lifeless state, and deprived of sight
+by a wound, which he had received during the engagement. Under
+the fostering hand of this "faire damosel" he soon recovered, and
+afterwards marrying her, she became the mother of "the comelye and
+prettye Bessee." Fearing lest his rank and person should be discovered
+by his enemies, he disguised himself in the habit of a beggar, and
+took up his abode at Bethnal-Green. The beauty of his daughter
+attracted many suitors, and she was at length married to a noble
+knight, who, regardless of her supposed meanness and poverty, had the
+courage to make her his wife, her other lovers having deserted her on
+account of her low origin. Before entering, however, upon the ballad,
+it may not, perhaps, be thought irrelevant to give a brief sketch of
+the family of the De Montforts.
+
+Simon de Montfort, created Earl of Leicester by Henry III., was the
+younger son of Simon de Montfort, the renowned but cruel commander
+of the croisade against the Albigenses. This nobleman was greatly
+honoured by Henry III., to whose sister, the Countess Dowager of
+Pembroke, he paid his addresses, and was married, with the consent
+of her brother. For the favour thus shown him by his sovereign, he,
+however, proved ungrateful: his inordinate ambition, cloaked by a
+pretended zeal for reform, was the cause of those rebellions which, in
+the reign of Henry III., kept the kingdom in such a continued turmoil.
+The different oppressions and successes of the confederate barons,
+who at length got possession of the king's person, and the civil
+wars which ensued, are so well known as to render any remark on the
+subject superfluous; suffice it to say, that the disputes between
+the malcontents and the royal party were at length terminated by the
+battle of Evesham, which decided in favour of the latter. In this
+field fell the Earl of Leicester and his eldest son, Henry de
+Montfort. His death was followed by the total ruin of his family;
+his titles and estates were all confiscated; the countess, his wife,
+who had been extremely active in her designs against the royalists,
+was banished, together with her sons, Simon and Guy, who afterwards
+assassinated their cousin, Henry d'Allmane, when he was endeavouring
+to effect a reconciliation between them and their uncle, Henry IV.
+The head of the earl was sent as a signal of the victory by Roger de
+Mortimer to the countess; but his body, together with that of his
+son Henry, was interred in the Abbey of Evesham; thus leaving the
+improbability of the legend without a shadow of doubt.
+
+As our limits will not allow us to quote the whole of the ballad,[1]
+we must content ourselves with giving the song of the beggar, which,
+as well as being the most interesting, contains the whole of the
+legend concerning de Montfort:--
+
+ A poore beggar's daughter did dwell on a greene,
+ Who for her fairnesse might well be a queene:
+ A blithe bonny lasse, and a daintye was shee,
+ And many one called her pretty Bessee.
+
+ Her father hee had noe goods nor noe land,
+ But begg'd for a penny all day with his hand;
+ And yett to her marriage he gave thousands three,
+ And still he hath somewhat for pretty Bessee.
+
+ And if any one here her birth doe disdaine,
+ Her father is ready, with might and with maine,
+ To prove shee is come of noble degree--
+ Therefore, ever flout att prettye Bessee.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+ Then give me leave, nobles and gentles, each one,
+ One song more to sing, and then I have done;
+ And if that itt may not winn good report,
+ Then doe not give me a GROAT for my sport.
+
+ Sir Simon de Montfort my subject shall bee.
+ Once chiefe of all the great barons was hee--
+ Yet fortune so cruelle this lorde did abase,
+ Now loste and forgotten are hee and his race.
+
+ When the barons in armes did King Henrye oppose,
+ Sir Simon de Montfort their leader they chose--
+ A leader of courage undaunted was hee,
+ And oft-times he made their enemyes flee.
+
+ At length in the battle on Eveshame plaine
+ The barons were routed, and Montfort was slaine;
+ Moste fatall that battel did prove unto thee,
+ Thoughe thou wast not borne then, my prettye Bessee!
+
+ Along with the nobles that fell at that tyde,
+ His eldest son Henrye, who fought by his side,
+ Was fellde by a blowe he receiv'de in the fighte!
+ A blowe that depriv'de him for ever of sight.
+
+ Among the dead bodyes all lifelesse he laye,
+ Till evening drewe on of the following daye,
+ When by a yong ladye discover'd was hee--
+ And this was thy mother, my prettye Bessee!
+
+ A baron's faire daughter stept forth in the nighte,
+ To search for her father, who fell in the fight,
+ And seeing yong Montfort, where gasping he laye,
+ Was moved with pitye, and broughte him awaye.
+
+ In secrette she nurst him, and swaged his paine,
+ While he throughe the realme was beleev'd to be slaine:
+ At lengthe his faire bride she consented to bee,
+ And made him glad father of prettye Bessee.
+
+ And nowe, lest oure foes our lives sholde betraye
+ We clothed ourselves in beggars' arraye;
+ Her jewells shee solde, and hither came wee--
+ All our comfort and care was our prettye Bessee.
+
+ And here have wee lived in fortunes despite,
+ Thoughe poore, yet contented with humble delighte;
+ Full forty winters thus have I beene
+ A silly blind beggar of Bednall-greene.
+
+ And here, noble lordes, is ended the song
+ Of one that once to your owne ranke did belong:
+ And thus have you learned a secrette from mee,
+ That ne'er had beene knowne but for prettye Bessee.
+
+ [1] Vide Percy's "Reliques," vol. ii. p. 178.
+
+At Bethnal-Green is an old mansion, which, in the survey of 1703, was
+called _Bethnal-Green-House_, and which the inhabitants, with their
+usual love of traditionary lore, assign as the "Palace of the Blind
+Beggar." This house was erected in the reign of Queen Elizabeth, by
+John Kirby, citizen of London, and was, says Stow,[1] "lofty like a
+castle." It was afterwards the residence of Sir Hugh Platt, Knight,
+the author of many ingenious works; from him it came into the
+possession of Sir William Ryder, Knight, who died there in 1669; of
+late years it has been used as a private madhouse. The tradition of
+the beggar is still preserved on the sign-posts of several of the
+public-houses in the neighbourhood.
+
+ [1] Strype's Stowe, vol. ii. p. 47, edit. 1755.
+
+S.I.B.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+HISTORY AND ANTIQUITY OF WILLS.
+
+(_For the Mirror._)
+
+According to Blackstone, wills are of high antiquity. We find them
+among the ancient Hebrews; not to mention what Eusebius and others
+have related of Noah's testament, made in writing, and witnessed under
+his seal, by which he disposed of the whole world. A more authentic
+instance of the early use of testaments occurs in the sacred writings,
+(Genesis, chap. xlviii.) in which Jacob bequeaths to his son Joseph, a
+portion of his inheritance, double to that of his brethren.
+
+The Grecian practice concerning wills (says Potter) was not the same
+in all places; some states permitted men to dispose of their estates,
+others wholly deprived them of that privilege. We are told by
+Plutarch, that Solon is much commended for his law concerning wills;
+for before his time no man was allowed to make any, but all the wealth
+of deceased persons belonged to their families; but he permitted them
+to bestow it on whom they pleased, esteeming friendship a stronger tie
+than kindred, and affection than necessity, and thus put every man's
+estate in the disposal of the possessor; yet he allowed not all sorts
+of wills, but required the following conditions in all persons that
+made them:--
+
+1st. That they must be citizens of Athens, not slaves, or foreigners,
+for then their estates were confiscated for the public use.
+
+2nd. That they must be men who have arrived to twenty years of age,
+for women and men under that age were not permitted to dispose by will
+of more than one _medimn_ of barley.
+
+3rd. That they must not be adopted; for when adopted persons died
+without issue, the estates they received by adoption returned to the
+relations of the men who adopted them.
+
+4th. That they should have no male children of their own, for then
+their estate belonged to these. If they had only daughters, the
+persons to whom the inheritance was bequeathed were obliged to marry
+them. Yet men were allowed to appoint heirs to succeed their children,
+in case these happened to die under twenty years of age.
+
+5th. That they should be in their right minds, because testaments
+extorted through the phrenzy of a disease, or dotage of old age, were
+not in reality the wills of the persons that made them.
+
+6th. That they should not be under imprisonment, or other constraint,
+their consent being then only forced, nor in justice to be reputed
+voluntary.
+
+7th. That they should not be induced to it by the charms and
+insinuations of a wife; for (says Plutarch) the wise lawgiver with
+good reason thought that no difference was to be put between deceit
+and necessity, flattery and compulsion, since both are equally
+powerful to persuade a man from reason.
+
+Wills were usually signed before several witnesses, who put seals to
+them for confirmation, then placed them in the hands of trustees, who
+were obliged to see them performed. At Athens, some of the magistrates
+were very often present at the making of wills. Sometimes the
+_archons_ were also present. Sometimes the testator declared his will
+before sufficient witnesses, without committing it to writing. Thus
+Callias, fearing to be cut off by a wicked conspiracy, is said to have
+made an open declaration of his will before the popular assembly at
+Athens. There were several copies of wills in Diogenes Laertius, as
+those of Aristotle, Lycon, and Theophrastus; whence it appears they
+had a common form, beginning with a wish for life and health.
+
+The most ancient testaments among the Romans were made _vivâ voce_,
+the testator declaring his will in the presence of seven witnesses;
+these they called _nuncupative_ testaments; but the danger of trusting
+the will of the dead to the memory of the living soon abolished these;
+and all testaments were ordered to be in writing.
+
+The Romans were wont to set aside testaments, as being _inofficiosa_,
+deficient in natural duty, if they disinherited or totally passed by
+(without assigning a true and sufficient reason) any of the children
+of the testator. But if the child had any legacy, though ever so
+small, it was a proof that the testator had not lost his memory nor
+his reason, which otherwise the law presumed. Hence probably (says
+Blackstone) has arisen that groundless, vulgar error of the necessity
+of leaving the heir a shilling, or some other express legacy, in order
+to effectually disinherit him; whereas the law of England, though
+the heir, or next of kin, be totally omitted, admits no _querela
+inofficiosa_, to set aside such testament.
+
+Alfred the Great made a will, wherein he declared, in express terms,
+that it was just the English should be as free as their own thoughts.
+
+P.T.W.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+
+THE COSMOPOLITE.
+
+DANCING.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+
+Dancing is defined to be "to move in measure; to move with steps
+correspondent to the sound of instruments." But there are other
+species of dancing--as
+
+ -----------------for three long months
+ To _dance attendance_ for a word of audience:
+
+and to dance with pain, or when, as Lord Bacon says, "in pestilences,
+the malignity of the infecting vapour danceth the principal spirits."
+The _Chorea S. Viti_, or _St. Vitus's Dance_ is another variation,
+said to have once prevailed extensively, and to have been cured by a
+prayer to this saint! whose martyrdom is commemorated on June 15. It
+may not be generally known that a person afflicted with this species
+of dancing can _run_, although he cannot walk or stand still. Another
+and a more agreeable species is to _lead the dance_, an unjust
+usurpation which is practised in a thousand other places beside the
+ball-room.
+
+According to the mythologists, (authorities always quotable, and
+nobody knows why,) the Curetes or Corybantes, a people of Crete, who
+were _produced from rain_, first invented the dance to amuse the
+infant Jupiter--with what success he danced we know not, for when a
+year old he waged war against the Titans, and then his dancing days
+must have terminated.
+
+A history of dancing is, however, not to our purpose; but a few of its
+eccentricities. It occurs in the customs of all people, either as a
+recreation or as a religious ceremony--held in contempt by some, and
+in esteem by others. David danced before the ark; the daughters of
+Shiloh danced in a solemn yearly festival; and the Israelites, (good
+judges) danced round the golden calf.
+
+The ancients had a peculiar _penchant_ for dancing, whether in person
+or by animals; and the feats of the latter distance all the wretched
+efforts of the bears, dogs, and horses of our days. The attempts
+of Galba to amuse the Roman people throw into the shade all the
+peace-rejoicings and illuminations of St. James's and the Green Parks.
+Suetonius, Seneca, and Pliny tell us of _elephants_ in their time that
+were taught to walk the rope, backwards and forwards, up and down,
+with the agility of an Italian rope-dancer. Such was the confidence
+reposed in the docility and dexterity of the animal, that a person
+sat upon an elephant's back, while he walked across the theatre
+upon a rope, extended from the one side to the other. Lipsius,
+who has collected these testimonies, thinks them too strong to be
+doubted--perhaps even stronger than the rope. Scaliger corroborates
+all of them; Busbequius _saw_ an elephant dance a _pas seul_ at
+Constantinople; and Suetonius tells us of twelve elephants, six male
+and six female, who were clothed like men and women, and performed a
+country dance, in the reign of Tiberius. In later times, horses have
+been taught to dance. In the carousals of Louis XIII. there were
+dances of horses; and in the 13th century, some rode a horse upon a
+rope. All this eclipses the puny modern feats of Astley and Ducrow.[1]
+
+ [1] Miraculous dancing is not, however, confined to animals; for
+ William of Malmesbury gravely relates an instance of 15 young
+ women and 18 young men who (by the anathema of a priest) continued
+ dancing a whole year, and wore the earth so much, that, by
+ degrees, they sunk midway into the earth!
+
+The Greeks and Romans were divided upon the propriety of dancing.
+Socrates who held death in contempt, when a reverend old gentleman,
+learned to dance of Aspasia, the beautiful nurse of Grecian eloquence.
+The Romans forgot their loss of the republic and of liberty--
+
+ ------------------the air we breathe
+ If we have it not we die.
+
+in seeing Pylades and Bathyllus dance before them in their
+theatres--an indifference of which we were reminded on hearing that
+the Parisians sat in the _Cafés_ on the Boulevard du Italiens--sipping
+coffee and sucking down ice, during the capitulation of the city, and
+while the French, killed and wounded, were conveyed along the road
+before them.
+
+Cato, _Censorius_, danced at the age of fifty-six. Cicero, however,
+reproached a consul with having danced. Tiberius, that monster of
+indulgences, banished dancers from Rome; and Domitian, the illustrious
+fly-catcher, expelled several of his _members of parliament_ for
+having danced. We are much more civilized, for such an edict as that
+of Domitian would clear our senate-houses as effectually as when
+Cromwell turned out the Long Parliament.
+
+Among the Italians and the French even there have been found enemies
+to dancing. Alfieri, the poet, had a great aversion to dancing; and
+one Daneau wrote a Traité des Danses, in which he maintains that
+"the devil never invented a more effectual way than dancing, to fill
+the world with ----." The bishop of Noyon once presided at some
+deliberations respecting a minuet; and in 1770, a reverend prelate
+presented a document on dancing to the king of France. The Quakers
+consider dancing below the dignity of the Christian character; and an
+enthusiast, of another creed, thinks all lovers of the stage belong to
+the schools of Voltaire and Hume, and that dancing is a link in the
+chain of seduction. Stupid, leaden-heeled people, who constantly mope
+in melancholy, and neither enjoy nor impart pleasure, will naturally
+be enemies to dancing; and such we are induced to think the majority
+of these opponents.
+
+The French are inveterate dancers. They have their _bals parés_ and
+their _salons de danse_ in every street; and as long as the weather
+will permit, they dance on platforms out of doors, and a heavy shower
+of rain will scarcely cool their ardour in the recreation. Some of
+their stage _figurantes_ resemble aerial beings rather than bone and
+blood, for flesh may almost be left out of the composition. But the
+Italians are a nation of dancers as well as the children of song, and
+they seem to have followed the noble example of old Cato, in this
+respect, with better effect than they have studied his virtue. We are
+also told upon good authority, that the American dancers equal any of
+the European _figurantes_.
+
+The English people have always been lovers of dancing; and it forms
+an accompaniment of almost all their old sports and pastimes. Witness
+the maypoles, wassails, and wakes of rural life, and the grotesque
+morris-dance, originating in a kind of Pyrrhic or military dance, and
+described by Sir William Temple as composed of "ten men, who danced a
+maid marian and a tabor and pipe." In the time of Henry VII. dancers
+were remarkably well paid; for in some of his accounts in the
+Exchequer, we find
+
+ £. s. d.
+Paid to a spye, in reward----------------- 2 0 0
+To Pechie, the fool, in rewarde----------- 0 6 8
+To Richard Beden, for writing of bokes---- 0 10 0
+_To the young dameysell that daunceth_---- 30 0 0
+
+In Shakspeare's time, to _dance_ was an elegant accomplishment. Thus
+in the "Merry Wives of Windsor," "What say you to young Mr. Fenton? He
+capers, he _dances_, he has eyes of youth, he writes verses." Locke
+thus alludes to the graceful motions which dancing lends to the human
+frame: "the legs of the dancing-master, and the fingers of a musician,
+fall, as it were, naturally, without thought or pains, into regular
+and admirable motions."
+
+It must be somewhat surprising to those who over-rate the
+matter-of-fact character of the English people, that so great a
+majority of them are attached to _dancing_. Among rank and wealth
+this amusement admits of a finer display of beauty and artificial
+decoration than almost any other recreation; for nothing can be more
+splendid than a brilliantly illuminated and well-filled ball-room.
+Dancing among the middle classes of society is equally mirthful though
+not of so ostentatious a character, and it is a question whether the
+latter, being free from the alloy of fashionable follies, are not more
+exhilarated by sweet sounds than their wealthy superiors. But the
+mushroom aristocracy and pride of purse often operate as checks to the
+enjoyment of both these classes; and splendid dancing accommodations
+sometimes put an end to the amusement. At Dorking, in Surrey, attached
+to one of the inns is a ball-room, which cost the builder £12,000, and
+here is one, or at most three balls during the year, while at scores
+of places within our recollection, of less consequence, there are
+monthly and even weekly balls; and we are inclined to think these
+periodical recreations of great importance to the happiness of country
+towns. But there is a species of intoxication sometimes arising
+from them--that of dancing all night, to suffer from exhaustion and
+rheumatism on the following day--an evil easy of remedy, by such
+amusements being more frequent and less protracted. The influence
+on the character of the people would probably be that of rendering
+it more even, from the admixture or reciprocation of pleasure and
+business being more proportional. This plan would get rid of much of
+the ostentation and expense of a country ball, and would ultimately
+prove the best antidote to the sins of scandal.
+
+As we have spoken of public dancing in the time of Henry VII., we will
+show that the enormous sums paid to _artists_ have nourished their
+conceit to an alarming height. Pitrot, the Vestris of his day, was a
+consummate specimen of this effrontery. At Vienna, he chose to appear
+only in the last act of the ballet. The emperor desired him to come
+forth at the end of the first; Pitrot refused; the court left the
+opera, and then Pitrot told the dancers they would have a hop by
+themselves, which they did. However, this was forgiven; and, at his
+departure, he was presented with the emperor's picture, set with
+brilliants. Pitrot received it with _sang froid_, pressed his thumb
+upon the crystal, crushed the picture to pieces, adding, "Thus I treat
+men not worthy of my friendship." This fellow behaved equally ill
+in France, Prussia, and Russia; but, at length, scouted by all his
+patrons, and, after giving his thousands to opera girls, he wandered
+about Calais in rags and poverty. Farinelli, after accumulating a
+fortune in England, built a superb mansion in Italy, which he called
+the _English Folly_.[1]
+
+ [1] Here is a card "extraordinary" of one of our humble English
+ dancing-masters:--"As Dancing is the poetry of motion, those who
+ wish to sail through the mazes of harmony, or to 'trip it on the
+ light fantastic toe,' will find an able guide in John Wilde, who
+ was formed by nature for a dancing-master.--N.B. Those who have
+ been taught to dance with _a couple of left legs_, had better
+ apply in time, as he effectually cures all bad habits of the
+ kind."
+
+The oddity of some ideas of dancing is really ludicrous. The
+Cambro-Britains, in a very late period, used to be played out of
+church by a fiddle, and to form a dance in the church-yard at the
+end of the service. But the ideas which the Chinese have of dancing
+exceeds all others. When Commodore Anson was at Canton, the officers
+of the _Centurion_ had a ball upon some court holiday: while they were
+dancing, a Chinese, who very quietly surveyed the operation, said,
+softly, to one of the party, "Why don't you let your servants do this
+for you?"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+FINE ARTS.
+
+SCHOOL OF PAINTING AT THE BRITISH INSTITUTION.
+
+_(To the Editor of the Mirror.)_
+
+
+I beg to present you with a brief notice of the School of Painting at
+the British Institution, Pall Mall; you may rely upon its correctness,
+as I have been extremely cautious in making my notes, and in
+ascertaining every particular relative to the subject.
+
+The students at this excellent institution have, for several weeks,
+been arduously engaged in copying the fine pictures which were
+entrusted to the directors by his majesty, and the nobility, for that
+purpose. In general, the students have been very successful, and
+deserve much praise; I must, however, in my prescribed limits, only
+mention a few.
+
+Vandyke's _Duchess de St. Croix_ has been cleverly copied by Mr. Boden
+and Mr. Faulkner; the latter gentleman has well imitated the color and
+the beautiful finish of the original. Messrs. Frisk, Child, Howell
+and M'Call have likewise made clever copies of this _chef d'oeuvre_
+of art. Many bold efforts have been made to copy Hobbima's large
+_Landscape_; Mr. Laporte's is the most complete, though not quite
+spirited enough in the handling. _The Spanish Gentleman_, by
+Velasquez, has engaged the pencils of numerous artists, though they
+have not all been so successful as could have been wished; Messrs.
+Inskipp, Frisk, Morton and Child have produced the best _fac similes_.
+The _Lime Kiln_, by the younger Teniers, has been carefully studied
+by Mr. Gill, &c.; and Messrs. M'Call and Morton, have executed the
+finest studies from _Innocent X._, by Velasquez. _The Embarkation_,
+by Claude, is extremely well imitated in Mr. Cartwright's copy; and
+the _Virgin and Child_, which is one of Julio Romano's best works,
+has met with due attention from Mr. Farrier, and others. Mr. Novice
+has executed the only copy from DeHooge's fine picture--_A Dutch
+Family preparing for a Walk_; and Messrs. Foster and Earl display
+considerable talent in their copies from the _Landscape and Cattle_,
+by Cuyp. Other admirable works by Guido, Rubens, Bassan, Ruysdael,
+Vanderneer, and Canaletta, have met with a host of imitators, from
+whose talents we may anticipate, at no distant period, pictorial
+excellency of the first order. I should discover a want of gallantry,
+and, indeed, be most unjust, were I not to say that the ladies, in
+nearly all their undertakings, have exerted their utmost to excel;
+those especially, who have executed copies in water colours deserve
+the highest recommendation.
+
+G.W.N.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE ANECDOTE GALLERY.
+
+THAXTED HIGHWAYMEN.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+
+The following incident led to the breaking up and dispersion of a gang
+of desperate highwaymen, denominated the Thaxted gang, who about sixty
+years ago used to infest the roads in the neighbourhood of Dunmow,
+Thaxted, and the adjacent towns and villages:--
+
+An opulent farmer of Thaxted, being one day at Dunmow market, received
+a considerable sum of money, the produce of grain and other marketable
+articles, which he had that day disposed of; and going to the inn
+where he had left his horse, he ordered it to be saddled directly
+for the purpose of returning home. In those times every tradesman,
+salesman and a greater part of the publicans and innkeepers knew what
+money each other received on a market day. The innkeeper at whose
+house the farmer was in the habit of putting up at, said to him, "Why
+you are not going home to-night, are you, with all that money about
+you? You will stand a chance of getting a knock on the head."--"Let
+them knock away," answered the farmer. "I have never yet been robbed,
+nor do I think it likely I shall be to-night; so, Robert, get my horse
+ready," calling to the hostler. "Well, but have you any weapons of
+defence?" inquired the publican.--"No, nor none I want," responded the
+farmer. The innkeeper pressed him to take a pair of holster pistols;
+saying, "he might find them handy;" and after a great deal of
+persuasion, he agreed to take _one_, the publican first loading and
+charging it with ball. The farmer put the pistol in his great coat
+pocket, and was on the point of departure when he recollected that he
+had to get a pound of tea at a grocer's shop in the town, a few doors
+from the inn. He instantly ran to the shop for the tea, and while the
+grocer was serving him he made the same remark as the innkeeper had
+done respecting his going home with so considerable a sum as he knew
+the farmer had about him. The farmer made answer, "I am going home
+to-night, but our friend the publican, has lent me a pistol; and if
+any one interrupts me, I intend to blow his brains out."--"Do you
+know," said the grocer, "I do not like that fellow. Will you let me
+look at the pistol if you have it with you."--"O yes, look at it if
+you like. I never fired a pistol in my life; however, should I be
+stopped, I think I could manage it." The grocer took the pistol; drew
+the charge; and found, to the great surprise of the farmer, it was
+only loaded with horse-dung, and a large bullet at the top. "I thought
+he was a rascal, and this confirms it." said the grocer. "Here is
+evidently a plot; now leave your money with me; we will load this
+pistol properly, and you can, if you like, proceed on your journey:
+it may be the means of detecting some one."
+
+The farmer left his money in the hands of the grocer; went back to the
+inn; mounted his horse, and rode off on his journey. About a mile
+from Dunmow, he was stopped by a fellow, well mounted, who instantly
+demanded his money. "I have not got any," replied the farmer, "but I
+have a pistol, with which, if you do not instantly allow me to pass on
+my way home, I will blow your brains out." "You have got money--and as
+to the pistol, you may blow away--blow away, my fine fellow," said the
+chuckling highwayman. The farmer instantly fired, and his assailant
+fell off his horse to the ground with a groan. The farmer galloped
+back to the inn, and inquired of the hostler where his master was.
+"He has been gone out, on horseback, about a quarter of an hour,"
+the hostler replied. "Well, I will tell you what," said the farmer,
+"you may find your master, with his brains blown out, in the road,"
+describing the place where he had had the encounter with the
+innkeeper.
+
+From this time a number of persons resident in and about Thaxted and
+Dunmow, left their places of abode, which circumstance created some
+surprise among the remaining inhabitants; but it was afterwards
+ascertained they formed the desperate gang that had so long and
+successfully robbed, and sometimes murdered, their unsuspecting
+neighbours and the different travellers who had occasion to pass the
+roads on which these marauders were stationed.
+
+J.W.B.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+MANNERS & CUSTOMS OF ALL NATIONS.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+
+WISE MEN OF GOTHAM.
+
+The village of Gotham, about seven miles from Nottingham, has been
+rendered noted by the common proverb of "The Wise Men of Gotham."
+It is observable that a custom has prevailed among many nations of
+stigmatizing the inhabitants of some particular spot as remarkable for
+stupidity. This opprobrious district among the Asiatics was Phrygia.
+Among the Thracians, Abdera; among the Greeks, Boeotia; in England
+it is Gotham. Of the Gothamites ironically called _The Wise Men of
+Gotham_, many ridiculous stories are traditionally told, particularly,
+that often having heard the cuckoo but never seen her, they hedged in
+a bush from whence her note seemed to proceed, so that being confined
+within so small a compass, they might at length satisfy their
+curiosity; and at a place called Court Hill, in this parish, is a bush
+called Cuckoo Bush.
+
+HALBERT H.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+MALLARD NIGHT.
+
+At All Souls' College, Oxford, the _Mallard Night_ is celebrated
+annually on the 14th of January, in remembrance of a very singular
+circumstance, viz. the discovery of a live and excessively large
+mallard, or drake, supposed to have long ranged in a drain or sewer
+of considerable depth. The only probable conjecture respecting its
+extraordinary situation was, that it had fallen when young through the
+bars or grating at the entrance of the drain, (which was of sufficient
+width to receive it if very young,) but was found at a great distance
+from it, on digging for the foundation of the college, (A.D. 1437.) A
+very humorous account of this event was published some years ago by
+Dr. Buckler, subwarden, from a manuscript of Thomas Walsingham, the
+historian, and monk of St. Alban's. It is the cause of much mirth, for
+on the day, and in remembrance of the mallard, many an old and merry
+song is sung.
+
+E.T.S.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+WELSH MARRIAGES.
+
+It appears to me a matter of no small surprise that so economical
+a people as the English should not have adopted such a plan as the
+following by the lower classes of the Welsh. When a young couple
+intend offering themselves at the Temple of Hymen, if they are very
+poor, they generally send a man, called the bidder, round to their
+acquaintance and friends, who invites them, sometimes in rhyme, to
+the wedding; but if they can afford it, they issue circulars. The
+following is a copy of one:--
+
+"_June 27, 1827._
+
+"As we intend to enter the matrimonial state on Thursday, the 19th day
+of July next, we are encouraged by our friends to make a bidding on
+the occasion, the same day, at the Butchers' Arms, Carmarthen, when
+and where the favour of your good and agreeable company is humbly
+solicited; and whatever donation you may be pleased to confer on us
+then, will be thankfully received, warmly acknowledged, and cheerfully
+repaid whenever called for on a similar occasion.
+
+"By your most obedient servants,
+
+"JOHN JONES.
+
+"MARY EVANS."
+
+The persons so invited (if they accept the invitation) generally form
+part of the procession to church, and are preceded by a harper or
+fiddler. After the nuptial knot is tied, they veer their course to
+the public-house mentioned in the bills, where they partake, not of a
+sumptuous banquet, but of the simple, though not the worst, fare of
+bread and cheese and kisses, at the expense of the new married folks.
+After this, a large plate is placed on the table in the room, and they
+proceed to receive the money which each person may be disposed to
+give, whilst one keeps account of the sum and names. They frequently
+receive 50_l._, and sometimes, though seldom, 100_l._; and they have
+the privilege (by paying the duty) of selling the ale to the persons
+assembled. It is to be observed, that the money so deposited cannot be
+reclaimed by the persons who gave it until a similar occasion presents
+itself in their family. By this means the new married couple are
+enabled to procure furniture, and other things requisite for them.
+
+W.H.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+CURIOUS FOUNDATION.
+
+At Spinney, in Cambridgeshire, was an abbey founded in the reign of
+Henry III. near which was a church, built by Lady Mary Bassingburne,
+and given to the Abbey of Spinney, on condition that the monks should
+support seven aged men with the following allowance, viz. one farthing
+loaf, one herring, and one pennyworth of ale per day, and two hundred
+dry turves, one pair of shoes, one woollen garment, and three ells of
+linen every year. Henry Cromwell, second son of Oliver Cromwell, is
+buried here.
+
+HALBERT H.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE SELECTOR,
+
+AND
+
+LITERARY NOTICES OF
+
+_NEW WORKS_
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+ADVENTURES OF ALLAN-A-SOP.
+
+_By Sir Walter Scott, Bart._
+
+The chief of the clan, MacLean of Duart, in the Isle of Mull, had an
+intrigue with a beautiful young woman of his own clan, who bore a son
+to him. In consequence of the child's being, by some accident, born in
+a barn, he received the name of Allan-a-Sop, or Allan of the Straw, by
+which he was distinguished from others of his clan. As his father and
+mother were not married, Allan was of course a bastard or natural son,
+and had no inheritance to look for, save that which he might win for
+himself.
+
+But the beauty of the boy's mother having captivated a man of rank in
+the clan, called MacLean of Torloisk, he married her, and took her
+to reside with him at his castle of Torloisk, situated on the shores
+of the Sound, or small strait of the sea, which divides the smaller
+island of Ulva from that of Mull. Allan-a-Sop paid his mother frequent
+visits at her new residence, and she was naturally glad to see the
+poor boy, both from affection, and on account of his personal strength
+and beauty, which distinguished him above other youths of his age. But
+she was obliged to confer marks of her attachment on him as privately
+as she could, for Allan's visits were by no means so acceptable to
+her husband as to herself. Indeed, Torloisk liked so little to see
+the lad, that he determined to put some affront on him, which should
+prevent his returning to the castle for some time. An opportunity for
+executing his purpose soon occurred.
+
+The lady one morning, looking from the window, saw her son coming
+wandering down the hill, and hastened to put a girdle cake upon
+the fire, that he might have hot bread to his breakfast. Something
+called her out of the apartment after making this preparation, and
+her husband entering at the same time, saw at once what she had been
+about, and determined to give the boy such a reception as should
+disgust him for the future. He snatched the cake from the girdle,
+thrust it into his step-son's hands, which he forcibly closed on the
+scalding bread, saying, "Here, Allan--here is a cake which your mother
+has got ready for your breakfast." Allan's hands were severely burnt;
+and, being a sharp-witted and proud boy, he resented this mark of his
+step-father's ill-will, and came not again to Torloisk.
+
+At this time the western seas were covered with the vessels of
+pirates, who, not unlike the sea-kings of Denmark at an early period,
+sometimes settled and made conquests on the islands. Allan-a-Sop was
+young, strong, and brave to desperation. He entered as a mariner on
+board of one of these ships, and in process of time obtained the
+command, first of one galley, then of a small flotilla, with which he
+sailed round the seas and collected considerable plunder, until his
+name became both feared and famous. At length he proposed to himself
+to pay a visit to his mother, whom he had not seen for many years; and
+setting sail for this purpose, he anchored one morning in the Sound of
+Ulva, and in front of the house of Torloisk. His mother was dead, but
+his stepfather, to whom he was now an object of fear as he had been
+formerly of aversion, hastened to the shore to receive his formidable
+son-in-law, with great affectation of kindness and interest in his
+prosperity; while Allan-a-Sop, who, though very rough and hasty, does
+not appear to have been sullen or vindictive, seemed to take his kind
+reception in good part.
+
+The crafty old man succeeded so well, as he thought, in securing
+Allan's friendship, and in obliterating all recollections of the
+former affront put on him, that he began to think it possible to
+employ him in executing his private revenge upon MacKinnon of Ulva,
+with whom, as was usual between such neighbours, he had some feud.
+With this purpose, he offered what he called the following good advice
+to his son-in-law:--"My dear Allan, you have now wandered over the
+seas long enough; it is time you should have some footing upon land,
+a castle to protect yourself in winter, a village and cattle for your
+men, and a harbour to lay up your galleys. Now, here is the island
+of Ulva, near at hand, which lies ready for your occupation, and it
+will cost you no trouble, save that of putting to death the present
+proprietor, the Laird of MacKinnon, a useless old carle, who has
+cumbered the world long enough."
+
+Allan-a-Sop thanked his stepfather for so happy a suggestion, which
+he declared he would put in execution forthwith. Accordingly, setting
+sail the next morning, he appeared before MacKinnon's house an hour
+before noon. The old chief of Ulva was much alarmed at the menacing
+apparition of so many galleys, and his anxiety was not lessened by the
+news, that they were commanded by the redoubted Allan-a-Sop. Having
+no effectual means of resistance, MacKinnon, who was a man of shrewd
+sense, saw no alternative save that of receiving the invaders,
+whatever might be their purpose, with all outward demonstrations of
+joy and satisfaction. He caused immediate preparations to be made for
+a banquet as splendid as circumstances admitted, hastened down to
+the shore to meet the rover, and welcomed him to Ulva with such an
+appearance of sincerity, that the pirate found it impossible to pick
+any quarrel which might afford a pretence for executing the violent
+purpose which he had been led to meditate.
+
+They feasted together the whole day; and in the evening, as
+Allan-a-Sop was about to retire to his ships, he thanked the Laird
+of MacKinnon for his entertainment, but remarked, with a sigh, that
+it had cost him very dear. "How can that be" said MacKinnon, "when I
+bestowed this entertainment upon you in free good-will?"--"It is true,
+my friend," replied the pirate, "but then it has quite disconcerted
+the purpose for which I came hither; which was to put you to death,
+my good friend, and seize upon your house and island, and so settle
+myself in the world. It would have been very convenient, this island,
+but your friendly reception has rendered it impossible for me to
+execute my purpose; so that I must be a wanderer on the seas for some
+time longer." Whatever MacKinnon felt at hearing that he had been so
+near to destruction, he took care to show no emotion save surprise,
+and replied to his visiter,--"My dear Allan, who was it that put into
+your mind so unkind a purpose towards your old friend; for I am sure
+it never arose from your own generous nature? It must have been your
+father-in-law, old Torloisk, who made such an indifferent husband to
+your mother, and such an unfriendly stepfather to you when you were a
+helpless boy; but now, when he sees you a bold and powerful leader, he
+desires to make a quarrel betwixt you and those who were the friends
+of your youth. If you consider this matter rightly, Allan, you will
+see that the estate and harbour of Torloisk lie as conveniently for
+you as those of Ulva, and that, if you are to make a settlement by
+force, it is much better it should be at the expense of the old churl,
+who never showed you kindness or countenance, than at that of a friend
+like me, who always loved and honoured you."
+
+Allan-a-Sop was struck with the justice of this reasoning; and the old
+offence of his scalded fingers was suddenly recalled to his mind. "It
+is very true what you say, MacKinnon," he replied, "and, besides, I
+have not forgotten what a hot breakfast my father-in-law treated me to
+one morning. Farewell for the present; you shall soon hear news of me
+from the other side of the Sound." Having said thus much, the pirate
+got on board, and commanding his men to unmoor the galleys, sailed
+back to Torloisk, and prepared to land in arms. His father-in-law
+hastened to meet him, in expectation to hear of the death of his
+enemy, MacKinnon. But Allan greeted him in a very different manner
+from what he expected. "You hoary old traitor," he said, "you
+instigated my simple good-nature to murder a better man than yourself.
+But have you forgotten how you scorched my fingers twenty years
+ago, with a burning cake? The day is come that that breakfast must
+be paid for." So saying, he dashed out his father-in-law's brains
+with a battle-axe, took possession of his castle and property,
+and established there a distinguished branch of the clan of
+MacLean.--_Tales of a Grandfather--Second Series._
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+ADVANTAGES OF A GOOD HEART,
+
+_A Fragment from the "Disowned," by the author of "Pelham."_
+
+
+"The next day, Sir Christopher Findlater called on Clarence. 'Let us
+lounge into the park,' said he. 'With pleasure,' replied Clarence;
+and into the park they lounged. By the way they met a crowd, who
+were hurrying a man to prison. The good-hearted Sir Christopher
+stopped--'Who is that poor fellow?' said he. 'It is the
+celebrated'--(in England all criminals are celebrated. Thurtell was
+a hero, Thistlewood a patriot, and Fauntleroy was discovered to be
+exactly like Bonaparte)--'it is the celebrated robber, John Jefferies,
+who broke into Mrs. Wilson's house, and cut the throats of herself and
+her husband, wounded the maid-servant, and split the child's skull
+with the poker.' * * * 'John Jefferies!' exclaimed the baronet, 'let
+us come away.' 'Linden,' continued Sir Christopher, 'that fellow was
+my servant once. He robbed me to some considerable extent. I caught
+him. He appealed to my heart, and you know, my dear fellow, that was
+irresistible, so I let him off. Who could have thought he would have
+turned out so?' And the baronet proceeded to eulogize his own good
+nature, by which it is just necessary to remark, that one miscreant
+had been saved for a few years from transportation in order to rob and
+murder _ad libitum_, and having fulfilled the office of a common pest,
+to suffer on the gallows at last. What a fine thing it is to have a
+good heart! Both our gentlemen now sunk into a reverie, from which
+they were awakened, at the entrance of the park, by a young man in
+rags, who, with a piteous tone, supplicated charity. Clarence, who to
+his honour be it spoken, spent an allotted and considerable part of
+his income in judicious and laborious benevolence, had read a little
+of political morals, then beginning to be understood, and walked on.
+The good-hearted baronet put his hand in his pocket, and gave the
+beggar half-a-guinea, by which a young, strong man, who had only just
+commenced the trade, was confirmed in his imposition for the rest of
+his life; and instead of the useful support, became the pernicious
+incumbrance of society. Sir Christopher had now recovered his spirits.
+'What's like a good action?' said he to Clarence, with a swelling
+breast. The park was crowded to excess; our loungers were joined by
+Lord St. George. His lordship was a staunch Tory. He could not endure
+Wilkes, liberty, or general education. He launched out against the
+enlightenment of domestics. 'What has made you so bitter?' said Sir
+Christopher. 'My valet!' cried Lord St. George; 'he has invented a new
+toasting-fork; is going to take out a patent, make his fortune, _and
+leave me_; that's what I call ingratitude, Sir Christopher; for I
+ordered his wages to be raised five pounds but last year.' 'It _was_
+very ungrateful,' said the ironical Clarence. 'Very!' reiterated
+the good-hearted Sir Christopher. 'You cannot recommend me a valet,
+Findlater,' renewed his lordship; 'a good, honest, sensible fellow,
+who can neither read nor write?' 'N--o--o--that is to say, yes! I can;
+my old servant, Collard, is out of place, and is as ignorant as--as--'
+'I--or you are,' said Lord St. George, with a laugh. 'Precisely,'
+replied the baronet. 'Well, then, I take your recommendation: send
+him to me to-morrow at twelve.' 'I will,' said Sir Christopher. 'My
+dear Findlater,' cried Clarence, when Lord St. George was gone, 'did
+you not tell me some time ago, that Collard was a great rascal, and
+closely _lie_ with Jefferies? and now you recommend him to Lord St.
+George!' 'Hush, hush, hush!' said the baronet; 'he was a great rogue,
+to be sure; but poor fellow, he came to me yesterday with tears in his
+eyes, and said he should starve if I would not give him a character;
+so what could I do?' 'At least, tell Lord St. George the truth,'
+observed Clarence. 'But then Lord St. George would not take him!'
+rejoined the good-hearted Sir Christopher, with forcible _naiveté_.
+'No, no, Linden, we must not be so hard-hearted; we must forgive and
+forget;' and so saying, the baronet threw out his chest, with the
+conscious exultation of a man who has uttered a noble sentiment. The
+moral of this little history is, that Lord St. George, having been
+pillaged 'through thick and thin,' as the proverb has it, for two
+years, at last missed a gold watch, and Monsieur Collard finished his
+career, as his exemplary tutor, Mr. John Jefferies, had done before
+him. Ah! what a fine thing it is to have a good heart. But, to return,
+just as our wanderers had arrived at the further end of the park, Lady
+Westborough and her daughter passed them. Clarence excusing himself to
+his friend, hastened towards them, and was soon occupied in saying the
+prettiest things in the world to the prettiest person, at least in his
+eyes; while Sir Christopher, having done as much mischief as a good
+heart well can do in a walk of an hour, returned home to write a long
+letter to his mother, against 'learning and all such nonsense, which
+only served to blunt the affections and harden the heart.' 'Admirable
+young man!' cried the mother, with tears in her eyes; 'a good heart is
+better than all the heads in the world.' Amen!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+SPIRIT OF THE PUBLIC JOURNALS.
+
+QUADRANGLE OF KING'S COLLEGE, CAMBRIDGE.
+
+
+In the last _New Monthly Magazine_ is an excellent account of this
+splendid structure, in _A Day at Cambridge_,--in which occurs the
+following exquisite little descriptive gem:--
+
+With the exception of a gravel walk, running near to the buildings on
+every side, the whole ground-plot of this quadrangle is covered by an
+unbroken turf, kept, by means of constant and almost hourly attention,
+in that exquisite order which is only to be observed in spots devoted
+to similar purposes, here and at Oxford. The effect of an unbroken
+plot of turf of this kind and quality, and in a situation like this,
+is perfectly unique, and perhaps indescribable. It is supposed to be,
+and in fact is, for all purposes of preservation and beauty, sacred
+from the foot of man or beast; and the feeling arising from this
+circumstance, added to the exquisite natural adaptation of the object
+itself to the purposes of rest and relief from the almost dazzling
+architectural splendour of the surrounding objects, is such as cannot
+be communicated by any other means whatever, and we might in vain
+attempt to describe. It is of such a kind, however, that those who
+are capable of experiencing it, would as soon think of treading upon
+the object that conveys it to them, as those who honour Nature would
+think of rooting up a nest of violets. Speaking for ourselves alone,
+there is but one thing that can disturb and deteriorate the absolute
+tranquillity of mind, and peace of heart, which fall upon us, like
+dew from heaven, on entering a place like that we have attempted to
+describe above; it is, to see a capped and gowned Fellow, profaning
+with his footsteps the floor of that, in some sort, sacred temple,
+merely because he can, by so doing, reach his habitation by a few
+footsteps less than if he kept to the path allotted for him. We look
+upon the act as a species of impiety; to say nothing of its proving,
+to a demonstration, that the person who commits it is either utterly
+insensible to the mysterious harmony that subsists between a certain
+class of natural objects and the heart of man; or utterly disregards
+that harmony, and sets it at naught. He is, in fact, one of whom it
+may in one sense be said, that
+
+ "He hath no music in his soul."
+
+And we are almost tempted to complete the quotation, by adding--
+
+ "Let no such man be trusted!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+A RUSTIC PAIR.
+
+_By Miss Mitford_.
+
+Few damsels of twelve years old, generally a very pretty age, were
+less pretty that Hannah Bint. Short and stunted in her figure, thin
+in face, sharp in feature, with a muddled complexion, wild sun-burnt
+hair, and eyes, whose very brightness had in them something startling,
+over-informed, super-subtle, too clever for her age. At twelve years
+old she had quite the air of a little old fairy. Now, at seventeen,
+matters are mended. Her complexion has cleared; her countenance, her
+figure, has shot up into height and brightness, and a sort of rustic
+grace; her bright, acute eye is softened and sweetened by the womanly
+wish to please; her hair is trimmed, and curled, and brushed with
+exquisite neatness; and her whole dress arranged with that nice
+attention to the becoming, the suitable both in form and texture,
+which would be called the highest degree of coquetry, if it
+did not deserve the better name of propriety. Never was such a
+transmogrification beheld. The lass is really pretty, and Ned Miles
+has discovered that she is so. There he stands, the rogue, close at
+her aide, (for he hath joined her whilst we have been telling her
+little story, and the milking is over!)--there he stands--holding her
+milk-pail in one hand, and stroking Watch with the other; whilst she
+is returning the compliment, by patting Neptune's magnificent head.
+There they stand, as much like lovers as may be; he smiling, and she
+blushing--he never looking so handsome, nor she so pretty, in all
+their lives. There they stand, in blessed forgetfulness of all except
+each other--as happy a couple as ever trod the earth. There they
+stand, and one would not disturb them for all the milk and butter in
+Christendom. I should not wonder if they were fixing the wedding-day.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+RECOLLECTIONS OF A R*T.
+
+_(Concluded from page 365.)_
+
+
+Finding a detachment just setting out to join the Grand Allied Army, I
+thought, as a true Briton, I could do no less than accompany it, and
+prevailed upon all our party to do the same.
+
+The detachment with which I marched, consisted of 80,000. As we had
+little baggage, having crossed the Rhine, we proceeded rapidly through
+a dull, uninteresting country.
+
+The town of Coblentz is situated at the junction of the Rhine
+and the Moselle. Here the majestic Rhine gently flows along in
+all its grandeur, separating the town from the noble fortress of
+Ehrenbreitstein.[1] I crossed over the bridge of boats, and made
+a most minute inspection of this very romantic castle, which gave
+me great pleasure indeed. In a few days I availed myself of a
+passage-boat which was going to Mayence, and was quite enraptured with
+the view on all sides. Rhenish wines, and perhaps also the water,
+I found did not well agree with my stomach; and no inconsiderable
+annoyance, I soon experienced. They seemed, however, to have exactly
+the same effect upon every Englishman I saw, so I was not singular. A
+little brandy soon, however, put me all to rights; and by the time I
+reached Strasbourg, I was perfectly well again, and able to do ample
+justice to her Splendid Pies! I attended high mass in the great
+Cathedral of Strasbourg, and was surprised and pleased at the sight
+of 10,000 soldiers, in review order, drawn up within its walls. It
+was tiresome enough work mounting to the top of the spire, (which
+I ascertained, by the steps I took, to be exactly 490 feet high,
+Strasbourg measure; and this is exactly eight feet higher than St.
+Peter's at Rome), but I made it out, notwithstanding the sulky looks
+of the jackanapes who lives at the top. Nothing can surpass the beauty
+of the view from this cathedral. At your feet you have the ancient
+town, with all its regular fortifications and outworks--the majestic
+Rhine, with its bridge of boats, and ruined Gothic bridge, sublime in
+its decay--and as far as the eye can reach you have an exceedingly
+rich country, everywhere speckled with towns, and fertilized by
+luxuriant streams.
+
+ [1] Apropos--our _Supplement_ contains a fine Engraving of this
+ very spot.
+
+I made a point of visiting my venerable friend, the old Comte de
+Strasbourg, who, unchanged in the rolling on of centuries, lies in his
+glass coffin, to all appearance in the same freshness of health and
+vigour in which, when myself a very young man, I saw him many hundred
+years ago;[1] his countess, his son, and his daughter, keep him
+company, each in their separate place of repose. Alas, alas! the sight
+made me weep.
+
+ [1] The venerable count died about the year 1519. The glass
+ coffins are still shown.
+
+A few days afterwards, I was rather unexpectedly stopped in my tour.
+For a night I had taken up my residence in the carriage of a young
+Englishman, who that day arrived from Rome, the hostler having assured
+me that he would remain for some time. I did so, as I found it much
+quieter and cooler than the hotel "La ville de Lyon," which was
+overcrowded. In the morning, I thought my friends were merely going a
+short drive, so I kept my seat. We, however, travelled on till night,
+when I heard we were bound for London; but as my companions were very
+agreeable, I thought I might as well accompany them the whole way.
+They seemed to be annoyed at every posthouse with their passports,
+&c.; I was never even asked about the matter. The custom-house gentry,
+in their searches, to be sure, occasionally gave me a little trouble,
+but I was soon up to their tricks. We had an avant-courier constantly
+galloping before us, and we travelled with such expedition that we
+reached London in five days; for my fellow-travellers were idle young
+men of fortune, who are of course always in the greatest hurry for the
+end of a journey, because they don't know what to make of themselves
+when it is over.
+
+I had not then an opportunity of seeing Paris, as we only changed
+horses in it. I have since, however, spent many months there, and have
+always been very much pleased with every thing I saw, particularly the
+Catacombs, which were my favourite lounge. When last in Paris, I made
+a narrow escape with my life, as I tumbled headlong into a cask of
+brandy. I, however, managed to scramble out, with the assistance of a
+bit of cord, which happened to be hanging over its side, and which my
+friend pushed in to me. I was little the worse of my ducking; for, as
+soon as I got out, I was set a-laughing by his telling me how to spell
+_brandy_, in both French and English, in three letters, viz. "B.R. and
+Y." and "O.D.V."
+
+In London I made a point, as a stranger, of going everywhere, and was
+certainly much delighted with every thing. I must confess, however,
+that I thought all the acting at the Opera and Theatres, and all the
+eloquence of the Houses of Parliament, as nothing in comparison of
+what I saw and tasted at the East India and London Docks. When I
+was in the House of Lords, a companion whispered to me, that he had
+heard an act read, offering a reward of 10,000_l._ for a _male_
+tortoise-shell cat. This I believe, indeed, is a very safe offer, for
+such a thing was never heard of. And it is certainly as much worth
+their while as making an act that I should never have more than six
+dishes of meat at my dinner, or that I should not be buried in linen
+above twenty shillings Scots value per ell, although I wished it
+particularly, and could well afford to pay for it. There was, however,
+one restrictive act, which had sense in it; and the husbands of the
+present day would, I dare say, give their ears that it were still in
+force, whatever the dressmakers might think of it. But many of their
+acts of Parliament are silly enough--as they must be; for they don't
+like to be thought idle, and imagine that it is necessary to be always
+enacting something.
+
+It is curious, indeed, how fashion should be every thing in the great
+city. A lady could not possibly venture to see her dearest friend on
+earth, or even her own sister, if she happened to live in rather an
+unfashionable part of the town. By so doing, she would expose herself
+to her own footmen, who very properly would lose all respect for her,
+and I suppose instantly leave her service, as, poor fellows, they have
+a rank in life to keep up!! John Bull certainly gives himself many
+airs, to say the least of it. After receiving the greatest kindness
+and hospitality from you in Scotland, and perhaps staying for months
+in your house, he will cut you dead in London. I remember once meeting
+with such a return, but took it, of course, very coolly. Next day,
+when I was arm in arm with ---- ----, I happened again to meet my
+quondam friend, who immediately rushed up to me--I, however, turned
+on my tail, and did not know him.--Fashion is an odd thing after all.
+It is not rank which will do. I have seen many a spendthrift young
+commoner cut his uncle the duke; and being a duchess by no means
+will ensure admittance at Almack's.--I thank my stars, I am not
+fashionable, and am always happy to see my friends!
+
+I was persuaded, soon after reaching London, to go down to Essex for
+a few days, to pay a visit to an old friend. When I arrived at his
+house, which I think they called Waltham Abbey, I was sorry to receive
+the melancholy accounts that he had been devoured, and that, if I did
+not instantly take myself off, I should be dealt with in the same
+manner. The truth was, that a famine had arisen; and it is well known,
+on those occasions, as necessity has no law, that the stronger kills
+the weaker. Day after day the combat is renewed, till at last all
+except one are destroyed, and he is then obliged to decamp, or eat
+himself up, as he likes best. It is in this way that castles, houses,
+&c. which have been long infested by us, are so suddenly entirely
+freed from our presence.
+
+I amused myself in making an excursion to Epping Forest, till I
+thought the civil war at my late friend's habitation might have
+proceeded far enough for my presence to be useful. In the forest,
+one day, I had the luck to kill one of those troublesome reptiles--a
+Tom Cat. I believe, however, it was a house one. After a hard day's
+hunting his highness made too free at a Valerian party. I watched my
+opportunity, and soon put an effectual end to his caterwauling. When
+I returned to the abbey, I found I was in the best possible time--the
+garrison being reduced to about a dozen, and they so weakened and
+tired out with the constant worrying work they had had, that I was
+myself a complete match for any two of them. In a few days the number
+was only four, and in other two days I was sole lord and master.
+
+[He then returns to town.]
+
+At a friend's house, in Berkeley Square, where I met a distinguished
+party, a scene took place, just such as Pope describes--
+
+ Our courtier walks from dish to dish;
+ Tastes, for his friend, of fowl and fish:
+ "That jelly's rich, that malmsey's healing,
+ Pray dip your whiskers and your tail in."
+ Was ever such a happy swain?
+ He stuffs, and swills, and stuffs again.
+ "I'm quite ashamed--'Tis mighty rude
+ To eat so much; but all's so good!
+ I have a thousand thanks to give,
+ My lord alone knows how to live."--
+ No sooner said, but from the hall
+ Rush chaplain, butler, dogs, and all:
+ "A r--t, a r--t! clap to the door!"--
+
+I, however, made good my exit, and was nothing the worse of a
+practical warning to be more cautious in future.
+
+It would be endless for me to describe all my after voyages and
+travels. Suffice it to say, I have been both east and west, north
+and south; and there is scarcely a part of the habitable globe which
+I have not visited. After all, I have come to this conclusion, that
+there is no country like Britain. Oh! how I could wish my human
+existence had been in such happy times and under such glorious
+sovereigns as a George the Third, and George the Fourth!!!
+
+For some years I have remained in this country, enjoying (like a
+patriarch of old) a quiet, regular life with my family, which now
+amounts to above 2,000. I, however, keep very much to my own room,
+as I hate bustle, and like to enjoy my own reflections.
+
+The age to which our species can exist is not ascertained, as never
+one of us was known to die in his bed, at least a natural death. A
+kind of instinct I have always had, has as yet saved me from arsenic,
+stewed corks, traps, stamps, &c.; and my great strength, and a
+good deal of science, which is of more consequence, have, as yet,
+preserved me in many a deadly combat, both with my own species, and
+with the dog, the ferret, the weasel, the hawk, and that green-eyed
+monster--the cat. But I am now getting somewhat stiffer, and am not
+so sharp as I was. I am not--
+
+ "--qualis eram, quum primam aciem Præneste sub ipsa
+ Stravi, scutorumque incendi victor acervos;
+ Et regem hâc Herilum dextrâ sub Tartara misi!!"
+
+And in some evil hour my time must come.
+
+--I am well aware, indeed, of the fleeting existence even of this
+world itself, for I studied astronomy with the celebrated M. Olbers
+of Bremen, and assisted him in making many useful observations and
+discoveries, particularly regarding comets, in the course of which
+we came to this melancholy conclusion, that the comet which was
+afterwards visible in 1786 and 1795, will, in 83,000 years, approach
+the earth as nearly as the moon; and that in 4,000,000 years it
+will come to within a distance of 7,700 geographical miles;--the
+consequence of which will be (if its attraction be equal to that of
+the earth) the elevation of the waters of the ocean 13,000 feet; that
+is to say, above the tops of all the European mountains, except Mount
+Blanc. The inhabitants of the Andes and of the Himalaya mountains
+alone will escape this second deluge; but they will not benefit by
+their good fortune more than 216,000,000 years, for it is probable,
+that at the expiration of that time, our globe standing right in the
+way of the comet, will receive a shock severe enough to ensure its
+utter destruction!!!
+
+_Note._--After reading over the above MS., I am inclined to come to
+this conclusion--that our historian, while in a human form, must have
+been a Scottish nobleman--that he probably was born about the year
+1501--and that he lived to about the age of 89.--_Ed._
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE FANCY BALL.
+
+
+ "A visor for a visor! what care I
+ What curious eye doth quote deformities!"
+ SHAKSPEARE.
+
+ "You used to talk," said Miss Mac Call,
+ "Of flowers, and flames, and Cupid;
+ But now you never talk at all.
+ You're getting vastly stupid.
+ You'd better burn your Blackstone, Sir,
+ You never will get through it;
+ There's a Fancy Ball at Winchester--
+ Do let us take you to it."
+
+ I made that night a solemn vow,
+ To startle all beholders:
+ I wore white muslin on my brow,
+ Green velvet on my shoulders--
+ My trousers were supremely wide,
+ I learn'd to swear "by Allah"--
+ I stuck a poniard by my side,
+ And called myself "Abdallah."
+
+ Oh! a Fancy Ball's a strange affair,
+ Made up of silks and leathers,
+ Light heads, light heels, false hearts, false hair,
+ Pins, paint, and ostrich feathers:
+ The dullest Duke in all the town,
+ To-night may shine a droll one--
+ And rakes, who have not half-a-crown,
+ Look royal with a whole one.
+
+ Hail, blest Confusion! here are met
+ All tongues, and times, and faces,
+ The Lancers flirt with Juliet,
+ The Bramin talks of races;
+ And where's your genius, bright Corinne?
+ And where your brogue, Sir Lucius?
+ And Chinca Ti, you have not seen
+ One chapter of Confucius.
+
+ Lo! dandies from Kamschatka flirt
+ With beauties from the Wrekin--
+ And belles from Berne look very pert
+ On Mandarins from Pekin;
+ The Cardinal is here from Rome,
+ The Commandant from Seville--
+ And Hamlet's father from the tomb,
+ And Faustus from the Devil.
+
+ What mean those laughing Nuns, I pray,
+ What mean they, Nun or Fairy:
+ I guess they told no beads to-day,
+ And sang no Ave Mary.
+ From Mass and Matins, Priest and Pix,
+ Barred door, and window grated,
+ I wish all pretty Catholics
+ Were thus emancipated.
+
+ Four Seasons come to dance quadrilles,
+ With four well-seasoned sailors--
+ And Raleigh talks of rail-road bills,
+ With Timon, prince of railers.
+ I find Sir Charles of Aubyn Park
+ Equipp'd for a walk to Mecca--
+ And I run away from Joan of Arc,
+ To romp with sad Rebecca.
+
+ Fair Cleopatra's very plain,
+ Puck halts, and Ariel swaggers--
+ And Cæsar's murder'd o'er again,
+ Though not by Roman daggers.
+ Great Charlemagne is four feet high--
+ Sad Stuff has Bacon spoken--
+ Queen Mary's waist is all awry,
+ And Psyche's nose is broken.
+
+ Our happiest bride, how very odd!
+ Is the mourning Isabella,
+ And the heaviest foot that ever trod
+ Is the foot of Cinderella.
+ Here sad Calista laughs outright,
+ There Yorick looks most grave, Sir,
+ And a Templar waves the cross to-night,
+ Who never cross'd the wave, Sir.
+
+ And what a Babel is the talk!
+ "The Giraffe"--"plays the fiddle"--
+ "Macadam's roads"--"I hate this chalk"--
+ "Sweet girl"--"a charming riddle"--
+ "I'm nearly drunk with"--"Epsom salts"--
+ "Yes, separate beds"--"such cronies!"--
+ "Good heaven! who taught that man to valtz?"--
+ "A pair of Shetland ponies."
+
+ "Lord D----" "an enchanting shape"--
+ "Will move for"--"Maraschino"
+ "Pray, Julia, how's your mother's ape?"--
+ "He died at Navarino!"
+ "The gout, by Jove, is"--"apple pie"--
+ "Don Miguel"--"Tom the tinker"--
+ "His Lordship's pedigree's as high
+ As ----" "Whipcord, dam by Clinker."
+
+ "Love's shafts are weak"--"my chestnut kicks"--
+ "Heart broken;"--"broke the traces"--
+ "What say you now of politics?"--
+ "Change sides and to your places"--
+ "A five-barred gate"--"a precious pearl"
+ "Grave things may all be punn'd on!"--
+ "The Whigs, thank God, are"--"out of curl!"--
+ "Her age is"--"four by London!"
+
+ Thus run the giddy hours away,
+ Till morning's light is beaming,
+ And we must go to dream by day
+ All we to-night are dreaming;
+ To smile and sigh, to love and change--
+ Oh! in our heart's recesses,
+ We dress in fancies quite as strange
+ As these our fancy-dresses.
+
+_New Monthly Magazine_.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE GATHERER.
+
+ A snapper up of unconsidered trifles
+ SHAKSPEARE.
+
+ Tho' lang an lonely be the road
+ Between me an my dearie;
+ Yet I the gate hae aften troad,
+ When I've been tired and wearie.
+
+ Be't stormin rain, hail, win or snaw--
+ A lonely road and drearie--
+ There's nought wad e'er keep me awa
+ Frae gaun to see my dearie!!!
+
+M.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+FRENCH BALL CONVERSATION.
+
+During the French revolution, parties danced as gaily as ever; the
+following is a ball conversation, which took place in the month of
+Frimare, year 7.:--Well, the Ottoman Porte has declared war against
+us! Oh yes, there is no doubt of it, (_En avant deux_) It is an enemy
+the more--(_chassez_) and the Russian fleet they say has passed the
+Dardanelles, (_en avant quatre_) yet the papers say that the emperor
+sincerely desires peace.--Yes, but Count Metternich wishes for war,
+(_balancez_) so we have also a new coalition against us. England,
+Portugal, Naples, Turkey, the Emperor, Russia, perhaps the empire
+of Prussia, (_Faites face et chassez tous les huit_)--well we have
+bayonettes, (_la poussette_) besides it is not so far from Dover to
+Calais, (_traversez_)--Do you belong to the conscription?--Yes, and I
+too; (_pirouettez_) what makes me uneasy is to know what will become
+of our partners when we are gone: (_La chaine des dames_)--what will
+be left to amuse them (_La queu du chat_.) It was thus that days of
+terror were preceded by evenings of amusement and pleasure.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+INTUITIVE AFFECTION.
+
+"There are three things," said a wit, "which I have always loved
+without ever understanding them, painting, music, and woman."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+RETORT UNCOURTEOUS.
+
+A lady, well known in the fashionable vicinity of Portland-place,
+always accosts a stranger, with "I think I have seen you somewhere,"
+which often leads to a clue for her finding out the history of the
+party. One evening she played off the same game on a gentleman, who
+replied, "Most likely, madam, for I sometimes go there."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+With the present Number is published the SECOND SUPPLEMENT of
+the Spirit of the Annuals--containing Poetry and Prose by Allan
+Cunningham, Professor Wilson, the late P.B. Shelley, Miss Landon,
+Mrs. Hemans, Mr. Pringle, Theodore Hook, and other distinguished
+Writers--with a beautiful Engraving.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Purchasers of the MIRROR, who may wish to complete their sets are
+informed, that every volume is complete in itself, and may be
+purchased separately. The whole of the numbers are now in print, and
+can be procured by giving an order to any Bookseller or Newsvender.
+
+Complete sets Vol. I. to XI. in boards, price £2. 19s. 6d. half bound,
+£3. 17s.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+_LIMBIRD'S EDITIONS._
+
+CHEAP and POPULAR WORKS published at the MIRROR OFFICE in the Strand,
+near Somerset House.
+
+The ARABIAN NIGHTS' ENTERTAINMENTS, Embellished with nearly 150
+Engravings. Price 6s. 6d. boards.
+
+The TALES of the GENII. Price 2s.
+
+The MICROCOSM. By the Right Hon. G. CANNING, &c. Price 2s.
+
+PLUTARCH'S LIVES, with Fifty Portraits, 2 vols. price 13s. boards.
+
+COWPER'S POEMS, with 12 Engravings, price 3s. 6d. boards.
+
+COOK'S VOYAGES, 2 vols. price 8s. boards.
+
+The CABINET of CURIOSITIES: or WONDERS of the WORLD DISPLAYED Price
+5s. boards.
+
+BEAUTIES of SCOTT. 2 vols. price 7s. boards.
+
+The ARCANA of SCIENCE for 1828. Price 4s. 6d.
+
+*** Any of the above Works can be purchased in Parts.
+
+GOLDSMITH'S ESSAYS. Price 8d.
+
+DR. FRANKLIN'S ESSAYS. Price 1s. 2d.
+
+BACON'S ESSAYS. Price 8d.
+
+SALMAGUNDI. Price 1s. 8d.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+_Printed and Published by J. LIMBIRD 143, Strand, (near Somerset
+House,) London; sold by ERNEST FLEISCHER, 626, New Market, Leipsic;
+and by all Newsmen and Booksellers._
+
+
+
+***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MIRROR OF LITERATURE, AMUSEMENT,
+AND INSTRUCTION, VOL. 12, ISSUE 345, DECEMBER 6, 1828***
+
+
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+<title>The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Mirror of Literature, Amusement, and Instruction, Vol. 12, Issue 345, December 6, 1828, by Various</title>
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+<h1>The Project Gutenberg eBook, The Mirror of Literature, Amusement, and
+Instruction, Vol. 12, Issue 345, December 6, 1828, by Various</h1>
+<pre>
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at <a href = "https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a></pre>
+<p>Title: The Mirror of Literature, Amusement, and Instruction, Vol. 12, Issue 345, December 6, 1828</p>
+<p>Author: Various</p>
+<p>Release Date: January 14, 2004 [eBook #10719]</p>
+<p>Language: English</p>
+<p>Character set encoding: iso-8859-1</p>
+<p>***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MIRROR OF LITERATURE, AMUSEMENT, AND INSTRUCTION, VOL. 12, ISSUE 345, DECEMBER 6, 1828***</p>
+<center><h3>E-text prepared by Jonathan Ingram, William Flis,<br />
+ and Project Gutenberg Distributed Proofreaders</h3></center>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<span class="pagenum"><a id="page385" name="page385"></a>[pg
+385]</span>
+<h1>THE MIRROR<br />
+OF<br />
+LITERATURE, AMUSEMENT, AND INSTRUCTION.</h1>
+<hr class="full" />
+<table width="100%">
+<tr>
+<td align="left"><b>Vol. XII. No. 345.</b></td>
+<td align="center"><b>SATURDAY, DECEMBER 6, 1828.</b></td>
+<td align="right"><b>[PRICE 2d.</b></td>
+</tr>
+</table>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>The Arch of Constantine, at Rome.</h2>
+<div class="figure" style="width:100%;"><a href=
+"images/345-1.png"><img width="100%" src="images/345-1.png" alt=
+"" /></a></div>
+<p>"Still harping" on the Fine Arts&mdash;<i>Architecture</i> and
+<i>Painting</i>. Of the former, the above engraving is an
+illustration; and of the latter, our readers will find a beautiful
+subject (from one of <i>Turner's</i> pictures) in a <i>Supplement
+published with the present Number</i>.<a id="footnotetag1" name=
+"footnotetag1"></a><a href="#footnote1"><sup>1</sup></a></p>
+<p>The Arches of Rome were splendid monuments of triumph, erected
+in honour of her illustrious generals. They were at first very
+simple, being built of brick or hewn stone, and of a semicircular
+figure; but afterwards more magnificent, built of the finest
+marble, and of a square figure, with a large, arched gate in the
+middle, and two small ones on each side, adorned with columns and
+statues. In the vault of the middle gate, hung winged figures of
+victory, bearing crowns in their hands, which, when let down, they
+placed on the victor's head, when he passed in triumph.</p>
+<p>The <i>Arch of Constantine</i>, the most noble of all of these
+structures, subsists almost entire. It was erected by the senate
+and Roman people, in honour of Constantine, after his victory over
+Maxentius, and crosses the Appian Way, at <span class=
+"pagenum"><a name="page386" id="page386"></a>[pg 386]</span> the
+junction of the Coelian and Palatine Hills. Here it stands as the
+last monument of Roman triumph, or like the December sun of "the
+world's sole monument."</p>
+<p>This building consists of three arches, of which the centre is
+the largest; and has two fronts, each adorned with four columns of
+giallo antico marble, of the Corinthian order, and fluted,
+supporting a cornice, on which stand eight Dacian captives of
+Pavonazzetta, or violet-coloured marble.</p>
+<p>The inscription on both sides of the architrave imports, that it
+was dedicated "to the Emperor C&aelig;sar Flavius Constantine
+Augustus, the greatest, pious, and the happy; because by a divine
+impulse, the greatness of his courage, and the aid of his army, he
+avenged the republic by his just arms, and, at the same time,
+rescued it from the tyrant and his whole faction." On one side of
+the arch are the words, "Liberatori urbis," to the deliverer of the
+city; and on the other, "Fundatori quietis," to the founder of
+public tranquillity.</p>
+<p>Although erected to the honour of Constantine, this arch
+commemorates the victories of Trajan, some of the basso-relievos,
+&amp;c. having been pilfered from one of the arches of Trajan. This
+accounts for the Dacian captives, whose heads Lorenzo de Medicis
+broke off and conveyed to Florence, but the theft might not have
+been so notorious to posterity, had not the artists of
+Constantine's time added some figures of inferior merit. Forsyth
+says, "Constantine's reign was notorious for architectural
+robbery;" and the styles of the two emperors, in the present arch,
+mar the harmony by their unsightly contrasts.</p>
+<p>Although the decree for erecting this arch was, without doubt,
+passed immediately after the defeat of Maxentius, it appears from
+the monument itself, that the building was not finished and
+dedicated till the tenth year of Constantine's reign, or the year
+of Christ 315 or 316.</p>
+<p>The newly-erected arch opposite the entrance to Hyde Park is
+from the Roman arch, though, we believe, not from any particular
+model. In the View of the New Palace, St. James's Park, (in our No.
+278,) the arch, to be called the Waterloo Monument, and erected in
+the middle of the area of the palace, will be nearly a copy of that
+of Constantine at Rome. In the court-yard of the Tuilleries at
+Paris, there is a similar arch, copied from that of Septimius
+Severus. This was formerly surmounted by the celebrated group of
+the horses of St. Mark, pilfered from Venice, but restored at the
+peace of 1815.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>THE BEGGAR'S DAUGHTER OF BETHNAL GREEN.</h2>
+<h4><i>(For the Mirror.)</i></h4>
+<p>The popular ballad of "The Beggar's Daughter of Bednall-Greene"
+was written in the reign of Queen Elizabeth. It is founded, though
+without the least appearance of truth, or even probability, on a
+legend of the time of Henry III. Henry de Montfort, son of the
+ambitious Earl of Leicester, who was slain with his father at the
+memorable battle of Evesham, is the hero of the tale. He is
+supposed (according to the legend) to have been discovered among
+the bodies of the slain by a young lady, in an almost lifeless
+state, and deprived of sight by a wound, which he had received
+during the engagement. Under the fostering hand of this "faire
+damosel" he soon recovered, and afterwards marrying her, she became
+the mother of "the comelye and prettye Bessee." Fearing lest his
+rank and person should be discovered by his enemies, he disguised
+himself in the habit of a beggar, and took up his abode at
+Bethnal-Green. The beauty of his daughter attracted many suitors,
+and she was at length married to a noble knight, who, regardless of
+her supposed meanness and poverty, had the courage to make her his
+wife, her other lovers having deserted her on account of her low
+origin. Before entering, however, upon the ballad, it may not,
+perhaps, be thought irrelevant to give a brief sketch of the family
+of the De Montforts.</p>
+<p>Simon de Montfort, created Earl of Leicester by Henry III., was
+the younger son of Simon de Montfort, the renowned but cruel
+commander of the croisade against the Albigenses. This nobleman was
+greatly honoured by Henry III., to whose sister, the Countess
+Dowager of Pembroke, he paid his addresses, and was married, with
+the consent of her brother. For the favour thus shown him by his
+sovereign, he, however, proved ungrateful: his inordinate ambition,
+cloaked by a pretended zeal for reform, was the cause of those
+rebellions which, in the reign of Henry III., kept the kingdom in
+such a continued turmoil. The different oppressions and successes
+of the confederate barons, who at length got possession of the
+king's person, and the civil wars which ensued, are so well known
+as to render any remark on the subject superfluous; suffice it to
+say, that the disputes between the malcontents and the royal party
+were at length terminated by the battle of Evesham, which decided
+in favour of the latter. In this field fell the Earl of Leicester
+and his eldest son, Henry de Montfort. His death was followed by
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page387" id="page387"></a>[pg
+387]</span> the total ruin of his family; his titles and estates
+were all confiscated; the countess, his wife, who had been
+extremely active in her designs against the royalists, was
+banished, together with her sons, Simon and Guy, who afterwards
+assassinated their cousin, Henry d'Allmane, when he was
+endeavouring to effect a reconciliation between them and their
+uncle, Henry IV. The head of the earl was sent as a signal of the
+victory by Roger de Mortimer to the countess; but his body,
+together with that of his son Henry, was interred in the Abbey of
+Evesham; thus leaving the improbability of the legend without a
+shadow of doubt.</p>
+<p>As our limits will not allow us to quote the whole of the
+ballad,<a id="footnotetag2" name="footnotetag2"></a><a href=
+"#footnote2"><sup>2</sup></a> we must content ourselves with giving
+the song of the beggar, which, as well as being the most
+interesting, contains the whole of the legend concerning de
+Montfort:&mdash;</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>A poore beggar's daughter did dwell on a greene,</p>
+<p>Who for her fairnesse might well be a queene:</p>
+<p>A blithe bonny lasse, and a daintye was shee,</p>
+<p>And many one called her pretty Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Her father hee had noe goods nor noe land,</p>
+<p>But begg'd for a penny all day with his hand;</p>
+<p>And yett to her marriage he gave thousands three,</p>
+<p>And still he hath somewhat for pretty Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>And if any one here her birth doe disdaine,</p>
+<p>Her father is ready, with might and with maine,</p>
+<p>To prove shee is come of noble degree&mdash;</p>
+<p>Therefore, ever flout att prettye Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<hr class="short" /></div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Then give me leave, nobles and gentles, each one,</p>
+<p>One song more to sing, and then I have done;</p>
+<p>And if that itt may not winn good report,</p>
+<p>Then doe not give me a GROAT for my sport.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Sir Simon de Montfort my subject shall bee.</p>
+<p>Once chiefe of all the great barons was hee&mdash;</p>
+<p>Yet fortune so cruelle this lorde did abase,</p>
+<p>Now loste and forgotten are hee and his race.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>When the barons in armes did King Henrye oppose,</p>
+<p>Sir Simon de Montfort their leader they chose&mdash;</p>
+<p>A leader of courage undaunted was hee,</p>
+<p>And oft-times he made their enemyes flee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>At length in the battle on Eveshame plaine</p>
+<p>The barons were routed, and Montfort was slaine;</p>
+<p>Moste fatall that battel did prove unto thee,</p>
+<p>Thoughe thou wast not borne then, my prettye Bessee!</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Along with the nobles that fell at that tyde,</p>
+<p>His eldest son Henrye, who fought by his side,</p>
+<p>Was fellde by a blowe he receiv'de in the fighte!</p>
+<p>A blowe that depriv'de him for ever of sight.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Among the dead bodyes all lifelesse he laye,</p>
+<p>Till evening drewe on of the following daye,</p>
+<p>When by a yong ladye discover'd was hee&mdash;</p>
+<p>And this was thy mother, my prettye Bessee!</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>A baron's faire daughter stept forth in the nighte,</p>
+<p>To search for her father, who fell in the fight,</p>
+<p>And seeing yong Montfort, where gasping he laye,</p>
+<p>Was moved with pitye, and broughte him awaye.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>In secrette she nurst him, and swaged his paine,</p>
+<p>While he throughe the realme was beleev'd to be slaine:</p>
+<p>At lengthe his faire bride she consented to bee,</p>
+<p>And made him glad father of prettye Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>And nowe, lest oure foes our lives sholde betraye</p>
+<p>We clothed ourselves in beggars' arraye;</p>
+<p>Her jewells shee solde, and hither came wee&mdash;</p>
+<p>All our comfort and care was our prettye Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>And here have wee lived in fortunes despite,</p>
+<p>Thoughe poore, yet contented with humble delighte;</p>
+<p>Full forty winters thus have I beene</p>
+<p>A silly blind beggar of Bednall-greene.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>And here, noble lordes, is ended the song</p>
+<p>Of one that once to your owne ranke did belong:</p>
+<p>And thus have you learned a secrette from mee,</p>
+<p>That ne'er had beene knowne but for prettye Bessee.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>At Bethnal-Green is an old mansion, which, in the survey of
+1703, was called <i>Bethnal-Green-House</i>, and which the
+inhabitants, with their usual love of traditionary lore, assign as
+the "Palace of the Blind Beggar." This house was erected in the
+reign of Queen Elizabeth, by John Kirby, citizen of London, and
+was, says Stow,<a id="footnotetag3" name=
+"footnotetag3"></a><a href="#footnote3"><sup>3</sup></a> "lofty
+like a castle." It was afterwards the residence of Sir Hugh Platt,
+Knight, the author of many ingenious works; from him it came into
+the possession of Sir William Ryder, Knight, who died there in
+1669; of late years it has been used as a private madhouse. The
+tradition of the beggar is still preserved on the sign-posts of
+several of the public-houses in the neighbourhood.</p>
+<p>S.I.B.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>HISTORY AND ANTIQUITY OF WILLS.</h2>
+<h4>(<i>For the Mirror.</i>)</h4>
+<p>According to Blackstone, wills are of high antiquity. We find
+them among the ancient Hebrews; not to mention what Eusebius and
+others have related of Noah's testament, made in writing, and
+witnessed under his seal, by which he disposed of the whole world.
+A more authentic instance of the early use of testaments occurs in
+the sacred writings, (Genesis, chap. xlviii.) in which Jacob
+bequeaths to his son Joseph, a portion of his inheritance, double
+to that of his brethren.</p>
+<p>The Grecian practice concerning wills (says Potter) was not the
+same in all <span class="pagenum"><a name="page388" id=
+"page388"></a>[pg 388]</span> places; some states permitted men to
+dispose of their estates, others wholly deprived them of that
+privilege. We are told by Plutarch, that Solon is much commended
+for his law concerning wills; for before his time no man was
+allowed to make any, but all the wealth of deceased persons
+belonged to their families; but he permitted them to bestow it on
+whom they pleased, esteeming friendship a stronger tie than
+kindred, and affection than necessity, and thus put every man's
+estate in the disposal of the possessor; yet he allowed not all
+sorts of wills, but required the following conditions in all
+persons that made them:&mdash;</p>
+<p>1st. That they must be citizens of Athens, not slaves, or
+foreigners, for then their estates were confiscated for the public
+use.</p>
+<p>2nd. That they must be men who have arrived to twenty years of
+age, for women and men under that age were not permitted to dispose
+by will of more than one <i>medimn</i> of barley.</p>
+<p>3rd. That they must not be adopted; for when adopted persons
+died without issue, the estates they received by adoption returned
+to the relations of the men who adopted them.</p>
+<p>4th. That they should have no male children of their own, for
+then their estate belonged to these. If they had only daughters,
+the persons to whom the inheritance was bequeathed were obliged to
+marry them. Yet men were allowed to appoint heirs to succeed their
+children, in case these happened to die under twenty years of
+age.</p>
+<p>5th. That they should be in their right minds, because
+testaments extorted through the phrenzy of a disease, or dotage of
+old age, were not in reality the wills of the persons that made
+them.</p>
+<p>6th. That they should not be under imprisonment, or other
+constraint, their consent being then only forced, nor in justice to
+be reputed voluntary.</p>
+<p>7th. That they should not be induced to it by the charms and
+insinuations of a wife; for (says Plutarch) the wise lawgiver with
+good reason thought that no difference was to be put between deceit
+and necessity, flattery and compulsion, since both are equally
+powerful to persuade a man from reason.</p>
+<p>Wills were usually signed before several witnesses, who put
+seals to them for confirmation, then placed them in the hands of
+trustees, who were obliged to see them performed. At Athens, some
+of the magistrates were very often present at the making of wills.
+Sometimes the <i>archons</i> were also present. Sometimes the
+testator declared his will before sufficient witnesses, without
+committing it to writing. Thus Callias, fearing to be cut off by a
+wicked conspiracy, is said to have made an open declaration of his
+will before the popular assembly at Athens. There were several
+copies of wills in Diogenes Laertius, as those of Aristotle, Lycon,
+and Theophrastus; whence it appears they had a common form,
+beginning with a wish for life and health.</p>
+<p>The most ancient testaments among the Romans were made
+<i>viv&acirc; voce</i>, the testator declaring his will in the
+presence of seven witnesses; these they called <i>nuncupative</i>
+testaments; but the danger of trusting the will of the dead to the
+memory of the living soon abolished these; and all testaments were
+ordered to be in writing.</p>
+<p>The Romans were wont to set aside testaments, as being
+<i>inofficiosa</i>, deficient in natural duty, if they disinherited
+or totally passed by (without assigning a true and sufficient
+reason) any of the children of the testator. But if the child had
+any legacy, though ever so small, it was a proof that the testator
+had not lost his memory nor his reason, which otherwise the law
+presumed. Hence probably (says Blackstone) has arisen that
+groundless, vulgar error of the necessity of leaving the heir a
+shilling, or some other express legacy, in order to effectually
+disinherit him; whereas the law of England, though the heir, or
+next of kin, be totally omitted, admits no <i>querela
+inofficiosa</i>, to set aside such testament.</p>
+<p>Alfred the Great made a will, wherein he declared, in express
+terms, that it was just the English should be as free as their own
+thoughts.</p>
+<p>P.T.W.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>The Cosmopolite.</h2>
+<h3>DANCING.</h3>
+<h4><i>(For the Mirror.)</i></h4>
+<p>Dancing is defined to be "to move in measure; to move with steps
+correspondent to the sound of instruments." But there are other
+species of dancing&mdash;as</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;for
+three long months</p>
+<p>To <i>dance attendance</i> for a word of audience:</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>and to dance with pain, or when, as Lord Bacon says, "in
+pestilences, the malignity of the infecting vapour danceth the
+principal spirits." The <i>Chorea S. Viti</i>, or <i>St. Vitus's
+Dance</i> is another variation, said to have once prevailed
+extensively, and to have been cured by a prayer to this saint!
+whose martyrdom is commemorated on June 15. It may not be generally
+known that a person afflicted with this species of dancing can
+<i>run</i>, although he cannot walk or stand still. Another
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page389" id="page389"></a>[pg
+389]</span> and a more agreeable species is to <i>lead the
+dance</i>, an unjust usurpation which is practised in a thousand
+other places beside the ball-room.</p>
+<p>According to the mythologists, (authorities always quotable, and
+nobody knows why,) the Curetes or Corybantes, a people of Crete,
+who were <i>produced from rain</i>, first invented the dance to
+amuse the infant Jupiter&mdash;with what success he danced we know
+not, for when a year old he waged war against the Titans, and then
+his dancing days must have terminated.</p>
+<p>A history of dancing is, however, not to our purpose; but a few
+of its eccentricities. It occurs in the customs of all people,
+either as a recreation or as a religious ceremony&mdash;held in
+contempt by some, and in esteem by others. David danced before the
+ark; the daughters of Shiloh danced in a solemn yearly festival;
+and the Israelites, (good judges) danced round the golden calf.</p>
+<p>The ancients had a peculiar <i>penchant</i> for dancing, whether
+in person or by animals; and the feats of the latter distance all
+the wretched efforts of the bears, dogs, and horses of our days.
+The attempts of Galba to amuse the Roman people throw into the
+shade all the peace-rejoicings and illuminations of St. James's and
+the Green Parks. Suetonius, Seneca, and Pliny tell us of
+<i>elephants</i> in their time that were taught to walk the rope,
+backwards and forwards, up and down, with the agility of an Italian
+rope-dancer. Such was the confidence reposed in the docility and
+dexterity of the animal, that a person sat upon an elephant's back,
+while he walked across the theatre upon a rope, extended from the
+one side to the other. Lipsius, who has collected these
+testimonies, thinks them too strong to be doubted&mdash;perhaps
+even stronger than the rope. Scaliger corroborates all of them;
+Busbequius <i>saw</i> an elephant dance a <i>pas seul</i> at
+Constantinople; and Suetonius tells us of twelve elephants, six
+male and six female, who were clothed like men and women, and
+performed a country dance, in the reign of Tiberius. In later
+times, horses have been taught to dance. In the carousals of Louis
+XIII. there were dances of horses; and in the 13th century, some
+rode a horse upon a rope. All this eclipses the puny modern feats
+of Astley and Ducrow.<a id="footnotetag4" name=
+"footnotetag4"></a><a href="#footnote4"><sup>4</sup></a></p>
+<p>The Greeks and Romans were divided upon the propriety of
+dancing. Socrates who held death in contempt, when a reverend old
+gentleman, learned to dance of Aspasia, the beautiful nurse of
+Grecian eloquence. The Romans forgot their loss of the republic and
+of liberty&mdash;</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;the
+air we breathe</p>
+<p>If we have it not we die.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>in seeing Pylades and Bathyllus dance before them in their
+theatres&mdash;an indifference of which we were reminded on hearing
+that the Parisians sat in the <i>Caf&eacute;s</i> on the Boulevard
+du Italiens&mdash;sipping coffee and sucking down ice, during the
+capitulation of the city, and while the French, killed and wounded,
+were conveyed along the road before them.</p>
+<p>Cato, <i>Censorius</i>, danced at the age of fifty-six. Cicero,
+however, reproached a consul with having danced. Tiberius, that
+monster of indulgences, banished dancers from Rome; and Domitian,
+the illustrious fly-catcher, expelled several of his <i>members of
+parliament</i> for having danced. We are much more civilized, for
+such an edict as that of Domitian would clear our senate-houses as
+effectually as when Cromwell turned out the Long Parliament.</p>
+<p>Among the Italians and the French even there have been found
+enemies to dancing. Alfieri, the poet, had a great aversion to
+dancing; and one Daneau wrote a Trait&eacute; des Danses, in which
+he maintains that "the devil never invented a more effectual way
+than dancing, to fill the world with &mdash;&mdash;." The bishop of
+Noyon once presided at some deliberations respecting a minuet; and
+in 1770, a reverend prelate presented a document on dancing to the
+king of France. The Quakers consider dancing below the dignity of
+the Christian character; and an enthusiast, of another creed,
+thinks all lovers of the stage belong to the schools of Voltaire
+and Hume, and that dancing is a link in the chain of seduction.
+Stupid, leaden-heeled people, who constantly mope in melancholy,
+and neither enjoy nor impart pleasure, will naturally be enemies to
+dancing; and such we are induced to think the majority of these
+opponents.</p>
+<p>The French are inveterate dancers. They have their <i>bals
+par&eacute;s</i> and their <i>salons de danse</i> in every street;
+and as long as the weather will permit, they dance on platforms out
+of doors, and a heavy shower of rain will scarcely cool their
+ardour in the recreation. Some of their stage <i>figurantes</i>
+resemble aerial beings rather than bone and blood, for flesh may
+almost be left out of the composition. But the Italians are a
+nation of dancers as well as the children of song, and they seem to
+have followed the noble <span class="pagenum"><a name="page390" id=
+"page390"></a>[pg 390]</span> example of old Cato, in this respect,
+with better effect than they have studied his virtue. We are also
+told upon good authority, that the American dancers equal any of
+the European <i>figurantes</i>.</p>
+<p>The English people have always been lovers of dancing; and it
+forms an accompaniment of almost all their old sports and pastimes.
+Witness the maypoles, wassails, and wakes of rural life, and the
+grotesque morris-dance, originating in a kind of Pyrrhic or
+military dance, and described by Sir William Temple as composed of
+"ten men, who danced a maid marian and a tabor and pipe." In the
+time of Henry VII. dancers were remarkably well paid; for in some
+of his accounts in the Exchequer, we find</p>
+<pre>
+ &pound;. <i>s.</i> <i>d.</i>
+ Paid to a spye, in reward----------------- 2 0 0
+ To Pechie, the fool, in rewarde----------- 0 6 8
+ To Richard Beden, for writing of bokes---- 0 10 0
+ <i>To the young dameysell that daunceth</i>------ 30 0 0
+</pre>
+<p>In Shakspeare's time, to <i>dance</i> was an elegant
+accomplishment. Thus in the "Merry Wives of Windsor," "What say you
+to young Mr. Fenton? He capers, he <i>dances</i>, he has eyes of
+youth, he writes verses." Locke thus alludes to the graceful
+motions which dancing lends to the human frame: "the legs of the
+dancing-master, and the fingers of a musician, fall, as it were,
+naturally, without thought or pains, into regular and admirable
+motions."</p>
+<p>It must be somewhat surprising to those who over-rate the
+matter-of-fact character of the English people, that so great a
+majority of them are attached to <i>dancing</i>. Among rank and
+wealth this amusement admits of a finer display of beauty and
+artificial decoration than almost any other recreation; for nothing
+can be more splendid than a brilliantly illuminated and well-filled
+ball-room. Dancing among the middle classes of society is equally
+mirthful though not of so ostentatious a character, and it is a
+question whether the latter, being free from the alloy of
+fashionable follies, are not more exhilarated by sweet sounds than
+their wealthy superiors. But the mushroom aristocracy and pride of
+purse often operate as checks to the enjoyment of both these
+classes; and splendid dancing accommodations sometimes put an end
+to the amusement. At Dorking, in Surrey, attached to one of the
+inns is a ball-room, which cost the builder &pound;12,000, and here
+is one, or at most three balls during the year, while at scores of
+places within our recollection, of less consequence, there are
+monthly and even weekly balls; and we are inclined to think these
+periodical recreations of great importance to the happiness of
+country towns. But there is a species of intoxication sometimes
+arising from them&mdash;that of dancing all night, to suffer from
+exhaustion and rheumatism on the following day&mdash;an evil easy
+of remedy, by such amusements being more frequent and less
+protracted. The influence on the character of the people would
+probably be that of rendering it more even, from the admixture or
+reciprocation of pleasure and business being more proportional.
+This plan would get rid of much of the ostentation and expense of a
+country ball, and would ultimately prove the best antidote to the
+sins of scandal.</p>
+<p>As we have spoken of public dancing in the time of Henry VII.,
+we will show that the enormous sums paid to <i>artists</i> have
+nourished their conceit to an alarming height. Pitrot, the Vestris
+of his day, was a consummate specimen of this effrontery. At
+Vienna, he chose to appear only in the last act of the ballet. The
+emperor desired him to come forth at the end of the first; Pitrot
+refused; the court left the opera, and then Pitrot told the dancers
+they would have a hop by themselves, which they did. However, this
+was forgiven; and, at his departure, he was presented with the
+emperor's picture, set with brilliants. Pitrot received it with
+<i>sang froid</i>, pressed his thumb upon the crystal, crushed the
+picture to pieces, adding, "Thus I treat men not worthy of my
+friendship." This fellow behaved equally ill in France, Prussia,
+and Russia; but, at length, scouted by all his patrons, and, after
+giving his thousands to opera girls, he wandered about Calais in
+rags and poverty. Farinelli, after accumulating a fortune in
+England, built a superb mansion in Italy, which he called the
+<i>English Folly</i>.<a id="footnotetag5" name=
+"footnotetag5"></a><a href="#footnote5"><sup>5</sup></a></p>
+<p>The oddity of some ideas of dancing is really ludicrous. The
+Cambro-Britains, in a very late period, used to be played out of
+church by a fiddle, and to form a dance in the church-yard at the
+end of the service. But the ideas which the Chinese have of dancing
+exceeds all others. When Commodore Anson was at Canton, the
+officers of the <i>Centurion</i> had a ball upon some court
+holiday: while they were dancing, a Chinese, who very quietly
+surveyed the operation, said, softly, to one of the party, "Why
+don't you let your servants do this for you?"</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page391" id="page391"></a>[pg
+391]</span>
+<h2>Fine Arts.</h2>
+<h3>SCHOOL OF PAINTING AT THE BRITISH INSTITUTION.</h3>
+<h4><i>(To the Editor of the Mirror.)</i></h4>
+<p>I beg to present you with a brief notice of the School of
+Painting at the British Institution, Pall Mall; you may rely upon
+its correctness, as I have been extremely cautious in making my
+notes, and in ascertaining every particular relative to the
+subject.</p>
+<p>The students at this excellent institution have, for several
+weeks, been arduously engaged in copying the fine pictures which
+were entrusted to the directors by his majesty, and the nobility,
+for that purpose. In general, the students have been very
+successful, and deserve much praise; I must, however, in my
+prescribed limits, only mention a few.</p>
+<p>Vandyke's <i>Duchess de St. Croix</i> has been cleverly copied
+by Mr. Boden and Mr. Faulkner; the latter gentleman has well
+imitated the color and the beautiful finish of the original.
+Messrs. Frisk, Child, Howell and M'Call have likewise made clever
+copies of this <i>chef d'oeuvre</i> of art. Many bold efforts have
+been made to copy Hobbima's large <i>Landscape</i>; Mr. Laporte's
+is the most complete, though not quite spirited enough in the
+handling. <i>The Spanish Gentleman</i>, by Velasquez, has engaged
+the pencils of numerous artists, though they have not all been so
+successful as could have been wished; Messrs. Inskipp, Frisk,
+Morton and Child have produced the best <i>fac similes</i>. The
+<i>Lime Kiln</i>, by the younger Teniers, has been carefully
+studied by Mr. Gill, &amp;c.; and Messrs. M'Call and Morton, have
+executed the finest studies from <i>Innocent X.</i>, by Velasquez.
+<i>The Embarkation</i>, by Claude, is extremely well imitated in
+Mr. Cartwright's copy; and the <i>Virgin and Child</i>, which is
+one of Julio Romano's best works, has met with due attention from
+Mr. Farrier, and others. Mr. Novice has executed the only copy from
+DeHooge's fine picture&mdash;<i>A Dutch Family preparing for a
+Walk</i>; and Messrs. Foster and Earl display considerable talent
+in their copies from the <i>Landscape and Cattle</i>, by Cuyp.
+Other admirable works by Guido, Rubens, Bassan, Ruysdael,
+Vanderneer, and Canaletta, have met with a host of imitators, from
+whose talents we may anticipate, at no distant period, pictorial
+excellency of the first order. I should discover a want of
+gallantry, and, indeed, be most unjust, were I not to say that the
+ladies, in nearly all their undertakings, have exerted their utmost
+to excel; those especially, who have executed copies in water
+colours deserve the highest recommendation.</p>
+<p>G.W.N.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>The Anecdote Gallery.</h2>
+<h3>Thaxted Highwaymen.</h3>
+<h4><i>(For the Mirror.)</i></h4>
+<p>The following incident led to the breaking up and dispersion of
+a gang of desperate highwaymen, denominated the Thaxted gang, who
+about sixty years ago used to infest the roads in the neighbourhood
+of Dunmow, Thaxted, and the adjacent towns and villages:&mdash;</p>
+<p>An opulent farmer of Thaxted, being one day at Dunmow market,
+received a considerable sum of money, the produce of grain and
+other marketable articles, which he had that day disposed of; and
+going to the inn where he had left his horse, he ordered it to be
+saddled directly for the purpose of returning home. In those times
+every tradesman, salesman and a greater part of the publicans and
+innkeepers knew what money each other received on a market day. The
+innkeeper at whose house the farmer was in the habit of putting up
+at, said to him, "Why you are not going home to-night, are you,
+with all that money about you? You will stand a chance of getting a
+knock on the head."&mdash;"Let them knock away," answered the
+farmer. "I have never yet been robbed, nor do I think it likely I
+shall be to-night; so, Robert, get my horse ready," calling to the
+hostler. "Well, but have you any weapons of defence?" inquired the
+publican.&mdash;"No, nor none I want," responded the farmer. The
+innkeeper pressed him to take a pair of holster pistols; saying,
+"he might find them handy;" and after a great deal of persuasion,
+he agreed to take <i>one</i>, the publican first loading and
+charging it with ball. The farmer put the pistol in his great coat
+pocket, and was on the point of departure when he recollected that
+he had to get a pound of tea at a grocer's shop in the town, a few
+doors from the inn. He instantly ran to the shop for the tea, and
+while the grocer was serving him he made the same remark as the
+innkeeper had done respecting his going home with so considerable a
+sum as he knew the farmer had about him. The farmer made answer, "I
+am going home to-night, but our friend the publican, has lent me a
+pistol; and if any one interrupts me, I intend to blow his brains
+out."&mdash;"Do you know," said <span class="pagenum"><a name=
+"page392" id="page392"></a>[pg 392]</span> the grocer, "I do not
+like that fellow. Will you let me look at the pistol if you have it
+with you."&mdash;"O yes, look at it if you like. I never fired a
+pistol in my life; however, should I be stopped, I think I could
+manage it." The grocer took the pistol; drew the charge; and found,
+to the great surprise of the farmer, it was only loaded with
+horse-dung, and a large bullet at the top. "I thought he was a
+rascal, and this confirms it." said the grocer. "Here is evidently
+a plot; now leave your money with me; we will load this pistol
+properly, and you can, if you like, proceed on your journey: it may
+be the means of detecting some one."</p>
+<p>The farmer left his money in the hands of the grocer; went back
+to the inn; mounted his horse, and rode off on his journey. About a
+mile from Dunmow, he was stopped by a fellow, well mounted, who
+instantly demanded his money. "I have not got any," replied the
+farmer, "but I have a pistol, with which, if you do not instantly
+allow me to pass on my way home, I will blow your brains out." "You
+have got money&mdash;and as to the pistol, you may blow
+away&mdash;blow away, my fine fellow," said the chuckling
+highwayman. The farmer instantly fired, and his assailant fell off
+his horse to the ground with a groan. The farmer galloped back to
+the inn, and inquired of the hostler where his master was. "He has
+been gone out, on horseback, about a quarter of an hour," the
+hostler replied. "Well, I will tell you what," said the farmer,
+"you may find your master, with his brains blown out, in the road,"
+describing the place where he had had the encounter with the
+innkeeper.</p>
+<p>From this time a number of persons resident in and about Thaxted
+and Dunmow, left their places of abode, which circumstance created
+some surprise among the remaining inhabitants; but it was
+afterwards ascertained they formed the desperate gang that had so
+long and successfully robbed, and sometimes murdered, their
+unsuspecting neighbours and the different travellers who had
+occasion to pass the roads on which these marauders were
+stationed.</p>
+<p>J.W.B.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>Manners &amp; Customs of all Nations.</h2>
+<h4><i>(For the Mirror.)</i></h4>
+<h3>WISE MEN OF GOTHAM.</h3>
+<p>The village of Gotham, about seven miles from Nottingham, has
+been rendered noted by the common proverb of "The Wise Men of
+Gotham." It is observable that a custom has prevailed among many
+nations of stigmatizing the inhabitants of some particular spot as
+remarkable for stupidity. This opprobrious district among the
+Asiatics was Phrygia. Among the Thracians, Abdera; among the
+Greeks, Boeotia; in England it is Gotham. Of the Gothamites
+ironically called <i>The Wise Men of Gotham</i>, many ridiculous
+stories are traditionally told, particularly, that often having
+heard the cuckoo but never seen her, they hedged in a bush from
+whence her note seemed to proceed, so that being confined within so
+small a compass, they might at length satisfy their curiosity; and
+at a place called Court Hill, in this parish, is a bush called
+Cuckoo Bush.</p>
+<p>HALBERT H.</p>
+<hr />
+<h3>MALLARD NIGHT.</h3>
+<p>At All Souls' College, Oxford, the <i>Mallard Night</i> is
+celebrated annually on the 14th of January, in remembrance of a
+very singular circumstance, viz. the discovery of a live and
+excessively large mallard, or drake, supposed to have long ranged
+in a drain or sewer of considerable depth. The only probable
+conjecture respecting its extraordinary situation was, that it had
+fallen when young through the bars or grating at the entrance of
+the drain, (which was of sufficient width to receive it if very
+young,) but was found at a great distance from it, on digging for
+the foundation of the college, (A.D. 1437.) A very humorous account
+of this event was published some years ago by Dr. Buckler,
+subwarden, from a manuscript of Thomas Walsingham, the historian,
+and monk of St. Alban's. It is the cause of much mirth, for on the
+day, and in remembrance of the mallard, many an old and merry song
+is sung.</p>
+<p>E.T.S.</p>
+<hr />
+<h3>WELSH MARRIAGES.</h3>
+<p>It appears to me a matter of no small surprise that so
+economical a people as the English should not have adopted such a
+plan as the following by the lower classes of the Welsh. When a
+young couple intend offering themselves at the Temple of Hymen, if
+they are very poor, they generally send a man, called the bidder,
+round to their acquaintance and friends, who invites them,
+sometimes in rhyme, to the wedding; but if they can afford it, they
+issue circulars. The following is a copy of one:&mdash;</p>
+<p>"<i>June 27, 1827.</i></p>
+<p>"As we intend to enter the matrimonial state on Thursday, the
+19th day of July next, we are encouraged by our friends to make a
+bidding on the occasion, the same day, at the Butchers' Arms,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page393" id="page393"></a>[pg
+393]</span> Carmarthen, when and where the favour of your good and
+agreeable company is humbly solicited; and whatever donation you
+may be pleased to confer on us then, will be thankfully received,
+warmly acknowledged, and cheerfully repaid whenever called for on a
+similar occasion.</p>
+<p>"By your most obedient servants,</p>
+<p>"JOHN JONES.</p>
+<p>"MARY EVANS."</p>
+<p>The persons so invited (if they accept the invitation) generally
+form part of the procession to church, and are preceded by a harper
+or fiddler. After the nuptial knot is tied, they veer their course
+to the public-house mentioned in the bills, where they partake, not
+of a sumptuous banquet, but of the simple, though not the worst,
+fare of bread and cheese and kisses, at the expense of the new
+married folks. After this, a large plate is placed on the table in
+the room, and they proceed to receive the money which each person
+may be disposed to give, whilst one keeps account of the sum and
+names. They frequently receive 50<i>l.</i>, and sometimes, though
+seldom, 100<i>l.</i>; and they have the privilege (by paying the
+duty) of selling the ale to the persons assembled. It is to be
+observed, that the money so deposited cannot be reclaimed by the
+persons who gave it until a similar occasion presents itself in
+their family. By this means the new married couple are enabled to
+procure furniture, and other things requisite for them.</p>
+<p>W.H.</p>
+<hr />
+<h3>CURIOUS FOUNDATION.</h3>
+<p>At Spinney, in Cambridgeshire, was an abbey founded in the reign
+of Henry III. near which was a church, built by Lady Mary
+Bassingburne, and given to the Abbey of Spinney, on condition that
+the monks should support seven aged men with the following
+allowance, viz. one farthing loaf, one herring, and one pennyworth
+of ale per day, and two hundred dry turves, one pair of shoes, one
+woollen garment, and three ells of linen every year. Henry
+Cromwell, second son of Oliver Cromwell, is buried here.</p>
+<p>HALBERT H.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>THE SELECTOR,</h2>
+<h4>AND</h4>
+<h3>LITERARY NOTICES OF</h3>
+<h3><i>NEW WORKS</i></h3>
+<hr />
+<h2>ADVENTURES OF ALLAN-A-SOP.</h2>
+<h4><i>By Sir Walter Scott, Bart.</i></h4>
+<p>The chief of the clan, MacLean of Duart, in the Isle of Mull,
+had an intrigue with a beautiful young woman of his own clan, who
+bore a son to him. In consequence of the child's being, by some
+accident, born in a barn, he received the name of Allan-a-Sop, or
+Allan of the Straw, by which he was distinguished from others of
+his clan. As his father and mother were not married, Allan was of
+course a bastard or natural son, and had no inheritance to look
+for, save that which he might win for himself.</p>
+<p>But the beauty of the boy's mother having captivated a man of
+rank in the clan, called MacLean of Torloisk, he married her, and
+took her to reside with him at his castle of Torloisk, situated on
+the shores of the Sound, or small strait of the sea, which divides
+the smaller island of Ulva from that of Mull. Allan-a-Sop paid his
+mother frequent visits at her new residence, and she was naturally
+glad to see the poor boy, both from affection, and on account of
+his personal strength and beauty, which distinguished him above
+other youths of his age. But she was obliged to confer marks of her
+attachment on him as privately as she could, for Allan's visits
+were by no means so acceptable to her husband as to herself.
+Indeed, Torloisk liked so little to see the lad, that he determined
+to put some affront on him, which should prevent his returning to
+the castle for some time. An opportunity for executing his purpose
+soon occurred.</p>
+<p>The lady one morning, looking from the window, saw her son
+coming wandering down the hill, and hastened to put a girdle cake
+upon the fire, that he might have hot bread to his breakfast.
+Something called her out of the apartment after making this
+preparation, and her husband entering at the same time, saw at once
+what she had been about, and determined to give the boy such a
+reception as should disgust him for the future. He snatched the
+cake from the girdle, thrust it into his step-son's hands, which he
+forcibly closed on the scalding bread, saying, "Here,
+Allan&mdash;here is a cake which your mother has got ready for your
+breakfast." Allan's hands were severely burnt; and, being a
+sharp-witted and proud boy, he resented this mark of his
+step-father's ill-will, and came not again to Torloisk.</p>
+<p>At this time the western seas were covered with the vessels of
+pirates, who, not unlike the sea-kings of Denmark at an early
+period, sometimes settled and made conquests on the islands.
+Allan-a-Sop was young, strong, and brave to desperation. He entered
+as a mariner on board of one of these ships, and in process of time
+obtained the command, first of one galley, then of a small
+flotilla, with which he sailed round the seas and collected
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page394" id="page394"></a>[pg
+394]</span> considerable plunder, until his name became both feared
+and famous. At length he proposed to himself to pay a visit to his
+mother, whom he had not seen for many years; and setting sail for
+this purpose, he anchored one morning in the Sound of Ulva, and in
+front of the house of Torloisk. His mother was dead, but his
+stepfather, to whom he was now an object of fear as he had been
+formerly of aversion, hastened to the shore to receive his
+formidable son-in-law, with great affectation of kindness and
+interest in his prosperity; while Allan-a-Sop, who, though very
+rough and hasty, does not appear to have been sullen or vindictive,
+seemed to take his kind reception in good part.</p>
+<p>The crafty old man succeeded so well, as he thought, in securing
+Allan's friendship, and in obliterating all recollections of the
+former affront put on him, that he began to think it possible to
+employ him in executing his private revenge upon MacKinnon of Ulva,
+with whom, as was usual between such neighbours, he had some feud.
+With this purpose, he offered what he called the following good
+advice to his son-in-law:&mdash;"My dear Allan, you have now
+wandered over the seas long enough; it is time you should have some
+footing upon land, a castle to protect yourself in winter, a
+village and cattle for your men, and a harbour to lay up your
+galleys. Now, here is the island of Ulva, near at hand, which lies
+ready for your occupation, and it will cost you no trouble, save
+that of putting to death the present proprietor, the Laird of
+MacKinnon, a useless old carle, who has cumbered the world long
+enough."</p>
+<p>Allan-a-Sop thanked his stepfather for so happy a suggestion,
+which he declared he would put in execution forthwith. Accordingly,
+setting sail the next morning, he appeared before MacKinnon's house
+an hour before noon. The old chief of Ulva was much alarmed at the
+menacing apparition of so many galleys, and his anxiety was not
+lessened by the news, that they were commanded by the redoubted
+Allan-a-Sop. Having no effectual means of resistance, MacKinnon,
+who was a man of shrewd sense, saw no alternative save that of
+receiving the invaders, whatever might be their purpose, with all
+outward demonstrations of joy and satisfaction. He caused immediate
+preparations to be made for a banquet as splendid as circumstances
+admitted, hastened down to the shore to meet the rover, and
+welcomed him to Ulva with such an appearance of sincerity, that the
+pirate found it impossible to pick any quarrel which might afford a
+pretence for executing the violent purpose which he had been led to
+meditate.</p>
+<p>They feasted together the whole day; and in the evening, as
+Allan-a-Sop was about to retire to his ships, he thanked the Laird
+of MacKinnon for his entertainment, but remarked, with a sigh, that
+it had cost him very dear. "How can that be" said MacKinnon, "when
+I bestowed this entertainment upon you in free
+good-will?"&mdash;"It is true, my friend," replied the pirate, "but
+then it has quite disconcerted the purpose for which I came hither;
+which was to put you to death, my good friend, and seize upon your
+house and island, and so settle myself in the world. It would have
+been very convenient, this island, but your friendly reception has
+rendered it impossible for me to execute my purpose; so that I must
+be a wanderer on the seas for some time longer." Whatever MacKinnon
+felt at hearing that he had been so near to destruction, he took
+care to show no emotion save surprise, and replied to his
+visiter,&mdash;"My dear Allan, who was it that put into your mind
+so unkind a purpose towards your old friend; for I am sure it never
+arose from your own generous nature? It must have been your
+father-in-law, old Torloisk, who made such an indifferent husband
+to your mother, and such an unfriendly stepfather to you when you
+were a helpless boy; but now, when he sees you a bold and powerful
+leader, he desires to make a quarrel betwixt you and those who were
+the friends of your youth. If you consider this matter rightly,
+Allan, you will see that the estate and harbour of Torloisk lie as
+conveniently for you as those of Ulva, and that, if you are to make
+a settlement by force, it is much better it should be at the
+expense of the old churl, who never showed you kindness or
+countenance, than at that of a friend like me, who always loved and
+honoured you."</p>
+<p>Allan-a-Sop was struck with the justice of this reasoning; and
+the old offence of his scalded fingers was suddenly recalled to his
+mind. "It is very true what you say, MacKinnon," he replied, "and,
+besides, I have not forgotten what a hot breakfast my father-in-law
+treated me to one morning. Farewell for the present; you shall soon
+hear news of me from the other side of the Sound." Having said thus
+much, the pirate got on board, and commanding his men to unmoor the
+galleys, sailed back to Torloisk, and prepared to land in arms. His
+father-in-law hastened to meet him, in expectation to hear of the
+death of his enemy, MacKinnon. But Allan greeted him in a very
+different manner from what he expected. <span class=
+"pagenum"><a name="page395" id="page395"></a>[pg 395]</span> "You
+hoary old traitor," he said, "you instigated my simple good-nature
+to murder a better man than yourself. But have you forgotten how
+you scorched my fingers twenty years ago, with a burning cake? The
+day is come that that breakfast must be paid for." So saying, he
+dashed out his father-in-law's brains with a battle-axe, took
+possession of his castle and property, and established there a
+distinguished branch of the clan of MacLean.&mdash;<i>Tales of a
+Grandfather&mdash;Second Series.</i></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>ADVANTAGES OF A GOOD HEART,</h2>
+<h4><i>A Fragment from the "Disowned," by the author of
+"Pelham."</i></h4>
+<p>"The next day, Sir Christopher Findlater called on Clarence.
+'Let us lounge into the park,' said he. 'With pleasure,' replied
+Clarence; and into the park they lounged. By the way they met a
+crowd, who were hurrying a man to prison. The good-hearted Sir
+Christopher stopped&mdash;'Who is that poor fellow?' said he. 'It
+is the celebrated'&mdash;(in England all criminals are celebrated.
+Thurtell was a hero, Thistlewood a patriot, and Fauntleroy was
+discovered to be exactly like Bonaparte)&mdash;'it is the
+celebrated robber, John Jefferies, who broke into Mrs. Wilson's
+house, and cut the throats of herself and her husband, wounded the
+maid-servant, and split the child's skull with the poker.' * * *
+'John Jefferies!' exclaimed the baronet, 'let us come away.'
+'Linden,' continued Sir Christopher, 'that fellow was my servant
+once. He robbed me to some considerable extent. I caught him. He
+appealed to my heart, and you know, my dear fellow, that was
+irresistible, so I let him off. Who could have thought he would
+have turned out so?' And the baronet proceeded to eulogize his own
+good nature, by which it is just necessary to remark, that one
+miscreant had been saved for a few years from transportation in
+order to rob and murder <i>ad libitum</i>, and having fulfilled the
+office of a common pest, to suffer on the gallows at last. What a
+fine thing it is to have a good heart! Both our gentlemen now sunk
+into a reverie, from which they were awakened, at the entrance of
+the park, by a young man in rags, who, with a piteous tone,
+supplicated charity. Clarence, who to his honour be it spoken,
+spent an allotted and considerable part of his income in judicious
+and laborious benevolence, had read a little of political morals,
+then beginning to be understood, and walked on. The good-hearted
+baronet put his hand in his pocket, and gave the beggar
+half-a-guinea, by which a young, strong man, who had only just
+commenced the trade, was confirmed in his imposition for the rest
+of his life; and instead of the useful support, became the
+pernicious incumbrance of society. Sir Christopher had now
+recovered his spirits. 'What's like a good action?' said he to
+Clarence, with a swelling breast. The park was crowded to excess;
+our loungers were joined by Lord St. George. His lordship was a
+staunch Tory. He could not endure Wilkes, liberty, or general
+education. He launched out against the enlightenment of domestics.
+'What has made you so bitter?' said Sir Christopher. 'My valet!'
+cried Lord St. George; 'he has invented a new toasting-fork; is
+going to take out a patent, make his fortune, <i>and leave me</i>;
+that's what I call ingratitude, Sir Christopher; for I ordered his
+wages to be raised five pounds but last year.' 'It <i>was</i> very
+ungrateful,' said the ironical Clarence. 'Very!' reiterated the
+good-hearted Sir Christopher. 'You cannot recommend me a valet,
+Findlater,' renewed his lordship; 'a good, honest, sensible fellow,
+who can neither read nor write?' 'N&mdash;o&mdash;o&mdash;that is
+to say, yes! I can; my old servant, Collard, is out of place, and
+is as ignorant as&mdash;as&mdash;' 'I&mdash;or you are,' said Lord
+St. George, with a laugh. 'Precisely,' replied the baronet. 'Well,
+then, I take your recommendation: send him to me to-morrow at
+twelve.' 'I will,' said Sir Christopher. 'My dear Findlater,' cried
+Clarence, when Lord St. George was gone, 'did you not tell me some
+time ago, that Collard was a great rascal, and closely <i>lie</i>
+with Jefferies? and now you recommend him to Lord St. George!'
+'Hush, hush, hush!' said the baronet; 'he was a great rogue, to be
+sure; but poor fellow, he came to me yesterday with tears in his
+eyes, and said he should starve if I would not give him a
+character; so what could I do?' 'At least, tell Lord St. George the
+truth,' observed Clarence. 'But then Lord St. George would not take
+him!' rejoined the good-hearted Sir Christopher, with forcible
+<i>naivet&eacute;</i>. 'No, no, Linden, we must not be so
+hard-hearted; we must forgive and forget;' and so saying, the
+baronet threw out his chest, with the conscious exultation of a man
+who has uttered a noble sentiment. The moral of this little history
+is, that Lord St. George, having been pillaged 'through thick and
+thin,' as the proverb has it, for two years, at last missed a gold
+watch, and Monsieur Collard finished his career, as his exemplary
+tutor, Mr. John Jefferies, had <span class="pagenum"><a name=
+"page396" id="page396"></a>[pg 396]</span> done before him. Ah!
+what a fine thing it is to have a good heart. But, to return, just
+as our wanderers had arrived at the further end of the park, Lady
+Westborough and her daughter passed them. Clarence excusing himself
+to his friend, hastened towards them, and was soon occupied in
+saying the prettiest things in the world to the prettiest person,
+at least in his eyes; while Sir Christopher, having done as much
+mischief as a good heart well can do in a walk of an hour, returned
+home to write a long letter to his mother, against 'learning and
+all such nonsense, which only served to blunt the affections and
+harden the heart.' 'Admirable young man!' cried the mother, with
+tears in her eyes; 'a good heart is better than all the heads in
+the world.' Amen!"</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h3>SPIRIT OF THE</h3>
+<h2>Public Journals.</h2>
+<h3>QUADRANGLE OF KING'S COLLEGE, CAMBRIDGE.</h3>
+<p>In the last <i>New Monthly Magazine</i> is an excellent account
+of this splendid structure, in <i>A Day at Cambridge</i>,&mdash;in
+which occurs the following exquisite little descriptive
+gem:&mdash;</p>
+<p>With the exception of a gravel walk, running near to the
+buildings on every side, the whole ground-plot of this quadrangle
+is covered by an unbroken turf, kept, by means of constant and
+almost hourly attention, in that exquisite order which is only to
+be observed in spots devoted to similar purposes, here and at
+Oxford. The effect of an unbroken plot of turf of this kind and
+quality, and in a situation like this, is perfectly unique, and
+perhaps indescribable. It is supposed to be, and in fact is, for
+all purposes of preservation and beauty, sacred from the foot of
+man or beast; and the feeling arising from this circumstance, added
+to the exquisite natural adaptation of the object itself to the
+purposes of rest and relief from the almost dazzling architectural
+splendour of the surrounding objects, is such as cannot be
+communicated by any other means whatever, and we might in vain
+attempt to describe. It is of such a kind, however, that those who
+are capable of experiencing it, would as soon think of treading
+upon the object that conveys it to them, as those who honour Nature
+would think of rooting up a nest of violets. Speaking for ourselves
+alone, there is but one thing that can disturb and deteriorate the
+absolute tranquillity of mind, and peace of heart, which fall upon
+us, like dew from heaven, on entering a place like that we have
+attempted to describe above; it is, to see a capped and gowned
+Fellow, profaning with his footsteps the floor of that, in some
+sort, sacred temple, merely because he can, by so doing, reach his
+habitation by a few footsteps less than if he kept to the path
+allotted for him. We look upon the act as a species of impiety; to
+say nothing of its proving, to a demonstration, that the person who
+commits it is either utterly insensible to the mysterious harmony
+that subsists between a certain class of natural objects and the
+heart of man; or utterly disregards that harmony, and sets it at
+naught. He is, in fact, one of whom it may in one sense be said,
+that</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"He hath no music in his soul."</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>And we are almost tempted to complete the quotation, by
+adding&mdash;</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"Let no such man be trusted!"</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<hr />
+<h3>A RUSTIC PAIR.</h3>
+<h4><i>By Miss Mitford</i>.</h4>
+<p>Few damsels of twelve years old, generally a very pretty age,
+were less pretty that Hannah Bint. Short and stunted in her figure,
+thin in face, sharp in feature, with a muddled complexion, wild
+sun-burnt hair, and eyes, whose very brightness had in them
+something startling, over-informed, super-subtle, too clever for
+her age. At twelve years old she had quite the air of a little old
+fairy. Now, at seventeen, matters are mended. Her complexion has
+cleared; her countenance, her figure, has shot up into height and
+brightness, and a sort of rustic grace; her bright, acute eye is
+softened and sweetened by the womanly wish to please; her hair is
+trimmed, and curled, and brushed with exquisite neatness; and her
+whole dress arranged with that nice attention to the becoming, the
+suitable both in form and texture, which would be called the
+highest degree of coquetry, if it did not deserve the better name
+of propriety. Never was such a transmogrification beheld. The lass
+is really pretty, and Ned Miles has discovered that she is so.
+There he stands, the rogue, close at her aide, (for he hath joined
+her whilst we have been telling her little story, and the milking
+is over!)&mdash;there he stands&mdash;holding her milk-pail in one
+hand, and stroking Watch with the other; whilst she is returning
+the compliment, by patting Neptune's magnificent head. There they
+stand, as much like lovers as may be; he smiling, and she
+blushing&mdash;he never looking so handsome, nor she so pretty, in
+all their lives. There they stand, in <span class=
+"pagenum"><a name="page397" id="page397"></a>[pg 397]</span>
+blessed forgetfulness of all except each other&mdash;as happy a
+couple as ever trod the earth. There they stand, and one would not
+disturb them for all the milk and butter in Christendom. I should
+not wonder if they were fixing the wedding-day.</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>RECOLLECTIONS OF A R*T.</h2>
+<h4><i>(Concluded from page 365.)</i></h4>
+<p>Finding a detachment just setting out to join the Grand Allied
+Army, I thought, as a true Briton, I could do no less than
+accompany it, and prevailed upon all our party to do the same.</p>
+<p>The detachment with which I marched, consisted of 80,000. As we
+had little baggage, having crossed the Rhine, we proceeded rapidly
+through a dull, uninteresting country.</p>
+<p>The town of Coblentz is situated at the junction of the Rhine
+and the Moselle. Here the majestic Rhine gently flows along in all
+its grandeur, separating the town from the noble fortress of
+Ehrenbreitstein.<a id="footnotetag6" name=
+"footnotetag6"></a><a href="#footnote6"><sup>6</sup></a> I crossed
+over the bridge of boats, and made a most minute inspection of this
+very romantic castle, which gave me great pleasure indeed. In a few
+days I availed myself of a passage-boat which was going to Mayence,
+and was quite enraptured with the view on all sides. Rhenish wines,
+and perhaps also the water, I found did not well agree with my
+stomach; and no inconsiderable annoyance, I soon experienced. They
+seemed, however, to have exactly the same effect upon every
+Englishman I saw, so I was not singular. A little brandy soon,
+however, put me all to rights; and by the time I reached
+Strasbourg, I was perfectly well again, and able to do ample
+justice to her Splendid Pies! I attended high mass in the great
+Cathedral of Strasbourg, and was surprised and pleased at the sight
+of 10,000 soldiers, in review order, drawn up within its walls. It
+was tiresome enough work mounting to the top of the spire, (which I
+ascertained, by the steps I took, to be exactly 490 feet high,
+Strasbourg measure; and this is exactly eight feet higher than St.
+Peter's at Rome), but I made it out, notwithstanding the sulky
+looks of the jackanapes who lives at the top. Nothing can surpass
+the beauty of the view from this cathedral. At your feet you have
+the ancient town, with all its regular fortifications and
+outworks&mdash;the majestic Rhine, with its bridge of boats, and
+ruined Gothic bridge, sublime in its decay&mdash;and as far as the
+eye can reach you have an exceedingly rich country, everywhere
+speckled with towns, and fertilized by luxuriant streams.</p>
+<p>I made a point of visiting my venerable friend, the old Comte de
+Strasbourg, who, unchanged in the rolling on of centuries, lies in
+his glass coffin, to all appearance in the same freshness of health
+and vigour in which, when myself a very young man, I saw him many
+hundred years ago;<a id="footnotetag7" name=
+"footnotetag7"></a><a href="#footnote7"><sup>7</sup></a> his
+countess, his son, and his daughter, keep him company, each in
+their separate place of repose. Alas, alas! the sight made me
+weep.</p>
+<p>A few days afterwards, I was rather unexpectedly stopped in my
+tour. For a night I had taken up my residence in the carriage of a
+young Englishman, who that day arrived from Rome, the hostler
+having assured me that he would remain for some time. I did so, as
+I found it much quieter and cooler than the hotel "La ville de
+Lyon," which was overcrowded. In the morning, I thought my friends
+were merely going a short drive, so I kept my seat. We, however,
+travelled on till night, when I heard we were bound for London; but
+as my companions were very agreeable, I thought I might as well
+accompany them the whole way. They seemed to be annoyed at every
+posthouse with their passports, &amp;c.; I was never even asked
+about the matter. The custom-house gentry, in their searches, to be
+sure, occasionally gave me a little trouble, but I was soon up to
+their tricks. We had an avant-courier constantly galloping before
+us, and we travelled with such expedition that we reached London in
+five days; for my fellow-travellers were idle young men of fortune,
+who are of course always in the greatest hurry for the end of a
+journey, because they don't know what to make of themselves when it
+is over.</p>
+<p>I had not then an opportunity of seeing Paris, as we only
+changed horses in it. I have since, however, spent many months
+there, and have always been very much pleased with every thing I
+saw, particularly the Catacombs, which were my favourite lounge.
+When last in Paris, I made a narrow escape with my life, as I
+tumbled headlong into a cask of brandy. I, however, managed to
+scramble out, with the assistance of a bit of cord, which happened
+to be hanging over its side, and which my friend pushed in to me. I
+was little the worse of my ducking; for, as soon as I got out, I
+was set a-laughing by his telling me how to spell <i>brandy</i>, in
+both French and English, in three letters, viz. "B.R. and Y." and
+"O.D.V."</p>
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page398" id="page398"></a>[pg
+398]</span>
+<p>In London I made a point, as a stranger, of going everywhere,
+and was certainly much delighted with every thing. I must confess,
+however, that I thought all the acting at the Opera and Theatres,
+and all the eloquence of the Houses of Parliament, as nothing in
+comparison of what I saw and tasted at the East India and London
+Docks. When I was in the House of Lords, a companion whispered to
+me, that he had heard an act read, offering a reward of
+10,000<i>l.</i> for a <i>male</i> tortoise-shell cat. This I
+believe, indeed, is a very safe offer, for such a thing was never
+heard of. And it is certainly as much worth their while as making
+an act that I should never have more than six dishes of meat at my
+dinner, or that I should not be buried in linen above twenty
+shillings Scots value per ell, although I wished it particularly,
+and could well afford to pay for it. There was, however, one
+restrictive act, which had sense in it; and the husbands of the
+present day would, I dare say, give their ears that it were still
+in force, whatever the dressmakers might think of it. But many of
+their acts of Parliament are silly enough&mdash;as they must be;
+for they don't like to be thought idle, and imagine that it is
+necessary to be always enacting something.</p>
+<p>It is curious, indeed, how fashion should be every thing in the
+great city. A lady could not possibly venture to see her dearest
+friend on earth, or even her own sister, if she happened to live in
+rather an unfashionable part of the town. By so doing, she would
+expose herself to her own footmen, who very properly would lose all
+respect for her, and I suppose instantly leave her service, as,
+poor fellows, they have a rank in life to keep up!! John Bull
+certainly gives himself many airs, to say the least of it. After
+receiving the greatest kindness and hospitality from you in
+Scotland, and perhaps staying for months in your house, he will cut
+you dead in London. I remember once meeting with such a return, but
+took it, of course, very coolly. Next day, when I was arm in arm
+with &mdash;&mdash; &mdash;&mdash;, I happened again to meet my
+quondam friend, who immediately rushed up to me&mdash;I, however,
+turned on my tail, and did not know him.&mdash;Fashion is an odd
+thing after all. It is not rank which will do. I have seen many a
+spendthrift young commoner cut his uncle the duke; and being a
+duchess by no means will ensure admittance at Almack's.&mdash;I
+thank my stars, I am not fashionable, and am always happy to see my
+friends!</p>
+<p>I was persuaded, soon after reaching London, to go down to Essex
+for a few days, to pay a visit to an old friend. When I arrived at
+his house, which I think they called Waltham Abbey, I was sorry to
+receive the melancholy accounts that he had been devoured, and
+that, if I did not instantly take myself off, I should be dealt
+with in the same manner. The truth was, that a famine had arisen;
+and it is well known, on those occasions, as necessity has no law,
+that the stronger kills the weaker. Day after day the combat is
+renewed, till at last all except one are destroyed, and he is then
+obliged to decamp, or eat himself up, as he likes best. It is in
+this way that castles, houses, &amp;c. which have been long
+infested by us, are so suddenly entirely freed from our
+presence.</p>
+<p>I amused myself in making an excursion to Epping Forest, till I
+thought the civil war at my late friend's habitation might have
+proceeded far enough for my presence to be useful. In the forest,
+one day, I had the luck to kill one of those troublesome
+reptiles&mdash;a Tom Cat. I believe, however, it was a house one.
+After a hard day's hunting his highness made too free at a Valerian
+party. I watched my opportunity, and soon put an effectual end to
+his caterwauling. When I returned to the abbey, I found I was in
+the best possible time&mdash;the garrison being reduced to about a
+dozen, and they so weakened and tired out with the constant
+worrying work they had had, that I was myself a complete match for
+any two of them. In a few days the number was only four, and in
+other two days I was sole lord and master.</p>
+<p>[He then returns to town.]</p>
+<p>At a friend's house, in Berkeley Square, where I met a
+distinguished party, a scene took place, just such as Pope
+describes&mdash;</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Our courtier walks from dish to dish;</p>
+<p>Tastes, for his friend, of fowl and fish:</p>
+<p>"That jelly's rich, that malmsey's healing,</p>
+<p>Pray dip your whiskers and your tail in."</p>
+<p>Was ever such a happy swain?</p>
+<p>He stuffs, and swills, and stuffs again.</p>
+<p>"I'm quite ashamed&mdash;'Tis mighty rude</p>
+<p>To eat so much; but all's so good!</p>
+<p>I have a thousand thanks to give,</p>
+<p>My lord alone knows how to live."&mdash;</p>
+<p>No sooner said, but from the hall</p>
+<p>Rush chaplain, butler, dogs, and all:</p>
+<p>"A r&mdash;t, a r&mdash;t! clap to the door!"&mdash;</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>I, however, made good my exit, and was nothing the worse of a
+practical warning to be more cautious in future.</p>
+<p>It would be endless for me to describe all my after voyages and
+travels. Suffice it to say, I have been both east and west, north
+and south; and there is scarcely a part of the habitable globe
+which I have not visited. After all, I have come to this
+conclusion, that there is no country like Britain. Oh! how I could
+wish my human existence had been in such happy <span class=
+"pagenum"><a name="page399" id="page399"></a>[pg 399]</span> times
+and under such glorious sovereigns as a George the Third, and
+George the Fourth!!!</p>
+<p>For some years I have remained in this country, enjoying (like a
+patriarch of old) a quiet, regular life with my family, which now
+amounts to above 2,000. I, however, keep very much to my own room,
+as I hate bustle, and like to enjoy my own reflections.</p>
+<p>The age to which our species can exist is not ascertained, as
+never one of us was known to die in his bed, at least a natural
+death. A kind of instinct I have always had, has as yet saved me
+from arsenic, stewed corks, traps, stamps, &amp;c.; and my great
+strength, and a good deal of science, which is of more consequence,
+have, as yet, preserved me in many a deadly combat, both with my
+own species, and with the dog, the ferret, the weasel, the hawk,
+and that green-eyed monster&mdash;the cat. But I am now getting
+somewhat stiffer, and am not so sharp as I was. I am not&mdash;</p>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"&mdash;&mdash;qualis eram, quum primam aciem Pr&aelig;neste sub
+ipsa</p>
+<p>Stravi, scutorumque incendi victor acervos;</p>
+<p>Et regem h&acirc;c Herilum dextr&acirc; sub Tartara misi!!"</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<p>And in some evil hour my time must come.</p>
+<p>&mdash;I am well aware, indeed, of the fleeting existence even
+of this world itself, for I studied astronomy with the celebrated
+M. Olbers of Bremen, and assisted him in making many useful
+observations and discoveries, particularly regarding comets, in the
+course of which we came to this melancholy conclusion, that the
+comet which was afterwards visible in 1786 and 1795, will, in
+83,000 years, approach the earth as nearly as the moon; and that in
+4,000,000 years it will come to within a distance of 7,700
+geographical miles;&mdash;the consequence of which will be (if its
+attraction be equal to that of the earth) the elevation of the
+waters of the ocean 13,000 feet; that is to say, above the tops of
+all the European mountains, except Mount Blanc. The inhabitants of
+the Andes and of the Himalaya mountains alone will escape this
+second deluge; but they will not benefit by their good fortune more
+than 216,000,000 years, for it is probable, that at the expiration
+of that time, our globe standing right in the way of the comet,
+will receive a shock severe enough to ensure its utter
+destruction!!!</p>
+<p><i>Note.</i>&mdash;After reading over the above MS., I am
+inclined to come to this conclusion&mdash;that our historian, while
+in a human form, must have been a Scottish nobleman&mdash;that he
+probably was born about the year 1501&mdash;and that he lived to
+about the age of 89.&mdash;<i>Ed.</i></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>THE FANCY BALL.</h2>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"A visor for a visor! what care I</p>
+<p>What curious eye doth quote deformities!"</p>
+<p class="i10">SHAKSPEARE.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"You used to talk," said Miss Mac Call,</p>
+<p class="i2">"Of flowers, and flames, and Cupid;</p>
+<p>But now you never talk at all.</p>
+<p class="i2">You're getting vastly stupid.</p>
+<p>You'd better burn your Blackstone, Sir,</p>
+<p class="i2">You never will get through it;</p>
+<p>There's a Fancy Ball at Winchester&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">Do let us take you to it."</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>I made that night a solemn vow,</p>
+<p class="i2">To startle all beholders:</p>
+<p>I wore white muslin on my brow,</p>
+<p class="i2">Green velvet on my shoulders&mdash;</p>
+<p>My trousers were supremely wide,</p>
+<p class="i2">I learn'd to swear "by Allah"&mdash;</p>
+<p>I stuck a poniard by my side,</p>
+<p class="i2">And called myself "Abdallah."</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Oh! a Fancy Ball's a strange affair,</p>
+<p class="i2">Made up of silks and leathers,</p>
+<p>Light heads, light heels, false hearts, false hair,</p>
+<p class="i2">Pins, paint, and ostrich feathers:</p>
+<p>The dullest Duke in all the town,</p>
+<p class="i2">To-night may shine a droll one&mdash;</p>
+<p>And rakes, who have not half-a-crown,</p>
+<p class="i2">Look royal with a whole one.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Hail, blest Confusion! here are met</p>
+<p class="i2">All tongues, and times, and faces,</p>
+<p>The Lancers flirt with Juliet,</p>
+<p class="i2">The Bramin talks of races;</p>
+<p>And where's your genius, bright Corinne?</p>
+<p class="i2">And where your brogue, Sir Lucius?</p>
+<p>And Chinca Ti, you have not seen</p>
+<p class="i2">One chapter of Confucius.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Lo! dandies from Kamschatka flirt</p>
+<p class="i2">With beauties from the Wrekin&mdash;</p>
+<p>And belles from Berne look very pert</p>
+<p class="i2">On Mandarins from Pekin;</p>
+<p>The Cardinal is here from Rome,</p>
+<p class="i2">The Commandant from Seville&mdash;</p>
+<p>And Hamlet's father from the tomb,</p>
+<p class="i2">And Faustus from the Devil.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>What mean those laughing Nuns, I pray,</p>
+<p class="i2">What mean they, Nun or Fairy:</p>
+<p>I guess they told no beads to-day,</p>
+<p class="i2">And sang no Ave Mary.</p>
+<p>From Mass and Matins, Priest and Pix,</p>
+<p class="i2">Barred door, and window grated,</p>
+<p>I wish all pretty Catholics</p>
+<p class="i2">Were thus emancipated.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Four Seasons come to dance quadrilles,</p>
+<p class="i2">With four well-seasoned sailors&mdash;</p>
+<p>And Raleigh talks of rail-road bills,</p>
+<p class="i2">With Timon, prince of railers.</p>
+<p>I find Sir Charles of Aubyn Park</p>
+<p class="i2">Equipp'd for a walk to Mecca&mdash;</p>
+<p>And I run away from Joan of Arc,</p>
+<p class="i2">To romp with sad Rebecca.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Fair Cleopatra's very plain,</p>
+<p class="i2">Puck halts, and Ariel swaggers&mdash;</p>
+<p>And C&aelig;sar's murder'd o'er again,</p>
+<p class="i2">Though not by Roman daggers.</p>
+<p>Great Charlemagne is four feet high&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">Sad Stuff has Bacon spoken&mdash;</p>
+<p>Queen Mary's waist is all awry,</p>
+<p class="i2">And Psyche's nose is broken.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Our happiest bride, how very odd!</p>
+<p class="i2">Is the mourning Isabella,</p>
+<p>And the heaviest foot that ever trod</p>
+<p class="i2">Is the foot of Cinderella.</p>
+<p>Here sad Calista laughs outright,</p>
+<p class="i2">There Yorick looks most grave, Sir,</p>
+<p>And a Templar waves the cross to-night,</p>
+<p class="i2">Who never cross'd the wave, Sir.</p>
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="page400" id="page400"></a>[pg
+400]</span></div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>And what a Babel is the talk!</p>
+<p class="i2">"The Giraffe"&mdash;"plays the fiddle"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"Macadam's roads"&mdash;"I hate this chalk"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Sweet girl"&mdash;"a charming riddle"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"I'm nearly drunk with"&mdash;"Epsom salts"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Yes, separate beds"&mdash;"such cronies!"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"Good heaven! who taught that man to valtz?"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"A pair of Shetland ponies."</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"Lord D&mdash;&mdash;" "an enchanting shape"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Will move for"&mdash;"Maraschino"</p>
+<p>"Pray, Julia, how's your mother's ape?"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"He died at Navarino!"</p>
+<p>"The gout, by Jove, is"&mdash;"apple pie"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Don Miguel"&mdash;"Tom the tinker"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"His Lordship's pedigree's as high</p>
+<p class="i2">As &mdash;&mdash;" "Whipcord, dam by Clinker."</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>"Love's shafts are weak"&mdash;"my chestnut kicks"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Heart broken;"&mdash;"broke the traces"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"What say you now of politics?"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Change sides and to your places"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"A five-barred gate"&mdash;"a precious pearl"</p>
+<p class="i2">"Grave things may all be punn'd on!"&mdash;</p>
+<p>"The Whigs, thank God, are"&mdash;"out of curl!"&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">"Her age is"&mdash;"four by London!"</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Thus run the giddy hours away,</p>
+<p class="i2">Till morning's light is beaming,</p>
+<p>And we must go to dream by day</p>
+<p class="i2">All we to-night are dreaming;</p>
+<p>To smile and sigh, to love and change&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">Oh! in our heart's recesses,</p>
+<p>We dress in fancies quite as strange</p>
+<p class="i2">As these our fancy-dresses.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p><i>New Monthly Magazine</i>.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>The Gatherer.</h2>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>A snapper up of unconsidered trifles</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p class="i10">SHAKSPEARE.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<div class="poem">
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Tho' lang an lonely be the road</p>
+<p class="i2">Between me an my dearie;</p>
+<p>Yet I the gate hae aften troad,</p>
+<p class="i2">When I've been tired and wearie.</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>Be't stormin rain, hail, win or snaw&mdash;</p>
+<p class="i2">A lonely road and drearie&mdash;</p>
+<p>There's nought wad e'er keep me awa</p>
+<p class="i2">Frae gaun to see my dearie!!!</p>
+</div>
+<div class="stanza">
+<p>M.</p>
+</div>
+</div>
+<hr />
+<h3>FRENCH BALL CONVERSATION.</h3>
+<p>During the French revolution, parties danced as gaily as ever;
+the following is a ball conversation, which took place in the month
+of Frimare, year 7.:&mdash;Well, the Ottoman Porte has declared war
+against us! Oh yes, there is no doubt of it, (<i>En avant deux</i>)
+It is an enemy the more&mdash;(<i>chassez</i>) and the Russian
+fleet they say has passed the Dardanelles, (<i>en avant quatre</i>)
+yet the papers say that the emperor sincerely desires
+peace.&mdash;Yes, but Count Metternich wishes for war,
+(<i>balancez</i>) so we have also a new coalition against us.
+England, Portugal, Naples, Turkey, the Emperor, Russia, perhaps the
+empire of Prussia, (<i>Faites face et chassez tous les
+huit</i>)&mdash;well we have bayonettes, (<i>la poussette</i>)
+besides it is not so far from Dover to Calais,
+(<i>traversez</i>)&mdash;Do you belong to the
+conscription?&mdash;Yes, and I too; (<i>pirouettez</i>) what makes
+me uneasy is to know what will become of our partners when we are
+gone: (<i>La chaine des dames</i>)&mdash;what will be left to amuse
+them (<i>La queu du chat</i>.) It was thus that days of terror were
+preceded by evenings of amusement and pleasure.</p>
+<hr />
+<h3>INTUITIVE AFFECTION.</h3>
+<p>"There are three things," said a wit, "which I have always loved
+without ever understanding them, painting, music, and woman."</p>
+<hr />
+<h3>RETORT UNCOURTEOUS.</h3>
+<p>A lady, well known in the fashionable vicinity of
+Portland-place, always accosts a stranger, with "I think I have
+seen you somewhere," which often leads to a clue for her finding
+out the history of the party. One evening she played off the same
+game on a gentleman, who replied, "Most likely, madam, for I
+sometimes go there."</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>With the present Number is published the SECOND SUPPLEMENT of
+the Spirit of the Annuals&mdash;containing Poetry and Prose by
+Allan Cunningham, Professor Wilson, the late P.B. Shelley, Miss
+Landon, Mrs. Hemans, Mr. Pringle, Theodore Hook, and other
+distinguished Writers&mdash;with a beautiful Engraving.</p>
+<hr />
+<p>Purchasers of the MIRROR, who may wish to complete their sets
+are informed, that every volume is complete in itself, and may be
+purchased separately. The whole of the numbers are now in print,
+and can be procured by giving an order to any Bookseller or
+Newsvender.</p>
+<p>Complete sets Vol. I. to XI. in boards, price &pound;2.
+19<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i> half bound, &pound;3. 17<i>s.</i></p>
+<hr />
+<h4><i>LIMBIRD'S EDITIONS.</i></h4>
+<p>CHEAP and POPULAR WORKS published at the MIRROR OFFICE in the
+Strand, near Somerset House.</p>
+<p>The ARABIAN NIGHTS' ENTERTAINMENTS, Embellished with nearly 150
+Engravings. Price 6<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i> boards.</p>
+<p>The TALES of the GENII. Price 2<i>s.</i></p>
+<p>The MICROCOSM. By the Right Hon. G. CANNING, &amp;c. Price
+2<i>s.</i></p>
+<p>PLUTARCH'S LIVES, with Fifty Portraits, 2 vols. price
+13<i>s.</i> boards.</p>
+<p>COWPER'S POEMS, with 12 Engravings, price 3<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i>
+boards.</p>
+<p>COOK'S VOYAGES, 2 vols. price 8<i>s.</i> boards.</p>
+<p>The CABINET of CURIOSITIES: or WONDERS of the WORLD DISPLAYED
+Price 5<i>s.</i> boards.</p>
+<p>BEAUTIES of SCOTT. 2 vols. price 7<i>s.</i> boards.</p>
+<p>The ARCANA of SCIENCE for 1828. Price 4<i>s.</i> 6<i>d.</i></p>
+<p>*** Any of the above Works can be purchased in Parts.</p>
+<p>GOLDSMITH'S ESSAYS. Price 8<i>d.</i></p>
+<p>DR. FRANKLIN'S ESSAYS. Price 1<i>s.</i> 2<i>d.</i></p>
+<p>BACON'S ESSAYS. Price 8<i>d.</i></p>
+<p>SALMAGUNDI. Price 1<i>s.</i> 8<i>d.</i></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote1" name=
+"footnote1"></a><b>Footnote 1:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag1">(return)</a>
+<p>The Second of "the Spirit of the Annuals," containing a fine
+Engraving, after a celebrated picture by Turner, and a string of
+POETICAL GEMS from the Anniversary, Keepsake, and Friendship's
+Offering, with unique extracts from such of "the Annuals" as were
+not noticed in the previous Supplement.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote2" name=
+"footnote2"></a><b>Footnote 2:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag2">(return)</a>
+<p>Vide Percy's "Reliques," vol. ii. p. 178.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote3" name=
+"footnote3"></a><b>Footnote 3:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag3">(return)</a>
+<p>Strype's Stowe, vol. ii. p. 47, edit. 1755.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote4" name=
+"footnote4"></a><b>Footnote 4:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag4">(return)</a>
+<p>Miraculous dancing is not, however, confined to animals; for
+William of Malmesbury gravely relates an instance of 15 young women
+and 18 young men who (by the anathema of a priest) continued
+dancing a whole year, and wore the earth so much, that, by degrees,
+they sunk midway into the earth!</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote5" name=
+"footnote5"></a><b>Footnote 5:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag5">(return)</a>
+<p>Here is a card "extraordinary" of one of our humble English
+dancing-masters:&mdash;"As Dancing is the poetry of motion, those
+who wish to sail through the mazes of harmony, or to 'trip it on
+the light fantastic toe,' will find an able guide in John Wilde,
+who was formed by nature for a dancing-master.&mdash;N.B. Those who
+have been taught to dance with <i>a couple of left legs</i>, had
+better apply in time, as he effectually cures all bad habits of the
+kind."</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote6" name=
+"footnote6"></a><b>Footnote 6:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag6">(return)</a>
+<p>Apropos&mdash;our <i>Supplement</i> contains a fine Engraving of
+this very spot.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<blockquote class="footnote"><a id="footnote7" name=
+"footnote7"></a><b>Footnote 7:</b> <a href=
+"#footnotetag7">(return)</a>
+<p>The venerable count died about the year 1519. The glass coffins
+are still shown.</p>
+</blockquote>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><i>Printed and Published by J. LIMBIRD, 143, Strand, (near
+Somerset House,) London; sold by ERNEST FLEISCHER, 626, New Market,
+Leipsic; and by all Newsmen and Booksellers.</i></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MIRROR OF LITERATURE, AMUSEMENT, AND INSTRUCTION, VOL. 12, ISSUE 345, DECEMBER 6, 1828***</p>
+<p>******* This file should be named 10719-h.txt or 10719-h.zip *******</p>
+<p>This and all associated files of various formats will be found in:<br />
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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, The Mirror of Literature, Amusement, and
+Instruction, Vol. 12, Issue 345, December 6, 1828, by Various
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+Title: The Mirror of Literature, Amusement, and Instruction, Vol. 12,
+Issue 345, December 6, 1828
+
+Author: Various
+
+Release Date: January 14, 2004 [eBook #10719]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: US-ASCII
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MIRROR OF LITERATURE,
+AMUSEMENT, AND INSTRUCTION, VOL. 12, ISSUE 345, DECEMBER 6, 1828***
+
+
+E-text prepared by Jonathan Ingram, William Flis, and Project Gutenberg
+Distributed Proofreaders
+
+
+
+Note: Project Gutenberg also has an HTML version of this
+ file which includes the original illustration.
+ See 10719-h.htm or 10719-h.zip:
+ (http://www.ibiblio.org/gutenberg/1/0/7/1/10719/10719-h/10719-h.htm)
+ or
+ (http://www.ibiblio.org/gutenberg/1/0/7/1/10719/10719-h.zip)
+
+
+
+
+THE MIRROR OF LITERATURE, AMUSEMENT, AND INSTRUCTION.
+
+VOL. 12, No. 349.] SATURDAY, DECEMBER 6, 1828. [PRICE 2d.
+
+
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+
+THE ARCH OF CONSTANTINE, AT ROME.
+
+[Illustration: The Arch of Constantine, at Rome.]
+
+"Still harping" on the Fine Arts--_Architecture_ and _Painting_. Of
+the former, the above engraving is an illustration; and of the latter,
+our readers will find a beautiful subject (from one of _Turner's_
+pictures) in a _Supplement published with the present Number_.[1]
+
+ [1] The Second of "the Spirit of the Annuals," containing a fine
+ Engraving, after a celebrated picture by Turner, and a string of
+ POETICAL GEMS from the Anniversary, Keepsake, and Friendship's
+ Offering, with unique extracts from such of "the Annuals" as were
+ not noticed in the previous Supplement.
+
+The Arches of Rome were splendid monuments of triumph, erected in
+honour of her illustrious generals. They were at first very simple,
+being built of brick or hewn stone, and of a semicircular figure; but
+afterwards more magnificent, built of the finest marble, and of a
+square figure, with a large, arched gate in the middle, and two small
+ones on each side, adorned with columns and statues. In the vault of
+the middle gate, hung winged figures of victory, bearing crowns in
+their hands, which, when let down, they placed on the victor's head,
+when he passed in triumph.
+
+The _Arch of Constantine_, the most noble of all of these structures,
+subsists almost entire. It was erected by the senate and Roman people,
+in honour of Constantine, after his victory over Maxentius, and
+crosses the Appian Way, at the junction of the Coelian and Palatine
+Hills. Here it stands as the last monument of Roman triumph, or like
+the December sun of "the world's sole monument."
+
+This building consists of three arches, of which the centre is the
+largest; and has two fronts, each adorned with four columns of giallo
+antico marble, of the Corinthian order, and fluted, supporting a
+cornice, on which stand eight Dacian captives of Pavonazzetta, or
+violet-coloured marble.
+
+The inscription on both sides of the architrave imports, that it was
+dedicated "to the Emperor Caesar Flavius Constantine Augustus, the
+greatest, pious, and the happy; because by a divine impulse, the
+greatness of his courage, and the aid of his army, he avenged the
+republic by his just arms, and, at the same time, rescued it from the
+tyrant and his whole faction." On one side of the arch are the words,
+"Liberatori urbis," to the deliverer of the city; and on the other,
+"Fundatori quietis," to the founder of public tranquillity.
+
+Although erected to the honour of Constantine, this arch commemorates
+the victories of Trajan, some of the basso-relievos, &c. having
+been pilfered from one of the arches of Trajan. This accounts for
+the Dacian captives, whose heads Lorenzo de Medicis broke off and
+conveyed to Florence, but the theft might not have been so notorious
+to posterity, had not the artists of Constantine's time added some
+figures of inferior merit. Forsyth says, "Constantine's reign was
+notorious for architectural robbery;" and the styles of the two
+emperors, in the present arch, mar the harmony by their unsightly
+contrasts.
+
+Although the decree for erecting this arch was, without doubt, passed
+immediately after the defeat of Maxentius, it appears from the
+monument itself, that the building was not finished and dedicated till
+the tenth year of Constantine's reign, or the year of Christ 315 or
+316.
+
+The newly-erected arch opposite the entrance to Hyde Park is from the
+Roman arch, though, we believe, not from any particular model. In the
+View of the New Palace, St. James's Park, (in our No. 278,) the arch,
+to be called the Waterloo Monument, and erected in the middle of the
+area of the palace, will be nearly a copy of that of Constantine
+at Rome. In the court-yard of the Tuilleries at Paris, there is a
+similar arch, copied from that of Septimius Severus. This was formerly
+surmounted by the celebrated group of the horses of St. Mark, pilfered
+from Venice, but restored at the peace of 1815.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE BEGGAR'S DAUGHTER OF BETHNAL GREEN.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+The popular ballad of "The Beggar's Daughter of Bednall-Greene" was
+written in the reign of Queen Elizabeth. It is founded, though without
+the least appearance of truth, or even probability, on a legend of
+the time of Henry III. Henry de Montfort, son of the ambitious Earl
+of Leicester, who was slain with his father at the memorable battle
+of Evesham, is the hero of the tale. He is supposed (according to
+the legend) to have been discovered among the bodies of the slain
+by a young lady, in an almost lifeless state, and deprived of sight
+by a wound, which he had received during the engagement. Under
+the fostering hand of this "faire damosel" he soon recovered, and
+afterwards marrying her, she became the mother of "the comelye and
+prettye Bessee." Fearing lest his rank and person should be discovered
+by his enemies, he disguised himself in the habit of a beggar, and
+took up his abode at Bethnal-Green. The beauty of his daughter
+attracted many suitors, and she was at length married to a noble
+knight, who, regardless of her supposed meanness and poverty, had the
+courage to make her his wife, her other lovers having deserted her on
+account of her low origin. Before entering, however, upon the ballad,
+it may not, perhaps, be thought irrelevant to give a brief sketch of
+the family of the De Montforts.
+
+Simon de Montfort, created Earl of Leicester by Henry III., was the
+younger son of Simon de Montfort, the renowned but cruel commander
+of the croisade against the Albigenses. This nobleman was greatly
+honoured by Henry III., to whose sister, the Countess Dowager of
+Pembroke, he paid his addresses, and was married, with the consent
+of her brother. For the favour thus shown him by his sovereign, he,
+however, proved ungrateful: his inordinate ambition, cloaked by a
+pretended zeal for reform, was the cause of those rebellions which, in
+the reign of Henry III., kept the kingdom in such a continued turmoil.
+The different oppressions and successes of the confederate barons,
+who at length got possession of the king's person, and the civil
+wars which ensued, are so well known as to render any remark on the
+subject superfluous; suffice it to say, that the disputes between
+the malcontents and the royal party were at length terminated by the
+battle of Evesham, which decided in favour of the latter. In this
+field fell the Earl of Leicester and his eldest son, Henry de
+Montfort. His death was followed by the total ruin of his family;
+his titles and estates were all confiscated; the countess, his wife,
+who had been extremely active in her designs against the royalists,
+was banished, together with her sons, Simon and Guy, who afterwards
+assassinated their cousin, Henry d'Allmane, when he was endeavouring
+to effect a reconciliation between them and their uncle, Henry IV.
+The head of the earl was sent as a signal of the victory by Roger de
+Mortimer to the countess; but his body, together with that of his
+son Henry, was interred in the Abbey of Evesham; thus leaving the
+improbability of the legend without a shadow of doubt.
+
+As our limits will not allow us to quote the whole of the ballad,[1]
+we must content ourselves with giving the song of the beggar, which,
+as well as being the most interesting, contains the whole of the
+legend concerning de Montfort:--
+
+ A poore beggar's daughter did dwell on a greene,
+ Who for her fairnesse might well be a queene:
+ A blithe bonny lasse, and a daintye was shee,
+ And many one called her pretty Bessee.
+
+ Her father hee had noe goods nor noe land,
+ But begg'd for a penny all day with his hand;
+ And yett to her marriage he gave thousands three,
+ And still he hath somewhat for pretty Bessee.
+
+ And if any one here her birth doe disdaine,
+ Her father is ready, with might and with maine,
+ To prove shee is come of noble degree--
+ Therefore, ever flout att prettye Bessee.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+ Then give me leave, nobles and gentles, each one,
+ One song more to sing, and then I have done;
+ And if that itt may not winn good report,
+ Then doe not give me a GROAT for my sport.
+
+ Sir Simon de Montfort my subject shall bee.
+ Once chiefe of all the great barons was hee--
+ Yet fortune so cruelle this lorde did abase,
+ Now loste and forgotten are hee and his race.
+
+ When the barons in armes did King Henrye oppose,
+ Sir Simon de Montfort their leader they chose--
+ A leader of courage undaunted was hee,
+ And oft-times he made their enemyes flee.
+
+ At length in the battle on Eveshame plaine
+ The barons were routed, and Montfort was slaine;
+ Moste fatall that battel did prove unto thee,
+ Thoughe thou wast not borne then, my prettye Bessee!
+
+ Along with the nobles that fell at that tyde,
+ His eldest son Henrye, who fought by his side,
+ Was fellde by a blowe he receiv'de in the fighte!
+ A blowe that depriv'de him for ever of sight.
+
+ Among the dead bodyes all lifelesse he laye,
+ Till evening drewe on of the following daye,
+ When by a yong ladye discover'd was hee--
+ And this was thy mother, my prettye Bessee!
+
+ A baron's faire daughter stept forth in the nighte,
+ To search for her father, who fell in the fight,
+ And seeing yong Montfort, where gasping he laye,
+ Was moved with pitye, and broughte him awaye.
+
+ In secrette she nurst him, and swaged his paine,
+ While he throughe the realme was beleev'd to be slaine:
+ At lengthe his faire bride she consented to bee,
+ And made him glad father of prettye Bessee.
+
+ And nowe, lest oure foes our lives sholde betraye
+ We clothed ourselves in beggars' arraye;
+ Her jewells shee solde, and hither came wee--
+ All our comfort and care was our prettye Bessee.
+
+ And here have wee lived in fortunes despite,
+ Thoughe poore, yet contented with humble delighte;
+ Full forty winters thus have I beene
+ A silly blind beggar of Bednall-greene.
+
+ And here, noble lordes, is ended the song
+ Of one that once to your owne ranke did belong:
+ And thus have you learned a secrette from mee,
+ That ne'er had beene knowne but for prettye Bessee.
+
+ [1] Vide Percy's "Reliques," vol. ii. p. 178.
+
+At Bethnal-Green is an old mansion, which, in the survey of 1703, was
+called _Bethnal-Green-House_, and which the inhabitants, with their
+usual love of traditionary lore, assign as the "Palace of the Blind
+Beggar." This house was erected in the reign of Queen Elizabeth, by
+John Kirby, citizen of London, and was, says Stow,[1] "lofty like a
+castle." It was afterwards the residence of Sir Hugh Platt, Knight,
+the author of many ingenious works; from him it came into the
+possession of Sir William Ryder, Knight, who died there in 1669; of
+late years it has been used as a private madhouse. The tradition of
+the beggar is still preserved on the sign-posts of several of the
+public-houses in the neighbourhood.
+
+ [1] Strype's Stowe, vol. ii. p. 47, edit. 1755.
+
+S.I.B.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+HISTORY AND ANTIQUITY OF WILLS.
+
+(_For the Mirror._)
+
+According to Blackstone, wills are of high antiquity. We find them
+among the ancient Hebrews; not to mention what Eusebius and others
+have related of Noah's testament, made in writing, and witnessed under
+his seal, by which he disposed of the whole world. A more authentic
+instance of the early use of testaments occurs in the sacred writings,
+(Genesis, chap. xlviii.) in which Jacob bequeaths to his son Joseph, a
+portion of his inheritance, double to that of his brethren.
+
+The Grecian practice concerning wills (says Potter) was not the same
+in all places; some states permitted men to dispose of their estates,
+others wholly deprived them of that privilege. We are told by
+Plutarch, that Solon is much commended for his law concerning wills;
+for before his time no man was allowed to make any, but all the wealth
+of deceased persons belonged to their families; but he permitted them
+to bestow it on whom they pleased, esteeming friendship a stronger tie
+than kindred, and affection than necessity, and thus put every man's
+estate in the disposal of the possessor; yet he allowed not all sorts
+of wills, but required the following conditions in all persons that
+made them:--
+
+1st. That they must be citizens of Athens, not slaves, or foreigners,
+for then their estates were confiscated for the public use.
+
+2nd. That they must be men who have arrived to twenty years of age,
+for women and men under that age were not permitted to dispose by will
+of more than one _medimn_ of barley.
+
+3rd. That they must not be adopted; for when adopted persons died
+without issue, the estates they received by adoption returned to the
+relations of the men who adopted them.
+
+4th. That they should have no male children of their own, for then
+their estate belonged to these. If they had only daughters, the
+persons to whom the inheritance was bequeathed were obliged to marry
+them. Yet men were allowed to appoint heirs to succeed their children,
+in case these happened to die under twenty years of age.
+
+5th. That they should be in their right minds, because testaments
+extorted through the phrenzy of a disease, or dotage of old age, were
+not in reality the wills of the persons that made them.
+
+6th. That they should not be under imprisonment, or other constraint,
+their consent being then only forced, nor in justice to be reputed
+voluntary.
+
+7th. That they should not be induced to it by the charms and
+insinuations of a wife; for (says Plutarch) the wise lawgiver with
+good reason thought that no difference was to be put between deceit
+and necessity, flattery and compulsion, since both are equally
+powerful to persuade a man from reason.
+
+Wills were usually signed before several witnesses, who put seals to
+them for confirmation, then placed them in the hands of trustees, who
+were obliged to see them performed. At Athens, some of the magistrates
+were very often present at the making of wills. Sometimes the
+_archons_ were also present. Sometimes the testator declared his will
+before sufficient witnesses, without committing it to writing. Thus
+Callias, fearing to be cut off by a wicked conspiracy, is said to have
+made an open declaration of his will before the popular assembly at
+Athens. There were several copies of wills in Diogenes Laertius, as
+those of Aristotle, Lycon, and Theophrastus; whence it appears they
+had a common form, beginning with a wish for life and health.
+
+The most ancient testaments among the Romans were made _viva voce_,
+the testator declaring his will in the presence of seven witnesses;
+these they called _nuncupative_ testaments; but the danger of trusting
+the will of the dead to the memory of the living soon abolished these;
+and all testaments were ordered to be in writing.
+
+The Romans were wont to set aside testaments, as being _inofficiosa_,
+deficient in natural duty, if they disinherited or totally passed by
+(without assigning a true and sufficient reason) any of the children
+of the testator. But if the child had any legacy, though ever so
+small, it was a proof that the testator had not lost his memory nor
+his reason, which otherwise the law presumed. Hence probably (says
+Blackstone) has arisen that groundless, vulgar error of the necessity
+of leaving the heir a shilling, or some other express legacy, in order
+to effectually disinherit him; whereas the law of England, though
+the heir, or next of kin, be totally omitted, admits no _querela
+inofficiosa_, to set aside such testament.
+
+Alfred the Great made a will, wherein he declared, in express terms,
+that it was just the English should be as free as their own thoughts.
+
+P.T.W.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+
+THE COSMOPOLITE.
+
+DANCING.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+
+Dancing is defined to be "to move in measure; to move with steps
+correspondent to the sound of instruments." But there are other
+species of dancing--as
+
+ -----------------for three long months
+ To _dance attendance_ for a word of audience:
+
+and to dance with pain, or when, as Lord Bacon says, "in pestilences,
+the malignity of the infecting vapour danceth the principal spirits."
+The _Chorea S. Viti_, or _St. Vitus's Dance_ is another variation,
+said to have once prevailed extensively, and to have been cured by a
+prayer to this saint! whose martyrdom is commemorated on June 15. It
+may not be generally known that a person afflicted with this species
+of dancing can _run_, although he cannot walk or stand still. Another
+and a more agreeable species is to _lead the dance_, an unjust
+usurpation which is practised in a thousand other places beside the
+ball-room.
+
+According to the mythologists, (authorities always quotable, and
+nobody knows why,) the Curetes or Corybantes, a people of Crete, who
+were _produced from rain_, first invented the dance to amuse the
+infant Jupiter--with what success he danced we know not, for when a
+year old he waged war against the Titans, and then his dancing days
+must have terminated.
+
+A history of dancing is, however, not to our purpose; but a few of its
+eccentricities. It occurs in the customs of all people, either as a
+recreation or as a religious ceremony--held in contempt by some, and
+in esteem by others. David danced before the ark; the daughters of
+Shiloh danced in a solemn yearly festival; and the Israelites, (good
+judges) danced round the golden calf.
+
+The ancients had a peculiar _penchant_ for dancing, whether in person
+or by animals; and the feats of the latter distance all the wretched
+efforts of the bears, dogs, and horses of our days. The attempts
+of Galba to amuse the Roman people throw into the shade all the
+peace-rejoicings and illuminations of St. James's and the Green Parks.
+Suetonius, Seneca, and Pliny tell us of _elephants_ in their time that
+were taught to walk the rope, backwards and forwards, up and down,
+with the agility of an Italian rope-dancer. Such was the confidence
+reposed in the docility and dexterity of the animal, that a person
+sat upon an elephant's back, while he walked across the theatre
+upon a rope, extended from the one side to the other. Lipsius,
+who has collected these testimonies, thinks them too strong to be
+doubted--perhaps even stronger than the rope. Scaliger corroborates
+all of them; Busbequius _saw_ an elephant dance a _pas seul_ at
+Constantinople; and Suetonius tells us of twelve elephants, six male
+and six female, who were clothed like men and women, and performed a
+country dance, in the reign of Tiberius. In later times, horses have
+been taught to dance. In the carousals of Louis XIII. there were
+dances of horses; and in the 13th century, some rode a horse upon a
+rope. All this eclipses the puny modern feats of Astley and Ducrow.[1]
+
+ [1] Miraculous dancing is not, however, confined to animals; for
+ William of Malmesbury gravely relates an instance of 15 young
+ women and 18 young men who (by the anathema of a priest) continued
+ dancing a whole year, and wore the earth so much, that, by
+ degrees, they sunk midway into the earth!
+
+The Greeks and Romans were divided upon the propriety of dancing.
+Socrates who held death in contempt, when a reverend old gentleman,
+learned to dance of Aspasia, the beautiful nurse of Grecian eloquence.
+The Romans forgot their loss of the republic and of liberty--
+
+ ------------------the air we breathe
+ If we have it not we die.
+
+in seeing Pylades and Bathyllus dance before them in their
+theatres--an indifference of which we were reminded on hearing that
+the Parisians sat in the _Cafes_ on the Boulevard du Italiens--sipping
+coffee and sucking down ice, during the capitulation of the city, and
+while the French, killed and wounded, were conveyed along the road
+before them.
+
+Cato, _Censorius_, danced at the age of fifty-six. Cicero, however,
+reproached a consul with having danced. Tiberius, that monster of
+indulgences, banished dancers from Rome; and Domitian, the illustrious
+fly-catcher, expelled several of his _members of parliament_ for
+having danced. We are much more civilized, for such an edict as that
+of Domitian would clear our senate-houses as effectually as when
+Cromwell turned out the Long Parliament.
+
+Among the Italians and the French even there have been found enemies
+to dancing. Alfieri, the poet, had a great aversion to dancing; and
+one Daneau wrote a Traite des Danses, in which he maintains that
+"the devil never invented a more effectual way than dancing, to fill
+the world with ----." The bishop of Noyon once presided at some
+deliberations respecting a minuet; and in 1770, a reverend prelate
+presented a document on dancing to the king of France. The Quakers
+consider dancing below the dignity of the Christian character; and an
+enthusiast, of another creed, thinks all lovers of the stage belong to
+the schools of Voltaire and Hume, and that dancing is a link in the
+chain of seduction. Stupid, leaden-heeled people, who constantly mope
+in melancholy, and neither enjoy nor impart pleasure, will naturally
+be enemies to dancing; and such we are induced to think the majority
+of these opponents.
+
+The French are inveterate dancers. They have their _bals pares_ and
+their _salons de danse_ in every street; and as long as the weather
+will permit, they dance on platforms out of doors, and a heavy shower
+of rain will scarcely cool their ardour in the recreation. Some of
+their stage _figurantes_ resemble aerial beings rather than bone and
+blood, for flesh may almost be left out of the composition. But the
+Italians are a nation of dancers as well as the children of song, and
+they seem to have followed the noble example of old Cato, in this
+respect, with better effect than they have studied his virtue. We are
+also told upon good authority, that the American dancers equal any of
+the European _figurantes_.
+
+The English people have always been lovers of dancing; and it forms
+an accompaniment of almost all their old sports and pastimes. Witness
+the maypoles, wassails, and wakes of rural life, and the grotesque
+morris-dance, originating in a kind of Pyrrhic or military dance, and
+described by Sir William Temple as composed of "ten men, who danced a
+maid marian and a tabor and pipe." In the time of Henry VII. dancers
+were remarkably well paid; for in some of his accounts in the
+Exchequer, we find
+
+ L. s. d.
+Paid to a spye, in reward----------------- 2 0 0
+To Pechie, the fool, in rewarde----------- 0 6 8
+To Richard Beden, for writing of bokes---- 0 10 0
+_To the young dameysell that daunceth_---- 30 0 0
+
+In Shakspeare's time, to _dance_ was an elegant accomplishment. Thus
+in the "Merry Wives of Windsor," "What say you to young Mr. Fenton? He
+capers, he _dances_, he has eyes of youth, he writes verses." Locke
+thus alludes to the graceful motions which dancing lends to the human
+frame: "the legs of the dancing-master, and the fingers of a musician,
+fall, as it were, naturally, without thought or pains, into regular
+and admirable motions."
+
+It must be somewhat surprising to those who over-rate the
+matter-of-fact character of the English people, that so great a
+majority of them are attached to _dancing_. Among rank and wealth
+this amusement admits of a finer display of beauty and artificial
+decoration than almost any other recreation; for nothing can be more
+splendid than a brilliantly illuminated and well-filled ball-room.
+Dancing among the middle classes of society is equally mirthful though
+not of so ostentatious a character, and it is a question whether the
+latter, being free from the alloy of fashionable follies, are not more
+exhilarated by sweet sounds than their wealthy superiors. But the
+mushroom aristocracy and pride of purse often operate as checks to the
+enjoyment of both these classes; and splendid dancing accommodations
+sometimes put an end to the amusement. At Dorking, in Surrey, attached
+to one of the inns is a ball-room, which cost the builder L12,000, and
+here is one, or at most three balls during the year, while at scores
+of places within our recollection, of less consequence, there are
+monthly and even weekly balls; and we are inclined to think these
+periodical recreations of great importance to the happiness of country
+towns. But there is a species of intoxication sometimes arising
+from them--that of dancing all night, to suffer from exhaustion and
+rheumatism on the following day--an evil easy of remedy, by such
+amusements being more frequent and less protracted. The influence
+on the character of the people would probably be that of rendering
+it more even, from the admixture or reciprocation of pleasure and
+business being more proportional. This plan would get rid of much of
+the ostentation and expense of a country ball, and would ultimately
+prove the best antidote to the sins of scandal.
+
+As we have spoken of public dancing in the time of Henry VII., we will
+show that the enormous sums paid to _artists_ have nourished their
+conceit to an alarming height. Pitrot, the Vestris of his day, was a
+consummate specimen of this effrontery. At Vienna, he chose to appear
+only in the last act of the ballet. The emperor desired him to come
+forth at the end of the first; Pitrot refused; the court left the
+opera, and then Pitrot told the dancers they would have a hop by
+themselves, which they did. However, this was forgiven; and, at his
+departure, he was presented with the emperor's picture, set with
+brilliants. Pitrot received it with _sang froid_, pressed his thumb
+upon the crystal, crushed the picture to pieces, adding, "Thus I treat
+men not worthy of my friendship." This fellow behaved equally ill
+in France, Prussia, and Russia; but, at length, scouted by all his
+patrons, and, after giving his thousands to opera girls, he wandered
+about Calais in rags and poverty. Farinelli, after accumulating a
+fortune in England, built a superb mansion in Italy, which he called
+the _English Folly_.[1]
+
+ [1] Here is a card "extraordinary" of one of our humble English
+ dancing-masters:--"As Dancing is the poetry of motion, those who
+ wish to sail through the mazes of harmony, or to 'trip it on the
+ light fantastic toe,' will find an able guide in John Wilde, who
+ was formed by nature for a dancing-master.--N.B. Those who have
+ been taught to dance with _a couple of left legs_, had better
+ apply in time, as he effectually cures all bad habits of the
+ kind."
+
+The oddity of some ideas of dancing is really ludicrous. The
+Cambro-Britains, in a very late period, used to be played out of
+church by a fiddle, and to form a dance in the church-yard at the
+end of the service. But the ideas which the Chinese have of dancing
+exceeds all others. When Commodore Anson was at Canton, the officers
+of the _Centurion_ had a ball upon some court holiday: while they were
+dancing, a Chinese, who very quietly surveyed the operation, said,
+softly, to one of the party, "Why don't you let your servants do this
+for you?"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+FINE ARTS.
+
+SCHOOL OF PAINTING AT THE BRITISH INSTITUTION.
+
+_(To the Editor of the Mirror.)_
+
+
+I beg to present you with a brief notice of the School of Painting at
+the British Institution, Pall Mall; you may rely upon its correctness,
+as I have been extremely cautious in making my notes, and in
+ascertaining every particular relative to the subject.
+
+The students at this excellent institution have, for several weeks,
+been arduously engaged in copying the fine pictures which were
+entrusted to the directors by his majesty, and the nobility, for that
+purpose. In general, the students have been very successful, and
+deserve much praise; I must, however, in my prescribed limits, only
+mention a few.
+
+Vandyke's _Duchess de St. Croix_ has been cleverly copied by Mr. Boden
+and Mr. Faulkner; the latter gentleman has well imitated the color and
+the beautiful finish of the original. Messrs. Frisk, Child, Howell
+and M'Call have likewise made clever copies of this _chef d'oeuvre_
+of art. Many bold efforts have been made to copy Hobbima's large
+_Landscape_; Mr. Laporte's is the most complete, though not quite
+spirited enough in the handling. _The Spanish Gentleman_, by
+Velasquez, has engaged the pencils of numerous artists, though they
+have not all been so successful as could have been wished; Messrs.
+Inskipp, Frisk, Morton and Child have produced the best _fac similes_.
+The _Lime Kiln_, by the younger Teniers, has been carefully studied
+by Mr. Gill, &c.; and Messrs. M'Call and Morton, have executed the
+finest studies from _Innocent X._, by Velasquez. _The Embarkation_,
+by Claude, is extremely well imitated in Mr. Cartwright's copy; and
+the _Virgin and Child_, which is one of Julio Romano's best works,
+has met with due attention from Mr. Farrier, and others. Mr. Novice
+has executed the only copy from DeHooge's fine picture--_A Dutch
+Family preparing for a Walk_; and Messrs. Foster and Earl display
+considerable talent in their copies from the _Landscape and Cattle_,
+by Cuyp. Other admirable works by Guido, Rubens, Bassan, Ruysdael,
+Vanderneer, and Canaletta, have met with a host of imitators, from
+whose talents we may anticipate, at no distant period, pictorial
+excellency of the first order. I should discover a want of gallantry,
+and, indeed, be most unjust, were I not to say that the ladies, in
+nearly all their undertakings, have exerted their utmost to excel;
+those especially, who have executed copies in water colours deserve
+the highest recommendation.
+
+G.W.N.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE ANECDOTE GALLERY.
+
+THAXTED HIGHWAYMEN.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+
+The following incident led to the breaking up and dispersion of a gang
+of desperate highwaymen, denominated the Thaxted gang, who about sixty
+years ago used to infest the roads in the neighbourhood of Dunmow,
+Thaxted, and the adjacent towns and villages:--
+
+An opulent farmer of Thaxted, being one day at Dunmow market, received
+a considerable sum of money, the produce of grain and other marketable
+articles, which he had that day disposed of; and going to the inn
+where he had left his horse, he ordered it to be saddled directly
+for the purpose of returning home. In those times every tradesman,
+salesman and a greater part of the publicans and innkeepers knew what
+money each other received on a market day. The innkeeper at whose
+house the farmer was in the habit of putting up at, said to him, "Why
+you are not going home to-night, are you, with all that money about
+you? You will stand a chance of getting a knock on the head."--"Let
+them knock away," answered the farmer. "I have never yet been robbed,
+nor do I think it likely I shall be to-night; so, Robert, get my horse
+ready," calling to the hostler. "Well, but have you any weapons of
+defence?" inquired the publican.--"No, nor none I want," responded the
+farmer. The innkeeper pressed him to take a pair of holster pistols;
+saying, "he might find them handy;" and after a great deal of
+persuasion, he agreed to take _one_, the publican first loading and
+charging it with ball. The farmer put the pistol in his great coat
+pocket, and was on the point of departure when he recollected that he
+had to get a pound of tea at a grocer's shop in the town, a few doors
+from the inn. He instantly ran to the shop for the tea, and while the
+grocer was serving him he made the same remark as the innkeeper had
+done respecting his going home with so considerable a sum as he knew
+the farmer had about him. The farmer made answer, "I am going home
+to-night, but our friend the publican, has lent me a pistol; and if
+any one interrupts me, I intend to blow his brains out."--"Do you
+know," said the grocer, "I do not like that fellow. Will you let me
+look at the pistol if you have it with you."--"O yes, look at it if
+you like. I never fired a pistol in my life; however, should I be
+stopped, I think I could manage it." The grocer took the pistol; drew
+the charge; and found, to the great surprise of the farmer, it was
+only loaded with horse-dung, and a large bullet at the top. "I thought
+he was a rascal, and this confirms it." said the grocer. "Here is
+evidently a plot; now leave your money with me; we will load this
+pistol properly, and you can, if you like, proceed on your journey:
+it may be the means of detecting some one."
+
+The farmer left his money in the hands of the grocer; went back to the
+inn; mounted his horse, and rode off on his journey. About a mile
+from Dunmow, he was stopped by a fellow, well mounted, who instantly
+demanded his money. "I have not got any," replied the farmer, "but I
+have a pistol, with which, if you do not instantly allow me to pass on
+my way home, I will blow your brains out." "You have got money--and as
+to the pistol, you may blow away--blow away, my fine fellow," said the
+chuckling highwayman. The farmer instantly fired, and his assailant
+fell off his horse to the ground with a groan. The farmer galloped
+back to the inn, and inquired of the hostler where his master was.
+"He has been gone out, on horseback, about a quarter of an hour,"
+the hostler replied. "Well, I will tell you what," said the farmer,
+"you may find your master, with his brains blown out, in the road,"
+describing the place where he had had the encounter with the
+innkeeper.
+
+From this time a number of persons resident in and about Thaxted and
+Dunmow, left their places of abode, which circumstance created some
+surprise among the remaining inhabitants; but it was afterwards
+ascertained they formed the desperate gang that had so long and
+successfully robbed, and sometimes murdered, their unsuspecting
+neighbours and the different travellers who had occasion to pass the
+roads on which these marauders were stationed.
+
+J.W.B.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+MANNERS & CUSTOMS OF ALL NATIONS.
+
+_(For the Mirror.)_
+
+
+WISE MEN OF GOTHAM.
+
+The village of Gotham, about seven miles from Nottingham, has been
+rendered noted by the common proverb of "The Wise Men of Gotham."
+It is observable that a custom has prevailed among many nations of
+stigmatizing the inhabitants of some particular spot as remarkable for
+stupidity. This opprobrious district among the Asiatics was Phrygia.
+Among the Thracians, Abdera; among the Greeks, Boeotia; in England
+it is Gotham. Of the Gothamites ironically called _The Wise Men of
+Gotham_, many ridiculous stories are traditionally told, particularly,
+that often having heard the cuckoo but never seen her, they hedged in
+a bush from whence her note seemed to proceed, so that being confined
+within so small a compass, they might at length satisfy their
+curiosity; and at a place called Court Hill, in this parish, is a bush
+called Cuckoo Bush.
+
+HALBERT H.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+MALLARD NIGHT.
+
+At All Souls' College, Oxford, the _Mallard Night_ is celebrated
+annually on the 14th of January, in remembrance of a very singular
+circumstance, viz. the discovery of a live and excessively large
+mallard, or drake, supposed to have long ranged in a drain or sewer
+of considerable depth. The only probable conjecture respecting its
+extraordinary situation was, that it had fallen when young through the
+bars or grating at the entrance of the drain, (which was of sufficient
+width to receive it if very young,) but was found at a great distance
+from it, on digging for the foundation of the college, (A.D. 1437.) A
+very humorous account of this event was published some years ago by
+Dr. Buckler, subwarden, from a manuscript of Thomas Walsingham, the
+historian, and monk of St. Alban's. It is the cause of much mirth, for
+on the day, and in remembrance of the mallard, many an old and merry
+song is sung.
+
+E.T.S.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+WELSH MARRIAGES.
+
+It appears to me a matter of no small surprise that so economical
+a people as the English should not have adopted such a plan as the
+following by the lower classes of the Welsh. When a young couple
+intend offering themselves at the Temple of Hymen, if they are very
+poor, they generally send a man, called the bidder, round to their
+acquaintance and friends, who invites them, sometimes in rhyme, to
+the wedding; but if they can afford it, they issue circulars. The
+following is a copy of one:--
+
+"_June 27, 1827._
+
+"As we intend to enter the matrimonial state on Thursday, the 19th day
+of July next, we are encouraged by our friends to make a bidding on
+the occasion, the same day, at the Butchers' Arms, Carmarthen, when
+and where the favour of your good and agreeable company is humbly
+solicited; and whatever donation you may be pleased to confer on us
+then, will be thankfully received, warmly acknowledged, and cheerfully
+repaid whenever called for on a similar occasion.
+
+"By your most obedient servants,
+
+"JOHN JONES.
+
+"MARY EVANS."
+
+The persons so invited (if they accept the invitation) generally form
+part of the procession to church, and are preceded by a harper or
+fiddler. After the nuptial knot is tied, they veer their course to
+the public-house mentioned in the bills, where they partake, not of a
+sumptuous banquet, but of the simple, though not the worst, fare of
+bread and cheese and kisses, at the expense of the new married folks.
+After this, a large plate is placed on the table in the room, and they
+proceed to receive the money which each person may be disposed to
+give, whilst one keeps account of the sum and names. They frequently
+receive 50_l._, and sometimes, though seldom, 100_l._; and they have
+the privilege (by paying the duty) of selling the ale to the persons
+assembled. It is to be observed, that the money so deposited cannot be
+reclaimed by the persons who gave it until a similar occasion presents
+itself in their family. By this means the new married couple are
+enabled to procure furniture, and other things requisite for them.
+
+W.H.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+CURIOUS FOUNDATION.
+
+At Spinney, in Cambridgeshire, was an abbey founded in the reign of
+Henry III. near which was a church, built by Lady Mary Bassingburne,
+and given to the Abbey of Spinney, on condition that the monks should
+support seven aged men with the following allowance, viz. one farthing
+loaf, one herring, and one pennyworth of ale per day, and two hundred
+dry turves, one pair of shoes, one woollen garment, and three ells of
+linen every year. Henry Cromwell, second son of Oliver Cromwell, is
+buried here.
+
+HALBERT H.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE SELECTOR,
+
+AND
+
+LITERARY NOTICES OF
+
+_NEW WORKS_
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+ADVENTURES OF ALLAN-A-SOP.
+
+_By Sir Walter Scott, Bart._
+
+The chief of the clan, MacLean of Duart, in the Isle of Mull, had an
+intrigue with a beautiful young woman of his own clan, who bore a son
+to him. In consequence of the child's being, by some accident, born in
+a barn, he received the name of Allan-a-Sop, or Allan of the Straw, by
+which he was distinguished from others of his clan. As his father and
+mother were not married, Allan was of course a bastard or natural son,
+and had no inheritance to look for, save that which he might win for
+himself.
+
+But the beauty of the boy's mother having captivated a man of rank in
+the clan, called MacLean of Torloisk, he married her, and took her
+to reside with him at his castle of Torloisk, situated on the shores
+of the Sound, or small strait of the sea, which divides the smaller
+island of Ulva from that of Mull. Allan-a-Sop paid his mother frequent
+visits at her new residence, and she was naturally glad to see the
+poor boy, both from affection, and on account of his personal strength
+and beauty, which distinguished him above other youths of his age. But
+she was obliged to confer marks of her attachment on him as privately
+as she could, for Allan's visits were by no means so acceptable to
+her husband as to herself. Indeed, Torloisk liked so little to see
+the lad, that he determined to put some affront on him, which should
+prevent his returning to the castle for some time. An opportunity for
+executing his purpose soon occurred.
+
+The lady one morning, looking from the window, saw her son coming
+wandering down the hill, and hastened to put a girdle cake upon
+the fire, that he might have hot bread to his breakfast. Something
+called her out of the apartment after making this preparation, and
+her husband entering at the same time, saw at once what she had been
+about, and determined to give the boy such a reception as should
+disgust him for the future. He snatched the cake from the girdle,
+thrust it into his step-son's hands, which he forcibly closed on the
+scalding bread, saying, "Here, Allan--here is a cake which your mother
+has got ready for your breakfast." Allan's hands were severely burnt;
+and, being a sharp-witted and proud boy, he resented this mark of his
+step-father's ill-will, and came not again to Torloisk.
+
+At this time the western seas were covered with the vessels of
+pirates, who, not unlike the sea-kings of Denmark at an early period,
+sometimes settled and made conquests on the islands. Allan-a-Sop was
+young, strong, and brave to desperation. He entered as a mariner on
+board of one of these ships, and in process of time obtained the
+command, first of one galley, then of a small flotilla, with which he
+sailed round the seas and collected considerable plunder, until his
+name became both feared and famous. At length he proposed to himself
+to pay a visit to his mother, whom he had not seen for many years; and
+setting sail for this purpose, he anchored one morning in the Sound of
+Ulva, and in front of the house of Torloisk. His mother was dead, but
+his stepfather, to whom he was now an object of fear as he had been
+formerly of aversion, hastened to the shore to receive his formidable
+son-in-law, with great affectation of kindness and interest in his
+prosperity; while Allan-a-Sop, who, though very rough and hasty, does
+not appear to have been sullen or vindictive, seemed to take his kind
+reception in good part.
+
+The crafty old man succeeded so well, as he thought, in securing
+Allan's friendship, and in obliterating all recollections of the
+former affront put on him, that he began to think it possible to
+employ him in executing his private revenge upon MacKinnon of Ulva,
+with whom, as was usual between such neighbours, he had some feud.
+With this purpose, he offered what he called the following good advice
+to his son-in-law:--"My dear Allan, you have now wandered over the
+seas long enough; it is time you should have some footing upon land,
+a castle to protect yourself in winter, a village and cattle for your
+men, and a harbour to lay up your galleys. Now, here is the island
+of Ulva, near at hand, which lies ready for your occupation, and it
+will cost you no trouble, save that of putting to death the present
+proprietor, the Laird of MacKinnon, a useless old carle, who has
+cumbered the world long enough."
+
+Allan-a-Sop thanked his stepfather for so happy a suggestion, which
+he declared he would put in execution forthwith. Accordingly, setting
+sail the next morning, he appeared before MacKinnon's house an hour
+before noon. The old chief of Ulva was much alarmed at the menacing
+apparition of so many galleys, and his anxiety was not lessened by the
+news, that they were commanded by the redoubted Allan-a-Sop. Having
+no effectual means of resistance, MacKinnon, who was a man of shrewd
+sense, saw no alternative save that of receiving the invaders,
+whatever might be their purpose, with all outward demonstrations of
+joy and satisfaction. He caused immediate preparations to be made for
+a banquet as splendid as circumstances admitted, hastened down to
+the shore to meet the rover, and welcomed him to Ulva with such an
+appearance of sincerity, that the pirate found it impossible to pick
+any quarrel which might afford a pretence for executing the violent
+purpose which he had been led to meditate.
+
+They feasted together the whole day; and in the evening, as
+Allan-a-Sop was about to retire to his ships, he thanked the Laird
+of MacKinnon for his entertainment, but remarked, with a sigh, that
+it had cost him very dear. "How can that be" said MacKinnon, "when I
+bestowed this entertainment upon you in free good-will?"--"It is true,
+my friend," replied the pirate, "but then it has quite disconcerted
+the purpose for which I came hither; which was to put you to death,
+my good friend, and seize upon your house and island, and so settle
+myself in the world. It would have been very convenient, this island,
+but your friendly reception has rendered it impossible for me to
+execute my purpose; so that I must be a wanderer on the seas for some
+time longer." Whatever MacKinnon felt at hearing that he had been so
+near to destruction, he took care to show no emotion save surprise,
+and replied to his visiter,--"My dear Allan, who was it that put into
+your mind so unkind a purpose towards your old friend; for I am sure
+it never arose from your own generous nature? It must have been your
+father-in-law, old Torloisk, who made such an indifferent husband to
+your mother, and such an unfriendly stepfather to you when you were a
+helpless boy; but now, when he sees you a bold and powerful leader, he
+desires to make a quarrel betwixt you and those who were the friends
+of your youth. If you consider this matter rightly, Allan, you will
+see that the estate and harbour of Torloisk lie as conveniently for
+you as those of Ulva, and that, if you are to make a settlement by
+force, it is much better it should be at the expense of the old churl,
+who never showed you kindness or countenance, than at that of a friend
+like me, who always loved and honoured you."
+
+Allan-a-Sop was struck with the justice of this reasoning; and the old
+offence of his scalded fingers was suddenly recalled to his mind. "It
+is very true what you say, MacKinnon," he replied, "and, besides, I
+have not forgotten what a hot breakfast my father-in-law treated me to
+one morning. Farewell for the present; you shall soon hear news of me
+from the other side of the Sound." Having said thus much, the pirate
+got on board, and commanding his men to unmoor the galleys, sailed
+back to Torloisk, and prepared to land in arms. His father-in-law
+hastened to meet him, in expectation to hear of the death of his
+enemy, MacKinnon. But Allan greeted him in a very different manner
+from what he expected. "You hoary old traitor," he said, "you
+instigated my simple good-nature to murder a better man than yourself.
+But have you forgotten how you scorched my fingers twenty years
+ago, with a burning cake? The day is come that that breakfast must
+be paid for." So saying, he dashed out his father-in-law's brains
+with a battle-axe, took possession of his castle and property,
+and established there a distinguished branch of the clan of
+MacLean.--_Tales of a Grandfather--Second Series._
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+ADVANTAGES OF A GOOD HEART,
+
+_A Fragment from the "Disowned," by the author of "Pelham."_
+
+
+"The next day, Sir Christopher Findlater called on Clarence. 'Let us
+lounge into the park,' said he. 'With pleasure,' replied Clarence;
+and into the park they lounged. By the way they met a crowd, who
+were hurrying a man to prison. The good-hearted Sir Christopher
+stopped--'Who is that poor fellow?' said he. 'It is the
+celebrated'--(in England all criminals are celebrated. Thurtell was
+a hero, Thistlewood a patriot, and Fauntleroy was discovered to be
+exactly like Bonaparte)--'it is the celebrated robber, John Jefferies,
+who broke into Mrs. Wilson's house, and cut the throats of herself and
+her husband, wounded the maid-servant, and split the child's skull
+with the poker.' * * * 'John Jefferies!' exclaimed the baronet, 'let
+us come away.' 'Linden,' continued Sir Christopher, 'that fellow was
+my servant once. He robbed me to some considerable extent. I caught
+him. He appealed to my heart, and you know, my dear fellow, that was
+irresistible, so I let him off. Who could have thought he would have
+turned out so?' And the baronet proceeded to eulogize his own good
+nature, by which it is just necessary to remark, that one miscreant
+had been saved for a few years from transportation in order to rob and
+murder _ad libitum_, and having fulfilled the office of a common pest,
+to suffer on the gallows at last. What a fine thing it is to have a
+good heart! Both our gentlemen now sunk into a reverie, from which
+they were awakened, at the entrance of the park, by a young man in
+rags, who, with a piteous tone, supplicated charity. Clarence, who to
+his honour be it spoken, spent an allotted and considerable part of
+his income in judicious and laborious benevolence, had read a little
+of political morals, then beginning to be understood, and walked on.
+The good-hearted baronet put his hand in his pocket, and gave the
+beggar half-a-guinea, by which a young, strong man, who had only just
+commenced the trade, was confirmed in his imposition for the rest of
+his life; and instead of the useful support, became the pernicious
+incumbrance of society. Sir Christopher had now recovered his spirits.
+'What's like a good action?' said he to Clarence, with a swelling
+breast. The park was crowded to excess; our loungers were joined by
+Lord St. George. His lordship was a staunch Tory. He could not endure
+Wilkes, liberty, or general education. He launched out against the
+enlightenment of domestics. 'What has made you so bitter?' said Sir
+Christopher. 'My valet!' cried Lord St. George; 'he has invented a new
+toasting-fork; is going to take out a patent, make his fortune, _and
+leave me_; that's what I call ingratitude, Sir Christopher; for I
+ordered his wages to be raised five pounds but last year.' 'It _was_
+very ungrateful,' said the ironical Clarence. 'Very!' reiterated
+the good-hearted Sir Christopher. 'You cannot recommend me a valet,
+Findlater,' renewed his lordship; 'a good, honest, sensible fellow,
+who can neither read nor write?' 'N--o--o--that is to say, yes! I can;
+my old servant, Collard, is out of place, and is as ignorant as--as--'
+'I--or you are,' said Lord St. George, with a laugh. 'Precisely,'
+replied the baronet. 'Well, then, I take your recommendation: send
+him to me to-morrow at twelve.' 'I will,' said Sir Christopher. 'My
+dear Findlater,' cried Clarence, when Lord St. George was gone, 'did
+you not tell me some time ago, that Collard was a great rascal, and
+closely _lie_ with Jefferies? and now you recommend him to Lord St.
+George!' 'Hush, hush, hush!' said the baronet; 'he was a great rogue,
+to be sure; but poor fellow, he came to me yesterday with tears in his
+eyes, and said he should starve if I would not give him a character;
+so what could I do?' 'At least, tell Lord St. George the truth,'
+observed Clarence. 'But then Lord St. George would not take him!'
+rejoined the good-hearted Sir Christopher, with forcible _naivete_.
+'No, no, Linden, we must not be so hard-hearted; we must forgive and
+forget;' and so saying, the baronet threw out his chest, with the
+conscious exultation of a man who has uttered a noble sentiment. The
+moral of this little history is, that Lord St. George, having been
+pillaged 'through thick and thin,' as the proverb has it, for two
+years, at last missed a gold watch, and Monsieur Collard finished his
+career, as his exemplary tutor, Mr. John Jefferies, had done before
+him. Ah! what a fine thing it is to have a good heart. But, to return,
+just as our wanderers had arrived at the further end of the park, Lady
+Westborough and her daughter passed them. Clarence excusing himself to
+his friend, hastened towards them, and was soon occupied in saying the
+prettiest things in the world to the prettiest person, at least in his
+eyes; while Sir Christopher, having done as much mischief as a good
+heart well can do in a walk of an hour, returned home to write a long
+letter to his mother, against 'learning and all such nonsense, which
+only served to blunt the affections and harden the heart.' 'Admirable
+young man!' cried the mother, with tears in her eyes; 'a good heart is
+better than all the heads in the world.' Amen!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+SPIRIT OF THE PUBLIC JOURNALS.
+
+QUADRANGLE OF KING'S COLLEGE, CAMBRIDGE.
+
+
+In the last _New Monthly Magazine_ is an excellent account of this
+splendid structure, in _A Day at Cambridge_,--in which occurs the
+following exquisite little descriptive gem:--
+
+With the exception of a gravel walk, running near to the buildings on
+every side, the whole ground-plot of this quadrangle is covered by an
+unbroken turf, kept, by means of constant and almost hourly attention,
+in that exquisite order which is only to be observed in spots devoted
+to similar purposes, here and at Oxford. The effect of an unbroken
+plot of turf of this kind and quality, and in a situation like this,
+is perfectly unique, and perhaps indescribable. It is supposed to be,
+and in fact is, for all purposes of preservation and beauty, sacred
+from the foot of man or beast; and the feeling arising from this
+circumstance, added to the exquisite natural adaptation of the object
+itself to the purposes of rest and relief from the almost dazzling
+architectural splendour of the surrounding objects, is such as cannot
+be communicated by any other means whatever, and we might in vain
+attempt to describe. It is of such a kind, however, that those who
+are capable of experiencing it, would as soon think of treading upon
+the object that conveys it to them, as those who honour Nature would
+think of rooting up a nest of violets. Speaking for ourselves alone,
+there is but one thing that can disturb and deteriorate the absolute
+tranquillity of mind, and peace of heart, which fall upon us, like
+dew from heaven, on entering a place like that we have attempted to
+describe above; it is, to see a capped and gowned Fellow, profaning
+with his footsteps the floor of that, in some sort, sacred temple,
+merely because he can, by so doing, reach his habitation by a few
+footsteps less than if he kept to the path allotted for him. We look
+upon the act as a species of impiety; to say nothing of its proving,
+to a demonstration, that the person who commits it is either utterly
+insensible to the mysterious harmony that subsists between a certain
+class of natural objects and the heart of man; or utterly disregards
+that harmony, and sets it at naught. He is, in fact, one of whom it
+may in one sense be said, that
+
+ "He hath no music in his soul."
+
+And we are almost tempted to complete the quotation, by adding--
+
+ "Let no such man be trusted!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+A RUSTIC PAIR.
+
+_By Miss Mitford_.
+
+Few damsels of twelve years old, generally a very pretty age, were
+less pretty that Hannah Bint. Short and stunted in her figure, thin
+in face, sharp in feature, with a muddled complexion, wild sun-burnt
+hair, and eyes, whose very brightness had in them something startling,
+over-informed, super-subtle, too clever for her age. At twelve years
+old she had quite the air of a little old fairy. Now, at seventeen,
+matters are mended. Her complexion has cleared; her countenance, her
+figure, has shot up into height and brightness, and a sort of rustic
+grace; her bright, acute eye is softened and sweetened by the womanly
+wish to please; her hair is trimmed, and curled, and brushed with
+exquisite neatness; and her whole dress arranged with that nice
+attention to the becoming, the suitable both in form and texture,
+which would be called the highest degree of coquetry, if it
+did not deserve the better name of propriety. Never was such a
+transmogrification beheld. The lass is really pretty, and Ned Miles
+has discovered that she is so. There he stands, the rogue, close at
+her aide, (for he hath joined her whilst we have been telling her
+little story, and the milking is over!)--there he stands--holding her
+milk-pail in one hand, and stroking Watch with the other; whilst she
+is returning the compliment, by patting Neptune's magnificent head.
+There they stand, as much like lovers as may be; he smiling, and she
+blushing--he never looking so handsome, nor she so pretty, in all
+their lives. There they stand, in blessed forgetfulness of all except
+each other--as happy a couple as ever trod the earth. There they
+stand, and one would not disturb them for all the milk and butter in
+Christendom. I should not wonder if they were fixing the wedding-day.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+RECOLLECTIONS OF A R*T.
+
+_(Concluded from page 365.)_
+
+
+Finding a detachment just setting out to join the Grand Allied Army, I
+thought, as a true Briton, I could do no less than accompany it, and
+prevailed upon all our party to do the same.
+
+The detachment with which I marched, consisted of 80,000. As we had
+little baggage, having crossed the Rhine, we proceeded rapidly through
+a dull, uninteresting country.
+
+The town of Coblentz is situated at the junction of the Rhine
+and the Moselle. Here the majestic Rhine gently flows along in
+all its grandeur, separating the town from the noble fortress of
+Ehrenbreitstein.[1] I crossed over the bridge of boats, and made
+a most minute inspection of this very romantic castle, which gave
+me great pleasure indeed. In a few days I availed myself of a
+passage-boat which was going to Mayence, and was quite enraptured with
+the view on all sides. Rhenish wines, and perhaps also the water,
+I found did not well agree with my stomach; and no inconsiderable
+annoyance, I soon experienced. They seemed, however, to have exactly
+the same effect upon every Englishman I saw, so I was not singular. A
+little brandy soon, however, put me all to rights; and by the time I
+reached Strasbourg, I was perfectly well again, and able to do ample
+justice to her Splendid Pies! I attended high mass in the great
+Cathedral of Strasbourg, and was surprised and pleased at the sight
+of 10,000 soldiers, in review order, drawn up within its walls. It
+was tiresome enough work mounting to the top of the spire, (which
+I ascertained, by the steps I took, to be exactly 490 feet high,
+Strasbourg measure; and this is exactly eight feet higher than St.
+Peter's at Rome), but I made it out, notwithstanding the sulky looks
+of the jackanapes who lives at the top. Nothing can surpass the beauty
+of the view from this cathedral. At your feet you have the ancient
+town, with all its regular fortifications and outworks--the majestic
+Rhine, with its bridge of boats, and ruined Gothic bridge, sublime in
+its decay--and as far as the eye can reach you have an exceedingly
+rich country, everywhere speckled with towns, and fertilized by
+luxuriant streams.
+
+ [1] Apropos--our _Supplement_ contains a fine Engraving of this
+ very spot.
+
+I made a point of visiting my venerable friend, the old Comte de
+Strasbourg, who, unchanged in the rolling on of centuries, lies in his
+glass coffin, to all appearance in the same freshness of health and
+vigour in which, when myself a very young man, I saw him many hundred
+years ago;[1] his countess, his son, and his daughter, keep him
+company, each in their separate place of repose. Alas, alas! the sight
+made me weep.
+
+ [1] The venerable count died about the year 1519. The glass
+ coffins are still shown.
+
+A few days afterwards, I was rather unexpectedly stopped in my tour.
+For a night I had taken up my residence in the carriage of a young
+Englishman, who that day arrived from Rome, the hostler having assured
+me that he would remain for some time. I did so, as I found it much
+quieter and cooler than the hotel "La ville de Lyon," which was
+overcrowded. In the morning, I thought my friends were merely going a
+short drive, so I kept my seat. We, however, travelled on till night,
+when I heard we were bound for London; but as my companions were very
+agreeable, I thought I might as well accompany them the whole way.
+They seemed to be annoyed at every posthouse with their passports,
+&c.; I was never even asked about the matter. The custom-house gentry,
+in their searches, to be sure, occasionally gave me a little trouble,
+but I was soon up to their tricks. We had an avant-courier constantly
+galloping before us, and we travelled with such expedition that we
+reached London in five days; for my fellow-travellers were idle young
+men of fortune, who are of course always in the greatest hurry for the
+end of a journey, because they don't know what to make of themselves
+when it is over.
+
+I had not then an opportunity of seeing Paris, as we only changed
+horses in it. I have since, however, spent many months there, and have
+always been very much pleased with every thing I saw, particularly the
+Catacombs, which were my favourite lounge. When last in Paris, I made
+a narrow escape with my life, as I tumbled headlong into a cask of
+brandy. I, however, managed to scramble out, with the assistance of a
+bit of cord, which happened to be hanging over its side, and which my
+friend pushed in to me. I was little the worse of my ducking; for, as
+soon as I got out, I was set a-laughing by his telling me how to spell
+_brandy_, in both French and English, in three letters, viz. "B.R. and
+Y." and "O.D.V."
+
+In London I made a point, as a stranger, of going everywhere, and was
+certainly much delighted with every thing. I must confess, however,
+that I thought all the acting at the Opera and Theatres, and all the
+eloquence of the Houses of Parliament, as nothing in comparison of
+what I saw and tasted at the East India and London Docks. When I
+was in the House of Lords, a companion whispered to me, that he had
+heard an act read, offering a reward of 10,000_l._ for a _male_
+tortoise-shell cat. This I believe, indeed, is a very safe offer, for
+such a thing was never heard of. And it is certainly as much worth
+their while as making an act that I should never have more than six
+dishes of meat at my dinner, or that I should not be buried in linen
+above twenty shillings Scots value per ell, although I wished it
+particularly, and could well afford to pay for it. There was, however,
+one restrictive act, which had sense in it; and the husbands of the
+present day would, I dare say, give their ears that it were still in
+force, whatever the dressmakers might think of it. But many of their
+acts of Parliament are silly enough--as they must be; for they don't
+like to be thought idle, and imagine that it is necessary to be always
+enacting something.
+
+It is curious, indeed, how fashion should be every thing in the great
+city. A lady could not possibly venture to see her dearest friend on
+earth, or even her own sister, if she happened to live in rather an
+unfashionable part of the town. By so doing, she would expose herself
+to her own footmen, who very properly would lose all respect for her,
+and I suppose instantly leave her service, as, poor fellows, they have
+a rank in life to keep up!! John Bull certainly gives himself many
+airs, to say the least of it. After receiving the greatest kindness
+and hospitality from you in Scotland, and perhaps staying for months
+in your house, he will cut you dead in London. I remember once meeting
+with such a return, but took it, of course, very coolly. Next day,
+when I was arm in arm with ---- ----, I happened again to meet my
+quondam friend, who immediately rushed up to me--I, however, turned
+on my tail, and did not know him.--Fashion is an odd thing after all.
+It is not rank which will do. I have seen many a spendthrift young
+commoner cut his uncle the duke; and being a duchess by no means
+will ensure admittance at Almack's.--I thank my stars, I am not
+fashionable, and am always happy to see my friends!
+
+I was persuaded, soon after reaching London, to go down to Essex for
+a few days, to pay a visit to an old friend. When I arrived at his
+house, which I think they called Waltham Abbey, I was sorry to receive
+the melancholy accounts that he had been devoured, and that, if I did
+not instantly take myself off, I should be dealt with in the same
+manner. The truth was, that a famine had arisen; and it is well known,
+on those occasions, as necessity has no law, that the stronger kills
+the weaker. Day after day the combat is renewed, till at last all
+except one are destroyed, and he is then obliged to decamp, or eat
+himself up, as he likes best. It is in this way that castles, houses,
+&c. which have been long infested by us, are so suddenly entirely
+freed from our presence.
+
+I amused myself in making an excursion to Epping Forest, till I
+thought the civil war at my late friend's habitation might have
+proceeded far enough for my presence to be useful. In the forest,
+one day, I had the luck to kill one of those troublesome reptiles--a
+Tom Cat. I believe, however, it was a house one. After a hard day's
+hunting his highness made too free at a Valerian party. I watched my
+opportunity, and soon put an effectual end to his caterwauling. When
+I returned to the abbey, I found I was in the best possible time--the
+garrison being reduced to about a dozen, and they so weakened and
+tired out with the constant worrying work they had had, that I was
+myself a complete match for any two of them. In a few days the number
+was only four, and in other two days I was sole lord and master.
+
+[He then returns to town.]
+
+At a friend's house, in Berkeley Square, where I met a distinguished
+party, a scene took place, just such as Pope describes--
+
+ Our courtier walks from dish to dish;
+ Tastes, for his friend, of fowl and fish:
+ "That jelly's rich, that malmsey's healing,
+ Pray dip your whiskers and your tail in."
+ Was ever such a happy swain?
+ He stuffs, and swills, and stuffs again.
+ "I'm quite ashamed--'Tis mighty rude
+ To eat so much; but all's so good!
+ I have a thousand thanks to give,
+ My lord alone knows how to live."--
+ No sooner said, but from the hall
+ Rush chaplain, butler, dogs, and all:
+ "A r--t, a r--t! clap to the door!"--
+
+I, however, made good my exit, and was nothing the worse of a
+practical warning to be more cautious in future.
+
+It would be endless for me to describe all my after voyages and
+travels. Suffice it to say, I have been both east and west, north
+and south; and there is scarcely a part of the habitable globe which
+I have not visited. After all, I have come to this conclusion, that
+there is no country like Britain. Oh! how I could wish my human
+existence had been in such happy times and under such glorious
+sovereigns as a George the Third, and George the Fourth!!!
+
+For some years I have remained in this country, enjoying (like a
+patriarch of old) a quiet, regular life with my family, which now
+amounts to above 2,000. I, however, keep very much to my own room,
+as I hate bustle, and like to enjoy my own reflections.
+
+The age to which our species can exist is not ascertained, as never
+one of us was known to die in his bed, at least a natural death. A
+kind of instinct I have always had, has as yet saved me from arsenic,
+stewed corks, traps, stamps, &c.; and my great strength, and a
+good deal of science, which is of more consequence, have, as yet,
+preserved me in many a deadly combat, both with my own species, and
+with the dog, the ferret, the weasel, the hawk, and that green-eyed
+monster--the cat. But I am now getting somewhat stiffer, and am not
+so sharp as I was. I am not--
+
+ "--qualis eram, quum primam aciem Praeneste sub ipsa
+ Stravi, scutorumque incendi victor acervos;
+ Et regem hac Herilum dextra sub Tartara misi!!"
+
+And in some evil hour my time must come.
+
+--I am well aware, indeed, of the fleeting existence even of this
+world itself, for I studied astronomy with the celebrated M. Olbers
+of Bremen, and assisted him in making many useful observations and
+discoveries, particularly regarding comets, in the course of which
+we came to this melancholy conclusion, that the comet which was
+afterwards visible in 1786 and 1795, will, in 83,000 years, approach
+the earth as nearly as the moon; and that in 4,000,000 years it
+will come to within a distance of 7,700 geographical miles;--the
+consequence of which will be (if its attraction be equal to that of
+the earth) the elevation of the waters of the ocean 13,000 feet; that
+is to say, above the tops of all the European mountains, except Mount
+Blanc. The inhabitants of the Andes and of the Himalaya mountains
+alone will escape this second deluge; but they will not benefit by
+their good fortune more than 216,000,000 years, for it is probable,
+that at the expiration of that time, our globe standing right in the
+way of the comet, will receive a shock severe enough to ensure its
+utter destruction!!!
+
+_Note._--After reading over the above MS., I am inclined to come to
+this conclusion--that our historian, while in a human form, must have
+been a Scottish nobleman--that he probably was born about the year
+1501--and that he lived to about the age of 89.--_Ed._
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE FANCY BALL.
+
+
+ "A visor for a visor! what care I
+ What curious eye doth quote deformities!"
+ SHAKSPEARE.
+
+ "You used to talk," said Miss Mac Call,
+ "Of flowers, and flames, and Cupid;
+ But now you never talk at all.
+ You're getting vastly stupid.
+ You'd better burn your Blackstone, Sir,
+ You never will get through it;
+ There's a Fancy Ball at Winchester--
+ Do let us take you to it."
+
+ I made that night a solemn vow,
+ To startle all beholders:
+ I wore white muslin on my brow,
+ Green velvet on my shoulders--
+ My trousers were supremely wide,
+ I learn'd to swear "by Allah"--
+ I stuck a poniard by my side,
+ And called myself "Abdallah."
+
+ Oh! a Fancy Ball's a strange affair,
+ Made up of silks and leathers,
+ Light heads, light heels, false hearts, false hair,
+ Pins, paint, and ostrich feathers:
+ The dullest Duke in all the town,
+ To-night may shine a droll one--
+ And rakes, who have not half-a-crown,
+ Look royal with a whole one.
+
+ Hail, blest Confusion! here are met
+ All tongues, and times, and faces,
+ The Lancers flirt with Juliet,
+ The Bramin talks of races;
+ And where's your genius, bright Corinne?
+ And where your brogue, Sir Lucius?
+ And Chinca Ti, you have not seen
+ One chapter of Confucius.
+
+ Lo! dandies from Kamschatka flirt
+ With beauties from the Wrekin--
+ And belles from Berne look very pert
+ On Mandarins from Pekin;
+ The Cardinal is here from Rome,
+ The Commandant from Seville--
+ And Hamlet's father from the tomb,
+ And Faustus from the Devil.
+
+ What mean those laughing Nuns, I pray,
+ What mean they, Nun or Fairy:
+ I guess they told no beads to-day,
+ And sang no Ave Mary.
+ From Mass and Matins, Priest and Pix,
+ Barred door, and window grated,
+ I wish all pretty Catholics
+ Were thus emancipated.
+
+ Four Seasons come to dance quadrilles,
+ With four well-seasoned sailors--
+ And Raleigh talks of rail-road bills,
+ With Timon, prince of railers.
+ I find Sir Charles of Aubyn Park
+ Equipp'd for a walk to Mecca--
+ And I run away from Joan of Arc,
+ To romp with sad Rebecca.
+
+ Fair Cleopatra's very plain,
+ Puck halts, and Ariel swaggers--
+ And Caesar's murder'd o'er again,
+ Though not by Roman daggers.
+ Great Charlemagne is four feet high--
+ Sad Stuff has Bacon spoken--
+ Queen Mary's waist is all awry,
+ And Psyche's nose is broken.
+
+ Our happiest bride, how very odd!
+ Is the mourning Isabella,
+ And the heaviest foot that ever trod
+ Is the foot of Cinderella.
+ Here sad Calista laughs outright,
+ There Yorick looks most grave, Sir,
+ And a Templar waves the cross to-night,
+ Who never cross'd the wave, Sir.
+
+ And what a Babel is the talk!
+ "The Giraffe"--"plays the fiddle"--
+ "Macadam's roads"--"I hate this chalk"--
+ "Sweet girl"--"a charming riddle"--
+ "I'm nearly drunk with"--"Epsom salts"--
+ "Yes, separate beds"--"such cronies!"--
+ "Good heaven! who taught that man to valtz?"--
+ "A pair of Shetland ponies."
+
+ "Lord D----" "an enchanting shape"--
+ "Will move for"--"Maraschino"
+ "Pray, Julia, how's your mother's ape?"--
+ "He died at Navarino!"
+ "The gout, by Jove, is"--"apple pie"--
+ "Don Miguel"--"Tom the tinker"--
+ "His Lordship's pedigree's as high
+ As ----" "Whipcord, dam by Clinker."
+
+ "Love's shafts are weak"--"my chestnut kicks"--
+ "Heart broken;"--"broke the traces"--
+ "What say you now of politics?"--
+ "Change sides and to your places"--
+ "A five-barred gate"--"a precious pearl"
+ "Grave things may all be punn'd on!"--
+ "The Whigs, thank God, are"--"out of curl!"--
+ "Her age is"--"four by London!"
+
+ Thus run the giddy hours away,
+ Till morning's light is beaming,
+ And we must go to dream by day
+ All we to-night are dreaming;
+ To smile and sigh, to love and change--
+ Oh! in our heart's recesses,
+ We dress in fancies quite as strange
+ As these our fancy-dresses.
+
+_New Monthly Magazine_.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+
+THE GATHERER.
+
+ A snapper up of unconsidered trifles
+ SHAKSPEARE.
+
+ Tho' lang an lonely be the road
+ Between me an my dearie;
+ Yet I the gate hae aften troad,
+ When I've been tired and wearie.
+
+ Be't stormin rain, hail, win or snaw--
+ A lonely road and drearie--
+ There's nought wad e'er keep me awa
+ Frae gaun to see my dearie!!!
+
+M.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+FRENCH BALL CONVERSATION.
+
+During the French revolution, parties danced as gaily as ever; the
+following is a ball conversation, which took place in the month of
+Frimare, year 7.:--Well, the Ottoman Porte has declared war against
+us! Oh yes, there is no doubt of it, (_En avant deux_) It is an enemy
+the more--(_chassez_) and the Russian fleet they say has passed the
+Dardanelles, (_en avant quatre_) yet the papers say that the emperor
+sincerely desires peace.--Yes, but Count Metternich wishes for war,
+(_balancez_) so we have also a new coalition against us. England,
+Portugal, Naples, Turkey, the Emperor, Russia, perhaps the empire
+of Prussia, (_Faites face et chassez tous les huit_)--well we have
+bayonettes, (_la poussette_) besides it is not so far from Dover to
+Calais, (_traversez_)--Do you belong to the conscription?--Yes, and I
+too; (_pirouettez_) what makes me uneasy is to know what will become
+of our partners when we are gone: (_La chaine des dames_)--what will
+be left to amuse them (_La queu du chat_.) It was thus that days of
+terror were preceded by evenings of amusement and pleasure.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+INTUITIVE AFFECTION.
+
+"There are three things," said a wit, "which I have always loved
+without ever understanding them, painting, music, and woman."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+
+RETORT UNCOURTEOUS.
+
+A lady, well known in the fashionable vicinity of Portland-place,
+always accosts a stranger, with "I think I have seen you somewhere,"
+which often leads to a clue for her finding out the history of the
+party. One evening she played off the same game on a gentleman, who
+replied, "Most likely, madam, for I sometimes go there."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+With the present Number is published the SECOND SUPPLEMENT of
+the Spirit of the Annuals--containing Poetry and Prose by Allan
+Cunningham, Professor Wilson, the late P.B. Shelley, Miss Landon,
+Mrs. Hemans, Mr. Pringle, Theodore Hook, and other distinguished
+Writers--with a beautiful Engraving.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Purchasers of the MIRROR, who may wish to complete their sets are
+informed, that every volume is complete in itself, and may be
+purchased separately. The whole of the numbers are now in print, and
+can be procured by giving an order to any Bookseller or Newsvender.
+
+Complete sets Vol. I. to XI. in boards, price L2. 19s. 6d. half bound,
+L3. 17s.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+_LIMBIRD'S EDITIONS._
+
+CHEAP and POPULAR WORKS published at the MIRROR OFFICE in the Strand,
+near Somerset House.
+
+The ARABIAN NIGHTS' ENTERTAINMENTS, Embellished with nearly 150
+Engravings. Price 6s. 6d. boards.
+
+The TALES of the GENII. Price 2s.
+
+The MICROCOSM. By the Right Hon. G. CANNING, &c. Price 2s.
+
+PLUTARCH'S LIVES, with Fifty Portraits, 2 vols. price 13s. boards.
+
+COWPER'S POEMS, with 12 Engravings, price 3s. 6d. boards.
+
+COOK'S VOYAGES, 2 vols. price 8s. boards.
+
+The CABINET of CURIOSITIES: or WONDERS of the WORLD DISPLAYED Price
+5s. boards.
+
+BEAUTIES of SCOTT. 2 vols. price 7s. boards.
+
+The ARCANA of SCIENCE for 1828. Price 4s. 6d.
+
+*** Any of the above Works can be purchased in Parts.
+
+GOLDSMITH'S ESSAYS. Price 8d.
+
+DR. FRANKLIN'S ESSAYS. Price 1s. 2d.
+
+BACON'S ESSAYS. Price 8d.
+
+SALMAGUNDI. Price 1s. 8d.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+_Printed and Published by J. LIMBIRD 143, Strand, (near Somerset
+House,) London; sold by ERNEST FLEISCHER, 626, New Market, Leipsic;
+and by all Newsmen and Booksellers._
+
+
+
+***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MIRROR OF LITERATURE, AMUSEMENT,
+AND INSTRUCTION, VOL. 12, ISSUE 345, DECEMBER 6, 1828***
+
+
+******* This file should be named 10719.txt or 10719.zip *******
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